#but at a fundamental level the anime proves time and time again that the writers are just fully misogynists

[centi-pedve]

not to be melodramatic and an Irredeemable Media Guy but we're still so mad about jobless reincarnation. like the release of that anime was super important because it helped us find out which of the anituber male feminists we liked were actually full on posers (all of them.) like yeah we should have seen it coming that these people have no actual literacy within the realm of misogyny in media and just go "panty shots of 12 year old girl bad" over and over because the moment the misogyny pretends to be deep and introspective and looks pretty suddenly it's a Masterpiece. like we hate to judge people for their tastes but we're making an exception. if you think jobless reincarnation is unironically a masterpiece we do not like you

[sigmaleph]

@serinemolecule asked me for hot takes on this 2006 article on Argentinian food, which I am now reorganising into a proper post for y'all's consumption. you're welcome.

First of all: the titular thesis that you should eat two steaks a day. I am forced to clarify that as 'should's go you should eat zero steaks a day, but this is ethical rather dietary advice and I don't follow it as well as I should, so, y'know. I would engage with this on the level it was stated, but I actually have no opinion on it. Moving on...

Argentine beef really is extraordinary. Almost all of this has to do with how the cows are raised. There are no factory feedlots in Argentina; the animals still eat pampas grass their whole lives, in open pasture, and not the chicken droppings and feathers mixed with corn that pass for animal feed in the United States.

This is, as it happens, completely false. There absolutely is plenty of feedlot beef being eaten in Argentina, and this was also the case back when this article was written. There's grass-fed beef too, and maybe the writer structured their life around only eating those, but the claim that there are no feedlots is just not true.

if you let them make the call, you get a two-inch thick of meat[...]The Argentine steak stands alone, towering three inches over the plate,[...]This gorgeous specimen is called a lomito; it's a standard lunchtime steak, clearly so thin that the Argentines are embarrassed to send it out into the world without a protective wrapping of ham and cheese

I have no idea what their obsession with steak thickness is; meat exists at various levels of thick and thin to suit various tastes. If you like yours thick that's fine but quit the projecting, y'know.

As you might expect, vegetarians will have a somewhat rough time here. For most people in Argentina, a vegetarian is something you eat. One's diet will accordingly lean heavily on pastas, gnocchi, salads, and (for the less squeamish ) fish. Vegans will not survive in Argentina.

This is, unfortunately, true (well, hyperbole, but). Rinna had a rather bad time trying to find vegan food when fae came over for visits. The situation is improving slowly, at least.

The homemade cookies bought in the minimarket downstairs taste of steak. [picture of alfajores de maicena[

Jesus. Find somewhere better to buy your snacks.

It should be no surprise that the land of beef also has excellent milk and butter. The milk comes in plastic bags that would give any American marketing department a heart attack. They proudly advertise "GUARANTEED 100% BRUCELLOSIS AND HOOF-AND-MOUTH FREE". One brand even brags that its bacteria count never exceeds 100,000 per mL, and prints daily statistics to prove it (only 82,000 bacteria/mL on Monday! mmm!).

Are you under the impression American milk doesn't contain bacteria and that when it spoils it's because of the molecules' sheer willpower? Or do you just object to the reminder that they exist?

This menu is delicious, but with rare exceptions it is all you are going to get. People coming for more than a few weeks are advised to bring a discreet bottle of Tabasco sauce.

Eat at better restaurants.

With any order from the master menu comes the Bread Basket, which should be treated as you would treat a basket of wax fruit, that is, as a purely decorative ornament. It is considered bad form to actually eat anything from Bread Basket

What are you talking about. Do all your dining companions just suck, eat some bread.

Dulce de leche is a culinary cry for help. It says "save us, we are baffled and alone in the kitchen, we don't know what to do for dessert and we're going to boil condensed milk and sugar together until help arrives". This cloying dessert tar is so impossibly sweet that you wish you were ten years old again, just so you could actually enjoy it. It is everywhere. There is a special dulce de leche shelf in the supermarket dairy case, and the containers go up to a liter in size. Even the churros are stuffed with it - the churros, Montresor!

It is rare that I feel insulted for the sake of my country, but this? How dare you.

Yes, of course we fill churros with dulce de leche; the real question is why anyone doesn't, short of dietary restrictions. Finding out that people do otherwise was like learning that in other countries, "sandwich" just means two slices of bread. Live a little. Eat a real godsdamned churro.

I spent a considerable amount of time trying to figure out how meals work in Argentina, and they remain a mystery to me. Dinner is clear enough: people tend to go to restaurants beginning at ten o'clock (for those with small children), with the main rush around eleven, and dinner is pretty much over at one or so in the morning. And breakfast - or rather, its absence - follows as a logical consequence of eating a steak the size of a beagle at midnight. But I have yet to figure out whether people eat some kind of meal in the afternoon, and if so, when.

At... noon? Like. We eat lunch. Usually somewhere around 12:00. I am eating lunch right now, and I have done so essentially every day of my life. This is just baffling.

I've come to think the culprit in the missing Argentine lunch scene is yerba mate.

how.

Where the ignorant foreigner may see just another kind of herbal tea (yerba mate is a very unassuming shrub that grows in the northern parts of the country) the Argentine sees a taste treat of unimaginable subtlety, and a tonic for all his problems. The Wikipedia article on proper mate preparation should give you a warning of the level of obsessiveness attainable here (the Urugayans are even worse). To the virgin palate, mate tastes like green tea mixed with grass clippings. The beverage is traditionally drunk out of a little gourd, through a metal straw called a bombilla, with hot (but not boiling!!) water poured into it (without wetting the surface!! clockwise!!) from a thermos.

Yeah, this is accurate. Well, not the clockwise part, never heard anyone complain about that and I can't imagine it mattering.

What distinguishes mate from coffee and tea is the social context - two or more people share a gourd, with a designated pourer in charge of refilling it with hot water after each turn. The ritual is low-fuss but indispensible. You can buy mate gourds and thermoses in any grocery store, and get your thermos filled with hot water at any convenience store or gas station, but you will never see mate served in restaurants or sold in little disposable paper gourds, to go. it's not that people refuse to drink mate alone - anyone working a solitary shift will have a gourd in hand - but that the concept of being served mate by someone who does not share it with you seems impossible.

This is also true. Attempts have been made to sell to-go mate but it's never very popular, the social ritual is important. Also unfortunately a disease vector, I haven't had any mate in a year and a half.

Mate aficionados will tell you that mate contains a special compound, mateine, that serves as a tonic and mild stimulant, promoting alertness without making it hard to sleep, reducing fatigue and appetite, helping the digestion and serving as a mild diuretic. Scientists will tell you that mateine bears a suspicious resemblance to a chemical called caffeine. Mate aficionados will then grow indignant, explaining that mateine is really a stereoisomer (mirror image) of caffeine, with different effects, which will in turn irritate the scientists, who will snap that caffeine doesn't have a chiral center, so it can't have a distinguishable mirror image, and why don't the mate aficionados just put a sock in it.

The first part of this is true; some people definitely think "mateine" is different from caffeine and it absolutely isn't. Never heard the stereoisomer claim before but googling it does confirm some people say so.

still have no idea what any of this has to do with lunch, though. I promise you nobody skips lunch because mate is just too filling.

The wine here is very good (something has to stand up to that steak), but Argentina has no liquor to call its own, relying on whiskies like Old Smuggler and the low-maintenance Don Juan cognac to carry the flag.

There's a fundamental omission from this list and it's called fernet.

Beer is ubiquitous and comes in a bewildering variety of sizes, although there is a skittishness about the full-on liter. Things level off at 970 mL. In my case, it means I end up drinking 1940 mL of beer as a kind of personal protest, and all is well with the world. To make up for the abundance of sizes, beer comes in only one variety, Quilmes, which inevitably comes served with a tripartite platter of snacks - nuts, salty cylinders, and aged potato chips.

I never had trouble buying beer by the litre, but I confess I never tried to do so in 2006 on account of being under 18 at the time.

Anyway, beer comes in a lot more varieties today, thankfully, because Quilmes sucks. I'll never be a beer person, but at least these days there's options I tolerate.

[original post]

[your-brilliant-lady-m]

Part 1 - Basic Concepts of Miraculous Ladybug: Miraculous Jewels

Alright! I promised you meta and now I deliver!

I feel like people mostly watch Miraculous for the romance these days. Shipping is all everyone cares about. I wonder why? Probably because writers themselves don't take their worldbuilding very seriously and because they don't put much effort into making the audience care about something other than Love Square, like the mythology behind the Miraculous, or motivations of the main villain, or some pretty heavy topics for a kid's show that they bring up and then refuse to touch again. You know, all the good things. And this is coming from someone who is a passionate multishipper. I have lived through several shipping wars in different fandoms and came out victorious after all.

I am probably the only person out there who cares about the big picture, the overall storyline and the worldbuilding of Miraculous in addition to all details and implications that could develop into fascinating plotlines relevant to the main story. It is a rather lonely fandom experience, I must confess. But, hey? Who cares? I am here to have fun and bring to the table discussions no one wants to have.

So, let's talk about the basics.

If you, as the writing team, are capable of keeping only 1 thing consistent, then please, I beg you, let it be the basic concepts of your universe. Because in this case, one has to actively put effort into writing characters and conflict resolutions badly. And also because nothing can save bad worldbuilding.

I don't have high worldbuilding standards for Miraculous. They certainly aren't as high as the ones I had for Legend of Korra (which was a badly written trainwreck, that ATLA doesn't deserve as a sequel) or the ones I currently have for Dragon Prince. Therefore I won't be too harsh in my criticisms. Granted, I think that Miraculous has better worldbuilding and lore consistency than Winx Club for example (I haven't seen the reboot yet, so writers might have fixed their worldbuilding at least a little bit). Even though I enjoyed Winx when I was younger and some elements of this story still attract me.

Both serialised and episodic shows as well as movies to the lesser extent must have some flexibility in worldbuilding and plot because you can never be 100% sure where your story is going. Maybe, you'll get money for more seasons, maybe not. However, you must never lose sight of your basic concepts. They have to stay the same no matter what, because rewriting lore and retconning major developments every new season is not and never will be called good writing.

Forgive me for using architectural metaphors, but you need a solid foundation to build any kind of structure. Otherwise, everything falls apart.

I like to apply this logic to writing as well. When designing a world where your story takes place, you must lay a few ground rules. It's especially important if you have a magic system. What kind of ideas absolutely must exist? What kind of conclusion do you want your story to have? Does your magic system has limitations? Where is the grey area? Could you introduce new elements later on?

And I feel like the writing team of Miraculous Ladybug did not ask these questions. This may feel like I am nit-picking canon material and looking for problems that simply aren't there, but I promise that I am not. You see, things that I am about to point out only seem small at first glance. But these details are actually the source of the largest plotholes in the series. And their presence negatively affects character development, conflicts and resolutions of said conflicts.

That doesn't mean that I have nothing good to say about the magic system of the show and its elements. There are a lot of great ideas and concepts. And some of them have the potential to contribute to the delightful story.

Let's dive right into it, shall we?

Camouflage

I have to give credit where it's due because the idea of camouflage and shapeshifting for Miraculouses is brilliant. It seems like Miraculous can't fundamentally change its type of jewellery or accessory. The ring will always be the ring but with a different ornament, colour or shape. This is true most of the time (Monkey Miraculous is an exception since it transformed into earplugs/headphones/headband/circlet) It makes sense and avoids plotholes. Grimoire doesn't have the pictures of each Miraculous in disguise for identity protection. That was very neat too. I have no comments. This concept was very good.

Also, since Marinette wore a nose ring of the Ox in "Kwamibuster" without any problem and Adrien wore Ladybug's earrings in "Reflekdoll", we can assume that you don't need to have piercings to wear a Miraculous. Miraculous just magically passes through your skin.

I'm interested to know the following. Can Kwamis recognise a camouflaged Miraculous on a person? Can the holder order them to confess the identity of this person? This shouldn't be possible for identity protection just like with Kwamis sensing each other. But more on that in later posts.

Power Levels

For a long time, we assume that there are only 7 Miraculouses. Turtle belongs to Master Fu, Gabriel has Butterfly and Peacock, Marinette and Adrien have Ladybug and Black Cat. Everything is pretty straightforward. Then it's revealed that there are more jewels and more boxes. It makes the worldbuilding interesting, but it also majorly complicates things, making them inconsistent.

Their position in the Miracle Box implies their power levels. Creation and destruction are the most powerful forces in existence, therefore they are at the top. Moreover, it makes this Box the most important, the most powerful out of all others. Su Han in "Furious Fu" calls it "Mother Miracle Box". Fox, Turtle, Bee, Butterfly and Peacock have less power than the main pair, but more than the Miraculous of the lower Zodiac tier (since they correspond with animals of the Chinese Zodiac).

1. Ladybug can create anything out of nothing (Lucky Charm, which gives what you need the most at the moment). This Miraculous can resurrect the dead, reverse the effects of the Cataclysm. The power of Miraculous Cure or Miraculous Ladybug can work in several ways:

it simply repairs the damage (puts stuff back together, heals injuries and so on)

it reverses time for the matter, restoring things back to the state they were before the destruction occurred (however, the Cure doesn't erase people's memories of everything that happened unless they were mind-controlled, frozen in place or transformed by Akuma into something else - this is an important point that I'll discuss some other time)

How does Miraculous Cure work when there are no supervillians? In NY Special Marinette just says this.

Excuse me, what? What was that? You can't do anything when the villain is gone? What the hell?

*insert here every scene where Ladybug fixed Paris after destroying akumatized/amokized object (this action causes the Akuma victim to detransform/sentimonster to disappear - villain is gone) and purifying butterfly and feather*

It was such cheap angst. I couldn't even be upset when Adrien gave up his Miraculous, because that whole situation is just stupid. But, never mind. We aren't talking about that today.

Apparently, Lucky Charm and Miraculous Cure only work when summoned to battle a specific villain. What is the point then? Huh? You can't tell me that Ladybug has the power of unlimited creation and then say that she can't repair the damage without a special Lucky Charm that was magically synchronised with specific big bad of the week.

Ladybug also can purify Akumas. It makes sense for Ladybug to have the ability to reverse the magic of less powerful Miraculous. But this power can't be applied universally. How does this power of reversal apply to different situations where there is no evil Butterfly holder? Can Ladybug reverse the magic of any Miraculous?

The unlimited power of creation introduced in season 4 ("Mr. Pidgeon 72") is another fascinating thing. On one hand, it's logical and proves the status of this Miraculous as the most powerful. On the other hand, by introducing this power, you have created a plothole. Look, Marinette can create the charm which repels Akumas. If Ladybug can create anything then what stops her from creating a tool for finding Hawkmoth (like special glasses for discovering identities or a compass)? I mean, the show says that the power of creation is unlimited, it means that the creation of such tool is possible.

2. Black Cat can destroy anything with Cataclysm, even other Miraculous. He can kill living things and turn them into ash, but not himself. This Miraculous is supposed to have other special abilities that we don't see. And they should be equal to powers of Ladybug, both in number and in potency. Unfortunately, after 3 seasons writers didn't give us anything. It makes laughable the idea of balance between Ladybug and Black Cat.

Now, to the second tier. These Miraculouses have a singular ability, but they need a second one to keep the power balanced between Zodiac and the main pair.

3. Butterfly creates champions with different superpowers. But how does the time limit of children work for Butterfly? In theory, the countdown should start right after the creation of the Akuma since for Ladybug and Chat Noir countdown starts after activation of their powers even if they don't use them. However, if the countdown of the Butterfly begins after Akuma creation then there's no point because the holder has to stay transformed to guide their champion. The charged butterfly won't have time to even grant powers before the transformation of the child-holder drops. This issue is never explored because Gabriel doesn't have a time limit. However, I feel like it should be addressed in flashbacks of past Butterfly holders for example.

This Miraculous should be less powerful than Ladybug and Black Cat. It's often not. Some Akumas are too overpowered. Stormy Weather can move the Earth away from the Sun, Timetagger can send people through time and jump through time as well, Chat Blanc destroyed the world with a single energy blast, Miraculer could steal powers of those more powerful than her by default. These are the most notable examples. One could argue that Chat Blanc was a different case. Hawkmoth simply gave the most powerful Miraculous a boost. However, we know that even without a holder (the wildest and the most powerful form of uncontrolled Miraculous magic) Plagg's Cataclysm can't destroy the universe just like that (he presumably wiped out dinosaurs and sunk Atlantis on his own without a holder). I think that the less powerful Miraculous (Butterfly) shouldn't be able to increase the power of destruction to such a degree and give Black Cat the power to destroy celestial bodies and galaxies.

Writers want us to see Hawkmoth as the formidable villain. But it's not easy because he is less powerful than your main heroes by default of your worldbuilding. Sometimes writers make the Butterfly more powerful than creation and destruction to raise the stakes, breaking the laws of their magic system. So, how do you solve this? Let Ladybug and Black Cat keep their status as the most powerful and instead of giving Hawkmoth more magical power, make him smarter, more cunning, inventive. Gabriel is a fashion designer, whose creativity makes him a very good Butterfly holder. He has a life full of experience, he knows much more about things than the main teenage characters. Catalyst was very interesting for this very reason. Gabriel sort of discovered a cheat code to boost his powers. Show us how he experiments with his powers, how he analyses his past Akumas and tries to find the most effective ones. Maybe Gabriel tries to design Akumas that can specifically neutralise Ladybug and Chat Noir. This exploration could also give writers an opportunity to explain how the powers of Butterfly work. Can he control the type of powers he grants? Can he control the appearance of Akumas? There are many things to be explored.

4. Peacock creates sentimonsters. I remember that fans were very disappointed when the power of the Peacock was revealed at the end of season 2. I was one of them. The concept of Amoks is far too similar to akumatized butterflies. Other Miraculouses have unique abilities and keywords for their powers, while Peacock just looks like Butterfly 2.0. That glowing mask effect just adds insult to injury.

You have to start by figuring out the powers of the Peacock in a normal situation. If a holder is a good person, then how does their power work? For example, make them related to sight (because of the "eye" pattern on feathers). Maybe, Peacock grants the ability to see the several possibilities of the future, but only a few minutes ahead. Maybe, this Miraculous gives you the ability to see through someone's eyes for a few minutes (and the victim is completely unaware of the intrusion). Perhaps, Peacock allows the holder to use feathers (or tiny peacocks) as cameras one at a time and be all-seeing. These feather-spies can be destroyed by the holder or disappear on their own after some time. Such power could be devastating when used against heroes in canon.

5. Bee can paralyze. This power is pretty straightforward. Once I read a fanfiction focused on very vell done Chloe Redemption, where she fights alongside Ladybug and Chat Noir. Eventually, she grows and becomes a better person. This fic ends with an Akuma battle, where LB and CN are trapped and Akuma is ready to kill them. But Chloe uses a second power of the Bee on the villain - Miraculous Stinger. It's deadly both for the holder and for the victim (because bees die when they sting someone). Chloe kills the Akuma with a Stinger before it can get LB and CN, but she too dies making the ultimate irreversible sacrifice. I will add a link if I find it again.

6. Turtle can create a shield. I don't have much to say on this either. It feels underpowered compared to others in the second tier. Maybe Turtle can also slow down opponents (because turtles aren't the fasters animals out there).

7. Fox creates illusions and acts as their puppeteer. In order to create a balance between other powers, these illusions must hold for as long as the holder needs them to. I propose this mostly because we see that Venom of the Bee lasts very long, the shield of the Turtle lasts either until it's destroyed or the holder wants to remove it, same goes for Akumas and sentimonsters who disappear only when the holder wants them to or their affected object is destroyed.

Let's talk about Zodiac tier. Miraculous of the third tier shouldn't have the second ability like more powerful ones. These powers are the most inconsistent. Even if we haven't seen all of them yet.

8. Mouse can create many small clones of the holder. It is unclear how these clones communicate with each other and how many of them this Miraculous can create. The holder can control the number of clones. This power was very convenient in "Kwamibuster" and it makes sense symbolically for the mouse. What activates the time-limit for children? Marinette didn't have any problems with it when she became Multimouse.

9. Snake can create a 5-minute time loop and has the ability to come back in time. This Miraculous feels a bit overpowered for the Miraculous of the Zodiac Tier. The holder can reset the time as many times as he/she needs to. It's was a good source of drama and trauma in "Desperada". I was honestly surprised that Adrien was capable of fighting after spending months in a loop. But this doesn't change the fact that Snake is overpowered. You can give this Miraculous the power to hypnotise or keep the time ability but place a limit on the number of resets. How does the lyre work as a weapon? Who knows? No one!

10. Dragon can shapeshift into elements: water, wind and lightning. It has the coolest transformation words hands down (Bring the Storm and Open Sky). Apparently this Miraculous doesn't have the time limit.

11. Rabbit can time travel or jump through alternative realities, even writers aren't sure. Time-travel in this show is so badly written it gives me a headache. This Miraculous shouldn't exist just like its powers. Snake belongs to the same tier, but 5 minutes and whole centuries of time jumps aren't comparable in power levels. They are not and this is the hill I will die on. Give the Rabbit powers related to its symbolism in China like an ability to de-age people, heal them or give them a speed boost in contrast with Turtle who might have the ability to slow down.

This Miraculous is so special that its Kwami - Fluff can live separately from his Miraculous in a Miracle Box for millennia (Fluff lives in the Box in "Sandboy", but his Miraculous, pocket watch, was passed down for generations in Alix's family). This is a discussion for a separate post, however. There's a lot to unpack. We'll do that some other time. You will suffer with me but at a later date.

12. Horse can create portals. They could lead anywhere, which is pretty cool. On the other hand, this power is not very useful in direct combat, especially when it's used by a child since we can have only one portal per transformation.

13. Monkey can cause a malfunction in powers of other people. What is the point of this? This power was specifically created by writers to defeat Akuma in "Party Crasher". That's it. What if your target is not magical? How does this Miraculous work in different circumstances?

14. Pig shows people their greatest desire. Both the holder and the recipient of this power can see this desire. Chat Noir wasn't impressed in "Guiltrip" and neither was I. It's underpowered compared to other Miraculous in this tier. Also, why does the tambourine can shoot energy beams? Why?

That's all I have to say on the matter. I'll update the power analysis as needed.

[heroes-writing]

Hello! It’s great to see you back again, you’re one of my favourite OPM writers! And greetings to Stella, it’s good to have you aboard •v• Is my Zombieman with a former experiment s/o still on the books? If not, I’d like to request it again if that’s alright. Good luck with the quarantine, and stay safe! •v•

Greetings Anon!

Okay well shit, maybe it’s impossible for me to do headcanons for prompts like these without turning it into a story-length outline, goddamnit. I always feel the need to put more and more detail to make it feel real. Hi, my middle name is ‘Extra’.

This also turned out to be a wild animal - morphed into a double whammy of HC-scenarios. I hope it’s close enough to hit what your prompt asks.

Enjoy under the cut,

Stella

Word count: 1202

Okay, so I get the feeling that successful mad scientists like Dr. Genus are not, in fact, running rampant, even in a universe like OPM’s. This shit takes a lot of hard work and knowledge and you gotta know what you’re doing. Most rogue scientists either quit because of the low success rate or get killed by their creations.

Zombieman’s SO would, in fact, be a scientist that volunteered to experiment on themselves, backed by a team in the Hero Association’s Research & Development biology division. (Side note, obviously no one in the OPM world ever has taken a course on scientific ethics or human subject research.) They’re trying to get powerful enough to become an A-class or even an S-class hero. They have a strong drive to make the world a better place, along with scientific curiosity (to see what they can do with their knowledge), and this is the result of their extreme devotion and obsession taken to its conclusion.

They know what they’re doing, but guys, shit happens. The experiment is only moderately successful due to some unforeseen hiccups. SO joins the Hero Association as a high B-rank hero. This obviously isn’t good enough to investigate further in, so that little research foray is scrapped by R&D and kept on the down-low. 

SO is neither particularly well-known nor obscure and they periodically suffer from side effects of surgical augmentations; their hero name is “Human Experiment” (lol). Zombieman hears about their vague origin story (at least part of it, anyway) and seeks them out to find out if they were also a victim of the House of Evolution, in hopes of tracking down Genus.

He’s disappointed to find that they are not part of the House of Evolution. Despite that, he still feels a weird kinship of sorts with them, and they end up talking a little longer. Zombieman ends up enjoying their company, and they start hanging out whenever they’re both at HQ. Because it’s classified information, SO doesn’t reveal at this point that they experimented on themselves with the help of the HA.

After a few weeks, Zombieman finally asks SO out on a proper date, and it’s during this first date that SO reveals their true origins as an experiment, because they don’t feel like they should let Z get into a relationship with them under this huge lie of omission. Z is surprised and a little disappointed since he’d been under the impression that they’d had an extremely similar experience to him. But, they didn’t actively deceive him about it, so he puts it behind him and accepts it for what it is. 

Despite this, after a while of being in a relationship with SO, he feels able to talk about his experiences with them and is interested in hearing about how theirs was similar or different. He’s a little bitter, but too rational and calm to truly be upset about how his experimentation was forced, and how theirs was consensual and self-inflicted. It’s their past, they accept each other, it is what it is. 

Although they’ve both come to terms with their life before meeting each other, they still talk about their experiences together. It provides him with a source of relief to be able to share with someone the worst parts of his life that he can remember and not have to censor the most graphic parts. He shares his fears and anger, and they their hopes and doubts, about what they both went through during their experimentation. 

He shares his hatred of being drugged to the gills, the mindless terror of a prey animal he’d felt as he fought for his life and then died during the first few dozen times his regeneration was tested, desperately wanting to actually die to end it, the rush of adrenaline that still floods his body after he wakes before he realizes he’s no longer a captive in the basement. His sensitivity towards being called a monster as he is definitely still a human.

SO has the utmost empathy hearing about Z’s experience -- they were willing, but he wasn’t; they imagine their own experimentation if it were non-consensual and how awful it would have been. SO is extremely indignant on his behalf and can’t help but rant about how disrespectful it was to Z, how improper those procedures were, and how Genus is a disgrace to all scientists and shouldn’t be considered a proper one. They soothe Z with kisses and reassure that he is in no way a monster.

His SO shares their naive idealism that had spurred them to volunteer their body for the cause, their wavering conviction as it became clear that the overwhelming success they had planned for was no longer guaranteed, their uncertainty that it was worth it at all. Their struggles as they doubt if they’re human anymore: they look like one, but they feel like they’ve been changed on such a fundamental level, they’re not sure if they can even share the full human experience anymore.

Z is not unsympathetic towards SO and knows better than to blame them for their self-inflicted situation they’d created. He tells them that they shouldn’t worry if they’re human or not: their heart is in the right place and their actions are pure and good.

SO then confesses that they actually hate killing monsters because they feel that they’re too much like humans -- monsters have feelings, ambitions, thoughts, and dreams of their own. Zombieman reveals that his enjoyment of killing monsters (often brutally so) is only because he feels the desperate need to prove he’s not one.

Shit gets philosophical between them. They become engrossed in their conversation as the sun sets and the street lights flicker on. What is the line between human and monster? The difference between extreme experimentation and monsterization? There are humans that harm other humans in egregious ways, but they don’t get hunted down like monsters. There are monsters that don’t harm humans, but they are exterminated anyway. What makes a monster a monster? Intent, actions, self-perception, or how others see you? And in the end, does it even matter at all? 

-----

Finally, I have an unhealthy love of angst, so I have a little separate headcanon-plot about Zombieman and his little science-experiment-SO being in a steady relationship, but with the twist that they have to deal with the fallout of his SO’s experimentation, which is starkly different from his own outcome. 

His SO doesn’t have a “positive” result like Zombieman and their experimentation was botched and unsuccessful. Instead of regenerative abilities and basically not being able to die, she has the thematic opposite, i.e. slow-acting but terminal cancer from her exposure to the carcinogenic substances that were used during her time in captivity. 

She can buy a little time with amputations of body parts (contrast with Z being able to GROW BACK parts), but it will kill her eventually. She opts to do this to be able to spend more time with Zombieman, but they both have to deal with the consequences of her declining ability to be independent and care for herself with the loss of each limb. 

Oh lort I just made myself supremely sad.

[monkey-network]

An Unfortunate Critique of Spiderverse - Part 1 (of 3)

Spider-Man: Into the Spiderverse was a fun award-winning 2018 animated film with a basically unanimously positive fandom, regarded generally as both a masterpiece Spider-Man film and a remarkable animated film overall. And while I do not disagree with that, it definitely earned its spoils, it pains me a bit to bring up the reason(s) why I can’t call it the masterpiece that many claim. I like this film, but I don’t love it as much as others and I wanted to express why. And I will see to be critical, not cynical. Fair enough? Spoilers ahead for this... 2018 film that you should’ve seen already.

Part 1 ~ The Spiderverse Squad

Now believe me when I say that I enjoyed this trio. Spider-Ham wasn’t as funny as I figured, but he still stood out like Peni and Spider-Noir in a respectable way. I especially loved the fandom’s reaction to them with fanart and jokes galore. But on a look back, it dawned on me that while their presence was welcome, our writers blew the load too soon and wasted these characters. Roll with me, will ya?

If you come to know me, you’ll figure that characters are the element I find the most crucial of your story; you mentally can’t just throw in random heroes into the story unless they’re significant to the protag, story, or world as a whole. It’ll feel weird, like you have no coordination. And yeah, the B team adds to Spider-verse’s worldbuilding mechanic that is the multiple universes; it thematically makes sense that more than one Spidermun can exist. And additionally kicks ass, no objections here. The problem I argue comes when while they add to the world building, it honestly added little to our boy Miles’ story, and it’s that disconnect that makes the characters feel more unnecessary than before. This doesn’t help when things could’ve worked far better if it only involved Gwen and Beter. To explain this better, I wanna bring up a couple films that are similar to Spider-verse yet knew how to use their secondary characters, the first one being...

Kung Fu Panda, baby!

The furious five sans Tigress is about the same as Spider-verse’s B-Team where Po really doesn’t rely on them to both unleash his inner strength and face the final boss in the end. They’re his muse for enjoying martial arts. Po interacts with them a little more than Miles does with the others, but we still have that disconnect between the upcoming novice and the experienced. That disconnect however is counter-balanced by their significance in the story, not only in certifying the stakes that come with Tai Lung, but being the necessary crew to another important character: Tigress.

Tigress is not only a character that Po looks up to, she’s a character with something to prove herself. She puts down Po because she’s envious of the special treatment he’s involuntarily receiving and mirrors the villain Tai Lung before his descent to villainy. The movie would’ve probably been fine if the Furious Five didn’t exist and it was just Shifu and Po training together, but having the five, and Tigress especially, in the story adds a great triangle of interaction between Po and Shifu, Shifu and Tigress, and Tigress and Po. Which makes it all the more poignant when she runs away to face Tai Lung herself, stern in proving herself to both Shifu and Po. We know that she wouldn’t win against him, but that loss is added two-fold when the other four were there to support her. The others aren’t as cynical towards Po, but it’s understandable that they sided with Tigress, thinking their experience together will help them succeed. It makes sense that the four willingly fight with Tigress, and it’s reasonably daunting when Tai Lung is able to tower all of them by himself. Compare this to Spiderverse where we kinda don’t get see our heroes and villains, excluding Miles, stack up that well until the 3rd act; it’s hard to wonder if who’s evenly matched and who can overpower whom. It doesn’t help that Peter, Gwen, and Miles are all isolated from the other three during the final fight in the warp terminal. 

It’s in the end where Po proves himself the Dragon Warrior, he not only earned that respect from the five but feels more complete knowing he and his idols look up to each other in a way. We really don’t get that interpersonal synergy with Miles and the B team beyond the moment of them together post Aaron’s death and their initial meeting, the best we get is that Miles knows he isn’t the only Spider-man but even that doesn’t feel as personal as his relationships with Gwen and Peter. Plus while Gwen and Peter are important characters, we don’t see much of a personal connection between the five Spidermun, it mostly comes off as an obligation that they’re together. Now I won’t lie, this is a pretty unfair comparison. The B-team came together on the fly, and it’s not like Miles, Gwen, and Peter knew who they were in the first place. But remember when I said a couple of films in the beginning? This leads to an ironic situation, coming from one of my other favorite movies about being special...

Been a while since I talked ‘bout this beauty

I think it’s safe to say Spiderverse and The Lego Movie have a kindred story beat where our hero meet some tagalongs that have their own thing but nonetheless contribute as supporting characters. But unlike Spiderverse, the Lego Movie showed something I never figured about characters until I saw it once again last year. The other characters have their stake in the plot, but they are also relative features of our main character Emmett. Unikitty resembles his boundless optimism, Benny his excitability, Batman his emotional conviction, and so on. It’s a stretch, but it is possible to note supporting/secondary characters as facets of who our main character is, what they lack or what’s the most prominent idea of them. In Steven Universe, the crystal gems are separate elements of who Steven is at his best or wants to be. Beastars has Legosi, Louis, and Haru have differing aspects of growing up that blend well when united. It’s essentially the braincells meme, the parts make up the whole. Gwen and Peter fill those parts exponentially for Miles, with Peter’s experience and Gwen’s finesse in her skill, to show him the work that goes in being a hero. Same goes for Aaron and Jefferson on a more personal level, being the ones to give Miles the necessary conviction to become the hero. All I gotta ask is: Can ya say the same for Peni, Noir, or Porker?

Again, not that they’re bad characters, but they mostly felt detached from the story in multiple angles

Now at this point you’ll probably say, “Monkey, we get it, where are you going with this?” Well, I can’t help but feel the B-team, while alright on their own, unfortunately feel like cameos that overstayed their welcome. Beyond the initial meetup, the interactions we get with them are second to none, there is no significant dynamic between the B-team and the two spidermun that are more significant to the story. I feel a little less charitable for media wasting potential and it doesn’t help that writing them out until the final fight is very easy. “Peni and Sp//dr were responsible for repairing the flash drive?” Well, I can say a few hints in the movie can point to Aunt May, Peter, and/or Gwen doing it instead. It’s hard to come back to this film compared to the others I’ve exampled when the back of my mind is going “Why are ya’ll here?” I say it would’ve been surprisingly cathartic if the B-team came near the end where they helped out and met up with the trio before bouncing back to their dimensions. As such, we could put more time in for Miles and Gwen together at Aunt May’s house the same way Peter and Miles got earlier before the plot generally runs the same, we have less voices but we build on those character dynamics for more than that bus ride they share. Add to that character theme of Miles, Gwen, and Peter B. being the different generations of Spider-man or something. Overall, I love them, and they feel wasted in this film.

I just can’t see Spiderverse where the focus of these three subsides the interest for the other three

I wanted to discuss this particularly because as much I can say that much detail in the film fundamentally works, which I will discuss later in this analysis, it stands to say that not every ambition in this undoubtedly ambitious movie was added well. It’s honestly how i feel with randomness humor, it’s fun at first but you gotta do more than enough to make it timeless while keeping the surprise of it intact. Or else you just wish they just replaced that joke with something more constructed. Said before, they don’t or weren’t able to utilize these characters beyond their cameo level moments, and it is not a good thing that they’re potentially saved for the sequel because I hate the idea of depending on a sequel to fix the 1st movie’s issues. I gotta wait to 2022 for a potentially better management of characters and that bothers me. I appreciate what I got, but I unfortunately can’t say that appreciation equates to a free pass of what’s detrimental to my love for this film. Now, I tagged this as part one for a reason, because this is only a symptom, a fun size piece to a bigger story problem I have.

Next time. Otherwise, thanks for reading and I hope you enjoy your day.

[kkintle]

Into the Woods: A Five Act Journey Into Story by John Yorke; Quotes

There’s no doubt that for many those rules help. Friedrich Engels put it pithily: ‘Freedom is the recognition of necessity.’

‘You need the eye, the hand and the heart,’ proclaims the ancient Chinese proverb. ‘Two won’t do.’

Delacroix countered the fear of knowledge succinctly: ‘First learn to be a craftsman; it won’t keep you from being a genius.’

We are capable of entering any kind of head. David Edgar justified his play about the Nazi architect Albert Speer by saying: ‘The awful truth – and it is awful, in both senses of the word – is that the response most great drama asks of us is neither “yes please” nor “no thanks” but “you too?”. Or, in the cold light of dawn, “there but for the grace of God go I”.’

As Peter Brook writes in The Empty Space, ‘In the theatre the slate is wiped clean all the time.’ Drama is a test-bed on which we can test and confront our darkest impulses under laboratory conditions; where we can experience the desires without having to confront the consequences. Drama enables us to peer into the soul, not of the person who has driven his father out onto the heath, but the person who has wanted to.

Our favourite characters are the ones who, at some silent level, embody what we all want for ourselves: the good, the bad and ugly too.

‘The more successful the villain, the more successful the picture.’

‘Somebody’s got to want something, something’s got to be standing in their way of getting it. You do that and you’ll have a scene.’

‘Tell me what you want,’ said Anton Chekhov, ‘and I will tell you what manner of man you are.’

Cops want to catch the killer, doctors want to heal their patient; in truth it doesn’t actually matter what the object is, its importance is bestowed by those in pursuit.

What a character thinks is good for them is often at odds with what actually is. This conflict, as we shall see, appears to be one of the fundamental tenets of structure, because it embodies the battle between external and internal desire.

Characters then should not always get what they want, but should – if they deserve it – get what they need. That need, or flaw, is almost always present at the beginning of the film. The want, however, cannot become clear until after the inciting incident.

The crisis occurs when the hero’s final dilemma is crystallized, the moment they are faced with the most important question of the story – just what kind of person are they? Finding themselves in a seemingly inescapable hole, the protagonist is presented with a choice.

So the inciting incident provokes the question ‘What will happen’ and the climax (or obligatory act) declares – ‘this’.

As Shakespearean scholar Jan Kott noted before him, ‘Ancient Tragedy is loss of life, modern Tragedy is loss of purpose’.

‘good’ is a relative concept

Change is the bedrock of life and consequently the bedrock of narrative.

THE ROADMAP OF CHANGE ACT 1 No knowledge Growing knowledge Awakening ACT 2 Doubt Overcoming reluctance Acceptance ACT 3 Experimenting with knowledge MIDPOINT – KEY KNOWLEDGE Experimenting post-knowledge ACT 4 Doubt Growing reluctance Regression ACT 5 Reawakening Re-acceptance Total mastery

A well-designed midpoint has a risk/reward ratio: a character gains something vital, but in doing so ramps up the jeopardy around them.

JOURNEY THERE; JOURNEY BACK

All stories at some level are about a search for the truth of the subject they are exploring. Just as the act of perception involves seeking out the ‘truth’ of the thing perceived, so storytelling mimics that process. The ‘truth’ of the story, then, lies at the midpoint. The protagonist’s action at this point will be to overcome that obstacle, assimilate that truth and begin the journey back – the journey to understand the implications of what that ‘truth’ really means.

Stories are built from acts, acts are built from scenes and scenes are built from even smaller units called beats. All these units are constructed in three parts: fractal versions of the three-act whole. Just as a story will contain a set-up, an inciting incident, a crisis, a climax and a resolution, so will acts and so will scenes.

‘Drama is life with the dull bits cut out.’ Alfred Hitchcock  

Screenwriting is showing not telling; structure is the presentation of images in such a way an audience are forced to work out the relationship between them. Stanton had stumbled upon what is known amongst film theoreticians as the ‘Kuleshov Effect’.

I want to get an abortion, but my boyfriend and I are having trouble conceiving. American comedian Sarah Silverman’s joke is built on a classic subversion of expectation. But take a look at any joke, or any scene in any drama: the juxtaposition of opposites, verbal or visual or both, is the central plank not just of showing rather than telling, but of all humour, all narrative. Something, confronted with its opposite, makes us recast our notion of that ‘something’ again.

Everyone customizes, consciously or not, everything they do.

Every decision we make or action we perform when confronted with an obstacle is a choice that reveals – through action – our personality. In every scene, remember, a protagonist is presented with a mini crisis, and must make a choice as to how to surmount it. Meeting with a subversion of expectation – a blow to their established plans – a character must choose a new course of action. In doing so they reveal a little bit more of who they are.

as F. Scott Fitzgerald put it, ‘The test of a first-rate intelligence is the ability to hold two opposed ideas in mind at the same time and still retain the ability to function.’

It was Kenneth Tynan who said ‘a neurosis is a secret you don’t know you’re keeping’.

The less back-story a character has, the more readily an audience is able to identify with them – the more we can see they’re like us and not like someone else. We may want to know more, but it’s the not knowing that keeps us watching. It allows us to fully experience the journey ourselves and actively join in the process in which a character pursues their goal, their flaw is subsumed into their façade, their need into their want, and the goal of all drama is achieved – a rich, complex, three-dimensional character appears in front of our eyes.

The three most important functions of dialogue – characterization, exposition and subtext – are all, as we shall see, products of character desire.

Good dialogue conveys how a character wants to be seen while betraying the flaws they want to hide.

Grammar, vocabulary, syntax, rhythm, sentence length, jargon or slang – when combined in a particular way, they all allow us to understand who a person is. Change one and the character changes. Dialogue isn’t just about what someone says; how they choose to say it is important too.

Exposition works when it’s a tool a character uses to achieve their desire. If this desire is confronted with opposition, conflict is generated and exposition becomes invisible. The greater the conflict, the less visible the exposition.

Silence of the Lambs screenwriter Ted Tally put the art of writing dialogue succinctly: ‘What’s important is not the emotion they’re playing but the emotion they’re trying to conceal.’

So masked desire is the main source of subtext.

Georg Simmel, the nineteenth-century sociologist, put it rather eloquently: ‘All we communicate to another individual by means of words or perhaps in another fashion – even the most subjective, impulsive, intimate matters – is a selection from that psychological-real whole whose absolutely exact report … would drive everybody into the insane asylum.’

‘No description is as difficult as the description of self.’

We watch stories not just to awaken our eyes to reality but to make reality bearable as well. Truth without hope is as unbearable as hope without truth.

Out of our quarrel with others we make rhetoric; out of the quarrel with ourselves we make poetry. - W. B. Yeats

the idea that ‘we crash into each other just to feel something’.

McGovern believed neither of the two arguments, but he’d mastered a very important principle: that whatever you believe should be tested to destruction.

As Andrew Stanton says, ‘You often hear the term “You should have something to say in a story” but that doesn’t always mean a message. It means truth, some value that you yourself as a storyteller believe in, and then through the course of the story are able to debate that truth. Try to prove it wrong. Test it to its limits.’

There is much to learn from the game of chess, whose individual engagements are all part of one long engagement seeking a condition not of adversity or conflict or defeat or even victory, but of the harmony underlying all.

Javed Akhtar, the co-writer of Sholay, the most successful Indian movie of all time, made a shrewd observation: You must have seen children playing with a string and a pebble. They tie a string and the pebble and they start swinging it over their head. And slowly they keep loosening the string, and it makes bigger and bigger circles. Now this pebble is the revolt from the tradition, it wants to move away … The string is the tradition, the continuity. It’s holding it. But if you break the string the pebble will fall. If you remove the pebble the string cannot go that far. This tension of tradition and revolt against the tradition … are in a way contradictory, but as a matter of fact [are] a synthesis. You will always find a synthesis of tradition and revolt from tradition together in any good art.

just why fairy tales hover on the edges of cruelty; it’s about how ‘baddies’ are the products of inner conflict 

‘All of us are potential villains,’ the legendary Disney animators Frank Thomas and Ollie Johnston once remarked. ‘If we are pushed far enough, pressured beyond our breaking point, our self-preservation system takes over and we are capable of terrible villainy.’

Storytelling, then, is the dramatization of the process of knowledge assimilation.

Like much that is briefly fashionable, it didn’t survive because it had nothing meaningful to say. A greater test of worth must be whether a work lasts for more than a generation.

an observation from Robert Hughes: ‘The basic project of art is always to make the world whole and comprehensible, to restore it to us in all its glory and its occasional nastiness, not through argument but through feeling, and then to close the gap between you and everything that is not you, and in this way pass from feeling to meaning.’

‘Art consists of limitation. The most beautiful part of every picture is the frame.’ G. K. Chesterton   

[gal-liveblogs]

So we start off Homestuck 2 with a picture of space. Got some green space clouds. So far nothing I would not expect. Though I see there also appears to be a spaceship of some kind, zooming through all this space. Would this be Dirk’s ship?

. . . Yep. That’s defiantly Dirk’s ship. I’m sure Theseus has some really deep, literary meaning, but the reference flies right over my head. As does most of Dirk’s references. He’s too smart for me.

I find it funny that Jake continues the tradition of emblazoning his face on his things. We saw his alt-self of Grandpa Harley doing at all the time. Dirk, of course, has to scribble out the face of his ex.

Dirk. Dirk, are you wearing a villain cape right now? Is that what you’re doing in this moment? Dirk, please.

He is totally wearing a villain cape, complete with tattered edges. He is also wearing a Heart gi, because Dirk is nothing if not anime.

Jesus Christ, I already see the paragraphs of orange under this. You’re gonna make me read all this, aren’t you. Dirk?

Dirk proves to be as verbose as ever.

So did Dirk really write out all his narration on physical pieces of paper and scatter them over his desk? Did he do that just to be Extra, or is that something he has to do as an Author now? Do they only count in the narrative text if they are actual text and not just his own thoughts?

Whatever the case may be, Rose interrupts his soliloquy.

I have it on authority that decanting is sometimes necessary to ensure a wine is at its best. I like to think that the same was ultimately true of her.

Decanting of a person’s soul sounds particularly ominous, thought I can’t express the exact reason why.

ROSEBOT: I just imagined you wearing an apron over your god tier outfit and almost felt my facial fuselage buckle in such a way as to approximate a fleeting smile.

Glad to see being a robot and also assimilating all her possible selves Rose remains a sass queen.

DIRK: Alright we get it you are literally a robot.

DIRK: No need to keep pointing it out every chance you can get. I got enough of this with the Auto Responder.

ROSEBOT: I'm just playing along.

ROSEBOT: One of the fundamentals of bad science fiction is that any artificial beings must make their inorganic nature known at every juncture they can.

DIRK: Do overly precise and completely meaningless statistics that you pull out of your ass on the fly also count?

ROSEBOT: Oh absolutely.

ROSEBOT: That's one of the first things you just sort of spontaneously learn when being booted up.

ROSEBOT: For example, I've calculated that by making these remarks I have raised the base level of amusement in all my conversations by 36%.

DIRK: Well I don't personally find them very funny.

Dirk has some trauma with robots pulling out bullshit statics. Which makes it all the more fascinating he continues to build robots that can have free thought.

Jesus Christ, it wasn’t just the lighting, Dirk’s shades really are orange now. Hussie may not have known about Kamina when he designed Bro, but Dirk always wearing Kamina glasses has just become a part of his character. So much so that they are even colored like Kamina’s instead of black now. I have to wonder, had Kamina not been a character that already existed or if people hadn’t kept pointing out that Dirk/Bro wore shades similar to an anime character, would Dirk be so anime? Is being anime just a character trait that Hussie gave him because of a funny coincidence and he wanted to play up the joke, or was he always intended to be so anime?

Also is that trashcan literally an inferno?

ROSEBOT: I just thought you might like to know that we're getting pretty close to your chosen crash site.

Do they not know how to land the ship? Does the ship not have landing gear? Do they need to crash for narrative reasons and otherwise would be perfectly capable of landing normally? Is Rose just making a joke?

DIRK: Wait, crash site??

Oh, good, Dirk is as confused as I am. So that rules out narrative reasons.

ROSEBOT: A landing gear appears to have fallen just a little outside the realm of vital.

So lacking landing gear it is! God damn it, Jake.

DIRK: (God DAMN it English.)

Ha!

ROSEBOT: Don't be such a chud, Dirk.

I am afraid to ask what a chud is. Is that like a cuck? I don’t know what a cuck is either. I am also afraid to ask what a cuck is.

ROSEBOT: She's functionally mortal, remember?

Yeah, that really sucks that Karkat, Terezi, and Kanaya all lack godtier. Karkat would complain about his lack of flight abilities, but I’m surprised Terezi or Kanaya never brought up this fact. Especially Kanaya, what with her marriage to Rose. Kanaya would eventually grow old and die, leaving Rose to keep on living. Of course, Rosebot has decided to leave her loving wife behind so in this particular case that point doesn’t matter.

DIRK: You mean to say that you don't think we'd be in peril if it came to it?

DIRK: There's nothing about our situation that strikes you as falling within the bounds of precarity, as far as the rules are concerned?

ROSEBOT: Oh. You're right. I suppose I hadn't thought of that.

ROSEBOT: But I think we can remain calm in the knowledge that nothing particularly heroic is going on right now. At least, not that I'm aware of.

DIRK: ... Right.

Not sure if Dirk’s meaning flew over Rose’s head, or if she’s just choosing to ignore the possibility of Just deaths as a joke.

That doesn't mean this (*gestures to the narrative*) isn't still going to be a thing, though.

I don’t know why, but this tickles my funny bone.

All in all I think you'll find, as far as narrators go, I'm an excellent... hm. On second thought, maybe that's a bit of a problematic phrase. Yeah, yikes, that one's got a sordid history. Best we steer clear of it. We're all lucky I'm around to make those kinds of sensitivity judgements on everyone's behalf.

I’m glad you can recognize that Homestuck fans all have a fight or flight response that that memetic phrase, but I don’t appreciate you patting yourself on the back for being sensitive when you, as a narrator, could not use Roxy’s correct pronouns once they came to light.

It's time to get this story back on the rails, back to what it was always supposed to be. I know it, and you've somehow always known it too. There was something else, some other route that Homestuck was meant to take but then didn't, a way that wouldn't've spent so much time dicking around with stuff nobody cares about. Like seriously, why did we all have to sit through talking about everyone's most intimate and private feelings for two hundred thousand fucking words. That would never have happened in Act 1. Where did it all go wrong?

So Dirk’s grand plan is to go back to the asinine tomfoolery of Act 1? To do away with character relations and feelings and have people messing around with their sylladexes? I must say, I never would have expected this from the likes of Dirk. I thought he was all about the complex thought processes and inner turmoil.

Thank you for returning the narration to classic black, Dirk. It’s so much easier on the eyes.

Channelling my full potential as an ascended player of Heart, I expand my consciousness to commune with the boundless force of collective willpower that is the internet.

Wow, who knew Heart players could become the internet. I mean, I guess it makes sense. The internet is just a collection of people, and Heart is all about the soul. 

I was really hoping the command box he made would be an actual command box. I missed out on the Homestuck days of old where the command box was a real thing. It would have been fun to be a part of that myself, but I understand the fandom is just too big for that ever to be feasible again. That’s why it was done away with in the first place, and that was when the fandom was smaller.

The writers came up with e good command, though.

Yeah, I have a feeling Dirk is going to decide to ignore this command and stop taking suggestions. Either that, or he’s going to inform us that he is not making Homestuck, he’s making Homestuck 2.

But I should have known better. People think you can run a story like this? This must be just about the stupidest idea anyone has ever come up with. I'll just have to make up the commands myself from here on out. Seemed to work ok for the other guy.

Yep, pretty much what I expected.

Oh Jesus Christ, what even is this room?

O.K., let’s take things from the top. Looks like we got the beta kids’ entry items, as well as their Aspect flags from Prospit and Derse. Why does Dirk have these things? There also appear to be some cruxite dowels next to them, but they are any of the colors we’ve seen before.

WOAH, HOLD UP, Are those Dave’s copies of SBURB? Or are they Bro’s? Clearly Dirk has just collected a bunch of items from various points in Homestuck’s timeline like some sort of museum. For what purpose, though?

Oh my god, there’s a Tab watering can. I assume it was alchemized, since Dirk mentioned earlier using alchemy to make his rad new shades. I wonder why Dirk has that Skaianet poster on his wall. I would have thought he’d want nothing to do with anything Jake had his fingers in. Then again, there also appears to be a kotatsu with Jake’s bedspread in the middle of the room.

I can’t tell what the green thing is next to the mutated kitten. Or what that other green thing next to the robot horse is either.

OH FUCK ME THERE’S A ROBOT CAL IN THE PROCESS OF BEING MADE. DIRK, NO. WHY. YOU HAVE THE NARRATIVE CONTROL NOW, YOU SHOULD KNOW CAL IN ANY FORM IS BAD NEWS.

Is that... Is that an anime body pillow there at the bottom?

I also keep my FLORA OF THE SUCCULENT PERSUASION in here, so's I can keep an eye on them.

Dirk grows succulents... That is not a character trait I expected of him.

> Continue

[writingonesdreams]

Novel Prep Tag Game 2

So I did this one before, but the questions are so great I'm probably going to do this for every important story idea. So here goes the newest one!

Rules: Answer the questions and then tag as many writers as there are questions answered (or as many as you can) to spread the positivity! Even if these questions are not explicitly brought up in the novel, they are still good to keep in mind when writing.

1. Describe your novel in 1-2 sentences (elevator pitch)

A young ambassador tries to keep peace during the tournament where mages from different dimensions use their abilities for sport instead of combat for the first time after the Era of Wars.

2. How long do you plan for your novel to be? (Is it a novella, single book, book series, etc.)

A novel for now.

3. What is your novel’s aesthetic?

Changing dimensions. Big cities. Empty desolated desert. Seascape with scattered rocks. 

4. What other stories inspire your novel?  

Darker Shade of Magic series from V.A. Schwab, Masaryk movie, Megalo Box anime 

5. Share 3+ images that give a feel for your novel

6. Who is your protagonist?  

Anise the dimension ambassador. She is one of the strongest mages of her age, mastering the highest level of magic and has been selected by the current ruling mage family to keep peace and contact between her assigned dimensions.

7. Who is their closest ally?

The second prince Cole, who is Anise’s closest friend and also a participant in the games. Later the two get close with Rhys and Oliver.

8. Who is their enemy?

Officialy the participants of the games only in sporting manner. But mainly the prejudices and tension between the mages since the relationships are still strained after the wars and not every magic type is considered equally powerful.

9. What do they want more than anything?

Anise wants to be sure that her life has meaning, that she is living her life and using her talents the best way she can. Rhys wants to prove himself during the games. Cole wants to show his parents and the magic world he isn't a powerful prince just because of his birth, but because he earned the abilities he possesses. Oliver wants to know if he is good enough for the world.

Basically all characters struggle with feelings of worthlessness and how to feel valuable again.

10. Why can’t they have it?

Anise doesn't know what she wants or what she is missing, since she has a meaningful job, but doesn't enjoy her life. Rhys has been looked down upon and mistreated because of his affinity to fire magic (that is considered died out and blamed for causing the Era of Wars in the first place). Cole as the second prince doesn't get as much attention or recognition.

11. What do they wrongly believe about themselves?

Anise believes her job and magic abilities are the only things that make her valuable. Rhys believes he has to fight to feel alive because he doesn't have any real worth because of his magic.

12. Draw your protagonist! (Or share a description)

Anise is tall and slender girl, has long golden-blond wavy hair, grey eyes and ivory skin. She has very delicate features and is rather pale. She likes to wear blue clothes.

Rhys is muscular and tall with slightly tanned skin, black curly hair and blue eyes. He is covered in scars, most notably on his arms and on his right cheek.

Cole is tall, but less muscular then Rhys. He has slightly longer black hair, vibrant green eyes and fair skin.

Oliver has short black hair and dark blue eyes. He looks very similar to his older brother Rhys in features. He is 14 so he is short compared to the others.

Plot Points

13. What is the internal conflict?

Anise struggles with finding passion in her job, that despite being meaningful doesn't make her happy. She never knew what she wanted and followed her talent, because she isn't sure if who she really is, beside her talent in magic and intelligence, is worth anything.

Rhys feels empty and starved, frustrated about his life in a dying dimension with magic that marks him to other people as being dangerous and bad. He doesn't know what exactly he is seeking, but only feels alive when he fights and experiences the thrill of it.

14. What is the external conflict?

Anise wants to prove her competence as the dimensional ambassador. That she's self-reliant, mature and responsible enough and can use her magic for a good purpose and be part of something bigger then herself.

Rhys wants to advance and win in the games to prove himself and his worth. He hates being written off because of something he can't change and that is such a fundamental part of himself. Rhys wants to see how far he can go when he gives his maximum despite the conditions set on him by others. He also hates how he can't provide for his younger brother because of the prejudices and limits put on him by others because of his magic.

15. What is the worst thing that could happen to your protagonist?  

For Anise it would be disappointing the king by failing at her task, and therefore failing as a person in her eyes.

For Rhys to go back to his previous life, being frustrated and letting his self-destructiveness destroy him slowly.

16. What secret will be revealed that changes the course of the story?  

What kind of magic is the strongest? What privileges do the most powerful mages deserve? Is it correct and fair to judge someone according to their magic and the level of their abilities? How much does magic actually reveal about the user?

17. Do you know how it ends?  

I have a general idea of the direction the story is headed and I know what the resolutions of the character arcs will be, but I don't have a definite ending. I'm trying to not to spoil myself, because often when I know the ending I lose intersting in writin the story.

18. What is the theme?  

Self-worth, what people see as valuable in others and in themselves, drive, passion, prejudices, life purpose, direction, meaning

19. What is a reoccurring symbol?  

Fire, river, sea, clouds, whirlwind of colours, magical portals

20. Where is the story set? (Share a description!)  

It's set in a number of dimensions that mages can travel through. The first half of the story as well as the place for the games is on non-magical earth so no mage would have an advantage of channelling his original world for magic.

21. Do you have any images or scenes in your mind already?  

Yes I have several scenes in my head, that I’m working on connecting into a logical plot.

22. What excited you about this story?

Magic as important part of the plot and symbol for the themes, the growing closeness between very different people, sibling relationship, friendship bonds and support

23. Tell us about your usual writing method!  

I always start with characters that I stick in different scenarios or in my favourite movies and series or books and let them interact. From those I mostly get inspiring scenes that I try to connect through a plot. Afterwards I work on characterisation, world-building, research details and outline stuff a bit. I also write little snippets that sometimes turn long and can be used as chapters.

[hankalorinczova]

Art, Language, Poetry (Preview)

A is not only the first letter in alphabet, the very beginning of something. The oposite of the end, what makes from nothing something and anything. The inception, the beginning, the iniciative, the origin something so basic. Something so basic, fundamental, vital, classic. Aardvark, that is the insect or animal I am a little afraid of. Because it´s insect and it is not his fault, but my fear of it. It is similar to ant- isn´t it? I don´t know. I hope that it will my original poetical artistic ability show. Aaron´s rod, it´s the name of some flower or plant, because it was in Botanics in my linguistic dictionary. But what did William Shakespeare say about the rose? It had the infinite and eternal story. He said and wrote something that no matter what name would a rose had. It would be still a rose and I think that the entire universe should be glad. Abaca is a textile fibre I really had no clue about. There are a lot of things in the universe I still don´t know about. I really hope that my English is at least level C1. And after learning all this 170 000 English words it will be C2. I should never go aback and make the same mistakes I made in the past. I do hope that every good single thought, word and deed will eternaly last. I always hope I should have an infinite inspiration. To be like Alan Turing and Leonardo Da Vinci- but that´s are an examples, is my infinite aspiration. An abacterial world has a sterile charm and it is absolutely unpersonal universe. Who knows what is happening right now in the universe, while I´m writing this very verse. I believe there are a lot of things happening in the universe right now. But I am not Stephen Hawking so I can´t explain what, why and how. An abacus is something like an early computer, isn´t it? It´s the word I find on the beginning of alphabeth, that´s it. With computers is related Alan Turing, who, in fact created them. What would the entire planet Earth did, said and thought without them? Abaft is a part of a ship and boat. But on some words is hard to make a rhyme. It is so hard to have inspiration so infinite and eternal and to have a tenacity and time. But I should at least try, oh-I am in the third of this page, already. I will be so happy when my works will be done and ready. It depends if abandon is a positive or negative word. It depends if we abandon something good or bad in this world. So it can or could be really neutral and not polar at all. I do hope that I will have an inspiration and I will never fall. But the word abandoned seems to have even more negative meaning. Beacuse it is related to something a person, object or animal, just something. I will or I would like to write a lot of poetry in so many languages. In Bratislava we have and there are a lot of bridges. Abandonment can be again good or bad, according that what we are abandoning. But we should never abandon good things,situation and people, what the universe can bring. We should abandon everything bad, what exists in the entire universe. But it would be different world, different universe and I would´t be writing this exact verse. To abase anybody is usually not good and it is not moral at all. It is always better to call. It is always good to stop any evil from spreading at the beginning. It will never have any happy and evil continuing. Abasement is equal and a synonym to humiliation. It is quite an oposite to aspiration and motivation. It extremely hurts to be demotivated and humiliated. It is better to be positive and motivated. Oh, the next quite negative verb again- to abash is to threaten anything. It can be also considered as ashamed anything or something. I am aware that these verses are not (or maybe they are) pioneering in the entire history of this planet. But I do hope that I will show the oposite and I will prove that I have a talent. To be abashed is usually a synonym to be ashamed of something. Oh, the same unoriginal rhyme- something- anything. I should be so afraid and careful when it comes to these particular rhymes. I hope that I will have so much more inspirational and better times. Abashment is a synonym of shame. But that is a noun and it should be no one´s name. Even some names in history are really absurd and strange. But even a history can radically and positivelly change. To abate is to weaken anything, but probably both physically and abstractlly. Abstractlly it could be some characteristics, while physically there are people, animals, objects. And of course abstractlly there are different subjects. I should finish all of my unfinished works, deeds and projects. The abatement of good things is bad, while the abatement of bad things is good. Some things are so extracurricular, others are basic like food. It depends on a hierarchy of needs and wishes. Otherwise we would be like infinity, angels, fairies or witches. Abatis is an obstacle for trees I cannot explain the other way. I do know it is so complicated to create some words or to say. To say them on a topic or a word which doesn´t sound poetically at all. It might not sound even philosophically, or how does it call? A battery is supposedlly a type of battery, but I have no clue about these things. I could and I should be wiser and more intelligent as the life passes by and what it brings. To create something so universal, versatile and infinite from ordinary words- that´s a challenge. Even though I am not sure this is like Leonardo Da Vinci, Alan Turing or William Shakespeare, if not I hope it will change. Abattoir is a place for birds to live in. It can be long, short, colourful, wide, narrow or thin. Everything can be so different, but is anything the same? The entire universe is so different, diverse and other and that´s its glory and fame. Abaxial is rotated from its axis and it can be really anything. The Earth is rotating around its axis, but that´s a different thing. A different thing and object is also the Sun itself. What rotates around the Earth, oh I hope I didn´t make any mistake or to dishonest the universe itself! Abbacy is a place of residence, something like the complex of palaces. Even Coldplay with Rihanna sang about kings and queens in The Princess Of China verses. The King is also a character from The Little Prince written by Antoine De Saint Exupéry. It is really different than the creation, songs, lyrics and art of singer Katy Perry. Abattial is an adjective from abbacy and we are still talking about residences. Different characters from The Little Prince had different gestures, characters, temperament, dances. The biggest genius was The Little Prince, the writer, the Fox and the Lamplighter. The last one was a real abstract warrior and soul fighter. Abbess is a superior group of nuns and the Lamplighter from The Little Prince didn´t think about himself, he was superior. But when somebody act superior it can be in fact a proof they are morally inferior. Morally inferior objectivelly or subjectivelly- that´s the question! It reminds me of William Shakespeare ,,To be or not to be- that´s the question!” Even though I know that it is unoriginal to quote and to have the same word as a rhyme. It is for another word in alphabet time. Abbey is a place, residence, a palace too. I love writing, dancing, editing videos, painting, drawing, learning too. Of course I like listening to music, what I didn´t mention. I love when every rhyme I already know and I feel the best emotion. Abbot is a person who owns an abbey and it reminds me of The King in The Little Prince book. He can exaggerate, affect, scream, compliment he always everything took. He liked to proclaim and dictate anything to anyone. He would not accept any dictate from someone. To abbreviate something is not always good, I personally don´t like abbreviating my own work. I would´t be happy, satisfied, I would´t be sure. I would be so insecure and unhappy with everything and it would be pity that it is so short. I would like to survive every flight around this planet on every airport. I would´t like to be abbreviated from any life, event, experience, what is generally good. I used this particular word differentlly, it was not so simple as something so vital as food. I used this word not as an explanation of what it is, but in a contex of a sentence. Every language has its own accent, words and different amount of verbal tense. There are so many types and concrete abbreviations in this world. Sometimes the same word means something different and sometimes two words has only one meaning. It is the oposite of this one word. Every language has a different types and categories of abbreviations, acronyms and similar things. Sometimes the universe can even a language some miracles brings. I do know that some of these words has different word orther as they should have, but you have to know first ABC. ABC is something like the alphabeth, the basics, after that you can create and you will see. It is so great to write different things in English language, when I know it fluently and grammatically correct. I believe that when I learn at least 170 000 words in this language or in each languages, it will be perfect. The abdicate is the same case as abandon- it can be good or bad related to what you are abdicating of. Oh, I hope I correctly connected the verb from the preposition. Every creature has in this universe a unique position. To be the best is for some of us the biggest motivation. Abdication is an act of deleting something in our lifes. It can be anything, the verb is abstract it is not concrete like knifes. The language is remembered the best, when it is remembered in context. There is a part in every brain which is called a cortex.

Abdomen is a part of body of any animal, person or creature. Every creature has a unique characteristic and feature. As I write I would like to have an infinite inspiration. In this life and poem I should not repeat and I should have an infinite motivation. Abdominal is related to a part of body as I wrote higher. Inna wrote her lyrics or sang her lyrics with some rhymes such as a fire- higher. Or one of her songs was also a house-like song Take Me Higher. I know that these verses are have the same rhyme, it hurts like a fire. Abdominal aorta is an anatomical expression which sounds like a heart. I try to find in every word the most universal and unique art. Even though as I wrote I probably seem to be no William Shakespeare at all. Oh, but why? Maybe I should not and could not fall. To fall and to have no inspiration. To have rather an endless motivation. Abdominals are type of muscles, but I know it is a next word in an alphabeth, but I should be more poetic. More poetic and universal. The universally, objectivelly beautiful- that´s more than heroic. To have on every word so much inspiration, it seems endless and infinite. In this life, world and dimensions some things and situations are finite. But some of them are eternal, fortunatelly. It is a pity everything good isn´t, unfortunatelly. Abducens nerve is another next word in alphabet which I don´t know the meaning. Oh, I hate the feeling I don´t know something, that´s why I am writing this poem to completely learn the vocabulary of English language. I would like to know all the words in English language or at least 1/10 of them, not only the basic words such as ,,a bridge.” I would like to learn at least 170 000 words from my dictionary in my computer, but probably not all 1 000 000 English words each. I do know that the last verse had a wrong word order, but I did it for art, it is still better to not abduct anything. It was so strange verse, because I used the word ,,abduct” from the dictionary too, as I do in everything. I do have a lot of time for writing this poem and I am writing it for almost 20 minutes. It is mine it is not his, hers, yours, ours, it is not its. Abduction is always a criminal deed, it doesn´t matter of who or what. It is still not the worst and the most evil deed in history, as someone could thought. The most evil deeds in history are topics I don´t like to write about, not at all in an art. Because it doesn´t deserve to be mentioned, said, made, written and called. Abductor is a criminal, but what about an abductor in more poetic meaning? As a Romanian singer Andreea Banica sang ,,Hot De Inimi” or ,,The Thief Of Hearts”, it´s kind of thief or an abductor, it has a similar meaning. It sometimes seems that I perceive the associations metaphorically with the speed of light. Oh, I wish it would be like that I would´t have to wait and fight. To fight with the feeling of no ideas in my brain, or in, on, above, beyond, abeam. Slovak series Bud Bindi is similar a lot to a great British comedian Mr. Bean. Mr. Bean or Rowan Atkinson, as it´s his real name, he is a Capricorn like me and he seems to be inspired a lot of by Charlie Chaplin himself. There are a lot of actors and comedians inspired and thought by or with Charlie Chaplin himself. Charlie Chaplin star sign was the last decade of star sign Aries and Aries are so active, not to be lieying abed. Some Aries are and were so good and genius as for example Leonardo Da Vinci or Charlie Chaplin, some others were so idiotic and bad. It all depends, sometimes not only on astrology. It is all about the science and psychology. Abelian group and now the next word in an alphabeth, now from the sphere and dimension of Mathematics. I have no clue and idea what does it mean, I don´t know even the Chemistry and Physics. But I think it is the matter of fact that all three fields Alan Turing knows absolutely perfect. He would be worth of objective admiration of every atom in the universe, he would be worth it. Aberrant is a synonym for strange, weird and offensive and also obscene. Yesterday we were on a famous, genius, legendary and perfect William Shakespeare- Taming Of The Shrew, but there were also some erotic scenes. He was an absolute word polymath and I believe he did have English not C2 level, but D2 and I believe he knew even more than 170 000 words. 170 000 words are in the modern dictionary of English language in my computer. Oh, with that vocabulary, it would transport us to different worlds. To be aberrated could be good and bad, but oh, I started this verse with ,,to be” and what does it reminds you to? ,,To be or not to be? That is the question.” But this shouldn´t be all quoting the genius masterpieces of other creatures. As I wrote, that every creature has unique, exceptional, odd, different characteristic feature. And so does every colourful, different, antique or modern furniture. Aberration is somenthing, anything what is so odd. It could be new, it could be also old. In any eras of the existence of this planet there are many odd creatures, things, places, situations. It can bring, create and make a lot of aspirations and inspirations . To abet is to seduce or persuade someone somehow somewhere. On Friday we are going to Vienna with school, and I would like to know exactly where. I know we are going to see the universe of art, more exactly the fine art. Every art is and should be interesting, fascinating, original and smart. What would the abeyance of the entire universe or just the time look like? Would be everything stopped? Even in the universe Laika? I do know that subject is first in English sentence, but I did it only for the poetry. I do like fish, lamb but I like pork, beef less and I love poultry. When I am wrtiting this art I do hope that I am the oposite of the word abeyant, which is ,,lazy”. Oh, how I wish I had a vocabulary of any language at least 170 000 words, but I should learn like crazy. Regardless to be like anybody anyhow anytime anywhere. The mankind would and should stop any wars and just stare. There are people who couldn´t and shouldn´t be named that I do abhor. The atitude to these people should be like in Harry Potter- That Who Cannot Be Named or You Know Who. Evil doesn´t deserve to be thought, said and not at all made too. I think I am objective and true, but I don´t know what do you. Abhorrence is anything what is annoying, horrible and terrible. It is simple, primitive, but people use to think that is is intelligent and a riddle. But this opinion is wrong, false and subjective. Every evil is merely primitive and stupid and that is objective. Abhorrent is also the adjective of the abhorrence as I wrote higher and sooner. The sooner something is, the more it is in the past. Every work of art and masterpiece should last. It should last infinitely and eternally regardless of how old is the past. Abidance is the tenacity, permanency and persistence. It could be also described as the adhesiveness, but I hope I used correctlly the word ,,adhesiveness” in this sentence. I am no word polymath yet and my English is not perfect enoughto be able to create new words. The more new words someone creates, the more he is closer to the telepathy and other worlds. To abide is to bear to get over and it is interesting, because the bear is also an animal. Some art, things, people, situation are maximalistic, the others are minimal. It all depends on time, space, situation and who, where, what, when, why questions. But there are one more important, fundamental, vital, crucial and basic questions.

[scripturehomosexuality]

Evolution and Same-Sex Activity: How the Former Encourages Contempt for the Latter

Even with all its rules and regulations, modern sexual philosophy pivots on a single belief. The belief is that same-sex eroticism is inherently abnormal and aberrant, and should be treated as such. This blog has demonstrated the many ways this philosophy functions, especially through the labeling system of “straight” and “gay”.

To be clear, it wasn’t difficult to understand the many ways it functioned. However, it was much harder to understand how it was justified. It was difficult to see why, in the face of contradictory evidence, certain authorities still staunchly believed in modern sexual philosophy.

At this point, I think that the theory of evolution is a major anchor of belief. I will make that case now, through two different articles that have overlapping elements.

Insight From Media Output: The Vox Article

My interest was first aroused by a Vox article from January 2018. It is entitled “Proof that Americans are lying about their sexual desires”, which was written by Sean Illing. It contained an interview with researcher Seth Stephens-Davidowitz, who wrote the book “Everybody Lies”. The book looked at Google and PornHub search results around the country. Those results were used to make conclusions on Americans’ everyday behavior, and whether that lined up with popular notions.

The results were noteworthy, but not surprising to this writer. Based on the data, Mr. Stephens-Davidowitz made the following conclusions: that “there are more gay men in the closet than we think” and “a lot of straight women watch lesbian porn”.

First of all, he quickly saw that “gay” men weren’t the only ones who watched “gay” porn. In fact, that was far from the truth, since a sizable number of “straight” guys watched “gay” porn too. Furthermore, viewership wasn’t limited to “gay” population centers like New York, San Francisco and Atlanta. Whether it was urban or rural, in the American Northwest or the American South, viewership was at similar levels throughout the country. Based on this, Mr. Stephens-Davidowitz concluded that “a lot of gay men remain in the closet.”

Now, I strongly disagree with characterizing these men as “gay”. As said many times before, this word has contradictory meanings that intrinsically ties same-sex activity to “gay” culture. Most “straight” guys probably wouldn’t rule out fooling around with male friends. However, they would be distinctly uninterested in “gay” culture, especially its obsession with anal sex. Thus, the use of the word is inaccurate. But that is an argument for another day.

Secondly, he also found that “about 20 percent of the porn women watch is lesbian porn…a lot of straight women watch lesbian porn.” As such, husbands should worry “whether their wives are more physically attracted to women than men.”

I also have strong disagreement with that conclusion. It displays how, in the “Straight”-”Gay” Dichotomy, bisexuality cannot seriously be considered real. It cannot recognize that if women love other women, it doesn’t mean that they love their husbands any less. It’s the same with men. Same-sex love and opposite-sex love simply exist in two different spheres. Again, that’s an argument for another day.

The real gem comes from the following paragraph from the article, which I will quote in its entirety:

“I have always wondered how homosexuality made it through evolution. Like, isn’t evolution supposed to make people desire heterosexual sex with fertile people? But after studying porn, I realized homosexuality is hardly the only desire that doesn’t make sense from an evolutionary perspective.”

Note the thought implicit in these sentences. From an evolutionary standpoint, same-sex desire doesn’t make sense. He can’t see how it can survive in the human race. As a result, he feels justified in saying that a fair number of men are closeted “gays”, and that husbands should worry if their wives are “gay”. In his view, same-sex desire is abnormal because it’s an evolutionary aberration.

In other circumstances, I wouldn’t have focused on that paragraph. Then I saw something written 11 years earlier, which was highlighted by the Man2Man Alliance.

Insight From Media Output: The Man2Man Alliance Post

The post was commentary on a New York Times article from January 25th 2007. The article covered the studies done by Dr. Charles Roselli, a researcher at Oregon Health and Science University.

For the previous five years, Dr. Roselli had focused his attention on rams and their reproduction. He was researching why 8 percent of rams have sex only with other rams, and not with ewes. This involved dissecting perfectly healthy rams to analyze brains, in the quest to see what made them “gay”. In the article, he said that he killed 18 a year for his studies. This means that at the time of the article, he had killed about 90 rams for his research.

PETA and LGBT advocacy groups were up in arms about his research. PETA was against any kind of animal research, and considered Dr. Roselli’s research to be especially outrageous. The LGBT advocacy groups were concerned that he might successfully find the “gay” gene. So they felt the gene might be used to eliminate same-sex desire in humans.

Now, admittedly the word “evolution” never appears in the article. However, the story is full of its concepts and ideas. Those concepts reveal the underlying intent of Dr. Roselli’s research.

For example, he said that the purpose was to “understand the fundamental mechanisms of sexual orientation in sheep…to seek ways to determine which rams are likeliest to breed”. Even at this point, we can see evolutionary concepts at the forefront. Implicit in the statement is the idea of natural selection. According to that idea, traits that increase survival are passed from one generation to another. Traits that don’t eventually fade away. As such, it also focuses on which varieties of animals are likeliest to survive.

This should clue you into the real purpose of the study. It’s not just concerned with breeding. Instead, it intends to study an evolutionary abnormality. To be specific, it’s studying something that supposedly inhibits reproduction, yet stubbornly exists in spite of natural selection.

As a result, they are unspoken assumptions being made in his research. Though he never says it openly, evidently Dr. Roselli views same-sex attraction is abnormal, and perhaps even unnatural. Thus, it poses a threat that must be studied and researched.

At this point, I must repeat a point made by Alliance founder Bill Weintraub. In 2007, there was nothing amiss with the sheep population. In the 11 years since that article, I can’t remember hearing of a crisis involving sheep. Plus, 8 percent is a very small segment of the overall population. So why was this such a pressing issue? The only answer is that he thinks it’s abnormal, and threatening enough that it can’t be ignored or accepted.

That’s not all. The article then quotes a press release, which says that the study “also has broader implications for understanding the development and control of sexual motivation and mate selection across mammalian species, including humans.”

In other words, the research wasn’t just focused on rams and ewes. Nor was it focused on passive observation. Another aim was to study how its findings could be applied to humans. It was with the aim of inculcating “normal” attractions in both rams and humans.

By the way, in case you were wondering, his research continues until now. He did an interview during 2013 on the same studies.

In any case, we can now make conclusions based on what we’ve seen.

Why Evolution Views Same-Sex Activity as Abnormal, and the Consequences

Over the past few years, the blog has shown the various mechanisms of modern sexual philosophy. It has shown how it is structured, and what that structure is based on. It has also shown how it has evolved, and what has spurred its evolution. It has also shown the various ways that philosophy has affected society.

Even during all that, there was always a question that seemed unanswerable. I could never figure out how this philosophy was being justified in people’s minds. In the face of mounting statistics and vast historical evidence proving that same-sex desire is normal, I couldn’t understand how the prejudice against it continued to endure. I also couldn’t understand how the “Straight”-”Gay” dichotomy survived in spite of that evidence.

Now, I think I have found that justification, or at least one part of it. From what can be seen, it is a consequence of the theory of evolution, and our society’s embrace of it.

According to that theory, and as referenced before, humans shed undesirable traits as they evolve to their highest potential. Undesirable traits are those that inhibit a species’ survival, including those that don’t help reproduction. Obviously same-sex activity can’t produce children, so in the eyes of the theory, same-sex desire is extremely undesirable. According to the theory, it should have been wiped out a long time ago. Since same-sex desire endures despite that, it is viewed as a strange anomaly, and as such theory proponents feel obliged to treat it that way.

It is purely an ideological stance that relies on an egregious logical fallacy. That fallacy involves denying the antecedent, where if X is true, Y is true, and since X is false, Y must be false. In this case, the fallacy looks like this -

If a trait results in reproduction, that trait is desirable and normal

Same-sex activity doesn’t result in reproduction

Therefore same-sex activity is neither desirable nor normal

By that logic, supporters of evolution feel justified in looking down their noses at same-sex desire. In their view, it’s a clunker that stubbornly refuses to go extinct. It’s a archaic and regressive condition that should have gone the way of the dodo, and yet it’s still here. As a result, why does homoeroticism deserve the respect that heteroeroticism receives?

This thinking helps explain how homoeroticism is treated throughout popular discourse in the U.S.

For example, this explains the view of most U.S. politicians toward homoeroticism, even those who embrace the LGBT-identified population. Quite a few of them might be sincere. However, that sincerity is usually based on a false premise - that same-sex behavior is a condition, and not an activity. If they don’t mind same-sex activity, it’s not because they view it as something normal. Instead, it’s because we don’t know what to do about it yet, and thus tolerating it is better than oppressing it. On the surface, such an attitude appears benevolent. However it’s actually quite patronizing, since it views homoeroticism as something to be pitied, and not something to be respected.

This also explains how most American residents view same-sex desire. In popular discourse, there’s a need to constantly justify being attracted to the same gender. It doesn’t matter if the people involved are “straight” or “gay”. To most of them, same-sex desire cannot be treated as something that simply exists. That would imply that same-sex activity is normal and natural, which is an unacceptable thought. A recent blog post on teen forums shows this clearly, where forum users excuse same-sex activity as the result of extreme horniness, teen curiosity, or bouts of “experimentation”. Others say that people into the same gender are somehow intergendered. Regardless of the reason given, all of them imply that same-sex desire isn’t a normal phenomenon, and must be caused by some quirk.

This gives another reason why within the “Straight”-”Gay” dichotomy, bisexuality is deeply and strenuously repudiated. Within that dichotomy, opposite-sex desire is “normal”, while same-sex desire is abnormal. The theory of evolution merely gives false legitimacy to that thinking. The “normal” and “abnormal” should not mix, which is what happens in bisexuality, which is why it’s hated so much. If the supposedly “abnormal” freely mixes with the “normal”, it implies that the nominally “abnormal” really isn’t. In the ideology of evolution, such an idea is unacceptable.

Most of all, this is why modern sexual philosophy presents itself as scientifically advanced. In its own view, it merely brings the theory of evolution to its logical conclusion, and that theory is one of science’s highest achievements. Modern sexual philosophy is simply a product of that line of thinking. As a result, its believers become entangled in an ideological trap that blocks them from accepting what statistics and history clearly show. The trap is this - if one believes themselves to be scientifically astute, they are obliged to believe that same-sex activity isn’t normal.

Problems Caused By This Thinking

Obviously, this belief contains and causes substantial problems.

To start off, its central assertion - that same-sex activity isn’t normal - is an appalling lie. This blog is full of content that disproves it. It contains statistics that blows that all away. It contains history (both ancient and recent) show that same-sex activity (excluding anal) was neither an abnormality nor an anomaly. That includes a multipart series on everyday nudity which clearly displays the homoeroticism inherent in most humans. It has content showing that before the late 20th century, not even Christianity believed that to be true.

Furthermore, the thought supporting the belief - that same-sex activity doesn’t help reproduction - is also false. While it’s true that same-sex activity cannot directly produce children, it does play an indirect role. The Man2Man Alliance reports that, when married members sexually interact with other men, their relationship with their wives actually improve. This is because, as Mr. Weintraub says in another post, “[the male-male interaction] makes them happier as Men, and better able therefore to make their wives happy.” Improved relationships turn into better and more frequent sex, which increases the chances for reproduction. Thus, no matter how you slice it, this belief is totally wrong.

To be clear, these lies have all kinds of consequences. For instance, they likely dictate how the “gay” movement conceptualizes same-sex activity. Remember that like “straights”, they also believe that same-sex activity is abnormal and aberrant, and should be treated that way. The theory of evolution merely legitimizes that belief, and partially because of their fraught relationship with religion, most “gays” believe in evolution. By its thinking, same-sex activity simply cannot exist on its own terms. For instance, same-sex activity cannot rightfully be non-penetrative, as is the case with frot. That would give those practices a validity that, in the eyes of evolution, is completely undeserved.

As a result, to achieve some kind of respectability, same-sex activity must ape opposite-sex activity. If opposite-sex activity is best fulfilled through penetration, same-sex activity must be the same. In order to be legitimate, in the words of Mr. Weintraub, “gay” sex must try its best to be “straight”. Since “straight” men insert their penises into human orifices (vaginas), “gays” must insert theirs into human orifices (anuses) too. Since only heteroeroticism is supposedly “normal”, only it can set the standard for “full genital maturity”. Since homoeroticism is “abnormal”, they must follow that standard if it ever hopes to be considered somewhat “normal”.

They also affect how LGBT-identified people view themselves. Think about it: it’s driven in their minds that the homoeroticism they perceive is helplessly abnormal. Since they are predisposed to it, and to an extent they can’t ignore, they believe that they themselves are “abnormal”. They believe that they are a completely different species from “straight” people, and that they must walk their own lonely journey through life, because the majority of people can’t give them any guidance.

This thinking can cause all kinds of psychological issues, and often does. It can cause low self-esteem, since they internalize the belief that they are abnormal and thus inferior. As such, they feel that they cannot carry themselves with much self-respect. They might also feel obligated to pursue other activities labelled abnormal, even if they are objectively dangerous. They might feel obliged to immerse themselves in fisting, rimming, and bugchasing. Since those are considered abnormal, and because they are also “abnormal”, those activities seem to be a perfect match. They feel comfortable labelling themselves “cumdump whores”, because in their minds, that’s all they’ll ever be.

Conclusion

I think it has become obvious that the theory of evolution doesn’t have effects only on science. It has also had an effect on how people view sexual attraction and sexual activity. It has been used to justify the belief that homoeroticism is abnormal, and that it cannot be treated with any respect.

To be clear, I don’t think the theory played an role in the development of “homosexuality”. Other processes were more instrumental in making it into a modern behemoth, especially since it didn’t refer to all homoeroticism until the 1980s. Instead, its role is a very late development. The theory is being used for hasty justification in the face of scrutiny.

Furthemore, I’m not advocating that the theory of evolution should be completely abandoned. I also have no desire to enter the debate on the theory’s veracity, because that’s beyond the scope of this blog.

However, I also think that this aspect of the theory deserves deeper scrutiny. The theory simply cannot explain why same-sex eroticism endures in human beings, and shouldn’t be used as a way to find an explanation. We must admit that, on this aspect of the human experience, the theory of evolution is just plain wrong.

And if belief about its supposed abnormality persists, let’s plainly call it for what it is: ideological posturing to keep this theory from admitting fundamental errors. It is posturing that ultimately hinders its own advancement.

As a result, we must accept that same-sex activity doesn’t need justification. Instead of shaping data to fit ideological reasoning, we should let the reasoning be shaped by the data. We must accept that same-sex eroticism is a natural and normal part of human beings, and that the LGBT world represents a very narrow understanding of it.

Other understandings do exist, and this blog can help you explore them.

Thus, I urge you to read further on this site, to explore another way to think about same-sex activity. I urge you to read “The ‘Straight’-’Gay’ Dichotomy: How It Works”, to fully understand how that system functions. I also urge any who read this to go to “For Straight People (though not exclusively)”, which will point to philosophies and forms of same-sex behavior that don’t hinge on demonstratively false concepts. Also read the page “History of the Concept of Homosexuality”, to see how this concept evolved into its modern day meaning. Don’t be afraid of talking about what you learn to others, because that’s the only way progress will be made.

You don’t need to accept the theory’s explanation for same-sex activity, because it simply isn’t accurate. Healthier ways to understand it exist, and if you let yourself explore them, I’m sure you’ll be better off for it.

Post-Scriptum

A 2008 post from the Man2Man Alliance gives further insight. It is entitled “An Attack on Men Being Together”, and it makes noteworthy remarks on the popular idea that same-sex desire is a biological aberration.

For full disclosure, this is not the first time I saw this page. This was actually one of the first ones I read from the Alliance, which was in early 2016. However, after doing much writing and research, the content took on a new significance.

In context, part of the post concerns correspondence between Alliance founder Bill Weintraub and reader “Gay Episcopalian” (aka Frank). The reader had sent a letter criticizing the Alliance and its approach to same-sex activity. He was especially irked by its statement that same-sex desire isn’t caused by a genetic quirk.

I will quote some parts of the discourse, as Mr. Weintraub responds to each point in the letter.

A few days before this post, Frank had sent this letter:

According to one of the posters on the frottage site, it is impossible for homosexuality to be genetic. The argument is that if it were, it would cease to exist. That is not true!

The fact is that there are genetically determined conditions which preclude the possibility of reproduction. One of them is Tay Sachs disease. It invariably results in death within a few years of birth, and yet it continues to exist. Not being an expert on the subject of genetic diseases, I am unable to recall any other examples, but I assure you that they do exist.

Of course this does not mean that homosexuality IS genetically determined. Rather, it merely proves that it could be genetically determined.

I have no ax to grind on the matter; I’m not much concerned about the etiology. Rather, I am concerned about wiping out the discrimination that those of us who are same-sex oriented must face. I’m particularly concerned about what negative attitudes do to youth who are same-sex oriented.

Mr Weintraub gave the following response to the first two paragraphs:

Who cares?

Look Frank, let me suggest to you that A GENETIC GHETTO IS STILL A GHETTO.

Let’s repeat that:

A GENETIC GHETTO IS STILL A GHETTO.

Isn’t it?

And that’s what you and the gay establishment are busily building.

Another ghetto.

Which you think you need to justify your existence.

I DON’T.

Because I know the historical truth about MEN and about WARRIORS.

Which is that they have loved each other for millenia.

When you buy into the argument that “homosexuality” has to be explained, genetically or otherwise, you buy into your own oppression.

You become your own oppressor.

You do the work of the homophobes – for them.

Why is the gay establishment so hot for a genetic “explanation” for “homosexuality?”

Because it justifies making “homosexuals” into a privileged and protected class.

“Served” by politicians and who in turn are served by political patronage jobs – and monies.

POWER, in other words.

But as I point out on my site, there was a time, not very long ago, when sex between people of the same sex was an activity – not a condition.

And when love, affection, and intimacy between Men was honored.

FOR ITSELF.

Not to make some political point, but because people saw same-sex affection for what it is – WORTHY.

At heart, you and your friends do not.

Instead, you continue to treat “homosexuality” as a pseudo-medical condition, which has to be explained.

How is the genetic “explanation” different from the psycho-analytic [sic]?

Both treat same-sex love as – different, odd, abnormal, and diseased.

It is NOT.

Ater more remarks on the letter, and having concluded direct commentary on it, Mr. Weintraub then said the following to his readers:

So, guys, what you see here, is a typical statement of sentiment from a gay-male who’s been oh-so-well acculturated by heterosexualization into the categories of sexual orientation.

He gets upset when we challenge the status quo – or better put, the DOMINANT PARADIGMS – about “genetics and gays” – and about “masculinity and gays.”

Because those two paradigms work together.

If “homosexuality” is “genetic,” that explains why so many “gay males” are “effeminate” and “need” to take it up the butt.

It’s genetic.

And calls for MEN to reclaim their WARRIOR birthright – by reclaiming their MASCULINITY – can be rejected.

Instead, “gays” can move into a tighter and tighter ideological and communal embrace with the “transgendered.”

Where the issue is not one of guys being free to love and be affectionate with and have sex with other guys –

but one of identity politics:

“I’m gay and I IDENTIFY with the transgendered because I’m genetically different and need therefore to imitate a woman during sex.”

And:

“I’m closer genetically to a male who wants to become a female – than I am to other Men.”

In other words, instead of disputing the belief that same-sex desire is abnormal, the “gay” movement enthusiastically supports it. It is because, if that desire is believed to be abnormal, it is the perfect way to make themselves a protected class. It doesn’t matter that they are damaging the image of same-sex love, or that it puts people’s health at risk.

Indeed, Upton Sinclair’s words ring true: “It is difficult to get a man to understand something, when his salary depends on his not understanding it.”

[dukeofriven]

Suuuper gaaaayyyyyy. Anyways, I wanted to say more on why Erina is a festering sack-of-shit garbage person. Firstly, her opinions on food are just objectively wrong. She turns up her nose at ‘common, peasant food’ which is weird on multiple levels: not only can any cook with a modicum of food history be able to explain the extent to which haute cuisine draws upon and is nourished by common peasant traditions (I mean fancy French cuisine itself is nothing but this particular interplay) but there has been a significant trend over the last decade in high cuisine towards rusticism - the locavore movement being perhaps its most visible influence that has bled into the mainstream: the tendency over the last decade-and-change towards deconstructionism of high food culture - both in molecular gastronomy and its diametric opposite in rusticism - is something she seems utterly ignorant of, as though her only experience with food is overpriced French restaurants that cater to the gullible by overloading every plate with a plethora of nonsense. It often seems that she has contempt for simplicity - which seems ridiculous given that her birth culture gave us the elegance of sashimi, a venerable culinary tradition whose masters attempt to perfect the art of serving a single ingredient. Her snobbery towards ‘common’ chefs becomes even more inexplicable given that we are to presume she has some kind of knowledge of great chefs who, as a body, living or dead, come as often from nowhere as from schools if not more so. Redzepi trained as an in-kitchen apprentice. Adrià started as a dishwasher. Keller never went to a school. Massimo trained as a lawyer. Blumenthal worked as a repo man and taught himself cooking at night. THESE ARE SOME OF THE TOP GODDAMN CHEFS IN THE WORLD AND ERINA SHOULD KNOW THIS. Erina’s snobbery is nauseatingly silly - the show needs a Tsundere ice princess because this is fucking anime so Erina is what we get, but contextually it makes no sense. ‘Oh, you cook in a small restaurant?’ SO DID MOST OF THE PEOPLE WITH MICHELIN STARS. I mean her whole goddamn deal is to deny reality based on the fact that this boy from this little kitchen can’t possible cook good food - but the best sushi restaurant in the world, the only one with three Michelin stars, seats ten people and is practically inside a goddamn subway station. If Erina’s argument is that 90s-style haute cuisine was the ne plus ultra of cooking - that any deviation from this was an anathema - then I could accept that as an element of her character, but instead we are given a so-called food ‘expert’ whose mastery is trapped in the 90s and no one else seems to realize this. SECOND: As a writer her otiose critiques make my blood boil. If she was attempting to be the Erik Satie of the culinary world I could give her a pass, but she’s not, so I won’t. We see a couple times that she is more than capable of giving a critique that is actually understandable, but most of the time she would rather speak in pseudo-koans that we’re supposed to take as a really deep understanding of food. But they’re not, because they’re nonsense. Criticism that cannot be comprehended is useless criticism. All Erina does is be cryptically insulting and then act like it’s a public service. Third: Perhaps to a greater degree than any other art form, food is subjective to the consumer. Erina passes judgement as though her word is law - and to be fair, to a certain extent this is true of food critics generally - but Erina’s nonsense of a ‘god tongue’ brings-in a whole new level of absolutism and absurdity. Take salt, for example - there is no way to perfectly salt a meal because everyone’s sodium levels are different. Someone who has spent all day swimming in an ocean is going to have a much higher need of sodium in their food than someone who hasn’t - the body will instinctively respond to the mild sodium deficiency (which is why beach cooks who spent the morning surfing before their shift need to be damn careful while seasoning their dish.) Somewhere around 10% of people find cilantro to taste like soap - always. There is no ‘correct’ amount of cilantro in a dish that won’t taste off to them - they have a fundamentally different palette than other people. Familiarity in youth can breed an appreciation for flavours that might be impossible to learn in adulthood - which is why North American doesn’t do a roaring trade in salmiakki and haute cuisine still hasn’t latched-on to lutefisk (man, what is it with Scandinavia?) That doesn’t even begin to get into shit like allergies - the God Tongue decrees that this is the right amount of peanuts in this dish, enjoy that anaphylactic shock. My point is that, unlike my opinions, there is nothing objectively right with flavours - more-or-less. The whole model of haute cuisine is predicated on certainly truths - quality ingredients, dedication to craft - that I don’t deny, but the idea of a ‘god tongue’ stretches my suspension of disbelief to the breaking point because it doesn’t mean anything. Why would any restaurant give a shit what this haughty supertaster thinks about anything - her gross mutant palette is so hilariously oversensitive it’s pointless to try and satisfy itand- besides: none of their customers will notice the alleged ‘flaws’ because they’re not garbage mutants like her. If she had a ‘God Eye’ and complained that your 100000x100000 pixel image had a single mis-aligned pixel, you probably wouldn’t give a shit because none of your customers are humanly capable of noticing the discrepancy so there’s zero point wasting time and money fixing it. Seeking Erina’s approval would be a waste of any company’s resources: just get a likeable celebrity to sing your praises. Fourth: Erina has fans in the school, which is weird because she’s such a  relentless horrible person who is rude and nasty to essentially everyone she meets, and holds shokugeki solely for her own personal enrichment. I would get it is people cheered her as a villain because hey - everyone loves a heel - but instead they hold her in awe... I guess because of her cooking prowess, but prowess didn’t stop people from hating Subaru, another nasty piece of work. People cheer Erina because the narrative needs her to have cachet, but she doesn’t even have ‘mean girl’ charm - the catty queen bee who rules the school even though she’s nasty. She’s not funny, has no sense of humour, no ability to talk to other people - absolutely nothing going for her other than her skills as a chef which, again, didn’t do much for Subaru. Everyone should be showing up to boo Erina - god, it would make her so much more effective if she fed off their hatred and negativity, her ego swelling as she ‘proved’ herself right again and again, spitting in the face of all the haters. Instead we get the super-popular charmless asshat who everyone is gaga for for no discernible reason. In conclusion, Erina Nakiri doesn’t know anything about food and lacks self-awareness of the echo-chamber of her own unjustified snobbery. She’s literal garbage.

[skelliet-0-n]

The Terrible Politics of PS4′s Spider-Man

This Spider-Man guy likes beating up criminals a little too much.

The DLC for the PS4 Spider-Man recently went on sale, so my housemate bought it, and I’ve started playing it again. Full disclosure, I love the gameplay. It seems a direct spiritual successor to the PS2's Spider-Man 2 game, and it's endlessly freeing to effortlessly swing from skyscraper to skyscraper.

But in the process of obsessively completing missions to unlock the underpants outfit, I’ve become reacquainted with how confused and abhorrent the politics of Spider-Man are. It’s largely in relation to the police, the NYPD, which has always had a fraught relationship with Spider-Man throughout his existence - comics, films, and games.

But this time, it feels utterly unlike any previous incarnation - while this relationship remains fraught, it’s only in terms of how the police view Spider-Man (only in the sense that he’s doing their job for them). Spider-Man, on the other hand, is unwavering in his adoration of the NYPD, the ‘brave boys in blue’. This is deeply troubling, for obvious reasons - Spider-Man is the point-of-view character, and in a world increasingly disgusted at the wanton violence, racism, and lack of accountability displayed by not just the US police force, but indeed police forces worldwide, it’s utterly tone-deaf.

The police in Spider-Man are best represented by Jefferson Davis, an average police officer and father of future Spider-Man Miles Morales. Davis is a good cop - noble, self-sacrificing, and community-minded. This is how Spider-Man perceives the force at large, rarely forgetting to thank those brave boys in blue for their service. Spider-Man’s internal dialogue often references the supposed friction between him and the police, but you’d never know from the actual cops in the game, and he nevertheless goes out of his way to support them.

You could argue that this is an aspirational representation - what the writers want the police to be. But there are a few problems with this. First, the police aren’t really all that great - it’s just that the immoral things they do in the real world are ignored, whitewashed. Some of them are generally antsy around Spider-Man himself, but equally, many are adoring (and of course, Spider-Man himself is similarly adoring of the police force).

The other problem with it foregoing a real-world representation for an idealised representation is the fact that Spider-Man already engages with other real-world representations. Jonah J. Jameson has forgone his role as newspaper editor to play talkback radio host, his wild accusations and angry ranting a clear analogue to Alex Jones. Norman Osborn, meanwhile, has become mayor in this story, rather like another high-profile businessman turned populist politician. So, to ignore the reality of the police force is irresponsible, given that the game already critiques existing institutions (admittedly, institutions that are safe to critique by the standards of liberal defenders of the status quo). 

There’s even condemnation levelled at the fascist paramilitary organisation Sable, which continues to overstep its boundaries, depriving people of their civil rights. Spider-Man takes the time to (with utter lack of self-awareness) shake his head at this, declare that it's not how things are done in New York - before going right back to gushing over the NYPD. In 2018, the NYPD held a transgender Latina woman overnight, charging her with ‘false personation’, misgendering her, and mocking her. If that doesn’t sound like an autocratic organisation depriving people of their rights, acting above the law, and being an antagonistic force towards parts of the community, then God knows what is.

This is equally an issue with Brooklyn 99, arguably the world’s most influential fictional representation of the police force. Again, it shamelessly portrays the police as fundamentally good, despite the inclusion of the rare bad cop. Instead, the show depicts the NYPD as being diverse in terms of race and sexuality, though if the above example proves anything, it’s that this is far from the truth. It’s not just ineffectual wishing for a better tomorrow, it’s actively creating a false narrative, one that is irresponsible in its refusal to acknowledge the harm that police forces do.

On the one hand, you could say that Spider-Man is no more problematic than crime fiction, in its black-and-white moral of order versus chaos. Superheroes and crime fiction are inextricably intertwined, are they not? But Spider-Man goes further - it brazenly dehumanises criminals (by ‘criminals’ I mean the everyday criminals, not the supervillains, who get complex backstories), reducing them not to victims of circumstance and poverty, but simply to animals that long for destruction and self-gain. Of course, Spider-Man could never give every two-bit goon a backstory, but it goes too far the other direction. Crime is some sort of malevolent force, completely other from ‘normal’ humans. Criminals are some sort of vicious, orc-like beings (and lest we forget, even Tolkien had trouble reconciling the moral implications of orcs, sentient beings who were apparently pure evil and less-than-human).

To return to Brooklyn 99, the first episode demonstrates the two lead characters (both model cops) in a race to see who can arrest the most people. Sure, it’s treated as comedy, but it’s still tone-deaf against the context of real-world abuses of police power, and presents criminals as abstracted, shapeless masses that police have to dispose of to keep us all safe. There’s not even the slightest acknowledgement of the complex socio-economic circumstances that lead many to actions that are considered crime.

45% seems way too high to me.

This article explains, better than I ever could, the dehumanisation of criminals in Spider-Man. In particular, there’s a contrast between the in-game Riker’s Island, a hive of scum and villainy, and its real-world counterpart, a prison full of disadvantaged groups, trapped by a system constructed to keep them down.

Even Spider-Man’s dialogue demonstrates this. In every crime-busting side mission, Spider-Man seems to view criminals as misbehaving children. Spider-Man’s gleeful efforts to return them to prison are jarring and distasteful, compared to real life, where revolving door prison systems keep minorities and low-income people beaten down, thanks to the serious handicap of being labelled a criminal.

Spider-Man’s tone-deaf dialogue shines through again in describing the cops. Coming across a shootout between police and escaped convicts (again presented as thoughtless marauders), he compares the scene to a Wild West setting, of brave lawmen engaged in a firefight in some urban canyon. And then there’s Spider-Man’s juvenile, faux-serious self-narration as 'Spider-Cop’. It’s ironic that Spider-Cop evokes a child’s efforts to play a cop; such a child would have, no doubt, a largely positive view of the police, thanks to media representation such as Spider-Man’s pro-police narrative.

Maybe the game exclusively presents police as noble heroes because the writers tacitly approve of their real-world heavy-handed treatment of minorities. After all, Spider-Man himself declares drug-dealing to be his 'least favourite criminal activity', and while he corrects himself to say it’s one of his least favourites, it’s very telling that he has such a strong reaction to a crime that, in the US, has largely been used to victimise minorities and opposition to the elite. During the Nixon administration, for example, the criminalisation of heroin and marijuana was used as an excuse to harass the black and anti-Vietnam communities respectively, neither of which were friends to Nixon.

As a side note, the clear association between Alex Jones and Jonah J. Jameson is evidence of Spider-Man’s uncertain message, much like the imbalance between the critique of Sable and the lionisation of the NYPD. While he starts out as a bitter, conspiracy-theorising radio host with a clear vendetta, he starts to make intelligent, sane points. For example, he starts to question the conflicting interests of Osborn, a capitalist who has been elected mayor of New York (again, an obvious allusion to Trump). He also urges citizens to fight for their rights in the face of Sable’s abuse of power - is he supposed to be a satirical lunatic, or one of the few sane voices? In a world as black-and-white as Spider-Man’s, a character like Jameson just seems confused.

To return to the point, perhaps this begs the question, what’s the right way to depict the police? Maybe, if you’re not going to take any kind of stand on the injustice they commit, you shouldn’t depict them at all in a piece of fiction, especially if it’s something fun and light-hearted like Spider-Man or Brooklyn 99. Admittedly, in the case of the latter, that would necessitate it not existing, but then, you wouldn’t write a buddy comedy about two US troops in the Iraq War, would you?

DISCLAIMER: You could say that it’s just a game, and that politics should be kept out of this. But those who say they’re apolitical really just mean they’re content with the status quo - everything is political. Especially if it depicts an organisation like the police.

[sowingseedsandshootinghoops]

Overcoming Man: The Story of Nietzsche and the Ubermensch

A note on the text: I used Walter Kaufman’s translation of Frederich Nietzsche’s Thus Spoke Zarathustra as published by Penguin Books in 1978

              “What is great in man is that he is a bridge and not an end” (15).

Nietzsche is has become the boogie man of 19th century western philosophy. The guy who blamed for,among other things, the rise of Nazism (a philosophy he more than likely would have denounced) and the perceived stripping away of value from life. Nietzsche is a very odd writer, and in many ways that work which many consider to be his magnum opus, Thus Spoke Zarathustra, is equally odd. Odd because of the beautiful, poetic, some might even say hypnotic, language that he uses, but also because un-nihilistic his worldview is. The ubermensch (or “overman” as Kaufman translates it) is a person who is able to take control of their life and infuse extraordinary amounts of meaning and value into their lives.

The first thing one should probably do when talking about the overman is point out that the overman isn’t something that you are. It is something that you become: “There is was too that I picked up the world ‘overman’  by the way and that man is something that must be overcome- that man is a bridge and no end: proclaiming himself blessed in view of his noon and evening, as the way to a new dawn” (198). He would not support the direction that the Nazis took his idea; one cannot have a race of such beings because they, in some sense, don’t exist. He does not espouse any kind of idea of racial superiority. 

He also rejects the idea that man, as currently constructed, was made to be what he currently is. We are, as it were, simply one more step on an evolutionary chain. I remember as a child reading a story in National Geographics about a skull of a man with no teeth that had just been found. What had shocked scientists at the time of the discovery was that they could prove that he had lived for many years after he had lost all his teeth which means that someone had to have mashed up his food and fed it to him; making this the first act of charity ever recorded. The human skulls that we have from earlier eras show us that the part of the brain from which compassion arises simply did not exist. They would not even have understood what compassion was, and yet however many years later this completely unique and previously unheard of trait was exhibiting itself. Nietzsche thinks that we are still on the same path and are due for a similar type of transformation. To have become an overman means to have stepped into a different level of consciousness. It means, in effect, to have at least started the process of becoming a “new man”. It also means that you have done this not only for yourself but have opened the door in such a way that others could go through too.

In further describing the essence of the overman Nietzsche writes that 

man is something that shall be overcome. What have you done to overcome him? All beings so far have done something beyond themselves; and do you want to be the ebb of this great flood and go back to being beasts rather than overcome man? What is ape to man? A laughing stock or a painful embarrassment. And what will man be to the overman? A laughing stock or an embarrassment (12).  

Not only is the overman a real person, but there have been overmen before: Christ was one, Moses was one, as were Mohammed and Buddha among others. Even the historical Zarathustra was one. These were all people who fundamentally changed the way that people thought about themselves and the world around them. They each showed humanity a different way of seeing the world and themselves, and brought with them a whole system of values. So, it is obvious that to Nietzsche the overman is not some sort of being that exists outside of history that then imposes himself onto our world. Any one of us has the potential to become an ubermensch and lead mankind into a higher level of being. 

Now the question is what has stood in man’s way and prevented him from making further advancements in this “field”? What has kept him from reaching this new level of consciousness more effectively? For Nietzsche the answer is not just religion but any kind of preaching that emphasizes another type of existence as being inherently more preferable to this one. The preaching of the kingdom of Heaven has made people feel like it isn’t worth improving life on this earth and pushing man towards that higher level of existence. In fact one of the first tenants that he preaches in this book is that “people should remain faithful to the earth” and not believe “those who speak to [them] of otherworldly hopes! Poison mixers are they, whether they know it or not. Despisers of life are they, decaying and poisoned themselves of whom the earth is weary: so let them go” (13).  He goes on then to say more explicitly that it was the 

sick and decaying who despised and the earth [who] invented the heavenly realms and redemptive drops of blood. . . . They wanted to escape their own misery and the stars were too far away for them. So they sighed, ‘Would that there were heavenly ways to sneak into another state of being and happiness!’ Thus they invented their sneaky ruses and bloody potions. . . . Listen rather my brothers to the voice of the healthy body: that is a more honest and purer voice. More honestly and purely speaks the body that is healthy and perpendicular: and it speaks of the [true] meaning of earth (33). 

His issue is not with the fact that such people have found a problem with life on earth, Nietzsche himself knew all too well that suffering is part of this life, but that rather than focus on making life on this earth better, they projected all their hopes and desires onto this other plane. They didn’t decide to focus on improving the world and on bringing everyone around them to a higher level of enlightenment. Instead they let their hatred of their life and the world around them drive them to abandon everything. Remember that Nietzsche grew up Lutheran (and even studied to become a minister) and that a lot of Protestants have a “body negative” view of the world where the flesh is the source of sin and evil and the spirit is the source of all the good in the world. So it’s rather easy to see how he would have seen a lot of religious people as people who essentially hated the world more than anything else. That is the attitude that he rejects above all else. 

The other than thing that Christianity brought to the world, according to Nietzsche, is what he would later call a “slave morality”. It is a morality centered around the weak. In ancient times it was the strong and the powerful who were admired. They were people like Achilles and Hercules. They inspired people to be the best that they could be. In its place Christianity preached that the “meek shall inherit the earth” (Mt 5:5) in one feel swoop made it so that greatness was no longer something to aspire to. Remember again that he comes from a religion that tends to view God has a harsh, and kind of cruel, taskmaster who operates on the basis of a strict determinism. Which is to say that the world is exactly as he intended it to be, problems and all. Which means that it is very, very important that man know his place and not attempt to “overthrow” the system. For a lot of Protestants, more especially Calvinists but probably Lutherans too, free will is either impossible or a very, very, VERY, troublesome thing that causes men to disobey God’s commands. Thus it imposes a “slave morality” onto its subjects where virtues like humility, modesty, and reverence are upheld and virtues that would correspond to the “master morality” are condemned as evil. People are taught to modestly 

embrace a small happiness- that they call ‘resignation’- and modestly squint the while for another small happiness. At bottom the simpletons want a simple thing most of all: that nobody should hurt them. . . . This however is cowardice even if it be called virtue. . . . Virtue is to them what makes one modest and tame: they have turned the wolf into a dog and man into man’s best domestic animal (170). 

What the overman does, essentially, is shake off this slave morality and dare to reach for something higher. Dare to push himself, and mankind as a whole, onto a higher plane of existence. 

Now why does the overman do this? Because he loves the world and the people in it. He wants other people to actualize themselves and become the best version of whatever they are. At one point one of Zarathustra’s followers, who lives in a swamp, is angrily condemning all the other people to Hell and Zarathustra stops him saying: 

Your speech and manner have long nauseated me. Why did you near the swamp [for] so long [that you became] a frog and a toad? Does not putrid, swampy blood run through your veins that you have learned to croak and revile thus?. . . . I despise your despising. . . . Out of love alone shall my despising and my warning bird fly up, not out of the swamp. . . . Where no one can love, there one should pass by (177-178). 

In fact, at one point Zarathustra prays that these “sick” men become “convalescents, men of overcoming and create a higher body for themselves” and then drives the point further home yet again: “Let this be your honor: to always love more than you are loved” (33, 66). So the overman is not the product of a dog-eat-dog mentality. In fact he is driven to do what he does out of love for himself, for his fellow man, and for life. He wants everyone, including themselves, to reach their highest potential and live the best life that they can. 

So he wants people to live lives that are full of meaning! Life is precious and full of value! So the questions remains then, how does one become an ubermensch? Well although Nietzsche believes that every individual’s goal is self actualization, and that will in turn lead, eventually, to the species as a whole entering into that higher plane of existence, he does not believe that humanity as a whole has one particular goal. Which means that there isn’t only one way for the individual to reach that state of self-actualization. The ubermensch is a person who “has discovered himself and [said] ‘this is my good and evil’; with that he had reduced to silence the mole and the dwarf who say ‘good for all, evil for all’” (194). Take responsibility for your own life. Get up, claim, and hold onto what you hold dear even if no one else does. That is how you become an overman and live a life full of meaning- your life has to be full of what might be called personal meaning if it is to be meaningful at all. If you’re unhappy with your life than get up and change it; don’t wait to get to Heaven in order to live the life you want. Live it now, be the person you want to be now. Love your life, don’t throw it away with the hope that something better will come if you just sit and wait patiently for it, and don’t simply follow other people blindly down whatever path they have said you should follow. Not even Zarathustra: “You believe in Zarathustra? But what matters Zarathustra? You are my believers- but what matters all believers? You have not yet sought yourselves and you have found me. Now I bid you lose me and find yourselves” (78). Keep your eyes and ears open and look for the path that you feel drawn to because the path that Zarathustra walks down may not be the right path for you: “This is my way; where is yours?’ Thus I answered those who asked [about] ‘the way’. For such a path does not exist’” (195). Ultimately the goal of every single individual is the same: “Become who you are” (239). Become it because you are not it yet, and realize that who you are is different than who someone else is. Which means that in order to live a life that is meaningful, you have to embrace and live your life according to statutes that important to you. Transcend what is around you and become the overman what you were meant to be. Don’t settle for mediocrity because you were meant for so much more. Strive for greatness, be great. 

The call to be an ubermensch is far from a call to a life that has no meaning. It is the exact opposite. The call is one to live full of the highest level of meaning. It doesn’t mean settling and saying “Oh well, this is all I have to live for”. No it is a call to love yourself, to love life, and to love each other more passionately. Because there is beauty and truth in the world, there is a meaning to your existence; it’s just up to you to find it, recognize it, and then claim it with every fiber of your being and rise up to meet that challenge. Be who you are.

[riverflowsthroughit]

Author/Firefighter/Pilot, San Francisco - WOWWOMAN.COM

Aren't podcasts great? A voice, and a set of ideas were all I needed to get inspired and carry out bunch of research about the speaker - Caroline Paul. She was discussing her latest book Gutsy Girl, and it rang so true to me, that I was inspired to contact her and learn more. After months of trying to nail down common time, we met in a pub around Haight-Ashbury intersection in San Francisco, took some photos, unnerved hippies with our photo clicking and left knowing that we both participate in some crazy sports and share many other commonalities. Success in my books. It was hard to pin point the title for this post, because Caroline is more than an author, she is an adventurer, and not just adventurer, but think-outside-the-box adventurer. If you ever meet her, ask her to tell you a story involving the San Francisco bay, 4th of July and a kayak. Without further ado. 1. Name. Caroline Paul 2. Where is your hometown? San Francisco 3. What is your profession/career/title/self- label/designation? Writer/retired firefighter 4. What was the journey like to get where you are (career wise)? When was the mental shift to start the journey? (path through navigating all sorts of "male dominated" sports/careers and how you viewed it at the time and how you see it all having perspective, years later. Was it worth it, did it feel like it was "so out of the ordinary?" etc.) There were mental shifts each time I entered a new career, which I have done twice. When I became a firefighter, I was not expecting any seismic changes in my perspective. I had lived a life of pretty grand adventure and joining the San Francisco Fire department seemed an extension of that. I thought Sirens! Adrenaline! Big Fires! Of course, the job was so much more than that, and tested me in emotional ways I had not expected. The courage and integrity needed when doing CPR on a baby or giving oxygen to an elderly man who really just wanted some human contact, or treating the same heroin addict for an overdose for the third time that shift, or pulling dead kids from a crashed car – these far exceeded what it took to run into a fire, for me. It also took me by surprise how difficult it was to assimilate into a culture that was fundamentally male. I had many male friends, and I’d also been a pilot, a whitewater raft guide, and a paraglider and in these milieus I was more often than not one of the few females. But all that was a game compared to the firehouse, where the pressure was really on all the time to prove that I was strong and brave enough to be there. And in some ways it was a fruitless battle, because the sentiment against women ran so deep. It wasn’t unfounded – the job of firefighter is physically difficult – you carry a hundred pounds of equipment on you if you include the coats and boots and axes and airpacks, and THEN you have to work. And remember that Title 9, the law that guaranteed girls equal access to sports, had been only been ratified in 1972. So my generation was the first with a background in physical activity and so the first to embrace a culture of strength, teamwork, and courage. So women didn’t have a deep bench when it came to strong, adventurous women. As a result, I didn’t blame the men for their doubts, but the fact was that there were some of us that were very qualified and came to be trusted parts of a team. Being under such pressure for 14 years was no picnic though – you felt any mistake would reflect on all your fellow female firefighters. There was a flip side; I am very grateful for really understanding on a visceral level what it is to be excluded, what it is to be in the minority and what it is to face deep prejudice. Before that I was a pretty dumb white girl, blind to her own privilege, and all that she had not earned. I do want to say there were many very honorable men who were decent to me whether or not they actually thought I should be there. There were also men who were fine with women on the job, though they did seem to be in the minority. And ultimately I just loved the job – I searched for bodies in the bay on the SCUBA rescue team, I faced huge, raging fires, I birthed babies. Who can say that? 5. Biggest accomplishment since making the (physical/mental) move? After retiring I became a writer and I would say that publishing four books big New York publishers has been a big accomplishment. 6. What was biggest disappointment and plan to overcome it? I published two books without much difficulty. And then I wrote two novels, and two proposals and nothing would sell. Five years of my life! I was devastated and almost gave up writing. But then I wrote Lost Cat, A True Story of Love, Desperation, and GPS Technology, which did ultimately see the light of day. So I dug myself out of that dark hole, through persistence, a little skill, and a lot of luck. There was a small, dark place in my heart that wanted to send Lost Cat reviews and sales numbers to the editors and agents who had rejected that and all my other manuscripts. But the truth is that the writing of each one, rejected or not, made me better at my craft, so nothing was really a waste, nor perhaps should the rejected manuscripts have been loosed on the world. 7. Advice for other women? Persist. 8. Where in the world do you feel “tallest” (i.e. where is your happy place)? 1000 feet in the air, over Tomales Bay in my ultralight. Seeing seals or leopard sharks is a plus. 9. What are some of your favourite sports that may serve as a good spring board to get girls into action and fearless activities? If one had to start slow and get them comfortable with risk? Stand up paddle boarding is very easy to do but it feels badass, bc it’s on water and it can be a little difficult at first. There are also some things to keep an eye on – tides, and winds for example – so it’s a step up from walking down a trail. 10. What is it like staring fear (and I mean major fear, like dying) into face? During your sports, etc.? What was your self-monologue? I know that fear is telling me something, but it’s often not telling me to step down. In many situations the feeling of fear is a reflex or a reaction that has come too late. I was once blown out of a hallway during a fire and as I picked myself up after the explosion I was freaking terrified. But then your brain catches up and you realize, hey, it’s over, you’re fine. The truth is that now the situation had just gotten a whole lot safer – the explosion had happened and now conditions were tenable. Fear wasn’t relevant anymore. It was time to go back into the hallway, and put out the fire. 11. What fears are you still hoping to overcome? My fear of not being perfect. The problem with growing up female in the US is that there is a deep sense you have to do everything correctly and if you don’t you’re bad, but in fact I’ve seen that the most grace comes from simply recognizing you’ve done something wrong, saying sorry, and pledging to do it better next time. I want to be that person. I’ve tried to adopt the mindset that I’m going to be perfect at imperfection, and that has been helping. 12. Anything you'd do differently (if you had another go at life)? Wingsuiting. However I would have to be reincarnated with a tad more common sense and be a little less accident-prone. 13. What inspires you? Women who do rad things. I just saw a documentary about some female BASE jumpers. It’s frustrating that people don’t realize how many women are out there performing brave acts and adventuring at a very high level. For a long time I thought no women did things like wingsuiting bc I hadn’t read about any but I did a little digging and there are a core group. How many, I don’t know, but definitely more than none. And we should know this! 14. What are you hopeful about? That the younger generation will shift everything we are doing and save the world from us. Climate change will be stopped and we will kick fossil fuels and we will somehow reverse our swift overpopulation of this planet. Our wild places will be saved, animals and insects will not suffer or go extinct. Oh, hold it, did you say “hopeful”? I thought you said Pie in the Sky dream. Honestly I am not really a hopeful person. I am hopeful about puppies. But otherwise, not much. 15. What are you reading now? (what books do you gift most and what are your favourite reads?) I gift H.A. Rey’s The Stars. It’s a book on constellations. I think that looking at the sky gives us a sense of our place in the universe, which is, note to humans, TINY. We need to feel infintesimal if we are to survive, is my opinion. Am I on this rant again? Okay, I’ll get off it and add that when you look at the sky and recognize constellations, it’s quite comforting, bc there it is, the same sky almost where ever you go. 16. Who is/are inspiring “WOW Woman” (or Women) in your life (and why)? My twin sister. She is a dogged animal rights activist and all around kickass woman. My partner Wendy MacNaughton is an illustrator and she is the most creative person I know. She hates the word creative, but I don’t know how else to say it. Whatever the word is when someone takes an idea and makes it better/funnier/more poignant. That word. Better yet, she comes up with something that feels totally new, and you think Oh, Right, and your perspective is suddenly changed. Once you look through her work you’ll know what I’m talking about. 17. Where can others find you/your work (links to websites, blogs, etc.)? Carolinepaul.com @carowriter

[gman-003]

Legends - The Legend of Zelda: Skyward Sword Analyzed, Part Two

Levias is an even worse fit. He's supposedly a guardian spirit for Skyloft, but he's never mentioned until the part of the game where you have to go get a MacGuffin from him. After that, he never appears in the story again. I think he gets more total screentime in Hyrule Warriors than in Skyward Sword. He feels like a Link's Awakening reference that was tossed in at the last minute, when it was decided that Skyward Sword was to be the origin myth for the Legend of Zelda series. Games have become a very narrative-focused experience. When the Legend of Zelda series began, all you had was "you're the hero, go rescue the princess from the monster by getting all the magic things". You're still the hero, there's still a princess and there's still monsters and magic things, but the series has gotten a lot more story-focused as time has passed.

That's not, in and of itself, a bad thing. Early games skimped on the story because they didn't have the technical capability to tell it well. The NES basically didn't have the memory capacity for books' worth of text or minutes-long animations. And a story done well is always worthwhile.

But it has to be done well. Is the story of Skyward Sword good? Well... kind of. It has great bits, it has okay bits, and it has some bad bits.

Good: Zelda has agency, Groose has arc

Certain tropes have gotten a lot of flak for their prevalence. The "damsel in distress" trope, the helpless female character who you must rescue, gets some deserved criticism, and the Zelda series has used that trope pretty extensively in past games.

Not here.

Skyward Sword gives us a Zelda who takes action. She does things. In the earliest parts of the game, she sticks up to a bully to protect you. When she gets thrown to the surface world by a tornado, you go to rescue her, only to discover a) she's taking care of herself, b) she's on her own quest, and c) she's actually kind of busy right now, let's try to meet up later, k?

Even when she becomes trapped in a crystal thing... she was the one who put herself there. She had to do some weird magic stuff to keep The Imprisoned... imprisoned, and until you kill the thing for good, she's too busy to come have sloppy makeouts so get off your ass and finish the quest already, Link. Get it together, because she's got hers.

The complaint about the trope is often misused. Tropes are tools, and tools exist to be used (although yes, the extent to which that particular one is used is indicative of problems with our culture's gender roles). Using the damsel-in-distress trope to, say, give the broad strokes of a story because you're on the NES and putting a more detailed story in the game would require cutting out half your gameplay, is perfectly valid. Nintendo could have told a good story even while using that trope... but instead, they gave us a Zelda who felt like a real character, who did real-character things and had a real story of her own.

In Skyward Sword, Zelda has an arc. She has character development. She has growth. She feels like a real person, with internal conflict and personal change. She's an actual good character.

She's not the only one. Groose - who I had pegged at first as the annoying comic-relief character - has an arc. He starts off as a bully - childishly cruel to those weaker, but a coward to those who he can not or will not harm. He sobs inconsolably when Zelda goes missing... until, eventually, his grief is overwhelmed by his envy at Link's exploits, and he tries to usurp him as protagonist, trying to be the one to save Zelda and, he hopes, win her favor. But visiting the strange surface world changes him. He learns to respect others. He finds his courage, helping Link fight a demon. He uses his brain, and not just his brawn. And, eventually, he realizes that Zelda is her own person, that he's doing both of them a disservice by trying to win her.

That's a story right there. That's an arc. It's not one that's well-suited to game form, honestly, but it's great character development. The low-level writing, the words and sentences of dialogue, is never particularly great in Skyward Sword, but the mid-level character crafting is on point.

For everyone except Link.

Okay: Proving your worth to be a hero, not being a hero

Link as a character has one big problem in *Skyward Sword*. He doesn't have agency. He never does things without another character, or several characters, pushing and prodding and guiding and dragging him through the story. His supporting cast is so supportive that he loses his protagonist status - because he gets told to do everything that he does, he becomes merely the pawn for other character's successes, rather than a hero in his own right. He's a bullet fired at Demise by Zelda. He's the dumb meat swinging Fi and the Goddess Sword around. He's the errand-boy of Impa, in two ways.

Link's character arc is barely an arc at all. It's all buildup for almost no payoff. Link spends the first three dungeons trying to prove to Impa that he's good enough to keep up, to not be a liability to her and Zelda. Then he spends three dungeons proving himself worthy of the sacred fires needed to forge the Master Sword. Then he has to go prove himself a hero to the three dragons. Link only "becomes a hero" at the very, very end, when he defeats Ghirahim and Demise - specifically, he becomes a hero when Demise gives him a chance to run away, and Link chases after him instead. So, about fifteen minutes before the credits roll, depending on how much trouble the final battle gave you. (It gave me a lot of trouble, by the way). Other games in the Legend of Zelda series did not make you wait nearly so long. In *Ocarina of Time*, Link gets his first hero moment when he first faces Ganondorf, and draws his sword against the king of evil. In *Wind Waker*, Link shows signs of heroism from the beginning, when he ventures into the forest to rescue a fallen stranger. Perhaps the writers of *Skyward Sword* intended that early moment where Link ventures to the surface in search of Zelda to be that moment where he shows even a sign of heroism... but they sapped it of any meaning by having him be so forcefully prodded into it, by not one but two characters. I was yelling at the screen for them to shut up and let me go on an adventure already, but the cutscene dragged on of Fi and Gaepora telling me how important it is to go on an adventure. (There may be a blog entry entirely about this scene, as well as the role of certain steps of the Monomyth in interactive media, if I feel like it's worthwhile). Link isn't really changed by his adventures. He's learned skills and acquired powers he didn't have before, but he's fundamentally the same character, as far as I can tell. Maybe it's just hard to show a player character developing self-reliance and confidence, because their actions are controlled by the player? But plenty of other games have pulled this off - the 2013 Tomb Raider reboot springs to mind.

That brings up an interesting aside: does the protagonist of the story necessarily have to be the player character of the game? I would argue that Zelda is the protagonist of Skyward Sword's story, even though she's never controlled by the player. Link doesn't take initiative. He starts the game doing things because Zelda told him. When Zelda's gone, he does things because Fi told him, or because a dragon told him, or because someone just asked nicely. Zelda has far more agency than Link, and honestly has a better character arc.

In the end, it was Zelda that defeated Demise, not Link. Link might have been the one swinging the sword, but the victory was arranged by Zelda. She (as Hylia) placed all the tools Link needed in the places he would get them, and kept The Imprisoned from escaping until Link had assembled all the pieces necessary to kill it.

And even though I'm not sure the Legend of Zelda gameplay formula would be the best fit for such a story... I kind of wish I had been playing as Zelda instead. Or maybe playing as Impa, since she had lots of action going on, but was more closely involved with the story's protagonist. Either one seems like it could have been a good game.

Bad: Elements out of place

While Link is a bad fit for the protagonist role, he's at least a good fit for the player character role, and his story isn't jarringly bad. But there are elements that seem much more out of place.

The story of Skyward Sword has an unfortunate tendency to bring new characters in without foreshadowing or justification - characters that, logically, ought to have been known to the player earlier, but were not.

Demise, the game's final boss, sort of comes out of nowhere. You never see him except in the bestial, non-sapient form of The Imprisoned. You never see art depicting him as a humanoid or writings referencing him as such. This isn't completely without foreshadowing, as you do know that The Imprisoned is not in its original form, and it was once a fearsome demon king, but it's still quite abrupt to see him standing before you, wielding a sword. It was clearly intended to be a surprise, but it comes off more as a "we made the final boss fight without telling the writers" than a "clever twist ending".

Levias is an even worse fit. He's supposedly a guardian spirit for Skyloft, but he's never mentioned until the part of the game where you have to go get a MacGuffin from him. After that, he never appears in the story again. I think he gets more total screentime in Hyrule Warriors than in Skyward Sword. He feels like a Link's Awakening reference that was tossed in at the last minute, when it was decided that Skyward Sword was to be the origin myth for the Legend of Zelda series.

And the game's very status as an origin seems to contradict its internal story. Skyward Sword has an obsession with the past. You're fighting an ancient evil that was sealed away in an ancient battle by ancient peoples under the guidance of an ancient goddess. Time travel is a theme of one of the dungeons and is a major component of the story - and you always go backward to the past, never forward to the future.

The game does not feel primitive. You have plenty of advanced technology - rotorcraft and electricity are in active use on Skyloft, and the are friggen robots on the surface. That doesn't jive at all with the supposed placement at the head of the timeline. The technology of the series jumps all over the place - Skyward Sword has all this advanced, modern tech, but the next few games per the official timeline, Minish Cap, Four Swords and Ocarina of Time feature very little tech beyond that of medieval Europe. You can't even argue that all the technology we see in Skyward Sword is ancient, pre-apocalyptic tech, which will break down and be lost over the next century or so. Some of it was indigenous! Beedle had electrical generators and human-propelled aircraft, stuff we emphatically do not see in our visits to the past. He didn't salvage that from an ancient ruin, he invented it. So why isn't that seen in every other game, since they all take place after Skyward Sword?

I suspect, contrary to the claims of Aonuma, that Skyward Sword was not intended to be placed at the head of the series from the start of development. It feels like it was created either to be at a vague future point in the timeline, or with no concept of being a sequel or prequel at all. Before the three-branched timeline was made official, it was commonly argued that the series had no strict chronology, that it was literally a legend, in the sense of being the same story told over and over by different storytellers.

Under that paradigm, Skyward Sword fits well. It has the magic sword of power, it has the princess and her protector, it has the mentor, it has the companion, it has the demon king, it has the whale, it has all the stock locations. It has all the recurring nouns of the Zelda franchise, it just puts them together differently, as every game did.

With its focus on the past, I could even buy it being a distant sequel to another game, perhaps on the Wind Waker branch of the timeline. I have not yet played the games billed as direct or indirect sequels to Wind Waker, though, so that may have its own contradictions. It could even fit around the rest of the timeline - have the "past" of Skyward Sword come before every other game, and the "present" come after. There's tons of theories that could be made to fit - and all of them fit better than the actual way they chose to present it.

Overall, I just don't feel like Skyward Sword is a perfect, natural starting place for the Zelda series. I have a theory as to why it was made the Official First Zelda Story, but that will have to wait for another time.

[webart-studio]

23 of the Greatest Private Web sites to Encourage Your Personal

Some seek advice from it as a full-time job in itself. Others examine it to courting. And a number of other cats over at BuzzFeed assume it simply plain stinks.

Nevertheless it would not need to be that means.

Once you’re making use of for a job, you are usually requested to submit a resume and canopy letter, or perhaps your LinkedIn profile. However there are higher methods to face out out of your competitors, and constructing a private web site is considered one of them.

Free Templates

Skilled Bio Examples, Suggestions & Templates

Inform us a bit about your self beneath to realize entry at the moment:

Why You Want a Private Web site

This is the factor about resumes and canopy letters: Irrespective of how distinctive you attempt to make your personal, for essentially the most half, they have an inclination to learn dry. And there is a good purpose for it: It is imagined to be a single, no-frills web page that paperwork your work expertise. And whereas being concise is nice, there’s little or no alternative to convey your uniqueness, or in your character to shine by way of in any respect for that matter.

Whereas a resume is a sole, largely unchanging doc, a private web site might be personalized and up to date based on what you are engaged on, or what you wish to emphasize. It is each fluid and present.

Do you know 70% of employers say they’ve rejected a job candidate as a result of they realized one thing undesirable about them on-line? This does not imply it is best to scrub the web of every little thing about you — in truth, this statistic underscores the significance of sprucing your on-line presence. Recruiters are trying you up on-line, and a private web site that tells the story you wish to inform could make all of the distinction between you and a competing candidate.

Should you’re fascinated about creating a private web site of your very personal, try the examples beneath that hit the nail on the pinnacle. Impressed by a selected sort of web site? Click on one of many following hyperlinks to leap to that part of this text:

Greatest Private Web sites

Gary Sheng

Raf Derolez

Pascal van Gemert

Brandon Johnson

Quinton Harris

Sean Halpin

Tony D’Orio

Verena Michelitsch

Gari Cruze

Melanie Daveid

The Beast Is Again

Daniel Grindrod

The Everywhereist

Facet Hustle Nation

fifty coffees

Good Passive Earnings

Minimalist Baker

Kendra Schaefer

Mr. Cash Mustache

Albino Tonnina

Robby Leonardi

Samuel Reed

Devon Stank

Private Resume Web sites

Whether or not you create a single-page website or a bigger portfolio, the net resume serves as a extra customized choice for sharing info and demonstrating your technological expertise — and it may be utilized by all forms of job seekers.

Even if in case you have little or no work expertise, you’ll be able to leverage a web site to construct a greater image of your capabilities and your self as a candidate, whereas leaning in your conventional resume to offer the fundamental background info.

1. Gary Sheng

In contrast to an ordinary resume doc, Sheng’s web site makes it straightforward for him to incorporate logos and clickable hyperlinks that enable his software program engineering and internet growth expertise to shine.

We love that guests can select to scroll down his web page to view all the web site’s classes (“About Me,” “My Ardour,” and so on.), or leap to a selected web page utilizing the highest navigation.

The “My System” part reads like an organization mission assertion, and this private contact helps humanize his work and make him extra memorable.

2. Raf Derolez

Derolez’s internet resume is fashionable, cool, and informative. It exhibits off his character, branding, and growing expertise in a means that is nonetheless quite simple and clear. To not point out, his use of distinctive fonts and geometric overlays ascribes character to his title in an attention-grabbing means.

Wish to get in contact with Derolez? Merely click on the CTA situated on the backside of the web page to open up an e mail that is pre-addressed on to him. Or choose one of many social media hyperlinks to join with him on platforms like Twitter — the place the appear and feel of the visible belongings occurs to seamlessly align with the branding of his web site. Properly performed, Derolez.

3. Pascal van Gemert

Pascal van Gemert is an online developer from the Netherlands, and his private resume web site proves you’ll be able to embody a lot of knowledge on a single webpage if it is organized correctly.

The extra expertise you get, the extra of it you will need to share with employers. Pascal’s resume, proven above, makes use of an prolonged scroll bar to maintain guests from having to navigate to a unique web page when studying about him. He additionally visualizes his profession in numerous methods between “Profile,” “Experiences,” “Expertise,” and “Tasks,” whereas utilizing a constant teal shade to unite all of his resume contents beneath one model.

4. Brandon Johnson

Johnson’s unimaginable resume have to be seen to be believed. Stunning pictures of planets assist to enhance his planetary science background, and animations make his resume extra of an expertise than a doc.

When it comes to design, the textured, multi-layered background provides larger depth to the two-dimensional web page in a means that evokes emotions of area and the planetary methods, which Johnson’s work focuses on.

5. Quinton Harris

Harris’ resume makes use of pictures to inform his private story — and it reads form of like a cool, digital scrapbook. It covers all of the bases of a resume — after which some — by discussing his academic background, work expertise, and expertise in a extremely visible means.

To not point out, the copy is implausible. It is clear that Harris took the time to rigorously select the appropriate phrases to explain every step of his private {and professional} journey. For instance, the part on storytelling reads:

NYC, my new house, is full of the required secrets and techniques to not solely propel my craft ahead, however my id as an artist. With each lens snapped and each pixel laid, I’m changing into me.

Lastly, on the remaining navigational level (observe the scrolling circles on the left-hand facet of the web page), customers are redirected to quintonharris.com, the place he goes on to inform his story in additional element.

6. Sean Halpin

Halpin’s resume is brief, candy, and to the purpose, which is genuine to his voice and private branding outlined on the location. The white area permits his designs and duplicate to pop and command the reader’s consideration, which helps to enhance readability — particularly on cellular units:

Greatest Practices for Resume Web sites

Code your resume so it may be crawled by serps.

Supply a button to obtain your resume in PDF so the hiring supervisor can add it to your file.

Hold branding constant between the web site and doc variations: Use related fonts, colours, and pictures so that you’re straightforward to acknowledge.

Be artistic and genuine to your self. Take into consideration the colours, pictures, and media you wish to be part of your story that you simply could not embody in a doc resume.

Private Portfolios

Constructing an internet portfolio is a extremely helpful private branding and advertising and marketing instrument in case your work expertise and ability set name for content material creation. In reality, photographers, graphic designers, illustrators, writers, and content material entrepreneurs can all use internet portfolios to point out off their expertise in a extra user-friendly means than a resume or exhausting copy portfolio.

7. Tony D’Orio

It is vital to maintain the design of your visible portfolio easy to let pictures seize guests’ consideration, and D’Orio accomplishes this by that includes daring images front-and-center on his web site. His brand and navigation menu are clear and do not distract from his work. And he makes it straightforward for potential prospects to obtain his work freed from cost.

Wish to give it a attempt? Click on on the hamburger menu within the prime left nook, then choose + Create a PDF to pick as many pictures as you’d wish to obtain.

When you open the PDF, you will discover that it comes totally geared up with D’Orio’s enterprise card as the quilt … simply in case you want it.

8. Verena Michelitsch

Once you’re a designer, not one pixel in your private web site ought to go unused. Verena Michelitsch’s portfolio, proven above, is roofed finish to finish in art work. From her intensive library of labor, she selected to exhibit a number of colours, kinds, and dimensions so guests can see simply how a lot vary she has as a designer. It is an ideal instance of the traditional adage, “present, do not inform.”

9. Gari Cruze

Cruze is a copywriter. However by turning his web site right into a portfolio that includes pictures from completely different campaigns he is labored on, he makes guests wish to maintain clicking to study extra about him. Additionally, there’s a terrific CTA on the prime of the web page that leads guests to his newest weblog submit.

His website’s humorous copy — particularly within the “17 Random Issues” and “Oh Sure, They’re Speaking” sections — serves to point out off his expertise, whereas making himself extra memorable as properly. These pages additionally embody his contact info on the right-hand facet, making it straightforward to succeed in out and join at any level:

10. Melanie Daveid

Daveid’s web site is a good instance of “much less is extra.”

This developer’s portfolio options clear, well-branded imagery of campaigns and apps that Daveid labored on, and she or he exhibits off her coding expertise if you click on by way of to see the specifics of her work.

Whereas it might sound overly minimal to solely embody three examples of her work, Daveid did her portfolio a service by together with her finest, most noteworthy campaigns. On the finish of the day, it is higher to have fewer examples of excellence in your portfolio than many examples of mediocrity.

11. The Beast Is Again

Christopher Lee’s portfolio is busy and colourful in a means that works. Once you learn extra about Lee on his simply navigable website, you notice that such a enjoyable and vibrant homepage is ideal for an illustrator and toy designer.

Recognized by his model title, “The Beast Is Again,” Lee’s internet portfolio highlights eye-catching designs with recognizable manufacturers, akin to Goal and Mario, together with hyperlinks to buy his work. That is one other gallery-style portfolio with pops of shade that make it enjoyable and provides it character, thus making it extra memorable.

12. Daniel Grindrod

This freelance videographer is one other instance of a easy however modern portfolio, organizing the numerous forms of media Daniel’s finished into the classes by which his potential purchasers would possible wish to browse. The opening video spot on the homepage — labeled “Daniel Grindrod 2018,” as proven on the nonetheless picture — additionally ensures his website guests that he is actively creating stunning work.

Greatest Practices for Portfolio Web sites

Use primarily visuals. Even in the event you’re showcasing your written work, utilizing logos or different branding is extra eye-catching in your guests.

Do not be afraid to be your self. Your character, type, and humorousness might be what units you aside from different websites!

Group is vital. In case your portfolio is filled with pictures, logos, and different pictures, be sure that it is simple for guests to navigate to the place they’ll contact you.

Model your self. Select a brand or icon to make your info simply identifiable.

Private Blogs

Persistently publishing on a weblog is an effective way to draw consideration on social media and serps — and drive site visitors to your website. Running a blog is a great option to give your work a character, chronicle your experiences, and stretch your writing muscle tissue. You would possibly write a private weblog in the event you’re a author by commerce, however just about anybody can profit from including a weblog to their website and offering helpful content material for his or her viewers.

13. The Everywhereist

This weblog seems to be a bit busier, however its constant branding helps guests simply navigate the location. The journey weblog makes use of globe iconography to maneuver guests across the website, making it straightforward to discover sections past the weblog.

Owned by author Geraldine DeRuiter, this weblog additionally contains a “Greatest Of” part that enables new guests to study what the weblog covers to get acclimated. The colour scheme is heat, impartial, and freed from extra litter that would distract from the content material.

14. Facet Hustle Nation

Facet Hustle Nation is the enterprise weblog of Nick Loper, an advisor whose web site affords tons of useful monetary recommendation for particular person enterprise homeowners. His homepage, proven above, units a lighthearted but passionate tone for his readers. It suggests you will get pleasant content material all dedicated to a single objective: monetary freedom. The inexperienced name to motion, “Begin Right here,” helps first-time guests know precisely easy methods to navigate his web site.

On Nick’s weblog web page, proven above, you will discover two distinctive forms of content material: “My Podcast Manufacturing Course of,” the highest submit; and “Quarterly Progress Report,” the third submit down. The highest submit exhibits readers how Nick, himself, creates content material that helps his enterprise develop, whereas the third submit down retains his readers updated on his weblog’s progress over time. These content material sorts give folks a peek behind the scenes of your operation, displaying them you apply what you preach and that your perception is tried and true.

15. fifty coffees

The web site fifty coffees chronicles the writer’s sequence of espresso conferences in quest of her subsequent job alternative, and it does a terrific job of utilizing pictures and visuals to help within the telling of her prolonged tales.

The perfect half? Every submit ends with numbered takeaways from her conferences for ease of studying comprehension. The high-quality pictures used to enhance the tales is like icing on the cake.

16. Good Passive Earnings

That is Pat Flynn’s private weblog, a hub for monetary recommendation for individuals who wish to begin their very own enterprise. His homepage, proven above, lets you already know precisely who’s behind the content material and what his mission is for the content material he is providing readers.

His weblog web page additionally comes with a singular navigational instrument, proven above, that is not simply categorized by material. Reasonably, it is organized by what the reader desires to perform. From “Let’s Begin One thing New” to “Let’s Optimize Your Work,” this website construction helps customise the reader’s expertise so you are not forcing them to merely guess at which weblog posts are going to unravel their downside. This helps to maintain folks in your web site for longer and enhance your weblog’s site visitors in the long run.

17. Minimalist Baker

I am not highlighting Dana’s meals weblog simply because the meals seems to be scrumptious and I am hungry. Her weblog makes use of a easy white background to let her meals pictures pop, distinctive branding to make her memorable, and mini-bio to personalize her web site.

18. Kendra Schaefer

Kendra’s weblog is chock-full of details about her life, background, {and professional} expertise, however she avoids overwhelming guests through the use of a light-weight background and organizing her weblog’s modules to reduce litter. She additionally shares hyperlinks to further writing samples, which bolsters her writing authority and credibility.

19. Mr. Cash Mustache

Mr. Cash Mustache would possibly tackle an old-school, Gangs of New York-style facade, however his weblog design — and the recommendation the weblog affords — could not be extra contemporary (he additionally would not actually appear to be that).

This monetary weblog is a humorous, browsable web site that gives sound perception into cash administration for the layperson. Whereas his private tales assist assist the legitimacy of his recommendation, the navigation hyperlinks surrounding his brand make it straightforward to leap proper into his content material with none prior context round his model.

Greatest Practices for Blogs

Hold your website easy and clutter-free to keep away from further distractions past weblog posts.

Publish typically. Firm blogs that publish greater than 16 posts per months get almost 3.5X the net site visitors of blogs that printed lower than 4 posts monthly.

Experiment with completely different weblog kinds, akin to lists, interviews, graphics, and bullets.

Make use of visuals to interrupt up textual content and add context to your dialogue.

Private Demo Web sites

One other cool option to promote your self and your expertise is to create a private web site that doubles as an illustration of your coding, design, illustration, or developer expertise. These websites might be interactive and animated in a means that gives details about you and likewise exhibits hiring managers why they need to work with you. This can be a nice web site choice for technical and inventive content material creators akin to builders, animators, UX designers, web site content material managers, and illustrators.

20. Albino Tonnina

Tonnina is showcasing superior and complex internet growth expertise, however the pictures and icons he makes use of are nonetheless clear and straightforward to grasp. He additionally affords a easy choice to view his resume at the start of his website, for individuals who do not wish to scroll by way of the animation.

21. Robby Leonardi

Leonardi’s unimaginable demo web site makes use of animation and internet growth expertise to show his portfolio and resume right into a online game for website guests. The whimsical branding and distinctive means of sharing info be sure that his website is memorable to guests.

22. Samuel Reed

Reed makes use of his web page as a start-to-finish demo of easy methods to code a web site. His web site begins as a clean white web page and ends as a completely interactive website that guests can watch him code themselves. The cool issue makes this web site memorable, and it makes his expertise extraordinarily marketable.

23. Devon Stank

Stank’s demo website does a terrific job of displaying that he has the net design chops and it takes it a step additional by telling guests all about him, his company, and his passions. It is the proper steadiness of a demo and a mini-resume.

Plus, we love the video abstract. It is a consumable abstract that directly captures Stank’s character and credentials.

Greatest Practices for Demo Web sites

Model your self and use constant logos and colours to determine your title and your expertise amongst the bevy of visuals.

Do not overwhelm your guests with too many visuals directly — particularly in case your demo is animated. You should definitely maintain imagery straightforward to grasp so guests aren’t bombarded after they go to your website.

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