#but also thinks that everyone should try being queer at least once in their lives to widen their perspective on life and people

[spnbrainrotawoooga]

My Asian mom once said that later seasons Sam would be a transgender nun if he were a real person. She then did not elaborate on why or what made her say that.

[theforesteldritch]

This is going to be hard to articulate properly, but I feel like there's a strange phenomenon where some people will amplify intersex people on the topic of IGM and condemn IGM without issue (which, to be clear, in and of itself, is a good thing) but then are entirely ignorant to, sometimes because of genuine ignorance, but too often due to the equivalent of plugging their ears and going 'lalala I can't hear you', the issue of medical abuse when it comes to older intersex people. I saw someone once agreeing with how horrific and damaging IGM is- but then proceeded to essentially accuse intersex people of lying about our experiences of medical abuse in our teens and later, often when it comes to puberty. And unfortunately, a lot of this that I've seen comes from other queer people.

Which just. Is incomprehensible to me, mostly because I've lived through medical abuse based off of being intersex, but I think it speaks to the way people view victims of oppression and abuse. They want to be seen as allies, because they know that in terms of optics, it's bad to be silent on the oppression of other marginalized people, but they don't want to examine or even consider their own underlying biases and their intersexism.

Saying 'yeah, I'm against the medical abuse of babies', but ignoring what older intersex people face is seen as fine, because babies are almost treated as the perfect victims: victims of this systemic oppression, yet also fundamentally don't understand this oppression yet, because, well, they're infants. Babies are unable to express themselves (at least until said babies grow up), and so while everyone can agree that hurting babies is bad, those babies can't push back against other biases against intersex people that someone might have. You can, and have to, speak for babies, because they can't speak for themselves, but a baby also can't challenge intersexist beliefs the same way an older or adult intersex person can. It's easy to stand up for a group that can't tell you you also have the capacity to harm us.

And so when an older intersex person says, 'hey, this is medical abuse that I went through because I'm intersex', that statement is suddenly treated with doubt, especially when it someone challenges someone's worldview. 'I was forced on HRT as a teen and that was bad' becomes uncomfortable to condemn, because that's seen as something that could challenge, say, their experiences and access to HRT, and they're unwilling to think critically and look at that from a nuanced and deeper perspective: they see our fight against oppression as a challenge to their fight, ignoring that our underlying goals align: bodily autonomy and the right to informed, non-coercive consent. They can only see the issue from the perspective of someone who, say, wants to ban HRT, because they don't want to budge an inch to anything that 'validates' that take; they can only see 'medical abuse that I went through was bad and shouldn't happen' as 'See, this is why HRT is always bad and why this should be banned,' even though the same people who want to ban and restrict HRT also want the freedom to continue to abuse intersex people. It's a fundamentally defensive position that throws intersex people to the curb because people don't want to acknowledge and make space for nuance; it's considered too 'difficult'. 'I went through something bad because it stripped me of my bodily autonomy' is seen as 'I went through something bad and so I want to strip your bodily autonomy', and this fundamental misunderstanding and this caving to internalized bias against intersex people becomes a tool to attempt to try to better a perisex person's own material conditions on the backs of intersex people. It of course doesn't work, we're all crabs in a bucket fighting for air, but people don't seem to understand that, or they just don't care.

No one is immune to intersexism. You don't get to claim to be an ally when you'd try to drown the other crabs in the bucket to try and hope of being able to get more access to the air. But people don't want to confront or examine the fact that they're someone capable of harm, someone capable of expressing hurtful beliefs. And so it devolves into attempts to delegitimize anything anyone who tells you that you are in fact being hurtful.

[jaragirl]

I have so many thoughts circulating in my mind about Let Free the Curse of Taekwondo 😭 esp ep 5 & 6

I don’t know if I can adequately express any of it but I have to try

This show is so fucking beautiful and so sad it’s sadly beautiful. Every scene is touched with melancholy that’s just lingering around each frame.

Even when the characters should be happy, should be content- Do Hoe, who’s supposedly accomplished everything he set out to do, is so removed & out of touch he can’t enjoy it (pills & alcohol) and even when he tries to share it with Ju Yeong they’re not happy and most of that has to do with how closed off Do Hoe is. How absolutely terrified he is to be vulnerable to be “caught” out and how incapable Ju Yeong is of being anything but open 😭 even Hyeon Ho who out of guilt and love is helping Do Hoe cover up the fact that he did not go to that prestigious Uni (IMO), who’s spent the past 10 years next to Do Hoe and is still no closer to him despite everything he’s given him (connections, job, apartment etc.) ughhhhhhh my heart aches for everyone…everyone’s hurting

Some other things I’ve been thinking about in no particular order

- I don’t know if Do Hoe & Ju Yeong will make it. Do Hoe’s insistence on leaving the past which is really him avoiding his trauma is not gonna allow them to be truly intimate again or happy. It’ll shrink & freeze Ju Yeong if he continues to placate Do Hoe just like it has Hyeon Ho. They also have nothing in common anymore. They don’t need to save each other and they don’t need to run away. So unless they have something they want to build together like a ::taekwondo gym:: I don’t see it working 😭

- Also we have to return to taekwondo 🥋 right?! Like that’s what is actually going to free Do Hoe. He has to face the violence of the sport he loved and the person he loves and himself if he’s going to start to heal. I can see them sparing or Ju Yeong using it as a way to get Do Hoe to break down his walls

- Ju Yeong will have to lay down his cross, as in, he cannot continue to be Jesus sacrificing himself (physically & emotionally) for the people he loves and wants to protect especially when no one has ever protected him 😭 he’s so Jesus coded literally forgiving Do Hoe’s father (we could see this from how he fed him from his hand), wanting to take up the mantle of his “father’s” work, how he offers compassion to Do Hoe after he learns he called the cops

- There’s so many religious layers to this cause Do Hoe is filled w/ so much shame and guilt for at one point having loved his father, the anger that has the potential to consume him, allowing his lover to take beatings for him so he could continue pretending/surviving, the lying he’s doing about University, the lying he’s doing about saying he never thinks of the past (it’s still so clearly controlling him)

- The irony of Ju Yeong’s happiest time being when they first fell in love, even though he was being abused throughout, and it being a time that Do Hoe feels tortured thinking about 😭 they are not in the same place at all emotionally

- Also I’m not totally convinced Do Hoe & Hyeon Ho haven’t had a drunken hookup at least once. They practically live together. I feel like Hyeon Ho’s penance for abandoning there budding romantic feelings & rejecting it before it could even start/becoming a bully is tied to the apartment, the car & the job Do Hoe has. He’s just been trying to earn back the chance to touch Do Hoe again and 😭 idk in some ways he feels better suited to who Do Hoe is proclaiming to be than Ju Yeong

- Lastly, what’s with the chapstick!! It’s a symbol for queerness right?! Was the 1st time we saw Do Hoe use it supposed to be a signifier for a queer character?? The fact that Ju Yeong after being with Do Hoe begins using it too?? Will we see Hyeon Ho “come out” & use chapstick too?! (I refuse to believe it’s just product placement or insignificant)

Anyway I love this show!! It’s perfect and it’s heartbreaking and I wish I could get 15 more of them right now

[proteovaldez]

Im gonna talk Jason, Reyna and Octavian. Reminder I haven’t read these books in like five or more years. Are these headcannons? Let’s call it that.

Wolf boy Jason should be talked about more. Also I like Octavian as a character cause he’s a little freak. And Reyna is my personal Ace/Aro representation. My sister and I have made little phrases to help others understand how we’ve characterized them. Octavian is “Dog eat Dog.” Reyna is “Dog and Dog.” Jason is “Doggie Dog.”

Now to explain how I think pre Hera/Juno Camp Jupiter was like. So in my mind time works differently at the wolf house. Reasoning, no way a two year old in just a year is Roman ready. So Jason spends a lot of time there. He’s a baby, so obviously he picks up on the wolf stuff and as a result he’s more animalistic. The only explanation why he was able to succeed at being a soldier at age three for fifteen years is because he is not the usual soldier. He’s a wolf first and a Roman soldier second. No matter how much training you have, it’s kind of hard to beat someone who is not afraid to bite and theoretically tear out your throat. I like to think he had longish hair. I mean I fully believe he refused shoes and his cohorts would brush his hair or give him head scratches. He has definitely bit an adult.

Now Reyna is just trying to do her job. I mean you’re telling me that Jason wouldn’t immediately investigate the new girl. He does and she’s cool. When did she get the metal dogs? Doesn’t matter she’s clearly good with dogs. Also both of them are great fighters and intelligent. I’m confident they bonded even before he became praetor. I fully believe they are in love. I mean like queer platonic love. Like the most they’ve done is holding pinkies when slightly stressed or doing each other’s hair. She cringes when he tried to hug her once. So when they both are praetors it’s her just silently begging for him to wear shoes at meetings.

Now Octavian, our favorite little freak of a teen. Octavian is a legacy, I’m assuming his parents live in New Rome. I like your think Jason went to a school and had classes with Octavian. Octavian has always been weird. Also he can read. I don’t remember if legacies are also dyslexic, but you’re telling me Octavian wouldn’t know how to read with no struggle. He would and he’d lord it over everyone. I just know he’s always been a little ambitious and power hungry. I mean what child with prophetic tendencies wouldn’t crave power? He definitely notices Jason is powerful and useful. He knows it’s better to be on the possible feral child’s side. Also he’s incredibly patriotic like most Roman’s are historically at least. He knows Jason is good for Rome and I bet he’s one of the many who thought Jason fumbled choosing the fifth cohort. Like he’s known of Jason forever and knows that Jason is all for the Roman cause he’s a child soldier. He can rely on Jason to be on the side of Rome. Now Reyna he definitely was wary until he actually met her. He’s a smart kid, so obviously he likes Reyna. He respects her greatly until she becomes Praetor. After that he has two separate Reyna’s in his mind. There’s smart, intelligent Reyna, and then there’s Praetor Reyna. The second one is an implied sneer. Cause I bet she’s had to alter her original ideas and plans to appeal to the council. Octavian has heard Reyna’s original plans and thinks they’re genius, but Praetor Reyna is a sellout.

The three of them are literally the most recognized campers at Camp Jupiter. It’s kind of hard to not at least respect your coworkers when they’re useful and technically are working towards the same goal. Like Reyna wasn’t there long so she probably was just pleased she had people to talk to. Maybe not friends exactly but acquaintances. And Jason likes people. Then Octavian likes useful people. Also they’re teenagers. I just know the three of them hung out and have stupid jokes, but only do so in private as they’re kind of serious people.

[wombatwisdom]

Thoughts from the Gather Conference

I want to take some time to engage with some of the speakers from the Gather Conference. I do want to share my thoughts with others, but mostly I'm doing this for myself. Also, my thoughts are based on my recollections of speeches I have only heard once and do not have the text to review, so everything is my paraphrasing and interpretation.

-------------------------------------------------

Charlie Bird and Allison Dayton spoke one right after the other on Day 2 of the conference and whether intentional or not, their messages paired nicely.

Charlie's address, entitled "Resolution through the Gospel of Christ" focused mostly on dispelling the myth of having to choose between being a child of God and a member of the LGBTQ+ community. He believes that the idea of needing choose is a lie and one that is held onto by traditional thinking. His call to arms was to actively choose both, be a child of God who is out and proud.

Allison Dayton's speech, entitled "Enlarge the Place of Thy Tent", was focused on reaching out to people in the "wilderness of life" and invite them into our tents. She was clear that the tent in her analogy is not the Church as an institution but rather the personal tent of our lives. She said, quite clearly, that we cannot do much about the church's policies of inclusion, but we can invite everyone into our circles of love regardless.

-------------------------------------------------

Potentially controversial take here, so fair warning.

To the outside observer these talks seem a bit toothless, especially when looked at from an activist lens. Enlarging circles of love and being out and proud children of God on their own seem like harmless and lackluster. If you are looking for monumental change, will either of these acts actually accomplish that?

I'm also not sure Charlie or Allison have alterior motivations here, they may not be actively trying shake things up, but my Machiavellian little soul can help but see something deeper going on here.

The church is often times miles behind when it comes to social change and obvious activism hardly ever results in much more than name calling. True change in the church comes from those in minority groups gradually carving out acceptance and many many many meetings with those in power. And since most of us won't sit in counsils with those in control, we must settle with carving out acceptance.

Here is where Charlie and Allison come in. There is something transgressive in what they are saying while still remaining technically within the doctrines of mormonism.

Charlie's approach feels similar to Harvey Milk's in the 1970's. Milk's philosophy was that everyone should be out in all walks of life to show that "average people" knew someone in the LGBTQ+ community. This was controversial at the time and still is now, but I can see the appeal of this approach. And I personally think there was some success in the normalization of a very specific type of "queer person" in the mainstream.

Charlie's proposal directly confronts the belief that some Mormons hold that the LGBTQ+ community is somehow not part of the Momron community. Or that we shouldn't be. And I do think that being out, at the very least, would force people to recognize we exist and we are unavoidable.

Allison's approach is different but reaches a similar outcome (and can be practiced by Allies and LGBTQ+ folks). By encouraging people to expand their circles of inclusion she is subtly disrupting the status quo in Mormonism. Ultimately she is proposing a grassroots movement, first of love and support, that if grown large enough might force larger change.

-------------------------------------------------

Now again, this is my inference and thoughts. And both of these approaches are very quiet forms of activism that don't ask for very much and deliberately indirect. This is, if it is anything, the long game.

I think I wanted to share this because often this type of advocacy is either dismissed entirely by critics or is easily missed by those looking for it as the advocacy is implied rather than stated.

At the end of the day, advocacy in this space is controversial, difficult, and messy. And while imperfect--i think that there is at least hope to be had. Because even if change doesn't come, Charlie's and Allison's visions will still be vital in building community which is always needed.

[monorayjak]

I... it's getting hard to live like this. Hiding who I am to so many people. It hurts. I wrote a thing earlier today and I felt I summed up the feeling pretty well I think, reworded a bit to sound better:

"It feels like torturous self harm to be fully aware of who I am and yet imprison myself in a fortress of a false identity that's slowly caving in around me."

What I'm getting at here... I think... I think it might be time for me to come out to some people...and I really need some advice.

As of now, only four people IRL know about me, that's my therapist, my cousin (who was genuinely more like a sister to me), a friend at college (I knew they were extremely supportive and they had no connection to other people I know, so it seemed like a safe bet to tell her (I was right)), a friend I interacted with occasionally in high school who has since come out as trans herself (actually what got me to message her, saw her online and wanted to ask so I didn't misgender her or anything, and we got talking and I quickly realized she'd understand.)

At the moment, I'm still living with my mom, which is fine, I know she'll support me in her own way (she's queer herself, she has internalized issues, but she tries). I know my university I go to, despite having once been a "christian college," have opened up and been supportive of most of the students who do come out in one way or another. I know at least a few of the professors there who are absolutely trying to be supportive to everyone to the best of their abilities. My therapist knows, as mentioned before, but he is also... well, he ain't exactly a pro with gender and sexuality stuff (still a good guy, he just messes up what he's talking about here and there, like using masculine pronouns when he talks about a transwoman (largely I think its because he usually talks about them when they first started transitioning, and I don't think he thinks about gendering them correctly in reference to them coming out... if that makes any sense).

The issues... well, for one, I live in the bible belt. My extended family (who we are finally trying to cut ourselves off from now that the only think holding us together (my grandmother) is gone) lives all around me and the majority of them are.........well lets just say they really don't like my mom being gay, and one of them bullied a kid he was fostering because, in his words, "the kid's a fucking sissy!" Yeah... not a fan of that uncle. (In related news I am genuinely afraid of that man because he is very fucking clearly not mentally stable and has talked about killing himself and others before (while preaching at church!) and he is... really aggressive and has access to guns) I'm too poor to even consider leaving the state, and with... well frankly I'm a bit of a fuckup who really can't live on their own... yeah... fun times. Insurance may cover parts of things, but... honestly I don't even fucking know. Like I said, I know my mom will try to support me, but she is also... well, how do I say this? She tends to not know how to react to stuff. A large reason I don't talk about stuff with her is that she has a habit of turning it around into something about herself (not in a manipulative way, mind you. I just think she doesn't realize why it feels bad to tell her something like this and then have her break down a bit because I didn't tell her sooner or because she didn't work it out herself or anything like that). Basically, if I tell her, its either going to go one of two ways.

She reacts negatively and turns it around about herself and takes the moment to be hurt she didn't work things out or that I didn't tell her. (Literally once opened up to her when I was little (like 11?) about how much I hated myself... she said the next day she spent the entire night crying because she thought she failed... I understand what she was going for, but, honestly not something you should tell your kid who just opened up. Practically had it ingrained internally "If I feel bad, hide it. Because my mom will be devastated by it.")

She goes too supportive and expects me to be willing to open up immediately. Basically just forgetting she can't push me into being out and honest because it takes time to work up the courage.

Both of these options are... iffy. To say the least.

[alarrytale]

Genuinely asking what’s the fine line between being fame and attention hungry and being obliged to stunt? The more he participates in stunting the less sorry I feel for him and his situation, it seems that it’s his choice and hes fine with it and doesn’t want to change it and cares currently only about his fame and money. I love hl so much but it’s so difficult to accept their priorities and the way they manipulate the fandom

I think you've got to draw your own lines. What you are comfortable with and not, based on how much agency you think they have or not have. Only you can make that decision.

I agree that Harry the last couple of years have seemed very Hollywood oriented, yachting, living the life of the rich and famous and just generally taking advantage of all his privileges. Hanging around people with questionable morals, making fake friends and helping others with their image rehabs. Launching Pleasing off of his own brand at blood prices for a quick buck. Pricing his tour at ridicous levels during a cost of living crisis. All of this are examples of things that makes it harder to give him any sympathy at all. His current image is a rich, privileged white dude who's faking his way to the top while also trying to make money. He's queerbaiting enough to get that queer dollar, but presenting straight to get the parent dollar too. We thought he was different, had morals and lines he wouldn't cross. I wish he had someone around reminding him of his ankle screw tattoos. He might have, and this is all an image he's selling. Everything he does off stage is such a turn off though. So much of what he's preaching and saying seems hollow. There's become a discrepancy between what he's saying and how he's acting. He's trying to be everything to everyone all at once and nothing seems authentic anymore. I think his current behaviour is pushing people away. At least it should be.

It's all generally worse when he's off tour. It has always been like that. This stunt in particular seems not so bad actually. I just think we all have major stunt fatigue and we are tired of his face. It's also worse for us fans when he looks happy and not miserable. He's majorly overexposed and he's gonna end up like TS, needing an image overhaul if he's not careful.

If you don’t agree with their priorities and manipulation the best thing (and only thing) you can do is to call them out on it and don't buy the things they are selling you. Don't feed the monster.

[strawberryblondebutch]

Back by unpopular demand, it's my top albums of 2023! While 2022 suffered a dearth of good artists that made it impossible to cobble together a top 10, I struggled this year to whittle my 50(!!)-album shortlist down to my top.

Same rules as always: everything on this list is a full-length album (no EPs) of largely previously unreleased material (no reissues, no cover albums, no Taylor's Version) arranged in an intentional manner (no B-sides or rarities albums). Now, behold!

10. DOG PARK DISSIDENTS - THE PINK AND BLACK ALBUM

I hope I'm not the only punk frustrated with the decline of queer rage in the music scene. Everyone's sad and no one is angry. If you're sick of being well-behaved, this is the album for you. I've been a Dog Park Dissidents fan for years now, and I'm thrilled to see them put out an LP, especially one as great as this one.

9. SINCERE ENGINEER - CHEAP GRILLS

Something everyone needs to know about me: I love a girlflop. There is nothing more endearing than an absolute disaster of a woman, and no one is flopping through life quite like Deanna Belos. Her third album brings her scratchy-voiced brashness into her early 30s, and as much as I hope for an end to her crisis, at least she has a good soundtrack going.

8. ALL GET OUT - ALL GET OUT

Wouldn't it be easy if I didn't listen to any albums? If I just put my favorite bands in the top ten and said "that's enough hard work, I think"? Well, I don't, because sometimes there's a surprise. All Get Out has frustrated me for a while, as their Southern-fried brand of rock and roll is something I should like, but they never seemed to put it all together... until now.

7. BLONDSHELL - BLONDSHELL

Sabrina Mae Teitelbaum showed up at the eleventh hour to wreck my rankings. I was unaware of Blondshell until they opened for Liz Phair a month ago, and I was intrigued enough to follow up and listen to her debut. Her stage presence needs some work -- unlike, say, Foxing's latest album, which I learned to love once I heard it live, I think Blondshell is better recorded -- but if this is her first effort, I can't wait to see what she does next.

6. ZZ WARD - DIRTY SHINE

2023 was the year of blues rock artists going independent, and their music was all the better for it. The Record Company was a late cut for my honorable mentions, but ZZ takes the sixth spot here. There was a lot riding on Dirty Shine: she was independent and had been mostly silent since the pandemic. With some of the tightest production I've seen this year, she hasn't missed a step.

5. QUEENS OF THE STONE AGE - IN TIMES NEW ROMAN...

Talk about someone who's been through the wringer since their last album. Josh Homme battled cancer, alcoholism, and a bitter divorce, and his band's latest release is one of pent-up rage. It bears strong shades of 2007's Era Vulgaris, which was divisive in its own time, and as a result, some might hate In Times New Roman... for its looser, crunchier sound. For me? It's exactly what I like to hear.

4. SPANISH LOVE SONGS - NO JOY

I have a confession: I'm a terrible album reviewer. It takes me weeks or months to listen to something new, even for my favorite artists, like Spanish Love Songs. I didn't get around to No Joy until just before I went to see SPL open for Hot Mulligan, at which point I felt like the time had come. This album was an acquired taste, smoother and more polished than 2020's Brave Faces, Everyone, but like Frightened Rabbit's 2016 Painting of a Panic Attack, the sparser sound lets you focus on what Dylan et al. are trying to say, and you can soon tell No Joy is an album that needed to come out for his own sake.

3. HEART ATTACK MAN - FREAK OF NATURE

Speaking of "late on the draw," behold Heart Attack Man, a band I should have loved... if I ever got around to listening to them. They hang around all the same scenes my other favorite bands do (in fact, Hot Mulligan also brought them along on their most recent tour), and yet I never got around to exploring them until this June, when they played in Philly for $20 tickets. Good thing my impulses won out, because this album is what punk should be (and something it's been sorely missing).

2. HOT MULLIGAN - WHY WOULD I WATCH?

After shouting them out in the last two entries, I have to give Hot Mulligan their flowers. They're a strange band, having more in common with Dance Gavin Dance than, say, The Wonder Years. It's progressive post-hardcore for Midwest emos, and although the individual songs on Why Would I Watch? are on par with any individual song from a previous release, they do something here that elevates them above their other work: put out an album, rather than a collection of songs.

1. FIREWORKS - HIGHER LONELY POWER

It was always going to be Fireworks. They released this album on January 1 after a long hiatus, giving me an entire year to have this LP rattle in my brain and linger in my bones. Higher Lonely Power combines several trends found on the rest of this list -- a new sound that needed to grow on me, a need to shake off the rust of a hiatus, a band I took far too long to get to know. They're my favorite band's favorite band for a reason, and Higher Lonely Power is a gorgeous mediation on love, death, and aging. A worthy album of the year if ever there were one.

[somethin-real]

Thanks for answering my ask....If you don't mind me asking (again), can I ask, what are your top 10 (or top 7) favorite media (can be books/ manga/ anime/movies/tv series)? Why do you love them? Sorry if you've answered this question before.....

I am once again answering asks months later than I should have because time isn’t real and I never open my phone BUT I will never give up an excuse to talk about the stuff I like so let’s go

(This is in no particular order because besides the first two I can’t pick a favourite child)

1) interview with the vampire (tv)

God. This thing has taken over my brain chemistry. I first watched it as the first season aired a few years back and loved it then and now that the second season has aired I literally cannot stop thinking about it. I have watched every episode of this series at least four times, some more than others because I genuinely can’t get enough. It’s simply so perfect to me… the camp… the vampires… everyone should watch this at least once in their lives (I am also currently working my way through the books and they are so tasty)

2) nbc Hannibal

GUH. I strangely never talk about it but Hannibal was one of the first shows to rewire my brain like iwtv has. I first watched it back in high school I think after a girl I had a crush on lended it to me on a usb stick and I think it’s so perfect. I find it really beautiful in a real vile way (pos) and can watch it over and over without tiring (in fact I could probably recite many of the episodes off by heart which I wouldn’t consider a problem but Some People might). The relationship between Hannibal and Will is so palpable and harrowing and I genuinely once wrote an essay on it for uni (I got an eighty) because I’m Normal

3) life is strange 2

a bit of a random one, but ever since I played the first episode of lis2, I’ve been obsessed with it. say what you want about the lis games, but there’s something really lovely to me about Sean and Daniel. maybe it’s because it reminds me of my little brother, maybe it’s because the experience of being a Latin person in North America is so familiar, but it’s a really beautiful game and I’ve replayed it… seven times now? I think? I keep trying to get different endings but I’m weird about making people do bad stuff in video games surprisingly

4) red dead redemption 2

Look man. I like cowboys, I like the great outdoors, I like the idea that Arthur Morgan (gunslinging criminal) is actually a pretty princess. Maybe I’m projecting but he really is a beautiful woman to me. this is another game I’ve played way too many times even though playing the epilogue bit where you have to build the fence makes me want to die. also Javier and John should kiss and I want sadie Adler to be my wife

5) sarazanmai

Maybe a bit of an oddball but this is one of those anime that’s like looking at a car wreck. You simply cannot look away. What began as a strange, mythological mindfuck of a show slowly morphed into a beautiful story about queerness and friendship and love and I recommend it to everyone because I just think it’s so good

6) wildhood

This movie fundamentally changed me. It’s a Canadian queer indigenous coming of age film that I watched on a whim when I was scrolling through a streaming service on a lazy weeknight a few years ago, and I didn’t expect it to be something so beautiful and touching. It’s about a young guy named link who finds out his mother (who left him with his abusive father) is alive, and so he crosses the province trying to find her with his younger half brother and someone who’d saved him from some racist convenience store owner. It’s a visually really pretty movie, and on top of that the story is absolutely beautiful and makes me cry every time I watch it. I think I’ve forced every single one of my friends to watch this movie all the while I stared at them like this 👁️👁️ to gauge their reaction to it. please please please watch this

7) to be taught if fortunate by becky chambers

this book!!!!!! THIS BOOK!!!! I had to read this for first year English my first year of university and normally books I’m forced to read are never ones that have a hold on me but I genuinely could not put this book down. I’m also not really one for science fiction, but despite the overall premise (a bunch of researchers get cryo slept in space only to awake and find that a disaster has happened on earth, wiping out a majority of the population) I feel like it focuses less on the science fiction and more so on the relationships between all of the astronauts, most of whom are queer and in a weird pseudo poly relationship with each other. idk I just thought this book was really beautiful and fun and I think everyone should read it

8) jojo’s bizarre adventure

look. this thing had to make it on here okay. I put off getting into jojo for a long time even though I’d been thoroughly aware of it even back in middle school, and when I finally caved I watched all of it in about two months, shaking and gnawing at the bars of my enclosure the whole time. it’s just so silly and fun and I think kishibe rohan should be real (he is)

I was going to add more but my brain somehow isn’t working so I’m going to do some honourable mentions again in no particular order: yakuza series, death note, after dark by haruki murakami, anything by Allen Ginsberg, kill your darlings, it’s always sunny in Philadelphia, fellow travellers (book and show)

Thank you so much for the ask!

[yuri-for-businesswomen]

it can feel so so hopeless to hold radfem beliefs. honestly i was active in the movement up until some years ago but then it felt so dangerous and so heartbreaking to be aware of so much of tje rampant sexism in society i just... strayed away. i still hold my beliefs but i don't make them public anymore in fear of being ostracized like some of my friends have. i'd love to date once more but cannot find like-minded women around me and i feel that even other radfems would judge me for leaving the activism. it is so lonely and i feel like such a coward. (sorry just been bottling up all this for a while. maybe i should just make a radfem tumblr and try to connect with y'all)

hey dear! i would love for you to come back to tumblr, i find it helps me a lot to connect with likeminded women. but you also have to be careful because you get a lot of depressing news, facts and takes here. its important to take breaks. but i think everyone would warmly welcome you back.

i also get your frustration with other women. im blessed my closest friends are likeminded to me, but i also live in a very liberal „queer“ city and have had issues building friendship with and dating women despite getting along well because they are so deep into this liberal pro kink pro porn pro prostitution pro trans thing they will immediately cut you off when they find out you oppose that. ive found it easier to connect to women who are not very political because they dont have a big opinion on these things or consider themselves feminist but then inevitably say something you can use as a starting point to talk about some feminist issues without calling it such and find out they do have opinions and they do agree with at least the basis of some radical feminist analysis. if you know what i mean

dont give up hope, we are out there! we are around each other we just have to find us!

[your-queer-dad]

(Vent sorry, not about queerness I just have nowhere else to say this where I'll get any sort of response)

Ive been having to deal with so much stuff lately. Like I was fine when I was in the midst of severe depression cause I didn't think I'd live very long anyways but now I need to come to terms with everything I've been ignoring for at least a year and at most my whole life. Like I'm AuDHD in a decently ableist family (middle/working class white cishet moderate leftists who think they're very progressive, you know the type) and I've had absolutely shit experiences with the people who should be helping me with that stuff (my old therapist was actively uneducated and ableist, my psychiatrist was a white cishet man in his 60s or 70s and I had to teach him what masking is and how adhd and autism present in AFAB people) which makes that really difficult in general because all my friends know I have AuDHD but I can't officially come out and say that I do because my family will deny it and tell me I'm being attention seeking and looking for excuses for being lazy and a flawed person. I also don't physically look the way I've been convincing myself I look naturally for a long time (yay anorexia recovery) and it's just messing me up a lot because when I look at my reflection I just feel visceral disgust. I'm still on the lower end of a healthy weight, but I can only see a few of my ribs now and my stomach isn't flat anymore. Everyone else says they can't notice but I feel like I've lost everything that made me good, and I'm scared that gaining weight is going to stop me from passing. I hate being with my parents and I just feel like I'm a horrible person for that, I only got hit once and other than that they're just toxic and sort of manipulative/emotionally abusive. They try their best they just can't raise me right and I feel like shit for that. I wish I could be spending more time outside, but I had a medical emergency thing on Tuesday (my mom doesn't let me call it a seizure because we don't know for sure) and I'm scared that that's going to happen again, and my constant joint pain has just gotten worse. My friends are telling me that I need to talk to a doctor about this, but the wait time for rheumatology is insane and my parents thing I'm making it up/exaggerating/looking for attention and even if they believe me they don't think it's important and worth getting help for. I'm scared that I'm going to die, last time it happened my entire body went numb and stiff and I couldn't move and I was just twitching for like 15 minutes. I also completely lost my vision before this happened, and it was greyscale/coming back slowly for the entire thing, plus I could barely hear anything. If that happens again I genuinely think that I might die. I also have scars all over my legs and chest and I have to either hide them or find some sort of explanation for them that won't make the people I work with during the summer think I'm not suited for working with kids (summer camp counseling). I spent all of last year thinking I was never going to turn 15 and now I kind of wish I hadn't.

I want to live but it's all so overwhelming and if I falter or let my parents see that I'm scared, they'll force me into the role of a small child and start treating me like a toddler or an animal like they always do. I just don't know what to do and I know it's horrible and selfish and disgusting but I just wish my mom would die. I can't live like this, it's only 3 more years but I'm just so scared. She keeps threatening me and saying I won't get into college or I'm failing high school because of how long I was out of school due to psych ward stuff even though she knows that not getting into college is my main fear- if that happens, I can't keep going. I know that I'm going to kill myself if I can't get into college. After that I'm still going to need to pay off student loans and I might not have my best friend with me (if I have him ill be okay and he says that he promises he'll try to live with me in college) and I just can't deal with that. I need to catch up on school and I need to learn to drive and then I need to get ready for my job in the summer and I need to make sure my grades are good enough for colleges to want me and I need to get people to like me and I just can't do it. I don't want to die but I feel like it's the only answer, I'm just not capable of doing this. I'm not supposed to be alive. I don't know what I'm supposed to do

Sorry about the rant you don't need to answer at all I know this is a lot

-🔆

Hey kiddo. Please please don't apologise for reaching out, I'm here for you and I'm always here for you, night and day my inbox and DMs are always open to anyone who needs to talk.

God, it sounds like you've had a rough deal. I understand where you're coming from. With parents, it's so hard when they don't do what they're supposed to do as parents and they don't understand you or believe you when you ask for help. It's awful and I am so sorry.

From the sounds of things, it sounds like you're putting a lot of pressure on yourself, as well as all that pressure around you. As scary as the future is, it isn't going to creep up on you one day. It's tomorrow and the day after that and the day after that and the day after that and every single day after that. You have time to breathe and rest and do whatever you need to do. You can't do everything at once, you're only human- and expecting yourself to do everything at once only caused burn out and stress.

Also, as a person who's gone through eating disorder recovery- weight doesn't stop you from passing. I promise you it doesn't. It's a good thing! It's a sign that all the work you've done recovering has paid off. I'm proud of you.

Keep your head up kiddo, I'm so so proud of you. Remember to take care of yourself, let yourself breathe and don't expect yourself to do everything all at once. I'm here anytime you need to talk.

Love you,

- dad x

[louiskechi]

alright let’s get this over with

here is a basic summary of all you could possibly need to know about me before you go starting something with me (this will be updated as i see fit)

-trans rights are human rights. this is not up for debate and is a block on sight if you disagree. same goes for black lives matter, and any other basic human rights that people somehow take offense to.

-xenogenders, lesboys/girl gays, mspec lesbians/gays, and all other non traditional or contradictory labels are valid. you can continue being angry that you aren’t allowed to fit queer people into strictly confined boxes all you want, but the long term goal of the queer movement should always be to break down restrictive labels and emphasize being who you are. this applies to neopronouns as well, obviously. all good faith identities are valid. full stop.

-transandrophobia is real. to deny that transmasculine people experience a unique type of transphobia tailored by bigots to specifically target our experiences is complacency. if you engage in hierarchical structures to organize the oppression marginalized people experience (i.e. saying things like “tme people need to shut up for once” when discussing transphobia) is reductive and only divides the community.

-self diagnosing is valid. not everyone has access to psychiatrists, let alone ones who will give a proper assessment. it’s also worth mentioning that both the medical field and the government have a lot of ingrained ableism, which can bar you from access to jobs, and can cause you to lose legal rights and bodily autonomy. (did you know getting an autism diagnosis can prevent you from getting a visa to most countries? it can even get you placed on a mandatory DNR!) accompanying this, i do not care what a system’s origin is. as a plural person, i couldn’t give less of a shit. if you say what you’re experiencing is plurality, i will believe you. trying to determine who “is and isn’t actually plural” does nothing but give fuel to those who will fake-claim us no matter how much proof we provide. you are helping divide our community and prevent mentally ill people from getting support that could save their lives.

-proshippers are annoying as fuck and i hate you all. no, you are not “just anti harassment,” in fact it’s a favorite hobby for quite a few of you. i do not identify as “anti ship” but having an integral part of your identity being that you think shipping a grown man with a child is fine tells me something about you that you somehow haven’t realized about yourselves. and no, you being a trauma survivor does not absolve you of abhorrent behavior. at this point it’s not even the content itself that worries me, it’s the relationship you people have with it. you can’t even handle the most mild criticism or discomfort about it. quit bragging about how uncomfortable you make everyone and really evaluate yourself.

-lolicon/shotacon is pedophilia. if you have some sort of objection to that you should really be looking up direct translations of the words you choose to identify yourselves with. terminology aside, no matter how much you try to insist “fiction doesn’t always effect reality,” that fictitious drawing of child rape is certainly effecting the reality of your now-erect cock. consider checking yourself before you get checked into a correctional facility.

-paraphiles deserve understanding and recovery. you are not going to eliminate things like pedophilia and zoophilia by arresting them, or worse, killing them, for feelings they can’t control. the solution to these things is easy access to therapy so they can work through those feelings and hopefully be rid of them one day, or at least no longer be a threat. most paraphiles do not want their paraphilia much less to act on them, and even those who do will not benefit from incarceration.

-the way some of you engage with fictional characters is disgusting. no, vriska serket was not a “girlboss” for telling the person she physically disabled to “apologize for being cr*ppled.” no, you do not think valentino is “just a really interesting villain” when i can see you talking about how sexy he is in the scene where he rapes the protag, followed by woobifying him and never addressing his actions at all. please get off the internet. it is genuinely disturbing the way you talk about these characters and it makes me deeply concerned about how you would act if you ever learned to shut off your computer. and yes, it is that deep.

[alpaca-clouds]

Remembering the Forgotten

I will tell you a secret.

Well, it is not really a secret. But it is something, that we do not talk about - and that we do not like to think about.

Most people who have ever lived on this planet - most people, who ever have been alive - have been forgotten. As in: Nobody alive today knew they were alive forty, a hundred, five hundred, a thousand or even more years ago. Because they just did not leave anything that stood the test of life.

Some of them just lived their life. Day to day. Some of them were even artists, though, or inventors. But they and their art and inventions have been forgotten.

That sounds grim, right?

But... allow me to go all philosophical on you. Because it was something I have struggled with for so, so long. See, when thinking about death, two things have frightened me. For once just the pain that might come with death. But also I was afraid of after a while any trace of me ever having existed being erased from the face of this planet.

It brought with it the pressure to do something - anything - that would be remembered in the future. And with it the helplessness of being a queer, disabled poor person, who is very limited in what he can do that will be remembered.

These days, I have made my peace with being forgotten. Because I realized that more than 99% of all humans on this planets were forgotten. But that did not make their life less meaningless. If anything their lives had meaning to them and probably to some other people. Maybe their children, their partners, their family, their village, their pets... Chances are, that there were some living beings, who had a better life because of them. Who, at least for their short lives, went on to remember the person. Maybe even without knowing their name. And that is worth something, right?

When we think about history, we always speak about popes and kings, maybe some nobles. But they were only a minority. They were only a small percentage of all people on the world. Yes, we remember them, because people have written about them. Because those things written about them have survived time.

But we should think more of the normal people. About just that normal farmer or merchant or hunter or whoever, who have lived and whose names have been lost to time. We should think of them, because some of them might actually have tried to change the world. Some of them did many good things, helping everyone around them. And while we do not know who they were, we know some people like that existed.

And they were human.

And there is also the fact, that... Well, most people we do remember tend to be white blokes. But most people who have ever lived were not.

So just...

Don't be afraid of being forgotten. That does not make your life meaningless.

And instead... try to remember those, who have lived, even though all their marks on the earth were long erased.

Just a thought.

I will probably talk about something more historical next week again. But I needed to get this one out of my system.

[kryptoniteheadcanons]

Thoughts on Black Christmas (2019)

Uhh....brief mentions of sexual assault. Spoilers I guess ...it’s Black Christmas 2019 I don’t think anyone cares.

- I don’t know if I'm going to make a separate post comparing the three of the movies, I might end up saying everything I need to say  in this review. 

- Once again, stop making remakes and sequels that have nothing to do with the original. 

- That snow angle shot was actually pretty cool, I like it. 

- This movie being set at christmas is just as arbitrary as the first one. 

- Yeah, that diva cup thing was pretty awkward. Why did there have to be complete silence while she was putting it in? You couldn’t have used that time for dialogue?

- Oh hi Cary Elwes ….didn’t expect to see you here. 

- God I fucking hate it when professors call on you even though you didn’t raise your hand.

- Also they make Cary’s character so fucking creepy that the first time I saw this I he  assaulted Riley.

- “He totally went off on me because I asked why there were no women, or people of color, or queer people on the syllabus.” Yeah that is weird, most classics lists i’ve seen for colleges, even in 2019, at least have like Frankenstein or a book by one of the Bronte sisters. You have to be trying to not have a woman on the list. (Also: I don’t think they ever mentioned any of their majors? I feel like that would have been a good thing for character building, at least for Riley) 

- Yes, Riley does need to take back her agency and learn how to live her life again, but I don’t think getting up on stage to sing and dance about what is probably one of the most traumatic experiences her life, in front of the person who assualted her, is really the healthiest or safest way to do that. 

- Also, am I the only one that thinks Kris petitioning to get the bust removed from the main hall and that actually happening sounds weird? Maybe it’s just because I went to community college so I don’t know how larger, more established colleges work but that sounds like she was probably petitioning to get the name of the school changed and they just did the bust thing as a ‘compromise’. 

- What did they steal for Kris for the pledges to know that she had to be killed too? 

- Nate, dude, I know you have a migraine or whatever but just leave the room or something. 

- I feel like a lot of real world discussions about feminism and equal rights end up like the one that happened in the kitchen so I think maybe this needs to be said: We do need men in the world, however what we don’t need is bigots and abusers. Misogyny negatively effects all of us, you can talk about the issues men face without having to put down women. 

- I find it really odd that this movie claims to be a more ‘feminist’ version of Black Christmas (I have no idea if the director or writer intended that, maybe it was just a studio or marketing team thing) but they cut out the women’s reproductive rights subplot? How do you even do that? 

- I kind of wish this movie was a full on psychological thriller of Riley having to actually process her trauma instead of being a qausi-slasher movie. 

- Referencing the point above, I feel like the ending is in this weird limbo where it’s not weird enough to clearly be an allegory but it’s also not normal enough to be like, believable. 

- Was Riley’s smile fading at the end because one (or some of them) got out alive or because she realizes that she just destroyed half of the evidence that proves she and Kris didn’t kill all those people?

- Do I think this movie is misandrist propaganda? No. Do I think this movie is great and everyone should see  it? also No. I think its a movie that tried to do something good but fumbled and wound up in a no woman’s land of cringe dialogue and ham fisted morals. 

- also in case anyone was wondering, my favourite character was Jessie, she reminds me of one of my cousins. 

[runawaymun]

Yeah as a member of the lgbtq+ community, i think the smut and marriage question is complicated to say the least.

On one hand, I find anyone who is willing to write smut about their community but not willing to be married in it to be full of internalized homophobia. As you mentioned, a lot of self loathing. I struggle with some internalized homophobia because of society and society’s perceptions and expectations of queer people and of the lack of healthy love and representation of us so I definitely get it.

But on the other hand, (imo) while there’s something to be said in cultures and communities who cannot be open with their sexuality or face death, shunning, violence, etc., OP sounds more like they’re just trying to adhere to their faith. Which is understandable to a certain degree, especially when it’s a big part of their lives, but in the end, Christianity is a choice, any religion is a choice and sexuality and gender identity is not. You can choose not to be Christian if you feel that your holy book doesn’t believe in your safety and existence (it doesn’t obv because the current bible is just mistranslation after mistranslation for the original language so it’s not as accurate as people would think). And to think that your religion is the only way and the only religion is religious supremacy and is a very common belief in Christian communities (and others, as well. It’s especially common with Abrahamic faiths).

Even if it’s someone who is queer, the vibe is very similar to those very commonplace straight women in fandom who watch yaoi or men who watch lesbian porn but won’t let us marry or adopt children because we’re “deviants destroying the fabric of society”. I’m not trying to be mean (and I genuinely hope this doesn’t come across that way) but that’s how it feels to other queer people, especially if they’re not Christian.

And I know it’s complicated and I know it’s hard. Society as a whole doesn’t love us and support us. But we should also do our best to support ourselves, too, I think whether that means finding a more liberal or welcoming church or delving into the first translations of your holy book or something else. Just know there’s options and that you can love yourself and enjoy a life with a person you love, OP.

oh hey it's good to have you in my inbox!! <3

I agree with you so I'm not gonna add anything except to gently say that for queer Christians, for us, especially those who were raised in the church like nonnie and I...there isn't a sense of our sexuality or our faith being more integral to our sense of self then the other. That's what makes this so hard. So yes, Christianity is a choice and being Queer isn't. But oftentimes our faith is where our families are, our entire support system, our communities, our personal histories, and our values of right and wrong. And when you grow up being taught that homosexuality is a sin full-stop, and then you get a bit older and you have to deconstruct that...well then you have to deconstruct your entire life. Possibly your childhood. Your entire paradigm, possibly. And that's really fucking scary. If this thing that I was taught is wrong, what else is wrong, is anything I believe real? I guess that's why I'm being so cautious about this whole thing. Especially because I have no idea about nonnie's age or home situation.

I do think everyone should experience an honest existential crisis at least once in their life (preferably way more than that). It's really healthy. And I absolutely encourage nonnie to please -- don't be afraid to go down that route. Like my bud here said, there are options and you can love yourself and have a life with a person you love.

[alsjeblieft-zeg]

082 of 2023

Are astrological signs at all important in a match?

No, it’s all bullshit to me.

Would you strongly prefer to go out with someone of your own skin color and/or racial background?

No. Both of my exes happen to be white, and so is my husband (although he looks quite ‘southern’, if you know what I mean; dark eyes, dark hair and darker complexion), but I don’t think I’d ditch someone just because of their skin colour. Everyone can be beautiful and I found many black and Asian people aesthetically pleasing.

Say you’ve started seeing someone you really like. As far as you’re concerned, how long will it take before you have sex?

Years. I’m not into this whole sex thing. If I decide to do it, it will be only to please them.

What’s the most exciting thing about getting to know someone new?

Curiosity about what they’re like, what they like, all that.

Is jealousy healthy in a relationship?

To an extent, I think. Overly jealous = toxic and overpowering.

What’s your relationship with marijuana?

I’m not against it.

In a certain light, wouldn’t nuclear war be exciting?

No. It’s fucking dangerous. I’m very interested in ionising radiation, so I know what would be the potential consequences.

How do you feel about the word “queer”?

I’m not bothered. Call yourself anything you want, it’s your choice.

Are you either vegetarian or vegan?

As close to vegetarian as possible. I still allow chicken and fish in my diet, but I try to avoid red meat because I don’t like it.

How do you feel about vegetarianism and what are your views on veganism?

Both are okay, but I’m not fond of extremists who try to force their beliefs on others. You’re vegan, fine. But don’t look down on people who are not.

Should evolution and creationism be taught side-by-side in school?

Yeah, so then children can see the difference and later decide which they believe in.

For you personally, is abortion an option in case of an accidental pregnancy?

I don’t want to speak up about it. First of all, it’s irrelevant to me because I’m a man. Second, it’s your decision because if there are consequences, you will be the one who bears them, not anyone else. So in my book, do whatever the hell you want and what you feel is the best for you. Nobody’s gonna experience it for you anyway.

Once you’re intimate, how often would you and your significant other have sex?

Ideally, never. But in reality, he does need sex sometimes, but I try to keep it at an absolute minimum, because I’m not into sex.

How often are you open with your feelings?

Very rarely. I don’t know how to talk about them.

Could you date someone who was really quiet?

Sure. My husband is not much of a talker, neither am I, and we get along perfectly.

Is it a requirement that you communicate every day with your significant other?

Well, we live together, so it can’t be avoided. :P In any case, I think leaving some space is healthier than being too clingy.

Are you fetish-friendly?

No, I’m fetish-indifferent. Do whatever you like, just not with me please.

Straight women who kiss or fondle each other in clubs in the hopes of attracting men are…?

Not interesting to me, but I’m gay anyway, so.

Which is worse: starving children or abused animals?

What about abused children? All of these are horrible. There’s no better or worse.

Do you look better dressed or naked?

Dressed, hands down. There aren’t so many people who are fond of dudes whose bones stick out.

How do you feel about foreskins?

Better with than without. Also on myself.

Is there at least one nude photo of you on the net?

I don’t think so. I’ve never sent nor posted anything like that anywhere.

Have you ever cosplayed?

No, never. I’m not really interested in it.

Is it wrong to sleep in a bed and/or cuddle with a friend of the sex(es) you’re attracted to when you’re in an exclusive relationship with someone else?

As long as you don’t do sexual things together, I don’t see a problem.

If you had your own private hot tub, would you go nude in it?

Most likely. If it’s private, then it’s private, what else is there to say.

Is it wrong to cultivate or manufacture illegal drugs?

Well, they’re illegal for a reason.

How do you feel about government-subsidized food programs?

Depends on the government. Every country does it differently, I guess.

Do you believe that heterosexual pornography is degrading to women?

Many of them decide to enter the industry and they know what they’re doing. If someone is forced to do it, then it’s degrading for sure.

Do you support the exploration of outer space and if yes, would you consider taking a trip into space, or even to another planet?

Sure, it’s just natural to be curious. But I doubt I’d ever go to space. I find it kinda scary.

Could you have respect for someone after having sex with them on the first meeting or date?

My relationship started off as friendships, and in such case I don’t see any problem with sex on a first date because you already know each other pretty well. Speaking of that, I definitely wouldn’t lose my respect.

Is it okay for men to wear makeup, and what’s your opinion of male cross-dressers?

"Everyone has the right to freedom of opinion and expression". It’s a quote from a song and I live by it. Let people be who they want to be.

In terms of sex, how experienced would your ideal mate be with people other than you?

I couldn’t care less.

Do you often find yourself worrying about things that you have no control over?

All the time. My anxiety is bad.

Do you spend more money on clothes or food?

Still food, but only because there’s three of us, plus two cats.

Is a girl who’s slept with 100 guys a bad person, and is a guy who’s slept with 100 girls a bad person?

If you have a good personality, it doesn’t matter how many people you sleep with. As long as you don’t hurt people with it.

You’re in a new relationship and your partner admits that they have had 14 sexual partners; does that sound like a lot to you?

It does, but only because I’m not sexual. On long term, it doesn’t really matter, but I’d be a bit afraid of being pushed to be another one.

Do you feel like you’re still hurting from something that happened to you a long time ago?

Yeah, scars from sexual abuse never really heal.

Do you attempt to conserve water, energy or other resources during your everyday life?

I don’t have to worry about it as a person with disability.

When chatting with a potential friend or significant other online, is use of proper grammar and spelling important to you?

I don’t believe in online relationships.

Would you let your children under 13 watch movies with full nudity?

No children for me, thanks.

If someone asked you, “What’s the worst thing you’ve ever done?”, would you know the answer right away?

No. It doesn’t mean I’ve never done anything bad. It means there was a bit of it and I wouldn’t know what to choose.

Once you take a moral position, can anything be said or done to change your mind?

I don’t think so. I always try to see from both perspectives anyway.

Will you teach your children to believe in Santa?

No children. Not at all.

Outside of work and school, how inclined are you to investigate something that interests you?

Very much so. I’m really dedicated to my interests.

If a blind date used a coupon while paying for dinner, how would you feel?

I wouldn’t even go on a blind date. I don’t see the point.

What’s your opinion concerning strip clubs?

To each their own. Not for me, though.

Imagine that you’re given $1,000,000 and told you must give it to one of the following political causes. Where do you donate the money: right to free speech, right to bear arms, pro-choice causes or anti-abortion causes?

Right to free speech, but none of these is 100% appealing to me.

Could you be in a relationship with someone who had been previously sexually abused?

Sure. I’m that person as well. And even outside that, I’ve never been into sex. I don’t need it in my life and certainly I would understand the pain of my partner, speking from my own experience.

Under the right circumstances, would you allow a partner to lick your anus?

Ew. Ass is for shitting, change my mind.

Is there any aspect of your sexuality that you would be too embarrassed to ever share with a match?

What match? I don’t use dating apps.

Have your sexual interests become kinkier as you’ve grown older?

No. I’ve never had sexual inerests.