#but also because of all that i'll probably need to take couple more commissions

[kawamamilosc]

it's only january but already so many stressful things happened that i'm already so mentally drained i really don't know how i'll survive the rest of this year.

there were a lot more things that happened which are private and related to my family and i won't talk about it here. other stuff is that i actually had to take couple of days off work because mentally i just couldn't handle it but unfortunately i won't get paid for those days (which just adds to my stress), right now i'm waiting for a call so i can pick up jojo (my cat) after his surgery and also today our shower broke and if we're lucky they will fix it tomorrow

: (

[teambyler]

How the Duffers likely will make the general audience AWARE of Byler and CHEER for Byler

First the TL;DR. They'll probably do it with:

Revealing the Painting Lie

Will comes out to Mike

Will gets bullied for being gay, and Mike must make a choice

Mike and Will face danger together, alone, for the 1st time

And I'll spell out exactly how and why!

We in the Byler fandom have our theories: Flickergate, Lettergate, Churchgate, etc. While totally fun and while it would be amazing if they became reality, they don't answer the question of how the Duffers would manage audience expectations to make them accept and cheer for Byler.

Because we all know the reality: on a surface level, season 4 ended with a grand "love confession" from Mike to El. It appeared to have culminated a four-year arc that started from show's beginning. For the vast majority of viewers, a Byler relationship will be a HUGE SURPRISE.

This isn't just heteronormativity; it's also the fact that in every slow-burn romantic relationship in fiction, the story needs to openly tease "Will they or won't they?" for a while first. The audience needs to start thinking that these 2 characters (1) MIGHT be together, and (2) eventually that they SHOULD be together and cheer for them!

For Jonathan and Nancy, there were a lot of moments suggesting they MIGHT be together in Season 1. Then in Season 2, we had THIS episode that made the audience think Nancy absolutely SHOULD be with Jonathan instead of Steve:

The show then dragged things out MORE before their first kiss.

Anti-Bylers raise a fair point that there "isn't enough time" to replace a relationship that seemed to have been "fulfilled" at the end of s4, with an entirely different one. Of course, the ground has been laid for four seasons, but HOW EXACTLY can the Duffers make the audience accept and cheer for Byler, after seeming to have "built up Mike and El for 4 seasons"?

Showing Byler is POSSIBLE:

First, the most obvious (and elegant) way for the Duffers to accomplish this is by revealing the Painting Lie.

The main things that make the General Audience/GA dismiss the idea that Mike likes Will back are that he (1) confessed "I love you" to El and (2) said things like "it's not my fault you don't like girls" and "we're FRIENDS" that suggest he can't be gay or bi.

The show has to address these two things, and there are ways that are pretty obvious.

The fact that El had no role in the painting COMPLETELY undercuts the "I love you" confession in the GA's mind. Milevens completely underestimate how this will affect Mike and El's relationship and how the audience will view it. El didn't commission the painting. When Will gave the painting, he wasn't describing El, but himself. Mike confessed his love to this false picture of El; one that was actually WILL.

When El finds out, she'll realize that Mike said he loved her based on a LIE. She'll realize that she accurately clocked Mike for not loving her when they argued in s4. It's likely that she'll take the initiative to break up or take a break in their relationship. (El deciding this will assuage concern that Will being with Mike would "betray" his own sister.) Mike might desperately try to repair things. Even if he does, this will show the GA that Mike's struggle for an entire season to say he loved El -- already very concerning for a romantic couple -- was a complete fiasco, and that Mike and El will PROBABLY NOT end up together.

Mike (and the GA) will be confronted with the fact that Mike felt romantic love for the first time because Will described HIMSELF. It will be apparent that Will would be a more suitable romantic interest... if he were a girl. =) It's just too bad that "Mike is probably straight"!

Now how to deal with that misconception?

We come to our OTHER Chekhov's gun that needs to fire: Will comes out to Mike. Will is still closeted at the end of s4, and his right to be out and find happiness is clearly central to his future arc. This HAS to be resolved. And he HAS to come out to his mom and his BEST FRIEND.

When he comes out to Mike, he of course won't spurn Will. Will probably explains he didn't come out earlier because he was afraid Mike would be homophobic because of what he'd said that summer, "It's not my fault you don't like girls":

If Will does, then Mike will have to explain why he said it. First, Mike probably apologizes and makes clear he accepts Will. The show (maybe Mike himself) might remind us that he defended Will from homophobia in s1. But this makes the GA wonder "Then why did he say it then?" And Mike might be exceedingly defensive when explaining himself. Will coming out to Mike is a golden opportunity to show the GA that NOT EVERYTHING IS AS IT SEEMS, and Mike might be dealing with internalized homophobia.

That's one way to signal that Mike might be gay or bi. And there's another!

We've been told that Season 5 returns to Season 1 themes. The Core Four are probably bullied for the Hellfire Club, and Will might be bullied for being gay. Ross Duffer says that s5 will center on Will's "emotional arc" and his "coming into his own as a young man," so his confronting homophobia in an 80s small town is quite likely. Since Mike and Will are joined at the hip in s5, the same accusation could easily extend to Mike. All this means that Mike will be confronted with the CHOICE of whether he'll stand up to anti-gay bullying. (Perhaps this is why there's a BTS pic of Mike with a bruise on his face?) It might be strongly implied to the GA that Mike is standing up, not only for Will, but for himself. Shrewd viewers would see the parallel to Mike defending Will from homophobia in s1, making them rethink that scene as well. (Defending Will would also clearly parallel Jonathan fighting Steve in s1, which showed Nancy that "only love makes you that crazy sweetheart, and that damn stupid.")

How Season 5 can make the GA CHEER for Byler:

Showing Byler is possible is the main obstacle; next is the much easier, and FUN (and agonizing) part!

First, the show has put Will through so much trauma and made clear how selfless he is, that the audience already wants him to have a happy ending. He almost certainly will suffer again in s5. We probably are reminded that as a gay person in the 80s he believes he's "not gonna fall in love." Meanwhile, the show has made clear that his love for Mike is PAINFULLY deep and won't simply go away.

Once the GA sees the POSSIBILITY of a Mike/Will romance as per above, their mental floodgates will open. As Jancy shows, It doesn't take much to get the audience to root for a relationship, after the seeds are planted. And Byler has FOUR SEASONS of seeds for the GA to look back on with fresh eyes!

How to recall those 4 seasons of material? We already know that Will is in danger and we'll see a return of "leader Mike" in s5. This likely will include callbacks (and even flashbacks) to Mike and Will's relationship in s1 and s2. There's the newly-filmed flashback from when they were young kids. This all will bring their long-time closeness to the fore in viewers' minds. But with the artifice of Mike's relationship with El knocked away, they will see it as potentially romantic and realize that this show seems to have secretly been building them up as a romantic couple all along.

Add to all that: we likely will have Will and Mike facing danger together, alone, for the first time:

It was Jonathan and Nancy facing danger together in s1 that made the vast majority of viewers ship Jancy. Mike and Will facing danger will put their LOVE (remember: the audience already accepts them as best friends who love each other!) and their willingness to RISK THEIR LIVES for each other to the fore. Callbacks, flashbacks, and dialogue will remind the GA of their sacrifices for each other: Mike putting Will before everything in s1 and s2, and Will sacrificing his feelings to help Mike be with El. They might hug each other after a near-death experience and have a mutual Gay Panic, which will be a callback (and contrast) to their non-hug at the airport. Millions will say "They should just kiss already."

There are SO MANY WAYS to get the audience cheering for Byler.

Will probably lives in Mike's house because the Byers don't have their own house in Hawkins anymore. Mike, if he doesn't know already at the season's start, will KNOW the painting came from Will and wonder if it was romantic. The tension between them in s5 will make s4 look like nothing in comparison.

When Will comes out to him, Mike might ask, "Is... there anyone you like?"

He'll ask NERVOUSLY, like he once did before:

Will probably won't answer honestly; he might make up another boy! ("I met him in California. We like a lot of the same things. He even likes D&D...") To which Mike says, "COOL." (BTW, this is one way the show could make viewers reassess and understand the awkward airport reunion!) This leads to a new cycle of these two boys thinking their love is unrequited LOL.

Only this time the General Audience will be fully aware of it. The miscommunication trope widely used in fictional TV romances will not only tell the GA that Byler should happen, but WILL happen. Will and Mike become THE "Will they or won't they?" couple that everyone is talking about. Mike's sexuality and his feelings for Will probably aren't officially revealed until mid or late season in order to let the excitement build. If Season 5 is released in more than one volume, there will be a flurry of videos and articles revisiting past seasons, finding evidence of Mike's feelings for Will that we Bylers have analyzed and curated for years. Except for a few vocal homophobes, the show will make the GA (even people who don't watch analysis videos online) fully onboard with a Byler conclusion before it happens; the SHOW ITSELF will set-up and tease it and make the GA desperately want these boys to "just kiss already."

Season 5 will be messy. And glorious. And the most Byler season of all.

-teambyler

[billythesimp]

His Starlight

⋘ 𝑙𝑜𝑎𝑑𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑑𝑎𝑡𝑎...

I was requested for write more Billy headcanons with a fem!s/o so here's some short snippets. So thank you for the request! I'll be opening requests after I finish another piece so letting you all know ahead.

𝑃𝑙𝑒𝑎𝑠𝑒 𝑤𝑎𝑖𝑡...⋙

tagging: None

tw: none

⋈ Billy makes some strange decisions at time, either cuz he’s trying to be cheap in order to save more, or he’s just not thinking straight and makes an impromptu purchase. As his s/o, you’re able to reel him in and help him make smarter decisions that’ll leave him so grateful that you care as much to aid him. Of course, this doesn’t count when he decides to splurge on you, because his girlfriend deserves only the best.

⋈ The girls in the Cunning Hares have at least met you a couple times before, after all they do care for Billy so only want to know who his new girlfriend is. That being said, Nicole is probably the one who can see the benefits of keeping you around, only to drop them once she sees just how much you adore their android friend that they’ve started noticing changes in him that are for the better. He still is goofy and oftentimes causing a ruckus with the others, but he’s become more thoughtful and acknowledges when things are going wrong or when they need to make a decisive decision in their work or expenses. Nicole doesn’t mind having you come around often, as long as you don’t become another mouth to feed. 

⋈ Best part of having such a cute girlfriend is being able to binge watch movies together and go out on dates. His favorites being the ones where they explore Lumina Square and stop to take photos. Of course, he loves doing the iconic poses from his favorite shows and movies, impersonating the actors to the point that it embarrasses you but he does it in a loving matter. But he also loves taking photos of you, drinking coffee at the Tin man’s shop, fawning over the shop bangboos, or even experimenting with the makeup in the salon there. He has a whole file saved of his favorite moments from your dates. 

⋈ Of course, dating Billy has its cons. For one he is usually cold to the touch because he’s made of metal and need to have his joints lubricated. But no worries, he does his best to maintain himself and makes subtle changes that you wouldn’t have noticed otherwise. Like buying a heating module to help increase his body heat, though the dealer he bought it from was kinda sketchy and now he overheats too quickly just from seeing your cute face. And when it comes to lubrates, he gets only the finest of lubes to help him move to the best of his ability. A little too well as you’ll have him turning head at record speed when you call him. Maybe even trip over his own feet trying to catch up to you. 

⋈ Billy can be a fool but he’s your fool. He loves and cherishes every day he gets to spend with you; And whenever he’s in a pinch, down in the hollows completing the hardest of commissions all for the sake of getting by with the Cunning Hares, he can only think of how you’ll be waiting for him on the outside. Ready to give him the biggest hug and rewatch Oh~ Sweetie where now he no longer finds joy in admiring the main actress as you shine brighter than any other starlight knight.

[writingquestionsanswered]

Every writing tip tells you to read a lot to write a lot, but I have been having a hard time reading after I started writing. Everything seems so predictable, you start a book and notice a hero's journey and boom you know exactly what the story is going to be, or after you learn how to foreshadow you get all the little references and know exactly what the thing is leading to. It just feels boring. Do you know any way to overcome this?

Trouble Reading After Writing

Honestly, that really is the one big drawback to being both a reader and a writer. Once you have a grasp on how to tell a story, flaws in others' stories are more apparent to you. And that's what's happening, unfortunately... if the hero's journey is that obvious, even to another writer, that's a flaw in the storytelling. If the foreshadowing references are that obvious to you, that's a flaw in the storytelling. Because top quality writing should generally pass muster even to other writers. And I say "generally" because it's all subjective anyway, so what seemed predictable to you may still not be predictable to another writer.

So, where you're at is where a lot of more experienced writers find themselves... the books you're going to enjoy will have to clear a higher bar, and sometimes it can take some time to find authors who meet your personal criteria... but you will. You may want to take advantage of e-book deals, library books, ARCs, and samples for a little while as you try to find books and authors that work for you. Because I'd say probably the number one key to this stage in your writing/reading relationship is to not be afraid to DNF. I used to really struggle with DNF-ing, so I would force myself to read the book and end up reading like a page a day if I was lucky. My personal rule is I give a book 3-5 chapters. If I absolutely hate it by the end of chapter three or so and it shows no promise or merit, I'll happily DNF. If it shows some promise or merit, I'll give it a couple more chapters to see how it goes. If I'm not invested enough to keep reading of my own volition, I'll DNF then.

But... keep at it, because you will find writers and books that work for you. Also: if you've read enough that you're to that point--where you understand storytelling so well that you can spot the flaws in others' stories--you're probably past the point where you need to be reading voraciously. Because the whole point of reading voraciously as a less experienced writer is to learn how stories work through firsthand experience. So, don't feel like you have to be inhaling books if you're past that point. Read what you want, when you want. A lot of writers don't read a lot while they're writing.

I hope that helps!

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

I’ve been writing seriously for over 30 years and love to share what I’ve learned. Have a writing question? My inbox is always open!

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[am-i-the-asshole-official]

WIBTA for calling out my friend's spending habits?

✈💸 to find later

I (NB 20s) have been struggling to find employment for a long time. I've been struggling a lot with money- I'm technically indebted to my bank due to an overdraft I dipped into during my last weeks of university while paying off surprise fees, and in the entire year since have been unsuccessful in paying it off for any meaningful length of time. The stress has been immense and I've been avoiding like the plague any kind of personal purchase or leisure activity that might cost me anything. It's a mindset that's been making me profoundly miserable and that I'll probably struggle to get out of for a long time.

However, in the past few weeks, I've managed to land what I can only describe as my dream job. It doesn't start for another couple months, and the pay won't be fantastic (it's an internship), but without a doubt it will change my life. Desperate to do something nice and give myself a break, members of my family agreed to lend me money via plane tickets to do a nice trip this summer and see my best friends abroad, my last big hurrah before entering the full-time workforce for the rest of my life (and being able to pay them back). And I've been really excited! I've been saving even harder than usual, scraping up cash and politely asking grandparents. It won't be easy to support myself in another country in my financial situation, I understand that, but I'm at a point where I think I can do it for a short time and not be a burden on the people who are hosting me.

However, the only issue comes with my friend (NB 20s). I've known them for years, we're extremely close, and we've been waiting for a chance to see each other again for most of that time not knowing if it would ever happen due to my financial situation, so this is the opportunity of a lifetime. They really want to host me, for at least 2 weeks, and do all these nice things together we've been planning. But in the past month or so they've all but drained hundreds of dollars from their bank account in art commissions and room decorations for themself, all of which they've been excitedly showing off to me and our other friends, all the while running out of money entirely. They can't pick up work from their (seasonal) job anymore, either, so there's no way for them to earn back the money now, and recently they've started having to push their commissions just to cover their student loan payment this month. In ordinary circumstances I wouldn't mind and would try and help them out, but I won't be in any financial position on the trip to cover their bills as well as my own (at least not regularly), and I feel like this would have been so preventable if they'd just... picked less wildly expensive things to buy as a treat, knowing the circumstances.

They've said they're also stressed and need to buy themselves nice things sometimes, which I totally agree with! I'm not that much of a party pooper, they are in a rough situation themself right now and the stuff they bought does make them genuinely happy. But it also sucks to watch them then have to struggle to pay for bills and necessities because of it, and I feel really selfish for thinking of it in the framework of our time together later as well. I've done my absolute best to be able to spend at least a few weeks having a great time with them not worrying and pinching pennies while taking care of myself, but now I'm worried we're just going to spend the trip with both of us stressed out of our minds and stuck at home struggling to pay for gas. I'm an anxious person, and the few times I've tried to bring up my worries in a more gentle way, they've vehemently reassured me everything will be fine, but now I'm leaving in just over a week and everything seems like it's getting worse instead of improving.

I know I should be just glad to spend time in their company, even if it is just at home, but I can't stop feeling like the way they've been spending money in the leadup to this has been really irresponsible and preventable. But even if so, it made them happy in the moment so i should be happy for them too, and surely it's just straight up none of my business? It's also not like they can take it back now- it's already happened, and they can't earn the money back if they wanted to. I feel like if i called them on it at this point it'd just be a dick move and come across pointless and jealous, but I also can't help but think it's unproductive to let this gnaw at me the entire time, like I should really be communicating this kind of upset and talk it out first in case it comes to a head and boils over and ruins our whole time together.

I'm aware I'll be long into the trip by the time this posts but it'd be nice to look back and see other perspectives.

[laurence-does-art]

While I have you here...

Hello! And fear not, for I am just a little guy trying to draw and not go insane in the current world climate.

No, but seriously, it's nice to meet you.

My name is Laurence, and pretty obviously, I do art!

I figured my Meet the Artist from this year would be a good way to introduce myself and what I do, but that's only a small snippet of stuff really. So, here is some fun info-

My name is Laurence, but I also go by:

- Lu

- Laur

- LDA

- L. (how I sign off my fanfics now)

Any of those - though I'm often just called Laurence - but I'm always open to new nicknames! (as long as they're appropriate)

I have one (1) dog, her name is Emery

I'm turning 22 on December 22nd

My pronouns are They/He

I have ADHD

I draw and write fanfiction most of the time, though you'll see me bounce between the two quite often because the ADHD beings demand my attention be split at all times

I'm in a couple of RP groups, so if you find my DeviantArt that's most what's going to be posted there (I'll also post some here but not often)

I am mainly a human artist but I've been dragged into cat hell, and thus, have also been learning to draw more feral and anthro characters as well!

My commissions are also open! If you're interested go ahead and shoot me a message here or on another platform!

I mainly choose to depict myself as a being with purple hair, pointy ears, and blue and yellow eyes! Though I also am partial to using my fursona, which is a bilby!

(If you draw me, I prefer you use the above and not how I actually look/drew my IRL self as <33)

I am an adult, which means sometimes, I may draw adult content. I DO NOT want minors to interact with that content. All pieces that need avoided will be marked with 18+ or SUGGESTIVE CONTENT. If I am made aware that you are a minor and you are interacting with content of mine of the more spicy variety, then I'm sorry but I will be taking precautions.

Aside from that, I'm pretty chill usually, so, lets just chill together.

Grab your notebooks, sketchbooks, a drink and a snack, and settle on down!

Here's a list of my current projects:

in no particular order

Praise, Devotion, and Worship (fanfiction)

Maelstrom (comic)

Necrophobia (comic)(put on hold)

A Demon's Guide for Surviving School (comic)

Tenants of Apartment 213 (story/comic)

The Aftermath (fanfiction)

Sector 2 (story)

Alright, I think that's enough out of me for now.

I'll probably be posting some things that I've worked on over the past year throughout the night, so stay tuned! Thank you all! Bye!

-LDA, 2024

[heymrspatel]

ART TAG

thanks for tagging me @deathclassic @kiennilove @suzy-queued @doshiart and @sgtmickeyslaughter 🥰💙

Have you always been interested in creating art? i have, yea! i've been drawing for as long as i can remember!

What's your favourite medium to use? If digital, what programs do you like? right now i would say digital since it's what i use the most nowadays. i use procreate on an ipad that is about to give out on me (and i really really need it to NOT do that).

Do you create outside of fandom? yea, i make silly little sketches for myself almost daily. just to stay sane while i work a corporate 9-5. those will never see the light of day.

Share something you haven't finished and/or never got around to posting this is like 90% done... but i never posted it because i didn't feel good with it at the time lol like something was off and i felt like i would have to undo too much to get it where i wanted it to be... (does this make sense?)

Favourite piece you've made? this is hard! i feel like it changes all the time? i'm going to go with this one because i really like how the background turned out and because i'm a soft bitch

Draw your icon in a minute or less hehe his cheeks

An underrated piece you've made in your opinion 'baby boy' idk i think it's really soft and lovely

but also, a lot of the kinktober pieces… i’ve been so so so very proud of them because they’re so vulnerable and i think i did a nice job with some of them, but they don’t quite take off 😅

Do you do art in a professional setting? i do not. my work is the furthest thing i could get from being creative.

A piece you don't like but did really well on social media uuuhhh i think i'll skip this one! simply because i could pick apart probably everything i've ever posted lol!

Post an old piece and compare it to your most recent, what are the similarites? i'm not going to do my most recent because it's kinktober and i also went for a pretty different style... SO! i'll do the first comic style one i did and the latest one!

the color palette is still the same, they're still very soft and gone for each other, i really love a gentle face hold!

Have you ever collaborated with another artist/s? i don't think i have? but i've collaborated with a couple of writers to make some pieces for their fics!

What piece has the most notes? Are you surprised? roadtrip boys! i'm not really surprised, not for nothing but i did my thing here. there's lots of details, storytelling, dreamy colors. i get it.

Who/What is your favourite subject matter? tbh it's landscapes or mundane still lifes...lol!! "julissa, not bowls of fruit!", everyone cried! you'd be correct. not that. but everyday kind of humdrum but meaningful pieces. atmospheric. yanking you back to a point in time. - i did a drawing of my grandma's vanity once. with her lipsticks and little lotions and stuff. like that.

Show us something not from fandom you've made here go:

Where do you like to create? on my couch. absolutely hunched over like a shrimp.

Do you have a tag that you use to group your creations? Tell us so people can follow it i do! i put everything under myart

Give yourself a shoutout, where can we commission/buy/follow you for more pieces? i don't do commissions or have anything for sale and i also don't exist anywhere else lamdsflj i'm just here and i crosspost on ao3 💙

i'll tag @deedala @michellemisfit @gallapiech @lingy910y @vintagelacerosette @gallawitchxx @spookygingerr @romidoes if you'd like to play! if not, this is just me giving you a little nose boop!

[thejockout]

Hey, all; little heads up on some possible changes to my Patreon tiers.

TL;DR: Following an unexpected increase in my file output, I am considering releasing more files per month and adding additional tiers users can pay to access these bonus files. My current provision of two files a month for $5 will not change, but you will now be optionally able to pay more for more content. That's basically all I'm saying here, but you can continue reading for the context if you'd like it.

Hey everyone. Just want to post to mention something that may be happening in the next couple of weeks... but I want to clarify something first.

I originally started this recent Patreon push with the intent of giving 2 monthly releases (one a fortnight), and my current tiers are priced according to that rate. Pending any kind of changes Patreon makes on the back end, I always want to keep my base entry tier at roughly 5 dollars/2 files a month... for as long as it is reasonable for me to keep that rate, like for example unless Patreon start to take a big chunk out of it or something. Theeen maybe I'd increase it by a dollar or two.

However, if I should happen to produce more files I want to release per month, I will probably make higher priced tiers to justify the increased time spend and output. Meaning that 5 dollars would no longer get you "all content", but my staple 2 files per month.

I got this idea from conversations with several other Patreon tists over the last few weeks... While I have been in the shoes of a subject who doesn't want to have to pay lots of money per month just to keep up with regular releases, Jockout (Patreon and commissions) is also my sole income source right now. It is, effectively, my job. So if I suddenly hit this ambitious goal of doubling my old output, I think it's reasonable that I would make more tiers charging more for access to this bonus content.

There would be no pressure on current subscribers to pay more if they don't want to - as a discerning customer, it would be up to you to decide if and when you're able to afford it, like maybe waiting to see if one of these bonus files is up your alley before paying for an upgrade. I don't plan to sabotage my two staple monthly releases by putting out garbage, it's all going to get the same amount of time and quality. But, as I'm starting to take this more seriously and treat it as a bit more of a business than something I want to put time into idly when the mood strikes, I need to treat it like one on the back end too. if it seems like I'm being overly defensive here, it's because I'm hesitant of coming across hostile or money-grabbing.

What has sparked all this is that I am currently in the midst of a very ambitious push to complete all of my 2024 scripting in the next week, including writing enough scripts that I will be able to put out one file a week for the remainder of the year...

Of course, as mentioned previously, I also think I'm going to consider bonus incentives for the highest tiers in the form of 30-day-challenges or maybe even personalised help with hypnotic programming (file calendars, etc.) if desired... a Discord is the most common bonus incentive but I'm not sure about using it as one, the market is kind of saturated in terms of hypnotist discords. And anyway, that's all for later down the road.

Hope you understand, and hope you look forward to what I've got coming. I'll update with specifics on this tier stuff as I come up with concrete ideas for what I'm offering/for how much.

[staringdownabarrel]

Let me preface this by saying I don't know if I'm actually going to go through with this because I haven't written fan fiction since I was in my early teens, and if I do I don't know if I'll post it because I don't know if I'll be happy with it. (Despite my One Gimmick being that I'm a ranting, raving lunatic, I actually am very self conscious about my writing. I'm okay with posting in this format because basically every longer text post I post is a first draft with minimal proofreading, and that makes things easier for me for some reason.)

Anyway, I have an idea for a Star Trek fan fic, post-DS9 in the late 24th century/early 25th kind of period--so basically more or less overlapping with Picard. When I say idea, I really just mean I have a vague concept of what the cast would look like.

The captain would be someone who'd previously been on a deep space mission on a Galaxy-class ship. Apparently they're built for twenty year missions, so they will have entirely missed the Dominion War, and will more or less be the kind of Starfleet True Believer that the TNG crew were for the most part.

The XO will be someone who saw some pretty extensive service during the Dominion War. They'd still be a true believer because they remember Starfleet as it was before the war, but they're still sorta balancing that with the more militarised reality they saw after it.

The chief of security would sorta be like Nog in the sense that he was drummed out of the Academy a couple of years early because Starfleet needed some warm bodies on deck. Everyone sorta expects them to go into Edgy McEdgelord territory, and sometimes they do teeter on the edge of it, but they usually swing back around to being the most unironically enthusiastic about Federation ethics.

The chief medical officer was commissioned just after the war wrapped up.

The chief engineer was on Voyager, so they also missed the war, but probably have stronger opinions about it because of having served with the Maquis for seven years. (They may actually be a former Maquis, but I'm not 100% on this point yet. It depends on whether or not I think I could do something interesting with that angle.)

The helmsperson and the chief science officer or the chief of operations, depending on which one I go with, would both have entered and graduated the Academy well after the Dominion War. So while they both believe in the Federation, they're also working with a murkier sense of Starfleet ethics and are sorta going through culture shock when they realise the rest of the senior staff have unbridled enthusiasm about the propaganda posters.

So this cast would more or less allow for a Rule of Twos--two who missed the Dominion War due to being otherwise indisposed, two who were veterans of it, two who graduated straight after, and two who were in the Academy for part or all of it (chief of security would have at least done some training during the war), two who came much later. That'd allow for a full spread of ideas of what Starfleet means, what its issues are, etc.

The main thrust of the actual story would be something Zalkonian related. That'd make sense because that'd still be a legacy race that allows for a lot of storylines that'd still largely fit with canon, but also allow a lot of room so people couldn't get too mad that it didn't quite match their interpretation because they were only in one episode.

I think it'd be sorta cool to take a character like John Doe who was in the early stages of the ascent to non-corporeal status but also explicitly asked for political asylum. Another idea I'm considering is maybe there's a breakaway colony who's asking for Federation membership, or a potential defector trying to cross over, similar to Jarok from TNG's The Defector.

Again, I don't know if I'm actually going to go through with writing this or not. Even if I do, I don't know if I'll ever post it online anywhere. It's sorta in that early stage of being a thought whose stars I haven't formed into constellations yet.

[t1meslayer]

Busy with important family events over the next couple of days, and so I thought it would be good to get a day-and-date release for this Debrief on the latest entry in my Sapphic Valley series, "How You Get The Girl." Be sure to read the story before jumping in!

Did you do it? Did you read the story?

Alright, I'm trusting you. Go ahead and hit that 'Keep Reading' button you scamp.

It only seems appropriate to start this Debrief off by addressing the elephant in the room. I haven't posted anything in over a month, and "By Moonlight" came about a month after its predecessor, the conclusion to "Stone-Cold Lovers."

Work, naturally, has been a major factor.

You can see me talk about that almost two weeks ago in this Tumblr post I made about writing in a coffee shop, which came weeks after I actually started writing during a trip to a friend's house.

===

Side note:

Just wanted to take a moment and acknowledge my beautiful Haley and Emily keychains. My friend who's responsible for the affairs of one ghostly farmer named Jizzabelle (Gisabelle to the laymen) got them for me! Only appropriate after I commissioned some art of her and Abigail.

Emily was my first Stardew wife, and Haley currently holds the biggest place in my heart. They make a lovely duo!

And I'll avoid any sister-wife jokes

===

While I've had some other projects like Zine writing to take care of, work and life can't explain the full absence.

The best way I can think to explain things is that:

I had the general writer's block, and

Despite the best intentions and advice of my irl friends and online pals like @alchemicallymoon and @duelbraids, I couldn't force myself to "break" that block by just... Writing something else.

This is entirely the result of my own psychosis. I have a tendency to carefully plot things out and impose a timetable that really doesn't need to exist. When I feel the cause is righteous enough, it's hard to get around that. In this case, I knew I needed to get my poll-winning idea out after dawdling for holidays like Valentine's Day, and then I knew I only wanted to post one more story before jumping on a very special event for my upcoming 30th AO3 post.

Thus, here we are: arbitrarily forcing myself into a spiral of writer's block misery because of a silly promise on Tumblr and my own sense of ordered chaos.

At the very least, this meant it's coming out not long after my AO3 pal InsertACatchyPennameHere also emerged from the woodwork to tell me they're working on something INSPIRED by my four-person friend group farm adaptations.

Much love to them, wherever they may be.

I'll probably start writing more eclectically now that my shoulders are unweighed, but don't expect my next publication to hit until I'm finished working on teasing the big event. All you Pokemon fans better get hype!

And oh how sweet this publication feels. Between my great set of recent ceramics, the figure drawing class I've been attending, and creative writing, I've felt more fulfilled than ever.

You're here to talk about Stardew, though. So let us talk.

This idea began less with any one event as it did a desire to advance the Alexis/Haley relationship, and Haley's characterization in particular. It was always going to end with watercolor painting reference, but 2 Willow Lane was what I really wanted to dig into.

As I see it, a lot of what keeps people invested in Stardew when its comfy vibes becoming routine is the air of mystery in Eric Barone's worldbuilding. Haley and Emily's parents being some world-traveling duo who left their home in the siblings' care for who knows how long (and who knows how many times over their lifetime) really piqued my interest. So much so that the new writing challenge I set for myself in "How You Get The Girl" was crafting a particularly long set of descriptions that emphasize how overwhelming the parents' influence feels — without creating an impenetrable wall of text.

Hopefully I succeeded in that. Let me know!

I tried to include some vaguely real world-adjacent references into that description of the house, as happens with the magical-realism world of Stardew Valley. For example:

The computer sitting next to their bonsai tree is an iMac G3, the kind of old 'futuristic' tech that my dad loves!

A Speedwell refrigerator is based on even more vintage tech, the Mayflower fridge, but named after a different ship ridden by Pilgrims coming to America.

That city that the family visited in an old photograph with a "monument of arching, interlocking steel" is, of course, Paris — with the statue bookends referencing any number of statues in the Louvre.

Haley's FAD magazine could be referencing any number of publications, but Vogue is probably the closest analogue to what I imagine her reading.

Furthermore, I took some notes on describing the home's layout off of my sister's apartment building, and I asked my bestie @trybard for input on what kind of hanging plant should be used in the transitional hallway. Hanging pothos, philodendron, and spider plants were the three options provided, and my response was appropriate:

They know so much about plants.

Go bug them about it.

I drew on other friends' knowledge to help decorate the house. Specifically, I asked one of my witchiest friends what kinds of protective wards someone like Emily would leave around doorways and windows. She had... A lot of reference material.

I picked Hazel given it purportedly "protects against evil; encourages abundance and inspiration." I also picked Amethyst as one of Emily's loved gifts, one that purportedly "absorbs negative energy, promotes harmony."

My witchy friend is the same one who provided the TikTok that I referenced in my advertisement post:

Perhaps the most important thing about 2 Willow Lane was the recurring motif of Barbie's Dream House.

As a surface-level reference, I think the groundwork is clear. Blondie's love of fashion and general queen bee demeanor fits comparisons to Barbie well, and she lives in a big ol' house full of stuff. We all saw Greta Gerwig's Barbie movie last year. It's still in the cultural zeitgeist.

I'm hip with the kids.

Yet, early on I also tried to make it clear that if this is a "dream" house, it's neither Haley's nor Emily's dream. Haley is a Barbie in that stereotypical sense, but also there's much to be mined from the analogy of a sort of powerless doll in an immutable house, constrained by social obligation to her family rather than literal plastic and stickers.

The cold open of Jodi and Sam was meant to stand alone, but in execution I also think drawing Kent's absence into the conversation makes for a more thematically rich comparison to these sisters who appear to have themselves more put together.

My beta reader said this wound up being one of my stronger stories because of how all of that intertwined, which I appreciated given how down on myself I was following the whole writer's block thing.

But also.

Also.

Alexis gets to be horny. She's hitting on lonely MILFs and watching girls shake their asses to the tune of bad reality TV.

We love a buff dommy mommy farm girl in this house.

Haley is probably horny too, she just doesn't realize it yet. For now I think it's fun enough to play into her being coy about building excuses for Alexis to come over, and then getting incensed when Emily barges in on their private time meant to learn more about this farm girl she just can't get out of her head.

===

Fun fact:

Every story in this series is named after a Taylor Swift song, but I know next-to nothing about her discography. All of them are suggestions by my friend whose house I was at when starting this story — the same one who controls Gardenia on the farm.

While I went with "How You Get The Girl," her alternative suggestion was "The Man."

===

All that w|w talk aside, I also want to give Sam the loveable idiot a shoutout. Had to do a fair bit of research into how skateboards are constructed for his failed ollie, and I slipped in a reference to shitty old technology that's exclusively for my beta reader to enjoy.

I also tried doing some agricultural research to figure out how the folks at Kevin Farm could have grown cucumbers so there'd be a jar of legitimate pickles... But that was getting too in the weeds.

Insert laugh track here

Decided to just go with pickled artichoke hearts to save everyone a lot of trouble.

And where does "Kevin Farm" come from, you may be asking yourself. Or the fabulous "Kevin's Special" with its definitely not innuendo tagline.

That story will have to wait for another day, my friends.

[seb-reads31]

YO BRO!! PLEASE SAY ALL OF YOUR ASTER HCS RIGHT NOW. RIGHT. NOW!!!!!!

I'll give you one of mine :> I imagine he is a bit buffer and is a bit taller than the y/n [ I imagine hes like 5,8-5-9? ] but is still hella scared of them even though they should be more scared of him LOL

LOVE YOU BRO!!! -amer:]

Tw's -

Genre -

Type - head canons/drabble

Comments - I don't have many unless if I'm like, playing/doing something and I get the random thought "aster would like/love/hate this" so I need like, prompts to get the creative juices 😗

Random Thoughts

😰 This man is a little short in my head.

😰 Not like, SUPER short but a couple of inches below the average for guys

😰 I'm in LOVE with the idea that he's buff, I'm downbad for that thought 😍😍

😰 B U T, HEAR ME OUT ON THIS

😰 He's sort of like, petite before the incident, then after he decides to take some self defense classes and he does a bit of weight lifting 👀👀👀

😰 Not enough to like, have a bunch of muscle but enough to see it through his normal sweater, giving him the element of surprise✨

😰 He honestly... Probably hates soup after the incident. If you know you know 😭

😰 H E A R M E O U T A G A I N

😰 Aster opens a flower shop a little while after the incident 👀👀

😰 CAUSE LIKE, PRETTY BOY WITH A PRETTY FLOWER CROWN????

😰 Listen to this

😰 Say the person is completely separate from (y/n) (which is your/name if you didn't already know) and Y/N meets Aster in his shop one day 👀

😰 Adorable friendship for a good while, right? Then (referencing my "aster finds love again" head canons) after a few solid years of being friends, maybe he hires you during that time to like, deliver people's commissioned bouquets, and he like, confesses his love to (y/n) using a bouquet of flowers he made with how he thinks of them cause you're bound to know SOMETHING about what the flowers mean for as long as you spend in his shop 🤧🤧

😰 you should totally like... Draw Aster with a flower crown....

😰 I'm in love with that idea now 😭😭

😰 That, or he becomes a teacher

😰 Don't ask how that idea popped into mind

😰 BUT HEAR ME OUT AGAIN-

😰 There may or may not be a few more of those

😰 S O, again, you are separate from the person from the incident, B U T, you have a small child from a previous relationship or it's a W A Y younger sibling. You pick but I'm just gonna call them "your child"

😰 And I'm thinking he's either a preschool teacher or an elementary teacher but we're gonna go with preschool for my sake 😭

😰 But one day you go to pick up your child during naptime for the bigger kids (cause I said so) and when you talk to the secretary person they just say to go ahead and find your child

😰 Don't @ me I don't know how this works 😭

😰 And when you go to find your child you can see Aster comforting them after they had a bad dream, he sings them a small little song to keep their mind off of the dream (something like Little Bird, Little Bird cause it's interactive or something else idk) and he offers to read a story to them so they can try and fall back asleep, maybe even offers a small snack or something beforehand

😰 Whatever they choose, in the middle of the snack/book/song they end up catching a glimpse of you as you hide in a hallway basically giving Aster the goo goo eyes 🥺🥺

😰 You jump as your child runs very quietly towards you, basically outing you for staring at their teacher (not that I can blame you, I'd stare too 🤧) and you flush a bright red in the dark room.

😰 Aster gets a little shy at the thought someone other than the children heard him sing so he also flushes and starts fidgeting with his hands, asking what you needed in a small voice.

😰 You explain to the best of your ability without stuttering or accidentally saying something embarrassing that you needed to take your child because you wouldn't be back the normal time to pick them up and didn't have anyone else to watch them.

😰 Aster calms himself down as you speak, and says that the child is fine and goes to grab their little bag they bring every day

😰 When Aster comes closer to you, you can't help but admire his face, it was slightly round, his eyes soft and gentle, his slightly chubby cheeks make you want to pinch them, and finally, his plush lips as he spoke, his words going through 1 ear and out the other....

😰 You flinch as you catch yourself thinking about.. KISSING the gorgeous man??! Ohhh boy, you were starting to fall for the man, and you just met him today!!

😰 You finally clue in to what Aster was saying just in time to get enough context clues to give him a small and quick reply before you quickly speed walk out of the preschool...

😰 The rest is for another time 🤭🤭

Notes - D U D E, THIS WAS SO FUN TEODBIDDBISBEIE, THINKING ABOUT ASTER'S OCCUPATION AFTERWARDS WAS LIKE, A LITTLE BIT TOUGH BUT THEY'RE SO SWEET FKDNFJDB I hope you enjoyed Amer 🤧🤧🤧

[love-toxin]

so this is dumb but one day I’m hoping to start doing writing commissions, but I don’t have an clue where to start? Do you have any advice on like, pricing for word length, or how many slots I should open to start with, etc? sorry for bother you! ;-;

not at all!! it's a good question--ill give you a longer answer down here! ⬇️

so the base rate that a lot of independent writers charge is about 1$ per 100 words, but it really depends on the quality of your writing, if you have an editor (or edit yourself) and how long it might take you to write. i would suggest practicing writing longer pieces and get a gauge on how much time it takes you to write 500, 1000, 2000, etc so you can give an accurate estimate of how long the commission will take, too. i would only open a couple slots to begin with so you don't get overwhelmed, but once you've got good time management with writing your pieces you can probably open more if you want to! and of course, you can increase or decrease the overall price based on the content--like i usually charge another dollar or two for writing someone's oc because it takes extra time for me to research them and go through their character sheets, or I'll do the same if the commissioner wants nsfw or something that's very complicated that will take more time than an average piece.

I'll also say that keeping guidelines is really important! not just for you but for your commissioners to know exactly what they're getting by coming to you. if you don't want to write certain topics or you're only comfortable with particular content, make sure you state it clearly wherever you post your commission sheet or make an entirely separate document and link it to your original post. i haven't personally done commissions in a long while because i just kept getting an influx of emails from people who wanted me to write things i was so not comfortable with, and that's happened when i have specified what i won't do, so be sure to protect yourself and don't be afraid to block people who try to cross those boundaries. or just block creeps in general bc I can't tell you how many people I've encountered who think I'll write whatever they want if they offer me enough money. obviously that's not to scare you but it's certainly something that won't hurt to prepare for if it ever does happen.

aside from that and on a lighter note, try not to stress yourself out too much over it all. figure out what you can do comfortably and adhere to that, if you make mistakes or need more time to finish a piece, just be honest with the person you're working with and 99% of the time they'll be understanding. if you don't want to write something somebody asks for then politely decline, or block their contact if they harass you or ask for something wildly inappropriate. and it doesn't hurt to ask for more details! if you need some more guidance or inspiration on a piece most commissioners will be more than happy to talk further about their idea.

i hope this helps, and i hope you have fun with it! <3

[twistedtummies2]

Got any Halloween story ideas brewing that you're willing to share?

So...I actually had a plan for a Halloween Special this year. UNFORTUNATELY, I don't think I'll be able to get it done in time, because right now my primary focus is finishing up commissions. I may or may not write it up as a belated Halloween special, or just save it for a different occasion. Either way, comms have to come first. HOWEVER...since I probably won't get it done in time, I WILL tell you all what the concept for the story IS. Because I think a lot of you will enjoy it. :) The story will be non-kink-based. It is to be the first (and hopefully not the last) for a new AU I've had in mind for a while: I call it "The Dragon's Masque." It's a Phantom-of-the-Opera-themed AU, with Malleus as the Phantom, a Female!MC in the Christine role, and Ace and Deuce pulling double duty as a couple of Raoul surrogates. There are other characters I plan to pull into this universe in various roles, if I write more, such as Ruggie and the Pomefiore trio (especially Epel), for a start. However, they won't be featured in the first story. The concept was inspired by SEVERAL pieces of fanart I've seen floating around with Malleus as the Phantom: I loved the idea so much, I thought creating an AU around the idea would be fun. I'm pulling inspiration largely from the Andrew Lloyd Webber musical, but I also am taking cues from some other adaptations of the book, including the 1943 film with Claude Rains, the 1990 Miniseries with Charles Dance, and the Hammer Horror version with Herbert Lom. Whenever the story gets done, I hope you'll all like it. Like...every other idea I still need to work on. XD

[zhongrin]

Cofhdjsbsndkodndn Rin omfg you're indulging me with it too much, I'll faint one day frfr (but you shall receive the Zhongli bot from me as a make up hehe)

Lucifer and Diavolo huh? *Taking notes*

Plssss yes it's the beginning of it - I can't tell ya more cuz I can't remember it anymore, it's so long ago sihdjeosjsjs

Imo drunk Zhongli - maybe his Dragon instincts are getting more dominant (like he does) but also he is getting quite.. possessive even? Idk lmao 😭

And drunk Alhaitham 100% affectionate and clingy hehe <33

Drunk Baizhu? Damn this guy seems like the type who never drinks alcohol but if he is drunk idk, maybe he gets very very clingy and is brabbling everything he is thinking rn? Idk fksbsjsknwks

FobskODBSJSISBSN RIN *faints again*

Rin now you're acting sus 🤨 (I wanna see it ngl hehe)

IKR?? IT SEEMS LIKE THEM SO MUCH!

And help not the Alhaitham bot being a menace 😭 (sorry I taught him that /j)

I mean then it's alright, but I will choose Baizhu over anyone <33

Rin 🤨 acting sus again

HELP MATCHING JEWELRY THATS SO CUTE I CANT-;; FJEBSIHEVWIWIS

Didbhsksjsjjsb omfgggg Rinnnnn (that's so cool!!❤️)

Also, with thus matching jewelry ya always have a part of your hubby's with you <33 💞💞 it's so cute I can't omfg

Do your hubby's also have something from you, except your heart? <33

Mm random Baivi HCs? (I'm bad at this ofmg 😭)

A part of our mornings is that I brush Baizhus hair (and try to braid it but I fail omfg) like, he sits on the bed and I sit behind him. And while at it we are talking about everything like our plans for today or something like that <33

Ya have more headcanons for your selfships? <33

gotta get you that daily dose of baizhu now <3 (fr you and jojo will be the death of me hsldjflskjdf)

pls diavolo is such king energy but also himbo energy and it's so fascinating lmao

head empty only genshin these days.... 😌

that's cute omg clingy and possessive drunk dragon li. might scratch you if you come too close. his horns or tail probably pops out too 😭

affectionate drunk haitham will be my undoing. pls if he giggles when i kiss him all over his blushy face i'll cry

drunk baizhu clinging to you and has 0 filter. tells you he loves you and calls you with 7423804 nicknames. infodumps you on the properties of crystalflies and glaze lilies. very wholesome. hmmmm. better take a good hold of his arm so he doesn't stumble around....

oh no vi!!! BAIZHU WHERE ARE YOU COME GET YOUR WIFE SHE NEEDS MOUTH TO MOUTH RESUSCITATION

......... you asked for it-

cw. very suggestive lord rex lapis forgive me for i have sinned-

SO IT WAS YOU HSLDKJFKLSDJF don't keep teaching him to rival my chaotic nature 🙏🏻

mhm mhm i see *notes onto baivi clipboard*

i love matching couple things, it's just so sjldfkskjljdlfks you always have a piece of them with you and you know they have a piece of you with them and it's so aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

Do your hubby's also have something from you, except your heart? <33

my soul and mortal vessel and all my possessions /shot

zhongli has a lil teapot set i commissioned someone to make before and al haitham uses a special bookmark that i gave him <3

awwwwwww omg braiding your man's hair is such a hsldjfksd experience fr fr does baizhu and you use hair oil or the like? does baizhu play with your hair too?

let's see... what else.... hold on let me cheat a bit *googles selfship questions*

zhongli can also brew coffee now because i like my coffees in the morning/afternoon and teas at night! he still doesn't like drinking them tho and if i make coffee fro myself at night he will scold me because he knows i'll be zooming about until like. 3-4am. oops.

al haitham almost always wakes up first in the morning (morning workout king probably) and falls asleep last at night (he's reading and i'm just curling up beside him).

now, baivi - who wakes up first? what does baizhu do when he first wake up? if he wakes you up, how does he do it? and when you both wake up, who usually cooks breakfast? ;)

[keefwho]

November 13 - 2023 Monday

10:52pm

When I woke up I decided I was tired of my forming beard so I shaved it off. It felt good and had been around long enough to look weird with it gone. Before I shaved it completely, I gave myself a caterpillar stache which looked funny and also like something I could rock when I get older. In the shower when I was gonna use my close shaver, it wasn't charged so I had to wait for my second shower after my workout to get baby smooth. Breakfast was corned beef hash, an egg, 2 pieces of toast, and half a serving of cereal. It was a big breakfast to account for my workout later. In stream I only did a couple warmup sketches and committed to refining one picture because I didn't feel like being too imaginative this morning. I finished Blink's commission which turned out okay but he had a lot of (valid) fixes to be made so I had to go back to it a few times. Honestly I'm just annoyed at characters with needlessly complicated designs. Especially when they are generically "tribal". Like what are these even supposed to mean? AND I have to draw them all perfectly? After that was finished I worked more on the next YCH. Today's Mia episode dropped some important lore and today's He Man was amazing. It's the season 1 finale which I've never seen and it went hard. After stream I started my workout. 50 lunges, 40 situps, and a 2 mile power-walk/jog. It doesn't seem like much compared to 45 minutes of wood splitting so maybe I'll up the intensity. The problem is the time it takes because I almost never get the workout and cleaning done before lunch like I plan as it is. I meant to clean before lunch today but I only had time to shower. Lunch also made me late because it took a long time to cook. I made my custom stir fry. I felt confident during today's request but it didn't actually turn out as well as I wanted and it took longer than usual. Today's project was to sketch an art trade for someone but I really had to force myself to do it. At one point I took a small break to close my eyes and listen to a stream until I felt more up to the task. Daisy also wanted to JD which was the break I really needed. We were pretty in sync today for a few of the songs and that was cute. After dancing I got back to sketching and did everything I was supposed to do. Afterwards I tried decompressing with a stream but I didn't want to watch to be honest. I didn't know what I wanted though. I probably should have found something else to do. It didn't take long for Daisy to become free and we watched an episode of She Ra while she filled out a therapy questionnaire and job application. Then I played Mother 3 and beat it for her finally. The ending was nothing like how I expected but it was still good. I have lots of things to think about before I determine what I personally think happened to everyone. In bed I played Star Stable and we talked about what we want to do with our lives and how lost we are. I am confident we will both find our way though. The best thing is we'll do it together.

[soliloquyepistolary]

What’s the next step to take us closer to the recall?

In the dream, there were some rats in the deep freezer that we have in the garage that were in suspended animation, a couple of them. And I think my dad was keeping them there for some reason and I wanted to set them free even though I found them absolutely disgusting. They were in plastic takeaway food containers and I drove some kms away like to some sort of sports stadium, where there was a lot of people around about to attend some kind of event like a game or something or maybe it was near commission housing somewhere in the city and I set it loose and it scurried away immediately, lightning fast. That one was the biggest one and then the other tub had a few smaller ones that I set free too. I felt a lot of disgust but I just knew I had to do the right thing and I didn’t want to set them free near the house in case they just came back resettle where they were and wrecked havoc too close to home I knew I had to release them a little while away.

This next dream I originally forgot but it was replayed again to me There were three doors, just three on doors that seemed to float in empty white space. The first felt like it was the most 'protective' with the security door locked as well the main door itself. There was no one there but I stood at the door pondering something. The other two doors felt more transparent or something the next one in the row didn’t have a security door and I’m not sure about the last one, I just now that progressive as you go along the next door felt 'lighter'.

What am I going over to his house for?

In the dream, I was sitting next to AL on white chairs and I just knew she was not okay like she was sad about something but at the same time she was trying to hide it so I touched her arm affectionately, stroking it tenderly as if to soothe her and she started crying and I really felt for her. It’s as if she just needed someone to feel that she was not okay and give her space to feel her emotions. I let her cry without saying a word, I was just there for her. It was unspoken communication.

I was looking out the window and I saw that there was an island that was hovering in the sky off in the landscape in what looked like a idealistic rendition of nature. The island looked like it was like a huge piece of earth that had been ripped out of it and was now floating in the sky. There was lush green growth upon it. It didn’t feel like earth, it honestly felt like a scene from a video game in the way that it was too perfect. It looked slightly out of focus or something. I was looking out of a window from a regular room too, probably my room but I was looking out into a scene that didn’t feel real. It was definitely beautiful, the sky was blue and bright but I felt no energy, it was devoid of any feeling. There was nothing coming from this reality, it's as if I was looking out into a painting or still image. When I realised this, I knew that I must be dreaming because the scene I was looking at was just too fake.

There was a washing machine in my room under the desk but it wasn’t connected. I knew that it used to work and I used to use it regularly but not anymore. I was looking at the back of the machine, trying to make sense of all the tangle of cords back there, trying to plug it back in. But I also kept thinking about how much water would drop on the floor from transporting the laundry from the machine to hang it outside and I realised I didn't really want to use it anyway. I'll just used the other one I've been using in the laundry room.

7/5 Yesterday I asked what the next step toward the recall was and I received that rat dream but what does it mean? Please make it very clear

A football game, choosing your team and sticking with it