#but half With the context it sounds like it was just something with his personality rather than something Major. though i dont know
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To a point i dont like how much exposistion TBK has but i get a little jealous we dont have this for rodya. However.
#floyd.txt#it depends on how its handled but sometimes it is a lot at once but i am a fan of spreading it out. fun!#i wish the crime notebooks had every detail about rodyas life for me at least#it doesnt matter i have the power of imagination. tell me. im going to communicate with dostos ghost#even if not written down if you ever write and make characters you know you end up having lore that may never be mentioned#tell me everything sir#ive occasionally seen people think there was an Incident when he was 15 and this half makes me curious#but half With the context it sounds like it was just something with his personality rather than something Major. though i dont know#perhaps when he lost his father#it could make sense... rereading it now it just sounds like he got a little more withdrawn perhaps#which could easily track with such a loss. i dont believe we know exactly when that occured right? ya...#thinking...i miss rodya...
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MY EYES ONLY
𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: dom!chris x fem!reader
𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: a look into chris’s my eyes only…
𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: PURE FILTH, p in v, unprotected sex (nuh uh!), swearing, choking, stomach bulge, oral (female & male receiving), praising, degradation, daddy kink, jealousy, squirting, spanking, possessiveness, overstimulation, dumbification, cream pie, semi-public, ROUGH
𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 888
𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫'𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞: sorry for all the chris stuff lately i’m just so down bad for him but matt will make an appearance (hopefully) soon!
also… the last one will be turned into a fic😉
mattress digging deeper into your back every second, the hand around your throat only tightens. your small palm doesn’t even fit fully around his wrist. moans and pleas of ‘don’t stop!’ aren’t the only sounds echoing off the walls. the headboard bangs rapidly against the wall, a chuckle coming from chris every so often at your fucked-out state.
you two were extra horny this day, it seems, and of course, you had to take advantage of it. the video is taken from your drooling mouth down to the bulge in your stomach, chris quite literally balls deep inside of you. tits bouncing at the rapid pace he’s going, your nails dig deeper into his flesh. “yes! yes! yes!” you scream like a mantra, cum then coating his dick.
⋆⁺₊⋆ ❦ ⋆⁺₊⋆
to him, his finger slipped and “accidentally” pressed the post button. it starts casually with the desktop displaying fortnite, then he flips the camera to his face. a smug look is plastered on it before the camera flips again.
this time, it’s of you — under the desk with your boyfriend’s cock stuffed in your mouth. his other hand is wrapped around your locks in a makeshift ponytail, controlling the way you bob your head at a decent rhythm. all you have to do is sit there and take it.
looking at the camera with tears threatening to spill from your eyes, you smile, spit dribbling from the sides of your lips. he pushes your head down further to where the tip of your nose touches his pelvis, a gulp and gag going through his headphones before his face comes into view one last time. chris smiles smugly, with a caption that reads: we’re live! come hang out :)
⋆⁺₊⋆ ❦ ⋆⁺₊⋆
legs draped over his shoulders, your fingers massage lightly at the brunette between your plush thighs. the phone is propped up on the nightstand to make sure your entire body is in view. his tongue laps agonizingly slow on your puffy cunt, but it feels so good.
you’ve been a good girl all week; no attitude, no talking back, good manners, etc. you were in for a reward. this is your reward. he wants to eat you out like no other. until you see stars and that’s it.
soft moans fill the air, eyes fluttering closed and your mind blank. just how chris likes it.
growing closer to your high, you get impatient before rutting your hips forward, your moans growing louder. he hums disapprovingly, leaving your dripping hole empty. “no need to get naughty now, baby. i thought you were a good girl for me?”
“i am.” you whimper. “i’m sorry, daddy.”
thrusting his hips subconsciously into the mattress because of the nickname, he delves back in to suck on your clit. that alone washes the first of many orgasms through you. you end up passing out at the end.
⋆⁺₊⋆ ❦ ⋆⁺₊⋆
an argument sparked this beauty, which is also chris’s personal favorite. for context, you guys argued over something stupid before going to a party. because you’re so petty, you decided to purposely talk with a random guy at the function to get chris’s blood boiling. giving him those ‘fuck me’ eyes from across the room.
before you knew it, you were holding on for dear life on a pillow in a random bedroom he dragged you into. the velvet dress you’re wearing is bunched above your ass, and your panties are ripped in half and thrown to the floor. crying out apologies into the blanket is no use, skin stinging with his handprint on it. the video is hard to make out because of how fast the phone is shaking in his hand.
“fucking brat.” he spanks you again, a sob leaving your throat. “you think he can fuck you stupid like this? huh?”
his hand makes contact at least three more times during that sentence, and your body shakes uncontrollably. he already ripped two orgasms out of you. “that’s right. take it just like that — whose pussy is this?”
“yours.” you exhale, squirting without warning from the overwhelming pleasure and penetration.
gripping the top of your hair, he lifts your head. “scream it, slut. they can’t hear you.”
“yours, chris! it’s all yours!” you gasp, knuckles white from your grasp on the sheets.
looking down at the way his cock brutally thrusts in and out of your tight pussy, his jaw slacks at the sight. you clench around him as his tip repeatedly hits your cervix, eyes rolling when you cum harder than ever before.
he arches your back further to get as deep as he can with a grunt. his hips stop, long ropes of cum spilling the farthest it goes into your womb. pulling out, he takes two fingers to help his seed stay inside you, the rest dripping down your legs the rest of the night.
⋆⁺₊⋆ ❦ ⋆⁺₊⋆
it’s dark. the photo is barely visible but visible at the same time if you look at it long enough. the table in front of you has a reflection of the moon, your tits that are painted white take up half of the screen. the other half is of your face, a smile peeking through your lip bite. a tatted arm snakes around your neck, the selfie angled up high.
be careful leaving your things behind, chris. the text says.
𝐭𝐚𝐠 𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭!
@bunbunbl0gs @lexisecretaccx @thy-mission @angelic-sturniolos111 @sophssturn @mattsneezing @janiellasblog @blahbel668 @meg-sturniolo @mattslolita @sturnbaby @imwetforyourmom @tillies33ssss @sturnifyed @raysmayhem-72 @ripmattitude @p1xieswrld @alorsxsturn @txssvx @sttzee @multiluvr @delilahprentiss @matthewsspecial @sturnolio-luvs @sturniolho @suga-daddy-69 @tworosesblackthorn @luckistar-posts @gnxosblog @junnniiieee07 @sturnioloslurps @tylerthecreatorsrealwife @flowerxbunnie @imaslut4kehlani @sturniolosandmoree @hertvgirl @asluttttforanakinskywalker @hearrtsturns @stars4matt @freshsturns @loverrsposts @sturnlcvr @elliesturniolo1 @tpvmz @user283926392 @lalalands86 @sukiipjs @sturniologirl813 @leahrab @chrissturniolosslut @h3arts4harry @sturnioloblogs @creamoncreamoncream2 @luv4kozume @ivyyyyyysposts @mirxcle1 @iluvm4ttsturni0l0 @catalina-island @mbsbaby @mattsdollie @pinkfarts @slut4mattsturn @thesturniolos @vickeyzloserz @nononopenono1 @bitchydragonparadise @gdsvhtwa @hrt-attack @bellasfavbisexual @dwntwn-strnlo @venusbabysblog @meerkatzthings @crazychrisl0v3r @maggieflms @strtuniolo @mutualsafe @riasturns @sturniolowhore @antpile00 @ashley9282828 @stingerayyy2 @sturnsjtop @luverboychris @yapperchris @imaslutforoldermen @madisonlovesyouu @poetatorturadaa @chr1sgirl4life @hiimolivia @jo-777 @sturnskiss @st4rgrlll @mattyblover07 @sm-ec @mattluvsmarni @knowingnothingnoel @mattsgirlfrieeend @bambi-slxt @sturnstvr @sturnclouds @bernardsbendystraws @maryx2xx
#chris sturniolo#matt sturniolo#nick sturniolo#christopher sturniolo#nicolas sturniolo#matthew sturniolo#sturniolo x reader#sturniolo fanfic#sturniolo smut#sturniolo imagine#chris sturniolo fanfic#chris sturniolo smut#matt sturniolo fanfic#matt sturniolo smut
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au where Johnny never joined the military (his knee got fucked up before he could and they wouldn’t let him enlist) but it’s okay because that means he got to go to college and study engineering, which is the closest he could get to being a civilian demolitions expert
Anyway, the city his college is in has an army base nearby, which means that every dating app he opens is flooded with army boys looking to marry the first person who so much as looks at them the right way. Johnny’s never been relationship-oriented; he likes hookups too much to settle down like that, but he loves scrolling through to drool over all of the gym pictures
And then one catches his eye. Simon. He doesn’t show his face on his profile, but his muscles more than make up for it. His appearance, though, isn’t what Johnny is most interested in, because his bio says…
Anyone interested in committing marriage fraud?
And that’s… something.
So of course Johnny swipes. He doesn’t expect to match, because Simon looks like a Greek God, and he almost throws his phone across the room when the little heart appears, telling him that he and Simon have both swiped on each other. Which means that Simon swiped on him first. It’s a heady feeling, but he’s not really sure why.
John: marriage fraud?
It’s not his strongest first message, but sue him, he’s curious.
Simon: I’m not interested in a relationship or even sex, but I have a very vested interest in being able to move off base
John: so, what? we get married and then…?
Simon: we don’t have to live together or even like each other. You can finish your studies, get the tax benefits, and live your life as you choose while I get to move off base and maintain my privacy
Honestly, it sounds like a win/win to Johnny. He’s not struggling financially per se, but being able to live exactly as he is while also gleaning tax benefits is… an attractive choice.
John: and if I meet someone else that I’m serious about?
Simon: I have no qualms about an uncontested divorce
John: let’s meet up for lunch and discuss the details
———
Lunch is a simple affair, just a local restaurant, frequented by students and soldiers alike, so they both fit in well. Simon is unfairly attractive, even if he only reveals the bottom half of his face to eat or drink. He’s massive and blond and his eyes do something to Johnny’s insides that he can’t bring himself to dissect further. They chat over their food, sharing details about themselves. Johnny shares more than Simon, and he has a hunch that that’s on purpose, but he doesn’t mind. They click instantly, and Johnny can tell that Simon is taken aback by that. It’s sweet, almost, the way that such a large military man is floundering in the face of genuine human connection. After they’ve finished, they turn to business.
With a quiet, deep voice, Simon lays out his entire plan, and Johnny is fully on board. He’s ready to sign the papers today, but they legally have to wait a month.
It’s the longest month of Johnny’s life.
They text constantly, or as constantly as they can. Sometimes Johnny feels inordinately young and sometimes very inferior; while he’s talking Simon’s ear off about some explosive compound used in building demolitions, Simon is off… doing god knows what, god knows where, serving the country. But Simon always listens, always sounds engaged over the phone when they call, always has follow-up questions that show he’s actually interested. And while Simon can’t talk much about his work, he can talk about details. Small stuff; the awful food, the hot dust where he’s stationed, the day-to-day activities that don’t give away too much. Johnny learns that he’s a lieutenant, a sniper (though that’s more through context clues than anything else), that he wears a mask all the time to protect himself, that he doesn’t like scrambled eggs (or at least, not military scrambled eggs), that he has a very complex skincare routine, that he respects the hell out of his captain. That he’s a good man, or tries to be. That he’s a sweetheart, deep down, despite trying to hide it.
They eventually get married, down at the courthouse, with Simon’s captain, Price, and Johnny’s best mate, Kyle, as witnesses.
And then life goes on. Johnny continues his studies, continues going to parties and hooking up with people every weekend, continues living his life. He assumes that Simon does the same. They keep in contact, for the most part, except when Simon’s in the field and he can’t have his phone, but he always brings back little inconsequential stories when he returns. It’s nice, in a way. They’d never exchanged rings, but sometimes Johnny wishes they had, just so he had something tangible to tie him to his husband.
I’m not sure how it would end, though…
Maybe it would be Sweet Home Alabama style, where Johnny finds someone that he thinks he loves and has to get Simon to sign the divorce papers, only to realize at the last minute that he really doesn’t want to, that he’s been in love with Simon all along
Maybe Simon gets medically discharged and ends up moving in with Johnny, where they both dance around their feelings for each other, despite already being married
Maybe they just… realize one day, that they’ve slowly but surely fallen in love with each other over the years and suddenly, nothing else matters because they’ve got a lot of lost time to make up for
#idk choose your own ending#talking to military boys on tinder has me thinking some thoughts#call of duty#cod#simon ghost riley#john soap mactavish#ghoap#ghostsoap#soapghost#tombstone's epitaphs#tombstone's ficlets#tombstone's skeleton fics
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I honestly didn't ever expect that I'd be in the position where I'd be using this blog not just to analyse what has come before in Homestuck, but to look toward the comic's future and do some real old-fashioned theorycrafting. but the time has come. so here goes; lime-bloods' Beyond Canon theories as of the July 6th 2024 update:
Vriska's Going to Hell
were all gonna help you! / whether you like it or not
a select few eagle-eyed readers already noticed that the sound used in last month's (Vriska: Figure shit out yourself.) is called "hell_tierwav". while it was easy to dismiss this as irrelevant composer shenanigans at the time, it's now become clear exactly what this was foreshadowing. whether it would be more apt to call this "Hell" or "Purrgatory" is probably up for debate - but whatever you call it, Vriska's been placed in a dimension seemingly tailored specifically for her personal torment.
while Vriska characteristically interprets the recreation of her childhood home as a symbol of how badass she was, the ghosts of her past - both literal, as the shades of the trolls she killed as Mindfang, and figurative, in the form of sprites wearing the faces of her dead friends - show us in no uncertain terms that Vriska's childhood home is the stage where traumas play out.
Erisolsprite puts it succinctly with his welcome to hell, but pay close attention to what exactly we're being welcomed to: this update ends on page 665. so as of this next update, we'll be starting on page 666.
Does Homestuck Have Hell?
the exact bubble of reality Vriska's currently found herself in seems to be an entirely new construction of the likes we've not yet seen in Homestuck - but that doesn't mean this kind of cosmic torment is without precedent. because while 666 is a number with Satanic connotations in the broader cultural context, it also has a very particular meaning of its own within the world of Homestuck. indeed, the latter half of the comic almost revolves around it, culminating in a climax in Act 6 Act 6 Act 6.
specifically, this repetition of a single digit is emblematic of recursive storytelling. to summarise what you can already read about in detail in my essay The World / The Wheel: when Caliborn is 'gifted' the Act 6 Act 6 supercartridge, which he is told is an "expansion" of Homestuck, it's a trick. there is no "expansion"; he's going to be trapped in a story that never ends because it keeps dividing into smaller and smaller versions of itself forever. the only way to truly beat the devil who trapped the heroes within a story is to trap him in his own story.
that's what Caliborn's "Hell" is, and that's also exactly what the Alternate Calliope achieved in Act 7 by creating the black hole which Vriska knocked Lord English into, ending Homestuck's story - something that Calliope even hints at in this very update, when she refers to the black hole as "containment"; not an accident, but a deliberately crafted prison. black holes are a symbol of recursion and regression; being sucked into one means being forced to live out your whole life over and over again, forever. so really, this is all we ever could have expected to happen when Vriska stepped into a black hole within a black hole! the presentation of the narrative even subtly hints at this; events in Beyond Canon that take place in the black hole are enclosed (in brackets), and now events that take place in a black hole-within-a-black-hole are contained within {curly brackets}, because you should always use a different kind of brackets to differentiate nested parenthesis from each other!
it is absolutely no coincidence that when Caliborn closes the curtains on his appearances in Homestuck, thinking he's won when really he's been condemned to a hell of his own making forever more, it's with a tribute to this exact same Sweet Bro and Hella Jeff strip.
IF YOU REMEMBER JUST ONE THING I SAY, OF SO MANY GREAT THINGS SAID BY ME, THEN PLEASE REMEMBER THIS. I WANTED TO PLAY A GAME.
So What Does That Mean?
one of Beyond Canon's central missions is expanding upon Homestuck's exploration of the relationships between author, text, and audience. as discussed above, a large part of Homestuck's thesis is the evil of forcing characters to live the same lives and the same stories over and over without the chance to grow or move on, and Beyond Canon picks up on this by placing Dirk in the position of trying to keep Homestuck going forever purely to appease its fans, while the Alternate Calliope continues to oppose this ideology. and while the alpha Calliope outwardly seems not to have taken a hard position on where she stands in this cosmic battle, the question posed by her device seems to be an entirely new one: can it actually be a good thing to regress, to return to ground that the story has already covered? can this path lead to something new, rather than merely stagnation?
it's so relevant that Vriska is being confronted with the crimes of her past, not only in the form of all the trolls she was personally responsible for killing but also in the form of the exact same punishment she condemned Lord English to with her heroism - complete with the herd of horses that are always present at Caliborn's demise! but where being condemned to an eternal cycle was fitting punishment for Caliborn, someone who refuses to break free of cycles of abuse and instead chooses to enact that same abuse on the world around him... if Vriska is someone who can break free of these cycles, who can change and become a better person despite what happened to her, will this punishment have the same effect? or, as Davepeta seems to believe, is forcing Vriska to reckon with her own past and traumas exactly what will allow her to break free of that cycle?
DAVE: [...] ill just be over here in the hyper gravity chamber training to beat lord english KARKAT: WE HAVE A HYPER GRAVITY CHAMBER???
it's hard not to be struck by the parallels in design and purpose between the Plot Point and Dragon Ball's Hyperbolic Time Chamber, and not just because of the Dragon Ball enthusiasts present on Beyond Canon's writing and art teams: albeit in typically Strider-bastardised form, the Time Chamber got a shoutout in Andrew Hussie's own Homestuck (see quote above), in a reference that was even picked up on by prolific theorist bladekindeyewear at the time. for the uninitiated: the Hyperbolic Time Chamber allowed its users to train for extended stretches of time, sometimes even spanning years, while a significantly smaller time period passed in the world outside - something that is actually true of real-life black holes! and with the Plot Point's own emphasis on time, represented by the hourglass included among its mechanisms, it seems to me that an essential part of making the 16-year-old Vriska ready for the trials ahead will be giving her the time to undergo the same growth her adult friends have experienced.
considering that Beyond Canon is already playing in the Ultimate Self space, where there are levels of power beyond merely the "god tiers", it also doesn't seem too farfetched to speculate that Vriska, forced to reckon with the fact that becoming a powerful Thief of Light isn't the be-all and end-all of personal growth, will take another leaf out of Dragon Ball's book here and ascend "beyond Super Saiyan". perhaps this is even the "hell tier" so cheekily alluded to in the Plot Point flash? certainly this kind of evolution would be the perfect way to challenge Dirk's belief that the Ultimate Self is the only logical final step for a character's development.
whatever the case, I believe we can take Davepeta at their word here. I don't think it's just a joke that by the end of this ordeal Vriska Serket is going to be fucking RIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIPPPPPPPPPED!
#homestuck#beyond canon#upd8#vriska#vriska serket#davepetasprite#caliborn#black holes#theory#< apparently ive used this tag before but i cant say what for. will have to check later
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I was given oral herpes by someone who didn't feel the need to disclose that they got cold sores before we had a one-time little dalliance.
I might've gone for it anyways. I'm self destructive. But I guess the lack of being able to choose whether to take the risk, it's left me feeling pretty bitter about the experience.
And I'm left feeling like a biohazard. I haven't really been able to explain to my friends yet why I'm suddenly extremely cagey about sharing my drinks and food. And all my favorite sexual activities are off the table forever. I know, dental dams, condoms, but half the fun of oral sex and making out is, you know, the taste, the heat, the absolute control. I was good at it.
It feels especially embarrassing since I'm ace and the whole reason I hooked up with the person was kind of... I don't know, fear that if I didn't, then we wouldn't be able to hang out anymore.
I'm not sure what I'm asking. Maybe, was it wrong for them not to disclose something like that? Considering how common it is? I feel obligated to disclose myself but maybe I'm just weird for that.
Thanks for doing what you do here.
Kind regards,
Asexual for Ethical Reasons Now I Guess
hi anon,
I don't often apologize for needing time to get to anons, because I really need people to have reasonable expectations about the amount of time I'm willing to commit to my inbox, but I am sorry for not getting to this one sooner. it's a topic that's very important to me, and I can tell you're dealing with a lot of hurt.
first off: I'm very sorry someone wasn't totally honest with you. that's never a good feeling, and especially in the context of sex it's a huge betrayal of trust. it's deeply unfair to you, and I hope you're able to recover from that.
having said that: you are not a biohazard. you're a person with an incredibly common virus. the World Health Organization estimates that somewhere around 80% of people worldwide have herpes (and that's a rough estimate, since they use different age ranges for HSV-1 and HSV-2). skip to the factual part of this tiktok at 00:10 seconds. herpes has been with us since before we were human; there's nothing disgusting or even unusual about having herpes.
herpes is different from most STIs in that it is lifelong, but that doesn't make you an unfuckable pariah. it makes you someone who may sometimes have open sores, and should give partners a heads up about your virus to avoid putting anyone in the same situation you're in. while you're at it, let them know that most people with herpes live asymptomatic and uncomplicated lives. many people never even know they have it!
I understand that spending the rest of your life with a viral buddy doesn't sound super fun right now, but I promise that as viruses go you can do WAY worse.
personally I've always felt the best way to get comfortable with something is to learn more about it. why not let clinical sexologist Dr. Doe talk to you about her own herpes, and how to be conscientious about minimizing the risk of sharing herpes with others?
youtube
youtube
or listen to writer Ella Dawson talk about learning to cope with the exact stigma you're currently struggling with?
or listen to Dr. Sydnee Smirl McElroy explain why herpes bears such a heavy stigma for such a mild virus in the first place?
you're not a biohazard, and neither is anyone else with an STI. that's a terrible way to think about yourself and others.
you're under no obligation to stop being sexually active if you don't want to be.
please don't feel that you have to have sex with anyone out of a sense of obligation anymore, but also please don't feel that herpes is a punishment. sickness isn't something that happens to people because they're bad or deserve, sickness happens to people because people get sick.
take care 💜
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𝐿𝒶𝓈𝓉 𝓃𝒾𝓰𝒽𝓉'𝓈 𝒹𝒾𝓈𝓉𝓊𝓇𝒷𝒶𝓃𝒸𝓮.
type: smut (tom kaulitz 2010 × fem reader)
includes: mastrubation, needy tom 💗 uh, blurb please! : tom suffers a painful erection and needed some help jerking off, only to be caught right after.
bambi's note! : soo...apparently i didn't get the request back...so i do hope the person finding this story will realise it's the request! it's abt 2010 tom jerking off on a call to readers voice and it ends up in a 'funny' moment!
Tom woke up at around 2 a.m. to a dreadful boner. He couldn’t remember what he was dreaming of, but it surely did trigger something in his sleep. He was insanely tired, but the feeling of his cock twitching and straining against the fabric of his pants really bothered him. He couldn’t go back to sleep. He was hard and he needed help. The first thing that came to his mind was you.
Letting out a small grunt, he quickly grabbed his cell from the small table by his bed, squinting at the light from the screen that beamed brightly into his eyes. He immediately scrolled through his contacts in search of your number. It was inconvenient of him to ring you up at such an hour, but his body urged him to. He needed to help himself.
“Fuck, pick up, pick up…” he muttered to himself, pressing the cellphone to his ear, the beeping sound replaying itself again and again. It was way too late for Tom to be calling, but he was insanely desperate.
“Hello?” You finally reply, your voice husky from just waking up at such a time.
“Sweetheart,” Tom said through the call, his voice a little rough.
It took you a second to really distinguish who was calling you. “What the hell are you calling me for?” You whine, still half awake, laying in your bed in a dark room, completely worn out and still in a slight daze. You were fighting the urge to just doze off.
On the other side of the phone, Tom was already pulling his pants down. His room was dark, and it was quiet. He focused on the sound of your voice. You could only hear him grunt, and you were a little confused, but you were too tired to even comprehend what was going on.
His cock was throbbing. It ached so badly, and he wanted to help himself quickly due to being so uncomfortable. The only way he could do that now was to hear you. You weren’t there with him physically, so he hoped this would work. His body was weak and he was insanely needy. “N-Nothing, I just…needed someone to talk to…” he responded, though his voice sounded quite uneasy. “J-Just…please talk…”
“What?” You ask, your voice cracking a little from disuse. You prop yourself up on your elbows, phone still at your ear as one of your free hands reaches to the side to pull the string of the lamp beside your bed which lit that corner you were in. You sit much more upright now, your back against the headboard as you continue to listen to Tom.
“Talk,” he said, his breath sounding a little heavy on his end. His hand wrapped around his hardened dick, beginning to stroke himself up and down. He needed to hear your voice, but you were still oblivious to the current situation he was in.
“Talk about what?” You ask. You were beyond confused on why Tom called you at such an hour. He was asking you to talk at 2 a.m. in the morning with no context whatsoever to the reason on why he called you in the first place, and you were not in the mood. You were sleepy, and you needed to rest. “Are you high, Tom? Did you drink? Go to bed.”
“Fuck,” he whimpered quietly, his right hand firm on his length as he pumped it up and down slowly to the sound of your sweet voice, imagining you were here teasing him like you always would. His left hand weakly held the phone to his ear, his body becoming overwhelmed with the pleasure as he touched himself.
“Tom,” you call out. “I’m going to hang up.”
“N-No, wait,” he breathed, coming back to his senses, though his hand still continued to move on himself. “I, hngh, still want to talk…”
“Are you okay?” You ask, still confused with what was going on with Tom on the other line. He sounded so uneasy and weak. Your mind was still too tired to comprehend, but his talking concerned you a little. “Are you sick? You sound a little bit weak…”
“Mmh, yes, Süße , I’m fine,” Tom spoke, though his words were starting to sound a little slurred. He bit his lower lip harshly, his hand going a little harsher on his aching cock, the tip leakimg of pre-cum. Tom’s hips involuntarily jerked into his palm, his eyes squeezed shut as he tried to stifle his moans that threatened to spill.
“Well then what did you call me for? If you wanted to talk you could’ve talked to me in the morning,” you then say, rubbing one of your eyes with the back of your hand tiredly. “You know how inconvenient you’re being right now?”
“Y-Yes, but, nghh..fuck—” he groaned, his hips bucking into his hand once more, his cock desperate for release. He could barely answer; his mind was in a daze, and he just wanted to hear you talk so he could relieve himself from the painful erection he was experiencing. Tom wasn’t trying to make it obvious, but he couldn’t help himself.
“Tom,” you call out, your suspicions growing, though at the same time you didn’t think much, since you were still tired. “What’s going on with you?”
"Nothing," Tom replied quickly, grunting through his orgasm as his hand worked furiously against himself. “I just needed someone to—mmh…” As much as he wanted to be discreet about his arousal, he kept getting interrupted by a wave of pleasure crashing over his body.
“Tom, just talk,” you sigh.
“Fuck—” he whimpered softly, his bottom lip bleeding from the harsh biting. Tom’s eyes rolled in from the pleasure, the back of his head burying deep into the pillow that he lay on unable to contain his arousal. “P-Please, keep talking, mmh, sweetheart, please…” he begged, his voice strained.
“I don’t know what you want me to say,” you groaned, not in the mood to entertain what he wanted you to do. That groan you made only increased Tom’s pleasure. You could hear his small grunts and tiny whines through the call, and for some reason you still thought he was suffering an illness or something. Your mind was still half asleep.
“T-Tell me, ngh–about–mmh–s-something nice…” he said, trying to keep his voice somewhat even, though whimpers and moans kept slipping through his sentences. He couldn’t control himself properly. His eyes rolled in again, his hand moving faster onto his needy cock, aching for release. He was so close.
“Well, um…” you say, rubbing your tired eyes once again. “I…made you happy the other day ‘cause I sent you…pictures of myself?”
“Mmh—fuck, yeah,” he whimpered, “Mhm, mhm, your pictures,” muttered, the images of you flashing through his mind as he stroked himself harder. “Hngh, y-you’re so perfect, sweetheart…”
“Thanks?” You say, a small yawn escaping your lips right after. “...Look, Tom, I’m really tired—”
“N-No, wait—” he gasped, his head thrashed back deep into the pillow under his head, his breaths ragged. “Say something to me. Say something good about me. I want to hear it from you,” he pleaded.
“Um,” you pause to think, just giving into what he wanted so you could end the call soon. “You’re really good to me, and…you’re very good-looking.”
Tom’s breath hitched at your words. He imagined you praising him that way. It turned him on even more. “M-More,” he whimpered softly, “...tell me more…”
You sigh. “You’re very good at lots of things, Tom. And that makes me happy.”
That was enough to send Tom over the edge. With a few more rough strokes, he immediately came, his hips jerking involuntarily as his orgasm crashed over his body. He finally gave up and let out a moan from the pleasure, one that had been stuck in his throat threatening to spill. “Fuck–mmh…” he breathed, his mouth slightly agape as his body shuddered with his release.
Your eyes widen at the noise. “What the fuck, Tom?” You say, your body finally sitting up in a more straight position now.
Tom’s mind was still in a daze, but the moment you spoke again, he snapped from his thoughts. “Shit, um—” he abruptly spoke, his hand moving away from his length as he recovered from his orgasm. “L-Look, I gotta go. Goodnight, love .” His breaths were still unstable.
“Don’t hang up on me, Tom,” you warn. “What were you doing?” Your mind had become much more alerted now, and you were curious.
“Goodnight, love,” he repeated, drawling. He was trying to avoid the situation, but it was way too obvious now. “Were you jerking off?” You ask, and he quickly answered with a defensive, “No I wasn’t!”
“Jerking off to my voice, Tom? Really? At 2 a.m?” You giggle, and he was silent on the other end for a while. “N-No…” he mumbled, and you broke out in laughter.
“It wouldn’t go away! It was painful, too,” he said, embarassment washing all over him. “Stop fucking laughing!”
You calm down, but your face was pink, blushing at the thought of him doing that to himself to your voice. “Did you finish at least?” You ask, and there was a little bit of silence before he responded. “Yes….” He answered hesitantly, his tone laced with embarassment.
“Come over,” you say. “I’ll give you the real thing, if you want.
Tom’s eyes widened, his cock twitching at your invitation. "Fuck, are you serious? It’s really late." Tom felt himself hardening again, hoping you were actually serious. “Mhm,” you respond.
He took a deep breath, trying to regain some semblance of control. "Give me 10 minutes.”
And the both of you hung up.
glossary corner!! : Süße (sweetie/ sweetness, in German.)
#tokio hotel#boyfriend#love#tom kaulitz#smut#tom kaulitz smut#tokio hotel smut#tom kaulitz x reader#tokio hotel x reader
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i was using Spotify and I realized how u could see what ur friends are listening to atm on there and it would be so fun to have hotch discover this, and be surprised that the reader is listening to songs like “or nah” or j any explicit songs like that and is into it😋 could lead into something more like playing that song while they’re doing it later on
OKAY THANK YOU LOVE UR WRITING!!!
i love you! i just left this vague and open to whatever song you want to insert!
this post is 18+, minors dni.
Being Spotify friends with Aaron Hotchner only came about because of Penelope's insistence on team bonding. And because she wanted to send everyone the personalized playlists she'd made for them, and sharing became much easier that way.
All it's yielded for you is the knowledge that, very infrequently, Hotch remembers he has a music app on his phone, and that he plays 2-3 Beatles songs before he inevitably gets called to another task and has to shut off the music.
Aaron is even less frequently informed of your tastes in music than you are of his, because the few times that he's used the app, he forgets to check what the other members of the team are listening to. Not that he really cares; Spencer's listening to classical and Derek has too-loud EDM playing in his headphones that Savannah teases him for. Rossi prefers records to his phone, and JJ plays mainly kids' songs for her boys. Emily is always listening to some mid-2000's rock song, but you, you he hasn't gotten a read on. You're all over the place, switching from singer to singer, genre to genre, language to language. All in all, his team's music taste doesn't affect him, but Penelope is far more eager to snoop on you all than he is.
"Ooh, nasty girl," She gushes, head bent to look at her phone as she waits in Aaron's office. He'd instructed her to let him have five minutes to finish a report before she briefed him on a new case's details, but she's proving very distracting. With a glance up at her, half-scathing, half-incredulous, he asks, 'What?'
"Oh! Y/N's Spotify," She holds out her phone as explanation, showcasing your profile with unfamiliar album art displayed over it. It's black and red, but Aaron doesn't recognize the song or the artist.
He raises an eyebrow at Penelope, and she huffily gives into his demand.
"It's a song about sex," She informs him, "Like- feral, sweaty, hungry, clawing-at-the-sheets, scratching-up-his-back, mouth-open-so-he-"
"Alright! Enough," Hotch snaps, glaring disapprovingly at her rather vulgar language, "I think I get the picture, Garcia."
"Sorry, sir." She looks only mildly sheepish, talking more to herself than she is to him as she muses, "Didn't know she was into that kind of thing."
Aaron doesn't think about the title of the song again until well after Penelope's gone, and he's taking his lunch alone in his office. He's more a fan of songs that, if they are about sex, don't outwardly mention any vulgarity, and he's not sure if he could handle explicit material being spewed at loud volumes directly into his ear. Call it morbid curiosity, call it Disapproving Boss Syndrome, but he fishes near-new headphones out of his desk drawer to find out what you've been listening to while filling out government paperwork all day.
He has the good sense to look it up on youtube without logging in. He doesn't want this attached to him in any way, and he certainly doesn't want eagle-eyed Penelope catching him on Spotify.
The beginning of the song seizes the ear right away, a unique beat that definitely doesn't sound sexually appealing. But when each different instrument filters in and the lyrics begin, he realizes that Penelope's description was not very far off.
It's filthy.
It's twenty kinds of vulgar, words that he's never even heard before being used to refer to genitalia. The only way he figures out their definitions is through context, and he thinks he may have been better off without knowing them. He's floored by the contents of the song; he knows sexual songs exist, even at this level of vulgarity, but he'd have never expected you to indulge in them. Certainly not in the workplace.
The song finishes out at three minutes and nine seconds, and Hotch feels a slight heat to his face as he unplugs his headphones and closes the tab. No one had caught him, but he feels mortified anyways, and decides he no longer has an appetite.
He puts the lid back onto the container of leftover pasta that he'd brought from home, keeping his head down as he treks to the kitchenette to refrigerate it.
Of course, his luck fails him as he nearly bumps into you, rounding the corner to the small, closed-off kitchen and finding you in front of the microwave in the doorway.
"Oh! Sorry, Hotch." You laugh, stepping out of his way to let him through. He notices an earbud in your ear and pushes away the knowledge of what song you're probably listening to, heading for the fridge instead.
"It's fine." He grumbles, electing to stay silent for the rest of your impromptu meeting if he can manage. He feels slightly guilty for being cold towards you, because it was his own curiosity that led to his embarrassment, but he can't look you in the eyes right now.
You see fit to fill the awkward silence with the tapping of your nails on the counter, and with a jolt of recognition, and something else far more intense below the belt, he realizes that you're tapping out the beat of the song.
He ignores your sharp gasp as he slams the refrigerator door perhaps a tad too hard. He doesn't have time to feel bad about startling you, though, not when he so desperately needs to be back in the confines of his office, away from the prying eyes of the team.
His sharp memory comes in handy as he calls upon the name of the song later that night, pretending to himself that he's only doing it because it's been stuck in his head. Not because every time he thinks of it, or rather, of you listening to it, his pants tighten slightly. He chooses youtube first, but something drags his thumb towards the spotify button instead, and he swallows the saliva that's suddenly pooled in his mouth when his suspicions are confirmed: you're listening to it, too.
At eleven-thirty at night, probably beneath the covers on your bed just like Aaron is, you're listening to a song about sex, and as he sinks a hand beneath the waistband of his pajama pants, he knows without a doubt that you're doing the same.
#aaron hotchner x reader#aaron hotchner imagine#aaron hotchner scenario#aaron hotchner oneshot#aaron hotchner one-shot#aaron hotchner one shot#aaron hotchner headcanons#aaron hotchner headcanon#aaron hotchner hc#aaron hotchner hcs#aaron hotchner fanfiction#aaron hotchner fanfic#aaron hotchner fic#aaron hotchner blurb#aaron hotchner drabble#aaron hotchner dialogue#aaron hotchner fluff#aaron hotchner x reader fanfiction
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Hazbin Hotel: Let's Talk About Cursing!
Trigger warning for lots of cursing in this post (obviously) and discussion of canon abuse scenes
As I delve further into the Hazbin Hotel fandom, I’ve inevitably come across a variety of people who dislike the show for an equal variety of reasons. One criticism I’ve seen with some consistency is in regards to the cursing and yeah, I get it. That’s not going to be everyone’s cup of tea. However, the repeated claim that the cursing is only there as a—failed—attempt at bad, lazy humor got me thinking about why I personally liked the cursing, and why I think it serves a greater purpose in the show.
Now yes, some of the cursing does function as an arguably simplistic joke. The most common setup I’ve noticed is one that leans into a contrast in tone/personalities. We see this a lot with the polite, comparatively timid Charlie as she navigates her distinctly vulgar domain.
Charlie: “Hi, mister!” Demon: “Go fuck yourself!”
The entirety of “Happy Day in Hell” plays with this contrast, setting up Charlie’s slightly skewed, but significantly optimistic perspective of Hell. We are shown again and again how her lyrics are contradicted or twisted into something less innocent through the visuals: a “revealing” street where it’s “hard not to stare” has BDSM going on in a nearby window, Charlie will “open the door” for her people and then literally does so... for a guy who’s already dead. (Or, you know, temporarily out of commission until he heals, or whatever demons do when they’re ‘killed’ by things other than angelic steel.) The entire point here is to contrast the happy, skipping girl claiming that there’s a “warm, fuzzy feeling” in the air with the actual environment of unchecked fires and decaying limbs. And yes, that can be amusing. Not necessarily for everyone as humor is highly subjective and dependent on context, but distilling this contrast down to the shock of a polite greeting getting a “Go fuck yourself!” in response is a kind of entertainment. Especially when Charlie’s reaction adds another layer: for me that’s a very funny—and currently relatable—expression.
We can potentially make the case that this humor format overstays its welcome, but I personally think the show does a good job of keeping Charlie’s cursing both simple and comparatively rare, so that when she is put into these contrast situations the humor lands better. The best example I can think of in the latter half of the show is Susan. There we get the whiplash of polite, trying-to-get-these-people-to-like-her Charlie reaching a breaking point to become “FUCK YOU, YOU OLD BITCH” Charlie. It’s a moment that builds off of the earlier surprise of the courteous Alastor calling someone an “Ornery old bitch”—while Rosie is trying (and failing) to find a nicer way to phrase this.
However, as stated above I think the cursing serves more of a purpose than to just be funny for (some) viewers. Beyond those who simply find cursing distasteful, I’ve seen a fair bit of, “This is so stupid. No one even talks like that!” going around.
Except... I do? I talk like that.
See, I like cursing. I was born to former hippie parents and grew up playing MMOs, so cursing was something I became pretty acclimated to. Personally, I’m glad I was because I’m fascinated by language and cursing—for better or worse—is an integral way that many people communicate. I was taught to see cursing not as the Bad Forbidden Thing You Must Never Ever Do, but rather as just another form of expression, something to be used in moderation and under specific circumstances. Once I became an adult I already understood how I wanted to curse and when it was appropriate to do so. People at work are often shocked when I tell them I curse a lot because no, of course I’m not doing that at my job. That isn't considered professional in this space. Among my friends though?
We can sound a lot like the Hazbin crew.
Undoubtedly the most common curse in the show is “fuck” and its variations, which very much tracks with my personal experience among other people who curse. In fact, it’s so ubiquitous that it barely counts as a curse at all in some groups. It’s more of an easy, accepted way to add emphasis. Vaggie’s “What the fuck was that?” about Alastor’s commercial is a perfect example. She’s pissed and simply saying “What was that?” doesn’t carry the same weight, no matter how angry she may sound when she says it. Vox’s long “Fuuuuuuuck” at the end of “Stayed Gone” conveys an emotion you just can’t capture any other way. No dialogue at all would create a fundamentally different experience of Vox’s feelings and another non-cursing response is just gonna hit different. Not necessarily bad, just different.
“I don’t want to go to the party!” “I don’t want to go to the freaking party!” “I don’t want to go to the fucking party!”
The above represents three distinct characters to me and I think Hazbin Hotel gets that. Cursing isn’t thrown around randomly because something something cursing supposedly sells; it’s all linguistically logical. Characters curse when something surprising or bad happens, or when something unexpectedly good happens, when they’re angry, trying to be sexy, or they want to add that emphasis. That’s a lot of different situations where cursing can be useful and when you use “fuck” in your daily life a lot you become pretty desensitized to it. As said, for many it’s barely a curse at all. Which means that when you really want to curse you’ve got to up the ante. It doesn’t surprise me one bit that the two uses of “cunt” I can recall—a word that is generally considered far worse than “fuck” and makes a lot of people understandably uncomfortable—is used by two of the worst characters in moments that are meant to horrify the viewer:
Adam: “Can’t wait a whole year to slaughter those little cunts / I know it’s just been a week, but we’ll be back in six months!” Valentino: “When I say you’d better get that fucking cunt out of my studio, you say...?”
This horror is especially emphasized in Valentino’s scene. The creators know this word is coming up and deliberately build towards it. Angel is currently being abused and has been reminded that Valentino “owns” him. The above question is a part of a trio that Valentino asks (a standard structure in writing), wherein the third option is the outlier/most shocking of the three. The animation leans into that shock, with the music building and Valentino grabbing Angel to pull him close right on the word “cunt.” Perez even puts emphasis there because he knows that this is a significant word that will change our understanding of Valentino.
Despite having hit Angel multiple times and taunting him with the contract, this is the moment Valentino stops playing the ‘nice’ employer. This is the real him. No more fake compliments and endearments aimed at Charlie, no more fake comfort/intimacy aimed at Angel. That “cunt” conveys a hell of a lot about how Valentino really sees them and when you have a cast of characters who are already cursing on the regular, it takes a word on that level to do that kind of work. If Valentino had said, “get that fucking bitch out of my studio” it wouldn’t have had nearly the same impact because he’s the kind of guy who uses "bitch" even when playing ‘nice.’
Adam’s line from “Hell is Forever” does very similar work. The scene needs a word to align with the horrific reveal that another extermination is just six months away, that conveys Adam’s deep disgust for Charlie’s people, and that still catches the viewer’s attention even though he’s the character (I believe) who curses the most. Here the music drops and Adam is a little closer to speaking than singing; there's this shift because, like with Valentino, our perception of him is shifting. This isn’t just some egotistical idiot who wants to be called “Dick Master,” he’s the leader of an army coming to gleefully kill them. Framing a whole world of people—people Charlie loves—as “cunts” while treating their murder as a holiday that can’t come soon enough creates an, 'Oh shit. This guy is actually a threat' understanding that you can’t quite get with anything else.
On a smaller scale, cursing does other character work throughout the whole show. I watched a number of cursing compilation vids for this meta (that was a trip lol) and again, cursing is not thrown in randomly. Each character has a unique way of cursing that aligns with their personality and motivations:
As said, Adam curses the most in the show which helps sell his truly over-the-top, irreverent personality. Linguistically, the amount he curses also allows for some fun grammatical play. Lines like, “Fucking love putting my name on shit, shit’s the best!” help convey the versatility of cursing.
Also as said, Charlie curses a fair bit but she’s comparatively polite and her cursing tends to be a result of genuinely big emotions—like saying “Crap” when she’s shocked and falls, or “Shit!” when Adam locks her out of the room—rather than sprinkled into her conversations as a modifier. That leaves space to create those moments of amused surprise when Charlie really let’s loose.
Sr Pentious curses even less than Charlie which fits his secretly gooey center. He talks a big game at the start of the show, but he’s actually quite bad at being, well, bad (especially the Amazon version compared to pilot!Pentious). His idea of getting one over on Alastor is ripping a bit of his coat. He loves his Egg Bois and “doesn’t want to live” without them. He has no desire to go into battle without minions/a big machine to hide behind and, of course, he’s the first to be redeemed. He's too much of a secret sweetheart to curse a lot.
Interestingly, Niffty doesn’t seem to curse at all. At least, not enough for me to think of examples off the top of my head. Right now I’m inclined to read that as an extension of her lived experiences/design—the cute 1950’s housewife archetype who is obsessed with keeping things clean doesn’t [gasp!] curse—as well as a way to maintain her legitimate creep factor. As said, cursing is common among the hotel residents and is a way for them to linguistically fit in. Niffty, however, is positioned more as an outsider (despite how much they all obviously love her): she’s actually scary in a way most demons aren’t and despite how weird this whole world is, she stands out as someone no one else can make sense of (even Alastor). If cursing is normal, Niffty is a character who is decidedly positioned as not normal.
Angel curses a fair bit, though his irreverence is conveyed more through innuendos. Angel is great at verbally twisting others’ words (especially Husk’s) to give himself a conversational advantage:
Husk: “Go fuck yourself” Angel: “Only if you watch me~”
Husk: “You’ve come—” Angel: [very loud orgasm noise] Husk: “...to the right place.”
Meanwhile, Husk uses “fuck” plenty, but he’s also one of the few characters who use “bullshit" too. I wouldn’t say there’s anything particularly revealing about that choice, but just giving him a go-to curse that’s otherwise used infrequently helps make his character distinct in a cast of other cursing characters.
Vaggie occasionally curses in Spanish, showing us her heritage if she used to be human, or a distinct knowledge/verbal preference if she’s always been an angel.
Heaven, as the ‘good’ side, doesn’t curse as a general rule, which leaves room for cursing to do more of that silent character work. We’re reminded of the stuffy, overly critical beings she’s dealing with when Charlie receives the combined judgement of the court for saying, “Fuck yeah!” In contrast, we understand just how shocked St. Peter is to see a Morningstar when he lets out an unintentional “Fuck!” The angry vindication of Charlie’s “That’s what the fuck I’ve been saying!” lands harder after multiple scenes of very little cursing, and Lute’s “Some crack-whore who fucked up already? / He blew his shot like the cocks in his mouth—” helps set her apart as an exorcist + Adam's second in command: her shocking violence comes through in her word choice too; words that supposedly don't belong in Heaven.
In what’s arguably the funniest line in the whole show, Lucifer undermines his dramatic standoff with Adam by going, “You mess with my daughter and now I’m going to fuck you.” Beyond just cutting the tension, that fits his bumbling, oblivious personality perfectly. Lucifer is crazy powerful and can absolutely wreck Adam. He also has none of the classy intimidation that, say, Alastor displays when he tries to convey that. This is a depressed himbo who makes ducks in his free time and settles on, “Hey, bitch!” when greeting his estranged daughter. Of course he’s going to accidentally turn a threat into a promise of sex.
Which finally brings me to Alastor, someone whose cursing is already understood well by the fandom. He’s characterized as manipulatively courteous, using manners to both hide his true nature and draw attention to his power—’You’re so beneath me I’ll just calmly sip my coffee and politely ask who you are, despite the fact that we've fought multiple times.’ This is a guy who calls people “My dear” and unironically insults them with the phrase “wacky nonsense.” So when he curses you can BET it’s gonna have an impact. It sure did for me. I had to pause the episode after Alastor’s first “Fuck you” because it was so shocking to hear that language from him. And that’s the point! The scene wants that reaction from the audience. The "Fuck you"s visceral anger contrasting the fake laughs he and Lucifer have been giving, the quick-fire exchange that’s suddenly cut short by Alastor’s choice of a direct insult, the fact that he’s officially dropping the polite veneer they’ve both been indulging in and raising the stakes before Charlie intervenes, the loss of the radio filter that otherwise demonstrates his control over a situation... all of it screams, ‘THIS IS AN IMPORTANT CHARACTER MOMENT.’
"Fuck you” reveals that, for the first time in the show, Alastor is legitimately threatened by someone. Which makes sense given that, you know, Lucifer is the King of Hell. Cursing for Alastor isn’t normal, so when he does curse it’s going to reveal something about a guy who otherwise is obsessed with being unknowable. Having the King of Hell dismiss him is actually infuriating in a way Sir Pentious’ threats could never be and the exchange kicks off a rivalry that rattles Alastor in ways Vox’s never has. (Side note: is it any wonder people ship them? Character A making control freak Character B feel vulnerable is classic!) It’s no surprise to me than that the one other true curse we get from Alastor is, “I’m about to end your fucking life,” delivered to Adam who, like Lucifer, poses a legitimate threat and does end up beating him. I say “true” curse because calling Susan a “bitch” does similar work for him, but the takeaway is humorous rather than dramatic. It’s funny that the only people who can piss Alastor off enough to curse are the First Man/a powerful exorcist angel threatening his life, the literal King of Hell... and Susan.
So there’s a lot going on here, more than what many viewers might assume if they approach the show as just “stupid,” needlessly vulgar entertainment. As shown above, I don’t think the cursing is needless, especially given that, well... they’re in Hell. They’re sinners, supposedly the worst that humanity has to offer, so of course they're going to curse a lot. Does cursing mean you’re a bad person? No. Can you craft a hellish world that doesn't rely on cursing to convey a group's immoral nature? Sure.
Does it make sense that a writer would equate a sinful, irreverent cast with linguistic rebellion and would want to convey a certain vibe that, frankly, you just can’t get without dropping an F bomb?
Yeah, I think so. No one has to like that kind of creative decision, but it’s worth acknowledging it as a deliberate choice.
That’s all! Thanks for reading this fucking long post ✌️
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✘ unrequited love
summary: loves echoes through the darkness, yet there's no light to erase it.
or
↝ they like you, you don't seem to share the bits of it.
context: unrequited love, angst no comfort, !!gn reader!!, angst and also angst, mention of blood, character: isagi, bachira, nagi, rin.
Isagi.y
he felt his heart break a bit, didn't shatter. just a little crack that made him lose his breathing track for a second.
he has to take a step back from you, to 'comprehend’ it, and by that he means living his ordinary road, just with a new layer of wretchedness. He really tried going on his old ways, yet his attempts were futile. He wouldn't utter a tune on breakfast with his family, his friends would ask him why he stuck to the mud all of a sudden, he would woolgather like there was a castle in the sky, in class, in practice to the locker room.
he would walk back home, stare at the mirror, and surveyed his features. fingers crossed his face, did he perhaps not fit the standards? more importantly, your standards? he does realize that he wasn't that much of an eye candy, but he definitely wasn't an eyesore either. did he look too basic? he’ve always been told that by his teammates一yet you always told him that they're just jealous that they don't carry the most splendid, navy blue pairs of eyes around really一god, he really missed you.
he tried, he really did try to connect the puzzle, solve it to get the idea out of your mind. laying in bed with his hands behind his head, his ceiling seems to be the most interesting thing to ever exist. Was he not your ideal type? you always told him that as long as heart remains genial, it’d be good enough. did his heart come out as ruthless? well, it's not like his behavior on the field is helping.
it took him a good long days to get it, this was not a game he could fathom in a blink, this was you. he can't change what you think of him, he can't force you to see him as the almighty devotion defines that he sees you as, he can't make you love him, as much as he wishes and prays to. for once, this isn't something that his ego could grasp on, even for his sake.
he asks you to be friends again, if you were kind enough to agree, he'd be willing to get on his knees, thanking what you had left of sympathy for him. even if life never came back like it used to, as long as you're by his side, it's not the end of the world just yet.
isagi could just wish, you’d somehow discern a new corner in your heart that’ll behold as a sense of love for him, for what he had of selfishness clinging onto him, for what he had of undying love for you.
Bachira.m
he really, lived and witnessed the world ending through his eyes and mostly his heart.
to put it mildly, bachira have always been out of place. to other people, he didn't seem to reach out of his weird spot he somehow earned. you were nice though, the nicest person he had ever met, you were his special place, and the safest of all. his favorite flower and the references to cross his brush over the pearly white papers. and with all the cheesiest in the world一his universe.
it was an unyielding thing to not catch feelings for you, his ever first friend that didn't feel ashamed when hearing his name beside yours, till he found himself wanting more than just that title, for you to be his better half sounded like a paradise blessing pouring on him.
there would be dreams where he'd finally get to press his lips against yours, it's too good to be true, the warmth and the dizziness, the sweet flavor against his lips was making his mind melt to a pool, made him heat up like he was standing above a low steam stone, he wanted more, till he'd fell unconscious in your arms from the lack of air, never ever wanting it to come to an end, yet I'll eventually burn to ashes.
he never hated you, he could never. even when you uttered the words of rejection that came like a keen pain right up his chest. it hurts, more than any punch, kick or insult he'd receive. his wheel of life seemed to diminish, and his eyes began to water.
a part of him knew this was coming, even when you became something of him, there will always be a sound whispering how inadequate he'll remain, no matter how he tries.
but hey, it's bachira. the same guy that’ll always look at the brightest side. above all, it's still love, yeah? even if you didn't return it, he was grateful that he somehow got to experience it, to pick raw flowers from the backyard with the biggest, lovesick smile glued to his face. to wake up everyday just to see you again was enough reason to leap off the bed. he was glad to say he for once, had a crush, coating the fact that his feelings got smashed to a wall. he was glad to feel any sense of true love.
your existence alone in his world was the definition of bliss, maybe he was sad because he wasn't in yours.
after all, you loving him back was too good to be true. being your friend should be an honor itself, he’ll keep on telling that to himself, till he finds the right extinguisher for the fire you lit up his heart.
Nagi. S
“sei.. I'm sorry, but I don't like you that way.”
“oh.” it was light, a tune of realization. In an instant, his eyes are empty again, the world blends to a hue of gray he knows the most, and suddenly sinking into a dreamless slumber for a whole day sounded like a brilliant idea.
“okay.” that's it, that's all he had to say before he's.. him again. he was nagi again, not the seishirou that fell smitten and starstruck, the one you made with your bare hands, the better version一the happiest version of himself.
he doesn't get a grasp on why he felt nothing at that moment, but at the same time he felt everything一it almost felt like he had an organ failure, but also his heart rate draw at halt. it was hard to put it on words一but what he knew, he definitely never, ever wants to experience anything like that again.
for the longest time, nagi always lends to your hand, interlocking his fingers with yours, it's been like this for the longest time. you and him, perhaps against the world一but really, it was more like you against the world while he immerse in your shadow.
he didn't mind. your light has always been overcasting. your smile was radiant, with your eyes aglow, he couldn't help but feel small. he was nothing against the brightest star to ablaze at him, and for the countless nights, he'd wondered一why him? nagi didn't exactly embrace the fact he was a slacker, he just tended to let it be this way, it was too much of a hassle to correct it一or maybe it was a truth that cannot be denied, who knows.
it was mostly his fault, for getting too used to you, for leaning on you like his own wheel of life. but he didn't want to let you go, it would be a pain一he was selfish after all.
nagi would slim down on your shoulder, he can feel your slightest tenseness. you were always comfortable, so comfortable that he could just be one with you.
“do you like me back yet?” he would ask, you say nothing. he’d inhale a soft sigh, snuggling onto you even more till his snowy locks kept on tickling the skin of your neck.
“that's okay, I'll stay here until you like me back.”
you again say nothing, but you’ll let him hold your hand, meshing your palms together. maybe he'll let go when his heart stops skipping a beat for you, or when the world comes to crumble, but they both end up with the same fate anyway, so it didn't really matter.
Rin.i
he knew he'll at some point regret this. wanting you of all people was a sin, a forbidden love.
despite his ears ringing, and his heart dropping to his core. he saw it coming, he would mutter that he'd be ready for it, just for it to sting like a sore thumb. it felt like he was collapsing on the ground with a pool of blood and tears, and all you’d do is watch with pity.
he felt bare, naked and exposed, he wanted to hide. he felt rejected and small. Suddenly he was fifteen again, pleading for his big brother to not leave him to rot in the cold, to not let the snow be the only source of comfort he had instead of a warm embrace.
for once, he had felt his heart swell with adoration一for a second, he didn't even have a name for that feeling, was was genuinely confident that you were making him somehow ill, there had to be a medical explanation for the mini heart attack he suffered from whenever he witnessed you at elation.
he allowed it to happen, he should've pushed you away more, he should've stood up his ground, he should've made more effort to strengthen his walls that you decayed with ease.
but what was there to wonder about the ‘what if's’ and the ‘maybe's’ yet again here he was, playing a secondary role in the ones he loved the most once again. digging his own grave stupidly.
for the first time in forever, he didn't feel like it was a challenge to love him, he didn't have to look at his reflection and grimace, he didn't have to be muddled by the name ‘itoshi sae’ this time, he was rin一your rin, was it bad that he wanted to live by that? it felt right to.
he knew he wasn't perfect, maybe even his flaws swamped over what he had of strengths. yet you seemed to admire him through it all, you looked at him like he was something一someone, he wanted to be that someone to you.
you managed to make everything look soft, feel warm. you stained his world with colors he thought he forgot the hues of it, he thinks he likes you a little too much.
for the longest time, rin was afraid he'll eat the life out of you, just like the maggots adore the flesh. seems like he was worried about nothing, because he’ll never be what he ought to be一yours.
you probably hate him, he did exclaimed hurtful things, he saw your eyes narrowing into a pained expression, it ached more than any rejection. he didn't know why, he was overwhelmed, angry and blinded by rage一and like the predictable itoshi he was. he revealed his cuspids and went for the throat.
he just wanted to hurt you back, that's what felt right at that moment. and yet as soon as he saw shedding tears running down your cheeks, satisfaction never came across, all he felt was a deep-seated regret. he felt ugly, sour and mean. and most of all, cruel.
and when rin sinks to his bed, he curls himself to a ball, hugging his knees to his chest. did his heart die already? or was he just too numb to feel anything at the moment? all he can sense is tiredness, so he closes his eyes to nothingness. where he dreams about you, with him in the summer breeze and cheap popsicles, and nothing bad happened to you and him.
sounds like a nice dream.
#blue lock x reader#bllk x reader#blue lock#isagi x reader#nagi x reader#rin x reader#bachira x reader#rin itoshi x reader#bachira meguru x reader#isagi yoichi x reader#nagi seishiro x reader
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Hi! I really liked and agreed with your post on purple prose, and I was curious what books if any you'd describe as having purple prose. Not even necessarily as shorthand for calling it bad! just examples of it, especially from non-classic literature. Unless the term is entirely subjective lol. Feel free to reply to this ask publicly or privately; I don't mind either way
Have some Conan the Barbarian (sorry about! the racism):
TORCHES flared murkily on the revels in the Maul, where the thieves of the east held carnival by night. In the Maul they could carouse and roar as they liked, for honest people shunned the quarters, and watchmen, well paid with stained coins, did not interfere with their sport. Along the crooked, unpaved streets with their heaps of refuse and sloppy puddles, drunken roisterers staggered, roaring. Steel glinted in the shadows where wolf preyed on wolf, and from the darkness rose the shrill laughter of women, and the sounds of scufflings and strugglings. Torchlight licked luridly from broken windows and wide-thrown doors, and out of those doors, stale smells of wine and rank sweaty bodies, clamor of drinking-jacks and fists hammered on rough tables, snatches of obscene songs, rushed like a blow in the face. In one of these dens merriment thundered to the low smoke- stained roof, where rascals gathered in every stage of rags and tatters—furtive cut-purses, leering kidnappers, quick- fingered thieves, swaggering bravoes with their wenches, strident-voiced women clad in tawdry finery. Native rogues were the dominant element—dark-skinned, dark-eyed Zamorians, with daggers at their girdles and guile in their hearts. But there were wolves of half a dozen outland nations there as well. There was a giant Hyperborean renegade, taciturn, dangerous, with a broadsword strapped to his great gaunt frame—for men wore steel openly in the Maul. There was a Shemitish counterfeiter, with his hook nose and curled blue-black beard. There was a bold- eyed Brythunian wench, sitting on the knee of a tawny-haired Gunderman—a wandering mercenary soldier, a deserter from some defeated army. And the fat gross rogue whose bawdy jests were causing all the shouts of mirth was a professional kidnapper come up from distant Koth to teach woman-stealing to Zamorians who were born with more knowledge of the art than he could ever attain.
Conan is an interesting example imo because it displays a lot of the highs and lows of pulp. Robert E. Howard could also write very punchy, straightforward action, and often did - but part of the selling point for the emerging genre fiction of the era was that it was lurid and lascivious. While the extract above is. Well. Bad. It is worth recognising that within its context it was also kind of experimental.
Howard wrote these drooling, sort of bewildering, sensory passages for the same reason Marvel movies punch you in the face with saturated colours and rapid cuts and a billion VFX. You see it in the work of H.P. Lovecraft too, and I will grudgingly acknowledge that that's something worth recognising about his literary impact. I also think Lovecraft was a pretty bad technical writer, personally, but that's a whole other soapbox.
My point is that a lot of truly purple prose today (in the sense that it is extraneous, distracting, undermines its own function) traces its legacy to this era of pulp where there was a distinct secondary purpose to overwhelming the reader with ornamentation. It was self-consciously indulgent, and strikingly distinct from the more genteel floridity of equally bad literary novelists. For instance, compare the above with the even purpler prose of the famously awful Irene Iddesleigh:
On being introduced to all those outside his present circle of acquaintance on this evening, and viewing the dazzling glow of splendour which shone, through spectacles of wonder, in all its glory, Sir John felt his past life but a dismal dream, brightened here and there with a crystal speck of sunshine that had partly hidden its gladdening rays of bright futurity until compelled to glitter with the daring effect they soon should produce. But there awaited his view another beam of life’s bright rays, who, on entering, last of all, commanded the minute attention of every one present—this was the beautiful Irene Iddesleigh. How the look of jealousy, combined with sarcasm, substituted those of love and bashfulness! How the titter of tainted mockery rang throughout the entire apartment, and could hardly fail to catch the ear of her whose queenly appearance occasioned it! These looks and taunts serving to convince Sir John of Nature’s fragile cloak which covers too often the image of indignation and false show, and seals within the breasts of honour and equality resolutions of an iron mould. On being introduced to Irene, Sir John concluded instantly, without instituting further inquiry, that this must be the original of the portrait so warmly admired by him. There she stood, an image of perfection and divine beauty, attired in a robe of richest snowy tint, relieved here and there by a few tiny sprigs of the most dainty maidenhair fern, without any ornaments whatever, save a diamond necklet of famous sparkling lustre and priceless value.
Christ. Hopefully you can see the depth of the scale here - the Conan extract is muddy and difficult to read, but this is near incomprehensible. Part of the reason this passage is so much worse is that there is even less intent behind the author's use of language. Here, she is working overtime to evoke a kind of dramatic-intellectual style borrowed from writers like the Brontë sisters (imo at least - not an expert, that's just the sense I get as a reader). The further these flourishes get from lending purpose to the meaning of the prose, the harder they are to parse.
BUT my other point is: far fewer writers these days set out to emulate Irene Iddesleigh's arch, roundabout, society conscious voice than they do the hallmarks of classic pulp. We're inured to sex and violence, sin and debauchery in fiction today, so extracts like the Conan example feel even more bloated than they did in their time. And that creates a real pitfall for amateur genre writers: the instinct to pay homage to the stylistic choices of the classics can lead them right into Irene Iddesleigh territory.
Too often, the purpose of these overwrought, leering descriptions isn't calculated to thrill the audience, but to establish a piece in the company of older works the writer admires. And that's what leads to truly purple prose in contemporary genre writing, which makes readers scoff and laugh, which makes authors self-conscious and timid, which leads us here to a point where wordy description is inaccurately identified as the problem. It's not. The problem is excess - and when something has purpose, by definition, it's not excessive.
#writing#this is all experience and opinion btw I'm not a literary theorist by any stretch of the imagination
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Ok, crowtorre? 10/10. THE 💣 💣 💣 😭 But omg how would he fair with a cat or wolf hybrid reader..
PLS
NOO he would be such a tease!! he’d be so mean!! im imagining cat hybrid reader (bc im biased lol) but LORD he’d be even more mischievous than usual, to the point where you go out of your way to avoid him at all cost if you get that feeling in your gut that tells u he’s going to be particularly annoying (he’s pissed you off so often you eventually developed a sort of sixth sense related to it. a headache radar, if you will)
(prev crowttore post for context)
cw: crow hybrid!dottore x afab!cat hybrid!reader. established relationship, he’s annoying, pure rambling from yours truly so barely even proof read. second half is nsfw, minors dni, scara mentionned once, rough sx, possessive behaviour, talks of breeding, overstim, smidge of aftercare.
“your reactions are entertaining” he’s told you once, his excuse whenever you shove him away from you. ever since then, you’ve tried to keep your reactions to a minimum. give him nothing more than a glare. but you fail. every single time. it’s not your fault he’s so good at reading people!! curse his big wrinkly brain
it’s not all that bad, though. sometimes he helps, like when you have knots in your shoulders he’ll gladly "preen" you and rid you of the pesky tension building up in your aching muscles with his nimble fingers. sometimes he even takes time to brush your tail for you; but that’s not something he does solely for your benefit. he’ll pluck out the fur that gets caught in the brush, and he'll use it for... something. you never asked, and you don’t really want to know (especially considering what he does to people on a regular basis)
but, at the end of the day, being with dottore is a chore at best. he can be a decent partner, but he, for some reason, makes it his mission to get on your nerves everyday. he’ll poke and prod at your ears and tail, “begging” you in a mocking tone to let him run tests on you. he’ll invade your personal space on purpose until you hiss and swat him away, only for him to grab your wrist and taunt you to “try harder than that”.
even if he doesn't go out of his way to irritate you, sometimes you'll just glance at him and get annoyed. maybe that was just a reflection of how little patience you had around him, though.
at this point you’ve lost count on how may times he’s run your patience to the ground (whether on purpose or not), but if there's one thing he's good at its pleasing you. he's smart (though calculating), dexterous, and observant. surely that means that he'll ditch the teasing and be a good boyfriend for you once you go through your monthly heats!
NO. LOUD INCORRECT BUZZER. WRONG!!!!
you'll be writhing in discomfort in his bed, tail all fluffed up and twitching, swiping at the sheets beneath you as you rut into his pillow. you're smearing slick all over the fabric, a mix of curses and whines slipping past your lips.
he refused to take the day off to take care of you when he saw the state you were in, saying something like "you're an adult, surely you can control your urges" with the same, sickly sweet smile he flashes at you whenever you pout at him. he even made sure to give you a kiss after he left your shared flat to go to his lab, something he never does.
and there you were. watching the clock tick, impatiently waiting for him to come home to replace the stupid toys that couldn't even drag one measly orgasm out of you. not a single one. all you could think about was him, him, him.
you could barely smell him on the pillow anymore, since all you smelled was how horribly horny you were. but as soon as you heard the front door open and the familiar sound of his boots stepping on the worn-out "welcome" mat, you swear you felt even more slick drip out of you (if that was even possible)
the second dottore steps into his room and he's at arms length, you grab onto his sleeve and tug him closer. unfortunately for you, your muscles are considerably weaker than usual and you don't even get to move him even an inch closer to you.
he revels in the whines that leave you and in your discomfort. he's both the best and worst person to take care of your heat; he knows what he's doing, sure, but he also knows exactly what to do to keep you right on the edge. both with actions and words.
"why would I help you with you heat, darling? don't you need a fellow feline hybrid to help you?" he coos, slipping his coat off of his shoulders, making you all but drool at the sight of the harness hugging his firm torso.
"no. no, fuck you, i need you," you whine, a pout tugging at your lips as you take in a deep breath to steady yourself. he just smiles, bending down to your level to cup your face in his soft, feathery hands to speak to you in that condescending tone he always uses this time of the month. "want me to call the balladeer to take care of you? i'm sure he'll be delighted to blow off some steam. and he'll be helping you, too! don't you want that? to have his cat cock drilling into you?"
when you scowl, tail whipping against the bed with dull thumps, he grins. of course he would never hand you off to his coworker, he doesn't trust any of the harbingers around you when you're in heat anyways. dottore knows only he can quench your insatiable thirst, but he adores hearing it from you. hearing you whine and beg for his touch, for his cock gives him an ego boost- makes that primal, possessive part of him coo in delight.
and when he finally touches you, black nails scraping against your sticky, sweaty skin, you swear you almost cum on the spot. it would have been embarrassing if it wasn't for the fact that you had been on edge the entire day. at least he was kind enough to make you cum properly with his fingers one time to rid you of that hunger for just a second, enough for him to get rid of his slacks to free his aching, hard cock from its confines.
seeing you beg for him fed his ego and, in turn, made his blood rush down to his second head, you really can’t blame him.
he manhandles you so easily it makes you throb with need, your first orgasm having faded away already, making you ache for him to pull another one out of you. and he would do so oh so graciously, pulling your ass back with a tug on the base of your tail, admiring the view of you on all fours just for him.
“ahh… i’ll never get tired of seeing you like this, waiting all nice and pretty for me. want me to fuck you nice and good, don’t you? breed you full of my seed?” he coos right into your ear, pulsing erection sliding up and down your wet folds, just barely dipping inside of your hole. you hiss, words failing you as you slip a hand between your legs to guide him inside.
and he lets you, smirking at the sight of his stubborn, headstrong partner reduced to a puddle of carnal need. you feel all nth inches of his hard cock fill you up and you cum hard, crying as you finally get what you had been craving for hours. his length all snug inside of you, letting you cockwarm him until the aftershocks of your climax fade and he can start moving in you, fucking you.
it would only be the beginning though, because he always made it his mission to “beat” your heat, so to speak. make you cum on his cock so much you would be pushing him away, weakly tapping his chest and clawing at his back as you plead for him to pull out.
you’ll be pinned to the bed on your stomach as he thrusts into you; sharp, hard plaps echoing in the bedroom over and over again, the bedsheets soaked with your juices and his seed. you can barely even think of running away, brain reduced to mush as he admires the way your ears seem to be glued down to your head, tail flicking weakly in time with his thrusts.
but when he finally takes pity on your poor sore and used cunt, he’ll rub soothing circles on your back as you purr quietly, satiated. for now. he doesn’t bother leaving the room to get a washcloth because he knows you’ll only claw at his arm, pull a few feathers out as a result, and look at him with those eyes that make him want to take you all over again.
he knows you’re tired though, if it wasn’t already obvious by the way you don’t even bother to untangle yourself from the soiled bedsheet you laid on. and he’ll gladly stay with you, keeping his wing spread out over you to keep you warm until you wake up and pounce on him for even more rounds.
#i have issues methinks#this was written with my pussy im sorry#the scara comment wasnt planned but now im thinking of writing something with him#the people (me) yearn for abo dynamics#୧ ‧₊˚rambling!#dottore x reader#dottore x you#dottore x afab reader#genshin x reader#genshin x you#dottore smut#genshin smut#cw omegaverse#just in case even
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I wanna know ur wallmark divorce headcannons so bad
okokok. i had to type these all up separately so i could organize my ideas. i have like more in my head but they're hard to put into words so this is what you get
cw for alchoholism and general relationship issues. putting it all under the cut. remember these are just my headcanons and thoughts, nothing concrete.
General issues
Conflicting ideals on future life- Wallter being much more of a city guy, while mark prefers a rural setting.
Communication issues- Instead of talking things out they get accusatory and defensive, which means most talks end up arguments.
Further communication issues- They geniunely cannot understand the other half of the time. Wallter will attempt to be subtle in his communication, dropping hints instead of just flat out saying what he wants. Mark cannot pick up on these. Mark's direct communication sometimes comes across as rude and aggressive to Wallter.
General conflict- They have some shared interests, but there's also a lot of things that are important to them that they don't agree on. Like building materials, however silly that might sound.
Mark's issues
Alcoholism- Bit of A drunkard. He insists it isn't an issue but it is when it interferes with plans he and Wallter already had. "It would be weird if I didn't have a few with the boys after a job well done!"
Short-tempered- Which causes even more arguments over small things. (Def not physically abusive toward Wallter, even when drunk)
Abrasive personality- Mark would be more likely to make jabs or meaner jokes because he thinks everyone can take it. He wouldn't understand why someone would get upset over a joke.
He snores really loud- To the point where Wallter usually can't sleep. It builds tensions between them cus either Wallter is sleep-deprived or they never sleep in the same bed.
Dismissive- Wallter will ask/tell him about something that bothers him or something he wants as a gift for a holiday, but Mark usually won't listen.
Oblivious- Won't pick up on hints that Wallter drops, no matter the context.
Wallter's issues
Grey stuff. Wallter loves it, Mark loathes it. They argue over it.
Petty- Incredibly petty. Will make snide comments at Mark when he's upset about something.
Silent- He doesn't help at all with the communication issue, because he just flat out won't say anything! Until it's a big issue, of course. He might make hints but Mark cannot pick up on them.
Insistent on his own opinions- He will often push Mark to think like he does, instead of accepting their differences. It gets frustrating for Mark when he's constantly having to defend his thoughts.
Pretentious- Would absolutely try and take the moral high ground during arguments. He thinks talking in a level tone and not shouting means he's in the right, when really he's the one instigating most of the arguments.
Jealousy- I think he'd be the jealous type. He'd interrogate Mark about his friends and question his honesty often.
~~
I don't think there was one thing that caused the divorce, but a buildup of tension and frustration over the years of their marriage that was never managed. i think they both wanted it to work, even afterward, but neither of them are willing enough to see their issues and work on them. Even then, they kind of ruined the idea of a life with one another because of how horribly their marriage ended.
anyway these are just my initial thoughts on the two. enjoy!
#labyanswering#regretevator#regretevator mannequin mark#mannequin mark regretevator#mannequin mark#wallter#regretevator wallter#wallter regretevator#regretevator headcanon#tw alchoholism#relationship issues#marital issues#arguing#wallmark
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Context: They're walking back to their shared dorm.
"Don't you worry what people think when they see you with me?"
This time the pull inside his gut wasn't as bad, still Bradley couldn't find it in himself to look at Max.
"You know", Max said. "I'm amazed every time I remember you managed to make an entire campus believe you're this untouchable ego-king." He cocked his head, looking at Bradley with caring eyes. "When in reality, you have pretty much no self-esteem."
Bradley kicked a pebble on the floor.
"If you only ever interact with people on a shallow basis, it's pretty easy to pretend", Bradley said with a shrug. "And before you, the only person I ever actually talked to was Tank."
"Well, then I consider myself honored to be one of the few people allowed to see your real self", Max said and the smile on his lips was so fond that it left no doubt he actually meant it.
Bradley didn’t deserve him.
"And to put your mind to rest," Max said, his thumb running along Bradley's palm again, sending shivers through his traitorous body. "If it was possible I'd let the whole world know that I am dating Bradley Uppercrust the third, and that I'm so, so very happy about the fact."
Bradley felt that fragile thing inside his chest again. His cheeks burned and he didn't try to hide it. There was a lump building in his throat, and Bradley swallowed it down. If it was just Max, maybe he'd let his emotions run free, but there was just no way he'd let a single tear slip when he was outside, in bright daylight.
"I'm very happy too", he said and his voice was barely audible even to his own ears.
Max’ smile was booming. He looked at Bradley like he was the most precious thing he'd ever seen.
The thought alone made his heart swell with unbearable warmth. The thought that Braldey might be precious to Max.
"Wait", Max said, eyes growing big. "I have an idea."
He abruptly stopped on the sidewalk, almost making a guy on a skateboard bump into them.
"Yo, watch your step!"
Max completely ignored him, instead looking at Bradley with wide eyes and a smile that told him he was up to no good.
"Max?", he asked, his voice wary.
"Two flies with one strike", Max blurted.
"What?"
"You're worried people will judge me for being with you, and you're scared people will realize you're a complete softie for me."
Bradley frowned. "Well, I wouldn't say it like that- "
"I'll proof to you that I don't give a fuck about what people think and draw all attention from you."
Max sounded more than excited now. Bradley was surprised he didn't see a tail wagging behind his back.
"Goof, I have no idea what you’re talking about", Bradley said, crossing his arms.
Max's smile only grew.
"See those people?", he asked.
They were close to the dorms now. There weren't as many people here as there had been by the main building, but it was the middle of the day and most students were on their way to lectures.
"I do", Bradley said, still lost on what Max was trying to tell him. "What about them?"
There was now a full-on grin on Max' face. "People won't even think of painting you the love-sick one when they see that I'm far worse."
"Wha- "
But it clicked.
If possible, Max’ grin grew even wider.
"Goof", Bradley warned. "Don't do something you'll regre- "
"Hey, everyone!", Max yelled, spinning around with his arms spread wide open.
Pretty much everyone within earshot turned at the sound of his booming voice. He was their golden boy after all.
"Max!", Bradley hissed, hiding half of his face behind one hand.
People even stopped on both sides of the sidewalk to listen to what Max had to say, smiles on their lips and curiosity in their eyes.
"I'm dating Bradley Uppercrust!", Max yelled and Bradley's heart did a painful jump inside his chest. "I'm down bad and I'm super happy!"
People's eyes went wide, a universal murmur filling the campus street.
"No", Braldey said, turning on his heel and power walking away from him.
He felt his heart thundering inside his chest, a mix of adrenalin and euphoria setting his insides alight. He couldn’t believe this was actually happening.
He heard Max laughing behind him, and then warm fingers wrapped around his wrist.
"Wait for me, Brad!", he called, giggling. "People will think I'm a liar."
"What are you doing!?", he hissed, and no matter how hard he tried he couldn't stop the corners of his mouth from rising.
"Telling everyone how down-bad for you I am", Max answered with the sun in his eyes.
"People will talk!" There was a quiver in his voice, he only barely contained the laughter bubbling up his chest.
"I sure hope they will", Max said, a giddy chuckle in his voice.
"You're mad", Bradley scolded, but no matter how hard he tried to contain it, he couldn't keep the giggle from his voice.
"Only because I wanna kiss you so bad right now", Max said with a dopey grin, his fingers pressing down around Bradley's hand.
Bradley blushed, almost stumbling as they walked towards the nearing dorms in hurried steps.
"You can kiss me all you want once we're back home again", Bradley said, almost feeling ashamed at his own boldness.
But no shame could fester inside his chest when Max looked at him like that. His warm brown eyes widened in surprise, his pupils slightly blown at Bradley's promise.
"Hurry up or I'll carry you", Max said, pulling Bradley along.
+
From chapter 10 of 'Good Luck, Babe!' on ao3.
#maxley fanfic#maxley#bradley x max#bradley uppercrust the third#bradley uppercrust#max x bradley#max goof#ao3fic#ao3 writer#ao3 author#an extremely goofy movie
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WIP excerpt from "Krypton lives and Kara did not sign up for this".
“Yes,” Kara says instead of anything about war crimes. She doesn't want to stress the kids out right now. Especially when they clearly don't have the context to understand what she's actually upset about, given what she knows of them so far.
“Why?” Match asks, still obviously incredulous. It might be the most expressiveness she's seen from him so far. That level of reservation is normal, coming from another Kryptonian that she’s just met. But Kal kept gushing excitedly about how emotive and expressive Earthlings are every time he called, so . . . is it actually that Match is reserved, or is it that he really just isn't feeling anything?
Or is he just that unwilling to show any trace of an actual personality?
There really isn’t a good option there, she’s pretty sure.
“Because I want you to like it,” Kara says. “So: sweet, savory, or spicy?”
“. . . uh,” Thirteen says as Match just stares at her like he thinks she’s sun-drunk. “Is the . . . ‘bai’ fruit the healthiest one, or . . . ?”
“It’s a dessert, kid,” Kara says. “None of them are ‘healthy’.”
Milk rice isn’t unhealthy, necessarily, but that’s not the point of a damn dessert, now is it.
“Uh,” Thirteen says, then looks . . . anxious, for a moment, before visibly drawing himself up and steeling himself to blurt: “Spicy.”
“Okay,” Kara says, envisioning backwater-planet war crimes before glancing to Match. “What about you, then? You like spicy?” Kal doesn’t, but Kal wasn’t built in a lab and raised on Earthling MRES.
Match just stares blankly at her, the corner of his jaw tightening.
Maybe she shouldn’t have phrased it as “like”, she thinks, and once again considers calling up Atrocitous with her ring size. No reason. Just because.
Two very specific reasons, actually, but also ten thousand reasons.
“There’s three of us,” Kara points out. “I can just make all three.”
“‘Dessert’ isn’t nutritionally useful,” Match says, his tone flat and expression bland. Thirteen half-eyes him, looking both restless and like he wants to say something. She’s still not sure how well they get along; still isn’t sure how to expect them to get along, especially once they’ve both settled in. Kal was not helpful on those grounds.
She’s also still not over how awkward both their dialects sound. Especially with the memory of Kal at their “age” so easy to revisit in her mind. He never looked or sounded a thing like either of them, even with the exact same face and voice. He definitely also didn’t have the muscle definition they do, which those bizarre tight outfits of theirs do absolutely nothing to conceal.
Kal could’ve at least gotten them an over-robe or two, for Rao’s sake. Fuck, five minutes off-planet and he loses all sense of decorum and rational thought. This is why no one wants his job! This! This is why!
. . . also the unsolicited cloning thing, she supposes. Also that.
Only Kal would manage to get his DNA stolen on a planet called “Earth”, of all the godsdamned places.
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Moon Dominance & Manipulation pt 3
I just keep finding more examples and I couldn't not share. They will vary in terms of the severity of abuse and manipulation. Some are quite silly but some are pretty fcked up. Salty Moon dominants who cannot stand being criticized, stay mad boo 😘you will never stop me from speaking my truth<3
One thing I have noticed about Moon dominant individuals is that they completely seem to believe the lies they tell others. They don't think they're being manipulative at the slightest because they fully believe everything they say, no matter how absurd or outlandish it is. This means that Moon dominants are easily influenced and can be manipulated easily even if they are also capable of blatantly manipulating and deceiving others. I see Moon dominants stuck in unhealthy relationships simply because they'll just play mind games with their partner until the day they die instead of just choosing peace.
Katrina Kaif, Hasta Moon
Katrina has lied about being half-Indian and half-white her entire career to be more "relatable" to Indians. no one knows who her father is or how exactly she grew up and how a British woman like her ended up modelling and acting in India at the age of 17. She's now one of the biggest stars in the country and to this day no one knows much about her background.
She is one of 8 siblings, all of whom are extremely white looking
it is possible that Katrina is mixed while her siblings are not but it's also possible that she just inherited a more olive complexion compared to her siblings??
this is a picture of Kat and some of her siblings as kids, this man vaguely looks like he could be POC but there are plenty of spicy white men who have darker features/hair & eye color?
if this is the father in question, his name is Ronald Turcotte (Katrina's birth name is Kate Turcotte, she "Indianized" her name to be Katrina Kaif when she made her debut 20+yrs ago) and this is a pic of him with his current wife:
He literally just looks like a regular white guy with some Italian ancestry or something.
Katrina has not only lied about being "half-Indian" but also said her father's name is Mohammad Kaif and that he was a Kashmiri businessman lmao
The producer of her first film who introduced her to Bollywood said:
"We created an identity for her. She was this pretty young English girl, and we gave her the Kashmiri father and thought of calling her Katrina Kazi. We thought we'd give her some kind of Indian ancestry, to connect with the audience ... But then we thought that Kazi sounded too ... religious? ... Mohammad Kaif was at the top, and so we said, Katrina Kaif sounds really great" (for context, Mohammad Kaif is the name of a well known cricketer)
She once said:
“Probably it may sound very stupid. You know you must have seen enough and your friends, how you have dark children who grew up to be fair. I was a very dark child so there was no way that you would look at me and say this is a Caucasian child. I was always viewed upon as oh how exotic or how ethnic."
Even Emily Ratajkowski is very non-white looking for a white woman, imagine if she started claiming that she "feels" ethnic as she "looks" ethnic.
Here are some excerpts from a 2011 interview:
The complicated politics of a tan skin white woman feeling validated by being comparatively light skinned in a deeply colorist country like India and lying about being half-Indian is just ..... 🤢🤮🤢
Bella Hadid- Hasta Sun
Bella, her brother and mother all suffer from a condition called "chronic Lyme disease". Gigi, the only person who does not have Lyme, has Hashimoto's disease.
Lets get a few things out of the way. Lyme disease is a real, entirely treatable and completely curable illness. All you have to do is take antibiotics and you'll make a full recovery in about 2 weeks.
Chronic Lyme disease is a different condition and widely debunked by the medical community for not being a real condition.
Wikipedia defines Chronic Lyme as:
"Chronic Lyme disease is the name used by some people with non-specific symptoms, such as fatigue, muscle pain, and cognitive dysfunction to refer to their condition, even if there is no evidence that they had Lyme disease."
That said, Bella and her mom have been talking about their struggles with Lyme disease for over a decade now. Medical professionals all deny the existence of this condition and both Bella and Yolanda (her mom) are treated by various quack, pseudoscientific "alternative" medicine practitioners who are more or less ill qualified and not real doctors.
When Bella was 16yrs old, she was arrested for driving under the influence and this was literally addressed on The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, the show that her mother starred in. Yolanda used to write a blog for Bravo in which she expressed her thoughts about this incident and she also mentioned writing a long letter to Bella.
Yolanda's dad died in a car accident when she was 7 and she was very frightened by Bella's accident but also relieved that neither she nor anybody else was injured.
That letter she wrote was somehow leaked and is available on the internet. Here it goes:
Interestingly enough, Bella was diagnosed with "chronic lyme" 👀in the same year. Bella once mentioned that she started smoking cigarettes at 14yrs old and clearly by 16 she was drunk driving with a cocktail of substances stashed in her car. Bella's old tumblr blog that has been widely circulated also reveals that she struggled with an eating disorder at this time and perhaps depression as well.
I mention all this because I have always suspected Bella of using "chronic lyme" as a cover up for her struggles with substance abuse and her eating disorder. Even all the symptoms for chronic lyme are so vague that pretty much anybody could experience them, but their occurrence is greatly exacerbated if one suffers from stress/anxiety/is abusing drugs etc (more on this in a minute).
In an interview, Bell said of her DUI:
"I stopped driving because I kept crashing, because my brain just stopped working.’ She had an accident — ‘It was when I first got sick. It was a dark time’ — which was reported in the press as a DUI. ‘I was exhausted all the time. It affected my memory so I suddenly wouldn’t remember how to drive to Santa Monica from Malibu where I lived. I couldn’t ride. I was just too sick. And I had to sell my horse because I couldn’t take care of it.’ It was an emotional blow on top of the physical."
Now the thing is, Yolanda mentioned in her own blog post that Bella went to AA (Alcoholics Anonymous) meetings as mandated by the court:
"I decided to take her phone away, make her pay for her own lawyer bills from her savings, and we sold her car. The court suspended her license for one year, she received six months probation, and was required to conduct 25 hours of community service and 20 hours of AA meetings."
She likely stopped driving because Yolanda got on her ass and sold her car lol?? As Yolanda herself said??? Yolanda never said one word about Lyme and she's pretty much the self-appointed spokesperson for Lyme so the fact that in her own blog post literally right after the accident, she addresses the issue for what it is makes Bella's later remarks of her being tOo siCk tO drIvE sound like a lie 🤥
This is an easy example of how Moon dominants manipulate the truth to suit their narrative and make themselves look better. Bella made her debut later that year and it would look bad if everyone saw Bella as a spoilt bratty nepo baby who was also a teenage alcoholic riding her sister's coattails into modelling. Also you have to remember, Bella was the less popular sister back then and she only became an icon and it girl by like 2019ish.
It suited Bella and later Yolanda to keep pushing the chronic lyme agenda to win sympathy.
Also just btw, I think Yolanda is super fucked up and this letter offers an interesting look into her mind. She is Uttarashada Sun and Jyeshta Moon and I think its sooo bizarre how her daughter almost died in a car crash and all she can talk about is how dirty and messy the car is??? Why isn't she talking about Bella being drunk out of her mind or about her alcohol habit in general??? Why is she not pointing out her actual concerning lifestyle instead of "oh my god youre soooo messy and im soooo sad" ??? anywayyys
Ever since then, chronic lyme has been Bella's go to to describe everything about herself. Symptoms that could easily be from stress, anxiety, depression, addiction, starving herself etc are all blamed on a non-existent condition. When actual doctors say the condition does not exist and you and your mom claim it does, I think it says something 😬
Also, Yolanda was sick during the filming of her reality show and it was found out that her breast implants had ruptured and the silicon was leaking into her bloodstream and making her sick. She later said it was Chronic Lyme instead lmfaooo. So there is plenty of proof that both mom and daughter are just making this shit up.
one thing I cannot stand about Moon dominants is how they constantly seek validation for everything they do and love to win sympathy. Meghan Markle, Hasta Moon is another example. Sympathy capitalist, Selena Gomez (Cancer stellium) is another example.
What exactly was Bella trying to prove by posting pictures of her looking very out of it?? To prove to people that she is indeed sick?? There are many celebs out there who struggle with chronic illnesses, are they posting pics from their treatment??? Overall, it feels very "🥺🥺poor me, im so grateful despite everything, im so strong, look at how much i suffer and struggle!!!" as if she's trying to downplay any privilege bashing she may get by counteracting it with a "im extremely sick" narrative bc no one can hate on someone who is ill even if that is a fictional illness.
There were rumours all of last year that she took a break from modelling to go to rehab and she had also broken up with her then bf.
look at those symptoms and tell me you haven't experienced those at some point lmao. I used to struggle with severe anxiety many years ago and an eating disorder several years ago and I experienced pretty much all of those symptoms. I say this because those symptoms by itself are really vague and not specific to any one illness.
another really sus issue is why Bella felt the need to post pics of her medical history??? like she's a model not running for President lmao,,,, its obvious that she really wants to be perceived as struggling with chronic lyme. Most people with a health issue stay quiet about it (their issues are also actual illnesses but oh well)
This is a screenshot of a lab test she posted:
A clinical lab scientist who performs tests on infectious diseases (like Lyme) said:
First off, having this amount and varied pathogens within your body at once is not impossible but is highly unusual. Even one of these pathogens would make a patient extraordinarily ill. If I were performing PCR and got that many positives, I would 100% not release results until a consult with an infectious disease MD.
In that list, there are bloodborne bacteria and viruses, intestinal parasites, many of which have nothing to do with Lyme disease.
That last page is important. The source states "urine". There are virtually no PCR tests performed on urine currently because pathogens are not usually shed through urine and often urine is contaminated by urogenital flora. This is the ARUP tickborne PCR panel which details out which pathogens would be tested for and the type of sample they would need (blood). ARUP is a large reference lab in the US and performs some rare tests. Again, it's extremely unlikely to see that many pathogens positive in one sample.
All of this is to say, Miss ma'am Bella Hadid faked her hospital records by paying some quack guy for it and put it on IG for sympathy 😬💀💀
I have nothing against Bella, I think she's iconic but her spreading literal medical misinformation to millions of impressionable people who eat up her every word is absolutely dangerous, unprofessional and awful and I sincerely hope she's called out/exposed for it.
first of all, none of these words mean absolutely anything.
"energy is in proper balance" ??? "alkaline tissue pH"? ?? just say you dont have a medical degree and goooo
On this document it says the test was conducted by 'Manhattan Advanced Medicine'.
Here is an excerpt from Manhattan Advanced Medicine's LinkedIn page:
Do they sound like legitimate doctors to you?? They're just one of those scammy New Age-y alternate medicine places that rich people with money to blow, go to, so they feel better about themselves.
I sincerely hope Bella gets actual treatment for her real struggles with mental health/ED/potential substance issues etc and I hope she has the strength to admit to herself that she's using a fictional narrative to gain sympathy from others and as a coping mechanism to avoid dealing with her real problems. Bella grew up as the middle child and felt neglected by Yolanda pretty much, some say that the whole "chronic Lyme" has probably become the only bonding activity for the two of them and the only time Bella felt like she was loved by her mom (which is so sad) which is why she's been going on with it for 10yrs now. Whatever it may be, I hope they all get better.
Elizabeth Holmes- Shravana Sun
Many of you are probably already familiar with scammer Liz Holmes
She was founder and CEO of Theranos, a blood-testing company.
Prosecutors accused Holmes of intentionally misleading investors and patients. Out of the more than 200 blood tests advertised, the in-house “Edison” machines could perform a very small number themselves and could not provide accurate results. Holmes is also alleged to have lied about the scale of the company's profits.
Two of the most striking examples of the Theranos machines’ faulty test results were two female patients. One of the women was diagnosed as HIV positive but the finding was refuted by further blood tests. A second woman who had suffered several miscarriages received test results from Theranos during her pregnancy which indicated that she had lost her baby once again. The test was faulty and she later gave birth to a healthy baby. Internal emails, however, revealed that the start-up concealed the erroneous results from investors and business partners by using a modified demo device or by partially hiding test results from them.
The prosecution also presented a 55-page report in which Theranos officials added the logos of pharmaceutical companies GlaxoSmithKline, Pfizer and Schering-Plough to give the impression that they had approved the technology. However, a scientist employed by Pfizer testified that he found the start-up’s claims to be implausible and advised Pfizer not to collaborate. The prosecutors were able to show that Theranos had nevertheless sent the report with the subsequently inserted logos to investors and business partners.
The interesting thing about Moon dominants and their manipulation is that unlike Saturn which is direct and in your face with how awful it is, Moon natives deceive and pretend. You will never realise the truth until you learn to look for it. With a Saturnian, you can always tell because they dont know how to hide it.
Moon does not have any light of its own. Moon also does not have a fixed form. Its waxing one day, waning the next. So it makes sense as to why these natives "manipulate" or "distort" the truth, since its kind of in their nature, to do so?
This brought me to an interesting observation of how Moon dominants seem to completely fall for pseudoscientific stuff. Bella, whom I already mentioned is one example but there are many more.
So, in Hinduism, the Moon God is named 'Soma' but the word 'Soma' is also used to refer to an intoxicating drink.
In the Vedas, the word Soma was actually primarily used for an intoxicating and energizing/healing plant drink and the deity could have received his name from the drink potentially?👀
The Hindu texts state that the Moon is lit and nourished by the Sun, and that it is Moon where the divine nectar of immortality resides.
In some Indian texts, Soma is the name of an apsara; alternatively it is the name of any medicinal concoction, or rice-water gruel, or heaven and sky, as well as the name of certain places of pilgrimage.
Whilst this connotation can explain their dizzying relationship with presenting the truth and how absolutely convinced they are of their own lies (Moon dominants manipulate others but are also easily manipulated tbh, they are both predator and prey). I think mythological backdrop also explains why so many Moon dominants are always kind of on the hunt for the elixir of life by adopting all kinds of New Age-y, holistic, spiritual 'alternative' medicine/lifestyle/treatment etc.
The thing is, there is truth to herbal remedies and holistic living but Moon dominants seldom pursue the truth of these practices, they always pick the weirdest, strangest stuff that absolutely helps no one and is most definitely a scam.
Gwyneth Paltrow- Hasta Sun & Mercury, Rohini Moon, Venus in Ashlesha atmakaraka
Lady Goop is a classic example of how Moon dominants can be very deluded with their "alternate" therapies/lifestyle. Moon dominants are easily confused and the path of wellness and spirituality is paved with many distractions to weed out the unworthy. Many get lost in this completely and mistake this Maya for the truth. Miss Gwyneth is one of them.
I have beef with this bc some of Goop's stuff is stupid but harmless (vagina candles, anyone?) but other times, she literally spreads dangerous medical advice to a very large audience (just like Bella).
On her website, she has an article about how to treat 'Candida' (a real condition which she has approached in a very pseudoscientific way). The symptoms, like Bella's, are vague, and include bloating, dandruff, sugar cravings, a bad memory and fatigue. Diagnosis includes something called a urine organix dysbiosis test (Bella's diagnosis also included a liver dysbiosis lmao) , while treatment involves limiting yourself to one piece of fruit a day and “overpowering the yeast” with anti-fungal supplements.
In 2017, Paltrow suggested women should insert a $66 egg shaped jade or rose quartz stone into their vagina to help “increase vaginal muscle tone, hormonal balance, and feminine energy in general.” Users were encouraged to thread dental floss through a purpose-built hole to help with releasing the egg. After facing backlash from gynaecologists over its dubious health claims and potential harmful results including toxic shock syndrome, Goop settled a $145,000 lawsuit for “unsubstantiated” marketing claims.
In Daoist sexual teachings, this is actually a legit practice but a white woman appropriating it and then selling it does not sit right with me :// and also its to be used along with a strict spiritual practice and has to be performed according to proper techniques. Obviously eastern spirituality is suuuper commercialized in the west and its reduced to sticking jade eggs up inside you and misses the very important context and tradition its rooted in and also sticking factory produced and probably chemically treated anything INSIDE U, is not a good idea??
A 2018 detox guide recommended an at-home coffee enema kit to stimulate users’ intestines from the comfort of their own home. A couple of years later, while hooked up to a vitamin drip on The Art of Being Well podcast, Paltrow revealed she had also “used ozone therapy, rectally,” a procedure which involves pumping oxygen via catheter into the colon. Scientists immediately dismissed Paltrow’s health claims.
In 2017, Goop suggested that anyone who wanted to “rebalance the energy frequency in our bodies” should try placing Body Vibes stickers on their arms or near their heart. The site claimed the stickers ($120 for a pack of 24) were “made with the same conductive carbon material Nasa uses to line space suits so they can monitor an astronaut’s vitals”. A fact that was quickly debunked when Nasa confirmed that they “do not have any conductive carbon material lining the spacesuits.”
There's a lot more but I'll stop here for now. Gwyneth is convinced of the validity of her claims and does not see anything wrong with it. This is how Moon dominants are and thats what makes their manipulation so damaging.
Andrew Huberman- Rohini Moon
He is a neuroscientist and wellness podcaster called "Goop for bros".
His protocols for good living involve things like taking enormous amounts of expensive supplements, ensuring you view early morning sunlight for 10-30 minutes after waking, carefully timing when you drink coffee and plunging yourself in ice baths. (probiotics and supplements are a complete scam, there are studies proving they do absolutely nothing for u)
He has covered everything from creativity to hair loss and despite having no professional expertise on all the things he covers, he acts like he does lmao
Huberman was exposed for taking steroids to achieve his body while he was promoting "wellness" and telling people to take cold showers and work out and eat clean etc lmao. He also reportedly earned millions from running adverts for dietary products and wellness supplements.
He went from science expert to guru. He used to have discussions of how the brain and body respond to certain stimuli but later extended that to broad prescriptions for lifestyle and dietary modification which he is not qualified to do??
Last month he was exposed for having 5 different girlfriends who all thought they were in an exclusive relationship with him.
Sarah, says she was in a relationship with Huberman for around three years, and had been undergoing IVF treatment to have a child with him when she found he had been having unprotected sex with at least five other women at the same time.
Her suspicions were aroused when she contracted a high-risk form of HPV, a sexually transmitted infection linked to cervical cancer, despite having been tested for ten years.
Along with Sarah, others known only as Eve, Mary, Alex, and an unknown fifth and potentially sixth, were all romantically associated with him - some having been led to believe they were exclusive for years. All believed that other exes in Huberman’s life had been “stalkers, alcoholics, and compulsive liars” according to the report. (Moon dominants manipulating the truth to suit them)
“I’m at the stage of life where I truly want to build a family,” he told Eve while he was reportedly involved with several others. “That’s a resounding theme for me.”
Yet, despite the reassuring words he appeared to be chronically unreliable disappearing for extended periods of time with no indication of his whereabouts.
For a man interested in promoting personal growth, he also appeared to be unapologetic about deceiving his therapists, of which he has had several over the years.
“We were at dinner once and he told me something personal, and I suggested he talk to his therapist,” shared Eve. “He laughed it off like that wasn’t ever going to happen, so I asked him if he lied to his therapist. He told me he did all the time.”
Despite his dismissal of therapy, the podcaster appears to have maximised the use of “therapy-speak” to familiarise himself with the internal experiences of many women.
“I hear you are saying you are angry and hurt,” he texted Sarah as she discovered journal entries about his infidelity. “I will hear you as much and as long as needed for us.”
“Your feelings matter,” he told Eve on a day when he had injected his girlfriend Sarah with hCG as part of their IVF treatment. “I’m actually very much a caretaker.”
Discussing sex addiction with another woman, Huberman denied he was a sex addict instead referring to himself as a “love addict”.
On one day in March, the women realised that Huberman had flown Mary thousands of miles from Texas to LA to stay with him in Topanga, California, some six-hour drive from where Sarah stayed in Berkeley. On that same day, he left Mary at home with his dog as he drove to a coffee shop to meet Eve to have a serious conversation about their relationship.
Anywayyys, thats enough about him. He's a cheating, conniving, manipulative asshole.
Oprah Winfrey- Shravana Sun
Oprah has used her platform to air dangerous pseudoscience for decades.
In 2007, The Oprah Winfrey Show, the no. 1 talk show for 23 consecutive seasons, welcomed former Playboy model and MTV host Jenny McCarthy.
The program gave McCarthy carte blanche to share a theory: that her son’s autism resulted from vaccines laced with hazardous chemicals. Despite a lack of concrete scientific evidence, McCarthy was lauded for her “warrior spirit” to speak up for other concerned moms. The lasting damage this has done to the country is concerning bc now it seems there are more antivaxxers than ever before.
The longest-reigning queen of daytime television promoted New Age scams, pushed unsustainable fad diets, and anointed problematic faith healers like John of God (now imprisoned) or pseudoscientific doctors like Dr. Oz. She sold us on magical thinking.
Indeed, before the “Goop-ification of wellness,” there was the “Oprah-fication of medicine.”
In the ‘80s, Oprah helped fuel the satanic ritual abuse / repressed memories panic by interviewing folks like the author of the later-debunked memoir Michelle Remembers. In the ‘90s, she had “women’s health expert” Christiane Northrup—a quack physician who spewed nonsense like thyroid dysfunction stems from women not speaking up enough (an “energy blockage”), that love can heal AIDS, and mammograms aren’t safe—on her show 12 times. In the early aughts, she promoted the feel-good gibberish that is The Secret, insinuating positive thoughts were all that separated you from success, riches, and yes, even medical recoveries.
And remember when Oprah notoriously hosted Suzanne Somers in 2009? The actress touted injecting hormones directly into one’s vagina to stave off aging and menopausal hot flashes, along with downing 40 supplements daily.
Like Gwyneth and Huberman, Oprah sold pseudoscience to millions of people who didnt know any better to make hugeeee profits. I am pretty sure Bella will follow suit and also set up a vitamin supplement business in the near future and it will probably also be her downfall.
Song JiA- Shravana Moon
She became extremely popular after her appearance on the show Single's Inferno and there are hundreds of videos trying to analyse why all the men on that show went ape for her lol
But she was exposed for wearing fake designer stuff lmao?? Koreans be wilding
Her career came to a standstill after that and she hasn't done much since.
Agatha Christie, Hasta Moon & Mercury, Jupiter in Shravana in 1h
aside from the fact that she wrote murder mystery books that were known for misleading the reader (a more fun manifestation of Moon's tendency to manipulate?) she also had some other tendencies:
On the evening of Friday 3 December 1926, Agatha Christie left her home in Sunningdale, Berkshire, got into her car and disappeared into the night. Her disappearance sparked a manhunt involving the police, members of the public and famous figures and was lapped up by the tabloid press.
In the aftermath of Agatha’s disappearance both Archie Christie (her husband) and his mistress Nancy Neale were under suspicion and a huge manhunt was undertaken by thousands of policemen and eager volunteers. A local lake known as the Silent Pool was also dredged in case life had imitated art and Agatha had met the same fate of one of her unfortunate characters. Famous faces also waded in to the mystery with the then Home Secretary William Joynson-Hicks putting pressure on police to find the writer, and fellow mystery writer Sir Arthur Conan Doyle seeking the help of a clairvoyant to find Agatha using one of her gloves as a guide.
She was found living at a hotel under the name Theresa Neale (yeah she used the mistresses' last name). She apparently did not recognise her husband when he went to see her at the hotel and they divorced not long after?
The nature of the Moon is ever shifting, watery , always projecting and I think its interesting how Agatha, who found out about the affair pulled that stunt to cope perhaps. I have noticed this with many Moon dominants, if they learn of something depressing, they will immediately distract themselves with something else and pretend that issue is more concerning??? Or they will pull a stunt and redirect everybody's attention there. They are veryyy image conscious, so this could be bc of that. After all, being remembered for her strange disappearance is better than being perceived as the woman he cheated on and left, I guess.
St Vincent- Hasta Sun & Mercury, Shravana Moon
This is kinda innocuous but she lied about being a Kate Bush fan lol??
What I mean by this is that she said two different things on Kate Bush and on how she was introduced. In 2007 she was interviewed with Pitchfork and said "this may sound really silly-- but I just discovered Kate Bush, probably six months ago, and I think she's so great. I know I'm very late to the party here [ laughs ], I know this is old news, but I got a Kate Bush record, and I forget-- I think "The Dreaming" is on it, though I'm spacing on the name of the record. [The Dreaming --Ed.] It has Kate Bush in this totally miraculous ascot, too, on the back [ laughs ]. She just went for it. It's so great. She totally went for it." (http://pitchfork.com/features/guest-lists/6680-st-vincent/)
Now that doesn't sound so bad on it's own, but in 2014 during the Kate Bush documentary she said a completely different story on how she got introduced to Kate Bush around 46:47 and said "I still remember going to the CD World and buying The Sensual World when I was sixteen. And the cover, there’s a rose in front of her mouth that has bloomed, she’s got big wide eyes. And I remember, you know, putting it in the shitty car stereo on the way home, and you know, my life was forever changed.” (https://youtu.be/c4sLwt8mhZs?t=46m49s)
Its the detailll thats giving Moon dominant manipulation lmao
Alfred Nobel- Shravana Moon
He is known for inventing dynamite as well as having bequeathed his fortune to establish the Nobel Prize. So now no one remembers him for being the horrible man he was lol.
He made millions selling explosives and then decided to manipulate his legacy as that of a philanthropist.
Mahatma Gandhi- Hasta Sun, Ashlesha Moon
In 1903, when Gandhi was in South Africa, he wrote that white people there should be "the predominating race." He also said black people "are troublesome, very dirty and live like animals."
Gandhi championed women in politics. But he was also obsessed with his own celibacy. In his late 70s, before he died at 78, he slept naked with his grandniece when she was in her late teens. He said he wanted to test his willpower to abstain from sex.
Gandhi denied life saving treatment to his wife. She was in bed, extremely sick from pneumonia and he refused to let the doctors administer her with penicillin.
Instead of giving her the medicine, Gandhi decided to fill the room with followers who sang devotional songs, as per the book. The next day, on 22nd February 1944, Kasturba Gandhi died. He said, “’How God has tested my faith! ‘If I had allowed you to give her penicillin, it could not have saved her. But it would have meant bankruptcy of faith on my part… And she passed away in my lap! Could it be better? I am happy beyond measure.”
Going by the rigidness of Gandhi against modern medicine, one may think he had observed the same for himself and other associates. But the case was different. Interestingly, records show that he had undergone repeated medical tests and surgery throughout his life though Kasturba was denied penicillin.
Manu was Gandhi’s grandniece and was used by him as one of the participants in his so-called ‘experiments with celibacy’ where he used to sleep naked with girls and had naked girls bathe him. She was often seen with Gandhi, who used her and Abha, another grandniece, as support while walking.
Manuben’s diaries revealed that Gandhi used to control almost every aspect of her life, including food, education, sleeping, rest schedule, and even the clothes she wore. She even used to sleep in the same bed with him.
Moon dominants twist the truth as and when it suits them. They can be controlling, manipulative liars who parade around as virtuous, kind hearted and generous people. Most people on this list have a good reputation. This is the danger of Moon influence; very few people see the darkness that truly lurks within them.
Obviously this only applies to unevolved Lunar people<3
#moon#rohini#shravana#hasta#astro notes#vedic astrology#vedic astro notes#astrology notes#astrology#astroblr#nakshatras#astrology observations#sidereal astrology#astro observations#jyotish
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MAJOR POTENTIAL SPOILERS/LEAKS REGARDING S5 (WARNING)
Last Spring/Summer, a semi popular fandom account on Twitter got sent some leaks about S5, focused on the first half of the season. At this time, many fandom accounts were receiving supposed leaks, so our attention was a bit scattered and we didn’t focus on any of them too much. A popular leak account on Twitter (unrelated to ST) also mentioned that they had gotten the first half of S5 leaked, and that this source is “never wrong”. Now, it is hard to tell if these leaks are the same as the ones that the specific fandom account I’m talking about received, but something to keep in mind. Her leaks were given to her by a person named James (which I assume is a fake name). These leaks were also posted on Reddit, last year, by her (the person in the fandom that got the leaks from James) but some major things were omitted in that post. I’m gonna leave a link here in case you guys want to read the discussion.
I’m sharing these leaks with you because some things from them are kinda lining up with what we’re seeing from S5 production. Keep in mind that these could be fake/wrong, and James himself said he didn’t have info on the last couple of scripts.
According to James, Mike dies in Ep. 3. I’m adding more screenshots later for more context, but the gist of these leaks is that Mike bites it, mlvn never breakup nor do they get a resolution, and Byler is left up to interpretation but never really happens. (I don’t really need to get into how shitty this all is writing wise)
Let’s go over the things these leaks might have potentially gotten right, according to what we know so far.
1. James said that the time jump would occur in ep. 1, after an establishing scene where S4 left off. He said the time jump would place us in late 1987/early 1988. He also mentioned there would be a series of flashbacks showcasing stuff from before the time jump. The dates he gave do seem to be accurate, and David Harbour had a shaved head right before they went into filming, which could imply pre time jump scenes.
2. According to him, after Mike dies, they find a letter he had been writing. Some of us were theorizing Finn had a letter in his back pocket in those rooftop pics. Could’ve also been Finn’s script and he just stuck it there (who knows).
3. He said that Joyce gets badly injured in ep.3, and since there’s speculation Winona was seen filming at the hospital, some people think that means she was taken there because of her injury. It’s important to notice that Natalia, Cara, and Finn were also supposedly seen filming at the hospital, and that the production called for many extras for nurses and paramedics. So whatever they’re filming at the hospital, it might be bigger than Joyce getting injured in her leg. Let’s remember Max is at the hospital too. I’m not 100% sold on this part of the leaks.
4. Today it was revealed that they’re setting up to film at Stone Mountain. (This is where they filmed UD scenes for S4)
Apparently production might have purple tentacles out already. (UD vines?)
Cara Buono mentioned, in that video shared by Ross Duffer, that she was filming stuff from Ep.2. This was around 2 days ago.
The people that know about the leaks think this is where Mike dies in ep. 3. Here’s some further context:
Here’s some stuff he said about mlvn:
Which is just….meh, because like I said, it doesn’t look like him and El ever breakup before his supposed death. Plus Byler never gets any resolution.
Now some things that might disprove the leaks (I’m trying to be impartial here)
1. These leaks mentioned Argyle a couple of times, saying he has a hero moment at some point. Eduardo made it sound like he’s not coming back to the show, but tbh he could just be lying. He’s listed for ep.2 on IMDb (and yes I know anyone with an account can edit that site)
2. These leaks say that Mike is very insufferable for the 3 episodes he’s alive, basically lashing out at everyone, specially El, and just overall behaving like an asshole. I really didn’t get that from the ElMike rooftop scene, in fact he seemed very gentle with her. People that know about these leaks think that the rooftop scene is Mike maybe apologizing to El and them having a heart to heart, right before he dies (no comment).
All in all, if Mike is dying this early, I’m sure we’ll know soon enough. The rest of the cast is gonna be filming for like a year, and Finn will be done in like two weeks 💀
I also hope there’s more leaks soon (on Reddit) so that we might compare them to these and see wtf is up.
I know someone is gonna inevitably ask why leaks would be out almost a whole year before they started filming when we usually get them during filming or post production, but I’ve been told these leaks happened around the time the writer’s strike began, which is when they were originally gonna start filming. I was also told other shows had issues with leaks around that same time.
I don’t want to get too much into the truly awful writing we’re facing if these are real but…First, I believe it’s a total disservice to Mike’s character. One of your mains since S1 and you don’t even offer him the option of dying towards the end of the season? Even fucking Eddie got that. Two, it seems like a very easy cop out for not having to make Byler canon. Let’s just have neither ship be endgame and that way we don’t get queerbaiting allegations. It also stands in a zone too close to torture porn for my liking, because sure let’s kill the character two of the most traumatized characters in the history of TV love most. And yes, it’s also a disservice to El and Will’s characters. And lastly, if that supposed letter vaguely alludes Mike having some sort of sexuality problems (we don’t know atp) it is pretty fucked up they just killed him off like that. Sure let’s not explore any of that, but give a half assed explanation via letter ex machina. This is looking like Supernatural finale levels of bad to me.
Another point, I distinctly remember the Duffers saying, after S4, that they could never kill off a character like Mike because it would be too painful, and that ST would cease to be ST and lose its identity. They didn’t want to be like GOT. I sincerely hope they actually meant this and were not trying to be cheeky or whatever the fuck.
It would be genuinely insane, and quite frankly, a highlight of their lack of writing abilities.
I hope the leaks are wrong, but I felt like it was necessary to warn everyone just in case. I know I’m not watching something this awful.
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