#but damn if this isn’t the most romantic thing he could have said

[seal7035]

"We are at the core of the world."

[lottiies]

SHARED MY BODY AND MY MIND WITH YOU

→ Leon broke up with you because of his emotional baggage, not wanting to drag you down into his trauma-induced misery. He didn’t usually date out of his line of work anyway, he hated himself for involving himself with someone so innocent. But when he gets a voicemail at an awfully late hour and listens to it, he nearly broke driving laws to get to your place. He still loves you, that much is certain. Your body and mind are like a second nature to him

CW: MDNI, fem!reader, pwp, one sided breakup, angst, description of leon’s self guilt and sabotage, heavy mentions of marriage, centered around Leon rather than the reader, reconciliation, lovemaking–gentle sex, crying, very small religious snippet, he eats you out, unprotected p in v, implied aftercare + implication of a better future

WC: 5.3k

Note: i think…this is my favorite fic that i’ve ever written. breaking my pink blog theme with this and actually capitalizing letters um…i had to set the tone okay. i actually started working on this in january to cope with some things, but i didn’t make much progress until recently!! the title’s a lyric from the song ‘cruel world’

BOT VERSION HERE MASTERLIST

Leon has a rule: never get emotionally involved with anyone who isn’t in his line of work. The reason behind that is self-explanatory. It's too difficult to accomplish. All his baggage holds him down, and he’s always away for long periods at a time and then returns back with body aches all over and has to hibernate for a while. What does he truly have to offer?

He did it anyway.

You managed to romance him, granting him a fleeting glimpse of happiness and a chance at self-love. Lingering caresses, meaningful eye contact, soulful conversations, an audience to his jokes, the key to your heart — you gave him everything.

Breaking up with you was painful, the second it was all said and done and you were out of his sight, he broke down crying. That was what he deserved, that’s what his mind told him.

It was easy for Leon to disappear from your life, just as quick as the snap of his fingers. He was never around that much to begin with. Your efforts in reaching out to him were futile if he was halfway across the world dealing with another abrupt assignment, or if he fell back into the habit of nursing a drink in some run down bar without contacting a soul.

But no amount of alcohol could make him forget about you these days. The memories of you were too strong to be diluted.

“What about this one?” Curiosity had dripped from your question, your fingers gently feathered across the healed up scar on his left shoulder.

Leon was almost an open book when it came to you, he truly cherished honesty in any relationship, whether romantic or platonic. Guilt weighed on him for having to limit certain answers to only the surface details. It felt wrong; it felt like he was keeping secrets from you and keeping you in the dark. But it couldn’t be helped, not when you weren’t in the same line of work as him. Most of the contents of his work were confidential.

After all, at this point the two of you had only been dating for half a year. How could he burden your mind with the harsh realities of everything that wasn’t known by the general public?

The two of you were naked, tangled under the sheets. No sex or anything, simply getting familiar with each other’s bodies and exploring with gentle and cautious hands.

“1998, shot on duty.”

The memories were still fresh in his mind. People say that forgetting a traumatic event is common, people dissociate to cope and shield their brain. It was the opposite for Leon. All the screams plagued his mind like a damn mantra, no way in hell would he ever be able to forget anyone’s voice.

Either that, or his mind made up fantasies about what could’ve been between you both. Domestic bliss. Buying a house together. Shy talks about how many kids you guys wanted. The memories haunted him. He wanted it back.

He even bought a ring. A beautiful one that he was meant to display to you when he sunk onto one knee and popped the question that would hopefully bind the two of you for life. The one that he was supposed to fidget with whenever he held your hand as the two of you planned your wedding, whether it be simple, grand, or to elope.

He kept it safe even after he broke up with you, he couldn’t bear to throw it away because of the sliver of hope that maybe one day he’d still get the chance of putting it on your finger. He felt like a fool. Sometimes he opened the box up to reminisce. It tugged at his heartstrings when he saw how rough his own fingers were in comparison to the smooth metal, from his years of physical exhaustion and training. God, he wished your hands would never get all battered like his.

He thought about you so much that you were the star actress in his nightly dreams.

The worst ones were the nightmares, though. Like the one that had him turning in his sleep tonight.

It all replayed in his mind. Your facial expression when he broke up with you out of the blue — the way the smile on your face had faded into a frown, your glimmering eyes contorting into that of disheartened ones. The way you looked at him with such a concoction of emotions. The pitiful chuckle that escaped your lips along with a nervously spoken ‘what?’ Or maybe it was the prolonged silence afterwards that killed him. It felt like hours until he got a proper response from you, one that was drowned out by the drumming of his own heart and the pulse that formed in his ears.

Usually he got to the end of it, but tonight he was abruptly woken up by the sound of his phone ringing. A blessing in disguise, maybe. Regardless, he was a bit irritated, he had always been such a light sleeper.

“You’re kidding…” Leon let out a heavy sigh, trying to rub the sleep away from his eyes. He didn’t even want to answer, too tired to even think about the possibility of being called to the field. No way in hell did he want to be met with Hunnigan’s voice and some intel he didn’t feel like remembering.

He let the phone ring, and eventually, blissful silence filled the room again. If it was dire, he knew he’d get another call soon.

Instead, he heard his phone vibrate not long after. He muttered out a curse before reaching for his phone, seeing that a voicemail was left. He didn’t bother reading whose number it was. Christ, the message was 5:06 minutes long.

Whatever. He played it aloud, resting his forearm over his face as he listened in.

“Hey Leon, it’s me…”

Fuck.

He fully sat up on his bed, so quickly it could’ve given him whiplash.

“I miss you. Still think about you every day. I don’t know what I did wrong…you probably aren’t even listening to this. I just…I don’t know.” a sigh. “The clock hit 12 and um, well today’s the anniversary of the day you asked me out. Maybe you don’t remember. I think you do though, you were always good with dates.”

Leon knew the voice of a broken person when he heard it.

No. It wasn’t supposed to be like this. He was supposed to let you go and then you’d see how much life had to offer, how any other person could give you a better and more stable relationship.

How could you be hung up on a man like him?

It was instinctual. He shuffled out of bed, body reacting before his mind and reaching for a clean pair of clothes from his closet. He left the voicemail playing in the background, it filled his lonely house. His heart was racing so loudly he couldn’t even hear the sounds of the wind outside or the creak of the floor with every step. All he did was change and brush his teeth before he drove over to you.

Thankfully, the roads were empty and the highway was free of traffic or else surely he would’ve been pulled over.

Thinking rationally wasn’t necessary when it came to you, not when he just got punched in the gut with a load of nostalgia and gut wrenching heartbreak.

He has always been yours, even during the separation. His heart hammered within his ribcage when he pulled into your driveway, his body moving in a hurry out of his car and towards your door. No hesitation.

Knock, knock, knock.

Ten seconds felt like ten minutes, but eventually the door swung open.

Your pretty face filled the focus of his pupils, his expression softening. You looked like a deer in the headlights, gazing up at him with wide eyes.

Oh, my sweet girl. There she is.

His hands itched to reach for you, to hold you in his arms and spin you around, nuzzling his nose against yours like old times — like some romantic drama. He hadn’t watched one in a while, they reminded him too much of you. He shoved his hands in his pockets.

Leon's hair was messy. It was a sight you had seen many times: his bed hair. Those emotion carrying eyes of his were contrasted with the lifeless bags under them. He came over so damn quickly he hadn’t even taken the time to make himself look composed.

“Leon? What are you…” You couldn’t even finish your thoughts. You felt nothing yet so much at the same time, perhaps from the shock of it all. You brought two fingers to the pulse on your neck to make sure you were awake, and hadn’t somehow fallen asleep after your call and voicemail to him. The thundering pace of your pulse confirmed that you weren’t off in dream land.

“I got your voicemail,” He responded, sounding remorseful. “Had to make sure you were alright. Uh…can I come in?”

You continued staring at him like if he was some sort of supernatural being. If you reached your hand out to touch him, would he disappear? Or perhaps your limb would go straight through him as if he was transparent.

You snapped out of it and nodded. “Yeah, come on in.” Hesitation clouded your tone, not out of wariness but because you had no clue what the hell was going on. You hadn’t seen him in over a year, at least not in person, only through photos and videos you still had saved on your phone from when the two of you were dating (going through them was part of your nightly routine.)

“To be honest…I wasn’t expecting you to even hear my message.”

You stood there awkwardly as he entered, closing the door afterwards. Your apartment still smelled the same, a wave of comfort washed over him despite the circumstances, his eyes darting around at all your belongings. This was once his safe space, like his secret haven.

You sat on your couch, waving him over. Your legs felt like jelly, no way could you be standing for this. He followed, sitting on the couch cushion on the opposite side from you.

“My ringtone woke me up. I thought you were a coworker of mine at first but…I’m glad you weren’t.”

“Glad, really?”

“Yeah.” He gave no further context, at least for that minute.

Silence hung in the air, time became still. Either way, the shared glance between the two of you broke the tension, you were both thinking the same thing. Your minds were linked, seeking reconciliation, every circuit of neurons buzzing with your shared proximity.

He rested his elbows on his knees, running a hand through his hair, a nervous habit. Everything felt surreal, you couldn’t take your eyes off him, afraid he’d disappear.

“I’m…I’m sorry about the way I ended things.” There was a crack in his voice, he was so desperately clinging onto the ideology that he shouldn’t wear all his heart on his sleeve. He failed every time though, his words had wavered.

“I know.” You truly did.

“How?”

“Because I know you, Leon. It hurt, and I found myself wondering why you would just up and leave after what felt like such a meaningful time. But I didn't ever think you did it with mal intent.”

You should be demanding answers, hell, he could even take a few slaps to the face. Maybe his guilt ridden self preferred that to your sweet treatment. Did he even deserve to be met with your understanding? This self-pitying mindset he harbored is what had led to this in the first place.

“You’re right. I didn’t mean to hurt you, that’s the last thing I wanted to do.” Were his efforts in explaining himself getting across? “I thought it was better this way. I'm…broken.”

Trying to convince him that he isn’t ‘broken’ was futile, all you could do was beautify it instead. You scooted closer to him, clasping one of his hands between yours. “All you see are your faults, but I was seeing you entirely, not just for what you do in your job or the images that keep you up at night.”

His hands felt the same. Calloused in areas he couldn’t help like his knuckles and his palms, but well-kept in the nail department. He looked down at the physical contact, putting his other hand atop yours, his thumb grazing tenderly at your skin. Familiar territory.

“It’s hard not to.” He admitted, his eyes feeling glossy all of a sudden. “My job is my life, it drags into every other part of my life.”

“How did it drag into our relationship?”

He truly didn’t know how to answer that. The times he shared with you were the best experiences of his life. He finally got the chance to pull out his cardboard box full of romantic movies to watch with the lover he had been waiting for his whole life, you. Countless nights spent cooking together in your kitchen, full of laughter and playful bickering, and some harmless food fights. Grocery shopping together with laced fingers, just a sneak peek into domesticity. God, he yearned for its return.

“I don’t know. I constantly had to leave and got no vacation time either. Let’s see…I had to keep a lot of information confidential. It kinda screams ‘this’ll all make a girl run the other way.’”

How wrong he was, he ended up leaving before he could get abandoned, as if that would’ve happened, though, you never wanted him out of your life.

“That wasn’t true for me, Leon. I wanted to be with you. I just hope I wasn’t a burden on you.”

That hurt. A dull ache spread across his chest. He pulled you close, tucking you against his side.

“Don’t say that,” His instruction was soft spoken, his lips brushed against your cheek. You were never a burden, he always shut you out, thinking that his heart was full of thorns and you’d prick yourself if he let you get too close. That, perhaps his sorrow was contagious and his poison would flood your veins.

Words of comfort weren’t his strong suit, but he tried his best. He had to. “You weren’t a burden. Never were, and never will be, okay?”

It felt so good to have you against him, his gaze was set on you, searching for any indicator that you were uncomfortable. You leaned your shoulder against his shoulder though, nuzzling against him. Pensive silence followed.

Even with the somber undertones filling your apartment, your heart was bursting. He was here, back with you. Holding you like he used to do after you had a particularly stressful day at work, or when you had an argument with one of your close ones.

The long separation made familiar carnal desires spark to life, along with the itch to bring them to fruition.

“I’m glad you’re here.” You murmured to him, but your wavering voice caught his instant attention.

You were on the verge of tears, oh dear. If you started sobbing, he wasn’t sure if he’d be able to hold back from crying either.

Leon didn’t waste a second, pulling you onto his lap, one of his hands stroking the back of your head, his other arm wrapping around your back.

“What are you thinking about?” He needed to know. You had always been the most verbal, whereas his feelings usually showed on his face or body language.

“About how much I missed you.” You respond, running your hands up and down his arms, squeezing at his muscles. “And how unreal this feels. And…” Your eyes flicker down to his lips. “I wanna kiss you, Leon…and y’know.” Make love. “Like old times.”

Oh.

“Are you sure?” Leon hadn’t intended for the night to play out this way. He needed to make sure you were actually thinking straight with the pool of emotions you seemed to be drowning in. To be fair, he was drowning too.

It was midnight, your bodies burned for one another.

“I am.” You uttered those words with such finality, eyes set on him.

This wasn’t some impromptu longing for his physical connection, you had been craving it for as long as the two of you had been separated. To feel him in the purest and most tender way possible, nestled against one another and eliciting feelings no one else could.

The pads of his thumbs rub circles against the fat of your hips. He's looking up at you, his eyes are unable to hide a flicker of yearning and affection. Expressive, his pupils dilated and his eyebrows slightly raised. He blinked slowly, like a cat showing utmost trust to its owner.

He looks at you like he worships you (he does.) Get him on his hands and knees, he’ll mumble your name like you’re his god and he’s praying to you, all his sins out in the open and his scarred body for you to look over and judge. He’ll be vulnerable with you if that means you’ll forgive his wrongdoings and give him a second chance. You must be a merciful god, no doubt about it.

“Don’t look at me like that.” You murmured, cupping his face. His gaze was hypnotic, sending a wave of security down your body. It almost felt as if you traveled to the time before he shattered your heart into pieces of glass.

“Like what?” He couldn’t help it. Not like he had a mirror, anyway. His face was usually tense, brows permanently furrowed and eyes narrowed from being attentive all the fucking time, his lips a straight line, jaw anything but relaxed.

Not right now, though. Never with you. Everything in his body softened and loosened up around you. Well, with the exception of his dick but that was another matter.

“You know what I mean. Like…like you still love me.”

Leon didn’t know what to say. The words died in his throat while every fiber of his being wanted to say ‘I do.’ The same words he could’ve voiced out standing across the altar from you. His brain short-circuited.

His pause came across as ambiguous to you, to mask the pain, you kissed him. Like a chocolate on a hot summer day, he melted in an instant, turning to mush, holding one side of your jaw and matching your pace.

The two of you mingled like two puzzle pieces. Your chest was flush against his, one of your hands finding his hair and pulling on it, earning a drawn out groan from him. It went slow for the first five minutes, some occasional pull backs for breath, shy smiles in betweens, before going back in like the act of kissing was needed for your pulses to continue, your hearts beating as one.

“Mmph.” Your whimper made him shudder, oh how he had missed that noise. His other hand got a bit more confident, resting on the small of your back, moving up towards your ribs then back down, almost resting on your ass.

He felt a surge of heat settle in his groin, aching to give you all the pleasure you deserved, to make you feel cherished and known. To knock any misery out of your head and replace it with euphoric sparks and reassurance. To be one with you again, if you’d have him.

He pulled away from the kiss, his eyes fluttering open. “Bedroom?”

A nod from you was all it took. He didn’t let you get up, instead holding your ass as he stood up, his lips back on yours as he carried you to your bedroom like he owned the place. His mind still had the spatial layout, it worked out and he eventually placed you onto the middle of the bed oh so delicately.

You knew what was coming, already taking your clothes off in a haste as you heard his belt come undone, the sound of his taking his shirt off, and his boots being kicked off.

It wasn’t long until he was on you again.

Leon took his time to look at your body. He was all too familiar with it, knowing exactly where certain beauty marks were, or the places that were sensitive to even the slightest fan of his breath. His fingertips ghosted over your sides, sucking in a sharp inhale as his eyes roamed all over, studying you as if you were his muse and he was about to draw you. “So beautiful…”

His lips had traveled all across you once upon a time. Leon had a great memory, perhaps one of his best features, though also his downfall. At times like these, it comes in handy. It almost seemed like a hazy flashback to the nights he had you splayed on the bed, pressing his lips against your forehead and making it all the way to the sensitive skin of your inner thighs.

He wanted to mimic the memory. “Need to taste you. Can I?”

“God, yes.” You agreed in a heartbeat, body already feeling all tingly at the anticipation.

He littered open mouthed kisses from the middle of your chest, all the way down to your end of your stomach, making your body ignite with flames and mind flood with an overwhelming sense of nostalgia. What day was it? Month? Year? You couldn’t remember, just desperately hoping this wasn’t some realistic feeling dream. You’ve had those too often, and if you woke up without him by your side, you felt like you would die from heartbreak.

He hooked his arms underneath your thighs to pull you close. His fingers dug into your thighs as he took another look at his favorite pretty cunt. He missed this. Missed you. Missed having you grind yourself against his face until he couldn’t breathe. Missed having his heart race from the angelic noises you blessed his ears with.

His nose pressed against your clit, applying light pressure as his tongue lapped at your slit, gathering the dew there. Geez, he really got right into it. Your eyes rolled back, your stomach tensing and your back arching. You could die right now by your (ex) lover’s tongue, what a way to go.

On the occasion that he opened his eyes, he’d look up at you through his light lashes — he swore you looked like an angel from his perspective.

“What is this? Your last meal on death row?” You were joking, but god…he really was making your mind go blank, he knew just all the right buttons to press.

“Oh, so you think I’m a criminal?”

Like always, you reached for his hair, pushing it back and hearing him growl out of contentment. He gave your clit gentle sucks before flattening his tongue against it and flicking it, his head moving side to side, repeating the process again and again.

One thing about Leon? He always found a way to turn you on by being vocal. His noises were muffled and sloppy but you could feel the vibration of all his whimpers and growls against you as he took his time eating you out. He was getting off to pleasuring you, and that fact alone made it so much hotter.

Your thighs were trembling, threatening to close in and squeeze his head. Leon placed one of his hands over your lower abdomen, applying light pressure with his palm and coaxing you into your orgasm.

It didn’t take you long to get there, you hadn’t felt a tongue on you in ages, he was your last.

“Leon, I’m—“

He already knew.

“That’s it, make a mess all over my face.” It sounded like a demand but instead it came across as a pitiful and desperate plea.

How many times had he been in this position? Lying on his stomach, your taste on his tongue, chin dripping with his drool and your wetness, feeling your body trembling…he couldn’t even count how many. But it was enough for him to know your body like no other.

He kept going even after your thighs started squeezing in on him, even with the way you unintentionally tugged at his hair enough to have him rutting against your sheets. He made sure to make your orgasm feel good, lapping at you all throughout until he heard a whine leave your lips and he felt you weakly push his head away — he didn’t want to overstimulate you and hurt you.

He finally took a breath, one that filled his lungs with satisfaction as he propped himself up on his elbows before sitting up. He ran a hand through his hair, feeling his blood pump south with the way you were still composing yourself, your legs twitching all cutely and your torso rising and sinking with each deep breath you attempted to take.

“Do you wanna…” Your eyes flitted down to the prominent tent in his pants, feeling a stirring in your stomach already.

“Do you?”

“Yeah. I mean…only if you want to.”

With his belt already in some corner of the room and his fly down, all that was left was discarding his pants and boxers down. He fished his wallet out and pulled a packet from it before doing so.

You were too distracted eyeing his now exposed dick, gulping. It had been a while. But a certain wrapper noise caught your attention. A condom. You had always been careful with him in the past, but you wanted him inside him without any barriers. To feel him entirely, his skin against your insides.

“Don’t, please?”

“But–“

“I need to feel you, Leon.”

“Already being a bad influence on me? What am I gonna do with you?” His jest was met with your roll of eyes, but the corners of your eyes crinkled, happy he was already comfortable enough to bicker a bit.

He pet your head, gazing fondly at you as he awaited your response.

“I just want to feel you as close as possible. I don't know how to explain it. You can pull out at the end…I dunno.”

You didn’t need to explain further, because he felt the same. He kissed your forehead, whispering “okay.”

Getting in between you and in position for missionary, he continued peppering kisses all over your face. He couldn’t hold back, he had so much to make up for, he owed you at least a thousand more. He pushed into you, a breathy moan leaving his lips, it felt like he had just entered the pearly gates. And the way your jaw hung open in a silent gasp told him you felt the same.

“You alright?”

“Mhm, keep going.”

“God, I missed you…” His thrusts made the bed creak, adding to the assortment of sounds of two bodies joined as one: skin against skin, high pitched gasps and occasional throaty groans, nails scratching against Leon’s back and leaving red marks in their wake, a subtle noise, but there nonetheless.

“Yeah? How much?”

“Too much. Could never get you outta my mind.” He admitted, burying his head against your neck to leave open-mouthed kisses all over, smiling when he felt you squirming. “Dreamt about you every night. Every…every morning I woke up, I thought you’d still be by my side.”

His response knocked the breath out of you, God if you could have him closer than physically possible, you would. This was the closest you’d be though, his tip hitting your g-spot, his body flush against yours, it was just the two of you in this never ending universe.

“Leon…Leon…fuck.” You called for him like you needed him to prevent you from crumbling.

He pinned one of your hands to the side of your head and laced his fingers between yours, his head remaining against your other side, raspy grunts and incoherent praises rumbling against your ear. He gently bit your earlobe, tugging at it and sending a shiver down your spine.

Despite all his self doubts, Leon knew how to love, how to send another person to cloud nine and make their head fuzzy with sheer euphoria. He wasn’t fucking you, he was loving you, there’s a clear difference.

His lips trailed to your jawline, eventually reaching your lips and initiating an uncoordinated make out session, the sound of dazed out whimpers and quiet growls mixing together perfectly.

He was getting there, his pace more erratic than before, his hand squeezing yours tightly. “You’re so pretty.” He mumbled against your lips, speaking in between rushed pecks. “Prettiest girl in the world.”

You managed to smile at that. “Yeah? Well you’re the prettiest boy in the world.”

You could’ve said handsome. Or hot. Or cute. But Leon was pretty, that was always the first thing that came to your mind. He was like a model, surely some agency would have tried to recruit him if he were actually in broad daylight more.

“Mm.” He liked the compliment. No more words were exchanged after that, he was focused on feeling you. Feeling the way you took all of him like it was nothing, clearly the two of you were physically made for one another.

There was no going back from this, Leon couldn’t bear the thought of getting a taste of happiness yet again and then falling back into a hopeless pit. He wouldn’t push you away again.

You were already sensitive from the way he had made you cum on his face earlier. You pulled away from his kisses, your head thrashing side to side against the pillow instead, your hips desperately bucking to meet his.

“Leon…”

“Just let go for me, you can do it.”

Moans ripped from your throat, your nails leaving crescent indents on his skin as your body writhed underneath him. Leon couldn’t take his eyes off of you as you came, his own stomach feeling tighter and tighter until he followed suit.

“I love you.” He let it slip at the very end, his mind too dazed and his emotions for you running at full blast. You would’ve replied if not for the way you were in awe, watching the way his eyebrows furrowed, his head tilted back, his mouth let out the raspiest grunts as he pulled out and came. Fuck, he couldn’t be real.

It was only then that Leon’s head cleared. He felt his heart sink to his stomach, had he said something wrong? The moment died down, he felt uncertain about how you’d react. Regardless, Leon took a moment to admire you in your flushed state before leaning down to kiss your head, then lying down beside you and pulling you to his side.

You were all dazed with his confession lingering in your head.

He still loved you. Maybe it was obvious, but hearing it aloud was a completely different feeling.

All the suppressed emotions between the two of you were being put on the spotlight. Your eyes brimmed with unshed tears, you tried to blink them away, but you failed.

Leon wished your eyes hadn’t gotten glossy and that your lips hadn’t tugged into a small frown. It made his heart physically ache. Heavy hearted, that’s what he felt like, swallowing to try to alleviate just how sore his throat felt all of a sudden. Guilt bubbled in his stomach because he knew he was the source of your tears.

He kissed away your tears, welcoming the salty taste of them.

He couldn’t tell you not to cry, he wasn’t in the position to. All he could do was reassure you instead, curling his hand into a fist before rubbing soothing circles onto your back as he watched you curl against him.

“Hey…”

“Sorry. I didn't mean to start crying. I just…you still love me? Did you mean that?”

“It’s okay. Just let it out, I'm here for you.” He had your head tucked underneath his chin. “And yeah…I never stopped.”

“I love you too.”

He wasn’t leaving this time.

Maybe that ring he held onto would find its true owner soon.

You, his sweet girl.

[nathaslosthershit]

Long Distance (LN4)

Summary: Long distance relationships are hard, especially when they both have very time consuming careers

Warnings; Angst (a whole lot), no happy ending in this part (will happen in pt 2)

Request: hi!! requesting a lando norris x female uni!reader if possible reader being a medical student or a one of the engineers on the paddock 🧍🏻‍♀️

Lando wasn’t known for being the smartest on the grid. He, like many other drivers, had only a few years of school to his name. But that still hadn’t stopped him from being able to somehow ‘woo’ a woman quite the opposite. 

His girlfriend was currently in her last year of medical school. While he was unbelievably proud of how far she had come, the difficulties of long distance have gotten to both of them, and there wasn’t much hope once she graduated and was off to a medical training program. With her studying for finals and Lando being off to a new country every two weeks for Grand Prixs, their relationship has been rocky to say the least.

Constant lack of communication and missing each other's calls had led them to have tons of unspoken dialogue. Each unanswered call created the smallest bit of resentment that just continued to grow and grow. 

No more sweet ‘goodmorning’ or ‘goodnight’ texts, no more wishing her well before a big test, no more sending ‘good luck baby!’ before qualifying. Just a few ‘how are you doing?’ and other bland messages you’d send to a coworker, not your significant other. 

After weeks of little communication, they had finally scheduled a ‘zoom date’. Not particularly the most romantic date they had been on, but it's the best they could do with their schedules. Lando called in late at night for him while his girlfriend had a lunch break in between labs. Time zones be damned.

Lando was 25 minutes late leaving only 35 minutes to actually talk to one another.

Her wifi was spotty so it kept freezing.

Finally, with only 5 minutes left, Lando decided to make a joke that there is no reason for her to continue going to labs, as he would be happy to be her ‘sugar daddy’. This was not very well received by his girlfriend, who responded with a quick “fuck you” and hung up early.

Lando was joking, a bit. He loved his girlfriend and saw a future with her, he just couldn’t stand long distance and any job in the medical field was bound to take up most of your time. He wanted her, but he also wanted someone who could be by his side on race day. That just wasn’t something that was possibly currently. 

He supported her. He loved to brag about how smart she was and how she was so dedicated to helping people. But that came with setbacks.

After a quick message from Lando (‘I was kidding darling. You know how proud I am of you. Lighten up a little, yeah?’), which she ignored, she was off to her labs in a worse mood than before. Things couldn’t go on like this. 

He hadn’t heard from her in three days. His “how are you, love?” and “Miss you lots. Hope your class is going better than my neck training :(“ went unanswered. She knew she was being petty, but maybe a relationship was just too hard for her life currently. 

After three long and stressful days of silence, she called him. With no message asking what she needed to speak about, Lando feared he already knew.

“We can’t keep doing this” She said after they quickly exchanged a ‘hi, how are you?’ ‘I'm good, how are you?’. 

“Baby, I told you it was just a-”

“I know that Lando! It's just that this isn’t the first time you have mentioned me quitting my career to be your housewife or whatever unrealistic idea you have stuck in your head.”

“I don’t need you to be a housewife! I don’t want that for you. I just try to let you know that you don’t need to worry about your future as much because I will always be there to help you.”

“But I want a career! I want to work hard so I can have a good future. You need to get it into your head that your career isn’t the only important one.”

“I don’t think that! Me wanting to let you know that I support you no matter what isn't diminishing your career plans! It would be nice if you started to show a little more support. I am so sick and tired of all our conversations revolving around you and how your day was. If classes are rough, or you are stressed, you don’t respond to me. I never know where I land with you. But god forbid I try to mention how hard my day was. I am just as sick of it.”

She didn’t know how to respond. It seems that all the times she has been more focused on how she was feeling she completely forgot to check on how he was doing. Before she can even muster out an apology, Lando jumps back in.

“Maybe you are right. I don’t think I can do this either. Not anymore.” He feels his stomach dropping as he says the words, not fully meaning them.

There is a long silence, moments where she wants to apologize, to try and reconcile. In that moment all of the good memories of their relationship come flashing back to her, as if her mind is begging her to do something. But she doesn’t. 

“Then I guess this is it.” She finally says. 

“I guess so.”

Part 2 out now!

[fumifooms]

Analysis of Laios’ succubus and theories on what it means - deep dive on Laios’ desires in human connections

Laios’ succubus is a very odd incident. I have some particular interpretations of why it was Marcille, and why things went down the way they did.

We know that a succubus shows what one desires, stated in canon as “an alluring form”; yes often in a romantic or sexual sense, as seen with Chilchuck’s succubus being entirely set on looks and seduction, meanwhile Marcille’s does have a focus on chivalrous noble demeanor as well, showing romantic behavior and personality. BUT with Izutsumi we also see that the liaison doesn’t have to be romantic or sexual at all, either, in Izutsumi’s case it’s a familial bond she craves. So perhaps we can say that the succubus exploits a desire based on connection, in whichever form that takes. Marcille wants an emotional connection foremost(which is also reflected in how it’s a character she knows very well and not a stranger. Perhaps romantic.), Chilchuck wants pleasure(a simple pleasure not unlike alcohol, perhaps such a connection is free of the more risky or unpleasant parts of a relationship, he doesn’t have to worry or to think and can just let himself go. Sexual.), Izutsumi wants a mother figure that can offer her warmth and comfort with who she doesn’t have to be tough (Familial), and I believe Laios’ is platonic and centered on his desire to have people with who he belongs and can be himself with…

But Laios’ case is more complex, it has layers. The thing is, even if Laios wanted to have someone able to turn him into a monster—which it didn’t even have to be, could straight up have just been a monster with such powers—, it didn’t have to be someone he knew. You could say the succubus wanted to disarm Laios’ suspicions with someone he knew and that was nearby, but the succubus seem very direct in every other case, simply appearing with someone’s greatest appearance even though both Marcille and Chilchuck were fully on guard and the succubi knew it. "Believability" isn’t an important factor. No, his succubus being someone he knew was important. It being Marcille was important.

There’s a TLDR at the end of this if you want to cut it short. For everyone else, strap in everyone, if you don’t know me hi I’m Fumi and I made this 3k words long analysis and theorizing bc I am autistic much like the character in question and I think this is both fascinating and has a lot to say. In this I offer both platonic and romantic reasonings and I do go rather in depth in Laios’ psychology and relationships to dissect what ever could this damn cryptic event MEAN. Spoilers for the succubus chapters obviously and also the last few arcs of the series so… Spoilers for the series as a whole!

—

So attraction wise it’s kinda unsure where Laios stands. He does sort of logically list off aesthetically pleasing traits of the orc’s wives, but besides that… Not really, or he never voices it anyways. He and Marcille never share like “omg you’re pretty” moments or anything. Senshi gets more compliments than either of them through the series lmfao. Maybe Laios is asexual, maybe he simply doesn’t show outwardly his attraction much or even maybe isn’t self-aware about it, regardless… Laios HAS implied preference for Marcille’s looks in the past. With the orcs, he said that “tallmen like long ears”. Laios’ shapeshifter of Marcille has her hair down just like her succubus, which by Kui is explained to be because she had it down when she revived Falin and it really marked him, though it could also be interesting to see it as his mental image of her as her most authentic self, I’ve seen it theorized that it’s a preference too but I think that’s disproven. But of course the most damning evidence itself… The succubus scene. It could have been anyone else in the party, certainly Senshi shares Laios’ interest in monsters much more already. We shouldn’t discredit the way Laios was blushing madly once she revealed she was a monster, that made her more attractive to Laios for sure, but he still wouldn’t have reacted that way if it was just anyone. The contexts are very different, but we can compare it to how Laios reacted when Lycion turned into a wolf man in front of him for instance. Laios certainly doesn’t act that way with Izutsumi- and it’s confirmed like a page later that he does see Izutsumi as a monster already. AND!! Laios starts blushing madly BEFORE she says that she can turn him into a monster- and we can safely assume that the blush isn’t out of simple fluster but out of desire/infatuation since he clearly wants her to bite him in the next page and his blush does not relent at all.

There’s something we could say about Laios’ liking of Marcille being born out of companionship rather than aesthetic attraction, on familiarity and intimacy. As members of the same party they’ve spent a lot of time together and we’ve seen that Laios trusts in her and relies on her for her skillset and avice. If Laios’ interest in her developped more naturally and gradually, valuing the familiar bond they have, I don’t see why he’d be acting all blushy and lovesick every time they interact or whatever, which is the explanation I have for Marcille genuinely being Laios’ most alluring form but him not freezing at the sight of it. That could also be a reason why he physically rejects succubus!Marcille instinctively, because something about her feels off or different (which is sorta the most direct interpretation of the scene, since Laios’ first thought is that it can’t be Marcille and must be a monster).

 [Edited in: Oh my god. The picture above is the last page of the dullahan chapter, chapter 57, a chapter that centers around Laios and Marcille’s relationship through flashbacks as Laios is on the brink of death and sees his life flashing before his eyes (he remembers how they first met, etc, which is also interesting to note that on the brink of death he reminisces about her the most). The last page of that chapter, more or less the thesis of the chapter in which we see Laios opens up about the real reason he and Falin go dungeon diving to her after them having a rough meeting but she turns out to also have an interest in dungeons, has Laios go "she starts out frowning but she ends up smiling! Wether its’s about eating monsters or about me :)”. That chapter is the one right before th succubus chapters. Laios’ most alluring form wasn’t “just” Marcille, it’s a SMILING Marcille. Which is why the succubus had such a weird and off demeanor right away (which gets knocked off once it doesn’t work and becomes a more Marcille-like Marcille)! It was only focused on smiling because it was the angle it was working from.

Oh my god it makes sense. It’s a direct narrative link, it’s as explicitly put with its story structure without Kui just stating it, besides, you know, the many times Laios says how precious her smile is to him. He’s like “I love her smile” and right next chapter the succubus is like “yes this is what he likes seeing most”. But… This also does mean that the focus might be less romantic, like Marcille’s significance doesn’t diminish, but then the alluring form might be less about her and more about the smile itself. About having a friend who looks at him like that, about someone who smiles after eating monster dishes or surpassing obstacles together… Or it can actually be so much more romantic. Like, maybe the smiling Marcille doesn’t work is because well, it’s not like Marcille, she wouldn’t just be smiling like that and behave like that (esp since his musing is about how her smiles are sort of “earned”, that she doesn’t smile right away but it’s sort of like a rewarding sight when she does). So then the most alluring form of Marcille doesn’t work because she doesn’t convincingly BEHAVE like her. His most alluring form isn’t a Marcille-lookalike, it’s her as a whole. More on the succubus shifting/switching in its approach later.]

Anyways.

Where was I. Ah yes, “It could have been anyone else in the party, certainly Senshi shares Laios’ interest in monsters much more already.” But then that’s the point isn’t it. I think Laios’ succubus being Marcille is because his wish isn’t so much focused on her, or on becoming a monster, but on not being alone. On being understood. On having others finally share his interest. On not only becoming a monster, but having someone to share that with. A trusted friend, a companion, or a lover, it matters little in my interpretation, the bedrock of it stays the same. And this is why it’d be someone he already knew instead of someone new, because it’d defeat the point, and it was maybe Marcille because she’s the most vocal about finding monsters disgusting: it’d have finally been a shift in her that she now liked monsters. And again this brings back to when he talks about her smile, when he says that she starts out unhappy with eating monsters, but ends up smiling by the end of it. Her smile itself represents that though first impression or reflexive dislike, someone can turn around and end up liking it anyways, it’s hope for his interests to be liked and perhaps for him to be lovable as well, that it’s possible to be accepted.

But I do think it would be a mistake to say that there’s absolutely no romantic interest, that it’s plainly platonic or another kind of interest misplaced and idealized in her. What we saw with the other succubus is that they 100% act in ways that the person desires, sure Izutsumi’s start attacking after a while, but that was after pushing them over the edge, and succubus Marcille wasn’t being agressive nor did she have a reason to be (even when she could have with Laios’ choking, she didn’t turn to violence, so she was 100% still in seduction mode). Ultimately the goal of the succubus is to make physical contact to be able to suck their essence, but the way they go about achieving that is tailored to the individual’s desire, Marcille’s kissed her hand and Izutsumi’s offered a hug.  The succubus can identify and embody complex desires, often subconscious ones, shown with Izutsumi’s. They go straight to it without complex subterfuge either. Chilchuck’s succubi were very direct because that’s what he wanted, Marcille’s was courtly because that’s what she wanted, Izutsumi’s offered motherly comfort and affection because that’s what she wanted, and Laios’ is Marcille attempting to kiss him. Let that sink in.

Laios why are you choking the supposed key to your heart?

Ok so the theory that Laios’ desire is to have a deeper companionship from an existing companion is pretty tame and surface level I’d say, but strap in… The way Laios reacted violently to Marcille trying to kiss him is VERY interesting. The first thing he thinks about is that she isn’t Marcille so she must be a succubus, then confusion at to why it’s her. He’s even afraid of what the others would think, feeling… Shame? With how he imagines Marcille would be horrified that he likes her that way. Fear of rejection?

But no no, what interests me is the shift that the succubus makes. It seemed very confident at first, went straight in, but when overpowered shifted the direction it was going in- shifted from a desire for Marcille to a desire for a monster Marcille and whatever deeper desire that hides. But??? Succubi did not make mistakes as to what someone wanted thus far, possibly that has never ever happened before by human records. Could the succubus truly have miscalculated what Laios desires? It’d be hard to imagine that the succubus would misunderstand what type of companionship someone wished for or what approach to take, since it’s done complex cases before too, Izutsumi being very much in denial before it & at first. In Izutsumi’s case, even with her complex feelings over it and her two souls desiring different things, the succubus did not miss its mark, and ultimately it was having a second soul for who the succubus wasn’t alluring that allowed her not to be frozen to the spot. But with Laios the succubus fully switches strategy.

The thing is that succubi don’t usually need to switch strategies, because the form and approach they take always work and always leave the victim frozen. Izutsumi bypassed this because of her two souls, but was still frozen and struggling to reject the succubus at first. And yet? Laios did. A succubus’ victim is supposed to be instantly frozen, and yet Laios acts on instinct and defensively agressive as soon as his reaction time allows. And well, it’s hard to really come to a logical conclusion as to why, since we have no idea of what rules can override a succubus’ temptation besides multiple souls… C’mon regular Marcille can’t be the winged lion/kenksuke’s desire bc of the loose hair being Laios’ mind-Marcille we’ve gone over this /hj Although, since it’s confirmed that the winged lion was watching with the dream Laios gets induced right after, maybe he’s what allowed Laios to be moving? It’s possible that it’d have frozen him otherwise, even if Laios with his full rationale wouldn’t have accepted the kiss faced with supernatural allure he might have gotten paralysis from being overwhelmed, similarly to how if Chilchuck had his full rationale he wouldn’t allow a woman like his succubus to kiss him (he’s always stayed faithful to his wife even after 4 years of separation, give the guy his earned credit). Getting somewhat offtopic, but something to say about how if that’s the case once again the theme of ‘irrational desire you crave vs what you truly want/need’ that is present throughout the manga would be reflected.

My best guess however on why Laios reacted so quickly and forcefully is: trauma. The more recent arcs with Laios suggest that Laios has deep-seated trauma over humans. He dislikes humans as a whole, that was like, pretty much stated, though perhaps exaggerated. As a kid he fantasized about monsters wiping out human towns. We know Laios has been ostracized for most of his life by others, in his village and in the military, and beyond social rejection it’s shown he got beaten in group too and it was implied that it happened regularly. But damn, disliking humans to the point of wanting to be a monster and murderous genocidal reclusive envies and all of that stuff? That is massive trauma, massive identity & belonging issues and hint at massive trust issues.

So then, the negative reaction could be because of Laios’ deep trauma with humans. Because of trauma getting activated, not due to a miscalculation on the succubus’ part but due to a contradicting dislike of the desire that makes the form inherently and straight out of the gate un-alluring, Laios’ repression being so strong that he’s able to affect his own desires in that way, or an instinctive defense response to the trigger (a human).   Even though Laios hides it well, once again recent arcs (and some other moments) make it clear that Laios still has some innate dislike of humans, which in canon is a term that all races like elves fit in. He has a bias against them, perhaps even an innate distrust of them. Who knows how aware he is of it, or how much control and will he has over it. What if Laios reacting agressively to it was his defense mode tied to this kicking in, a survival and security instinct, stopping any possibility of Laios wanting a romantic relationship with a human? Any chance of that human getting close and being hurt by it, either rejected or stabbed in the back? It’d then make sense if Laios is unaware and doesn’t understand his attraction to Marcille then, if it’s a sort of self-made blockage, denial. And that’d make full sense with how, when Marcille is suddenly a monster, then all of Laios’ reluctance is gone and he’s fully enthralled, all that it took was taking away that one blockage for Laios to be utterly charmed. It takes away the trigger element, humans, and replaces it for something safer. A desire for connections, but connections with people that are ‘safe’, people who also don’t fit in with society, who are part of his interest in monsters, who would accept and understand him. I think that Laios does desire human connections, specifically, but can’t allow himself to pursue them either from conscious or unconscious trauma, so though he does desire it he can’t accept that he does/can’t accept the relationship even if it’s handed to him on a silver platter.

Conclusion

The succubus’ shift could then be either that it switched from one wish, a wish for Marcille, to another, a wish for companionship in monster-liking, or that it stayed on the same fundamental wish, but had to improvise with the new information (that Laios is human-averse)(not bc it didn’t exist previously but bc it wasn’t manifested) to take out of the equation the thing that was holding Laios back (from giving in).

But well, the fact that the rest of the party is included does lean towards the former, but in any case that doesn’t erase all I’ve spoken about, all about how Marcille is 100% the focus of this whole thing. It could still be a bit of both. But it is interesting that he worries about the party’s reaction to seeing his succubus being Marcille, and when she shifts into monster Marcille he *still* worries about the others: “b-but what about the others?” He’s a mess, with his most alluring form seducing him, and he still has a shred of resistance in him to question how the others would react, and it’s only when she says that they’re already monsters too that he truly gives in. Is he really so afraid of ostracization? Of losing the people he cares about due to judgement? Then the mention of the others in the party can simply be something the succubus added on top to unlock another “blockage”, the same way she added Marcille being a monster on top of the basic premise of Marcille; Take out the immediate dismissal of humans first, and then the fear of loss and judgement from other friends so Laios can finally stop worrying and give in. That worry/framing I’d say makes the latter more credible, because it’s not the premise of the alluring form but an extra.

In the end, like the recent arcs kind of spell out, the thing central to Laios’ character is less so a love for monsters and moreso a dislike for humans, and this is what this puts on full display.

Laios’ most alluring form is Marcille, a human that doesn’t understand his interests and thus him, and regardless of everything else that Marcille is, that is so traumatic to him that all of his being immediately rejects it.

—

Thanks for coming to my ted talk! I’ve spent so much time thinking about this and wording and rewording this same train of thought, also it’s the end of my college semester and I’m going crazy

Tldr: My personal fav theory for Laios’ succubus is that Laios really values Marcille’s smile a ton like it’s often mentioned, and that’s what his most alluring form centers on. I’ve got a ton of different interpretation on the why it’d go for a kiss? Since it tailors its approach to the person’s desires, but obviously something goes wrong with Laios’, which is really interesting because even with Izutsumi who resists because she has 2 souls so one part of her can always remain unaffected, the succubus hit bullseye on her most alluring forms. But regardless of that, I think his desire for Marcille (either her or what she represents, wether as a platonic ideal or something else) isn’t wrong/untrue perse, but that Laios has such a complex with humans and intimacy and connecting with others that his defense mode kicks in and that’s when the succubus has to shift into a different, safer desire: one that doesn’t involve humans but that still shows connections and acceptance and belonging. Also Laios realizes that it isn’t Marcille when she goes in for the kiss, which if his allure for her is based on familiarity since they’re friends and all could make sense that it’d break him away from it, or since it’s a liking based on familiarity he doesn’t freeze, or maybe it’s because the winged lion has its eye on him. I think that’s so much more likely with how Kui makes even her jokes be character moments or at least consistent, and also with the tension of the scene, than just the scene being a gag about how Marcille doesn’t mean much to Laios actually.

I think there’s a lot to be said about why Marcille is special to Laios, why her smile means something to him, etc, and I don’t think saying Marcille is special to him is exaggeration or reaching at all. Laios, Marcille and Falin are the golden trio, she’s the deuteragonist, she’s the only other character in the main party whose goal in going back for Falin is Falin and who has a bond with her and Laios outside of being coworkers, in post-canon they live together, happily, in the anime’s ending they’re emphased on by dining out all three together... I could go on.   Marcille has the benefit of being very trusted by Laios, not only with the time they’ve spent together but how she was Falin’s friends first, the person he himself feels so protective of and has been so consistently ostracized throughout her life. Marcille represents a positive odd one out that’s like, the good example of "humanity can be good and safe and warm actually".  Which is a big reason why imo Marcille is like, the secondary protag and with Falin they form the golden trio. She’s central to the story in many ways including making Laios see that humanity is worth saving and sticking with, but that’s a topic for another analysis. One such reason is how his first meeting with her went: it started really badly but ended with her coming around and unexpectedly sharing their interest in dungeons, which made him and Falin open up about the real reason they go dungeon diving, perhaps for the first time. There is just so much that goes into it but Laios seems generally very expectant of rejection: in the climax chapters after he transformed back as a human and was hiding out in the woods, pre-canon in an extra where we see him battling himself on if he should suggest eating monsters or not. But another one, the one I truly want to bring up in this post, is how genuine Marcille is! And funnily enough, how dramatic she is, and how her elf ears change position depending on her emotions. Like, let me compare her affectionately to a dog for a second, but dogs move their ears and use whole body language to communicate, and I think that part of Marcille, really strong emoting, with her ears and body language on top of her often dramatic facial expressions, reassure him. Like ok, maybe he can’t tell when Shuro and Kabru would lie to him, but Marcille? She wears her heart on her sleeve and her feelings on her whole self. And that takes away some of the stress and trauma he has with humans, explains why her smiles would “put him at ease”, doesn’t it?

I don’t remember wether I’ve mentioned this somewhere or just in my reblog linked at the end of the post, but while at first I thought the succubus going for a kiss on the lips heavily implied a romantic desire in Laios,  now I have a couple different theories on why the succubus would have gone for that approach. I think the most likely is that, if the principal allure of his succubus is her smile, the succubus is like "as long as he sees her face right up until i can suck up his blood and he passes out I’ll be gucci", so it’s not about the kiss but about him seeing her face all the while until the very last moment, so he stays charmed.

Btw chapter 34 explores Laios’ relationship with touch too imo, and we see that he is uncomfortable with touch to some degree, very unsure and hesitant and tense. I feel like it’s something more shown in a bigger picture sense with his whole struggles with humans and extras, than just in any one page so go reread the beginning of that chapter if you want I’d say, but putting a page below as example anyways. I think it’s notable that it’s a character moment shared with Marcille too, she acts sort of like a bridge to humanity with social propriety and being extroverted in many cases. In the chapter Chil and Marcille point out how awkward he is with touch, but he learns to be casual/comfy enough about touch to do healing magic with her (something that was also enforced through him having to practice magic on Marcille turned to stone, he got a lot of touch exposure and magic practice done in those days. Dammit Laios, MArcille and touch is worthy of a whole analysis of its own). She’s just like, his human comfort zone, even if they aren’t that close at least at first, besides Falin he has literally like no friends and I think that itself shows how he doesn’t fit in well socially and that it’s a significant struggle for him. But yes what I was saying here is I believe there’s setup for him recoiling from touch like he did with the succubus (due to an instinctive aversion to touch made especially intense due to the succubus’ oddness and forwardness).

I have even more theories and rambling on details on the succubus here in a reblog, but unless I want to put in some pictures of Laios repressing himself around others and such I don’t think I’ll be touching this post again in a while

[fxrmuladaydreams]

drunken bets (cs55)

carlos x mclaren social media!reader

summary: carlos makes a bet with a few other drivers, claiming that he can get you, a new (introverted) mclaren employee, to fall for him

notes: what can i say? i love writing driver x mclaren worker apparently 😂 i think it’s because she can be bffs with lando and oscar and that makes me soft. someone had to be the villian/bad influence so i’m sorry drunk pierre/lance. i hope you guys like the “she fell first, he fell harder” trope

next part

The music in the club blasts through the speakers. Drinks are thrown back as warm bodies dance, or more so grind, against each other to the beat.

Carlos feels the buzz from the alcohol coursing through him. He takes drink after drink. He deserves to relax after this race weekend, hangover be damned. He’s approached countless times by girls looking to spend some time with him, all to which he brushes off, choosing to go home alone at the end of the night.

“C’mon man, what’s up?” Lance asks as Carlos sends another breathtaking girl away. “You’re just not in the mood?”

“I don’t think he can do it. I think he needs his “smooth operator” title revoked.” Pierre drunkenly laughs.

Carlos scoffs, pushing Pierre away by his shoulder. “I could get any girl I wanted. Try me.”

Pierre grins and nods. “Alright,” he looks around the club and nods to a blonde at the bar. “How about her?”

Lance shakes his head. “No, that’s too easy. She’s been staring at him all night.”

Pierre points out a few more girls, all of whom have already expressed some kind of interest in the Spanish driver, until an idea pops into his head.

“What about that new McLaren girl?”

Carlos knew who he was talking about almost instantly. You were a newer part of McLaren’s marketing team. While most others from the team could be found creating content with the boys, you tended to keep yourself behind a computer. Lando said you were hired to do things like edit videos or photos, more behind the scenes stuff.

Others had taken an interest in you when you had shown up. A few engineers or pit crew from other teams attempted to get closer with you, all while you turned them down with a quick no. Hell, even Pierre tried to shoot his shot, but you very quickly shut him down.

You tended to stick closer to Lando and Oscar, both boys somehow able to get you to open up to them.

“You mean Y/n? She won’t date anyone.” Lance shrugs.

“Yeah, so I don’t think Mr. Smooth Operator could get her to date him.” Pierre smirks.

“I could.” Carlos is quick to defend. “Easy.”

“Alright then, let’s make this interesting. You get Y/n to have actual romantic feelings for you, and I’ll give you one hundred euros.”

Carlos reaches his hand out for Pierre to shake. “Deal.”

Carlos wakes up with a pounding headache the next morning, the sun streaming in way too bright through his hotel window. He drags himself out of bed and into the shower, attempting to feel a little more like a human before he actually has to go outside and face the world.

He eats a simple breakfast, something that doesn’t make him feel like he’s about to puke his guts all over his plate. Then he finally starts to pack his suitcase for his trip back home.

He checks his phone before pushing it into his pocket. He sees a few message notifications from Pierre and Lance.

From Lance

Insane night last night. I never want to drink again.

From Pierre

I honestly don’t remember much from last night, but I do remember a bet, and I can’t wait to be 100 euros richer

Carlos groans as he remembers the bet he made the previous night. There’s no way they’re going to let this go, they’ll make sure it hangs over his head until the end of time.

A selfish part of him wants to go on with the bet, to prove that even though he’s had some time being single for a while, he’s still a hot ticket item in the dating world. It wouldn’t hurt his image either, he thinks. If he’s seen pursuing and dating someone who isn’t a model it could make him look like he’s matured, like he’s ready to settle down instead of spending his nights in different beds wherever they travel.

From Carlos

I think you mean 100 euros poorer

The next race weekend he makes it a point to hang around the McLaren garage. No one’s surprised to see him there, given his close friendship with Lando, so the striking Ferrari red practically goes unnoticed in the sea of papaya.

He keeps an eye out for you as he sits with Lando, excusing himself when he spots you making your way towards them. You’ve got a set of headphones on over your ears, clearly enthralled by whatever you’ve got playing on the tablet you’re holding.

He pulls his phone out of his pocket and starts walking in your direction, scrolling through whatever social media app he happened to quickly open. He walks until his shoulder bumps into yours, a little too rough, nearly knocking the tablet out of your hands.

Carlos wraps an arm around your waist, keeping you upright, and manages to catch the tablet with his other hand.

“Are you alright?” He asks, flashing you a smile.

You nod and take a step back from him. “I’m okay, are you?”

He swipes a hand through his hair, then holds your tablet out for you to take. “I’m good. It’s Y/n, right?”

“Yeah, I’m at McLaren.” You tilt your head towards the McLaren garage.

“Yeah, I can see that.” He laughs, glancing down at your papaya team kit.

“Right, sorry.” You laugh. “I should probably go, filming and editing to do and what not.”

Carlos gives you a smile and a nod followed by a quick goodbye. He brushes his arm against yours as he walks away. He has to keep himself from looking back at you to see your reaction, but gets a text from Lando later in the day that gives him the satisfaction he was looking for.

From Lando

What did you do to my editor?

The next time Carlos sees you, he recreates your first meeting, bumping into you just so he can wrap his arms around you again.

“We have to stop meeting like this.” He laughs, holding you.

You laugh with him and shake your head. Your hands rest against his chest from attempting to catch yourself. “We really do.”

He smiles as he lets go of you, but keeps himself planted where he’s standing, giving you his undivided attention.

“I saw the recent McLaren video, it was really good. It kind of makes me wish you worked here when I was with McLaren.” He says tilting his head up teasingly.

“It’s mostly my coworkers, I pretty much just make it look good after it’s filmed.” You tell him, you duck your head down to avoid his gaze.

“Still.” He shrugs.

He’s pulled away by Charles after that, who gives you a quick hello before dragging Carlos back to Ferrari’s garage.

You see Carlos a lot more now around McLaren. You chalk it up to his friendship with Lando, but you begin to notice his seeking you out. He shares meals with you now, even if he ends up sitting with you while you’re focus is locked on your laptop.

Carlos is surprised to find that he’s started to genuinely enjoy your company, that he actually looks forward to seeing you every race weekend. He shakes away the feeling that blossoms in his chest whenever he sees you, afraid of becoming too attached.

That all flies out the window when he’s headed back to his hotel one day though. Dark clouds covered the sky, turning it almost black as rain poured down. You could hear thunder rumbling in the distance, likely headed towards the track.

Carlos sees you standing under the awning of McLaren hospitality, looking up at the sky. You’ve got your phone in your hand and a disgruntled look on your face.

He lifts his bright red umbrella up over his head and dashes over to the McLaren building. He puts his umbrella back down once he’s standing next to you, shaking the drops of water off.

“Did you forget an umbrella?” He asks.

You turn away from your phone to look up at him. He’s got a teasing smile on his face. The humidity in the air has made his hair impossibly fluffier, but somehow still picture perfect. He’s bundled up in a Ferrari windbreaker, his backpack slung over his shoulder.

“Yeah. And I walked here from the hotel today, so I can either try to get a taxi or I can wait until the weather clears up.” Just as you finish explaining your problem thunder booms above you.

Carlos shakes his head. “Yeah, no. I’m not letting you walk out in this.” He gestures to the sky.

“Well the other option is find a taxi.”

“I’ll drive you.” He says it as if it’s an obvious solution. Before you can respond he wraps an arm around your waist, pulling you close to him so that you’re both under his umbrella, then starts walking towards the parking lot.

You try to keep up with his pace, occasionally bumping into him, but he makes sure to hold the umbrella over the both of you. He leads you to his car, and holds the umbrella over you as you climb into the passenger side.

You notice how water clings to his hair, drops falling down his coat on his right side, evidence of him prioritizing keeping you dry over himself.

“Carlos, you could get sick, and it’d be my fault.” You scold him.

He shrugs and gives you a smile. “Then you’ll just have to nurse me back to health.”

He parks at the entrance to the hotel McLaren had booked, and walks you into the building. When you expect him to leave, he places a hand on your lower back guiding you to the elevator. He walks you all the way to your door, and leaves you with a “goodnight” and a soft squeeze of your hand.

You get a text from him later that night.

From Carlos

Lando gave me your number. What time should I pick you up tomorrow?

From Y/n

You don’t have to, that’s okay

From Carlos

That’s not an answer cariño

You feel yourself start to smile at the message on your screen and text him what time you usually leave.

He picks you up the next morning, driving you to the track with him. You make conversation about little things like how you slept and what you had for breakfast. He’s quick to run over to your side of the car to open the door for you, and keeps himself close to you as you enter the paddock.

He meets you at the end of the day as well to drive you back to the hotel. He keeps up this new routine each race weekend following. He enjoys your company, and you seem to enjoy his. After a few weekends you could say you have a new chauffeur in the form of a Ferrari driver.

With this new closeness to Carlos comes a wave of media attention you should have expected. Photos are posted over social media of the two of you walking together, you looking up at Carlos with bright eyes, or him looking down at you with his doe eyes.

It’s easy to tell that all of the new attention makes you uncomfortable, but you don’t want to lose your friendship with Carlos so you stick it out. You’re grateful when you see a clip of an interview with Carlos where he’s asked about you, and he sets the record straight.

“There’s nothing going on, we just like to hang out together. We’re just friends.” He smiles.

Although you’re glad he’s put an end to the speculation, you can’t help but feel like your recent hangouts have been only barely platonic. After the nights you’ve claimed are “movie nights” that have turned into falling asleep in each other’s arms, it’s hard to put a platonic label on your relationship.

The first time it happens, it’s you who wakes up first. His chest is warm beneath your head, and his arms lock you against his body. You tilt your head up to look at him. His hair is unkempt, yet still looks effortlessly good. You reach up and brush a few strands away from his face. You watch him for a few minutes, wondering how you were so lucky to be spending your time with someone so beautiful. You rest your head back on his chest and let sleep wash over you again, listening to the soft beats of his heart.

Carlos wakes up not long after you’ve gone back to sleep, lifting an arm to run a hand through his hair. He can feel the little puffs of air from your breathing against his chest, his heart melts when you subconsciously nuzzle your face deeper into him to get more comfortable. You look so sweet, so soft, and a part of him hates himself for it. He let himself accept that stupid bet, and he let himself fall for you. He wishes he’d never let his friends talk him into making that bet, but he also decides he’d never trade the time he’s spent with you for anything.

He’s pulled out of his thoughts when you slowly lift yourself up off of him. He misses your warmth as soon as he can’t feel it anymore.

The two of you continue spending your evenings together, wanting nothing more than to keep falling asleep wrapped up in one another.

He finds himself searching for you in the crowd at parties and events, even those he knows you won’t be at, just so he can spend more time with you. He texts you everyday you’re apart to make sure that you’ve eaten and gotten enough sleep.

Carlos can’t bear the thought of being away from you for more than a week between races. He casually mentions that he’s going back to Spain for the small break, and asks if you want to join him.

You laugh and scoff shaking your head. “Yeah, right.”

“I’m serious, it could be fun. You could relax a little bit. I could take you on my boat. C’mon.” He persuades you.

“I wouldn’t want to intrude on your time off.”

“You’re not. I want you there, I promise. Please?” He takes your hands in his, swinging them back and forth. He gives you his best puppy dog eyes and bats his eyelashes at you.

“Alright, I’ll go with you.” You sigh, but can’t stop the smile from spreading over your face.

It’s different, sharing a space with Carlos outside of the four-walled hotel rooms you’ve stayed in for work. It feels intimate being with him in his home country. He books a private villa to stay in on the beach.

The trip quickly feels more romantic than friendly, what with him cooking your dinner for you, and your evenings in either the hot tub or curled up together on the couch.

You spend your days with Carlos on his boat. You reading a book you brought with you, and Carlos laying out in the sun to tan.

It’s hard not to stare at him, his tanned toned chest on display, while his swim trunks hang low on his hips. He has just as much trouble keeping his eyes away from you as well, he can’t help but watch you as you scamper around the boat in a different little bikini everyday.

Occasionally he convinces you to hop in the water with him, to which you reluctantly agree. You keep your arms locked around him when you feel something brush against your leg in the water. Carlos keeps a firm hold on your waist as he can’t stop laughing at your distress.

Eventually you get back on his boat and sit side by side on the edge, with your feet dangling in the water. You stare down at the crystal blue sea, looking for any creatures swimming around.

Carlos looks back out to the shore. The smile that’s been plastered on his face for the last few days falls when he sees a figure on the beach. They’re far enough away that he can’t really tell who it is, but close enough that he can see the camera in their hands.

He leans back and grabs a towel, laying it over your shoulders, covering up the skin you had on display. He wraps a protective arm around you and pulls you closer to his chest, in hopes that the photos he knows will be everywhere in a few days won’t be clear enough to reveal you in them.

That night he decides to cook on the boat, which turns out to be a little more chaotic than he’d originally planned. He struggles to keep everything straight, but finds it all worth it in the end when he gets to see you surrounded by the sunset. You look breathtaking, looking out into the sea. The soft breezes wisps your hair away from your face. The sinking sun casts a gold light to wash over you.

He wants to tell you how he feels, but he knows he needs to come clean. Maybe you’ll forgive him, he hopes you will. He needs to put this in the past so that he can love you publicly and wholeheartedly.

You quietly share your meal, then break the silence simultaneously.

“I have something I need to tell you.”

“Carlos-”

“You first.” He nods.

You take a deep breath. “Carlos, I want to thank you for bringing me here, and really for spending all this time with me. I’m glad you bumped into me at the paddock because I’ve gained a new friend from it. You’re one of the best men I know, and I really appreciate you taking care of me.”

“Thank you.” He feels his chest tighten at your words.

“The truth is, I’ve come to care about you a lot more than I thought I would. A few of the other drivers tried to ask me out when I was first hired, but I told them no. I was happy when you didn’t try to make a move on me, and instead wanted to pursue a friendship with me.” You look down at your hands, and fiddle with your fingers. “But if you did try to make a move on me now… I don’t think I’d mind it…” Your last sentence comes out quieter than the others.

“Really?” Carlos asks, a soft smile growing on his face.

You clear your throat. “What were you going to say?”

He can’t tell you now. He can’t poison this perfect moment, after you’ve confessed your feelings to him.

“I was going to say that I feel the same way.”

[writerblue275]

Ranking Heartsteel members from least to most dom. (With some explanation) 😏

Inspiration: It just popped in my head and wouldn’t leave so here we are......blame Ezreal.

Genre: Ranking

Category: SMUTTTTT (18+ ONLY UNDER THE KEEP READING. MINORS DNI.)

Gender: I’ll do my best to be gender neutral. I am AFAB, so please understand that’s where my perspective comes from, especially from an anatomical standpoint. That being said, I’ll try to keep language as GN as possible.

TW: NSFW as FUCK. Mentions quite a few kinks: Dirty talk, dom/sub dynamics, BDSM, etc...you have been warned.

Now that we have the logistics out of the way, are we all ready then? Lovely! Let's begin...😈

Important context: There’s an assumption here that everything is consensual. I’d never write anything about non consensual acts. Consent and communication are always CRITICAL. Also, this headcanon primarily applies to an established romantic relationship between member and reader, but I do think there are some things that could carry over into a FWB arrangement or something so have fun imagining that.

Least

- Ezreal

Do you know what’s hilarious? I actually have differing headcanons for Heartsteel Ezreal and like base-skin Piltover Ezreal. (I know Riot said it’s all the same universe and everything is canon, but are you really going to put Heartsteel Ezreal next to base-skin Ez, Debonair Ez, or Ace of Spades Ez and tell me they have the completely same vibes? To use my favorite GIF of Viktor from Arcane:)

But back to the reason we’re here. Let’s bffr, we all know this is the right spot for Heartsteel Ezreal.

He exudes such sub energy lmao. Like that’s baby boy right there. (He LOVES when you call him that BTW.)

You are absolutely going to be the one in control in your intimate relationship and that also includes aftercare. You will be taking care of him.

This chaotic man is a certified B R A T. The BRATTIEST of brats. And you just know it’s all on purpose to get a reaction out of you. 😂

Not shy at all about letting you know he’s needy. I’m not sure Ezreal (in any fucking universe lmao) has a subtle bone in his body. He definitely isn’t afraid to get a little whiny/clingy/handsy (but not like inappropriately so if you’re in public) in order to get his message across.

Likes to try and take the lead when you let him, but eventually he gets tired and you have to take back over.

Could he escape when you tie his wrists to the headboard? Absolutely, but why would he do that when he absolutely loves it? Also loves when you blindfold him. Oh, and he has the BIGGEST praise kink (receiving). Like be sure to tell him how good he’s being for you.

Wants you to use toys on HIM. Be creative and tease the hell out of him. It’s what he gets for being a brat.

He’s absolutely walked into rehearsal covered in love bites before, much to Alune’s dismay, so now you have to be a little more discreet about where you mark him. But believe me, he definitely wants you to.

- Aphelios

I was having such a difficult time figuring out how to classify Aphelios. Like I truly couldn’t figure out if he’d be dom or sub. Then it hit me….

He’s BOTH. The man is a fucking SWITCH. (HELL YEAH FOR SWITCHES.) Still a little unsure if he leans more dom or sub, but my gut is saying a bit more sub, so that’s what we’re going with.

There are days when he gets home and he needs to get his frustration/stress out. Those are the days he’s more dominant. Then there are other days where Phel is just damn tired and needs to be taken care of by his favorite person (you). Those are definitely the days he’s more submissive.

On those days, please pamper this man. He works so hard…

Even if traditional dirty "talk" can't be a part of your relationship, Phel’s a very creative man, as you know, and he will let you know how he feels, whether you're with him or not.

The absolute MASTER of sexting. Like you’ve been in meetings and your phone buzzes, and it’s just your lovely boyfriend texting you the most incredibly filthy stuff. You even had a coworker once ask if you were alright, you were so flushed. But my friend, TEASE HIM BACK. One afternoon Yone had to whack him on the back after he took a sip of water, looked down at his messages from you, and started coughing.

I’ve discussed previously (HERE) that I don’t think he’s had a ton of relationships before you, so I think the broadening of horizons in your physical relationship will take time. Butttttttt…..

This man is a very fast learner. (I’ve said it before and I will say it again: The quiet ones are always the most perceptive.) He knows exactly where and how to touch you in order to hear you gasp and moan. (Your body is an instrument, and as we all know, Phel is GREAT at playing instruments.) As he learns more about you and your body, he is willing to try new things with you. He trusts you deeply.

Whether or not he’s on top, Aphelios likes positions that allow him to see your face, and more importantly to him, allow you to see his face. Because he can’t verbally tell you how incredible you are and how much he loves you in the moment, it’s really important to him for you to be able to get that message somehow, and his face is very expressive. (Especially his eyes.)

Doesn’t matter if you’re leading aftercare or he is, it’s one of his favorite parts. The intimacy between the two of you while in this “vulnerable” state, taking such gentle care of each other, makes him melt. (Despite all the sass and the smolder in photos, he’s become a bit of a romantic.)

(A/N: Ok Yone and K’Sante I could also see being flipped here. I feel like they’re similar in “level” of dom, if that makes sense.)

- Yone

So Yone is definitely where we cross over into members who are for sure more dominant. Like he’d let you lead if you asked, but he’d absolutely be in control most of the time.

Similar to Aphelios, he knows EXACTLY how to read your body. (Those quiet men and their awareness!!!!) An extremely fast learner when it comes to what flusters you, gets you in the mood, and your favorite things he does.

Do not be afraid to be vocal with him. He loves hearing your noises when he does something very right. And he loves hearing you talk (especially when you say his name). He’ll always verbally confirm with you that you’re still enjoying yourself. And don’t worry about being too loud. He’ll soundproof the bedroom if necessary (he knows where to get extra soundproofing foam since he redid his whole studio).

“That’s it, my love…say my name again for me…let me hear you…” (🫠 <- Oh look it’s me!)

I ranked him the most romantic member for a fucking REASON (though I still think him and Sett are basically neck and neck). I think what really takes Yone up in the romance arena are his pet names for you (HERE).

There’s no one better to create mood music. And you know he puts in EFFORT. Along with mood music, I can absolutely see him giving you roses and slow dancing around your apartment to just set the VIBES. (Fucking immaculate vibes right there.)

While I can’t see Yone having too many “wild” kinks or fantasies, one that I absolutely can see him enjoying is shibari. Of course he’s very gentle and makes sure you’re not too uncomfortable (this sweet sweet man).

As I said earlier, he definitely likes to hear you, so dirty talking (both giving and receiving, but especially receiving) is for sure a big kink of his. And you love when he murmurs/whispers the sweetest yet dirtiest things into your ear.

Primarily prefers positions where he can see your face, but I also think surprisingly he’d like to hit it from behind. Especially when shibari is involved.

Very very sweet with aftercare. He thoroughly checks you over, making sure you’re feeling alright, and wipes you down before whisking you away to a bath. That’s when cuddly Yone comes out and he’s not leaving your side for the rest of the evening.

- K’Sante

K’Sante? He knows how to treat a partner RIGHT. He’s setting the mood throughout the entire fucking DAY. But you know what makes it even better? It doesn’t even have to be a special occasion. It could be a random Thursday and he’s still going all out.

I suppose that makes him the king of foreplay since he knows how to play the long game. This man is a PATIENT dom. What a fucking tease omg. (Those are his biggest kinks btw. Foreplay and teasing (both giving)).

Buys you a full outfit he knows (not thinks, KNOWS) will look incredible on you. Includes lingerie if that’s something you like. Of course he’s right. It really did look great on you and you got so many compliments that you couldn’t help but feel amazing and sexy. He also takes care of any small things you usually do so you can focus on yourself.

Sending you texts that gradually get flirtier and spicier throughout the day. Might even leave you a voice message or voice mail (with a text warning first to use your headphones because he’s smart like that).

All of this makes it so you’re ready to pounce on K'Sante the second he gets home. You’re ready to climb this giant man like a fucking tree.

That’s EXACTLY what he was trying to do. He can’t help but chuckle as he carries you to the kitchen instead of the bedroom, ignoring your complaints. He just smirks widely down at you once he sets you on the counter and softly but confidently, brooking no argument, says, “Not on an empty stomach, baby. You and I both know that’s unwise.” (He’s absolutely right.)

But worry not. The fun starts after you finish the delicious dinner he made. He’ll put you right back on the counter and enjoy his “dessert” first. 😉

Eventually though, even the master of the long game finally loses his patience (he played himself just a little bit). I think because of that, he’d be just a bit rough with you (though of course nothing that you dislike). You’re up against the wall/door of the bedroom as soon as you enter. When K'Sante doesn’t play the long game, I definitely think he’s much gentler and more romantic with you. Even without the long game he’s still definitely a fan of foreplay like oral or toys. He’s making sure you’re prepared for him.

Loves positions where he can show off his strength. He works hard for it, and what better way to reap the benefits than to use it to make you feel good? Loves anything that involves carrying you around.

I can totally see K’Sante being great at aftercare. He’d heat up some leftover food for you and get you a Gatorade (hydration!!!) after helping you clean up. And I fully believe cuddling him is one of the best things ever.

- Sett

Settrigh (that’s right, FULL NAME TO START) is not only dominant as fuck, but he’s one of the most ROMANTIC doms of the group and you will not convince me otherwise.

Outside of the bedroom? You have Sett wrapped around your little finger. This man worships the ground you walk on. (Lucky!!)

But intimacies? That’s his domain. He’s here to give you what you and your body NEED. You just have to give him the keys and let him drive. (“Let him cook” as the kids today say [lmao I swear I’m not even that old]).

When he’s with you, his goal isn’t even to find his own pleasure. Remember when I said acts of service (giving) is one of his love languages? 😉 (Same headcanon linked in Phel's.)

His goal? To make sure you feel loved/give you as much pleasure as you want. THAT’S how he finds his pleasure, knowing you’re feeling out-of-this-world because of what HE’S doing.

The master at creating romantic ambience. An incredible homemade meal by candlelight, a rose petal trail/petals covering the bed, special surprises (toys, lingerie, candles, music), and many other things to help set the mood.

Sett is extremely tall and very strong (I mean duh, pit fighter) and he loves pulling you into his lap for a make out session.

Praise kink, both giving and receiving. Loves telling you how good you are for him, how incredible you feel. And when you breathlessly tell him he feels perfect and beg him not to stop? That’s the shit he LIVES FOR. Absolutely loves the sounds you make. To likely no one’s surprise, I do think he has at least a little bit of a breeding kink.

Because he is a romantic, he likes to see your face. Loves watching your expression as he brings you bliss over and over and over again. (“Eyes on me, kitten. That’s it…you follow my directions so well, love…”) Also loves oral (giving). It’s one of his absolute favorite things in this world. Please PLEASE sit on his face, he loves it.

A KING of aftercare. Like Sett spoils you absolutely rotten. You don’t even have to lift a finger as he gently wipes you down with a warm wash cloth, carries you to a bubble bath where he cuddles and cleans you himself, and grabs you all the water and snacks that you need as soon as you’re cozy in bed again. He sets the bar SKY HIGH.

- Kayn

If you don’t think Kayn is very much on the dominant side, I don’t know what to tell you because have you SEEN HIM? The confidence. The energy. His SMIRK. This man is in full control and he KNOWS IT.

Will let you be in control every now and then when you request, but he’s definitely the main one who is in charge. And honestly he’s so good at his job that you’re very happy with your arrangement.

Loves buying you lingerie (so he can rip it off you later). If you surprise him by waiting in bed wearing just lingerie that he bought you, Kayn will go FERAL.

HICKEYS. This man is shameless when it comes to marking you. And he loves feeling you mark him, but of course because of his profession, you’re a bit more limited on where you can mark him. He needs to be able to cover them.

He is kinky as hell. Hair pulling, BDSM, edging, toys, and more. Dirty talk KING. Like I don’t think he’d shut up. Murmurs the filthiest shit in your ear. With your consent he’d also take photos and videos, but of course they’re on a completely separate phone that only you two know about/have access to (he takes it with him when he travels).

He’s an ass man so any position he can see your ass, he loves. Big fan of oral (both giving and receiving but more so receiving). “You look so fucking pretty on your knees for me, Angel…”

Of course Kayn’s not a jackass. If you need to go slower or need more romance he’s happy to give you that. He can be surprisingly gentle and sweet.

And if you ever do need to use it, the SECOND you use your safe word, he stops, murmuring gentle and sincere apologies and affirmations as he takes you through your aftercare routine. He knows he can be rough, since you’ve told him he’s allowed to be, but the very last thing he wants to do is hurt you or go beyond your limits. You’re truly precious to him.

I think he is secretly phenomenal at aftercare. Like you might not think so from looking at him, but he really goes the full nine yards. Warm bath or shower with him, changing into comfy pjs (or not, he leaves it up to you), a massage if you’re sore anywhere, hand feeding you a snack and helping you hydrate, and some damn good cuddles and pillow talk.

Kayn is an excellent dom who cares about your satisfaction and well being in and out of the bedroom.

Most

Thank you for reading! This was so fun to write. I'll be honest, I even managed to fluster myself! 😳😂 Maybe I’ll have to do like NSFW A-Z for each member. Here’s a small glimpse into my internal and external reactions as I was writing for each member!

Ezreal: *Smirking, giggling, kicking my feet* (He’s who inspired this entire post tbh.)

Aphelios: *Eyes widening in realization and blushing*

Yone: *Sighing and swooning*

K’Sante: *Biiiiiiiiiig smirk*

Sett: *Melts into a god damn puddle*

Kayn: *Screams into the void because HOLY SHIT??*

[chiefdirector]

Hiding | Tim Bradford | The Rookie

Act Two| Chapter 30 | Chapter 31 | Chapter 32 | Chapter 33

“Have a nice day off, did we?” the voice of Sergeant Caradine rang out from behind (Y/N), causing her to jump in her seat. Quickly, she whipped her head around to face her boss. “Didn't take you for a slacker, Bradford.”

“Please, I’m not a slack-”

Caradine rolled his eyes, “Don’t act like you don't have more coffee breaks than anyone else in this department. And don’t get me started on the amount of times I've caught you playing computer chess.”

(Y/N) guilty looked down at her lap, “So… you’ve come to fire me?”

“Not yet, if you were anyone else I would’ve. But despite your flaws, you're damn good at your job.” Cardaine looked like he wanted to smile, but fought the urge off. Slamming down a file on Bradford’s desk, he continued. “I got a case for you. Homicide. Lopez had already been briefed. You two are going to be partnered for the time being.”

“Cool-” 

Caradine cut (Y/N) off again. “What have I said about the word ‘cool?’”

“That it isn’t ‘cool’”

The sergeant just huffed, demanding that (Y/N)get out of his sight.

—

Lopez tried to keep her focus on the road, focussing on the case at hand even but she couldn’t help herself. Pulling up on a red light, she turned her head to her partner  “Bishop told me that you and Tim went on a date…”

“We’re married.” (Y/N) deadpanned.

“Still. Was it fun? Sexy even?”

“Why do you care, Ange. You're also in a committed relationship. Unless you have something to share?”

Angela lightly punched (Y/N) on the shoulder as she saw the lights turn green. Turning back to the road, she rolled her eyes. “It’s a little dry. He’s a lawyer, he doesn’t have any cool work stories to share. So spill.”

“He took me to where we had our first date.”

“Ooo. Let me guess! Romantic restaurant? Walk on the beach?  Wait no- it’s Tim. Football! He took you to see the football!”

“Shooting range.”  (Y/N) revealed, laughing at Angela’s insistence.

“Damn it!” Lopez groaned, pulling the car to park next to the sidewalk. “That’s not romantic.”

“It wasn’t too bad. But we’re here now, let's be a bit more professional.” (Y/N)  tried to reason as she looked across to Angela who had an eyebrow raised. “And I will tell you more later.”

“Good, let's go.” (Y/N) went to get out of the car before she realised where she was. It shocked her that she did not recognise the address in the file, but looking at the house, there was no way she could mistake it now. 

This was Kade Sullivan’s house.

“Do you know who died, was it the homeowner or…?” (Y/N) said, letting her voice trail off, the implications running through her mind.

“Yeah, the homeowner. Did you know them or something?”

(Y/N) hummed in acknowledgement before getting out of the car and towards the house. 

—-------

The patrol officers shot her strange looks as she made her way directly into the kitchen, (Y/N) had her mind only on one thing only. The bug that she had planted with Harper. Looking over her shoulder to make sure she wasn’t being followed, She ran her hand under the counter until she found the device. Quickly, she pocketed it before heading back out to the living room where the body lay.

Around the body, several patrol officers stood, waiting for the coroners. Most of the officers (Y/N) didn’t recognize. She had never bothered to learn most of their names, most people relocate before bonds were formed, but she clocked onto two standing in the corner immediately. 

“Chen, Bradford. Come here, I have a job for you.” She beckoned, waiting as the two came over. 

Quietly, she told Chen to come to her side, slipping the bug into her hand once she was close enough. “Take this back to the station, don’t stop for anything. Upload any data it may have that hasn’t been looked over and destroy it.”

“Destroy it? Doesn’t it need to be reported?” Chen asked, keeping her voice as low as (Y/N)’s.

“Yes, tell Grey. Don’t give any details. Once me and Lopez wrap up here, we will meet. Don’t tell Grey anything he doesn’t need to know.” She said, before turning to her husband. “You do the talking. I will be back soon. Let Harper know if you see her. And both of you, don’t say anything on the radio.”

(Y/N) walked further into the house as soon as she finished talking, not giving Bradford or Chen any room to argue.

“You heard her,” Tim said, looking at his boot as Lucy stood still, “Move!”

———————

After watching her partner examine the crime scene one to many times, Angela finally managed to drag her partner out of the house and back into the shop. 

They drove in silence for a bit, Angela deliberately taking the scenic route back to the precinct. Eventually the quietness got to her and she couldn’t hold back nah longer. “Are you okay?”

(Y/N) just hummed in response, looking out of the window to avoid Angela’s concerned look. 

“You know this isn’t the end of the world. We will be able to find another way to Dyer.” Angela didn’t need to say the name for (Y/N) to know who she was talking about. “It’ll work out.”

“I know… it’s just-” (Y/N) trailed off

“Just what?”

“It just feels real now. Seeing Sullivan dead… before, I knew the threat was there but I could ignore it. Other cases to work on, you know? But now, with him gone. Another pawn off the board.”

It was Angela’s turn to hum, processing her partner’s words. After a few moments, she spoke again. “This just means we’re one step closer to ending this.”

“But so is she.”

—————

It didn’t take long for the coroner's report to come back; the death was ruled as suspicious. No foul play, just a lonely man, too burdened by the world. Or by guilt. That was how he died but the real mystery came post-mortem. The call had been sent out as a homicide but all violent markings had been inflicted after death. As if someone was staging him. 

(Y/N) sighed as she ran her hand through her head. Looking down at the file, she reread the words over and over, as if she couldn’t fully comprehend them. There was something else that she was missing, something familiar.

Tags:

@xceafh @kmc1989 @buba424 @salty0cracker @iamasimpingh0e @malindacath @agentred27 @anaferreira-4 @starstruckchopshoptyphoon @alessiamargaux @rexit-mo @ladespedidas @omg-its-vixen @agentcable @rookietrek @fluentmoviequoter @wonderland2425 @niktwazny @the-dino-geek

[sanjisblackasswife]

So.... Hello! I'm not Very good at english since it's not my language but here we Go. I wanna to say i really love your art (from fanarts to your write style) and i Hope you have a good day today. Anyway i don't know If your ask are ope but How the Monsters trio Will react with they being your First in everthing! (Like First Kiss, First love, First s*x, etc) you can do nsfw-ish If you wanted

aww thank u!:) I am not going to go into grave detail because I am already doing a “First time” series with them but i like this request💓imma do it moreso where you’re THEIRS if thats alright

Being the Monster Trio’s First (NSFW-ish)

Black Fem Reader in Mind

CW: Mentions of sex

I am half sleep and typing this all in one go so mb for my spelling errors im just making up for lost time not posting consistently because school and coms☹️

Being Luffy’s First:

Crush: Being his crush is no different from being his best friend, he isn’t a very romantic guy if he likes you he will just tell you, “Y/N I think about you a lot, and I also think you may have a Lust DF power because when I think of you i get hard.” Bless him he is very blunt. BUT he does mean what he says so..be nice?

Kiss: Probably the most anticlimactic thing ever. Luffy already licks your face, hugs, and touches you a lot so when he starts running at you after a fight to see if you’re okay BAM. His lips smack into yours like a bowling ball and honestly. It’s cute. Completely uncoordinated, damn near sucked your bottom lip off, but…there was just something so addictive and attractive to his kiss that made you want more

Love: Very odd in his case. He just thought he liked you a lot. The signs were evident though, when you tell him he doesn’t deny it persay he moreso brushes it off because being in love is so new to him. However being his first love is something you can’t forget. He reminds you everyday why you’re important. Why he loves you. And why he fell in love with you.

Sexual Encounter: It was fun! You both were inexperienced. He didn’t know what hole to enter, you were shocked by how long he can stretch his dick. You both even spent the night laughing more than actually having sex, but once it came down to business it was a learning experience for you both. He was so attentive to make sure you were okay you felt yourself crying a little afterwards at how gentle he was with you.

Being Zoro’s First:

crush: He’s actually more of an asshole to you Not even on purpose he just doesn’t want to admit his feelings towards you. You’re beautiful, sweet, and charming and dammit he hates that he has feelings and how you always mess them up when you’re around him! He feels so powerless so please be gentle with him…or put him on blast. It maybe attractive to the mf.

Kiss: Awkward, awkward, awkward. He isn’t the rizzmaster okay. Yes he is pretty and he knows it but he is crap to flirting. absolutely crap. He was so hot in the face when you did the first move and kissed him he was a stuttering mess and pulled you back in for another kiss to prevent you from laughing at him. His kisses wasn’t BAD but …just practice with him. Yeah it was awkward but seeing your face so close and personal, smelling your scent. He couldn’t get enough.

Love: DENIAL IS A RIVER IN EGYPT Absolutely ridiculous how in denial he was. Everytime someone even said the word love he’d get so mad because that word applied to you in so many ways. He fell for you and he couldn’t do anything about it. You were the one opponent he could not beat and honestly, he didn’t want to. He fell for you and he fell so hard that it actually makes him nervous to be around you. He doesn’t know whether he loves you or hates you now for being so irresistible to him. Eventually he comes to terms with it and once it does and you feel the same way. Good luck getting rid of him.

Sexual Encounter: You taught him everything. He didn’t know his way from the clit to your ass. It took a lot of trial and error, sex wasn’t really NEW to him. He has seen porn but it’s completely different from films and pictures so sometimes he would back down when making out got too far, eventually he needed that release one late night while cuddling you and even though he could have went to the bathroom you stopped him and …helped him out. Let’s just say Zoro is so grateful he didn’t pussy out this go round!

Being Sanji’s First:

Crush: Sanji is an interesting guy because any woman that knows Sanji knows he is a mixture of a flirt and just having amazing manners for women. You however was just above the usual women he served to. Being his crush was an experience because you seen a side to Sanji most women don’t get to see. You seen him stand up straighter, sly comments that made your heart melt, and even kept his cool…too cool in fact. He really was Mr. Prince for you.

Kiss: The first kiss he planned it out. He knew his feelings about you and that you felt the same so he needed to plan it just right not just for him, but for you as well. The kiss was so soft and delicate you almost didn’t feel it. And that was because he shy’ed away for a moment, scared his sudden bold move would have you smack him, Luckily, he didn’t have to worry feeling your hands cup his cheek to kiss him back. He still touches his lips when he thinks about that time you kissed him.

Love: I mean man…you really are a blessed woman because out of all of the others he has seen and been with he chose you and only you. it’s insane really. He tries in his entire will to not mess this opportunity to find true love up. You being his first love he watches his mouth and actions around you more, He tries his hardest not to ruin the view you have of him and it shows. If you can just reassure him you love him for him and not who he thinks he needs to be. Sanji needs the confirmation that you love him almost as much as he loves you.

Sexual Encounter: LORD—- okay. okay. Just like Zoro trial and error HOWEVER. Much longer and worse. He really is still a pervert no matter how much in love he is with you so you have to take it very slow. Once you both are okay to be naked in front of each other he is back to being a shy boy so you constantly kiss and praise him, telling him how good he is for you, how well he is doing for his first time. You were so kind and patient with him, it never fails to leave a chill down his spine (in a good way) when he remembers that night of love making with you, and now that he has more experience he does nothing but reciprocate the same feelings back to you in bed.

[jjunieworld]

32. just ask and i’ll show you ⸝ ˚⋆ 

↳ mostly written, some texts. word count: 2.9k

please read the author’s note at the bottom!!!

warnings: this chapter is basically smut lmao. kinda soft??, unprotected sex (stares), marking, kinda switch!soobin and switch!reader(?) idk there isn’t really sub/dom dynamics, fingering, petnames (baby), creampie, cockwarming, aftercare

the whole car ride over to soobin’s—yes, he finally did get a new car—you had to convince him the entire time that you did want to date again. “soobin, we are literally driving over to your place to have sex… are you kidding me?” you laughed. your face was extremely flushed with the whole conversation and you’re sure that if soobin’s eyes weren’t on the road he would comment on it.

soobin’s eyes glanced over at you briefly at the same time he as pushed his glasses up his nose bridge. “i’m just making sure! we’ve only hung out a couple times since the whole sunghoon thing, and now we’re about to get down and dirty!” he smiled, chuckling. you scrunched up your face a little, “do not say down and dirty… and i wouldn’t have called you my boyfriend if i didn’t want to date—“ you whipped towards him, “—do you not want to be my boyfriend?”

soobin scoffed playfully as if offended as he glanced over at you again, “are you kidding me? no like seriously…” you giggled and leaned your head against the passenger’s seat as you looked at him. “then that’s settled! we’re boyfriend-girlfriend!” you exclaimed. soobin shook his head slightly and laughed, “good, because i can park the car and we can go right here, right now—again—if there’s still any confusion.”

you pushed his shoulder lightly, letting out a loud gasp. “you’re nasty! why would you bring that up!” you hid your burning face with your hands and looked away towards the passenger’s side window. soobin’s laugh grew, “i’m just saying! you didn’t believe then, and that was after we already had sex. in the bed, in the shower, in the car… just ask and i’ll show—“

“stop!” you yelled and the car was filled with laughter. “i get it, i get it!” embarrassment—and something else that you won’t name—filled you. “just drive the damn car!” you added.

as soobin unlocked his door you were anxious with anticipation. were you two moving too fast? you haven’t even kissed yet! soobin pushed the door open and turned to you, grabbing your hands. “we don’t have to do this if you’re not ready,” soobin said seriously. you stepped inside, him behind you.

you were ready, it’s felt like a lifetime without him and you didn’t want to wait another second. turning to him, you said, “i want to. i’m ready.” soobin shut and locked the door. he then took your hands in his again, a wide smile on his face. “i missed you so much!”

he started walking backwards, you following. giggling, you replied, “you did?” soobin nodded, laughing lightly. he looked at you like you had just asked him the silliest, most obvious question ever. “i did!” he replied. you didn’t realize that he was leading you to his bedroom until he opened the door while still looking at you. “and i missed taking your clothes off, too!”

“oh!” you laughed, holding a hand to your mouth as he pulled you inside and shut the door. “how romantic…” you teased. soobin chuckled and pulled you into a kiss, his fingers going under your shirt to hold your bare waist.

he pulled away and grabbed your hand, pressing his lips to your fingertips. “we can just talk and hang out if you’re not ready,” soobin spoke softly. you just gave him a look, “i’m ready!” before he could ask you again you started to take off your clothes until you were left in just your matching black bra and underwear.

soobin’s eyes widened at you as his eyes shamelessly looked you up and down. his hands hovered at the sides of your waist where they were before. you raised your eyebrows at him. as if a lightbulb turned on in his head, he blinked a couple times and then jumped into action. quickly pulling off the white flowy button up he was wearing, soobin’s lips were on yours in an instant.

his hands traveled your body as he backed you up towards the bed. when the back of your knees hit the bed, your lips pulled from his as you forcibly sat down. you looked up at him and he stared down at you with wide eyes. “fuck…” soobin muttered and he pulled his pants down. your eyes trailed down his body and to his huge bulge that looked like he was gonna rip his boxers.

you pull your panties off and move backwards on the bed, watching as he took his boxers off and his cock sprung out in full glory. soobin crawls towards you on the bed, capturing your lips in a sweet kiss before pulling away and moving down. “no…” you breath and he looks up at you from between your thighs, confused. “i need you… not your mouth,” you add shyly. you’ve been dripping with need since he had picked you up from your dorm room.

soobin lifted his head and tried to hide his smirk. he pressed soft kisses to your skin as he made his way back up your body, stopping at the band of your bra. “can you take this off for me?” soobin asks in a low voice and looks at you. your whole body felt on fire as you nodded. soobin pulled away for you to sit up.

you reached behind you for the clasp, soobin’s eyes never leaving yours, and undid it. tossing the bra to the floor with the rest of your clothes, the two of you were now completely naked. you felt the heat of soobin’s stare over your body and squirmed under him slightly. pulling his head towards yours, your lips met his to try and smooth some of the awkwardness.

soobin’s hard cock kept brushing against your stomach, making you whine lowly. “soobin…” you whimpered and pulled away. his lips were on your neck then, sucking pretty marks onto them. “let me get you ready, baby,” he said, his hand trailing down your stomach. you moaned at his touch, arms wrapping around his neck and face burying deep into it.

his thumb rubbed circles into your clit as he moved to press his lips on yours, seemingly satisfied with his work on your neck. you moaned against his lips at the sensation and soobin took the chance to slip his tongue into your mouth. he deepened the kiss, his tongue dancing with yours.

when you started to roll your hips up, whimpering into his mouth, he pushed two fingers into you with a smile on his lips. you couldn’t help the lewd moan that came out of you as he pumped them in and out of you. you threw your head back onto the pillow with your eyebrows knitted together in pleasure. “fuck… that feels so good,” you murmured.

soobin continued, humming as he kissed and marked your breasts. you felt the knot in the pit of your stomach tightened and moaned out, “i-i’m gonna cum…” soobin pulled his fingers out of you and you whined at the loss. he shushed you lightly, lips pecking yours, “i wanna feel you.”

looking down, soobin lined the tip of his hard cock with your entrance. he started to slide it inside you, watching your face for any discomfort. once he bottomed out, he stayed like that—unmoving, for a moment to let you adjust. “i really did miss you,” soobin whispered, brushing his nose with yours.

giving him a kiss, all you could do was chuckle lightly. you were too distracted with how fucking badly you needed him to start moving. too distracted with the feeling of him inside you again. running your fingers through his hair, you said, “if you d-don’t start moving, you’re gonna start missing me again.”

laughing as your motion pulled his head back slightly, glasses falling down on his nose bridge, his hips started to roll into your lightly. breath hitching, you shuddered out an exhale as your eyes squeezed shut. you wrapped your legs around his hips tightly.

soobin’s head fell into the crook of your next, heavy breathing and whimpers coming from his mouth as he thrusted faster. you let out a moan as your fingernails dug into soobin’s back. at this moment, you couldn’t even feel bad at it. all you could think about was how soobin’s cock was ramming in and out of you and how good it felt.

that familiar knot tightened and so did your grib on soobin. you whimpered out, not able to speak as your walls clenched around his thickness. soobin moaned at the feeling, bringing his lips down on yours into a sloppy kiss. “i’m so close, baby…” he whimpered. “cum for me… cum on my cock, baby.”

his thrusting didn’t stop. the tip of his cock hit perfectly against your sweet spot, making your eyes roll back slightly and squeeze shut. he was just so big. soobin’s hand came down to your breast, stimulating your perked nipple. you moaned loudly as you squirmed under him, you couldn’t take anymore.

whimpering against soobin’s shoulder, your sweet release covered his cock in creamy white. soobin threw his head back in a moan. “y/n…” he whimpered. you could fell his cock twitch as your walls clenched more around him. a moment later, warmth pooled inside you as soobin filled you up even more. “f-fuck…” he whined lowly, pressing his forehead to your as his eyes squeezed shut.

after a couple moments of laying like that, and of catching your breaths, you started to squirm again. grinding your hip up slightly, you pressed kisses to soobin’s cheek. “want more?” soobin asked, a little breathy, and you nodded.

he flipped the two of you over so that you were now straddling him. cum dropped out of you and onto soobin’s lower stomach. soobin gripped your hips and started moving them back and forth, “ride me, baby.” you pressed the palms of your hands onto his stomach as you began rolling your hips back and forth, eyebrows furrowed and moans on your lips from how sensitive you were.

you moved faster, stomach tightening as you looked down at him, “b-binnie, it feels so g-good…” your thighs were burning, but you didn’t care. soobin’s hands were aiding you and you were sure you were gonna have bruises at your hips from how hard his fingertips were pressing into your skin. “mmm, k-keep going,” soobin whimpered out, a moan following. he stared up at you through hooded eyes, glasses slid down his nose, and his mouth open. “keep going, baby.”

you fell down onto his chest when you began to clench around him again. soobin wrapped his arms around your waist tightly, his hand rubbing circles into your back as he started thrusting upwards. “you did good, baby. let me help you,” he whispered huskily in your ear between moans. not a moment later, you felt yourself cumming around him again with trembling thighs.

“f-fuck, y/n…” he whispered in a low voice. his hands moved to hold your hips, keeping your body steady as he slid in and out of you. filthy sounds filled the room and a moment later soobin’s thrusts faltered slightly as he came inside you again. soobin slid you back down onto his cock and wrapped his arms around you, nuzzling his face into your neck and pressing a kiss that made you shudder to it. he rubbed soothing circles onto your back.

“thank you, binnie. that was amazing,” you said once your heavy breathing resided. you turned to look at his side profile. “there’s no need to thank me, but it was amazing. better than the first time,” soobin replied and you giggled. “first three times,” he added cheekily and you sat up slightly. “what did i say earlier!” you exclaimed as your face heated.

he laughed, the sound vibrating your body and making you bite your lip. “what! it was three times. i’m just clarifying!” he laughed harder once you slapped his shoulder lightly. you laid back down on his chest and tried not to think about the fact that he was still inside you.

soobin was playing with the tips of your hair, when he said softly, “i’m sorry about the whole sunghoon thing again… i don’t know, i guess i was just blinded by everything. i really thought i was about to lose you.” a smile spread over your face and the two of your hearts beat in sync. “it was never gonna be him. it will always be you, soobin,” you stated. you watched as the smile formed on his face, yours growing with it.

“you know, the night of your birthday… when nobody could find you until taehyun did… i know you didn’t want to see me, so i made him go out and search the streets for you. i was a complete mess, but i was so relieved when he found you,” soobin breathed, his eyes closing like he revisiting the feelings. “he said he was letting you sleep in his dorm since you didn’t want to go back to yours and i just had to see you. had to make sure you were alive. you were asleep when i got there, but i just couldn’t leave you alone… not after what just happened…”

soobin opened his eyes and stared at the ceiling, avoiding your gaze. “i just sat there, head laying on the table, watching you, making sure you were breathing. the entire night. i couldn’t even sleep, could barely blink. just stayed like that until morning. taehyun said i had to be gone before morning cause he didn’t want you to wake up pissed, but i stayed longer anyways. until i saw you start to stir.”

if you thought back on it, very very vaguely you could remember warmth on your forehead and the sound of the door closing softly. soobin pulled away slightly so he could look at you. “i even wrote you a note for you to take the medicine i left out that i made look like it was from taehyun and forced myself to leave. i’m really really sorry, y/nie. words will never be able to express how sorry i am.” you pressed your lips to his softly as you cupped his cheek.

“i forgive you, i already told you that. it’s okay,” you spoke. you thought back to the morning after your birthday. soobin wrote the note? your mind conjoured the image and you almost wanted to laugh at how you didn’t even realize that it was his handwriting. your heart warmed at the fact that he watched over you that night, even if past you would’ve been pissed about it. “i know,” soobin said, forehead pressing to yours. “i just needed to tell you.”

soobin sat the two of you up, you letting out a gasp and him a small moan as the both of you realized that he was still inside of you. steadying yourself, you looked down as you began to slide off of him, the sticky cum between the two of you spreading. soobin’s eyes were squeezed together when you looked at him, mouth pressed together tightly. you had to stifle your own moans.

once soobin was completely out of you—and your fingers were no longer digging into his shoulders and his your hips—he took you to his bathroom so the two of you could shower together. soobin gave you his clothes to wear and the two of you were on his couch, cuddled up next to each other as a movie played on the tv that the two of you weren’t watching.

you were giggling as he told you about all of his tweets he made when the two of you were apart that he made. “it was really bad…” soobin trailed. “and to make it worse, i went to the beach to think of you and you were actually there! i thought i was imagining things so i was just staring at you for like ten minutes straight trying to figure out if you were real or not.” you laughed at that and pressed your lips to his smiling ones.

“so that was the eyes i was feeling on me!” you exclaimed and soobin nodded while chuckling. “yeah… and then i was like ‘no… now this is getting creepy’ so i left. but i did get a picture of you!” soobin pulled out his phone to show you and your laugh grew louder. “oh my god, you stalker!” you said teasingly and then rested your head on his shoulder. “i’m happy you were there for me during my bad moments… even if i didn’t know it,” you smiled at him.

soobin kissed your forehead, “always. i’ll always be there. i love you, y/nie. you already have my heart.” you giggled a little. “i love you too, and you know you already have mine.” and in the setting sunlight, your hearts called out to each other in sync.

masterlist.

summary: choi soobin has always been the popular kid surrounded by his popular friends. y/n… not so much. one night, soobin and his friends make bet that soobin can’t get y/n to date him in a month. unfortunately for y/n, they’re a hopeless romantic.

A/N: there’s only 3 more chapters left (besides the two bonus chapters i have planned)!!! so if any of you want some bonus drabbles send in an ask!! thank you all so much for enjoying this smau thus far, i’m really happy you’ve all liked it! ♡

taglist: @jjunberry @gothgyuu @spooksh0wbabe @beargyuuzz @carengene @binluvsu @seunnimg @vixensss @kittyhyuka @beomsite @hueningm1ckey @n034sy @littlestxli @starsforbeomgyu @soobiary @bunnisoobin @heiiolifeee @cryingforgyu @dani-is-tired @damn-u-min-yoongi @soobieboobiedoobiedaboobie @icouldntcareless22 @sleepdeprivedline @jhuuni @thepoopdokyeomtouched @rikizm @curiousgworge @nakaopolo @mwahvvis @cupidsmoons @soobhns @ryunjin0 @punkhazardlaw @phtogravi @choibeomkai @soobiverse @rapmonie2047 @riaawr (if your name is bold it wouldn’t let me tag you!)

— kipo &lt;3

[devillime]

Okay I need to know why solmare is making some “choices” that aren’t good? But also a redo of an old post

Like first off.

Luke

Why the hell does my little boy have a body pillow like my wife?

Solmare themselves had came out and said he’s TEN yet do shit like this it’s not even funny it’s fucking disgusting that these are OFFICIAL MERCH FROM THEM

Like they could have been creative and made him something different like this

It’s not hard just give him a chihuahua pillow with a removable hat it’s not that hard

Secondly

THIS

I understand if new players haven’t played the original game but why put this here? Not to mention people can have their mcs act different in NB vs SWD like think of it like this let’s say mc forgot all their memories with the brothers completely but as they get closer to them it shows flashbacks from events that happened in the old game that way this wouldn’t be needed

And thirdly

The empty world building

Like don’t get me wrong we know a shit ton of things from devildom yet why have the world be so damn empty?? Like come on

Twisted Wonderland came out in 2020 now sure you can say that “it’s Disney they’ll have more people to help out” then what about arcana twilight?

That game out in 2023 and yes i seen a LOT of similarities between arcana twilight and obey me but they changed it mid way through the game i understand if people were upset about it but why harass them when they don’t sexualize a child as what Solmare is doing to Luke

I get not wanting to your favorite game get plagiarize but it’s just dumb especially when arcana twilight does what obey me is doing with their mc in that

Both mcs don’t have a body sprite

Your mc can be any way you want it to be

Both are non binary

Both have actual ties to the characters that beyond just romantic relationships

I get not wanting a game that is just a copy of another game but once you get deeper into arcana twilight and get closer to floor 13 it’s get better and more interesting but well never know that since the creators pretty much abandoned the game due to the harassment hell judging from my research arcana twilight is the only game were they have were the mc is non binary

Hell Storytaco has a game just like obey me with demons and all but it’s pay to play while arcana twilight isn’t as bad with getting gems

Now

THESE THREE

Now as of right now we all tomorrow at 6pm pdt for when season three of Nightbringer starts

HOWEVER

These three need to show up more than just one time then dip yes they are in events but why have them only show up in events and not the main story

Raphael in Nightbringer is a different story since he’s in the celestial realm but thirteen and Mephistopheles? There’s no excuse like come both of them are in devildom we can met with them and see them more why have it where they pop up once then fall of the face of the earth?

Why show three new characters if your not gonna give us anything much less have us interact with them less and less yes I get that obey me is center about the brothers but also us as the mc

Our interaction with the characters and our relationship with them while i can’t come up with something for thirteen but with Mephistopheles and Raphael there things there that need to be addressed

How does Raphael feel about knowing Simeon is no longer gonna be an angel like him?

His relationship with Michael after the brothers had fallen?

Is Raphael afraid to scared to get close to us because of Simeon and is he afraid that Luke will have to wake two people he cherish them most slowly die in front of him as he gets older?

What’s his opinion on diavolo?

These have been what circulating in my head. Now on to Mephistopheles oh boy I love Lucifer but not delusional enough to ignore what his prescience in devildom had done to Mephistopheles livelihood

How did his family react when they found out that Diavolo chose Lucifer over him?

Does diavolo know the pain he have caused choosing Lucifer?

What is life plan now knowing what he was raised to do was tossed out the window?

Is diavolo ever gonna address that issue and try and resolve it peacefully or is he gonna keep things how it is even if it could cause problems later on?

Will we ever know how Diavolo sees things with Mephistopheles and how he’s going to deal with that?

Do the brothers know why Mephistopheles is rightfully upset with Lucifer?

Are they never going get this resolved with these characters? Like it same with the other side characters we have so much insight about how they are and what they went through but at the same time we don’t it’s really jarring.

[glisten-inthedark]

The way Mike says “I say it,” during his argument with El about how he doesn’t say ily is very intriguing to me. He says it with so much….gravity? Solemness? Almost….somberness?? It’s so hard to pinpoint but there’s no warmth in his eyes and it almost feels like a mantra, and he does this little nod at the end of it like he’s telling himself, “Yep, that’s right, I do say it.” He says it like saying it will end the conversation. But it doesn’t.

I agree with other analyses that say he’s trying to gaslight himself in this scene too because what an odd delivery.

Also, have we ever really broken down why this entire scene proves that him not saying I love you isn’t born out of insecurity or, like he later claims, saying it would make El realize he’s just a loser soon? Because for one thing, it’s not like this is something that is disappointing El but she’s keeping it to herself and only confiding it in others. She makes it so damn clear that she wants Mike to say it, that it’s reached the point where she doesn’t think he loves her romantically anymore—if he loves her romantically but is insecure, then El confronting him on not saying it to her should actually make him feel more secure because it’s confirmation that she wants me to love her romantically. And it’s also showing him that he’d actually lose her faster by not saying it than by saying it so what the hell does he have to lose?

But more importantly, Mike insists that he does tell her he loves her.

So how the fuck would that work, Wheeler?? You’re afraid of saying the words I love you to her because you think you’ll lose her faster if you do but also you insist that you do say it?? So if you want El to believe that you do tell her you love her even though apparently her being told by you that you love her would facilitate you losing her??????

Bullshit, Michael Wheeler!

And I think you were the one who pointed out that Mike doesn’t say, “You know how I feel about you,” but rather, “You know what I think of you.” which is like, such a huge Freudian slip imo, especially because he then goes on to say only 2 things about her: she’s the most incredible person in the world, and she’s a superhero.

Nothing about how he feels about her. Just what he thinks of her as. And guess who also calls El a superhero? Her other friends. Mike says two things about El in this scene that literally anyone else in their party would. Compared to Will’s van confession where he talks about how Mike makes him feel—like he’s better for being different, like he’s not a mistake, and gives him the courage to keep going. That’s fucking romantic love right there.

Lastly I want to praise Finn Wolfhard for his microexpressions during that entire argument because I rewatched it over and over for this comment to try and find words to describe how he delivers that one line, but damn after El says, “You can’t even write it,” he has the most fleeting microexpression of panic that is honestly so impressive—it’s this eye twitch/muscle flex by his right eye and this tiny little flinch forward, it almost looks like the right side of his face minutely trembles, A+ acting right there👏👏👏

Hello!

First of all I'm hella sick and I just took some medicine so if I don't make any sense you can blame it on that lmao.

First of all, I just rewatched the scene to see if I could pick it up and my diseased riddled brain did notice what you're talking about. Firstly, he says with such certainty that you'd almost believe it if it weren't for the fact we saw how he signed his letters to El.

And secondly, is almost as if he's trying to convince himself and her that he does say it, probably because as you said, he expected this to end the conversation.

And see, it bothers me so much that people (the GA) don't notice the inconsistency in Mike's behavior because had not one, but two moments that should tell him exactly what he claims he needs to hear. The first is when El tells him point blank that she loves him too, and the second is this one.

Like, what sense does it make that he says he doesn't say the one thing he knows she wants him to say because he's afraid that it'll hurt if he loses her, but him not saying is clearly what's hurting her therefore might be the thing that can make him lose her, so WHY DON'T YOU SAY IT, MICHAEL?

And it's like you said, he says be does say it like he believes it, like he thinks he does which opens another Pandora box, because is like you said, he's telling El he says he loved and then turns around and says he didn't say it because he's afraid to lose her so WHICH IS IT? Can't be fucking both.

And yup, I'm the one who said that about him saying what he thinks of her and not what he feels.

He never says he likes her or anything remotely singular to her personality, is just about the things he thinks she can do which I still insist connects to her he associates El with physical and emotional security that he lacks.

But yes, he never said what she really needed to her, he said the opposite as a matter of fact.

I hope this made sense lmao

[one-britt-to-rule-them-all]

Being marked by Satan

Character: Satan

Genre: NSFW

CW: | Fem!Reader | Consesual rough sex | Dacryphilia | Biting/Scratching | Marking | Slight manhandling | Slight blood |

Format: Drabble

Word Count: 1.1K

NOTICE: This drabble kinda references my headcanons regarding the demon brothers' anatomy. So, if you haven't checked those out, you might want to at least check Satan's part. It's not mandatory, though, so don't feel obligated.

NSFW content below.

“I’m going to ruin you.”

That’s what Satan had told you, tone as calm and collected as ever, and you believed him – you truly did. Only Satan could say such things while maintaining a front of utmost nonchalance, and perhaps that’s the very factor that had the alarm bells blaring in your head.

A romantic at heart, Satan made love, especially when it came to you – the sweet human exchange student who had stolen his heart. But Satan remained a demon, and demons had strong urges – urges to mark and possess. So yes, you believed him when he said he’d ruin you.

You've never truly experienced the Avatar of Wrath in bed yet, but the moment he spoke those words after having caught far too much of Lucifer's scent on you for his liking, you knew that you would be crawling out of his room, body worn out and used.

Lifting your head, you could see the stains of tears and smudged mascara on the fabric beneath you. You most likely looked like a mess: runny mascara accompanying your tears from the myriad of overwhelming sensations you were receiving.

“S-Satan… please…! I-“ your words get cut off by a loud, broken moan as Satan mercilessly rammed his cock deep into your aching pussy. “C-Can’t… anymore!”

“Nonsense, darling. You’re perfectly capable of handling this.” Satan says, almost perfectly collected; only the slight breathlessness in his tone betrayed his true feelings.

Could you even orgasm anymore? With the size of the puddle of your cum that stained the sheets, you’d be surprised if you had any more left in you, but Satan was far from done with you. You’d severely misjudged his stamina – his restraint. Because you knew damn well he, too, wanted nothing more than to paint your walls white.

Your head flopped back down onto the mattress, and as you lay completely face down and on your stomach, you were at Satan’s complete mercy. You bit down on the sheets, your fists clenching onto the blankets with a white-knuckle grip in an attempt to ground yourself, but there was no way to keep your mind coherent with the unforgiving pace Satan had set.

“Then again, love, you know what to say if you want to stop.” Satan starts, gripping your hair to lift your head off the bed. Lowering his mouth to your ear, he whispered to you: “But I don’t quite think that you want to stop. Isn’t that right, kitten?”

His taunting words were accentuated by slow, but deep and rough thrusts, the thick knot at the base of his cock getting pushed deeper and deeper into your core. Your breath was completely taken away, eyes rolling at the back of your head as you looked nothing short of pathetic.

“N-No…”

“That’s what I thought. Such an insatiable little human,” Satan chuckled, gripping your chin to turn your head so that he could press a quick kiss to your tear-stained cheek. “How precious. Truly.”

Satan then pressed his nose against the back of your neck, and to his displeasure, he could still pick up a faint trace of Lucifer’s scent, making the Avatar of Wrath growl in an animalistic manner. He couldn’t have that. No way in hell.

You inhaled sharply as you felt Satan’s tongue soothe your skin, only to yelp loudly as he suddenly sank his fangs into your neck, quietly snarling. The sudden, combined pain and pleasure had you balling your hand into a fist, hitting the mattress.

Though you wouldn’t have free rein over your hands much longer. Satan grabbed a hold of both your wrists, pinning them above your head. With his mouth still latched to your neck, Satan nearly laid his full weight on your back as he fucked you.

“F-Fuck…! S-Satan…!” You moaned loudly, voice hoarse from the wear of your screaming.

Bottoming out, hitting and nearly bruising your cervix, the ripples at the underside of Satan’s cock had you a mess, the texture perfectly sliding against your most sensitive areas. 

Satan’s room was filled with growling and screaming, accompanied by the unmistakable, lewd noises of skin slapping against skin and the rattling of the bed against the wall. You’d be willing to bet that any of Satan’s brothers would be ready to barge in and tell the two of you to shut the fuck up.

And when Satan finally let go of your neck, he assessed the damage, his pace never faltering as he felt pride swell in his chest as he took in the raw, red bite mark decorating your neck. Little specks of blood could be seen, which he promptly cleaned up with his tongue, sending a multitude of shivers down your spine.

“Perfect,” he chuckled. “Now, perhaps my idiotic brothers will think twice about rubbing their scent all over you.”

Satan sat back up, lifting his weight off of your back. Still gripping your wrists, he held your arms behind your back with one hand, claws digging into your skin, his free hand serving to press your face into the sheets.

And you, poor little thing on the receiving end of the brunt of Satan’s wrath, could only pathetically moan between sobs. Were you crying because of overstimulation? Of the pain of Satan’s claws digging into you and the burn of the fresh bite mark on your neck? You didn’t know, but what you did know, was that the way Satan’s hips snapped against your ass, cock filling you up so sinfully good, there was no way in hell you’d have him stop. Not until he filled you up to the brim and covered your body in pretty, red streaks.

And when Satan’s sharp claws slid down your back, your whole body shivered, the sensation going straight between your legs. His claws didn’t dig deep enough to leave noticeable marks, but you could imagine the little white lines being left in their wake, teasing the possibility of what could be.

“Hah… you gave me a nice little squeeze there, Kitten,” Satan groaned, his pace never faltering. “Tell me, do you like the feeling of my claws on your skin?”

“M-Mhm…!” You managed.

“Oh, well, why didn’t you say so? Well, if it’s a demon’s claws that you want, then a demon’s claws are what you're going to get, love,” Satan said in a dark tone. 

And then you felt them – his claws – slowly but surely digging deeper into your back, promising to paint you with the pretty marks you so desperately wanted. You provoked a demon lord, and so ask, and you shall receive.

“I’m going to ruin you, love.”

[spideysquake]

“good answer” - p.p

summary: peter is scared to love as much as he does, but sometimes you have to do the thing that scares you. [i got the idea/inspiration from ‘banyan tree – interlude’ by machine gun kelly, even though that guy kinda sucks and his music is generally pretty mid]

word count: 1k words

warnings: cursing, i genuinely cannot tell if this is angst or fluff and i’m okay with that, this can be imagined as any iteration of peter bc i know everyone has their favorites

a song on the side: banyan tree – interlude by machine gun kelly

“You know, I would do pretty much anything for you.”

You were sprawled out on Peter’s dark blue comforter, your head resting against his thigh and your feet dangling off the edge of the bed. The sky was beautiful and gloomy and there was a good chance that it was going to rain – the kind of rain that makes you want to light a candle and dig out the heavy blankets from the back of your closet. It had been about twenty minutes since either of you had said anything – Peter had been almost positive you were asleep until your words broke the silence in his tiny, dusty apartment.

“What do you mean?” Everything you did was vital to Peter. Everything you loved, he wanted to love. Everything you craved, he wanted to give you. Everything you thought and felt and said, he wanted to know and hear and understand. The day would never come when he felt he was too close to you or knew you too well. To know you was to love you, and he was content to spend the rest of his life doing both.

“I mean it. I would do just about anything for you,” you hummed, though you refused to make direct eye contact with your boyfriend. Instead, you traced your fingertip over the set of initials you had inked in Sharpie over the hollow point of his wrist, where the soft skin met the jutting tendon – your initials on his wrist, and his on yours. “Anything you want me to do, I’ll do. Anything you want from me, it’s yours. I’m yours.”

It was the most romantic and terrifying thing Peter had ever heard. If he was just another broke, anxious twenty-something college student, your words would be the greatest thing he’s ever heard. But he’s Spider-Man. And being Spider-Man means constantly putting the people he loves in harm’s way. As long as he had these powers, as long as he used his abilities, you were never really safe. Peter hated that he was putting you in danger, but he couldn’t let you go. He had lost too much. For once in his life, he wanted to be selfish. And he wanted you more than anything.

“I don’t want that, though.” Peter felt like his body was on fire. Whether it was from love or fear, he wasn’t sure. Was there really much of a difference? “I want you to be you. To be free. Don’t just do things for me.” His desperation was clawing at the inside of his chest like he was holding it captive. He was damn sure going to try.

“No, I know.” You were sitting up now. “But that’s what I mean. Like, doing things for you isn’t just doing things for you, you know? It’s also doing things for me. They aren’t really different anymore. Making you happy makes me happy.” You threaded your hand through his overgrown curls, your thumb smoothing back and forth over his freckled cheek. His ears were hidden under small tufts of untamed locks, but he could still feel the tips of them heating up as you gazed lovingly as him. Suddenly, he was overcome by his need to be holding you, to hold your head to his heart and to feel the comfort that came with knowing that you were real, and you were with him, and you weren’t going anywhere.

“What makes me happy is knowing that you’re safe, that you’re on the other side of the phone, waiting to pick up when I call you. What makes me happy is knowing that you are going to live a long and happy and fulfilling life, and that you get to wake up every morning and know that you are loved.” Peter buried his chin into your hair, which he noticed smelled like his minty conditioner. There was a weight behind his eyes, but he refused to cry when the conversation began with an admission of your love. “Even if that means it isn’t with me.”

“Baby, that’s not… That stuff only matters if it’s with you. I don’t want any of that otherwise. I only want a long and happy life if I’m waking up to you every morning. Without you, it’s not a happy life. I’m happy with you.”

Peter was scared. If he’d learned anything in this life, it was that bad things happened to people who loved Peter Parker. He couldn’t be your downfall.

“But Spider-Man… What if you — What if I do something? What if someone bad finds me, or finds out who you are to me? What if I’m the reason you —”

You wiped at Peter’s tear-stained cheeks with your fleecy sleeves, and you pressed your forehead to his – so close that you could the smell the peppermint tea he’d been drinking when you first laid down together.

“Pete, baby… We can’t control any of that shit. Yeah, bad shit is going to happen. And yeah, maybe some of it will happen because you’re Spider-Man. But even if you weren’t, bad things would happen. That’s life, honey. But we can’t run away from the good things because they could end one day. I would rather die knowing that we loved each other as much and as hard as possible than live forever wondering if there was ever something I didn’t say, or a kiss I didn’t give you. If I die knowing exactly what it felt like to love and be loved by Peter Parker, then I did it right.” You pressed your lips to Peter’s forehead, and he wondered what he could’ve possibly done to earn you.

All he could think was that he would spend the rest of his life earning this moment: your hand in his hair, your scent in his sheets, your warm breath against his cheeks, and your heartbeat lined up right next to his in your chests.

His throat felt thick and his voice felt heavy, but he couldn’t let such wonderful words go unanswered.

“And just when did you get so wise about matters of the heart?” Your noses brush and it’s the most glorious millisecond of his life.

“It comes with the territory of being so hopelessly in love with the best guy I’ve ever known.” You beam up at him like you hold the secrets to the universe under your tongue, and it’s all he can do not to go searching for them.

What a wonderful answer.

[enb-y]

↬ ROTTMNT BOYS FINDING OUT THAT READER OWNS A KITTEN

rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles.

request: ❝ hello, can i request headcanons where the rise turtles react to the reader having a pet kitten? platonic or romantic, i don't mind, and gender neutral pronouns please ^^ ❞ — anonymous.

warnings: mentions of ticks, deworming, ringworm, fleas, mild swearing, unedited. could be read as platonic or romantic.

characters: raphael, leonardo, donatello, michelangelo.

writers note: cats, my all time favorite menace. I actually have one— well, that felon is my sisters, but I take care of her like she’s my damn cat. (sigh, I miss my cat 😔)

readers pronouns are not mentioned nor included.

*◌ೃ࿔ ┆RAPHAEL.

✶ raphael, the one who adores animals of all creatures. although, some of them don’t even like him half the time. most likely do to fear, or simply he’s not their kind of guy. raph is quite the scary and intimidating guy, yet he’s a major softy inside that scary shell. so, the first thing he does is try to smother the kitten, okay not too literally. however, in a more mature manner, he does try to help you with the kitten, especially if you just got it.

✶ raph will help you bathe the kitten if you find it off the streets. he highly recommends you to take it to the vet to see if it has any major issues, and he’ll definitely help you find the siblings and mother, that’s only if it’s not abandoned.

✶ he's really gentle with the kitten, especially knowing his size and strength. the kitten is smaller than his damn hands. he loves animals, he thinks he’s some kind of animal whisperer, snow white headass. let’s not forget to de-flea it, he will not help you pluck you out the ticks. he’s afraid of doing something wrong and the bug's head getting stuck inside the poor animal's skin.

✶ he’s fine with helping you remove the flea’s from its fur and putting medicine on it, but he will never pluck goddamn ticks from it. he does not fuck with them. and knowing that they also suck on anything that has blood? he’s good, he’ll have nightmares though.

*◌ೃ࿔ ┆LEONARDO.

✶ leonardo thinks kittens are cute. but he’ll only like them if they feel the same way about him. he’ll most likely back off if he sees or hears a cat hissing. he does not fuck with grumpy ass felines, sure they’re cute, but he does not care. leo likes kittens and he would like to have one, yet he can’t, because all the kittens and cats that he and brother brought home all tried to have their dad as their meal. which, of course, got them gradually kicked out of the sewers.

✶ leonardo definitely tries to help you with your animal, especially if it’s a stray. he’s had his fair shares of beef with stray animals and he’s won every single battle. (no he didn’t, he ran away.) he highly recommends you to get the animal checked for any worms and other issues that it may have. not only that, he’s cautions and he doesn’t want you nor himself catching ringworm.

✶ he probably steals cat food for you, since he can’t be seen by humans and all that junk. but if you’ve bought the kitten from someone, he’s definitely smothering the kitten. he’ll think of it as his child, the single child that he’s always wanted. leo likes animals, to a certain extent, and he’s aware of the responsibility of taking care of an animal, especially a kitten.

✶ leo is more than willing to help you out with it, just ring him up and he’s there in a flash, literally. leonardo thinks that cats are cute and fluffy. he likes their purring and how they swipe toys around with their paws.

*◌ೃ࿔ ┆DONATELLO.

✶ honestly, I see donatello as a cat person. he likes their independence and quietness. although he’s aware of how loud they can get and would literally knock just about anything off your desk. but other than that, he likes cats. when he heard that you had just gotten a kitten. he wants to immediately know if that kitten is healthy and to see a vet if it’s a stray. it isn’t surprising that he’s awfully gentle with said kitten.

✶ he’s there with you when you’re picking it up and he wants to hold it the moment you get it, because he said so. this guy absolutely loves cats, he thinks they’re cutest shits on the planet.

✶ he tells you which brand of food is good for the kitten and what litter you should use and what type of litter box you should also get for it.. which some of them are quite expensive. not too worry, he’ll find a way to get you those nice things for your little kitten who will grow up to be spoiled.

✶ he gets toys for the kitten and would love it if the kitten laid on his lap as he pets it. the only thing he doesn’t like is shedding, he doesn’t like things sticking to his clothes that he decides to wear during that day.

*◌ೃ࿔ ┆MICHELANGELO.

✶ he’s also someone who loves animals. he watches enough videos about animals and non-domesticated cats, which he does not like watching all the time, for good reasons too. he literally would help you take care of it, because he wants to and he likes to spend time with the little kitten. he doesn’t care where you gotten it from he just thinks it’s cute to watch over, especially since it’s small and playful.

✶ he’s definitely been scratched and bitten by it. he forgave it because it’s just a baby and they almost always acted out during those ages. if it’s a baby where it still needs a bottle and it’s been abandoned or the mother isn’t around anymore, he’ll take care of it for you if you can’t do it on those days when you’re busy.

✶ he doesn’t really care too much about the shedding that cats do, he keeps those sticky rollers around to take off the fur before he returns home from spending time with you and the kitten.

✶ this guy squealed when he saw the kitten laying on its bed. his first instinct was to hold it. mikey loves animals, so whatever you bring home, he’s the first one, other than his brother raph to hold it and pet it, because he said so. he also adopted it along with you and helps you with feeding and treatments, that’s only if the little one has any, and bought it treats and whatnot.

end - I finally did it. I’ve finally finished this. this has been sitting in the drafts for, not too long, I think. but I’m just glad to have this done, but I’m sorry you had to wait a while for me to finish this. it’s 5:23am so ima try to go to sleep, gm everyone.

[ctheathy]

Yandere Kitsunami Headcanons

Kitsunami x Reader

Yandere Headcanons

Author's note: Kitsunami has to be one of the, if not my favourite character of the entire Sonic franchise🌊💙 Happy I finally got to write for him!

You: Look at him, he’s the boy of my dreams!!Kit: *drowning somebody alive and giggling*

Kit/Reader [Romantic//Platonic]

[Gender-neutral Darling|Female Darling|Male Darling]

Potential ⚠️ TWs⚠️ :

Attempted drowning • Co-dependency • Delusional behaviour • Possessiveness • Stalking • Unintentional gaslighting • Guilt tripping • Abandonment issues

*ೃ༄*ೃ༄*ೃ༄*ೃ༄*ೃ༄*ೃ༄*ೃ༄*ೃ༄*ೃ༄*ೃ༄

With the amount of attachment and connection issues he has, it honestly wouldn’t come off as a surprise at all when Kit manages to transition into a full-blown yandere. Just like how he’s dependant on Surge to make the decisions for him, he shall be dependant on you too. Just with some ... Higher measurements. He feels as if he needs you in order to breathe, in order to live. Kit would have an obsession triggered inside of him with minimum effort, a bad one for that matter; and it’s eerily easy to get him pushed to that state as well, being the more vulnerable one between both him and Surge.

I believe Kitsunami to be a fairly delusional but also possessive yandere. He truly believes himself to be best for you, including the things he’s done in your name. He absolutely despises seeing you among other mobians and it shows. He’d purposely put them in problematic situations with his water abilities, using his water tank to his advantage while practically making their life a living hell. His dislike torwards the said person blinding him from seeing the cold hard truth about who he’s become himself. He’s usually just one to observe fromout the background without interfering, but even Kit manages to have his breaking points; and it's not pretty for sure. The more resentment he grows towards the individual, the harsher and more damaging his tactics become. There would be times where he would forcefully blast boiling hot water towards the poor mobian, leaving them with a ton of burn marks to recover from. And in even worse case scenarios, attempting to drown the victim with his water strength.

Anytime you manage to spend time around another, Kit gets put in a state of panic; horrified for abandonment and clings to your side like there’s no tomorrow. You’d have to absolutely calm him down and have a long conversation with him for a good two hours or so for him to operate back onto his feet. It only becomes more difficult over time, much as he requires an amount of constant reassurance and validation for his actions that no living creature could ever provide. Even if you call him out for his deeds, he isn’t going to understand, which indicates just how much of a delusional mindset he's in. In his head, he views those around you as bad influences and threats and makes sure they pay the price for it, despite being innocent.

Though his desire to protect you and live up to your expectations is genuine, he fails to showcase this through an appropriate way. His attachment to you is unhealthy and he is just so damn desperate to make you proud, no matter the costs. He is also quite clingy to say the least. He is literally just following you around like a lost puppy and would prefer to never leave you out of his eyesight at all. Even if you set down boundaries for the sake of the healthiness of your relationship with one another, he tends to get too stressed to keep himself to them. His paranoias eating at him while it all just comes down to a stalker session. You even swore there had been times where you caught a glimpse of his glowing and recognisable magenta eyes in the corner of your room, in the middle of the night. Actually making you think you’re slowly losing your sanity to this boy.

Due to his timid nature and anxious behaviour being even worsened so after his obsession starts to take place, he most likely begins to influence his darling too. He is continuously dumping all his worries onto them and whispering paranoia’s in their ears, to the point it might even start to affect their own natural instinct. You have always been one to comfort Kit over his concerns instead of disregarding it like many others have done, but he just becomes so restless with his panic, it starts to rub off on you too. His pleads are alarming and nerve-wracking to you, but you cannot really say anything about it either. It gets to a point where you’re constantly wary of your surroundings and those around you, suspicions and fears lingering in the back of your mind which originally belonged to the teal furred fennec. At last, you might just be gaslighted into believing that he truly is the only safe space for you, being pulled into his own delusions. He’d already isolate you on a regular basis. And it honestly just gets to a point where you feel terrified of your own environment

*ೃ༄*ೃ༄*ೃ༄*ೃ༄*ೃ༄*ೃ༄*ೃ༄*ೃ༄*ೃ༄*ೃ༄

[whateverisbeautiful]

♥️ Ranking Richonne

#26: We Should Go To Washington (S5E09)

This moment - Powerful. Pivotal. Romantic. I’ve said before that I believe Rick and Michonne more fully fell in love with each other by the end of season 4. And to me, how they interact with each other throughout season 5 just further confirmed my theory, especially in this stunning episode 'What Happened And What's Going On.' And part of what's going on is Rick and Michonne falling for each other even more as they make a big game-changing decision rooted in the love and trust they've developed. I love that this is where Rick shows he would truly go the distance for Michonne...

(Sidenote: Now this scene ranking might be my most controversially-placed one because I know this is a very beloved classic Richonne scene that would understandably make a lot of ppl's Top 10s and even Top 5s. It’s a super significant moment between Rick and Michonne and I love it, I promise. Richonne's journey is just that abundant with top-10 worthy moments so I had to make some sacrifices on my list because I adore every second of every moment they’re on screen.😅)

So I already just love the way Rick and Michonne are color-coordinated in their brown outfits. So much of season 5 really established how R&M are a pair and each other's match.

And in this ep, Rick touches her, I believe, for the first time since she told him never to touch her again in s3., showing their growth and the strengthening of those magnets.

Something I appreciate about the Richonne 5B scenes that occur before they arrive at ASZ is that they really did an effective job of confirming the depth of their bond. During this period, we consistently see just how much Rick and Michonne's attraction to each other is more than skin-deep because they've built a genuine love and trust with each other.

They cement their partnership in so many ways during this time of searching for a home, and it's important to see this depicted before they enter ASZ because it lets you know that while there will be situations that could potentially cause a divide between them at Alexandria, it's 5B scenes like this Washington one that tell you Rick and Michonne's bond was too strong, too battle-tested, and too important to them for anything in ASZ to break it.

It’s also very clear throughout this season 5 mid-season premiere how much Michonne’s well-being is on Rick’s radar and really matters to him, and it becomes extra clear in this #26 scene here. 

Michonne is making her case for why this place could maybe still work as a home, only to find that the community clearly was brutally attacked as severed body parts lay scattered around. Michonne is quietly disappointed as she walks and observes, and Rick’s attention immediately shifts to her as he follows behind her. It’s one of the clearest cases of their damn-near literal magnetic connection. 🧲

She doesn’t leave his sight. Even when Glenn says, "it doesn’t matter," Rick stays staring at Michonne. I love that their “you're okay, I'm okay” interconnectedness is so visible. Michonne isn’t okay, and that so clearly doesn’t sit well with Rick, so she’s top of mind for him in this scene.

Glenn starts speaking, and Rick peels himself away from looking at Michonne to hear Glenn share a very bleak perspective on how it wouldn’t matter who killed Dawn. Michonne turns around and pitches that they go to Washington. At the end of this season, a very special scene will have Rick admitting the way Michonne can influence his decisions, and this moment in 5.09 is an example of that. 

Michonne turns to Rick and tells him they're close, and it's 100 miles away - and one thing I love about this point in their relationship is that she and Rick have established enough trust with each other that Michonne can be vulnerable enough to really show some raw emotion here and speak her mind. 

Rick listens as Michonne questions what if there are people there and what if it’s a chance to be safe. “It’s a possibility. It’s a chance” This is the season of Michonne really wanting tf to find a home and I know so much of that would be rooted in the fact that she was one of the few who knows what it’s like to extensively wander out in the woods and go a bit mad. She doesn’t want that for her and her new family.

Michonne gets more emotional but still with such poise as she suggests going to Washington is better than just being out there and just making it since making it looks like all those bodies sprawled on the ground. I love that she’s pouring her heart out to him. And what a great man that Rick is so ready to not take this lightly and to really hear her.

And we get another one of those long lingering looks from Rick as he stares right at her, listening. The arresting effect she always has on him is gold, and I appreciate that he lets her words seep in. Especially when Michonne asks, “Don’t you want one more day with with a chance?” 

Danai again slays the vulnerable delivery of that line and it’s also deep for Michonne to pose this question hoping Rick also wants to live and not just survive. This is important for her to know too because her last man had given up on trying to have one more day with a chance and so it’s great she gets this confirmation that Rick is different and far more aligned with her.

(Also watching s1 back, in the finale, Dr. Jenner asks what they want, and Rick says, “A chance.” which just further indicates how he and Michonne are cut from the same cloth) 

Then I love the romantic way this next part plays out cuz the walkers draw near, Rick says we should go, and Glenn and Michonne think he means we should leave the area. So Michonne turns away thinking her words fell on deaf ears, but then Rick reveals no I heard you and I will go where you lead, when he repeats her words and says, "It’s 100 miles away...We should go to Washington."

Hearing this gets both Glenn and Michonne to stop in their tracks and turn to look at Rick  Cuz this isn’t a choice Rick would make this quickly for just anyone. And Michonne’s look of surprise is so touching. I was just looking at this moment thinking - that’s right girl, he’d do anything for you.😊

I’ve always felt like in this scene Glenn is an adorable third wheel to the Richonne bubble because Rick is completely facing and staring at Michonne solely when he says this. It just makes it clear that he is declaring this because of her. Like of course he wants to secure a home for his whole family, but in this moment what's especially evident is Rick wants to give a home to Michonne.

So Rick makes this big decision for the group fully based on what Michonne thinks is best and once again it really was giving romantic when he looked right at her and said, "We should go to Washington."

And then Michonne's subtle smile...that’s an “I love this man” reaction, y’all. Better yet, she's looking at Rick like...

I appreciate how Rick and Michonne’s love for each other makes them do things differently, because while in the past it was said by Lori that Rick would never just go somewhere on a hunch, here he’s showing that he would go somewhere and bring all of tf with him if Michonne’s instincts say it’s a good move.

I love that here Rick can’t help but be so focused and in tune with her and Michonne can’t help but look at him with so much love. Again she gets confirmation Rick is different from her past and cut from the same cloth as her. The way Rick looks at her and looks away, I really feel like it’s a brief moment of him knowing that he so swiftly agreed to this for and because of her because he loves her. Whipped in the best healthiest way.

It's also great watching scenes like these back and knowing Rick is looking at the woman who he will go onto happily make his wife, and Michonne is looking at the man she will fully embrace as her husband. 🥰

All of Rick and Michonne's s5 scenes suggest that they had fallen for each other and were becoming more and more aware of how special and influential they were in each other's lives. And this moment was a beautiful illustration of what Richonne means to each other and what they’ll do for each other. Scenes like these - weighty, quiet, but full of love, just solidify that this is a beautiful love story for the ages. 😌