#but by the time august started like everything started going down hill

[thewhizzyhead]

Happy new year my dudes!!! May 2024 be so much fucking better than whatever the hell 2023 was!

[jk-kiwi]

Warmth of December

Warmth of December (18+) Characters - Sergeant JK x Y/N reader (woman) Genre - slow burn (?), strangers to lovers, basically everything is war themed, the story takes place in old time but is not an accurate representation of real life events, pretty much an old mentality on how things should be and about how people should act, THIS is fiction.  

Summary - Everyone wants a chance at freedom once a brutal war starts taking place, this also means that taking risks and dangerous paths is part of it. But what would you do when a chance for survival appears before you? Will you reach out and take it? Warnings - war stuff (blood, death, mentions bad things done to women, weapons and fights, etc.), angst, drama, fluff, fictional characters, 5 years age gap (20/25), older Jk, suggestive/smut, Jk is kinda cocky/arrogant and sometimes a jerk, he gets better after a while and becomes a total sweetheart, Jk hits a women once (not you), mentions of enslavement, women are kinda treated like objects that have no function other than being obedient housewives that must listen to their husband, mention of chastity/virginity, a lot of mixed feelings, slight aggression towards the reader, mentions of pregnancy.

MINORS PLEASE STAY AWAY! Warnings for the not so holy parts (18+) - they get naked in front of each other without doing it, mentions of soft and hard manhood as well as female parts, reader is inexperienced, they take things slow at first, it’s consensual, I won’t detail what I’m about to write because I’m embarrassed so read at your own risk, no heavy/crazy stuff though I think, they do it 3 times along the story, has some other suggestive parts. X<

Author’s note - Y/L/N Y/N stands for your first and last name. Also, NEVER in my life have I written smut, first time (probably last) don’t come for me if it’s bad, please. BTW It’s been a while since I’ve written something, this is also the longest one I've ever wrote. If there are any mistakes please let me know!

Enjoy!  Word count - 19k

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30 August 1955

“Keep quiet!” Poor heart beating out of your chest.

Step by step and you were almost out of this hell hole. You started clenching your long skirt tighter while the other three girls were following tightly through the thick blanket of rusty leaves. Escaping through the forest was not an easy task, especially for young women and since this damned war has started, more and more people seek liberty and justice. 

But it’s not that easy to seek freedom.

Around every corner you can find soldiers waiting to attack, and once you get caught by one of them, it’s game over. Dragged in a hidden place, if not taken right there and then for their own sick pleasure, losing all hope of a good life and just succumbing to the dark and shameful path you will have to live, if they pity you enough to let you do so.  

Every person wants a chance at freedom after all, right?  And because of this you are forced to take the risk. Either make it safe over the border, through the woods and get to a small town where you can start your life all over, or fall into the hands of the devil himself.  “I’m scared…” The youngest one of us, Mai, says, tears pooling in her eyes. At only 16 years old she’s forced to take such harsh decisions in order to gain safety. 

“Calm down, if you make too much noise we will get caught, that’s what you should be truly scared about.” Yun-Mi tries to reassure her, hoping she will calm down and not get us in trouble. With cold hands you push the bushes in front of our faces and look over to the hill we have to go across. Over the sun covered land we can see the thick border of trees, that’s it! That’s the last part we have to cross. After days of hiding and countless sleepless nights of looking around, we have finally made it.

”That’s it, right Y/N? That’s the border.” Jia, the oldest one exclaims in eagerness. “Yes, after that…we are finally free.” You can say, slight uneasiness crawling into your head, almost like you could predict something bad was going to happen. The three girls smile and hug each other, happy that they finally can get away from what the war has brought. “Let’s go then, what are we waiting for?!”

Oh, only if it was that easy. Perhaps this was the hardest part of all, beside the fact that this area was the most watched over because many attempted to cross over, the emptiness of the hill made the perfect chance of being spotted.

“Let’s go by the tree line, it’s much safer.” With a plan set, You try to take the lead.

Safe to say, the place looked deserted, the sun was almost setting and the only thing you could hear was the gentle sound of the wind. It was dangerous, luring people with its quiet demeanor, thinking you are safe until you wake up on the ground with a gushing gunshot wound and one or more soldiers on top of your body. With slow and steady steps the four of you go along the tree line, skirts raised above the knee level. If the nuns at church you used to live all these years would see, they for sure would pass out. 

“It seems clear.” Jia point’s out, looking around. And so you thought, until your head turned to look through the thick tree trunks, scanning the area below. In a split second making eye contact with a guy who was down at the river, he was watching you. 

Your blood ran cold, his head turned sideways, almost confused like, wondering if his mind was playing tricks. But when you saw him take his rifle out looking through the scope to confirm that what was happening was, in fact, the horrifying truth you will be living. “Get on the ground.” You managed to mutter when you saw him signal to someone while taking better aim, a horrifying grin spread across his face. 

“What?” The others ask. Your cold hands grab Mai by the shoulder, pulling her down with you, while yelling at the other two. “Get on the ground, now!” With your head down the only thing you could hear was a deafening shot. Looking back you see Jia holding her arm, bright red liquid staining the white fabric of her dress. All four of you fall to the ground, screaming and crying, finally grasping the situation. 

You try to keep composure, to look for a place to hide, but you were like a lost bunny that just fell into their prey's trap.

Dragging Mai away, Yun-Mi helping Jia follow, even though she screamed in pain and wiggled in shock. Looking around you try to find the best spot to hide, already hearing their footsteps getting closer. Still, you had some time to try and get away. 

“There!” you point at the overgrown bushes and piles of dead leaves and branches. They for sure will think you ran away and not look through the debris. So you get close, Yun-Mi stuffs Jia’s mouth with her apron to try to stop her screaming. 

“Keep quiet! They're going to catch us!” she manages to whisper, the girl nods and swallows the fear and pain she feels knowing this is the only chance for survival. And then you see one, pretty tall and muscular, a dark green hat covering his eyes, weapon in hand looking ready to strike anytime, clearly a soldier. Close to him another wonders, looking around cautiously trying to think of your steps.

You cuddle closer, hiding away in the leaves, eyes shutting tight holding your breaths. 

The two boys go down the path, while a surprising third goes up the hill towards the borders to check. That’s it, that’s our end. Knowing you are close they will continue to search until they find you, and then, God forbid, what’s going to happen. You try to think of a strategy, head running wild with possible solutions, in your madness I barely notice Yun-Mi’s hand tagging lightly on your skirt. “Y/N…” she whispers and then gulps. And so you open your eyes to see another pair in front, big and dark eyes scanning you like a predator. You reach under your dirty apron and slowly pull out the emergency knife you carried all this way, pointing it in his direction. He chuckles and tilts his head, amused by your bold reaction.

“Leave us alone!” You say, seeing his tongue pushing the inside of his cheek, his gaze still curious, but instead of doing something the only thing does is look around for his mates. 

That’s our chance! 

In an instant you try to launch at him and hit with the knife. With one hand he catches your arm, making the knife hit the ground. 

You wince in pain and he does not stop his actions, one of his knees presses over the knife while he maneuvers you around, your face hitting the ground roughly. 

You try to resist, but he catches your other hand and straddles your back making you unable to move under his heavy weight. 

“Get away from her!” Mai tries to come closer to hit him but his hands are quick, taking his pistol and pointing in her direction. “Have any other surprises left in you, pretty girl?” He says, hands starting to wander under my apron searching for other potential weapons making you feel disgusted. 

Though in fear, Yun-Mi drags her shaking body over, begging the man on her knees, her voice soft. “Please, I beg you, let her go!” The others crying too, probably aware of what was about to happen, seeing their fate being sealed through what was happening to you. “I have no intention of doing that, but I must say, you are some brave girls. Going around all this road for a chance to escape, on your own? No other man? Just four young girls.” He laughs a little, chilling your bones.

“Must say you have a lot of balls. You know what happens to people like you, right? If not, then I can only warn…not nice things.” He rises a bit, letting go of your arms, pistol pointed at the back of your head. “Turn around, I want to see your face.” You obey and turn around, the man still on top of you, his eyes boring along your body making you avoid his gaze.

“Hmm, not bad. How old are you? 18, 19?” Rough hand comes in contact with your face wiping the debris that got stuck before gripping at your jaw, turning your head to look at him.

“I asked you a question, therefore you should respond. Aren’t you in a bad position? Why are you making stuff harder for yourself?”. “I’ve just turned 20.” You spit through clenched teeth.  

He hums, seeming satisfied with the response. In a flash he gets off of you, putting his pistol back in his carrier, taking my knife from the grass. Quick footsteps being heard in the distance. 

“Sergeant! Have you found them?! We lost track!” An older guy approaches you. “Yes, four of them, pretty young. All girls by the way.” He says boringly. 

“Oh my! They really are pretty. What a delight.” Three other guys gather from behind, eyes praying over you, their faces plastered with sinister grins. “So, what do we do with them, sergeant?” asks another impatiently, hoping to get a green card for some potential hideous actions. The guy who found you, despite his appearance, looked to be the youngest, but also seems to be the leader. 

His body was pretty muscular, black hair almost covering his eyes, one of his hands covered in tattoos. He looked at you and caught your gaze again. You can see how his hand dips in his military jacket, searching for something before responding to his mates. 

“To be honest, we should follow the rules, right? All that are caught are enslaved, no other funny businesses." The three whine but obey his orders. 

His body crouches to your level, putting the knife under your chin making you gasp and close your eyes.”But I feel a little pleased with today's catch. To see such young women trying to fight for their lives in such a brutal world, tsk tsk, truly a pity.” He pushes the knife upwards, making you tilt your head with it. 

“Who wants to live from here?” He says delighted, devious plan coming together in his mind. 

Is he a sadist or what? Playing with your feelings for his own pleasure, enjoying seeing you suffer and making you beg for him to let you live?

The three girls start begging, even Jia, who’s body became pale from all the blood loss, raises her hands to pray for forgiveness in front of the soldiers. So you do what seems the best option, you wrap your hands around his one that holds the knife, pressing lightly, but enough feeling a warm droplet of blood drip down. “Would you look at that?” He doesn't even flinch, but you could see his muscles contracting in trying to hold the knife steady. “Let go. Do you want to die?” His face was stern, but amusement was growing behind his facade. “Yes, I would rather die than get dragged to who knows where, letting man touch and spoil me over and over like a slave. I refuse to go to that hell, so kill me.” He snatches the knife away, your head hitting his knee from lack of balance. You could hear his laugh seeing how pathetic you are in front of him. “You know…I really like you, very bold.” He gets up from the ground, his hand throws the thing he searched from under his jacket in your lap. You take it in your hands, it was a cold, shiny and silvery tag. It reads “Sergeant” on one side, with a few stars engraved showing his status, on the other side it’s only what I can figure it’s his name “Jeon Jungkook”. You look up at him, hands holding the cold chain, already knowing what it meant. He smiles cockily at you.

“Congratulations! I think you can call yourself a lucky lady, you know. If you think the place I was supposed to shove you was hell, then what can I say baby, I guess I just brought you back to heaven.” He says delightedly, before signaling his man to take your friends. 

You can hear them screaming and crying, trying desperately to free the grip these devils had on them. You bow your head down, refusing to witness the grotesque scene unfolding in front of your eyes. Jungkook comes over and with one arm he snatches you from the ground. “You need to wear it sweetheart, people will grow suspicious otherwise.” He puts the necklace over your head, sealing your faith as well. “Let’s go.” He says while dragging you with him, from now on his property to mess with. You tried to feel even in the slightest relieved, you were given a chance at a new life after all, right? 

The silver military pendant is only given as a token of proof for married women with high military men, showing their status and letting others know not to mess with them. But why did this feel different? Why you?

“I should be happier.”, that’s what you told yourself…happier that you lost your friends? Or that you are at the hand of such a man, someone you don’t know, that could use you like a puppet whenever he wants? 

You should've just taken the chance and stabbed yourself right there and then, only if you weren't such a coward. In the end, you just followed him around like a lost puppy, letting him drag you where he wanted, your body and soul now his to play with. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Shortly you two arrived at what seems to be a military camp, night already setting in. Your friends, nowhere to be found. 

The guy presumably named Jungkook took you to one of the tents, his by the looks of it. 

“We will leave tomorrow morning, I will show you where to wash up and I will bring you some clothes to wear.” He took off his jacket and boots laying back on the singular bed while you stayed close to the entrance, like a lost lamb. “Why are you doing this to me?” You ask quietly, breaking the silence, your eyes staring at the ground. Jungkook only sighed, didn't even bother to look your way. “You said you don’t want to go there, didn’t you? I fulfilled your wishes so be happy. You are not there, are you?” You didn’t know what to say or do, why did he even want to do this in the first place, it didn’t make any sense. “It does not make sense to me. Do you save all types of girls this way? If so, why not my friends too.” Now his attention was full on you, he sat up and looked at your figure. 

“Are you always such a pain? You got it better than the others, I gave you my tag, you get to marry a high rank military man, everyone is happy!” 

I scoff “I am not! I don’t understand your reasoning in wanting to marry me in the first place, I am just a low commoner that is basically a run-away! Why did you decide to save me and where did your men take my friends!” I ask authoritatively.  Jungkook groans, throwing his head back. “You really are a pain! If I knew I would’ve never taken you, maybe the crybaby would’ve been better.” He mutters the last part, but you hear it anyway. “I don’t need a reason to do this, I just wanted to. End of discussion.” He says making you look away annoyed. 

You see him get up, his body coming closer to yours. 

“Also, you better not tell a soul about this. If they ask, I just found you in a village and took you over because I fell in love with you, understood?” His presence was scary all of a sudden. Tall frame hovering over yours, dark eyes staring dangerously. 

“I saved you, so you owe me. If you say you wanted to cross the border and I took you in out of pity, or anything else that will bring trouble to me…then I will not hesitate to send you to a place worse than hell itself.”

You gulped even though your throat felt dry, he was intimidating.

“Those girls are not your friends anymore, we don’t speak of them, and if you want to live good then you follow what I say and are obedient to my words, understood?” His hand comes over to grab your cheek, not as rough as before, but with much more authority. You can only comply under his underwhelming presence. 

“Understood…” And with that he grabs your hand and a set of clothes, taking you to where the shower area is. 

… “So what do you think, prestigious?” He asks while you look around scanning the area. It was not much, but decent enough. It felt more like a communal shower than the prestigious luxury he was talking about. A simple room with a few shower heads and walls for a bit of privacy.

“You can shower wherever, the water is a little cold, but it’s still August, you should be fine.” And so you go behind the wall, slowly starting to undress. That is until you hear a whistle from behind the wall. 

“Why are you still here?!” You ask in horror only to make him laugh in response, already enjoying the situation. “I can’t let you THAT alone, what if you run away?”. “Don’t worry though, I promise I won’t peek, I’ll have all the time in the world to gush over your body.” He says suavely, making you gasp 

“I can’t do this like that! I am a woman after all, what about my chastity? Have a little decency!” You say in rage “And how can you even say such lewd words!”

“Relax, I will just stay here. I won’t just barge in like an animal. Plus isn’t it better? What if someone else decides to come and shower? You’ll be my wife soon, I will have to carve their eyes out if they see it before I do.” You were disgusted to say the least, such unscrupulous man. You sigh and with the little patience you had you decided that maybe it was for the best and just went with it. Jungkook seemed to keep his promise, every now and then your head peeking to look at what was he doing. 

He was leaning on the wall, arms crossed over his chest and eyes closed, he seemed tired. The peace around you was nice, but part of you was also longing for some discussion. 

After all, he was the first person to talk after all this time, of course, other than your now “not to speak of” friends. 

So you decided to break that silence and try to get to know him a little. “So, I should get to know you a little, I think.” Jungkook only hummed. “Jeon Jungkook is your name, as I recall from the tag, also a sergeant?” 

“Yup, I am him in flesh and bones.” “How old are you?” “24, 25 soon.” He was pretty stiff with his answers, but at least you hoped he responded honestly to your questions. 

You tried to think of some more stuff to ask, but Jungkook beat you to it. “How about you, I responded to all your questions, but I don’t even know your name.” “My name is Y/L/N Y/N” you tell him. “Pretty name.” He adds.

“So…Y/N, where are you from and why did you decide on doing these things?” You close the water and grab the towel Jungkook prepared. 

Sitting deep in thoughts while drying your hair, the bathroom became quiet.

 “It’s fine if you don’t want to say, I was just curious.” You can hear him taking a big breath of air before his steps start taking towards the door, he was leaving. “From a small village in the south.” You bluntly say, making the man stop in his tracks, his back facing you.

“I don’t have a family if you’re wondering, I grew up in the church. I wanted a better life since there was only misery there, that’s why I left.” 

You see the boy turn around, his eyes scanning your body, only wrapped in the towel, small droplets of water falling from your hair to the ground.

“It’s not polite to look at a girl like this, I didn’t wear my clothes yet so please just turn back around.” Embarrassment and shyness take over when you feel his deep stare, never being watched as exposed as now. 

He complies however, turning his body around, staying in front of the door, almost looking like he’s guarding it. 

“I see, so you are a church girl.” He snickers “I figured since I’ve seen you for the first time, the clothes gave it away pretty well, not to mention you look scared every time I get an inch closer.” “Is that a bad thing?” You ask. 

“Nope. Just so you know, I’m not exactly into practicing stuff like this, does not match my personality.” He says before exiting. Letting you put on the clothes Jungkook gave, most probably his.

“How did you become a sergeant at such young age?” You cautiously ask him while going back to the tent. “My dad is the general of the east side of the army, I worked hard to match his steps, but in the end I got stuck as a sergeant and was given my pluton.” 

The man opened the tent to let you enter, him following right after. 

“How are you not married yet? Especially having such a function and family, aren’t girls throwing themselves at you at any given chance?” Your bold question takes him by surprise.

“You became even bolder I see, already asking me personal stuff? Are you worried I have a wife and kids at home?” He asks cockily, making you look back at him with wide eyes.

Sure you have your doubts, but your thoughts were still pure, asking just to get to know him better. 

“I’m sorry, I didn’t think my question was intrusive. I wasn’t under any means doubting you!” I rush to say, my cheeks heating up making him chuckle again. 

“Don’t be so stiff, sugar, I was just playing around. Plus, you have the tag, don’t you, so no other women are involved.” He closes the tent letting behind him, inside only the small oil lamp give in some light.

Without care he starts pulling at his t-shirt, leaving his upper body exposed in your sight.  

Your eyes go wide, cheeks brighter than they were already, your hands fly up to cover up your vision. “Oh my lord! Have some decency, I am also here!” 

In the end you close your eyes and turn your back to him. However, when you can feel his muscular chest stick to your back you stiffen up. 

He leans down, his breath gently caressing your neck. “I wonder what are you going to do after we get married? Hide around and let me play catch with you, little one?” You gulp down, pressing your legs to the nightstand in front of you, his hands come from behind resting on the wooden surface, your face pure red now.

“You know…you’ll have duties to take care of as a wife, I am a man after all, I have my needs.” His lips brush ever so slightly to the side of your neck, leaving a lingering feeling on your soft skin. You never felt like this before.

“Jungkook…please” You breathlessly say while trying to get away from his hot embrace. But he only chuckles once again getting away from you. 

You can’t turn around, eyes fixed on the back of your hands while you can hear him taking his shirt on again and searching for a new set to wear. “I’ll go wash up too, go to sleep and don’t think of running away. This is my camp, I’ll find you.” 

And so he leaves. With shaky legs you lay on his bed. It smelled manly, a little bit like the forest, but it also had a sweet scent to it. Soon you get engulfed by the peace and quiet around, finally falling asleep in the comfort of his scent. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------

When you woke up in the morning, Jungkook wasn't here. You can’t recall him entering the tent after he left for the shower nor getting close to you again. But soon enough his footsteps enter the confined space making you sit up. 

“Slept well?” He asked while starting to gather his stuff, putting everything into a big wood box. You just stared at him blankly trying to process everything happening. 

“I asked if you slept well, sugar.” That damned nickname again. “Yeah, I guess you could say so, better than caves and leaf beds.” He hums, pleased. “Then we should get going, people are waiting for us back in the city.” He throws next to you what seems to be your clothes, now washed and dried overnight.

You go out after you’re done and with Jungkook’s help you step for the first time in a car. 

You can see some men get in the front seats while others help boarding up all types of boxes and gear.

“Do we leave for good?” I ask looking outside the window “Do you want to live in the forest?” He says mockingly. “When I said you were lucky it wasn’t a joke, today we are supposed to swap places with another pluton, if you were to cross today, your fate wouldn’t be as lucky.” 

You didn’t know what to say after that, part of you wanted to let Jungkook know you are at least a little thankful for his acts, but your mind drifts to the thoughts of Mai, Yun-Mi and Jia. You hope they are safe.

Jungkook forbade you to talk about them, telling you that his man won’t dare to stand in front of him, let alone say something about what happened. And safe to say he ensured that if you were smart enough you would live a peaceful and decent life by his side, outside of ruins and misery. … Entering the city you were slightly mesmerized, it was not of luxury, but at least it wasn’t run down or bombarded like the place you came from. 

You stopped after a long ride in front of a pretty big house, with a beautiful front garden and even a fountain and a swing on the side. 

“We are here” Jungkook said, getting out of the car and helping you out, once again, showing a warmer side to you. “What is this place?” You asked, looking around, trying to take in every detail. 

“It’s my family’s house, let’s get inside.” But before you could take on, a lady’s screams could be heard.

“Jungkook, my days, you’re back!” The lady, looking young as well, with long and black hair flowing down her shoulders, beautiful clothes and even well done make-up jumped in his arms, hugging him tight, her lips coming in contact with his cheek.

“Hey! Long time no see!” Jungkook hugged back, bright smile on his face, and for the first time you felt weird, almost…small like. 

Yes, you only knew him for a day, but the fact that he wants to marry you out of the blue yet he’s having women jump him right when he arrives home makes you feel just a little strange, like you didn’t fit in the picture. “I thought you weren't coming back this month at how long it took! Did you eat well? You seem a little thinner than last time I saw you.” The woman lets go of him with one arm, starting to feel around his biceps for any muscle loss. Jungkook smiles even more, his head bowing a little, letting a giggle out. “I’m fine, Yuna, just tough business getting the best of me.” The girl named Yuna seems to finally notice my awkward presence, she tilts her head, eyes locking into mine, her smile disappearing quickly. “Who is she?” 

Finally the two part ways and Jungkook remembers that he also brought you along. “A shit, yes, You almost forgot.” He clears his throat scratching the back of his neck in embarrassment. 

Coming closer he is taking your hand in his. “Yuna, this is Y/N.” 

His hand brushes over your shoulder coming in contact with the metal chain that rests on the base of your neck, pulling from under your ragged clothes his military tag. 

Yuna’s eyes widen when she sees you wearing his necklace, her body stiffening. You can’t help but feel like an intruder under her burning gaze. She tries to put on a smile, forced by any means. “So, you’re getting married…” That’s the only thing that managed to come out of her mouth. Jungkook smiles at you and says breathlessly “Yeah.” 

What a play pretend…

“That’s…wonderful news! I kept wondering when this was going to happen, being away from me and home all the time, I knew you would find someone to take your heart. I am so happy for you two!” Tears almost started forming in her eyes, but probably you were the only one to notice since Jungkook only thanked her lightly and started going towards the house, with your hand in his.

… “Don’t worry about meeting my father, he might seem stern, but he’s not a bad guy.” He instructs you 

“Yes.” “And don’t think he won’t like you because you are not rich or something, I am pretty sure he will be happy to know I found someone to love, even though it’s just a facade for us.” He whispers the last part.

“Yes, sure.” You were out of it, mind going blank now that you were here. He gave a small squish to your hand trying to knock some courage into you and knocked on the door, entering with you behind. “General!” He saluted, letting go of your hand, and waited for what seemed an order. “It’s fine, son, you are dismissed for today!” He got up from the chair and came over to pat him on the back. 

“I heard you did very well at the border, less people managed to escape this month, good job.” He smiled warmly. 

“Thank you, father.” They engage in some conversation that you don’t really grasp.

Instead, you stare at the ground hearing how he is so praised for doing such “horrible” things. 

Yes, it was his job after all, you knew it already. But it still felt painful thinking of all the other people that didn’t manage to escape. They exchanged some more words before his father’s eyes laid on you, same questions addressed, same acts put up. 

You only smiled at him, being as polite as possible while staying in front of such a big figure in the community. “You’re getting married!” He exclaimed with a big smile on his face when Jungkook points at the dangling tag you wear. 

“Oh thank the lord! It was about time, Jungkook!” 

Both of you were pretty embarrassed to say the least, his dad was already making plans on when the wedding should take place, where you two should stay and how many grandchildren he wanted, but to your relief Jungkook cut him short.

“Next week father, no fancy stuff, no big parties, I just want to get it done fast.” And so his smile witheres. 

“But son, this is your wedding! You will only have one, it can’t just be like this, you are a general’s son and also a highly respected member of the community!” His father argued, definitely not pleased by his son’s roughness in handling such a “big” event.

“I don’t care, I just want it done fast, you know I am not the man to celebrate such stuff. I just want to focus on future work and…my wife.” His eyes met yours, they looked brighter at you, reassuring even, making you wonder why is he so good at pretending. 

“But how about her, Y/N is this what you also want?” Your future “husband” looked a little stressed when you were addressed with such questions, not knowing whether you will comply with his act or not.

Smiling bright, you chuckle before responding. “Yes, sir, if this is what my husband wants I will comply, I trust his decisions.” You could finally see his features softening a little, relieved and happy with your answer. 

“Then…it’s set. It might not be what I dreamed of for you, but if you are fine like this then I will ask the priest to officiate the ceremony next week and move you into an apartment downtown.”

He smiled at us one last time, exchanging a few more words with his son and making the arrangements for our future before letting some maids show me around. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------

7 September 1955

The days have gone by quicker ever since you got into the city. You had a nice room where you stayed alone since Jungkook’s father said it’s immoral for the both of you to share the bed before being properly wed. The food was plenty and also the facilities were high quality, and the people around seemed decently kind.

The only downside, if you could call it like this, is you haven’t seen Jungkook as often since he’s apparently very busy all the time.

However, you had your chance at speaking with some of the people around his house, collecting crumbs about him and what he truly is like. 

The place was nice, and soon you started to feel much more at peace with the future life you were going to live, finding out that despite his appearance and inappropriate runny mouth, he was a well raised man. Right now you are standing in front of a mirror, dressed in a simplish white gown, hair and make-up perfectly done and a bouquet of white flowers in your hand. This was your big day, and looking back on what happened not long ago made you realize how much you've already changed.

After today you will not be a little kid anymore, you won’t need to run away or plan a better future. Still, everything is making you unsure, giving yourself away like this, for a man you barely knew made you just a little sad. “Are you ready? Oh my, how pretty you look!” In the time you spent at Jungkook’s house you managed to get along with an older lady, Miss Min, someone that knew him ever since he was a young child. 

You talked a little and bonded over tea and biscuits in the afternoon. She was the only one that really acknowledged your presence since Yuna only gave you stingy glares and huffed when you asked her little things, clearly not being fond of you, and the others only greeted and shied away knowing you will be a sergeant’s wife. “I think I am.” You said, going over the bottom of the dress once again, making sure there are no wrinkles and then taking a deep breath. Miss Min accompanied you to the church's door, where Jungkook’s father was waiting. Since you didn’t have any parental figure next to you, he took it upon himself to lead you to the altar. Inside the place was beautiful, there was some music playing in the background, and all of the people Jungkook knew were here, everyone was either a friend or relative to him. 

His father led you to him and you took his hand into yours. Looking around once again you felt alone. His smile was reassuring in a way, trying to calm your nerves down, but you just felt empty. The ceremony went over almost too fast, the priest said what he was supposed to say until now, the moment everyone was waiting for. “Do you, Jeon Jungkook, take Y/L/N Y/N to be your lawfully wedded wife, to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do you part?” 

“Yes!” 

And then he repeats his sentence, your eyes looking into Jungkook’s. Silence took over the place waiting for your response.

What should you do next? Say yes? If this was the answer, it felt wrong. 

You could feel a squish of your hands bring you back to where you are, the reality you are supposed to live, his eyes looking sternly while waiting for your answer letting you know that blowing your cover up now was not a good idea. “Yes.” And yes you say, people cheer, but there is no smile on your face. 

In other words, you feel like crying. 

Why were you doing this? Why are you marrying this man? The ceremony continues, vows are exchanged, vows that are fake, rings are exchanged, rings that just trap you into this unreal story, tied to a man you barely met.  “I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss the bride.”  And now a kiss. It was supposed to be the one you love to do this with you, to take these steps with you, but it’s not and so you close your eyes, a warm and soft pair of lips meet yours for the first time in your life, the saltiness of your tears taking away from how bitter everything feels. Everyone congratulates you, they are happy, and you, once again put on your facade and tell yourself to be grateful for what you have. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Time flies and after the wedding you are in front of your new apartment, smiling and saying goodbye. 

And then you find yourself inside the living room and soon enough in the room you are supposed to share, looking dumbfounded at your now to call husband. “Take them off.” He demands, arms crossed. 

No way you’re doing this…like this! “Can’t you hear me? Take your clothes off, I want to see you.” 

Your face burns red, arms wrapped around yourself, gripping the soft fabric tighter around you. Your ears refuse to acknowledge his words.

��If you don’t then I will.” The man takes a step further and you run towards what is supposed to be the bathroom door…locked. 

“So you really want to play like this, I thought you would be more understanding.” Jungkook comes over,  his hands drag you over to the bed sitting on the edge with you in front of him.  “Take your clothes off.” Burning gaze almost rips the dress itself. There is no escape from this so you start peeling at your clothes under his stare.

First is the vail that falls from your head, next he helps you with the zipper and then there you are, all naked in front of him, hands trying to hide what’s left of your dignity. He doesn't seem satisfied however, arms still crossed, eyes still burning on your body. 

“Are you a virgin?” You look up to him in shock, eyes wide, blood rushing to your already red cheeks. 

Was this a way to shame you? Asking these types of vulgar questions, making you do such things in front of him. “Is this your way to humiliate me?” You ask, voice small. “Nope, not at all.” You feel tears burning into the corner of your eyes, arms bending even more trying to make you disappear. 

“Is this embarrassing to you?” He asks curiously. 

“Yes…” you say in a whisper, hoping to ease some of the shame he’s making you feel. 

The man gets up, still fully clothed, big hands push you gently on the bed. 

You close your eyes, expecting something to happen, but you only feel a cold piece of material being thrown over you, a blanket. 

You are looking back at him confused, wondering if he’s just playing with you or making fun of you, but when you see him take off his clothes as well, you start to panic a little, not knowing where to look. “There you go, are you feeling better now that we both are naked?” You can’t look at him, body burning up under the covers. If you could dig a hole and crawl into it you would do so. 

Once again you expect him to do something, but he goes out of the room leaving you naked on the bed. Maybe he’s crazy, you think, but when you see him return with a knife you get worried. “What are you doing with that?” Gulping you asked. “Well it’s clear you have no idea of what we are supposed to do, and, to be honest, you don’t even seem fond of having sex with me.” You gasp at the boldness of his words. “See, you can’t even bear to hear the word itself!” “Meanwhile, just the thought of doing it LIKE this, makes me uncomfortable. It can’t even get up, see?” And you look at his member then away once again, making Jungkook laugh. 

“How about the knife, what are you doing with it?” Your mind is still filled with worry.

“You see, everyone expects us to consummate the marriage, Nana Min will come tomorrow to clean up. But since we can’t right now, I need to make it believable. I will just snip my finger a little, they won’t know where the blood came from anyways.” You try to calm down, at least he’s not forcing you into stuff, it’s just that, it’s weird. Doing so much for something so fake, he’s really on the long run. With a small wince he cuts himself a little on his palm, letting a few drops of blood to stain the covers. “Done.” The boy wipes his hand with a spare cloth until the blood stops and then crawls into the bed, laying on his back. “Let’s just go to sleep.” 

You stay seated at the edge of the bed, covers still fully on you so Jungkook takes this as a sign to try and comfort you, finally feeling a little bad about the way he acted towards you. 

Gently, pulling you back, until you lay flat against the bed, he unwraps the cocoon you created around you and pulls the sheet over both of you, leaving a little space in the middle so your naked bodies don’t touch. “You’re worried?” He asks. “I am.” You respond, turning your back to him.

“We can talk if you want too, don’t be so closed around me, aren’t I your husband?” “Fake husband, Jungkook, everything about this is fake.” Jungkook hums. 

“Yes, but…it doesn't mean we can’t work it better.” He proposes. “What even is the purpose? You don’t love me and I don’t love you.” You say revolted. "Y/N. How can I explain this to you?” He sighs. 

“I know we don’t know each other, and this is a play pretend right now, but we can work it out, we just need some time?” “Time for what?” You sound defeated, and so you feel, especially everytime you’re standing in front of this man, if you can’t read him, how can you even get close to him later on?  

“For the fact that I’m not as unfond of you as you think.” He blurts out taking you by surprise. “What?” You turn to face him, letting him see your tears, his hand coming to your cheek to wipe them away. “Come on, do you really think I would go this far for someone I want nothing to do with? Getting married, saving you and what not? I can’t say I love you right now, I just met you. But…you seem nice and I won’t complain if I get to spend my time with you.” You scoff shoving his hands away.

“So you only saved me because…I seem nice?” You prop on your elbow and look at him. “Yeah, and fierce, and determined, not someone who will beg for her life like all the others do, you seem like a strong woman who actually wants to do something in her life.” He also props himself on his elbow, looking at you with soft eyes. “I could’ve just sent you there with the others, but something in me just decided to keep you, that’s why we are here.” A fresh new wave of tears threaten to fall from your eyes “So you want to tell me, that you only got me to this point because I was appealing to you, like…an easy catch?” You scoff once again. “Yes, shitty reason, but these are my valid feelings, and I’m sorry if they hurt you.” You could feel the anger bubbling in your veins and it wasn’t even for Jungkook. He thought you were just a nice piece of meat he could have, and he was right. You just fell into his den and now he can just devour you whenever he feels like, only because you were that dumb.

You offered yourself to him without a fight since that seemed to be the most profitable option for you back then. 

“You think I’m a jerk right?” Oh and so much more, but now this is the jerk you are stuck with.

“Yes, I do, a big one, thinking of me as just an object you could have.” “You’ll learn to love me one day. I don’t plan on getting away from you.” The sincerity his eyes hold just confirmed everything you needed to know and “Never.” was your answer, deep inside knowing that this was not how things will be. Those were the last words spoken that night, before a sigh left his lips, probably tired and unsure himself of all of this.

You turned around, body seated as far as possible from him, emotions running wild, letting only time say how this will unfold. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------

22 December 1955

And time truly heals, at first it felt horrible, long days spent inside these walls, your husband being away, not like it mattered that much since you two were not making it easier for each other, being at each other's throats almost everyday. 

It’s been a month since you met, and then it’s been two, then three, and things started to calm down. 

And now you stay in front of your oven, almost end of December, eyes sparkling while looking at how beautifully the snowflakes fall from the sky before getting lost in the darkness of the night. 

The smell of baked cookies fills the apartment, maybe not as big as his father’s, but big enough for you two. 

Jungkook is not home yet, or so you think, but when you feel two strong arms wrapping around you from behind you can’t help but get startled. “Did I scare you bun?” His voice was gentle, his cold embracing slowly becoming filled with your warmth. Things did get better, and he was right. 

It took a while for him to pull at your heart strings, but once he started it was way too hard to stop. 

First, it was the nicknames, then he started to give you some of the space you needed to explore what you like, coming across your knitting hobby. 

He made sure you felt spoiled, always bringing back stuff so you could cook and bake for him since you were fond of homemade food, and he became fond of your cooking. 

He became more gentle and opened up about a lot of stuff to you, and slowly so did you. It was coming along nicely, you were both learning how to love each other. “What are you making?” He asked while sniffing the air. “Just some basic cookies, Christmas is right around the corner and I need to prepare. You said we are going to visit your father and I thought we could also bring some goods to him.”

He nozzles his nose on the side of your neck, a new stuff he likes to do to bring some butterflies in your stomach. “Did Nana Min come around today?” He asks while leaving a kiss on your cheek. “Yes, she did.” 

Ever since the first night here, lady Min made sure you two had great comfort, being his maid for so long already made things easier, and you don’t want to admit it but her presence did make you two get closer faster. “You smell nice.” His hands leave your waist and start getting dangerously low for your liking. Even though you two have been married for quite some time, you were still uneasy when Jungkook initiated things further than kissing, that also being a step taken very hard in your relationship.

He didn’t want to pressure you either, into doing something you possibly wouldn’t enjoy, but as he said once, he was a man and his needs started growing a little beyond the line, especially since you two started getting way closer. Stuff like intimacy was discussed before, he knew you didn’t have experience and you found out he lingered around sometimes, from having a few flings here and there to actually going to the more “exclusive” places of your times where you can pay for such services.

You were a little horrified to find about this, but he assured it was long in the past, just when his youth was kicking in, and it’s been years since he stopped going there. However, he did say he’s never gone with a virgin, so the doubts were still there, both of you felt them.

Your body rigids when his hands slips under your blouse. “Jungkook.” You try to warn him, but his mouth starts leaving small kisses to the side of your neck. 

“Relax baby.” And you try, until one of his hands slips under your bra, cupping your right breast. You whimper a little, eyes closing and only then Jungkook knows he’s gotten you right where he wanted once again. “Let’s go upstairs.” He stops the oven, leaving the cookies half baked, slowly guiding you to the bedroom. Hungry lips come in contact with yours even before entering the room, and you could feel that everything about this is different, but you don’t stop.

You learned now that he will never hurt you or go beyond something you don’t like, you just need to tell him and he’ll stop. “Can I take this off?” He asked since your bra straps were already going down your arms under your blouse. Jungkook’s hands were already toying with your breasts, yet he still was sweet enough to ask if he could remove your upper wear. 

“Yeah, please do so.” Your small voice was not uncertain yet, truth to be told, you’ve gone a few times through him groping and kissing on your body, more or less naked, but he never dared to touch beyond that, and you always made sure to stop him out of your own fears. With careful hands Jungkook takes off your blouse, unclasps your bra and lays you down on the bed, head right between the pillows. His lips trail down from your neck to your chest, stopping right above your breast before taking your nipple right on. He manages to rip a louder moan out of you, your back arching at the feeling making him grin. His hands help you out of your skirt, now only in your pair of panties in front of him, and when one of them starts to play with your underwear that’s when you let all of your insecurities take the better of you.

“Jungkook, stop.” You rise from the bed and try to avoid his gaze, you know he’s annoyed with your behavior, always stopping him before things become more serious, but he also realizes how scary this is for you. 

Your hands grip the sheets, eyes getting teary in frustration, a warm hand cups your face. “Look at me, Y/N.” Head turning slowly, soft dark brown eyes bore into yours. “We are never getting past this if you don’t trust me.” He says a little worried. “But I do trust you…I just…don’t trust me.” You sniffle and wipe the tear that just fell from your eye. The man in front of you giggles, he pulls his uniform off, leaving him only in his boxers and he rests his head on your shoulder leaving feathery kisses. “I told you I don’t care, good or bad I want you.”

You also rest your head on his shoulder, more tears wetting his skin in annoyment with yourself. “Will you be gentle with me?” He hums, wrapping his arms around your body, dragging you on his lap, letting you feel how hard he is for you. “I will go easy, and if you feel really bad just tell me to stop.” He lays you back eyes looking for reassurance before sliding your last piece of clothing off your body, and you give him the green after so long. Jungkook feels excitement bubbling inside him and he tries not to let his feelings get the best of him at this moment. 

“You look so pretty.” His palms start rubbing your legs up and down before parting them to look right where he wanted. One of your hands makes their way down quickly, but before you can hide away he takes your hand away making you whine. 

“Don’t look, please!” You say, embarrassment running through your veins “Then what am I supposed to do? I want to see it.” His comments always bold, making you bright red for him. “I have to touch you a little, you won’t be able to take it otherwise.” You bite your lips at his remark, already too embarrassed to say anything. You saw him, not once after that night, sometimes soft, sometimes hard, he was a lot. 

It worried you a little, however, his touch on your private parts made even the clearest part of your mind cloud. He touched lightly, playing with the bundle of nerves first, making you feel stuff you’ve never felt before, and then you felt it, one of his fingers, thick and slightly rough to the feeling, entering you. “Oh my God!” Your whole body contracted. It felt weird, not exactly bad, but weird, a new feeling. 

“Shhh, relax for me.” He made sure to kiss and caress you in such a way you wouldn’t feel the second going in just after. And slowly, you whimpered and squirmed around as he was pumping them in and out. 

“I don’t think I like this.” You say, a strange new feeling already developing inside of you. “You’re just close, don’t worry, you will feel better in a second.” He picked up his pace, thumb rubbing over your clit every time he pushed his fingers into you. “This is scary, please.” 

His lips reassure you a little when they make contact with your temple. “It’s going to be better, let it out, my soul.” And you overspill, all the emotions that bottled up spill right in that moment, a wave of pleasure washes over you making you almost scream. It takes you a minute to get down from the high you just had, your husband whispering how good you did for him while his hands leave your fluttering count. You close your eyes for a little until you hear some rustling around you. Jungkook is getting out of the bed, boxers still on hard cock threatening to escape out of them. 

“Where are you going?” You ask confused, awaken fast from the mind blowing pleasure you just felt. “I’ll run you a bath, I’ll be right back.” You rush to get up, hand managing to catch his.

“But why? Are we finished yet?” He smiles gently at you and pats your head. “You are a little overwhelmed right now, you just had your first ever orgasm, my love. Don't worry about me, if we go further it might be too much for you.” 

He tries to soften your grip and go but you hold even tighter. “No!” You jump out of the bed with wobbly legs, dragging him towards the bed and making him sit down on the edge. “You’re just working me up for nothing? I’ve been waiting for this and now that I have the courage you stop? What kind of man ar…” You try to revolt and anger him a little. And you also obtain what you want, he turns you around manhandling you, face in the sheets, his hard on pressing on your bum making you gasp. “You don’t know what you’re getting yourself into, I won’t be able to stop if we continue.” 

You turn your head to the left looking up at him, eyes clouded. “Maybe I don’t want you to stop.” He growls a little, warning you. “This attitude you have! Y/N, I don’t want to hurt you in any way, it will just make this experience bad for you.” 

He lets go and you turn around. “Please, I want this.” You beg him to please your wishes making him sigh once again, head dropping, finally giving in to your desires. “Just…hit me if it hurts or I don’t stop.” He crawls back in bed, sitting once again on top of you, his hand slip his boxers off, knocking the breath out of your lungs when you see him stand so tall in front of you, hand gripping his hot cock, his eyes clouded by his own desires.

“Spread nicely for me, love.” And you do so, much more confidently this time, excited even. Jungkook looks down at you, seeing how small you look under him, a little unsure if he really wants to continue, but you seem so excited to finally let things happen, so he caves in. Pumping himself a few times he rubs up and down to collect some of your left over wetness, his hand guiding the tip at your entrance. “It will hurt .” He warns. “It’s fine, I trust you, Jungkook.” You whisper, making his heart skip a beat knowing that you trust him so much. He bites his lip and with a small nudge he pushes lightly past the ring of your entrance looking over for any reaction, anything and he will pull out instantly.

You seem quiet and calm so he gathers some more courage to push just a little further, just until his head is in, and then he looks over to you seeing the signs already, tears pulling in your eyes and fists lightly clumping his pillow. 

“I’ll stop.” “No!” You say once again, more determined to try new stuff with the man you are finally in love with. ‘But you are in pain, love.” He coos softly. “Just do it please, it’s not that bad.” Jungkook pushes further and further until he is almost fully in, his face comes closer to yours just to kiss your lips and face and soothe the pain away, letting you adjust to the new feeling, giving him a nudge when you feel ready.

“I’ll move now, tell me if it’s too much.” And he slowly pulls out, a few droplets of blood staining the sheets. You moan harshly when he pushes in again, this time fitting all of himself inside you. 

And he holds you through the pain until you start to claw at his back, more sounds coming out of the both of you. “It’s starting to feel good.” You breathlessly say while the man above you seems to have his mind almost out of this world. It doesn't take much for the feeling to start appearing once again, warm bubbles forming in your tummy. “I’m close.” You say calmly, knowing what’s about to happen. “Me too, baby.” Your husband whispers breathlessly.  

Jungkook’s starts being a little rough making you whine while your walls contract at the sudden peace. “It’s just me baby, relax for me.” He says making you melt in his embrace. 

In a second the bubbles burst making you arch your back, scratching Jungkook’s with your nails in the process. And soon you feel it, the sloppy pace, the trembling and the even warmer feeling within your walls. Maybe you were inexperienced, but you knew what this meant. “Jungkook, did you…” Both of you were trying to catch your breath. “I’m sorry…I came inside…I told you I can’t stop.” The boy was ashamed, not being careful could lead to greater consequences, and he, for sure, did not want to knock you up on the first night you shared your love. 

Slowly he pulls out, looking at the mess he’s made, saying sorry once again. “If I get pregnant, you’re in big trouble, mister.” You laugh a little pulling him down for a kiss. 

“But until then let’s wash you up, you must be tired.” He says picking you up and carrying you in the bathroom. Life just gets sweeter and sweeter from a point, that’s what everyone says. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------

4 March 1956 Thankfully you didn’t manage to get pregnant from your first try, or second, or third, and the many more that followed after. At a point you even wondered if it was possible for you to carry. But your husband was not worried, he always said “When’s the time, it will happen.” 

To be honest, you think he was just grateful he didn’t have to worry about protection. You were at Jungkook’s family house right now. He was on his border shift and whenever that would happen, you would stay over with his father and the others. 

Winter was finally over, flowers started to bloom again and the weather was pretty warm for the beginning of spring. 

You were waiting patiently, it was time for your husband to return and everyone waited eagerly ever since they heard this month, due to their skilled squad, nobody managed to pass the border. 

You got used to it by now, old events long forgotten, your mind and soul accepting Jungkook’s work more and more, after all it was also part of him. Playing with the chain of your silver necklace, rocking on the swing in the front garden, looking outside through the thick fence at the various people passing by. Humming gently while letting the breeze run through your locks, a surprised voice calling your name. “Y/N?” You look up, eyes widening in surprise, happiness washing over you at the sight of Yun-Mi. She looked ravaged, her clothes were pretty dirty and she had some visible bruises on her, not to mention the prominent belly she was carrying. You wanted to say hi, to ask her how she’s doing, what happened all this time, worried about how did she end up in this state, but before your body to make a move Jungkook’s words came up in your mind “Those girls are not your friends anymore, we don’t speak of them, and if you want to live good then you follow what I say and be obedient, understood?”So you stop, you can’t do this. You avert her gaze and slowly get off the swing, turning your back to her, feet rushing to get inside. You hear her scream, her hands open the gate running after you. “You can’t do this to me! Why are you pretending you don’t know me?!” “I don’t know you! Please leave, this is private property!” You look back, she’s struggling with all that’s going on, but you don’t stop. In front of the door Yuna appears out due to all the noise and screams. You look at her expecting to call some guards, or do something about the situation but she just sits there, a small grin plastering her face in satisfaction. Within seconds, you fall to the ground, your feet tripping over a stone. Yun-Mi’s body turns you around, getting her form on top of you, one of her hands gripping your hair while the other hits the arms that tries to cover your face. “Get off me!” You scream in pain. “How can you do this! Filthy bitch! You don’t know me anymore? You don’t want to know what I went through while you lived a good life?!” And she hits even harder, tears coming out, running on your face. You close your eyes expecting more, but the only thing you can hear is her yelping. With trembling hands you try to arrange your hair. Looking up, your eyes only see the very furious figure of your husband, his hands gripping Yun-Mi’s hands above her head. 

“How can this happen in my yard, on my property!” His soldiers drag Yun-Mi’s body out of the garden while she’s pulling up a rage fit, screaming insults. Jungkook doesn't look at you first, his eyes lay on the girl in front of his house, who’s now avoiding his gaze, his father coming out from behind her shock plastered on his face. 

“What is happening here?” He rushes over to see my state. Jungkook grits his teeth, heavy and fast steps taken towards Yuna, both me and his father turn around to watch him. His hand came in contact with her arm, pulling her towards him. “Why did you let this happen?” Yuna bows her head, avoiding his glance. “Yuna, I’m asking one more time. Why did you let this woman hurt my wife?”  She looks at him through her lashes, biting her lips, spitting venomous words between her teeth. “She deserves it for stealing you away from me.” Slap Her face turns to the side, eyes widening and tears gathering in them. The man shakily exhales, his hand running through his hair in anger. 

“If you ever let my wife get hurt and do nothing about it, I will throw you out on the streets. Remember who brought you here and be grateful, not a greedy bitch who wants a married man’s attention.” With a low, dark tone he tells her. He’s finally coming closer to you, his father scolds him for hitting a woman, but he doesn’t seem to care. He tries to be gentle with you, but you can see he's still full of rage. “Are you okay, my soul?” You shake the dust of your dress, brushing your hair back, collecting the few strands that fall. “Yeah, I’m fine, a bit scuffed, that’s all.” He sighs, helping you get up from the ground. “Let’s get you inside and clean your wounds, I have something to discuss with my father.” He takes your hand in his and helps you inside the house, passing by Yuna whose body was on the ground, shaking from all the crying. Lady Min took care of you while Jungkook and his father went into his office to discuss. It didn’t take long to hear the shouting and arguing, at a point even some glass smashing to the ground.

“Oh my, what is happening in there? Today is not a good day.” She bandages you with worry and by the time she is done your husband storms more enraged out of his father’s office. “Come on Y/N, we’re leaving.” Using your name surely startled you, after months of being used to praises, your name felt strange coming out of his mouth. “You are not doing as you please, Jungkook! This is not your decision to take!” His father screams while going after him. “You can’t make me stay, this is my life! I’m 25 for fuck’s sake! I am allowed to make my own decisions!” And with that his hand grabs yours, pulling you out of the house, and pushing you into the backseat of his car. 

His dad still screaming after his son, but he wouldn’t turn back. He buckles up into the driver’s seat and drives you home. … “Pack up, tonight I’m coming for you.” He said sternly after you two entered the house. “Jungkook, what’s happening? Where are we going? Why were you fighting with your father?” He pinches the bridge of his nose, annoyed. “Answer me, please.”  You could see him clench his fists. “Pack up I said! And don’t ask stupid questions!” He growls violently back at you. Startled by his anger, you bow your head and nod, a little scared by his actions. What was happening to him all of a sudden?  You wanted to have answers, to not be in the shadows, clearly he didn’t want you to know. But you could only wonder, did something bad happen? Your husband sighs and comes closer to you, pulling you into his embrace, finally trying to calm his nerves down. “I’m sorry, love, didn’t mean to scream at you. Just pack up and I’ll explain to you on the way.” He kisses your temple going out of the door and right back at the car, leaving you alone in the cold and empty house.

… Packing up was definitely a challenge for you since there were many things you had now and don’t know if you need, but after a few hours you think you finally have everything essential down. 

The sky is dark now, a car stops in front of your door, and one of Jungkook’s soldiers boards your items in the trunk. In the backseat, your husband reads over some documents, his eyes soften when he sees you enter, he is way calmer now. “Hey.” His hand comes in contact with your hair, brushing gently through it. “Hey” You respond with a small smile, hands fidgety. “I know you are confused, but don’t worry. I’ll explain everything to you.” And he does. He told you how some of his soldiers died in a border attack, and how he was tired of doing this work, always seeing his mates pass away. He put up a petition to move departments and work in city patrolling and other governmental work instead, and it got approved. 

Not by his father though, who taught he doesn't have to move away in another city and work with the government, that sparked the argument between the two. He insisted on his son staying close to home since the war was getting rougher with many more enemy squads were coming closer to habitable places, the borders being attacked more often. 

But Jungkook made his decision, he was a 25 years old man after all, he needed to think about his whereabouts more and also take into consideration all ways to keep you safe. 

And now there were you going, another city, another house, another life to live. Looking into the night, part of you was conflicted. You knew your husband only wanted the best for you and himself, but leaving behind all that he knew, friends and family, was this really a good decision?  Your thoughts were all over the place with everything that happened too. I guess you could say your husband noticed your worries since he took you into his embrace, cuddling you close to the heart that was now beating only for you, your eyes slowly closing while listening to it, letting go of your worries for tomorrow.

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21 July 1956 

Months have gone by fast in the new city. At first, accommodation was hard. You knew no one and making friends was not an option when Jungkook, a highly seen sergeant now working with the government, was your husband. 

The place was poorer than the one you lived in before, that’s why people avoided you, being commoners made them afraid to engage so they don’t end up in prison or enslavement. In this case you remained alone, now already used to the feeling. However, your husband was more often at home since his duties didn’t make him take so much time apart, mostly working in the place you are settled. This also makes it easier for you to get even more closer to each other, almost a year passed since your meeting. Dates occurring more often, just like right now.  The last few days it rained quite a bit, but now the weather is starting to warm up again, making it perfect for spending your time out. And after spending so much boring time in your house, you filled a little basket with goods, took a nice blanket and urged your husband to get out for your little picnic, it was his day off after all, he should enjoy it. “Come on, Jungkook! Be a little faster!” You found yourself on a little hill right outside the city, it was pretty similar to the one you had back home, but with a better view and not as dangerous. You let your basket down, hands spreading the blanket nicely between the taller grass and the pretty summer wildflowers. Your husband chuckles at your eagerness, his back laying on the blanket while watching you rummage through the goods. “I hope I didn’t forget anything at home.” His hands pat your back urging you to lay down next to him. “We will enjoy what you brought, honey. Just sit and enjoy for now.” You sigh and shoot him a glance, but quickly conform and lay next to him staring at the clouds in the sky. “There are many clouds today, I hope it won’t rain.” Jungkook hums next to you, closing his eyes, enjoying the summer breeze. “I want to do it.”  You sit up so fast, clearly taken aback by his words, making him grin. Sure, you learned the hard way that he is the type of man who gets what he wants when he wants it, but right now? “Are you serious? This is supposed to be a nice evening that we both enjoy!” You nag at him. “And we will both enjoy it, I promise.” His arms wrap around your waist, dragging his body closer, lips make contact to your clothed thigh. 

Your hands try to push him away, but he doesn’t budge. “Jungkook, not now! We are in the open eye and…and what if someone just stumbles across us doing inappropriate things? That’s only going to ruin your reputation and make me want to vanish from the face of earth!” You try to fight back but in vain, his hands push you down to lay back on the blanket, his body hovering above you. Your hands grip his biceps, trying to stop him from running your skirt upwards, but when his sweet lips melt on the side of your neck you loosen up a little, letting him do whatever he wants. Soon enough the skirt of your dress is ridden above your waist, panties long forgotten to the side. Jungkook smirks while looking at how wet and glistening you are. “I missed this, I’ve been so busy lately that I forgot how pretty you look.” You slap his hand lightly, being embarrassed. He hums thinking about something, while you just lay there expecting his touch. “Is everything alright?” You ask, a little worried when he doesn’t touch you. “I’m contemplating on what to do, my fingers are dirty so I can’t use them, and going without prepping you will hurt.” 

Oh…he was just so thoughtful that it just melted you. You wanted to tell him that he can just put it in, you’ll endure. But before you can say anything his lips come in contact with your warm clit. You gasp in shock, fingers already tangling in his hair to try and push him away. He’s never done this to you before.  “Oh my lord! What are you doing!” But he doesn't budge, he only sucks harder around your folds, making you lean your head back moaning loudly. One of his hands pushes you down before coming to spread your thighs even more. His lips and tongue working wonders on you, almost making you forget about everything around, but getting you so, so flustered by all the slurping and licking sounds that fly in the air. Soon you feel your high coming and when the tip of his tongue brushes past your entrance you lose it, a high pitched moan leaving your throat while stars start to appear in the day sky. You breathe heavily, chest running up and down, legs shaking. Jungkook emerges from the skirt that fell down over his heads, lips glossy and grin almost as big as his pride from making you come so fast. “I think you are prepared enough now.” He pulls your skirt back up, gripping your legs and putting them over his shoulders, almost folding you in half. 

“I don’t want to know where you learn all of these nasty things from.” You say, finally getting back to your senses, only for a short time though. He laughs and pushes in, his cock sliding in and bottoming out instantly at how well prepped you were. “Would you look at that?” He cockily says. It only took him a few seconds of accommodation before starting to thrust quickly into you, making your breast almost spill from the confinement of your top. His lips eagerly nudge at your neck, hands not letting your legs slip from his shoulders. “Don’t worry, sunflower, you were the first one to try this one, until today I only see it done by others.” He whispers in your ears, making you clench tightly around him. Your arms grab him by his neck, pulling him closer, sweet sounds pouring into his ears making him hiss. “I’m embarrassed right now, you always pull stunts like this.” He laughs wholeheartedly, peace never slowing down. 

He gets up from your chest, eyes staring lovingly into yours before he stretches upwards, making him go even deeper if possible, also taking a moan out of you when you feel his tip gently nudge your cervix. “You’re a little deep…” Your heart flutters, fingers gently caressing his face. You could feel so much love all around you. Feeling your second orgasm come close, you turn your head looking at the sky above. It felt like you were the only ones under it at this moment. “I’m close, love.” You say. Jungkook’s peace also starts to wither, getting close to his own high. “Me too, my soul.” In an instant the love blooms between you two, your bodies burning up with passion and desire, the knots untying letting you claim each other once again. Both of you breath heavily, sweat running down your foreheads. He doesn’t pull out, but his arm reaches above your head, pushing him a little deeper once again, making you whine.

He comes down quickly not to hurt you, placing a daisy in your messy hair. “My beautiful flower.” He whispers, rough hands caressing the soft skin of your face making you blush even more. He collapses on top of you, your legs falling off his shoulders, but still feeling a little uncomfortable from all the soreness that’s appearing.  “Can you pull out, please?” “Nope.” He raises his head smiling smugly. “I’m getting sore.” “Sorry baby, but I’m starting to get a little worried by now. It’s been a year yet you are still not pregnant, not that I’m eager for a child, but I wonder what’s happening here.” He smiles and pecks your lips quickly.

“So these are your worries now? Weren’t you the one who said when it’s time it will come?” You scoff. “But it’s been long, what if you can’t get pregnant?” 

You frown a little, baby talking was a pretty sensitive topic, especially after so much trial and error. You didn't think it would affect you in any way, you were still young and if it was to come you will be more than happy to welcome a little bundle of joy. 

Jungkook didn’t seem very fond of the idea of having a baby either in the beginning, always saying how he was too busy to care for one. However, you are a little hurt now. Giving him a child is a dream of yours, but if that doesn’t happen, is your relationship going to stay the same? Maybe he will leave you for someone else that can give him one. Worry and insecurity starts growing into your veins. “It hurts, can you please get off.” You start to wiggle and he finally complies, pulling out and wiping you clean with a napkin. “It hurts badly? Did I hurt you?” He also grows worried, pulling your leg to inspect whether he hurt you badly or not. “It seems just like any other time after we’ve done it? Where does it hurt?” He asks, concerned. 

“Here…” You point to your heart, hurt more by the thoughts of him possibly leaving you for someone else then the soreness between your legs. 

He takes your hand in his and looks over you with worry. “Why? Is it bad, do we need to see a doctor?” You shake your head sitting up. “Will you leave me?” He tilts his head holding your hand close to his chest. “Leave you, no. Why would you think that?” “Because I might not be able to bear your children.” You sniffle. He laughs and puts your palm under his shirt, right where his heart sits. “Do you feel this? It beats for you and you only. Even if we can’t have them, this, what I feel for you…will never fade away, trust me.” The sincerity in his eyes and words make you tear up, cuddling closer to his chest to listen to the way his heart beats. And you stay close, holding each other until the sun almost dies down, enjoying his presence and eating all the goods you made. Packing everything up, Jungkook helps you on your feet, hands grabbing the basket and blanket. Thick and dark clouds covering what’s left of the sun. “I think it will rain tonight.” “Yes, so do I, we better hurry. I’m already dirty and I don’t want to wash up in the rain.” With quick steps you get back to the city. Welcomed by agitation right from the beginning. You grasp Jungkook’s hand tight and stick closer to him. “What is happening?” He asks, concerned.

We make our way into the madness, the rain starting to pour all of a sudden. Nobody can say anything, they just wander around, running and gathering what seems to be their belongings. Are they leaving? With heavy steps and hearts you arrive in front of your house, a car filled with military men waiting in front. “Stay here.” Jungkook instructs you, leaving the basket in your hands and covering your head with the blanket. 

You try to get closer to hear what’s happening, but all that you can see is Jungkook’s worried eyes. He gulps thickly and turns to you for a brief second, finally letting you see his glossy eyes. Without a word he jumps in the car and leaves. You remain alone on the streets, clothes drenched, the wooden basket falling from your hands on the ground. You stare into nothingness not wanting to believe that he just left without an explanation after sharing so much love. After what seemed to be an eternity, your sore and cold body finally moves. With shaky hands you pick up all the food that spilled on the road, most of it washed by the rain. Unknowingly tears start running down your face. You gathered everything and went inside. It was warm, but you just felt cold. 

After you wash up and lay in bed you can finally let all your emotions run wild, painful sobs being heard around the room in hopes of someone hearing them.

All you could do was wait…wait for his answers, wait for him to return home.

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19 August 1956 It’s been almost a month. A month since Jungkook left and never returned. You waited for a sign, you waited for him to show up at your door and jump in your arms. You always told yourself that no apologies can make you forgive him for this, but the truth is that you only needed to see his eyes, to feel his warmth and you know you will forget anything that has happened. You tried getting answers, but nobody knew much. You asked other military man to drive you to where he was, knowing that they knew where he was, but in vain. You were stuck for almost a month in this city, living like a widow instead of a happy wife. But now you know, a soldier came into the city and you overheard him saying how General Jeon was on death bed due to being injured in an attack in the city, his son getting ready to take his place. You almost fainted out of shock, not wanting to believe that was the truth, the reason your husband left without a trace. With the little power you had, after being drained out for so long, you gathered some necessities and jumped in the first communal carrier that was passing through the old city you lived in. And there you were, after many hours spent on the road, feet planted in front of the Jeon family house. The look of the place now eerie due to the attack of the enemies. You step inside the big garden, once decorated with pretty flowers, now only dirt and mud covering the yard, even the swing was just a pile of broken wood. Getting closer to the door you could feel your feet soften, shaking hands come in contact with the door knob. You enter, the house seeming devoid of life. Putting the little suitcase you carried down you scan the place for any movements. From the corner of your eyes you could see Jungkook’s father's office with a slightly open door. Your feet take slowly towards it, peeking through the gap. A figure sits lonely in the chair, head resting on the desk. Your heart skips a beat when you notice the messy hair of someone you know very well, Jungkook. Slowly you make your way in admiring his sleepy figure after all this time. His eyes carried dark circles under them, tired by all the work he had to do. Your hand makes its way to his locks, now just a little longer than you remember, but just as soft. You can’t help but let out a sigh at the sight of him, slight pang growing in your heart. He must have felt your touch, stirring in his sleep until his eyes opened and looked at you. He is shocked, jumping from his chair, strengthening his posture looking like he’s just seen a ghost. 

“Long time no see.” It’s the only thing you can say after so long. You had so many questions you wanted to ask, but it was hard to form them. “Y/N…” He mutters, hands rubbing his eyes in confusion, wondering if you would disappear. But you are still here, yet too calm. 

“You came.” He says. “You left me.” You respond.

He avoids your gaze, conscious of his actions and behavior. “I had no choice, my father is sick, I had to return, and…” “Stop, Jungkook.” He looks up at you, goosebumps appearing on his skin from your stern voice. “I don’t want to hear your nonsense, you left me. Why did you leave me?” He puts his hand on his forehead, eyes closing, trying to think of something to say. “I didn’t leave you, this is temporary, I would’ve returned to you, I would’ve come back home.” He argues back.

“When? I waited for a sign from you for almost a month.” You sniffle, eyes burning with tears that threaten to fall, the feeling way too overwhelming. 

“I waited for a letter, or a call! Someone to just appear at my door with any information. Hell, anything would’ve done!” You spit out in a blurry rush, afraid that he might just disappear again, leaving you alone and cold.  

“But you? You just left me there without any care, to rot and die from missing you so goddamn much…” You try to swallow the boulder you feel in your throat, but nothing can stop the feelings who already overspiled. Jungkook turns his head, eyes getting teary as well. “I had no choice, Y/N. He’s dying...” “And so was I!” Your fist hits his desk, rage burning like the salty tears that run on your face. “I was dying little by little everyday! I lived with you being away because I knew you would return. But now…you left without a word, I was worried sick! I didn’t think I'd see you again!” You bite your lip, the pressure making it almost bleed. “Stay out of it.” Your shoulders slouch, figure softening at his words. “Go back home and stay out of it, Y/N.” He looks sternly at you, after all this time still pulling this stupid obedience game. You’ve had enough. “If you don’t want me here and just continue to push me away, throwing me into the shadows then so be it, but don’t expect me to welcome you into my house, or my bed, or my heart anymore.” You grip with cold hands the tag that you wore for almost a year. In a swift motion, take it down from your neck, making Jungkook widen his eyes. “Don’t you dare!” He says, voice shaking. “Screw you.” Your hands throw the tag on the floor, landing right at his feet, turning your back to him you run out of the room, forgetting about everything else. Jungkook's body is stiff as a stone, head trying ever so hard to process what just happened. He missed you, he missed you like crazy. He imagined in his head the way you two would meet again, the way he would make it up and make you forget that he was even away. 

He ached to have you in his arms, to feel your touch, to kiss your lips. Now all that he could do was grip the piece of cold metal in his hands, sobs leaving his body uncontrollably. 

A warm hand places itself on the crown of his head, hoping that this was not the end, that you came back and forgave him, that he didn’t just lose you forever. It was Lady Min, however. Her eyes soft and warm, holding so much pity for the boy she raised all these years. “Oh my Jungkook. My swell little boy.” She pats his head while he cries and sobs, just like she was doing when he was just a small boy. “I-I lost her. Right?” He says through hiccups making her sigh.

“You only lose something you don’t care about anymore, Jungkook.” Her hands wipe his tears and help him back on his feet. “You are a soldier yourself, young boy. Are you going to lose without a proper battle?” He wipes his tears and calms down, holding the chain tightly to his chest. “No. I don’t want to let this happen.” “Then what are you waiting for? You’ve surely made many mistakes, but we are all humans after all, it’s in our nature to make mistakes. Y/N is a sweet girl, she will forgive you.” Jungkook gets a little courage from her reassuring words. “Go after your girl, Jungook. Don’t let her break away from you.” He nods and rushes after you, hands holding the tag like his life depends on it. … Things were just as heavy for you, already regretting having such attitude towards your husband. It was getting late and you needed a place to stay, since your old apartment was most probably sold already. You sigh, trying to wipe the remaining tear stains of your face, until a hand grabs your arm. You turn away alarmed, sensing that coming your way was only trouble. A man. His uniform was one of a soldier, face grinning from ear to ear, making goosebumps appear on your skin, this guy ment danger. 

“What’s a pretty lady like you doing at such late hour? Should I accompany you home?” You gulp and try to take your arm out of his grip, keeping as well as you can composure. “I’m fine, my husband’s waiting for me.” You say trying to free up once again, hoping he gets the signal and leaves you alone, but instead, another guy makes its way towards you two. “Is there a problem here?” He asks, looking at the shorter guy in front of him. You look pleadingly, hoping that he will instruct the one in letting you go, but you are so wrong. “She’s alone at night, in such place, I figured I could help her get back home.” 

The other guy laughs and shakes his head. “It’s pretty late, you are right.” And then you see it, the nasty stares you get, the way his hand goes ever so slightly upper on your arm. “Let go of me, I am a married woman, if my husband finds out both of you will be killed.” You try to say confidently, after all it’s the truth. You just gave them a chance to not experience their eyes being carved out, because if he finds out they touched you, not even begging and praying would help. “Come on, don’t be so stiff, it’s just some fun we can have before you get home, doesn’t it sound tempting?” You shake your head, finally understanding their motives. The other hand moves to pull out Jungkook’s tag, only to touch nothing in return. 

You threw the tag at him. You start gulping harder, body tensing up and muscles starting to shake. “Let go of me, I am not joking, my husband is in high military, if he finds out you will be tortured!” The men only laugh, the second guy comes close to you, gripping your hands from the back, while the first one plays with the ties on your top. 

“Let’s see what we have here.” He says untying your top, your cleavage now on sight. “Let me go, this is your last chance!” You try to wiggle out, but it’s in vain, they are way stronger and bigger than you. His hands work fast, dragging your top low enough for your bra to be in full sight, his disgusting hands pull down your arm one strap. “Oh! So pretty, do you see this? Such a tasty dinner for us.” Tears fall once again while you still try to resist, the soldier's hand reaches to cup your breast through your bra, but it never touches it. Everything stops in time for a second and you look at his wrist, blood rushing, a huge hole in it. The soldier looks confused until the pain and shock starts to kick in and he falls to the ground. The other one lets you go, trying to run away but two more shots could be heard, and he falls to the ground with a wound on each leg. You cover your chest with your arms, looking in the distance to see your husband. Eyes burning red in anger, in his hand shining the piece of metal you needed back so much. 

He rushes over, putting his hands on your shoulders to examine whether you got hurt or not. You feel too ashamed to look at him, other men have touched and seen your body. His hands put your necklace back on, his jacket is gently placed over your shoulders. “It’s okay, sweetheart, I am here now.” He grabs your trembling body in his arms, caressing your head and back, shushing and calming you down. He grabs you even closer while some of his men appear at the scene, he made his whole pluton to look after you. 

“Sergeant! What’s your order?” The men salute him with respect. “Get them away and I don’t care what you do to them, just don't have mercy, they touched what’s mine.” He said through gritted teeth, a dangerous, dark look on his face. “Yes, sir!” They all comply and try to take the two who are crying and begging for their lives, but Jungkook doesn’t budge, he just holds you close to him until you get back to the house. … After he made absolutely sure you weren’t hurt, he let you take a bath, saying he wants to discuss once you are ready for bed. And he stayed truthful to his words this time. Entering the room also ready for bed, he comes closer to you letting his body rest. “We should talk.” You hum, turning your body away from him. “I know you are upset with me, and you have the right to be so. But I love you, Y/N, I would never want to do something as cruel as leaving you all by yourself. I should’ve explained myself first instead of just leaving like an idiot.” He comes closer to you wrapping his arms around your form from behind. You shy away at his touch. “Please, don’t hide from me, I’ve made mistakes, I know, but I am so, so sorry, forgive me.” He whispers, his nose buried in the back of your neck. You want to cry, and it’s not even for the reason he thinks, you feel disgusted about what happened. “I’m dirty now, right?” You ask biting your bottom lip. “Dirty? In what way?” He slowly asks. “They’ve seen and touched, I’m disgraceful.” you say while your hand presses the tag closer into your skin. Jungkook rests on his elbow and turns you around so you could lay on your back. Hi other hand cups gently your face. “You are not dirty nor disgraceful.” His hands caress your features gently. “Don’t feel that way, please.” “But they touched me, they almost saw me naked.” 

Jungkook leans down and kisses your eyes, then goes lower and lower, spilling praises along the way, his lips stopping at the nape of your neck. “If you really feel like this then how about you let me see and touch? I would make everything go away, my sun, you would only remember my eyes and lips on your pretty body after this, what do you think?” You look away and lightly tug at the top, loosening it for him to see and touch, and he complies. “That’s my girl.” His touch was gentle, cupping everything he could, kissing everywhere was skin.” 

It felt intimate, not lustfull or filled with desire, just intimate. His hands gently run up and down your waist while his mouth runs over every little crevice making you forget those two disgusting men even exist, imprinting only Jungkook’s lips and scent in your skin. “Are you better now? No more bad thoughts?” He asks, head resting on your chest. “Yes, and I also want to say sorry, I shouldn't have reacted like I did, it only led to trouble.” He smiles and kisses between your breasts once again, then looks up and also captures your lips in a slow and tangy kiss, something to remember. After your quick reunion, Jungkook tells you all that has happened in the city and with his father, and how the government wants him to take his father’s place and become a general. You listen to all his worries, you cry together and laugh together, sharing some love in between. You stay up all night just talking and catching up, and until dawn arrives he also reveals that you two have to move away again, in the countryside this time. They have a vacation house there, and since the enemy started getting closer and closer, it would be best for you to remain in a safer and unpopulated area. Even though not pleased with the plan, you comply, knowing that he only wants what’s best for you, and getting you hurt or potentially killed is not in any of his strategies.

After all that you fall into a deep slumber, entangled in each other’s warmth, even though both of your heads were clouded with worry, you at least have each other, and from now on without any run-aways. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------

11 September 1956 After all that happened you wanted to stay and celebrate Jungkook’s 26th birthday, still hoping for some more time together, however, you were shortly after sent alone to the location of his vacation home. A beautiful, cozy house, with a big yard and a lake behind. It looked straight out of paradise. Jungkook kept sending you letters when he was away and couldn’t contact you on the landline, he promised to come and visit somewhere around mid september, before he will take on a dangerous mission, trying to annihilate all the enemy’s camps from your region.

You were scared to say the least. You were seeing him less and less and now he was about to go to war and fight for your region’s freedom. But you waited patiently, hoping that he will arrive soon so you can get a piece of his love once again. Possibly even the last, but you didn’t want to let those thoughts linger around your mind, he was a strong guy, you knew he could lead such missions with minimum damages done and high success rate. And so you waited, day after day, from sunrise till dusk. He promised you, and you knew he would come. Tonight was no special, September began warm in the beginning, but right now the cold started to settle more and more. It was just like you were feeling, the warmth you once felt was slowly losing its power, making you grow colder without him by your side. Putting one more log in the fireplace you sit down, eyes glaring into the open flames who burn hot and red. It’s quiet. But not even the quietness lasts long once you can hear a car stopping in front of your house, heart starting to beat faster, mind racing. He’s home.

With quick steps you rush to the door opening it, in front of you a tall figure, dressed in military attire, his smile bright when he sees your figure. You jump in his arms knowing he will catch you, and he does, even though outside was cold, his arms felt just as warm as ever. His lips even come in contact with yours, leaving a sweet feeling behind. “You came.” Voice barely a whisper, fighting back tears since you’ve cried too much lately. “I promised.” He also whispers to you, leading you both back inside, you still wrapped around in his arms. Once your feet were on the ground you could examine him, wondering if he’s eating properly, or taking care of him the way he always did. He looks almost the same, only his eyes seem a little tired, but they hold so many emotions that is easy to forget about it. “I can’t stay long.” He says, voice sweet but sad, you look down, staring at his feet. “You just came, now you have to leave?” You ask a little upset. “I’m sorry, sweetheart, tomorrow we set trace for the first camp. I wish I could've come sooner to spend some time with you, but I had so many things to take care of, they didn’t allow me to leave.” His hands caress your cheek, taking in that you were upset, making his heart swell with pain. But it was for the best, his duty is to keep the people safe, you being his first priority. 

And since the attacks started being more and more aggressive, his only choice was to send you away from population until he manages to take everything under control. “When will I see you again?” You ask, biting down the sobs that want to erupt. A war could take months if not years. Jungkook bites his bottom lip and looks away from you, his voice a whisper when he says “I don’t know…”. You fall on the rocking chair, head in your hands, breaking down in the end. He comes closer and kneels in front of you, resting his forehead on top of your head, breathing heavily while trying to surpass his own tears. “Please…just stay tonight.” You mutter, looking up at him with doe, teary eyes. “I can’t, love.” He tries to resist his desires to hold and love you. “You can leave in the morning, just stay tonight, please!.” You plead, and plead, begging him to hold you tight like your life depends on it. He swears and looks away, getting up from the ground and straight to the phone on your wall, finally giving in. He calls at his base to inform them he will be there first thing in the morning, but he can’t make it tonight. He turns to you giving a small smile. “You see the things you do to me? Didn’t I say a while ago to not bring me trouble?” You laugh and open your arms for him, not taking long to feel them wrap around you. “I wonder how you didn’t see I was trouble from the first time we met?” Your voice suave, enchanting even, luring him in even more. “Oh God, how I missed you.” He says leaving kisses down your neck. “Didn’t you say you weren’t a believer when we first met?” He grins at you unbuttoning your shirt, eyes never leaving yours, making you feel hotter than the fire burning next to you. “You start to believe a little when this is the woman you have next to you.” You laugh caressing his hair gently, looking how he manages to take off your top, bra following right after. “It’s been a while since I’ve seen you like this, still the hottest woman I’ve ever laid eyes on.” He says managing to make you blush. “Let’s go upstairs.” You say trying to pull him up, but he doesn’t budge. Instead, his arms carry you to the couch nearby, laying you down on it with him on top. “Here?” You ask unsure. “Yes, here, I can’t risk letting too much time pass by.” His hands worked fast, stripping you both of your clothes and turning you around to lay on your stomach. “What are you doing?” You ask looking back, but he doesn’t respond, only maneuvers your body in such a way that your bum is up in the air, making you exposed for him. 

“Jungkook, what is this?” You ask concerned. “Relax, I’ll make you feel good in just a bit.” And then you feel it, the tip of his member running slowly from your bundle of nerves till your entrance. You gasp at the feeling, having been deprived of touch for so long made you so wet and ready. He runs up and down a few more times before you could feel him penetrate your warm walls. “Honey, this is.” Your words get stuck in your throat when he fills you up fully without any warning or preparation, but you were so excited to have him again that he just slid right up without much worry. “You take me so well, so ready for me all the time, didn’t need preparation either.” He says, hands gripping the flesh of your ass firmly while moving in and out. “I missed you, that’s why.” You manage to make out through your moans. He whines when he realizes he touched your sweet spot, making you yelp loudly, hand thrown back trying to grip his wrist. He starts going a little faster making you see stars and shapes all around the room. “I’m close.” You say, high approaching at a rapid state, but in your disbelief he denies you and stops, pulling out completely making you whine. “Why? I was almost there.” He’s never denied you in the past, why now? “Don’t be greedy, soul. I need to have you for a little longer. Who knows when I can get another glimpse at this sweet pussy.” You gasp in embarrassment as he turns you around, your hands already gripping his strong back. He kisses you once again, longer, harder and so much sweeter before entering you again. This felt different than anything you’ve done with him. Hot bubbles of pleasure were bursting around you, both your bodies warmer than the burning fire. It felt so raw and so pure, just sincere love being exchanged like it was for the last time. Getting closer to the edge once again, your husband seemingly close too, this time. He rests his head on your shoulder, his breath tickling your neck. You scratch his back when maybe the best orgasm he’s ever given you washes over, followed by the feeling of warm cum stuffing your walls. For a few minutes the only things you could hear in the room were the creaking of the fire and two bodies trying so hard to catch their panting breaths, foreheads resting against each other. 

Jungkook raises his head to look at your figure, your eyes closed in a blissful haze. He smiles sadly knowing he can’t be here much longer, lips coming closer, catching yours in another kiss. “I love you.” He says, your eyes meeting just like the first day, this time instead of terror, only love and care could be seen. “I love you too.”

All night was filled with love, your two bodies melting into one another in front of the fireplace. Jungkook made sure you knew how much he loved you and assured you that you will meet again someday. Opening your eyes, trying to adjust to the light that was peeking through your bedroom window. You scanned the room remembering the events that happened last night making you smile, turning around you expected to see the face of your sleeping husband, but the bed was cold. You frown, knowing what it ment, he already left. 

He did say goodbye last night, but you were too tired to acknowledge it. You get up from the bed, legs almost giving up. You were dressed up in warm pajamas and even cleaned out, he must have done it for you while you were falling asleep. Going down the stairs, the house was empty, the car was not in front of your door anymore, the fire long gone. On the kitchen table there was a singular piece of paper, a letter. “My dear wife, Y/N. I’ve been gone for so long the past few months, busy and away. Forgive me. I know I might have never been the best husband for you, I always felt like I’ve been depriving you of the freedom you always craved for. But, believe me, all that I do is for you to get that freedom one day. I might be a hypocrite, making you wait over and over for me to come home just to give you bits and pieces of what you truly deserve.

And I thought of letting you go, having you achieve your own dreams and goals, but I am a greedy man…

It does not matter how far you run, it makes me run even faster after you. It does not matter how much you push me away, it just makes me want to come to you even more.

So, please, forgive me for everything. Not being there for you, letting you in the dark, wandering around uncertain paths. 

And in my shame I ask for you to wait for me once again, carry the thought of me in your head, and the tag I gave you close to your heart so you don’t forget me.

Until we meet again, my soul.

Yours to love, Jeon Jungkook.”

Soft tears fall onto the piece of paper, making the ink run, you fall to the ground clutching the piece close to your chest. 

How can you even forget him? You are so grateful for what he’s done for you. You smile, wiping your tears. The silver tag dangling in the air. You bring it close to your lips, leaving a warm kiss on his name, the name of the man who makes you feel so much. “I’ll wait for you, my love.” You whisper, clutching everything tight to you, praying he’ll come home safe and unharmed. One day you’ll have him back in your arms again.

—----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

31 December 1956

The last day of December.

Outside heavy snow is ripping through the night sky, letting a thick layer gather on the ground. In the suburbs a house could be seen, on the front porch the snow has been swept away. Looking towards the house, the man admires the scenery in front of him. Inside only a small light could be seen coming out from the front window, lighting his way. He takes small steps through the crunching snow, feet planted right outside the door when he’s hit with the warmth of home. His home. He doesn’t knock, only opens the door slowly, letting his frame inside.

In front of the fireplace, rocking on a chair, a woman could be seen. Her hands quickly knitting what seemed to be a small blanket. His eyes warm up at the sight in front of him, and she finally acknowledges his presence, stopping her hands to look at him. He smiles, taking a step closer until his eyes widen in surprise. With love filled eyes she looks at him, while her small hands uncover what seem to be the small outline of a belly. “Welcome home.” She says, opening her arms, making his eyes burn with happy tears, gently throwing himself in them.

Resting his head on her chest, listening to her heartbeat,

December has never felt so warm before.

[justin-chapmanswers]

If you don't mind me asking, is there any old Inanimate Insanity video that isn't available, lost media if you will. The only thing I can think of is the audition for fan character in season 1, it was mention on episode 5.5 and the Taco Show. I wonder if there is a way to view these video again, maybe saved somewhere. I think they are important part of the history of the show, but I understand if you don't want to reupload these video.

Golly golly. I think that pre-5.5 video is the main loss in terms of things that never got saved anywhere, especially before the hacking/deletion incident. There's also no record of the Inanimate Insanity Audition video, but that was on DuncanEpic not AnimationEpic. Nothing crazy about it, but a neat little archival of all the original character designs and requested audition lines. Bonus would be if there were video responses also still embedded, I watched all of those auditions back in 2011 so many times to see if I felt I could be the frontrunner for any of the roles.

Paper also gets the short end of the stick haha. Nothing that was uploaded, but I recorded two or three things for him in that 2011-2012 window that were started and never made. There was a short written/voiced with the start of animation starring Paper that I really remember super little about. Except for like... I him having a tough day and then tumbling down a hill. He was also the main guest on The Taco Show 2 (I think it was going to start inviting each contestant on to guest after their elimination?). Also don't remember anything from that script except for the fact that Knife was introduced late as Taco's bodyguard and he had to forcibly remove Paper from the premises. Paper had a repeated string of bad luck in all of these, which by-coincidence was replicated with the gag someone added into FFF 4.

And of course can't forget the Friday (Rebecca Black) cover music video that was organized by Nate Groth and started animation. Starring Balloon, with his pals Nickel and Knife. Good times.

But yes! The recommended character video you mentioned earlier, that was a FINALIZED gem lost to time when the April-August 2011 slate was wiped from the channel. STORYTIME.

Adam was going away to camp for the Summer, and he left Nate Groth and me with channel access and each a different responsibility. Nate was to create from scratch the entire video that asks the audience to submit a recommended character for consideration to join the game. Nate and I would pick the ten concepts we liked the most, Adam would pick which of the ten joined the game. It was like a five minute video narrated by Knife explaining everything.

Meanwhile, just Adam gave me episode 5 to upload on August 1st (in a time before scheduled videos). And Nate was not having it.

Nate felt like getting to upload an actual episode as opposed to the recommended character video was a MUCH cooler job. Envious, while Adam was away at camp and in the days leading up to August 1st, Nate changed the password to the account and locked me out in protest. I had to calmly address the situation, remind him of how awesome his recommended character video is, and assure him he can do the next episode upload whenever Adam cannot do it (which would of course never come to fruition cause he was only on the team for another month or so).

Nate shared the password and the episode got out on time, but Adam was frustrated with what happened and understandably locked out everyone else from the account. Nate, of course, got back into the account via (admittedly easy) security questions a few weeks later in his next fit of rage and deleted all of the videos- ironically, erasing his own video creation for all time.

[trenk379]

So this happened to me a month ago and I'm still mad and pretty much terrified of this incident.I'm posting this just to calm down for a few days for remembering about the game is pissing me off.

It was August of this year,i was scrolling down through steam and gamejolt to find some Sonic games to play,I'm a Sonic fan ever since I was 8, alright that's out of topic, but I did find something… interesting to say the least

… I found a port of Sonic 1 on steam for 5$, I did unfortunately bought the fucking game which was pretty much an awful idea, opening the game it was a PNG of the Sonic 1 title with the Green Hill Stage from Super Smash Bros Ultimate,yep i was scammed because of my excited dumbass but I decided to play the game to see how shit this game is.

The first zone was of course Green Hill Zone and I literally see the Sonic sprite from Sonic 1 on a Sky PNG background with low quality green hill ground,there was no animation either and Sonic didn't built up more speed while running,the game looked like it was made in Scratch which made me giggle a little bit but also disappointed,i later on found some platforms and some rings,the rings were just a PNG of the rings from Sonic Color and went on to jump over some spikes and other shit till I found a motobug PNG that's from Sonic Colors too,when I took damage 3 ring PNG’s just appeared for a 1 second and then disappeared getting my ring count to 0,after all of that nonsense I found the big ring for special stages,but after I jumped in I got to the next zone which was Chemical Plant Zone

Chemical Plant Zone was literally just Green Hill Zone with a Gray Sky PNG as the background this time with harder platforming and worse badnik placements,after doing all of that stupid ass platforming I found the big ring and jumped on it but after I did the game fucking crashed, I opened up the game and it has reset my progress making me play the 2 zones I just played again,pretty much wasted 15ish minutes over nothing,but half way through the level the game started freezing for some odd reason,I barely beat the Zone and went to Chemical Plant Zone.

EVERYTHING WAS GOING WRONG,my game was glitching out,the hole zone layout was going crazy and sprites of the game were just losing textures and we're just going around the screen,I was starting to panic and I closed the game,BUT THE GAME OPENED ITSELF,I was pretty much fuckin scared because I didn't know what to do in this situation because nothing like this ever happened to me,I tried to close the game again and again but the game would open again and again,I sadly had to continue playing the game.

After somehow beating Chemical Plant Zone,I was sent back to Green Hill Zone again with a new layout and platforms,I was confused and just continued and there were no enemies or rings this time.. but then the same thing happened again with the hole game going crazy and sprites just shaking everywhere but this time the screen was just shaking and shaking,I was getting more terrified but since I couldn't do anything other to play the game,I just continued playing the game,after a little bit of time I did find the big ring and jumped into it,but then the screen went dark for a little bit..

After some time the dark screen turned into a small square.. then a Sonic with no eyes,with less quills,white arms and red legs popped out from the black square,I jumped from that jumpscare and I was confused and scared for 2 minutes and then.. MY FILES AND MY PROGRAM AND ICONS WERE SLOWLY GETTING DELETED,after seeing that I realized that this was no ordinary scam game but a scam game with a FUCKING BOOT SECTOR VIRUS CODED INTO IT,I couldn't do anything as my PC slowly broke down and crashed,I turned it on and I saw the Blue Screen,which meant my PC was broken and needed repairing and such.

2 days after that hole incident,I tried to get my PC fixed but my PC was long gone,I had to buy a Laptop cuz I was wasted half of my money on the PC that broke down,I'm still pissed about that day,whenever you see an Official Sonic on steam or gamejolt that needs to be purchased with real life money DON’T BUY IT,ITS A SCAM GAME WITH A VIRUS! This will be the last time I talk about this incident or even post about it.I wish I wasn't that excited and I would have kept my PC and wouldn't have spent a lot of my money again. Please do not make the same mistake I did.

("Hedgehog Virus" is written by Trenk379)

[thenextdawn-temporarilyclosed]

One of Your Kind (Ch. 8)

Ch. 1 | Ch. 2 | Ch. 3 | Ch. 4 | Ch. 5 | Ch. 6 | Ch. 7 | Ch. 8 | Ch. 9 | Ch. 10

Word count: 4.0K

Summary: within hot girls summer and cute dates, November’s finally here and Wednesday’s finally streaming.

Warnings: make out session

Pairing: Jenna Ortega X Fem!Reader

———

May went by quickly. Jenna wanted to spend it alone with her family after being away from home for so long and of course you let her, knowing how much she cared about them, but you still obviously talked every night and every moment you could, without bothering her. She was getting called on interviews, the trailer for Wednesday season 1 will be released in August and there were already quite a few sneak peeks. As June came the two of you started hanging out more, whether it was at her place or around town: she knew that this show would make her quite a lot famous so she decided to take adventure of this remaining time to be herself and go around town without too many people recognizing her. She always wore sunglasses as to get recognized less, but you didn't mind as long as you were with her.

"Where are we going?" She asked you, as you drove slightly out of town. “You'll see when we get there" you teased only to watch her groan in annoyance. You reached some small forest with a trail, and you parked the car. “What, you're gonna take me here and kill me?" She giggled and you did too "well you're Wednesday here so it should be the other way around" you teased "I'm gonna need to cover your eyes. You trust me right?" She nodded and so did you, you covered her eyes and led her through the woods to the final destination."You're so gonna like this" you said as you gave her a peck on the cheek. You had brought her on top of a hill, the trees behind you and from there you could see the whole Los Angeles. You had set up everything you needed for a picnic, you had laid a blanket on the grass and had took some snacks. It was sunset so the view would be even better. As soon as you uncovered her eyes her jaw dropped and she looked down at what you had set up, she was stunned.

“This is my hideout" you started and wrapped your arms around her from behind "whenever I'm too overwhelmed or stressed I come here and relax. No one ever comes here and I never brought anyone here before you so we can make this our place?" You said and looked at her with a small smile “it can be your hideout too, for when you feel like you need alone time” you kissed her cheek again. And waited for her reply. “This is beautiful” she had been speechless until now, “no one has ever done this for me” she said and turned around to look at you, anyone watching from miles away could understand that Jenna was so in love with you and you were too. “You deserve this. Tell you what, tonight the sky will be clear. I also bought some blankets, we could stargaze?” Jenna smiled brightly and obviously agreed, she has never done this before and she was glad that her first time stargazing would be with you.

You were laying down on the blanket you had put on the ground, the sun had just finished setting and a few stars were visible already. Jenna had already snuggled up to you and you had your arms wrapped around her keeping her close to you. “You know, I’ve been thinking about switching careers,” you started and Jenna immediately turned to look at you “what why?” She said and you shrugged. You hoped you wouldn’t upset her with what you were going to say. “I don’t know, I just feel like directing is not my field? I know it’s what I studied for, but it’s not gratifying you know? I want to have more recognition for what I do. Maybe I could try being an actress?” Your revelation got Jenna at loss of words. She wasn’t expecting this, not at all. She thought you loved your work so this kind of left her shocked. “Are you upset?” You asked, seeing as she wasn’t giving you a reply. “It’s just that you studied hard for this job,” she said and you looked down. “You may have not gotten what you wanted, but it’s gonna take time. Being a good actress takes time to, and you know that. I don’t like this idea of yours but I’ll support it no matter what because I love you”

She was right after all, but how could you continue with that job, if you didn’t like it anymore? You have always been like this, ever since you were a child. You started sports, and then left them because they were either too hard or you didn’t like them anymore. This aspect of yours has never changed and will never leave you. “I love you too” you said and gave her a small sad smile. You know what she thought, she thought that you were wasting your studies, your scholarship and everything you had worked so hard to get. And maybe she was right. So you decided to hang on a little more with this job and see where it took you.

You had grown really close to Jenna’s family, her mom treated you like her own child: she made sure your were eating alright, she made sure that you weren’t stressing yourself out like Jenna was, and in general she made sure you were fine... She was to you the mother you never had. And Aliyah was the sister you never had. You texted every day, even if it was sharing some memes or silly pictures, the two of you were always in contact. Eventually the beach days came too, Jenna was always inviting you to go to the beach with her family and this was one of those days. It was a Tuesday, when almost everyone would be working and both of you were less at risk of being recognized, and less people would be at the beach. Jenna had been very playful and that’s why as you were applying a sun protection Jenna threw some sand directly at your legs. This is one of the things you hate about the beach: the sand sticking on your skin.

“Do that again and I’ll throw you in the water” you warned giggling, trying to brush the sand away. Unfortunately for you she didn’t listen and threw sand at your other leg, trying not to laugh at the face you made. “You asked for this” you walked over and picked her up, throwing her over your shoulder “no!” She laughed “let me go!” She kept laughing as you made your way towards the water, getting in until the water was slightly above your waist, her family laughing as they watched you from the beach “is the water cold?” She asked but you smirked and ignored her question “this is for not listening to me” you said and threw her in the water. For a brief second you saw her plug her nose and then you saw her emerge from the water with her mouth opened in an “O” shape from how cold the water was, and you couldn’t help but laugh at her face “you got what you deserved” you laughed and she did the same, as she splashed you. You nearly made the same face she did before and splashed her back.

You kept splashing each other and eventually you decided to “prank” her. You went underwater when she had her eyes closed from the water, and she soon noticed you weren’t splashing her anymore. “(Y/N)? Where are you?” She looked around, and you jumped up from behind her wrapping your arms around her as you heard her scream from the jump scare, but eventually she turned around in your arms and saw you smile at her “you’re even prettier in a bikini” you whispered and she smiled brightly before pulling you in for a sweet kiss, the kiss was salty due to the sea water as your lips danced in perfect sync, your arms in the small of her back and hers around your shoulders. At the moment it seemed that both of you didn’t care if her family was watching you, you didn’t care if paparazzis were around you were just living in the moment. You don’t get this many intimate moments with her so you took advantage of the few you had.

You weren’t even aware of the fact that her sisters were taking pictures of the two of you, but you just looked so cute that they HAD to take those pictures for you to keep. The morning at the beach was peaceful, but in the evening more people started coming and you had to keep affections low to a minimum. It was automatic now and both of you didn’t mind, as long as fans attentions were lowered to a minimum. And that’s exactly how it was, not many people knew her yet, maybe a little bit more after the fallout came out but still it wasn’t much. There were a couple girls asking her for photos and she always, happily obliged. Though you wondered, how would her fame affect your relationship? “What’s going on in that little head of yours?” Jenna asked after sitting down from the third photo of the day. She played with your hair with a small smile. “Nothing I was just thinking…”

“Thinking of what?” She asked you and you sighed. “You do realize that this show will make you hell of a lot more famous right?” She nodded and sighed, looking away from you, probably thinking the same things you were “how will it work for us? I mean- you probably won’t have time… with all the interviews and stuff.. I don’t know how relationships work in the acting field and.. I’m kinda scared” you looked down as well, taking a hold of her hand. “Babe… nothing’s gonna bring us apart. Not fame, not interviews, nothing. I’ll take you with me on interviews, awards and everything. I need you with me.” She said and made you look up at her placing a hand under your chin. You looked at her hopeful. “Are you.. sure?” You asked and she nodded, that small smile of hers you loved showing “yes I’m sure” she was about to give you a small kiss when two girls came up asking for another picture.

Then on another occasion, the two of you had gone out after dinner, just walking together into a park, hand in hand as you weren’t worried about paparazzis anymore. There weren’t many around her, just yet, so you didn’t have to worry. You had been trying to set up the prettiest dates for her to enjoy, but deep down you wanted to make the best out of this relationship before she got too busy and you were managing so far. The park was empty at this time of night and there weren’t many lights around this park, especially not around the lake that was inside of it. It was a small lake, where people usually rented boats but you didn’t need to do so to make this a romantic date. You liked simple dates and Jenna did too, so this would do. The weather made this even more romantic, because at some point it started raining all of the sudden. You weren’t about to ruin the date because of some rain and kissing under it has always been one of your desires with Jenna.

“We should go back home” she started, neither of you had an umbrella so she put her hood on “wait” you stopped her “a kiss under the rain sounds romantic don’t you think?” You said with a small smile and she giggled, taking her hood off before getting on her toes to kiss you. The way the rain kept pouring on you became irrelevant as you picked her up, her legs wrapping around your waist as you shared the softest kiss ever. You were so in love with each other that it seemed unreal, it almost seemed like the love you see in movies and impossible to find real life, but the two of you had it. You had it and you couldn’t be happier off the fact that it was with her. When you pulled back you saw her smiling at you and giggling, as she laid her head on your shoulder. “What?” You laughed as well as you helped her get off of you. “Nothing, this was such a great idea, but my mom is going to kill us” she warned “I couldn’t agree more” you said and finally the two of you started heading to her place. You had basically been living there recently, Jenna didn’t want you to be alone and you didn’t want that either.

And she was right, her mother was mad at the two of you but you couldn’t help but laugh at the situation. You had walked inside the house soaking and dripping, and when her mother pointed out the water trail you had left behind you you both lost it and started laughing non stop, Natalie eventually laughed too but basically ordered you to take a warm bath as to not get sick. Useless to say that you spent the whole time making out and just cuddling.

November arrived, Wednesday had just been released. You binge-watched the whole show in one day with her family, without Jenna as she insisted on not wanting to watch herself on screen. When watching it, you pointed out the scenes you directed, and only you noticed the differences of your scenes from Tim’s. His have better angulation, better lighting, better everything. In the meantime, with it only having been a week since Wednesday was released, Jenna’s fame had definitely increased. She wasn’t free of going in town without being recognized, she wasn’t free of hanging out with you or her family and it was stressing her out, way more than it should. You did your best, you tried being there for her, telling her that it was gonna be okay, that it was just the hype of the moment and that people were going to leave her alone, eventually.

It was the day of the premiere, you and Jenna had decided to sleep in as this would be a long, tiring day for her and she needed as much rest as possible, especially with all the stress she was enduring. You had woken up at around eleven in the morning, and as you rubbed your eyes you noticed that Jenna was sleeping in your arms. You gently played with the few wild hair that had gotten out of her messy bun, This was your way of waking her up gently and it always worked, she always woke up in a happy mood, Same as today. “Hmmm good morning” she said in a sleepy voice, and hid her face under your chin “good morning baby” you said and kissed her forehead, she gave you one of those sleepy smiles you loved. “Big day uh?” You said and she grunted, only pulling you in closer. “I don’t wannaaa” she dragged the last word and you only giggled in response. “I wanna be with you” she said and sleepily kissed your jaw.

As you were about to reply you got a notification on your phone. You grabbed it from your nightstand and took a look “HOLY SHIT” you nearly shouted, sitting up as you rushed your hands in your hair “what is it?” Jenna asked and sat up, “I got an invitation to the premiere-“ you said and she looked at you with a small smile “co-directors never get invited- this is not good” you said and got up, walking back and forth in the room “why is it not good exactly?” She asked as she crossed her legs. “I don’t have a dress? I don’t know how to do my make up I’m-I’m screwed” Jenna laughed and you stopped walking to look at her “what’s so funny?” You said and looked at her “babe, seriously? We have the same size, you’re just a bit taller. I can give you one of my dresses and my make up artists will do your make up and you’ll also have hair done” she said and you sighed, falling back on your bed. “Oh thank god” you said and watched her smile as well.

Her crew came sooner than expected after lunch. You couldn’t decide on a dress, they were all either too long, too short, too tight, too loose… how did Jenna deal with this every time was still a mystery to you, but you had to learn how to if you wanted to become an actress as well… so eventually you opted for this dress which you thought was very simple and didn’t steal Jenna’s spotlight, with the black dress and veil and everything she was just stunning. You were given white high heels, and you couldn’t even walk on them and it made Jenna laugh because you just looked so goofy, but with Jenna’s help you made it work.

Both you and Jenna decided that it would be a good idea to show up in two different cars as to not get too much attention, so you arrived first, just after Tim as the stars would be arriving later. You did get a few applauses, not as much as expected, but you’ll have time for that. You greeted Tim as you hadn’t seen him since you wrapped up filming and it was good seeing him again. The two of you were taken a few pictures, paparazzi mainly focusing on Tim but you didn’t mind. The actors started arriving, you knew Jenna would be the last to arrive because she wanted to build some suspense, so you took advantage of that time to catch up with Emma and everyone else. Emma basically jump-hugged you and you laughed as you hugged her back “so how are things going with Jenna?” She asked as she held your hands.

“Hush don’t say it out loud! People don’t know yet” luckily there wasn’t any attention on the two of you, the paparazzi were too busy greeting Gwendoline who had just arrived. “So you didn’t go public yet?” You shook your head, and Emma was about to speak again but she was called on the carpet for some photos and you stood there awkwardly, not many people knew you, and even less wanted pictures of you. When Jenna arrived your jaw nearly dropped. You had seen her in that dress back at her place, but not with hair and makeup done as well. She looked stunning to say the least. “You’re drooling” Emma said, you hadn’t even noticed her getting back at your side. “Shut up!” You giggled and nudged her shoulder. You went to greet Jenna and took advantage of the hug to tell her “you’re gorgeous” and it made her blush, but she laughed it off.

Eventually all of you were called on the carpet for some group photos, you as well as you stood by Tim and behind Jenna, you decided to “tease” her: paparazzis couldn’t see from this perspective so you gently traced your index finger on her spine, and you saw how she shivered under your touch, and in that moment she wanted nothing more than to turn around and kiss you, show everyone that you were hers, but she couldn’t, not yet. Soon enough everyone was being pulled away for interviews, and surprisingly you had one too. “(Y/N)(L/N) everyone! You look stunning tonight!” The woman said, and you smiled in response “thank you so much! You look good too” you replied back, “so how has this experience been for you? We know it’s your first important premiere” the interviewer said and you nodded “it is indeed. I have to say I was nervous at first, but now that everyone else arrived I’m feeling better”

“This show has definitely gotten a lot of attentions! How are you feeling about it?” You started noticing differences from positive interviews to negative ones “at first I was really, really scared. I mean we all know how my first project went, I was scared that my reputation would have ruined this show and I nearly gave up, but I had support. Me and Tim are very proud of how it turned out, I learned a lot from him” the woman nodded with a small smile as she continued with her questions. “You said you had support,” you nodded “how did your work get affected by friendships on set? I mean, you’re a pretty young director and you’re the same age as the actors right?” You nodded again and smiled “yeah, the others really played a really big part in my life during those months of filming. Especially Jenna, we already worked together on the fallout as you may know, but we got even closer, she’s one of the main reasons I didn’t give up” you nodded to yourself with a small smile, the interviewer seemed to be satisfied with your answer as she continued.

“Well we can definitely expect big things from you (Y/N)” you nodded in thanks “are you working on any project or planning to work on one?” Million dollars question. “Uhm I’m actually thinking of switching careers” you started “directing is fun and gives lots of satisfaction, but I would like to try something new you know? Maybe acting is a better field for me” you said with a small smile. The woman, seeming satisfied enough with your answers said goodbye to you and let you go back to the others. The premiere itself was good, paparazzi taking photos and your friends being interviewed… you just took in the atmosphere. It felt nice if you stopped to think about it. Everyone was there to see Jenna because they loved her, they loved her performance, and not so secretly you thought about how that would feel if people were there to see you.

As you stood aside talking to occasional people and other random actors, eventually the premiere came to an end. You were all leaving, the actors in front while you and Tim stood back, paparazzi taking pictures of the actors as y’all went by. But then Jenna’s steps faltered, she turned around and walked to where you were at the end of the line, taking your hand as she basically started running to her car “Jenna what the hell-“ you said through giggles as she dragged you to her car, trying to keep balance as you still couldn’t walk on those heels. “We’re leaving together” you looked at her in confusion “…okay?” You looked back at Emma and the others and shrugged, before being pulled into Jenna’s car.

You were great for the dark tinted windows because as soon as the car left Jenna sat on your lap, straddling you as she started kissing you deeply. Hands cupping your cheeks and yours went to her waist, “you looked so pretty tonight,” she said in in between kisses and deep breaths “I couldn’t take my eyes off of you” she said and moved to your neck, where she licked, sucked and bit down on your skin, making a soft moan escape your lips. “I can’t get enough of you” she said, you loved this side of her, when she gets touchy and flirty and wanting to make you hers… you love that. Eventually the two of you arrived home, luckily to your apartment as you lived alone, and you made it to the bedroom between kisses, Jenna wanted so bad to get rid of your dress, but she waited for your consent, as the two of you had never done this together.

Suddenly, you pulled back from her “Jen… I’m ready” you told her while trying to catch your breath. Jenna smiled brightly and the both of you discarded of your dresses and made love into the night for the first time, together.

A/N: next chapter will probably contain a lot of angst so grab the popcorn and get ready!

Tags: @idkjustliving2 @tundra1029 @engenelxver @rainbow-love4ever @gimaximoff @fashromanmaximoff @wol-fica @lum13 @eviekensington @wifeyjennaortega @i984 @otherstainedrose @rockwyn @jujuu23

[thestarsarecool]

Q: You’ve spoken a bit about the depression you experienced after The Beatles split. Has the whole process of navigating fame and the pressures of the music industry affected your mental health?

PAUL McCARTNEY: I think so, yes. But, in truth, I just took to booze. There wasn’t much time to have mental health issues, it was just, fuck it, it’s boozing or sleeping. But I’m sure it did, as they were very depressing times. It’s funny, I remember when I first met Linda, she was divorced with a child and living in New York and having to fend for herself. She got depression and I remember her saying she made a decision. She said, “You know what? I’m not going to have this depression, because if I do I’m going to be in the hands of other people. And I’m not going to allow that to happen.” So she sort of picked herself up by her bootstraps and said, “I’ve got to get out of this myself.” And I think that was what I was able to do, to get out of the depression by saying, “OK, this is really bad and I’ve got to do something about it.” So I did. And I think that’s my way, almost by being my own psychiatrist. You say, “This is not cool. You’re not as bad as you think you are” and all of the things. So you start to think, “OK.”

For instance, John saying, “All you ever wrote was ‘Yesterday’.” No. Wait a minute. “Let It Be”, “Eleanor Rigby”, “Lady Madonna”, for fuck’s sake. And I was happy to tell myself all of this. There’s more! “Hey Jude”, “The Fool On The Hill”, whatever. I think that’s how I got out of it, by persuading myself that it wasn’t a good idea to give in to my depression and my doubts. I had to look for ways...

But this is a common phenomenon. I remember talking to Lady Gaga once about something we were doing together – I’m dropping all the names! – and she was saying, “Well, there’s the self-loathing.” And I think, “Shit, that’s the first time I’d ever heard anyone talk about that.” And her, she was, like, at the top of her game, massively popular and everything she was doing was a hit, but she was just talking about self-loathing. And I’m saying, “I kind of know what you mean, but I’m not allowing that. I’m not having that. It’s not a road I want to go down.”

But you do get it. Any time you write a song, you’re going, “This is crap. This is terrible. Come on.” So I kick myself and say, “Get it better. If it’s terrible, get it better.” And sometimes someone will come along, someone who you respect, and say, “No, that’s great. Don’t worry about that,” and then show you a side to it that you didn’t notice and then you’ll go, “Oh, yeah.”

— Paul McCartney, GQ Magazine, 4th August 2020

[thereweresunflowers]

🌿 rosemary and time 🕰️

thasmin - 2,345 words - rating: G - beach scene and boundaries - read on ao3!

What you said, Doctor, about living in the present while we still have it,” Yaz starts. “Last time we were on a beach. Well—we’re time travellers, everything is the present to us."

The TARDIS brings Yaz and the Doctor to ye olde seaside Scarborough Fair, and Yaz takes another chance on a beach to tell the Doctor just how much she means to her.

written for the @thasminsecretsanta run by the ever brilliant lina, as a gift for @thirteensfavoritetoy! thank you for such a thoughtful prompt, i had wonderful fun with it. have the happiest of holidays and merry christmas!!

read the whole fic below the cut!

“Scarborough fair!” the Doctor announces, whirling her way across the control room. It’s just her and Yaz in the TARDIS, Dan having popped home for a sleep in his own bed, and Yaz is glad the Doctor has taken this as a chance for the two of them to adventure together. They could’ve gone straight to the next morning and picked Dan right back up again, but he shut the doors behind him and the Doctor turned to her and asked, “fancy a trip just us?”

And how can Yaz ever resist a question like that? How can anyone?

So, Scarborough fair. “But not like the Simon and Garfunkel song, though that is very good. No, I’m talking about the actual fair itself that the song was based on—held in Scarborough every August and September from 1253 until over a century later. Merchants, entertainment, good food, good people.” The Doctor glances up from where she’s fiddling busily with the controls. For a second, there’s the slightest hint of bashfulness in her as she looks up through her eyelashes. “That sound alright?”

Yaz beams, the Doctor leaving her a little helpless as she always does. “Sounds perfect.”

The Doctor looks at Yaz and Yaz looks at the Doctor and even as the TARDIS engine thrums into life and jolts them across space and time, the connection between them remains unbroken.

**

“I don’t think it’s August,” Yaz says, blisteringly cold wind whipping about her face as she stands a few tender steps outside of the TARDIS. “And I can’t see a fair.”

The Doctor pouts as she rambles to a stop beside her, hands on her hips in dismay. “Well, at least it’s still Scarborough,” she salvages.

“How can you tell?”

“Slight tinge of rosemary and thyme alongside the sea salt in the air.”

“You’re kidding.”

“Am not! Seems we’re just a few months out of where we wanted to be. It’s 1303 like I’d hoped, fiftieth anniversary of the fair. It’s just we’re a few months late.” The Doctor squints, taking in the view around them which is lit with dazzling winter sun. 

The sky is a crystal blue, pure and clear, boundlessly spanning the horizons and unbroken by clouds. They’ve arrived midway up a sloping cliff, the land around them climbing upwards and lush with coastal bracken. On one side, the hill rises to meet a large stone wall, behind which must stand a busting castle judging by the great tower above them and the chatter being carried down to them on the sea breeze. On the other, the grass drops and rolls down to a large sandy beach. Waves beat frostily upon the shore. Huddled behind the sandbanks, the town of Scarborough stands, all twisty streets and wood framed houses latched up to beat the winter cold.

“You know, I don’t think the TARDIS ever lands exactly where you tell it to,” Yaz laughs, pulling her jacket closer around her.

“Ah, more fun that way,” the Doctor grins. She pats the weathered side of the blue box with a fond hand. “She takes us where we need to go. Maybe Scarborough only needs us in December.”

The TARDIS gave us a beach, Yaz thinks. Maybe she knows. Maybe she’s telling us to try again. 

She nods, tries to let her next words sound nonchalant.“Or maybe we need Scarborough.”

Nonchalance is hard with the Doctor, though. Truthfully, Yaz has never cared so much before, about anything. Anyone. But if her earnestness slips through, the Doctor doesn’t show that she notices it. 

“You look a bit chilly, d’ya want my coat?” the Doctor blathers, “if I’d have known it was gonna be so cold I would’ve brought me scarf out, found you a hat or something.”

Yaz goes to protest but the Doctor is already shrugging her coat off, bundling the soft fabric into Yaz’s hands with a certain determination. The cloth is warm with the Doctor’s body heat, the material made all the more welcome against Yaz’s cold palms. 

“But you’ll get cold,” Yaz attempts.

“Well you���re cold already, and I’m an alien, I’m built weird. Temperature works differently for me.”

Yaz isn’t sure about the accuracy of that statement, but she can tell by the insistence in the Doctor’s voice that she isn’t about to take no for an answer. 

“Alright, alright,” she says, giving in. She slips her arms through the slightly-too-big coat, laughing as the hood falls over her head in the movements of putting it on. 

A gentle hand pulls the hood back from Yaz’s eyes and the world blossoms back into colour. “There you are,” the Doctor chuckles. She looks Yaz up and down, just once, an approving smile growing on her face. “Nice,” she murmurs. For the slightest second, Yaz catches that hint of bashfulness again. Can’t quite work out if her newfound warmth is coming from the coat or the way the Doctor is looking at her. But then the Doctor is back to her usual brashness and is taking her hand and tugging her along the cliff. 

**

They could’ve gone up to Scarborough Castle, seen it brimming with Plantagenet life in the festive season. They could’ve headed for the town, found a pub or some grub and walked among the common folk living their wonderfully ordinary lives. That’s Yaz’s favourite part of visiting the past—seeing the everyday. The Doctor can get them in anywhere, they can always meet a monarch or find the seedling moments of a legacy. But stumbling across someone incredible who will undoubtedly, eventually, be forgotten, that is special. 21st century Yaz can remember 14th century friends and travel to the year 3000, and her memories coming with her too means there is a little piece of the 14th century common folk out among the future stars. 

But today they do neither of those things, although Yaz can tell the Doctor desperately wants to. The Doctor asked Yaz where she wanted to go and with all the history between them, with the TARDIS bringing them here, Yaz had to say the beach. Yaz thinks the Doctor knew all this and let her choose anyway, and adores her even more for it. 

They’re walking the length of the shore. This beach isn’t shingle like last time but sand, vast expanses of it washed glassy with water and worn smooth with the winter wind. There are, as there always have been and will be on beaches, some wild youngins dashing about in the shallows, shrieking as the white horses break on them with freezing fervour. Apart from that, the beach is quiet. The Doctor is quiet too.

Yaz looks over to her, seeing the soft curves of the Doctor’s shoulder blades usually hidden by her coat. Her collar bone pokes out of her t-shirt, her hair flapping idly by it in the wind, starting to go wavy in the salt air. Yaz can do best friends. She’s almost perfected it. The air between them is clear and they both know where they stand, bouncing out to sea with the stone the Doctor wished on and sent skimming. Always waiting for the final splash. And still, and still, Yaz is left remembering the words the Doctor said all those years ago: like hope, love abides.

“What you said, Doctor, about living in the present while we still have it,” Yaz starts. “Last time we were on a beach.”

The Doctor stiffens almost imperceptibly; if it were anyone else Yaz could’ve put it down to a gust of wind or the growing chill. But this is the Doctor, Yaz’s one constant in all of time and space, and she’s learned by now how to translate the single alien language the TARDIS can’t. The Doctor’s smallest movements have a tendency to betray her. 

Yaz braves on. “Well—we’re time travellers, everything is the present to us.”

The Doctor looks at her. “You think?”

“Why not?”

“I’ve just never thought of it like that before,” the Doctor says, slowly, like Yaz’s words are still seeping into her brain and she needs the time to make sense of them.

“How do you see it, then?”

The Doctor looks at Yaz as if it’s the most obvious thing in the world. “Like everything is ending all of the time.”

Yaz’s breath leaves her. All the adventure, all the discovery, every sunrise they’ve watched together, and the Doctor sees every moment like it’s their last. No wonder she thinks their time together is always running out. No wonder she wished this could go on forever.

Yaz fixes a smile back on her face. Over the years, she’s found the Doctor is a lot more receptive to advice when it’s given with an innocent grin. She’s not sure why that is, if the Doctor doesn’t realise it’s advice if she gives it that way, or even if Yaz’s smiles make the Doctor feel as helpless as the Doctor’s smiles make Yaz. But it works. “Maybe that’s why the TARDIS always takes you somewhere unexpected. She’s trying to tell you you’re wrong. Every time you step out of those blue doors, something new begins.”

“Yasmin Khan, the great philosopher,” the Doctor grins. “You’re wise beyond your years, you are.”

“That’s why we get on, we meet in the middle,” Yaz chuckles.

“Are you calling me immature?”

“No, I’m fondly teasing you about your childlike wonder at the world.”

The Doctor narrows her eyes pointedly at Yaz, the smile dancing on her lips the giveaway to her faux suspicion. “I’ll let you get away with that,” she says eventually, earning a laugh.

They’ve made it all the way down to the sea now. It’s a good job Yaz wore her Docs, as every few waves a gust brings the water right in over their feet. The Doctor’s coat flaps unfamiliarly around Yaz’s calves and she wraps it around herself a little tighter. Its scent brings her as much comfort as her childhood bedroom. 

Beside her, the Doctor seems unbothered by the cold. Maybe she wasn’t lying when she said temperature works differently for her. The wind is running breezy fingers through her wavy hair; through the strands, the Doctor catches Yaz staring and Yaz glances back down to the sand. When the Doctor shifts her feet, sea water pools in the prints her boots leaves behind, just briefly, before the sand shifts in the current’s flow and it’s like she was never stood there. 

“I waited for you,” Yaz says, staring at the ephemeral shifting of the tide. “For three years.”

The Doctor clears her throat a little awkwardly. “You never gave up hope?”

“Course I did. Three years is a long time, especially without you,” Yaz states bluntly. It’s not a confession, it’s a fact. “I missed you.” 

“I’m sorry.”

She shakes her head, she’s going about it wrong. “I’m not saying it to make you feel guilty, I’m just saying. I lived in the present then, having lost you, and being with you again… Maybe some things are worth it. Stars, maybe some things aren’t worth it and we should do them anyway,” she tries, slightly breathlessly.

The Doctor does what she does best and looks out to sea, the unfathomable emotions of an immortal alien locked behind her brow. Her body language, Yaz has learned to translate, but her thoughts she never can quite get a grip on. 

Even when it’s quiet between them, it’s rarely silent. The rhythms of the wave on the shore, the humming of the TARDIS engines, the triple beating of their hearts. The three years that Yaz spent without the Doctor, those were silent. But they were full of longing.

“Even when the hope was gone, I never stopped loving you,” she says, and that is a confession. Or the closest thing you can get to one when the woman you’re confessing to already knows it all. But she’s not asking for anything, just saying it because it needs to be said.

“Yaz…” The Doctor turns to her and looks back away, swallows, words still in her throat. “I never was any good at saying the important things. Just know—” the Doctor finally turns to face her properly, their bodies parallel to the shore. She’s found a smile, the kind which Yaz can hear deep in her voice and sounds like contentment. “Being with you makes me love being me. I’ve been so many people, but I’m the luckiest of all of them. I’m so glad it was me who met you.”

Yaz feels her cheeks dimple. “Me too. I wouldn't have it any other way.”

“Even if—”

“Even if.” Yaz finishes it for her. “I’ll take what you can give me. And maybe steal a little more,” she says with a smile. She presses a kiss, soft and chaste, to the Doctor’s warm cheek; feels the downy hairs of her skin and the wrinkles of her crow’s feet against her lips. It’s a quick and flighty thing, an innocent toe over the line the Doctor drew in the sand on that beach in 1807.

“Thieves take,” the Doctor murmurs. “That felt more like a gift.”

“A present,” Yaz says. Then, a little more shyly, “I’m giving you my present.”

The Doctor’s eyes are wide and brown and almost doubting as she stares at Yaz.

Trust in me, Yaz wants to say, but can’t quite get the words out. 

In the end, it seems she doesn’t need to. The doubt in the Doctor’s eyes thaws, resolving itself into something sweeter, more steadfast. Her hand finds Yaz’s under the too-long sleeves of her own coat. The Time Lord’s skin is warm and soft as her fingers slip between Yaz’s own, the double heat of their palms glowing amid the cold of the beach the TARDIS brought them to. Scarborough Fair and 1303 can wait; they’re time travellers. The Doctor smiles at Yaz, and Yaz smiles at the Doctor, and even as the waves of the beach break frostily on, the connection between them is remade anew.

[doctorbrown]

DOCTOBER '24 ⸺ 「 2 / 31 * JULES VERNE 」

August, 1932

“Be careful, Emmett!” Sarah shouts after her son's back as he races toward the far edge of their property. “If you start feeling tired, come inside–I’ll have refreshments for you.”

“Okay, mother!” he shouts back, never once looking over his shoulder. 

With a fond sigh and all the confidence in the world her son will, at the very least, limit whatever trouble he gets into to their property line, she disappears back into the house, but not so soon that she almost misses Emmett trip over something unseen and spill the strange assortment of items clutched in his arms all over the yard. 

Not even the blistering summer sun and the light sheen of sweat already beading on Emmett's face could dampen the excitement running through his veins. 

Halfway into their sizeable backyard, Emmett finally stops, drops to his knees, and sets everything down in his arms with the utmost care, protecting each piece of his critically important equipment so as not to damage them before he could even begin.

The most important piece of equipment, a crude digging apparatus fashioned out of a number of different household utensils–his mother had been most displeased at the crime scene that was their dining room table several weeks ago, taken aback by the sight of Emmett surrounded by numerous broken pieces of kitchen equipment and other spare parts–was given a fond look before he set it down in the grass beside his compass.

The small pack he’d slung over one shoulder follows next, and Emmett opens it up, rifling through the contents inside until he pulls out a small lantern–borrowed without his father’s knowledge from the garage–and a large piece of paper, folded neatly into quarters, albeit wrinkled and yellowed slightly and torn at the edges. 

Reverently, as if it contained all of the secrets of the universe within the fibres of its page, Emmett unfolds it, grinning from ear-to-ear. He’d spent weeks looking at maps, going over every inch of their property to recreate their home in exacting detail, puzzling out how to hide the beginnings of his descent from his father so he couldn’t put a stop to his expedition before it even began–it would all be worth it to see the wonders of the past hidden just beneath their feet, slumbering, untouched by time and human progression and even Father couldn’t deny that once he saw it for himself!–and listing out all the necessary preparations he’d need once he made it down there.

Now, everything was in order, and like Professor Lidenbrock and Axel, he, too, would be made privy to the secrets lying in wait deep down in the depths of the planet.

Emmett checks the map, repositions himself and his equipment so he’s in the proper marked off starting point–a circle drawn onto the grass matching that indicated on his map–and grabs his tools, undaunted by the Herculean task that awaits him.

It’ll all be worth it–they’ll see!

He isn’t sure how long he keeps at it–in this heat and by the exhaustion that creeps its way into his muscles, it feels like hours, but the sun is still high and brutal–but his progress toward the untold mysteries lying in wait at the centre of the earth is pathetic at best. Panting from the exertion and wiping sweat from his brow, Emmett flops onto the ground, staring at the barely forearm-deep hole he’s managed to carve out. 

The Professor and his nephew had the benefit of descending down an inactive volcano. Had there been any of those closer to Hill Valley, his own journey may have been that much easier, but convincing his parents–even his mother, who encouraged his passions and proclivities behind his father’s back–would have been near impossible, shut down the moment the words left his lips for being worthless drivel.

Another of his flights of fancy pulling him away from being a good, respectable man in his father’s eyes.

Emmett looks at the digging apparatus earning a much deserved rest on the grass by his legs and purses his lips thoughtfully. Perhaps the kitchen knives weren’t long enough, weren’t suited for the task–if he reworked the design, surely he could come up with something better now that he was in possession of this new insight, gleaned only through trial-and-error. 

Next time, he’d make something better. Next time, he’d—

“Emmett, honey, gather up your things and come inside!”

@bttfdoctober

[roadtogracelandx45]

Courage Under Fire| Currahee part 3| Band of Brothers

Currahee part 2

masterlist

@marycorleone @ohnoitsthebat @prettyinpayne

Currahee part 3

August-September 1942

*Because part of me is selfish and wants to add more to what we see in the show, I am kind of doing things a little out of order*

A lot of the girls were struggling with the obstacle course, PT, and running the hill, no more so than Adele Rogers, the soft-spoken girl from Seattle, Washington, she was a little shorter than the other girls and had to jump up to get into the tunnels and then up to the wall. 

But Olivia insisted that they stayed together and worked through it and in turn, her twin brother Bobby, Floyd Talbert, and Joseph Liebgott dropped back to help them out. At first, Adele thought it was because Bobby didn't want to see his sister,  especially fail and because Liebgott was sweet on Olivia having witnessed the flirting between the two when they weren't under the watchful eye of Sobel and Bobby and Floyd who were trying to stop it. 

But then she started to realize that unlike Sobel, Bill Evans, and Roy Cobb, one of the privates in the first platoon, most of these boys had their best interests at heart, even if it was for their own selfish needs. Talbert was open to admitting that often flirted with Olivia, Daisy, and Lily. The latter of the trio blushed wildly and stammered through conversations. He was often scolded by Olivia for teasing the poor girl. 

Unlike the rest of them, Lily, who was in Dog Company with Edward Stewart and Ronald Speirs, wasn’t used to being surrounded by men, even loud friendly ones. From what they were able to piece together was that Lily’s father was abusive and beat the poor girl down until she was nothing, the call from the Nursing Corp came at a good time, like Katherine, Olivia’s mother, Lily’s father, Arthur was going to force Lily to marry someone who was old enough to be her father. She had run, changing her name and never looking back. 

They had all respected that. She thought that was part of the reason why the mysterious Speirs took a liking to Lily and took her under his wing.

“Come on Addie.” Olivia’s voice shook her out of her thoughts and she looked at the girl who had come back to her side, her green eyes dancing in amusement, “We need to get over the wall and Sobel is watching.” 

Adele cringed, “Isn’t he always watching though, almost creepily?” 

 The answering unladylike snort that came from Olivia was answer enough for her. It was almost uncomfortable the way Sobel stared and leered at them, so much so that none of them wanted to be in the same room with him without another nurse or one of the boys with them. Thankfully, he hadn’t escalated yet and tried anything with them. 

“I don’t know how I am going to get over that freaking wall.’ She changed the subject as she followed her toward the tunnels. “Get a running start.” Bobby offered up, “Bean, go first. I will stay”

 “Yeah, c’mon Princess. Race ya. Loser buys drinks next time we get a pass.’ Liebgott offered up. 

“Yeah,” Olivia laughed, “Sure if Malarkey or Frank don’t get our passes revoked.” 

In the month they had been at Toccoa they hadn't been able to have a pass because of little things that Sobel found to be not up to snuff. It drove them all crazy. Honestly, she was already sick and tired of hearing about the boys not getting laid. At first, it had surprised her how quickly they forgot about the social norms. But there was really nothing she could do other than being or trying to be a sympathetic ear. 

Adele looked at the older twin quickly checking if he was okay with his friend openly asking his sister out. To her surprise, he just shook his head, he must have figured that they were both going to do whatever they wanted. They were in the middle of war and life was going to be short, who was he to stop them?  After everything his sister had been through with Katherine and taking care of Fredrick, she deserved a little fun. As much as he hated it. 

**

“Stop Joe! You cheated!” Olivia laughed as they both came to a stop at the end of the course, for the most part, he had stayed close by her until the end when he took off running, causing her to curse and chase after him. 

Still laughing he shrugged his shoulders, took steps forward, and slung his arm around her shoulders pulling her back to him. He could enjoy seeing the light blush covering her cheeks. He resisted pressing a kiss against her cheek before turning so they were facing the group that was still making their way towards the end of the course. 

“I will still pay for drinks.” He muttered lowly in her ear. “On one condition.” “What’s that?” She prodded before yelling out encouragement to Adele. “It's just the two of us. No Bobby, no Floyd. Just us.” 

Pursing her lips, she thought for a minute before nodding her head in agreement, “Fine. Yeah! Addie!” Adele had pulled herself up and over the wall and had a triumphant smile on her face. Bobby who had come over the wall behind her grabbed her by the waist and hoisted her up. Causing her to shout with laughter.  

"Sometimes," Joe's voice was low in her ear, as he clapped his hands in encouragement, "All it takes is the right kind of encouragement." 

"Is that so?" She returned as Adele tore across the opening and into her Lieutenant's arms, causing Joe to snicker and move his arm from her shoulders to her waist to hold her up so they wouldn't tumble to the ground. He wanted to admit that the thought of taking her out on the weekend pass was the encouragement he needed. But at the same time, he wasn't sure that he was ready to settle at all. Olivia was a girl who needed a boyfriend, not a bootcamp fling.

**

"Excuse me, Lieutenant Sobel." Amber started seeing the flat-footed man outside of the officer's barracks, everyone else was heading out to dinner in the mess hall a couple of hours later. He turned to face her, a sneer forming on his face. The hatred and distaste he had for the women were growing stronger with each day that passed. "I think I have a way of getting Olivia Stewart out of both of our hairs." Sobel paused, he could hear Olivia's laughter coming from down the pathway, Bill Guarnere had gathered her up in his arms dipping her down to the ground, and proceeded to rain kisses all over her face.

"I am listening." He started folding his arms, he was tired of not being able to do anything about the nurses. But if one of their own was willing to do something about it, he was going to take full advantage of it.

**

"Bill, stop,  you are embarrassing yourself!' Olivia laughed as he raised her back upright, his hand lingering on hers. "Me? Never." He laughed before releasing her hand, she had scolded him about the flirting and how he should focus more on Evie than her, and how they could get removed from the program.

 Evie joined the Army Nursing  Corps to be with Bill, not because she wanted to make a difference. She wanted the relationship with Bill where Olivia found herself moving further and further away from her childhood sweetheart and more towards someone like Lewis or even Joe Liebgott, who over the last week or so she had started forming a friendship with.

She gave him a pointed look and then glanced at Evie.

"You know," Talbert commented, settling his arm around her shoulders, they had all heard the shouting match that the two had gotten into after he had seen her and Nixon wander off together to talk, "We would pay big bucks to see you two together." His dark eyes darted to Evie then back to Olivia who glowered at him.

"In your dreams pal."

"Only every night babe." He returned, causing her to roll her eyes and smack her hand against his chest.

"You are a pig." He offered a cheeky smile followed by a loud smacking kiss against her cheek before letting her slip away from him. "Just the girl I was looking for.' Sobel's nasally voice came from down the pathway causing everyone to deflate and roll their eyes and Olivia to stiffen.

 Bobby took a step forward ready to pounce on the man if need be. She had come to him the night before near tears about how Sobel was making them uncomfortable and as much as she was playing it off like everything was fine, it wasn't.

 'After the night march tonight, you and Cobb are going to be on guard duty."

"Yes, sir." She flattered, she had dreaded spending time with Cobb after the advances he tried on her and the other girls. But if she had to do it, she had to do it.

 "Don't worry Liv, we are on right after." Bobby muttered darkly, normally the duties were two or three hours at a time, "We will make sure nothing happens to you."

 "If worst comes to worst." Floyd added, "Stab him with your scissors."

"Gladly." There was a small twisted smirk forming on her face. As much as her oldest brother claimed her innocence, there was something about her that could be downright evil. It made her twin brother proud. 

Cobb, who had been within the ranks of the 3rd platoon came up to the group smirking, “Olivia.” “It’s Lieutenant Stewart.’ Bobby corrected, and while Olivia was okay with most of the men and permitted them to call her by her first name, she still had every right to be called by her rank, which she rightfully earned. 

Cobb rolled his eyes, “She isn’t my Lieutenant.” “She is a Lieutenant.” Talbert threw in before the tempers that Liebgott and Bobby had flared, “And she does deserve your respect. She worked just as hard as the other Lieutenants.” Her hand caught his and squeezed it in thanks as Liebgott led her into the mess hall, out of the line of the fire.  

“Oh come on, Talbert, the only reason why you pretend to respect her is because you want in her pants.” The blonde man complained, “I mean, I don’t blame you, I want to fuck her too.” 

A heavy hand dropped onto his shoulder, and he turned his head to meet the fiery blue eyes of Robert Stewart. And his heart dropped to his stomach. “Roy, let’s go have a chat before we go to dinner.”  

***

Olivia stifled her yawn behind her hand as they marched, she was sandwiched in between Talbert and Liebgott. Every Friday night since they had been there and their passes were revoked they had marched and each march grew longer. They were now at 12 miles, in the pitch dark, full packs and dead silence.

The silence that all the girls hated.

Especially Olivia who was used to the constant noise of the old houses settling or of siblings fighting or over-talking each other to be heard. Only tonight was different, she had heard Pat Christenson coughing and dropped back to check on him and told him to drink the water. That they were forbidden to drink from, he was fighting a mild cold and slight dehydration and Olivia wasn't going to let anything serious happen to him. They had all come too far with this for someone to drop out because of an illness.

“ Lieutenant.” He offered, he knew that there would be hell to pay when Sobel found out that he drank from his canteen. But he wanted to listen to Olivia, she was like Winters and Nixon, and she seemed to know what she was doing. And if he remembered correctly, Bobby told them stories about how his twin was constantly talking about how she patched him and the older brothers and younger sister up. 

"I will handle Sobel." She said firmly, a determined twinkle in her eye before returning to her place between Talbert and Liebgott.

"I hope you know what you are doing Princess," Joe whispered.

"I always know what I am doing.' He glanced over her head at Talbert who smirked and shook his head. She was going to cause a mess of trouble, there was no doubt in his mind. But he would do anything he could to pull her out of it.

"Lieutenant Winters." Bull Randleman's voice came from in front of her causing her to perk up causing the two men on either side of her to laugh.

"What is it?'

"Permission to speak sir."

"Permission granted.' Winters returned, Olivia didn't need to see his face to know that he was amused, she could count on one hand how many times she had seen that man amused. This was a rare treat.

"We have 9 other companies sir, why is it we are the only ones that are out here marching 12 miles in the pitch dark with a full pack." 

"Why do you think Private Randleman?" 

"Lieutenant Sobel hates us, sir." "Lieutenant Sobel doesn't hate Easy Company, he just hates you." There was scattered laughter through the ranks.

"Thank  you, sir."

"He hates you too, Muck.' Talbert teased knocking his knuckles against Skip's helmet causing Olivia to laugh softly and shake her head. 

"Amber is the only one he likes other than Evans." Adele's voice floated forward. Amber was the only nurse not marching with them that night. 

"Why do you think that?" Olivia returned curiously, they all had their theories on what was going on, and she had rushed whispered conversations with Lewis and Dick about theirs when they could have them. 

"Well." The girl paused, trying to find the right words that wouldn't embarrass herself or

 the other girls. "I kind of walked in on them the other night."

"Easy Liv!' Chuck Grant exclaimed as he bumped into her, she had stopped dead in her tracks at the statement.

"Sorry Chuck." She said before moving forward again, falling back into step with Liebgott and Talbert, "What were they doing Addie?"

 "You know."

 "No, we don't sweets." Liebgott called, earning a slap on the chest from Olivia, causing him to catch it and hold it against his heart, "You wound me, princess.' His heart flipped in his chest when he saw the bright dimpled smile on her face. 

"You know it."

"Sex." Bobby filled in, his amusement clear in his voice.

"Aw! Gross! Bobby!" Repeated complaints filled the air at that. 

"I really, really didn't need that image in my head," Alice complained from where she was near the front with Bull and Johnny. 

"Me either." The other 3 nurses agreed, pulling faces. All thankful that it was dark enough to where the men couldn't see how horrified they all were.

"Where is Lewis when I need him?" Olivia muttered, "He has whiskey." Trying to drown the image out of her head was going to be the best option.

"There is one way to get the image out of your head." Talbert started as they turned to go line up in front of the barracks, "Creating your own images. We will be happy to help you with that."

All the blood rushed to her face and neck and she was thankful that her uniform and too-big helmet covered it, the last thing that she needed was to be teased again, Lewis did that enough. 

"Oh, um, I, uh." She stammered, she had only really had Lewis tease her like that before having a man who was a near stranger say that was shocking. Her shock was saved by Sobel, Evans, and Amber appearing.  

The latter smirked at her CO's misfortunate having to march with the men and the other nurses. Olivia, who pulled herself away from the 1st platoon made her way up to the front, to stand next to Dick, like she had been told to. Lewis, Peacock, and Shames joined them seconds later.

"Liv? You good?" Lewis asked lowly, he could see the faint red tinge on her cheeks and wondered what he had missed by being further back.

"Later, Lew, later." She muttered.

"Lieutenant Winters, canteens out and open," Sobel ordered, his beady eyes going over all of the company. "Canteens out and open," Dick ordered not risking to look back at the other officers, he knew the moment he made eye contact with Olivia, one of them was going to

 break and it was probably going to be her. And they didn't need to have a scene caused right then.

Sobel gave the command to pour and started going up and down the rows of men looking for one of them to mess up so he could have them repeat the march.

 "Who is this?" He had found his target, Pat Christenson. "Private Christenson. Were you told not to drink on the Friday night march?"

 "Yes, sir." "You disobeyed a direct order. Lieutenant Winters."

"Lieutenant Sobel." Olivia's voice cut over his command causing everyone to freeze, no one actually cut him off before, they had all thought about it and never did it, "I told him to drink sir.'  

"What gives you the right?" Sobel spat, spinning around to face her. 

"My rank in the Nursing Corp sir, it is my responsibility to make sure these men are healthy

 enough to go into battle. And Private Christenson is sick." The man's hands formed fists and he stalked towards her. 

"He wasn't healthy. So I made a call." Her eyes dropped down to his fists, "What are you going to do with those fists Lieutenant Sobel?"

"Oh don't do it Liv," Lewis muttered, he knew that she could drop the fact that her godfather was the General over the parachute infantry. He was even over General Taylor, with whom they were all familiar. Her saying anything about that would make it five times worse for her and for Bobby. 

But Sobel seemed not to put two and two together and it was almost like a game to see when Sobel was going to figure it out.

 If he did. 

Realizing that Winters, Nixon, and several others were inching closer to where they were standing, Sobel loosened his fist and stepped away. "Both of you refill your canteens and repeat the 12-mile march now! Fall out!" He finally spat. “Yes sir.” The two parroted back and Olivia smirked as she passed Lewis and the others. She had known exactly what she was doing when she had told him to drink, she knew that she couldn’t do 2 hours alone with Cobb on guard duty. He was still smarting from the ass beating he got from Bobby, there was no telling what he would do to her. Olivia had been quick to put two and two together when her brother came into the mess hall with bloody knuckles. The rest of the boys had been quick to start teasing Bobby once Olivia scolded him and started cleaning up the blood knuckles. Then she turned her attention to them, lecturing them too, which amused her brother and Nixon greatly. 

 **

“You didn’t have to do that, Lieutenant.” Pat finally said as they started back out on the march. “It’s Olivia please.” She waved her hand, “And yes I did. Sobel thinks he can bully everyone and anyone he thinks is below him, including the women. But I am not going to let him.”

 He was silent waiting for her to go on, it seemed like as quiet as she seemed she had a lot to say about Sobel. 

“Y’all worked too hard for him to f-” she caught herself from swearing, if it was Lewis, Bobby, or Bill she would have been more open to cursing, “mess it up. I think the best thing that we can do is rise above his crap and prove we are the best. You boys have Winters, Nixon, Keihn, Peacock, and Shames, they outweigh everything that he has done wrong.”  

“We also have you Olivia.’ He cut in, “and the other girls. We all work extra hard to impress you.”  He was awarded with a bright smile from her. Something that only was granted to her twin, Bill, and from what he had seen Winters, Nixon, Talbert, and Liebgott. 

“You lot are a bunch of flirts you know that?” 

 He laughed before shifting the machine gun on his shoulder again, they all knew it, it had started being a competition between them to see who could get to one of the nurses first. Olivia because of her rank and the fact that she was one of their own’s twin sister was out of it. 

"So are you though, you flirt with  Lieutenant Nixon.” 

‘Honey, there is more to the story with me and Nix than y’all know. I am sure you know that I dated Bill right?” Her eyes were on the path in front of them. “We heard, your brother is very vocal about his displeasure with Bill and his relationship with Jenkins. We also heard you slapped both of them.” 

“I did, it happened right before we left to go back to Charleston. Frederick, our great-great grandfather was on death’s door and wanted me to go out and take care of him.” She started, her fingers catching the strap of her medical bag, “I reminded him a lot of his daughter Lydia who was killed during the Civil War.” 

‘And where you go, Bobby goes.”  They had all seen it, Bobby was fiercely overprotective of his sister, and her going to OCS and then to Meade was the longest they had been separated. “Bingo.” She laughed using her free hand to push her helmet up, “I hadn’t made up my mind to go back until then and I think my grandfather and great uncle Finn knew that so Finn was already on his way down from DC to get us.” 

“Wait, is Uncle Finn, General Finnigan Stewart?” 

“You catch on quick Pat. Yes, he is mine and Bobby’s godfather, but we don’t want that to go around too much. I already got enough crap at OCS for it.”  He made a motion like he was zipping his lips causing her to laugh softly before carrying on with her story. 

**

Once the anger cleared and they returned to their barracks,  Sobel realized that Olivia had gotten out of guard duty with Cobb and he had to figure out a way to get to her. “Son of a bitch!’ Sobel cursed, throwing his jacket onto his footlocker. 

“Sir?” Evans asked as he shut the door to their barracks. Much like Winters and Nixon, they shared a two-man barracks which was kiddie corner from the nurses' barracks. Evans knew from watching Sobel that he just had to angle just perfectly on the two steps that were attached to the building, you could see into the small window that was on the nurse’s barracks door. “She got out of guard duty with Cobb.” 

“Maybe it’s for the best, sir,” Evans started almost thoughtfully, “we shouldn’t be messing with them too much. The men are much more agreeable when they are around. And,” he paused, he like some of the others put two and two together with the Stewart last name and the general in charge of them being a Stewart too. “And what?” He spat angrily, he couldn’t believe that Evans wasn’t backing him like he thought he would. 

“It’s nothing, never mind.”  He returned, Sobel was digging his own grave and he was going to have to lie in it. 

*** 

“Hey.” Lewis laughed seeing the head nurse coming into the mess hall, dark circles ringing her eyes and shoulders slumped, “There’s our girl.”

 ‘Good morning.” She returned with a yawn, she had gotten back to the barracks a few hours before and tossed and turned before having to get up for the day. 

“Is Christenson okay?” Dick asked as she joined them at their table, she pushed the plate of slop that she had gotten to the center of the table and opted to pick up her coffee mug. “He is fine now. Betsy is checking on him right now.” She returned, ‘I think it was just a cold and stress from being with Sobel 24/7.”  

Raising an eyebrow, Dick pushed the slop back towards her, he knew that they were all stressed and if OCS was anything to go off of, Olivia was stressed out and when she was stressed she snapped a lot more and didn’t eat. And when that happened, Olivia got super angry and was more than likely to snap.  She frowned and picked up her fork. “Can’t be any worse than what Katherine made.”  Lewis teased nudging her with his elbow. “That’s funny, that you think she cooked Lewis.”  She laughed, 'Everything I learned, I learned from Andie, and thank god for that.” She paused taking a sip of her coffee, ‘Do you think what Addie said last night was true about Amber and Sobel?”  “What about them?” Lewis asked looking between the two, Neither one of them had said much of anything after the confrontation the night before. “Supposedly, they are having sex.” The tips of Dick’s ears went red and a pink tinge covered Olivia’s cheeks as she answered. ‘If it is true, you can go to Sink and get Amber sent home.” Lewis mused, but Olivia quickly shook her head, “No, that is the easy way out for her, and after everything she has put me through so far. “ She shook her head, there was a part of her,  that yes wanted to ruin Amber’s life but the other part wanted to ruin her bit by bit. It was just going to be a waiting game to see who would win out.

**

“Don’t think I don’t know what you were doing Olivia,” Sobel commented later that morning when she came up onto the mock airplane to practice their practice jumps, he had just snapped at Smokey Gordon who broke his legs. And now Olivia was standing in front of him.

“I am sure, I don’t know what you are talking about sir.” Olivia returned innocently, “I am just doing my job, just like you are.” There was a choked cough from behind her and Sobel turned his glare to her brother who was standing behind her waiting for his turn. “Yes, you do.’ He sputtered, stopping from cursing at her. “Lieutenant Sobel, I think you need to get out of the heat. Heat exhaustion is a dangerous thing. Excuse me.”  He gaped at her as she stepped into the opening, her eyes glanced down at the sand. 

This part was easy, it was the actual jumping out of the plane that was scaring her. Taking a deep breath, she counted 1,000, 2,000, 3,000 like the others before as she jumped off the platform. Unlike Gordon who went before her, she landed on her knees and threw her hands out to catch herself. 

“Ow.” She muttered as she stood up to brush herself off before turning to look up at the platform again. Her brother had caught her eye and offered a smile and a thumbs up. He had pushed himself forward and butted in front of the others so he could be close to his sister, he knew how much flying and going out of the plane terrified her. When she found out that James was becoming a pilot, she prayed every single day and Bobby was sure she still did even though he had been gone for several months. 

“You know something.” Amber started, she had been standing waiting for the rest of the nurses to finish so they could go into their classroom lecture. “Don't start Amber, I am not in the mood.’ Olivia ordered, it was short and clipped something she wasn’t used to, she was starting to sound more and more like her mother and she hated it. Amber squared her shoulders and took a step forward so she was standing closer to her. 

Causing her to take a step back, glowering angrily, “I am warning you, Sargent, back off.” Amber smirked and took another step forward, “You have no control here, Olivia. Lieutenant Sobel is in charge and he likes me over you.” “And that’s completely fine for you Amber.” Olivia returned, “You should start thinking about settling down. I mean a girl your age,” Out of all the girls, Amber was the oldest at 24 while Olivia and the others ranged between 18-22 years old. “Should start thinking about settling down. And Lieutenant Sobel is perfect for that. And for you.” Amber’s hand twitched like she wanted to slap her but she knew that if she did, she would be out of the program and Olivia would win. 

That was the last thing that she wanted.  

[dumbass-tumbler-cryptid]

It took Quaritch 10 years to build the cabin and immediately after finishing it he went to get Spider or did he finish it earlier but he was waiting for the perfect moment to take him?Will there be a fragment describing exactly how the construction took place? I wonder how he found the place at all, whether he make all the furniture himself and how he moved everything up the hill

<3

I mention the construction of the cabin in a few lines here and there but I never have like, an in depth flashback scene of the process of building it, but I do have the whole process thought out so let's get into it.

So the cabin is on a secluded mountain in Colorado. Originally Spider lived in the D.C area so Quaritch took him completely across the country. Quaritch had a general idea of where he wanted to go when he first started thinking up his plan. He wanted a place that was secluded, hard to reach, and with plenty of natural resources so they could live off the land. He would have gone through a list to narrow down other locations until settling on the mountain the cabin is on and then actually going there to make sure it was as secluded and hard to reach as he originally thought. That process alone would have taken about a year as he thoroughly considered and tested every option.

Once he found the perfect spot he'd started construction using pretty basic tools, things he could easily carry up the mountain. He'd have to clear a lot of large trees first, saving them to use as construction material later, then dig up the tree stumps so he could level the ground. The cabin does have a basement, a septic system, and a water well so he'd have to dig, using small explosives to make the initial holes then shaping it how he wants. He'd use the dug up stone from this to make concrete that would be used to make the foundation of the house. Then he'd actually start building the house from the trees from earlier. Once the cabin is done, the plumbing is set up, and the electrical wiring is done (but not functional yet) he'd start making a good amount of the furniture, bed frames, desks, wardrobes, dressers, end tables, kitchen table, chairs all of that stuff. He'd also be starting their garden around this time because it takes years to actually cultivate the soil to grow good crops so he'd have to start that years in advanced to make sure they have a good source of food for when him and Spider will be living there.

This would all be a very long process made longer by his lack of heavy duty power tools and help. His team would come up to help him a few weeks at a time but they all have lives too that they can't be away from for that long without arousing suspicion and no one wants that. He'd also only be able to really work on this from mid spring to mid fall which is still a good amount of working time each year, but he wouldn't want to be away from Spider for that long. So he's in D.C watching Spider from late august when school starts to about Spider's spring break then heads back to work on the cabin.

Quaritch would take up as much as he could with every trip, so like first it'd be all the tools he needs for building and supplies he needs for surviving in the woods for months. He'd leave it all there in a safe place, so that next time he could start bringing up gardening supplies, then family photos/videos and so on. All the big stuff like the couch, mattresses, fridge, stove, etc. where airlifted there by Brown. Every member of team deja blue that could be there was there to quickly unload everything so Brown could fly away fast, then they moved everything into the house. That all happened a few months before Spider was taken so yeah he didn't waste much time. Spider was kidnapped at the end of august. Quaritch probably had everything airlifted in during the spring, took some time to get the house in order, arranging everything how he wanted, trying to make it feel homie, double checking that everything is in order, that there solar panels work, the backup generator works, the radio system he uses to talk to his squad, the water filtration system all in perfect order. Then triple checking that the basement is well stocked with enough non perishable food, water, medical supplies, and personal care items to last them both for the next decade.

Once he's 100% sure everything is perfect he goes back to D.C to watch Spider, study his routine, and fine tune his plan so he can take his son back without a single issue.

I hope that covered everything! I'm happy to answer anymore questions you might have if I missed something 💞

[starstwinkleplanetsshine]

Daughter of the Sea

Chapter Twenty-Four: The Beginning of the End (Read on AO3 here)

August 1st came. Seventeen days until our sixteenth birthday. 

And then the 8th. Ten days. 

The whole camp seemed to vibrate at ever-higher frequencies, everyone’s fingers on a hairpin trigger. Campers wore their armor from the time they woke up to the time they fell asleep, their weapons always by their side. People made confessions of love, asked for forgiveness for past offenses (except for the Apollo/Ares feud going on), and gave longer hugs. We all knew our days were numbered, and sooner than we would like, the final battle would come, and nothing would ever be the same. 

The end of the world started when my brother walked out of the Long Island sound onto the deserted beach. 

Deserted, except for me. 

“Percy!” I squealed as I rushed forward and flung my arms around him. I had a strange feeling about an hour before that I needed to go to the beach, that my brother would return that afternoon. I had learned to listen to my twin intuition, it usually never let me down. 

I could tell something was very, very wrong as soon as I saw him. He stood still as I hugged him, his arms limp at his side. When I pulled away to look at him, his face was sullen and his eyes were puffy. A sinking feeling filled my chest. 

“Oh gods, Percy. Did…” 

He shook his head. I stepped away. 

“I’m so sorry.” 

“The mission was a success. We blew up the ship. But Beckendorf—” his voice broke, but he gathered himself, "Beckendorf didn’t make it off in time. I couldn’t save him.” 

“He knew the risks.” I didn’t know what else I could say. “He’s a hero.” 

Percy’s face was as hard as stone. 

“I saw dad.” He said flatly. “I saw his Kingdom. His palace.” I fought back a pang of jealousy. “The war down there is pretty bad, they’re not doing well. Oceanus is getting closer and closer, and I’m not sure how much longer—” 

The sound of a conch shell rang out across the sand. 

“Shit.” Percy breathed out. Our reunion was about to be crashed. “Who’s on lookout?” 

“Connor.” I said, glancing back at the tree I knew the Stool brother was hiding in. Sure enough, he was climbing down it and quickly clambering over the sand dunes. He would be at our side in no time. 

“I’ll fill you in later.” He looked back at the water and rubbed his eyes. “Ange?” 

“Yeah?” 

“I’m glad you’re the first person I saw.” 

I gave him a weak smile and placed my hand on his arm. Thankfully, he didn’t pull away. 

The dark-haired son of Hermes was by our side quickly, wearing his usual crooked grin and bounding excitedly. 

“Percy!” he yelled. “What happened? Where’s Beckendorf?” And then he saw Percy's dark expression, and his smile melted. "Oh, no. Poor Silena. Holy Zeus, when she finds out . . ."

“Let’s get Percy to the Big House.” I interrupted, and Connor nodded, seeming to get the message. We climbed the sand dunes together, and soon enough we could see campers about a hundred yards away, running up to us excitedly. By the time we made it to the dining pavilion, Percy stopped walking and faced the throng streaming toward us. 

“No use trying to hide anything.” He said, his voice burdened. 

As I waited for the crowd to reach us, I looked out across the valley and thought about what Camp looked like when I first saw it, what felt like a thousand years ago. 

From the dining pavilion, you could see pretty much everything. Hills ringed the valley. On the tallest, Half-Blood Hill, what once was Thalia's pine tree stood with the Golden Fleece hanging from its branches, magically protecting the camp from its enemies. I thought of the stories Percy told me about how they retrieved it. The guard dragon Peleus was so big now I could see him from here—curled around the tree trunk, lending up smoke signals as he snored.

To my right spread the woods. To my left, the canoe lake, one of my favorite places at camp, glittered and the climbing wall glowed from the lava pouring down its side. Twelve cabins—one for each Olympian god—made a horseshoe pattern around the commons area. Farther south were the strawberry fields, the armory, and the four-story Big House with its sky blue paint job and its bronze eagle weathervane.

I had only been here for a year, and sometimes that fact caught me by surprise. It had all become so normal, this crazy world of monsters and gods that I once thought were just stories but now knew were very, very real. Sometimes it was hard to remember what my life was like before I found out who I really am. 

In some ways, the camp hadn't changed. But you couldn't see the war by looking at the buildings or the fields. You could see it in the faces of the demigods and satyrs and naiads coming up the hill.

There weren't as many at camp as even a year ago, and Percy told me that it was even less than it had been four summers ago, when he arrived. Some had left and never come back. Some had died fighting. Others—though we tried not to talk about them—had gone over to the enemy.

The ones who were still here were battle-hardened and weary. There was little laughter at camp these days. Even the Hermes cabin didn't play so many pranks. It's hard to enjoy practical jokes when your whole life feels like one.

Chiron galloped into the pavilion first as the campers opened a path for him. He had been letting his beard grow out over the summer, and only then did I realize how wild it had gotten. 

"Percy!" he said. "Thank the gods. But where . . ." 

Annabeth ran up right past him and grabbed Percy’s arm, not caring that she interrupted Chiron.

She looked a mess. They were all doing so many combat missions recently, she hardly had any time to think about her appearance, much less trying to look good. Her curly blonde hair was a tangled mess and there were perpetual dark circles under her stormy gray eyes. But even so, I watched as my brother’s eyes lit up as he saw her. I saw the way he stood up a little straighter as she ran towards him. I wondered if the two of them would ever get through a conversation without trying to strangle each other, and if they did, maybe something beautiful could come of it. 

"What happened?" Annabeth grabbed Percy’s arm. "Is Luke—"

"The ship blew up," he said. "He wasn't destroyed. I don't know where—"

Silena Beauregard pushed through the crowd. Her hair wasn't combed and she wasn't even wearing makeup, which hadn’t been weird for Annabeth, but definitely wasn't like the daughter of Aphrodite.

"Where's Charlie?" she demanded, looking around like he might be hiding.

My heart sank, and I saw Percy glance helplessly at Chiron. Annabeth seemed to notice, too, because she started shaking her head, looking at me as she put her hand over her open mouth. 

The old centaur cleared his throat. "Silena, my dear, let's talk about this at the Big House—"

"No," she muttered. "No. No."

She started to cry, and then broke into sobs, and the rest of us stood around, too stunned to speak. The energy in the pavilion dropped from frantic to sullen in a matter of moments, like the air was sucked out of the entire world. We'd already lost so many people over the summer, but this was the worst. With Beckendorf gone, it felt like someone had stolen the anchor for the entire camp.

Finally Clarisse from the Ares cabin came forward. She was dressed in her blood red combat armor, her brown hair tucked into a bandana. She was as big and beefy as a rugby player, with a permanent scowl on her face, but in that moment there was no one else that could’ve comforted Silena. They had one of the strangest, but coolest, friendships at Camp and she put her arm around her, speaking gently. 

"Come on, girl," she said. "Let's get to the Big House. I'll make you some hot chocolate."

Everyone turned and wandered off in twos and threes after that, heading back to the cabins. Nobody was excited to see Percy now. Nobody wanted to hear about the blown-up ship.

Only Annabeth, Chiron, and I stayed behind.

Annabeth wiped a tear from her cheek. "I'm glad you're not dead, Seaweed Brain."

"Thanks," he replied numbly. "Me too."

Chiron put a hand on Percy’s  shoulder. "I'm sure you did everything you could, Percy. Will you tell us what happened?"

Percy sighed heavily, like just thinking about reliving everything caused him pain. But even so, he started to speak. 

He told us about what had happened on the boat, and his confrontation with Kronos. I shivered remembering my own conversation with the Titan just a month before. He told us about the dream he had while he was passed out—seeing the Titans on Mount Othrys talking about explosions and storms and the gods answering their challenge. He said he saw Krios, Atlas, and another golden Titan Percy didn’t recognize. And then he explained how he had been woken up underwater by our half-brother, Tyson, and brought to our father's palace. When he stopped talking, I got the sense that there was something he wasn’t telling us, but I didn’t think it would be a good idea to bring it up in front of Chiron. 

There was a long silence before the centaur spoke, his voice sounding ancient. "We must call a war council immediately, to discuss this spy, and other matters."

"Poseidon mentioned another threat," Percy said. "Something even bigger than the Princess Andromeda. I thought it might be that challenge the Titan had mentioned in my dream."

Chiron and Annabeth exchanged looks, like they knew something I didn't. I hated when they did that.

"We will discuss that also," Chiron promised.

"One more thing." My brother took a deep breath. "When I talked to my father, he said to tell you it's time. I need to know the full prophecy."

Chiron's shoulders sagged, but he didn't look surprised. "I've dreaded this day. Very well. Annabeth, we will show Percy the truth—all of it. Let's go to the attic."

When we got to the big house, Chiron told Annabeth and Percy to go into the attic and retrieve the prophecy. Then he turned to me. 

“Go and tell Carsen to call a war meeting, and if you pass any senior counselors on the way, inform them and send them to the War Room, immediately.” 

I nodded and ran out of the big house as fast as I could, not wanting to argue. As I flew by the infirmary I risked a glance inside, but wasn’t surprised to see it empty. I knew Cady wouldn’t be in there, she usually took the night shift and spent her days training the rest of her cabin, but it still would've been nice to see a friendly face. I shook my head, reminding myself I had a task to do, and ran towards the center of camp. 

I didn't stop until I reached the lookout tower, a giant structure resembling a treehouse in the heart of camp that overlooked the whole valley. From the top of it, you could see just about anywhere in the Camp, including its borders. Since I arrived, it was always manned, day and night, with a camper stationed to look for possible threats. It was also the place that they sounded the conch from, signaling meals and other events.

I looked up at the massive structure that stretched into the sky, took a deep breath, and began climbing the wooden ladder. I hated doing it, and I hated heights, since every foot into the air brought me closer and closer to Zeus' domain. But the Lord of the Sky hadn’t blasted me with a lightning bolt for climbing the tower yet, and I figured he had bigger problems to worry about than watching his pesky niece encroach on his territory. 

I reached the top, panting and sweaty, and found Carsen sitting with binoculars up to her eyes. The daughter of Hermes had light hair which she usually wore in a ponytail with freckles on her cheeks. She had been at camp longer than me, and although she was quieter than her siblings and liked to keep to herself, I knew her to be kind and wicked with a sword. She whipped around when she heard me, her weapon in her hand and ready to strike. 

“Angie?” I got the sense she wasn’t used to people in the tower with her. 

“Hey, Carsen. Chiron sent me. We need to call a War Council.” 

She nodded solemnly and picked up the large conch that sat on a low shelf. I felt a thrum of power radiate from the shell, like I always did when I was around anything from the sea. She raised it to her lips and let out three short and very loud calls—a signal that all senior counselors would recognize. A signal that would send them straight to the war room. 

“Thanks.” I said with a weak smile as I turned to start my trek back down the tower. Once the conch sounded, we only had minutes to get to the Big House before the meeting started. 

“No problem…Angie?” 

I turned back to her. 

“Is it true? About…about Beckendorf?” 

My heart sank into my stomach hearing his name. I had no idea how word had reached Carsen already way up in her tower, but I didn’t ask. I just nodded. 

“Yeah.” 

She looked down and let out a heavy sigh, muttering a phrase under her breath. “May his soul find rest in Elysium.” 

I didn’t realize she had spoken in Ancient Greek until she switched back to english. “I’m glad Percy made it back, though.” 

I nodded, turning once again and climbing out the hole that functioned as a door. “Me too.”

[ruvviks]

Chapter >> 19 [x] Characters >> ??? Total >> 7.7k words Warnings >> Alcohol mention, death mention, family / parents, injury mention, smoking

‘More information has been released on the explosions in Charter Hill from a few days ago. The office building in question was supposedly in use as a hideout by the infamous fixer known as “the Broker” on the streets. The explosion itself did minimal damage, but most of the building has been consumed by the fire that broke out on the lower levels.

The NCPD has yet to confirm the number of casualties though emphasizes that no innocent civilians have been caught in the crossfire. The Broker has presumably died on the premises. Their mercenaries have scattered across town and thus far, no further incidents have been reported.

It appears that peace has finally returned to the streets of Night City. And with that, the weather.’

It was the end of August.

The streets were dark. A pitch black sky hung over Night City, heavy rainfall threatening to pour down and a hint of static in the air though not quite enough yet for a full storm to break loose. Nearing the evening hours- the sweet spot right before rush hour where the whole city seemed to be holding its breath, roads left eerily abandoned as restaurants and bars began opening their doors and people packed up their things to leave work and go home.

The run-down apartment building cast a dark shadow on the streets of the Glen, curtains of windows behind bars and grids closed and apartments left unilluminated and cold. The graffiti-covered entrance hall was abandoned- the sound of heels clacking softly on the faded and cracked tiles leading up to the concrete staircase, a single bright fluorescent ceiling light flickering and swaying from a strong breeze blowing in from the hall.

It was one of the older buildings in town. Its initial purpose had been to become a beautiful and bright home to working class families- affordable housing close to work, with stable electricity and HVAC and everything else needed to be able to live comfortably and safely raise a kid or two.

An idea, a dream; exactly how many projects in Night City often started, a vision easy enough to make reality yet halted halfway through because of financial reasons, corporate interference, gang territory expansion, a cyberpsycho incident, economic or political interests or a cocktail of several- or all- of those reasons.

Which is how the building had instead ended up as a derelict ruin with barely working electricity and apartments in the possession of shady owners- some going for triple the rent it was worth and others cheap but in such poor condition one might as well be sleeping on the streets.

Home, sweet home.

The seventh floor stood entirely abandoned, its apartments burnt down after a fire a few years back. All except one; in the far back, safely tucked away from the main street and overlooking the outskirts of Vista Del Rey, though the windows had not been cleaned in who knows how long leaving not much outside to see.

It was small, cozy. A single room apartment with a tiny bathroom in the corner, the door only half in its hinges and never repaired. It held barely any furniture, an old couch with coffee table that missed a leg marking the living room with a mattress on the floor behind it as bed, and a small kitchen on the left next to the front door made out of mismatched cabinets and an old oven and stove that looked like it was as old as time itself.

Despite the clear absence of a resident, the place was not as dirty as it could have been. Recently dusted and the kitchen counter was clean, fridge in working order running on an external generator and stocked with basic foods and some liquors. A safehouse, presumably; or at least a temporary refuge for someone who needed desperately to hide, or simply needed the solitude from time to time.

Cold, grayish blue eyes slowly trailed the dark room, the silence inside nearly deafening. Who had known Night City could be so quiet? Everything else was so far away, an aura of loneliness weighing down on the stuffy interior air making it harder to breathe. Searching hand found a light switch- flicked it on, and a string of colored lights along the top of the window on the other side of the room turned on, bathing the apartment in a soft, reddish pink glow.

Home, sweet home.

It did not feel like it.

He slowly took off his coat, holding it under his arm as he carefully walked further into the room. Ran his free hand through his short, slicked back hair- it was a little damp, still, caused by the humidity outside as well as inside, and he exhaled a little sharper than he had meant for as he quickly dried his hand on his pants.

The place made him uncomfortable, despite the warm and inviting atmosphere the colored lights created. It was too heavy with history- too much hardship had happened between those four decrepit walls and too much of it lingered still and it left him with so many questions; questions he clearly already knew the answers for, but questions that would not leave him alone either way.

Matvey had lived in an apartment like that himself, too.

Many, many years ago; when he had been in his early twenties, only recently escaped his parents’ home, struggling to find balance in the multitude of aspects of his life and struggling to get by.

His eyes trailed the walls, over pictures that had been left there, faded by the decade that had passed but showing people, friends, at parties and roaming the Night City streets after dark, smiling brightly at the camera with closed eyes and scrunched up noses.

And his gaze lingered on one boy in particular, present in nearly all of them- bleached blond hair that reached his waist, some freckles covering his forehead and cheekbones, pale grayish blue eyes above a wide smile, and a small gap between his front teeth.

Oh, Vitali.

Matvey carefully took one of the pictures from the wall, only barely able to contain his irregular breathing and heartbeat as he slowly scanned the faces of both his son and someone unfamiliar next to him; a boy with light brown hair and golden eyes, face full of piercings and a tattoo peeking out of his shirt on his neck.

They were kissing in the picture. Matvey had never even gotten the chance to meet him.

The howling of the wind outside made him shiver while he quickly put the picture back, hairs on his arms standing up straight as the cool breeze blew through cracks and holes in the outer wall of the apartment.

It did not feel right to stand there. It did not feel right to exist in the space Vitali had once existed in, struggling to get by, struggling to survive in a city that was so desperately trying to swallow him whole. And if Matvey could go back in time to change it- any of it-

But it was far too late for that now.

‘Vitali?’

Matvey stood motionless as he watched his son enter the house- flashlight of his phone illuminating the dark hallway- coming home from one of his classmates’ infamous parties while Matvey himself was already getting ready to go to work.

‘Party lasted a little longer than I had thought,’ Vitali instantly blurted out, and Matvey glanced at his watch; nearly five in the morning, and Vitali would have school in only a few hours- but most importantly, Nadya had not even given him permission to go in the first place.

Matvey lowered himself on the couch and exhaled sharply, the memories washing over him like a tidal wave slamming itself into the coastline. Memories of an easier time; but now he was not so sure anymore, wondering if it had truly been as simple as he had always thought, wondering if perhaps his own judgment was clouded, unreliable.

Matvey slowly walked closer to Vitali, trying to think of anything to say; scold him, perhaps, punish him for his recklessness and misbehavior-

But something stopped him from doing so.

Something on Vitali’s face- the way his eyes widened the second his father began moving closer, the way he clearly tried to find the right words to say- the way he swayed on his legs and could barely keep his phone in his hand and the way his eyes almost glossed over when Matvey got close enough-

He simply reached out and plucked a half smoked cigarette out of his son’s hair.

Nadya had not needed to know.

The lights along the wall and ceiling lightly flickered as another strong wind caused the glass of the window to rattle in its frame. A late afternoon dust storm blowing in from the Badlands, leaving the city streets in a thin layer of sand once it would settle down again; the one time anyone would be glad to have a roof above their head, no matter how run-down.

Matvey clasped his hands together, frown decorating the upper half of his face, the howling of the wind the only thing breaking through the silence surrounding him alongside the ringing in his ears the explosions from a few days earlier had left him with-

His eyes fluttered shut and a shaky exhale left his chest.

Oh, Vitali.

It had not been worth it.

Months of planning, months of fighting- months of losing sight of what was right and what was wrong and everything in between and most of all losing sight of what it had all been for in the first place. Revenge? Trying to prove a point? Trying to be good enough for a woman who had lost interest somewhere down the line, to the point she had started to become more of a stranger to him than his own wife?

And where had it led him?

Where had it all led any of them?

‘Perimeter is clear. You should be safe here.’

The familiar voice was comforting, in a way.

It sounded different now; the years had not been kind to him, but still Vitali had grown up to become a fine looking young man radiating more confidence than he had ever done at any point in his childhood, and Matvey would be lying if he said he was not proud of his son for getting to the point in his life he was at now.

He opened his eyes again and watched as Vitali entered the apartment, cane lightly clacking on the old wooden floorboards with every step he took. His eyes trailed the room- though too fast for anyone to be able to fully take in any of the smaller details, and the white-knuckled balled fist along his body told Matvey he would rather be anywhere else.

‘Thank you, for this,’ Matvey quietly said in Russian, but Vitali cut him off with a single shake of his head. He couldn’t even look him in the eyes- gaze fixed on the photos on the wall as he took a step back, wincing lightly and putting his hand over the patched up wound in his side.

‘I don’t want your gratitude,’ he coldly replied. ‘Words mean nothing. Not anymore.’

Matvey understood.

Nothing he could say would set things right. Nothing he could say would change what had happened, would make it all go away- and as far as Vitali was concerned this could easily be part of his plan, still, trying to get closer to him in a vastly different way; try to gain his trust and strike when everyone would least expect it to come out victorious at the end of it all either way.

It would have been a genius plan, Matvey had to admit- well within his capabilities too, he could have pulled it off.

But that was not who he was.

Not anymore.

‘You have- a long way to go,’ Vitali quietly continued, taking out his cigarette case, flicking one out and carefully lighting it, the flame of his lighter softly illuminating the space around him.

‘Make things right. Somehow. Prove to me that you are better without Nadya. And I can’t help you with any of that, so- good luck figuring it out for yourself. I have nothing to win or lose in any of this anymore, so do whatever you feel like doing.’

A nonchalance to his voice, but the words he spoke were heavy. As if all of it was a burden to him- and Matvey knew exactly why, having had enough interactions with Vitali’s friends thus far to know that they did not fully support his son’s decision.

His actions would speak louder than words.

Of course Vitali did not know that Matvey had come with him to that tiny ripperdoc shop- Viktor, I believe his name is- and had stayed with him all that time, refusing to sleep, agreeing to let himself be handcuffed as humiliating as it was just to ease others’ minds.

Of course he didn’t know that Matvey had helped that fixer, Rogue, put together a fake profile for the Broker to get that poor excuse of a Council’s attention away from the both of them entirely and to make sure the NCPD had a name to settle on to put the case to rest in their archives, never to be seen ever again.

And of course he didn’t know that Matvey had willingly allowed some netrunner he could not remember the name of wipe his own entire existence from Arasaka’s database, to make sure they would never find out the truth but at the same time rendering him incapable of ever returning to the corporation, even if he for whichever reason so desperately wanted to.

But what difference would it make if he knew?

‘I won’t let you down,’ Matvey finally answered, lowering his gaze to the ground. Not out of shame, or dishonesty- but if anything out of fear, fear of what he would see on his son’s face, fear of his words being taken with a grain of salt despite how heavy they weighed on his tongue, despite how sincerely he meant them, and he clenched his fists on his lap as a sharp exhale left his body.

A long way to go.

But at least Matvey knew where to start.

‘Hey, Vito.’

The interior of Misty’s shop was comfortably warm, gently illuminated by a few lit candles scattered around. A welcoming sight as always- the interior colorfully decorated but not too clashing or too bright on the eyes, and Vitali would be lying if he said it didn’t make him feel at home.

She hadn’t closed yet; though no one else was inside at that time of day, most of Little China’s residents seeking shelter from the dust storm passing over elsewhere in either the Megabuilding or one of its many diners or restaurants. Misty herself was stood behind the counter, leaning on top with her elbows and softly humming a song.

Vitali wiped his feet on the doormat and quickly took off his mask and glasses, stuffing them in the pocket of his long coat before giving Misty a wave and a smile as he walked closer. She smiled back at him in return; and reached out to ruffle his hair the second he got within her reach, sand and dust falling out of it like snowflakes and sticking to his clothes on the way down.

‘Is Vitya still here?’ he asked, setting his cane down beside him and leaning on the counter as well, eyes fixed on the deck of tarot cards in Misty’s hands she was shuffling.

‘Of course,’ was the response, as usual. ‘City never sleeps.’

‘Neither does he, it seems.’

‘And neither do you.’

Vitali scoffed, a smile lingering on his face as he lowered his gaze to the floor beneath his feet. He couldn’t even argue with her; had not slept at all last night despite recovering from a shot that could have killed him- that should have killed him- only a few days ago.

‘Got time for a reading?’ Misty asked, reaching out to place her hand on Vitali’s before he could pull back to make his way outside, to get to Viktor’s shop. ‘Startin’ to become kind of a tradition at this point, I think.’

‘Hm- with V, maybe.’

Vitali paused, reaching out to the tarot deck in his friend’s hands- she fanned them out near automatically for him, a slightly questioning look in her eyes- and he picked one out, turning it between his fingers and clicking his tongue upon seeing the result.

‘Your cards do not like me very much,’ he finished his sentence with a wink and a smile, and he grabbed his cane again while dropping the tarot card labeled “death” face up on the counter as he made his way around it through the back door of the esoterica.

He had walked down those stairs many, many times before; knew the route to Viktor’s ripperdoc clinic as intimately as the route between his office and his home. Perhaps even more so- visits albeit sparingly going back years in time to long before his time as a fixer, long before he had moved into the penthouse he lived in now.

The familiar smell of sharp disinfectant entered his nose halfway down the steps. The familiar struggle to open the gate to get inside- the familiar sight of Viktor mid drying his hands on a hand towel on the other side of the room, giving him a warm smile as he slowly walked over.

‘Was wondering when you’d show your face again. How’re you feeling?’

‘Tired,’ Vitali bluntly answered, closing the gate behind him. ‘My whole body wants to lay down in bed and never get out, my skull feels cracked and I have not had an appetite since I woke up, but- what can you do.’

Viktor reached out- a gesture that nearly caused Vitali to flinch, a rush of adrenaline locking up the muscles in his neck- and gently cupped his cheek, slightly tilting his head around as he checked his eyes; then placed his hand on Vitali’s forehead, a soft hum that could have both been of approval as well as disapproval leaving his throat.

‘It’ll settle soon enough,’ he finally spoke. ‘You were-’ A pause. ‘You were close to-’

‘I know, Vik,’ Vitali quickly interrupted the old ripperdoc. ‘I know.’

Vitali could not remember much of any of it anymore.

He remembered feeling the cool night air on his skin, the very same slight breeze that had later caused the fire inside the building to spread rapidly from floor to floor. He remembered being lifted into a car- being held by several people at once, staring up through the half opened car window to the dark sky and heavy clouds and the blinding city lights flashing by.

They had brought him there. To Viktor’s shop. He had no longer been conscious by then, and it had taken him a while to wake up after being stabilized; and even then he could still not remember when and how exactly he had gotten home, and the previous day was by that hour also mostly a blur to him.

Vitali’s gaze met Viktor’s again and he instantly took notice of the expectant look in his eyes; no words leaving his lips, but the question was crystal clear to him either way. And in hindsight, Vitali was not entirely sure anymore why he had gone to Vik’s in the first place, when there was really not much else to say.

‘I brought him to the safehouse today,’ Vitali sheepishly said, fumbling with the handle of his cane and lowering his gaze to the floor. ‘He will be staying there for- well, I don’t know. Until he has figured out what to do next, I suppose.’

‘Good.’ Short response. Vitali nearly wished he had just gone home instead. ‘Did it ease your mind?’

He absently nodded, Viktor’s words taking a moment to settle in his brain and as they did the light bobbing faltered and faded into a sigh, shoulders slumping forward as he reached out to grab a chair from beside him and he slowly sat down.

‘I thought it would, but… I don’t know anymore,’ he answered honestly, barely able to look Viktor in the eye as the man sat down on his own stool nearby and wheeled closer. A comforting move- and Vitali’s heartbeat settled down a little as it happened, glad he did not have to cut the conversation short.

‘Did I-?’ he started, frowning as he reconsidered his words and momentarily searched for something else to say. ‘Shouldn’t I have-’

‘Hey- no. Don’t start doubtin’ yourself now, kid.’

The soothing tone of Viktor’s voice seemed everlasting with his patience, and Vitali closed his eyes and dropped his head as the ripperdoc put a reassuring hand on his wrist.

‘Not after everything you’ve been through,’ he added to the statement, and fuck, how Vitali wished he hadn’t- if he had just made a couple of different decisions somewhere along the way then he wouldn’t have had to-

‘But what if I was wrong?’ Vitali blurted out, the words lingering inside his head for much longer than necessary and rendering him unable to keep his mouth shut, like many times before. ‘What if-’

‘You’ve made plenty of mistakes in your life, V,’ Viktor immediately interrupted him. ‘Just like all of us. Just like me.’

Well, that was unexpected.

Vitali frowned and looked back up, Viktor slightly averting his gaze to a point right behind Vitali to not have to look him in the eyes.

‘One of my biggest mistakes?’ he continued, a sudden instability to his voice that had not been there before and he gave Vitali’s wrist a soft squeeze. ‘Not listenin’ to you. Trying to tell you to not join Arasaka after you’d already let me know there was no changing your mind. Pushing you away like that.’

Vitali could not help but wonder how long the other man had been sitting on that one.

Wind blew in from up the stairs, rattling the gate behind them and causing the orange cat curled up in a little makeshift bed next to it to jump up, hiss, and skitter across the floor to sit between Vitali’s legs instead. He absently reached down to give him a few scratches on the head- Jack, he believed Viktor had named him- and used the moment to let the words settle in his head again.

Fuck, he was tired.

‘You were right,’ he finally replied, vividly remembering how desperately Viktor had tried to convince him to not sell his soul to the corporation so many years ago.

‘Doesn’t matter if I was right or wrong,’ Viktor cut him off again with a single shake of his head. ‘I wasn’t there for you the way you needed me.’

‘You’re not my dad, Vik.’

‘But he wasn’t there either, was he now?’

Silence washed over the room and a pang of anger tightened Vitali’s chest; though he managed to shrug it off with ease, knowing the frustration was unnecessary since Viktor was merely stating facts. He lowered his gaze again, staring at Jack who was slapping his ankles and attempting to bite through one of his shoes- and for some reason it caused a small smile to take shape on his face, despite the rest of the circumstances he’d found himself in.

‘Look, kid,’ Viktor quietly said, ‘I can’t tell you whether you made the right call or not. Truth is, I don’t know. I don’t know what I would’ve done. But I trust your judgment. And I’m not gonna let history repeat itself.’

‘What if I am wrong?’

‘Then we’ll find out soon enough. What else are you gonna do about it now?’

He was right.

Of course he was- what else was there for Vitali to do? He could lock Matvey up, and then what? Accidentally turn him into a second Ravager because of it? He was not leaving the man to his own devices. Was not trapping him but would keep an eye on him either way, make sure the things that had happened would never ever happen again-

‘Every decision you’ve made along the way has led us here. You did the best you could.’ Viktor stood up again, giving Vitali a gentle pat on his shoulder before turning around to tend to the mess on his desk, grabbing a stack of papers and shoving it into one of the drawers.

‘You’re just one man, Vito,’ he continued, ‘and you know what? Him too. What’s wrong with this city is that too many folks have this- this “kill who you can kill” mindset. Let’s be honest here, what real difference would it have made to take this one man’s life?’

‘Others have died along the way,’ Vitali bluntly fired back, reaching down and barely reacting when Jack instantly attacked his fingers, pupils dilating upon spotting Vitali’s rings and trying to pull one off his hand. ‘It would’ve been better to save them.’

‘And you tried, didn’t you? Had you killed him, would things have been different? Who else would have lived? Who else would have died?’

It was impossible to say.

Too many external factors at play- Ravager and Dupoint as rogue variables, as well as each and every single one of his father’s mercs. Nadya’s influence had changed so much; what would she have done if Vitali had successfully killed Matvey at any point in time? Would she still have wanted to remain on the sidelines?

‘Sometimes, living is a punishment,’ Viktor suddenly quietly said and Vitali looked back up at him, needing a second to realize he himself had stood up as well and had followed Viktor further into the room.

‘The human mind punishes itself more than enough- and death just… puts an end to that. It’s what makes it so appealing to some when life gets very difficult for them.’

His words were carefully chosen and Vitali could feel his chest tighten again, a lump in his throat making it harder to swallow. He knew Viktor was just putting out general statements, but he couldn’t help but take notice of the slightly targeted remarks dripping down from between the lines, the backside of a coin presented to him visible through a reflective surface behind it.

‘I don’t think the others understand,’ Vitali absently mumbled, a poor attempt at changing the subject.

‘And I don’t think that matters all that much,’ was the ripperdoc’s straightforward response. ‘Nothing’s been forgiven. Nothing’s been forgotten. You simply spared his life and gave him a temporary place to stay, an opportunity to better himself. What he does with that is out of your control.’

He made it sound so easy.

Vitali rarely worried about his reputation among others, knowing very well he could not satisfy everyone and attempting to do that would be as useless as trying to rid Night City of all crime. Sure, he tried his best to stay on the good side of at least the Council- even during all of this he had done nothing to anger them on purpose- but he did not let his worries about it stop him from doing what he felt was best for the situation, or for the parties involved.

But accusations were starting to stack up rather rapidly now. The belief some had he had joined Arasaka again for a while- unaware of the brainwashing, or simply refusing to believe it had happened- the belief some had he was the Broker himself, and now the doubts people had in him because of the outright refusal to kill his father despite the man being just one person in the bigger picture of things.

‘Do you think it will work out?’ Vitali carefully asked, watching as Viktor began setting some tools back on a shelf- and for a split second he was twenty years old again, swaying on his feet with his head completely elsewhere begging Viktor to tell him it would all be okay, to tell him it would be worth it, only to be met with deafening silence and an averted gaze.

‘Of course it will, kid,’ Viktor quietly said and an involuntarily, relieved sigh left Vitali’s chest.

‘It always does.’

Everything would fall in place in time. Viktor was right- of course he was. Vitali had no idea how long it would take, what it would take, but he wasn’t one to give up so easily and neither were any of his friends and for any of them to walk away now after everything they had been through together would be the most unrealistic scenario he could think of.

Of course it would be fine, in the end.

‘Can’t say I’ll ever like him, though,’ Viktor suddenly jokingly added to his statement. ‘But- s’pose we can coexist in peace.’

Vitali huffed in response, taking a step back to lean against the wall. ‘Can you imagine.’

‘Not in a million years.’

They were quiet for a moment, Vitali’s mind wandering off a little as he considered the possibility.

‘I mean,’ he quickly added- not entirely sure why he felt the need to, but it was already too late to stop the words from leaving his lips- ‘he’s a boxer. Like me. Like you.’

Viktor stopped what he was doing to turn to Vitali, and in his eyes where Vitali had expected to find judgment he instead found a softness that gave him just enough courage to keep talking.

‘Makes the worst jokes I’ve ever heard,’ he softly continued, ‘worse than Mikhail, if you can believe it. We used to… We used to watch those horrible hospital tv shows together every Sunday night when Nadya wasn’t home. We would rank all the male doctors from most to least attractive… We never settled on a winner.’

His voice finally trailed off and so did his gaze, glossy eyes trailing over the concrete floor and settling on a small stain near Viktor’s feet.

‘I’m sorry, this is- this is probably too soon, I didn’t mean-’

‘No such thing as too soon.’ Soothing, still, despite it all, like the strong hand he reached out and rested reassuringly on Vitali’s shoulder.. ‘You’ve had to carry that with you for years. Through all of this.’

He had.

Not at any point in time had Vitali stopped seeing Matvey as his father.

‘It feels like a lifetime ago,’ he mumbled, and his eyes fluttered shut when Viktor stepped forward and pulled him in for a hug, a sense of comfort washing over him and taking away any worries he’d had when he had entered the shop.

‘You think things will go back to how they used to be?’

‘No,’ Viktor replied without hesitation, but his voice lacked any hostility.

‘Absolutely not. And that’s for the best.’

The penthouse was not yet dark when Vitali came home, a couple of lights from the living room dimly illuminating the hallway leading up to the front door. A welcoming sight; his years in solitude had not done him well and Vitali would be forever glad to no longer have to live alone.

Mikhail and Vincent were curled up on the couch together under a blanket, quietly laughing about a joke one of them had made. The TV was still on, and Vitali’s eyes trailed over the coffee table- drinks and the remnants of snacks scattered across the marble tabletop.

Movie night. He had missed it a lot in the past few months.

‘Hey baby,’ Vincent said as Vitali walked closer and he reached out to gently grab both of Vitali's hands to drag him on the couch next to him. ‘How’d it go?’

‘Good,’ Vitali answered, leaning in to press a soft, slightly hesitant kiss on the corner of Vincent’s mouth. ‘Good, I think. He’s at the safehouse, everything is settled. For now.’

A short pause, as he sucked in a shallow breath and took a moment to scan both their faces. Vincent had not stopped smiling since he had entered, still looking up at him with a sleepy look in his eyes; but Mikhail refused to make eye contact, visibly biting the inside of his cheek as he instead played with Vincent’s hair. He was notably holding back all of his tics.

‘And here?’ Vitali quietly asked, gaze lingering on Mikhail a little longer until he finally looked up to answer.

‘Rogue called,’ he said. ‘Council has…mostly calmed down by now. The fake profile and “evidence” was enough to convince them and- well, streets are mostly back to normal. Which is really all they ever wanted in the first place.’

‘No ties to me? Or my-’ He stopped to swallow his words. ‘Or to Matvey?’

‘None at all,’ Vincent replied, and carefully brushed some of Vitali’s hair out of his face. ‘Don’t expect an apology from them, but- it’s over now.’

Vitali huffed. ‘All I ever wanted.’

It would do him good to finally no longer have to deal with them. The feeling of their eyes on his back had been a constant annoyance throughout the whole ordeal and all of that could have so easily been prevented if they had simply listened to him from the start.

But Vitali found it was best not to dwell on the Council’s behavior and decisions for too long. As Vincent rightfully said- expecting an apology would be as stupid as expecting to get any financial compensation or support from them for the resources and supplies lost along the way.

At least it would secure his spot out of their direct line of fire during the next Council meeting, whenever that would be. The thought alone already made him shudder- he’d never been all too fond of the gatherings in the first place, but they had gotten significantly worse since, well, recent developments.

‘What about Rogue?’ he finally asked, pushing his own thoughts aside.

‘Mostly just sounded very relieved that it is all over now,’ Mikhail said, shrugging as he grabbed the TV remote to turn off the still rolling credits from whatever movie they’d watched. ‘Will you- Will you go see her?’

‘Did she say anything?’

‘No.’

‘Then I should probably just stay out of her way for a while. Best for all of us.’

That finally got a smile out of Mikhail, glancing over to look at Vincent who had kept his mouth shut but was furiously nodding and Vitali gave him a playful poke in his side, causing his boyfriend to snort and accidentally headbutt Mikhail in the arm in his delayed attempt at dodging.

‘You know what we should do?’ Mikhail asked, playful sparkle in his eyes as he jokingly pulled Vincent closer to hold him in a headlock. ‘Go on vacation. Get out of town for a little bit.’

‘Hmm- Sounds lovely,’ Vitali said with a smile, kicking off his shoes and pulling his legs up on the couch as he moved closer to the both of them and allowed Vincent to drag him in for a hug. ‘Where to?’

‘Panam and Judes are going back to Arizona for a while, meet up with Saul and the others there,’ Vincent said, holding on to Mikhail’s arm with one hand and placing the other on Vitali’s waist. ‘Could go with ‘em- or the east coast.’ He glanced up to look at Mikhail. ‘You still got family there?’

‘I do.’ His eyes briefly lingered on Vincent before moving back to Vitali, and a few soft clicks of his tongue left his lips before he continued. ‘They still want to meet you, by the way.’

Vitali softly smiled back and lowered his gaze, chest tightening a little as Mikhail spoke. He had often mentioned his extended family in their childhood; had often asked Vitali to come with him one day, and how Vitali had wanted to but had never been allowed to travel outside of town because of Nadya and her general dislike of his friend.

Things are different now. She’s not here.

He couldn’t help but wonder where she was, though. If she was doing well.

‘I’m going to bed, important day tomorrow at office.’

Mikhail finally let go of Vincent and kissed him on the head, then reached out to ruffle Vitali’s hair- receiving a fake groan in return as response- and he leaned in to give him a hug, hands on the back of Vitali’s head and running in circles on his back as Vitali dropped his head in the crook of Mikhail’s neck and briefly closed his eyes.

Everything is fine. You’ve not ruined anything.

Mikhail gave him a kiss on his temple and then finally got up from the couch, stretching and yawning before making his way toward the hallway on their left.

‘Good night, you two.’

‘Night,’ Vitali replied in unison with Vincent, who immediately mumbled ‘jinx’ after it and instantly received another poke between his ribs from Vitali. He giggled and shuffled closer, pressing his face against Vitali’s shoulder as he carefully wrapped his arms around his waist.

‘Took you long to get home,’ he murmured against Vitali’s neck, softly pressing his lips against his skin.

‘Had some things to do,’ Vitali absently replied and hooked his arm under Vincent’s leg to pull him on his lap, quickly glancing into the hallway to check if Mikhail was out of sight.

‘Nothin’ I wouldn’t do, I hope?’

Not a surprising question- and Vitali could not blame him. He’d be lying if he said he hadn’t considered it; stopping by a bar on the way there, or on the way home, couple shots wouldn’t hurt him- on a surface level, at least- and at least it would cause his anxiety to settle down for the time being.

But he couldn’t do that to Vincent. Not again.

‘I went to see Vitya,’ he quietly explained himself, gently cupping Vincent’s cheek to make him look up at him, and gave him another soft smile. ‘That’s all.’

Vincent blinked a few times and then leaned in to Vitali’s touch, cheek pressing against his palm- slightly turned his head to kiss it, before turning back and gently fixing the collar of Vitali’s shirt for him. Keeping his hands busy; he was nervous.

‘I’m sorry,’ he mumbled, one of his fingers hooking into Vitali’s shirt a little bit and brushing past his collarbone. ‘Shouldn't've doubted you.’

‘Hey,’ Vitali gently interrupted him and placed his hands over Vincent’s, waiting until his attention was back on him. ‘It’s okay. I get it.’

‘No, no- it’s- I just-’

‘All of it.’

He almost startled himself with it; but it was the truth.

No amount of attempting to justify himself and his actions would take away the fact it made sense people had started to doubt him somewhere along the way. If anything, Vitali’s stubbornness had made everything ten times more complicated than had been necessary and he was surprised it hadn’t caused any bigger arguments to break out in all the time that had passed.

‘My family has always been complicated,’ he quietly continued, lowering his gaze and softly running his thumbs over Vincent’s hands. ‘I- I don’t expect you to ever understand and I know what it looks like from the outside. I do. And I can’t blame you at all.’

‘Vito-’

‘I don’t know if I’m making a mistake with this.’ A brief pause, a shaky inhale. ‘I don’t know what is going to happen next, what he will do. What I will do. But I just- I couldn’t kill him.’

‘I know, baby.’

Vincent carefully cupped Vitali’s face in both his hands and leaned in- a brief moment of hesitation, as if they’d been sent back in time and suddenly had only been together for maybe a month or two- and kissed him as sweetly as he always did, the familiar taste of his peach chapstick spilling into Vitali’s mouth as he pulled him closer.

Vitali would be lying if he said he hadn’t been scared he would never get to experience that ever again.

‘Suppose it was complicated for him too,’ Vincent quietly continued, slightly pulling back and brushing his nose past Vitali’s, ‘considering- well, you know. And… I won’t fully understand it, but I understand that. Can’t fuckin’ stand my piece of shit oldest brother but if I’d find him bleeding out I- I also- you know. A little different, of course, but- I get it. I do.’

‘I never meant for any of you to get dragged into all of this,’ Vitali mumbled, keeping his eyes closed as he softly pressed his lips against Vincent’s again. ‘I’m sorry.’

‘You keep apologizing, but none of this is your fault. He started hunting you down- that’s on him.’

‘I should have dealt with things differently-’

‘How?’

Vincent pulled back a little further and Vitali finally opened his eyes, barely able to see his boyfriend through the blur of his own tears.

‘What would you have done differently if you could go back in time?’ Vincent asked, running his thumbs over Vitali’s cheeks. ‘What would you change?’

‘I would… I would’ve…’

He couldn’t finish his sentence.

‘Bit late, don’t you think? Or should I say early?’

Vitali’s eyes fluttered shut and he exhaled deeply, slowly dropping his head against the front door as he closed it with a soft click and reluctantly turned around to face his father- once again already dressed to leave for work, arms crossed in front of his chest.

‘They really wanted me to be there,’ he quietly mumbled in response, wincing slightly when Matvey reached out to grab his jaw and gently run his thumb past a large bruise on his cheek.

‘I can tell,’ he replied. ‘What happened?’

‘Nothing for you to worry about.’

‘Are you alright, at least?’

Vitali clenched his jaw and could not force an answer out of himself.

He wouldn’t have done anything different. And he knew. And he knew that Vincent knew.

Perhaps foolish, or naive- but it had paid off in the end, as messy as it had been. Death happened each and every day in Night City and even fixers weren’t safe from that; a somewhat morbid reminder of that to mercenaries and the Council alike, and if anything it had finally woken them up after who knows how long of being so certain of their own untouchability.

Who knows how it all would have ended, had Vitali done something different? Who would have lived? Who would have died? He was no longer sure what had caused the dominos to fall in the first place- and there had been no way to prevent it from happening, years of events setting it in motion out of itself- and no one had been able to predict where the chain reaction would lead them in the end.

‘Family’s fuckin’ complicated,’ Vincent said, kissing Vitali on the forehead before getting up and walking over into the kitchen to pour the both of them a drink. ‘I’m just glad that it’s over now. And that you’re still with me.’

Vitali absently nodded, gaze wandering off to the large windows along the wall behind him, looking out over the balcony and the pier of Wellsprings, the vast ocean blending in with the dark horizon far outside the city.

And for a brief second, he could feel his entire body freeze, eyes locked onto the darkness ahead and breath caught in his throat; it felt familiar, too familiar, swallowed whole by the endless void with the feeling of eyes staring right back at him, waiting, expectantly.

‘Hey.’

Vincent had walked back to him, concerned frown decorating his brow as he sat back down next to him and gently cupped his cheek to force his gaze away from the ocean and back on him, the warmth of the light above the coffee table causing the uncomfortable feeling in his chest to settle down- but it did not vanish entirely.

‘I love you,’ Vitali quietly said, the words heavy in his mouth as he spoke and he could only barely stop a tear from escaping the corner of his eye when Vincent smiled at him and pulled him closer to his chest, the warmth of his arms finally making Vitali feel at peace again, and at home.

‘And I love you, baby. Not ever gonna change.’

Life in Night City moves fast.

Its endless crowds are an overwhelming presence during every hour of the day, under the sweltering west coast sun as well as under the blinding city lights long after dark. An ever-growing playground for corporations, fixers and fortune seekers alike- the city of dreams that swallows everyone who does not know what they’re getting themselves into whole; without remorse, and without hesitation.

A city where tragedy strikes too often for people to concern themselves with it anymore- most have grown numb after years and years of hearing the same news on the radio, and most know it’s a waste of energy to even try to care. Cut off one head and two take its place; and one seed planted can infect many at once, leaving the source of the problem nearly irrelevant in comparison to what has grown in the meantime.

Impossible to predict and impossible to control. Many have tried- many have failed- from corporations attempting to get inside people’s heads and control their every move from within to a single man taking matters into his own hands to try and rid the streets of its corruption, starting with its intricate network of fixers and mercenaries as a whole.

But in all of that, there are still people who do care. Who choose each other over and over again- who choose life, over and over again- who refuse to be stripped from their humanity and hold on to it as tightly as they hold on to each other through it all.

The city itself might never change. But people can.

That’s what makes us human after all, isn’t it?

[grigori77]

Critical Role, Campaign 3 Episode 99

O.O Where will this go? What's gonna happen? Everything's up in the air and it's SCARY ...

That's not Sam! It's an undertudy ... "Marsha"? Okay, then ... ah, there he is. The popsicle ... oh boy ... XD Marish: "So ... Sam is just lazy now?" Sam: "I sure am." LOL ... yeah ...

A three part story? Huh? Downfall? intriguing ...

So NORMAL BUSINESS resumes in August ... right ... gotcha ... that's ... interesting ...

Travis: "The stand up and walk?" Oooooooh ... AHA!!! Hello, Mr Mulligan! And he's IMMEDIATELY overacting magnificently ... XD

Introductions, then ...

Tengar, the Eternal Palace? Cool ... "the Quill of Infinites"? Hmmmm ... oh, so there ARE no humans here? That's new ...

Aru? And Edun ... hmmmmm ... okay, so here we go then ... Luz? I am getting a little weirded out by the reverb effect ... it is making it a little hard to keep track here ...

Yeah, this is all very trippy and abstract right now ...

So ... is the Orchar of Possibility SUPPOSED to be a proper orchard or is it a metaphor? I'm so confused ...

Oh, so ... did this Edun character just ... DIE?!!! Is that what just happened?

I maintain this is all very odd ... I'm going to have trouble with this if it continues like THIS for the entirety of this story ...

"Doom" is approaching? U-huh ... I'm sorry ... "EDAM"? LIke the cheese? Yeah, that name choice may not go down THAT well in this corner of the world ...

Yeah, I think RUNNING might be the smart move here, whatever this shit is ...

Shosti ... oh, wow, that one almost felt like a proper DEATH ...

Brennan: "Welcome to the real ..." and a dex roll for the group? Interesting ...

Yup, now they're becoming corporeal beings, then ...

Oh wow ... saved by a hug? Trippy ...

"It's here." WHAT'S here? I don't know what's going on!

Does that mean Edam's becoming a kind of navigator for this sort-of ship? They're guiding them through this ... chaos?

Wait ... so this is like some kind of genuine act of cosmic creation? And they're multiversal beings compacting into one finite possibility of all their potentials ... this is STILL fucking trippy ...

Ooooh ... existential dread! Way to go, Laura ...

Brennan: "A different time and a different place ..." Wait .. WHAT?!!!

NOW what's happening?

Sometime after the Age of Arcanum ... oh, so this is still sort of set DURING the Calamity, then? Okay ... Hawk's Hill sounds ... quaint, really ... or it's starting to sound more like a refugee's boondocks, now ...

Trist, then ... she sounds nice, really ... pleasant, I like her already.

Gilly? AWWWWWWWWW ... he's a good boy, clearly ...

So they're a whole family, then ... okay ... oh yeah, clearly Trist has got her hands full ... Amaris? Oh, he's a firbolg? Cool ...

Ah, so Ayden's like a cleric, then? Okay ... or perhaps more of a novice, since he's only 15 ...

Also, he's clearly a bad influence ... XD

Yeah, a long term couple still very much in love is always so heartwarming to me ...

So ... Emhira's like ... the companion of Purvaan Sol, then? She seems like a gentle soul, I don't understand why he could EVER leave her ...

Wow ... so he's still got that wolf, then ... yeah ... it's still unnerving ...

Tal's playing a female elf? Cool ... this should be interesting, then ... Asha ... okay, she's clearly fallen on hard times ... did she live directly through the Calamity itself, then?

Her friends are an interesting bunch ... oh, she can TALK into their heads? ALSO interesting ...

Ah, so she knows Purvaan? Okay, then ... things are starting to come a little clearer ...

A skyship? Cool ...

A herald? Okay ... an aeormaton? COOL. Oh, so he's, like, some kind of bureaucrat? Okay, maybe a bit LESS cool then, I guess ...

Ah, so THAT'S what happens when the DM needs to pee ...

Investigation check? Roll well, Laura ... "a place of hunters" ... hmmmm ...

A medicine check? Nick rolls and 1 and a 2 ... ouch ... not a great start, lad ...

So they're sick? That's not good ... oh, okay, Ayden's gonna do his cleric thing, then. Lesser Restoration? Cool ... whoa ... that DIDN'T work? He just ... died? Hmmmm ... oh, this is ... heartbreaking ...

Ah, so the group is starting to coalesce, it would seem ... okay then ...

SILAHA? So THAT'S what the aeormaton's called, then ...

The crate gives them a "funny feeling"? Hmmm ...

Insight check!

Oh, trouble? MIssing patrols? Interesting ...

Wait ... Ameris isn't going with her?

Is Ayden going to try and FLIRT with SILAHA to get some food for the beggars? And a spare tent? That's sweet. Create Food & Water? Wow ... "A tent is far easier to spare than food." Oh yeah, this kid's definitely one of the GOOD ONES.

Oh, I think I'm starting to understand their relationship a little now ... and I love the "darling" ... XD

Wow ... Topher just made that big shady crook's day ... LOL

Heartbreaking goodbyes, then ... oh, so SHE'S the one parting from her family? Trist is very sweet with her kids, too ... yeah, we're gonna FEEL this absence, clearly ...

"Two days"? Gods ... you can only hope ...

Oh, so Asha's parting from her friends too, then?

Now I like that ... Emhira charges Purvan to watch over Trist's family, and her childredn in particular ... nice ...

Aha ... so Aeor has, like, COMPLETELY turned against the Gods because of the Calamity, then ... that's unsettling ...

Yeah, Ayden's clearly a cleric, so this won't be sitting well with him at all ...

Now THAT'S a powerful final image for her ... more heartbreak, then ...

SCENE CHANGE!!! What now, then?

Gathering around the crate ... all right, what's this all about, then?

Oh, so it was a smuggler's trick? Interesting ... so who's THIS final member?

A stone encased in ice? Huh?

Oh, this is turning into something very creepy indeed ... the Emissary? What even IS THIS THING?

FUCK this thing is TALL.

Yeah, Asha is a MOODY bitch. LITERALLY.

SILAHA: "It's supposed to be apples!"

Well that sounds PROFOUNDLY unpleasant ... Latimus Princepts? Lovely ...

The Emissary: "Dark." SILAHA: "Yes, it's very dark darling, but just stay inside."

Warships? Really? This just got interesting ...

I'm sorry ... these engines are literally being powered by MURDERING DEMONS DOWN TO THEIR ESSENCE?!!! That's just CHARMING ...

Wait ... Asha's ACTUALLY a wolf? That's really cool. And kind of adorable, in a goth kind of way ... :3 And VERY Taliesin, too.

Dispel Magic? Really? Oh, this is an interesting and novel use for this particular spell ...

Zone of Truth? Crap ... group Charisma save! Balls ... Paladin Aura ... ah, so Ayden's a PALADIN, then. Okay. Nice trait, though ... +5s all round, then ... yeah, a bunch of apples has no need for lies anyway ...

Suggestion? Ballsy ...you better make this GOOD, Laura ... 17! Sweet ...

Asha's thinking about just EATING the problem. Okay ... O.O

Brennan: "On a 25, a wild goose chase erupts on the Venatoria." XD

Aeor? Awesome ... so it's still an impressive sight, then ...

Break time, then ...

The Ars Ward?

Yeah, that is A LOT of aeormatons ...

Wow ... enslaved demons walking about in the open? That is kind of unpleasant now I think about it ...

Honestly, overall there seems to be something deeply WRONG about this place, to me.

Ah, SILAHA, you silver-tongued devil you ...

Asha: "This place is beautiful as only an obscenity can be."

Mage Hand? Ooooh ... some mischief, then?

"This man will be dead before sunrise"? WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK?!!!

The Opus Ward?

So technically this place is the wrong side of the tracks, Aeor-wise ...

A ruined, dephiled temple? Interesting ... which deity?

The Archmage Arcadia Cerenvetorix ... yeah, she's FASCINATING already ... oh, and she's VERY friendly with Ayden ...

Aha, nice magical camouflage. The Emissary IS very STRIKING, after all ...

The Emissary: "LIttle lies are okay?" Trist: "Sometimes."

Yeah, typical raven behaviour ...

Thin golden chains ... holding the scales of justice? Ooooh ...

Brennan :"This is a place where they tried to kill a story. It's a very frightened thing to do."

A priest of the Dawnfather? Blimey ...

Well this is a very ... disconcerting group ...

A weapon? The Factorum Malice ... yeah, sounds about right. Yup, as we thought, a godslayer ...

Father Milo Cowst ... Tichar, Umleta and Zaharzht ...

A TRAITOR? Really? A worshipper of the Dawnfather's turned snitch on them?

Oh, it was an ANGEL?!!! Whoa ...

Aha ... so, now to THE PLAN!!! What to do, then?

Insight check a god? Yeah ... I don't think 17 would quite do it, somehow ... Luck? Okay ... 17 AGAIN?!!! Holy shit ...

The three elements?

The Obtenebrator ... its engine ... the Latinus Princepts ...

The Eravox Protocol ...

Take out the Obtenebrator, open up the defences, bring in reinforcements ... sort of ...

Aha ... split the party, then? NEVER a smart call ...

So it's OFFICIAL, then. They're planning on DESTROYING the city. THIS is what happened ...

Well, that's all a bit ... Hellraiser ...

Oh, okay ... NOW that opening makes some twisted sense ... Brennan you sneaky bastard ...

Aha ... dissent among the ranks?

Does he never tell the truth or ALWAYS tell the truth? Bloody hell, man ...

32 insight? Fucking hell, Ashley ...

Arcadia: "I've put a lot of work into this mind, and I'll thank you not to touch it."

"Two bats, one stone." Um ... yeah ...

Mask of Many Faces! Sweet ...

"The Subtlety Brigade" ... XD

Zaharzht: "I can heal." Sure you can ... O.O

Rary's Telepathic Bond? Nice ...

The temple's Icons have been restored? SWEET!!!

Ayden casts Death Ward on the Emissary. Yup.

So that's it, then. Game time. And OF COURSE that's where Brennan calls it a night ...

Thank fuck I finally got a handle on what was going on ... that whole opening was VERY confusing ...

[oldguy56-world]

Once

I have done many things in my lifetime and like most people when I find something that I enjoy doing I will do it more again. Like eating hamburgers. I love eating hamburgers so I have been fortunate enough to repeat this activity several thousand times in my life. For the record I have no regrets.

There have been (however) times upon occasion that I have tried something new and it turned out to be a one time thing. This has been for many reasons, sometimes outside of my control. If you are young and reading this (Why?) learn from my experience. If you are old and reading this either you have also tried some of these and stopped or you were smart enough never to consider doing it in the first place. I envy your fortitude.

Walk with me down memory lane and learn.

Skiing. We had to do this for P.E. class. Besides my lips flapping uncontrollably as I hurtled down the hillside I came to the realization that this accomplished the same thing as tobogganing in that it got me from the top of the hill to the bottom very fast. At least on a toboggan it wasn't far to fall when you wipe out.

Curling. I liked this. I found that when I used all of my strength the rock would go shooting out of my hand and when it hit the little rubber things you start your feet in at the other end the rocks launched majestically into the air. They asked me to never come back again.

Riding a loop-de-loop roller coaster. When it finally stopped I was so disoriented that I attempted to ride a horse from the merry-go-round home. I didn't seem to get anywhere.

I ran a 10K race. I am as shocked as you are but there I was seemingly in the peak of my physical prowess. When the race was over I threw up food I had never eaten.

Went to Mexico. Aside from the fact that they lost our luggage, we saw sea snakes that kept us out of the ocean and two men tried to pick me up at a swim up bar (not that there is anything wrong with that) it was an ok time but that was before all of the kidnappings, murders and other mayhem that is happening now.

Smoked weed. I distinctly remember this. I inhaled June 17th 1973 and exhaled August 22 1975. The rest is kind of fuzzy, but I swear I only tried that one puff.

Traveled by train with family to the east coast. I had the upper bunk and knocked myself silly every time I tried to sit up. I was standing when the train made a sharp turn putting me butt first into the corner of a table, and all cars were smoking cars back then. No wonder Agatha Christie set a murder on a train. I was ready to kill somebody on my sole trip.

Drank warm Guinness. Let me set the table for this one. I was sixteen and we were visiting family in England. The pubs didn't care about ID as long as you paid. A PINT (22 ounces) of Guinness sold for 4 pence which was 10 cents Canadian. I spent a dollar (you can do the math on how many ounces that was) and it was served at room temperature. Everything else that happened that night I blame on the greasy peanuts I ate.

Had gas in front of a Bishop. I was twelve and an altar boy. He was visiting for the 11:30 mass. I had beans and eggs for breakfast at 8:00am (not smart now that I reflect on this) and, well that was that. I believe I did set a record for the youngest person ever excommunicated from the Catholic church.

Got lost in Montreal at Expo 67. Was it my fault that none of the people there spoke English? On the upside I did eat a whale steak and a buffalo steak, both also one time things so I hit the trifecta.

THOUGHT OF THE WEEK: Life is to be experienced and that is great as long as you learn from each experience.

[688199]

Felinette one shot: August 23

august 23, she dragged me out to the park on august 23.

i didn’t want to. believe me i tried to refuse. but when a girl pops her head through your window with a sparkle in her eye, saying:

“join me?”

you just can’t.

“but my dad will know i’m gone.” i replied. but nonetheless she grabbed my hand and pulled me closer. the unwavering smile on her face, glowing even brighter than the blinding sun above, told me everything i needed to know.

marinette… she didn’t care. like a dog she bites down on what she wants and never lets go. and like a dog she ran along the streets of belleville, carefree. and i am nothing but the shadow that followed after her.

“w-wait!” my words were lost as air rushing past her ears. marinette didn’t stop. her smile only grew wider.

we ran, and we ran. we ran until all that drowned my mind was her and her only. even the colourful splatters of energy that streaked across every wall reminded me of her. they were one and the same, street art and her. vibrant, beautiful, authentic.

“this way!”

marinette swerved into an alley, then burst out the other end. it was as if we stepped through a portal, for what awaited on the other end was a stark contrast to the usual chaotic grit of the neighbourhood.

white stairs ascended up a gentle slope. bushes stood tall, guarding the tranquility. marinette led me up, her eagerness simply fizzing the more we climbed. her emotions must be contagious because for the first time in a long while, i found myself holding my breath with her.

then we reached the top, and finally turned around.

“beautiful, right?”

it was.

we could see the whole of paris from the little hill we were on. my house in the distance, as well as her’s, on the opposite end. below, people carried on with their ant lives. above, the vast blue sky speckled with wispy clouds.

august 23, it was the day i truly understood the world around me. so small yet so large. so different yet so similar. the world, it ran on opposites.

i looked at marinette. she looked at me.

august 23

i took her hand, and held it firm.

(im not proud of this at all, it started alright, then i didn’t really liked where it was going. plus it’s 12am and im kinda tired so it doesn’t really make sense lol)

[walker-extended-universe]

Walker Promo Poster Analysis Time!

It occurred to me that all the promo posters we've been getting lately have different backgrounds and that seems very important to me so I'm just going to look at each poster one at a time and see if I can parse any meaning out of it. Okay? Okay!

Let's start with the first poster we ever got:

Now, the main trait that connects all these posters is the dark clouds on the horizon (likely symbolism for the dark clouds covering everyone's futures and how bad things are going to get), but those are different for each character. Here, Cordell's clouds cover the majority of the sky with only a few places for sunlight to break through. I think this could mean that things are going to get a lot worse for Cordell before they get better.

I also want to call attention to the ground behind him. It looks like the ranch, grassy and hilly, but there's also a house on the right. I believe that's the farmhouse he lives in with his children. This could mean that he's going to actually put in an effort to be more present for Stella and August and put his work on the backburner (for real this time).

Next, August:

(I had to grab this from my blog bc it is no longer on any Walker social medias so excuse the poor quality

A few things I want to point out. August's stance (something else that varies) is mimicking his father's. His cloud pattern is also similar to Cordell's, but it's lighter. I think this could be a sign that, though he has been led astry by his own instincts (sound familiar), he still has time to course-correct and get on the right path. Perhaps even with Cordell's help.

The ground here is also different. There are a lot of trees and bushes and the hills seem more pronounced. There is also a fence blocking him off from the messy, unorganized area. Could this be a sign that his journey back to August the Noble will be a difficult one? And, perhaps, his family (or others) laying down some boundaries will keep him from straying the path?

Next, Abeline:

Abby's stance is the same as Cordell's and August's so I won't touch much on that except to say Family Resemblance.

Abby's cloud pattern deviates from the previous ones. The clouds are placed differently and she seems to have more light than her son and grandson. This could be a sign of her good recovery or that other areas of her life will improve over the season.

Her ground background is puzzling to me. The left and right sides seem to be two completely different properties. The one on the left is the ranch, I believe, with a simple wooden fence. On her right, she has what looks like a garden protected by a white-picket fence and a small water tower in the background. Does this represent the impact she's had on the Walker ranch with her garden? Or will she have to make a choice about something? Perhaps she will have to limit her physical activity because of her recovery and she has to give up something she enjoys to meet that limit?

Liam:

Okay this is where things get a little crazy.

First of all HIS STANCE!!!! It's totally different than everything we've seen so far! He's facing the left instead of the right and he's looking over his shoulder a bit. Could this indicate that he's going to be breaking away from the family going forward?

His clouds are also drastically different. There's actual blue sky! I think Liam's going to make great strides toward healing and bettering himself.

The ground is also interesting. It's very flat and mostly grassy. Clear fields ahead? There's also a horse, which is most likely a tie in to his horse therapy and sanctuary plot. Perhaps this is a sign that he will succeed?

Trey:

Okay, again, the stance. It's very similar to Cordell's but he's facing the camera a lot more head-on than we've seen previously. Something tells me he's got some challenges ahead that he can't afford to back down from.

Also his clouds! They are DARK! These are storm clouds! Something very bad lies in Trey's future.

Also the ground. This is very odd. He has dry grass behind him and overgrown bushes scattered beyond that. There's no house, no fence, no sign of any life or civilization. It looks sort of like that area Cordell and Dan raced through in 2x12. What could that mean? Is he going to have to make some tough choices that land him in a bad position? Is he lost (physically, emotionally, mentally)? There's so much potential here but I can say that things are going to be very tough for the newest ranger going forward.

Bonham:

Okay, again, STANCE

He's facing left, like Liam, but the way he faces the camera is closer to Cordell, just opposite. Could be reading into this too much but Bonham's gonna be having troubles with both of his sons this season.

His clouds are dark and there is some light but we can't see any patches of blue sky. I think Bonham's going to have a lot of hard choices to make and there's more trouble for him on the horizon. With Abby in the hospital and having to face both of their mortalities so harshly, plus troubles with August and Liam, it's no wonder his future is a little stormy.

His ground background is interesting. He has a barbed-wire fence behind him, some grass in the foreground, and trees on the hills in the background. I'm also fairly certain there's a cow on the right. Perhaps Walker Beef will stand another chance? Regardless, the ranch seems to be a focal point for him. It's his home and his legacy.

James:

Okay this is interesting.

I'd say his stance is similar to Bonham's. He also has some very dark clouds behind him but there are rays of sunshine poking through. We haven't seen much indication for what his plots are going to be this season so it's hard to say what this means but he could be making strides towards betterment in a few areas of his life that are overshadowed by larger issues.

His background is drastically different than everyone else's. He's not on the ranch, he's in the city. He has a flat, grassy field behind him with some trees that looks like it could be a public park. We also see the skyline of Austin in the distance. It's interesting to me that he would have a background off the ranch while Trey doesn't. Is this a sign that he's distancing himself from the Walkers? Or does he just have more going on in the city?

Last on- Stella:

Her stance is interesting. She's facing the same direction as her father and brother but, like her uncle, she's looking over her shoulder instead of facing the camera head on. This could be a sign of her trying to break away from the family.

Her clouds are also interesting. There's sunlight! And blue skies! Still plenty of dark clouds but she's got a much better weather forecast than most of the rest of her family. Maybe she really will figure out what she wants with her life by the end of the season and she's going to take strides towards it?

Her background is also very interesting. Like Abby, she's got two very different things on the right and left. She's also the only Walker without anything resembling the ranch in her background. On the left is her mother's car behind what looks like a meta guardrail/low fence. It still hasn't been de-modded but maybe she likes it better that way? On the right is a building I don't think we've seen yet with a white van parked in front of it. Maybe this is where she finds her purpose? Some kind of volunteer center? Or, maybe she finds a new home? The further background also has some different trees than we've seen before. Not sure what that means but if she really is breaking away from her family..... It's interesting.

-Edit for new poster-

Cassie:

Okay we got some interesting details here.

Cassie's stance mirrors Trey's. She's facing the camera head on and not angling to the side. There's definitely some challenges ahead for her.

Her clouds are also similar to Trey's. Not the same pattern exactly but these are some very stormy clouds. There's no sunlight or even a hint if blue sky. It's all very greyed over.

Her background is interesting too. She has the park and city in the back, like James, but the city is on the right rather than the left. Perhaps this is a sign of their differences in opinion and values? I also keep going back to how she and James have non-ranch backgrounds while Trey is in the thick of it. Is this a sign of distance from the Walkers? Could she be looking at a separation from Cordell? It's very interesting....

-----

Well, that's all the overanalysis I have in me I think lol. I may be reading way too much into this and making some wild claims but it just strikes me as interesting that they would customize the posters for each character down to such detail. It HAS to mean something, right???? Or am I just crazy? Be honest with me, I can take it.