#but every single week the clowning is getting worse

[athreadofgold]

I have started to resent rep tv truthers

[mlmxreader]

Sickly | Art the Clown x gn!reader

『••✎••』

↳ ❝ Hi! I saw that you wanted to write more for Art?

I saw your sick fic about him and thought it was so cute! Would you maybe consider doing a part two where Art’s in bed (still in his clown costume because he literally sleeps with that thing) with the reader but he can’t sleep because he’s got the sniffles that bad? And his silent sneezes are just pitiful for the reader to watch lol ❞

: ̗̀➛ You resign yourself to a night of devoting yourself to Art whilst he's sick.

trigger warnings: ̗̀➛ swearing, sickness/illness, mentions of murder & gore

↳ Part One: Feverish

•───────────────★•♛•★──────────────•

The soft sound of Downton Abbey episodes were playing softly from your television as you did your best to sleep; but with Art beside you, constantly lunging forward and silently sneezing and coughing, it was difficult to get any sort of rest whatsoever.

You didn't know if it was better or worse that he made no sound, but even his harsh movements were enough to constantly justle you.

"Just how long is she here for?" Lady Violet asked her son.

"Who knows?" Came the quiet, mumbled reply of Lord Grantham.

You laughed softly at the exchange, which roused Art to shuffle around as he moved to grasp your attention; he tapped your shoulder, and when you looked at him, he pointed to the box of tissues that laid at the bedside table.

Even in the low light, you could see the snot clinging from his nostril, desperate to make it down to his black stained lips. You winced, immediately grabbing them and pressing the box into his lap; Art nodded in thanks, and roughly, violently, rubbed his nose on the tissue.

You had grown used to the fact that he always wore that fucking clown costume, even when he was lying in bed, but you were slightly less likely to think of a complaint given that he was sick and had been ever since his most recent return.

He didn't leave you as often as he used to, in fact, he hadn't left at all since he had come back to you. It was... odd.

You didn't really know what to think of it, if you were honest - sure, you were glad to spend any time with him without interruption. But you weren't used to having him around so often.

Lingering around you like the smell of rotting meat.

Granted, he did smell a lot cleaner than usual thanks to you; he had access to your shower and all your gels and shampoos and body lotions, and he always copied you when you washed in the morning and again in the evening.

He never exactly smelled fully clean, the metallic scent of blood and rotting meat always clung to him, but he didn't smell rancid like he usually did.

Even his breath smelled better now that you were making him brush his teeth after every meal to ensure that the bits of gooey brain matter and sharp shards of bone didn't get stuck between them and fester.

His teeth were always difficult to brush properly, their long and pointed shape, more akin to a lamprey than anything remotely humanoid, made it extra work to get between them without the bristles breaking immediately.

Art moved again, clutching his ribs as he opened his mouth to cough wetly and roughly, even though not a single sound left him; you felt pity, really. You had never seen him in such awful ways.

You coaxed him to lie down between your legs, the back of his head pressed against your stomach as you gently massaged his scalp. His breathing was slow and shallow, like he was struggling to get any oxygen in at all, and you turned the television up slightly.

Art watched the television, appreciating the monochromatic colour schemes of the gentlemen as much as the staff; their black and white outfits were much like his own, although with a different pattern.

He wondered what they would do if he went and bashed their heads in with all those shiny things in the shelves; the blood splattering all over their walls and carpets and paintings. So many people in one house, he wouldn't have to ask for anything to eat for weeks. Months.

But then the scene opened to a young couple - a brunette woman and a dirty blond man - sharing a bed; the duvet was red, with a white stripe at the top, and the headboard was a dark red colour. It looked a lot like your bed, although yours was green, not red.

He pointed excitedly for a moment, then dramatically sneezed against his sleeve at above the elbow.

"Oh, Art," you hummed softly, patting him gently so he relaxed against you again. "Settle down, too much excitement will make you worse, y'know."

He mocked sulking as he folded his arms across his chest and looked up at you with a stern pout.

Anyone else would have been ripped to shreds and had their brains removed and eaten for such a small action; but he simply sat there, pouting with his arms folded. Glaring at you.

His cold, dead, stare never even irked you anymore, and finding him staring at you in the middle of the night and gently stroking your face was far from unusual; but it was your time, now. Your turn.

You gently stroked his face, tracing all the little details that you cared so much for; that long nose and the line where his skullcap ended and his skin began. The little dot on his nose. The ring of black lipstick, the thin drawn eyebrows. The rings around his eyes with the slits down the middle, carved out of makeup.

He was certainly beautiful and striking to look at; you would never be able to deny that, as even when he was unwell and sick, snot clinging to the tip of his nose and phlegm at the back of his throat, he was still beautiful.

"I'll stay up all night if I have to," you mused kindly, a complete distinction to him. It was a wonder you were ever so close. "I can stay up with you."

Art shook his head, the dribble of snot flapping around from the edge of his nose; he was telling you not to bother, he even scowled and snarled at the thought of you losing sleep. No, no, no.

"It's not a worry," you told him. "Honestly. It's one night, and if it helps you to get better, then I really don't mind."

Art couldn't be bothered to argue, so with a heavy thump of his hand, he grabbed the television remote and turned the volume up a bit more; might as well see if the drama of rich, old timey, English people was better than his usual method of keeping himself entertained.

He doubted it.

hi! thank you so much for reading! if you'd be so kind, I'd like to take just a few more moments of your time. the Baalousha family need funds in order to secure the survival of themselves, but especially their two very small children; they have nothing left in Gaza, and with their home destroyed by Israeli bombs, they are desperate for money to continue to stay alive. so far, they have raised €20739 of their €52000 goal, so if you could spread their story and their fundraiser and even donate, then please, please do.

[monimccoythings]

For Better or Worse

Third part of The Way We Were Saga. This is from Reader's point of view. Getting ready for the fatal encounter, maybe a chapter more.

Word Count: 1547

Tags: angst, past abusive relationship, alcoholism, violence, blood, past toxic relationship, f!reader.

Part I, Part II

Loving someone like Logan was an arduous task. Yet you still gladly did it. Because you knew that under all that brooding, all that snark and anger, laid a vulnerable heart just wishing to be cared for.

It wasn't hard to be attracted to Logan, you just had to take a look at those huge veiny arms, and all common sense went through the window. But to actually fall in love with him, to slowly tear down the walls he had spent centuries meticulously building, was as hard as it was worth it.

You had always loved him with your entire self, you had given your all without complaining. And you knew he loved you as much in return, even if he didn't know who to properly express it.

The day you gave the 'I do' to each other, was actually one of the happiest in your entire life. You had been married to the most wonderful man to ever walk this earth. And you made sure to tell him so, loving the way his cheeks were suddenly tinted pink.

You were the one to encourage him to join the X-Men, knowing that being around people who were like him and could help him understand his gifts would do him so much good. You liked them, from the very beginning they had been nothing but kind to you, despite you being a human. You knew they would take good care of Logan when you couldn't.

Logan was too proud to admit it, but you knew that deep down he appreciated them as well. Even if he refused to go out there dressed up like a 'Mustard clown' as he called his suit. Sometimes, Logan's pride got the best of him and sneaked out from the mansion, just to go out for a drink with his lovely wife.

Then, one day, everything went to hell.

He had run off again to you, trying to act like the though lone wolf he thought he was. They had called him. Several times, but he refused every single one of those calls.

Until the phone stopped ringing.

When he returned, the only thing he found was death. His friends and colleages' corpses, along those of the students were scattered across the entire mansion. He had been too late.

He lost control.

The guilt and self hate drove him into a downward spiral. Each night you stayed awake , with your heart in your throath, waiting for him to come back home covered in blood and reeking of whiskey. Sometimes you had to drive wherever he was passed out and drag his nearly 500 pound body towards your truck until you felt like you were going to pass out. Other times, he disappeared for days, even weeks, only to come back and act like nothing had happenned. Those were the worst, as you silently waited near the radio for some knews saying he had been found dead or something much worse.

You so desperately wanted to help him heal. If only he trusted you like before.

Logan didn't talk to you at all. Whenever you tried to start a conversation with him, he just grunted in dismissal, and if you tried to push your luck and try to help him open up to you he would smash the bottle he was currently holding against the nearest surface, or tear anything with his claws, making you wince.

You knew he would never hurt you.

You dreaded to think that one day there could be a 'yet' following that statement.

Sometimes you thought he blamed you for him being away that night. You could feel it in the way he made love to you, if that could be called making love. It was rough, animalistic, lacking any affection or emotion.

Yet you continued to support and take care of him, because you loved him and knew he was grieving; ignoring the fact of you were also drowning in your own grief, they had also been your friends, your family, and to think they had found such tragic endings made you lose hope on humankind.

But what really tore your heart was watching your husband self destruct. After months, quietly swallowing your own pain and tears, you found your last straw in a stormy at that dive bar on the road.

You begged him to stop hurting himself so much, you cried, screamed, finally letting out those feelings you had been repressing for so long. You couldn't just stand there and watching him destroy himself.

Apparently, that was the last straw for him as well.

When you felt his claws on your neck, you realised this was no longer the man you had married. A stranger had taken his place.

When he left you, in the middle of the rain, you sank to your knees and cried, actually sobbed your heart out. Completely numb to the cold or the dirt that covered your pijamas. You didn't know that your troubles had just begun.

A couple of weeks later you found those two dreaded lines on the pregnancy test. You cried again, cried tears you didn't know you had left, you cried to the point that your own sorrow would swallow you whole. But this time, those feelings of self pity were short lived. There was a growing life inside you, a tiny life who didn't deserve all the misery and hurt you had endured.

A switch had been flipped in you.

You needed to take action.

Back home, your husband's nefarious reputation had broken havoc in your life. You knew what they called you 'The Bride of the Wolverine', 'The Mistress of the Monster', people looked at you with disgust clearly etched into their faces, someone even insulted you when you walked down the street. Back at your hospital, they had decided to lay you off for 'classified circunstances' as they had called. It would be a matter of days before they kicked you out of the apartment too.

Swallowing your pride, you packed up what little you had left and moved to another place, away from all the pain and suffering. Like hell you were going to allow your kid to go through this too.

Your new neighborhood wasn't exactly the Hamptons, but it was discreet and allowed you and your growing belly to pass unnoticed. A rundown clinic at the end of the street was not exactly the job of your dreams, but at least it would pay the bills. Your child would never lack anything, not on your watch.

You worked hard. Harder than you remembered, taking multiple shifts and not stopping until your pregnancy made it impossible for you to move.

It was tiring doing the work of two all by yourself, it was exhausting and you had to admit that having to push in that baby without anyone to hold your hand or give you soothing words of comfort made you feel lonely than ever.

However, the second you were allowed to hold the little bundle that you had taken nearly six hours to push out of your body, whatever remaining grief in your heart dissipated.

She was perfect. Your little Ava. She was so small, so delicate. You knew from the first moment you saw her you'd never let anything harm her, ever.

Ava grew up happily, she was optimistic, curious and joyful. She loved ice cream, fries, animals and Monster High. There were no signs of the mutant gene on her, eventhough it was still to early for it to manifest. Not that you'd love her any less. But the less features she took from Logan, the better. Who knew what those people could if they found out the infamous Wolverine had reproduced.

And who knew what Logan would do if he ever found out. Maybe the Logan you married would had been esctatic, though would try to hide it under his 'cool guy' persona. It didn't matter because, that Logan was long gone and you had serious doubts he'd ever return.

So for nearly ten years you lived in peace. Or what could be considered as peace given your situation.

Still, fate found a way to screw you over. As always.

─────────────────────ⓧ─────────────────────

Blood ran cold in your veins. It was like watching the Ghost of Christmas Past suddenly appear before you.

He looked older, tired even. As if he had finally relieved himself of he huge weight he carried on his shoulders.

Why was he here? How had he found you? What did he want? Your arm shot backwards, trying as best as you could to shield your little girl from the man accross the street, desperately holding onto the hope that he hadn't seen her yet, despite his enhanced senses.

You quickly rushed her in, claiming to have forgotten something back home. You know you both will be late for school and work, but you didn't dare to get out if he was out there patrolling the streets.

As if this door was enough to stop him.

You peek through the window. For a couple of seconds you don't know what to expect. Would he still be there? Would he come after you? Did you want him to? Fortunately for you, he was gone, although that wasn't enough to calm your racing heart, because, deep down, you knew he had seen her. You had seen the way his eyes had slightly widened, the way his nostrils had flared, the way his mouth had opened slightly in disbelief.

He knew.

[areyoudreaminof]

Danse Macabre

Finally, it's here!

Vassa and Jurian find themselves at a standstill. Scythia has been overtaken by the remaining mortal queens, and contact has been lost with her remaining allies. In a last effort to gain human support in Prythian, Jurian and Vassa find themselves at a ball, hoping to make alliances before the death god comes knocking on their door.

This is a companion piece to my Elucien story, Hover Corte. I do suggest reading that first, as it is referenced throughout.

The wonderful @mossytrashcan created this piece of Jurian and Vassa for this fic, back when I published Hover Corte. It is so incredible, and I cried when I saw it. Thank you, Sage. ❤️‍🔥

Jurian swayed in the carriage, feeling every single bump and groove in the cobbled road. He gripped his knees, hoping it would steady him. It didn’t. Vassa sat across from him. Her small fists curled in her lap as she stared out the window. Her hair looked like a flame against her dark skin, and her eyes bluer against the dress she wore. A gown she had made with her own hands. The humans of Scythia were known for their weaving, even back then. He remembered. Gold threads created waves of grass and horses that darted across the hem. Elain mentioned Vassa had worked on it for weeks.

He tipped his head back against the fabric seat and closed his eyes, but the swaying seemed to get worse. He leaned forward, resting his forearms across his legs and hung his head between them. The metal wheels creaked violently as they turned another corner.

“I hate carriages.” Vassa said.

Jurian looked up, surprised she had spoken. Neither of them wanted to be here, in this carriage. They would have rather been at home, meddling and matchmaking. But they had received word that the mortal queens had conquered Scythia, sacking, and colonizing that vast empire. Beron was too quiet, and Lucien believed a coup would be imminent. Vassa’s time was running out, they had less than a year left if Elain’s estimation was correct. Vassa needed support to retake her homeland. If Beron managed to crown himself High King, the mortal lands of Prythian would be split among the remaining queens. So Vassa and Jurian now found themselves dressed like clowns to dance and galivant with nobility and beg for what they could get. The humans of Prythian had tolerated Jurian when Hybern invaded. However, the settling dust only caused more chaos. The merchants looted the vulnerable ports along the continent, while the sniveling nobles had attempted to crown Jurian as a puppet king. Jurian did not want to be a king. He had enough of fucking kings.

TAGLIST: @asnowfern @separatist-apologist @c-e-d-dreamer @damedechance @eyllweambassador @foundress0fnothing @goddess-aelin @itsthedoodle @kataravimes-of-the-shire @krem-has-a-mess @kingofsummer93 @lucienarcheron @melting-houses-of-gold @octobers-veryown @popjunkie42-blog @wilde-knight @reverie-tales @rosanna-writer @spell-cleavers @thesistersarcheron @thelovelymadone @the-lonelybarricade @ultadverb @vulpes-fennec @velidewrites @xtaketwox @writtenonreceipts @secret-third-thing @witch-and-her-witcher @hugeclearjellyfish @ofduskanddreams @gaeleria @labellefleur-sauvage @iftheshoef1tz @ablogofsapphicpanic @talons-and-teeth @foreverinelysian @acourtdelaluna @fieldofdaisiies @tuzna-pesma-snova @cursebrkr

[liverpool-enjoyer]

footballers as students

requested by @aechii!! thank you so much <3

leo: the Quiet Kid. does his work n keeps to himself n his two (2) friends that he sits between in class. somehow manages to avoid getting called on the entire year. when he does finally utter a single word everyone in class is like "HE SPEAKS!!!"

ney: as 1/3rd of msn hes literally never seen without the other two. never pays attention, is usually passing notes and/or throwing random pieces of paper at luis n leo.

luis: bit a few kids in elementary/middle school n still hasnt lived it down, even tho he claims hes changed. of msn hes the smartest, n manages to retain the information learned in class even though hes always playing into neys antics.

sergio: beefing with like, half the other students. once fought mo salah in the parking lot after school because he "gave luka a dirty look" (his words).

luka: fuckin TEACHERS PET. reminds the teacher to collect the homework if they forgot. hes also an overachiever n probly president a the student council or some shit. fuckin rory gilmore kinda aesthetic.

muller: he thinks hes the class clown, but lewys the only one who laughs at his jokes. (whats worse is lewy genuinely thinks theyre funny)

erling: the foreign exchange student that everyone thinks is "strong n silent," but actually jus hasnt fully grasped the english language yet

trent: every year him n robbo pull the most OUTLANDISH senior prank, despite not even being seniors. also participate in senior ditch day every fuckin year.

zlatan: hes far, far, too old to be in high school, but everyones too afraid to ask what hes still doing here. so there are jus the most wild ass rumors going around abt him (some of which include: him being a newly released prisoner, him being a foreign government agent, n him being an undercover cop)

gavi: the drama magnet. fuckin EVERY week its something new with him his life is essentially a euphoria plotline. skipped a grade in elementary school so hes younger than everybody else. hosts a huge end-of-year party only to kick everyone out early cause his parents will be rlly mad if they find out.

[deada55]

Kloktober 2024 day 24: fix him or make him worse

Nathan at the dentist say what?

“It’s just half an hour. Half an hour, and we’re good for the year.” Probably, unless he had a toothache that meant anything, then they’d have to fight this fight all over again. Rose and Oscar sat at either side of their son, trying to keep their bodies relaxed and cue relaxation, just like the psychologist said, while understanding that Nathan’s fists were tight enough to fuse together. He breathed through his mouth and locked eyes with a bobo doll in a little play alcove of toys, the leader of the laughing army of stupid clowns on the wallpaper. Rose and Oscar were used to loaded guns.

His parents were a little late to remember the peaceful, therapist-y way to coax him when he’d put them 45 minutes late from the start because he heard his mother confirm the appointment on the phone the day before. He wouldn’t get out of bed this morning for school, except to eat, then wouldn’t come out of his room dressed. From there, the day was melting into blank-faced madness. Rose and Nathan’s hair was snarled and frizzy from wrestling out of the car, which now had huge scratches in the leather headrests from Nathan using them as an anchor. An audience always changed how Nathan acted, and Rose and Oscar were glad to have company in the waiting room.

A dental hygienist came out in a pink scrub jacket. “Nathan Explosion?” She had a soft, light inflection on the end, and a smile painted in red-orange lipstick. Rose took Nathan’s right hand and left shoulder and stood up, and he did, too. Fabulous.

“Great job, honey. Let’s get it over with.

Oscar watched them follow the dental hygienist through the door and down a little hallway before the door closed. He watched the soap playing on the tiny TV mounted in the corner, then Rose came out, sweating, with two thumbs-up. “They put the uh, the x-ray vest on. He looks good. He let me go.” She threw herself down in a chair beside Oscar to catch her breath. “They were really understanding. I think. If this goes well, maybe we can get him his flu shot in a couple weeks—“

Oscar chuckled and put a hand around Rose. “We’ll see how he feels.”

They shared a sigh. Another child, a smaller child, cried somewhere in the maze of rooms. Then, a grown woman was shrieking, a man was cursing, and a tangle of doors open and shut. Nathan came sprinting through the door, still in the paper bib, a suction device stuck in his clenched teeth, and blew past every single thing in that room to the parking lot. The hygienist in pink burst through after him, but being half wet made her slip on her wet shoe, and she fell straight to the floor, flat and straight as a board. Her head flew black, she bit through her tongue. She laid where she fell and moaned. The dentist was hurrying behind her, but froze in his place when she didn’t move. He looked at Rose and Oscar, astonished onlookers, and said, “I think you should leave.”

[worldsbiggestnerd101]

i will forever be grateful that the mascot horror of my choosing - welcome home - is not a video game or even a show, but is, in fact, an interactive website with many secret elements that hide the horror. look what happened to fnaf, to tadc, hell, even poppy playtime now that chapter 3 isn’t complete and utter sludge. like, can you imagine how much worse the welcome home fandom would be if we also had over saturated content farms to deal with?

i was into tadc for a week or two (hyperfixation go brrrrr) and part of the reason i lost interest was because of the fucking content farms. tadc isn’t just an indie animated show with horror elements now, it’s something content farms milk to hell and back! i’ve found my little siblings watching shitty tadc content farm videos! can you imagine what would’ve happened if welcome home was executed in any other format other than its current website? the characters are perfect in terms of color and designs for content farm exploitation. it would’ve absolutely wrecked welcome home as a whole and it would’ve never taken off in the way it did if it’d been in a game or show or anything other than its website.

i keep going back to tadc but it’s just the perfect example of content-farm-ification. tadc lost relevance after, what, a month? sure, it’ll likely skyrocket back up into tumblr’s trending whenever episode 2 drops, but compare tadc’s 40k tag followers to welcome home’s ever climbing 1.2 million tag followers. the welcome home tag absolutely just blew up and kept blowing up after its initial rise to fame in march 2023, but tadc’s tag is still similar in followers to the number it had back in october. i blame it on the fucking content farms. sure, tadc has millions of views of youtube, but how relevant is it really?

sure, the welcome home fandom is generally regarded as shitty thanks to all the fucking idiots who couldn’t listen to clown’s guidelines on nsfw content for the few months before they created a tag for that specifically and because of all the weird as fuck aus people have created, but at least we’re not that. at least we don’t have content farms like fucking lankybox completely sucking the enjoyment out of our media of choice and over saturating the search results we get when looking up the names of our hyperfixes.

i cannot stress enough how grateful i am that welcome home’s main way of being interacted with is its website. lankybox and all other content farms can’t milk that. what small child would want to watch them aimlessly click around the website and try to find all the secrets? how is that marketable? how can you make putting in letter combinations into the url and clicking on everything pops up something to scream at your camera about? answer: you can’t. that’s what’s so great about it. there is almost no possible way anyone under age, what, ten? would want to watch someone interact with the website and uncover its lore which makes it practically useless to every single content farm out there.

so, yeah. once again, thank you clown for making your funny little puppet show horror project a silly website with its own secrets and codes rather than a video game. thank you for executing mascot horror in such a great way that content farms have simply not found a way to milk it in the almost year since its initial explosion in popularity. don’t forget to wave up high!

[greatbigbellies]

Do you have a favorite Poorks OC?

(If you're in the preg kink circle and somehow don't know of @poorks go check them out and view their character post or this wall of text is going to be very confusing...) It is super hard to like... nail down just one of Poorks' character as like an absolute favorite... There's a degree to which I like every single one of them, but I do have some that I'd rank particularly S tier for being really appealing.

Lorenzo has been one of my favorites dating back to when I first started this blog and thus first started following Poorks. He's quite popular already so I don't feel like it's much of a surprise that he's here but he's a great mix of "my type" when it comes to guys, and being typically written as someone who really enjoys being pregnant, which I find fun. He's also usually in a university/college setting, and as much as I know that setting can be overdone sometimes, I still like it. The tension of your due date being on finals week will always be classic Situation™. He also routinely gets huge so like... pop off king.

Saki is great, every time she pops up I'm happy to see her. Always ripping her dresses with her size and generally being gorgeous. She's just the kind of woman I'd want to step on me and honestly sometimes that's all you need.

Suyin, on the other hand, is another favorite that has more to her. She fucking sucks and I love her for it. I say with all the fondness in the world that I think if we got intimate, I'd come away from it with some kind of disease... and I'd happily get it treated and knock on her door for round two. She's a great example of "so many red flags that you just kind of HAVE to go for it anyway". Like, there's no fixing her, and you probably can't make her "worse" because she's already bottom of the barrel /fond. She's just kinda stinky and terrible and would probably dox me for laughs and like... in a fantasy way, that's pretty hot. Also just... good atypical trans lady rep, thank god.

Sem is a newer boy and I'm glad he's getting what feels like a lot of art. He's always BIG, and is always dressed in the best revealing outfits. Fishnets on a pregnant person is so underutilized. He's also got a kissable face. I dunno. He just looks like the kinda guy I should be gentle with? I'm unsure of how else to describe the vibes.

Polly is Polly. They're the pregnancy fetish clown. Their uterus is described as a clown car in function. Like... they're the kind of character you can't really sell to someone, they either already like them or they don't. I'm in the "like them" camp. They're huge but also clearly flexible and if they were ever animated, I'd just imagine they'd be very "bouncy" (and I dont even mean that in a strictly 'boob-centric' definition). Sometimes it comes down to good character design and this is one of those times.

I could gush about all of them in one way or another but like, this is already pretty long. Honorable mentions go to Takeshi, Yvette, Aurora, and Manju, who I am especially excited to see more content of since she's so new!

[bengiyo]

Be My Favorite Ep 7 Stray Thoughts

I barely remember last week because I was so put off by Kawi’s mom using her queer employees to surveil her own son. Kawi managed to get Pear’s (hopefully not alcoholic) father to take care of his dad, and managed to reconcile with Pear about running out. He also reconciled with Pisaeng for being mad that he was just trying to help. Kawi also drunkenly kissed Pisaeng, but at least feels safe enough around him now to let Pisaeng change him and fall asleep in his bed. Pisaeng also heard Kawi mumbling about being a time traveler in his sleep.  

I like Pisaeng a lot. I like how he’s building a regular friendship with Kawi, and not letting Kawi spin out about the drunken kiss.

Max is a real one. He got a single text about the surgery and immediately replied that he was heading to the hospital after work.

Oh, man. So Kawi only message Max. Pisaeng arrived on his own, was asked to stay, and messaged Pear. Pear opted not to go because she feels like she’d be unhelpful. CRUSHED.

I’m really enjoying the time travel plot, because there’s something absolutely incredible about him thinking he’d solved all of his problems and then failing to return to the present.

Never mind. Clowned on instantly and now we’re missing Pisaeng context.

I’m sure they’re going to make me unhappy about the present, but Max looks good so I’m going to take what I can get.

Well, it wouldn’t be a GMMTV project without a whole singing number.

Max is not amused with Kawi these days.

His hands shake when he doesn’t drink? Um...sir…

Oh, time travel. Kawi not being able to save his dad is going to hurt me.

Pear is marrying Not? I hope he got better.

Interesting. Kawi is getting flashes in the present to remember some moments in the timeline.

Damn, does everyone know that Kawi is an alcoholic now?

Oh, good. Kwan is around. Please tell us wtf is going on.

Oh, no. Is Kwan crying about Not?

She is crying about Not! Come on, girl.

PEAR IS PREGNANT! PAIN!!

This fight is fascinating. Kawi as an entertainer can’t be publicly attached to someone. Wonder how many of the GMMTV actors and talents feel bitter about that, especially with the harassment their partners have received over the years.

I’m with Max. You should protect other gays from “straight” boys who keep playing with their feelings.

Okay, I really hate Pisaeng’s travel trailer. Why is the door not under the awning? This is terrible for sheltering against rain.

The camera crew said, “Yeah, we’re not getting in that water with them.”

Gawin has a great smile.

Okay, the interior layout of the trailer is fine, but where is Pisaeng’s truck? How did he even get this here, and where does he go for supplies?

It feels like Pisaeng has severed ties with his mom, but I feel kinda sad that he’s living as a hermit.

Okay, Kawi, you’re gonna have to stop kissing this man.

I feel personally attacked by Pisaeng for holding onto these feelings for so long.

Oh, lord. Now he’s gonna head back and date Pisaeng?? Y’all.

This episode was sad. Kawi is a drunk who has ruined every relationship in his life. Everyone he cares about seems to have had worse outcomes for their association with him. Only Pisaeng seemed moderately okay, but he seems like he’s chosen his own form of isolation. We need to get back to the past, Samurai Jack!!

[pokidot]

EVERYBODY F**KING DIES! 💥 — childe's loveshack (derogatory)

Y/N - You were almost too dumb to be a victim of anything. It was why you got a hamster from some guy who was chilling in an alleyway, about to die from lupus or something (you admitted him to the hospital, but you never really found out if he was alive or not). You went to college for culinary purposes to prove to your mom that you had supreme Chad energy, but you were out-Chadded and saddled with the inglorious task of being the class dishwasher. To etch the further pain in your skin like salt in the wound, you best friend often laughs at you for it.

CHILDE - Local promising kid goes dark, happily jumps into the loving arms of trying to become a famous YouTuber who does gym workouts and weight checks (do you know anybody like that who's famous?), started going by three names, and then starts coming out delusional. Man completely dropped out of school as soon as he realized he was destined for something bigger. Better. But not smarter. He has moments of genius, probably when the rain and fog clears out from his head but I guess you need more than two functioning brain cells for that to happen from him. You were probably the only one who enabled him other than his family.

LUMINE - She has been the employee of the month for the local chicken shop every single month. Even though she reigned in the idea that she was the best worker there, she knew it was only because nobody was delusional enough to stay there for more than three weeks. It had horrible management, and the walls were so thin in between the front and the kitchen that you can hear the cooks threaten each other in the back. Weird shit happens in this time, but it's not about to ruin her day, who has time to worry about that when she keeps getting compared to the KFC worker Noelle? She'll show her.

ZHONGLI - In terms of ranking, it seems that Zhongli is definitely one of the most naive out of the entire group. He was one of the members of a charity organizations in Liyue a while back to add to his resume, but it ended up being a cult organization he got brainwashed in. You've put your foot in your mouth every single time you jinxed his happenings, and you feel bad about it now, so you often stay near him just to make sure he didn't get swept away. There was a point where he blew up because he looked like some person who used to be on Toddlers and Tiaras who disappeared from the Internet, and ever since then, he was verified on all platforms on happenstance. No matter how much anybody tries to clear up the mistake, it just got worse. Who knew people liked Toddlers and Tiaras that much?

KUNI - His life is a bit of a shit show (edit: a lot of a shit show), so the closest thing he has going for him is making sure Childe is actively being targeted by him. Unlike a ray of sunshine, every time he's around the ginger, it was like opening up Pandora's Box. The box being whatever asinine sentence was going to come out of his mouth. He's one grade under A from being a slab of meat in his mother's kitchen, and he's so close to having his Joker arc that it isn't even funny, but every day he wakes up and puts on that metaphorical clown costume to say 'not today'. You swear you were a bit omnipresent the next time he approached you to help you study, because the very next day you were dreaming about him. And not in the good way, to say the least. This isn't to say you get bad vibes from him, it was just odd.

prev | masterlist | next

[galacticfire]

🎫📰

🎫 You can make one rider change teams this transfer season. Who do you choose and where does (s)he go?

Wout van Aert clown emoji

Okay so. This has been a long standing stance of mine. OBVIOUSLY IT'S NOT HAPPENING. But nothing has ever made me as mad as jumbo wout. For the record I think he should've never been in a GC focused team and that he's good enough to get a dedicated team for every single race he chooses to target, be it 1 day races, one week races or even grand tours for stage wins / jerseys etc. Does he still get a lot of opportunities especially regarding the depth of the visma roster? Yes. Should he get more. Well Yes. These tdf stage wins are all nice and shit but I'm sure he would trade all of them for another monument win. likeeeee idk how you think you can adequately target your (classics) objectives when you're always peaking altitude camping to be a domestique at the tour or wtv. It's even worse that he actually complained about this shit (and this is why he was supposed to go to the giro this year. LOL about that anyways.) but yet he's signing a fucking forever till death do us par contract with them............... whatever. When i was losing my shit about it in 2023 I'm pretty sure I made a full list of WT teams and where he should and should not go. Atp I was all in for a Bora move before rogla moved but I still think that would've been viable. Soooooo maybe that. Also controversial opinion but I think quickstep would work well too :'/ good classics support. remco kinda keeps to his own shit and has beef with cobbled classics. just don't free landa.

Anyways because of the forever contract I should be going around it. Maybe I want Jonas to move teams. and go to idk trek to make the danes happy idgaf

then i deal with my enemy ********** ******* and send him to bardiani or something.

I know this says one rider but this is a way to circumvent my jumbo wout problem :'/

📰 Where do you get your cycling news or rumors?

like. everywhere?? all my socmed TLs are full of cycling, riders, teams, a bit of journos and sports news sites. never trust a single twitter account that isn't a journalist known for giving accurate news btw because most of these guys are atrocious. and i also lurk on forums like That One French Forum with the yellow logo to get news early.

and thank you for the asks!!

[necroplushhiko]

CW: trauma, abuse, substance misuse (codeine)

I've been finding myself reflecting on my past a lot this week. I don't know if it's just the change of scenery or an upcoming visit to my grandma's that has my brain pondering traumas of days gone by.

Today it's fixated on one point: I'll never know true darkness.

Now this isn't some emo/goth or drawn to serial killers thing. Yes I like black and goth things. I despise humanity's fixation/fetishisation of killers. This is more about the darkness you see when all the lights are off. I will never know such an emptiness or fear the night because even when I close my eyes at night or meditate in a dark room, I don't see nothingness. What I see resembles more of the starry void of space. I see sparkles. It's like staring with your nose pressed to the screen of a 50s TV set. It's as if I downloaded the early glitter effects used on Myspace to my eyeballs and it NEVER goes away.

I don't precisely know when it started. This could be down to trauma or could be simply blamed on the bedroom I was kept in for most of my childhood. (The wall paper looked like a clown had ate too much funfetti cake and threw up every where.) You see I went threw some shit as a kid. But I know that if I stare at glittery things or patterns with lots of dots, the sparkles I see all the time blend in and almost disappear. It's comforting like the relief you get when you take your shoes off after a long day. That's why I find glitter calming. You might find me in the dead of night, when I'm at my worse just painting things with glitter. It's also why I painted my bedroom ceiling with glittery white paint. For when my insomnia is high and I'm lay there looking up, the sparkles take the strain off my eyes and helps me go to sleep.

Until recently I didn't know this was a weird thing. I was never afraid of the dark as a child. Yeah my depth perception can suck and I can't play badminton or tenis but who cares. Sure I might not be able to read a book by a pool in the summer (because the white paper causes me pain) but I can't stay still that long anyway. I'd rather be walking through a forest or having an adventure on holiday anyway. (I'm perfectly capable of being a human sized slug at home thank you. I don't need to spend money to do that.) However my perception of the world is apparently not normal and I've been told that it's a sign of brain damage. Then I was just thrust back into the world knowing that I'm damaged, without knowing how badly or why. I don't know how to deal with this or what to do with this information. But I do know that I detest the sparkles now. I can't unsee it as yet another thing that makes me damaged and part of me wishes it would disappear. But that makes me feel sad. I can't imagine a world without the constant glittery background radiation. It still makes me unique but not in a good way.

Just another thing that makes me brain quirkier than most and it fills me with such sadness.

Why am I like this? Was it the abusive childhood? Was it one of the head traumas I've had and was never taken to hospital for? Was it the adult strength codeine I was force fed for pain as a child? I know the later made it worse. When I'd trip of codeine and the migraine meds I was given the sparkles would almost burn into my eyes. I could feel every single one of them sting my retinas and I'd lock myself away in dark rooms. It was like rubbing my eyes after handling chilli whilst soap was poured into them at the same time and the longer I stared the more intense it got. It's why when I was still medicated with (and addicted too) the codeine in my teens I had to wear tinted dark glasses all the time.

But now that I'm older and I'm free from all that, I don't get those same pains. Sure if I'm burnt out I'll need dark glasses and I detest white buildings but I'm OK.

I just wish I knew why but I never will.

[ahandfulofkeys]

Sunday, March 5, 2023 01:00 am

You know what I hate the most?

You turned me into the type of person I hated.

I hate having separation anxiety.

And I especially hate having FOMO.

I was perfectly fine, without hanging out with everyone, & just being home.

But your actions made me have FOMO.

And I wanna hate you for it.

I called you, earlier during the day, cause I felt like I was having separation anxiety from you & feeling FOMO cause I had shit to do & couldn't go out.

I've talked to you multiple times within the year about how your actions made me feel.

How I felt neglected, ignored, the last priority, an afterthought.

You "promised" to work on it. Yet, every single week, without fail, it's like you completely forgot what we talked about.

You said you're "still learning," but after 12 years? Is there any effort there? Am I not enough for you to put even an once of effort in? It feels like you put more effort into our friends, than our relationship. Do I matter so little, to you, compared to our friends?

I meant what I said when I didn't care about being your priority, but I HATE being an afterthought

I hate the feeling that our friends matter more, or the feeling of them being more important cause of "timing."

I fckn hate it. And I'm slowly starting to hate you because of it. And I hate that.

You really think, I'm mad cause you weren't answering your texts?

You think I'm mad cause you forgot your phone?

I'm mad because if I didn't text you, I wouldn't get ANYTHING from you.

I'm mad because you wouldn't even tell me anything, if I didn't text you first.

"I'm telling you now" Yeah, cause I got mad & stated it was a chapter I knew nothing about. But if I didn't text you, would you have even said anything?

If I didn't get mad, would you even pay attention? You were so "caught up in the moment."

I'm mad, because ONCE AGAIN, I was left as an afterthought.

An afterthought, because you were "in the moment."

An afterthought, because "the timing wasn't right."

Every time I do something, I text you. Cause in my mind "Oh Drew might be curious/worried" (😑 I'm really only clowning myself)

Worse part?

Getting brushed off, every single time, without fail. Getting 'I'm sorry' or 'I love you' and feeling like empty words.

I'm tired.

[acedragontrainer]

tumblr holidays really depend on what circles you choose to be in since most of them are fairly fandom specific, generally you celebrate holidays by having fun reblogging a bunch of memes about it, there’s also weekly memes you might grow fond of that celebrate different days of the week with a specific meme, you can also force your own into existence by aggressively creating content and dragging your three (3) followers into it with you

let’s start with weekly holidays, weekly holidays are usually one-note memes that may just depend on reblogging one post or variations of it on the same day of the week, there’s plenty of niche weekly holidays so i’ll just list some of my favorites, again it really just depends on if you’re following people that celebrate weekly holidays

out of touch thursday is, i think, the biggest one here, memes tend to be various characters dancing to the Hall & Oates song “Out of Touch”, the most common one is the lucky stars video

flat fuck friday, you post pictures of flat animals, classic

leave the bog tuesday (it’s safe to leave the bog tuesday)

fingers in his ass sunday, on the eve of the nsfw ban tumblr came together to mourn the loss of what was good by saluting the fingers in his ass meme like it was being publicly executed in the morning, reblog the fingers in his ass meme video, it’s an mmd of sans and komaeda dancing to the fingers in his ass song, a meme song making fun of kanye west

trans gender its friday, tgif stands for trans gender its friday

sfw sasuke saturday, reblog the sfw sasuke post

radical saturday, reblog the radical saturday post on friday (and sometimes sunday)

it’s wednesday my dudes, reblog the it’s wednesday my dudes vine post, alternatively reblog pictures of budgett frogs (fun fact, the vine dude is mimicking the budgett frog scream hence the frogs), i think there’s also a kpop version of this as well (i don’t know, i’m not in any kpop fandoms), and there’s a star trek ds9 variant as well (It’s weyounsday my dudes), and there’s a german specific frog one (es ist mittwoch meine kerle)

penis friday, apparently this used to be for dick pics before the Purge®, but now you just say “happy penis friday” and stop there

there’s many more but they’re so small and i don’t celebrate many of them, so moving onto major holidays, we’re going to start with general tumblr ones that you’re probably going to see regardless of fandom space, i’m not going in any particular order, just listing them as they come to me

the ides of march, march 15 we celebrate the assassination of historical figure Julius Caesar, reblog memes, post strings of emoji knives, clown on roman senators

neil banging out the tunes anniversary, some memes have dates attached to them so we collectively celebrate the anniversary every year, tumblr loves anniversaries, the neil banging out the tunes meme is a picture of a hairless rat and a toy piano labeled “Neil banging out the tunes April 13, 2006″, also! neil recently won the tumblr president election, congratulations neil 🎉

Nov. 5, also known as the anniversary of destielputinelection day, on november 5th 2020 the votes are being counted for the us presidential election (trump v biden), we’re in the 3rdish wave of covid and everybody has to go back into lockdown, the counting has stalled because nevada is being slow as fuck and its so close that it could literally decide the outcome of the election, georgia and pennsylvania have turned blue (historically these states almost always vote red), on the same day the season finale of supernatural (one of the big 3 in 2012 era, inescapable, even if you never watched a single second of this 15 season long series, you still know the main characters and some basic lore) airs and destiel goes canon after 15 goddamn years of queerbaiting (this was the show that defined queerbaiting in modern television, but teenwolf somehow did it worse) in the most homophobic way possible (angel says he’s gay and gets absolutely nothing from the other dude and then is immediately sent to super hell after crying about how happy he is for admitting his sad as fuck one sided love, proceeds to never show up again even though everybody else including the car gets to go to heaven), destiel trended so hard you had major news outlets confusedly trying to explain fandom terms to normies, this kicks off a massive fandom revival, people who haven’t touched tumblr in years are logging back in just to revel in the sheer disbelief and anger brought on by this bullshit, supernatural memes are used to inform people about the sudden rumors of putin’s resignation, updates on the us election are being spread purely through supernatural shitposts, getting swept up in the flood of absurdidity more fandom news gets spread through supernatural shitposts: touya is dabi, bbc sherlock season 5, new season of ouran high school host club, hetalia is coming back, the energy that day was the closest this website has come to 2012 energy in years, it was great, this event is the reason big political news gets shared on this site in supernatural meme format, nov. 5th rubbed our brains so good we celebrate it every year in remembrance, this video sums it up pretty well

October 1st, halloween starts on october 1st here, tumblr is the site full of people who put their decorations up a month early, hell halloween posting starts two months early for me, reblog classic halloween posts like spooky scary skeletons remix (couldn’t find the post), dancing pumpkin guy, the heartfelt halloween comic, australians are confused about spirit of halloween stores, time to get spooky, spoopy, almos halloween, dancing skeletons animation, ghost duet, any time of the year halloween post, halloween cat comic, skeleton war memes, anything about the nightmare before christmas (theres so many memorable posts bc we celebrate halloween for two months)

thursday the 20th, reblog this simpsons picture of a guy with a necklace that says thursday the 20th, this one is fun because a thursday the 20th only comes around once or twice a year and if you want to celebrate on the right day then you have to look at a calender to track down the next one and queue it for the right day

it’s gonna be may, reblog gifs of nsync with the phrase “it’s gonna be may”, this lasts through all of april

havent seen this one in a few years but Apr. 22 is earth day, so we celebrate earth’s birthday

July 11 dashcon memorial, for those of you who are new here, tumblr used to be big enough and community driven enough that we all floated the idea of making a tumblr con and... it happened, sort of, it’s famous for being a giant fucking shitshow, here’s a great video explaining what happened, just past around the ballpit post and bemoan how tumblr just doesn’t make scandals like they used to

pride month be gay do crime, june is pride month and tumblr is very queer, just remember kids after june is wrath (also known as disability pride month), bisexual awareness week is sep 16–23, transgender awareness week is nov 13 – 19, ace week is oct 23-29,  aromantic spectrum awareness week is feb 19 - 25,  non-binary awareness week is july 14-21, lesbian visibility week is apr 24 - 30, there’s a lot more of these but i’m not going to go through and list every single one, check out the wiki list, (i did not check if any of these change year to year so don’t quote me on it)

March 23, Happy Evergiven Blocks Maritime Commerce Day, i know it’s fallen out of the collective consiousness but i’ve seen a few people celebrate

eurovision starts in early may, this one is usually much bigger outside of the us, in case you don’t know this is an international song competition and the us isn’t allowed (thank god) but australia is, the spectacle, the camp, the performance, the setting things on fire, the bisexual sluttiness, the petty infighting and historical drama, the big 5 absolutely not deserving their auto qualification, i will strangle the jurors personally, if i hear one more song in english i will explode, nobody likes ballads, the country that took the f and did the meme song this year will live on in my heart

remember the 21st of september, reblog earth, wind & fire’s “the 21st night of September”, this is another one you’re probabing going to queue yearly

this isn’t a strict holiday but anytime a major political figure dies we celebrate and spread the information through dancing crab memes and supernatural memes, waking up to a dashboard full of crabs and megamind memes when the queen of england died was something ✨special✨

kinktober/flufftober/inktober, in october there’s a bunch of month long prompt events that encourage people of any fandoms to fill daily prompts by writing/drawing, some fandoms also have their own unoffical yearly prompt events outside of october as well, if the fandom is big enough there may also be ship or character specific events

in the same vein, nanowrimo starts nov. 1, nanowrimo is a challenge to write 50,000 words of a novel (we write fanfic here) in thirty days, not often do we succeed but its fun to try and suffer

mar. 14 (3.14) is pi day, post pictures of pi or the number pi, maybe both if you're feeling funky

fandom specific holidays, some fandoms *coughcoughsupernatural* are so omnipresent that you can’t get out of them, but largely you’re not going to see fandom specific holidays if you avoid that fandom

mishapocalypse, if you’re new here then you don’t understand the stranglehold superwholock had on tumblr, you couldn’t go five posts without a supernatural gif, on April 1st 2013 swathes of bloggers changed their avatars to this picture of supernatural actor misha collins‘ face, they put his face on every meme, gif, photo they posted, everything was misha, you can’t image the impact of logging on just to see this face on everything, just your entire dash, there’s still a few souls out there who celebrate, but it just doesn’t have the same je ne sais quoi as 2012 era tumblr did

dannypocalypse, this danny phantom specific holiday is the spiritual successor to mishapocalypse, April 3 everybody posts this one specific picture of danny’s face on everything and anything, the phandom is still going strong, they just got smaller and weirder (affectionate)

on october 3rd we wear pink, in the movie aaron sits by cady and asks her what day it is on october 3 so we reblog the gif of her saying “it’s october 3rd”

anti valentines day, that’s not an official name or anything and this isn’t a fandom per se, but it’s also not widespread enough to be a general holiday, every year on feb. 14th the arospec community positivity posts and makes aspec memes to the point that aro/aromantic/arospec is trending on valentines day, less than a week later arospec awareness week kicks off so it’s great timing

may the 4th be with you, star wars day, big day for star wars fandom, there are memes, following two days later is the lesser known revenge of the sixth, small fandom rush of content for a few days

June 5th/6th is les mis barricade day, small fandom rush of content, everybody makes les mis memes

don't forget 3.Oct.11, significant date in fullmetal alchemist: brotherhood, reblog posts with the pocket watch

leif erikson day on Oct. 9 (it’s extra special on friday), reblog clip of spongebob saying “hey everybody it’s leif erikson day! hingabingaburgen”

annoy squidward day is jan/feb 15, post the screenshot of spongebob pointing at annoy squidward day on the calendar

oct. 13 is technically parks and rec’s treat yo self day, but the meme is so prevelent outside of that that it’s usually not celebrated on a specific day for most people, like yolo but for buying stupid things that make you happy

the met gala is the first monday of may, viciously mock celebrites on their inability to understand camp, share pictures of your favorite outfits, fall into despair after learning how much money was spent on dogshit designing, get angry about yet another dude showing up in a basic ass black suit and tie

MAR10, march 10th is mario day, to be honest this one is pretty corperate so it rubs me the wrong way, apart from that fandom uses it for a small rush of content

this isn’t really a fandom but in the us towards the begining of october highschoolers across the country take the SAT (standardized testing for college admission) and every year they have to read and analyze a different set of short stories, so every year they go home after taking the test and meme about the short stories for a week, this one is pretty small but every once in a while it escapes containment and you get memes about classic short stories randomly spreading through the wider tumblr ecosystem

obviously there’s more but i’ve only touched these circles enough to remember them

hi tumblr ppl! im having a lot of fun on here but ive heard that the ides of march is today and im not really sure how tumblr traditions/holidays work and how many there are ?? if someone can provide a masterlist and what ppl do on each holiday that would be very nice thank you :)

[bananami]

LEAVE YOUR BOYFRIEND

character/s: eren jaeger x afab!reader

SYNOPSIS: eren isn’t very happy to sit back and watch his best friend, who he is very much in love with, date another man. everyone has there breaking point, you were his. (4.2k)

WARNINGS: 18+/mdni, cheating (not on reader or eren), slight angst, praise kink, fingering, penetrative sex, no condom (remember to wrap it up y’all), heavy cursing, a little bit of soft eren mixed with simp eren, some mean eren sprinkled in there, a dash of pining, mocking, technical exhibitionism, some degradation, i hope i don’t miss anything

A/N: i seriously don’t remember sitting down to write this, also eren finds literally any and every way to insult your boyfriend

It was pretty obvious to everyone around you how awful your boyfriend was. The problem was that you were just too forgiving of a person. It irked every single one of your friends how he took advantage of you and your never ending kindness, but there was one person it pissed off the most.

Eren hated the guy. Ever since you’d introduced him, the little shit had always rubbed your best friend the wrong way. It just got worse the more he fucked you over. At first it was small stuff, things that you easily brushed off and Eren could only roll his eyes at and make snide comments. Like canceling plans last minute even though you had taken damn near an hour to get ready and looked so good Eren couldn’t help but think about what would happen if he were to bend you over the countertop, rip off your panties, and suck on your little clit until you were pushing his head away because - can’t, ngh, Er-Eren, too much.

Or the time when you were all hanging out at his and Armin’s party and your asshole of a boyfriend had up and left without even telling you, claiming he wasn’t feeling good and didn’t wanna spoil your fun. Only for you to find out through Connie that he’d shown up at their frat party later that night high as hell. Eren had seen how ruined your mood was after that and had offered to drive you to classes in the morning and told you you were welcome to stay the night. You two had a lab together later that day anyways and he could take you home after. But fuck if he didn’t think about how you would ask to wear some of his clothes to bed. And how good you would look in his sweatshirt and those tight little athletic shorts you’d worn. You’d thanked him for being such a good friend and slept in the guest room right next to his. And no Eren is definitely not a good friend because a good friend wouldn’t think about how fucking fantastic your ass looks in those shorts, a good friend wouldn’t wonder what kinds of little sounds you would make and what you would taste like if he kissed you - shoved his tongue in that innocent little mouth of yours and gripped the back of your neck to hold you to him until you were so dizzy from the lack of oxygen that you could barely stand it. And a good friend definitely, definitely, did not fuck his hand in the room right next door to you while imagining it was your tight little cunt milking him, begging you - pleading with you - to cum, cum all over my cock baby, all yours, all fucking yours-

It was ridiculous, absolutely fucking absurd that Eren had to watch this clown apologize time after time only for you to fall for his bullshit and take him right back. He didn’t deserve you, fuck if Eren did either - in fact he firmly believes he doesn’t - but he knew that at least if you were his he would make you a top priority and not bullshit around like the slime you were dating now. But he’s not. Dating you that is. And yet you’re still a top priority to him.

So much so that when you go out with Mikasa and Jean every week he tells you to make sure you text him if you need a ride, or if Jean drops you off at your house to make sure that you text him and let him know you’re safe, and he calls you when he’s at the grocery store because he knows that you’re dumbass always forgets at least one thing, or why he orders an extra thing of fries when you guys go out because it doesn’t matter what you say, you’re going to want some of his fries. It’s why when you call him at three in the morning balling your eyes out because your boyfriend made plans on your birthday weekend to go out with a bunch of his friends, he’s over at your place in less than fifteen minutes.

Armin likes to call him a simp when you ask Eren to do something for you and he doesn’t even hesitate, because you know what he is a fucking simp and Armin can suck his ass. He didn’t care what everyone thought, just you. And if him letting you steal his favorite band t shirts and driving around at 3 am blasting music and staying up late watching horror movies makes you happy then you won’t hear a peep out of him.

The straw that really breaks the camel's back comes on a random weekend at his place. Armin was going somewhere for the whole weekend with Connie and when you found out you felt bad about Eren being alone so you offered to stay with him. As innocent as the request was, Eren was now fighting for his life every other moment of the day as he watched you help him clean his house and walk around after showering in just his t shirt and your hair all tied up in a towel, legs on full display, and now cooking for him after telling him to just go sit down and relax and let someone take care of him for once - something no one has ever said to him before. It was all so domestic that he could feel himself clenching to keep from getting hard. At one point during the day he had to run to the bathroom to pump one out as quickly as he could because you’d simply leaned over to get the laundry out of the dryer. And just now he’d gotten half hard again, the image of you on your knees in front of him, tongue running up the base of his cock mumbling those same words lemme take care of you Eren, wanna take good care of you, want you to cum in my mouth, make you feel so good.

God, you’d be begging for him to hold the sides of your face and fuck your throat until it was sore and you were gagging and choking on his cum. And you’d touch yourself, dripping all over his carpet while he told you how fucking sweet you were, how much of a good girl you were to him, how your shitty little boyfriend couldn’t give you want you needed like he could.

At the thought of your boyfriend, Eren’s fantasies stopped. He couldn’t help himself from letting the words slip. “Too busy taking care of you since your boyfriend doesn’t seem to wanna do it.” He pauses and waits for your response, cringing at the fact that he just couldn’t keep his goddamn mouth shut and let sleeping dogs lie. You were in a relationship, you clearly liked this loser enough to continue to give him chance after chance.

But Eren never lied, not even in his fantasies, you were so sweet. You rarely got mad, so when Eren opened his big mouth and spilled the truth, you just sighed and gave him a sad smile. “I probably seem pretty pathetic, huh?”

To some people it did seem pathetic, but to Eren what was even more pathetic was the fact that he was sitting here fantasizing about someone who clearly did not want him the way he did them. If you were pathetic, then what the fuck was he? To that he muttered words that may have been more for himself than for you, “you’re not pathetic, you’re just in love.”

He wallows in self pity for just a moment. Your little shrug stops him, but it’s your response that makes his head reel. “I wouldn’t call it love. More like infatuation. Barely that anymore.”

It was more open than you’d ever been with him about how you really feel about your relationship. Eren was practically falling off the edge of his seat waiting for you to continue. Fuck, he really was pathetic because one little glimmer of hope and he was running right back, pining away at the idea that he there was still a chance he could seduce you away from that douchebag you called a boyfriend.

“Why stay with him then? The guy is a total fucking loser.”

He watches you ring and squeeze your hands together, a nervous tick he could always pinpoint. “Who else would ever want me?” That breaks his heart more than any fucking rejection from you ever could. He would rather you yell, fuck even laugh right in his fucking face at the possibility that someone like him could ever think they had a chance with someone like you than for you to ever even entertain the idea that someone other than that lowlife could never want you.

For a second he’s sad, but the more he thinks about it the angrier he gets. “Did he fucking tell you that? Is that why you stay with him?”

Your eyes get big, rimmed already with tears, and it pisses Eren off even more. Of course your shitty ass boyfriend would try and tell you you weren’t worth anyone else’s time, because how else would he keep you from leaving him.

“He- not exactly, he just said-“ You were a bit of a blubbering mess trying to get the words that just wouldn’t formulate in your brain to come out of your mouth.

“What the fuck did he say to you?” Eren tried to reign in his anger a little bit for the sake of calming you down. His hand reached out to pull you in between his legs as he moved to sit down on the couch. “Breathe, baby, breathe. I need you to stop crying and talk to me. What the fuck did he say to you?”

He waited patiently as you caught your breath, your eyes refusing to meet his. “It’s embarrassing.”

“I don’t care, I’m about five minutes away from finding your soon to be ex boyfriend and ringing his neck until his head pops like a water balloon.”

“That is graphic and unnecessary.”

“And you are refusing to answer my question.”

You huffed, and a strangled sound came from your throat. “It’s this, this is what he meant.” Gesturing between him and you, you still refused to meet his eyes.

“What is ‘this’ exactly?”

One of your hands yanked itself out of his to cover your face but he was quick to tighten his grip on the other. You were exuding a range of nervous energy and Eren was having a hard time remaining patient, wanting to know now what kind of shit your boyfriend had been spewing and why.

“I…” you barely feel him pull you closer to the edge of the couch, “he doesn’t like that you and I are so close.”

“Well he can take that up with me if he has such a fucking issue with it.”

Your hands jokingly cover his mouth and you scold him like you have a million times before. “Such a dirty mouth.” He wants to show you just how dirty of a mouth he has but that wasn’t exactly the point right now. Instead, he brushes a whisper of a kiss against your palm as he moves it away, moving it to rest against his shoulder.

“What would us being close have anything to do with no one else wanting you?” And as he says it, it’s like a lightbulb clicks on in his brain. Fuck wanting an answer, he needed one. Needed you to tell him exactly why your boyfriend would hate Eren being around you so much. Did he see Eren as a threat? Did you give him any reason to believe that Eren might be? Or did your boyfriend just see the way Eren stared at you with a longing for you to just open your eyes and fucking pick him instead.

It took you a few more seconds to compose yourself before you let out a shaky breath and speak so fast he barely catches all of it. “He was upset because I said your name while he was going down on me.”

Now the last thing Eren wanted to think about was your shitty little boyfriends head between your thighs, but the thought of you saying his own name instead? He was pretty sure his brain had stopped working. His head fell forward against your stomach and he closed his eyes to compose himself, the thoughts running through his mind going straight to his cock.

You, on the other hand, were freaking out. You weren’t sure that it was a good idea in the first place to tell Eren the truth about what had happened but he had been so persistent. There was always a part of you that believed maybe he felt a portion of what you felt for him, and your boyfriend had become very aware of that very quickly. You’d always made excuses, told him you and Eren were just friends. Then why is he always trying to hit you up and be around you all of the time? And why do you seem so ready to be at his beck and call? And what’s with all the inside jokes that only the two of you understand? And why do you look at him like that? And why do you think anyone else would ever want you like that?

“I’m sorry,” you begin to apologize, “I know it’s creepy and totally weird that I would think about you-“

You’re cut short when there’s a yank at your waist and suddenly you’re on the couch, knees spread and calves pushing against Eren’s thighs. He surprises you when he buries his face into your neck, hand on the other side of it, his thumb running along the bottom of your jaw and cheek, leaving opened mouthed kisses all along your neck. “Pretty baby had to think about my mouth to cum ‘cause her boyfriend couldn’t do the job? Must’ve been so fucking lost in that fantasy to say my name right in front of him, huh?”

You could barely breathe at how good his lips felt against your skin, the same fantasy from the other night flooding back into your head. He wanted to know exactly what it involved. “What’d you think about to get off, doll? Squeezing my head between those pretty thighs? Fuck, did you yank at my hair and try to grind your perfect little pussy against my face?” Eren stops assaulting your neck and grips your cheeks in one hand, forcing you to look him in the eye. “Did you think about the same things I do? Riding my face until you’re crying and squirming to get away?”

Eren’s hand quickly slips past your panties and against your clit where it rubs tight figure eights that make your breath catch and your eyes flutter. “Thought about you every single time.” His words are desperate, like he’s the one being teased, on the verge of one of the most mind blowing orgasms of his life. “Every time I fucked my fist,” the words made you jump, “thought about this sloppy cunt fucking me instead. Wanted to cum so deep inside you baby, wanted to split you open on my cock. Watch you get yourself off while you ride me. Cum for me, cum all over my fingers so I can taste it baby. Give me what I want. Let me see if you taste as good as you do in my fantasies.”

Two fingers sink into your heat and you're seeing stars as your lower stomach clenches and your legs shake. Eren’s thumb hasn’t left your clit and you feel a pressure build again.

“Please, Eren, please-“

“Please, Eren, please,” he mocks you, “you beg me in your dreams too, doll? Don’t worry sweet girl, I’m gonna do exactly what your boyfriend was afraid I would. Now cum again.”

That’s all it takes. Your brain is still a little fuzzy as you come down from your high, but you watch as Eren pulls his hand from your panties and sucks his fingers into his mouth. The sound he makes is that of a starving man finally feasting. “Better than I imagined.” He adds some pressure to the end that holds your cheeks and forces your mouth open. “You’ll take what I give you and be grateful. Keep your mouth open for me baby.” And suddenly his tongue is inside your mouth and you can taste yourself. His hand that isn’t holding your cheeks moves to your throat, not squeezing but just resting there, waiting for permission. You take his hand and add a bit of pressure, until you can hear the blood pumping in your ears. Eren’s mouth leaves yours before he releases the pressure on your neck, watching you gasp for air with almost a sadistic smile on his face.

“Did so good for me, so fucking proud of you, doll,” Eren guides your hand to the front of his sweatpants to show you just how hard you make him, dick practically twitching, “now be a good girl and show me how you take my cock.”

Your panties are off within seconds, Eren’s hand ripping them down your legs and tossing them across the living room. Eren makes a mental note of where they are to grab later, a little souvenir to prove what was happening was real and not just some fucked up fantasy his brain had conjured up. And if this was it, if this was just a one time thing - fuck, he hoped not - then at least he had something of yours to beat off with later. God, he really was pathetic. But for now you were real and spread out under him on his couch and he was going to make sure every second of it was burned into the back of his brain.

His hand grips your cheeks again, squeezing them so he can delve into your sweet little mouth again, missing your taste already. “Gonna fuck you like you deserve, baby. That what you want? Want me to fuck you dumb?”

He watches your face change as you begin to beg - “yes, please, want you” - and suddenly you’re a blubbering mess, his dick only halfway in and you’re already going cross-eyed. “Eren, too-too much.” 

Eren’s lower lip pulls out like he’s pouting and his voice comes out whinny and mocking again. “Oh baby, I know, I know. Too big for you tight little pussy. Be good, relax and let me make it fit. Thought you wanted me to fill you up? Don’t I deserve it?” He slides in little by little, rubbing your clit so slowly it makes you wanna cry. And judging by the tears beginning to form, you might just start.

“Made me wait so fucking long, had to watch you hang all over your little boyfriend, listen to you complain about how he can’t take of you. That’s all you want baby, just want someone - fuck - someone to take care of you.” His breath catches as he bottoms out, completely enraptured in you, hitting so deep he’s afraid it might actually be too much for you to take. But then you whine and grind down on him. His laugh is deep and teasing, and he pulls out and begins to thrust - long and deep ones that make the tears at the corner of your eyes begin to fall.

Eren’s lips come down on your neck, up your cheek to your lips where he whispers his vulgar adoration. “Only time I wanna see you cry is when you’re all choked up my cock, got it?” Your head shakes like you’re agreeing with him, small noises leaving your lips with every thrust of his hips. “Not over some fucking prick who can’t make you cum. Doesn’t” thrust “fucking” thrust “deserve you.”

Suddenly, the two of you are flipped, you on top and him sprawled underneath you. And somehow you feel him sink deeper into you. His thumb reaches up to brush the tears falling down your face. “Show me how much you wanted it to be me. Ride me, doll.”

Your hands lay flat on his chest are you move your hips against his. Hands grip your sides and pull you up and down, helping you out more and more the shakier your legs get. One hand reaches up again, this time stuffing two fingers between your lips.

“My baby getting a little too drunk on my cock?” His eyes flutter and he throws his head back as one particular thrust hits him just right. “Fuck, close baby. Tell me when your close, don’t think I can take that.”

Your head shakes and you mumble around his fingers, “inside.”

It takes him a second, his head far too cloudy from your pussy squeezing him so tight to register your words right away. But when he does, it’s like the snap of a rubber band. “Inside?”

“Want you to come inside me,” your voice is breathless and needy, something equal to the way it makes Eren feel. Like his heart is a split moment away from combusting inside his chest. “Never let anyone else, only you.”

Say fucking less.

Eren is close, so fucking close to release that it’s almost painful. And then the phone rings. At first you two ignore it. But then it rings again, and again, and again. And finally Eren huffs, reaching toward the coffee table to pick up your phone and see who can’t take the fucking hint - all the while still urging you up and down his shaft.

His jaw clenches at the name on the caller id. Of fucking course. It would be him. Eren is moments away from chucking your phone across the living room when the idea that hits him makes him pause. He’s always had a bit of a sadistic side.

He meets your eyes with a look that tells you you better do what he says. And he brushes his lips against yours, his words practically a growl, “don’t you dare fucking stop,” before he’s answering the phone and putting it on speaker.

“Hello?” A voice on the other end speaks. Your boyfriend. “Babe?”

You can barely think, let alone speak, yet somehow the word “yeah?” makes its way out of you, albeit breathlessly. 

“You ok? You sound weird.” You’re about to respond the same as before when Eren’s mouth wraps itself around one of your nipples and you practically wail. “Babe? What the fuck is going on?”

“Gonna let him hear you baby?” Eren worships your breast, biting down just a little before pulling back with a soft pop. “Let him hear just how good I can make you feel?” He picks up your phone and you have no doubt that your boyfriend can hear him clearly now. You’re not sure if you really even care, not as long as Eren is so deep in your heat that you swear you can see stars. 

“That’s what he was afraid of, right? Saw how much I wanted you. Afraid you’d want me back?” He lets a groan slip out, a little louder than is necessary. “Tell him how I make you feel, doll.”

“F-fuck, so good. So, so good, Eren - wanna cum all on your cock,”

Your boyfriend’s voice is livid over the phone. “Oh, you are such a fucking-”

“Good little slut for me, baby,” Eren praises you, his own hips thrusting from underneath you, trying to give you time to match his pace, but he’s finding it harder and harder to do with every squeeze and stroke. “Gonna let me fuck my cum into you? Dirty little slut wants to be all fucked out, huh? Go ahead, sweetheart, use my cock.” You can tell from his voice just how close he is. “Gimme a kiss.”

You could never say no to him, lips smashing against his.

“Tell me you love me.”

“Love you, ‘Ren,” your voice shakes and your words slur together, “love you so much.”

“So good for me. Now cum on my cock.”

You feel yourself break apart from above him, collapsing onto his chest as his arms wrap around your back and one of his hands holds the back of your head to keep you against him as he continues to fuck himself deep into you. It doesn’t take him long to fall apart either, praise and affection moaned out directly into your ear. Feel so fucking good cumming around me, make me so fucking happy baby, did so good for me, love you so much.

You both forget about your boyfriend on the other end of the phone when he shouts out “you can have her, Jeager, fucking slut,” before hanging up.

Eren’s face is one of bliss and satisfaction when he pulls you into another long kiss, tongue licking a line across the roof of your mouth. “Like I needed his permission.”

[bopit-twistit]

sometimes people at work just dont wanna fucking listen to me bc im the youngest but sometimes im just RIGHT and it takes them weeks of trying different bullshit until they finally try the thing ive been saying all along and then pat themselves on the back for finally figuring it out