#but anyhow thank you for your message anon

[stedefxckingbonnet]

hello hello! i don’t think i’ve seen anything like this yet, so may i request izzy x gn!reader who’s a bit insecure?

maybe they struggle with body image or something and izzy is basically like “how are they so blind??” but he struggles to express it because he’s never had to be so soft for anyone?

of course, ignore it if you’re not comfortable with it! :)

Hi, everyone!!

So, it's been a while. And I mean, a while. Longer than I wanted to step away from writing, and I never really wanted to step away from it in the first place but some stuff happened and yada yada. But I'm truly, truly hoping to be back and writing again to some capacity, I have truly missed writing for Izzy and for you all and I feel as though the world needs Izzy Hands content now more than ever! I truly do hope to be back.

I hope you don't mind that I put my own spin onto this, anon! You provided the lovely central plot and idea, and I simply provided an atmosphere and story to go with. Body image/insecurity is something I struggle with too, no matter how many times people tell me that I am beautiful, and I tried to channel that in this one. I am also not trying to send the message that other people's validation is what can make a person feel better about themself! I am more so trying to convey that the one(s) we love can often show us things about ourselves that we didn't know were there or didn't see before, and that they help us to love and appreciate these things about ourselves, and ourselves in general. You all who are reading this are so, so wonderful and beautiful and extraordinary even if you have a hard time believing it, and maybe your comfort character can help you to believe it a bit more in this little fic♡

Anyhow, please, request! Don't hesitate! My messages are also always open for anyone who needs anything but also just to say hi or talk about anything really. Thank you all for your everlasting support, patience, and kindness especially through my sort of absence ♡ Also, please, if I have used your gif or you know who created it, please credit yourself or them! I am not always good at figuring that sort of stuff out, but I want to give credit where credit is due. Have a wonderful day (or night), everyone!

Love,

Lavinia

What I See | Izzy Hands x Reader

Warnings: mentions of alcohol, slight swearing, struggles with body image and insecurity, very direct izzy (in a good, affectionate way but may be inaccurate ish? but i believe it isn't)

Word Count: 2525

"I just don't understand it!" the first mate angrily threw his hands up in the air. "I just don't understand why Bonnet is dragging us to one of those stupid...fancy people gatherings."

You couldn't help but laugh at such a sight, seeing Izzy Hands so distraught, though his usual cloud of anguish didn't seem to surround him. This was different, something you couldn't exactly place, but it was endearing nonetheless. "A ball, you mean?" your lips curled into a playful smile.

"I don't care what it's called," Izzy grumbled. "All I know is that I don't want to be there."

"It could be fun!" you suggested, your smile growing larger.

"Has Bonnet brainwashed you somehow?" Izzy rolled his eyes, but for just a moment, maybe, you could have sworn you saw a smile on the first mate's visage.

"If worse comes to worse, there'll be plenty of alcohol to drink," you laughed, softly squeezing Izzy's shoulder. Subtle touches like these between the two of you were second nature, almost instinctual, yet you were certain Izzy didn't make much of it and plainly saw them as something friendly. You almost sighed at such a thought.

And perhaps you had your own motives for wanting to drag Israel Hands along to such an event. Perhaps it gave you an excuse to hold him close to you without him suspecting a single thing, just that it was all custom meant to be followed in such a setting. You thought maybe, just maybe, it would be the opportune night to spend some more time with Izzy, just the two of you in the moonlight, dancing and chatting the night away, cheek to cheek...

"Fancy people alcohol," Izzy groaned in response, snapping you out of your daydream, to which luckily, he didn't notice you had slipped into in the first place.

"It's better than nothing," you rolled your eyes playfully. "Now, come on. Bonnet's got some fabrics for us to borrow, he says. I've come to fetch you," you now smiled teasingly.

"Oh, joy!" Izzy exclaimed sarcastically, yet he still followed your lead.

The only reason he was even remotely tolerating the night ahead was to be able to find himself closer to you, away from the chaos of The Revenge and all else it had to offer. Spending a night with you wouldn't be dreadful in the slightest for Izzy, and had you not been attending at all, he wouldn't even hesitate to let Ed and Stede go off to this awful event by themselves. But even Stede knew that your presence was enough to get Izzy to agree to such a thing, and really, what could be more convincing than you?

Before Izzy could comprehend it, your figure was wrapped in an ethereal ensemble. You studied yourself in the mirror, a frown naturally falling upon your face, though it quickly faltered as he came into view.

By the sea gods, you looked astonishing. Izzy already knew you would be the most bewitching of the ball, and that perhaps he would have to compete with other awful suitors of high society to even just get a moment alone with you. He almost became troubled at the thought, but your unmatched beauty was enough to distract him from such a notion. You had taken his breath away and this wasn't exactly a feeling he was used to, though it wasn't one that he disliked. No, not at all. In fact, he could get used to this, and he wanted to. Even though his own reflection stood right before him, he couldn't take his eyes off of you. He never could have fathomed until he met you that someone could be so breathtaking, so...alluring.

But all you were thinking about is how your clothing seemed to accentuate all of the wrong features, in your eyes.

'And the color—it washes me out, doesn't it?' you thought to yourself, almost fighting back tears.

Finally, Izzy spoke, though he immediately regret doing so. "Will you be comfortable?" He almost began to scold himself. 'That's all you have to say? This attractive person is standing right beside you and that's all you can manage to say?'

"Oh, yes. I've got plenty of moving room," you assured him, doing your best to step out of your own head for a moment. You even tried to shoot him a convincing smile. "I'll be just fine."

Finally, your eyes wandered over to his image, instead of focusing either at your own reflection or onto the ground. You felt your face becoming warm as you caught a glimpse of the man before you—how he was transformed, yet, still the Izzy Hands you knew and loved. Only elevated, and even more enchanting than usual. Your jaw almost dropped to the ground.

"What? I look fucking dumb, don't I?" Izzy laughed annoyedly.

"No! No, Izzy, you look..."

Before you could finish your statement, Stede rushed in. "You two ready to go? Oh, look at the two of you! You look divine!"

You looked over at Izzy, sending a supportive, yet spirited smile his way. Izzy couldn't help but return the sentiment as the two of you were ushered off of the ship and into another realm unbeknownst to the both of you.

⋆.ೃ࿔*:･

Some of the sweetest melodies you had ever heard began to surround you as you stepped into the ornately decorated room. You could hardly believe how much space there was in just one part of this residence, and that it was dedicated for dancing and other sorts of happenings similar to these. Before you knew it, for just a moment, you succumbed to your wonder of what having a life like this would entail, though you were quickly reminded of your distaste towards it when you saw a woman weeping and being chased out of the room by a man screaming extreme obscenities toward her. You and Izzy slowly looked toward one another in disbelief, the both of you fighting off laughter.

"It's not too late to get out of here," Izzy whispered.

You rolled your eyes with that same familiar grin this action always seemed to come with. "We're hardly even here."

Defeated, Izzy sighed and slumped against a wall, though quickly coming off it as soon as he spotted Stede glaring daggers at him from across the room. Another sigh escaped his lips, and you burst into a fit of laughter, unable to contain yourself. As annoyed as Izzy was at what just happened, your laughter was an antidote, and he was certainly taking it in.

Though, his newfound smile quickly faltered when he noticed a handsome stranger eyeing you from a few feet away. But you didn't even notice that someone else had noticed you—you only cared if the man in front of you had, and he seemed to be occupied by something else.

"Iz?" you asked in confusion. "What is it?"

Without another word, Izzy motioned his head to the side, to which you finally noticed the attention of another that you had captured.

"And?" you shook your head, unsure of what Izzy had been insinuating.

"He wants to dance with you," Izzy pointed out, rolling his eyes without realizing. "And you should have some fun. Don't let me hold you back."

You opened your mouth to speak in protest, but quickly closed it once again. How would you admit, in the midst of a stuffy room with a plethora of people you don't know who are all dancing and speaking at the top of their lungs, that all you had looked forward to this evening was to sharing a dance with Izzy Hands and no one else? That it was the only reason you even considered forcing yourself into an outfit that made you feel bad about yourself, even worse than you already do, and surrounding yourself with a million strangers whilst doing it? The thought alone sounded like a nightmare, but with Izzy by your side, it sounded like a dream come true. But Izzy was pushing you toward this stranger before you could comprehend it, and then you watched Izzy's figure disappear slowly into the distance as you were whisked away.

"I've never seen you here before," the stranger pointed out. "And if I had, I think I'd remember a beautiful person such as yourself."

These words made your insides twist. Your companion spoke with sincerity, but you couldn't bring yourself to believe it. 'He's just being polite,' you told yourself, brushing it off.

"It's been a few years," you lied, not wanting to blow your cover, or especially Stede's cover, as you were sure he wasn't exactly welcomed back into an environment such as this. "I don't usually speak to many."

"Well, isn't it my lucky day then?" he laughed. "No one here even compares to you. You are something special. What did you say your name was?"

But before the perhaps unlucky stranger knew it, you were nowhere to be found. You kept running until your environs became darker, and the moon was your only source of light. You leaned against the railing of a balcony, your vision blurred by tears. You flinched upon feeling a hand on your shoulder, but quickly relaxed once you noticed out of your periphery that it was none other than Izzy's touch.

"Did he offend you? I swear, I'll have his head before he can even fucking think of using it again—"

"No, no. He didn't. It's fine, really," you shrugged, blinking back tears to the best of your ability. But even the darkness of the night failed to hide your misery. Izzy softened upon noticing your state.

"What is it?" he asked, concern dripping from his voice as he looked at you intently. You stared at your hands gripping the railing, but you quickly tore your eyes away from that sight and stared out into the night.

"I—This is why I didn't want to come tonight!" you exclaimed.

"You—but you were so—"

"Excited? Yeah, right," you laughed sadly, shaking your head.

"What is it?" Izzy repeated, worry written all over his face. "Are you sure I don't need to behead anyone?"

Another laugh escaped you. "No, Izzy. He—he said I was beautiful. That's not a crime."

"He wasn't wrong," Izzy shrugged, a small smile making its way onto his face. With this, you couldn't help but meet Izzy's eyes, and you couldn't help but return a smile. Though quickly, it vanished, and your original demeanor overtook you once again.

"He was though," you protested. "This is why I don't like coming to these things. Squeezing myself into these clothes."

"I know these clothes are a bit ridiculous," Izzy laughed. "But yet you still manage to be so...beautiful."

Your heart began to do pirouettes inside your chest. For once in your life, part of you believed such a statement could be directed toward yourself. But Izzy could see the plagued expression on your face.

"You don't believe me?"

You shook your head as you finally allowed tears to fall down your face and drip onto your chest. Izzy frowned and took a few steps closer to you so as to gently wipe away your tears with his thumb, though his hand lingered for a moment longer, caressing your cheek as he was about to speak.

"You could be covered in dirt and I'd still find you beautiful," Izzy assured you. "You know, when I first saw you, I knew even then that you were. And you become more so every single day. You are the most enchanting person I've ever crossed paths with and laid my eyes upon. And there's so many things about the world I find are awful to have to experience and look at, but not you. You're the opposite of everything that's wrong with the world."

Sobs escaped your chest as you fell into Izzy's arms, to which he instinctively caught you, engulfing you carefully in his arms. He softly wrapped his fingers in your hair as he held you. 'I am holding the world in my arms right now,' he thought to himself, and thank the sea gods your face was buried into the crook of his neck and you couldn't see the grin that conquered his lips.

As for you, you never believed it when anyone else said these sorts of things to you. You found it impossible to believe these things about yourself; there were even days where you'd purposefully avoid any sort of reflective surface just to ensure that you don't break down. Sometimes, you couldn't even bear to look at yourself. But hearing Izzy declaring all of this to you—for the first time, perhaps you would actually be able to believe it.

Your silence made beads of sweat form atop Izzy's temple, but he didn't dare let you go to wipe them away. You clung onto him tighter, which only thawed Izzy's heart even more. He couldn't believe all that he just said, even though it was all true, and your lack of a response made his heart race even more.

"You are beautiful," Izzy repeated as he melted into your embrace, and embraced the shared silence. Something about it was comforting in a way he had never experienced before. If he could, he would exist in this moment forever.

Finally, you slowly pulled away, though your hands still clung onto the first mate's arms, and your faces were a short distance away from one another. At the same time, the two of you leaned in to close said distance between the two of you, and all bits of yearning, desire, love, and desperation poured out into this moment. Even without Izzy's words, he had already managed to make you feel lovely in every way even just by him being around. He was the one person who managed to help you see what was so amazing about yourself. You quickly melted into the sudden collision of your lips and he kissed you with a fervor that you had been craving from him for as long as you could remember. You smiled against his lips, and once air became scarce, the two of you simultaneously sought it. Once you both pulled apart for air, a collective joyous laugh filled both of your ears.

"I only wanted to come to this stupid thing because you'd be here," you admitted, and you were sure your cheeks were as red as the roses in the garden that surrounded you.

Izzy couldn't help but smile. "I wasn't going to come until Bonnet mentioned you would be. I meant what I said, you know. You are beautiful, and I'm sorry, but you're fucking dumb if you don't see that."

You threw your head back as you laughed before meeting Izzy's gaze once again. "You are so beautiful," Izzy repeated once again, all teasing aside to show his sincerity. You reached for his hand and squeezed it tenderly as the two of you looked out into nighttime, but all Izzy could focus on was how even more ravishing you looked as the moon illuminated your face.

[primofate]

So anon thinks they can say whatever they want because they've never criticized your works? Hahaha what

She/He also thinks that I'm gunna miss his/her one follow 🤷‍♀️

Ladies and gentlemen just a word of advice. Talk, discuss with and educate others before you think the worst of them.

Anyhow... I'm not gunna respond to negative messages anymore. I'll chat with others about the Natlan issue and see what my opinion on it is (because it hasn't even been formed, really)

I apologize for being snappy, but I think you understand.

Also, thanks to the other messages that are being encouraging AND educational about the issue. I really appreciated that other message I posted, the one who said he/she is conflicted. You don't have to support fanwork if you don't think it feels right. That is totally fine. I would offer you a free copy of my next book if I knew who you were and for giving a well typed response.

To everyone else, I'll be lurking, and thanks for the love. Some of your points are very valid and some I don't really agree with, but that's fine because you were RESPECTFUL about it.

Much love,

Primofate

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

Hey sex witch so I was the anon a while back who messaged you about my shitty gyn who when I asked for an eval told me everyone has endometriosis and that my uterus was just traumatized into thinking it was supposed to hurt somehow????? And that I should just take Tylenol about it????

Anyhow wanted to send a Positive Update- I got into an endometriosis clinic and the doctor was so amazing. He listened to everything I had to say and even scolded me a little for downplaying my pain(I tried to call passing out an 8 and he was like “your body literally shut down that is a 10”). He gave me a “hugely confident” diagnosis just from my symptom breakdown and presented treatment options immediately and has me scheduled for imaging to see if any severe damage has occurred

I just wanted to come and say thank you for your kind words and encouragement before, they really helped me feel confident enough to pursue the help I needed. 💞

oh this is huge!!

I remember you so vividly; as soon as you described that anon I was exactly as angry at your old gynecologist as I was the first time I read that.

it's so, SO wonderful to hear you've had such a spectacular turnaround in your healthcare and found a doctor who not only takes you seriously, but even encourages you not to downplay your own experiences! I really really appreciate you coming back to share this, both for my peace of mind and for any others who are reading this who worry that they'll never get a diagnosis or receive the care they need. good luck with your imaging 💜

[desertfangs]

Ohhh I love your “obscure” headcanons so much! Armand is definitely the pettiest, bitchiest drama queen who ever lived (and I love him for it) and while I don’t think he’s outright lying in the sense that… while there’s obviously some discrepancies re: what he says and what actually happened, he also believes his own version of reality and he uses it as a coping mechanism (unlike some other vamps in the series who are just good old fashioned liars lol). To him, those aren’t really lies, but what he’s told himself to believe in order to move forward and survive. Also! Daniel 100% tells him he loves him while he’s a mortal, IIRC it’s mentioned how they fight and make up a lot and always reconcile with kisses and blood exchanges, and Daniel says “I love you, give me more”, or something along those lines. TVA!Armand really tried it but we remember 😌

Oh thank you, LOL. Yes, he is petty AF. But I totally agree, I think you're spot on about Armand and how in that moment, that is his version of reality. He isn't lying in an intentional sense about the Daniel stuff. He's in such a terrible headspace, he feels abandoned and lost, he just tried to commit suicide, and his mental state is not good (understatement of the year). So when he says things like "no one alive ever said they loved me" or "we never got our springtime" or whatever, these are things that absolutely feel true to him. He's so absorbed in his own pain and sadness, he can't really recall the good.

I do think there's part of him that is lashing out and wants to hurt Daniel on some level, but yes, largely it's just... he's so hurt himself that he cannot think of their relationship as anything but a total failure. He's seeing it through the lens of 'He left me, he doesn't love me, it's all bad.' 😭 He may remember Daniel saying he loves him but in that moment, those words no longer feel true so he might as well not have said it at all, you know? (Okay, now I'm depressed.)

Of course, we know he did. Like you said, he does actually say it in QotD: "It would end with the embrace, the kiss, the blood stinging him, the shroud of dreams closing over him like a great net, hunger! I love you! Give me more!"

But also even if it wasn't directly stated, Devil's Minion is like 40 pages that covers 12 years of their life together! Twelve years! That's a hell of a long time. We get bits and pieces of their conversations, mere snippets and little anecdotes. There's a lot that isn't included.

I have no doubt Daniel told him he loved him, verbally and otherwise, literally hundreds of times. Probably thousands. I would bet cash money Daniel has several of those times recorded on home video, even. I can only imagine Daniel reading that line and going "You've got to be kidding me." (The most mild reaction he will have to anything in TVA, tbh.)

Anyhow, thank you for the message, anon!

[bimboothefool]

Hello! Firstly, I'd like to give thanks for getting me back into FNF. A good friend shared that wip Yourself/Silly Billy x reader comic you're working over Discord, and it intrigued me enough to look into it. Not only did I end up returning to the FNF fandom but also got a very big brainrot on Yourself/Silly Billy. Thanks for that.

Also speaking of that wip comic, I absolutely LOVE how it's coming along so far!

That first page is just so sweet, and honestly even more so now that I know more about Yourself there. Poor guy is clearly so happy and relieved to be reunited with a loved one there, even though said loved one (in this case Reader) isn't the same version he knows.

Then freaking Boyfriend calls out and that bit we get to see of Yourself's reaction regarding that- I couldn't help but let out a little laugh. It feels almost like he got caught up in the moment there and only just came back to reality there when BF called out there.

Speaking of BF, it's a good thing he showed up when he did. Not that I'm worried about what would happen to Reader with Yourself there, but man I can't help but feel he saved Reader from a more shocking reveal there. Better that it happens right now than later on am I right lmao.

And speaking of the reveal there, I LOOOOVE how you have done the reveal with Yourself on the second page. Poor Reader just very fearfully glancing down to the BF in their arms and god- I love that panel with Yourself there but god damn does it give me the chills. Like, in a good way here if that makes any sense.

THAT BIT YOU SHARED ON THE THIRD PAGE THO ASJKASJK GOD I ABSOLUTELY ADORE IT SO MUCH. It's just a small thing, yes, but that panel with Yourself holding Reader there- god it makes me feel so many emotions there. The fact that he's an alternate Boyfriend? God. I just feel myself getting a little misty-eyed here.

I do feel a little bad for Reader though. While we know that Yourself has no malice intentions for them and simply just want to be with them again, Reader DOESN'T know that. As far as Reader is aware, they encountered what appears to be some sort of doppelganger of Boyfriend, and for whatever reason he seems to be really interested in them.

Can't wait to see their reaction when they learn who Yourself is there. Hopefully it'll involve giving the poor guy some much comfort there cuz seriously he has been through a lot. 😭

Anyhow, this is getting long enough as it is so I shall end this with another thank you and wishing you luck on the rest of that comic and your other works! Also hope we'll be seeing more Yourself/Silly Billy x Reader and Boyfriend x Reader content in the future too! :D

You’re welcome I’m happy you’re back into the fnf fandom and have brainrot because of my silly comic wip!!

Awww thanks Anon, I’m really happy you like the comic so far!! I’m reworking the comic’s ending, given originally there was gonna be a Boyfriend & Yourself/Silly Billy Ending (separate). But after really thinking about it, I thought a single ending is better and overall I think you and anyone reading the comic deserve a better ending!

Your analysis is really interesting and it was such a joy to read!! As of now I’m reworking some bits and pieces of the comic so that the new ending can feel seamless. I won’t spoil the comic ending as that would be well spoilers. lololol

You’re welcome Anon and thank you so so so much for the message!! :D It was very heartwarming to read and yes I’m hoping I can deliver some more Boyfriend x Reader & Yourself/Silly Billy x Reader content!! People like you are such a good driving force and help me move forward with making my content!! Much love and hope you’re having an amazing day!!🩷💕

[loveydoveylex]

Saw all the hate you suddenly received. Many already have your back, but here's a nicer anon message:

Those people are probably just trolls. They put themselves beneath you the way they act. And as if they know anything about your personal relationships with anyone? It's like Twitter giving "their consent" to somebody else's relationship. It's stupid entitlement. Anyhow, you're better than those trying to harass you. You do you, Lex. Stay the way you are, cuz you're wholesome 🫶

your words mean a lot anon, thank you so much 🫶 they are most definitely just trolls - I honestly am not even sure why I've started responding to them again, because that goes against my own very strict sentiment to Not Feed The Damn Troll, hah. it's counterproductive. xD

hope you're having a lovely day, thank you for checking up on me! ❤️

[desceros]

Hello, Ms. Desceros! I'm so sorry to hear about the whole situation, I wasn't aware of it before seeing your post! I hope you're doing well!! I came here to say that I am indeed not a minor, though I probably am younger than you are by a few years!

I also hope you're taking time to rest and to take care of yourself! I still remember when you were complaining about wrist pains at the beginning of the year, I wish I had sent a get well soon message, but I was much too shy at the time! :'D

Anyhow, I came here to clarify the age subject, but ended up rambling a bit, haha! I love reading your posts, your writing and interacting with you and your art! Hope you're having a great day/night!

–Former 🪻 anon! :]

Ps– Would you like to see the Donnie inspired tattoo I have? It's not exactly identical to the one in Amaranthine, but it was your story that gave me the push I needed to get it done! (I had wanted to do it for a long time, but had no guts– lmaao 😭)

thank you very much!!! i've been getting little twinges here and there, but largely i haven't had the same issues with it since i've slowed down my roll on writing and whatnot. it's kind of frustrating because i have So Much i want to write and i know i'm capable of churning things out much faster, but this is better in the long run, i know. heavy sigh.

i would LOVE to see a picture of your tattoo!!!! grabby hands gimme gimme

[samesanegirl]

Hi same sane girl! Huge fan of yer blog here, and rose Weasley fan also. Seen lotsa scorpius rose bashing and ridiculous rose bashing. Don’t have a blog, but you’ve said everything I’ve wanted to say :) So anyhow have you written any scorpius rose fanfics?. Also, have you ever tried procreate for your fan art? Thx! - Sincerely, anon.

Hi there. thank you for the kind message.

I am honestly sick and tired of the Scorose hate. Mostly because Scorose haters believe we ship them based on the Cursed Child when the Scorose fandom existed well before that. I never considered Cursed Child canon so I will keep shipping Scorose in my own terms.

In terms of writing fanfic, yes, I have quite a lot of ideas. I actually have started a fanfic which focuses on them from 5th to 7th year. However, I am worried about the execution and I don't know whether enough people will actually read it. But hopefully I can publish a few chapters in the very near future.

And no. I loved doing Rose Weasley art but it hasn't gotten a lot of attention. My blog is more well known for my writing and opinion pieces than my art. So I will stop doing that until I get inspiration again or if it gets more attention here.

Thank you again. Chat to me anytime please

[keichanz]

Hi Keiz! I miss your posts so much and your fics❤️ I hope the job interview went well! Loyally waiting for your updates both in life and in fics🥰🥹

heeyyyoo. thanks for checking in with me precious anon~ right now i am eepy because keiz slept like ass and she is running on coffee and a prayer.

imma be honest, i dont even know what job interview it was because i've had so many lol but i can say this. the latest one i had went pretty well and i'm hoping to hear back from them this coming monday. fingers crossed y'all ❤️

anyhow. haven't felt motivated lately to write because i've just been so goddamn stressed. between job searching, my dad being in and out of the hospital because of some health issues, and my kitchen still being under renovation - among a few other smaller things - it's a wonder i can even function properly. you can thank the coffee i'm drinking rn that i'm even coherent right now lmao

sooo yeah it's been tough but i'm truckin', ya know. my bf helps a lot. he's pretty damn amazing and i'm lucky to have him. i got my friends too and my precious babies. although romeo is gonna give me a freakin' ulcer with how much freaking anxiety he gives me. right now he's showing signs of having another hairball and after what happened the last time lemme tell you mama is an anxious mess. i never wanna go through that again. i swear i have fuckin ptsd from it.

i'm hoping he'll just pass it sometime today and he'll feel better. my poor baby. i just wish i could do something for him.

thanks again dear for sending this and reminding me i'm still thought of and loved ❤️ it truly does mean a lot, especially since i'm on the struggle bus and the route has no end in sight. i'll do my best to come back and give ya'll periodic updates, but you're always welcome to shoot me a little message like this and inquire about anything.

love y'all. ❤️

[journen]

it’s so amazing that you share your art and you talent with us. It’s been incredible getting to see the range of artwork you’ve created over the years and if anyone can’t recognize what a privilege it is that we get to engage and interact with such an amazing talented person here, free of charge, then that’s on them. You’re doing amazing and we love you.

Aww thank you my friend. Really! You are way too nice fuck off LMAO!!! 🥺

It's like, hard to take the "ask" that anon sent seriously or personally , just because like what even is their point lol, but you saying that means a lot to hear. I'm happy you and maybe some others like my art, it's been fun creating it! And idek why that anon is interacting here if they don't like it...there's no pressure to lol.

Anyhow thank you again my friend. It means a lot!! Grateful for you LOL!! Your message made me feel a lot better. 🧡🫶

[dark-full-moon-system]

hey are u alright w like advice anonss? im just wondering if u have any input. do u know what it cld look like if a “singlet” is multifaceted as one is and gives names/identity to their moods/genders/differences in their personality vs having alters? do u think it’s possible someone cld make that kind of mistake. can singlets feel like sometimes they feel like a different name, gender, pronouns, appearance, and personality? and then the next day it feels wrong and they switch names? how do u know it isn’t just being a regular multidimensional person? speaking as someone who often knows I have a cdd but goes into doubts. is there any good way to accept if they are alters or just. regular feelings? what is the extent singlets can even experience. like what if in just giving names to moods and over analyzing being a multifaceted person?

Hi, thank you for asking, my Star🌟

We're more than alright to answer those kinds of asks and we will do our best to answer them

Disclaimer, we're not professionals, those are our thoughts, opinions and experience.

So, about the ask

We think it's very much possible for a person to make this mistake, especially when they know little about dissociative disorders (or pretend to be a system (other origin than traumagenic))

Due to personality and identity development it's normal for you to change how you perceive yourself.

I believe 'singlets' can give names to their moods yet I don't believe it can be anyhow mistaken for a dissociative disorder.

Let's start with the trauma you had to experience to get dissociative disorder of any kind. If you remember your trauma and feel like different people, cool, might consider cdd. Don't remember trauma, but feel like different people, nice, look into cdd but don't grab everything you read as your indication. Cdd is a spectrum, not everything is about you, or maybe you are special and they haven't found out about you and your experience. Remember trauma but don't feel like different people, nice, consider (C)PTSD or OSDD. Talk to someone, I mean professional, about your doubts, they might help.

The difference between alters and 'named moods' is the trauma, that's for sure. Also, you don't choose the alter you split, you just split. And with those moods, you name them, at least that's how I understood the ask. You have no control over the alters. Another thing, the alters can front when they are needed but also when they feel like it. The moods are moods, they are when they are. When you're happy you're happy, when you're sad you're sad. The alters have boundaries, they can change, they have relationships. Do moods we're talking about have those too?

There are more to the alters and cdd. As I said, dissociative disorders are spectrum but I really recommend looking into the basic criteria and talking to people who have the disorder. Listening to first hand experiences is so helpful to understand the disorder.

Our DMs are open, so you can message us and ask any question you have. Or we can stay with the anon asks😊

I hope we made the answer quite clear to read, there were so many thoughts and so little ability to put them all in there that if something is not understandable, please let us know. If you want more information, also let us know.

[stedefxckingbonnet]

So this is gonna be entirely too much info but like. I've fallen into reading your reader x Izzy fics and I LOVE them! I've been going through a hard time with it getting to Christmas and having no family, and the Izzy fics just make me feel lighter. So mostly just thank you thank you thank you!

Now the cheeky bit - is there any way we could get a Male reader x Izzy with a pride and prejudice element. My friend said something about Con O'Neil as Mr Darcy and I damn near swooned. Either like a Colin Firth wet white shirt scene or like anything like the Matthew Macfayden Darcy (The hands! The sopping wet pathetic man!)

If not, that's more than okay! I still love your work so much! And again, thank you so much for it!

Hi, anon! First of all, I completely understand how rough the holidays can be, especially without family around. My heart is truly with you during these times and I hope you can still find joy, peace, and love this winter. If you ever need anything, I am always in your corner. I know I'm just a random writer on Tumblr but I truly do care for you, each and every one of you, for that matter! I'm happy I could even bring you a sliver of joy with my work. Thank you endlessly for reading, and I am sending an abundance of my love your way <3 feel free to message me if you'd like, I'd love to be your friend! My messages are always open, everyone! But if not, that's okay too. I'm just happy to share this with you!

Anyhow, I absolutely lit up at this request—I love Pride & Prejudice! OFMD and P&P intertwining is honestly heavenly, I got so excited to write this that I put a pin on another x reader I was writing (never fear! You will all get this one by the end of the week if finals don't absolutely drain me!). This one is reminiscent of Pride & Prejudice and the vibes it emits, but more so, my own spin on it, as well as twists and turns. Like, Izzy honestly exhibits more of a Lizzie in this one but it's also very clear his actions parallel Darcy. I really, truly hope you enjoy this nonetheless!

Lastly, speaking of the holidays, I'm thinking of writing some holiday headcanons for Izzy or a few x readers regarding the holidays with Izzy! So stay tuned for that! Thank you everyone for your everlasting kind words, understanding, patience, and encouragement with my slight delay with writing in the past week.

My Gem | Izzy x Male Reader

Warnings: slight angst, some strong language, slight enemies to lovers, not so in depth research of 1700's aristocracy (even though I'm a damn dramaturg, but we'll look past that for now), made up my first non-canon canon character because just referring to her as "she" felt inhumane, brief mentions of fake suicide note, kissing

Word count: 2324

Thoughts of the first mate of The Revenge were absolutely consuming you. Devouring you alive, plaguing you—you truly couldn't get him out of your head no matter how hard you tried. Oh, yes, you tried. But there was no use. Daydreams would always swirl in your mind and they would only increase tenfold throughout the course of your days.

You were grateful that you at least didn't have to carry the burden of breathing the same air as Israel Hands anymore. You would even collapse being within ten feet of him, let alone seeing him every single day. Your chest ached even at the mere thought of the man.

To say you were confused by his last actions toward you was an understatement. Confused, embarrassed, miserable, even flattered...You couldn't get Izzy Hands out of your head. You couldn't get his hands out of your head...

⋆.ೃ࿔*:･

"So you really are doing this, then."

"Yes," you nodded. "I am. I don't belong here—"

"You are a damn great pirate," Izzy almost seethed. "I'll be damned if I believe you really want to go back to that...lavish lifestyle."

You looked slightly frantically behind you in hopes that no one heard Izzy's dig at what was about to be your life again. You hesitantly looked back at Izzy, almost biting your lip in disbelief. "I just need to do this."

"Really? That's all you have to say?"

"What—what else am I supposed to say?"

Silence loomed between the two of you. He nervously fidgeted with the coat that Stede had lent him to disguise himself as an aristocrat. He couldn't wait to toss it back into Bonnet's arms, but he needed this in order to see you off safely, without any suspicions of what you had been up to in your absence from the life you were born into. He knew full well that you were making a mistake, but that you couldn't be convinced of this. His chest ached upon realizing that you wouldn't change your mind, that he wouldn't be able to change your mind.

"Goodbye, Israel."

Instead of responding, Izzy carefully intertwined his fingers with yours as you were about to step up into the carriage. You froze, yet began to melt into his touch, his warmth. You finally met his eyes just as he let go of you, and before you knew it, you were riding off into the distance, Izzy becoming a small speck fading from your sight. Before he began to fade out of view, you caught a glimpse of him flexing his hand by his side as he watched you depart.

⋆.ೃ࿔*:･

You scoffed as the yellow carnation was pinned to your coat.

"Is something wrong, sir?" one of your dressers inquired, concern washing over his expression.

You almost laughed at such a question, thinking back to all of the late nights you spent studying flowers and their meanings, dying to tell him how this marriage was going to be doomed if you had to wear a yellow carnation. At the last minute, you decided against it, holding your tongue. "Everything is perfect. Thank you."

He nodded, exiting the room as soon as he finished dressing you. You turned toward the mirror, a frown falling onto your lips upon seeing your reflection. You had never dreaded a coming day like you dreaded tomorrow. Before you could internally lament further, a rhythmic knock was heard from your door. Genevieve—future wife. How delightful. It's not like you dreaded it every time she walked into a room, let alone walked over to your side, and it's not like you could tell she dreaded you all the same.

"Yes. Come in," you sighed, plopping down onto your bed. Only, it wouldn't be your bed anymore—you would share it with her, come tomorrow. Your solitude would be interrupted and put on pause forever.

Genevieve quickly rushed in, making sure to shut and lock the door behind her. She fixed her hair a bit as she did so.

"What is it that you want?" you demanded softly, your brows furrowing.

"Hello to you too," she rolled her eyes. "I'm not looking forward to tomorrow—"

"That makes two of us, Genevieve! Finally, something we can agree upon," you laughed, falling backwards onto the bed.

"Will you let me finish?" she crossed her arms without realizing it. Once she had in fact realized, an expression of guilt overcame her as she untwisted herself. A guilt you had never once seen her bear. You sent an apologetic look her way. "I'm not looking forward to tomorrow, nor the rest of our lives together, but I just wanted to say that you are lovely. I don't hate you. I just hate this."

"I don't hate you either," you sat up carefully, your head sort of spinning as you did so. "Far from it. This is just an...unfortunate situation we've found ourselves in."

"Yes," she agreed, carefully placing herself beside you on the edge of the bed. "You know, I would love you, if you were...there's no way to dance around this. I would love you if you were not a man."

"Oh!" you realized, looking over at her, relief crashing over you. "And I would probably love you if you were not a woman, quite honestly."

Genevieve gasped in delight, wrapping her arms around you as she laughed happily. You couldn't help but smile upon her embrace.

"Who is the lucky woman?" you playfully smiled, nudging her shoulder. You watched intently as you watched the pigment of her face turn rosy.

"Well...we've known each other since we were babies," she sighed happily. "But our families have been dear friends since before we were even conceived. It would never work out."

"Take "never" out of your vocabulary this instant!" you exclaimed, shooting up off the bed and onto your two feet.

"What are you planning?" Genevieve tilted her head.

You rushed over to your desk, filing through all that had piled atop it until you found a quill, some ink, and some parchment.

"We can't say you've run away—no, that would give hope that you're still alive and then you would be seeing wanted posters with your face plastered across trees anywhere you go," you sighed. "No. We'll fake your death instead. And you'll run away tonight."

Genevieve bit her lip concernedly. "Are you sure this will work?"

"I'm certain," you assured her. "Are you able to communicate this plan to your love before midnight?"

"Yes, she is coming to the rehearsal dinner tonight and I'm sure we'll sneak off to the gardens," she nodded.

"Wait—is that why you and Alice go there every time—"

Genevieve's hands flew up to her face, covering it as she giggled.

"My goodness!" you couldn't help but share the laughter. "Wow. I am not surprised, honestly."

"What about you?"

"Have I ever snuck off to a garden to—"

"No!" Genevieve rolled her eyes playfully. "Do you love another?"

"I..." you sighed. "Well, it's complicated."

"I've got time."

"I'm kind of upset with him at the moment. And I'm not sure how he feels about me. And I didn't realize I love him until after I left—"

"One thing at a time!" Genevieve tilted her head back to laugh. She place a hand on your shoulder. "Why does he have you upset?

"He held my hand before I left." you admitted, staring out the window as you spoke. Most days, you would have the curtains closed in order to mask the view of the ocean, as it would only bring you feelings of sorrow and regret.

"And you really question how he feels for you?!"

"Well, he's not like us," you frowned. "Believe me, I'm glad he's not. Though I just don't think he understands what a touch of the hand means to someone like me."

"You may come from different worlds with different values and rules, but holding hands is still an expression of affection wherever you come from," Genevieve pointed out.

"He did wear a fancy ensemble just to see me off safely..."

Once again, Genevieve's laughter filled the room. "You are blind!"

"It's just hard to tell with him!" you protested, laughing along with her. "He's hard to read. He's...very easily irritated."

"Is he like that when he's with you?"

"Less so, but yes," you shrugged. "He is a complicated man."

"But his feelings for you are apparent."

"My god, I need to go!"

"Yes, you do!" she encouraged you, patting you on the back.

"I can't right away. I have to get in contact with someone first, and if both you and I are found missing or dead by morning, it's going to be terribly suspicious—"

"You will find a way. I know it," she assured you. "Let's go and oversee the menu for tonight. I'm starved."

You laughed as she jokingly linked arms with you, leading you out into what you were about to leave behind once again.

⋆.ೃ࿔*:･

All had gone according to plan—you saw Genevieve and Alice off safely, and falsely mourned your fiancée the next day, and for only a few days after before Stede caught wind of your message. As soon as he had, you scurried to the beach, only bothering to bring a few possessions with you. You hadn't even bothered to leave a note—nothing attached you to the aristocratic life anymore. For good this time.

"Captain!" you exclaimed, almost out of breath. "Thank you. I'm so, so sorry."

"No need to apologize to me," Stede assured you warmly. "Believe me, I get it."

"I wish you warned me—"

"Oh, you wouldn't have listened," he teased. "I do regret having done the same thing you had, but if I hadn't, I never would have gotten closure with Mary and bade farewell to that side of me fully. You had to do the same."

"And you and Blackbeard—he forgave you?"

"We're working on it," Stede laughed. "He has, mostly."

"Do you think Izzy will ever forgive me? How is he?"

"Go see for yourself," Stede suggested kindly. "He's on watch tonight. I'll be in my quarters should you need anything at all."

Before you could thank him again, he vanished into the darkness. You smiled, though you could have swore your heart stopped upon the sight of Izzy Hands. You almost choked on the breath you had taken before gaining the courage to waltz over to him. Before you knew it, you were beside him once again. Izzy jumped upon sensing your presence.

"Jesus fuck," Izzy mumbled.

"Hello to you too."

"What the fuck are you doing here?"

"Oh, Izzy, I'm happy to see you too!"

"I'm serious—what the fuck? You just up and leave and then you're back. Is this some sort of pattern? How long will your stay be this time, perhaps only a day, maybe two—"

Without much thought, you found your fingers laced between his once again. Izzy's train of thought stopped in its tracks and all he could focus on now was the feeling of warmth that had been yanked away from him ever since you left, and that now, it had been restored. A warmth he thought he would never get to experience again, nor experience at all. Whenever he spent countless days and hours reminiscing upon it, he scolded himself, convincing himself that he should be grateful he got to feel that at least once in his life. It was one more time than he ever expected he would feel it. It should have been enough, but it wasn't even close. His heart began beating out of his chest—what was this feeling he couldn't quite place? He knew it all too well and he was tired of pushing it down to drown. Eventually, you softly removed your hand, and you noticed Izzy's hand flex by his side once again.

"Did it mean something to you? When you held my hand before I left."

"I was giving you a boost onto your ride," he shrugged it off, turning away in hopes that the darkness would hide his smile.

"Right," you laughed. "Izzy, seriously. I have been going crazy. Every single day, wondering if you ever understood what such a gesture meant to me or if it meant absolutely nothing to you."

"Of course it meant something to me, dammit," Izzy sighed. "You are such a fool if you thought for a second that it didn't."

You laughed breathlessly, relief overcoming you instantly as you pressed your forehead against his. The way the moonlight shone upon his face made him even more breathtaking, even more earth-shatteringly beautiful. You couldn't believe what your eyes were allowing you to see, and you couldn't believe how warm you'd felt. You almost swore you'd never shiver once again. Your lips softly grazed his forehead before you pressed another kiss upon his cheek, before resting your forehead against his once again, your eyes fluttering shut, butterflies flying around in your stomach as you reached for his hands once again.

"Mark my words. I will never, ever leave again—"

"Shh," Izzy gently whispered against your lips. "We can talk about it later."

"Later," you nodded gently as finally, your lips collided. Your heart did pirouettes as your lips danced against one another's. In the darkness of your vision, you caught a glimpse of your future aboard The Revenge, with Izzy. You had never seen so clearly, until now, that you had finally found the place you were meant to be after denying it for so long. You had found your family and your lover, and they were all gathered in the same place. This was a luxury that would always beat the fancy balls you attended, the gold-laced coats you wore upon your back, the gems you were gifted often. Izzy was your gem, and he made your life shine brighter than it ever had.

[starflungwaddledee]

sorry for being late, but happy birthday starflung!

here's a drawing of mine as a treat : https://docs.google.com/document/d/1PKgVT28HvP18_zLeg2WrrZCDO2ffolJNq-cTn7dbLtA/edit?usp=drivesdk

(only a doc bc i can't use images in anon asks and if i turn off anon my ask goes missing so..)

also it's fine to show the image outside of the doc!

oh my goodness!! thank you so much!! i apparently need to fix this setting, it seems some folks can send in pictures and others can't; i'm sorry for the hassle! but thank you so much for going to such great lengths to get this to me!

and also that your ask goes missing if it isn't anon!? that sounds strange but i have definitely gotten 'false' pings for inbox messages before! websites work in very mysterious ways sometimes...

anyhow, this picture isn't signed, and neither is the anon message, so i'm not sure... who sent this in...

but it's beautiful, thank you!!!

i love how you can JUST see her bow and her christmas antlers poking over the top of this amazing cake!! and so many fireworks! distilled her to the bare basics of both her (and my) motifs; incredibly accurate!!! 😂

this is such a beautifully thematic piece, i adore the colouring and the atmosphere!! pink and purple!! yes! Yes!!! and the detail of her constellations showing up over the cake even though she's behind it; they do tend to hover over things in front of her so i think that is very intuitive!!

[kuromi-hoemie]

I saw your post about wanting to torture someone with tickles. Hope I'm not stepping over the line to say hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii about it

you're not but i was talking about irl 🫡

also bc i don't really talk about it ig, the secret to whether I'm receptive/flirty/etc with you (generally, not you specifically, this is a turn and talk at the audience moment) is i will leave you little earnest love notes in the tags of your selfies when i reblog them.

don't post face? ❌ not interested

do but i never interact? ❌ not interested

like... a girl just likes to be open about what she's thinking and i love giving compliments just bc and do it all the time both on and offline, so there's def not any expectations w my tags, but they can also be taken as a tiny bow of courtship u can choose to act on or not 🙇🏾‍♀️

i know other ppl are very into anons or just hitting it off with anybody or whatever but i think that like. For Me, the ideal interaction is we both rb each other with some nice tags - showing and reciprocating in a very non-committal/no expectations kinda way, and after seeing that it's mutual then sure go for it 👍🏾

i love sharing audio sometimes and tbh might start moving nudes/lewds back to more private channels bc i forgot How Many People you have to block after posting them lmaoo.

🫵🏾 but i do appreciate tags being left for me and tbh sometimes i miss that accounts that usually post their body also Do share their face and they're very hot and i feel very silly for missing it ಠ⁠ᴥ⁠ಠ ♡⁠ hi oomfies sorry for being late to the party but it's good to be here.

anyways. i like this more subtle/non-committal kind of acknowledgement first, bc if i get asks or DMs i either have to ignore it or tell people I'm not attracted to them which is always really awkward 😶‍🌫️ especially for people I've never even talked to before, or people who take the tiniest bit of very simple acknowledgement and flood my DMs over everything.

which again, compliments are fine, but like.. a Talk To Me mindset bundled with it is imposing u guys 👉🏾👈🏾 just bc someone is cute doesn't mean they have to talk to u, just bc they say thank u to an unsolicited DM doesn't mean they want u to send a dozen more. without even getting a response to any of them too.... 🥸

I'm just kinda here to have fun and i like sharing myself and my thoughts to different degrees but none of it is rly an open invitation or a request. just keep it in the tags pls. tags r what usually pique my interest anyhow!! i like people who got something to say 🙇🏾‍♀️

i want to reemphasize this is a very general message and not at u specifically, there r other asks in my inbox and other persistent ppl who have been blocked over spamming my DMs, and this feels too nuanced and specific to add to my already long and kind of annoyed sounding (bc it is 💀) pinned. so yeah!!!!! i did get a lot of new followers recently so it's a good time for a periodic reminder

[desertfangs]

Procrastinating cleaning is clearly good if fics like that are the result!!! : ) Love your D/M piece with the handcuffs -- so cute!!

ANON!! Thank you so much, you're too kind! Sometimes procrastination is the best motivation for writing. 😂

It was just a little ficlet but I figured I might as well expand on that little post. Daniel/Marius are so fun together, they just have a really solid relationship and I love them being playful and joking around even while they're being intimate.

Anyhow, thank you so much for your kind message, it means a lot! I'm giving you a plate of peach cobbler with ice cream and a fistbump.

[shalom-iamcominghome]

Hey! I'm the anon who asked you about fear of reaching out to your local synagogue and confronting the reality of the conversion process. First of all, I want to thank you for your answer and the other person in your inbox for their message. They truly warmed my heart. Now I wrote this to wish you a happy Chanukah. If you dont mind sharing, how is it going for you? is it your first one? Can you light the candles yet? Are you cooking latkes? Anyhow, have a good week!

Thank you so much for getting back, I'm so happy! It's amazing to have talked with you and with the other anon, as well <3

And thank you for the well-wishes. I'm not "actually" celebrating this year because I am studying by myself and don't think I'm ready nor would I think it appropriate. But chanukah is still such a nice time, it truly embodies the saying of am yisrael chai <3