#but both are starting off with basic clinical practices

[bbyboybucket]

I’m starting all the big girl stuff and learning how to do diagnostics and treatment methods. Way to make me equally terrified and excited 🥲

[harryspet]

Fic or Drabble whichever you wanna do.

Dark bsf Rafe taking advantage of vulnerable pregnant reader. Maybe her parents kicked her out? Or her baby daddy left her. Or whatever u see fit.

(Sorry if that sucks I just love ur work sm 🩷)

homestead | r. cameron [p.1]

[warnings] dark!rafe cameron x pregnant!reader, farmer!rafe, pogue!reader, implied jj x reader, kidnapping, future NONCON/DUBCON, little editing, READ AT YOUR OWN RISK 18+

word count: 3.6k

In which you reach rock bottom after JJ gets arrested and your first love returns to save the day.

main masterlist

A boy. 

You looked down at your eighteen-week ultrasound picture and smiled weekly. You and JJ were having a baby boy, and you’d found out completely by yourself. Pope had offered a million times to attend one of your appointments, practically begging a few times because he didn’t want you to go alone. You always rejected him, as the idea of going with someone else never felt right. 

The Heyward’s had already done so much for you by letting you live in their spare bedroom for, basically, your entire pregnancy. No matter how much Pope tried to tell you that they didn’t mind at all, you saw in their eyes that the last person they wanted their son to be friends with was JJ Maybank’s baby mama. You promised them you’d be able to save enough money to get your own place by the end of your pregnancy. 

So far, your day job at a retail clothing store and the late shift you worked as a waitress at The Wreck made you enough to keep you afloat. Pregnancy check-ups and ultrasounds were an expense you weren’t initially expecting and you hated that you were contemplating skipping the next few visits to save money. Besides that, appointments meant you couldn’t work and you needed all the hours you could get. 

The picture reminded you of how much hard work was left, but the feelings were bittersweet. You were so excited to meet your little boy, no matter how small he was at the moment. If JJ’s case would move a little bit faster through the system, he could be there for the big day too. Everyone in Kildare was biased against him, knowing his father too well, and you knew the system would be biased against him as well.  

You were grateful for Pope and for knowing someone else loved JJ as much as you did. JJ wasn’t hard to love, but he was a complicated person, and your relationship seemed to bring out the darkest parts of him. Pope saw his dark side, but …he wasn’t there the night he got arrested. 

You didn’t know someone could yell so loud or be so angry. The two of you were living with his Dad, and the first few months were relatively peaceful, mostly because Luke would usually go out at night, get wasted, and crash on some other part of the island. You and JJ usually played house, taking turns making dinner for each other and sleeping together side by side. 

A week before you realized you were pregnant, Luke came around asking JJ for money that JJ “owed” him, and of course, JJ refused him. You knew he’d been saving for months to take you off the island for your birthday, and he wasn’t giving that up. The fight escalated, with both sides verbally tearing each other down. As soon as Luke mentioned JJ’s mother, there was no stopping JJ. 

The fight had already moved from the bedroom to the kitchen to the porch, and then the men wrestled in the yard. JJ would’ve killed Luke if the police hadn’t come. When he got taken away in cuffs, he was a bloody, swollen mess that you didn’t even recognize. 

It became even messier when Luke decided to press charges against his own son even though they’d both been arrested. You then decided that Luke Maybank was heartless and wouldn’t ever see what you saw in his son. 

It was the weekend, your one day off, and you’d chosen to spend most of it walking to the nearby department store after your trip to the clinic. The Heyward’s wanted to spend the day out on the water but rides on the boat were starting to make you extremely sick. Besides that, you hated fishing and It was one of the hotter days of summer but you’d chosen a lightweight t-shirt dress. Well, dresses were starting to be the only thing that you fit correctly with your growing stomach. 

You tucked the picture you were holding into your purse as you made your way inside. For the past month, you’d been working up the courage to go down the baby aisles. Yet another thing that felt completely wrong doing without JJ. Cara had also offered to help buy you things but you told her every time that you were waiting until you were closer to your due date. You’d hold off from nesting until you were sure that JJ wasn’t getting out. 

Slowly, you looked over every item. Cribs, diapers, breast pumps, baby formula, bottle warmers, and bibs. It was all so overwhelming and you knew getting everything would be expensive but the price tag didn’t quite register to you until now. You had no idea how you were going to pay rent one day and afford all of the things your baby needed. 

You picked up the cutest crib mobile decorated with rocket ships, stars, and planets, and your heart skipped when you realized it was over a hundred dollars. You’d have to work an entire shift to earn that. 

“Y/N?” 

You turned towards the deep voice and the mobile tumbled from your hands, “Shit,” You cursed as you went down with it, hoping you hadn’t broken it because you couldn’t afford to buy it. Rafe Cameron pushed his cart to the side and hurried to help you, “I got it,” You said quickly as you turned away, handing it back on its display. 

Then you really looked at him. The boy you’d been so obsessed with in highschool was not a boy. His light brown hair was longer than you remembered but was tamed by a baseball cap. His white t-shirt and jeans didn’t match the version of him you had in your head, but, honestly, he looked better than you remembered. 

He smiled, rubbing the stubble on his face, as he seemed to take you in. If Rafe looked ten times better, you probably looked ten times worse than you used to. You felt huge although people just started taking note of your bump a couple weeks ago and your hair was messily gathered away from your face. Your dress was not name brand, in fact, you remembered buying it from the exact store you were standing in and you wore boots that used to belong to JJ now that your feet were starting to swell. 

“Hey,” He said.

You breathed out, “Hi.”

“Congratulations,” Rafe glanced at your belly and you wanted to crawl inside your own skin, “I guess?”

“Thanks,” You nodded, “It’s . . . complicated.”

The sad part about being pregnant, unmarried, with your child’s father sitting in jail was that people had no idea what to say to you. 

“How are you?” He asked after you went silent.

“I’m good,” You forced a smile, “How are you?”

“Better now that I’ve ran into you,” His smirk was the exact same as you remembered, “You shopping for the little one?”

“Browsing,” You said, “Didn’t quite realize how expensive all this stuff is.”

You looked at him for understanding before you remembered you were talking to – Kildare’s richest bad boy, “You still keep all your little friends around?”

“Yeah, we’re all a bit spread out now, though. I’m staying with the Heyward’s right now.”

You weren’t quite sure why you were exposing your life to him, but part of you wanted him to know that you were fine, that you had made the right decision choosing JJ over him, and that you were still figuring out life, but you’d be happy. 

“Oh, so it’s Pope’s baby?” The smug look on his face made you realize he was teasing you. 

“You know exactly whose baby it is, Rafe,” You shot back, your eyes rolling back.

You turned to walk away but he grabbed you by your arm, “Y/N, I’m kidding. I’m kidding. I’m sorry, Honey.”

You quickly pulled your arm away from him, folding your arms in front of your chest. You looked over his cart, seeing it was filled with miscellaneous things, but the only thing you could recognize was a massive back of dog food, “You got a dog?”

 “A few,” he said, placing his hands in his back pockets, “I use ‘em for animal herding. Wrangler, Sadie, and a few puppies.”

“Animal herding?”

“Yeah, I got this place on the mainland. I just came through to see Wheezie. I promised she could have one of the puppies before I sold the others.”

“You got a place on the mainland?” Your eyebrows raised, and you tried to keep your mouth from gaping, “Puppies?”

He nodded, laughing lightly, “Had to get my shit together after I got out of rehab and living with my Dad and Rose, it was just never good for me. Still working for him, but I’m just better on my own, you know?”

“I didn’t know you went to rehab,” You said quietly, still trying to process the information he was relaying. 

“A few times to be honest but I’ve been clean for a year,” He admitted while looking a bit closer at you, “Is there anything you need right now? I can help.”

“No, I couldn’t let you do that,” You shook your head quickly, “I’m fine.”

“You never like to accept help, do you?”

“I don’t need anything right now,” You assured him. 

“Hmm,” Rafe huffed, “Can I at least give you a ride, Y/N?”

“How do you know I don’t have one?” 

He gave you a knowing look that made you want to punch him. He was new and improved Rafe, but he was still an asshole, “Well, I also came to look for a new living room rug, and I could use a woman’s perspective. Help me, and I’ll give you a ride back to the Heyward’s.” 

“Whatever,” You shrugged before you began walking, “Fine.”

In his eyes, you could tell he thought he’d won. 

This was so wrong. So, so wrong. JJ would kill you. JJ would kill him. This wasn’t high school anymore, and you weren’t the insecure girl vying for the rich bad boy’s attention. Besides that, you’d always been an option for Rafe. JJ always chose you despite where you came from; now you might have a real chance of having a family. 

You blamed the way your body heated up when he spoke your name on your racing hormones and on the fact that you’d been separated from JJ for months. 

Rafe said he only came to main island to visit Wheezie, but as the weeks passed, you realized he’d found a new reason to visit. At least two times a week, he came in to the Wreck to order food and talk to you. Not only that, he practically texted you daily checking in on you. 

“Why the sudden change?” You asked him one night when closing time was closely approaching and you’d served all your tables, “I mean, I know you hated JJ but I didn’t think it would get in the way of, you know, us.”

“It’s my biggest regret after getting to know you again,” He admitted and the look in his eyes made your heart sink, “But I didn’t really know what I was doing when I was younger. I was so stupid, all I cared about was getting my Dad’s approval and I spiraled when that inevitably didn’t happen.” 

He had a way of making you question all of your own decisions. 

“Ward definitely wouldn’t approve of me now.”

“I told you I don’t care what he thinks.”

“Or what the entirety of Figure 8 will think?”

“Not at all,” He said.

“I care what my friends think.”

“You’re different than them now,” Rafe reached across the table to grab ahold of your hand as his blue eyes stared deeply into your eyes, “You have a great responsibility on your shoulders now. You have to do what’s best for you and the baby. That’s it, fuck what they think.”

“They do want the best for me,” You whispered, tears stinging your eyes.

“They want JJ for you. And he’s sitting in jail right now.”

You pulled your hand away, looking out the onto the dock and dark water. 

“You don’t even know how you should be treated,” Rafe said mostly to himself.

“What does that mean?”

“It means–” He stopped himself, but his skin was flushed with red and you sensed he was calming himself down, “I just think you deserve better.”

“And you’re going to walk into my life after all these years and save me? I can do this by myself.”

“You shouldn’t have to,” Rafe leaned in, “JJ’s going to get out but things aren’t going to get better.”

“Why would you say that?”

“It’s true, he’s a fuckup. He won’t get a good job and there’s a good chance he’ll go right back,” That tipped you over the edge and your chair scraped loudy on the ground as you stood up, ‘“I’m sorry. Look, I’m sorry. I can drive you home.”

“Pope is coming to get me.”

You didn’t spare him a second look as you walked to the back of the kitchen. Until now, he’d refrained from putting all the weight of his judgement on you but you knew all a long he thought you were making a mistake. He’d been through a lot but he’d never struggled like you and JJ had. At the end of the day, he’d always had Ward’s money to fall back on. 

He just hated JJ and he was doing his best to get in between the two of you. 

Two weeks later, you were standing outside the Kildare County Jail, not because you were visiting JJ but because he was being released. Luke dropped the charges against him, and they released lower offenders due to overcrowding. You watched a few reunifications and waited on a cold bench in the lobby; blue hydrangeas in a small bouquet sat neatly in your lap. Your dress was also blue and printed with daisies. He had no idea the two of you were having a boy, and it was your sweet idea of telling him. 

You’d blocked Rafe’s number just that morning after ignoring his messages and calls. He was wrong. Even if he was calling to tell you that, you didn’t want to hear it. They never specified how long it would take to process him but you started to doze off after waiting for two hours. An officer in beige uniform tapped your shoulder lightly to wake you.

You were still hopeful and you expected to see JJ right behind him, “Hello, ma’am. Unfortunately JJ Maybank cannot be released today.”

“What?” Your eyes widened, “Uhm, why?”

“I was informed that additional charges have been filed against him.”

“What do you mean additional charges?” You asked, concern raising in your tone, “Who can I talk to?”

You when through every channel of communication possible, searching for answers. They couldn’t possibly expect you to leave like nothing happened. You found out from another officer, after heavy begging, that they filed another battery charge against him involving another inmate. Somehow, in the two days that he knew he was getting out he managed to catch another charge. 

“Could I at least visit him?” You’d asked and they told you he was in a segregated unit now and not allowed visits. 

You felt your heart physically break. When it fully started to sink in, you left to get fresh air. You walked for a long while until you started to panic. You sat down on the edge of the sidewalk and through teary eyes you tried to search for Pope’s number. What would you do now? Go back to the Heywards and continue to accept their charity? You were kidding yourself thinking you could do this alone. 

It felt like a rejection. You’d never had a real family. JJ knew that and yet he’d left you all alone again. 

You let your phone fall to the side, deciding you wanted to be miserable by yourself and you didn’t want to burden his family any longer. You threw the flowers into the street before your head fell in your hands and you finally let yourself cry for the first time since JJ had gone away. 

The bouquet you’d carefully put together lay discarded in the street and you had no care about the mud that was probably staining your dress now. Just as your chest started to tighten unbearably, you heard the low rumble of car engine and a shadow seemed to drape itself over you. You heard someone calling you, telling you to breathe, but your body wouldn’t obey the instructions. 

Your baby needs you to take a breath, you told yourself but the thought of your baby only made your guilt worsen, “I’ve got you,” You heard that familiar voice say. Being in his arms was far from familiar but your body didnt protest when it felt itself lifted in the air and placed on soft leather. 

The next time you looked up, you felt the car moving, and you saw the sun setting through the window. You felt a hand on your thigh rubbing soothing circles but you felt more paralyze than anything, “Try to take deep breaths,”  You heard him say but your body wasn’t yours to control, “Everything’s gonna be okay now. I’m going to take care of the two of you.” 

You were not in the squeaky twin bed at the Heyward’s house when your eyes peeled open the next morning and you realized that quickly. You saw wooden beams overhead and walls painted a soft cream color. You turned your head to see sunlight coming through lace-curtained windows. As fast as you could move with the extra weight, you pushed the comforter off of you and moved over to the window. It offered a view of rolling fields and distant trees, the greenery stretching as far as your eyes could see.

Looking back around the room, you saw a sturdy, antique bed with wooden nightstands on either side. A handmade quilt with vibrant patches of red and blue sat on top of the bed. Plush pillows piled at the head of the bed. On top of one nightstand was a well-worn book and a framed photo of younger Rafe with a blonde woman beside him. 

On the other nightstand was a vase of freshly picked wildflowers. You remembered your blue hydrangeas, and yesterday’s events came flooding back to you, “Fuck,” You cursed, and your eyes found the bedroom door. Before thinking about walking towards the door, you caught a glimpse of yourself in the large mirror, sitting on top of a wooden dresser. You were dressed in a white silk pajama top and bottoms, a tiny sliver of your belly poked out the bottom of the shirt, but otherwise, they fit you perfectly. All you could do was curse, “Fuck, fuck, fuck.”

You moved quickly towards the door, but it opened before you grabbed the handle. You covered your mouth as a shriek left your lips.

Despite your startled appearance, Rafe appeared calm. His hair looked like it had just woken him up, and he wore a simple T-shirt and gym shorts. He closed the door behind him, acting as another barrier to your escape, “What the fuck, Rafe?”

He shushed you, “You need to stay calm,” He warned you, “There’s no point in getting riled up.”

“I was having a panic attack and . . . and you–”

“You needed to get away,” He raised his hands as if to show he wouldn’t cause you harm, “I took you home with me.”

“You took me home with you?” You spoke back to him, “I have a home. Why didn’t you take me back to the Heyward’s?”

“That’s not your home, Honey, and you know that.” 

You shook your head, “You don’t get to decide that. Where’s my phone?”

“It’s wherever you left it,” Rafe shrugged, “You know, when you were having a panic attack on the side of the road. Alone and pregnant with absolutely no one looking out for you. Imagine if it wasn’t me who found you.” 

Rafe looked annoyed like it was you who was crazy in this scenario. You tried to ignore the thought of him undressing you and putting you in these new clothes. The idea of that became harder as you watched his eyes trail from your feet, higher and higher, “Jesus Christ, you don’t even know how precious you are,” He came closer until you were stumbling back onto the bed, “I want you to stay here with me.”

“And if I don’t want the same?” You looked up at him. 

“I’ll let you think it over. Give it some time,” He nodded to himself, “Are you hungry?”

You didn’t answer, only stared back, “I’ll make you something. I’ll be right back.”

He turned on his heel, and as you realized what he was doing, you hurried after him. He closed the door, and as you furiously turned the knob, you realized he’d locked it, “Rafe!” You screamed as you pounded on the door, “Rafe, please don’t do this!”

You felt your tough exterior melt away. This was serious. He was completely serious about keeping you here. 

You rushed over to the windows next, throwing open the curtains, and found that they didn’t budge even as you pushed at them. You kept yourself from another panic attack, knowing that Pope would be looking for you right now. You never told him about Rafe … you were so concerned about him judging you that you next rold him. But if someone found your phone, they would know … but you had no idea what really happened to it.

As you started to pace, you suddenly felt a fluttering sensation. You stopped as you felt a tiny kick inside of you, an unmistakable movement that echoed throughout your whole body. Gently, you caressed your stomach. “I hear you,” you said through heavy breaths as your eyes moved around the room. It’s okay. I’ll figure this out. Don’t worry.”

Please let me know what your thoughts and predictions are! Reblog with a comment to be added to my taglist!

[spectres-n-soap]

Times Long Since Past - Soap x You x Ghost

Content Warnings - Angst, hurt/comfort, fluff, therapy, pregnancy

A/N - Not gonna lie when I say I nearly cried writing this part.

Series Masterlist

Main Masterlist

The therapy office was located in a strip mall that had obviously once been a 1950s era housing estate in the past. You glance around the parking lot before Simon places a hand on your shoulder and pulls you from whatever pit you were trying to sink into. “Don’t stress.” He mutters and you roll your eyes.

“When in the history of the world did that ever make someone not stress?” You ask and he shakes his head but you can see his eyes crinkle just slightly. You sigh and look at the general area where the office was as your hand rests on your stomach. “Do you really think this will help?”

Simon nods, “It helps.” You sigh again before you nod and begin walking towards the office. A bell jingles over the door when you enter the office, Simon not far behind you and keeps the door open for you so it doesn’t bang into you. The receptionist smiles at you, a well practiced kind smile as she gestures for you to come forward. The waiting room was comfortable, only one other person sat in one of the chairs mindlessly flipping through the magazines. 

“Name?” The woman asks and you try not to let the happiness in her voice grate on your soul. Would you be happy like her again? You give her your name and she nods as she types it into the computer, “Date of birth?” You mindlessly rattle it off and give her the time of your appointment (in fifteen minutes) and she smiles at you, “Alright, if you could fill out these forms,” She passes the forms on a clipboard with a pen. “And take a seat. The doctor will be with you shortly.”

You waddle over to the nearest seat and sit down before you start to fill out the form. Its basic questions and you recognize them all from your psych evals in the military. You bite your cheek before you begin to fill them out truthfully. When you finish, you hand the clipboard back to the receptionist and sit back down. 

The therapist is nice. Clinically nice. You want to scream and rage as he calmly asks questions about what brought you here. His voice is perfectly level and you can’t even use it as an excuse for the reason you think he’s judging you. “It's not my job to judge, it's my job to help.” He says when you hesitate to answer.

“I lost someone very close to me.” You answer, picking over the words carefully because you and Johnny hadn’t put a label on it before he had died. Your stomach lurches at that sudden thought and you squeeze your hands into fists. 

“I see. Was this person the father of your child?” He asks and you nod tightly. The thought still leaves an awful taste in your mouth.

“He died in action.” You take in a shaky breath, “He didn’t even know.”

“Let's start there. If at any moment you feel uncomfortable we can stop this session.”

You leave not feeling better or worse but like a small weight had been lifted from your chest. As you walk back out into the waiting room with the therapist, talking about the date of your next appointment you see Simon. You freeze, having totally forgotten he had promised to wait for you the entire time. He inclines his head at you and you're brought crashing back into reality. 

You climb into his car and as he turns it on he offers to buy some lunch. “Got any cravings?”

“I’m pregnant. Of course I have cravings.” You grumble, “Mexican food. From this little hole in the wall place.” He hands you his phone, which is all kinds of busted up but the screen still works so he hasn’t replaced it yet, for you to type the address into.

You take a seat at one of the outside tables and a young man hands you both a small menu. The smell from inside the restaurant makes your stomach rumble and apparently the baby is into the smell too because they kick at your stomach. Hard.

You wince and bow your head a little as you hiss out a “ Fuck. ” You don’t see the way panic shoots through Simon but you feel his hand grab yours. You don’t pull away.

“Are you okay? Are you in pain?” He asks and you shake your head.

“The baby just decided to do some kickboxing, no big deal.” You let out a tight laugh that hardly seems to convince Simon. “Simon, I’ll tell you if it hurts okay? Promise.” Those words seem to put at ease and the arrival of your waiter draws attention from the way his ears turn pink.

Lunch is quiet between the two of you after that moment partially helped by the way you sort of shovel the food into your mouth. You can’t help the small moan that leaves you as you bite into enchilada and Simon coughs on the sweet soda he had been drinking.

You and Simon arrive back at your flat, takeout box in hand because your eyes were bigger than your stomach and you had ordered another enchilada and he places it in your fridge as you settle down onto the couch. Exhaustion pulls at you despite the good sleep you had gotten last night and you hardly notice when Simon places the throw blanket on your lap.

“You know… you still have some gifts to open.” Simon mutters and you look at him with bleary eyes and make a noise of confusion before you look at what he has in his hands. The gifts from the MacTavish family. Your stomach sinks and your throat closes up at the sight. You sniffle but reach for one of the soft green green eyes.

Inside the first one is a little soft green dinosaur onesie and a few baby books. One of the books has a couple of lullabies and nursery rhymes. The other is easy recipes to make during the first couple months with the baby. More onesies in the next one, soft blues, pinks and yellows, a teddy bear and a card with a heartfelt message from his sisters. Of course a few items such as a milk pump and a diaper bag are already filled to the brim with items.

Just as you think you’ve finished opening everything, Simon hands you a card and one more bag. “The cards from Mrs. MacTavish, the bag is from me.” He clarifies although he really didn’t need to. The bag was a soft gray. You open his gift first and genuinely laugh when it's a onesie with little skulls. You shake your head at his gift before you set it to the side. You carefully pull the card from the envelope it was in and open it. A couple pictures fall onto your lap but you read the message first.

My bairn was a lot of trouble during those first few months. I hope yours doesn’t come with the same mischief for the sake of both of you. I know there is nothing I can say to ease the pain or the hole that Johnny left in you but you’re not alone. You’ve been given a beautiful gift whether he knew it or not. You’ll always have a piece of my wee boy and you’ll always be welcome in my home. I’ve made a few copies of pictures of when Johnny was a wee bairn for you. Welcome to the MacTavish family.

You glance down at the pictures, tears in your eyes as you look through them. You couldn’t help the small laugh that left you at one of the pictures. Chubby baby Johnny pouting in his chosen outfit but the others make tears fall from your eyes. You rub your thumb over one of the photos of him smiling up at the camera, chubby hands holding his foot up.

[grannanna]

In Defense of Carlotta

So I was rewatching the Royal Albert Hall version of POTO and I kinda came to a realization: Carlotta didn’t entirely deserve what was going on.

I’m not saying she wasn’t a jerk. She is a primadonna for crying out loud. She’s got the ego of a peacock, but she’s still human.

At the beginning of the musical during her rendition of Think of Me and the bit between that version and Christine’s version, she gets attacked by the phantom. Of course everyone knows it’s the phantom but the managers all kinda just blow it off. We see her get upset and leave the opera cause she’s pissed.

You could frame this as her being a perfectionist OR you could see this as a woman finally breaking after years of abuse from a ghost of a man.

She says that “for three years these things keep happening” and that the previous manager never did anything to stop them. He simply paid the phantom and then kept casting her in the lead roles.

The phantom wants two things and that is to get Christine on stage and then into his arms. So, he sees Carlotta as an obstacle and has probably been attacking her for all those three years.

And what happens when she complains? When she gets scared and looks for someone to aid her? She gets either one of two responses:

The person is too scared of the opera ghost to do anything.

The person doesn’t believe in the opera ghost and acts like she’s crazy.

Both result in someone telling her “these things do happen.”

So can you blame her for leaving after she got close to dying AGAIN?

And then less than a week after leaving she finds out that they replaced her already? After all that talk about how she was the best of the best, the crème de la crème, her years and years of training, they replace her. And not only do they replace her, but they replace her with practically a teenager who has been getting trained by the very man that keeps trying to murder her?!

No wonder she was so angry when she stormed into the letters scene! Those she trusted had replaced her, sent her a taunting note, and then had the gall to ask her to come back!

I think this also recontextualizes the majority of Primadonna. These jerks are asking her to come back and of course she’s hesitant, she doesn’t wanna get almost assassinated again, but that tiny bit of vanity and pride comes up in the back of her mind.

Furthermore her “public needs” her. This could be the pride but I like to imagine her thinking of a little girl in that audience that wants nothing more than to be like her. Music was one of the only arts and ways to make money open to women at the time. Shes an example of how women can be independent in this world.

And ya know what? This man is trying to ruin her life. He doesn’t know her, but he keeps tryin to intimidate her and make her give up on something she clearly has a passion for. If you watch the recording of the 25th anniversary version of Primadonna, after the phantom gives his good ol “imma mess up the show” threat, she cocks her head and gives a little smirk. Shes saying “screw you. I worked hard for this. I spent years of my life, hours of my time, all of my energy, to be the best of the best and not you nor any spooky ghost can stop me!”

In the next opera, Carlotta and Christine are clearly having fun playing opposite each other. You could argue that this was just for the opera to go well, but I can tell you as an ex-actress myself that feelings towards your cast mates can get past you and the audience will see it.

(For instance, in high school I was playing opposite a guy I had a crush on and he had a crush on me, so when we went to a clinic (judges giving you advice on your show before competition) the judge basically told us to decide whether or not our characters liked each other or not cause it was making it too complicated for the stage. (For context we were playing Jo and Laurie. Laurie likes Jo, Jo doesn’t like him like that) Once the play was over we started dating. TLDR the audience will know if actors do or don’t like each other)

So Christine and Carlotta are having a good time because I think Carlotta realizes this isn’t Christine’s fault. Someone was going to have to take on the roll and it gave this young artist a start. Plus, it’s not Christine’s fault the Phantom became obsessed with her. He could have chosen literally anyone and Christine just happened to be the (un)lucky girl. I don’t see any evidence of Carlotta holding any grudges against Christine in this scene.

Also, this is just a minor thing, but I think that this was the right casting for this specific opera. Carlotta is much more voluptuous than Christine. She can’t exactly Mulan herself but Christine is younger and smaller and therefore can. This isn’t a talent thing this is basic casting. The entire opera is more important than the phantoms obsession. Also, the page boy is still a good role! If anything it seems like a pivotal role that just happens to be a mute one! The phantom should be excited that they’re not just throwing Christine back to the ballet dancers!

And then, when everything is going well, when she thinks that maybe the opera ghost has given up, that terrible voice announces that she and the mangers have pissed him off. You can see in her face she’s trying to be strong but she is scared. Shes not angry. She’s not petty. She’s scared.

She only gets mad at Christine when she reacts to the phantom. Yeah she acts like a jerk, calling her a toad. But the man trying to kill her is talking and the girl he is obsessed with his looking around for her “angel” which is Carlotta’s angel of death. So she’s gonna get mad. She’s gonna yell at Christine even during the show cause that’s her only outlet at the moment.

I would like to note here that that is a dick move on Carlotta’s part. However, we just had the two having a good time and we don’t know for sure that Carlotta didn’t apologize afterwards. We have a whole time skip between acts. The two could have made up.

But back to the show, the phantom seems to magically curse her to croak like a toad. In the version I saw in high school she took a sip of water that had something the phantom put in it to make her croak, but in the 25th version, you don’t see that. For all she knows this is no longer just a creepy guy but a literal ghost that just cursed her to sound like a frog! Getting rid of the thing she holds most dear! Her voice! No wonder she’s scared! Hell she starts crying! And Christine even tries to comfort her! Further proving that Christine is an angel and that the two could have developed somewhat of a working friendship/relationship.

And in her moment of terror what do the managers do? They replace her again! After all that talk about how they needed her the minute she becomes an obstacle they throw her out of the way.

She probably doesn’t have any time to process that before seeing that the phantom ACTUALLY KILLED SOMEONE! Any of that little hope she had that it was all just threats and taunts is out the window when the master of the fly ACTUALLY DIES! Hes killed and the phantom laughs and parades the corpse around like a piñata!

After that he manages to make a giant chandelier explode?!? If Carlotta doesn’t think that the phantom is an actual ghost before then she does now!

But a long while later, everything seems to go back to normal. We don’t know what happens in the meantime but we skip ahead to Carlotta managing to attend a masquerade party back at the opera. She’s all in black and back in her “don’t f with me I have the power of god and opera music on my side” vibes.

She doesn’t get much screen time here but we get three major lines from her.

“What a delight”

“Watching us and watching them”

“May its splendor never fade”

And “no more notes”

We can glean three things from this. Life has been good. The ghost has finally left her alone, and she’s got her art back. Her passion back! And I like to headcannon that she’s become a better person in this time and that’s why she’s dressed like she is.

If she was really still vain and conceited, she’d be wearing the most elegant angelic or queen-like dress she could find, but she’s instead a witch.

She’s dressed as who she used to be. She may have evolved and come to terms with sharing the spotlight hence why she says “watching US” She’s in a better place now that death isn’t breathing down her neck.

(Unrelated but also anyone notice Madame Giry with a young handsome dude? Is Giry a cougar and we just never noticed?)

And then, as everything is going good again, THE PHANTOM SHOWS UP AGAIN! And he’s literally LITERALLY dressed as the red death! A literal manifestation of Carlotta’s fears surrounding this monster of a man.

Yes Carlotta then becomes a jerk when she gets only a tiny part, which I will say she should have expected. The guy who wants you dead writes an opera and you expect him to give you a large role? Girl? You on the same planet as the rest of us? Once again, pride and vanity are kinda her big things.

Yet she still agrees to do it cause people are in actual danger now. And as she says “the things I have to do for my art!”

And yet she jumps back down the hole that she and the phantom are both in: blaming others for their problems. She thinks Christine is in line with the phantom and therefore blames her. She isn’t as… shall we say croaky about it but she still does point the finger. And yet she does seem to get a little worried when she thinks Christine is completely backing out. I mean after what happened last time Christine didn’t play the lead..

And then the phantom sends his note and once again you can see the horror and then also embarrassment when the phantom insults her acting.

Another headcannon is that yeah she does have an amazing voice there is no doubt about it, but she seems nervous about her acting. Maybe she knows her acting isn’t as good as her singing and realizes that if she messes up this time let’s just say she won’t get another chance.

(Also did the phantom really have to fat shame Piangi?)

And as the phantom addresses Christine in the note, I think Carlotta flops sides again when she hears that Christine has basically left the phantom. Hes not training her anymore. She had no idea of this. And if you can zoom in on her face in the background, you can see that Carlotta looks guilty for just yelling at this girl that’s just as terrified of the phantom as her if not more so!

And then she smirks again when Christine says no so then there goes that argument. And then again she goes back to pointing fingers but this time at Giry. Granted Giry does have some blood on her fingers so she has a point but once again EVERYONE IS SCARED OF THE PHANTOM! What makes Giry any different?! And when that pointing doesn’t work it goes back to pointing at Christine cause she can’t take into account anyone’s suffering but her own.

Then Christine had her break down and Carlotta comments “she’s mad.” But look at how she says this. Shes not making fun of her, she’s not belittling her, she’s worried about her. She sees the madness she’s experiencing is happening to others too. I think this is the final time she flips back to sanity. She realizes she’s not the only woman cursed by the phantom.

And while we can’t see much of her after Raoul’s solo we do see her almost run after a terrified Christine.

Yes she’s still jealous of Christine, we see that with the looks she gives during the rehearsal for Don Juan, but we also see something else I’ve been neglecting.

She’s an amazing friend to Piangi.

She gets upset when people correct him. He gives her support after almost being murdered and walks out with her. He pumps her up, she pumps him up. She compliments his skills and never once gets mad that he gets a role and she didn’t. I mean she’s mad she didn’t get a role but she’s still happy for Piangi! She’s willing to stand up to the phantoms writing not for herself but for her friend Piangi. And she backs down not for herself but for PIANGI. And she gets mad when he gets stressed and she gets stressed when he’s stressed and she’s a dick to everyone else but at least she’s a good friend to the few she has.

Which is why it’s probably for the best that we don’t see her react to Piangi’s death in this version.

Carlotta is definitely not perfect. But I don’t know if she’s entirely evil. She has been hurt by the phantom as much as anyone and deserves a future of peace just as much as anyone else does because that could allow her to grow.

Anyway rant over.

[saras-devotionals]

Quiet Time 9/10

What am I feeling today?

Pretty tired😅 I start nursing clinical again this morning and I didn’t get to sleep as early as I wanted to last night. But! That’s because my family wanted to celebrate my birthday🥹 they bought a tiny cake and made my favorite food and sang happy birthday to me. I felt a little bad bc I was practically gone all day with school and errands and only got to spend an hour with them and today I’ll be gone for a while too ☹️ but I love and appreciate them and honestly kinda felt a bit overwhelmed from all the birthday love yesterday😅

JOB 31 NIV

‭‭Job‬ ‭31‬:‭2‬-‭4‬ ‭NIV‬‬

“For what is our lot from God above, our heritage from the Almighty on high? Is it not ruin for the wicked, disaster for those who do wrong? Does he not see my ways and count my every step?”

Basically what Job is saying here is that God sees everything that we do and we cannot hide anything from Him. Therefore if we act in wicked ways (any way that goes against His desire for us) then the lot as a result is ruin and disaster.

Keep in mind this is Old Testament, but it still applies to us if we do not repent.

Practical: confess to sin to other people in your life to hold you accountable and repent of it!

‭‭Job‬ ‭31‬:‭5‬-‭40‬ ‭NIV‬‬

““If I have walked with falsehood or my foot has hurried after deceit— let God weigh me in honest scales and he will know that I am blameless— if my steps have turned from the path, if my heart has been led by my eyes, or if my hands have been defiled, then may others eat what I have sown, and may my crops be uprooted. “If my heart has been enticed by a woman, or if I have lurked at my neighbor’s door, then may my wife grind another man’s grain, and may other men sleep with her. For that would have been wicked, a sin to be judged. It is a fire that burns to Destruction; it would have uprooted my harvest. “If I have denied justice to any of my servants, whether male or female, when they had a grievance against me, what will I do when God confronts me? What will I answer when called to account? Did not he who made me in the womb make them? Did not the same one form us both within our mothers? “If I have denied the desires of the poor or let the eyes of the widow grow weary, if I have kept my bread to myself, not sharing it with the fatherless— but from my youth I reared them as a father would, and from my birth I guided the widow— if I have seen anyone perishing for lack of clothing, or the needy without garments, and their hearts did not bless me for warming them with the fleece from my sheep, if I have raised my hand against the fatherless, knowing that I had influence in court, then let my arm fall from the shoulder, let it be broken off at the joint. For I dreaded destruction from God, and for fear of his splendor I could not do such things. “If I have put my trust in gold or said to pure gold, ‘You are my security,’ if I have rejoiced over my great wealth, the fortune my hands had gained, if I have regarded the sun in its radiance or the moon moving in splendor, so that my heart was secretly enticed and my hand offered them a kiss of homage, then these also would be sins to be judged, for I would have been unfaithful to God on high. “If I have rejoiced at my enemy’s misfortune or gloated over the trouble that came to him— I have not allowed my mouth to sin by invoking a curse against their life— if those of my household have never said, ‘Who has not been filled with Job’s meat?’— but no stranger had to spend the night in the street, for my door was always open to the traveler— if I have concealed my sin as people do, by hiding my guilt in my heart because I so feared the crowd and so dreaded the contempt of the clans that I kept silent and would not go outside— (“Oh, that I had someone to hear me! I sign now my defense—let the Almighty answer me; let my accuser put his indictment in writing. Surely I would wear it on my shoulder, I would put it on like a crown. I would give him an account of my every step; I would present it to him as to a ruler.)— “if my land cries out against me and all its furrows are wet with tears, if I have devoured its yield without payment or broken the spirit of its tenants, then let briers come up instead of wheat and stinkweed instead of barley.” The words of Job are ended.”

Here Job is going on to list all these things and that if he ever committed a certain sin or didn’t act accordingly in a righteous way, then yes he deserves the judgment and punishment for those sins.

A list of what he spoke of that still applies to us:

Walk in falsehood and deceit

Stepping away from the “path”

Letting our hearts be led by our eyes

Hands being defiled

Heart being enticed by another woman

Denying justice to his servants

Deny the desires of the poor or let the eyes of the widow grow weary

Keeping bread to himself and not sharing it with orphans

Not warming the needy by withholding clothes/garments

Putting his trust in money

Worship the sun or the moon (astrology)

Rejoiced or gloated in an enemy’s misfortune

Cursing against someone

Concealing his sin

Using something without payment

Practical: to be mindful of all these things and to be sure that we don’t fall victim to these acts! We must act accordingly by God’s standard even though it can be incredibly difficult or desire to do the opposite 🙏🏼

[grison-in-space]

"that ability to just modify your perspective and step into the context someone else is wrestling with and listen, that's such an upsettingly rare skill for knowledge workers and healthcare workers... if you ask people why they're struggling, you can fix it and build a better process!"

You might be interested to know that when I was in pharmacy school, those patient interviewing skills mentioned by you and clockworkcrow in that reblog chain about provider burnout were taught to us as a set of techniques known as "motivational interviewing." It's not really in the scope of the personal vs systemic interventions that that reblog chain is about, but one of the revelational takeaways that I got from learning them was the idea that the healthcare provider cannot assume that their goals for care line up with the patient's; sometimes, the patient really doesn't care about the treatment or its outcomes because they have different goals of care in mind, and eliciting those goals during interviewing (because a lot of the time people are not at all articulate about what they want out of life) is a kind of ongoing step one.

I'm also curious if you or the MDs in this discussion have ever encountered ambulatory care pharmacists practicing the approaches that clockworkcrow talks about? I ask because listening to patients, identifying patient-specific blocks to care, and addressing them was something we were taught to do in pharmacy school (because our program pushed us toward ambulatory care). But since I didn't go into ambcare after graduating, I'm unsure both how much of an impact it has/how widespread such practices actually are, and whether ambcare practitioners actually, on the whole, put their money where the educators' mouths are. Can ambcare clinics actually make a systemic difference?

Oh! I had no idea they taught y'all those skills, but then I don't actually think I've ever had a conversation with a pharmacist about meds beyond a perfunctory question about whether I know what side effects there are. In general I am not used to pharmacists, doctors, or other medical professionals like psychiatrists taking a lot of time to really listen to me. Some of that is probably that all my main health complaints are things that feel normal to me and some is probably that I am a chronic minimizer--like I said in that discussion, it's a coping method.

I have never heard the term "ambulatory care" -- oh, it's outpatient care. Yeah, okay, let's use a specific physical issue: I can't run for more than about two to three without finding myself unable to breathe. This has been a thing for essentially my entire life, and in middle school we did running with heart monitors, so even apart from the physical experience of not being able to breathe and having to stop and take great heaving breaths of air, I was aware that objectively my heart rate was going up very fast no matter how hard I tried.

(We are talking "run until you start getting black spots in your vision, then walk until you can just barely breathe again, and then run, rinse and repeat. Literally the only kid slower than me was excused entirely from running because one leg was an inch shorter than the other.) No one around me seemed to think there was anything unusual about this or that I was anything besides just physically lazy, so I kind of wrote it off until my mid twenties. I mean, I'd been visibly struggling with extended physical exercise my whole life, and no one had called it remarkable yet, but friends were telling me it wasn't normal to experience those kinds of breathing issues, so...

I presented myself with this complaint to a nurse practitioner who basically told me I was just fat and needed to exercise more. I pushed past this and was grudgingly scheduled for an ecg (normal) and a peak flow test (astoundingly poor). There was no explanation presented for the peak flow except that I was out of shape and needed (guess what?) more exercise. Tried a pulmonologist, who confirmed it was not exercise induced asthma (which I had been sort of hoping, because there are fixes for that) and told me I was basically fine.

I more or less gave up until a dentist idly mentioned that my airway was very, very small and told me that micrognathia was something I should look into: my airways might be occluded. So I went to an ENT, who also immediately tried to tell me I was basically fine but did grudgingly agree to scope my airways... and discovered major blockages from my tongue (insufficient room in my jaw, so it gets shoved backwards over the airway), my nasal turbinates (swollen almost completely shut), and I forget what else. It was incredibly exciting to have a reason.

Okay, I say, what do I do with this? Exercise more? But I want to do that, I just can't breathe. I was aware that there is a surgery to artificially extend the jaw; it involves breaking the jaw and encouraging it to heal while maintaining space between the halves. So I brought this up. He was very dubious about this. I asked for a referral anyway and was referred to a plastic surgeon. The surgeon was perplexed by what I wanted to talk about and had clearly expected me to have come in for a cosmetic procedure like a nose job. Eventually I got too exhausted to follow up further; I've been meaning to resume this thing for like six years now.

Generally, my experience of doctors is that they have been trained to be suspicious of patient accounts that don't fit a very specific narrative, and that they are impatient to get on to the next thing unless you are very proactive about your own care. If you don't have a condition in mind that you can point them at without making them decide you're med seeking, they are quick to tell you that you are just making things up in your head. There are a few exceptions but I cannot underscore enough how rare I have found them to be.

And they will all tell you to exercise and lose weight as a first line of response. Not that I'm bitter.

Now, actually working in healthcare, @scientia-rex or @clockworkcrow might have more relevant commentaries than I do. But my experience in this field has not been, to put it mildly, great. Let's not even talk about my history of psychiatric care.

[prettyboykatsuki]

ari other than obviously trusting & communicating with your partner do you have any nuggets of info to look out for or thoughts specifically wrt subspace and/or aftercare in bdsm—receiving or giving?

no pressure. im doing my actual due dilligence research its just some of these sites n sources sound hella clinical and robotic and ur an actual living breathing approachable sex-positive person in comparison so i thought to ask.

hello!! i want to start by saying im deeply underqualified for such an ask. i do play and have some experience but it is minimal imo given the fact i have 1. a long term partner and 2. have had like 3-4 subs in my life to play w otherwise + im very young. im not a professional so take my words as anecdotal / personal

but on an individual level im told im a good partner so here my person to person advice / things i do for aftercare to check in on people im having sex with

the cop-out answer is that every person is different and learning to gauge your partners needs is a matter of practice and patience. not everyone needs the same thing and that's alright. it's also something u should talk about before a scene!!!

this is a given but worth mentioning but the first step is always stopping any stimulation. turning off toys, untying your partner, taking out gags - things of that nature. changing the sensation slowly is important imo. after that check on any injury and see what level of care it needs. attend to these physical, immediate needs first.

now that that is taken care of this is my more personal thing

for me usually, there's a ten minute period of me simply talking my partner down from subspace. sometimes that's praise, sometimes it's idle talk and that depends on the person. but slowly letting someone down, assuring them that they're okay and you're with them. it's more about grounding really? the intensity of a scene can be jarring even it doesn't seem that way so for me this is like... a requirement. this includes some physical touch depending on who im with!! but i usually save that for the end. like post shower and shit

sensation check-ins come after. im a sadomasochist so in a lot of cases there is a fair amount of pain involved. i like to sit my partner down on the bed and sort of run my clean hands on an injury. i don't ask for pain scale on one to ten. i prefer to ask if they still feel mobile, if the pressure i put on the area is dull or sharp, how numb they are etc. this is smth you get better at slowly and u adjust to accordingly. if there's any injuries, i take note of them and care for them in the shower

basic hydration and sustenance. this one is important to me personally for a lot of reasons but you'll see it basically in every single bdsm aftercare advice things. normally i help my partner get down a bottle of gatorade and give them a protein bar. if someone is my established partner i basically always cook for them after we have like. sex sex djksdk but you don't always have to do all that lol. just make sure those basic needs are met for BOTH OF YOU!!!!! something light is fine just no empty stomachs it will lowk make u loopy and irritable

showering / cleaning up together!! wiping them down a warm towel, getting in the shower together stuff like that. i like having a little fun skincare routine if it was a super intense scene. but i think the act of helping your partner w that is always really nice and helps establish intimacy. i normally tend to wounds and such here.

as the domme aftercare for me is usually a lot of physical touch and being told my partner enjoyed what i did to them. it's also necessary for me to be able to dote on them in some way. it's hard to explain but being able to service my partner in an intimate nonsexual way is suuuuper necessary so i don't drop. i also love to be kissed.... some soft making out yk

it seems counterintuitive but it makes me a little anxious to not be able to do those things. helping w basic care and things like that are really important to me and someone letting me do that for me is also very important to me. i also like being able to stim afterwards w a chewy and zone out while my partners hangs out in my arms and we have like parallel play time.

i have different routines w every person ive ever been with but these are some of the more basic universals. again everyone is different. how intensive aftercare depends on how intensive a scene but i normally hit these four every time, just more or less in depth depending. i hope this helps you in some way!!!

[sanddusted-wisteria]

A Builder, a Researcher, and a Rooftop, Ch. 15: Literature Review

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Research Question (RQ) 1: What is the root cause of the following symptoms: accelerated heart rate (independent of physical or mental stress), unusual warmth in the general torso region, loss or redirection of mental focus?

Qi stared at his open journal, idly tapping his pencil on the table and propping his chin up with his free hand.

His visit to Dr. Fang had been fruitless. The doctor had insisted that he was perfectly healthy (though he firmly recommended that he sleep more). Aside from some odd squawking from the bird (“Oh, are you nervous, honey? Squark. It’s okay, don’t be scared. Awk! Just say it, dummy!”), he’d gotten nothing from the clinic. So he was back to square one, and without any help.

It had been at least two hours since he came back, and despite his usual morning dose of tea (plus an extra cup for good measure), he still couldn’t think of anything. He huffed a sigh, rubbing at his still-puffy eyes. Times like these weren’t uncommon; when he’d get stuck on ideas or designs with no discernable way forward. Usually he’d at least be able to walk away from the problem for a while and work on something else. But this time, getting stuck on a problem was causing a total mental blockade. His mind wasn’t able to produce anything, but he couldn’t bring himself to think about anything else, either.

At least the builder had picked up their blankets while he was out. Who knows how much worse his internal deadlock would be if he had to deal with them being here?

Qi sighed again and brought his pencil back to the page. He was hoping to tackle each of his questions in successive order, but perhaps with the mental block, he should consider multiple questions at once.

RQ2: How and why is the builder associated with the aforementioned symptoms?

Even though both his intuition and an overwhelming amount of circumstantial evidence pointed to them, he couldn’t just assume that they were the root cause. Needlessly blaming them for his problems would be poor practice and unproductive. Also, they would not take very kindly to that.

Perhaps, if he could aggregate any and all observational information he recalled about the builder, he could pinpoint something more specific that was causing his symptoms.

He drew a simple two-column table on the page, labeling the left side “Symptoms”, and the right side “Obs. abt Builder”.

The symptoms column was at least easy to fill out.

Accelerated heart rate (unknown cause)

Warm sensation in general torso region (esp. heart and stomach)

Unusual dreams?

Constant distraction

Disruption of normal thought patterns

Now for the harder part, the observation column. Not necessarily because Qi was lacking in information, but because he had absolutely no idea where to start. Well, maybe with the obvious ones…

Skilled, efficient builder

Regularly comes to research center for diagram requests, pleasantries, and stargazing

Semi-routine schedule; deviates according to demand

Amicable conversationalist

Willing to assist townsfolk for both large and small matters

Those were the basics; things that anyone with rudimentary pattern recognition could see. What about the less obvious things? Things that not everyone would be able to see, or at least not right away.

Skilled relic hunter

Shows interest in relics, science, and technology

Procures many data disks and power stones, often donates to research center

Proficient cook

Engaging storyteller

Creative thinker

His hand was moving faster now, coasted by momentum, writing out words before his mind could even process them.

Inquisitive

Observant

Generous

Proactive

Tenacious

Persistent

Courteous

Wonderful

Qi froze. What was that last one?

Wonderful

His eyes bore into the page, scanning the lines, seeing the grain in the paper where the graphite couldn’t quite mark. That was indeed his handwriting, calling the builder wonderful.  

He took his hands off the journal and reread everything he just wrote. The right column of the table trailed way past the end of the center dividing line, all the way to the bottom of the page and straight onto the next. He read over the extensive list from top to bottom, page to page, over and over. A frown grew deeper on his face the more times he read it. 

Maybe the problem wasn’t only caused by the builder. Judging by this list, perhaps it had something to do with Qi and his perceptions instead. This was getting complicated fast. Feeling a tad uneasy, he wrote down his next research question:

RQ3: What are my attitudes toward the builder?

Right as he finished dotting the question mark, his mind kicked into high gear, bringing forth memories of quiet nights and the smell of tea.

I find them reliable.

When they first arrived in town, they established themselves as a reliable builder within a week. Far more reliable than nearly every other member of the Commerce Guild. Even outside official commissions, he’d come to rely on them for other things, like relic excavation.

I’m curious about them. I find them intriguing.

They had always been a curious individual. How could he not be intrigued by someone who single-handedly managed to triple the output of the Commerce Guild in a month? That curiosity only grew when they started coming over to stargaze. He still had no idea why they decided to come. He’s not even sure if they knew, either. But what he did know is why he let them keep coming, week after week.

I enjoy their company.

Putting it down in writing caused an odd shift in his stomach. Hm. Qi quickly added that to the list of symptoms. But regardless, it was true. He hadn’t really spent too much time with anyone in Sandrock since he moved here, and what little time he did spend was usually limited to business. He thought that the builder would’ve just been another regular client to add to the roster. But soon enough, he found himself enjoying the company of another for the first time in years. So much so that…

I don’t want to inconvenience them.

The builder was always willing to do things for him. Building machines he designed for his own personal use, showing concern over his well-being, providing him with power stones and relics and nourishment, all without so much as a second thought. All of it was immensely helpful when added up over time. He wished there was a better way of expressing his thanks to them. The very least he could do was ensure their efforts weren’t wasted. The last thing he and his habits needed to be was an inconvenience.

I hope they retain a positive outlook of me.

Qi stared at the line. It shouldn’t have been a statement that dumbfounded him, but somehow, it did. It never really crossed his mind, he supposed. He was very aware of the last two statements, but for whatever reason, he never put two and two together. Indeed, he hoped that the builder thought well of him.

I feel at ease holding any conversation with them.

At first, he never cared much to talk to them beyond commission and research talk. But soon, they had started showing interest in astronomy, which gave him some motivation to converse more. He’d been more cautious when the topic of the Mobile Suit started to come up, nervous that he would be subject to mockery. But even with some light teasing at first, Qi quickly found himself comfortable talking to them about it. Not to mention how he so effortlessly divulged some of his earliest, most precious memories, something that he was pretty sure that no-one outside Mint and his family knew.

No matter what the subject was, even those that made other people’s eyes glaze over or those that were deeply personal, the builder always had an open ear and an open mind.

…But it wasn’t just in conversation, was it?

I feel at ease whenever I’m around them.

There were many stargazing nights where hardly any words were exchanged. A simple “hello,” maybe, but nothing else. Just the two of them, the stars, and the silence. And yet, he still felt the same way as he did when they were talking. Unrestrained and unrestricted. At peace and at rest.

Something clicked in Qi’s head. That felt…familiar, somehow.

His dream. He felt it there, too.

Because memories of dreams rapidly decayed soon after waking, he’d been mentally rehearsing the events in it ever since he woke up. But he hardly needed to struggle recalling that undeniable feeling of ease when they appeared. Not to mention, how it only managed to morph and amplify when they…when…

Qi swallowed.

RQ4: What kind of reactions do the builder and their behaviors trigger in me?

His heart pounded and his stomach churned. His grip on the pencil tightened, but still kept frozen in place. Somehow, someway, he knew the answer straight away without needing to put it into words. But nonetheless, the tip of the pencil met the page again and slowly wrote out the answer, plain and simple:

Ease

Fascination

Gratitude

Happiness

L

Qi furiously shook his head. No. Impossible. That wasn’t what it was. All these symptoms, these thoughts, it couldn’t be, they…

…were a perfect match, weren’t they?

With unsteady legs, Qi got out of his seat and numbly went over to his bookshelves. Shaky hands scanned the spines and flipped the occasional book open to check. Finally, he found what he was looking for: a medium-sized volume with a cool-blue cover: Refine My Heart, Build Our Love.

He’d gotten it a few weeks ago with his last book order. As for why he’d gotten it, he still wasn’t too sure. It was definitely for…research, though. Of course it was. He devoured the book in a single day when he got it. A perfectly decent novel, better written than some of the others he had in his collection (which were also purely for research, thank you very much). He’d hoped that through reading it, he’d figure out exactly why he felt compelled to get it, but no such revelation came.

He skimmed through it again, rereading different sections. As he relived the protagonist falling in love with their builder sweetheart, he caught glimpses of their thoughts and reactions. So many of them were similar to his symptoms: an odd fixation, funny feelings in the heart and in the stomach, bursts of exuberance… It was practically one-to-one.

And it didn’t stop with the protagonist, either. As his eye caught segments about their sweetheart, his mind couldn’t help but make some…choice substitutions. The attributes of the builder character started to morph in his head, transforming into features he was a little more familiar with.

Familiar bright eyes, familiar strong arms, the familiar curve of a familiar smile…

And a familiar voice, declaring their love to the protagonist in the sweetest whisper.

Qi snapped the book shut with clammy hands, heart pounding faster than ever.

But even so, that voice still echoed in his mind throughout the recesses of his memories, just as warm and honey-sweet.

“Aw, were you worried about me?”

“Hey. Thanks. That helped. A lot.”

“I know. But I wanted to.”

“It feels nice to know that you’re thinking of me.”

“I’m glad you let me share that joy with you.”

“I…I care about you, you know?”

Another jolt spiked through Qi’s stomach. Last night…

He’d been so preoccupied with trying to remember and analyze his dream that the hazy, sleep-deprived memories of their conversation just before had completely drained from his memory. But the echoes of their voice suddenly dredged them back up, bringing them back into alarmingly clear focus.

He remembered how unsteady he felt, waiting for the builder to arrive, the sound of their footsteps signaling that his efforts for them hadn’t been in vain.

He remembered how angry they sounded when he explained the situation to them.

He remembered the unsteadiness only growing as he laid down, head lolling to the side.

He remembered how the edge in the builder’s voice and the fog in his mind drove him to admit his worries.

He remembered their smile and the absolute sincerity in their voice. How they quashed his greatest worry with a few simple words. And suddenly being awash in an emotion he had no idea how to describe or name.

It had flooded his nervous system with a most exuberant sensation, tingling all down his spine and into the very tips of his fingers. It stirred his stomach and pulled at his heart, as if determined to change his very anatomy. It stoked that unusual warmth inside him again, almost like a tactile glow.

And then, having spent the very last of its energy creating that incredible rush, his body finally succumbed to fatigue.

The last thing Qi could remember was drifting off into oblivion, cradled by warmth from within.

All that…to lead up to the present moment. Where Qi could finally put a name to what that unknown feeling was.

RQ5: What is the answer to all of the aforementioned research questions?

Pencil met paper, and Qi’s eyes met his long-awaited conclusion:

Love.

With the word finally solidified both on the page and in his mind, Qi felt a sense of release, despite his pulse still hammering. The rush of finding a difficult answer, of making a discovery…he knew it well. Although this time, it was compounded with…something else. He didn’t need to think through what it was.

Now that he had his conclusion, Qi just had one last thing to consider to wrap up this study: further work.

There was only one follow-up question to come from such a conclusion, which Qi threw up his arms and shouted into the empty research center:

“Now what?!”

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[cnacertificationprogram]

Open Your Healthcare Career: A Step-by-Step Guide to Becoming a CNA Online

Unlock Your Healthcare Career: A Step-by-Step Guide to Becoming a ‌CNA Online

Unlock ‌Your Healthcare⁣ Career: A Step-by-Step Guide to Becoming a CNA Online

As the healthcare industry continues to grow, the demand for qualified professionals is higher than ever. Becoming a Certified Nursing Assistant (CNA) is a rewarding ‌path that provides an entry ⁢point into ‍this vital sector. This article will guide you step-by-step on how to become a CNA online, highlighting‍ the benefits, tips, and⁢ resources you need to⁢ succeed.

What is ‍a CNA?

A Certified Nursing Assistant (CNA) plays‌ a crucial role in​ healthcare teams, providing ​direct‌ patient care and support.⁤ CNAs assist with daily living‍ activities such as:

Bathing and grooming

Feeding

Mobility assistance

Taking vital ​signs

The role is vital for maintaining⁣ patient comfort and safety, making this position both impactful and rewarding.

Benefits⁤ of Becoming a CNA Online

Choosing to pursue your CNA ⁣certification online offers numerous advantages, including:

Flexibility: Study at your own pace, fitting coursework into your schedule.

Cost-Effective: ⁣ Online programs often have lower tuition fees compared to traditional colleges.

Comprehensive Resources: Access to a range‍ of learning materials ⁢including videos, quizzes, and forums.

Job ⁢Readiness: Programs are ‍designed to prepare you ​for the workforce efficiently.

Step-by-Step Guide to Becoming a CNA Online

Step ⁤1: Research State Requirements

Every state in the U.S. has ⁣different⁢ requirements for CNA certification. It’s important to check your state’s⁣ regulations to understand the necessary prerequisites, including:

Minimum age requirement (typically 18 years)

Educational prerequisites (high school diploma or GED)

Background checks

Step 2: Select an Accredited Online CNA Program

Look for accredited online programs that meet your state’s course requirements. Consider the following when choosing a program:

Accreditation status

Cost and financial aid options

Course reviews and⁤ student testimonials

Job placement support

Step 3: Complete​ Required Coursework

Online CNA programs‍ typically cover essential⁤ topics, including:

Anatomy and Physiology

Basic Nursing Skills

Patient Care and Safety

Communication Skills

Most programs also include hands-on clinical training ⁣that may require attending local healthcare facilities.

Step 4: Pass the CNA Exam

After completing your coursework, you’ll need to pass the ⁣CNA certification exam. ⁤This consists​ of⁢ two parts:

Written Examination: Tests your‍ knowledge of patient care and CNA‌ responsibilities.

Practical Skills Assessment: ⁣ Demonstrates your ability to perform essential‌ CNA tasks.

Step 5: Obtain Your Certification and Start Your Job Search

Once you pass the exam, you can apply for certification through your⁤ state’s nursing board. Upon receiving your CNA license, ‌you can begin searching for ‌job⁢ opportunities!

Practical Tips for Success

Stay Organized: Keep track of important dates and requirements throughout your training.

Network: Join online forums or local healthcare groups to connect with ⁣other CNAs.

Use Online Resources: Leverage free⁢ resources like‍ study guides, flashcards, and practice tests.

Case ‍Studies: Real-Life ⁣Experiences

Case Study 1: Sarah’s Journey to CNA

At age 25, Sarah decided to switch ‌careers ⁢from retail to healthcare. She enrolled in an online CNA program that allowed her to study while working part-time. Within​ four months, she completed her coursework and passed the certification exam. Today, she works in a local hospital and loves her new career.

Case Study 2: James Balances Work and Study

James, a full-time parent, leveraged online classes to become a CNA. ⁣He used late nights ‍for studying and practical training at a nearby clinic on weekends. His dedication paid off, and he now works⁢ flexible ‍hours to balance his family and career.

Conclusion

Becoming a Certified Nursing‌ Assistant is a fulfilling career choice that opens the‍ door to many opportunities in healthcare. By following this step-by-step guide and using the resources available‌ to you, you can successfully transition into this⁤ essential ⁤role.‍ Embrace the journey of‍ becoming ​a CNA online, and you will ‌unlock a world‌ of possibilities ⁣in the⁢ healthcare field. Your future​ in a rewarding career‍ begins today!

https://cnacertificationprogram.net/open-your-healthcare-career-a-step-by-step-guide-to-becoming-a-cna-online/

[alicevgcna]

Open Your Future with CNA Certification in New York: Everything You Need to Know

Title: Unlock Your Future with CNA Certification in New York: Everything⁢ You‌ Need to Know

Meta Title: Comprehensive Guide⁤ to CNA ⁤Certification in New York

Meta Description: Learn how to kickstart your ⁤career in the ⁣healthcare‍ industry by obtaining your CNA certification ⁣in New York. ⁤Find out the requirements, benefits, and practical tips to become a successful Certified Nursing Assistant.

Introduction: Are you looking for a rewarding ⁢career in ⁤the healthcare industry? Becoming a Certified Nursing Assistant (CNA) in New York could be the perfect‌ starting point for you. ⁢CNAs play a crucial role‍ in providing basic care to patients in various healthcare settings. If you’re passionate about helping others and want to make a difference in ‍people’s lives, pursuing CNA‍ certification in New York could⁣ be a ‍great choice.

In this comprehensive‍ guide, we​ will walk ‌you ‌through everything you‍ need to ‌know about unlocking your ⁣future with CNA certification in New York. From the requirements and benefits to practical ‍tips⁣ and success stories, we’ve got you covered.

Requirements for CNA Certification in New York: To⁤ become a⁣ Certified Nursing Assistant in ⁢New York,‌ you must meet certain requirements. ‍Here are‍ the key​ steps you need to ⁤follow:

1.⁢ Complete a state-approved‌ CNA training program: You ⁢must enroll ⁣in a training program that is⁤ approved ‌by the New⁣ York State Department of Health. These⁢ programs typically include classroom instruction ‍as well as hands-on clinical experience.

2. Pass‌ the CNA certification exam: Once you have completed your⁣ training ⁣program, ‌you will need ⁣to pass the CNA certification ⁤exam. This exam⁢ consists of⁢ a written portion and ⁢a ​skills assessment test.

3. Obtain your CNA license: After passing‍ the certification exam, you will receive‌ your CNA license from the New‌ York State Department of Health. This ‍license is required to practice as a Nursing Assistant⁤ in the state.

Benefits of CNA Certification in New​ York: There are several ‍benefits to obtaining your CNA certification in New York. Some of ‌the key ‌advantages include:

1. Job security and‍ growth ​opportunities: The demand for CNAs is expected to grow in the coming years, providing ample job opportunities in various healthcare settings.

2.‌ Competitive salary ‍and ‌benefits: CNAs⁤ in New York can earn competitive salaries and may ‍also receive ‍benefits such as‌ health⁣ insurance and paid ‌time⁢ off.

3. Fulfilling work experience:‍ As a CNA, you will have the ‌opportunity to make ⁢a real difference in the ⁢lives ‌of patients by providing essential care and support.

Practical Tips for Success: To succeed as a⁤ Certified Nursing Assistant in New York, consider the following tips:

1. ‌Stay current⁤ with ‍your‌ training: Continuously update your skills⁤ and⁤ knowledge to provide the best possible care to patients.

2. Develop good ⁢communication skills: Effective⁢ communication is key in healthcare, so work‍ on‍ developing ‌strong communication ​skills with both patients and colleagues.

3.‍ Build a strong support network: Surround yourself with ‍supportive​ peers and mentors who can offer​ guidance​ and encouragement throughout your career.

Case Study: Emily’s Journey to Becoming a CNA Emily always had a passion for helping others and decided‌ to ‌pursue a career as a Certified Nursing Assistant in‍ New York. She completed her training program and passed the certification ⁣exam⁤ with flying colors. Today,⁢ Emily⁣ works in a busy hospital, where she provides compassionate ⁣care to patients and makes a positive‍ impact on their⁢ lives⁣ every day.

Conclusion: Becoming a Certified ⁢Nursing Assistant in New⁤ York ​can be a⁢ fulfilling⁢ and rewarding career choice. By obtaining your CNA certification, you can unlock exciting job opportunities, competitive salaries, and the chance to make a‍ real difference in the lives of others. Follow the steps outlined in⁣ this guide, ‍stay current with your training, and⁣ develop strong communication⁢ skills to ⁢succeed as ‌a CNA in New York. Your future awaits​ – start your journey ⁢to CNA certification ​today!

https://cnaclassesonline.net/open-your-future-with-cna-certification-in-new-york-everything-you-need-to-know/

[webscarlet]

Budget-Friendly Dental Care: Tips and Tricks for Salt Lake City Residents

Finding affordable dental care in Salt Lake City can be a challenge, especially if you’re trying to balance quality with cost. At Grandview Dental, we understand that maintaining your oral health shouldn't break the bank. In this article, we'll explore various strategies and tips to help you access budget-friendly dental services without compromising on care. Let's take a closer look at how you can keep your smile bright and your wallet happy.

Understanding the Importance of Regular Dental Care

Regular dental check-ups are more than just a clean slate for your teeth; they're an essential part of maintaining overall health. You might be surprised to learn that oral health is linked to heart disease, diabetes, and even respiratory issues. The mouth is a gateway to the body, and neglecting it can lead to unforeseen health problems. Regular visits to the dentist can help catch potential issues early, saving you from costly procedures down the line.

At Grandview Dental, we emphasize preventative care to help our clients maintain their oral health. By focusing on early detection and regular maintenance, you can avoid more serious and expensive treatments in the future.

Choosing the Right Salt Lake City Dentist

Selecting a dentist who aligns with both your health needs and financial situation is crucial. But how do you choose the right one in a city bustling with options? Start by looking for dental practices that offer a range of services, from routine cleanings to more specialized treatments, at competitive prices.

Grandview Dental takes pride in providing a comprehensive suite of services tailored to meet diverse dental needs while keeping affordability in mind. With our professional team, you can be assured that we prioritize your oral health and financial considerations equally.

Affordable Dental Services and Payment Plans

You might think that quality dental care is out of reach on a tight budget, but many practices, including Grandview Dental, offer flexible payment plans and discounts. These can include sliding scale fees, monthly payment options, or discounts for upfront payments. Some clinics also provide memberships that offer routine cleanings and exams at a reduced rate.

Don't hesitate to discuss payment options with your dentist. Transparency about costs and payment structures can help alleviate financial stress and make dental care more accessible.

Preventative Measures to Save Money

Preventative care is your first line of defense against costly dental procedures. Simple actions like brushing twice daily, flossing regularly, and using mouthwash can significantly reduce plaque and prevent cavities. Incorporating these into your daily routine can stave off issues that require more intensive treatment.

In addition to home care, regular dental check-ups and cleanings at Grandview Dental ensure that any potential problems are caught early. By investing in routine care, you save money and protect your oral health in the long run.

Exploring Dental Insurance Options

Insurance can play a pivotal role in making dental care affordable. Understanding your insurance plan and its benefits can save you a lot of money. Many plans cover preventive services like cleanings and exams at little to no cost, which can be a significant relief for your budget.

At Grandview Dental, we work with a variety of insurance providers to help maximize your benefits. If you’re unsure about what your plan covers, give us a call at 801-467-4874, and our staff will guide you through your options.

Community Resources and Low-Cost Clinics

Salt Lake City offers several community resources and clinics that provide low-cost or free dental services. These are often run by local charities or educational institutions and can be a great help for those without insurance.

These clinics may offer basic dental procedures at reduced rates, making them an excellent option for budget-conscious individuals. While these services might be limited, they often cover essential care like cleanings, fillings, and extractions.

The Role of Technology in Affordable Dental Care

Advancements in dental technology have not only improved the quality of care but also made it more cost-effective. Digital X-rays, laser treatments, and CAD/CAM technology for crown fabrications are just a few examples of how modern technology can reduce treatment times and costs.

At Grandview Dental, we leverage the latest technology to provide efficient and precise care that saves both time and money. By investing in cutting-edge equipment, we ensure our services are both top-notch and affordable.

Why Choose Grandview Dental?

Choosing Grandview Dental means opting for a practice dedicated to balancing quality with affordability. Our team is committed to making dental care accessible for all Salt Lake City residents. We offer personalized care plans designed to fit your budget while addressing your unique dental needs.

With us, you get more than just a service; you become part of a community that values your health and satisfaction. Whether it’s through our expert curation of dental plans, comprehensive services, or engaging community initiatives, we strive to make every visit an enriching experience.

Take the Next Step Towards Affordable Dental Care

Don't wait to take control of your oral health. With the right strategies and support from Grandview Dental, budget-friendly dental care is within reach. Call us today at 801-467-4874 to learn more about our services, or schedule your first appointment. Join our community of satisfied clients and discover how affordable a healthy smile can be.

[mhsargent]

Adventures in Brain Surgery

July 2, 2024

Greetings to all our Friends and Family,

Some of this will be news for some of you, and some of this will be repeat information for some others. Thank you all in advance for taking the time to read.

On Monday, June 24th, 2024, a sizable brain tumor was discovered in Carol Anne’s frontal lobe.  It was removed on Thursday, June 27th. I thought I would try to share the basics of the story of how we got here with all of you.  I know there are some of you in our lives that have not heard all the news yet, so we wanted to share the story with everyone on social media.  This way we can continue to share with everyone what we can expect over the next weeks and months of Carol Anne’s recovery as we discover it ourselves.

For the past 6 to 8 months, Carol Anne has been complaining about not feeling like herself, although that feeling has been creeping up on her for much longer than that. As we take the time to reflect on the impact this unknown tumor has been having on Carol Anne, we are becoming aware that she has probably been affected for at least 18 months, if not longer.  

We started to become aware that something unusual was happening to Carol Anne at least 8 weeks ago, but it was hard to identify exactly what. Historically, Carol Anne has struggled with mental health issues around depression.  Indeed, this has been a primary diagnosis for her for more than 10 years.  As a result, both Carol Anne and I were attributing her recent struggles with her confidence, her mood, and her choices to her mental health struggles  

As a number of these symptoms increased in severity, her behaviour was increasingly uncharacteristic.  Because this had been relatively gradual, we were still working on the assumption that this was mental health related, combined with the effects of perimenopause/menopause.  Carol Anne worked diligently to try to connect with doctors and health professionals to get some sort of diagnosis and assistance, but the state of health care in BC is in bad shape, and family doctors are few and far between, so Carol Anne continued to make her best guesses and treat herself with random Telus Health doctors.  She started taking time off work to focus on her health, but everything seemed to be getting worse.

Right around my birthday, May 23rd, things started to get worse, faster. She started losing time - she would forget what time it was; she would lose herself in her phone or tablet playing the same game over and over; she would go on online shopping sprees without thinking through what she was buying.  She started losing situational awareness, and we started to have to watch her carefully when we were out.  Her texting became increasingly erratic.  Her attempts to solve problems (her greatest strength) became incomplete, ill-timed, and poorly communicated, if at all.  Additionally, she started falling frequently, and when she fell, she could not figure out how to move her body to right herself.  She had a harder and harder time both getting her body to respond and responding to her body. [Included in this have been problems of bladder control.]  She, of course, was still thinking all of this was her own fault and that she needed to be doing something to get better - better diet, more exercise, etc.

Without going into all the specific details, she was less and less herself, and her choices were increasingly suspect.  Through all of this we still did not have any clear medical help except for the specific help Carol Anne could ask for from naturopaths and clinic doctors.  That help, though, was based on her previous diagnosis of depression and our own incomplete self-diagnosis, not on a medical diagnosis, so they were really only providing what she was asking for.

In the end, in desperation, we turned to private health care and paid much money to join a private practice. {A brief aside - Fortunately, this was not a “pay for a doctor visit” kind of practice, but rather a practice committed to providing a team of health care support that is interested as much in preventative medical care as they are with responding to acute medical symptoms.  We cannot emphasize enough how happy we are with the Beta Team-Based Healthcare group.  We would not have ended up with the care we received, and will be receiving, if Carol Anne had not found them. Setting aside the very Canadian cultural aversion to paying for personal health care out of pocket, we would like to encourage everyone to support this kind of health care.]

On Monday, June 24th, after a weekend with lots of falls, physical accidents, too much lost time, too much loss of communication from Carol Anne, and some very questionable choices, I took Carol Anne in to see the doctor with me describing my observations.  After a couple of very brief tests, the doctor strongly recommended we go to the hospital and get a CT scan right away.  Additionally, he insisted strongly that we go to the Victoria General Hospital, as that’s where the neuroscience team is based.  We proceeded to do this.

[Another brief aside - We cannot say enough good things about all of the staff, doctors, and nurses who work at the Victoria General Hospital.  The level of care, compassion, and dedication we received over the 6 days in hospital was amazing. Understanding that this care was delivered in spite of being under-funded, under-resourced, and over-worked makes the care even more impressive and us all the more grateful to have received it.]

We were seen without too much delay, fortunately, and the immediate results of CT scan initiated a series of health related actions that saw Carol Anne admitted to the hospital through the ER.  The ER doctor, sometime in the middle of the 3rd period of game 7, while we were parked in the ER hallway, explained to us that they spotted a very large tumor sitting on the executive function part of her brain, and it was large enough to also be affecting her motor control functions on both sides of her body.  An MRI was scheduled to more exactly identify the extent of the tumor and to check to see if it is a primary tumor or if there was yet more to worry about.  (Turns out it is the primary tumor - they have found nothing else at this point.)

So then, starting that Monday, she was placed under acute observation on the neuroscience floor while we waited for her surgery slot.  Carol Anne was in a low-stimulation ward, and her symptoms had progressed quite far by that point, so she had to wait without any electronic devices. This was not her favourite way to wait - she tried every tactic her tumor-clouded self could think of to get someone to bring her home. Fortunately, we all wanted her to stay in line for surgery more that we we wanted her home.

 Thursday, June 27th was, finally, surgery day.  After a bit of worry through the day because Carol Anne was accidentally fed breakfast that morning, she was wheeled away to the OR Thursday afternoon.  After several hours of (necessary) silence, I received a call from the surgeon.  

(Another aside - I would like to encourage all doctors to mentally prepare the first sentence to waiting family members so that there is no pause between greeting and the first sentence.  I cannot begin to express how many thoughts passed through my head in the 1.5 seconds between “Hello, Morgan? Dr. Fleetwood here.”  and “The surgery went very well!”  I lost years of my life in that 1.5 seconds)

The surgeon was thrilled with how the surgery went.  I could hear it in his voice on the phone, and Carol Anne says he was bouncing in the recovery area as he was talking.  I think the appropriate word here would be “chuffed.” 

They got everything that they could see!  It went quickly and easily, with a minimum of bleeding, so she didn’t need a transfusion. However, he emphasized that, of course, they cannot see the microscopic stuff. Further to that, he was very optimistic that, having drained the fluid around the cyst, a lot of her really extreme symptoms would start to clear up pretty quickly, and he's very optimistic about her recovery on that front. He said nothing went strange in the surgery. He was so very very happy with the way the whole thing went. 

Carol Anne had a follow up MRI scan Friday morning, in order to confirm that they have, in fact, gotten everything that they can get. As of Tuesday, July 2, we have not yet seen the results. 

Since the surgery, Caroline has been feeling much better and increasingly herself again. The first two days after the surgery saw a great and dramatic improvement in Carol Anne. Her motor functions have become much more in control,  she's much more aware of the difference between how she is now and how she was before the surgery, and she is continuing to discover the extent of how badly she had been affected by this tumor.. Her mood is improving, although she is going through bouts of anger, understandably, about how long it took to get treatment given how quickly she started improving since the surgery. 

We haven't seen the surgeon since the morning after the surgery, but we have appointments that are already being set up for the next couple of weeks to follow up with many doctors, occupational therapists, physiotherapists, nutritionists, and all sorts of other specialists yet to be named. She was discharged on Sunday, and she is now home and learning how to recover from the comfort of home. She is seeing visitors!  If you’d like to see Carol Anne, please send us a text and we’ll be happy to see you.

I know there are probably many questions that aren't being answered by this post, but that is either because we don't yet have the answers or because we're not yet ready to share. 

There is much physical and mental recuperation that all of us need to go through over the next weeks and months, but we are grateful that this is the challenge we have to face now rather than something else. 

We will try to post periodic updates once we've settled into routines at home and we have more news to share. This experience  has reinforced for us just how much attention and reform needs to be dedicated to the fundamental support systems of our society (health, education, shelter, and food security.) Whatever our future holds, advocating for an integrated vision of change will be a big part of it. 

In the meantime, we are turning our attention to Kathleen's and Matthew's wedding and upcoming move! We, all of us, are looking forward to seeing friends and family and sharing in celebration after this incredibly challenging period.

With love and appreciation,  

Carol Anne and Morgan

[hiltonheadplasticsurgery]

All You Need to Know About Plastic Surgery Makeup

You might want to resume your regular schedule right away after having cosmetic surgery. If you still have obvious swelling, bruising, or incision marks, it could be challenging to return to work or participate in typical social activities. A delay of a few days, weeks, or even months is possible. However, you are not required to wait at home. Both men and women can boost their confidence while hiding the temporary side effects of surgery by using plastic surgery makeup products and techniques.

Your surgeon can go over the various products you have access to and demonstrate how to use them. Inquire of him or her when you can resume applying makeup following surgery. One or two days after surgery, the majority of patients are able to start wearing makeup. Before covering incision lines, it may be necessary to wait until the wound has fully recovered and the stitches have been taken out.

At Hilton Head Plastic Surgery & MedSpa, Jane Iredale's nourishing supplements, natural skincare products, and multipurpose mineral makeup are high-performance, clean, and cruelty-free, providing practical, focused treatments for a lovely, healthy complexion.

Camouflage Products

Since fragrance-free camouflage cosmetics are less likely to have an unfavorable impact on your skin, your surgeon might advise wearing them. However, you might be able to keep applying your regular makeup. To ensure the highest level of sterility, only buy brand-new goods with brand-new applicators.

Be it chin and cheek implant or any other South Carolina plastic surgery, the board certified plastic surgeons at Hilton Head Plastic Surgery & MedSpa can deliver the best results. We can also assist if you’re looking for a Hilton skin clinic.

Basic Types of Camouflage Makeup Concepts

One can conceal bruises and incision lines by employing camouflage. Contrary to conventional foundation makeup, concealers are thicker. Avoid applying concealer too close to your eyes and look for a concealer that closely matches your skin tone. It would be preferable to use a basic fluid foundation, color corrector, or eye makeup in this area due to the thin, sensitive skin there.

The appearance of skin that is more red or yellow than usual can be corrected. Color correctors with a lavender or green undertone can be used to cover up yellow tones.

Swelling can be concealed by contouring. It works by applying foundation plastic surgery makeup that is both lighter and darker than the foundation shade you typically wear. While the darker one will conceal some facial features, the lighter one will highlight others. These colors need to be mixed to give the appearance of angles without showing any aesthetic stripes. It could take some practice, but if you get the hang of it, you can reduce facial puffiness with ease.

Always take off camouflage cosmetics before going to bed because they are typically thicker and more adhesive than regular makeup. When using these cosmetics, moisturize at night and use a washing cream, toner, and toner without alcohol. You get in contact with Hilton Head Plastic Surgery & MedSpa for plastic surgery makeup.

[inner-wellness]

The 9 Best Chiropractors In Toronto

Chiropractic care is an important part of a wholesome way of life and may help you achieve optimum health. Recovering from Injuries requires more than simply rest and drugs. They require a rigorously conducted chiropractic clinic treatment for rehabilitation and pain aid. Knead Wellness is the best reply to the chiropractic clinic close to me query and in addition has been leading the Toronto chiropractor market with accredited providers.

Since my first go to, I really have already began feeling some enchancment and would definitely advocate her practice. Dr Bober and her workers are knowledgeable, professional and so pleasant. I immediately felt that I was in good arms the second I walked into the clinic.

Chiropractic therapies are covered by Employee Health Plans, MVA (Car accident insurance), and WSIB (Workplace insurance). Our chiropractic treatment classes are booked for minutes of one-on-one time in a private remedy room. Your chiropractic therapy session is complemented by an exercise program monitored by certainly one of our exercise therapists. Many patients who visit us for one criticism are stunned to search out that many seemingly unrelated points additionally get higher after they start with care. When your nervous system is functioning properly, your entire physique can keep in a healthy stability, precisely as it was designed to. Our built-in group of healthcare professionals works collectively to assist as many families as attainable discover their physique's capability to heal itself.

I at all times leave with a healthier spine and a smile on my face. If you might have any questions about how we are ready to serve you or your family, about our chiropractor or different companies provided here within the London area, please get in touch with us and we will respond quickly. In addition to chiropractic, we're happy to offer extra providers, together with Acupuncture, & Custom Orthotics. If you wish to attain optimum health and peak performance ranges no matter your age, our follow shall be a fantastic match for you. They aren’t medical doctors, however have accomplished many years of training so that they can efficiently treat issues related to your physique.

If you may have another spine, muscle, nerve, and bone accidents or circumstances or want a basic examination, don’t hesitate to contact us. Here are a few of toronto chiropractor the mostly requested queries about chiropractic care. Contact Massage Addict Etobicoke Lake Shore and Parklawn, we'll be more than pleased to help.

Following the consultation, Dr.Hannikainen will carry out a comprehensive examination of your backbone and nervous system; if x-rays are necessary they may even be taken right now. Please fill out the form beneath, including all the required fields, and obtain precedence new affected chiropractic massage person scheduling. Dr. Ken is superior at his job and I really enjoy the customer service of all the staff at this location. Everyone is basically pleasant and considerate and also you all the time feel like you are being taken care of.

But nowadays, there’s actually plenty of overlap within the types of circumstances that both these health professionals deal with and the remedy strategies they use. When the atlas is out of its proper place, the top moves off centre of the body. More weight shifts to one side of the body than one other. If the atlas can be rotated out of place it could possibly twist the entire spinal structure, including the pelvis, so that one leg appears shorter than one other (see illustration). Not having your atlas corrected to revive physique balance is like persevering with to drive a car that is misaligned. If you retain changing the tires, and never have the automotive aligned, you’ll simply be wasting your cash.

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Gary Null’s Show Notes 02 21 23 P

If you listen to Gary’s show, you know that he begins with the latest findings in natural approaches to health and nutrition. Starting this week, we will make some of those findings available each weekday to subscribers to the Gary Null Newsletter.

Study suggests fructose could drive Alzheimer's disease

Meditation builds brain cells, Harvard study shows proof

Sunshine Vitamin Regenerates and Detoxifies Your Hormones

Study suggests fructose could drive Alzheimer's disease

University of Colorado, February 13, 2023

An ancient human foraging instinct, fueled by fructose production in the brain, may hold clues to the development and possible treatment of Alzheimer's disease (AD), according to researchers at the University of Colorado Anschutz Medical Campus.

The study, published in The American Journal of Clinical Nutrition, offers a new way of looking at a fatal disease characterized by abnormal accumulations of proteins in the brain that slowly erode memory and cognition.

"We make the case that Alzheimer's disease is driven by diet," said the study's lead author Richard Johnson, MD, professor at the University of Colorado School of Medicine specializing in renal disease and hypertension. 

Johnson and his team suggest that AD is a harmful adaptation of an evolutionary survival pathway used in animals and our distant ancestors during times of scarcity.

"A basic tenet of life is to assure enough food, water and oxygen for survival," the study said. "Much attention has focused on the acute survival responses to hypoxia and starvation. However, nature has developed a clever way to protect animals before the crisis actually occurs."

When threatened with the possibility of starvation, early humans developed a survival response which sent them foraging for food. Yet foraging is only effective if metabolism is inhibited in various parts of the brain. Foraging requires focus, rapid assessment, impulsivity, exploratory behavior and risk taking. It is enhanced by blocking whatever gets in the way, like recent memories and attention to time. Fructose, a kind of sugar, helps damp down these centers, allowing more focus on food gathering.

In fact, the researchers found the entire foraging response was set in motion by the metabolism of fructose whether it was eaten or produced in the body. Metabolizing fructose and its byproduct, intracellular uric acid, was critical to the survival of both humans and animals.

The researchers noted that fructose reduces blood flow to the brain's cerebral cortex involved in self-control, as well as the hippocampus and thalamus. Meanwhile, blood flow increased around the visual cortex associated with food reward. All of this stimulated the foraging response.

Johnson suspects the survival response, what he calls the "survival switch," that helped ancient humans get through periods of scarcity, is now stuck in the "on" position in a time of relative abundance. This leads to the overeating of high fat, sugary and salty food prompting excess fructose production.

Fructose produced in the brain can lead to inflammation and ultimately Alzheimer's disease, the study said. Animals given fructose show memory lapses, a loss in the ability to navigate a maze and inflammation of the neurons.

Johnson suspects that the tendency of some AD patients to wander off might be a vestige of the ancient foraging response.

Meditation builds brain cells, Harvard study shows proof

Harvard University, February 4, 2023

Research has now demonstrated that meditation builds brain cells and increases gray matter in the brain. Using magnetic imaging (MRI), Harvard researchers found that meditation produced physiological changes in the brain's gray matter. Some areas in the brains of the study participants thickened after only eight weeks of mindfulness practice. The research was conducted at Massachusetts General Hospital by researchers from Harvard University. Research subjects spend eight weeks doing a mindfulness meditation program. For an average of 27 minutes a day, the study participants listened to audio recordings of guided meditation during the eight-week trial. The group met weekly as well. Magnetic resonance imaging scans (MRI) were taken of the participants' brains two weeks before the trial started and at the end of the eight-week program. A control group also had brain imaging (MRI) but did not listen to the audio-recorded meditation guides.

Study participants reported feeling less stressed after the eight-week period. MRI scans revealed decreased gray matter in the amygdalae and increased gray matter in the hippocampus. The amygdalae are the parts of the brain that help the body deal with anxiety and stress and controls the "fight or flight" mechanism. The hippocampus, which showed an increase in gray-matter density, is the area of the brain that controls memory, learning, self-awareness, introspection and compassion.

The study concluded that meditation builds brain cells. The shrinking of the amygdalae indicated a reduction in the body's stress response, which was expressed as the feelings of relaxation and stress reduction that were reported by the study participants. With the shrinking of the amygdalae, the pre-frontal cortex around them can then thicken. The pre-frontal cortex is the decision making part of the brain and is also in charge of concentration and awareness. It has been concluded that meditation builds brain cells, increases gray matter and allows the brain to slow responses to stress, providing better concentration, learning and memory.

Sunshine Vitamin Regenerates and Detoxifies Your Hormones

University of Vienna (Austria), February 1, 2023 

Sometimes called the 'sunshine vitamin' because it is found in high levels in citrus fruits, vitamin C has a uniquely regenerative role in hormone health and cancer prevention that has been overlooked for over twenty years

Truly groundbreaking research on the regenerative potential of vitamin C therapy for hormone health as well as cancer prevention was performed over twenty years ago, and yet still today it has received little to no attention.  

The molecular structure of progesterone, estrone (a form of estrogen) and testosterone is such that when exposed to differing biological and/or environmental conditions, e.g. UV light, pH, temperature, they lose electrons, becoming toxic and often carcinogenic metabolites that represent a burden on the body's eliminative capabilities. Vitamin C is a well-known electron donor, which is to say a substance that donates electrons to another compound (i.e. a 'reducing agent'). Vitamin C's ability to donate electrons can have an antioxidant effect as far as neutralizing free radicals, or as is the case with transient hormone metabolites, a structurally regenerative one.

"Investigations were performed using progesterone (PRG), testosterone (TES) and estrone (E1) as representatives of hormones. By irradiation with monochromatic UV light (λ=254 nm) in a media of 40% water and 60% ethanol, the degradation as well as the regeneration of the hormones was studied with each hormone individually and in the mixture with VitC as a function of the absorbed UV dose, using HPLC. Calculated from the obtained initial yields, the determined regeneration of PRG amounted to 52.7%, for TES to 58.6% and for E1 to 90.9%."

Remarkably, vitamin C was capable of almost complete regeneration of estrone and quite significant regeneration of both progesterone (52.7%) and testosterone (58.6%). 

Vitamin C may offer an alternative (or at least adjuvant and/or 'drug sparing' effect) to hormone replacement therapy, which suffers from the problem of 'feeding the deficiency,' i.e. negative feedback loops operative within our endocrine system can result in the down-regulation of endogenous steroid hormone production when exogenous forms are supplied. 

While a preliminary study, the researchers identified two possible implications of their research to human medicine:

•    Cancer Prevention/Treatment: "The regeneration of hormones by electron transfer process using a potent electron donor, such as VitC, might offer a new pathway for an efficient reduction in the formation of metabolites, also such initiating cancer among others."

•    Hormone Replacement Therapy: "The reported results concerning the ability of VitC to act as electron donor in the regeneration of hormone transients might also be of benefit in the clinical application of hormones (e.g. contraceptive, HRT)."

 About Gary Null

An internationally renowned expert in the field of health and nutrition, Gary Null, Ph.D is the author of over 70 best-selling books on healthy living and the director of over 100 critically acclaimed full-feature documentary films on natural health, self-empowerment and the environment. He is the host of ‘The Progressive Commentary Hour” and “The Gary Null Show”, the country’s longest running nationally syndicated health radio talk show which can be heard daily on here on the Progressive Radio Network.

Throughout his career, Gary Null has made hundreds of radio and television broadcasts throughout the country as an environmentalist, consumer advocate, investigative reporter and nutrition educator. More than 28 different Gary Null television specials have appeared on PBS stations throughout the nation, inspiring and motivating millions of viewers. He originated and completed more than one hundred major investigations on health issues resulting in the use of material by 20/20 and 60 Minutes. Dr. Null started this network to provide his followers with a media outlet for health and advocacy. For more of Dr. Null’s Work visit the Gary Null’s Work Section or Blog.GaryNull.com In addition to the Progressive Radio Network, Dr. Null has a full line of all-natural home and healthcare products that can be purchased at his Online Store.

Find articles, videos, back radio broadcasts, books, and more at GaryNull.com.

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