#but for some reason this surprised me the most lol
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Howdy T'Witch! It makes me so happy that you got your blog all up and designed! Those are big days and I’m happy that it looks so good! Hopefully you think so too!
I say that your writing requests were open and I’d love to pick your brain on some light angst if you’re up for it! No worries if you ain’t because hey understandable. The holidays be crazyyyyyy 🤪
But maybe to something to think about if you’re bored and whatever. But I wanted to ask on how do you think the Bayverse Boys would respond to you (y/n) getting amnesia and forgetting about them completely for whatever reason for how ever long? Do you think they’d try to rejog their memory or try to love them better with the chance of a fresh start? Or something else entirely. I am curious and I’d love to hear your thoughts if you’ve got the time and energy. Thanks for existing!
Hey Anon! (It’s weird to type this and have you not actually be an anon lmao)
I am very happy I finally have my blog up and running how I like, it finally feels like a little home to me. Thank you for noticing! 🫂🫂🫂
Thank you so much for sending an ask, I’m going to have fun with this one! I’m giving them a happy ending though, cause I can’t write angst and not give my boys a good ending. (Also completely unedited and not proof read lol)
Leonardo
The worry and anxiety he feels in the pit of his stomach like he swallowed a lead weight is one thing, but the chest-clenching heartbreak when you shriek at the sight of him and had no recollection of his existence is another.
He keeps a stoic face once you’ve calmed down and while explaining who he is to you, but really this poor guy is absolutely gutted. It takes so much of him to keep a straight face.
Still a bit of a helicopter, using any subtle opportunity to jog your memory of himself. He’ll make a cup of tea for you in the exact way he did on your first date, subtly comment on your outfit when he recognizes it’s something he bought you, anything he could think of to hopefully remind you.
This man does not sleep the entire time. You aren’t sleeping in his bed, how could he anyway? Once he is sure you are fully asleep, he comes to check on you. Listen to see if you talk in your sleep, mumbling about memories or just in case a nightmare decides to haunt you.
When he can’t check on you or do really anything else, he’s meditating in order to keep his emotions in line. He’s completely destroyed, so meditating for hours on end is the only way he can keep himself in check.
Although he’s snappy, irritable, and driving everyone but you away, what Leo really needs is one of his brothers to ignore the attitude and just stand there and let him get it out. By the time he’s done he’s already apologized a hundred times, he’s just lost and broken hearted.
Out of all his brothers, Raph is probably the one that cracks him and gets him to just spit it out. They all know what’s going on and how much Leo’s hurting from it all, but he still needs to let it out. Raph can handle the attitude with ease, brushing it aside and letting Leo get himself together
After what feels like an eternity, you gain your memory back at the most random of times while you happened to be watching him practice his kata. When you start babbling memories excitedly, he picks you up in a hug and cries into you.
It doesn’t matter if anyone’s watching, he’s crying and just so grateful that you remember who he is. Weeping tears of joy and the bottled anxiety finally burst as he holds you. Bear with this poor guy, it’s been a ride for both of you really.
Raphael
This poor guy is so surprised and in shock when you don’t remember him, he thinks you’re playing some sort of prank on him at first.
“Heh- babe, c’mon…don’t joke around like dat”
Once it hits him that this isn’t a prank or joke, you genuinely do not know who he is, Raph practically shuts down.
The love of his life doesn’t remember who he is, even looks at him like he’s the monster he felt he was before meeting you. It breaks his heart so much he locks himself away for a day or two, unfortunately leaving you more confused.
When you start wanting to be near him- no, needing to be near him, is when he starts coming around. He found you pacing back and forth in front of his bedroom door like a cat waiting to enter a closed off room one night.
You couldn’t explain it, but you have this invisible pull and primal need to be near him somehow. To be close, even touching him. Although you don’t remember why, you just know you need to,
Raph starts coming out of his room and trying to act normal, but when his brothers look him in the face an see how red and raw his eyes are, the dark circles, and the heartbreak in his eyes, they know it’s just an act but wisely choose not to comment.
He catches you staring at him while he’s working out, chuckling as you bashfully try to shy away. He doesn’t tease or joke though, instead encourages you to come watch
“I miss my favorite spotting partner,” Raph admits, hoping that will help jog your memory a little. It doesn’t outright, but you do find yourself already knowing how to spot him.
After a few days of you following Raph around like a lost puppy, your memory finally comes crashing back to you when Raph slipped the boxing gloves on you for practice.
Relief. So much relief it washes over Raph like a tidal wave that nearly knocks him off his feet. He holds you and kisses you, telling you repeatedly how grateful and happy he is you have your memory and you’re here. The tears will come at night while the two of you are in bed for the night, but he holds you and everything is okay.
Donatello
Initiate full on analytical mode. He is immediately going through a thousand different scenarios and cures in his head, he almost forgets that *you forgot* who he was all together, so his babbling did nothing to calm you down.
Even with all his knowledge and abilities, it still doesn’t negate the overwhelming emotions he feels when you don’t recognize him. It hurts, makes it hard for Donnie to even breathe, but he hides it behind his science and research.
Sitting in front of his computer for days on end in between checking up on your, it becomes almost like an obsession for Donnie to get your memory back. At the risk of his own health and wellbeing, he does not stop.
From using scents he knows you enjoy, like that cologne you bought for him as a gift or your favorite body wash, tasting your favorite coffee or the tiramisu Donnie bought for the two of you on a date once.
Let’s put on that movie we watched on that one Valentine’s weekend; you were obsessed with it for weeks!
Oh, what if Donnie took you to that rooftop the two of you saw a comet in the night sky once? It was absolutely beautiful, but wasn’t nearly as beautiful as you, he confided.
Countless hours of research keep Donnie from sleeping, honestly at one point contemplating how he could just straight main-line caffeine into his blood stream to stay awake.
Without warning one night, you come into his lab and demand he sleep. Not ask, not coax, you demand Donnie to get in bad with you and get some sleep. He questions if you’ve finally gotten your memory back, but sadly no. And he’s crushed. But you still demand he lay down in bed with you.
Crawling into bed with you with awkward limbs, Donnie is surprised that you lay down exactly as you always do with him. Even without memory, it was like your body still remembered how you fit together.
Quiet tears fall as Donnie holds onto you, sleep mercifully taking him into a deep slumber. Guilt crawled its way into your stomach while trying to sleep, wishing that your memory would just return so you could stop all of this.
Waking up in the morning, you blinked with shock as you look at Donnie- looked at him like you knew him again. And you did. You had woken up with your memory by some miracle.
Kissing and hugging you with love and relief, Donnie can’t keep his hands off of you or keep the tears from smudging his glasses. It was all so hard to believe while it was happening that now it was over, it felt like the end of a tornado.
The two of you decide to sleep in a little longer, only because Donnie could barely hold his eyes open. Frankly, sleep was probably what you needed too after all this.
Michelangelo
Confused. Downright, no jokes confused. How could you not remember him so suddenly? Time just doesn’t erase like that right?
Mikey asks Donnie a million and one questions, repeating or re-wording them or giving scenarios. It drives his brother mad, but he tries to be lenient because Donnie knows how terrified his younger brother is.
He caters to you in every way; offers to get you a drink, make you something to eat, get you a pillow, it becomes a little overwhelming, but you don’t know how to tell him to stop.
When Mikey tries to kiss you and pull away, it was like you could practically hear the way his heart shatters like glass. But he hides it with a smile and flirts, telling you he won you over once, he could do it again.
This is when he starts to flirt with you like he did before the two of you started dating, but with far more strategy and knowledge. Comments about how sweet you are while making your favorite chocolate pancakes with strawberries and whipped cream
Tells you how amazing you look in that shirt or those pants, mostly because he was the one to buy them.
He’ll give you your favorite kind of gifts; favorite flowers, candy, stuffed animals, anything he can think of giving you and jog your memory. Each time it doesn’t work, he’s crushed a little bit more, but he keeps trying.
Plays movies that you and Mikey watched together, shared music playlists the two of you built together over the period of your relationship, and whatever else he could possibly think of. But it still didn’t work.
When you aren’t anywhere near to see, Mikey with let himself cry for a moment out of frustration and sadness that you don’t remember him. It hurts, but by the time you are near he has a smile back on his face.
He thought you were sleeping one night when you found him crying down one of the sewer tunnels away from the lair. The sight broke your heart, which for some reason jogged your memory. Rushing to hug and kiss him, you damn near scared Mikey out of his shell.
“Angelcakes, you remember!?” Mikey shouts, picking you up and spinning you in a massive hug. Thank the pizza Gods, he had you back!
Taglist
@silverwatergalaxy @thelaundrybitch @sophiacloud28 @iridescentflamingo @thegirlwiththeninjaturtletattoos
@yorshie @truffle-reblogs @redsrooftopprincess @ninnosaurus @thepinkpanther83
@avery73 @luckycharms1701 @tmnt-tychou @suksiskovaikkakuuseen @milykins @justalotoffanfiction
#Wee!!#Bayverse TMNT#Bayverse TMNT Headcanons#tw amnesia#cw amnesia#Bayverse TMNT x reader#Leonardo#Leo#Raphael#Raph#Donatello#Donnie#Michelangelo#Mikey
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My dad: I only spent one night in jail.
Me: For possession, right?
My dad: Nah. For being drunk and disorderly
Me: When????
My dad: When I was 16 :) I climbed a water tower when I was working in Saskatchewan :)
#my dad was convicted for carrying pot so thats why i asked about possession#this man has done all sorts of drugs#been open about stupid shit he did in his youth#like when he bought acid from a man named Tree in a Kmart parking lot#or did acid on a stuck tube in London back in the 70s#or when he and his buddies set a fog horn off in a dorm and blew out all the windows#or when he slid down an Olympic ski hill in a garbage bag#but for some reason this surprised me the most lol
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I've actually found a coherent (negative) criticism on Jingli.u's quest!! Wow!! It's in Chinese on weibo
This user said her behaviour is very double standard. That she criticises and condemns both Dan Fen.g and Yingx.ing severely for trying to bring back Bai.heng in any way, but then she goes to visit Bail.u and tells her that seeing her is better than any medicine. And the user is right! That's exactly why they did what they did (well, I've always been of the opinion that Dan Fen.g had more reasons going on based on the in game information), so why the insistent asking to Blade?
The user also says that Jingliu doesn't really behave at all like a friend, that while very believable that she loved and was close to Bai.heng, it's hard to believe the same thing when it comes to Yingxi.ng and Dan Fen.g. They said that nowadays we still see instances through the Xianzhou in which they are both spoken about in positive terms, that Yingxi.ng is talked about as a legendary furnace master, and we can even stumble upon good opinions on Dan Fen.g, but that Jingli.u never shows that kind of understanding for people in theory she loved, knew personally and was close to.
I don't agree entirely with this, I do think there was a lot of fondness from Jingliu shining through despite everything (especially towards Yin.gxing, in my opinion), but I do think it's a somewhat fair criticism. I loved how they mention that despite everything the Xianzhou's view on Yingxin.g and Dan Fen.g isn't just negative. They're right, and it's a detail I love.
#I think these kinds of pseudo incoherences‚ such as Dan Fen.g's and Yingx.ing's acts or even Jingliu being so angry with them#but wanting to see Bai.heng in that echo and then visiting Bail.u‚ actually make a lot of sense in the context of human emotions and acts#I think these paradoxical acts and flaws often add a lot of depth and humanity‚ and tbh they make the characters imo often more believable#But even though I still think it makes sense I do think this time the criticism pointed out some interesting inconsistencies#in Jingliu's characterisation. I loved that they brought up both these subjects and that they didn't have as black and white view#on either Dan Fen.g or Yingxin.g and their acts‚ and that they commented the thing with the Xianzhou. Finally someone else points this out#ngl I've been reading a lot of Chinese opinions on weibo and forums and I like the Chinese fandom a lot more than the western? xD#I agree with a lot of the comments they make. Most of them in fact. Seeing the western twitter fans I expected some other opinions#to be the most expanded among Chinese fans but to my surprise they aren't. I guess the western fans just focus on what they want#Often I agree with the Chinese fans but we come out with different emotions towards the story. Like‚ we reach the same conclusions#But they dislike the characters and writings and I actually like them for the same reasons lol#Like many things around Dan Fen.g#I don't know. I've had a lot of fun reading many of these opinions#Even when they're most callous and show their dislike about the story and characters they are often very clever and fun#As a conclusion of a sort of summary/interpretation of the Xianzhou arc someone said (as negative criticism) something along the lines of#'there's only two normal people in the whole Xianzhou‚ Fu Xua.n and Jing Yu.an' and it made me laugh a lot xD#I talk too much#I should probably delete this later#Traces#Fragments and scraps#Perhaps#There were more things they said/I wanted to comment but I started writing this post‚ got distracted and finished it many hours later#So I think I've forgotten a lot of stuff. I'll try to recall and add them later#Funny thing this time I was looking for opinions on Jing Yua.n and I found everything but that lol
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My favorite part of 4x07 is the fact that it doesn’t tell us fucking shit. I knew more going into that episode than coming out. Like, what is the curse? What’s it’s relation to MK? Does it even have a relation to MK? Was turning into MK’s likeness just a trick, or are they really the same? How the fuck does Azure lion control the curse and the scroll (especially at the end after the curse is “defeated” and everything is cracking apart)? How does this episode relate to MK’s flashes from previous episodes? Did MK give the curse form? Was anything Azure Lion said about it and the scroll in 4x02 true? How did Azure escape the scroll? How does the underworld play into all of this? What did defeating the curse honestly do? And, now that the curse is supposedly defeated, what in the world is the inside of the scroll like for those trapped inside? How was MK able to defeat the curse? Supposedly the scroll is “a prison designed to contain wicked souls, forcing them to relive their past misdeeds over and over again.” The curse however is something else. So again, WHAT IS THE CURSE.
The more I think about it the less it makes sense.
#BUT THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT HAPPENED WHEN I THOUGHT ABOUT MK A LITTLE TOO HARD#Like oh. He can just regenerate his powers? Even when supposedly both Macaque and LBD took it from him? Okay. Sure.#Did Sun Wukong even want a successor? He kinda just goes off and does whatever.#Really he just left the world for hundreds of years. What's the point of coming back now and having a 'successor'?#And um. It takes 'someone special' to wield the staff? It's *not* the product of SWK 'mysteriously' giving MK powers?#Well. That kinda sounds like SWK didn't give MK any powers. And even if he did how in the world did he manage that.#Does even Monkie King have the ability to just give people that much power?#and like#'oh everyone has some form of a flashback or implied history EXCEPT for MK. We know nothing of his past. That's kinda weird.'#The number of times SWK is like 'no MK can do it' when there is NO FEASIBLE REASON FOR HIM TO BELIEVE SO#'Like yeah come on man 'patience and focus' you can wield the staff even if Macaque supposedly took my power from you.'#or even like#'Oh yeah lol of course you got your powers back when you needed them most. That's not surprising.'#'No pigsy let him go and face LBD alone he can do it. He'll stop her use of the samadhi fire and save the world.' LIKE WHAT#Like nothing made sense the more you thought about it#AND NOW I HAVE MY ANSWER#MK *IS* A MONKIE IN SOME FORM.#Idk how he was created or what his past is#BUT I DO KNOW I WAS RIGHT TO QUESTION THE BULLSHIT#Like lol his weird interactions with LBD's powers and the scroll (who are both connected to the underworld) JUST FUELS ME FUTHER#OH AND THE FUCKING KEY. WHATEVER THE FUCKING KEY IS.#I swear MK is some sort of destiny altering fucked up eldritch boy made as a weapon.#lmk#lego monkie kid#lmk s4#imp tag
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Update on the Hiccstrid Accidental Marriage AU - we are 3.5k words in and I have decided that Gobber is an ~ambiguous parent figure~ for Hiccup, although that has yet to come to play in the fic yet.
(Also I have yet to get to Astrid's POV although I feel I must have an Astrid POV because I need to put her family into fic, and also she is Bad At Feelings and being romantic and I need to contrast Hiccup's current depressed thought spiral with something else)
I'm putting a little snippet beneath the cut:
Here’s something interesting to know about Tuffnut Thorston: When he was fourteen, he trained under the Berk village officiator. He had been going through something at the time and had been really, really insistent on finishing the course despite the poor guy’s attempts to get him to stop pestering him. Eventually, through perseverance and a stubbornness rivalled only by the fiercest Gronckle, Tuffnut had an official certificate with the signatures of the officiator, the chief and Gothi herself to say that yes, he could officiate Viking union ceremonies. Tuffnut had promptly forgotten about this, shoving the certificate into the depths of his chest, because the new dragon training class had begun and the thing that he’d been going through had kinda fizzled out until it was as forgotten as the qualification. Forgotten, that was, until today. “We’re what?” Astrid asks, already reaching for her axe as Tuffnut recalled that little slip of paper and the despair on Halbjorn’s face. “Yeah, it’s all coming back to me now,” he says, apparently unfussed about his imminent demise at the edge of Astrid’s axe. “Yeah we had lessons for months. Halbjorn was weirdly opposed – I think he jumped off a cliff at one point – but I got that certificate anyway!” “Chief said we had to give him a sheep in recompense,” Ruffnut adds, nodding along to her brother’s story. Hiccup can already feel the despair setting in as Snotlout starts to laugh uncontrollably. He and Astrid were, by the law of Vikings and of Valhalla, married.
#I'm having a lot of fun with this#to no-one's surprise it's kinda got away from me and now I'm invested in the relationships both of them have with their parent figures#and general family nonsense#I should make a post about my headcanons for the gangs family situations at some point#I swear I can write romance lol but it's probably going to be another 1.5k until we even get there#also do I think that some of the characters are being more dramatic about this than they might otherwise be?#yes but if they reacted otherwise it wouldn't be an interesting fic#so we get irrationally incredibly anxious about the situation Hiccup#And Freaking Out because she Does Not Do Romance and certainly not Romance With Hiccup The Most Romantic with Astrid#also they have deep crippling fears of disappointing their families#for different reasons#Hiccstrid#HTTYD#RTTE#HTTYD Films#Hiccstrid Accidental Marriage AU#Snotlout Gets The Axe#Fae's Stuff
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Show don't tell only works when you balance it with tell don't show. Telling me a character is in love doesn't do much, if they never show their love. And likewise, I ain't a mindreader, no amount of Acts of Service, or Physical Affection is gonna make me think a character loves someone beyond the platonic, unless it is also stated. One of my favourite book series shows rather than tells. With everything. To the point that if I hadn't read spoilers for it, the fact that one of the characters asked an other to marry them in the epilouge would have come completely out of the left field. If I remember correctly, even with that foreknowledge, no amount of shipper goggles had me shipping them up until that point. I can't read between the lines if there is no lines in the first place.
#writing#why show don't tell is a lie#because you need to show AND tell#show dont tell and tell don't show go hand in hand#while some writers are able to do more or less without one#you need atleast some amount of the other to allow your readers to understand what the heckle is going on#Admittedly you generally need more show than tell to get me to believe it#like Bella Swan was supposedly smart#and we do see it to some degree#but the fact that she figured Edward was a fucking vampire stinks more of plot needing to move than her being actually clever#since theres like over two books before we see her being smart again#the next spot of intelligence being when she figures how to shield others with her deus ex machina brain powers#You know#to lowkey kick a dead horse#look#i liked the twilight books#they're the book equvalent of junk food#and just like I'll complain about how gross fast food fries become five minutes after they're served#I will continue to complain about Twilight and point out the ways it could have been better#because there IS potential there#If the author had given herself more than the bare bones of time to write plot and publish it#I love urban fantasy and twilight is that#its not a great example in many ways#but it shows how easy it could be to incorporate fantasy in a more modern setting#Admittedly every character in the series is infinitely more interesting than Edward#hell even bella becomes more interesting when you remove him and just have her interact with other characters#like I'd love to read about how much of a pain it must be to be Jasper in a fucking highscool#all these teens(children to him lol)in the crusp of hormone and emotional hell#it wouldn't surprise me if the reason he looks constipated has less to do with blood and more to do with how everyone fucking feels#and like I donno about u but teens are some of the most savage creations of humanity
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I really do think I need to make a For Real permanent pinned post, because people keep coming on this blog expecting me to be Normal™ and I, for the love of all that is good and sane, do not know what I ever did to give off that impression.
#my icon is cersei and people are somehow always surprised that I like j/c for some reason?#or that I'm not constantly going '[insert pRoBLeMaTiC thing here] should never be written ever'#tbh most of what I post is comparatively tame & there's a lot of stuff I never talk about because it involves Niche Media no one's seen#I'd say that maybe I DO need to separate things into specific sideblogs but a) I don't have that kind of discipline and b) I shouldn't#have to do that? luckily I've avoided the bulk of harassment (usually because I avoid using media tags when I make a post) but I shouldn't#have to keep up some complicated system of multiple blogs just so people who enjoy 50% of the things I post/reblog don't attack me over#the other 50% (<-change percentages on a case-by-case basis as needed)#idk I've just run into a fair amount of people who seem to think I fit their idea of Not A Gross Freak when. lol. go somewhere else buddy.
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I love these! ❤️ Balto's father looks great, and so does his mother. I like how they both have gray coats.
Balto 2 and 3 are simply NOT Canon to me. XD According to Simon Wells, the creator of Wolf Quest NEVER saw the original film, which in my opinion is just... no. I was never a fan of the random inclusion of songs or the spirits, I was not much of a fan of the new characters, and Niju and his wolfie sidekicks felt more like discount Steele, Nikki, Kaltag, and Star.
Also, looking back now it makes NO SENSE that Aleu looks more like a wolf than Balto. Everyone said she looked more wolf than Balto, even Balto said so, and yet she was literally 3/4 dog (Siberian Husky), 1/4 wolf. If she was more wolf than he, she'd be more like Mia Tuk/White Fang, who had a pureblooded wolf for a father and a 1/2 wolf-hybrid (Kiche) for a mother. Mathematically speaking, she should have looked more like her siblings.
Plus, it is obvious that Balto got his brownish-gray coat from his wolf-father. If his wolf-parent was indeed the white wolf he saw, Balto would have been born with white fur. Also, Balto wouldn't have been born in the town of Nome if his mother was a wolf. He would have been born in the wild.
I like to imagine his father resembled one of these wolves from the film:
I've been wanting to make fanart of Balto as a pup with his father.
And I would base him off of one of those wolves.
Balto’s parents
info from dA (for those who don’t get the idea):
Prospective Balto’s parents Melona and I don’t accept version of Balto 2 that the white wolf is his mother. It’s a spiritual embodiment of his wolf nature, inner cry. Each time you watch this scene, the whole body is covered with goose bumps. Very emotional moment. And the second part destroyed the whole idea and the atmosphere, as the most of the sequels. Well, I just leave it here: ►Simon Wells said that Balto’s mother was working sled dog and his father was the wolf; their story was in the style of Romeo and Juliet; ►The White wolf is not real (Simon Wells said that he is the male character, and said that he deliberately portrayed his mysterious and inexplicable, and he said again that wolfblood Balto got inherited from his father) . Wells described it as “the incarnation of the inner call of the Baltic, calls on him to take the wolf essence and realize that this is a strength, not a shame.” I decided to try, as they might look like. I tried not much knock them out of the original style, but not so lucky.
#balto#wolf#dog#wolfdog#fanart#art#Balto 2 is NOT Canon to me lol#Neither is Balto 3#The fact that the director of Wolf Quest NEVER SAW the first film just says a lot to me#I wouldn't be surprised if most of the people behind All Dogs Go to Heaven 2 and the series never saw the first ADGTH either#It would certainly explain A LOT of the weird writing decisions and inconsistencies and retcons they did#FFS Judith Barsi's death did not stop the Land Before Time sequels from including and recasting Ducky!#I know Anne-Marie's story was done but it would have not hurt or offended anyone if they at least had Charlie and/or Itchy mention her!#Charlie should have stuck around to help the new boy to make up for what he did to Anne-Marie#Instead of avoiding returning to Heaven because he was bored of it and wanted a piece of ass#They should have kept his character development from the last movie intact and given him a new arc#And they should included Flo the collie and developed her some more instead of replacing her with Sasha#What is the point of including another love-interest when you could just develop the original one?#Having Flo take care of David makes sense with her character anyway and maybe the reason she took care of orphans was because SHE was one?#Red also should have been a hellhound seriously missed opportunity#Killer also SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE COMIC-RELIEF INSTEAD OF CARFACE ffs#Why dumb-down the original villain of the first movie when you already have a comic-relief sidekick at your disposal??#And omg why not set it in the 1940s instead of awkwardly setting it 60+ YEARS AFTER THE FIRST FILM?? Dogs don't even live that long! 😆#UGH so many missed opportunities and wasted potential#Note to self: Make ADGTH2 fanart but with your versions of the characters and setting someday seriously XD#gazeopard rambles#universal studios
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How JJK Men Eat Pussy 2.0
Satoru, Suguru, Nanami, Toji, Sukuna, Yuta, Itadori, Megumi
Warnings: All characters are 18+, this post is explicit smut. As if you couldn’t tell that from the title
A/N: Funny story, I forgot I already wrote this same concept last year… but since I didn’t realize until I finished writing this… imma post it anyways. But if you’d like to see my original thoughts on this topic, you can see them here with an additional 2 characters lol
Gojo Satoru
He is relentless, especially when he’s in the mood to go down on you. These little moods of his will have him between your legs for hours, multiple times a day. You always like to joke that he knows when you’re ovulating because somehow these little moods seem to fall in sync. If Satoru goes more than three days without you, it’s like he’s going through withdrawals. He’s skilled with his tongue, he’s able to move it in ways and speeds you didn’t know a man could. Typically he’s a tease, he’ll edge you until you have an orgasm so pathetic you can’t even call it one. Ya know, the kinds where you come and don’t feel that satisfaction, just the pulsating ache of needing more. But recently, Satoru discovered how much more fun it is to overstimulate you. He loves the way your finger’s bury in his hair and try to tug him off as he sucks on your clit until you’re sobbing and begging him to ease up. He’ll keep your thighs spread wide, large hands effortlessly keeping them in place while they desperately try and close. He’s also the type to see those “pineapple make’s your cum sweet” articles and come home with enough pineapples to feed a village. He’s not even embarrassed about his reasoning, even if it’s just a myth, his sweet tooth can’t pass up the opportunity. Satoru loves your natural taste, but you surprised him with edible lubes in various fruity and sweet flavors one night… you still recall seeing the sun rise.
Geto Suguru
He’s a god at eating pussy and you can’t convince me otherwise. Suguru has always been about your pleasure over his, not to say he doesn’t have his selfish moments, but your pleasure is just so much fun to him. He loves the noise, the facial expressions, the smell, the taste. The first time he went down on you, you were convinced he was lying about it being his first time. The ability just came naturally to Suguru. Like Satoru, Suguru loves to tease you. He’ll focus all of his attention on your dripping entrance, only stimulating your clit if his nose bumps it. He loves the way you squirm, his nails leaving crescent shaped nail marks in the plump flesh of your thighs as he holds you in place. He loves your breathless gasps, his long hair tickling your thighs as he eats you out, only adding to the stimulation that’s making your toes curl. Suguru loves to make you beg, pulling his mouth away from your cunt to just barely flick his tongue over your clit. He’ll stop all together just to taunt you until you’re sobbing, begging him to do something. He has a whole album on his phone dedicated to you, most of the content being videos of him eating you out, some he even made you take just so he could see the camera shake with your effort to keep it straight and hear your noises better. He puts on a show for you, slurping and sucking and moaning just to feel your thighs tremble as you moan with him.
Nanami Kento
Eating you out is a stress reliever for Nanami… so it happens like very fucking day. Lord help me this man will spend hours edging you, cheek pressed into your thigh as he lazily licks and nips at your cunt. He can’t think about anything but you when he is between our legs, moaning and whining his name like a beautiful lullaby. He’ll let you cum eventually, but for the time being you are completely at his mercy. Nanami is the type to wake you up with his head between your legs, especially on nights where he comes home late and you’re already passed out in bed. He’ll make out with your cunt honestly, licking and sucking and nipping at your folds until he can’t tell if you’re wet from his saliva or your own arousal. The answer is both. He doesn’t care for any of the fancy shit, so don’t bother with flavored lubes or eating particular fruits to try and alter your taste, he just wants you and you alone. I feel like this man has a scent kink so the smell of your arousal honestly gets him going even more. He prefers eating you out in bed, mostly because he’s tired and nothing feels better to him than laying on his plush mattress while using your thighs as his pillow. He’s a whore for face sitting by the way, even less of his energy needs to be put into that, especially when you’re grinding your cunt against his tongue. Nanami’s other favorite thing to do is use his tie to bind your wrists, that way you really can’t interrupt him.
Fushiguro Toji
I had to restart Toji’s so many times because I got too aggressive. Listen, this bummy ass bitch will eat you out till the sunrises and he will make a fucking mess of you while he does it. Toji will eat you out and finger fuck you until you’re screaming. He’ll give you a “break” by stuffing you full with his dick and then get back to work eating you out again after he blew his load in you. Filthy bitch. He’ll eat you out anytime, anywhere, any position. He’ll never turn down the opportunity and depending on your relationship with him, this bitch may even charge you for his services. Which is just another way he likes to tease you, watching you whine and squirm while you cough up the money he wants. He’ll call you pathetic as he gets on his knees and basically rips your underwear off of you, commenting the whole time about how much of a whore you are… like he ain’t selling his body to you rn. This man will somehow make you feel inferior, but you can’t be bothered when his tongue is lapping at your cunt like a starved man. Toji will make sure your thighs and your cunt are swollen, bruised, overstimulated, and sore by the time he’s done with you. Your cunt is puffy from his sucking and biting, thighs littered in dark marks and teeth indents. He'd go as far as to find a marker and write “cum dumpster” on you if he was really in the mood to see you sob.
Ryomen Sukuna
Listen, you thought Toji could be mean? Sukuna is ten times worse. The thing is, the king of curses actually likes to eat pussy but he won’t admit it. But that is not to say he can’t live without it, Sukuna is selfish and really only prefers things that pleasure him in the process. But, when you’re sobbing, pathetically begging him to go down on you, he may just crack. Especially if you’re looking at him with watery eyes, swollen lips from sucking him off, your neck littered with bite marks and bruises. Oh, and, if you’ve made him cum, he’s more likely to agree and indulge you. If you manage to convince the king of curses to go down on you, don’t expect him to be easy on you. His nails are digging into the flesh of your thighs, blood dripping slowly as he eats you out with so much force it’s borderline painful. He’s using his tongue and his teeth, nipping at your folds and even grazing your clit with them until he can tell your sobs are a breathless mix of pleasure and pain. If we’re talking true form Sukuna, I promise you he won’t stop until you’ve blacked out. He’ll use one set of arms to hold your waist while the other set keeps your thighs spread. He’s forcefully dragging your cunt over the long tongue that protrudes from his stomach, occasionally stopping just to hold you still as he spreads you open and stuffs you with the same tongue, watching you yelp and moan as he toys with you.
Okkotsu Yuta
If you look up the definition of “pussy drunk” you’ll see a picture of Yuta. This man cannot go down on you without becoming delirious. Your body puts him in a trance, he can’t even explain the way you make him feel. Yuta is all about body worship and his favorite way to go about it is having his face shoved between your legs for hours. He’s just as vocal as you are while he eats you out, groaning and whining against your cunt until the vibrations are making your eyes roll back as you cum again. He’ll be kneading your thighs as he eats, squeezing them like stress balls and hitting nerves that send sparks of electricity all the way to your toes and all the way up to the base of your neck. Without even trying, Yuta will manage to overstimulate you until you’re unironically going cross-eyed, fingers twitching as they bury in his hair and try to pull him off so you can catch your breath. Yuta is still a bit shy when it comes to being intimate outside of the privacy of your home. But that doesn’t mean he won’t drag you into the nearest bathroom and eat you out against the bathroom stall. In this sense, he’s almost cocky when someone unknowingly enters the bathroom only to see two sets of feet in one of the stalls. Not to mention the noises are echoing. Yuta lives to see your eyes going wide from embarrassment as he doesn’t stop, your noises are uncontrollable as he tongue fucks you. The poor bastard who entered the bathroom with the intention of properly using it just muttered under their breath and walked out.
Itadori Yuji
Yuji is eager, so, so damn eager. He wants to do anything and everything that brings you pleasure so when it comes to eating you out, he’s determined to be great at it. Yuji is the type to ask you for “practice” or “lessons” which is just his way of indirectly asking if he can eat you out. Most of the time, it’s an offer you can’t refuse, because as fate would have it, Yuji isn’t bad at anything. He’s so praise focused, eyes glued to your face as he flicks his tongue along your folds and waits for you to tell him he’s doing good. He’ll slow down when your praise isn’t coming fast enough because he wants you to beg. Yuji is a sucker for adding fingers to the mix, as much as he loves making you cum with just his tongue, he sees no point in limiting your pleasure for his own confidence boost. Kind of contradictory since he likes when you beg. Yuji is also the type to wake you up with his head between your legs, just slowly lapping at your cunt while also rutting his hips into the mattress, trying to not wake you up until you’re coming. He finds it so pretty when you wake up gasping, completely unable to restrict any of your noises as you orgasm. It’s important to mention that Yuji is a sucker for 69-ing and face sitting, he loves, loves, feeling your plush thighs caging in his head. He can’t get enough of the way your body settles so nicely into him, no longer afraid of “suffocating him” by sitting all the way down on him.
Fushiguro Megumi
He won’t admit it but he loves to eat you out. Megumi is shy at heart so even if he’s been with you for years, he can still get embarrassed when telling you how badly he wants to go down on you. He’s focused when he does get between your legs, hands gripping your thighs or hips while his tongue laps greedily at your cunt. Megumi loves to tongue fuck you, just because he knows it’s not enough stimulation to make you cum but enough to make you embarrassingly wet. He’s a bit mean at first, not willing to let you come until he feels you’ve earned it. He’ll stop abruptly just to sink his teeth into your inner thighs, not stopping until you’re gasping as the pain turns bruising. He’ll admire the teeth indents he’s left on your skin while his nails are scratching down your other thigh, tongue moving to wiggle against your clit until your hips are bucking. Megumi finds toys to be very hit or miss, but he’s found a love for stuffing you with a vibrator while putting all of his attention on your clit. Megumi’s preferred method of “torture” depends on his mood, either he’ll edge you until you’re begging or overstimulate you until you’re crying. He’s very private when it comes to these things… unless he’s jealous. Much like Yuta, he will not hesitate to drag you somewhere private while out in public to remind you of who you belong to.
#dividers are from @benkeibear#jujutsu kaisen smut#jjk smut#jujutsu kaisen headcanons#jjk headcanons#gojo smut#geto smut#satoru smut#suguru smut#nanami smut#toji smut#sukuna smut#yuta smut#itadori smut#megumi smut#gojo x reader#geto x reader#nanami x reader#toji x reader#sukuna x reader#yuta x reader#itadori x reader#megumi x reader
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gojo satoru x reader | college au [18+]
kickoff ch.12 how you get the girl
ᰔ pairing. college au - soccer player! gojo x film major! reader
ᰔ summary. gojo satoru is the most popular guy on your college campus. he's tall, funny, hot, not to mention he's the most talented soccer forward the school has seen in years. but he's also a frat dude, which puts him in a world very different from your own, as he spends most of his nights partying while you spend most of yours working on your annoying film major assignments. but when he reaches out to you for a favor, you realize that helping him out might have something in it for you too.
ᰔ warnings/tags. 18+, fem reader, fluff, angst, smut, college au, fraternities, sororities, partying, drinking/alcohol, romance, jealousy, pining, slow burn, opposites to lovers, friends to lovers, she falls first he falls harder, gojo being an idiot, marijuana use, sexism, sexual harassment (verbal only)
ᰔ chapter. 12/x (probably 18)
ᰔ words. 11.3k
a/n. man the color scheme for this chapter is kinda giving BRAT lolol...i mean gojo IS brat. anywho, i don't have much to say at the beginning of this chapter but i do have a LOT to say at the end of it sooo see y'all at the bottom!! hope u enjoy. also BIG THANK YOU to @whereflowerswenttodie who beta read parts of this chapter for me n convinced me not to scrap it lol
nav. masterlist
☾·̩͙꙳ moodboard no.1 :: ♬.*゚playlist
11:03am you: hi! 11:03am you: good luck today 11:03am you: incase i don’t see you
11:05am Gojo Satoru: Why wouldn’t you? Aren’t you gonna be on the field for your newsletter shots?
11:07am you: i mean yes but idk where i’m gonna be stationed so 11:07am you: it might not be on UTokyo’s side of the field
11:08am Gojo Satoru: Okay then I’ll look for you before the game starts
11:10am you: no pls don’t. coach yaga thinks i distract you. i don’t want to get yelled at again. he scares me :(
11:12am Gojo Satoru: Haha you’re silly 11:13am Gojo Satoru: East side entrance at 2 11:13am Gojo Satoru: Be there
11:14am you: or be square?
11:15am Gojo Satoru: Yea whatever shape you wanna be in is fine cutie
It’s a bright sunny day outside, perfectly blue sky with a scattering of fluffy clouds seen outside the window of your shared room in your apartment, and you realize spring is fully here from the way birds chirp past the glass. You’re stuffing your camera case full of chilled Kodak film rolls, your last stash left, and it’s the last piece of equipment you pack before slinging the strap over your shoulder and heading out the door.
Mina had offered to give you a ride to the stadium since your car’s still at the shop, but you’re happy you opted for the bumpy bus ride and although you come close to low-grade concussions from the bang of your head to the window at every other speed bump, the music in your ears while someone else is operating a public transport vehicle helps you think creatively before shooting shots.
It was surprise enough that Mina of all people was going to this game, and when you questioned her about it in the morning, she looked at you like you were absurd to assume anyone from UTokyo wouldn’t be at this game, and sure enough, it’s all anyone on Instagram has been repping on their stories or talking about in the bustling minutes before lectures. Even Utahime was going to this game, and she hates all intercollegiate sports. You knew the game was a big deal, given the way Coach Yaga was yelled at via email by the Dean of UTokyo to make sure the team wins today because a multimillion dollar Nike sponsorship would be greenlit by the prospect (for some reason you were cc’d in an email chain among divisional higher-ups, but you weren’t opposed to snooping in on conversations that were entirely outside of your tax bracket).
It’s because it’s the second to last home game before the season ends, and apparently this has been statistically the best season the UTokyo D1 Men’s Soccer team has played since the new millenia. No pressure to the players on that fact, but failure wasn’t much of an option for them anymore.
And you can feel the stakes the second you step inside the stadium. Packed would be an understatement, there were people flooding the aisles, overbooked for the sake of the university pocketing an extra buck no doubt, but spectators could care less since they were able to at least get in on the basis of that irresponsibility in the first place, despite the stadium’s capacity having long been reached before the pregame festivities even start. Banners and signs drape over railings with the school’s striking blue and golden colors, every single replay screen is lit up and brightly pixelated at every north, south, east, and west entrance for inclusive viewing. As you pass VIP security and make it into the lower field-level entry, the scattered chants from the crowd amplify in volume and you almost wince a little to yourself from the noise. The stadium felt like a living, breathing entity, pulsing with the collective heartbeat of everyone inside.
You’ve never been more overstimulated in your life, except instead of finding it frightening, it was electrifying. And for once, you think you can understand what an athlete must feel when playing on their own home turf surrounded by those that are wholeheartedly rooting for them.
Hana is quick to spot you, panic clear across her face as she regards you with a couple pages with your assigned vantage points, a rushed briefing session, and then she’s darting down the sidelines to make sure equipment is set up appropriately where needed. She’s understaffed, given you told Utahime about Kai’s little intervention last week and she made a nasty point to the university (and possibly a handful of legal threats) and they relented in firing him. So now the three of you were down a photographer, and the extra work shows in the instructions she gave you as you skim the sheets.
A glance at your phone tells you it’s close to 2pm, and your eyes take in the expanse of green on the field. UTokyo’s players practice kicking shots off to the right goal post, while YCU’s players practice shots off to the left. You can’t spot where Gojo is, but you faithfully head down to the East Side entrance like he asked you to.
When you round the corner, you almost crash right into an Ichiko mascot, but swiftly dodge, and then you stop in your tracks when you see Gojo standing right at the concrete entrance. He’s leaning back against the adjacent wall, arms crossed at his chest, and he’s stretching his neck side to side with a creased brow, an intense look in his eyes, lost in serious thought, scanning the wall across from him like he’s mapping out plays in his head.
When you approach him and catch the corner of his eyesight, he leans off the wall and flashes you one of his so extremely charmed to see you grins on reflex, and suddenly there’s nothing your senses seem to pick up on except him. Like everything else around you just disappears.
“Hey, you,” he says when he comes up to you, and you walk him like a dog back to a corner that’s tucked further away from noises and sights. You lean your back against the wall now, the coolness of concrete seeping through the fabric of your shirt, and he stands a step in front of you. Your hands toy with the strap of your camera.
“Are you ready to win today?” you ask him, and look off to the right into the flourishing seats that are still being filled to the brim, “clearly there’s no pressure.”
He breathes in deep, and releases it slowly, like there really was tension to relieve. “We’ve got no choice but to win.”
“Is that something Coach Yaga says to you guys often?” you ask him, because the man recited the same thing about five times in that email chain. “Also, apparently you take years off of his life.” Another thing he recited about five times in that email chain.
Gojo only addresses what he wants to address, as per usual. “Yeah, it’s something he says to us often.”
“So,” you say, “what did you want to talk about?”
He looks at you puzzled, tilting his head to the side. “Nothing. I just wanted to see you.”
It’s hard to assume that he didn’t have something to talk about with the intention of telling you to meet him here, because this is the same place you confessed to him a few weeks ago, and so is also the place he so painfully rejected you. But maybe he doesn’t think about these kinds of things as much as you do. “I see.”
His tongue pokes to his cheek as he studies your anticipating expression, and then he sighs, his shoulders slumping slightly. “What are we doing? I mean, I like you, and you like me too, at least I hope you still do. Why don’t we—…why don’t we just give it a go already? I don’t see how we can move forward if you won’t at least let me take you out on a date.”
Your hands stop fidgeting with your camera strap from his words, and you lick your lips, suddenly unable to keep eye contact with him so your gaze drifts down to his chest in front of you. His uniform is clean, no smudges of dirt or grass, just pure white fabric underneath heat-pressed blue and golden accents, and of course, that signature number 10. You’re sure he’s all you’ll ever think of when you see that number now for the rest of your life.
You know when you want something so bad you don’t know what to do once you have it? Because it almost seems too good to be true?
“I just wanted to let stuff between us breathe for a little bit,” you confess, “it’s just, it was a lot to deal with. Being around you when I thought you didn’t want me the way I wanted you. I don’t know if this is odd to say, and maybe I’m overthinking it, but I just feel like somewhere along the way, I kind of…forgot who you were for a little bit.” This kind of vulnerability would have you running away with your tail between your legs with anyone else, but not with him. Not after everything.
His expression softens, melting away that confrontational energy he had earlier, and he nods slowly. He opens his mouth to speak, but he can’t seem to find words. The presence of them is there, though, you can feel them. But what good are his thoughts if not voiced?
“I just wanted to spend a little bit of time getting to know you again, I guess.” You squeeze your arm in reassurance of yourself because he wasn’t giving it to you. You let out an awkward laugh. “I don’t really know what I’m saying right now, to be honest.”
You can tell he’s at a crossroads, and you think back to this week and his efforts to get you to open up to him again. You know how he feels right now, because it’s exactly how you felt when he rejected you. Like when someone is so close, yet so far, you can feel that they’re within arms reach but never truly. And they’re slipping away for some reason that you may never know, but all you can do is assume that it’s a fault of your own. You’re not really sure what he can do to make you feel secure about this whole thing anymore, and you can see the slight panic in his eyes when he realizes that too.
“I don’t mind waiting,” he tells you, rushed with a desperation entirely contrary to his words, “what’s a week or two when I want to spend a lot more of those with you anyways.” But he takes a deep breath, like he’s already mentally preparing himself for an agonizing wait in his head.
There’s a sound over the stadium speakers, something technical and sporty and goes entirely over your head in dismissal, but to Gojo it seems to have a different effect, as he’s suddenly attentive and stands up straighter, that focused expression on his face from earlier resurfacing. You realize he needs to get back to the field.
“Can we continue this conversation after the game?” he asks you hastily, already turning towards the center of the stadium. And he adds an obligatory, “sorry.”
“Yeah, sure,” you quickly agree, suddenly feeling like you’re taking up his time.
He gives you a small smile, unsure in its presentation but pure in its intention. But he can only take one step towards the field before you reach out and pinch the fabric of his jersey to keep him still. He feels the tug of it and fully faces you once again.
“Um. Just a sec,” you say, “I have something to give you before your game.”
“Oh?” he looks at you with interest, “I fucking love things.”
“You have to close your eyes though.”
“…what is the thing…” He squints at you with a what are you up to expression.
“Just close your eyes!” you snap at him.
“Okay, okay, jeez,” he holds his hands up in front of him in surrender, shaking his head to get his hair out of his face and then he closes his eyes. “You’re scary as hell sometimes. Excuse me for being cautious.”
You roll your eyes, useless because he doesn’t see it, and then take a step towards him. You cup his jaw with the palm of your hand, his cheek twitching slightly from the unexpected contact, and then you raise on your tiptoes to press your lips to his cheek. It’s short and sweet with the sound of a peck.
“For good luck,” you whisper, then you quickly lower yourself back onto your heels, take a step back and tuck some strands of hair behind your ear. The ground suddenly interests you.
He opens his eyes, blinking a few times with shock and his hand comes up to brush the tips of his fingers against the spot you kissed him, and then his gaze goes comically dazed when he reaches out to hold you. “Alright, c’mere you,” he says, closing his eyes and puckering his lips as he leans down to kiss you but you laugh and push his face away.
“No no no, only on the cheek for now,” you say with a small laugh.
He does nothing to restrain his frustrated groan. “You can’t do something that cute and then expect me to be chill about it.”
“If you win, then, maybe I’ll let you kiss me for real.”
“Maybe?”
“Yes. Maybe.”
He’s close, towering over you near this bustling east side entrance that he seems to like so much, and his eyes drop to your lips. “Alright. I like those odds.”
You give him a smile and slip away from him to get back towards the field, and you feel his eyes on you as you walk away.
The pregame events are a blur, with blaring music accompanied by the sounds of the sports announcers clipping across the speakers, finally quieted down in time for the players to line up on the field for the national anthem which was then followed by UTokyo’s alma mater.
You’re stationed on the same side of the field as Minato, UTokyo’s side, while Hana is covering the sidelines of the opposite end with the opponents goal post. Minato’s filling up a cup of Gatorade for himself at the athlete’s station and then he comes back around to find you.
“Are you ready to take your shots? I see Hana wanted you to shoot on film today,” he says to you as he sloshes around Glacier Freeze in a flimsy plastic cup.
You twist your aperture dial with your thumb. “Yesss, all set. I’ll try to keep up.”
He nods at you in approval.
The atmosphere feels nerve wracking. Something felt different about this game, the stakes feeling high. Well, of course they’re high, because if they lose today then they’re out of the tournament. But the stakes feel high for other reasons too, an energy you can pick up on but can’t quite discern.
Your eyes drift across the field where you can see a referee placing a ball at the center of the field. Off to the right, you can see Gojo standing with a few of his other teammates, including Geto, Nanami, and Choso, and they’re all gesticulating to various corners of the field as they discuss what you can only imagine have to do with their plays for today. And you realize— it’s their last college soccer season. Their second-to-last official home match before the championship, and for those of them that haven’t qualified for the national league, it may be their second-to-last match of this caliber for the rest of their lives. One of the final chances that they have to prove something of themselves. The determination was palpable.
The chief referee’s whistle cuts through the air with three short chirps, and that gathers the attention of all the players on the field. UTokyo wins the coin toss, choosing to kickoff, and YCU’s players choose to attack the left side goal.
Your stomach churns with anticipation, the crowd hushing too as all the players take their places on the field. If you feel nervous, you can only imagine how the athletes feel. There’s a rhythm that you’ve learned over the past couple of months getting to know the sport, where players stretch out their necks and kick out their feet and take subtle deep breaths as they survey the stands. Idle moments before the start of the match where they have no choice but to look forward and only forward, so they take a moment to stay in the present for as long as they can gather. You’ve never been much of a sports spectator, and perhaps you’ve only recently had some personal interest in the team, but you realize you feel pride in your school as you stand behind chalk sideline and see UTokyo’s colors scattered across the field in uniform. And fuck, you wanted them to win. You wanted them to win with fierceness and wrath, and it’s a desire you share with the crowd.
Gojo spends a minute talking to the referee before the black and white striped man pats him high on the back in the good sport and urges him towards the center of the field. He lifts his foot up onto the ball, rolling it back and forth underneath the spikes of his cleat, and you can see it in his eyes, even from all the way over here, that he seems to have different ideas in mind for this game too. High stakes. Pre-determined, set with will, evident in the clench of his jaw and the concentrated furrow of his brow as he surveys the field with his eyes, and you’re lost in the sight for what feels like forever because you can hardly register the chirp of the ref’s whistle.
And then the kickoff starts.
The ball is tapped to Geto to start the play, and the first few minutes were intense as the ball was passed back and forth between UTokyo’s players, placing pressure on YCU’s defense as they inched closer and closer towards the goal. A pass between UTokyo’s #4 was intercepted by YCU and the ball was rushed down towards the left side, the crowd’s horror evident in the uproar as they raise to their feet in fearful anticipation, and with ruthless offense, YCU’s forward takes a clear sink shot towards the goal, and the crowd holds their breath before they watch Choso lunge for it in air, gloved hands firmly grabbing the ball and then pulling it to his chest with a possessiveness you can only expect to see from a skilled goalie, before he crashes down into the ground and the crowd releases relief in the form of rowdy roars.
Ten minutes in, with everyone on their toes, each team tested each other’s defenses. UTokyo were known for stellar offense, especially within the past few years with players like Gojo Satoru and Takuma Ino joining the league as powerful forwards, but UTokyo’s overall offense was still statistically second to none other than YCU. And the pressure YCU was putting on UTokyo’s defense was wearisome to say the least. You glance to see Nanami, who is UTokyo’s best defensive player, huffing and puffing as he stands between two light-footed YCU players in an attempt to guard, and fails an attempt to steal the ball before it gets to the feet of YCU’s striker #6, passed in a split second off to his teammate, with a fake so seamless that it has Choso just a couple inches away from touching the ball before it’s sent flying into the net.
The noises from the crowd are still loud, but dampened in spirit.
With the referees hand signal up in the air, the current score is confirmed. 0-1, YCU.
Coach Yaga calls for a sub, in which he switches Nanami out for who you believe is a 2nd-year defensive player name Yuta you’ve seen around practice with a promising statistical record for interceptions, and you watch as Nanami takes the bench before he swipes the sweat off his face in exhaustion. God. Just fifteen minutes into the match, and YCU already has UTokyo’s defense winded from play.
You bring your camera up to your face, forgetting for a moment that there was still a job to do here, and you position the direction of the lens towards the center of the field, where Gojo takes his place at the ball once more. Yuta briefly passes by him, signaling some play to him by holding up a number three, likely something Coach Yaga asked him to pass on to Gojo, and you see him briefly nod, his mouth slightly agape as he breathes slowly and pulls his jersey up to wipe at the sweat at his forehead.
The referee chirps the whistle, Gojo taps the ball to Yuta, and the play starts.
YCU immediately puts pressure on UTokyo’s offensive play once more, with eager movements to steal the ball, but it’s passed between UTokyo’s players with ease, more practiced and more sure. The kind of play that you and the rest of the school was used to seeing from them. However, Geto loses the ball on a left-back pass, but right when YCU makes attempts to cover field in a long-shot kick towards the left, Yuta intercepts the ball and swiftly passes it to Gojo.
The crowd immediately rises to their feet in anticipation, watching as Gojo shuffles the ball down the field, dangerously close to off-field boundaries, a signature tactic he uses because he knows there’s not a single player in the league that can match him in precision and control to keep the ball in-field on a steal, and he swiftly passes it towards Geto with a side-swept kick, beelining down towards the goal post, in perfect time for Geto pass-back to meet his feet and when Gojo was this close to a net, there was no stopping him.
He draws his right foot back, and explosively kicks the ball forward, chipping the grass under it in the motion, and it’s sent flying towards the goal, and then threaded past the goalie right to the back of the net. The cheers that erupt across the stadium rumble the ground beneath you.
1-1, even match.
UTokyo spends no time celebrating, other than a few pats to Gojo’s back as he nods in acknowledgement, no emotion on his face other than pure concentration and greed. The greed to win, like a righteous sin. He stretches his neck out, panting slightly as he takes his place towards the right side of the field and the referee chirps his whistle to signal YCU to start the kickoff.
They quickly make attempts in moving the ball towards their scoring-end of the field, but face push-back from UTokyo’s defense, unable to make it much further past the midfield line, and you bring your camera up to take a snap of Gojo, who you see is still standing off to the right side of the field. But when you position it and peer through the viewfinder, that space he once stood at was empty. You pull your camera down, and blink at the sight, and then the crowd is picking up in volume once more.
Gojo sprints down the flank, cutting past every defender, and moves towards YCU’s attacking goal, which was a shocking place to be for a center forward, but you could feel his desire and determination to steal this back-and-forth ball, and succeeds when YCU makes an open pass, thinking they were in the clear, only to have Gojo sneak in at the last moment and get the ball at his feet.
The play moves by in a flash, a blur that you or anyone else in the stadium could hardly keep up with it, movements so fast you were shocked a human being was capable of even running that far in such a short amount of time, and in an almost embarrassingly easy play, Gojo makes a fool out of YCU’s defenders as he slips the ball through the legs of his last obstacle before he struck it with sharp precision, sending it soaring to the corner of the goal, past the outstretched arms of the goalie, and into the net.
2-1, UTokyo.
It was electrifying, the feeling that strikes through the stadium, one that reaches you in your own blood. You’re shocked, standing here, after witnessing Gojo score two goals within the matter of minutes, against one of the top three teams in the league. It’s a shock that reaches everyone, including Coach Yaga who’s standing about ten feet down the line from you, his arms crossed, and you see his eyes for the first time as he takes his sunglasses off to get a better look at what he’s seeing.
You trail his sight, dragging your gaze across the field until it lands at Gojo, who is barely acknowledging the encouraging pats and shakes and goodhearted shoves that his teammates were giving him, because he was focused. It might sound crazy to say, but you swear his eyes looked like a fiercer shade of blue, like they were lit up, and you’re insanely glad you’re not one of YCU’s defensive players at the moment because you feel fearful of him even just standing on the sidelines.
Your gaze trails back to Coach Yaga, who slowly puts his sunglasses back on but his brows are narrowed tightly as he crosses his arms over his chest tightly.
The “athletic zone”... You’ve heard of it before. A state of pure focus, of peak performance, where an athlete experiences optimal concentration and a sense of effortless control over their actions. In which they perform at their highest level, where time slows down, any and all distractions fade away, and they’re completely immersed in their sport at hand. At the task at hand.
Coach Yaga seems to pick up on the fact that Gojo was on the edge of tapping into that state.
YCU makes a substitution, and you watch in anticipation as they begin the kickoff.
There’s fire in their veins with desperation to even out the score once more, rushing the ball down the off-field line, one of their center forwards mimicking Gojo’s signature attack pattern, and Yuta struggles to keep up with the expert dribbling of a fourth-year player with more experience on him, so much so to where he completely leaves the ball unguarded and there’s an open shot, but Geto places pressure at the last moment, in a fierce battle for the ball, before YCU’s center forward loses the ball over the goal line.
Choso picks the ball up, tapping on it harshly a few times as he surveys his eyes down the field, and all offensive players begin to shuffle towards their attacking goal in anticipation for the goal kick. He signals his hand down and then holds up two fingers in the air before placing the ball down on the six-yard box. He tightens the strap of one of his gloves, eyes squinting, and you follow his gaze down to a part of the field where you note UTokyo’s best aerial players are located and being guarded by YCU’s defense. And with complete trust in his team, that’s exactly where he kicks the ball.
Geto makes first contact with the ball, his chest colliding with two other YCU players as his head comes out on top and he headbutts the ball closer towards the inner field, and Gojo immediately gains access to it with a bounce of his knee. The crowd holds their breath, fear that they’ll lose the ball to a steal in the split second it spends floating in the air, but Gojo urges it forward with a bounce off of his chest and then rushes it straight down towards the goal post.
You wonder what sight he sees right now. Where you’re dead center, at no angle, lunging towards the sight of an open goal with a sole goalie standing in the center, anticipating to block your shot, and three defenders on your tail. There’s no room for error, no time to think, only instincts that you cultivate in the last leading milliseconds. They say that, in sports, athletes channel one hundred hours of practice in just a brief second on the field. A split second success that was years in the making. You can’t even imagine possessing that level of perfection in your body, or possessing that level of confidence that you can follow through with it in a moment as dire as this.
It was unreal, the way Gojo fades away from all the defenders, and faces no fear when confronted with the sight of the goalie in front of him while drawing his foot back to kick the ball. You lift your camera up at the last second, no time to think about aperture or ISO, just like he had no time to second-doubt a single twitch in his muscles, and his foot makes contact with the ball so harshly that you can hear the explosive sound even among the delirious cheers from the crowd, before he hook, line, and sinks it straight past the goalie’s head, rushing by like a scarcely deflected bullet, and into the net behind him.
3-1, UTokyo.
The whole stadium is momentarily speechless, all players and referees and recruiters and reporters and coaches and employees alike, before the most deafening cheers you’ve ever heard in your life scatter across the stands.
There’s a moment of brief reprieve, where the players can catch their breath while YCU makes yet another substitution, as if they’re just trial-and-erroring it at this point, and the cheers in the stadiums remain idle as you can’t tear your gaze away from Gojo.
It’s one of those moments where you realize that someone who you thought was so familiar to you was actually someone you hardly knew at all. You knew he was a talented soccer player, everyone on campus knows it, potentially one of the best to ever grace the league, and the amount of times you passively watched his plays on a lecture hall projector screen as your professor enthusiastically broke them down during class, even before you met him, was good enough for you to realize that he was insane, a one-in-a-million, a talent you cannot replicate, one you have by divinity. One you were born with.
And yet, somehow, getting to know him these past couple of months, he just felt so human. For someone so seemingly beyond you, he felt so…close? In those moments where it was just the two of you, it was hard to imagine that he was capable of such greatness, and that so many people were rooting for him with wholehearted tears in their eyes and cheers from their hearts, because most of the time, when he was with you, he was just a dorky idiot. You find that your heart is beating fast in your chest, that feeling of being unsure of what to do with what you’ve been wanting resurfacing powerfully.
“This is insane,” you hear Minato say from beside you and you jump a little from your thoughts being interrupted.
You twiddle with your camera straps. “I know…almost done with the first half and we’re up 3-1…I thought YCU are number one in offense for the league?”
“Oh, yeah, I mean, yes, that is insane too. But what’s even more insane is that three of the goals so far have been scored by one player.” He tips his chin towards the right sight of the field and you trail his line of sight. “By Gojo Satoru.”
Your brow furrows as you watch Gojo, his hands on his hips and his mouth slightly open as he indulges in a few shallow breaths to gain energy while YCU prepares for kickoff. Three goals, by just one player. Your eyes widen when you realize that is insane, especially for a D1 semi-final qualifying match.
“You know what the divisional record is for most goals scored by a single player during a championship match, y/n?” Minato asks you as he lifts his camera up to take a picture of the area Gojo was standing in.
You shake your head and wait for his response.
He drops his camera down and glances at the photo on his screen. “Four. During Keio Uni vs. Osaka Uni, near the beginning of the tournament back in 1997 by Osaka’s center forward number 24, Yuji Nakazawa. Meaning no one’s managed to beat that record since the new millenia, for a couple decades. Although a few players came close.”
You blink at him, and Minato is jerking his chin over in the direction of Gojo again.
“I think he’s trying to beat the record.”
You can only widen your eyes at Minato in realization, and then the chirp of the referee’s whistle draws everyone’s attention back to the field.
The sports announcers go wild on the speakers, the crowd raving all the same, standing to their feet like the team just won the championship match.
“LADIES AND GENTLEMEN!! We are watching HISTORY in the making!! Gojo Satoru, UTokyo’s very own 3-year consecutive MVP, has scored his 34th goal of the season, highest of any player in this year’s season so far, and is now on the road to beat the league’s long-standing record for most goals scored by a single player in a championship match since 1997!!” And the crowd roars even louder as you stare out at the field in awe.
YCU starts the kickoff following the prompt short chirp of the referee’s whistle, and with two minutes remaining on the clock for the first half, make desperate attempts to book it down the field towards their attacking goal, one of their midfielders making a clumsy attempt to strike the ball to the net in the final minutes of the half, and Choso easily catches it in his arms, right before the buzzer of the timer sounds, and the match moves into halftime.
All of UTokyo’s players immediately flock towards Gojo in sportful glee, finally having a chance to surround him and harass him with harsh pats on his back and ruffles of his hair for his play in the first half. Choso even puts him in a headlock because they all don’t know what else to do with their excitement and adrenaline rushing through their bodies. Their win for today was basically confirmed with the way he was playing.
You catch a glimpse of him through the crowd of people, and he has a boyish grin on his face, reveling in the embarrassing amount of attention from his teammates, that focused look from before dissolving into his normal self again. But you can see through him, as well enough as you’ve learned to at least, and you can tell he’s not satisfied. He’s thinking it’s not enough. There’s still more to be done, and it’s not time to celebrate yet.
His eyes scan down the sideline until they find you.
Your heart jumps a second in your chest. He stands up straighter, despite his teammates still clinging to him, and there’s a twinkle in his eyes when your eyes meet.
Cheerleaders take their place out onto the field, performing their numbers with loud music blaring, and the recruiters seated at their white tables get up to roam across the sidelines in discussion with referees and with Coach Yaga and with whatever players they can sink their greedy teeth into, as well as sneak at refreshments while they’re at it. You can see off to the right that Hana has reunited with Minato and she’s showing him some of the shots she took over at the opponent's side.
UTokyo’s players start to make their way to the benches to grab for towels and drinks of water and to sprawl across in rest, and you hear loud familiar laughter approaching as you watch the players sprawl across the benches, so you avert your eyes towards the source of the sound.
You see Gojo approaching the benches, two of his teammates slung with their arms around him in some type of adrenaline-drunken glee as they talk dramatically and theatrically which Gojo entertains with his own drunk-off-of-adrenaline glee. And you raise an eyebrow at his demeanor when he makes eye contact with you.
“There’s my freaky little photographer,” he says, and he’s standing up straight and—wait, is he puffing his chest out as he makes his way towards you? Oh for fucks sake.
Gojo has always been confident around you, for as long as you can remember, but in the fair few moments he’s been cocky, he’s been a menace. And you can only assume the testosterone-induced high of being on the verge of breaking a league record in front of the entire school then subsequently getting homiesexually praised by his teammates for the better part of the past five minutes, not to mention with the crowd and the reporters feeding his ego with a spoon across the speakers, he’s been transformed into the final boss of cocky.
His teammates surround you too, their hands on their hips as they assess you and Gojo when he meanders right up to you, arms held out to hug you, a sleazy sight you’ve seen probably six times this week, and you feel a rush of warmth in your cheeks as you place a hand on his chest to keep him away.
“You’re sweaty and gross, please stay away from me,” you reprimand him, “this is an expensive lens that is not humidity-proof.”
“Hey, you’re the girl that Kentaro socked in the face with a ball the other day at practice, right?” one of his teammates asks, leaning in towards you to take a closer look at your face.
“Oh yeahhh, ‘cause Satoru wasn’t paying attention,” another one of his teammates chimes in teasingly, hardly heard over the loud remix playing in the background as the cheerleaders continue to perform on the field.
You shrink a little from where you stand. Gojo’s got an irritated look on his face and he’s shrugging his teammate’s elbow off of his shoulder.
“I really hope you’re getting my good angles,” his teammate to the left comments before winking at you, and you purse your lips together.
The one on the right leans in too, looking at your cheek with an assessing look in his eye. “At least it didn’t leave a scar on your cute face—”
Gojo shoves the both of them back and away from you by elbowing them in the chest, and they make deep eugh noises before stepping away and rubbing at their sternums with pouts on their faces.
“Get the fuck away from her,” he grumbles, “she’s mine.”
Your cheeks flush slightly with warmth at the attention, and you watch as his teammates scurry away to adhere to some social hierarchy Gojo seems to possess over them.
You raise an eyebrow at him. “Yours?”
“Yes. Eventually. Whatever, did you see me out there?” he turns his torso towards the field and points behind himself with his thumb, “when I—”
“Oh god, you know what’s soooooooooo super sexy to me?” you interrupt him. “When guys are humble.”
“Oh c’monnn,” he curls his arm around your waist and pulls you to him, to where you stumble a little on grass and he holds you when you fall into him with more clumsiness than grace. “Tell me you aren’t at least impressed by me.”
You pout, because you are, and you’d really like to give him some reassurance and validation, but for some reason his cocky attitude is setting you off. “Satoru,” you sigh, wiggling a little in his hug, but he holds you tighter, “I’m working right now. Cut it out.”
He lets go of you at that, sober enough from the adrenaline to realize you’re being serious, but he steps into your space so only you can hear him. “What? Are you embarrassed?”
“Of what?” Your face twists with confusion.
“Of me. Are you embarrassed of me?” he asks.
“No. Why would I be embarrassed of you?” you ask with sharpness.
“I don’t know, just, sometimes I feel like you’re always annoyed by me,” he says with a sigh. “It’s like, you’re really sweet sometimes, and then kinda rude out of nowhere, and it’s sort of messing with my head.”
You pout. “You were messing with my head for weeks.”
“And I’m sorry about that,” he quickly interjects, like he already knew you were brewing up that counterargument, “but you don’t have to act like you’re all disinterested and indifferent just to get back at me for it.” He places his hands on his hips and wipes his temple on the round part of his shoulder when he feels a drop of sweat trickle down from his hairline. “You don’t have to act embarrassed around me either.”
“I’m not embarrassed,” you deny, and your cheeks feel hot, and for some reason you feel angry. “In fact, I’m the one that should be asking you that question. Because I still very clearly remember that time you said I was just someone you know in front of your friends.”
He groans and tilts his head back with frustration. “Can you just let that go? Things have changed between us since then. Move on.”
“You kissed me and then pretended I was just a stranger to you in front of your friends,” you grit as you cross your arms. “That’s the level of sincerity that I know from you, Satoru.”
“Oh, okay, so there’s nothing else I’ve done that shows you that I’m serious about you?” he asks rhetorically with incredulity, throwing his hands up in the air in disbelief.
No. That’s not true, not true at all. But he’s pissed you off now and so all logic was to the wind. “Doesn’t matter. If you’re not embarassed of me, and if you’re really serious about me this time, then fucking prove it.” You’re speaking out of spite, and you fear you’ve just set him off too.
“Fine,” he says, and he grabs the microphone straight out from a passing reporter’s hand, replacing it with a gatorade bottle. The reporter stares at the bottle he’s now holding with confusion. “I will.”
“W-Wait—” you squeak out, feeling the hair at the back of your neck bristle in anticipation and a shiver gets sent down your spine. The cheerleaders are making their way off the field at the end of their routine, and you can hear the thumps across the loud boisterous speakers when Gojo whacks his palm to the microphone to make sure the thing was on before he jogs to the center of the field.
The crowd is already cheering, ecstatic to see the afternoon's star player and pride & joy of their school, and Gojo takes a moment to soak in all the glory in comical appreciation with bowing towards all 360 degree angles of the stadium.
“Uhhh,” you hear Choso from beside you, who’s strapping his thick goalie gloves tightly to his wrists, “Why the fuck does Satoru have a microphone while standing in the middle of the field.”
“It can’t be for any publicly decent reason,” Geto muses.
All you can do is watch.
“Hi, uh,” Gojo starts, static blaring slightly across the speakers and the crowd winces with him, “sorry. I’m Satoru, Gojo Satoru, you might know me from—uh, the game you’ve been watching?”
Cheers all around, because as if a single person wouldn’t know who he is. The stands were rowdy and most definitely drunk off of sidestep beers the stadium has been serving all afternoon long.
Gojo is about to continue speaking, when he catches sight of the table of recruiters in the corner of his eye and he turns to face them out of respect. “Oh, yeah, uh, number 10,” he tugs his jersey up at the shoulder to stretch out the fabric, the 1 and the 0 flattened in view, “division player ID 233-997. Coach Yaga keeps my business cards in his purse if you want one.”
“SAAAAATTOOORRUUUU!!!!!” you hear Coach Yaga yell from somewhere in the distance.
“Anywho,” Gojo continues, and the music dims slightly, so he glances at the stop clock on the screen, which shows him he’s got roughly five minutes left to pull off whatever idiocracy he had in mind before the second half of the game starts. “Just here to say that there’s this girl I really like.”
The crowd gets louder, almost deafening, and sonically mostly feminine in (delusional) hope he’s gonna name call one of them.
Gojo’s voice is crisp and clear through the speakers as he clarifies. “She’s standing over there,” he says as he nonchalantly points to your exact latitude and longitudinal direction, “with the big camera slung around her neck that looks like it could pull her down to the center of the earth. Yeah. She’s super cute and I really like talking to her.”
“Uh-oh,” Geto murmurs from beside you, and you glance at him to try to get a read on the situation but you can’t.
Gojo starts to pace across the center of the field now, like he’s working the crowd. “But get this—she thinks I’m not fuckin’ serious about her!!!”
The crowd groans with him in unison. Yep, most certainly drunk. Or high off of glee. Either way, he’s playing them like a violin.
“Huh?” Gojo’s voice sounds distant now, away from the mic, and you can see on the large pixelated screen that he’s being interrupted by someone that looks like one of the videographers, “oh, what’s that? This is being broadcasted? Uh-huh. Oh. I’m not allowed to cuss? Oh fuck, okay. Er— shit, okay. Wait—shoot, okay.”
Choso’s smirk is heard from beside you, and you catch Geto and Nanami shaking their heads in your periphery.
“LIKE I SAID,” Gojo continues into the mic, “the girl I like thinks I’m just messing around, so. Uh. To show her that I’m serious about her, I’m gonna…” He looks up at the sky to ponder, and you can hear people shouting all sorts of suggestions of nonsense from the crowd. And instead of saying proclaim my undying affection for her through a romantic soliloquy straight from my heart in the presence of the entire school, he says—“I’m gonna strip. Yes. Down to my tighty whities, Imma strip.”
H–
Huh?!?!?
You don’t even have time to be horrified or scared, you’re just bewildered beyond belief that that’s what he came up with.
What the fuck kind of reassurance did you ask for. And what the fuck kind of reassurance were you about to get?
The crowd goes wild, it’s no surprise to say everyone and their mothers wants to see him naked, even the straight dudes would dig it for the gym inspo. And he points straight to you, sleazy look on his face and you’re going to ignore the fact that he just winked at you too as he crosses his arms to hold the hem of his jersey and pulls it up over his head in the most raunchy and slutty way a man can take his shirt off.
The music manager is quick with the bit, and is most definitely a fellow Gen Z college student, because Justin Timberlake’s SexyBack (ft. Timbaland) starts playing across the speakers and the crowd goes ballistic.
“Ayo why’s Satoru Magic Mike’ing the field right now?” one of his other teammates calls out through a mouthful of protein bar, “What the fuck did I miss?”
The cameraman does God’s work in a hella zoom-in of Gojo’s sweat glistened abs, then pans up the naked expanse of the perfect taut skin across his chest, and you can’t help but stare even among all your horror. It’s like when a male bird embarrasses the fuck outta himself to attract a female bird sitting on a perch, except instead of within the context of a NatGeo documentary, this was your real life. Everyone wants him, but he’s making a fool out of himself for you.
He pretends to stretch his arms up into the air, a cover-up to flex his biceps, and then he kicks his cleats off, and the socks come off too. Entirely unnecessary, as showing one's ankles is simply too slutty, but alas he’s a whore. And when his thumbs dip into the waistband of his shorts, and there’s anticipating screeching from the crowd, he finally gets chased by security.
Except he’s an intercollegiate D1 athlete, why the fuck wouldn’t he be able to outrun a bunch of dudes in black?
The camerawork on him is phenomenal as he runs across the sidelines of the field, eliciting a wave down the bleachers. So good in fact that you’re pretty sure the camera man could shoot for the Olympic track and field, with the way the stadium’s got a clear sight of Gojo mouthing the lyrics Them other fuckers don’t know how to act from the song still blaring with satirical rage on his face as he makes a fool of the men chasing him around the perimeter of the field.
And then he does it, drops his shorts, discards them with a kick, and he’s down to his tighty whities as promised. Cameraman has got to be displaying some previously undiscovered level of talent as he zeroes in on a shot of said tighty whities, with Gojo’s—forgive me, I need to be crass—huge bulge prominent in Big Dick Energy fashion except his tighty whities have little red hearts in rows across the fabric so do with that duality what you will.
He’s outrun security with a steady grin on his face as he eats up the drunken crowd’s cheers and riots and roars and you feel like you’re the only sane person in this stadium, or maybe you’re just not used to the fanatics of a college sports crowd. You peep the men in black trailed all the way on the left side of the field where they abandoned their pursuit of Gojo.
He taps imaginary pockets at his thighs, very muscular thighs you take indulgence in noticing, as if he expected to find something there, and he looks around when he doesn’t. He shrugs and grabs the microphone of the next passing sports commentator he spots, and then he makes his way back to you.
His breathing is a little shallow, and he inhales deep to catch his breath. “Baby.” The crowd SCREAMS at the way he purrs the word into the mic. “Will you do me the honor,” he’s huffing and puffing, heard across blaring speakers, “of being my lawfully wedded girlfriend?” And then he holds the mic to your lips.
“W-Wha—” you stutter, and there’s chanting across the crowd with words that barely make sense until you finally realize they’ve started to yell say yes! say yes! say yes! “Oh my gosh, okay, yes, fine, now please, for the love of god, put some freaking clothes on!”
The crowd goes wild with cheerful glees, and Gojo shoots fists up in the air in celebration as he runs all the way towards the center of the field with high knees, and you’re gawking at the sight, before he falls backward onto the grass and makes delirious snow angels on the ground. You see Coach Yaga’s vein popping in his neck from pure agitation as he storms off towards the center of the field to knock some sense into Gojo, but you know that Coach Yaga can’t kick him out, because they still have a game to win. The perks of being the most valued player in the league is getting to act like an absolutely insane idiot because you know they still need you in the end to bring it home.
You glance to the right, seeing his teammates nodding slowly then getting back to wrapping athletic tape around ankles and stretching out shoulders, with immediate acceptance of his actions like it wasn’t even out of character for him to do. And you realize again that you don’t know Gojo as well as you think you do.
And then the halftime timer is up.
You see Gojo approach the benches in a quick jog, squeezing some water into his mouth with his green gatorade squirt bottle, and when your eyes flit up to the screens on all four entrances, you see that the cameramen are still all focused on him accompanied by the continued buzz of conversation among the crowd following his public spectacle. But he seems to already be past any semblance of embarrassment as he takes the attention with ease, before he glances up to make eye contact with you and then lightly jogs right up to you.
“Did that prove to you that I’m not embarrassed of you?” he asks you, cocking a brow with a smug look on his face as he gets all up in your personal space.
“I don’t know, but I’m certainly thoroughly and expeditiously embarrassed of you now,” you say, cheeks feeling flush when he leans forward so he can make eye contact with you at eye level. “I’ll have to move to a different country.”
His grin is relaxed. “Yeah well you asked for it.”
“Maybe. But I underestimated what a lunatic you are.”
“You’re my girlfriend now, you’ve gotta get used to it.”
Your heart skips a beat in your chest. “Satoru–”
“Tomorrow,” he cuts you off, “Hinode pier. I’ll pick you up at six. It’s a date, so wear something cute. And preferably easy to take off.” And then he’s attentive to the chirp of the referee’s whistle in the air before jogging backwards towards the feel and eventually turns on his heel towards the field while you’re left with warm cheeks and a heart that felt like it was moving at a mile a minute.
The timer for the second half refreshes on the screen while you loosely hold your camera in your shaking hands. It occurs to you that you haven’t taken a single photo of him before the start of the kickoff, and so you bring the piece of consolidated metal up to your eyes, peering through the viewfinder and focusing it on the center of the field. And there he was. Your muse.
Gojo lets out a breath, which you can see even from here that it’s shaky and staggered with resistance, and he lifts his jersey up to swipe at the sweat trickling down his face as he eyes the ball underneath YCU’s player’s foot just prior to the start of the second half. There it was—that look again of pure focus.
3-1, forty-five minutes on the clock. And the referee chirps the whistle to start the second half.
It’s immediately evident that YCU has returned to the field following halftime with renewed energy, pressing high down the flank relentlessly past UTokyo’s defense, so fast it was hard for anybody to even keep a steady eye on the ball with the fluidity of their passes. The persistence pays off in the fake double-pass that slips past Geto’s feet, a moment of hesitation in the broken flow of UTokyo’s defense, and one of YCU’s strikers has the perfect line of shot towards the goal before digging his foot under the ball and sending it flying towards the corner of the goal post, scoring themselves a goal within just the first five minutes of play.
3-2.
The pressure mounts at the next kickoff, and with about seven minutes of solid play, with back-and-forth passes, multiple attempts at both goal posts to no avail on either side, it was clear that exhaustion was bustling in the veins of all the players.
One of YCU’s offensive players seems to capitalize on this, jumping on a defensive lapse of a pass Nanami attempted to make towards Yuta, and the ball is swiftly stolen then raced back towards the goal post. Choso prepared himself at the line, light on his feet paired with a solid stance, but in a millisecond of a moment, YCU’s offense unexpectedly passes the ball to a player racing up the midfield, and the player chips the ball neatly into the exposed corner of the goal despite Choso’s attempt to lunge for it in mid air.
Equalized, 3-3 game, momentary shock across the players’ faces, and the crowd bustles with something that sounds less like glee and more life fear. YCU was prepared to live up to and hold onto their title as the league’s number one offense, and as Minato explained to you during your time working in this job, an offensive team isn’t good at scoring goals, but rather exceptional at breaking down the other team’s defense.
Your eyes zero in on Geto, who stands in the center of the field for kickoff, and he’s huffing and puffing. He's the lead of defense for the team, and you can only imagine the level of pressure he feels right now. He glances around to his players, over to Nanami who seemed to share the same level of exhaustion, and then he glances towards Gojo who stood in front of him off to the right. Except you notice that Gojo looks relaxed, albeit still exhausted, but there’s a composed expression on his face even in the moment of heightened stakes. With locked eyes, Geto nods at Gojo and raises two fingers up into the air to signal a play, of which Gojo seems to respond to by closing more distance between him and the goal post prior to the kickoff, positioning himself almost directly in front of it, to which YCU’s defense immediately begin to guard him in a tight radius.
The kickoff begins, with Geto making a few passbacks with Nanami as they close distance towards the field before passing it off to UTokyo’s string of offense and then receding back to their defending goal. UTokyo continues to close distance, raising stakes for YCU as their defense begins to falter under pressure, and the ball gets passed to Gojo, who only keeps it in possession for less than three seconds before he passes it back to Yuuji, a risky decision to make in the second half of a semifinal match, but the first-year swiftly unleashes a powerful shot that rockets past YCU’s goalkeeper, up towards the corner, except–
It bounces off the metal of the goal post, shot off with projectile speed back towards the center of the field, but with razor-sharp reflexes, Gojo headbutts the ball in air, twists his torso and strikes the ball with his foot past a dumbfounded goalie who can’t even move an inch to guard the ball that he already knew was going to sink right into the goal, and that’s exactly what it does.
The stadium erupts with the momentum.
4-3, UTokyo.
It was a sweet moment, one you manage to capture on camera of Gojo running up to Yuuji and ruffling his hair in reassurance, despite the missed goal. Your heart feels warm in your chest, feeling your own sense of melancholy that this was one of the last times they’ll ever get to play together on a team.
Your eyes widen when you glance at the scoreboard, realizing that he’s tied. Gojo is tied for the most goals scored during a championship match. There were less than three minutes left on the clock. UTokyo either preserves their lead, or they risk moving into overtime, which, judging by the exhaustion on the UTokyo players’ faces in the wake of YCU’s relentless offense this entire game, moving into overtime would be a hefty, hefty risk.
YCU’s center forward takes his place in the center of the field, fire evident in his eyes as he glances across the field. YCU are light on their feet, channeling everything in their bodies into these last moments of the game as they prepare to start the kickoff. You glance across UTokyo’s players, and although they look spent, there was a resolute look to all of them. It wasn’t the time to give up or feel at ease even near the end of this grueling battle. Now was the time to play.
The referee chirped his whistle, and the kickoff began.
YCU immediately presses hard, as all their other plays have been all game, in their desperation to score. You can already see UTokyo’s midfielders move sluggishly in comparison to YCU’s offense, a drag to their feet as YCU pushes past the first layer of defense towards their attacking goal. Geto takes an aggressive approach, making moves to steal the ball while Nanami and Yuta guarded both flanks, and there was a relentless pass-off happening that ate up more than a minute of the remaining time.
Nanami succeeds in stealing the ball, but immediately loses it under his feet by a YCU midfielder, who makes a broad pass down the sidelines to YCU’s star forward who then powerfully kicks the ball towards the unguarded area of their goal, a dangerous shot that was clear towards the crossbar and Choso makes a leap for it, high into the air, his glove brushing against the ball, the entire crowd holding their breath in anticipation–
And the ball lands in the net.
4-4, tied game. With one minute and seventeen seconds left on the clock.
There was no time wasted in getting back to center field. No time spent dwelling in the horrific roars of the crowd as they watch with anxiety and fear. No time spent to process or consider or signal any plays. Not even a single second used to catch breath. When there is this much at stake, an athlete thrives on momentum.
To your surprise, Gojo isn’t the one that takes place at the center of the field to start the kickoff. Yuta stands there instead, and you notice his eyes are erratic as he surveys all corners of the field.
The referee chirps his whistle.
Yuta immediately passes it off to the side to UTokyo’s midfielder, who curls it towards their attacking goal with a swift pass to Ino, who closes distance towards the goal, but one of YCU’s defender slips in, undoing any progress they had made in their offense by stealing the ball and sending it back towards mid-field. Forty-three seconds. The crowd’s roars heightened as YCU continued to push forward, thirty yards now from scoring, and UTokyo’s defense was desperate to stop them but their momentum was cracking in the wake of their exhaustion.
It was a moment you don’t think you could ever fully or truly recall, one that you wish you had focused all your energy and attention to so that you could commit it to memory for the rest of your life. The image of Gojo pushing all the way to ten yards before their defending goal, a place where no center forward should really be at in a game like this, but it was exactly what their defense needed. It was exactly what the team needed. It was exactly what the school needed. For the ball to be in his possession.
With twenty-two seconds left on the clock, he steals the ball from right under YCU’s offensive feet, and then charges towards the opposite side of the field. The crowd rises to their feet, thunderous roaring that overtook any and all senses, as Gojo weaves through forwards, center forwards, midfielders, and defenders, covering the entire span of the field in lightning time. Fifty yards, forty yards, thirty yards, twenty hards, ten yards–
In a moment you couldn’t believe, he digs his foot underneath the ball, and sends it flying out towards the goal. There was not even a margin of an inch in which it slipped past the goalie’s hands, past his head, and swiftly flew right into the net.
With three-two-one seconds, the match was over.
5-4, UTokyo’s win.
The final whistle blew, and for a moment, there was silence. As if the world paused to catch its breath. Then, all at once, the crowd erupted with glee that shook the entire stadium at its core. Flags waving, scarves held high, toasts of beer held up to the sky, it was deafening, and it almost makes you want to cry. Thousands of voices shouting in unison, celebrating the hard-fought victory of their school’s team. A type of pride that was fostered, and well-deserved, and long-lived.
You quickly glance towards the field again, and see Gojo standing right at the same spot where he had kicked the last and final goal, staring towards the net. You can’t see the expression on his face, but it surprises you how still he is. Like a statue, staring at the goal with the ball tucked into its corner. The very epitome of what it means to succeed in this sport was right in front of him, and it seemed like he wanted to soak the visual in for as long as he could.
His trance is abruptly interrupted when his teammates swarm in, rushing over like a wave of pure adrenaline. They slap him on the back, ruffle his hair, shout his name, the sounds of gleeful disbelief mixed with exhausted sighs of relief swarming into the air. And Gojo finally melts away from the tension of the match and into the celebration as he weakly returns the embraces of his teammates while he catches his breath.
“IT’S OFFICIAL!! IT’S OFFICIAL!! UTOKYO’S VERY OWN GOJO SATORU HAS OBLITERATED OSAKA UNIVERSITY’S RECORD FOR MOST GOALS SCORED BY A SINGLE PLAYER IN A CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH!!”
The speakers are blaring the voices of the sports announcers, along with ambient music to match the intensity of the match that everyone had just witnessed.
You should probably be doing your job. You know, take a picture of the huddle of players on the field as they bask in the glory of a close victory, but instead your feet start moving on their own. Like a magnet drawn to him, you make your way towards Gojo, only a slight hesitation in your step as you stop about ten feet away, suddenly unsure. But when he makes eye contact with you, all that fear melts away.
He hastily pats the backs of some of his teammates, acknowledging their praise at the center of the huddle before tightly squeezing past them to make his way over to you. Your heart is beating fast in your chest, feeling an almost overwhelming sense of pride in your school’s team, but more importantly, in him. What was the acceptable thing to do? Run to him, into his arms, and hug him while he twirls you around? Tackle him to the grassy ground? Kiss him like your life depended on it? You have no clue what the acceptable or sane or normal thing to do is. But he’s made his decision for you when he walks right up to you, his hands holding your waist as he pulls you towards him. He smells earthy, of grass and salt and sweat and of all the hard work he poured into today, the wear and tear of the game evident in the wear and tear of his jersey. He only manages to huff out an exhale at the sight of you, like some relief washing over him just by looking into your eyes. Forget the fact that the crowd was all watching and that all of the screens you could see past his head were focused on the two of you, because all you could hear or see or think was him.
“I believe you owe me a kiss,” he says, huffing as he catches his breath but that doesn’t stop the smile that makes its way onto his face.
You nod your head, giving him your own version of a sweet smile as your arms slide up past his shoulders, crossing behind his neck, and he leans down to kiss you.
You hear a swell from the crowd, some teasing comments off in the distance from some of his teammates, you’re pretty sure you hear Coach Yaga yelling at him to get back to the benches, but it all melts away with the feeling of him smiling against your lips as he kisses you at the center of this stadium.
It was a moment so pure, so sweet, so picture perfect, and for once, you’re not the one behind the camera taking the photo. You’re the one that’s in it.
.
.
.
.
.
[end of kickoff ch12]
a/n. aaa thanks a lot for reading!! pls the fucking public stripping scene was so stupid i apologize on behalf of kickoff gojo for his behavior 😂😂 i’ll put him in his cage dw this chapter had some of what i consider to be the most challenging aspects of writing for me (internal conflict, grand public gesture, sports jargon) and so writing it felt like an uphill battle the ENTIRE time i wrote it and edited it. i considered scrapping it sooo many times cuz i just wasn't happy w it...but whatever i can't expect to be 100% happy w every chapter i put out there haha. i think kickoff has become a lil sacred for me since i've been working on it for a while now but likeee...sometimes u just gotta say fuck it we ball (tbh kickoff gojo probably says that to himself before a match) anywho, i am veryy thoroughly excited for what i've got planned for the chapters to follow, especially moving into the last angsty arc before the end of the series!! so i look forward to picking up momentum w this series again :0 honestly chapters 10 through 12 were the most difficult things i've written so far for a lot of reasons, but i have a feeling things will go more smoothly for me creatively going forward since what i've got planned falls well within my writing comfort range oh also there seems to be a little confusion about the number of chapters left, as i know i had originally said 12, but i anticipate that there will be about 18 chapters of kickoff total!! so still around six chapters left before the end :)) much lovee thanks for reading!!
OH WAIT ONE LAST NOTE I'M SORRY i didn’t really have a way of organically incorporating this into the story n i’m not sure if i’ll get a chance to in the upcoming chapters, so i just wanted to share this part of ch7 (gojo’s pov chapter) that is relevant to this chapter:
During the thrilling semifinal match between Keio Uni, Gojo’s father’s team, and Yokohama Uni during the end of his senior year, spectators witnessed a game that most college soccer enthusiasts would deem was a once-in-a-lifetime watch. Both teams engaged in relentless offense, and Gojo’s father was on his way to shatter the record of the most goals scored in a single championship match within the history of the league, but when he received a call from his wife during a timeout with the most life-altering news he could have ever heard, he abandoned everything on the field that day to go home and be with her. Grainy footage from the televised broadcast still exists online today—the moment he sprinted across the field, confused players glancing in his direction, amidst the uproar of the crowd. She called to let him know she was pregnant.
the record that gojo broke in this chapter is the same record that his father almost broke before he got the call that he was going to be a dad :0
➸ you're all caught up!
additional notes. please do not pressure me for updates or ask when i will next update (read rules); taglist is currently closed (consider subscribing to the story on my ao3 for email updates if you'd like! :0)
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[taglist is closed]
#jujutsu kaisen#jujutsu kaisen fanfiction#gojo satoru#gojo x reader#gojo x reader smut#gojo x reader fluff#gojo x reader angst#gojo satoru smut#gojo satoru fluff#gojo satoru angst#jjk gojo#jjk fanfiction#smut#angst#fluff#geto suguru#nanami kento#choso kamo#college au#sports au#series#alternative universe#jjk series#long fic#jjk smut#romance#slow burn#kickoff#fanfiction#anime
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── only if you say yes. ( psh ) 🪽
๑ When trying out a dumb trend online with your best friend turns into something neither of you were very much experienced in at all..
pair: best friend!sunghoon ㅊ f!reader | warnings: smut, pwp, fluff, lots and lots of kissinggg, you’re both virgins lol, kinda subby!hoon, dry humping, hoon cries a little bit, surprise ending ?? | words: 2.1k
✦ . ⁺ . ✦ . ⁺ . ✦
“uhh.. y’sure best friends are allowed to be doing this ?” sunghoon murmurs against the heat of your skin as you got dangerously closer. you boldly straddled his lap, telling him that you want to plant kisses all over his face with a fresh coat of pink gloss adorning your lips.
the idea randomly sprung into your head as you were watching some tiktok video about ‘covering my boyfriend’s face with lipstick kiss marks to see his reaction’ but… you didn’t have a boyfriend. you never really liked any of the gross, annoying boys at your school nor had a crush on anyone before. well, besides for one boy— the only boy you ever really cared about was sunghoon, who’s been your best friend since childhood and shared almost everything with.
the two of you were just casually sitting on your bed like usual, both your parents were gone as they had some important business meeting to attend to, leaving you both bored out of your minds with absolutely nothing better to do. you’ve always thought about kissing your best friend and how he’d react if you did it, would he be surprised ? upset ? angry ? turned on ? who the hell knows, but one thing you knew for certain was that you wanted to share your first kiss with him and only him.
“i don’t see why not, i mean.. unless you don’t want me to ?” your round eyes sparkle up at sunghoon as you ask him for permission.
the boy was far too flustered to speak, blushing softly as he gets shy and looks away, his eyes scanning the perimeters of your room. he looks at the soft pastel pink walls, your shelf full of books, random stationary, and the stuffed plushies that you’ve collected over the years. sunghoon knows practically everything about you, he knows that you’ve always liked cute things and how you’re so obsessed with all things pink and dress on the hyperfeminine side. he loves how innocent you are and how you still believe in the tooth fairy or the fact you have to sleep with a star projecting nightlight because you’re too afraid of the dark. he quite literally thought you were the most adorable, precious little thing to have ever graced this earth.
“uh, of course i want to..” “just wanted to make sure is all.” he replies awkwardly, the more cool and collected response in his head didn’t go quite as planned…
with that, your pink tinted glossy lips scattered kisses onto his rosy cheeks. the feeling of your breasts brushing up against sunghoon’s chest making him whimper, the only thing covering your nipples being the thin camisole you wore. your lips start to mark him on every spot of his face, kissing his little moles one by one. you especially loved the mole near the bridge of his nose and the one under his eye, everything just screamed perfection about him from head to toe.
you start to giggle as you find it funny that your lip marks are printed all over your best friend’s face. the way your warmth from your body heat combined with your cinnamon scented perfume only becomes stronger whenever your lips are near his face, it makes his mind all frizzy. he couldn’t think straight, he couldn’t even believe this was happening. he truly thought he was dreaming; but it was too lifelike to feel like a dream.
“you look s’cute !” you smothered a dozen more kisses along his jaw through your words.
you smiled like a giddy teenager as you pull away from sunghoon’s face, bringing your hand mirror to his face so he can see all the kiss marks you drowned him in. for some reason it felt natural to him, he was happy to have your marks on his face; he’d walk around in public with your kiss marks on his face and wouldn’t have a care in the world of what others would say/think. there’s no one else he’d rather be doing this right now with than you.
“what’s on your mind hoonie ?” you ask all innocently, wondering why he’s been so quiet this whole time.
sunghoon doesn’t say much of anything in return, instead he grabs your face and crashes his lips against yours. you didn’t know the first thing about kissing, neither did he to be honest, but he’s watched enough romance movies and k-dramas to get the gist. your eyes widen at the fact that your own best friend you’ve known since birth has his lips on yours right now. they felt soft, so plush, and molded so perfectly with yours. you never wanted this to end, you simply could kiss his pretty lips all damn day. you were caught off guard when he abruptly pulls away, he opens his eyes and sees how in shock you are. he panics at the idea of you getting mad at him but he doesn’t say a word. he’s not exactly sure what to say..
“o-oh sorry.. i just really wanted to know what it’d feel like to have your lips on mine. you’re making me.. feel all these strange things inside..” god, he feels like such an idiot. he feels as though he’s blew any chance of redemption but is quickly surprised when you pull the collar of his t-shirt to reel him back in for another passionate kiss. he doesn’t even hesitate to melt into you, you were like a drug to him, more addictive than any substance could ever be.
๑ ๑ ๑
it wasn’t long until you found yourself back on sunghoon’s lap, making out with him for what seems like hours. you didn’t know what the hell you were doing but you were doing what your natural instincts were telling you and so was he. you felt an odd sensation throughout your body, something you’ve never felt before.
all you knew was that you needed some more friction, so you rocked your hips against sunghoon’s clothed erect, feeling him grow under your thin little shorts. it felt so weird but so good at the same time, the way he ruts his hips to be in sync with your movement, how it makes your whole body tingle, your pussy was throbbing, aching for more. both you and sunghoon made the most needy, whimpering sounds against each other’s lips.
“can we do it more ? can.. can you rub yourself on me again ?. it feels so so good y/n, i can’t take it ! i need it.. need to feel you on me please please please,” sunghoon’s whines were making your heart flutter. he was just so cute ;( he may be a couple years older, taller, and a lot stronger than you, yet he was always so soft and gentle towards you.
“mm.. of course hoonie, just be good for me m’kay?” you wanted him to be a good boy for you, you wanted him to let you take care of him.
he obediently nods at your words before you quickly get off of his lap and signal him to lay down flat on your bed. you shove the millions of sanrio plushies out of the way and make sure sunghoon’s head is comfortably laying on your fluffy body pillow, it was a must to have sunghoon feeling well at all times. it definitely wasn’t in the ‘women are made to take care of men!’ bullshit kind of way but in the way that even though he’s older, taller, and stronger than you he’s still your baby. he’d do anything for you, as you would do the same for him, so that’s why he obeys so easily, he knows you’ll take good care of him.
“you look so beautiful” sunghoon whispers as you begin to slowly take your clothing off, you were left in just your white camisole and your floral panties with a cute pink bow on the front.
“lemme take your shirt off hoonie,” he nods so you take off the oversized black t-shirt, leaving him in just his sweatpants.
you could tell sunghoon wasn’t wearing any underwear especially because you can see the outline of his bulge so well, so one tug of his sweatpants and his cock will be exposed. you eye his beautiful body, how toned and muscular he was… not to mention how defined his abs looked, you’ve seen them before many times, but not like this. your manicured fingers drag across his abs, he attempts to hide his face by turning to the side but you softly grab him, cupping his chin so he could face you once again.
“don’t— i wanna look at you hoon, and you want me to do that thing again, right?” you ask him sweetly as you tilt your head, not wanting to make him feel uncomfortable.
“please. i don’ wanna sound rude but stop talking and do it again… i like feeling you so close to me.” a pout forms on his lips, so desperate and horny for you that he was sure he’d nut the second you grind on him again.
it wasn’t long when you crawl on sunghoon’s laying figure. you’re now on top of him, your core pressed against his bulge that was harder than before. you feel your lower area grow excessively wet, it was clenching around nothing. you look down at sunghoon, his eyes giving you the most pleading, innocent look. you smile at him before you start to move against him, the whines slip out of his lips so easily. you see the way he closes his eyes, the way his lips part open as he lets out soft moans for your ears to drown in.
his hands fly to your hips and slightly grips them, something tells you he wants you to move faster. you plant your hands on his chest and move your clothed pussy against his hard faster, your teeth sunk into your bottom lip as you moan at the way your clit was being stimulated by the friction. it wasn’t long until you and sunghoon both felt this strange feeling bubbling inside your stomachs, it was like a fire in your lower abdomen.. a good fire.
“hoon.. w-what is going on.. i feel weird— oh my god!” you screech as you felt yourself release warm liquid out of your pussy.
sunghoon saw the way you were slightly shaking on him, how your face twitched, how beautiful you looked when you reached your climax. soon sunghoon felt himself cream in his pants, his eyes teary from the pleasure. he sniffles as you wipe the wetness from his face.. he’s so cute. at first he thought he pissed himself until he realized it was the same liquid that comes out when he thinks about you at night. what did they call it.. cum ?? he searched it up before but he really didn’t understand it much, maybe he’ll ask you to look it up with him tomorrow.
“we should.. do that again more often..” sunghoon says to you, your body collapsed besides his, hugging him from his side. he hugs you back, he feels so close to you.. like you two are one.
your lips found their way back onto his again, subconsciously rubbing up against him again. sunghoon couldn’t help but smile to himself at how much you wanted to feel him, although he was a bit worn out he wouldn’t be opposed to going another round with you on top of him again.
you and sunghoon were enjoying each other’s company, living in the moment as you embraced one another. what you hadn’t come to realize though, were the 4 adults that happened to be both of your parents standing utterly still in shock at the door.. completely dumbfounded.
“sunghoon ? y/n ?? what are you two doing ?!” your eyes widen along with sunghoon’s as you both heard the sudden loudness of your mother’s voice.
“my baby isn’t a baby anymore, oh my gosh !” sunghoon’s mother squeals, she knew that he’s had a crush on you but he never told you. this little kiss you two shared has now basically confirmed that you were also just as much as in love with him as he was with you.
you look at your doorway and see your father, no emotion on his face whatsoever.. he doesn’t seem angry or sad he just seems… unamused ? your mother had her hand over her mouth, sunghoon’s father trying not to burst out laughing and sunghoon’s mom was over the moon that her son is finally experiencing adulthood with a girl.
you’d expect scolding from both of your parents but really they knew this was bound to happen between you two one day, they were childhood best friends themselves, hell, they all used to be friends and now they’re married with children.
guess it was safe to say, you’d be able to give sunghoon kisses all over his face without having to hide it from anyone !
admittedly this isn’t my best work buttt i rlly thought the storyline was cute so i hope some of you enjoyed it nonetheless >-< ♡︎ ♡︎ also here’s a qt little visual of what y/n was doing to hoonie pie in the beginning ehehe <3
#enhypen smut#sunghoon smut#enhypen x reader#enhypen scenarios#enhypen imagines#sunghoon x reader#enhypen drabbles#sunghoon hard thoughts#enha smut
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.
#managed to access my twidder from 2017 when id met this one guy and we havent talked since 2018 lol.#and he was still following me even tho that account has like 3 tweets lmao#anyway i searched his profile and he's apparently a lowkey lewis fan?#has the most sane takes about placeyear race. i think he likes mclaren more now?#and he's in japan doing photography#i think ive blocked him from my insta yrs ago for some reason i dont remember now but idk it always surprises me how much of a person#i have missed. what else did he like. talk about. what else did he feel? what kind of world was i living at to miss these details?#anyway feeling sentimental bc i literally met him at that stage of my life when i was just changing n he opened me up to a lot of things#like after everything is said and done he changed my life so. i guess that's life.
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i'm so sorry i don't want to be the "the party ended 5 years ago and he's still here" person but dark phoenix's final scene is still SO funny to me. especially to see how erik plays charles like a fiddle
like: he shows up with NO helmet AND a chess set. (he did this last time in days of the future past, and it worked, right? so it should work again, right? right???)
so, he sits, completely uninvited mind you, and he tries (and fails terribly bless his heart) at starting a normal conversation, he asks charles about his retirement, probably trying to get charles to like, talk about it or whatever
(rip erik's hairline)
charles is not having any of it, which... valid. the last time he and erik had a full conversation, erik told him to shut the fuck up
anyways, erik realizes his failed attempt at being casual did NOT work like he wanted, so he pulls out plan b - he calls charles his old friend (which, if you pay attention, in the prequels they use 'old friend' as a term to de-escalate the situation)
which WORKS, for some reason, and charles immediately deflates and gives erik the tiniest smile in existence, because erik showing he cares always seems to do it for charles lmao
(he's so embarrassing . god bless. @ x men: is this your leader)
anyhow, erik pulls out the second part of his plan b - he asks charles if he wants to play a game. still playing casual. just two buddies. just two guys. some guys. just some friends having a toootal normal n casual conversation.
and you can immediately see charles close himself up, he crosses his arms and avoids looking erik in the eye. erik managed to soften him up with the 'old friend' and having his helmet off, but it's not enough YET so erik pulls out his plan c. luckily his last one, christ, charles really does like to keep them waiting doesn't he
keep an eye on erik's entire demeanor in this scene, his position is not closed off like charles', he's open, he leans on the table, and maintains eye contact with charles. his head is tilted to one side and everything, completely harmless
i'm so obsessed with charles' microexpressions here james mcavoy you are so insane
anwyays, charles uncrosses his arms and his position does come off a little more open, but if you watch the scene you can see him shake his head. this obviously touches him - but he's probably intending to say still no. probably because he has the biggest martyr complex i've ever seen in a fictional character
so, erik pulls up his fucking plan d (lol) and hopefully this time IT WILL be the last. he pulls the pawn out of his jacket pocket.
(why the fuck is this played like a fucking romantic scene i'm so serious, why is he smiling to himself like that)
mind you, erik had the pawn in his pocket the entire time, which could mean either of two things:
charles looks surprised/confused the entire scene, but in THIS part he doesn't look confused, he just looks like he's still trying to figure out what erik is trying to do. so it either means erik makes charles play this 'guess where it's hiding' game all the time (????) which doesn't really sound likely for him to do, but erik is always begging charles to get into his head so it wouldn't surprise me if he actually did this every time. god knows he's desperate enough or
erik was expecting charles to reject his offer right away, and had multiple other plans shoved up his ass if this was the case. this also seems likely, he's obsessive enough to have thought multiple ways through.
anyways, he puts his two fists up and pulls up the most mortal sentence in existence. one he knows charles won't be able to deny him
"just ONE game 🥺 for old time's sake???? 🥺🥺🥺" man stfu you are 62 years old GET UPPPP
anyways - pay attention to his wording.
"just one game" because erik came ALLLL this way for charles, so charles might as well play ONE game with him, and then erik could be gone - if charles wanted it that way.
"for old's time sake" when things were easier and when they were more at peace - when they were on each other's side. when they were together and the mansion, just after charles had saved him and gave him a hom- oh wait
(also, there's 100% a hidden meaning here. and there’s also a 100% chance i’m reaching but idc. the pawn could be in his left hand or his right. the possibility is 50/50. the only way charles could know with 100% certainty was if he entered erik's mind - if he took up erik's offer. but he could also not get into erik's mind and just... guess and fail - by thus, not taking erik's offer. erik is giving him an out, a choice to make the first move)
(and the chess piece he offers charles a WHITE pawn. the white pieces are the first ones to move.
also also if you have paid attention to the previous movies, erik is always the one to use the white pieces, this is the first movie where we see charles play with white)
anyways, charles does struggle a bit with the choice, but ultimately he decides to accept erik's proposal and """guesses""" right.
and going from erik's... entire face and smirk lmao i'm guessing charles went into his head to get it right. mind you, this is like sex for them
charles accepts - erik is very relieved to know he's not the only one who's down horrendously. and after the worst guessing game in history (seriously, the pawn was in erik's right pocket and then he had it hidden in his right hand... man i guessed that shit and i'm not even a telepath) they start rearranging the board
so anyway, erik gives charles this look like he wants to climb him like a tree, which means that playing edward 'down embarrassingly bad' rochester in jane eyre (2011) finally fucking paid off
erik doesn't even blink mind you, and charles doesn't take his eyes off erik either way, which means they are just STARING at each other without blinking for god knows how long LMAOOO 😭😭😭
once everything is said and done, erik makes a silly little joke and charles rebuts. then erik gives him the biggest smile i've ever seen him give to someone since magda, and then he follows it up with a smaller, softer smile with no teeth
seeing this for the first time in the theater was like getting shot in the chest, no joke
mind you erik stopped trying like three minutes ago but for some reason, the first time we finally see charles soften up in the ENTIRE movie is after he sees erik smiling at him. which could mean nothing.
and the thing is: charles does have a big heart, and he means well, most of the time, but he also doesn’t necessarily has… the best way of showing it with his actions lol. erik knows this, and he knows charles has a thing for lost causes, for people the society has given up on. charles threw himself into the freezing water to save erik - even when he didn't KNOW him.
AND he also knows charles has the biggest soft spot for him, he KNOWS - because all those years ago, charles' biggest accussation wasn't "you paralyzed me" it was "you left me". because after erik lost his wife and daughter, charles rushed to find him, to make sure he was okay. because nine years ago, charles looked at apocalypse and said "fuck you you are twisting erik's grief, and you are hurting him" to A GOD BTW. TO HIS FUCKING FACE NO FUCKS GIVEN AT ALL
tldr: call erik the fucking violinist because boy he sure knows how to play charles like a fucking instrument and how to press all the right keys to get him to say yes to him. he gave charles an out if he didn't want to come with him, but he also came PREPARED for it, mind you, he came PREPARED to take charles with him to genosha. he didn't get to take charles with him 30 years ago, and he was going to be dammed if he didn't take charles with him NOW (this time with no bullet wound and no helmet lol)
and the most insane thing to me is, that he knows charles has a soft spot for him, he's known this for 30 years, and yet, the only time he uses it in his favor is to get charles to say yes to him on this. the only time he uses it is when he thinks he can do something to help charles - to give him back all the kindness charles gave to him 30 years ago.
anways i'm insane. i'll be back here eating glass if you need me. i'm so normal about them. simon kinberg broke something in me 5 years ago
#i'm so sorry about the bible and the terrible english only one of those is my fault#cherik#xmen#erik lehnsherr#charles xavier#long post#otp: i want you by my side#meta#yapping*
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hunger / damon salvatore x reader
i'm back !!! I needed to write a damon one-shot while I work on a new fic and this just tumbled right out of me lol
hunger / damon salvatore x reader
word count: 3.1k
warnings: everything??? drinking, swearing, blood sharing, oral (m and f receiving), unprotected p-in-v, a tiny bit of degradation?? this is self indulgant filth, seriously 18+ mdni
You ran a hand through your hair as you walked back and forth, unsure of what else to do with the restless energy surging through your system as you tried to fight one of your most basic, primal urges… hunger. Your fingers drummed against your thigh as you tried to focus on anything else, find something in your brain worth occupying your mind and switching course from the visuals running through your head. Your recent transition had been a shock to everyone, and Stefan had you on a tight leash to keep you in check… and you’d been on board, at first. You never wanted to cause harm, to be the reason someone else’s life ended, but with the itch in your veins threatening to undo you completely you couldn’t really find it in you to care anymore.
You heard your door push open and your head snapped up to see Damon walking in, two glasses and a bottle in his hand with an unamused expression, “if you don’t knock it off I’m going to have to replace the floor,” he said, setting everything on the dresser before pouring two generous cups of bourbon.
“Not now, Damon,” you sighed, ignoring him entirely as your feet remained on course.
“Wanna talk about it?” he asked and you shook your head.
“Not really,” you said as he shoved a glass in your hand, his eyes telling you to drink which you did… all in one gulp and he was a little surprised as he took it to refill.
“Well, something’s gotta give,” he replied as you finished the second as quickly as the first. “At this rate the bottle will be gone in a minute and I’m not replacing original flooring.” He gripped your shoulders, halting your movements and you huffed, looking up at him.
“I’m hungry, Damon,” you said, as if it pained you to do so and he furrowed his brow.
“The freezer is full- oh,” he cut himself off, realizing that’s not what you meant as a smirk spread across his features. “You want your blood at 98.6,” he said and you rolled your eyes, pushing him off you.
“Will you cut it out?” You poured another glass, hoping at some point the alcohol would subdue your cravings but you knew that was about as likely as him leaving you alone, so you tried another angle. “I can’t… Damon, the blood bags aren’t doing it for me, I can’t think, I can’t sleep… will you please take me out?” For a moment you thought he’d say yes, revel in the opportunity to feed with abandon with someone else, but it wasn’t that easy.
“No can do, sweetheart,” he replied and your brows pinched. “I’ve got enough on my plate without you losing control and giving me more bodies to deal with.” He was right, there was too much going on and you spinning out wasn’t an option, but that didn’t make it any easier of an answer to tolerate. He gave you a once over, it wasn’t as if he didn’t want to take you out… he would have loved to, but you were new and he knew you could eventually get to where he was, one day you’d be able to feed and leave them alive with no memory of what had happened, but that day wasn’t today, you had a long way to go and he couldn’t afford to have you slip up.
But… he couldn’t afford to have you slip up. One look told him you were wound tight, the diet Stefan had you on was restrictive, never enough to fully satisfy, and the less you drank the tighter you spun, threatening a catastrophic snap he could only assume was looming on the horizon with how frustrated you looked right now. He ran through his options, knowing letting you sit in this hunger any longer would result in a much bigger problem, but the only thing he could think of posed another set of issues and would lead to him teetering on the edge instead of you.
He let out a sigh, closing the distance between you and plucking the glass from your hands to discard on the dresser and you looked up at him questioningly, the invasion of space catching you by surprise. His normally bright eyes were dark and swimming with something you couldn’t understand, deep blue pools you found yourself getting lost in as you waited for him to say something. “You need to feed,” he said and your eyes fluttered shut just at the thought.
“I need to feed,” you whispered and he nodded, catching your chin between his fingers and forcing your head back up when you tried to look down and the action had your breath catching somewhere in your throat.
“You still haven’t felt it, have you?” he asked, voice low and you shuddered. “What it’s like to sink your teeth into something…” you shook your head, Stefan hadn’t allowed you to drink anything that didn’t come from a cup. “Poor thing,” he chuckled, he could feel the tension radiating off you in waves, you were practically shaking beneath him as you fought to retain your grip on your sanity, on your control.
“Damon,” you sighed, eyes pleading and he just smiled as he gripped your hand and brought it up to his neck, the pulse beneath your fingers driving you wild.
“When you feed you have to be careful… if you bite just along here,” he said, dragging your fingers along the vein, “you can control the flow. It doesn’t have to be messy,” he explained and you couldn’t tear your eyes away from the subtle way his skin moved with each beat of his heart, the sight bringing the veins beneath your eyes to the surface, your fangs descending.
“Don’t fight it,” he said, noticing you trying to rein it in, and you were having a hard time focusing on anything with the way his hands were trailing up your arms, pulling you closer. “Go on,” he tilted his head just slightly, “give it a try.” he encouraged and this pulled your focus, eyes snapping to his as you tried to ascertain if he was being serious. You had a lot left to learn, but blood sharing was personal, and you knew that… but all you saw in those dark blue eyes was a fire simmering beneath the surface you were sure was a mirror image of your own.
You slowly reached onto your tiptoes, as if he were a deer in the woods threatening to startle and bolt, but the closer you got the harder it was to resist, anticipation burning through your veins at the prospect of giving in. Your fangs were tentative as they broke the skin just where he’d indicated, but the first drop of blood immediately made you feel dizzy and intoxicated… It wasn't enough. You quickly grew feverish, your hand wrapping around his throat as you surged forward, crashing into the wall behind you and he let out a grunt as his back collided with the hard surface, pinned in place as you fed.
“There you go… that’s it,” he said, leaning back as he relaxed and let you take what you needed. His arm snaked around your waist while a hand brushed the hair from your face, cradling the back of your head as warm blood radiated through your body. A soft groan fell from his lips as you drank from him, and the sound elicited an unexpected reaction from you, your hand tightening around his throat and your body pushing flush against his and despite everything in you telling you to continue, you forced yourself back knowing if you didn’t stop you’d bleed him dry.
Your eyes were wild and satisfied as they met his, and he dragged his thumb across your bottom lip, collecting the remnants and you were almost surprised when your lips wrapped around him, ensuring you didn’t waste a single drop. His smirk returned when he felt your tongue slide across his skin, “better?” he asked and you nodded, keeping him in your mouth for maybe a second longer than you needed to. The air was charged between you, you’d just crossed a line in the sand and you wanted to push a little further, go a little farther…
Part of him knew he should put an end to this… stop before it went any further. He knew it before he’d even offered up a vein for you, he knew as soon as he did he’d be teetering on this ledge and he didn’t have that much self control when it came to you. Perhaps, if he really analyzed the situation, he knew somewhere in the back of his mind why you’d been so worked up, he knew what you needed and instead of letting you wreak havoc on the blood cooler he let you push him against a wall and take what you wanted, he let you feed from him in the most intimate way he could think of.
And when you were looking up at him like that, eyes mischievous and holding an unspoken challenge with his blood still on your plump lips, who was he to resist? Your chest was heaving with anticipation as you waited for him to do something, anything, and the movement was so fast you almost didn’t register his hand curling around your throat, flipping you around and slamming you against the wall with such force you were sure you’d be dead if you were human. Your gasp of surprise was swallowed by his mouth on yours, searing and frenzied as he connected your lips and kissed you with a hunger that rivaled your own only moments ago.
You both fought for dominance, neither one of you willing to submit just yet but you were outmatched… he grabbed your wandering hands and pinned them above your head, grip so tight you whined as he kissed down your neck, biting into you the same way you’d done with him and you couldn’t help the moan that fell from your lips as he did. Your hips rolled forward and feeling his hardening length against you gave you the surge of confidence you needed to break your hands free, sliding down his chest to pull his shirt apart, buttons flying and clattering against the floor as you pushed the fabric over his shoulders.
His lips were greedy across the expanse of your chest as he nipped and sucked the soft skin, tearing your shirt to shreds as he pulled it from you, a mess of fabric in your wake as you surged forward and pushed him into the wall opposite you, regaining your upper hand. Glass shattered on the floor around you as the force rattled the dresser but you couldn’t find it in you to care what had broken as your hands pulled his belt free, fingers quickly undoing the button as you sank to the floor and pulled his jeans with you.
His length stood erect in front of you and you were quick to take him in your mouth, focusing your tongue on his swollen tip as your hand worked what didn’t fit, and you couldn’t help but moan around him at the groan that fell from his lips, “such a good girl,” he cooed, his sweet words undercut by the harsh hand in your hair gripping and pulling you closer, forcing you to gag around him and the sensation had his head falling back against the wall. Tears sprung to your eyes at the sharp pain in your scalp and the way he was hitting the back of your throat, but all you could focus on was the throbbing between your thighs and he didn’t miss the way you clenched them together, desperate for friction.
You were quickly on your back, too caught up in the moment to bother moving to the bed and you pushed glass aside as he settled between your legs, tearing your underwear off and diving in like a man starved and you could feel his smirk against you at your surprised moan, head hitting the floor as your back arched in pleasure. He switched between your clit and your entrance, not giving either attention long enough to give you what you really needed, and you whined as your fingers threaded through his hair, tugging harshly.
“Damon, please,” you sighed, hips bucking against his face and he focused his attention on your sensitive bundle of nerves, tongue expertly working you up as you shamelessly moaned his name. Somewhere in the back of your mind you knew with the way you kept slamming each other against walls and the floor, the breaking glass, and the sounds falling from both your lips someone might come to make sure you were alright, but you couldn’t find it in you to care… not when he felt as good as he did between your legs.
Your moan changed in pitch when he slid two fingers into your entrance and it went straight to his cock, his head swimming as he watched you come close to falling apart above him. When he crooked his fingers just so your grip in his hair tightened, pulling him closer as you started to grind against him, “fuck, just like-” you were cut off by your own moan when he started massaging that spot inside you, legs trembling as you careened off the ledge. His touches remained merciless as pure euphoria surged through your veins, your head cloudy as your body trembled.
“So fucking beautiful,” he muttered against you, kissing his way up your body and you tugged him closer to reconnect your lips, tongues swirling against each other as you tasted yourself on him. His hands felt greedy and possessive as they roamed over you, gripping tight enough to leave bruises that would heal before they even had a chance to form, and it was as if neither of you could get enough. You pushed forward, tugging him up with you and all but throwing him onto the bed and his smirk was devilish as he watched you crawl on top of him.
He looked like he was about to say something but you didn’t give him the opportunity as you kissed him, rough and demanding as your hips settled above his, hand reaching between you to line him up at your entrance and you both let out groans as you took him inch by inch. The stretch was sweet, filling you almost to your breaking point as you settled fully and started to roll your hips against him, shuddering at the feeling.
“Fuck,” he moaned as you started to bounce up and down, setting an unforgiving pace and you felt like you could feel him everywhere, every nerve ending radiating with fire. He sat up to wrap his arms around you, hips bucking to meet yours in a way that had your head rolling back and he took the opportunity to sink his teeth into your neck and you had never felt pleasure like this before. His hand was firm around your throat as your body shook with each thrust and soon you were boneless in his lap, only able to hold yourself upright as he drank you in.
When he pulled back you licked along his lips, face changing at the taste of blood and he swore he’d never seen anything sexier. Neither of you was going to last much longer, not like this, and he delivered a rough smack to your ass that had you whining and rolling against him. “Oh my god,” you breathed out, letting your forehead fall against his and he smacked again, gripping the tender skin, “Damon-” you tried, but nothing would come out.
“What’s that, sweetheart?” he teased, gripping your hair and pulling you back to look at him, “oh, look at you… all cock drunk and fucked out,” he teased and you had nothing to say as a firm thrust had you seeing stars. You buried your face in his neck, fangs sinking into his skin as you felt your release barreling towards you, the mixture of blood and his steady thrusts too much to bear and a streak of red trailed down your body as you came, only able to shout his name as you cried out.
Your grip on him was maddening, pulling him right over the edge with you as you milked him for everything he had, and when you both slowed to a stop you were having a hard time catching your breath, your mind floating somewhere above you as you tried to return to your body. You felt his tongue along your chest, cleaning up your mess as you leaned back and he tried to commit the sight to memory… your hair wild, cheeks flushed, and skin dewy as blood lingered along your skin.
You still weren’t fully with him, stuck in a haze as you felt him whisk you into his bedroom, and into the bathroom and it wasn’t until you were under the stream of water with him that you hummed contently against his lips as he kissed you softly, “there she is,” he chuckled.
His hands were delicate as they roamed you, and yours slid down the front of his chest as you looked up at him, doe eyed and happy. “That was…” you trailed off, unsure of what word to use to fully sum it up and he placed another soft kiss on your lips.
“Everything you ever dreamed of?” he provided and you laughed as you swatted his chest.
“Hush,” you replied, feigning annoyance but you didn’t have it in you to feel anything other than bliss. The rest of your shower was spent with wandering hands and sweet kisses, a stark contrast to how rough and domineering you’d been with each other and when he pulled you into bed and wrapped himself around you, you looked up at him as your fingers trailed along his chest absentmindedly.
“What are you thinking about?” he asked, and you flushed slightly under his gaze.
“It was more than I dreamed of,” you answered, and he raised a brow in question. “I haven’t… I hadn’t done that since turning, I didn’t know it could be like that,” you explained and realization passed over his features.
“My god,” he chuckled, “no wonder you were wound so tight.” His hand on your back was comfortable, holding you tight against him as he rubbed soothingly, “we’ll go on a little trip this weekend,” he said as you rested your head on his chest.
“A trip?”
You felt him nod, “away from all the chaos here… we’ll find you some warm bodies and I’ll teach you how to do it the right way, you don’t have to live a life of blood bags forever.”
“I don’t know, you seemed to do the trick,” you teased and he laughed.
“Sweetheart, you have no idea what you’re missing.”
#damon salvatore#damon salvatore x reader#damon salvatore x you#damon salvatore fan fiction#damon salvatore fanfiction#damon salvatore smut#damon salvatore fluff#the vampire diaries#the vampire diaries fan fiction#tvdu
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for what it's worth I personally don't believe spite had anything to do with the pantry near-kiss experience at all. I think that was a 100% lucanis naturel disaster no supernatural additives present or indeed required. at most spite was watching that whole situation go down with mild puzzlement about approximately every part of it, I don't think he'd have much interest in it one way or the other. the explanation seems much more mundane and grounded and in some ways much sadder to me.
if your nervous system has never been in a place where any surge of emotion, even -- in fact sometimes especially! -- a good and exciting one makes you feel like your soul just touched a hot stove it can't get away from, then sincerely, from the bottom of my heart and without a trace of snark, thank goodness and I hope you never experience it. For the rest of you... fistbump of solidarity it's rough out here but *grits teeth* we stay silly etc. In the place lucanis is in during that part of the game, feeling like you're losing control (again even for ostensibly good happy reasons) can feel an awful lot like you're dying, or worse. on top of everything else going on for him -- again going only with non-supernatural elements and not even comprehensive: a year of non-stop horrific trauma added to pile of previous mountain of childhood and attachment trauma. chronic sleep deprivation. apparently dead grandma doubling as mother figure. cousin-brother aggressively fucking around and in real danger of finding out. fucked up the ONE thing he thought he knew how to do that's been the central pillar of his identity. the world might be ending even more than it already was because of it. keeps faceplanting with barely any dignity and having to get up again with alarming regularity GOD how could I ever not save treviso this man desperately needs a W (just one!!) like few people in the history of the world have before him. he's more caffeine than man because the alternative feels worse. it's bad in here. and ON TOP of all that he's in the process of falling just. appallingly soul-shrivingly in love, which can notably be playing on hard mode even when you're in a mostly functional place, that shit routinely rocks people to the core under the best of circumstances.
so I'm not surprised it's too overwhelming for him to handle when he tries to throw himself in head first -- in fact I'd have been more surprised if it weren't lol. he clearly wants it so much, which only makes it so much more painful that he can't actually bear to touch it when it's offered to him freely and eagerly. this is the tantalus-level awfulness of this kind of attachment trauma; food seems to be right there, you can see it, almost smell it sometimes, but no matter what you just can't seem to reach it. seemingly not for any flaw in the existence of the food, but because of something broken in you that can't or can't bear to actually eat. his deliberate flirting routine is kind of deeply dorky tbh lol (in the most endearing way possible let's be perfectly clear) and I don't think it's entirely natural to him -- that's a hastily cobbled together 'oh god I am getting the vibes here it is happening for some reason they like me for my personality quick what would illario do' approach if ever I saw it, supported by the fact that it never really makes a return after this --
BUT I do think his obvious near-unbearable delight with rook's existence and person that shines through in that scene is entirely real and unfeigned. he likes them so much. he wants so bad to be able to be close to them. he's so hungry for the reprieve and release and relief they represent to him, just for one moment, just one break from all the awfulness to have something uncomplicatedly good. and it's here, it's been offered, he's welcome!!! and he has to flinch away at the last minute anyway because he's an exposed nerve of a human being. there's a point at which every sensation including joy becomes indistinguishable from agony. he's pretty much exactly at that point. for the love of god have some mercy on him people. the feeling that salvation is right here but you're too broken a vessel to hold it is one I wouldn't wish on anyone. let him have a few moments to stare into the void before he's ready to get back up and try again surely we all deserve at least that much lol
#dragon age#dragon age: the veilguard#dragon age: the veilguard spoilers#dragon age spoilers#lucanis dellamorte#rook x lucanis#rookanis#this is literally just me ranting about the feelings he evokes in me and not really directed at anyone I just. I Feel. things#in case you can't tell. I'm the lucanis. him is me. we be like this. this all makes the too much kind of perfect sense to me#it's odd in narrative structure but it's uh. uncomfortably real in some ways. freeze is difficult to describe in conventional narrative#it's a bad time to have in a bad place. but very decent company to be in I must say I love him. so much#also I think we might have exposed some of the basic garrusness going on here haha (just one thing please just one good thing)#and how much getting there hinges on feeling completely safe in that relationship. anyway. everyone ok. I'm not but someone should be
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LIKE FATHER
PAIRING ➩ jay x reader
SUMMARY ➩ moving in with your short term boyfriend turns out to have its own set of challenges, including how attractive his father is
WARNINGS ➩ there is obviously an age gap although reader is in her early 20s, cheating on both ends, …. reader and jay are both pretty terrible people sorry jungwon
WC ➩ 10.6k
AUTHORS NOTE ➩ For some reason this was not fun to write lol but hope that doesn’t come across in it and you can enjoy! NOT PROOFREAD
“You’re sure your dad won’t mind me coming to stay with you guys?” You took a step too far away from where the phone was attached to the wall and you cringed at the sharp tug on the chord.
Your room fell silent for a few seconds and you waited to see if it caused any damage to the connection or alerted anybody downstairs to the fact you’d been sitting on the same call for almost two hours while you packed up your most important belongings.
“The offer has been on the table for months Y/N, you know that.” Jungwon’s voice was as sweet as ever crackling through the static of your old phone but you still sighed despite his reassurance.
He wasn’t lying, him and (according to what he’d been saying) his father had been inviting you to come and stay with them ever since you and Jungwon transitioned from friends to something more and you finally opened up to him about your rocky home life.
You certainly weren’t one for charity especially when it involved moving in with your boyfriend of only two months but you trusted him enough to know he wouldn’t make something more out of this than it was.
That didn’t stop the sick feeling in your stomach from growing as you continued to stuff the most necessary items into another backpack, your free ear listening as closely as ever for the sound of angry footsteps stomping their way to your bedroom.
“And your mom is okay with it?” Your voice had gotten softer the more you asked, feeling ridiculous from how much you’d repeated yourself the last few days.
“Sweetheart you know she’s never home. It would be nice to have you around trust me, we could use a softer touch around the house.” He was shuffling something around on the other side of the line and you felt both affection and more guilt knowing he was likely preparing the guest room for your arrival.
You’d been stern when you told Jungwon you weren’t going to share his room with him but your boyfriend didn’t even think twice about it, as overly nice and bubbly as he always was.
That’s what had initially attracted you to the younger boy considering you had been known for your sharper demeanor for a long time, although not necessarily your fault when you looked back at your upbringing. He brought out a childish side of you that you had learned to appreciate and his sensitivity was only occasionally overwhelming.
It wasn’t at all surprising that he was grinning brightly at you on the day you finally arrived to his house, directly opposite of your own grim expression and the way you nervously pulled your large backpack higher on your shoulders.
He was quickly moving towards you so he could take one of the stuffed bags out of your hands and you thanked him softly before looking back towards the doorway, faltering now that he had moved and a new figure had taken his place.
You’d never met Jungwon’s parents before considering how fresh your relationship was and how rare it was for you to be able to leave home and see him outside of mandatory things like studying.
You knew not everybody had parents like yours but, for some reason, you hadn’t considered what type of people would raise a boy like Jungwon. The few times an image did pop up into your head it had been small round faces with bright eyes and smiles as wide as his were, friendly grandparent like energy that would greet you with warm hugs and maybe some freshly baked cookies.
Nothing like the man that was standing in front of you right now.
For a moment he bared absolutely zero resemblance to your boyfriend and you wouldn’t have even guessed they were related if it wasn’t for the way he cocked his eyebrow at you (a habit Jungwon also had whenever he was confused about something).
His eyes were sharp behind his thin wired glasses and almost cold if it wasn’t for the smile finally gracing his face, still not doing much to combat his impactful image. He was also decades younger than what you had pictured and you suddenly remembered comments Jungwon had made about his dad being mistaken for his older cousin.
“Dad this is Y/N.” The feeling of your boyfriends shoulder pressing against yours was slightly shaking you out of your dazed staring and you reddened, glancing at him from the side of your eye before hesitantly facing the owner of the house again. “My girlfriend.”
He’d taken a few steps off the porch now to stand infront of you and you hoped your face didn’t reflect how startled you felt, already feeling the embarrassment that would hit you later about how bad this first meeting was going.
“Nice to meet you Y/N, I’ve heard a lot about you.” His voice was a lot softer than you expected it to be, light and airy like he was trying to keep the attention off of himself.
It took you a few long humiliating seconds to realize his hand was outstretched towards you and you fumbled around awkwardly with your bags before grabbing it in yours, his palm slightly cold and calloused. You took a moment to wonder what he did for work before you were squeezing his hand in a small shake.
“It’s nice to meet you sir.” You hated how weak you sounded and you distantly heard Jungwon laugh a bit at your obvious nerves, making a mental note to scold him for it once you were alone.
“Jongseong is fine.” He was smiling now and your eyes shot to the sharp canine teeth peeking past his full lips before going back to hold his gaze, seeing a hint of something you couldn’t make out before it was disappearing with a blink.
You were testing his name out in a whisper instinctively before letting go of his lingering touch, going back to clenching the strap of your backpack and letting Jungwon lead you inside.
-
The first day went a lot smoother after your initial awkward interaction with Jongseong, being able to take the time alone in the guest room to unpack your few items and really take in the fact that you had left home.
Jungwon had respected the fact that you needed some space to adjust and he hadn’t bothered you much after giving you a short tour, popping into the doorway every few hours to give you an encouraging smile and ask if you needed his help with anything.
You once again appreciated how sweet your boyfriend was and found yourself feeling incredibly lucky to have landed somebody like him, giving him a quick kiss goodnight before you were changing into your pajama set and letting him go to sleep. You still had a few more things to set up and you figured you wouldn’t be sleeping for a while anyways, your nerves still high enough to keep you on edge.
It was definitely past midnight when you saw the shadow in your new doorway, a smile sneaking into your face before you even turned around.
“Sneaking into my room on the first night?” You didn’t bother looking at him, already anticipating the feeling of him hugging you from behind and bashfully denying your innuendo.
“Not quite.”
Your body tensed up in half a second at the sound of the far less familiar voice coming from behind you, freezing in place with a pile of clothes still in your hands.
Fear was obvious on your face when you dropped the few items clumsily on the bed and spun around to face him, Jongseong standing in the place where you had expected your boyfriend to be. The light amusement in his gaze wasn’t enough to stop the wave of embarrassment hitting you again and you flushed at the sight of him in more casual clothing, leaning against your doorway.
“I’m so sorry, I thought you were.. I didn’t even mean…” You were bouncing back and fourth between explaining why you had said it and not wanting him to think you actually had plans to let Jungwon sneak into your room.
His low chuckle stopped your rambling and you watched him sheepishly, once again struck by how young he looked especially now that he was just wearing a black sweater and some sweatpants with a college logo you couldn’t quite make out.
“Don’t worry about it, I know my son is a good kid and you seem like a sweet girl.” He was speaking so casually and you tried to ignore the low heat building at the light compliment coming from him. You chalked it up to wanting the approval of your boyfriend’s parent, nodding softly and shifting in place. “Was just coming to see how you were settling in?”
“It’s great sir. I’m just finishing up here.” You gestured behind you to the messy bed of your belongings and he titled his head just enough to look around you.
His gaze trailed back to you and you paused again at the heaviness of it, almost worried he was upset with you for making yourself at home so quickly.
“Y/N, I said Jongseong is fine.” He was repeating the same thing he told you earlier in the day but his tone was a lot sharper now, not quite irritated but definitely enough for you to get the memo.
Your eyes widened a touch at the sudden sternness but you were quick to nod at him and resist the urge to apologize to him, not wanting to turn something so small into a big ordeal like you had earlier with the handshake.
“I really appreciate you letting me stay with you guys.” You attempted to force yourself to keep your tone light and casual in an effort to stop making every interaction with him end in embarrassment. “…Jongseong.”
His eyes flashed with that same look you had noticed earlier and for a second you wondered if he regretted letting you address him so informally so soon now that it was actually rolling off your tongue. He barely shifted against the doorway but it was enough movement for you to drag your gaze down his outfit again before meeting his eyes quickly.
He raised his eyebrow again and the image reminded you of your boyfriend who was asleep just down the hall, chest tightening for some weird reason you didn’t really understand.
“No more thanking me and if you need anything, please let me know. And I do mean anything.” His voice never wavered when he spoke, an aura of maturity and self assurance carrying his words out smoothly, but his tone lowered at the end and now it was your turn to raise your eyebrows. “Sleep well Y/N.”
By the time you were prying open your lips to whisper something close to wishing him goodnight, he was already turning away from the doorway and walking down the dark hallway.
You waited a few seconds with bated breath before flopping back onto the bed while crushing all of your belongings sprawled across it in the process.
——
Waking up the next morning had you finally feeling the emotions of actually being away from your house, nearly getting a good nights sleep without the worry of being woken up by your angry father or belligerent mom.
You had a few instances where you woke up randomly and sprung into a sitting position, startled in your sleep by your bodies natural instinct to react and panic. Once you processed the quiet and safe room that surrounded you, you were able to fall back asleep slowly.
Jungwon and his dad had let you sleep in but you definitely didn’t want to make a habit of it, promising yourself you’d get up each day and make yourself useful as a thank you for their hospitality.
“There she is.” Your boyfriend’s cheerful voice was the first one to greet you when you got dressed and made your way downstairs, smiling sheepishly at him where he stood leaned against the kitchen counter.
You were walking straight into his arms and he gave you a soft hug, swaying lightly side to side as he made affectionate noises at your tired demeanor.
“How’d you sleep?” Another voice snapped you out of your daze a bit and you pulled away to find Jongseong, watching you over the rim of his coffee mug he was currently taking a large drink from.
“Good, very good.” You lied as naturally as you could and Jungwon kissed his teeth happily at your answer whilst his dad continued to watch you skeptically. “Anything I can help with?”
You had just now noticed that they seemed to be in the middle of preparing something for lunch, different ingredients littering the counters and three plates stacked nicely on top of each other. You wondered briefly if they always ate together like this despite it just being the two of them most the time or if it was a special occasion to welcome you.
“I would normally say no but I totally hate cutting up the vegetables.” Jungwon was always so bubbly that you couldn’t help but smile at him as he passed the task over to you, affection in your chest as you patted his arm softly and nodded.
He was quick to leave the kitchen before his dad could give him another assignment but you could still hear him humming in the dining room alongside the sound of plates being placed on the table and silverware clanking against glass.
You’d barely picked up the knife before you heard a low scoff and you glanced at Jongseong from the side of your eye, raising an eyebrow in question when you found him watching you.
His stare was disapproving but you didn’t see any seriousness in it, shaking his head when you slowly pressed the blade down against a head of broccoli. A laugh escaped you at his attempts to teach you without any speaking and you placed the knife back down on the counter.
“Care to show me your technique?” You surprised yourself with the teasing tone you’d taken on but you decided it was less awkward to pretend it was intentional, leaning back against the corner of the counters and waiting for his rebuttal.
“It would save us a lot of trouble.” He was swift to put down the seasoning bottles he had been applying to pieces of meat on a cutting board and you eyed him curiously as he approached.
You had fully expected him to take the knife and showcase what you were supposed to be doing with it but instead he was pausing by your tray of vegetables and beckoning you to approach it.
You were slow now when you moved back to where you had been standing considering he was right next to you this time, that same gaze that never seemed to leave you burning holes in the side of your face now. He cleared his throat before he was moving behind you, still close enough to be able to wrap his arms around you and grasp your wrist in his hand.
Your breath caught in your throat immediately both at the feeling of his skin touching yours and the fact he was nearly pressed up against you.
“Hold it tightly, just like that.” His voice came out in almost a whisper and you wondered if it naturally lowered the quieter he got or if he was doing it intentionally. You were on autopilot when you adjusted your fingers under his but apparently it had been correct considering the pleased hum you heard directly in your ear. “There we go Y/N, good job.”
The light praise was making you feel nearly sick and you braved looking over your shoulder in an attempt to see him.
“Jongseong.” Your face flushed red when you heard how breathy your voice was especially since he was standing far too close for you to be able to see his expression and understand what this situation was meant to be. “Sir.”
You hated how defenseless you were now but you’d be an idiot to deny how attractive he was and something about him being much older than you was leaving you feeling weaker than normal, weak enough that you didn’t feel the need to stop him when you felt his hand that wasn’t holding yours over the knife land above your hip.
“What did I say about that?” His mouth had moved closer to your ear and your eyes fluttered shut at the feeling of him squeezing your side, automatically swaying backwards to lean more against him. “Can you keep quiet for me?”
You were enthusiastically nodding your head without a second thought and your mouth parted when he slid his hand over your side to your stomach, pushing your thin shirt up carelessly so he could feel your skin.
The knife had been abandoned by both of you, his other hand also moving down to your exposed midsection and yours gripping the counter intensely, knuckles turning white from the pressure you were applying.
You could feel him press against you harder and you let out a shaky breath at his entire body over yours, height caging you in with his arms still around you.
“Doing so good.” He was speaking again and his voice alone was enough to spur a whine to fall from your lips, one of his hands quickly leaving your stomach in favor of extending over your throat and gripping your chin tightly between his fingers in an attempt to keep you from making another sound.
You were finally moving on your own to grab his wrist and impatiently maneuver his fingers so you could wrap your lips around two of them, feeling please with yourself when he made a slightly pained noise at the sudden feeling of your tongue soothing over his skin.
It was a definite way to keep you quiet and you could feel the effect it had on him considering he was pushed against you so tightly, the feeling of him beyond addicting in a way that was leaving your head spinning and taking away any rational thinking you had.
“You like that? Thought you’d take longer but here you are sucking on my fingers without even asking.” He was continuing to talk but you were focused so much on the sound of his voice that you couldn’t even process what he was actually saying.
Your lips were parting to try to say something back but you were interrupted by the sound of something hitting wood loudly right outside the door, immediately feeling Jongseong spring away from you just in time for Jungwon to walk into the kitchen and casually complain that he had bumped into one of the chairs.
Luckily his dad was quick to entertain his pained expression and engage in conversation with him because there was no way you would be able to speak now, face flushing with guilt and a terrible feeling in your stomach at the realization he had been two seconds from walking in on you doing something so awful and betraying him.
Your shoulders were tense as you stared straight ahead of you at the uncut vegetables and the completely abandoned knife. It had all happened so fast that you almost convinced yourself you’d daydreamed it if it wasn’t for the way your shirt was still slightly pushed up and the taste of his skin on your tongue.
You glanced over your shoulder in the direction of your boyfriend and his dad to find the latter already watching you like he commonly seemed to be, eyes dark and amused like he was daring you to say something about what had happened.
It was clear to both of you that you hadn’t even thought about it and you quickly looked away just in time for his lips to curl up into a smirk.
——
The next day was plagued with the realization of what happened and for the first time in your life you were actually wishing you could go home.
You didn’t necessarily regret it and you certainly didn’t fault him for anything that had happened considering you were more than a willing participant but between the guilt you felt everytime you saw Jungwons sweet face and the the constant want for more that wasn’t dying out, you felt exhausted.
Jongseong was an attractive man and you’d be stupid to deny something so obvious, from his sharp jawline and his cat like eyes that seemed to pierce you every time you made contact across a room. It also didn’t hurt that he was taller than you and Jungwon both and clearly in shape, evident by how he felt pushed against you.
Your face was smushed into your pillow as you restlessly rolled around trying to shake your head empty of the thoughts of his hands on your body and his mouth on your skin, proving impossible the more you laid there.
Maybe something was developmentally wrong with you or your issues with your father possibly made it so you were unable to deny the affection of somebody so much older than you. Whatever it was you weren’t too happy about it and the dull wanting ache in your stomach was not going away no matter how much time you spent avoiding him.
Apparently he was feeling the same thing because after a few days of doing your best to stay away, he was coming to find you.
“Can I have a word with you?” His voice from your doorway was making you spring up from the bed and you immediately flushed at the realization your hair was a complete mess from all your dramatic rolling.
He either didn’t notice or didn’t mind because his eyes stayed locked on yours and you nodded your head automatically at his question, watching him with wide eyes as he entered the small room and shut the door behind him.
A low heat was already building at the fact the two of you were alone and you only briefly wondered where your boyfriend was before hearing his voice come from down the hallway, shouting at whatever game he was always playing with his friends online.
Jungwon had been very good at giving you your space as you adjusted and you were beyond appreciative of that especially since you were constantly paranoid he would realize something was wrong.
“I would like to apologize.” He started off smooth and calm and you watched him silently as he shifted in place and kept his hands in his pockets. “I need to apologize.”
You felt a little bad that you weren’t really focusing on how emotionally torn up he looked but it really was his fault for coming into your bedroom wearing suit pants and a button up shirt, his work tie long abandoned and giving him an even sexier casual look. Your eyes were scanning his figure and you could only hope you weren’t drooling as he attempted to have a serious conversation with you.
He sighed a little bit at your obvious distraction and you finally paid attention when he sat on the edge of your bed, dipping slightly under his weight.
“I’m sorry?” You had meant it to be a chance for him to repeat his statements but instead he just scoffed out a laugh.
“Pretty sure that’s my line.” He was finally relaxing slightly but you could tell he still had his guard up, more so when you sat up on your knees and leaned closer to where he was stiffly sitting. “I made a mistake.”
You were earnest in the way you shook your head and his face was turned towards you just enough to see the way your expression crumpled at his regret even though you’d been struggling with the same dilemma. You hadn’t quite come to the conclusion that you wish it hadn’t happened so you were struck by the fact he had especially since he had been the one to initiate it.
“You didn’t.” You didn’t even bother caring about the possibility that you looked pathetic, crawling across the bed so you could be beside him with your hands coming up to grip his arm in an attempt to keep his attention on you. “We didn’t do anything I didn’t want, I promise.”
For a second you wondered if this was the outcome he had hoped for when he came into the room, if he had only apologized to be able to say he did all that he could to avoid the situation worsening.
You also wondered if he would be offended by you thinking so poorly of him or if your opinion didn’t matter at all, maybe he even liked the idea of you thinking he was a bad person for wanting you but still wanting him tenfold anyways.
It was hard to understand what was going through his mind considering the only things you really knew about him was that he was Jungwons father and this was extremely wrong of you both, especially the way he was looking at you now that you were closer to each other.
“I liked the way you touched me.” Your voice was dropping down to a mere whisper and his eyes automatically darkened at the turn in the conversation, gaze flickering down to where your hand was sliding up towards his shoulder before meeting your eyes again. “Should I leave you alone?”
You both silently understood that the out you were giving him was nothing more than a teasing remark, you knowing he wouldn’t accept it and him knowing you didn’t want him to.
His big hand was coming up to cup your cheek before you could say another word and you sighed happily when he was pulling you forward so he could finally kiss you properly.
The kiss was sloppy and wet right from the beginning and the heat built rapidly in you now, fully feeling the difference between Jungwon and the older man next to you. He was clearly more experience and he had no hesitation in the way he was roughly grabbing your arm and pulling you forward so you were straddling his lap.
You whined against his mouth and you could feel him smiling at the sound, keeping his hand on your face like he was trying to stop you from moving away despite the fact you were sat ontop of him with your hands smoothing over his shoulders and arms.
“Jongseong.” You were breathing his name into the air with his lips on your neck and he hummed half heartedly in question. “Jay quit.”
Your hands were in his hair making a complete mess of it and a large part of you felt smug for getting to be the one to make such a responsible man, an adult in every sense of the word, pull you closer and closer like he was worried you’d stop him too early.
“This is a bad idea.” Your eyes fluttered shut when his teeth scraped your skin and his arm was fully wrapped around your lower back to keep you from leaving.
“This is the best idea I’ve ever had.” He was holding your gaze for just a second once your eyes opened again before he was kissing you, back to the filth and desperation immediately like you’d never stopped.
Your immediate attraction to each other was undeniable but you knew while kissing him that you wouldn’t be able to stop anytime soon, even if it meant hurting Jungwon after he had been so kind to you.
That word was the issue and you felt a flash of annoyance at the thought of him and how nice he constantly was. His hands were always hovering over your skin like he thought his touch would hurt you and he was always wincing whenever you vented after a bad day or said something rude about a stranger, his heart so soft and pure and so easy to break that it drove you to insanity occasionally.
You stayed with Jungwon because he was not the type to leave you, regardless if he loved you or not. You knew you didn’t have to worry about randomly being dumped or cheated on with the younger boy because he was simply too kind to hurt your feelings.
Jay didn’t seem to mind as much as his son about your well-being or how fragile you could possibly be, hands roughly groping your body and biting down on your swollen lips despite the fact you had to leave this room and act like nothing happened.
“Stop thinking.” His voice was rough and set in a whisper that made your back arch so you could press yourself into him. “Focus on me princess.”
“I’m trying.” Your answer was surprisingly honest and he pulled back so your lips weren’t touching anymore although still close enough that you could feel his nose rubbing against yours and feel his breath on your face.
“He’ll never know.” He sounded so sure that for a second you wondered if this was the type of thing he did often.
Not necessarily with his sons girlfriends considering you knew for a fact you were the first girl Jungwon had ever spent time around let alone dated but you realized in that moment that you didn’t know anything about the man underneath you besides the fact he was willing to press himself against you the first day you meant just off pure attraction alone.
The thought paralyzed you for a second and you instinctively looked towards the door, feeling him tense underneath you at the realization you were uncomfortable.
His hand was coming up to hold your cheek softly and you noted how rough his skin felt compared to Jungwons baby smooth palm, that low heat still there at the difference despite how awkward you felt now.
“I’m not like this usually.” You weren’t sure why the confession spilled from your lips but you were partially hoping he’d give you one in return. “I’ve never done this before.”
Instead he was giving you a soft smile and for once he had no dark lust in his eyes or ulterior motive when he leaned in to kiss your lips softly, barely there peck that made your head spin with new emotions towards the situation. He was still looking at you with the heavy fondness when he pulled back again and you knew you must’ve looked like a fool, eyes wide with innocent admiration as you stared at him infatuated.
This time when you made a light move off his lap he didn’t try to stop you and you settled for sitting right next to him, fully facing his direction and waiting for him to say something- anything that would confirm he was the same way.
Your chest clenched uncomfortably when he wasn’t looking at you and you could see a tightness in his jaw that wasn’t there before, wondering if it was anger or something else.
“I’m sorry.” You were whispering it without knowing what you were really apologizing for and his gaze snapped over to you like he had forgotten you were there.
“What for? I came onto you.” He clearly had a habit of being blunt but you wanted to shrink into yourself hearing the words be said so carelessly and loud into the quiet room. “Do you love my son?”
The question completely threw you off and you were left without a reply long enough for it to become one, your conflicted expression and half opened mouth like you were searching for the right words was all he needed to see to know your answer.
You had been friends with Jungwon a long time before he actually asked you out for a date and you assumed the comfortability and the want to not ruin your friendship was what made you say yes that first time and all the times after that.
“He’s good to me.” You quickly interjected when you realized his expression had changed to an almost smug look, the need to defend your boyfriend triumphing the want to please the man you knew could make you feel good if you let him. “Better than I am to him.”
“Does he touch you?” He nearly cut you off to ask it and the image of Jungwon sweetly kissing you and wincing whenever you made a crude joke flashed in your mind as you shook your head in denial. “Good.”
You weren’t sure if it was a sense of ego or casual possession that led him to enjoying your answer but you sighed softly as he leaned in to kiss you again, moving your mouth with his instinctively and wishing now you had never stopped in the first place. The conversation hadn’t given you any clarity and if anything you were just more confused but it was hard to think when he was kissing you.
He was pulling away and standing up before you could really understand why you weren’t kissing anymore and you heard him murmur for you to sleep well before he was exiting the room.
——
You realized the next morning that it had been far too long since you left the house and the largest part of you hoped that getting some fresh air would give you some mental clarity and help you get out of your situation, beginning to think that being in his presence was actually casting some sort of spell on you.
You spent the entire day out searching for different part time jobs around the neighborhood and by the time you started to walk back your legs were burning from how far you’d traveled.
There was a heavy sense of pride and accomplishment within yourself for getting back out there but it was almost immediately vanishing when you opened the front door to the sight of company.
Both Jungwon and Jay were in the kitchen which didn’t really surprise you now that you realized it was almost dinner time, they seemed to enjoy cooking together more than other father son duos you’d met, but the thing that was throwing you off was the third person standing against the counter.
You should have known something was wrong by the look on Jays face when you first walked in, bridled with annoyance that you hadn’t quite seen yet from him.
Your boyfriend looked similarly distressed (something you noticed only after a pang of guilt for checking out his father first hit you) and you quickly understood why when the unknown figure was leisurely crossing the room like she owned the place.
Possibly because she actually did.
“You must be Y/N.” Her voice was silky and smooth in a mature way that only came with age and your eyes widened naturally as her slender hand extended towards you.
“Yes I am, it’s so good to meet you.” You’d practiced weeks ago what to say when you meant Jungwons parents but you had never expected this to be the kind of person who has raised somebody so warm. “Thank you for letting me stay with you guys.”
She seemed to suck all the air out of the room and you felt almost like you were going to be sick the longer you stood there, eyes drifting over her small frame to where you knew Jay would be watching you from his place in the kitchen.
His eyes were stone cold and cautious but you assumed it wasn’t directed at you considering you hadn’t heard a single mention of Jungwons mom your entire stay here, not so much as a photo of her on the fridge or girly shampoo on the shelves in the shower.
Your heart clenched realizing how little you knew about their life even after moving in with them because you couldn’t tell if she was intruding or if you were.
“I take it you’re enjoying your stay?” Her voice sounded sharper than it had before and your eyes trailed from her husband back to her, feeling caught even though you weren’t sure in what.
“It’s been wonderful.” Your own voice had gotten a tension to it that you weren’t used to hearing lately and you could see Jungwon shifting behind her like he was considering stepping in and cutting the interaction short before your famously short temper unraveled at the worst possible time.
Instead it was Jay that moved to come in between you and for half a second you assumed his moving hand was going to land on you, foolishly freezing when it was wrapping around her waist.
She looked almost as surprised as you did so you only slightly understood the flash of anger that ripped through you at the sight of him touching her.
“Should we have a seat and eat together?” He sounded unlike himself and a quick shift of his sharp eyes towards you was enough for you to eagerly nod and make your way towards the table to avoid upsetting him.
You felt ridiculously childish and upset at the way your lips formed into a pout when you saw them sitting side by side even more so when Jungwon was coming to pull his chair out next to you and only snapping you into reality enough to make you fix your expression before anyone noticed.
The dinner was cold and awkward without a single word spoken outside of asking to pass the salt or a clearing of the throat. For some reason you had been mentally preparing yourself for a line of harsh questioning from his mother, maybe even a few snide comments that would insinuate you knew what her husband tasted like but instead she didn’t look up from her plate or even regard the fact you were sitting there.
It upset you for Jungwon who kept glancing around like he was waiting for something resembling a conversation or any show of interest in his life, especially about the person he was dating.
Your chair pushing out was obnoxiously loud and you winced when all three faces turned toward you as you stood up, for a second seeing the resemblance between Jungwon and his mom more than him and Jay.
“Bathroom.” The word squeaked out from you and you were turning and dashing off before anybody could respond, almost tripping over the rug on the way and feeling a flush of embarrassment at how unladylike you probably looked to somebody like her.
The state of you in the mirror made it five times worse and you could’ve cried seeing the red of your cheeks and how unkempt you’d gotten from walking around all day. You had been in such a good mood and so proud of yourself yet managed to feel the opposite in such a short time, throat tightening the longer you stared at yourself.
You tensed up when the door was opening without even being knocked on and you weren’t too surprised to see Jay stepping into the small bathroom, looking at you blankly until he realized how upset you were.
“What happened?” He was quick to step towards you and although you wanted to flinch away from his touch instead you were leaning into him and wrapping your arms around his middle.
“I thought I had such an important day.” Your voice was embarrassingly whiny but luckily it was mostly muffled by the fact your face was tucked against his chest, especially since he was wearing a thick sweater that you thought made him look more domestic than usual. “But coming home and seeing her..”
You trailed off because you weren’t really sure what the issue was although you had a feeling he’d figure it out before you even did.
He was petting your hair softly and you picked your face up to look at him, peering up and wanting for him to say something that would hopefully make you feel less stupid about your dramatics.
“Did you do good today?” He was tucking some loose strands behind your ear and speaking in that firm parental tone that made your body light up immediately. You were nodding your head after a few seconds of hesitance from your own self doubt and he hummed softly. “I’m so proud of you.”
You leaned further into him at the soft praise and you could hear him chuckle just as much as you felt it, chest rising and falling with the sound and pressing into yours with the movement.
It was inevitable that you softly rocking up on your tiptoes was going to lead to another kiss, his hand cupping your cheek as he met you half way and silenced your desperate whine with his lips pressing against yours. You felt a sense of heavy comfort and warmth wash over you now that you were finally getting what you wanted from the moment you stepped inside and your smoothed your hands over his firm back up to his shoulder blades.
He was taking a few steps forward and your back roughly hit the bathroom counter, wasting no time before you were scrambling to sit ontop of it so he could press forward in between your open legs and keep kissing you harder and harder.
His hips fell against yours and your body felt like it was on fire from how much you needed more of that, mouth parting as you lost the ability to kiss him back from how hard you were panting. That didn’t stop him from still pressing his lips against your unmoving ones and he only seemed to notice the reason for your distraction when you spread your legs even more to try to get him to press down in between them again.
“You like that baby?” His voice was low and husky and your eyes shot up to his at the sound of it, nodding your head and whining when he rolled himself down onto your aching core and kept his gaze on yours the entire time. “Want me to touch you there so bad don’t you.”
You knew it was more of an observation than a question but you kept nodding your head stupidly so there was no room for him to misunderstand how much you truly wanted that.
“Please.” Your voice was breathier than you’d ever heard it and his eyebrows furrowed for a second like he was in pain. “Need it Jay, please.”
His lips were back on yours the second you finished your gentle pleads and you outwardly moaned this time at the feeling of his tongue licking into your mouth, completely filthy in the way he was moving against you and running his hand up your thigh at the same time.
You were desperately rolling your hips up in an attempt to meet his again but he was brutally holding back for some reason, letting you get more and more desperate as you made out until he was finally pushing your skirt up enough that you could understand what he wanted to do to you.
He gave you one last long kiss before he was shifting away from you and lowering himself to his knees infront of the counter, your wide eyes watching him as he pushed your skirt high up on your hips so he had a full view of what was underneath. You had no time to be insecure about what kind of underwear you were wearing or what he could be thinking because he was pulling it down your thighs and groaning to himself at the sight of you.
“Fuck you get so wet just from kissing.” He was almost talking to himself instead of you but you still whined impatiently at the lewd wording, shifting even further onto the edge of the counter as much as your humiliation would allow you.
“Do something, anything.” You were even more embarrassed that you felt like you had no idea what you were asking for.
You weren’t a stranger to the idea of sex and what all came before it if you got lucky (which clearly you finally had) but the specifics were a bit lost on you especially with somebody with close to double your lifetime of experience.
Clearly this didn’t matter to him because he was disappearing from your sight and putting his mouth on you before you could ask him for it again. Your mouth dropped open in a low sound you didn’t know you could make and your hands gripped the counter and wall simultaneously to stop yourself from instinctively closing your legs or running from the foreign feeling.
You’d never imagined a few days ago that Jay would have even kissed you again let alone been eating you on with his wife and son right downstairs but you felt like your entire world shifted just from the sensation of his tongue on you.
“Fuck.” You felt dumb for being at a complete loss when it came to what you could say but there was no chance you were getting out more than that especially since he was wasting no time before he was actively licking into you and wrapping his mouth around your clit.
Your hips rolled against his movements on their own and you could’ve cried from how good it felt, his large hands wrapped around your legs and ankles to keep your pliant for him even though there was nothing that could make you stop now.
Even the thought of Jungwon getting curious about your absence and coming to search for you wasn’t making you hesitant in the desperate way you moved your hand to Jays short black hair to pull him into you.
“Taste so good.” His own voice sounded similar to the state of yours now, breathy and desperate in a way that majorly stroked your ego. “Can’t believe I didn’t have you before.”
“You have me now.” You were practically whining the words and you were scooting even closer to try to get him to stop talking and keep making you feel good already. “Keep going Jay please.”
That was all he needed to hear to dive back into licking you, tongue bringing you sensations you hadn’t even known were possible. It was taking everything in you not to lose yourself in the moment and moan and cry for him, lip bitten harshly between your teeth with small sounds escaping.
“S-so good.” You felt like you were going crazy and the few times you’d made yourself finish on your own was nothing compared to what was happening now, completely coming undone with your legs tensing around his head which didn’t do much to deter him.
You couldn’t barely catch your breath before he was back to standing and roughly kissing you again, slamming you back against the mirror and letting his hands come up to grope at your thighs and chest like he was a man starved.
“Such a good girl for me.” He was speaking in between the borderline filthy kisses he was giving you and you whined at the praise, head filled with that staticky feeling you got whenever he said something similar. “You love being good for daddy don’t you?”
Your eyes widened at the title so casually slipped into the sentence and his eyebrow cocked looking down at you, pausing from licking into your mouth so he could fully watch your response.
You were quick to nod in agreement to his statement and kiss him again, a lot more gentle this time.
“Don’t let her get you upset, she’s nothing.” It took you a few dizzy seconds to understand what he was talking about and your heart clenched when you remembered the reason you were upset in the first place.
“She’s just so…” You didn’t really know how to explain that the fact she was everything you weren’t was driving you crazy despite clearly seeing you were more welcomed in her own home than she was.
Once again it seemed like he knew what you were thinking without actually hearing it come from your mouth and you could do nothing but pout stupidly while he caressed your hair and adjusted your skirt to where it was more presentable, a silent end to what you’d been doing just a few seconds ago as the mood shifted drastically.
“She’s nothing compared to you.” He was borderline whispering as he pulled you off the counter and into him, bodies pressing together in a way that made your head spin. You rocked forward onto your toes so you’d be able to kiss him again and he accepted without hesitation.
It was a lot easier to go to your room and rest than you figured it would be but you’d grown more comfortable here as of late and your heart didn’t feel heavy knowing he was downstairs lying that you had felt sick.
——
The next few days you saw less of Jay than you would’ve liked and your only real interactions came from dinner time small talk or the handful of times he managed to get you alone in a room, which didn’t leave you much time for conversation considering the fact his tongue was practically shoved down your throat whenever the opportunity presented itself.
You didn’t take it personally knowing he was busy with work and you almost hated to admit that the thought of him being stressed about his very adult job turned you on as much as it worried you.
Beside it wasn’t like you were capable of feeling lonely with Jungwon at your side even more than he usually was, potentially hiding out from his mother and whatever awkward talks she thought it was her duty to fulfill because of her absence.
He’d lay in your bed reading while you sat at the desk scanning the newspaper for local part time jobs and the two of you had even taken up the tradition of going for walks after dinner.
Jungwon was providing a great comfort to you that was only ever shifted when you were forced to remember he wasn’t just your bestfriend and you couldn’t confide in him about your tough situation without breaking your heart. Something in you crumbled everytime he tried to kiss you during a laughfest and you could only take so much more handholding before you considered cutting yours off.
He wasn’t doing anything wrong of course, playing his part of your loving boyfriend, but you still couldn’t shake the sensation that he wasn’t the one you were supposed to be kissing.
You’d even dodged him the other night when he attempted to kiss you with his dad in the other room, stomach turning uncomfortably at the thought of Jay seeing that despite the fact he was sleeping in the same bed as his wife most nights.
“I just don’t understand why she can’t like me.” You were stuck on the idea of her far past your ridiculous jealously, overly scorned by her indifference or outright disgust whenever the two of you had to be in the same vicinity.
“She doesn’t really like anyone Y/N.” Jungwon was sighing softly and you turned your head that was resting on his stomach in an attempt to look at him with an annoyed expression. “I thought knowing about you and my dad would make her rethink stuff but I don’t know.”
Your entire body locked up at the vagueness of his sentence and the fact he’d even referred to you two as a pair of any kind, paranoia and panic hitting you despite not hearing any sign of upset or anger in your boyfriends typically calm tone.
“Me and your dad?” Your voice squeezed the words out and he gave you a weird look that only made your head fill with more terrible possibilities.
“Yeah? Just how often the two of you talk to each other.” His casualness did little to ease your inner turmoil but you stayed quiet as he talked. “I explained to her how you don’t have a good relationship with your own dad and how you sometimes go to mine for advice and whatnot.”
Your body flooded with both relief towards the fact he clearly had no idea about your affair but also guilt and slight disgust knowing that your boyfriend had so much trust in you that even the knowledge of you and his dad being alone together frequently didn’t make him think twice about your innocence.
If anything he’d been even sweeter than you imagined and hoped you were getting advice and help from his family member.
You couldn’t help but feel anger towards his mother knowing that she was aware of you and Jay “talking” privately a lot because you already knew she didn’t have as pure as thoughts about it as her son did.
It bothered you until you and Jungwon got home and even more so when he was kissing you gently and wishing you a goodnight before going to his own room, leaving you standing in the hallway and seriously debating what you should do.
A big part of you considered just walking out of the house in general, already mentally drafting up the apology you’d give your father as you begged him to allow you to come back home.
The other part was the one leading you down to the room Jay shared with his wife and forcing you to push the door open without knocking. You had a moment to appreciate how lucky you’d been that she wasn’t actually there but it was gone as soon as you saw he was.
“Y/N? Baby are you alright?” He was putting down whatever files he had been shifting through and approaching you as soon as the door closed but your sour expression and hand coming up to keep him away made him freeze in place.
“What if I did let him touch me?” You didn’t say the name because of how forbidden it felt but you both knew exactly what you were talking about. His face remained the same but you could see his shoulders tighten and you knew you’d hit a sore spot. “What if he touched me and it was good, if it felt right?”
Whatever had stopped him from approaching him earlier was gone now and you stood there with caught breath as he closed the distance, standing a hair away and staring down at you and your face that you knew resembled a scolded child.
The air in the room was heavy and you could almost physically feeling it weigh you done but you still couldn’t deny the heat coursing through you at the idea of him being upset with you and thinking you needed to be taught some sort of lesson, accompanied by the familiar ache and longing to please him and take back what you had just said despite knowing you wanted a response.
“Would it be the same?” His voice was low and your body responded to it immediately, eyes nearly fluttering shut as you leaned against his chest. “Would it be better, would it be what you actually want?”
“I don’t know what I want.” You knew it was a lie as you said it because everything you could possibly be craving was standing right infront of you, big hands cupping your face like you belonged to him and not somebody else.
You wanted to kiss him right now more than you wanted to breathe, silently willing the conversation to end without any resolution just so you didn’t have to wait a second longer. He wasn’t reading your mind this time but his thumb was gently caressing over the skin of your cheek and the small gesture was enough for now.
“Yes you do.” He was nodding as he said it like he was coaxing you along and you watched him like his word was gospel. “You want somebody who can take care of you, you want to feel good and you know only I can do that.”
“Show me.” Your voice came out in a breath and he seemed like he was pleased with your response even though you figured he already knew there was no actual weight to your words and you weren’t having second thoughts. “Make me feel good.”
He was kissing you before you could say anything else and you immediately melted into the now familiar feeling, bringing your hands up to hold onto his arms and make sure he didn’t go anywhere in the world other than with you.
The stolen moments you’d had recently were nothing compared to actually being able to have him kissing you without a time limit, pushing you back softly until your legs were hitting the bed and you were falling backwards.
He’d already braced your body against his so you landed softly but you were growing impatient with the new pace he’d taken on, lacking the usual roughness and desperation you’d grown so addicted to.
“Jay.” You were managing to push the whine out only because he moved his kissing down to your neck, still soothing his hand over your face and hair gently while he left marks you knew you wouldn’t be able to explain. “I need more.”
“You’ll get it.” He was quick to shut you down and remind you that he was overwhelmingly in charge of your entire situation.
Regardless it was affective in shutting you up and allowing him to do whatever he wanted, your own hands smoothing over the shape of his muscular back and shoulders. You were quickly finding yourself unhealthy obsessed with every part of him and you felt extremely thankful he was pushing your skirt up at the same time you came to that realization.
It wasn’t lost on you that he was marking you up in the same bed he shared with his wife and you almost automatically spread your legs for him to slot between at the thought.
“Gonna take my time and make you feel taken care of another day.” He sounded almost pained and annoyed at himself but you couldn’t bother being upset about what he was implying when he roughly pulled your underwear done and started to fumble with his belt. “Just need you right now.”
“You can take me.” Your mouth parted with a desperate need at the image of his shirt riding up from his hands movements, giving you just enough of a glimpse of his happy trail and tanned skin before he was moving it back down to remove his belt all the way.
No part of you was minding the lack of romance or the fact he wasn’t drawing out the first time you actually got to feel him all the way, wanting him more than anything you could even begin to compare this to.
“It’s gonna hurt baby.” His warning did nothing but light up the heat in you more and you didn’t need to tell him that considering the dazed expression you had, hearing him laugh a little at your excitement. “That’s my good girl I know you can handle it.”
He wasn’t lying about the pain you’d feel and your entire body tensed up at the sudden intrusion you felt, no prep or warning given as he relied solely on how wet and willing you were for him. Your mouth dropped open again but this time from the sharp ache only the tip of him caused, thankful that it hurt so much you couldn’t actually let out a noise.
“Fuck.” You couldn’t think of anything else to say but that seemed to do the trick in getting his attention back on you and not how tightly you were squeezing him, bringing his lips back down to meet yours and offer some distraction.
“God you’re so tight.” He sounded almost equally as wounded although you knew it was for much different reasons, fighting within himself to not just start fucking you right away.
The urge to please him and not make him wait was slowly creeping up again the longer he stayed still inside you and you felt your hips shifting before you even decided you were ready for more, rolling up slowly and urging him to fill you up and let himself feel you.
There was no hesitance on his part but he still went as slow as he possibly could, swallowing your whines and cries of pain with his tongue in your mouth and a soothing hand rubbing alongside your stomach like he was physically guiding himself inside.
“Cmon princess.” His low voice made you snap your eyes back open, not even realizing you had closed them, watching him and his expressions that were a lot more fond and affectionate than you thought they’d be right now. “Gotta relax for me.”
You wondered for just a second if he was fully inside you or if there was somehow more to push in, too nervous to look down and confirm it might be the latter. You let yourself take a few deep breaths as you stared at him and it was easier to feel the pleasure in your core when you could actually see his handsome face above yours.
“Fuck me.” You’d meant to sound alot sexier than you had but the sweet and begging tone was clearly enough for him because he did exactly that.
You could’ve swore your entire world shattered at the feeling of Jay actually fucking himself into you and claiming you in a way that nobody else had yet, pained whimpers quickly replaced with desperate whines that got covered by his hand on your mouth when you started to get too loud.
His other hand was moving anywhere it could to feel you and you found yourself cursing the fact he was still clothed, wanting to touch his skin and see the shift in his muscles as he fucked you open.
“That’s right baby just like that, let daddy take you.” He was talking again and that alone was nearly enough to push you over the edge, eyes watering at the satisfaction in his words. “Such a good girl for me just like I knew you’d be.”
Your legs spread wider instinctively and you felt him deeper and deeper with every thrust, whining so loud you were almost positive anybody else in the house was going to hear you.
The idea of that or more specifically of his wife hearing how good her husband was fucking you in her bed was driving you to near insanity and you were grateful his hand was firmly over your mouth to stop you from saying things you might regret outside of the heat of the moment.
Jay either didn’t notice or didn’t care but he wasn’t stopping his pace or filthy words that only encourage your noises even when your stomach was clenching up with release and you were mindlessly rolling your hips to try to feel more of him.
He fucked you through it and you almost thought he wouldn’t stop even after you came so hard you felt exhaustion ripping through you but he was pulling out and finishing on your bare stomach only a few seconds after that, no doubt driven to his own release by how much tighter you’d squeezed him.
Your mouth was back on his before you’d even processed what you’d done, what finally line you’d crossed, and he was eagerly accepting it. He rolled the two of you around easily so you were the one laying on top of him and you appreciated the small amount of control offered, giving you the ability to stop and go to clean up whenever you needed.
For now you just wanted to be close to him and you didn’t feel the sense that want would fade anytime soon.
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