#but also i would play devils advocate (if h could call it that?) and tell my pastors like

[potatoes-tomatoes]

this a bit late but I saw ur tags on that sp easter episode gifset "not my ass pulling a stan at the tender age of six" - I'm so curious what ur easter questioning origins were 👀

i was (…am?) a lil insane growing up, like ok, I have memories of telling everyone in my kindergarten class that santa wasn’t real and wouldn’t care if they cried, bc they HAD to know the truth like, how could santa deliver those gifts in one night? why does he only give gifts to kids in america/ with enough wealth? You can still love the specials, and the holiday, the characters of the santa mythos, but believing a lie told by adults just didn’t sit right with me. also bc my parents told me he wasn’t real lol. (listen. my mom grew up very very poor. My grandma told my tias and tio that Santa wasn’t real, and only existed for the gringos with money jfkfkfjf) so. yeah my religiously zealous ass is the preface for even more religiously zealous stuff

so I grew up as a conservative christian girl that read the bible like a storybook every night, but I also have memories of questioning everything, it drove everyone crazy. I would hound my pastors after service with new questions someone my age wouldn’t usually have? I knew they thought it was kinda annoying if not mildly cute but I needed answers for every goddamn thing. Easter traditions bein one of them 😅 Now, I was raised very traditionally, as in, we examined good friday and went to a long Easter service and then, that’s it. Eggs, Rabbits were worldly, and had nothing to do with Christ, and tbh the most my fam enjoyed was the after church carne asada and the trip to walmart the coming monday to get discounted candy to munch on thru summer lolol. But I asked my classmates and teachers at school like at what point did easter become abt eggs? so if you’re not christian then, what exactly are you celebrating? You’re just doing elaborate stuff to eat candy. what’s the true purpose of the bunny? where did this originate? and everyone was like, just paint ur damn plastic egg for class Cel, you’re 6. 😂😅

Well that’s done and over with and I’m completely sane now. Also I did not paint and properly prep my first easter egg and participate in an egg hunt until last year with some friends and it was cute lol.

[paraemu]

From Toei Hero MAX 57

Parad and Poppy were the main characters in the second part of the trilogy, which was the most flexible in terms of content. Kai and Matsuda's bugster team looks back on their activities in V-Cinema, which were in a sense the same as usual, or even more outrageous than usual!

A different kind of competition realized in a compilation trilogy

本作「仮面ライダーパラドクスwithポッピー」はタイトル通り、お二人が主役。初の大役を務められていかがでした？

Interviewer: As the title suggests, the two of you play the main roles in this film, "Kamen Rider ParaDX with Poppy". How was it for you to play your first major role?

僕の意識としては、ただパラドを演じただけなので、特別感は特にないんですよね。なんというか、これまで通り「エグゼイド」という作品で演じていたら、結果的にパラドが真ん中にいたって感じ。主役の自分がなんとかしなきや、みたいな気持ちもまったくなかったですからね。

Kai: As far as I'm concerned, I just played Parad, so I don't really have any special feeling. I was just playing the role of "Ex-Aid" as I always have, and as a result, Parad was right in the middle. I didn't feel like I had to do anything as the main character at all.

そうだよね。ずっとポッピーとパラドとして生活していたら、たまたまカメラがこっちを向いてて、いつのまにか作品になってた。感覚としてはそういう感じに近いような気がします(笑)。

Matsuda: That's right. We've been living as Poppy and Parad for a long time, and the camera just happened to be looking at me, and before I knew it, I was making art. I think that's how I feel about it (laughs).

申斐さんは、本作で新たに登場するブラックパラドとの一人ニ役にも挑戦されています。

Interviewer: Kai-san is also taking on the challenge of playing two roles with Black Parad, a new character in this work.

クランクインの当日とかはけっこう大変だった記憶がありますね。同じカッ��に2人とも映るシーンは、まずパラドで撮って、そのままカメラを固定して、ブラーックパラドに着替えてから、今度は反対側に立って…..というのをやらなきゃいけなくて。たぶん、あの日だけで4回ぐらいは入れかわったんじゃないかな。

Kai: I remember it was quite difficult on the day of the crank-in. For the scene where both of us are in the same shot, we had to shoot in Parad, hold the camera in place, change into Black Parad, and then stand on the other side of the screen and shoot... I had to do this. I think we probably switched around four times that day alone.

ブラックパラドは見た目がほとんど変わらないから難しそうだよね。ポッピーと明日那の場合は、見た目も声も喋る言葉尻も全然違うから、同じこと言ってても別人に見えるけど。

Matsuda: Black Parad is going to be difficult because he looks almost the same. In the case of Poppy and Asuna, they look, sound and speak very differently, so they look like different people even though they say the same things.

それはそうかも。演技だけでまったく違うキャラの人物に見せるというのがいかに難しいかは、今回初めて実感したかな。飛彩（瀬戸利樹）が劇場版 (「仮面ライダー×スーパー戦隊超スーパーヒーロー大戦」) で二役をやってた一ときも「大変そうだなぁ」と思って見てはいたけど (笑)。

Kai: That may be true. I think this is the first time I realized how difficult it is to make a character look completely different just by acting. When Seto Toshiki was playing two roles in the movie version ("Kamen Rider x Super Sentai: Chou Super Hero Taisen"), I thought "That looks like a lot of work." (laughs).

衣裳チェンジという部分では、"ポッピーの七変化" も本作の見どころのひとつですよね？

Interviewer: In terms of costume changes, the "seven changes of Poppy" is one of the highlights of the film, isn't it?

みなさんにそう言っていただくんですけど、私自身はこの1年半ずっとコスプレをしてきたようなものなので、コスプレをするってことに対する特別感がわりと携れちゃっていて.....。ちょっとバグってます (笑)。

Matsuda: That's what everyone tells me, but I've been cosplaying for the past year and a half, so my sense of specialness about cosplaying is rather gone... It's a little buggy (laughs).

もはやあれが私服と。

Kai: That's no longer what I call casual wear.

そうだね。ウェディングドレスも……おめでたい私服 (笑)。

Matsuda: That's right. The wedding dress is also... an outfit for special occasions (lol).

ヲタ芸もやってたよね？

Kai: You also did some wotagei, right?

やったねえ。鈴村監督から、着替えるたびに「ひと言なんか言って、なんかやって」って言われて、全部アドリブでやったんですけど、そのひとつがヲタ芸で (笑)。最初は「アイドルっぼいことを」ってオーダーだったんだけど、なんか違うことをしたかったから、監督と相談して「アイドルカルチャーとはこういうものだって勝手に勘違いしてるポッピー」という設定でやったんです。でも、ちょっと激しくやりすぎて、今回の「トリロジー」に携わってないスタッフさんのなかには別人がやってると思った人もいたみたいですけどね。

Matsuda: I did. Director Suzumura asked me to "say something, do something" every time I changed clothes, so I improvised everything, and one of the things I did was wotagei (laughs). At first the order was to do something idol-like, but we wanted to do something different, so we talked with the director and decided to do it as "Poppy, who mistakenly believes that this is what idol culture is all about". But it was a bit too intense, and some of the staff who weren't involved in the "Trilogy" seemed to think that someone else was doing it.

さすがにヲタ芸にまで吹き替えは使わないよね(笑)。アクションじゃないんだから。ってか、途中で「松田るか」も出てきてなかった？観てて「あれっ？ポッピー?」って思ったよ。

Kai: You're right, they don't use dubbing even for wotagei (laughs). It's not an action movie. I mean, didn't "Matsuda Ruka" appear in the middle of the movie? When I was watching it, I was like "Huh? Where's Poppy?"

出てたね。あそこは思わず素が出ちゃって....(笑)。

Matsuda: You were in it. I couldn't help but show my true colors there.... (laughs).

明かされる衝撃の真実そのとき演者たちは?

The Shocking Truth Revealed: What Will Happen to the Actors?

一方、今回のトリロジーではこれまで語られたことのなかった新たな過去も明かされます。

Interviewer: On the other hand, this trilogy will also reveal a new past that has never been told before.

ブラックパラドが何者か？というのもそうだし、ポッピーの一宿主である櫻子さんが顔出しするのも今回が初めてだよね。

Kai: Who is Black Parad? This is also the first time that Sakurako-san, Poppy's host, shows her face.

これがすごくキレイな人でね。なんでこの人はクロノス（＝檀正宗）みたいな人と結婚したんだろう、と改めて疑問に思いましたよ、私は。

Matsuda: She was a very beautiful woman. I wondered again why she married someone like Dan Masamune.

美人で俺もビックリした。こんな人からどうしたら黎斗ができるんだって��

Kai: She was so beautiful that I was surprised too. I wondered how such a person could give birth to Kuroto.

いや、クロノスと結婚したら黎斗は産まれちゃうよ (笑)。まあ、あったんでしょうね。きっとお父さんにもいいところが。

Matsuda: No, if you marry Cronus, Kuroto will be born (laughs). Well, there must've been a reason. I'm sure the father had his good points.

もとをただせば、正宗と櫻子さんが結婚したことが「エグゼイド」のすべての始まりだったということなんだよね。

Kai: To put it simply, Masamune and Sakurako's marriage was the beginning of all of "Ex-Aid."

どこに惚れたのかっていう最大の謎は、トリロジーでも結局謎のままだけど (笑)。

Matsuda: The biggest mystery of what made her fall in love with him remains a mystery even in the trilogy (laughs).

テレビシリーズでもあとから明かされた“新事実、はいくつかありましたが、演じる側としてはやはり戸惑いもありますか？

Interviewer: In the TV series, there were some new facts that were revealed later, but as a performer, did you feel confused?

ありますね。パラドに関して言えば、「最終的に人間の味方につく」という設定は、正直あとから知ったんで、「えっ？どうしよ!」とはなりました。最初のほうの取材とかでは、普通に「悪役のまま終わりたい」って答えてたぐらい、僕自身は悪役をまっとうするつもりでいましたから。

Kai: Yes, I did. To be honest, I didn't know Parad would end up on the side of the humans until later, so I thought "What? What should I do?". In the first interview, I said that I wanted to end up as a villain, and I was planning to play a villain until the end.

私も本編のほうで「私、黎斗の母親だったんだ！」って知ったときは衝撃だったな。あれを最初から知っていれば、たぶん接し方も変わってたはずなので、「教えといてよー」と思ったもん。

Matsuda: I was also shocked when I found out in the show that I was Kuroto's mother! If I had known that from the beginning, I probably would have treated him differently, so I thought, "Why didn't you tell me?"

でも、きっとそれがいいんだよね。知らずにいることでいつのまにか役作りをさせられてる。僕が人間側につくのを知ってたら、グラファイトとの距離感とかも絶対ヘンになってたと思うもん。急にそういう台本を渡されて、自分の感情が追いつかなくなるというのがパラドにとっても逆によかった。リアルに窮地に立たされてる感じがさ。

Kai: But I'm sure it's for the best. By being unaware of it, I'm somehow forced to create the role. If I had known that I was going to be on the human side, the distance between me and Graphite would have been weird for sure. It was good for Parad that he was suddenly given such a script and that his emotions couldn't keep up. He felt like he was in a real predicament.

東映さんの作品はそういうところがあるみたいだもんね (笑)。『シンケンジャー』のときも、松坂桃李さん自身は「実は影武者」という設定をギリギリまで知らされてなかったんだって。演じるほうとしては最初から言っててほしいけど、そのあたりが難しさであり、面白さでもあるのかなって。

Matsuda: That seems to be the case with Toei's films (laughs). For "Shinkenger," Tori Matsuzaka himself wasn't told that he was actually a shadow warrior until the very last minute. As a performer, I wish I would have been told from the beginning, but I think that's both the difficulty and the fun of it.

そうだね。パラドが永夢に感染したバクスターだというのも最初は僕だけが知ってて、飯島くん本人は実際教えてもらってなかったし……。永夢の瞳が赤くなったときは絶対パラドが近くにいるとか、そういう匂わせはたくさんあったけど。

Kai: That's right. At first, I was the only one who knew that Parad was the Bugster who infected Emu, and Iijima-kun himself wasn't told about it. There were a lot of hints that Parad was definitely nearby when Emu's eyes turned red.

うんうん。だから「エグゼイド」も2ラウンド目が面白いんだよね。いろいろわかったうえで観ると、「そういうことか！」ってさらに楽しめるし。

Matsuda: Yeah, yeah. That's why the second half of "Ex-Aid" is so interesting, isn't it? If you watch it after you understand everything, you can enjoy it even more.

信頼しあえる関係性

A relationship of mutual trust

トリロジー全作を手がける鈴村監督の現場はどうでした？

Interviewer: How was it working with director Suzumura, who is working on the entire trilogy?

かなり自由にやらせてもら雰囲気でやれたかなってえましたね。 監督自身がすごく柔らかくて器の大きい方だから、周りも切羽詰まったりせずに、いい雰囲気でやれたかなって。

Kai: The director himself is very soft and big-hearted, so the people around him didn't feel pressured, and we were able to do it in a good atmosphere.

うん。よくご飯にも誘ってくれたしね。監督がそうやって気さくに接してくれるからこそ、距離感もほどよく縮まって、現場でも「コレ、こうしたいんです」って気負わずに言える空気感ができてた感じ。私のなかではすっかり焼酎ばかり飲んでる人というイメージだったりもしますけど (笑)。

Matsuda: Yeah. He often invited me out to dinner, too. Because the director was so open with me, we were able to close the distance between us, and I felt like I could say, "This is what I want to do," without feeling self-conscious. In my mind, he has the image of someone who drinks only shochu (laughs).

演出プランは当然、監督のなかにもあるはずなのに��芝居をつけてる段階で僕らが別のアイデアを出すと、決まって「じゃあ、そうしようよ」って言ってくれる。そうやって積極的に採用してもらえたら、こっちも一生懸命考えようって気持ちになるし、それはすごくよかったなって思います。自分の発想力みたいなものも否応なしに鍛えられましたしね。

Kai: Naturally, the director has a plan for the direction of the film, but when we came up with a different idea during the play, he would always say, "Well, let's do that". I think it's great that the director is willing to adopt our ideas, because it encourages us to think harder. I think that was really good. I was also able to develop my ability to think out of the box.

しかも、周りにはずっと一緒に走ってこられた同世代の役者陣。もはや鬼に金棒ですね。

Interviewer: In addition, he was surrounded by actors of the same generation who had been running together for a long time. It's like the devil's advocate.

みんな、ホントに仲よかったよね。人数が多いと自然とグルーブに分かれたりもしがちですけど、「エグゼイド」に関してはそういうこともまったくなくて。

Matsuda: We all get along really well. When there are a lot of people in a group, it tends to naturally divide into different groups, but that didn't happen at all with "Ex-Aid".

うん。個人的にも、みんなで笑い合えて、楽しく仕事ができる現場が一番いい。そういう意味でも、オンとオフのメリハリがつけられるメンバーばかりだったのはよかったなって。

Kai: Yeah. Personally, I think it's best to work in a place where everyone can laugh together and have fun. In that sense, I'm glad that all the members were able to have a good balance between on and off work.

お二人の信頼関係は？

Interviewer: How is the relationship of trust between the two of you?

バッチリですよ。私が右なら、彼は左に行くので (笑)。

Matsuda: It's perfect. If I go right, he goes left (laughs).

そうかな？でも、確かに違うことをしたがるかも。同じ方向向いてって言われても、素直にできないし (笑)。というか、そっちも "おしゃべりクソマシンガン" って言われてたじゃん。

Kai: Is that so? But I think we may want to do different things. Even if you ask me to look in the same direction, I can't do it honestly (laughs). I mean, you've been called a "shitty talking machine gun" too.

"クソ" じゃないよ、"サブ" だよ (笑)。なんだろ？私がバーッとひとしきり喋って、横から彼一がポロッと鋭いことを言うみたいな、そういう流れは現場でもありましたね。

Matsuda: It's not "shitty", it's "sub." (laughs) What is it? There were times when I would talk a lot, and then he would say something sharp from the side.

でも、おかしいことは言ってなかったでしょ？ちゃんと事実を言ってただけで。

Kai: But I didn't say anything funny, did I? I was just telling the truth.

大人はみんな知らんぶりして目を課るようなことをあえて言うんですよ、彼は。

Matsuda: He dares to say things that all adults pretend not to know and avert their eyes on.

そういうのすごい嫌いなの。日本人はなんですぐ "付度" するのかなって思っちゃう。あんな言葉、英語にはないからね?

Kai: I really dislike that kind of thing. I wonder why Japanese people are so quick to use "tsukedo". There is no such word in English, right?

はいはい (笑)。

Matsuda: Yes, yes (laughs).

では、お二人の関係性が十分伝わったところで、これから作品を観る読者にメッセージを。

Interviewer: Now that we have a good sense of the relationship between the two of you, do you have a message for the readers who will be watching the film?

夕陽に照らされたパラドクスとポッピーのポスタービジュアルを鵜呑みにすると痛い目を見ますってことは言っておきたいかな。

Matsuda: I guess I'd like to say that if you believe the poster visual of Parad and Poppy in the evening sun, you're in for a world of hurt.

あれはちょっと、謎のタイタニック感があるからね。

Kai: That one has a bit of a mysterious Titanic feel to it.

二人が出るってことしか合ってない (笑)。ただ、「ブレイブ＆スナイプ」も「ゲンムVSレーザー」もわりと重いし、「パラドクスwithポッピー」は箸休め回だと思って身構えずに観てほしいな、とは思うよね。

Matsuda: The only thing that fits is that the two of them are in it (laughs). However, both "Brave and Snipe" and "Genm vs. Lazer" are rather heavy, so I hope people will think of "ParaDX with Poppy" as a chopstick rest and watch it without getting defensive.

そうだね。3部作だと1本目は掴んで3本目は落とさなきゃいけないけど、それがない2本目は何でもできる。そういう自由度の高さはよかったよね。

Kai: Yes, in a trilogy, you have to grab the first one and drop the third one, but in the second one you can do anything. It was nice to have that kind of freedom, wasn't it?

監督のフェティシズムも一番詰まってる作品だしね (笑)。

Matsuda: It's also the film that contains the most of the director's fetishism (laughs).

ちなみに、パラドとポッピーを演じてきて、ー番「心が躍るな」と思った瞬間は？

Interviewer: By the way, what was the most "exciting" moment for you while playing Parad and Poppy?

うーん。たくさんありすぎてひとつには紋れないですね。今回で言えば、ポッピーじゃなく「松田るか」として主題歌を唄わせてもらえたのは「躍った」かな。

Matsuda: Hmmm. There are so many that I can't pick just one. In this case, I was able to sing the theme song not as Poppy, but as Matsuda Ruka, and I think that made me "jump".

僕は初めてナパームを見たときかな。あの大爆発には童心が騒ぎましたね。あと、これは余談ですけど、僕、クランクアップのときに現場に放置されたんです。

Kai: I think it was the first time I saw napalm. That huge explosion made me feel like a child. Also, this is an aside, but I was left unattended at the scene when the filming had wrapped up.

置いてかれてた (笑)。

Matsuda: You were left behind (laughs).

花束をもらって、せっかくだからって自撮りをしていて、「よし帰ろう」と外に出たらロケバスがもう出ていて…..。1年半を演じ終えた役者に対する「心震える」仕打ちとして、このことはぜひとも太字にして語り継がれてほしいと思います (笑)。

Kai: I got a bouquet of flowers and was taking selfies for the occasion, and when I went outside to go home, the location bus had already left... I hope this will be bolded and passed down as a "heart-breaking" treatment to the actors after a year and a half of acting (laughs).From Toei Hero MAX 57

[chemiste]

Voicemail. ~part 2~

a/n : you want it? go get it! heres the second part to voicemail!! I’m thinking a 3rd and final part for this??? if y’all want it tell me! ALSO I’ve linked what the reader is wearing and maybe what others are too so if you see a link thats what it is. also wanted to say thank you so much for the support on this one shot!! i would put those big eye emojis but im typing on a laptop and i dont think O.O is the same....

first part!!!! go read

mah masterlist

“Next on the red carpet is singer/song writer Y/N L/N, wow look at that beautiful dress!! This year at the Grammys she is up for 3 awards, Song of the Year, Best Dance Recording, and Best Solo Pop Artist!” 

The interviewer exclaimed excitedly from her podium along side the paparazzi wall. It had been a week since the songs were let out for the world and so there was definitely an electricity in the air at the awards ceremony.

“All you fans are probably watching for the most anticipated performances of tonight! Harry Styles will be singing one of his new songs from his album FineLine! Twitter is going ballistic from the recently leaked songs about is break up with L/N, we all know the cameras will be on her tonight whenever he’s mentioned! Oh look, here she comes now!”

You walked over in your beautiful award dress, safe to say you were the best dress star there. Your hair was done up and the red long dress seemed to flow around you effortlessly as you walked. 

“Hello Diane, it’s lovely to see you again.” 

You said in a polite voice, smiling to her and the camera, she handed you an extra mic, ready to drown you with questions.

“I’m going to cut to the chase— did you listen to the songs?”

Wow, this lady’s cut throat I’ll give her that.

“Oh yes! I’ve listened to all the albums nominated this year and I’m so excited.”

“Oh I was talking about—“

“I’m so incredibly grateful for the nominations, I put my blood, sweat, and tears into this album and I’m glad the fans love it as much as I do.”

You could see the Diane deflate a little, understanding you’d keep dodging questions about Harry until it was over so she moved on. 

“Yes, you’re nominated for Best Dance Recording, the music video for your song Clouds was crazy! How long did it take you to figure out how to dance while flying?!” 

You laughed, thinking back to the many rehearsals of choreography on the ground and then being connected to cables and hoisted into the air to perform it. 

“A girl never tells her secrets,” you said with a wink. 

“Well speaking of flying in a music video, I know one performance tonight will be—“

Cheers and hysteric screaming filled the fan area as someone came on to the carpet. 

“Is that? Oh look, Harry Styles enters the stage in a—, my goodness! You and him are matching!”

You couldn’t believe it.

Harry was decked out in a full red suit, hair beautifully fluffed and glimmering in the light. He had red heels that looked like Dorthy’s slippers.

And he had the faintest amount of red lipstick on, making him look like an ethereal being in red.

“Wow, we really are matching.” 

You mumbled to yourself, half forgetting you were being filmed. 

You turned back to the camera the moment you remembered, making your face emotionless so hopefully the interviewer wouldn’t pick up on your thoughts at the moment. 

You quickly thanked her and slipped off into the sea of celebrities, hearing his voice ‘hello love! So happy you could come’ to the fans hoping he would give them a signature.

You entered the award room, looking for your assigned seat. Luckily you were strangely one of the only people in there aside from a few techies working on the stage lights.

“Lady Gaga, Taylor Swift, Selena Gomez, Billie Elish, Kahild… Harry….” 

You gasped, basically scoffing at what you saw next. 

“Y/N L/N? Are you fucking kidding me?!” 

You started to breathe a little faster, “Oh god, I don’t think I can do a whole ceremony next to him, after the whole thing online… and not responding to his texts.”

It’s true, when he had texted you that morning, it took you 5 hours and a shot of tequila to actually open his messages.

Bastard (wasn’t allowed to block, fuck PR)

Hey… I don’t know if you’ve gotten a call from one of your PR people yet but, I just wanted you to know I didn’t mean for any of this to happen, I don’t wish to put you through anymore than what I already have…

Bastard (wasn’t allowed to block, fuck PR)

Um, but uh, if you’ve listened to the songs, just know that I really do mean the words I sang. I wish we could have, uh talked, but I understand I’m not in any position to ask for that. Just, there were a few others songs that didn’t get leaked, and uh, I’d like you to have them. You don’t have to listen to them but, it would mean a lot to me if you did.

Bastard (wasn’t allowed to block, fuck PR)

“Mrs. Styles.”M4A. Click to open.

Bastard (wasn’t allowed to block, fuck PR)

“I Should Have Fought.”M4A. Click to open.

Bastard (wasn’t allowed to block, fuck PR)

“I’m Sorry.”M4A. Click to open.

You didn’t listen to them, like the others. 

You just… couldn’t. 

It had taken you so long to get over him and grind it into your head that you didn’t do anything wrong, he did. 

Your PR team decided the best thing to do was acted like nothing had happened because if you didn’t give a response the public would have nothing to go off of, so here you were, looking at one of the scheming ideas from someone on the Award Team to see if they’d be the first to get some action between the two of you.

“Fuck that.” 

You said to yourself, looking around to make sure no one was looking, you snatched your name paper and walked about 15 seats over and changed with Lana Del Ray. 

Because you were all in the front row, you couldn’t get farther than that, but this would have to do. You quickly put Lana’s paper in your previous seat and walked out of the room, escaping the ‘crime scene’.

At least I’m sitting next to Shawn now.

You and Shawn had gotten to be friends around a year ago when you bumped into him at the recording studio and....maybe spilled your marshmallow milkshake down his shirt.

“I’m so fuckin sorry! Oh god please don’t sue me for this, or worst, tell your fans!!” 

You rambled, padding him off with the napkins from your fast food bag. You looked up at the tall Canadian in front of you that just had a smile on his face.

 “Hey don’t worry about it, uh, I’m Shawn but I guess you already knew that.” 

“Yeah, I’ve been listening to your music for a while its fantastic, I’m—“ 

“Y/N L/N, America’s Favorite Child and Feminist thats not faired to fuck you up?” 

You grinned, “Oh you saw that video?” 

He laughed, “Hell ya I did, You punching that old misogynist groping that girl on the street is one of the videos saved on my phone!”

After that day, you both caught on like a house on fire since you seemed to be in the studio at the same time, it was great having someone to throw ideas around with at 3am when everyone else had left the studio.

“Y/N! Girl! I haven’t seen you in forever!” 

You looked up from the corner of the red carpet you had been hiding standing in. Hailee Steinfeld made her way over to you in a black dress that hugged her perfectly. 

You let out a sigh of relief, you gave her a big hug, breathing in her sweet perfume. 

“Hailee you’re a life savor, I feel so out of it here.” 

She gave you a soft look, “Cause he’s here right?”

You clinched your jaw, “And we’re fucking matching! How did that even happen? It’s literally the same shade of my dress and everything! There are so many shades his team could have chose but they went with that one! And the lipstick! He’s basically a devil personified! But he’s got style!”

You quietly rambled to your fellow singer, she squeezed your hand when the bell chimed telling everyone it was time to enter. 

“Y/N, before we go in I wanted to ask if you had listened to the songs.” 

“Uh, no… I… I couldn’t hear his voice staying those things to me so I just read the lyrics.” 

Hailee gave your bare shoulder a squeeze, “Well, I don’t want to play devil’s advocate,” you smiled at her little quip, “but I did, and what’s not in the lyrics just written is the emotion you could hear in his voice. During Drunk Thoughts, theres a part that people are speculating he’s crying while recording, trying force sing it out and, it’s just, I think it’s time you spoke to him.”

Hailee was one of your most trusted friends and to hear her say this, wasn’t surprising.

You were starting to think it too.

“But, I’m scared H, what if makes it worse?”

The final bell chimed and you both started to walk inside. “I have a feeling it won’t."

                                                        ........

“What an incredible performance by Ariana Grande, next up is the show we’ve all been waiting for, or well I’ve been waiting for, here’s Harry Styles performing a new song from his nominated Album, FineLine!” 

James Corden announced from the side aisle. You felt Shawn subtly queen your hand, knowing there was bound to be a camera on you the whole time while Harry sang.

You took a deep breath,

No facials.

No twitching.

Calm.

The curtain came up from the stage, the set was a back cube cut diagonally so the audience could see the inside. 

Harry stood in a white suit sans a shirt. He wasn’t wearing shoes so you could see the painted red toe nails peeking out from underneath the too long suit pants. 

His hair had been messed with a bit, giving it a soft and fluffy just out of bed look.

Now he looks like an angel.

He held a red mic in his hand, and spoke into it.

“Before we start, I’d like to inform you that I will be singing an unreleased song not from my album called.”

He took a breath.

"Red.”

You curled your toes in your heels the only way you’d be allowed to release the tension you felt in your body since they were covered by your dress.

Fuck, that’s why we match.

A piano started playing, a sort of dark melody that reverberated through your bones and into your soul.

It’s all I can see,

It’s all I can hear,

The sound is loud,

But it’s not clear.

The tone of your voice,

Plays in my head,

That look in your eyes,

I can tell you want me dead.

Grays are the only color I see,

Black and white and in between.

But then I saw you in that dress.

The color of blood always suited you the best.

You and your red dress.

You and your red…… dress.

Thoughts swirl around, in my mind.

Pretty eyes and satin clothes,

They plagues my dreams, in the night.

Grays are the only color I see,

Black and white and in between.

But then I saw you in that dress.

The color of blood always suited you the best.

You and your red dress.

You and your red…… dress.

You watched as he struggled to hold back the emotion in his voice, you sucked in a small breathe when his eyes made contact with yours, unwavering.

Oh… I wish could take it back.

Oh… I wish I could take it back.

Oh… I wish could take it back.

Oh… I wish I could take it back.

You and your red dress.

You and your red…… dress.

You and your red dress.

You and your red…… dress.

The song ended and the audience was silent.

 Everyone could feel the tension in the room, so you did the only you could do.

You stood and started to clap.

Shawn and Hailee immediately followed your cue and soon the rest of the auditorium was erupting with cheers and roars of excitement.

But all you could focus on was the smile on his face, looking down at you.

And the one forming on yours too.

<3

3rd part right here!

alsoooo i’d like to say a big wtf to people that white wash reader inserts! it’s so damn easy to just put a little colleague together like i did and add it so everyone can envision themselves and like,,, need a hairstyle? literally say ‘you did your favorite hairstyle’ thats perfect and a neutral way to keep everyone happy!!! people that bitch about going the extra mile are worthless writers smh

[krakenbait]

kraken bait 3: the moment of truth

the moment is finally upon us! no, not the actual expansion draft, that’s in 10 days. i mean my last (but best) installment of the kraken bait expansion draft theories! 

this has been a long, long work in progress, basically since i posted the last one. i’ve asked nearly every hockey fan i know, as well as randomly messaging several friends and cool people on hockeyblr, for their ideas and opinions on their favorite team’s expansion draft situation. and as with my previous lists, i had my friend and capfriendly consultant corwin (@chaos-hockey) collaborating with me to make this semi-reasonable (largely against their wishes). i’ll be including commentary from myself and my variety of sources with each pick. 

for reference, this is a somewhat plausible look at who seattle might take in the expansion draft. it’s not a prediction, because even i don’t honestly think the kraken will take some of these players, but it’s a fun simulation. it does follow expansion draft rules, and even comes under the cap (which took some last-minute finagling by me and corwin).

without further ado, let’s get into it! this list got long, so it’s all under the cut.

Anaheim Ducks: Haydn Fleury

this one comes straight from resident danton heinen fan, ergo ducks fan @dantonheinens, so thanks for your help casey! they sent me a very detailed explanation of anaheim’s expansion draft situation basically explaining that there’s a whole lot of “ands, ifs, or buts” with the ducks, but if fleury is exposed, he’s a slam dunk (slam duck? i’m sorry)

Arizona Coyotes: Christian Fischer

the one thing i know about this dude is he got wrecked in a fight with nathan mackinnon in the 2020 playoffs. this is the first of several picks on this list i borrowed from The Athletic’s mock expansion drafts, which happens if i don’t know the team and i don’t know anyone else who does. corwin and i also considered taking adin hill from the yotes, but we decided on some other goalies instead (stay tuned).

Boston Bruins: Jeremy Lauzon

i have a lot of friends who are bruins fans, so credits are owed to: corwin, casey again, alex (@patron-saint-of-boston-hockey) & luna (@kureally) & any other bruins fans in the nwhl discord, and my irl bruins friends. i got a lot of opinions on the bruins pick, including jake debrusk, jakub zboril, connor clifton, and trent frederic. but the one name almost everyone could agree on was lauzon. therefore, i’ve decided he’s headed to seattle. 

(it feels worth it to mention that at the prospect of having to take someone from the bruins, corwin said “curses be upon your name!” in an aggressively thick boston accent)

Buffalo Sabres: Rasmus Asplund

i could not tell you who this is, other than the fact that he’s one of buffalo’s three rasmuses (rasmi?). corwin and i had also talked about maybe putting anders bjork here, like i did in the last go-around, but i defaulted to The Athletic this time, and they thought asplund was a good pick, so here we are.

Calgary Flames: Mark Giordano

another pick borrowed from The Athletic, but i’ve seen predictions of giordano to the kraken a fair amount. it just seems right (and a whole lot better than corwin’s proposition of matthew tkachuk from last round).

Carolina Hurricanes: Brady Skjei

this one comes from the lovely @summerteukka, so thank you kinga! she gave me a very good rundown on the canes and the expansion draft, with the conclusion being the canes have so much defensive depth that it’s definitely going to be a defenseman, and especially if they resign dougie hamilton, skjei seems to be a likely choice. i’m all for it- we’ll have “an S and a K and a J all next to each other” on a kraken jersey.

Chicago: Adam Gaudette

similarly to the arizona pick, corwin and i considered a goalie here- in this case, it would have been malcolm subban. but he is not one of the goalies we ended up going for. instead, we opted on bringing micaela gaudette and her husband back to the pacific northwest. 

Colorado Avalanche: Ryan Graves

this is really a no-brainer. gravy is a good defenseman, but the avs have such a strong defense between cale makar, devon toews, and sam girard (and you could add erik johnson when he’s healthy), plus up-and-comers like bo byram. gravy will almost definitely be exposed, and i think he’s a great pick for seattle. plus it’s relatively painless for avs fans who also will like seattle (like yours truly).

(corwin also wanted me to mention that they want gravy traded to the bruins so he can play with curtis hall, who is basically “color-swapped ryan graves”)

Columbus Blue Jackets: Dean Kukan

another pick taken right from The Athletic. i do not know who this is, but he’s a defenseman and the writers liked this pick so i went with it. for the record, corwin really wanted this pick to be boone jenner because he has a funky name, but i wanted another defenseman, so the fun name was sacrificed for function.

Dallas Stars: Jason Dickinson

i don’t really have an explanation for this one. corwin and i were talking about the stars options and picking dickinson just felt right.

Detroit Red Wings: Vladislav Namestnikov

thanks are owed here to joce (@doubleminor) for her red wings expertise! she gave me a few players who were likely kraken bait and i picked from there. it came down to evgeny svechnikov and vladislav namestnikov, but i went with namestnikov in the end. he was with the avs for a brief period and i liked him then, plus the vibes just seem right, so here we are.

Edmonton Oilers: Tyson Barrie

really, tyson barrie was the player who started the whole kraken bait thing. corwin made the drawing, i made the first list, and the rest is history. do i actually think tyson will be going to the kraken in a week? not really. do i still really like the idea of it? 100%. therefore, i will continue to engage in my “tyson barrie to seattle” nonsense.

Florida Panthers: Chris Driedger

oh look, our first goalie! florida had some interesting skater options, but when it came down to it, corwin and i thought the cats were a good place to take a goalie from. driedger did pretty well this season, plus the panthers’ goalie situation is locked up between $10 million man bobrovsky and future star spencer knight.

Los Angeles Kings: Viktor Arvidsson

corwin was feeling pretty strong about this one, so i’m trusting their judgement. according to them, seattle expressed interest in arvidsson, so nashville traded him to the kings instead of giving him up for nothing. now the kings get to give him up for nothing, which works out pretty well, considering i had absolutely no clue who to pick from the kings. 

Minnesota Wild: Matt Dumba

like some other picks, this just seems right. i like matt dumba a lot. he seems like a fun and wholesome guy, and his activism, both on his own and with the hockey diversity alliance, is admirable. i hope he gets to display his personality and keep working to better the sport of hockey with the kraken.

Montreal Canadiens: Jake Allen

goalie number two! picking a player from the habs was weird because i got attached to them during the playoffs, but i really don’t know many of their players? so corwin and i deliberated on this a little, and after looking at our goalie situation, decided that allen was the right pick from montreal. 

Nashville Predators: Calle Jarnkrok

after doing art for and getting a featured article from the preds, corwin thinks they’re some kind of nashville expert. i originally had matt duchene here, but corwin said not him. their logic? they did art of duchene for their preds project, so they probably want to keep him around. fair point. so we went with calle jarnkrok. the logic behind that choice was simple: “calle jarn-kraken”

New Jersey Devils: Andreas Johnsson

i wish i kept a counter of how many times corwin told me “ron francis doesn’t care about your feelings!” when we were discussing the devils pick. they kept advocating for either nate bastian or mikey mcleod, but i would not stand for the superbuddies being separated. this is my kraken bait list, so my decisions. i asked a few of my devils friends for their input (props to sabs @jakejuentzel and h @bigmouthnatebastian), and in between the mild panic, andreas johnsson got tossed out. therefore, it’s mango getting shipped to seattle. does it further lower the average age of the devils? yeah, but it’ll be fine! the nhl could use some youthful chaos.

New York Islanders: Jordan Eberle

all of my kraken bait ideas for the isles came from the bardown breakdown podcast (a great listen if you like hockey and pop-punk/punk music!), since both hosts are isles fans. they had a few names tossed out, including josh bailey and casey cizikas, but corwin and i decided on eberle. like with a lot of these, right vibes.

New York Rangers: Kevin Rooney

i’ve seen two names pretty consistently for rangers kraken bait: colin blackwell and kevin rooney. is blackwell is better and therefore the more likely pick? yes. but kevin rooney is a former devil and also mocked tom wilson, so i voted he gets to go seattle.

Ottawa Senators: Chris Tierney

i don’t think i could name more than three, maybe four players on the sens, so i defaulted to The Athletic on this one. i have no idea who chris tierney is, but it works, so there we go.

Philadelphia Flyers: James Van Riemsdyk

@phillyjoel left some fantastic notes on the flyers kraken bait in the tags of my last list, giving me good evidence to tell corwin that for the last time, nolan patrick is not kraken bait. the argument i saw was that the flyers are probably going to trade patrick instead of giving him up for nothing and make cap space by giving away van riemsdyk or voracek. The Athletic liked the van riemsdyk pick, and corwin could live with it, so that’s where we settled.

Pittsburgh Penguins: Zach Aston-Reese

i honestly don’t have a whole lot of explanation for this one. another pick borrowed from The Athletic, corwin and i liked it, there we go. we considered going with kris letang, but the vibes weren’t right.

San Jose Sharks: Ryan Donato

shoutout to my sharks friend and amazing artist K (@18minutemajor) for their help! i originally had brent burns in this slot, on K’s suggestion (we had a fantastic exchange about brent burns befriending bigfoot). however, i ran into last-minute cap trouble and had to switch the pick. ryan donato came from The Athletic, but i think it’s kind of a fun pick. he’s been passed between a few teams recently, but most of what i know of ryan donato comes from the 2018 olympics (aka the first time i really watched hockey!), when he was apparently doing pretty well for team usa. 

St. Louis Blues: Vince Dunn

thank you @powerblais (and the blues fans group chat) for your input on this one! vince dunn was one of the names on the list erin sent me, and The Athletic also had him listed, so we went with it. 

Tampa Bay Lightning: Blake Coleman

thanks @heddy for responding to my out-of-the-blue message with some good input on the bolts! ana gave me some good suggestions like tyler johnson plus something else so they take on the contract, alex killorn, and ondrej palat. in the end, this devils fan defaulted to pickles. this pick is in the same category as tyson barrie- do i actually think coleman is going to the kraken? not really. do i still like the idea? absolutely.

Toronto Maple Leafs: Travis Dermott

borrowed from The Athletic and some other kraken bait predictions, because everyone has something to say about the leafs. corwin and i waffled between dermott and alexander kerfoot for this pick, but we eventually settled on dermott to seattle.

Vancouver Canucks: Madison Bowey

this pick changed so much in just one day. we originally had braden holtby here because original kraken bait, but then i ran into cap trouble. so i switched it to zack macewen, following a pick by The Athletic. but then i wanted one or two more defensemen, so i switched to madison bowey, who was the other pick from The Athletic. after all that, it seems like the right pick.

Washington Capitals: Vitek Vanecek

our third and final goalie! corwin and i had our eyes on vanecek as kraken bait for a while- a young goalie with promise and room to improve seemed like the right pick for seattle. we briefly considered tj oshie--he’s from washington state, and corwin wanted to upset caps fans (we were talking during the first round of the playoffs)--but ended up back with vanecek as our pick.

Winnipeg Jets: Mason Appleton

last pick of the list! not much to say here, though. it’s a pick borrowed from The Athletic, but we went with him over the other option from the jets because he has a fun name. to quote corwin, mason appleton sounds like “an apple pie in a mason jar on skates.”

and there you have it folks, the final kraken bait list! if you want to know the specifics, we’ve got 3 goalies, 16 forwards, and 11 defensemen, and the total cap hit is 76.4M. i’m pretty doubtful that this will be the actual expansion draft lineup, but we’ll have to see how many, if any, picks corwin and i got right. 

thanks again to everyone who helped me out, and i hope you enjoyed the chaos and commentary of the kraken bait lists!

[deadcactuswalking]

REVIEWING THE CHARTS 2020: BRIT AWARDS SPECIAL

So, welcome to... a Tuesday? Yeah, it’s not exactly a usual time for me to post on this blog but it’s not just your everyday episode of REVIEWING THE CHARTS – That’s right, it’s the 40th ceremony in the annual BRIT Awards celebration, where we – or at least ITV – commemorate the greatest in British pop music. I’ll be celebrating in full force this year, but not by tweeting manically like I did last year – well, there will still be some tweeting; follow me @cactusinthebank – but instead by writing my live commentary right here. I did this a couple years back so I figured I’d bring it back again in traditional, over-analytical, unnecessarily nitpicky fashion. I’ve got an Excel document like I had last year to make not of who wins and compare it to who I think should win. I’m all prepared – it’s time for the 2020 BRIT Awards... unfortunately hosted by Jack Whitehall.

COMMENTARY

Interestingly (This is 10 minutes before the show begins), the International Group Award, Best British Video, Outstanding Contribution to Music and Global Success Awards have been abolished, and British Breakthrough Act, Critics’ Choice Award and British Single of the Year have all been renamed. Also, the BRITs caught flack for less female artists being nominated although last year there was a record amount nominated so I feel like sexism claims can’t really ring all that true in my opinion. It does often seem like male artists have dominated that year of pop music, just as it feel female artists have the previous year, and the BRITs have noticed that, so it just feels a tad lop-sided towards the males this year. I’m playing Devil’s advocate, sure, and I wouldn’t say 2019 has been a bad year for British women in music, but I am able to somewhat defend this decision. I feel like I’d just say that as a little pre-amble. In fact, I’ll add this: this will be less formal and grammatically correct than a normal RTC episode, and perhaps a bit less wholesome or family-friendly. Also, if none of this makes any sense, that’s because it’s out of context completely, and this will make absolutely no sense unless you’re watching it with me or had watched it prior to reading this, but that’s the joy in this! Scorecard at the ready, 19:58, it’s the BRITs in two minutes, and I am prepared to make fun of every issue I pick out.

Jack Whitehall is so unfunny lol Like Haha She Is Cleaning Lizzo Flute But He Look Like Masturbate Ha Ha

I feel like they did not know what they should do for this year

The intro with him trying out iconic BRIT Awards outfits is kinda cool actually

I wonder how far into the future they plan for these. Like are these skits pre-recorded by three months or so

Mabel didn’t really hit that note huh

I won’t really be paying attention to this one because I’m filling out scorecard and all to update it for this year but Mabel is less energetic than she was on the Graham Norton Show months ago

Can’t tell if Don’t Call Me Up has soured on me a lot or this is just a bad performance. Probably the latter

Is this the vocal loop from Mad Love or something I don’t recognise it

Nevermind I’m so dumb it’s from Don’t Call Me Up

The telephone on the screen Because Ha Ha She Says Call Me Up is a bit on the nose

I don’t think they realise she also has a song called Ring Ring

“Please welcome your host Jack Whitehall” No go away

Audience did not like the Boris Johnson joke or even the Chris Martin one lol this gnarly dude is BOMBING

Rod Stewart has eight children what the f

“Horny scarecrow of rock and roll Ronnie Wood” I hope that is on his CV

“A bit of witty banter from Dave” Jack Whitehall Shouted Out The TV Channel Dave

Lewis Capaldi – Someone You Loved genuinely makes me want to eat a living frog this live version is better though he’s not straining that much

I saw a BBC News piece on a boy with cancer and this was used in the background and I understand it’s a sad, sappy piano ballad but it’s literally just about a break up like that’s a tad unfitting and kinda undermines the illness and tragedy surely

Niall Horan looks SO infused

The production value for these little transitions seems to have improved it actually looks cool and not dated garbage

Lewis Capaldi will win Best New Artist

Lewis Capaldi won Best New Artist

It’s his first BRIT Award but what’s the point in celebrating he’s gonna win like seven more

Dude is coming up to the stage with a bottle of beer in his hand bruh

I bet this dude is going to be the Adele and just get drunk and swear every time he gets an award

He hugged Niall Horan for a concerning amount of time

The audience chanted ‘DOWN IT DOWN IT’ he did not down it

He just shouted profanities into the mic after 40 seconds of delaying it, but the audio was muted so I have no idea why Jack Whitehall Loves This Man

Lewis Capaldi’s music and personality clash so hard like I saw an advert of this man making funny faces set to Someone You Loved and it was so odd

That advert played right after the BRITs by the way lol

Why is Lewis Capaldi on another advert singing Someone You Loved again like stop stop stop pelase i ccant getsv awytsuavforrnjeofityre

JHE’S BACK FOR ANOTHER ADVERT GO AWAY YOU DRUNKEN IDIOT

Why would Mastercard proudly sponsor this sh

How the hell is FKA twigs nominated for best female artist like cool and all her album was good but Huh

I guess they put one alternate win each time

Mabel will win Best Female Solo Artist

Mabel won Best Female Solo Artist

Oh yeah I forgot people actually make speeches

“There are so many amazing women in this category” Mabel Listens To FKA Twigs

Don’t thank your record label they are crooks

I forget that Mabel is Neneh Cherry’s daughter that’s wild. Neneh Cherry won a BRIT too, I think this same award. Cool. Neat.

Jack Whitehall’s sarcasm and dryer wit is not exactly the best fit for the BRITs. For once I miss Ant & Dec

Harry Styles Is Literally Wearing Pajamas

This is an ok song and with actually good vocal mixing it’s better but he does sound a bit off. He did get robbed before the awards happened though lol

I am sick of guys singing ballads with a e s t h e t i c backgrounds like can we get some volcano eruptions up in this

The Rising Star and British Producer Awards (new awards) were already given out I feel like cheating

Literally the only nomination for the British Producer of the Year was fred

He won

Another break bruh bruh bruh give me a break

Harry Styles’ Pajamas Are Wet Now He Was Standing In Water

Little simz is on an advert afterwards with an amazing song from her amazing album but she’s not nominated for any award

Im so tired like this shit is keeping me awake last year i fell asleep during a jess glynne performance

Liam payne performed a month before the ceremony and his album fell 31 places on the chart in response

Jack Whitehall called himself a lanky streak of piss this man might get an Ofcom Complaint

Lizzo’s really pushing that title track huh

Lizzo didn’t censor herself on the Grammys but her breathy ‘uh’s are making some lines unintelligible lol

This is a good song though

LOL SHE STOPPED FOR THE AUDIENCE TO CONTINUE HER SENTENCE BUT NOBODY SAID THE LINE YIKES

I guess she forgot Truth Hurts didn’t even peak in the top 20 here

Good as Hell is the one people here care about

She knows that they didn’t respond in Truth Hurts because she said ‘sing along if you know it’ lol

She kinda messed up but to be fair she is walking and singing with the audience

That White Guy With The Crap Hair Killed It

Drummer is going wild

I love the extra guitar flourishes in Juice this is pretty cool actually, her interpolating Cause I Love You at the same time is pretty epic this actually sounds pretty great I’d love for this whole medley to be on streaming

She yelled ‘biiitch’ but the mic did not catch that

Ronnie Wood Really Got The Positive Vibes

Lewis Capaldi will win Best Male Solo Artist

(Michael Kiwanuka got like no applause god damn at least give them pity applause)

ROIGHT and tha winna ***upside down*** is STRORMZY

Stormzy won Best Male Solo Artist

(Second time by the way)

Clean version of Vossi Bop kinda slap Ngl

Stormzy TOWERS over Ronnie Wood lol dude is tall

“Um.”

“Best Male is nothing without incredible females” Cool cool

Ronnie is about to tell Stormzy why he thinks he should go back to his own country and that He’s Not Actually Racist

(Those allegations are baseless. My lawyers advised me to say so.)

Jack Whitehall touched audience feet

We’re already nearly an hour in wow

WHY ARE THERE SO MANY ADVERT BREAKS

Yes Yes

Hell yeah dave is awesome, he got his Top Boy co-star to work as a hype man before him

I think this is Black? If so that’s amazing I love that song

It’s Black he has it written on his white piano

The only white piano is slowly turning more black

I like the headlines and all the imagery on the piano it’s really cool

Dave is a tad off beat but he’s also playing a double-sided piano so understandable

A white dude is playing the other side of the piano I’m sure that’s symbolic

He is aggressive in this delivery damn he’s killing it

Some of this imagery is beautiful – especially the BRIT Award being covered by black snakes and the Arabic writing transitioning into an Africa with colonial borders

This was an amazing performance, especially with the violins. Incredible.

OH THERE’S ANOTHER VERSE ABOUT BORIS JOHNSON

The least racist is still racist damn right

This works as an obituary as well damn.

I’d have to analyse this whole thing but this was an incredible performance oh my god

I want this on streaming

When did this man help a terrorist plot wh

Paloma Faith Sounds Like A Robot Who Is Vaguely Feminist

Burna Boy will win International Male Solo Artist

(I so want Tyler to go home with it though. Could go to Post as well)

It’s just whoever shows up gets it though so

WHOA

WHAT THE HELL

TYLER THE CREATOR WON HOW

TAHT IS AMSGWYUFE

THE RADIO HOST SAID IGOR WRONG BUT ITS OK TYLER WON

Tyler, The Creator won International Male Solo Artist

This gnarly dude just said ‘errr yeah errr’

“Shout out to all the British funk from the 80s I try to copy”

LOL THE THERESA MAY CALL OUT HAHAH

I FORGOT HE WASNT ALLOWED IN THE UK

Bts is not a british group, presenter

Coldplay will win Best British Group

Foals won Best British Group

I am actually so surprised lol at Tyler and Foals winning their first BRITs

More alternative dudes winning I guess. Neat. Means a lot

Stop thanking your corrupt labels

The name’s eyelash

I haven’t actually heard her Bond theme yet

Finneas do be lookin kinda handsome tho

I like it. The whispery tone of her voice, the eerie strings (cello?), and slick guitar really fit the Bond franchise. Thank you Billie Eilish, very cool!

No Don’t Talk To Lizzo Don’t Talk To Anyone Jack Whitehall

“There was so much energy they could have done the whole performance for me” well not exactly mrs. Lizzo

This is so awkward we can’t hear what Lizzo is laughing at Harry Styles looks pissed

‘floutists’ is the name for flute players huh

I’m so confused what is going on

Lizzo is threatening jack Whitehall with a flute and within the transition to the break i could hear a slight faint shout from jack in the background

Is everyone ok

More people that i wanted to win than who i expected to win are winning

Sam Fender is haha funnie but nobody in the audience thinks so lol

Celeste is performing she’s the new Rising Star award she has already had a bit of a crack but I’m pretty sure that’s part of the song

This song is ok

Bit boring tbh. Audience is getting tired too. This is lasting like 5 minutes and the song is pretty flavourless and repetitive. Yawn snore

We’re about half way through and I’ve kind of lost interest ngl

Honestly lewis capaldi did better than celeste on jah

Jack Whitehall is having a mental breakdown right now. Understandable

Billie Eilish will win International Female Solo Artist

Billie Eilish won International Female Solo Artist

Lizzo looks so disappointed for whatever reason lol like did we really think anyone else would get this award

Sporty Spice is in the background dancing to everything i wanted that is not a song you dance like that to it’s about suicide

This speech is going terribly

Why are so many of these gnarly dudes signed to polydor

Thank you Billie Eilish very cool

No Jack Whitehall Don’t Talk To Harry Styles

Harry Styles looks like he hates Jack Whitehall so much

The Lizzo-Harry-Jack Whitehall love triangle is Awkward And Awful

Lizzo is the only reason the brit awards are good

Ok the exchange about Harry Styles not being taken seriously was pretty funny

In fact this whole exchange was very funny And Partially About Incest

“Is one of these lucky ladies your date?” “That’s my sister”

Lizzo is chugging the tequila

Harry Styles Looks Like He Pissed Himself

The BRIT awards have suddenly become very confusing

Epic Stormzy Time

Genuinely have no idea what song he’ll perform. Probably Vossi Bop?

Stormzy Should Keep The Singing To His Backing Vocalist And Choir

Gospel beat sounds sweet

I think this is supposed to be Lessons but the studio version is so much duller than this version. This one is pretty cool. I think it’s the choir

I’d be surprised if he only does Lessons. Also the production value here was crazy. Full band, pyrotechnics and all.

Oh yeah it’s Vossi Bop time he’s got the red lighting

Nevermind it’s Wiley Flow lol but still

Reminds me of when Kanye did All Day (also the audio got muted for a long period of time just like when Kanye did that)

This one is more choreographed though lol

Why did he perform two of the least popular songs first though

Burna Boy is coming out for Own It alright, he sounds just as good as studio, probably because He’s Not Actually Singing

I don’t like this song but the choreography is great, stage presence is good and the visuals are incredible. Really shows that even with the worst material, you can make a song sound as lively as ever. The horns the live band added to Own It sound beautiful

Burna Boy’s little solo bit was great

He got away with saying “Sucking on their mums” nice

I hadn’t heard Rainfall before this I don’t think (it sounds familiar though), but the mashup with Praise You was great. I love the sight of Stormzy in front of family members, the young men in black outfits from Wiley Flow, the tropical clothes-bearing women from Own It, Burna Boy, the live band, and all. It’s really a nice diverse sight to see. Cool cool. This probably means absolutely nothing but I Am Knackered

Someone You Loved will win Song of the Year

I really hope it’s Ladbroke Grove though. It and Location feel very emblematic of 2019, in a way that I Don’t Care by Ed Sheeran and Justin Bieber DEFINITELY isn’t

Someone You Loved won Song of the Year

“Biggest winner of the night so far” there’s only one award left mate

Lewis Capaldi Is A Very Funny Man

“Thanks to my grandmother for dying”

Finneas do be lookin kinda handsome tho [2]

Heard a very british voice say “i luv yoo bilie” in the audience lmao

Lewis Capaldi will win Album of the Year

I’d prefer literally anyone else to win this award. Only one of these albums was a 7/10 or above but Lewis Capaldi’s album was unlistenable

OH HELL YEAH THE ONLY GOOD ONE WON

Dave won Album of the Year

Epic I love that album. It could very well have been Capaldi but since Dave won the Mercury Prize I guess he would have been a better prediction

People are screaming man’s lost for words

“Jesus Christ!” dude’s so astonished lol

I loved Dave’s speech actually very inspiring

“Jack, I’m gonna do this one for your mum, Hilary” bruh  rod stewart really saying ‘ur mom’ jokes out here

I love Rod Stewart’s raspy voice man. Orchestra’s great. This is beautiful lol

Gnarly dude got the guitar solo

Conclusion

I cannot be bothered to write some massive conclusion but most of the performances were great and emotionally powerful, especially Stormzy, Dave, Billie and Rod Stewart, and even those who were a bit crap performing were very funny on stage, like Lewis Capaldi. The on stage banter was really cringe-worthy but Jack Whitehall, Harry Styles and Lizzo had this really funny triangle going on. The outro with Ronnie Wood and the rest of Rod Stewart’s band was great, Stormzy’s extended performance was sweet. This was actually a pretty great BRITs, to be honest, and all of the winners, except a select few, deserved it, and if they didn’t, it was pretty expected. There could have been some more winners – off the top of my head, Slowthai and Little Simz weren’t even nominated, but hey, Tyler won. That’s great. The scorecard will be on Twitter. In the words of the BRIT Award winners in 2020, “errr yeah errr”, and thanks for reading!

REVIEWING THE CHARTS 2020

[maddistudies-blog]

welcome to the first post in my literature deconstructed series!! sorry for my crappy header. in this series ill be deconstructing some major points and themes in novels youll probably read in high school, or just generally good classics. i wont be going over plot too much - this is supposed to help with theme, characterization, symbols, etc. so with that, frankenstein is under the cut!

before we start i dont think i have to say this but just in case, frankenstein isn’t the monster k thx

mary shelley: 

fun fact #1: mary shelley is basically anyone’s dream child, and a BADASS. her father, william godwin, a philosopher and her mother, mary wallstonecraft, was an advocate for women’s rights. you combine the two, and you get an amazing teenage novelist who may have slipped some feminism in her first novel. she also married percy shelley, a super important romantic poet. basically the shelleys are the kardashians

the novel frankenstein, also known as the modern prometheus, was conjured from a wild ghost telling party with famous english novelists. like holy shit what a dream. and lemme tell you, mary’s story scared them alright. so, she decided to make it a novel! love you girl.

one more important note, is the time period. it was originally published in 1818, at the midpoint in the romantic era. the romantic era, held a certain emphasis on emotions. frankenstein is and isnt an emotional novel. (between victors wallowing and raising the dead and science, its a lot). but, many argue that the monster/creature in the novel is an advocate for the romantic novel. remember her husband was a romantic. its important to remember this time period when analyzing theme, and why mary shelley hates victor.

main players:

SO we got Victor Frankenstein. ah, victor. you angsty little shit. 

so victor had (emphasis on had) a pretty dang great family. he was raised from a young age with awesome parents, but ended up being an awful father to his creation, which ill talk more about later.

a big thing to remember with victor is that he cannot take blame. “woe is me” will be written on his gravestone i swear. really,, victor wants to play god but does not want the responsibility. 

and then theres walton. think of walton as the free trial version of victor. he wont be too bad, and you dont gotta pay for the full crazy experience. victor basically is a warning to walton to NOT PUSH HIS LIMITS, which walton, though he is very much like victor goes “YEET”

now for the star, the monster. ah, our precious little boy. he wasnt always a monster tho, and depending on your interpretation, he still isnt! before he was met with the cruelty of humanity, his intentions were actually pretty good? his innate humanity and empathy made him provide food to the delacey family, and he saw humans as superior beings. only after his abuse and neglect does he turn to murder, and many see this dude as a hero.

biblical allusions galore! (and other symbols/themes/ideas)

*cracks knuckles* boi the biblical allusions in this novel are crazy!!

so first we got this “spark” of creation. a literal spark, actually, aha. and from this creation, victor dreamed of being a GOD. he was so excited about having an entire species call him father, and boi it was weird. 

after this, the creature originally believed to be adam, after reading paradise lost. after all, that would make the most sense, right? but dont forget this novel is angsty. after his neglect and shunning from society, he felt more like lucifer. after all, wasnt lucifer god’s favorite angel, who betrayed him? a lot to unravel here. i wrote like a 6 page essay on this once, but thats the gist of the biblical allusions. its up to different interpretations: was shelley scorning it, scorning those who turn away angels and make them devils? up to you my dudes.

the duality of nature and man have a very important role as well. light, like from fire. fire at first intrigues the creature and delights him because of the warmth and light. (also see: the sun) but then it hurt to the touch. this duality of nature coincides with the duality of science, and how it can bring progress and devestation. 

in the pursuit of knowledge? 

in many ways, the novel is a cautionary tale, much like the inspiration, the rime of the ancient mariner. its like shelley is saying, “hey humanity, take it down a notch, could you? chill? Please???” the purpose of the ending is showing walton, who will probably drunkenly tell his friends about victor’s story of creation, and to put a halt on pushing the boundaries of science. are breaking ethics and common sanity worth it to create life? i dont think so. 

all in all victor is an angsty deadbeat dad, walton is victor but stronger, and the entire story is pretty depressing. also the creature deserved better.

[yespleasefandomtrash]

AlMei Week 2017 - Aroma/Teacher

This chapter was quite fun to write - but I can promise you it's probably not 100% scientifically accurate. Nonetheless, it should hold some decent entertainment value. I hope you enjoy Day 3: Aroma/Teacher. This chapter probably fits more along the lines of 'aroma.'

Read this chapter on fanfiction.net here.

Read Day 2 here.

Disclaimer: Fullmetal Alchemist is not mine. Yet.

xXxXxXx

Mei looked up from the autopsy reports laid out in front of her when she heard a knock at the door. Alphonse was standing outside of her office, manila folder in hand.

"I let myself in the building," he chuckled, answering the unasked question. "I heard another victim of the killer was found, so I figured you'd be pretty busy.

She sighed. "Unfortunately, you're right, though her body hadn't arrived here yet. Most people think the autopsy is the worst part, but I disagree – the paperwork is. Dead bodies are in and out, but everything else can take hours." She grabbed the pages in front of her and made a small stack. "But you're here now, so I'm not going to going to bother with these until later. I assume you have the photographs?"

Alphonse nodded, walking into her office and placing the folder on her now clear desk. "Are you by yourself today?"

Mei shook her head. "No. Winry's in her office. We're expecting the 'delivery' in an hour or so. That means you might have to stick around for an autopsy if we don't finish with the photos in time."

He laughed. "Fine by me. I'm sure you can teach me a few things, anyway."

The Xingese woman smiled. "If that occurs, I'll see what I can do." She paused, the corners of her lips turning into a frown. "Did you come by yourself?"

Alphonse's grin faltered. "Yeah. Is that okay?"

Mei's eyes widened. "Oh, yes!" she said hastily. "If I'm honest, I'm pretty happy Edward didn't tag along. You're the superior Elric by all means. Winry, however..." She sighed. "I don't know what she sees in your brother. He's as arrogant as they come, but to each their own, I suppose." She studied Alphonse from the corner of her eye, pleased by the blush dusted on his cheeks. "Me? I prefer someone more sensitive. Kinder. But still has a mind of their own."

The blonde raised a brow at her words. "Is that so? I'll give you a call if I find someone that fits that description."

She smirked. "How kind of you. But tell me – what do you look for in a girl, Alphonse?"

"Hmm... Well, she has to be intelligent. And not willing to back down even when she's under pressure. But also empathetic – someone who understands what others are going through and knows how to comfort them."

"Oh, geez. Would you two stop your flirting already? I'm going to get diabetes from how sugary sweet you're being."

Both jumped and turned to see Winry standing in the doorway, a hand resting on her hip and a smirk on her face.

"We were not flirting," Mei retorted, ignoring the blush she knew was painted on her cheeks. "It was just..." She faltered, looking for the right words. "Playful banter?"

Winry snorted. "Right. Anyways." She handed a folder to the Xingese woman. "I just finished putting this report in the computer. Anything else you need me to do before I get started on the next set?"

"Actually," Mei said, standing from her desk, "it'd be great if you could help Alphonse and I go over the photos of Hughes' crime scene we received from Fuery. Two sets of eyes is great, but three is even better."

Her assistant shrugged. "Sure. Should we go down into the morgue?"

"If that's the place we're least likely to be interrupted, I'm fine with it," Alphonse said.

Mei chuckled. "Don't worry. There shouldn't be any bodies on the table."

"Good to know."

The three went down the stairs and into the slightly colder air of the morgue, where they laid the photographs out on the autopsy table.

"These are more than likely going to be our most valuable pictures," Mei said, moving the images of the fingerprint away from the rest. "We need to scan these as soon as we can. I know right now a large selection of prints are being added to the system, so I want to wait until they've finished in order to have a better chance of getting results."

"I'm going to be completely honest with you guys," Winry said, studying the photo of Hughes inside the phone booth. "There's no way Hughes could be propped up inside there like that of his own accord. Someone had to position him. And I'd bet money it was the killer."

"I wonder if the FBI thought to check his body for latent prints," Mei mused. "Of course, if our suspicions are correct and his murder investigation was somehow managed by a corrupt individual, then I doubt it was." She was tempted to bring up the idea of exhuming Hughes body, but decided against it. It was a bit early for her to suggest something quite that drastic.

"I could have Ed check to see if they did, if you want," Alphonse said. "He's at the FBI today. Riza needed his help with something. I told him to keep an eye out for Luxure and Neid. He said he'd also talk to Havoc and see if Luxure does have an alibi for three nights ago."

"No, don't bother. I don't want him to seem suspicious and then somehow get thrown under the bus. It's bad enough that I've started getting death threats – we don't need him to receive any as well."

Alphonse froze. "You've started getting what?!"

Mei rolled her eyes. "They're nothing. Just letters telling me to back off the case – or else. Ooh. I'm so terrified, in case you couldn't tell."

The younger Elric pinched the bridge of his nose. "Mei, why didn't you say something?"

"For one, I always get letters like that. It comes with the job. And I've only received one relating to the Maes Hughes case. Maybe twenty minutes before you arrived." She reached into the pocket of her lab coat and pulled out a plastic bag with a crumpled envelope inside, smoothing it before she placed it on the table. "It basically says that if I keep working on the case, no good will come of it." Alphonse opened his mouth to speak, but she held her hand up to silence him. "This means we're closer to catching them than anyone else has gotten. They're paranoid."

"If you think Mei's going to give up then you're crazy, Al," Winry said, crossing her arms. "You thought I was stubborn? This girl's ten times worse."

Alphonse sighed. "Well, I was going to tell you to stop working on the case, but I guess that would be pretty pointless, huh?"

Mei smirked. "Yes. Yes it would." She glanced at the letter. "I'm tempted to burn it, but I want to check for prints. I've only handled it with gloves on in order to preserve them. If there are any, at least."

"I can dust it, if you want," Alphonse offered. "I brought a kit just in case."

"That'd be great!"

"Let me go get it from my car."

After he left, the two women returned their attention to the photographs in front of them.

"Alright," Mei said, tucking a strand of her dark hair behind her ear, "let's go over what we know so far. We've got a print that more than likely belongs to the killer."

"But what if it doesn't?" Winry suggested, playing the role of the devil's advocate – or perhaps a defense attorney. "What if it's from a careless officer at the scene?"

"It's true that we can't discount that possibility," Mei conceded, "but any decent officer would report his error and the photographs would likely either not have been taken at all or would not have been considered significant enough to have in detail or high quality." She studied a picture of Hughes' body. "It's also clear that it was more than likely the killer who propped his body up in such a way. FBI agents should know very well not to interfere with a crime scene."

Winry nodded. "Agreed." She picked up an image of a close up shot of Hughes' wounds. "He was stabbed six times, like all the other victims." She handed the photo to Mei, her brow furrowed in confusion. "Something about that seems off to me. Let's compare some different scenes. Give me a sec and I'll grab the files on all the other victims." She left the room, leaving Mei by herself.

The Xingese woman frowned as she examined the picture. Winry was right – something did seem off. But she couldn't place her finger on what.

Just then, Alphonse walked back into the room, cell phone to his ear. "Do you have any idea why they've started targeting him?" He paused, then rolled his eyes. "Alright, alright. I get it. Send me a text once you've got more information. Have you come across Havoc yet?" He sighed, and Mei bit back a laugh at the expression of exasperation painted on his face. "Fine, Ed. Anyways, I have to hang up now – do not screw yourself over. Bye." He tapped the phone before tucking it into his pocket. "Sorry about that – he's such a hassle."

"Did he figure something out?" Mei asked curiously.

"Not exactly. But apparently Yoki is now under suspicion of stealing the autopsy report and Hughes murder because his accusation of an FBI agent is 'absolutely outrageous.' At least, that's what Mustang told Ed. But I bet the fact that he's an ex-convict isn't helping his case."

Mei's jaw dropped. "Are you kidding me?!" She massaged her temples. "See, that's why I will never work for the government in such a direct manner. They can never fathom the idea that there's a traitor in their ranks. They'll pin the crime on the first person they can."

"That's why Ed quit. He was sick of their games."

She sighed. "I get the feeling that things have been corrupt within the FBI for more years than we can count."

"Agreed."

"Anyways." She handed him the bag with the envelope in it. "You can dust this for prints now. Just be careful not to get it on anything else. It can be a pain to remove."

He nodded. "Roger that." He took the bag and moved to the side of the room just as Winry returned.

"Alright," she said, plunking the folders onto the table. "I'll read these aloud one at a time while you tell me if there are any strange inconsistencies with Hughes' case. Okay?"

"Got it," Mei said.

"First victim was a woman. Hazel Jones. 23 years old. Worked in a retail store. No criminal background. Both parents living. No significant other. No children."

And so they went on, with Winry going through each file as Mei mentally compared their cases to Hughes'. After a good forty five minutes or so, they got to the final folder.

"Most recent victim before Hughes was a male. Alex Jackson. 18 years old. Worked in a fast food restaurant. Fined for shoplifting at the age of 15. Parents divorced. No significant other. No children." Winry stopped. "Did anything seem off to you?"

"Quite a few things, actually," Mei said, crossing her arms over her chest. "For one, Hughes was easily the oldest victim we've had so far. A seven year age difference. He was also the only victim employed with the military – the rest all worked for minor establishments or didn't have a job at all."

"Easier prey, in other words," Winry noted.

"Exactly. Hughes was also the only one to die from a gunshot wound to the chest and not the head. Only one other victim was married with children like he was." Mei stared at her assistant, eyes heavy. "I'm getting the feeling that Hughes was the main target, Winry. I think the other victims were a sort of 'cover-up.'"

The blonde woman cursed under her breath. "I can't believe it. Who would kill dozens of people just to make it seem like the death of one person was a coincidence?"

"More than you'd think," Alphonse said from the side of the room. "And I hate to interrupt your discussion, but I managed to salvage a partial print from this envelope. I want to compare it to the print from the crime scene. Do you have –"

"Right over there," Winry interrupted, gesturing the computer behind her. "Use that."

He nodded. "Thanks."

Mei handed him one of the crisper photos of the fingerprint. "Have fun with that. I hate matching up prints. Too time-consuming."

He chuckled at the expression of disgust on her face. "Then you're lucky I'm here."

Winry and Mei returned their attention to the photographs laid out on the table.

"There really is something off about this photo," the Xingese doctor muttered, placing her finger on the close up of Hughes' stab wounds. "But like you said – I can't put my finger on what."

"I know what you need," Winry chuckled. "A nice cold bottle of water. It'll clear your mind. I'll go get them."

"Thanks, Winry."

"Just doing my job. Al? You want one, too?"

"Yes, thank you."

At that, the blonde left the room.

The air grew silent as Alphonse continued to compare the prints while Mei racked her brain to figure out what was so wrong with the photo of Hughes' stab wounds. Like the other victims, there were six. That wasn't unusual. They were all within a few inches of each other, which was a bit odd, but not completely unheard of. The blood was partially clotted around some and oozing around others.

Her eyes widened. The blood. The blood should not have been clotting if all the wounds were postmortem!

Mei picked the photo up and looked as carefully as she could. "I can't believe it..." Three of the six wounds had blood clotting on the edges. That meant they were premortem. And based on how much blood was clotted, she'd approximate that they had been caused about thirty or so minutes before his death, though she couldn't say for certain without the body.

And now that she was looking for it, those three wounds also had a slightly different shape than the others. That implied that they were caused by a different weapon. Albeit a similar one to whatever stabbed him the final three times.

"Alphonse," she said slowly, placing down the photograph, "do you think we can get a court order to exhume Hughes' body?"

Alphonse turned around, eyebrow raised. "You want to exhume his body? Why?"

"I have reason to believe that three of Hughes' wounds were premortem instead of postmortem, despite what we were told," Mei explained. "I don't think Riza was lying to us when she said all six wounds were made after his death – I think she was purposely misinformed by someone above. The only problem is that I can't confirm this unless I have his body. I hate to phrase it like this, but he's only been in the ground a few days – he should still be in decent condition."

"Well, we can definitely try," he said. "I can call Ed and tell him to get one for the sake of convenience."

"That would be much appreciated. Thank you."

"No problem." Alphonse took his phone out of his pocket and dialed a number. "Ed?" He blinked in surprise. "Yeah, sure. One sec." He moved the phone from his ear and held it out to Mei. "Ed has Havoc on the line for you. He was just about to call."

Mei hesitated but accepted the phone. "Hello?"

"Doctor Chang. How've you been? It's not like we saw each other yesterday or anything."

She rolled her eyes, recognizing the voice of Jean Havoc. "I'm fine. And yourself?"

"I'm great. Tell me, Doctor – have you gotten with Alphonse yet?"

She turned bright red at his words. "I fail to see how that is relevant, sir. Why did you need to speak to me?"

"Edward said that you had some questions for me. I'm on break right now, so I figured I'd give you a call."

She opened her mouth before snapping it shut. "Right. I'd almost forgotten. You said you were with your girlfriend Luxure three nights ago for the entire time, correct?"

"Uh... Yeah, I guess so."

"Are you completely sure? Would you be able to confirm this in court?"

"Why do you need to know? Has she done something wrong?"

Mei hesitated. No, the woman hadn't done anything wrong – and that was the problem. She had no proof whatsoever that Luxure had been involved with stealing her autopsy report, much less Hughes' death. "Not that we're aware of. But she considered a suspect in a current investigation."

"What investigation? Are you conducting it yourself?"

"At the moment I am not at liberty to disclose that information."

"I'm going to be honest with you, Doctor – I don't like being kept out of the know."

Mei winced. "I understand, sir. But surely you realize why you must be."

On the other end of the line Havoc sighed. "Luxure and I were together the entire time three nights ago, okay? So she's got an alibi – which I assume is what you were checking for."

Mei's heart sank at those words. "I see. Thank you. That was all I needed to know."

"Glad I was able to help."

She slowly handed the phone back to Alphonse, who noticed the distraught look on her face. He said a few words of his own to Havoc and Edward – including asking him to obtain a court order – before hanging up.

"Mei?" he asked, golden eyes filled with worry. "Are you okay?"

She sighed. "I don't understand. How can she have an alibi?!"

"Keep in mind that you never had solid reason to suspect her," Alphonse said. "I hate to be that person, but a gut feeling is useless in court."

"I know," she muttered. "But I was so sure! I thought –"

She was interrupted by Winry's return. "Sorry it took me so long," the blonde apologized. "Someone called your office, Mei. Apparently the body we're expecting has been delayed. It won't come until tomorrow or the day after. Which is a pain – I hope they preserve it properly." She put two water bottles down and kept one for herself. "Here you go."

Alphonse accepted the bottle while Mei picked hers up rather distractedly, her mind still trying to wrap itself around the fact that her instinct had been wrong. There was just nothing she could do. She seriously doubted Havoc had lied to her, which meant someone else must have been driving the getaway van.

But who?

The Xingese woman was brought out of her thoughts when the bitter smell of almonds hit her nose. "What the?!" she muttered, eyes wide. Surely that wasn't what she thought it was. She looked around, trying to determine where the smell was coming from.

Out of the corner of her eye she noticed that Alphonse had opened his water bottle. She and Winry had not.

"Wait!" she shouted, stepping towards him in an attempt to grab the bottle before he could put it to his lips. "Don't drink that!"

Alphonse froze, the water halfway to his mouth. "Why? What's wrong with it?"

"Trust me," was her response. "You don't want that in your system. Give me the bottle."

He hesitated for only a moment before handing it over to her.

As carefully as she could, Mei wafted the scent from the bottle and smelled it. "I knew it," she muttered, glaring at the water as if it had insulted her.

"Knew what?" Winry asked, brow furrowed in confusion. "Mei, what are you going on about?"

"This is not water," Mei said, holding up Alphonse's bottle. "Or at least not entirely. It's contaminated with cyanide. I can smell it."

"Really?" Alphonse said, brow raised. "What does it smell like to you? Because I can't smell anything."

"Almonds," she replied grimly. "And the ability to smell cyanide is a sex-linked recessive trait contained in only thirty to forty percent of the population. So I can't say I'm surprised you can't detect the scent. I'm unfortunately in the percentage that can. But it comes in handy in certain situations – such as this one. If you had ingested this water, Alphonse, you would be dead or dying right now."

His face grew pale. "Lovely."

"Thanks for that image, Mei," Winry grumbled. "I don't think I'll ever be able to drink water again."

"I'd certainly advise not to drink from the bottle you're holding," Mei instructed. "In fact, I'd like to dispose of all the water bottles in the building. Do you know who might have brought them?"

Winry shrugged. "Nope. People bring in drinks all the time."

"That means they could have been planted," Alphonse added. "You should take those threats you're getting seriously, Mei. I'm willing to bet this was an attempt on your life."

Mei frowned. "Perhaps. But it was one bound to fail. Whoever did this clearly wasn't aware I can smell cyanide."

Winry snorted. "Mei, I wasn't even aware you could do that."

"Well, I never saw the need to bring it up."

"You're missing the point, Mei." Alphonse ran a hand through his golden hair. "Someone tried to kill you. And you're dismissing it like it's nothing!"

"Because it is nothing!" Mei protested. "Cyanide is a cowardly attempt at trying to kill someone. I'll start to worry when there's a gun pointed at my head, okay?" She didn't want to keep this argument up. "Anyways – was the print on the envelope a match of the one at the crime scene?"

Alphonse looked as if he wasn't done insisting she was in danger, but chose to relent with a sigh. "Yes. It was."

Mei grinned. "Really? Yes! Now all we need is a court order to exhume Hughes' body. I know we can catch the killer. I just know it." She paused, a frown falling on her lips. "Wait. I want to talk to Hughes' wife. Gracia. I want to ask her permission."

"Are you sure that's a good idea?" Winry asked. "A court order's all you need."

"By law, maybe," Mei said, "but it wouldn't feel right to me not getting her permission."

"I have to agree with you there," Alphonse mused. "Getting her permission is the right thing to do."

"I'll go tomorrow," Mei decided. "I'll take an early train so I miss as little work as possible." She chuckled. "I don't want to leave everything to you again, Winry."

"I'll come, too," the younger Elric added. "You're going to want an officer with you."

"I think you just want to hang out with her, don't you, Al?" Winry smirked.

"I'd hope he does," Mei said honestly. "I've grown rather fond of his company."

"Great," Winry said, ignoring Alphonse's sputtered protests. "I hereby assign Al to be your bodyguard, Mei. I'd be beyond enraged if you died and left me to take over your position. Understand?"

Mei laughed. "Of course." She winked at Alphonse. "Meet you at the station for five, alright?"

Alphonse simply sighed, wondering what on Earth he was getting himself into.

xXxXxXx

I didn't really address the prompt until near the end. Whoops. Even so, I'm mostly satisfied. I hope you return tomorrow for Day 4: Hair/Travel!

Read Day 4 here.

[lopezdorothy70-blog]

Watch: 9/11 Survivors & Firefighters Explain How Bombs Were Going Off In The Buildings

We recently published an article about the fact that a Federal Grand Jury will be tasked to listen to and deliberate on evidence of a controlled demolition of all three towers on September 11th, 2001. This is exciting news, and it's one of multiple examples that illustrate how America is far from being a democracy. Millions of Americans (well over 50 percent) have expressed their concerns over what really happened that day, and have been demanding an investigation into the events for nearly 20 years. If Americans lived in a real democracy, the voice of the people would have been heard already and an investigation would be taking place. But there have been no further investigations, and our cries continue to be ignored, which is why it's great to see citizens standing up and taking action for themselves instead of relying solely on the government.

There is more than enough evidence to prove that foul play occurred on 9/11, and much of it comes from US intelligence agencies. For example, General Albert Stubblebine, who is credited with redesigning the U.S. Army intelligence architecture during his time as commanding general of the U.S. Army Intelligence & Security Command, has been very outspoken about 9/11, claiming that a plane did not actually hit the Pentagon. We also have peer-reviewed studies published in physics and engineering journals concluding that all three towers were brought down by a controlled demolition, a president of the United States (Donald Trump) stating that there is no way planes brought down the towers, and thousands upon thousands of architects and engineers alluding to the same thing.

You can see these articles and access those studies further down within this article, as they're linked below the video.

And how about the fact that George H. W. Bush met with the Bin Laden family the morning of 9/11?

Regardless of what you believe, all of this information warrants an investigation, and the fact that this hasn't been done yet simply isn't right. Why has the US government refused to publicly investigate 9/11 for this long?

Perhaps some of the most shocking revelations regarding 9/11 come from the people who were actually there. Unfortunately, many of the people passed away during the event,  but some managed to escape the building and many firefighters on site survived as well. (See video below).

Below is a picture taken in 1997 of Robert McIlvaine (far left) and his family, including his son Bobby (far right) who died in the north tower of the World Trade Center on September 11, 2001. McIlvaine has become a vocal 9/11 truth activist, along with countless other family members of the victims of 9/11.

Bobby McIlvaine was the inspiration behind The Bobby McIlvaine World Trade Center Investigation Act, which is a draft legislation aimed at investigating the destruction of all three WTC towers. Bobby lost his life at the age of 26 when he entered the north tower, and his father has been a leading advocate for a new investigation.  You can contact your members of Congress through their website at http://AE911Truth.org/Justice or directly on your own to help with this cause.

Below is a video of Bobby's father and a compilation of multiple clips of survivors and firefighters who were actually in the building that day. It's really something else to watch a video of people who actually experienced this event and heard the explosions go off inside.

Related CE Articles on 9/11

Donald Trump Implies That 9/11 Was A Controlled Demolition

'9/11 Unmasked': The Ultimate Evidence-Based Challenge To The Official Narrative

Studies Show WTC Building 1,2 & 7 Could Not Have Fallen  – Why Does The The US Still Lie About 9/11? 

2 Year Study Supports World Trade Centre 7 Brought Down Via Controlled Demolition

15 Disturbing Facts About 9/11 You'll Wish Weren't True

Physicists & Engineers Publish Another 9/11 Study: All Three Buildings Were “Destroyed By Controlled Demolition”

George H.W. Bush Met With The Bin Laden Family on the Morning of 9/11

Listen: 9/11 Firefighters Tell How Explosions Were Going off In The Lobby of WTC1 

The Takeaway

Despite how tragic 9/11 was, it ultimately served a purpose. It 'woke up' millions of people to the fact that “the war on terror” is a complete sham, and that events like 9/11 are often used as justification for the infiltration of other countries to serve ulterior motives. However, 9/11 is not the only example of this. For example, the chemical gas attacks in Syria were another false-flag terrorist attack, and for the first time in history, multiple politicians actually used the term “false flag.”

But again, it's a narrative that's been emphasized forever. “The truth is, there is no Islamic army or terrorist group called Al Qaeda. And any informed intelligence officer knows this. But there is a propaganda campaign to make the public believe in the presence of an identified entity representing the 'devil' only in order to drive the 'TV watcher' to accept a unified international leadership for a war against terrorism. The country behind this propaganda is the US and the lobbyists for the US war on terrorism are only interested in making money.” – former British Foreign Secretary Robin Cook (This quote was given at the House of Commons, I retrieved it from Pierre-Henri Bunel)

9/11 and other events that followed have created a massive shift in consciousness, and this change in perception is still gaining momentum.

Tragedies like 9/11 serve as a reminder that we must strive not to repeat history. We need to question the truth of these events and conduct our own research in order to prevent further corruption from occurring. These events provide us with the opportunity to see through the veils that have been blinding the masses for decades.

Take a moment to compare the narrative we were told on that day to the research we've uncovered nearly 20 years later. We've gone from thinking it's a terrorist attack to amassing tons of studies, research, and witness testimonies in support of 9/11 being an inside job.

More and more people are waking up to the reality of what happened on 9/11, and the Fawcett will not stop dripping.

[chaos-weekly]

one rotten apple or an ever changing path

Nollie was pretty sure getting your first tattoo was supposed to be fun. She was also sure that introducing your brother to your boyfriend was supposed to be at least bearable. And both of those things were; it was just the aftermath that was unbearable. 

Parker had liked London much more than she had thought he would. He was the more judgemental of her brothers, especially when it came to boys she dated, but he had hit it off with her boyfriend immediately, so much so that Nollie had stayed almost silent while London tattooed the tiny “F” on her hip, right where it could be covered by even her tiniest underwear or swimsuits. Normally Parker would have been a little uncomfortable by his sister’s more exposed lower body, but his conversation with London seemed to distract him. It was perfect: the tattoo, the experience, her brother with London. 

Nollie should have known it was too good to be true.

London had dragged Parker into his office to show him his portfolio (Parker had quite a few tattoos himself as wanted to see London’s work. His previous artist had moved from Wall Street where Parker worked off to Middle of Nowhere, Georgia. He was considering getting another while he was in town), so Nollie had occupied herself by talking to Winter up front. She’d grown fond of the girl in her frequent visits, and with her practically being London’s sister, Nollie had really valued their positive relationship.

“You know, I’m really glad this worked out,” Winter was saying. The two had been laughing at the blossoming bromance in the backroom. “I liked you from the start, I was just nervous London would rush things.”

Nollie raised an eyebrow, intrigued.

“Do tell,” she said, leaning on the counter Winter was behind. The other girl shrugged.

“I was nervous that he was going to force you into having sex. He talked a couple times about how he’d heard Ainsley saying that it was a while since you’d had sex, and that someone as hot as you probably had pent up horniness that was going to result in months of good sex. And I told him not to force you to do anything you didn’t want to or weren’t ready for, but he said not to worry-- he was just going to do everything he could to convince you that he could end your hibernation with him as soon as possible.”

Nollie’s mind was reeling. London had started hanging out with her because he wanted to have sex with her? Half of her said it was ridiculous, that he genuinely cared about her and wouldn’t do anything to hurt her. But the other half reminded her of Kendall. That was years of time together when he stayed with her for sex and publicity. It didn’t seem too far in left field for him to do it again.

“That’s kind of f-ked up, isn’t it,” Winter whispered, probably just now realizing it herself. Nollie swallowed, her eyes meeting Winter’s. 

But she snapped out of it as soon as she heard two familiar laughs rejoining them. She put on a fake smile, dodged London’s kiss to her lips and directed him to her cheek, and she and Parker slipped out without her having to say too much besides a: “I’ll see you Wednesday night.”

///

Nollie went to London’s the next morning to return the portfolio he’d let Parker borrow. Her brother had flown back to New York City that evening and couldn’t return it himself, so she’d gone at a strategic time when she was sure her boyfriend would be at work and before she saw Bishop that afternoon for a shoot in one of the houses Langston had recently completed. This would hopefully give her enough time to process and pull her things from his drawer, just in case. She also hadn’t really been replying to his texts. She was nothing if not emotionally bubble wrapped.

Nollie unlocked London’s apartment and almost turned around and left when she saw a man sitting on the couch with his back to her. Who was that? But when the man turned around, neon green beanie and all, her mouth formed a little “o.”

“Paris?” she guessed, stepping further into the apartment and letting the door close behind her. The man’s face lit up, and he sprung out of his chair to wrap Nollie in the biggest bear hug she’d ever received. 

“Finally!” he exclaimed, pulling away to look her over. “My brother keeps talking about you, and you sure live up to the da-n hype.” He winked, and she couldn’t help but laugh. Paris was identical to London, but shorter (just a few inches taller than the already tall Nollie) and much skinnier. His arms were just as heavily tattooed, had the style of a neon grunge band from the 90s, and reeked of spray paint and weed. He reminded her of the class clown in a coming of age movie, and Nollie had a feeling she wasn’t too far off with that assumption. 

“I’m glad to hear it,” she said, grinning. “It’s nice to meet you. London’s said so much about you.”

“Good things?” Paris asked, not hopeful at all and sighing at Nollie’s lack of response. “God, I know I’m a royal f-ck up and he’s not proud of me, but he really doesn’t have to tell everyone. Especially not beautiful women.” He collapsed back into the chair he’d been in before.

“I’m pretty sure London’s proud of you, Paris,” Nollie said, moving towards London’s room. “He talks about your art and growing up with you and how close you two are now.”

“A lot?” Paris asked. Nollie shook her head.

“But that doesn’t mean he’s not.”

“London’s kinda the bragging type, Nollie. I know you’ve noticed.” She grimaced. Yeah, PDA was London’s strong suit. It made her stomach churn. He was using her.

“I’ll let you do what you came here for,” he said, waving her off and pulling out his phone. So she did. Nollie slipped into London’s room, dropped his portfolio on his bed, and cleaned every remnant of herself out of his room. When she came out, Paris had switched to an iPad and was sketching out what Nollie could only guess was a commission for someone. He saw her and patted the arm of the chair. And Nollie sat down. Just because things were weird with London didn’t mean they had to be with his brother. Without her asking, he explained what he had been commissioned to do and showed her all of the sketches and inspiration pictures of color palettes and the list of supplies he was making. Paris was what he called a reformed street artist. Now he mostly only spray painted what he was paid to. But Nollie was able to maintain a conversation by using art terms and the little knowledge she’d picked up from London, Langston, Ainsley, and Bishop-- each artists in their own way. He was impressed. He let Nollie watch as he continued to work, something he said he let very few people do, and let her draw a little something that he said was so unlike anything he’d do or come up with that he had to leave it in the final piece.

“You know, you’re just as cool as London said you were,” Paris said, grinning up at her. 

“And you’re way cooler than he said you were,” Nollie replied. 

“When he called me and said you two had finally hooked up, I was so relieved. Sure, he talked a lot about how much he liked you, but I remember first messaging him about how he wanted to f-k you from the minute he saw you and was one hundred percent going to make it happen.”

Nollie swallowed, the air suddenly becoming more serious. She looked away from a now frowning Paris.

“Hey, you know he wasn’t using you, right? You’re not Kendall. He really likes you,” he said, clearly trying to put a bandage on a broken bone.

“I know,” Nollie said, standing up. “I really do, Paris. It’s just not as easy for me to think about sex and relationships as it seems to be for everyone else.”

Paris seemed to buy that.

“I get it. I’m kind of the same way. But hey, I’m glad you feel comfortable around London.”

“Thanks, Paris.” She smiled weakly. “I’ve got to run to a shoot, but it was nice to meet you.”

“You’re like the big sister I wish I had growing up,” Paris admitted shyly. And her smile turned real.

He was like the little brother she’d lost. Unfortunately, she might lose Paris soon, too.

///

She wasn’t focusing on the shoot with Bishop, so much so that he’d called for a timeout in the most frustrated voice she’d ever heard him use.

“What’s up with you today, Nollie?” he asked, pulling her aside. He was annoyed, and now he had her eyes watering. “Oh gosh, Nollie, what’s wrong?” Bishop wrapped an arm around her shoulder, but Nollie pushed it off, dabbing her eyes before she could ruin her makeup.

“Did you know?” 

“Did I know what?”

And Nollie told him everything, sparring him no detail. Her conversation with Winter, her meeting Paris. She shared her feelings, but Bishop knew about the whole Kendall situation, so she didn’t have to go too in depth.

“It’s like he doesn’t value my feelings about sex at all, Bish,” Nollie finished. “Why the h-ll would you start a relationship with someone just to f-k them?”

“To play Devil’s advocate,” Bishop said, pausing to allow Nollie to give him the go-ahead. She nodded.

“To play Devil’s advocate, he clearly really likes you now. I’d say he’s falling in love with you. And when we talked before and I said that he was falling in love with you, I meant it. Sure, London’s got a good poker face, but those were real feelings. It’s hard to make those up.”

“That’s what makes this hard.” Nollie groaned, leaning against the wall. “I’m falling in love with him, too. And I know that if he tells me he loves me, I’m going to get all mushy. So I need to go in with a decision already made.”

Bishop nodded, agreeing. This was really like when she’d asked him to help her break up with Langston all over again.

“So, what are your options?”

“Stay with him and stand on the fact that the path people are on can change halfway through.”

“And?”

“Break up with him and stand on the fact that one rotten apple spoils the whole barrel.”

“Both of those are true, Nollie.”

“I know.”

“So how are you going to decide?”

“I guess I’m just going to have to figure out what I feel. Maybe it’s time to go back to journaling.”

“Maybe,” Bishop said, giving her a hug. “Well, just let me know what you decide. I’m here for you, Nols.”

“Thanks, Bishop,” Nollie said, smiling weakly. “Let’s get back to the shoot so I can get home.”

She was going to see London in a few short days, and she needed to have her decision ready.