#but for now....mother-daughter bonding time babey!!

[syrupsyche]

🎡fantine (1817 or with cosette!)(/enjolras)

🎡: character at a fair

—imma be real; i saw that ferris wheel emoji + fantine and cosette, and immediately downloaded a rollercoaster ref. didn't even read that it was a general funfair prompt, i just wanted to draw this 😭

ty soo much for the ask hehe, sorry i got to it so late!

[dawsonscreekwasalwaysbad]

season 6 thoughts

hey quick question why the FUCK did you start with that

like on the one hand i’m glad that now i know what happened right after the end of “that’s too much man!”. on the other hand… ow

the mountain bojack climbs is called “metaphor mountain” God bless Lisa Hanawalt

i LOVE the way the episodes are framed… like you get one flashback to bojack drinking and you think that was the first time then it’s like NOPE he was even younger

CINDY CRAWFISH AKSHDJDSF

AND BABY BOJACK SNUGGLING UP TO HIS MOTHER… TRYING TO FEEL AN EMBRACE SHE WOULD NEVER GIVE… CATCH ME CRYING IN THE CLUB

WHO THE FUCK CAME UP WITH THIS NEW INTRO

AND THE WAY IT HAS ALL THOSE FLASHBACK SCENES BUT IT STILL ENDS WITH HIM FALLING INTO THE POOL AND DIANE AND PEANUTBUTTER CHECKING TO SEE IF HES OK AND THEN HES JSUT LOUNGING IN HIS APPLE SHORTS;;; it’s just,, he’s going back home in the end, going back to the place where he started, as if everything will go back to the way it was before and he’ll find himself stuck in the same cycles he tried so hard to escape… all im saying is, i dont think this season is gonna end well

and how it dwells on his past, everything he did wrong, all the most heartwrenching moments, and there aren’t any changes to the intro (as far as i could tell) until episode 8… nothing changes if all you do is look back.

I am LOVING the Mr. Peanutbutter we’re getting this season. I was never really attached to him before; it’s not that I hated him, just that I liked all the other main characters better. and now that they’ve had him do something really bad and reckon with that,, he’s plumbing new depths, exploring those dark places, questioning if he’s truly as happy as he says he is

and bonding with bojack??? who would have guessed

bojack keeps giving advice that is, at best, the kind he doesn’t follow himself, and at worst, bringing others down into the well of self-pity that he’s been stuck in the whole series

Someone give Princess Carolyn a break…

SHE NAMED HER DAUGHTER RUTHIE IM CRYING

Guy seems like a cool guy but I feel like they’re setting him up to seem nice so that it’s more surprising when it’s revealed he’s not. I’m probably being too suspicious, but also we don’t know much of the details about his divorce, do we? Lakeith Stanfield's great tho

EPISODE 4 WAS COMEDY GOLD

The return of Queefburglar69

I WANNA WRAP PICKLES UP IN A BLANKET LIKE A BURRITO AND TELL HER EVERYTHINGS OKAY

Oh man Pickles talking about how her subscribers will always be there for her… like… it’s not one person, it’s a cloud of people, the contents and shape of which changes, might even be completely different and unrecognizable from one year to the next, but they’re all still there as this nebulous support system. and it reminded me of what bojack said to young sarah lynn about how her fans are the only things she can count on

Todd is babey.

Also him wearing the ace colors under his hoodie!!

I knew Diane’s rationale for going to chicago was bullshit. she said it makes her feel good, but “it doesn’t matter where you are, it’s who you are,” and she still dwells on her bad feelings and hates herself just as much in chicago as she did in LA. moving somewhere else isn’t necessarily gonna change those tendencies, she has to work on it herself.

OH MAN AND WHEN BOJACK GETS DR CHAMP DRUNK AGAIN… THROWING THE BOTTLE OUT THE WINDOW WAS A WAY TO AVOID RUINING ANOTHER LIFE AND HE ENDS UP DOING THE EXACT THING HE HOPED HE WOULD NEVER DO AGAIN

was honestly kinda hoping that Dr Champ was just pretending he got drunk to show how bad bojack could get if he relapsed but at the end when he was like “stay…” that’s how i knew that shit was real.

todd is so fucking stupid i love him

ngl am kinda disappointed that todd’s confirmed white, cause i’ve kinda been picturing him as latino for a long time and i know rbw said he doesn’t want to alienate latino viewers who relate to todd. but it makes a  lot of sense, cause he always gets away with stupid shit and gets to the top of things without even having to try just because he knows a guy. and maybe the reason he’s so positive all the time is because it’s so easy for him to be, he never has to worry about shit bc of the privilege his whiteness affords him. also I love that we got to learn more about his backstory

THE CONTRAST BTWN “all the shitty things I did that I can barely even remember because I was high or drunk or it was thirty years ago” and “I remember everything. I’m sober now.” !!!!!!!!!!!!!

sharona sounds like a cross btwn princess carolyn and margo martindale

I have… mixed feelings about the haircut

Oh man Mr. Peanutbutter had a moment… he finally got that crossover episode… I was kinda hoping for a joke that went “Mr. Peanutbutter and BoJack Horseman in the same room? What is this, Philbert?” or “What is this, a short-lived show on a streaming network that got canceled because the star got addicted to painkillers and strangled his costar in a drugged haze?” but this is SO MUCH BETTER. I've never seen him cry before and the way he reacts to himself crying suggests that maybe he’s never cried before at all, and that’s why he just keeps laughing, almost like it’s forced, cause this is supposed to be his happiest moment and it’s not supposed to make him so sad. fucking,, character development

and the cold open of ep 8… you can forgive yourself and move on from your past wrongs but it doesn’t erase the things you did, the effects they have on people, and the trauma they’ve suffered. and then like, how can you forgive yourself if they never forgive you? how do you maintain that balance? why should you move forward if they can’t?

its weird to have an episode consisting entirely of guest stars but it also illustrates the extensive world they’ve built and i applaud that… also where the fuck is ana spanakopita

GINA RETURNS!!! HELL YEAH

her quote about not wanting to be defined by what bojack did to her has always stuck with me, and i feel like now, that quote has sort of come true. like, her saying that made us avoid reducing her to what happened to her, and thats why i wanted to see her come back this season, hopefully moving past it. but she can’t. it traumatized her. and everyone can see the effects of it but she feels like she can’t come forward, cause if she does she’ll be punished. shit like that changes you.

and it’s another instance on the show where someone chooses to advance their career & preserve their reputation over doing the right thing (like what bojack does with herb & sharona), but bojack does it out of self-interest, and gina does it so she doesn’t have to relive her trauma every time she gets interviewed or recognized by a fan. but even when she keeps quiet about it she’s still reliving her trauma

noah fence but what a waste of the once-per-season fuck word. youre really gonna use it in an episode IN WHICH BOJACK DOES NOT EVEN APPEAR, and not only that, but RECYCLE AN OLD SENTENCE FROM A PREVIOUS EPISODE

netflix places no limits on a show’s use of the fuck word (i think), so… fingers crossed for something better in the second part?

OH MY GOD PETE REPEAT INTRODUCED HIMSELF AS PETER ITS ALMOST LIKE HES TRYING TO FORGET THAT TIME & THAT PERSON HE WAS (im probably reading into it too much, I’m sure it’s mostly so we wouldn’t figure out who it was immediately. maybe im just like the kid with the coffee cup.)

and just… ppl describe this show as “family guy or the simpsons except the protagonist faces consequences for his actions” but bojack has gotten away with everything.

you ever just like… you ever watch a scene and feel the cliffhanger vibes creeping up and you just know it’s gonna end there and leave you unsatisfied and begging for more but at the same time that’s what makes it such a good place to end it. that was me with this. (and also the ending of undone)

the thing about this show is, it illustrates what it’s like to be a toxic person. and sure, he has it hard, but the show never asserts that he has it any worse than his victims, even if bojack himself does so. and he only does it so he can feel better about himself. he deserves a reckoning, he needs to pay for his bad deeds. but then, when you know what made him this way and what goes on inside his mind and that he wants to get better, it makes you feel for him, and forces you to ask if he deserves to get better and forgive himself and move forward. but even if he does, it doesn’t change the things he did. it doesn’t fix the lives he’s ruined.

anyway sound off if you think bojack’s gonna die at the end. hopefully not by suicide

[leatherbookmarking]

I need more on your Su Minshan wife and child oc for reasons! (I once had thoughts on a post canon lxc going a bit depressed mad and escaping to Moling Su to try and find out why jgy trusted sms so much more than him, when that broke, and I just have a lot of feelings about post canon Moling Su and need to hear yours)

SORRY @ragless for replying to this ask (checks) 70 years later! i was being myself which is a very time-consuming activity.

ANYWAY yeah post canon moling su is super interesting because they’ve got, what, nothing? aside from teleportation talismans, which. is a lot. but also everyone hates them now and their sect leader is dead! and also sort of left his disciples in the burial mounds as soon as things went a little bit pear-shaped, so like, thanks, zongzhu! i really wonder what those disciples did later, like, did they bring them along to yunmeng, were they like, ok, we’re out, bye!, something else? so yeah, this is my jam.

and lxc going there, trying to find answers? get to know those people? get to know who su minshan was and why jgy picked a traitor over er-ge? dear god i can FEEL how reading such a fic would feel like, oh, one hell of summer holidays!!! god. god. love that. if you have a post on that, i’d love to know more!!

WIFE AND CHILD OCS in which i am like mxtx here because they still don’t have names. i’ll have to name them at some point, but nothing’s coming to me. welp. anyway, i was thinking -- why not make them both salty underdogs who bond about that? or maybe not even that, maybe they’re met by a sheer accident! perhaps barely established sect leader su was passing by another small sect’s house, and they had an unmarried daughter, and they were like, okay, we can work with that? except the daughter is older than sms and actually divorced, but sms really isn’t looking for love, what he needs is a helping hand, any, even just one (1) literal hand, so like, yep, there we go.

also hm that got rather long so i am going to put a cut right there

and as much as i love a previously underappreciated and unloved character finally being someones #1, here i’m interested in a... subversion? not exactly, of that. there’s no big romance, they don’t even gradually fall in love after getting married, slowly discovering that the other one is a good, sensitive person! no, they’re primarily partners. the wife is here to get out of the parents’ house and finally have her own place, he is here to establish a sect and also have his own place. they’re both black sheeps of the society, more or less, either because her husband didn’t like her or because he was scared and wanted to live, and they’re shitty reason to look down on someone, so they end up bonding anyway. once they’re a bit more established, they even have a daughter and i already love her, because she has her father’s narrow lips and her mother’s narrow eyes, essentially becoming the most suspicious-looking child ever devised. and she’s a frog girl, because frogs are cool.

now, about their situation post canon -- did sms even think to leave a letter, saying his wife and child and disciples didn’t know about his Schemes, and thus shouldn’t be judged for what he’s done? or maybe he knew no one would care about that anyway -- you don’t need to punish or be violent towards someone to ruin them, just not paying attention is enough? who are his disciples and what do they think? there has to be a reason why they’re in moling su and not, say, somewhere else, even if that reason is ‘well, they’re locals, so’. do they abandon the sect and try to join one that’s... not even more powerful or richer, just ‘less looked down upon by everyone and their grandma’s dog’?

the daughter, who’s like 5-7, is simply missing her father. what about the wife? does she have a too-late realization that she was in love with her husband, actually? or maybe she wasn’t, but loved him in her own way, and she’s both furious at this asshole for leaving her alone with all this mess (he didn’t even survive! he didn’t even go to fucking dongying with lianfang-zun, they both died! what’s the fucking point! how can you fuck up that badly, minshan!!!) and sad because there used to be someone living with her, sharing her bed and dinner table, and now he’s gone?

and now, the teleportation talismans, the masking spell etc? and here i will allow myself a digression, because: people say he’s a bad cultivator, but like, he’s unremarkable next to hanguang-jun, and who isn’t! wwx says in the novel himself that his cultivation is high. he knows his sword forms and guqin tunes, and i will never be not in awe of the guqin trick in burial mounds went. do you even just fucking play Evil Music in front of Music Masters Clan -- LAN QIREN, BABEY!!! -- and they don’t notice a thing because they think you’re just Bad? poetic cinema. poetic cinema. also, about that: in the drama, he uses a mask instead of a masking spell, but i’m really into the concept of someone who’s been ignored, feels unnoticed and invisible next to hanguang-jun™, dabbling in cultivation methods that use exactly that. i think i’ve mentioned somewhere at some point eloped xiyao using talismans/spells/something that doesn’t cover your face or alter it in any physical way, but makes it so anyone who looks at you has absolutely no idea what you look like. the epitome of unremarkable and ‘uh, they looked... normal?’. i think that would be super neat for moling su to develop. WEAPONIZED ‘eh, nothing special’.

anyway: so moling su have all that, except is it a known fact, or do they know su minshan just happened to vanish at some point? because i think teleportation is a very neat trick that can both help and make someone’s life hell, and su-furen would probably have a problem, because: should she take care of stuff, educating the disciples and essentially serving as a sect leader/regent (even though she’s not the best, either at cultivation, talismans or general sect-leading, she was a wife and that’s a separate soup of duties to fill), or should she look for (yet another) husband, for her own security and safety of her disciples? what about her daughter, though? she knows what people are like, she can’t just trust them to treat her well.

ETC, ETC, I JUST. it’s so interesting!! i accidentally gave myself moling su sect feelings, lol. also, i have this cracky idea of su-furen committing Microaggressions to the chief cultivator his excellency hanguang-jun, ranging from raising her eyebrow by one mm after something he’s said to using teleportation to butt into his night hunts, deal with the thing and quietly go home, and like. who would it be. jiang cheng. jiang cheng being kinda torn between (BIG SECT LEADER SCOFF) and ‘fuck, okay, that was entertaining, do that again’.

i don’t know how comprehensible this post was, but!! thanks for the ask, i got to ramble lol;;

[girlfriendsofthegalaxy]

tuesday again no problem

difficult week, personally/professionally/politically/in the world

listening a good song never dies, van horn- i don’t know enough music theory words, but the driving guitar that comes in in the first couple seconds? good. love it. it has a sneaky but cool feel, like if modern james bond were american? i don’t really know what i mean by that bc i think that’s just the mission impossible movies BUT it has a cool, detached sound with a rougher edge. i think the chorus has my favorite lines:

Cause a good song never dies/It just reminds of where you were/The first time it made you cry/The first time you felt alive

reading finished but did not enjoy The Infinite Horizon, a modern Odyssey retelling by Noto & Duggan. didn’t quite jive with the pacing or art style, the setting in the hear future with a flooded nyc and lots of climate refugees in upstate new york that penelope has to deal with was interesting but wasn’t pushed far enough or used in an interesting manner.

watching

 the Dragon’s Dogma anime (netflix, 2020), whose opening credits have enormous Black Sails vibes. despite the many people in my life who love this game and have also told me “kay you would hate this video game”, i am shocked and appalled to find it has a standard video game plot. the only context i have for this franchise is the two-ep monster factory run. (SPOILERS FOR THE FIRST EP AND A HALF) man replaces dead wife with perfect blank slate magic no-named magic woman he names after dead mother, i said “no thank you!” out loud and closed my laptop.  

all dead wife plots would be infinitely more interesting if they were dead husband plots and here’s how i would rewrite this anime and game i know very little about:

pregnant wife survives, has to protect her young daughter who’s the only thing she has left of her beloved husband while forming an anti-dragon resistance group, turns desire for revenge into cold political fury

bc the dad rushing in headlong left such an impression on the mother she's convinced the only way to defeat her deadliest enemy is by first weakening it through politics and subterfuge/targeted assassinations against the dragon's political allies

the dragon doesn't actually have political allies this anime as-is isn't that complicated

flashback arc as the mother tries to gain political allies, where we learn how the dragon came to power: complex targeted campaign of burning certain duchies/kingdoms/key towns to the ground in order to get others in line,

the beginning of the show when the husband died was the very old dragon deciding to go on one more fire and brimstone campaign for funsies, like an old general going out to lead one last battle

dragon’s seneschal or main spokesperson or whoever is a hot witch lady under thrall or some shit bc she sought power from the dragon and it backfired spectacularly

daughter is basically emily dishonored, trained in the art of sabotage and assassination, mother uses her as a scalpel in order to maneuver the counties/kingdoms surrounding the dragon’s lair to stay out of the way of them killing the dragon

an effort that will be led by the daughter, who will probably not make it out of the spearhead effort to weaken the dragon by flooding the lair with ??? magical Greek fire or some shit?

daughter’s lover, who has been off researching the magical equivalent of Greek fire or some shit to use against the dragon, comes back with the goods and pleads with her to choose her/life/hope over almost certain death while fighting the dragon

the dragon dies the night before the daughter is about to assassinate it! she finds the dragon dead in a gigantic lavish set of a cavern of gold and skulls and shit!

struggle in power vacuum! what does a new order under no dragon look like! what’s the mother’s fucking purpose any more and what does she do with all this power she’s accumulated under the shared banner of killing the dragon! do they lie and say they did actually kill the dragon? how do the daughter and her lover fix their relationship! how do the MOTHER and her adult daughter deal with their new relationship???

WHERE DID THE DRAGON’S HOT WITCH SENESCHAL GO AND WHAT IF ANYTHING DID SHE HAVE TO DO WITH THIS. WHAT HAPPENS TO THE DRAGON’S HOLDINGS AND STAFF

season two babey! political maneuverings in the background of a murder mystery bc now the daughter wants revenge on the person who stole HER revenge and also, from her point of view, wrecked her relationships with her mother and her lover for nothing!

please god someone hire me for some sort of well-paying job bc i've made this simple revenge plot infinitely more interesting while high off my ass on benadryl

playing animal crossing continues to be a balm. gotta pick up a couple hundred acorns to make a cool table and chairs set. not a lot to say about this real simple game that’s a quiet delight. i feel like that was a lot of text all at once have a pic

making curtains, bc the light/window/curtain situation in this apartment continues to be abysmal. these two printed panels i’ve been terrified to cut into have been in my possession since the first time i came back to college. my boss at the time did a lot of networking and traveling, and she was given these at some point by someone. sensing the latent feral textile energy within me or something, although she probably just wanted to clear out her office a little bit, i got these along with a bunch of other shit that has since come to its useful end. but these two panels have been with me through half a dozen moves, and now they’re curtains.

i do not think they are the sort of religious textile a white person shouldn’t own, to the best of my research they are somewhat generic touristy souvenir fabric, but i would be interested to hear otherwise and fix my mistakes, bc i have not cut into them just made some very deep hems. they are printed slightly askew, so my regular perfectionist “pick a warp or weft thread and pin along that line” doesn’t fucking work but i mostly had room for nice finished seams. this fabric is a touch heavier than quilting cotton but lighter than a linen sheet, pretty tightly woven, a little shiny, and i would be reluctant to wash these since in the process of hemming quite a lot of the dye has come off on my hands. didn’t hem the selvedge edge bc i can’t be fucking bothered. here is an abysmal picture, i am very proud of my precise measurements and how nicely they line up. they are a little bit of a weird size proportionally speaking for this room, but they stay out of the way of the outlet and the heater, they go with my bedspread, and that’s what i really care about. if you think i’m gonna fucking iron twelve square feet of curtains you are wrong 

[quirklove]

Will you PLEASE write soft dad overHOLE scenario ?? It could be about his wife delivering the bby and he holds them for the first time and gets all soft and mushy??? Sksks Just a bunch of fluff please!🙏

sdfjkdajkglfa I’m honestly sobbing at OVERHOLE

“now that Hari is on vacation, he’s left a void, and we need to fill the family hole”

“I think YOU’RE the family hole”

ANYWAY DFJDKLAFJAKL that just made me laugh so hard I’m gonna snort everytime I think about Overhole now tHANKS

FLUFF IS WHAT YOU WANT, FLUFF IS WHAT YOU GET BABEY

can we say this girl is gonna grow up to be a Yakuza princess?

KAI has never heard Hari sound so panicked as when the other man has called to tell him that (Name) has gone into labor.

To that point, Kai himself has never felt so panicked as when he hears that.

It’s a mad rush to call a Yakuza doctor, to immediately extract himself from his business, and hurry to the makeshift delivery room the Hassaikai have practically tripped over themselves setting up. Although they’re still within the confines of the Hassaikai’s base, he does his best to gather everything he thinks they might need in case she doesn’t want to move from one room for a while.

In the months since she told him she was pregnant, he thought he prepared well enough. Now he doesn’t think he’s prepared in the slightest, but the baby is coming whether either of them feel ready or not.

Mercifully, the labor lasts all of an hour, if that. The doctor is trustworthy, though the time he and the infant are out of sight in the adjacent medical room is enough to make Kai nervous. Then the baby is announced as a healthy girl, given a name they’d picked out beforehand, (Saiken), placed in his wife’s arms, and it’s as if every bit of his anxiety fades away, even if just for a moment.

He looks down at the two of them, feeling almost like he’s watching this whole thing from the outside in. Like it’s a scene in a movie. Is this actually happening? Has he really just become a father?

For the first time in what feels like a while, he removes his mask as he keeps his eyes on (Name) and their baby. He couldn’t bear to keep his normal, unwieldy mask on as soon as he got into the room, and the simple black one beneath it feels like it’s suffocating him, a stark contrast to the way he usually experiences the world.

But he can’t. He can’t have his daughter’s first glimpse of him be something that hides his face from her.

Without it, anxiety sets in, and a telltale itch raises up on the side of his cheek. He hangs back away from his wife and child, staring at them in a way that is clearly, painfully conflicted. The two of them are so unbelievably pure, he doesn’t know how in the world he’s going to bear this.

(Name) knows him by now. When she lifts her gaze up to him, her expression tired and happy, she can tell in an instant what’s going on inside his head. Just her eyes beckon him forward, urging him to come closer. “Kai.” Her voice is a whisper that never fails to draw him in. “Come on, honey. Come look at her.”

“… She’s…” A sort of trembling comes into his voice, betraying his attempt at staying calm. “She’s beautiful. I… can’t… touch her and ruin—”

“Kai.” She sounds firmer this time, though there’s an unmistakable gentleness, something she always has with him. Those gorgeous, exhausted eyes of hers are silently pleading with him. “Come hold your daughter.”

Within a minute or two, she’s placed the little baby into his arms. He’s shaking, terrified, more unsure of himself than he’s felt in decades. Looking at his daughter worries him.

In Saiken, he sees his own childhood repeated. He sees silhouettes past glass, more shadowy concepts than clear people, a mother frustrated to the point of violence and a father walking away. He sees toys littering the floor of a lonely room, untouched, given simply because a parent think that’s a substitute for caring, affection, and bonds. He sees a child crying, ashamed of their own power, feeling so unloved they don’t think they could give love to anyone else, afraid to touch anyone else.

(Is it him? Is it Eri? Is it his own daughter? All three? God. He has failed so much already.)

It was never apparent to him until recently just how badly he is damaged, and how badly he’s damaged someone else who he should have kept safe. He doesn’t even understand it. Kai Chisaki is an intelligent man. How could he have never realized that he was doing the same thing that was done to him?

How can he stop history from repeating itself? How is he supposed to protect his daughter from himself?

In her, he sees everything that he could do wrong.

But he also sees hope.

Everything about his world has shifted in an instant. Even though things changed when he met and began a relationship with (Name), it’s changed so much more now. There is something that matters more than him, more than all his dreams and plans and selfish wants, and that something is cradled against his chest, whining as she adjusts to existence.

The action of gingerly bouncing her in his arms is almost instinctive, as if his heart knows what she needs in this moment even though he has no real clue how to care for a child. It’s something he’s read in books and articles — like he’s been reading a lot of ever since his wife told him she was pregnant, things like how you need to cradle a baby’s head because they can’t support it themselves, or how babies cry when they’re hungry or need to be changed or want to be held and sometimes for no reason at all, or how it’s not necessarily a bad thing if you don’t feel an immediate, unconditional love for your baby in the first few months.

Contrary to the entire rest of his life, Kai has never felt such an instant connection to anyone or anything as he does with his daughter.

She is so tiny and she looks kind of like a strange pink raisin with soft hair and she sounds sort of like a police siren, and she’s perfect, and he loves her so much, and she hasn’t been alive but maybe ten minutes.

For her, he thinks he can do anything.

Even if anything includes changing the way he looks at the entire world.

She and (Name) deserve the best of him, and he’s not the best of him right now. Despite the fact that he knows he’s never going to be flawless, he needs to be better. He needs to do better.

After what feels like an eternity, he glances from Saiken back to (Name). What he can offer is a breathless, elated, wavery, “Can you believe we made her?”

His wife laughs, and when he lowers himself into a chair, she kisses his cheek. One hand wanders to carefully comb through their daughter’s downy hair, eliciting an inquisitive coo from the infant.

“Oh, I can believe it. She’s got that same sparkle in her eyes as you.”

[joculatrick]

she-ra...but it's avatar....

au time babey

it's in the time of sozin + roku (it fits a lot better shh)

catra + adora grow up in the fire nation

they're in an elite soldier training program they were inducted into at 5

sw is their supervisor, a water bender that defected from the nwt for power

they never knew their parents

both are stars of the program, adora first and catra a persistent second despite her unique blue firebending

at one point in their late teens they go exploring farther from base than usual, deep into some woods bordering the ocean

adora starts to hear whispers. ancient voices telling her she has a purpose and worth outside of being a soldier, telling her to do something she doesnt quite catch

catra pulls her away, distrustful of the idea of voices and change and tries to dissuade adora from returning, and to avoid upsetting her adora pretends to concede

of course, she does return, and the voices coax her into bending air and discovering she's the avatar

shocked to her core, having been told that the avatar died out, adora is at a loss

suddenly she's wrapped in ocean water and out spring glimmer, the daughter of the chieftess of the water tribe, and her nonbender bff bow

the 2 snuck off a northern water tribe ship sent to spy on the growing fire nation army

delighted to have caught an elite soldier of said army, glimmer and bow are totally hostile towards their hostage

pleading with her captors, adora says she's the avatar and bends fire and air (a lil bit, shes a beginner)

bow and glimmer's jaws drop. the world had been alert for the avatar but the fire nation had claimed that a new one was never born so the world mourned

confused but warming to adora, b + g take her back to the ship and immediately their captain strikes a course back the nwt

on the way they discover how sheltered and abused adora was and start helping her heal, as well as bonding!! adora tries to bend water on the way but has very little success, it is her opposite after all

bfs rolls up to angella, leader of the nwt

unsurprisingly she's not eager to trust

but after some time, everyone basically adopts adora the avatar because she's just that lovable

meanwhile, in the fire nation...

with adora absent, catra finally gets to be first and graduates top in her program, becoming a commander of her former classmates

she feels utterly betrayed and abandoned by adora and takes on the task of hunting down and delivering the avatar to firelord hordak with vigor

she's accompanied in the task by scorpia, who as daughter of 2 general moms felt she had to inherit the mantle even though she's not much of a fighter

even though scorpia's a commander herself she's infatuated with catra and follows her command

eccentric IT genius entrapta, who built herself 2 prehensile arms attached to her back via harness, is often consulting the 2 and strikes up a friendship with them (super pal trio for life!)

now, back to the best friend squad and element learning:

adora's waterbending teachers are princesses glimmer of the northern tribe and mermista of the southern tribe!

glimmer is a talented bender but never the master her mom is no matter how much she struggles

she is a much better leader though, as well as a good friend

obviously adora struggles a lot with water, and that coupled with the nwt recieving dire messages from their sister tribe prompts the bfs to travel to the south pole

once there, they discover that the fire nation has been raiding the swt

after sending a message to her mother for northern reinforcements, glimmer and squad invite mermista, daughter of the chief and ridiculously talented water bender, to the group

(glimmer imagines herself mermista's rival and pushes herself wayyyyy too hard to try and top her. eventually, with reassurance and camaraderie with adora, she gets over it)

from there, the princesses + bow (as bow teasingly calls them) start the long trip to the earth kingdom

along the way - bonding, shenanigans including adopting pirate comedian seahawk, flirting (adora to glim, unknowingly, glim gay panics) ((seahawk to everybody)), bending practice (adora finally makes bubbles! and waves! she's ecstatic and splashes everyone constantly)

finally, they arrive at the earth kingdom!

it's adora's first time seeing a bustling city not made of ice and she generally just looks around in awe (glim thinks it's adorable)

how adora wishes she could share it with catra.

as representatives of the northern and southern water tribes, and the avatar of course, the group is invited to a fancy ball hosted by a powerful family

there, adora and fam run into catra, there as rep from the fire nation. there's dancing. and lots of gay tension.

the host of the ball is none other than frosta, recently orphaned and secret master earth bender (I went more based on personality than Princess Ability for the elements of the alliance members, and if you make a couple logical science jumps earthbenders could bend ice)

after adora and crew fend off some burglars that interrupt the ball, frosta is enamored and begs to join the group and teach adora earthbending

she does just that, with a healthy dose of tough love

at this point, the bfs are seasoned friends and formidable fighters

unfortunately, after a timely break and a few vacations, the pals hear a devastating message. "the fire nation attacked the north pole, trying the capture the moon spirit to control the source of water bending. the attack failed, but only because angella gave her life to stop it."

stunned, the group returns to the north pole. bonds are tested under the weight of glimmer's grief and impending responsibility.

once there, glimmer has her coronation ceremony and becomes distant and stressed, bending over the weight of a whole tribe to lead

after a tough couple months, adora feels her last element calling to her. glimmer pleads her to stay and help defend her nation but adora needs space to breathe, and doesnt feel confident as a protective force without well rounded bending knowledge. she leaves. bow accompanies her

the 2 journey to the western air temple, the closest to the fire nation, because it just feels right to adora. bow worries.

there they find perfuma, stalwart gardener and accomplished airbending student, the mysterious madame razz, and a young dragon named swift wind

perfuma teaches through learning WITH adora, and this method really helps adora find confidence and some inner peace, away from the chaos and demands of her life

finally having an animal companion also helps! he's fun loving and flies while she glides and is an excellent listener

madame razz speaks in riddles, but she helps adora learn about her past lives and the chakras. throughout this process adora accepts a lot of what makes her her, but she gets stuck on letting go of attachment

letting go of her friends, her found family, is tough, very tough, but even after she manages that she's still not there. there's only one face she sees and she doesn't understand how she hasn't let her go yet

meanwhile, in the fire nation...

the attack on the nwt was a huge success, mainly due to catra's tactics

however, her habit of challenging authority left her in a tough spot with firelord hordak from the beginning, and her control of this last battle was the last straw

he challenges her to an agni kai, claiming she undermined his authority

she wins

keeping sw as an advisor, she takes command, and her first target? the western air temple

all together now!

in the midst of adora's training, catra strikes

she slashes adora's confidence, back, and progress on letting go of attachment

the chakra is locked

catra ends up defeated, but only just, and only because glimmer showed up with a ship full of water benders and scorpia and entrapta defect

meanwhile, charismatic political leader prime leads his followers in an uprising, kidnapping catra and glimmer after the battle ends

captive at prime's estate on a faraway island, catra and glimmer bond over adora, rashness, and isolation. it's rough but at least they're not alone

desperate to save glimmer, adora and bow pile on swift wind and start searching for the elusive island

when they arrive, catra creates a distraction and frees glimmer, sending her to adora with a message not to return

the bfs is finally reunited, but adora is missing something. she confesses she wants to rescue catra and glimmer is right with her

with adora on the attack, sw bloodbends catra to fight her, finally throwing catra off a cliff. adora follows

shifting into the avatar state through pure rage, adora heals catra, beats sw, and takes catra home

catra bonds with the bfs and starts to heal, and her and adora slowly return to their flirty best friendship

glimmer and catra flirt up a storm "as a joke" (the only ones they fool are eachother)

adora knows they'll have to defeat prime. there will never be peace with him in power

they come up with a plan, but it mainly relies on adora sacrificing herself. adora knows it's her pupose

catra can't stay and watch, she can't

adora is heart broken

on her way to prime, she has a vision of catra, its tender and loving and it hurts

catra comes back. she passes glimmer and bow guarding the way. glimmer hugs her

right before adora enters the throne room, catra pulls her back

she kisses her

adora finally understands, and becomes a fully realized avatar, and uses the avatar state with control to defeat prime

catra and adora and glimmer and bow watch their world blossom with a new peace

[unconditionaldrarry]

Chapter 3: Happy Birthday

/ chapter 1 / chapter 2

(Smut under the cut)

———

Male pregnancy is a complicated thing, the magic involved is very confusing and intricate, and far too long to explain.

The doctors checked all of Draco’s statistics, and everyone was hushed out of the room except Harry and his Mother. Male childbirth in the magical world is not dissimilar to a Caesarean section, as the baby is lifted directly from Draco’s womb.

Now as a cis man, Draco wasn’t born with a womb, but, during sex gay wizards can create bonds that make them susceptible to pregnancy, which is exactly what happened. It is very rare and often takes years to occur, and very rarely happens more than once, so obviously, Draco and Harry would be the pair that had it happen twice, by accident.

Anyway, the whole process takes about 10 minutes, Draco was put under local anaesthetic, as two magi-doctors lifted his child out. As soon as she was brought into the world Draco’s stomach was healed up, and his womb disappeared.

———

“Oh Harry look, isn’t she gorgeous!” Draco cried happily as their daughter was laid on his chest.

“I’m so proud of you” Harry smiled, tears in his eyes as he gazed at his daughter. He kissed Draco lovingly, and Narcissa joined them in admiring the addition to their family.

The nurse asked if they wanted to let their friends back in, and the couple agreed feverenlty. Pansy and Hermione bounded into the room first, exclaiming shrilly at the sight of their god daughter.

“Isn’t she the most perfect thing!” cried Pansy, ecstatic with joy.

“We’re so happy for you, mate” Ron said to Harry, with Blaise nodding in agreement.

“What are you going to name her?” Asked Narcissa, with obvious interest. Draco looked up at Harry, who smiled back at him and nodded. “I decided a few weeks ago, I knew she was going to be a girl before we even got the results. Her name is going to be Lily Raina, Lily after Harry’s mother of course, and Raina because when derived from Latin, means Queen, I don’t know why but I feel it’s quite fitting”. His mother nodded in agreement, her smile bursting from her face.

“It’s beautiful, Darling. I do say I’d have to have objected to you naming her after me- you know how I despise family traditions. Raina is the best break you could’ve chosen”.

The room was filled with happiness and tears of joy, all of them worshipping the little girl, who had huge grey eyes, and thick, black curls. She was an astonishing mix of her two fathers.

———

Two days later, they were back home in bed, with James tucked up between them as Draco held Lily. James had been enchanted by the sight of his little sister, wanting to know everything about her. The resemblance between them was shocking, although James’ hair was blonde and clearly much tamer than his sisters. Harry couldn’t help but be overjoyed at the sight of his family, still not understanding how we deserved such a wonderful husband, and their two brilliant children.

“Right, James, it’s time to go to bed my love” Draco told their son, who sighed in reply.

“Can Lily sleep in my room?” He begged, looking up with pleading eyes at his parents.

“No, little one, she has to sleep in her crib for now” Harry told him as he lifted the boy out of their bed. James curled himself around his father, already falling asleep. Draco kissed his son’s forehead before standing up himself to lay their new born in her crib.

Finally they were alone again, Draco thought, as he curled up into his lovers arms. Harry had barely left his side, but there had always been someone else they had to deal with too. Not that Draco minded, but as Harry pulled him close and kissed his forehead, he was pleased to be on their own. He had never been happier in his life, and for that, he was grateful.

———

Smut under the cut, babey. If you don’t like smut, you don’t have to read it, but it’s very light and kinda helps the story- you can stop here tho, so don’t worry if you aren’t interested.

———

1 month later-

“God, you don’t understand how much I’ve wanted this, Draco. Missed being inside of you so much” he growled into his husbands ear as their hands roamed over eachother, both of them like horny teenagers once again.

“I can’t believe you made me wait so long! Hurry up and get naked, I need your cock in me now” the blonde whined, as he bit and kissed at Harry’s neck.

The pair rushed to hw their clothes off, both of them riled up from waiting. It had been a hectic month, and they finally had some time alone together as Narcissa was looking after their children.

Finally they were naked, Harry pushed them both into their bed, kissing passionately. Harry reaches for his wand and cast lubing spells and of course, protection spells. “Hurry the fuck up!” His stroppy his husband yelled, causing them both to giggle.

“So tight, oh so tight!” Harry grunted into his husbands neck, as he pounded into Draco, who was moaning uncontrollably underneath him. Neither of them would last long, Harry could already feel Draco clenching around him, and his own thrusts were speeding up, Draco’s legs hitching higher over his shoulders.

“Harryyy! Oh gods I’m coming!” Harry smirked, kissing his husband through his orgasm as he sought out his own release which came shortly after.

They were both panting heavily, Harry rested his forehead against his husband’a and they shared a euphoric smile.

“I love doing that so much, especially with you” Draco sighed, pulling his Harry into a hug. “I love you too, pretty”. This was some of Harry’s favourite sex that they had, full of love and happiness. And he’d missed it a lot, missed spending time together, but now the could spend time as a bigger family, the family neither of them thought they would have- or deserved. But, they did.

And they lived happily ever after.

———

Woahhh this has taken WAY longer than expected to come out! The smut isn’t a big part of this but I wanted it to be part of the story. This is the last part, and I hope you guys have enjoyed this series! Asks will be reopened soon but I’m not going to rush to complete them anymore, I’ll release stuff when I want ;)

I realise now I could’ve made Draco a trans character :( but I didn’t wanna just add it in now as a rush idea, if I’d thought of it earlier it would’ve been a key part in the story so I apologise, I hope it’s okay!

And to my Raina, I didn’t tag you in this but I knew you’d read it because you always support me :’) I hope you like being included in this sweet <3

-J

[lemon-writings]

Hamish Update: Hamish Pt. II

Genre: Adult literary fiction // Status: Rewriting // Progress: 53,548 words

Pt. I

I’m back with chapters IV-VI! Hoo boy, is it an event.

Chapter IV

Epitaph: “The things that go unsaid are often the things that eat at you--whether because you didn't get to have your say, or because the other person never got to hear you and really wanted to.”-Celeste Ng, Everything I Never Told You

This is the chapter where we meet Ofelia! She is one of my favorite characters to write for. She is beautiful and wonderful and a goddess and I adore her. (I’m reading myself for filth through the character of Ofelia because she is literally both my type and the woman I’ve always wanted to be.) Ofelia is the Queen of Roasts.

There are also some confrontations between Hamish and his mother, which I live for.

Excerpts: 

First of all, I love Ofelia. Ofelia Bello, if you are free this Thursday, I’m free to hang out any time. Again, Ofelia Bello, if you are on Thursday, I’m free to hang out. Please.

She’s a goddess. Literal goddess.

She looked at me, eyes large and all-seeing, more like fire opals set into the bronze of her face than eyes. I felt as though she were seeing into the very essence of my being, judging me like a god. Ofelia was one of those people who would never be referred to as mortal. She was Prithvi; she was Freyja; she was Persephone. She was anything but mortal, made of fire, flowers, and knowledge.

And a savage. She’s That Bitch every moment of every day, even when she has her “perfect daughter and sister” persona on. And when she doesn’t? Well...

“You could fight back,” she said. “You could make yourself known, reveal who and what you are. Scream, I’m a person, not a thing.” Ofelia fixes the wisps of hair arranged around her face into a perfect frame. 

“I’m not a fighter,” I said.

“No,” Ofelia said, watching me carefully. “You’re a runner.” She uncrossed her legs and stretched them out. “He doesn’t like fighters. That’s me. That’s my brother. He loves runners. If you can confront your issues, you won’t stay for long.”

Hamish confronting his mother when she dismisses his childhood trauma is honestly *chef’s kiss*. Writing my characters being savages is one of my favorite things to do, right after dramatic, floral descriptions of women. 

(TW: referenced child abuse!)

“Ungrateful for what? My nightmares? My feelings of abandonment? My hatred of authority? Thank you so much for everything you’ve done for me, mother. Without yours and father’s amazing parenting, I would’ve grown up to be a well-adjusted adult.”

And the trademark Soft Moment of the chapter. 

(TW: death mention!)

“Don’t die,” you whispered, hot and damp against my face. “Please don’t die.”

“I won’t,” I promised you, so open and honest it felt like I’d cracked open my ribs to expose my child’s-heart to you like a blossoming flower. 

The tension between all the characters has increased so much in this chapter and tbh the anticipation is killing me, and I know what happens in this book.

Chapter V

Epitaph: “At parties I point to my body and say This is where love comes to die. Welcome, come in, make yourself at home. Everyone laughs, they think I’m joking.”--Warsan Shire, “The House”

This chapter begins with Hamish and Horacio in an interview about their “relationship”. There’s something lovely about the way that Horacio and Hamish talk about each other, even if it is built on half-truths. Then we’re introduced to Leon, Ofelia’s brother, and oh boy. Oh boy. Is that a wild ride.

This is also the chapter where Hamish begins planning how he’s going to get Claude to confess to the murder, via a PowerPoint presentation. Yes. Yes, good.

Excerpts:

The first is when Horacio is asked when he knew he was in love with Hamish. It’s just... soft. As a former theatre kid, this really is the dream.

“No,” I said, tearing my eyes from you. “We were in Theatre 101 together, and he was reading Doctor Faustus and playing all the parts. He was jumping around and doing different voices, being really dramatic and having the time of his life. It was the first time I’d seen him act young instead of like a wistful old man.”

I didn’t tell her that you’d been wearing a black hoodie with the moon phases printed on it, the strings following you as you leaped from place to place, sticking your tongue out when you fumbled a line, your tongue stud glittering in the lights. It felt too intimate to share with the world. When I saw you in the lights, being a goofy young man for even just a moment, in your purest state of adorable in your glee, my heart expanded well past the confines of my too-tight ribcage.

Here’s Horacio’s mention of his past ex-boyfriends, because he can hardly believe that he is in a semi-functional relationship with anyone, even if it’s fake.

(TW: sex and abuse!)

It was simple symbiosis: I was a parasite, and they were the hosts, defending themselves against me with violence. I don’t think any of them ever loved me, just loved using me while I would use them, trying to nibble on their scraps of affection between beatings and the rough sex.

Leon is... a lot. He’s sort of obsessed with masculinity, like someone who watched Fight Club without really realizing it’s meant to be satire and wants to punch whoever talks shit about him.

Leon was one of those guys who either believed he was better than you or you weren’t worth his time. Sometimes, in his more complex moments, he would believe both at once; at his most simplistic, he would believe neither. 

The further I go in this work, the more difficult it gets to pick excerpts!

Chapter VI

Epitaph: “Even still, we run. We have not reached our average of 57.92 years without knowing that you run through it, and it hurts and you run through it some more, and if it hurts worse, you run through it even more, and when you finish, you will have broken through. In the end, when you are done, and stretching, and your heartbeat slows, and your sweat dries, if you've run through the hard part, you will remember no pain.”--Lauren Groff, The Monsters of Templeton

Hamish gives the presentation. It goes about as well as you can assume. Now that Genoveva and Claude know he’s onto them... it’s game time. There is so much plot that happens in this chapter that I can’t really mention much of it, other than this being the point where the work goes from a slow-building horror to more of a thriller. It’s a major turning point and climax. Whoo!

Also, Ofelia and Horacio bond, which is awesome! I love the dynamic between them. They have the sort of friendship where you can tell that they really enjoy each other and their company.

Excerpts:

Most of these are from the portion where Ofelia and Horacio are talking in the woods because 1.) it’s the least-spoilery part of this chapter and 2.) their friendship is one of the most light-hearted parts of this work. Please, allow me to indulge.

Ofelia isn’t necessarily a “bean”, but she’s still babey. I adore her.

Ofelia gave me a mysterious look, full of night sky and brilliance, then added a crescent of a smile. She began climbing, one foot and then the other, effortlessly lifting herself up the branches as if she was built to do nothing but ascend trees, her tights protecting her modesty from me as I struggled up after her, unused to the climb. 

And then Ofelia describes a dream of mine every wlw: going a group of young women and becoming the modern Sappho. 

“I think I’ll buy a house somewhere by the ocean. Live with a group of girls who love books and pictures. Become my own Sappho, create my own Lesbos.” 

Then there’s this astute observation from Horacio about how Hamish views himself. Hamish doesn’t have a very good self-image. At all. Then again, neither does Horacio. 

You’d make yourself into an object sometimes, a cyclone of emotions and pain, held together by frozen flesh and string. 

So that just about wraps up these chapters. IV-VI really is the most intense part of this work, and writing it is is just as intense as the chapters themselves. 

Songs:

The music is mostly what I’ve been listening to while editing this post, since I already wrote these chapters, but they’re still jams

Your Love (Deja Vu) - Glass Animals

In the Heat of the Moment - Noel Gallagher’s High Flying Birds

Blood In the Cut - Seattle Sessions - K.Flay

Peach Scone - Hobo Johnson

That’s all for now! Part III will contain the falling action/the part where it gets Real.

Tell me if you’d like to be added to the tag list! :)

[viragofm-blog]

*               girl     as     a     slicked     -     back     chignon          ,          not     a     𝘩𝑎𝑖𝑟     out     of     place          ;          chanel     no.     5     and     formaldehyde          dancing     a     fatal     tango          in     a     gentle     wave          ,          grit     of     a     sharp     jaw     and     flattened     line     of     cherry     -     lacquered     shapes          .          precise     handwriting     and          frustratingly     neat         study     guides          ,          a     neat     bullet     journal          ,          your     phone     calender     perfectly     synced          /          strict     in     your     discipline          ,          it’s     a     cup     of     𝘣𝘭𝘢𝘤𝘬     𝘤𝘰𝘧𝘧𝘦𝘦     and     half     a     grapefruit     in     the     morning          ,          it’s     the     way     you     furl     yourself     around         routine          .          a     crucifix     worn     around     the     neck          ,          golden     against     pale     hollow     of          that     lovely     throat          /          a     family     heirloom     passed     down     in     a     matriarchy     quite     unlike     any     other          ,          a     photo     of     your     family     in     a     locket          .          a     poetry     anthology     with     flowers     pressed     into     the     middle          ,          all     very     ironic     of     you          .          

𝖗𝖔𝖚𝖓𝖉     𝖔𝖓𝖊     .          ╱          𝙨𝙩𝙖𝙩𝙞𝙨𝙩𝙞𝙘𝙨     .

full  name:     evelyn  marianne  authier  .

aliases:     none  .  her  family  call  her  eve  sometimes  ,  but  she  goes  strictly  by  evelyn  .

age:     twenty - five  .

date  of  birth:     october  30th  ,  1994  .

place  of  birth:     paris  ,  france  .

nationality:     french  .

gender  identity:     cisgender  female  ,  uses  she/her  pronouns  .

sexual     &     romantic  identity:     pansexual  panromantic  .

alma  mater:     gallagher  university  .

major:     medical  training  .

𝖗𝖔𝖚𝖓𝖉     𝖙𝖜𝖔     .          ╱          𝙗𝙞𝙤𝙜𝙧𝙖𝙥𝙝𝙞𝙘𝙖𝙡𝙨     .

evelyn  marianne  authier  comes  from  a  line  of  french  spies  whose  name  is  forever  cemented  in  the  history  books  .  the  authier  women  have  been  working  in  french  intelligence  since  world  war  ii  ,  and  rumour  has  it  that  one  of  their  ancestors  was  integral  in  bringing  down  kings  .  regardless  of  the  hushed  speculation  that  surrounds  the  authier  women  ,  their  infamy  is  felt  throughout  intelligence  agencies  worldwide  .  

she  is  raised  by  her  mother  ,  two  aunts  and  her  grandmother  .  there  are  no  men  around  ,  never  have  been  .  she�� is  taught  everything  she  needs  to  know  by  her  mother  and  her  sisters  and  their  mother  ,  a  fierce  matriarchy  whose  legacy  burns  brightest  in  their  youngest  member  .

her  grandmother  ,  françoise  jean  authier  ,  worked  in  seduction  ,  a  legend  if  ever  there  was  one  /  mothered  three  girls  ,  almost  like  a  family  curse  .  no  men  ,  all  women  .  evelyn  looks  at  her  grandmother  with  a  sense  of  reverie  ,  an  awe  hidden  behind  sooty  lashes  .  françoise  teaches  her  culture  ,  takes  her  to  art  museums  and  to  theatre  shows  and  cultivates  cool  poise  and  grace  in  her  granddaughter  .  a  deep  bond  runs  between  the  two  ,  and  to  this  day  evelyn  writes  letters  to  her  grandmother  weekly  .  they’ve  never  lost  communication  ,  not  once  .

her  aunts  ,  marie  and  clementine  ,  are  assassins  ,  and  fucking  good  ones  .  as  far  as  she  remembers  ,  the  smell  of  blood  has  always  clung  to  them  like  the  sweetest  /  sickest  perfume  .  they  kiss  the  grim  reaper  on  the  cheek  three  times  a  day  ,  send  him  off  with  another  warm  body  and  smoke  cigarettes  over  dinner  .  she  admires  them  like  nothing  else  .

mother  dearest  ,  mother  with  a  heart  of  gold  reserved  only  for  her  family  .  danielle  authier  does  a  little  bit  of  everything  ,  can’t  be  pinned  down  to  one  particular  skill  --- -  she  is  a  wonderful  mother  ,  first  and  foremost  .  she  raises  evelyn  with  love  and  warmth  and  the  knowledge  that  once  her  little  girl  grows  up  ,  she  will  take  after  the  women  in  her  family  .  she  raises  her  daughter  with  pride  ,  with  joy  ,  with  everything  a  child  could  want  .  

evelyn’s  aware  of  the  family  she’s  been  born  into  ,  and  finds  pride  in  the  fact  that  she  will  grow  up  to  be  just  like  her  mother  ,  her  aunts  ,  her  grandmama   --- -  she  longs  for  the  day  that  she  becomes  one  of  them  .  even  as  a  child  ,  she  yearns  to  follow  in  their  footsteps  .  she’s  not  entirely  sure  that  seduction  is  something  she’s  capable  of  (  not  in  the  same  way  that  grandmama  is  --- -  she  doesn’t  have  the  same  cynosure  ,  doesn’t  draw  attention  with  a  golden  aura  and  a  devilish  smile  the  way  her  grandmother  is  rumoured  to  ,  even  now  )  ,  and  assassination  isn’t  quite  her  thing  either  .  

as  a  child  ,  she’s  softer  than  she  is  as  an  adult  .  there’s  something  light  in  the  way  she  smiles  /  glow  emanates  from  pink  cheeks  when  she  leaves  her  weekly  ballet  classes  ,  warm  and  gentle  and  lovely  and  when  she  grows  ,  matures  into  the  sharpened  woman  that  she  will  that  loveliness  still  tinges  features  with  something  rosy  but  it’s  so  pronounced  as  a  child  .  she  offers  kindly  smiles  ,  laughs  loud  and  unrelenting  and  beautiful  into  the  cool  midnight  air  .  it  almost  breaks  her  mother’s  heart  .

prep  school  is  a  blur  of  glowing  report  cards  ,  ice  forming  in  those  wide  eyes  ,  spine  stiffening  ;  she  is  less  wildflower  and  more  crashing  wave  ,  learning  to  be  brutal  and  unforgiving  ,  deft  in  the  way  she  wreaks  her  havoc  .  she  excels  in  sciences  ,  almost  scarily  so  ---  she  takes  to  chemistry  and  biology  like  nothing  else  .  human  biology  makes  sense  to  her  ,  the  way  everything  flows  and  connects  .  (  author  wld  like  to  take  a  min  to  acknowledge  that  she  knows  literal  fuck  all  abt  science  bc  she  dropped  out  of  physics  in  yr  10  and  failed  biology  in  yrs  11 - 12  so  fuckin  yikes  here  )

she’s  set  to  start  at  a  french  academy  ,  earned  herself  a  legacy  spot   ---  but  a  glimmering  letter  throws  that  plan  right  to  the  wind  ,  because  the  gallagher  academy’s  gotten  wind  of  the  authier  women  and  have  claimed  their  first  .  evelyn  doesn’t  think  twice  about  accepting  ,  spurred  on  by  her  family  .  (  they’ve  been  meaning  to  branch  out  ,  and  it  only  makes  sense  to  send  her  off  as  the  first  of  the  gang  to  die  ,  if  we  want  to  get  all  morrissey - y  about  it  all  )

she  takes  to  gallagher  like  a  duck  to  water  ,  and  if  there  was  any  lingering  warmth  buried  in  those  bones  it’s  swiftly  burnt  right  out  .  ice  queen  cometh  ;  earns  herself  quite  the  reputation  for  that  cold  demeanour  ,  clipped  accent  and  brusque  attitude  .  climbs  to  the  top  of  the  ladder  quick  ,  ruthless  baby  dressed  in  creams  and  pale  pinks  .  works  harder  ,  smarter  ,  cleverer  ,  knows  her  fuckin  shit  and  makes  no  mistakes  about  it  .

i  hate  this  intro  please  let  it  be  known  that  evelyn  deserves  better  than  all  this  bullshit  /  i  can  actually  write  i  swear  to  god

anyways   !   third  year  has  only  furthered  the  bitter  bite  of  a  caustic  tongue  ,  digs  deeper  into  glacial  hues  and  she’s  fine  with  it  ,  fine  with  the  cool  exterior  that  she’s  built  around  herself  .  softness  is  rare  to  come  by  ,  viewed  less  as  a   reprieve  and  more  as  a  weapon  that  can  be  used  against  her  .  again  :  ice  queen  babey  ,  that’s  the  move  .

idk  i  jus  need  to  finish  this  i  love  her  A  Lot  please  excuse  all  of  this  fucking  NONSENSE