#but episode FOUR? JESUS

[iholli]

if you need me I'll be facedown on the floor, bawling my eyes out

[trash-and-trash-accessories]

Fox Mulder doesn't have the "I Want To Believe" poster there because he's crazy. He doesn't have it there to broadcast his beliefs or as a mantra or to remind him to always look for aliens.

Fox Mulder keeps that "I Want To Believe" sign above his desk to remind him of his own internal biases.

That sign hangs above Mulder's desk to remind him of his own shortcomings and flaws. He's aware that he's a hack with dangerous beliefs and prone to flights of fancy and maybe even delusions. He's aware that he's desperately searching for aliens and monsters where there are only men doing bad things. And he has to remind himself of that, constantly.

That's why he's thrilled when he meets Scully and she challenges his beliefs, says that logically aliens don't exist. He's thrilled when she tells him to cut the crap in the pilot episode. He needs someone to challenge him. He needs someone who won't take his shit and put up with his flights of fancy. And he knows it. He's been dealing with himself for years and he feels relief and joy when Scully comes in and says enough of your bullshit. We're doing this my way. With science and logic. He isn't smiling and teasing her because he thinks he's smarter and better than her. He's smiling because she's exactly the person he needs in his life.

That's why he tells her right away that he's a UFO freak with trauma about his sister and a true believer. Not because he's trying to convince her to believe, but because he needs her to understand where he's coming from and what's wrong with him. So she can understand that either he's a dangerous lunatic himself, or he's delving into a dangerous conspiracy and either way she could be collateral damage if she stays with him. He spends the pilot episode reckoning with the idea that either he's a maniac or he's pulling this young fresh detective into danger. When she starts agreeing with him he gets upset, talks her out of it.

Mulder keeps that sign above his desk to remind himself to look into the "reasonable logical" explanations. He keeps that sign on his desk because he knows he's flawed and biased and frankly, dangerous.

He tells Scully exactly what he thinks is happening and about all the crazy stuff he believes not because he's trying to convince her to believe too, but so she can be his sounding board. So she can throw his illogical bullshit back in his face and remind him to look past his own biases and paranoia and quasi-religious zealotry. Because he knows he needs that. He knows he's in a conspiracy brained echo chamber of his own making and having a slow-burn mental breakdown. And he sees Scully as salvation from himself. As another figure in his quasi-religious belief system. The savior.

As the series develops he relies on her more and more to reality check him. Literally reality check him and manage what he worries might all be a delusion.

Mulder pretends he's confident and all the constant criticism and sidelong glances don't get to him and that might be true because he doesn't respect those people but he respects Scully. And he needs someone he respects to tell him when he's wrong, when he's being biased or actively delusional. Scully is his salvation. She's compassionate about his trauma and the reasoning behind his beliefs, but confident and logical enough to tell him when it's all bullshit. She's his savior, his rock, and often his only real connection to material reality.

[end0r4]

Zelda Spellman, Chilling Adventures of Sabrina | Chapter 𝟛𝟞 : At the Mountains of Madness

[bloodbuzz-ohio]

The O.C. 1.07 The Escape (requested by anonymous)

[imnotkosmic]

"The Chosen," season one, episode four:

• "I'm not exactly jumping out of my sandals become Creepy John pointed at someone!!"

• Andrew's fanboying when he sees Jesus.

• John, James and Zeb??? How did they run that fast in water?? Hello???

• Simon after the miracle: "can u do that again?"

• Poor Matthew spent the night on the beach :(

• + his dog staying by his side

• Simon talking with Matthew before he fishes on Shabatt (first time we see him being "nice" to Matthew??)

• Simon saying to Andrew "go help Eden's brothers, they must be cooking. I can smell it burning"

• Eden's brothers IMMEDIATELY going after Simon when he said they're Eema couldn't stay with them.

[zichiwatchesyou]

Watched Dandadan ep 7

No matter how much pain and suffering I might face in the future I ain’t dying.

I want to let my family see me grow up, achieve things like they always wanted to see

I want to make them happy and proud

[chryso-chryso]

melody journey ep8's 荒芜之地 performance is now on spotify!!!!!

(i don't think there will be a performance for next week. what a relief, honestly! this show's filming schedule was ridiculous)

(edit: no performance for ep 10, either! alas)

ep 1, ep 2, ep 3, ep 4, ep 6, ep 7, ep 11!

[seilon]

the banter in s1 (2005) doctor who is actually so incredibly scripted and acted. like. most of the quips and running gags are so simple yet they’re so damn affective

[kingdomoftyto]

Re-reading the transcript for "Matryoshka" on my lunch break.

"Angels are real. Our town is a deeply weird place. We know and acknowledge that it is a deeply weird place. There are dotted lines and arrows in the sky, and I love my family. And I love my brother Steve, he was right about everything, he always has been."

Valiantly not crying on my lunch break.

[bucklikethedollar]

i know i’m like 20 years late to the party but god the sopranos is so fucking good

[hauntingblue]

JINBEEE I LOVE YOU!!!! JINBEEEEEEEEE

[hearts401]

when i saw you hating on angel dusk b4 i watched hazbin it made me laugh but i was like “ok surely he can’t be THAT bad who knows maybe i’ll really like him” but then i watched literally two episodes of this show and i already want him gone. like whenever he’s on screen my first thought is “charlie shouldve gotten this screen time tbh” HASHSBHFHJRJEBRBRNR

GOD I HATE HIM SO MUCH JAS OH MY GOD I NEED HIM TO LEAVE

[artfulacrostic]

memes for The Bad Batch 2x16, "Plan 99"

no spoilers just me being sad bc i'm literally too depressed to figure out all the funny things and make jokes abt it yet

[whatyoutaughtwasfear]

LOVE that Mari was like "Oh you lost a tooth? Oh bc you haven't eaten in four days? You're just malnourished that's normal"

[depressedskeleton]

oh it's getting worse