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BEGINNERS GUIDE TO BLUESKY
Hiya! Curious about joining bluesky but intimidated by all the features? Already on bluesky but want to learn more? Then welcome to my quick guide on getting started and navigating bluesky!~
What is Bluesky?
it’s a social media site that’s owned by no single person or company. it's aim is to bring back the early days of twitter before bots, elon musk or algorithms took over. Personally I find the site really cozy, wholesome, and engaging. my Bluesky account for example
What’s unique about Bluesky?
→ CUSTOMIZATION: your timeline is very easy to control. There’s tons of options, so be sure to go through each tab in your settings. some options include: turning off autoplay, changing the order in which threaded replies show, changing DM settings, content preferences and lots of visual app settings.
→ MODERATION LISTS: human made, mass blocklists. These are public lists of accounts that when you subscribe to you automatically block or mute everyone in that specific blocklist. A great way to avoid unwanted content, and interactions. ✦ Moderation lists I recommend will be below the cut
→ STARTER PACKS: recommendation lists on who to follow, made by users. You can even curate your own starter pack of recommendations! ✦ Starter pack recommendations will be below the cut
→ FEEDS: public timelines, basically. There are a lot of feeds you can join, or you can even create your own. I made a feed featuring just my pixel art so it doesn’t get cluttered with text posts or other photos in my media tab. ✦ I’ll post feeds I recommend below and link you to a tutorial on how to create your own feed
→ BLOCKING/MUTING: bluesky has a great blocking system. When you block someone they can no longer see, or interact with you. They also have a feature to make your blog inaccessible unless logged in. you can also mute specific people, delete post replies, and even detach your post from a reblog. You can also mute specific words, phrases, tags etc.
→ NSFW: bluesky allows NSFW content, including artwork, porn, lewds etc. They also have a great moderation page to avoid the content completely, censor the content, or show it if you’d wish. ✦ just go to settings > moderation > toggle on NSFW settings and it’ll let you heavily moderate.
→ LABELS: this is a really cool feature on the site, you can subscribe to certain pages that enable a lot of fun/useful labels that help you in different ways! (like pronoun tags, artist tags etc) ✦ Labels to browse will be posted below
→ COMMUNITIES: the vastly diverse communities really feel like the best parts of tumblr. since you can so heavily curate your experience, it can really feel like a calming oasis. Mine is mostly artists, and other creatives.
there’s also a large community of professional artists, art directors, authors, celebrities, and even the best shitposters from twitter. the app really is what you make of it but it’s thriving right now.
RECOMMENDATIONS & LINKS BELOW ⬎
→ MODERATION LISTS:
HATE SPEECH: NAZIS | MAGA | MAGAv2 | MAGAv3 | TRANSPHOBES & HOMOPHOBES | FAR RIGHT | FAR RIGHTv2 | FAR RIGHTv3 | ELON MUSK FANBOYS | ANTI-BLACK | ANTI-VAX
NFT/AI/CRYPTO: MASTERLIST | AI/NFT | AI/NFTv2 | AI FANBOYS | CRYPTO | NFTs
SPAM/SCAMMERS: SPAMBOTS | BOTS | CONTENT SCRAPERS | CONTENT FARMING
✦ to block or mute everyone in the blocklist at once, click subscribe in the top right corner:
→ STARTER PACKS:
ART: PIXEL ART | PIXEL ARTv2 | WOMEN OF PIXEL ART | BADASS DIGITAL ARTISTS | MAGIC THE GATHERING ARTIST | PAINTERS OF BLUESKY | INDIE COMIC CREATORS | LGBTQIA+ COMIC CREATORS
GENERAL: WOMEN OF BSKY | AUTHORS | LGBTQ NEWS
SHITPOSTERS: JUNIPER | JUNIPERv2 | MASTERLIST | SCIENCE SHITPOSTERS
✦ for more niche starter packs, use the search function. search your specific interest and ‘starter pack’ and you’ll find some!
→ FEEDS:
DISCOVER | WHATS TRENDING | MENTIONS | ART | TRENDING ART
THE GRAM: a timeline for exclusively image posts from those you follow. no textposts etc. ONLYPOST: similar to the gram, it shows a timeline of only those you follow. no reposts, just original posts. 📌: a way to bookmark posts. just reply with the pin emoji.
✦ there’s tons of others feeds as well! just use the feed tab and you can browse feeds or search for specific ones.
✦ TUTORIAL ON HOW TO CREATE A CUSTOM FEED FOR YOUR ART/POSTS
→ LABELS:
SKYWATCH: most popular label. Lots of useful labels!
AI Labels: identifies AI users, can also enable hiding the posters.
Pronouns: self explanatory but useful. can add a badge with your pronouns!
✦ you can search for additional label bots on bluesky!
OTHER RECOMMENDATIONS:
✦ EXPIRIENCE ENHANCING TOOLS RECS ✦ CLEARSKY: TRACK BLOCKS AND BLOCKLISTS ✦ SKYFEED: CREATE CUSTOM FEEDS EASILY ✦ use the block function often. do not entertain trolls or hate speech. ✦ as well as starter packs, there’s also lists! lists can be used in the same way to create curated lists of accounts. it’s a good way to keep track of specific genres of posters you’re interested in, and finding new ones! ✦ hashtags: use them! they’re beneficial in boosting your post. you can even link hashtags in your bio making you easier to find. another method of making you more visible is if you post an ‘interest’ post! basically just type things you’re interested in and it’ll help people find you / vice versa ! ✦ update your profile first thing, like bio avi etc. make a small post so people know you're real. interact and engage! the communities there are so welcoming!
I think that covers abt everything i wanted to cover! Hope this was helpful and thanks for reading lol
#bluesky#bluesky starter pack#bluesky social#bsky.app#bsky#bsky social#bluesky tutorial#bluesky walkthrough#bluesky app#ooooooooook that took forever lol hope its useful!!!!!!!!#long post#text post
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In Front of Me (2)
cause i was blind to see that you were right in front of me ₊˚
⊹ pairing: jeon wonwoo x f.reader ⊹ genre: bestfriends to (?), angst, smut (R: 18+ mdni) ⊹ wordcount: 40.6k (part 1: here) (part 2)
⊹ summary: jeon wonwoo has spent most of his adolesence and early adult hood unable to understand why he can't seem to stay in a relationship for more than a few months. as his best friend, you allowed him to vent about his worries without judgment. so what if you're in love with him? your friendship with wonwoo meant more to you than having your feelings reciprocated. that is until you hit your breaking point, while wonwoo finally realizes what has been in front of him this whole time.
⊹ tags: non-idol!au, uni!au, unrequited love (for the most part), pining, toxic!wonwoo, toxic!reader, both in wonwoo and readers pov, questionable protagonists, mentions of other svt members, happy ending (?), emotionally constipated characters (wonwoo), flashbacks, slight seokmin x reader, a lot of emotions thrown everywhere. (smut and content warnings under the cut)
⊹ note: here is pt.2 i hope you like how this ended :) thank you for reading ♡ please leave a reblog, comment, or ask with your thoughts, i appreciate u !
⊹ masterlist, fic playlist.
⊹ smut tags: dry humping, kissing, fingering, penetrative sex, corruption kink, degradation, dom!wonwoo, brat!reader, virgin!reader,oral (f. receiving), creampie, exhibitionsm (?), slightly perv!wonwoo undertones, petnames (reader: darling, baby) (wonwoo: baby), big dick wonwoo, riding, headlock (this is a warning actly). ⊹ warnings: alcohol, reader is downbad for wonwoo, stalking, slut-shaming, evasions of privacy, if i missed anything lmk! cuz ik i did i just can't think of what hehe :p
act two, self control.
chapter one, before the fight.
The booth you sat in was far too cramped for your liking, yet there was a sense of relief that washed over you. Raval had been a go-to hang-out spot after all the tireless hours spent studying during the weekdays. The atmosphere was lively, your friends’ laughter drowning out most of your thoughts.
Tonight also marked the first time in your life that you could fully enjoy a night out with your friends. Without Wonwoo’s presence clouding your worries.
Despite his obvious plea for attention, you felt like you could finally breathe. The adjustment and decision to flat-out ignore him was difficult, but thanks to Seokmin it had become a little easier to bear over time. This past week was filled with more joy than you’ve had in a long time. And Seokmin had been extremely doting towards you throughout it all.
“Babe, can you pass the pistachios please?” Jun pouts, his cheeks red from his third glass of beer.
“Did you need me to peel them for you, baby?” June coos, lips curling into a cutesy tone.
With a quizzical expression, Mingyu turns to Kalia, trying not to laugh at the other couple's foolishness. The two share a look before Kalia fake gags, causing Mingyu to burst out laughing. It had almost gone unnoticed until Mingyu broke out into a fit of giggles, June glaring at him with an unamused expression.
Watching the whole scene unfold had you smiling to yourself, wondering if there would ever be a time when you got to have these cheesy moments with someone the way your friends did.
“Oh please, Kalia. You act like I didn’t see you and Mingyu practically eating each other's faces off in the library yesterday, ” June huffs, shooting daggers at the both of them while peeling away the pistachio shells for her drunken boyfriend.
“Hey! You said that no one would catch us.” Kalia slaps the back of Mingyu’s head, causing him to wince.
“First of all ouch, second of all, I didn’t know that anyone would go that far back into the library!” Mingyu defends himself.
“Actually, the two of us were trying to do the same thing, but we saw you and dipped,” Jun confesses in his drunken state, while he munches on the pistachios June had been feeding him.
“Ha! Take that June, you're just as bad as us, if not worse,” Kalia gibes, sticking her tongue out at June.
“Actually, all of you are equally as corny, end of discussion,” Leigh chirps, his eyes rolling as Lynne, his twin sister, cackles beside him. Both evidently fed up with the ‘who’s the cheesier couple’ argument.
Amidst all the bickering, you take a sip of your drink, eyes glimmering with admiration. It seemed so simple for your friends to find someone who truly loved them, and wasn’t afraid to show it.
Wonwoo had been at the forefront of your mind for so long that you had denied yourself anyone else. You had been so set on making Wonwoo your end goal when you could’ve found someone who would’ve treated you better. Reminders of all your missed opportunities left a bitter taste in your mouth, the alcohol on your tongue sweet in comparison.
“Something on your mind?” Lynne breaks you out of your thoughts.
With your glass pushed down onto the sticky bar table, you give her a crooked smile that feels less disingenuous than the previous smiles you have been producing these past few months.
“Kinda wondering when I’ll have something like those goofballs over there,” you chuckle bitterly, head motioning to the two girls fake arguing while their boyfriends sat there cluelessly.
“I thought you were dating Wownoo?” Lynne asks, and you couldn’t help but laugh at your pitiful situation.
His face flashes briefly within your mind, and you’d almost forgotten that you had chosen not to speak to him, for how long? You weren’t sure. It could be days or months, or until you’ve finally healed from your one-sided heartbreak.
“No… no. He and I were just close friends,” your tone is melancholic. Lynne’s worry is transparent as she squeezes your shoulder.
Desolation filled your senses regardless of the bar patrons' exuberant chatter. Your group of friends were all in their own worlds while you were troubled and inattentive. There was guilt gnawing at your insides. You didn’t want this to be one of those talks where you delve into the intricacies of your peculiar friendship with Wonwoo.
“And that's okay, too. I'm not sure what happened, but he’s an idiot if he can’t see what's right in front of him,” she affirmed as you sat there, relieved that she didn’t press the situation further.
“Tell me about it, it feels like everyone's been saying the same thing,” you mutter.
Overhearing your conversation, Lynne’s twin brother couldn’t help but jump in, “Wonwoo’s a dumbass.”
Lynne gives him a pointed look, but can’t help but laugh at her brother's antics. Feathery giggles leave your throat too, finding Leigh’s unexpected declaration amusing.
“Sorry, I had to put my two cents in, he kinda sucks! As a friend he’s okay I guess, but as a boyfriend, girl, you’re better off without him,” Leigh puts his hands up in defence, but there was truth behind his statement.
“True, I’ve seen what he’s done to some of the girls on campus, total—,” Lynne begins, only for her sentence to be cut off.
“Red flag,” Leigh finishes Lynne’s proclamation.
Twin telepathy, you assumed.
“Hey, I’ll cheers to that,” you shook your head with a chuckle, taking three shot glasses before topping them up with a bottle of tequila Mingyu had bought for the table.
“What! You guys are taking shots without us?” Jun whined before filling his glass with liquor.
The whole table's attention is on the three of you now, joining in on the rounds of shots going around. The clangour of glassware chimes throughout the carved-out space of the bar you and your friends had claimed for the night.
“Wonwoo’s an asshole!” Leigh blurted out loud before throwing back the alcohol in his cup.
There's a moment of silence amongst the rest of your friends at the table, before they all burst out laughing before repeating Leigh’s words.
“Wonwoo’s an asshole!” They all say wholeheartedly in unison.
The gleam in everyone’s eyes caused warmth to swell all over your body. Nothing could compare to moments like these, and you desperately hoped that the night wouldn’t end. The reassurance that your friends had given you should’ve been worth the pain of cutting Wonwoo off. Praying that their effort to cheer you up wouldn’t be wasted on foolish decisions you desperately wanted to make; the yearning for Wonwoo has only skyrocketed and it frightens you to the core.
No matter how distracted you attempt to make yourself, he still floods your every waking thought.
two.
Since your decision to ignore Wonwoo, Seokmin has been coming over to your place a lot more often. You can’t recollect when it started to happen, but you're not opposed to his company. It’s quite the opposite actually; if anything he’s made your days a lot brighter, keeping you distracted from your urge to text Wonwoo.
The time you spent with Seokmin mostly consisted of him trying to get you to finish the whole Harry Potter series with him. When you told him you’ve never seen the movies before, he had a comical look of shock painted over his face. Hands slapped against his cheeks, eyes wide they almost popped out of the sockets, type of comical.
“Not even the first movie?! Not even on Halloween during elementary school?” Seokmin gasps, hands on your shoulders, trying to gauge what you did and didn’t know about the infamous films.
“Yes! Not even when I was a kid, is it bad that I haven’t watched it?”
“It's not just bad, this is almost criminal,” Seokmin sighs, feigning distraught.
You chortle at his remark, baffled by how seriously passionate he is about Harry Potter, which ended almost ten years ago, you might add.
“Well, there’s only one thing we can do,” he shakes his head, reaching for the remote on the coffee table. We’re going to binge-watch this thing until you're caught up.”
“What? Isn’t that a bit much? There are like a bajillion movies,” you exasperate.
Not wanting to hear another complaint from you, Seokmin shushes you dramatically. His pointer finger was in front of your lips before you could get another word in.
“I'll get the snacks. You sit here and get comfy because you’re in for a ride,” Seokmin asserts before standing to grab food and drinks from your kitchen.
An audible sigh leaves your lips, arms crossed as you pull the blanket over yourself to “get comfy” just as Seokmin wanted.
A few minutes passed before Seokmin returned to the living room, a bowl of microwave popcorn perched on his side and two cans of soda cradled in his other arm.
“You left your phone on the counter, by the way,” He mentions before placing it on the coffee table.
“Oh! Thanks, I didn’t even realize,” you smile, shifting to make room for him on the couch.
“You ready for the greatest movie experience ever?” Seokmin beamed, plopping back into his seat beside you.
“Sure, but we can only watch the first two,” you bargained with him, knowing that if he had it his way, you two would be up till sunrise.
Seokmin rolled his eyes jokingly, pretending to be annoyed with your lack of enthusiasm. Despite his antics, he agrees with your compromise. The movie begins to play and you let yourself relax in his presence. A bowl of popcorn is shared between you two while he wraps his hand over your shoulder. Not used to the proximity between you and him, you're thankful the increased volume drowned out the pitter-patter of your heartbeat.
…
“Well that was a lot better than I expected,” you admit.
Although you were uncertain about watching the movies at first, you had acknowledged the hype around the Harry Potter franchise. Seokmin had caught all your facial expressions while watching, peering over to catch your reactions during all the major plot points. You had been so obviously absorbed in it that you didn’t realize he had been staring.
“I told you! It just gets better from here. The Goblet of Fire is my favourite, you’ll love it,” Seokmin marvels, wanting to indulge in his interests with you.
“Tom Riddle is kinda cute, I won’t lie.”
“But he’s evil…and you know he gets ugly anyways. He’s literally Voldemort!” Seokmin disputed with a stare of mild disgust.
“Yeah, I know, but there’s a bunch of attractive villains, like Killmonger from Black Panther,” you shrug, but Seokmin looks at you like you had just insulted his entire bloodline with your statement.
Giggling, you didn’t expect him to take your opinions so seriously.
“Fine. I won't say anything else. You go take your shower, and I’ll clean up,” he ushers you toward your room while holding the empty bowl in his hands.
“How did you know that I was gonna take a shower?” you ask with curiosity.
“I’ve known you for so long, you always take a shower before bed,” Seokmin explained nonchalantly.
Heat radiated off your face, and your timid expression would’ve been visible if Seokmin’s back wasn’t facing you. You hadn’t realized how well Seokmin knew you.
“Thanks for cleaning up, I won’t be long,” you give him a smile of gratitude before heading over to your bathroom.
The more time you spend with Seokmin, the more you regret falling for Wonwoo. Seokmin is kind and doting, and he never causes you to feel any worry. He is the prime example of home, reminiscent of a warm fire while snuggled up on the couch with a pile of blankets.
Seokmin feels safe. The safe choice, the smart choice.
Unfortunately, you were too foolish to have known sooner. Your irrevocable love for Wonwoo overshadowed all the possibilities of being with Seokmin.
A knock on your front door brings you out of your spiralling thoughts. But before you head over to open the door, Seokmin beats you to it.
“Minnie? Is someone at the door?” you call out from your bathroom, not bothering to leave.
“Yeah! Your neighbour just needed to borrow something,” Seokmin half yelled from where he stood.
There was a moment of doubt in your mind, why would your neighbour want to borrow something so late into the night? Instead of investigating further, you leave it to Seokmin to help them, too tired to talk to anyone else for the rest of the evening.
“Okay!” is all you say.
You turn on the shower, allowing the steam to congregate and relax your senses. As you step in, you grant the warm water the ability to wash away your conflicting thoughts about both Seokmin and Wonwoo.
after the fight.
“It’s time for you to go. I’m tired, Wonwoo.”
The bile in your throat stings, the corner of your eyes wet with tears. You didn’t expect Wonwoo to burst in here accusing you of things you wouldn’t dare do. There’s a familiar hollow feeling in your chest as you recollect how much of your heart you laid bare for him to witness.
Had you known that ignoring him would lead to an outburst of unrelenting anger, you wouldn’t have done so in the first place. Even when this cologne hangs in the still air of your apartment, you yearn for his presence. Even when you unleashed your fury at him, kicking him out with no remorse, you still yearn for his touch.
There hadn’t been many fights between the two of you, only enough to count on one hand. It would be petty arguments over stupid things. Arguments that would lead to one of you apologizing before the day was over. This fight seems different. It can’t be resolved with a quick ‘I’m sorry’.
Defeated and tired, you move to your bed. Your phone sits atop the dresser. Curious and wishing for Wonwoo to just return and apologize, you click his contact. You almost feel like you are in some fever dream, the words ‘you’ve blocked this number’ staring back at you in flashing red.
Horrified by the sight of your phone screen, you don’t remember blocking him in the first place. Wracking your brain, you’re trying to think of all the instances where you had been drunk or high enough to even do so, but nothing comes to mind. If you didn’t block him, then who did?
You unblock his contact as quickly as possible, not wanting to create even more distance between you, although it might be too late to rectify the situation. A few messages were sent shortly after the fight had gone down.
[2:55 a.m.] [wons <3: idk if you’ll receive this but i’m sorry darling. i mean it.] [wons <3: i didn’t mean what i said earlier. i was just so angry. when ure ready to talk, lmk.]
Wonwoo’s text brings a swell of comfort within you. As much as you hate what he did, you could never bring yourself to hate him.
three.
“You know, I’m kinda glad you’re here,” you professed.
The harrowed walls of your home became a lot more bearable now that you had someone other than yourself inside them. The entire place felt far too big for you, especially because you tend to sit alone with your thoughts too often.
Seokmin coming over to hang out was not part of your initial plan. But his unannounced visit wasn’t unwelcomed either. He was extremely talented in distracting you with his sporadic outbursts of energy and laughter. Seokmin made you feel quaint, almost as if he could be the ‘someone’ after everything you had been through with Wonwoo.
With crescent-shaped eyes that appeared when his smile broadened, Seokmin wrapped his arm tautly against your shoulder.
“I honestly just came over to check on how you were doing, after everything that happened, but I don’t mind staying for a while, I’d do anything if you asked.”
“Are you flirting with me, Lee Seokmin?”
Seokmin threw his head back with a hearty contagious laugh. Before you knew it, you were laughing along with him.
The voice in the back of your head hissed symphonies of how easier your life would’ve been if you had just fallen in love with Seokmin instead. No matter how many times you tried to unearth a flaw of his, nothing comes to mind. There were so many signs leading you toward him, and how perfect he would be for you. But your heart still belongs elsewhere, even after what has been said and done.
Seokmin’s eyes dimmed, “Would it be so bad if I was?”
Taken aback by his words, your mouth opens and closes, trying to figure out whether he’s joking or genuine about his statement.
“I-I guess not,” you mumble, watching the way his gaze shifts from your eyes down to your lips.
Holding your breath, you can’t deny the tension that the two of you had created. Bodies practically meshed together on the couch, you weren’t sure how you ended up in this position but if Seokmin was the answer to distracting you from the fight with Wonwoo, who were you to deny him?
“I really want to kiss you,” Seokmin confesses.
“I wouldn’t stop you if you did.”
Seokmin didn’t need much convincing after what you had professed. Swinging your legs over his lap, he grapples you into a position that has you straddling his thighs. The swiftness of his movements almost caused a yelp to leap out of your throat, but he steadied you before you could let out another noise.
With the faintest of touch, Seokmin places his lips over yours. Ever so cautious, ever so careful, he clearly wants to savour the moment. Despite his heedfulness, you were the exact opposite. You want it to be fast, you want him to be rough.
There’s deliberate fervour behind your actions, causing Seokmin to groan in surprise. Rough palms gripping your waist, he matches your energy. The world sinks into a deep void along with the cruel songstress who refused to let you neglect your feelings for Wonwoo.
Even though you have the desire to prolong your make-out with Seokmin, your phone buzzes against the plush cushions of your couch. Practically jumping out of his lap, you unlock your phone as if you weren’t just making out with Seokmin, to discover yet another text from Wonwoo.
Every time his contact appears on your screen, your heart can’t help but skip a beat. It angers you how easily enraptured you are by something so minuscule. Even after you had kicked him out of your house that night, you can’t deny his diligence and how desperate he is for forgiveness.
You almost wanted to curse him out for his audacity, but the other half wanted to give in and let him explain. Eyes glued to his messages, you find yourself reading them over and over again, your heart swollen with an aching desire to talk to him again.
[11:09 p.m.] [wons <3: hi. ik ur still mad but let me make it up to you. please?] [wons <3: i don’t know what i have to do to make u forgive me but just know i don’t want us to end on this note.] [wons <3: please darling, u mean so much to me, i don’t wanna lose u.] [wons <3: i can’t stand this. please, just give me a chance to make things right]
Only a fool would be swooning over his visible cry out for attention, and a fool you were. Wonwoo’s claws have sunk so deep into you, that you can’t even kiss someone without him interrupting. It's like he knew what you were doing without even seeing you.
“I thought you blocked him?” the inflection of disappointment apparent in Seokmin’s voice.
Plopping your phone back down on the sofa, your brain finally registers the words that Seokmin had just uttered. You know for a fact that it wasn’t you who blocked his contact, but how the hell did Seokmin know?
Unless he was the one to do so…
A moment of realization struck you like a bolt of lightning, and the confusion finally cleared by the slip of Seokmin’s tongue. Why would he block Wonwoo’s contact on your phone?
Attempting to recall when and where this could’ve happened, you remember the day you left your phone on the kitchen counter during the Harry Potter movie marathon. The burn at the back of your throat intensified as awareness sunk into your whole being. Seokmin was under the guise of a doting friend while you were in your feelings for Wonwoo. Pretending to be your knight in shining armour while you were in a vulnerable state. How could you be so naive?
Wonwoo had been trying to tell you the truth, but you foolishly snubbed all his warnings out of anger.
Nauseous and betrayed, you didn’t know that Seokmin would turn out to be the one to manipulate you, to sway your opinions to gain your time and affection. You’re so shaken up from your revelation that you almost forget who exactly is sitting right in front of you.
“I’m really sorry Seokmin, but that kiss. I wasn’t thinking straight,” you attempt to act calm, not wanting to escalate the situation.
“It’s okay, I understand. It's only been a week,” he shrugs with a rueful demeanour, “You’re still in love with him and there's not a lot I can do to change your mind.”
“You’re right, there isn’t,” you reply with certainty. “I've been in love with him for years, and that’s not going to change for a while.”
“I just want you to know I’ll be here when you’re ready.”
“I can’t do that to you knowing I still love him,” you disclose and hurt flashes across Seokmin’s eyes.
“I understand.”
“I hope so, considering you had gone on my phone behind my back and blocked his contact.”
Shock is the best way to describe Seokmin’s reaction. He probably hadn’t realized that you figured out where his true intentions lie. But now that it’s out in the open, you can’t help but stand your ground.
Seokmin doesn’t deserve to be in your presence right now, especially after he took advantage of your vulnerability.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Seokmin tries to respond nonchalantly, but his eyes frantically avoid your gaze.
“You know damn well what I’m talking about,” you grit, your knuckles were straining from how hard you gripped onto your phone. Displacing your anger before it was shot full throttle and onto Seokmin’s face.
“Fine. You caught me. But there wasn’t any other way for you to forget him if you kept in contact with him. Even if you weren’t explicitly answering his texts.”
Standing up and stalking over to your door, you open it to usher Seokmin out of the home.
“That’s for me to decide. Not you. Now please leave.”
Without much defiance, Seokmin leaves, evidently hurt by your anger towards him. The frown on his face deepened while he grabbed all his things, and walked out your door.
As he leaves, he utters his last words, clearly miffed by your decision to kick him out.
“I may be in love with you just as much as you are with Wonwoo, but at least I’m not dumb enough to go back to someone who obviously doesn’t give a shit about me. Your life will get easier when you stop being an idiot and start seeing how bad he is for you.”
…
The unsavoury memories of earlier had you deep in thought, especially after the statement Seokmin had made. He was supposed to be your safe space, but he ruined it with his need to cut Wonwoo out of your life for you. Yet there was clear wisdom to what he had said. Wonwoo only complicated your life and feelings further.
Everything would be so simple if it were Seokmin instead, and you acknowledge that. But your heart didn’t seek out his touch the way it did with Wonwoo.
Seokmin let his feelings get in the way of what could’ve been the start of something good. If only he hadn’t done what he did, maybe if he had just given you more time to heal, things between the two of you would be different. Although the friendship with Seokmin had turned sour, he still deserves someone who would love him unconditionally, it just wasn’t you.
Wonwoo was the person you truly wanted, and although the break and argument between you two were enlightening, you cannot deny how right he is about Seokmin.
You also cannot deny how much you still miss him.
Can’t Get You.
chapter one.
“I gave up so much for you, Wonwoo. I lost so much of myself trying to please you. But I give up. I was drowning in my love for you.”
You are an enigma inside Wonwoo’s mind, and it was the first time in a while that he had experienced deep regret and grief. Forcing himself into your home to accuse you all because of his resentment towards Seokmin, he couldn’t have been less irrational. And now he had to face the consequences of his actions.
Sleepless night after sleepless night, he had no way to make up for what he had done to you. Years of cluelessly assuming that you only ever saw him as a friend, of using you as a crutch for his anguish. He had been so unfair, and there's a sense of exasperation he cannot disenthrall.
Wonwoo is supposed to be your friend as much as you were his, but he dared to treat you as his therapist, his support system. If he hadn’t been so blind to your feelings, none of this would’ve happened. Maybe he would’ve been able to reciprocate your feelings earlier if he had known that you were in love with him this whole time.
The buzz of a notification illuminates his dim bedroom, the light of his screen creating shadows that harboured his contrition. He had half the mind to answer, but after what he had said to you that day, he knew it wasn’t going to be you.
Wonwoo decided to take a look anyway.
[12:09 a.m.]
[darling <3: you were right about seokmin]
[darling <3: that doesn’t mean i forgive u. i just thot id let u know]
With his heartbeat hammering inside his chest, Wonwoo couldn’t contain his elation. It’s been so long since he’d seen your name on his phone screen, and despite the context not being ideal, he decided to look at the brighter side.
Although he’s not sure what had gone down between you and Seokmin, Wonwoo couldn’t find it in himself to care. All he knows is that he was right to warn you, and he has a chance to have you all for himself once again. Without the worry of Seokmin interrupting his plans.
[12:10 a.m.]
[wons <3: i’ve missed you, darling]
[wons <3: i know i’ve been a bad friend in the past, but i want to show u that i can change. please]
[wons <3: i promise, i'm going to be better]
Desperation was never Wonwoo’s thing, but if it meant having you in his arms once again, then nothing else matters. If he’s perceived as pathetic for trying to gain your trust again, then so be it.
Eyes glued to his phone screen, he observes how your grey chat bubble appears and disappears again. The anticipation of what you’re going to say next has Wonwoo on the edge of his bed, wishing he could just peer into your mind, to catch a mere glimpse into what you’re thinking.
[12:14 a.m.] [darling <3: 👍]
There’s an immediate drop in Wonwoo’s smile, he’s never experienced you acting indifferent towards him. The feeling is so foreign he has no choice but to find some way to get rid of it. You had given a sliver of hope just by texting him, and that was all he needed. Wonwoo is your best friend, he knows you better than anyone, he knows you better than Seokmin.
Apathetic towards the lengths he may have to go to to bring you back into his life, Wonwoo is determined to make you forgive him. Even if it meant abandoning his pride or his ego, he didn’t care anymore. Everything else is meaningless if you’re not his.
two.
The next time Wonwoo is forced to be in a room with Seokmin is the day Jeonghan decides to have an impromptu study session in the library. Unbeknownst to him, the person he has grown to hate would be there too. The tension was increasingly palpable to the point that both Jeonghan and Leigh found it difficult to focus on their work.
“Why are you here?” Wonwoo queried with a scrutinizing gaze.
The sound of uncomfortable shuffling is pronounced within the long pause of Seokmin and Wonwoo’s staredown. And Jeonghan gives Leigh a look of curiosity with a hint of confusion. They were obviously under the impression that the two of them were good friends, especially because no one had a clue about what happened between them.
“Jeonghan invited me to study, why? Is it illegal for me to be here?” Seokmin quipped, evidently unamused by Wonwoo’s presence.
Wonwoo scoffs, chair legs scraping against the hardwood as he takes his seat.
“It should be.”
Seokmin huffs before crossing his arms over his chest, taking a guarded stance. Various textbooks cluttered around the table, long forgotten in favour of watching Seokmin and Wonwoo bicker.
“What’s up with those two?” Jeonghan whispers in Leigh’s ear, which the latter only shrugs in response.
Wonwoo and Seokmin were lost in their world of conflict, and neither paid attention to their two observers. They were both ready to pull out bowls of popcorn amid their studying, which seemed more entertaining than whatever they were reading earlier.
“Not sure. I bet you ten dollars it has something to do with you know who…,” Leigh whispers back, obviously amused by his friends' clear disdain for each other.
“I’ll bet you ten dollars and a kiss Wonwoo did something to piss off Seokmin,” Jeonghan challenges his deal.
Leigh giggles at how Jeonghan takes every opportunity to flirt with him but agrees to his wager anyway.
“What does a kiss have to do with any of this?”
“Nothing, I just wanted to give you one,” Jeonghan shrugs.
Their conversation is cut off by Seokmin’s need to curse out Wonwoo, standing up from the table only to poke his finger into the elder's chest.
“I hope you know that if you pursue her, you’ll only end up hurting her,” Seokmin accused, causing Wonwoo to flare with outrage.
Wonwoo isn’t pleased by Seokmin’s intrepid need to provoke him. From what you texted him the other day, it’s unmistakably clear that he has the upper hand. This means that Seokmin’s vexation is only a projection of the fact that his plan has gone awry.
“Maybe if you hadn’t been such a manipulative bitch, she wouldn’t have come back running to me,” Wonwoo smirks, the realization in Seokmin’s eyes is nothing but confirmation that he struck a nerve.
Seokmin is left baffled by Wonwoo’s statement, “You seriously cannot be talking right now.”
“Oh, but I am. I may have done wrong before, but at least I know how to get her back,” Wonwoo retorted.
Thankfully, the library wasn’t traditional in the sense that students had to be quiet while using the space. Most passersby' barely batted an eyelash as the two men were raised from their seats while in a heated argument.
The bitter taste in Wonwoo’s mouth only intensified the more time he wasted quarrelling with Seokmin. There are better things he can do with his time, like finding a way for you to forgive him. But he can’t help that every time he lays eyes on Seokmin, the only thing he can think of doing is socking his so-called friend in the face.
“We’ll see who she ends up with in the end, and I’ll make sure it isn’t you,” Wonwoo finalizes.
Deciding that he is done exchanging words with Seokmin, he leaves before he wastes any more of his time. The bag hooked on his shoulder was still unopened since their fight started before he could even retrieve his things. Harsh footsteps echo throughout the bustling library, and Wonwoo makes it his mission to find you. To have you in his hold before Seokmin could even think of getting near you.
…
Three o’clock. On Wednesdays, your anthropology lecture always ends at three o’clock. Wonwoo knew you wouldn’t be pleased to see him inside the arts building, waiting right outside the lecture hall. But he had to take his chance, or else Seokmin might find a way to weasel into your life once again. Just the thought of it made Wonwoo’s ears flare red. No one deserves to have you as much as he did.
The rush of students begins to trickle into the hallway, and he spots the top of your head before you stray too far away. With a shout of your name, he watches as you try to find the voice that has been calling out for you.
Suddenly, the world around Wonwoo lacks colour as his gaze sets upon you. Standing there, you shine brightly, and Wonwoo couldn’t care less how stupid he looked while trying to gain your attention. The people around him are nothing but blockages that stop him from being able to grab onto you. Your expression is filled with curiosity as he waves his hand, beckoning you closer to him. Despite the obvious conflicting thoughts that are running through your head, Wonwoo knows you won’t be able to resist him.
As you near, Wonwoo almost sighs with content, hearing your voice for the first time since that night.
“What are you doing here?”
The two of you wedged into one of the corners, waiting for the crowd to thin out. Grabbing your wrist, Wonwoo pulls you against him. Your back is flush with the wall; the rest of the students push past the both of you to get to their next class or to go home.
“Wanted to be the one to give you a ride home,” Wonwoo mutters truthfully, but he knows that’s not why you’re asking.
He watches the way you gulp, trying not to get caught up in the heat of his body. You’re so close to him that if he makes one slight movement he could end up kissing you. The feathery breath you let out almost causes Wonwoo to forget what he’s meant to be doing. Enamoured by your soft pink lips and how the heat on your cheeks intensifies with each passing moment. He simply can’t take his eyes off you.
It seems as though you're making Wonwoo fall for you without even realizing it.
The delightful scrunch in your brow only leaves him tingling, satisfied with the fact that you two are in such proximity after everything that happened. Although Wonwoo knows he has a long way to go to gain your forgiveness, he allows himself to enjoy the smaller moments with you while he can.
“I can walk,” you retort, recoiling out of his grasp before walking over to the exit.
“Walking is fine too,” Wonwoo attested, catching up with your fast pace.
“Alone,” you reiterate.
Wonwoo is amused by your direct attempt to get him to leave you alone. He almost laughs, you should know him well enough by now. What Wonwoo wants, he gets, it doesn’t matter if you’re mad at him. He’s confident enough in himself to know that he’s capable of making you fall for him all over again.
If there’s one thing Wonwoo is unmistakably good at, it’s the chase.
With his experience, it doesn’t take much for you to be perched right back into his palm. You’re a woman after all. The only difference between you and everyone else is that Wonwoo can envision a future with you in it, which has always been hard for him to do. But with you, Wonwoo can only wish that he could live till he’s a thousand if it meant that he could spend the rest of that time with you.
“Please darling, let me take you home,” Wonwoo begs, his slender fingers grasped against your wrist. “You’re probably tired from walking around campus all day.”
He could practically see the way the gears were turning in your head like you couldn’t decipher his underlying motives, and he couldn’t help but grin at your obvious overthinking.
“Fine, but you’re giving me a ride. That’s it.”
The smile on Wonwoo’s face widens as you try to act uninterested, but he knows deep down your resolve is beginning to weaken.
three.
Wonwoo can only surmise that his plan has been taking effect. Not only have you been less reluctant to agree to him giving you a ride to and from school, but you’ve also been replying to his texts more frequently. Albeit they haven’t been the same long and sporadic messages you used to send, Wonwoo can’t seem to complain.
[5:05 p.m.] [wons <3: u got home alright darling?] [darling <3: u drove me home.] [wons <3: ik. but i still wanna ask] [darling <3: i should be asking u that] [darling <3: not that i care tho] [wons <3: sure u dont] [darling <3: i don't! now bye i have to study for my quiz tmrw] [wons <3: okayy wtv helps u sleep at night 😆] [wons <3: dont study too hard. ill pick u up tmrw at the same time ok?] [darling <3: 👍]
Smiling like a kid on Christmas, Wonwoo can’t help but feel the rush of butterflies flutter in his stomach. He can tell you’re trying to put on a detached facade, but your caring nature seems to be slipping through the cracks.
His plan to slowly reinstate himself into your life seems to be working. Even though he understands it won’t happen overnight, Wonwoo doesn’t mind waiting for you to forgive him. At least he knows that he’s one step closer than Seokmin ever will be.
…
“Good morning,” Wonwoo greets you, moving to the side to open the door.
As you slip into the passenger seat, he realizes how much he misses you sitting beside him. You were always in your world while he drove, staring at the window reading all the signs along the way, or humming softly to the lyrics of the current song playing.
“Morning,” you mumble back, settling into your spot.
It’s that time of the year when all the leaves start to fall off the branches. The pavement was littered with hues of brown, red, and yellow. Wonwoo loved autumn the most out of all the seasons. It reminded him of the smell of cinnamon and warm cups of tea. Most importantly, it was autumn when he first met you.
“You ready for your quiz?” Wonwoo decides to fill the silence.
As you turn your body, you give him a soft smile, and he knows with that expression, that you probably didn’t get much studying done the night before. He chuckles at your meek countenance, you’ve always been the type to procrastinate.
“I know that look. Don’t worry, you’re the smartest person I know,” Wonwoo reassures you.
The right hand he had gripping the steering wheel strays from its place, seeking your hold. Allowing himself to take a glance at you before interlocking his fingers with yours, rubbing soothing circles along your delicate skin. Sensing you freeze upon his touch, Wonwoo’s hands almost break out in a sweat, hoping you won’t pull away. And surprisingly, you don't.
Both of you returned to a relaxed state, and he’s overjoyed that you’ve decided to allow him to touch you again. Even if it’s something as innocent as hand-holding on the way to school. Wonwoo squeezes your hand tighter, reminding himself that you’re still beside him. That you chose to be with him.
It wasn’t long before the campus university was in Wonwoo’s view. Pulling into his parking spot, he does so without letting go of your hand once. Even when turning the gear shift into park, his hold on you has yet to be relinquished.
There’s a pause of silence that Wonwoo decides to break.
“I know it’s not going to be easy to forgive me, I’ve done so many things that, if I was in your position, wouldn’t have let slide. But I’m asking for a chance, just one chance to show you that I can be better,” Wonwoo confesses.
He observes that way you take time to think, his thumb continuing to rub mindless circles into your skin. Wonwoo didn’t think he’d be so nervous to hear what you had to say, or if you would say anything at all.
“Just be patient with me, okay?” is the only thing you end up saying.
To Wonwoo, that’s a win. You didn’t deny his request for forgiveness, and that can only mean one thing. His plan is working just as he’d hoped.
“Take all the time you need, darling. I just want to be close to you again,” Wonwoo reassures you, his voice stable and comforting. He searches your eyes for even an ounce of unease.
Nodding your head, you finally loosen your hand from Wonwoo’s. As you step out of the car you leave with one final remark.
“I'll see you after class okay?”
That was all the assurance that Wonwoo needed. He’s convinced that he’s a step in the right direction. You’ve fallen for him once again, perhaps not fully, but soon enough you’ll be back to where the two of you had left off.
…
When Wonwoo gets to see you again, it’s to drop off your cognitive psych textbook. By the time he realized it was on the floor bed of his car, it was already too late to give it back to you.
As he returns to the same long hallway, he nears your apartment with a sense of unease. Flashbacks of what happened the last time he even stepped foot into the building flood his memories. Wonwoo had no reason to be nervous, especially because you’ve become more lenient about him seeing you again. But this is different, he can’t help but wonder if you’re over that night, or you’re just allowing him to enter your life again because it was easier.
The sound of him knocking on the door reverberates through the empty hallway, and a chill shoots down his spine. Why is he so nervous? He’s been here more times than he could count, and above all that he’s only here to return your textbook.
From the other side of the door, he can faintly hear your footsteps as you make your way over. A hand clasped around the thick spine of your book, he grips it harder as he awaits your arrival.
“Hi?” you greet him with a puzzled expression.
The breath in Wonwoo's throat evaporates into thin air, his eyes glued to the curve of your body. It’s the same sleep set you wore the night he saw Seokmin leave your apartment. Trapped in his mind, he can’t help but let his thoughts wander. Plush thighs hugged tightly by your shorts, no bra in sight, allowing your nipples to outline the satin. With a tense gulp, he knows he can’t stay for long.
“H-hey, uh, you forgot your textbook in my car,” Wonwoo stutters, eyes raking over your figure.
What the hell? Wonwoo’s seen you in everything under the sun, including a bathing suit. But why does this damn sleep set have him tripping over his words?
Before he can say anything more, you move forward to grab the book from his hands. Your hair flows over your shoulder while the strap of your tank top slips down.
Shoulders stiffening at the sight, Wonwoo really can’t stay. He might even combust into a million pieces before he can get to his car.
“Thanks.”
“It’s really no problem, sorry I’m here so late. You’re—” his words are cut off by your unexpected proposition.
“You wanna come in? I’m making some tea.”
Wonwoo is completely fucked, though he doesn’t stop himself from entering your home.
As you turn around, Wonwoo almost lets out a strained groan. He had been lucky enough to cover it up with a cough. You shoot him a confused look over your shoulder, and he mumbles a curt “It’s nothing” before you can question him further.
The scent of peppermint tea engulfs his senses, your favourite. It was your routine to drink a cup of tea before bed, but peppermint has always been your go-to. He only knew this because his mom always made sure to send you boxes of a loose-leaf version from your hometown. You didn’t drink any other kind.
There’s a sway in your hips as you move over to the kitchen counter and Wonwoo’s lost in a hypnotic state. Taking a seat at the island, he watches as you grab two of the coffee mugs from your cupboard. As you move to reach for the glassware, he observes the way your shorts ride up, giving him a direct view of the curve of your ass. He felt like a pervert for staring but no matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t take his eyes off you.
“Here, let me get them for you,” Wonwoo offers, moving behind you to retrieve the two mugs. His body is perfectly aligned with yours, he can feel you stiffen against him.
A rough palm is placed delicately against the exposed skin of your waist. You’re so warm. Wonwoo’s brain short circuits and he almost forgets what he’s actually meant to do. He holds you tighter against him while the handles of the cups are hooked against his fingers. With as much delicateness as possible, he situates the mugs against the granite.
The soft “thank you” that left your lips was almost too faint for either of you to hear, but due to the stillness in the atmosphere, Wonwoo heard you loud and clear.
With reluctance, Wonwoo leaves his spot behind you to return to his seat. He continues to watch you as you prepare the tea, and he’s never been more mesmerized in his life. It was almost criminal how closely he examined your actions, but you had become so captivating. It would be rude to deny the pleasure of being able to see you again.
“This one’s for you,” you mutter, setting the mug in front of his person.
“Thanks.”
A comfortable silence blankets the two of you. Your hand around your cup, savouring the tea while you scroll aimlessly on your phone. Wonwoo allows his thoughts to wander. It almost felt sinful to be inside your apartment once again, compelling him to apologize once more.
“I know I've already said it before but, I hope you know I’m not going to let this second chance be taken for granted. What I did was wrong, and I was so angry and confused that I didn’t even think about what I was saying.”
Looking up from your phone, a frown is apparent on your angelic face. But you don’t say anything, allowing him to continue with his admission of guilt.
“There are so many things I could’ve done differently, but I let my anger get the best of me. You’re the most important person in my life and I don’t want to let you go. I know I’m terrible at showing how much I care but I want you to know that deep down inside of me my love for you is there. You’re my greatest friend and I was a dumbass for not treating you that way earlier on.”
There’s a pregnant pause in the air before you respond. Wonwoo’s nerves are spiking, but he waits diligently for your reply.
“I understand that you’re sorry. And I wish that things had gone differently. I’m sure that night was a lot for both of us. Seokmin wasn’t the person I thought he was, and it sucks that you were right but I wanna move forward. It just felt so wrong for you to assume that I was with him in that way. It hurt and it was insulting for you to talk to me that way.”
The words that had been brewing in his mind were lost as he continued to listen to you.
“What’s even funnier is that me and Seokmin kissed a couple of days after our fight. I’m not even sure why I did that, but I regret it. I probably just wanted to get my mind off you and all the other stuff. Honestly, I was so naive, I didn’t think Seokmin would go to such cruel lengths to manipulate me.”
“I want to forgive you. You’re my best friend, and I don’t want to lose you either. Seokmin had put it in my head to just cut you off, and it almost felt wrong but I listened anyway. I should’ve known why he had convinced me to do all those things. I was so stupid to believe him. But I do want to fix us, I just need time.”
To hear you talk about what Seokmin did to you, and to also find out that you two had kissed made Wonwoo’s insides churn. He felt sick at the thought of the two of you, but why? You’re his friend, he shouldn’t care about the fact that you and Seokmin shared an intimate moment. Wonwoo should only care about the fact that both he and Seokmin hurt you.
“Darling, I’m so sorry. I wish there were more ways I could show you how apologetic I am. I promise I'm going to do better.”
There’s a glazed look over your eyes, and Wonwoo’s chest almost collapses into itself. The subtle pout on your lips causes a sigh to leave his lips.
Standing up, he walks over to you, cooing as he deluges you into his hold. Strong arms pull you into his chest, the faint weeping coming from you almost kills him. He hates to see you sad, and what he hates even more is that he’s the one behind most of your pain.
“I’m not going anywhere from now on. So please darling, don’t push me away anymore. I’m gonna do everything I can to show you how important you are to me,” He whispers in your ear as he runs a hand down your hair.
Wonwoo knows how much you love it when he does that. It always calmed you down on the days you couldn’t regulate your emotions.
Sensitive to the sad things in life yet ardent towards the things you are passionate about. You have always been a softer soul, a soul that feels everything without a care in the world. At the same time, you are a whirlwind of emotions, and different colours of sensibilities, it’s your greatest strength but also your weakness. Wonwoo admires that about you. Never afraid to feel, never afraid to wear your heart on your sleeve. Everything he isn't.
That night, Wonwoo vowed to be a better person for you. He also promised he’d never let someone like Seokmin take advantage of your kindness again.
four.
Despite Wonwoo’s desire to submerge his feelings into a deep void, he can’t seem to dismiss the fact that he’s slowly falling for you. It didn’t start when you had begun to ignore him, nor did it start when you decided to search for comfort in another.
Seeking a piece of you in everyone he’s been with. It's always been in a subconscious manner, but the more he looks back on all his relationships, he’s started to realize that the one thing that was missing was you.
Falling in love with you was gradual.
In the same way, the tides along the shore would slowly pull the sand back into the ocean. In the same way, the seasons changed from summer to winter. Wonwoo’s love for you is like autumn leaves. Shades of green morph into the familiar, comforting, yellow, red, and brown. Their descent from their branches slowed, dwindling with the breeze before they ultimately hit the ground. Before he knew it, autumn had begun.
Before he knew it, he was in love.
Everything over the past month had just been a wake-up call. Slowly rising from an insomnious state, he began to find clarity in his past actions, in his reasons for wondering why none of the relationships worked out in his favour. No one understood him the way you did, and no one understood you the way he did. And he had been foolish enough to not act upon those realizations sooner.
…
Wonwoo ached to see you again. To be close to you, with your scent filling his nostrils, your warmth engulfing him, he couldn’t stop thinking about you. Yet he sat in the library trying to make sense of his pending assignment. Mingyu sits across from him, looking close to slamming his forehead with his textbook.
Wonwoo couldn’t care less about regression to the mean or whatever it is his statistics professor is trying to teach him. Every second that passed his mind would end up wandering to thoughts of you. That night in your apartment, the whiff of peppermint tea, your arms around him as he held you close. Desperation is a dangerous emotion, for it only made him want to close his laptop and rush to your side.
Why didn’t he just fess up about his feelings for you right then and there? He could’ve done it, but his intuition stopped him. From the start of you finally letting him back into your life, neither of you brought up your confession of being in love with him. The prospect of him even acknowledging the subject has Wonwoo believing it wouldn’t end the way he hopes.
Attempting to suppress his curious thoughts, he’s afraid of you denying everything you disclosed to him that night. He didn’t want you to renounce your declaration of love under the guise of anger or the heat of the moment. The only thing he wanted from you now was the truth.
“Well, you look a lot better than you did last time we were here,” Mingyu speaks up.
Taken out of his trance, Wonwoo lifts his head from the screen of his laptop. An involuntary chuckle erupts from his chest. Despite his muddled thoughts, Mingyu is right. He looks and feels a lot better than he did before.
“A lot of shit happened, but yeah, I guess you can say that.”
“Hmm, let me guess. You two made up?” Mingyu doesn’t beat around the bush.
Wonwoo is aware that Mingyu’s probably only asking to remedy his curiosity, or so he could update Kalia about the situation, but he doesn’t care. If anything, he wants everyone to know that he won you over instead of Seokmin.
“Yeah, kinda? I don’t know. I’m trying my best to be better for her though,” Wonwoo lets out a half-hearted sigh.
Mingyu looked at him with curiosity, and Wonwoo knew that expression a little too well. It was the ‘since when were you the type of person to change for a girl’ look. His friend didn’t have to say much for him to understand what Mingyu was attempting to convey.
“You’re serious?” Mingyu presses, a lilt of doubt in his tone of voice.
“Yeah, I'm serious. Never been more serious in my life,” Wonwoo scoffs, he already knows where this conversation is heading.
Mingyu didn’t seem to buy it though, eyes rolling as he leaned back in his chair. Wonwoo crosses his arms defensively, it is typical for Mingyu to wonder where his true intentions lie. His track record wasn’t the best when it came to girls, unlike Mr. Perfect across from him.
Mingyu knew how to deal with relationships, he’s practically married to Kalia at this point.
Wonwoo, on the other hand, tended to obsess for a few months before inevitably breaking things off. It’s practically second nature for him to do so, but this is different. It's you. And Wonwoo knew that meant more to him despite his old habits.
“Be for real man, I know you. Are you sure this isn’t the same as the last hundred times you’ve liked someone?”
“Like? I don’t just like her. I’m in love with her.”
Mingyu’s eyes go wide, Wonwoo has never dropped the L–word on his friend before. Not about Haein, or any of the other girls he’s dated.
“Woah. That's different,” Mingyu lets out a low-whistle.
“That's what I mean. We’re not talking about just some other girl who I find interesting. This is my best friend,” Wonwoo continues to defend himself.
It felt weird to say those words out loud for someone else to hear, but Mingyu was the only person Wonwoo didn’t feel insecure talking to despite the fact he practically criticized him during the last study session. Wonwoo needs to let his feelings out into the world, and Mingyu is willing to listen.
“Okay, you’ve convinced me, but you better not fuck it up. I won’t punch you but I know Kalia would,” Mingyu shrugs, and he’s right. Kalia would beat him up.
Wonwoo snorts at Mingyu’s remark, “Your girlfriend is scary.”
“She is. Just don’t be a dumbass and she won’t kill you. You know how much Kalia cares about her.”
“Seems like everyone does. Seokmin cares a little too much,” Wonwoo huffs, thinking back to what you had told him the last time he saw you.
“Ah. I heard about that,” Mingyu smirks.
Wonwoo could feel the hairs on the back of his neck starting to stick up. He didn’t particularly like the idea of you and Seokmin together. In all honesty, he doesn’t even want to see him within a hundred feet of your person. Wonwoo had half the mind to beat him to a pulp for how he hurt you, and he’s sure that Seokmin feels the same way about him. The only difference was that you had a clear choice, and Wonwoo came out on top.
“I can’t believe him actually. He’s dead to me,” Wonwoo scowls, hating the bitter taste Seokmin’s name leaves on his tongue.
“Dude… Seokmin is still our friend,” Mingyu attempts to mediate, like the soft-hearted man he is, but Wonwoo doesn’t care.
“No. He’s your friend. What he did is fucked up, even for me. His dumbass is not stepping a foot near her, not if I have any say in the matter.”
Hot on his heels, Wonwoo packs his belongings and exits the library with flames blazing his trail. Mingyu still sits there dumbfounded, recovering from the shock of his friend's crass declaration.
five.
[12:11 p.m.] [wons <3: meet me at our spot? i have a surprise :)]
Pacing back and forth, Wonwoo waits for you at the aforementioned spot. It’s a hidden corner on campus you two found in your first year. There were multiple wooden picnic tables scattered around the lawn of green grass, but no one seemed to come to this side of the university. It had been an alcove of secludedness for the two of you since that day. Wonwoo had spent most of his lunch breaks eating here with you when the crowds of students got too overwhelming.
Deciding it wasn’t doing him any good walking back and forth like a madman, he takes a seat at the table you both claimed for yourselves. Even with the abundance of available picnic tables, neither of you ever sat anywhere else. The table’s location had always been perfect. Right under a large oak tree that had just the right amount of shade yet a prime amount of sunlight. The leaves had already shed, and there was no protection from the rays, but Wonwoo settled in his unassigned seat anyway.
Inspecting the food he bought you, he made sure that it was still warm enough for you to eat. Two grilled pork banh mi’s with extra pickled vegetables wrapped securely within the plastic bag, your favourite.
Wonwoo had no reason to buy it for you, other than the fact that as he was leaving the library in a sour mood, he was able to snag the last two from the dining hall. Thinking about the look you would have on your face once you got here made him smile to himself. So without a second thought, he paid for the sandwiches before sending you a text.
“So what's the surprise?”
Ears perking, Wonwoo whips his head over in the direction of your sweet voice. Skin glowing in the sunlight, he admires you with a lopsided smile. You look so good today, almost too good. The black skirt you wore flounced with each step you took, while your cardigan hung low on your shoulders.
He wishes he could have you only for himself, finding it unfair that everyone else in the whole damn world got to admire how gorgeous you are, including himself. Wonwoo doesn’t get tired of looking at you, it’s like a breath of fresh air each time.
“Hi, darling. There were only two left,” he nudged his head, motioning to the plastic bag that you are very familiar with.
With glowing eyes, you let out a squeal of delight. Wonwoo knew he did something right for once.
“Oh my god. How did you know I was craving these today? I was thinking about it all morning,” you gush, rushing over to open the bag that held your most prized possession.
“I didn’t, but I know you’d never say no to your favourite,” he chuckles.
You didn’t even get to take a proper seat before diving into the banh mi.
“I forgot to pack a lunch today,” you bubbled, mouth still half full with food.
Wonwoo continues to grin, pleased with himself that something small like this brings you so much happiness. Tutting, he jokingly scolds you, wiping the cilantro that stuck to your cheek.
“You shouldn’t talk when your mouth is full darling, you’ll choke.”
Rolling your eyes at him, you swallow your food and take a sip of water before continuing with the conversation.
“I woke up late today and forgot to make something for lunch, so thank you for this, I was starving,” you beam up at him, sitting cross-legged on the bench.
“It’s a good thing I’m here then, right?” He chuckles, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear, not wanting it to get in the way of your eating.
“Yeah I guess you’re right,” you mumble before taking another bite. “Fuck this is so good right now, you don’t even know.”
Wonwoo hums, amused with your reaction before unwrapping his sandwich. Admiring his view of you, he continues to listen to you talk about how you’re absolutely in the trenches for your next cognitive psychology midterm.
“I’m so screwed. I can’t seem to properly memorize the theories, especially the one about Piaget’s stages. It keeps getting mixed up in my head,” you mutter in between bites.
“I wish I could help, but you're the psych major,” Wonwoo shrugs, bemused at how your cheeks resemble those of a hamster.
“True. Enough about school, my head hurts just thinking about it,” you sigh.
“Alright. No school. Do you have plans for the weekend, at least?” Wonwoo asks.
Your eyes lit up at his question, and you were ready to divulge what you had going on for the end of the week. Midterms were only a few days away, and everyone was so high-strung about them. Wonwoo knew you just wanted it to be over. You’ve always been the type to hate preparing for exams.
“Well, June, Lynne, Leigh, and I are hitting up Raval on Friday. We wanted to celebrate the start of the mid-term break,” you explain. “You can join us if you want.”
Before either you or Wonwoo could get another word in, his phone rings obnoxiously on the table. His mom’s caller ID flashes across his screen before he accepts the call, propping it up so the both of you are within the camera lens.
“Hi mama!” you wave excitedly, Wonwoo’s mom smiling back at you.
There wasn’t much he was grateful for in life, but the fact that you and his mom were so close was one of those things.
“Hey ma, what’s up?” Wonwoo greets her, the grin on his face widening.
“Hi, my babies. I just wanted to say hi!” His mom waves her hand at the camera, trying to stay in the frame.
“Dear, did you get your box of peppermint tea?” she asks you, Wonwoo’s gaze returning to your beautiful smile. No words could explain the happiness he felt seeing you talk to his mom.
“Yes mama, I did, thank you so much! I’ve been drinking it every night,” you assure her, sending her flying kisses through the phone.
“Wonwoo, treat her well while you guys are away, got it? I just wanted to check on you both real quick,” his mom chattered through the speaker.
“Yes, ma, I know. We’re eating lunch, but I’ll call you when I get home. Love you,” Wonwoo feigns annoyance but still tells her he loves her.
“Bye, mama! Love you,” you bid her farewell, the call beeping indicating that Wonwoo had hung up.
For the rest of Wonwoo’s lunch break, the two of you ate your banh mi in comfortable silence. There was a silent agreement of eating and just enjoying the view of the secret spot that Wonwoo shares with you. With everyone else gone, it was perfect.
If Wonwoo could have any superpower in the world, it would be able to stop time. He yearns for this moment to last forever. Enjoying your company in a secluded part of campus, where there’s no one to bother you, no one to question your friendship.
He longs for more days with you like this, away from the noise, away from distractions that cause his attention to stray away from who he cares about. He only needs one thing in his life to truly feel fulfilled, and it's you.
act three, Hold Me by the Heart.
chapter one.
Despite the reconciliation between you and Wonwoo, you still find yourself doubting his actions. Did he want to change for the sake of your friendship? Or was he only putting effort knowing you had almost slipped through his fingertips?
Warmth enveloped you every time he was around, every time he gave you small words of affirmation. Even with all these signs of growth from him, you still had that vexing churn in your gut.
That swirl of intuition felt like you were just waiting for the other shoe to drop. As much as you hate not being able to trust your best friend completely, apprehension continues to gnaw at your insides.
“Hey? You still in there?” June interrupts your train of thought, waving her hand in front of your gaze.
“I thought you and Wonwoo made up?” She continued to press for answers, which was typical of her.
“We did,” you sigh, taking a sip of your Long Island iced tea.
“Then why the long face?”
“I don’t know. Maybe I’m just thinking too hard,” you chuckle, although there’s no humour behind it.
June mirrors your expression, frowning alongside you as she pats your back, trying to get you out of your forlorn state.
“That calls for another drink!” She attempts to lighten the mood, her pointer fingers poking at your smile lines, forcing a grin to grace your lips.
Rolling your eyes at her, you agree to her proposition. Not wanting to waste your weekend on immutable thoughts of Wonwoo. He’s the only person who could make you sit around a room full of people and still feel like something, or rather, someone, was missing.
In the back of your mind, you wonder if he remembers the confession you accidentally spilled during your fight. In the midst of all the anger, the pent-up frustration, you deliberate whether he still remembers the fleeting “I love you” that left your trembling lips that night.
Before you could blink, June was already back in her seat. A tray of shot glasses filled with brown liquor. There was enough for everyone to take at least two. Although you know it’s not a good idea to get drunk with the negative thoughts floating within your mind, you choose to ignore your rationality for one night.
“Wonwoo still may be an asshole, but if he makes you happy, who am I to judge?” Leigh speaks up from his seat, knocking back the shot glass till it’s empty.
A small giggle leaves your lips, duplicating his actions and swallowing the alcohol in one go.
“So what is the deal with you and Wonwoo now? I feel like every time I see you, he’s right behind you like some kind of brooding bodyguard,” Lynne queries, ready for you to fess up.
The breath you take in is sharp, not knowing where to even start. The past month has gone by in a blur, too many events happening in such a short amount of time. You couldn’t even process it properly yourself, let alone recite all that has gone down to your friends.
“Well, I may have texted him after that incident with Seokmin. And after that, it just snowballed. He started driving me to school again, eating lunch with me, apologizing every chance he got. I-I don’t even know anymore,” you inhale, not realizing that you have barely taken a chance to breathe.
“Interesting…” Lynne mumbles, tapping on her chin as if she is deep in thought.
“He’s just become more considerate. I don’t know why he’s decided to change, but I can’t complain because I can see the change,” you continue, defending him. After all, you knew your friends didn’t see him in a particularly positive light.
There was a pause in the air, everyone sitting at the table still processing your defence. Even if they still hate him, you don’t really care. Yes, you care for their opinions, and you cherish their affection for you, but Wonwoo deserves a second chance in your eyes.
“I mean… Isn’t the reason he’s even acting like this because he hated seeing you with Seokmin?” Leigh disputes, and you frown.
There’s truth behind his statement. Wonwoo only noticed your absence because you had started hanging out with Seokmin more. But it worked in your favour, so can you even be mad?
“Maybe. Honestly, I don’t think I care about his reasons. He's trying and that’s all that should matter, right?” you mutter, taking another shot from the tray.
The looks on your friends’ faces say more about what they want to say to you than their words ever could. You’re disregarding Wonwoo’s toxic behaviour in hopes that this new chapter with him is more than just some facade.
“Oh, that’s not…” Leigh whispers under his breath but doesn’t say more.
They know they can’t change your mind.
[11:17 p.m.] [wons <3: still out with your friends?]
Your screen's brightness illuminates the bar's dim lighting, bringing everyone's attention to the bubble with Wonwoo’s name clearly on display.
“Speaking of the devil,” Lynne shakes her head as she nurses the drink in her hand.
[11:18 p.m.] [darling <3: yeahh, we’ll probably head home after a few rounds, why?] [wons <3: jw. have fun darling] [darling <3: thx! ]
“I don’t know about you guys, but I’d rather we drink till I forget everything from midterms instead of talking about Wonwoo,” June pipes up, disrupting the silence that had enveloped your group.
As she calls for someone to bring more shots to your table, you quietly smile to yourself. Wonwoo usually was not one to text first, but it’s different now. Even if everyone else can’t stand him, you can’t help but feel the exact opposite.
There’s a hum of agreement, and everything becomes a blur after that. The constant flow of alcohol forces you to focus on what’s in front of you. Wandering thoughts of Wonwoo are brought to a halt as you feel yourself slipping into a drunken state.
…
“Jun! My boyfriend is here!” June exclaims, practically walking sideways outside of Raval. It’s deep into the night at this point and your friend decided that the best person to call was her boyfriend.
As she sways on the sidewalk, your two other friends hold you up in an attempt to keep you from falling face-first into the cement. Despite how late it was, there were still cars bustling past on the street. Jun’s car idling as he tries his best to help his girlfriend into the passenger side.
The university town is still alive with students entering and exiting outside of the bars and restaurants as everyone celebrates the end of the week. You can only wish for Wonwoo to be here with you, but you knew he wasn’t the type to go to bars this late, opting to stay up playing League on his computer instead.
“Hey babe, if you want, you can call Wonwoo to come pick you up,” Lynne speaks to you soothingly, obviously not as intoxicated as you are. “You’ve been mumbling his name for like ten minutes now.”
“Wonwoo? Is he here?”
“No. But I’m going to call him so he can get you,” she gives you a tight smile.
Pulling out your phone from her purse, and bringing the screen to your face. You widen your eyes, moving your head closer to the camera. A lopsided smile sneaks its way onto your lips as it unlocks.
“Are you sure this is a good idea? She’s fucking gone,” Leigh chastises his sister.
Lynne gives him an exasperated look, shrugging her shoulders. Her brother rolls his eyes in return, both defeated. They know they can’t stop you from wanting Wonwoo, plus he’s the only one who knows the code to your apartment. You’re too drunk to even unlock your phone, let alone press buttons on the keypad of your door lock.
Hell, you can’t even stand without falling aimlessly to the ground.
“Wonwoo? It’s Lynne. Can you come to Raval?” you barely register your friend's voice, looking off into the distance. Hoping that Wonwoo would magically appear any second from now.
The call is dropped and they manoeuvre you onto the bench outside the entrance of the bar. Head flopping onto Leigh’s shoulder, you close your eyes. Maybe the next time you open them, Wonwoo will be standing right in front of you.
What felt like seconds were actually ten minutes to your slightly more sober friends. Jun and June waiting diligently beside their car waiting for Wonwoo to finally arrive as the other two are constantly trying to keep you upright.
When they agreed to have a few more shots, they didn’t expect you to take another five along with two more long islands. Regretful for their lack of heed, they had forgotten how much of a lightweight you are.
“Oh! Fucking finally, I swear he drives like a Grandpa,” Leigh scoffs, seeing Wonwoo’s car pull up behind Jun’s.
“Where is she?” Wonwoo's voice bellows, and it’s as if he’s near.
With your eyes still sealed shut, you mumble incoherently to Leigh, “It’s like he’s right here. Am I that drunk that I’m imagining things?”
“Oh my god… take her home please,” Leigh doesn’t answer your question and you’re slightly offended.
“Hey!” you pout, finally opening your eyes as you feel someone tug you away from your source of heat.
Strong arms wrap themselves around your waist, a broad chest is the only thing within your line of sight.
“Excuse me! I’m waiting for my Wonwoo to come and pick me up,” you squeak, slapping the chest of whoever is trying to take you away from your friends.
There’s a collective groan behind you.
“She’s wasted.” Lynne sighs to her brother while he nods in agreement.
“Your Wonwoo?” A familiar voice has you stopping in your tracks.
Looking up at the once faceless person who was dragging you away, you find yourself face to face with the man you had been yearning for all night.
“Woah. You look just like him,” bemused with the stranger in front of you.
Squinting your eyes, your palm traces along his structured jaw. The tips of your finger poking at his cheek affirm your suspicions. He felt very real under your touch. Every line and freckle is scarily alike to your Wonwoo.
“Like who?”
“My Wonwoo.”
The man’s chuckle vibrates deeply against your side. The same side where he has you pinned to his chest. A smug expression is plastered on his face as he watches you with intrigue.
“I believe there’s only one Wonwoo,” he argues.
“I disagree,” you huff as he pats your head, ushering you to his car.
Unsure of why you’re even following some random is beyond you at that moment. All you could think about is texting Wonwoo once you’re safely tucked into bed.
“Thanks for giving me a call, she hasn’t been answering her phone,” Wonwoo bids farewell to your friends as they start to pile into Jun’s car.
“At least you can see why she hasn’t been texting you back. We might’ve given her too much to drink,” Lynne shakes her head as she chuckles at your drunken state.
“If my opinion matters, I think I had the perfect amount,” you butt in, wanting your friends to know that you can still kind of register what they’re saying.
“Right…” Leigh speaks up. “Anyway, we’re going to leave now that you’re here. Make sure she gets home safe!”
“Will do,” Wonwoo promises, waving them off as Jun drives away.
Glowering, you take a second look at him. How weird is it that a Wonwoo look-alike exists?
The street lights that line the sidewalk cause your vision to go in and out periodically. If you didn’t know any better, you would’ve thought that the man in front of you was the real deal. But you did know better, and you would’ve recognized your Wonwoo from a mile away.
“I think it’s time that we get you home,” Wonwoo smirks down at you, reaffirming the grip he has on your waist.
“How do you know where I live?” You interrogate him, finding it weird that this man would have your address in the first place.
“That’s a secret that will be revealed later, darling,” He teases, opening the door to his car so you can take a seat.
Once he’s on the driver's side, Wonwoo adjusts your seatbelt so it’s not uncomfortable during the ride. The warmth of his arm brings you to snuggle against it, looking up at him with a coy smile.
“You know, for a fake Wonwoo, you’re pretty cute.”
“Fake Wonwoo?”
“Yeah, real Wonwoo wouldn’t come all this way just to pick me up,” you sigh, pulling away from his warmth to stare out the window dramatically.
“I think he would.”
Laughing at his statement you roll your eyes. The person in front of you didn’t know your best friend like you did.
“How would you know?” You bite back. If anyone could win the ‘I know Wonwoo more than you’ contest, it's you.
“That’s also a secret.”
Slouching back into your seat you huff out a breath of air once again, “Why do you have to have so many secrets?”
“Because.”
“It’s a secret?” you counter. You had a feeling that would be his answer anyway.
“See? You’re finally getting it,” he gives you a cheesy smile, pinching your cheek.
Slapping his hand away, you’re offended at how endeared he is with you. The only thing on your mind was the softness of your comforter and the warm mint tea that you knew you were going to have later.
“Just take me home,” you sneer, shifting your whole body away from the driver’s side. Thighs pressed against the door, your brattiness starting to peek through your insobriety.
“Hey, hey, don’t be like that,” Wonwoo pouts, lip jutting out as his eyes sparkle under the city lights.
You don’t budge, body firmly pressed against the plastic of the car door. Arms crossed as you feign annoyance at him.
“You know, I get really scared driving at night. I think I need you to hold my hand.”
With a sense of reluctance, you offer your hand to him. Unsure of what has you agreeing to his request, you can’t say no to someone so handsome. Wonwoo interlaces his fingers with yours, and it surprises you how well your palm fits into his, allowing him to rest your intertwined hands on your lap.
The ride back to your apartment is peaceful for the most part. The wistful city lights calm the drumming beat of your heart. Everything moves past in a blur; you can’t help but admire the cars driving past, time slowing down with the music lulling through the radio speakers.
Serenity is the best way to describe the time you spend sitting next to Wonwoo on the drive towards your place.
“I wonder if the real Wonwoo is thinking about me right now,” you mumble, still staring out the window.
Wonwoo’s hand still entwined with yours, he hums along with the music, the other one on the steering wheel. Initially, you thought he didn’t hear what you had said, but he ended up replying to you.
“I know he is.”
Turning in your seat, you look at him, analyzing his side profile as he stares ahead. There’s yet another frown that settles into the fine line of your face, how could he possibly know whether or not Wonwoo is thinking about you?
“You don’t know that,” you speak with a sour tone.
“I do though,” he counters with a glance towards you.
“How?”
Disgruntled at his amusement, you know he’s just going to say it’s another one of his secrets, which you’re starting to get sick and tired of. Why can’t he just tell you? It’s not like you’ll see him after today.
“Nevermind. You’re just going to say it’s a secret,” you grumble but still hold onto his hand.
For whatever reason, you become engrossed in the view of your hands linked together. His slender fingers and clean nails had you intrigued. You had a feeling that you looked silly just staring at his hand in yours, but there was no helping it.
Fake Wonwoo has nice hands.
“You have pretty hands,” you tell him, no filter left within you due to your lack of sobriety.
“Thank you,” he grins, tightening his grasp on you.
The drive felt longer than you’re used to, but you decided to blame everything on the alcohol.
“Are we almost there yet?”
“Yes darling, just a few more minutes,” he answers you, rubbing small circles on the side of your thumb.
Another five minutes felt more like a year, but you couldn’t complain. Your seat was comfortable, the heater was at the right temperature and Wonwoo’s hold brought you solace.
“We’re here. I’m gonna help you out okay? So just sit pretty and I’ll get you,” Wonwoo explains, and your cheeks burn from his indirect compliment.
“Okay.”
A few seconds pass and the door opens, his tall figure slouching down to grab you by your waist. He circles behind your back before leaning over to undo the seatbelt. It was almost too affectionate for a stranger, but something inside you had you leaning your head against his shoulder.
“Don’t worry about walking. I’ll carry you.”
You don’t respond to him, instead, you wrap your arms around his broad shoulders and hold onto him even tighter. Breathing in his cologne, you smell the familiar scent of Wonwoo’s cologne. Your olfactory senses take in the aroma of rose and pear.
Lazy Sunday Morning. It was your favourite out of all the perfumes he owns.
Closing your eyes, you allow Wonwoo to carry you inside your apartment. The sound of buttons beeping at the front of the entrance, and the warmth of his body, almost entranced you into a slumber. But you didn’t want the fantasy to end, you didn’t want this version of Wonwoo to slip out of your grasp.
Nose nuzzling into the dip between his neck and shoulder, you make yourself comfortable as he stands inside the elevator, you in his arms, waiting to ascend to your floor.
The beeping sound returns as Wonwoo opens the front door that leads to your home. There’s a sense of wonder: Would this be what it would be like if Wonwoo were finally yours?
Would he carry you to bed when you were too tired to stand? Hold your hand in his during every car ride? The thought of those things happening seemed like it would only be possible in some made-up faraway land.
“Darling, we’re home,” Wonwoo’s baritone voice brings you out of your half-awake dream.
We’re home. How bittersweet it sounds coming from the lips of someone who isn’t yours.
“Thank you.”
“Anything for you.”
The mattress sinks a tad as you feel yourself being placed into the warmth of your comforter. Your arms don’t let go of your hold on Wonwoo’s shoulders. As you stare into his eyes, the dim lighting of your bedside lamp aids in resurfacing a sense of clarity within you.
“Will you finally tell me your secrets?” You whisper, even though there is no reason to.
“Only if you tell me yours.”
There's a pause. No one dares to speak as you two continue to look at each other in silence. All that is left unspoken can be seen through his eyes, you wanted to ask. Every particle inside you just wanted to know whether there was a chance he felt the same way you did.
“Come and lay beside me?” You request, tone laced with reticence.
“Anything for you,” he repeats once again.
Lowering his body onto yours, arms still circling his shoulders, he shifts a little so that your hands are still on him. The two of you face each other while the atmosphere is left unwavering.
What you thought would be better left unsaid takes permanent residence at the forefront of your mind. Why do you want to tell this version of Wonwoo your deepest most kept secrets all of a sudden?
Perhaps you thought that if you admitted anything now, it’ll be forgotten in the morning. It was safe with this fantasy Wonwoo who had no real attachment to the one who lives in your reality. But the effects of all those shots have started to wear off, and you’re left with a very real version of the person you’re irrevocably in love with.
“You have to go first,” you speak in a hushed tone.
Wonwoo’s arms grip your waist tighter, pulling you into his chest. The arms that are linked behind his neck do the same, holding him taut against you. You don’t want him to leave. You don’t want this form of Wonwoo to disappear before your eyes.
“Well, I didn’t think it would take you this long to realize but, I am the real Wonwoo,” his chuckle is deep, the glint of amusement sparkling in his eyes.
“I think I did. I just didn’t want this dream to end,” you smile bitterly.
“But it’s not a dream? I’m here with you, and I’m very real.”
Burying your face into his sweater, you sigh harshly. This is where it ends.
“I’m sorry. It was probably such a nuisance having to pick me up just for me to spew out nonsense in return,” You’re embarrassed, hiding your face even further into his chest.
“Will you please look at me?” Wonwoo asks, his voice low, “You’ll never be a nuisance to me.”
His hand comes up to your head, fingers carding down your hair. Staring deeply into your eyes, you can feel his sincerity. The breath in your throat is caught and you’re unable to conjure up a reply.
“I know that old version of me is stuck in your mind, but I don’t want to be like that anymore. I’m willing to pick you up, no matter the distance. I wish you knew that sooner,” he vows, eyebrows scrunching as he tries to convey his feelings to you.
“I’ll tell you my secret since you told me yours. I don’t think I would be able to say this while I’m sober,” you begin to lay your heart out bare for him.
Taking a moment to think about how you want to word your confession, you grasp the hand that’s cradling your head. Intertwining your fingers with his once again, you stare at Wonwoo like he’s the answer to all your problems.
The siren-like voice that sings within your heart is finally able to release itself from the prison your brain had placed it in. All you’ve wanted from Wonwoo was for him to love you, and on the off chance he feels the same way, then you’re willing to take the plunge into the deep waters of the unknown.
“I don’t know if you remember me telling you, that time during our fight. I was–I am in love with you. I know you don’t feel the same way, I understand, but I don’t think I can be friends with you after this.”
“Real or fake, whatever you are or whatever this moment is. I’m still in love with you. I hate that I can’t tell you this without feeling scared or ashamed. I’ve loved you since the moment you came into class with your big nerdy glasses. I’ve loved you since you came back for a senior year when you had everyone’s attention on you. And I’ve loved you even when you were in love with someone else.”
Taking a breath, you stop your tangent for a moment before beginning again.
“I’ve loved you during everything we’ve been through together. Even when I chose to ignore you, I woke up every morning with you still on my mind. It was hard, and I don’t know why I couldn’t let go of my feelings for you but a part of me was always hoping that one day you would feel the same way.”
It’s done. There was nothing you could do to backtrack on your words. No time machine to take away your confession and erase it from his memory. Your heart felt free for the first time in years, and the weight on your shoulders lightened exponentially.
Wonwoo doesn’t dare speak, and your pulse quickens from his prolonged silence. The mere seconds that passed felt like an eternity, and that was enough to bring you out of your drunken state.
“Will you still love me tomorrow? When it's morning, and you’re sober. Will I still be the one you love?” Wonwoo's voice is timbre, barely loud enough to hear over your beating heart.
“Yes. Even when you weren’t around. Even when you weren’t available, I still loved you,” you admit to him.
The fingers that were laced with yours move to your jaw, Wonwoo’s palm tracing every outline of your face. The rough skin from his thumb contrasts the softness of your cheek. Memorizing every line and wrinkle, he continues to caress you, as if he was communicating with his touch.
“If you didn’t want me tomorrow, you’d still be the person I wake up thinking about. I hated not knowing whether you meant what you said,” he pauses, clarifying his jumble of words, “the night we fought, I mean. Because I heard you, even when I was blinded with jealousy and anger. I had hoped you meant what you confessed to me that night.”
The sinking feeling in your stomach doesn’t subside. There hadn’t been a day in all the years you’ve known your best friend where you thought you would hear him reciprocate the feelings you were holding deep down inside you.
“What I’m trying to say is that I’m in love with you. I’m sorry it took so long for me to realize that it was you all along. I don’t know why I never admitted it to myself, but you’ve been in front of me this whole time.”
The pad of Wonwoo’s thumb shadows over your bottom lip, your breath hitching under his touch. With soft eyes and an even softer touch, Wonwoo couldn’t take his hands off you. There was no lewd denotation behind his actions, just wanting to feel his skin against yours.
“I feel so much regret because you were always the one person I truly wanted and I never acted on those instincts,” Wonwoo confided, the weight of his words seeping into you with a profound sense of awareness.
“I’m yours, Wonwoo. That will never change,” you speak frankly.
“Just promise me you’ll love me tomorrow too,” he chokes out.
“I’ll love you even if there is no tomorrow.”
chapter two, the first day of junior year.
Before the age of sixteen, everything was a blur. Your routine was mundane, with average grades, average parents, and an even more average love life. Before the age of sixteen, there were no particular moments in all your years worth noting. It wasn’t until you met Wonwoo on the first day of eleventh grade.
Once you laid your eyes on him, you saw the potential of a new friendship. However, your teenage self didn’t realize how deep-rooted Wonwoo would become in your life from that day forward.
“Hi! It’s nice to meet you. Wonwoo right?” You greeted, your figure looming over Wonwoo who was sitting at the picnic table in the school's courtyard.
The September sun shone bright, blinding Wonwoo as he placed a hand over his eyes to get a better look at the stranger in front of him.
You explicitly remembered him eating lunch alone while playing Super Smash Bros on his Nintendo Switch. His black hair was long and covered his forehead, glasses were thick and large-framed. Wonwoo was a breath of fresh air from the other boys at your school. Unlike the rest of them, he was more reserved and didn’t talk much. His silence intrigued you.
“Hi?” he replied as a confused frown graced his lips before he returned to his game.
Deciding to ignore his introverted personality, you introduce yourself. You take out your lunch box, unveiling the spam musubi you prepared the night before.
“Do you mind if I join you?” you ask him even though you’ve already begun unpacking the food from your bag.
“Well, I guess it’s okay,” he shrugged, interested in everything but the person sitting beside him.
Peering closer at his screen, you watched with intent. The two characters fighting on a floating stage, Wonwoo spamming buttons with expertise. You’ve played Super Smash Bros before, but you weren’t as good as him.
“Are you playing Smash Bros? You’re really good,” you mumbled, taking a bite of your food.
“Thanks.”
Miffed by his lack of speech, you continued to watch him play, his triangle kimbap left ignored as he focused on winning.
“You can do multiplayer with this right? Can I play too?” you asked him, observing his gameplay over his shoulder.
He shoots you a quirked eyebrow before returning his attention to his screen. Three to zero. You found Wonwoo to be an expert compared to your novice skills.
“You know how to play?” Wonwoo stared at you in disbelief.
“Duh! Sometimes Seokmin brings his switch for spare period. I only play Cloud or Bayonetta though,” you explained.
Wonwoo looked impressed with your knowledge of the characters. He shrugged his shoulders before setting up his switch into a two-player mode. Handing you the red switch controller, you shook your head in refusal.
“Nope. I can only play with the blue controller.”
“Huh? How does that even make sense?” He scoffed but gave you the blue one anyway.
Taking the controller from his hands, you gave him a grateful smile.
“Blue is my favourite colour,” you told him, bumping your shoulder with his.
Wonwoo is confused by your outward personality, unsure of how to react to you being so comfortable with someone you had just met, but he didn’t complain. It was his first day at a new school and it wouldn’t be so bad making a new friend as soon as possible.
The player screen lit up and you quickly decided on Cloud, while Wonwoo opted to play Kirby. Smart, you thought. If played correctly, Kirby can easily absorb the abilities of his opponents.
With a randomly chosen stage, the game commenced. It didn’t take long for Wonwoo to win. He was more experienced than you were, but you had fun nonetheless.
“You’re terrible at this,” He chuckles, looking at you with a cat-like smile.
The smitten grin on your face was difficult to hide as you stared back into his eyes. Something shifted in you that day, and it marked the first time you saw Wonwoo in a romantic light. Call it cliche for falling for him so quickly, but you couldn’t help it, you were only human after all.
“I never said I was good,” you shrugged, feigning innocence.
“I guess you’re right.”
“Can we play again tomorrow?”
“Sure,” Wonwoo nodded his head, placing down his switch to get back to his food.
Enraptured by him from that moment on, you found yourself hopelessly wishing to become closer to Wonwoo. If there was one sure thing about you, it was persistence. From that day forward, you didn’t leave Wonwoo’s side, spending your lunch under the autumn sun and playing games on his switch.
…
october of junior year.
[10:00 p.m] [you: did you finish ur hw? :D] [wonwoo: yes. did u?] [you: nope :( it was hurting my brain so im watching nana] [wonwoo: nana?] [wonwoo: never heard of it] [you: omg…] [you: it’s the best anime ever!!] [wonwoo: i didn’t know u liked anime] [you: uve got a lot to learn abt me wons] [wonwoo: wons?] [you: my nickname for u obvs hehe] [*you changed wonwoo’s nickname to wons*] [wons: ok] [you: u should watch it. It WILL change your life] [wons: ok, maybe later. gotta go to bed. see u tmrw] [you: ok grandpa :p see u tmrw!!] [you: bring ur switch!] [wons: sure. bye.]
…
“Wonwoo! Wait up for me,” you hollered, waving your hand in the air even though his back was facing towards you.
Turning around, Wonwoo stared blankly as you ran up to him. Halting his steps, he waited for you to catch up. The backpack you were wearing flops up and down as you picked up your speed.
The weather was colder now, and the leaves morphed into deeper shades of yellow and red. Wind whistling as you finally reached where he stood, you gave him a bright smile, so bright that it offset the gloomy sky.
“Morning,” he greeted you.
Air knocked out of your chest, and you folded over with your hands on your knees, trying to calm your racing heartbeat. Wonwoo grasped your elbow to help, but this didn’t help your already out-of-breath state. His touch caused sparks to erupt under your skin. Luckily, the commotion caused by your run concealed your nerves.
“Why didn’t you tell me we lived on the same street?” you heaved while Wonwoo used his grip to help you stand straight.
“How was I supposed to know?” he rebutted.
Rolling your eyes at him, you knew he was right. But if you had known sooner, you could’ve spent your previous mornings walking with him to school.
“Can we walk to school together from now on then?” you batted your eyelashes at him, shooting him a sweet smile.
“I don’t mind,” he shrugged his shoulders again.
You’ve found Wonwoo to be quite nonchalant, his reactions never more than a distant stare, a chuckle, or a shoulder shrug, no in between. Wonwoo’s lack of care for anything and everything is what endeared you the most. Despite his standoffish personality, you knew there was more to him deep down. He didn’t talk much, but his actions spoke louder than his words did.
…
november of junior year.
Thanks to your English teacher, Mr. Park, you and Wonwoo have been paired up for your biology project. Not only did that mean you would get to spend more time with Wonwoo but it also meant you secured a good grade for the assignment.
Science in general has never been your strong suit, but whenever you asked Wonwoo to explain the concepts to you, everything somehow made sense.
The walk to his house was nerve-wracking. It was the first time going over to a boy’s place, and the fact that it was Wonwoo made you even more anxious. He didn’t talk much about his family unless you asked. The only thing you knew was that he had an older brother named Seongho.
“Ma! I’m home,” Wonwoo greeted his mother, and you're taken aback by how loud his voice got.
Due to his introverted personality, Wonwoo didn’t talk at school unless spoken to, and it was exciting to finally see him in a setting where he was comfortable.
His mom poked her head out from the kitchen and gave you both a warm smile. Patting her hands off the apron, she immediately pulled you into a hug. She smelt like lavender and vanilla, giving off a homey aroma.
“Wonwoo! You didn’t tell me you got a girlfriend,” she exclaimed, pinching her son’s cheek.
Wonwoos's face flared red, and he retracted from his mother's touch. “She’s not my girlfriend. We have a project to work on.”
“Oops! Sorry. You two had better get to work then. I’ll call you when the food is ready. You’ll stay for dinner, right dear?” She beamed down at you.
“If you and Wonwoo don’t mind, then I can,” you grinned at her while Wonwoo was urging you upstairs.
“Of course, I don’t mind. It’s nice to see my little Wonwoo making friends at his new school,” she cooed at her son, which had him rolling his eyes.
“Mom, I’m sixteen,” Wonwoo groaned, discreetly stepping towards the direction of his room.
“Thanks, Mrs. Jeon!” you responded as Wonwoo dragged you by the wrist, hauling you along with him.
His fingers are wrapped around your forearm, trying to get you away from his Mom as fast as he could.
The moment you stepped into his room, you found it cleaner than an average teenage boy’s would be. Your eyes panned over his space, spotting the gaming pc in the corner. Marvelling at the RGB lighting, you gasped at the clicky-ness of the keyboard.
“Woah… this is so cool!” you gushed, tapping random keys to feel the switches underneath.
“I guess,” Wonwoo muttered, shutting the door behind him.
The closed door muffled any sound from outside his room, and you were left alone with Wonwoo and the silence he brought along with him.
“Your mom is really nice,” you chirped.
Wonwoo responded with a shrug of his shoulders. Classic. Instead of saying anything more, he took the poster board out of his bag and placed it on his bed.
“We should get started,” Wonwoo said firmly.
You could only sigh at how serious he was about school. Of course, you knew the importance of diligence when it comes to projects and assignments, but you felt that this was the perfect time to learn more about your new friend.
Sitting beside him on his bed, you crossed your legs and took the large biology textbook out of the bag alongside your laptop.
“Inherited genes and Sickle-cell anemia, sounds boring,” you huffed.
Wonwoo ignored your statement and grabbed the textbook from you to look up information that would help with your project.
“Don’t you think we’re working on this too early? We have like…two weeks,” you whined.
“The sooner we get this over with the better,” he nipped, flipping the pages without a single glance over at you.
The brightness of your laptop illuminated Wonwoo’s dim room. Aside from the computer and his bedside lamp, the rest of his lights were off. Opening up the doc, you couldn’t help but sneak glances over at him.
Wonwoo fixed his glasses, pushing the frames up his tall nose. You couldn’t stop yourself from staring. There was something about him that made him undeniably handsome, your teenage brain couldn’t comprehend it.
“Y’know Mr. Park is pretty chill. We don’t have to do this all in one night.”
“I know,” Wonwoo muttered, still reading the textbook, looking for information to cite for your project.
Wonwoo could feel your eyes focused on him, but he ignored them, pretending to read the words on the page instead. Wonwoo didn’t mind that you had a habit of staring at him, but he didn’t know how to spark conversation. You were quite talkative, so he decided that it was better for you to take the lead.
Putting up with his adamance, the two of you worked on your project for a good hour before you decided that the words "sickle cell" and "genes" were hurting your eyes.
“Can we take a break, it feels like my brain is going to pop out of my skull,” you sighed, flopping against his mattress.
Wonwoo shot you a scolding expression but gave in to your wishes. And like a lightbulb had gone off in your head, you quickly got back up. Furiously typing on your laptop, you go onto the illegal site where you had NANA bookmarked.
“How about we watch an episode? You haven’t started it yet right?” you enquired, looking at him with the biggest grin on your face.
“I haven’t, no,” he answered you.
With a squeal, you clicked on the first episode while making yourself comfortable. Wonwoo moved next to you, and excitement coursed through your veins. His warmth radiated off him, and the feeling of him sitting so close made butterflies erupt within you.
Despite Wonwoo’s reluctance to take a break from schoolwork, you found him genuinely interested in the show. Nothing could compare to the feeling of sitting in silence with him, just enjoying his presence as NANA played on your laptop.
For the rest of your self-declared break, you and Wonwoo got through the first two episodes.
There was a part of you that wondered if he could hear how fast your heart was racing, being that close to him. But you felt daring in that moment, allowing yourself to rest your head against his shoulder. Wonwoo stiffened slightly at your proximity but didn’t budge. If anything, he relaxed further. So you stayed in that position, if he could hear your thumping pulse, you didn’t care.
“Well, what do you think?” you looked up at him, curious about his first impression.
“It’s good. Nana seems very naive though,” he disclosed, pushing his glasses up once again.
“Hmm, interesting. The plot gets better the more you watch, so I hope you’ll give it a chance,” you gave him a shy smile which he returned.
Any other person probably would’ve refused to watch this show with you. Knowing Wonwoo, he was more into shounen than shoujo or slice of life. Yet, he spent an hour watching an anime that was out of his usual genre. It made you feel safe. Safe enough to talk about your interests without worrying whether or not he’d find you bothersome.
“Sure. I think I liked it enough to watch on my own,” he admitted.
“Wait. Really?” you gasped, shocked that he enjoyed it.
“Yeah. At least then we have more to talk about,” he specified.
The smile on your face broadened, and you leaned into him even more as you both stared ahead, starting the third episode. Once again, he didn’t stop you. Instead, Wonwoo wrapped his arm around your shoulder pulling you closer to him.
“You’re a good friend Wons,” you confirmed.
“And you’re my only friend,” he confessed, patting your shoulder.
“Don't worry. I’ll always be your friend,” you mumbled before staring deeply into his eyes.
Wonwoo chuckled at your words, nodding his head in agreement.
“I feel like I should be the one saying that,” he mused, his thumb rubbing circles into your skin.
“It’s okay. I’m glad I decided to sit next to you on the first day of school,” you laughed, reminiscing about that warm September day.
“I’m glad too.”
After that day, Wonwoo had become more comfortable with talking to you about the things he didn’t share with others. He made you feel special. Although you had close friends like Seokmin and Mingyu during your first two years in high school, there were parts about yourself that you knew you couldn’t unveil to them.
It wasn’t that they were judgmental or bad friends; Wonwoo just brought out something different in you. Although it took a while to break him out of his shell, he continued to reveal more about himself the more time you spent with him.
The closeness that you two shared that night in his bedroom, watching NANA on your laptop sparked a flame inside you. Wonwoo took over every crevice of your mind, his scent, his touch, even if it was a mere hand on your shoulders, you didn’t want to go a day without him. Life was meaningless before you met Wonwoo, a blur of memories you couldn’t pinpoint. Now that he was with you, you didn’t want to ever go back to a time when he was not by your side.
chapter three, present time.
Sunlight pours through your curtains, hitting your eyes with a blinding sheen. The ache of last night's decisions trickles down your head and into the tense muscles of your shoulders. You can only curse your past self for drinking way more than your limit allows.
Whatever had happened last night felt straight out of a movie, especially because it had caused you to dream about Wonwoo finally being yours. As you recollect the memories of yesterday, the pang in your heart intensifies.
The oddly vivid visions of you and Wonwoo cuddling under blankets leave a bitter taste in your mouth. It felt so real you could almost smell the faint lingering scent of his cologne on your sheets. But alas, it was just another drunken fantasy you wish you could live in.
“I’ll love you even if there is no tomorrow.”
You almost scoff at how cheesy you sounded in your dream. What kind of fool speaks this articulate after countless shots of tequila?
The sounds of pots clanging brings you out of your thoughts, and you practically jump off your mattress and run to the entrance of your room. Placing an ear against the thick wood, you listen carefully for signs of an intruder. There’s a grunt that resounds through your apartment and has sirens blaring in your mind. You must’ve been very drunk last night, and stupid enough to leave your door unlocked.
There was nothing in your bedroom that could be of use to you in a situation like this. Except for the dildo that June gifted you for your birthday last year. With a defeated sigh, you decided that it was needed during this life-or-death situation. Opening up your drawer you carefully take out the pink sparkly dildo that was still left in its packaging, gripping it tightly as you burst through the door.
Screaming, you lunge towards the intruder’s large frame with your eyes shut tight, smacking him repeatedly with the phallic piece of plastic.
“Get out! You freak! Get out!” You shriek, hitting his back with a large thump.
The intruder groans in pain, the sound of his discomfort all too familiar. Halting your assault on his naked back, you open your eyes. Only for your sight to befall an extremely muscular and shirtless Wonwoo.
“Ow! What the fuck?” Wonwoo grunts, turning around to see your smaller frame gripping a bright pink dildo.
His eyes widen with recognition, adjusting his glasses, he chuckles at you and your dishevelled state. The sex toy in your hand falls to the ground as you stare at him with an expression filled with not only pure shock but horror.
Never in your life did you think that Wonwoo would be the one standing shirtless in your kitchen. The idea of someone breaking into your house seems more plausible than whatever is happening before your eyes right now.
“I’m tryna make you breakfast, and this is how you repay me?” Wonwoo laughs, grabbing the toy from your kitchen floor and placing it down on the counter.
“I-Uhm. It’s a gift! Yeah,” you stutter, “June gave me it last year as a gift. It’s unused, I promise.”
Wonwoo quirks an eyebrow at you, stepping forward, crowding you with his large chest. The counter hits your back and you find yourself caged between the granite and Wonwoo’s naked upper half.
“So you used it to hit me instead?” Wonwoo deducts, his palms gripping the counter so you have nowhere left to run.
Despite the awkward situation you put yourself in, your mind is elsewhere now that Wonwoo has you in his hold. The words that you want to come out of your mouth are clogged with Wonwoo’s bare chest, the only thing you’re able to focus on.
“W-well, I thought you were breaking in so,” you start but Wonwoo cuts you off.
“Do you not remember what happened last night, darling?” He asks you, and the breath in your throat is caught.
“Last night? I-I thought that was a dream,” you mutter, still staring deeply into his eyes.
Sighing, Wonwoo pushes the loose strand of hair behind your ear before cupping your cheek. His thumb moves languidly against your skin while you lean into his touch even more.
“No. It wasn’t a dream. I told you I loved you last night and I meant it,” he clarifies, earnest with his confession.
“I love you too,” the words spill out of your mouth effortlessly, like you were meant to tell him all along.
Grinning down at you, Wonwoo places a gentle kiss on your lips. His large hands cupping your face as he does so.
Pulling back he smiles at you once again, satisfied with the one little peck that he had given you. But you can’t help but pout. You wanted more from him, but there was a lot to address than just the feelings you two shared last night.
Like the dildo suctioned to your counter, for example.
“Why are you shirtless?” you ask, starting with the first thing in front of you.
“Because darling, you’re wearing my shirt,” answering nonchalantly as he turns back to hand you a plate of eggs and bacon.
Oh, right. You look down at the white shirt that’s draped over your frame. Dumbfounded, you mumble a quick thanks before nibbling on the food he gave you.
Wonwoo grips your hand, pulling you to sit down on the couch with him. You weren’t sure what else to say, opting to focus on the food in front of you instead. If there was something Wonwoo wanted to mention, you gave him the time to do so.
“You probably don’t remember me helping you get ready for bed. You were kinda out of it once we got home,” he explains.
With your legs crossed on the sofa, you nod, processing the information before waiting for him to continue.
Wiping the corner of your mouth, Wonwoo’s lips are upturned into a fond smile. Your cheeks grow hot as he continues to stare.
“Whatever happened last night wasn’t a dream. I do love you, I mean it. I want to be yours if you’ll give me a chance,” he professes.
All while you’re sitting there eating strips of bacon and a couple of eggs. You had been mistaken to think that last night was some fever dream because this moment is more fitting.
For anyone else, eating while Wonwoo is admitting his love for you would be odd, and out of the ordinary. But this felt natural somehow like a different version of you in some other universe has already experienced it.
“I just want to be yours, Wonwoo.” you sigh, placing your plate on the coffee table.
Inching closer to him, you place yourself on his lap, your hands circling his broad shoulders. Your head makes itself at home in the dip between his shoulder and neck as you breathe in his cologne.
Lazy Sunday Morning. Your favourite.
“I’ve always just wanted to be yours,” your voice is meek, muffled from hiding your face against his skin.
Wonwoo’s hand rubs up and down the expanse of your back, and you relax under his touch. Completely disarmed under the daze of your subsiding headache and the steady inhale and exhale of his breath.
Nothing else in the world matters to you when you’re in his hold. Outside disruptions are muted, the only thing that can be heard is your heart pounding within the confines of your chest.
Pulling back from where your head was resting, you drink in Wonwoo’s every feature. The ones that you’ve memorized and the ones you’ve missed from never being this close to him. You want to know all of him, want to feel and see all of him.
With the most delicate of motions, you place your lips over his. There’s a ruggedness to his skin, yet he feels so gentle against you all at the same time. The softness of love that you’ve never experienced before. There haven’t been many instances where you’ve got to kiss someone so deeply, yet it’s the least of your worries. All that matters to you now is Wonwoo.
He tightens his grip on your waist, pulling you closer to him, which almost seemed impossible. But he makes it happen anyway, clutching onto you like his life depended on it.
“Wonwoo.” Pulling away, you whimper breathlessly, wanting more and more of him.
The sweet sounds that erupt from you cause a groan to leave his throat, crashing his lips against yours once again. The tenderness that was evident before is overtaken by the heat of lust. Like tides to an ocean, Wonwoo kisses you with full force, and you don’t care if you can barely breathe or if your heart is suddenly going into overdrive. You’d rather suffocate in his grasp than go another minute without him all over you.
“You’re fucking perfect, darling,” Wonwoo whispers in your ear, his lips trailing down your cheek and down to your neck.
Your head lolls with pleasure, feeling him press hot kisses against your scorching skin. Tiny licks here and there that force your eyes to roll back, you find purchase in his black locks, tugging at them in an attempt to ground yourself.
“Be my girlfriend. Be mine, please,” Wonwoo speaks in hushed tones, his lips searing against the shell of your ear.
You moan out, nodding your head as his hand moves down to squeeze the meat of your ass. He pulls you right onto his hardening length, your sleep shorts leaving nothing up to the imagination. The hands he has placed on your bottom forces you to drag your hips back and forth against his clothed dick.
“Yes, I want it so bad. I wanna be yours, forever,” you sigh, mustering up enough brainpower to answer him.
Before you two could get any further the shrill of a ringtone brings you out of your lustful state. Wonwoo refuses to let you go, instead, he keeps you firmly on his lap while he answers the phone.
You can’t help but giggle at how frustrated he looks. Eyebrows furrowed with a disappointed frown on his swollen lips. He’s still hard against you, and the thought of teasing him while he’s speaking to someone over the phone seems like a brilliant idea.
“What do you want, Jeonghan?” Wonwoo grumbles, his hand moving under your shorts to squeeze you properly.
While his hand massages into the fat, you kiss up his neck while rubbing yourself against his clothed cock. His voice becomes strained, attempting to cover up the sounds of pleasure he’s emitting with a cough.
“What? You had to call me just for that?” Wonwoo seethes, yet he continues to play with your ass as he takes his call. As if you’re some type of stress ball to relieve his vexation.
“No. She’s right beside me,” he mumbles and you perk up now that his attention is back on you.
Grabbing the phone that he’s holding, you greet Jeonghan through the speaker.
“Hi Hannie!”
“Hi, beautiful. Are you down to go to my place tonight? Everyone’s coming over,” Jeonghan explains, his voice like honey.
Wonwoo rolls his eyes at the pet names, clearly unamused by his friend's flirty personality. Without a second to waste, he dives into the skin at the base of your neck, trickling down to your exposed shoulder where the collar of his shirt fails to cover.
“O-of course! We’ll see you later, okay?” you stutter, unable to focus with Wonwoo all over you.
“Got it! Don’t be late, love you!” He says his goodbyes before hanging up.
“Love you too!”
Wonwoo stops in his tracks, his eyes piercing into yours, deadly and swirling with desire. The phone in your hand is discarded somewhere on the floor before he grabs your face, pinching you with his thumb and index finger.
“You’ve got a lot of nerve baby, teasing me like that. Telling Jeonghan you love him,” Wonwoo spits, but there's amusement behind his serious tone.
“M’sorry, I’ll make it up to you later, okay? I want to get ready for Jeonghan’s thing,” you smile at him cheekily as you release yourself from his hold.
“Oh I’m sure you will,” he huffs, but lets you go anyway.
Acting unaffected, you get up from his lap, running to the bathroom to start a shower while you leave Wonwoo hot and bothered on the couch. You can’t help but giggle to yourself, excited for whatever awaits you later on.
The pain and undeniable suffering you had gone through seemed like a memory of the past. The years of yearning for your best friend are nothing but another fever dream. At least you wish it was all a dream, but now that you have Wonwoo in this reality, you don’t want to let him go.
It's almost laughable how quickly things can change overnight, it felt like yesterday you were crying yourself to sleep over Wonwoo not reciprocating your feelings, and now you have him shirtless on the couch after a very hot make-out session.
This must be what your heart was telling you all along. This must be what was beyond the dark water of the unknown. You’re thankful you took the plunge because the risk of unveiling your true feelings has given you something undeniably saccharine in return.
Kiss it Better.
chapter one.
When Wonwoo met you for the first time, he couldn’t help but find you annoying. You had a habit of sticking to his side when he chose to spend time alone, but in hindsight, it brought him more joy than annoyance.
He had always been a shy kid and preferred to sit alone at lunch playing games or reading. But when you came into his life, he realized that some company isn’t so bad after all.
Now that he’s older, and the two of you have grown together, he wouldn’t replace your presence for anyone else. There was something about your personality that made him feel comfortable. It wasn’t long before Wonwoo found a home within you, from your bright smile to your incessant need to play Super Smash Bros each lunch period. He’s thankful he had decided to let the walls he built up come down for the sake of your friendship.
…
It wasn’t long before the two of you arrived at Jeonghan’s apartment. The door was left unlocked for others to come and go as they pleased. Music was blasting from his surround-sound speakers. Wonwoo wasn’t sure how his friend was able to get away from noise complaints, but he decided that it wasn’t any of his business.
The only thing he was looking forward to was the look on Seokmin’s face once he saw that you were finally his.
Wonwoo didn’t care that it was selfish of him to arrive with you draped on his arm; he wanted everyone to know that you were off limits. He simply couldn’t wait to see the reactions that would erupt from his friends once he disclosed that he’d claimed his mark on you.
“Wonwoo!” Jeonghan calls out for him, standing by the island pouring drinks for him and Seungcheol.
His attention diverges, stalking over to his friends with your hand clasped in his. The small action doesn’t go unnoticed as he watches Jeonghan briefly glance over to your intertwined hands.
The pride brewing in his chest swells, you look irresistible and he knows what awaits him later on when you two get home. But he can indulge in his fantasy later, for now, he’ll settle for admiring your beauty in a more discreet way. Which wasn’t all that methodical in retrospect, because he can’t take his eyes off you.
Your skirt is short and the frilly lace top you’re wearing shows off your cleavage tastefully. If Wonwoo had it his way, he wouldn’t have let you out of your apartment till the sun was up the next morning.
“Hello, beautiful. You look amazing,” Jeonghan greets you, forcing you to take your hand out of his grasp to hug your extremely flirtatious friend.
The absence of your touch irked him, but he let you go, not wanting to startle the rest of the group with his growing possessiveness.
“Thank you, Hannie,” your voice muffles from being engulfed in Jeonghan’s arms.
“Alright, that’s enough,” Wonwoo gripes, clearly bothered with the way his friend is holding you.
“You’re no fun,” Jeonghan rolls his eyes, before whispering something incoherent in your ear, causing a giggle to erupt from your sweet lips.
Jeonghan lets go of you anyway, giving into Wonwoo’s sour attitude.
“You guys just got here! Don’t tell me you’re going to be grumpy the whole time,” Jeonghan teases.
“I’m not grumpy, you just have grabby hands and I don’t need you all over my girlfriend for the rest of the night,” Wonwoo grumbles bitterly, taking ahold of your wrist to pull you closer to him.
He sees the way you roll your eyes, but deep down he knows you enjoy how commanding he can become, especially with you.
“Girlfriend huh? That’s a big word for you,” Jeonghan laughs while raising his eyebrows.
“Jeonghan!” you gasp, amusement sparkling in your eyes.
Wonwoo gives the two of you an irritated look before pulling you away to greet the rest of your friends. You don’t protest the way he handles you and he takes note of that. Who knew you could be so pliant, even in social situations?
“You don’t have to worry about Jeonghan baby, you know how he is,” you murmur to him, shooting him a reassuring smile.
“I’m not worried about him, darling,” he huffs. Jeonghan is the least of his worries.
After what happened between you two this morning, Wonwoo can’t help but want you all for himself. God forbid you let Seokmin touch you the way he did. The mere thought of it made him feel sick.
He understands that he shouldn’t have thoughts about you with other people, especially because he knows you haven’t dated anyone officially before. But now that you’re his, he has to make sure it stays that way.
“Okay, but still. Just relax, I'm not going anywhere,” you reassure him.
Your gentle words and the soft squeeze you give him allow him to chill out a little more. He couldn’t help but be on high alert after what Seokmin put you through, after what he put you through.
Wonwoo has the constant reminder that you’re both here for a good time, and even though he might not be able to hold himself back once his eyes are set on Seokmin, he continues to obey your wishes.
Disappointment proceeds him as he feels you leave his side. Wonwoo lets go of you, allowing you to grab drinks from Jeonghan’s bar. Instead of wandering around like a loner, he sits on the couch, patiently waiting for your return.
“Hey, Wonwoo? Do you remember me?” a girl’s voice brings him out of his thoughts.
Turning to the person who forces themselves into the seat next to him, he frowns at her. She didn’t illuminate the room the way you did, and her voice was unpleasant to his ears.
“No. Sorry,” he kept his response curt, not wanting to entertain the faceless stranger who was attempting to flirt with him.
“It’s me? Josh’s friend. We met at Seokmin’s place last time,” she continued to press, and Wonwoo could feel his ears growing hot with annoyance.
“Oh, right.”
A hand is placed on his shoulder and he flinches away, he doesn’t want anyone but you touching him. It almost makes him want to throw up.
“I have a girlfriend,” he quips, not wanting to prolong the interaction any longer.
The girl beside him cackles, and Wonwoo really can’t stand the sound of her voice.
“That’s never stopped me,” her voice lowers an octave in an attempt to sound seductive but Wonwoo feels nothing but repulsed by her very being.
He moves further away from her, evidently angry with the way she’s coming onto him. Cursing at himself inside his mind, he should’ve never flirted with her to begin with. The puzzle pieces start to slowly align as he remembers that night at Seokmin’s place. It was that night that you went home without him, and the realization hit him like a truck.
A part of him always wondered what moment had been your breaking point, and there she was, sitting right beside him.
“I really don’t care,” Wonwoo doesn’t spare another glance, escaping her suffocating presence to search for you.
Stopping in his tracks, he watches as Seokmin comes up to you, clearly apprehensive as you search Jeonghan’s fridge for a spare Diet Coke. The music is blaring, and the sheer volume of the speakers drowns out Seokmin’s voice.
He watches as you start to notice that someone is talking to you, trying to get your attention. Wonwoo can see the pained expression in your eyes, and he can’t even blame you. Seokmin was your friend before he even met you, and he can’t even fathom the pain you’re feeling from losing someone so close to you.
Sure, he understands the depth of your relationship with Seokmin, but that doesn’t stop the fury that is forcing its way through his veins. Smoke practically comes out of his nose and ears as he watches everything unfold before his very eyes.
Seokmin is visibly trying to reason with you, his lips moving at lightning speed as you stand there holding your drink close to your chest. Every bone in Wonwoo’s body wants to go up to you and snatch you away as fast as possible. But he can’t help but relish in the sight of Seokmin so desperate for your attention. It’s satisfying to see your reactions morph from sorrow to anger the longer you’re frozen in your place.
The second he sees tears beginning to well up in your eyes is the moment Wonwoo finally decides to take action.
Marching up to you, he pulls you by the waist until you are glued to him. With a firm hand, he squeezes you tightly, staking his claim in front of Seokmin.
“I’m sorr—,” the words Seokmin so desperately wants to say are cut off by Wonwoo’s presence.
Wonwoo’s lips press into a thin line, gazing down at him with nothing but a look of disgust, and also triumph. Seokmin seems to realize he’s lost because he steps back slowly, shaking his head as his shoulders slouch with defeat.
Wonwoo has won, and Seokmin can’t do anything to get in his way anymore.
“I don’t know why you think you’re allowed to talk to her, but you should leave her alone from now on,” Wonwoo seethes, gaze unwavering.
“Whatever man,” is all Seokmin can say before retreating into the crowd.
Wonwoo turns you slightly, hand placed delicately on your cheek, scanning your features to make sure that you’re alright.
“You okay darling?” he asks, before pecking your lips.
“I’m okay. I don’t wanna be here anymore, can we go home?” you squeak, your voice faltering.
Wonwoo hates to see you affected by someone so unimportant like Seokmin.
He doesn’t think for another second before agreeing with your request. Bidding Jeonghan farewell while holding tightly onto your hand. Before either of you knew it, you were out the door and on the way back home.
The unsavoury moments that happened while at Jeonghan’s place are gone with the wind as Wonwoo speeds down the road and back to your apartment.
“Thank you for earlier, I was so in shock I couldn’t even move or speak,” you mutter, grabbing his palm and placing it on your cheek.
Wonwoo feels your warmth and glances at you pouting as you stare out at the empty road.
“It’s alright darling, you’re here now, that asshole is not going anywhere near you anymore,” Wonwoo reassures you as he takes your hand in his, giving you a comforting squeeze in an attempt to soothe the thoughts he knows are running through your head.
The moment Wonwoo reaches your building, he quickly parks the car before running to the passenger side to open your door. His hand is out in front of him for you to hold while you take a step, doing everything he can to distract you from what happened.
Once the front door of your apartment closes behind him, you turn around with a cheeky smile. It almost gives him whiplash at how quickly your mood changes.
“I didn’t peg you as the possessive type,” you remark, eyes glinting against the dim lighting of your living room lamp.
“I'm not. But it’s different with you, darling,” he admits.
Wonwoo rarely felt jealousy in his previous relationships, he knew he was in control either way. Although he knows how much you love him, he still finds himself peeved when someone other than him is close to you. There's a fire within him that he couldn’t extinguish, one that only you could put out.
“You gonna give me what you promised earlier,” Wonwoo’s voice lowers an octave, crowding your smaller frame.
He towers over you while watching the way your eyes shine over with intrigue. The image of you moaning for him is a vision he can’t erase from his mind, a vision he wishes he could replay over and over.
“Depends. Were you jealous about Seokmin coming up to me?” you press, slender fingers tracing circles into his chest.
Your touch felt like a crackling fire under his skin, Wonwoo’s thoughts were depleted of anything that could distract his awakening need to ravish you.
“I think you know the answer to that already.”
Stepping closer to you, he places both his hands on your waist, pulling you in until you’re flush against him. His breath trails against your skin as he breathes you in, wanting to memorize the sweet notes of your perfume. The smell of lemon blossom and amber engulfs his senses.
Amyris Femme. His favourite.
You have always known how much he loves the smell of it on you. It’s simply addictive and intoxicating. Everything about you is always so sweet, from your honeyed eyes to your heavenly voice, the moans you exude dripping in sugar. From head to toe, you are everything Wonwoo’s ever wanted to indulge in, wanting to experience the high of you with all seven senses.
He’s convinced that some higher power has sculpted you into everything he’s ever asked for. The universe had known all his preferences, and all his interests and bottled them up into one person. You.
You. You. You.
His.
His darling.
Cradling your cheek, he presses his lips against yours, truly savouring every brush of skin against yours. Drinking in your sweet scent through his taste and sense of smell. The longer the two of you stand there and make out, the more passionate it becomes.
Wonwoo pushes himself against you even further, until he’s sure you can feel his already hardening length grow between you.
You own him in so many ways, in ways you probably wouldn’t be able to comprehend. From his heart to his very soul, he’s yours. And he wants to show you how much of an effect you have on him. Wonwoo wants to show you how crazy you make him.
Taking the lead, Wonwoo doesn’t relinquish his hold on you as you two slowly move to your bedroom. Opening the door while he leaves wet kisses up and down your neck with the goal of leaving marks against your delicate skin.
“Wonwoo,” you sigh, your smaller hands gripping his biceps as he lays you down on the bed.
Wonwoo doesn’t rush, taking his time to strip you of your clothes. His hands breeze against the bare skin of your stomach, pulling up your top along the way. Eyes zeroing in on the black lace that’s clad against your breasts, he can feel the drool starting to pool in his mouth.
Your skirt is next, and with a hawk eye, he watches the way you lift your hips as he brings down the one thing that's obstructing him from completely devouring you.
“Please, I wanna go faster,” you whine, squirming under his touch.
Wonwoo refuses, he needs this moment to seep into his brain until it’s all he can see when his eyes are closed. The desperation emitting from you is almost tangible, but he can’t bring himself to waste a precious second.
One leg after the other, and finally you’re bare, partially exposed under his body.
Ready. Waiting.
“I wanna savour you, darling,” Wonwoo’s baritone voice reverberates against the four walls that enclose the both of you.
You sigh with annoyance and it only intrigues Wonwoo further. He never thought your brattiness would translate to the bedroom. How naive of him to think otherwise. Excitement courses through his veins, imagining all the fun he’s about to have with you.
“Just fuck me please, I wanna feel you inside me,” you whisper in his ear, bringing him closer to you.
“Holy shit, you can’t talk like that or I’ll have to give you what you want.” He groans, hooked on how sexy you sound.
The cheeky smile you give him returns, and he’s bewitched by your beautiful features. Fully naked before him except for your bra and panties.
Pinning you against the bed, Wonwoo regains control over his thoughts, the same thoughts that are screaming at him to take you in one go. He rebukes those sentiments, he knows what he wants.
He knows what you need.
“But I wanna know what it’s like. I know you wanna fuck me, so just do it.”
Wonwoo almost loses his vision with the mere utterance of your words. How much of a nymph do you become once you’re horny? Something about the way you speak is so saccharine, putting him in a trance. You could force him into murdering someone with that tone, and he would do it with a smile on his face.
“You’re gonna have to try harder than that, baby,” his voice strains, the control he once had starting to lose itself within your lustful gaze.
Thinking of ways to stop you from saying anything more, he rips your panties off in one go. Nimble fingers graze against your plush thighs, squeezing and pinching where he can.
The whimper you let out is nothing but music to his ears. Seeing you desperate for his touch causes him to focus on his end goal. He wants you to unravel before him, deflowering you till you’re fucked out and panting his name.
As he spreads your legs, he can’t help but allow his nose to trail against your inner thighs, inhaling the scent of your body emitted under the heat of his touch. He doesn’t stop until he’s at the apex of your sex, glasses fogged while the bridge of his nose is rubbing against your skin.
Wonwoo finally allows himself to dive in. Ripping the frames off his face, teasing your folds with wet, hot kisses. He repeats his actions till you're moaning deliriously under him.
“W-Wonwoo, please, fuck,” you cry out while he watches your hole clenching around nothing.
One of the hands that was holding your thighs down moves to your entrance, teasing you before he slowly inserts a finger inside you. Your head hits the pillows while your eyes are screwed shut, and Wonwoo relishes in your pleasure.
“God you’re so fucking tight, so wet,” Wonwoo mutters before licking at your clit.
Nothing is more euphoric than hearing you struggle to contain yourself. His boner getting harder to ignore as the juices from your pussy squelch with every thrust of his finger.
“Is that what you do when you touch yourself? Using your fingers to fuck this tiny hole?” He asks even though he knows you won’t be able to answer.
You’re too busy twitching from his hands on you, gripping onto the sheets to the point the threads look like they’re about to tear.
Wonwoo takes your silence as an answer before fully engulfing your cunt in his mouth. Practically making out with your pussy lips, he licks and rubs your sensitive heat till you writhe against him.
“You taste so good darling,” he mutters before taking a deep inhale of your musk, “no one’s ever touched you like this huh?”
“N-no. Just you,” you squeak.
“Good girl.”
Hooking your legs over his shoulders, his free hand moves up your body till he’s able to grope at your breasts. The feeling of the lace covering your pert nipples motivates him to make you cum faster.
Your body vibrates within his hold while he resumes eating you out. Dipping his tongue into your entrance as his thumb goes to rub your clit in sharp circles. He can feel your abdomen retract from his actions. You're close.
It’s only a matter of time before your juices begin to pour out of your pussy, flooding his mouth with sweet nectar. Wonwoo fully believes he could get drunk from the taste of your cum, the liquid gold dripping down his chin as he slurps and nips at your puffy bundle of nerves.
“This pussy is mine,” he concludes, slapping your dripping core.
Eyes drunk with lust, he smiles up at you. A smirk filled with pride as you’re left twitching against the mattress. Hair displaced against the pillowcases, skin glistening under the nebulous light of your lamp.
Your room is filled with the aroma of sex and sweat, your chest heaving up and down as you come down from your high. Wonwoo’s length straining against his pants, he can’t neglect his need to fuck you for any second longer.
Laying there, winded from your orgasm, he lets you watch him as he removes the clothes covering his body until there’s nothing left. Wonwoo’s abs and muscular arms flex as he releases himself from his tight pants. He clasps his palm around his cock, rubbing himself while staring down at your fucked out state. Grunts erupt from his throat while he rubs the bead of pre cum dripping down his tip.
You stare at him, eyes lidded, before sitting up to take off your last piece of clothing. Your breasts bounce as you release them from the confines of your bra. The tip of your fingers graze your nipples, playing with them while Wonwoo stands over you, stroking himself.
He’s so in deep, it’s the first time in a long time that he’s felt like he’s about to combust in seconds. He hasn’t even been inside of you yet, but he knows he could cum untouched at just the sight of you playing with yourself in front of him.
“Will you fuck me now? Wanna feel you cum inside me,” you plead with doe eyes, your other hand coming down to your heat.
He watches you insert a finger in yourself, pumping in and out, matching the rhythm of his movements.
Before you can let out another sound of delight, Wonwoo halts whatever he’s doing to flip you around. With you on your stomach, he focuses all his attention on your plump ass. Groping you with rough palms, and your hips fly off the bed to give him better access.
Retracting his hand, he comes down to you even harder. The slap on your skin echoes throughout your room. You squeak but he can see the juices starting to gush out of your pussy.
Fuck, Wownoo is obsessed. Obsessed with your neediness, obsessed with the way your ass jiggles with every strike he lands on you. He simply can’t wait to be inside you, engulfed in the heat of your tight walls.
“Hngh, Wonwoo!” you almost scream, your voice becoming nasally every time he hits you.
The hand marks on your soft skin drive him crazy, and he knows that if he doesn’t fuck you soon, he’ll cum prematurely.
“What a needy little thing. You want it that bad huh?” he taunts, spreading your ass cheeks, watching the wetness drip down to your thighs.
“Please, take me please,” you continue to beg, your voice level as you stare at him over your shoulder.
Your hips cant back and forth, waving your tight pussy in front of him. Enticing him to fuck you.
“You’re a fucking brat, you know that?” Wonwoo grunts, slapping your sopping hole.
Jerking forward, you let out a salacious moan, eyebrows furrowing as you slump back down onto the bed.
“I’m being so patient, baby. Just stick your cock in me please,” you fuss, lifting your hips again.
Wonwoo sighs, turning you over once again so you’re on your back.
“You’re lucky I love you,” he grunts, grabbing your legs and pulling you towards him.
Sitting on his haunches, he spreads you out, getting the perfect view of your glistening entrance. Taking his dick in his hand, he rubs the tip against your folds. You match his thrusts, moving up as he envelopes the underside of his length between your soaking lips. The sounds emitting from your bodies connecting is sinful and Wonwoo’s jaw goes slack, finally feeling your heat against his manhood.
“God, this pussy.”
“Wonwoo, fuck me,” you whimper, grabbing his biceps to pull him against you.
Engulfing you into a heated kiss, he continues to slide his cock along your slit. The sheer wetness of your pussy lubricates him enough to move with a rushed pace. He’s not even inside you yet and he’s already starting to feel that knot form in his lower stomach.
“You gonna be a good girl? Show me how bad you want this cock inside you?” he whispers, lips brushing along your own.
“Yes. fuck yes,” you pant breathlessly.
Slotting his arm between the two of you, he finally aligns his length with your entrance. He can feel you trying to get him inside you, thrusting up slightly to try and catch the tip so it pushes into your awaiting heat.
But before you can get away with your tricks, he slaps your thighs. Wonwoo’s large hand presses you down firmly before you can get any further.
“Liar. You said you were gonna be a good girl,” he spits, “don’t get impatient or I'm gonna leave you lying here without cumming again.”
You pout at his words. Your cheeks are hot, and your eyes are teary. The things you make him feel, it’s unmatched.
“Gonna breed this little cunt till you're stuffed full,” he groans, finally inserting his dick inside your heat.
The gasp you let out is high-pitched. And Wonwoo’s head falls against the space within the dip of your shoulder. His hands are firm against your waist, thrusting into you until he’s fully sheathed in your pussy. Being inside you was like dipping into molten lava, the heat of your cunt enveloping him with such a tight grip he almost faints upon entering you.
“How are you so tight?” Wonwoo curses. “You feel so good, baby.”
He didn’t expect you to be gripping his cock like this. It’s like nothing he’s ever felt before. Your pussy is made for him with how snugly he fits inside you.
“It’s so big, fuck!” you moan, breathing heavily.
Wonwoo doesn’t give you enough time to adjust to his length, even though he should. Blinded by searing hot pleasure, he begins to pound in and out of you. Skin slapping as his thrusts become erratic. With eyes rolling to the back of your head, you pull at his strands of hair and he groans at the pain that mixes with the high your cunt gives him.
At that moment, Wonwoo concludes that he doesn’t want anyone but you. For as long as he can, he wants to be the only one to fuck you, to give you orgasm after orgasm. Until you're spent and in and out of consciousness, he wants to be the only one who can make you feel this way.
As if a curse is placed on him, your phone buzzes against your nightstand. Seokmin’s contact is on clear display for both of you to see. Wonwoo ceases his movements, sitting up and grabbing your phone from the nightstand.
“Answer it,” he speaks firmly.
“What?”
“You heard me. Answer it and show him I’m the only one who can make you feel this good.”
There’s a flash of panic in your eyes, but Wonwoo knows you’ll obey his wishes anyway. He knows how deeply you’ve fallen for him. You can’t refuse him despite the compromising circumstances, and he’ll continue to use it to his advantage.
Length still buried to the hilt inside you, you swipe at your phone to answer. Wonwoo presses the speaker button before resuming his rushed pace. Bullying your hole while you attempt to at least seem coherent enough to answer Seokmin.
“Seokmin?” You whisper, trying your best to conceal the moans that are threatening to slip past your lips.
“Hey. I just wanted to call and say sorry about earlier. That was stupid of me—,” Seokmin attempts to get his apology in but he’s cut off by your moans.
Wonwoo slaps your clit while thrusting inside you, his length enveloped in your velvety walls.
“You okay?” Seokmin asks you, and Wonwoo’s satisfied by the scene in front of him.
You’re flustered and trying your best not to reveal that you’re being fucked hard by your boyfriend, while your ex-friend is trying to reconnect with you. Key word, trying.
“Tell him you don’t want to ever see him again,” Wonwoo grunts out as he continues to fill you up deliciously, thrusting inside you hard enough that Seokmin could probably hear it over the phone.
“Fuck! Wonwoo! ‘M sorry Seokmin, but I don’t want you to talk to me anymore. Please, don’t contact me again.” Whimpers escape your lips and Seokmin stutters over the speaker.
Wonwoo knows that Seokmin is aware of what’s happening on your side of the phone call. The line goes dead the moment you utter your last words to him.
“Bet you liked that huh? You like it when I show everyone that you’re mine?” Wonwoo emphasizes while he continues to push past your entrance.
“Yes. Shit,” you mewl out, clenching your walls against his thick cock.
The ridges of your pussy massage Wonwoo in the most perfect way. Throwing his head back the slightest bit, he watches how his dick moves in and out of you. The creamy ring of your mixed juices pooling at the end of his hardness only arouses him further.
“You gonna let me cum inside you?” Wonwoo questions, not to ask, but to make sure you’re prepared to feel his seed seeping into you.
“Mhm. I wanna feel you fill me up,” you let out a breathy moan.
Tossing you onto your stomach, Wonwoo pulls out and grapples you into the position he wants you in. Clutching onto your hips, he sits on his heels while forcing you onto his thighs. Your back against his chest, head lazing back onto his shoulder while Wonwoo’s muscular bicep wraps around your neck, placing you into a headlock.
Entering your abused cunt once again, he assaults your pussy with enough force and strength to send you into another dimension. Wonwoo bounces you on his cock and you’re screaming his name at this point. His balls slap against your ass cheeks, while the juices from your hole drip down and onto his thighs.
“I-I’m gonna cum,” you wail, your walls spasming.
Wonwoo's balls retract while your pussy pulsates, your cum coating his dick. He pumps into you one more time until his sticky release fills your walls. The flood of semen overflowing while his red tip kisses your cervix, holding you firmly in place as he continues to cum inside you.
“Hmph, it’s so good. Your cock feels so good,” your words are slurred as Wonwoo releases you from the headlock.
Body slumping over, you push your ass in the air, giving Wonwoo the most delectable view of his cum overflowing past the lips of your bruised cunt. The thick white substance comes out in globs as you lay down with your legs spread.
Wonwoo can feel the twitch in his cock, almost coming back to life as he watches your little pussy push out his cum.
“You were so good darling, so good for me,” he mutters, kissing your temple as you lay there spent and exhausted.
“Fucking love you and your big cock,” you mutter, turning around to kiss him passionately.
Pride blooms within his chest, knowing he was your first. The elation Wonwoo feels is comparable to when you confessed your love for him.
He’s finally won. You’re his, and he can’t wait to show you how much he loves you every chance he gets. Not only by fucking your brains out but also with dates and random acts of affection. He can’t wait to show you off, to let the world know that you’re his best friend and girlfriend.
“Gonna clean you up okay? Then we can take a shower,” he imparts, wrapping you up in your blankets so you don’t get cold.
“Wonwoo?”
“Yes, baby?”
“I love you,” you call out, smiling at him lazily, your eyes tired but full of fondness.
“I love you, too.”
…
Wonwoo woke up that morning feeling refreshed. The sunlight beaming down on him through your curtains. Your nude body is pressing into him. He loves how he can observe you so closely, taking note of every line and freckle on your skin. The rays of the sun hit you, causing your skin to glow beautifully. Your breath steady as you sleep peacefully, curled against his side.
Wonwoo doesn’t know how long he was lying there admiring you and how gorgeous you are, but his excitement spiked when you began to stir.
“Good morning darling,” he whispers wistfully in your ear.
The smile that tugs along your lips makes his heart flutter, and he swears he’s never felt this whole in so long. He can’t remember the last time he felt happiness in its true form. The closest thing that made him experience this type of joy was that night in his bedroom watching NANA with you when you two were still in high school.
“Morning,” your voice is sickly sweet, enough to have him grinning at such early hours in the day.
Shifting from your spot, you prop yourself up using your forearms, hair moves swiftly with your movements.
“Sleep well?”
There’s a shy smile on your face, eyes twinkling with the sunlight, and Wonwoo can only presume that it was you recollecting the memories of last night.
“The best,” you mumble, leaning in to peck his lips.
What was meant to be an innocent peck turns into something more heated. Wonwoo grabs you so you’re sitting on his lap, a squeak erupting from your throat as he manhandles you.
“Wonwoo!” you yelp, slapping his bare chest.
He doesn’t respond to your dumbstruck reaction, instead, he continues to kiss you, harder than before. That morning he woke up a victim to morning wood, and the only way he could even fathom relieving himself was to fuck you senseless.
The angle he has you in is sinful, your bare cunt rubbing against his length, his hands firm on your hips, rubbing your folds against the underside of his cock.
Your head is thrown back, submitting to the pleasure that Wonwoo continues to give you. Removing his hands, he lets you move on your own accord while he focuses on your breasts. His large hands squeeze the flesh, pinching your nipples till your eyebrows are strewn tight.
“Oh fuck…,” your voice trails, your head coming down, entranced by how Wonwoo’s hardness slides between your pussy lips.
Wonwoo groans, trying his best not to cum from how wet you’ve become from a little bit of foreplay. It almost feels like he’s still dreaming, watching your hips sway against him. The fuzzy feeling in his brain doesn’t cease, the same fuzziness he felt last night while you were under him, screaming his name.
“You like that, huh?” He mutters against your skin, trailing kisses all over your chest.
The same hands that were fondling your round breasts come down to your ass, lifting you. There is a whine that leaves you, and Wonwoo can feel your disappointment from the loss of contact.
The whine you let out dies quickly as Wonwoo forces you down on his erect cock, pushing your hips till you’ve fit the whole thing inside you. The breath is knocked out of his throat as your warm walls welcome him back into your heat. Being inside you is life-changing, his hand dull in comparison to the feeling your tight hole gives him.
“So big,” is all you can say.
“Wanna see you ride me, baby,” he breathes out, trying to centre himself so he doesn’t spurt his cum inside you before you even get to move.
Your fingers dig into the skin on his shoulders, and slowly, you lift yourself off him before slamming back down. Wonwoo grunts at your speed, not expecting you to use so much force.
“Shit. Slow down darling,” he sputters, trying to control the way you're bouncing furiously on him.
“I don’t wanna, it feels too good,” you pout, staring down at him with the most lewd expression.
Your jaw goes slack, panting for him like a dog in heat. He can feel your walls clench with each stride you take and the words he had on the tip of his tongue evaporate into thin air. He knows if he allows you to continue he won’t be able to savour you on top of him.
Instead of flipping you on your back, Wonwoo’s arms wrap around you, bringing you close to his chest. His feet are planted firmly against the mattress, he holds you tightly before fucking up into your delicious cunt.
“This pussy is fucking mine,” he growls, emphasizing his words with each thrust.
“Baby, I-I can’t, I wanna cum,” you sob, tears of pleasure running down your cheeks.
“Cum for me darling, give it to me,” and as if on command, you do exactly that.
Wonwoo’s palms drift to your ass, spreading your cheeks, squeezing them tight as he forces you to match his pace. Almost blinded by the sheer pleasure, he pumps into you a few more times before his semen floods your insides, thick and warm, it mixes with the nectar dripping from your heat. As he releases, he keeps his hands firmly on your waist, plugging you to ensure none of his cum spills out.
The two of you lay like that for a while, catching your breath after Wonwoo had fucked your brains out. Again. In all honesty, he’s convinced that he’ll never get tired of fucking you.
“I don’t think I’ll be able to walk tomorrow,” you sigh, voice muffled as you rest along the slope of his shoulder.
“So we can’t go again?” Wonwoo asks, feigning innocence, “Hey! Ow!”
The playful slap you give him on his bicep stings as he chuckles at your wordless response.
“No more,” you refuse his request.
“Oh, Wonwoo! You’re so big!” he imitates your voice from earlier, teasing you until you beg him to stop.
Propping yourself up, his flaccid cock slips out of you, the cum spilling onto his abdomen.
“You fucker!” you hit his chest again and Wonwoo erupts into a fit of laughter.
“Oh baby, this pussy is mine.” Your voice lowered in multiple octaves, copying the words he spoke out of lust, “Not so funny now, is it?”
Wonwoo continues to crack up at your embarrassed state, eyes turning to slits as he tries to calm himself down.
“Actually, it’s pretty funny,” he attests, grabbing your chin to kiss your cheek.
“Fine. I won’t say anything while we’re doing it anymore.” You complain, but he knows you secretly love it.
Wonwoo quirks an eyebrow up at you, in love with your playful side. Still sitting on his lap naked while you’re bickering with him is just as hot as you riding him with your boobs in his face.
“That wouldn’t stop me,” he shrugs, pretending to act nonchalant.
The best part of fucking you is how vocal you are, and it drives him insane.
“Whatever you horny loser,” you roll your eyes.
Grabbing your arms he pulls you down against him again, kissing your neck, and he can feel you relax under his touch.
“Says the one who has a massive dildo in their drawer,” he whispers in your ear before falling back onto the mattress, chuckling at your dumbfounded state.
“I’ve already told you! It was a gift from June and it's unused,” you huff, emphasizing the word unused.
“Sure it is,” he drawls, not convinced.
“I'm serious! I literally took it out of the box before beating you with it.”
“Whatever you say, darling,” he snickers before enveloping you in his arms, “let’s use it next time, yeah?”
For the rest of the day, you both lay there, talking about the most random things after a long but steamy shower. With fresh sheets on the bed, the atmosphere is filled with nothing but warmth and utter joy.
This past month or two has been a whirlwind of realizations. Realizations that have shifted the world around him into something beautiful. If someone had told him at the beginning of the school year that he would find a new meaning of love in you, he would’ve laughed with disbelief. But now that you’re here, sitting beside him with the most angelic smile on your face, he recognizes just how much comfort a single person can bring. Not even the fresh air that breezed through his fingers or the scent of the salty water misting its way onto the shore while he visited his hometown could outweigh the feeling of tranquillity that he got when he was with you.
Even though he regrets not confronting his feelings for you sooner, he can’t find a reason to complain. Everything had fallen into place, and for the first time since he was seventeen, he realized that the one person he was searching for was in front of him this whole time.
epilogue.
freshman year of university.
[8:56 p.m.] [you: raval tonite w junepi and the others?] [wons <3: yeah but can we leave early? i wanna play league after :)] [you: is this u tryna get out of drinking by being my dd?] [wons <3: maybe] [you: fineee but we leave at 12] [wons <3: anything for u darling] [you: darling?] [wons <3: u like it?] [you: yes!! its cute hehe] [wonwoo has changed your nickname to “darling <3”]
the end.
⊹ a/n: thank you for reading this story! this thing is my baby and i would love to hear your thoughts :) i appreciate everyone who took their time reading it because i poured my whole heart into it :") thank you again and see you in the next fic ♡ please rmbr to reblog and share your thoughts :3 it motivates me to continue writing stories like these for u ♡
#jeon wonwoo#seventeen smut#wonwoo smut#svthub#thediamondlifenetwork#Hiraya-M#seventeen fic#wonwoo x reader#seventeen imagines#seventeen fanfic#svt fic#svt smut#svt fanfic#wonwoo#seventeen scenarios#seventeen angst#wonwoo fanfic#wonwoo seventeen#svt imagines
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Question 6 anon here, obvs u rlly don't have to but if u wanna argue w/ my comment pls do argue, if I'm full of shit I wanna hear it 👍 This question has been driving me up the wall for years I just want to know why ppl all seem to agree fandom racism is bad and agrees with all the arguments and yet everything's still so racist and would appreciate different perspectives
I just think that the idea you have, that the people who are racist and aren't don't hang in the same circles, is just fundamentally not true.
Like sure, Trumpers might not click on my blog to learn about designing Black characters lol. But a good majority of the antiblackness I've seen on this website has come from people who swear they're liberal or progressive or fight for some cause for something that they deem important... And then just don't apply that grace and logic to Black people. So you'll see people saying intelligent things... and hate negroes 🤣. And then you'll see those people being reblogged en masse by people who agree with their good takes... And maybe don't know about the antiblackness they were just spewing. Not that you can tell who does and doesn't, out of the tens of thousands.
So yes, y'all do hang in the same circles. Yes, the people who need this page very much are also people around you. We have to stop acting like they aren't. I have mutuals who reblog people that I won't follow, simply because I've seen those people keke-ing it up with antiblack, whitewashing bloggers. Even the distant connection there is enough for me to be like "nah, unfortunately I can't kick it with you", even though we're in the same fandoms and such.
Essentially, the call is more often coming from inside the house, and the unwillingness to approach it from within because "oh I'M not racist" is preventing it being answered. Every antiblack sentiment you see in fandom isn't gonna look like an overt slur. It's gonna be in the way people perceive and treat Black characters versus others, in the way they treat Black character design, the way they allow others to slide when they are racist because "their art is cool". That tolerance I've been talking about? That's where you see the line for people, and it's so much closer than folks think.
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Hey yall I dont wanna damper anyones day but @bellaaldamas brought to my attention that trolls potentially messed with Angrb*da’s searches on google to flood it with only mentioning the wh*tew*shing m0d that got deleted back when the PC version came out. This might very well be the case since prior to that, it wasnt ONLY mentioning the mods or mentioning something like that AT ALL. Not to mention the wh*tew*shing m0d picture is one of the main images you see if you search her up. What the actual fuck. Its bad enough theres troll activity or just negativity when you search her up regardless but this is next level deranged. What really confuses me so much is that most people literally dont know, care or even like this mod as much as these trolls are pushing so what exactly is the goal and did they think nobody was gonna notice either?
Maria found more info and apparently you cant even put the mod in the game. The only point of it was to be a model of anti-woke/sweet baby inc. similarly to that of the horrendous angrb*da facetune that predates it 😐 it serves no purpose outside of it being a model so it was literally a FAIL and come to find out, the creator of the mod doesnt even know or care about god of war. WTF.
#If you saw a post like this prior to today no you didnt.#I would NOT have cared about any of this had it been some obscure website by the way. I dont want to give any attention to shit like that#Also left the reblogs off and censored stuff just in case sorry guys EDIT: i put it on for now#all of this over a FICTIONAL CHARACTER.#how are you that mental?#Imagine going the extra mile over a 14 y/o video game character who is not even that popular to begin with but is enough#To hurt your feelings because you find it outrageous that shes black and atr*us’s girlfriend.#And now after the election everyone acts like they are allowed to be weird like girl im not allowing shit tf 😂#We have been literally trying to reverse the results since we learned of it because why?#At this point the people that love to shit on her are her fans because no way youre “bitter” that shes black and still think about her#3+ years since her reveal.#If you really hated her that much you wouldnt do all of this theres just no way#Not putting their tags in.#god of war ragnarok#god of war
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First off, the theme for your Christmas event looks SO CUTE‼️‼️ whenever you like, could I please get inumaki and mistletoe (nice)? If you don’t write for him then sukuna would also be lovely. Happy early holidays!!
you’ve received a gift! ⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆ want your own gift? ・:〃➜ click here!
"what in all hell are you doing now?" SUKUNA’s voice cut through the living room, deep and sharp, as you balanced precariously on your tiptoes, reaching for the corner of the doorway. your hands gripped a small sprig of mistletoe, determination etched on your face.
“decorating,” you replied simply, grunting as you strained for the spot. “it’s tradition.”
“tradition, my ass,” he muttered, arms crossed as he leaned against the wall, watching you with a mix of disdain and reluctant amusement. “this entire holiday reeks of idiocy. hanging weeds in doorways? for what purpose?”
you turned to glare at him. “it’s mistletoe! and you’re supposed to kiss under it. it’s romantic!”
his eyebrow twitched. “romantic. humans truly will find the most asinine excuses to lock lips.”
you huffed, stepping back to assess your failure. the spot was just out of reach, and no amount of stretching was going to help. sukuna sighed loudly, clearly basking in your frustration.
“perhaps you should consider that your ridiculous traditions weren’t made for those of your stature.”
“well, maybe if someone taller helped,” you shot back, narrowing your eyes at him.
he smirked, sharp and mocking. “and soil my hands with this nonsense? no, thank you.”
you grumbled, stepping onto a nearby stool in a last-ditch effort. he watched as you wobbled dangerously, mistletoe still clutched in your determined grip. “if you break your neck over this stupidity, i’ll not be held responsible,” he drawled, though there was a flicker of something softer in his eyes as he stood straighter, ready to catch you if necessary.
then, without warning, he moved, snatching the mistletoe from your hands with a single swift motion. you blinked, startled, as he held it aloft, dangling it above the two of you.
“what are you —”
“if you insist on this absurdity,” he muttered, his voice low, “then allow me to do it properly.”
before you could respond, he tugged you closer by the waist, his other hand still holding the mistletoe overhead. his lips crashed onto yours, firm and demanding, leaving no room for protest. the kiss was intense, stealing the breath from your lungs, and for a moment, you forgot all about your mission to decorate.
when he finally pulled back, you noticed the faintest hint of a smile tugging at the corner of his lips, though he was clearly trying to suppress it.
“there,” he said, his tone dripping with mockery. “is that sufficient for your foolish tradition?”
you blinked up at him, breathless. “that was —”
“don’t say anything,” he interrupted, tossing the mistletoe onto the nearby table. “and if you attempt to hang that wretched thing anywhere else, i shall burn it.”
but as he turned to leave, you caught the tiniest glimmer of amusement in his crimson eyes. for all his complaining, you could tell he didn’t hate it as much as he pretended. in fact, you’d even wager he enjoyed indulging you — just a little.
produced by creamflix on tumblr. all rights reserved. do not copy, steal, modify, repost — support your writers by liking and reblogging. ♡
#jjk drabble#jujutsu kaisen drabble#jjk fluff#jujutsu kaisen fluff#jjk x reader#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jujutsu kaisen x fem!reader#jjk x fem!reader#jjk x female reader#jujutsu kaisen x female reader#jjk x y/n#jujutsu kaisen x you#sukuna drabble#ryomen sukuna x male reader#sukuna x male reader#ryomen sukuna x reader#sukuna x you#sukuna x reader#ryomen sukuna x gn!reader#ryomen sukuna x female reader#ryomen sukuna x you
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Yeah let's not do this for 3 months people. He's not leaving! We're at the beginning of Buddie!!!
Q. I'm so confused by all the excitement, and I admit that I struggle with facial awareness, but all we got was Eddie saying he's leaving so that feels way more like a Ryan exit than a beginning to Buddie. What did I miss?
A. Okay I'm going to say this once, and only once. We are not spending 3 months on a nonstarter spiral. Ryan is not leaving. It's not an exit story. It's the beginning of a feelings realization story, only Eddie hasn't quite arrived at the starting point for his part yet. Lots of people struggle with facial cues, anon, and there's nothing wrong with that, but it's not an exit storyline. It's drama set up to kick start Buck's spiral and to bring Christopher home. That's why I loved that they had Buck on the couch and Eddie in the kitchen. The couch has kind of always been used to symbolize a romantic relationship between Buck and Eddie, both of them being home when they're on that couch, so putting Buck on the couch in that scene basically puts Buck in position. Buck has arrived at the start of his realization arc. The box has been opened (the box being his long unexamined feelings for Eddie) and he won't be able to put the lid back on it this time. The moment we see Buck have at the end of the episode was not his 'oh Eddie's my person' moment but it was the start of Buck's journey to that realization. Buck was devastated in that moment, but for the sake of Eddie, he attempted to fake enthusiasm. Eddie being happy means more to Buck than his fear of being left behind, again. But that fear will come out when the season returns in March. Tim basically confirmed that Buck will spiral and he will throw himself into a distraction to try and block his pain. That distraction will inevitably fail, as Tim also already spoiled (they learned their Tommy lesson and they won't be repeating it), and that will force Buck to once and for all have to confront and figure out why the thought of losing Eddie sends him spiraling. The end of the episode was the beginning of Buck's journey.
Eddie hasn't reached his starting point, yet. But having him in the kitchen, the other big Buddie room, was a way to show that he is close. Framing the shot the way they did, Eddie having a straight line of sight to Buck on the couch, was intentional. Eddie is close but he's not there yet. He's distracted by the whole Christopher thing, as he should be. Eddie won't be able to arrive at his starting point until he gets the Christopher situation settled. That entire scene was LOUD. Buck letting himself in using his key. Eddie not being able to look at Buck when talking about moving. The flirty way Buck asked what he was watching on the iPad, fully believing it was porn. And again the way the entire scene was framed and shot. The close up of Eddie's face when he realizes he's not alone in this moment and that he does have someone in his corner. Then the close up of Buck's face when he allows the mask of enthusiasm to slip and we see the real sadness that he is feeling. It was very clearly the beginning of their storyline. It was in no way shaped, framed or written as the beginning of an exit storyline. It's happening, anon. Let yourself enjoy the build up 💗
Thank you Nonny! Much appreciated!
YES to all that Ali talked about here! Let's be happy you guys. We are finally here after 7 very long years of ups and many downs. This is the first time we've actually gotten real confirmation that the Buddie slow burn is on!
Let's enjoy this break before the show comes back, because I anticipate a lot of drama in 8b. And once the show is back on? Let's just sit back, relax and watch Buddie's story unfold. It'll be glorious!
Heads up! For anyone who is giving me the shifty eyes for reposting Ali's updates instead of reblogging. Read this.
Remember, no hate in comments, reblogs or inboxes. Let's keep it civil and respectful. Thank you.
If you are interested in more of Ali’s posts, you can find all of her posts so far under the tag: anonymous blog I love.
#anonymous blog I love#nonnies galore#buddie#eddie diaz#evan buckley#buddie speculation#season 8 speculation#911 speculation#911 abc
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Love That Burns ~ Ending 1 ~ 36
LOVE THAT BURNS MASTERLIST
< previous chapter
Word Count: 2,245ish
Summary: Logan has a plan to surprise you. What could possibly go wrong?
Warnings: character returns from the dead
Notes: Check out the Everyday Moments Masterlist for more moments of our favorite couple! Also, the chapter numbers will continue from the main storyline.
Reminder: I DO NOT do taglists. Please don’t ask. Please follow and interact! I appreciate any reblogs, likes, comments, and asks!
To say Logan was nervous was an understatement. First off, he hated flying. Second of all, he had never planned a trip like this before, let alone by himself. You had been pestering him for years about going on a vacation, a true vacation, but he always found an excuse to brush it off. Now that your anniversary was nearing, Logan wanted to do something special for the two of you. Logan was going to surprise you with a ten day trip to Hawaii. He had rented a small house with a private beach for the week, just the two of you. He could only hope that you’d like it.
It was a Saturday, so Logan wasn’t working. You had slipped out to run some errands by yourself , allowing Logan to prepare how he was going to tell you about the trip. He had bought a new swimsuit for you, something he hoped you would like in his favorite color to see you in. He placed it in a bag and set it on the counter.
Anxious about the present, Logan waited for you outside, keeping himself busy with chopping wood and working on his bike. When his ears picked up the sound of the truck, Logan quickly set the tools down and wiped his hands clean on his jeans before standing to meet you.
You smiled as you caught sight of Logan waiting for you outside. You parked the truck and Logan was there in no time, opening your door.
“Hey, sweetheart,” he greeted, leaning forward and meeting your lips for a brief kiss.
“Hey, honey,” you replied. “You been waiting for me?”
“Maybe.” He smirked. “What can I grab?”
“Everything’s in the back seat.”
“I’ll grab everything. You head inside.”
“Are you sure? I can–”
“Go. I can handle a few grocery bags.”
You kissed his cheek before heading inside. It didn’t take you long to notice the gift bag sitting on the counter. “Uh, Logan? What’s with the bag?”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” he responded, coming in with all the grocery bags.
“So you won’t mind me taking a look inside then?”
He shrugged. “Nope.”
With curious eyes, you peeked into the bag and pulled out the new swimsuit. You held it up, studying it, before peeking back into the bag. There was nothing else in it.
“Thanks, honey,” you said, trying to mask the utter confusion you were feeling. “I needed a new swimsuit?”
“Fuck, I didn’t think this all the way through,” he muttered.
“What is going on, Logan?”
He sighed, running a frustrated hand up his face and through his hair. “I’m taking you to Hawaii.”
The swimsuit dropped to the ground. “What?”
“Tomorrow. You and me. Hawaii.”
“You–You’re serious?”
“Very.”
You squealed and jumped up into Logan’s arms. He caught you with a laugh as your arms wrapped around his neck and your legs wrapped around his torso.
“Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!”
Logan pressed a kiss to your neck. “You’re welcome, sweetheart.”
You pulled your head away enough to look at him. “Are you sure you can handle it? I know how you feel about flying and not to mention the water. Do you–”
Logan shut you up with a kiss. “Your reaction sealed the deal, baby. I’ll be fine.”
“You sure?”
“I’m the one who planned it, didn’t I?”
“Yes, but–”
“Nope. We’re going.”
You squealed again, going back to hugging him tightly. “I love you so much!”
He chuckled in your grip. “I love you more.”
~~~
Logan knew he had made the right choice as he watched you bounce around the airport. He couldn’t help but watch you with a loving smile. You were so excited that it was becoming contagious. It was helping but his anxieties at ease, especially since he had a few more surprises up his sleeves once you two reached Hawaii.
“Oh, Logan! Let’s–”
He quickly grabbed your hand and pulled you into him. “No more stops, sweetheart. We haven’t even gone through security yet. We can explore more once we’re past that.”
“Oh. Right. Let’s go!”
Logan laughed as you tried to tug him along. He willingly followed you to the security line. To distract himself from the oncoming pat down he would be forced to have, he wrapped you up in his arms and held your back against his chest. He also needed to make sure you didn’t happily wander off before you hit security. You leaned back into him, completely content with him holding you still as you waited in line.
“Are you guys newly weds?” A kind old lady asked as she stood behind you in line, watching you and Logan.
“No,” you responded with a smile. “We’ve been married for a few years now and have been together for even longer.”
“Well, it’s nice to see two young people such as yourselves so happily in love still.”
You and Logan had to bite back a laugh. If only this woman knew that Logan was 183 and you were 85. You were probably older than the woman herself.
“Thank you, ma’am,” Logan responded. “I got lucky.” He kissed your temple as you melted into him.
The lady smiled and looked at you. “You’ve got yourself a keeper there, dearie.”
You patted Logan’s arm that was around you. “Yes, I do,” you replied before meeting his lips for a kiss.
When you reached the security checkpoint, you gave Logan another kiss.
“I’ll be right in front of you,” you told him, knowing that he hated situations like this.
“Okay,” he responded, sneaking another brief kiss before he let you go.
He watched as you walked through the checkpoint with ease before turning around to wait for him. You shot him a smile as he stepped toward the TSA agent.
“I’ll take the pat down,” Logan stated.
The agent turned to his colleagues, “opt out.”
Suddenly, the coins and all other metal objects around begin to shake and float up. You and Logan are seemingly the only ones who seem to notice. You gasp as you realize who is standing behind Logan. Seeing your concern, Logan draws out his claws and spins around but was stopped before he could do any harm.
“What do you want?!” Logan asked as Magneto lifted his head.
Without even thinking, you rushed back through the scanner and place yourself between Logan and Magneto, flames ready in your hands.
“There are dark forces, Wolverine, Ember,” Magneto responded, still holding a grip on Logan. “Human forces, building a weapon that could bring about the end of our kind. What I want… I want your help.”
“Why would we trust you?” You asked.
“You wouldn’t.”
Slowly, Magneto released Logan, causing Logan to pull you back behind him. It’s then you noticed that everyone in the airport had stopped moving. Logan tensed as he held onto you and stepped through the scanner. Your brows furrowed as you noticed the look on his face.
“What is it?” you whispered.
“A wheelchair,” he breathed out.
You followed his line of sight to see Charles weaving through the crowd of frozen people. You couldn’t believe your eyes. Charles stopped his wheelchair a few feet away from you and Logan, with Magneto remaining behind you.
“Hello, Y/N, Logan,” Charles greeted.
“How is this possible?” Logan asked, stunned.
“As I told you a long time ago, you’re not the only one with gifts.”
~~~
The X-Men jet was an unwanted familiarity as you and Logan stepped into it. Charles had promised to explain everything as soon as you reached the mansion. Magento and Charles let the two of you have your space in the back of the jet as you flew to your old home.
“I’m sorry,” you whispered to Logan.
He was completely confused as to why you were apologizing. “What are you apologizin’ for?”
“You worked so hard to plan a vacation and now we don’t even get to experience it.”
Logan pulled you into his lap and used his hand to keep you looking at him. “It’s not your fault. I’m the one who should be apologizing. Should have taken you on a vacation long ago.”
You sighed, resting your head in the crook of his neck. “Should have known that we’d get pulled back into this eventually.”
“We can say no.”
“You know we can’t… not when Charles is back.”
Logan sighed, kissing your head. “No matter what happens, we stick together.”
“Always.”
~~~
Ororo was hugging you before you could fully step off of the jet. You quickly hugged back, tears pricking at your eyes. You had missed her so much.
“You never called,” she rasped, growing emotional.
“I’m so sorry,” you replied. “Forgive me?”
“Of course.”
When the two of you finally pulled away, Logan was swept into a hug from Ororo and Marie was on you. The hugs continued through Colossus, Bobby, and Kitty, each excited to see you and Logan.
“Hold up!” Marie exclaimed, grabbing your left hand and holding it up. “Did you two get married?!”
“Yes,” you responded.
“And none of us were invited?”
The room quieted down immediately, with everyone’s eyes on you and Logan. Sensing your emotions being to grow, Logan placed a hand around you and pulled you back into him for comfort.
“Technically, it’s not legal,” Logan responded. “But it’s real to us.”
“I’m very happy for you both,” Charles said with a smile, trying to ease the tension.
You couldn’t stop looking between Ororo and Marie, both clearly heartbroken about the lack of an invitation or an update. It had been twelve years since you had last seen or talked to any of them. You basically cut off communication as soon as you left.
“I think we need to all rest and regroup in the morning,” Charles suggested.
Magneto scoffed. “We’re wasting time,” he argued.
“Not enough to make a difference.” Charles rolled in front of you and gently took your hand. “We can talk later. Your room is cleaned and ready for you and Logan.”
“Thanks,” Logan replied, sensing that you were about to break down. “I’ll come back for our bags.”
Logan was practically carrying you as the two of you left the hangar, everyone watching. You couldn’t fully take in the idea of being back here, feeling too guilty for leaving your friends in the dust. You froze once you were inside of your room. It didn’t feel like home the way it once did and it hurt with the familiarity of it.
“Sweetheart,” Logan whispered, trying to get your attention elsewhere.
“Can you go grab the bags?” You murmured.
“Those can wait. You need–”
“Please, Logan… I just need a few minutes.”
Logan sighed. He knew that it wasn’t worth arguing with you in this state. “Okay. I’ll be quick.”
You nodded, still focused on the room. He kissed the back of your head before slipping out of the room. The last few hours seemed like a fever dream. Charles was alive. He and Magneto needed you and Logan to help with an end-of-the-world scenario. You were back at the mansion, standing in the room you once considered home. Weren’t you just going to Hawaii with Logan? Was this some nightmare that you’d wake up from? Did you really want to be here? Did you really want to help?
~~~
Logan was trying to be as quick as possible, knowing that you needed him close.
“Can we talk?” Marie stepped into Logan’s path as he was heading back to you with the bags.
“Not now,” he muttered.
“Then when? You and Y/N left and never reached out. None of us knew where you were or how to get a hold of you.”
“We needed the time to ourselves."
Marie scoffed. “Twelve years?”
“I ain’t going to apologize, kid, if that's what you're looking for. I—“
The familiar scent of your smoke hit Logan's nostrils. He was taking multiple stairs at a time before Marie could stop him. He burst through the bedroom door to see you curled up on the floor, panicking with smoke coming off your body.
“I got you, sweetheart,” he pulled you into his arms, not caring that you were burning through his clothes.
“Can’t—cool—down.” Every one of your words was a strangled breath.
“It’s okay, princess. We’ll cool you down.”
Logan lifted you up and carried you into the shower. He turned it on cold water, letting it run over the two of you.
“I’m sorry," you cried. “I’m sorry.”
Logan shushed you. “You’re okay. It’s okay.”
He held you until you returned to your normal body temperature. He quickly stripped you both of your wet clothes before drying you off, slipping one of his shirts over you, and tucking you into bed. He pulled some underwear on himself before crawling in bed behind you and tugging you to his chest.
“This is a lot,” you rasped.
“We can leave,” Logan mumbled. “We don't have to help.”
“Yes, we do… They are our family… and you heard Magneto. This could affect all mutants.”
“Yeah,” he sighed, burying his head into your neck. A few moments of silence fell between the two of you.
“I hope you know that this doesn't get you out of the Hawaii trip by any means. You’ll own me.”
He chuckled, pulling you impossibly closer. “Trust me, sweetheart, I’m already thinking of how to make it up to you.”
next chapter >
#james logan howlett x reader#logan howlett x reader#logan howlett imagine#logan x reader#logan howlett#james logan howlett#logan howlet x reader#logan howlett x y/n#logan howlett x female!reader#logan howlett x you#logan howlett x mutant reader#logan howlett x f!reader#logan howlett x fem!reader#wolverine fanfiction#the wolverine#wolverine#wolverine x reader#x men x reader#marvel fanfic#marvel fanfiction#marvel x reader
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Time for more because. Because!
first off: wanna point this out: Meme games
The fact that the minigame format like Meme is used for WOTFI instead of the using the usual non-minigame challenges, or the choose your own adventure of WOTFI 2023 despite the whole “We should really do this again sometime”
And Just... That's Puzzles' whole thing. Don't know what to make of that!
and... this
hehehe… sillies… Second, some stuff from other posts I’ve made and discussions I’ve had I wanna stick here so it’s all in one place. Colored text is new stuff if you've read the other posts already and don't want to read repeat info and musings. Alternatively if you haven’t read the post and you want to. I got links.
First from here: Puzzles and Four both struggle with empathy to some extent. Four has more practice with the aspects of empathy that can be learned (cognitive empathy) but it’s still something he usually needs to actively think about, which is something he forgets to do sometimes. Puzzles sucks at just about every form of empathy. But they both still care very deeply for the people they consider friends (see reblog above about protectiveness)
Also Four and Puzzles both put people through torment for content. Puzzles with just about everything he does, Four with stuff like “I put Mario in Danger for Views” “Mario Does Literally Anything for Views” and this
Next, this.
Mario only is friends with SMG4 as a result of not being the Mario he was before Four showed up. When Mario is briefly turned back during the Lawsuit arc, Four and Meggy make him back into the Mario they're friends with without any input from him. This sorta parallels the whole Leggy situation in a weird way. In addition, Puzzles brainwashes people to make them more entertaining and cooperative for his shows. The USB SMG4 arrived in did the same thing for Four automatically as soon as he arrived.
And!
We're talking about It's Gotta Be Perfect again. Puzzles gets a fatal error that tells him to contact the manufacturers, then we get eye imagery. Then we get the IGBP Goop.
Notably, this happens when Leggy is turned back into Meggy. In other words, when Puzzles loses his only friend and source of support. I've gone on and on about how what snapped Four out of it in IGBP is his friends and being reassured they'll always be by his side, and what that means for Puzzles. and this is just... another instance of that.
But with the Goop, there's something else. It seems to be tied to strong emotions, but the fact that it shows up when Four is worried about being left behind for not being good enough--and being reassured otherwise is what allows him to break free-- AND the fact that with Puzzles it shows up when he loses his only friend and wants her back...
And, well... This...
(Seriously what was up with the stuff that happened to Three in IGBP I feel like we don’t talk about it enough) It's... well, it's something. Puzzles would do ANYTHING anything to not lose his friend, regardless of if said friend is okay with it. I don't know if Four's quite to that point, but he's... adjacent to that, at the very least.
The desperation to be seen... and the eye imagery associated with the Goop... it’s something
...Not wanting to be left behind, wanting to hold on to the people you have... wanting to be perfect...
Well... I mean, it parallels other characters, too.
(With Niles Specifically, I can't help but think that the Goop is some kind of virus similar to Niles/Eldritch Zero. I mean, it was invoked by an adware)
On the subject of characters other than SMG3 and SMG4 that parallel Puzzles, let's talk about Clench and Tari.
Both Puzzles' TV head Clench are prosthetics in a way, and Puzzles can transport people into TV shows, while Tari can, with Clench, do the same with video games. And for what it's worth, with Western Spaghetti, they're sort of on the same... frequency? Tari being able to interface with the simulation and hijack Puzzles' signal to bring forth dancing Mario.
AND
Oh and also Puzzle has parallels with Axol as well.
I mean just...
friendless childhood to becoming obsessed with media to creating that media (still obsessive).
And.. resourcefulness?
Yeah we'll call it resourcefulness.
Puzzles Parallels Post
feel like I keep repeating things over various reblog chains and stuff and my thoughts are never all in one place so. This where I keep linking said reblog chains. One of which has an endpoint that does not involve me but sshhh.
Mr. Puzzles and SMG4 have SO much in common. Four comes pretty close to Puzzles-level bad on some occasions and they share a lot of the same insecurities
I believe part of the reason Puzzles targeted Four in the first place (because I doubt “You’re the stupidest show I’ve ever seen!” Is the only reason) is because it’s easy to exploit the insecurities of someone who has the same insecurities as you, because you know that feeling in and out. Even if for Puzzles he probably didn’t have a lot of self awareness about it. Probably something more along the lines of “Oh, this guy clearly cares the correct amount about pleasing an audience and the quality of his content! But he’s not even good at it! I can use this!”
The difference is that Four has friends. He has a support system to pull him out of it when these insecurities start to make him spiral. Puzzles does not have that and frankly seems to have given up on ever attaining it. Twice.
AND THEN THERE’S ALSO THE PARALLELS WITH SMG3
Because part of it is because SMG3 and SMG4 already parallel each other so you can’t have Puzzles parallel one without the other.
But ALSO! Very similar motivations of wanting to be seen and appreciated. With a side of pettiness and jealousy. Also this
And this was also an incredibly SMG3 adjacent moment
But also the show keeps calling attention to SMG3’s difficulty making friends. Which is also Puzzles’ whole thing.
I need them to actually go somewhere with this so bad. Because 3 and 4 might be the only people who can actually understand Puzzles. Or at least let them understand themselves better as a result of Puzzles.
I NEED the “You and I aren’t so different” moment SO BAD!!
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The Fate of Meeting Your Future Spouse – What Tarot Reveals About Your Destiny! ✨💍
Instructions: Look at the 3 images of the piles below. Choose the pile that you feel most drawn to. Trust your intuition and select the one that resonates with you the most. Once you have made your choice, scroll down to read the description for the pile you selected.
I put a lot of effort into this reading, so please show some love by leaving comments, likes, reblogs, and follow me! ❤️💬✨
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Pile 1
Card 1: The Lovers 💖 Card 2: The Wheel of Fortune 🔮 Card 3: The Empress 🌸
The Lovers card is a clear sign that fate plays an undeniable role in your relationship with your future spouse. It’s all about a deep, soul-level connection, and the universe will guide both of you toward one another. It’s not just about meeting someone—it’s about being in the right place at the right time, and recognizing that bond. Your meeting will be guided by an intense sense of attraction, as if it’s meant to be. You’ll both feel an undeniable pull to each other.
The Wheel of Fortune is the card of destiny, cycles, and the forces that are beyond our control. This card indicates that your future spouse will enter your life when the time is right. It might not be when you expect it, but the universe is working behind the scenes to make sure the meeting happens. Sometimes, life throws us unexpected twists, but these twists are often the very things that bring us to the people we’re meant to meet. When this card appears, it's saying that fate is in play, and timing will be everything.
The Empress speaks to the nurturing, growing, and beautiful aspects of love. This card represents the abundance that comes with a healthy, flourishing relationship. It shows that your bond with your future spouse will not only be fated but will also be one that nurtures both of you to become better versions of yourselves. You will help each other grow in ways you may never have expected, and together, you’ll create something abundant, filled with love, peace, and growth.
In summary, the cards are showing that the fate of meeting your future spouse is deeply rooted in love and the alignment of the universe. There’s a cosmic plan, and you will meet your spouse when the time is right. The bond will be natural and fulfilling, with both of you playing a part in nurturing and growing the relationship. 🌟💍
Pile 2
Card 1: The Star ✨ Card 2: The Hanged Man ⏳ Card 3: Justice ⚖️
The Star represents hope, guidance, and spiritual alignment. When it appears, it’s like a beacon of light, showing that the universe has a hand in the direction your love life is taking. The appearance of this card is a confirmation that you are being spiritually guided toward your future spouse. There’s something serendipitous about your connection—it’s written in the stars. You may not see it yet, but there’s a sense of divine timing at work here, and everything will fall into place when it’s meant to.
The Hanged Man is a card that asks for a shift in perspective. Sometimes, the universe works in mysterious ways, and the connection to your future spouse may not come in the exact way you expect. You might find that you meet them during a time of personal growth or spiritual awakening. It might be in a moment of pause, or when you’ve let go of old patterns that no longer serve you. This card reminds you that fate often works in subtle ways—sometimes it takes a step back to allow the universe to step forward.
Justice brings balance, fairness, and a sense of alignment with the universe. This card indicates that the relationship you share with your future spouse will be one based on equality, respect, and mutual understanding. The meeting will be part of a larger cosmic plan where things align perfectly. If there’s any imbalance in your life, fate will help guide you to a more balanced and harmonious place, especially in your relationships. The timing of the meeting will be fair, ensuring that you both meet at the right moment, where both of you are ready for each other.
In summary, this set of cards tells you that the universe has a hand in guiding you toward your future spouse, even if the meeting comes in unexpected ways. It’s all about divine timing, shifting perspectives, and finding balance in life before you come together. When you do meet, it will be a balanced and fair connection that is meant to be. 🌟💖
Pile 3
Card 1: The Fool 🌈 Card 2: The Magician 🔮 Card 3: The High Priestess 🌙
The Fool represents a new beginning and a leap of faith. It suggests that your meeting with your future spouse will feel like the start of something new, something full of potential and adventure. Fate will bring them into your life in a way that feels fresh, unexpected, and full of promise. It’s like a new chapter—one that feels right, even though it might come with a bit of uncertainty. This card shows that you’ll have to take a risk or step out of your comfort zone, but when you do, you’ll find that fate has been guiding you all along.
The Magician speaks to the power of manifestation and intention. When this card appears, it shows that you have the ability to bring your desires into reality. The universe is aligned with you, and your desires for love and connection will manifest in the right way at the right time. Your future spouse will come into your life because you’ve been putting energy into what you want in love. It’s all about aligning your thoughts, actions, and intentions to attract the right person into your life.
The High Priestess represents intuition and the hidden forces of the universe. This card tells you that while you may not have all the answers right now, there’s a deeper wisdom guiding you. You’ll know when the time is right to meet your future spouse, and your intuition will play a huge part in recognizing them when they arrive. The High Priestess is a reminder that fate is working behind the scenes, even if it’s not immediately obvious to you. Trust your inner voice—it will guide you toward the right connection when the time is right.
In summary, the cards suggest that fate will bring your future spouse into your life through an unexpected and adventurous new beginning. Trust that the universe is guiding you, and that your intentions and intuition will play a key role in making that connection happen. The meeting will feel like a destined moment, aligned with the energy of the universe. 💫💖
Love this post? Spread the positive vibes by reblogging with your favorite pile number! Remember to like, comment, and follow me for more tarot insights and spiritual guidance. By sharing this post, you'll invite positive energy from the universe into your life. Let's journey together towards enlightenment and fulfillment!
Attention! This reading is for entertainment purposes only. This tarot reading does not give a 100% guarantee that all the described situations will occur or being ultimate truth. You build your own life and destiny and only you know yourself best. Remember to reblog, like, comment, and follow for more cosmic guidance and positivity!
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#divination#psychic#tarot reading#free readings#pick a card#pick a pile#free tarot#daily tarot#tarot community#tarotblr#tarot cards#tarot#future spouse#astrology#spirituality#crystals#witchcraft#meditation#manifestation#witchblr#spiritualawakening#mysticism#numerology#occult#wicca#tarot deck#pac reading
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@wormieapple I don't want to reblog all your tags, but I do want to respond a little bit because you made some great points!
You kind of summarized it as "free will is ugly, has consequences, and is constantly in competition with the free will of others." I think that's true, but only up to the certain point of the original run of the show. I would tentatively say that I think this point has been eroding ever since season 6.
In the beginning, it was just about Sam and Dean having autonomy for their own bodies and souls and being allowed to make their own choices about who they can share those things with and/or give them away to. They spend a lot of seasons 4 and 5 finding out that a lot of their lives were "predestined" and they are left questioning how much of it was really up to them. But the story is about them fighting back against this idea, and Castiel comes in to provide this additional perspective that it's not just because they're the Winchesters and they're special, that this type of freedom should belong to anyone. At the end of season 5, they have thrown off the preselected narrative and saved the world. It did have consequences and it did hurt and not everybody survived, but the message is still that free will is a good thing and the world is better for it.
Everything from that point on has been very "free will's consequences are devastating, actually." They get so many people killed, and they have no victories that are not pyrrhic and directly leading to even worse problems. Every attempt they made to have a personality outside of their assigned role was brutally punished.
In my original post I was talking about Cas embodies this a lot, and how specifically every time he tries to grapple with or defend free will, it goes wrong. He wants so much for angels to have this, to make heaven a better place, but all it ever does is get them killed in droves. It literally never works even a little bit. Introducing free will to angels was unequivocally bad and this is never rectified or redeemed. The ending message is that angels can't handle free will and it's bad for them and for the world. But I'm also thinking about how they will never ever let Sam process his trauma meaningfully. Thinking about that scene in the apocalypse world (season 13, I think???) where they killed him and had Lucifer be the one to bring him back and hold him hostage to get to Jack. Sam is yet again helpless against Lucifer's wishes, as if nothing has changed in the last 10 years, directly contradicting what they wanted to say when they had him say "no" to Lucifer in season 11. When he wanted to use his trauma to display how resilient it had made him at the beginning of season 12, he wasn't allowed to have that either, they just drugged him and took what they wanted anyway. Sam is never allowed to be anything but a victim, EVER. All this before season 15 even happened.
Season 15 was where they should have drawn those threads back together and found a way to say, actually, you CAN escape these narrow definitions and things CAN change and your choices DO matter and the world IS a better place for having you and the way that you care in it. But they either didn't want to leave us with that message, or they fumbled the ball so badly that we're still talking about it on fandom ESPN these four years later. Like, I'm not arguing with what you were saying about season 15 being terrible and spitting in the face of the story they were trying to tell before. But my main point is that I think the warning signs were there much earlier than season 15 and they were undermining themselves well before then.
... is it just me, or was Supernatural's ultimate thesis statement on the character of Cas that angels cannot and never will be any good at independent thinking and all efforts at expressing free will shall have unexpected and terrible consequences? He thought he was digging a tunnel out and he was proud of himself but actually all he dug was his own grave. The message being that you actually cannot escape the role you are assigned no matter what?
This is the message of Cas, as a way of underscoring the arc of the actual main two characters, in which the thesis statement is that you cannot escape the trap of toxic masculinity and patriarchal hegemony, you will never deal with your trauma in a way that matters, and you will die and spend eternity caught in its endless cycle. The maze has no exit.
the son becomes the father and becomes absent. this happens to all four members of TFW 2.0 in one way or another. god is dead, long live god. long live broken promises.
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Hiya! We're at 400 followers here, and I want to thank all of you again. I honestly never thought I’d hit anything over 100, so thank you all for following and for sticking around!
It’s time for another celebration! I have no better ideas than an event like this lol so let's go! I will do my best to keep up with any requests, I promise :)
Not here for a request? That's fine! I've got some ask games below, or feel free to send in anything you'd like!
(Small disclaimer: I will be writing requests as fast as my mental health and my life allow! I promise you I see and will write everything that comes in, in no particular order, but you're also always welcome to check in on your request!)
General rules:
- please specify whether you’d like angst or fluff, i can do suggestive too but not if you're a minor so please do follow that guideline 💜
- you don’t have to be following me to participate! feel free to request something, or just join in!
- be respectful! we're all here to have a good time, let's have some fun together 😊
Ask games:
🥰 - Touches
Send in the above emoji together with a prompt from this list and a character listed below, and I'll write you a lil blurb!
❤️ - I Love You
Red heart with one of these prompts plus a character and I’ll write a lil blurb!
👌🏻 - Fic Reblog
Send me this with a link to your fic, I'll read, reblog and comment!
🌅 - Vibe Check
Pop in my inbox with a sunset emoji and I'll compliment your vibes, or you as I know you if we're moots! Off anon please for this one 😄
🆓️ - Anything!
Whether it's random questions, or you just wanna hop in for a chat, or send in a request that doesn't follow the prompt lists, or something else still, go for it!
Characters (for requests)
- Remus Lupin
- Sirius Black
- Bucky Barnes
- Loki Laufeyson
- Peter Parker
- Cary Agos
Tagging some moots:
@kimorna @the-young-and-forgotten @johnmurphyisqueer @naviation-xx
#shayna speaks#shayna's 400 celebration#i dunno how many people will participate but if you see this feel free to!!#i don't know how to tag this lmao#but also reblogs are allowed if you like!!
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i need to get this out of my head before i continue clone^2 but danny being the first batkid. Like, standard procedure stuff: his parents and sister die, danny ends up with Vlad Masters. He drags him along to stereotypical galas and stuff; Danny is not having a good time.
He ends up going to one of the Wayne Galas being hosted ever since elusive Bruce Wayne has returned to Gotham. Vlad is crowing about having this opportunity as he's been wanting to sink his claws into the company for a long while now. Danny is too busy grieving to care what he wants.
And like most Galas, once Vlad is done showing him off to the other socialites and the like, he disappears. Off to a dark corner, or to one of the many balconies; doesn't matter. There he runs into said star of the show, Bruce who is still young, has been Batman for at least a year at this point, but still getting used to all these damn people and socializing. He's stepped off to hide for a few minutes before stepping back into the shark tank.
And he runs into a kid with circles under his eyes and a dull gleam in them. Familiar, like looking into a mirror.
Danny tries to excuse himself, he hasn't stopped crying since his parents died and it's been months. He rubs his eyes and stands up, and stumbles over a half-hearted apology to Mister Wayne. Some of Vlad's etiquette lessons kicking in.
Bruce is awkward, but he softens. "That's alright, lad," he says, pulling up some of that Brucie Wayne confidence, "I was just coming out here to get some fresh air."
There's a little pressing; Bruce asks who he's here with, Danny says, voice quiet and grief-stricken, that he's with his godfather Vlad Masters. Bruce asks him if he knows where he is, and Danny tells him he does. Bruce offers to leave, Danny tells him to do whatever he wants.
It ends with Bruce staying, standing off to the side with Danny in silence. Neither of them say a word, and Danny eventually leaves first in that same silence.
Bruce looks into Vlad Masters after everything is over, his interest piqued. He finds news about him taking in Danny Fenton: he looks into Danny Fenton. He finds news articles about his parents' deaths, their occupations, everything he can get his hands on.
At the next gala, he sees Danny again. And he looks the same as ever: quiet like a ghost, just as pale, and full of grief. Bruce sits in silence with him again for nearly ten minutes before he strikes a conversation.
"Do you like to do anything?"
Nothing. Just silence.
Bruce isn't quite sure what to do: comfort is not his forte, and Danny doesn't know him. He's smart enough to know that. So he starts talking about other things; anything he can think of that Brucie Wayne might say, that also wasn't inappropriate for a kid to hear.
Danny says nothing the entire time, and is again the first to leave.
Bruce watches from a distance as he intercts with Vlad Masters; how Vlad Masters interacts with him. He doesn't like what he sees: Vlad Masters keeps a hand on Danny's shoulder like one would hold onto the collar of a dog. He parades him around like a trophy he won.
And there are moments, when someone gets too close or when someone tries to shake Danny's hand, of deep possessiveness that flints over Vlad Masters' eyes. Like a dragon guarding a horde.
He plays the act of doting godfather well: but Bruce knows a liar when he sees one. Like recognizes like.
Danny is dull-eyed and blank faced the entire time; he looks miserable.
So Bruce tries to host more parties; if only so that he can talk to Danny alone. Vlad seems all too happy to attend, toting Danny along like a ribbon, and on the dot every hour, Danny slips away to somewhere to hide. Bruce appears twenty minutes later.
"I was looking into your godfather's company," he says one night, trying to think of more things to say. Some nights all they do is sit in silence. "Some of my shareholders were thinking of partnering up--"
"Don't."
He stops. Danny hardly says a word to him, he doesn't even look at him -- he's sitting on the ground, his head in his knees. Like he's trying to hide from the world. But he's looking, blue eyes piercing up at Bruce.
Bruce tilts his head, practiced puppy-like. "Pardon?"
"Don't." Danny says, strongly. "Don't make any deals with Vlad."
It's the most words Danny's spoken to him, and there's a look in his eyes like a candle finding its spark. Something hard. Bruce presses further, "And why is that?"
The spark flutters, and flushes out. Danny blinks like he's coming out of a trance, and slumps back into himself. "Just don't."
Bruce stares at him, thoughtful, before looking away. "Alright. I won't."
And they fall back into silence.
Danny, when he leaves, turns to look at Bruce, "I mean it." He says; soft like he's telling a secret, "Don't make any deals with him. Don't be alone with him. Don't work with him."
He's scampered away before Bruce can question him further.
(He never planned on working with Vlad Masters and his company; he's done his research. He's seen the misfortune. But nothing ever leads back to him. There's no evidence of anything. But Danny knows something.)
At their next meeting, Danny starts the conversation. It's new, and it's welcomed. He says, cutting through their five minute quiet, that he likes stars. And he doesn't like that he can't see them in Gotham.
Bruce hums in interest, and Danny continues talking. It's as if floodgates had been opened, and as Bruce takes a sip of his wine, it tastes like victory.
("Tucker told me once--") ("Tucker?") ("Oh-- uh, one of my best friends. He's a tech geek. We haven't talked in a while.")
(Danny shut down in his grief -- his friends are worried, but can't reach him. When he goes back to the manor with Vlad, he fishes out his phone and sends them a message.)
(They are ecstatic to hear from him.)
It all culminates until one day, when Danny is leaving to go back inside, that Bruce speaks up. "You know," He says, leaning against the railing. "The manor has many rooms; plenty of space for a guest."
The implication there, hidden between the lines. And Danny is smart, he looks at Bruce with a sharp glean in his eyes, and he nods. "Good to know."
The next time they see each other, Danny has something in his hands. "Can you hold onto something for me?" He asks.
When Bruce agrees, Danny places a pearl into his palm. or, at least, it's something that looks like a pearl. Because it's cold to the touch; sinking into Bruce's white silk gloves with ease and shimmering like an opal. It moves a little as it settles into his hand, and the moves like its full of liquid.
Bruce has never seen anything like it before, but he does know this; it's not human. "What is it?" He asks, and Danny looks uncomfortable.
"I can't tell you that." He says, shifting on his foot like he's scared of someone seeing it. "But please be careful with it. Treat it like it's extremely fragile."
When Bruce gets home, he puts it in an empty ring box and hides the box in the cave. He tries researching into what it is. he can't find anything concrete.
Everything comes to a head one day when Danny appears at the manor's doorstep one evening, soaking wet in the rain, and bleeding from the side.
#dpxdc#dp x dc#danny fenton is not the ghost king#dpxdc crossover#dpdc#dp x dc crossover#dpxdc prompt#man i just really need more dpdc stuff where danny and bruce have a good relationship. like man i NEED it. like i need to see these two#bonding together. and not in a cracky 'oh danny is a distant friend/cousin/etc' stuff but like. active participants in each other's lives#or as active as can be in this case. i neeeeed these two getting along and caring about one another#this idea came to me like last night and hasn't left since nd it was driving me up the wall to think about both positively and negatively b#i neeeded someone to hear about this or i was gonna implode#danny is the first son#tried to just get the general gist of the idea down but i definitely thought of the idea that bruce lowkey suspects vlad for having a hand#Vlad allows Danny to sneak off because he thinks Danny is alone. if he knew Bruce was there he'd be piiisssed and would put a stop to it#Sam and Tucker are alive they just got ghosted for a bit by danny bc he was in Major Grief and didn't wanna socialize. He couldn't go to#them because he didn't wanna put them in danger via Vlad.#oh that thing he handed Bruce? Yeah that's his ghost core. I have a headcanon (that isnt always applied) that ghosts can take their cores#out of their bodies at will and painlessly and without issue. and its common practice actually to do so bc they can be a not insignificant#distance away from said core before problems start to act up. and its common for ghosts to leave their physical cores at their lairs for#safekeeping because as long as the physical core is fine: so is the ghost. they can reform if their body gets destroyed. it also acts as a#fast travel sometimes. where they can reform at their core in an instant. its not inspired in the slightest by SU but i do see the overlap#most cores are pretty small for safety sake: its harder to hit if its small. and they're pr resilient too but its better to be safe than#sorry. so yeah. danny essentially gave bruce the physical embodiment of his soul and indirectly said#'if anything happens to me at least i'll be safe with you'#danny doesn't know he's batman btw#starry rambles.#was gonna go into danny becoming a vigilante beside bruce but im sleeeepy so i'll do that in a reblog. he's gonna go by nightingale if#anyone is interested. stereotypical but to be frank it is a *good* name imo. has a good amount of syllables and consonants to it#and the bird theme. and since its part of an ancestral name it has even more backing for it being bird-y without being meta
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Reblog this post and put in the tags a small detail you love putting in your art that not many people would notice ‼️‼️
#This is not a you must reblog post btw I’m just interested#I always have the little things I add no one notices but idc because I like looking at the details myself#ALSO YOURE NOT ALLOWED TO SAY ‘NOTHING’ NO NEGATIVITY ALLOWED HERE!!! LOVE YOUR ARTTT 💔💔💔#Anyway I like making the pupils a bigger lineart size to make them stand out more it’s one of my favorite parts to draw and idk why LMFAO#art#artists on tumblr
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It was glitching out so I wanted to reblog before it fucked up again but imma keep going. Also Tommy n Marionetta are platonic cuz I like the idea of them being besties 4 like no reason lol
Art Posabule x Clay Puppington- Self love is best love. Also they're both hot to me so. Yeah. Art Posabule x Bloberta Puppington- Would it be better or worse than Clay n Bloberta? Poppit Posabule x Clay Puppington- Better..or worse? Danielle Stopframe x Mr. Cartsen- Idk they both work with kids, maybe at a teacher conference they subtly flirt to each other or something. Mr. Cartsen x Dottie Trophywife- Much like Roger, Mr. Cartsen needs a girlboss to put him in his place, and Dottie is happy to serve!! Mr. Cartsen x Kim Latchkey- Same as above. She makes his glasses steam up x3 Miss Secondopionson x Bloberta Puppington- Such a rarepair but fanart has made me be like hmm...they are kinda cute...they're both basically mothers that would literally wanna be anything else. Of course more on Bloberta's end but still, as much as I love Joe, and I don't blame him, it has to be..a handful dealing with him. Principal Fakey x Dr. Potterswheel- They are both such awful little people. Maybe they can make each other worse??? Neutral Miss Censordoll x Clay Puppington- Eh it's a little interesting but it's not my cup of tea. I get the appeal tho esp since it's kinda canon lol. Clay Puppington x Danielle Stopframe- They are so wonderfully interesting on screen together but I could never really get into shipping them in the traditional sense of rooting for them, with Danielle being obsessive & Clay never fully allowing himself to be who he is or even kiss the damn guy. and then go and kiss miss censordoll right in his face. So I'm not rooting for them and I'm not throwing tomatoes at them either, I just wanna see what makes them tick really like a lab experiment. Roger Papermouth x Bloberta Puppington- I know it would have been canon later but eh. Maybe if we got s4 and s5 my mind would be changed a little more but right now it's ok. Danielle Stopframe x Reverend Putty- I like this on paper of Danielle likely being super obsessive over Putty and that making Putty feel a weird sort of validation or appreciation. Again not my cup of tea but I think it's interesting. Stephaine Putty x Dolly Forghetty- Seen some fanart. It's cute. I'm just not rooting for them or anything. NoTPs: Florence Papermouth x Roger Papermouth- Not me cup of tea. Florence Papermouth x Reverend Putty- I definitely like this a bit more after seeing the animatic for Narcissism but...idk the scene where they fuck seemed a bit awkward/forced. Plus idk I don't like the cliche of the heavy-set character only really getting with the love interest after they lost weight. I know it's not exactly like that because Revs was thinking abt her before he knew she lost so much weight but idk it just feels...hm. Not amazeballs. Reminds me a tiny bit of the end of the end of the Dick Figures movie where Red and the "go home" girl get together and he confesses to her when she's still fat but you only see them actually together when she's thin. Idk. It feels off. It's not awful of course but yeah. Nurse Bendy x Principal Fakey & Millie Fakey x Principal Fakey, - ...yeah. Nurse Bendy x Reverend Putty- This is just more so how sad it makes me that in Narcissism they get together after he calls her smart. It makes my heart hurt that she's that undervalued that she throws herself at a guy that gives her any validation :[ not revs fault tho cuz he was probably only trying to help Reverend Putty x Dottie Trophywife- He only likes her cuz of her appearance and ik they get together in Narcissism too but idk I don't think she really likes him that much, more like just getting back at Florence more than anything.
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Rui x Reader who is really affectionate, but can't touch him because of The Curse.
A/N: I'm alive!! Rui my beautiful beautiful tragic boy. I've actually been having a lot of brainrot for this game, particularly an isekai AU that made me contemplate making RP blog (I love you guys btw. This is probably my first fandom where they're so active, I've been really well connected with this fandom somehow and it's so fun!!), so I figured I might as well be writing it down now. This is an idea I've had spinning in my head for a while, so it's VERY self-indulgent/insert, but enjoy!! AO3 link here
Rui's POV. Second-person pronoun "You" is used. Angst! But also fluff!! (825 words)
You’ve always been an affectionate little thing. It’s something Rui finds adorable about you, staying optimistic despite all that looms over you, not letting any of the ghouls he KNOWS can be more than a little much sometimes destroy your positive attitude. It’s as if you decided to be the light in a place that literally has dark in its name, and he lov admires you for that.
He can’t help but feel the bitter green of envy though, when he watches you ruffle Lyca’s hair after he whines at you for treating him like a dog.
He pointedly turns away from the look Ed gives him over your head when you relax into his chest after he leans over your shoulder.
He just laughs along at your drunken antics when you nuzzle into Haru’s hand, somehow even more touchy when your cheeks are flushed with alcohol.
He tries not to remember the flash of hurt, confusion, the first time he’d backed away from your hand when all you wanted to do was give him a pat for a job well done. He doesn’t know if it hurt more when your face morphed into regretful understanding, or when you apologised and told him you’d try not to do it again.
Rui tells himself it’s for the better when he notices you’ve been avoiding him for the past week. He’d have done the same to you anyway, if he realised his feelings were starting to fester. He tries to not let it get to him when he hears you enter the Obscuary mansion, only to quickly patter up the stairs without stopping by the bar first, as you would have done previously.
Maybe before, he would have made it a little competition to see who could mess up the other’s hair more. He’d watched you run your fingers through Lyca’s after you’d tousled it out of place, anyway. Maybe in another life, you’d gently hold his face as you showered him with kisses. He’d do the same to you anyway, if he wasn’t forced to keep his hands to himself.
If he didn’t notice you hold your hand back every time you saw his mask slip. If he didn’t see your hand stop short before pulling it back to tell him he had a bit of hair out of place.
It’s all just part of the cursed life, he tells himself. He should be getting used to it by now, he sighs as he walks down the hall over to his room.
Behind him, he hears the jingle of the bell you like to wear on your keychain. He turns at the sound of your quick steps approaching.
“Rui! Ruiruiruiii!!” You call.
“Ah, there you are! Haha, I’m not going anywhere you know~ though I guess I don’t mind being chased?” He teases as you approach.
You smile up at him brightly, “I have something to show you!” You tell him, he notices now that you have a hand behind your back.
“Hm? Aw, did you get me a gift? And here I was thinking you were hiding from me!” He regrets the words the moment they leave his mouth. Your smile falters a bit as you blink at his confession.
But before he can backtrack with a “Just kidding!” your smile lightens again, eyes filling with some sort of resolve as you pull out… a glove on a stick? in your other hand.
He doesn’t pull away when he feels the simulation of a hand on his head. He can’t, when you look into his eyes with such unmistakable fondness. The awkward, stilted movements as you try to run the imitation hand through his hair communicates how long you’ve wanted to do this, and the tears that well up in his eyes betray how much he’s needed it.
He feels the cloth soak up the tears when you move the glove down to hold his face. It feels soft under his skin, and he can’t help but laugh at the absurdity of it all.
“How long did it take you to make this?” He asks as you let him lace his fingers with your hand extension. He squeezes the plush hand, feeling the soft give before it reaches the stick inside, inspecting where the glove and stick are attached.
“Um! A week? It took a bit of experimenting to get it to stay on… And they don’t really sell gloves on campus either.”
Your eyes crinkle when you look at him, the corners of your lips pull up triumphantly when he lets go of the hand to let you pat his head again.
“You deserve at least this much,” you tell him. “I know it’s not really the same or anything, but I don’t wanna leave you out, y’know?”
“It was worth it though, if it made you happy.” You look into his eyes as you say this, and he can’t help but believe you.
Reblogs and Comments are appreciated! I love you (◍•ᴗ•◍)✧*。
#Augh. The brainrot got to me guys. Also holy shit first full fanfic on this blog?? Hooray?? I've written and reblogged others from main but#A bit of an achievement! Really only wrote this cause I can't sleep lol#Actually this can?? be viewed as platonic??? I just like fics with pining and MC (Me lmao) is doing this as a friend who cares soooooooo.#If it matters at all#my writing#Nymphaea writes#Tokyo Debunker#Tkdb#Tokyo Debunker x Reader#Tkdb x reader#Rui Mizuki#Tkdb Rui#Tokyo Debunker Rui#Rui Mizuki x Reader#Tkdb Rui Mizuki x Reader#Shoulddd I tag the others? They're only mentioned though and I don't wanna be annoying#God Rui is such an interesting guy I hope I got him right#Whatever. There is enough love in fandom for me to be allowed to make mistakes#And anon told me I can do whatever I want forever!!#Angst#Okies if you got to this part I love you!!
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this is not a ship post, but something that frustrates me a lot in fanon concerning Jason Todd that attempts to soften Jason's return to Gotham for the sake of found family domesticity or easy hurt/comfort or just sliding him into the Batfam sooner, is they all seem to fundamentally misunderstand Jason.
because there seem to be a lot of fandom popular concepts of Jason coming home much sooner and just not having his whole Under The Red Hood arc. which in theory is fine and i can see the want to simplify canon to make room for your lighthearted more fluff-leaning concepts. but in everyone without fail, the way they address the clown-shaped elephant in the room is by having some throwaway line that "oh Jason quietly kills the Joker and moves on".
when the Joker being dead or alive is not the *point*. if by some chance accident, the Joker had died prior to Jason's return, whether by ridiculous freak accident, getting whacked by a fellow villain, hell even someone actually doing so to avenge Jason, it *would not* satiate Jason's anger. because Jason's end goal in UtRH is not to simply kill the Joker: it is to make *Bruce* kill the Joker. Jason's anger is directed to the idea that to Jason, if Bruce truly loved Jason, he would've killed the Joker. that is love, for Jason. compromising your personal values for love and not letting someone go unavenged. when Jason was Robin, almost every angry or misguided thing he did was born of love. he wanted to kill/hurt Two-Face because he believed Dent killed his father. he was so angry at Felipe because an innocent woman was dead due to that man's actions. he wanted to save his mother in a situation he knew he shouldn't be in because he loved her. his anger, his violence, it is driven by love and feelings of righting wrongs. that is how he thinks wrongs *should* be righted. that is how you avenge and *love* someone.
because so long as Jason's return to Gotham doesn't end in Bruce killing the Joker (which, it never will bc Bruce is Bruce), Jason will never forgive Bruce. you cannot wave away the layers of hurt and complicated trauma by killing Joker offscreen. because Jason will still be angry that Bruce didn't avenge him. in his eyes, that means Bruce did not love him enough. he was not truly loved by Bruce the way he loved Bruce. bc Bruce was Jason's whole *world*. prior to being taken in, Dick and Tim, they had support systems. they had loved ones. they knew what stability and healthy family love looked like. Jason *didn't*. and that's not to say that Catherine Todd did not love him with her whole heart and thus he loved her, but it certainly wasn't a stable and safe support system for Jason to grow up in. Bruce was Jason's first real sense of a stable, healthy life. and so of course Jason poured everything into Bruce and loved Bruce so devoutly. Bruce was his world. like he says, if it had been Bruce, Jason would've stopped at nothing.
so his betrayal is rooted in that he was not avenged, not that Joker is alive. so long as the Joker does not die by Bruce's hands, it will never be enough for Jason. (in this era, at least.) notably, this is also why i don't think it would change a thing if Jason knew the whole "oh Bruce wanted to kill the Joker but Superman stopped him" tidbit that fanon has really latched onto as a way to pacify Jason's anger toward Bruce. Jason knowing that wouldn't change a thing, in my opinion. because Jason knows Bruce. and a tenant of Bruce's character is that he grapples with murder *every day*. the whole point is how *easy* it would be for him. he is a human weapon, trained by killers, trained to be deadly. he is the greatest strategist to exist. he knows he could kill someone and get away with it. *no* trace, no proof, nothing. and he knows he *wants* to. wants to kill the Joker, Joe Chill, anyone who's hurt him that viscerally.
but he *doesn't*. that's the point. Bruce wakes up every day with that question on his mind, and every day the answer is the same. Bruce's morality is not a decision he made in an alleyway when his parents died, it's a decision he continues to make every day and he *must* continue to make in order to remain who he is. Jason is quite familiar with the fact that Bruce grapples with this daily. i do not think it surprised nor fazed Jason to know that Bruce did *consider* killing the Joker. that he wanted to. maybe even planned to. but a consideration, a want, a plan, is just a thought. it's nothing substantial, and substance is everything to Jason. at the end of the day, Bruce didn't. he was talked down by *Clark* of all people with an excuse of diplomatic immunity, as if Jason and Bruce don't both know that Bruce could've *easily* found a way to make it look like an accident or some other loophole. because he's Batman. there's always a loophole. he always finds a way when he actually intends to. but he never actually intended to kill the Joker. so he didn't. and Jason would know that there was never an intent. it's an interesting piece of fodder to add to the nuance of Jason and Bruce, but honestly, i think it'd make Jason angrier to have that excuse thrown in his face. as if Bruce hasn't beaten Clark half a dozen times by now. it's a flimsy nonsense excuse that Jason would rip to shreds.
so while yes, i understand the wish for easy lighthearted fanfic that doesn't have to deal with the nuances of canon, i think that Jason's character will always be so deeply robbed and altered if you try to fix his thirst for vengeance with an off-page killing of Joker at Jason's hands. it was never the point. the point was that -in his own eyes- he wasn't loved enough for Bruce to make an acception. he realized that not even his *death* would come before Bruce's Mission. Jason truly believed that Bruce loved him and held him as the most important thing in the world, and now he has proof that Bruce didn't. because the Mission mattered more.
i'm not saying i have a solution to this conundrum if you're attempting to solve it for fanfic/fanon, nor am i even saying it's a bad thing it exists. i just think it becoming overwhelmingly common has led to misunderstandings surrounding Jason's motivations and feelings about this arc and it's an unsatisfying solution that only seeks to pacify Jason's rage and his trauma responses for the sake of found family-ification.
#necrotic festerings#jason todd#fandom meta#idk man this isn't too serious it's really just me noticing this becoming a dominate thing#also this post isn't a subtweet at literally anyone specifically#it's a commentary on a trend as a whole#so no one think i'm like. being shady pls.#and if you write jason killing the joker himself during this era that is okay and it's valid#i just don't want the fandom largely treating it as in character#but ooc fanfic is allowed to exist! that's valid yk!#also i once again wanna reiterate all of this is commentary on *this era*#this is a pre-flashpoint meta.#jason's realtionship to his trauma *wildly* changed in both new-52 and rebirth so yeah. he's at a point he's “moved on”#and either seeks to kill joker himself or seeks to just let go of the whole thing#depending on the arc#(but if i get into that then i get into my feelings on how jason has had no consistent characterization in the past decade. so.)#(that's a can of worms we're not opening here it will make some ppl mad and i'm not dealing with it.)#is this how i start writing serious character metas and not unhinged shippy ones. idk#i've got others in my head but#i fear the discourse#if the discourse on this post gets bad i will turn off replies and reblogs idc#this is me testing the waters. ig.#also if a single person tries to argue about tim not having a loving family i will bite you /lh#yes he did. the drakes make not have done the *best* job! i'm not arguing that.#but they loved him and he had a support system.
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