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torawro · 2 years

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HOME IS WHERE THE HEART IS. ( a. h )

pairing ! ━━ aki hayakawa x fem! reader

cw ! ━━ minors/ageless blogs do not interact. reader is black + thick coded but you don’t have to imagine it that way. basically boyfriend!aki who is very soft for his princess we luv him for that <3 lots of fluff and like…introspective moments? suggestive themes. descriptions of smoking.

word count ! ━━ 3.7k

notes ! ━━ this is an expanded version of this ask & the art used came from this post. ive been wanting to write this for a while, but ive been putting it off bc i wanted to start/work on other things and wasn’t sure if this would even be any good. but the akirot has fermented and here we are <3 i love writing soft love scenarios (i’ve been a sucker for them lately) so this is what this is. i hope y’all enjoy ! REBLOGS ARE HEAVILY APPRECIATED!

AKI HAYAKAWA WAS A. . . PERSONAL MAN. he cherished every little thing that he was blessed with very profoundly, and held them close to his heart, where they would be safe within its hardened, cold exterior. he protects these things— these emotions, these ideas, these people—with all his might, because he knew very well, maybe even better than anyone, that tomorrow was never promised.

he values the things he’s received even on a subconscious level, where he doesn’t actively realize that’s what it is: him caring to such an uncanny extent. it was like that with the first cigarettes he ever received from himeno, it was the same regarding his friendship with denji and power—

and it was ultimately the case with you. especially with you, matter of fact.

this explains why the two of you were pressed up against each other in a yearning embrace. aki had comfortably sandwiched you in between the wall and his firm body, while just a few feet away was the front door, where his devil-like subordinates waited outside.

he was very personal about you and the relationship you shared with him, the trust and the genuine connection that tethered both your hearts and souls to one another. he didn’t even want mere glances from the likes of denji and power to taint this special thing he held so tenderly in his big, calloused hands. their teasing of aki being “so whipped” for you fell on deaf ears the moment his closed your door with his foot and his fingers came in contact with your skin.

it wasn’t exactly a lie, he supposed.

the kiss was drawn out. longing, and wistful. it was slow enough for you to savor hints of every delicacy that clung to the walls of his mouth, and he did the same to you, low sounds of pleasure threatening to escape his throat. you tasted the spearing blanket of peppermint that coated the other flurry of flavors on aki’s lips and tongue, like the stale aroma of the cigarettes he smoked an hour ago, and the tangy cocktail he drank with his meal. and you loved it.

the dark-haired male sensually swiped his tongue across your bottom lip, effectively licking off most of the lip gloss you wore. gently, he tugged on your bottom lip with his teeth, before letting the pink muscle slither in between the barrier known as your lips; you tasted the gloss that you’ve been wearing all night.

you whined into his mouth when aki tugged at your bottom lip again— a little firmer and more yearning this time—and you followed his movements, perfectly in sync with one another. you melted into his taut chest when one of the hands that held onto your waist slipped past the material of your long, fitted cardigan and found its way under your ribbed tank top. his hands felt like ice against your warm skin and caused you to shudder at his touch. his palms gently squeezed and unclenched at your fleshy sides as a way to ground you back to him.

after what felt like an eternity, the rest of the world around you completely muted, aki finally pulled away from the kiss, his forehead dipped slightly to your height and rested against yours. your breathing patterns became harmonized with each other’s after a few seconds.

this. . . moments like these were precious to aki. it was personal to him, and it was all his.

“fuck. . . . . i’ve been wanting to kiss you like that since the moment we picked you up earlier” he confessed in a breathy voice. it was almost unusual to hear your boyfriend be so forward or use expletives so casually—he was usually such a composed man— but you found his words arousing, and you bit your lip to contain the giggle that wanted to escape. perhaps it was that fruity alcoholic beverage he drank, and the four subsequent glasses he consumed afterwards that made him so. . . so—

another chaste kiss on the corner of your mouth pulled you out of your thoughts. and then another a little farther down. then a third and fourth back on your lips. you couldn’t help the loving smile that morphed onto your face, finding his affections extremely endearing.

letting your fingers ascend from his shoulders to the back of his neck, your french tipped fingers numbly scratched at the back of his head. the dull sensation on his scalp was almost relaxing, but it also made his heartbeat continuously skip several beats. if aki were a cat, he swore he would have purred.

“hmm, aren’t you too cute?” you cooed teasingly, earning you a faux irritated roll of his eyes from him. “but don’t you have to get up early for work tomorrow? you and others should get going, it’s getting late.”

your boyfriend let his eyes flutter close, inhaled deeply, and threw his hand back to exhale, a soft groan getting caught in the mix.

“yeah, i do . . . . but i’d honestly rather not go back with those two. working with them is one thing but living with them on top of it is something else entirely. they’re complete pigs, it’s disgusting. and having them in my personal space feels like hell every day.”

you chuckled airily at his childlike complaints, while allowing your other hand to shift to cup his face. “i totally understand. it can be hard, but just take it one day at a time, okay? and be patient with them.” you put extra emphasis on the word patience because you knew how aki could get if provoked enough.

the devil hunter groaned again, letting his head hang until it fully rested on your shoulder. he still wasn’t fond of denji and power being placed under his care or being in his space, but he didn’t mind you in his. matter fact, it’s something he’d grow to crave more and more as the days went by. it was unbecoming for a man like him, but he couldn’t find it within himself to care all that much.

“now go! denji and power are waiting for you,” your voice trailed off and morphed into a more sing-song tone, which aki didn’t find amusing. but still, he sucked it up and stood at his full height with a heavy sigh.

“fine.” if you squinted hard enough, it almost looked like he was pouting. “gimme a kiss first.” he mumbled with a titled head, trailing his hands up and down your waist.

your chest tightened in glee when his already deep voice grew darker, just a little heavier, that you could feel it’s weight on your waist where his hands rested; you were obsessed with his voice, especially when it was unable to conceal his obvious desire for you. happily obliging to his request, the both of you leaned in for a sweet peck, the noise of your lips softly smacking and then finally separating tugging a rare smile at aki’s lips. just as you were about to pull away, aki’s ample hands immediately grabbed the back of your neck and held it in place so you couldn’t move.

“wait, one more baby” his grumbled again, his tone thicker than before. how could you deny him when he looked at you like that and asked so nicely? so, you gave what he (and you) both wanted.

“mmm just— just one more. this is the last one, i promise.”

it was, in fact, not the last one. he’d say ‘one more’ five more times (and you’d give in every single time) before you had to literally pry him off. as you ushered him towards the door, with his hand on the doorknob, he assured you in a soft voice that he’ll come to see you the following weekend, because this week was supposedly going to be very busy for him.

“i’ll see you soon, alright? stay safe. call me if you need anything.” he planted one final, gentle kiss on your forehead. it was his own personal way of saying ‘i love you’.

maybe he’ll work up the courage to actually say those three weighty words one day. a part of him wanted that day to be sooner rather than later.

“you’re the one who needs to be careful, out here killing devils and shit everyday. but anyway, i’ll see ya later, handsome.”

your subtle compliment made aki’s body stiffen for a moment, and you were able to see his ears redden in real time as he exited your apartment.

the fond contentment that surrounded the sword-wielding hunter was snatched away from him the moment the door closed behind his heels, and the crisp, cold air embraced his figure.

denji and power immediately flooded his ears with questions, ones he didn’t care enough to answer. they were too personal for him. as far as he was concerned, they didn’t need to know what went on in his relationship. like second nature, his face returned to its naturally stoic state, and he pulled out a second cigarette and lit it as he walked away from the two devils, who were still pestering him with obscene inquiries.

in that instance, he once again left his beating heart in human form behind on the ninth story of the apartment complex.

one could assume this might have been why aki hayakawa was so frigid all the time. the warmth of your love, of your being in itself that set fire to the blood in his veins, was pulled away from his grasp, causing his skin to harden and freeze in solitude and indifference. it ultimately contributed to overall icy personality, which seemed to be more steely than usual. each time his thoughts pondered on your tasteful figure —even for a moment— or the memory of your honeyed voice kissed his mind’s ear, he would have to stifle of groan of longing and annoyance, because instead of being in your bed, cradling you in his strong grasp, he had to be out here instead: his suit stained with the blood of some repulsive devil creature, dealing with all these. . . people, he thought in vague disdain, and dreading the paperwork he’d have to fill out for makima.

the week seemed to have weights on its feet, with the way it dragged on day after day, ever so slowly. it was too slow for aki and work, as well as his eccentric roommates, were driving him up the wall.

aki’s skin grew too cold, it resembled too much like solid ice, where if you came to close in its vicinity, its frost would bite you. he had been without the warmth of his heart for too long.

this realization would soon lead the dark-haired male to sneak out of his own house in the dead of night, an unfathomable gravitational force deep within his being pulled him to the little slice of heaven in this hell he had to live in everyday: to you.

aki understood the impulsivity and recklessness of his actions and was well aware of the risks of walking around alone at night, knowing that there could be devils lurking literally anywhere. he didn’t care though; nothing else mattered when you were involved. he also knew that he really should be in bed, resting so he can be ready for another grueling day at his job tomorrow.

but he just couldn’t seem to drift off into a dreamless slumber that his body so desperately wanted. not when you lingered and danced in the forefront of his subconscious.

it was an ungodly hour, most likely past two a.m., and lucky for aki, you were awake to feel the buzz of your phone in your palms. your closed laptop laid idle on the desk next to your bed, feeling the crushing weight of an assignment you were dreading lifted off your shoulders as soon as you pressed the submit button. now, you were currently going through your ‘watch later’ compilation on youtube, slowly but surely making your way through the list.

that’s when you saw the notification from your boyfriend drop down from the top of the screen. reflexively, your heartbeat quickened, and your finger twitched as you read his rather straightforward text.

you up? if you are, come unlock the door for me

it’s a marvel how he seemed to know that you were awake at this hour. for all he knew, you could have been fast asleep, enjoying your ride to dreamland.

but you supposed that just proved how attuned your man was to you. it was frightening sometimes, like he knew you better than yourself.

and it would make sense for someone to be in tune with such an important organ more than anything else because of course, it was the one that gave them life and one wouldn’t be able to effectively survive without it.

aki’s began to drown in the sea of his own thoughts, he didn’t even realize that the door was already open, and you stood there waiting for him. your soft spoke snapped him out of the daze he was in. you couldn’t stop the faint, cheeky grin that pulled at your facial muscles the longer you stared at your lover.

if aki leaned close enough and looked hard enough, he might be able to see the hearts in your pupils. something about him coming here in the dead of night— randomly, no less — felt so adolescent. it felt like the two of you were some starstruck lovers in high school that couldn’t stay away from the other for too long. and something about the fact made your body temperature increase.

you noticed that aki’s hair wasn’t tied up in its usual top-knot style. it cascaded freely in dark waved across his face, acting as a shadowy curtain over his lashes. the onyx stud earring’s he always wore glimmered in the refraction of the singular light that hung over their heads in the hallway. his katana was slung lifelessly across his back on top of the black hoodie he wore.

aki’s face was mainly expressionless as he stared back at you, and yet, he still managed to look effortlessly beautiful.

you’d never know that thoughtful stare could prove to be too much for him sometimes. the man found himself quickly tearing his gaze from yours after a few seconds, deciding that your eggshell white painted toes and silver anklet were far more interesting. and they were, because they were so pretty looking. everything about you was so pretty.

he opened his mouth a little to say something, but then immediately closed it again, swallowing whatever thoughts he was going to share. concern briefly flickered in your brow at the minimal action. “aki? is.... everything okay?” you asked him carefully, knowing that he wasn’t the type to wear his heart on his sleeve or open about anything so easily.

he would need to warm up first to do that.

aki took several moments to reply, and in the silence, his feet took control of the rest of his body and took a step forward. then another, and then another, until he had your back up against the wall, just like the other night. your breath slightly hitched at the memory, your chests brushing against one another.

“. . . everything’s fine. those two just. . . can be so fucking loud sometimes, even when they’re sleeping. can’t stand it.” his voice was rough and full of complaints, but his hands were gentle, finding their way back home on the flesh of your waist, and used it as leverage to pull your hips against his. you could feel the heat of his crotch on yours/

“one of these days, i’m actually going to kill them in their sleep and dump their bodies on the street.” and there it was again, that dip in volume that made his voice sound more like a sensual rumble in this throat. you started to wonder if he was aware of it or not.

the flicker of his intensifying gaze from your eyes to your lips seemed to be the catalyst in the two of your moving your faces closer together. both of you were so close he could feel the air escaping from your mouth when you let out a chuckle. “so dramatic. so...you came all the way here, because they were snoring too loud?” your eyes were lidded now, teasing him with faux offense embedded in your tone as you wrapped your arms around his neck.

aki all but hummed, not caring enough to reply at the moment, because he now became too busy pressing a much-anticipated kiss on your lips. this time, it was saccharine. it was eager, bordering on desperate. but most of all, it was warm. aki sighed and groaned into your mouth, relishing in the warmth of being here with you, in your house, in your arms, thawing the cold barrier that surrounded his veins.

as the kiss grew more fervent ━ one of his hands gliding up the valley of your breast to comfortably latch onto your throat, and your hand that was clasp took root in his soft hair, giving it a little tug ━ neither he, nor you, could suppress the shudder that crawled up your spines.

the need to properly breath soon became too overwhelming, and soon enough the both of you pulled away from one other, panting softly into each other’s mouth, him resting his forehead on yours.

“yeah...” he spoke slowly, trying to remember the question before the two of you kissed; his head was still fuzzy from the sheer euphoria of it all. “they’re....too loud. anyway, let’s go to bed, baby. ‘m tired.”

with one final peck on your lips, he slipped out of your loose grasp and padded his way to your room, with you following after him. you plopped on your bed and got comfortable as you watched your boyfriend maneuver back and forth between your room and bathroom as if he lived here. it felt very...domestic and you had to bite back the grin that wanted to pull at your lips and contain your giddiness.

as you connected your phone to its charger and set it on the nightstand, aki’s taller frame climbed into bed next to you. his clothing was reduced to his boxers and t-shirt, presumably wearing it under the hoodie he arrived in. instinctively, your bodies were pulled towards each other underneath the blankets: your head against the crook of aki’s neck and one hand on his chest, while his lanky, muscled arm was draped across your back, his palms rubbing miscellaneous patterns along your sides and thigh.

“you mind if i smoke a little before we sleep?” he broke the silence that filled your bedroom, remembering to be courteous whenever he came over.

you hummed sleepily, not realizing your own exhaustion as soon as you snuggled up against your boyfriend. “mmm, g‘head, baby. just open the window when you do....don’t want the smell to linger.”

it was amusing to aki that while gave him permission to get up satisfy his smoker habit, you still you nuzzled yourself against him, holding him close like he was your own personal teddy bear. chuckling softly, he slithered out of your grasp and out of the comfort of your bed to grab the pack of smokes and his lighter that were in his hoodie pocket.

remembering that you kept an ashtray in one of the drawers━ just for him; his heart pounded at the thought━ he placed it on the nightstand, and like second nature, pulled a pale white cigarette from its container with his teeth. with a few flicks of his black lighter ━one, two, three ━ the orange flame he’d come to be very well acquainted with sprang out from its plastic cage and kissed the end of his cigarette. wispy, white tendrils of smoke escaped from the end of the cigarette and idly floated into the atmosphere. inhaling and exhaling, as if he were breathing regularly, aki rested his back against the headrest of the bed, and blew out the toxic fumes, letting excesses of smoke lazily dribble past his lips.

the man’s dark, cerulean eyes drowsily shifted from the blank ceiling to your now sleeping form next to him. he took comfort in the way your body gently rose and fell, and the way your facial muscles relaxed into complete bliss, not having a care in the world.

the veiny hand that wasn’t holding the cigarette came to gently stroke the apple of your cheeks, then shifted so he could stroke your soft lips with the pad of his thumb. even in your sleep, you sensed his touch and leaned into his rugged palm. his chest ached and stomach churned watching you do that and God you were just so cute. so pretty and so soft and all his. every time he saw you, he liked the sound of that more and more.

this moment, it was comparable to a husband and wife sharing a bed. the thought made his cheeks and neck burn, almost causing him to choke on the smoke he was inhaling. aki wished all his days could end like this. he wished every day could begin and end like this, until the end of time.

after a few more minutes, aki snuffed out the cigarette on the ash tray next to him, got up to brush his teeth and gargle mouthwash for a second time this evening, and climbed into bed with finality. pulling your figure into his once more. his now warm hand glided up and down the canvas of your spine, and both of your legs became entangled with each other.

this particular thing, his relationship with you, was very personal to aki hayakawa, indeed. he cherished it admittedly more than his own job and he wanted to show you, as well as tell you, how much you meant to him everyday for the rest of his life.

that’s probably why he placed one last tender kiss on your forehead before letting slumber take over, and against your skin he mumbled something that had been weighing heavy on his chest and his mind for longer than he realized.

“i... i love you, princess. sweet dreams.”

aki closed his eyes before he realized your own eye that had peeled open at his thick, sleepy voice, suppressing a dreamy smile at his love confession.

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#sailewhoremoon #sosa’s filez 💭#i hope yall noticed all the allusions to aki being cold / the reader 'warming him up' bc shes his heart in human form #and how that connects to his personality━#ahem anyway #aki 🖤#chainsaw man #csm fics #csm x reader #chainsaw man x black fem reader #csm x black reader #black fem reader #aki hayakawa x fem reader #thank GOD i got this fic out ive been wanting to publish this all week #fluff🥰#!mdni #do y’all think my writing is like…bad or not well rounded #idek it’s just a thought

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