#but also just assess as things go

[anna-scribbles]

adrien in my outfit from a few days ago✨ feat. my claws out converse

bonus:

[charmac]

I do not think I'll ever get over how heavy handed the Inflates set decor was

[squwhims]

Guys, I am cooking up the most comprehensive "which joker out member are you" quiz imaginable right now. I literally entered a trance thinking of questions while I was sweeping at work tonight. This quiz is going to be so jam packed with options, you guys aren't gonna know what hit you. Just a fair warning.

[villa-kulla]

2024 in review:

January: Strong start, fun at work, creative plans, many outings with new people, successful birthday cocktail bash thrown, plans to keep the momentum going -

January 23rd: cat dies

February: depression/crippling loneliness

March: depression/crippling loneliness

April: depression/crippling loneliness

May: depression/crippling loneliness

June: depression/crippling loneliness

July: depression/crippling loneliness/therapy

August: start dating this guy with whom i have a history because that's just what people do isn't it? he loves me and is ready to settle down, so maybe this is it, maybe i should just settle and join this club of monogamy and kids that i've watched every single one of my close friends join over the past 3 years, leaving my the 7th wheel at every single social function because it's ridiculous that I'm in my early 30s and my most significant relationship was with a cat, maybe it's time to finally grow up and settle for someone, you had a very slutty bisexual 20s back when it was cute, but as long as you're still somewhat attracted to guys, might as well let the pendulum settle that way because it'll be societally easier for you in the long run, and all the while you can ignore the voice in the back of your head that this is wrongwrongwrong and you don't want this, also it's too embarrassing to have a sexuality crisis in your 30s when you've been out since your teens but whatever, and you should settle down anyways because maybe it'll give your life purpose i mean look at your past year, maybe you wouldn't have taken the death of your cat so hard, at least you'd have a built-in social circle, and everyone does say that they never felt truly alive until they have kids/partner, and while your parents never pressure you they've certainly hinted that it's weird you haven't settled down yet and you'd be happier with a family of your own, therefore obviously my life must have no other value, maybe they're right, so let's settle down with a guy whom i quite honestly find irritating now and who doesn't spark joy but it's been hard to tell because everything is irritating to me lately and nothing sparks joy, and i try so hard and stay reasonably social and have hobbies that get me out of the house and am financially stable with a challenging full-time job that's sometimes rewarding and eat well and exercise a lot and these are all Healthy™ things to do so why do i feel like dying every time i wake up and have to face getting through the day, and isn't it pitiful that the one who was always Little Miss Talented and Smart and Pretty growing up has amounted to a sad, lonely, unfulfilled girl who hasn't lived up to any of her creative potential, and people will always see her as a cat lady except even more pathetic because her cat is dead, and maybe my best years are really behind me, and i'll just be stuck forever tagging along after friends who've moved on with their lives, so better commit to this guy you find tiresome right because husband + kids = happiness, maybe those nuclear family people are onto something, maybe husbands and kids are for when the rest of your friends get husbands and kids and you start to lose them because the friendship is different no matter what anyone says, and you've always been good at forcing yourself to do what's good for you, and deep down you know this is nonsense and won't solve anything, but it can't possibly make things worse than you've felt all year, and also this Guy feels like his life is starting over with you, but you feel like your life is ending with him, and the only reason you'd stay with him is so people don't pity you, and more than anything you can't bear for people to pity you and you suspect they all secretly are pitying you simply because you're single and there must therefore be something fundamentally wrong with you, and you used to be able to dismiss thoughts like that as stupid, but then again you used to be a lot more happy, and it gets harder and harder to ignore the thought that something is wrong with you, and the only thing worse than other people's pity is self-pity and every time you stop and think about your unhappiness you cry because you don't see how you'll ever feel happy again and you know you don't deserve to feel this way, but you can't actually remember the last time you were happy, it was certainly before your cat died, and I miss him so much and could this guy just stop fucking texting me for one second, oh god it's me, hi, i'm the problem it's me -

September: depression (but busy!)

October: Meds! / break up with guy + floods of relief!

November: Don't even remember

December: Actually kind of okay!

Anyway, Happy almost New Year!

[carbonateddelusion]

I know I haven't said much about it, but legitimately, "running away" was one of the most pivotal life decisions I've ever made. Probably THE first major life decision I've made, and also the best. If you have an opportunity to go, leave. Get out of there. If you are not safe at home, emotionally, physically, whatever, and you're able to leave, do it. It's going to suck such major ass for a while because you're going to have to deal with the scars they've left on you, but I wholeheartedly, full-throatedly, with-my-chest promise you that it is going to be better. You're going to be better. If you have the privilege of being able to escape, no matter how difficult it feels, then RUN.

[gumy-shark]

girl who loves analyzing fighting styles and characters power levels vs mob psycho 100, an anime which doesn’t focus on the mechanics of its power system at all

[measureyourlifeincake]

just took an adhd assessment and... i honestly dont see how this will be sufficient for giving me a diagnosis? i just had to take two tests, one where i had to hit the space bar when hearing a high pitch after a low pitch (as opposed to after *just* hearing the high pitch), and one where a bunch of letters flashed on the screen and i had to hit the space bar when any of them except for x popped up and like... i don't see how this has anything to do with any of the issues i actually experience in my life due to my probable adhd???? like ok i guess it has something to do with focus? which is a part of the whole adhd thing but not all of it? i did take a (very brief) adhd questionnaire as one of my intake forms before seeing this psych for the first time but that wasn't part of the assessment itself but even that (which was only like. 15 questions? maybe?) seemed like it had more to do with how i experience adhd

[faggling]

I love taking care of people omggg 😍😍😍

[pinkberrypocky]

pmmm rewatch live notes: ep 7

this episode is so good for the kyoko sayaka of it all. god the fucking tree of knowledge fruit of knowledge symbolism in this ep is SO

Kyubey is such a victim blamer

When Sayaka gets upset and ask why he didn’t tell them about the soul gems he says because they never asked which shifts the blame the them

The way he makes sayaka feel the pain of being stabbed to prove his point about teh use of soul gems is SO FUCKED

Hes trying to make them thankful to him for fucking with their souls by torturing them and saying look how bad it would have been

Mother gothel core tbh

The opening is madoka core madoka pov and the ending is homura core homura pov

I said this already but the part of the opening where madokami embraces madoka  makes me literally feral

Madoka is so upset and horrified by the realities of the situation that she is unable to accept them as reality and make decisions that have any real impact (again literally me fr)

Until the end of course

Homura looks so hurt when madoka asks her why she is always so cold

Her hair shadows her eyes and she looks at her marked fingernail with disdain

When kyoko leads sayaka to the church she is a black silhouette against a yellow/orange sky

Kyoko kicks down the door to the church and crushes a beam beneath her feet

Kyoko offers sayaka an apple before trying to convince her that being selfless is not the way to go

Sayaka rejects it 

Representative of rejecting the fruit of knowledge and stubbornly keeping naivety

Kyoko’s dad is lowkey just a cult leader who was really bad at it

The way kyoko holds the puppet of her dad up in the lore drop is representative of how she held him up in his religious efforts by making her wish

Kyoko also used to think of being a magical girl as a way to save the world but now she knows better

Sayaka is blank staring at kyoko during the whole story

She cannot truly listen to kyoko bc if she did she would see that kyoko is right and where would that leave her?

Kyoko says “If you wish for hope an equal amount of despair will come” AAAAAAAA

Homura wishes to be with madoka who is the personification of hope and in fighting for that she gets life after life of despair

Kyoko says that she only thinks about herself but that’s really not true at all otherwise she wouldn't be trying to enlighten sayaka

In a way kyoko is the same as her dad, preaching to others about how they can be saved only to never be listened to 

Sayaka condemns kyoko for stealing the food and has a weird moral high ground about not eating them because of it

As if she thinks she’s better for not having to steal

She so blinded by her view of the world at this point that she can’t recognize the class difference and privilege that she acknowledged in earlier eps

Actually speaking of the duality of kyoko’s wish reflecting her character that kind of applies to all of them

Madoka wishes to create hope/eliminate despair/loneliness and in the process makes it so that she is forever alone and takes on everything for everyone else

Sayaka wishes to heal kyosuke and ends up not letting herself be with him since she no longer sees herself as human

Mami wishes to stay alive and ends up dying in ep 3

Homura wishes for madoka and ends up in a world without her

When hitomi and sayaka talk about kyosuke and hitomi admits her feelings they are the only ones in the restaurant 

All the other seats are drawn in but empty

When madoka asks to come witch hunting with sayaka sayaka says “you’re too kind”

Mirrors what homura says often

Sayaka admits that she is failing at being a warrior of justice when she wished for a moment that she hadn’t saved hitomi so that she could be with kyosuke 

The reason she has such a big breakdown is bc this isn’t just about kyosuke its about her morals that she is living for being proved wrong in an undeniable way 

So what is she even fighting for?

When sayaka is fighting a witch that night she no longer cares about getting hurt since she knows she will be fine as long as her soul gem stays in tact

We only see her silhouette in black against a white background

Reflects her black and white thinking

The witch forms branch like shapes to attack her

Being attacked/hurt by the tree of knowledge

Blood on her face forms tears as she laughs and smiles widely

She says it works to detach herself and she doesn’t feel anything anymore bc her whole world has ended bc her ideals were her everything and now she can’t even have those

[theres-whump-in-that-nebula]

I did something completely out of my comfort zone and I lived!

[yeahdefnot]

The use of symbols so far is making me wonder if maybe the fears (to the extent they exist in this universe) need stronger ties to their victims/locations, that they're more restricted in their reach. They've been mentioned in two of the three incidents so far both at the (seemingly) trigger point/event

[mythvoiced]

-. lil side-note i've recently noticed about my writing (at least here on dumblr): i like to take my time lmao. as in, not in terms of replying speed, there i'm just slow, full stop. but i think i just?? like to move things along slowly? progress through conversations, slow-burn the FUCK out of a thread. lately, i've been trying to indulge myself in that more, to focus on character (both yours and mine), so if you feel 'hmmm this reply doesn't move us real quick' MY BAD, i don't like rushing ♥

[bereft-of-frogs]

Ahhh remember in June how I was like freaking out about applying for a promotion and I was like ‘maybe I’ll work on improving my writing instead’ and then I looked around and the only writing workshop I could find where I live was at 9AM on one of the islands so I’d have to catch a ferry at like 7:30 (crucially, again, on Saturday mornings I am not getting up that early) I was like I guess I’ll apply for that promotion…

Well as you all know I got the promotion and now it turns out they’re starting a writing workshop at a cafe like 10 minutes away from my apartment. 🫠 So now the new crisis is the sudden social anxiety/imposter syndrome about whether to RSVP or not. 🙃

Always gotta be freaking out about something

[unproduciblesmackdown]

forty years later: do you think this one musical about a protagonist sorta yeehaw Musician who has to grab his guitar & run a winding path through the silent hill fog going "i'm pure of heart!" to try to save his wife imprisoned by [context: capitalism] wants what the other musical about that has

[queerstudiesnatural]

i'm also losing an alarming amount of hair, it's falling out by the handful 😬

[rush-the-stars]

Ok, but would megumi ever ask you to play as...mom figure... don't shoot me for this

putting these two together….not sure if it’s same anon….or two different ones but!!! not shooting you for this!!

so. i won’t say that he Wouldn’t have a mommy kink or want that with you……but i don’t think it’s super in his realm of kinks……i also don’t think he’d ever outright ask….i think you’d have to slowly SLOWLY and CAREFULLY and with so much love…guide him to it. probably in a d/s sort of dynamic. it would take A LOT imo to get him to trust you or get there. or in any of those more role play-y types of dynamics that involve Titles such as that.

i think i could be convinced he’s into it by an articulate case study on his character + kink + relationship/dynamic exploration you know….like i could be convinced!! but i don’t think it’s like his go-to.

i think it may take a lot of work…..but i think it’s possible…..all depends on dynamic, trust, etc!