#but also Life
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sometimes it feels like I create all this warmth and love and energy that then I can’t access because I have Good Boundaries and also Intense Fear and Anxiety and tbh it is the most devastating feeling in the entire world sometimes
#this is about teaching#but also life#like. I inspire a lot of love#but then I don’t know what to do with it or how to receive it and so I just try to be very appropriate and then I leave#and my heart just SHATTERS#I don’t even know how to articulate this but it is one of the deep under the surface things that has been killing me lately#like. It makes me want to weep#and idk what to do about it!!!!!!!#we have reached the part of spring break where I start to unravel sorry
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You say "it doesn't matter, ultimately it's not a big deal!" enough to try and justify not getting big feelings over something you care about, until it's suddenly "it doesn't matter. Ultimately it is not a big deal. Why am I even here. Why am I doing this. What's the point of it, it doesn't matter. I'm going home to stare at the ceiling."
#this is in regards to lure coursing#purebred dogs#and dogs in general#but also life#you know.#i thought birds healed me but they didnt.
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sorry in advance for everyone who gave their picrew a thick jacket you're all north people now
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God's sins are unforgivable.
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If life is a never ending loop of dirty dishes and laundry then that means life is a never ending loop of home cooked meals and comfy clean clothes
#and i live by that#life is just life#ok ren go to bed ‼️#life is a constant loop of worry but also a constant loop of support#a constant loop of love and connections#thats what it is to be alive#omg period cramp ok good night#ren won't shut up#mood ruined ouchie
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it's extremely critical that you see the photo of the perp walk for luigi mangione as being propaganda. i've seen so many people wave it off and instead fawn over his looks. and trust me, i know it ended up being kind of pathetic and weird - but please don't brush it off as a "modelling opportunity" for him. it's a fucking terrifying message the police are sending.
i want to make a few comparisons here, in case you're not from the US or familiar with why the perp walk thing is something to pay attention to. just to set the groundwork for why this is a purposeful, unusual, and cruel act by the nyc police - for why this is not a common occurrence and for why that matters.
the prosecution alleges the show of force is due to the charge of "terrorism." for comparison, in june 2015, tsarnaev was found guilty for the boston marathon bombing, which killed 3 people and injured hundreds. his actions are considered to be an act of domestic terrorism. i have spent the last hour looking through google for pictures of similar to mangione's perp walk - and so far, i have found zero. i also just do not personally remember a moment like that, despite living in boston at the time.
they allege that luigi is a stone-cold killer who carried out a longterm plan, making him particularly dangerous. again for comparison: in nyc, recently cory martin was found guilty of the killing of brandy odom. the murder was planned and premeditated to steal insurance money. and yet no staged perp walk. why didn't her life matter enough for a "show of force"?
but mangione gets paraded by a veritable army of police officers as if he is a rabid animal. for a single citizen who allegedly killed one other single citizen, the "largest perp walk ever" occurs.
so what is the "strong message" that the mayor and the police were trying to send here? the mayor speaks as if mangione is already convicted of terrorism. there is a very thin number of people who feel threatened by the CEO's death. none of us felt like mangione needs to be under massive armed guard.
the message is that you shouldn't resist. they are trying to "make an example" of him - that if you behave badly and kill a single rich person, you'll be treated as if you killed hundreds of people. you will be treated worse than a man who was found guilty of terrorism. you will be considered guilty without trial. the message is that the rich are a protected class, and you cannot touch them without massive punishment. they are trying to prevent a revolution by showing dominance and force against you.
the message is that the police are a puppet of the wealthy and that the law is not equally applied across class disparity. it is "some are more equal than others." it is "one life is more precious than another."
the show of force wasn't for luigi. it was for us. it was a warning. they are trying to remind us who is really in control.
#i bring up tsarnev only bc i feel like people DID want blood. i lived in boston. people wanted to rip him apart.#i do not personally remember a moment where he was paraded around like that. and the fact we gave more dignity to him#than luigi .... is startling.#and i just realized last night i was like - i don't really remember a perp walk like that. maybe im misremembering#but i went to google and i was like. wait why the fuck was it so fucking big.#it WASNT a random act of terror. it WASNT to injure/kill as many as possible.#even if we consider it to be premeditated murder: when have we ever done this.#so brandy's life didnt deserve “a show of force?”#the mayor doesn't say ''our city wont stand for this'' when it's a planned murder for insurance money????#anyway . ur not immune etc etc etc#but i also wanted the comparisons in here in case ppl aren't from amercia etc#this ISNT normal or usual. this was overkill by like a million#on the other hand they gotta do this bc they're scared :)#i kept this bc i had ppl ask me not to delete this but i just felt like#it wasn't really poetry just talkin
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Analysis so bad you don't even know what it's talking about anymore.
#chrambles#not a lily orchard video (i have never watched one in my life im sorry for whoever did)#being a homestuck fan alone is hell. people make shit up and call it canon unironically its painful#can be of any form of analysis btw your responses are so insightful (and also funny)#if you mention dirkjohn in the tags then youre the one who needs to reread the canon material again lol
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collection of posts for a very specific dynamic
#pallas post its#not sure how to tag this one ngl#zolu#this is about zolu#but also my ocs and me from real life#5927#also.#web weaving#normal dynamics
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#me except I DO make it because I'm BUILT DIFFERENT (also in a pretty privileged position in my life rn)#reaction image#reaction meme#daily reaction images#image mood: [undefinable]
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the funniest meltdown ive ever had was in college when i got so overstimulated that i could Not speak, including over text. one of my friends was trying to talk me through it but i was solely using emojis because they were easier than trying to come up with words so he started using primarily emojis as well just to make things feel balanced. this was not the Most effective strategy... until. he tried to ask me "you okay?" but the way he chose to do that was by sending "👉🏼👌🏼❓" and i was so shocked by suddenly being asked if i was dtf that i was like WHAT???? WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME?????????? and thus was verbal again
#yeehaw#1k#5k#10k#posts that got cursed. blasted. im making these tag updates after... 19 hours?#also i have been told it should say speech loss bc nonverbal specifically refers to the permanent state. did not know that!#unfortunately i fear it is so far past containment that even if i edited it now it would do very little. but noted for future reference#edit 2: nvm enough ppl have come to rb it from me directly that i changed the wording a bit. hopefully this makes sense#also. in case anyone is curious. though i doubt anyone who is commenting these things will check the original tags#1) my friend did not do this on purpose in any way. it was not intended to distract me or to hit on me. im a lesbian hes a gay man. cmon now#he felt very bad about it afterwards. i thought it was hilarious but it was very embarrassed and apologetic#2) “why didn't he use 🫵🏼?” didn't exist yet. “why didn't he use 🆗?” dunno! we'd been using a lot of hand emojis. 👌🏼 is an ok sign#like it makes sense. it was just a silly mixup. also No i did not invent 👉🏼👌🏼 as a gesture meaning sex. do you live under a rock#3) nonspeaking episodes are a recurring thing in my life and have been since i was born. this is not a quirky one-time thing#it is a pervasive issue that is very frustrating to both myself and the people i am trying to communicate with. in which trying to speak is#extremely distressing and causes very genuine anguish. this post is not me making light of it it's just a funny thing that happened once#it's no different than if i post about a funny thing that happened in conjunction w a physical disability. it's just me talking abt my life#i don't mind character tags tho. those can be entertaining. i don't know what any of you are talking about#Except the ppl who have said this is pego/ryu or wang/xian. those people i understand and respect#if you use it as a writing prompt that's fine but send it to me. i want to see it#aaaand i think that's it. everyday im tempted to turn off rbs on it. it hasn't even been a week
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the desire to pronounce words as they are said in their source language for the sake of accuracy vs the desire to not sound like a complete tool
#also the desire to not repeat the completely accidental and undesired racefaking incident of 2023#marina marvels at life
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take my hand for a moment
your objective from this point on is to survive
the election results are going to take a few days. The world is going to be very tense. I want you to take all the things you like to do to distract yourself and splurge on them. I want you to go eat your favroite foods and spend time with friends. I want you to do what you gotta do to make sure you can make it through the week.
There are people out there who want you to survive. There are people out there who are just as scared as you are.
We'll get through this. We will find a way
#us elections#us politics#also if this means you block news outlets online for a little bit then so be it#genuinely though if shit hits the fan please choose life#if things go south we will find a way out together i promise
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the picture of dorian gray (1890) - oscar wilde
"fuck my yaoi life"
#hope everyone is doing well#with finals especially#going to see wicked soon#holding space for it#my friend says this all the time#fuck my yaoi life#and also fuck my baka life#blackout poem#blackout poetry#author#book#poetry#thought this book was appropriate for this
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having online friends who are busy is just like. I LOVE YOU. I miss you. YOU GOT THIS. I'm giving you space to work. I LOVE YOU.
#also if anyone wants my discord ever just hmu#I love all of my mutuals and online besties and life will be busy but I will be here#but also i miss you. i hope you're well <3#pocket friends
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