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cheapshrimpysheep · 2 years ago

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Slide With Me

SUMMARY: Before returning to NRC you show curiosity to know what it's like to ride one of those racing sleds. All the boys offer to show you, inviting you to slide with them. You just need to choose with one you'd like to slide with.

CHARACTERS: Jade Leech, Idia Shroud, Sebek Zigvolt & Epel Felmier

TAGS: Fluf; GN Reader (reader is taller than Epel and shorter than the other three... because so am I ...)

WORD COUNT: An average of 380 words per character.

COMMENTS: I wanted to do something with the Harveston Sledathon theme. Taking advantage of the fact that it finally came on the eng server. And I thought that I would love for them to take me on a ride. I hope you enjoy ;)

Are you sure you want to choose him? Because Octavinelle's boys don't do anything without a deal. Maybe you made one with him without even realizing. Considering how smooth he is with words. Or maybe he'll remind you of this favour he did you when he asks you to accompany him on a hike up a mountain and you hesitate to say yes.

“You should go on front of me.” He will tell you “It will be easier to keep you safe if I am able to see you and if I have my arms by your side. That and, I am sure I'll assume correctly that you would like to enjoy the view.”

When cornering, you'll probably lose your balance and bump in his arms. And feel them around you without taking the hands off the handlebar, like a seat belt. “Are you well?” He’ll check. “Don't fret.I am able to keep my attention both on the mountain and on you. Fu fu.”

“Would you also be interested to know what it's like to jump over a ravine?” He will ask you if you’re having fun.

If you say no or your no sure: “This might be your only chance, you know? And I already jumped it once. I can assure your safety. I would never let you get hurt.” And if you still keep saying no: “*Sigh* Your lack of trust hurts me.” Not really. “But I'll respect your wishes.” He secretly enjoys messing up with you, especially when your afraid of something. But he won't go any further than teasing you.

If you say yes or you were not sure but decided to trust him on this: “Fu fu, I'll make sure you don't regret your decision.” He’ll tell you, amused. He loves it when your down for crazy things. He would get even closer to you, his abdomen on your lower back and his chest on your shoulders and head. If his arms were your seat belt, his torso was the back of your chair. He will not let you get hurt.

His stuffed deer will shameless asking you for petting after the ride. It gently bumps its head on your hip, as if trying to poke you with its rods, but since these are plush they bend when they go against you. “I thinks this is its way of asking for payment for the ride.” Jade deduces.

HIM? Why are you choosing him? He just offered to be polite, you know? Or at least that what he want everybody to think.

When you guys get far enough away from the others, as you get ready to start the ride: “Don't think I don't know why you chose me.” He tells you. But despite your little blush: “You chose me because I have the best racing plush. Smart move.”

“What, no! I choose you for you!” You realize you haven't spoken in your head and cover your mouth with your gloved hand. Both your cheeks and the ends of Idia's hair turned pink. “Y-your bear. Yes, I choose you for your bear, you're right!” You say completely unconvincing. “Should we start the ride now?” Idia nods, embarrassed and flattered at the same time, and finishes preparing the sleigh.

He will suggest you to go in front of him. Since he's the tallest and the expert (although he's only been doing this for a day or two) the safest formation is for the noob going on front of him. What? This is his way to say he cares about you. He doesn't care for other noobs. “Are you sulking because I'm calling you a noob? But you are. Fine, fine, I'll stop.”

He will not go to hard on you. He knows going to hard on a player that is just starting would make them hate a game they could love. The same with the ride. Both are supposed to be fun.

When cornering, you'll probably lose your balance and bump in his arms. And hear one of his "Hiep!" while he tries to protect you with his arms without taking the hands off the handlebar. You know when you almost drop your phone and suddenly realize how precious it is to you? That’s what that "Hiep!" meant.

If you want to go faster, he'll be happy to speed up. He knows that feeling. When you're liking a game so much you want to try the next difficulty. But he will NOT jump over that ravine again. Are you crazy?

His stuffed bear is shy but, after the ride, it will come close to you and nudge your hand with his nose to ask for petting.

HA! Of course you would choose him! Why choose a human... or merman turned into human, when one of your options is a (half) fay young man train by none other than Lilia Vanrouge to be a body-guard of none other than the Greates Malleus Draconia? Looks like your not dumb for a human.

“I hope you are up for the ride, human.” He’ll tell you with his smug smile “But nonetheless you should go on the front. It will be safer. That way, if your weak hands slip off the handlebar you will not pass through me.”

When cornering, you'll probably lose your balance and bump in his arms. But you'll realize he's not just using his arms to protect you. He's practically embrace you like the bodyguard he is protecting you from any danger that may come towards you. Despite his smug attitude, deep down he is taking his job of protecting you during the ride as serious as if he was protecting Malleus himself.

If he hears your laughs of fun during the ride, he will smile (since you can't see him), happy that you're having such fun with him. He'll not admit he was also having fun with you.

If you ask him if you two could jump the ravine like they did in the race, he’ll be surprised but say: “Ha Ha Ha! You sure have a dangerous amount of courage for your own good. Are you sure you can handle such thing, human?” you confirm “So get ready, because now I will not back down! And neither will I allowed you to!”

Don't be surprised if he ends up taking one of his hands off the handlebar to wrap it around your waist and make sure you don't come off the sled. The other arm exerting as much force to stay steady as when he trains with heavy weights.

After the ride, Squirshie will come up to you and stick out his chest as if proud of his work during the ride. It reminded you of Grim for a moment. When you bend down and pat him on the head, he recoils. To then approach again as if asking you to do that again.

YES! You choose him! Um... I mean, of course you choose him. after all, he is the most experienced at sledding. He he.

“I'm so happy you interested in sledding.” He'll tell you as you two approach his sleigh to prepare for the ride. “Despite the tension because of the race,I'm glad we still could show you how fun it is. I'm gonna give you the ride of your life!"

It will hurt his pride, but he will tell you to go behind him since you're taller. Your safety is way more important than his pride. “You must firmly grip the handlebar. But, um, you know, if you feel safer holding on to me, feel free to do so.”

If you choose to holding on to him, please don't mention the fact that his heart feels like is racing the Harveston Sledathon all over again.

When cornering, you'll probably lose your balance and and cling even tighter to him. This is the closest you've ever been to each other. Your chin is probably on his shoulder by now. “You’re okay?” he will ask whenever he feels you tighter your embrace. But don't think he isn't blushing every time this happens.

He'll ask if you want to jump the ravine. If you say no: “He he he. Don't worry. I was just kidding.”

If you say yes: “WHA-?! I was joking!” if you say you were joking as well, he will sigh with relief. If you say that now you want to do it. He'll need a minute to think about it. The last thing he wants is to put you in danger. But he understands you. In your position he would probably ask for the same thing. “Okay, if you really want to do this DO NOT let go of me! Don't even worry if you're hurting me. Hold on the tightest you can if you need, okay?”

Truth be told, he’s loving it! That shows how much you trust him to keep you safe even on a dangerous thing like that. And he won't let you doubt for a second that he won't be able to!

After the ride, his stuffed rabbit will start bouncing around you and wagging his little tail. And for some reason, I imagine if you pet him, he'll start tapping one of his hind legs on the ground. Like Thumper from Bambi. “Well that's new.” Epel will say, surprised.

If you would like to read more from me, you can find it in my pinned post: INDEX

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candycane969 · 1 year ago

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✨🎧🌆ROTTMNT DONATELLO HEADCANONS🌆🎧✨

made by me! candy! :3 no major spoilers

A quick guide!✨

💜 - Supported by canon (things that are pretty sure out there, maybe not confirmed 100% but yeah)

❤ - Kind of supported by canon (things that happened in the series that miiiight lead to some other stuff)

🧡 - My source is that I made it the fuck up (still trying to fit it into the character tho)

⭐ - Not sure if I'm taking this headcanon or not, but I do think It's pretty neat

💋 - Kinky! DISCLAIMER: Ive always seen the rottmnt boys (and April) in the age group from 17 to 19 and thats what I headcanon them as (as it is my own age group!). Ive seen the show and was fucking sure theyre my age and then a month or two later I was slapped in the face with thier actual age lol. I dont support any pedo shit, I also dont think minors can consent. Just putting it out there

Lets go!🌆💜🎧⭐✨

The 'Tism

• 💜 I think Its pretty fucking obvious that this boy is autistic, pretty much everything in the show supports this.

• ❤ Donny's headgear also works as noise cancelling headphones! He's often overwhelmed by background sounds and his gear makes it easier for him to live his life (either on missions or just spending time with his brothers and/or April). He still loves blasting his music on the highest volume tho. It's different when you consent to hearing your jams then when several people are talking at once and youre going crazy.

Tagging as kind of canon because he might have audio sensory issues because of his autism and you can reraly see him without the damn googles.

Different stims

❤ Foot stomping

❤ Hand flapping

🧡 Repeating a song/part of song over and over (yes, even if it has no words)

❤ Spinning on chairs

🧡 Pacing around the lab/the lair

• 💜 He knows ASL! Though It's never said in the show why he learned it, I believe that because he goes nonverbal often. Everyone in the lair can sign a bit because of that, but not everybody is too good at it. Donatello can communicate in ASL fluently.

Gender

• 🧡 Donatello never really felt connected to being "a men" and categorising things as "for boys" and "for girls" always seemed dumb to him. Shortly after Leo's coming out as a trans men (SURPRISE LEO HEADCANON) he went to talk to him about his gender experience. After some thinking and digging, Don came to the conclusion that he is in fact nonbinary. He still uses mostly male pronounces but always appreciates gender neutral pronounces coming his way.

Sexuality

• 🧡 While realising his own gender he also figured out that he doesn't really sees gender that seriously in others either. Men or women, its pretty much whatever to him. He doesn't like to label himself much when it comes to his sexuality, he accepts reffering to him as a pansexual or bisexual.

• 🧡 When it comes to dating Donatello doesn't imagine himself with anyone, really. He finds himself attractive, but doesn't think anyone would fancy him in a romantic way. He's not interessted much in dating either way. But he doesn't exclude dating someone in the future. It's just he won't go out of his way to look for love.

• ❤/🧡 Its obvious Don is a men of science, he's a genius when it comes to coding, math, engineering, I would say chemistry as well. Thats the field he feels the most comfortable in, but he loves learning new things in general. As long as there is interesting knowledge he can obtain, he will be there, soaking it like a sponge. He likes listening to info dumps, and probably listens to long ass video essays and/or podcasts.

• 🧡 Don likes to learn about others people hobbys and takes interest in learning about it. He likes showing others that he cares about something, even though Its something totally indifferent to him. For example, he knows lot about art making process from Mikey (Angelo even made him paint with him a couple of times!) even tho he doesn't really likes drawing and/or famous artists. No many people appreciate his work so he wants to show his appreciation to others.

• 💜 He is pretty low empathy most of the time. It's hard for him to relate to others, and can often feel like someone is overreacting. It's also challenging for him to put his feelings "out there". Which often makes him look unloving or unfriendly. And it couldn't be farther from the truth. He loves his brothers even though they bother him most of the time. And he loves April as well (though she never really troubled him much). He never really thinks that his low empathy is a flaw (more often he thinks about it as a blessing) but there rare are moment when he feels helpless because of it. He is glad that his family knows that he truly cares about them (and accepts any effort he puts in to express his feelings, even if it seems small).

• 🧡⭐ I've seen people headcanoning Donny as a baker and honestly I like it a lot. Cooking is Mikeys domain, and it suits him well, as it allows a lot of freestyling and just overall feeling. Baking and pastry making is very calculated and one miatake can ruin the whole thing. It reminds Don of engineering in a sense. Also baking is an easy way to get love and appreciation from his family because, cmon, he just made the most angelic fruit tarts in the whole universe, of course they're going to praise him. It also works as a stress relief. When feeling stumped and/or overwhelmed over a project or a situation he'll make something easy like brownies to get his mind of it.

• 🧡 He's very sentimental. He loves receiving gifts and will cherish and use them (even if he doesn't like it). He still has every "gamers dont die they respawn" Tshirt and every "dont fuck with my brother he was born in october and has autism" mug. Sometimes he REALLY wants to throw something away but god damn it this is painting Mikey did when he was ten and is just five splats of paint and thinking about him somehow finding out and crying about it might destroy him forever.

• 🧡⭐ This bitch reads fanfics, thats it. It started when he was around 13 or smth with Atomic Lass x Reader and now he knows all the fanfic lingo. He still might read something from time to time and writes very long and well written comments (with constructive criticism).

• 🧡 Speaking of which, Don writes perfect sentences while texting. All the correct spelling and punctuation. He also communicates with emojis and gifs like a millenial.

Food, TW: drinking!

• 🧡 He has a rather strong head, you cant make him drunk that easily. But when it finally happens, youre in for a ride. Shutting him up is near impossible, he will talk non-stop but with much less eloquence then while sober. Its extremely easy to make him laugh, so Leo absolutely loves it. He often looses track of what hes saying and starts completely different rant. Overall a chaotic mess. Really fun to witness it at least once. His beverage of choice is either fun cocktails or beer (tho rarely and/or only with some kind of juice because he doesn't like the fizziness on his tongue).

• 🧡 And that takes us to Donatello that hates fizzy drinks. He hates carbonated beverages, no matter if its cola or champagne. The feeling on his tongue and in his mouth makes him really uncomfortable. When there is no other choice but to drink up some bubbless, he leaves it open for as long as he can to get rid of them. His brothers despise him for that.

• 🧡 He doesn't like weird food combos either and is rather picky. When ordering food Don sticks to what he knows not to risk an uncomfortable texture touching his mouth. Texture is the most often reason for him not liking a specific food. Donnys pretty strict to preparing food as well (the way he does a thing is The Correct Way and no other exception is acceptable). Also he puts milk first so his cereal doesn't get soggy.

• 🧡 I feel like he likes fruit juices in boxes and fruit mousses but this is pretty random 🤷

• ❤/🧡 He wears contacts! We've seen little Donny with glassess, so I assumed he wears contacts now. When he knows he will be spending all day in the lair (for example because of an injury) he still has a pair of glassess he uses. And yes, he tapes them to the head. Because he rarely ever wears them, he never came up with a solution for not having ears and needing glassess.

• 🧡 ABSOLUTELY hates smoking. Will go on a rant if he sees someone he knows smoking. He absolutely despises the smell and WILL take it out of someones mouth/hand and throw it away. Appreciates the fun smells of vapes but still hates them. Will call vapers losers (maybe not exacly in these words but he will for sure).

• 🧡 Really good at makeup, but not as good as Leo is (ANOTHER SURPRISE LEO HEADCANON). He spend years perfecting his eyebrows of course. He also wears eyeliner because serving cunt is important even on the battlefield. From time to time you can see his nails painted as well.

• 🧡⭐ While being flustered or simply distracted he stutters a lot, mostly in a way of repeating whole words or parts of a sentence ("Its good because- Its good- Its good because I um- Its good-")

• 🧡 Enjoys taking very long baths, and actually prefers them much more then showers. Can stay underwater for a rather long time as well!! Being fully submerged calms him down a lot and its overall very relaxing for him.

• 🧡⭐ Ive seen a lot of takes that without his battle shell, he is really flexible (due to having a soft shell). And I like the idea. I think, that before sitting infront of a screen (or a desk in general) to do his work for several hours he stretches deeply so his back won't be so sore later. Also a reason to draw Donny in yoga poses and thats always cool.

• ❤ Makes up shit to fuck with his brothers. Like just spreading misinformation and gaslighting them for shit and giggles. Or to get them to leave him alone for a while. Also will gaslight them if they somehow find out that he was lying ("what? you must have heard me wrong then 🙄💅")

• 💜/❤ Loves singing and dancing!!! Aint the best singer (tho I love his songs in the show Im kissing him as we speak) but is a gorgeous dancer! He finds it incredibly fun and feels fabulous while doing it. Also Im pretty sure dancing counts as stimming so add it to the list. Dances solo like 90% of the time but really enjoys dancing in pairs (dances with April a whole lot when they get the chance!).

• ❤ He rarely laughs out loud, but when he does it is loud and messy. A good joke can make him think about it all day and continue laughing for a long time. Not my og take, Ive seen this headcanon before and I love it so so much :3

• 🧡 From all his brothers, he kind of wishes to be human the most of them all. Its not a big big wish, he does think of himself as very unique individual and takes pride of being a mutant. But sometimes while hanging out with April he can get lost in his thoughts of "what ifs". Maybe in the process of making a cloaking accessory.

• 🧡 His handwriting is god-awful. All scribly and fucked up like Doctors writing. Unfamiliar eye would not decipher a word out of it, but Don knows exactly what everything means. But he mostly writes digitally.

• ❤ Dons dislike of hugging is canon, but I do believe he likes being touched on his head and face (head pats, cheek rubs, scratches). He enjoys hand holding when it's appropriate as well.

• 💋 Im headcanoning the boys to go through mating season once a year (except mikey cuz he small) everyone at a different time. It would be similiar to an ovulation but much more horny (with also fever symptoms). Don would be the second after Raph to get it. While in heat he doesn't go feral or anything, but after a few days stops working because he cant focus on his craft. Waves of sudden temperature changes (mostly high heat) with really horny thoughts and hypersensitivity to pretty much everything...yeah not the best work environment. He spends his most intensive days closed off in his lab or room because he really doesn't want his family to see him like this (the rest of the turtles are in thier rooms during thier mating time as well for the same reason). Also add being possessive while having a SO, and also veeery easy to irritate.

• 💋 Donny takes on a more submissive role while being intimate, even though he loves to be in charge all the time. But he isn't a bottom either, I would put him perfectly in the middle as a switch (more leaning on that sub part tho).

• 💋 His biggest turn on is smell. Like someones natural smell, no perfumes and all. He likes to snuggle in the crook of the neck and take it all in. This becomes cranked up to eleven during mating season, as he absolutely cannot stop sniffing. Would love his significant other to leave him clothes with thier smell on it and sleep and/or snuggle with it.

Might add more later but thats all for now :3💜

Hope you enjoyed it⭐✨

#If you think Ive misrepresented him or something is clashing with canon let me know #going to make Leo headcanons soon cuz I have a lot I love him #rise of the tmnt #rottmnt #rottmnt donnie #tmnt #donatello #text #rise donnie #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #donatello headcanons #headcanons #donnie headcanons #rottmnt headcanons #tmnt 2018 #rottmnt donatello #writing #rise donatello #rise headcanons

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kirchefuchs · 2 years ago

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so yk how in ur AU, The Narrator is an AI turned human? And Stanley is aware that The Narrator is an AI? And how Jim and TK are/were part of the development team?

Do you also remember the Lovebug Virus?

ehe

Now, I have an idea for a tiny lil oneshot (probably gonna have more than 2k words so yay!! depends on what my writer's block says tho) based off of your AU with the Lovebug Virus added to the mix

SOO IF U DON'T MIND

Could you describe how TK and Jim (and literally everybody in ur AU) are? Personality-wise, I mean. I wanna write them as in-character as I can so ye :D

please and thank youuuu!!

— 🅰️non || 05/17/2023

*cracks knuckles* Okay, here we go!

Narrator (Pollux): For the most part he's the same as how he is in the game, just a little softer. He's definitely grown very attached to Stanley over time and especially after they enter a relationship he practically melts to Stanley's touch. He's still got that iconic snark and sass, he's just softer around the edges now.

Stanley: He's a menace. He's lovely, kind, and loves to shower others with affection, but he's a scheming, mischievous little piece of trash (affectionate). He loves to cause problems. Small problems. Ones that don't really hurt anyone and can be laughed about later. He just loves to smile and have fun. He's selectively mute and primarily communicates with BSL, but when he does speak it's usually in whispers or very quietly spoken.

Timekeeper (TK): Before the Parable? They were pretty laid back but took any challenges that came their way with a fierce determination. They were very good at their job. That being coding. They are a little socially awkward so Jim would do most of the talking for the two of them. They grew to miss talking to people after they got trapped on the coding void of the Parable. After spending what felt like an eternity in near complete isolation they went a wee bit crazy, so some things they say don't make sense or their thoughts get jumbled together. They come off as very cryptic sounding. Poor guy.

Jim: He is very loud. He loves to talk (probably has adhd but has gone undiagnosed) and he adores trying out new things with his projects. He was the head of the development team so he's definitely got some people skills, and he's similar to Stanley where he likes to make harmless jokes. He's a little bit mischievous, a lot a bit funny, and he loves to make people smile. He's got one of those laughs that can very quickly turn into snorting if he's laughing hard enough. (Lowkey sounds like Ernie's laugh on sesame street)

Mariella: Imagine if Stanley were a raging lesbian. That's pretty close to what Mariella is like. Although she's a lot better at putting on a professional persona when she needs to. And she's more the type to tell really bad puns than to purposefully annoy someone like Stanley would. Because of how similar the two are, Stanley and Mariella do get along well and consider each other friends (though she tends to tease him about how long it took for him and Narry to get together).

Curator: Curie is significantly more calm and collected than Narry. She can sometimes come off as a little intimidating or strict, but she just says things as they are. She's very self aware and that helped to her and Mariella figuring out their relationship quite a bit faster than the boys (what can I say? She doesn't see the point in bottling up emotions). She often acts like a wise older sister to Narry, giving him little suggestions and encouragements when he needs them. She cares a lot about those close to her, it's just hard to see sometimes.

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twiggyrogue · 7 months ago

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Crazy Ex Girlfriend reading that no one has asked for but I've been thinking about it! but it's about whats up with the songs that Rebecca isn't present for (and some solos that she is but that just makes it confusing)! Because there's a lot of different interpretations of it, and I want to just put out mine

For me, the songs that Rebecca isn't there for aren't in her head, they are in the singers' minds. In the world of the show, especially with songs like "Hey West Covina," "Thought Bubbles," "I Go to the Zoo," (and plenty more), Rebecca absolutely doesn't know the inner thoughts being shared in those numbers. We know she is still projecting onto them from other songs from around those times- "Settle for Me", "Ping Pong Girl", "Strip Away My Conscious" (the first two are putting words in other character's mouths, the third spells out her impression of him pretty clear.) Rebecca doesn't know their struggles, that's why they are singing them to us, the viewers!

They're singing because it's the language that the show, "Crazy Ex Girlfriend" uses to share large emotions and inner thoughts. Yes, it's also the diegetic way Rebecca sees the world, but since her POV is the primary view the show, that's how the viewpoint remains. Despite this, even though Becks is the main character, CXG still goes out of its way to develop and explore character when they are outside of her, to show that none of them are exactly perfect narrators.

I think saying that Rebecca is the one choreographing their personal vignettes- retroactively, after she learns about them- weakens them and puts too many filters over the ideas in the songs. Because then it makes every song actually about what she thinks someone's breakthrough is about. Lets be real, she never had and will never have enough thoughts about George to formulate "George's Turn."

If this was a much more experimental show- which, it already is, but even moreso than normal- everyone would have their own interpretations of their psyche, like Nathaniel's romcom episode. Like, say for "Trapped in a Car" maybe Rebecca is singing in her head, but Paula is imagining a really shitty filler part in a romance novel where the side character she does not care about has way too many lines. They'd be saying the same thing in different mediums, but in the show, they just converge into one song.

CXG is musical comedy, written by comedic musicians and sold with the idea that each episode has a song. And as a medium, musicals are fundamentally fantastic at doing this introspective character work! The changing of genres for certain characters is already an insight on how to read them, which makes it a joy to analyze. It's a format that really, really works for a show that wants viewers to empathize with everybody in the cast. The show needs to use "Rebecca's worldview" on other characters because that's the kind of show it is!

imo it's such a neat move that the writers decided to explore how the introspective and emotional medium of musicals could work as a coping mechanism and I love it! But, if anything, making the main character literally have vivid mental music numbers does confuse the use of them in any other place when they're played more narratively straight lol

#thank you and now i retire from my brainworms abt this show #cxg #crazy ex girlfriend #there's also songs that are diegetic in the world or ones i headcanon as being diegetic which confuses everything more lmao #team “uti was actually just greg singing irl”#ok now im (probably) done ty and sorry to my like 2 followers for this #back to my regularly scheduled magnus posting thursday or whenever i catch up

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bullet-prooflove · 2 years ago

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Donna’s Wednesday Radio Show Prompt List #16

It's that time again! The Wednesday Radio prompt list!

There are some really good ones on there this week!

Please check the updated character list on my pinned post to see who I am writing for before submitting a prompt!

Also do not forget to put the entire prompt into your ask!

I know the sound, of your heart

Your lipstick stain is a work of art

On the doorstep like we've never been apart

I'm in the phone booth, it's the one across the hall

We don't communicate Can you not say what's on your mind

It's not about reciprocation

I got your name tattooed in an arrow heart

Is it all in my head Or was it something I said?

I know he's there, but I just had to call

I said, are you gonna be my girl?

I've got your ripped skinny jeans lying on the floor

It's good to hear your voice, you know it's been so long

You ignite all the colors inside my heart

But if you close your eyes Does it almost feel like nothing changed at all?

a shiny diamond ring with your name on it

I been up against the wall so long, And the bonds that hold me here are strong, Yeah it hurts

Talk to me Can't you see? I'm on your side

I'd like to talk when I can show you my affection Oh, I can't control myself

Would you wanna run away too? 'Cause all I really want is you

I still remember the day we met, I was hanging on your every word, I didn't think I would ever let, Somebody see into my world

Because I'm trying to forgive And now I'm trying to forget

I see it everyday You hide the truth behind your eyes

So you're with her, and not with me,

You look so perfect standing there In my American Apparel underwear

Say what it is you're trying to say But if you lie to me again I'll be the one that walks away

Oh if you lost your way And it drove you crazy, You would still have me, We work together you'll see, Blood sweat and tears

I can't believe I forgot your name

I was just a tumble went a little too far

I made a mix-tape straight out of '94

But it's enough to make a grown man cry

Everybody told me you were leaving Funny I should be the last to know

But baby in my head I'm nailing you instead

Oh with an aching feeling inside Cutting me up, deeper and deeper Fills me with a sadness that I can't hide

I could see the danger made it more intriguing

When she lays in your warm arms, Don't think of me

She's so sweet With her get back stare

My tell-tale heart's a hammer in my chest

And there's so much skin to see

Looking back over my shoulder I can see that look in your eye

I was bound for trouble when I let myself go

And if you close your eyes Does it almost feel like you've been here before?

I wish that we were starting over

I never dreamed it could be over I never wanted to say goodbye

Hope you know that I'm happy to see you

I know sometimes it will hurt And you wanna hate me

Oh baby won't you come again?

You're so conceited

With an aching deep in my heart

And I'm on the rooftop with curious strangers

You think that you're my shadow But you're glittering like gold

On my mind I can't wait anymore

Could it be that we belong together

I heard he spent last night with her

Every day it's a losing battle

Well I could see You home with me, But you were with another man

And I'm sipping bourbon The future's uncertain

It takes two imperfect people To dance a sweet ballet

We got no games to play So we got no rules

Hallucinations only mean that your brain is on fire

Does it bother you now when I'm not there

Torture - my hads are tied it's, Torture - I'll survive but, It hurts so bad

What does it matter if I lie to you?

Don't think you're perfect either But I love you anyway

The world doesn't matter no when I'm with you

I said that I love you

And when I take my mask off It's you I want to hold

I don't regret it but I'm glad that we're through

Them girls put on a show But they will never know What makes you beautiful I watch them come and go

We'll bicker and battle and drown in our own sorrow

And we left things to protect my mental health

Can't hear what I'm dancing to Just wanna be with you

What kind of fool would keep hangin' around While you treat me this way

But you call me when you're bored

I'll hold you up when you fall down Even if you say I'm rude

Them boys got all the talk But they don't know a lot, You know my every thought That's why I make them walk

you're playing with yourself

chest tight, and I'm ready to go

And the walls kept tumbling down In the city that we love

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hunter-sylvester · 1 year ago

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Fic Writing Questions Tag

Thank you so much to @if-not-now-tell-me-when for tagging me 🤘

1. How many fics do you have on AO3? If we're excluding notfic/character analysis: 7 (otherwise 13)

2. What’s your total AO3 word count? 49,925 (52,689 if we're including notfic/character analysis)

3. What fandoms do you write for? -Metal Lords (primarily) -Stranger Things

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos? (1) Infinitesimally small and unforgivably burdensome (Metal Lords) T (2) Does it get better? (Metal Lords/Stranger Things) M (3) Metal Things (Metal Lords/Stranger Things) M (4) Freak Doesn't Cut It (Stranger Things) M (5) Left Behind (Metal Lords) T

5. Do you respond to comments? I try to! I'm just really fucking bad at responding to compliments/kind words. I just freeze up & don't know what to say a lot of the time so it can take a lot of energy to write out a very mid response to a lovely comment 😔 but I do try.

6. What’s the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? Err...that's between Left Behind and Candy Apples & Razor Blades. The former is a ficlet/minific and it's just sorta sad. The latter has an angstier ending depending on how you interpret it, it's a little ambiguous in my mind but I don't think everybody even reads it as ambiguous so idk ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ (unless we're counting the unpublished alternate ending I have written for Freak Doesn't Cut It because THEN IT'S THAT- but I'd only maybe publish that after the actual ending & I'm really fucking stuck with that fic so that's ages away if it ever gets posted)

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? Probably Infinitesimally small and unforgivably burdensome. It's just pretty light overall. Altho I want to at least mention that I think Does it get better? ultimately ending on hope and healing is also a very happy ending in my book 🖤

8. Do you get hate on fics? Haven't so far, but maybe someday lol (hopefully not soon tho)

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind? No, not really. Vaguely heated make-out is as far as I tend to go.

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written? I do, I've only really written Metal Lords/Stranger Things so I guess the "craziest" one would be Metal Things purely because of the crossover pairing nobody asked for (Hunter Sylvester x Steve Harrington.) But none of it's very crazy.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? Not that I'm aware of and I kinda doubt anyone would want to lol (If someone ever did it's on sight tho 🔪)

12. Have you ever cowritten a fic before? No, and I honestly don't think that would work for me.

13. What’s your all time favourite ship? I'm not 100% sure, it's either Steddie or Spuffy. (I don't think I would ever write about the latter tho)

14. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? I'm far too stubborn to accept defeat like that. I have a lot of WIPs that feel like behemoths to me but I'm going to finish them.

15. What are your writing strengths? UHM...I'm really not good at being positive about myself but I guesss I think in my opinion I'm decent at capturing the character's voices????????? maybe

16. What are your writing weaknesses? I think I sometimes over-assume that people will understand my intention behind a scene. Also if there's too many characters I can't keep track of them anymore. And the fact that I dropped out of school at 14/15 occasionally becomes an issue. Having learned English almost entirely on feeling/by osmosis and thus not always knowing the actual rules. Of...yaknow...grammar.

17. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic? I'd shy away from it if I didn't speak the language fluently and I can't think of a reason I would ever want to involve my native language in a fic. Besides that I only speak English so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

18. First fandom you wrote for? Publicly it's Metal Lords/Stranger Things. Privately it's actually the infamous [REDACTED]

19. Favourite fic you’ve written? It HAS to be Does it get better? DIGB was my baby for the better part of this past year and it contains a lot of my favorite headcanons about the featured characters. Some examples: - FtM Hunter Sylvester - Eddie Munson gives the BEST hugs - Hunter is a walking ball of anxiety (altho that is practically canon)

As well as a lot of moments/scenes that I hold very very dear. Some examples: - Kev & Hunter laying on Hunter's bed and just talking in ch5 - Eddie helping Drunk!Hunter take his jewelry & shoes off and just talking to him in ch8 (altho I could just list ch8 as a whole tbh) - The entirety of ch3 basically lmao

There's stuff I can and do criticize about DIGB in retrospect but ultimately it's still very precious to me.

No pressure tag: @itsfreakingbats, @anything-thats-rock-and-roll, @ghostcaterwaul, @allmoshnobrain, @nemobeatrice + anyone who wants to. Just do it. Be free.

#my post #tagged #writeblr

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catzula · 4 years ago

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Don’t be late.

Warnings: Cursing, 4.5 k words, fluff in general, Bakugou being a dumbass, reader is always late.

a/n: I genuinely had fun writing this fic and I hope you guys have fun reading it!

Synopsis: you're a student at the support section and since Bakugou literally drove everyone else insane, you were the last person that would help him with his costume. Little did he know that you had a crush on this sparky sparky boom man.

Everybody in the support section just hated that one guy. That guy named Bakugou who would practically harass people until he got what he wanted. Well, okay, almost everyone who knew Bakugou hated him but people in the support section hated him in a whole new level.

He was a nightmare. Nobody could even stand him.

Well, nobody except for you. You thought of him as intriguing, as well as a pain in the ass. But even him being a pain in the ass could be justified in your eyes, you knew he was doing all this simply because he was a perfectionist. Of course he could tone it down a bit, but... That would.be very out of character, wouldn't it?

He thought of himself as the best and it shouldn't be a surprise, for him to want to have a hero costume that was also perfect. You could understand that, but it still didn't change the fact that he was the worst kind of customer anyone would ever have to work with.

He had never worked with you though, he was in class 1/A for gods sake, of course he didn't work with you... Well, that until he ran out of people that would help him willingly.

"You know what? I'm done. Go fuck yourself." Were the words that echoed in the room, suppressing even those deafening machine sounds. Your friend threw Bakugou's costume in his face harshly, still cursing under his breath.

"Tch, whatever! You're just some extra that can't even do what I asked for." You watched Bakugou as his upper lip curled threateningly, reminding you of a wolf, and boy did he look pissed. Like, really pissed. His crimson eyes glaring at the guy in front of him, who was packing his supplies and trying to get away from this angry dude as soon as possible.

"That's the thing, Bakugou! What you want doesn't exist! I don't have these miraculous powers that when I snap my fingers your costume just turns into something else. You have to give me details of what you're asking and you have to ask something that makes sense! Not just some dumb idea that popped into your mind!" Everybody knew that was a lie. Bakugou always had the most amazing ideas, so creative and so... Logical. It's just that they were too... Much. To much to execute, they were brilliant but not doable.

"First of all, it does make sense, it's you who can't understand! Second of-"

"Whatever, Bakugou. I'm done with this shit. Go find someone else to help you with your costume."

"Who the fuck are you to not let me fucking talk? I will fucking kill you-"

"That's enough Bakugou." A monotone voice that came from the door made Bakugou freeze. You knew this black haired guy, he was the Eraserhead! You saw him around the campus but never from up this close!

Bakugou looked at his teacher, never losing that wolfish expression on his face, and he exited the room without saying anything, which was a first for everyone in this room. Eraserhead also exited, looking like he was about to go in a coma.

The room was still silent, until it wasn't.

"Oh my God, what a fucking jerk."

"I can't even believe how you managed to put up with him that long."

"He's not even that good."

Lie. That was a big fat lie because Bakugou may not be a lot of things but he was that good. Still, you chose to stay silent, your eyes still glued to the door he just exited from.

He amazed you, really. You noticed him the first time he came to the support section, his aura screaming confidence. He started to come there frequently, making everyone else go crazy, but you just kept noticing small details about him every time he came there. He was an asshole, no one could deny that, but he was also amazing.

It was amazing how determined he was, even though it was a pain, his perfectionism also left you in awe, how smart he was, how confident he was, how strong he was...

You realized your big crush on him the day you saw him on that sport festival. The other people thought it was so unheroic of him to go that hard on Uraraka, which was so stupid. Didn't she also want to be a hero? Wasn't she going to the same school as him, going through the same trainings? It was only normal for him to beat her, because if he didn't, she would have beaten him. Would people tell her it was so rude of her to go that hard on him too? No, you thought he was astonishing to act the way he did.

Him being so proud, not accepting the first rank made your heart beat faster. He was just so strong, so proud, so vulnerable it made you want to hug him tightly and tell him that he was your hero.

Not that you would ever have the chance though, or so you thought.

He came back not even after a few days, making everyone groan in frustration. He went straight to the table that displayed the recent projects that were done. The table existed to give an idea of what anyone could do so they could choose along shit what they had in mind. So that meant, who's item he chose would have to work with him. All of you eyed him, waiting to see who was the very unlucky person.

He picked one invention of the table, looking somewhat intrigued, and looked around the room trying to guess who it belonged to. When he couldn't guess he went to the nearest person and shoved the invention in their face. "Who does this belong to?!"

The person he was holding eyed the object he was holding suspiciously, relief written on his face when he saw it didn't belong to him. "I think that's Y/N's."

You could hear the sighs of relief around the room. So did he, but he didn't seem to care. Instead he walked towards you, he was so close you could smell-

Why on earth did he smell like... Caramel?!

"Is this yours?" You felt the tingling sensation of excitement all over your body, giving you goosebumps. "It is." You answered, which made him narrow his eyes, looking at you suspiciously.

"Is it really yours? You did this?" Now that was straight up rude. "Yes, it's really mine, asshole. What kind of a question even is that?!"

He shrugged shit a smug grin on his face. His eyes wandered over you, looking at your (e/c) eyes, your face, your figure, and his grin grew wider.

"I haven't seen you around here before." Ah, the angry boy was back. His upper lip curled ever so slightly, looking at you like you were some lowly human. "Oh yeah? Well I have seen you quite a lot here. You know, while you were making everyone else go crazy."

Your answer turned his face red with anger but -a miracle- he was holding back! You could see it was really hard for him not to scream insults in your face but he was aware that you were his last chance. Oh didn't that just boost your ego. Now it was your turn to look at him with a smug grin on your face.

"Whatever." He mumbled pulling you to the nearest table. "What are you-" Before he even let you finish he shushed you and lay down the papers he was holding on the table. You looked at what's on the paper, it was a costume drawing, a really detailed one at that. As you got closer to the paper, inspecting it, he was watching your every move with narrowed eyes.

After you memorised everything on the paper you bir your lip, trying to hide your admiration. "Did you draw this? Are these all... Your ideas?"

The drawing wasn't amazing but it was neat, everything was calculated to the very core, the ideas were so clear on the paper, making you feel like you only had to follow these instructions and do nothing else. "Yes, of course I drew them! Everything you see there is mine." He said angrily but you could see he wasn't actually angry, just proud.

"Well, they're pretty good, if I'm going to be honest." You said trying to hide your excitement. You traced the drawing with your finger.

"I know they are. But can you do it?" His smug grin was back and you couldn't help but roll your eyes at him. Could you do it?

You smiled sweetly and surely enough he smiled back, already knowing your answer.

"Nope."

His smile dropped, leaving it's place to a furious look in his eyes. "You dumbass, then why the fuck are you wasting my fucking time?!" He screamed, people around you shot you a knowing look. He pulled the paper of the table harshly, about to leave when you held his wrist and made him stop.

"Can you stop for a fucking minute and listen?" His eyes widened when he heard you cursing, a big contrast to your sweet tone and face. "I can't do this, but neither can anyone else."

"What the fuck does that mean?" He screamed making you winch. "Can you just- shut up for a second? This is not possible, get that in your bigass head. But-" you stopped thinking for a second. You shuffled around the drawers in search of a pen. "But, I can do this instead. This would be much more possible, and it would give you what you were aiming for. Of course it wouldn't be the same but the end product will be helpful."

You said quickly sketching your idea on the paper, as quick as possible before you forget what you were thinking about.

When he saw what you drew his burrows furrowed and for a second you thought he was mad at you but instead he huffed. "Tch, not bad I guess." He said, but internally he was so impressed that you actually came up with this alternative in a few seconds of so.

"Wait, does that mean you'll work with me?" You said eyes open wide. Well the question was more as, would you work with him, but he didn't say that. "If you can do it, I will."

"That's amazing, now I finally have a worthy client!" You said excitedly and on of his burrows went up, sending you an questioning look. "Worthy of... You?"

You shot him a killing glare but stayed quiet. "Let's work on this idea a little more, what do you say?"

He shrugged. "It's too noisy in here. Lets go to the library." He said ready to pull you out of the room but you shot a glance at your phone, pouting. "Can't, I gotta finish this side project today. Meet me at the library tomorrow? How is 4pm?"

He wasn't really happy since you couldn't work on it immediately but he had to be a little nice to you, not just because you were the last person that would actually help him, but your idea was also pretty good. "Tch, whatever. Don't be late."

You smiled sweetly, making his heart beat a little faster. Why did his heart beat this fast? Was this your quirk or something?

"Bye Bakugou." You waved as you started to sketch something on a sheet of paper.

***

Bakugou was sitting in the library, shooting angry glances at the clock. When he saw you coming towards him with a big smile on your face, your hands full of papers, books and stuff, he felt his heart jump. This had to be your quirk.

"Hey! So I worked on this idea we talked about yesterday and-" Before you even sat next to him you started to talk without even stopping to breath. "You're late." He murmured with and angry look in his eyes, you looked at your watch and smiled apologetically. "Oops, sorry, I was with Shinsou about- well that's not important is it? It's 5 minutes anyway."

Bakugou had always been an angry individual but today he could practically feel his explosions itching for him to release them. You saw the look in his eyes and laughed, "Hey, chill out. I'm sorry, alright? I'll make it up to you with a coffee, how does that sound?"

Bakugou didn't even like coffee but he couldn't refuse this offer either. "If you get there in time."

You laughed once again, a sweet sound that made Bakugou feel proud, even though he didn't even know why he was proud. "Yes, yes, I'll be there on time. But let's discuss this now." You lay the papers down, showing a few new sketches.

You both worked on it for a long time, even though it felt like a few minutes at most. You sometimes felt his gaze on you, instead of the paper in front of you, which made your cheeks flush red.

"So um-" you said, not really sure what to even say. "This was nice."

He had never heard anyone from the support section say that working with him was nice, but he still took the compliment. "Meet me at the coffee place tomorrow? Since it's weekend we can meet a little earlier too."

His eyes narrowed as he looked at you. It was weird having someone who actually wanted to work with him and it felt odd. A good type of odd, if he had to confess.

"Don't be late." He said.

You laughed. "I won't."

***

You were late.

Bakugou was about to go crazy waiting at the coffee shop. He felt so stupid for waiting for you but felt even worse for not being able to leave. His mind kept making you excuses, every time the door opened he felt his heart jump and that made him so angry at himself.

He was about to leave when the door opened once again, this time it was actually you entering. His eyes widened when he saw you, you looked incredibly pretty without any dust smeared on your face, your (h/c) hair in a cute style that enhanced your beautiful face and was that... Make up? He wasn't sure, hell, he never even realized any of these things before. But he couldn't take his eyes off of you and felt his anger die inside him.

You saw him and your eyes shined in a way that made him want to smile too, a cute smile was on your face when you came to his table.

"You're late!"

"That can't be I'm actually-" you checked the time and pouted. "Oh, I'm late."

His eyebrows furrowed, so he wasn't even important enough for you to actually show up on time? He was about to say something mean but held his tongue when you giggled. "I actually left the dorm an hour early to be here before you..." You shrugged. "Apparently I'm incapable of actually arriving anywhere at the time we agreed on. I hear this all the time, I just can't get anywhere on time!"

He felt a little better knowing it wasn't only him, but still. He was Bakugou Katsuki for Gods sake! He wasn't just someone, he was the future number one hero. Still, he couldn't help but feel good knowing you intended to be here early.

"Whatever." He said not looking at you. "No, I'm actually sorry!" You said biting your lip.

"It's whatever. Let's just get some coffee and get this shit done with." You felt a sharp pain in your chest, he wasn't wrong, but it felt bad hearing that from your crush. You should have known he wasn't actually interested in you, he wouldn't have chosen you if you weren't his last chance.

You still didn't let that spoil your mood, at the very end you were here, drinking coffee with him, weren't you?

"Well, what would you like to drink?" You asked, taking your wallet out of your handbag. His eyes shined with anger when he saw what you were doing.

"Like hell I'll let you pay for it!" He said, stopping you.

"But this is for making you wait yesterday!" Feeling his hand holding you made your heart jump. "And well... Today too." You added.

"I don't care, I said I won't let you pay, and I won't."

"But-"

"Stop arguing for fucks sake!" You closed your mouth at that. "O-okay. Well I'll have (your favorite beverage)." You saw him smile at your answer and stood up.

You were trying to calm yourself while he was buying you coffee, didn't even realize someone was calling your name. "Y/N!"

A hand touched your shoulder, making you jump in surprise. It was a certain indigo haired boy who looked very much sleep deprived. "Oh, Shinsou!" You smiled sweetly. You have helped him a lot before, which ended with you guys being close friends.

"What are you doing here?" You asked, even though it was a stupid question, he was addicted to coffee. "Well, duh." He said, shaking the carton of coffee on his hand. You smiled at that. "But what are you doing here?" He looked around to see anyone familiar that you could be waiting for. He saw Bakugou ordering coffee, but it was such an impossible thing for both of you to be together so he didn't even think about it.

"Well I uh..." You didn't even have time to answer when an angry boy came close to your table. "What the fuck are you doing here?!"

Shinsou's eyes widened ever so slightly looking at the angry boy, and then back at you. "You're here with him?"

"You got a problem with that?" Bakugou asked, taking his seat right across you.

"Well, we're working on his costume." You said sensing the tension.

Bakugou scoffed, apparently not happy with your answer. "Well, okay. I'll see you around?" Said Shinsou, you could understand why he was walking away, since his motto was stay out of drama. "Yeah, sure!" You smiled sweetly, feeling a little bad because you felt like you were dusting him away.

"Are we gonna start working or not?!" You flinched when you heard him scream, a sinking feeling reminding you once again, he wanted nothing to do with you other than working on his costume.

"Sorry." You mumbled. "So I um, worked on this a little more after you left and I think it would be much better if we changed this to this. Because otherwise it would be too heavy."

Bakugou scoffed. "Hah, I can handle heavy." You glanced at him, surprised by his unnecessary narcissism. "Yeah, I know. But still, wouldn't it be better if it were lighter?" He stayed still for a while then shrugged.

"Tch, whatever." Oh, you were starting to see a pattern here. Maybe it wasn't just unnecessary narcissism, but more like... Trying to impress you?

"Are you training today too?" You asked, just testing the waters. "Of course I am! If I'm going to be the number 1 hero, I gotta train every fucking day."

You tapped your chin with your finger. "That's true. Although I've seen you train before and it looked pretty intense." And that was true. He was training so hard it made you shudder just thinking about it.

"Oh, you were watching me?" Oh, shit. You tried to ignore the heat rushing to your cheeks. "Well I wasn't watching you specifically, but it was so... Extra so I may have looked your way once or twice." You tried to cover. But the smug grin on his face told you he didn't believe it a bit.

"Yeah, sure. Whatever you say."

"So, what do you think? Should I change this part? Oh and I thought it would be better if we did this too-" You stopped talking when you felt his eyes lingering on you, instead of the paper. "Bakugou?" You said smiling. "Why are you staring at me?"

"I'm not staring at you!" He shouted, your smile dropping almost instantly. "Why the fuck would I even stare at you?!" His hands were tight fists on the table, his red eyes reminding you of flames. Your eyes widened at his response and you forced a laugh.

"Well, ouch." You said with the same forceful laugh. "I- I wasn't implying anything, you know..." You mumbled.

"I- I..." This was the first time you have seen Bakugou in a loss of words. You shrugged. "Yeah, I know, you want to get this over with as soon as possible."

That was far from what he wanted to say but he accepted it nonetheless.

You both worked on it for hours, once again the time passed quickly, felt like it was a blink of an eye. "That was intense." You said while stretching a bit.

"Well, that was it. We finished the whole design and idea process and I'll take it from here."

His brows furrowed. "What do you mean by I'll take it from here?"

You shrugged. "I just have to actually do this now, so we don't really have to meet like this." Why did Bakugou feel that sting in his chest? For Gods sake, what the fuck was your quirk?

"Y/N." He said that made you stop stretching. Hearing your name from him made your heart beat faster. "What the hell is your quirk?"

"My quirk?" You asked, a little surprised at the sudden question.

"Yes!"

"Well it's not a big quirk. I can manipulate shadows." You shrugged. Your quirk had never came off as handy but it was fun to change the shapes of people's shadows and seeing their reactions.

Bakugou desperately tried to find a relation with your quirk and this weird sensation he felt every time you smiled but he couldn't find any.

"That's a dumb quirk." He said instead. You giggled, surprising him. "It is, but I don't really need a quirk to be special, I can work without it just fine."

His brow quirked up at your response. "If you say so."

***

Everyday for the next week, Bakugou had visited you in your workspace. "I want to see if you're doing a good fucking job." He said when you asked him why.

He stayed with you as long as he could, telling you about his day, about those damn extras in his class, with the exception of "Deku." He was talking about Deku like he wasn't even a part of the class. You knew he was talking about Izuku Midoriya, that green haired shy guy who broke a limb every time he used his quirk. Oh, Bakugou talked about him a lot, with great hatred too.

But even though he was just rambling, you loved to listen to him. And even though he never even implied it, you knew he liked watching you work too. It was probably because he was interested in how his costume was coming up but you still enjoyed it very much.

But the truth was that he had almost completely forgotten about his costume. He was coming to see you every day, every chance because you... You just understood him. But Bakugou was so foreign to these feelings, it made him feel scared and vulnerable.

You weren't aware of any of this, of the internal crisis he was having, so you were surprised when he suddenly stopped showing up.

You couldn't really work too, since your eyes were practically glued to the door, waiting to see a glimpse of the spiky blonde hair, but you never did.

The day you were done with the costume, you texted him. You tried to look as good as you could, cleaned the dust off of your face and your uniform, wore your best perfume only to see someone else who came instead of him to pick the costume up.

It was Kirishima, you had chatted with him before, he was a pretty cute guy, and you knew from your daily chats from Bakugou he liked him too. So just seeing him reminded you of Bakugou which made your mood even worse.

"Is... Is Bakugou okay?" You asked.

You saw the uncomfortable look on his face and you knew Bakugou was avoiding you. "He- he- he is okay... He's just-" You sighed but smiled nonetheless. "It's okay, I understand." His eyes widened. "You do?!"

You shrugged. "He's done with me, I see that. I had the same treatment from some other students too, although it's not very nice, is it? Still, say hi to him for me please."

"It's- it's not like that, he's just-" Kirishima looked a little embarrassed but mostly panicked and you couldn't help but giggle. "It's okay, I'm just happy I could help him."

When Kirishima went back to the dorms, only to find Bakugou on the couch looking at his phone, he was pissed.

"Dude you must be the dumbest person alive."

"Who the fuck are you calling dumb, shitty hair?!" Bakugou jumped from the couch, about to end Kirishima once and for all but Kirishima wasn't having it. "You! I'm calling you dumb! I took your costume from YN, the girl you have been avoiding like the plague, and I was embarrassed for you!"

Kirishima saw Bakugou stiffening as he mentioned your name and smiled knowingly. "Bakugou, if you don't go there and talk to her I will kick your ass."

"You can't kick my ass, idiot." Bakugou answered gruffly.

"Oh but I can. Go fucking talk to her dude! She asked about you, you know? What you're doing is so fucking unmanly." Kirishima gave Bakugou the costume he was holding and Bakugou could swear he could smell your scent on it.

"You call me unmanly one more fucking time and you won't have a tongue to call anyone unmanly. I am the definition of manly."

"Not with that attitude you're not."

"Who the fuck are you, my mother or something?" But Bakugou knew Kirishima was telling the truth, and he just couldn't get rid of this stupid feeling in his chest. Yet, he had thought that if he just stopped seeing you, he would never feel this way ever again. He was wrong. Oh, he had thought of you almost every second of the day, his heart feeling heavier with every second he didn't see you and it was more than he could bear.

He knew what he had to do, he just didn't have the courage before.

"I think- I have to go." He said practically running to the door. He passed the now entering Kaminari with such force and speed, Kaminari almost lost his balance. "Woah, where the fuck is he going?" He asked looking at the grinning Kirishima.

"You'll see." Was his answer.

***

You were about to leave the workshop, later than usual but you didn't really mind working a little longer, anything that would take your kind off of him, you accepted gratefully.

All of that until you heard his voice.

"YN!"

You jumped not expecting this at all. Your eyes widened when you saw the face you had longed to see for almost a week, and there he was, cheeks flushed like he had ran all the way here.

And you knew why he was here. You weren't stupid, the look in his eyes just gave it away. So a smile found its way on your lips, the sweetest smile he had ever seen that made him feel like he could die right than and there.

"Bakugou!" You said, walking towards him. "You're late."

#bnha scenarios #mha imagines #bakugou x reader #bnha x you #bakugou katsuki x reader #bnha bakugou #bakugou imagine #mha bakugou #bnha x reader #bnha bakugo katsuki #mha x reader #mha bakugo katsuki #katsukibakugou

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jk9bangtan · 4 years ago

Text

ƬΉΣ ΉΛƬΣ YӨЦ GΛVΣ -5-

Series: (✎) On going

Genre: ♔ Smut / ♤Romance / ♘ Angst

Warnings: lots and lots of angst, a lot of hurtful feelings, angry Jungkook, Jungkook Jealous, swearing, calling names. (Sorry if I forgot anything)

Author’s note: This book is kinda weird and has unique plot but believe me everything will go smoothly and the way you guys want it.

Teaser: “I don’t love you. I don’t. All of this was planed. He told me that he will give me money if I gave you to him in our wedding night and that’s why I married you. I love money I don’t love you”

Word Count: 1184

Exclaimer: This ff has nothing to do with real life events. Everything in this ff is from my imagination. The characters are not real (well, Jungkook is real but he doesn’t act this way in real life... you know what I mean)

Parts: part1, part2, part3, part4, part5,…..??

Taglist: @jiminiepabo95 @giadalin @jungkooksseuphoria

Jungkook stormed into the old man's office. Many thoughts kept coming to his mind. Why is she working here? Why did he put her with him and Taehyung? Does that mean she will do what they usually do in their work? Did Taehyung know that she is going to work here? And when the fuck did they meet each other? All of those questions were roaming in his mind.

However, they all faded away when he saw y/n and Taehyung walking towards him. Jungkook looked at y/n wanting to ask her every single question that lingered in his mind but y/n didn't give a glance towards him. She only walked past him as if he wasn't there.

Jungkook didn't do anything, he just stood there, his gaze on her figure that was consecutively departing away from him.

"What is this?!" Jungkook harshly asked turning towards mr.Kim.

"What was what?" Mr.kim asked back with a smirk on his face.

"It impossible for y/n to work with us! She doesn't even know what we do here."

Jungkook slammed his hand on the table, his eyes never moving away from mr. Kim.

"Believe me, she knows what your and Taehyung's job is in this company. I told her yesterday and than asked her if she could work with both of you because as you know she you somehow need a girl in your job so that you could take care of better things." Mr.Kim said leaning back in his chair.

Jungkook deeply exhaled trying to calm himself. He didn't want y/n to be part of their filthy work.

"You should go find Taehyung and y/n. Taehyung took her to her office and he told me that he will help her with everything else. You should also go and help. You and Taehyung should always stay around y/n, because I somehow fell that y/n will not be very welcomed by her colleagues here." Mr.kim said as he stood up walking his way towards the bid glassed window.

Jungkook quickly turned around and walked his way out of the office without even saying a word.

Jungkook kept walking through the company's corridors searching for y/n's office. He kept searching and searching. Will he can't help it, the company is a big one and he had no idea were exactly her office is.

Jungkook walked his way towards Taehyung's office hopping to see him with her there or maybe see him alone and ask him about her office which is a better idea for him.

As soon as Jungkook arrived in front of Taehyung's office his eyes caught a sign if two people sitting in the opposite office that was surrounded with a glass wall.

Jungkook frowned and his eyebrows furrowed when his gaze landed on Y/n laughing hard and he knew that it was probably one if Taehyung's incomprehensible jokes. That always used to make him laugh so hard just they way y/n is laughing now.

A smile crept into his face as he kept watching his wife laughing but his smile quickly faded away as soon as he saw Taehyung place a hand on top of y/n head ruffling her hair. He gulped trying to erase weird feelings that suddenly raised in his chest. 'Calm down Jungkook you have no rights to feel this way. You have no rights.' He kept telling himself gaze still stuck in both of the people that he loved the most in his life. One is his wife and the other one is one of his closest friend that he even calls him brother.

"See!" a sudden voice came from beside him taking him out of his thoughts.

He looked beside him for a second and then quickly turned away sighing when he recognized the annoying person standing beside him.

"I wasn't lying! She really is a slut. After an old man placed his arm around her she came here to have fun with Taehyung this time." Ari spat a devilish smirk in her face.

"Shut up and go away" Jungkook warned glaring at her.

"Seriously are you this dump! Can't you see how she's acting. She is a slut." Ari said her voice getting louder.

"Shut up, I said" Jungkook hissed back as he grabbed her from the wrist twisting it behind her back.

" Hahaha!" Ari started laughing trying to free her hand.

"I know why you are acting like this! There must be som between you and that bitch! Right?! Am I wrong?!" She asked with a raised eyebrow. Jungkook quickly looked to the side trying to hide any expression that showed her what she said is right. But he was wrong, this move itself proves that what she said is right.

"I knew it! There is really something between you too!" She said laughing harder and harder.

"Shut the fuck up! There is nothing between me and her" Jungkook quickly talked back trying to prove her wrong.

"Yes there is. The way you kept looking at her few minutes ago explains it all!" She said back.

"No! There is nothing between me and her!" Jungkook kept trying to convince her there is nothing between them but she wasn't having it.

"If there is nothing between you and her than kiss me. Kiss me here and right now. Just to prove that you have never thing special for her." She said smirking.

Jungkook suddenly stopped breathing. What is she trying to do? I can't do this, not with y/n right in front of me. Jungkook told himself but then also remember that he have to prove to this girl that there is nothing between him and y/n. If he didn't, everybody will know about y/n being his wife and then that old man will know and then he will definitely tell everybody about y/n being with him with the worst part being you still married to him. He didn't care about the old man or himself, what he cared about was y/n. Everybody will talk about her. Everybody will hate her. Everybody will bully her, will call her names. And he didn't like the feeling that just came by him imagining those events.

Jungkook leaned in, his face slowly getting nearer and nearer to her face. Jungkook gulped trying to calm him self. He doesn't wanted he hates it. He hates this girl standing in front of him. But he has to do it.

Jungkook's lips touched hers making his stomach flop in disgust at his actions. He found the girl pressing herself more and more to him trying in whatever way to deepen the kiss. Jungkook opened his eyes wanting to break the kiss and move away. But his eyes met with someone else's eyes. His eyes widened as her expression took over Jungshook's mind. He swore that he knew at that moment that he completely fucked up everything. Even the hope of y/n looking at him for once for the rest of his life. That hope was gone too.

MASTERLIST

Any idea what would happen next cause I have no idea :(

Guys give me some crazy ideas!

#Jungkook #jeonjungkook #bts #jealousy #hate #cheating #hurting #kookie #meankookie #Taehyung #y/n #Jungkookff #jungkooksmut #Jungkookhusband #jungkookoneshot

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evilvarric666-archive · 3 years ago

Note

This is gonna be long, so sorry in advance, but as someone who enjoys long fics here are my two cents:

I get why some ppl may not want 75 tags in fics, but this is gonna hurt long fic writers. On a long fic there are probably gonna be more relationships that are central to the plot that aren't the main ship. And side pairings that may be a squick to some ppl. Not to mention trigger warnings and tone tags.

For example: a long fic with the pairing Y x Z. Z had an abusive relationship, and that's gonna be explored. So the author tags abusive relationship, bc that's a trigger, but an explanation next tag saying "not current ship" or smth.

Then Y has very important friendships with some of the cast. These are central to the plot so they're tagged too.

Turns out, character W is controversial in the fandom, but they're central to the fic too. The author is gonna tag after the character tag W positive/negative; so ppl who don't wanna see positive/negative things about W can skip this.

And guess what? Ship A x B appears in this fic too. Maybe it's not that central, but this ship is also disliked by some people, so the author will tag it, so ppl can filter through.

Another problem is with media that has different mediums, like, the media Y, Z, etc are from has movies, and books, and games and a tv show. All these things actually have different stories, different enough at least that ppl may only want to see fics written for the movies! But the author wants to take plot from the movies and the books. So instead of just tagging the all media tag for that media, they also tag media (movies) and media (books)

These tags end up accumulating. And especially in long fics. The author could make the first chapter a list of tws and stuff that they keep updating, but that destroys the purpose of ao3 tags: you can't filter content like that, you can only filter tags.

I honestly think they should just find a way to delete the fics with the trolling tags, or make a readmore thing so it doesn't hurt the browsing. At the very least make the tag limit longer.

sorry in advance that this is going to be rambly and weird. I have a lot of thoughts.

I get where you're coming from but I also still disagree. Like it's definitely going to change the way longfic writers tag, but I really don't think it's going to hurt them. I think it's going to encourage more effective tagging and that that's going to be better for everybody in the long run. If anything, I think that overtagging is what's hurting longfic writers, it makes their works look unappealing, and actually important information gets buried in a wall of text.

i will admit though that I do understand better now why less room for trigger tagging is going to be an issue. My preferred tagging style is "General/umbrella warnings in the tags, with whatever elaboration/specifics the author deems necessary in an author's note/author's notes at the beginning of each chapter" (example: "animal death" in the tags, so that the filters catch it + people who can't handle the subject At All know to keep scrolling, and then the author's note specifying that its in the context of game hunting & not a pet death, so that people who were uncertain and needed more info could click in and get the specifics.) and I thought that preference was pretty universal? But apparently a lot of people use the tags as an exhaustive list of warnings, which I didn't know because when I see a work with more than, well with more than 75 tags, I just start scrolling until it's gone.

(this is a tangent and I get that my experiences are not universal. but I genuinely dislike full warning lists in the tags because, for me at least, it makes it harder for me to figure out if the story is something I can/want to read. The things I Really Do Not Want To Read about are rare, and rarely tagged the same way twice, so the exclusion filter isn't really helpful for me. I have to actually read the full list of warnings and if the things I'm looking for are sandwiched inbetween a bunch of trope/character tags in a big wall o text I am going to miss it. This has happened to me multiple times.)

I think that that's an ineffective tagging style, basically. Lots of tags is kind of the opposite of useful tags, imo. Short, to the point and consistently worded warnings are better and I think having less space will encourage people to do that. I understand why people do this other style, though, and also why it would frustrate them that they can no longer do that. I think it really sucks that ao3 let everyone wild west their website for so long that it managed to spawn like three distinct groups of people who all use the website in completely incompatible ways, and now it's at the point where any new rule implemented is going to screw a lot of people over no matter what. But I digress.

Anyways, as long as someone isn't putting Revolutionary Girl Utena levels of warnings in their tags (and if your fic needs that much... maybe you should just put yur top 10 biggest warnings on there and slap a Dead Dove Do Not Eat on the end there, yknow?), I think that 75 tags will fully accommodate them. I get that tags start adding up, but also I think a lot of people are underestimating how many tags 75 tags is.

Like to just add up how many tags are used in your example: three / pairing tags, lets go crazy and say three more & pairing tags, tag every character tag in those pairings that's twelve, #abusive relationship + #not main pairing tags, three fandom tags bc multiple source mediums, a #[controversial character] positive tag... that's 24 tags. Like all the necessary character & pairing tags are handled in less than a third of the space given (and personally I consider this slightly over tagged. I think the only character tags you should put on a fic are the very mainest/pov characters, but yknow) and honestly if you can't then figure out a way to communicate the rest of the necessary information about your fic in 51 tags and a 1250 character summary then I really don't know how to help you. I personally would have to really push myself to figure out how to put more than 75 tags on one fic, regardless of the length of the fic. And I can't help but notice that a lot of the fics I could find with over 75 tags while searching last night had a lot of... unnecessary duplicate tags, often for information that could've been easily otherwise intuited (tagging #mandolorian #mandolore #mandolorian character and #mandolorian culture on a Jango Fett pre-series fic, for example)

I do have some criticisms about the current change though. I think it would've been better to have individual tag number limits for each individual field (x number of fandom tags, x number of character tags, etc.) instead of a 75 tags over all limit (or make a "warning tags" field that's separate from "additional tags" but that's a separate essay and would... probably mean overhauling the whole site. so not very practical.) A readmore option would be good too, and I'm not sure why they didn't go for that? I also think that this change will be most effective if done in combination with other changes. Like posting very loosely or not at all enforced official tagging/style guides for the site. I really think that even a tepid attempt at standardization will increase the site's usability like, A Lot.

I'm not sure how cohesive that was. TL;DR I appreciate hearing your thoughts, mine are that I still think this is a step in the right direction. And that cutting back on overtagging will lead to more concise, effective tagging which will make browsing and filtering easier in the long run.

#ao3 tag

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watchinglikeafangirl · 4 years ago

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Kiss Me Again - first reactions

Out of boredom, I started watching Kiss Me Again also because I've already watched Dark Blue Kiss. I saw many people saying both shows should be seen as two seperable things because some important details got lost on the way of making spin-off.

Let's see how much of a difference there actually is. From what I've heard, Pete is going to be very different. Anyway, here are my first reactions during the watching process:

Episode 1

Oh well, Pete is so different. He's a whole other person here. He's the typical cool guy who just wants to show off but at the same time, he's a bit socially awkward and I love it. This faked boredom and annoyment are only there because he doesn't know what to say when Kao is around and especially when they are alone because the atmosphere is just weird between them. Acting all annoyed is his way of socializing and I like it because I believve we all have weird tactics to try to lighten the mood or find a topic with peopl we don't know. Here, Pete is "annoyed" to look cool but I guess, he does this because he tries to find something they both can agree on and annoyment is the simpliest way. You can easily agree with people on negative emotions concearning a topic, so it's the easiest choice to pretend to be annoyed. What's funny here is that Kao is really not impressed by it and already knows Pete just wants to be cool. I think, Kao just doesn't like Pete in the beginning because he sees Pete is just pretending and is never true. I guess, that's why he will fall for him later, because they will probably have real talks and bonding moments.

Episode 2

Okay, Pete and Kao shared an awkward kiss and now things are even more weird. Here's one difference to the Pete I know from Dark Blue Kiss: he's not honest. Now, whenever Kao wants to address the kiss, Pete gets defensive and aggressive. Yes, it's probably because of his confusion but in Dark Blue Kiss, Pete always addresses everything - even the uncomfortable or negatively loaded topics - but not at this moment.

And also, I know, Pete is not the nicest person at this moment but he is really respectless. After the kiss, he stares into Kao's eyes in surprise, pulls away and then wipes his mouth in disgust more than once. As if Kao's lips and the taste of them are dirt on his lips and that's so disrespectful. Kao is obiously hurt by it and I would be too. Of course, you are allowed to not like a kiss but reacting so disgusted is very harsh.

Episode 3

And now, Pete is bullying Kao by isolating him from the group. He makes the others believe Kao doesn't like them, so he will end up being the king of the group since Kao is not the kind of person who talks about such things and just accepts the circumstances.

The scene between So and Sansuay in the parking lot was obviously not right bahavior on So's part because Sansuay was clearly uncomfortable being pressed against another car. She had no way out and I love the random dude walking by and just checking if she is okay. No romanticizing. Just a statement that this behavior is wrong.

Episode 4

Pete and Kao now claim to be "annoyed" of each other and all the other ones are still left wondering what the real problem is.

But at least, Pete confides to Sandee and confesses he only gets angry because of the kiss. I mean, we as the audience understand him better but I just find Sandee's frustration very amusing. Pete is obviously not realizing his feelings and is just helpless. Sandee is such a mood.

Until now, I really don't like R at all. He is pushing Sanwan around and invades her ersonal space all the time while saying he cares. Dude, if you care, don't force her, don't drag her into your car and especially don't kiss her when she doesn't want to.

Episode 5

Its just my speculation but I'm pretty sure Pete is bisexual because he has an ex-girlfriend (we know of) but seems to be attracted to both gender and he's not the kind of guy who falls for the personality or character of someone. The gender matters to him, I would say. But it's nice to see a bisexual character because mostly shows want to tell me that people are either homo- or heterosexual but there are obviously many other sexualities in between. Living in a gay relationship doesn't mean you define yourself as homosexual, real life doesn't work like that and I like they give us a character who is neither homo- or heterosexual.

What's going on with the men in that show? WHy are there so many red flags? Except for Kao, Mat and Sun, everybody pushes the women around and invades their personal space in a very uncomforting manner. Are they all going to "change"? I don't know if I will be able to believe them...

Episode 6

Mat's mother wants Sanson to "turn her son straight"? Okay, just gonna leave that there because I don't have words how wrong this thought is.

Oh, the scene which I saw many gifs of, happened. But I thought Pete and Kao would spend more time laying in the grass. I though this was a very romantic scene. But it's just a second long. But who cares, their relationship took a next step. They stop fighting and come to some sort of agreement (the agreement being that fighting is pointless). But somehow this scene feels like they broke the ice and finally found peace.

Episode 7

And again, a scene I've seen very often: the hospital. But it's really sweet they all went there because of Pete and wait all together until he can go home. That's real friendship and I think this show portrays their friend group really accurate because they are so natural with each other. They are a bunch of people thrown together who bond over weird fun talks at night and getting home drunk. Even though they are so different, they are loyal and trustworthy. It's heartwarming to see a group of friends be portrayed like this because mostly in shows, the protagonist has one really good friend and just a few people they know but are not very close to. but a group of friends is exactly this and it's rare on TV because showing a whole group bonding is difficult and also because they dynamic is totally different.

Episode 8

Kao (giving me the chills): Mint, even if he doesn't like you back, it doesn't mean you are not good enough. No matter how beautiful you are, no matter how good you try to be to him, if he's not into you, he's not the one for you.

I can't believe So gets away with stealing Sansuay's phone. She will never know it was him. I don't know what to think about him.

Epsiode 9

Sun flirting with Kao over coffee makes me cringe so much right now. This is uncomfortable and not as romantic as Sun may think it is. And then, Kao is scared Sun meant him, this is uncomforting to watch. Also, I really don't think Kao and Sun are a match. It doesn't fit at all and I hope it will be over soon.

What? Wayu wants to rape Sanwan? Did I miss something? How did we get here? I thought this was a warm show for teenagers. Now there's rape? I could deal with the sexual harassment even though that was not fine to watch, but rape? I'm confused how we got there? But of course, R saved her.

Not Mork casually cleaning his gun...

Episode 10

I love the fact Pete and Kao just quietly accept the fact they spend a night together. It happened and they can't change it. They don't even mention it and I'm relieved there's no "don't ever tell anybody" or something. It just happened and that's it. Nothing further to dicuss about it. Also, they made pretty clear already they have certain feelings for each other. The wuestio now is just how they are going to deal with this and if they will be in a relationship.

Kao: I will stop seeing other people when things between us become clearer.

Episode 11

I can't believe they actually address the bullying I mentioned before. Kao is very right when he says Pete needs to earn his trust because of the past. This is just right because you can't forget the past just because of romantic feelings. If you don't address the other person made you feel ad, you won't be able to move on from that and relationships are about trust, so I find this very mature and good for both of them. Pete needs to understand he hurt Kao in the past and can't just change his mind over night and Kao will say yes right away.

A planned engagement? Isn't that a bit old-fashioned? Sanwan and R don't know each other at all and why would their parents decide this for them. It doesn't look like it would be good for family's business or something. This seems so random.

And Wayu tries to rape Sanwan again? How? Why? And what is wrong with Sindee for initializing this? But of course, R saves her again.

Episode 12

Oh Mint. I always had mixed feelings about her and now i know for what reason. Is she fine? Making someone feel bad for leeting her go by threatening she would hurt herself is not healthy or normal or anything. That's a serious matter. No wonder, Pete feels like his life is messed up and is extremely stressed about it. And then, Mint woders why he's not comfortable at all and doens't see Pete just let her stay out of fear her threat might be the truth. Because he's a nice person. But Mint is just crazy and plays mind games.

I've never seen a drunk kiss be that cute and meaningful. They are just pure. Now, I really know why people love Pete and Kao so much. I already fell in love with their dynamic in Dark Blue Kiss but seeing the beginnings of their relationship tops that. This script is too good. They both know, the kiss meant a lot and I like they are way past the regretment state. Or at least, they don't regret the kiss. They regret they are not in a relationship which makes the atmosphere afterwards more sad and hurt. Again, they are so mature about this.

Mint took a picture? I can't with this woman.

Episode 13

Why did tehy not report Wayu? They are covering up a crime. And Sanwan doesn't seem to be traumatized which makes me wonder a lot. She is more than fine and I'm not buying Wanyu's apology at all.

And now Mint send the picture to Pete's dad. Does she have no shame? It's not her right to out Pete. That's a thing between Pete, his dad and Kao. Mint has and nothing to do with it and shouldn't have ever. She took Pete's power away by letting his dad now. Things were in Pete's hands and I hope Pete will tell mint very clearly she had no right to do that and her behavior is wrong.

Wow, Pat has guts. Telling your best friend you like them even though you know they don'yt like you is very brave. I love Mat being so cool with it because it's obviously a hard moment for Pat to outlive.

Episode 14

I love Pete's dad. They both were so scared but he doesn't say anything and I like what he says. He talks with them like they are adults (which they are) and doesn't talk to them like they are kids who don't know anything. They don't need to be lectured by their parents. They are adults already and make their own life decisions. I like very much he has this calm talk with them and then drops the topic.

Sanson being the first to confess fits very good because mAt is alway the wuieter one of them. This scene is so bittersweet and Sanson is so vulnerable, it hurts my heart. If it stays like this, then it would be a strong statement of the show because not everything works out in the end. You can try, you can ask, but in the end, maybe your efforts were all for nothing.

Finally, Pete calls Mint out. But he forgives her?... But at least, he doesn't want to be her friend any more.

Of corse we have happy endings all over the place.

#kiss me again #dark blue kiss #pete x kao #suddenly phupha and nam(atoats) are there #why doesn't prize just leave?#and what is boss (2gether) doing there?#can somebody please report him?#i still like rain #and mork #and i still don't like sun #but pete and kao are so pure #i can't

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imzadi-caskett-huddy · 4 years ago

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In My Veins (1/?)

House, M.D. Fanfic

This story takes place after the end of the series, following Wilson's death. Sorry, it had to be done for story purposes. If you've read my other fic, you know I'm a Huddy fan. This will be very Huddy. Maybe I can give them a better ending than the show.

Obviously, I don't own the show or characters. If I did, Huddy would have had a happier ending. Also, the title is based on the song "In My Veins" by Andrew Belle, which I don't own either. I highly recommend looking it up and giving it a listen. It just feels Huddy for me in regards to this story.

A huge thank you to @love-hope-faith-feels-like-a-lie for taking all of my crazy ideas and giving me honest feedback on all of my Huddy stuff, and for analyzing them with me!

This story is not as fleshed out on paper as it is in my head and will definitely be slower to update than my other fic, but it is still very much being worked on. This one is just more complicated. Please bear with me, and I hope you like what I've done! As always, feedback and comments are welcome. This story isn't as unchangeable, so predictions or something you might like to see or analyzing things are welcome too. It might be something I hadn't thought of yet.

She'd known she'd find him here. She'd known he would come after everyone else had left. She needed to see him. She just needed to know that he was okay. Her car showed to a stop, and when she got out, she saw the all too familiar figure of the man who had broken her heart... the man she couldn't help but still be in love with.

"I heard you were dead," she stated evenly as she approached the gravesite.

"I am." The familiar voice hadn't startled him. But he was very surprised she was there... and even more surprised that she didn't seem surprised to see him. "I only had you and Wilson. You left. Wilson died. Now I've got nothing," he murmured lowly after a few moments. It was useless to try hiding everything from her. She knew him almost as well as he knew her. She would wait him out until he broke. She had more patience than Wilson where he was concerned.

"I left because you drove a car through my dining room!"

"You left before that."

"When we broke up," she realized. She had expected this conversation. She'd been preparing for it the entire week before the funeral.

He just gave her a silent look. "You're not surprised to see me," he commented, looking away from her.

She just looked at him. And he could tell. "Wilson told you I wasn't really dead."

---flashback---

She stood there staring at the fresh grave, feeling... she wasn't sure what exactly she was feeling. What was she even supposed to feel? Hurt? Anger? Grief? A sense of loss bigger than she wanted to admit, bigger than she'd thought possible. When she first heard she was numb. She didn't want to believe it. There was no way the man who had caused her so much grief, who she had watched pull through so many other life threatening instances, was dead. She'd actually come to believe he was too damn stubborn to die. And then she found a wry smile tugging at the corners of her lips, despite her best efforts, as she heard the all too familiar voice of the man in question echoing in her head: "Everybody dies."

She couldn't stop the slow, silent tears as they slid down her cheeks. She didn't wipe them away either, instead allowing herself to feel, trying to process and label what exactly she was feeling. She'd told him once that she loved him, she couldn't help it. And now it was so very clear just how true those words were.

After spotting her, Wilson allowed her a few moments of privacy to grieve before walking over. "It's good to see you. I wasn't sure you'd come, considering."

Cuddy glanced up at him, brushing her finger under her eyes to try to look presentable. "Of course I'd come," she said quietly. "He was the most incredible man I've ever known." She had said those words to House only a couple years ago.

"The man did drive a car through your house," Wilson reminded her. Maybe bringing that up would remind her of all the shit House had done so she wouldn't be so upset.

"I had to see for myself that he was..." she trailed off, unable to say the word. It was completely insane, really. She was a doctor. She dealt with life and death every day. And now she couldn't even bring herself to say the word where he was concerned. "You're a terrible doctor," she could hear that familiar smug voice again. God, he was never going to be out of her head. "Maybe if I'd been there..."

"You could have, what? Saved him?" Wilson asked, arching an eyebrow.

She just gave him a silent look. She was beating herself up... she was feeling guilty that she hadn't been there to at least try to save him. For a long time she'd been the only one who could... from many things. This time she wasn't there, and now he was dead.

Wilson saw the guilt she felt at not being there to be his savior this time. "You always were his heart," he commented then, making a decision. He sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. He wasn't going to let House keep hurting her. "He's not dead."

"Wilson..." she started, realizing her friend was probably processing his own grief and loss. He must be in denial.

"He's not. It's fake." He then went into detail about how House faked his death and the reasoning behind it.

For the second time in a week, Cuddy felt numb. And the familiar anger only House could provoke in her flared. "That son of a bitch..." she almost growled.

---end flashback---

She was quiet for a moment. "He saw me at your grave. He knew I was upset."

"I told him it wouldn't make a difference to you."

"How could you think that?!"

He shrugged. "I was already dead to you. Actually being dead would serve as an improvement. Then you wouldn't be tortured by guilt over how much you hate me."

"I've never been able to hate you, House."

"I've got a lot of memories that would beg to differ." He saw the look on her face then. "Fine, not a lot of memories. But a handful." He was quiet for another moment. "One memory."

She was silent. What was she supposed to say? That she forgives him? She doesn't. "Two, actually," she finally stated. They both knew what the first was. But at his questioning look on the second, she turned away and looked straight ahead. "You made me think you were dead," she stated lowly. She had been almost as angry at that as she had been when he drove into her house. She felt he needed to know that.

He was quiet for a moment, processing what she said. He hadn't expected her anger at his fake death, though he realized now that maybe he should have. "And yet here you are," he finally commented, studying her.

"Wilson was my friend too."

"That explains why you came to the funeral... which you already knew I wouldn't be at since I'd be keeping up the appearance that I was dead. That doesn't explain why you're HERE," he explained. "You knew I was alive the entire time. You knew coming here now, after everyone else is gone... you knew I'd be here."

The way he still knew her and could cut through any facade she could concoct about why she was there, surprisingly caught her off guard for a moment. She quickly managed to cover the shocked expression in her eyes.

"You came to check on me," he stated, unable to hide the slightest trace of an amused smile. She did still care about him...at least a little. "Why?" He couldn't help but ask, couldn't help but try to push her buttons.

She just looked at him for a moment, her temper flaring a bit as she'd seen his smile. "We all have our vices," she replied, her voice echoing the same time it had taken nearly three years ago when she'd told him that she couldn't help but love him, turning on her heel to walk back to her car. He was an ass. She should have known better than to see him. She should have just gone back to her life... left him dead. In less than five minutes, he'd already managed to open Pandora's box inside her once again. And it was true... she was an addict, same as him. He was addicted to Vicoden, but she was just as addicted to him.

Her words caught him off guard, or at least the truth in them, the implication they carried had surprised him. And he did the only thing he knew to do. He followed behind her. "Wanna get a drink?" He asked, almost allowing himself to hope.

She had opened the door already, but paused, just before she got in her car. She told herself he'd just lost his best friend... his world was probably crashing down. And for as much as she told herself no, told herself it was a bad idea, she remembered the times her world had been crashing down around her and he'd been the one there. He was there through her struggle with IVF... he'd been there when she'd lost the first baby she tried to adopt. It was time to return the favor. "Get in the car."

#house #house x cuddy #house m.d.#house md #house fanfic #huddy #greg house #lisa cuddy

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