#but as someone that has the bare minimum knowledge of what happened during the war era

[alkaloidalypse]

SPOILERS FOR ELEMENTS EXCEPT ITS THE GENUINE REVELATION ANIMATION MV THEY UPLOADED SO MAYBE NOT BUT JUST IN CASE IM PUTTING IT UNDER KEEP READING my brain is not cooking anything however i need to lET MY THOUGHTS OUT FOR SOMEONE TO PUT IT TOGETHER LIKE A DETECTIVE

first of all i want to say that all that budget fr went to the quality of the mv like damn??? and i heard that theyre making an animation MVs series so we’ll be expecting more of such MVs like this in the future (MANIFESTING ALKALOID ANIMATION MVS PLS HAPPYELE)

ok but continuing on

i knew some of the context of past fine thanks to the anime, but i was unprepared at how clear they show tsumugi’s frown at the start. but then they have him smile for the performance and UGH the change in expression is so good but pAINFUL

this exchange piqued my interest but i didnt know what the details were exactly until i finished the whole mv and rewatched it again. 

the somewhat bittersweet/sad expression on tsumugi’s face as he looked towards eichi. then immediately followed by eichi’s look of surprise as tsumugi turns to continue singing. now my thoughts were all over the place so i actually went and search for the lyrics video of Genuine Revelation on youtube to find the english translation 

and apparently, this was the line they were singing; “The stars that can no longer shine will be annihilated”. Thankyou Nasumi Violet for their video (link sends straight to where they sing this line)

my brain is small for this i feel like this has an underlying meaning because of the contract and because this is their last performance but i feel like im reaching 

the next part that interested me was eichi’s surprised expression, and i was thinking to myself, why’s the man surprised?

his eyes were kept on tsumugi’s in confusion/curiosity(???) so whAT’s happening why is this here happy ele whAT ARE YOU COOKING

so i decided to look at the other mv and went to the part where they sing the same line. you know just out of curiosity its not like they have the same movements or anyth-

oh. no wonder eichi’s surprised

obviously im not expecting them to do the same choreography because their stage is different here, but this action of having their hands reached out like that is definitely something they planned beforehand. so for tsumugi to not reach his hand out the same time eichi does, maybe eichi does have a reason to be a bit surprised. not enough to disturb the performance, but enough to be taken aback

makes it a bit interesting, however, that their duo line lasts for four bars, and their hands reaching out like that only comes on the second bar. However, tsumugi reached out for eichi on the first bar. a whole, 4 count bar before eichi does it (that is to say, the one in the animation mv, eichi’s hand reaching out was delayed slightly compared to the game mv but its basically the same thing)

its one thing to have their choreography be like that, camera angles and everything. but its another thing if eichi tenshouin is SURPRISED mid performance and thEY MADE THAT VERY CLEAR 

i also noticed, at least for the game mv, that this was the only time tsumugi and eichi interacted onstage. the other 89% of the time, the two were apart with hiyori and nagisa between them, as if deliberately keeping them separate

so for tsumugi to not even have his hand out the same time eichi does, where its the ONLY time for them to interact onstage, on their LAST performance together makes it oh so painful 

ignoring technicalities aside, its also like tsumugi cant bear to look at eichi for long. and eichi’s surprised expresssion while he reached out to tsumugi, who’s turned away from him, its like he’s watching someone slip away from his fingers, the consequences of his actions catching up to him and he’s not even realizing it

anyway they did amazing i cant wait for eccentric party night <3333

[windupaidoneus]

hey! welcome to my long post where i complain about dragon age inquisition again 👍 literally don't even worry about it

the lack of even a bit of customisation regarding the inquisitor's origins truly is a downfall of inquisition's & generally the inquisitor kinda feels flat as a character. there are voice options but only two of them & i often find that dialogue options just don't fit what i want really, nor do they help toward making the inquisitor a character of their own. the war table operations related to the inquisitor's background could've easily been made actual quests with the sheer amount of pretty pointless quests that make the game longer & longer with very little reward for it (thinking of the sheer amount of quests just in the hinterlands. in my first playthrough i was stuck there for months because i just Did not want to get through that. it was my first dragon age game & it was very intimidating), but they're just... war table operations. & you kinda get nothing out of that. it's a real shame

the bits of custom dialogue they give to elven, qunari, dwarven & mage inquisitors are bare minimum when compared to the previous games. i enjoy that there are mage-specific choices for sit in judgement but they do kind of invariably suck (though if you're playing a shithole of a person then sure you can probably afford to make alexius tranquil). one of the few good things about these is that iirc you can get on cullen's case about him supporting you, a mage, but the inquisitor also has no real knowledge of what cullen has done & how bad it actually was so it's... yknow. kinda empty. also the way the class/race-specific dialogue is done in inquisition feels... very uh, "nonbinary character who is characterised by saying 'whoa did you just assume my pronouns???' ", which is probably not their intent (at least not fully & not everytime it happens) but it sure feels like it & god is it grating & frankly insulting at times. i'm used to fantasy microaggressions in dragon age games but in inquisition... grr.

& of course it's all coupled with quests like here lies the abyss which. just make the game not worth finishing. yes i've finished it five times but this isn't about these saves. it was a huge slap in the face to be faced with the alistair or hawke choice as a direct consequence of me doing whatever i could to help alistair keep living the happiest possible life he could have. it felt like a punishment for doing that & i know dragon age direction really likes to just make you regret doing good but this specific quest is the reason all my unfinished playthroughs are unfinished.

the flatness of the inquisitor makes it even more infuriating in that you, the player, have stakes in this but the inquisitor doesn't & cannot because they're just not allowed to have ties to either of them at all? or to have anything other than underwhelming dialogue options really lmao. you can't communicate much of anything during that quest through a character to who hawke & alistair are, yeah some important people probably, but they're still just... not people they really know. (wow haha wouldn't it be nice to have had more quests with them & also to have them as temporary companions... or something... haha..;..) at least having stroud as an easy out if you made alistair king or exiled him or whatever else spared me some anguish in my first playthrough (though i didn't know alistair at the time either so it probably wouldn't have meant anything to me).

also! as someone with ocs who have more specific backgrounds than what has been given to me by the games (like shamir, a formerly tranquil dreamer with a spirit friend - more akin to wynne than anders pre-tranquility but hope merged with him upon reaching for his mind. so basically. someone who could easily get alistair out of the fade. you know, his husband. someone who's also been friends with anders. you know. my hawke's boyfriend.) it does endlessly frustrate me that they're not willing to explore more daring options for what is & isn't possible to do. they literally have so many options to make things less miserable & they just refuse. & it's not even for the sake of narrative satisfaction! very few things in inquisition are narratively satisfying at all! so what's the point? what is the point of it all? if everything ends in misery anyway why did you make me do all this. it isn't cathartic or saddening it's upsetting & downright frustrating. i get nothing out of here lies the abyss

i don't know how to end this post. i'm just very peeved by . all this

[lumilasi]

While I wait for inspo to hit so I can finish these, I want to share some fun facts about him to the tumblr void because I can. Also boredom.

He manifested in Europe sometime before the world wars and lived through both

He is known as 'Wild' grimmhound on top of the Golden title, because of some unfortunate events disrupting the typical path his kind go through during their first ~ 10-15 years of existence.

As a Wild Hound, Alexander has the tendency to wander around the world(s) on his own a lot, and he still does this even after he married his wife. Its just what his kind do, he can't help it, it is a bit like breathing to them.

He always returns home, his wandering vs home periods tend to vary somewhat, but longest he stays home at once is 3 months at a time, and longest period away is typically 2 months. Minimums for both are two weeks.

The big exception is the current situation where he has been staying at one place for roughly 5 years to look after his son, who was kidnapped as a baby without their knowledge. They were told the baby died.

Diojas doesn't know Alexander is his actual dad, as he hasn't told him yet due to some bad things happening to Diojas caused by magical beings, making Alexander chicken out for a while....

He has some doglike mannerisms even in human form, like shaking himself dry from rain (barred from doing this with baths and showers by Mellina lol), baring his teeth when uneasy about something/ready to fight (his fam can tell the difference between the aggressive and nervous/worried version), following birds or other prey animals intently with his gaze, taking wayyy too much space in bed and sometimes being too warm too.

He gets very testy about someone damaging or trying to take his hat, as it belonged to the old man that used to take care of his dog self during his first few years of life.

He became a myth during the wars; a mystery soldier who shows up and helps you survive for a bit, before disappearing again. His appearance is signaled by sightings of a black wolf with golden stripe across its back, following you around for a while. However, if you do something the soldier finds vile, you get eaten by the wolf.

He worked together with Mellina for years as demon/monster/corrupted spirit investigator and exorcist before they actually fell in love. They first met somewhere around the late 70ies - early 80ies, and didn't get married until roughly 10 years later.

The reason there is a big gap in ages between Diojas and his sister Mia is, their son's supposed 'death' traumatized both enough they didn't dare to try for another until years later.

Alexander has a pack, made up of 7 Grimmhounds and 5 Lycans. So when people ask how his kid is doing, he tends to go 'which one? I have 14' (he's including Diojas as well)

Taking a break from cyberpunk theme to doodle stuff about another 10+ years OG character I recently upgraded, minorly. This is Alexander pre-Dadness period, he used to be a lot more asocial and serious.

He softened up slowly once he started working with his future wife on demon hunting/exorcism jobs. (It still took roughly a year for him to actually develop that kinda feelings for her)

[monstersdownthepath]

Deity: The Keeper of Masquerades

(Art by @celenewashere​!)

Lawful Evil Archfey of Clocks, Fear, and Surveillance

Domains: Darkness, Evil, Knowledge, Law Subdomains: Shadow, Fear, Espionage, Tyranny

A mire of mystery surrounds the entity known as the Keeper of Masquerades, a fog so thick that anyone attempting to learn about him can expect to be turned around and lost before they even finish following the first thread. Hundreds have sunk permanently into that mire, never to be seen again. Perhaps they found answers, but more likely than not they found nothing but their own ends. The Keeper seems very keen on keeping any and all information about himself hidden from everyone and everything. His name, if he has one, is unknown. His true form, if he has one, is unknown, the most anyone ever sees of him being the shadow-shrouded mannequin bodies he inhabits now and again. His past? He certainly has one, and it is the first verifiable fact of his existence; he was once member of Count Ranalc’s inner circle, a dutiful butler and notekeeper for the shadowy Eldest. Ever since the Count’s disappearance, the Keeper has apparently begun attending to the affairs of the land Ranalc left behind.

Despite his status as an Archfey, he has at times sat in on meetings among the Eldest--an honor that must normally be granted by one of the demigod Fey themselves, yet the Keeper does not seem to require permission--though he has no true say in their matters and holds very little sway over their actions. He is merely there to record and offer polite advice when asked, ostensibly assuring that the distant Count is kept up-to-date on all matters the Eldest still discuss and all goings-ons in the First World. He is subservient and obedient, and willingly offers his services to the Eldest, despite their role in removing Ranalc from power.

For those below the Eldest of the First World, however, the Keeper is an entity to be avoided at any cost. An enforcer of a terribly rigid and inflexible order; the second verifiable fact of his existence is that there is little he despises more than needless chaos.

The Keeper holds the unique position of bringing law to the lawless the First World, though the laws he upholds seem arbitrary to the whimsical inhabitants. He believes in ideas such as how time should always move forwards, never backwards and certainly never side-to-side, that gravity should always be aimed downwards, that point A should always lead to point B. Yes, he believes in a First World that more closely mirrors the rigidity of the Material Plane, seeing the Material as the perfect culmination of the God’s work and thus something to be imitated, rather than ignored for the sake of--eugh--freedom. 

Few things are more of an anathema for the Keeper than the concept of true freedom. The messiness and the wasted time that come from countless individuals merely lazing about in their own little worlds infuriates the shadowy being, to the point that the third verifiable fact of his existence is that there’s absolutely nothing he despises more than people wasting his time. The Keeper carries on his person a pocketwatch, a simple thing with no apparent magical power. When it is closed, he is speaking. When it is open, that is when you are allowed to speak, with him carefully measuring how much time you’re allotted. If it shuts in the middle of your sentence, you’d best end it right there, for continuing to speak after your allotted time will see the wrath of the Keeper visiting you. There is a morbid joke among fey that most are born with a reflex that quiets them upon hearing the soft, metallic click of the watch shutting, while mortal-folk have to learn the hard way.

The “Masquerades” that the Keeper keeps fourfold. The first and most publicly-known is the literal masquerade balls he holds at the borders of Ranalc’s realm, Nighthold, during which the invited disguise themselves entirely as they feast, frolic, and dance about for the amusement of the hidden host which, rumor says, dances among them. While most will make their own objectives upon being invited, the true purpose of these events is as much a mystery as the Keeper himself, with many believing them to be little more than a means for the Archfey to bring himself some levity. However, if it were simply a case of harmless fun, the invitations would not be so insistent.

“It’s a bad idea to go, but a worse one to decline” is the common saying when regarding the Keeper’s parties. Ignoring or, even worse, tossing out the invitations will see more of them appearing in more worrying and private locations, such as within the bathroom, within secret getaway rooms, within clothing, or even tucked inside the recipient‘s hand upon waking. It’s not known what happens to those who decline one too many times, though such beings are never seen again.

The second masquerade for which he is Keeper is the masquerade of safety (or privacy, as some would say) in the First World. In the stead of Count Ranalc, the Keeper oversees an army of Ankou and shadowy fey that is unrivaled in its size and spread, with rumors sometimes hyperbolizing that the Keeper has eyes all over the entirety of the infinite First World. This is not nearly the truth, but it is a lie he enjoys playing into. Whatever its true size, it gives the Keeper a significant enough reach to hold a knife to the throat of any fey that gets a bit too big for their britches, or one who starts antagonizing the rulers of the First World a bit too much.

Agents of one great Fey or another, even those of the Eldest or Archfey, may find themselves visited in the darkened hours by the servants of the Keeper to deliver polite cease and desist warnings. “Failure to heed these warnings can be costly to one’s estate,” quoth the Keeper, “And I will neither condemn nor curtail the actions of my associates in their pursuit of justice against those who threaten the balance of power.” While trickery, throne theft, and backstabbing are common pastimes of the ever-whimsical Fey hoping to stir the pot, most have learned that such acts are best done in the daylight, where the claws of the Keeper struggle to reach. At least then they get a head start.

------

Obedience and Boons

------

Not a single being has ever seen what the Keeper truly looks like (though if rumors are to be believed, many or all of the Eldest know; the Lantern King is the usual suspect). Even his most trusted Feysworn are spoken to entirely via his mannequin proxies if he deigns to meet them ‘in person’ at all, and those who’ve served him without failure or falter for their entire lives are still not allowed to set a single toe inside his shadowy lair, the Nevermoor. Barely a handful can truthfully claim to have done so much as step on the threshold of the Nevermoor, and just what secrets and treasures it may or may not contain is the third masquerade none but his chosen know the truths behind.

“Secret Police” is a polite way to describe the Feysworn who bow to the sinister mannequin. His fey minions are more comfortable in the dark, so it is his mortal minions within the First World walking among the general population during the daylight hours, enforcing his will and keeping the peace. Inquisitors are the most common breeds of adventurer to flock to the Keeper, though the investigative and attentive types of any class are welcome. Those with a knack for assuring the pecking order is disturbed as little as possible, and maniacal chaos and disruptive disorder are kept to a relative minimum. The Keeper prefers mortals who can deal with such messes both quickly and quietly. In return for their service, they earn certain freedoms both in and out of the First World, the sigil of the Keeper serving as something of both a badge of authority and a permit to excuse certain actions... though reckless abuse of this authority can earn one’s own disappearance.

The Keeper’s grip rarely expands into the Material Plane, as that is the realm of the Gods, not the Fey. Agents in the Material are typically delegated to settling matters of fey origin and little else, slapping at the hands of upstarts seeking to dig their wretched little nails into what does not belong to them. However, in a strange way it can be said that the Keeper cares for the Material, seeing it as the ultimate creation of the Gods and thus something to be preserved and protected. His grip falters, but his eyes still gaze with a curious mixture of fondness and envy. Threats to lands he has grown especially fond of are responded to with his aid, though rarely ever directly; as he is not ‘authorized’ to meddle in the Material, he does so entirely in secret, his Feysworn masquerading as members of other faiths if they display Divine magic at all.

Using the Fey Obedience feat, a worshiper of the Keeper gain s certain Boons upon reaching a certain amount of Hit Dice. These Boons are granted at 12HD, 16HD, and 20HD, though the Feysworn Prestige Class allows someone to achieve the Boons much, much sooner. The Keeper’s status as an Archfey means he grants very simple Boons; spell-like abilities that may each be cast 1/day.

Obedience: Pretend to meditate for an hour to a sound that is soft but repetitive and unrelenting, such as the ticking of a clock, dripping water, construction work, or a distant waterfall. During this time, keep one of your eyes open just a crack and listen closely, watching and listening to what everyone around you is doing. Benefit: Gain a +4 profane bonus to Sense Motive checks and saving throws against Fear effects.

Boon 1: Clairvoyance/Clairaudience

Boon 2: Symbol of Fear

Boon 3: Weird

The Keeper does not seek the power of the Eldest. He is happy with his own station and does not overreach. Overreaching is a result of greed, after all, and greed is what began the First War. His station is set, and he shall remain in it. So too shall he assure others remain in theirs.

[eupark]

HI HI HI!! if you’re reading this i’m probably at work right now and being the worst admin ever... but that’s okay... kinda. i’m admin le, but you’re more than free to also call me lizzy, my pronouns are she/her, i’m 18+, and i reside in the est. i work pretty much full time at this point, but all my free time will be spent with everyone here at eonia! don’t hesitate to IM me here, or hit me up on discord (swooping is bad#8932) if you’re having any issues at all. without further adieu, lets move on to the actual intro here. spare a like, and ill come pester you for plots.

jonas can quite literally be summed up by this, this, and this. he started as a joke of a character but now i’m too deep into his psyche to have any other original ideas.

BACKGROUND

in the year 1995, his mother was admitted into a nursing school in florence, italy. always wanting to study abroad and get away from her home city of jinju, south korea, she was ECSTATIC about it. it took some convincing her parents, but she ultimately ended up in florence for her schooling.

fast forward to spring 1997, nearing the end of her second year at school, she met apollo. he was pretty, she was pretty, you get the rest! it was a tiny fling, and she winded up pregnant with this mess of a demigod; jonas.

born a couple days before valentine’s day in 1998 to a single mother, jonas park came into the world. there were more than a few times wherein his mother considered dropping out of school and returning to korea, both during and after her pregnancy. but a born out of wed-lock child wasn’t exactly favored in the eyes of jonas’ grandparents, so she usually felt as if she wouldn’t be welcomed back with open arms, nor would her child. therefore, she stayed in italy, and in school.

apollo wasn’t around an awful lot, even in passing, but every so often he’d make sure to give her a nudge, just to make sure she was keeping on her feet. we love a bare minimum lover<3

when jonas was old enough to wonder why he didn’t have a father in his life, his mother never went into much detail about it. as far as she saw it, jonas was hers and hers alone. no god would change that. so, ultimately, jonas grew up extremely close to his mother; for awhile, they were both all the other had in their lives.

a lot of his childhood was rather uneventful, surprisingly. as absent as apollo was, and still is, he’s always managed to keep jonas relatively safe. at least, from himself.

things started getting strange when he was around eleven, after his mother got married to his stepfather. the beginnings of puberty mixing with family dynamics changing ALSO with demigod abilities manifesting and getting stronger... let’s just say it wasn’t the most healthy mix.

at first it wasn’t too bad, though; his musical aptitude could’ve easily been thought of as mere skill. he adored music deeply, and began to dream about a music career around this age. audiokinesis was a skill in him naturally, but even before he knew he was a demigod, practicing his musical skill was important to him. whether it was learning guitar or piano or anything else that piqued his interest, he was all for it.

and though he had always been able to subside his mother’s pains by mere touch for a great majority of his life, it wasn’t until he was about twelve that he really became aware of his abilities in vitakinesis. this was also when he found out about being a demigod.

imagine a boy of twelve, at home alone after school due to both his mother and step-father being at their respective jobs. now imagine said idiot boy cooking and accidentally burning his hand on the stove rather severely, and quickly trying to get into contact with his mother. before he could, both the pain and wound quickly reduced. it was mostly thanks to divine intervention of his father, but it did trigger the majority of his vitakinesis abilities. naturally, he freaked the hell out. he was pretty sure he had just burned his hand… why had the pain vanished, and why was he left with a mere dull ache? instead of telling his mother what happened, though, and asking her if he was just completely crazy (he was pretty sure, at twelve, he already was), he decided to test the ability instead.

SELF HARM TW. the incident led to him being extremely stupid and reckless, often testing his ability several times over. he burned himself on the stove, jumped from heights that shouldn’t be jumped from, even picked fights with kids at school who he knew didn’t like him just to see if he could heal himself the way he seemed to that one day after school. usually, he was able to quite well. however, since he had little control and little knowledge of how his ability worked, he wound up with a couple badly sprained wrists and twisted ankles. when he was finally satisfied (if not a little bit scared) with what he could do to alleviate his own pain, he decided to ask his mother about it. she told him about apollo readily; she knew she would have to sooner or later, but she mostly did it so she would stop catching him being such an idiot.

he started going to camp that following summer. apollo took forever to claim jonas despite it being OBVIOUS that he was his son. therefore, jonas spent a few summers vibing with the hermes kids and the other unclaimed kids in the same cabin.  jonas was only claimed at fourteen because apollo pretty much had to do so.

camp was usually pretty uneventful, too. i mean, all things considered. his dad didn’t really talk to him much, he wasn’t on the brink of any wars, it was just... camp. a couple heartbreaks here and there, a burn scar that’s never quite healed, and a few encounters with monsters outside of camp walls because he was bored... but really? nothing TOO SPECIAL ever happened.

nearing the end of high school, jonas was ready to be done with schooling forever, as he was never big on getting favorable grades, nor did he want a career that required it. as far as he knew, he would figure things out.

WELL that didn’t happen. to turn a long story short his never going back to school plan turned into a gap year from school after a near death experience trying to be a normal person outside of a protective barrier<3

to make an even longer story shorter because this intro is extremely long he’s now in his second year at eonia, majoring in video game development after a miserable semester and a half as a music major.

PERSONALITY

copy and pasted from his app but you know!

jonas is generally fun-loving, with a go with the flow type of attitude matched with a firm dislike of critical thinking that may lead one to believe he’s never had a worry go through his pretty little mind. an assumption far from the truth, but he’d never give the inclination of otherwise. his mind constantly rustles with worries about the vagueness of the “future,” and he lives in fear that he’s never quite doing enough to keep up, especially for someone of his age. in a way, jonas is stuck in a never-ending cycle of his own inertia. most of these existential fears, however, live beneath the surface, and are rarely spoken to another soul.

to the world outside of his head, he is extroverted, with a mouth that runs faster than his legs ever could. jonas is loyal and optimistic, both nearly to a fault and never for his own favor. since he runs on limited brain capacity and an annoying desire to be liked by every individual he meets, his buoyancy can become quite tiresome to many rather quickly. a passion for music hums through his veins, and many dreams reside in his heart, but life has always told him that no matter how hard he tried, he’d always come in second place. instead of overcompensating, it’s instead a complete rarity for jonas to put one hundred percent of his soul into anything; that is to say, it is rare for jonas to try his absolute hardest. to him, second place has its silver linings, and sometimes some shade. well, at least he’s an enthusiastic runner-up.

[meditationsfromthethirdrail]

Credentials and Credibility

I’ve written about polarization and about empathy, rights and responsibilities in the last couple of blog posts.  I have a long list of interrelated topics to cover before the November elections and I plan to keep plowing through them.  But I’m well aware that my voice is a candle in the wind, to borrow the phrase used by T.H. White in the title of his tale about King Arthur’s dream of a more egalitarian and peaceful society.  The number of readers of my blog thus far may barely run into double digits and that may never change.  We are all drowning in information (and misinformation) unless we are either so socioeconomically disadvantaged as to be denied access or are actively disengaged from media.  People in either category aren’t reading this.

With all the competition for the attention of readers and listeners, if someone wants to be heard above the din, he or she either has to have a forceful personality and a good platform, or actually have something important to say.  I may not have either of those.  Readers will judge for themselves.  But it occurred to me that I ought to at least provide a little background about myself, which may or may not compel you to hear me.  So here it is.

My story is not one of hard knocks and resentment - it’s a success story.  There are a lot of ways to define success but I feel like I’ve grabbed a nice assortment of brass rings during my almost-seven decades on the planet.  I’ve had a long and happy marriage to an incredible woman; I’ve traveled extensively (six continents and all fifty states) and lived for substantial periods in many states; I have three degrees from a major college; I attained a modestly high position in a large, global professional services firm and was financially well rewarded for my efforts; and I have many hobbies and interests that make it easy for me to stay fully occupied in retirement.  Most importantly, I’m happy and at peace with myself and others.  One could argue that these successes may have caused me to be out of touch with those who’ve enjoyed fewer of them, but I don’t think that’s entirely true, and I’ll try to suggest why.

My parents were the son and daughter of a sharecropper and a truck farmer/itinerant salesman, respectively, in rural Mississippi.  They grew up during the Great Depression. They were married and gave life to my older brother when they were still in their teens.  My dad dropped out of high school to sign up for the Army and served in the European theater in WWII.  After the war he got a G.E.D. and served as a tractor mechanic for a while.  Around the time I was born he was hired by a prominent agricultural implement manufacturing company, which led to him being transferred from Mississippi to Maryland to Ohio to Idaho to Oregon and to Iowa in order to earn promotions, and with family in tow.  Later he also transferred to Texas, Missouri and Georgia, after I was left behind to attend college in Iowa.  In those days it was possible to rise pretty high in the ranks of a business like my dad’s, without a glittery collegiate resume, if you worked hard and were willing to uproot yourself and your family whenever it was called for.  So my dad eventually did rise fairly high in the ranks, and in the meantime my mom scrambled her way to a B.A., then taught high school English for a short time.

All’s well that ends well, as Shakespeare once said.  My parents came a long way from the dusty fields where they picked cotton for 50 cents a day.  My own road to success was much easier than theirs.  During most of my childhood our family was financially situated about in the dead center of what was then considered middle class.  My parents were not rich, although they accumulated modest wealth later in life, and they were always frugal, so I grew up with very few toys and a mostly empty closet.  My parents were not the type to devote much time attending to my personal pursuits, other than to quietly demand that I get good grades in school.  So I wouldn’t say I was born with a silver spoon in my mouth, but I understand that’s a relative thing.  I certainly wasn't lavished with material things as a child, but I never went hungry or worried about having a roof over my head.

Aside from a base level of financial and emotional support and protection, the best thing my parents gave me was a solid education in a robust public school system.  This was a pre Betty Devos era.  Fortunately I had just enough innate ambition (or willingness to succumb to my parents’ expectations) and intelligence to perform in the upper tier, academically.  I could have done better but I often didn’t “apply myself,” as they say.  In retrospect I realize I had ADHD but few people understood or cared about that back then.

My college record was spotty at first, but ultimately pretty good.  I had almost no grasp of what I wanted to do with my life.   As a result, I had an abnormally extended adolescence, to roughly age 27.  Maybe I was a trendsetter; I see a lot more of that happening with young people today.  In any case I considered, at various times and among other things, becoming a Baptist minister (I was licensed and briefly attended seminary), an English professor (I have an M.A. in English and instructed freshman writing courses for three years), a novelist and poet (insufficient talent and discipline derailed that plan), and a hotel manager (nah).   A happy accident of my wandering and indecision was that I acquired a lot of knowledge that later paid off in surprising ways I’ll come back to later.  I was financially very poor the entire time, which gave me considerable perspective on what it means to be concerned about affording basics such as food and transportation.

I vividly remember the catalysts for my decision to enter the social mainstream. One was the fallout from a poker game I got into with some friends.  One of my “friends” was a notoriously unethical character who, one late evening when I was especially unlucky and perhaps too full of beer, lured me into some bad bets that resulted in a $700 debt to him.  At that time, when I was working several crummy part-time jobs to afford food and my $50 share of the rent on a slum-quality house we shared with two other guys, $700 dollars seemed like a million dollars.  I didn't realize and no one told me that on the very next evening the same group of friends gathered for another poker game as I was licking my wounds and trying to form a plan.  I was not present to witness the scene in which the guy whom I was newly indebted to suffered an equally humiliating loss - a loss that was forgiven by the victor on the condition that the loser would also forgive my loss.  My friends assumed that Bart (not his real name, or is it?) would inform me that I was off the hook.  He did not.

For the first time in my life, I devised a budget in order to determine how I could repay Bart the debt that didn’t actually exist, because that’s the kind of guy I am.  I believed, and I still do, that a person is morally and ethically responsible for meeting whatever commitments he or she enters into.  So  I scrambled for more hours working as a church janitor, a tutor and a library assistant; I ate Kraft macaroni and cheese almost every day (30 cents a box, if I recall); I stayed in my room as if I had contracted the then-undreamt-of coronavirus; and I turned over every penny that didn’t go for rent and minimal food to Bart in three monthly installments until I was finally clear.  I was six feet tall but my weight fell to about 140 pounds.  On the day I forked over the last $200, Bart skipped town, just as the news finally arrived that I wasn’t supposed to have owed that debt.

That sordid chapter concluded with me taking a job, out of sheer desperation, in a factory where I was paid a below-minimum wage to operate a machine which applied mailing labels to printed advertisements.  It was mind-numbing.  There were perhaps another 100 workers in that factory doing the same thing I was doing.  The output of each worker was measured daily by the factory management.  By the end of the first week I was the most productive mailing label attacher in the factory.  To keep myself from going insane, I approached my task as if it were a game and challenged myself each shift to beat my previous day’s output, which I always did.  During my brief lunch breaks I used to surreptitiously glance around at the other workers and I understood exactly what Thoreau meant when he opined that the mass of men live lives of quiet desperation.  I don’t know if he was right about “the mass of men,” but he certainly could have been describing that crew at the factory.

In my second week at the factory I met another newly-hired college guy whose wife and he were trying to save enough money to move to Los Angeles so he could take a shot at professional acting - this was his second job.  Chatting with him during lunch breaks, i was inspired by his desire to fulfill a dream and the difficult steps he was taking to do it.  I listened to him, I looked around at the hollow-eyed, middle-aged folks who had worked for years operating labeling machines, and I squirmed as I considered what a sap I was for racking up a poker debt and falling victim to a con man.  i abruptly abandoned the factory but I felt so discombobulated that I enlisted my good buddy John to drive out to Idaho with me so I could visit my brother and try to get my shit together.  By the end of that brief sojourn out west, the best job offer I could manage was from Roto-Rooter . . . to work in the field, as it were.  Wake up call!

If you’ve read this far you must be wondering how any of this supports the notion that I’m qualified to write about sociopolitical matters.  It doesn’t, except to demonstrate that I have at least a small measure of “street cred.”  But the best is yet to come.  When I returned to Iowa I found a better job in a hotel.   Initially I was a night auditor, which is a position that involves being a desk clerk part of the time and an accountant the rest of the time.  Only a small step forward, financially, but it gave me a taste for something I had never previously thought about doing for even one minute.  Accounting, I quickly learned, was something I had a natural aptitude for, and in some quirky way I found it interesting.  Once again I viewed my duties as a sort of game, but this was a game that lit up my brain much more brightly than did operating a machine to perform an exceptionally repetitive task.  

My whole life is a series of lucky breaks at critical junctures.  In this instance the break was that I met a co-worker - a guy who shared the hotel night auditor position with me - who had previously worked for a large CPA firm.  He had taken the part-time hotel job because he was trying to become a full-time stock trader and that’s what he was doing during the day.  From him I learned what it is that CPAs in a big firm actually do.  Let me assure you I’m not going to get into that subject, in case you were already feeling the dread.  (Thank God for actuaries - the only people who make accountants seem slightly interesting.)  Suffice it to say that I figured out how I could minimize the additional schooling I would need to become qualified to be a CPA and I decided to take a stab at it.

I kept the hotel job but started carrying a heavy load of college classes - accounting, math, economics, law, etc.  It so happened that I met my future wife, who was just finishing her Interior Design degree at the same college, about the same time I took the first tentative steps down my new career path.  That was even more fortuitous - I give her lots of credit for helping me stay the course.  The two years in which I went to college in the day, worked at the hotel at night, and struggled to get our new romance off the ground, was “character-building,” to say the least.  I can barely remember anything about that period, it was such a blur.  To give you an idea of how much of a blur it was, the major highlight I remember was driving with my new spouse to Des Moines to dine at Spaghetti Works.  $5 for beer-and-cheese spaghetti, all-you-can-eat salad bar and a glass of swill.  Heaven!

When the two hellish years finally ended and I received my B.S. in Accounting, I had already lined up a job in Des Moines as an auditor with one of the Big 8 (at that time) accounting firms.  Not long afterward, I passed the CPA exam and my wife landed a spot with a local design firm, and we were on our way.

Ok, at last I’m where I possibly should have started. In the ensuring three decades I continued to work as a CPA, becoming a partner along the way (meaning that I became one of the owners), and developing a specialization working with clients in the financial services industry - investment management companies and banking and finance companies, primarily.  This is the good part, folks.  My career soon took me from Iowa to New York City, where my background in English earned me the privilege of being a key designer and the principal author of new practice guidance for our international firm, which was just merging with another large international firm.  That put me in the spotlight for a time and gave me a leg up for promotion.  After the merger we relocated to Los Angeles, where I worked with some of the most prominent investment management companies in the world, and numerous banks, mortgage banks and other financial institutions.  Finally we moved to southeast Pennsylvania and I split time engaged with clients there and in California, and with our national financial services practice in New York.

Late, late nights on Wall Street helping to prepare financial offerings with hundreds of millions of dollars on the line.  Late, late nights at client offices in L.A., San Francisco, Portland, Seattle, New York and Philadelphia, managing teams of young accountants to deal with complex accounting problems under tremendous pressure.  Board meetings, fee negotiations, staff meltdowns, discoveries of fraud and malfeasance, financial crises in which I was an inside observer.  A 60-hour work week felt almost like a vacation compared to many weeks with even longer hours.  It was enough to give me PTSD.  I don’t want to overstate it - it wasn’t like actual life or death combat PTSD - but I still have nightmares ten years and more after the fact.

That’s a very quick summary of the 30+ years in which I obtained hard-won knowledge about global finance and economics - a period in which I also had a lot of experiences with politics, charitable organizations and other components of society I didn’t have time to get into today.  I still spend a lot of time staying informed about subjects ranging from psychology and mythology to current events and hard science.  There’s a ton I still don’t know.  But as my all-time favorite singer Joni Mitchell famously said, I’ve looked at clouds from both sides now.

[darkpoisonouslove]

Valtor and Griffin parents headcanon. I love your works. The way you write is sublime😍

Oh, wow, thank you so much for the kind words and this sweet request!

Let's set this in an AU in which Valtor ran away from the Ancestral Witches with Griffin and the two are left to live in peace after they helped end the war. Now my personal headcanon is that Darcy is their daughter so I'll go with that but most of these can probably be applied in general as well:

- Valtor is worried when Griffin doesn't feel well and when he uses his magic to check up on her, he finds out she's pregnant. Griffin suspected as much but didn't really want to entertain the possibility before she could be more certain what's happening to her because she didn't want to disappoint them both.

- What is more, Griffin is worried about what kind of parent she'll be. Her mom was a very warm person and even despite that, the way the world treated her brought out the worst in her and she turned more and more to darkness, evil and mayhem until she joined the Ancestral Coven and almost helped destroy the universe. She's scared she'll make a terrible mother and that was a part of the reason why she didn't really want to confirm that she was pregnant.

- Valtor has his own doubts about being a parent. His own upbringing was a total disaster and there was nothing healthy about it. He didn't know what love is before Griffin and he has a lot of demons to battle and a lot of ingrained habits that he needs to shake off. He has to be more open and in touch with his emotions and not push upon his child any unhealthy ideas that were forced on him. He and Griffin have a conversation in which they promise each other that they'll be there for one another and keep each other in check.

- Despite having a ton of doubts about himself, Valtor is very enthusiastic about being a father and helps Griffin with everything he can during the pregnancy and after she gives birth. He's changing diapers and dressing the baby (Griffin and he agreed to use as little magic when it comes to caring about the baby as possible because they want Darcy to feel that they're there for her). He even gets up in the middle of the night instead of Griffin to let her rest when he can get the job done although Griffin is the early bird and he is usually the one who has a hard time waking up in the morning. But he’s happy to be there for both of his girls.

- Darcy has her room decorated with Dragons Lights - little sparks of dragon fire that are enchanted to light up when she’s awake so that she’s never left scared in the dark and the room always looks warm and comforting to her. The Dragon Lights stay even after she’s outgrown her fear of the dark because without them it won’t feel like home.

- Darcy displays strong magical abilities from an early age and Griffin and Valtor make it a point to include magic in their activities to help her control her powers. That also hides its risks though. Griffin and Valtor are forced to put an inhibiting spell on Darcy that keeps her from teleporting so that she doesn’t end up in the middle of a busy street or squashed in a machine. They do manage to teach her responsibility and safety when using magic in time, though, and soon she’s not teleporting away from them but uses her powers to help around the household.

- Shapeshifting is mastered from early in her childhood for it was successfully incorporated in games of tag. They start with an animal of Darcy’s choice and every time someone else becomes it, they all shift into another animal. It helps her get used to the feeling of shifting, learn to stay in control, master many different forms, and improve her speed and duration of the shapeshifting process. It’s also a lot of fun running around in a wolf or bunny form or flying as a raven or an owl.

- Hide-and-seek becomes much more intense and challenging when everyone has the power of illusions. Darcy’s illusions can’t compare to those of her parents at first and they dampen their magic to allow her to participate on an equal level and find them after all. But she soon develops her powers and it is her who needs to hit the brakes on her magic for her parents to be able to catch up. She becomes so good at illusions that it’s a good thing that they taught her to be responsible with her magic and not use it for whatnot or to hurt others and make her parents’ job harder.

- For one of Griffin’s birthdays Darcy makes an illusion that has all the known stars that have existed incorporated in it for her mom to be able to enjoy them all because she knows how much Griffin loves astronomy and the cosmos. She spent months memorizing star maps in order to be able to create the illusion and both Griffin and Valtor are left speechless by the complexity of it.

- Darcy and Valtor train with the Dragon Fire powers which she inherited from him. Griffin is a bit worried that they might hurt each other since Darcy is inexperienced and Valtor’s ego sometimes makes him forget he needs to hold back (he’s hurt her a few times when they used to spar or argue in the past) but Darcy surprises with precise control from early on and Valtor shows amazing restraint (so much so that she can see his muscles tensing with memories of him being hurt by his mothers while he’s trying to never subject his daughter to the same). Darcy becomes super good with using her Dragon Fire powers to the point where Valtor doesn’t have anything to teach her anymore and any further knowledge she needs to acquire herself.

- Darcy knows about her father’s demon form but hasn’t seen it. She wonders if she has one since she shares his DNA but Valtor assures her she doesn’t which might have been more of a disappointment in the edgy phase of her teen years but seeing how closed off he is about it convinces her that it is not something to wish for. She asks him to show it to her, though, because she wants to know all parts of her father and that includes his demon form. After a long discussion with both of her parents, Valtor finally agrees. Darcy is a bit shocked by the difference that is in him but she says she loves him nonetheless because even when he appears to be a demon, he isn’t one in his heart. He will always be the caring and present father that raised her and helped her become who she is. The one thing she does like from the demon form are the big demon wings, though.

- Darcy had a fascination with wings from an early age and would study all insects with wings she could get her hands on. Unfortunately, she was literally getting her hands on them and not all that carefully, too, so that resulted in a lot of torn off wings and dead insects in her hands which always made her cry. It did provide a good opportunity for Griffin to teach her a lot of healing spells that can be applied even to insects if you have enough control of your magic to use it on such small scale. Darcy was determined to not cause more destruction and death to the creatures that fascinated her so she learned to exercise enough control over her magic to be able to fix the smallest of injuries in the tiniest of species. That allowed her to study them without killing them.

- She also loved to study birds (especially in flight) but they were harder to come by and catch for detailed explorations (but at least that kept her from killing any of them). When she grew up a bit and learned to fly and control her magic, she befriended a crow that would always come near her and flap its wings around as if inviting her to join it in flight. She did once and the two flew around the sky like old friends with the crow even showing her some bird maneuvers that Darcy could copy when she shapeshifted into a crow herself. That later became a regular occurrence.

- The wing fascination might have started from Faragonda’s fairy wings on one of her numerous visits. She was pretty much Darcy’s fairy godmother (even if Valtor did not allow for that to become an official term) and Darcy loved to grab at her sparkly wings while she was a baby and Faragonda held her. Luckily for the fairy, her wings were much stronger than those of the insects so Darcy couldn’t rip them off or damage them. They always drew the girl’s attention, though, and she made herself “witchy wings” with her powers of illusion when she was nine or ten. They were dark purple and shimmered like starts on the night sky. Later, when she became older, she switched to flying around with dragon wings sprouting from her back. They were just an illusion, of course, but she was proud to be the bearer of the Dark Dragon Fire and her father’s daughter.

- Darcy loved all the animals and constantly dragged some stray kitten or dog home. Sometimes a squirrel, a hedgehog on occurrence, once even a snake. Neither one of her parents were very happy about it. Especially when one of the cats got three times the size of a regular cat and destroyed half of the furniture. None of them tried to inhibit Darcy’s connection with nature, though. It was a thing to be expected since she had Dragon Fire burning inside her and it was the substance of all life so all life was drawn to her (and Darcy might have helped her father reconnect a bit with nature himself since he was never allowed to explore that part of his powers and who he is). The establishment of some ground rules was necessary, though, to keep any and all incidents with wild animals to a bare minimum.

- Griffin would bake cookies or other sweets quite often when Darcy was little but she only used natural sweeteners to make sure her dabbling in the kitchen wouldn’t have negative effects on Darcy’s health. Cooking soon turned into a family exercise since Darcy was curious to learn how to make her own cookies and Valtor didn’t mind spending more time with his wife and daughter no matter what activity occupied them during that time. Griffin deemed it a great opportunity to teach them both some cooking skills so that they wouldn’t have to starve to death without her.

- Griffin and Valtor used to read and tell Darcy legends about the magical dimension and fill in some gaps with their own personal stories when they were in pursuit of some of the most powerful artifacts. That taught Darcy a great love for words and adventures and she spent quite a lot of time with her nose in a book when she learned to read.

- That happened at an early age and later on she built on that knowledge by studying magical languages that would allow her greater resources for spells. She knew a lot of languages (some of which didn’t even exist anymore) before she even turned fifteen. And all of that of her own volition. Neither Griffin, nor Valtor forced her to do anything.

- When she became a teenager, Darcy inevitably started using some teen slang that Griffin just shook her head at while Valtor was the one to find it rather distasteful and express his dislike of it. Darcy told him he was being old-fashioned which resulted in Valtor starting to use slang as well, much to Darcy and Griffin’s annoyance. They had to beg him to stop and become the old old-fashioned Valtor again.

- Darcy has a very open relationship with both of her parents that includes a lot of communication and trust. She knows she can tell them everything without being judged. Her parents are flawed people as well and know what it is to make mistakes which is something Darcy takes comfort in because she knows they're not perfect and they understand that she isn't either. She knows they will listen to her and try to help her avoid making mistakes she will regret later just as she knows that they will let her make her own decisions and allow her to find herself and be her own person.

I have to go to a lecture so I’ll have to leave it off here. Besides, I wrote down all I can think of right now. Hope this makes you smile. I sure had a lot of fun with these.

[sherry-smith]

Trapped Among Mortal Things

Lack of knowledge leads to questions. Questions lead to answers. Answers lead to knowledge. Knowledge leads to trouble. Seems easy, doesn’t it? Seems logical.

It wasn’t always like this, not until Earth was created. In the beginning, the true Beginning, trouble didn’t exist. That’s due to the fact that knowledge didn’t exist either, at least not what people currently label as knowledge. Crowley, of course, remembers what it was like; They create you, They fill you with the bare minimum you’re required to know - your name, your identity, your purpose - and then you’re free to go. There was no such thing as lack of knowledge because no one was aware that maybe, just maybe, they didn’t have the keys to unlock all the secrets of the universe; no one was even aware that there were secrets of the universe in the first place. This means, obviously, that questions didn’t exist either and, by extension, nor did answers.

It is believed that questions were invented by Lucifer when he asked why angels should submit to human beings. That’s not quite true. What he really did was use free will to point out that there was no reason for humans to be put on a pedestal and venerated as the Almighty’s finest creations. The War in Heaven begun and ended, and questions still didn’t exist; without them, free will seemed rather pointless.

Actually, questions were invented by a pretty stubborn and curiously clueless Archangel. At first all he did was knock at the Lord’s door - despite everyone telling him it was a hopeless mission, that They weren’t there anymore - and requested, in utter reference, for permission to descend in Hell. It was an odd request, admittedly. He claimed that he couldn’t bear the thought of those poor souls suffering from the wounds inflicted to them during the War; no matter the horrors they had committed, no matter how awful their sins, they still were creatures of the Lord and, as such, deserved some kind of comfort. Of course, the permission wasn’t granted - nor denied, which seemed good enough for the Archangel.

So he crossed Hell’s entrance. His sincerity and good will meant nothing to the fallen angels, least of all to Lucifer, still too full of pride to admit his defeat, or even accept help of any kind. Raphael was thrown out without hesitation. It took him a while to realise the price that little visit had costed him; his innocence was forever lost, and, as a memento, his wings turned as black as the darkest night.

Being stubborn, the Archangel - not quite Fallen, nor quite full of Grace - knocked again at the Lord’s door, furiously, desperately. «Why? - he cried out - Why would You invent pain and suffering? Why would You cast them out instead of proving them the Holiness of Your Love?» He didn’t know it yet, but in that moment he invented questions, and all their dreadful consequences.

He also didn’t know that They were still there, contrary to the popular belief. The door slammed open, shockingly. Raphael felt a tingly warmth in the middle of his chest as a hand pushed him, and then there was coldness, as he fell for miles and miles. He had understood the theory behind pain, but feeling it? Feeling pain is a whole other matter than understanding it.

He landed in a pool of boiling sulphur, horribly disfigured and deeply broken. Raphael was no more, and the Almighty disappeared for good. It truly was the end of the War in Heaven.

Lack of knowledge leads to questions. Questions lead to answers. Answers lead to knowledge. Knowledge leads to trouble. Easy as that.

Crowley never regretted inventing questions, not once. He’s always thought it was quite a clever move of his. The real problem was that nobody had bothered inventing answers yet, so at first one couldn’t see the brilliance of being able to ask questions; they seemed rather pointless.

Despite not existing yet, Crawly had a vague idea of what an answer should look like; it has to make sense and be satisfying, even when you don’t like it, no, especially when you don’t like it. But he couldn’t invent answers himself, having invented questions already, so all he could do was wait for someone to do the job.

Crawly was quite sure that knowledge was somehow linked to answers. At that time, knowledge did exist - as established previously - but it wasn’t part of this particular equation yet. The chain was more like: free will leads to questions, questions lead to trouble. Crawly was aware of the missing link, having thought about the issue for a long time. He was therefore delighted upon discovering that there was a tree in the middle of the Garden of Eden that could grant mortals knowledge. He was even more so upon discovering that Lucifer - no, not Lucifer, not anymore, Satan now - was looking for somebody to go up there and make some trouble. Obviously, he volunteered.

He didn’t really need to make trouble; he just had to lead the humans to ask questions, that was all. He crawled to Eve, mostly because she seemed more interesting than Adam. She also seemed to have a better understanding of her own free will.

«You see that tree? It’s called the Tree of Life and its fruits grant you the ability to tell the difference between good and evil. Such a pity God forbid you to eat them.»

«Why?»

Technically, you can’t see a snake smiling, but in that particular case one could feel the serpent’s cheeky grin. «Indeed. Why?»

He slithered away, hiding himself between the bushes to watch the Fall of Man from a safe spot. If he was lucky, soon enough humans would’ve invented answers. But that’s not what happened.

It is believed that answers were invented by the Almighty in response to a stubborn Archangel’s question, when he explained to him that, hadn’t They invented pain, there would have been no balance in the universe, things could’ve never worked in the long run; it was ineffable. That’s not quite true. They tend to ignore questions, so it wouldn’t have made any sense for Them to come up with answers.

Actually, answers were invented by a pretty clueless and curiously atypical angel. He was supposed to smite demons on sight and yet, once Crawly started talking to him, he was too polite to even ignore him. Yes, as soon as he heard the snake’s doubts, he had started babbling about the ineffability of the Great Plan, which was such a tedious subject; but at least he wasn’t rude, nor entitled. And then…

«Didn’t you have a flaming sword?»

«Er.»

«You did, didn’t you? It flamed like anything. It looked very impressive, I thought.»

«Er, well…»

«Lost it, have you?»

«Oh no! Not exactly lost, more…»

«Well?»

«If you must know, I gave it away.»

Two things crossed Crawly’s mind. First of all, this was no common angel. What kind of angel gives away his God-given weapon to mortals who, on top of it, had just been punished? It was a miracle he hadn’t fallen. But, to be fair, those days God was nowhere to be found; probably They weren’t paying too much attention.

Second, he had answered his question. “Have you lost your flaming sword?” “No, I gave it away.” Simple as that. He hadn’t batted an eye, as if answers had always existed. In the end, there was no need to wait for humanity to sort it out.

He couldn’t help but smile. Things were about to get really interesting. And this angel, this Aziraphale, seemed really worth to be liking.

Lack of knowledge leads to questions. Questions lead to answers. Answers lead to knowledge. Knowledge leads to trouble. But it’s not so easy.

It’s not so easy, because sometimes lack of knowledge leads to blissful ignorance, which may lead to either happiness or violence; sometimes knowledge leads to satisfaction or peace; sometimes questions lead to more questions, or answers lead to even more questions, in a vicious circle that can’t be broken because sometimes, sometimes, there are no answers, no matter what.

Crowley shouldn’t keep asking questions - one thinks he should know better. And yet… And yet he still does. He never stopped. His curiosity, his need for answers, turns always out to be stronger than any fear of consequences, however big or frightening they might be.

But they’re drowning everybody else?

What did he say that made everybody so upset?

What the deuce are you doing locked up in the Bastille?

Should I say thank you?

He likes asking questions to Aziraphale. He knows that, no matter what, he’ll always get an answer back. It’s comforting. It almost makes him forget how bad questions can be, it makes him feel like it’s not wrong to pursuit knowledge, like he himself - his own strange existence - is not wrong for being curious.

However, thing is, sometimes Aziraphale is not enough. He doesn’t understand the Ineffable Plan no more than Crowley does, and that’s frustrating. So, he plays with fire; he talks to the Almighty Themselves. He’s aware of the dangers but he’s not afraid. After all, what’s the worst that could happen to him? He’s already fallen.

God, You listenin’?

He’s not sure why he still bothers. There’s nobody up there, there hasn’t been for such a long time that one might even question the existence of a Creator in the first place. And Crowley probably will, one day, given his nature. But not quite yet. For now, he just looks at the starry sky and wonders where in the damn universe are They hiding.

For now, he just looks at the starry sky. He thinks about how long it would take to travel to the end of the universe, how long would it take to search it all, every planet, every nebula, every galaxy. He decides an eternity is not enough.

(He think about mountains and brave little birds and spaceships travelling at the speed of light)

What he does know for certain is that the universe itself won’t last that long. Protostars become red giants, which become white dwarfs; supergiants become nebulae or supernovae, neutron stars and black holes. He knows, for he had built them, a very long time ago; he created those intricate patterns, those complex chemical reactions that lead one way or another depending on as little as a the presence or absence of a single atom, those delicate physical laws that maintain everything in balance, a graceful dance across the light-years. There’s so much beauty out there, but it won’t last; the universe runs towards entropy and there’s no stopping it. Even if there’s no Apocalypse to destroy the Earth, life is ultimately doomed in such a cold and hostile environment. What’s the point of it if… there’s no point at all?

Hey, God, can You show me the Ineffable Plan? Not all of it, You can just spoil me the ending, will You?

Crowley feels lost, without references, without meaning. He tries not to think about it. He tries to keep himself busy - some little temptations, lunch at the Ritz, a bottle of wine - but ultimately he feels like a tightrope walker, torn between cheap materialism, existential dread and hopeless cynicism.

And so he asks, question after question. And so he longs for all the things he’s lost and all the things he’ll never reach.

Trapped among mortal things (even the starry sky will end) why do I yearn for God?

[rp-dreamland]

Light, Darkness, and what Lies in the Middle. (Kingdom Hearts)

As I often start any post dealing with the series, :  “Good Tidings, Friends' 

-Xemnas, 358/2 Days. In, Where Nothing Gathers.  

Sorry, its just a quote that sticks out, for no real meaningful reason for me. Perhaps my love of 358/2 Days, but I digress. Thanks for reading this!  This post, is all about Disney and Square’s love child, of Kingdom Hearts. A series, I am not sure, would ever happen again. I love it all the same. 

With the Autumn Season slowly rolling in, I am in search of a more, Long-term partner to write with. Ideally, someone who loves the series, as I do. 

When it comes to knowledge of the series, I have played every game, including some of Union Cross; that said, I do not keep up with playing U.C, but watch videos on Youtube, when needed to be brought up to speed there. Mobile gaming like that, was never my thing. I enjoy a console, of sorts, rather than my phone or tablet being used. But that’s just me. Some of my close friends love the game, and playing on their phone- so I don’t judge on that regard. 

As mentioned above, my favorite game in the series might be, 358/2 days. Kingdom Hearts II, might be a close runner up, but the Sea-Salt Trio is my favorite trio, leading towards the bias. Though, the first game also has a special place in my heart too….hmmm. 

Favorite character..? Also, a hard question. I love them all so much, but for this post, I will mention my love of Luxord. Something about the gambler always caught my eye- even in his small role in KHII. 

Enough about myself, let’s move onto, possible plot/story ideas.  ____________________________________________________________

Everything mentioned here, is only thoughts/ideas, suggestions even. So, if there is something here, that sparks any idea of your own, feel free to mention or change anything! Open to any general thoughts you may have as well! 

Re-writing/Changing events.  While this plenty in the series, I love, I can not lie when there are some things I’d change. We can look at it, as AU type, or even, ‘What-If’. One concept someone has suggested to me before, was changing who was place as head, of Castle Oblivion, during the events of Chain of Memories. Rather than Marluxia, let it be Luxord- due to his own motif fitting the card motif better. In return, having Marluxia playing a bigger role in the events to follow, can change up how KHII starts. Marluxia could still have his hopes to over-throw Xemnas and the Organization.  Another suggestion to throw out, is Kingdom Hearts III. Personally speaking, I rather enjoyed the game, but I see on Youtube quite often, 'My Rewrite of KHIII’, so why not try one of our own? Might take a bit more to discuss what changes and ideas we want in. But, could be fun! 

Playing in the in-between periods:  As it suggests, writing in events/times not fully explored in the game. Riku’s perspective during Days, Xehanort under Ansem the Wise’s teachings. Kairi’s life on the Islands, after the first game. Xehanort, Yen-Sid, and Erauqs’s time, as students learning the way of the Key-blade. 

Cross-overs/Universe Changing:  Basically, mixing something else with Kingdom Hearts, or Kingdom Hearts into something else.  One idea I have had, is a Cross-over with Persona 5. Both deal with Hearts…right?  Or, the KH characters, say in the World of Pokemon, Being Trainers and on a completely different Adventure! 

AU Settings:  I have seen images/Fan-art of the KH characters, in school uniforms. A school AU, could be a more lighthearted approach. Something, like a Slice of Life Anime. Struggle could be the School’s main sport. 

Playing with the Canon Characters, in Canon Events:  Kinda going in a way, the Manga does so. Adding more life, and such in the events. 

Our own Characters, in the Union Cross Universe:  (I will mark, this is my least favorite idea, for a few reasons. The few times I have tried, my partner usually makes some over powered characters. Plus, I am not the best at creating a character in this universe) The concept of the Keyblade War, has always been one I fancied. So, maybe our own Keyblade users, caught up in the mess.

Any thought you may have! 

Anything mentioned here, can be in any genre: Action/Adventure, Mystery, Romance. Or a mixture.  ________________________________________________

I hope anything above makes sense! 

Now onto my stuff, and contact stuff. 

Your Name/Nickname/Alias: Bocaj Age: 22 Time zone: EST  Add. Information: Born in the Year of the Rat, Also, a Hufflepuff. 

Literate/Semi-Literate/Basic (Script): Literate, no text talk or anything like that please.  Response Time: Varies throughout the day, but a few times a day. At least twice! Response Lengths: Again, varies. Bare minimum, a paragraph. More, usually.   POV: 3rd Past Tense, 1st when a character is in thought.

Original /Fandom: Fandom, please.  Canon Characters/Original: Usually, I stick to Canons. Might be open for OC’s.  Favored sexual orientations:  If things go in a romantic way, usually I like FxF, or MxF.

SFW/NSFW: SFW.  Limits/personal restrictions: Rape, super gory things. Puke, things with the bathroom. Underage stuff. Again I don’t usually do NSFW anyway/ Response Time Preferred: I ask, at least once a day, if not more. 

Contact Method/Roleplay Medium:: Email. My email is:  onesplendidbubble@gmail.com. 

Thanks for reading! 

[fyrapartnersearch]

Light, Darkness. And what lies Between (Kingdom Hearts)

As I often start my post with the series, :  "Good Tidings, Friends' 

-Xemnas, 358/2 Days. In, Where Nothing Gathers.  

Sorry, its just a quote that sticks out, for no real meaningful reason for me. Perhaps my love of 358/2 Days, but I digress. Thanks for reading this!  This post is all about Disney and Square's love child, of Kingdom Hearts. A series, I am not sure, would ever happen again. I love it all the same. 

With the Autumn Season slowly rolling in, I am in search of a more, Long-term partner to write with. Ideally, someone who loves the series, as I do. 

When it comes to knowledge of the series, I have played every game, including some of Union Cross; that said, I do not keep up with playing U.C, but watch videos on Youtube, when needed to be brought up to speed there. Mobile gaming like that, was never my thing. I enjoy a console, of sorts, rather than my phone or tablet being used. But that's just me. Some of my close friends love the game and playing on their phone- so I don't judge on that regard. 

As mentioned above, my favorite game in the series might be, 358/2 days. Kingdom Hearts II might be a close runner up, but the Sea-Salt Trio is my favorite trio, leading towards the bias. Though, the first game also has a special place in my heart too.... hmmm. 

Favorite character...? Also, a hard question. I love them all so much, but for this post, I will mention my love of Luxord. Something about the gambler always caught my eye- even in his small role in KHII. 

Enough about myself, let's move onto, possible plot/story ideas.  ____________________________________________________________

Everything mentioned here, is only thoughts/ideas, suggestions even. So, if there is something here, that sparks any idea of your own, feel free to mention or change anything! Open to any general thoughts you may have as well! 

Re-writing/Changing events.  While this plenty in the series, I love, I can not lie when there are some things I'd change. We can look at it, as AU type, or even, 'What-If'. One concept someone has suggested to me before, was changing who was place as head, of Castle Oblivion, during the events of Chain of Memories. Rather than Marluxia, let it be Luxord- due to his own motif fitting the card motif better. In return, having Marluxia playing a bigger role in the events to follow, can change up how KHII starts. Marluxia could still have his hopes to over-throw Xemnas and the Organization.  Another suggestion to throw out, is Kingdom Hearts III. Personally speaking, I rather enjoyed the game, but I see on Youtube quite often, 'My Rewrite of KHIII', so why not try one of our own? Might take a bit more to discuss what changes and ideas we want in. But, could be fun! 

Playing in the in-between periods:  As it suggests, writing in events/times not fully explored in the game. Riku's perspective during Days, Xehanort under Ansem the Wise's teachings. Kairi's life on the Islands, after the first game. Xehanort, Yen-Sid, and Erauqs's time, as students learning the way of the Key-blade. 

Crossovers/Universe Changing:  Basically, mixing something else with Kingdom Hearts, or Kingdom Hearts into something else.  One idea I have had, is a Cross-over with Persona 5. Both deal with Hearts...right?  Or, the KH characters, say in the World of Pokemon, Being Trainers and on a completely different Adventure! 

AU Settings:  I have seen images/Fan-art of the KH characters, in school uniforms. A school AU could be a more lighthearted approach. Something, like a Slice of Life Anime. Struggle could be the School's main sport. 

Playing with the Canon Characters, in Canon Events:  Kinda going in a way, the Manga does so. Adding more life, and such in the events. 

Our own Characters, in the Union Cross Universe:  (I will mark, this is my least favorite idea, for a few reasons. The few times I have tried, my partner usually makes some over powered characters. Plus, I am not the best at creating a character in this universe) The concept of the Keyblade War, has always been one I fancied. So, maybe our own Keyblade users, caught up in the mess.

Any thought you may have! 

Anything mentioned here, can be in any genre: Action/Adventure, Mystery, Romance. Or a mixture.  ________________________________________________

I hope anything above makes sense! 

Now onto my stuff, and contact stuff. 

Your Name/Nickname/Alias: Bocaj Age: 22 Time zone: EST  Add. Information: Born in the Year of the Rat, Also, a Hufflepuff. 

Literate/Semi-Literate/Basic (Script): Literate, no text talk or anything like that please.  Response Time: Varies throughout the day, but a few times a day. At least twice! Response Lengths: Again, varies. Bare minimum, a paragraph. More, usually.   POV: 3rd Past Tense, 1st when a character is in thought.

Original /Fandom: Fandom, please.  Canon Characters/Original: Usually, I stick to Canons. Might be open for OC's.  Favored sexual orientations:  If things go in a romantic way, usually I like FxF, or MxF.

SFW/NSFW: SFW.  Response Time Preferred: I ask, at least once a day, if not more. 

Contact Method/Roleplay Medium:: Email. My email is:  onesplendidbubble@gmail.com. 

  Thanks for reading! 

[ganymedesclock]

I’ve seen a couple of posts discussing how they don’t think Lotor is gonna stick to working with Team Voltron, but also that they’d feel bad if Allura gets her heartbroken because she’s clearly caring about him at this point...

Which... I don’t say this often as a Lotor fan who’s mostly in the camp of “you guys aren’t giving him enough credit” but I do think it’s very likely Lotor’s going to for some reason break off with Team Voltron for a while and settle back into being an antihero-antagonist before ultimately coming back around for the end of the series.

And y’know what I think? I think his friendship with Allura is completely sincere. There’s a lot of things I could point to about this- in particular, the fact that Lotor’s a method actor. He’ll fudge details and manipulate contexts, but he never straight up acts out something he doesn’t feel. Even in s4e3, the way he lies to Zarkon is using abandonment issues he genuinely has, that are completely Zarkon’s fault.

Lotor’s been studying Altea trying to feel connected to his heritage for a very long time. The Generals- the last group of people he took to- have many traits in common with Allura (they’re driven, proactive, calculating women)- and without them, it’s pretty obvious he’s quite lonely.

And if they’re doing what I think they’re doing- this could be an absolutely brilliant way to set up an allusion to the dynamic they had in DotU- the part of the dynamic where Lotor is Allura’s enemy, but hesitates and struggles with conflicting impulses because he doesn’t really want to fight her.

Letting them actually meet and become friends during a temporary allegiance is a nice way to let that happen without making Lotor a misogynistic sleazeball motivated by lust or someone who’s being “chivalrous” to the pretty girl which he can afford because she’s so much weaker than him- it sets them on much more equal footing.

Especially because of how much of an interesting hurt it’d be for both of them to go back to being enemies- for Allura, it’s a kick right back in the loss of Altea, in an area we’ve seen where she’s already quite sensitive, where she thought she could trust him, and much like her conflict with Keith in s2e8-s2e11, she’s going to have a lot of hurt she’s bringing to the table.

Lotor’s going to feel guilty because he’s already got reasons to doubt his own inclination to do things he feels like are necessary for survival, that he has no choice- that have burned him and people he cares about badly twice now (Narti, the White Lion) especially given how much emphasis he put on how Zarkon and Alfor used to be allies- and Zarkon betrayed Alfor.

Lotor and Zarkon may have very little in common, but the idea of following in his footsteps in any negative sense is gonna make Lotor squirm, big time. Especially because, while I don’t think this partnership is going to last, I don’t think that’s because Lotor never meant it, or planned to turn on them from the start- if anything, we see even in his initial altercations with Voltron he was very careful about when and where he provoked them, and if he had nothing to gain from getting their attention he genuinely tried to avoid them. 

At bare minimum, practicality would dictate that alienating Voltron is something he can’t afford. Given how precarious his grip on the throne is with the empire in civil war and how instrumental Voltron was in getting him there, those outlying commanders are gonna descend on him like a wolf pack if it doesn’t seem like he can call Voltron for help. When you’re surrounded by enemies, you really don’t want to shoot the one ally you have.

“But Clockie,” you might be saying, “didn’t you say yourself you think they’re gonna break off, and Allura is going to feel like he betrayed her?”

Yes.

Because we’ve seen Lotor make tactically unsound choices that he personally hates and doesn’t want to.

Personally, I think something is going to make Lotor go to Haggar- not the revelation that she’s Honerva, but, I think that might be something he’d exploit to flatter her (calling her “mother” and all). At this point, I’m not sure what exactly that would be- possibly knowing that Haggar has the power to revive the dead and trying to make amends by getting her to revive Narti with quintessence, possibly trying to steal Haggar’s greater knowledge of the rift.

It’s likely Sincline is going to reassemble under Haggar- which handily gets us our giant mecha fight that I still stand by, there’s no reason they would ever put in a second Voltron mecha and not have them duke it out. Especially when Sincline’s other-continuity predecessors- Predator Robeast, Dracotron, LoTron- have all had big climatic battles with Voltron, and 2/3 of them (Predator and LoTron) were controlled by Lotor himself.

But it’d also likely be the beginning of the end for the Generals’ relationship with Haggar. They might be estranged to Lotor, but if he makes amends enough that they work under him again... it stands that we saw in s3e5 and s4e3 that the Generals didn’t seem to realize quite the extent to which Zarkon and Haggar are cruel to their son. The whole team except Lotor is disturbed and shocked by the revelation that Haggar is having armed soldiers stalk him- and then when Zarkon puts the “kill on sight” order on Lotor’s head, they’re shaken.

But if Lotor goes to Haggar, and betrays Voltron to do it... we have a pretty good measurement for how Lotor’s going to respond.

The same way he responded to everything else he didn’t want to do but felt like he needed to for survival: Lotor’s gonna shut down.

This, narratively, would effectively build a lot of tension- if Lotor’s distant and quiet, it’d be hard to gauge how exactly he feels about betraying the team, if he regrets it, how he feels about the Generals again- and it’d nicely emphasize how even getting back together, even if he pays his way by fixing the damage he did at great personal expense (assuming he goes to Haggar to revive Narti) they’re not going to go back to being one big cozy family right away.

But even then... the Generals haven’t been able to completely turn off their empathy for Lotor. Of course not- there’s a reason why his seeming betrayal of them hurt. Their language and discussion of it in s4e5 and onward is rife with implications of, “we thought we could believe in him, we thought he’d protect us, we all trusted him, Narti trusted him.”

If Sincline unites as basically Haggar’s attack dog, Lotor’s also gonna stay in shutdown mode because that’s less painful than actually thinking about what he’s doing- easier to grit his teeth and tell himself that he needs this, he’s got his grand ideal of what they’re moving towards.

And that’s, ironically, going to be the wedge that I think drives the team away from Haggar. There’s a lot of facets in it- bringing Narti back is going to pull up the evidence that Haggar sabotaged them in the first place, the obvious evidence of Lotor’s parents’ abuse is going to get under the generals’ skin even when they’re not sure about reconnecting with Lotor, and even if Lotor is going against his own self-preservation to work with Haggar, he’s going to do everything he can to protect the generals, especially if he went into this to save Narti.

But that deeply unstable partnership could easily limp along just far enough that Lotor and the Generals could use Sincline to reopen the rift- so when it falls apart, Haggar can shrug it off and have exactly what she needs to go to full final boss. Heck, assuming they’re gonna bring Zarkon back for the final round in some form, that could be when she does it- finally giving him the full revival he’s been in need of since s2e13.

After all, they’re gonna need to really beef up the threat posed by the bad guys in order to call for two Voltrons to fight it. 

[beyondthebook]

Beyond the book: ‘The 5 AM Club’

“Many people want extraordinary things to happen to them, but that truly great people understand they can create those extraordinary events themselves”​

I never in my life thought that I’ll be promoting starting your day as early as 5 AM. After all, I used to go to sleep at this time back in my college days. Well… you learn, you understand and you grow. I started kicking off my day early due to professional commitments three years ago. Soon I realized there was something magical about it. When I read this book it helped me put a lot of things into context. As it turns out, it’s not just about waking up at 5 AM but using that time. I’ll try to highlight my takeaways from the book and add some nuances to it through this article. Enough of the pre-talk, let’s dig deep into this secret billionaire mantra.

5 AM FOR THE PRODUCTIVITY

Let me start with selling you the benefits of waking up at 5 AM. The scientific advantages of waking up early are:

When we wake up this early, our brain’s prefrontal cortex which processes rational thoughts is impaired. This temporarily silences your worries, doubts, and fears.

During this time of day, your brain is pre-programmed to stimulate the production of dopamine and serotonin, both of which will make you happier and give you a more peaceful start to the day.

Imagine starting your day with no negative self-talk, energy and peace. This will let you enable the flow state which is a mental state of ultimate focus. You can use this time to perform the most critical tasks as you are most productive in this state. But before you tap into the flow state, there is a morning ritual that can elevate this experience — the 20/20/20 formula.

20/20/20 FORMULA

It is a method to utilize your first hour of the day to further optimize your productivity. The principle of this formula is to use 20 minutes to move, 20 minutes to reflect and 20 minutes to grow.

In the first 20 minutes, we should do vigorous exercise. Sweat decreases the fear hormone in our brain and generates the protein BDNF, which promotes the formulation of new neural connections. This, in turn, makes our brain think faster. Due to our prefrontal cortex being impaired, our brain cannot process if we like exercising or not. This can be an added advantage and we can push through these 20 minutes even if we do not like exercising.

In the first 10 minutes of the next 20 minutes, we should reflect on our goals, frustrations, failures, etc. The next 10 minutes we can use to document the same in a journal. It is my favourite part as I can put all the burden of my thoughts on a piece of paper and continue my day with clear objectives. It takes a bit of practice but works wonders if you are someone who is like me and thinks a lot. If you have any time remaining you can use it for meditating.

The last 20 minutes are used to learn. We can use this time to read about innovation, or learn about a business, or listen to a podcast that stimulates our thought. We can use this time to learn something that can add value to our career.

MULTI-TASKING IS A MYTH

Multi-Tasking is an amazing concept when it is applied to our gadgets. However, our brain is not made to perform multiple high-functioning tasks at once. When we think that we are multi-tasking, we are actually switching between the tasks and it is not efficient. We have limited mental energy for the day and it’s always better to use it towards the things that we care about.

DISOBEYING THE DISTRACTIONS

Distractions are often the key elements that take away your productivity. It can be as simple as reacting to our smartphone notification while working on an important task. Now, I just want to make it clear that I am not saying that we should become robots and just focus on our work. I make no compromises giving my time to do things that I love. When I say important tasks and distraction, I mean tasks that are important to YOU and distractions are the tasks that are not important to you. When I am working on such key tasks I prefer to switch off my notification and just keep my phone on vibrate for any emergency calls. If you have a hard time prioritizing tasks then you can make use of the Time Management Matrix. You can learn more about it here and I’ll try to cover it in some of my future articles.

UPSKILLING BY ACCOMPLISHING SMALL THINGS DAILY

In this modern industrial revolution where knowledge is practically free, we must constantly invest some time in ourselves for upskilling. We often tend to focus on achieving some big things occasionally and then being on the sidelines for a while. I believe this approach has been inherited by us from the way we use to study in our schools. We use to enjoy our time and once the exams were near we’ll take our battle gears out and prepare for the war. Ahh! it makes me all nostalgic. Well, we must understand that it is not the right way of learning. Learning and honing your skills should be a continuous and consistent habit. I devote a section of my day to personal development. I take this time to learn and practice the skills that will help me in my career or sometimes if they seem very interesting.

The key to help you upskill in the right direction is capitalizing on your talent. We often get discouraged and feel that we don’t have what it takes by seeing how talented others are in a certain field. However, what we must focus on is what we are good at and then improve our skills and knowledge by investing time into developing it. By doing so we become more positive and gain confidence.

THE FOUR INTERIOR EMPIRES

We all have 4 interior empires and all of them are connected. These empires are Mindset, Heartset, Healthset, and Soulset. Unlike the historical empires, all these empires must function properly for us to be the best version of ourselves.

MINDSET: We live in a fast-paced world that is driven by change. It is a place where start-ups can reach unicorn status overnight while established firms can lose billions over a tweet. In this world of chaos, we must constantly keep working on our mindset. We can train our attention on making our daily micro-achievements; reflect on our failures but focus on the positives. By doing so we can mitigate the negative bias of our brain.

HEART-SET: This empire deals with taking care of our emotional well-being. We can take a step towards that by expressing our emotions more frequently; by creating an open communication channel with our peers and loved ones.

HEALTH-SET: This empire deals with taking care of our physical well-being. I recall an interview of Warren Buffet where he put forward a cogent argument about physical well-being — Imagine if we could choose any car but there was a stipulation that we have to use the same car for the rest of our life. How well would we take care of it? I would probably take care of it like my own baby. Now, think about our body in the same way. We just have this one body for the rest of our life. The bare minimum we can do is exercise daily and try to eat right. Right?

SOUL-SET: This empire deals with taking care of our spirituality. It does not mean that we have to enroll ourselves in a religion. It means that we should find something that keeps us centred and help us connect with the truest version of ourselves. It can be simple things like taking a walk in nature, or meditating, or even praying. I personally enjoy sitting on my balcony with my thoughts and gazing at trees.

A simple hack to working on each of the interior empires is by implementing the 20/20/20 formula.

SLEEP AND HAVE FUN

Sleep is one of the key factors in determining life expectancy. It is important to manage a good 6–8 hours of sleep for our recovery and to avoid burnouts. If we want to continue operating at high productivity then we must maintain the cycle of passionate work and deep renewal through sleep. Yet, we are a sleep-deprived generation and technology can be pinpointed as the primary reason for sleep deprivation. To be precise, the blue light emitted from our smartphones, TVs, Laptops, etc reduces melatonin. Melatonin is chemical in our body that promotes sleep. In order to counter this, some studies suggest we must disconnect ourselves from these devices at least 2 hours before we sleep. I can understand it may seem like a difficult task as we are habituated with our routine but it can be accomplished. I have allocated this time for talking to my loved ones over a call. If you live with your partner or a friend you can play some indoor game or discuss your day. You can make your own routine and try to avoid the blue light radiations before the sleep.

Lastly, have some fun! Allocate some time of your day for doing the activities that you enjoy without worrying about them adding value to your day. Not everything is supposed to contribute to your career growth. Do not feel guilty about enjoying your me-time. I like watching YouTube for short while. Some videos that I watch are informative and some are pure entertainment. But who cares, I enjoy that time and most importantly, it makes me happy.

Thank you for taking your time and reading this article. I hope you find some takeaways from this article that helps you in managing your day.

Word of the article: Cogent (adjective) — Clear, Logical, or Convincing

[sugawara-kkoushi]

How I ship Gency:

I like to think that Angela is a kind but very very tired soul that continues to push herself beyond her limits for the good of humanity. She's constantly trying to improve medical science and works long hours to make it happen. She will sometimes go days without sleep on the job and forget to eat. Over the years, it has made her jaded - almost dead inside. But she does what she must.

One day, a body is rushed to her by Blackwatch all the way from Japan. She has never seen this man - or what's left of him - before, but he's obviously very important to Overwatch's interests if he was rushed to her to be saved. So she begins the grueling process of breathing life back into his body. Thanks to the advances in medicine that she has pioneered, she is able to save the miraculous, weak heartbeat in him. Regardless, she still works for months slowly rebuilding him and salvaging any organic parts possible. All the while he is comatose.

The first time he awakens, he is disoriented, angry, and violent. Angela has to call for back up to restrain him so she can explain where he is, what has happened, and that he is safe. Gabriel Reyes enters during this time. Reyes doesn't beat around the bush. He tells the man - Shimada Genji - that he was saved because they need his knowledge of the Shimada clan in order to dismantle it - that he will be instrumental in taking down his family business. Angela is horrified. She'd never been told to what end Overwatch needed this man - only that he held valuable information. She only guessed who or what he could be. Perhaps an important diplomat or undercover agent - but not an outsider. Not someone who would be in their debt for life. Her operations on him were costly. There was no way Overwatch would do that and expect nothing in return. Though they worked for the safety of the world - Angela knew they were not a charity.

She shoots a piercing glare in Reyes' direction - saying silently, "This is NOT what I signed up for! We WILL talk about this later!" Reyes ignores her look. He waits for Shimada's response. The man is silent. Thinking. After a pregnant pause, his gaze crawls up to their faces and a chill runs through Angela's spine.

"I could be more than just information," he says with seething rage boiling in his eyes. Reyes lifts an eyebrow. Angela can't breathe. Shimada continues, "It would be my pleasure to assist in destroying my brother's empire." His lips curl at the word brother.

Reyes and Shimada exchange hard stares at one another. Reyes is the first to speak. "What are you asking, boy?"

"Let me personally assist on this project. On the field. I know more secrets than just the business of the empire - and how to exploit them. I am already a trained fighter with extensive experience in stealth and... Other fields of interest to your organization." The menace in his gaze reveals that he speaks the truth.

Angela leaves abruptly. She doesn't need to look at Reyes to know that he will accept Shimada's offer. She is so very tired.

She assists in Shimada's recovery. She fine-tunes his motor skills. She helps him learn to walk again. She helps familiarize him with his new functions... She refuses to comply with Blackwatch's request to integrate weaponry into his cybernetic body. She hates weapons. She hates violence - it's what stole her parents from her in the war. She has only ever killed in battle when absolutely necessary and in self-defense, and she has no intention of making instrument of death.

They confiscate her medical files on Shimada-san. She is told she will no longer be his overseeing doctor. She does not see him for a long time.

She cannot help but worry about him. She spent months caring for him in his most vulnerable state, yet here he is working for Blackwatch with cybernetic weapons and enhancements. His new armor covers his face. She has not seen it since the day he awoke.

Over the years, she occasionally hears of strides made in the Shimada Empire Project. Inside jobs. Sabotage. Assassinations. She always thinks of Shimada-san.

Then everything goes to hell.

With the Swiss headquarters razed to the ground and Overwatch outlawed by the PETRAS Act, Angela is alone and so very tired. Overwatch and Blackwatch agents have scattered across the Earth, she among them. Despite the weight of the world on her shoulders, she can't help but wonder in the back of her mind what Shimada will do now. His rage and bitterness had driven his actions since the day he was revived. Where would he go with no organization or project? She worries.

A year passes. She receives a letter - a hand-written letter?? It's covered with postage and forwarding stamps to multiple addresses. It is from Shimada. The contents are awkward with apologies and abundant with reluctance at even writing to her. He is apparently staying with the Shambali monks in Nepal under the teachings of Zenyatta Tekhartha. He writes that Zenyatta insisted that he begin writing letters to someone in his life as a part of his healing process. Healing process? He ends the letter with an apology for bothering her.

"Healing process"... Her heart warms at the thought. She writes him back, expressing that she is not bothered by his letters and informing him of her current mailing address for future ones.

For the next three years she looks forward to every letter. She is still overworked. Still trying to better the world. Still so very tired. But his letters remind her that working to help others heal is valid and worth the pain. His transformation is gradual, but evident. At first he is guarded - only sharing bare minimum details of his lessons. As they exchange letters, however, she begins to see his walls crumble as he shares more personal thoughts and feelings. He even starts to inject wry humor into his script. She doesn't know for certain, and maybe it could never truly be this way, but Angela believes she is getting to meet the man from before the fight with his brother. He asks that she refer to him by his first name, Genji, so that he is not reminded of the name he shares with his brother, Hanzo.

Genji still refers to her as Miss Ziegler.

The Overwatch recall blindsides her, yet she travels to Gibraltar as soon as possible... She knows where she belongs. She writes Genji from Gibraltar informing him of her new address. She does not receive a reply. She worries.

One day, several weeks after the recall, a stranger covered from head to toe in intricately designed garments appears on their doorstep, an omnic companion in tow. Winston greets them hesitantly, Angela unconsciously stands slightly behind the gorilla. The stranger stares past Winston and into Angela's face, saying nothing at first. Several moments pass. The omnic places a hand on the man's shoulder, and he seems to relax a bit. He is hesitating. Why? Slowly, the man lifts his hands to undo the headdress covering his face, all the while keeping his gaze locked on Angela.

A moment more passes as he unties the cloth around his head. Then all at once the headdress is off, leaving his face naked.

Rich brown eyes meet hers, steadied with courage. Pale, old scars marble his face, crawling upward and across his cheeks, nose, and lips. His mechanical jaw clenches in apprehension. His black hair is plastered to his forehead from the headdress he'd been wearing not long ago.

Angela cannot breathe as she looks upon the face that she has not seen since the day she revived him.

Genji.

She is hugging him before she realizes what she's doing. His arms hover over her back, shock evident in his face. Pulling back and wiping joyful tears from her eyes, she apologizes for surprising him."But," she adds with a wry smile "you surprised me first! So we are even."

The shock in his eyes melts into something softer that she cannot name. He chuckles. "I suppose you are right, Miss Ziegler."

She feels a prick of annoyance at his formality, but quickly squashes it. After all, she's just heard him laugh for the first time. She smiles genuinely. "You seem well, Genji."

What passes across his expression can be described as nothing other than the purest of inner tranquility. The corners of his lips upturn just slightly. His gaze is soft, unguarded as he looks into her eyes. The shadows of the violent rage that boiled in his soul so many years ago are nowhere to be found. "I am a different man now. I am whole."

Her heart squeezes. Tears blur her vision and she cannot help grinning as the joy for him thrums throughout her body. "...That is wonderful!" she manages.

She is the furthest thing from tired.

---

Sometimes people need to heal before love can blossom. Falling in love is not the cure-all. But loving others, building those relationships through the thick of it all - that is one of the most important bonds you can ever have.

[archivesdiveronarpg]

Congratulations, VIC! You’ve been accepted for the role of BENVOLIO. This was an incredibly difficult decision for me to make because both apps we received for Benvolio were amazing. But they both captured such different sides of him, that my heart was torn in two. There is a certain tragedy, though, that I had never really thought of when it came to Benvolio. He’s affected by the war in a way that no other character is -- and Vic, you brought that vision up so vividly that I felt as if I couldn’t deny you. I cannot wait for what Benvolio will bring to the table. Welcome to Diverona!  Please read over the checklist and send in your blog within 24 hours.

                                                                            WELCOME TO THE MOB.

Out of Character

Alias | Vic

Age | 18

Preferred Pronouns | They/them

Activity Level | I’m rather busy Tuesdays, Thursdays, and Fridays, but am freer on the other days of the week! My activity level’s probably at an 8/10.

Timezone | EST, most of the time- CST during breaks.

In Character

Character | Benvolio ; Bellamy Santo Domingo

What drew you to this character? | In the play, Benvolio was coincidentally present for many of the conflicts between the Montagues and the Capulets, and he tries to diffuse most of the fights he encounters. He’s a peacemaker and brutally honest in recounting various situations, rather than being even the slightest bit biased to his own side. His name literally means ‘good will’, but I wanna’ see him written as something other than a typical doormat character (his yearning for peace doesn’t make a difference in the end), as he’s kinda’ portrayed as the classic nice guy in the play. I really want to play a man who’s stuck between the shackles of filial piety and loyalty to his family and his own dreams and desires. Essentially, he’s a martyr-type character; perhaps not the kinda’ martyr where he dies for the cause, but he gave up his freedom and dreams in order to serve the family and that’s also a kind of slow death. I see him as a gentle person; in any situation he’d first attempt to work things out by talking, but he’s also not regretful for resorting to violence if the other party tries to harm those he considers family. He’s a tragic character, but he also doesn’t seem to show it. He’d gladly give up everything for his family, but what happens when the desires of the famiglia are in conflict with his own morality?

What is a future plot idea you have in mind for the character? |  I’d like to see Benvolio struggling between what is right and what is easy. (Perhaps not even he knows which is which.) He deeply values his family and the bonds that he creates with other people, but he’s not a mindless soldier: his desires for flight and peace are deeply rooted into him. Where other people might’ve become demons and conquerors when faced with violence at such a young age, he grew up to be a pacifist. However, given the nature of his upbringing, I’d like to think that he wouldn’t shy away from violence either, when the situation calls for it. There’s this heavy burden on his shoulders, multiplied by each person he’s ever killed. Perhaps he views death as a mercy, and perhaps he yearns for something <i>more</i> than just mindless violence.

I. Bellamy might look upon the Three Witches of Verona with something that’s less akin to awe than it is to envy and wonder; they don’t <i>need</i> to fight, and that’s something he’s always hungered for. Let none say that Bellamy isn’t ambitious, that avarice and want hasn’t been bred into him, for he <i>burns</i> for the possibility of peace. The Witches are held above the petty fights of the Capulets and Montagues; they’re the closest thing to peace he knows. I’d like to see him seeking them out, with full knowledge that they might only deign to toy with him, but wanting to secure an alliance with them nevertheless. Not for their power, for though his words are silken and soothing, he’s not a manipulative person in such a way. (sometimes he fears for the day when he must use his words in a more poisonous fashion.) He simply would like to know how they view peace and how they achieved such a goal. Perhaps he desires friends who he doesn’t need to speak of war to. It’s a far-fetched dream, he knows, but he’d undertake the self-assigned mission nevertheless. It would be in secret, for if he succeeds, he would not want to be torn in half by duties and freedom again. (when has want of friendship become a piece to be played?)

II. Roman’s his Boss, and any other person’d probably try and use that brotherly bond between them for their own gain. Bellamy, however, may only hint at his desire for Roman to be more peaceable in his dealings with the Capulets; said family might think it to be a weakness, and Bellamy has no desire to make things even harder for Roman. On his days off, he might try and make friendly acquaintances with neutral players, or perhaps even other famiglia members who’re more receptive to cordial overtures. What happens if he has to fight them, though?

III. I see Bellamy as an existentialist, and thus as a student of that particular school of thought, he believes that “…the individual can choose. He is inevitably committed in a situation or a certain social and historic context. But in any event, we undertake, and we engage our responsibility because our freedom is total. Even the one who refuses to act, or to undertake, chooses. His retreat, his “abstention” are still forms of actions, or choices. The man doesn’t escape his freedom, and his responsibilities. ‘’The man is condemned to be free”, which can seem paradoxical”. I want to see him struggle in killing someone; he returned to Verona, the bloody cesspool, after four years of freedom and travel. Inevitably, he cannot blame the act of killing a person on another circumstance or person; it will all fall upon his shoulders. I want to see him struggle with knowing full well that he ended a life- and that in choosing to end a life, he also snuffed out a being of infinite potential. Death is final, and how would he deal with that?

In Depth

The following THREE questions must be answered in-character, and in para form (quotations, actions written out if applicable, etc). There is no minimum or maximum limit for your response - simply answer as you would were you playing the character.

What is your favorite place in Verona?

Heavy lashes feather across the slant of his eyes as the lounging male allows a slow breath to fill his lungs. There is a small smile playing around the corner of Bellamy’s mouth, even as his gaze cuts through dark cillia at an angle. His head tilts just the slightest bit, and lightly chapped lips part in order to let a thoughtful tenor ripple through the air. “I suppose it’s sitting on the Castelvecchio Bridge,” he muses, dark irises absently laced with self-directed amusement. “It’s,” a pause as he searches for words, “freeing, in a sense.”

Each syllable is carefully moulded from his mouth, and the curve of his laugh is tucked underneath reserved mirth. “The air’s fresh, the water’s clear, and on good days, you can see fish flicking their tails at your reflection. Hardly anyone passes by, much less sits there like I do, and I find it fairly relaxing. There’s something about watching fish and water, something timeless and beautiful about the bridge between two warring sides.” Here, the intent of his gaze affixes upon the questioner, firmly present in a way that he hadn’t been while recounting. “As long as that bridge is standing, as long as I can watch the fish from that very bridge, I will believe in the inevitability of peace.”

The set of his features morphs into something rather teasing as he adds, “I won’t let it burn, though. I’d miss watching the fish too much.”

What does your typical day look like?

Bellamy’s gaze diverts towards an open window, and for a second there’s a tension in the air, as if he longs to catapult himself from the ledge and catch the breeze like a bird. Slowly, he starts speaking. “I- before my parents called me back, I’d travel wherever the wind took me.” His head tips back, the slender baring of his throat at odds with the quiet assurance that wraps around him like a cloak, before his regard cascades back towards the questioner. “Now, whenever I don’t have jobs, I usually visit To Tame a Soup, and help out there whenever I’m not on the bridge.” A self-deprecating smile rewrites the curve of his mouth. “Otherwise, I’m practicing parkour.” There’s something faintly nostalgic lacing through his eyes. “It’s the closest I can get to freedom nowadays. Doesn’t hurt that it also counts as exercise,” and he offers a quick wink.

What are your thoughts on the war between the Capulets and the Montagues?

His gaze darkens, and suddenly he is Atlas with the burden of the sky. “It is, in a word, pointless,” he pronounces, averting his gaze from the window. “An endless cycle of vengeance dogs every step Verona takes-” He shifts in his seat, artfully easing against the slope of the settee. “-and no one will do a thing to stop it. Where do we end? Do we stop once everyone has been killed?” The slant of his eyes burns with an almost fervent prayer. “Do we stop once every son and every daughter is slain and fed to the dogs? Every action in our dear Verona brings its own cycle of death and destruction- where do we stop?” Bellamy allows his eyes to flutter shut and he is Icarus, shackled to the earth when he once knew flight. “My apologies.” How else would a martyr react towards the chains of loyalty, when those very chains direct him to become a creature of blood and destruction?

In-Character Para Sample:

An onyx gaze slips across the veneer of the airport, the slightest tilt to his lips marking the faint happiness he felt upon seeing the myriad of colorful people, all milling about and chattering to one another about different destinations. The airport is the center of many worlds colliding, the starting and ending point for many. A huff of laughter emerges from his lips as he dips down to collect a newspaper from a lady who’d accidentally bumped into him. “Apologies, madame,” spoken smoothly as he offers it back to the woman, eyes shifting across the surface in a cursory glance.

Those who knew him would be able to tell when he’d suddenly felt the very same staccato beats of eminent doom shackled upon his wrists and ankles, though he merely offered another closed-mouth smile and slipped away. Calloused fingers wrapped around the structure of a chair, and with a light tug, he pulled it out and eased himself down. A vague thought crossed his mind to forcibly stop his digits from trembling, and as he inhaled, he numbed himself to the inevitability of an end to his travels.

Romeo needed him. His family needed him. How could he- How could he ever say no? He has already taken leave for selfish reasons, and he felt that sin weigh upon his very soul. What if- What if he was there? Would the situation have turned out any differently?

No. Chapped lips pressed lightly together, and lashes feathered across the slant of his eyes.

If he dared, he would’ve allowed a slightly frantic laugh to escape his tongue, but they were in public and who knew where enemies lurked? Once again, he was brought into the rhythm of paranoia and revenge. Once again, he was on his way to Verona, beloved city, hated city.

His phone rang. Breath in, breath out- He steeled himself and his hand drifted toward his cell. “Hello?”

All he could hear was the thump-thump of his heart beating a butterfly rhythm, and all he could see was the newspaper in his mind’s eye. Mechanically, he replied. “Yes. I’ll be home soon.”

Extras:

Parkour: He’s rather passionate about parkour, even though it was Roman who’d first brought him and Mercutio into the art. Nowadays, you can probably catch him up on the highest spires and dangling his feet from a rooftop. It’s the closest he can get to the sky, and also the closest feeling to freedom. Doesn’t hurt that it keeps him agile.

Tea: Rather than whiskey or coffee, the drink he indulges the most in is tea, as it’s both healthy and lighter than the rich taste of alcohol and coffee.

[heroesoftherepublic-blog]

Crash Course

The Third Class Princess woke up coughing, surrounded by wet mist and toxic smoke. Around her the ship crumbled to pieces; covering her mouth and staring at the nearest monitor, she was quick to accept the inevitable.

The ship had endured more than eighty years of voyage, twenty more than they expected it to survive. As a transport vessel its days were over, but what a wonderful pyre it would be. The Princess speed in her search, knowing that to die as Second Class she would have to play an active role in her own end.

She opened a side panel, in which against the protests of her companion she had smuggled various weapons, as well as additional internal sensors that answered only to her. The only active life-signs were hers and the shaky movements of another being.

Confident that an assault would not be an immediate risk, she ran towards the prow of the ship. The majority of the systems she found destroyed beyond repair, the culprit laying down in the middle of the chaos, the resting projectile of a fire-thrower of the Hegemony.

The Princess approached, sweating comets. If one of these were to blow inside the hull would be enough to reduce the entire ship to dust. A cable moved, making her turn and point a weapon in that direction. The figure of a lean mean of long fingers emerged from the darkness, narrowing his eyes in disapproval, finally giving a side glance towards the engine of destruction.

“Do not worry about this.” Slave-Scientists had no grades or classes, and even if they had, not a single category could encompass all of Prodótis unique genius. “I disarmed it. The damage has been done but at least we will not be claimed by fire.”

“There is still time for that to change. How did the Hegemony find us? So many years traveling, through the furthest routes and uncharted systems to avoid interception.” The Princess lifted her head, haughty towards Fates. “All to end in the cold void that birthed us. So be it, but let it not be said that Iphigenia left reality shivering in a corner.” 

“Probe-Escapeboats.” The Slave-Scientist choose to ignore the more fatalistic words of the woman, focusing in different levels of the issue at hand than those that worried the Princess. She was paying attention to his tired eyes and weakened limbs; he had not been roused by the conflict, clearly wandering for a long-time before performing repairs. The mystery of the integrity of the ship was not a mystery any longer. “They patrol between the systems of captivity worlds, aiming for even the weakest life-signs they detect, all to prevent any escape. Treacherous nasty things but nothing compared to the great ships that pursue us.”

“At least I get to bid your farewell.” The Princess held his shriveled form within her arms. “My dearest accomplice, who will carry the torch of rebellion now?”

“You will.” Something groaned behind Iphigenia, the woman feeling a painful twinge in her neck before she could turn around. Her eyes rolled, Prodótis stuffing her mouth with a torn rag just in case she would bite her own tongue. “I was hoping to not have to proceed with this plan, unfortunately there is no other way. Relax, Princess, try to remember everything you are, for all of that must be sent.”

Lights blinked, Iphigenia almost falling unconscious. The Slave-Scientist had fully mapped her ego, all in order to send her across the starts to accomplish their mission.

“What will be of you?”

He averted his gaze, measuring how many lies he could tolerate to bear.

“There is not enough time or energy to send another complete copy. I had some older backups, out of date but trustworthy. I can slice some personality of, pick my knowledge apart and assemble it into something somehow resembling intellect.

“A horrible man until the end.” Iphigenia coughed, holding Prodótis’ hand. “I forbid you from send me. If only one can go, it must be you. You are the one that can craft all those beautiful things that offered the glimpse of a universe beyond want and the evil it spews forth.”

“Cruelty still reigns over the world that is your destination, Iphigenia. I would not survive alone in such savagery. It must be you, there are no alternatives worth discussing.” The Slave-Engineer kissed her with more despair than passion. “No matter how broken I am, find me. No matter what it takes, promise me you will never give up looking for me. We already lost too much time, I cannot stand another life without you.”

She closed her mouth, trying to form the right words. Her eyes shut for the last time, promises unsaid.

 *

 Orcus felt the Sun burning their face, rising his end to protect their large eyes. She felt blindly for their hat, failing to find it. Bored and with little patience left, they forced themselves to open their eyes, letting only the bare minimum light slip between their fingers.

They caught the glimpse of something just as golden and bright.

Lidia stood on top of them, hers long loose hairs, hood lowered as she tried on their rustic hat.

“Does it fit me as well as it fits you?” She asked, adjusting it slightly. “A bit too large for my empty head.”

It could not be real. It must be some more of the Greek’s trickery. Orcus’ heart betrayed them, for a moment forcing them to share the memory of blond child, dilapidated and snotty, also holding their hat.

Them dared to believe that even immortal giants could have their dreams come true. They pushed her aside and got up, looking around to their sheep, grazing or resting under that shadow of the few trees atop the rolling hills of Etruria. They were not imagining things, that woman was really there. Lidia embraced them, all of their considerable girth, crying unabashed by any of the dignity expected of an adult woman. Pure, unrestrained emotion.

“Sorry, sorry, sorry! All that happened has been my fault, Orcus.” Lidia refused to release them. “If I had stayed here, the others would still be alive. I could have protected them.”

Orcus did not project any in response to that. They had escaped whatever had destroyed the previous group by severing the tenuous ties they shared with them. Wars and departures had changed the tone of the Corvii into something they could no longer call family.

Finally, Lidia let them loose.

“My actions since my return let much to be desired. I am yet to take the reins in a way that my responsabilidades demand. I was so convicted that I would restore the Nest, offer New Corvus to Rome.

While the giant was happy to once again see Lidia, they had no patience for those weak of confidence and lacking in conviction, preferring to turn their attentions to the cattle instead. In a gesture of gentle affection, they send to Lidia an image of herself, glorious while leading a small legion of Triumphants.

“An army?” Lidia covered her mouth, chuckling. “I would be happy with five.”

The good humour quickly vanished once the woman finally noticed the burns across Orcus’ arm. Without waiting for permission, she grabbed the limb and got her face closer to it, eyes bulging and gaping mouth.

“Impossible, how did someone manage to hurt you?” Aeneid touched Orcus’ gray skin with her nose and took a deep breath. “You have not been bathing in the Styx, not that would change much for you. And the wound is a quite fresh one. Who could have done this? Goats never had strong elementarists, Phoenix had that Dido Felix or what was her name, and she died without a replacement during the Punic War. No faction in this corner of the world should have someone this powerful.”

Orcus pulled their arm against their chest, gently massaging it. To ease Lidia’s speculations, they presented her with a recolection of the events that had transpired, a young woman rushing across portals and corridors underneath Etruscan catacombs. She did not seem to be there willingly, fearful of every shadow, her face twisted by terror; something jumped towards her, forcing her to call down a pillar flames.

“That garb does not leave much space for doubt. That was a Vestalis.” Lidia crossed her arms, describing circles around Orcus. “There are at least four temples of Vesta whose communities still support the old priest oder. It might not be much but limits my search to less than thirty people, that is already something.”

She stared at Orcus, her eyebrows arching in a pronounced manner.

“If you know something, you must tell me, Orcus. The wrong people cannot get to her before I do. Rome needs her. I need her.”

Nothing.

Lidia adjusted her aim.

“Who is Quirinus, Orcus.”

One of the sheep bleated.

“Who is Quirinus, Orcus.”

Orcus looked to Aeneid top to bottom. They put one of their enormous hands over the tall woman’s shoulder.

“There is no way he could be one of us, right? I am ready to do all that I need, but I can’t raise my hand against one of us.

Instead of a reply, Orcus grabbed Lidia as if she was not heavier than a child, holding her in theirarms and walking away with heavy steps. As their living beard caressed the woman’s face, they showed her a vision of the Nest. Not the ruin, the true nest.

“Alright, enough talk. Let’s go home.”