#but eh. i don't much believe in that.
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turns out actions have consequences and i can't just act mentally ill around people five days a week and expect them not to be miffed with me at least a little bit :)
#principal teacher HATES ME holy fuck#they got reprimanded by the school hierarchy bc i didnt clean the puke as well as i thought i did#and now i've destroyed every good sentiment they've ever had towards me#it's cool it's cool to remember that no matter how much effort i put into it i'm literally unable to act normal for extended periods#and im just. actively toxic to be around.#im gonna make the effort to go to the ER again i think#bc it's not just a ''get better'' deal i have to have medical professionals in contact w the shcool#but eh. i don't much believe in that.#is it stupid to just drop out now#i feel like it is#i don't want to ''get better'' it still sucks!! holy shit does it still suck!!#i feel okay sometimes and i tell my friends about it i'm like yeah it's bad but i don't FEEL too sad about it#and they're like. baby you're in denial.#which. i mean. i do never follow through on the improvements i thought of when i feel pretty good.#so ahem. if i accept that those brief moments of enthusiasm are flukes. uh. i'm probably never going to be happy? comfortable? at peace?#what's the fucking point then?#broadcasting my misery#vent#ed tw
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Neverafter doodles!! + the other puss in boots & wolf...they're friends!
#milla's art#haven't quiet found my characterisation of em yet but <3#neverafter#dimension 20#d20#destiny's children#ylfa snorgelsson#rosamund du prix#pib#puss in boots#prince gerard of greenleigh#pinocchio#mother goose#mother timothy goose#d20 pinocchio#idk how much to tag for these guys yet but eh#i don't believe there are any spoilers here.......#dimension 20 neverafter#d20 neverafter
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love like you / maternal pang
bonus under cut:
the first stephanie + the maternal pang tone destroyer i couldn't include bc it's a serious comic
#you might wanna zoom in for this one sorry#anyway i think putty likes orel. not enough to really get off his ass and help him but there's a fondness there#and i think his position of power relative to the rest of the town could be helpful in influencing things if he like. believed in them more#but he doesn't really expect any better from himself or the rest of moralton and i think it's because he doesn't really believe goodness is#attainable esp by christian/biblical standards. he thinks it's kind of a pretense for everyone. but then stephanie is good so what does tha#say about him? or moralton? i think he'd get a bit better with her around.#it'd make him insecure but she's an encouraging type so. maybe he'd get there eventually#we don't get to see much of that but eh. i think this show is hopeful at the end of the day. i don't think moralton WOULD change much but i#Could change a little. um. anyway that's what this comic is about lol#also im in love with stephanie. so.#moral orel#orel puppington#rod putty#reverend putty#stephanie putty#skrunkart#sorry if the models are kinda inconsistent i haven't drawn these fellers before#it's occurring to me that this is probably the longest comic i've posted on here? just by panel number anyway#which like. moral orel deserves it but that's kinda surprising because i've certainly made longer stuff before#but it's mostly oc stuff from like 3 years ago i never posted and don't really plan on posting#i guess i just tend to stick to gags or quick emotional punches and this is a more lengthy character exploration#which i tend to save for fics. but it's winter break so i've got the time. maybe that's it#this was supposed to be a quick thing where i got to draw stephanie what happened. anyway more moral orel stuff on the way but sheesh#this one kinda got away from me is all. but i like it :)#also full disclosure i forgot to go back and figure out stephanie's tattoos and i don't care enough to. sorry steph ily but im done#also btw i DO think most of moralton are true believers they're just like. assholes/hypocritical. they're godfearing but lazy when it comes#to ACTUALLY helping people (or otherwise let self interest get in the way leading to loopholes etc)#sorry i haven't written about the show before so the meta analysis/interpretation is leaking in#does moral orel have an abbreviation? it's a pretty short name so maybe not. i think moror would be cute :)#also i discovered i can do half-tones on firealpaca so i wanted to try it out :3
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Mmmm iterator oc doodle. they're cute :)
#rainworld#rain world#rw#iterator oc#rw iterator#rw oc#uhhhh no idea how to tag this still aha#think I've narrowed the names down to . [consideration of the sun and moon] and [satellites antagonistic orbit]#I think the first one is cute. but I like the sound of the second one more. but the first one makes more Sense.#cus I don't believe their creators would've wanted them to be antagonistic w/ each other aha#and the two of them are individually. [laughing sun] and [snarling moon]#snarls is indeed way more damaged too ! just. absulutely wreaked. laugh is Also damaged but not Nearly as much ehe#jbird's art
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apparently at some point it became my mission in life to have a flight rising dragon for every character from idw sonic
#so far i have tangle whisper starline surge and kit all in varying states of completion#scried nite and don tonight due to the gay win and i already have a dragon lined up for don but i'm gonna need to breed one for nite#jewel i have pretty much everything but the dragon because the damn player i'm buying a parent from won't complete the crossroads </3#i want to have belle obviously but funny clown nose is integral and there's no funny clown nose apparel on this useless website yet#i tried a little to replicate it with genes but it's not working. praying to all eleven dragon gods for clown nose apparel this notn#i keep trying to scry rough and tumble as a single aberration with diamond/spade but i don't think there's a colour that works </3#ah well i'll make em work as moderns i guess. give em their shoes it's all they have in this baka life#off the top of my head i believe that makes it just lanolin clutch and mimic who i haven't made any sort of start on yet#and the other three original diamond cutters of course but i dunno if i'll do them. at this rate though why fucking not eh#you fool. you've read my entire infodump about my flight rising projects. bask in the sheer terror of pure unmitigated autism
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I don't know... horrible things happen all around the world and it's not a competition
Atrocities are committed against multiple groups in multiple parts of the world at the exact same moment, and none of them erase each other. They all matter, all the people in this world who are being brutalized matter. There shouldn't be any line you draw where one group doesn't actually matter as much as another
You're welcome to prioritize your energy towards helping one group or another, but what's not ok is invalidating or dismissing people who are actively being harmed
Same goes for trying to figure out which social group has things worst (and lets be honest, always using a US lens)
Like... maybe the important thing is to prop each other up and help everyone get on their own feet rather than trying to... pick fights about if physical disabilities or mental illness are less respected (I'm trying to pick a more absurd example but sadly I've seen exactly that argument happen before). Maybe it doesn't really matter and what matters is helping who we can when we can
I'm tired of it, I'm just fucking tired of it. Support people, champion them when the world is just brutalizing them, but you don't need to throw a single other person under the bus to do that
Which seems to be an absolutely impossible lesson for people to learn
#I won't say anything else on this; but I will say that to me one of the groups that it feels like is most forgotten is Syrians#including by me if I'm honest#I don't know what's currently happening in Syria... but... my understanding is it still hasn't really gotten better#assad is still brutalizing people last I had heard#so rather than saying anything else I'd prefer to simply focus on some people it feels like were forgotten back during Obama#and... and have remained forgotten#and I'm sorry I can't do more to help with the suffering in the world#but... you notice what I'm not having to do here?#I'm not having to throw a single other person under the bus#I'm able to just focus on how much I wish for Syrians to be ok (which is a hollow gesture on my part in many ways I think)#and I can keep all the focus on Syrians rather than throwing anyone else under the bus or doing any whataboutism#and that's literally all I'm asking of you fucking people#don't downplay human misery to try and make your thing seem more important#they're both fucking important... they're all important#there's so much suffering I can't even keep up with it#there's so much of it that I can only name without knowing the details; Congo; I believe Sudan is still suffering; Haiti#I don't know how things are in Ethiopia right now... I can't keep track#and none of these situations and the horrible things they're dealing with; things I haven't even been able to follow#none of it detracts from and of the issues I am following more closely#I don't need to compare them and say 'well it's not as bad'; because... bad is bad and any is too much#and nothing I say here will do a damn thing; no one'll hear and even if they did they'd ignore it or get pissed#that's what my evidence shows me about how people behave#but suffering isn't a competition; the correct amount is zero#and... perhaps I'd have more tolerance if I hadn't watched how you behave with stuff#...the worst part is the person I adore who... man... I wish I could just get them to really think through their words#they mean well; they're coming from a place of love; but I just haven't been able to paint the picture for them of the harm#and I'm flawed; I don't have all the answers; I could be wrong here#but... can you at least see why I feel that maybe we shouldn't pit misery against each other#that the people suffering have more in common with each other than opposed and... maybe westerners aren't fucking helping#eh... too fucking drained thinking about this; end of tags
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no y’all don’t get it, the reason Jenna doesn’t connect the dots and figures out that Leverage is secretly being her guardian angels is that the dots connect to make an absolutely ridiculous picture!
Like! She’s very smart and very willing to throw herself into risky situations to do what she thinks is right and I love her, but no matter how clever you are “a bunch of super thieves/vigilantes are also trying to take this guy down and are now secretly helping me by making a bunch of random but not that incredibly unlikely shit happen” is just. like. c’mon. if you say you’d figure that out while in a ridiculously stressful situation in which you constantly put yourself at risk of worst case getting raped and best case losing your job and possibly getting sued, you’re lying.
Yeah the team’s cons are obvious to us! bc we know them! but normal ppl don’t connect “venue shut down bc food poisoning” and “randomly found a singer at a completely different venue” and “there was a fire alarm” bc all those things can in fact happen, for them all to happen in quick succession is random and lucky but it’s not “omg someone is spying on me and??? giving me?????? things i need?”
#leverage redemption#the belly of the beast job#someone was like why doesn't she recognize the sound of tapped phones?#uh? bc she doesn't know what that sounds like? she's a civilian as Eliot said?#would you recognize the sound of a tapped phone?#you sure you wouldn't also dismiss it with an ''eh probably the connection being bad for a second''?#i love her#she's young and bright and clever and naive to a degree too yeah#she thinks no i'll be careful this won't happen to me#and she's right bc she's being watched over#i don't think she's letting herself think about what could happen#she just runs and runs and keeps going and it's working! it's working! so she's really excited and can't really believe it#so she doesn't question it and she doesn't hesitate or waste time figuring out who tf that food truck woman is#she'll probably decompress and a few days after the events of the episode shoot up in bed and go#omg the woman in the how to crack a safe video was the waiter at that bar#and then she'll put all that energy into figuring that out#but in the moment? too much adrenaline
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well! that project's out of my brain now :) now what
#just me hi#“now what” i have tide in there now and i am not going to post much about them lmao#or maybe i will i dunno! but some things stay the most fun when they're secrets ehe :3#//a lot of weather has been happening recently huh#lot more than i'm used to anyway lol - and why's it gotta be so humid out here like C'mon hghf#the air. is Thick. and Wet. like a toad#//Oh but i've been having so much fun drawing recently lol :D#it started getting flat and really boring for some reason to where it felt like i was doing it like a chore - just a motion to keep the#gears running ykno? but yeah i've been enjoying it a lot more these past so many days :D !#i didn't even really notice it until i realized i had zoned in on a comic i was drawing and hadn't considered working on anything else hfsh#//also i've been playing with that music box app/website again - i should prolly use a real music program but none of them are like this#thing ykno? cuz i just tip tap and Boom the sound i need is Right There !! :>#i tried soundtrap i really did but man it's a lot hhhghf#i don't like how it's set up unfortunately. oh well!#i need like minimal clutter or i Die. Gruesomely hbfsh - just what i need and nothing less nothing more. it's a balance#/despite that i am Really Bad at passively organizing things lol - and when i try i just misplace things like crazy. scavenger hunts are a#guarantee lol :)#//i'm still struggling spell guarantee btw but oo am i getting close !! hfshbh#it's the second A it always trips me up#that does not sound like an A. i believe that's identity fraud my friend [<- aggressive squinting]#//anyway sun's out i'm inside and i'm going to listen to music forever#/do you think there are electric guitars in the heavenly choir? hm!#//anyway back to my wanderings!! toodles toodles :D
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boy howdy, I am working myself into a full panic over this. if I get an hour of sleep tonight it will be a miracle.
#like this is an INTERVIEW. do you know how many job interviews I have had in my life????#compared to how many jobs I have had???????#I GOT REJECTED BY WALGREENS FOR CHRISTS SAKE#I just. this man is holding my entire plan for my future right now in his hands#if he doesn't want me. If he decides I wouldn't be good in his lab I don't know what I'll do#like yeah yeah life will keep going and the world will keep turning and stuff#but I am not joking I will be devastated. and then I will have to TELL people about it#and like I still have yet to hear back from the other school and none of the professors there have talked to me#so idk if I could do what I want to there either (they do have the classes I want so I'm assuming one of the professors does what I want)#and everyone keeps saying it'll be fine and I'll do good and anyone would want me in their lab#but I DONT THINK IM IMPRESSIVE. I compare myself to other scientists and eh. I don't measure up#like sure I have good bench skills and I can learn pretty much anything you set me to#but I don't know how to come up with research proposals#I don't know how to ask good questions about papers I read#I don't have good ideas for further research#like. I did library prep at work for 3 years and we recently hired someone who has more or less taken it over#and he actually understands and talks about the actual molecular processes in a way I never learned#idk I just feel like yeah I'm good at science. but I'm good because I'm good at following directions#I am not actually inovative or creative or increasing understanding#point is I am stressed and people keep telling me not to be but I don't believe them and I am scared that I have got myself too excited#and I am about to be let down very hard very fast#and I don't really have any safety nets in place if it doesn't work out
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OK SO I wrote most of this starting at 2 am and stopping at like 3 also 4 am after listening to numbers by temporex for the fifth time (I was inspired by the overall vibe of the song link to the song if you wanna check it out) and originally it was going to be small bummer fic written only for myself where Guillermo did get turned by Derek and he goes back but nothing changes around him but I got a little too carried away so now it’s about (roughly) that and Nandor wishing for Guillermo to return after he left and didn’t return after becoming a vampire.
disclaimer: I'm currently clinging onto a free grammarly account for dear life and I tried my best to edit the nonsense I wrote instead of sleeping so if at any point this sounds weird I apologize!
and with all of that out of the way I now give you Just Alright:
Guillermo sat in the same old bed he’s been sleeping in for over a decade. He thought when Derek turned him things would change but no not much changed when it came to the way he was treated. Things did change overall sure he was gone for weeks before returning to the mansion but in a way they haven’t. What it all boiled down to was the fact that nobody really noticed the change. Normally Guillermo chalked it up to them being assholes but the reason they didn’t care or notice this time around was due to the fact that they had gotten themselves busy while he was gone.
Laszlo tried to go back to his old ways but after the loss of baby Colin he found himself going over to sean’s place to distance himself from the energy vampire he help raise. Whenever anyone asks him about it he brushes him off. Due to him being away from the house most of the time, he didn’t even know Guillermo was back let alone now a vampire for a while.
Colin Robinson still doesn’t remember being a freak child at all and so he went back into looking into energy vampires just now without the help of Laszlo. He tried to get Laszlo’s help at first but after a couple of fuck offs he gave up. He still treated Guillermo the way he did before mainly to annoy him.
Nadja had a lot on her plate. At first, it was having to deal with what to do now that the nightclub dream was basically dead then it was getting to the council building back to the way it was before to trying to get Laszlo to stop hiding away in the neighbor's house and actually getting him to sit down and talk about how he was feeling. With all of that, she didn’t seem to care he was a vampire now. I mean it was understandable she was doing a lot but she still treated him like a familiar. He wasn’t even her familiar to begin with yet he was still left to do all the hard labor for her. After some protesting and reminding her that he’s an equal now for the tenth time she got a familiar to do her bidding instead.
The only one who cared at all about the change was his ex-master Nandor. As for why well that’s a really long story. Let’s just say he’s the reason why he ended up back there.
Guillermo thought about going back at first. It was his original plan but he couldn’t bring himself to do it. He knew he would have to eventually to get his stuff back but he wanted to fend for himself. He knew he could go out on his own he didn’t need any big strong vampires to fight for him he was Guillermo: by blood a vampire killer, an ex-familiar, an ex-bodyguard, and now a vampire. He knew how to kill he could live alone and they wouldn’t care if he was gone. If they did someone would have found him by now and begged him to come back.
But in the blink of an eye after a couple of weeks of trying to live on is own only to crash at Derek’s place half of the time to just living with Derek (Derek needed a friend anyway), he found himself face to face with the entrance of the place he wasted over a decade of his life in. He doesn’t remember walking back just suddenly being at the door.
“What the fuck why am I back here?” he asked himself. He tried to turn back but he couldn’t. No like he physically couldn’t turn back. Despite not wanting to be there he knocked the door.
“Come in the door is open.” He heard a voice he really didn’t want to hear say. He could also hear a few footsteps on the other side along with a few small sniffles thanks to vampire hearing. He opened the door and got a few steps in before getting tackled into a hug by Nandor. Guillermo was not only surprised but still had no idea what on earth was happening.
“What the fuck is going on?” Guillermo says extremely confused. He looked around over the vampire’s shoulder as Nandor cried into his. As he was searching he found the Djinn standing there with his notebook and pen not too far from them. Well, that explains it. Guillermo didn’t have time to be upset yet since he has to deal with the sobbing vampire hugging him.
Wait Nandor was hugging him willingly? Guillermo tried his best to pinch himself. “Ow.” well he wasn’t dreaming so yeah he WAS hugging him and he was hugging him REALLY tightly. If he was still human this would have most likely killed him either due to suffocation or Nandor accidentally breaking something really important.
“Oh, Guillermo where have you been? I was so worried about you I- I missed you so much.” as he talked he cried harder and harder. Guillermo was honestly surprised to see him in such a state. He can’t recall seeing him express his emotions or saying how he felt ever let alone see him cry this hard. He was HUGGING HIM for fuck’s sake.
“Master I like this and all but this is starting to hurt a lot” he knew he didn’t need to call him that but he still did out of habit. Plus he didn’t know if calling him Nandor would piss him off so it was better to be safe for now.
“I just missed you so much and if I hug you tight enough you won’t be able to leave again.”
Guillermo would be lying if he said that didn’t make him feel at least a little bit like shit. But in his defense, he thought Nandor would be too busy reading his books or whatever to notice his absence. Sure he wouldn’t be gone forever since he has all eternity to go back to the house to say hi or to bump into Nandor while out hunting and small talk about his times as his familiar. He didn’t expect Nandor to actually be hurt by this. He knew he should have known better but he did what he did anyway without taking Nandor actually noticing into consideration.
“You didn’t even leave a note. I thought you were out on one of your silly human errands, but when you didn’t return I thought you were hurt or dead.”
“Well, I’m here now.”
“And that’s all that matters.” Nandor slowly let go of the hug.
Guillermo wanted to say his goodbyes and get out as fast as he can but he knew he would feel like shit if he left knowing it would hurt Nandor this much he made his way inside.
After Nandor calmed down a bit they ended up walking to Nandor’s room to talk. Looking around his room and the house overall while thankfully repaired the house was still a mess. Bodies were all over the place, candles melted all the way down leaving puddles of wax, and every other surface was dusty. It reminded him of when he first returned to the house after trying to leave this life behind for the first time.
When he entered Nandor’s room it was messier than the rest of the house but considering the state he was in when he entered Guillermo could make an educated guess as to why so he knew he couldn’t judge.
“Sorry for the mess. When I noticed you were gone for longer than usual at first I tried to ignore it but I just couldn’t. I tore this room apart trying to see if you hid a letter or anything that would tell me where you went. It was honestly stupid of me to think you would hide something like that since you didn’t hide the letter you left behind last time.”
“I really should have told you why I left before…” should he tell the truth?
“Before what?” he looked at him confused then he saw his fangs. “Oh…”
“I paid Derek to turn me.”
Silence so thick you could feel it fill the room. It was Nandor who broke it with tears slowly running down his face again as he spoke.
“Why?”
“Look I know you view vampirism as a curse and I knew you didn’t want to turn me because of that and I know you’re not the biggest fan of change so by turning this way you wouldn’t have to-”
“Why did you not come back?”
Nandor’s words felt like a stake to the heart. Guillermo didn’t know how to respond so he froze. Any word he could think of saying vanished like he did weeks before abruptly and without saying goodbye. If he didn’t feel like shit before he felt like the worst person on planet earth now.
“Master I-”
“DON’T YOU DARE CALL ME THAT!”
“LOOK I’M SORRY OK!?”
“You think that’s going to make up for you abandoning me!?”
“I didn’t plan to stay away I was going to come back.”
“When Guillermo fucking when?”
Silence flooded the room again. This time It was Guillermo who ended it.
“Nandor look I’m so fucking sorry I didn’t intend to leave permanently I was going to come back and change everything for the better but couldn’t bring myself to go back I… I’m so sorry. If I knew I would be out for as long as I have I would have said goodbye.” In the middle of his sentence, Guillermo caught Nandor’s tears and began to cry too. “If I were you I wouldn’t forgive me.”
Nandor went up to him and cupped his right cheek with his hand wiping away a tear. “Oh my sweet sweet Guillermo I knew you wanted it so bad but I didn’t turn you not because being a vampire is a curse. I didn’t turn you cause then you would have left. I know once you were one you would have no purpose here anymore. it was selfish sure but fuck I just couldn’t stand the thought of you leaving and I thought if I kept you busy you wouldn’t leave. Making excuses to keep you as a human, promoting you to bodyguard when your life was at risk, making turning you into a long trip all of it was to keep you by my side for as long as I can. When you were shipped off to England by Laszlo and I ended up traveling alone I was left to think about why I did this. Why I wanted you to stay for so long and when I realized why I didn’t want to think about it. So when we all came back as I was helping you out after you fell into the water filled basement I used finding someone to marry to cover up what I found out” it clicked in Guillermo’s head what he was getting at but he let him continue. “I was hoping every day that you would stop me from going through with the wedding, I made every task hard in hopes it would stop you and, when everyone was objecting I was hoping you would be in that line. I wanted you to stop me causes…I love you Guillermo so so much. I just couldn’t bring myself to fully accept it until you left.”
Guillermo nuzzled into Nandor’s hand as he began to cry harder “I love you too.”
Nandor pulled him into a kiss.
They could get angry at each other for what they had done another time. For now, all they wanted to do was hug and be glad that they could express how they feel for hopefully not the last time.
And it wasn’t time flew by and they slowly vented out their feelings to each other. They had their scheduled yelling match about what they had both done to each other once all the tears were fully over a few days later. But what had started as them fighting with their tongues figuratively turned into fighting with their tongues literally. Needless to say, they forgave each other quickly after that. As for what they were now they settled on boyfriends. it felt weird at first to say but after a while, the word felt great coming out of their mouths.
Not much has changed really looking back as he sat on his old bed. Laszlo was still horny, Colin was still annoying and Nadja would kill him if he boiled her down into one word even if it was just in his head. But as he sees Nandor take a box of his stuff up to their new room he's glad he at least made one change. Considering he has all eternity to help the others for now he’ll take this as a win.
“Guillermo, what are you doing?”
“Oh just thinking that’s all.”
“You know I was doing some thinking too and I was thinking maybe I can give you my last wish.”
“How thought full.” he gave him a peck on the cheek. “You know I think I already know what I’m going to wish for.”
“May I ask what that wish might be?”
“A coffin big and wide enough for the two of us,” Guillermo said with the biggest grin on his face.
#oh the lovely art of writing a fic instead of sleeping at a reasonable time but fuck you past me I woke up feeling like SHIT cause of you#can't believe I'm posting this but eh fuck it you know#wwdits#what we do in the shadows#guillermo de la cruz#nandor the relentless#nandermo#what we do in the shadows fanfic#hurt/comfort#A LOT of crying#gather around and lend me your time#the first fic I've ever completed#speaking of fics I'm gonna go back to writing the serial killer guillermo fic in a bit just taking a little break from it for now#I was putting a LOT of time into it and if I put TOO much time into something (especially if it involves a lot of writing)#after a bit I get really sick of it and I don't wanna burn myself out so yeaaaaaaaah
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izzy haters at this point are just gaslighting themselves as to what happens in the show and it becomes increasingly hilarious considering, well, what happens in the show. can't wait for the takes next week
#shrimp thoughts#i'm particularly in love with the insistence that he's the most unreliable narrator ever#but rather than every single statement from izzy being proven factually incorrect the antis just... don't like him and on purpose choose#to believe the direct opposite of what he says. like 'i hate this person and i think they have bad taste so if they hate something i know#i'm gonna love it'#no but for real i'm out there like 'omg is it ok for so much of s2 to be about izzy? isn't this too much izzy? shouldn't they have focused#on other crew members instead?' but people are out there like 'eh izzy's not important or complex and the writers just wanted to quickly#get him on the revenge's side so that everyone could band against the common enemy in the season finale' quickly... as in in 5 eps outta 8
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for george fucking up fics, here's one called "i" by saintaches. it's abo (NOT your traditional abo stuff tho at ALL) and also unfinished. but i liked it- george does fuck up here, and it's not brushed off (and is also a good take on abo tropes & flipping them on their head) https://archiveofourown.org/works/38743203
it's kind of interesting that there's not that many george fucking up fics either, especially since dream's definitely a lot more open w/ emotions. like i can see dream messing up and immediately apologizing, or trying to communicate. i can't see george apologizing/communicating at all until he absolutely has to
!! another rec (haven't read can't vouch again)
and it is pretty interesting! i don't know if i can speak about them like that but i find the imbalance pretty intriguing if anything
#i don't know if it is that i believe george is less likely to apologize rather than the fact that what i see from the fandom is less agency#for him in a way#like things Happen to him in some fics and he Reacts to them#does that make sense?#idk maybe i'm reading too much into it eh#star anons
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❝ 𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐑𝐒 𝐓𝐎 𝐊𝐄𝐄𝐏 ❞
❝ SATORU GOJO HAS LOVED YOU SINCE YOU WERE KIDS - HE’S GONNA MAKE YOU HIS ! ❞
✧ series: call it what you want (part one)
✧ pairing: younger!satoru gojo x reader
✧ summary: satoru gojo fell in love with you from the moment he met you at eight years old. and now, in his twenties, when he sees you again after you move back to be closer to your aunt and your cousin, suguru, he knows — he has to make you his by the end of the summer.
✧ warnings: 18+, nsfw, eventual smut, childhood friends to strangers to lovers, fake dating, gojo is four years younger than you, rich boy!gojo, suguru is your little cousin, very fluffy, slow burn, like they don't even kiss, but they will :), love at first sight for gojo, naoya is your ex,
✧ w/c: 15,285
“Never thought we’d be doing this, did you?” Satoru muttered in your ear, breath fanning hot against your neck, “be a little quieter, sweetheart, otherwise Suguru might hear us,”
You whine, but his fingers drag against your kiss bitten lips, until the digits slide into your mouth, as his hips rut against yours. And you didn’t think you’d ever be in position with your cousin’s best friend — pressed to the doorway of your apartment where Suguru could walk in at anytime.
This isn't what you thought would happen when you invited him over to talk. This isn't what you thought would happen when you agreed to pretend to date him. This isn't what you thought about -- but how could you think about anything with the way his breath felt against your skin?
He loved you -- loved you since you were kids, and he couldn't let you go, not like this. Not when he had you.
Not that you even wanted him to.
You didn’t think you’d shiver as he pressed open mouthed kisses down your neck, tongue flicking against your burning skin. You never thought you’d want to moan his name, like you had, far too many times.
“You may have never thought about this, Princess, but I sure have,” he presses a kiss to your jaw, the wet sounds your skin slapping together, as he reaches around your body, pinned on your stomach to the mattress, to rub at your swollen clit, drawing a muffled cry from your lips, “far too many times,”
In fact, Satoru Gojo knew exactly the first time he fell for you. It was the day he first met you.
“Be my girlfriend!”
It was less of a question and more of a statement.
One declared in the doorway of your room, with flushed cheeks and flowers in hand. And they weren’t your cheeks or hands, but your baby cousin’s best friend.
The first time Satoru Gojo asked you out was at the ripe old age of eleven, but truth be told he had held this crush since the moment he saw you when he had come over to Suguru’s house for the first time, almost three years ago now.
Your fingers brushed his as you gently took the flowers, “Satoru, you know I care about you, but not like that. You’re better off seeing other people your own age, ok?” You smiled at him, the same way you always did, a slight pout on his lips as he nodded, saying nothing more.
And you knew you were right — there was no fucking question that you were right. He was eleven and you were fifteen — an age gap untenable and unreachable.
But now—
“Long time no see,” Satoru said, lips curled in an all too cocky smile that you couldn’t believe belonged to the same blushing kid who confessed so earnestly back then, “it’s been too long,” your name rolled off his tongue with a familiarity that was the same but all too different.
But he wasn’t a kid anymore — far from it. It had been over a decade since you had seen him, as the summer he confessed was the last one you had spent at your aunt and uncle’s home. And you and your family moved overseas shortly after that, and you didn’t return until now, four years after you graduated college, for a job offer you couldn’t pass up.
And you didn’t realize that so much time had passed.
But he did.
“Eh? What do you mean you can’t help me unpack today, Sugu?” you hold the phone between your ear and shoulder, as you rip open the tape on yet another box you had hauled into the proper room to unpack, “you told me—“
“I told you I’d help you unpack if I had time. But now, I’m stuck at work until the evening,” you heard your cousin sigh over the phone, “But don’t worry — you’ll have help—“
You’re too busy trying to rip the tape off as you rip into Suguru to notice the door creaking open behind you, “Suguru, I swear to god if you’re sending a total random stranger to help me—“
“Not a total stranger,” a voice says behind you, and your head whips around so quick, you nearly drop your phone, gripping it, “unless not seeing me for years makes me one,”
A mess of white locks and sunglasses tilted downward to reveal a hint of his cerulean eyes that you could never forget — but still, you barely recognize the man that has them. Even if the grin on his lips with the lilting sound of his voice told you that he very much recognized you.
“Satoru?” Suguru’s explanation falls on deaf ears, as Satoru’s eyes don’t bother to take in your new place, all too focused on you, hands slipping into his pockets, “you—“
He steps forward and plucks the phone from your fingers, “Yo Suguru, I told you it’d be better as a surprise,” and you gape at him, as his grin curls wider, “yeah, yeah, I didn’t take the phone to have you lecturing me — I get enough of that from my dad,” and Suguru says something that makes Satoru’s cheeks flush, and he hangs up, before his attention returns to you, “so, shall we unpack?”
A few minutes turns into hours of hauling boxes inside and then unpacking them. It’s relatively silent, surprisingly for Satoru. The silence was a far cry from the boy who couldn’t shut up for two seconds, telling you about the test he aced or something stupid that one of his classmates said or asking you about your day.
Instead you watch him haul boxes like they were filled with styrofoam and air from the truck outside, and then lift his shirt to wipe the sweat from his face, a flash of his abs shiny with perspiration. Your eyes dart away, suddenly incredibly fascinated with the contents of this box of kitchenware you opened up, cheeks burning, wondering when did the little boy you looked after become a man?
“Princess, where do you want this?” Satoru lifts a box, and you can’t see the writing on it from the angle he picks it up.
“Do you still have to call me Princess?” The embarrassing nickname your aunt had given you still stuck — the one that Suguru would always tease you with, while Satoru’s decidedly lacked any malice, “my aunt only called me that because she wanted a girl so bad,”
“Is that why Suguru is growing out his hair now? Trying to fulfill her dreams?” You snort, as you walk over to him, “it still fits you regardless of the reason Princess,”
You’re close, even with the box providing glancing around the box until you find it scrawled on the box underneath his arm — his very…muscular arm, veins bulging and muscles tense underneath the weight of the box—
“So this is stuff for my bedroom, you can just leave it on the floor, it’s right over here,” you lead him over and he places down the box, “I think that’s mostly it, I’m sorry Suguru made you come down here to help,”
“You don’t need to apologize, I wanted to see you,” and you smile softly, “it’s been too long,”
“It really has,” and your neck strains a little with how he towered over you, “can't believe you’re the same little boy I used to babysit,”
And he rolls his eyes, “Suguru would say it’s arguable I could still use a babysitter,” and you chuckle, “I’m not so little anymore, but I wouldn’t mind if you were my babysitter,”
Was he? No. No, he wasn’t.
Right?
“Stop fucking around,” you shake your head, as you head into the kitchen, “do you want to wash up, and then maybe I’ll order take out to thank you?” You’re turning on the faucet.
You don’t notice the slight pout on his lips, one he schools into a smile as you glance back at him, blinking as you find him shirtless.
Fuck. How was it possible for a person to be this gorgeous? Sweat slid down his body, slipping between the dips of his chest and ridges of his abs until disappearing into the fabric of his pants, or somewhere hidden—
You look away — “I’d rather take a shower. Do you mind?” And you force your voice not to come out a squeak, busying yourself with washing your hands, just so you don’t have to look.
“Yeah, of course, the bathroom is just around the corner. There should already be fresh towels inside,” and yet his steps grow closer, as you glance back, “uh—“
He’s still fucking shirtless.
“Instead of take out, can we grab dinner somewhere? You haven’t been back to the area recently so it’s a good chance to show you around,”
“You really don’t have to—“
“I want to, Princess,” he cuts you off, reaching around you to grab a water bottle off the counter, “get ready while I clean up?”
And you bite your lip, “Okay, okay,” and he grins back, a glimpse of the little boy that beams at you when you’d praise him for a high mark on a test.
“It’s a date!” And he’s off, disappearing into the bathroom, and you’re left there, wondering — what had you gotten yourself into?
~~~
“So,” Satoru lifts a spoonful of his dessert — a fruit parfait with a sugar coma inducing amount of whipped cream — and you were almost relieved to see some things about him hadn’t changed. How many times had you scolded him as a kid not to eat so much sugar — and he still hasn’t kicked the habit. You bit back your chuckle, as he spoke, “did you get dumped?”
You almost choke on your drink, as you splutter for a moment, before glaring at him.
And yet the more they stayed the same.
“I see you’re as subtle as you were when you were 11,” you mutter, setting your drink down, as you wipe your mouth with a napkin. Satoru tilts his head, a smirk pulling at the corner of his lips.
“So you dumped him?” He leans back, “I didn’t know you had such high standards,” your cheeks burn, distracting yourself with becoming enthralled in the menu — Satoru had dragged you to a hole in the wall barbecue place (after your insistence that you didn’t want anything fancy after unpacking for hours).
“How did you know I broke—“ and you cut yourself off at the obviousness of the answer, slapping another piece of meat on the grill, the sizzle punctuated by your words, “I’m going to murder him,”
“Well, you’re in the right place to dispose of his body,” Satoru licks the spoon clean, before sticking it back in the whipped cream, “why did you break up with him?”
You shrugged, “I realized he was a narcissistic prick who only wanted me as a trophy,” and Satoru whistled lowly, “I’m done with dating losers. And dating in general,”
“I don’t think you should give up on dating just because you had a few bad experiences,” his voice grows soft, “you deserve to be happy and taken care of, even if you have bad taste,”
And you pout, “I don’t have-“ and he tilts his head, and you lift a few pieces of meat from the grill onto your plate, tongs clattering slightly as you set it down, “fuck, I do,” you groan, shaking your head, “that’s why I had to get out of there. Just needed a fresh start you know?”
“Sometimes that’s just what you need,” and your lips curl.
“Sounds like you speak from experience,” and his eyes flit up to yours, gleaming in the low light of the restaurant, cerulean irises catching the drops of light like comets across his gaze.
“Don’t know what you mean, Princess,” he busies himself with his parfait, and you scoff.
“Come on, half the girls in this place are glaring at me while I sit here, the waitress has been flirting with you, and now they had brought you out the biggest dessert that I’m starting to wonder if they even serve it here,” he spares a glance around, several gasps from giggling girls who avert their gazes, before his eyes are back on you.
“Jealous?” You roll your eyes — he wasn’t lacking for ego at least.
“More like wondering what a guy like you is still doing single,” and he sighs, leaning back, with a tilt of his head.
“You sure are curious about me,” and his gaze softens for a moment, while he picks at his dessert, scooping the strawberry off the top, “there’s only really been one person that I really wanted,” his tone grew more serious, lips in a bittersweet smile, “but she’s never really looked me like that,”
“Don’t tell me it’s one of those things where she rejected you and you have to have her now,” and he chuckles, shaking his head, gaze far too wistful.
His words are slow, as slow as the ice melting in your glass, “It’s more of if I don’t have her, I don’t want anyone else,” and your heart squeezed — would you ever have someone care so deeply for you?
“Then why haven’t you said anything?” you picked up another piece of meat off the grill, “anyone would be lucky to be with you,” and you meant it — he was blunt, but also kind, sweet, not to mention rich and you flushed as you thought back to his hiked up shirt — good looking.
But he only stares back at you, tilting his head — expression unreadable, an emotion you can’t grasp before it’s hidden under his gaze’s tempered waters, “Are you included, Princess?”
There’s a pause, as you almost chuckle, but your laugh dying in your throat at his expression — that same smirk, but the way he looks at you stops your mind in its tracks — only one word rolling around in your head: what?
And your brow furrows, your lips parting in a response you don’t have — only questions, ones you don’t get to ask as Suguru slides in beside you.
“Sorry, I’m late,” Suguru sighs, the moment broken, and you don’t catch Satoru’s expression, too distracted by your cousin, “got stuck in a staff meeting,”
“I told you academia is hell,” you elbow him, and Suguru rolls his eyes, as he shrugs off his suit coat, “were these meetings the reasons you got held up or are they just an excuse so you didn’t have to help me?”
“Who said it can’t be both?” And he earns a smack to his shoulder, your attention turning back to Satoru, his gaze fixed outside.
“You’re unusually quiet, Satoru” Suguru kicks him lightly under the table, “not like you,”
He looks at you first — and you grasp the emotion he had hid before — what was it? Sadness? Longing? — right before it’s gone again as he slides his mask back on, grinning as he always does.
“What can I say? The view outside is much better than your ugly mug,” and the two of them begin to bicker, and you lean back in your seat, a smile pulling at your lips, even as you glanced back at Satoru.
And now you wondered if you would ever get an answer to your questions. Or maybe, you sipped your drink, it was better not to have it answered at all.
~~~
Satoru Gojo was eleven years old when he fell in love with you. It was from the moment he met you.
And there hasn’t been anyone else since.
He supposed it was inevitable in a way — since Suguru was his best friend, and his first, and when his family finally decided to enroll him in school, instead opting for private tutors, for the social aspect of making connections, of course. Because what else was your eleven year old son good for then helping to make future business deals easier?
But Satoru made friends with the one person who couldn’t help their deals — Suguru Geto, one of the only scholarship students in the entire school. And Satoru’s want to avoid spending his days with servants or on the rare occasion, dealing with his dad’s lecture for getting in another ‘disagreement’ with one of his classmates (that ended with that classmate crying after Satoru evaded his punch and kicked him in the shin), ended up with him at Suguru’s place. A lot.
Then soon enough, he was spending most of his summers there too. And that’s when he saw you.
“You said your cousin’s here? Is she nice?” Satoru asked, taking off his shoes, as Suguru shut the door behind them.
“She is, except when she’s being a pain about homework. And when she gets mad, she reminds me of my mom,” Suguru grimaced, as he walked past him, calling out for you. You rounded the corner, book in hand, and Satoru’s eyes grew wide.
“Hey Sugu, you brought a friend?” You walked over, still clad in your high school uniform, before introducing yourself, and offering him a warm smile, “it’s nice to meet you. I’m Suguru’s cousin,”
Satoru didn’t know what this feeling was — and he wouldn’t until a few more summers passed, and his hormones kicked in — but all he knew was that he would do anything to see you smile like that at him again. And he did — he would spend as much time as he could with you — talking to you about a test he aced, about something funny that happened at school, or even ratting on Suguru about what he was up to (earning him many knocks to the head by his best friend). But every time you smiled or laughed, it was worth it — worth every second he spent counting down the time to summer break so he could see you again.
But he didn’t know his seconds would run out so soon — and he only learned one random day going home with Suguru, from a snippet of a conversation he had with his mom.
“I know, I know she’s coming next week,” Satoru’s interest hadn’t been peaked by Suguru’s conversation until then, because he knew exactly who they were talking about. After all, you always came right at the start of break, and finally he could see you again — and maybe this time, he could tell you how he felt.
“I know, I know it’s her last time here so it has to be perfect,” and Satoru’s head snapped back to Suguru, last time? “I will,” and Suguru hangs up, a sigh on his lips, “my mom is being so annoying about my cousin. So what it’s her last time staying with us? It doesn’t mean we have to—“
“What do you mean it’s her last time?” Satoru kept his tone steady and slow, even as his heart thrummed against his ribs as if it was a xylophone, “she always comes every summer—“
“Of high school,” Suguru corrected him, “she is applying to university this year — most of them are abroad, and it seems likely she won’t be back in Japan, not for a while,” Suguru continued to complain on their way back to his place, but all Satoru could do was think about you.
It was your last summer with him. His last chance to make a move, to be something more than your younger cousin’s friend. His last chance to make you see him as a man, not a kid.
He had to confess, his fingers curled into fists, before the end of the summer. He would make you his girlfriend — one way or another.
And he did confess back then, Satoru thought, as he picked up a photo, wrinkled and yellowed at the corners, a picture that Suguru’s mom had taken of you and him the summer you had left. A candid of him and you looking at each other — one that Suguru’s mom had slipped to him with a knowing smile and a wink (one that had mortified him as a teenager).
He was always looking at you — no matter where he was, his eyes always found your form, a magnet to its opposite pole, and he didn’t know how to stop you from drawing him in. It had been over a decade and he still couldn’t.
He stared at your smiling face, the very same face that had looked at you with a smile fading to confusion this evening. He had gotten so close to asking you — to telling you how he felt — and he flips to the next picture, a scowl on his face as a picture of him and Suguru with his smug smile stared back at him. If only fucking Suguru hadn’t interrupted.
He shook his head, flipping back to his picture of you. This wasn’t the summer and he wasn’t a kid anymore. And you weren’t out of his reach, bound for another country across the ocean. No, you were here — only a short drive away.
And he made a promise to himself — he would get you to fall in love with him, before the end of this summer.
~~~
You hate first days.
“Did you see the guy waiting outside?” one woman whispered not so softly as you passed by.
“Yeah looks like he’s waiting for her,” the other’s lips formed a frown but only to hide her smirk.
From the time you were a kid, your first day of school was something you had all the time from your family moving around. You were always the new kid — the one who would be met with wide eyes and curiosity, only to be tossed aside a few days later.
But this was a fresh start that you had wanted — a new job far away from where you had started, with new responsibilities — a first day you had looked forward to, until it went so downhill.
And it was all your ex’s fault.
You texted Suguru — is it too early to quit on the first day?
He replies, well it’s been four hours, think you’ve lasted through one of my dad’s long winded stories longer than that. What happened?
You glanced outside towards the front of the building. It was more like ‘who happened?’
It was an innocuous enough morning, of introductions, trainings, orientation, and finally computer set up. You were rifling through your paperwork, trying to figure out what sheet looked the least daunting when someone called for you.
“There’s someone looking for you outside the lobby,” you saw a flurry of looks shared and smirks shot in your direction, and when you arrived downstairs you knew why.
What. The. Fuck.
You couldn’t help it. You bursted outside, “what are you doing here?” It was your ex — the very same ex who had started at the same overseas company after you both graduated and the one you had. And again, had chosen to follow you here.
“Waiting for you to change yer mind,” Naoya tilts his head, hands in his pocket, “and I know you will, because you love me,” he raises his voice to catch the eye of several passerby, and you grab his wrist, dragging him away.
“Fuck off,” you hiss under your breath, “I told you it’s over, and don’t you have a fucking job?”
“Did you forget? I’m rich, another reason ya can’t do better than me,” Naoya’s lips curl into that same grin, one you knew as charming once, until you saw past his pretty pink lips and glimpsed the sharp fangs behind them, “I took time off. Did ya think it was a coincidence we ended up at the same company?”
You gritted your teeth, “Naoya—“ and he breaks from your grip, instead his fingers dig into your wrist.
“All ya are is me. All that you have is me. And all you will have is me,” he dared closer, breath warming your lips, as he took hold of your other wrist and tugged you close, “the sooner you accept that, the better, doll,”
‘Doll.’ The term of endearment you had seen as precious to you. Something you always loved to hear roll off his tongue, the word you had learned to learned to reply to, even more than your own name. The one you regarded with such love had burned, burned until the flames licked your skin and knew what it really meant — a doll with strings, one he was meant to be the master of.
“Don’t call me that,” you rip your hands away, “leave. You’re embarrassing yourself,”
“Am I?” He tilts his head, jerking his head in the direction of your building where your offices had a clear view of this, “or am I just embarrassing you?”
You stared out the window for a moment and you knew he was still out there — judging but the way your phone was on the verge of suicide by notification, he was still very much there. And now, all people would know of you is the new worker with a crazy stalker ex.
I’m calling the police, Suguru’s text popped up, what’s your workplace’s address?
You think I hadn’t thought of that, Sugu? You sigh, he’s not doing anything. He’s on a public sidewalk. They can’t do anything to him.
Another text: when do you get out? You glance at the time, seeing another two coworkers whisper to each other, stealing looks.
An eternity — In another two hours.
I’ll handle it. Just wait in the lobby after work. And you frown.
Sugu, I can handle it. I don’t need you to come down here.
You always fought your battles. You didn’t need anything else to — or anyone else to pick them for you. Not even your baby cousin — no matter how sweet his intentions were.
Don’t worry. I’m not coming down. And you frown, staring at the text, before your phone rings, and you groan as ‘Assistant Director’ flashes on the screen.
You were so fired.
You weren’t — as you shut the door of his office behind you. However, he did advise you that this company had a strict no nonsense policy and did want personal drama to be dredged up in the office. And you were given the day to sort out your “mess.”
You scrub a hand down your face, but it wasn’t even your mess, and how would you fix it? He wasn’t going to listen to you. You sit at your desk, packing up your bag for the day. And your phone vibrates.
Come down.
You hesitate, But he’s still downstairs.
Just go.
Fuck. You sling your bag over your shoulder, piercing eyes digging into your back, vultures circling an already dead carcass, whispering still even as the elevators doors shut.
And you almost wish they never opened when you see what’s waiting for you outside.
Fuck.
You grit your teeth, stomach in absolute knots as if to brace yourself for the complete shitstorm you’re about to deal with.
“Satoru?”
Satoru Gojo leaned back against his expensive (likely imported) car, shiny as it was new, sunglasses glinting in the light, but not brighter than the grin he gives you. He holds out your favorite drink, a tilt of his head.
“Are you ready to go?”
You glance around, as he places the drink in your hand, “But what about—“
“Let go of me!”
Satoru’s lips curl, sliding his sunglasses down the bridge of his nose, “Oh, I’ve gotten him handled,”
Naoya stood between two men restraining him, both in suits, as his face contorted in anger, veins bulging, eyes darting between the two of you, “Do you know who I am? I’m the heir to the Zenin Corporation — you cannot treat me like this. I’ll have you—“
“Heir? Really?” Satoru stepped forward, blocking him from your view, “is that right? I thought the Zenin hadn’t decided announced a successor yet,”
You furrow your brow — how does Satoru— but then you’re being put into a car with Satoru’s arm curled around your waist, as he opens the door and tucks you into the passenger seat.
And now you won’t know. At least not now.
Naoya scoffed, “And who are you to know anything about—“
“Have you heard of the Six Eyes Corp,” and Naoya’s eyes narrow, “you should have because we account for a large chunk of your business. And if that support were to disappear,” he flashes his blue eyes at him over the rim of his sunglasses, “I’d hate to tell them it’s because of this,”
“You fucking liar, like you could tell anyone anything—“
Satoru chuckles, “You’re right, I am a liar,” he runs his fingers through his hair, “I don’t need to tell anyone. Except my father,”
Naoya’s sneer fades into confusion, his eyes narrowed, “Don’t fucking tell me—”
“Then I won’t,” he steps forward, hands slipping into his pockets, “but if you ever step in her presence again,” he jerks his head towards you in his car, “then I will, and you don’t wanna know what happens if I do,” he steps in front of Naoya, back blocking your view so you don’t see him grab Naoya’s wrist, blue eyes aflame with something far deeper than anger, “because it will much worse,” he squeezes Naoya’s wrist hard making him flinch as he grits his teeth at Satoru’s smiling face, “who knows? Maybe I’ll break your wrist next time.”
He turns around, waving off the guards, as he makes his way back to his car, sliding into the driver’s seat, smile fading to concern.
“Are you alright, Princess?” You’re watching those people drag Naoya away, his hateful gaze trying and failing to get a last look at you as the guard takes a hand to the back of his head to force his gaze forward.
“Where are they taking him?”
Satoru starts the car, the quiet rumble of the engine filling the silence of his pause, “just to the proper authorities. He won’t bother you again,”
You bit your bottom lip, eyes burning with tears — and you don’t know whether if it’s embarrassment or relief, “I’m sorry—“
“Don’t finish that sentence,” and your eyes slide to his, a soft smile on his lips, “you don’t have anything to be sorry about. Or to thank me for,” he cuts you off as your lips part, “is your wrist okay?”
You glance down and see the slight redness still lingered, a final parting gift, and your other hand closes over the wrist, “it hurts a little, but I’ll ice it when I get home,”
“We’ll go to a hospital to have it looked at,” and you’re shaking your head.
“I don’t want to sit—“
“Then I’ll hire a doctor to come see you,” and you stare at him, as he rolls to a stop at a red light…is that a pout? “I just want you to be ok, Princess, please,”
You bite back a small smile, and ignore the flutter in your heart, “Fine, you win, let’s go to a walk-in clinic,” and you spot his shoulders relax, “but it’s not really fair when you give me your infamous pout,”
He raises an eyebrow, “‘Infamous?’”
“You used to whip that out all the time on me and on my aunt when you were a kid — it did always work,”
“Not always,” he replies, as he turns into the parking for the walk-in clinic, “in fact, I remember a time that it specifically did not work,”
“And when was that?” You tilt your head.
And he smiles, “When I asked you to be my girlfriend,” and you furrow your brow, nearly forgetting the memory, until it hits you.
“Oh my god, the last summer I spent here,” you covered your mouth with the tips of your fingers, a chuckle on your lips, “you were very direct,”
“I could say the same about you,” and you roll your eyes.
“You were a kid. You were way too young for me, you know that,” you unbuckle your seatbelt, “plus now I bet you could get any person you want. That’s why I was surprised why you didn’t have a girlfriend,”
“Like I said, there’s only one woman in the world for me,” his eyes find yours, cerulean bathed in sunlight, light catching across his irises, “and only one woman I ever wanted to be with,”
Oh.
Oh.
No, no, that couldn’t be it — you couldn’t be her, not after all this time—
You blink, “Satoru, you don’t—“
“Well our age difference isn’t a problem anymore is it?” Your brain is struggling to process, lips parting with no words, “Princess,” his fingers brush yours, gently grazing your hand, as your gaze finds his again, “when are you going to take me seriously?”
“Satoru—“
“Just don’t say no,” Satoru cuts you off, pulling his hand away, “don’t say no and think about it,” you open your mouth only to waver at the sight of the pout on his lips and you sigh.
It was hard to say no, especially right now.
“Okay I won’t say no,” you slip from the car, lips breaking into a wide grin, before sticking your head inside, “don’t smile like that. It’s not a yes,” you huff, cheeks burning and stomach erupting in butterflies.
“Not yet,” Satoru says as you shut the door, “not yet, Princess.”
~~~
“Huh? You did what?”
You loved your aunt. You really did. She and her husband had taken you in when your parents were too busy working to properly take care of you during the summers. But times like this reminded you—
—-she truly was her mother’s sister.
“Well your mother was telling me that you haven’t dated anyone since you’ve been back—“
“It's only been a month!” You had barely finished getting unpacked, and in fact, you still had at least five boxes still stacked up in the closet, “I’m not interested in dating, I’m trying to focus on work,” you rubbed the back of your head, “new topic, please,” as you sip on your drink.
And after the debacle Naoya had caused, you needed to — you had put up with the whispers and stares for a few days, but since Naoya had stayed away, the rumors faded with time. Now things had died down for the most part. Except for—
“Has Satoru still been picking you up?” You nearly do a spit take, but instead you choke down the water, coughing, “eh? Are you okay, honey?”
“I’m fine, I’m fine,” your cheeks burn at the thought of Satoru — he was always a bold kid, but you didn’t think he’d confess to being in love with you all this time. Especially now as a man — and not a kid, “yeah he’s still picking me up,”
When he had confessed to you all those years ago as a young teenager, you had thought nothing of it. Except that it was a crush on his best friend’s older cousin — something that would pass easily with time. You hadn’t even thought of it in all these years.
But now, you couldn’t stop thinking about him.
Especially when he kept showing up to pick you up from work. And now you were stirring other sorts of rumors.
After he had taken you to the walk-in clinic, he had driven you home, making sure to check if your place was secure enough, and that you weren’t too shaken up.
“Are you sure you don’t want me to drop you off to Suguru’s?” he had asked, crossing his arms, “I could also drag his ass here, he owes me anyway,”
“No, no I’m really fine,” you chewed your lip, looking down, “you sure he’s not going to come back?” and he leans down, forcing you to meet his gaze, as he tilts his head.
“Sweetheart, you think I’d even leave your place if I thought there was a chance of him coming back?” he offers you a smile, and you scoff softly, shaking your head, “trust me, he won’t be bothering you again, not while I’m around,” and he added, “and I’m not going anywhere.”
And you didn’t know what to do with the promise in his words. Because you knew he meant that — in more than one way.
But even so, he hadn’t brought up his confession — not once.
“He’s so sweet isn’t he? Suguru is always so busy but Satoru’s making time to pick you instead,” your aunt gushes, and you shake your head, your aunt did have a habit of being a little hard on her son, “by the way, would you mind stopping by the house today?”
“Why’s that?”
And well, how did you end up here?
You stood in front of the entrance to a very expensive looking building with a very intimidating doorman, with a large tote bag full of food that your aunt had insisted you drop off. She had given you his address, but by the time you arrived, you realized that you didn’t even have his number. And now Suguru or your aunt weren’t picking up their phones.
Fuck.
You were internally debating whether to talk to the doorman or to just go home and deal with this another time, when you heard someone speak behind you.
“Looking for someone?” You jump slightly, whirling when you see Satoru, hands in his pockets, a smile on his lips, as he lifts his sunglasses to meet your gaze, “didn’t think I’d find you hanging outside my apartment building, princess,”
“Well, you show up outside my workplace and I’ll be showing up outside your apartment building,” the words leave your mouth without much thought, as your cheeks burn at the implication, “I mean—”
“Is that supposed to discourage me from picking you up?” he grins, “Doesn’t sound like a bad deal to me,”
You roll your eyes, before holding up the bag, “My aunt asked me to drop off some dishes for you. She’s worried you’re eating too many sweets,”
He takes the bag from your hand, fingers brushing, as he shakes his head, “I shouldn’t have ever told her that I had cake for dinner,” and you snort, unable to hide your giggles, “what’s so funny?”
“I can see a lot about you has changed, but your sweet tooth is just as bad as when you were a kid,” and you see him scratch the back of his head, “is your favorite dessert still mochi?”
“You still remember that about me?” A smile pulling at his lips, and your cheeks burn, but you refuse to waver.
“Well, it’s hard to forget you threw up all over the rug when you ate too many,” You bite back a smile when you spot the tips of his ears burn red, as he gapes at you.
“Did you have to bring that up?” He mutters, a small pout on his lips, and you snort, as he can’t help the curl of his lips, “now, c’mon,” his fingers brush the small of your back.
“Satoru, where—“ but his hand is firm as he guides you towards his building.
He flashes you a grin as he signs you in with the doorman, “Do you think I’d let you come all this way without staying for dinner?”
~~~
“Do you want anything to drink?” Satoru’s penthouse was nothing less than immaculate — high ceilings, pristine floors, and an interior designed living space. You swore in some places it was still shiny — and you felt very out of place in your casual wear for the weekend.
“Just a water,” you reply, as he opens his refrigerator and you raise an eyebrow at the fully stocked compartments, “wow,” you murmur, and he’s pulling a water and a fancy looking juice out of it.
“What was that?” He raises a brow, and you stammer a moment, “c’mon princess, share with the class,”
“Just surprised your refrigerator isn’t just stuffed with just desserts, sweets, and ice cream,” and he hands you your water, before sitting beside you, spread out on the couch, as he always was.
“Oh it is, it’s just very well hidden,” and you snort, as he throws his arm over the back of the couch, “I may be an adult but I’m not going to be a boring old geezer like my father,”
“I don’t think I could ever see you becoming boring, Satoru,” you chuckle, and he tilts his head.
“Is that a rare compliment from you, princess?” And his grin only makes your cheeks warm, as you roll your eyes.
“More like an observation,” you reply, as your phone vibrates in your pocket, and you pull it out to check — who would be messaging you now?
Oh fuck.
“You ok there?”
No, no you weren’t. Because your lovely aunt had given your number to a prospective match, and now he was texting you. A lot.
“It’s nothing,” you sigh, shaking your head, putting your phone on ‘do not disturb.” You would have dinner first, and then you’d murder your aunt after dessert, “do you want me to help take out dinner?”
“You expect me to believe you don’t hire a chef to make these sides?” The food was spread out across the table, many of the dishes your aunt had made plated and presented, but along with sides that Satoru had made, “Suguru had made it seem as if the only thing you ever made was microwave ramen,”
“Well jokes on him, I burned it the one time I tried,” he grinned, “but I did learn to cook, I just never bothered to cook for Suguru,”
“And why’s that?” You take a bite of the pickled radish he had prepared.
“Because I’m not trying to impress him, am I?” And you nearly choke slightly, as you manage to swallow, “you should know I’m so much more than a pretty face, Princess,”
You sigh, “Satoru—“
“Have you thought about what I said at all?”
And you had. A lot more than you cared to admit. Especially after all he had done. Everything he had to Naoya to defend you. And just about him — how sweet he’s been, how protective, how kind, and how you’d like nothing more than to do the same for him—
But…
“I have, but Satoru, our ages—“
“We’re both adults. We both graduated. We haven’t seen each other in over a decade,” his leg brushes yours as he shifts closer, “are you telling me you don’t feel anything?”
You didn’t know how to answer that — not when you didn’t really know yourself. And you always knew the answer — you knew you wanted to study abroad, you knew you had to leave Naoya’s company, and you knew you wanted to live here — so why was this the one time you didn’t? And why was he the one thing you were unsure of?
You bite your bottom lip, “But, Suguru—“ and he scoffs softly.
“Are you really thinking about Suguru right now?” he asks, “or would you rather date the guy blowing up your phone earlier?”
Your eyebrows knit together, “How did you know—“
“Well I know it’s not Naoya, and I heard from Suguru that your aunt wanted to set you up,” fucking Suguru—and your lips twist into a pout, he tilts his head, not bothering to hide his smile, “if you dated me, you could get your aunt off your back,” he muses, leaning against his elbow, “she always did say I was family, and I’m not looking to be your brother,”
Your cheeks burn at his words, “Satoru,”
“Think about it, Princess, you don’t have to give me an answer now,” but his eyes flicker to your phone, “but I know you’ll find me once you meet any one of these guys your aunt sets you up with,”
You grimace at your phone, picking it up to see the messages from the guy your aunt had given your number to, “fuck,” you murmur, locking your phone before tossing it away, an image of you trapped at a dinner across the most boring man alive. And then you glance up at Satoru, still a smug smile on his lips, and then back to your phone.
“What’s your plan?”
~~~
“So, I heard you turned down the boy I gave your number to,”
Your aunt hardly pulled punches.
She never did when you and Suguru were growing up — she always knew what the two of you got up to, even if you were both sure she could never find out — she always did. Even the one time that the two of you had snuck out to get ramen on a late night, Suguru’s parents were in a dead sleep — but by the time you both snuck back in, she was waiting for both of you in the hallway. But this time, she wasn’t even leading with a wind-up before swinging.
And then she adds, eyes narrowing, “He said you declined because you’re dating someone,”
She was going for the kill.
She turns to grab the whistling tea kettle, turning it off, before pouring the hot water into two cups. You force yourself not to bite your bottom lip, the smallest tell was dangerous, even with her back turned, “Is there anything he didn’t tell you?” She’s placing the tea cups one by one on the tray, as if laying out her pieces on a board only to corner you.
Your aunt frowns, “His mother told me,” great, even better — he was a momma’s boy, and now you were starting to wonder just how many bullets did you dodge, “are you seeing someone?”
You were beginning to regret this plan — and you don’t know why you let Satoru talk you into it.
“You want me to do what?” You stared at Satoru as if he had suggested going diving with sharks, which is not far from what he was suggesting, “tell my aunt that we’re together. No way,”
“Aw, am I that embarrassing to date, Princess?” And you roll your eyes.
“Yes, for me,” and he’s tilting his head, “my aunt will immediately tell my uncle and Suguru — and I don’t know which one of them would kill you first,” your uncle wasn’t one for words or conflict, but he had a soft spot for you — and a fist for anyone that tried to come date you without his approval.
“Eh? Doesn’t Uncle like me?” And you snort, the one sided conversations that Satoru had with your uncle that usually ended with your uncle excusing himself to get away from that “annoying moron.”
“He doesn’t hate you but,” you choose your words carefully, “he doesn’t prefer you,”
Satoru scoffs, crossing his arms, “Well Auntie loves me, and I had a plan for this,” and she did, she had quite the soft spot for Satoru, ever since he was a kid. You couldn’t exactly blame her — he looked like an angel, even if the words that left his mouth made it seem like the contrary, his fingers brushing against a strand of your hair, “and soon I’ll make you love me too,”
Fucking cocky bastard, you thought to yourself, cheeks burning at the thought of the smirk on his lips, but you’re jarred back to reality as you hear the clattering of cups and spoons.
“I am,” you reply, and your aunt’s head whips around, the clinking of the glasses cutting through the pause, “it’s new,” you add, as she sets down the tea cups, placing the tea dispensers in each one, “I wasn’t sure if I should say anything,”
“Why wouldn’t you? This is wonderful,” she blinked, and her brow wrinkles, “unless it’s that Naoya—“ you flinch at the thought of him.
“No, I’m done with him,” you wave her off quickly, wrinkling your nose at the thought of that bastard, grabbing the tea cup, the scent of green tea wafting from the steam that warmed your face, as you blew air to cool it off, “it’s someone I reconnected with here,”
Your aunt raises an eyebrow, “So soon? Is it someone from work?” Again, is the word she implies with the sentence, a sharp tone that nicked your armor.
“No, it isn’t,” and she’s sipping her tea, and you take a sip only to burn your tongue, “but he is younger,”
“That’s not a problem if he’s not too much younger — how old is he?” and this was exactly why you hadn’t wanted to tell your aunt, it was more of an interrogation than a conversation.
“He’s about Suguru’s age,” and she’s tilting her head, “Suguru introduced us,” and that wasn’t a lie — it was true — both in the past and now.
“Really? And Sugu is okay with you dating his friend?” Your aunt may be gossip and a meddler, but she wasn’t a fool, your hesitation is your end, “and I assume you’re telling me all this to get me off your case and to ask not to tell Suguru,” she sighs.
“Auntie—“
“You know I don’t like lying for either of you—“
“But—“
“No, I can’t—“
“How about lying for me?” Satoru stands in the doorway, head tilted, a smile on his lips. And your aunt blinks before she slowly puts the puzzle pieces together, a mix of emotions crossing her expression — confusion, disbelief, and maybe a hint of joy, before she settled on a neutral
“Satoru—“
He frowns, “Auntie, you know Suguru will kill me for dating his cousin, please,” and then he does what he does best — pouting.
And your aunt breaks — with a one hit-KO.
“You must have been blessed by some needlessly annoying god,” you murmur as he walks you back to your place, sun gleaming as it gave off its last rays of light before setting for the night, “because I don’t know how you still get her to fall for that,”
“I was born blessed,” and you snort, as you catch sight of his smile out of the corner of your eye, “and speaking of which, when’s our first date?”
“Straight to the point, huh?” You stop walking, hands in your pockets, “Satoru—“
“Don’t tell me you’re about to launch into another speech about how you can’t date me,” he gives an exaggerated sigh, “I could go back to your aunt and tell her how you broke my heart and let her pull out list of aunties who have sons who are excited to meet you—“
“Alright, fine, a date, but one thing first,” you step close to him, making his breath catch, pretty blues finding your gaze, the very same he would love to get lost in, before they flicker down to your lips. And he swears you can probably hear his heart beating out of his chest, thumping at the bony bars of his ribcage, and he hates it, hates how you have him twisted around your finger without trying, “Princess—“
You reach for him, fingers nearly about to brush his cheek, his eyes fluttering, before you flick his forehead, “ow!”
“I was just going to ask when our first date is going to be, but if you rather I go on a bunch of blind dates—“ and he’s shaking his head, rubbing his forehead all the same, “then do you have any ideas?”
He grins, “Plenty, but there’s one in particular.”
~~~~
“An amusement park?”
He sat next to you, driving, hand on the console and you couldn’t help but brush your arm against his each time you moved — and you felt as if he did it on purpose.
He raises an eyebrow, stealing a glance out of the corner of his eye, “Uh-huh, got a problem, Princess?”
“No I’m just surprised, we went to plenty of these as kids,” you glanced at him, his eyes concentrated on the road, fingers curling a little tighter around the steering wheel.
You had raised an eyebrow at his choice, but now that you were here…it wasn’t a bad pick.
You hadn’t been to one in years — not since your summers with Suguru. The screams in the distance told you there was a rollercoaster not far off, the syrupy sweetness of sugar somehow emanated from every inch of air, and the park was filled to the brim with families and couples.
You glance at Satoru, a plain t-shirt and shorts, and somehow he still looked as if he stepped off a page of a men’s style magazine. He looked around, his eyes landing on a vendor selling cotton candy, and you hid your chuckle.
“C’mon,” you took his hand, leading him over without a second thought, and you’re grabbing a giant cotton candy for him, made into a flower by the vendor. Satoru’s practically vibrating with excitement, slinking his hand around to sneak the vendor money before you even had a chance, “I wanted to pay—“
“You think I’d make my date pay?” He takes a bite out of his cotton candy, sugar sticking to his lips even as he nearly inhales a petal, “even the arranged set ups should do that much,” but it’s hard to take him seriously with blue sugar all over his mouth, “what?”
You snort, grabbing a wet nap from your purse,“Well, you’d be surprised,” and you wipe his face, fingers cupping his chin, “some guys are a little immature,” and he stares back, and you swear you see a flush settle over his cheeks, before he turns away to wipe his lips.
“Not me,” he mumbles, tips of his ears burning red, and you bite your bottom lip, cute.
“Should we find a ride to go on?” he immediately grins at that, offering his arm this time, and you take it, a smile tugging at your lips.
Maybe this wasn’t so bad after all.
~~~
Oh you were wrong.
So wrong.
“I changed my mind, I don’t want to get on,” and before you can leave a hand catches you by the wrist gently, blue eyes judging over his rimless sunglasses, “Satoru—“
“It’s just a rollercoaster,” just a rollercoaster? No, it was literally your death. You stared up at the contraption above you, the echoing screams growing louder as the line crept forward — akin to a rickety boat that Charon would wade you across into hell itself.
“No, I can’t—“ you shake your head.
“C’mon it won’t be that bad—“
“So you admit it’s going to be bad,” and he’s biting back a smile, “what?”
“I just never really saw you being scared of anything, Princess,” he sighed loudly, “I guess I’ll have to ride it all alone,” but that only serves to make many women (and men) stare at him as if to offer him their company.
“You have options,” and he shakes his head, his hand outstretched as the two of you enter the final stretch of the line.
“Like I said, sweetheart, there’s only ever been one option for me,” and your fingers graze his with several second thoughts, but when his fingers laced with yours, you knew there was no turning back.
“I didn’t know you could scream that loud,”
You grinned at a shaken up Satoru, throat probably raw and aching as he frowns, face turned away, “I’m not used to the speed, unlike you, from how I heard you drive,” and you bite back a laugh, as he fails to hide his flush from you, his ears burning red.
Your chuckle is a badly disguised cough, “Are you pretending to be this way to make me feel better?” You tease, and he’s crossing his arms.
“No way I’d let myself look so lame in front of you, I’m no better than Ijichi,” and you raise an eyebrow. Ijichi was a boy in Suguru and Satoru’s class when they were kids — one that Satoru loved to complain about being slow.
“You still think about him?”
“He’s my assistant,” and you snort at the thought of Satoru still hassling that poor guy.
“I hope you pay him well,” he’s officially pouting again.
“I didn’t know it would be that intense!” you tilt your head, as the two of you find a corner of the park that’s not so crowded and riddled with children running amok, and you watch him down a sugary soda drink he had bought from one of the food stalls.
“You act as if you’ve never been to an amusement park,” he’s quiet for a second too long, and your eyebrows knit together, “but Suguru—”
“You guys would go every summer, but it was when I had my prep classes on the weekends,” he runs his fingers through his white locks, “I would have skipped when I was older, but by the time I had stopped caring what my father thought of me, you had already gone to college and Suguru’s family stopped going,”
You frown — you knew Satoru didn’t have the best upbringing — yes he had every opportunity at his fingertips, all the money in the world that you couldn’t even fathom, but you could count the number of times he’s mentioned his parents on one hand.
“I was always so jealous when you guys would go,” he sighed, a small smile pulling at the corner of his lips, “it seems silly now—”
“No, it’s not,” you cut him off, shaking your head, “you should have been allowed to be a kid,”
He chuckles, a noise that sticks in your chest, “Well, more than anything, I wanted to go with you,” his cerulean eyes find yours, a soft smile on his lips, “thank you for indulging me, princess,”
“Well, you’re the one doing me a favor, right?” you tease, getting to your feet, “c’mon we have plenty of other things to do — I saw a booth with candy apples not too far over there—” you point, and his fingers are already finding yours as he nearly drags you along, a laugh caught in your throat as you can’t help but smile at his excitement.
It’s infectious, you thought as the two of you got in line, Satoru nearly vibrating with need for his sugar fix, and you shook your head, biting back a laugh, just like him.
~~~
“You don’t have to walk me home,” the sun had long sunk by the time you both had left, staying to catch a glimpse of the fireworks before heading back, “it’s not that far from here,”
The two of you had opted to take public transport to the amusement park, knowing there would be next to nowhere to park or rather only the middle of nowhere to park. The cicadas were already beginning their symphony, filling the relative silence of the neighborhood now, except for the chatter heard from inside houses or outside in gardens.
“Who would carry your loot home?” and he tilts the giant plushie to show his unimpressed face, “you barely wanted to carry this at the park, even after you begged me to win it, and I did, in one shot,”
And he did, he had won you a giant polar bear plushie nearly as tall as you were in his hands, along with several bags of sweets he had bought on the way out, just to snack on tonight (and you seriously wondered if he ate anything that was not coated in mochi, chocolate, or sugar).
“I don’t remember begging you — I asked you,” you cross your arms, and you know he’s smiling behind the bear, using the plushie to hide his goddamn smirk, “i did! I just asked if we could try to win it—”
“And I remember the phrases ‘please’ and ‘i need it’ being involved in the conversation,” you felt your cheeks burn, “you still like these things, huh?”
“What do you mean?” and he moves the polar bear under one arm, the bags in the other so you could actually see his face.
“You always loved plushies, you had that one from your parents that you kept in your room with you all the time—”
“Panda, I was very original with that name,” you shake your head, before your gaze turns to him, his sunglasses gleaming on his head in the low light of the streetlamps, “I can’t believe you remembered that,”
“There’s barely a thing I’d forget when it comes to you,” and you bite your lip, heart squeezing at his words, “you look like you wanna say something, princess?”
You reached the outside of your apartment building just as night fell, humidity still clinging to the thick summer air. The light of the lobby spilling out into the sidewalk through the glass doors, just as the streets grew quieter.
And you do — you’re not sure if you should ask it — a question posed on a precipice of uncertainty that you didn’t know if you wanted to step off of. But you know you had to, at one point or another.
You could just go inside, brush off his question, and leave the day at that. But a nagging question had wriggled it’s way to the forefront of your mind, and you knew it wouldn’t leave your mind until it left your tongue.
You chew on your lip, “You say these things so easily when it comes to me, but how are you so sure?”
And he shrugs, his eyes not leaving yours for even a second, “I just know,”
“But how?” He’s shaking his head, stepping forward, until he’s a breath away, your eyes flickering from his gaze to his lips for a split second, your own air caught in your traitorous throat.
“Instead of wondering why I feel why I do, I think you should wonder why you’re so unsure,” and his fingers graze your cheek, tilting your chin upwards, his touch sending heat to the far reaches of your body, and he’s leaning forward. Your eyes nearly flutter shut, as his words nearly warm your lips, but no, instead they brush against your ear, “because if I was still just that kid to you that I was all those years ago, then why aren’t you pulling away?”
Your eyes blink open, as he pulls away, grin on his lips, as he hands you your polar bear plushie, “Satoru—“ and you don’t even know what you want to say — you want to argue, you want to say something, anything, but nothing comes out but his name.
“You shouldn’t let a guy get that close, Princess, especially not twice,” he sighs, lips still curled, “because if you let me that close again, I won’t be leaving without a kiss,”
And you could only stare after him as he left — fingers touching your ear he had whispered against, lips pursing, as you huff, cheeks burning as you step inside your building, burying your face in white fluff of the polar bear that looked a little too much like someone’s hair.
“Idiot.”
~~~~
You’re avoiding me.
Satoru wasn’t wrong. You were — but not exactly on purpose. Or at least you didn’t think so. It had been the third time you had turned him down in the last week. Although, today’s wasn’t intentionally so. You stewed in a corner of the bar, eyes glancing at your phone — what was really an appropriate time to leave a work-sanctioned event without looking completely anti-social?
It was never really fun coming to these events alone — but you knew if Satoru was here, you’d actually have a good time. You were almost surprised he hadn’t shown up at your place or your work to see you — all he had done is text you. And why did that almost disappoint you?
You checked the time again, met with the notification of Satoru’s message again before you swiped it away out of sight. But he wasn’t out of mind. He hadn’t been for days. You rubbed at your temples — you hadn’t gotten a good night’s sleep since your day at the amusement park, thoughts spinning in circles and it was all his fault. You had done everything to get him out of your head — minimize contact, not see him, even drag yourself to an event like this — but still, you stared at your phone screen again, the ghost of his words still warming your ear.
You couldn’t stop thinking about him.
Fuck. What were you doing? You took a long swig of your drink, hoping the alcohol could erase some of that night out of your mind. The last thing you needed to be thinking about was Satoru Gojo.
“So who’s the guy who has been picking you up after work?”
You nearly choked on your drink. Really? You downed your drink, hoping you can ignore the question if you take long enough downing the searing concoction that the bartender had handed you, maybe they would let you off the hook. But as you finish the drink, you only find your coworkers staring back at you still. The hush that fell over this group of women was far too reverent for a conversation about a man.
“He’s my little cousin’s best friend,” you reply, ordering another drink — you were going to need it, and the women exchange glances, fake smiles plastered on their lips.
“He’s not your boyfriend?” and a strange twinge settles in your chest at the question, poking and prodding your tongue to say no, no he wasn’t, but you almost didn’t want to.
“No, he isn’t,” and the women grin amongst each other, “if you would excuse me—”
“Wait, wait, we just started talking, come on now,” you sigh internally, as they order another round of drinks as they corral you to their table, maybe after this you could finally leave.
~~~
“What’s got you so down?” Suguru slides into a seat across from Satoru — Satoru who couldn’t stop checking his phone to see if you had replied.
“What do you mean?” he sighs, he shouldn’t have sent that text earlier. He shouldn’t push so much, he’s already pushed enough with his comment. God, why the fuck did he say that? What if you thought he was a creep—what if you thought he was disgusting? What if—
“You look pathetic,” Suguru sips his coffee in his hand, scrolling through his phone, “who is it?”
Satoru sits up, locking his phone, tucking it away as if it would incriminate him — flashing your name across the screen like it was plastered over his mind, “what do you mean?”
“I’ve never seen you like this, you keep checking your phone — you barely can keep track of it most of the time,” he shrugs his shoulders, “I figured you must have grew a dick and started liking someone,”
“Look who’s talking — when’s the last time you dated someone again?” And Satoru catches the crumpled up paper Suguru tosses, “don’t get on your high horse if you don’t want the same thing back,”
“At least I’m not waiting like a lovesick puppy over my phone,” Suguru mutters, taking another sip of his drink, and that’s when a phone ringing cuts through the silence — that was your ringtone, the very one he set to know when you’d call — just so he wouldn’t miss it, “looks like your waiting by the door paid off,”
“Fuck off,” Satoru mumbled, walking off with his phone as he picked up, “hello?”
“Suguru!” Satoru’s brow furrowed at the sound of your cousin’s name leaving your lips, “can you pick me up plz—“ your words were slurred, sounds of chatter cutting through the background.
“Princ—“ you hiccuped, a small groan leaving your lips.
“You can’t tell Satoru, he’ll come here and my coworkers won’t stop asking me about him,” you sigh again, mumbling, “why does he have to be so—ugh, it’s not fair for someone to be that pretty—“
Pretty?
His cheeks burned, as he covered his mouth with his hand, trying and failing to bite back a stupid smile on his lips — it’s not fair for you to be this cute. He would have preferred ‘handsome’ or ‘perfect’ or ‘your boyfriend’ — but he could settle for pretty.
“Anyway!” You cut his thoughts off, “could you come get me?” And Satoru bit his lip, glancing at Suguru — he could tell Suguru to get you, he could, but the odds of you letting something slip to Suguru—- “remember you can’t tell Satoru—“
—was really high.
“Don’t worry, I’ll be right there, and I won’t tell him,” he adds, because you already had.
~~~
“How did you find out where I work?” Satoru didn’t know after so many years that there were still new things to learn about you still — and one thing he had learned tonight was that —- you pouted at him, stumbling slightly as he came to a stop in front of your building — you were really whiny when drunk.
“I picked you up there, remember?” he lightly flicked your forehead that only made you huff, “now do you have your keys?”
“Do you know how annoying you are?” And he has to bite back a laugh at your scrunched up face.
“I do, sweetheart, but I’d love to hear you tell me,” you scoff, crossing your arms only to immediately uncross to dig through your purse for your keys, tossing out several things that Satoru catches or picks up.
“You come to my work and pick me up, and act all swoon worthy, and perfect, and you look like that—“
“Like what?” he can’t hide his smile this time, and your brow furrows as you pull out your keys, lips opening and closing, until you purse them.
“Like that,” you grumble as you teeter on your feet again, before he supports you, and he swore he heard you mumble, “so disgustingly handsome,”
And he’s glad your eyes are half closed and focused ahead, otherwise he knew you’d smack him for the grin on his face.
“Oi, don’t—“ and you don’t listen, nearly falling over as you unlock your door, whole body weight leaned against it, but his arm slips around you, holding you up from face planting into your floor, “you’re gonna break your neck, Princess,”
“You wouldn’t let that happen,” You break from his grip and lean up close, your breath warming his lips, your gaze half lidded, “not when you love me,” and his heart thuds against his ribs, rattling his lungs and bones alike, “that’s what you said, right?”
You weren’t making this easy, not with your fingers now sliding up his chest, toying with the top button of his shirt, “I did—“
“So are you going to prove it?” And the floor feels as if it slips out from underneath him, and all he feels is you, only you — the brush of your fingers against his chest, the faint scent of lavender from your perfume that your aunt had gifted you, and the caress of your gaze against his lips, the same eyes he could easily lose himself in — if he wasn’t careful.
But he had to be careful — because it was you.
“But—“
“But what?” it would be so easy to kiss you, when you were only half a breath away, lips parted and gaze asking him to do so, to just lean in—but he can’t.
Not like this.
His thumb runs down your lips, your eyes fluttering shut, fingers sliding to cup your jaw, and he leans in — feeling your breath catch—
But he only flicks your forehead, drawing a soft yelp from you.
“I’d like you to remember our first kiss,” and he’s corralling you into bed after that, your body keeling over into the soft mattress, as he’s able to wriggle you under the comforter. Your body relaxes into the plush bed, eyes shut, as your muscles loosen and unwind, while Satoru stands over you, the exact opposite — muscles taut and mind whirring.
Fuck.
“You never make it easy, do you, Princess?” he mutters under his breath, swallowing thickly as he scrubs a hand down his face, “good night,” his fingers ghost over the swell of your cheek, before turning to leave—
And your fingers caught him around the wrist, eyes half open as you stared up at him, a pout on your lips but now for an entirely different, but somehow the same reason—
“Stay,” one word nearly had him crumble right there — and how pathetic was that? Maybe Suguru was right — he was no better than a puppy at your beck and call — waiting by the door for his master to return. And he almost didn’t mind — if you always came home to him.
“Princess, you have to go to sleep—“ he could easily break from your grip, fingers wrapped loosely around his wrist, but your grasp may have been very well made of iron with how you had pinned him into place — an entomologist pinning their butterfly in their display.
“Don’t wanna sleep alone,” a slight whine in your voice makes him waver again, but he had a problem with sleeping beside you—
He shifted in place, adjusting himself, a somewhat big problem thst wouldn’t go away — no matter how many times he thought about Gakuganji in his underwear — especially when you were looking at him like that, half dressed in bed with a pout on your lips and want in your gaze—want that he never thought would be for him.
“Please?” And that’s all it takes, his thumb rubbing against your fingers — because he could never say no to you.
~~~~
“Are you okay?”
Satoru was never left alone — not since he had managed to wander off alone when he was five. It took several hours and a dozen security guards to find him at a bakery, having his third piece of cake. And when he was brought home, he was told just how many ways that could have went wrong — what could have happened to him, and most of all — how badly it could have made his parents look.
After that, he couldn’t remember a time that his hand wasn’t clutched by a caretaker or escort — from school to home to anywhere else he wished to go. But he never wished to go anywhere, not with a stranger at his side.
It was only when he met Suguru that he was allowed to go out without someone hovering over his shoulder. But without warning — warning that if any incident would mean he would be stuck back in his daily life. But that meant when he got distracted in the pastry section of the supermarket — looking for the exclusive mochi he desperately wanted — he found himself alone, with you and Suguru nowhere in sight.
“Suguru?” Satoru called, head whipping around, chest thudding as the white noise of the market grew louder. His gaze falls, ears ringing with all that could go wrong, back to the life with no one at his side, only strangers—
“Toru?” Satoru’s gaze snaps up, your hands on your hips, your head tilted, “you okay?” And he’s quickly wiping away his tears, sniffling softly, your hand finding the top of his head, “i got you something,” and you hold out a mochi in front of him, and he blinks.
“You found it?” He’s blinking and your lips curve into a pretty smile.
“Anything for you, Satoru,” your fingers run through his hair, “Satoru? Satoru—“
His eyes flutter open, finding you leaning over him, your tousled hair in messy tangles, “finally awake?” And a soft chuckle on your lips as you speak, rubbing your eye, flinching as you rub your temples, “what exactly happened last night?”
“You mean besides you calling me pretty?” And your jaw drops, biting your lip, “and begging me to stay? Didn’t know you liked my company that much, Princess,”
You glare at him, “well with charm like that—“ you mutter, when it occurs to you, “why did you sleep on the floor? And with that?” You point to the polar bear plushie he used as a pillow last night.
Not his most preferred bedfellow.
Always full of surprises, his cheeks burn, and he only can hope it doesn’t show on his face, hidden behind a cheeky smile, “Didn’t know you were so eager to share a bed with me, sweetheart,” and you roll your eyes, “I have to warn you, I have a tendency to cuddle—“ and you smack him with a pillow, he sighs, “someone wasn’t too keen on sharing her pillows with me, so this was the best I could do,”
You snort, as you take the offending plushie from him, “Did you do something to him?”
He tilts his head, “Eh?” And you hold up the polar bear plush, “what could I do to him?”
“Someone did threaten to toss him out into the ocean so he could join his family,”
“I can do a lot of things, but I can’t solve global warming, Princess,” and you bite back a laugh, “I was on my best behavior with him last night, even though he’s a shitty pillow,” and you didn’t have to know how he had slapped him a couple times.
But even so, you bite your lip, looking down as you toy with your comforter, “why did you come?”
He blinks, “what do you mean?”
“You could have sent Suguru, but you came, and you stayed, on the floor,” and he curls his lips.
“Well what kind of fake boyfriend would I be?” And you roll your eyes, still waiting for an answer, and his voice grows soft, “you know why, Princess,”
“I do, but I don’t,” you murmur, fidgeting with your blanket as you chewed on your bottom lip, “my coworkers couldn’t stop talking about you last night, they kept saying how handsome you are, how wonderful, how perfect—“
“Should I be less handsome or perfect? Because don’t know if that’s possible—“ and it earns him another whack with the pillow, but he only catches it, “you say that like it’s a bad thing,”
“It’s not, but I don’t know why after all these years, you still want me,” you sigh, words pushing past your lips, “you could have anyone, Satoru,”
“If I just wanted anyone, I wouldn’t have fell in love with you,” and you bury your face in your pillow, gaze peeking down at him.
“You say that with such ease, how do you know what love even is? I don’t know if I know what it is,” you add, mumbling under your breath, and his eyes can’t help but follow the way your fingers run through your hair.
“I don’t think I need to know when I feel it,” Satoru sat up, dangerously close to you, within reach yet so far out of it, “do you need to know to see the sky is blue? Do you need to know to feel pain when you burn yourself?”
“Didn’t know you were taking philosophy classes with Suguru,” and he snorts, shaking his head, “Satoru—“
“Like I said before, Princess, just give me some time,” his fingers reach for you, and your breath catches, before he slowly smoothed your hair out, “and I’ll win you over,”
Your eyes flicker to his, and god, he wanted nothing more than to lean over and kiss you, but he couldn’t. He had to be patient. He couldn’t push you — he wanted you to want him just as much. He would make you fall into his arms willingly, and you’d kiss him — not the other way around.
“Want some breakfast?” your lips curl into a soft smile, the very same smile that he had fallen for time and time again.
“You offering to cook me breakfast?”
“Just wondering what would shut you up the quickest,” and he has half a mind to reply with ‘your lips,’ but he decides against it, “pancakes?”
~~~
“I can feel you staring,”
Even with your back turned to the stove, bowl in hand as you whipped the batter with the whisk, hoping your laser focus on the pancakes would help you distract yourself. But it did little when you could feel his gaze sticking in your back, spotlights on every little movement — something that wouldn’t have bothered you before — but after last night—
This was why you never drank.
You covered your face with the back of your hand, cheeks burning, as you placed the bowl down, what had your life become?
“C’mon you can’t just let a guy like that go,” one of the women from work nudged you — you couldn’t remember if her name was Kanae or Kanao — handing you a refill of the drink you had gotten, “he certainly seems into you from the way he looks at you,”
“If he isn’t, I’d take him off your hands,” Saki slurred, nearly spilling her drink, “he seems to like you. Is there really nothing between you two?”
“Not really,” you sipped your drink, if confessing to you after over a decade was nothing, “he’s just a friend,” and he was — a friend who was your fake boyfriend.
“You know with how you started, I thought your love life would be a lot more interesting,” Kanae sighed far too loudly, as she took another long swig of her cocktail.
“Well we’ve talked a lot about what you guys are but we haven’t asked how you feel,” Saki grinned, sloppily drunk yet somehow masterful with her questions, “how do you feel about him?”
And how did you? If someone asked you a few weeks ago, you would said he was just your little cousin’s best friend, a childhood friend — and you wouldn’t have thought twice. But now, he has given you so much to think about. Would you be this hesitant if you two haven’t met as kids? If he wasn’t Suguru’s best friend? If he didn’t seem so far out of your league?
Maybe. But you were never good at going for things you wanted — or accepting things as they were. Even with Naoya, you knew you should have broken up with him — you knew he was toxic, and yet you stayed — because it was easier.
And maybe it was easier to push Satoru away than to face how you felt.
Fuck, you were too drunk for this — you needed to get out of here, “excuse me,” you manage to slip away into the bathroom, washing your face, leaning over the sink.
You held your forehead, steadying yourself against the cold porcelain, fingers digging into the rim of the sink — eyes burning as your head throbs, a wave of nausea pulsing through your stomach. Fuck, there was no way that you could get home alone.
You pulled out your phone and scrolled — who the fuck would you call? The only people you knew were your family and…
Nope. No. Not an option.
You found Suguru’s number and tried to text, only to find your eyes blurring, and you knew if you sent a message he would be holding over any typos or fuck ups over your head forever.
You found his name, your head spinning as you clicked and called.
He didn’t pick up.
“Fucker,” you mumble, trying to hit his name again, your head spinning, and finally someone picked up—
And then you woke up in bed. A soft groan fell from your lips, knives prodding at every inch of your brain, memory blended and choppy as you drew into consciousness. You were home, your eyes fluttering open to sunlight illuminating your bedroom, a dull stiffness in your muscles that makes you stretch, turning on your side only to be met with a sight.
Satoru Gojo. Asleep on your floor, cuddling the plush polar bear he won for you. You stared, blinking, wondering if blinking away the sleep would somehow blink away Satoru too (it did not unfortunately). So you did the only other thing you could think of — take a picture.
As you glanced from the image to him, bits and pieces came back — from your drunken ramblings on the phone to the ones in person, your cheeks burning as you buried your face in your comforter before staring down at him. Was it possible to die of embarrassment? You were really testing those limits.
But even so, as you watched him sleep on top of the plushie, the only thing you could wonder was why had he stayed? He could have left after you fell asleep, or even before that, there wasn’t much you could have done to stop him. But he stayed, even on the floor, rather than anywhere else.
“So?” you didn’t need to turn from the stove to know he was grinning, “can’t I enjoy the show, Princess?”
“If you’re enjoying it so much, how about you become part of it and help?” you offer him a spatula, as he makes his way over, leaning over you, his body brushing against yours, but you ignore it all the same, eyes focused on the task instead on the warmth blooming from his touch, “I’ll spoon and you flip,”
The two of you work in silence, as you spoon batter onto the griddle and he flips the pancakes — and it’s only when you’re both just about done that you glance over, and his lips are curled, “What are you smiling about?” and he shakes his head, as he flips the last of the pancakes onto the stack, “Satoru—“
“I just never really have made breakfast like this before, or had someone make it for me,” he scratches the back of his head, “my parents always had chefs or maids or someone make me all my meals, and even when I moved out, I always cooked alone or bought my meals out,” he shrugs, as he turned the stove off, “it reminds me when you’d make me and Suguru instant ramen after we came in from playing outside,”
You snort, “You remember that?” You would get stuck making ramen for the two of them, tossing some seasoning and sauces into the mixture along with an egg, “I always put too much black pepper. I thought you hated it,”
“But I always finished,” he added, and he did, even if his cheeks were burning red and eyes watering by the end of the bowl. Your lips curl at the memory of him at the age of twelve downing an entire glass of water and spilling it all over the front of himself.
“Well I can make a lot more than instant noodles now,” you have Satoru set the table while you start to clean up, turning on the sink. You hear the clink of plates and utensils behind you, as he sets them down on the table, but you can feel his gaze fall over you even as your back is turned.
“I’m going to need some proof — there were a few times you almost burned those noodles,” and you pout, turning with your hands on your hips.
“Oh you want me to prove it now?” You turn, running your finger discreetly up the side of the used mixing bowl, finger full of batter as you walk up to him, hands behind your back.
“And how’re you gonna do that, Princess?” the corner of his lip quirks upwards, as you step close up to him, and god, he’s fucking tall — and it kind of pissed you off — all these boys shoot up like fucking weeds, but it didn’t mean you couldn’t knock him down a bit.
“Close your eyes, and find out,” he raises an eyebrow, suspicious, but still he obeys — good boy, the praise runs through your head to the tip of your tongue, but you bite it and the words back alike. And you’re so close, you can see his snow white eyelashes fan out against his cheeks, and he’s so unfairly pretty,
For now.
You’re so close, you nearly feel his body warmth radiate your skin — and you swear you hear his breath hitch — and it would be so easy to lean forward— “Princess — what—”
And then he gasps when you smear pancake batter down his cheek, a snort leaving your lips as he gapes at you, mouth ajar. He blinks, his hand reaching for his cheek, before he stops when his eyes flit to your batter caked finger, “You—”
You’re giggling, trying to stop yourself from doubling over at his expression, “What? I just wanted to give you a taste of my cooking before you tried it,” and he frowns at you for a moment, before his lips curl deviously, tilting his head.
“Is that right?” and his fingers run through the smeared batter, caking his finger tips before he’s stepping towards you, “then it’s fair, if I make you taste it too—“ and you’re trying to back up, giggles leaving your lips, but he catches you by the wrist.
“Satoru—“ you whine as you’re trying to squirm away, “let go!” but he only pulls you close, your body nearly bumping against his — and it was your turn for your breath to catch, cerulean irises stealing the air from your lungs as you drowned in them, “hey—“
“Just how much are you gonna tempt me, Princess?” and you should step away, but his fingers around your wrist send warmth blooming down your arm, straight to your chest, and you can’t bring yourself to step away.
“And how am I doing that?” His fingers tug you closer, thumb brushing against the inside of your wrist, before he leans close.
“You know exactly how,” and your glance flickers from his gaze to his lips, and back again, resisting the urge to shut your eyes — but you don’t have to, when he smears the batter all over your cheek.
“Toru!” You stare at him, and he’s laughing, as you grab at him, only for him to slip away, “I’m gonna kill you—“ and you move towards the sink, batter covered bowl still inside, “oh just you wait—“
But your beeline is cut short by his grip, arm darting around your middle, as he pulls you back. You gasp, struggling in his arms in vain — fuck his stupidly toned arms, “you shouldn’t start something you’re not ready to finish,” his words are said against your ear, but they rush down your body in almost a shudder.
His lips are an inch or two from yours, you would barely need to lean to reach them — the words of your coworkers ring in your ears
“Who said I wasn’t?” His eyes find yours, his fingers tilting your chin ever so slightly, when your phone rings.
You jerk slightly at the sound, your eyes flickering to the name across the screen and see Suguru’s name flashing on the screen.
“It’s Suguru,” and Satoru lets go of you, as you make your way to the phone, and you swear you hear him mutter something under his breath, “what did you say?” you don’t pick up the phone but a few texts come through anyway.
“Nothing,” he scratched the back of his head, “what did he say?”
“He’s asking if I wanna come over for dinner tonight, said you’re gonna be there too?” And you raise an eyebrow, as Satoru fishes his phone out of his pocket and glances at it.
“Apparently I am,” you turn on the faucet, cleaning your face off, offering Satoru a damp tissue. “Guess this won’t be the last meal we’re sharing today,”
“Guess not,” his fingers brush yours when taking the tissue, trying to clean the batter off his cheek but only spreads the mess. You snort, as you take the napkin from him holding his face by the chin, “so how’re we gonna play it?”
“Play what?” You toss the napkin away, both of you taking a seat at the table.
“Did you forget?” He stabs a pancake and places it in his plate, “we told your aunt we’re dating — and that we’re hiding it from Suguru, and you just agreed to dinner with both of them,”
Fuck.
✧ a/n: hi it's been quite a while T_T. sorry work has been so busy. i haven't had a moment to post, and now i had to split this up because it just got too long lmao. part two will come later, i'm going to be prioritizing my kinktober fics. thank you to @coffee-and-geto for betaing :)
✧ taglist: @satorusmochis , @celestialgojo , @sugurubabe , @being-me-is-not-a-sin , @strawberryfanatic01 , @cira273 , @sobbangchan , @hiraethwrote , @peppertoastuniverse , @dreamtardisspace , @redmangotango , @h4ru-h4ruu , @anpacax0 , @theshylittleelfgirl , @hyori2 , @elliesndg , @maddietries , @roses-can-be-deadly-too, @vernasce-blogs , @mrsoikawa17 , @spider-fan72 , @haoxiaoxi , @horchatacow , @lovemoreworrylessv, @maybe-a-bi-witch , @missroki , @rubyarerosies ,, @ranatherealestsigma , @svt-backup , @catsgomurp , @sakurastorm , @forest-fruits-jam , @lemonpoppy-seed , @goddess-ofthe-godless , @notgoodforlife , @johannakhalafalla , @fushitoru , @kentosbutterfly , @augustwinesworld
#sab [mlist]#satoru gojo x reader#gojo satoru x you#satoru gojo fanfiction#gojo fanfiction#gojo x you#satoru gojo smut#satoru gojo fics#satoru gojo x you#gojo x reader#jjk x reader#jjk fanfiction#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jujutsu kaisen x you#jjk x you#jjk smut#satoru gojo fluff
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my fellow gamers*... if you buy me a giftcard for the place i wanna get a fursuit head base from, i will match the giftcard value for a site of your choice myself and send you one back! steam, etsy, wherever! MUTUAL GIFTCARDATION
and i might (will certainly) even draw ya something too ;3
*when i say ''gamers'' it is a term of endearment; i am not Only referring to gamers really. gamer neutral term
(temp pinned, my about which is usually pinned is HERE)
#it is very unlikely that somebody would buy a 100 for me but PLEASE DON'T BUY THAT ONE WHAT I WANT IS MUCH LESS THAN THAT!!! THANK U LOL#been thinkin about this one for a long time#during christmas i wanted to gift my mutuals something but alas; you cannot really anon gift things ;^;#imagine if i asked you on anon ''yo give me your email it's somebody you know'' nobody would believe that!!#''dude i'm a fairy let me in dude don't you believe in fairies?'' type energy#pinned#because eh. why not.#offers
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hammered
you get a little too turnt during girls night, and logan comes to your rescue.
CW: heavily suggestive, profanity, Logan's your white knight, Ororo's gettin lit, men are creeps, you're actually drunk as a skunk, etc.
"You guys got together?! Why didn't you tell me?!" Ororo gasped, loudly, sitting up straight in her seat.
Your brows furrowed, eyes widening at her volume, a few passing party-goers sharing concerned looks.
"Say it louder. I don't think the rest of the city heard you..." you grumbled, face burning as you took a sip from your strawberry daiquiri.
She sat next to you on the little leather couch situated at the back of the club near the bar, which had began to trickle with activity.
The three of you had been there for only about thirty minutes, the buzz of the night starting to pick up, the dance floor packed with dancers and drinks flowing.
And the eyes, still staring.
"Ignore her, (n/n)," Jean smiled, kindly, as she rested a reassuring hand on your shoulder. "I think it's sweet you two took it at your own pace. It shows how serious you both are about this."
The three of you were having easy conversation, drinking and gabbing about whatever came to mind, when you and Logan were suddenly brought up.
And Ororo nearly died of shock when she found out you two were official.
"And speaking of seriousness... I believe we have an audience..."
Another group of three in particular, whose gazes were piercing you and your friends from across the way.
The three intense pairs of eyes belonged to three men in their best designer.
They each had their own outstanding feature: the tallest one sitting on the right had long, black hair, while the one on the left had arms roped in tattoos and lip piercings, the final one having a buzz cut and a snaggle-toothed smile.
Their lustful stares all but ignored by the two sitting next to you, your mind preoccupied with downing your second daiquiri that soon turned into a third.
You barely paid the men any mind, already knowing a man ten times hotter than all of them combined.
You actually missed him a whole damn lot.
You both were supposed to have a date night, but he got called last minute to round up Rogue and her friends who were causing havoc at some far off arcade.
So the girls dragged you out to the club, much to your protest.
'The kids just had to choose tonight of all nights...'
Ororo scoffed, gulping down another jell-O shot, "Waiting on him to come?" she chuckled, the flashing club lights making her light eyes sparkle.
You flushed in your mini dress, feeling hot despite the blasting AC and your exposed skin.
"You'll be waiting a while," she sighed, crossing her smooth legs over one another. "I heard Scott over the phone... those kids are in serious trouble."
You'd be lying if you said you weren't disappointed that he wasn't there, resting his hand at the small of your back, giving you those lustful stares on the dance floor, and complimenting your outfits in his own Logan way.
You'd done so much to make sure you looked hotter than hot, too.
You had raided your closet and pulled out a short, backless mini dress that made your legs look longer and showed off the curve of your spine sliding down towards your ass.
You loved, loved, loved it—how beautiful the black fabric looked against your skin; how sexy it made you feel.
Not to mention it was one of Logan's favorites.
He'd torn it off you many times.
Combined with your stiletto heels, fresh mani-pedi, the perfume adorning your wrists and the back of your knees, and hair that gracefully caressed your shoulders, you felt like a damn vixen.
Ororo sat up, taking your hand in hers, "No sense in sitting around while you wait, eh?"
She smirked at you, mischief in her eyes.
"Let's dance."
You paused a moment, hesitant.
But in that instant, those three daiquiris hit you like a truck, and all inhibitions went out the window.
'Fuck it.'
You stood up, chugging the last of your drink before taking her hand.
"Let's do it."
Famous last words.
Smoothly, you glided your fingers up your body, swaying your hips in rhythm with the beat as Ororo danced with one of the men.
You two had been dancing so well, you called the attention of the entire club. And with you about seven daiquiris in, it felt as if the music was coursing through your veins and melding with your bones.
The men of the establishment were hounding you both relentlessly—Jean having escaped to the bar to strike up some friendly conversation with the bartender—and even with your inebriated state, you fought them off vigorously, smacking away hands and returning advances with a sharp tongue.
Though the novelty was beginning to fade, and the urge to go home had began to set in.
As if on que, your phone began to buzz, taking your attention away from your thoughts.
"Hold up! I'm getting a call!" you laughed. "I'll be right back, 'Ro!"
She gave you a wink before you went stumbling off the dance floor, tugging a loose strand of hair behind your ear.
You decided to go to the nearest ladies' room, leaning against the wall where the long line started, before flipping open your phone.
You looked down at the caller ID, grinning to see the name of your favorite guy on the screen.
"Heyyyy, Logan," you sang into the phone with a drunk giggle.
"There you are," Logan let out a sigh of relief from the other side of the phone. "I've been tryin' to reach ya. I just finished roundin' up the kids and droppin' 'em off back home, so I'm free for the rest of the night if ya still wanna go out."
"Oh!" you chuckled, "Sorry!"
As you paused, Logan suddenly became confused.
"Where the hell are you? It's so loud, I can barely hear ya."
You placed one foot up on the wall, leaning your back flush against the cool tiles. "'Roro 'n' Jean took me to the club 'n' these guys tried to join us," you slurred. "Oh, they bought us drinks, too. And one said he liked my dress. He wasn't as good looking as you."
"You wearin' the backless one?" he asked, sounding intrigued.
You giggled giddily in response, finding humor in his quiet curse.
"Damn... ya had to pull that one out?"
"Oh, you should see me, Logan... I look gooood," you smiled, looking down at yourself. "But it's not the same... s'not as fun without you."
You lowered your foot back down to the ground and crossed your arm over your midsection, suddenly feeling cold and small.
"I miss you, Logan," you said, quietly. "Could you pick me up, please?"
His chest warmed at your tone, unable to fight the smirk on his face.
Despite the fact that you were absolutely sloshed, your mind still drifted to him, and even missed him when he was away.
It was adorable.
"Sure, sweetheart. Where are—?" "Wait!" you shrieked, a smile blooming on your face as you got quiet.
Logan cocked a brow.
'Huh?'
It was your favorite song.
"Logan! It's my song! I'll be right back!" you smile into the phone before hanging up, scrambling back to Ororo.
When you shimmeyed back onto the dance floor, she happily greeted you, moving in sync with the rhythm as you began your own moves.
"Oooo, what's that?" you asked, pointing at the glass she was holding.
It was orange and topped with ice and chopped oranges and strawberries, reminding you of a tequila sunrise.
"Want it?" she giggled, holding it out for you to take.
Which you gladly did, tossing it back lie it was water, humming approvingly at the taste as you licked the remnants off your lips.
The two men next to her were close to falling out from the scene.
"Fuck," one of them groaned. "Can you do that to me?"
You turned to them, brows furrowed. "Fuck off. My guy's gonna be here anyyyyy second."
Ororo gasped as she threw an arm around you, pulling you close to her perfume-soaked neck, "He's coming? That's great!"
You both cheered together, throwing your hands in the air as you continued to dance.
"C'mon," a man smirked from behind you. "What's he doing leaving a pretty lil' thing like you alone?"
Your face fell, expression annoyed as you turned to him, "Didn't I tell you to go somewhere? He's gonna show up sooon..."
The man had gotten closer, so close that you could see him lick his lips, expectantly.
He scoffed, leering down at you under the strobe lights, "But he ain't here, is he?"
"I wouldn't put money on it, bub," Logan replied from behind him.
Your eyes lit up like stars as soon as you laid eyes on your dark, handsome bodyguard.
He stood there behind the man with his thick, leather-clad arms crossed over his broad chest, which was covered by his white tee.
And he looked less than pleased.
"Logan!" you smiled, moving to stand by his side like a magnet.
The man turned to face him, watching as Logan snaked an arm around your waist, pulling you close.
"This is the boyfriend?" he laughed, amused.
His words hardened Logan's expression tenfold, and it took everything in you not to giggle.
"Yeah, I am. And why the fuck are you still here?"
His words forced the man's expression to meld into one of frustration, and you bit back an amused smile at the sight.
You were drunk out of your mind, but you knew better than to interfere.
The man swallowed thickly, "I was just—"
"Harrassin' my woman."
You felt your heart flutter at the nickname.
He'd been calling you that for a while, but somehow it always felt like the first time.
"I didn't know she was yours—"
In a flash, his Logan's fist was up, his claws were on display and right in front of the man's face, scaring the shit out of him.
"I don't like repeating myself," he spat, his tone leaving no room for argument. "Fuck. Off."
You both watched the man scatter, eyes wide as he scrambled toward the bar.
Damn.
'What a bitch...'
"You alright?" Logan asked, taking off his leather jacket as he glared around the room, taking notice of the other leering men on the dance floor. "This place is full of fuckin' sleazeballs."
You shrugged, running a hand through your hair, "Eh, I managed."
Wordless, he handed over his jacket, your nose wrinkled in confusion.
"What's that for?"
"You're shivering, (n/n)."
You looked down at yourself, realizing that you were, indeed, shivering.
"Oh."
"C'mon," he sighed, draping the jacket over your shoulders before resting his hand at the small of your back, steering you toward the exit. "I think that's enough fun for one night."
Glancing back at Ororo, he gave a small look, slightly concerned.
"Scott's on his way for you two... You gonna be good?"
"Tipsy, but okay!" she gave him a thumbs up, along with a little wink. "Have fun, you two!"
He ignored the innuendo, but nodded, going back to ushering you out the back door.
"I missed you, Logan," you confessed, a slight whine to your voice as you practically clung to him.
"I know you did, sweetheart," he sighed, approaching one of Cyclops' cars. "Let's get you home."
The moment you hung up the phone, he sped over to the club, breaking about fifteen different traffic laws in the process.
An annoyance he decided to deal with the next day.
Without warning, you grabbed him, shoving him up against a wall of the alley you were in, interlocking your fingers as your free hand traced mindless shapes in his chest.
"You look so good, Logan," you purred, eyeing him up and down with hungry eyes, heating him from the inside out. "So good."
Suddenly, your lips attached to his neck, lazily peppering the flesh with kisses and pecks, with the occasional nip.
"(n/n)... you're drunk," Logan stated, moreso for himself, as he weakly tried to pry you off.
"I'd do this anyway," you grinned into his skin, pulling back to look at him, gaze half-lidded. "You look so sexy..."
Slowly, your lips curled into a hazy, loving smile, your eyes staring up at him like he was the only thing in the world.
Fuck...
You'd think he was about to go into cardiac arrest.
'This woman's gonna be the death of me...'
"What's wrong?" you asked, lips pouty and eyes glassy as you looked up at him, your expression one of hurt. "You're not touching me..."
"Doll," he sighed, voice slightly strained. "As gorgeous as you look... and as much as I wanna pin you against this wall... you're fuckin' hammered. And I'd like to feel you up when you actually know what yer doin'."
He pulled back to see your reaction, only to find you were already out like a light, softly snoring and drooling all over his shirt.
A soft smile fell onto his lips at the adorable sight, the man brushing some of your hair out your face before scooping you up in his arms, pressing a long kiss on your forehead.
'Somethin' else...'
#james howlett#james howlett x reader#logan howlett#logan howlett x reader#mcu#mcu x reader#wolverine x reader#x men#x men x reader#wolverine
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‘GHOSTIN' ?! ★
ᡴꪫ sum. it's midnight and you're bored. bored and horny. everyone knows ghosts aren't real, or are they? you end up summoning a ghost and he's not leaving anytime soon, in fact, he wants to give you a taste of your own medicine for disrupting his slumber. you get a taste, alright.
wc. 5.0k
warnings. fem! reader, ghost! toji, unprotected, switch toji, praise, dirty talk, oral (m! receiving), manhandling, spit, impact play, brēeding, biting, size kink, mentions of tummy bulge, nipple play.
an. don't summon ghosts unless their name is toji fushiguro idk
don’t summon ghosts they said—you’ll regret it in the end they said,
but who cares? not you. besides, it’s not like ghosts even exist. you’ve never been one to believe in paranormal activity anyway, although all of that starts to change on a specific night. this night, the clock just struck twelve and you’re bored out of your skull. it was an ordinary sunday night and it was just you and your dead quiet apartment walls. as you’re scrolling on your phone, glancing at your feed a certain link catches your eye. wanna summon a ghost? click here to find out how.
to keep it brief, your curiosity eventually gets the best of you. with a snort, very much not believing the lengthy follow up article that warns you of the possible dangers to come of the spirit, you go into your bathroom, following the steps before your lights flicker. at first nothing happens, oh, see you knew ghosts weren’t real. annoyed a bit that you wasted fifteen minutes of your time—you prepare to leave the restroom when you feel a cold hand on creep on your shoulder.
“tch. the nerve,” a rough voice murmurs behind you. you tense up, craning your neck to indeed see the ghost that was displayed on the picture. yet, he looks more human-like if anything. toji, the name that was said to be his. toji eyes you up and down before a scoff leaves from his reddened slick lips. “why’d you summon me..”
you’re taken aback immediately. with a staggering height of almost six feet, you meet the soulless eyes of a mere attractive spirit. “i— uh,” you sheepishly peer down at your feet, not in a million years thinking it’d actually work. “you’re a real ghost?”
“uh obviously,” he murmurs, mocking your expense. trodding his bare feet across your carpet floor as if he knows the layout, he scratches his chest. “eh, what a mess. you live here?”
ouch, so he was hot and rude. figures,
you take a moment to gawk at the ghost’s attire. nothing really too appealing—just a simple white t-shirt with sweats. it almost could be mistaken as an eerie nightgown if you squint. again, he looks more human than an actual spirit. it was just the paleness of his skin that gave away his non-human features. his clothes weren’t the only thing you were staring at though.
his bulge,
its hard to not notice it, especially with a size like toji’s. you spot the invading print poke through his sweats, the roundness of it, basking in all its dirty glory. you had to restrain yourself from making a fool of yourself — licking your lips and almost allowing your lewd, obscene thoughts to take over. you couldn’t help it though, it was quite literally all in your face. you’re so entrapped in your little phantasm that you don’t even feel the ghost flicking his chilly cold fingers against your forehead.
“girl are you even listening?” he rasps.
“h-huh?” you look up, snapping out of whatever trance had you on such a leash.
toji deadpans, a groan sliding past his lips before he eyes you up and down. his gaze alone makes you nervous. “don’t huh me, i saw what you were looking at,” and he peels up his shirt with a single hand, exposing his curled up washboard abs. god, even as a ghost he was so ripped. your eyes ogle down towards the sable-black boxers he wore, the hem of it peeking from over his pants before he hums, amused. “wanna feel?”
“can i…?” your voice trails off, and it’s so pathetic and soft. you could hardly recognize your own softened tone but you didn’t care.
“knock y’erself out.” he hoarsely shrugs, and you barely give him a chance to finish before your fingers twang against his skin.
immediately, you feel how cold his body was, a shivering temperature that ghosts against your digits as you feel against his body. jade pupils of his burn into you as he watches intently. the hardness of his abs — you feel everywhere, the texture of it was rock hard. his muscles, the way he carried himself, the flexing of his abs. it was all just so attractive. despite how the lower half of his body was freezing, you continued to let your fingers wander on every part of his abdomen.
“you’re cute,” he murmurs, and you don’t realize he’s been staring at you the entire time. toji had to admit, for a human, you were quite easy on the eyes. maybe even his type, if he was a human himself. “are ya always this handsy towards people you first meet or…?”
“not really,” you huff, and your hand trails deeper until it stops near a certain area.
his happy trail,
it was so pretty, jumbles of blackened curly hairs run down near the under part of his v-line. he’s so perfectly sculptured. it was easy to compare his ghostly anatomy to a mere greek god. so perfect, the more your fingers explore down his muscular frame, the colder your fingertips get. “wow, are you sure you’re not a human?”
“wanna find out?”
his words struck right into you like a knife strikes its enemy — you pause, leering up at him with glossy eyes and a slight head tilt. in a coy tone, you rub the back of your neck. “y- yes.”
“c’mere then, girl.”
inching towards him, the ghost then pulls you into a longing kiss. its passionate at first then shifts to sloppy. you moan, feeling him try to pry open your lips with his tongue to allow him access. you do, savoring his freshly minty taste and even his tongue was just as cold. toji tasted like hypothermia—chillingly cold, yet your lips stuck against his like ice. speaking of, his lips stuck against yours like velcro, like glue. your breathing continues to grow heavier by the second before he snakes a hand around your neck, giving it a delicate squeeze. already, you were weak for his touch. toji’s thumb skids against the middle opening of your throat, physically feeling the vibrated sensations pour out from your sweet little esophagus.
a gasp wretches from your throat once you feel the front of his knee go right between your legs. it’s sneaky, the friction you feel from that muscle alone earns a soft noise from you. you whine in his mouth as tongues dance and tangle together in harmony.
where there’s harmony, there’s sync,
he loved the way your tongue curls into his mouth, tasting and savoring his minty flavor. you only wanted more by each dreadfully long second that passes. wobbly arms of yours sling around his neck and the static from his rubbing knee only grows. “f-fuck.” you’d whimper between hot, sultry kisses. suddenly, the air felt thick and heavy. you’re panting, lungs already feeling like they were about to collapse as he gingerly starts to suck on your neck. while he does, you succinctly open your eyes to see him already staring at you. darkened raven eyes, long untrimmed bangs that almost shield his eerie pupils alone, his eyes told a thousand stories.
his eyes told a thousand stories and maybe you wanted to know more about this ghoulish visitor.
after a while, the steamy kiss ends up departing and you gasp for air. “knees, pretty. get down for me.”
with how compliant you were, it was almost amusing to see. you get down on your knees, being face first with his bulge yet again. you just wanted to run your tongue everywhere. so full and well rounded, you already started to feel the saliva trickle into your mouth. mouthwatering. toji’s eyes rove towards the pullover hoodie you wore. with an impish expression, he claws a hand over your head delicately. a free finger of his crooks near your chosen attire.
“this. take it off, wanna see more of your body.” he utters in a low tone.
“for a ghost, you’re pretty pervy.” you tease, hauling the piece of clothing over your head.
“girl please. says the mortal staring at my crotch,” and as your hoodie is suddenly removed, he takes a good peek at your bra. he simpers. “mhm,” he inhales for a second, taking in your frame for a few solid moments. toji’s eyes then glance towards your chest. “bra, take that off too.”
you unclasp the back strap of your bra with one hand and he grunts once he sees your breasts spring free. “fuck, y’er pretty. ‘m gonna ‘hafta take my time with you.”
and he does,
toji’s got you on all fours, cutely struggling to take him fully into your mouth. his ruby-colored tip greets you and you can’t help but skitter your tongue against the frenulum. he groans, raking a hand in your scalp. as he’s standing, he moves a few strands of hair away from your face. “yeah, open that jaw. get it wet, spit on it if you have to, doll.”
“mmf,” a muffled moan comes from you as your knees dig into the ground. his taste was flavorless and still you wanted to savor it. sweet like candy, toji’s scent alone clogs up your nostrils and his darkened pubic hair tickle against the rim of your nose. he’s just so big though, so fucking big . .
as you’re taking him down inch by inch, it’s hard to try not to gag as he continues to gradually shove himself into your throat. toji’s abs clench and tighten as he sees your jaw hang open, giving you a single thrust and you pull away to gasp. already, you’re starting to drool for him. with your mouth left open ajar, it had easy access to the saliva dribble down the sides of your lips and onto your chin.
“heh, ‘s too big for you? that’s my bad.” he purrs.
“shut up,” you grumble, your tongue licking alongside his dick. a throbbing vein of his that runs down his side pulses against your tongue and you hear him hiss. toji’s still got a hand combing into your hair, pulling your head up concisely just so he can see that pretty face one more time. “so f-fuckin’ big.”
“this is just y’er mouth, wait ‘till ya feel me from the inside.”
you roll your eyes at his cockiness, preparing to take him inside of your mouth again. your spit covered lips open up and he coos once he sees that you’re slobbering. you let a few amounts of your sheeny saliva pour onto his shaft, wetting it in the process. “play with y’er tits, use ‘em.”
you grab ahold of your plump mounds, brushing a thumb against your perked nipples before your head starts to bob. as he’s sinking his dick into your tight little throat, he groans.
toji could get used to the warmth of your mouth, your plush lips suffocating all around him — he was addicted, and so were you.
with your head resuming to jolt up and down, bobbing repeatedly from the decent pace, your tongue continues to flick against his leaky tip, relishing in the bitterly sweet pre-cum that resides against the very top. another muffled moan slips past your lips as you’re still playing with your breasts, feeling them bounce against each other in crude tandem.
“such a pretty mouth… ugh,” he tightens his grip against your hair, thrusting his hips into you a bit. you break your hands away from your tits to latch onto his thighs. immensely, your fingers dig into the cottony fabric of his sweatpants. toji starts to pant laboriously. heave after heave, you’ve got him sweating already. peeping down, his dick twitches at the sight of your spit dribbling down the corners of your pretty purses lips.
as it travels — it cascades like a waterfall, landing between the curvature of your chest. “mhm, jus’ like that. good girl. haah, ‘s good.”
as his hands rummage in your hair, it’s still maintaining its strengthening grip—you inhale through your nose as your head bounces in consistency. his fingers were still crispy cold, you’re feeling frosty all the way from the waist down.
not only were you feeling frosty though, you were throbbing..
it was no mistake. the sudden adds of multiplying throbs that pang against your pussy makes you start to whine as a hand of yours reaches between your thighs. your panties protect your slick arousal and a pout contorts against your lips as you’re still having your mouth stuffed full of ghostly cock.
“f-fuuuck, y’er fuckin’ nasty. play with y’erself while ya suck me off, do it.” he groans, it was as if he read right through your mind. toji’s breathing starts to pick up as he’s keeping strict eye contact with you. doe-eyed and all, your lashes suddenly shut close for a few seconds. toji meanly pistons his hips, and you moan as you drag your fingers against your sheathed pussy. peeling your laced panties to the side—you strum two digits against your slick entrance, starting to rut back and forth. toji snickers, ruffling the top of your head. “gonna fill this throat up with so much cum, you want that, sweets?”
abruptly, you pry your mouth away from his fattened dick before breathing in a gasp of fresh air. slyly, you hum, a hand wrapping around his hefty base. “don’t you mean with ectoplasm?”
“y’er mouth’s getting smart,” he sneers, grabbing ahold of your head before making you go back down.
toji started to get addicted to your frisky tongue. the way it’s so sloppy, slurping up every part of his fervor, he only wanted more.
he’s a ghost and well, it’s been a while..
as his dick perfectly tucks inside of your mouth, you take him even further. a clammy hand of yours starts to fondle with his balls and he groans. with his jaw tightening, he starts to feel his thigh pounce. “fuuuuck me,” he heaves lowly, knowing his finish was about to approach rather sooner than later. he was just so thick in your throat, tap-tapping away at your little uvula. toji stares at your pretty slobbering lips, your hands still crammed all up inside of your cunt before he presents a more thorough thrust into your mouth.
a familiar primal heat pools into the very depths of your tummy before you hear toji suck his teeth.
it’s a long, deep and sexy groan.
it bellows throughout the thin walls of your small apartment — his face turns sour and you start to feel a surprised guest get introduced on your tongue.
his cum tastes more sweet which was peculiar. usually it’s tastelessly bitter, bland and purely insipid.
but with him, it was sugary sweet. as he pours such volumes of satiny ropes into your mouth, your hands continue to cling onto his pants. it’s a lot, with the way the ghost’s cock erupts into your mouth it’s like a volcano. spitting out such gooey sums of seed. its warmth has you wanting more, as it fills the very inside of your mouth, your tongue swirls all around the savory uncanny mixture.
toji yokes your head back, taking his heavyset dick out of your mouth and you gawk at how red it was now. from the very top, a smile stretches against your lips knowing you did that. swollen, fat balls of his were all in your face, neglected and just desperate to be played with a bit more.
“shit,” he sighs, taking a moment to breathe. toji looks down at your dumb expression, more smug than anything. a hand of his cups underneath your chin before he bends down, pulling you into a deep kiss. again, you return the favor, glissading your tongue against his. it tickles and tangos together, enjoying each other’s wet company. he grunts, reveling in the sweetened taste of his own cum that’s just residing inside your mouth. no shame, no shame at all. the kiss was much sloppier this time—toji pulls away to lick near the corner of your lips, capturing a few remnants of his own seed that tries to stream down from your mouth and below toward your chin. breaking away, he grabs your neck softly, giving you an intimating stare. “you,” the ghost murmurs, his eyes flickering towards your bed. “i wanna break you.”
“you’ll have to pay for that you kn-”
“don’t make me drag you, human.”
you let off a soft playful ‘oof’ once you’re faintly tossed on your own bed. his strength was out of this world— quite literally though,
you look at toji and he inches himself closer towards you. as he leans in for another warm kiss, his body presses up against yours. he starts to grind against you, the friction leaves a wave of fuzz in your ears that never seems to go away. cold glacial lips squashing against your own as you flick your tongue against his, moaning for more. as he’s claiming your mouth in such a rough way, you start to paw at his pants. you feel a simper tug against his lips as he makes out with you, feeling the weight of the bed collapse and shriek a bit in ponderous discomfort.
“taste so good,” he grouses, withdrawing his lips to nip chaste kisses near your neck. you moan, feeling him prop between your thighs. he then licks all against the hidden crevices of your collarbone. “ever fucked a ghost before?”
“usually i’m more into humans,” you pant, and he gives you a subtle eye roll. if you knew a ghost such as toji would look this good — perhaps you’d summon him a long time ago on that stupid link.
“really, oh,” he plays along, prying your legs open a bit to take a quick peek at what he was about to destroy. with low hooded eyes, toji grunts as he sees your soaked pussy all open and on display for him. a padded thumb of his runs down your puffy slit and your legs twitch slightly as a greeting response. “mhm, such a pretty cunt. tell me though,” he huffs, enveloping all five digits around his cock to give it two single pumps. he prods his leaky cockhead against your entrance, watching you writhe underneath him. “before you summoned me, were ya playin’ with her?”
her as in between your legs, your pussy,
for some reason, toji addressing your cunt as her made you throb profusely. you felt it. an annoying ring screams through your ears as you slump back against your bed, your ankles making an attempt to lock around him. “n- no.”
“y- yea,” he mimicks your little stutter. your mouth drops as you feel yourself starting to gape open for him the moment he starts delve his dick into your pussy. he was so big, you feel the curve of the head and it’s just voluntarily crooking inside of you. toji gives you a side eye with misty peripherals, watching as you make an attempt to hide your face within the crack of your elbow. “nah, girl. don’t hide that pretty face from me. i wanna see you while i stretch you out.”
you moan, feeling his frigid fingers peel your arm away and he’s got a full face view of you.
already, your toes started to center with feelings of pure numbness. his thick cock splits inside of you so good that it’s already got you whimpering out elongated syllables. your voice was a euphony, “oh my g-goddd,” you whimper out, grabbing ahold of his shoulders. toji falls into your chest, still easing his way into your accepting walls. it’s relatively hot inside, smoldering gummy walls of yours entrap him, holding him hostage. he sibilates out a single hiss as you’re still trying to adjust to his massive size. his sack hangs from the base down and you let off a lusty giggle, already cockdrunk. “s-so the rumor’s true that ghosts have big dicks, f-fuck you’re gonna split me open.”
“heh, oh? that’s a fact, not a rumor,” he playfully flicks your forehead. a hand of his then clasps around your thigh. he spreads it apart, sinking into you further. he’s so deep, halfway in that your stomach’s already seizing. it was his tip that made you feel everything at once. the girth he has, he makes sure you feel every inch, every part. toji’s filling every area of your orifice with his spectral shaft. “ugh, clampin’ around me so good,” and he presses a palm against your tummy. “feel me here, yeah?”
and you do, as his hand gingerly brushes against the outer skirts of your stomach, your lips part into an ‘o’ shape of surprise. “y- yesss, fuck. ‘s deep, toji.”
“fuck,” he groans, and you let off a cute astounded, ‘oh’ once you feel him fully plug you all the way in. it’s a popping noise that you’ll never forget. heavy balls of his creates a single thrust and you jolt all the way back. clawing at the backsides of his skin, you whimper out a sweet melodic hum. “pussy’s gonna get me addicted, girl.”
your legs lock and ensnare around toji’s slim waist as he starts up a pace—he’s slow and steady at first. slow and steady wins the race, but with a dick as big as his, you’re already losing. not so much physically, at least not yet.
just a few fathomless thrusts from the ghost and you were whipped, starving for more. hungry even.
perhaps if this was some sort of dream, you didn’t wanna wake up. it all felt to real to just be your imagination anyway,
his hits against you were just so good that it was brutal. toji’s got you laid against your back so he can stare right into your eyes. he’s panting, gawking openly as he feels you bare down on him. your dense walls squeeze around him before he’s starting up a more salacious tempo. you could barely even keep up. you whine, craning your neck to the left a bit — to the right, then to the left for the umpteenth time. your legs were already shuddering, your cunt feels so stuffed of his shaft that you’re already flumped against the mattress. not even before long, it’s stares to bounce and judder from the clumps of weight on top of it. you dig your teeth into toji’s shoulder, whimpering at how he repeatedly thwacks his tip against that forbidden g-spot. “t- toji, tojiiii,” you hiccup, cross eyed and doe-eyed.
he could listen to your voice all day, a tune he could forever hum.
for the nth time within seven seconds, your pussy squelches from the parching sensations of pleasure. you’re so wet, sopping so much that you put faucets to shame. toji feels your slick trying to snail its way all the way down to his base. “that’s it, mhm. fuck against me, girl. c’mon, yeah,” he shushes up against your ear, licking against your lobe. you shiver, his voice all deep with a slight hint of rasp in it. a raw moan grabs itself from the back of your throat and you feel a hand of his snakes its way towards your jouncing tits. toji groans—leaning in to suck against your neglected nipples, feverish breath ghosting against your sweet skin before you whine. “god, you taste so mmf, good.”
as he’s still jerking his sharp hips into you at full might, his tongue swirls around your pretty nubs, savoring it. another ear splitting ‘pop’ leaves his lips each time he breaks away from your mounds. “could eat you up.”
“f- fuck, ‘s good, toji. harder p-pleaseee,” you mewl out, his weight that hovers over you sends you shivers all throughout your spine and body. strained deep inhales escape from your heavy lungs as you feel his calloused fingertips dance against your skin. a big hand of toji’s caresses alongside the curvilinear juncture of your body, your pretty physique—taking in your humanly beauty. oh, a sight for sore eyes.
toji was almost positive he was addicted to you, he’s fucking you so deep that he makes it so easy for you to jerk away from from your attentions. he even has a scent to him. despite his phantom being, his aurora alone was just enticing. its strong. the musk infiltrates the insides of your flared up nostrils and you whine again. your whine was more of a choke, clinging onto his back, scraping your nails down his tense back muscles.
“f-fuck, squeezin’ around me so good, baby,” he groans, leafy eyes staring into yours the entire time. toji leans in to nip kisses everywhere on your face, near your neck, and right back to your chest again. your body, he could get used to this,
to you.
maybe humans weren’t all that bad,
toji’s hips were rude, the perfect way to describe it. it really knew no bounds, he knew no bounds.
your glossy eyes glance up at him and he’s got nothing but a sly smirk plastered on his face. you study his features as he’s plowing you deeply into your own bed—the bed creeks and creeks that it sounds like it’s hanging onto his final hinges.
as you’re gazing into his features, the first thing you notice was that scar.
he’s got a slanting, slashing scar that runs down near the right side of his mouth. surprisingly, it makes him ten times more attractive than he already was. as you’re trapped in your own thoughts again, he moves his face closer to you to kiss an alluring slope down the side of your neck. just a few minutes with you and he was already memorizing each particular spot of yours.
an adorable lewd expression marinated against your features as your pussy continues to slosh and squeak against his thickened cock. he’s so big inside of you, your tummy ends up extending a bit from his angles he’s hitting. toji never misses a spot though, he’s a precise man, a precise ghost,
you’re left stupid with your tongue visibly lolling out. he can’t help but chuckle.
“look at that tongue, mhm,” and he takes the opportunity to suck against the limp muscle. you whine, hugging his beefy body tightly as you suddenly feel agitated with the pure feeling of your arousal. pretty soon, you were getting close.
he was too—he could feel it, warm bodies against each other, he was gonna lose it.
toji’s mouth goes against your neck, exposing his pearly whites and he bares a single fang. he buries it into the crook of your neck again, adam’s apple bobbing out from each guttural moan that detaches from him.
“f-fuck fuck,” you sob out, your ankles securely locking around his hips as he’s making more haste. you let off a tiny whine, his teeth gently nibbling against your flavorsome flesh. you tasted so sweet, he craved you. crimson lips of his twitch before he pulls you into another kiss. this time, it’s more passionate. as his tongue explores the very depths of your mouth, his tempo was now relentless. flimsy arms of yours continue to flop due to your weak grip against his wide shoulders before he gently bites your bottom lip. “inside,” you huff, licking the edge of his scar. a faint purr comes from toji once you do that and it’s a bit cute. “wanna feel you from the inside.”
“careful,” he groans into your neck, pressing a palm onto your tummy again. “you might get possessed after this.”
you pause, giving him a furrowed eyebrow look and he only sneers at you.
“joking, ghost cum ‘s harmless, baby. i think..”
he was nothing but a mere tease, you roll your eyes before you babble over and over in his ear for him to shoot inside of you. with ease, he’s emitting out all kinds of moans from you. you’re so loud, he’s got sensitive ears so it makes his ears twitch. your voice though, he’s so drawn in to hearing every little whine that departures from the backs of your precious throat.
welts of pleasure surge through your body as your chest recoils against his. gnawing down on your lip, you spasm once it finally approaches.
it’s a wave, pouring into you all at once. the crash was unexpected. expect the unexpected, they say.
your legs felt zealously numb, your eyes dramatically roll back as your high finally comes. it’s so much, you could still feel your cunt gaping. a whiney grunt cuts out of your throat before a squeal shortly follows. waves and waves of pleasure make way for you, pupils twinkling with stars, you were experiencing pure ecstasy.
shortly afterward, toji’s comes and when he cums, it’s a lot. he spurts into you in volumes, it dumps into you so good that you’re left twitching. suddenly, you grow quiet from the way his palm swats over your mouth. “listen to it with me. saved so much for you.”
and his words were slow, his breaths were slow, everything was ploddingly slow.
you don’t think you’ve ever felt more full in your life, your cunt constricts one more time around his length before you let off a dry whimper. “mmm,” you inhale a candied breath, he’s still buried balls deep. his hilt thrashes against your sodden entrance gently before he pulls out, staring at the mess. such goopy amounts of cum pour out of your slit, he brings two fingers to peel back against your sloppy folds. you’re covering him with your slick, viridescent eyes of his peer down to see the head of his cock still oozing out with gluey white masses of seed. “toji..”
“atta girl,” he whispers, hearing the little falter in your voice.
so cute,
he’s filled you up to the brim and that was only just the beginning. “i know. i kn—” and he pauses, being cut off as he feels you bedaub his sensitive tip against your greedy cunt. you move it against your opening slit, watching as it tries to swallow it hole before you pull it back outs you’re still oozing and his eyes flicker to white for a second. “fuuuck, ‘m still sensitive girl.” and he’s the one to let off a whine this time. toji’s weight still hangs against you before you drag him into a kiss while hearing his deprived whimpers feed into your mouth. jet black strands of his tickle against your forehead as he grinds his hips against you, already weak for you. the epitome of pussy drunk. whatever spell you had, he wanted to know what it was. perhaps your pussy was a curse he wasn’t aware of.
your taste was just too tasteful. with the way you linger on his tongue like a treat, he only wanted more. toji pulls away after a while, shaft still halfway into you—idle, not moving a single inch. he’s buried but remains still. a shimmery concoction of spit leaves each lips and toji pants as your lips stray away from his. toji’s lungs feel like they were on fire, each breath he takes feels like it’s being snatched away.
“you,” he exhales, a thumb curling underneath your chin. with a needy look, the ghost’s confidence throws itself out the window and his bottom lip quavers a bit. he pants, making you switch positions and he pats his lap, pouting. “you, on top of me. i- i want more of you. please.”
#★vegasbaby.#toji smut#toji x reader#toji fushiguro smut#toji fushiguro x reader#toji x reader smut#toji x you#toji x y/n#fushiguro toji x reader#jjk smut#jjk x reader#jjk x you#jjk x reader smut#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jujutsu kaisen x you#jujustsu kaisen x reader#anime smut#female reader#jjk fic#jjk imagines#cw sex mention
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