#but at the end of the day the MC made him a WORSE person and he KNEW that and was trying to ESCAPE from it. He should have been allowed to.
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catcatb0y · 3 months ago
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I ran out of tag... (It's mostly like two things that end up becoming annoyingly intertwined the more the series goes on). He was only powerful when it was convenient to the power scaling, which led to him being constantly put in otherwise intensely traumatizing victim situations solely to spur the main character into saving him no matter the cost. Which normally would have only furthered his unrealistic inferiority complex (and also his fear of weakness as well as distaste for weak people given how many people VICTIM BLAMED HIM, which you'd think would only confirm his fucking bias??) which OOPS was made into a... realistic inferiority complex?? Somehow solely to show that the MC somehow managed to grow past the underdog he never fucking was, and since the fans adored this, that became his only character! Yeah, somehow THAT was his big character growth...
He went from a complex, morally grey character to UwU empty ship fodder, and the fans of the series ate it up SO much that one of the main villains (one of the only people who genuinely acknowledged the strength and horrible treatment of my silly guy) telling him 'You're useless actually, I just want to kill you to make that other kid sad lol-' is seen as his PEAK. That. That's his peak. That's the "good ol days" the shipdom romantacizes. A villain poking at his weakness and deepest insecurity is somehow the canonizing moment of the ship (and it doesn't even happen, MC gets mad at his best friend's death for three seconds and then effortlessly kicks the villain's ass, as like the shittiest cherry on top) < it only gets worse from there!
I was also a shipper back in the day, and, in hindsight, I really should have seen the whole shitshow coming, but unfortunately I went on to dedicate six years to this hyperfixation that continues to haunt me three years after I attempted to quit the fandom cold turkey. It didn't even work.
reblog this with one canon thing you dislike / think is flawed about your blorbo and/or the way they were written
#the sheer inconsistency of the writing#deadass the story relied SO much on Tell Not Show that one of the STRONGEST main characters (in the MC's age range at LEAST)#is constantly and continuously victimized#and this is supposed to be his 'character growth'#but because him constantly being put in victim situations ties him to the main character everybody cheers and makes him into ship fodder#the SERIES in its finale made him into ship fodder but ofc it's a damn anime so gay people can't ACTUALLY exist#so his entire character- being the ONLY one that had growth being one of the most HARDWORKING and DEDICATED mfs on the cast-#ended up being absolutelt nothing.#at thr end of the day his BIGGEST FEAR FROM DAY ONE was just randomly canonized and his 'growth' turned into...#accepting the inferiority complex he had built up for himself based on absolutely NOTHING#to the point where ONE OF THE GODDAMNED VILLAINS tells him his only worth is his closeness to the MC and would you GUESS#people. fucking. cheered.#like there are soooo many things I could rant about this guy#first of all constantly being stuck as a victim doesn't actually make you sympathetic?? and it was almost ALWAYS at the negligence of the#adults around him. He was an ASSHOLE yeah but he was a TEENAGER who learned everything from the adults around him#only for those very same fuckers to turn around and verbally and PHYSICALLY berate or degrade him for upholding the values THEY INSTILED#second-ish the fact that he's contextually one of the strongest main characters in the entire series yet he CONSTANTLY gets nerfed#and forced into otherwise incredibly traumatic situations that would have HINDERED HIS PRE-EXISTING GROWTH- and it's all to make the#'underdog MC' shine and get the glory of saving the dude who HATES HIM. JUST LEAVE HIM ALONE MAN. THAT IS WHAT HE IS ASKING.#MC isn't even treated like an underdog either. He gets things SO effortlessly it makes you wonder why the hell everyone else even works#the series is RELIANT on his victimization. but it ties him into a ship he doesn't want to be in so people eat it up#then despite EVERYTHING he's been through HE UNDERGOES SEVERE CHARACTER GROWTH#he COMES TO TERMS with his tendency of lashing out and apologizes to the MC for treating him poorly due to his made up inferiority complex#and from then on it's just treated like a Canon Fact he is and always was inferior to this guy who put in. almost none of the actual work.#at the VERY least the series from the MC'a perspective shows the fact that he heavily idolized and looked up to my boy#but then the shift in perspective and suddenly every interaction with them is fucking 'he's ahead of me like he always has been'#buddy his fucking battle tactic is throwing himself into a lion's den and sheepishly laughing when he comes back burtally maimed. what.#what was once OBVIOUS BIAS became somehow OBJECTIVE FACT in order to half fucking traumabond this kid to someone who made him feel like shit#and that's not to say his actions towards said kid were excuseable- he was a bully and an asshole! Both things the MC just elects to ignore?#but at the end of the day the MC made him a WORSE person and he KNEW that and was trying to ESCAPE from it. He should have been allowed to.
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promptedwordsmith · 3 months ago
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I love your headcannons so I gotta put an ask in here. As we all know, MC can act a bit childish and is quick to push touch/affection away.
It makes me think of the quote, "If you touch me without violence, you'll be the first". Would love a writing about it.
Aw thank you! I hope this is what you meant <3
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Caleb
The first time Caleb touched you, you flinched.
It was barely anything—a fleeting brush of his fingers against yours as he handed you something, an innocent, meaningless gesture—but your entire body stiffened, your breath hitched, and before you even realized it, you had yanked your hand back.
The warmth of his skin lingered, and you hated it.
Caleb noticed. Of course, he did. His sharp violet eyes flickered with something unreadable, but he didn’t say anything. Not then.
But he never stopped touching you.
Not in a way that was forceful or overwhelming. Never in a way that felt like he was trying to push you past your boundaries. But it was there—the careful way his shoulder would bump into yours when you walked side by side, the way he’d place his hand on your lower back as he guided you through a crowd, the way his fingers would brush against your wrist when he passed you something.
Each time, your reaction was the same. A flinch. A step back. A refusal.
At first, he gave you space. He didn’t push, didn’t question. Caleb wasn’t the type to force someone into anything they weren’t ready for. But he wasn’t blind either. He saw the way your guard never dropped, the way your muscles tensed at even the gentlest touch.
And then, one night, he finally asked.
You were both standing outside, the city lights stretching far into the distance, stars barely visible beyond the haze. It was quiet between you, peaceful, until he broke it with a simple question.
“Why do you hate being touched?”
You froze.
Your fingers curled into fists, your heart hammering against your ribs. You wanted to ignore him, wanted to pretend you hadn’t heard, but Caleb wasn’t the kind of person who let things slide.
When you didn’t answer, he turned to face you fully, his voice steady but softer than usual. “It’s not just me, is it?” His eyes searched yours. “You don’t let anyone touch you.”
You swallowed hard.
And then you said it. The words that had been sitting on your tongue for years, unspoken, buried beneath layers of defense and survival.
“If you touch me without violence, you’ll be the first.”
The weight of those words crushed the space between you.
Caleb didn’t react right away. He didn’t wince, didn’t gasp, didn’t give you that pitying look you dreaded seeing. Instead, he just stood there, his violet gaze locked onto yours, taking in everything you weren’t saying.
You braced yourself for rejection, for discomfort, for him to leave—but he didn’t.
Instead, after a long pause, he let out a slow breath and said, “…Then I guess I’ll have to be first.”
Your stomach twisted. “Caleb—”
“I won’t push you.” His voice was firm but patient. “I won’t touch you until you let me.”
That should’ve been the end of it. It should’ve been the part where you turned away and let him go, where he accepted your boundaries and never tried again.
But the problem was Caleb never stopped caring about you.
And worse? You had let yourself care about him too.
Caleb never tried to force his way into your space, never laid a hand on you without permission. But he stayed.
He stayed through the silence, through the bad days, through the moments when you wanted to push everyone away but couldn’t bring yourself to do it with him.
He made himself a constant.
And that was dangerous.
Because the longer he stayed, the more you caught yourself wanting to reach for him.
The more you caught yourself watching his hands—the same hands that had held weapons, that had taken lives, that had commanded entire fleets—and wondering how they would feel if they touched you gently.
The more you caught yourself leaning in just a little when he stood beside you, like some part of you was trying to unlearn a lifetime of flinching.
You weren’t used to it.
You weren’t used to someone treating you like you were something precious instead of something hardened. You weren’t used to someone looking at you like you were worth waiting for.
And it scared you.
Because if you let yourself have this, if you let him in—what then?
It happened one night when you weren’t thinking.
You had both been caught in a battle, pushed to your limits, and despite everything—despite all the odds—you had both made it out alive.
Caleb was covered in cuts and bruises, exhaustion heavy in his limbs, but the moment he saw you stumble, he reached for you instinctively—just like he always did.
And this time, for the first time, you didn’t pull away.
His hands found your arms, steadying you, grounding you. You felt his warmth, his strength—and you let him hold you.
It was so small. So insignificant in the grand scheme of things. Just his hands on your arms, steady and reassuring. But to you, it felt like something shattered.
Caleb stilled, his grip light, as if he half-expected you to come to your senses and shove him away. His eyes searched yours, cautious, waiting.
But you didn’t move.
For the first time, you let yourself be touched without bracing for pain.
Without expecting violence.
Without fear.
And the look Caleb gave you in that moment—soft, careful, like he knew exactly how much this meant even if you hadn’t said a word—was enough to make something inside you break.
You swallowed hard, pulse racing.
“You’re the first.” The words slipped out before you could stop them, barely a whisper, but Caleb heard them.
He exhaled slowly, his thumb brushing the edge of your sleeve in the gentlest motion imaginable.
“Then I’ll make sure I’m never the last.”
And you believed him.
For the first time in your life, you actually believed someone.
Because Caleb had never broken a promise to you before.
And deep down, you knew he never would.
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Rafayel
Rafayel had always been affectionate—too affectionate, if you were being honest. It wasn’t just the teasing smirks or the casual way he draped himself over you like a cat seeking warmth. It was the way his hands would linger, the way his gaze softened when he looked at you, the way he spoke your name like it was something precious.
But you weren’t used to it.
So, when he leaned in too close, when his fingers brushed against yours absentmindedly, when his warmth wrapped around you in unspoken promises of safety, you pushed him away. Not roughly, not cruelly, but firm enough to make the message clear.
He didn’t take offense, at least not outwardly. Rafayel always bounced back with a lopsided grin, a lazy roll of his shoulders, as if to say, Fine, I’ll wait. But there was something in his eyes—something quieter, something more knowing.
And you hated that.
Because deep down, you knew what he saw.
He saw the way you flinched, even when his touch was gentle. He saw the way your shoulders tensed whenever he got too close, the way you shrank away from affection like it was a foreign language you never learned to speak.
Most people didn’t notice. Most people assumed you were just distant, that maybe you simply weren’t the affectionate type.
Rafayel knew better.
And that made him dangerous.
It started one evening, after one of his exhibitions. The gallery had emptied out, the patrons long gone, and yet he lingered, still basking in the afterglow of another successful night. You had stayed behind too, for reasons you weren’t entirely sure of. Maybe because he had asked. Maybe because it was easier than saying no to him.
He had pulled you into the back room where his latest painting was covered with a cloth. With a dramatic flourish, he yanked it away, revealing the canvas beneath.
It was you.
Not a perfect replica, not a stiff, lifeless portrait. It was you in motion, caught mid-laugh, the golden glow of light flickering behind you as if you were something divine.
It took your breath away.
You swallowed hard, shifting your weight from one foot to the other. “You painted this?”
“No, it painted itself.” Rafayel smirked, stepping closer. “Of course I painted it.”
You didn’t have words. You didn’t know how to process something so raw, so intimate. It was one thing for someone to look at you, but it was another thing entirely for someone to see you. And Rafayel had always seen you.
That was the problem.
“I—” The words stuck to your throat. You weren’t good at this. At accepting things. At being loved without conditions, without expectations.
And then, just like always, Rafayel reached for you.
His fingers, long and paint-stained, brushed against your wrist—light, hesitant, careful. No force, no demand, just warmth.
And just like always, you flinched.
You stepped back so fast you almost knocked over the easel. “Don’t.” The word escaped before you could stop it, sharp and unsteady.
Rafayel’s hand froze midair before he slowly pulled it back. His expression didn’t falter, but there was something—something—in his eyes. He tilted his head, studying you with that same knowing look that had always unsettled you.
“Why?” His voice was soft. Not teasing. Not mocking. Just curious.
Your throat tightened. You wanted to tell him to drop it. You wanted him to go back to making jokes, to fill the silence with something light, something meaningless.
But he didn’t.
Because Rafayel never let things go.
You swallowed. “Because… if you touch me without violence, you’ll be the first.”
The words hung between you, heavy and raw.
For a moment, there was silence.
Then Rafayel exhaled, slow and careful, as if he were afraid of shattering you. “Oh.”
He didn’t say anything else. He didn’t apologize, didn’t pity you. He just stood there, watching you with those piercing blue-pink eyes of his, like he was unraveling all the pieces of you you’d kept hidden for so long.
It made you want to run.
And maybe he saw that too, because he took a step back. Gave you space.
“Okay,” he said simply.
You blinked. “Okay?”
He nodded. “I won’t touch you. Not unless you want me to.”
The simplicity of it made something inside you ache.
You nodded, not trusting your voice.
For the first time in your life, someone didn’t demand. Someone didn’t take.
Someone just waited.
Days passed, and true to his word, Rafayel never touched you. He still leaned into your space, still gave you that infuriatingly charming grin, but his hands never reached for you again. Not once.
And you hated that you noticed.
You noticed the absence of his touch. You noticed the way his fingers twitched when he was excited, the way his hands curled into fists like he had to remind himself not to reach for you. You noticed how much you wanted him to.
It was terrifying.
It was exhilarating.
And one night, when he was sitting beside you, lazily sketching something while you both watched the waves crash against the shore, you made the first move.
It was small. Barely anything.
Just your pinky brushing against his.
But Rafayel noticed.
His breath hitched, and his gaze flickered to you, cautious, questioning.
You didn’t pull away.
Neither did he.
For a long moment, neither of you moved. The air between you felt electric, buzzing with something unspoken, something fragile.
Then Rafayel, ever patient, ever waiting, turned his hand palm-up beneath yours.
An invitation.
Not a demand.
You hesitated, your heart pounding, before slowly—so slowly—you let your fingers slip into his.
Warmth. Solid, steady warmth.
No violence.
No pain.
Just him.
Rafayel said nothing, didn’t make a big deal of it. He just held your hand like it was the most natural thing in the world. Like he had been waiting lifetimes for it.
And maybe, just maybe, you had been waiting too.
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Sylus
The first time Sylus touched you, you flinched.
It was subtle—just a stiffening of your shoulders, a flicker of tension in your stance. But for someone as dangerously observant as Sylus, it was enough. His fingers had barely brushed your wrist—light, almost teasing—as he leaned in to whisper something low in your ear.
And yet, you recoiled.
He didn’t comment on it then, only let a smirk curl at the corner of his lips as if he hadn’t noticed.
But he had.
Of course, he had.
Sylus never missed anything.
Sylus was nothing if not patient.
He had seen resistance before. He had encountered people who feared him, people who worshipped him, people who wanted something from him. But you?
You were different.
You didn’t fear him—you feared being touched.
And that… was fascinating.
So, he tested it.
Little things, at first. A hand at the small of your back as he guided you through a door. A knuckle brushing over your cheek under the excuse of tucking away a stray strand of hair. A moment where he let his fingers graze yours when he passed you something.
Every time, your body tensed—just slightly—but you didn’t pull away.
Not right away.
You always let it happen for a heartbeat longer than necessary, as if waiting for something.
And that was when he knew.
You weren’t just unused to affection.
You were waiting for it to turn into something else.
Something harsher. Something cruel.
Something violent.
And that realization—that truth about you—made his blood burn with something he couldn’t quite name.
The night it finally broke, Sylus hadn’t meant to push too far.
It had been a long evening, tension thrumming beneath the surface between you both like an electric current. You had been irritatingly stubborn during negotiations, as always, challenging him, testing him, making him bite back a smirk as you stood your ground.
But the moment that lingered with him was after, when the night had settled and you had found yourself alone in his office.
He approached you like he always did—without hesitation.
This time, he touched your face, his thumb grazing over your cheek in a slow, deliberate motion. It wasn’t just teasing.
It wasn’t just a test.
It was real.
And you panicked.
You slapped his hand away, hard. The sound cracked through the air, sharp and startling, but Sylus didn’t react. He barely blinked, only watching as you took a step back, breath uneven, eyes wild.
His fingers flexed once before he let them drop to his side.
For a moment, there was silence.
Then, quietly—
"If you touch me without violence, you’ll be the first."
It wasn’t said with anger. It wasn’t a warning or a threat.
It was just… the truth.
And Sylus, for once in his life, didn’t have a response.
Something Unspoken
After that, he changed tactics.
He didn’t stop touching you entirely—no, never that. But he let you decide.
He let you approach him.
He gave you space but stayed close enough that you could always reach him if you wanted to.
And, for a while, you didn’t.
But then—
One night, after an exhausting mission, you sat beside him, close enough that your shoulder brushed against his. You didn’t move away.
Another time, when exhaustion weighed on you, you let him take your wrist to check your pulse, your fingers trembling slightly—but not from fear.
And then, the night that changed everything—
You let him touch your face again.
This time, when his hand cradled your cheek, you leaned into it.
Not much. Just a fraction. Just enough that he could feel the shift.
Just enough for him to know.
And that was all the permission he needed.
Slowly, deliberately, his thumb traced the curve of your jaw, his voice low when he finally spoke:
"I would never hurt you."
Your breath hitched.
He felt it.
He didn’t ask why it was so hard for you to believe him. He didn’t ask who had left you expecting pain from every touch, from every lingering moment.
He only let his hand remain where it was, grounding, steady—yours, if you wanted it.
And finally, you did.
You didn’t say anything that night. You didn’t have to.
But after that, something changed.
Sylus, perceptive as always, noticed immediately.
The way your body no longer tensed at his presence. The way you lingered just a little closer when you stood beside him. The way your fingers, hesitant at first, brushed against the sleeve of his coat as if testing a boundary you weren’t sure you were allowed to cross.
And the way, eventually, you did.
It happened late one evening, when the city outside was silent, the only sounds in the room the distant hum of a record player spinning on low and the soft shuffle of papers on his desk.
You had been sitting across from him, absentmindedly twirling a pen between your fingers when, out of nowhere—you reached for him.
Your hand, small but steady, settled against his.
No hesitation. No flinching. No fear.
Sylus, always composed, almost stopped breathing.
You didn’t say anything, and neither did he.
But his fingers curled over yours, slow, deliberate—a silent promise.
A promise that, for the first time in your life, someone’s touch wouldn’t bring pain.
And that was enough.
For now.
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Xavier
The first time Xavier reached for you, you flinched.
It was instinct, sharp and immediate. His fingers had barely brushed your sleeve before you jerked away, stepping out of reach so fast you nearly tripped over your own feet. His hand hung in the air for a moment before he slowly lowered it, tilting his head as if trying to decipher something unsaid.
You weren’t looking at him, though. You were staring at your own hands, fingers curled into fists at your sides, knuckles tight. Get it together.
"You okay?" His voice was light, easy, like he hadn’t just watched you recoil from his touch as if it burned.
You forced yourself to nod. "Yeah. Just—" You hesitated, then exhaled sharply. "You shouldn’t do that."
Xavier raised an eyebrow. "Do what?"
You lifted your chin, meeting his gaze with something colder than you really felt. "Touch me."
His eyes flickered with something unreadable before his expression shifted back to something more familiar—a smirk, teasing but careful. "Alright," he said, as if it didn’t matter. "No touching."
Except it did matter. Because Xavier wasn’t someone who kept his hands to himself—not in an intrusive way, but in a way that made him feel real. He was the kind of person who nudged you with his elbow when he made a joke, who ruffled your hair just to annoy you, who tugged at your sleeve when he wanted your attention.
But he listened.
For the next few weeks, he was careful. He kept his distance, kept his hands in his pockets, kept a respectable space between the two of you even when it was just the two of you on a mission, walking side by side.
And for some reason, it made your chest ache.
You wanted him close.
You just didn’t know how to let him be.
It wasn’t that you didn’t like him. If anything, that was the problem.
Xavier had wormed his way into your life in a way no one else had before. He was constant—too constant, maybe. There was no hesitation in the way he cared, no moment of doubt in his affection. He liked you, so he showed it. He wanted to be around you, so he was. There was no second-guessing, no caution.
You didn’t know what to do with that.
Because affection had always come with conditions. Because touches had always been accompanied by something sharp—by expectation, by control, by violence.
So the idea of Xavier touching you with nothing but warmth?
It scared you more than any fight ever had.
"You ever gonna tell me why?"
You blinked up from where you sat at the edge of a rooftop, staring out at the cityscape below. Xavier was standing a few feet away, arms crossed, gaze unreadable.
"Why what?"
"Why you don’t like me touching you." His voice wasn’t accusing, wasn’t pushing—it was just curious.
You swallowed. "I just don’t."
Xavier hummed, as if considering that. "You sure about that?"
You tensed. "What’s that supposed to mean?"
He shrugged, stepping forward—not close, but closer. "I’ve seen the way you look at me sometimes."
Your heart skipped. "I don’t—"
"You do," he interrupted, voice softer now. "Like you want me to reach for you, but you don’t know if you should let me."
You exhaled sharply. "It’s not that simple."
"Then explain it to me."
Your fingers curled against the fabric of your sleeves, gripping tightly. You should have expected this—Xavier wasn’t the type to let things go so easily. He was patient, sure, but he wasn’t blind. He noticed things, noticed you.
And now, he was waiting.
You stared at your hands. "If you touch me without violence," you murmured, voice barely above a whisper, "you’ll be the first."
Silence.
For a moment, you thought he might not have heard you. But then, after a long pause, Xavier let out a quiet breath.
"That’s a damn shame," he said. His voice was soft, but not pitying. "Because you deserve better than that."
You didn’t look at him. "Maybe."
"You do," he said, firmer this time. "And I want to prove it to you."
Your breath hitched. "Xavier—"
"I won’t touch you until you want me to," he promised. "But when you do?" His gaze was steady, unwavering. "I’ll make sure you never have to doubt it."
It took time.
Xavier kept his promise. He didn’t touch you—not even accidentally. He was careful, patient in a way that made your chest ache. But he never pulled away emotionally. He was still there, still unwavering, still him.
And slowly, slowly, you started to realize something.
You wanted to close that distance.
You wanted him.
It started small—lingering closer when you walked together, sitting next to him instead of across the room, letting your shoulders brush just slightly before pulling away. And Xavier noticed. He always did.
But he didn’t push.
He let you take your time, let you move at your own pace.
Until one night, after a mission, when you were exhausted and sore and tired of your own fear, you turned to him and—hesitantly, carefully—reached for his hand.
His fingers twitched in surprise, but he didn’t hesitate. He let you take his hand in yours, let you squeeze it lightly before letting go just as quickly.
You expected him to say something—maybe tease you, maybe push for more. But he didn’t. He just smiled, warm and real.
"Was that so bad?" he asked, amusement lacing his tone.
You huffed, rolling your eyes. "Shut up."
Xavier chuckled, but there was something softer in his gaze. "Alright. No teasing. Not today, anyway."
You nudged him lightly with your elbow. "I hate you."
He grinned. "You love me."
You paused.
Then, quietly, you admitted, "Yeah."
Xavier stilled. His smile faltered—just for a second—before it softened into something genuine. Something real.
"Good," he murmured.
And for the first time, when he reached for you, you didn’t pull away.
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Zayne
Zayne had always been patient. It was in his nature, woven into the fabric of his being just as much as his steady hands and level-headed presence. As a surgeon, patience was a necessity—an unwavering calm in the face of pressure, a stillness when chaos reigned.
But this was different.
This was you.
You, with your guarded eyes and the walls you built around yourself so high that even he, with all his skill, couldn’t navigate them easily. He had known from the start that you were different—not because you were difficult, not because you weren’t capable of love, but because the world had been cruel to you in ways it hadn’t been to him.
And still, he wanted you.
It started slow. The quiet companionship, the moments where neither of you needed to speak but simply existed together. A shared cup of tea in the morning. The warmth of his coat draped over your shoulders on a cold night. He never pushed, never asked for more than you could give, and yet…
Even he had limits to his patience.
Zayne had always been affectionate. Not in a way that was overwhelming, nor in grand declarations. No, his love was in the small things—in the way his fingers would brush against yours when passing you something, in the way his voice would soften when speaking your name, in the way he would lean in, close enough that you could feel his warmth but never quite touching.
And so, when he reached for you one evening—just a simple touch, the lightest brush of his fingertips against your wrist—he hadn’t expected you to recoil the way you did.
You flinched, your entire body going rigid, as if his touch had burned you.
Zayne froze. His hazel-green eyes flickered with something unreadable before he slowly withdrew his hand, watching you carefully. He wasn’t offended, nor was he hurt, but there was something in his expression that made your stomach twist.
“Don’t,” you whispered, your voice quieter than you intended.
His brows furrowed slightly. “I—”
“If you touch me without violence, you’ll be the first.”
The words tumbled out before you could stop them, raw and sharp. The room felt heavier in their wake, like the air had been sucked from it.
Zayne didn’t speak for a moment. He simply looked at you, studying you in that careful way he always did—like he was dissecting a puzzle, trying to understand without breaking it further.
You hated the silence. Hated the way it stretched between you like an open wound.
Then, finally, he exhaled softly.
“I see.”
And just like that, he shifted back, putting a comfortable distance between you. Not out of rejection, not out of frustration, but because he understood. He always understood.
You expected him to ask. To pry. To demand to know what had led you to this—why you had flinched, why you had spoken those words with such bitterness. But he didn’t.
He simply nodded, accepting it as fact, and changed the subject.
It should have been a relief.
It wasn’t.
Because Zayne, for all his patience and for all his understanding, was not one to simply forget.
Days passed. Then weeks.
Zayne hadn’t touched you since.
Not in the way he used to. No fleeting brushes of his fingertips, no teasing nudges, no quiet, lingering moments where his warmth bled into yours. It was as if he had drawn a line in the sand and refused to cross it.
You told yourself it was for the best.
So why did it feel so much worse?
You had never needed touch. Never craved it, never longed for it. But now, in the absence of it, you felt its loss like a phantom pain. You missed it.
You missed him.
And so, when you found yourself standing outside his apartment one evening, your fingers curled into fists at your sides, you knew you had to do something.
The door opened before you could even knock.
Zayne blinked at you, surprised but not displeased. He stepped aside, wordlessly inviting you in.
You hesitated.
And then, taking a deep breath, you walked past him, into the familiar warmth of his home.
He didn’t ask why you were there.
He simply poured you tea, as he always did, and waited.
You stared at the cup in your hands, fingers tightening around the ceramic.
“I don’t…” You hesitated. “I don’t want you to stop.”
Zayne tilted his head slightly, watching you with quiet patience. “Stop what?”
You swallowed. “Touching me.”
For the first time in a long while, he seemed genuinely surprised. Not in a dramatic way—Zayne was never dramatic—but in the way his fingers stilled against his cup, in the way his gaze softened ever so slightly.
“I thought that’s what you wanted,” he said, his voice as steady as ever.
“I did.” Your throat felt tight. “I do. But I also… I don’t know.” You exhaled sharply. “I just… don’t want you to stop trying.”
Something in his expression shifted.
He set his cup down carefully before looking at you with an intensity that made your stomach twist. Not with judgment, not with pity—just understanding.
“I never stopped,” he murmured.
Your breath hitched.
“I just adjusted,” he continued. “To what you needed.”
And you realized, with startling clarity, that he had been touching you. Just not in the way you had expected.
It was in the way he always made you tea, the way he listened so intently, the way he never pushed, never pried, but always made sure you knew he was there.
He had been touching you in the only way you would allow.
And now? Now, you wanted more.
Tentatively, hesitantly, you reached out.
Your fingers brushed against the back of his hand, and you felt him still beneath your touch.
It was light. Barely there. But it was enough.
Zayne didn’t move. Didn’t push for more.
He simply let you choose.
And, for the first time in your life, you did.
You let yourself be touched—gently, without violence, without fear.
Zayne, patient as ever, simply held still and let you set the pace.
And maybe, just maybe, for the first time in a long time, you weren’t afraid.
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hallowxiu · 1 year ago
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How the Brothers Would Deal with MC's Mortality
Mammon:
You casually brought it up as a joke
Probably something like “i’m here for a good time, not a long time” or “why should i care what happens in 100 years? It’s not like i’ll be around to care”
Would probably confuse Mammon at first as to why you wouldn’t be around, but he would put the pieces together in the middle of the night when trying to sleep.
A whole, eyes snapping wide opening and flinging out of his bed kind of moment.
Mammon would worry himself sick
Yes, he knows humans can die, hell, he used to mock you for being so frail when you first came to the Devildom, but now? 
Well, now things are different. How he feels about you is different
He's spending all his money on ways to keep you kicking longer. 
Anything he can think of that’ll help, he’s buying it. Vegetables, fruits, protein powder, comfortable clothes, a nice pillow, vitamins, shampoos- anything. He has no idea where to start, so he just starts grabbing everything. 
I mean, something will have to help, right? 
If you notice he looks panicked, don’t point it out, it’ll only make it worse. Unless you want to be smothered to death from his affection and worry, then by all means. ;)
Leviathan:
Look, he can barely handle his favorite anime characters dying, so you? Yeah, no, that’s way too much. 
Nothing actually popped up to remind Leviathan of your mortality, it was because of Satan throwing his books all around the house that did it. 
Suddenly, it was all he could think about. How did he not think of this before? 
Leviathan is no Satan though, and he’s certainly not Lucifer. Researching medical documents and trying to think of things to keep you alive longer are a little over his head. That being said, there were some things he could do.
Leviathan dove into his own research that would be within his realm of understanding, studying that humans who have more positive mindsets and who are less exposed to depressing forms of media, may live longer than the average person. This- this was something he could work with. 
Suddenly, you were constantly being invited to his room, Leviathan having a variety of slice-of-life anime for you to watch with him, all of which had happy endings to boot. If an anime was even remotely depressing, he made sure to keep that out of reach. 
Video games? He’s keeping it safe; he’s not risking anything here. If it’s not similar to Stardew Valley, Animal Crossing, Dreamlight Valley, or The Sims (which must be on a good day), you’re just not playing it. Kingdom Hearts if you’re lucky. 
Satan:
Would do an insane amount of research 
Likely overheard the topic on a news segment about the tragically short lifespans of humans before it all clicked together.
Satan, unlike the other brothers, has never experienced death before, so while it sounds silly, he never had reason to think of you dying.
Looks up humans who had long lifespans to see how he can implement those things into your lifestyle.
Books will be littered everywhere (although that’s not really unusual, but what is would be the topic of said books- The Long Lives of Humans, Human Lifestyle for Dummies 101, The Road to Human Immortality, etc. etc.)
This is when Satan learns just how easy it is for a human to kick the bucket.
Heart attacks, brain aneurysms, strokes, seizures, cancer, the list goes on and on and it’s starting to scare him. He didn’t know humans could just drop dead. 
He’s going to start researching curses to increase your lifespan, or at the very least he’s going to make sure you’re careful as hell. 
You won’t even get as much as a cut without him being aware of it; he’s going to hover around and mother hen the absolute shit out of you. 
Try not to get too annoyed with him though, it all stems from good intentions. 
Asmodeus:
He’ll be damned if his shopping partner for life is going to die on him.
Asmo isn’t stupid; if anything he’s pretty emotionally aware. He's known for a long time just how short the lifespan of humans is.
But still, it came in the form of a nightmare. One where he couldn’t save you, despite giving his best efforts. The way you died was tragic, long before your life should have ended. 
This sent Asmo somewhat into a frenzied state trying to find things to keep you alive once he woke up. 
Vitamins, vitamins, vitamins
Humans benefit from vitamins, right? Surely you’d benefit from Devildom vitamins then. If it’ll increase the lifespan of a demon, he sees no reason why it wouldn’t increase your lifespan. 
Of course, it really only gives you nicer nails and shinier hair. 
He’s 10x more intense with your morning and night routines. 
He will be unloading all his facial creams on you, and telling you the benefits of each one and how it might add a few years to your lifespan. 
You want to stay up late at night to finish homework? Maybe watch a movie? Yeah, no, not on Asmo’s watch. 
Your ass is going to bed every night at 10pm, right along with him. You do realize you’ll be getting exactly 8 hours of sleep each night, too, right? 
Beelzebub:
Regarding his trauma with Lilith, it came as no surprise when he started to fret over your well-being. 
Poor Beel saw an article that discussed how tragically easy it is for a human to die. The cherry on top? How they could die from simply overeating. 
Overeating isn’t a concept Beel is overly familiar with (because to him, it’s never overeating), and while he knew most people couldn’t keep up with his eating habits, he didn’t think it could actually cause harm to a human, let alone kill them. 
Grocery trips are now a more anxiety-inducing event. 
He’s suddenly paranoid that any of the Devildom food could and will kill you. Are you allergic to anything? How would you even know? 
What if one day he serves you his favorite boiled dragonhead and you just drop dead at the dinner table?? No, that will never do. 
There’s a list of Devildom foods that he knows for sure you can have without dying, but then comes the issue of portion control. How much is too much for a human? 
Beelzebub swore he would never lose another loved one again, and it’s a promise he intends to keep. From now on, you will only eat what he deems safe. 
You want to try a new food in the Devildom that you’ve never had before? You better get some seriously good convincing skills if you want him to cave in. For someone who only ever thinks with his stomach, he’s surprisingly stubborn. 
Belphegor:
He’s still plagued with nightmares about Lilith, especially since he still thinks it’s his fault. Tack that on to the way he blamed you and the rest of the human race for it? The man is walking trauma. 
 Like Asmodeus, this was brought on by nightmares about you dying. Different from Asmo’s, however, you usually died by his hand. Naturally, considering your tumultuous history. 
Belphegor, unlike his brothers, takes a different approach. He just doesn’t approach you at all. 
What better way to keep your lifespan long than by staying away from you altogether? 
Is it something that he wants? Of course not! But how can he trust himself to never hurt you again? To never kill you again. 
He can’t. 
So, he locks himself away in his room, sleeping most of the day or just avoiding the areas you normally like to lounge. 
On a normal day, almost everyone in the household, including yourself, would notice this behavior change. However, since you’re now being cornered by all the brothers and their concerns about your lifespan, it’s easy for Belphegor’s absence to slip your mind. 
This hurts Belphegor, but at the end of the day, he believes this is for the best.
Lucifer: 
Lucifer didn’t need a reminder of your short lifespan; if anything, it’s something he’s thought plenty about. 
Lucifer has trauma, we all know that much. After Lilith, he’s absolutely terrified of losing another loved one to something outside of his control.
And your lifespan is not something that’s out of his control. At least not how he sees it, anyway. 
If you thought he was overbearing or overprotective before, brace yourself. He’s going to step it up several notches. 
No excess of junk food, no more pulling all-nighters, no more sitting around the house gaming all day, and definitely no more overexerting your use of magic. He’s no fool, he knows the toll your magic could eventually take on your body. 
Honestly? He wasn’t this bad until his brothers started to panic about your mortality, and though Lucifer told himself he was above such nonsense, he quickly found himself taking all the precautions they were taking (and then some). 
Fortunately, if you find yourself becoming overwhelmed, they’ll be more than willing to listen to you (granted you take some of their concerns into account).
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daddyslittlecrow · 2 months ago
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“Do you hate me?”
Summary: Basically what I WISH happened after MC finds Sylus’ brooch.
Warnings: VERY smutty but with plot (I'm not an animal….yet) MDNI PLEASE 🙏
Pairing: Sylus x reader/MC
A/N: I'm sorry if this is in any way bad. This is the first time I've properly written in years. Please ignore all errors!! I'll cry!!
I've never written anything as spicy as this though so if you’re questioning my logistics or anything, please bare that in mind. Hope you enjoy x
You didn't understand him.
That's what frustrated you the most about the leader of Onychinus. You were usually quick to pick up on a person’s motives towards you. Whether it was a lingering gaze, a twitching hand or a forced smile there was always something they wanted. You didn't just use that power to survive, you used it to always stay ahead. But with Sylus? You could barely even tell if he hated you or was impressed by you.
“Have I underestimated your determination or overestimated your intellect?”
His words this evening echoed in your head, stoking a fire within you. You still hadn't forgiven him for the cruel hospitality during your first few days together. The dark circles under your eyes served as each night as you tried and failed to stop the sound of his gun plaguing your dreams.
Every morning since, you sprang from the soft silk sheets, a scream stuck in your throat and the ghost of his blood splatter on your hands. It felt like he wanted to punish you. Not to mention the horror you witnessed as his right eye blazed through you. Your brain only accepted it as a fucked up hallucination whenever you thought about it too hard.
Even if he wasn’t behind the explosion that killed your best friend, you feared he was capable of far worse. His Evol was violent and forceful, the pain it caused when he wrapped those black tendrils around you was only a fraction of what it could do. You were relieved he couldn't resonate with you and make his power stronger. It would be utter chaos.
Maybe that was his sole motive - to use you to make himself unstoppable. But you knew deep down that wasn't what he was after. Too many questions were left unanswered. His ruby eyes had searched for something far deeper within you, coaxing something that made your stomach clench.
What shamed you most was how the tension travelled lower, heating you up and liquefying your core. He was undeniably attractive but that was it. You just had to play along and get far away from him so you could find someone to quench your long-neglected thirst.
You sighed heavily as you scraped your hair back into a ponytail, aggravated when it got in your way. It didn't matter what Sylus was after. You had your own mission to deal with and you wouldn't let anything or anyone get in the way. That man was not your motive.
A glance at your phone screen reminded you that time was running out for the game Sylus dared you to play. 30 minutes more and your chance to attend the auction and look for the Aether Core slipped from your grasp. He seemed to be losing faith in you with every slam of his bedroom door but fuck it - quitting was never an option for you.
Slowly advancing down the long worn path to Sylus’ door, you opened it silently. You crossed the threshold, cautiously walking further into his elegantly furnished bedroom. The silver-haired monster sat upright in his bed, eyes closed, chest rising and falling in a steady rhythm. He was fast asleep.
You smirked, pulling out the Evol-sealing handcuffs and tranquillizer gun the Twins had offered you. Time to put an end to this childish game once and for all.
————
A war raged within Sylus, threatening to drag him to utter despair. Or madness. He didn't have a preference so long as it dulled the ache that suffocated his heart. No one had ever made him feel threatened or weak since he first arrived in the N109 Zone. Fear was the default response from anyone unlucky enough to meet him face to face and he liked it that way. Power wasn't given. It was taken.
That belief had caused a fatal error when he finally found you. He expected to pull you into his world, where he knew you belonged. You were his. How could you forget that you were the sole reason his heart kept beating? Without you, he was only a shell of a man. He would burn down everything he had carefully built just for you to look at him right now without flinching.
Sylus devoted his life to finding you. It was no coincidence that you found yourself before him. As soon as you put yourself on the line, he tracked you down and took to him before anyone else got their hands on you. Your determination and strength were admirable, but your stubbornness made you reckless. It clouded your judgment and turned you into an easier target than you realized.
And now, nothing could make him let you go.
The shock of you not remembering him made him lash out in the only way he knew how. But that type of force wouldn’t work this time. No, this time, he would have tried something else.
The brief hint of your desire did not go unnoticed. He felt it, like an ache that worsened the longer his eyes locked on yours. As soon as he recognised it, he had to use every ounce of restraint not to claim you. He wanted to consume you in every way you’d allow him to. Replace the ache between your thighs with his hands, mouth and cock. Over and over until the only thing you could think about was him.
If you did not respond well to pain, maybe pleasure was the answer.
————
With his hand securely cuffed to the bed, you wasted no time. It surprised you how easy it was to sneak up on such a well-guarded man. Maybe it was because he didn't see you as a threat? A quiet huff escaped your eyes and trailed down his bare chest. You'd show him just how wrong he was.
Before your fingers could reach him, your wrist was captured in a strong grip. You gasped, snapping your head up to meet the epitome of arrogance. Sylus smirked at his uninvited visitor. The finale of his game couldn't have been more thrilling if he planned it. He welcomed the slight pinch of the handcuffs as he slowly looked you up and down, savouring how close you were.
“What do you plan to do then, since I've become your prey?” His taunt didn't deter you, in fact - it spurred you on. The brooch was yours. With his offer to help you, you finally made contact with his body. Your fingers caressed the expensive robe he wore, hunting for your ticket to the auction. You could feel those piercing eyes on you as he complied with your thorough inspection.
His scent - like spiced leather - made you painfully aware that you were in Sylus’ bed, alone with him. You felt his hand graze your leg, momentarily freezing your body. The thought of swapping places with him, you handcuffed and him towering over you flashed in your mind.
It burned your cheeks but you pressed on, knowing he could do nothing to you in this position. This stupid game had gotten to your head. That was all this was. Still, you couldn't stop yourself from voicing the question that consumed your mind.
“Do you hate me?”
You silently cursed yourself as you pulled your attention back to your mission. Why did you care whether he did or didn't? You swore you would never let anyone make you question your worth. That’s why you only relied on yourself. Never accepted any man’s advances unless it was for a single night of pleasure.
Then it was back to being alone. It was easier that way. You were more than capable of looking after yourself. You refused to look at his face again, your heart pounding furiously. No one had ever gotten under your skin like he did.
“Does my answer matter?”
The unexpected softness in his voice would've made you pause if you hadn't found the brooch that very moment. Your face broke into a triumphant smile as you stared at the sparkling red jewel in the centre. Thank f-
Your eyes widened in horror as the handcuffs holding Sylus hostage disintegrated with his Evol. He assured you he wouldn't go back on his promise. The air grew thick. His eyes darkened, hinting at a new game that had just begun. Neither of you moved. In an instant, Sylus had turned you into his prey. Revenge for assuming he could be yours.
Panic bloomed in your chest, desperately trying to launch yourself away from him. His arm quickly snaked around your waist, throwing you effortlessly into your back. Fear and arousal fought for dominance within you as Sylus gripped your hands, pinning you to the bed.
“What the fuck are you doing?” You spat, trying to grasp some sense of control over yourself. His grip was strong but not painful. Sylus didn't respond immediately, savouring the beautiful sight of you beneath him. A violent shiver hit you as he trailed his gaze from your blushing face, down your thin tank top and shorts, to your bare thighs. Then his eyes moved to lock on yours.
“You look so pretty like this for me, kitten.” His words did something unexplainable to you, a dark promise that made your thighs clench. Noting your sudden reaction, his bare knee slid between your legs, pushing them apart. You were trapped, completely at his mercy. You hated him, didn't you? So why did your body want him closer? As if reading your mind, Sylus let out a low chuckle.
“You aren't usually this quiet, care to indulge me in your thoughts?” The only thing you could do to retaliate was remain silent. Maybe then he would get bored and finally let you go. You struggled against him, trying to slip from his grasp but he only pushed you further into the mattress. “I see. You want to play by your rules? I'm only happy to oblige.”
You didn't need long to guess what he meant. He removed the space between you, claiming your lips with his. The kiss was like a bolt of electricity that coursed through you. Sylus was gentle but firm, moving his mouth as if to savour every moment. It was a stark contrast to how he treated you first.
You felt yourself be dragged down, melting against him. His tongue swiped across your bottom lip, a silent request. You accepted it eagerly, your mind refusing to focus on anything but him.
Sylus was a patient man. After all, he had waited for you all this time. But kissing you, feeling your tongue dance with his as he tasted you? He was close to becoming feral. He had to slow down, not wanting to force you anymore. This was your choice. As much as he didn't act like it, you were still in control. Slowly, his grip on your hands eased until you were free.
He reluctantly pulled away to look at your face, trying to identify what you were thinking. You were panting, lips swollen from him. He was rock hard and straining against his briefs just by kissing you. The loss of his lips released a small whimper as you opened your eyes to look at him. Your teeth bit your bottom lip to stifle the moan that threatened to escape.
No man had ever looked at you like that before. Hungry, possessive, depraved. It made you so wet you could feel your panties start to soak through. You needed him all over you.
But there was also a silent promise in those beautiful eyes. He was not going to continue unless you wanted to. You were worth so much more than that. That alone gave you the security you needed. With your arms now free, you used them to prop yourself up. He watched as you turned over, placing the brooch that was still in your grasp onto his nightstand. His heart quickened but he remained still as you turned back to face him.
“You wanted to know whether it mattered if you hated me?” You began, raising your body to straddle his thigh. Sylus placed his hands on your hips, supporting you, eyes never leaving yours. Afraid that if he moved too suddenly you would run away. Your hands slowly glided across his chest, taking a moment to feel his muscular build.
His pulse pounded against your fingers. The corner of his lip quirked as you grew more bold. Gravity pulled you down, your aching core resting on a hard thigh. Not giving yourself time to think, your body takes control. Instantly you started to move your hips, seeking friction on your throbbing clit.
Knowing he was watching you shamelessly use him to get yourself off was too much. You grew slicker with each thrust and you moaned softly. It was the sexiest sound Sylus ever heard. Your right thigh brushed against his erection and you clenched with need. A low growl and his grip tightened, halting your movements.
“Y/N…” His voice was laced with a warning. Desperately wanting to punish you for teasing him. His cock already leaked with pre-cum, imagining how wet you were for him. Fuck he could practically smell your arousal. But still, he waited.
You leaned towards him, lips against his ear. One of your hands reached down to the belt of his robe, pulling it loose. Sylus - and now the relationship between you both - still confused you. You weren't sure what would come of this. All you knew was that you wanted to stop thinking, just for a while.
“Even if you don't hate me Sylus.” You opened his robe to reveal the outline of his erection. His hips jerked as you palmed his dick through the fabric, getting more lost in your desire for him. “I want you to fuck me like you do.”
That was the undoing of him.
He understood the underlying plea in your words. You weren't ready to face the truth, to acknowledge what existed deep down. Not ready to accept his feelings for you. Not now. But, he hoped, not never.
For now, you needed something else - something raw. And Sylus would do anything to give you what you craved.
You gasped as he threw you back down onto the bed, stealing all power from you. His robe was gone in seconds, puddled on the floor. He smirked at you before he placed his hands on your tank top and roughly ripped it in half. His attention was on your exposed breasts.
“Beautiful.” He murmured before kissing a path from your neck to your chest, stopping just above your left nipple. The compliment squeezed your heart. He looked up at you as you waited, your eyes hazy with lust.
With a flick of his wicked tongue, he caressed the sensitive nub. It hardened instantly. Your back arched, forcing your breast to his mouth as he feasted on you. His hand reached up to grab your other breast, clutching like they were made for him.
Oh, he was going to ruin you.
The pleasure of his mouth made you whine in ecstasy. You felt hot but your body shivered with need. Your hips bucked, seeking relief for your aching pussy. Sylus whipped his hand to your hip, stopping your movements.
“You were brave kitten, teasing me earlier.” He moved down your body without haste. Your impatient moans amused him. “Too bad I don't let bad behaviour go unpunished.” Without warning, he ripped your shorts off, exposing your soaking panties. He admired the patch of wetness that darkened the fabric. He took great pride in knowing he was the one that did this to you.
“You’re already a mess and I haven't even touched you yet.” He slid a finger up your clothed slit, rubbing a lazy circle over your clit.
“Shit.” You sighed against his touch. Hearing that delicious voice speak so filthily made you desperate for more. He chuckled darkly, enjoying watching you squirm from his touch. Let's see how you react to a different kind.
He hooked his fingers onto your panties and slowly pulled them down your legs, revealing your glistening slit. The cool air of the room against your wetness made you acutely aware that you were now fully bare before him. It somewhat sobered you. You moved your legs, in a weak attempt to hide from him.
“Don’t be shy now, kitten.” Sylus hummed in disapproval, pushing your legs even farther apart. You stopped resisting, submitting yourself to his touch. He paused, bewitched by the sight before him. You were magnificent already but when you were like this? Fully spread, eyes pleading. Fuck.
He wanted to release all restraint, free his straining cock and claim you right then. With a shaky breath, he centred himself, needing to see how you fell apart without distraction.
“Is this where you want me to touch you?” His large hand slid up your thigh, grazing the soft lips of your pussy. The teasing touch was agony. Your hand covered your mouth to stop your pleading whine. Sylus huffed, displeased you would deny him your sweet sounds.
Then you yelped.
With perfect precision, Sylus lightly slapped your clit. The attack was a sharp surprise but made your body hum with excitement. He was showing you who your body belonged to right now. With his hand raised again, you immediately brought your attention to his glowing eye. One word filled your head.
Obey.
“Let’s try that again kitten.” Sylus cooed, planting a kiss on your knee. “Do you want me to fuck you with my fingers?” You learnt your lesson quickly.
“Fuck Sylus, yes!” Your words came out in pants. Sylus noticed you practically gush at his words and he used it to coat his finger.
“Good girl.”
His praise was immediately followed by his finger thrusting hard into your pussy. Your arm instinctively rose again to muffle your scream. Immediately your wrists were captured by the black smoky tendrils of Sylus’ Evol.
He fucked his finger into you slowly, adding another once he knew you could take it. It was like he knew every spot that made you arch your back in pure pleasure. His pace was brutal - you never wanted him to stop.
“Do you like that, beautiful?” He purred, coaxing your pleasure like he put on this earth just to please you. He curled his fingers, finding your g-spot. The sensation caused your eyes to roll back, his name the only word you could spill from your lips. Sylus groaned at the sight of you, loving how you fucked his fingers. You were so tight. He couldn't stop thinking about how you’d feel squeezed around his cock.
“That’s it Y/N. Good girl. You're taking my fingers so well. God, you're so fucking wet for me.” You couldn't function, let alone reply to him. All you could do was moan as you rode his fingers.
“You feel…so fucking good.”
All he cared about was having you unravel for him. He kept up the pace of his fingers, driving into you. The wet lewd sounds of your pussy drove you both crazy. His mouth watered as he lowered it to your hard clit, leaving little licks that made you clench around his fingers. You tasted better than he could've imagined. He would gladly spend the rest of his life buried between your thighs.
“I’m not going to stop until you cum all over my mouth and fingers, okay? So be good and give me what I want.” The second his mouth devoured your clit, your release was coming fast. He sucked and licked like he had been starved of you, groaning into your pussy as your hands reached for his hair, pulling you closer. It gave you leverage as you rode his face, desperately chasing your release as the pleasure grew higher and harder.
“Please Sylus. Please I’m so close. I’m-” You came so violently that all you saw were stars. You screamed, not caring if anyone could hear. Your cum gushed out of you, soaking his chest and dripping down onto the sheets. Your pussy milked his fingers as they fucked you through your orgasm.
Sylus lapped at your dripping pussy, savouring your juices until you whimpered his name. You loosened the grip on his silver strands, heart pounding, face flushed. Your whole body buzzed as Sylus reluctantly left your pussy and withdrew his fingers. He kept his eyes locked on yours as he brought them to his mouth, sucking you off them with a smug grin. His actions made your core ache for him all over again.
“One could get addicted to the taste of you.” His voice was thick with lust. You glanced down at his tented briefs with anticipation. Sylus bit back a laugh at your excited gaze. With a glance at the clock on his nightstand, he sighed. Hovering over you he kissed you deeply, letting you taste yourself on his tongue. You were disappointed when he withdrew, pulling you up to sit on the edge of the bed.
“As much as I’d love to continue this, sweetie.” He brushed back the hair that clung to your clammy face. He loved how radiant you looked after you came. It was a sight he wouldn't mind seeing again soon. Your lips were captured one more time in a quick kiss.
“We have an auction to attend.”
—————
If you want a part 2 pls let me know!! I’d hate to leave my man blueballed hanging. I have no confidence in myself to think this is good anyway lol 🤪
-Elle 🫡
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i-messed-up-big-time · 2 months ago
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Lonely Birthday - Caleb
Caleb x Non Mc/Reader
divider creds: @/cafekitsune
a/n: ok this is my longest fic yet (can you tell he's my fav), chat i think i cooked with this one. this will be the last part in my lonely birthday series, i really hope you guys enjoyed it!!
Tags: angst, happy ending, female pronouns, reader is not MC, female pronouns, cursing, reader is childhood friends w/ caleb and MC, MC is a bit of a spoiled brat here (pls dkm), this is set in a timeline where there are no evols and caleb does not die in an explosion, this one acc has a backstory in comparison to the other parts I wrote, just cause jumping right into it with caleb just didnt feel right without a proper backstory, use of pet names (sadly he's not calling you pip-squeak in this one but he does call you baby), mentions of self harm (nothing happens its just a thought that passes), lmk if i missed smth
word count: 5.3k
masterlist
Xavier Rafayel Zayne Sylus
taglist: @rcvcgers
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You were always overshadowed by her, from childhood to adulthood.
To make matters worse, your birthdays were only a couple of days apart, yours coming before hers, because they were so close together your birthdays were always celebrated with her on her birthday.
It was like killing two birds with one stone. Every time you complained about wanting to celebrate your birthday on your actual date you were told it would be unfair for MC.
Your own family favoured her more than you, sometimes you wondered whether they even considered you their daughter at all.
But then there was Caleb. Him and MC were inseparable when you first met her, always there whenever you two hung out. Eventually, you got close to him as well and began to hang outside of your meet ups with MC.
He always made you feel like you were your own person, not a shadow of someone else.
Maybe that's why you fell for him.
Over the course of your childhood leading into your teenage years you were head over heels for him. Anyone could see it was obvious, and to certain people it bothered them, and you never noticed it until it was too late.
●・○・●・○・●・
Despite being the same age as MC, there was one thing you had that she didn't. You were far smarter than those your age, that gave you the ability to skip ahead a couple of grades so that you were at a level that was more to your capabilities.
But your brain could only get you so far in certain circumstances.
You were in the same class as Caleb, so naturally you ended up being closer to him than you were before. It also made admiring him much more easier.
But nothing was ever easy for you. All throughout your school years MC would always barge in on your study time with Caleb, always needing help with her assignments.
Normally, it wouldn't be a problem if it was a one off thing, but anytime you were over at their place to study with Caleb, it became a tutoring session for MC. It was even more annoying when she would constantly brush off your help, only wanting Caleb to help her.
"I don't understand it when you explain it. You're always using difficult words."
MC whined whenever you would offer to help, and each time Caleb would laugh and ruffle her hair.
"It's okay pip-squeak, I'll explain it in simpler terms."
Whenever he would say that, you could feel a pang in your chest.
It was during that time you and MC started to drift apart. You never really understood until that day.
●・○・●・○・●・
The day before graduation you finally chalked up the courage to confess to Caleb, and to your surprise he had accepted.
You had anticipated a rejection, knowing that he was busy with prepping to go to Skyhaven to attend the DAA, and unfortunately a lot of his free time was spent with MC.
He had always been protective of her, he also extended that to you as well. Although the way he treated you was different than the way he treated her.
The fleeting glances, the lingering touches, the nights he would spend with you when things were bad. How could you not fall for a man who cared for you like that.
You thought it was just your delusions that there was something between the two of you, but him accepting your confession made those delusions become reality.
●・○・●・○・●・
Everyone found you guys to be an unexpected couple, they always expected Caleb to be with MC with how good their chemistry was, but he viewed her simply as his little sister. One that he was a little too protective of but you never found that to be a sense of insecurity.
Or so you thought.
You and Caleb had been dating for almost 4 years now. It was a bit rough with both of you pursuing your academics and not having much time to spend together, but you guys always made it work.
Sometimes Caleb would bail on your dates because something came up with his studies, and you believed him. Who knew it was because someone felt a little jealous of you guys spending time together.
You had never realized that the dates Caleb bailed were because someone back in Linkon wanted attention, and who better to ask than Caleb!
You and MC and drifted apart, and after your graduation you barely ever saw her unless you were home for the holidays with Caleb. You chose to be the bigger person whenever she tried to monopolize Caleb's time, knowing he saw you more often than her, you let it slide.
Although, deep down it bothered you that she would always try to be the sole focus of his attention or when you guys went out on a date she just so happened to be there too, turning it into a group hangout where you felt like the third wheel.
Crazy right? Being a third wheel in your own relationship, guess you could cross that off on your bingo card.
It was your birthday tomorrow, you and Caleb had planned a nice day in with him cooking your favourites and then baking a cake together. Both of your schedules had finally managed to align and you guys had a week off, so you planned on crashing at his place for some much needed quality time.
With it being your final year, you guys were buried in back to back assignments and exams, the stress was high. Having the week off let you guys finally have a moment to breathe.
You packed your bags for the week before making your way over to Caleb's place, it wasn't too far of a drive. You made a quick stop at the grocery store, grabbing your favourite snacks and some groceries so you can make him some food while you're at his place.
By the time you got to Caleb's place the sun was just starting to set. You walked into his place, unlocking it with the spare keys he gave you.
It was quiet in his home.
"Hmm seems like Caleb isn't back from his classes yet."
You thought out loud. Putting away your stuff in his room you made your way to the kitchen, wanting to cook Caleb some dinner.
Like magic, as soon as you were done adding the finishing touches to dinner, Caleb walked in.
"Hi baby, it smells good in here."
Caleb greeted you, coming closer to place a kiss on your lips.
You quickly sent him away to go wash up while you set the table. Dinner was nice and peaceful, it was moments like these that made you feel happy. No distractions, just you and Caleb.
You guys spent most of dinner just catching up about all the stuff that happened while you guys were apart. Caleb insisted on cleaning up since you had cooked dinner, so you were sitting on the counter next to the sink as he washed the dishes.
You chatted away mindlessly, he listened with a smile on his face, throwing in a response here and there.
Once he was done, you were about to jump off the counter when Caleb slotted himself between your legs, hands coming to rest on your hips.
You immediately went quiet, the mood shifting to something more intimate. He leaned forward and pressed his forehead against yours, nuzzling your nose with his.
You guys stayed in that position for a little bit, enjoying the moment. The rest of the evening was spent with you guys just lounging around and catching up.
As you were getting ready for bed you could feel your stomach drop with anxiety for no reason, you brushed it off as just your nerves about sharing the same bed with Caleb after a while.
You shouldn't have brushed it off.
You got changed into one of his t-shirts and got into bed, Caleb slid in not too long after, wrapping his arms around your waist to pull you in closer to his chest.
“Goodnight.”
He said as he placed a kiss on the top of your head.
“Goodnight.”
You replied back, snuggling closer into his chest.
●・○・●・○・●・
It was around 4 am when you woke up to feeling an empty bed next to you.
It’s still warm, Caleb must have just gotten up.
You got out of bed to go look for him. The moment you stepped out the your room you spotted him in the living room dressed to go outside.
The alarm bells in your head were going off.
“Hey, where are you going this late at night?”
It was just a simple question, one that didn’t warrant the reaction you were about to receive.
“Out.”
Caleb replied in an oddly cold tone.
What’s with that tone?
“Okay, but that’s not what I asked. Where are you going?”
You asked again, something in your gut was telling you that you were not going to like the answer.
Caleb sighed out in frustration before replying.
“MC called and needed me, so I’m going to Linkon right now. You know how she gets.”
Normally you wouldn’t say anything, but this was supposed to be your time with Caleb, no distractions.
“Why do you always go at the drop of a hat whenever she calls? You’re supposed to be spending time with me, not running to her whenever something doesn’t go her way.”
Years of frustration were finally bubbling to the surface, you didn’t want it to come out but you had to set your boundaries.
“It’s not fair to me as your girlfriend if you keep putting her above me.”
Your voiced raised a bit as you spoke, you didn’t mean for it to but having to constantly deal with MC barging in on your time with Caleb, whether she knew he was with you or not, was beyond irritating.
“I’m not putting her above you, she just requires a bit more care and attention than you do.”
That did it, if you weren’t mad before you definitely were now.
“Excuse me? What’s that supposed to mean?”
“It’s exactly as I said it. MC always feels insecure, even more so when you skipped grades and left her alone. I can’t just ignore her when she calls me asking for help.”
Every explanation that came out of his mouth had you seeing red, you weren’t gonna back down either.
“Don’t you dare try to pin this on me? Just because we were friends didn’t mean that I had to be stuck to her hip 24/7. I skipped those grades cause it benefited me for my future, and if she really was my friend she would’ve been happy for me instead of sulking around like a child.”
That lit a fuse in Caleb, if there was one thing he didn’t tolerate it was anyone saying something about MC, even if it was you.
“You better watch what you say, I won’t tolerate it even it it’s you.”
His tone had you taking a step back, it was a whole different level of cold. You should’ve taken that as your sign to back off and come back to this when you guys were less heated, but who were you if not stubborn.
“Omg how could I ever insult your precious MC. You need to let go of that overprotectiveness you have when it comes to her, it puts me in a tough spot when you go running to her like a dog when its owner calls.”
You probably took it too far with that but you were past the point of no return.
“You’re so infuriating! What do you not understand that MC needs me right now, every moment I spend here on this useless conversation is more time she’s alone.”
He spat back.
I’m infuriating?
That hit a nerve, but you couldn’t let him see that, not until you got all your feelings out.
“I’m infuriating?! What about MC? Every time we get some time together she always fucking ruins it! Can’t I just have all of your attention and time without her trying to barge in? It’s like she’s trying to make it so we don’t spend any time together!”
“God you’re so fucking clingy! I knew I should have listened to MC when she warned me not to date you!”
He yelled that at you, and for the first time since the conversation started you were speechless.
“What?”
Your voice was low and filled with hurt. You couldn’t believe your ears that he would say something like that.
“You heard me. I should have never dated you. I ignored MC when she warned me, I gave you the benefit of the doubt but I should’ve fucking known. MC would have been a better girlfriend than you.”
You could hear your heart breaking, you don’t know if you’d ever recover from this.
Caleb took your silence as an opportunity to walk around you to the door, slamming it behind him.
You felt your knees give out, the tears were streaming down your face in silent pain. You didn’t know he thought of you that way, you didn’t want to think that way but a part of you felt like MC was talking bad about you behind your back. It makes no sense he would say all of that on his own.
Will I always be in her shadow? Is that all I’m worth?
You thought to yourself.
●・○・●・○・●・
God knows how long you were in that position for, no sign of Caleb coming back or any calls or texts. You picked yourself up off the floor and gathered all your things, you’d be damned if you spent another minute in this house where you clearly had no worth.
Throwing on a pair of sweatpants, you made sure to clear everything you had at Caleb’s place, not leaving a single thing behind.
You put everything in your car and drove yourself home. It was 6 in the morning so the roads were starting to get busy but it was quiet enough for you to be lost in thought, a dangerous action while driving. You were so lost in thought you didn’t notice that you were approaching a red light until it was too late.
A car had crashed into your drivers side, and everything went black.
●・○・●・○・●・
*In Linkon*
Caleb had made it outside of MC’s dorm, the argument he had with you weighing heavy on his mind but his first priority was MC.
Who knew that argument would cost him everything.
It didn’t take long before MC threw open the door and jumped into his arms. He returned the hug by patting her on the head before heading inside.
“What happened? Why did you call?”
He asked, although his mind wasn’t entirely present in the moment, it kept drifting back to you.
“Oh no reason, I was just thinking about you and decided to call you. You know it’s my birthday in a couple of days so I wanted you to spend some time with me this weekend.”
For the first time ever, Caleb felt a spark of annoyance at MC’s reasoning. She had called him earlier in tears and said he needed to come quick, he even fought with you before coming here.
Pushing that feeling aside he simply smiled.
“You know I can’t do that pip squeak, I already promised Y/N I would spend my week off with her. We had a bit of an argument before I came here, so I have to go back in a bit to make sure she’s fine.”
He said.
She’ll probably be calmed down by the time I come back.
He thought to himself, boy was he wrong.
MC pouted, not liking how things weren’t playing in her favour, but she planned on trying to come up with another excuse later to get him to stay longer.
●・○・●・○・●・
A couple of hours had passed when he got that heart stopping call.
“Hello is this Caleb Xia? This is Skyhaven Hospital calling about Miss Y/N.”
The nurse spoke in a hurried tone, tt was like someone had knocked the wind out of him.
“Speaking, what happened.”
His anxiety went through the roof, what happened after he left? Did you hurt yourself? But he never say any signs of depression, was he actually putting MC above you so much that he was ignoring your feelings?
His mind was running a mil a minute with each thought progressively getting worse, the guilt from what he said to you when you guys fought was finally kicking in.
“She was involved in a car accident and needs surgery, we require a signature from her guardian to proceed. Are you able to come in right now? It’s urgent.”
“Can I give you my consent over the phone? I’m currently in Linkon and it would take me some time to get back, I don’t want to delay the procedure.”
Although Caleb sounded composed, on the inside he was breaking.
“The surgeon said that should be fine, please do make sure to be here as soon as possible as you need to fill out some forms. We’ll get started on the surgery. Thank you.”
The nurse promptly hung up, leaving Caleb to his thoughts.
Without wasting a moment he got up and made his way to the door. MC had been trying to listen to what was being said on the phone, unable to decipher what was happening based on Caleb’s words alone. Seeing Caleb getting ready to leave she jumped up, trying to stop him.
“Where are you going? You can’t just leave, you basically just got here!”
She grabbed ahold of his arm, trying to physically stop him but it was of no use, he pulled his arm out of her grasp and tried to leave again before she spoke up.
“What excuse did she come up with this time? She does this all the time whenever you and I spend time together.”
Something in him had just snapped, it was like a fog had been lifted. Never in his life did he think he would be here getting upset at MC, but life has a funny way of proving you wrong.
“What are you even talking about, when has she ever done that?”
MC was taken aback, Caleb never questioned her whenever she said anything like this before, he would just spend some time comforting her.
“I don’t have time for this, I’m leaving. I’ll talk to you about this later.”
He said in a curt tone, leaving no room for discussion.
●・○・●・○・●・
Caleb had booked it to Skyhaven, not wanting to waste a single moment.
By the time he made it, the surgery was still ongoing. Grabbing the nearest nurse he asked for an update, unfortunately they didn’t have much of an update to give him aside from the fact that your condition was really bad when you were brought in. You had ran a red light and were hit on the drivers side by oncoming traffic, the other driver made it out with minor injuries and a concussion.
Unfortunately, you weren’t so lucky. You had been brought in with internal bleeding, a broken arm and head trauma. Your recovery period was going to be lengthy, which in turn would also hinder your ability to graduate this year like you had planned, but that was a problem for next time.
Caleb slumped onto on the chairs outside the OR, the time passed by excruciatingly slow.
●・○・●・○・●・
A couple of hours later the operation was finally completed.
Seeing you in that condition physically hurt him, his chest feeling constricted.
“We were able to stop the bleeding but she’s still unconscious, because the head trauma was severe it’ll take some time before she will wake up.”
Caleb nodded, listening to the doctor’s words intently. He followed the nurses to the room where you were going to be recovering, taking a seat next to the bed he held your hand in his.
“I’m sorry, please. Please just wake up soon.”
Sadly you wouldn’t wake up for another two months.
Everyday Caleb would come to take care of you, making sure to change the flowers before they began to wilt, taking responsibility to wash you and take care of your hair, hell he would even do your skincare at night so you’d wake up in perfect condition.
Although he knew deep down inside that nothing he could do could ever make up for the things he said and how he made you feel. Caleb and MC had also grown apart during this time, constantly wishing that he had never went to see her that night, if he didn’t then maybe you’d be awake and smiling next to him instead of lying still on that bed in this lifeless hospital room.
Caleb came in with a fresh bouquet of your favourite flowers, silently he replaced the old ones, making sure to get some fresh water before putting in the new bouquet. Once that was done he made his way to his usual spot, right next to your bed.
Earlier the doctor said you were recovering well, although it would take some time and rehab for you to use your arm again. You’d also be weak from the extended period of time that was spent in bed, but Caleb was nothing if not determined to make sure he was there for you every step of the way.
“Hey baby, it’s me Caleb. You’re probably tired of hearing my voice everyday huh? The doctor says you’re recovering well, you’ll just need some rehab to help you get back into the groove of things when you wake up.”
Caleb kept getting choked up the more he spoke, he just wanted you to wake up, even if you don’t want him anymore, he’d be fine with that.
“I miss you, your voice, your sweet smile, everything. If I could trade spots with you I would. So please, please just wake up. I’m sorry for everything, I’m such a shitty boyfriend aren’t I? I can’t believe I said all of that, on your birthday no less.”
At this point the tears he tried so hard to hold back started streaming down his face. It was hard to keep up that strong front, but he tried because he felt that he didn’t deserve to be sad, not when he’s to blame for you being in this state.
He grabbed a hold of your hand, bringing it to his face hoping to feel something. Anything.
He nuzzled his face in to your hand as he silently cried. It wasn’t long before he was passed out in that chair, still holding your hand to his face.
He felt it in the middle of the night, always the light sleeper he was awake at the slightest of movements. He knew he wasn’t mistaken, he felt your hand twitch for this first time in two months.
He was now wide awake and sitting upright in his seat, watching you closely. That’s when he say it, your hand twitched in his hold, a slight groan escaping your lips, but your eyes had still yet to open.
Caleb had already pressed the call button, the nurses and doctor filling the room in a matter of minutes, that’s when you had finally opened your eyes.
●・○・●・○・●・
A series of tests had been conducted and the doctor had caught you up to speed with everything before you were left alone with Caleb. You avoided looking at him the entire time, it stung, but he couldn’t complain.
You cleared your throat uncomfortably, the dryness getting to you, but before you could even get the water, Caleb had already poured a glass and was holding it out to you.
You silently took it from him and drank it slowly, not wanting to shock your system. It was a struggle, your grip on the glass was weak. It almost slipped out of your hands if not for Caleb holding the bottom of the cup.
Once you were done, Caleb put the glass on the side, reaching out to grab your hands. You pulled them back before he could touch you.
“Why are you here Caleb? Doesn’t MC need you?”
Were you being petty? Yes, the fight that you guys had may have been two months ago for him, but for you it was like it was yesterday. The wounds from his words were still fresh.
You missed the look of hurt that flashed across his face, but it disappeared as quickly as it came.
"You don't get to come in here and think that everything will be fine. I just wanted one week with you, no distractions. All I got in return? You leaving me alone on the morning of my birthday after telling me you should've listened to MC when she told you not to date me?!"
You had tears in your eyes, but you refused to let them escape. You didn't want to let him see just how broken you were about this.
Caleb had nothing to say, how could he? He was the one who put you in this position, he's the reason you ended up in the hospital.
"Please just leave."
Your voice sounded so broken, all he could do was listen to your request even though every cell in his being told him to stay by your side. He chose to just wait outside your room, not wanting to be too far away from you but still wanting to respect your request.
As soon as soon Caleb left the room you let the tears you were holding back fall, your body shook with sobs as everything came crashing down on you.
Even with the morphine you could feel the lingering bits of pain all throughout your body.
You eventually ended up crying yourself to sleep. The silence had Caleb worried, so he had decided to check in on you, seeing that you were asleep he was able to calm himself down a little.
But the sight of your tear stricken face had him clutching his chest in pain, all he wanted to do was take away your pain.
For now, he was just going to try his best to be by your side, no matter how much you pushed him away. He was determined to make things right.
●・○・●・○・●・
A couple of weeks had passed before you were finally released from the hospital.
During that time Caleb was as stubborn as ever, never leaving your side unless it was for classes, he spent the nights next to your bed, watching over you. He was always one step ahead, if you were thinking about food or water, the next second he would have it in front of you.
You didn't want to admit it, you enjoyed having him wait on you hand and foot. But you still weren't ready to forgive him, not yet. You still needed to talk to him about what happened before you could decide where this relationship was headed.
You wanted to give him another chance, seeing how tirelessly he's been taking care of you these past few weeks. You could only assume he was doing the same those two months where you were unconscious.
In the meantime, you decided his punishment would be your silence, not speaking to him unless it was absolutely necessary. Even then you only spoke a few words.
Caleb was currently in class, it was a Friday so that meant he'd home earlier than the other days.
You didn't have much of a choice as to where you'd be staying, Caleb wanted to make sure you were taking all your medication as well as doing the exercises you were assigned for your rehab, he knew how forgetful you could be, and you were in no condition to be staying on your own. So his solution was to have you stay at his place.
Being there brought back bad memories, but you had made up your mind to talk to him about it. If you were going to be staying here you needed to know where you guys stood in each others lives.
You were currently in his room, wanting to take a nap but your mind was too active for you to relax.
It wasn't long before Caleb came home, not seeing you in the living room he immediately made his way towards his room.
The moment he walked in he relaxed, seeing that you were alright. You saw him and thought,
It's now or never.
"We need to talk."
Caleb's heart dropped, his mind went crazy thinking you were about to break up with him. Although he couldn't blame you for wanting to, but he refused to let you go, you were the only good thing he had in his life, he couldn't afford to lose you. Not before he had a chance to make things right.
"Okay."
He said as calmly as possible, not wanting to give away the immense anxiety he was feeling from this situation.
He walked towards you, kneeling on the ground next to you.
"I'm giving you one chance to explain yourself for that night."
That was all he needed to go on tangent about that night, from the call from MC where she was crying to going to her house and finding out she had been lying to him to get him to spend more time with her instead of you to him and MC having a falling out because of the things she said about you.
He laid it all out, he wasn't proud of the fact that he was so easily fooled by her. He had known her far longer than he had known you, and thought she would never lie to him, boy was he wrong.
"I admit that I have absolutely no excuse for letting myself believe her words. I can't forgive myself for the things I said that night and how I just left you there. It was all my fault."
He took your hands in his, you would've pulled them out of his reach but this time you let him hold them. You could see in his actions and in his eyes how much he regretted that night and how he had been trying everyday to make things right.
"I blame myself for your accident, if I had just stayed with you, if i had never said those words you wouldn't have ended up in this condition."
You had never really seen Caleb cry, so seeing him now in tears as his brain recounted the feeling of seeing you on that hospital bed, had your mind coming to a conclusion.
You were going to give him another chance, his one and only chance. If anything like that happens again you won't stick around, you had enough self respect to not tolerate that.
You removed yours hands from his, Caleb had a look of hurt when you did that, but it didn't last long before you cupped his face, wiping away his tears.
"You get one chance only. Mess up and you'll never see or hear from me again, got it?"
He nodded his head like a child before pulling you to the floor and onto his lap.
He hid his face in the crook of your neck as silent sobs raked his body. You ran a soothing hand through his hair to help him calm down.
It hurt to see him like this, but he also deserved it. Even if it was a fraction of the pain you went through.
"I promise I'll make it up to you. Anything you want, I'll do it."
His voice came out muffled, but you could feel the sincerity in it.
"I'll hold you to that."
460 notes · View notes
mochatsin · 11 months ago
Text
When MC Gets Pushed Off the Stairs
You can be the kindest person or the biggest brat this exchange program has ever seen, but it won’t erase the fact that you have enemies. Some demons just can’t stand the idea of a human earning the favor of the seven avatars… and there are others that plan on doing something about it.
TW: implied bullying, falling down the stairs, sprained ankle + MC in a cast, violence, demon brothers being a bit more sinister.
I was in the mood for a bunch of dark and spiteful demons. I might make a separate part of them taking care of MC during the times they have a cast.
------------
“Who do they think they are? They probably feel invincible when they have those brothers stuck to their hip.” 
You tried ignoring the rumors and whispers, you knew it wasn’t true so there wasn't any reason for you to bring this up with anyone. Though there were a bunch of demons, specifically these two girls, that are quite irritating. They definitely knew you could hear them, but that doesn’t mean they’ll lower their voices whenever they start talking about you. Seeing your discomfort is what even encourages them to keep talking, and you’re walking down the stairs to your next class so you can avoid them because there’s no way you’re gonna give them that satisfaction of seeing how bothered you are. 
“Invincible? As if! They’re just a human.” The other mocks, looking at you with disgust.
“Let’s find out.” Is the last thing you hear before you feel someone’s heel push your back, making you lose your balance and fall over. It was a blur after that, until he came by…
------------
Lucifer
Students are crowding the stairwell, and Lucifer can feel the annoyance already blooming. A crowd like this usually means trouble, and he wonders if Mammon is trying to place bets in secret again. It won’t be the first time he catches his brother discreetly collecting gambling money after convincing other students to bet on something stupid, so Lucifer isn’t going to be surprised if his initial thought was right as he pushes through to see the commotion. 
That’s when Lucifer desperately wished he was right as soon as he saw you on the ground. Two demons on top of the stairs laughed and mocked you, but the moment Lucifer stepped in the scene they immediately shut their mouths out of fear and so did the crowd of students around you. He can piece the scene together and understand what happened, but he needs to hear from you first. 
He kneels down to your level to check up on you. You’re not unconscious and that’s great, though you seemed pretty shaken up. Falling down the stairs and having several students stare at you wasn’t pleasant after all. “Come, let’s discuss what happened in the student council room.” Lucifer offers, since the last thing you need is to be the center of attention and he knows it won’t be a good idea to let you stay here longer.
He helps you stand, but you stumble and cling onto him for support. Your foot… it hurts so much that putting pressure on it sent jolts of burning pain that almost made you scream. You’re trying to be strong despite the pain, you can’t show weakness in front of Lucifer who’s relying on you to represent humans. What kind of image are you showing them? That you’re fragile and weak? It’s all getting overwhelming and Lucifer can see you’re already at your limit.
He turns to the two demons on the top of the stairs and glares at them. The temperature drastically dropped, breathing felt so heavy all of a sudden, and there’s this feeling of dread that paralyzed not only the two but also everyone around them. Trying to run away wasn’t an option, the two girls knew it would just make things worse for them. 
“I expect to see the both of you in the council room at the end of the day. Or else.” There’s no negotiations, and opening their mouths to protest is already a defiance to Lucifer’s orders. He’s already quite strict on his brothers, what more to a pair of demons that doesn’t seem to understand that there are consequences to their actions? “Everyone, get back to your classes.” 
Once everyone has finally left you both alone, Lucifer carries you in his arms. There’s no way he’s letting you limp to the infirmary in this state. He checks your ankle and sighs when he realizes it’s sprained. You thought at first that he’s stressed because you getting hurt meant more work for him, but the worried look on his face shows that it’s not about that.
You’ve been so strong for doing so much here like helping Lucifer manage all of his brothers while still doing your duties as a student, trying to keep up a good impression enough for Diavolo’s exchange program. Now seeing you hurt with a swollen ankle is making Lucifer rethink his views. It’s not pity that’s written on his face, it's… something else entirely. 
“I don’t think you’re weak at all… but maybe it’s time that we take care of you, little lamb.” Lucifer says. It’s an understatement to say that you’re dependable because you’re much more than that to him. He wonders how he even managed to get by with his brothers before you came into their lives. You’ve been so reliable, Lucifer almost forgets that you’re also fragile. You’ve done too much, you deserve a break and be pampered. It’s exactly what he does now that you’ve got a cast on your foot. 
Lucifer doesn’t like seeing you with those crutches, it doesn’t sit right with him when someone like you is suffering from something as basic as going up the stairs. He starts making a proposal about making RAD more accessible for students by adding elevators or magical levitating platforms. While it’s a good idea on its own, you can tell that they had this plan so that you don’t have to suffer through the stairs anymore. Everyone else immediately agreed to the proposal without second thought. 
Lucifer had the two demons apologize to you, and he doesn’t care whether they bruise their skin or get covered in dirt, they will be doing it properly. To beg on their hands and knees, bowing down until their foreheads touch the floor. He won’t let them up until they actually feel genuinely sorry, he doesn’t care how many students will be staring at their pathetic displays. He’s almost tempted to dig his heels into the back of their skulls should they lift their heads for even a single inch from the ground. 
He’ll chip away at their pride that led them to hurting you, finding a way to humiliate them in every subtle way until they’re the ones cowering their head. Lucifer would make subtle comments each time their paths would cross, always looking for a single flow that he would call them out for under the pretense of how it’s unbefitting as a student of RAD. It’s so harsh that the brothers almost felt sorry for them. Is it petty? Perhaps it is. But he doesn’t feel guilty at all when they actively chose to hurt you, and maybe he’ll stop once your ankle is all better.
Mammon
You two were together but then he said had somewhere he needed to be. Mammon was supposed to meet up with you before classes, he just needs to talk to some people he owed a few grimm to and possibly ask for another deadline extension. He’s turning to every corner trying to make sure Lucifer won’t spot him counting his debt, though he did notice the crowd that was forming a few meters away. 
He didn’t give it much thought at first, but that’s until he heard the whispers of students walking towards the scene. ‘It’s that human exchange that fell’ ‘fell? They were pushed, weren't they?’ And that’s when Mammon starts to sprint, honestly hoping that it was Solomon and not you that they were talking about. 
“Outta the way dammit!” Is all you hear, with a few grunts from students getting forcibly shoved to the side before Mammon finally finds you on the floor clutching your ankle. He squats next to you to check the damage, and you can tell from the expression on his face that it doesn’t look good at all. 
He looks up at the stairs and sees the two demons snickering at each other before running away from the scene. Mammon recognizes them, he’s heard some of the nasty stuff they’ve said about this exchange program, and especially about you. It just never occurred to him that they’d do something this drastic when given the chance. Mammon was gone for ten minutes and that was enough time to hurt you. 
He wanted to run after them, force the two to apologize to you. To make them pay. Though the wince and cries from you are what makes Mammon think with a clear head. You tell him that your ankle is hurting, you can’t move it as much without any pain. So he carries you and makes a run for it to the infirmary. No ambulance compares to how quickly Mammon ran just to get you some help.
Mammon stays by your side, too afraid to leave you for another second after what happened. He stares as they patch up your ankle and you’ll be in crutches until it heals. He’s mad, but definitely not at you. He’s angry that this happened under his watch when he’s supposed to be making sure you’re safe from demons like those. That was a role entrusted to him and he already feels like he failed.
“Ya aint leavin’ my sight, not until that ankle of yours is back in shape aight?” And he meant every word. If he’s not glued to your hip, then you swear you can see a three-eyed crow that’s following you around wherever you go. You just feed it some snacks if you have some when you can, and you wake up with shiny trinkets by your desk the next day.
Mammon is ready to be at your beck and call anytime you need it. You let out a grunt of frustration if you dropped your bag and spilled all your belongings. Your sprained ankle makes it hard for you to bend over to get them, but the moment you turn your head, Mammon is already at your feet grabbing you everything. If it weren’t for the circumstances (like your injury), Belphie would probably exploit this and make his older brother do everything while pretending you asked for it. 
The two girls have noticed how much those crows have been following them around. Crows can hold grudges, and they definitely recognize the demons that hurt the human they (and their master) care about. 
It started off as something harmless as landing on their desks, squawking at them, or stealing their pens before an important exam. Though when Mammon noticed them occasionally mocking you behind your back for that cast once you came back to RAD, the crows became more aggressive. The birds pulled on their hair, pecked and bit on their skin, clawing at them whenever they could.
Desperate for this madness to stop, the demons are already by Mammon’s feet begging for the crows to leave them alone. Personally, Mammon would’ve done something much worse but there was no way he’s going to abandon you for a second with that cast. “I’m feeling quite generous, so if ya hear me out on my conditions i’ll let you off the hook yeah?” 
In exchange for finally getting some peace from those crows, the demons agreed to two conditions. One, never to lay a hand on you ever again unless they want the risk of the birds invading their homes. No more mocking or even looking at you with malice. Two, pay Mammon every month. By the time that you got that cast removed, Mammon has paid off some debt from his classmates and he’s quite proud of it. At least he could take care of you and save some coin at the time. No one said it had to be his money right?
Levi
Levi didn’t spend lunch with any of his brothers or classmates as usual today. He likes spending his free time alone in isolated places like the school garden, empty classrooms, or even the rooftop so he could play his games or watch his anime in peace. Socializing with too many people is overwhelming, this is his own way of recharging to get through the rest of the day. 
Though there are rare instances that Levi would ask you to join him in his little hideouts, because you’re one of the people he doesn’t feel too draining to be around. He planned to share some of the snacks he bought for the both of you, but he saw that you were talking with his other brothers at the cafeteria. Feeling dejected, he decided to spend the lunch alone as usual and wait for the class. There’s no way you would want to spend time with someone who’d rather play gacha games on his phone for lunch…
He was hiding by the corners of the stairwell to play his game when he overheard two demons talking so badly about you, followed by hurried footsteps and then a heavy thump at the end of the stairs. Then he heard a familiar voice cry out in pain, and it’s when he realized that you were pushed off the stairs. He saw your body on the floor, trying to recover from the fall and he felt like his world was crashing in on him. He’s frozen in place, unsure of what to do without making things worse.
You turned around and found him hiding behind the stairwell, eyes locked for a moment that felt like an eternity to the demon. That’s when Levi realized he can’t just stand there idly when his player two is injured. Despite the anxiety, he ran to your side anyway to check on you. His face went so pale when he saw you clenching your ankle, the pain evident in your expression. “I-i’ve got you just… dammit what do i d-do…?!” He mumbles the last part, because he knows this isn’t a game where it takes one button to heal you back. No saved file to help him now. 
Levi looks up at the stairs and sees the two demons glaring at the both of you. Out of all the brothers, they would never take Levi seriously. To them, he’s just some demon who dedicated his life to a world of fiction and seeing him fumble right now just proves it. They say that Levi just lacks any real skill to even help you before they left. 
He hates to admit that those two are right, and that makes him loathe himself even more. Levi almost went down on a spiral, but that’s until he felt a phone get placed on his hand. He turns to meet your gaze, you handed him his D.D.D. and he knew what you were asking him to do. Levi quickly dials for his brothers and help came to you after a minute of doing so. He’s thankful for their quick responses, he wouldn’t be able to handle it if a crowd started forming around you both. 
Everyone of them was huddled outside the infirmary while you were getting patched up, and Levi explained what he witnessed. Though he starts going into his self-destructive speech patterns at how he could hardly do anything to help you by himself that he needed to get his brothers to do it for him. He felt so useless to you, but Lucifer interjects. “It’s natural to panic. But if you did not call for us, then they would’ve been in pain for much longer.”
That helped Levi feel a little bit grounded hearing reassurances from his brothers. Lucifer then tasked Levi to be the one in charge of taking care of you during school days. Since Levi also takes his classes online, then he can watch over you while you’re resting in the house. You both can take online classes together while you recover from your injury.
Levi spends most of the time in your room instead because there’s no way he’s making you go up those stairs to his room, and he doesn’t want to risk you getting hurt or slipping if you try to get in his bathtub. As clumsy as he could be, Levi did his best to take care of you. He did want to spend some time alone with you, but he wished it didn’t take a sprained ankle to get what he wanted. 
“I-if only this healing item exists, it would’ve been really handy right now…” He says as you both play a two-player game, the demon staring longingly at the recovery potions on the screen and wishing it could take away your pain right now. Levi often wonders… maybe if he didn’t sulk from the jealousy, if he actually asked you that day to go spend lunch with him, then maybe you wouldn’t have gotten hurt like this. 
Levi was watching some anime while you slept, and he saw the bullies on the anime picking on the innocent main protagonist. The scene just reminds him of what happened to you, and that brings him this sense of rage and justice. It was unfair what those two girls did to you, and Levi doesn’t think it’s right that he does nothing about this (assuming that his brothers haven't gotten to them first). 
The girls found all their accounts hacked. From Devilgram to their bank accounts. Their emails and passwords were changed overnight so they couldn’t figure out how to get it back, and if by some miracle they recovered their accounts, everything was already wiped clean by then. Levi may not be the most confrontational brother, but he’s the best behind the screen. He’s chugging his third energy drink as he thinks of new ways to plant a virus in their D.D.D.’s when he goes to school at the end of the week to hand over both of your homeworks. 
When Levi overheard the girls still talking about you during break, they found all their stuff completely drenched and ruined by the time they came back to their seats even though the classroom remained dry. Gadgets were water damaged, and schoolwork that they were supposed to be submitting later is already long gone. Even their lockers were stuffed with sand and sea water, spilling all over their uniforms as soon as they opened it. The teachers scolded them for the mess they ‘created’ no matter the protests that they never did, but who would believe them if they said it was Levi’s doing? The girls never uttered your name again.
Satan
The teacher assigned you both as partners for a class project due next week, and Satan suggested that it’s best to get a head start on it while your schedules are free. You babysit all of his brothers every day, so Satan expects that your days are going to be quite busy if any of them knew you had a bit of free time to spare. At least his plans are something productive, he gets to spend time with you while also finishing some homework together. 
It’s ten minutes past the agreed time you both were supposed to meet. Satan is outside the school library, tapping his foot on the floor as he messaged you but receiving no response. He knows he could’ve gone ahead to do some research to pass the time, but the point of this study date was to do the project together. It’s never like you to be late without any notice, so he sets out to look for you. 
Satan is walking swiftly, wondering if you were still at the cafeteria. He dials your number to try to call you during his search, and he stops in his tracks when finds your phone on the ground, the screen cracked. It brought alarms in his head and he picked it up to figure out where you must’ve dropped it. It wasn’t hard because he soon spotted the crowd of demons by the stairway nearby. He could immediately guess what happened as he ran to the crowd, and he’s shocked when finally sees that you were the source of commotion.
He doesn’t care how many students he shoved just to get to your side. Seeing you on the ground in pain already warrants an emergency. Satan guessed your phone flew out of your hand when you fell. “What happened to you?! Where does it hurt?!” Satan asks, pulling you close in his arms and checking what’s causing you pain. He sees your ankle swelling slightly, and he’s trying to deduce what he can do to help after reading all of those human health care books just for you.
Though the laughter he’s hearing from the distance is annoying and distracting. Satan glances up and spots the two girls fleeing the scene, looking so proud of themselves. When he realizes what happened to you, his anger is already bubbling through the surface that it’s almost hard to contain. The pained expression on your face doesn’t help, the only reason he hasn’t fully transformed into his demon form is that he doesn’t want to draw more attention or hurt you more than you already are.
The way these students crowded around you like vultures to a feast is making Satan frustrated at each and everyone of them. How could they just stand there and watch while you were in pain? And those two girls, he will make sure to burn their faces into his memory for later. You could practically feel the heat of his wrath radiating from your pact and it’s making your body hurt more. Satan realized that his temper right now could be causing you more pain, so he focuses his thoughts into getting you some help instead of the anger that wants to burn everything and everyone around you.
“Calm down… just calm down…” he mutters over and over while he gently scoops you into his arms, though it sounds more like he’s trying to convince himself. Satan is careful when carrying you so he can take you to the infirmary, and all the students parted like the red sea when Satan shot glares at them, quickly scattering like rats while the two of you disappeared into the infirmary. 
His eyebrows are furrowed the entire time as he waits for you to get patched up. His brothers have already arrived after they heard what happened, though they could sense that the fourth born is already on edge like a ticking time bomb. He’s quiet not because there’s nothing to say, but because he’s trying to hatch a plan. Something like this shouldnt go unpunished…
Satan is glad for his position in the student council because it meant that he could access some files from RAD. What does he do best? Studying and gathering as much information as he could. He looks for any detention notices until he finds the names and faces of the two girls that hurt you. A smile spreads across his face, though it was nothing pleasant. Like he just found his new prey. 
He just needs to wait for that detention day, patience is the key to success. So for now he’ll focus on taking care of you. Satan pays more attention to you, always attentive to your needs. He brings you notes from any classes that you’ve missed during your recovery, and you heard from one of the brothers that they’re all trying to rack up money for a better phone since yours broke. you do admit that you feel bad for all the extra work he puts up for your sake, especially since Satan even had to do most of the project that you both were originally supposed to do together in the first place if it weren’t for the incident.
“You’re speaking nonsense. I don’t mind putting in more effort just for you, all you need to do is to recover. I’ll consider that as my thanks.” Satan would bring you books in bed or make you some coffee topped with some latte art just so you wouldn’t feel so bored. You can’t go to cafes or libraries with him like you both used to, so Satan will do everything with you in the comforts of your room. 
Satan counted the days until it was time. He assigns another brother to watch over you. Asmo pretends not to hear the sound of the main door closing in the middle of the night, distracting you with something pretty he recently bought. The next school day rolls around and everyone is lucky you’re still in bed rest when the news broke out. Two students were found unconscious on the stairs in an awful state. Normally, falling down a flight of stairs doesn’t do much damage to a demon as much as it can to humans. And yet the bones in their legs were absolutely shattered…
None of the brothers were honestly too bothered to tell you the events that transpired, mostly because they knew the culprit. Satan would rather that you focus your energy on recovering. The only news that Satan told you was that you both got a perfect mark on the project you both worked on in the comforts of your room, but he doesn’t bring up what happened to those two demons. You only found out when Solomon accidentally told you during his visits. 
Asmo
There’s only a few minutes left before the next bell would ring, so Asmo makes sure to retouch his makeup in the school’s bathroom just as he usually does. He dedicates twenty minutes of his daily time making sure that he looks absolutely perfect, so he could bless the eyes of those who pass by to bear witness of his beauty. At least, that’s what he always tells you whenever he leaves. 
Just a bit of blush here and there to match his eye shadow, and Asmo has this proud smile on his face when he’s sure that he looks absolutely spotless. He wanted to bring you along to his little pre-class make up routines, and maybe next time he’ll hear that sweet ‘yes’ from you when he asks. Just thinking about you is making him giddy, so Asmo packed up his pouch and tried to look for you.
It didn’t take him long because as soon as he opened the bathroom door, he spotted a few students by the stairs. Asmo finds it unusual because what could be so important that he’s not the center of attention? Regardless, he’s intrigued enough to investigate the source and he’s horrified to see you down the stairs, clutching your ankle. 
If it wasn’t you, then it was Asmo’s shriek that probably drew more attention to the scene. He’s quickly running to your side and checks if you hit your pretty little face anywhere. “Darling, that must’ve been a nasty fall! I would hate it if you got any bruises anywhere on that perfect skin of yours.” Asmo whines as he helps you sit up to give you more support, wrapping an arm around your waist. 
When he did so, he heard a scoff and finally turned his attention to the top of the stairs where the two girls looked at you with disgust. He recognizes one of them from his fanclubs, a girl that often tried to get his attention. The facial expressions and body language says all he needs to know, he’s seen this look before. Someone like you being held by Asmo is a major offense to her eyes. The two demons storm off before Asmo could say anything. 
Asmo pursed his lips together in frustration before he turned to all the students crowding around you. For once, he hated this attention you’re getting and he sees how much you’re getting shaken by this. “Scram.” Asmo said with enchanted glowing eyes, watching as they all obeyed his command. He then turns to you and wraps your arm over his shoulder to hoist you up. “Come on, let’s get that treated or Lucifer will kill me!” Asmo says to try lighten the mood, though it doesn’t hide the bloodlust in his eyes. 
He doesn’t like sweating when he just retouched his makeup, but he can’t even bring himself to think about that now whenever he hears the pained whimpers from you everytime you struggle to take a step. The brother’s eventually arrive to find Asmo outside the Infirmary, scrolling through his phone. Looking closely, he’s actually stalking the profile of the demon he saw earlier and there’s a sinister smile on his face whenever he learns something new about his target. The smile was enough to creep Levi out. 
Asmo is always checking up on you when you’re at home recovering, trying to cheer you up whenever he has the chance. It’s gotten to the point he lessened his time clubbing or going to malls just so he could stay with you. “When you’re out of that cast, there will be a special bath full of rose petals with your name written all over it.” Asmo does his best to pamper you whenever he can, knowing how hard it must be to have that cast. It’s truly awful when these sorts of things have to happen to you when you both just bought some matching shoes together! He decides not to wear it yet until your foot gets better.
While you were gone, Asmo did what does best. Gossip. He started giving that other demon attention like she always wanted, whispering and suggesting things in her ear. About how that other demon, her friend, was saying disgusting things behind her back and Asmo is only telling her this to ‘look out’ for her sake. He relishes in her angered expression, knowing he now has her wrapped around his finger like a puppet and all he needed to do was sit back to watch the show.
Each day he found himself feeling excited to go to school just to see how those two would hurt each other this time. It started as something petty with his fan constantly bumping into what she used to consider as a friend, feigning ignorance whenever she’s confronted. Of course, she retaliated back until their silent arguments full of passive-aggressiveness turned into something more violent and hostile. It started from mean notes to death threats until they can’t even stand being in the same room without trying to claw out each other’s eyes. All because of Asmo’s pretty words.
There are times teachers are called to intervene because two girls began fighting in the hallways, screaming profanities while pulling at the other’s hair or horns. Whenever the drama dies down, Asmo would go back to add more fuel to the fire just to watch them burn. He tells his dedicated fan more lies just to enable that rage, spreading a rumor or two around the campus to make it sound reliable. He loves having that charm that captivates and charms, especially someone as gullible as this demon who’d listen to anything he says.
News was no longer about your recent incident, it was now about how the two demons fought so badly that they fell over the stair railings from the top floor all the way down. Given the severity of the injuries they’ve given each other from the week alone, they had no choice but to be suspended until the student council decides what to do with them. 
Of course, the brothers knew Asmo pulled the strings, seeing that smile on his face whenever the two girls would try to tear each other apart made it so obvious. Not only was it easy and entertaining, but it kept his nails clean too. It’s not like he broke a rule right? They both did this to themselves. “I can’t wait to tell my darling what happened~!” Asmo hums excitedly on his way home to you.
Beel
Lunch time is definitely Beel’s favorite part of the day (and the lunch lady's worst nightmare). He’s golfing down as much food as he could since he’s been so hungry from his last class which was Magical Potions. Whenever his hunger starts to act up, it’s already a struggle not to eat the ingredients to alleviate it, knowing his teacher would scold him just like last time when he chowed down the entire jar of shadow salamander tails. 
He’s lucky whenever you both are paired up together, since you bring him some candies to alleviate his hunger enough for him to focus again. You were his lifesaver. Just the thought of you makes Beel wonder where you were. He went ahead today because you said you needed to see Satan to discuss a project, and you were taking quite a while. He’s had food saved up for you and it’s getting harder for Beel not to eat your share, plus it’s always better when you both eat together. 
The last straw was when he saw Satan in the cafeteria and when he asked the blonde where you were, the fourth born said he couldn’t find you. Beel grabs a few snacks to keep his stomach going when he searches for you. Normally it’s hard to convince Beel to leave the cafeteria during lunch break, but you’re that important for him to abandon the heaping food on his table. He was trained as an angel to be ready for any sort of disaster, and his gut is telling him that something is definitely wrong. He only confirmed it when he was walking down the stairs and saw everything. 
Two girls were laughing and mocking the human he’s grown to love and care for, and when he found you on the bottom of the stairs after a fall, Beel was seeing red. He doesn’t hesitate to slam his fist against the wall and demand silence, because there was no way he was going to let them insult you any further. The two demons saw him and stiffened, quickly running away from the scene to avoid getting caught. The girls knew that Beel would crack their skulls open like he did to that wall if he got his hands on them.
Beel normally would’ve gone after them, but seeing how you’re struggling to get up on your own is what changed his mind and ran to you instead. He doesn’t even get to run all the way, at some point Beel jumps down the last flight of stairs just to reach you quicker. “Tell me if it hurts…” Beel whispers as he tries to help you up. You winced from the pain, and he decided to effortlessly carry you all the way to the infirmary because he would never make you limp this entire trip and deal with the ache. He’s a big demon, and lots of people find him terrifying when aggravated. And yet he’s so gentle when it comes to you.
Being a fangol player, Beel knows what it’s like to hurt yourself. He’s had Lucifer and Mammon help him back to the house after one intense match against the opposing team. The difference is that he could heal a bit more quickly compared to your fragile human body. What normally takes days for his body to regenerate could last months for you. He’s being careful when he carries you to the infirmary, holding you close like you’re the most delicate thing he’s ever held and he might be right at this point when he watches the nurses patch you up.
Beel is pacing so much outside the infirmary that his twin had to calm him down before he would drill a hole in the middle of the halls, his head is thinking about all of the what-ifs. Luckily you weren’t critical, save for the sprained ankle, but there’s this guilt on his face when he looks through the window and sees your cast. Maybe he should’ve been with you when you went looking for Satan so that he would have protected you, but what’s done is done now. So he focuses on taking care of you and reminding you that you could always rely on him for help.
He brings you some of your favorite treats whenever he comes home from RAD so you both could eat together. At some point, he heard from Solomon that milk is the key for humans to have stronger bones. You tried not to laugh when Beel got a galon just for you, innocently thinking that it would’ve helped you out with your injury if you drank all of it. 
Beel is too nice for a demon, he might be the kindest of the seven brothers. But there’s been this tension around the orange haired demon whenever he’s sharing a class with the two girls that pushed you down those stairs. There's this hardly contained rage and blood lust, so a lot of students avoided mentioning what happened to you around him unless they want to get caught in the crossfire. 
Beel finds it frustrating whenever he feels that he can't do anything about this rage. Watching you limp around in crutches around the house while those girls were striding down the halls without a care, it wasn't fair. It’s taking all his willpower not to just throw them out of the window for what they did to you. He broke several pens whenever he's too angry during class that Satan had to lend him some of his own. He feels this loss of appetite now that you’re not around to share food with him, and whenever he would remember the incident he would bend the metal of his fork, shaping it effortlessly like it’s clay. It’s a matter of concern for the brothers now.
Belphie took his twin out to the gym so Beel could let his frustrations through workouts. He may have destroyed two punching bags, but it was enough to bring down that anger to a safer level now. And during all that, Beel finally confided in his twin. About how he saw those girls mock you, and this innate urge to just see them suffer but it’s impossible to do that without destroying everything in his path. He would get in a lot of trouble, and he knows that would upset you instead. 
“It’s just unfair, you know that they didn’t deserve that…” Just because he was nice doesn’t mean he wasn’t vengeful, but he’s at a loss of what he could do that wouldn’t result in another property damage bill sitting on Lucifer’s desk. Belphie can just sense how his Beel is itching for a bit of revenge, and who is he to deny what his twin wants? 
For Magical Potions, Beel had to partner up with Satan and Belphie since you’ll be absent for the time being. They had the perfect plan, all Satan needed was a good sleight of hand to drop something in their cauldron when he walks by. Given that these two love pulling pranks on Lucifer specifically, they took a page out of their book of schemes for new targets. 
Maybe his brothers forgot to consider that these two demons do not have the same kind of strength or resistance that the eldest had… or they both did this on purpose. Adding hellfire frog legs into the girl’s cauldron during Magical Potions class was actually more explosive than they expected, resulting in awful burns on their skin and hair. Beel’s priority is to take care of you everyday so he didn’t have much time to relish in this side of his that wants to wreak havoc, but he admits that seeing your bullies in pain like this is actually fun. It’s almost as satisfying as those ten stack pancakes he had two days ago… ah great, now he’s getting hungry again.
Beel is coming home to you with a box of your favorite treats. You wanted to try those new batch of sweets from Madame Scream but the brothers kept you in bed rest due to your ankle, so Beel went out of the trouble to get them for you. It took a lot of willpower not to eat a single one on the way back which deserves praise. You’ve been feeding him so many snacks during class to help him focus, this is his way of returning the favor to you. 
He doesn’t bring up what happened during potions class with the girls that pushed you, and he honestly didn’t feel the need to do so since they weren’t important as you are to him. He’s too busy trying to feed you some yummy snacks to even think about that. You only hear about what happened through his twin who was grinning from ear to ear when he recalls the boils and burnt hair. “Well, it’s their fault for not checking their cauldron. They’re not smart and careful like you.” 
Belphie
Belphie found a perfect spot to sleep around RAD where he’s sure Lucifer won’t spot him yet. It’s hidden in the school gardens, a nice secluded area with a small bench surrounded by bushes that would surely keep him out of sight. He’s been slowly putting pillows and blankets he’s brought so that it becomes a little slumber haven for him, and Belphie feels that he’s ready to show you his secret spot. He’d never tell his brothers because he wants to have at least a few minutes alone with you every weekday.
The problem with that plan is that Belphie can’t even find you. He’s already at the verge of passing out from the exhaustion of trying to keep himself awake in his search for you. Lunch in school is normally his nap time allowance, but he really did want to show you this secret hide out so that you both could enjoy it together. 
He runs into his twin who was also looking for you, so it’s better they just stuck together right? Belphie had plans to show Beel anyways once this was done with. They passed by a corner to go upstairs in case you were already in the classroom, and that’s when they both saw you at the bottom of the stairs where those two girls were laughing at you. 
Belphie didn’t know what came over him, but his body could hardly move when he saw you like that. It’s bringing him a lot of bad memories of choices he came to regret until this day, remembering the things he did to you when he threw your body down the stairs. He wanted to forget that, but seeing this whole situation is making that memory repeat in his head. Like the guilt is creeping back to him, and he froze in place not knowing what to do other than to relive the moment. 
Beel grabbed Belphie by the wrist to snap him out of the trance, reminding the youngest that you need some help. The twins came by your side, hoisting your arms over their shoulders to help you in the infirmary. The two girls were already long gone while Belphie was in a frozen state, and Beel would’ve gone after them if not for his twin and you because his family always comes first. 
The one thing that’s comforting Belphie right now is the fact that you’re still alive and breathing, though it can only do so much. He doesn’t like seeing you in pain like this, so he offers a spell so you could sleep through it while the nurse from the infirmary patches you up. He’s quiet the entire time when he watches you rest, Beel tries to talk to his twin about it but he refuses to let his problems known. It’s not like it was hard to guess, Beel can tell what’s bothering his twin but doesn’t mention it. 
Belphie has been taking naps by your side whenever possible, sleeping in your room and making sure to give you sweet dreams each time you start falling asleep. Though he himself couldn’t sleep. Each time he tries to get some shut eye with you, he ends up reliving that day when they found you at the bottom of the stairs. The way those girls mocked you was unforgivable, and he hates how it’s hitting too close to home. Whenever he wakes up, he checks on your pulse while you’re asleep and sighs in relief every time he feels your heart beat. Like it’s the only thing that can calm him down. 
By the time he woke up from his third nightmare, Belphie had enough. If he wants to feel at peace again, then he needs to get rid of the source of the problem. It wasn’t fair that you’re suffering like this, he hates seeing the empty seat next to him in class knowing that you’re supposed to be there instead of staying at home with that cast. Lucifer told him that they’ll be dealing with the matters soon, but Belphie had no intention of listening to them in the first place. 
Belphie has been gradually giving the two girls nightmares, and each night they progressively get worse. From using their phobias against them to waking up from a gorefest nightmare in the middle of the night. It costs them sleep, and Belphie thinks it’s the perfect piece of karma whenever he sees the bags under their eyes getting darker each day. Hair and clothes started to look more haphazard when there’s barely any energy to keep themselves up.
Whenever Belphie shares a class with them, he pulls a little bit of magic to make them fall asleep during class until they get into a lot of trouble. He loves doing this when there are important tests and activities so they’d miss it and fail. No amount of coffee helps keep them awake during the day while the nightmares plague their sleep. The constant fatigue and the lack of sleep is starting to get to them, and Belphie has been observing everything. Movements were more sluggish and alertness has gone below the baseline. Just exactly what Belphie was waiting for. 
It’s a simple plan that leads to the least amount of struggling and effort needed, because all it took was one shove for them to tumble out of the railings and down several flights of stairs. When they’ve finally stopped rolling against the stairs, they hear Belphie’s heavy footsteps as he walks down to their level until he’s stepping on one of them with the heel of his foot. He’d compare them to bugs, but that would be insulting to all insects.
“You know, I had a lot of plans with them that day… I don’t like it when people, even my brothers, decide to ruin them.” His love for you and spoiled attitude is what’s fueling his anger right now, so he had no qualms with pushing them down the next flight of stairs with his foot. And whenever they think it’s over, he goes down and does this again. Like kicking a pebble he’s found on the ground… all the way down to the first floor. 
There’s this satisfied look on his face as soon as he sees the two girls on the floor already at the brink of unconsciousness. He feels so much lighter now, and all he can think of is how he wants to go home to take a nap with you. He doesn’t even walk over to the side, he just steps over the two girls on his way out. 
Belphie comes home with the usual drowsy expression, but you can tell he’s in a much better mood now. He lays down next to you in bed, already hugging you close to his chest while making sure he’s not hurting your ankle. “I think I can get more sleep now…” he says with a confident smile on his lips, lulling you to slumber with him. After that incident, it’s the first in a while that Belphie finally has his usual 10 hour nap. 
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solxamber · 7 months ago
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Hi!! I would like to request somn! (Twst)
I've been thinking, since early in the story the ramshackle dorm is rundown and old and basically abandoned
so what if MC/Yuu tried to sleep on their bed but ofc since its old it just breaks and hurts their back
so may i request to see if Ruggie, Azul and Idia (separated) would let MC/Yuu sleep with them on their bed? (romantic btw)
(or they can let them sleep on the FLOOR-)
Sharing a bed with Ruggie, Azul, Idia
I wanted to make them sleep on the floor just for giggles but I love the single bed trope too much to let it go. thanks for the request <3
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You’d think after everything that had happened to you—being thrown into some magic-filled hellscape, dealing with literal monsters and chaotic students—that the universe would cut you a little slack. But no, apparently, even when you’re just trying to go to bed, Ramshackle Dorm has other plans.
You had just flopped onto your ancient, creaky bed, exhausted from a day of not dying, when—CRACK.
The bedframe split right down the middle, sending you crashing to the floor with the most undignified yelp you’d ever made. You lay there for a moment, staring at the ceiling, trying to figure out how the universe hated you this much.
“Well. That’s just great,” you muttered to yourself, rubbing your sore back. You tried to push the mattress back into place, but it was hopeless. The bed was dead. There was no fixing it tonight.
Which left you with only one option: find someone to share a bed with.
Ruggie Bucchi
You trudged to Ruggie’s dorm room, knocking on the door with the energy of someone who had been emotionally crushed along with their bed. The door creaked open to reveal Ruggie’s grinning face.
“Eh? What’re you doin’ here at this hour, huh?”
“My bed broke,” you deadpanned. “I need somewhere to crash.”
Ruggie blinked, then snorted. “The ghost bed finally gave up, huh? Figures.”
You rolled your eyes, but couldn’t deny he had a point. “Can I sleep here or not?”
Ruggie grinned wider, obviously enjoying your misery. “Yeah, sure, come on in. But don’t expect me to give up the whole bed. I ain’t got much space.”
“Fine,” you sighed, “I’ll take a corner. Just… let me sleep.”
You climbed into his surprisingly cozy bed, and he made a big show of sprawling out, starfish-style, as if trying to take up every inch of space. “Comfy, huh?”
“Very,” you muttered sarcastically, but as you shifted to find a spot, you felt the warmth of his body near yours.
Somehow, as you drifted off to sleep, you both ended up gravitating closer, until you woke up in the middle of the night, realizing your head was resting on his chest.
Your eyes flew open, and you froze, realizing that you were completely snuggled up against him. And worse? He didn’t seem to mind. In fact, his arm was draped around you, holding you close.
You blinked, heart racing. This was... actually kind of nice?
Ruggie stirred, blinking down at you with a sleepy grin. “Well, well. Cuddle monster, are ya?”
You wanted to die of embarrassment. “I didn’t—You—The bed—”
He just laughed softly. “Relax. Not so bad, huh?”
You hesitated, then sighed. “I guess not.”
“See? I’m always right.” He grinned, then gave you a gentle squeeze. “Now, go back to sleep, or I’m charging you rent for hoggin’ my warmth.”
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Azul Ashengrotto
“Azul, I need to sleep in your room,” you announced the second he opened the door to Octavinelle.
Azul blinked, adjusting his glasses. “Excuse me?”
“My bed broke,” you said with all the exhaustion of a person who had given up on life. “And I need a place to sleep.”
Azul stared at you, clearly processing. “And… you’ve come to me? Of all people?”
You sighed, too tired for this. “Floyd’s a maniac, Jade will probably cook something weird at 2 a.m., so yes. I came to you.”
Azul pushed up his glasses, clearly flustered but trying to act composed. “Very well. But I must inform you that my quarters don’t have a spare bed. You will have to share mine.”
You blinked. “Fine. I’m too tired to care.”
Azul looked mildly scandalized, but he stepped aside, letting you in. His room was surprisingly neat, but there was only one bed—one very large, comfortable-looking bed. Without another word, you climbed in.
Azul hesitated for a moment, clearly weighing the pros and cons of sharing a bed with you, but eventually he slid in beside you, keeping a respectable distance.
At least, that was the plan.
You both woke up in the morning tangled in the sheets, Azul’s arm slung over your waist, your head resting on his shoulder.
Azul’s eyes fluttered open, and for a moment, neither of you moved. Then, very slowly, he looked down at you, eyes wide with confusion and panic. “I—this wasn’t—”
You blinked up at him, realizing just how close you were. “Uh… morning?”
Azul turned an alarming shade of red but didn’t move. In fact, his arm tightened just slightly. “This is… highly unprofessional,” he muttered, though he made no effort to pull away.
You snorted. “Yeah, sure. But it’s not so bad.”
Azul blinked at you, his panic melting into a soft, almost shy smile. “No… I suppose not.”
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Idia Shroud
When you knocked on the door to Ignihyde, you half expected Idia to ignore you. But to your surprise, the door cracked open, revealing his glowing yellow eyes.
“What’re you doing here?” he asked, eyes darting around nervously.
“My bed broke,” you said bluntly. “I need a place to crash.”
Idia blinked. “Uh… okay? But I don’t have a guest bed.”
You sighed. “That’s fine. I’ll take the floor.”
Idia looked even more nervous, scratching the back of his head. “Uh, well… it’s just me in here, so I guess you can… share mine?”
You stared at him for a moment, realizing what he was offering. “Sure. Why not.”
Idia nearly short-circuited at your casual response, but he let you in anyway, leading you to his surprisingly large bed. You both climbed in, and Idia immediately plastered himself to the very edge, leaving a wide gap between you.
“Y-you can have more space,” he mumbled, staring intently at the ceiling.
“Thanks,” you said, too tired to worry about the awkwardness. But as you both drifted off, the cold air of the room seemed to pull you closer, until, somewhere in the night, you ended up pressed against Idia’s side.
When you woke up, your head was resting on his chest, his arm slung loosely around you.
Idia’s hair flickered wildly when he realized where he was, his entire face turning bright red. “Wha—how—uh—what are you doing?!”
You groggily blinked up at him. “Sleeping?”
“I—I didn’t mean to—this wasn’t—” Idia was flustered beyond belief, but he made no move to untangle himself from you.
You smirked. “You’re warm. This isn’t so bad, you know.”
Idia blinked at you, his panic fading just a little. “R-really?”
You nodded, settling back against him. “Yeah. Kinda nice, actually.”
Idia’s hair flared bright pink for a moment, but then he relaxed, his arm resting a little more confidently around you. “O-okay. Just… don’t tell anyone.”
You grinned. “Your secret’s safe with me.”
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Masterlist
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blueblossomrose · 5 months ago
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I am absolutely IN LOVE with your twst parents series! The thought of seeing my boys getting their happy endings is so 😭😭😭
Can I please have more of Idia with his son 🥺 (I loved that his name is Orpheus, my heart fan of greek mythology 🙈
Thank you so much for the kind words! 😭 When this series started I expected it to have absolutely no repercussions, so when I saw the number of notes I was like 🤯
Of course, let's have dad Idia <3
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This post is part of the Twisted Parents Series.
Content: fem!afab!mc, post-canon, family relationships, fluffy.
Art not mine.
Comments and reblogs are very welcome ♡
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When MC said she was pregnant, Idia fainted. Yes, his body went straight to the ground, motionless.
MC was like: 😨
When he woke up, it wasn't any easier to deal with the news.
He was scared and nervous above all else. The thought of not being a good dad, or worse, being a bad dad, was eating away at him inside.
After all, how can a damn nerd who works with computers all day like him be a good father? — yeah, he offended his own father by saying that and soon corrected himself.
MC continued to comfort him throughout this time. Of course, he would make mistakes at some point, nobody is perfect. But the important thing was to learn from the mistakes and love the child with all his heart.
He already love this child. He didn't know how to explain the feeling, of how he loves someone who hasn't even been born yet.
He would often talk to MC's belly at night, when she was already asleep. If she ended waking up, he would immediately get up, red with embarrassment, the tips of his hair slightly pink as he stammered an excuse. MC would just laugh and tell him to go back to talking to the baby, which he did after some hesitation.
After he held Orpheus in his arms for the first time, all his fears momentarily disappeared as if by magic.
He looked at MC, and then at Orpheus... and a tear of happiness fell. He never thought he would be allowed to have such happiness... but here he was. Having his happy ending from the fairy tales he read to Ortho when they were children.
He works hard to simply be there for you and the baby. He was like this before you were even pregnant, but the birth of Orpheus made him work even harder for this.
As Orpheus grew up, Idia began to trying teach him one of his hobbies: video games.
"Trying" is the key word. Idia acknowledges that he is not so good at explaining things that come so easily to him. But at least Orpheus seems to understand his father's quick thinking, even at such young age.
Idia soon realized that Orpheus took after his mother as the boy showed more of his personality.
Orpheus is an extroverted child, completely different from Idia, which left him slightly confused but not exactly surprised.
Orpheus definitely takes after Mrs. Shroud, Ortho, and MC's side of the family.
This difference between dad and son often causes comical and adorable scenes.
For example, once in a restaurant, when Idia's order came out wrong and he didn't want to go and change it at the counter. So, a nine-year-old Orpheus took his father's hand and dragged him to the counter, and then he went to the attendant and said:
"Excuse me, sir. My dad's order came out wrong. He asked for no salad. My mom said that dad is introverted, so let me say what he need, please."
Idia was behind, and he didn't know if he was embarrassed, or proud of Orpheus. Possibly both.
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anna-the-undertaker · 8 months ago
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Pick-a-fic prompt:
Newly arrived MC being unable to deal with the Brothers to the point of debating leaving the exchange program and thus running to the relative peace of the castle to step back and reflect (focus on the Royals)
OR
Newly arrived MC being unable to deal with the Brothers to the point of debating leaving the exchange program and thus running to the relative peace of the castle, but the brothers find MC’s diary where their doubts are written as plain as day (focus on the Brothers)
Sorry this took so long to get to, I've just been so busy working, prepping stuff for moving, and I got absorbed in the fic I am working on. I chose the second one and ended up giving it more angst. I hope this is what you were asking for. Enjoy :)
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Failure
MC had never felt so small.
From the moment they arrived in the Devildom, they were an outsider—human, fragile, and completely out of place. The brothers tolerated their presence, but only just. Every day was a new challenge, a struggle to keep their head above water in a world so different from their own.
Mammon, their first pact and appointed guardian, never missed an opportunity to remind them of how much of a burden they were. "Oi, don’t just stand there lookin’ useless. If you’re gonna stick around, at least do somethin’ useful, huh?" He’d toss those words at them with a grin, almost like it was a joke, but the sting was real. His careless remarks hit hard, especially when MC was already trying to find their place in this strange world. Mammon didn’t see the damage; to him, they were just another chore to deal with, something that got in the way of his schemes.
Leviathan wasn’t much better. Whenever MC tried to interact with him, they were met with his judgmental stare, as though they were trespassing. "What’s a normie like you doing here? Don’t you have somewhere else to be?" His voice was laced with annoyance, making them feel like some bizarre creature that had wandered into his private world. He kept his distance, never giving MC a chance to show they could connect with him, too. His obsession with his fictional worlds only made them feel even more like an outsider, as though they’d never understand or be worthy of stepping into his life.
Satan? Satan barely acknowledged their existence. If he ever looked up from his books, it was with frustration, as if MC’s very presence disrupted his thoughts. "Can’t you see I’m busy?" he’d say, his voice cold and dismissive. He wasn’t cruel, but his indifference hurt just as much. It was like MC was invisible unless they somehow got in his way.
And Asmodeus—Asmo treated MC like an accessory, something to admire for a moment and then discard when something more interesting caught his eye. "Darling, if you're going to wear something that dull, I really can’t be seen with you." His words were often accompanied by a smile, but the superficiality behind them was clear. He made them feel like an object, like their only worth was tied to their appearance. Even worse, Asmo never seemed to consider how his constant fixation on perfection weighed on MC, making them question their own worth more and more each day.
Beelzebub? He rarely acknowledged MC at all. His focus was always on food, and even when he did notice them, it wasn’t in a way that made them feel seen. "You smell different. Wonder if you’d taste good," he’d say offhandedly, as if it was just a passing thought. He didn’t mean any harm, but hearing those words was unsettling. It made them feel even less like a person and more like some temporary guest who didn’t matter in the grand scheme of things.
But Lucifer… Lucifer was the hardest to bear. His demands for perfection pressed down on MC like an unbearable weight. He expected them to adapt instantly, to know things they couldn’t possibly know, and when they inevitably made mistakes, the look of disdain in his eyes was enough to crush them. "I need you to be better," he’d say, his voice calm but sharp. MC could never shake the feeling that they were constantly being judged, constantly falling short of his expectations. His false sense of care grated on them the most—he acted like he was guiding them, but to MC, it felt more like control.
Everything was so new, so overwhelming, and no one seemed to care that they were struggling. They couldn’t keep up, and instead of offering help, the brothers’ habits and personalities only deepened their isolation. The teasing, the judgment, the indifference—it was all too much.
So, they ran.
It wasn’t a dramatic escape. They didn’t even pack their bags. They simply left one night, slipping out of the House of Lamentation and making their way to Diavolo’s castle. If anywhere in the Devildom could offer peace, it was there. Leaving behind their diary, a collection of their thoughts, hopes, and fears. They didn’t expect anyone to find it. Writing had been their only outlet, the only way to cope with the growing weight of their struggles.
At first, the brothers didn’t notice their absence. Days passed, and the empty seat at the table went unremarked upon. Only when the small disruptions became too obvious did Mammon speak up.
"Oi, where’s the human? It ain’t like ‘em to just disappear without a word," he grumbled. But even then, his tone was more annoyed than concerned.
Lucifers sharp gaze swept the hallways, his mind turning over the details of MC’s sudden absence. He’d been busy—too busy, really. Between managing his brothers and fulfilling his duties, MC had slipped from his radar, and now… now he realized he hadn’t checked in on them in days.
It wasn’t until Satan, searching for a book, came across MC’s diary tucked away in a corner of their room that the truth was revealed.
Satan made his way to the eldests office, frowning as he thumbed through the pages. "Lucifer, you should see this."
Lucifer took the diary, reading in silence as his eyes traced the words MC had written. The others were called, and soon they all knew what MC had been feeling.
The entries were raw, filled with MC’s doubts and pain. Each brother’s name was scrawled across the pages, followed by confessions of how their words and actions had hurt.
“Mammon makes me feel like I’m nothing but a burden. Every time he calls me useless, it’s like he’s confirming something I’ve already been afraid of. I’m just in the way here.”
“Levi never sees me as more than a ‘normie.’ It’s like I’m some strange animal in his eyes, something he doesn’t want to understand. He shuts me out every time I try to get closer.”
“Satan barely notices I exist. And when he does, it’s always with that look… like I’m a problem he doesn’t want to deal with. I guess I am a problem.”
“Asmo’s always commenting on how I look. I know it’s not personal, but it feels like all I am to him is an object. A pretty thing to dress up, but never good enough to really matter.”
“Beel doesn’t seem to care one way or another. He’s so focused on his hunger that I don’t think he even notices when I’m around. When he does, it’s just another reminder that I don’t really belong here.”
“Lucifer… I don’t know how to describe it. He expects so much from me. Too much. He looks at me like I’m failing him, like I’m not worth the time it takes to help. His care feels false. I can’t keep up with his demands, and I don’t think he even realizes how much I’m struggling just to stay afloat.”
And then came the final entry.
“I don’t think I can do this anymore. Everything is too much. The brothers… they don’t care about me. I’m just another responsibility to them, one they didn’t ask for. I’m seriously thinking about leaving the exchange program. Maybe I should. Maybe I’m not strong enough for this.”
The brothers were silent and exchanged glances, the weight of the words sinking in. They just hadn’t realized how much their habits, their personalities, had affected MC. Mammon’s constant jabs, Levi’s distant hostility, Asmo’s superficial comments, Satan’s cold indifference, Beel’s lack of attention… all of it had chipped away at MC’s sense of self, until they felt like they didn’t matter.
Lucifer closed the diary, his jaw tight. "I didn’t know they felt this way," he said, his voice low.
Mammon shifted uncomfortably. "I didn’t mean it like that. I thought we were just messin’ around."
Levi rubbed the back of his neck. "I didn’t think they cared what I thought. I mean, I barely even know them."
Satan’s frown deepened. "We’ve all been too focused on ourselves."
Asmo’s eyes were wide with guilt. "I didn’t realize… I just thought they were shy. Or adjusting." He looked down, his usual confidence gone.
Beel said nothing, his expression a mix of regret and confusion. He hadn’t even noticed how much MC had been struggling, too wrapped up in his own needs to see theirs.
"We need to bring them back," Lucifer said finally, his voice firm.
At the castle, the brothers had expected to find MC sulking, perhaps still angry or hurt. They had come, armed with apologies and, for once, a united front. Lucifer led them, the weight of the diary heavy in his hands. It felt strange, unsettling even, to think they had been so blind to MC's struggles. They had planned to convince MC to stay, to promise things would be different this time.
But when they arrived, the castle was eerily quiet. Barbatos greeted them at the entrance, his face impassive, but his eyes held a hint of something… regretful.
"Where is MC?" Lucifer asked, his voice tight.
Barbatos looked at the group for a moment before lowering his gaze. "You’re too late."
"What'dya mean, 'too late?'" Mammon blurted, stepping forward, his usual confidence replaced with a flicker of panic.
Barbatos sighed softly, his tone unusually firm. "MC has already returned to the human world. They made the request to Lord Diavolo, and it has been granted."
The weight of his words sank in, and the brothers stood in stunned silence. Lucifer, for once, had no immediate response. Mammon’s shoulders slumped, and Levi's hands fidgeted nervously at his sides. Asmo’s mouth opened as if to say something, but no words came out, while Beel’s expression darkened in quiet contemplation. Satan clenched his fists, the anger rising, though not directed at anyone but themselves.
"Why?" Levi muttered, more to himself than to anyone else.
"Because," Diavolo’s voice echoed through the hall as he approached them, his expression serious, "they didn’t believe things would change. MC had been struggling for some time, and none of you noticed. They felt abandoned. They were overwhelmed, and by the time you realized, it was already too late."
The silence was suffocating as the future King of the Devildom regarded them with a mixture of disappointment and anger.
"You failed," Diavolo’s voice echoed through the room, each word a sharp blade. "You were given one task—one simple requirement as part of this exchange program. To make MC feel welcome. To make them feel as if they belonged. To get to know them and have them know you in return. To foster understanding."
The brothers stood in a line, shoulders hunched, guilt pressing down on them like a heavy weight. None of them dared to speak.
Diavolo’s gaze shifted to Lucifer, his disappointment palpable. "And you," he said, his voice soft but laced with reprimand, "I expected better of you."
Lucifer flinched at the words. His usual mask of calm confidence shattered under the weight of Diavolo’s gaze. For a moment, he felt utterly powerless, a sensation he had long fought to suppress.
"You let this happen under your watch. You let MC suffer to the point where they felt they had no choice but to leave the Devildom behind entirely." Diavolo’s words were like a hammer, each one driving the guilt deeper. "You let them slip through your fingers."
Mammon, Levi, Asmo, Beel, and Satan could do nothing but hang their heads in shame, their usual bickering and antics gone, replaced by the crushing realization of how badly they had failed. This wasn’t just about MC’s disappearance—it was about everything they had overlooked, every word they hadn’t said, every opportunity to make things right that they had ignored.
Diavolo took a breath, his tone softening slightly but still firm. "You were supposed to protect them. Instead, you pushed them away."
The silence was heavy, unbearable. None of them could meet Diavolo’s gaze.
"You will return to the House of Lamentation and reflect on what has happened here today," Diavolo said, his voice a final command. "I hope, for all our sakes, that this failure teaches you something."
With those parting words, Diavolo turned his back to them, and the brothers were left with nothing but the weight of their failure pressing down on their shoulders.
They sulked back to the House of Lamentation, each one lost in their own thoughts, their usual banter replaced with a somber silence. They had been too late. MC was gone.
Lucifer
Lucifer sat in his study, the heavy silence of the House of Lamentation pressing down on him. The others had retreated to their rooms, each of them nursing their own guilt, but Lucifer remained still, staring at the open diary on his desk. MC’s words were a stark reminder of his failure—his failure to see, his failure to act, his failure to protect. The very thing he prided himself on—his ability to maintain control, to ensure perfection in everything under his watch—had crumbled in the worst possible way.
Failure.
The word echoed in his mind, gnawing at him like a relentless force. Lucifer's hands clenched into fists, his knuckles turning white as his anger rose, burning in his chest. How could he have allowed this to happen? How could he, of all people, have been so blind? He had always maintained order, ensured everything ran smoothly. He had taken on every responsibility, every burden, to prevent things from falling apart. But this...this was a disaster.
It was intolerable.
The weight of Diavolo’s words still hung heavy in the air: I expected better of you. The sting of those words cut deeper than any reprimand he had ever received. Diavolo had placed his trust in him, and he had let him down. Worse, he had let MC down—an innocent, fragile human who had come to the Devildom trusting they would be safe, that they would find a place here.
Lucifer stood abruptly, shoving his chair back with a force that sent it crashing against the wall. His usually composed demeanor shattered as the rage he had been holding back erupted. He slammed his fists down onto the desk, the sound echoing through the room. Papers scattered, and the sharp crack of wood under pressure reverberated through the air.
How had he missed it? How had he, with all his precision and attention to detail, been so oblivious to MC’s suffering? His grip on control, his obsession with perfection, had blinded him to what was truly important. He had been so focused on maintaining order, on keeping his brothers in line, that he hadn’t even noticed the cracks forming right in front of him.
And now, it was too late.
MC was gone—back to the human world. They hadn’t even waited to see if things would change, if the brothers would make things right. They had made their decision, and it was a resounding statement of just how much Lucifer had failed them.
His chest tightened with frustration. He had been so focused on pushing MC to adapt, to fit the mold he thought they needed to fill, that he had ignored the reality of their struggles. He had looked at them through a lens of expectation rather than understanding, and now they were lost to him. To them all.
Lucifer closed his eyes, taking a deep breath, trying to reign in the storm of anger and guilt coursing through him. This failure—the bitter taste of it—was unacceptable. He couldn’t undo what had been done. He couldn’t change the fact that he had let Diavolo down, that he had let MC down.
But he could make sure it never happened again.
Slowly, Lucifer opened his eyes, the flames of anger still burning but now tempered by a cold resolve. He would not allow this to break him. He would not allow this failure to define him. He had to remain strong—not just for himself, but for Diavolo, for the Devildom, and for his brothers.
But deep down, the rage simmered, a constant reminder of his imperfection, his weakness. He had been shown the one thing he hated most: his own limits.
Failure.
It was something Lucifer would never forget. And never forgive. Not himself, and not the others.
Mammon
Mammon sat on the edge of his bed, hunched over with his elbows on his knees, his hands tangled in his hair. The silence in the House of Lamentation was deafening, pressing down on him in a way that made his chest feel tight. MC was gone—back to the human world. They hadn’t even said goodbye.
His first instinct had been to brush it off, like he always did. Make some flippant comment about how MC would be back soon enough, that they just needed a little time to cool off. But as the hours passed and reality settled in, the truth was undeniable.
MC wasn’t coming back.
"Dammit..." Mammon muttered under his breath, his fingers tightening around his hair as if that could stop the thoughts running wild in his head.
He replayed the last few weeks in his mind—the constant teasing, the jabs, the way he’d brush off their efforts with a casual, "Oi, don’t be so useless." He never meant it. Not really. It was just how he talked, right? But now… Now, he couldn’t stop thinking about how it must’ve sounded to them.
How it must’ve felt.
He always thought MC knew he didn’t mean anything by it. They were just words, stupid little insults thrown out without thinking. It wasn’t like he actually thought they were useless. Hell, he was actually starting to like them—though he’d never admit it out loud.
Mammon groaned, flopping back onto his bed and staring up at the ceiling. Why did he always do this? Why did he push away the people he cared about, acting like they were some kind of nuisance when they weren’t? It was just… easier that way. It was easier to hide behind the tough guy act, to pretend like nothing bothered him. But it wasn’t true. It had never been true.
And now it was too late.
"I didn’t mean it," he whispered, his voice breaking in the quiet room. "I didn’t mean any of it..."
But what good did that do now? They were gone. MC was gone, and it was his fault.
Mammon’s heart clenched as he thought about all the times he’d made fun of them, all the times he’d called them a burden, a hassle. He’d acted like MC was just some human getting in the way of his plans, but the truth was that they had become more important to him than he’d realized.
He didn’t show it—he didn’t know how—but they mattered to him. They made him feel different, like he wasn’t just the "Great Mammon," the greedy demon who was always causing trouble. When MC looked at him, it felt like they saw something more, something better. And now? They were gone because of him.
Mammon kicked his legs out in frustration, his shoes thudding against the floor. How could he have been so stupid? Why did he always have to mess things up? He had the chance to make MC feel welcome, to make them feel like they belonged here, and he blew it.
And Diavolo’s words kept ringing in his ears. You failed them.
"Yeah, I know!" Mammon snapped at the empty room, his voice harsh with guilt. "I know I screwed up! I get it!"
He sat up suddenly, running his hands down his face in frustration. This wasn’t how it was supposed to go. He was supposed to be their protector, their guardian. They were his pact holder, he was their first. He was supposed to look out for them, not drive them away. He hated that feeling—the helplessness that came with realizing he couldn’t fix this. He couldn’t just throw money at it or charm his way out like he usually did.
MC was gone, and it hurt more than he wanted to admit.
Mammon stood up, pacing his room. His mind raced, thinking of what he could’ve said or done differently. Maybe if he’d just told them how he really felt, if he’d stopped pushing them away and acting like they were a bother… Maybe they wouldn’t have left.
"I should’ve been better," he muttered, clenching his fists. "I should’ve told ‘em… I should’ve made ‘em feel like they mattered."
But he hadn’t. And now he was stuck with the gnawing regret that he might never see MC again. They were back in the human world, and they’d never want to come back to the Devildom, especially not after how he and the others had treated them.
He was the Great Mammon, sure. But what good was that title if he couldn’t even keep the one person who actually made him feel like he was more than just his sin?
With a choked sob, Mammon collapsed back onto his bed, staring at the ceiling as the tears began to fall.
He’d failed them. There was no getting around that. And the worst part? He’d never get the chance to make it right.
Leviathan
Leviathan sat in front of his monitors, eyes staring blankly at the paused screen of his latest game. His headphones sat around his neck, the usual buzz of online matches long forgotten. The quiet of his room wasn’t the kind he liked. It wasn’t peaceful or calming. It was suffocating.
MC was gone. Back to the human world. They had left without saying anything, without a word, without… him knowing. He hadn’t even noticed they were gone until the others started talking about it. And now that they weren’t here, the reality of the situation was starting to sink in.
Levi chewed on his thumbnail, anxiety swirling in his gut like an endless whirlpool. How could he have missed it? How could he not have seen what was happening right under his nose? His stomach churned with guilt as he thought about the way he’d treated MC since the moment they arrived.
Normie.
That was what he called them. Over and over again. He’d pushed them away, called them a nuisance, acted like they didn’t belong. He had no idea if they liked anime or games, but instead of giving them a chance to show they could understand his world, he had shut them out before they could even try. Why? Because they weren’t like him. Because they weren’t part of his world. Because it was easier to call them a "normie" and keep them at arm’s length than it was to let someone else get close.
Levi groaned, burying his face in his hands. He hated himself. Why did he always do this? Why did he always ruin things before they had a chance to be good? He had been scared—scared that MC would judge him like everyone else did, scared that they would see how awkward, how pathetic he really was. So he kept them away, treated them like some kind of animal when really… he had wanted them to be a part of his life.
They had tried. He could see it now, in hindsight. MC had tried to talk to him, had tried to get to know him, had actually listened to him when he'd rant. And what had he done? He’d dismissed them. Pushed them away. Called them human or normie—never their name—as if that was the only thing they could be.
He swallowed hard, guilt gnawing at his insides. If only he hadn’t been so wrapped up in his own insecurities, maybe things would have been different. Maybe MC wouldn’t have left.
But they did.
Levi curled in on himself, hugging his knees to his chest as the realization settled in. They were gone, and it was his fault. His fault for being too afraid to let them in, too scared to admit that maybe he wanted them around more than he’d ever let on. He hadn’t even realized how much he missed them until now, until the space they used to occupy in the house, in his life, felt empty.
And Diavolo’s words kept ringing in his ears. You failed them.
"Of course I did," Levi muttered, his voice thick with bitterness. "I always fail."
He had failed to be a good brother, failed to be a friend, and now, he had failed MC.
"They must think I hate them," Levi whispered, his chest tightening painfully. "They probably think I never wanted them around." His voice cracked, and he quickly wiped at his eyes with his sleeve, but it didn’t stop the tears that threatened to fall.
Because that wasn’t true. It had never been true.
Levi wanted them around—he had liked having them around. But how could they have known that when all he ever did was push them away, call them a normie, and act like they didn’t matter? He had been too caught up in his own head, too worried about them seeing the worst parts of him, to let them see the good.
Now they were back in the human world, far away from him, and he had no idea if they would ever come back. And if they did, why would they want to come back to him? The shut-in otaku who made them feel like they didn’t belong?
"Stupid," he muttered angrily, wiping his eyes again. "I’m so stupid…"
He stood up suddenly, pacing the room, his hands tugging at his hair in frustration. What if MC never came back? What if they decided to stay in the human world forever, away from all the pain and rejection the Devildom had offered them?
Levi’s heart pounded in his chest, panic rising as the what-ifs piled up in his mind. They were gone. And he didn’t know if he’d ever get the chance to tell them the truth, that he wanted them here, that he—needed them here.
But now it was too late.
With a deep, shaky breath, Levi sank into his tub, curling up again as his anxiety wrapped around him like a suffocating blanket.
It was always too late for him.
Satan
Satan sat in the library, the silence around him sharp and oppressive. The book in his hands remained unopened, his mind too preoccupied to focus on anything but the gnawing feeling of guilt twisting in his chest. MC had left. Gone back to the human world without so much as a word, without waiting for anything to change.
He ran a hand through his hair, jaw clenched tightly as Diavolo’s admonishment replayed in his head. You failed them. The words stung more than he expected, not because they were untrue, but because they were painfully accurate. He had failed them. They all had. And now the damage was done.
Satan wasn’t like Lucifer. He didn’t thrive on control or perfection, but failure still left a bitter taste in his mouth, especially when it was something that could have been prevented. He prided himself on understanding things—on reading people, situations, emotions. And yet, somehow, he had missed what was right in front of him.
I barely even acknowledged them, he thought bitterly, eyes narrowing as the realization sank deeper. When MC first arrived, they were just another part of the exchange program—an obligation. Someone he was forced to tolerate. He had never thought of them as more than that.
They had tried to speak to him on several occasions, asking questions, trying to understand the world around them. He had dismissed them each time. Not out of cruelty, but out of indifference. There were always more important things to focus on, more pressing matters in his mind. Books to read, knowledge to gather. What did it matter if a fragile human was feeling out of place? He’d barely given them a second thought, and now that they were gone, that indifference was coming back to haunt him.
Satan drummed his fingers on the arm of his chair, irritation bubbling just beneath the surface. He wasn’t angry at MC—not at all. He was angry at himself. He should have seen it. He should have recognized the signs. But instead, he’d brushed them off, barely looking up from his books when they entered the room. It was no wonder they had felt invisible. To him, they had been.
"How could I have been so blind?" he muttered under his breath, his grip tightening on the edges of his book.
His dismissive attitude had hurt them, but it wasn’t just the indifference—it was the frustration. The few times he had acknowledged MC, it had been with impatience. He’d grown annoyed when they asked questions, irritated when they didn’t immediately grasp the complex information he threw at them. He had expected too much from them. Expected them to just understand a world they’d only just entered.
I was unfair.
The admission grated on him, but it was the truth. He hadn’t given them the time or attention they needed. He had treated them like a distraction, like an inconvenience. And for what? Because they weren’t like him? Because they didn’t understand things as quickly as he wanted them to?
It was absurd. It was… disappointing. In himself.
Satan leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees as he rubbed his temples, trying to keep the anger in check. His temper was always there, simmering just beneath the surface, but this was different. This wasn’t the kind of anger he could lash out at. It wasn’t something he could destroy or control. This was guilt—a slow, burning guilt that twisted in his gut and left him feeling powerless.
I failed them, he thought again, the words echoing in his mind like a relentless chant.
They had left because of him. Because of the way he treated them, the way he ignored their presence. The diary had made it clear—MC felt like they didn’t belong, like they were a burden. And he had done nothing to change that.
He had let them slip away. And now they were back in the human world, far beyond his reach.
Satan stood up abruptly, pacing the library with sharp, determined steps. He hated this feeling—this powerlessness. He wasn’t like Lucifer, obsessed with perfection, but he wasn’t one to accept failure either. Yet here he was, unable to fix the mess he had helped create.
He stopped in front of a bookshelf, his hand hovering over the spines of the books. Usually, the smell of old pages and the promise of knowledge would calm him, would ground him. But now? It just felt hollow.
Books couldn’t solve this.
Knowledge couldn’t solve this.
For once, all the intellect in the world meant nothing. He had failed MC not because he lacked understanding, but because he hadn’t cared enough to try.
He closed his eyes, frustration boiling in his chest. "I should’ve done better," he whispered, his voice low and filled with regret. "I should’ve listened."
But it was too late. They were gone. And there was nothing he could do to change that.
For someone who prided himself on knowing so much, Satan realized now that he had understood so little. And that knowledge—more than anything else—cut deeper than any reprimand Diavolo could have given him.
Asmodeus
Asmodeus sat in front of his vanity, staring at his reflection. Normally, he would be admiring the flawless way his skin glowed, the way his hair framed his face perfectly, or how his latest outfit highlighted every one of his best features. But today, the usual spark wasn’t there.
MC was gone. They had left the Devildom and returned to the human world, and they hadn’t even said goodbye.
Asmo frowned, twisting a lock of hair around his finger as he glanced down at the collection of beauty products scattered across his vanity. How could they have left like that? Without saying anything to him? No farewell? No goodbye hug? They had just… disappeared.
And they didn’t even tell me?
That part stung. He was Asmodeus, after all. Everyone loved him. Why wouldn’t they want to talk to him, to tell him what was going on in their head before leaving? It wasn’t like he had been mean to them—he’d been nothing but fabulous! He’d complimented them, given them fashion tips, even helped them choose outfits when they were looking drab.
He huffed and crossed his arms, his eyes flicking back to the mirror. "I don’t understand," he murmured to himself, inspecting his perfectly manicured nails. "They could’ve at least told me if something was wrong."
But as he thought about it, something uncomfortable started to settle in his chest. He hadn’t exactly treated MC like someone who mattered, had he? They were just the new human, someone for him to toy with, to dress up like a doll, to show off. He had treated them more like an accessory than a person. Every compliment he gave was followed by a backhanded comment about how they could do better, how they could look more fabulous. He had made everything about their appearance—about how they looked, what they wore—without ever thinking about what they wanted, how they felt.
And that diary entry… the one about him.
“Asmo’s always commenting on how I look. I know it’s not personal, but it feels like all I am to him is an object. A pretty thing to dress up, but never good enough to really matter.”
Asmo’s heart clenched uncomfortably as those words echoed in his mind. They hadn’t been meant for him to read, but now that he had, he couldn’t stop thinking about them. MC thought they didn’t matter. That they weren’t enough for him.
That wasn’t true! He had thought they were cute from the start. Sure, they had a long way to go in terms of style and confidence, but he had liked being around them. In his own way, he had enjoyed their presence. He just… never said it. Never showed it beyond superficial praise.
Had he really made them feel like that? Like they were just some toy to be discarded when something more interesting came along?
He bit his lip, eyes dropping from the mirror. "I didn’t mean to make them feel that way," he whispered, a strange knot of guilt tightening in his chest. "I just wanted them to look their best, to be their best."
But that wasn’t really the point, was it? MC hadn’t needed someone to tell them how to dress or how to look. They had needed someone to tell them they belonged, someone to make them feel like they were important beyond appearances.
Asmo sighed, sitting back in his chair and staring up at the ceiling. He hated this feeling—this heavy, nagging sense of regret. It wasn’t like him. He was Asmodeus, the Avatar of Lust, the most beautiful being in the Devildom. People flocked to him for advice, for attention. Everyone loved him. So why did it matter so much that one human didn’t?
Because it wasn’t just any human. It was MC.
They had trusted him. They had spent time with him, laughed at his jokes, let him play with their hair and help them pick outfits. And what had he done? He’d brushed them off like they were just another pretty face, like they weren’t worth getting to know beyond the surface.
And now they were gone. And it was his fault.
Asmo twirled a ring on his finger absentmindedly, the usual sparkle of his jewelry doing nothing to lift his mood. "They probably think I never cared about them," he muttered, his voice soft. "And maybe I didn’t… at least, not the way they needed me to."
He hated admitting it, but it was true. He had cared more about how they looked than how they felt. He had been so focused on making them into something he could be proud of that he hadn’t stopped to think about what they needed.
And now they were back in the human world, thinking they were never good enough for him. Thinking they didn’t matter.
For the first time in a long time, Asmo wasn’t thinking about himself. He wasn’t thinking about how he looked or what outfit he’d wear tomorrow. He was thinking about MC—about how he had hurt them without even realizing it. And that guilt, that realization, clung to him like a weight he couldn’t shake.
He leaned forward, resting his elbows on the vanity and burying his face in his hands.
But it was too late now. MC was gone. And all the beauty in the world couldn’t change that.
Beelzebub
Beel sat at the dining table, staring blankly at the plate in front of him. His usual appetite was gone, a strange hollowness taking its place. The silence felt heavier than usual, and for the first time in a long while, food couldn’t fill the emptiness inside him.
MC was gone. They had returned to the human world. And he hadn't even cared that they had disappeared.
He ran a hand through his hair, his brow furrowing as the thought settled in. He hadn’t paid much attention to them, hadn’t really thought about them as anything more than a human—something fragile, something that he wasn’t supposed to eat. They were just there, part of the exchange program, someone to tolerate but not worth focusing on.
Beel sighed, glancing at the uneaten food on his plate. It didn’t make sense to him. Why did it feel like something was missing now that they were gone? He hadn’t been particularly close to them. He’d never really taken much interest in what they did or said. They were just… human. And humans were something he didn’t think about much, aside from the occasional urge to eat one. But even that wasn’t really a problem. He knew better.
But still, the fact that they were gone—it didn’t sit right with him.
He leaned back in his chair, arms crossed over his chest as he thought back to the few interactions they’d had. Whenever he saw them, he’d mostly been focused on food. Sometimes he’d make offhand comments about how they smelled different, or how they might taste good, but that was just the hunger talking. He didn’t mean it personally. He had never meant to make them feel uncomfortable.
But maybe he had.
“Beel doesn’t seem to care one way or another. He’s so focused on his hunger that I don’t think he even notices when I’m around. When he does, it’s just another reminder that I don’t really belong here.”
He frowned, the knot in his stomach tightening. They were right. He hadn’t cared one way or the other. To him, they were just another face in the Devildom, another human who wasn’t supposed to be eaten. He’d never gone out of his way to talk to them or get to know them.
He hadn’t thought they mattered.
But maybe they did.
Beel sighed again, his large hands resting on the table as he stared at his empty plate. He hadn’t done anything to make them feel welcome, hadn’t shown any interest in them beyond his usual blunt, hunger-driven remarks. To him, MC had just been part of the background, something he didn’t need to think about.
But now they were gone. And the more he thought about it, the more he realized that maybe he had missed something important.
He had seen how the others treated MC—the teasing from Mammon, the indifference from Satan, the distance from Levi. He had heard the way Lucifer demanded more from them, how Asmo insulted them under the guise of advice. Beel hadn’t said much, hadn’t gotten involved, but he hadn’t done anything to stop it either. And now that he thought about it, that made him just as guilty as the rest of them.
"They must’ve felt so alone," Beel muttered to himself, his brow furrowing. "And I didn’t do anything to help."
He wasn’t sure why it bothered him so much now. Maybe it was because MC had been part of their lives for a while, and now that they were gone, there was a strange emptiness where they used to be. He hadn’t realized how much he had gotten used to seeing them around, hearing their voice, watching them navigate the chaos of the House of Lamentation.
But now that they were gone, he couldn’t shake the feeling that something was missing.
Beel stood up, pacing the room slowly. He wasn’t like Lucifer or Satan, always thinking things through, always analyzing the situation. He didn’t think too deeply about the people around him most of the time. But now? Now he wished he had paid more attention. Maybe if he had, MC wouldn’t have felt so isolated, so invisible.
"They were more than just a human," he muttered, a pang of guilt hitting him. "But I never treated them like they were."
He hadn’t thought they mattered, and that was his biggest mistake. MC had been a part of their world, even if they were human. They had been right there, trying to find their place, and Beel had done nothing. He hadn’t meant to hurt them, hadn’t meant to make them feel like they didn’t belong—but his indifference had done that anyway.
And now, it was too late.
Beel stopped pacing, leaning against the wall and staring down at the floor. He didn’t know what to do with this feeling. It wasn’t like hunger—he couldn’t just eat something and make it go away. This was different. It was guilt, and it was heavy.
"I should’ve cared more," he whispered, his voice quiet in the empty room. "I should’ve made sure they knew they were welcome."
But they hadn’t known. And now they were back in the human world, far away from all of them.
Beel clenched his fists, frustration welling up inside him. He hated that they had left feeling like they didn’t matter. He hated that he hadn’t done anything to make them stay.
But what could he do now?
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luvt0kki · 1 year ago
Text
INTERLUDE | OPENING SEQUENCE
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⋆ ˚。⋆୨୧ s.w.m masterlist ୨୧⋆ ˚。⋆ taglist ⋆ ˚。⋆ ୨୧
This scene that locked me up The sequence that's like forever Stay for me, stay for me, stay for me I can't get used to it, used to it, used to it
🎧: Opening Sequence - TXT
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previous | INTERLUDE | next
pairings: ot8 x f!reader (san x reader)
w.c : 10k ( im sorry for any errors)
cw: mature, ,minors do not interact, nsfw, reader is afab, slow burn, polyamory, smut , bittersweet, angst, MC's background is inspired by Black Widow's background with the Red Room, reader is called sweet heart/baby, hints of abuse/manipulation, mc’s past, mention of their training days, injuries, scars, loss of virginity, first time, very very very longgggggg chapter I’m sorry
REMINDER: my works do not represent the irl members in any way, this is purely a work of FICTION.
a/n : surprise? SPECIAL CHAPTER!!!! I hope you guys like this one. I didn’t initially plan to write this but after posting chapter 005 I wanted to write something different or something else and this came about. I hope you guys like. Thank you for being so patient with me 🥺💗
DO NOT REPOST, TRANSLATE, PLAGIARISE, OR OTHERWISE REPURPOSE ANY OF MY WORK HERE. I DO NOT NOR WILL ALLOW IT.
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“How long do you think before they find us here?”
The young assassin paused, his heart dropping. Never has he ever heard you, YOU, out of all the graduated students of the Academy, sound like this.
You were always so sure of yourself but now, he was hearing a completely different person yet so familiar. When was the last time he heard you like this? He was quick to recall it and that ache in his chest began to feel as if he was burning from the inside. This small, unsure, and weak voice belonged to the little girl he grew up with before the academy changed everything and he never heard you like this again.
Til today.
He was scared to turn around.
If your own resolve was shaking then the situation was worse than he thought.
San shook his head and continued to look around the padded room looking for any signs of a possible escape. Even if you two did get out, you two would have nothing but your knives and your fists.
“No one’s going to come for us, aren’t they Sannie?” You choked out his nickname so softly, that he felt his heart broke. “At the end of the day…” you went on, the fears of a little girl that San had failed to protect breaking through the facade the Academy molded and chiseled you in. “I’m just one of their many weapons. The other girls in the Academy…they’re good. Better. I will be of no use soon.”
San’s hands were beginning to tremble uncontrollably as he reloaded the gun. You were the Academy’s proudest creation, you had set the standard. Though those things were true, these were your fears. They were just as real.
“We’ve sent a Morse code to them. They’ll find us soon. They won’t let you go as easily.” San swallowed the lump in his throat trying to maintain composure and not let the impending doom of you both get to him.
What made him sadder was that he was right. The Academy won’t let you go. You were chained to them in a way, he wasn’t.
“Sannie…”
They could afford to lose him. He was a part of the top three of those who graduated with him but he wasn’t the first of the batch.
“They’ll come for you.”
The room that confined you two was dim. The skylight let some moonlight shine through to illuminate what it could in the darkness you two were submerged in. Did your captors really believe the Academy would buy their ransom for two of their assassins? They would come with a brute force that would leave them nothing in ashes. If no one came for the two of you, they’ll kill you both or worse, sell the two of you off to the market.
San would kill them before they even thought of selling you as a slave.
“Sannie, it’s cold.”
His composure broke then.
Gone was the weapon the Academy created.
Without any hesitation, San went to where you had been sitting (on the white sheet mattress in the room they threw you two in) then pulled you onto his lap with his arms wrapped around you. Your skin was cold to the touch and his desperation to hold you only grew. He cradled you so gently in his arms, scared that if he embraced you tighter you’d shatter.
“It’s going to be okay,” he whispered, resting his chin on the top of your head as he kept his gaze up, fighting back tears and the urge to press his lips on the the crown of your head. “I’m here. I'm not going anywhere.”
You were taught to never take anyone’s words seriously. Always doubt them, they once said. Doubt them until they prove it because you can never know what they mean and yet, you believed every word San said.
Every promise he has ever made, he kept them. Everything he said he would do, he did. But even if he didn’t prove to be a man of his word, the part of you that you pushed in the dark, would believe him blindly.
His strong arms held you in a way you never knew you needed to be held and the warmth of his body was giving you, melted away the armor you didn’t have the luxury to take off.
“Sannie,”
He loved it when you called him Sannie. Since you two met, he was your Sannie. If you asked him now, just once, to be yours, he’d be yours forever.
“Yeah?” He caressed your back in gentle circles, taking note of how your shivering lessened and your breathing calmed.
You didn’t continue your thought. It got stuck in your throat. How could you possibly say what you wanted to? Instead, you opted to bury your face into his neck. You’ll think about it for a bit…because what if it was the wrong time to say it?
“Can I hold your hand?”
Your voice was such a soft whisper, that San almost didn’t hear it. It was like you were embarrassed to have even asked, even though he’s held your hand so many times in secret during your training days when it was an evaluation day.
San hummed in response and carefully, still cradling you in his lap with your head leaning on his chest, slipped his hand with yours. He stared at your hands as he did. His hand was bigger than yours and his heart dropped when he realized you had taken off your gloves. Such delicate hands were bruised at the knuckles and hands that only ever touched or brushed him so gently.
He knew in your head you could only see how stained your arms were with blood.
“Your hands are cold,” he pointed out, pouting a little at the fact and like he did when you were younger, he took both your hands and brought them close to his mouth to breathe warmth into them.
You felt your heart thump particularly strong in your chest. The feelings you’ve had for San that you had hidden away because you were told you could never be loved nor love for you were only a weapon, returned.
Because you are a weapon, you would only ever hurt the people you love.
“How are you so warm?” You chuckled, falling into a comfort you denied yourself for so long. “If I remember correctly, you were such a small petite thing when we were younger. I was afraid you wouldn’t make it past the selection.”
He laughed softly at the memory. “I didn’t want to be left behind. I need to be with you no matter what.” He let himself speak freely and honestly, letting his hands warm yours.
“I would’ve purposely failed if that was the case. I wouldn’t want to continue on without you.” You admitted, feeling the ache of your muscles finally hit you.
“They would’ve known if you did.”
“That’s true.”
“I would catch up to you no matter what. To be by your side…” San paused, afraid to say what he wanted to in fear that you may not feel the same. “For a long time, I believe that’s where I belong.”
His words caught you off guard. Did Sannie know? Did he know that you loved him? There was no way he could but the possibility of attraction between the two of you could not be ruled out so easily. It was there. You both knew it. You two just never spoke of it.
“Do you still believe that?” You asked, feeling a little braver and desperate.
What if this was it? It had been four days since the enemy got the upper hand and immobilized you and San and sealed you two up in this room. What if the Academy did abandon you both? Weapons are replaceable.
“I’m here with you now, aren’t I?”
He’s always been there.
You lifted your head off his shoulder to gaze up at him.
Gone was the little boy you worried about whenever you two trained separately. The one who was easily thrown and bullied around by his much stronger contenders. You were afraid of losing him even then because you had wondered why someone with such a gentle heart could ever hurt people. For goodness sake, he continued to let himself get beaten up just because one of the much younger trainees out of desperation and hunger, stole a piece of roasted sweet potato.
Before you now was a man. San still had the handsomeness he’s had since he was younger except it matured and bloomed into sharp features and a striking beauty that lost all the softness of his younger self. His body was no longer frail and sickly. His back and shoulders became broad, lean muscles had grown and given him more shape that reminded you of the prowess of a black panther.
But when he smiled.
He was the Sannie you cared for and loved so deeply…so quietly.
“Can you promise me something?” You asked, feeling your heart begin to ache.
“Anything for you.” He smiled softly down at you and you wished he hadn’t because it’d made your heart want him even more.
“If we get out of this alive…” you felt tears begin to form in your eyes. “Promise me you’ll leave the academy.”
“Y/N—,” he began to protest, sitting up a little bit you shushed him gently and changed your positions.
You cupped his face gently with your hands and looked straight into his eyes.
“When we get out of here, you need to disappear. Leave this life behind.”
San has never seen you cry since the Selection. Your eyes which were usually blank and cold, and that only ever warmed when you looked at him were glassy with tears and there was fear in them. Pure fear and hurt.
“P-please, Sannie. Leave the Academy.”
Why were you asking him something so difficult?
“You deserve more than this life. You should be able to live freely and to love freely. Leave all this behind. Leave me behind.” You were begging him now, your hot tears falling onto his beautiful face. His eyes were so gentle as they looked up at you.
“Don’t ask me of this, Y/N.” He tried to be stern to mask the breaking of his heart. “You know I can’t do that!” He wrapped his arms around your waist. “I can’t. I can’t…I can’t.” His voice was trembling, both your fears breaking you down.
“Do it for me, Sannie.” You wiped his tears away with your thumbs, fighting the urge to kiss the beauty mark on his upper cheek. “If one of us gets to be free, it should be you.”
“That’s not fair, Y/N.” He grabbed you by the back of your neck while his other hand brought your leg to be able to wrap around him, consumed by the need to be close to you. He pressed your forehead against his.
“We both deserve to live. If we’re talking about who should be free, it should be you.” He said through gritted teeth, still not letting all his composure go. How could you think so little of your life? “You’re not a weapon.”
He took your hand and placed it over where his heart would be. “We both have hearts that beat. We both have tears to cry. You breathe just like I do. You feel just like I do…you can love just like I do.”
San’s words echoed in your head, they rang like an alarm as those words breached the codes that the Academy programmed into you.
You couldn’t think straight. None of you could.
‘You can love just like I do.’
Could you, really?
Your bleary eyes searched San’s glimmering onyx orbs. You were scared to find nothing but conviction and such surety that made you believe him that you could. The hope in his eyes frightened you.
You didn’t know how to love. You only assumed to know that love was a precious emotion you could never have. The Academy said love was a weakness but all the training and programming they did, seemed to not exist at this very moment. Neither did it for San.
Well in his case, you had always been his exception to every rule. He’d break rules, laws, and bones for you.
“I don’t know if I can,” you sobbed softly. The fact you don’t even know how to love makes you feel as if you weren’t human.
Love was different from lust. You knew that. Everyone, even those under the Academy, had needs and everyone was left to handle it themselves as long as it didn’t compromise their abilities or get in the way of missions.
To put it simply, they just fucked for the feeling of it.
But no one touched you. You wouldn’t let it happen. You couldn’t. The other girls were nice enough to tell you how to do it yourself and you wondered if San has ever needed to get those needs out of the way…and the thought of who it could’ve been with made your chest ache at the thought.
“You can.” He smiled, so soft and gentle, it made you wonder if anyone else in the galaxy could look at you that way. So fondly and not the monster and killer you really were.
San held your hand that was against his heart tightly, still smiling up at you so sweetly you didn’t think you could handle that look. It was so foreign to you.
“Y/N, if you’ll let me,” San didn’t care anymore. If you two were going to die tomorrow and if he was going to do as you made him promise, he’d hold you and speak as if this was his last night in this life. “Let me make you feel. It doesn’t have to be love. But please, let me make you truly feel.”
You knew you could say no and it would be okay. All your time in the Academy, you realized the only time you ever felt safe was when you were with San. You didn’t have to keep your guard up with him and you didn’t have to lie to him.
Throwing all caution out the window and focusing on San, just him, you exhaled softly, unaware that you had been holding your breath.
“O-okay.” You held his face softly once more, telling yourself he was real. That he was here, he had never left you not once and he wouldn’t leave you til you told him to. “P-please Sannie.” Your voice quivered. “I want to feel alive.”
“Don’t cry, my darling,” he cooed, wiping your tears away. “You know I’ll do anything for you, right?”
You nodded, letting yourself enjoy the soft touch of his hands in your hair and on your face, and the warmth of his embrace.
“Can I kiss you?”
You felt heat bloom in your cheeks at the question. San knew you’d never been kissed. Well, he knew because first of all, he was your closest friend in the Academy and you told him everything, and secondly, he may or may not have scared off anyone else who wanted to.
“O-okay.” You’ve never felt so shy.
“I won’t ever hurt you, Y/N.” He leaned closer, your heart racing you felt as if it was going to jump out of your chest. “With everything I am and as long as I’m around, I won’t let anything hurt you.”
Your lips parted the slightest bit as his sweet words overwhelmed you with a sensation you’ve only ever felt in tingles whenever you were with him and now they were bursts of warmth that radiated throughout your body.
The plumpness of your lips and that innocent and pure way you gazed at home made him lose all his resolve. Softly as if handling the finest and most fragile porcelain, he pressed his lips against yours, their softness and their warmth, and the closeness of it all, made him feel as if the world had stopped.
You didn’t know what to do but when his lips gently moved against yours, a part of you made you do the same. It’s like your body needed to reciprocate his actions naturally. Maybe it was because you had thought about kissing him and wondered about it late at night til your face was hot and you were flustered at the imagination of what it’d feel to be closer to Sannie in a different way…
Gently, San helped you sit comfortably on his lap, supporting your back as he kissed you, tasting the sweetness of your lips that had a hint of metallic taste from the small cut on your lower lip. He’d kiss away all your cuts and bruises if you’d let him. He’d kiss them to make you forget the pain.
San was still holding back though.
He didn’t want to do anything you didn’t want.
But the way you had begun to kiss him back with the same need as he did, only made it harder for him to not lose himself.
Pulling away reluctantly, he looked at you. Your pretty lashes fluttered so prettily as you blinked dreamily at him, your lips were a glistening pink and your cheeks were glowing.
What made San fall even harder in that moment was the way you shyly looked away when he had been staring.
“Sannie…” you murmured, squeezing his shoulders nervously and completely aware that you were sitting on his lap, straddling him.
You just had your first kiss. San had just kissed you.
“Can I touch you?”
You felt your ears grow hot. “Aren’t you already?” You murmured. His hands were already on your waist and when they weren’t there they were in your hair or caressing your face.
“Let me rephrase that,” He chuckled and pressed his lips onto the corner of your mouth. “Can I…” he kissed your cheek, each kiss making warmth bloom wherever they touched you. “Touch…” He caressed the curve of your spine, your lower back tingling at the gentle touch. “All of you?”
“Y-yes.” You had uttered out so quickly and softly, that you felt embarrassed. You didn’t even think twice.
“You can touch me too,” San began to kiss along the column of your neck, the sensation making you shiver. “You can touch me however you want, Y/N.” He gripped your hips just a little bit tighter, enjoying the way you cutely squirmed.
“Sannie,” you softly called out to him, making him part from your neck which he had been kissing and licking.
His brows rose at your call, waiting for whatever you needed to say but in all honesty, you just needed to feel his lips on yours again.
So without a word, you cradled San’s handsome face in both hands before crashing your lips onto his, surprising not only him but also yourself at how greedy you had become. You didn’t know you could feel such sensations and the kiss just sparked a flame you never knew could come alive, and now that it was lit, it began to burn.
“T-touch me,” you whispered desperately between kisses, his own lips hungrily kissing you back.
San felt as if he was dreaming when those words slipped past your lips and even more so how prettily you moaned when caressed the underside of your breast with his thumb. He was surprised with how sensitive you were. You were still in your cat suit and yet you reacted so quickly to his touch.
His lips and your lips messily danced with desperation to drink each other's heat and passion. Your own hands had begun to tug at his armored protective suit while he also made quick work of your catsuit. San not wanting to leave the warmth of your lips, took his time to unzip the front of your suit. He wanted to be gentle with you despite the lust that was burning him from the inside out he just wanted to feel you and make you feel.
His lips finally left yours only to attack your neck with hot kisses, making you moan out softly. Gently he laid you on the worn-out mattress, parting from you completely so he could kneel between your thighs. Your eyes remained on him as he removed his protective vest, discarding it somewhere in the room before he peeled off his long sleeve over his head. His muscular chiseled body was illuminated by the moonlight, every ridge and ripple of muscle was accentuated by the shadows of the room. You felt a familiar heat pool in your lower body the more you stared at San’s physique and you blushed and turned away when he caught you staring.
The edge of San’s mouth twitched into a small smile, finding your timidness to be rather adorable. He liked how flustered you became because of him. San reached for your hips to pull you closer, your eyes widening when he did.
San found the zipper of your catsuit again, his heart thrumming in his chest as he slowly pulled it down. His breathing grew heavy as yours quickened with how the suit slowly opened revealing glimpses of your naked skin beneath. The rise and fall of your chest along with the sight of the valley of your breasts and hints of your body before him, made his throat dry.
He wanted to take his time but at the same time, his long infatuation that had turned to something more over the years made it difficult.
When the cold air kissed your bare skin, you felt your nipples pebble and harden against the fabric of the suit, making you want to rub your thighs together but that was impossible when San was knelt between your thighs.
“Can I keep going?” He asked you, pausing the pull of your zipper before it could go lower than your belly button. He searched for any uneasiness in your eyes but instead, he found such a sweet yet sinful look in them.
You nodded. “Y-yes, please.”
Gently, he helped you slip your arms out of the suit, his breath hitching at the sight of your bare pretty breasts bouncing free as he bunched the specialized Kevlar-like fabric at your waist. His palms were at least a micro-centimeter away from your skin. Almost afraid and hesitant to truly feel you. An assassin without their suit was just as deadly as them having one but with you, he felt as if without it, you were just a woman. A woman who wanted to be loved…a woman he loved.
Kissing you drove him crazy enough but to get to touch you? He’s going to crumble.
It seemed you had noticed his hesitation and driven by your silent desire, you took his hand and splayed fingers and pressed his palm over the middle of your chest, close to where your heart would be.
You didn’t say a word as his eyes snapped to meet yours. All it told him was that this was consensual, that you wanted him to touch you, and that he could keep going.
If this was truly yours and his last night in this world, none of you wanted to hold back.
“Sannie…” his heart stopped when you softly called out his name. Your eyes looked into his as if he brought you peace, there was no turmoil nor anxiety in them. The cold and dark blankness that they held when you’re on a mission or on Academy grounds was absent.
Right here, before him was just you. The young girl he once knew that the Academy caged and programmed to be a weapon in their beck and call, a woman who did not have the time to love or be loved, nor was allowed to. But if you were to tell him you were incapable of loving, he’d prove to you that you were wrong.
Maybe you didn’t know it then but the compassion you had shown him during your trainee days when he was nothing but the runt of the litter of kids with no future chosen by the Academy to be given a chance, that in its own way was love.
The way you stuck by him, took time to check if he was okay and to defend him from higher ranking assassins, even if it was platonic or more, it was love.
You slipped your fingers into his, intertwining them.
“Keep going.”
There was a hint of sadness in your smile despite the way you looked so longingly at him as if he were the warm shining sun.
He continued to unravel you. Gently, he rolled the fabric to slip past your hips. Despite your line of work, your skin was close to perfect in his eyes. No deep scars nor wounds that left a memory of your missions plus the Academy took good care of their favorites.
But the sight before him proved him wrong.
His heart dropped into his stomach and he felt your hand squeeze his.
Below your belly button and not fully hidden by the waistband of your black underwear, a long jagged scar curved along your lower abdomen. The scar was healed but it left its mark. It sickly smiled at him in a deeper shade than your complexion with pinkish hues.
“W-what is this?” He held your hip gently, his thumb caressing your hipbone afraid to touch that area skin, should you not like it.
He felt his heart break when you only looked at him sadly. “Y/N, w-what is this?” He croaked out hoarsely, his heart breaking when you looked at him that way and continued to hold his hand in yours.
“My graduation.”
The world stopped and he heard nothing but a dull ringing in his ears.
The Academy.
“Why didn’t you tell me?”
“Because it didn’t matter. Why should I speak of something that I could never get back.”
“D-don’t talk like that. Y/N you should’ve told me.”
You sat up, heart breaking when you heard his voice crack. San didn’t even realize that tears were falling from his eyes as he stared at that mocking smiling scar. Just when he thought the Academy couldn’t take any more from you, they took everything.
Well, almost everything. But not him. They were not taking him away from you. Never.
“Sannie, don’t cry.” You smiled, wiping his tears away. “I didn’t tell you 'cause I knew you’d cry.” You took a deep breath, finally telling your closest friend of so many years the secret you’ve kept from him. “This is why you should leave the Academy and live a life you truly deserve. You have a chance for a future you want. Mine…well…mine was taken from me. It was a silly dream I had when we were kids.”
“When we spent time around the towns and I’d see people getting married and having families, I thought I could have that. I thought I was going to marry you and have a family. At twelve years old.” You laughed softly at the childhood memory. “At twelve years old, I looked at you, my best friend, and thought ‘I’m going to marry San’ and that we’re going to be as happy as the families I’ve seen. That I would have a child and give them the life I never had…but then the Academy happened.”
San’s tears streamed down his handsome face and you held his face in your hands once more, making him look at you.
“I don’t want to think about that tonight. I don’t want to think about what I went through to stay alive.” You leaned down to kiss his jaw and your breath was hot against his ear as you uttered words that shattered his heart even more. “So don’t touch me like I’m made of glass. You can’t break something that’s already broken. Make me forget, Sannie.”
You kissed him again then took his hand that was on your hip and guided it to cup your breast, your body tingling and warming at the touch. The simple gesture told him one thing. Throw caution out the window. Nothing else mattered now except you and him. If both of you were going to die tomorrow, you both wanted to feel love and act on desires that both of you held back on.
Driven by the love he harbored for you for so long, he attacked your neck with heated kisses and caressed your bare torso with such a need to feel your skin.
Your warmth and your scent, he could die in it.
Sloppily, he licked and nibbled at the juncture of your neck and shoulder before going lower, and hungrily taking the soft peak of your breast into his hot mouth.
You gasped and moaned at the sudden and new sensation, your body tingling over and your hips mindlessly grinding on San’s thigh. You shivered at the spark of friction and loosely wrapped your arms around his head, your fingers combing through his hair as his tongue flicked and swirled over your sensitive nipple while his other hand gave your other breast attention. He squeezed and massaged them just as greedy as his mouth was latched onto your right tit.
Soon, clothes were haphazardly thrown away and you were on your back completely on display for San’s eyes and his eyes only. The coldness of the room was forgotten as your bodies began to burn with lust and yours continued to grow hotter as he kissed along your inner thigh, his slit cat-like predatory gaze never leaving your face.
Your thigh was hooked over his left shoulder and San took his time kissing your soft plush thighs, nipping and biting where he wanted and enjoying the way you squirmed and trembled. But when he came face to face with your pretty pink pussy before him, he felt like he could cum untouched.
His gaze was hot as he stared at your core and you wanted to close your thighs but it was impossible with San’s position. He rested his hand over your lower belly as he licked his lips.
“You’re dripping,” he said lowly, eying your slick pink folds and your little pulsing hole that pushed more arousal out the more he teased you. He brushed his thumb over your clit and your hips bucked.
Fuck, he swore to himself. You were so sensitive.
Biting his lip, he collected your arousal and messily spread it all over your cunt. You could feel the warm sticky slick over your skin and you only grew more needy for his touch. You’ve touched yourself plenty of times when you needed to…but it was different when it was someone else, it was different that it was San.
“Fuck,” he hissed softly, feeling how wet you were and how easily his thumb was able to circle around your sensitive clit, enjoying the reactions he was eliciting from you. “Does that feel good, sweetheart?”
You nodded, shamelessly.
“Have you ever been touched here?” He asked, wondering if you were like the other assassins who deal with their desires by sleeping with another assassin. If you answered yes, he’d be jealous. He’s already jealous at the thought of someone else being as close as he was to you right now.
But your answer was more than he expected.
“N-no. Just me.” You breathily replied, biting back a moan when he pressed a little more as he massaged your clit in slow languid circles.
“Yeah? Just you? All alone?”
“Mhm Hm.” You bit your lip, your hips bucking into his hand for more.
You were driving him crazy. He was imagining you touching yourself in your room. Pretty little hand in your panties playing with yourself underneath the covers and biting back your moans like you were right now.
“You know…there’s something better than just your fingers,” he inched closer, his breath fanning over your pussy, the heat of it making you clench around nothing. He hooked his arms underneath your thighs to hold you down and keep your hips still.
“Your fingers?” You guessed, blinking at him and watching his every move. You found it rather embarrassing that he was this close to your intimate area.
“Definitely,” he chuckled at your response. “But not that, sweetheart.” He kissed the top of your pubic bone. “Something even better.”
Before you could ask what, his pink tongue peeked from his lips and licked a long stripe from your dripping hole and up your clit. You moaned at the feeling, squirming in his hold. Not one second did his eyes leave yours, the intensity of them made you need him more, and when he slowly flicked his tongue around your clit, tasting you, the pleasure went straight to your head.
“A-ah, Sannie,” you gasped but it didn’t end there.
As he had done with your breast, he latched his hot lips onto your core and began tasting you.
San moaned against your pussy at the sweet taste of your cunt, slurping and hungrily licking at your arousal as if he didn’t want to let a single drop go to waste.
It was downright dirty. Pornographic.
He kissed and made out with your core like he had with your lips. You never knew that you could feel such mind-numbing pleasure like this. His tongue was so hot and his lips were so soft, and just when you thought it couldn’t get better, you felt the tip of his finger tease your entrance.
It was almost too much.
You gripped his dark hair and tugged when you felt him slip a digit inside of you. His finger was thicker than yours, longer too. A rush of arousal washed over you when you heard him moan against your pussy when you pulled his hair.
“You’re so wet, fuck. You taste so good.” He briefly left your clit then licked at the pearl before saying. “My finger slipped in so easily, sweetheart. I think you can take another one already. Can’t you?”
“Y-yes. San, please. I-I need more. Please.” You panted breathlessly. Just as you asked, he delivered.
He added another finger into your hole, slowly slipping them in and losing his fucking mind at how tight you were sucking his digits in. He could only imagine how heavenly it must feel when it was his cock instead.
“So fucking tight, sweetheart.” He bit his lip, slowly beginning to pump his fingers in and out of you, his fingers completely covered in your slick. “You like that, darling? Love how my fingers are filling you up?”
You nodded, gripping the mattress below you as your hips moved on their own, and words you’ve never thought you’d say out loud slipped past your lips. “W-want to feel you deeper. M-more please.”
San could only smile at your reaction before he latched his mouth again onto your clit while fingers curled inside of you. You swore at how easily he found that spot you desperately tried to find on your own in the privacy of your room. His fingers were thicker and your chaste walls welcomed them so easily. The way he touched you and pleasured you felt so good, you didn’t care about the lewd squelching sounds your pussy made as he fucked his fingers into you. You could even feel your arousal drip from your hole and onto the mattress.
His eyes were peacefully closed shut as he tasted you. It was as if he was savoring every single bit of you and this kind of attention was making a familiar warmth bloom in your chest.
“S-San, w-wait, I-I’m,” you stuttered out, feeling your core tighten, the familiar sensation of being on that edge far more intense than when you touched yourself alone.
“It’s okay, sweetheart. It’s okay,” he murmured against your core, releasing your overstimulated clit with a soft wet pop. “Cum for me. Be a good girl and cum for me.”
Something about what he said and how he flicked his tongue against your clit as his fingers mercilessly pumped and curled inside of you, sent you over the edge. You gasped as your hips trembled and your walls convulsed around his fingers, your climax making you shake and your mind go blank momentarily.
San hummed deeply, the vibration of the sound along with how he slowly lapped your release and moved his lips as he did, made some part of your brain melt.
He couldn’t get enough and he quite literally was acting as if this was his last meal on earth.
“S-Sannie, wait—ah!” He prolonged your organs with his lazy kisses and languid kitten licks.
Once he had gotten enough (though he doesn’t think he’ll ever get enough), he parted from your lower lips to look at you through hooded eyes full of hunger and lust. It made your heart race.
With his eyes locked on yours, he thought his two fingers that had been inside of your heat to his lips and licked your essence off of it, a sudden heat passing through your body at the visual.
“You taste like heaven, sweetheart.” He moaned deeply, taking his time to taste you on his fingers.
“H-how about you?” You asked, your voice breathy and higher than its usual tone.
He caressed your thighs, lovingly as you came down from your high. “What about me sweetheart?”
Your hands caressed his toned stomach, tracing the lines of his abs and stopping before the waistband of his briefs.
“Do I get to taste you?”
San’s cock throbbed at your question that sounded so innocent from your lips. He wants to make this all about you but you were making it difficult for him to not be selfish and focus on making you feel good.
Still lightheaded from your orgasm, you sat up and crawled to San, the man before you gulping at the visual of you on your knees and seeing the beautiful shape of your back, it was like looking at a cat. You knelt by him, meeting his height before placing your hands on his shoulders and moving him to sit on the mattress with his back against the wall.
“I want to taste you, Sannie.” You purred, sitting a top of your folded legs, his own legs spread to make room for you.
He raised a brow watching you, amused at your actions. Even like this, he looked so attractive.
San smiled softly at you and caressed your cheek as you looked at him with round wide eyes. “Are you sure, sweetheart?”
You nodded, experimentally teasing the imprint of his length in his briefs. His breath hitched at the mere touch of your fingertips, his excitement making his thighs tense.
“Teach me how?” You looked at him through your lashes and the sweet determined look you had turned him on even more.
You were rather shy that you asked him to show you but little did you know, that just sent his mind places. Was he really your first?
Curiously, you palmed his length making a shaky breath leave him. “Did that feel good Sannie?”
“F-fuck… y-yes. It felt good sweetheart.”
“Can I take it off?” You tugged at the waistband lightly and he nodded eagerly.
You pulled down his boxers and once the garment was down past his hips, his cock sprung free from its confines. It slapped against his hard abdomen and you felt your mouth water at the sight.
Not knowing what it’d do to him, you slowly wrapped your hand around his length to gauge his size and San hissed at the warmth of your soft palm. He was hot and stiff, and the pink head was glistening with a slick liquid. With your other hand, your fingertips spread his precum all over the bulbous round tip.
“Oh, sweetheart, you’re torturing me.” He groaned the more you massaged this sensitive tip.
You felt your core tingle at the sight of his furrowed brows and his parted lips as you touched him. You wanted to make him feel good too.
“What do you want me to do, Sannie?” Your voice was so sweet.
“F-fuck, baby, spit on it a-and then wrap your pretty hand around me, okay?” His hand gently cupped the back of your neck.
A little hesitant but doing as he said, you spat on his cock, and the dirty sound and act of it made his cock twitch. You were guessing that you should spread it around and when he hummed, it told you, you were doing something right.
“Such a good girl, sweetheart.” He cooed. “Now wrap your hand around me. Fuuuck. Just like that.”
Feeling excited with all the praise he was giving, you kissed his neck slowly, doing as he did to you earlier.
“M-move your hand up and down, sweetheart.”
“O-okay.”
Your saliva mixed with his precum gave lubrication for you to easily glide your hand up and down his shaft.
“That’s it, baby. That feels so good. Fuck.” He moaned. “Come here, let me kiss you.”
You do as he says and kiss with his, moving your lips with his, and your core clenched when you could taste a sweet yet slightly salty flavor on your lips. Was that you? The fact you were tasting yourself on his lips turned you on.
The two of you stayed like that; making out while your hand pumped his cock, feeling his girth and his length. You couldn’t help but wonder how he’d feel inside of you but you wanted to taste him first like you said.
You pulled away from his lips and they pouted at the loss of them but he couldn’t stay disappointed for long, not when your tongue just did a kitten lick on his sensitive tip.
“Fuck, sweetheart, are you really sure?” He moaned, not wanting to force you. He was happy enough that you had been jerking him off. You really didn’t have to return the favor if you didn’t want to.
“Mhm.” You hummed, following your instincts and taking his leaking tip in your mouth, while your hand continued to move up and down his shaft.
His taste made your head spin and your clit throb. You liked the taste of him, it was a little salty but it was just him.
“Shit-,” he threw his head back, his other hand gripping the mattress as you licked and suckled at his tip. “That feels so good. Fuck. Don’t stop. Such a good girl using your pretty mouth on me. Do I taste good?”
You hummed so cutely as a yes. God, he’d do anything for you. How were you this cute?
“Do you think you can take more of my cock in your mouth? You think you can take it?”
His dirty talk made you even wetter and you were sure that you were dripping at this point.
Could you take it? There was only one way to find out.
Breathing through your nose and flattening out your tongue, you slipped his cock deeper almost choking when the hot tip touched the back of your throat but you against your gag reflex and tried to mimic what your hand had been doing. You slowly moved your head up and down, bobbing rhythmically on his cock.
San moaned breathily. This was your first time taking cock in your mouth? “You’re a fucking natural, baby. Fuck. That feels good. You look so pretty like this. Could cum just watching you.”
What you couldn’t take in your mouth, you made up for with your hand, earning more moans from San. You liked this. You liked making him feel good. You liked having his cock inside your mouth, you wanted to taste more than his cock.
You wanted more.
“Fuck,” he swore when he felt you bravely take a little deeper, feeling the way the start of your throat constricted at the intrusion of his cock. “Sweetheart, if you keep doing that—,”
You bobbed your head faster, not caring that you were making such lewd slurping and sucking sounds. He had done the same for you and at that moment you understood why he had enjoyed tasting you.
San’s thighs began to clench and his core tightened further. His knuckles were turning white at how hard he was gripping the mattress in one hand while the other grabbed your ass, making you yelp and take more of him deeper in your throat, which pushed him over the edge.
There was a cute surprised squeak that came from you which was the cherry on top of him spilling his load inside your mouth. Your eyes widened as you felt his hot release go down your throat and they fluttered close as you savored the taste of him.
San was losing it when he felt your throat move as you swallowed his cum. He didn’t know you were going to do that. What’s making his head spin further and making his hazy orgasmic bliss last longer was how you kept him inside your mouth, just the tip, and licking the slit of his cock head.
You pulled away, his cock falling on his stomach, still hard and you sat so cutely in between his legs as he panting and coming down from his high.
You wiped the edge of your mouth and licked what was left of him on your lips.
“Sannie tastes good.”
You didn’t know you had said that out loud in such a soft manner that made San swoon.
San like a cat, pounced on you.
He was once again all over you. Your back was against the mattress as he found his place between your thighs. You eyed his cock, still hard and glistening from when it had been in your mouth. Your walls clenched when San wrapped his own hand around his pretty cock and pressed the head against your clit making you whimper.
San rubbed the tip of his cock through your slit, spreading your slick and coating himself with it. You were so drenched that it was driving him crazy, he wanted to bury his cock deep inside you so bad but when his eyes met the long scar smiling from one hip bone to the other. He wanted to take his time. For you.
“Y/N,” he said softly, holding your hips with care. Even though you told him that he couldn’t break what was broken, he wouldn’t want to think of breaking you. In fact, he wanted to make you feel full, whole, and complete. He wanted to care for you in a way you deserved. “Am I your first?”
The sudden question threw you off. It made you realize that he was going to be your first. Concepts like those shouldn’t matter to you especially since you didn’t have the time to think of such a thing.
“Y-yes…” you admitted, relaxing a little. “You’re the first person to ever kiss me too. I want you to be my first, Sannie.” Your heart was aching while your body burned for him. “And if this is our last night alive, I wouldn’t have imagined anyone else being my first and my last. I’m glad…it’s you.”
San didn’t know if this was the right time to say the three words he’d been dying to say to you for so long. “For me…” he slowly moved his hips, rubbing his length between your slick folds, making your face relax into that flushed blissful expression.
“It’s always been you.”
You didn’t have time to think or question what that meant. Not when the tip of his cock teased at your entrance, just pressing against it.
Slowly, he let the head pop inside your cunt, both of you gasping. The girth of his cock stretched you out more than you could ever with your two fingers and there was a slight sting as he entered, making you bite your lip and whimper.
But he was attentive.
San intertwined his fingers with yours while his other hand held your hip still as he slowly, little by little, inch by inch, pushed his cock deeper into your tight wet heat. The velvety warmth of your walls made his head spin and the way they hugged his cock was heaven. The carnal part inside of him wanted nothing more than to thrust deeply into you and have you falling apart for him.
“S-Sannie, m-more.”
He growled lowly. Despite this being your first time, the wetness of your heat made his cock slip in so easily. Both of you watched as his cock split your lower lips apart and how his length slowly disappeared into you. You were bewildered that San was inside of you. You never knew just how badly you wanted to be close to him until tonight.
The circumstances were dire, it was hopeless but you had him.
“I want to feel more.” You squeezed his hand as he pushed his hips a little further. “Y-you’re so thick.”
San must be dreaming.
You brought your free hand over your mouth as the sensation of being filled up was such a pleasure you’ve never felt before. It was too much and not enough at the same time.
“You’re taking me so well, sweetheart. You’re doing so well.”
He cooed and praised you for each inch you took of him and there was something about the heat of him inside you, spreading apart your chaste walls that made your thighs shiver as he bottomed out.
San let out a long exhale, cursing as he felt his whole length be snuggly embraced by your velvety warm walls. He could even feel your arousal coat him and drip out of your entrance. He was ascending. He was the closest he could ever get to the person he’s only ever seen as the love of his life.
You looked so beautiful before him. How could you be so bashful yet exuding such allure? Your hand squeezed his as you adjusted to his cock inside of you, he could even feel the way your walls squeeze and contracted as you did. Fuck. He was your first. The first man to ever have the privilege to be this close to you, to feel you, and to see you in a state so vulnerable that you hid from everyone.
“Sweetheart, are you okay?” San asked, massaging your hips to help you relax. You were squeezing him so tight. “Does it hurt?”
His sweet voice and the care in them made your heart crack. What did you do to deserve someone like Choi San?
“N-not really. It’s just…new.” You whimpered when the head of his cock that was in your mouth earlier was snug against your cervix. “I-I can feel you.”
That made San’s head spin. “Y-yeah?”
“Mhm.” You nodded, holding his hand and looking into his eyes. “I…feel…you.”
Each word held so much weight and emotion that San couldn’t stop himself from leaning down and crashing his lips on yours. He could feel you too and he loved the feeling of you. He drew his hips back just a little, slowly giving you shallow thrusts to get you used to him. You gasped at the sensation of his cock gliding and scraping your walls, the friction so sinfully and mind-numbingly good.
San continued to kiss you, his tongue delving into your warm wet mouth, the two of you kissing messily as his cock eased its way out of your walls leaving only the tip in. You squirmed. The first taste of the motion of his length inside you sparked a rush that felt addicting and when he easily slid back into you again, it confirmed that growing addiction.
“S-Sannie!” You cried out, arms wrapping around him, holding onto him as he stroked your walls deeply.
“F-fuck, Y/N, you feel so good.” He groaned, burying his face into your neck, kissing the spots he hadn’t marked with love bites.
Your legs wrapped around his waist, your lust mixing with greed as you needed more of the feeling that San was giving you. You’ve never felt so much in your time of being alive. It was new. It was something you never had before.
The deep passionate rolls of hips with every intention to make you feel pleasure, the hot kisses on your neck, the sweet nothings he’d whisper, and the gentle caresses on your body. It made you dizzy, you’ve never lost yourself in something so…euphoric.
As San continued to glide his cock in and out of your tight heat, with his forehead against your chest, his eyes met that scar on below your belly once more, his heart aching. Why did they take that away from you? It was so cruel of them.
His emotions were all mixed up. You two might not live to see another day after this night and the two of you acting on your emotions and passions that had been suppressed for so long were both overwhelming. Plus the truth of what happened to you during your Academy days hurt him.
All he knew was he wanted to you to feel all of him. To make you feel his love and desire for you with every touch, every kiss, and every strong drive of his hips.
The passion and the way you two had been showing it to one another became more carnal as the lust muddled both your brains with nothing but unspoken love and the need to just fuck.
San’s hips picked up their pace. He thrusted and drove into you so deeply, each scrape and glide of his length inside you made his fat cock head kiss your cervix and pound into that one spot that sent you shivering and moaning.
San liked those sounds of yours. Accompanied by the lewd wet squelching and the sound of skin slapping against skin, it was driving him crazy.
“You feel that, sweetheart?” He placed his palm just below where your scar was, where he was fucking you. “That’s me.”
“C-can feel you, Sannie! Oh god,” you cried out, nails digging into his back. You could feel him waking up every fiber of your being with pleasure. “Want to feel more of you. D-don’t stop, please. Want you. I want you.” You were rambling mindlessly too lost in the pleasure, too lost in the heat of his thick cock filling you up.
“I won’t stop, baby. Can’t stop. I need you so bad. You need me to right? Fuck,” he felt you squeeze him tighter. “I’ll make you feel good, Y/N.” He moved his palm lower to find your sensitive pearl all puffy and sticky with your arousal.
Your back arched into him as he massaged your clit.
“You look so beautiful,” he whispered, fucking you til you both get your fill. Even if you both came now, he doesn’t think he’ll have enough of you. He wanted to fuck you so passionately. He wanted to drink what he could of you as this might just be your last night together. “Are you close, sweetheart?”
“Y-yes!” You croaked out, panting with each thrust of his cock. “W-wanna cum, Sannie. P-please.”
“Don’t worry, pretty. I’ll make you cum. I’ll fucking make you cum.” He growled, his hips picking up their pace. Your mouth fell open. The new pace had his cock hitting your g-spot at such a rapid pace you couldn’t think at all. All you knew was you wanted him to keep fucking you.
“H-harder. Need to feel you deeper.” You whined, hugging him close and your words only made the man before you go feral.
The snap of his hips shook your whole body with pleasure that only crescendoed your bliss further into euphoria. That tight knot within your tummy was reaching its limit. With how San was moaning and groaning against your neck, and how his fingers on your clit glided so easily with your slick was sending you over the edge.
You chanted his name over and over so breathlessly, your nails digging deeper into San’s back.
Snap!
Your mouth fell open in a silent scream as your walls clamped down around San, your thighs and hips convulsing uncontrollably as pleasure swooped through your body. You couldn’t help the way your nails clawed down his back which made the man before you moan brokenly as his hips stilled and glued against you.
Heat began to fill your walls and your womb as you came hard. San’s thigh muscles were taut as he emptied what he could into you. It was driving him crazy. Your walls were sucking him in a way where his cum just kept flowing til he had nothing more to give you.
“S-Sa—,” you didn’t have to finish calling out for him before he leaned forward to capture your lips. The kiss was slow and lingering…it was gentle and deep.
“I’ve got you,” he said briefly leaving the kiss to take a moment to straighten his back to look at you before him.
You were glowing. Your beautiful skin was covered with a thin sheen of sweat that made you glisten beneath the moonlight and your face was flushed. Your eyes looked up at him hazily, blinking prettily as you were still in your high. His eyes then drifted to where the two of you were still connected. Your puffy lips were split around his cock and you couldn’t help but look down there too.
Slowly, he slid himself out inch by inch. You whimpered at the loss of fullness but when you saw the pink cock head slip out and his length slam against his abdomen coated in your slick and pearly white release? Your walls clenched around nothing. With his thumb, he pulled one of your lower lips gently to get a good look at your pink pussy and his eyes darkened once more when he saw his cum leak out your pulsing hole.
San spread his release all over your pussy, his cat-like eyes curious and staring deeply at where he ‘marked’ you in his way.
“M-more.”
Did he imagine that?
“S-Sannie,” you spread your lips apart for him, making him swallow the lump in his throat. His eyes went to your face, his head spinning when you looked at him with such want and need. Could you look at him like that forever? “M-more. Need to feel you more.”
With San….you never had to ask him twice.
With the same passion and desire as he did earlier if not more, he was on you again. This time the two of you didn’t care about being gentle. You two were desperate for one another. Utterly desperate.
Then you found yourself locked against San with his arm around your waist, your back pressing against his body as he fucked deeply into you without thought. Your bodies were sticky as your shared heat kept you both hot, the cold forgotten as he pounded into you.
You moaned over and over for him, the sound a beautiful melody to his ears.
“I-I don’t think I can stop.” He rasped against your ear, slamming his pelvis against your ass filling your cunt up to the brim with his cock. “I don’t want to stop,” San growled while you cried as he slammed particularly deep, the new position making him reach that spongy spot inside you so fucking easily.
He’s gonna make love to you til you both are absolutely spent. Til he was empty and til you fell apart and had enough of him.
In that little walled-off prison you two were in, the two of you indulged in ways you both could never have during your time in the Academy. Boundaries they programmed into you were broken, lines were crossed and two beating hearts were fully awakened…and for the first time, truly, alive.
Then…when it was done…when that night passed and dawn broke. Those two hearts remained in each other’s arms, embracing one another as they feared for what the morrow would bring.
Not knowing that San would have to keep the promise he kept you.
“You deserve more than this life. You should be able to live freely and to love freely. Leave all this behind. Leave me behind.”
But he wasn’t going to leave you behind.
He could never.
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-- feel free to scream in my askbox!
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timeslipcamp · 27 days ago
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obligatory theory about the kyklos and what i think is happening.
literally every time i finish an episode i go and jot notes down in my lil mental notebook of theories and laugh like yuri in his lab
spoilers through ep 15
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so i've seen this idea tossed out but no one really went in depth on why they thought it so i'm going to list off MY reasons why i thought this is what's happening.
fair warning: this is going to be long, i've got about five million thoughts on this and it's only going to get worse as more episodes get released. get comfy and grab a snack
i think mc and the ghouls are trapped in a time loop
it's a trope that when handled well can be really really cool, and with how many moving parts and ghouls there are to distract from what's happening, it's super plausible. the only reason i'm hesitant to say this is 100% what i think it is is because it's still only episode 16 and we know next to nothing about the clash and anything that happened last year. plus the game's only been out for a year, we've barely scratched the surface of the plot.
that being said, we're getting about 3-4 episodes per every couple months, which means by like episode 20-24 we'll be coming up on a year since mc was cursed. maybe. i'm bad at math. (EDIT: someone else did the math and it will probably be closer to 40 that we hit the year mark lmao) is the story going to be over then? i don't think so. i think the following chapters would follow us through the time loop as we finally work to solve it
if i had to guess, this is how i think the general timeline goes: mc, despite the ghouls best efforts and someones sacrificial jump into flames from a balcony, turns into the kyklos. to stop the teachers/school-aligned ghouls from killing her, someone sends her away--and accidentally sends her back in time instead. taiga, however, has been told by mc that if she were to turn, kill her before she hurts anyone. taiga goes back with her to stop her.
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crazy concept: the one eyed sleeping beauty murder was the trigger event. the kyklos has one large eye. this part is still muddy given that we literally don't know shit about any of this, but i think it wasn't a one eyed beauty that was killed, i think the one eyed beauty killed someone while those other ghouls happened to be present. we got the five suspects based on them either being in the wrong place at the wrong time or by reputation (a la alan and jiro.) i think this is how zenji died as well, but i have zero basis for that other than vibes.
future!taiga continues to chase the kyklos, runs into his past self and explains (or maybe he's always known, or maybe whatever's going on with his brain makes him able to remember every loop, OR something is actively working against him remembering all of it) past!taiga does something that triggers the clash, and eventually, the kyklos finds her way to mc on the train. the following chapters would then begin to follow mc at the beginning of the loop again
this is literally all me guessing. i'll make an updated post once we finally know more about the clash and the one eyed sleeping beauty murders. and literally everything else smh
another quick note before i forget: i do think it's interesting that everyone who lost a day to the casino anomaly had their memories replaced of a girl in a tower in the woods. rapunzel reference? orrrrrr in early versions of the sleeping beauty tale, she was said to be in a lonesome tower waiting for someone to wake her up. coincidence? probably! ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
anyways
"how did we end up here?"
SUPER compelling that this is one of the opening lines. the whole intro is generally a vague "humans avoiding darkness" spiel, but i do personally think its alluding more to the coming together and working as a team theme than an actual darkness. to me it feels like it's implying (based on the story so far) that working together is the light that can drive away the darkness (her curse)
one of my big things that made me wonder right at the beginning was how it almost immediately dropped the line "if we could do it all again" (paraphrasing). the whole theme about doing it again and would we do it again kinda made me think repetition was going to be a theme in the story, but once i got a few chapters in, i was definitely hurtling towards the time loop theory.
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mc starts off talking about how she's sad it's over and we come to see she's talking about a band breaking up, and one by one the group chat members leave until she's left alone with just mina.
now mina itself as a name is an interesting choice. it's a fairly international name with a couple different translations. one translation has it meaning love, one says it's the same word as a mockingbird (a bird that can imitate human sounds) and in japanese, mina is a name meaning lovely/beautiful while min-na is a term sometimes used to mean "all of you", like saying all yall in english. fun play on words there if the time loop theory is correct and the kyklos we see at the beginning is in fact mc (aka all of us)
mina's profile picture is also a red spider lily, commonly known in popular media as the death flower
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it's often planted in graveyards to ward off evil spirits and help guide those who have passed to the afterlife. another meaning for the flower is reincarnation: yet another implication of a cycle.
(it's also a popular flower in hanahaki disease fics, which is a fic trope where flowers bloom in the lungs of someone whose love isn't returned, but that's unrelated)
actually now that i'm really staring at that picture, it looks more like a red surprise lily, which is even funnier imo. apparently it's just a sister flower of the spider lily
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mina says it must be destiny and that she's been waiting to meet us. spooky. we haven't really seen any other anomalies do anything premeditated like that, they're all mainly reacting to their environment, other than mr long legs i guess. but his felt more like predatory i need to eat intent, not "i'm tracking down this specific person" type of deal. definitely correct me if i'm wrong on that, though. i'm super interested in the "intelligent" anomalies vs the reactive ones. i'll make a post on that later
i've seen a couple other posts talk about how kyklos means circle in greek (aka another point in the time loop basket) but it's also interesting to note that kyklos comes from kuklos, whose root word kukló was often used to describe something that encircles. broke out a couple of my old humanities research packets and found this:
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"a group of people...positioned around a central point"
whether that's intentional or not, i do think it is interesting that the whole time loop could be centered on this group of people that are positioned around a central point: the kyklos and mc. everything always revolving around the main character and the curse that started it all.
almost immediately after, mc is swiftly taken to darkwick and told that she'll die in a year (which we later find out is a lie) and sent off to live her life
taiga is the most suspicious person in the WORLD to me. fuck the traitor shit i wanna know what taiga knows
our brief introduction of him (and a scene on campus) tries to convince us he's insane
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fairly compelling
but it's in the small cut scenes we see with the other ghouls that really get me.
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TAIGA knows something!! the second one really gets me, especially in the context of a time loop, and even more so if taiga is aware of the loop. the second screenshot reads to me as either he's 1. about to make a deal with either haru or whatever he's summoning with a coin, or 2. he's like "fuck it, i've seen this loop a hundred times. there's ways where they survive and there's ways where they die. pick one, we'll try it again and see if it changes anything this time."
i don't think he's actually lost his mind. i think he's putting up an act to throw someone off his scent (namely the traitor and whoever the traitor is working with.) i also get the feeling, especially after rereading the auction chapter, that there's something actively working against taiga having all of his memories. it might be the pact he made with his demon, but i almost wonder if it's someone else's stigma or ability preventing it. we don't know what all the ghouls can do yet, or even the teachers.
maybe it's the time loop itself that's keeping taiga from keeping all the timelines straight. maybe he's done this so many times he doesn't know what's real anymore. additionally, if you pick him in the beginning, this is what he says:
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once again, i'm getting the vibes that he's trying to figure out what could possibly be different about this loop that might finally break us out of it.
anyways, those are my basic notes on why i think this is gonna center around a time loop. given that haku's flute can transport and subaru's stigma has to do with memories and we dont even know half of the stigmas yet, i think it's entirely possible. but we'll see!
feel free to comment your own thoughts on what's happening :) ask box and dms are always open
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spaceyaceface · 2 years ago
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Only In Dreams
Ominis Gaunt x f!Reader/MC
This fic was written based on the angst prompt the wonderful @applinsandoranges gave me!!! I had SUCH a great time writing this, thank you so so much lovely! There's definitely a lot of angst in here, but I am but a softy, and couldn't help but give it a happy ending :)
Summary: She spent her days in love with him, and her nights wishing they were together. But she knew it would never be---Ominis Gaunt had sworn off love for the sake of ending his family's legacy. She knew she wouldn't be an exception to that.
Prompt: “I’d rather sleep in all day ‘til I’m dead”
Word Count: 3.5k
Warnings: Angst
It hurt, being so in love with her best friend. 
It hurt even more when even sleep didn’t let her escape from it. 
She woke with a start, hand reaching up to brush over her lips, recalling the echo of his breath mingling with hers from just before she awoke. The first few times she’d had that dream she couldn’t help but shed a few tears. Now, though, she only released a shuddering breath and arose to begin her day. 
The dream was always the same. They were standing in some room—she wasn’t sure where, exactly, but that didn’t matter. All she saw was him. He smiled, and told her that he loved her. Then he leaned closer, closer—
And there it ended. 
Night after night, she lived through the same tormenting scenario, one she was absolutely certain was impossible. 
She had been in love with Ominis Gaunt since the summer after her sixth year when he came to visit her small flat in London. They had walked down the street, arm in arm under the flickering streetlights. When they had stopped on a bridge and he offered her his coat, she knew she was doomed. It had only gotten worse since then. Every innocent touch felt like fire. The rare laughs he gave when in the company of his closest friends made her stomach tumble end over end. And in the night, when she fell asleep thinking of him, he found his way into her dreams. 
Maybe they were nightmares. She didn’t know what to call them anymore. All she knew is that they were painful, showing the desires that could never be. 
Ominis had told her several times throughout their friendship that he planned on never marrying. It would be selfish of him, he insisted, dragging any undeserving person into the mess that was the Gaunts. To ask someone to bear that name—the possibility of children forced to have it—it was too much. No, he had told her. He couldn’t do that to anyone. Better not to love when he was certain it would result in nothing but continuing his family’s legacy of pain. 
Back before her feelings for him had fully come about, she had tried to argue against his stance. Ridiculous, she had told him. Why should their mistakes define whatever happiness you might find? But it was useless. When the subject came up after she had fallen like stones were tied to her feet she felt she couldn’t speak on the issue. Before, it had been for him. For his happiness. But suddenly, it felt like she was trying to convince him for her sake. 
She knew full well that she would not be an exception to his decision, as little as she cared about what the name Gaunt would mean if it ever became hers. 
As she finished dressing, she sat on her bed, closing her eyes and sighing. What she wouldn’t give to live in that dream. Where none of that mattered. Where he felt the same. Where that ache in her chest became a flame of excitement and hope. 
Just as she had every day for the past month, she walked down to the Great Hall, as if there was nothing wrong at all. 
Despite the pain of having what she wanted so near, she couldn’t help but seek out Ominis’s calming presence. She was a moth to his soothing flame, eager to hear his quiet voice as he whispered witty remarks, desperate to let her hand brush his as they walked. So when she entered the Great Hall and saw him talking to Sebastian, she smiled. 
His head tilted toward her as she approached, having long memorized the sound of her footsteps. His soft smile graced his lips. “I swear, you get here later and later every day. Soon enough you’ll be missing breakfast all together.”
She chuckled. “I’ll just have Sebastian help me nick something from the kitchens when I do.” 
Sebastian rolled his eyes. “Please. You know stealing from the kitchen is easier than anything. If you need help with that, you’re hopeless.” 
“Maybe I just wanted the company.”
“Are you suggesting Sebastian is good company?” Ominis said, smirking.
“I never said good or bad. He is entertaining, in the least.” 
Sebastian tore off part of the toast he’d been eating and threw it at her. “I don’t know why I talk to the two of you. There’s never a break from the torment.”
“Except right now,” Ominis said. “Off to Ancient Runes you go, unless you’d rather join us for History of Magic.”
He scoffed. “Never. I can’t believe the two of you still take that class. Voluntarily.” 
“It’s an interesting subject, Binns is just an awful professor,” she said.
Ominis shrugged. “I just take it for my beauty sleep.” 
“Merlin knows you need it,” Sebastian said, patting Ominis’s shoulder and starting down the hall. “I’ll see the two of you later.” 
She and Ominis began walking to class, one of the rituals they had together. She’d always enjoyed having this class with him, whether it was spent sharing not-so-quiet whispers or nodding off for a morning nap, it was always nice. 
And as she watched Ominis as he laid his head against his hand, she remembered just why she didn’t mind the nodding-off days. 
He looked so peaceful as he napped, his protected expression giving way to one of pure bliss. It always made her sad to think she saw that softness from him so rarely—it made her hate his family all the more for stealing that from him, like so much else. 
She didn’t know how long she sat, watching him sleep. She didn’t know how long it was until she dozed off herself. But suddenly, there she was, once again. 
All she could focus on was his face tilted down toward her, his hands grasping her own. The rest of the world around them was a blur—it didn’t matter. Not when he was there with her, grinning like a fool. 
“I should have told you ages ago,” he said. “I love you. More than anything.”
The words came so easily. “I love you, too.” 
He leaned forward, placing a hand on her cheek to help guide him. She would wake up any second now, she knew. She would open her eyes and—
His lips met hers. They were soft, gentle. Her head was spinning, heart pounding in her ears. She tilted her head just so—
The jostle on her shoulder catapulted her back to reality. Her breath was coming fast as she looked over at Ominis, his hand still on her arm. A quick glance around the near-empty classroom told her class had just ended. 
“Sorry to wake you, but it’s time to go,” Ominis said. 
He stood and offered his hand to her. Fighting warmth in her face, she took it, letting go quickly once she was on her feet. His brows furrowed. He seemed to have noticed the slight tremor in her hand. 
They walked down the hall, heading to their next lesson. She couldn’t look at him—not without seeing the image of him in her dream. She did her best to act normal, chatting with him softly as they went. 
But Ominis knew her too well. He stopped at the end of one of the corridors and turned toward her. “Are you alright? You’re acting… off.” 
She pressed her lips together. “I’m fine, Ominis.”
“You don’t seem fine,” he said softly, taking a step closer to her. She sucked in a sharp breath. “Did… did you have a nightmare, just now in class?”
Only he could see right through her like that. “No, not really. It was just a dream.”
“Just a dream?” He shifted his weight, shaking his head a bit. “I don’t think it qualifies as ‘just a dream’ if it’s left you in a state like this.”
“It was… it was a dream that couldn’t come true, alright?” she said softly. “I can’t explain any more than that.” 
“Maybe if you talked about it, it would help—”
“Ominis, please,” she said, voice pleading. “Drop it. I can’t talk about it.”
And drop it he did. 
He was so bloody kind. So damn respectful. It made her want to bawl her eyes out. 
The dreams only got worse in the coming days. She imagined the feeling of his lips on hers nearly every night, and then it progressed to more soft moments she had always been longing for—laying side by side in a field, hands intertwined, his arms wrapped around her as he pressed a kiss to her forehead—and then the worst of all. Ominis, standing down an aisle, soft music playing as she stepped toward him. 
That was the one that destroyed her. She woke up in tears, curling up in the corner of the bed and trying not to wake her dorm mates with her sobs. Of all the cruel things her mind could conjure up, that one stung like a knife to the heart, because there was nothing she wanted more than to devote herself completely to the man she loved so much. 
She thought about avoiding him for a while. See if it would get the dreams to stop. But each time she went someone, determined not to talk to him or look his way, there he was, a lighthouse shining out for her ship so lost at sea. He called her home to him, time after time, and she went, no matter how much it hurt. 
It was Sebastian who finally called her out for her strange behavior. She knew it had only been a matter of time. She was too anxious, too jumpy compared to normal. Shen her two friends would bicker, she would find herself lost in thought, only to be startled when one of them asked her a question. 
“What’s been going on with you?” Sebastian asked as the two of them settled on the floor of the Undercroft. “We’ve been worried. You’re not yourself.”
A million options of what to tell him ran through her head. But after just a moment or two, she finally settled on what to say—the truth. 
“I love him, Sebastian,” she admitted, voice barely above a whisper. Instinctively, she pulled her knees up to her chest, resting her head on them. “I love him so much, and I don’t…” The tears started coming, and once they began, she couldn’t stop them. Sobs worked their way up her throat, all of the aches she had built up for months finally letting loose. 
Sebastian rushed to comfort her, albeit a bit taken back by the outburst of emotion. He rubbed his hand over her back, trying to soothe her. “Hey—hey, it’s alright. You’ll be alright,” he said softly. 
She tried to regain control. It was difficult, but she focused on taking deep breaths. When Sebastian saw she had calmed down enough to talk once more, he let out a sigh. “You’re talking about Ominis?” 
She nodded, not trusting her voice. 
“Can I ask how long?” 
“Since he visited me last summer but… God, Sebastian, it’s only been getting worse.” She took a shuddering breath. “For weeks now, I’ve dreamed that he feels the same, even though I know he’ll never…” She bit her lip, eyes welling up once more. 
“A dream that couldn’t come true,” Sebastian said, sounding far off. Ominis had told him of his worries after History of Magic, of course. Now it all made sense. “I’m so sorry.” 
“I know it’ll never happen,” she said. “He made it very clear he has no intention to pursue anyone like that. I’ve accepted it.” 
She wished Sebastian could reassure her. Tell her no, you’ve got it all wrong, he’s mad for you. But they both knew their friend—that he had locked up his heart and thrown away the key, despite any and all protest from them. So Sebastian didn’t say empty words of ‘you never know’ or ‘it could work out’ or ‘you’ve still got a chance’. Instead, he looked at her with eyes full of sorrow, and offered a tight lipped smile. “Do you think it would help if you just told him?” 
“Maybe,” she admitted. “Then I could put it to rest. I could stop fooling myself that there could be a way to make things work.” She could stop dreaming about it.
Sebastian left. He promised he would find Ominis, send him down there to talk to her. She’d have a few minutes to gather her courage, to find the right words.
And then it’d be over. 
She could only hope it wouldn’t destroy their friendship—all the good they had built. She needed him, desperately, in any way she could have him. He was the anchor in her life. 
When the door to the Undercroft opened, she felt like she might suffocate. He called out her name. 
“Are you alright? Sebastian said you needed to talk, what’s going on?” His voice was on the verge of panic. It pulled at the most tender parts of her heart. In a moment, he stood in front of her, putting away his wand. “What’s happened?”
She closed her eyes, steeling herself up. “I’m fine, Ominis, I just needed to tell you something. Something I hope doesn’t ruin everything.” 
“Ruin…” His voice trailed off. “I’m… afraid I don’t follow.” 
“I love you, Ominis.” The words, the ones that she had locked away for so long, the ones she had swore to herself she would never utter, pierced the air with sudden sharpness. She watched Ominis’s expression wash away, an empty slate of utter shock overtaking it. “I love you. I… I needed you to know that. I’m sorry. I don’t expect anything from you. You’ve already told me you would never love another like this. I suppose my heart just couldn’t heed those warnings.”
He didn’t even seem to be breathing. His mouth opened slowly, as if trying to form a response, but closed again. 
She brushed her hand on his arm. “It’s ok. You don’t need to say anything. I just needed to put this all to rest. I hope…” her voice trembled. “I hope we can remain as friends.”
She left him alone in the Undercroft before she could start sobbing yet again. 
-
When Ominis entered the common room, he was an utter mess. 
Sebastian had waited up for him—he expected he would need to talk after everything happened. By the time Ominis finally came back, everyone else had gone off to bed. 
Ominis’s usually neat hair was disheveled from running his hands through it over and over again. His blazer was held bunched up in his arm, no care for the later wrinkles it was sure to have. The hand holding his wand in front of him was shaking terribly. 
“I take it she told you?” Sebastian said softly, clearly worried about the state of his friend. 
Ominis didn’t answer, dropping his coat on one of the sofas and pressing his hands to his face. 
“What happened? What did you say to her?” Sebastian asked. If this was how Ominis had fared after their conversation, he could only imagine how she was doing. 
“I didn’t say anything.” Ominis’s voice was quiet. Hollow. 
“You—hold on, she laid her heart out to you, and you didn’t say anything?” Sebastian stood,  folding his arms across his chest.
“What was I supposed to say, Sebastian?” Ominis said. “My mind went blank.”
“You tell her it’ll be alright!” Sebastian replied, anger edging its way into his voice. “You tell her that even if you don’t love her the same, you’ll still be there for her.” 
“I can’t lie to her, she’d see right through it,” Ominis said. 
“So you’re abandoning her, then?” Sebastian took a step closer to his friend. “You can’t handle knowing she cares so deeply for you, so you cut her off?”
“That’s not what I’d be lying about!” 
Ominis collapsed onto the sofa, head falling into his hands. The meaning of his words slowly sank in. 
“You love her, too?” 
His silence was enough of an answer. 
“Then why didn’t you tell her that?” Sebastian’s voice had lost all of its fury as he came to sit next to his friend. 
“How could I?” Ominis scoffed. “You know what I’ve always said. I don’t want to drag anyone into my mess of a family. I thought I could simply… not fall in love. It sounded easy enough. But she came along and…” He shook his head, sighing. “How could I ask her to be part of all of that?” 
“But you wouldn’t be,” Sebastian said. “You wouldn’t be asking her to be part of your family. You’d be asking her to be with you. I think she’s made it pretty clear she would say yes to that in a heartbeat.” 
“Sebastian, you don’t—”
“I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again. You deserve to find happiness. You’ve found it in her. Your bloodline shouldn’t determine that for you.” 
“I…” Ominis pressed his lips together. “I’ll think about it.”
Sebastian sighed. “I suppose that’s the best I’m going to get.” He stood, patting his friend on the shoulder. “I’m off to bed. If you have any sense in you, you’ll tell her first thing in the morning.” 
It was a good long while later when Ominis finally entered the dorm room. Even as he laid out on his bed, sleep evaded him. When the first bit of sunlight began to warm the room, Ominis pulled himself out of his mess of sheets. 
First thing in the morning it was. 
He didn’t even know if she would be awake yet, or if she would have been out of her dorm. But he couldn’t lay in his bed a moment longer. He’d search for her, for hours if he needed to, just to feel like he was doing something. 
Funny how she was at the first place he looked. 
She’d always been fond of the boathouse. She’d told him how some nights when she couldn’t sleep, she’d sit out there to look out at the stars. It was always quiet there, just the lapping of gentle waves from the lake and a soft breeze. She was leaning against the railing of the dock, his wand told him, staring out over the water. 
“I thought you might be out here.” 
She didn’t respond, but patted the railing beside her, an invitation to join her. He put his wand away and settled where she’d indicated. He took in a deep breath through his nose, letting the fresh scent of pine carried over the lake soothe him. 
“It’s a lovely sunrise,” she said softly. 
He was sure it was. He could feel it—the growing warmth of the early morning. “I came to apologize,” he said.
“You don’t need to do that,” she said. “You can’t help if you don’t feel the same. Please don’t feel bad about it, Ominis.” 
“But I—that’s not what I’m apologizing for.” He took a deep breath, preparing himself. “I didn’t say a word last night. That was awful of me. To leave you in the dark on the thoughts running through my head. I can’t imagine what this night has been like for you, it was tormenting me, thinking of how it must have made you feel.” 
He heard a slight movement from her, an inhaling breath that told him she was about to respond. “Please,” he said, interrupting her before she could speak. “Please, let me finish. I need you to know exactly how I feel.” 
She stayed quiet. He willed himself to go on. “When you told me you loved me, I… I was afraid. You were right. I had always been determined not to fall in love, not to allow myself those feelings. But then I met you, and it made me question everything.” He felt her attention trained fully on him. “Before I knew it, I was in love with you. How could I have expected anything less? But I was still so caught up in my family, in the legacy they’ve left, how I could never ask you to be a part of it. You deserve so much better than all of it.”
He turned his head, facing toward her. “But I can’t let them loom over me forever. Not when it keeps me from what I want most. I love you. If you’ll have me, I am yours.” 
He didn’t have a chance to prepare himself for the way she threw herself on him. The way his arms wrapped tightly around her waist as he fell was pure instinct. The two of them tumbled to the pier, and he couldn’t even think to feel any pain over the sound of her joyful laughs. 
They sat up. One arm was still around her waist, and her own were thrown over his shoulders. Her nose buried itself right by the crook of his neck, the warm breath of her laughs tickling him. He couldn’t help his own laughter as it bubbled out of him. The months—years of aching, of wanting, of waiting, slipping away in an instant. 
She pulled her face back, and he could feel her eyes tracing over him. “I love you,” she said softly, smile in her voice. “I love you more than anything.”
He leaned forward and pressed his lips to hers, and all she could think was how much better it was than her dreams.
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otomeorangejuice · 2 months ago
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The last post I reblogged sent me on a spiral so here's how all the LADS LIs are nerds.
Zayne: He's a surgeon, that went through med school. Next.
Jk. Definitely the kinda guy to tell you random facts about the body, forgetting how gross some of them are and getting really embarrassed when his medical nerd talk puts you off your dinner. Loves explaining things whether it's his job or weird things about the human body. Tbh if he wasn't a doctor he'd probs be a teacher. Also ik it's his job but the lab coat SCREAMS nerd.
Caleb: military pilot with gravity powers, NERD. His fave subjects in school were probably physics and maths. Can name pretty much any aircraft at a glance and will yap to you about physics theories and the inner working of his favourite planes if you let him.
Everybody except those closest to him thinks he's just smart and cool but MC, Zayne and Gideon know that he's a chronic nerd that shows his affection by yapping at you about how cool planes are.
Rafayel: Art nerd. Now I don't think he'd care much about human art history overall, although I do feel he'd have a soft spot for the likes of Impressionism. But he's a nerd about the craft, the materials. He canonically creates his own pigments from seashells and such (which as a fellow art nerd I find so cool) but I personally believe he's probably experimented with trying to get natural pigments from all sorts of things.
This man is a colour theory girlie and he will ramble on to anyone about specific pigments and how he's aiming to achieve them. Thomas can pretty much rattle off the way he works by memory and sometimes finds himself looking at different things and wondering if that will give Rafayel the shade he's looking for. He low-key hates it but he tells himself it's for the good of the exhibitions and the art scene at the end of the day.
Sylus: Now I know we all joke that he's an old man but personally I think he's both a music and tech nerd. Like every person who knows about technology only trusts it so much (Catch him hating how much AI junk is infecting our lives ATM) plus Mephisto exists, like I think his tech parts are Sylus' doing. He's also a nerd about weapons and mostly collects them for fun only having a few that he actually uses for combat while overall preferring to use his fists and his evol.
Now he can't play music to save his life but he has the best audio systems money can buy, he has several record players, some vintage, some modern and he collects all sorts of vintage music paraphernalia. (Catch him having one of Eddie Van Halen's guitars on display). He canonically likes the Beatles (there's a pile of records as a decoration for his room on one of them is labeled Beatles) so I think he'd be a classic rock fan (Fits his vibe) but he still enjoys classical and opera
Xavier: Now Xavier is the only one who I don't think is a nerd. He's worse. This man is a gamer. From old school Nintendo to the newest VR releases he's played a good mix of everything. Personally I feel like he leans towards cozy games, has the cutest animal crossing island and the most impressive farm on stardew valley. Has definitely made himself and MC in the Sims (and then made Charlie and removed the ladder while he was in the pool). But he's also a god at the likes of the Bloodborne series. If he's feeling particularly jealous or pent up a few rounds of bashing bosses on Elden Ring will make him feel better. Also don't try playing a fighting game with him, he'll wreck you at Street Fighter.
And there we are the nerd (and gamer) squad.
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tokutaiseichan · 11 months ago
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I’ve pointed this out before but so far, Hotarubi is the only chapter where a Like Dove never made any appearances. Thanks to Taiga, we know that Like Dove is probably some kind of a spying device and everything points to the possibility that its duty is to monitor missions involving ghouls.
Yet it never made an appearance during the course of Hotarubi’s mission. Why is that? At first, I thought it’s perhaps because Taiga had killed and eaten the one that appeared during the Sinostra chapter. In the first place, we never found out if there are more than one Like Dove. It’s an anomaly—and a rare one at that. It might be the only one or maybe not.
But then I started thinking: what if the reason a Like Dove didn’t appear to monitor the ghouls’ mission this time is because they already have an “Insider” involved in the mission?
Zenji is automatically out. My man’s dead and Darkwick doesn't even know his ghost is still wandering around. Subaru? Makes sense since he has already lied to everyone before. What’s another secret? But after all that happened at the Ultio prison and considering his personality, I feel like what he confessed that time was everything he was involved with. Subaru’s awful at lying and hiding things, if he’s the spy he’d be a bit more obvious and feel even more guilty. So hmm… I wonder who we’re left with……
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Remember how during that one time MC was trying to escape again, Haku was the one who just conveniently showed up and successfully convinced her to not defy Darkwick anymore?
Sure, we can see it as simply a considerate gesture of a senior looking after his anxious junior. Especially when it's so blatantly implied later that he had experienced the consequences of going against the rules. Still, the timing is just… too perfect…
MC trying to escape → Bumped into Rui who's about to head to a mission → Haku suddenly appeared (Rui: “But Moby said no one usually rides around this time of the day~”) → Haku scolded both MC & Rui一brought up the clause of disciplinary actions if one were to do anything funny during missions and reminded Rui of his standing (Haku: “You know it's even worse if you're the one she's with, right?”) → Haku got MC away from Rui → Haku reassured MC and convinced her to stay at Darkwick to break her curse first instead of running away (like what he did before?)
It's almost as if he was purposely sent there for damage control.
“I'll keep this incident a secret from the Academy,” when the reason MC can't even escape in the first place is because Darkwick already knows what she's trying to do? Yeah, right. If you have tried to run away before, you'd know Darkwick has eyes everywhere.
I also found his responses from chapter 2 of his Personal Story rather interesting.
If MC thanked him → “…You shouldn't put too much stock in what I said, you know.” (He acts like the ever dependable and reassuring senior to MC but when she expressed genuine gratitude, he immediately backed off. Does he feel guilty because of how MC seems to always trust his words now? Because he’s keeping something from her?)
If MC shook her head → “Looking at you trying so hard made me realize how underhanded I am.” (Now he just sounds so bitter here…)
There's also the bait and switch with Hotarubi.
During Sinostra, MC found out the existence of a spy among the ghouls. And immediately at Hotarubi early chapters, Moby told her that the Hotarubi ghouls are hiding something. This planted seeds of doubt in MC一she thought one of them might be related to the spy. But at the end of the book, it was… in a way, disproven.
The secret they kept was Zenji's existence一for Haku & Zenji一and Subaru's mission regarding Lyca and his true stigma. This, ironically, leads up to MC being much more determined to trust the ghouls and be more wary about the Academy and Institute一even more than she originally did.
The reason I brought this up? Because the narrative has now painted Hotarubi as the “innocent” house. They made us (both MC & the readers) think how the ghouls over there are just trying their damn best to protect their friends… so that you'd suspect it the least for housing any spy (whom, in Taiga's words, is supposedly trying to screw other ghouls over). They made it seem like Hotarubi must've shown all their cards by now and gave us a sense of… relief? In a way.
(Obviously, there's still the mystery of Haku's dorm transfer. But that's for another day…)
Last but not the least, I'll bring you Haku's last words he told MC before jumping into the fire:
EN: Sorry, I guess I couldn't be the guy you wanted me to be. Ha ha… Don't look like that. Never lost faith in me, did you?
JP: ……すまんね。おまえさんの期待に、応えられんかったわ。はは……そんな顔しなさんな。最後におれを信じてくれて、ありがとね (Direct, almost word-to-word tl: ……Sorry. Looks like I couldn't meet your expectations. Haha…… Don't make that face. Thanks, for trusting me even at the bitter end.)
“Thanks for trusting me to the end,” are you Implying MC has reasons to lose her faith in you, Mister Haku Kusanagi? 🤔🤨
This is probably just me reaching but, has anyone noticed how “trust” seems to be a recurring theme with MC and Haku in particular? “Trust me. You'll be fine here,” and “If you need any help, I'm always happy to lend you a hand,” but also, “Don’t take what I said too seriously.” Which is it???
Anway, since Obscuary is just around the corner, I just wanna say that: 
1) If a Love Dove doesn't appear then it means I'm just looking too much into things and that the reason it doesn't appear is simply because Taiga has killed the one during Sinostra. And everything I wrote up to this point are hogwash.
2) If a Love Dove does appear again, I'll add +1 sus point to Haku.
“Why are you so suspicious of Haku anyway?” Years of watching anime and reading manga/visual novels/etc has taught me that you should always be wary of the sawayaka oniisan type. =w=)b
If you read until this point then thank you for giving my 2 a.m. rambles a chance! But please keep in mind that they don't call me Detective Reaching #2 for nothing. 🤧 For now, I'm going to log off so 🫡 Ciao!
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elizaleclerc · 1 year ago
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nobody else matters ❣️
charles leclerc x reader
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summary: fem mc driver teases charles when they sneak off during media day <3 (a little 18+)
author’s note: thx for the love on my first post! feel free to message me w ideas :)
song: les by childish gambino
word count: 1.5k
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The blistering sun beat down on you like a relentless hammer, its rays penetrating even the thick driver suit that clung to your body. Every step felt like walking through molten lava as you made your way through the crowd of the Miami paddock. The heat was suffocating, but you knew it would only get worse once you were inside the cockpit of your car, racing at top speeds.
Adjusting the snug neck strap of your navy blue Red Bull suit, you took a moment to fluff out your hair and reapply some makeup to combat the sweat-inducing temperatures. It was media day, and there were endless photos and interviews to be taken throughout the circuit. Red Bull's social media manager was in charge of guiding both you and Max around to various games and activities designed to showcase not just your driving skills, but also your personality off the track. From trivia challenges to racing on bouncy balls, each game added its own layer of entertainment for fans and media alike. And between all the fun, there were also professional photoshoots scattered throughout the day, capturing every angle of you and Max in your sleek suits against the vibrant backdrop of the race track.
In the high-stakes world of Formula One racing, Red Bull's main rival was none other than the prestigious Ferrari team. But for Max, it wasn't just about winning on the track - he also harbored a deep hatred for their lead driver, Charles Leclerc. Little did Max know that you, his own teammate, had been carrying on a secret romance with Charles for months now. The thrill and danger of sneaking around in the paddock, hiding your love from the prying eyes of media and fellow drivers, only added to the passion between you and Charles. He consumed your every thought, igniting a fiery desire that burned hotter than the scorching Miami sun.
Charles had a way of affecting your mood, even when he wasn't physically present. Whenever you were apart, there was a subtle shift in the air, as if a piece of you was missing. As a popular driver, Charles was no stranger to media attention, and despite your best efforts to keep your relationship under wraps, rumors still swirled about the two of you being more than just colleagues. But it was no secret how your face lit up whenever he was near, and how his own expression mirrored yours. In each other's company, it was as if the world melted away and all that mattered was the connection between you. Charles had become your everything - always checking in on you before every race and worrying over even the smallest of crashes. You were each other's constant support and strength amidst the chaos of the racing world.
Despite the exhilaration of keeping your forbidden romance with a rival driver hidden from the public eye, Charles's contract with Ferrari was set to expire at the end of this season. This presented him with the opportunity to switch teams and potentially join you at Red Bull. You had pleaded with him multiple times, urging him to take Max's place so that the two of you could finally race together. But Charles was adamant about wanting you by his side at Ferrari, making it a constant battle between your conflicting desires. This impasse seemed never ending, both of you refusing to budge from your positions, determined to make the best decision for yourselves and your racing careers.
Beads of sweat lingered on your flushed forehead as you wrapped up another exhilarating game outdoors for the media with Max. Your body was craving for a break from the scorching heat, and so you decided to make your way back to your driver room in the paddock.
You unzipped your tight driver suit, feeling instant relief as the cool air hit your damp skin. The thin white fireproof fabric clung to your body and provided some much-needed respite from the intense heat. As you opened the door to your driver room, it swung shut behind you, strong arms wrapping around your waist and soft lips pressing against yours. Charles' skin was glistening with sweat under the dim light, but the fiery passion and love between the two of you set the room ablaze.
Every time his hands touched your skin, it felt like fire spreading through your veins. His hot breath against your neck sent shivers down your spine as he whispered desperately, "God, I've missed you." You couldn't help but smile into his next kiss, knowing the effect you had on him.
"It's only been a few hours, darling" you teased, but secretly thrilled at his level of desire.
"You know I crave you all the time, mon amour," he murmured in a husky voice that made your whole body quiver with anticipation. As his hand trailed lower, you could feel yourself getting more and more aroused.
Charles noticed your heightened state and flashed a devilish grin. "How long is your break?" he asked mischievously.
You shook your head, trying to suppress a giggle. "No, we can't. Not here, are you insane?" But the thought of being caught only added to the thrill. Never in your wildest dreams did you imagine giving in to such intense passion in the cramped quarters of your driver's room. And yet, the danger only fueled your desire. Outside, people were milling around the paddock, completely unaware of the fiery passion unfolding just feet away from them.
“Please, I need you,” he begged, his voice desperate and cracking. You couldn't resist the sight of him like this – tall and muscular with a slight sheen of sweat on his forehead. His eyes searched yours, pleading for you to fulfill his desires.
A smirk played on your lips as you leaned in closer, your own body buzzing with anticipation. “Oh baby,” you purred, running your fingers through his dark hair. “You know I can't resist when you beg like that.” Your hands trailed down his chest, undoing his driver's suit with practiced ease.
“Let me please you,” you whispered, your voice dripping with desire. And without hesitation, Charles was putty in your hands.
You pressed against him, feeling the heat and power emanating from his body. Your lips found their way to his neck, leaving a trail of passionate kisses and gentle bites. With each one, his breath grew heavier and his grip on you tighter.
Your hand slipped under the waistband of his pants, finding him already hardened with need. He let out a low moan as your touch sent shivers down his spine. And as your fingers explored further down, he could barely contain himself – caught between wanting more and wanting to hold onto this moment forever.
You trailed your fingers along his length, eliciting a deep groan from his throat. Your lips brushed against his ear as you asked, "How does that feel, baby?" He responded with a low moan and you continued to palm him, relishing in the way he melted under your touch.
His head tilted back and you took advantage of the exposed skin on his neck, peppering it with kisses while your hand worked its magic. As his breathing became more erratic and you could tell he was close, you suddenly stopped.
"What- what are you doing?" He questioned, confusion evident in his voice.
A devilish grin spread across your face as you whispered in his ear, "Once you tell me you want to drive in navy blue, we can do things like this more often."
He pulled back, his intense gaze filled with passionate anger and desire. "Oh mon amour, we both know you look better in red," he growled lowly.
Your bodies were mere inches apart, the heat between you building into a fiery intensity. He leaned in to kiss you again, your movements seamlessly meshing together. As he pulled away, you couldn't help but notice that he was still visibly aroused in his suit.
"Sit here for a moment and compose yourself. Slip out without getting caught," you whispered teasingly, a sly smile on your lips. You quickly zipped up your own suit and left your driver's room.
Stepping back into the warm air outside, you took a deep breath and grabbed a water bottle to cool your racing heart. A sense of pride swelled within you as you walked away from Charles, leaving him hanging with unfulfilled desire.
Little did you know, as you returned to Max and Red Bull's social media manager to prepare for the upcoming photo ops, that a stray worker had captured Charles leaving your room on their phone camera...
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glitch-but-ya · 1 month ago
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Just finished reading your Caleb one shot, silken chains and I just wanna rant a bit bc of how good it is (pls feel free to ignore me if u don't feel comfy to answer. Trumblr being annoying bc I can't message or even reply to a post anymore sobs)
Man at first I was doubting my eyes cause 31k one shot in Tumblr isn't quite something you'd find easily. Saw the yandere warning but think to myself, "I mean what's the worse it can be?"
AND I AM?? GRIPPING ON MY CHAIR. I literally have no words– just speechless over the way you have written him, written the mc.
Coming from a psychology student myself, I just enjoyed sooo much how you explain the way mc brain works. How it feels we're one step further trying to cover this mystery while Caleb isn't even there, like of course he isn't?? It's still a part of his plan somehow, and I just??
10/10 gonna follow you and probably reread it just for trying to dissect every words there cause legit think mc can outsmart him but nah ahaha.
ANYWY THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THIS FOOD WHOOO, haven't find much really dark psychological story about his brain (I wanna open his head and study it I swear to God). So I'm just 🙇‍♀️🙇‍♀️🙇‍♀️
- 🐰
THANK YOU ANON!! I appreciate it sm😭
I really enjoy asks like these so don’t worry!!
(Brace yourself for a long yap session)
I’m so glad a psychology student enjoyed my work. Honestly, while writing this, I was so afraid that a psychology student may read this and wheeze at how inaccurate everything is😭 I did some research to ensure I get things right (for the most part) because I was afraid I’d end up writing something corny instead of an actual ‘psychological thriller/horror’. I’m very interested in psychology myself. I have been ever since I was a teen. I love writing psychological thrillers as much as I enjoy penning philosophical stories (two very differing topics to be interested in, I know, but to me, they’re very similar). And that’s technically what prompted me to write this fic!! :3
I feel like tumblr has a lack of good, long Caleb fics and just long fics in general, so I wanted to be (or at least, I attempted to be) the one to write it!! I also think tumblr has a lack of genuine psychological thrillers which aren’t just romanticism of yandere/dark romance tropes (nothing wrong with enjoying those types of content, it’s just that the romanticism often throws away the fear of it all— the dread of being wanted obsessively by a mentally unstable individual, and instead focus on romance. It’s just a personal criticism of mine which may not align with others).
Writing Reader was incredibly tough. There were so many unwanted variables at play that just curating her personality was an arduous task that made me want to delete the whole fic and rewrite it (I didn’t, thank God). Your usual criminologist would be completely objective and unfazed and to a certain extent, reader is exactly that, but she’s also soft at heart and she is especially emotional regarding this case with Caleb due to her suppressed feelings for him and the importance he has in her life. That conflicts greatly with her professional side and was just, in general, really tough to write.
(I sent like a 20 minute yap to my friend just crying over this problem😭)
But I’m glad I managed to write her in a way that pleases you all! And yeah, in general, I’m really grateful people like my fic enough to leave asks, replies, and comments on reblogs! I’ve been having a horrible time the past few days, and one of the only things keeping me afloat are these kind comments💕
Thank you, 🐰 anon!
(SORRY FOR YAPPING)
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