#but for some reason their songs always leave me feeling like they had the potential to hit MUCH harder

[wekillitwithfire]

you know, i STILL struggle to put into words my feelings on Lovejoy’s music. one of these days tho ill get it

[runnning-outof-time]

I’m (Not) Alright with a Slow Burn | Tommy Shelby x Reader headcanons

Request: yes by anonymous

Pairing: Tommy Shelby x Reader (headcanons)

Summary: How Tommy would go about being stuck in a slow burn with someone he's falling for.

Warnings: mention of death of grandmother, slight season 2 spoilers

Word Count: 2537

A/N: I really enjoyed this request! umm…I’m not sure if these are 100% written like headcanons - I wrote them like I was spewing out ideas lol. Kacey Musgraves’s song Slow Burn was also running through my head while I was writing this, hence the title. Also how the hell do you actually spell headcanons?? Is there 1 ‘n’ or 2?? Lol . Enjoy! :)

I’D LOVE TO KNOW WHAT YOU THINK! - YOUR COMMENTS & REBLOGS HELP ME WRITE!

Comment/Message me if you want to be tagged!

• (Y/N) was one of the few Shelby Company Ltd. employees that Tommy didn't hire. She was brought on board while he and the boys were off at one of the races. Polly saw the potential in her and immediately welcomed her into the company.

• when Tommy returned from said races, he was pleasantly surprised to meet her.

• and Polly clocked that immediately. She was able to tell by the lack of a fight - Tommy was always able to find something to pick at when she made decisions within the company, no matter how minuscule. But there was nothing to pick at with (Y/N).

• Polly also wasn't surprised to see (Y/N) completing more and more tasks that came directly from Tommy. They'd be tasks that Polly hadn't even known about...but for some reason Tommy trusted (Y/N) with them.

• (Y/N) didn't think anything different about it. She'd been hired into the company and one of her bosses was asking her to do things. That's what was supposed to happen, right?

• although she did find it odd that it was Tommy asking her to do these things when she'd originally been hired to help Polly with sorting out the books and the like.

• things persisted like that for a few months. (Y/N) would happily and eagerly help him with whatever he needed to have done around the company. He'd look out for her, making sure that she was happy in her position and just in general. And in return, (Y/N) would (try) to keep up the same for him. She'd show that in the smallest of ways and attempts, but he would notice. Over those few months and because of those small acts, Tommy's thoughts and feelings towards (Y/N) evolved.

• he can still remember the day when that switch began - because it haunted him every day after.

• she came into his office like it was any other day for her...but it wasn't any other day for Tommy.

• he'd been working under Campbell for a few weeks at that point, and it'd become apparent that he'd be dead at the end of the arrangement. Tommy wasn't afraid to die, but the thought of getting everything in order and making sure his family could go on without him was now plaguing his mind.

• so when (Y/N) asked him what he had for her to do today, Tommy rattled off his list without as much as looking up at her. He was fully expecting her to turn and exit the second he finished speaking.

• she didn't. Silence reigned for a moment or two before "are you ok, Tommy?" came quietly from her. This made Tommy look up, and when he did, all of the noise in his mind ceased. Sure he looked at her before - he'd looked up like this thousands of times, but he never saw her like he did when he looked up this time. It was this otherworldly experience that he'd only been through twice before. Which meant he knew exactly what was happening.

• even though he brushed her question off and told her that he was fine, he hoped that things wouldn't change between them.

• and thankfully they didn't because hell, Tommy Shelby was certain that he was falling in love.

• he began testing the waters carefully at first. (Y/N) was a good woman and he wasn't about to make her leave the company due to his actions. He couldn't stand to lose her.

• so he started by making sure she was being heard; by actually listening to her whenever she'd share ideas or tell him how things played out with what he'd asked her to do.

• then he emphasized making sure that she was safe - having blinders on her block, sticking around on the days where she and Polly would be in the shop tallying the winnings, and also personally offering to take her wherever she needed to go.

• (Y/N) reacted bashfully to these offers. She felt that the other company employees would think that she was getting special treatment or something — well...she kind of was...but she deeply appreciated Tommy doing these things.

• in regards to feelings, Tommy was putting his out there as best as he could (which, well I'll let you be the one to decide on how well that is) He really tried to make a more personal connection with her; to get to know her as her and not just another employee...and in turn he let her know him.

• (Y/N) stayed professional. He was one of her bosses after all. But she couldn't deny that she enjoyed being in his presence. Her friends found that crazy, too...how can she be happy to be spending time with Tommy Shelby? She swore it off as strictly work related until she couldn't anymore.

• the evening started like any other...(Y/N) went home after work with the intention of doing what she did every other evening. But something was waiting for her at home. Something that turned her world upside-down. She found out that her grandmother had passed away. The post had come and one of the letters was from a sibling of hers, sharing the news. She didn't know what to do.

• after exhausting all of her options, she found herself at the Garrison. Tommy had invited her there in the past, but she never accepted it due to wanting to stay professional.

• she asked around for him and the second she found out that he was in the snug, she made her way to it and opened the door. He was in there, but so were his brothers. "This was the last place I could think of," she blurted out. "Everyone out," was all Tommy needed to say before it was just the two of them in the room.

• (Y/N) quickly sat and let everything out. Tommy listened intently, something no one had ever done for her in the past. They sat in the snug for hours, (Y/N) talking and Tommy listening. Her ability to share her grandmother's story helped her immensely.

• from that evening, (Y/N) saw Tommy in a different light. The fact that he sat and listened to her as she lamented to him and not once did he even think of leaving meant the world to her. No one had shown her that sort of worthiness or attention.

• all at once it felt like she was head over heels for him. Like all of those little instances he'd shown her before had all culminated into this one, major display of devotion. It had her realizing that maybe it wasn't solely because she was his employee...maybe it was much more than that.

• and so when he went out of his way and made sure to check on her the next morning - she knew this because Polly commented on the fact that he was supposed to be in London by sun-up - and he couldn't get him off of her mind no matter how hard she tried, she couldn't beat around the bush anymore...she'd fallen for Tommy Shelby, hard.

• but things didn't hit off right from that moment.

• no, it took a rather long time for those feelings to actually come out.

• there was a lot of dancing around the other - the smaller gestures and moments still occurred, but neither one was willing to make that jump over the edge and confront the other about it.

• yes, you read that right...Tommy Shelby was actually keeping his feelings for her close to the chest.

• mostly it was because of the position they were in. He'd offer to take her to dinner and she'd politely decline (even though she really wanted to go) because she was worried the other company employees would suspect something.

• Tommy wasn't exactly into the dancing around it (he hated it at times actually), but he honored her choice.

• but that doesn't mean he wasn't taking every chance he got to spend time around her. To check in on her and see how things were. To walk her home if she stayed later. Anything to show her that he was serious...without actually saying that he was serious.

• he was hooked on her though, there was no doubt about it. All he needed was for her to really show that interest back to him, and then he'd know for sure that he could act on it.

• and then Polly's birthday came.

• the company/family decided to host a party at the Garrison. Of course (Y/N) was invited.

• a man named Louis was one of the men who worked the shop floor daily. He saw (Y/N) almost every day that she was also on the floor, and he made it a point to seek her out as well.

• much like with Tommy, (Y/N) kept things between her and Louis strictly professional.

• but this party is when Louis decided that he was going to make his move...to try and woo her.

• maybe he should have thought this through...

• (Y/N) was sitting at one of the tables, chatting with some of the other women who worked within the company. It was a surprise that she wasn't with Tommy, considering he sought her out almost immediately after she arrived. But Tommy was still present though.

• Louis had this plan to put everything right on the table. He smoothly walked over to her and, equally as smoothly, slipped into the booth that she was sitting in. (Y/N) was polite, but it was obvious that she wasn't feeding any more into it than a simple, friendly conversation.

• but of course Tommy didn't pick up on that. From where he was standing it looked like Louis was a little too close to her for comfort. So he quickly intervened.

• and he was anything but subtle with it. He was quickly able to make Louis feel uneasy and clear him out.

• (Y/N)'s confused, but happy to have the man she'd hardly talked to gone. She sends Tommy an appreciative smile and that's just about enough to bring Tommy to his knees. But that doesn't happen...instead he gives her one of his signature, lop-sided smiles and nods at the ladies sitting with her before going back to where he previously was.

• this interaction didn't go unnoticed though. Polly and Ada were watching from off to the side. These two know Tommy better than anyone, and they've rarely seen him react this quickly and in this sort of way. So it's glaringly apparent to them that something's going on here.

• and this becomes increasingly apparent as time goes on.

• also as time goes on, (Y/N) manages to move up in the company. She's basically right underneath Polly in terms of power, becoming her 'right hand man’ in the treasurer position.

• having this position means that she's more involved in the inner circle and is at all of the meetings.

• the entire family swears by the fact that Tommy is softer with her than he is with anyone else.

• you can literally see the change the second she shares her thoughts on a matter or even enters a room. The switch is practically on a dime.

• but these two keep dancing around each other - they've been doing it for close to a year at this point.

• and those who know of it are baffled. They are obviously in love with each other...why hasn't one budged and made things official?

• the suspicions on this topic all come to a climax on the first year anniversary of (Y/N) joining the company.

• Tommy invites her out to dinner. (Y/N) agrees this time mostly because she knows what day it is...and she knows that the Shelbys like to celebrate such things.

• but she's surprised when she arrives at the upscale restaurant and is escorted to a table for two. Tommy can't help but smile at the face she pulls when she sees that he's sitting there, waiting for her.

• but she gets comfortable very quickly. It's Tommy we're talking about here...she's never been more comfortable with anyone in her life if she was being honest. And the same goes for him too.

• the dinner lasts hours. They talk about everything and anything. Work's off the table, but yet they still manage to not have more than a moment of silence. Both are surprised at how freely the conversation flows.

• eventually Tommy brings up the subject they've been dancing around.

• he lays everything out on the table this time. There's no sense in holding back. He tells her how she makes him feel, how she's made him feel from the moment he first saw her.

• he also mentions the fact that he's felt this way for a while now, and that he can't continue dancing around it any longer. He honored her desire to stay professional for this time, but he wants her too much, loves her too much to keep going like this for even a day longer.

• at first (Y/N)'s shocked. She's not oblivious...she'd been catching the little hints that he'd been leaving all this time, but she was truthfully too hesitant to ever bring the subject up to him.

• but now that he's put it out there, she figures why should she hold back her feelings any longer?

• so she lays it all out for him as well. Tells him how she feels about him, how she's felt about him for some time now.

• Tommy can't contain his happiness as he hears this. He's grinning like a fool.

• so really there's only one last thing for them to do now...make it official.

• Tommy wastes no time in doing that.

• he asks her properly though. That's what she deserves, especially after all this time that's been invested.

• he stops them just down the road from where she lives. He tells her that he really likes her (he won't use the 'l word' just yet - even though the two of them are so clearly in love) and that he can't wait a moment longer to make her his.

• (Y/N) quickly agrees with the sentiment after everything that had been shared during their dinner.

• Tommy can't help but smile at her response, and he just barely nods his head in his Tommy fashion before continuing to walk her home.

• they share their first kiss at the front door, and it's absolutely magical.

• they then proceed to do a terrible job of hiding it while at work. Tommy's waited this long to be with her, he's not going hide his affection for her any longer.

• their definition of 'in secret' is soooo far from the actual definition. They think that they're being sneaky, only stealing kisses in empty hallways and in Tommy's office, but it takes Polly literally only two days to catch onto it.

• no ones upset with it though. Honestly everyone’s happy that they’re finally together.

• well everyone except Louis…Louis is a little bummed about the whole thing. But Tommy and (Y/N) don’t care about that in the slightest.

Tagged: @mystcldydrms @the-anxious-youth @cloudofdisney @look-at-the-soul @elenavampire21 @mrsalwayswrite @julkaamazing @evita-shelby @notyour-valentine @shelbydelrey @theshelbyslimited @peakyswritings @just-a-blackhole @watercolorskyy @strayrockette @peakyduchesss @alexxavicry @captivatedbycillianmurphy @yummycastiel @dark-academia-slut @tommystargirl @emotionalcadaver @stevie75 @lyarr24 @signorellisantichrist @zablife @anotherblinder @cillmequick @dandelionprints @letal-y-poetica @garrison-girl-08 @insanitybyanothername @depxiety @raincoffeeandfandoms @dragons-are-my-favorite @forgottenpeakywriter @cljordan-imperium @brummiereader @red-riding-wood @everythingelseisextra @little-diable @thomashelbyswife @shaddixlife

MASTERLIST

[aziraphales-library]

Hi all! Thank you very much for all of your hard work. I've glad for this account since there is always something fun to read popping up. Can the Mods recommend any fics where either Aziraphale or Crowley use dating apps for any reason?

Hello. You'll find fics like this, including some of the fics listed here, on our #social media tag, but here are some dating app specific fics...

Bloggers, Baby! by Estrella3791 (T)

Crowley's a blogger, and he may or may not be developing a crush on his commenters. But he's not really - Oh, what's this? Angel1941 is on Tinder??

Oh, Lord, Heal This Love by WaitingToBeBroken (T)

"Looking for someone to take to couples therapy and see how long it takes the therapist to notice we don't know each other," is what Crowley's dating profile says. Too bad Aziraphale was too busy staring at those graceful fingers in his picture to realise that, before he agreed to go on a date with him.

abide by me by cosmya (T)

The year is 2001. Crowley runs a fake marriage website, and Aziraphale has encountered a... problem that requires his services. Naturally, they have No Idea that it's each other at first, but when Aziraphale proves a difficult client, Crowley takes matters into his own hands.

Dim the Lights and Sing You Songs by Polaris (E)

A few months prior to leaving the Dowling household, Crowley had downloaded Grindr for the sole purpose of catfishing randy morons. He was not expecting a paragraph that began with: ‘hello. I hope you don’t think this is too forward, but I couldn’t help but notice you have the most lovely nipples.’ Crowley keeps trying to meet his Grindr fuckbuddy. Aziraphale keeps showing up at all his meeting spots. This is terrible.

MatchMade! by amaruuk (E)

Crowley tests a new dating app for an online publication. When his match dumps him for another man's match, he and his fellow dumpee take a chance on each other.

With Potential by Caedmon (E)

Aziraphale is an author of popular and successful romance novels. His books have done very well, so he's surprised when his publisher, Gabriel, comes in and tells him that they expect him to start including explicit sex scenes instead of just the fade-to-black he's been writing. Aziraphale argues a bit, but it's pointless. Gabriel isn't asking, he's telling. And now Aziraphale is in a pickle. He doesn't have a wide swath of sexual experience to pull inspiration from. So his assistant, Anathema, helpfully suggests that he download some dating apps and seek someone to hook up with for casual sex. Aziraphale is appalled by the idea of casual sex at first, and thinks that this plan is going to go absolutely nowhere, but agrees to give it a try. Three guesses what happens next.

The Grindr Logo Doesn't Even Have a 'G' In It by indieninja92 (E)

After the Apocalypse, Aziraphale ventures into a new space in the gay milieu - Grindr. There he starts talking to a charming young man who certainly doesn't bear any resemblance at all to a certain long streak of demon, not one bit, no thank you. Meanwhile, Aziraphale and Crowley navigate their friendship after the world failed to end. There is much drinking and silliness, but could it be that there are other feelings lurking underneath?? Of course there are, this is fanfic.

The Mathematical Improbability of Reaching the Stars by cassieoh, D20Owlbear (M)

Aziraphale, 3rd year doctoral candidate in Library Sciences and current failure at Astronomy 101, finds out about an app for meeting people from some undergraduates. He’s desperate for a tutor so he decides to try it out. Surely someone in the wilds of Tinder is willing to help him learn about the stars? Meanwhile, in said wilds of Tinder, Crowley (high school dropout, star enthusiast, and official garden center plant-harasser) is not really looking for anything past dinner and maybe ‘tea’ back at their place. Hijinks, and also a surprisingly intricate plot, ensue.

- Mod D

[merp-blerp]

TW: Discussion of sexual assault and suicidal ideation

I've been seeing some debate about Calypso and whether or not she sexually assaulted Odysseus and I want to throw in my two cents.

I'll say straight out of the gate that I don't currently like her much. I feel pretty icky about her personally.

Comparing Ody's behavior in Epic prior to "Love in Paradise" vs during the song feels so... clearly different. He seems very traumatized by whatever has been happening on that isle. It almost feels out of character for him to consider dying instead of fighting to get home alive like he had been, but putting myself in his shoes I can see how he came to that through what's textually known. He has been trapped on that isle for 7 years—that's nearly a decade, with no way to get out, everyone he knows and loves dead or far away with no way to know where he is or if he's alive. While I obviously would never think that's a good decision, I can see how he got to the point of wanting to end it. And if he's been sexually assaulted like he was in The Odyssey, I understand it more due to how that can warp a person's mental health.

I've seen some say, "Calypso is just a sweetie who doesn't know how to love properly" (paraphrasing of an actual comment I've seen). Even if she really just doesn't know how to care for a mortal, as many of the gods seemingly don't, I think she understands her power over mortals with her "Bow down now to the immortal Calypso" comment. She also understands that Odysseus doesn't want her, with the first part of her response to Ody's threats being "Oh handsome, you may try". She knows that he may try to escape by killing her (even though she can't die). Honestly, why would she feel the need to trap him if she didn't know good and well that he would want to escape her? She knew what she was doing was something that would make him want to run. Calypso being a goddess automatically gives their dynamic a power imbalance of course. Even though the assault is only implied, the fact that she's trapping Ody against his will, super infatuated by him, and still says "Soon, into bed we'll climb and spend our time", makes me feel like the indication is clear. What's stopping her from trying to have "sex" with him (sex isn't sex without consent)? She's already ignored all his declines. She seems to think that forcing her "love" onto him will make him love her. Yes, she uses lovey-dovey language so I doubt it would've appeared violent, but sexual assault doesn't have to look violent and the perpetrator doesn't have to appear aggressive. It's telling that I've seen some say, "Save that energy for Antinous" because Antinous is much more obviously bad, but this kind of thing isn't always obvious. That kind of assault is still extremely traumatizing whether it's sugarcoated as if it's love or not. It's dismaying that some reactions to Calypso bypass her potential assaulting or "She's weird, but she seems to care for him!" And since the sexual part of the assault is technically subtext (for now, who knows about later), I'll say that even if Calypso didn't sexually harm him, she still forces physical and verbal intimacy onto him and traps him so he can't leave. We see that. That's still assault. The only reason why I don't feel similarly about Epic's version of Circe is that her intent wasn't to have sex with Ody but to distract and throw him off with talk of sex so she could stab him as he's vulnerable; Circe never wanted to have sex with Ody in actuality. Calypso's intent was romantic intimacy and she didn't care if Odysseus said no, she completely bypassed it. Calypso saying "You're mine, all mine" feels as threatening as Circe's "I've got you" was meant to be.

Anything can change between now and the next two sagas. It could either be fully confirmed or denied that sexual assault took place. I actually don't expect either, as I don't think Jay would go too deep into such a traumatic concept in Epic, but then again I also didn't expect suicidal ideation to be brought up at all and it absolutely shocked me when it was, so I could be wrong. But whether it's confirmed or not, I don't blame any Epic fans who don't like Calypso or even hate her over what she did and what it's implied she did. It's icky watching some fans tell others they shouldn't hate Calypso because of this or that as if this isn't a sensitive and complex topic. It's creepy. I don't think we should tell people not to hate a character associated with sexual assault. The sexual assault might be subtext, but subtext is important and sometimes is implemented intentionally. Not every part of a story is going to be given to you at face value. Just because "Epic didn't say that" doesn't mean that the implication doesn't matter. People interact with stories in different ways, so you can disagree with others—no one can take that from you, but you don't get to tell someone they can't feel a certain way about a character. I don't like saying this because I really shouldn't have to put it in this perspective for it to be understood, but I can't help but feel like if Calypso and Ody's genders were swapped some people would treat this implication differently. Sexually or not she hurts him.

Normally I don't like taking lore from The Odyssey and automatically applying it to Epic, as Epic has changed a lot of rules from The Odyssey because Jay wants to tell this story his own story. For example, I personally choose not to assume Eury and Ody are brothers-in-law in Epic like they are in The Odyssey because that hasn't been stated in Epic so far. But to me, the implications of Ody's sexual assault are there enough for me personally to think that it might take place in both stories. Jay seems to want Epic to be accessible to many people, so it doesn't surprise me that this element of The Odyssey was brought up in a more subtextual/"hinted at" way.

Calypso is a very interesting character, maybe the most out of all the Epic antagonists so far for me, but we don't have to think of her as not doing anything wrong in order to enjoy that character, her songs, her cute physical character design, or Barbara Wangui's beautiful voice.

[The remainder of this post contains potential spoilers for the unreleased (to date) Vengeance Saga under the cut]

[Edit: Now complete with some post-Vengeance Saga release points]

Another defense of Calypso I've seen is that in the snippets for "I'm Not Sorry for Loving You", Ody says he loves Calypso, but not in the way she wants him to. This could mean they're friends and therefore doubt about the sexual assault could be cast.

It's hard to assess this because the saga's not out yet, but it's worth remembering that abuse can come out of care, in a complicated way. You can care for someone so much you end up hurting them, usually out of wanting to control them. Calypso seems to fit that concept. And most Epic snippets don't give full context, naturally, so who knows why Ody says this at the moment. Maybe he means it, or maybe he's bluffing to guarantee he'll get what he wants (which is to be set free in this instance), like when meeting Athena, or to appease a god, like when "apologizing" to Poseidon in "Ruthlessness". And of course, victims don't have to hate their perpetrators if they choose not to. Odysseus can care about Calypso and she can still have hurt him really badly. Both of these things can be true.

The way I read it, Calypso doesn't love Odysseus like she thinks she does. She's infatuated by him and cares for him enough to not be obviously cold like all the other obstacles Ody faced initially are. She declares that she loves him as soon as he wakes up on her isle without knowing him at all. She didn't even know his name. The washed-up person on her isle could've been anyone and she likely would've "loved" them. Calypso only loves Ody because he stops her loneliness, not for who he is. When she begins to state that she loves him she doesn't even know him. Over the 7 years, she seems to have potentially gotten to know him a bit, saying "I know your life's been hard", but Odysseus himself asserts that she doesn't really know what he's been through. You can call someone (against their will, let me remind you) "my dear, my love for life" all you want, but that doesn't mean you love them. Ody's her first companion in years if not ever, of course she cares for him on a basic level. She won't kill him or let him jump off a cliff. But she doesn't love him or treat him like a human and obey his boundaries and wants. She treats him like an object or pet she owns and has to guard.

In "I'm Not Sorry For Loving You" Calypso says that Ody is all she's ever known because she was abandoned. It's understandable that she would latch onto a living creature after being alone for so long. But that's not necessarily love, at least not to me. If I love someone I wouldn't bypass their refusal to do something. And I wouldn't trap them with me and not let them go, even when they're about to jump off a cliff because they see no way out. I'm not sure if Calypso means to bring malice, she at least says she "bring(s) no pain", but she does regardless or if she intends to. Calypso hasn't had anyone in her company, let alone someone to love, for so long, maybe in her whole life. That's why she doesn't know what love is, so of course when she catches fickle feelings for Odysseus she assumes that's love and has no clue what to do with her "love", as she admits in "I'm Not Sorry For Loving You". Calypso's actions are understandable, but that doesn't mean they're excusable or not abusive. What she does to him is understandable, but selfish and only serves herself, which isn't what you do to someone you love. Note that the way I use understandable here does not equate to forgivable, it just means conceivable. And her apology to him really waters down the magnitude of her actions, saying she "pushed" him, "came on too strong", and that her love might've been "too much" for Ody.

I apologize for this being such a long rant, but I wanted to cover all the excuses for Calypso I'd seen and speak my mind on why I think they're misguided at best.

Post-Vengeance Saga Edits:

Now that The Vengeance Saga has been released, I can comfortably say that I still don't like Calypso, and I think this saga just encourages me to do that. I wasn't anticipating the entirety of "I'm Not Sorry for Loving You" to basically have been featured in the snippets. I was expecting the official song to give more context, maybe showcasing Ody and Calypso having a dialogue, but no! That was really it. And I'm honestly happy for it. It seems like the show recognizes that Calypso is in the wrong, with the way we aren't meant to really ruminate on Ody leaving her. The excuse I talked about above using the theory that Calypso and Odysseus would turn out to have been friends because he said he loved her? I just don't think that held much water by release. I particularly want to point out the way @gigizetz drew Ody's face as he leaves in the commissioned animatic from Jay's stream:

While I can't say for certain that he doesn't mean the "I love you" in some way... he doesn't look like he means it to me. There's no lovey-softness in his eyes, like you might have when you look at your friends when saying I love you. He looks beaten down. Tired. Above, I proposed that Ody might just be blowing smoke to further get what he wants from her. I don't think there's quite enough insight for me to say I was necessarily right on that, but Ody doesn't actually appear that attached to her, certainly not enough so for me to confidently say that I think his "I love you" is genuine. He doesn't even look like he'll miss her, he looks beyond ready to go as she shouts, not pained by her tears. Honestly, Ody might've just said that so she'd stop talking so he could leave. Now there is one more saga left, so maybe he'll wistfully mention or remember her, but I'm not really expecting it based on the official visuals that Jay okay'd. Humbly, I'll say that I don't think Odysseus feels much for Calypso. We don't get happy moments of them together and not even a proper goodbye filled with mutual pain. We just get her backwards apology that basically says, "Sorry I hurt you, but not fully. Shut up and let me talk about me and justify why I trapped you. Wish you'd stop rejecting me despite the fact that I've hurt you. Let me shout that I hate that I fell for you—only because this hurt me unlike I wanted when I kidnapped you—who cares if it hurt you." This moment is not at all a redemption for Calypso. It's her downfall. Her negative character arc. She didn't want to be alone so bad she trapped a person against his will and now she is alone forever (in this show). She can't even have Ody as a friend (and she won't accept purely his friendship anyway based on how the song ends). Who knows how different things would've been if she had just been more... normal when he washed up on her isle? The situation was tragic for them both in different ways, but I'm not sorry for Calypso. Calypso is so interesting as a character. Side-lining her actions just bards us from being able to assess her.

[cheezeybread]

Anon McGee with an actual request this time [once again not pertaining to any actual game things, unfortunately, but I'm working on it LMAO. Twisting Wonderland will not be forgotten about, I prommy]

Starting to think about different kinds of mythologies and I've absolutely fallen in love with the idea of Selkies! And as a result, it only came naturally that the thought would come up of the Octavinelle trio with a reader who's a selkie!

For additional context on that if needed [both for yourself and for other people reading this], Selkies come from Celtic Folklore and are, watered down [haha], people who wear sealskins in order to turn into seals. Generally, I think they're described as being super kind and gentle, as opposed to other creatures of mythology you often hear of.

Thinking mostly of it being something that got them put in Octavinelle because it was assumed they'd fit in better there than anywhere else in NRC. Specifically I'm thinking of the reader being a Monk Seal Selkie because those seals tend to live in warmer, tropical climates and that fits in pretty well with Azul and the Tweel's species as well, making the Octa-Dorms a pretty comfortable place for something like that. I'm also thinking that this wasn't exactly something that the reader tried to keep hidden, but it also isn't exactly spoken of super often until the reader potentially loses the seal skin and it traps them to the confines of the land [which doesn't sound all that bad in THIS situation as long as it's quickly resolved, but many Selkie stories focus on the idea of losing the skin and as a result of that, their identity and freedom they had before].

Something something, it turns out someone took it or something, probably not even for malicious reasons, just because they were curious about it, or maybe they were snooping and accidentally got something on it and were trying to discreetly clean it and return it. Whatever works, really, reader is panicked, maybe gets to show off the seal a bit after the fact, something fun and chill like that.

Also, entirely unrelated to that, but I offer you my playlist of Ghost songs that is entirely curated to my tastes, but I feel like it's a good way to ease yourself into it more [most definitely not attempting to indoctrinate you]

https://open.spotify.com/playlist/2LWceY9cJfeLZOayhbuxbm?si=Px81gThlRQmFWHFRvQEQlg

AHHHH I LOVE SELKIES SO MUCH !!!! I remember first reading the stories about them and thinking "omg that would make for SUCH a good yandere plot- with someone who steals their coat so they can't go home, and then the stealer is all like 'lol sucks you can't leave now let's get married'", does that make any sense?? I dunno, I'm very tired right now!

And YIPPEE, I'm getting indoctrinated, I'd always hoped it would happen to me eventually! I'm gonna be listening to that playlist while writing this XD

◦•●◉✿✿◉●•◦

Octavinelle was known for being a generally quiet and calm dorm. Even the area in which the Mostro Lounge was is a fairly chill area, since there were very strict rules about fighting. The most that happened was an occasional yelp of terror as Floyd managed to corner one of his dorm members. Other than that, it was smooth sailing.

Except for today.

Almost everyone got woken up by a panicked, terrified screech.

It had ended almost as soon as it began, so most students chalked it up to be some sort of weird half-asleep dream- the others who believed it to be real sat up in their beds....before going right back to sleep of continuing on with their daily routine. After all, they didn't have to worry about anything dangerous happening with Azul and the Twins to safeguard the place.

And, speaking of the devils, the trio began their march through the halls, knocking and banging on every door to find the source of the mysterious sound.

When they got to your room, they found that although the door was unlocked, you never came to answer it.

"Maybe they're out in the bathrooms," suggested Floyd, already tired of this tedious task.

"Doubtful," remarked Jade under his breath "We checked there first, did we not? Surely we would have seen them heading to the bathrooms on our search, as well."

"Hush, you fools!" Azul hissed, leaning his head closer to the door, his eyes squinting as if that could help him hear better. "They're in here. I can hear them....crying, I think?"

"Oh, dear, well, if they're crying, we should allow them some time to-" Jade started, clamping his mouth shut as Floyd brought his leg up and kicked the door as hard as he could, flinging the piece of wood off of its hinges.

"KNOCK, KNOCK, SELKIE" He said with a proud grin, hands stuffed in his pockets casually.

"Dear Sevens, Floyd, I hope you know that's coming out of your paycheck," Azul looked disgusted as he viewed the once-beautiful white wood door splintered into two pieces, laying on the floor.

He focused his attention on the inside of your room, his body relaxing when he saw that there was no imminent danger, but then he winced when he saw you sitting on the floor in front of your closet, sobbing.

"Oops, didn't know you liked that door that much," Floyd said in an attempt to lighten the situation. You sniffled and tried to stop your crying, wiping your eyes as you looked up.

"Oh fu- geez, sorry, guys, I didn't think-" You stopped yourself, rubbing your eyes one last time before taking a shuddery breath "I'm sorry for screaming, I didn't mean- I didn't mean to...."

"Dear me, what's got you in such a sorry state?" Jade asked, placing a hand on his chin thoughtfully "We assumed the worst had happened. Octavinelle is not a place where one may use their outside voices, as you are well aware."

You glanced back into your closet again, the action making you want to start sobbing again "I lost it- no, someone took it....my coat."

"Coat's ain't that expensive, jus' get you another one, Selkie," Floyd shrugged, figuring the whole issue was solved.

Azul shook his head, going through the list of students in his mind's eye. He had made it a point to memorize the basic facts of all the members of his dorm, of course. It gave him the high ground in any situations, knowing of their weaknesses in academics, or background, or anything of the sort. He knew who YN was. "Wrong type of coat, Floyd. It's not one you can just purchase at Sam's store on campus."

"Ah, yes, they mean..." Jade made a motion with his hands to mimic putting on a coat, then swimming. It was a rather...silly pose to do, which made you chuckle a bit, despite the situation. Perhaps he had meant to do that.

"Exactly. Their coat. The one that allows them to change forms." Azul let out a small sigh, bordering on frustration "Sevens, I wish it were so easy for us, imagine not having to drink that awful bitter potion every day to retain legs....it could be just as easy as taking off a jacket, but no-" he cleared his throat, stopping himself "Apologies, YN. So I assume the missing 'coat' was your reason for such a disorderly cry not too long ago?"

You nodded your head shamefully "Yes...I know I shouldn't have screamed, but with all the stories I heard growing up of humans taking our coats so we lose that part of ourselves...maybe I overreacted."

"You did," agreed Azul, not bothering to sugarcoat it "It's ridiculous for you to assume the worst in such a situation, and as a result, bother the rest of your dorm members. Besides, if you would have bothered to read the memo I posted in the wall just outside of the bathrooms, you would have seen that today is the day that the school's ghost-workers come gather our clothes to be washed and pressed- paid for entirely out of my pocket, might I add, as a reward for the dorm's excellent exam grades." He pushed his glasses up, rolling his eyes "You would have also seen that I made a footnote stating that for any clothes you do not wish to be taken, to lay them out on the foot of your bed, lightly sprinkled with salt."

Floyd made a retching sound in the corner of your room. "Yech, salty clothes."

You felt a little better knowing that your coat wasn't stolen, but the embarrassment of being caught red-handed at ignoring the Housewarden's memo made your face turn red, itself. "...Oh."

"Oh is right!" Azul said loudly "Now pick yourself off the ground and compose yourself. I'll send Jade to retrieve your coat before the Ghosts start their washing. I would send Floyd, but..." glancing over at the Eel-mer, who was busy entertaining himself by seeing if he could fit underneath your bed, Azul let out an aggravated noise "I assume you wouldn't want him touching such a precious item."

"No, I- I wouldn't," You said "Thank you, Housewarden Ashengrotto."

"You can thank me by cleaning out the pool once you have your coat back- I assume that being in your natural form would help you better reach the hard-to-get crevices under the water," And there was his angle. So much for him helping you out of the kindness of his heart.

You tried to manage a grateful smile nonetheless "The indoor or outdoor pool?" you asked. There was a very clear difference between the two and which one you would prefer to clean. The indoor one was a basic pool, treated with natural products so that any of the water-lovers in the dorm or merfolk could enjoy a nice swim without getting chlorine in their eyes, The outdoor one was on the back-end of the dorm, and was made up of legitimate water. While the entrance to the Octavinelle's pocket dimension made it appear as if the guest was swimming underwater and yet could still breath, the back was as close to the real ocean as one could get. The larger mer-creatures enjoyed swimming there, as well as any homesick students (who could breath underwater, of course). It had magically-altered coral and reef spaces, tons of rocks, and lots and lots of crevices...

You felt the bottom of your stomach dropped when Azul flashed his iconic business smile

"The Outdoor one, of course," He stated.

----

This was a terrible job. It was so unrewarding to try and scrape off what barnacles there were sticking to rocks- mainly because the reef was entirely magicked up and the barnacles were consciously made a part of it! And also because, well, barnacles were natural in the ocean! Gahhhhh, curse you, Azul!

Although, now that you had time to think about it, maybe giving you such a meaningless task was Azul's plan to make you learn your lesson for making him go door-to-door searching for an emergency. That mean-spirited octopus...

"Ooooooh, Selkie's doing such a greeeeeat job!" A voice chirped from behind you. As you whirled around to see who it was, a phosphorescent light blinded you for a moment before you could see Floyd in his eel form.

Pushing down the prey instinct to run away, you forced yourself to turn around, continuing with your tasks. Floyd still lurked behind you, however, since the little lights on his body provided a faint glow.

"Can I help you with something?" You asked, your voice a mixture of grunts and barks in your current form.

Floyd had no trouble interpreting your words, and responded with chirps and clicks of his own eel tongue "Nope! Just bored!"

"Well, maybe you could help me out some."

"Hah! Not a chance, Selkie! Besides, everybody knows that those barnacles are spelled to grow back within ten minutes of being removed," Floyd grinned at you, swimming up and over you so that his head was in front of you, upside down, his sharp teeth flashing.

You frowned, looking back at the small section of barnacles you had just finished scraping.

They were all back in place. It looked like you hadn't even touched them.

You yelled out a few curses, throwing the blade in your hand onto the floor. It didn't feel as good as it did on land, though, since the water only made it gently float down.

"Sooooooo, you wanna ditch the boring scrapey-scraping and go for a swim?" the eel asked, mischief in his eyes already. Although, when did that look ever leave?

You pondered it for a moment before sighing. What else did you have to lose? This was a meaningless task anyway, like he said.

"Sure, why not?"

◦•●◉✿✿◉●•◦

[ghostfanwriter]

💖🧰 Dirty hands pt 3 🧰💖

Part one Part two

💖 Pairing: Dbf!Joel Miller x Virgin!Fem!Reader

🧰 Synopsis: Joel keeps finding reasons to stay in Lincoln. And you worry about the day he leaves, but he makes sure to show you how special this whole thing also is for him.

💖 Features: 🔞, fluffy and domestic Joel, Joel fixing things for her, masturbation (m and f), soft — so soft — (kinda dom) Joel, praise, pet names, quick cumplay (for poor Joel's desperation), sprinkles of angst here and there (I hurt my own feelings sometimes).

🧰 Word count: 9.5k. I'm so no sorry about this.

💖 About this: It took me forever to find this story, but I'm so, so glad it came out how it did. This series is gonna be a bit longer than I planned, but I have some real cool ideias for the next parts. Hope you're in with me ��️

🧰 Author's note: Life really got in the way of this series, besties, but I came out alive. I'm really happy so many of you are as engaged with this story as I am, I love them so much. I just want a domestic, fluffy, soft Joel for myself 😩🤧

Good reading, besties 🩷🫶🏻

'You're always up with the sun.'

Bill's sentence made Joel sleep with his curtains open that night. Even with all the reasons why his mind told him he shouldn't pursue you, even with the potential death trap he was jumping into.

He couldn't not think about you. He couldn't not want to be with you.

He couldn't treat you like he felt he needed to. Couldn't dismiss you or break your heart. He had to make this experience as good as he could for you. It was only fair.

He would feel horrible if you never wanted to meet anyone else ever again because an old man made you cry.

So even with all the reasons he had to just forget about your and leave Lincoln the next day, he chose to keep his curtains open instead. To let the sun wake him up, so he could see you first thing in the morning.

He remembered the day he arrived, when Bill was showing him his bedroom and he saw you hugging Frank on your bed. Your grumpy and sleepy face, your messy hair, your clothes.

It made him smile again, and this time he allowed himself to. He let the feeling that was blooming inside his chest to make its point, to show him that there was an option outside of the QZ. That maybe he could stay.

Could stay with you.

Sure, making Bill lower his guard shouldn't be easy. But he could work on that; show him that he didn't want anything wrong or inappropriate with you.

That he wanted to take care of you like you deserve. Care for you like you're his.

Have you as his.

As the sunlight filled his room, he woke up and washed his face, staring at his own reflection in the mirror, last night memories floating around his mind.

He could almost feel you again, your warmth against his chest, as your body contorted and you made such pretty sounds for him. Then your soft hands stroking him, curiously roaming over his stomach and chest, how good it felt to be so close to someone again.

Not that him and Tess had ever stoped to have sex. They still did it, but not as a way to share anything, not to feel anything. Rather as a way to dismiss the bad feelings they had. They just dumped all the negativity of their lives into one another.

With you he didn't want to release anything. He wanted to gather everything he could from you, to make you feel as good as he could, without thinking about what he'd get from it.

He wanted to know you were happy, satisfied, taken care of.

He shook the thoughts as he felt them placing roots all over his heart, knowing that when the day arrived and he had to leave Lincoln, you'd be the main pebble on his shoe.

Halfway down the stairs he could already smell breakfast being prepared. He had peeked in your room, and, having not found you, he knew you'd probably be the one in the kitchen.

And he was right. As he gets close to the door, he can hear you humming one of the songs you played on the piano the previous night.

The image of himself playing a guitar while you played the piano flashed in his mind again, making his eyes soften as he looks at you.

You're wearing yet another summer dress. One even prettier than the one from the day he arrived.

He swears you look prettier everyday.

You turn around, jumping when you see him watching you from the door frame.

"Oh — God." You gasp with a laugh, almost dropping the pan in your hand.

"Morning." He says, laughing.

"Morning... Joel." You say, your voice small. Suddenly, you can feel your cheeks warm up, and it feels like all the blood in your veins came to them.

You stare at him, remembering the night before. How he touched you — or how he made you touch yourself. How you touched him, how almost ethereal the whole experience felt.

Part of you was afraid to bring it up and learn it was all a dream.

All of you was embarrassed, awkwardly standing with a pan in your hand, staring at him, not knowing how to interact with him after the night before.

You take a sharp breath in when he rushes towards you, getting confused when he walks past you, turning around to find him quickly removing a pan out of the stove.

You put the pan in your hand down at the table and run to the one in his hand, your scrambled eggs burnt at the bottom.

"At least there's more texture to them now." He says with a laugh, and you look up at him, an embarrassed smile on your face. "Are you alright?" He asks.

"Yeah, I am. Just... Gonna have to switch pans now, and what's gonna be left of them isn't going to be enough for all of us, and this is gonna be horrible to wash, and—" Your rambling is cut by his soft and low whisper.

"Baby." He calls, and you look up, finding his eyes as soft as ever. "Not talking about the eggs." He says while staring into your eyes. "How are you feeling?"

"Oh, I'm... Good. Different, in a way. I mean, I don't know how to talk to you, or not make this super awkward." You mutter.

"It's not awkward. Are you... Okay with what happened, or—"

"No, no. I'm fine! It's not like that, no. I... I loved it. I just... I just don't know how to... I don't know it just feels weird." You stutter, feeling like you're embarrassing yourself.

"A good weird, then?" He laughs.

"Yes, a good weird." You agree. "What about you?"

"Long time since I've felt this good, baby. Was just worried about you."

"No, I'm good. No need to worry." You say shyly. "Well, expect my breakfast is ruined." You laugh, and he stares you for a second.

"Ever heard of Chef Boyardee?"

"No." You respond laughing.

"Well, he's gonna save your breakfast. Let me just grab it real quick." He says, putting the pan down and rushing upstairs.

...

He comes back after a minute, two cans in his hands.

"I was afraid Boyardee was your alter ego." You say, reading the name on the can.

"I'd never dare to compare." He says, bringing his hand to his chest in a fake humble gesture.

He opens the cans, and you two start cooking together. He insists to wash the burnt pan, as long as you watch chef Boyardee up close as it heats up in the stove while you make some orange juice.

Bill stops on his tracks when he sees you two in the kitchen. Cooking, making juice, brewing coffee, talking and laughing.

He smiles seeing how happy you are, seeing maybe he didn't made the wrong decision when he let Joel in his house.

"Our baby's growing up. Weird to think about that, right? It was never a thought before." Frank whispers from behind him, hugging him and snuggling his chin on Bill's shoulder.

"She is my baby. And it ain't Joel that's gonna change that." He replies, caressing Frank's forearm.

"She's not ours, Bill. Maybe the day's coming when we need to let her go, make her life." He says.

"Well, she can make her life inside these fences. Definitely not with Jo—" His rant cut by your short lived scream.

"It's not burning!" You defend yourself.

"Not the ravioli!" Joel fake cries, laughing as you desperately stir the ravioli in the pan, smoke coming out of the sauce, almost catching on your face.

Bill walks into the kitchen, his always heavy steps even heavier to announce his presence.

"What happened?" He asks, his eyes wide when he sees you close to the smoke.

"Oh, daddy... Joel's a disaster in the kitchen." You laugh.

"I was just washing the pan, you were supposed to watch the stove!" Joel defends himself, laughing, lifting the pan to show it to you. "If you didn't burn this one we wouldn't be going through all this right now."

You've never seen Joel laughing like this, and happiness looked good on him. You liked how his nose scrunched when he laughed and how tiny his eyes got.

He honestly couldn't remember the last time he allowed himself to goof around, make jokes and just have fun.

"It's your fault! I never want you in the kitchen with me again." You say.

"Oh, you're finishing this?" He mentions the pan in his hand.

"No no no, that was your fault. You clean it." You say, turning back to your dad. "Sorry, daddy. Good morning, are you okay?" You ask, going to Bill and wrapping him in a tight hug that he's eager to correspond.

"Morning, my love." He whispers on top of your head as he squeezes you, his hand holding the back of your head protectively. His suspicious stare watching Joel.

"We're having canned ravioli for breakfast?" Frank asks laughing, slightly grossed out.

"Chef Boyardee." Joel playfully corrects him.

"We were gonna have scrambled eggs, but Joel burned them." You say and Joel laughs in defeat, shooting you a playful look. "So yeah, canned ravioli. Promise I'll cook us something nicer for lunch." You say, hugging Frank and kissing his cheek. "Morning, dad."

...

Your dads sit across from one another. You're across from Joel, your right foot is between his feet and he's running his boots lazily up and down your ankles. You can't stop smiling because of it.

"So, Joel. I was thinking we could start with the east side and work towards the gates?" Bill asks, breaking the comfortable silence — only broken before to compliment Chef Boyardee — that was set while you all ate.

"Sure. Just have some other thing l have to work on before the fence, if that's okay? We're still gonna have plenty of sunlight when I'm done. Should be quick." He says while still chewing, stuffing back his mouth right after he's finished.

"What other thing?" Bill asks, not remembering asking Joel to fix anything else that day.

"She told me about these broken doors on her bathroom cabinet. Said they're loud and don't close properly." He says, looking at you, his feet moving higher on your calves, soothing you.

"Baby, didn't I tell you I'd fix your cabinet?" Bill asks, angry to imagine Joel inside your bathroom, even angrier to imagine you going after someone else for help.

"You did. But you never fixed it. So I asked Joel and he said it should be quick." You shrug, playing along with Joel, his legs caressing yours in a reassuring way.

You didn't even know Joel was gonna fix something in your bathroom, you never told him anything about your cabinets.

Bill grunts, and Frank tries to soothe him with a sympathetic look.

You were the most important thing he had, and he didn't like the idea of you not needing him anymore.

"So, love, your dad and I were wondering, what do you think of a bonfire?" Frank asks, trying to dismiss the topic, and you smile.

"A bonfire?" You ask excited, your gaze going from Frank to Bill, and you catch a glimpse of Joel's smile on your way.

"Well, I have some spare wood, and we're gathering a bunch of things we don't need with all the fixings we're doing." Bill explains, looking at Joel, who nods. "Your dad just wanted to call it a bonfire." Bill finishes, looking at Frank, a fake annoyance in his face while he smiles at his husband.

"And you loved my idea, didn't you, honey?" Frank asks, trying to win his case.

"Oh, it sounds so fun." You giggle, and you can feel Joel squeezing your calves softly.

"A bonfire!" Frank says triumphantly. Eating another spoonful of ravioli. "This is actually really good, Joel!"

"Told you." Joel said laughing.

As soon as you're done eating Frank offers to wash the dishes and you and Joel go upstairs, Bill watching you both with concerned eyes.

...

"When did you see the doors were broken?" You ask when he walks in your room with a chest of tools, following him into your bathroom.

"When, baby?" He asks with a laugh, raising one eyebrow. Like you didn't know he was in your bathroom the night before. Like you don't remember having him in your arms, hoping that one day he'd be yours.

"No, I know when. I just mean exactly when. I never told you about it." You say, sitting on top of your toilet to watch him work.

"When I was looking for a product to clean the sink. This door made a terrible sound." He explains.

You watch as he kneels on the floor and starts unscrewing the door, cleaning and oiling its parts before screwing them back together.

"So, how's life in the QZ?" You ask when he starts working.

"Not much about it, nothing you're missing out on, for sure."

"Then why are you still living there?" You ask and he looks up at you, the crease between his eyebrows and the way his eyes wander around showing you he doesn't have a clear answer for that question.

"Not that simple, baby." He scrunches his nose. "Told your dad, we've got things there that you don't have here. Things we — grunts — need."

You smile seeing his face contort as he has to use more force to unscrew a particularly rusty part. You notice his arms flexing under his denim shirt, how strong his hands look, making his tools seem small in them. How he grunts when he makes a final effort to remove the screw.

Your heartbeat speeds up before you can stop it, and you only notice that he's staring at you when you hear him chuckle.

"And do they just give you those things? My dads say they used to have to work to gain money, and they'd trade money for things they wanted." You ask, trying to dismiss the blood burning your cheeks.

"Wasn't Frank in a QZ for a long time?" He asks.

"He was. But he doesn't like talking about it. Says I don't need to know about it." You respond. Even though Frank was way more laid back than Bill, he also had his ways to guard you from things he thought he needed to. "But I want to know about it." You add, seeing Joel's reluctancy in keep telling you about it.

"We also work there, not for money, but it's still a trade system. We can get food, medicine, parts, clothes. Whatever we need."

"Do you have nice clothes there?" You ask with more excitement than you wished to. You know it's futile, but you sometimes wish you had different clothes to wear. He chuckles before answering.

"I mean..." He mentions himself, and you turn your head.

"I think you look good." You say honestly and he smiles.

"Your clothes are much prettier than the ones there, baby. You're not missing out."

"You like my clothes?" You ask, your voice small.

"Love them. Never saw no one dress like you since this whole thing started." He whispers, sitting back on his heels and watching you with adoring eyes.

You look out the bathroom door, your bedroom door closed. No noise outside.

You bend down, kissing him softly on the lips. His left hand caresses the nape of your neck as he deepens the kiss.

"Wanna help me choose my dress for the bonfire?" You suggest when you break the kiss.

"My honor." He whispers over your lips, giving them a peck and letting you go.

...

You come back inside the bathroom with two dresses, both on their hangers.

"Okay, so we'll go by elimination. What do you think of these?" You ask, holding each dress in a hand. He's kneeled on the floor, fixing the cabinet, but he turns his torso, carefully analyzing the dresses over his shoulder.

"Blue one." He says.

"Yeah. This one's a bit too summery, too sunny." You agree, and he raises his eyebrows, nodding and humming before turning back to the cabinet.

"And what kind of jobs you do there?" You ask Joel while going back to your closet, picking the next option.

"All kinds you don't wanna know about, trust me. There's nothing about that place that's worth knowing, nothing good except those walls." He says.

You come back with the winner dress and another option, sitting on your bathtub's edge.

"Well, not when you're in it. Then there's at least one good thing." You say low with a smile, poking him with your foot, and you can see the shy smile that flashes in his face as he quickly squeezes your calves.

"Tess and I we... Leave the QZ from time to time, which you're not supposed to do, to look for things we can trade for other things. Not always for nice things, but we can always trade them again for something better."

"You're smugglers." Frank says out thin air, startling you. "Which isn't bad, I mean, the best stuff I had at the QZ came from smugglers." He adds seeing Joel's worried expression. "Tess told me about it. Told me about the kind of things you two give to guards. Not anything we need here, but maybe you'd know where to find some things for us?" He asks.

"Yeah, sure. Depending on what it is, it shouldn't be hard to find." Joel says.

"Oh! We were talking about having more fruits, right, dad? Strawberries, watermelons. Think you could find some, Joel?"

"Would have to look around, but it's not impossible." He says, making a mental note of finding you those as soon as he has the chance.

The thought of leaving Lincoln to look for things you want plays in the back of his mind, the scenario making him smile softly while looking at you.

"Speaking of Tess..." Frank interrupts his daydreams. "...she's on the radio. Wants to talk to you, seems important. She asked you to bring a pen and paper with you." He finally says what he came in to say.

Joel looks at you, a deep crease between his eyebrows, despite his overall relaxed expression. If you're really starting to know him, the crease means he's worried.

He gets up with a muted grunt.

"Oh, Joel! Which one?" You ask before he leaves.

He looks back and forth between the dresses, pressing his lips, trying to picture you in both of them. He likes how tight on top the blue one looks like, how flowy it looks on the legs.

"Blue again." He answers with a smile. "Be right back." He says directly to you before turning around, walking out the bathroom and thanking your dad for calling him.

Frank sits by your side, carefully walking around Joel's tools.

"What do you think of the blue one?" You ask him, caressing the dress.

"Hm, thought you wouldn't want my opinion." He says almost bitterly, despite his playful smile.

"Why? You always help me choose my dresses." You say, furrowing your eyebrows, his expression softening.

Deep down he felt the same as Bill.

You always needed them, always looked for them for guidance, advice, help, comfort, love. It hurt to think of you not needing them anymore, of losing you.

"Nothing." He says quietly.

"Are you upset because I asked for Joel's opinion?" You ask, and he realizes just how silly the feeling is. You're just picking a dress.

"Well I... Argh, I am, love. Can't lie to you." He hugs your side, squeezing your head on his chest playfully. "You don't need my help anymore, you're not my baby anymore." He says dramatically, making you laugh.

"Oh, no! I don't love you anymore, dude. Let go of me!" You playfully say, acting like you're trying to get away from him but ultimately snuggling even closer to his chest.

"I love you. I'll always asks for your opinions on my dresses." You laugh.

"Well, to be fair. The blue one is the prettiest between those two." He admits. "How are things between the two of you?"

"Great. He's so nice." You say with a silly smile.

"Can tell you look happier. And so does he. Never seen him laugh like I saw this morning." He says.

You remember his face when he arrived. Serious and suspicious of everything about the town. How you only saw him smile three times that day; when you two met, when you said you were going to bed and when he saw you with Frank.

But as soon as you think about that day your chest tightens.

Tess.

She came with him. For some reason didn't stay. Was she looking for something while he was there, or did she return to the QZ? Was she coming over? She said she and Joel were just friends, but what if they weren't?

You whimper softly, your stomach hurting out of a sudden.

"You okay, love?" Frank asks, pulling away to look at your face.

"Yeah, just... Do you know what Tess wants with Joel?"

"She didn't say, love. Maybe she just wants to know why he didn't go back to the QZ yet."

"Wasn't he going to stay here for a while? To help you and dad?" You ask, confused.

"Well, yes. But she didn't know that. He was supposed to leave yesterday." He said, caressing your arm with his thumb. "But he kept finding reasons to stick around. New things that need fixing, the car's weird noise, now the whole fence. I wonder what — or who — made him want to stay." He squeezes your arm and you smile shyly.

"But why does she care?" You ask, an unexpected annoyance in your voice.

"Darling... Joel and Tess they... They used to be a couple." He says, careful, like he could see his words stabbing you. "She cares about him. She's worried, she doesn't know us, maybe something could've happened to him."

"Do you think he cares about her too?" You know it's a stupid question. Of course he does. It's Joel.

But it hurts to imagine him doing to her the same he did to you. Sharing the same.

Frank gives you a sympathetic look, his eyes softening and his lips falling open, like he's thinking of what to tell you.

"Do you think I'm silly, dad? Do you think he's just gonna leave and never come back?" You ask, thinking about what him and Tess must be talking about.

"I don't know, love. I heard him and dad talk about some of the houses in here." He sighs.

Should he even be telling you that?

'Is he thinking about staying?' You ask yourself, your puppy eyes making Frank kiss your forehead lovingly.

"Only he can tell you that, my dove."

Sometimes you think your dad can read your mind.

You think about what Joel told you.

'We've got things there that you don't have here.'

Could he ever not live in the QZ? Would he ever want that?

"But can I give you an advice?" He asks softly and you nod. You're taking any help you can. "Slow down a bit. Don't think too ahead, don't nourish any hopes or fears about what's gonna happen." He says, looking deeply into your eyes. "Joel has his life outside, you can't forget that. I really, really, my love, hope you don't come out hurt of all of this. And the only way for it not to happen is you being careful. Don't engage in feelings he hasn't displayed to you."

"Don't create expectations then?" You ask, trying to make sense of his words.

"Yes, sweetheart. Feel your feelings, but don't ever run over them. Don't expect what you want to happen to turn out exactly how you wish." He adds. "Like about him staying. Don't expect it but also don't suffer thinking it's impossible before he tells you exactly what he's thinking. Don't put yourself through unnecessary pain."

Before you can say anything else Joel walks back in, a mix of annoyance and worry contorting his face, that softens instantly as his eyes find you.

"Blue one?" He asks with a silly smile and you nod, an even sillier one in your face.

"Blue one."

...

It's hard to follow your dad's advice.

Because it hurts too much to think of not seeing him anymore.

And that's exactly what you do for the rest of the day.

You watch him fix the fences with your dads while you hurt your own feelings, thinking about him leaving, about him with Tess, about him doing to her what he did to you. What you only did with him.

It hurts to think maybe he doesn't care about you the same way you care about him. Because you can't stop thinking about him. You're more attached than you ever thought you'd be to anyone besides your parents.

It hurts to think about him leaving you...

...forgetting about you.

He noticed how quiet you were during dinner — it was quite hard not to. And he found strange just how much he missed you, even though you were right in front of him.

How you didn't make any silly jokes or laughed at the ones your dads made. How you didn't give him your leg when he reached for it under the table, like he did during breakfast. How you wouldn't catch his gaze when he looked at you.

He knew something was wrong, but he couldn't put his finger in exactly what happened.

After dinner you kissed your dads goodnight and went straight to bed, no piano, no songs, no anything, despite their protests.

Maybe something happened while he was fixing the fences with Bill. He hadn't seen you since he left your bathroom.

"Is something wrong with her?" He asks your dads as soon as you go upstairs. They both shrug, and Bill can't help but wonder... Why does he even care?

You brush your teeth and lie on your bed, throwing a pitty party for yourself, feeling silly for engaging in such unrealistic expectations.

Joel had his life in the QZ...

...with Tess.

He wouldn't just give everything up for you, to stay in Lincoln.

It's hard to follow what Frank told you, to not feel bad, to ignore the discomfort in your stomach everytime you thought about Joel.

You quiet your thoughts when he opens your bedroom door — that you never seem to lock anymore —, finding you laying on your bed, almost curled in a ball, your back facing the door. Trying to keep your eyes dry.

He walks in carefully to not startle you, going around the bed to see if you're awake.

Your eyes start watering as soon as you see him.

"Hey, baby." He says softly, squatting next to you, keeping his distance. "What happened?" He didn't need you to say you weren't okay, he already knew that. He just needed to know what got you like that.

You don't say anything, aware that any words you said would make you cry.

"Can I sit with you?" He whispers, still not touching you.

You nod, moving your hips back to give him room to sit. You knew that no matter how much you tried to stay away, you'd feel him pulling you close, like there's a magnetic field between you two.

He sits down in front of your stomach and you pull your thighs closer to his back, keeping him close to you.

He moves his hand slowly, giving you time to push him away, gently touching your hair, pulling it behind your ear.

"Do you wanna talk?" He asks, his voice softer than ever.

"Do you?"

"I want to do whatever you want, baby." He whispers, caressing your hair, almost making you sleepy.

"I want you to stay with me."

"I can stay until you fall asleep. But I can't sleep here with you." He responds.

Not the stay you were thinking about. But it works for now, and you're glad he didn't pick up on it.

"Can you lie with me?" You ask shyly.

You weren't mad at him. You were just afraid to get too attached — even more than you already were, and to suffer too much when he left.

But you can't deny yourself what you're craving.

"Anything you want, baby." He leans down to press a kiss on your temple, bringing his hand to your hips, squeezing you gently and turning you around, your back facing him.

"Is this okay?" He asks, laying down sideways behind you, staying away and not touching you.

"Uhum."

He supports himself on his elbow and strokes your hair gently.

"Are you cold?" He asks, touching your cold arm, and you nod. He sits up and grabs your blanket by the end of your bed, covering you with it and supporting himself back on his elbow.

He's far from you, and you scoot back closer to him, pulling the blanket that's pooling between you two over him.

"Wearing my shoes, baby." He says, afraid of getting your blanket dirty. He kicks his boots away and and moves his body closer to yours.

Dropping his head on the pillow behind you, he slides his left arm underneath your head, letting you use it as a pillow. He hugs you and curl his legs, curling yours along. Fully spooning you.

In a way it reminded you of when you were a child and your dads would let you sleep in between them during a thunderstorm. How the same feeling of calm and safety takes over you.

You do your best to snuggle into him and find comfort in the new position, eventually relaxing into his arms as his right hand comes underneath your face, cupping your left cheek, pillowing it. You snuggle your face on his hand, kissing his palm gently.

You indulge in the intimacy you two are sharing. In how warm you got because of him, how his calloused hand feels under your cheek, how your bodies seem to fit in perfectly within one another.

How you can subtly feel his heartbeat against your back, how you try to match your breathing with his, enjoying the way his chest raises and falls behind you. How his smell invades your nose, how his hot breath sends chills down your spine, how his strong arms hold you so tight.

You stay tangled for a while before you gather the courage to talk to him.

"Joel?" You ask gently and he hums in response. "Can I ask you something... about Tess?" You almost whisper, afraid of ruining everything.

"Sure, baby. What about her?" He responds, his thumb caressing the skin under your eye.

"Are you two dating?" You ask but regret instantly as you feel him chuckle behind you.

He gives your face a light squeeze before turning it for you to look at him. You feel vulnerable with him being so overpowering, moving you so effortlessly, his body engulfing yours so nicely...

"Is it because she called me earlier?" He asks, a smile on his face as he brings you back to reality. You only nod, not sustaining his gaze anymore. "Do you think I'd be here with you if we were together? Think I'd do this to her? To you? Lie to you like that?"

"I don't know." You whisper, hating how weak your voice sounds, barely making its way out of your mouth.

"Baby, Tess and I we... We were a couple, haven't been for a long while now." He explains, sincerity spread all over his face.

"Did you do to her what we did last night?" You ask, your stomach turning to imagine him doing that to someone else.

Realistically, you knew he had. But it still hurt to think about it.

"No, baby. Not what we did yesterday. That I never did to nobody." He answers and you look away from his soft eyes. "I'm not lying." He squeezes your cheek gently, making you look back at him. "Yesterday it was all about you, making you feel good. And sex with Tess was about releasing frustrations, sadness, anger. Distracting myself." He explains. "I'd never dump those negative feelings on you. I wanna make you feel good, wanna see and hear you feel good. I loved doing it, but it wasn't about me. It was all about you." He says softly, his eyes wandering from your eyes to your lips.

It feels like you're melting in his arms. His words disarming you entirely, making you want to feel him again. To share that again.

"Can you kiss me?" You ask, hope coating your request.

"Anything you want, angel." He whispers as he lowers himself, gently connecting his lips to yours.

The tingling of his beard on your face makes you lean in further onto him, pulling him lower on top of you as you lie back down.

You open your mouth, kissing his lower lip, making him deepen the kiss, rolling his tongue around yours, and gently grabbing a fistful of your hair.

His tongue tangling with yours make your insides burn with need, and your hips instinctively roll against his crotch, making you moan when you feel his still soft cock inside his pants. His hand comes from your hair to your waist, holding you still.

"Baby." His voice sound deep and aroused as he breaks the kiss, softly panting as he talks to you. "We don't have to do anything. We can go slow, slower than we're going. I'd love to just lie down with you tonight." He stares softly at you, his thumb caressing your belly.

"I want you, Joel. Want to feel you before you leave." You say, cursing at yourself when you realize what you've just said.

"Not going anywhere, baby." He promises, furrowing his brows before kissing you again, deeper and more passionately, making you moan into his mouth, his hand exploring your curves and your stomach, its roughness erupting chills on its tracks.

You can't stop your hand from reaching for him when he grabs one of your breasts, gently massaging it through your shirt. He pulls back when you touch his crotch.

"You first, angel." He says, removing your hand and kissing your neck. Then your shoulder, your collarbone. His hand softly pulls on the hem your shirt.

"Can I?" You respond by removing it, laying back down, your back still facing him, your hand reaching back for his hair, running your fingers through it.

His hand finds your breasts again, kneading them before he lifts himself behind you, sliding underneath your right arm to place ghostly kisses first around them, circling his way closer to your nipple, looking into your eyes for any reluctancy before he moves any further.

Not finding any and feeling how you pulled gently on his curls, he licks around your nipple once, still looking into your eyes. When you moan, he takes it in his mouth, humming at its softness. You whimper at how his beard scratches your skin.

The new and soft sensation of his tongue on you makes your clit burn between your legs, that you're pressing against one another, looking for some release for the almost painful need you're feeling.

He squeezes your hips, gently at first, but more and more firmly as you pull on his hair, his lips sucking tightly around your nipple, opening and closing around it, like he's trying to drink from it.

"More, Joel. Please." You whimper, your head spinning as you drown in simultaneous under and over stimulation.

"Want me to touch you, baby? Wanna feel my fingers on you?" He asks, letting go of your nipple, his voice breathy and raspy, and you whimper in response. "Would love to feel you, baby. Know you're so wet for me already. Wanna make you cum on my fingers." He says while tracing kisses from your breast to the back of your shoulder.

"Yes, please. Yes, Joel." You say eagerly, desperately almost. Making him laugh amusedly and spread your legs, pulling your right one over his hips. Slowly running his hand from your hip to your mount, the mere warmth of his hand making you grind against it.

"So desperate, baby. Gonna take my time, make you feel so good." He pants on your neck, lowering his hand even more, drawing soft circles around your clothed clit, earning weak whimpers and moans from you. "Let's take this off." He says, pulling on your pijama shorts, and you lift your hips to help him.

He pulls your leg back over his hips and caresses you through your panties for a bit, running his middle and index fingers up and down your folds, teasing at your entrance, softly pressing on it.

He palms your folds, gently squeezing your pussy. "So good, baby." He praises, his lips never leaving your neck. He runs his fingers of the elastic of your panties, playing with it. "Is this okay?" He asks, his fingers carefully sliding underneath them.

Your moan is enough of a green light.

His rough fingers make their way under your underwear, ghosting over your mount, then your folds. Finally finding the crease between them, gently touching your clit before spreading your folds, groaning when he feels how wet you are.

"Dripping already, baby. We haven't even started yet." He teases, nibbling at your ear and making you giggle. He laughs behind you. "Goddammit, baby, I..."

He stops himself with a grunt before he says too much, before he lets out something he's been pondering on, a feeling he's not managing to prune as it grows roots inside him.

He circles your clit again, just his middle finger rolling lazily over it. He uncovers it from the skin on top of it, making your whole core burn for him, the rough textured of his fingers on such a sensitive spot making you pull away with a whine.

"Sorry, baby. Too much?" He asks, kissing your shoulder, and you whimper in response, getting close to him again. "It's okay. We won't ever do anything that doesn't feel good."

He goes to your entrance and draws circles over it, slowly pushing the tip of his middle finger inside you.

"This okay?" Comes out in a whisper on your neck.

You love how he's always making sure you're enjoying what he's doing. Always checking in on you.

"More, Joel." You manage to put out.

"Okay, but just one, alright? We can work on two later." He says and you nod. You just need something from him.

He french kisses and bites on your shoulder while he pushes in, your walls engulfing him. You moan when his finger goes fully inside you.

It's so much bigger than yours.

He groans as he spreads his palm over your pussy, squeezing it quickly before gently thrusting his finger in and out of you.

"You feel so good, baby. So tight around my finger." His breath fans on your neck, and you have to swallow back a loud moan when he curls his finger, just like he taught you last time, hitting an even deeper spot than you managed to.

"Shh, real quiet, angel." His thumb finds your clit and he caresses it lazily, his finger moving slowly against your walls, your hips moving to try and ease the burn.

You feel his erection against your ass and your hand looks for him, grabbing him through his pants, earning a grunt, moaning when you feel how hard he is.

"Wanna feel you cum like this, can you try that for me, baby?" He asks while he fasten his movements, each thrust deeper and faster, each curl tighter and each circle around your clit more desperate. His hips bumping against your hand while you try to work him.

"Joel." You moan softly when your body starts contorting around him, your core burning as your hips move against his hand. "Please, let me do it." You plead, struggling to open his belt with just one hand.

"Fuck." He curses while he lets go of you, desperately opening his belt and freeing himself. He helps you remove your panties before carefully pulling you back in his arms, spooning you. His left arm underneath your head as his right arm pulls your leg over his hips again, his cock pressing against your ass, his hips grinding against you.

You stroke him slowly, spreading his precum all over his length, giving a special attention to his tip.

Just like he taught you. His grunts a sign you've learned just right.

His hands return their work, one on your pussy while the other alternates between caressing your hair and kneading your breasts, and you can feel his strong arm contracting underneath your face as he moves.

He notices your hand around him and your breathing both getting more erratic, an almost painful look in your face.

"Relax, cum for me, baby, let me feel you. I'm right here, I've got you, just let it come." He coos, and you twist your hand around him, making him thrust into it.

Being so close, so tangled, so vulnerable with him overtakes you, and your orgasm builds like a wave, slow and steady before crashing against your core, making you forget everything that wasn't Joel.

His smell, his warmth, his hot breath on your neck, his sounds, his rough fingers, his hardness.

You bite his arm that's under your head in an attempt to quiet yourself as he engulfs you with it, holding you tight and close to him, whispering praises and curses on your ear, thrusting slower and deeper into your hand.

"There we go. Feels so good around my finger, baby." He coos while you contort under his embrace.

He grunts as you probably squeeze his cock a bit too hard while you cum.

"Even prettier like this, my pretty girl." He praises as he pulls out of you, your arousal leaking all over your leg and butt.

"Making such a pretty mess for me, baby, look at this. You're gonna feel so good around me, angel." He thrusts into your hand again and shows you his finger, glistening and wrinkled from being inside you for so long, coated in your juices.

He sucks on it, furrowing his brows and humming at your taste, an amused smile on his face. His hips buck forward while he laughs, looking adoringly down at you.

"Taste so, so good, my baby, goddammit." He pants, and you wanna see him do it again, so you let go of him and gather some of your juices, bringing your fingers to his mouth.

He's quick to suck around them, rolling his tongue around your fingers and giving you a peck on the lips.

He thrusts forward again and his cock slides against your folds, making you both moan. "Hmm. Thank you, angel." He smiles on your lips, spraying kisses on your collarbone and your throat, his hips moving at a slow pace, savoring how you feel against his cock.

"So soft. So wet for me." He praises, hugging you, squeezing your waist and your breasts, moving his hips with more intent. Your belly clenching when his tip brushes against your sensitive clit.

"You like this, baby? Does it feel good? Feels real good to me." He breathes on your hair, his voice deep and raspy.

His right hand comes back underneath your face, and you snuggle against it, weakly bitting his palm and indulging on its texture against your skin.

It all feels amazing. The contrast between his rough, calloused hands and his soft, wet and warm cock rubbing against your pussy making you see stars. He feels so, so good.

"Feels so good, Joel." You moan.

"Close your legs real tight for me then, baby." He instructs and you do, pressing your thighs together, feeling his cock pulse between your legs. "There you go, good girl. Making me feel so good, baby." He says as he picks up his pace.

He fucks your folds for a while, grunting and moaning behind you as his cock opens it's way through them, spreading them and brushing his tip against your clit. The way his strong arms keep you close to him make you start rolling your hips instinctively against his cock.

He changes his pace to meet your hips, setting a passionate and deep rhythm, and you can hear the wet sound of your bodies pleasing one another when you move just slightly harder.

When you start to really enjoy yourself he suddenly stops, laying you on your back and climbing on top of you. He spreads your legs, making room for his broad frames between them.

He looks so big, so strong above you. You run your hands on his arms, frustrated that he's still fully clothed while you're so exposed for him.

Not that he makes you feel bad like this. No... It feels actually strangely good to be fully naked under a fully clothed Joel Miller.

He notices you mesmerized by him and just stand above you, kneeled between your legs, admiring your own exposed body.

To think that he did everything he's done to you without having to remove a single piece of his clothing is impressive.

But you need more, you want to see him, to feel his skin against yours. If feeling his hands and his mouth feels good, you know you're gonna be lost when you feel his bare chest and stomach burning your skin.

You undo the first button on his flannel, and he laughs.

"You look so sweet, so pretty, my baby." He praises, fixing your hair and leaning down to kiss first your cheek — right besides your nose, under your eye — , then another one on your lips. A sweet and lovingly kiss. You use the proximity to finish undoing his flannel, moaning frustrated when you notice the shirt underneath it.

You pull on it's hem, and thankfully he doesn't protest, just standing on his knees and letting you remove it.

You moan when you lie back down and look at him. He wonders if he's wrong when he sees the way you look at him.

As he got older and older people seemed to want to see his naked figure less and less. And to have you looking at him like that... Set a whole new branch of roots inside his heart.

You run your hands up his sides and his chest, and he closes his eyes at the feeling of your warm and soft hands. It's been a long, long time since he felt like this. You cup his cheeks and he lowers himself on top of you.

Having him on top of you is everything you hoped it'd be.

He's soft, warm and heavy.

So deliciously heavy.

You moan at the feeling and he holds himself higher, afraid to hurt you, but you pull him back, even lower, needing his weight to crush you.

You can't even breath properly, and you love it.

You wrap your arms around him, running your hands on his back and squeezing his shoulder blades. He does the same, his arms snaking underneath you, holding you like he was afraid you could ever think of going away from him.

If it was up to you, you'd never leave this bed again, this position, this man. Every kiss he places on your neck makes you roll your hips and squeeze him between your thighs.

He lifts himself a little and guides his cock between your folds again, spreading them apart and thrusting through them, pressing his cock against you with his thumb.

"Fuck." He pants as he slides his tip over your entrance. "Can't wait to be inside you, baby. Never gonna leave you again." He says, biting your jaw softly.

The promise makes its way to your heart, the thought of belonging to him, being with him, taking care of him and being taken care of consumes you, making you roll your hips on him.

"Please Joel. I'm ready, I want to." You plead, holding his arms.

He laughs.

"No, baby. You may be, but she's not. Look at this." He says as he presses his tip on your entrance, making you clench instinctively at the invasion and whine in pain. "You need to learn how to relax for me. Need to get used to being close to me like this. I need you to be sure about it." He says as he kisses your hand that's squeezing his shoulder.

"I am, I want you." You say, feeling as he slides the very tip of his tip inside you, grunting at how tight you feel around him. He thrusts slowly, just the tip going in and out of you.

And you have to give it to him... It feels like a lot. Even just his tip requires a considerable stretch, and the thought of having him almost carving your insides to make room for himself makes you clench around him.

"Shit — grunts — fuck, baby. See? She needs more time, I don't wanna hurt you." He says as he lowers himself to press a sweet kiss on your cheek, right besides your nose, pulling his tip out of you and sliding his cock through your folds again.

You moan when you feel his now much wetter tip brush against your clit.

He pulls your left leg up, bringing your knee close to your chest, caressing your thighs, not stoping his movements. You whimper as his weight sinks you down onto the mattress, and you wrap your arms around him, digging your nails on his shoulders, pulling away when he grunts from it.

"Sorry." You moan, afraid you've hurt him.

"No, baby. C'mon, squeeze me, it means you're liking it." He reassures you, thrusting slower and harder, pressing his hips deeper on top of you and bringing your other leg up.

"I wanna see it, Joel." You breath, holding firmly into his shoulders, your brows furrowed as you push him away, looking down where your bodies are connected.

"Yeah, baby? I love seeing it too. You look so pretty all spread for me like this, all ready and wet for me." He pants, touching his forehead to yours, looking down.

His hips get more erratic with every thrust, his hands supporting him up and squeezing you as he lowers himself on top of you again.

"Gonna make me cum, baby. But I wanna see you do it again, think you can do it for me?" He asks, his voice low.

"Yes." You moan, focusing on how good he feels rubbing against your core.

"There you are, such a good girl for me." He praises, kissing your neck, fastening his movements even more. "Gonna feel so good cumming under me, with my cock for the very first time, baby. Give it to me, c'mon." He says, moving your hair away from your face and cupping your cheeks.

The constant and relentless pace he sets along with his praises becomes too overwhelming, and you bite his shoulder to not scream when you cum, clenching and convulsing around air. Crying out in pleasure, droll dripping down his shoulder, tears running down your cheeks.

"Shh, it's okay, baby. I know it feels so good, doesn't it?" He coos.

His hand that was on your cheek now supports your head up against him, caressing your hair softly, soothing you.

"Goddammit, baby. Can feel you pulsing on me." He says, staring down, watching himself slide through your dripping folds.

You only moan in response, letting go of his shoulder and kissing the deep mark your teeth left on it.

"Gonna cum for you, baby. You did so well for me, such a good — grunts — fucking girl. My... All mine." He stutters, not being able to form comprehensive sentences anymore. "Can't do it like this, no. Fucking can't." He pants before dropping to your side, stroking himself deep and fast.

You watch his strong torso as it raises and falls heavily, curses and senseless words falling from his lips.

But when he calls you... By your name, a breathy and passionate moan... You can't help it.

You reach for him, wrapping your hand around him.

"Fuck, just like last time, baby." He instructs before running his fingers through your hair and caressing your cheek with his thumb. "Such a pretty girl. I'm so fucking — grunts — lucky, angel."

His praise makes you fasten your movements, twisting your wrist around him and rolling your hand around his tip.

"Joel?" You call and he groans in response, looking at you. "Can I put it in my mouth this time?" You ask, using that goddamn voice to try and convince him.

"Jesus — no, baby. No mouth." He pants, fighting the words as they leave his mouth.

God, he loves how much you want to suck his cock. He fucking loves it.

You tighten your grip when you feel him pulse, craving more of the sensation.

"Shit — fuck. Like that, baby. Gonna make me cum for you."

When you feel him twitch and you see the first stream of cum spurt out his his tip...

...you forget everything he told you. You notice his eyes closed shut and lower yourself, opening your mouth in front of his tip, drawing a circle around his tip with your tongue.

He doesn't taste as bad as you remembered.

His hips immediately buck into your face, a gutural sound leaving his throat.

"I said no — grunts — fucking mouth, baby. Goddammit." He says, his hips thrusting up, his hand fisting your hair, but not pulling you away.

You keep licking around his tip while he cums, leaking into your mouth and your hand. You don't keep anything in your mouth, letting it all fall down on your hand and his crotch.

You look up at him and find his eyes on you. Instead of feeling shy, though, you smile, sucking around his tip for the first time, and he spurts one last time inside your mouth with a grunt.

"Fuck, baby. Felt so fucking good." He says when you feel him start softening in your hand. He fixes your hair lazily while you lick your lips, drinking what was dripping down your chin. "Doesn't taste gross anymore?" He teases, seeing how focused you are in drinking every drop of him that's on your face.

"Tastes better directly from you." You lie, only taking it into your mouth because you like how he looks at you when you do so, holding back a bitter expression when you taste more and more of his cum.

Although you have to admit... It does taste better than last time.

"Come up here, angel." He calls, pulling you on top of his chest. "You okay?" He asks while looking deep into your eyes.

You nod. Okay is nothing compared to how you feel right now.

You feel like you're floating, like you're in a transe, like jelly.

You kiss his chest, snuggling your face on him.

"Are you feeling better?" He whispers on top of your head, his hot breath on your hair.

"I feel so good, Joel."

"You do? And you're not gonna thank me, baby? I thought you had better manners than that." He teases, laughing softly underneath you, your body going up and down along with his chest.

"Thank you, Joel. Thank you too." You lightly tap his softening cock.

He laughs. There's the sillyness he missed during dinner.

The playfulness he knows he'll miss the most when he leaves you.

If he ever manages to leave you.

"Our honor, baby." He squeezes you tighter and kisses your forehead. You wrap your arms around him, feeling sleepy already.

When he feels you soften on top of him and your breathing get softer, he softly scratches your head.

"Hey, baby. Can't sleep like this. Gotta clean you up." He whispers, rolling you on the bed, on your back, and kissing your pout with a smile before going to your bathroom.

You admire his naked figure. His strong back, his broad — so broad — shoulders, his strong legs. He looks like a sculpture, like a God, almost.

And you'd be lying if you said you couldn't describe what you feel for him as almost devotion.

Your blasphemies are cut when he walks back in, already clean, with a cloth in hands. He climbs on top of the bed and spread your legs, caressing your thighs.

"So pretty." He praises when he cleans you, softly to not hurt you. Laughing when the cloth touches your clit and your body jerks up.

He finishes and kisses your belly, right above your mount, going lower and pressing a kiss on your folds.

"Joel." You moan.

"Sorry, baby. Don't wanna make a mess again." He teases you, lifting himself.

"Can you do it? Put your mouth on her?" You ask, a new spark of arousal hitting you at the thought of his warm mouth on you.

"Can't wait to, baby. But not today. No. Now the only thing you're gonna do is sleep." He puts his pants and his shirt back on before grabbing your panties and your shirt.

He dresses you back up and lie down behind you, spooning you again, his right hand coming underneath your cheek, pillowing it.

You moan at how good it feels to be so close to him. At how vulnerable you can be with him, knowing he won't move one finger unless you're okay with it.

You fall asleep faster than any other night since he arrived, only waking up for a slip second when you feel him carefully letting go of you. And you feel colder, but you know he can't sleep with you.

He presses a kiss to your temple, whispering something muffled before leaving your bedroom.

...

When he lies on his bed he seals his fate. He can't stay way from you. He doesn't want to.

The whisper on your cheeks more a confession to himself than to you.

"I think I love you."

It reverberates in his chest, a feeling he thought could never bloom again in his infertile heart. A feeling only you could sow on him.

Please, please let me know what you think about it. I love reading your thoughts, reblogs, asks and comments on this series 🩷

Hope you liked it, have a wonderful day, besties 🩷🫶🏻

My Masterlist 🩷🪷

Been a long while since part two, so I'm tagging some people that seemed to really like this series so far 🫶🏻

@pedritoferg @cleopatra99 @samsamsantos @thecaptainpandabear @blooodmoonbarnes @yourwinchesterbros @walkintheprk @cruelfvkingsummer @laiisleitte

[catcze]

Reblogs are greatly appreciated !!

「 FEAT : 」 Dainsleif x GN! reader

「 ### : 」 fluff ♡

「 CWS : 」 ambiguous relationship/fwb-to-lovers, soft Dainsleif, potentially ooc Dain, fluff.

Reposted from my secondary blog !!

You greet him with a crooked smile, splayed out on your back in the grass, so at ease even when the black-swathed figure stands above you, standing like a sore thumb amongst the crisp grass and gold sunlight.

“I wondered where you had gone,” Dainsleif says, an unsung question in his voice. He cocks his head, letting his eyes roam over you— a habit, at this point. The tree you’ve chosen to rest under casts shifting shadows on your face, a dappling of light peaking through the leaves. Your eyes are hazy, still freshly awoken by the sound of his footsteps, but the curve of your lips is always endearing to him, a secret he’s played close to his chest. 

“Were you worried?” You ask. The amusement drips from your voice like syrup, your smile shifting into something more awake. With a lazy hand, you wave in the direction of your home, some ways away, half-hidden in the trees and almost hidden by the vines and flora. 

It looks smaller than it is from over here, Dainsleif thinks. Cozy and quaint and oh-so-unassuming. Your home. His sanctuary. (You always snorted when he says something dramatic like that. “It’s your home too, Dain,” you’d correct him so easily. He never could come up with a response. He’s not sure what the appropriate response could even be. )

“It’s not that far,” you reason, and before he can say something else, perhaps about the ever-looming threat of the abyss order, you pat the spot beside you, inviting him to sit in the warm mid-morning air with an easy, “C’mere.”

Dainsleif takes the invitation, of course— as if he’d ever entertain the thought of saying otherwise.

The trunk of the tree is solid against his back when he leans, legs stretching out beside your head, where you jokingly scowl at him for not truly laying with you on the grass (your words, not his.) 

It is a feeling that settles over him easily the longer he lays in the space with you: Peace. Stillness. Longing.

His eyes flick to you at that last one, watching as you breathe in the crisp air of the forest, and the way there’s some bits and piece of grass stuck in your hair. Absently, one of his hands comes to tangle in it, moving in slow motions as he cards through it soothingly. Only to remove the blade of grass, of course.

As you continue to half-doze in the mid-morning sun, he wonders how much longer you’ll allow yourself to play this song and dance with him. How much longer he’ll let himself dance around the truth, too scared of both his past and his future to face the present.

Dainsleif watches you, peaceful, at ease, in the presence of a man so cursed as him, and wonders if he is worthy for anything more than this. Wonders what it is you see in him to have come this far, to have been so patient already. To have let the thing between you two go undressed for so long.

His hand drifts to your face, habitual in how gentle his touch is. Why, he wonders, have you let him fall for you so?

One of your hands comes up to meet his, guiding his hand so his knuckles meet your lips in a soft kiss. “You’re thinking so loudly,” you complain with a huff, and all Dainsleif can do is chuckle.

“Is that so?” He asks, twining your fingers together and letting them rest on your shoulder. “My apologies, I wasn’t aware you could read minds.”

He feels rather than sees you roll your eyes, and you sit up, still keeping your hands connected. There’s a scolding expression on your face, but he’s been around you long enough already to see how you fight back a grin. “First you disturb my rest —twice!— and now you mock me. Honestly, Dain, how rude.” But before he can defend himself, you’re already soldiering on, and the air around you changes. To something a bit more serious, a bit more concerned. When your gaze meets his, he’s silenced by the cocktail of sympathy and understanding in it. Underneath the quips and the jokes born from familiarity, there is something genuine. “Well? No use beating around the bush. What’s wrong?”

“I…” Dainsleif pauses, his mind going blank when he tries of think of how to put it. You’ve caught him off-guard. He struggles to find words for a moment too long, his tongue suddenly drying in his mouth. There’s too much to say, really. Too much that could go wrong, too much that could go right. He doesn’t even know where to start.

He squeezes your hand slightly, his insides twisting in a way he can only describe as nervous. How preposterous. Him, the bough keeper, hesitating because he doesn’t know what to do with his feelings. And yet there’s no other way to see the situation.

“Dain,” You cut into the fog in his brain with a low chuckle, thumb rising to smooth out the furrow in his brow. You smile at him, and he can practically feel his shoulders sag. “Relax. Just say whatever’s on your mind.”

You watch and wait for a few more seconds as Dain almost internally argues with himself. The back-and-forth between his heart and his mind is clear as day to you, watching as he frustrates over whatever it is that conflicts him. You have to fight back a smile. Whatever’s got Dain this torn, it’s sure to be something. He squeezes your hand absently —almost instinctively— and you squeeze back every time.

After some time, the silence breaks as Dainsleif releases a long, deep breath. His hand tightens around yours, as if scared you might pull away. But for all the nervous ticks and tells you’ve learned to spot from him over time, his voice is resolute when he speaks. Unwavering in the truth that he’s finally come to accept aloud. 

“I’m in love with you,” he says, gaze meeting yours. “But I’m scared that admitting it will ruin what we have now.”

The silence stretches out for what feels like an eon after that, and Dainsleif can almost feel his throat constrict in nervousness, fearing that the very thing he dreaded was coming to pass. You say nothing, merely watching him and breathing. For as much as Dainsleif fears that these next few moments with you so close to him will be his last, he keeps his head raised and not backing down from your stare. Your eyes don’t stray from his, peering deeply, searching for… something that you hope to find in him.

Dainsleif can almost feel his cool exterior crack underneath your heavy examination. Can almost feel the way his heart wants to break free from his chest, or the way his blood battles with being boiling hot or freezing cold. So nervous, with a heart beating so fast. Never had he thought that he’d feel the rush of adrenalin and bravery that comes with confessing your love to a person in his long, long life.

So gently that he doesn’t feel it at first, your hands come to cup his face, gently prying out of the hold with his own.

“Do you mean that, Dain?” You ask, a smile taking root. It both settles his nerves and sends his heart racing. You’re so close— he can feel your breath on his lips, and warmth rushes to his face unbidden.

“All other truths I’ve spoken pale in comparison,” he says, eyes flicking down to your lips. So close. He had tasted them before, yes, but that was before his heart had been laid out on the table for you to pick and prod at. Now, he wonders, will your kiss be even better?

The answer, Dainsleif finds, is a definite yes.

When you lean in to kiss him, it is something soft. More tame than some of your other kisses by far, but the difference is that this has sparks racing up his spine, and heat blooming where your hands touch his face. He hums into the kiss, a sound that comes instinctively after waiting so long to finally kiss you like this— to kiss you as the man who loves you with every fiber of his being. Your lips are warm against his, making his heart stutter and dazing his brain with just a touch. 

“So dramatic,” you say when you two part, only just a bit breathless. There’s a curve to your lips that you can’t tamp down, and Dainsleif is certain that he has a matching smile of his own. You laugh, taking your hands from him and wrapping them around his shoulders instead, burying your face in his neck. “Man, I’ve been waiting for you to say that forever, you know?”

Dainsleif coughs, an embarrassed flush rising to his face. “My apologies for dragging it out so long, then.”

He feels the huff of your laugh against his skin. Feels the soft, tender kiss you gift him with. “You can make it up to me.”

One of his hands come up to the middle of your back, holding you closer to him as he leans back. Even through his gloves, his touch is warm. Without the indecision to haunt him, his shoulders relax without the weight of a burden. There is peace here, with you, under the tree with the fallen leaves and the grass and the dandelions. Where he can hold your form against him, and bask in your presence like how a cat basks in the afternoon sun. Dainsleif smiles, pressing a kiss to your hair with such tenderness that your heart nearly melts. 

“For as long as I live,” he promises, holding you close.

[rinskazuu]

genshin men as songs in my playlist

aether, albebo, al-haitham, itto, cyno, diluc, kazuha, kaeya, ayato, heizou, childe, thoma, tighnari, scaramouche, xiao, and zhongli

these are written romantically, but if you want to view them as platonic, you can try.

cw: angst w no comfort, fluff, varies depending on character and song i chose. some of these are written in first person, some in x reader form, you can view them however you like!

a/n: initially, i was going for songs fitting their personality, but i accidentally made kaeya and childe's angsty, so i remade them. also, this took so long, for absolutely no reason.

AETHER- hold on by flor

throughout the journey aether's been on in teyvat, all he does is help nations, people, archons, you name it. but i want to be his escape, someone he can hold and be comfortable with. for a moment, i want him to worry less about what's going on outside, and just close his eyes. he's so selfless, and i believe he deserves the same treatment in return.

♡

ALBEDO- something about you by eyedress

you’re just so mesmerizing and beautiful to albedo, that he can’t help but feel subjected to paint you. you’re always catching his breath, from the way your eyes glint when you’re talking about your interests, to the way your body sways when he accidentally catches you dancing in your room, while he’d been busy with his experiments. he just cannot keep his eyes off you.

♡

AL-HAITHAM- out of time by the weeknd

al-haitham would most definitely let his pride get in the way of your relationship. he’d also prioritize his dying love for knowledge over you. the moment you leave him, and he finds his closet half empty, he’s drowning in guilt. he’s reaching for you, but you’ve moved on, and now it’s too late for him to hold you again.

♡

ARATAKI ITTO- always forever by cults

itto is the type of man to boast about you to everyone, having never said anything negative about you. he’s the type of man to snuggle you, and tell you every night how grateful he is, and how happy you make him. he’s going to tell you, that from here on out, you’re stuck with him, and that you’re two peas in a pod.

♡

CYNO- the one that got away by katy perry

cyno isn’t as much of a tsundere as the fandom writes him out to be, so this doesn’t sound fitting. but i feel like his role as the general mahamatra would definitely play a bad part in your relationship. he’d be too busy to take you on a date, or too tired to accompany you to an event. it’s not until you’ve left, that he’s realized he’s neglected you for too long.

♡

DILUC- be kind by halsey

with diluc, i imagine wanting to take his burdens off his shoulders, and comfort him, reassure him. i want him to rely on me, and be comfortable enough to come to me to talk. it makes me sad, how isolated he is, or rather, how he felt the need to isolate himself.

♡

KAEDAHARA KAZUHA- old love by yuji & putri dahlia

not only does the melody suit kazuha, but so do the lyrics. there's not a lot that kazuha holds dear, simply because he wanders a lot. he moves from place to place, and you're one of the only stable aspects of his life. he will always return home, to see you.

♡

KAEYA- midnight rain by taylor swift

i feel like kaeya would suit taylor’s perspective in the song. you wanting to settle down, but kaeya can’t love you for too long, because he's holding a major secret that is threatening yours and potentially teyvat's safety. you’re the sunshine, and he’s the midnight rain. he’ll have to leave you soon, but for now, he’ll let you hold him.

♡

KAMISATO AYATO- still with you by jungkook

ayato is not only head of the kamisato clan, but he’s a commissioner too. he’s used to running things mostly by himself, because he had to take care of his little sister alone, and rebuild the kamisato clan from the floor. he’s often isolated, completing work, but at the end of each day, i want to remind him, that we are in fact together, and any challenges he faces, are mine to struggle with too.

♡

SHIKANOIN HEIZOU- enchanted by taylor swift

heizou is a man who can easily sweep you off your feet, with his charm, pretty smile, and his skills as a detective. he can read your feelings and the type of person you are. he knows exactly what to do to reel you in. your love is enchanting, so unique, and will last for an entire lifetime, if not more.

♡

TARTAGLIA- save your tears by the weeknd & ariana grande

i know we kind of ignore how unhinged childe is, but i want to acknowledge it. he doesn’t know how to love or be loved, which leads to him not knowing how to comfort you. he’s going to hurt you, mentally/verbally, often. he’s going to tell you to stop crying, instead of holding you, or call you dramatic, instead of snuggling you in bed and encouraging you.

♡

THOMA- i wanna be yours by arctic monkeys

thoma is often busy, since he works for a commissioner, and one of the most well known and respected clans in inazuma. he sees you a lot, whether it's running errands, or accompanying one of the kamisatos somewhere. he's in love with you, and he'd do anything for you. but for now, he needs to focus on his duties.

♡

TIGHNARI- sweet by cigarettes after sex

even though he's a busy man, tighnari still makes plenty of time for you. he's sweet and smooth with his swords, easily swaying you. he makes it known, to not just you, that he loves you to the ends of the world. he knows how to make you swoon, from taking days off to pick flowers for you, to having deep talks with you in the shower. he's always thinking about you, even picturing your smile while he's off gathering gifts for you.

♡

WANDERER- space song by beach house

after regaining his memories, and even after his redemption arc, scara will still have major trust issues. wanting to there for him isn't a crime. but because of his trauma, he's going to keep pulling away from you, and pushing you farther from him. no matter, you're not going to give up, and you want him to feel loved and comforted.

♡

XIAO- be there for you by nct dream

xiao is one of the most obvious characters with a traumatic backstory, and i believe i want to be there for him the most. it's not going to be easy, since he's lived 1000+ years. he's used to being on his own, and all he knows is how to protect, and kill. but for once, i want him to rely on me, and for him to breathe a sigh of relief.

♡

ZHONGLI- wildest dreams by taylor swift

as an archon, zhongli has been alive for over 6000 years. even though he's given up the title, and is now living a normal life, he will always remain an immortal. eventually, you will pass on, and zhongli will be alone again. regardless, he's going to spend every waking moment with you, until your very last breath. he will cherish your love for the rest of eternity, even if you're not physically there.

i do want to add, i have so many taylor swift, the weeknd & chase atlantic songs, but didn’t think the last 2 would be as fitting as taylor’s. i have 150 songs & this does not define my entire playlist, there are so many genres. i just happened to make them romantic/angsty..

[superscd]

plots i want based off some taylor swift songs

because i'm t-swift obsessed and adore the lore that potentially ties so many songs together, i've decided to make a list of much needed plots that have been brewing in my head over the last few releases of new albums and vault songs! note: i'm not at all saying these specific songs are tied together. i'm saying that i love the way she connects her songs, so i'm simply connecting some of my favorite ones that i think work for plot ideas!

slut! and i can fix him ( no really, i can ) ; muse a is a beloved public figure with a good reputation to match, while muse b may be adored, is a notoriously bad influence with a not so great public life. despite all the red flags and backlash from each other's fan base, muse a thinks they can 'fix' muse b and turn their life around. eventually, muse b's public antics, scandal after scandal, and cyclone becomes too much. muse a has to decide if being called a slut! will be worth it for once and they can fix them, or whoa... no really they can't.

question...? and is it over now? ; back in their very early twenties, muse a and b were going from one kiss to getting married. though it was rushed, reckless and not always the healthiest, they really loved one another. but while finding who they are in life, they lost one another, something neither saw coming. muse a moves away from their small town, muse b sticks around, remains a common name in a tiny place and builds a life with their now spouse. years later, muse a comes back into town for whatever reason, and what's that? you're still with them? that's nice, i'm sure that's what's suitable and right... but tonight... can i ask you a question...? is it really over now?

imgonnagetyouback and cowboy like me ; strangers who can both recognize a kindred spirit, that's what muse a and muse b start out as. and ever since, it's been a cat and mouse game. they both hustle for a good life, in some way or another. as a result, both have a lot of trouble with settling down and allowing themselves to love. over the years of knowing one another, they've had their brief moments together and encounters, there's always been attraction and desire, they've crossed the line once or twice, and the last time they saw one another, things didn't end the best. but now life has brought them together again and they see each other at an airport bar... so pick your poison babe, they're poison either way.

maroon and chloe or sam or sophia or marcus ; muse a and muse b always wanted different things out of life, but they tried so hard to make it work. after dating for years, sharing the same group of friends and making a life in the big city, muse a and b realize they aren't on the same page anymore and things end in heartbreak. given their same circle of friends however, it becomes normal for them stumble into their life with someone named chloe or sam or sophia or marcus and they just... watch it happen, always wondering. some time passes, muse a gets sent to work in another city temporarily, while muse b is back in new york working on their gallery. the night of the opening, muse a happens to be in town, shows up and sees that they're one of the inspirations behind the exhibit. because that's a real fuckin' legacy to leave.

getaway car and fresh out the slammer ; it was the great escape, the prison break. muse a and b were partners in actual crime and lovers until muse a got caught and took the fall, while muse b ran and hid. now muse a is fresh out the slammer and running back to their old life, finding that muse b is still on the run themselves. they hit the road together, rekindle their romance and face the challenges of staying ahead of the law. navigating through a series of motels, backroads and small towns, muse a and b eventually have no choice but to confront their trust issues, the feeling of betrayal, heartbreak and more. will they screw it up this time now that they know what's at stake?

so it goes... and guilty as sin? ; muse a, notorious playboy, is a member of an exclusive lifestyle club known for it's discretion, while muse b is about as inexperienced as it could get. their paths cross unexpectedly and muse a finds themselves hooked, wanting to write mine on their upper thigh, while muse b is curious but scared. in full agreement, muse b introduces muse a to the club they are apart of, embarking on a very passionate, but primarily physical situationship, at least for muse a. what muse b doesn't realize, however, is that muse a isn't known for their long-term commitments, but muse b is already in a gold cage, hostage to their feelings. soon their situationship begins to crumble as muse a begins to wonder if they're anything more than a plaything.

[highpriestess13]

November Forecast!

Honestly, I feel very good and optimistic for you guys for the month of November. October probably wasn't the best but I'm also getting the energy of "turn of events". Not sure if this is resonating more with the month of October or November, whichever one I just feel like there's going to many turn of events for you guys, whether it's positive or negative or a little mix of both, I guess it all depends on how you at it... it's all about perspective. For instance, a negative situation being the catalyst of some type of turn of event for the better.

I'm going to reiterate staying focus on your goals and plans at this time and not getting easily involved or swayed by distractions. Church bells are definitely significant. The song "Beautiful People" by Chris Brown is significant. Again, distractions... take your time with things especially with yourself and innerstand that only YOU innerstand what's going on and happening for YOU. Yes, you will have naysayers or people that just want to add their little 2 cents into shit... pay them no attention, keep doing what you're doing! "You're doing fine!" someone needed to hear that!

At the end of everything, you'll be very satisfied with the decisions you've made or had to make but remember it was to better you in the long term. I see most of you reaching your goals, others of you however are needing to get out of the swamp... not sure what that means but swamp was what spirit used lol. But it is kind of giving me dirty, mucky water type of vibes... it's kind of creepy looking honestly lmao. Many of you will have your moments where you'll feel betrayed or like you had to betray others in some way in order for you to have this come up and glow up but honestly it is what it is. 555 is significant and I feel this goes back to what I mentioned before how certain turn events will happen but it could be either for the negative or positive. Some of you had to "abandon ship" in order to move forward in your own personal life and honestly that's fine, I also want to add that mistakes will happen and are bound to happen but be graceful and patient with yourself. Yes, you may have had potentials in your life, whether they were friends, romantic partners, jobs, etc. but things had to go the way they did in order for you to grow and heal the things that was happening in your inner world. What's meant for you will always find you and what's not, will leave you.

It's time for bigger, better and more! No more mediocracy from yourself and others and I mean this in multiple ways! I mean this in a stop giving and receiving mediocracy. You want better? Do better, create better, give better, receive better. When it comes to YOU, stop the mediocracy nonsense and I mean it in a way of stop settling for less than. You deserve more because you're a princess or prince. I used princess because your inner child is needing some attention and healing right now. Someone also could've been a daddy's little girl or a mama's boy. Achievements are on the horizon for a lot of you moving forward. You could be signing something soon or you may be seeing a lot of signs especially keys, moving trucks/vans... and something about church or a specific church building or this may be the church bells that I mentioned earlier. Confidence is key moving forward... I was getting something about marking your territory in some way lmao idk don't shoot the messenger lmao. 33/11/333 are significant. Lastly, you had to learn some really hard and tough lessons but this was to prepare you for what was to come in the near future. Trust me when I say that everything happens for a reason, and some of you may have needed to be or become more disciplined with self. I hope this helps!

**Please keep in mind that these messages are collective messages meaning they may or may not resonate with you and your current situation. If you would like a more personal one on one reading, my prices, cash app, paypal and readings I provide are all pinned on my website. I'm also offering mini readings for $5! PLEASE MESSAGE ME BEFORE SENDING IN ANY PAYMENT! If you're unable to use Paypal/ cash app, I have readings available on my website which is in my bio use code: Grand333 to get the discounted prices.**

[1dhq]

Re Louis' festival set-list choices... It’s a bit of a shame people can’t take a step back and see things more from his perspective. Moving into the festival space is a big deal for him and very much out of his comfort zone. He tells us over and over again about how he takes so much of his energy from the crowds at his shows, how much confidence they give him, about how he feels the love and support, and how if the audience has a good time, then he has a good time. So the mixed audiences at these festivals are a completely different environment for him.

He also talks about how he gets anxious, even before walking out on stage for one of his own shows where he knows that the audience is there just for him. It stands to reason then that those worries are significantly multiplied when he’s about to perform in front of a festival crowd. While there was a great show of support from his fans at Pinkpop - and likely will be at many other festivals over the summer - it’s not the same as the guarantee he has for his tour shows. In his own words at Pinkpop - “As I said before, I’ve not done this a lot, right? So, truthfully, I was fucking shitting it before I came out here.”

His chats between songs, which are such a big part of his tour shows, have to be different for the festivals as well. It’s not the same audience makeup, and the heartfelt, open, and thankful nature of those speeches won’t necessarily resonate with the festival crowds in the same way. 

In the same vein, his setlist needed to adjust. Louis has built a solid and dedicated fanbase, and while we might know all of his songs by heart, that’s obviously not the same with the festival crowds. As much as he’s been able to maintain and build his fanbase, it’s been done without his music achieving radio play, TikTok trends, or other viral social media events to broaden his exposure. Walls and FITF didn’t really have any tracks that received wide recognition, perhaps aside from Two Of Us, which doesn’t fit his current genre of music. His biggest songs have been BTY and JHO, and while he’s found a permanent place for the BTY rock version, something is holding him back from consistently performing JHO, even though he did perform it at Tecate Pa’l Norte and we’ve seen it on the set list a few times recently, he’s clearly nervous for some reason and skipped it at Pinkpop.

It’s interesting that ‘7’ has found what appears to be a permanent place on his shortened festival set list as he performed it at Tecate too, and while it was probably a toss-up between 505 and 7, it's doubtful that Chemical would have been in contention. It hasn’t really resonated with his own fans at the tour shows in the same way 505 or 7 have, and it's doesn't seem like he's really been completely comfortable performing it.

The Tecate set list also included Bigger Than Me and to be honest, it's not a surprise that it didn’t make it to Pinkpop. It’s always been a challenge for him to deliver vocally, and on average, he’s dropped it from his tour shows as much as he’s performed it.

The other songs from tour that he’s leaving out make sense when looking at the overall vibe and energy he’s going for. He also doesn’t have the same amount of time across the shortened set list to achieve the ebbs and flows as he does with a 20 song set. HOTH is lovely, but slower, and it’s the same with Angels Fly, Lucky Again, and COACOA, which are all used to ease off the pace before ramping up to rockier songs or leading in/out of his chats. Chicago is a great song, but also slower, and fans love it partly because of the audience participation aspect, which likely wouldn’t translate to a mixed audience of fans/festival goers. The Mega Mix is a challenging one. While it could potentially be great at festivals, it’s more of a nighttime song, and less rock and more dance in terms of genre, so it wouldn’t necessarily fit as well as other tracks. Then there’s Saturdays, which is soft and lovely, but runs long at 6 mins. Perhaps if it had one less verse at the beginning before the crescendo, then it could work, but it might step up too slowly to be successful when the majority of the crowd aren’t going to be familiar with it

The 1D covers from Pinkpop are the same as those from Tecate - DMD, Night Changes, and WDBHG - and are obviously his go-to 1D songs that he’s familiar with and confident in his ability to perform them. DMD is also short at around 3.20 and fits well into the set list after KMM with the arrangement that they use. Night Changes is one of the more well known 1D songs, and he seems to really enjoy performing it, which is the same with WDBHG. 

The challenge of needing to balance things out between his solo songs and the covers is a difficult one. On the one hand, it’s great to perform his solo songs and for more people to get to hear them and potentially become new fans. On the other hand, the set list needs to appeal to those who perhaps have never heard his solo music and might be more likely to have heard the 1D songs, and at least they’re getting to hear Louis’ rockier versions.

Anyway, this is all just my opinion, of course. Do I wish he was performing more of his solo music and less covers? Sure, but I also get why he’s constructed the set list this way. It makes sense and he’s comfortable with it, and at the end of the day, he’ll be out there performing his solo music to hundreds of thousands of people over the summer, so that’s all upside in my book!

well said, i agree with most of this! except maybe the bigger than me point you’re making, i would argue he‘s dropped in when necessary for his vocal health, not because it’s generally too challenging. but that’s just me! overall great comparison between that other festival set and the pinkpop one!

[britishassistant]

The collectivel group of Yuus (an Exasperation of Yuus?) have been put through the wringer lately, might I suggest pranks at the expense of villainous embarrassment?

(Corvid Prompts is a writing prompt blog that has a lot of Hero/Villain/Vigilante story ideas. Many of which encourage writers to break out of a typical plot for such genres. I got this idea from them.)

Since they all work under the same League, what petty pranks would the villainous groups pull on each other for the hell of it?

Who would send a goat (or other farm animal) to another hide out to as a reminder to an unfortunate (but funny) goat related incident that happened in the past?

Another incident where during another League thing out of town/country where a pair (from different groups) had to pretend to be married to get out of a mess? What jokes are made for the lack of "wedding" and subsequent "divorce"?

Who fills the entire lair of a villain with plastic balls as disproportionate retribution for taking the last muffin?

You don't need to write anything, but just imagine the insanity? Can you imagine Yuu in any form just exasperated?

Thank you for the ask, dear anon!

Well, Poison Queen’s already pulled the “prank” of attempted love potioning, though that did backfire rather spectacularly on him. Epel would like to say he’s good at pulling them, but Vil’s usually easily able to avoid them. He’s had much more luck with the other rookie minions though!

Rook pulls a prank every time he says he’ll fight White Neige.

Royal Flush would never be caught dead indulging in something as puerile as a prank!… But if he makes the appropriate suggestions to his minions and just so happens to leave plans for them around? Well. He can hardly control everything they do, now can he?

Ace and Deuce are the best at following those and tag teaming to ensure they work, while Trey and Cater specialize in innovating to cover any potential pitfalls. Ace also pulls pranks on Deuce and the rest of Heartslabyul regularly, but woe betide him when his seniors decide that he’s had enough fun, and team up with Deuce for some payback.

Leona loves stealing whatever he can get his hands on from his rival supervillains. If they have it, he wants it, for no other reason than ruining their day when they realize it’s missing. Unsurprisingly, “whatever he can get his hands on” usually ends up being “Yuu the Reporter”.

Ruggie has a very similar mindset, in that he’ll only pull a prank if there’s something physical he gets out of it in return. Usually food.

Jack will not mastermind pranks, because he is a Good Boi. Doesn’t mean he won’t join in on one someone else has thought up.

Azul considers himself too professional to “pull a prank” as the kids say, but he will gladly point Jade and Floyd at his inconveniences dear colleagues and watch the sparks fly.

Floyd has an abiding fondness for large quantities of anything small, plastic, and loud. Jade prefers noxious, brightly colored substances that are a pain to wash out of clothing or architecture.

Kalim is the master of accidental pranks! He genuinely doesn’t mean to get people soaking wet or make their food too spicy or tea too sweet! But if everyone is laughing, he’ll laugh with them!

Jamil doesn’t do pranks. Jamil does retaliation.

One of the small joys of Idia’s life is getting one over on these Luddite normies. If he just wants a quick pick me up, a virus that constantly plays an annoying song on loop or hides files is always a fun way to spend the day. If he’s feeling vindictive, mass ordering insects or livestock to be sent to their lairs is an old favorite.

Ortho will also gleefully participate in his Nii-san’s pranks!! They’re so fun!! However, if Idia hasn’t gotten enough nutrients or fresh air recently, Ortho’s not above pulling a prank or two of his own…

Malleus once tried to prank a NRC conference by balancing a bucket of water on the doorframe. He had no way of knowing that Yuu was going to be sneaking in to eavesdrop and would end up getting drenched.

Lilia isn’t allowed to prank anyone anymore. Not when his pranks verge on the level of psychological warfare.

It’s very, very rare, but Silver occasionally pulls pranks by falling asleep somewhere inconspicuous and summoning inconvenient wildlife to his location. No one ever suspects he can do it on purpose.

Sebek has tried to pull pranks before. He gets too impatient and always accidentally spoils it before the payoff.

Jade and Trey have had to fake getting engaged at least once in order to avoid getting found out as minions during a Fae Incorporated(TM) sponsored gala.

Trey has also had to pretend he was married to Rook in order to maintain cover at another, completely separate event.

Jade and Rook like to tease poor Trey about his “infidelity”. Floyd once tried to beat up Trey for his brother’s honor.

Trey still isn’t quite sure whether he was serious or not.

[cruesuffix]

What I'm wondering is how the crüe would react to Mick like, blowing up on them. Like he's had a particularly shitty day and everyone is running around and screaming and breaking shit and he finally snaps at them.

this has so much potential to be angsty as hell and…you know me, i love angst. ofc i have zero angst credentials but seeing as though im headcanon girl, i’ll try my hand at it!

i’ll call this one: mick mars’ thirteenth reason

- let’s say his day starts off on the wrong foot. maybe he has a headache, maybe it’s a bad AS flare up. perhaps he spilt coffee on himself. or he’s just incredibly tired. he’s just having a tough time and all he wants to do is get to the studio, record his parts and go back home.

- maybe it gets worse as soon as he leaves the house; someone cuts him off in traffic, he almost gets into an accident, the roads are busy and it’s taking him an awfully long time to get to the studio. everything that could go wrong does and he’s at his wits end. by the time he gets to the studio he’s stewing in his anger. still, he tries to just take a deep breath and chill out.

- he walks in and notices literally everyone’s in the studio. for some reason vince is there, and he usually never stays behind to watch the rest of them do their tracks. it doesn’t bother him. he can only nod in acknowledgment, not bothering to say a word. then…it starts. nikki is already hounding him about some song. even though they’ve already rehearsed the song like a thousand times, nikki now wants to change a certain riff. he pushes down any retort he wants to make, simply gritting his teeth and nodding. tommy’s being his loud self. it’s annoying, but not even for mick to say anything about it. that’s just the way he is, there’s nothing he can do.

- maybe the boiling point happens from certain factors; the producer wants vince to redo vocals for a song because it apparently wasn’t his best work, so now he has to wait just to start on his guitar tracks. maybe the headache he had earlier that morning comes back as he has to listen to vince sing the same line over and over again. when he finally does start his tracks, nikki gets particularly annoying about his playing. then, maybe tommys starts getting too loud. maybe they all start talking at him, and he’s so overstimulated by the multiple voices talking at him that he just snaps.

- adding this in last minute, but even more interesting: what if it was backstage before a show?? everyone’s so loud in anticipation of another great gig and for some reason micks nerves are shot and he’s not drunk enough to handle everyone partying and being obnoxious, breaking shit, yelling…you know the usual crue activities (at least if we’re talking 80’s era crue). maybe he yells at everyone to shut the fuck up and then for the next few minutes they have left before they get onstage, everyone’s just silent. you can hear a pin drop…and then it’s time to hit the stage. would be interesting if everyone can feel the tension even while they’re onstage. how this would be resolved is up to you because i literally just though about this two seconds before posting it and i don’t have a resolution to this idea yet!

-anyways, back to the show!

- now…mick is a calm person. the band has never even heard him raise his voice! sure, he’s lectured them a dozen times (which always falls on deaf ears)…but he’s never shouted at them, let alone yelled at them. but he is now, though. he almost blacks out in pure rage, he doesn’t necessarily remember what he even says to the guys, he’s sure he probably yelled at them to shut the fck up that’s for sure!

- the band…is speechless. mouths almost hanging open. they don’t even know what to say. they just watch as mick finishes yelling at them and angrily plugs in his guitar and starts working on his tracks. they’d all be so scared, if mick gets stuck on a riff or a chord and lets out even the slightest sigh, they all hold their breath and step back.

- nikki would be absolutely taken aback. if anyone knows about micks temper, it’s him. he’s the one that’s constantly fighting with his old man about everything (he didn’t call him and mick the odd couple in the dirt for nothing!). still, nothing can brace him for the most epic of blow ups mick just displayed. he almost wants to leave the room and just let the others deal with it, that’s how scared he is.

- which says nothing about how scared tommy would be. this bitch would almost shit himself…literally his heart drops right down to his stomach. he’s the lucky bastard that’s never had to face the wrath of his guitarist…like ever. he’d be fidgeting around while mick yelled, trying not to make a single noise. he doesn’t even look up the entire time, he doesn’t want to see just how angry the old man is.

- oh and vince would eat that shit up!! like pretty sure vince has made a reference to mick being a pushover before (possibly in his book iirc), so he’s entirely sure something like this would never happen…and then when it does he has to stop himself from smiling. he’s almost proud that micks finally standing up for himself, even if his anger is directed towards him.

- like i can’t emphasize enough just how terrifying an angry mick would be. he’s not usually as truly frustrated and miserable as many ppl paint him to be. he’s usually just so chill and calm. yes, he has his days where he’s in just terrible pain, but he still tries not to snap at people because he knows it’s not their fault. whenever it gets bad he just tries to stay in the background and not say anything. he’s just not usually a guy that yells, or starts fights.

- but when he does snap…it’s terrifying. everything about him just goes cold, his eyes get icy, his posture is almost even more rigid than it already is. he no longer cares about feelings or being polite either, he’s going to give it to you straight, and if he hurts your feelings…well that’s on you. he’s just a dude you don’t want to make angry.

- the rest of the band kind of back away and let him cool off. they’re much more quiet now, and if anyone starts getting loud (like if someone walks into the booth and asks a question) they all shush them and point at mick (in a “dude…watch out” sort of way).

- maybe…if we need some fluff in here; once mick is done recording the tracks and is in a much more calm mood, they all gingerly creep towards him. i think mick would end up being embarrassed for losing his cool like that, especially when he sees how nervous his kids are around him now. he kind of halfheartedly apologizes and mentions about how unprofessional that was

- to his surprise i think the band would tell him they needed that, you know, just another lesson not to fuck with mick.

also…i remember seeing someone on here talk about a scenario of gen swine era mick getting fed up with the way he was being treated in the studio and just kind of breaking down…I’d kinda like to add on to that (btw if anyone remembers who it was, or if it was one of my moots and i can’t remember who i hope you don’t think im stealing the idea or anything i swear i just can’t stop thinking about mick breaking down and straight yelling and crying)

- as we know, mick was going through it during the gen swine recording sessions. nikki and tommy weren’t helping things by standing by their producers side as they pretty much belittled him and questioned his skills. the resentment between them definitely built up over the days.

- still, he doesn’t say anything. he’s entirely avoidant of conflict, and would rather just put up with the constant criticism than stand up for himself. vince has just rejoined the band and has his own shit to deal with so he’s not going to stand up for mick either, and the last thing mick wants to do is go vent to vince….thats what he has corabi for!

- the last straw for mick would be finding out corabi has been re-recording his guitar parts the entire time. he found out when he called into the studio to get confirmation on something. when he finds out he calls corabi who has to nervously tell him the whole truth. im not entirely sure if he would blow up on him as well, but they’d definitely have a short and extremely tense conversation on the phone before he hangs up and calls for an impromptu band meeting.

- even then, he’s trying to stay calm. all he wants is for someone to just tell him the truth. of course, nikki lies and pretends he has no clue what corabi is talking about and “of course we never replaced you, that’s all you on this album come on, don’t be ridiculous!” and it’s so infuriating, mick has no clue why they’re all lying to him when he knows they hated the way he was playing the entire time!

- finally he has enough and yells at all of them to “shut the fuck up!!” everyone immediately stops and watches as he starts to rant about it all. how they’ve treated him, how he knows corabi isn’t lying and that they need to be honest with him or he’s walking. he can feel just a surge a rage flow through him and he can’t stop himself. a pit opens up in his stomach and he can’t stop himself. he wouldn’t have even realized he was crying if he hadn’t seen their disturbed faces. they’re all looking at him like he just grew two heads and he has no clue why. it makes him feel worse and he ends up shouting “why are you looking at me like that?!”

- nikki jumps and just kind of points to his eyes. mick can only look at him in confused anger, then tommys pushing a box of tissues towards him.

- “you’re…uhhh you’re crying.” he whispers. mick almost scoffs cause…no he’s not. then, he wipes his face and finds his cheeks are wet…he’s actually crying. he’s crying. why the fuck was he crying?? none of the guys are getting close to him, they’re all just kind of looking at each other like “dude is he actually crying right now?”

- if you want even more angst, the band probably wouldn’t be able to comfort the older man. they’d probably just stand and stare until he pulled himself together. maybe they’d call for another band meeting to discuss the very weak threat of quitting the band that mick had made…or maybe they’d try to pretend none of this happened and go back to recording or whatever it was they were doing.

- if you need fluff though…maybe someone finally apologizes to mick (you can pick whoever it is) and maybe they very awkwardly pat his shoulder and make a joke about “finally seeing the emotionless bastard cry!”

- i just think the band wouldn’t be able to comprehend mick having any more emotions other than his stock standard “cold indifference” and the moment he starts showing his ability to rage and scream and cry, they’d all piss themselves. either that or awkwardly shuffle away and leave the room to just stare at each other in shock and go “wtf just happened?!”

and here we are! woooo i need to work on my angst that’s for sure, but still i kinda like this premise! That’s probably why this took so long but yeah…need my mans to just let those tears pent up from decades of pain, terrible treatment and frustration out…preferably in front of three losers to make them feel bad! (i say this, meanwhile the only time i cry is when im about to get my period LMAOOO sorry peepaw you can suck up those tears if thats what you want!) ANYWAYS,,, i hope you enjoy these!! sorry for replying so late…that’s how long it takes for me to write apparently lmaoo!

(also sorry if this is all over the place, im editing this a bit now and I had another idea I had to squeeze in…i bolded it so you’d know it wasn’t apart of the headcanon i shoved it into randomly…sorry about that!)

[aayakashii]

Ok, part 1 of title ideas!!!

Kiss me in the dark tonight

- Fake-dating au where MC has been paraded all around by Leo or Jin to keep the crazy suitors away from him. They do the fake dating really really well, and MC is so kind and pretty and considerate of his boundaries both while acting and in private (always looking out for Leo’s signs of overstimulation from his hearing or Jin’s signs that his exhaustion aren’t getting too bad, interfering whenever they look uncomfy, etc) and she does little acts of PDA that aren’t gross enough to cross the line of what a non-partner would do but hold so much love that it leaves them breathless (holding or caressing their face with so much joy and softness that it feels like a punch in the gut). Eventually they are forced to kiss for prying eyes, but it becomes too much and later, he drags MC away and asks for her to be willing to “kiss me in the dark too please. Not just when eyes are on us, not just to appease everyone else. Please, I just want one time where I taste your love because it is for me and not for anyone else”

Oh take this veil from off my eyes

- Omg this makes me think of Luca lifting the veil in the prologue so we are rolling with it. A snapshots of all the times that Luca was entranced/fell a little bit in love with MC. Of course, that first time is when he sees her for the first time. Then maybe when she goes to protect the kids despite not having any chance of fighting off the anomaly and being scared herself (she’s so caring and brave). Maybe she offers insights to demons, usually with a caveat that she knows he probably already has the information but couldn’t help collecting it for him anyways (maybe sneak in the “everyone’s stigma phrase is an anagram for a demon from Solomon” thing). The last moment is a full-circle where he accidentally gets some sort of fabric hanging over his head, and she lifts it for him, laughing a bit, and he just goes “oh. oh.”

There will be darkness again

- For some reason this is really reminding me for the I Fight Dragons song “Always” where it goes “I can't promise you there won't be pain, I can't promise to remain the same, But when you're scared, I’ll be there, tonight and always”.

- Mayhaps Lyca being scared about the full moon affecting him again, and being scared of hurting MC again, or her leaving him. And her saying “I can’t promise that there will always be light, or that I’ll never get hurt or leave, especially not with my curse. But I can promise that I love you, even when time are dark”

- There’s also Ed but I’m iffy on his character so I don’t have a lot for him.

Objects in the mirror are closer than they appear

- Sho, of course. Maybe Bonnie really likes the MC/reader and is constantly seeking her out. “I swear I was looking where I was going this time, so how did I almost get run over by you again?” “Must not have actually been looking” *Bonnie has favorites and went off course to see you but Sho refuses to say that because he knows that Bonnie only favors you because he favors you*

- Rui looking back at being able to touch people, thinking that time is so far behind him, only for his curse to be cured.

Cross my heart and hope to die

- Jiro (or Yuri, but I LOVE Jiro so I have to pick him) realizing that he doesn’t really want to continue whatever half-life that he is living if you are no longer there. He will find a cure for you, cross his heart and hope to die, because he refuses to live without the one person who still makes life worth living by his side. He already feels a sense of unnamable grief at times, he will not add to that, even when he can’t remember what he lost before.

- Zenji relationship where MC decides that she’d rather die and potentially join his side as a ghost than turn into an anomaly.

👻

FROTHING AT THE MOUTH AT ALL THESE IDEAS

1- I already had thought about a fake dating plot with Jin so THIS IS ACTUALLY PERFECT 👁👁 that little blurb you added here almost killed OH THE ANGST POTENTIAL BEFORE THE REAL KISS (I like making those boys suffer)

2- You know, one reason I always hesitated on writing about Luca is because in his case I feel like his story would be a slooooooowwww burrrrnnnnnn but this made me realize I can kinda make it like bullet points? Like enumerating each instance in which he felt something different for mc, instead of making one long scenario 🤔 I really need to play with other forms of storytelling and this would be great ngl

3- There will be darkness again comes from a Hozier song!!! I said it doesn't really have to match the song vibe, but reassuring Lyca actually matches it tbh :o the song is like about persistance in the face of problems and how he would support his beloved in a time of trouble (in my interpretation ofc). Like "even with all these awful things going on, the world will still keep going and you'll stay living, so let's do the best we can". Btw I am having a hard time thinking abt stuff for Ed too, because that last obscuary chapter made me so iffy abt him 💀 I need him to redeem himself sldhjsnzhdhs

4- OKAY I actually have an idea for this one bur now I'll add your Bonnie idea to it!!! My idea is a BIT nsfw but it's about Reader and Sho having some sort of friends with benefits agreement, but after a while reader wants actual commitment, but Sho doesn't; which causes them to avoid Sho for a while. During this time away from MC, he realizes he feels jealous whenever he sees them with someone else and it takes him some time to realize that maybe he does want them to be official after all. The relation to the title is that his feelings were bigger than he expected, much like the mirror situation 🫡 AND I'LL ADD BONNIE BEING A MATCHMAKER NOW

5- I love this because he actually kinda shows this feeling in his 25 intimacy home screen dialogue 😭 he says something like "I dont know why but I need to save you, I have to at any cost" ;-; jiro is one of the trickiest characters for me to write about without going to yandere territory, but it'd be an interesting challenge tbh

6- I HAD AN IDEA LIKE THIS A LONG TIME AGO!!!!! and never elaborated!!! Do you think this one would be on zenji's pov or mc's pov? I am leaning on zenji's pov because I think making mc die willingly and write her thoughts abt it would be a bit too heavy of a topic for me to tackle 😭

[jewishbarbies]

Forgive me but I have so much I can say about this that it physically hurts that her fans believe this nonsense…

“she has always been on the frontlines of change in the industry and setting trends”

When?

“she literally changed the demographic of country music from just being for/about older women to teen girls”

There were female artists before that those “older women” listened to when they were teens. When Taylor’s fans are older women there will be a new singer that teens listen to. It’s how the music industry and freaking aging works. 

“she was one of the first people to really centralize social media in marketing”

She’s literally not. The singers that came up in the early 2000s are. They think 2006 is when the internet was being utilised for promoting singers because of Taylor. Google was invented in 1998. Social media & the internet was being used for almost a decade before. JLO is the reason google images was created for goodness sake.  

“she left RCA because she felt that even if they gave her a good deal they would diminish other writers on the label.”

Do they really think she’s the only so singer to leave or stand up to their label. Britney Spears stole her upcoming song from her label and released it to a radio station in 2004/05. 

“she unabashedly writes about her feelings as a young girl and a woman despite getting shit for it at every turn.”

Most female artists who came before her have struggled with this. Dolly Parton would win awards and get up on stage and not be allowed to speak because her MALE partner spoke for her. Even though Dolly was doing all the work. 

“she's one of the first artists to successfully transfer genres from country to pop.”

This is just false. It happens all the time. Not to mention it happens with different genres and artists all the time. 

“she stood up against streaming when literally no other artist did, got them to change some of their policies”

Because she’s the only one that is selfish enough to publicly pick a fight with someone and pretend it’s got nothing to do with her own bank account. Even when I was a fan of hers I knew she was doing it for herself. 

“yet now the exact thing she was worried about has happened.”

Because she was greedy and arrogant and didn’t buy the masters when they were offered to her because she thinks she better than everyone. 

“her move into pop music was completely different than the type of pop that was being made at the time and it influenced pop for years to come.”

Am I deaf? She stuck to the pop model created by those before her to make sure she was successful. Madonna, Janet Jackson, Britney Spears, Billie Eilish they all took risks with their music and careers to push the envelope and change the sound of pop. Not Taylor “stick to the formula” Swift. 

“all before the me too movement.”

The act TS did herself was admirable but this sentence. This belief that this Swiftie (and potentially other Swifties too) have is a slap in the face to what this movement initially represented and what it meant for women who had endured this. 

“her rerecording process is the first of its kind to be this successful and others are now following suit.”

Wtf does this sentence even mean. They don’t know sh*t about her recording process especially in comparison to other artist. Are they seriously so deluded to think no artist was successful before Taylor. How can they compare her to anyone if they believe this. This statement alone makes it sound like she is the reason music is successful. 

“the way she publicized her fight to own her masters”

Yes for public sympathy cause she’s a narcissist. 

“she also basically started the crop top set trend of the mid 2010s”

One quick google search and this is what I found. “Although the crop top first gained prominence in the fashion industry during the 1930s and 1940s - the latter in particular due to fabric rationing in World War II” I’m sure if I spent more time researching I could find more. But I also know it became very popular in the 1970s with men and carried in through to the 80s and 90s for men and women. Then the 2000s was when the trend reignited. 

“heavily influenced the twee fashion of early 2010s”

This is not the compliment they think it is. This fashion trend is layered with the issues. Her racist fans probably love it because it’s a style that is deemed acceptable by those Hampton holidaying rich white mothers and fathers that got sent to boarding school in England when they were young (I hope that analogy makes sense). It was also equated to thinness particularly at the time it was popularised. Not to mention you google Twee and the pictures you see are if Jess from New Girl, Blair Waldorf from Gossip Girl (a character from a 2000s show) and Alexa Chung. 

Also such a bizarre way to end their long winded rant. 

They are all so blatantly ignorant and stupid. I wasn’t going to say stupid but it really is all it is at this point. They are stuck in this cult they can’t even make reasonable arguments anymore. It’s exhausting constantly being bombarded with them all in every facet of life. I see so many videos of Swifties singing her music in public settings like that video of them on the plane, if I was on that plane I’d have jumped out of it, and it’s just infuriating the lack of respect they have for the rest of the world. Yet they expect everyone to respect and worship their cult leader. It’s disgusting and exhausting. 

Sorry this was so long. I don’t have many followers and I know you’re a safe space for people who don’t like her. And I feel like this is something others might agree with. 

[mage-ical-character-person]

Would it be like… okay? If I… watched Hazbin Hotel… maybe sorta had a good time even though it wasn’t that well executed? and all the characters look like cut Hat in Time character Moonjumper. Except with less reason for looking like that.

Missed potential in things makes my brain go brrr bc it almost makes me think more than stuff that’s genuinely near-perfect. Like when I watch Wander Over Yonder I’m like having the best time ever but the show is perfect so my thoughts on it are just oooooough!! Good show good show!! Eating it!! Oh the helper seeks to help because he knows what it is to be helpless!!! Everything feels well thought out!! Commander Peepers!! Animation good!! Craig McCracken makes good cartoon!! Catchy song!! Lord Dominator cool woman!! But like I have nothing to add. Because… show simply really good. And well written and perfect. What more can be said?

But a plothole… can be a headcanon opportunity… can get you thinking more about it than the creator probably did… so sometimes bad media fun in a unique sort of way. Like Petz Dogz 2.

I love Petz Dogz 2 it’s so bad.

I know there is drama but I’m not entirely sure what that drama like… is? Evidently the creator has no idea what she’s doing and I hear she doesn’t handle criticism well but it also seems like there’s more going on? Or something? Whatever. I don’t know.

also I am far from immune to catchy song. Such songs…

But I don’t like them bringing up sex all the time that’s lame shut up I don’t care. That’s stuff you’re supposed to vaguely imply and then leave the rest to the fandom bc god knows they’ll take it from there. Have some tact. Honestly. Don’t mind the swearing too much but like. Shut up about the sex please looking at YOU.

anyway basically what I’m saying is that from a young age reading warrior cats I’ve always appreciated a good bad piece of media. I don’t know I have feelings. Getting off my chest.

The deer guy is cool and if it weren’t for the fact that every other character also has that body type I’d think it was really clever that he looks like he has Chronic Wasting Disease. Also it’s funny that he’s built like an early sexyman humanization but is aroace apparently. Except once again everybody looks like early sexyman humanization.