#but also fears fandom because i know how fandom spaces are and i hate them

[cosmicredcadet]

If anyone erased my OCs aro and ace identities I think I would become evil and commit heinous crimes actually.

[potions-of-dark-devotion]

Gotta Get This off my Chest

Severus Snape & HBO Series

Alright first off, I know you are generally expecting well thought out essays from me but here I’m going to Ramble Freeform. You’ve been warned.

I don’t know how I feel at all about another actor attempting to play Severus Snape. JK Rowling is the main producer and honestly this worries me a lot considering the amount of hatred she has for LGBTQ people and the amount of hatred Severus has gotten in the last years. This space is bad sometimes but generally we have a fantastic community of people in this snapedom who love the character as he is written positives and negatives. I for one liked Snape from the first book I read and the first movie I watched.

I’ll be the first to admit that my image of him is very much wrapped up in Alan Rickman, and tho I greatly respect other peoples images of snape and I love the fan art they make, the thing that made Alan such an amazing character actor for the part was the unabashed love he had for the character. Look at any interview of him about Severus and you will see that he went to bat for him at every turn. What if we we are given someone who sees Snape through the eyes of the marauders fandom? What if they erase all of Snapes goodness or heaven forbid write extra scenes of cruelty to Lily that didn’t exist, or have him creep over her, or physically attack her, or characterize him as the aggressor with James when we all know it was the other way around? These kinds of fears keep me from being excited about the new series and instead leave me anxious.

For one thing, I wish they had focused more on a different period of wizard history, or a different part of the 1st wizarding war or even marauders/young Severus era, because there is so much to explore. I would have liked to explore story lines that really could use more fleshing out, and if JK Rowling is going to be a part of this she could have easily written new passages or short stories to suit this new narrative. I also worry about the fact that yet again because she is a producer there will certainly be no LGBTQ characters in the narrative and that’s a waste to me. We already have a fantastic interpretation of the books, and if they are doing a redo why not cast people of color or trans or any LGBT characters in the mix? It will be the same story just perhaps fleshed out more? I’m not sure what this series will bring to the table that the movies did not unless they radically change some things.

Yet, with this interpretation we may see many thing in the series that we don’t see in the books. Severus has two big scenes at the end of POA and GOF that were totally left out of the movies, and if this was left in and the “prank” was explored more in depth we could get to see an even more complex narrative than Alan was allowed to portray in the movies (largely due to directorial choices).

Severus as we all know is a complex character that can be different or difficult to understand without a trauma informed lense and the last thing I want is for them to shove him into a gross stereotype, or give him attributes that don’t exist in the books in order to cater to certain fandoms. I’m genuinely worried about the prospect of this. I also don’t want our fandom safe spaces that we’ve spent years curating to be over run with Snape hate again just because of the series. I could be being pessimistic. It’s just been on my mind lately.

No hard feelings it’s just…Severus Snape is my comfort character and I don’t want the idea of it ruined by people who don’t really understand him or who wouldn’t bat for him the way Alan did. Please understand me. Does anyone else have mixed feelings this way?

[mintaikk]

Moments I think Blitzø realized his feelings for Stolas

I really don't think that Blitzø had an "Oh" moment. I think it was over a period of time, where he slowly realizes it, and then it comes unleashing out in either The Full Moon or Apology Tour.

Anyways, here

Seeing Stars (S2, ep2)

This was Blitzø's reaction when he saw Stolas's human form for the first time. God, I love his subtle expressions here sm. Read this post, they explain it well, and it's also the post that made me want to make this post.

In the first pic, Blitzø looks surprised and confused, probably from the shock of seeing Stolas's human form for the first time. Probably didn't even consider he ever had one, lol

The second image, we see a small blush appear, and as @ifwebefriends said, it's the "I'm fucked" face, as he is filled with complicated emotions as he realizes he likes Stolas in every form. He looks really worried by this.

The third image, hid pupils are fully dilated. Instead of confused, he looks genuinely worried and vulnerable. His expression doesn't show lust, but more like a mix of someone who is nervous to be around someone they like and genuine fear. He is realizing that it isn't just lust, but that he genuinely likes Stolas, and that's scary to him.

In the fourth image, he quickly turns around, slightly hunched over and rubbing his hands together; both behaviors indicating nervousness, probably at his own emotions. He also asks Stolas if he can somehow give them human disguises, which yes, is relevant to what's going on, but it can also be him being like, "maybe I'm just interested in the human disguise," so he can believe that instead of dealing with his own emotions.

(Also, have this gif of Blitzø checking Stolas out in his human disguise)

Then that scene in Seeing Stars that, when I joined the fandom, was the first thing I saw fans losing their shit over

Nothing much to comment on here. He's actually smiling at Stolas's advances. The other times Stolas flirted with him, it's always been overly aggressive ("jelly sandwiches all night~"), and this time, it's more subtle and intimate, which clearly worked for Blitzø.

Oops (S2, ep6)

In this moment, Fizz hit Blitzø with the allegations, and this was Blitzø's reaction to it. Look at his expressions! The first image looks confused and scared and heart broken, like he knew he fell, but he's either in denial, ignoring it, or doesn't think it's reciprocated; perhaps even all 3.

The second image, he looks sad, angry, and confused, like he doesn't know his emotions and can't name them, but he's hurt. He's frustrated at how complicated things are, and he hates it.

The 3rd image is now just full denial. When lying, people often look to the side or avoid eye contact, which is exactly Blitzø is doing right here. He knows that its more than sex every month, but he's lying to himself, because he can't get hurt if it is just casual.

Alright, imma have to do a part 2 to this cuz I ran out of space. I'll try to go in episode order next time lol, I just go excited with these 2 lol

Part 2

[olderthannetfic]

I'm feeling weird about an interaction I had the other day, and I'm wondering if I could get... I dunno, advice, I guess? From the usual commenters here.

So, context is that three-ish years ago, I got hate-brigaded in the fandom where I did most of my writing, in a way that came out of nowhere, and also in such a way that I felt like I deserved it. I ended up deleting everything I'd made for that fandom off the internet just to make it stop, including nearly six years of an art blog. I got a reality check later from friends whose credibility I trusted a lot more than random strangers on the internet, and eventually reposted most of the fic (backdated to the original dates of posting), and do actually still post fic in that fandom (also backdated to avoid notice). I also post a couple of fics on that account that are not backdated where I write with OCs from the original fandom fic in other fandoms.

The other day, someone who had been working their way through kudosing my stuff in the old fandom posted a complementary comment about it on the most recently updated of the two fanfics that isn't in that fandom, said they liked my OCs in the original fandom fic, and asked if I'd ever be interested in writing about that original fandom again. I explained that I was still writing fic in that fandom, it was just all backdated because most people really did not seem to like what I was writing.

And they responded saying that was too bad, and asking my opinion about a character they love, noting that it's pretty obvious from my fic that I don't like them and wondering why. And, like, this was probably just someone who was looking for fandom connection... but the character they were asking about is one of the most popular characters in the entire fandom. Most of the people still actively writing fic in this fandom are writing about this character, so if they wanted people to engage with about this character, they had basically everyone but me to engage with. And the person who set off the initial hate brigade against me that lead to me deleting basically my entire internet presence for months had this character as their URL.

So in my brain, I immediately go, "bait, this is bait," and delete this person's comments, delete my one response to them, and lock down comments on all the works on that account. And I know, I know that's paranoid overreaction. Based on their kudos pattern, this person was clearly working their way slowly through all the things on that account, which is not something someone who was only there to bait me would do. The only slightly off thing they did was comment on an unrelated most-recently-updated work instead of one of the works for the actual fandom. Probably they didn't realize that most people have comment emails turned on and didn't know I'd see a comment if they posted it on one of the older works, and they definitely didn't know what asking that particular question would do to me.

But I just... don't know how to exist in a fandom space any more without intense paranoia. I want to keep writing these things that bring me joy, and I do, but I miss being able to have my comments open without fear. I miss being able to post to a blog that wasn't locked down from Tumblr search. I wish I could interact with ANY fandom these days—not just that original one, but any fandom at all—and not feel like someone is going to turn on me out of nowhere. I can't overstate how out-of-nowhere that hate brigade was: my average fic got maybe 2 kudos. My art blog had fewer than 100 followers, and on average I got like 5 notes. I still to this day don't know why the person who set it off had such a hate-on for me, because it was clear from some of the anons I was getting that they'd built up a hell of a litany of ills to pile on my head, while all being vague enough that I never quite got a clear picture of what they were accusing me of.

I know part of the solution is to grow a thicker skin, and to block frequently. And I've been working on that, I guess I just... thought I was doing a bit better at growing a thicker skin and not being reactionary and the other day's incident made it really, really apparent I'm not, and I don't know what to do about it, because apparently the therapy is not doing enough! (Not that my therapist understands fandom...)

Any advice?

--

I mean... it's PTSD or something of the sort. Treat it as such.

[tossawary]

Thinking about how hard the "Star Wars" prequel films dropped the ball in terms of female representation. Like, looking back on the original trilogy, it kind of sucks that the only main female character is Leia, and while Leia does kick ass and I love her, it also sucks that the last film 1) put her in that bikini and 2) abruptly made her Luke's twin but didn't let her have a lightsaber or use a lot of the cool space magic powers.

When you only have one female character, she often ends up bearing the unintended burden of a lot of hopes and expectations of fans. She's just one person. She's never going to be compelling to everyone.

And then you have the prequels and you'd hope that they'd do a little better with male-female ratios this time? With experience? But the only main female character is Padmé, who's pretty fun, but also ends up 1) desperately in love with a murderer, 2) spending most of the last movie barefoot and pregnant, staring out a window, because they cut the "founding of the Rebellion" plotline, and 3) dying not because she was Force-choked but because she has "lost the will to live" because "fuck them kids", I guess.

(I know there's theories about Sidious siphoning her life force or what the fuck ever, but I don't caaaaare, because I hate the idea that Sidious has that kind of reach for no fucking reason and also it's not actually IN the movies! It doesn't count!)

The Nubian handmaidens are a cool concept, but they're all background characters, who barely get named. We don't get to actually see them and Padmé do a lot of on-screen work together. She doesn't get to confide in them regarding her love or her fears. She speaks to her guard captain more onscreen than her handmaidens.

And while we do see female members of the Jedi Order in the films, they're ALSO all background characters, like Jocasta Nu and Aayla Secura and Yaddle. As opposed to more active Jedi characters like Qui-Gon Jinn or Mace Windu. Like, damn, the prequels are the perfect opportunity to introduce and show off even a female Jedi supporting character, and they just did not do that. That sucks. The careless absence of women in this universe sucks. The careless absence of women as significant characters in these films sucks.

Every other piece of additional material for "Star Wars" has to move to patch this. The "Jedi Apprentice" and "Jedi Quest" novels strive to add and name female agemates and mentors. "The Clone Wars" television shows add Ahsoka as a protagonist and Ventress as a villain and a whole bunch of new female characters.

Yes, given that these are prequels, there are some characters who are not really realistically changeable. (Yes, trans people exist, obviously, that would be very cool; not sure that "Star Wars" was going to go for that back in 1999.) Obi-Wan. Anakin. Yoda. The Emperor. Unnamed Sad Mother of Luke and Leia. You need those ones. EVERYTHING ELSE was up for whatever they wanted to do.

So, anyway, I'm currently thinking about characters you could potentially genderbend without affecting the story pretty much at all. Qui-Gon, obviously. Mace Windu, as well. I think fandom would then hate both of these characters even more then, unfortunately, because fandom is what it is. Whatever legitimate criticisms levied at both of these imperfect characters would have increased tenfold, I am certain of it. But we're talking about the prequels's badly executed stories, not fandom's misogyny. (And misogynoir. A black woman as the leader of the Jedi Order when it was destroyed by the Sith? Fandom would have been even more of a fucking nightmare.) It would suck that they both die, but the prequels are a tragedy anyway, so, eh.

Bail's role in the prequels could have potentially been played by Breha Organa instead. Although, I don't know how well the Extended Universe novels had extended Leia's backstory by that point in time, maybe Bail had already been established as the Senator and Breha as Queen, so maybe not. At the very least, you could have had Mon Mothma in there doing his superspy stuff with him or something. Padmé's guard captain could have been a woman.

Both Darth Maul and Count Dooku could have been women. Yes, they're both evil, and yes, they both die, so it's not perfect on the representation front. But it's something, especially if you balance that out with some good characters, and look, I can't coherently complete this thought, I keep getting distracted by the mental image of hot evil Sith ladies. I think a female Count Dooku would have kicked ass, honestly, as much as I enjoy Christopher Lee in the role.

My main goal with this thought exercise is purely upping the number of plot-relevant female characters, pointing out that it wouldn't have been hard to add more women without changing all that much if anyone involved had actually bothered to think about that.

The original trilogy only mentioned "The Clone Wars", so the clone army didn't all need to be copies of Jango Fett. There could have potentially been a half-dozen genetic donors, with the Kaminoans creating different clone soldiers for different purposes. Some of them could have been clones of women. (I hold the unpleasant headcanon that the clone soldiers are all sterile (or functionally sterile, incompatible with unmodified humans) anyway, because the Kaminoans don't want clients to be able to "steal" their work.) And the clones are actually a fairly minor role in the films themselves, admittedly, not given any more development than any of the droids (it's the show that does the work), but again, it's still something more.

[ohhicas]

i noticed a decrease of LexZex art on twitter in the last couple months (there’s only a handful of artists and i take every crumb i can get haha) so i wandered into the tag and saw so many people dragging the ship, it was disheartening 😔😔 i saw your name mentioned or at least vague tweeted a couple times and i just wanna say even if the antis make online spaces uncomfortable for “bad ship” artists, there are always people supporting your art from the sidelines! don’t let the haters stop you from doing what you love, you’re doing god’s work with this ship! ˚‧º·(′̥̥̥ o ‵̥̥̥)‧º·˚

Hi anon! First up, I know how you feel-- to my knowledge I only know of like two other artists for this ship (both JP; people I'm friendly with) so when one goes missing, it certainly feels like a Void.

As far as people in the tags go; there's a very good reason why I never venture Into the tags, even at the start of my venture into KH. I don't even check my own Username tag because I saw something, once, and went "yknow what, nah". Some people are rancid for just the reason of having a squick towards a pairing with age gap-- despite most of their claims (Zexion being a minor; he's not, by an interview that lists all the Org minus Rox as 20+) (Aeleus being his 'father figure'; he's not. Ienzo has never listed Aeleus as a Father figure, when he lists his parental/mentors [They are listed as AtW, with a mocking commentary about Even's behavior towards him.]) just being headcanon. They spread this like it's canon, and use it as ammo to hurt strangers because they saw something they don't like and threw a fit, like a child being introduced to bitter vegetables. I never understood why they didn't just block, mute, move on. Rather, they'll openly vaguetweet, spread hate, and even screencap and go after users who don't use English as a first language leading to fear and hiding, with "is it safer if I just delete?" worries for their bullying behavior. [<- real situation! I had to speak a friend down from a metaphorical cliff over this!]

This kind of atmosphere does tend to kill a creative drive when someone is just enjoying a Kingdom Hearts fan-ship. I've never personally let these people get to me, but I'll admit I 'fell victim' to drawing for other fandoms and getting kinder commentary and reactions. (That's where I've been! Other fandoms crawled in and took over my mental space since it was kinder to engage in them.) (this also killed my urge to draw for KH at all. Not just the pairing I still love a lot and think of often, but in closed spaces with friends.)

So thank you for this message! It was nice to hear. I don't have any advice for anyone who wants to see more art from artists they love beyond "Support them", even if it's scary. If you support something and want to see more of it, openly support it.

Anyway that's my soapbox adulting for the evening. Thank you for giving me a reason to dust off my shaky skillset for them and draw them again.

[utilitycaster]

#reblogging for the “see: girlfailure” tag#caus I have opinions on the insular fandom memeification of characters but I don't - as this post highlights - have the words for it#but I keep those to dms caus anytime I or a friend has challenged it in a public space it gets shot down#it reeks of my troubles with the general fear of using the word woman these days and how it's girldinner this girlmath that#also what do you call as intentional character traits vs a flopped dice roll

(via @distant--shadow)

so I agree and this is interesting to me because what always frustrated me about "girlfailure" outside the more general issue of "um, coquette/bimbo/girl dinner/uwu soft divine feminine cottagecore domesticity don't you mean u want to braid her hair is actually TRUER feminism than being the surly woman who loves math and sword fights and hates sewing" and the fact that, as you said, it mostly came from bungled dice rolls and no real intent, is that the same people who call her a girlfailure insist that Imogen is the main character. And like, she kind of is! And yet - and I've said this about Imogen and Laudna in the context of their relationship but I'm going to not include that because I actually don't think that's even relevant, it's about them as individual characters as well - people want them to simultaneously be The Main Character or at least heavily in focus and also never, ever have any agency. Like, they want "capable" to mean that everyone likes you, and not that you are a person who makes hard choices for the better.

Maybe it's because I'm playing Baby's First RPG right now, but the deal with RPGs and I think(?) especially this one, is you must make every choice and it is laden with consequences (not that I as a D&D player, or, you know, a human woman, am unfamiliar with that already) but what drives me nuts about the just a silly guy! girlfailure! she chooses to be good and therefore is good narrative for Imogen, and the "stripped of choice" (another highly repeated turn of phrase) for both her and Laudna is that it's untrue and it means nothing. For all my criticism of What Doesn't Break, Laudna makes choices. I frequently dislike them and wish they had more gravity, but she does make them. She doesn't make every choice - notably, her death and Delilah's presence are huge things that happen to her without her input - but even while barely herself she frequently brushes off Delilah. You can imagine the dialogue trees and the paths she takes, to intervene or not. She decides to renew her pact; she decides to run into the desert. Imogen decides to attack the villagers with lightning to defend Laudna. She decides to leave, she decides to keep burning their rivals in the Twilight Mirror Museum, she decides to tell her mother that she won't join her, she decides not to help assassinate her mother.

Fearne has a wonderful line when she's talking with Chetney after shardgate, in which she explains that she's terrified of making bad choices. Not of being a bad person, but of making the bad choices. And that's the thing. You cannot choose to be good. You cannot choose to be bad. At least not in any general sense. You can, however, make choices that harm people or help them. You constantly must do this. You can stray, or change the type of choices you've made, but they do accumulate to a point, eventually, where it becomes harder and harder to stray. However, the premise of D&D is very much that your character hasn't become locked in, yet. Is Imogen making choices that will be better for other people? If the world rests on her shoulders, is she making better choices for the world?

This is perhaps the core theme of this campaign, dating as far back as Downfall. Aeor made their choice - many, many choices. The gods made theirs. Ludinus kept making his, over, and over. It's particularly resonant among the women of the campaign. Obviously there's Fearne, and I've covered Imogen and Laudna, but going over to the Crown Keepers, Morrigan becomes a paladin in a few short weeks - an immense choice. Fy'ra advises others on what they are going to do. And Opal is where she is now because in one moment she put the crown on her head - and in doing so, ceded further choice in the long run. The deities of both fate and free will in this world are given considerable presence in this story, and both use female pronouns.

Maybe I'm making a mountain of a molehill, but I don't think I am. I really do think people cling to "girlfailure" and act like we're just being meanie haters who don't believe Imogen is good because she can be the central character who has power to change the world and the narrative; or she can be pure and innocent of all wrongdoing. she cannot be both. No one can. And deep down I think the "girlfailure" proponents prefer a useless innocent girl to a powerful woman who sometimes makes choices or does things that hurt other people. So I don't think that one's just harmless meme-ing, and if you want to see Imogen as an exceptionally important part of this narrative I think you have to reject the girlfailure, and anyone saying "oh it's just a joke" is either unthinkingly repeating or is pushing a story where Imogen is just a MacGuffin without agency, and neither is worth, in my opinion, listening to. Someone "stripped of choice" in real life is worth our pity and deserves our assistance but they make for a pretty terrible fantasy protagonist, and it's maddening to see a woman in the center of the story and then to be attacked if you want her to be treated like a person who, as a result of being a key protagonist, holds particular power and isn't just a girlfailure.

[frikatilhi]

About that new interview. I now feel conflicted about my bojere shipping. Like, I'd NEVER send Bojan fucking letters about it (WTF is wrong with people??? I'm actually shocked), but does even the concept of it bother him for real, or is he okay with it as long as it's just fun and games (and not shoved in his face)? The Cyprus vacation took place after the interview and he didn't post anything about it himself. But he let Jere post at least a little bit and it was all extremely bojere heavy (i'm assuming they talked about it and bojan agreed that jere could post the things he did). So am I "allowed" to enjoy my little fanarts and fanfics about them (emphasis on fan FICTION) or should i feel bad and fear that i'm ruining a really special friendship, because some people take it way too far? 😅 From everything we've seen so far, I'm assuming that Jere does not mind the shipping (at least as long as it stays somewhat playful and not too serious). I really hope that it won't get to the point where we get no bojere content at all (even in just a friendship sense) bc some people ruined it for all of us. 🙁

RPF is fine taking the F to the RP's is not

my tl;dr under here

It's okay to feel conflicted about this stuff; we don't want to cause any harm! It's not a nice feeling to think our silliness here might make some wacko think they're on to something and inspire them to spew hate at anyone. But Bojan gets all kinds of shit thrown at him a lot, so if it wasn't this it would probably be something else, and everyone really is only responsible for their own actions. Keep it in fandom spaces and don't start believing your delulus are real, that's rpf 101.

I feel like regarding shipping the crux of it is here. After mentioning Käärijä he sort of backtracks a little: ”I’m not even talking about this situation [bojere] at all but in general, about all the lies that are being spread.” 

I personally get the feeling that his beef is not about the Käärijä stuff as such, but with how lies and rumours take off online and how it results in harassment. Like how he gets letters from some wacko saying how he’s a horrible person for ignoring Jere, while in reality he’s on the phone with Jere at that same moment.

Is he against shipping in general, does it bother him? I don't think we can tell either way based on this interview. In the past both of them have seemed pretty chill about it, but who knows. If people harrass him about it, I can imagine it could get tiresome.

But he keeps speaking so fondly of his fans, and international fans, and Finland, and Jere, that I get a strong feeling that he doesn't lump us all together but is only speaking of those who "can't separate reality from entertainment". Also, based on how they talk of each other, their friendship is not affected by this but they're able to support each other when things get tough.

So I'd say, anon, that you're still "allowed" to enjoy your entertainment, as much as I'm allowed to grant you that permission 😆

[ghostedgrim]

Fandom Etiquette

It has come to my attention that today's fandoms just keep turning toxic, getting created and ruined within a week, and the etiquette we used to follow like law is vanishing. More and more people, especially minors, are joining fandoms, and they don't know the etiquette or unofficial rules that we once went by.

These "rules" are merely what I have observed through the years.

1) Understand what a fandom is- A fandom is a SAFE SPACE where people can talk about a show/movie/game/book + characters within it that they like. It is a space where people can be free to make headcannons, self-inserts, ocs, memes, shit posts, create and share theories, create fanart and fanfics.

2)Respect - If you don't want something happening to you, then don't do it to others. More directly: don't hate on other people for their preferences of reading, writing, and characters they like. So if someone likes character A because of __ but you like character B, that doesn't give you the right of hating on the other person fit liking character A. If a person sets a boundary: "I won't write _ _ and _," then don't push them to write it.

✨️Jingle Jingle ✨️sparkles✨️lemme keep your attention✨️✨️✨️✨️✨️✨️✨️✨️✨️✨️

3) Creators of a fandom (people who created the characters, movie, book etc that you like).- If they request something, respect it. "Please don't sexulize this character" so don't sexualize them. Do not force a creator into a fandom, don't be sending them fanart, graphic contents, threats to get a specific ship you want, etc. They are a person, treat them like one, if they want to be in the fandom and interact with it they will do it in their own time, don't force them.

4) 18+ spaces! 🔞- Now minors, I NEED you to understand this part. A person with 18+, 🔞 or MDNI (minors do not interact), don't interact ESSPECALLY if it's a group chat, discord, and/or rolepay. I emphasize this FOR YOUR SAFETY! As a minor, you can easily get groomed, no matter how safe it seems adult predators are there and will make you feel like they are the safest person to be around before they attack (I did an essay on this just a few months ago, trust me it's bad). Some people make an 18+ space because they fear a they cannot prevent a predator from going after minors who enter that space (predators will often be your friend before they attacked via grooming).

5) 18+ pt2- Many people create an 18+ space so they can talk about more adult related topics, or simply because they find it easier to talk to people their age when speaking about fandom related topics. Also it's weird being like 20 and agreeing with a 12 y/o that a character is hot, it's extremely uncomfortable for us adults when we realize we're having that conversation with a kid.

⚠️NEVER PRETEND TO BE 18+ IF YOU'RE UNDER 18 BECAUSE THEN THE ADULT YOU'RE TALKING TO WILL NOT REALIZE YOU'RE A MINOR, YALL TALK ABOUT ADULT CONTENT, MOM/DAD CATCHES YOU AND THEN THE INNOCENT ADULT GOES TO JAIL AND/OR BECOMES A REGISTERED CHILD PREDATOR!!⚠️

6) MDNI and 18+ tags!- These are warnings that a topic in a post is NOT CHILD FRIENDLY!! Also us adults can get in trouble if a child interacts with our 18+ content- a parent could see, report us, get us banned and possibly worse scenarios depending on the situation. Also adults don't want children reading 🌽, graphic violence etc.

✨️✨️💥✨️✨️stay with me now✨️✨️💥✨️✨️

7) Shit posts💕- I have not seen them in ages and I miss them. A shit post is just a funny, likely cringey thing you make at like 3am. They're funny, stupid, meant to make everyone laugh and cringe, they're not meant to be pretty. It can be headcannons like "Thrawn from star wars sucks at painting that's why he only admires art!!" Or self insert x character doing something stupid. Crack fics are some of the funniest things because you can read it and wonder if the person who made it was high in that moment. They're like memes.

8) Self Insert OCs- Idc if you hate them because guess what, a person has a right to create them, Hell a person has every right to make a fanfic with them. Yes, you're allowed to feel distaste when you see them, but don't give hate, it's stupid to hate on something so harmless. I got maladaptive daydreaming, and while it may be boring in a fanfic, I find may daydreams much more entertaining when I have powers and a backstory that's fictional.

9) Warnings- Put warnings on your post if it contains; violence, sa, abuse, sh, sickness, vomiting, and any other possibily triggering thing even I'd it seems stupid put the warning there please ✨️

10) Pro-shipping- If you do this you're not welcome, and leave the fandom. For those who don't know, these people support minor x adult ships, incest ships, dad/mother x their child ship, abuser x victim ships and likely sa ships too. There is no excuse, if you support them, make art, fanfics, headcannons, get out and leave the fandom. If you're so desperate for it then go make a bot for it on character ai. 👋 bye

10.5) If you make headcannons or stories romanticizing a character 🍇ing, and or sa and or abusing y/n, or another character you ship them with (especially if it's a minor x adult 🤢), get tf out. If you romanticize yourself sa, 🍇ing and/or abusing a character (especially if it's a minor) get tf out. LEAVE THE FANDOM

✨️Almost done, just a little further my friends✨️💕

11) Help support the people writing fanfics, writing isn't always easy, so leave the author a comment or preferably reblog it, it helps motivate them to write and keeps the fandom alive

12) Don't be toxic, it kills a fandom. Unless a person's opinions or creations are harmful just leave them alone if you don't like it.

13) Don't glorify Ai art, all the faces and smiles look identical babe, go for art created by a person. 100%

14) Don't whitewash

15) be inclusive

✨️ If you wanna read a story with multiple chapters you can find them on whattpad and Ao3. Ao3 is better at filtering out unwanted content and finding certain content you want. Tumblr fanfics are mostly oneshots, but multiple chapter stories do exist.✨️

16) Give support to authors writing multiple chapter stories bc those are hard af to make! Support via: Tumbler: reblog and comment. Ao3: kudos and comment. Whattpad: comment, and vote for it.

17) SUPPORT FANART ARTISTS! With Ai their motivation to create has weakened. Fancfictions and fanart are both vital in keeping fandoms alive, and artists are do much better at art than Ai. And we love the little comics the artists make, so give em some love

18) Cosplay- we all have to start somewhere and cosplay is expensive af. So support rather than critisize, and provide tips to help them (where to find affordable good materials, how to sew, good glues etc)

19) Writing is hard, some people like me are dyslexic and not everyone has English as their native language, ontop of that with grammarly (Ai based autocorrect) it's harder to notice mistakes and the autocorrect will also make incorrect corrections.

You made it!!!! I'm proud!!! Feel free to reblog, comment, and even copy then repost to spread the word, feel free to add, and summarize. People can't magically learn fandom etiquette, we have to teach them. Especially the minors

Now go be the weird nerds we all are 👋

[bleachbleachbleach]

Hiiiii, re ur post abt goals and the whole being more active in the community thing -- I'll try to remember to interact with u more than just liking/reblogging things! I've been super quiet on my own blog since I had burnout two years ago but I'm trying to get back into doing more than just occasionally posting fic, and honestly I love a lot of ur head canon posts and metas etc. I probably won't read any of ur fic because I'm a Bit Weird in that for some reason I hate reading fic in the fandoms I write for (but still love metas and headcanons? Brains sure are weird) but everything else I'll try to actually Write Words instead of letting my thoughts stay in my head!

This is such a sweet message! <3333333

I would totally welcome conversation, and it’s great to know that you are open to it, too. Because I feel like Tumblr as a platform runs on a parallel play model on purpose, and most people probably just want to do that, and my hesitation in going full throttle about using Tumblr the way I would want is my fear that it is going to be obnoxious/overbearing/overwhelming (e.g. driving people to madness via “Why is this person talking to me… I didn’t want to talk to them...”).

It’s so funny you should say that, re: enjoying hcs/meta but not fanfic in your writing fandoms, because I think about that divide a lot! Half the time I spend writing most* headcanon posts is actually time spent workshopping “sooooo…. how do I say this without saying ‘well, in my fanfic…’” because it’s probably something I already wrote in fanfic or notes for fanfic, but 1) I want to talk to people about it, and the chances that I will get to if it’s written in a fanfic are fairly slim, and 2) I want to hear other people’s versions of it, too. In their fanfic, if they write fanfic, but also their posts or tags!

But that can be complicated because in my mind, [insert headcanon post topic] tends to be fairly situated in context—the context of fic things having happened, or things that are going to happen, or thematic undercurrents/relationships—so it becomes a project in trying to make the proposition NOT sound completely bananas without that context/something being written in a particular way. Which can sometimes be its own kind of fun and is sometimes like “good grief, I could have simply been writing more fanfic!” (I feel like I should emphasize here that no one should feel obligated to read my fanfic. I mean, I want people to want to read it! But I very much do not want anyone to feel like they Have To or like they need to explain why they’re not!)

Our approaches are opposite, in that my brain is fanfic forward, both for myself and for others’ fanfic. But I do feel like a lot of RP blogs share your orientation re: not wanting to read other versions of the character they write for! I don’t know if this is where you, specifically, are coming from, but I’ve read on some of the RP blogs that it has a lot to do with having a strong investment in their own particular color on things, and wanting that centered and front of mind. (Which isn’t to say that sentiment isn’t true of most people, I think, because otherwise they wouldn’t write them that way—it’s true of me—but ymmv on how much someone wants to see the other iterations.)

For me, I know that I’m a lot less adventurous about Interpretations That Excite Me for my blorbos than other characters I might read for. Like, to use a silly example, in my mind Soi Fon is 100% Lesbian (which stands out in my headcanon space because I generally assume most everyone in Bleach would be on some level willing to get down with most anyone else), but did I click on Soi Fon/Vegeta when I came across it anyway? Absolutely I did. I barely know who Vegeta is. But my down-to-clown boundaries with Soi Fon are very low, nearly tabula rasa, so go get Vegeta, girl!!!! Whereas for like, Hitsugaya, I’m probably not going to read Hitsugaya/Vegeta because I am not actually a crossover person, my knowledge of DBZ is limited to The Osmotic Experience of Having Grown Up in the 90s, and my favorite version of Hitsugaya’s sex life is the absence of one.

*Of course, there are other headcanons posts in the omake/filler vein that are simply too dumb (affectionate) for me to want to write full fanfic of, like the Gotei regatta or the Gotei bowling league, or that “I think the average shikai user would probably be pretty good at driving a car but they would NOT be considerate or lawful users of said car” post.

[vynxwave]

Sorry for this vent ask but I feel like I'm losing my mind seeing this: not me returning to the Earthspark tag to see what people were thinking of the trailer and stuff and immediately regretting it LMAO I'm really wishing that people who called the first third of the season garbage had just quit, because if they hated good episodes and don't understand the show as it is, they'll hate the next batch if it's also good and I'm not looking forward to the reception! I'm disappointed that it's like the book has been written on the beginning of the season. It's making me kinda spiteful/toxic and actively hope for things the fandom would hate to happen. How are you feeling about the fandom right now as the s2a lover & understander lol - arceespinkgun

I'm having the same experience as you looking at the fandom. Like holy shit, all of the complaints/fears are so baseless it's irritating.

I've seen people fearing that the Chaos Terrans' deaths won't be acknowledged/mourned... for some reason? It's such nonsense and completely ignorant of the strong family theme in EarthSpark and how it deals with interpersonal relationships/conflict, and the fact EarthSpark does reference/mention earlier events. That's not even mentioning that the Maltos are literally shown to care about them.

I've seen lots of people hoping that their headcanons come true and... I really think people need to understand that EarthSpark isn't written like how fanworks are written. I feel like for EarthSpark's fandom it's such a prevalent mindset, for some reason? I don't mean this in a sense of 'it's bad to have headcanons' but rather people should see the show for what it actually presents and be able to understand why the show goes how it does.

Like, characters aren't just doing things — they're also tools used by the narrative to convey messages, themes, and morals.

It's so weird how people have been treating S2a as if it's a whole season, even before S2b was decided to be called S3. I hope people will understand that S3 is functionally S2b when it releases.

Also, the complaints about the animation quality are so overblown. The animation in the trailer and S2a's looks great to me.

People hate Decepticons being antagonists, they hate Chaos Terrans being antagonists, they hate humans being antagonists... it's so weird. It really would not have made sense for the Quintessons to come so early in the season (S2a). The Quintesson Executioner appearing, though, does make sense appearing so early because it helps set up for the Quintessons to arrive later, as does Terratronus.

In S1 there was not set up for Quintessons to arrive in S2. There was, however, set up for Terratronus with Mandroid alluding to her in S1E25-26 The Last Hope with "... you have no idea the power that's been lying beneath your base all these years" "Showing you the weapon it's perched upon" when he uses the CyberSlayer on the Space Bridge. Then in S2E01 Aftermath Starscream says "Beneath Witwicky lies a tremendous weapon" which calls back to Mandroid's allusion to Terratronus; and when Starscream is talking to the Decepticons about making New Cybertron in S2E09 Witwicky the framing calls back to Mandroid's moment again when the Witwicky Tower (the defunct Space Bridge) is in frame — where we know Terratronus lies beneath.

Like, the way the series is building up to the Quintessons is great and cohesive if you look at the actual story that's being told!

Chances are the scripts for these next episodes were finished before S2a was released, so I really hope I don't hear an utterance of "retcon!" or "they fixed xyz!" when these episodes are released.

EarthSpark S2b/S3 will be great and I hold no reservations about it, regardless of the rest of the fandom.

There's so many weird fears about what characters might not be present... like y'all... the trailer did not show everybody. The entire cast not being in some episodes/shots or synopsis does not mean xyz characters won't appear.

Honestly, a lot of what I read from people makes me wonder how much people understand about how to analyze media or how series are written. Like, I'm no king of analysis or whatever myself, but why are people unable to understand why certain choices or directions are made? It's weird how people are acting as if S2a is just sooo incongruent with S1 when that's really not the case at all if you go back and look — truly, like you said, it makes me wonder why people keep sticking around if they hate the story being told. I mentioned characters being tools of the narrative, and it really feels like people don't understand that when they're analyzing EarthSpark.

I'm currently reading Marvel UK G1 Transformers and EarthSpark's S1 established the Decepticons with such similar, or even verbatim, sentiments. But even without them the Decepticons' perspective in the show was clear to me.

Is it really surprising the Decepticons, who never valued/liked Earth or its inhabitants or the Autobots or the Maltos/Terrans, would fight the Autobots and Maltos/Terrans for the Embershards — the Embershards, which are key to building/securing themselves a new home (so promises Starscream)? It feels like people don't consider the characters' perspectives and their relation to the world/others around them when it's such an important part of analysis. And the necessity of conflict in a story.

I really don't understand how people thought the Decepticons would've turned good following S1... like it wouldn't have been warranted/earned. Now in S2b/S3, the episode synopses don't suggest the Decepticons and Autobots/Maltos/Terrans have a continued competition for anything; we do, however, see Breakdown punching SkullCruncher in the trailer which is very curious — given the setting, he's likely defending Bumblebee. I have seen people mention Aftermath in relation to Breakdown, and yeah, I wonder what Breakdown'll make of Aftermath's cruel death — some have wondered if he'll defect.

Really the main episodes I've seen people talking positively of are Breakdown & Bumblebee's and Prowl's.

It's so insane looking at a fandom and seeing a lack of actual fans and people just... not understanding the story. Hard being the S2a lover & understander in a world full of S2a haters & misconstruers! I genuinely cannot escape mentions of EarthSpark without people's dislike of S2a being the default opinion, and it's so frustrating! I know that if people do end up liking this batch of episodes, they'll follow it up with a "better than S2" which'll be annoying because S2a is the set up for S2b/S3.

I don't really have much to say about the trailer myself as I'm happy with what it shows because it looks interesting and the episode synopses sound great. The character I'm most excited for personally is Megatron, but I'll be enjoying all the others as well.

[autistic-ben-tennyson]

Anakin: Why I relate to him

I’m going to change gears a bit from my usual anime/Ben 10 posts to talk about Anakin. I had a period where I pretended to hate him and was super pro Jedi to try and fit in with that fandom. I have changed a lot of my opinions since then. While I’m still not a huge fan of him, my opinion has softened greatly. A lot of Jedi stans act like all people who sympathize with him are conservatives who think you need a 50s nuclear family to be happy and hate Buddhism or aroace people. So I am going to share why I relate to this man’s struggles as a progressive, transgender neurodivergent Asian American.

A lot of people view Anakin in AOTC as just whiny and ungrateful. While the Tusken massacre was wrong, I can emphasize with his anger towards Obi Wan. I have felt belittled, over patronized and gaslit by my father, as well as yelled at. While Anakin was being disrespectful in that scene from AOTC where he reunites with Padme, the way Obi Wan handled it was uncalled for. He should have pulled Anakin aside to let him know there’s a time and place for everything, not humiliate him in front of their hosts.

I’ve made small mistakes due to my autism and dad would make a big deal out of it and tell me “we need to work on your awareness” in front of everyone there. I can also relate to that “he’s jealous! He’s holding me back” scene as someone who wants more out of life and feel like my dad is getting in my way. That scene also reminds me of how a lot of parents treat their kids for having an “attitude” or “talking back” when they’re just trying to explain themselves, are having a bad day or have a different opinion. I’ve also been forced to apologize for lashing out at people who’ve bullied me like in that comic.

When Jedi apologists talk about how Anakin was just greedy for not wanting to share his feelings with Obi Wan or the council, I get the feeling that they’ve had a fairly privileged upbringing. I’ve had trouble opening up to my dad because of how dismissive or terrifying he could be in the past. As a trans person, I’ve had to prepare for the worst possible outcomes and while my coming out went better than I expected, he just invalidated all my fears and acted like I was wrong for not telling him when he did little to provide a safe space, never apologizing for insensitive things he said. Similarly, fans expect Anakin to tell Obi Wan about his marriage despite all the dismissive behavior from him as well as faking his death and doing little to help Ahsoka. People who’ve been gaslit or dismissed for their feelings often resort to keeping secrets as a safety measure.

A child shouldn’t be expected to tell adults anything until they prove they can be trusted. Whenever I talk about my issues with my childhood, people dismiss it as legitimate discipline or tough love, which is another reason why I feel uncomfortable when Jedi apologists act like Kenobi was a good parent. People only see abuse if it’s physical or sexual, but never care or notice if it’s more subtle or emotional. Anakin recognized that Kenobi’s training methods wouldn’t be good for Ahsoka which is why he acts more like Shmi when teaching Ahsoka. My dad is also very sarcastic and is aware of my autism, even praising it at times, but expects me to just understand his “jokes” or insensitive comments.

People say you can’t critique the Jedi because they’re based off eastern philosophy but are they really that different from conservative evangelicals? Obi Wan straight up tells Anakin he can have romantic feelings but can’t act on them. Fans claim Anakin chose to get married and it was on him for not just leaving. I remember being the “weird” kid in a community that was very conservative (family, faith and football) who felt like I couldn’t talk about my interests without being shamed, especially after coming out. I can also emphasize with wanting to leave but feeling an obligation to stay because the people who’ve hurt me do love me and it being complicated.

I think a lot of people who dismiss Obi Wan’s insensitive remarks or child rearing methods are looking at it from an adult’s perspective, since they aren’t bothered by it as much. Adults can yell at, gaslight, spank or humiliate their kids, then act like nothing happened, but when you’re a child, it sticks with you, and is irritating when they try to be “buddy-buddy” with you later. I am also someone who struggles a lot with sarcasm and struggle with letting go of negative emotions because it keeps happening.

This is that post I talked about where I asked a popular Jedi stan their views on adoption. I’m not anti adoption, mind you. I felt Matilda, Suzume and Kung Fu Panda tackled it well with sensitivity. I responded with decency and acted like I agreed with them. But something about their response gave me the ick. I don’t know why but I do have a desire to find my birth mother, eventually. Is it really wrong to worry about your mother if she could be suffering, and you can’t do anything to help? It kind of confirms that a lot of Jedi apologists come from privileged upbringings. I also felt like I had to ask permission to enjoy media that went against the Jedi fandom’s beliefs.

I think that wraps up why I relate to this character even if I don’t agree with his actions. People who say he was just lazy or selfish don’t seem like they understand much about human psychology and abuse and how even “small” things can build up and make a child distrust the adults in their life. I worry a bit about when they become parents and what how their kids will end up. A lot of kids are shamed for not wanting to share their emotions when they have good reasons to keep secrets. How would Jedi stans respond to that? They only care about abuse if it’s physical which is why they make a big deal out of that training scene from TOTJ or act like Anakin abused Rex when throwing him off that wall on Geonosis.

[im-a-hoping-beetch]

In all honesty, idk what happened with the fandom recently for it to suddenly shit out a ton of crappy takes in ATLA most especially for Zutara. I often find myself defending Zutara because a lot of its antis say the most racist and sexist stuff against it. I'm not even a Zutara fan! I'm a rareshipper.

Can't just antis simply say they don't like Zutara and move on to enjoying their own ships instead? No more stupid holier art thou morality takes that just backfire on their faces.

If they want discourse, then use canon material NOT HEADCANONS, FANONS, OR FANFICS as "evidence" to back up their takes. Antis that do that makes my head spin in exasperation. Then you point that out they start whining how you hurt their feelibgs and get all offended as a "minority".

Actually, let's focus on that last bit. It's pretty rancid too how sometimes they pretend to be part of the "minority" so they can use it as a shield for themselves when their bad behavior gets called out. In fact, this tactic hurts the actual minorities who have valid concerns about Zutara. They get drowned out by all the insanity toxic shippers say and get lumped in with them.

Well, with the new live-action coming, there has obviously, been a revival, making the fandom way much more active. Which leads to people having more time to pay attention to the show and all its intricacies.

This is where ship wars come into play. And in all honesty, atla’s ship wars have definitely left a legacy in a way I don’t think we’ll have to ever witness. With the creators perpetuous jabs at zutara solidifying antis need to hate on it and the fans, fuelling the whole thing to another level. To this day whenever something avatar related gets announced or released you start to see a revival of a not so dead ship war. And while they (probably, not sure) aren’t as brutal as they used to be, they have took another turn, with this faux-progressivism being used to fear monger zutara shippers as well as casual listeners about the ship’s legitimacy. I recommend @i-d-e-g-a-f ‘s post about it to get more insight.

On my part, if I were to pin point the moment where this faux- progressivism started taking space in a lot of anti-zutara takes, I’d say that the atla renaissance isn’t innocent for this phenomenon happening. You need to understand the context in which atla’s release on Netflix took place in. One where the blm movement took the entire world by storm. Resulting in people not having the reservations they’ve probably had in the past when it came to talking about racial issues. This was followed by the emergence of numerous movements involving similar cases (not identical, tho). As well as media and the people consuming said media being ready to offer commentary on and call out harmful depictions of racial minorities as well as the rethorics they carried.

Suddenly, anyone and everyone could offer their piece of mind on harm being caused to racial minorities. And while good, it also came with its downside.

When you take into account this context, I think it exacerbated the already existing phenomenon of people saying things in order to put on this front of being good and virtuous, yet failing or simply not wanting to realize how these things are perpetuating the very harm they claim they want to undo. You know, people perceiving and claiming zutara to be a colonized-colonizer ship. As well as comparing katara to Pocahontas, when talking about these two. Which, if these people actually cared about progress, they would know how incredibly racist and sexist it is to make that comparison.

When it comes to antis obsession with hating on zutara, I think it stems from a certain insecurity. You gotta understand that unlike any other non-canon ship, zutara could’ve legitimately been canon. It was constantly talked about in the writers room, many of the team members seriously considering it (head writers, voice actors etc..) Hence why, the creators felt the need to throw numerous jabs (ie. the ember island play, (2008) comic-con) at the ship and more specifically, its fans. Since they themselves were insecure. @burst-of-iridescent perfectly explains it in this post.

[callmehere-iwillappear]

20 Questions For Fic Writers

this has been sitting in my drafts for probably months and i actually don't remember who tagged me at this point sorry </3

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

26

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

168,724

3. What fandoms do you write for?

currently just rise but i've had some other fandoms i've written for in the past

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

call me here (i will appear) Use Only For Intended Purpose The Idiot's Guide to Blindfold Chess new phone who dis because i fear i'm lost (and i cannot be found again) wow big surprise(/s) all of these are rise al;jfldksjfkd

5. Do you respond to comments?

i try to but uh </3 i am not very good at it

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

ummm. probably waiting for answers, wasting time bc even if u know the comfort and healing comes there very much isn't any in the fic itself so whoops </3 i am not good at hurt/no comfort so i don't. have a lot of fics that would really qualify

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

uuhhhhh ig fibonacci? most of my fics have relatively happy endings and. this is the one with the least angst overall so

8. Do you get hate on fics?

not yet thank god

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

i do not alfjdlkjfkdls

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

imma keep it real with you chief most of the crossovers that i've written are with other people's aus and idk if that counts

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

not that i know of fingers crossed

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

nope

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

yeesssss? sorta? it's not like, on ao3 but i've done some collab crossover stuff with friends (see aforementioned crossover question)

14. What’s your all time favourite ship?

god idk. i don't do a lot of shipping these days sorry </3 i have some ships i think are cute but i'm not like, into them enough to say they really qualify

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

i want to finish idiot's guide and cmh very very badly and i refuse to jinx it. idk abt npwd solely because of like the type of fic it is, idk if it'll ever be finished finished yk. like there'll always be more little scenes i can do

16. What are your writing strengths?

um. i've been told i'm good at character voice

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

sweats nervously

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

i don't really do it? i probably wouldn't unless it was like, just a couple words - i don't mind too much when other ppl do it bc i have a translation extension on my laptop but i don't have many options when i'm on my phone

19. First fandom you wrote for?

doctor who........ i was like. god idek. fifteen? maybe younger i straight up don't remember <- also none of this is on ao3 this was like, back in my ff.net days and i don't think i even remember my login lmao

20. Favourite fic you’ve written?

hmm hm hm. okay. probably because i fear i'm lost. just bc like... idk i'm proud of how it turned out and i'm really . idk. happy with the reception it got. i'm happy it reached people who can relate to it. and it's short enough that there's not like, enough space for there to be parts where i just have to force myself to write stuff i'm not 100% happy with to fill in the gaps. if that makes sense

tagging: You

[carouselunique]

Is it true that there's no animosity between you and... you know, you know who. You never talk about her in any way. I guess I'm curious. You guys seemed like really close friends and then just weren't friends at all. And there was some stuff she said that seemed very targeted at you...

I don't know if she feels any animosity toward me or not any more. Our mutual friends have said she doesn't and I take them on their word in that regard, assuming that if they have an answer for me it's because they're aware how she feels. I wouldn't know and it's not my place to put words in her mouth.

I haven't spoken to her/about her in a long time and the only time she even crosses my mind is when people bring her up to me. As for me feeling any animosity? I'll admit my feelings on her these days are complicated and way too nuance-core for people who aren't my friends to hear about but I wouldn't call them animosity in any way. I inherently want people my friends care about to live well because I care about my friends, and anyone my friends care about by proxy and I still share friends with her. I would never wish ill on people my friends care about so animosity doesn't fit into that by definition. I'd say I'm hurt more than anything and even then I've worked through a lot of it with trusted friends who have helped me deal with my emotions in a healthy way.

(Besides, my own life struggles keep me from even being able to invest time into animosity. I have to expend that energy loving my family, doing my best to support them during our struggles. And I've never been a hateful person it isn't in me. I would rather play 'Hot To Go' by Chappell Roan and teach my dad how to do the hand gestures to help him strengthen his muscles again than focus on hating anyone...)

I try not to think about her because it hurts. I often think that people forget that I'm a real person outside of her sphere, and that I wouldn't want to talk about what happened because I truly did consider her a friend for a long time. And when someone I consider a friend appears to not regard me with care any more suddenly and I don't even have closure on that... well... it hurts... A lot. Of course I never talk about it.

And I'm not stupid, I have seen some stuff she's said that I've gathered was about me. I remind myself that she has a right to vent in her own spaces and I truly mean that... it's just a shame that her own spaces have people who then have taken these things to me to show me (after all, I wouldn't have even seen these things myself if not for third-party anons going 'this u?') saying it is my own fault because I was a terribly cruel friend or my own fault for not listening to warnings about her when I had the chance and that makes me a stupid gullible bitch. You lot haven't seen some of the awful shit about me from some of her more ravenous fans and haters I've seen over the years that I've had to let roll off my back in the fear it would bring backlash - not even to me, to her. I don't want to be the cause of any hatred going to anyone.

Also I'm just not going to ever talk about the details of our fallen friendship or our fallen relationship. That's private. She might be a public person to some extent but I never was, even if I do gain some measure of small fandom for my work one day I'm just private about personal matters especially raw ones. I almost deleted this ask entirely but Idk I never stated that it bothers me when people talk to me about her from my own mouth, so I guess that's what this ramble is.

If you send me anything about Lily Orchard it will not be addressed. I am not a part of her life not even through our mutual friends. I do not know or care what's going on with her public/personal life. I haven't kept up. I will never keep up. Don't treat me as an extension of the situation because I am not in the situation. In the most plainly stated sense of the word: Leave me the Hell alone. (...pretty please.)

All I've wanted this entire time was to be left alone to process everything in a healthy, peaceful way. I'm workin' on it.

[ace-touya]

Top 10 mha characters I think are underrated

10 - Mustard. I love mustard, I know there’s a group of people who love mustard, but there’s not enough content of him for the rest of the fandom to love him too. If anyone has any mustard headcanons, throw them at me. Right now.

9 - the girls of class 1-A. The only reason they’re at 9 is because, out of everyone on here they’re probably the least underrated. But I swear we’re sleeping on all of them. Putting them individually would take up too many spaces but each and every single one of these girls own my heart.

8 - Monoma. He’s low down just because I know why hes underrated and it’s because his character depth was stolen from him. But he’s so interesting!

7 - Magne. Because I’m mainly in the LOV part of the fandom I do see a lot of Magne but still not as much as I would like. Please talk to me about Magne. Actually talk to me about everyone on here.

6 - Tokoyami. Need i say more? They’re so cool. I have so many headcanons about this funky bird guy. And the RELATIONSHIPS with this guy. Tokoyami and Dark Shadow!! Tokoyami and Izuku!! Tokoyami and Shoji!!! Tokoyami and Tsu!! Tokoyami and Hawks!!!!

5 - Geten. The only MLA character I actually care about honestly. I hate the rest of them, but Geten intrigues me. What is his connection to the rest of the Himura family? How did he end up where he is? Personally I like to think Rei has a sibling and Geten’s their child. I wanna know other people’s theories though! Also the fact he’s really quite young, especially compared to the other MLA members

4 - Tenya Iida. Lawful good class rep guy goes on a feral arc and plots revenge and people don’t talk about him?? Simultaneously a nerd and a jock?? Has an amazing big brother who I also adore?? The family drama with this guy. The body horror with him ripping out his own mufflers that one time. Like. Can we please talk about him more.

3 - Recovery Girl. Where would we be without this woman let’s be real with ourselves. She’s the only one with sense I fear. I’d like to think Izuku is pretty close to her now.

2 - Overhaul. I know there is an overhaul demographic out there however I am worried that they just find him hot. The way his relationship with Eri is just projection??? His connections to Tomura and AFO????

1 - Present Mic. People don’t understand him like I do okay. Please I’m begging he’s so much more than Just There Because Aizawa Is. I ship EraserMic SO MUCH but I NEED you to give him his personality back. Especially in rooftop trio stuff, he gets erased so much and people act like it’s just Oboro and Aizawa.