#but at the same time it’s dumb and a cop-out to throw in that much bait and that much of a genuinely charged tense friendship

[daisyachain]

Restorative or Transformative?: Homoerotic Subtext, The Closet, and Ciphers in Pop Culture. The nature of commercial art is that it’s sometimes bad and inconsistent. Notably it’s also misogynistic. One way in which audiences try to reconcile massive plot holes or gaps in character motivation is by reading secrets or hidden information into a plot.

Commonly, male characters are interpreted as closeted gay or bisexual to reconcile the absence of women from commercial narratives with the generally stunted and poorly-written male characters that form the focus on said texts. This reading has become especially common among a non-heterosexual milieu. Rather than transforming the original text into some radically different new form, this closeted interpretation seeks to make the original text stand on its own as a story rather than a Swiss cheese of dumb writing decisions.

This interpretation only works for a specific type of pop, usually genre fiction. Any story in which tortured male leads eschew women in favour of male-male bonds (because female characters are constantly killed off, written sparsely, or written out, because the production team keeps casting their male buddies, because actors demand to keep having scenes with their bros, whatever) can become a sounder structure if you put one of them in a closet.

The gay interpretation is the natural consequence of shoddy misogynistic writing from ventures like Supernatural, Naruto, all the biggest hits. It’s also the natural consequence of more benignly misogynistic writing like The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes or The Lord of the Rings, where women aren’t necessarily rejected but are simply absent from the worlds of the protagonists. When the emotional crux of the story falls on male-male interactions, this reads as romantic because society at large priorities (definitively heterosexual) romance as the pinnacle of human connection. Two forces are in conflict, the primacy of heterosexuality (read as: romance) and the primacy of men.

Anyway. All that is to say that the typical gay or bisexual reading of male characters in pop fiction comes from a very real place. But, in some places, that’s the default interpretation. Angst, insecurity, secrets, double lives, fatigue, disappointment, restrained passion, stunted personal growth, anyone living in the closet can tell you that it impacts and defines your whole life to know that you live in a way fundamentally incompatible with The Proper Way that life is structured around down to tax law and superstore prices (which assume a heterosexual nuclear family unit). Characters in fiction also tend to have personal problems because that makes them interesting and tasty.

If you’ve grown up on stories with the specific type of misogyny that can be papered over with a closeted interpretation of the male leads, carrying this interpretation over to any male character will make sense more often than not. Even a bit of angst or insecurity? Well of course that makes sense if a character is closeted.

Except that’s hurt a normal part of fiction, and sometimes the closeted interpretation takes away from the point of a character. If a male character is on another axis of marginalization, the closeted interpretation imposed by the slash reading community downplays or trivializes the effects of that marginalization in the plot by overwriting it with another type of marginalization. Alternately, sometimes a character’s heterosexuality is a part of the story. There are some sorts of critiques or investigations of misogyny or masculinity that don’t work if the character has an ‘opt out’ of the cisheteropatriarchal perspective. Not that gay/bisexual men aren’t except from misogyny, but misogyny masculinity and heterosexuality are so tightly linked that it sort of defeats the point if you interpret that character outside of heterosexuality.

All that is to say—the closet interpretation is a quick and easy spice to apply to the weaker parts of action-adventure genre fiction to make it taste better. It draws from a large enough sample of art that it’s pretty widely applicable. Because of that, it’s part of some people’s [my] default interpretation package just because the semi-dull macho show at least gets less dull if you imagine there’s a reason for there to be no girls besides simple hatred. That then forms its own problem where the interpretation that works with your average genre work gets then blanket-applied to all genre works and obscures the places where the closet interpretation doesn’t fix the work, and actually makes it less interesting.

[moonlit-imagines]

Headcanons for being Tony Stark’s child

Tony Stark x child!reader

warnings: alcohol ment,

a/n: so i just really think that the concept of tony having the party kid as opposed to nerdy avenger kid would be a really cool idea to explore teehee. most of this does actually take place pre-avengers tho!!

prompt:

you we’re quite the exhausting kid

“is this really how it felt to raise me?” -tony

many of nights he’d find your bed empty, you’d snuck out to go have your fun as teenagers do

“yeah, boss, i imagine it was” -happy

you always showed back up in one piece (like him) and besides a little slap on the wrist you didn’t get much discipline

actually, it usually went like:

“so, where did you go off to last night?” -tony

“a party” -you

“really? didn’t want to loop me in before you snuck out…again?”

“last time i told you about a party you showed up!”

“uh—yeah, but it’s not like i went all dad on you and dragged you away or anything”

“yeah, you joined the party and offered to buy teenagers more booze”

“hey, they all loved you after that! and they couldn’t get enough of my classic dance moves” -tony, jokingly doing the sprinkler with one arm “but seriously, let me know next time”

“we’ll see about that” -you

^the above conversion went about the same every time

sometimes for entertainment purposes you’d try a little harder, throw a few pillows under the covers to make it look like you were still home to put a smile on tony’s face

“aw, y/n reminds me so much of me” -tony

tony was still partying at this point so you’d flip the script on him from time to time

“you were out late” -you

“what are you, a cop? leave me alone. actually, can you get me some aspirin and water?” -tony

“sure, one or two” -you

“make it three” -tony

he would nurse your occasional hangovers (what a great dad!)

okay, he didn’t always know when you were gone. he was busy a lot of the time with his own business and extracurriculars so you guys did just kinda do your own thing for certain stretches of time

honestly you could be a bit of a klepto in the best of ways

but only to tony and only for fun

“oh, great, where’s my car?” -tony

“which one?” -pepper

“the black one!” -tony

“be more specific” -pepper

“the only one missing from my garage!” -tony

“yeah, i know, just wanted to give you some more time to think about it” -pepper

“i changed the code on the lockbox like, five times this week. did they hotwire it?” -tony

“we are talking about your kid, right? pretty sure they just hacked it” -pepper

“i am…so proud” -tony

you MAY have gotten a few close calls with authorities, but nothing tony couldn’t handle

and up until tony’s accident, the phrase “you’re going to give me a heart attack” was silly and endearing

“you might actually give me a heart attack, y/n, give a guy some warning or just say please for god’s sake” -tony, now comes with an arc reactor in his chest

“sorry” -you

“what—huh—didn’t hear ya, wanna say that a little louder?” -tony, very sarcastically

i tell ya when he got that armor u couldn’t tell if u were gonna flip out at him or invite him to a party

or steal it for…you didn’t even know what

but tony was 3 steps ahead of you when all this came to be

and you weren’t very interested in weapons, still just parties and dumb fun for you

“dad, i dont wanna be a nerd, will you just let me go out?” -you

“come on! just help me in the lab a few hours, what’s it gonna hurt?” -tony

“my social status” -you

“might i remind you you’re a stark? i think you’ll live if you miss one party” -tony

“you’d be surprised” -you

“hey, i almost died! give your old man a break” -tony

once tony got involved with SHIELD and the avengers he got even busier really

and in came the parenting advice from fury, clint, nat, steve

“hey, i don’t see you raising a teenager, back off” -tony

*clint side eye*

steve once tried to give you a good talking to, but you reminded him a great bit of your father with your stubbornness

“you done? i dont think you should be giving out any parenting tips fresh off the ice” -you

tony was kind of proud of you for sticking to your guns

especially around such powerful people

but you had a knack for that and could do it to practically anyone

mostly because you felt like an invincible teenager since you were raised by tony, who also thought himself an invincible teenager at one point

u tried to tone down giving tony grief when he started having panic attacks

since u accidentally caused a few by pushing boundaries and staying out for several nights in a row

cuz as tony gained more enemies, he thought you’d be in more danger

which was true

“happy, you’re y/n’s personal bodyguard” -tony

“no!” -you

“uh, cool? any fun parties planned tonight? i’ll be the designated driver. god knows i’ve been tony’s too many times” -happy

taglist: @alwaysananglophile // @locke-writes // @sweetheartlizzie07 // @queen-destenie // @johnmurphyisqueer // @captainshazamerica // @ravenmoore14 // @canarypoint // @procrastinatingsapphictrash // @swanimagines // @randomfandomimagine // @petersgroupie // @summersimmerus // @scarthefangirl // @bad4amficideas // @sheridans-dynamos // @simsrecs // @prettysbliss // @skdkdkckfk // @simp-legend // @wild-rose-35 // @nekoannie-chan // @evilcr0ne // @v0idl1nq // @ruvaakke // @thedarkqueenofavalon // @amirahiddleston // @beth-gallagher22 // @brutal-out-here // @rqmanoff // @elenavampire21 // @mymelodymia // @pheonixfire777 // @deanzboyfriend //

[writingroom21]

I Dare You

Pairing: Bestfriend!Rafe x fem!reader

Summary: A game of truth or dare shouldn't be an issue right? Definitely not when it's with you hot best friend. It's all fun and games right?

Warnings: 18+, smut, unprotected sex (wrap it up), p in v, cockwarming, cream pie, slight chocking and slapping, teasing, let me know if I miss any

Wc: 3.2K

Part 2

“Let’s play a game or something?” Rafe suggests next to you. You’ve been hanging out for the past few hours. It’s kinda a tradition at this point. Every week the two of you will hang out at either Tanny Hill or your house. The two of you would spend the time watching movies and binge eating pizza or whatever food you decide.

Tonight was the same thing. You had ordered pizza and wings before Rafe got to your house. Giving him the perfect timed entrance with the food since he ran into the delivery boy. That was at least four hours ago and the food is long gone. The movies you watched are just rolled credits. 

“I think I have Monopoly in the closet. We also have the switch that we can play on.” You rack your brain trying to think of what games that you have. “OOO! We can play just dance.” Rafe groans at the thought of the game. All throughout middle school you were obsessed.

Everyday you would go home from school, do your homework and play for hours. It was a great way of letting out energy while also giving you a workout. Your love for the game was then forced onto Rafe. You made him go home with you one day after school and play. Rafe has always been athletic, even as a child he loved sports. But that game took something out of him.

Every move was always red, never getting the motion correctly. Don’t get him started on the burn he would feel the day after. All the jumping around and the squating tore his muscles til they were strands. He hated that damn game but for some reason he would go back to your house the following day to do it over again. Now even thinking about the game hurts him.

“I would rather get back together with Christine then play that game.” He’s being over dramatic. The game isn’t even that bad. To say he would rather get back with the ex that stole from him, tried to sleep with his dad, and reported him to the cops is crazy. The stare you are giving him tells him you aren’t convinced. “Okay I wouldn’t but seriously I am not playing that death game.” Typical Rafe, drama queen. “Fine then what do you want to play? We can just put on another movie if you’re that bored.”

You took the bait without even thinking too much about it. “Why don’t we play truth or dare?” He suggests. His eyes are staring at the phone in his hands but he keeps an eye on you. Watching the perplexed look you give him. “Truth or dare? What are we twelve?” Teasing him will never get old. He just has a habit of saying the dumbest or weirdest things when he’s comfortable around people. Teasing him is a part of the friendship.

Rafe throws his phone on your bed as he moves around to look at you better. “Weren’t you watching that dumb kids tv show the other day? Gluey or something.” “Bluey.” You correct him. “That doesn’t matter. It’s good for your brain to help relax, you clearly need it.” Your foot nudges his thigh as you poke fun at him. He catches it and yanks you closer to him, your legs resting on his lap now.

You get a little more comfortable, fluffing the pillow behind you as you lay back. “It does matter. You watch something made for toddlers but you can’t play truth or dare. Come on indulge me.” He whines, his hand squeezing your calf. The feeling of his hands on you is not something new. You are one of the only people that he is comfortable enough to physically touch. The only thing is that sometimes the touch lingers, filling you with a fluttering feeling. 

Clearing your throat to distract from your emotions, you answer. “Fine. Truth or dare?”

“Dare.” You giggle as you think of something. “I dare you to try on one of my dresses.” His face drops and your giggles become full laughs. “Fuck you. I’m not doing that shit, think of something else.” His nails graze along your skin, reaching your knee then going down. “Nope, gotta follow the rules.” You know he would never put on a dress in his life. You also know that he has a hard time saying no to you. 

This is more of a test to see how far he would really go. “Too fucking bad. I’m not going to wear one of your dresses.” You pull your legs back to your body. Rafe tries to stop you from leaving but you had already turned away from him. “Baby come back.” There it is. That little moment he gives you butterflies. He’s been calling you that recently.

Baby

Like some freudian slip, a moment where he truly reveals how he feels. You ignore him as you open your closet grabbing a crop top instead. A dress was a long shot but you could pull this off. You walk back over to the bed, shirt in hand as you climb up. “What are you doing?” He’s watching as you crawl over to him. He can’t help but to have to adjust his pants. The action doesn’t go unnoticed.

“If you put the shirt on I’ll be happy. Then we can continue.” Rafe stares at the shirt then you. “Plus guys in crop tops are kinda hot.” You shrug your shoulders, looking down at the fabric and playing with it. Fanning innocence in your words to hide your true intentions. His eyes perk up hearing you say that. “You think guys look hot in that?”

His voice somehow got a little lower. You are itching to squeeze your thighs to sedate the ache you feel. But you won’t let him see that this is affecting you. It’s harder for him to hide and your eyes keep glancing down to get a peak. “Yeah. I like when you can see how tight the shirt is over their muscles.” Your eyes follow along his chest, imagine the shirt clinging to life on his chest. Your fingers are dying to touch him.

“Give me the damn shirt.” Rafe rips his shirt off, taking yours and puts it on. You mindlessly stare at him. You were right, the shirt is clinging to him. His muscles are stretching it out but his biceps are the main show. They are bulging out, the fabric barely holding together. He could choke you with his arms and you would be happy.

“Happy?” Your eyes flicker up to his. “Very.” Rafe shifts back to relax, his arm resting by your folded legs. His fingers extend out to brush against your exposed skin. “Truth or dare?” You think about it and take a long pause. “Truth.” His eyes squint at you, expressing his irritation that you took the easy way out. “Why did you and Evan break up?” 

He knows why you two broke up, it was him. Evan made it known he never liked rafe and your friendship with him. It definitely didn’t help when Rafe and him got into a fight. Rafe may have implied that you would leave him in an instant if he asked you to. That really set him off and escalated from there. The next day you told Rafe that you and Evan had broken up. He was relieved to know he had once again chased off another guy.

“We had a huge fight after the party. He accused me of sleeping with you and wouldn’t stop yelling. In the end he told me I had to choose, you or him. I chose you.” His hand sandwich between your calf and thigh. Tightening as his mind processes what you said. “Why?” “That’s not the game. My turn.” He tries to protest and you won’t let him. You can’t admit that a part of you does want him. Evan was right to be concerned, not that you would cheat but that you have feelings for Rafe.

“Dare.” You wish you had fought harder to not play this game. You suck at coming out with things to say. “Are you always going to say dare?” “Yes.” You huf a bit. “I dare you to take a thirst trap photo and send it to the group chat.” He groans, already picturing the texts he’s about to get. Reluctantly he gets up positioning himself in front of your full length mirror. He takes the picture and sends it to the chat.

Automatically Top and Kelce start blowing up the group chat. He ignores them and walks back over. “Truth or dare.” You don’t even think. “Dare.” He crawls on the bed like you did earlier, forcing you to lay back. His body is hovering above you, hand playing with the hair that frames your face. “I dare you to show me what you got earlier at Victoria Secret.” He saw the package when he got through the door. His curiosity was eating at him. Smirking, you run your hand around his chest, teasing where the shirt ends only to push him off you.

You grab the box that was sitting on your dresser and open it up. Slowly you take off your sleep shorts and shirt. Your fingers wrap around the thin piece of fabric you call underwear. Pulling them down inch by inch teasing him further by throwing them at him. You don’t know where your confidence came from. Before today you would never strip naked in front of Rafe, you just can’t help yourself.

You take out a red lace teddy, the lace only covers part of your sides and your breasts. It was held together by thin straps, leaving your front fully exposed. Rafe’s hand starts to palm himself over his sweatpants, the pain in his dick becoming unbearable. “Fuck you look good.” You giggle and give him a twirl shaking your ass in the process. “Yeah? You like it, pretty boy.”  Your hands are roaming your body, pausing to play with your breast.

Rafe can’t help but stare. “Come here.” You do without question, not wanting to let go of the game you ask him again. “Truth or dare.” Rafe reaches for your sides as soon as you get close. Playing with the lace between his fingers. “Can we both just stick to dare? It’s more fun that way.” Smiling you lean in, closing the gap slightly. “I dare you to take off your pants.” Like a good boy he does.

His boxer does nothing to hide the impressive dick he has. Your mouth water just thinking about it. Without really thinking your hand lands on his thigh, making its way up and retracting as soon as you get close to his dick. “Don’t be shy, baby. You can touch me.” Your eyes look at him through your eyelashes. He could probably cum just from watching you. Bingo

“I dare you to touch yourself.” A gasp leaves your lips at his dare. You know what he means, he wants you to pleasure yourself in front of him. But instead of listening you start to touch your thighs, then arms, and chest. “You know what I meant. Don’t you go start being a brat right now.” Giggling you move his thighs, slotting yourself in between them. Leaning back you expose yourself to him. The open crotch leaves you fully bare to him.

“Fuck.” He grunts as your fingers play with your clit, collecting the wetness by your entrance to help your movements. You almost get lost in the feeling, forgetting about the game, almost. “I dare you to take those boxers off and show me how you take care of yourself.” Rafe’s dick twitches when the cool air of your room hits him. His hand rapidly wrapping around himself and tugging. 

The two of you kinda stay there in a lull. Both of you watch the other as they play with themselves, waiting the other out till they crack. Rafe had envisioned this differently, he thought he would be the one having you begging for him. Now he doesn’t even know if he can go another minute without touching you. Without feeling you stretch out on him. He knows this is only going to torture himself more but he can’t help it. “I dare you to come sit on my lap.”

You may have been confident before but this is going further then you thought. Before you can psych yourself out you do it. Throwing your legs over his, your folds parting as you sit down on him, his dick laying perfectly on your pussy. His hands find your hips as your arms wrap his neck. Holding each other and staring into each other’s eyes. “Like this?” Your voice convey’s innocence, so do your eyes. Melting him even further into your spell. “Just like that baby.” 

His hands start to rock you back and forth, his dick sliding between your folds. The tip brushing against your clit. You let out a moan from the feeling, grinding harder to please him too. Your efforts were rewarded with a chocked moan leaving his perfect lips. Wanting to test how far he’s willing to go, your head leans forward. He's moving in trying to taste your lips, only stopping when he sees that you did. “I dare you to kiss me.” The words whispered on his lips.

Rafe brings a hand up to the back of your neck, dragging you in for a kiss. His lips devour yours as if you were his last meal. With the way that your soaking cunt is drenching him, it might actually be. He feels like he’s in heaven right now, he never wants this feeling to stop. But he knows it could be better. “I dare you to put it in.” Your hips stop, lips following along. There’s saliva connecting your lips as you detach yourself. You look apprehensive, not really sure if you want to ruin the friendship. “Do you really think that’s a good idea?”

Your fingers graze his scalp, missing when he had hair. The feeling of it weaving through your fingers can be felt lightly. “I miss your hair.” Rafe grins at you, pecking your lips. “I’ll grow it out again if you sit on my dick.” You clench around nothing, itching to feel him inside you. “Plus we’re best friends. We should be able to do everything together.” He brushes a piece of hair behind your ear, his hand resting on your check, thumb grazing your bottom lip. Blue eyes following the movement, flickering up to catch yours.

In your mind you know he’s trying to manipulate you with the best friend card. The truth is you don’t care, you would have pulled the same trick. Rafe isn’t the only one desperate to have him in me. “Okay. Promise this won’t change anything.” you lift your pinky up to him, he latches his to yours. “Promise, Just…just sit on it. That’s all you have to do.” He needs you now, he’ll say or do anything to get it. You lift yourself a little, getting a hold of him to line him up to your entrance.

Slowly you tease your hole with his tip. Slightly putting it in and then going up to then swirl his head around. Rafe is getting frustrated, groans of displeasure leaving his mouth. “Please.” He whines out, hands death gripping your hips. You lightly tap his cheek so he can open his eyes. With a smile you sink down, moaning at the feeling of his big dick stretching you. When you bottom out you lean your forehead on his. Hips flushed to one another.

Your eyes are locked in, watching as you both stew in the pleasure of feeling each other. Your walls are fluttering around him so nicely. He doesn’t know how much of this he could handle. Honestly he’s glad he suggested you cockwarm him. If he was fucking you right now he would have already finished. You are so tight and warm he wouldn’t have lasted a minute. Plus it gives you a chance to get used to him, he doesn’t plan on being gentle next him. His hands explore your back, nails raking down and slapping your ass. You let out a loud moan, your walls contract making him let one out as well. 

The minutes pass by as you two explore each other. Sharing kisses on lips or exposed skin, hands touching every inch they can reach. You can feel him throbbing inside you, pulsating every few seconds. Pulling away, your hands lay flat on his chest to keep him still. “I dare you to touch me.” Tilting your head you mock him. “Let’s see if you can make me cum.” A hand flies to your clit rubbing calculated circles, the other gripping your neck. “Dangerous game you’re playing there, baby.”

Rafe’s back to attacking your lips, moving his assault to your jaw nipping at the skin. His fingers move faster on your clit, hurdling you closer to your orgasim. “Tighter.” You plead, your own hand laying over his to get what you want. He tightens his hold, chuckling at your open mouth expression. “Fucking dirty girl. Here I thought you were my little angel, turns out you're a little devil.” Words don't seem to be forming in your brain.

Everything is blank, the only thing in your head is forcing you to focus on how good his fingers feel. How every twitch of his dick brushes your g-spot only adding to your pleasure. He can feel how close you are, your walls are strangling him. Ironic since it's the same thing he’s doing to you. The fuzziness of your mind snaps the band in your stomach, all the stimulation too much for you to handle. “Rafe please.” Your moans mix with his, they echo in your room bouncing off the walls. 

Rafe continues his motions to help you ride out your orgasim. His hands give up once you relax again. He’s on the verge of cumming, mustering up all his strength he holds back. You sense his hands on your hips ready to pull you up. You slap his hands away, cementing yourself to his lap. He gives you a panic look, knowing he won’t be able to hold off for long. “I dare you to cum in me. We should be able to do everything together right?” The moan he let out was pornographic at best. His body is shaking from how intense his orgasim is.

You moan as you watch him enjoying the view of his face and the feeling of him filling you up. He pulls you to his chest, keeping you close as he comes down. This is better than any drug he has ever taken. Slowly and carefully he moves you around, laying you on your back and pulling out. He stares at his dripping cum slides out of you. “God baby you’re amazing.” He kisses your stomach, chest, chin, then lips.

He holds you there, lips molding with yours. He gets up after a minute, getting a wet rag to clean you up. You lay in bed motionless when Rafe comes back after disposing of the dirty rag. “That was fucking amazing.” You say to your ceiling. Laughing, he lays down next to you. You look at him with a smile. “If you think that was good just wait till I actually fuck you.”

[breadandblankets]

how i hc duke's relationships with the other (main) bats

bruce: mentor/friend/weird HS teacher u bond with kinda thing, i think bruce on his end still feels simmering guilt for not being there for duke when he needed him, duke feel simmering resentment towards bruce for being another adult that left him, this will boil over at some point but then they'll get over it, they will never be that dumb nuclear found family thing, i think doug and elaine would like bruce tho so maybe one of those friend of the family situations where u call someone ur not related to aunt/uncle

cass: very very good friends, would probably consider her a sister from another mister if u will, i would hesitate to call her a best friend *gestures at all of war* but i think she's up there, i really love the headcanon that there is some tension on duke's end because cass has the ability to be more efficient but she actively chooses not to, i think for a long time duke is going to be holding some unhealthy and unrealistic standards both for himself and also people around him, like everything else this causes tension then erupts before it gets resolved, cass i think would know about said tension the whole time but have no idea how to bring up the issue or how to even think about resolving it so it drags on

dick: i think duke holds a grudge for the robin war thing, and i think he fucking should iykyk, (the way he just leaves duke on a roof??? with cops????, i was shouting at my fucking comic) idk i think dick would probably make light of it for a while but duke would be real fucking clear that he remembers and won't be forgiving and forgetting any time soon, i think they're acquaintances at best but realistically, coworkers

damian: like cass Extremely good friends, found family if you will, honestly i think they got a lot of their interpersonal issues out of the way before duke becomes signal, so really its a matter of time before they actually become friends and not just acquaintances, they're old man young to me, i think they do old man things like feed birds in the park and play Go together, i think damian is probably one of the only people duke doesn't hold to his standards, he thinks damian deserves to be a kid, making damian be a kid is probably some of the only time that duke is forced to relax by proxy, therefore duke and damian's friendship is strongly encouraged by bruce who is out of his depth for what to do with both of them and throwing them at each other seems to be working (👍 parenting)

tim: i honestly don't think they know each other well, like i think they may have talked once??? so i don't have shit to base their relationship off, generally i think they're amicable if distant, like a coworker you say hi to at the coffee machine

babs: i Need them to interact, honestly it would be really funny if duke meets babs for the first time as oracle and he's just like??? you're my favorite librarian? and babs is like !! we missed you when you stopped volunteering!!! and duke has to be like yeah that was the joker, i think they would have a good relationship, they don't work together all that much cause oracle doesn't run duke's ops and duke isn't usually on the night shift but they know they can call each other in if they need. one of duke's few trusted AdultsTM

jason: i think rocky at the start, duke would definitely have some Memories of the red hood, that would probably be a hill to overcome, but i generally think that jason will eventually move into a more positive position in the city even with the shadows of all that stuff following him ofc. they are absolute Assholes to each other in a way that is clearly affection, jason will let duke get away with anything up to and including murder, duke will never let jason get away with anything, its like a typo in the group chat

steph: re same as tim, and babs practically nothing to base the relationship on BUT i think they would get on like a house on fire, like cass: sister from another mister energy, steph is giving duke the "you just found out ur dad is a supervillain" support he needs, they are the only bats successfully going to college they probably go to events on campus together, idk they have so much potential as the forgotten robins and all that, i think they should bully bruce together that would be so fun.

[tainted-red]

Lingering - Patrick Hockstetter

Summary: Rumours that Patrick is stalking Y/n. Are they true?

TWS: Vouyerism, Masterbation, Stalking.

"Y/n" A short boy shouted at the older girl, Y/n froze in her tracks and turned to face the prepubescent boy. "I heard Hockstetter is stalking you! Be careful?" Eddie told the girl. She chuckled and responded with "Why is everyone so scared of him? I'll call the cops if it's ever concerning- plus I told you not to listen to rumours anymore Eddie" Y/n disclosed.

"I know-" Eddie tried to reason with Y/n. He wanted to warn her how dangerous Patrick could be. That one time he allegedly "took" Liah Carmen's dog for not letting him play under her skirt.

"Then let it go Eddie" Y/n cut off Eddie.

Eddie was about to speak again but his friend whom Y/n didn't like too much came around. "Hey, Bunny" Richie exclaimed, standing beside Eddie. Checking Y/n out.

"Hey Sweet-cheeks" Y/n teased.

Y/n and Eddie had no clue how they became close friends. Maybe it was because Eddie gave Y/n his sweater after Greta had slapped a jam sandwich on her shirt.

"Heard Cocksucker is stalking you... every night" Richie appealed,  Y/n groaned "Seriously? Have you heard that shit as well? How did that dumb rumour even start?" Y/n questioned.

"Well Linda told her mother she saw Patrick lurking around your house, So Linda's mother told your mom, your mom told the neighbours so maybe one of your neighbours has a big mouth" Eddie rambled, Playing with the hem of his shorts.

Y/n rolled her eyes "I don't think he even knows who I am. Anyways kids I got to go. See ya later" Y/n dismissed. Walking off, with an uncomfortable feeling lingering on her.

Were the rumours true or was just another one of Greta's friends being a shit-talker?

1

Y/n arrived home very late, Walking a couple of miles wasn't worth it. Just so she wouldn't get a couple of skepticalal looks.

She definitely felt a bit strange to hear people talking about Patrick like that. Creeping around her house. Apparently having a gun or something like that. It gave Y/n the chills. She thought she was an absolute nobody in this small town, now she plays a big role in a rumour.

Y/n decided a hot shower would relieve her from all this pressure and panic.

Stripping her clothes off her sticky and sweaty body that felt like it was overheating. Once she got her clothes all of she felt like she was freezing.

She grabbed a towel and placed it on her toilet. She then turned on the water for the shower.

2

Patrick was in-fact stalking Y/n, it was what he was doing right now.

Standing outside of her bedroom window. He was lucky she lived in a one-story house that wasn't very tall.

Every day she would take a shower, Walk into her room with only a towel on. Find an outfit then go back to the washroom to change. Patrick felt like it was the universe teasing him, waiting for him to make a move.

Y/n finished getting changed and walked into her room with only panties and a baggy shirt that covered most of her bottom.

Patrick felt his heart pound faster. The way the shirt would show off one of her soft-looking shoulders. She jumped into her bed, She never used the covers. but today she did.

Patrick could see her throw her underwear across the room, It was very dark in her room but Patrick could see her blanket faintly move around. Y/n gripped onto her sheets as she (Patrick assuming) played with herself.

Her mouth fell open. Patrick loved that. Her plump lips have moans and whimpers escape her mouth.

The blanket's movements now fastened. Patrick felt the blood go straight down to his dick. Unbuttoning his pants and pulling them down slightly, pulling his dick out of his pants.

Slowly pumping it, Seeing Y/n bite her bottom lip in pleasure. He stroked faster. He wanted them to climax at the same time. Although Y/n had a head start.

"Fuck Y/n" Patrick groaned, one hand on his shaft and the other attempting to pull his pants lower so it would be easier and quicker.

Y/n was clearly about to climax. One hand was now on her boob, squeezing it for more pleasure than she needed. Gosh Patrick wanted to be in both of her hands right now.

Patrick could picture Y/n underneath of him. Moaning and begging for more, His dick would fit perfectly.

Patrick saw Y/n's legs now shaking the blanket slightly, it was obvious she was about to finish. Patrick gripped onto his dick harder and stroked even faster than before.

The only time he ever felt this amount of excitement is when he was at his fridge in the middle of the woods. With a lifeless animal in his hand. Or when he "innocently" killed his little bother, Avery.

If Y/n could make him feel this excited could she really exist and not be a figment of his imagination?

Patrick felt his balls tighten, His legs and arms shiver and go numb as he came. Directly on Y/n's house, outside of her room.

If this wasn't a giveaway, Patrick didn't know what was.

He felt his crotch and spine tingle then go slightly numb. He loved whenever that happened just from a little bit of release.

Y/n was now sitting up, putting back on the underwear and wandering off to the washroom. She probably to go clean herself up

Patrick smirked. With all the rumours and gossip about Patrick stalking her, wouldn't she at least close the blinds? Yet she still left them wide open.

Even when she decided to have a fun time.

Patrick pulled up his pants and wiped his hand on his thigh. Buttoning his pants and smiling when he saw Y/n come back with a glass of water.

Sweat shimmered on her body. She looks beautiful.

Y/n sipped on the water and placed it on her bed stand. Getting back into bed with a smile. Patrick swore she looked directly at him, but maybe he was just wishing she did.

3

Patrick decided today he was going to ask Y/n out. He built up enough courage and confidence from seeing Y/n do something so secretive.

Patrick saw Y/n exit school and go to her younger friends. They seemed to be the only ones that didn't care that Patrick was stalking her. Patrick hated those fucking kids. But put on a nice act.

Approaching the group like a creep, "Hey Eddie. It's been a while, huh?" Patrick taunted, wrapping an arm around the squirming boy.

"Y-yeah" Was all Eddie let out. The biggest hypochondriac being touched by a guy who was speculated to have more diseases than hairs on his head.

Patrick let go of Eddie and turned his attention to Y/n "Hey Y/n. Heard the rumours." Patrick joked, letting out a deep chuckle.

Y/n blushed and started fidgeting with the hem of her skirt "Yeah, I- I have" Y/n stuttered. Patrick usually had that effect on people. intimidating them so much that the person he was talking to stuttered.

He adored it when Y/n did. Her voice was so soft and airy. She had the voice of a kitten, an angel didn't even speak but if it did it would sound like Y/n.

"Sucks. Hope that didn't scare you away" Patrick asked theoretically. Leaning down on his knees so he could be face-to-face with her.

"N-no of course not"  Y/n giggled. Patrick felt the blood rush down to his dick. He's gonna have to ask quickly or else someone will notice and ruin his chance.

"Good. I was wondering if you wanted to watch a movie or maybe go for a drive with me and my friends" Patrick wondered. Anticipating for a response.

Y/n's eyes opened wide, quickly looking away from Patrick's stare. She felt like she was about to explode in embarrassment for no reason.

"Yeah, sure. A ride sounds fun- not like that- I meant with your friends as well... Like in a car," Y/n stammered on her words, trying to save herself from her dirty-sounding remark.

It got worse each time she added more words to her sentence. Patrick chuckled at this, and so did Richie.

"Great. Sounds like a date? I'll pick you up tonight" Patrick preached, standing back up straight "Do you need my address or my phone number?" Y/n asked softly. Doe eyes batting at him.

He tugged on his bottom lip with his teeth "I think I can manage" Patrick said slyly with a light chuckle.

[alaskan-wallflower]

“Boys will be boys” headcannons, you say?

Well speaking as a teenage boy who’s done a few dumb things, here’s a couple:

-Soda definitely doesn’t wear a shirt in the summer. Any time it’s hot out, he’s ditched it (genuinely dunno how folks survive summer WITHOUT doing this tbh)

-Steve gets real pissy when he doesn’t win at things. Like if you beat him at poker he’ll tackle you. He sees this as re-establishing dominance. Everyone else sees it as Steve being a dumbass.

-Speaking of Steve, he seems like the sort to punch things when he’s mad. So does Dally. Just like…random walls and whatever. Throwing things too. I imagine it would scare Pony a bit at first, although by the time the book takes place, he’d be relatively unphased

-(movie!steve, ‘cuz in the movie he’s like 5’7) Steve used to be tall as a kid, like taller than Soda, Two-Bit, and Dally, and he’d make fun of them for being short. Then in like sophomore year of high school Soda and Dally get tall and Steve stays the same height. Soda is nice about it- but Dally mocks him for it non-stop

(Huh okay that’s a lot of Steve. I’ll shut up about him lol)

-Dally and Johnny once tried to make chocolate cake out of boredom. Somehow it turned into trying to light fireworks in the Curtis’s kitchen sink. Mrs. Curtis was pissed

-Sodapop and Darry tried to build a treehouse in the backyard as kids. It was just a piece of wood that they taped to a branch. Pony was still really impressed and bragged about it to his friends at school even though it was really lousy

-Two-Bit likes to say he’s won “every game of pool he’s ever played”, because he played once years ago and won due to a stroke of beginner’s luck. He refuses to play again now because he’ll “lose his perfect winning streak”

-Steve and Sodapop used to talk about hopping onto a freight train and going on adventures together “out in the Wild West”. Both of them low key still kinda want to

-Dally secretly wants to be a cowboy. Not like Buck, but like a Clint Eastwood type cowboy. Would die before saying so out loud

-Soda and Ponyboy have saved a few injured animals, like raccoons and whatever, and every time they do they try to convince Darry to let them keep it as a pet. Soda came real close once, and hid an injured lizard in his room for a month, but eventually Darry found it and forced him to free it

-Johnny was bored once and built a fort in the old lot, and him and Pony and Dally hung out in it until the cops made them take it down

-Sodapop, Two-Bit, and Steve once tried to start a band. It was terrible, because Soda and Two-Bit are too lazy to bother learning an instrument. Steve was okay because he could sing pretty well, but he sucked at the guitar he was trying to play too, and it all fell apart. Dally told them he’d pay them money to never play music again

okay, that’s probably enough for now- but yeah, there’s a few. Idk how much they stuck to the prompt, but whatever lol

all of these are biblically accurate, congrats 😭😭 especially johnny and sally making fireworks like that’s the only time mrs curtis yelled at any of the gang-dally is such a bitch in the last one tho like i know they were all like ten and he was twelve and he was just like “yeah never open your mouths again here’s ten bucks for each of ya buy yourself sonethin’ nice” like ok dally 😭😭soda and pong have straight up come home with a baby bobcat and darry was like “PUT THAT BACK ITS MOM IS LOOKING FOR IT 😡”

these are all canon trust

[bishopony]

Ohhh buddy I have THOUGHTS (This is so long, I'm so sorry)

1. I actually like Twilight better as a unicorn, she should never have became an Alicorn. (And that's coming from someone who first started watching around S5)

2. However, if Twilight becomes an Alicorn then all the Mane 6 should have been Alicorns. Rainbow, Fluttershy, Pinkie, Applejack, and Rarity did just as much as Twilight! Where are their wings/horns?

(That would have been awesome for the rest of the series!)

3. You are 100% right the tree castle is horrible. It's so barren and empty and so clearly made to sell toys. The library was nice and cozy and fit Twilight perfectly.

4. I absolutely hate redeemed Starlight Glimmer. Words cannot describe how much I despise this mare. You mean to tell me Twilight would throw a child into hell but let Starlight I-broke-space-time Glimmer go?? Absolutely not.

(Sunset Shimmer is a thousand times better and everything Starlight wishes she could be)

5. I actually like that Cozy Glow doesn’t have a backstory. Sometimes villains are just evil to be evil.

That being said, they should have at least tried to reform Cozy Glow. At the bare minimum put her somewhere other than (I can't stress this enough) PONY HELL!! She's like 12 Twilight holy shit-

6. Not enough people read the G4 comics. In fact, you should stop reading this ask and go read the comics instead. Most of them are online for free. I recommend The Return of Queen Chrysalis (1-4), Reflections (17-20), and Siege of the Crystal Empire (31-34).

7. MLP G5 isn't actually that bad, but it took too long to get off the ground. By the time it went from mediocre to good, most people didn't care. (Also Hasbro got greedy and G5 paid the price, but that's a rant for another day)

Also G5 should have been it's own thing, with no ties to G4.

8. Celestia and Luna should not have retired. Celestia I can understand, but Luna? Poor Luna just got back to Earth (or whatever the planet's called), no way is she retiring like 5 years in.

9. The CMC all having the same cutie mark was dumb. (And felt like a cop-out. Let my girls be unique!) Also the cutie mark designs themselves are just the ugliest things ever. Did no one teach that designer color theory??

10. King Sombra is best villain. However they should have picked literally anyone else to voice him in Season 9. Or even have the VA do a different voice! It's not even a bad voice, it's just not King Sombra's voice.

11. The Apples and the Pies are not related. Let me ship Marble Pie and Big Mac in peace. Let people ship Applejack and Pinkie Pie in peace.

12. Sugar Belle and Big Mac are a terrible couple. Maybe they were fine off-screen, but all we see is miscommunication. The only way that marriage is ending is in divorce.

13. I actually like that EQG used pony skin tones instead of human ones. That being said, there was way too much whitewashing—just use the pony's actual coat colors. I promise you can give Luna dark blue skin and it'll be fine. (How the fuck did Habro make the character with literally white skin even whiter?? HOW?? WHY???)

14. And finally (holds up megaphone): Just because Applejack and Rainbow Dash were seen together in the end, that doesn’t automatically mean they’re a couple!!!! —Sincerely, someone who thinks AJ and Rainbow are too similar to be a couple.

Ooooo ok cool I also have some thoughts LMAO. long post so read under the cut

I also like Twilight as a unicorn more than an alicorn but I do think it was right for her to become one since it was the climax of her character arc. The problem is that the show was meant to end after she became an alicorn and it went on for several more season :,) I think she was an alicorn for far too long

Not really sure I agree with this since it was only Twilight's destiny to become an alicorn. While it would've been cool to see them as alicorns and the whole mane 6 put forth equal effort to saving equestria, it just wasn't meant to be lol.

i saw someone's AU where the castle looked more like the student 6's tree of harmony and I like that a lot more, THAT'S how you design a crystal tree house ^^'

I like Starlight Glimmer and her unconventional approaches to problem solving, but man she did get off way easy for nearly destroying the world. I mean, idk, community service or something? Also why is Cozy Glow, a child, in pony hell? Why was she trapped in stone? How did the writers think that was an appropriate punishment but other characters like Starlight and Discord get redemptions? ToT

agreeing, no extra notes lol

I have a few of them! I've read the Nightmare Rarity and mirrorverse ones, I really love the comics

Agree with this one as well. G5's issues all come from Hasbro wanting to make even more money off of G4 and not allowing G5 to be its own thing like it should have. Hasbro, a toy company, should have made way more collectible G5 merch instead of the same cheap brushables of the same 4 characters over and over. I also saw someone on twitter make a good point that the G5 show should've aired on disney+ instead of netflix since that's what most families have nowadays. truly, G5 is just a victim of corporate greed

Yeah I always felt bad for Luna for that lol. If Celestia wants to retire good for her, but at least Luna should've have stuck around and helped Twilight. Can't image Ruler of Equestria is something you just get used to immediately, esp as one person instead of two like before

Totally agree, no extra notes

He's not my favorite villain, but he is fun, and they could've gotten a better VA for him lol. Or at least changed the direction for his voice? The VA is skilled and sounds good but the voice was a little too smooth IMO.

Yeah it was never actually confirmed so it's not canon. I wouldn't worry about shipping them cause the show writers clearly don't care lol

It's kind of forced imo. They're two random characters and I think they just wanted to use Sugar Belle again. I don't remember that episode well but ig discord was stopping them from seeing each other? idk they should've just gone straight to each other. just not anything I'm invested in

Agreed, they should've had their actual pony colors if they're not gonna have realistic skin. It was weird that rarity became pure white and luna was lightened so heavily. and why is celestia pink. if they were trying to avoid racially coding the characters they certainly failed that cause it just implies that they're all white

I think some of the writers said it was canon? Or at least implied since hasbro wouldn't let them confirm it outright. I don't like appledash either way, and can just pretend it isn't real lol.

[talesfrommedinastation]

My redneck neighbor Doug watches 'The Bad Batch': 'The Harbinger'

Yup, as we all know, Doug unlocked a HUGE character with Asajj Ventress, who is apparently an embittered ex-Navy wife lurking somewhere in the depths of the Florida Panhandle and not a reborn Jedi goth chick.

CW: You will learn more about this poor ex wife of John then you will ever deem fit. Be warned.

All images taken from here: https://www.cap-that.com/starwars/the-bad-batch/309

-----------------------------

Episode 9, “John’s-Ex-Wife: The Revenge”

Daddy Warcrimes does what a daddy in need of a mommy will do, and is going to pick up women by the dockside. Wonder if they take cash or not. 

And here’s Julio to remind him to wrap it before he snaps it, ya know? Good bro, when has Julio done anything wrong, love him. Maybe Julio laid his pipe in Space Louisiana last week, who knows if the mantis had a sister who had bills to pay and Terrebonne Parish don’t have a lot of jobs but has a lot of lonely people and, where were we? 

Why is it all foggy here now? We in Maine now? 

Well, Mutant Jimmers is doing work, as the kids say now, tracking down the junkies hiding out in the caves. I can’t blame Mutant Jimmers or the junkies, they gotta do their smack and doing it in the park ain’t good. I wonder who makes the meth on the island? It ain’t Church Lady, she’s too busy working and having fun in the snow with her beau, Sassy-Park-Ranger*.

Awwww shit it’s not space junkies, it’s worse! It’s JOHN’S-EX-WIFE! Of course she’s hiding her Ford pickup in a cave, the other one got booted outside of Pensacola after she banged the neighborhood granddad and he called the cops after she stole his TV. 

(the last shot John saw before he left for the rig that one time)

God damn, she’s wearing the same outfit you wear to work, Meat Muffin! Do you think she writes papers and yells at people on the phone like you do too?

Well John’s-Ex-Wife hasn’t changed, first thing she starts doing is fighting and bitching at everyone for not paying their bills on time. I hated that damn woman but I’ll say this much, she was organized. But that’s how the Devil is. Not organized to not cheat on John with every sailor in Pensacola and the neighborhood granddad but nobody’s perfect I guess. 

Well, she’s going to test Little Orphan Blondie by making her do yoga on the beach while her brothers watch. Doing dumb shit in public to be different, yup, that’s John’s-Ex-Wife for you. Surprised Daddy Warcrimes hasn’t capped her and her bleached hair yet. 

Oh! Now she sent Little Orphan Blondie on an errand leaving the boys behind in a dark room with her. How much do you wanna bet there’s gonna be a train and Thomas the Tank Engine ain’t involved? God, it was a miracle John never ended up with the clap. His ex wife really was the bike of Escambia County. 

And there’s a fight. Woo! John’s-Ex-Wife’s history as a bartender is coming on through! Girlfriend can handle her own–and here’s the lightsaber! WOAH! I don’t want her to kick my boy’s butts but damn girl, git ‘er done! 

Also why don’t they all just pile on her, why are they waiting, this ain’t ballroom dancing boys! Toaster Strudel and Rex would NEVER.  

Where IS TOASTER STRUDEL AND REX?!?!?!

Well, Little Orphan Blondie’s back and seems to like John’s-Ex-Wife for some reason. God damn it, Little Orphan Blondie, you’re a rube and I ain’t happy about it. At least Church Lady got you sushi and hit on your idiot brother who didn’t deserve her. 

Little Orphan Blondie’s no Jedi, whatever. But nothing brings the family together like deep sea fishing, even more then going off into the snow and punching each other in front of the trailer! 

Off John’s-Ex-Wife and Little Orphan Blondie go while the dads do a lil bit of peepin. Except Daddy Warcrimes who knows a thing or two and keeps a gun tailed her. Yeah, Daddy Warcrimes! 

Oh! What’s this? Ain’t this the shit from Aquaman? Are they gonna get jumped by sea aliens until Aquaman throws flashlights at them?** 

Nope! It’s that thing from Pirates of the Caribbean! Where’s Johnny Depp and his dreadlocks?! They’re firing up the HMS Search Warrant to do a rescue and…woah. Woah. What’s Johns-Ex-Wife doing here? The force? She can do all that shit but she can’t keep her marriage, oh Johns-Ex-Wife.  

Look at Daddy Warcrimes being a gentleman and helping the ladies onto their stolen work truck. Most ladies get upset when a creepy old man with a gun hoists them into a windowless van but not Johns-Ex-Wife. Trust me. 

Johns-Ex-Wife warns them and then flings off, as she is wont to do. Why do I feel the next episode is going to be the DEA raiding Space Florida? I bet she’s a snitch for the government, calling it now!

*=Doug will never get off the Phee/Mayday train. I tried. I failed. I’m sorry, internet. 

**=I THINK Doug means the Trench from the movie. The Trench Scene | Aquaman [4k, IMAX] - YouTube

For my Doug fans! @eyecandyeoz @cdblake1565 @sued134 @megmca @skellymom @yeehawgeek @amalthiaph and anyone else!

[wannaeatramyeon]

hi can I get hc for gun and maybe goo being older brothers (separately) like their 20 and reader is like 10-12<3

also by the way I love your writing and it's flow<333

!!!!!! Anon. This... this is. AHHHHHH!

Gun + Goo as YOUR older brothers hc!

Oh man oh man the potential for shenanigans.

Don't even think about dating. Can you imagine both of them discovering your first crush and showing up to their house? Like good cap and bad cop, except it's insane cop and insane in a slightly different way cop.

Goo, smile stretched thin over his face, peers down, nose inches from the boy's, "So this is the pipsqueak that has captured Y/N’s heart?"

Two eyes stare back, frozen in fear. "Huh?"

"Huh." Gun, positioned next to Goo, echoes. His body language is aloof, indiscrutable, but no less intimidating especially with his two pitch-black eyes boring into the kid's soul.

"So," Goo brings the attention back to him, "what can you offer? Money?"

"Power?" Gun chimes in.

"How rich are you?"

"How strong are you?"

"Are you some heir?"

"Are you a masterpiece?"

Cornered like a mouse, the boy squeaks out, "N-no..."

"Ugh." Goo closes his eyes and sighs, body going slack with disappointment. You really have questionable taste, but goddamn puppy love and first crushes. The heart wants what it wants. "Y/N must have picked up their bad taste from you." He throws Gun a glare at that, as if having two deranged oppas wouldn't make anyone have questionable taste.

"Shut up." Gun doesn't look at the blonde, eyes never moving from the object of your affection. A very normal, very pathetic looking boy. "Dinner tonight. So we can assess you." Gun pulls out a business card, holding it in front of the kid's face.

"B-but I have to study-"

"Tonight."

"O-ok..." With two shaking hands, he grasps the card and gulps.

How did they even get this confession out of you? Can you imagine telling a bare-faced lie to Gun and/or Goo?

If you ever make it to the first date (likely at an older age), then these two will be TAILING you. Hiding around every corner.

Goo will be watching everything through gritted teeth at their little baby growing up, and Gun will play it cool as usual but never takes his eyes from you.

Sweet sweet mercy on whoever breaks your heart. They might just accept it as a rite of passage, or Goo could be chasing them down the street with a baseball bat, egged on by Gun.

And if you're getting bullied? Oh boy. That other person does not want to LIVE.

"MORNING!" Goo kicks down the classroom door, flanked by Gun. They have a score to settle.

Gun zeroes in on the group of bullies at the back of the class. Gleefully spreading rumours about you and picking fights, were they? Well they're about to pay.

"You dumb motherfuckers," Gun deadpans at the group of shocked elementary kids, rolling up his sleeves.

"Yup, you dumb fucks!" Goo chirps, popping the p and reaching for his sword.

Gun glances over, "Pulled out your favourite weapon for this?"

"Nothing but the best for our little Y/N!"

At the same time neither of them places much importance on your education, but will also start a fistfight with your teacher for your poor grades. Which is totally not a result of your own shoddy studying habits.

Goes without saying, you will be spoilt to the ends of the EARTH. The best of the best for everything.

But as their lil sibling, you won't be let off easy for pretty much... Anything. These 2 are savage and you will develop a thick skin.

[halestrom]

17 on the kiss roulette for top gun

Love your writing ❤️❤️

so i wrote the hangster version of that here so instead have this:

jake/javy - #17 an upside down spiderman kiss

“How in the fuck did you manage this?” Javy demanded as he stopped in front of Jake who was, somehow, inexplicably hanging upside down, a look of resigned acceptance on his face. His foot was wrapped around a rope and Javy was never more glad that the small house they rented was a single story because he suddenly had visions of coming home to Jake with a broken neck.

“It’s Christmas,” Jake said as if that made any sense at all.

“In six months,” Javy said, arms crossed, figuring the red on Jake’s cheeks was from embarrassment, not too much blood to the head for the moment.

“Yeah, and we’re about to be deployed. By the time we get back it’ll be too late,” Jake said, arms crossing as he huffed, the motion sending him spinning. Javy reached out and stopped him before he was talking to the back of Jake’s head.

“Make this make sense,” Javy pleaded with the insanity he called his best-friend-turned-boyfriend.

“Christmas!” Jake repeated, throwing his arms to the side and making himself swing again.

Javy stopped him again as he looked over and finally spotted the pile of Christmas lights, sitting, half of them unopened and it was only then that he could see the few strings of lights already on the edge of the house. He stared at them for a moment, before he frowned at Jake. “What?”

“You like Christmas! The whole thing. You’re like a walking Santa’s Workshop as soon as Thanksgiving done,” Jake said.

“Yeah, I like Christmas. I like you more and would like it a whole lot if you didn’t break your neck,” Javy said.

“No, you love me,” Jake said with the same cheerful tone that had made at least one CO retire early. “You like Christmas.”

“I’d love you a whole lot more if you weren’t being a stupid ass,” Javy muttered, seeing the way Jake’s face was turning redder and he sighed, tugging out his phone, his heart slowing down for the first time since he had heard a crash outside  and had gone running.

“What are you doing?” Jake asked.

Javy stepped back and held up the camera, figuring it would be a great addition to his chat with Jake’s sisters lovingly titled dumb shit jake does and had been going strong for ten years. “Calling for help,” Javy said, stepping forward and wrapping an arm around Jake’s shoulders to pull him up before he passed up, bracing his boyfriends weight easily.

“Who are you calling?” Jake asked, suddenly wary.

“Rooster.”

“No.”

The response was immediate and expected. “Rooster’s the closest. It’s him or 911.”

“911,” Jake replied, immediately, just as Javy had expected.

“Well, tough shit,” Javy replied as he sent the message, reminding Bradley of the dirt he had on the man to get him over quickly. One day that wouldn’t work, and Javy would have to cop to not actually having any dirt on the man at all, but he was gullible and it worked in Javy’s favor.

“Jay,” Jake said, pouty and petulant in the way he only got when they were alone.

Javy hated that he thought it was cute. All their siblings despaired of Javy. “Look, babe. I’m not about to let you pass out so I need help getting you down.” He bent his head to kiss Jake before he could continue to complain. “And then we’ll both finish putting the lights up, alright?”

Jake sighed. “Fine. But only because I love you.”

“And I love you too.”

[raccoon-eyed-rebel]

Cinema

Masterlist

Series Masterlist

Pairing: barista!Mike (Hellraiser) x reader (you)

Summary: Mike takes you to see a terrible horror movie...

Word count: 2.1k

Warnings: Fluff. More fluff. Then some more fluff. Shenanigans. A makeout sesh... A cop. We're definitely still cockblocking Mikey. I'm still not apologizing for that...

If you like this fic, please let me know 🥰 and reblog so that others may see it too! <3

@deandoesthingstome @ellethespaceunicorn @sillyrabbit81 @peyton-warren @summersong69 @mayloma @livisss @geralts-yenn @ylva-syverson

Mike has taken you to what absolutely has to be the worst horror movie of all time. At least, that’s what the reviews said when you looked up the plot online beforehand. You don’t like horror, and this one is no different, yet you are here. All that proves, if you really think about it (which you don’t), is how much you really like Mike.

As you are waiting in line to get into the cinema, you can already tell that pretty much everyone – all forty or so people – is here for the same reason. Because the one thing these sucky horror movies are good for, is a good, old-fashioned, socially sanctioned make out sesh in the dark. You hate how perfect these dumb films are for it, and you especially hate that they genuinely scare you…

“I’ve never been here before,” you say as your eyes wander the foyer of the building. It’s a relatively new theater, but not so new that not having been here isn’t a scathing indictment of your nonexistent dating life.

“Really? I’ve been here a ton of times,” Mike says casually. It takes a few beats for him to realize what he’s said. “Eh… with friends…”

“Eh… on dates,” you correct him, and watch his ears go a little red from embarrassment.

“Well, they threw all these terrible scary movies at me the last year and a half… what was I supposed to do? Go see them alone?” he fake-complains.

“Oh, you went to see them, huh?” you tease. “What were they about, Mike?”

“Eh… People getting killed?” The girl in front of you just snorts outright, and one of the guys behind you does a half decent job at hiding his laughter in a suspicious cough. You follow the example of the girl.

“Mike, you idiot,” you blurt out. The look on his face is absolutely priceless; he looks mortified, and it somehow looks good on him. So good, even, that you grab the front of his jacket with both hands and pull him closer. When he looks at you, the expression of terror morphs into a smirk.

Finally, it’s time to find your seats. You follow Mike through the just a tad too dimly lit room. He somehow managed to get seats all the way in the back. They always sell out the quickest because… well… less people can watch you stick your tongue down your date’s throat there. Which is a nice thought, even though everyone who’s here is paired off and planning on doing approximately exactly the same – meaning no one will actually be watching you. Oh well. Mike also bought you popcorn, so he can stay, despite his outrageously obvious moves.

“This one,” Mike says as he sinks down on what should have been two seats, but isn’t.

“You know they have normal seats,” you say as you look around the room.

“Sweetcheeks, why are you making it sound like you don’t want to be near me?”

You sit down, putting as much distance between you and Mike as the small loveseat will allow. “I don’t know?” Because you don’t want him to think you’re easy? “This is a little transparent and… I have to use the bathroom. I’ll be right back.” What is wrong with you?

“Hey, are you here with Mike?” Oh god no… Some girl approaches you as you’re washing your hands, giving you a pitiful look when you nod. “Have you met his cats yet? Poor you.” She and another girl – looks like a friend of hers, you’re guessing they’re on a double date – laugh, and it almost sounds evil.

“Actually, I have,” you answer. “They’re adorable. And Mike is great.”

“They sleep in his bed. It’s weird,” the girl throws back at you, her voice absolutely dripping with contempt. You have to get out of here before you punch this bitch, but she stops you as you make a beeline for the door. “Hey! I’m just trying to help. He’s a weirdo.”

“He’s a vet,” you yell, “they tend to like animals. And it’s not weird. It’s sweet. Now get out of my way, I’m on a date.” You roll your eyes and push little miss spoilsport out of the way, leaving her there with a hideous grimace of disbelief on her pointy face. Okay, maybe she doesn’t look that bad, but you’ve had it with that cunt.

“Hey,” Mike says nervously when you come back to your seat.

“Hey,” you snap, still not over what just happened in the bathroom. When you look at Mike, there’s concern on his face.

“What’s wrong, Sweetcheeks?” he asks, his voice trembling ever so slightly.

“Have I ever told you you’re a great guy, and that I really like spending time with you?” you quietly blurt out as you sit down – close to him, this time. So close, in fact, that you’re almost in his lap.

“Eh, no you haven’t, thanks? Where is this coming from?” He looks a little flustered, clearly not expecting your compliment, or you sitting so close to him. You can’t blame him. Minutes ago, you were halfway through tearing him a new one for being a little obvious about wanting to make out with you.

“Some horrible troll-” You emphasize the word and speak up a little as aforementioned horrible troll passes by your seat – yes, you’re being petty, and yes, you’re going to keep being petty. “-attacked me in the bathroom calling you weird, and I need you to know that you’re not. And I really like being here with you, and I don’t actually care that you’re not being more subtle about this. I kind of like this. It’s cozy.”

“We don’t have to do anything, I just thought… you told me you get scared and I want to be able to hold you if you do,” he whispers, a little uneasy – and cleverly omitting the ‘easier to make out this way’ portion of his transparent plan, so you raise an eyebrow at him to coax the rest of the truth from him. “Baby, we’ve been cockblocked by cats, caught by my parents in their room and I was put on house arrest for three weeks… I just want you close. We can always just watch the movie.”

When he says that last bit, you laugh. “Then you really should have picked a better movie.”

You eat your popcorn during the commercials and the first five minutes of the movie. It’s plenty of time to determine the whole thing is absolute crap – and that the world probably could have done without yet another Hellraiser movie. In fact, you’re starting to regret not spending these five minutes making out with Mike. Luckily, with the way Mike kisses, he makes up for those five minutes within seconds.

Another lucky thing would be the fact that Mike still clearly realizes that you are, in fact, in a public place, which means he isn’t as handsy as he was last time… The last thing you need is to get caught somewhere on your way to half naked in a movie theater, that would be… bad. Let’s leave it at that. Now, that doesn’t mean Mike isn’t all over you in any way he can get away with – of course he is, and you want him to, but man, it makes you wish you were at his place right now, and his cats would leave you the fuck alone, and the turtles wouldn’t be slurping up all attention, and his parents wouldn’t walk in on you.

You stay snuggled up to Mike for the duration of the movie, and even though the few snippets you’ve seen are so horrible you can’t even describe it, you’re sad when it’s over. Hand in hand, you leave the cinema, walking towards his car just about as slowly as you can manage.

“I don’t want this date to end,” you confess as you finally get to the car. His parents are home tonight, he already mentioned that, and so is your roommate. Mike says nothing, and with slightly heated cheeks you get into the car.

“Doesn’t have to be over,” he mumbles when he’s also seated and the doors are closed. You look at him, shock apparent on your face, and shake your head by means of a question. Mike makes a vague gesture around him. Does he mean…? He can’t be serious!

“In your car?” you blurt out in disbelief. Absolutely the fuck not!

“God, you’re hot.” So, you caved. Who cares? You’re young, and you’re finally alone, and it’s Mike’s hands sliding up your sides, underneath your blouse and his hands feel good, and there’s no cats to sit on anyone’s head, or… You’re not even overly worried about a serial killer showing up – which is a very normal fear for you after having watched a horror movie, but your little movie date with Mike involved so little actual watching that you’re not scared now.

“Babe?” Mike takes a short break from feeling you up to check if you’re okay, although he never actually takes his lips off your neck. Is ‘pulling on the hem of his shirt until he finally takes it off’ and answer to his question? Apparently. Your hands tangle in his hair, pulling him into another kiss. You used to think his enthusiasm was a little bit childish, but you have to admit; these weeks have taken their toll on you, too. At this point, you’re almost just as bad as he is, clawing at his back, impatiently dragging his mouth back to yours.

He's surprisingly strong, and not-so-surprisingly good at maneuvering you around in the backseat of this car. Ten bucks says it’s not the first – or second, or third – time he’s done this… Mike pulls you into lap, and the sigh that you let out as you straddle his thighs morphs into a chuckle.

“You’re happy,” you tease as soon as you feel his erection rub against you.

“Cats, parents, grounded,” he mumbles while kissing down your neck, towards your chest. With a few swift moves, he opens enough of your blouse to be able to reach your boobs.

“How on earth did you… That was fast!” you exclaim, staring at your now mostly naked chest in disbelief.

“I stick needles in squirming hamsters on occasion. Can’t do that without at least a little dexterity,” Mike deadpans. If there’s a good response to that out there, you sure as hell don’t know what it is.

You bite your lip and hold down a chuckle when Mike’s hands find their way into the back pockets of your jeans, squeezing your ass through the fabric and pulling you closer against him. When you roll your hips, he moans – the sound is music to your ears. There’s something about teasing this guy that’s… fun and easy but at the same time insanely satisfying. The way he squirms underneath you, the way he gets impatient and sloppy – well, sloppier… You’ve never felt like someone wanted you this much – and not just because he wants to see your tits, perhaps?

Somehow, Mike manages to get you onto your back in the backseat. It’s a less practical position, but it works – kinda – and that’s good enough for you. For all your talk about Mike being eager and impatient, this whole waiting thing is definitely also starting to take its toll on you.

Soon, it’s your hands in his back pockets – as soon as you’re done mapping every muscle in his back, that is. He grinds his hips into you. You’re wet, you’re ready; you need him. Slowly, one of your hands moves to the front of his jeans, struggles with the button for a moment, then…

Three raps on the window, Mike pulling away from you, buttoning his jeans, while you hastily try to button your blouse again. Before you can make yourself completely decent, another knock, and Mike rolling down the window.

“Officer,” he sighs, “good evening.”

“Michael.” The cop knows him by name? That’s not a good thing… Especially considering the fact that Mike turns around to you with a horrified look on his face.

“I swear he only knows my name because mom and I take care of the dogs!” Sounds plausible.

“Go home, kids,” the officer warns you both before walking away.

Mike kisses you again before reaching down to pick his shirt up off the floor.

“Sorry,” he says softly. “I know it was a horrible idea, I just…”

“You want to have sex with me,” you reply. He seems taken aback by your directness, but after a short while, he shakes his head, much to your surprise.

“I mean…” He sighs deeply. “Please don’t think that’s all there is to it. I really like you.”

“You’re just a little impatient,” you tease. He rolls his eyes before crawling back into the front seat, then he helps you get back in the passenger seat.

“C’mon, I’ll drive you home.”

[invisiblegarters]

Only Friends Character Rankings - Ep 8

Decided to start titling these with the episode but dear god now I have to go back and fix them and apparently I am not consistent with my tagging (shocker), so probably that won't happen. We'll just move forward.

Last week Sand pissed me off, Ray managed to get what he wanted while still kinda looking like a loser (and making Boston either a prophet or just someone who knows Ray way too fucking well), and Mew won the ep by being impressively unhinged in his revenge and making the supremely dumb (and messy) choice to date Ray. I enjoyed the visuals but also couldn't stop laughing because you know Book was bending his knees so he could do the forehead touching and neck nuzzling with Khaotung. It must have looked so awkward.

ANYwho, let's get to it, shall we?

Disclaimer because I'm gonna need it this time: these are my opinions only and do not necessarily reflect what the show is trying to do or the characters' actual motivations. While I try to take a step back as much as possible while doing these my biases and personal experiences are still going to come into play and today I'm more frustrated than usual.

You've been warned.

Characters (Fave to Least Fave atm)

Sand. Look, I was terrified about what he would be doing this episode last week. I worked myself into a whole lather about it. But he was awesome here. He set clear boundaries and stuck to them, he rebuffed Ray at every turn. He tried to move on with his Freddie Mercury soul twin. Or at least hook up which I would love for him, everyone else gets to at least kiss someone else why hasn't Sand, huh? WHY HAVEN'T YOU LET SAND KISS ANYONE BUT RAY, SHOW THIS IS WORKING MY NERVES PLEASE TAKE HIM OUT OF COLD STORAGE. *ahem*. Frankly he exceeded my expectations.

So I want to know what all the people dragging him for not doing enough fucking want. Do you want him to hit Ray over the head with his guitar (me too but we all know he hasn't been pushed that far yet)? Leave the country? Change schools? What?

He's trying. This whole episode was him trying to let Ray and whatever hopes he may have harbored about him go with as much dignity as he could - yes he was softer about it than I would have been, but Sand's just like that. He is taking responsibility for his own damn feelings the way he always does and he's trying to deal with them alone, away from Ray, without causing fuss. Ray's the one hounding the shit out of him right now. If it's about him running to help him with the cops, well, I sort of get it but not really - Sand would have done that for anyone he cares about, and he knows damn good and well if Ray's caught with coke after he just got into trouble for drinking and driving his dad might not even be able to get him out of it. He'd have done the same for Nick guys (not that he'd have to but my point stands). You can't just turn caring off because the person you care about sucks. And he could have stayed and babied him and he chose to leave and baby Nick instead, and to me that feels important.

Although it might be about the preview, which okay, fair. And if it is I can't throw stones because the preview for this ep had me incandescent with rage last week.

Beyond all that, though, I just want to know: has anyone ever taken care of this man? Because it feels like no. Every relationship in his life, form his mom to Ray to Nick, even to Yo in this ep, he winds up playing caretaker. The shoulder. The one people rely on. It bothers me that he seems to have no one to lean on in turn, and I doubt he's gonna get that at all in the run of this show.

Boston. I love Boston I will never stop. He didn't do a lot today but everything he did do was great. Pining over NIck but still shutting him down, genuinely listening to Atom, showing up to a party with all the friends who hate him right now and being like "yeah, my place too, suck it." Hands down my favorite conversation this ep was between him and Top - something about it felt so oddly playful. Well, you know, for Boston. It felt like whatever hang up he had with Top, it's gone now, which makes me think once again that it was less about him than Mew. Also he did this:

and it made me cackle.

He's gonna fuck Atom and piss Cheum off but Atom's a big boy so I'm not really that bothered by it. That said, it was funny to watch him hesitate for once. Like hm, this could go badly. And then Atom was like "so?" and that was that, lol. Oh, Boston.

Mew. Oh, Mew. I was so disappointed when I saw him doing lines with Ray. This is not the way I wanted you to spiral, babe. But I did call it. He wanted Ray to make him forget how he feels about Top, but Ray can't do that because Mew is about as into him as he is the wall. In fact he might be more into the wall, if possible. It was certainly a trip watching his face every time Ray got affectionate. And when Ray isn't working, what does he turn to next? Alcohol. Drugs. Anything to help him pretend he's moving on. "Habits (Stay High)" is Mew's song this episode.

But in the end it won't last, I firmly believe that. Mew will boomerang back to himself, maybe not as gullible as he calls it, maybe a little less uptight, but yeah. He's not going to keep wearing Ray's persona like his own little Halloween costume. He's got too good a foundation for that, has been too firmly rooted by the love of his parents and even his friends (yes, his friends, they might not be good for each other but all of them try to be good to him save perhaps Boston I said what I said).

Although we still have four eps so I doubt it'll happen soon.

Top. I just don't get the need to hate on this guy. It's getting super old. I think he's really trying - he clearly cares about Mew, and he's cared for a while, and he wants him to be happy even if it's not with him. Weird to me how when Ray said the same everyone bought into it, but when Top does it it's sus. Especially when Ray demonstrably couldn't even keep to that claim, lol.

But I digress. Maybe I'll have egg on my face in two episodes or whatever, but I feel for him. And I believe that he actually cares about Mew. You don't just stand there and take all the things that Top took from Mew this ep and then turn around and take care of someone when they're drunk and high and their new boyfriend is nowhere to be found to do the thing they promised they'd do better than anyone else. Maybe he'll do something beyond the pale in the next ep and that will be that, but right now he's putting his money where his mouth is in regards to Mew and I have to commend him for that. I am curious if he will continue doing so if Mew tells him to leave him be and means it - has he done that? Because as far as I can recall he has not, which is telling.

He was stand up this ep, but he does lose a few points for cuddling Mew while he was incapacitated. Because Mew would definitely not want that were he awake and sober (or well he would but he would still say no and that's the point).

Popular theory is that he called the cops. If he did, I basically say *shrug*

The Lesbians. Yes they are an entity leave me be. I am not one who thinks that Cheum was entirely wrong, although I do think that there's a time and place and maybe while someone is being pinned down by the cops isn't it. She is wrong that Ray is dragging Mew down with him. Ray isn't doing that, Mew is happily sliding all on his own. Well, not so happily but the choice is still his. Ray is enabling it, yes, but of course he is. One, it's Mew. Ray has no idea how to tell Mew no. Two, Ray does all these things himself. Of course he's gonna be okay with Mew doing them too, because not only does it reinforce his own shitty habits, it give him one less person telling him they're shitty. I agree with fandom that Cheum is not Ray's friend, not really. But Ray isn't hers either. Both of them care about Mew. The end.

April though was the real MVP of the two of them. Woman speaks sense, both about Mew and about the situation with Ray. I think probably because the only person she really cares about here is Cheum, so it's easier for her to step back and see the others from a more neutral place.

Nick. Still out here trying to earn the gold in the simp category of the messy Olympics. The brass balls he had to go up to Boston like he did, though. Like. Okay. I still think you're insane but I can respect that. HIs hurt face when Boston shut him down didn't get to me this ep, but his Halloween costume was cute.

Daddy Dan is gonna be a problem. I can't wait. Every time that man smiles I'm like danger, will robinson, and yet I'm so ready for Nick to walk right into that thinking that he's moving on and finding that he stepped into something he can't handle.

Ray. This happy motherfucker.

Where do I even start with this one. He has Mew just like he always wanted and he can't even give it fifteen minutes before he's bugging Sand. Like dude. Come on. Give the poor guy a break please. But of course Ray won't - all he's thinking is that he can have Mew for boyfriend and Sand to make him feel better about himself. It's...frustrating to watch.

But also he was so pathetic everywhere this ep that I don't think I've ever liked him more. He's such a loser, I'm sorry but not really. Like it cracks me up that Sand gets shit on for wanting him and Nick gets shit on for wanting Boston but I'm supposed to feel bad for this dude? Nah. At least Sand and Nick haven't stopped quite so low as to be the willing rebound for a dude that clearly doesn't want them yet (I mean, Nick so would. Sand...not so much. More on this later).

Relationships (Fave to Least Fave atm)

TopMew. I actually think these two might be able to make it work. They're the only couple I think this about now.

They love each other guys. Sorry but it's true. Maybe Mew won't be able to get over the Boston of it all, and if he can't he can't. But he wouldn't be spiraling this hard if he didn't still love Top - he certainly wouldn't have looked at him the way he did in the hostel kitchen with his defenses down, high and miserable and sick and hurting so badly and still in love despite his best efforts. And he wouldn't need to hurt him so damn badly, either. And Top loves him back.

Now all the masks are off. Whether or not they work together that way remains to be seen.

YoPlug. Look you leave Yo alone Jojo I am not kidding. I know you were being all clever and showing Sand his closed off future (which again, wouldn't be happening if people didn't hurt him, Ray), but I'm not having her crying on my screen. You stop that.

That said, as short as it was the breakdown of the relationship felt too real. Sometimes loneliness becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy, but what are you supposed to do when every time you put your heart out it comes back a little less whole?

Nick and Sand. Can they please make out. So far Sand is the only one of these six dudes who hasn't so much as kissed anyone other than his OG pair (I'm counting the preview to slide Nick in here, sue me), and I for one am sick of it. You better pay me back for this insult with Sand getting his mouth (and hands) all over everyone soon. Starting with this guy.

Even if they don't kiss on the mouth (RUDE), I do love how they support each other. Sand led Nick out of that hostel like "yes you are crazy friend but we're all a little crazy in love, lean on me and I'll get you home." And I love that for them.

BostonNick. Boston catching feelings? Who would have thought (me, forever ago, lol. I said Nick might sneak in under the radar because Boston was so sure he couldn't possibly, and it looks like I might have been right). The fact that he knows that Nick was the one who told Mew about the sex tape because Nick was the only one he told. Good times. The way he shuts Nick down in spite of the fact that he clearly misses him. Also good times. I genuinely can't wait to see what they do next.

RayMew & RaySand. Putting them together because they're like pb&j for this show. Can't have one without the other rearing it's ugly head. Yes, I said that right.

Ray and Mew were exactly the dumpster fire most of us expected (I'd say all of us but I know there were some people out there who were hoping they wouldn't be - I see you and I appreciate you). Mew is wild out here not even being able to hide how little he enjoys Ray's boyfriendly attentions, and even I had to wince when Ray was waiting for him to say "I love you" back and he just kind a looked at him like "That's...nice." Dude couldn't even kiss him unless he was performing for Top (and okay look, in context the kiss was not great. Out of context? Book and Khao BL when please?).

People seem to think he and Mew are going to be over at some point next ep, but I'm not entirely sure (although after watching the preview again I do think it's more likely than I thought at first, seeing as Mew is flirting with some dude and I don't think he'd do that if he and Ray were still pretending they might actually be able to manage a relationship when only one of them wants one - I could be wrong but I don't think so, even though he does not care for Ray like that I think Mew would be uber sensitive about it considering). That said, if it's Mew who ends it it's gonna feel like we're just doing yet another lap of the same damn track and I wish they'd change the record already. What is it Sand said? Moving on in a circle? Yeah.

Khaotung did say that Ray is selfish and won't stop until he gets what he wants, and I guess we're seeing it this ep. I was so annoyed with him getting up in Sand's space all the time, like dude. You have a whole ass boyfriend (as Sand kept helpfully reminding him). STOP. But he won't stop. Because why should he, right. If he pokes enough Sand'll just give in and then he can have his cake and eat it.

Everything Ray did and said to Sand at that party was awful (although I did get a kick out of him literally running up to pull Sand and the other Freddie apart like the pitter patter of his shoes on the floor combined with just watching him bolt that few feet to prevent lips from touching KILLED me I had to pause the video to cackle with sheer delight this absolute fuckass of a man (surprisingly affectionate)).

He really needs to quit kissing people that don't want him to, please. Like, yesterday. Damn, Ray. Also say what you like, defend it how you want, but trust me Mew would not be happy with any of what he was pulling at the party. Mew IS DATING HIM because Top did something very like, and Ray's big draw was that he would never. And here he is proving Mew spectacularly wrong.

He doesn't want a threesome and he doesn't want polyamory. He wants to play at being Hugh Heffner.

And while I wouldn't buy it of Mew, I totally believe Ray would tell Sand that he and Mew were done to get him back where he wants him. Sand said I won't be your second choice and Ray heard but he didn't listen, he never listens, and I feel like if he's not careful he's gonna push that man into doing something incredibly destructive in the next four episodes. I actually want to be wrong here - I'd like it more if the huge trailer fight wasn't about Mew at all - but the show seems to really want to make glue out of the RayMewSand love triangle horse so I guess we'll have to wait and see.

If I had my druthers since I guess we're doing round three of this, it wouldn't be Ray lying or going back to old reliable when Mew finally admits that he's just not that into him, but a genuine attempt to try to be together with admitted feelings on both sides. And then it would be Sand who does something to fuck it up. If I have to go through this yet again I want Ray to be all in and shattered for once. But let's be real here, this show never gives me what I want (Am I still bitter Top and Sand weren't exes? You bet your ass. I still think Top and Sand should hatefuck or there should be a flashback to a threesome with them and the ex okay it's just what should happen show why do you hate fun) so I'm not holding my breath.

In Conclusion

Things went both better and worse than I expected. Everyone here is a mess and I still have hope for that baseball bat.

Please for the love of all that is good in the world let Sand fuck.

[swiftfootedachilles]

Mickey would find a way back to Ian in the psych ward, it would be similar to how he got into prison (ratted on the cartel and chose where he goes) but he'd do some asking around on what gets you into the psych ward and he'd work out what "symptoms" he has and he'd stick with playing them all the time

But the writers would do something shitty like playing up his autism traits then calling him "crazy" for acting like that and that's how he got in

yeahhh the shamey writers have a real knack for making mickey as stereotypically autistic as possible for comedy. i on the other hand am sophisticated in my autismification

but ok ok listen. so seeing as he rolled on the cartel and obviously got a lot in return for his testimony, i definitely think he couldve finagled his way into a secure psych hospital. i mean they obviously shortened or possibly even commuted his sentence in canon, since he was sentenced to 15 (incredibly short for what i assume is attempted murder??), expected to serve 8, but got out in less than 4 after escaping which shouldve added to his sentence. so if he knew ian was getting sentenced to a hospital he couldve done a few things and im gonna lay them out bc each one comes with its own intricacies that writers can expound upon

kept his sentence the same as canon, but he convinces the cops to put him in a psych hospital with ian as part of his deal. otherwise he refuses to talk

commute his sentence on the grounds of insanity, meaning hed talk to a forensic psychologist and talk about his childhood and shit, proving that he was so psychologically damaged as a kid that he somehow ended up having some episode and hurting sammi while legally insane. this could be a great way to really understand mickeys situation growing up. plus i really just want mickey to have his time in the limelight and put on his hurt puppydog face and act/lie his way out of responsibility. perhaps he realizes at some point that hes no longer acting and is truly expressing the raw emotions hes has bottled up since he was a kid 🤔🥺 also of course the new sentence he receives happens to be the same length as ians 🤭

gets his trial thrown out (BECAUSE HE SHOULDNT HAVE GOTTEN CONVICTED IN THE FIRST PLACE THAT WAS BULLSHIT) and gets a retrial, staying in the psych hospital in the meantime for similar reasons as mentioned above. fuck it lets bring back sammi and her kid and get all the gallaghers interviewed by police/giving testimonies in court including fiona!!! and because theyre not fucking dumb this time theyll actually get mickeys ass found NOT GUILTY this time and he can live his mfing life without an adult record. no larry/paula shit, no plothole on how mickey and ian could live together despite both being felons on parole, the dynamic between ian and mickey being flipped on its head now that mickeys got a clean record and ians the convict, omg what if they had their moment of one of them visiting the other in jail and putting their hand on the glass but this time its mickey visiting ian 🥺🥺🥺🥺 im literally bout to throw up

im very much a choose your own adventure kinda headcanoner... no matter how he gets there, mickey fucking GETS THERE. and i just have so many thoughts on how theyd interact with each other as roommates in a psych hospital. ian showing mickey the ropes for the psych side of things and mickey guiding ian thru the criminal/prison-y side 🥺 also i absolutely think mickey would get diagnosed with c-ptsd and autism while in the hospital and ofc at first he denies it, then he goes thru this phase of thinking hes "broken," then ian and his therapists (and an unexpected ragtag group of criminally insane individuals) become a solid story system to learn to accept himself. ian especially. obviously. he makes a list of things to buy mickey once they get out and save the money. because dammit if his lover doesnt have the best sensory corner in all of chicago! and overall they just get to actually... grow as people and as a couple by supporting each other in ways that canon never gave us

[rottedbrainz]

Haha one step closer to posting the first chapter of the Tibblings Fic, there are just a couple of characters that needed to be introduced before hand! So let's get started!

Going from left to right btw

Starting off with Valerie!

She's Giovanni's daughter and is going through her "moody Teenager phase". She's angry at the way her life is going after her parents get a divorce and Vanni begins to date Lib. It only gets more akward for her whenever she finds out that Lib is her art teacher. She doesnt want to get in the way of Giovanni's and Libs relationship, and lies to her Dad whenever he ask her if she likes him dating Kib. Whenever she distance herself from Giovanni and Lib she can be quite friendly. She's in charge of year book photos for her school and news paper.

She's a sweet girl with a big personality, but she can become a nervous wreck. Especially around David, who she has a tiny crush on and admires a lot.

Giovanni is Valerie's Dad, Libs boyfriend, and Tibbs very best friend. He's divorced from his horrible ex wife and is in a very healthy and loving relationship with Tibbs sister, Lib. He's trying his best to navigate Valerie's moodiness post divorce. He loves Valerie and let's her know that she comes first before any woman, but he also needs her to try and get along with Lib.

His friendship with Tibbs is one that he cherishes to the fullest. Heck, if he never met Tibbs he would probably be a catholic pastor like his mother wanted him to be. As teenagers Vanni followed Tibbs to whatever rebellious scheme Tibbs had in mind. Drinking Beers Tibbs took from the gestation he worked at? Why not. Smoking MJ in the bed of a truck? Sure, sounds fun! Helping Tibbs run from the cops because of God's know what? Absolutely! What are friends for!

Gracie was also in a friend group with Vanni and Tibbs as teens. After moving all the way from Oklahoma to Hawaii she instantly took a liking to the two boys and they all went and caused chaos together.

She mellowed out a lot after Tibbs left and sparked a romance with Tibbs brother Budd and eventually married him. She finds all aspects of their marriage to be fine except for whenever it comes with her struggle with intimacy. See Gracie is Ace, but in the time period the fic takes place in Gracie doesn't understand that there's a term for how she feels. Which sparks an issue between her and Budd as he doesn't understand Gracies feelings.

Budd and Gracie do however have a kid together named David. And Gracie loves him to pieces and does her best to raise a good gentleman. She works as a pre k teacher and connects to Lib a lot since they both are in the same career field. She still stays in contact with Giovanni and the two meet up for a drink every now and then.

David is a sweet younge man but is a dumb as rocks. He doesn't do well with sit down and listen to what the teachers tell you, he's more hands on. Which is why he can't tell you what 12 x 12 is but he can go on on and on about sports, especially foot ball! Explaining just how to throw the ball just right or the different positions in a foot ball team. He does tutoring to help him get his grades up so he can stay on his school's football team.

He's fairly popular around the school and always sparks up a conversation with Valerie whenever she comes and takes the teams pictures for news paper or year book. Joking around how their basically cousins, much to Valerie's dismay.

He helps Budd out in the bakery on the weekends and after his tutoring sessions and foot ball practice. Coming straight to the store ready to work until it's time to close. It's a routine that Budds been putting him on for years and he's enforced it a lot ever since Budd let David join the foot ball team. Wanting to make sure that David stays out of trouble and not go around doing things he shouldn't. Which it isn't like David would do anything, he knows better then to go out and do dumb things. It's no use trying to argue with Budd over it though, so the only day that David isn't working is on Fridays for his games.

And my favorite part of creating characters! Voice claims!!!

David is my favorite one! Chicken Joe's Voice is just so great to listen too!

[winderlylandchime]

(1/2)The man came inside after a cigarette break, jumped right into 2x14, saw Justin dancing on the bar, paused the episode and went outside for another smoke. So i think he is handling it well. He is now back and his immediate reaction is ‘THIS IS BULLSHIT! Why are they making him do this, i know its his own doing BUT COME ON.. OH SO THEY KNOW WHAT HAPPENED? My dudes, my bros, my mens..why aren’t we throwing punches yet?..oh Brian is pissed off! Why doesnt he say something? what is that freak of a fuck giving him? JUSTIN DONT TAKE ANY DRUGS FROM HIM’ *pauses the tv on Brian* ‘see the problem is that he looks very pretty when he is in a bad mood’ *throws his hands up in the air* ‘PICKLE GUY!!!!!!!! Oh pickle guy and Emy are going on a world trip!! I can’t wait! Theyre gonna have so much fun…oh she’s still being a bitch to Ben? Man fuck her, i thought she was better with him?’…’oh Brian knows about his classes! I swear i am totally normal about this! But like, i didnt even know my own classes but Brian knows Justins? Oh Brian is angry.. good for him! I like this! I mean I don’t like the Justin part but i do like Brian being all for his education and shit. That’s nice! I want more of that but less of that other shit.’ ‘I thought we wrapped up with cop bullshit? Why the hell is he here? Yeah, what are you doing her- SAY WHAT NOW? HE ASKED WHAT NOW? exactly debbie! Tell him! WE *points to her and himself* do not date or fuck cops!’ He high fived debbie on tv bc he’s happy she turned doen the cop..’brian actually showed up for Emmetts going away at work? I LOVE EMY AND BRI BRI!!! Oh for fucks sake justin! Just take the fucking money! You arent doing a very good job at looking out for yourself right now, that man is an evil evil little freak! And Brian clearly knows it!’ And the scene with Vic and Debbie is up. ‘exactly Debbie, he is a homophobe!! VIC MY BOY WHAT? HE DIDNT MAKE A TINY JOKE HE MADE A BAD JOKE! He doesnt need enlightening, what he needs is my foot so far up his ass his own mom can feel it! Why is vic being dumb? At least debbie knows he’s a homophobe. VIC STOP THIS MADNESS!’ ‘Oh look Justin remembered he has a school! Its Brian! I like this, i would like more of them hanging out. Justin doing his homework and Brian being with him. AFTER HOURS PARTY?! Absolutely not! Oh Brian knows this is bad news. Brian please stop this madness! *pauses tv on Justin* dude, me and Brian are trying so hard to get to you and you won’t listen to either one of us and honestly, it’s not cute!’ And now he is groaning loudly because Debbie is going on a date. ‘The problem i have is, this would be a cute moment if he wasn’t a…you know *said in a very disapproving way* a cop. OH THE FUCKING IRONY OF MIKE AND OH MY FUCKING GOD I DIDNT EVEN REALIZE IT OH MY GOD OH MY GOD SHE IS A HYPOCRITE OF A WHOLE NEW LEVEL. Oh fuck her times 70.’ And now the plane scene is up and i am not ready ‘AHHH PICKLE GUY AND EMY ARE ON A TRIP!! I need them to give me a cute little montage of them having cute moments all over the world! Like some italian music that’s upbeat and just random snapshots of them! YES I WANT THAT! Ohhhh they are gonna get down and dirty in the bathroom!! Gross but have fun babies, you deserve it!’ He is currently scoffing at everything Carl says ‘Debbie.. come on. You cant even look at Ben and say hi to him and you see nothing wrong with Car- oh thats why she said into him, theyre the same. Assholes!’ I am not ready for whats about to happen, i always get sad but i am not ready for this. ‘Oh look at them going at it! Hell yeah Pickle Guy and Emy live your best lif-*he is genuinely on the verge of tears* pickle guy?..pickle..? Is he. noooooooooooo PICKLE GUY! *he is actually crying at this point* PICKLE GUY NO! What about the world trip! And italy! And cute montage! Pickle’ He is genuinely sad and honestly same.

OH POOR BROTHER ANON, mourning the loss of Pickle Man (do not let him eat a pickle in his memory).

Your brother is right - We Do Not Fuck Cops in this house. ACAB. He’s going to be very disappointed in Debbie (again)

I love that he and Brian are now a team trying to get Justin to listen to reason.

Okay… let’s get to the next one because a couple of us have been wondering how Brother Anon was going to respond to Justin topping…

[yourqueenb]

Out of all the mystery books on Choices, were there any that you found particularly fun and/or well written? I'm not sure if it's just me bcs it might be a matter of taste which is super subjective, but something about the way PB does mystery stuff feels kinda...lackluster? I'm not sure what exactly it is about their mystery books (like TUH and MAH), but while they're not necessarily terrible they usually don't feel super satisfying

It’s def not just you. Idk how many times I’ve talked about this, but PB can’t do mystery. I believe that 100%. Maybe in the very beginning they could because I remember enjoying Most Wanted. But I haven’t played it in forever. And all of their mystery books after that have been lackluster as you said. (And I do mean all of them, including VoS and CoP, which are fan favorites).

I think one of the issues is that they always feel the need to make us investigate whatever noble pursuit the person had along with their death. And they really play up the fact that the victim was basically a saint and loved by all. And it’s just like 9 times out of 10, I do not care. It gets annoying and old. One of the other issues is that they also always do the collectibles for clues and stuff. And it’s usually either that you need almost all of them to understand whodunnit, how, and why (see: TUH) or pretty much none of them because they’re actually just extra pieces of information that aren’t all that interesting (see: MaH). Of course the former is worse because paywalling plot/other important story aspects is flat out ridiculous. But the latter annoys me too because premium content should add something to the story, not just little factoids.

I think writing a mystery book is a balancing act. And we all know PB already struggles with balance outside of that. They don’t know how to set the stage, build intrigue, and stop throwing in red herrings to let the story come to a conclusion at the right time. Or if they do manage to build intrigue, they still can’t craft a proper twist that feels shocking but makes sense/is believable at the same time. So that’s why VoS had a good setting/all that suspense throughout, but fell flat in the end. And that’s also why MaH never really found it’s footing as a mystery to begin with imo.

Didn’t intend to write an essay, so last issue I’ll speak on is the fact that PB also rarely writes good villains/a good dynamic between the MC and the villain. I think what their mystery books are missing is the feeling that whatever we’re investigating is a puzzle that needs to be solved. And one of the ways they could create that is by writing both villains/antagonists and MCs who are actually intelligent and fun to go up against/play as! It’s usually that the villain is 10 steps ahead. And not because he/she is particularly crafty but because they dumb MC down to drag the story out for 16-20 chapters. CoP is an exception because MC was actually pretty smart, but we had the dumbass murderer and her even dumber minion. So I truly believe that if we had characters who didn’t just bumble their way through the story and were legitimately formidable adversaries to each other, we would have a lot more fun maneuvering around the obstacles/red herrings/etc. thrown at us and solving the mystery OR being surprised by the twist/resolution but able to pick up the breadcrumbs and connect the dots after it’s revealed