#but also it's been two weeks and i just rly need a hand to hold
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Gripping the sink tightly and looking into the mirror and repeating to myself that martrydom is overrated and that mortification of the flesh isn't as sexy as the media makes it look.
#translation: ive been waiting for two weeks to tell my best friend I'm having surgery and that i need some support and love#but I've wanted to tell her face to face bc 1. she takes news best that way#and 2. if its on the phone or via text its way too easy for me to downplay my emotional needs#but last weekend when we were supposed to see each other#she had to cancel bc her idiot moron boyfriend didnt want people over#and then today she texted me and asked if we could hang out#bc another friend needs support and my best friend wanted to have a little get together for her#so now its like#god I'd feel like such a dick dropping this if we hang out this weekend#and completely taking attention off the friend who needs support too#but also it's been two weeks and i just rly need a hand to hold#so now i come to the horrible task of weighing my needs vs the needs of others#and once again finding myself lacking#also this post is inaccurate bc im afraid of mirrors
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Hold On
angst, fluff, smut (the whole trio)
characters (all timeskip, not rly cannon): oikawa toru x reader, kageyama tobio x reader, iwaizumi hajime (mentioned)
summary: you grew up with kageyama and oikawa (same year as kageyama). yours and oikawa’s parents both own fairly successful companies, they want to merge them and decide to arrange for you and oikawa to get married to solidify the merge in the public eye. but you’re still in love with kageyama, your best friend, and hold a certain disdain towards oikawa…the wedding is a week away and a surprise appearance could change everything, or will it?
overall cw: nsfw in later chapters (it will be identified and can totally be skipped over, will not be entirely necessary to understanding the plot), cheating (kinda— if you see being ‘engaged’ for an arranged marriage as a relationship), some kinda harsh words on oikawa’s part (not really a warning, more of a head’s up), general emotional distress, mentions of attempted suicide
a/n: hey guys! i personally hate when there are two love interests in a story and you never know what would have happened with one of them… so i will be providing two endings, one for kageyama and one for oikawa so everyone can have closure with either preference lol. also, no, i don’t know why i made the end of the summary sound so dramatic 😭 not entirely sure how many parts this will be yet… we shall see. Hope y’all like part one!
Having just graduated college one year prior, your parents along with Oikawa's, were looking to merge their companies, deciding unilaterally that the best way to solidify it would be to have their children get married. The only problem was that the two of you had hated each other since high school when Oikawa made it his mission to make your life a living hell. You and Oikawa sit across from each other at the coffee shop. Neither of you have said a word in the past 30 minutes.
“It’s raining,” Oikawa spoke softly.
“Yeah,” you mutter back.
Oikawa continued staring out of the window before looking back at you. Silence fills the air between the two of you again.
"..So. Our wedding is next week…" Oikawa spoke up as he looked at you.
“Next week,” you repeat, staring out the window.
He hummed in response, leaning back and crossing his arms. He stayed quiet for another few minutes till he spoke up again.
"Isn't it crazy how we're already getting married and we haven't seen each other in four years?"
“Yeah, crazy.”
He let out a forced laugh for a moment before going quiet again. He shifted in his seat, the silence burying its uncomfortableness in his mind.
"..How's your knee been doing?"
“Fine,” you reply curtly, hoping he’ll drop it.
"Don't lie. I know your knee still isn't able to handle much physical stress after…"
“After you pushed me?” you clench your jaw.
"I didn’t think you’d fall that hard,” he mutters, “Your knee still can't take much physical stress, y/n. You really should be more careful with it."
You scoff and grit your teeth in frustration. He continued to stare at you with a disapproving look on his face.
"..I just want you to be careful with your knee, y/n. You've always been too stubborn and ignorant about it."
“God that is fucking rich coming from you.”
Annoyance spread across his face, eyes squinting at you judgmentally. A look you were all too used to.
"I swear to god, if I see you overworking your knee again I'll chain your leg to a chair."
“I'm not overworking shit.”
"That's a lie and you know it, y/n. I know you've been running laps."
“What? Are you stalking me now?”
"I'm not stalking you. I saw you when I was hanging out with Iwa-chan."
“I need to run Toru,” you mutter.
"You don't need to run. You need to give it a break, you idiot!"
“No I do,” you clench your jaw, “and you certainly don’t get to tell me what to do when it was your fault.”
He slams his hands on the table.
“Can you not cause a scene?” You roll your eyes.
He leaned back with a frustrated sigh. He grumbled quietly under his breath. You continue looking out the window in silence thinking about middle and high school when you used to run with your old best friend, Kageyama. It’s one of the few things you have left that you can do that makes it feel like he’s still around. The routine is a small comfort, but a comfort nonetheless and certainly a necessary one. Oikawa watches you go quiet and look out the window. He could practically see the thoughts rushing through your head.
“I need to go,” you mutter, standing up.
He panicked a bit as he watched you get up. He quickly grabbed your wrist to stop you.
"Wait, where are you going?!"
“I can't be around you right now.”
His grip on your wrist tightened. He had a worried look on his face.
"What do you mean you can't 'be around me' right now? Where are you going?"
“Somewhere personal, don't worry I won't run there,” you practically spit the words at him.
He flinched at the venom in your words.
"Y/n, just tell me where you're going. Please?" he spoke pleadingly.
“It has nothing to do with you so drop it.”
He clenched his jaw. He was getting frustrated again.
"I'm not going to just 'drop it'. You might be going off to somewhere dangerous. I'm worried about you!"
“That’s new,” you scoff, “I’m just going to the park... there's a hidden cove through some trees where I…” you pause contemplating saying that you went there with Kageyama but decide against it, “spent a lot of time in high school. Can you let me go now please?” You tug your arm away from his grasp.
“Just...promise me you won't do anything dangerous. It's not safe to go to isolated places like that on your own, y'know?"
“Yeah, whatever Toru.” You walk out of the café.
He was about to protest, to stop you from leaving, but he didn't. He just watched you walk towards the exit with a conflicted expression on his face. He was worried about you, but he didn't know what to do. The last thing he wanted was for you to push him away again.
"Hey, wait-"
He let out a sigh. He was too slow. You were already gone.
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i would do anything for you to love me like i'm an american hero
(Chap 1)
yeah yeah yeah this is a rainbow kitten surprise song title i can't help myself- i did draw quite a bit of inspo from this song anyhooooozzllessss i put this on ao3 but i figure since i be writing stuff here too i'll post it here.
summary: You hold your hand out and introduce yourself. “Figured I should at least give you my name since I make it a point to bother you every time I see you here.” He takes it, grip warm, firm. “I’m Leon Kennedy.” Gives you a crooked grin. “And you’re not a bother.” Oh? You weren’t, huh? ---- You're pathetic and in love with your best friend. How do you love a ghost?
word count: 3,127
rating: this chapter is g rated buuuttt there is eventual smut so i cannot recommend minors reading this fic- also pls brace yourselves for a lotta angst i'm rly gonna PUT THEM THROUGH A BLENDER (insert me rubbing my hands together like some kinda Machiavellian freak)
The first time you meet Leon it’s in a cafe. He’d bumped into you in line. Leon muttered a sheepish apology and you thought it had been downright adorable.
You’d flirted shamelessly with him- how could you not? With looks like that, the near innocent way he had said sorry. He’d just stood there, a bit awkward, and you’d thought- god what a cutie.
After that you had started to see him a lot more frequently at that cafe and, well, you hadn’t been a regular. But you became one since that first interaction.
It’s not for another month that you get the courage to do more than make flirtatious comments- though he’s always a good sport about those.
“Anyone ever told you you’re kind of an awkward guy?” You ask him, sipping on your hot latte. Eyeing him. He startles, turning a very blue gaze your way.
“Ah, yeah.” He laughs, a dry thing, and rubs the back of his neck. “Might have been once or twice.” Oh could he get any more sweet? He reminds you of a puppy.
You hold your hand out and introduce yourself. “Figured I should at least give you my name since I make it a point to bother you every time I see you here.”
He takes it, grip warm, firm. “I’m Leon Kennedy.” Gives you a crooked grin. “And you’re not a bother.” Oh? You weren’t, huh?
The two of you are standing in the lobby, someone shuffling past you to get to the line. Right. You’re in the way.
You turn back to Leon, grinning. “Do you want to come sit with me? Save me from boring reports?” You watch a flush settle along the back of his neck, crawling up to turn the tips of his ears red. You’re so in trouble.
Leon returns your grin with teeth that are slightly crooked. Furthering your deep descent into your crush.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
If you paced any more you’d likely wear a tread into the carpet.
It had been months, you think, since you heard from Leon. More since you last saw him.You knew he had an unorthodox job. Something dangerous. Leon always returned a little more banged than when he left.
You didn’t expect Leon, who was more or less a sweet, bashful guy, to have a job like that. But he always, always managed to make contact when he was gone. Whatever had happened you just hoped, wished, prayed to what deity would listen that he was okay. That he wasn’t dead. That he’d come back, even if he was banged up.
You force yourself to quit your relentless back and forth. Tea. You wanted- needed some tea. That honey chamomile you’d gotten last week at the store. You had some clover honey pops to go with it, if you could find them. You tap your fingers impatiently on the stove handle, waiting for the kettle to boil. When it does, you ignore the shakiness of your hands as you pour it over two bags. You like your tea strong.
Walking over to your couch, collapse. Curse loudly when you slosh some of that hot tea fresh off the stove on your fingers. You stick your pointer and middle finger in your mouth, wincing at the stinging pain. Gotta turn something on the TV, distract yourself. You settle on The Great British Bake Off. Stupid stuff, but you liked the friendly competition. And you got to see some pretty neat creations.
You settle into the couch, worn and comfy from years of use, like most of the things in your home. What can you say, you liked homey, comfy things. You draw the fuzzy blanket draped over the couch to you. Wrap yourself up. Sip your tea. And watch Paul Hollywood stare with his weird blue eyes.
It’s actually doing a great job of taking your mind off of Leon. British accents and pastries have that effect, you think. The heat kicks on and you take your sweater off, leaving you in your thin camisole. Too hot for blankets, sweaters, and the heat on. You pillow your head on the arm of the couch.
You don’t know what wakes you. But the hairs on the back of your neck prickle and you have this awful feeling of being watched. Your living room was dark, your TV having gone into that energy saving mode it does when it’s on too long. You stay very still, heart pounding. There’s a creak and you know someone is there.
Could be one of two things because honestly, the only person that could access your home was Leon. Or, conversely, a burglar. Murderer. Whatever.
“Leon?” That seems the most obvious choice. You slowly sit up, rubbing gritty sleep from your eyes.
“Yeah.” Comes his husky reply.
“Christ. What time is it?”
“Just after one in the morning.” Soft light floods the room; he’s turned on one of your floor lamps. You shove a hand through your hair. You slept all of four hours probably. Your mouth is fuzzy and you run your tongue over them. Tastes nasty, too. You must’ve fallen asleep with your mouth open. You hate doing that.
He comes over, to sit by you on the couch and god he does not look good. He’s got a cut over the bridge of his nose, deep purple coloring under his eyes and his straight brows are hung low, scrunching over his nose.
“So” you start. Stop. Take a drink of cold tea to wet your throat. This was awkward. Your locks had been changed. Did he pick them?
He isn’t looking at you, rather he’s looking at the floor. His hands hang loosely between his knees, elbows planted on his thighs. Leon looks exhausted. You had meant to rage at him a little when you saw him next. But you couldn’t bring yourself to do that right now. Not when he looks like this.
“Long trip?” You settle on. Leaning back under your blanket, cradling that cold cup of tea in your hands. Just for something to do.
“Something like that”, he grunts. Opens his mouth, then closes it again. He shakes his head and for a wild moment you’re reminded of a dog shaking its floppy ears. You say nothing, turn your attention back to your tea. It’s tense. You rub your finger along the rim of the cup.
“I suppose I owe you an apology.” Leon’s squinting at you now. He looks unsure, like maybe you have the answers. You shrug instead. Your shoulders get stuck up by your ears though, hunching. You force them down.
“If you want.” Out of the corner of your eye you see Leon’s eyes slide over to you. He doesn’t seem familiar to you right now. There’s no boyish light in his eyes, no silly puppy look to his features. He moves with a deliberate slowness, nothing like the eagerness you’re used to. Something’s happened, you know it has.
You clear your throat.
“If you want me to leave, I can go.” Startled you look at him. “No. No, I was just… thinking about if you’d picked my lock.” It was only half of a lie, anyway.
Leon snorts. “Should consider locking the deadbolt. It’s there for a reason.” Ah, right. The deadbolt. You never use. You guess locks on a door handle are probably much easier to get through than a deadbolt.
“Look, I know it’s been awhile.” Leon says, shoving his elbows off his thighs and letting out a long breath. You fidget with your cup some more. “It has.”
You really have no right to feel this way. The two of you are… Best friends. Close, but not close in the ways to warrant this irrational anger you have. You feel almost abandoned. You cringe inwardly at the feeling. Abandoned. Yeah, what are you, some rescue animal dropped off at the shelter?
Out of the corner of your eye, you see Leon’s jaw clench, the muscle fluttering under sallow skin.
You shift under your blanket, eyes bleary, focusing on some faraway point in the living room that you can't really see. You grumble about needing to find your glasses. A few seconds later, Leon hands them to you. You take them, careful to not brush his fingers. You don’t look at him when you quietly murmur your thanks. You wish that he would say something, or you would just open your mouth and say what you feel. Something to relieve the tension in the room.
“I’m surprised to see you. For a while there I wasn’t sure…” You trail off. You don’t want to finish the sentence.
He cracks a smile. It looks worn at the edges, a little unsure. “I wasn’t… I didn’t know if I’d be welcome.” Your shoulders hunch again at that. He probably wouldn’t have been welcome had you known he was going to come here, if you were honest. Ah, have you mentioned you hate this? Things haven’t been weird and tense between the two of you since, well, ever.
“Aw, don’t be like that. You know you’re always welcome here.”
“Am I?”
You pick at the blanket. “Of course.” You blow a breath out, blow it up and it stirs the hair off your forehead.
You grab the TV remote, turn it on.
“I was watching The Great British Bake Off.” You say when he doesn’t reply. The two of you sit for awhile. The TV lights flickering over your faces. You don’t know about Leon, but you’re not really watching. Not really, no. You were sneaking glances at him, taking his still stiff posture. How his hands haven’t moved from his thighs. He looks poised to run, you think.
The episode ends. Starts a new one. You think maybe the not talking happening between the two of you is going to drive you crazy. But you don’t open your mouth. Don’t try to pick at this weird shell he’s created, retreated into. You probably should. He’s your best friend. You should want to try to be there for him.
You’re scared. This new version of Leon feels like he doesn’t want to be here. With you. The old Leon would be excitedly telling you about blowing shit up and shyly asking if you wanted to get coffee at that cafe. As if you’d say no, despite the many times the two of you have kept up the tradition. Now he seems to not know what to do with you. How to be here.
You rub your nose. Pull your knees up. Tuck your hair behind your ears. You know you’re fidgeting. You can’t help it. You’ve never felt this- this weird next to him. Okay, maybe weird isn’t the right word. You certainly feel strange around him, you’re not a fool, you know why. But this is a new strangeness. It’s born of an insecurity that you never thought you’d have.
“You don’t… have to stay. You know? I won’t be mad if you have, like, other places you wanna be.” You wonder if that comes out as needy as you feel. Leon turns his gaze to you, something complicated flicking through his eyes. Quick enough that you don’t quite catch it, not quick enough that you don’t notice it and wonder.
“No, no. Sorry. I’m tired.” Leon’s tone gives nothing away. But it sounds like an excuse to your ears. Does he… pity you? Feel obligated to you? To stay? You try to grin at him, like you always do, like you used to. “Sure. Sure, yeah, I imagine. Um, the guest bed is always made up. You know, just in case.” And it had been. It stayed made up since the last time you had left. Leon huffs out a near silent laugh. “Is it?”
“Yeah. You kinda made a habit of crashing here, you know. So I just… kept it. I mean, I wash the sheets and stuff.” You hurry to explain that last part. You’d taken to keeping extras of things around the house for him. Toothbrush, towel, shirts and boxers and socks. It was all very domestic, blah blah blah. Your heart clenches.
Leon shifts in his spot. Toes off his boots. You wrinkle your nose.
“Walking around in my house with your nasty boots, huh” you chide him, teasing. You get a flash of a genuine smile at that. Your heart unclenches. Just a little.
“Sorry” he says. He doesn’t sound very sorry. In fact, you’d say he sounds a little mischievous. Leon holds his boots out to you. “Wanna see how nasty they are?” You squeal, smack at them. “You’re gross, Kennedy.”
He laughs, sets them by the couch. “You’re fond of telling me.”
You raise a brow at him. "Do you have to put them there? You could, I don't know, stick them. On the shoe rack. That is literally right by my door." Leon shrugs.
“Easier to just take them off here.” He teases. But he gets up, sets the boots on the rack. Holds out his hands in a placating gesture. “See? I put them away like a good boy.” You cover your mouth with your hand, trying to stifle laughter.
“You wouldn’t know how to be a good boy if it came up and slapped you in the face.” You poke at him. “You’re a menace.”
Leon levels you with a kind of look that has your giggles freezing in your throat. Just shy of indecipherable, poorly hidden heat. You hadn’t really thought about the words when they came out, just enjoying the banter with him. You quickly look away. No way were you taking any time to pick apart that look. Adjust your mental position, firmly sticking yourself in the “Leon’s closest friend” category.
“It’s getting a bite late for me,” you say, fighting to keep your voice from wavering. “I think I’m going to actually go to bed.” You think you see a flash of disappointment cross his pretty features. But he stands with you, stretching. T-shirt riding up, just enough for you to catch a glimpse of pale skin, toned. Light scars littered amongst moles.
You turn your head away, give Leon a light pat on the shoulder. “See you in the morning? Let’s go to our cafe.”
“Sure, been awhile. D’you think they remember me?”
“Hard to forget, don’t’cha think?”
Leon laughs at that. Does that thing where he awkwardly shakes his head, hair falling over his eyes. He needs a haircut, you think. It’s gotten over-long. Makes you think of a little emo boy.
“I’ll wake you when I’m up.” He was saying, jerking you out of your musings.
“No later than 8am, mister.” You warn him. Well aware that Leon was an early riser, no matter how little he slept. Leon puts a warm hand on the top of your head. “I promise, I will not wake you before 8am.” He says with mock solemnity. You suck your teeth in response, moving to knock his hand off your head. Retreat a few steps towards your room.
“Good. See that you don’t. Goodnight, Kennedy.” You call, escaping to your room. Try to calm your racing heart. Leon didn’t often initiate physical contact with you, and that was fine, really you preferred it that way. Because when he does, your brain fizzles out. Nervous system goes haywire.
You climb into bed, thoughts shifting to Leon’s earlier behavior. How tense things had been. It was the first time you felt that uncomfortable with him. The two of you were normally much more cohesive. You had a sneaking suspicion that whatever he’d come back from was different. Different from what he usually dealt with. Though, you know you likely won’t get to know. You generally weren’t privy to specifics with him.
You flip to your side, restless. Drag the covers your head, clutching a pillow close to your chest. And what was that ridiculous reaction earlier? Leon had looked… Hot? Sexy? Wanting? Your traitorous brain supplies. Surely not, not because of someone like you. Sure you flirted with him, had built a silly friendship with that flirtation as the foundation, but it didn’t mean anything. You’re, well, you. And Leon’s Leon. He was… magnetic, a little stupid, a little cheesy, but you’d been drawn to that. And he was pretty- really, you hadn’t seen a man so beautiful. All high cheekbones, full lips, delicate brows. And you weren’t convinced he didn’t use mascara or eyeliner, or something with lashes like those.
It hurt sometimes, looking at him.
You weren’t typically an insecure person. You’d even say that, sometimes, you might even be a bit big for your britches. But your friendship (you refuse to call it a relationship) with Leon left you feeling a little inadequate at times. That feeling had crawled into your sternum, made a little nest among your heart and viscera the first time he’d come back from a trip. You wished you could grab it, like it was one of those prickly things that attached themselves to your socks, and pluck it out. But it was there to stay.
You jerk the covers off your head, the space having gotten hot, humid and somewhat hard to breathe. You roll onto your back, dragging the pillow with you. You wonder what Leon was doing. Was he tossing and turning? Punching his pillow softer, to fit his head? Or had he just conked out, exhausted. Sometimes, when he stayed over, he’d get nightmares. And you’d find his silhouette in your doorway, shyly asking if he could sit with you for a bit. First time he did it you thought you might shit your pants. You had scolded him, told him to make a little noise. That waking up to him just hanging in the doorway like some kinda freaky serial killer was just terrifying. Since then, Leon had always made sure to purposely creak your creaky floorboards, to swing the door open noisily.
Not tonight, though. It was quiet. The overhead fan was the only sound you could hear. It was too quiet, one of those nights that made you wish you had a TV in your room, so you could stick something on. The silence just made your thoughts louder, screaming, ringing in your head. Knowing Leon was just in the other room, yards away, doing whatever it is he does at night, knotted your stomach. Quickened your breath. Made that thing in your chest ache.
You forcefully wrangle your melancholy thoughts into submission. It was far too late for any more of it, and you needed some semblance of sleep. You just know Leon’s going to wake you precisely at 8am, just to be difficult.
#resident evil fanfic#leon kennedy x reader#leon x reader#resident evil angst#mutual pining#friends to lovers#slow burn#angst with a happy ending#star's writing
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falling in love with hanta sero
word count: 1.6k
warnings: not rly anything bad, college stuff, talking about growing up, sero being a cute boyfriend, not proofread. mdni.
notes: this was wayyy longer than i intended, it gets pretty mushy in some parts. much love and let me know what u think!
masterlist
you first meet hanta sero in the back of your humanities class – a class he failed the previous year, by the way.
he’s a year older than you, being forced to retake all the classes he flunked so he can finally graduate in the spring. you find him quite funny, with his peculiar laugh and weird jokes, and he takes a liking to you, too. it only takes you a week to get ahold of his number and attend a frat party with him the following weekend.
hanta will introduce you to all his friends, and you become a regular in their group “study sessions”; which always end up in everyone watching a movie and falling asleep in sero’s dorm. you and him always end up being the last ones awake, sharing philosophical conversations and laughing until the sun rises. it’s totally platonic when you fall asleep in his arms, the both of you exhausted from the week’s worth of schoolwork.
during winter break, hanta is a mess because you aren’t there to complete the group anymore, since you’re staying at home for the holidays. he sulks around all day, missing your intelligent conversations and pretty face. denki and kirishima try their best to cheer him up, but things just “aren’t the same” without you.
your absence for the few weeks is what makes hanta realize he really likes you.
upon your return, sero is the first one to envelop you in his arms in the group hug. once everyone else lets go, his embrace lasts for a second longer, because he just missed you so much. and now, he’s acting a little bit strange around you; he stiffens every time you playfully swat his arm, and silent when you come out to show the group all the new clothes you bought from the mall back home.
“what do you think, sero?” you ask, as he seems to be in some sort of daze, mind wondering from the discussion about the new dress you bought.
“um,” sero hesitates, “yeah- it’s…it’s really nice,” he tells you, unable to quit his staring at your frame. you think he’s beginning to not like you anymore. but oh, how wrong you are.
you’re on his mind non-stop, every second of the day. his new attitude isn’t because he dislikes you, no, it’s because he’s so genuinely in love with you and has no idea how to deal with it. he’s had crushes before, sure, but these are grown-man feelings, so intense and pure, something he’s no longer able to cover up with a laugh and smile.
it only takes sero two weeks after your return to confess to you on a pizza run late at night. you’re in his passenger seat, boxes of pizza warm against your lap, it’s the first time since you came back to college that he’s been alone with you. he’s even driving weird, back completely straightened as he grips the wheel with white knuckles. you ask him if he’s okay about 4 times before he finally snaps.
“i just…i really, really like you, okay? i mean- you’re so pretty, and smart, and-,” he blurts while mentally facepalming himself.
“hanta,” you giggle, interrupting his confession, “i like you, too. you need to chill out, i’ve had a crush on you since we first met.” you seem so nonchalant about the whole situation, but one of you has to be, because sero feels like he might explode at any second.
you can see his body language immediately relax as you reassure him you also had the same feelings. at the red light, he slumps against his seat, the thousand-pound weight finally lifted off his shoulders. you ask him on a date on the ride home, and end up holding hands the entire way back, preparing one another for the teasing you’re both about to receive from your remaining friends.
when the night of your first date rolls around, he’s 20 minutes early, pacing outside of your dorm room with a bouquet of flowers in hand. he’s so nervous, tripping over his feet as he strides from wall to wall, a clumsy mess of emotions. sero almost knocks on your door four times, the fifth time being the charm when he nervously hammers the door harder than necessary. and when you open the door and give him that million-dollar smile, his wobbly knees almost collapse under him as he hands you the bundle of flowers with a jittery hand. sero makes a point of taking you on enough dates for his nerves to settle before asking if you’ll be his girlfriend.
things between you and sero continue as before, only this time there’s more kissing among other things involved. the more time passes, you realize sero’s the one for you, with the way you effortlessly talk to him about everything and nothing at once, and the comfort that comes with just being around him. at all the parties and social events you attend, he’s literally making other girls talk to the hand, and you know you’re the only one for him.
once graduation comes around, he makes sure to put your name in his parting words, a sweet quote he probably found online, as you watch from the front row, supporting your man with everything in you. he’s got the proudest smile on his face after earning his degree, feeling so lucky he’s had you there to support him the last year. sero makes the photo taken of him dressed his graduate cap and gown and you, his screensaver. it’s the proudest moment of his life so far.
you’re more than upset on move-out day, crying many times as you move all of sero’s belongings out of his dorm room. all the memories shared in that room are tremendously significant to your relationship.
“it’s okay, baby,” sero says, catching your tears in his chest for the third time that day, “i’m only going to be a couple minutes outside campus, you can come and visit whenever you want,” he comforts you, assuring he will never be too far away. as soon as all the boxes are moved into his new apartment, sero gives you the spare key. you end up spending your summer vacation at sero’s apartment, and he invites your family to come stay whenever you miss them.
when fall semester makes its way back around, you’re left alone on campus, filling up the space of sero’s old dorm room with your own things. it’s an odd feeling not having his taste in the room, the spaces that were filled with laughter and late nights are now empty, only taken up by the photos of you, sero, and all the amazing friends he introduced you to.
you often find yourself coming to sero’s apartment before he gets home from his new, adult job, finishing your homework or cooking a meal for him. at times, you can’t stand sero’s old – your dorm, as it is no longer touched by him. but all that sadness quickly fades when sero walks through his apartment door, greeting you like he hasn’t seen you in forever. the change in your last year of college is uncomfortable, but necessary for you to transition into your adult life along with sero. your once puppy-love relationship blossomed and matured into a beautiful, strong connection as the both of you grow older.
for winter break, you and sero spend it travelling to visit both of your families, making sure an adequate amount of time is spent enjoying yourselves with family members. your family members adore sero, with the way he dotes on you and helps out in the kitchen after dinner, a noticeable difference in his old immature self. he’s growing up to be an amazing man, and you feel so fortunate to have helped him do so, and to be the one by his side the entire time.
falling in love with someone will always change you.
time seems to fly up to the point of your last semester. after your break, you return back to your dorm, hoping time will speed up until you have to leave. the seat next to you is taken by someone else, and you especially notice that now, not having as much time on your hands to leave campus to see sero. you mostly spend weekends with him now, when he isn’t working, but your time together is always taken up by you typing away on your laptop at the insane amount of essays due.
eventually, though, weeks pass, your last assignment is turned in, and you’re able to join sero in the next chapter of your lives.
at your graduation, you have a whole section of support, sero being front and center with your family and friends you made during your time at college. sero’s a blubbering mess when you walk across the stage, kirishima and denki on either side of him, all crying seeing the baby of their group grown up. you put sero’s name in your parting words, too, and you can’t stop yourself when tears roll down your face when you see your beloved boyfriend practically sobbing at how proud he is of you. hanta’s the first one you hug after the ceremony, you wrap your arms around his neck with your degree in toe, and his first words are to express how immensely proud of you he is. he doesn’t leave your side when you hug all the other people there for you, his words of motivation mean the most to you.
and of course, he makes sure you upstage everyone there, dropping down on one knee to propose to you in front of your entire class.
#this is so self indulgent its not even funny#hanta sero#sero hanta#sero x reader#sero hanta x reader#mha#bnha#boku no hero academia#my hero academia#mha x reader#bnha x reader#my hero academia x reader#i love hanta sero
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OH GOD BB IM ACTUALLY DESTROYED BY THIS SKDJSKSJ like i knew i would be cause every astro fic hits a million times harder just because of how rare they are BUT THIS TROPE IS SOOO PERFECT FOR EUNWOO GOD FAKE DATING I LOVE FAKE DATING SOOO MUCH
and the progression was so good too like they both rly were just trying their best to make it believable until they both started catching feelings after they were forced to put on the act 24/7 for 2 weeks during the vacation GOD I ATE UP EVERYTHING
the astro cameos made me giggle way too much I feel like I’m so used to reading eunwoo fics when he’s so separate from them that seeing him connected to them makes me so emo :((( like a lot of fic writers only stan eunwoo as an actor or soloist or don’t write for astro as a whole and so when I see eunwoo anywhere he feels so disconnected from astro unless the other members are also there :(( AND UGH IM SO HAPPY WE ARE FRIENDS AND I HAVE AN AROHA FRIEND AND WE BOTH WRITE FICS (even tho I still need to write more astro fics) ITS JUST THE BEST YK SKDJKSS
but ugh back to the fic god I would fold so bad over rich ceo eunwoo AND ALSO LIKE HIS PERSONALITY :(( he is just a silly goofy dude!! and he can’t hide it !!!! also his jealousy over jinwoo…. I barked maybe perhaps just slightly it came out KDJSKJSKSJS I’m just a girl 🎀 BUT ALSO HIM BEING UPSET IN THE CAR BUT STILL HOLDING YNS HAND SO GENTLY AND TRACING THE RING IM SICK IM SO SICK
the drunk confession I am actually ruined crying real tears thinking abt it now idk why I just loved how their fancy act slowly started disappearing like yn crying at the party and then their shoes and tie coming off etc and then them both crying and ending up on the floor together hugging and being so happy and properly engaged LIKE NO IM ACTUALLY RUINED BY IT CAUSE ITS SO BEST FRIENDS GETTING ENGAGED AND BEING SO IN LOVE AND I JUST LOVE IT SO MUCH UGH
also like his younger brother and jinwoo, the two closest ppl to eunwoo (im guessing), noticing that the relationship was strange at first is such a nice little detail like everyone else is so easily fooled and just swept away in congratulations that they don’t even look twice at the missing pieces
the yacht scenes def my favourite like that’s just so cute to imagine :(((( and him resting his head on yn’s thigh afterwards and playing w his hair IM WAY TOO SINGLE FOR THIS AND THEY HADNT EVEN COME TO TERMS W THEIR FEELINGS THEN UGH
anyway absolutely ate and def reminds me of how much I need to finish my jinjin fic for you as well HOPEFULLY ILL GET IT DONE WE WILL SEE been in a major writing slump recently it’s not even funny but eventually once im back into the flow of writing it’ll be top of my priorities for sure 🥹🥹
⫸ you know i love you
synopsis. when your best friend needs to show his parents that he's settled down enough for them to offer him a job in their company, he asks for your help- in the form of a fake engagement.
pairing. nonidol!/ceo's son!cha eunwoo x reader
genre. ceo's son au, childhood friends to lovers, fake relationship
wc. 10k!! (longest fic i've ever published, bear with me.)
warnings. some mild sexual references, some hurt lots of comfort, dongmin is silly, is jinwoo a wingman or a shit starter? we'll never know
a/n. this idea popped into my mind and i just loved it so much, i had to write it. happy holidays, ya'll!
January 15th
“There is no way in hell you’re actually that stupid.”
“I’m not stupid! You’re just not hearing me out!” Dongmin called out from the small couch in the living room of your sixth-floor studio apartment as you leaned against the counter in the kitchen, waiting for the water for your tea to boil.
You and Dongmin have been friends for over twenty years now. His father was the CEO of a huge company, his mother was the CFO of the same company, and your mother was their housekeeper. She was also basically Dongmin’s nanny, tutor, and personal chef. Starting from the age of six years old, your mother worked out a deal with Dongmin’s parents so that every day after school, their personal driver would pick Dongmin up from his fancy private school, then drive to your significantly less fancy public school, and then drive the two of you back to Dongmin’s house, where the two of you would hang out and do your homework while your mother took care of things around the house until Dongmin’s parents came home.
This routine lasted until the two of you graduated high school. Over the years, the two of you had become close as could be, even hanging out on the weekends. There was never room for any doubt in your friendship; even though Dongmin had gone to Oxford University in the UK, which was arguably the most extra school he’d gotten accepted into (you had begged him to go to Columbia University so you could visit New York), you stayed home and worked in your father’s little corner store. But even so, Dongmin traveled home for every long weekend, every holiday, and every vacation he had. And he spent all the time he was home with you.
You’d done a lot of dumb things to get each other out of a lot of sticky situations in the past, but what he was suggesting now was a new low.
“Well, I don’t really think getting married is the best course of action.” You mused as you poured the hot water into the two waiting mismatched coffee mugs.
“You’re not listening!” Dongmin exclaimed as he hopped over the back of the couch and strolled into the kitchen, leaning on the counter as he watched you steep the tea.
“Then explain to me how this is a good idea.”
“Because. I’m pushing thirty now-”
“You’re twenty seven.”
“Pushing thirty. And my folks want to retire soon, and my dad wants me to take his place, which is like, what I’ve been shooting for since I was a kid. But my mom is pushing back because she thinks I’m not mature enough. She says that she won’t even think about letting me join the company until I’ve shown that I’ve settled down.”
“You go to the club literally every weekend. I think I might be on your mom’s side on this one.” You handed Dongmin his mug of tea and strolled into the living room, settling down on the couch, and picking up the remote to browse for a movie to watch.
“Yeah, but if I stop going to the club for a while and make it look like I'm in a serious relationship, then my mom will see how mature I’ve gotten, and let me join the company!” Dongmin gleefully relayed his plan to you as he stole the blanket from your lap and wrapped it around himself, curling into the other corner of the couch.
“And you think that us getting married is your best bet?”
“Not married! Fake engaged. There’s a difference.”
“Let me reiterate; you really think getting fake engaged to me is the best idea?”
Dongmin turned to you, confusion written all over his face, “yeah? You’re like, my best friend.”
“Well, duh. I just think your mom would prefer it if you got engaged to like, another rich girl.”
Dongmin rolled his eyes and snatched the remote out of your hand, scrolling for a moment before pressing play on a random nature documentary. “I think my mom would see it as a win either way. She’s been on my ass to get into a serious relationship since I started university. Which is totally unfair, by the way! Jinwoo hasn’t had a date since middle school, and he’s already on track to be the COO at his dad’s company. And Myungjun’s had like, twelve relationships in the past year and a half, and his startup is already turning a massive profit.”
“Rich people problems.” You sighed, watching as a lion on TV devoured a gazelle.
“Yeah, it is. But I never ask you for anything. I think you owe me. And I can’t keep working at Minhyuk’s parents company forever. It’s getting kind of embarrassing.”
You remembered all the times that Dongmin paid to have you flown out to England, paid for you to stay in fancy hotels, car service, room service, treated you to extravagant meals, the tens of thousands of dollars worth of birthday and Christmas presents he’d bought you over the years. And you realize, he’s right. You do owe him.
“Okay…We need a plan.”
Dongmin practically jumped out of his seat at your sudden agreement. “Are you serious?”
“Yeah.” You sighed, reaching over to grab the remote, turning the TV down. “But we’re gonna need it to be airtight if we want this to be believable.”
“You’re the smart one. Just tell me what you need me to do, and I’ll do it.”
As you looked at Dongmin’s gleeful face, you almost regretted agreeing to his scheme. Dongmin saw the crease between your brows, and reached over to poke your shoulder.
“Hey, you don’t have to do this if you don’t want to. I know it’s kind of a lot.”
You brushed him off with a shrug of your shoulder. “No, you’re right. I owe you. This is honestly the least I could do.”
“Then let’s do this.” He grinned, holding up his pinkie finger in front of you. You playfully rolled your eyes with a scoff before linking your pinkie in his.
“Let’s do it.”
January 18th
“No, that one’s not big enough.”
You sighed as Dongmin rejected yet another one of your suggestions. “I’m the one who has to wear it, why do you have such a strong opinion?”
“Because I’m the one buying it!”
You and Dongmin were currently at a swanky jewelry shop searching for the perfect engagement ring. At seven in the morning. On a Thursday. Neither of you were in a particularly good mood.
“Shouldn’t you want a smaller ring, then?” You questioned his logic, looking up at him with a cocked brow.
“Hey, only the best for my future wifey-poo.” Dongmin made a kissy face at you, causing you to audibly groan in disgust, pushing his face away. You ignored his giggles as you felt your phone buzz. You saw the most recent text was from your father, asking you to come into work early to help him open his corner store.
“Okay. Well, I have to go to work.”
“Nooooo! You can’t make me do this by myself! The dinner’s next weekend and we won’t have time to meet up again before then.” He protested, grabbing your arm and bouncing on the balls of his feet like a spoiled child- which he was.
“I would say I trust you, but I don’t. You know my ring size, I don’t want anything big, I don’t want anything gold, do not get me anything square cut, and for the love of God, please just ask the lady at the counter for help instead of just buying me the first thing you see that you don’t hate.” You patted his shoulder and made your way out the shop, waving a goodbye to him over your shoulder. You could see Dongmin’s downtrodden expression in the reflection on the glass door as you left. You just hoped he would get you something understated. You would be having to wear it every day for the foreseeable future.
You and Dongmin had spent nearly three hours the other night working out your plan.
Dongmin had invited his parents over for dinner at his swanky penthouse next Saturday night. He’d hired a fancy chef to make the dinner, and a decorator to make his apartment look not so “twenty seven year old single man-child”. After the main course and right before dessert, he would stand from his chair and announce that he had something important to say. Then, he would turn to you, get on one knee, and propose with whatever hopefully not-ugly ring he’d chosen today. To which his parents would hopefully be overjoyed and proud, and after at most a few months, they’d realize how mature he’d gotten since getting engaged, and give him the job in their company.
You weren’t sure it would work, you weren’t sure how long it would take, but you were determined to go through with it. After all the amazing opportunities and experiences that Dongmin had given you over the years, you figured that the least you could do was pretend to be his fiancee for a few months.
January 27th
Today was the day he would propose. You’ve never been this stressed in your entire life. A package had been delivered to your door with a note from Dongmin inside, “Blue has always been your color.” You had been staring at the dress in the box for the past ten minutes, trying to not think about how many thousands of dollars he’d spent on it. He was right, though. He’d taken you to Japan for spring break a few years ago and the two of you’d gotten a color palette analysis done. You’d have assumed he’d forgotten all about it, but the beautiful navy dress on your bed proved otherwise.
You looked at the time on your phone, the numbers 4:27 glared up at you, eliciting a sigh from your mouth. The weight of your actions was starting to weigh down on your shoulders. Why did you have to agree to this? It’s not like you didn’t like Dongmin’s family- they were fine! From the limited interactions you’d had with them over the years and from what Dongmin’s told you about them, they were perfectly nice people. But it was only natural for you to be a little bit intimidated by them. They were wealthy, powerful people, and you were about to get “engaged” to their son.
You got ready slowly, almost unconsciously dragging out the process as long as you could. Your phone rang right as you were slipping on the sleek black pumps Dongmin had bought for you last summer while he was vacationing in Paris.
“Yes?” You picked up the phone, looking at yourself in the mirror one last time before meeting your doom. You looked good. Hopefully good enough.
“I’m waiting in the car. Are you ready?” Dongmin’s pixelated voice rang out through the phone. You grabbed your purse, put on your coat, took a deep breath, and walked out your door.
“Yeah, I’ll be out in a minute.”
Without another word, Dongmin hung up the call. You scoffed and dumped your phone in your bag. You silently thanked whatever invisible force was on your side that day, as the elevator in your building that had been broken for the past two months had finally gotten fixed. You were not looking forward to walking down six flights of stairs in those heels.
As soon as you walked outside your building, you spotted Dongmin’s fancy black car. You couldn’t see him through the tinted windows, but you knew it was him when his driver stepped outside and walked around the car to open the back door for you. You slid into the backseat where Dongmin was playing a game on his phone. He looked up at you briefly, mumbling a “Hey”, and going back to staring at the screen.
You rolled your eyes at your iPad kid of a best friend and rested your head on the window as the car drove through the busy city streets.
Twenty minutes later, you pulled up to Dongmin’s penthouse. No matter how many times you’d been there, you would always be in awe at the massive building.
“You okay?” You turned to look at Dongmin as he spoke, meeting his eyes, seeing the concerned look on his face, you put on a smile, and lightly punched his shoulder as his driver opened the door.
“Of course. Not like I’m about to pretend to get engaged to my best friend in front of his family or anything.”
Dongmin didn’t look convinced as he took your hand in his before you had the chance to leave the car. “You know, it’s not too late to back out.”
His words didn’t do anything to quell the uncertainty in your stomach. But still, you put on a brave face and playfully rolled your eyes. “As if anyone else would be willing to get engaged to you.”
Your words seemed to sate Dongmin’s concern as he rolled his eyes in turn and shoved your arm, prompting you to step out of the car. You looked up at the tall building in front of you and took a shaky breath. It’s not like it was real. You didn’t actually have to get married to him or anything. It was all temporary.
“They’ll be here any minute. We should go up.” Dongmin’s warm breath on your ear caused you to jump, prompting him to flash you a confused look. You shook your head and followed him into the building, mentally hyping yourself up for the night that was to come.
|
“You look beautiful, darling.”
Dongmin’s parents had arrived ten minutes after you had, and you had been internally screaming the entire time since then. You were sat next to Dongmin at the table in his huge dining room with his mother sitting directly across from you.
“Ah, thank you so much. You know, Dongmin bought pretty much my entire outfit.” You replied, doing your best to keep your shaky hands still as you cut through your expensive steak. You could see Dongmin trying to hold in his laughter in the corner of your eye. Clearly seeing you in intense mental turmoil was funny to him.
“Oh, our Dongmin has always been such a thoughtful boy.”
Thoughtful. Hilarious.
“Yeah, he’s great.”
“So, dear, are you still working at your fathers shop?”
You took a sip of wine and wiped your fingers on your napkin. “Yeah, I am. But I’m planning on applying to some jobs in corporate. Even if just working in the mail room or reception.”
“Oh! Well, I’m sure we could find you a job somewhere in our company. I’m sure I know someone that could use a secretary or assistant.” Dongmin’s father spoke up, causing Dongmin to choke on his wine. You lightly patted his back as he coughed into his elbow, offering a tight-lipped smile to his confused parents.
“That’s very kind, but you really don’t have to do that.” You spoke over Dongmin’s coughing.
“We’d love to have you in our company, really. You and your parents are practically family.”
Dongmin took a deep breath as his coughing fit came to an end. “Are you guys for real?”
“Of course! Why wouldn’t we be?”
Dongmin stayed quiet for the rest of the main course, leaving you alone to continue awkwardly conversing with his parents, and ignoring every kick under the table that you gave him.
“So Dongmin, why did you set up this dinner, anyway?” Dongmin’s mother asked, leaning back in her chair as dessert was being made.
“Well…” Dongmin started. ‘Here we go’ you thought as your leg started shaking. “You know that the two of us have been friends for a long time.” He continued, taking your hand in his, looking at you with what anyone on the outside would see as fondness, but you knew from the look in his eyes that he was struggling to not burst out laughing.
“I hope this doesn’t come as a shock to you two, but we’re ready to take the next step…” Dongmin rose from his seat and pushed it to the side, immediately dropping to one knee in front of you. He softly spoke your name as he looked up at you. You could tell he was about to lose it.
You heard his mother gasp from the other side of the table as he continued, “You’ve been by my side for as long as I can remember. You’ve been my best friend, my partner in crime, and my biggest supporter. We’ve been through every step of our lives together. But I want to go through the next part of our lives…With you as my wife.”
If you didn’t know any better, you would have thought that his speech was very sweet. But you did know better. And now you were the one struggling to hold in your laughter.
Dongmin reached into his pocket and pulled out a small velvet box, “Will you marry me?” He opened the box and your jaw hit the ground. He did good. He did really good. The ring was exactly what you wanted. It was a small round cut diamond surrounded by smaller gems on a beautiful silver band.
You ecstatically nodded your head, holding out your hand for Dongmin to slip the ring onto your finger. The two of you stood up and hugged each other tightly. “I asked the lady at the counter.” He whispered in your ear. You giggled into his shoulder before his mother spoke up.
“Well, it’s about time!”
The smiles immediately dropped off of your faces.
…What?
The two of you pulled away from each other, slowly turning to look at his parents as they beamed at the two of you from across the table.
“The two of you have been attached at the hip since you were kids. It was only a matter of time.” His father agreed, holding his wife’s hand as the two of them looked up at you with an endearing gaze.
“...Huh?”
February 11th
“Oh yeah, my mom is throwing a valentine’s day party and she wants to know if you’re gonna be there.”
Dongmin was in your kitchen drying and putting away dishes as you washed them.
“Why would I be there?”
“...Because we’re engaged?”
“Oh, yeah.”
You hadn’t actually forgotten. You couldn’t now that your parents knew. As soon as your mother had shown up to work the day after the dinner, Dongmin’s mom was immediately gushing about the engagement that you had forgotten to let your mom in on. Your mom immediately called your dad to tell him about it, and then he immediately called you.
You couldn’t just tell them that it was a lie- they were just so happy about it, you didn’t have the heart to break it to them.
“I can’t just show up to my parents' valentine's party without my fiancée.” Dongmin whined as he put away your ancient cast-iron frying pan. You rolled your eyes behind his back.
“You don’t have to show up at all, actually.”
“Let’s be real for a second. There is no way that my mother will let me get out of going to one of her parties, and I really don’t want to go by myself.” Dongmin gave you his best puppy dog eyes, which caused you to physically hold yourself back from laughing in his face.
“Pleeeeease. I’ll buy you a new outfit for it. I swear to God, you’ll be the prettiest girl there. I’ll have to be constantly throwing hands to keep those gross corporate men’s hands off my gorgeous fiancée.”
“Whatever. I’ll go. You don’t have to buy me a new outfit.” You relented, drying off your hands before opening the fridge to grab a soda.
“You aren’t wearing your ring.”
You looked down at your left hand before looking back up at Dongmin, “Yeah. Our parents aren’t around, why would I?”
You didn’t see Dongmin’s pout as you flopped onto the couch, wrapping a blanket around yourself as you settled into the squishy furniture.
“Okay, but I spent a lot of money on that rock. Also, didn’t you say it put off that creepy guy who works at the coffee shop?” Dongmin hopped over the back of the couch to sit right next to you, wrapping his arm around your shoulder.
“Well, yeah. I wear it in public. But why would I wear it when I’m in the comfort of my own home?” You moved his arm from your shoulder, opting to ignore the disappointed sigh that came from your best friend.
“I’ll take you shopping for the party tomorrow. Get you a cute dress and shoes or whatever.”
“You don’t have to spend money on me, Dongmin.”
“I don’t care. I want to.”
You glanced at Dongmin to see him pouting with his hands in his lap, watching silently as you scrolled through Netflix instead of snatching the remote from your hands and picking a show like he usually would. You sighed and laid your head on his shoulder, feeling his breath stop for a second before he rested his head on top of your own.
Dongmin is your best friend. He’s helped you so much in so many ways, and you genuinely would do anything for him, and you think he’d do the same for you. Ever since you agreed to get fake engaged to him, there was a thought in the back of your mind; “What if this ruins our friendship?” You pushed it aside at first, brushing it off as a stupid anxiety-induced worry. But every day since then, the thought has only grown more and more prominent.
“I’m free after two.”
You could feel the smile in Dongmin’s cheeks and he wrapped his arm around you, holding you close as you finally settled on a movie.
God, you hoped you were wrong.
February 14th
“Keep your eyes closed!”
“They are closed.”
“You better not be peeping.”
“This may come as a shock to you, but I actually really do not want to see you naked!”
You were in Dongmin’s bedroom getting ready for his parents' valentine's day party. You’d have gotten ready at your own apartment, but Dongmin had called you over to help him decide on what to wear, so you decided to just bring your clothes with you and get ready there. Which was probably a good idea, because unlike your apartment, Dongmin’s penthouse actually had a full-length mirror and good lighting.
Dongmin had taken you shopping the day before, and despite your protesting, bought you an inordinately expensive, albeit beautiful, blush-pink dress, and a pair of white pumps. They were beautiful, and although you appreciated Dongmin being so willing to spend money on you, you hated knowing the actual number that he was spending.
“Okay, you can look now.”
You waited patiently for Dongmin’s response after he opened his eyes, but he just looked at you with a blank stare. You looked down at yourself, thinking you might have forgotten to zip a zipper, or your dress had gotten stuck somewhere.
“What?”
“No. Nothing. It looks good.” Dongmin cleared his throat and pulled his phone out of his pocket, quickly typing something before standing up and leaving the room. “You coming?” He called over his shoulder.
“...Okay…” You said under your breath, grabbing your phone from his vanity and following him out of the room. You felt Dongmin’s eyes on you as you put on your coat, looking up at him with a raised brow, he quickly turned away and busied himself with tying his shoes.
“Okay, let’s go.” Dongmin quickly hurried out the door, leaving you behind in a confused state. You shook your head before turning out the lights, setting the alarm system, and locking the door behind you.
You knew you were in for a long night.
|
“Well, aren’t you two just a beautiful couple!” Dongmin’s mother called the two of you out immediately as you walked through the doors to their impressive home. You were no stranger to the glamour and wealth of the Lee’s life, but it still threw you off to see so many beautiful, wealthy people all in one place.
“Thank you, Mrs. Lee.” She greeted you with a kiss on the cheek, and her son with a tight embrace. You looked around the room to see some vaguely familiar faces; you recognized Park Jinwoo’s parents conversing with Dongmin’s father, someone by the drinks table who you were pretty sure was named Yoon Sanha, and the three of Dongmin’s friends that you were actually on a first-name basis with, Bin, Myungjun, and Minhyuk, greeted the two of you with a wave from the other side of the room.
“Well, you two have fun! We have food, drinks, desserts, whatever you like!”
“Thanks, mom.” Dongmin took your hand and led you over to his friends, meanwhile, the sudden realization that you hadn’t seen any of these people since long before your fake engagement hit you like a ton of bricks. You could see them smirking at the two of you as you neared. Dongmin felt the shift in your demeanor and he turned to look at you, your face had paled as if all the blood had drained from your face.
“Just be chill.” He whispered to you as you neared the small group. You gave him a small nod, and quickly plastered a smile back onto your face.
“Hey guys how’s it-” Dongmin was cut off by Myungjun grabbing him by the shoulders and giving him a shake.
“I can’t believe you didn’t tell us that the two of you were even dating! And now you’re engaged!”
“Yeah, man. How could you not tell us?” Minhyuk added on as Bin shook his head in disappointment at the two of you.
“Believe me, it was a surprise for us, too.” You joked as Myungjun turned to you and wrapped his arms around you in a back-breaking hug.
“Well, I’m happy for you two. I think we were just all surprised it took you two this long.” Bin smiled at the two of you as he took a sip of his champagne. You and Dongmin briefly made eye contact before awkwardly smiling at the group.
“Yeah, that’s what everyone’s been saying.” Dongmin slipped his hand back into yours, giving it a gentle squeeze. You gave him a small smile, trying to give off the best “head-over-heels in love” vibe that you could. You weren’t sure how convincing you were being, but Dongmin always was a good actor. He’d make it work.
At some point in the party, you’d ended up at the drinks table, a champagne flute in your hand as you leaned against the wall, trying to recharge from being bombarded with questions and congratulations from people you’d never met. You weren’t sure where Dongmin had ended up- the last you saw, he’d been taken aside by Minhyuk’s father to talk about some business stuff that you didn’t understand nor particularly care about.
You were content with standing in the corner people-watching before someone you hadn’t spoken to for years sidled up to you.
“Well, don’t you look nice?”
You froze in place when you heard the voice of Park Jinwoo addressing you. You slowly turned your head in his direction. Shit. He looked really good. You’d had a little bit of a crush- no, you’d had a massive crush on him while you were in highschool. He was one of Dongmin’s closest friends back in the day, but you’d only seen him a few times since he’d gotten back from university. You thought he was really cute back then, but he’d really grown into his looks. He’d gotten a little bit taller (at least, he was a little bit taller than you, now), he’d gotten a nice haircut, you could tell he’s been hitting the gym, and from your many late nights staying up late stalking his Instagram, you knew that he’d gotten a few tattoos. And he’s single.
“Oh…Hey, Jinwoo. Nice to see you again.”
“No need to be so formal. We’ve known each other a long time.” Jinwoo stood next to you and leaned on the wall, mirroring your stance. “Congrats on the engagement by the way. Didn’t see that one coming.”
“Really?” You scoffed, taking a sip of champagne, “seems like you’re the only one who didn’t.”
“Yeah, well, I was under the impression that you were into someone else until now.”
His statement caused you to choke on your champagne. You cleared your throat and shook your head. Jinwoo stayed silent, simply smirking at you as he took a sip of wine. “Well, I guess you were wrong.”
“Guess so. It’s funny, I was so sure I was right. I mean, it’s not every day someone you haven’t spoken to in years likes one of your four-year-old Instagram posts at three in the morning.”
You were about to refute his accusation before you were cut off by a very welcome interruption. “You two enjoying yourselves?” Dongmin approached the two of you, a glass of champagne in hand, and an indecipherable look on his face. He stood right beside you, wrapping his arm around your waist, staring directly at Jinwoo.
“Just fine.” Jinwoo replied with the same smirk as before, taking a sip of wine as he eyed Dongmin. “You two look good together.”
“Yeah. We do.”
The vibe of the room had massively shifted since Dongmin had approached you two. His hand had moved down from your waist to your hip, and he was holding you tighter than ever. Your eyes darted between Jinwoo and Dongmin, waiting for one of them to say something, but they both remained quiet, their eye contact unwavering.
“Well, I’m happy for you two. See you at the wedding.” Jinwoo gave you a quick wink before flashing Dongmin a smirk and walking off into the crowd. You looked up at Dongmin who still had that look on his face. You’d never seen that look before.
“Let’s go.” He said, grabbing your hand and walking in the direction of the front door.
“Go where?”
“Home.”
“Whose home?”
“Mine.”
“Why?”
“I don’t want to be here.”
“Okay…But maybe we should say goodbye to your parents and friends first?”
Dongmin paused in his tracks, you could see him roll his eyes before nodding in agreement. He dragged you around the house to bid quick goodbyes to his family and friends before he walked the two of you to the foyer, helping you with your coat, and dragging you into his car. He’d driven the two of you there himself, and you were honestly worried that in his current mood, the night was going to end up with the two of you crashing into a tree.
You stayed silent for the first few minutes of the trip, your hands folded in your lap. You’d rarely seen Dongmin so irritated- his hands were tightly gripping the steering feel, and you could practically hear his jaw clenching. You felt like a scolded child the way you were so hesitant to say anything to him.
“Are you okay?”
Dongmin sighed heavily. Glancing over at you, his demeanor melting as he saw you staring at him with that concerned look on your face. His grip on the steering wheel relaxed, and he reached over to hold your left hand in his own, his thumb lightly brushing over your ring finger.
“I’m okay. Just tired, I guess.”
The two of you stayed silent for the rest of the drive to Dongmin’s penthouse. The car was filled with a tense air, even as Dongmin gently held your hand, you couldn’t help but feel you’d done something wrong.
The two of you made your way up to Dongmin’s apartment, turning off the alarm and kicking your shoes off as soon as you were in the door. Without a word, Dongmin went straight to his bedroom, leaving you sighing as you made your way to the guest room. Usually your apartment was the designated hangout spot, Dongmin always said it was more “cozy”, but you’d still stayed over at Dongmin’s enough for you to have a drawer of clothes in his guest room and a toothbrush in the bathroom.
You had been laying in bed for at least an hour at that point. You’d tried to sleep, you really had, but you couldn’t stop thinking about what you could have possibly said to make Dongmin act the way he did. So you resorted to scrolling on your phone to calm your mind, before you heard a light knock on the bedroom door.
You padded over to it, cracking it open to see Dongmin on the other side, nervously shifting his weight between his feet.
“Hey…” He whispered, leaning on the doorway as he looked around the room, doing all he could to not make direct eye contact with you. “I…I guess I wanted to apologize for being a total dickhead tonight.”
“Yeah…You kinda were.”
He smiled at the ground, his eyes still not meeting yours. “Well, I’m sorry. I just…I don’t know. I don’t really have an excuse.”
His eyes finally met yours.
“Are we cool?”
You let out a short laugh and rolled your eyes, poking his arm before responding, “we were always cool.”
He smiled fondly down at you, reaching his arms out, prompting you to lean into him and wrap your arms around his waist, your head comfortably resting on his chest. The two of you stood silently for a minute, his head resting on top of yours. Before pulling away, he gave you a quick peck on top of your head, flashing you a quick smile before taking a step back.
“Goodnight, fiancée.”
“Goodnight, fiance.”
You were friends. Best friends. You always would be. But you were starting to like hearing him call you that.
June 20th
You thought it would be over by now. You thought it would’ve been a few months, a couple family dinners, maybe a fancy corporate party or two, Dongmin’s parents would give him a job in the company, and you could call off your engagement and go back to your normal lives. And yet here you were, six months later. Still engaged- fake engaged. Every time you got together with Dongmin’s family, he’d whisper to you, “I’m sure they’re gonna give the news tonight.” and yet, they never did. And both of your families and all of your friends were still convinced that the two of you were a happy soon-to-be-wed couple. His parents had even spent Easter at your family’s house. It was starting to feel too real.
And now here you were, sitting in a private plane, getting ready to embark on an all expenses paid two week long vacation to Lake Como- where the Lee family apparently owned a large plot of property. Because of course they did. You hadn’t ever realized exactly how wealthy Dongmin’s family was until you’d gotten engaged to him, and you felt more insecure in your own life by the day because of it.
“You want some more champagne?” At the question, you removed one of your earbuds and looked up from the book in your lap to Dongmin, who was sitting across from you, headphones on with his iPad resting on top of the table between the two of you. You shook your head wordlessly, putting the earbud back in place and returning to the book that you honestly couldn’t have relayed the plot of even with a gun to your head.
Planes are so boring.
Dongmin smirked up at you as if he could tell what was on your mind. “Told you you should have brought your laptop.”
“Shut up.” You muttered, flipping to the next page as if you were actually reading. “Why would I want to bring my laptop when I’m going to Italy? I don’t know about you, but I’m intending to actually enjoy myself while we’re there.”
“I don’t think Dongmin could enjoy himself without bringing his iPad.” His younger brother piped up from the seat across the aisle.
“You’re literally playing Roblox right now.” Dongmin rolled his eyes as he removed his headphones.
“You cannot stop me from grinding on Dress To Impress.”
“You’re like, twenty five.”
“Yeah, and I’m absolutely eating these little kids up.”
“That’s a disturbing sentence.”
“You’re making it weird.”
“Back me up here.” Dongmin addressed you, taking his headphones off and tossing them to the side.
You stuck your tongue out at him before tossing your book in the same direction as his headphones- you’d finally given up on trying to read.
“You’re the worst.” Dongmin sighed.
“You like it.”
“I don’t get you two.”
The two of you quickly turned to Dongmin’s brother, who was still staring at his computer screen, undoubtedly still beefing with middle schoolers on Roblox.
“What do you mean?” Your voice cracked slightly as you asked the question. You could see Dongmin grimacing at it from across the table.
“I mean, you two have been together for like, years at this point. But I’ve never even seen you two kiss.”
“Years-? I mean, yeah. But what’s your point?” Dongmin stumbled over his words, crossing both his legs and arms in a painfully conspicuous fashion.
“I don’t know, it’s just weird. Are you two on some like, hardcore, celibate, not even kissing until you get married shit? I find that hard to believe since you’re like, always at each other's apartments- also like, why don’t you two just move in together? I’ve been to both of your guys’ places, and Dongmin’s is like, way nicer. I don’t know, you guys just aren’t like, a normal couple.”
You were in shock at how hard Dongmin’s brother clocked you. You hadn’t thought of any of that. Why the hell wouldn’t you two have kissed? Normal engaged people kiss. The two of you had never even had your mouths anywhere near each other.
“I’m sorry I haven’t ever made out with my fiancée in front of my little brother. That’s not something I’m into.” Dongmin mused as he picked up his headphones from the floor of the plane, placing them back over his head and resuming his show. You let out a silent sigh of relief at his smooth recovery.
This was going to become a problem.
June 25th
You hadn't realized that mega yachts were a real thing until this morning when you and the Lee’s packed into the fancy black car that picked you up at their summer home and brought you to the lake, where you were met with the largest boat you’d ever laid eyes on.
After being “confronted” about your strange relationship by Dongmin’s brother on the plane, that same night, you and Dongmin stayed up late in your shared room discussing ways to make your relationship seem more natural.
“Well, we can’t just like, make out in front of your family.” You mused from your side of the ginormous bed in the room that had been assigned to you and Dongmin.
“Normal people don’t make out with each other in front of their families, I don’t think.” He agreed from his side of the bed, “But maybe, we could just like, I don’t know, maybe give each other a little peck on the cheek once in a while. Or call each other stupid pet names like ‘babe’ or ‘sweet cheeks’.”
“If you call me sweet cheeks, I will kill you.”
“No sweet cheeks, then.” Dongmin tossed his phone across the bed and turned to look at you, propping himself up on his elbow. You turned to him with a raised brow, tossing your phone in the same direction.
“What?”
“This is fun.” He smiled up at you, twirling a loose string on the blanket around his finger.
“Is it really?”
“Yeah.” He whispered before turning his back to you and flicking the “off” switch on the lamp on his bedside table. You settled into your pillows and breathed out a heavy sigh. You were having much less fun with this than Dongmin was.
You were currently laying down in a lounge chair on the bow of the yacht in your swimsuit, pretending to watch Dongmin as he repeatedly jumped off the side of the boat and clambered back up, asking you each time to rate his jump and the following splash. Dongmin’s brother was in the chair beside you, arm over his eyes, probably taking a nap. You were going to have to wake him up soon to tell him to reapply his sunscreen.
“Babe, watch this!” Dongmin called out to you, prompting you to look over to him, your hand shielding the sun from your eyes so you could see your fiance’s grinning face as he took a few steps back, dripping water onto the freshly mopped floor. He ran forward and jumped off the boat once again, you could see him lurch forward right before he leapt in what you were sure was a poorly executed attempt at a front-flip.
You grimaced as you heard the splash- you had a feeling that he’d landed face-first. Your suspicions were confirmed as you heard coughing as Dongmin climbed up the side of the boat. As soon as he made it back onto the bow, he walked over to where you were laying, and sat down on the ground next to your chair, laying his head on top of your bare thigh. You patted his back as he continued coughing weakly- trying your hardest to keep from laughing at your friend.
“That was great. Ten out of ten.”
He looked back up at you, a look of pure disdain on his face. “I hate you so much.”
You giggled and ran your hands through his hair. He rolled his eyes at you as he rested his chin on your thigh, closing his eyes as you continued running your fingers through his hair, nails scratching his scalp in a soothing manner. You were worried that you were laying on the “head-over-heels in love” thing too thick, but your worries were immediately quelled as Dongmin’s mother entered the scene.
“You two are just so sweet.” She giggled as she approached you, tightly gripping her full glass of champagne.
“They’re disgusting.” Dongmin’s brother protested from his spot, finally waking up from his nap.
“You’re just jealous.” Dongmin teased, discreetly flipping his brother off as his mother settled into her seat on the younger brother’s opposite side.
“You two have been all up in each other’s business since we landed. Is that Italian air really getting to you guys that much? My room’s right next to yours, I’m just glad you two are quiet when you bang.”
You were so sure he was onto you.
“You poor thing.” Dongmin mused as he wrapped his arms around your leg, “You’ll understand when you’re older.”
His brother simply rolled his eyes and laid back down, placing his arm back over his eyes. You turned back to Dongmin, who was already looking up at you with a lazy smile. You hated these moments. The moments that made this whole thing feel like a part of it was real. Because why were you here on a yacht in Italy with his family, with his head on your thigh, and a ring on your finger if no part of it was real?
“I’ll be right back, baby.” Dongmin whispered as he stood up. He leaned over and gently put his hand on the side of your face, giving a short, sweet kiss to your forehead before going inside.
You watched as he walked back inside, trying not to lose your mind as you heard his mother drunkenly giggling from behind you.
God, you hated this.
July 5th
It was the night before the end of your vacation in Italy, and you just couldn’t wait to go home.
Sharing a bed with Dongmin every night of the past two weeks had been nothing short of torture. It wasn’t like he’d been all up in your space, and he didn’t snore- actually, he was very quiet and very respectful of the invisible line that you’d drawn in the middle of the bed, sticking exclusively to his side, and keeping all of his clothes on- despite the fact that you knew he usually slept in just his underwear.
But you often found yourself awake into the early hours of the morning just staring at his back, trying to push the random romantic scenarios about your best friend that your brain was making up into the back of your mind. You told yourself that it was all just because of the atmosphere. I mean, what else are you supposed to think when you’re sharing a bed in a romantic villa in Italy? You were just excited to go back home and sleep in your own bed. Alone.
But here you were, sitting out on the balcony that was attached to your room, glass of red wine in hand as you listened to Dongmin ramble on about something that you couldn’t pay attention to- not while the moon was out in full and it just lit up his features so beautifully.
“You know what I’m talking about?” Dongmin turned to you, his eyes scanning over your face that was undoubtedly just staring up at him blankly.
“Not really.” You hummed taking a big sip of your wine, your eyes met his and you immediately looked away, opting to stare out into the beautiful Italian nature instead of at your beautiful best friend’s face.
“You okay?” Dongmin asked softly, nudging your arm much softer than he usually would.
You took an even bigger sip of wine. “I’ll be okay. Just ready to go home, I guess.”
“Yeah…” He sighed, his eyes still on you. “It’s getting pretty late. You ready to go to bed?”
You were going to miss him saying that.
“Yeah.”
You got ready for bed as slowly as possible, dragging the process out as long as you could. You could feel Dongmin’s eyes on you as you slowly brushed your teeth, and again as you were brushing your hair, and again as you exited the bathroom after getting into your pajamas, and again as you climbed into bed.
The two of you laid there in silence in the dark until, simultaneously, you turned to each other. As soon as your eyes met each other, you could feel your eyes welling up. You didn’t want this to be over.
“You sure you’re okay?” Dongmin whispered, shuffling a little bit closer to you. In the moonlight peeking through the curtains, you could see the worried look in his eyes. You nodded quickly, staying still as he reached out to brush your hair out of your face. His fingers lingered over your jawline, causing goosebumps to raise on your skin. “You know, I’m really glad that you were able to come on this trip. I think I’d have gone insane without you here.”
“Yeah?” You whispered back, the feeling of his fingers on your jaw causing your mind to struggle to come up with a witty reply.
“Yeah.” He breathed out, moving his hand to stroke his thumb across your cheekbone, brushing away the tear that you hadn’t realized had fallen. “You’re the best fake fiancée I’ve ever had.”
Right. Fake.
“High praise.” You joked, causing Dongmin to flash you a grin that made your heart ache. You loved his smile.
“I love you, you know? You’re my best friend.”
Friend. Friend. You needed to hammer that word into your mind.
“I love you too, Dongmin.”
He ran his thumb over your cheek one last time before leaning forward to press a kiss to the tip of your nose, bidding you a goodnight, and turning back around- leaving you laying there, staring blankly at his back
You were so screwed.
December 21st
Eleven months. Eleven. Months.
You’d been engaged to your best friend for almost an entire year.
After your trip to Lake Como, things started to become more complicated. Dongmin’s parents had started asking the two of you to set a date and start looking at venues, menus, dresses, suits, flowers, honeymoon destinations, guest lists- you name it. Your acting in Italy had apparently shown them how “in love” you were with each other, and they were eager for the two of you to finally tie the knot. You had been holding them off by telling them that you wanted to wait until the new year for all of that, but they, especially his mother, were all too ready to get involved in the wedding planning.
You’d started hating being engaged to Dongmin. Every time the two of you were alone together, it just reminded you of your last night in Italy. The way he held your face so gently, and the way he wiped away your tear was constantly on your mind.
But you doubted he even noticed the tense air whenever the two of you met up, as he had been sulking since the end of the summer over the fact that his parents still hadn’t offered him a job yet.
But today was the day of his parents Christmas party, and he was so sure that they would offer it to him tonight. You had your doubts.
The two of you were getting ready in Dongmin’s apartment as you usually did for his parents' parties. You were wearing a beautiful forest green satin dress that you'd gotten as a bridesmaid for an old friend, and the same heels that you’d worn when Dongmin had proposed to you almost a year ago. You were waiting in the foyer for Dongmin to come out of his room, tapping your foot as the seconds ticked by.
“Alright, you ready to go?” He asked in a jovial tone as he entered the room, fixing the cuffs of his suit jacket. He looked up at you in anticipation and stopped in his tracks, his hand freezing on his sleeve as his eyes wandered over your form.
You stood there silently for a good few seconds, waiting for him to say something. But he didn’t. “...Yeah?”
His eyes snapped up to your face and he slightly shook his head, dropping his hands from his sleeve. “Right! Okay, let’s go, then.”
He hurriedly turned off the lights and set the alarm before helping you with your jacket, and offering his elbow to you. You gave him a suspicious glare, but he just grinned at you, guiding you downstairs to where his driver was waiting.
|
You were drunk. But you felt the need to be even drunker. The two of you had been at the party for around an hour when Dongmin’s father tapped the side of his champagne glass and made an announcement: He was finally letting Dongmin into the company. At first, you turned to Dongmin ecstatically, pressing a firm kiss to his cheek and hugging him tightly. He’d wanted this for so long.
But then you remembered.
It was over now.
You and Dongmin had agreed in the beginning that you would be engaged only until his parents offered him a job at their company. You’d agreed to this. You knew this was coming. So why were you sitting in an empty room crying into your champagne?
You didn’t look up as you heard the door open, you were assuming that it was a drunk couple looking for some privacy until you heard a familiar voice speak up.
“Any particular reason you’re sitting alone crying into your champagne?” None other than Park Jinwoo asked as he sidled into the room, his hands tucked into the pockets of his beautifully fitting dark blue suit.
You tearfully chuckled, wiping the tears from your cheeks. “You know, I was just asking myself that question.” You looked up at Jinwoo who was leaning on his shoulder against an ornate bookshelf, looking down on you with a placid look on his face.
“Trouble in paradise?” He mused as he dragged his finger down the spine of one of the books.
You scoffed at him, leaning back in your chair as you downed the rest of your champagne in one gulp. “Something like that.”
“That’s a shame…He’s been head over heels for you since high school, so I can’t imagine what could have happened.”
Your eyes snapped up to him, he looked back down at you with a knowing smirk. “What do you mean by that, Jinwoo?”
He shrugged his shoulders casually, as if to brush off your question. “I don’t know. What do you think it means?”
“I’m so not in the mood for your bullshit.”
“Fair enough. Should probably be getting back to the party anyway.” He offered a hand to you which you rolled your eyes at before taking, allowing him to help you out of your chair. “You’d better get back to your fiance. It’s not a good idea for a pretty girl to be drunk and alone at a party.”
Jinwoo didn’t let go of your hand until the two of you were out in the hallway. He gave you a one-armed hug, smirking into your ear, “well, speak of the devil.”
You turned to see Dongmin standing at the other end of the hall, staring at the two of you, an undoubtedly shocked expression casted over his face.
“See you later.” Jinwoo turned and gave you a wave over his shoulder, leaving you standing in the hallway, swaying slightly. You shouldn’t have chugged that glass of champagne. But as soon as you started to feel a little too dizzy, Dongmin was by your side, his steady hands holding onto your waist.
You leaned into him with a deep sigh, wrapping your arms around his neck. As soon as the side of your face made contact with his chest, you felt your eyes welling up. He gently stroked the back of your head, confused at your demeanor, but wanting to offer whatever comfort he could nonetheless.
He pressed his lips to the top of your head, gently rubbing his nose into your hair. “What’s wrong, baby?”
You choked back a sob as you pressed your face into his chest even harder. “Please don’t call me that.”
His hand went still on the back of your head. “Why?”
You took a shaky breath, bringing your hands to his back, gripping into his suit jacket. “Cause it’s over now. Right?”
Dongmin stayed silent, opting to continue gently stroking your hair instead of responding, letting you cry off your makeup into his expensive suit.
“I think I should take you home.” He said to you softly, gently unwrapping your arms from around his body. You sniffled and feebly attempted to wipe away the tears from your face, not daring to look Dongmin in the eye. You nodded at the ground and allowed him to guide you to the front door and help you put on your coat.
“Stay here for a second. I’m gonna go say goodbye to my parents.” You nodded gently, staring down at your shoes. You’ve never felt so pathetic in your life.
Dongmin returned a minute later, gently taking your hand and leading you to the car. The two of you sat in silence, Dongmin running his thumb over your knuckles, and you, staring out the window, not even bothering to wipe the tears that were running down your face.
You knew it had to come to an end eventually. You always did. But it still hurt.
The car pulled up to Dongmin’s penthouse, and you mindlessly let Dongmin lead you up to his apartment. Your brain was practically dead at that point. He could have been taking you to an old abandoned house to murder you and you wouldn’t have noticed, nor would you have particularly cared.
You let him help you take off your jacket and heels and lead you to his room. He motioned for you to sit down on his bed, which you did, flopping onto it, laying flat on your back, folding your hands over your stomach in an attempt to soothe its churning. Dongmin sighed as he watched you lay down, taking off his suit jacket, shoes, and tie, and sitting down next to you.
“Do you want the ring back?” Your voice cracked as you asked the question, your eyes threatening to shed even more tears. Dongmin sighed as he leaned back, laying down next to you.
“No. I bought it for you.”
Your lips trembled at his words, you quickly wiped away the tears that had started to spill. “I don’t want this to be over.” You finally choked out, your hand covering your mouth to stifle your sobs.
“I know.” Dongmin replied gently, reaching over to wrap his arm under you, prompting you to roll over and dig your face into his chest. “It’s okay.” He whispered as you cried into him. “You’re just drunk. You’ll feel better tomorrow.”
“No, I won’t.”
“You’ll be okay.”
“No, I won’t.”
“Why do you think that?”
“Because I don’t want to lose you.”
Dongmin held you tighter at those words, his brow furrowing as you said it. “You’re not going to lose me, baby.”
“I just want to stay with you.”
“We’ll always be together.”
“It’s going to be different now.” Your tear ducts had finally run dry. You just felt defeated now. Dongmin still held you just as tight as before, one hand on your waist and the other on the back of your head.
“It doesn’t have to be.”
“Yes, it does.”
This time it was Dongmin’s turn to cry. Yet, he smiled. “I love you.”
“God, don’t say that to me.” You sighed into his neck, rubbing your sore eyes as tears continued to run down Dongmin’s face.
“No, but it’s true. I love you so much.”
You pulled away, he was starting to confuse you. You propped yourself up on your elbow to get a better look at him. Your confusion grew as you saw him smiling up at you through his tears. “What are you talking about?”
Dongmin leaned up and reached for your face, holding it in the same way he had during that night in Italy, his fingers on your jawline and his thumb stroking your cheek. “I don’t want this to be over, either.”
“...Are you drunk?”
He grinned up at you and brought his other hand to your cheek, looking at you with a kind of fondness you’d never seen on his face before. “Definitely not. I just love you.”
“Dongmin, what are you saying?”
“I’m saying I love you.”
“Yeah, you’ve said that a few times.” You replied, sitting up fully, Dongmin following you, still holding your face. “But what do you mean?”
Dongmin gently smiled down at you, one of his hands trailing down from your face to take your left hand, gently sliding the ring off your finger. Your heart dropped as he did so, tears once more threatening to start spilling from your eyes.
“Will you marry me?”
Your breath hitched in your throat, you completely froze in place as Dongmin slid off the bed and onto the floor, kneeling in front of you, still holding your left hand in his gentle grip.
“..Huh?”
He chuckled at you fondly, his eyes filled with nothing but adoration, and love spread across his face.
“I want to marry you. For real.” His eyes and smile softened as you stared down at him in shock, “At the start of this, I really did just see this me asking you for a favor. I really thought that at the end of this, we would call off the engagement, and go about our lives as normal. I didn’t expect this to go on this long, and I never expected to realize that I was in love with my best friend, but I did. I think I realized it for the first time in Italy. I loved going to sleep next to you every night and waking up next to you every morning, I loved seeing you with my parents and my brother, I loved sitting on the balcony drinking wine with you, I just loved spending every minute of every day with you. And it made me realize that I love you. As more than a friend. And I think I always have.”
He shifted in his spot on the floor, nervously looking up at your confused stare. He really hoped he wasn’t making a mistake by telling you right now.
“It made me realize that I wished this was for real. So, do you want to make it real?”
Just as he was starting to think that he was making a massive mistake by confessing his love to his best friend, you quickly slid off the bed onto the floor, and hugged him tightly, causing him to fall backwards onto the carpet.
“God, I love you so much.” You whispered into his neck, holding him tighter than you’d ever held anyone. He was smiling so hard, he was sure his face could have gotten stuck that way. He hugged you back just as tightly before pulling back and grabbing your face, causing your eyes to meet his.
“So is that a yes?”
“Obviously. Yes!”
Dongmin grabbed your left hand, sliding the ring back onto your finger before his hands quickly went up to the sides of your face and his lips collided with yours. Your hands gripped the back of his shirt as your lips moved against his, fighting back the happy tears that welled in your eyes.
Dongmin pulled back for breath, breathing heavily as he leaned his forehead against yours. He opened his eyes and met yours, “I love you.”
“I know.”
the two of you giggled quietly before your lips met again.
December 22nd
You woke the next morning in Dongmin’s bed, your dress and his suit lay wrinkled on the floor. You groaned into the pillow and turned to your side, almost jumping as you were met with the face of your fiance sleeping soundly next to you.
You smiled softly, brushing his soft hair out of his face, admiring his features in the early morning light.
His eyes fluttered open slowly, reaching up in confusion to grab your hand that was lightly grazing his face. He smiled warmly and leaned into your hand as soon as he realized it was you. “Good morning.” He groaned, his deep morning voice causing your stomach to flutter.
“Good morning.” You replied gently, pressing a soft kiss to his lips. He looked up at you softly, pressing a kiss to the palm of your hand before slowly sitting up and tossing back the blankets.
“How about I make us some pancakes?” He called over his shoulder as he made his way to the bathroom.
“Sounds good.” You stretched and sat up as Dongmin turned on the shower in the other room.
“You coming?” He called out, you smiled and shimmied out from the blankets, your feet meeting the soft carpet on the floor.
“Just a second!”
You could get used to this.
#rec ❀˖°#I honestly forget the entire progression of us becoming friends#I don’t remember who reached out first if it was me or you but#I do remember the eunwoo instagram series and me wanting you to finish them for the other members too#finding a true aroha who was still active and posting abt astro#felt like once in a lifetime tbh#and still does KDJKSS#so glad we’re friends god IDJDKJS#and I hope I can continue to feed both of our astro ideas and delusions#cause it’s rly just us two in this empty fandom 💔💔
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also im throwing this here bc i have a dream tag for a reason
(copied from my dms to a friend)
ok so basically. i dont remember if it was televised or not (i THINK it might have been bc someone later mentions cutting something out if absolutely necessary but i never saw cameras anywhere or anything so???). i was on some sort of like… not survivor exactly lmao but a competition thing that was probably some sort of reality show too?
and idk there was this guy that i had the biggest crush on in high school (also unfortunately not the first time ive dreamed abt him like this ughh) who was on my team a lot and he'd continuously be flirty w me? holding my hand and saying stuff, teasing me, etc. like i think it was going on before the dream n whatnot bc i felt like it'd been happening for a while if tht makes sense since i only came in on like. Not The First Episode lmao
and idk we're all teamed up for something, waiting on ppl to pass word around or w/e, and he's literally sitting there with an arm around me, playing with my fingers when a woman on another team calls out something to him about how '(name) doesn't like you now, but give her a week lol, i'm sure she'll change her mind" (whoever it was was like. on another team entirely, im not subbing out my gov name haha id just say daisy) and i remember being like… SO thrown like um. what. why is she saying that. and the guy kinda laughs it off or w/e and says its just a joke but idk i think it bothered me a lot bc of what happens next
where we're like. in a car. taking turns getting out every so often to check around the city for more details for the quest we're supposed to be fulfilling? so that we can ykno pass it. and at one point its just the two of us in the car and im like 'you kno what, im done. i used to have the biggest crush on you in high school, but i never said or did anything because i was scared of getting hurt, and i know you never liked me back anyway so it didnt matter--but im tired of hiding it' and idk what he said back but it ended w him being kinda mad and him getting out of the car since our other teammate came back and hes like 'its ur turn' or w/e (clearly upset) so i go off to do w/e
and idk i barely remember the rest of it from there. i found the clues that we needed, we come back together, my team splits bc not all of us have to participate in the challenge (it was some sort of dance thing lol so i was automatically taken out like 'we've seen u' and i was like 'fair'). and idk i started feeling guilty bc i just kinda assumed his feelings on the situation + didn't rly let him talk. i don't remember if we got to talk before or after a small bit of someone pulling us aside like 'ok we CAN edit that whole confession situation out because it's messy but also please let us keep it in because it's messy'
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ok ok imagine spencer dating someone in the BAU and he’s been wanting to propose but is waiting for the perfect moment, then after a rly tough, emotionally draining case (maybe there was some kind of close call where she almost got hurt) he ends up proposing when it’s just the two of them in the elevator leaving the BAU once the case is over, because he can’t bare the thought of her spending one more second not knowing that he wants to spend the rest of his life with her ok I’m gonna cry now
here's what i think. also, the elevator takes hours, that's just how it is
Spencer was almost asleep in the elevator, head resting against your shoulder which was awkward because of how tall he was and odd because you're rarely physically affectionate at work. He couldn't sleep on the jet, and he desperately needed it. It was the perfect storm of a hard and long case.
"Should we get Thai?" You offer.
"No." He shakes his head. You frown because it's his favorite, and he can sense it. "You'll have to drive all the way across DC."
"So?" You ask. "I'll fly the jet across the country to get you comfort food."
He snorts and it's the happiest sound that's come out of him for an entire week. "Don't think Hotch would appreciate that."
"Being your girlfriend is more important than my job." You remind him.
Spencer's head snaps up so quickly you're worried about what he just thought of. "I don't want you to just be my girlfriend. I want you to be my wife."
Your eyes widen at his sudden declaration, but you laugh it off. "You must be pretty tired."
"I'm not kidding." He says firmly. "I'm so in love with you and I don't ever want anything to...happen."
You can see his brain start to race through possibilities. "Hey, hey, hey." You shake your head, cupping his cheeks. His eyes dart to your lips, and you lean forward to kiss him passionately. "Nothing's going to happen." You assure him.
"So, you'll marry me?" He asks hopefully as if there's any chance in the world you'll say no.
He probably could have asked you on your first date and you would have said yes. "Of course, but do you even have a ring?"
He's much more onto it that time, opening his satchel, producing a ring box, and once again surprising you. "I've had it for an embarrassingly long time."
You hold your hand over your mouth in shock, eyes filling with tears. This is not how you expected your night to go. "So, show me?" You mumble from behind your hand.
He flicks open the box, producing the most gorgeous ring you've ever seen. The tears are free flowing after that. "I hope that means I did an alright job?" He asks, grateful he was a profiler because otherwise he'd think her crying over the ring was a bad thing.
"There's really nothing you can't do, is there?" You wonder rhetorically. "It's perfect, I love it, I love you, and there's nothing I want more than to be your wife."
He takes your hand, sliding the ring onto your finger where it looks even more like it belongs. "I love you too."
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professor ackerman | one shot
pairing: levi x reader
word count: 6.7K
tw: oral (f. receiving), fingering (f. receiving), penetrative sex, swearing, levi is an authority figure (professor), dom/sub dynamic, degradation/humiliation, cheating on an s/o, age gap (both adults - early 20s/late 30s), name-calling [slut, whore], daddy kink, size/stretching kink, spanking, pinching, biting, not explicit dumbification but definite vibes, brief mention of cuckholding, gagging, choking, creampie, i need to find a healthier hobby
themes: modern au, professor!levi, writer!levi, professor/student, enemies with benefits, mc's boyfriend (reiner) is right on the other side of the wall, levi is jealous and possessive as fuck, and all of that wonderful stuff in the tw^
tags: @number-0-iz @propertyoftoru @commanderawkward @thenamesholly @shortmexicangirl @missyasma @syubseokie @ceceofthevalley | reply to be added!! (p.s. hi taglist guys, this is a bonus chapter and tbh deviates a little bit from what actually happened but it is an update nonetheless)
note: hi so this is technically a bonus chapter for eloquent, but it's super easy to understand without context. this is just extremely shameless smut and for some reason the longest chapter of anything i've ever written. also, it's in levi's pov, which i personally find rly hot but let me know if you hate it. anyway this is disgusting, i can't believe i'm putting this on the internet, i hope you love it. here's a quick catch-up if not knowing the plot bothers you:
The reader is a graduate writing student studying under your advisor, published author Dr. Levi Ackerman. The two of you quickly find that you don't get along, with almost every meeting ending in tears or a screaming match. Still, an undeniable sexual tension pervades over both of you as you navigate the rocky relationship. Your boyfriend insists on escorting you to his office this week for moral support, oblivious to the steamy moment you had shared with Dr. Ackerman the Tuesday before. Seeing Reiner's hands on you, jealousy starts to take hold of Levi.
LEVI
When Levi pulls the door shut, the incessant ringing in his ears is finally a peaceful, eerie quiet. He watches you as you sweep your hands over your skirt to keep it stuck to your thighs as you take a seat in the plush armchair provided by the university — coarse to the touch, and creamy white, with coral-colored flowers splattered across its upholstery. You’re stiff.
He silently counts how long he’s known you now, but he isn’t confident in his calculations; he guesses four or five weeks, so he’ll call it a month. Long enough to pick up on a few things — how you chew your cheek when you’re nervous, and tuck your head to the ground. He’s noticed that on certain occasions you hold his gaze just a bit too long, and that when you look at the carpet afterward, it’s because your cheeks are blazing.
Does he revel in this? Absolutely. In fact, Levi had come to understand his feelings for you in recent weeks. He’d taken some time to rationalize it, and it seemed obvious: you’re a beautiful, intelligent, feisty young girl pining after his approval. It’s a stereotypical male fantasy, after all. However, he is professional enough to put that aside — or so he thought. Before he had the pleasure of meeting Reiner.
The moment the tall, blond oaf put his meaty hand on the small of your back is when Levi realized that he may have a much larger problem than he had assumed. He couldn’t see behind you, but he could picture those stubby fingers pressing into your skin — and, for whatever reason, this notion reminds him of the fact that you’re sleeping with him. He nearly shivers thinking of it again; he’s an expert at staying stoic, but you push his boundaries from time to time.
Although he has thankfully broken free of the hellscape that was standing in the waiting room with you and your “boyfriend,” Levi is not comforted. If anything, he’s a little more hazy. His temper has been quicker than usual as of late, with little to no help from you. As he walks over to face you, he shuffles through a thousand pressing questions — all of the loud variety, livened with intensely colorful language.
As he strides toward the chair on his side of the desk, your timid frame pulls him in like gravity. He makes a split second decision. Swallowing hard, he speaks. “I’m not reading anything today. I don’t really feel like it.” He turns early as he passes your chair, coming to rest on the edge of his desk; without waiting even a moment, Levi’s trying to find your eyes — but you don’t yield to him. You keep them turned to the ground as you tuck the folder to your side and suck in an irritated breath.
He writes it off as nerves, giving you the benefit of the doubt, but he decides then that he won’t give any second chances today. He isn’t fond of how sharp your tongue has gotten with him. Perhaps you understand the message in his glare despite refusing to meet it — because you oblige. When you speak up, your tone is bouncy and agreeable. It might be believable if you weren’t twirling your hair into intricate knots.
“Okay,” you say, and Levi almost jumps at the sound. You’ve taken your fingers out of your hair and switched to picking at the skin around your thumb. “Do you want to discuss something specific about —”
He wants to groan and roll his eyes, but he refrains. “No,” he interrupts you, tired of waiting. The sound startles you, and you finally meet his gaze. His eyes lock onto yours, studying them as closely as you’ll allow. He needs to gain control of this situation quickly, or he is going to have a nervous break. “You seem anxious. Why?”
The corners of your mouth turn up, but you smother them back down. He watches the gears move in your mind as you think, but it doesn’t take long for you to come up with an answer. “You’re kind of intimidating,” you say, and you’re smiling apologetically. “And after last week. . .”
This makes Levi angry. It’s a little irrational, but real anger nonetheless. He can’t comprehend how you could possibly still be hung up on him scolding you — for acting like a complete dumbass, at that. Not to mention the two impossibly suffocating elephants in the room: the fact that all he wants to do right now is kiss you, and the fact that the man that escorted you here is sitting right outside.
Levi takes a breath, but he doesn’t calm down. “That was last week. You fucked up, and I told you so. I said what I wanted to,” he snaps. Suddenly, as he watches you cower just slightly at the harshness of his tone, he makes several decisions all at once. For one, he decides he doesn't want to see other men touch you. As his eyes wander momentarily down your body, sliding past the achingly short hem of your pretty little schoolgirl skirt and over the slopes of your thighs, he can’t help but imagine the sounds you make when your “boyfriend” pushes the pleated fabric up to your hips. Your legs are crossed so tightly — but he can see you letting them spread, your knees just far enough apart for Levi’s hips to fit snugly. He then decides that he’s so, so sick of holding his hands back from you.
Levi looks back up at you, feeling his slacks growing a little tighter around him as you meet his gaze. You’re like a deer in headlights. He leans in just a millimeter, wandering vision flashing to the skin just below the hem of your skirt once more before his decisions are final. A grin pokes at one corner of his mouth.
“What makes me so intimidating, would you say?” Levi asks, surrendering himself over to Mr. Hyde. His voice is smoother now — more collected — and he suddenly carries himself as if he has a goal in mind. He watches everything, eyes piercing and pressing with the precision of a hawk. He sees your eyebrows shoot upward, but he just nods as if to ask the question once more. He expects you to take a moment to think about it, but you don’t.
“Your eyes,” you blurt out, regret evident on your face before your lips can even close. Levi studies the blood as it rushes to your cheeks, his chest filling up with an excitement that he’s through ignoring. As you clear your throat, he grips the edge of the desk a little tighter. His knuckles are white. Your eyes dart back and forth as you compose yourself. “I suppose your success probably plays a part,” you add, your voice fake and steady. Your eyes are trained on his, unmoving, as if you’re trying to prove he doesn’t scare you. He likes a challenge.
Levi bites the tip of his tongue before he speaks, as if savoring the taste of the question before it’s gone. “And what is it about me that you find so attractive?” he asks, leaning towards you instinctively. As he watches your lips part and your jaw relax out of shock, he can’t help but smirk. He decides that you’re very pretty when you’re flustered. You start stammering, your voice high-pitched and strained rather than the cool and collected tone you pushed before, but Levi waits patiently — the answer to this one has mystified him as of late. He frowns when your eyes shoot to the ground.
He had thought before that he would hesitate before touching you when he’d decided his agenda a moment ago; however, when Levi is faced with the frustration of not being able to see the movements of every little muscle in your face, he becomes impatient. He needs to be able to decipher you. Before a second can pass, he’s reaching out to you, putting one finger on the soft skin under your jaw and lifting your head until your eyes lock. His throat threatens to close, but his voice persists. “It’s rude not to look people in the eyes when you’re speaking to them,” Levi says, and it’s all he can muster. He savors that bewildered look in your eyes for only a second before standing.
The room has risen at least fifty degrees in temperature, and as he decides how he intends to compose himself, the black suit jacket that’s smothering him must absolutely come off. As the coarse fabric passes his fingertips, he’s confident enough to meet your gaze again. When he sees that you’re at least twice as anxious as he is, Levi relaxes just a bit. “Do me a favor and swap with me,” he says, watching intently as you shift in your seat, rubbing your thighs together — which he’s sure you think is inconspicuous. “Sit on the desk.” As he motions towards the spot he sat in a moment before with his head, folding his jacket, his memory flashes back to looking up at you some time ago from the waiting room sofa. The temperature rises again.
To his pleasant surprise, you obey immediately. The chair creaks as you rise from it, settling as you inch to the desk only a yard away and spin on your heel. You tuck your skirt underneath you once again as you sit back down. Although Levi has tried to ignore it, the relentless tightness in the crotch of his pants is starting to bother him.
An obnoxious creak rings through the room as he pulls the armchair closer to you, but you don’t seem to notice it. The difference between your demeanor now and the nervous-yet-brash attitude he typically has the pleasure of accompanying is astounding; it’s hard to look anywhere but just in front of him as you fidget in place, pupils blown wide and lips open wider. When Levi is satisfied with the distance between his hands and your body, he takes a seat.
Something like fire runs through his veins when your chin dips down so you can look him in the eye. It’s clear you’ve been eager to prove yourself wrong since your slip a few minutes ago — and Levi can’t help but be impressed by it. He watches your hands as they grip the desk a little tighter, just like he did in the same position. Then, centimeter by centimeter, his gaze trails down to the hem of your skirt. “I like this better,” he says, trying his best to pull his eyes back up to your face, but failing as your knees trail further apart with every word that comes off of his tongue.
Levi thinks of your handsy chaperone just outside, and a bit of anger shoots through him. Before he can even process that, however, it’s already turned to something darker. The newly formed vendetta the lust-hazed man has against your “boyfriend” is not at all justifiable, but that doesn’t make it any less real. If he were to truly have his way — meaning, if he were a much worse person and didn’t care so deeply about your image of him — you’d let him have you against the door, and Levi would be sure to make it rattle as loudly as he possibly could. He might even turn the handle on “accident” and let the door creak open a bit just to be sure your ride-along gets the fucking message.
Then, Levi reminds himself that he is an adult, and that you’re practically squirming in front of him as he takes the time to think this. It’s hardly noticeable, but your shoulders rattle just a bit when you breathe. He loves what he does to you. “That was awkward outside. You’re not nearly as into him as he is you,” he comments after a moment of tense silence. You suck in a sharp breath — a mistake, on your part, because it sends a little jolt of anger through him. Why are you so nervous about Reiner?
He calms a bit as you shake your head, as if in apology. “He’s nice, you know, it’s just not exciting. I don’t feel much of anything,” you say, guilt laced in your voice. He can’t hold back the snicker that escapes his lips as things click into place for him; of course you aren’t a fan of the nice guy — a college-age girl lusting after someone who’s notoriously abrasive and fifteen years older than her usually wouldn’t be.
You look puzzled, so Levi chooses to let you in on the joke. “You don’t seem like the type of girl to like the ones that treat you well. It must be daddy issues or something.” He smiles to himself as you let out a huff; you’re very entertaining when he can manage to piss you off, which is often enough. “I asked if I could touch you before; is the answer still yes? It’s okay if it isn’t.” Levi fixes his gaze on you to gauge how you react — he’d never want you to feel pressured — but he quickly learns that he doesn’t need to.
You take a shuddering breath and practically whisper, “Yes, please,” and it’s all he can do not to push you back against the desk and lift that pretty skirt out of his way. But still, he resists. Today, Levi wants to make a point. What he really wants — which is to pin you down and fuck you until he’s satisfied enough not to think about it all the goddamn time — will have to wait for the next meeting. He’s not worried about the consequences at the moment. Lust might be clouding his judgment, but he figures everything is aired out now. May as well follow through.
You look utterly desperate, and Levi doesn’t think he’s ever seen you look more darling. The word “please” lights a little fire in him; if he’d known all it took for your respect was insinuating he wanted to fuck you, he would’ve started being honest a long time ago. He hums in approval. “Good manners.” This is all it takes to brighten your eyes and perk up your timid frame, and Levi feels himself get harder at the sight of it. He hopes you’re always this desperate to please him — it’s his favorite expression on your angelic face.
He lays his hands on your legs, fingers slipping just past the hem of your skirt; his thumbs comb left and right over the soft skin of your inner thighs, little threads of electricity linking all the way through his veins. Levi nearly joins you as you shiver beneath him, but he stays collected. As beautiful and enticing as you may be, he still has a career to attend to. This meeting is unfortunately crucial to more than one of the writer’s current goals.
“The rest was an improvement, so I didn’t mention it last week, but I feel like some of your more passionate moments fall flat. You get too excited for the end and rush through the most engaging parts,” he tells you, his mouth starting to water as he feels the heat radiating just an inch further up your thighs. The statement is rooted in truth, but it’s also a reasonable explanation for what he’s preparing to do to you. Levi is a prudent believer in killing as many birds as possible with one stone.
The skin is softer the higher his fingertips explore, but you’re beginning to grow impatient. You shift down on the edge of the desk, desperate for his touch just two inches further. He allows one corner of his mouth to turn up as he indulges in your desperation. “How — How can I fix it for next time?” you breathe, and he instinctively pushes right up to the lace of your panties. After all, Levi is just as desperate as you are. A sweet, greedy whine rings from your throat as his fingers brush by, and it’s music to his ears.
He wants to frown as you squeeze your lips together to silence yourself, but he lets it slide. Besides, he’ll have you making prettier sounds in a moment. “I was hoping you’d give me permission to show you. I thought you might want to try something a bit more hands-on,” he replies smoothly. Levi waits for your approval, although he already knows the answer, and you nod eagerly. He can’t help but grip your thighs tighter when he sees your pleading eyes. You’re behaving uncharacteristically well today.
Soft lace brushes against his thumb as he runs it along the edge of your panties, and you inhale sharply. Looking up at you again, you’re practically drooling, with your mouth hanging open and your eyes brimming with lust — and he’s never been so bewitched. Levi thinks for a moment that if sirens and mermaids had your lilting voice and enchanting face, he could finally understand all the dead sailors of literature. He’d take a lifeboat out in a hurricane if it meant you’d need him like this again.
He pulls one hand from the warmth underneath your skirt and reaches up to cup your chin, pulling you closer. As your face creeps forward, he can’t help but stare at your lips. “Are you afraid?” Levi asks, fighting the urge to bring his hand up just an inch and push his thumb into your mouth. This time would be about you.
“Yes,” you reply, trying to let yourself down on his hand inconspicuously once again as he grins up at you. Levi thinks you might get more out of being intimidated than he does out of intimidating you, and he adores it. He grazes his fingertips along your soft cheek as he reaches to tuck a strand of hair behind your ear.
Returning to your thighs, he isn’t reserved about touching you any longer. The bottom of your panties is now damp to the touch as Levi tortures you gently through the fabric. A little whimper escapes your lips, sending a pulse through him, and you speak up again. “What should I learn from this?” you ask, needy eyes boring into his as you squirm against his hands.
Levi pretends to think, letting out a “Hm,” as he glances up at the ceiling. “It seems counterproductive to spell it out for you. They’ve been pushing student discovery and critical thinking in recent years, you know,” he teases you, waiting for any little distraction so he can tear off your panties and finally give you exactly what you want. When your eyes squint shut for a melodic laugh, he gets his wish. Taking the lace at your hips in each of his hands, he slides them over your smooth legs and tosses them on the desk you’re perched on.
The spotless white lace flashes through the air, but Levi can’t pull his eyes away from the dark little void underneath your skirt and just between your legs. Pushing the swath of fabric up to your stomach is the only thing on his intensely focused mind, but he doesn’t want you to be satiated yet. Cat and mouse is his favorite game.
“White. What an ironic choice,” Levi jokes, feeling your body shudder with every shallow breath. “It represents innocence, you know. Purity.” For the first time, he really touches you — he drags his finger along the inside of your thigh and then right down your slit, and it pulls him in no matter how much he tries to resist it. The desk creaks as you shift, and Levi can feel what you’re doing before he sees it: one of your hands entangles in the hair on the back of his head, shooting a tingle down to the tips of his toes, and you nudge him closer. You want his mouth on you as badly as he wants to taste you.
The dainty fingers pressing at his scalp can stay for now, but Levi surely doesn’t intend to let you push him around like this — as desperately as he wants to oblige. “And look at you,” he taunts, eyes flashing up to catch yours. “One touch and you’re pathetic.” It’s clear you’re becoming impatient as you tug at him again, more sternly this time, traces of quiet, needy whines and whimpers littering from your plush lips. Poor thing — you can’t possibly be the one in charge when you’re like this. Levi takes a bit of the sensitive skin on the inside of your thigh and pinches it, just hard enough to get your attention.
A high pitched yelp escapes your mouth and your hand falls back at your side, satisfying him for now. You pout at him, but he just glares back, giving you a tsk. “Don’t get ahead of yourself,” Levi warns, ”I’ll make you wait longer.” He’s not sure if he can follow through on this threat, but he won’t need to. Seeing the sincerity in your eyes when you nod back at him, he knows you’re putty in his hands.
That expression is all it takes to break him. He takes the hem of your skirt and pushes it up over your pelvis, sliding his hands further upward to grab onto your hips. As he stands, your bodies parallel and only an inch apart, he adjusts you to sit just a bit further back. As deeply as Levi wants to look down at your now-exposed cunt, he’s locked on your eyes. Your smooth skin erupts in goosebumps underneath him as he draws circles on your lower back with his fingertips, fighting the ferocious urge to attach his lips onto yours. “Do you know my first name?“ he murmurs lowly, each of your shallow breaths on his face sending a shiver down his spine. The tip of your nose brushes against the tip of his as you nod, and he thinks he might faint. “Tell it to me,” he begs.
He relishes in your shallow gasp before you oblige him. “Levi,” you say, near a moan. He has to hold in one of his own as the sound rings through his ears, disguising it as an approving hum. Prying one hand from its position on your lower back, he reaches up to pat your cheek twice.
“Good girl,” he coos, before finally dropping to his knees. The coarse carpet scratches through the fabric of Levi’s slacks, like tiny needles poking at his knees, but he puts it aside. The sweet scent drifting to his nose and the lovely sight just a few inches in front of him are enough to cure any ailment. Every millimeter of your deprived skin shudders beneath his touch as he trails up your thighs, stopping at the deep creases at the tip top of each of your legs. He aches to go further, but he stops himself.
“What do you want, sweetheart? Beg me for it.” He licks his dry lips before blowing a thin stream of cold air over your exposed clit, feeling your body squirm and tremble beneath his touch. Levi almost smiles.
“Touch me,” you breathe out, and he loves it — but you don’t get to make demands today. He pinches your thigh again, drawing another yelp from your open lips. Your legs close reflexively, forcing his hands out and pinching his eyebrows together. There isn’t any resistance when Levi knocks them apart again, so he pushes your knees a few inches further than they were before, giving you a little tut.
“Don’t whisper,” Levi demands. “Speak in complete sentences.” His impatience becomes overwhelming when he sees the insides of your thighs glistening as they spread, wanting nothing more than to find out how it tastes.
“I want you to touch me,” you admit. “Please, Levi. I can’t wait anymore.”
Instead of pausing to consider that he’s going straight to hell for this — as he probably should — Dr. Ackerman just relinquishes all control to the far less respectable character he’s displayed so blatantly in recent weeks. If the spiteful, lustful man on his knees in front of you had ever bothered to fear God, he’s suddenly very sure he’d be damned anyway. So he just dives into you, unhesitant, wrapping his arms tight around your thighs and pressing his fingers into your lower back. He feels your skin move under his nails as your spine arches, and your stomach presses against the top of his head.
The taste overwhelms him, distinctly saccharine with a citrus-like tang as he dances circles around your swollen clit with the tip of his tongue. The fervent moan that erupts from your lips is so heavenly that Levi is sure he’s dreaming it. He expects more to follow as he laps expertly at the oasis beneath him, a low growl gathering in his chest, but you soullessly mute yourself after that. Stubbornness overtakes him as the knots in his stomach tense at the loss of your sweet voice, sending his face to burrow deeper and his tongue to swirl more deliberately in an effort to draw out another.
Unhinging the desperate grip he holds on the small of your back, he traces a measured circle around your slick, neglected entrance with one finger, relishing in your indigent shiver. Although he’s reluctant to lose the taste, Levi releases your clit from his mouth and directs his attention to your alluring gaze as a muffled whimper sounds behind your hand — which is clamped stiffly over your mouth in an effort to deprive the starving beggar beneath you of the only thing that can satisfy him. Swift as to avoid any protests, he plucks your hand away by your wrist and sets it dismissively back on the desk. “I want to hear you,” he says ardently, unmoving in his conviction.
Your eyes go wide, signaling some imminent danger to which Levi must be oblivious. His mind is clouded under somewhat of a frenzy as your taste soaks between his lips to endlessly land fresh on his tongue. “But I — He’s —” you try to argue, your anxiously roaming eyes falling on his mouth far too often to be inconspicuous. He hopes that you kiss him, but you speak again instead. “Levi, please,” you beg, doe-like eyes boring into the great oak door at his back. In an instant, it clicks: he realizes that you don’t want your boyfriend to hear you.
Levi licks his glistening lips, looking you up and down as you cower under his desirous glare. He jerks his head to the beige wall that divides his office, feeling a grin tug one corner of his mouth up in anticipation. “Go put your hands against that wall,” he orders, sizing up your reaction with glossy, insatiable eyes. Your head shakes immediately, but he can see your thighs rub together in search of friction. He narrows his stare. “What’s that you said yesterday? ‘I can’t speak to you that way?’ Where’s that brave girl now?” Levi taunts, rising from his seat and stepping back to give you room. “Go, brat. Don’t act innocent now.”
You obey, affirming once again that you’re willing to do anything he asks. His stiff, swollen cock threatens at the zipper of his pants, but he contains himself a little longer. Watching you prance across the office as your skirt flounces behind you is enough to unnerve him, but seeing your dainty, slender fingers spread when your palms lay flat on the wall almost takes him out. Levi’s shameless eyes focus blatantly on your ass as it invites his belt buckle to rest against it.
One of your straying strands of hair tickles his nose after a few long strides across the room, and he no longer has the patience to make you wait. A whimper sounds from your obscured mouth as he kisses your neck and grinds against your near-exposed ass, taking your untouched breasts in his hands and kneading them gently. Your ear lands flush against the wall as Levi pins you against it with his torso, and you moan despite the obvious reminder of your gentleman caller. “What’s wrong?” he teases in your ear, feeling you tense beneath his embrace. You’ve been awfully quiet today. “Say it out loud,” he enforces.
Dr. Ackerman explores you after weeks of holding himself back, rolling his hips against you assertively and taking your stiff nipples between his fingers over your soft sweater. “My boyfriend is right outside,” you breathe, letting an unabashed whine sing from your throat as you grind back against him, shaking your ass against the already-engorged bulge in his slacks.
A laugh bubbles from Levi’s mouth. “And I’m right here. Which one are you begging to fuck you right now? Is it him?” You don’t say anything for a long moment, bringing a scowl to his face. He reluctantly lets go of one of your supple breasts and instead smacks your ass, biting scarcely at your neck as a little sting branches through his palm. You yelp. “Answer me when I speak to you,” he orders.
“No.” you reply swiftly. “It’s you, Levi.” The sound of his first name set in your beautiful voice fills him with a warmth he can’t describe as a rare, wide smile flashes into your neck. With that, he sinks to his knees, burying his face between your cheeks and tasting you on his tongue once again. Levi has finally defeated all of his inhibitions as he licks hungrily at your folds, moaning along with you as you finally let loose. He sucks harshly at your clit as he plunges two fingers into your dripping pussy, thrusting them to the rhythm of his name pouring from your lips. “Levi, Levi, Levi,” you repeat, rocking yourself back against his fingers pathetically.
The addition of a third finger and a slight curve at the knuckle brings about an unbearably arousing squeal as he thumps against your g-spot, never relenting his steady assault on the swollen nub he holds gently between his teeth. “Levi, fuck, please — I’m about to cum,” you beg, and Dr. Ackerman ceases all of his movements at once. Dick twitching at the sound of your voice, he realizes he needs to feel you throb around it when he makes you cum for the first time. His fingertips glide up your bare legs as he stands, listening to the needy whimpers you produce as you cope with the loss of contact.
The ends of your eyelashes brush at his cheeks when Levi twirls you to face him, pressing your back firmly against the wall and sliding a brave hand loosely around the base of your throat. At an approving hitch of your breath, he lets it tighten. At the left, his other hand brushes a loose strand of hair behind your ear before trailing down to hold your chin in place. He watches your eyelids flutter when he brushes his thumb over your bottom lip, desire washing over him as your mouth falls invitingly open. Wet, coarse tastebuds brush beneath his touch as your lips open wider and his thumb comes to rest on the back of your tongue, feeling it move as you gag at the invasion before adjusting. He admires your perseverance.
Static rolls over Levi’s body when you close your mouth and hollow your cheeks around the digit, your big, innocent eyes never leaving his own. As your tongue swirls around his finger, every thought in his hazy mind spirals down to tossing you to your knees and burying himself as deeply in your throat as he can manage.
He digs his thumb a little deeper, making you gag again. “You look so fucking pretty like this, baby,” he murmurs, the hand around your throat unwrapping itself to trail down your arm. “I never knew it would be so easy to get you to shut the fuck up.” Levi pulls his thumb from the warm solace of your mouth and starts at his buckle as his right hand wraps around your wrist. He spins you to face the wall before wrapping the arm around your back and holding it taut. A puzzled yelp rings in his ears as he yanks his zipper down.
His stiff, throbbing length springs straight out as he pulls the waistband of his underwear down just enough to free it; impatience overcomes any inclination toward nakedness. You gasp as the sensitive tip brushes against your clothed frame. The scents of vanilla and sex invade his senses as he presses his face into your neck, grinding himself against you until he can feel your dampness through the polyester. After a moment of this, Levi takes your other wrist and pins it roughly alongside the other.
“Tell me what you want,” he groans softly, leisurely pumping his dick with one hand and restraining your hands with the other. “Loud enough so you aren’t sure if your boyfriend can hear you or not.” Levi chuckles to himself, groping your ass roughly before returning his hand to himself. “Show me how bad you want it, desperate little brat.”
He realizes he’s broken you in nicely when your voice rings out clear and loud, your ass grinding back against his cock as you speak. It takes everything in him not to thrust into your dripping heat before you even finish your thought. “Please fuck me, daddy. Keep talking to me like this. Please,” you whine shamelessly, leaving Levi in shambles.
Having women call him something so lewd has never crossed his mind — Professor or Dr. works nicely in a pinch — but it sounds so delicious to him coming from your sweet lips. Folding your skirt up over your ass with one hand and lining himself up at your entrance with the other, Levi lets out a husky groan. His mind is cloudier than it’s ever been as the sensitive head of his dick drags through the slick juices soaking down to your inner thighs. “Fuck, call me that again, baby. ‘M gonna fuck you so good,” he mumbles into your neck.
Levi’s tight, sweet haven resists him as soon as he starts to enter you, but you shove your hips back onto his cock in retaliation. He feels like he’s found nirvana as your warm pussy grips the tip of his dick, pushing to take more. Electricity to a level he’s never experienced shoots through every vein underneath his skin as you envelope him. He quickens his pace as soon as he’s submerged enough, looping his free hand around to rub circles on your clit.
Pretty, singing moans ring out from your lips like you have no worries in the world. “So big, daddy,” you whine, throwing your ass back on his length with more conviction. “I want all of it.”
He adjusts your walls roughly around his width without waiting for them to relax completely, hungry to feel your cunt pulse as he pounds your furthest depths. A fourth of his throbbing length still remains uncovered after the third rough stroke, but the blissful string of moans ringing from your pretty throat lead him to believe that you love being stretched as much as he loves the way you squeeze his cock.
“I wonder what your boyfriend thinks you sound like right now, huh, pretty girl? Does he think you sound desperate?” he growls, tightening his hold on your restrained arms as he thrusts into you. “I think you sound like a greedy,” deeper, “fucking,” harder, “slut,” to the hilt.
Levi sees stars when it finally swallows him whole, the head of his dick battering the back-most wall of your snug pussy. His enlightened ears are full of lewd, unabashed moans as he fucks into you, rolling his hips with every stroke. The tops of your legs start to shake with his assault on your clit, your noises becoming more desperate. “I’m close,” you whine, laying your head back on his shoulder.
Your wide, beautiful eyes entrance him as Levi feels your walls pulse around his cock. “Cum for me, princess,” he coos, holding your gaze and rubbing your clit faster. “Let him hear what a good whore you are for me.” He didn’t think it was possible, but the warm, dripping mess surrounding him grows even wetter with his words.
Your cunt convulses around him as you release, sending waves of intolerable pleasure through his body. As you cry out for him, Dr. Ackerman’s eyes get even darker. Although he planned to keep a steady rhythm and let you ride out your orgasm peacefully, he picks up the pace. Dropping your arms, he spreads your asscheeks wide and digs himself a little deeper, beating so harshly against your spot that he’s sure it’s painful.
“Look at you,” Levi mocks, smacking your ass hard enough to leave a perfect red handprint. Your pussy clenches tight, and you let out an angelic sound. “You aren’t ashamed of yourself at all, are you?”
It’s difficult to discern your words between the moans, but he refuses to slow his pounding. “No, sir,” you stammer out, digging your fingernails into the wall. “I love it.”
Levi rakes his hands underneath your sweater and unclasps your bra with urgency, sliding his palms over your breasts. A pinch to both of your nipples earns a squeal before he rolls them around in his fingertips and feels you purr beneath him. “You’re behaving so well for me,” he hums, slowing his strokes gradually until they’re mind numbing. “Who do you belong to, sweet girl?”
Levi’s breath catches in his throat as you clench around his length, sending his cock a little deeper. For a moment, it crosses his mind that he loves you. Your quiet whimpers get more desperate the slower he goes. “I’m yours, daddy — fuck — Levi, please don’t stop,” you beg.
He swiftly unsheathes his dick, the loss of contact overwhelming as he turns you around to face him. Without a word, Levi loops his arms under your shamefully wet thighs and lifts you, pinning your back roughly against the wall and planting his forehead against yours. He slides into your soaking cunt like it was tailored to fit him, watching your eyes roll back into that pretty, empty head. “Let me cum in my pussy, baby,” he groans, squeezing his eyes shut as he adjusts to the intense pleasure. “Before I — ah, shit, that’s good,” he breaks off, tightening his hold on your shaking legs as your walls constrict around him and you nod eagerly in approval. “Before I send you back to your cuck fucking boyfriend,” he moans in your ear.
The knots in his stomach are wound tighter than he thought, but he keeps himself steady as he rocks into you, looking down to watch his thick, glistening cock split you open as you throw your head back in ecstasy. Levi attaches his hungry lips to your neck as he feels his orgasm approach him. A sweet sting pricks through him as ten fingernails dig into his scalp, entangling in his hair, and he lets out an animalistic moan while you release around him.
He spreads your legs a little wider, ignoring your pained whimper to touch your knees to the wall as he drills you harder, and deeper. There’s no banter left for him to spout anymore — the only thing in Levi’s mind is burying his cum in his new favorite toy.
He bites down hard on your collarbone as his thrusts start to lose their rhythm, the knots in his stomach unraveling as his dick twitches inside of you. Euphoria overcomes him as he drives his cock down to its hilt and lets his climax take him over. Levi doesn’t stifle the low, raspy moans that escape his throat as he feels his cum flood into you, his dick throbbing in time with every shallow breath. Nothing has ever felt this good.
Burying his face in your neck, Levi allows himself this long moment of peace.
#snk levi#aot#snk#snk x reader#attack on titan#levi x reader#levi ackerman#levi attack on titan#levi smut#aot smut#levi oneshot#levi aot#professor levi x reader#professor levi ackerman#levi ackerman oneshot#levi ackerman smut#levi ackerman x reader#aot oneshots#daddy k!nk#daddy levi#dom levi#choking#hatefuck#rough smut#verbal degradation#degradation kink#humiliating kink#levi ackerman reader insert#captain levi#modern au
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swipe right / f.w
Summary: Finding your best friend and your biggest crush on Tinder is always awkward. Pairing: Muggle!Fred Weasley x Muggle!Fem!Reader Warnings: Discussions of sex, language, alcohol, food/drink mention. Word Count: 6.9k (this is the longest thing i’ve ever written)
AUTHORS NOTE / hiiiii... this is my first fic in SO long but thank you for waiting for me!!! a huge thank you to my lovely rosie @spacexcowgirl for inspiring this fic and also listening to me ramble on about it for hours on end as i was writing it and for also beta reading it guys this fic rly wouldnt exist if it wasnt for rose so.........
/ also, george’s girlfriend in the fic is named ‘em’ and she has no physical description besides also using she/her pronouns. i’m trying this out so even people who aren’t (primarily) fred simps can self insert in this fic!!!
taglist / @amourtentiaa @weelittleweasley @lumos-barnes @lumosandnoxwriting @loveboyhalo @harrysweasleys @freds-slut @rcwenaclaw @barneswidow @fandomhideout
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Y/N stared at her screen, the Tinder profile of Fred Weasley staring right back at her, teasing her ominously. She eventually decides to lock her phone to avoid the familiar and unwelcomed feelings rising in her throat. The last thing she ever expected to see during her mindless swiping at 1am was her best friend’s Tinder profile.
She knows it’s hypocritical to feel this way but she’s also not stupid. She and Fred both have had their fair share of dates and hookups thanks to dating apps- they’re in the twenties and single after all. But she can’t shake how weird she feels finding Fred. Like she’s stumbled across something private.
Y/N unlocks her phone again, curiosity eventually making her cave after staring at her ceiling blankly for way too long.
‘Pros: I’m an Aries (I’ve been told that's a good thing). Cons: I’m an Aries (I’ve been told that’s a bad thing).’
It’s a short and simple bio, much like her own but she has to stifle a choked laugh. She and George’s girlfriend have said these to both the twins and she feels a sense of accomplishment that she can’t explain. Almost like Fred thinking of her while he sets up his dating profile means something.
She hesitates a moment, debating between swiping left and never thinking about Fred and dating profiles ever again and swiping right just to see what happens. Y/N’s definitely making it a bigger issue than it has to be, which is why she doesn’t realise when George’s girlfriend and her roommate suddenly appears in her doorway holding chocolate.
“Em, it’s 1am and you have work tomorrow?” She questions and the girl in the doorway shrugs, making her way into the room and sitting down without an invitation.
“I can vaguely hear you monologuing next door,” she laughs as she breaks a line of chocolate off the bar and hands it to Y/N. She groans, in her moment of panic she completely forgot about the fact it’s late and their bedroom walls are paper-thin. “All I heard was something about Fred and the word fuck. I hope I’m not interrupting anything…” she winks and Y/N cringes, Em’s usual 15-year-old boy humour shining through as she pops the piece of chocolate in her mouth.
“You’re hilarious,” Y/N says rolling her eyes but she can’t deny the fondness that’s there for her best friend. “No, you’re not interrupting anything, rather the opposite actually, look.” She passes her unlocked phone to Em and Y/N wishes she could have captured the shocked look on Em's face.
“Fred has a fucking active Tinder?” She’s quickly swiping through his profile and she hates to admit he has good pictures, but when she gets to his bio she snorts and rolls her eyes. “That’s something you say, Y/N.”
Y/N feels her face go red at Em’s comment. She’s acknowledged this already but when someone else says it she feels like she isn’t being as far fetched as she’s convinced herself. While she outright refuses to acknowledge her feelings for Fred to anyone who isn’t herself, she knows Em knows without having to tell her. Call it best friend instinct, ‘dating-his-twin-brother’ instinct, whatever she pleases, which is why when there’s a mischievous glint in Em’s eyes, Y/N immediately is reaching for her phone. “No.”
Em whines, rolling onto her back. “Why not, you’re so boring!”
“I am not swiping right on Frederick fucking Weasley.” She feels her face becoming warmer as she says it. Em gives her a look as if to say ‘I believe you’ with a glint in her eye that makes Y/N know she doesn’t. “I’m just never going to open the app again!”
Em rolls her eyes but the fond smile on her face is unmistakable. “And do what, love?”
Y/N falters for a second before shrugging. “Not perceive his profile. It’ll be gone into the abyss of people who live in London and I’ll never think about it again.” She’s smiling, thinking she’s concocted the most perfect plan.
-----
It wasn’t the most perfect plan, for when Y/N is hanging out with Fred two days later she’s faced yet again with the ‘Tinder Predicament’ as dubbed by Em. Fred and Y/N are sitting in their favourite park, the new spring weather of London on their skin as they soak up the friendly sun rays after a harsh winter. Y/N is laying on her stomach, the book open but she’s barely reading as she pretends to listen to Fred ramble on about only God knows what.
It’s 11am, not too early for the park to be empty but busy enough that other people are turning up, mostly couples. Y/N tunes Fred out, quickly getting lost in her own thoughts. Do other people think we’re a couple? she thinks to herself. She knows if Em could read her mind she’d say yes and Y/N is quick to push the thought out of her mind.
Everything is interrupted when her phone lights up with a ‘You’ve got a new match!’ notification and before she can hide it from prying eyes, Fred’s wolf-whistling.
“You’ve got dating apps, do ya, Y/L/N?” he teases and Y/N wants the Earth to swallow her up, she can’t think of a worse situation to be in.
“Yeah, don’t you?” The second the words leave her mouth she regrets them. Fred’s smirking at her, a signature smirk of his he only does when she knows he’s up to something. Unfortunately for her, she is on the receiving end of that something.
“Something along the lines of ‘looking for a golden retriever boy?’. Ring any bells, darling?” Y/N feels her blood drain from her body and Fred releases a laugh that can only be described as a full-body chortle. “You know I have one, darling. Besides, you popped up last night. I already knew.”
Y/N groans. This shouldn’t be as embarrassing as it feels but it’s Fred and knowing Fred has seen her dating profile was low on her wishes for this week, or for her entire life for that matter.
“Did you at least swipe right on me?”
It’s said with a teasing manner, falling right out of Y/N’s mouth before she can stop it. Her curiosity always gets the best of her and she wants to kick herself for it. But she doesn’t even notice Fred’s slight falter, the red tint kissing his cheeks and emphasising the freckles across his face at the comment. “You’ll have to swipe right on me to find out.”
She can’t tell if he’s joking. But Fred is always joking. So she laughs and pushes him slightly, “If I come across your Tinder profile, I’m reporting it.”
“It would be a blessing from the universe for you to come across my dating profile. I’m sure you’d appreciate my bio.”
“Let me guess. ‘6’3 if it matters’?” Fred scowls looking down at her and she knows she looks way too proud for that comment but she doesn’t care and after a few seconds, Fred doesn’t care either. He starts to feel a small shred of jealousy from knowing Y/N has a Tinder profile, but he swallows it, tabling it for later when he isn’t with her.
“Why do you have the app?” He blurts out, annoyed at himself for letting it slip out. “Just… Curious, y’know?” He adds on when he notices Y/N looking up at him with an eyebrow raised. He doesn’t really want to know, but the words are out there and the cute scrunch of Y/N’s nose as she thinks of an answer almost makes it worth it.
“Male validation, mostly,” she laughs awkwardly, rubbing the back of her neck when she hears Fred laugh along with her. “I don’t know, Freddie.” She says, exasperatedly. “I barely use it. What about you?”
“Sex, if I’m honest.” Now it’s his turn to awkwardly laugh because he knows he answered that way too quickly and a little too honest for his own comfort. Y/N’s been his best friend for years, probably knows him best besides George but she didn’t really need to know he uses his Tinder profile to hook up with people.
When Y/N doesn’t respond immediately, Fred takes it badly. He knows she would never judge him, not about anything and especially not this, but his thoughts get the best of him and sometimes he can’t help it. He has no idea Y/N is in her own head, jealous other girls get to hold Fred at a distance closer than she ever will.
He clears his throat and checks his phone to see no notifications besides a direct message from Lee Jordan. He knows George isn’t expecting him home- cursing his brother when he remembers George demanded the flat to himself (and in turn, also Em) today for a few hours. “Hey, uh. I’ve gotta go. Emergency with George apparently.”
He knows he shouldn’t have lied, it’s not even a good lie but it was the first thing he thought of. He notices Y/N’s eyebrows furrow before she shrugs, nodding before closing her book. “That’s okay, I was getting tired anyway. I might pop back to my flat for a nap.”
“I’ll see you later, yeah?” Fred asks and his chest feels warm when Y/N meets his face with a smile.
“Of course, Freddie.”
She watches Fred leave, her thoughts getting the best of her. She knows for a fact there is no ‘George emergency’- she knows George is with Em probably being sick and in love and she’s sure Fred knows this too. The realisation Fred made an excuse to not spend time with her hits her like a truck, her mind frantically searching for what she could’ve possibly done to upset her best friend.
“Fuck,” she whispers to herself, the second she realises.
-----
To: Em > if you come home tonight dont mind me being drunk x
Y/N sends the text as she stands in the kitchen, pouring herself her second glass of wine before it has even hit 6pm. On her way home, she stopped by the liquor store, picked up her favourite wine and decided to drink away the anxieties of upsetting Fred.
From: Em > ill be home. ill pick up chinese on the way. save me some wine!!! x
She smiles down at her phone, knowing Em would always be there without even realising it. She sits down on their couch and turns on the television- old reruns of early 2000s sitcoms playing on almost every channel.
It’s 20 minutes late when Em turns up. She’s nursing the Chinese food as if it’s a child as she tries to unlock the front door without dropping the food or her bottle of wine. She smiles proudly at Y/N the second she gets in, putting the food on the table before she grabs her own wine glass.
“What happened today?”
Y/N is caught off guard but she shouldn’t be shocked. She doesn’t usually drink and when she does, it’s very rarely without Em. “Nothing’s wrong!” she says, skulling the rest of her wine when Em gives her a knowing look.
“You were with Fred today and now you’re sad drinking. What happened?” Usually, she loves when Em is her all-knowing best friend, but right now she wishes she’d shut up.
“Nothing happened!” She’s adamant to not say too much. She knows it’s probably all in her head, that she and Fred will be fine in a few days but when Em gives her one more knowing look, she breaks. “Okay, fine. I think I upset him today.”
Em’s confused, to say the least. Fred, for as long as she has known him, has never been upset with Y/N- even on accident. She has the tall redhead wrapped around her finger. “How?” she questions, because she truly can’t think of a single thing that Y/N could do to hurt him.
Em places Y/N’s food in front of her when she starts speaking. “We were talking about Tinder- don’t give me that look he saw a notification and it came up and he asked why I had it. I said I don’t know and when I asked him, he said he uses it for sex,” Y/N says softly, pouring herself another glass of wine before continuing. “I didn’t say anything when he said that, because… Well… You know why.”
Em does know. She knew the second she became Y/N’s roommate their first year of University that she had feelings for Fred and she knew immediately Fred liked her too but Y/N’s never believed her. “You think he got upset you didn’t say anything about sex?”
“I think he thinks I was being judgemental.” Em sighs at Y/N’s response. She loves both her best friends- they’re her favourite people besides George but she knows they can be idiots. They sit in silence for a few minutes, the only sound being the forks against their Chinese containers before Em grab’s Y/N’s phone, unlocking it.
“Well if Fred’s using Tinder for sex, so should you!” she says matter-of-factly and when Y/N groans from the kitchen sink, Em speaks again. “It’s true! He likes you but won’t tell you, you like him but won’t tell anyone! Who’s a good meaningless shag going to hurt?”
That’s how they end up in Em’s bed, cuddling under the duvet with ice cream and Y/N’s Tinder profile open on her phone. “You’re so fucking picky, holy shit,” Em says when Y/N scrunches her nose up at the sixth consecutive guy. “It’s a shag, not a hand in marriage, love.”
“They don’t do it for me!” Y/N is avoiding the elephant in the room- that she’s comparing every guy that pops up to Fred. “I have to be attracted to them for this meaningless shag you’re preaching about… See, he’s cute!” His name’s Cormac, he’s 21 so only a few years younger than Y/N and he’s not bad looking.
“He looks like a douchebag!” Em exclaims and Y/N groans.
“You told me to stop being picky!”
“Stop being picky doesn’t mean saying yes to the first conventionally attractive guy we see!” Em exclaims as she swipes left on poor Cormac. Y/N gets up to pour herself and Em one more glass of wine each and she hears Em starting giggling to herself when the new profile shows up, hiding the phone from Y/N’s eyes when she walks over. Without even questioning Y/N, Em swipes right and immediately she starts howling laughing.
‘New Match!’ the screen reads and Y/N feels her breath hitch when snatches the phone from Em’s hands and she sees who she matched with.
Fred, 24. 2km away.
“I remembered after dinner, you said he told you to swipe right to see what he did,” Em says proudly, and Y/N regrets even mentioning it to Em offhandedly. Y/N’s eyes are transfixed on the tiny screen. There’s no way he seriously swiped right, she’s sure it’s only a joke- people jokingly match with their friends all the time. “So here you go, Freddie swiped right on my lil Y/N/N.”
Y/N shakes her head at this. “I’m sure he only did it as a joke. People do that when they find their friends on Tinder all the time!” she says, sitting back down on the bed and cuddling up next to Em. “You were telling me to swipe right on him last night, after all.”
Em looks at Y/N and sighs, clearly sensing how uncomfortable Y/N is feeling right now from the confrontation of her feelings for Fred. “I was telling you to swipe right because I know you’re in love with him,” she says softly, not missing the way Y/N’s eyes soften at the mention of her feelings for Fred. “I’m sorry if I’d known-”
“Don’t apologise! I’m just going to ignore the fact we matched,” she says softly, unlocking her phone and immediately exiting from Fred’s profile. The tension from a few moments ago quickly dissipates as Y/N receives another match, this time from a boy named Neville who Y/N knows is friends with Fred’s little brother.
“When did you swipe on Nev?” Em asks and Y/N shrugs. She knows she probably did it to be funny, like what she thinks Fred’s done to her, but the more she thinks about it, Neville isn’t a bad match. He’s nice, friendly and now he’s in his twenties, he isn’t bad looking either.
“Nev’s sweet. If he asked me out I’d say yes.” She says. She isn’t lying- there’s been times she’s considered going on dates to avoid her feelings for Fred, to get over him once and for all but whenever it gets to that point, she chickens out. “I know you want a meaningless shag, but I think maybe a date would be a good idea. You know?”
Em nods, pulling Y/N closer to cuddle her and suddenly feeling bad about preaching for meaningless sex. “Maybe you’re more of a date before shagging kind of girl, and that’s okay.”
“Yeah, maybe.”
-----
Em’s fast asleep and Y/N’s overthinking next to her when she gets a message from a match. Y/N rolls her eyes when she sees the time reads 2am; knowing whoever's messaging at this time is just looking for a booty call but she opens the notification nonetheless.
From: Fred > i can be a golden retriever boy :)
She smiles at the message, Fred’s presence always does that to her. She never expected him to message her on tinder considering she’s convinced it was just a joke swipe right, but this is probably just a joking message too. She checks his bio is still the same Aries joke before quickly replying.
To: Fred > good thing im a big aries fan then ;) > how tall are you though? im sure youre well aware it matters
She hopes Fred laughs at her messages because making Fred laugh is her favourite pastime. The three dots signalling Fred’s typing pops up and her heart starts to race.
From: Fred
> im 7’5 if its that important :/
She giggles and when doesn’t know how to reply after that, she exits out of their messages, but it’s not like she has to keep a conversation with Fred going. She’s trying to think of a funny message to send Fred when she gets another message; this time from Neville.
From: Neville > hi Y/N! i hope this isnt a weird time to message you, i just finished grading some work. i was wondering if you’d like to get dinner sometime this week? we were kind of friends at school, after all, and it’ll be nice to catch up :)
The message from Neville is sweet, and she almost feels guilty reading it. Attached is his number and everything and Y/N feels her throat closing up. She would feel terrible going on a date with Neville despite what she claimed earlier, knowing her heart currently belongs to Fred.
But Fred’s lack of interest in her is eating at her as much as her own feelings for him do, and she knows she deserves better than to sit around and wait for him any longer. If Em was awake the date would already be confirmed, she knows that much so she decides to say yes to Neville, to at least put herself out there. She can imagine the little Devil version of Em dancing on her shoulder as she begins to type out a reply to Neville.
She doesn’t even think to look at who it’s being sent to before clicking send. But by then it’s too late- she doesn’t even know how she ended up back in Fred’s messages but now she wants to roll up into a ball and die.
To: Fred > hi neville! id love to grab dinner one day, here’s my number and we can organise it tomorrow because im going to bed now! x
She’s staring at the message for so long she doesn’t even notice the ‘???’ she gets back from Fred. She quickly copies and pastes the message to the right recipient this time before plugging in her phone and rolling over to sleep.
Em’s slight snoring lulls her to sleep, thoughts of Fred filling her mind before she passes out for the night. What she doesn’t know is that while she falls asleep, Fred lays awake, staring at his ceiling. Contemplating the knowledge he has knowing Y/N’s potentially organising a date with one of his little brother’s best friends.
-----
Fred hates this feeling; this feeling of jealousy in his stomach that’s threatening to spill out of his throat. He hasn't been able to stop thinking about Y/N accidentally messaging him about a date with another person all morning and he knows George is getting annoyed with him.
“Why are you being such a prat this morning?” George had asked when Fred scowled at his brother for simply standing in the kitchen. Fred had huffed as a reply, grabbing the milk for his tea before sitting down at their table to munch on his toast.
“Not being a prat,” he says, words muffled by the food in his mouth and George gives him a disgusted look before taking a bite of his own toast. “Do you remember Neville Longbottom?”
George nods, of course, he knows Neville. “Ron’s friend? Super nice bloke. Think him and Hannah Abbott just broke up, why?”
Fred shrugs, he’s almost positive it’s the same Neville now. “Think Y/N’s going on a date with him, that’s all.” When George raises his eyebrows, Fred speaks again, “Just wanted to make sure she wasn’t going on a date with a prat.”
“Wanted to know who she is going on a date with in general, more like it,” George mutters under his breath. He knows Fred better than he knows anybody, better than he knows his girlfriend and almost better than he knows himself. “You sure you’re not jealous?”
Fred squints at George. “Why would I be jealous?” Fred stands and makes his way to the kitchen to wash up his dishes and he almost drops them in the sink when George speaks again.
“Because you’re in love with Y/N?” He says it so casually Fred almost chokes on air. He’s never thought about himself and Y/N in that way. Sure they like to cuddle when they’re drunk and they spend every waking moment together but he’s not in love with Y/N.
Is he?
“What makes you say that?” Fred asks quietly, hoping to hide the red blush forming on his cheeks. George might be his best friend and twin brother but he knows he would never live it down admitting he has feelings for Y/N.
“You two are worse than Em and I, and we’re actually dating,” George speaks as if it’s the most obvious thing in the world. “When Em first met Y/N, she asked how long you and she had been together for, mate.”
“That doesn’t mean anything,” Fred says a little too quickly.
“I’m sure it doesn’t, Freddie,” George smirks as he speaks, getting up to wash his dishes now. Fred stands in the kitchen, nursing his cup of tea as he contemplates George’s words. Sure, he always knew he had some kind of feelings for his best friend, but being in love was another whole ordeal. It means wanting long term commitment, probably a house together, maybe marriage, perhaps kids if Y/N wanted them and the longer Fred sits with these in his mind, he quickly realises he does want all that and even more with Y/N. He’s probably wanted it with her for a while and he just hasn’t ever realised.
“Fuck,” he mumbles, low enough for George not to hear but when Fred doesn’t have a rebuttal to George’s words he knows he’s accidentally sent Fred into an existential crisis.
“Look, Fred. If Y/N going on a date bothers you, you need to tell her.” George knows he’s about to cross some lines that he promised himself he would never cross but it’s getting dire in his eyes. “Y/N likes you and deep down you know you like her too, even if you’re oblivious. She deserves to know and if you’re too much of a chicken to admit it to her, then you don’t get to be bothered about her going on a date with Neville Longbottom.”
Fred huffs. He knows George is right, but he can’t help but feel like he truly noticed too late. He swiped right on her on Tinder hoping she would swipe right back and they could go from there. But he knows Y/N only swiped right to see if he had done it first, that she only swiped right out of curiosity and right now, Fred is cursing the app under his breath.
“Well, fine, yes I like Y/N, but I can’t just stop her from going on a date. That’s controlling and mean.” Fred states and George just sighs. “I’ll talk to her after her date, if it’s meant to be, it’ll be.”
George stares at him. “Since when are you mister Que sera, sera, Freddie?” Fred shrugs, not understanding the reference George made. “Since when are you just letting it happen?” George translates when he notices the blank stare on Fred’s face.
“Since right now. I don’t want to come off controlling to Y/N.” Fred says. In actuality, even though he knows George would never lie to him, he’s scared. Y/N is his best friend and the last thing he ever wants to do is ruin his closest friendship all because of some jealousy.
“Okay fine, but if she gets a boyfriend, I’m sorry mate,” George says and he knows putting the threat of losing Y/N romantically on the line is harsh, but it’s what he has to do. He’s watched the pair pine for each other for years and he’s sure this is the last straw.
“We’re going out with the lads in a few days, by the way! Maybe you can stop moping enough for a shag!” George calls out and Fred flips him the finger as he walks off to his bedroom.
-----
Y/N and Neville decide on getting dinner together three days later. It’s a Friday so neither of them has to worry about work or coursework the next day, which is perfect. Neville tells Y/N about his favourite Italian restaurant right near Old Street subway station in Shoreditch, so that’s where the pair decide to meet.
It’s rather busy when Y/N gets to the station. Neville has apologised profusely for still being fifteen minutes away but she reassures him it’s fine and that she’ll meet him outside the station so they can walk to the restaurant together.
Y/N’s on her phone, texting Em and telling her she’s safe when she feels a presence next to her. She tenses up quickly but she soon relaxes when she looks at the person next to her and realises it’s Fred.
“Hi,” she says, smiling. She hasn’t seen him since the day in the park, but they’ve texted and called so she’s sure everything is fine. “What are you doing all the way on this side of London?”
Fred smiles and shoves his hands in his jeans pocket before replying, “Grabbing a drink with the lads tonight, love. What about you?” His tone is casual and Y/N has to stop herself from checking him out. He’s dressed in a nice dress shirt, it’s orange and on anyone else, it would clash with his hair but Fred somehow manages to pull it off. He’s got a black jacket over the top of his shirt, alongside black jeans that show off his long and muscular legs on and his outfit is paired off with a pair of boots on his feet.
He’s not making it easy to get over him, that’s for sure.
“I’ve got a date,” she’s shy when she says it, looking away from Fred and then back down at her phone. The time reads 6:47pm and Neville’s train will be getting in any second now. She’s trying to get over Fred and the last thing she needs is Fred lingering when said date turns up.
“Ah yes, with Neville, if I remember correctly,” Fred’s teasing and Y/N has to force a laugh out. She blocked out the fact she’d accidentally messaged him instead of Neville and was hoping he would forget as well. But this is Fred she was talking about, and Fred never lets up a chance to tease Y/N for something.
“Yeah, Neville Longbottom,” she says and she catches the look of recognition that flashes across Fred’s face. “He was friends with your brother in school.”
Fred nods in acknowledgement while he can’t decide whether or not he’s happy with the confirmation that he was right. He’s sad and jealous, that much is obvious, but he’s a little happy. Happy that even though Y/N is going on a date with someone who isn’t himself, it’s someone he knows would treat her like she deserves.
“Neville’s a good guy, I’m happy for you,” he forces out and Y/N smiles up at Fred and he wants to sink into the Earth. The smile on her face is one he wants to be the cause for forever. “I should get going, tell Nev hello for me!”
He pulls Y/N into a quick hug, presses a quick kiss absentmindedly on the top of her head before letting her go and crossing the street and making his way to the bar he’s meeting Lee, George, Harry and Ron at.
Y/N watches him leave, dumbfounded. The kiss on the top of her head is nothing less than usual; Fred’s always been touchy with her but now it feels weird. All she wants is to call out to Fred and demand the redhead take her on a date instead.
But before Y/N can do anything drastic, she hears Neville call out her name and she turns around quickly. He’s just as sweet and cute as she remembers and even if she wishes Fred was the boy she was on a date with, Neville is someone she would be friends with above anything.
“I hope you weren’t waiting too long!” He says when he reaches her, kissing her cheek as Y/N pulls him into a hug. His presence is comforting and he smells like cinnamon and Y/N feels herself instantly relax.
“Not too long!” She replies as she begins walking towards the restaurant with Neville. During Spring, the cold weather still returns at night so their hands are shoved inside their jacket pockets to keep warm but they’re walking closely together. “I ran into Fred just before, so he kept me company.”
“Good, I’m glad,” Neville says as he grabs the door to the restaurant, “can’t have a pretty girl waiting outside a subway station alone.” Y/N feels her cheeks heat up at his comment.
They’re quickly seated and wine is ordered. They’ve been placed in a booth right near the window, where they’re able to watch the City of London go by. “How’s teaching going?” Y/N asks when she remembers Neville recently graduated and got an immediate job offer at the Agriculture department at a college in Surrey.
“It’s going well! I specifically teach the floriculture courses so I love it, of course,” Neville’s smile couldn’t get any wider. Y/N specifically remembers his constant fascination with plants and flowers in school and she couldn’t be happier for him to be doing what he so clearly loves, “What about you?”
“Being hammered by my postgrad coursework,” she says, laughing and taking a sip of her wine. “My job at the bookstore near my flat doesn’t suck but I definitely don’t work as much as I used to, unfortunately.” Neville raises his glass, almost to say I’ll drink to that when the waiter comes over to take their order.
Dinner goes quickly, conversation flows easily between the two and soon enough the bill arrives and Neville grabs the cheque before Y/N can even say anything. “You can grab it next time.”
Y/N falters at this. She knows she should say something to Neville; that this has been nice but there won’t be a second date. She’s too caught up in her panic and she’s beginning to curse Fred Weasley under her breath when Neville gently places his hand on the small of her back to lead her out of the restaurant.
“Are you okay?” Neville asks when they get outside. He noticed the tensed look on Y/N’s face the second they got outside and when she nods and sighs he takes it as a sign to stop walking.
“This has been nice, Nev,” she starts and she feels terrible even though she knows it’s better, to be honest. “But I don’t think I’m-”
“Ready for a relationship?” Neville finishes for her, and he’s not condescending when he says it. He could tell even before dinner was finished that she probably felt that way and he doesn’t mind. “I don’t think I am either. But this was fun, was it not?”
Y/N nods, smiling as the anxieties of hurting Neville wash away. “It was fun!” she says, “I hope we can do it again. Even as friends?”
He nods back, a warm smile gracing his cheeks. “Of course.”
They walk back to the station together, promises of seeing each other again soon leaves their mouths as they walk to their respective platforms.
From: Neville > thanks for tonight. i forgot to mention, please tell me when you’re home safe!
She smiles down at the text, shooting Neville a reply of reassurance that she will before opening her messages with Em to let her know she’s on her way home. She’s jumping through her apps, Snapchat that she only uses for filters, Facebook she only uses to check the ‘Dogspotting’ group until she lands on Instagram.
She sees a story from George and when she opens it, she immediately regrets it. It’s their friendship group, that much she expected but she sees a girl sitting next to Fred nursing what looks like a Gin and Tonic and Y/N feels sick.
She immediately closes the app, pretending she didn’t see it. She has no right to be upset over this but it plagues her thoughts for the entire subway trip home.
That’s when she decides she’s going to demand answers from Fred. She doesn’t know how, or when or if she’ll even do it without Em forcing her to, but she knows she deserves better. That she doesn’t deserve to hang on the end of every touch, every word of Fred’s in hopes he’ll hold her closer than arm's length while she desperately wants more.
-----
The next night, Fred’s laying on his couch in an uncomfortable position searching Netflix at 10pm when he hears a knock at the front door. He knows it isn’t George, or any member of his family for that matter and any normal person would ring before coming over this late at night. So when Fred gets up and looks through his peephole to ensure he’s not about to be murdered, he’s shocked to see an angry-looking Y/N.
He opens the door and she’s immediately inside, pushing past Fred’s body and when she turns around, she has the most determined look on her face he’s ever seen.
“I’m annoyed at you.” Fred’s taken aback, he tries to think back at their interaction the evening before, trying to piece together anything that would annoy Y/N but he’s coming up blank.
“What did I do?” He wearily asks and when Y/N purses her lips together and looks like she’s about to cry Fred has to resist the urge to apologise without knowing what he needs to apologise for.
“I’m annoyed at you because,” she pauses and takes a shaky breath, “I’m annoyed because I went on a date last night. I went on a date with the loveliest man I’ve ever met. And I spent the whole fucking time wishing I was on a date with you. And I’ve spent all of today debating coming over here and telling you that so I drank half of Em’s bottle of wine for some liquid courage and here I fucking am!”
That’s the last thing Fred was expecting to come out of Y/N’s mouth. “Well, that’s not-”
“I’m not finished.” She stares at Fred and he immediately shuts up.
“I’ve been in love with you for years and it’s not fair on me anymore, Freddie.” Her voice is shaking like she needs to get everything out as soon as possible. “I need to know if you feel anything for me, even in the slightest, because if I need to move on, I’m begging you to be honest with me.”
Fred feels his heartbreak at how sweet, how broken, how defeated Y/N looked standing in front of him right now. He can see the need for an honest answer swimming in Y/N’s eyes and he’s never felt braver to admit his feelings than he does right now.
“I’m an idiot,” Y/N scoffs but lets him continue, “because I didn’t realise how fucking in love with you I am until I almost lost you. I thought…” he pauses, looking for the right words and when his eyes meet Y/N’s, there’s a softness there that wasn’t there previously. “I thought what we had was normal; the cuddling, the constant need to be with each other, the constant subtle touches. But George knocked some sense into me.” Y/N lets out a breath as she laughs, of course, it was George’s doing.
“I’m in love with you, and I think I have been since we were 17. So I’m so fucking sorry, for ever letting you think you meant any less to me, my love.”
Y/N’s eyes are overflowing with tears at his words and Fred panics for a second before he sees the biggest and most loving smile overtake Y/N’s face. “Fucking hell, you big dummy.”
She crosses the room, quicker than she’s ever moved before and pulls Fred’s 6’3 frame into her arms. She feels Fred pull her away, only slightly, so he can look down into her eyes and cup her cheek with his hand. His thumb is providing comfort as it strokes across her cheek and wiping away any stray tears.
She cups the outside of his hand with her own and brings her face to the side to kiss his palm. This is the closest the two have ever been and both their hearts feel like they could beat out of their chests at any moment. It’s the adrenaline from this moment that causes Fred to blurt out his next question, without any hesitation.
“Can I please kiss you before I die?”
Y/N laughs as she looks up at Fred. She doesn’t even give him an answer, she just pulls the tall boy down before locking their lips together. They’ve both kissed plenty of people, had many first kisses whether it be with first dates or partners but they can both agree this is the best kiss either of them has ever experienced.
Y/N is pouring everything she can into the kiss, knowing she will never get tired of the taste of caramel that she will forever associate with kissing the love of her life. She presses her lips harder against his, her tongue running along Fred’s chapped lips asking for more before he opens his mouth to massage his tongue with hers.
Fred decides to be a tease, pulling back slightly before capturing her lips again and biting her bottom lip slightly. This action pulls a moan from Y/N’s throat, soft enough that Fred almost misses it but he can’t help but smirk into the kiss. He wants nothing more than to kiss Y/N for the rest of his life, but eventually, he has to pull away to catch his breath and the whine that leaves Y/N’s mouth might be the cutest sound he’s ever heard in his life.
“I hope to God you know I’m never letting you kiss anyone else ever again, holy shit,” she says, cheeks flushed red and when she looks at Fred she thinks she’s fallen even further in love with him. His hair’s messy, thanks to her running her hands through it and his lips are slightly swollen. She thinks this might be the most beautiful she’s ever seen Fred in her life and if this is how gorgeous he looks after a few minutes of kissing, she’s secretly anticipating how gorgeous he’s going to look laying in her bed, naked.
Fred smiles dopily down at her, “Don’t worry darling, I never want to be with someone who isn’t you ever again.”
#fred weasley x reader#fred weasley fanfiction#fred weasley one shot#fred weasley fluff#fred weasley imagine#fred weasley#fae writes
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| 𝔲𝔫𝔱𝔦𝔩 𝔦 𝔪𝔢𝔱 𝔶𝔬𝔲 | [CHAPTER 4]
pairing; fratboy!wonwoo x reader
this chapter’s notes; fratboy!wonwoo, fingering, littlest bit of dirty talk, praise!kink, soft soft soft FLUFF hours, a bit of a filler chapter before the last chapter!! 😭 I can’t believe it’s almost ‘over’... This chapter has the least amount of smut yall will ever see with fratboy!wonwoo so don’t get used to it ☠️ LMAO 🤣🤣 also... it’s been a garbage week(boring work drama) for me so I’ll answer inbox msgs and stuff on sunday, I need to get away from the internet(and people) for a day dkfjhskh 😭💕 Ya’ll thank you for so much love and support with Caffeine and Until I Met You! It means so much to me and I appreciate every like, reblog and comment I get on it 🥺💕 No I will never be ending my fratboy!wonwoo au so don’t worry about that hehe 💕 For now, enjoy this soft ch 4 and I will see yall on Sunday! I love you, have a great weekend! 💕
[mood for this chapter: more than enough - alina baraz]
chapters; 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - x
“So…”
Wonwoo sighs - re-shelving another Edgar Allen Poe book. “So, what?”
Mingyu tilts his sunglasses down, eyebrows raised at the older male that continues to do his job instead of give him the time of day. “What’s going on with you, hyung? You’ve been… weird.”
“Okay, define weird.”
The younger male pouts as he takes his sunglasses off, pocketing them as he leans up against the bookshelf that Wonwoo is currently still shelving.
It only takes one utterance of your name for Wonwoo to stop in his tracks - fingertips on the spine of another book as he turns to Mingyu. “What about her? Did she say something to you?”
“No, but do you like her? I mean, ‘like’ like her.”
“Is it not… obvious? That I do? Did we not all collectively have that conversation about me giving her a set of keys to our house?”
Mingyu grimaces slightly as he mentally goes through all the times he’d even seen the two of you together and he’s only able to conjure up a few select memories - none of which were anything necessarily romantic. “Well… I wouldn’t say ‘obvious’, I guess. The two of you aren’t exactly the ‘kiss and hold hands in public’ kind of... people. More like the, ‘sneak off to fuck in a public restroom’ kind... Which, uh, isn’t really... romantic.”
This time, Wonwoo crosses his arms and leans up against the opposite bookshelf as he sighs.
It’d been a few days since he’d seen you and you’d been swamped in so much class work that you didn’t even have the time to come by the library or the frat house. And even while Wonwoo stood in between the bookshelves having a conversation with Mingyu, you were finishing an art project with Minghao that was due by the end of the day.
“I know. I told her it’d be kind of a slow crawl for me.” He plucks another book from the cart, staring at the glossy text as he simmers in his thoughts. “Mingyu, am I awkward?”
“Erm, well, I wouldn’t say that necessarily.”
Mingyu steps forward, patting Wonwoo on the shoulder as he smiles.
“You like her and you’re trying even if you’re not used to it. You gotta start somewhere, hyung. Even if you’re a fish out of water. But that’s okay, you can ask me for help if you want!”
“When are you gonna put a ring on Wonwoo-hyung?”
You snort at Minghao’s question - reaching for a clean paintbrush as he stands across from you in the large, empty studio. “First of all, can you not say it like that? I’m not gonna marry him, okay.”
The male rolls his eyes as he steps closer to you; his own hands and clothes covered in a colorful array of paints. “So you’re saying you never imagined hyung in a suit, hair slicked back and his buff arms carrying you off into your honeymoon?”
“W--wh--n--no! No, I haven’t!” You avoid his piercing stare as you focus on your end of the large canvas instead.
No, but I dreamt about it once.
“‘Hao, would you hurry! We’re supposed to be collaborating on this and it looks… like it’s 5 different art styles.”
“Don’t change the subject on me. And anyway, I like what you’re doing to hyung. Breaking him out of his shell, y’know? He’s just shy, that’s all. Needs a little work in the bold department.”
You bite down the urge to laugh because to you, Wonwoo was everything but shy when it came to the bedroom. Although, Minghao was right with everything else. “Yeah, I know. We went for breakfast together after I, um, stayed over a few nights ago and he kinda just sat there zoned out, picking at his waffles. He’s really cute when he wakes up in the morning though. Pouty and whiny.”
Grinning at Minghao, he pretends to gag in response before taking a seat next to you.
“Disgusting. Tell me more.”
Wonwoo makes an effort to check in with you throughout the day before he heads back to his room - asking you if you’d had your meals and if you’d finished your project on time.
You’d answered sporadically as you and Minghao raced to finish.
‘I’ll eat late probably… rly gotta finish or else my ass is failing lol’
‘Just don’t forget, okay? It’s not good for you to skip.’
Wonwoo lays down in his bed; yawning as he sets his phone onto the nightstand next to himself.
His eyelids feel heavy and he’s quick to give in to the tiredness that takes over him once he gets comfortable.
When Wonwoo finally decides to shift during his nap, he finds it difficult and extra warm.
“Mmh…”
His bleary eyes adjust to the, now, slightly darkened room as he makes out your figure tucked underneath his arm. He calls your name softly - waking you up from the nap that you’d apparently joined him in.
“Mmh… Wonwoo…” You snuggle in deeper, voice still laced with sleep. “You didn’t even budge when I came in…”
He chuckles softly as he readjusts to spoon you from behind instead; his strong arm wrapped around your waist to keep your body flush against his own.
“I’m surprised you came by, sweetheart. I would’ve just stayed awake had I known you were coming over.” His voice is groggy and laced with sleep as you sigh softly in return as you blink away the sleepiness.
“How was your day at the library? Miss me yet?” Wonwoo smiles into your shoulder before he tilts his head up to kiss the shell of your ear.
“Always, sweetheart. Although, Mingyu decided to keep me busy today.”
“Oh? Anything fun?”
He plays with the hem of your shirt, “Well… Fun isn’t the word I’d use to describe what that was. Nosy was more like it.”
This time you can’t help but snort in response. “You too? I think some people were being ‘lil moles today.”
“Wouldn’t doubt it. Did you end up just coming back here with Minghao from the studio?”
“Wasn’t planning on it, to be honest but… S’been a rough day.” Placing your hand over his arm, you squeeze slightly as you pull his arm around you tighter. “Our professor came by while we were working in the studio and said our project wasn’t up to par with what Minghao and I usually submit for projects. She didn’t fail us on the spot but she said we need to redo it for less credit or take the failing grade.”
Wonwoo nuzzles your neck; peppering small kisses on your clothed shoulder. “I take it the two of you are going to redo it?”
“Mm… We spent so long coming up with a concept and now we’re both stressed about coming up with something new. I walked over here with ‘Hao and he locked himself up in his room as soon as we got here. Figured I’d come hang out with you and found you napping… With your glasses on, no less.”
The two of you share a laugh; Wonwoo’s embrace making you feel more at ease.
“Can I help you de-stress a little, sweetheart?”
You stare at the opposite wall, nodding gently as Wonwoo’s hand leaves the hem of your shirt in favour of the waistband of your shorts.
“Just want you to feel good,” he whispers. “You deserve it. You’ve been working so hard, baby.”
He teases you softly; fingertips ghosting across your skin as you shiver. “Ah, Wonwoo…”
“You worked extra hard today too, didn’t you? I’m so proud of you for what you accomplished today.”
Your body heats up at his praise and you can’t deny that his deep, soft voice sends thrums of arousal pouring over your body just as he dips his hand into your lounge shorts. He touches you over your panties - fingertips ghosting against your mound as you moan his name shakily in return.
“I know your new idea is going to be great, baby. I believe in you.”
Soft whines threaten to spill as Wonwoo strokes you over your panties - slowly working you up as you find yourself trying to grind against his hand. “Y-yeah… ‘m p-pretty sure ‘Hao’s already working on it…”
Your voice is barely above a whisper as Wonwoo continues to stroke you gently; making no efforts to rush or add pressure to his feather-light touches.
A disappointed noise falls from your lips when he starts to pull his hand out of your shorts but it quickly turns into a content sigh when he starts teasing your chest instead.
“Mm, so soft…” Muttering against your shoulder, his eyes stare off into the dark room as he massages your body. “And all mine~”
You hum in response, “We should go on a date sometime…”
“You want to? We can go this weekend. After you’ve redone some of your project. I’ll take you somewhere nice for a job well done.”
You giggle softly; images of a wedding day’s Wonwoo dancing in your mind after the conversation you’d had with Minghao earlier. “I’d like that. We should do something for the whole day.”
“Whatever you’d like, baby.”
Wonwoo’s hand flits down your body again - snaking into your shorts and, this time, into your panties as you whine. “Do you wanna cum or go back to sleep, hmm?”
You ponder it for a second as the drowsiness equates the urge to cum on his fingers.
“Both? I wanna cum and then sleep a little more... If that’s okay?”
Wonwoo hums in agreement as his fingertips drag through your folds - collecting the wetness on them before he teases your soaked hole. “Only a little teasing gets you this wet, hmm? So cute.”
“Ah, f-feels good when you go slow t-too...”
He stores that away in his head for later; chuckling against your shoulder as he slowly starts to dip his middle finger into your cunt.
You feel warm and content when he starts a slow pace - thumb on your clit rubbing soft, slow circles while he pumps his finger into you.
“O-oh, Wonwoo...”
“You’re always good for me, baby. Always such a good girl.”
“Ah, Wonwoo...”
“You can cum whenever you want. You deserve it.”
He adds his index finger - thrusting both fingers into you as you mewl and arch away from his warm chest. Your toes curl and your thighs clamp and trap his hand between your legs as you start to grind down onto his nimble fingers.
“...W--Wonwoo...”
“That’s right, baby. Call my name, let me hear your pretty voice when your cumming for me.”
You turn your head - cries muffled into his pillow because despite his slower than usual pace, you find yourself already on the brink of cumming with his fingers knuckle deep inside of you and his thumb on your clit.
“Mmh... Ah... Feels s-so warm... and g-good...” You mutter, eyes blinking drowsily. “Gonna c-cum...”
He doesn’t say anything in return as he focuses on you and your pleasure; fingers scissoring and curling right into your g-spot as you clamp down onto them in a vice grip.
Wonwoo knows when you’re about to cum when he feels your hand coming down on his forearm, holding onto him for dear life when your orgasm still hits you just as hard.
“Ngh, Wo---Wonwoo!”
Your walls flutter around his fingers and make it harder for him to thrust them in and out with how tight you get.
“That’s my good girl. Cum for me, baby~”
His deep voice makes you whine - nails digging into his arm and body trembling as the pleasure steadily washes over you.
“Ah, bet your face is so pretty right now too~”
“Mmh, s-stop...” Your cheeks burn in slight embarrassment from his constant praise but you can’t deny the way it goes straight to your core and only prolongs your orgasm.
“Don’t be so shy, baby. It’s only you and me here.”
Wonwoo leans away slightly to kiss the crown of your head - still working you through your orgasm as you sigh contentedly in his arms.
Various thoughts run through his head in the moment, but the one that sits at the forefront of his mind is definitely how to make sure he kept treating you right.
Starting with your date that he would spend time meticulously planning.
‘Ah, I should ask Mingyu for some advice.’
#wonwoo smut#wonwoo fluff#seventeen smut#svt smut#seventeen fluff#wonwoo scenarios#wonwoo imagines#seventeen imagines#seventeen scenarios#svt scenarios#svt imagines#wonwoo fic#wonwoo#jeon wonwoo#uimy_meltwonu
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can i request the trend of tiktok “the faster you get to me the more kisses you get!” with tsukishima, akaashi, bokuto and hinata? 🥺👉👈
“THE FASTER YOU GET TO ME, THE MORE KISSES YOU GET” TREND
w/ tsukishima, akaashi, bokuto, hinata & iwaizumi
requests: OPEN
warnings: talk of pee and poop in iwaizumi’s
a/n: of course you can! thanks for the request! 💓 (also the trend is used more as a prompt than it is as the main focus whoops 🤡)
i added iwaizumi bc he was requested in another ask so i just merged the two. my character limit is still four max!
who gave him the right 🥵
the salt lick himself
this dude is annoyingggg
you already knew what his reaction was gonna be,, so why bother?
welll you just wanted to be like all the other tiktok girls 👉🏽👈🏽
you wait until you see tsukki and yama walking out of the club room and towards you
you’re bracing yourself for the embarrassment
“babe! the faster you get to me, the more kisses you get!”
no shit, he stops in his tracks. yama’s just looking at him like ‘what you finna do?’
you know what he does? turns around and starts walking in THE OTHER DIRECTION
you are… baffled
when finally catch up to him, you’re pouting
“dude, what the hell?”
he glances at you, then flicks your forehead dummy hard
you’re triggered, “did you just flick me?”
this snarky mf is now laughing at you
btw yamaguchi is very uncomfortable rn
tsukishima the leans down, bean pole headass, and kisses your forehead
“sorry i don’t do dumb tik tok trends”
“it’s not dumb! you just didn’t want to kiss me”
he looks at you with an unimpressed look, as if saying, ‘we both know that’s not true’
alas you’re still pouting
yama: “haha this is me, see you guys tmmr” *leaves in awkward*
tsukishima knows your not gonna stop acting like a baby until he gives you what you want
he sighs, walks a couple feet away from you, pulls out his phone and starts recording
“say the thing”
“huh?”
“the trend thing. say it”
your eyes light up so much and tsukki smiles a bit
he’s so soft for you uwu
“the faster you get to me, the more kisses you get!”
because he’s a tall boi, it only takes him a few steps to get to you but when he does, he kisses you hard
like damn, okay sir
when he pulls away you’re flustered asf, he chuckles and stops recording
“happy?”
this poor boy wouldn’t know a tiktok trend if it punched him the face
i hate to say it, but he’s a boomer 😔🤘🏽 just like dadchi
he’s at your house picking you up for a date and your sibling is bombarding him with questions
when you come out, akaashi is like ‘oh thank goodness’
you smile at him, then wack your sibling in their side
“stop bothering him you weirdo!”
“what we’re just having a nice lil chat”
you shake your head and start to walk away but your sibling is holding akaashi back, giving him the typical ‘you hurt her, i kill you’ speech
now you know your boyfriend is great when he’s under pressure but.. this is new territory for him
you remember a trend that you saw a while back and decide to do it now
you know keiji wants your family to like him, so he’ll be conflicted between going to you or staying and listening to your siblings speech
it’s perfect really
so you pull out your phone and start recording
“baby! the faster you get to me, the sooner we can go on our date and the more kisses you’ll get”
my guy just blinks, “it is getting late..”. plus he’s not opposed to the kissing part so he starts to walk towards you
“hey! i’m not done talking to you”
‘that’s true, it would be rude of me to walk away mid conversation… if you could even call it that’ he thinks
you laugh slightly, you can practically see the gears spinning in his head
“keiji come on we don’t have all day”
“don’t you walk away from me”
akaashi sighs loudly. the longer he spends talking to your sibling the less time he has with you. if he walks away, he’s at risk of your sibling hating him. he’s stumped.
suddenly he turns to your sibling, “sorry l/n, we can continue this discussion later. y/n and i have a date that’s very time sensitive. i apologize”
he then walks to you and grabs your hand before walking off
“y’know my crackhead sibling was just mess with you right? you could’ve just walked away”
“i figured, but that’s still rude”
ugh we stan boy who has manners
“so.. um, may i get a kiss now?”
omg he’s so cute i love him 🥺
you grin and pepper his face with a bunch of kisses, making him blush slightly
tbh you don’t even need to ask, this dude is infatuated w/ you
he’ll run to you any day of the week
but what had happened was.. y’all were on a date and bokuto went to go get ice cream
but that was like 15 mins ago and you’re just sitting on the park bench looking like a fool
and ngl you were a little worried bc bokuto is so easy to distract you’re thinking he fell into a pond or something
so you go to look for him and tbh it doesn’t take long cause cmon,, it’s bokuto
he be loud asf
n e ways, there he is in all his glory playing with a German Shepard who looked like it was trying so hard not to bite him
the owner looked nervous asf but was probably too nervous to say something social anixety be like that
bokuto spots you and waves at you frantically
“hey babe! look at this dog! it’s so cute!”
ugh bless him
you send the owner an apologetic look and turn back to bokuto
“it is cute but i think you’re aggravating it.. i don’t want you to get bitten. let’s go”
“it won’t bite me!” *to dog* “right? you’re too good to bite me, yes you are, yes you are”
*inhales* this stubborn kid, so now you got to think of a new tactic
you suddenly remember that bokuto is affectionate x1 mil
he would never miss a chance to be smothered in love
this was as good a time as any to do this trend and save your bf in the process :))
you whip out your phone, “hey baby? the faster you get to me, the more kisses you get”
when i tell you his head SWIVELED
the dude is an owl confirmed 🙌🏽
literally almost trips trying to get to you, now he’s looking at you like an excited puppy ready for pats
the owner gives you thankful look and leaves
bokuto is still staring at you, waiting for his smooches
so you deliver 😌 you grab his face and kiss all around and place a final kiss on his lips
bokuto looks so happy, like he’s smiling so wide rn
all hail tiktok it rly be saving your stupid boyfriend
my bby 🥺
he loves you so so so so much
hinata will do anything for you yes anything
and the feeling is mutual, but sometimes you cannot comprehend what goes on in that mind if his
like,, you could not, for the life of you, understand why he ran into MOVING TRAFFIC
let me tell you what happened
so you were shopping with your friends (and just to clarify y’all were a strip where there’s a bunch of stores on each block)
you guys were just casual walking and then your friend pointed out that it sounded like someone was calling your name
you looked around and there was your orange fuzzy bouncing up and down on the other side of the street
“BABY! BABE! Y/N! LOOK!”
too cute i swear
you smiled and waved, “hi baby!”
“wait until i get across this street imma kiss you so hard!”
cue your friends gagging
you giggle and decide to reference a tiktok cause why not?
“the faster you get to me, the more kisses you can get!”
b-but he thought you were serious
so yes he ran into the middle of a busy street
you are traumatized, paralyzed with fear if you will, you thought your boyfriend was going to die right in front of you
when he finally reached you, you scolded him mother hen mode activated
“why the hell would you do that hinata?!”
uh oh, you used his last name.. not good
“but you said–”
“i was joking!”
oh. now he’s embarrassed and sad bc you’re mad at him
at least he thought you were until you grabbed him and hugged him tightly, “don’t ever do any dumb shit like that again, okay? you scared me”
“i won’t,, but since i did risk my life, can i get a kiss?”
“NO.”
i feel like y’all have a relationship where you guys can be mean(?) to each other w/o getting offended
so you guys are at your house watching Netflix together and he suddenly gets up and leaves your room
“where are you going?”
“gotta piss”
istg i hate the word “piss” but IK he says that instead of “pee”
n e ways you resume watching the show but your bf’s been gone for like 10 mins
you go to the bathroom and knock on the door, “hey, you good in there? it doesn’t take 10 minutes to pee”
you hear him groan, “fuck off”
and then,, it all clicks, “are you constipated?!”
“FUCK OFF”
now you’re laughing your ass of bc what the fuck
“don’t clog my toilet nasty”
“y/n i swear to god if you don’t leave me alone–”
“what? are you gonna fling your doo doo on me?”
you finally stop teasing him and go back to your room
you send him a text, ‘still constipated? 💩’
‘breaking up w/ you is looking mighty tempting rn 🥴’
‘rude 🤧 but hey, the faster you poop, the more kisses you get’
this dude left you on read
and didn’t return until 20 mins later
“damn i know my bathroom stinks now”
“shut up and give me my kisses”
you raise an eyebrow, “i– you took 20 mins”
“okay.. did you want me to get up mid shit and come to you?”
you don’t why but that shit had you cackling, you reach up and pull him close to you
you give him a couple of pecks and a deep kiss
aww he’s smiling 🥺
“i love you my lil doo doo machine”
he pushed you off your bed
tanzaniiite © 2020 — all rights reserved. do not repost, modify, or copy. do not plagiarize. thank you.
#tanz writes 【📖】#haikyuu!!#haikyuu fandom#haikyuu imagines#haikyuu x reader#haikyuu tsukishima#haikyuu akaashi#haikyuu bokuto#haikyuu hinata#haikyuu iwaizumi#haikyuu smau#haikyuu smut#tsukishima kei#akaashi keiji#bokuto koutarou#hinata shōyō#iwaizumi hajime#tsukishima kei x reader#akaashi keiji x reader#bokuto koutarou x reader#hinata shoyo x reader#iwaizumi hajime x reader#tsukishima x reader#akaashi x reader#bokuto x reader#hinata x reader#iwaizumi x reader#hq akaashi#hq bokuto#haikyuu headcanons
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wholly skippable post, not trying to piss anyone off ok, but i got an itch about this.
listen
i get it, i really do. i get why burnt hand whump is so favorite for our bard. i do honestly really get it, and i love burnt hand whump too, but--!
plea under cut, addressed to those who have not watched twn s2 but do read the fics.
i need everyone who's reading all this delicious angst and trauma over a canonical physical injury to actually watch the episodes in question, not JUST read fic
because canonically it just ain't that bad. i'm sorry! it's not! in canon it's not, it's really clear that the worst of the torture was legit psychological. firefucker smacked him around and tied him up, then *started* burning his fingertips. enough to freak an anxiety-fueled musician the fuck out, and enough to hurt *at the time*
i've had worse burns working at starbucks. in fact i had nerve damage from repeated burns working at starbucks. i could still play guitar.
it's been fully healed since like a year after i stopped working there.
rience did not even hold the not-a-lighter under jaskier's fingers long enough to fuck up his fingerprints (i got a match head stuck burning to my thumb when i was three and now my left thumb has a different TYPE of print from all my others. also it was healed in two weeks.)
jaskier's hand is FINE. he was playing the spoons in jail after!! that's impacty! he was not using his wrist. we have seen his hands! he was practically juggling that jasper, he was superduper wringing his wet shirt out, he in no way favored that hand. his hands are physically absolutely fine (and very pretty)
his MIND is not! that was traumatic. that was torture. even if it hadn't been torture it would still have been traumatic for him!
look. i was three. *thirty nine years ago* i burned my thumb playing with matches. i'm STILL afraid of matches. i smoked for 20 years and NEVER used matches. (i am quit for a year and a half now!! :D)
canonically he is gonna be fucked up about it for a WHILE, but his hand was already fine by the time geralt picked him up.
SO MY POINT IS:
whump the bard, WHUMP HIM, write all the fucked up permadamage hand fics and i will read them ALL bc i LOVE them, but darling dears who get your twn content from reading fics, please oh please be aware that that level of damage is not canon.
fuck yes fic is for making shit up and exaggerating shit and exploring what-ifs and all the wonderful stuff people write!!
(i rly love bardburn fics)
(just, it is not actually a big deal physically in canon)
(this is a thing for me because i started with fanfic and gifsets and i KNOW how it is when you haven't canoned yet, and i am seeing really good and prolific writers cheerily talk about it like it's the incontrovertible truth, and it may be in the vast majority of post-twn-s2 fics, but it's not in canon hhhhhhh)
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RoW Theories and Things I Want to See
with RoW literally a few weeks away, here’s some theories your way.
this is Really long. like, really very long; mind you.
Nikolai might become a disabled character.
It’s just the vibes. If we can take reference from the Too Clever Fox story, there’s a line that says “...and his [Koja’s] fur never quite sat right the same...”, which might hint at it (mostly bc i don’t want him to die). Also if this is indeed possible, it can be used to address ableism if it exists in this universe, especially since Nikolai is someone in the highest position of power.
Zoya will experiment the shit out of powers.
Idk why the synopsis says that using her powers might be a great deal, which tbf will be because she is truly the most most powerful atm; but Zoya wouldn’t mind taking the step outside of the old norms and bend the orders until they serve their purpose. That’s the entire goal rly.
But all along, she will consciously keep herself mindful to not hunger or discharge her power in a way that may cause harm. She knows the tyranny of the Darkling and the ways he employed. She knows better.
More character depth to Zoya.
Given the excerpts, the book does seem to explore Zoya’s infinite grief. And of course her Suli heritage, which a great part of the fandom consistently wants to shadow what with the talk “white features/ part Ravkan” bs.
But there’s more. I hope RoW will show Zoya’s dilemma (that was alr hinted in KoS) she has with the power she holds, the responsibility she has with having that power + using it in the way that will not be detrimental to her and the country. It will be a great way to portray her self-awareness and doubt and insecurity. She is a good leader, that much is told in text but not shown. There’s character development from the end of R&R until KoS that makes her evolve from a what she was then to the capable and mature 22 year old she is in KoS.
Of course all of their capabilities will come to light in RoW but I think Zoya and the agency to her as a character will play an integral part. More so because Zoya is to be the conduit to reversing the current Grisha orders, which runs in parallel with the fact that she needs to go back, go back to the roots of her Grisha knowledge and roots of her i.e. her unending grief and trauma.
She will need to forgive herself while also dealing with the guilt and anger she may have caused due to her position and power. All of this while dealing with her own complex and contrasting emotions due to her own trauma.
Nikolai is held for treason.
The word of allying with The Darkling may be out and that is enough reason for the entire country to turn against him. The secret about the monster causes issues more than enough already, and this will plunge the country into deep political turmoil and threats to security. So RoW will be more politically driven. That said...
There’s no overt war.
By this I mean that there will not be war on the battlefield, both armies or more charging at each others’ enemies and such. Ravka cannot afford one either. The excerpts have already proved that. There will be skirmishes akin to a war scenario, but a complete battle like the last battle in R&R? Like a final battle? That’s not going to be there, I think… What I’m assuming might happen is that the Fjerda and Ravka will take a possible Cold War route, if it isn’t already the case they’re already dealing with atm.
Ravka’s monarchy will collapse.
It may become a democracy or any other form of public or majority vote. But the monarchy (as well a possible dictatorship, esp with the Darkling returned) will be eliminated. ...Or so I hope, since it has been alluded to in KoS.
But that poses many problems. With no one line for the throne, let alone with a crime so dark like a blot on Nikolai’s skill (of taking the Darkling’s help), it is possible that Ravka will shun it, right alongside being torn about it because Nikolai has been, for the best of his ability, a good King. All of this in line with the Resistance rising in West Ravka.
This ties in with the court matters, especially if I want to hold the further points I make true. The resolution to acquit Nikolai of his charges requires a testification forth a jury which will then make a decision about his motives and future.
Zoya as the Interim Head.
After all of this, Zoya’s point about Ravka not accepting a Grisha Queen will be true after all, because there will be no monarchy to welcome such an arrangement.
But Ravka will need a good and trustworthy leader despite Grisha powers and Zoya is the best person to take care of that. The comment “...becoming a steady leader...” and the “Welcome home, Commander,” were there in KoS for a reason (and this is what I think it will link to).
That being said, there’s more nuance to this than my summary. Zoya is a character of colour. That—in addition to the already existing threats, objections and possible question of capability in the position—ill play into how she will be able to discharge her responsibility. It’s not going to be convenient.
EDIT: taken from a reblog/addition to the og post:
A smoother/more structured transition
Once after the monarchy collapses and a leader must be chosen, it will not be Nikolai. Nor will it be Zoya, though she might serve as an interim head. What I assume might be possible is that someone older is chosen, someone older and loyal and with the proof of knowledge and service to the country. Possibly by majority vote or elected by a council.
Instead of the sudden change, this can be a smoother (if that can even be said about such a major political scenario change) or more structured. I also say this because a. if Nikolai is indeed charged (and later acquitted), firstly his political career will already hold a blot if the word about using the Darkling as a resource is out and secondly, he’s way too young to serve as the leader (by modern standards, sure, but like, the required age will be set while drafting the constitution? currently its 35+).
Instead, the current cast can become representatives (which Zoya would already be, (mostly the head of the) international committee that safeguards the Grisha all over the world) and the Triumvirate will be dissolved. (it should be, tbh)
And hey, b. after all of this, they can and kind of need to take a step back. Nikolai and Zoya will be able to truly explore their relationship, given how Nikolai mentions how he wouldn’t marry unless he’d have had the chance to court someone and marry someone he barely knows nor knows him. For Zoya’s part, she does know Nikolai but surely probably not the extent of openness that a healthy relationship has, and on Nikolai’s part, he admits he barely knows her beyond as a General except for just little things about her.
They could be able to realize and work on their feelings while alongside being involved with the workings of the country and the constitution.
“One day you will overstep and I will not be so forgiving.”
Need I say more? Something that Zoya does will cost her Nikolai’s goodwill and we know Zoya knows her practicality and the extent to which she will unapologetically move if there is threat to the country and its King. She will do what was right and required.
A major part of that line ties in with Magnus Opjer and I think with the confidence in the versatility of her powers, Zoya might as well move w/o any word to the Triumvirate to eliminate the most direct threat to the throne. This will bring splits in Nikolai and Zoya’s relationship.
How this tension between them will be resolved without compromising either of their values, without playing into fandom stereotypes and others must be carefully handled. All of this while showing the best of their dynamicity, practicality and priority as they carefully pull out just those weak sticks of the jenga without putting the whole country into trouble. And with a war in plain sight, they’d know better than pointlessly argue and would rather see how the two of them are wrong. This ordeal will bring out just how condensed power is in the current scenario, imo.
Importance on the way women have shaped history.
Something that KoS has already set precedence for. Zoya being a PoC, Nina taking into account of the sufferings of women she comes across and the consistent ‘Who will remember them?’ will be elaborated on further. As for how it is done and how well it is done, that remains to be seen.
Baghra is alive but maybe not thriving bc she’s stuck in the Ice Court.
They entered a chamber where an old woman sat with her hands chained, flanked by guards. Her eyes were vacant. As each prisoner approached, the woman gripped his or her wrist.
A human amplifier. [...] But the Fjerdans used them for a different purpose – to make sure no Grisha breached their walls without being identified.
Kaz watched Nina approach. He could see her trembling as she held out her arm. The woman clamped her fingers around Nina’s wrist. Her eyelids stuttered briefly. Then she dropped Nina’s hand and waved her along.
Had she known and not cared? Or had the paraffin they’d used to encase Nina’s forearms worked?
- Chapter 22. Kaz; Part 4: Trick to Falling, Six of Crows.
Nina will be the one to free her and together they might wage a war from Djerholm together.
This gets even more interesting because we know the anguish and scorn that Baghra feels for her son at the same time; she understands the wrongness that he used to seek and will continue to. Zoya does take Baghra’s name at the Fold when she mourns and rages over how people forget the destruction and most importantly, forget the women. Baghra could be the symbol of the stag as the art piece depicts, or will be shown with relation to the Darkling’s powers.
As for how she will play into the story, perhaps she will be the one to help reverse and find the roots of the orders, in the sense that changes the perception of the Grisha powers for the Grisha as well as the common folk of Ravka. She is the only other person other than Juris and the Darkling to have the age of eras together, knowing Ilya Morozova, and she will be instrumental in giving Ravka an advantage over Fjerda. Either that or she will help in scrubbing the prejudices of Fjerda slowly away with whatever powers she has left. Or both.
Alina will reappear, but will not contribute to the plot significantly.
Zoya understands that the truth she knows about the Darkling is very minimal not enough to end him for once and for all. It makes sense that she will probably consult Alina for it. So, Malina appearance, possibly at the orphanage. Alina will not directly contribute to this war, but she will play a critical role in defeating the Darkling.
Besides, Alina —and Baghra— are the only ones who know that there has only ever been two Darklings. Zoya did sense, multiple times during KoS, that the Darkling is damn old. Yuri mentions it. And while it is not outright specified, the fact that Zoya thinks that she realizes just how ancient Lizabetha is in context of meeting the Darkling is enough proof for her to seek more information about the age and the older skill of the Darkling.
And I think it goes without saying that I want to hope that the Darkling and Alina will not meet. Pls, she’s had enough.
Lada is the lost, other friend that Zoya refuses to bury.
“She saw her mentor die and her worst enemy resurrected, and she refuses to bury another friend.”
Liliyana is dead, we know. But there’s no other mention of Lada except for the “wondering what happened to the pug faced girl.” Lada is possibly a part of the group of women and a Grisha returning to Ravka from Fjerda, exploited by the parem. She might die being unable to withhold the sheer torment of the parem induction, which will devastate Zoya because Lada was also the closest she’s had to a family with Liliyana.
Either that or Lada is already dead or dies some other way, and Zoya cannot bring herself bear the grief of losing her.
Cameos: Inej and Jesper.
The most likely of the crows to appear in RoW are Inej and Jesper and they’ll play equally important roles in the plotline. Here’s a breakdown of why:
Inej
Inej has taken the responsibility of becoming a slave hunter, and it makes sense for Inej to make an appearance in the book, given that there’s going to be a ship taking the Grisha from Fjerda to Ravka.
The women aboard are vulnerable and require immediate attention, which Inej will immediately zero in on. She will have enough reason to suspect both Leoni and Adrik on the ship, especially when the jurda parem is still a secret. Leoni and Adrik cannot give that information away because they don’t trust Inej (and have no reason to either). Inej won’t trust them either, not until she understands that the reason why the women are being taken to Ravka and for what reasons.
Which gives her excellent reason to step in, try to analyze the situation and help the women accordingly.
Here’s an exciting thought though. Once after the entire misunderstanding is overcome and Inej understands (esp. if Nina is brought into the conversation and security and secrecy of the conversation is ensured), there may be discussion about how the Grisha might find a safer space in Ravka.
Inej’s appearance might also extend to playing a pivotal role in giving Zoya the confidence to seek her heritage and where she hails from, to embrace the part of her past and forgive herself and others for her mistakes.
ALSO,
Grisha finding a safer space in Ravka will mean that Inej can pitch Jesper’s case for him to Zoya. Being the highest authority who takes cares of the responsibilities of the Grisha, Zoya will be the best person to talk about this with.
And so, here comes Jesper.
Jesper
For one, I wish Jesper and Leoni interact, talk and just bond like the iconic siblings they would be. <3 But more than that, Jesper plays very integral to the plot for more reasons.
Jesper’s arc will parallel Zoya’s. Both of them are new to their powers in their own individual sense; Zoya is trying to use her new powers in a way that hasn’t been done before, thereby breaking the Grisha orders of powers and Jesper (assuming he has decided that he might want to learn and embrace his Grisha powers) is learning them afresh.
This journey of them trying to embrace, learn and relearn and reject older norms and experiment really work in tandem.
That will lead us to a further (plot) theories.
Ties with Novyi Zem
As of the KoS end, Ravka has no support from anyone atm. Sure the Kerch will provide funds but Ravka has no real allies. Here’s where Novyi Zem and Jesper come in.
We know Novyi Zem is a new country and also that it is the second safest country for the Grisha in the universe. As of KoS, their agreements are not renewed and they would be since between Kerch and Novyi Zem, Ravka was forced to pick Kerch. Yet Ravka needs their help in acquiring jurda for the antidote.
So here’s the deal: Ravka will get their jurda but at many conditions that the Novyi Zem will impose on Ravka to not let exploitation get in the way.
The conditions imposed could be (these are just some at the top of my head but I hope there are more to ensure the safety and security of the Zemeni, in Novyi Zem and in Ravka too) :
Naval support from Ravka
We know of the Zemeni ships and ofc Nikolai has been hard at work trying to develop plans to use the sea to its fullest advantage. While the news of the izmars’ya isn’t public, Zemeni can place a condition for technical aid from Ravka since Ravka does have the technical knowledge it can dispatch as a condition.
A Grisha School in Novyi Zem
Think about it. Ravka, despite being the safest place for the Grisha, still isn’t entirely safe. Not all Grisha become soldiers in Ravka, they have a choice to abstain but those who are training are still recruited a honed for purpose alike preparing for war, especially the teens and preteens from the time of the Civil War. The training does take a lot of time. Ravka intends to make a home first and then service, but at the moment, while the Grisha are provided safety, it’s not assured in the best sense. Both the facts about a home and service are in precarious positions atm.
TL;DR: Ravka isn’t entirely safe for Grisha therefore the Grisha themselves too are not + Ravka is war torn.
So what happens?
One of the conditions as the next best country that serves as home to the Grisha, Novyi Zem may put forth the prospect of building a Little Palace like institution for the Grisha in Novyi Zem. It sounds morally wrong in the sense that the Grisha there will also be trained for war, but the war will end and soon, the Grisha will not be subject to serve for something but engage in economic activities as anybody else with the progression of time.
All of this won’t happen immediately either; learning their powers, honing it in the way that is unocnventional from what it had been pre-RoW and that transition + the building of the establishment in Novyi Zem and laying foundation for the transnational panel or committee for Grisha that Zoya talks about will all take so much time.
A few Grisha representatives from Novyi Zem can learn at the Little Palace and by the time the construction of the institution is done in Novyi Zem, these Grisha, along with other willing Grisha who either want to return to the country they were born in (like Leoni) or are offered to teach in a different country can do so too.
There will be stricter terms so as to not ensure exploitation and possible colonization in these nations.
Zoya mentions in one of her chapters that eventually there will be a need for the a transnational panel or committee for Grisha. Jesper can Zoya can make it possible, adding in other countries to the panel slowly as the war recedes.
Kaz and Wylan?
Least likely to make an appearance, in my opinion. I think they’ll be mentioned plenty of times or brought up once and given great importance for how they can help in the side plot.
Shu Support:
This is more a hope than an actually theory dfbkdhjadfh but Makhi might have to step down from the throne because Ehri will take the place; either as a Queen (no...) or she might oversee the process of strengthening Shu Han and finding a leader (if she doesn’t want to become one herself).
Ehri is capable, more than capable despite the little we know of her from the last chapter in KoS. All I hope is for an understanding and friendship between Nikolai and Ehri (and the subsequent cancelling of the marriage duH) for this to happen. She has little interest in statecraft but with the time she might spend with Nikolai, she might change her views. Even if not then she still gets the happy ending she deserves with Mayu (which is canon at this point rly).
Emotional Development or Breakdowns
Okay but I really, really, really hope we get to see all the three protagonists lose their shit and deal with their trauma, seek help or trying to stop isolating themselves or anything else they do to cope? Nina, Zoya and Nikolai, all of them cry, all of them get to completely lose it, let themselves be human and healthily cope and learn to rely on the people they trust the most. Like the sheer power and potential to show the myriad of ways to deal with grief, sadness, stress and more and make use of the trio’s backgrounds to show healthy and diverse ways of helping themselves, by letting themselves and others help them is just *combusts* Incredible!
That being said, can I also ask for moments of fear and desolation from the side characters too? Impending war isn’t small business, it will take its toll on people, and all these reactions just cement their fears and what they value the most so. pls. Humanizing them rly.
The Saving Each Other
As much as I mostly kinda hate this trope, there are traces in the KoS that Zoya might be the one to end Nikolai’s affliction. On the other hand, there is talk of Nikolai helping Zoya control her powers which seems counterintuitive when you consider that Zoya knows that there is a line that she must never cross and that she is very, very careful about it and will continue to be.
They can instead be the ones who motivate each other in times of distress as they always do (as shown with how Nikolai tries to gain control over his monster during the burning thorn ritual in KoS, allowing himself the vulnerability but also knowing that giving up will be unforgivable to both himself and Zoya as well) but I seriously do not wish for each other to be the ones directly ending one another's misery. Or perhaps this is just a fear imo that Leigh wouldn’t even take the route of (in which case, thank fuck).
Stab Stab Stab
Zoya gets the chance to kill the Darkling with the rest of her friends. After all, Darkling does call them all his old friends. Just Julius Caeser him all the way and put a bow tie on the book. *chef’s kiss* Everybody deserves a second chance... at ending a tyrant when it fails the first time.
+
So far, this is it. Rule of Wolves is in less than a few weeks and im- asdfghjkl. not Ready. i’m more Worried than Ready.
#zoya nazyalensky#nikolai lantsov#nina zenik#rule of wolves#king of scars#jesper fahey#inej ghafa#ehri kir taban#hanne brum#grishaverse#alina starkov#mal oretsev#baghra morozova#the darkling#kos#row#leigh bardugo#row theories#zoyalai#tw ableism mention#tw war#i hope these aren't insensitive. esp the one point about war + the theories about novyi zem#and ofc the disability part too#if the way i've expressed some points are hurtful i sincerely apologize. i will change them and learn better#thanks for reading this super long post lmao#long post //#cw long post#???#anyw#row spoilers
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𝐒𝐓𝐑𝐀𝐘 𝐊𝐈𝐃𝐒 ⇉ skz with pregnant!reader
hyunjin x reader | part four of dad!skz
↬ genre; fluff
↬ warnings; pregnancy, lots of cursing (i have a streak), birth, n kkami bein a meanie
↬ notes; ok this might be my fav in the series | 1.5k wc
u and hyunjin actually were broken up when u found out about the pregnancy
u waited (stalled fuck off) until five months since u really didnt know what to do with the news
u kinda feel like ur insane, playing your ex-boyfriends music constantly and watching interviews of him but it kept u company and gave u a reminder that u still needed to tell him
u got this rly cute popped out bump, just rly kinda like those movies but u know its gonna get bigger and grow to have stretch marks
one day ur just sitting on the sofa of your apartment n the next thing u know ur door is being opened and hyunjin is barging in
ofc ur in a sports bras and a pair of basketball shorts cause they r comfortable and shirts r overrated
ur there with set out marshmallows, graham crackers, and chocolate, as well as peppermint sticks on the side just eating them together
ur in the middle of eating a smore u had put together
u swallow ur smore slowly, sucking on ur fingertips n just staring at him
“oh my fucking god- and it’s true?”
ur honestly so confused until u remember u dont have on a shirt n ur bump is showing
ur standing up in a millisecond, hyunjin getting more upset by the second just looking at u
“why— how? how could you just not tell me?”
baby boy has those angry tears and the strained voice hes just so upset and the guilt is setting in for u
“i’m five and a half months.”
fuck hormones cause next thing u know ur crying and u cant do anything to make it stop
u guys really can’t be mad at each-other, ur relationship was filled with nothing but kindness and it ended only because u two felt it was going no where
ofc u two argued about it and in the end hyunjin was the one who walked out
“we can try again. you can move back in right? we can stay together and put back the pieces.”
u agreed n by the next morning he was there to help u pack ur things up n take them back to his place
he ends up seeing the box of baby stuff, with unopened bottle packages and sonograms, as well as a disc that was labelled as your 3D ultrasound
u find him just sitting there, staring at the black and white sonogram with tears freely falling down his cheeks
he doesn't even notice u next to him until ur thumb swipes the tear away from his cheek
u two just smile at each-other, his arm wrapping around u n pulling u in to his side
“that’s our baby?” he asks, not removing his eyes from the little white blob that barely was the size of a jaw breaker n u just whispered, “yea, it is.”
ur relationship doesn’t exactly get back into what it was at first,,
ur both nervous and cautious around each other
at first he insists he can just sleep on the couch so u can take his bed but u insist u both can sleep together
hyunjin doesn’t mean to but he somehow always winds up with his arm around u n ur bump every morning
he will talk to the bump n tell them how they r gonna have the best mommy n daddy 🥺
“did u know ur mommy is one of my favorite people to be with? i know ur gonna hear the story one day of how we became parents but i have always loved her, even when we weren’t together i loved your mommy. i hope one day you will love someone as much as i love your mommy, i hope you get your mommy’s personality bub.”
ur fake sleeping wbk but u dont move so u can let him talk
around eight months u two are way more comfortable n are getting closer
he lets u borrow his clothes because u used to do that even when u weren’t pregnant and he figured they were more comfortable & better looking than ur maternity outfits 😣
he rly goes the whole nine yards, buying anything u can think of for the baby n he’ll sometimes wake u up from ur sleep (if he’s rly excited) just so he can show u what he bought
hyunjin is in love with u and kkami cuddling together
also when ur due date got closer u both def went out for walks with kkami or played in the dog park with kkami
(u couldn’t really be as active as hyunjin but it was fine with u just watching)
something within hyunjin changes n he just gets so shy n flustered around u ^.^
he’s crushing so hard on u and u can guess he is but then again u two were just living together for the pregnancy
it’s probably three in the morning n hyunjin had just came home
ofc u were crying
a rly cute dog ad was playing with a baby in it as well :(
u explain n hiccup while doing so
hes so s o f t at this moment
he presses a soft kiss to ur lips n ur like wow thats um—
he doesn’t even care how shocked u r this man goes back in for more kisses
“i want you, i wanna be a real family. i wanna one day marry you, have more babies or get other dogs, that’s all i’ve ever wanted since the day we met.”
enywayz u two r dating,, a g a i n
spooning half of the time during ur last few weeks of pregnancy, but the boys come over frequently n for some reason jeongin is always bringing presents?? its cute but u guys RLY didn’t need anymore toys for the baby
u guys r just cuddling n he’s got one hand on ur bump before ur like
“ow,, fuck that hurt.”
“hey don’t swear around the baby!”
u just suppose it’s a hard kick since the baby had been active a lot recently n the pains had been occurring often
kkami is very cuddly today n he’s giving u kisses
hyunjin lowkey jealous cause kkami doesn’t ever give him kisses like that ⸜( ⌓̈ )⸝
yall ever seen the thing where dogs know pregnant people the best n they can like SENSE something goin on??
well kkami was on it
baby kkami is sniffing u n just restless in ur lap n its a lil weird cause kkami is ALWAYS sleeping or sitting still cause kkami has turned as lazy as u n hyunjin
u have this feeling but instead u just tell hyunjin u gotta pee :P
newsflash: u didnt n as soon as u got up, boom, theres ur water breaking and running down ur leg
“it feels gross.”
ur literally whining about ur pants while a baby is coming out of ur ... hooha 😳 n hyunjin is freaking out
he’s rushing around the rooms n making sure everything is in the bag and nothing gets left behind
last thing on his mind is changing ur clothes
though he does, putting u in his baggy sweatshirt and a pair of his shorts
hes freaking out lets be honest the thought of u giving birth is fuckin scary
hyunjin is so out of it and spaced out while ur cool n talking normally with pauses everytime theres a contraction
“aish, why are you so worried? i’m the one that should be worried!!”
ur not cool after an u hit the four hours in labor mark
u do not want to be t o u c h e d
touching u is off limits ur so sweaty n ur body feels like its crumbling u cannot deal with someone holding ur hand or holding u
hyunjin just sits there
hes kinda in a different realm while he stares at the clock on the wall
hes so ready to meet the baby but apparently ur body was exactly 4 centimetres not ready :(
hes just trying to distract u by talking with the boys n his other friends, all of the face timing to talk to the parents to be 🥺
yall r wrapping up a call with jeongin when u have the built up pressure feeling again
he doesn’t even explain to jeongin hes so quickly to hang up n ask u whats wrong
“i— it feels like i have to push.”
he’s already pressing the pretty lil white button on ur bed for the nurses n doctors
they confirm that u indeed r ready to push and that the baby is in position
hyunjin trying to take a peek WHAT A WEIRDO
yall hearing ur baby has a head full of hair and u just give hyunjin this look
like WTF no wonder why u had so much heartburn its because of ur fuckin rapunzel baby daddy
here comes the cries, loud n u just heard the quietest sob from beside u which was hyunjin
“it’s a baby boy, congrats!!”
his lil puppy baby boy 🥺
he had a lil pout like his daddy n his brown locks on top of his head
it was kinda creepy how similar they looked
anyways u dont care ur lil boy is p e r f e c t and nobody could dare tell yall different
u would disagree anyways because thats ur lil pouty baby boy n hes so cute 🥺
“we got a pretty good break-up story right? one for the books.”
he’s got baby boy in his arms bundled up but that doesn’t stop u from smacking his arm before kissing him quickly
“yea, we do.”
©️ maysdiors 2020 :: all rights reserved. do not repost my work on tumblr or other platforms.
#stray kids#skz#pregnant!reader#hyunjin#hyunjin angst#hyunjin fluff#hyunjin x reader#mom!reader#dad!skz#dad!stray kids#bangchan x reader#minho x reader#changbin x reader#felix lee x reader#seungmin x reader#jeongin x reader#stray kids angst#stray kids scenarios#stray kids fluff#skz angst#skz fluff#skz scenarios#i.n x reader#stray kids au#skz au#stray kids series#skz series#jisung x reader#dad!hyunjin#hyunjin x pregnant!reader
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i’m gonna try out my luck for the renji bday thing😭
- renji being a mediator between rukia and ichika(idk why i feel like rukia and ichika would get into rly dumb arguments and just fight like they’re the same age)
- renji and ichika get a tattoo
- jealous rukia(of course)
- anything that takes place in inuzuri, i loved your ‘dumb teens stealing kisses’ snippet so much 😭
- more of the tattoo artist renji falls for a client AU
I hope you’ll forgive me for cheating a bit, but when I saw this, I said, “what if I just gave you more of the dumb teens stealing kisses” fic? because honestly, it’s just sitting here.
For people who don’t obsessively follow my incoherent ramblings about my own WIPs, this is an excerpt for i can’t believe i found you in that town, a story that takes place during Renji and Rukia’s last year in Inuzuri. Two out of their three friends have passed away, their powers are growing steadily stronger, and they are starting to face the fact that they aren’t children anymore. I have two more parts of Heart is a Muscle to get through first, so I never work on it, but it is very close to my heart.
PS: This is not going on ao3 at this time, because I really do intend to finish it eventually, so consider this a Tumblr exclusive.
❄ ❄ ❄
In a strange confluence, all three of them have found gainful employment at the same time.
Renji is guarding crates. He does not ask what is in the crates. He does not want to know what is in the crates. He stands next to the crates and his size deters most people. Occasionally, he is called upon to punch someone in the face. It’s good work.
Fujimaru got him this gig, actually. Mameji was good with numbers and he taught Fujimaru a lot, and now Fujimaru has a gig keeping the books for the guys who own the crates. That seems like pretty good work to Renji, too. Fujimaru says he wishes it involved more punching people. Renji wishes his job involved punching fewer people. Everyone’s got complaints.
Rukia has found work in a shop. This is charming and hilarious to both boys. It’s a pawn shop that paradoxically seems to buy about three times as much junk as it sells. It’s obvious that the only reason the owner hired Rukia is because the clientele likes to come in and look at her, but the fact is, she’s an amazing bargainer, and she’s making him a ton of change.
Renji stops in one late afternoon when his own shift is over, and watches her sell a man a knife that looks like it will break if he looks at it funny. She offers to throw in a shitty ball of twine and the man agrees to pay what is easily four times what the knife is worth, and leaves smiling. Amazing.
The shop owner eyes Renji warily. Renji never starts trouble, and he’s even stopped it once or twice, but at the same time, his presence is cramping the appeal of the pretty shopgirl.
“I’m off,” Rukia tells her boss.
“See y’tomorrow,” the seedy man grumbles.
“You don’t get paid every day?” Renji asks Rukia loudly. “I get paid at the end of every shift.”
“She gets paid at the end of the week,” the shopkeeper grouses.
Renji flexes one arm experimentally, admiring his own bicep. “It’s nice getting paid every day. Makes you want to come back the next day, y’know.”
“She comes back every day so she can get paid at the end of the week.”
Rukia’s eyes dart between them.
“Ah, you must be a great boss, very trustworthy,” Renji comments, stretching his back. “Although gettin’ paid every day is a nice way to show trust, too. Hey, Ru, you wanna stop at Takahashi’s on the way home? I heard they got in some dried mackerel and I,” he winks at Rukia’s boss, “got paid today.”
“Pfft,” Rukia huffs, wrapping her shawl around her shoulders. “I’m sure it’s a scam. We need rice, though, and more water.”
“Hey, girl,” Rukia’s boss spits out. “You had a good shift! Here’s your pay for today, as a reward for doing so well. Come back tomorrow, okay?”
“Of course,” Rukia agrees, taking the coins with a sly smile.
As they head out of town, she jabs him in the ribs with her elbows. “You’re so obvious.”
“Got you paid, didn’t I?”
“You did, thank you. He hates you, you know.”
Renji sighs dramatically. “How can I live with myself?”
Rukia snorts. “He’s gross, I hate him. I hate that whole job. Smiling at people. Acting kind to horrible people. It’s so fake. I don’t know why you like working so much, I’d rather just steal.”
“I’ve seen you working, what you do is not much different from stealing.” Renji rubs his hands together. It’s getting cold, especially with the sun setting. “I appreciate the effort, though. I mean, we do. Me and Fujimaru. I like this. Having money, that is. It’s nice.”
Rukia regards him out of the corner of her eye.
“Do you? Do you appreciate it?”
Renji frowns. “Yeah, of course I do. I know you don’t like it.”
Rukia stops walking and turns to him. “C’mere.” She gestures toward herself and makes the pointing motion she does when she wants him to bend down to her level. Even though this results in a cuff to the back of his head more often than not, Renji obeys. “If you really appreciate it, I think you should do something nice for me.”
Renji should know by now to be wary of such an ominous statement, but he falls for it anyway. “Sure. Name it.”
“I want to kiss you again.”
Renji tugs at his ponytail. “Again? Really?”
It was probably six years between the first and second time she had wanted to kiss him, but the second time had only been a few months ago, last spring, after he broke his arm saving her from a large, angry man she had attempted to pickpocket.
“You said you were open to the idea,” Rukia scowled.
“I...did,” Renji stammered. To be fair, he had been in immense pain at the time and probably would have agreed to just about anything. He could have used that as an excuse. It seemed like Rukia was thinking the same, he could tell she was already getting herself wound up to be hurt at his rejection. That stung a little, the idea that she expected so little of him. “No problem. Anything for you. Go for it.” He bent his knees a little deeper and squeezed his eyes shut, bracing for impact.
“You gotta relax a little, man, it’s not a punch in the nards,” Rukia scolded, grabbing ahold of his ears and laying one on him.
Renji didn’t fantasize about kissing girls. He liked girls well enough, but he liked guys more. There was one exception to that rule, and that was Rukia. He liked her more than anyone. It wasn’t right to fantasize about Rukia, though, in his opinion, because he lived with her and it wasn’t respectful and also… also, if he spent too much time thinking about things like kissing her, he might want to do it. So, he avoided the slippery slope of girls in general, and restricted his spicy kissing fantasies to the lean, knife-eyed Rukongai punks that hung out on street corners and had really sexy ways of saying “heeeeeey.” Renji was perpetually working on his “heeeeeeys.”
But Rukia was kissing him now, and it seemed equally disrespectful to pretend she wasn’t. Her lips were soft against his, and curious. Her fingers relaxed their painful grip on his ears and snuck around to rest on the back of his neck. She must have been keeping her hands in her sleeves, because they were warm, and they felt so good and this was good, this was so, so good and it occurred to Renji that maybe he was meant to kiss her back, she had never mentioned anything about--
“There, that wasn’t so bad, was it, Abarai?” Rukia was saying.
It was over.
Renji blew air out his cheeks. “Naw, it was fine. Ah, did you, uh… was it everything you hoped and dreamed?”
“It was okay,” she shrugged, but her eyes twinkled. She started walking again and Renji had to do a little skip and a jump to catch up. “Fujimaru’s probably home already. How come he didn’t come with you to pick me up?”
“Oh, there were extra crates today, so he’s working late. But we can have the rice ready and surprise him!”
“Mm, yes, that sounds nice,” Rukia agreed. She hummed a little as she walked. “Hey, Renji?”
“Yeah?”
“Back at the shop-- did you call me Ru? What was that?”
Renji made a face. “I dunno. I thought it was cute.” You’re cute, his brain added, and suddenly, he couldn’t unsee it. She was unbearably cute, wrapped up in her shawl, that little piece of hair hanging between her eyes, those beautiful eyes. “If you don’t like it, I’ll--”
“You’ve known me for nine years and you decide, just now, to give me a nickname?”
He shrugged. “Things can change, right? Even out here in the ass end of Rukongai?”
She regarded him for a moment. “It is cute. I will allow it, but only from you, and don’t do it around gross people like my greasy boss.”
“Yeah, no prob,” he agreed, squeezing his hands under his armpits. He had a bad feeling that they were in for a brutal winter this year.
“Hey!” Rukia said, and he realized she was holding out his hand to him. Gingerly, he took it, hoping she wouldn’t mind his own cold fingers. She didn’t seem to.
#renji's birthday 2k21#my writing#i was strongly tempted to do another chapter of the tattoo artist au on top of this#except that the next chapter doesn't even have renji in it#it has rukia and orihime TALKING ABOUT renji if that counts for anything#and then i ran out of time#i know i have posted an excerpt of this excerpt before i am sorry i just love it TOO MUCH
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sunnflower hot take >:)
okay, okay so. i know that sunnflower is a rly popular OMORI pairing, and don't get me wrong, i like it, too,,,, HOWEVER. here is a post-good ending headcanon that will smash all of ur sunnflower dreams into a million bits and pieces <3
[edit: just want to let anyone else who sees this post that it is 10000% okay to ship sunflower, and this whole post is purely a headcanon that’s been stewing in my brain since last month, and it is only my interpretation and my opinion !]
TW // suicide, anxiety, mental institutions, childhood trauma
Sunny and Basil *cannot* see each other
i have been up for 24 hours and don't know if anything i'm about to say will make sense, so bear with me. it's not uncommon for people who shared trauma to have intense reactions that manifest in their relationships with each other. some people become hyper-attached to each other after the traumatic event, while some people are the exact opposite, and if these people come into contact with each other, it can be extremely detrimental to their mental healths. the latter is how i see basil and sunny (especially basil).
throughout the game, a lot of their interactions come off as stiff and awkward not only because they haven't spoken in years, but also because basil is too emotionally dysregulated to keep up a conversation. he's stuttering, he's sweating--WE ALL SAW HIM. he is an anxious. wreck, and this anxiety directly stems from mari's death and sunny's presence. especially after kel breaks the news that sunny's moving away, we can see that any major changes sunny makes are going to heavily affect basil on a psychological level. this isn't just a problem with basil clinging to the last bit of familiarity in his life, but it would also affect sunny's personal growth if these patterns were to be perpetuated in any future relationship between the two, platonic or romantic. imagine trying to move on from the most traumatic experience of your life, and an old friend you haven't talked to in years, begs you to stay. it isn't healthy for either of them.
FURTHERMORE, in regards to the secret true ending with the special SunnFlower cutscene, i think that it's okay to say that these two are beginning the healing process and are working towards finding peace in their lives separately. this ending doesn't imply really anything other than a mutual understanding that everything they'd been holding onto for years had finally been released, and that they were now beginning their journey of recovery.
i don't think they talk for a long time after the good ending--i don't think they really want to. for sunny, basil is a painful reminder of not only the death of his sister, but also the incident that landed him in the hospital. you don't just automatically make amends with the person that gouged your eye out during a psychotic episode. i think that sunny understands and forgives, but i do not think he feels safe.
for basil, on the other hand, sunny is a reminder of the terrible thing he did to mari's body and also his abandonment issues he got from his absent parents. in my opinion, being the person who strung up your best friend's dead sister into a tree to make it look like a su*cide is worse than being the one who pushed her down the stairs. you can push someone on accident, but you definitely can't hang someone on accident. i imagine there's a lot of guilt in there mixed with a whole lot of other childhood trauma from his neglectful parents that is a cocktail for mental instability. (also would like to point out that basil having the idea to hang her up in the first place is an early sign of extreme mental illness,, that isn't normal and also hints at some kind of emotional codependency or unhealthy attachment he has to sunny.) the fact that basil was pushed so far that he had a psychotic episode which resulting in him stabbing his friend--which by the way was triggered by sunny's mere presence, not an immediate physical threat of any kind--is so telling of his mental state, and i honestly believe that best thing for him would be hospitalization. for a while. if he cannot be safe to himself and others, then he needs to begin his recovery in a rehabilitation center, and who knows when it would be safe for him to be discharged.
to put that last bit in perspective, i've been hospitalized before due to a pretty half ass attempt that i didn't follow through with because i was drunk out of my mind and that landed me five days. five days, and i didn't even do anything, like no physical harm came to me. also, during my time there, i was really adamant about how i was feeling better and said i had reduced SI which is also how i got out of there in that small amount of time. i have no idea how much time someone like basil would have to spend in an institution, but it would probably be more than a few weeks.
if seeing sunny was the final trigger that led up to basil's psychotic episode, then it is completely possible that seeing sunny would only bring up similar dysregulation problems in the future, even after he's well on his way to full recovery.
SO TL;DR
1. basil stakes his emotions too heavily on sunny,
2. for sunny, basil reminds him of his sister's death and incident that brought him to the hospital, leading him to feel unsafe around basil,
3. for basil, sunny reminds him of the guilt in shame of what he did to mari's body (which i think we can all universally agree is much worse than accidentally pushing her down the stairs),
4. sunny's presence pushed basil to a point where he was not safe to himself or others in an extreme manner that borders homicidal,
5. BASICALLY WHAT IM SAYING IS THAT THEY TRIGGER EACH OTHER AND WOULDN'T BE ABLE TO HANDLE HANGING OUT FOR EXTENDED PERIODS OF TIME BC OF THE PTSD AND POSSIBLE PSYCHOSIS
so yeah. there it is. if you made it this far, im so sorry.
#omori#sunnflower#omori sunny#omori basil#omori sunflower#omori headcanons#omori spoilers#omori game#omori anaylsis
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