#but also so i can force myself to make progress lmao

[therealandian]

there's something really satisfying about going back to work on a project and immediately knowing how to make it better

like i've messed with this story a bit over time, but i never really put a whole lot of thought into the pacing because i just wanted it On The Page

and sure i still haven't written the entire story out yet, but with the rough draft as rough as it is, i think reworking the beginning is going to make things a lot more coherent when i finally do get it all written (and i do have an outline so that helps). cuz wow i breezed through the inciting event with such little substance (around 2k words) which leads to so much expository dialogue in chapter 2 lmao

in the meantime, though, please enjoy this little bit that i pretty much kept word-for-word because it's cute and i love this cat

“Hey there, little guy,” Tayn said, holding out his hand to the tiny black kitten that had materialized in his front garden. It sniffed a few times, tickling his skin with its whiskers, before shoving its whole face into his palm with a happy chirp. He laughed, scritching its cheek while it purred in appreciation. “I don’t have any food to give you right now, sorry.” “Mrrp,” said the cat. “Bit far from town, aren’t you?” “Half an hour's walk for me, but I’m sure it takes you longer.” He stroked the fur on its back. “You’re a pretty tiny little guy.” The cat circled around his legs, weaving beneath them and tickling him with its tail. Then, once it had gone too far for his arm to reach it anymore, it turned around with an indignant Rahh! before pushing its face back into his hand. “You know, I can’t really pet you if you walk away,” Tayn laughed. Its ears twitched, and it squinted at him. Pet me more, human! it seemed to be saying. “You got it, little guy.”

[james-stark-the-writer]

YouTube keeps trying to funnel me into an alt-right pipeline (weirdly through reaction channels in the last few weeks) and i'm so fucking tired. i'm just so fucking tired.

[dilfkuza]

bag obtained, now all there is to do is wait for the pins and keychains to start arriving

[magpod-confessions]

Honestly i wanna hear opinions on season 4, cus im gonna confess i could NOT finish it (didnt move on to season 5 either lol). Got to like ep 135 & i just couldnt tell any of the episodes apart it felt like such a drag; just a slog of misery with some offhand Important 5 Minutes once in a blue moon. I hate repetition & i got the sparknotes from fandom/wiki stuff so yeahhh i just stopped listening; i still love TMA & it’s story & characters, it’s just the execution that got to me RIP

Everything felt kinda forced to me ig? Like there was some shoe-horned “humans are more monstrous than the actual monster” that snuffed S1 Jon’s fun cockiness/jackassery just to make him ? The best one in the archive ??? & all of his wrongdoings are either off-screen or justified by him being tricked into becoming a literal monster against his will (who would STARVE w/o his ‘evil-doings’, which didnt even kill ppl). Also felt like everyone got needlessly dumbed down except for Martin (the Love Interest ofc, who got 180’d from his pre-established incompetency to be some mastermind in a playing field he should have REALLY been inept in) just so they’d be blind to Jon’s situation & be mean to him LMAO

They started trying to make Jon accountable for “choosing this” & i couldnt handle it, held no fucking water to me—the guy being explicitly puppetted & manipulated as the entire plot? That guy is expected to take responsibility here? Felt like some after-thought theme they threw on top of it all. Anyways uhh feel free comment either on what i said and/or your personal thoughts on the season, or nothing if ya got nothing lol

🗣️

Ehh disagree. S4 isnt my fav but I dont think its bad. S1 Jon to s4 jon feels like natural character progression to me. He starts as acting all high and mighty to try hide the fact he has no idea what hes doing and is terrified, and then experiences a lot of ppl dying that he feels is due to him and is his responsibility. At that point his thought pattern is 'I keep messing up and making mistakes and getting myself and everyone around me hurt, so other ppl surely know better'. Hes got a lot of black and white thinking around him, which has been consistent throughout his entire characterization

I dont think any characters were dumbed down either

Melanie was always angry, she only go worse bc she had smth making her think everything she did was justified and when that stopped she became avoidant and stopped lashing out. She was still angry, just managing it better

Basira has always been Daisys no1, the person to justify all of Daisys actions. She knows what daisy did and why its bad but she holds onto the idea that daisy is right in doing so. She blames jon for what he does bc logically she knows its wrong, hurting ppl who havent done anything is wrong, but still excuses daisy bc she needs to. Bc that was a fact of her life and it cannot be wrong. In the unknowning she focuses on facts to keep her grounded and to her 'Daisy is a good person' 'Hurting ppl is wrong' and 'If you hurt ppl you are a bad person' are all facts she needs in her life to stay grounded. How she justifies Daisys actions is by saying that the ppl who daisy hurt were worse and it ultimately helps more ppl to have them gone. Not only can she not do that with Jon, as she believes those he hurts are entirely innocent, she also doesnt care to. Shes not close with Jon and she doesnt have 'Jon is a good person' as a fact in her mind, so she doesnt need to work to excuse his actions. Its all or nothing with her, if you hurt and continue hurting ppl, no matter your reason, you need to stop and the only way you will stop is if you are gone. She also has a lot of black and white thinking, gotta love the autism podcast

Martin being a mastermind in s4 also makes sense bc him being stupid is an act. If ppl think your stupid theyll underestimate you and ultimately leave you alone. They wont scrutinize you, they wont attack every part of you, they will brush it off as just a typical normal thing. It will get you ignored and you cannot be hurt if nobody knows who you are or how to hurt you. Its a lonely miserable existence but its one martins used to. Martin rarely drops the mask of 'Sweet but stupid' bc he needs that to survive and tbh he probably learnt that from needing to survive his mom LOL. Martin just knows and picks the best method of getting ppl to like him, which for him is doing exactly what they want and keeping their expectations low so they wont hurt him as much when they mess up. Honestly in s5 I see him as hes finally got to a place where he doesnt care if everyone hates him, bc he has someone who does and thats all he needs. Hes survived the worst of it and he doesnt care anymore

Part of the reason everyone blames Jon is bc he is there and he is the one who is currently causing the most problems. Also they dont actually see the extent that Jon is manipulated. Elias talks and interacts with Jon differently to how he interacts with others. All of them met Jon when he was already at the institute, they meet him when it does actually look like he made his choice, entirely of his own free will. It doesnt help that daisy is there, someone who completed their transformation like Jon did and turned back on it, and she looks like shes managing well enough. She is surviving without feeding so why cant Jon do the same? Also basira does trust elias on some level. She trusts he knows more than she does and can be an asset if used correctly, which definitely doesnt help things. Also the idea of Elias is locked up, he cant affect Jon anymore so why is Jon still acting this way. Elias has very effectively vilified and isolated jon and jon doesnt fight back against it bc he believes it as well. Other ppl are normally right so why wouldnt everyone be right abt him?

Oh my god that was an essay and I absolutely missed sooo much stuff but idk take that - rosette

i literally have nothing to add . rosette sincerely you are insane and i love that . i honestly don't have a lot of s4 opinions that i could really put down , but i also disagree anon . s4 may not have been the best , but it certainly wasn't Bad or not enjoyable to listen to . coming from someone who has listened to the podcast twice now [ and who is planning on a third relisten ] , i really do enjoy s4 as a whole . martin's buildup and his manipulation of peter lukas is honestly one of my favourite parts , because it has been said that martin was originally going to be apart of the mother of puppets ! this shows that part of martin we didn't get to see but has been there . i got distracted and don't remember what else i was gonna type um . whoops - deceit

[admirxation]

˗ˏˋ admirxation's weekly fic recs ´ˎ˗

!! dark content ahead, please read the warnings the authors have provided, and then continue at your own discretion !!

5th may '24: here are some fics i've collected this week, obviously this is not every single fic but i wanted to give some more spotlight on the ones that literally had me bouncing off the walls lmao. if anyone wants to see more recommendations i have a 'admirxation fic recs' tag if you're ever wanting to read something, and i want to try and do this every Sunday to give some love to creators. i will try to limit this to 10-20, and some weeks might be shorter cuz i don't always have to time. thank you to these creators making these fics and please give them some love

resident evil fics

“If I gotta sin to see her again then I’m gonna lie.” [NSFW] {dad’s boss!Jack Krauser x fem!reader} ~ The reader ends up on their knees for the stranger allowed in their house; starting a fling with her fathers boss.

this was written by @mrswint3rs now i read this a bit ago but i just can’t forget about it. i love krauser content so much like there needs to be more content for this man, i love my pookie leon a feral amount but pookie bear needs to share some spotlight for the other RE guys. i am not embarrassed to admit that i keep rereading this fic, it does something to the brain chemistry. honestly the moment this girl posts more krauser fics im leaping like it’s my last meal cuz AHHHHHHH. the forceful but seductive characterisation that is written within krauser is so memorable and had me blushing and kicking my feet, and to expose myself further the secrecy tropes always get the meter going they are my guilty pleasure.

playing house [NSFW] {stepdad!Leon Kennedy x fem!reader} ~ the readers mother had passed away, leaving Leon and the reader to get closer.

this was written by @miss-oranje-disco-dancer now i always thought i wasn’t into the whole ddlg scene, before anyone things im hating i never gave hate to the concept i was just never apart of the craze if u get me, however, this fic has made me rlly rlly crave ddlg content to the point i’m wondering if the writer laced their words with crack cuz IM SO HOOKED. the gradual progression of the reader and leon is so hot, especially *spoilers for the rest of the fic* when they start sharing a bed dude the tingles i felt, and then the breeding when the reader acts so nonchalant about being bred by leon like YESSIR I NEED THIS MORE THAN ANYTHING.

Playground Love {older!Leon Kennedy x fem!reader} ~ age gap love between reader and Leon.

this was written by @j3llyd0nut . i might have a problem which how much older men fanfics i consume, like gurl its becoming a big problem… that i dont wanna fix oop- this fic doesn’t go into smut (ik what a shocker for me to be recommending something that is straight up porn lmao) but it does deal with age gaps, and i felt the way the writer portrayed it was so well written, especially with the readers’ mothers feelings to it. dating someone older comes with a mix of feelings, the envy was well encapsulated as well as the worry where it is often people try to warn. also the ending quote was such a killer (as an oscar wilde fan hehe… im an english student i love a reference).

Nerd Leon [NSFW] {nerdy!Leon Kennedy x nerdy!fem!reader} ~ Leon and the reader are both virgins who have had a crush on one another.

this was written by @nvoirs (it won’t let me tag them but you have the link to go show them some love). i love lil nerdy leon, he's so cute, especially with the pictures above the fic hehe. honestly the reader is so relatable, the idea of someone asking you out as a joke hahah ive been there too many times, no one can force me back into high school i will claw them. i quite liked the dynamic of them learning together, hehehe it's so so hot and cute at the same time and it deserves so much more love in my humble and very correct opinion.

the last of us fics

older Joel Miller [NSFW] {older!Joel Miller x afab!reader} ~ ft nervous Joel who hasn’t dated in a while and nervous to be with the reader who reassures she wants to be with him.

this was written by @pedroshotwifey and omfg i’m like the biggest simp for joel to the point it’s honestly embarrassing lmao, i feel like they wrote joel quite well and i would imagine if he was to become involved with someone again he would be nervous and be in his head about it; i found the writing of the transition back into sharing physical intimacy really well written and enjoyable, it’s not easy to do that but the author did it so well. my fav joel oneshot.

jujutsu kaisen fics

A proper send off [NSFW] {stepdad!Toji Fushiguro x fem!reader} ~ Toji puts his claim on the reader before she goes to college

this was written by @bratbby333. i feel like i died, like the author put the words on the screen and it make me curl up in a ball and squirming cuz i need toji biblically, and then i died, and then the words brought be back to heaven and then i was bonked and put into horny jail. i’m actually feral for this man. i’m feral for too many fictional men but toji is ughhhhh AHFJFKDKSKSKDDKEKSKW. i loved the descriptions of the reader almost being made for him, or more accurately, Toji making the reader made for him; the description of *SPOILERS* him moulding her pussy for his dick was YUM YUM YUM YUM YUM, i was salivating like fucking homer simpson I NEED IT.

Daddy Issues [NSFW] {stepdad!Toji Fushiguro x fem!reader} ~ reader is a brat whose stopped by her step father Toji

this was written by @nexysworld and my oh my does this girl cook, I AM THE BIGGEST NEXY FAN EVER HEHEHEHEHE. i am a new recruit to the toji fan club and boy oh boy was this the most exciting oneshot to first read after finding my love for this beautiful man. I gotta say the way nexy writes toji is honestly a game changer. like he’s such a jerk that u wanna slap, but i also am enticed by how much of a jerk he is… and perhaps wanna be slapped by him- WHO SAID THAT 👀 damn.

“well, we should probably fuck. Right?” [NSFW] {satoru gojo x fem!reader} ~ reader and gojo are trapped in the prison realm with nothing else to do.

this was written by @kingkonoha. now as we have all learnt about me liking something normally isn’t in my vocabulary; if i like a piece of media best believe im putting my whole soul into it. jjk is a new edition to my fandom endeavours and heheh gojo is my first love, im such a gojo girlie IF ANYONE COMES TO DETROY MY PEACE F OFF LMAO (gojo and toji girlie fr i am). okay if you’re a gojo girlie, kingkonoha’s writing is top tier. i loved the way they encapsulated gojo’s personality, he’s so cocky in this oneshot and ugh i just can’t help but see it so on brand for gojo; also the dirty talk in this fic is like toe curling afhdisosfheisidfhwowjwf I NEED HIM IN A WAY THAT IS CONCERNING TO FEMINISM.

The fanboy guide [NSFW] {satoru gojo x fem!reader} ~ gojo is the readers number one fan and manages to finally meet them in a meet and greet.

this was written by @kingkonoha . i love obsessing over fictional men BUT OH THIS FIC RLLY HAD THE TURNED TABLES. look i dont need anyone judging my likes, i like the idea of someone, especially gojo, obsessing over me and telling me he loves me while i ride him. girlhood = hearing i love you while riding gojo lmao. i love this creator to the point they’re probably fed up on me constantly liking their stuff haha. some bits i wanna point out, the dirty talk was like A* and the way he’s obsessed and basically babbles i love u like AFHFJSWISODODOWKWNEJ this has a chokehold on me and is like feral spray for the gojo girlies to get going lmao.

Tease [NSFW] {satoru gojo x fem!reader} ~ reader teases her sensei over text, and he later shows up at the readers door.

this was written by @dark-and-kawaii . oh look more gojo fics, are we surprised, no rlly cuz he's so hot and ugh i need him so much. i love dirty talk especially sexting it's so hot, but the fact he literally shows up at the door? i was shook but like in a horny way lmao. honestly the jealousy he feels it’s like kinda embarrassing how much i love to imagine someone all jealous over me like hehe tell me how much im in ur mind rent free HAHA. honestly i love this blog, i followed for the bg3 content and stayed for like the absolute talent in every one of their works, so much love <3

i will possess your heart [NSFW] {yandere!satoru gojo x fem!reader} ~ satoru thinks the reader belongs to him and will go any length to make that happen.

this was written by @bratbby333 . okay on this account we love a yandere, the idea of someone being so obsessed that it’s a danger to the lover, themselves and everyone around, A MUST!!!! honestly, it’s kinda baddddd how much i love these yandere oneshots but oh well it’s not like im gonna stop eating this up when everyone fr cooks. i honestly have to say this is the best yandere fic ive seen, like i was fangirling over the author over every word and punctuation they strung together, like huhhhhh it had me on a chokehold throughout it all. the journey of obsession and how far gojo went and his pathway to that was so well written, and the scene with the ex boyfriend and the heart ?!?!?!?! i was literally wide eyed like an owl going “WHAT OMFG”.

to be ex husband [NSFW] {satoru gojo x fem!reader} ~ ex bf gojo comes back in readers life and asks for a hand in marriage.

this was written by @arminsumi . lmao this fic made me have so many emotions. first of all, SHOKO MY BELOVED IS MY BESTIE I LOVE SHOKO. but the idea of gojo being an ex cuz he was a play boy i was like hmmm f u man, breaking my heart (like bruh i was so offended like i actually was the reader to the point i was like bruh i have to calm down) and then after when he’s getting all giggly with suguru im like hehehehe let the fucking commence i need me some gojo action. honestly this fic has an amazing balance of oooo this is sexy, to feelings of being a lil mad, but also comedic moments. it honestly encaptures gojo’s character so well, i was rlly impressed. also i didn’t know how much i needed someone to ask for marriage while fucking ahe

[justajsworkshop]

I feel like I am stuck because all I care about is manifesting what I want. I see blogs talk about taking time to know SELF but all I want is my desires. does this sound stupid😭 I think this makes things hard for me, I don't feel like I'm at a point in my journey where I want to delve too deep into this. I know it would come eventually but right now, I just want to get out of the situations I am in😭

hey, anon. breathe, breathe, breathe. you're doing ok. you're going to be ok. i promise, i promise. okay, so i'm going to give you some advice/thoughts here like i would to anyone else—like i would to a friend or myself even.

to preface, you do not have to take any of it. so, take that pressure off now that this is scripture lmao. just consider what i'm saying as an alternative perspective on where you're at—from someone who's so been there and is kinda there now at times, ngl—and take what's helpful for you, discard what isn't!

k, so first, let me start by saying you don't have to get deep into the law. i know my blog might sometimes make it seem like you need to, but you don't. i just do because i've been curious about consciousness and god, so it brings me immense pleasure to learn more. there are people out there who just affirm themselves to death, and that works for them without even taking other stuff into account. like, you don't have to put that pressure on yourself to be a philosopher, frfr. that's not a condition/requirement for you to get what you want.

i also want to say that it's okay for you want things to be different for you. in fact, i'm HAPPY you do. because that means you don't want to settle for what you're currently experiencing. so, don't demonize yourself either for wanting a different life/experience. that in and of itself is worthy of celebration. i remember going through terrible experiences and not even allowing myself to want more because i truly thought there was no other option for me than to endure awful conditions.

next, i'm going to invite you to literally just forget about the law and trying to manifest. it's clearly stressing you out, so i would advise to anyone that if it's not benefitting you—and i can tell you've really been trying—let it go for a bit. the law will always be here and working, and you will always be god/consciousness. however, in my experience, when i try manifesting my way out of a situation, i get so fixed on resisting that very situation, i continue to do nothing but breathe life into it.

to be honest, i recommend just taking a moment today or this weekend or whenever you're ready to get clear on your goal. what do you want? what's your ideal? then (and please don't crucify me for this), i invite you to get practical about what next steps you can take that will help alleviate the pressure you're feeling and that will help move you toward your goal. small steps add up. i understand and absolutely empathize with the desire for your life to transform overnight. it can; it absolutely can. but not from the state of waiting for the law to save you.

am i saying work hard? no. am i saying hustle and force yourself to do stuff you hate? no. am i saying the only way to get your desires is through 3D action? no. so, if your ego is going bonkers and spitting fire at me, really digest what i'm suggesting here.

get clear on what you want: one area of improvement that you'd like to alchemize.

what's one step you can and are willing to take today to move yourself toward that goal?

i say this because sometimes it's the best way to get out of your victim/waiting mentality, and then suddenly, all this other stuff opens up because you're not waiting for a miracle. you become the miracle.

if you want me to be your accountability buddy, you're welcome to keep me updated on your progress, too!

[saccharinescorpion]

oh christ i typed up way too many thoughts about the Teal Mask story

spoilers of course

TO BEGIN WITH literally everything here has a big ol’ asterisk with “subject to change” attached to it, i was surprised at how much of a “to be continued” ending the main story had and i’m trying not to get my hopes too high for Indigo Disk, but wowzers

Carmine’s line about tourism… i have a lot of feelings, but the one looming over my head like a fucking sword of Damocles is “did the writers not intend this to have as much weight as i am ascribing to it lmao” because it’s only the one line and GOD i don’t want to be the “reading too much into stories for babies” person all the time but!! But!!!!

(recalls the scene where Nemona talks to you about feeling isolated because of her talent and recalls my feeling of “why was this only in one scene where she flatout looks at the camera and says this”)

well even if it’s not supposed to be “that” important-

1) sure makes the TCG Tournament in Hawaii feel even more bitterly ironic lmao (obligatory yes i know the game writers are not responsible for most stuff that happens in the wider franchise i’m just SAYING it’s ironic)

2) GOSH it sure does make those ugly jokes people kept making about Carmine even grosser than they already were (if you don’t know what i’m talking about, Don’t Worry About It)

As someone on twitter said it feels weird to have this sort of plot point after not exploring it at all in the game with the Hawaii analogue. at the same time i do have to wonder if it was a response to working on those games and doing some thinking. Who can say

God ALL of that was for one line

KIERAN!! Okay, i know i’ve been giving Kieran a lot of shit but his plot progression is genuinely very compelling. recent games have been exploring the “rival who feels inadequate” type of character but this is the first time one has gone off the deep end like this, and i really hope they push it into interesting places

Cutesy shy “oh gosh oh wowzers” pre-development Kieran… in the end i did feel a bit charmed by how sincere he is for the record!

but also i’m genuinely so glad he ended up having Inner Darkness lol

Sorry Kieran i just don’t like it when it feels like the writer is trying way too hard to make me say “i want to protect you”

By extension sorry Wally lmao because he really was the ancestor of this type in the Pokemon franchise

I tried not to take the fact that i really didn’t want the damn Ogerpon too personally lol, this is one of those moments where i really had to force myself to step back and remember that these games are not for me, they are for tiny children who often really do buy into the Gotta Catch Em All thing and probably felt some genuine inner turmoil at this

But god like, please. I have my giant puppy lizard who makes vroom vroom noises. Ogerpon you are so cute but we can never have the bond i have with my bike

Kieran falling to his knees after the last battle genuinely got me, so did him punching the shrine even with the dumb “owie ><” gag afterwards

OKAY talking about the battles damn Kieran and Carmine were tough opponents i had to try Kieran’s last fight like three times (admittedly because i was using my weaker Kitakami team but STILL)

Kieran feeling bad for the ogre was projecting “THIS CHARACTER FEELS LIKE AN OUTCAST” and i picked that up loud and clear, and that was good, but i wish they actually… made him seem like an outcast?

Don’t get me wrong, Kieran definitely has self-confidence issues, issues with talking to others, anxiety issues (possibly), and that can easily make someone feel like an outcast

But i feel like there’s a big difference between that and someone (Ogerpon and her trainer) who is actively shunned and mistreated by the people around them, and i was really hoping for that from Kieran

It’s just the Pokemon thing of finding it hard to depict people really being actively malicious (see Penny and Team Star’s bullies and their enablers all doing their thing off-screen and then leaving off-screen)

But it’s doubly weird because they didn’t have much issue with showing characters in this story being terrible (Carmine)

Carmine!!! Her terribleness was genuinely so entertaining, a lot of the time i was simultaneously laughing and thinking “oh people are going to be SO mad”

But real talk for all my love of Girls Who Suck i do actually kind of get where some people are coming from, she is genuinely very abrasive and unpleasant at times, and though i don’t agree at least i can tell where the character hate is stemming from (unlike some of the absolute batshit stuff i saw about Geeta and Nemona, don’t get me staaaarted)

And speaking of… okay i feel like i’m pushing it even talking about this but i feel it would be dishonest to pretend that i’m not thinking about it

SOOOO the “it’s not like i hit him” line… another case of “did the writers intend this to be as big as it is in my mind,” combined with uhhh writers from a different generation than me, let’s say

For now i will interpret that at face value, but like… damn, i don’t think that reads as you want it to especially in a Pokemon game

Carmine pleaseeeeeee say you’re sorry to Kieran in Indigo Disk please please please i know she apologized for leaving him in the dark but my dearest dream is for her to apologize for being so mean to him all the time. she needs to just treat him better in general. please i will forgive Kieran having to apologize for taking the mask if we can do this please

I know i know cultural differences but we already had Clavell apologize for the failures of the school system, this isn’t THAT big of  a stretch

I am genuinely curious if Indigo Disk will pull a reverse plot twist and reveal Ogerpon’s trainer to be a bad person or reveal that he was the one to attack the Loyal Three first because if not DAMN we’re just going to have some flat out evil Pokemon? that we can potentially put on a team with Ogerpon?????

Ogerpon is a silly lil girl :)

I still haven’t done Perrin’s plot lol

[fonulyn]

got tagged by @goodpointsandbadpoints and @silvercap so here we go :3

When did you start writing?

really depends on the definition of writing, but i've been writing stories in notebooks from the moment i actually learned to write. the first one i remember was about a friend group of dogs going on adventures lol. it was nine notebooks long and my poor teacher was too nice to say no so he had to read it all.

Are there different themes or genres you enjoy reading than what you write?

I enjoy historical fiction but I don't have the patience for the research it'd require so I won't write it. uhm. idk I read various genres but I basically only write fluffy fic so :'D i do have a fantasy project in finnish but i haven't touched it in years, so idk if it counts.

Is there a writer you want to emulate or get compared to often?

no. I love reading different styles, and I've learned a lot from just reading authors who have very different ways of saying what they want to say. but I don't want to emulate any of them. I will do what feels organic to me.

Can you tell me a bit about your writing space?

usually on my couch in front of the tv with the laptop on my lap lol. I don't really write by hand or on my phone unless it's a random idea I need to jot down quick and I'm not on my laptop then. the tv is always on, i need the background noise.

What's your most effective way to muster up a muse?

lmao well that is the million dollar question, isn't it. usually going for a walk with the dog or on a longer car ride alone helps, it forces me to spin things in my brain bc there's nothing else to do. (but it can also backfire and I spiral into never wanting to write again lol) inspiration strikes at very random moments tbh. i haven't yet found much rhyme or reason in that.

Are there any recurring themes in your writing? Do they surprise you?

at the core, it's always about love and acceptance, learning to receive it, or craving it and not getting it. self-worth. loneliness. finding your support system. idk in general I am happy with my life but I do get lonely often and it shows, because if I can't get a good cuddle from someone who loves me then damnit the character i'm writing about sure as hell will get it! :'D

What is your reason for writing?

there are stories inside of me that need a way out.

How do you want to be thought about by your readers?

uhm. I want them to feel the feelings i'm trying to get across with my words. connect with the characters. and enjoy the story I want to tell.

What do you feel is your greatest strength as a writer?

characterization and dialogue. soft moments where people connect. pacing, usually. hm.

How do you feel about your own writing?

i don't care how selfish this sounds lmao they're the stories i want to read and i love them. simple as that. i give me exactly what i want :'D

When you write, are you influenced by what others might enjoy reading, or do you write purely for yourself, or a mix of both?

so this is my biggest weakness when it comes to writing because i can not write only for myself. i can't be a "desk drawer writer" (like the saying goes in finnish lol). that is precisely why I haven't made any progress with my fantasy trilogy (lol) in finnish in years and years, because no one i know wants to read it (fantasy is not their genre, no shade to them). i need an audience, even if it's just one person! but at the same time i am not willing to budge on what i think makes a good story lol. so in a way i do write what makes me happy but to find the motivation to finish things i'd also need to find someone who gives a crap.

but anyway.

not tagging anyone, do it if you feel like it and say i tagged you! ;)

[musashi]

As a creative, how do you keep going? I see you making fanfics, videos, art, gifs, sitting down and learning something new just because you wanted to. I've always had such a hard time turning ideas into actual finished pieces. At first i thought it was fear of failing but I've been tackling that for years but the progress I've made its still not enough. I've tried doing it "just for fun", for personal growth, for money, as part of a community. Hell, I've tried out of spite. Please, how do keep creating?

that's a tough one because it really is about getting to the bottom of what is stopping you, and it sounds like you've done a lot of work on that with little results. thats gotta be frustrating!

i can tell you that for me, i feel fully fucking crazy when i do not create. this is not as much the case anymore, but when i was younger i felt like the ideas were trapped inside me and that holding them in was literally making me sick. i created because i had to or i felt physically bad.

i had a huge sprawling story in my head for YEARS tho and i had to get it out. and i wasn't. and back when i wasn't it was because i was depressed. depression for me feels like a lazy sunday that never ends, like i can't do anything, like i am locked in my own body and the only thing i have the energy to do is scroll social media for short-term dopamine.

but when i eventually decided ok, this is it, time to tell my story, what fixed me was seeing it like a job instead of a passion. for YEARS i had been fed this lie about "inspiration" and "motivation" and "writer's block" and now i am fully 100% of the belief that all of those concepts are bullshit lmao. i straightup do not believe in them any longer. i believe they are shields that creatives hide behind to absolve themselves of the guilt and frustration they feel when they are not creating.

in the end for me it just came down to this: once a week, it was time to write. no ifs ands or buts about it. at a set hour, on a set day, i would write for a set amount of time. and i could either make fucking hemingway or the worst collection of sentences known to man, but i HAD to write. i was not allowed to talk myself out of it. so that is what i did.

now, years later, looking back on all of my work--i could not tell you what i wrote when i felt "inspired" and what i wrote when i didn't. it all just looks the same to me, and most of it is pretty damn good.

i no longer write once a week. i write every day now. set times. set moments. sometimes alone. sometimes with friends. but every day, when it is time to write, no matter how i am feeling, i write.

currently i am also trying to get medicated for my ADHD so that focus doesn't feel so much like pulling teeth! that is also something i am excited to pursue more and see if it helps. but tl;dr my process is brute force and a schedule.

here is a little more i have said on the subject. i am sorry if it's not helpful, but maybe you will find something in my story that lines up with your own.

[n7punk]

“Make Me a Monster” Fic Notes

MMaM was pretty short and this will be too but this fic has some Backstory and I wanna talk about it lmao.

Playlist:

Warriors (AJ Michalka version)

heavy. — Au/Ra

The Creeps — Garbage

LIFE AFTER SALEM — Lil Nas X

The Heartless (original rock version) — PVRIS (kind of hard to get. Was only available on their PARIS EP which isn’t available for streaming last I checked)

Waking Up (Acoustic) — PVRIS (from the acoustic version of the PARIS EP, which is available on youtube)

chaotic — Tate McRae

Hate myself — Tate McRae

R.E.M. — Mothica

Shatter — Against The Current

Frankenstein — Rina Sawayama

My Limb — Hayley Williams

Epilogue Life:

It takes awhile and I could never write this fic in a timespan where it’s complete, but Adora does come to accept her new prosthetics. After the revelations about She-ra and the Heart, she comes to realize this version of them is the most ideal she could get purely because they don’t need maintenance, removal, cleaning etc and she can care for them the exact way she can the rest of her body, which makes them feel a lot more like her body. Her sense of touch isn’t 100%, still losing some texture differentiation and the ability to really feel light touches (she wouldn’t feel a bug walking on her arm for example), but as shown in the epilogue she learns to adapt, and eventually she stops covering up so much either. When she starts to wear her jacket less is when Catra knows she has made real progress. Her prosthetics are magic and never need intervention, which helps.

On Catra’s part, her guilt also takes a lot to process, as does her trauma from her time chipped, which only feeds into her guilt because she feels like she inflicted that same dehumanization on Adora. She comes to focus her energy on “fixing” things instead though, which does lead to some unhealthy burnout, but the worry her friends show for her then does a lot to help her internalize that no, they really don’t hate her.

It’s one of those cases where they take longer to get to a healthy place than in canon, but they do eventually reach it. They get through the worst of it early on, but those effects echo for a long time.

Chapter 1:

⦁ I was pretty worried going into this how people would feel about this, mostly because it’s an incredibly complex situation. Prosthetics are often helpful, but they tend to not be as effective as people hope and even when they are, that still doesn’t mean people don’t look at them and see what they lost sometimes. This situation in particular, where the prosthetics were largely unnecessary and completely forced on her, was painful. Adora is struggling not just with that, but with the very familiar process of trying to get back where she was before an injury/disability, but sometimes that’s just not possible. She’s seeking every piece of functionality and feeling she gets with her prosthetics, but that doesn’t mean she is less for having lost something either. I was worried about people thinking that attitude she has is ableist, when it’s really just a part of the disabled experience. Some people never have it, but I’m definitely someone who has struggled with trying to get things back while knowing I’ll never get it all. It… really sucks, and even when things seem good, there can be a bittersweetness to them. That’s the kind of attitude I was approaching this fic with. There was also the medical abuse angle with her prosthetics. Despite her impossibly advanced prosthetics, this is a very real thing I actually saw conversations about when TotK came out, which is what gave me of the exact phrase for that trigger because I was having trouble naming/describing it in the content warning before that.

⦁ Hordak was working on prosthetic limbs in the event that his deteriorating state made it impossible for him to keep working, using Adora as his guinea pig to test their effectiveness. Shadow Weaver kind of thought there was a chance She-ra could regrow them entirely even if that wasn’t what she was banking on. She actually thought the second accident was a mercy, because Hordak already wanted to test out the set on Adora at that point, so making it “necessary” was supposed to be easier on Adora. Her empathy meter is broken.

Chapter 2:

⦁ Catra just can’t “get” why Adora stayed, but it was kind of impossible for her to leave before that. Part of her already knew Shadow Weaver would be back for more, but she couldn’t let herself do it because it was the “wrong” thing to leave Etheria to the princesses. When she realized the Rebellion wasn’t actually monsters, it was all so much worse because she realized everything — her arms, Catra’s punishments, the horrible way they grew up that she didn’t even really have perspective for — had been for nothing. Catra was right all along. They should have runaway. So she did

⦁ I didn’t intend to title the chapters of this fic since it was so short, but then the “You promise?” line came up and I wanted to make that the chapter title for clarification purposes if nothing else, so I added them in.

Chapter 3:

⦁ I know I’m kind of the “let’s talk about traumatized Catra” person but tbh I still don’t think we give enough weight to having your body literally puppeted while you watch and undergo nightmare hallucinations. Like how the fuck was she functioning after that. So yeah on top of Adora being extra traumatized in this (and Catra additionally having extra trauma from watching that happen), I wanted to go a bit into the echoes of having been under Horde Prime’s control for Catra too. (Other members of the Princess Alliance who were chipped definitely deal with nightmares from this too, but I have a feeling the nightmare scenarios were mostly unique to Catra, especially considering the green pool wasn’t used on the others and by the time Prime had the others under his control he was dealing with a lot of chips and conjuring up nightmare scenarios for them all doesn’t make sense.)

⦁ In this AU there was a lot more immediately obvious awfulness from Shadow Weaver, so even after the portal Glimmer did keep her confined to her room, not that it helped Adora’s mental state much. She was a lot more hated and shunned in Bright Moon and when they were on the run. Catra and Adora still cried watching her die, but after the fact their general attitude is a mixture of “good riddance” and “how could she do all that to us and then just die without ever acknowledging it?” They take her sacrifice as the closest thing they’ll ever guilt to an admission of feeling guilt.

⦁ The thing about Adora never being able to tell if her sensation is back to “normal” is a very real thing when it comes to disability. I remember at one point telling a friend that I couldn’t tell if I wasn’t in pain or was just shouldering it because I didn’t remember what not being in pain felt like anymore.

⦁ If you know my poll, this was “in the engine room.”

Chapter 4:

⦁ In this AU, they have no idea the First Ones Virus could infect She-ra with just the sword since it seemed “obvious” it spread from the robots, to the sword, to her prosthetics, which somehow caused everything to go haywire. Because she was working with her original set that was less advanced, the virus was legitimately latched onto She-ra itself, which also explains why it went away with she reverted the transformation. They just thought changing “bodies” let her purge the virus when she transformed back. The corruption from the First Ones… worm, thing, corrupted Adora’s limbs similarly to how the virus took over her, only with green instead of red, completely changing the colors of her arms and legs and then slowly creeping up her veins. It was gnarly.

⦁ Entrapta just has a better connection with Catra and was looking to her for an answer, but a small incline of the head was their signal back in the Horde that she should really just agree with whoever she’s talking with. She almost never paused to notice it, but Catra was trying her best (and failing) to keep her out of trouble.

Original Outline:

Originally this AU was supposed to be longer, starting when Adora first lost her limbs, then skimming through scenes throughout the series, until finally landing on Darla. That was just an extra 2-3 chapters probably, but 1) god that’s too much angst. It kept me from writing it for like 9 months because I didn’t want to do it, 2) the balance just wasn’t there? Everything got “minute-to-minute” once they were on Darla, with entire chapters dedicated to it, where as the previous chapters were scattered moments taking place over literal years. This did mean I lost some ideas that were supposed to take place in the war and such (the princess prom scene, for example), but it’s still better for it.

I started to write that longer version of it back in 2022(!) but only worked on it for two days to about 2k before I was like this is not vibing and dropped it. When I picked it back up with the shorter timeline in mind, I wrote 70% of this fic in one sitting back in September, but then I got kind of stuck on their reconciling conversation and I think it was just a little too much angst for me then so I didn’t come back to it the next day. I’ve opened it occasionally since then to glance over but it just wasn’t clicking until this week. I edited what I had and wrote the rest of the fic in two days once I was there, though. I am proud of this fic but it’s definitely a very emotional one so it kind of has to happen in bursts like that. I’m glad to have finally gotten it out now, as rocky as getting from idea to completion was. I had the idea November 14th 2022, wrote most of it September 4th 2023, and finally finished it March 9th 2024.

Upcoming:

Start Your Engine ;)

[assorted-candy]

20 Q's for Fic Writers

I got tagged by @dp-marvel94! Thank you!

1. How many works do you have on Ao3? 

I've just posted my 22nd work a few days ago!

2. What's your total Ao3 word count?

37,763

3. What fandoms do you write for?

So far, all my published fics are for Danny Phantom. It's a fandom that's near and dear to my heart and my favorite to write for. I've written fanfiction for myself in a lot of different fandoms over the years. Miraculous Ladybug, Mega Man (Star Force, Battle Network) and Fire Emblem are a few. (Will these ever see the light of day? Probs not, lol)

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?  5. Frayed Ends - 37 kudos - Jazz and Maddie are fighting more often. Jack wants to reach out and help his family. 4. The Same Blood - 45 kudos - Maddie and Jack try to help a sick girl that collapsed in front of their house. They don't know what to make of her condition. Danny wants to help.

3. Returned Home - 49 kudos - Maddie finds Danny at home after he disappeared ten months ago.

2. The Broken Pieces Left Behind - 66 kudos (tie) - Maddie knew what the portal did to Danny. If she could create something that essentially turned him into a ghost, she could figure out a way to fix all of it. Even if she hasn't made any progress in the past two months, she'll keep trying. She didn't account for what Danny wanted. 1 . What's Out of Out Control - 66 kudos (tie) - Danny thought he had it under control. He thought he could finally hang out like they used to always do. Tucker could feel the rift between them widening. It wasn't getting smaller anytime soon.

5. Do you respond to comments?

I try to! There were a few comments from my two earlier fics that I never responded to and it's already been so long and I feel like I ended up putting it off too long to say anything now 😓But I'm so so thankful for all the comments I receive! I never thought anyone would read my work, let alone comment on it. I'm always between two modes of 'author commentary' and 'screaming thank you and running away'.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Lol, I love my angsty stuff and there are so many different flavors of angst, so it's hard to pick just one. I'd say the piece I aimed to write for Angst Fest, The Broken Pieces Left Behind, might be it. It ends on a rather hopeless note for the Fenton family that even I don't know how to make everything better for them

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Probably Home for a Cat. It was for a Ectoberhaunt prompt that I was absolutely stumped on. So I decided someone was going to adopt a cat by the end of the fic.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Ahh, so I actually posted a fic on FFN wayyy back when I was in high school. I remember it being received pretty well but I got a really rude comment on a simple spelling mistake. Back then, I was just told I had dyslexia a few years prior and I had some really bad self-esteem issues tied in with that. So, yeah, that comment basically made me terrified to ever show my work to anyone ever.

It's been over ten years since then and I wanted to actually get over that fear. I impulsively decided to do Angst Fest with the mindset that no one would even look at what I posted. Not only did people look, everyone has been so kind!!!

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

lkdajldkf, nope. I get flustered trying to write basic romance and having two characters hold hands, lmao. Major props to those that can, it's definitely a skill that takes time to master just like any other genre.

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

I haven't.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Also haven't had this either.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Nope, but it seems like a lot of fun.

14. What's your all-time favourite ship?

Back when the show was airing, Amethyst Ocean (Danny/Sam) was my go to. I'm a sucker for friends to lovers tropes and it's really nostalgic for me. But, I don't really read a lot of shippy things for Danny Phantom, so ships don't make or break a fic for me.

If I'm looking to read romance, the whole Love Square (MariChat my beloved) with Miraculous Ladybug will always be great. Even if I jumped ship on the show around season 2 or 3 and I have no clue what they're doing now, lol.

15. What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

I honestly have so many WIPs that are unfinished on my computer from over the years. Maybe a super old one that I titled 'Phantoms in the Daylight'. Angst once more with Character Death as the main pain point. I like the beginning but oh boy, does it get sloppy and confusing real quick. I'd need serious outlining energy put into it if I'd ever want to salvage it and I just don't have it in me.

16. What are your writing strengths?

Dialogue! Give me two blorbos and I'll make them talk forever.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Scenery and description. I love the dialogue portion so much that I end up running into the floating heads in an empty room problem in the first drafts of my fics. My first round of edits are dedicated to making sure I have a scene and grounding characters into it. And then I have to go back later to make it not feel so robotic sounding.

(Also a weakness but more as in fic than writing. Summaries and Titles. I stare at my drafts on AO3's editor for at least half an hour trying to pull something together, lol)

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

I can probably talk about this for hours, lol. I absolutely love foreign languages, especially when it comes to linguistics. So, I'll try to be brief, lmao. Short answer: depends on the fic but normally no. I already spend so much time fussing over the word choice/slang/formality/dialect characters use in my native language. I don't have a good enough grasp on another language for it to sound natural to the reader. ("They would not fucking say that" is my internal monologue during dialogue edits, lol)

19. First fandom you wrote for?

It's a toss up between Pokemon and Danny Phantom. I first learned about fanfiction from a friend who showed me FFN for the Pokemon fics. I looked around the site and found all of the Danny Phantom fics soon after and got hooked on those. I started writing around then and it would have been for one of those two.

20. Favorite fic you've written?

Hard to chose one! Writing technicality wise, I'm proud of how What Remains on the Table turned out. I consider description my weak point, so the original draft was 0 dialogue with very stiff descriptions. I was able to edit it to really practice my environmental storytelling. (Although, please mind the tags if you click the link as it does deal with the dissection topic)

I'm not sure who's been tagged and I'm not sure who writes fanfic, so @lavendarlily, @fangirlwriting-stories, @grub-xd, @nanaarchy and anyone else that wants to join!

[freeuselandonorris]

yes and smth else that comforts me in my own personal fitness journey is seeing that even for male athletes it takes them years of working out to achieve a certain physique —even with 24/7 dedicated staff, personal diet plans, and a whole career modeled around their bodies/fitness. If even for them it takes years and years, imagine for “normal” people!

👏 say it louder!!! i think this is such a toxic mindset that a lot of people are indoctrinated into through no fault of their own thanks to bullshit capitalism and influencers and the industrial wellness complex, this idea that you can just drink flat tummy tea or do a couple pilates sessions a week and you’ll magically have 10% body fat and abs of steel. and then it’s SO fuckin demoralising when you don’t! and then it’s so easy to spiral into hating yourself and perceiving yourself as weak or a failure, or punishing yourself.

historically i have had a bad bad bad relationship w my body that culminated in a relatively bad eating disorder in my late teens. it’s taken me years and years to get past that mindset (i still had to ask my PT to not tell me my scale weight this morning) but the biggest eye-opener was when i did start working out regularly and building my strength, and realised that even though my body felt transformed in terms of what it can handle, it a) doesn’t look that much different bc I haven’t cut alongside it and b) it takes SO much longer than you realise to change your body sustainably and healthily. it’s been three years for me and i’m only now starting to see/feel genuine progress, and that’s why i’ve started with a trainer bc i’m at the point now where i want guidance and i want to be pushed. but even that is a bigggg financial commitment (with gym, pole studio and PT i’m spending over £300 a month which is not small change for me!!) and it’s required me to make lifestyle sacrifices and changes even to see small payoffs. but i’m at the point now where i’m doing it bc i’m loving the process rather than forcing myself thru it for results, which is the biggest and best change for me even more than having slightly more hench shoulders

SORRY this was an absolute essay you didn’t ask for lmao but i feel very passionate about this!!

side note i’m also desperate to write an essay about the congruities between kink (esp BDSM) and strength training but i fear that one may have to be worked out thru fic at some point

[satubby]

Hello! How are you? I love your account you earned one more followers! I wanted to make a request if it is not too much to ask. Can you be sfw and nsfw headcanons (in a romantic relationship) with Makima in the male version of her? please! I really would like you to attend to my request and I hope you have a good day.

[Note: Am I dreaming? Why if that's the case... don't wake me up, AHHHH!!!! ♡♡♡ Thanks for asking, I rarely (ever) get this and I'm grateful. I hope you like what I wrote because I was lazy to finish the drawing that I had originally planned. I leave you a chibi that I did in the genshin impact style LMAO]

Well it depends on where you are in your relationship. Unlike Makima, Makime is more openly seductive and is not afraid to use his charm, he is very self-centered about it.

Since I'm based on my fanfic, Makime is your boss in the fourth section of public security and you usually see him but try to stay out of it while hanging out with the boys.

Since you asked for headcanons, I'll go two ways, first I'll do the SFW and then the NSFW because I want to dedicate more time to that one since I suck writing intimate acts.

Tokens of appreciation:

Makime would show her appreciation in a peculiar and somewhat twisted way at worst. He could offer eloquent compliments and sweet flattery, but always with a hidden agenda. His words may be framed in lies and manipulations, it is likely that he seeks to obtain something in return, for example... Your entire disposition and love for him.

If you are at the beginning of the relationship, he would seek to attract you with simple gifts that you would not expect from him, for example: Roses, money or bonuses from your salary. Well, he knows you don't trust him.

If you are already more confident, he could show his appreciation through such simple acts as leaving you with less workload or pairing you up with him so you don't endanger yourself on more important missions [Which is more of an excuse to keep an eye on you and silently study you in case that he still did not declare his love openly]. He would be constantly watching over you, making sure you were safe and removing any perceived threats [Whether he was actually dangerous to you or just out of jealousy].

Makime might offer quirky and unique gifts that reflect her knowledge of your likes and interests. However, these gifts could be more manipulative than genuine intent. Sometimes just looking for a reaction from you, whether positive or not, he just wants you to pay attention.

You are really confused by their actions, sometimes you feel compelled to accept their gifts, good or bad.

Romance type:

The romance with Makime would be an emotional roller coaster. Spending time with him could be exciting and exciting, but also dangerous and exhausting. His cunning and manipulative personality would create an intense dynamic, full of mind games at the worst. Well, since I'm basing myself on the events of my Fanfic: A peach between apples, you constantly doubt the intentions of the red-haired demon since you know its nature from its original version, Makima.

Makime would seek to maintain absolute control in the relationship, although he would secretly like to have sweet moments without forcing you to participate in them, but it will only happen when he is sure that you will not let him. He can be possessive and jealous, showing his darker side if he feels you are slipping out of his control or if you have been a brat to him.

The romance with Makime, as I said, is quite nuanced and since he doesn't know the feeling of human-style love, he grew up in isolation [I guess?] He could make you feel uncomfortable without meaning to but he's still a son of a bitch, so he doesn't care about your reactions a lot, he just wants to see you nervous and/or any other emotion, you're interesting.

He would always be hiding parts of himself and revealing little clues as the relationship progresses or that he already has the certainty that you will not betray him, that you will be his completely. These secrets and gradual revelations could lead to a complicated and ambiguous emotional connection since you don't fully understand their actions.

At times Makime can be cold and insensitive to your feelings, but when he's jealous or vulnerable, he drops his cunning and prideful facade, to be twistedly soft on you. Their gifts in these cases would be more intimate, giving you things that they know you like. In his strange and sadistic way, he gives you someone's heart or kills in front of you, which leaves you quite traumatized because it is not pretty to see someone literally explode or see how their insides turn inside out (that is, the skin and organs come out of the inside ). These cases only occur when he is in a bad mood or wants to punish you.

Types of names and nicknames that Makime uses with you:

Makime's nicknames towards you influence his impressions, at the beginning of meeting you she would call you little employee or lamb, because in his eyes you look like a nervous lamb in front of its predator.

As they are already closer or in a relationship that is not [clearly if] forced, he would call you: Little doll, little rabbit or puppy.

In cases where he is in a bad mood, he usually uses demeaning names like: Pet, my prize, Dumb human or needy bitch [but these last names are more in the NSFW context].

Particularly when he is feeling most intimate and vulnerable, he often calls you my treasure, love (if not very creative) angel or princess.

You walked the streets of Tokyo, checking your makeup and everything. Makime had summoned you for something, with the control demon you never knew what he would do next or even his intentions towards you. You saw makime sitting down having a coffee, you approached him by sitting on it and adjusting the wrinkles in your clothes.

"Makime-san.... Did you need me for something? Normally I don't expect you to invite me to these types of places without it being for celebration or work reasons, your invitation and interest in me really surprises me" You said something nervous but trying to hide your discomfort or worst case scenario, those many doubts that run in your mind about this situation.

Makime looked at his glass of espresso as if it were interesting, only making you more uncomfortable at his non-response. Then he smiled widely and looked at you, what you didn't know is that this was just an excuse to spend time with you. He could practically see you anywhere and yet he preferred moments like these even if they weren't (if they are) forced. But he just wants alone time without those jerks following you around like roaches attached to food.

The redhead comes out of his thoughts about Aki, Powa and Denji turning to you again looking at you with an amused and calm smile while those piercing golden eyes follow your movements from head to toe, scrutinizing you.

"Sure... *Sigh*, you're kind of right, I invited you for a coffee, there's no problem with that... so just relax and don't try to see the devil's horn in everything, okay?" Here a sip of his coffee, while he smiles, that fucking smile that just gets on your nerves, you notice that he gives you an aura of great power when he sits near you, you start to wonder if there is something else he wants.

You don't want to be by his side, you hate even looking at him because you feel constantly violated and exposed, you hate the feeling and the bastard knows it, he enjoys getting nervous like you can't imagine.

"Makime-san, if you only called me for this I see no point in staying..." You were getting hysterical, you wanted to hit him even if it meant getting killed in the process, you still got up bowing and starting to leave. Yeah If you stayed longer, you wouldn't know whether to hit them out of irritation or the simple fact of wasting your time. Damn, you never understood their actions and that frustrates you, it's like a game of egos between tug and pull.

It wasn't until hands bigger than your arm grabbed you tightly, giving you a sharp twist, making you collide with the redhead's chest. Your face pressed against his chest, feeling the beating of his heart, although thinking about it more thoroughly you didn't know if it was just the sound he imitated to avoid raising suspicions. The breath on the helix¹ of your ear as you inevitably turned red. Instinctively you wanted to push him but he held you tighter in his arms as he whispered your name loving that blush coming from you.

You see him with a calm look, not knowing that you are telling him what he wants to hear: Those beats in your chest indicating that he was the cause of these... No one else and that puts him in a better mood.

With calm eyes, he looks at your lips and back into your eyes, he comes a little closer to you, caresses your cheek tenderly and looks at you with a more intense look. This only makes the knot in your stomach that has been building up for these few minutes increase and become more tangled like the spaghetti you ate yesterday for dinner.

"I just want to see you by my side. Isn't that enough for you?" He says with a sweet and seductive voice, he smiles a little at you, but his golden eyes look at you intensely with mixed emotions. You know that everything has an intention behind it and you don't want to give in to his whims.... But God!!, how you wanted to keep looking and admit that despite being a son of a bitch and a cunning manipulator, he's damn attractive.

You continued to stare at Makime, trying to figure out his true intentions. You felt a mixture of tension and longing inside of you, fighting against your own contradictory feelings. His closeness and his caresses disturbed you, but at the same time they attracted you in a way that you could not help.

"I don't know if that's enough for me," you replied with a shaky voice, trying to keep your guard up. "There are still many things I don't understand about you, Makime-san. I can't just get carried away by your sweet words and gestures. I don't trust you completely and we barely speak to each other."

He looks at you with a 'kind' smile on his lips and sees that his eyes become duller than usual, you avoid looking at them any longer with an insecure look, he knows you're nervous but you don't let him see everything.

"Trust takes time, you will give it to me sooner or later, you will have no other choice"

His gaze only pierces yours and his eyes remain that hypnotic golden color with those rings in them, hypnotizing you and he begins to caress your thigh with his hand.

Then as if something bewitched both of them, their lips slowly approached and he kisses your lips, nibbles your tongue and lips. Loving every inch of your mouth, your mind at this point is blurry and so you let yourself go.

[Sorry if I don't put the NSFW content yet, but I need to write that part properly and since I have a knot in my head, I need to organize myself with my creative ideas. I hope you liked it and I'm sorry if there are mistakes in the pronouns, my understanding of English is the same as a 3 year old :P]

[celestie0]

hi, love! how are you today? are you doing well? is work treating you good?

i hope you are doing well! flowers 💐 for my favourite girlie ✨

also have you got any tips for new writers? like i’ve been tryna write this fanfic but i cannot really understand how to keep it flowing without forcing it out, and i’m hoping you can help us out. its absolutely fine if you’re busy or cannot for any reason. no pressure truly🥹

🫶💌

hellooo i’m doing well thank you 🥺💕 work is well i just got home, its rainy where i live so i made some hot cocoa and im just in bed now. i hope you’re feeling better i know you said you were sick <3 🌤️🌤️ some sunshine for you!

ohhh to be asked for writers tips is so flattering! i tried to think of my top few, and i have them below the read line :”) hope they help in some way and if you do end up posting your works don’t hesitate to tag me i would love to read them <3

my writing tips ₊˚⊹ ᰔ

dialogue. this one is toughhh bc i feel like a lot can ride on dialogue. my biggest tip for dialogue would be to just write all of your dialogue for a scene completely stripped down. none of the “he says” & “she says” or action verbs inbetween, just write it all out like it was a simple text convo w quotation marks. that way the words will sound realistic because you’re only picturing a convo in your head, rather than also trying to juggle all the descriptive prose. after you’ve got the dialogue, then you can go back in to fluff things up. if it’s meant to be comedic or a fast-paced argument, i think keeping it relatively stripped down is the way to go, but if it’s something intense or suspenseful then fluffing it up may be the better choice. also, i find dialogue becomes easier the more you write for a specific character, so if it’s not flowing right away, don’t worry!! their words will find you eventually once you get to know the character better :)

on choosing conflicts. this can be harddd because sometimes you just want the story to exist in happy land haha. but just like you said so beautifully in the sweet kickoff ch8 review you gave me, characters won’t always act perfect, but i think a great way to make conflict seem realistic is for them to act in character but with flaws, rather than just randomly out of character with flaws. maybe make a list of what that character’s good qualities and how those qualities could also work against them, and use the latter to brainstorm realistic conflict that those qualities could put them in (ex: a character is self-sufficient, but that causes them to rely on ppl less when they need it -> they fail to reach out for help in timely manners and leads to mistakes/regrets)

pacing. the biggessstt most important thing in my opinion for writing i believe is nailing the pacing. especially for fanfiction where people may be more interested in specific niche scenes rather than all of the stuff built around it. when starting off a story, don’t be afraid to just jump straight into it! or jump straight into the dialogue and then build the scene gradually as it progresses, rather than [gigantic block of text in beginning of scene that reader must drag their eyes through] and then get to the dialogue (im sooo bad w this myself lmao i fluff things up too much). in a world where attention spans are decreasing (rip), a lot of the times less is more. make sure the pacing fits the scene (romantic -> longer paragraphs more focused on subtle details, comical -> short paragraphs w simple n relatable diction, etc)

creating characters. with fanfiction this can be easy since you already have fleshed out characters from shows/books to work off of, but a good way to characterize is to just include little details that give them personality! not only is it a way to allow the reader to resonate with the character, but also it gives other characters in the story an opportunity to notice those lil quirks and create bonds over them as well. i just picture my friends or family in my head, the things i love about them, and incorporate it (i know nothing about film photography but my friend is a film major n thats where i got the idea for mc in kickoff)

for tone and mood. i think to get words flowing for different scenes, it can be really useful to get into the environment of those scenes while you’re writing, such as listening to a song that fits the vibe of the scene prior to/during writing (i blasted tgif by katy perry while writing the party scenes in ch6 of kickoff lol), or if its a scene at night, write it w the lights off, or watch a youtube vid w scenery that matches. may sound silly, but it could help! if i write something angsty in a really bright sunshine environment it’s hard for me to get the words

read more. this is sort of a miscellaneous one but a good way to subconsciously get better at writing is to just read more! your brain kinda learns how to write on its own when you read. also, when i’m reading, if i see words i really like i jot them down in my notes app so i have my own lil vocabulary of words that i know i would like to use in my writing

on writing insecurities. be proud of your writing!! your first draft does NOT have to be perfect. some days the words will flow, but on some they won’t, and that’s okay. don’t get too into your head about “i wonder what readers will think of this plot point or this character action” etc, i think having faith in your own process but also in your readers will bring you a lot of peace as you write :) create what you want to create and the rest will follow!! when i first started posting kickoff i was overthinking sooo many things that ended up being received just fine by readers in the end, so just stick to your plan 🫶🏼💕

use chatgpt. looool ai can be useful in writing too! i usually only use it after i'm completed with a draft, and i just plug select paragraphs into it to see if it can come up with some better words for me to use. it's also useful to come up with logistical details for aspects of your stories for world-building etc (no clue anything ab professional collegiate soccer games i've never been to one but i used chatgpt to come up with the scenes)

woooow i wrote way more than i thought i would haha but i hope this helps!! ive never given tips before so idk if these only make sense to me 💀 but hopefully they can be applied to what you’re looking to write as well :)

[cryptidsurveys]

Thursday, November 7th, 2024.

What's one simple pleasure(s) that you greatly enjoy? Waking up to a snow-covered landscape. Cuddling with my cats while cozy in bed. Eating a warm and delicious breakfast. What a nice morning. <3

What are you listening to? The furnace running and the sound of my typing.

Are you in a relationship? I'm not.

What is your opinion on abortion? I'm pro-choice.

Why do you think so many people get depressed these days? There are probably a lot of factors. There certainly were in my own life. Thankfully, I'm doing so much better now and would no longer consider myself depressed.

Last movie you saw in theaters: Wild Robot.

Your heart is beating faster than usual, whom are you standing next to? It would most likely beat that way due to anxiety, so maybe Alex, my sibling, or certain people from my past.

What was going through your mind during your last kiss? I no longer recall.

Why did your last relationship fail? I was deeply mentally ill and harbored a lot of unresolved trauma. I also just don't think we were as compatible as we wished we were.

Do you feel like screaming? Naw.

How are you in general? Pretty good. Looking forward to a relaxing day of housecleaning and baking.

Do you think the world would be a better place without humans? It would be less polluted and there wouldn't be any human-caused suffering, but nature - for all its beauty and abundance - is still an incredibly indifferent, destructive, and oftentimes grotesque force. Eliminating humanity from the equation wouldn't suddenly transform the Earth into a Garden of Eden.

Last dream you had: The first fragment involved the animal shelter. I don't remember much aside from tasks taking an incredibly long time and feeling like I was fumbling around without making much progress. The second dream mainly took place in something of a hospital setting. Reminded me of my eating disorder inpatient days. I was showing Nick (ex-partner) around to the various gaming/activity rooms. There was also a bit of initial estrangement and rekindled romance involved, but nothing too over the top. Mostly limited to hugging, so relatively PG.

What's your favorite drink? Water, coffee, and hot chocolate.

What's love to you? A deep feeling of trust, respect, understanding, etc. Which are also words that are difficult to define, lmao.

How is the weather today? Cloudy, snowy, and 30*F.

Are you in love? I'm not.

What was your favorite cartoon during childhood? I didn't have an absolute favorite, but I watched shows like Doug, Rugrats, Hey Arnold, Spongebob, Dragon Ball Z, Yu-Gi-Oh, etc.

Who is your best friend and why? Oliver.

What is your greatest fear? Losing my dad.

What is on your mind right now? Mostly animal shelter stuff and how to stay safely separate from some possible drama. I don't want a repeat of last time, so I'm going to have to set boundaries even if it upsets some people (or one person in particular - everyone else should be chill about it).

Do you have any addictions? Smoking.

Have you ever done drugs, if so, what? Yeah.

Do you enjoy watching Family Guy? I did when I was younger, but I doubt I would enjoy it now. It's just not my cup of tea.

What is it that you really want right now? No more migraines. It's the biggest missing puzzle piece in my life right now. Without them, I would have almost no reservations about applying to the animal shelter.

Are you deep? Well, I'm not shallow…but there are far deeper thinkers than me out there.

What is your opinion of God? Is he real? I choose to believe in God. But is God real, and what is God, actually? I have no idea.

Do you and your best friend have funny nicknames for one another? Not really.

Are you a parent? I'm not.

Who would you like to be for a day? Maybe a climber summiting Mount Everest. I am aware of all the issues and controversies surrounding it, but since we're talking impossible hypotheticals here…yeah.

Is there a member of the opposite sex that you can tell anything to? I can tell pretty much anything to my therapist.

What are some bands that you've seen live?

Who is your favorite person? My dad.

What is your favorite season? Autumn. The early days when the leaves are just beginning to change and there's only a whisper of a chill in the air. The middle days when the leaves are in full transformation and the nights are longer and cozier. And the later days when the trees are mostly barren, the cold and frost are constant companions, and the snow begins to fly.

If you would get the chance to relive your past, would you do differently? Like my whole life or just specific parts of it? Would I magically know then what I know now? It's just weird to imagine being a baby and possessing all of my current knowledge and experience…

How? There are all kinds of things I would do differently…or might never experience at all. I don't know how dramatic the "butterfly effect" would be, but at some point I would inevitably break with my original trajectory and wind up in unknown territory. Honestly, though, I would prefer to work with the life I have.

Do you know who Kurt Cobain is? Yeah.

What about Ben Moody? Yeah.

How is life for you? I would say it's mostly good. It has its challenging and painful aspects, but they're tolerable.

State something about yourself that no one knows? Hmm.

Do you have any pets? What are their names? I have three kitties named Esther, Karenna, and Lacy.

Last joke you heard, did you find it funny? Slightly.

What is your favorite recent memory? Hiking along the Carhart trail with my dad. Such a quintessential cloudy autumn day brimming with nostalgia.

Do you like to cuddle? Yesss.

What is the most important thing to you in life? My loved ones, my cats, volunteering, growing/healing, learning how to create and protect a sense of peace.

What is your favorite movie?

What's a song(s) you can relate to?

Have you heard of Postsecret? Yeah.

Whom do you look up to? My dad, staff at the animal shelter, my therapist, etc.

Where and with whom did your last hug take place? I think it was at Chili's. My mom and I hugged after we went out to eat.

Do you want children someday? No.

What would you name them?

If you could represent a sin, what would it be? Sloth or envy.

Do you enjoy horror movies? Yeah.

Do you believe in ghosts? I'm not sure. Even though I'm fascinated by the paranormal, I sure am something of a skeptic.

Would you ever go bungee jumping? Maybe if the opportunity presented itself, but it's not something I would seek out.

If you had 13 million dollars, what would you do with it? Probably just save it and use it as necessary. I can't see myself changing my lifestyle very much.

Are you waiting for someone to message or text you? I just checked my text messages and saw one from Iris (manager). She asked if I was coming in today/couldn't remember my usual days. I told her my schedule and said I would be happy to come in if needed, so now I'm just waiting for a text back.

Do you tend to hide your true self? Yeah.

Do you have a lot of friends? Just one best friend.

What's the last time you laughed really hard? A few weeks ago.

Are you looking forward to anything? Yes.

[real-odark]

hi! i have a question, have you experienced an art block? if so, is there any way you got out of it and just... started drawing? i've been suffering from an art block for i think *checks notes* 6 years now... uhhh... how did you find your style too?

HELLO ANON!! i yap so im gunna put my response under the cut but i hope my ?!! babbling ?!!??! helps

to answer your question yes i most definitely Have experienced art block..... very frequently between months i'll have chunks of time where its literally impossible for me to feel like anything i'm doing is good or even have motivation to draw and its a NIGHTMARE <\33

usually when this happens to me to work out of it i like to start by doodling ideas i have as much as i possibly can (especially little jokes between characters i made/like) and then slowly work my way up from like a bajillion little cartoon simple doodles into a slightly more complicated style and then usually i can work myself back in to doing some bigger pieces !! (even though i dont do thoughs that much even out of art block lmao but u get the idea,,)

and. well HOLY MOLY. i cannot say i have had an art block as long as u before my fine sir Holy bejeezus...,...

but i'd say to help develop your style i know everyone says this but its true, FIND INSPIRATION!!! (this is to help with your style and motivation because inspiration does NUMBERS for me it actually gets juices flowing instead of just forcing my brain to come up with something just cuz its "original", hell yeah draw that meme template if u wanna if it gives u inspiration worms... OK back to style now my bad)

finding other peoples art styles i like and breaking down what i like about them has helped me with making my own art SIGNFICANTLY and i still do very often, so thats why my art style changes a lot very frequently 😭

and dont tell anyone i encourage this but i totally take features i like from artists whose styles give me the brainworms. LIKE OBVIOUSLY IM NOT TRACING but what has helped me so much over the years is trying out different styles, like. a mix and match sort of??? i completely learned how i draw hair from a tiktoker i used to watch like 6/5 years ago,,, and to this day a lot of people still comment on how i draw it so YA!!! i have also developed by trying different anatomy styles (like. stylized Versions) for what makes me most comfortable, and different simplicities of facial features (like detailed eyes or just. Dots. like fr go wild if u like how it looks)

but most of all remember that your art will NEVER have to be a definitive thing!!!!!! even your FAVORITE artists if u look at their art from like. 4 years ago i can guarantee you you can see how their style has developed. basically what im trying to say is dont stress about having "your own" style if you think thats like going to define your art!! YOU DEFINE YOUR ART!!!! so if u feel like changing your art literally entirely at any point. DO IT! if having a style helps you to draw though i totally encourage finding one but it Also does not hurt to try other styles as u progress in art

thank u sm for the ask it is Not every day i get to yap on here (yes it is) ((i do very frequently)) (((sorry for bombarding u with this response LMAO)))

I HOPE THIS HELPED IN SOME WAY AT ALL !!!!*AND IF NOT UHHH.:.,. maybe find someone who isnt a random teenager on this app for real advice HELP