#but Rylan sees the chance to use it for good

[ghostradiodylan]

I subscribed to a Russian dataminer for cut content from The Quarry. You’re not supposed to share and I understand why and support paying people for their work! Buuuut I also understand why people might be hesitant to pay someone in Russia on a poorly translated website to access this stuff, so I’m gonna take my chances with potentially being banned because a couple of these things the Quarry fandom at large needs to see! Screenshots and discussion under the cut.

[you can subscribe or send tips here if you’re interested, they do have more SMG stuff including cut DPA content]

Thank you @insertlovelyperson for this!

These are somewhat Ryan and/or Dylan centric because I find them the most interesting, but they also had the most story-impacting cut content IMO.

RYAN WAS SUPPOSED TO BE ABLE TO WARN DYLAN ABOUT THE WEREWOLF OUTSIDE THE RADIO HUT.

I know I’ve talked to a bunch of people about this. I know @andromaqves was one and I can’t remember who else but omfg, justice for Ryan!! I think they cut this because they made the werewolf more obvious than Justice's performance indicated but THAT MAKES IT WORSE. DO YOU NOT SEE HOW THAT MAKES IT WORSE YOU GUYS?!

Ryan also could have had the chance to actually get a shot off against Silas in the version of the radio hut scene where Dylan isn't bitten, and he'd think he had killed the werewolf.

Then as he's heading back to the radio hut, Dylan warns him that it's coming back and we get the rest of the scene as it plays out in the game.

I get why they cut this, because if they established for certain that regular bullets can't actually harm the werewolves, there's no stakes to Abi potentially shooting Nick, but it's a cool sequence, it's always good to see the boys work together, and it would have been AWESOME if Ryan could have been infected here instead of Dylan!

This exchange just made me laugh:

Kaitlyn to Ryan: you really look up to Mr. Hackett.

Ryan: Yeah, he’s always been nice to me.

Kaitlyn: Well, so have I!

Ryan: A few days ago I slipped on wet grass and ate shit and you laughed and shouted ‘Nice Walkin Christopher Walken' and everyone called me that for the rest of the day.

Kaitlyn: See, you get my best bits! 😂😂😂

Dylan reads Ryan the synopsis of a romance novel they find in Mr. H’s office that appears to be a thinly veiled reference to the bonfire love triangle. 😂

Ryan and Kaitlyn: actually showing care and concern for Dylan post-amputation instead of pretending it didn't happen.

Dylan, in shock but still an asshole: I'm fine, I’m doing better than Kaylee Hackett. 💀

Again, this is just funny and a great question from Emma.

Abi can not be into the kiss with Nick, presumably due to the no-longer-in-place relationship system. I'm betting if you didn't get their relationship stats up you would get this result.

Laura claims to Ryan that Chris Hackett drunkenly admitted that his family was KILLING PEOPLE who were investigating them, but there's nothing else to back that up in the datamine that I've found so far (not that I think she made it up lol, just that it would have been interesting if the Chris scene was cut to remove that too).

And the one my heart can't fucking take, Kaitlyn and Dylan on the way to the scrapyard variant where Ryan has kissed Kaitlyn at the bonfire and they actually talk about it because she asks Dylan if he's jealous of Laura getting to go off with Ryan. He says he's jealous but not of Laura...

"You're pretty awesome and I'm... just Dylan" 😭 😭 😭

And, "you guys seem like you've got a connection"?? Kaitlyn as Rylan shipper, confirmed. 💖

More details and discussion on the Discord @itscomingupaces made us: https://discord.com/invite/RHgdqBBXh7

[bloomingkyras]

Carmen: Hey..I'm sorry.. I just gave the girls their bedtime and I didn't know that u stop by at this early. If not u can meet them. U can go to their bedroom if u want?

Juan: (shaking his head) Nah..it's ok. I will meet them tomorrow morning. I just come to ask about u? would u mind if we have a talk?

Carmen: Sure..I'm waiting for my cake to bake. What u want to talk about?

Juan: I see, that u look a bit different after we breakup..Did u see someone? I'm sorry, if i'm too nosy. Did the girls know it?

Carmen: No..That not my priorities for now. I'm happy of what I have. Maybe someday. By the way, Corrin call me the other day, that u both had a son? It's true, Juan?

Juan: (sigh) I thought she will not telling u before me. But yeah..It's true.His name is Rylan. And I'm gonna take the custody on him, since Corrin's husband won't allow her to take care of him after he turn 6. And someday I want him to meet his sister's. If u don't mind?

Carmen: I'm not sure..Let's ask them. I'm sure they will ok with that. If u ask me.

Juan: Are u sure,u don't see any one? Can I still got a chance, to be a good dad and (sigh) maybe? It's ok if not.. (touch her face) Carmen, u are a greatest mum, that I have see..again..I'm sorry of what happen to us.. I do really hope that u don't have grudge on me. And thanks for letting me be a part of this situations. I'll better get going before late. See u guys tomorrow.

Carmen: Thanks, Juan..I let them know, that u coming tomorrow if they awake. Take care.

*Creator's notes: I don't know how to explain but both Carmen and Juan decided to be co-parenting and declared their relationships as friends.I also forgot to said that, Carmen got the custody of both girls and Juan will take turn to take care of them on weekend or when the girls need him and vice versa. And a bit tea, Rose know that both of her Mama and Papa are not living together.

[evertidings]

maybe it's my (unhealthy?) need to fix everything, but i was quite disappointed that i couldn't follow Blane to the bathroom, then talk some sense into A and then beg K and Rylan to give us one more chance. it's so hard to choose who to spend time with, and even though i only want to romance my sassy half-vampire <3, i still want to read the scenes with the others to get to know and befriend them. please don't take this the wrong way, it's just that all your characters are so damn interesting <3

my initial thought when i got this ask (in the kindest and nicest way possible) was kinda like “well, we can’t always get we want.” but i was playing @infamous-if yesterday and hit a part where the game branched off into three scenes and it kinda hit me that oh fuck, this is what it feels like to be a player and not see all the scenes at once.

like, i get it. as a reader i do get it. you want to do all three (or however many) scenes you want in one playthrough but the game just, just doesn’t allow it. but as a writer i giggle a little because, well, it just entices you to play more. these scenes are such boosters for replayability. i don’t even think it’s intentional half the time they just… are. that’s the beauty of these games i guess. if you want to play all the branches, that’s a good sign :))

[pbandjz]

𝐅𝐞𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬

𝐏𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠- 𝐁𝐥𝐚𝐳𝐞 𝐱 𝐟𝐞𝐦!𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫

𝐂/𝐖- 𝐀𝐧𝐠𝐬𝐭/𝐂𝐨𝐦𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐭, 𝐅𝐥𝐮𝐟𝐟, 𝐬𝐥𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐧𝐬𝐟𝐰

–𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐥𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐛𝐲 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐬𝐞𝐥𝐟 𝐨𝐧 𝐌𝐲𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐞𝐞𝐭. 𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐠𝐞𝐭 𝐚 𝐩𝐡𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐜𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐟𝐫𝐨𝐦 𝐃𝐨𝐭𝐭𝐢𝐞 (𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐛𝐞𝐬𝐭 𝐟𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝) 𝐚𝐬𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐢𝐟 𝐲𝐨𝐮’𝐝 𝐣𝐨𝐢𝐧 𝐡𝐞𝐫, 𝐃𝐚𝐧𝐢𝐞𝐥, 𝐑𝐲𝐥𝐚𝐧 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐁𝐥𝐚𝐳𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐋𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐚𝐝𝐢𝐬𝐞 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐲𝐨𝐮'𝐫𝐞 𝐨𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐨𝐚𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡, 𝐭𝐨 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐬𝐮𝐫𝐩𝐫𝐢𝐬𝐞, 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲𝐨𝐧𝐞!--

DISCLAIMERRR!!!

(IM SORRY IF THERES ANY MISSSPELLS ILL FIX IT IN THE MORNING THIS IS A RUSHED POST IM SORRY READERS <333)

Chapter 2

You begin to wake up as you hear a hurried knock on your door. The sun shining through the sheer curtains hits you in the eyes. You rub the sleepiness from them and push open the curtains to see outside. You can hear the water moving against the boat as it flows swiftly through it. You start to get up from your comfortably thin sheets. Making your way to the door, you hear Dottie outside talking to other people. You let out a tired groan before opening the door. “Good Morning sleepy head!” Dottie barges into your room along with Nana, Aphmau, Katelyn and Lucinda. Closing the door behind her, she looks at you with bright eyes. “Soooo….?” Dottie looks at you expectantly. “So..? what??” You look around at the girls as they get comfortable on the floor and bean bags. “Well you know ... I saw how Blaze was holding you last night and I couldn't help but tell the girls about it!!” She looks up at you apologetically as you stumble onto the edge of your bed and she sits on a pillow she took off your bed. Your eyes widen and your face flushes a bright red. You throw yourself back onto your bed as the room erupts in giggles and chuckles. You get up and shoot a glare at the pouting Dottie you wrap yourself in your comforter and reach for your pillow. You smile stupidly and giggle into your pillow while wiggling, making everyone giggle and let out teasing “oooos”. You look up at the group of girls keeping only your eyes visible. You give them a nervous look. “NO WAYYY” Nana giggles and holds onto Lucinda for emotional support so she doesn't explode. Lucinda pats her head comforting her and chuckles. ���What happened after Dottie and the boys left anyways? All Dottie told us is what she saw happen before making Daniel and Rylan leave you alone with that Blaze guy~”. Your jaw drops as you turn your head to Dottie giving her a fake glare pulling away from the pillow. “Yeah! Tell us what happened!” Katelyn looks up at you from the bean bag with a teasing grin. You look around the room nervously and Dottie's tail starts wagging with anticipation. You turn to meet Nana's eyes sparkling with joy on the verge of squealing and her tail swaying in the air excitedly. You let out a long sigh before putting the pillow on your lap. 

After a longer pause, you break the deafening silence. “....I think he kissed my head while I was falling asleep…after he carried me to my room last night..” You can't bring yourself to make eye contact with the group but you can hear Nana start to squeal and giggle silently. You notice after a moment of stunned silence someone had stood up. You feel warm hands wrap around your wrists, prying them off your shame pillow. You look up at Dottie, “THIS IS TOTALLY YOUR CHANCE!!” The other girls start humming in agreement. Before you can pull your hands away, Dottie drops them and puts her hands on your shoulders with a more sincere smile. “It's been enough time y/n…you should really go for it this summer..” She looks at you almost worried but with a smile nonetheless. You look around again to soft worried smiles and quiet agreements. You look back at her with a soft smile. ”I-I'll go for it..” You nervously reply. Dottie sits back down on the pillow. Nana continues to giggle and yap about the two of you, You laugh and continue to converse with the group in a circle on the floor. The group falls silent as a knock on the door surprises them.

“Hey y/n?”. You can tell its blaze by his voice. Dottie gives you "the look" again along with everyone else in the room. He knocks again after a few seconds pass by. ”Is she still asleep?” You hear him whisper to himself. You see Dottie attempt to say something but before she could, you stumble to cover her mouth with your hands. He knocks on the door once more but much quieter making Nana giggle. Damn. Worse timing ever Blaze. You curse in your head.

Sighing, you get up and slowly open the door. Looking up at the sleepy red-haired boy. You can see his eyes wandering into the room as Nana, Katelyn, Lucinda and Dottie giggle. “Oh! I'm sorry, is now a good time better?” He whispers scratching his chest. “YE- ahem. Yeah! Now is a good time! Don't mind them..” You giggle nervously. “They barged in this morning." You close the door behind you and lean against it smiling while drifting your eyes away with embarrassment. He chuckles and brings his hand to rest it on your head. You look up at him surprised. “What?” He smirks, looking into your eyes. This time his hair was bright red and the light coming through the hall window was shining on his blue and green eyes. You blush softly and smile. “Nothing, how'd you sleep?” He asks while pulling his hand off your head and into the pocket of his sleeping pants. You think for a moment. “Hmm, pretty good actually. It's my first time sleeping on a boat. I'm surprised I didn't get sick” You giggle. “uh how'd you sleep?” You ask looking into his gentle gaze. Your heart skips a beat when you make eye contact with such loving eyes. But you keep your ground and keep looking. Blaze brushes his fingers through his hair. “I slept pretty good too. I'm glad you got your rest. I had a talk with Guy this morning. He said we’d be on the Island by tonight or tomorrow morning. Anyways, I was wondering if you wanted to join us for breakfast! You can tell the girls too if you want”. You smile at him. “Thanks for letting me know Blaze. I'll be sure to tell them. I'm sure they're hungry after bothering me this early.” You both giggle and wave your goodbyes. You attempt to open the door but you can feel someone holding the door closed. You push it open and watch as the group stumble to their feet and look down in shame. “Breakfast is waiting for you. We can talk about this later..” You point out of the room as you watch them walk out with their heads down. You close the door and change into something cute and comfy with your bathing suit under it. You planned on finally putting the outdoor pool to good use before getting to the island.

 As you walk out you can hear the sound of chatter over the faint sound of sizzling bacon. Walking into the room, Dottie pats the seat in between her and Blaze. "Saving it to tease me.." You think, giving her a glare before sitting on the stool. Giving Blaze a soft sleepy smile. “Your outfits are pretty cute you know?” You can feel your cheeks turn a soft red. “Thanks..” You couldn't look around or it would make it obvious but you could feel the gazes of all the girls burning in your direction. You look away casually. You were correct. They were all giving you “the look”, but stopped before anyone else saw it. You roll your eyes and watch as Aaron serves Aphmau breakfast, and then kisses her on the head. You smile but your heart yearns a little bit. For someone (BLAZE COUGH) to embrace you like that. He finished plating and serving all the bacon and took a seat next to the short girl. All you hear is the sound of crunchy bacon being bitten into. But all you can think of is soft lips meeting the skin on her forehead. As you finish up you notice Blaze has also finished. He looks down as you both get up from your seats and smiles at you. Before you can think of something to say you were interrupted by an excited giggle. You turn to see Nana. She ducks and avoids looking at you. She was watching the entire thing. “What's wrong Nana?” Zane asks nervously. “Hm? Oh! Nothing, I'm just uhh excited! To go to the pool today!” “ Me too!” You blurt out. “Oh, ok then.. Well, we can go after this if you'd like Nana.” Zane smiles at the pink-haired Meif’wa as she giggles and hugs his arm. “Who wants to join me and Zane?” She asks, swaying her tail around happily. Everyone but Lucinda chimes in to agree. “I'm more of a beach girl. I'll stay out of the water if anyone needs me.” We all head outside to the top of the boat. The blue sky cleared of any gloominess. A few clouds are enough to make a small cooling breeze pick up on this hot sunny day. It was relaxing. You slipped out of the baggy clothes to reveal a soft pink and blue bathing suit. Nana had helped you pick one out. It fits you perfectly. Reaching for the bag Nana had brought with her, you pull out 2 bottles of sunscreen. You gesture for Nana to come to you and she does happily. You both open a bottle and Nana yells at all the boys that weren't already putting some on, to line up in front. You watch as Blaze, Daniel, Rylan, and Garroth all fight their way out of the pool. Blaze and Garroth being in the lead stand in front of you. Before Garroth gets a word in, Nana calls Zane to come get sunscreen as well. He gets up while groaning and mumbling to himself. “Aw, that's not fair!” Garroth pouts and grumbles. You both get to work. You feel extra nervous to touch Blaze but you do it anyway to not seem suspicious. You put a little bit on his shoulders and chest. You can feel his eyes staring at you. You look up and he is. Your heart skips another beat as you continue to spread the lotion across his tanned arms. He chuckles as you hesitate to rub the sunscreen across his chest. So you pull his hand out and put some on his hand. “Spin,” you say cheerily. Spreading more on his back you can't help but admire it while gliding your hands gently but firm enough to not leave a white cast. You reach up to his neck to cover the nape of his neck and shoulders. You can see the goosebumps form on his skin as you gently rub your hands against his neck making you giggle. When you're done you pat him on the back. He turns to you and grabs the bottle from your hands. He sits on the chair and pulls you in closer by your arm. Gently place his hands covered in sunscreen on your arms one by one. He makes his way to your chest. He carefully covered it in sunscreen, trying not to get his hands on or in your swimsuit. His hands were big and callus but his grip on your side held you still and the gentle but firm rubbing made you turn red. He finishes the front and turns you around. Finishing up, you look at each other and finish helping everyone else put sunscreen on.

[izayoichan]

Lucas just smiled and nodded, as the two of them planned to go shopping first and then help River after. It was nice though, to see that one of Carl’s two kids clearly took after him, and was learning in his fathers restaurant. Although he loved the coffee that River made for him, neither had the skills to teach Liam, so that this chance came along, made him very happy.

With that summer did what it always seemed to do, which was go by way too fast. Liam juggled his summer job with the barista, and helping out at the shelter, and both Lucas and River noticed how much happier he seemed than when he was at school. Both Dinah and Logan had gotten their first summer jobs as well, but they did spend quite a lot of time at the shelter alongside Liam. For Rylan and Ye-min the summer was filled with lots and lots of practice. They were slowly getting their first throw into their routine, so it was a lot of off-ice practice, on top of a lot on the ice. Although they both said Ty didn’t have to, he was mostly found at the rink or at their practice. Especially when they used the strength training, which Tyvan was also doing after a talk with his parents and Vy, to help him train both his legs and to help him with his upper body strength on the side. And where you found Tyvan, you would also find Amuary. Of course, when they had time, they joined the others for being at the shelter, movie nights, outside tent nights, and in general, all the good things of summer. 

Beginning - Previous - Next

[aphilosopherchair]

Ghosts Feeling the Economic Squeeze

The economy is tough for everyone, but it's especially tough for ghosts. With so many people out of work, ghosts are finding it hard to find jobs that they're qualified for.

"It's a ghost town out there," said Casper, a ghost who has been looking for work for months. "There just aren't enough jobs for everyone."

"It's been really competitive," said Bryan Wilson, another ghost, who was laid off from his job as a night watchman. "So many other ghosts are also looking for work."

Miss Frizzle, a ghost who was a former teacher, said that she's been struggling to find a new job. "I'm qualified and I have experience, but no one seems to want to hire a ghost," she said.

But why do ghosts need jobs? "In a story universe where the paranormal did not exist, we would be just dead. But we have a chance here. And given the customs of the fiction we live in, we need to buy things like ectoplasm and spectral silk to keep that chance. Consumers don't want to read about totally undignified and unclothed ghosts," explained a ghost named Emily.

"Just like us humans, ghosts have needs to feel comfortable and safe," said Stella C. Ai, an afterlife care expert. "They also want to have a sense of belonging in the world they live in, so they might desire their own homely, private space, which graveyards are not."

"And although they might not require food in the same way humans do, they may still have a hunger for energy, especially if they need to stay buoyant in places haunted by toxicity and apathy," she added.

Many employers are expectedly reluctant to hire ghosts, worried that ghosts would be disruptive or scare away customers.

"We just don't think ghosts are a good fit for our company culture," said one manager, who declined giving her name. "We're looking for someone who is friendly and approachable, and ghosts just don't fit that bill."

Another problem is that ghosts are not as versatile as humans. They can't do many of the jobs that humans do, such as driving, cooking, or cleaning.

"We're pretty limited in what we can do," said another ghost, Floaty. "We can't really interact with the physical world, so that rules out a lot of jobs."

The job market for ghosts is also being affected by the rise of technology. Some companies are now using robots to perform tasks that were once done by ghosts, such as scaring people in haunted houses.

"It's not fair," said Robbie, a ghost who was replaced by a robot. "I'm the real deal, and I can do the job better than any robot."

But some employers are starting to see the benefits of hiring ghosts. Ghosts are often very hard-working and dedicated employees. They're also very good at getting things done without being noticed.

"I've been very impressed with the work of our ghost employees," said Mr. Jenkins, a manager of Happy Inn. "They're always on time and they always get their work done."

Some ghosts are working as actors in ghost movies and TV shows, tour guides in haunted houses, and psychics and mediums.

"It's not ideal, but it's better than nothing," said Ghost of Christmas Past, a ghost who works as a tour guide. "At least I'm getting to see some new places."

A growing group has even started working as influencers on social media. They share their ghostly experiences and advice with their followers, and some have even managed to amass large followings.

"It's a great way to connect with other ghosts and share our stories," said one ghost influencer, who goes by the moniker ghost_with_a_plan. "And it's also a great way to make money."

So while the economic climate is definitely challenging, there are still ways for ghosts to find work. With a little creativity and determination, they can find success in the workforce.

Reported by Rylan Bard, a journalist for Nether Yammer. Additional reporting by Human, a ghost writer, ergh, human ghost writer, ergh, human writer for Nether Yammer.

Check out the rest of this Tumblr site for crucial and actual diversity-themed content.

[wheat-angel]

Questions 1-5 from the Casual Ask Game for Wheatley if he doesn't mind (@dzvagabond)

(Thank you for the ask @dzvagabond ! You're also giving me the chance to answer this with the two different Wheatley's that I F/O. >:3c)

1. Well, go on, introduce yourself!

Oh bloody- THAT'S what I was forgetting to do yesterday! Sorry sorry, I'll get on with that now.

'Ello there! I'm Wheatley Merchant. Here's a picture of me Ry drew.

(Ignore the date that's wrong now whoops)

Uhhh I'm not sure what else to tell you other than what's on that reference, honestly, kinda already covers a lot, yeah? I mean, obviously I'm the one on the left right now. But that's a given. I suppose th@t'S mE-

...uH, 'eLl0?

'Ello?

Oh! Hi there. Sorry had to connect in to see the question- Oh I thought I forgot something! Well, let me do that now: My name is Wyatt Lee. Sector- Nope, not the MCA, Lee.

Uh, 'scuse me. Force of habit, MCA is where I work y'see. J-Just call me Lee. Anyways, I have a drawing of me and Rylan that she drew... Ah! Found it!

Uh, let's see, I'm 7'0- Yes I'm serious and yes the weather is good up here- and as you can see I'm an android. I'm pansexual and use He/Him pronouns. Uh, I think that's all the basics? Let's see, what's next?

(The rest of Lee's responses will be Purple for the sake of ease.)

2. So, how have you and (Rylan) been? What have you two been up to recently?

Been good! Not really much of note being honest. Except Halloween recently, but we just kinda cuddled and ate candy.

Great! The only thing I can think of is we went to a work party for Halloween with some co-workers/friends. Ry's been going out more and more so I can go to a few parties which I appreciate. I personally love em, but I promise I pay it back in full by equally spending time inside with her. And even if they don't wanna go that's OK too!

3. How did you and (Rylan) meet anyways? What was that first encounter like?

...Back in Aperture. Yeahhh that's uh. I don't think I really need to describe the first encounter besides we were in a bad situation and trying to get out of it. So uh. Skip.

It was when Rylan first started working for the MCA. They got scared shitless when they heard my voice for the first time. Nearly jumped a full foot off the ground... Then apologized when they saw me and said "Sorry, you just sounded like a friend I had." Uh, I kinda didn't get it then, but looking back, they were talking about their Wheatley from their world.

4. So, like, how is (Rylan) as a person?

Ohhh where to begin? She's just- They're so amazing y'know? I mean, they're the whole package of kind, generous, steadfast in her morals, loyal, funny... And she is... So beautiful to me. In like- A She AND gender-neutral way? Anyways, honestly, couldn't ask for more.

Well, I mean, what's not to love? She's smarter than she gives herself credit for, they'll be patient with me, well except for when I'm taking my time heheh. That's- That's a joke. Just teasing. Anywho- honestly I love them for the kindness they got, and the moral compass... Plus their laugh is EVERYTHING to me.

...Also, bonus points for being damn pretty. Like my god- They are a fucking knockout.

5. Any upcoming plans with (Rylan)? Like in the next coming week or even month maybe?

Christmas! And uh- otherwise that's kinda it. Nothing really planned.

Oh, just Christmas. And since we went to a Christmas work party last year, and we didn't go to the Halloween one that year... Yeah you can imagine where I'm heading with this one- doing vice versa this year. Though before holidays come to give us our off days, Ry is trying to figure out presents for our close group friends from work. I mean, I am too. One of them is really hard to shop for- *cough cough* Emmerson *cough* -but we'll get through it and then we're scot free to cuddle up during the holidays.

[college-girl199328]

Consumers are scoring deals at Calgary auction that’s pivoted to selling online shopping returns

Christmas is coming again at Rylan Herndier’s house. On New Year’s Eve, he picked up a load of goodies from Ollive’s Auction that he bid on this week.

“I like the excitement of an auction. It seems like everyone is getting into it. Some people get carried away with the bidding,” Herndier said with a laugh. He’ll likely win points for scoring two knitting machines — one for his wife and the other for a friend that he said retailed for four times what he spent on them.

The pandemic left some retailers struggling with return rates of around 20 to 30 percent of items sold. Then veteran auctioneer Wayne Ollive came in. For the past two years the Calgary man has been holding auctions selling thousands of returned products – some not even opened.

“You cannot imagine what we get. It’s unbelievable what people are buying online,” Ollive said. “We never know what’s coming. It’s an absolute surprise every Tuesday when we open up the boxes.”

Ollive works with a national liquidation company that sources returns from retailers. He said, on average, products are about 70 to 80 percent off depending on who is bidding against you.

“It’s pretty interesting. There are some terrific deals, but some people drive you up a few dollars more than you want to pay. However, so far everything I’ve gotten I’m extremely happy with,” Herndier said.

Like regular online shopping, online auction bidding can be done from the comfort of your home. The auction will continue for several days. Pick-up is from a southwest Calgary warehouse currently packed with everything from air fryers and paddleboards to steam cleaners and electronics.

With inflation taking a bite out of everyone’s budget, the chance to get something at the price you want to pay for it seems like a good deal. However, there is the risk that comes with buying something that isn’t from the retailer.

“A lot of customers buy items that they said they would never think about buying but they see it and they’re sitting at the kitchen table and they can shop right there and they will buy it when normally they would never buy it, but (they’re) very happy that they ran across it because they can use it,” Ollive said.

Ollive added they get around 1,000 items at each auction. He said customers are welcome to come to the warehouse to check out the product in person but he said not many people do.

[rylanspratt]

✘ ╱  better keep an eye on RYLAN PRATT whenever they are around. Some say the TWENTY FIVE year old made their name by being a DRUG SMUGGLER for THE COMMAND. Feared by their RECKLESS + UNPREDICTABLE tendencies, however, their CHARISMATIC + ENERGETIC side helps maintain the facade. Can be easily found in MANHATTAN working as A MODEL.

[ Depression tw, drugs tw, anxiety tw, eating disorder tw, alcohol tw ]

Money bought you comfort, security, an education, designer clothes as well, but apparently it couldn’t buy you security inside your own mind. If she had to hear the words ‘what do you have to be sad about?” one more time the chances are Rylan Platt would go swinging for whoever’s mouth it had come out of because they were words she’d been hearing all her life. Born on the Upper East Side into a painfully wealthy socialite family had it not been medically impossible she’d have come out of her mother with a golden pacifier in her mouth. She sure as hell had one in it not long after.

Appearances being everything to Olivia and Kennedy Pratt so they naturally sent their daughter to the most prestigious schools, the best after school clubs, and had tutors to make sure she didn’t flunk out and embarrass the family. That was all good and well, but nothing really caught Rylan’s attention until she started playing piano as well as singing when she started high school - it gave her a freedom that she’d craved desperately longer than she’d even been aware herself. Plagued by insecurity her entire life her own mind had been a prison to her but when she closed her eyes to let the music carry her away there was a small rest from that fog.

Her depression had started to develop around the time she hit puberty, fuelled by body image issues that spilled over into other aspects of her life including her own feelings of self worth. Suddenly she would get into such negative self loathing mainframes she would spent days at a time in bed, hiding out from the world, sometimes crying and sometimes just laying there staring at the ceiling. Obviously her parents threw money at the problem, sending her to shrink after shrink who medicated her on and off, but nothing seemed to ever truly work enough to stop the depression from rearing its ugly head every so often. These days she is pretty fast and loose when it comes to taking her medication, as well as going to see her therapist. When she’s feeling good the woman is convinced she doesn’t need one, it’s only when that crippling depression hits her like a school bus that she is in a position where she needs someone to talk to. Only problem is that those are the times, sometimes weeks in succession, where she doesn’t get out of bed. Not particularly helpful when it comes to her career as a model for many high end brands and magazine spreads, the obvious choice of career for a girl plagued by insecurity. The industry was brutal, and more often than not she would end up lower than before in the wake of a shoot.

When she was approached by someone regarding making some extra money on the side helping to shift the drugs she herself was addicted to - Rylan saw it as an opportunity to rebel against her parents. Playing the model on the outside but additionally using her trips abroad for shoots or fashion week to smuggle contraband back into the United States for The Command.   Not needing to get a ‘proper job’ thanks to the comfortable nest egg her parents passed on to her every month and the highly paid advertising campaigns she landed every couple of months as the face of big brands, she could afford to spend her time indulging in her passions. Writing her own music mainly, but also partying her face off. Now she could do it while making some extra cash on the side and her naïvety left her not thinking about the repercussions that she could face being part of such a dangerous group.  

Rylan was with the same boyfriend for two years when he proposed to her at New Year, leading her to panic at the prospect of being tied to someone she … thought she loved for the rest of her life was terrifying. She’d been convinced they were made for each other for most their relationship but that had changed a few months earlier when she’d met his coworker and seen what love at first sight really was. The two of them ended up breaking up in the wake of the proposal to Rylan on New Year’s eve. Panicked by the level of commitment it involved she said no, literally running from the scene and into the arms of Nate Jones who she’d been with ever since, although they’d been forced to keep their relationship secret until only about six months ago. He didn’t know of her involvement with The Command - Rylan not wanting to pull him down into that when her emotional baggage already caused him enough worry. 

Still she was a vibrant young woman who loved to socialise, be out with friends, drink in the culture of New York City, and explore her own creativity through her music and keep up to date with everything fashion. Writing songs for and about friends, family, situations she got herself into, anything that sparked her inspiration. Everything around her. It was only when she was hit with her depression and insecurity that the girl changed into a shell of herself, it could be hard to watch according to people she had talked to about it in the past. The girl was a sweetheart, but that didn’t mean she didn’t have her fair share of people who didn’t like her, often because she felt threatened by them so she would lash out before they got the chance to. Before they could tell her what she thought was the truth - that she wasn’t worthy of many of the things she had - she’d make sure they knew they weren’t either. It wasn’t a healthy way to communicate but it was entirely involuntary. Plagued with the pressures of looking good in front of the camera which overflowed into her eating habits, an addiction to party drugs that had developed into something far more serious, and her need to numb her feelings with alcohol, Rylan was certainly not an easy person to be around sometimes. 

[cupcakecoterie]

@true0neutral - Hazel, half-elf cleric

@miaaoi - Froseth, dragonborn monk

@hyperewok1 - Remi, human paladin/warlock

@lindira - Clarity, tiefling rogue/warlock

Marion - Ava, human ranger

Brian - Barnabus, minotaur fighter

@lovemmawesome - Rylan, wood elf sorcerer

We were missing a @fauxfire76 this particular day on account of travel-related shenanigans, but I stepped in as best I could. It’s way easier with @miaaoi ‘cos Froseth’s quiet; harder to step in for a bard since they’re not generally the quiet types.

Almost immediate problems sprung up because some of the folks I asked to give me the kinds of questions they were researching in their parts of the Silver Vault kind of ... didn’t. So Darvin found that his “bard tales and songs from that particular date and time” section was more about teaching the songs themselves and bardic technique, and Ava got overwhelmed with the sheer level of research material, being more used to guided study with tutors.

Hazel with help from Froseth asked some questions outside the Silver Vault, mostly in relation to Tharizdun and what names he might go by in the Southern Lands beyond Tharizdun and the Chained Oblivion. There weren’t any additional names, but apparently the nomenclature “Chained Oblivion” was reserved for high-ranked ‘people’ and the irredeemably tainted. Anyone who was just worshipping in the common way stuck with Tharizdun, and the question for later became “what do they think Tharizdun is a god of, anyway?”

Clarity stuck with practicalities, for the most part, researching teleportation magics in general and specifically teleportation circles in and around Baronsvere. Most of them weren’t particularly helpful, or potentially buried under rubble or black sludge, but they did see the one in the palace at Blackcrown as a potential entry point for their dealing with King Jain Nerrand III so long as an army of Belarys mercenaries was adequately distracting the standing army of Crownsguard.

Remi and Barnabus were also on practicalities, sort of. They were looking at previous assaults on wellsprings of corruption, trying to look at the “what not to do” elements of it to hopefully guide their own attempts. What they got was more or less horrific, and on their “how to assault a wellspring” list is simply the words “if you don’t have divine protection, just don’t”.

Following on from that, they asked Alisaie to gain access to the World Map, hopefully to figure out any commonalities that might tell them where to find wellsprings in the Elvenwild or Baronsvere. Also to look up some of the creatures Remi and Barnabus saw in their review of wellspring assaults. She’d already pulled up some information on how various sapient species mutate under the corruption, which wasn’t fun for anybody. Unfortunately she didn’t really find anything, since the ecosystem of the Southern Lands is incredibly different than that of most of Elossa and especially the Elvenwild and Baronsvere. She has ‘educated guesses’. That wasn’t followed up on just yet.

Meanwhile, Hazel and Froseth went back to the Mythology Ampitheatre to follow up on her question about how Tharizdun is worshipped in the Southern Lands. Turns out that they don’t have the advances that Alama-Ver has in desert agriculture and the sun is mostly a source of drought for them, so most of their thoughts on the sun involve making it stop being so punishing. So an ‘eater of the sun’ probably doesn’t seem so bad to them. Hazel went vaguely nuclear.

Eventually, they figured out they’d done all they could do for the moment in terms of research and, after a variable night’s sleep and a bit of breakfast, they went to say their good-byes. Legolas the moose sulked until Hazel suggested bringing Legolas to Hearthhome, at least until Remi and Alisaie got the chance to settle down somewhere moose-friendly. The party does not deal well with unhappy animals.

And on that note, they used Hazel’s home-key to go directly from the palace courtyard to the dooryard of Hearthhome.

I’ve actually got the rest of the missed sessions ready for upload now, and I’m going to spam, so I don’t forget. Still need to check if @ladyzolstice has room for a chibi commission and really need to find Frankie on Twitter for a token, though I haven’t seen Frankie on Twitter in awhile so I hope they’re okay. Anyway, that’s all for next week.

[tar-oh]

Pick-a-Card!

So, I’ve decided to try out a pick-a-card. This is taking place of the daily cards from Thursday and Friday. It’s just a general reading, think of it as your daily card, except you get to choose a pile. You’re welcome to choose more than one, especially because some of them are kind of similar messages. Just pick whatever feels right! If you do pick, and it’s not resonating, try another pile. There is a chance there just isn’t a message for you in this pick-a-pile. If that’s the case, sorry! Maybe next time, or you can find another reader on here who resonates better.

Okay, so it goes:

Pile 1: Amethyst

Pile 2: Clear Quartz

Pile 3: We’re calling this the Pink/Gold Rock. I found it in an old jewelry box, and I’m still trying to figure out what it is.

Pile 4: Opalite

So, again. Pick whatever calls to you. You can have more than one.

Pile 1: Amethyst

New Moon in Aries, Waxing Moon, Ace of Wands, Wheel of Fortune, King of wands rx, 10 of pentacles reversed, Temperance and 5 of wands, and algiz. 

“I get so far, so fast.” - So Far, So Fast by The National

This pile seemed to be more work/creativity themed.

You're feeling inspired with new ideas. You're being advised to put these plans into action because you're on the right path. Though, you may be feeling impatient and want to jump right in. Maybe you feel that you're not quite strong enough to do so, but you are.  All that you want is possible, you just need to work for it. Remember not to go too fast and to take time out for your loved ones. Also, be smart with your finances in this time. However, things are in the universes hands, so luck is definitely on your side. For some, you may be meeting someone new. This can be romantic or platonic. They may be able to help you with these new ideas. For others, you may be dealing with an overbearing boss or authority figure. Stand your ground, but don't get too defensive and be kind (I know that really sucks because my first instinct is to chew someone out). But remember, luck is on your side, so all will work out in the end. Pile 2: Clear Quartz

Full Moon in Taurus, South Node, Ace of Cups reversed, Two of Pentacles, Queen of Pentacles, The Artist,  The Magician reversed, 7 of cups, berkana.

"I think about you way more than anything else." - Quiet Light By The National

"All the very best of us string ourselves up for love." - Vanderlyle Crybaby Geeks by the National

Oh boy. I sense heartbreak in this pile.

The biggest message I'm getting with this pile is that you're doubting your self-worth. This could have stemmed from a situation involving a heartbreak. I think some of you may have been cheated on (take what resonates).

Others may have gotten into a relationship that seemed promising, only for it to turn out not so great. You may have rushed into things with unrealistic expectations, or found that it was hard to balance this relationship with the rest of your life.

And for others, you may be pursuing something or someone that is actually quite toxic. You've created an unhealthy attachment towards this situation or person, and you need to step back and reevaluate things. The lyrics from Quiet Light, "I think about you way more than anything else," as well as the card South Node suggest this. I'm not saying this is a horrible thing. We all have our obsessions. It's just that we need to figure out which ones are healthy and which ones aren't.

Whichever applies to you, there are a few things you need to know:

One, you need to take a step back and figure out what it is exactly you want. You need a plan. Whether this be a situation involving money or a person, you need to figure out what actions you need to take. Do not rush into things. It's not the time to do so.

Secondly, listen to your intuition. If you're with someone and something feels off, then this is probably not the situation for you. You need to slow down and listen. Chances are, you already know what you need to know, you're just not paying attention.

And lastly, the Full Moon in Taurus talks about Law of Attraction. I'm not going to get into that, but there's something it says in the guide book for this card that I think applies to this: "Value yourself and others will value you too." Trust me, I know how hard it is to get out of a depressive state. I've been depressed the majority of my life. However, once I started trying to be kinder to myself and tried harder to stop doubting myself, I found myself feeling better. I'm not saying this is the end-all-be-all, or that this is going to work for everyone (I think it would be total bullshit to say that, honestly), but what I am saying is that you can program your mind to be nicer. Yes, I still have bad days, but they're less frequent. Life is not all rainbows and roses, but with a little bit of effort, it can have a few more rainbows and roses.

Whatever situation you're in, I'm sorry.  Know this: There is a new start within this situation. You can choose to start new. You can choose to free yourself of this toxic situation. I think this choice gives you power. It won't happen overnight, but an effort can help it happen. You don't deserve to be in this situation. Know that you're not alone (like seriously, if you need to talk, feel free to dm me!) Know that "All the very best of us string ourselves up for love". So, again. You're not alone. Don't let this get you down.

Sorry if this was kind of heavy, but apparently it needed to come through to someone. Maybe this was what you needed to hear to realize what kind of a situation you're in.

Pile 3: Pink/Gold Rock

Full Moon, Seven of Swords, 3 of pentacles, Death reversed, The World, Queen of Cups, Four of Swords and Ansuz (A) rune.

"There's a little bit of hell in everyone." - Rylan by The National

"I'm addicted to the soundtrack. I need the noise."  - Don’t Know Yet by Silversun Pickups

This group has a habit of keeping bad habits. It's okay, we all are there once and awhile. The problem is that you've gotten too comfortable where you're at. You've been stagnant, resisting the change. But, the thing is, when we allow ourselves to become stagnant, we grow apathetic. Is that a life worth living? This refusal to let go of bad habits and even obsessions will not end this chapter of your life. Instead, you'll be stuck reading the same three sentences over and over and none of it is going to register in your brain. You need to work on letting go of the negative and allow change to come in.  

Some of you may need to work on forgiving yourself and others, as well as stop needing to do it all alone. You may need to collaborate with others in order to work through this change. Some of you are just being hardheaded and sneaky. Don't be that way. Honestly, just Death Reversed and Seven of Swords suggest this, but I also have a feeling that one of you needs to hear this. Circling back to the thought about not needing to do it alone, this applies to you especially. You need to be open about your emotions and thoughts. Work through this with someone else.

Others may need to take a break. Clear your mind. You're ignoring your intuition. Clearing your mind may help you quiet all those doubts you have, enabling you to trust your gut. 

Overall, however, a new chapter is beginning. The World and Full Moon signal cycles ending. You're in this stage. It's up to you to be ready. Do you want to keep going back a few pages to reread what you missed while you were repeating those sentences? Or do you want to be able to finish this book and start another one? You have everything you need available to you; whether it's within yourself, or by working with others, it's up to you.

Pile #4: Opalite

Full Moon in Aries, The Lovers, The World, Ace of Pentacles, Seven of Cups, The Tower, Page of Swords, Page of Wands, 8 of Swords, Hagalaz

"Don't you know, someday, somebody will come find you?" - So Far, So Fast by the National 

"Guardian Angel, what do you see? I have tripped on all of your signs." - Romance Languages #1 by Cold War Kids

You are so smart, but you're afraid of the unknown and that's holding you back. You're terrified of what the future brings, so you allow yourself to stay stuck in this mental cage. Living in your daydreams instead of acting them out. You have a curious mind, always striving to learn new things. You're also extremely insightful, and usually you're really good at communicating. But this fear is holding you back, making you feel unfocused and unable to use your voice. I see that some of you may need to make a decision about some sort of union. Maybe this is about the joining of ideas, or a relationship. Whatever this is, it offers stability and the end of a hard chapter. But, to get here, you need to take the blindfold off and free yourself. You're ignoring all of the signs sent to you that it’s time to change, and because of this you're going to experience a tower moment. You have built a foundation that is not stable, and it's going to fall down. It may come as some shocking revelation. Or something painful. I do think this tower moment is avoidable if you already know what this decision is and can act on it, but if not it's out of your control. Once it's happened be building your foundation back up. Just remember this: you're not trapped, you've only convinced yourself this. Hope something in this resonated! I spent a lot of time on this and now I feel like I could sleep for days :( Also, still really in need of more lyrics outside of The National...I swear there’s more in the deck, but those seem to really want to come out these past weeks!

[roadklls]

hello, rylan (27, she/her, gmt+2) again, introducing you to my lil angry hedgehog by the name of kara davidsen + more info, wanted connections. / @redridgeimp​

name: kara davidsen nicknames: n/a age: 31 ethnicity: Indigenous (Awaetlatla First Nations + Himalayan; this is unknown to them, as their arrival in the orphanage was not met with any information regarding their biological family). gender/pronouns: genderfluid, they/them, she/her sexual/romantic orientation: pansexual/demiromantic been in red ridge for: on and off all their life occupation: criminal (mostly drug dealing atm) affiliation: none (deviant, though occasionally will lend a hand to valencia or whoever needs it) positive traits: loyal, observant, clever, headstrong, generous, determinate. negative traits: proud, aggressive, cold, hot-headed, cruel, resentful.

BIOGRAPHY —

(WARNINGS for child abandonment, abuse, bullying, substance abuse, medical misconduct / patient abuse, overdosing, death, violence).

red ridge, nv, 1989.  left, discarded like unwanted leftovers — they found them in a cardboard box, half-freezing, on the doorsteps of the charming orphanage. they were given a name that was supposed to be temporary, until a family would pick them up: kara. something breaking, something thunderous, like the storm raging on the night they’re found. their last name davidsen, from the orphanage of st. david’s. lost in the world, but they soon found an ally in a child left, discarded like they were — delphine, though sharing none of their blood, became their sister.

red ridge, nv, 1993. it was clear from the very beginning that the two would have to fight teeth and nails for their place in the world, but their bond served as a double-edged weapon, kept them safe with one another and the rest of the world away. the two barely ever left each other side, and kara, in particular, soon developing a violent protectiveness over their sister. this bond would allow them to sustain the abuse, the violence, the difficulties they were soon thrown into the second they were assigned to their first foster family. it is a poisonous environment, one that corrupts the valorous side of them to leave the broken parts behind, the damage. together, they fight back. together, they survive.

red ridge, nv, 1999. taken out of the foster family, they both return to st. david’s. it’s not a victory, but it’s the chance for something better to happen - kara won’t admit it, but they hold hope someday this might have a sense. find a family for the both of them, with food on the plate and fresh clothes every day.

red ridge, nv, 2001. delphine might just get that. changes of getting out st. david’s are always slim (there’s a thing about kids grown in the desert, they bark and bite as if coyotes themselves have been the one raising them), but delphine is taken away. off to a good family, off to a better family: the bond, the magical bond that had kept them fighting through the various different wildfires life had enjoyed putting them through, it suddenly broke. kara was left behind. dumbfounded, angry, a question left ringing in their head without the knowledge to put it into coherent words: what’s the point of loving, what’s the point of caring — if it all gets taken away?

red ridge, nv, 2003. but they do love, and they do care. in their own misguided, clumsy way; and one day they bring another kid in the orphanage, two years their younger, a scared, wide-eyed kid. the other kids enjoy teasing him, enjoy the look he gets when they knock the glasses off his face and he has to go scramble to find them. kara hates that. kara enjoys putting themselves between them and him and grin at them: say come on, what are you gonna do? what’s that, are you afraid? (maybe they mimic the way delphine would look after them. maybe, in their own half broken language, they are just trying to summon delphine — or their spirit, the protective archetype of an older sibling — back into their bones. they vow they will protect eric, even though they have to endure the other kids’ beatings in his place. but one day it is too much: we gotta get out of here, they say to him one night, after they found the other kids collecting punches in eric’s gut and the tutors pretending to look the other way. we gotta get out of here.

somewhere across the nevada / utah border, 2005. breaking out wasn’t the hard part; by now kara knew exactly how to slip out, just had lacked a motivation to leave the orphanage. the hard part is when they’re out in the cold, freezing their asses off somewhere in utah, trying hard to find a fucking way to live and coming up empty. they steal cans of meat from a barn; the owner finds them, threatens them both, a shotgun aimed at kara’s throat. he sees something in them, and then somehow understands: these aren’t thieves. these are assets.

eureka, ut, 2006. scott halbridge has a lot of flaws, but one couldn’t say he isn’t a resourceful man. there isn’t a single felony he and his makeshift clan haven’t dabbled with, even just for a taste of it — and the two orphans he found in his barn might just help him grow his business. the younger kid, the one with the glasses, is soft and unassuming but he’s got a skill — he’s good at handling drugs, he’s good at selling ‘em too. the other one, the girl (he keeps calling them that and kara wants to bite the vocal cords off his throat but they won’t; they won’t, he won’t understand, it’s better they just play nice) — kara’s tougher to handle. but they’re great at kicking ass, and when needed they can slip in and out of buildings and steal shit without anyone ever noticing it. they’re both extremely useful. but eric gets to try the merch he sells and he begins growing a sweet tooth for it. when the money he brings back to scott every week grows shorter by one, two, ten doses — that’s when he understands. and his way of making eric understand, too, is by jumping on him, bashing in his head, slamming him against the wall. kara doesn’t think — it’s a single instinct that leads their arms to move, retrieving the shotgun by the side of scott’s desk, aiming, shooting. the shotgun recoils back and throws them off their balance. kara falls, but so does scott: his brain sprayed all over the walls. panting, eric stares at kara. they know what he’s seeing: something damaged. something terrifying. kara breathes, wipes the blood off the side of their cheek. “we gotta go”, they say, and then they’re on the road again.

elko, nv, 2010. another kind of scott halbridge ends up taking them in. a gang of sorts, someone who has use for their talents. kara’s attitude for fighting and taking one, two, a hundred punches, proved them to be a great resource for the needs of criminal enforcers. eric’s charm, instead, proved once again to be a fruitful assets in selling drugs: they found a life of their own, as unlawful as it was, and kept surviving on their own.

carlin, nv, 2013. eric was too soft for this world. kara had known from the beginning, and yet it still caught them off guard. the drugs got the best of him, swallowed him whole — after he’d given in to a manic episode in public, he was forcefully committed to a rehabilitation facility where the limits of ethics were more than a little stretched. they’d abuse him verbally, physically, use prescription drugs on him too liberally until he was left a screaming, aching mess of a human being. once kara learned of this (once they were able to track the place they’d taken him to), they followed through with the promise they’d made with delphine years before, the one that the loss of delphine had  led to breaking but had to be respected now, for it was sacred: them against the world, no matter what. somehow, kara managed to break him out of the facility. somehow, he got his hands on drugs again. eric overdosed at the age of 22.

red ridge, nv, 2014. though kara had known anger all their life, this was the first time they experienced pain. on their own, with no destination, or even a reason to keep moving forward, they ended up back in the place where they’d began. red ridge, nevada — old contacts allowed her a way into the safe, usual business of fucking around and stealing cars, selling drugs, whatever could get them by. they were good at dealing, even good at fighting for respect. within years, they had a decent business network going on. though they didn’t care about valencia’s business in the city, and the many gangs trying to start shit in town, never did, really — they found the conflict, the violence, to be the healing balm for their aching soul. they soon began fighting at rogue’s club: though lacking discipline or any sort of training, they’d been fighting since the day they were born and could take punches for hours. the pain became a shelter, a relief. it kept them alert and out of their sorrow, out of their weakness. her life became a pantheon for violence — the fights, the ghosts, and the drugs she wouldn’t use. each of them a replacer for something she couldn’t get anymore. each blow landing against her ribcage, a reminder: this is for delphine, the way she was taken and gone forever, and perhaps a part of them had hoped coming back to red ridge would make her show up again, summoned by memories and whatever bond they’d shared — that’s a fairy tale, isn’t it? they always fucking hated those. this is for eric, the way he vanished out of thin air, no matter how much they tried to hold his molecules together, force shapeless air back into the container of his body. this is for their inability to accept it. this, at last, is for kara davidsen and all that’s left of them. a bag of bones, a blooming of bruises. and their anger: so thick, so venomous you could smell it in the air.

[varricmancer]

The Golden Halla | 3

Pairing: Cullen Rutherford x OC

A/N: Obviously I’m deviating a bit from canon. It would be rather boring if it was always the same thing though, yes? Anyway, enjoy the latest chapter! PLEASE let me know what you think. 

He was fighting desperately to stay asleep despite the pull to awareness he could feel clawing at him. He was at peace here in the fields with his mystery woman. She’d prepared them a picnic and he lounged on the blanket as he watched her dance around merrily, the skirts of her simple blue dress rippling about her bare feet, her snowy hair floating behind her like a waterfall. He smiled when she caught his eye and laughed, her joy contagious. She had claimed she was dancing his demons away, so there was no reason to be afraid of them or that she was one herself. 

“Won’t you tell me your name?”

She skipped towards him, dropping onto the blanket gracefully. 

Shrugging, she picked up a pastry and took a small nibble. Her features were somewhat hazy in this place, but her lips were still clear enough to keep him captivated. Thin, but not harsh. Soft-looking. He watched transfixed as her tongue appears to flick away some crumbs on the side of her mouth.

“You can call me Hana,” she finally answers with a teasing grin, her lovely amber eyes sparkling with mirth. 

Cullen snorts, amused. “The name of the halla? Well, if I wasn’t so certain this was a dream before, it would be clear now. That creature is taking over my life,” he sighed. 

Her laugh was a gentle thing, as lovely as her. 

“Perhaps.” 

She pauses, cocking her head thoughtfully like she was listening to something only she could hear. 

“It’s time to wake up, Cullen.” 

He loved the way she said his name. Everyone else began his name like they had something stuck in their throat. With her, it sounded like a song - one that she loved to sing. 

“Will I see you again?”

“Sooner than you think,” she chuckled, fading right before him. 

He groaned as he came to awareness, her wave of farewell still branded behind his eyes. 

The distant snickering was the first clue that he wasn’t alone. Next came the realization that there was a very warm body breathing next to him. A warm furry body. 

He cracked up one of his eyes and briefly wondered if he was still dreaming. There could be no other explanation for the fact that there was a halla cuddled up with him on top of his furs. Or that one of his arms was draped loosely across the back of the beast as though to pull it closer. He quickly pulled away in embarrassed horror, his face turning crimson as the low snickers from the front of the tent evolved into outright mocking laughter. 

“Commander, if I’d known you had a thing for horns I would have volunteered my services,” The Iron Bull laughed heartily. 

Cullen groaned and turned to face the front of his tent where Bull and The Herald were both sticking their heads into with unapologetic grins. Of all the people to find him in such an embarrassing situation, the loudmouthed Qunari mercenary and the proclaimed Herald of Andraste were not his first choice. 

He sat up and rubbed the sleep from his eyes, snorting as Hana slept on unbothered by their guests. 

“Is there something I can do for you?” 

“We heard about Loranil making it here and bringing the Halla with him. We wanted to see her again, make sure she was doing alright. She wasn’t in her stall though and Cole told us to find you. I was confused about why the Commander of this little party would know where a lone halla was - wasn’t expecting to see you two so cozy,” Kaaras Adaar shrugged with a teasing grin. Bull stood there cackling close enough to the other that their horns were surely clanging against each other. 

“Yes, she’s proven to be rather...friendly. She must have snuck in during the night. I’ll have to speak with the stable boys.” 

“There’s no shame in wanting a warm body during cold winter nights,” Bull drawled, doing what Cullen interpreted as a wink with his single eye. 

“Maker’s breath…” he grumbled, standing up and waving them away. 

“Unless there is pressing business, I’d appreciate some privacy so I might get ready. I’ll walk her over as soon as I’m done and you may visit to your heart’s content.” 

Kaaras nodded, “Alright. We’ll leave you be, Commander. We’ve all been summoned to the war room in three hours’ time for a debriefing of my experience in Redcliffe, however. Cassandra’s getting generous and actually giving me a couple of hours to recuperate from my travels before interrogating me.” 

Cullen actually grunts in amusement and waves as the two Qunari take their leave. It isn’t until he could no longer hear their stomping that the halla decides to wake up, actually yawning and looking up at him drowsily as though to ask, ‘What’s with all the racket?’ 

“This is all your fault, you know? What are you doing bursting into my tent in the middle of the night? How did you even undo the ties?” Cullen grumbles as he quickly throws on his armor and splashes his face with water he kept in a pitcher for such purposes. 

Still, as embarrassing as this whole situation was, at least he’d slept fairly well after the nightmares left him. He actually felt refreshed and starving for a full meal for the second day in a row. Perhaps the worst of his symptoms were over? He’d never heard of them leaving so quickly. Perhaps the Maker saw fit to help him in his efforts to assist with closing the breach. 

Cullen snapped at Hana to get her to follow along, which it seemed like she did reluctantly. Cullen chuckled quietly as she shook her head and blinked at him blearily when she stood up to walk towards him. It seemed even halla could not be morning risers. In a moment of weakness, he reached out and scratched behind her ear, which she seemed to love since she nickered softly and rubbed her head into the touch. 

“Alright, you’ve been spoiled enough from me for today. Back to your post, Miss Hana.” 

He led her back to the stables swiftly, waving her into her stall. As he locked her in, he could swear she was staring up at him in the halla equivalent of puppy dog eyes. 

“You’ve had free reign enough, for now. Perhaps when I take Grace out later you may come. Until then, be a good girl.” 

Hana propped her snout on the top of the gate and huffed at him. He actually cracked a smile and tossed both her and Grace an apple before he left, heading towards the war room to look over reports and discuss some things with the other advisors until the meeting. 

***

“As allies? Are you sure that’s wise?” 

Cullen stared incredulously at The Herald as he explained the horrifying events from Redcliffe. 

“Would you rather us all locked up like your mabari? Give us a sip of lyrium from time to time if we’ve been good little mages?” 

The Tevene mage that the Herald had dragged here with him from Redcliffe like a heavily perfumed stray was not helping his already shot nerves. He glared right back. 

“No. I know very well the horrors of the circles, but I know just as well the dangers that unchecked magic can bring. There are not nearly enough templars here to contain them all.” 

“They are not here to be contained, Commander,” Kaaras answered softly. “Kindly remember that Haven is just that - a haven for all. Including those that are born with something that they often never asked for in the first place.” 

As the old familiar fear receded, he felt ashamed. 

“You are right, of course. Please forgive me. I let my fear cloud my reason.” 

The Tevene mage looked at him strangely then, as though he’d found a puzzle to solve, but went silent. The Herald nodded, understanding shining in his eyes. 

“I’ve heard some of your story, so I understand your concerns. However, let us give them the benefit of the doubt for now. Many are simply happy for a chance to find the families they were taken from, so I imagine they will be much too busy for staging a takeover.” 

“Understood, Herald.” 

The Qunari nodded, adding a soft smile of reassurance that Cullen felt he didn’t deserve. He fell silent and let the others run the meeting as he lost himself in memories. 

He shook his head, forcing himself to stop thinking about such maudlin things. He had better things to worry about now. Accommodations and supplies for an extra hundred people, at least. He’d need to ask about for a more accurate tally. Increased lyrium supplies. Andraste’s ass, there was going to be lyrium everywhere. 

Cullen gulped at the realization, practically tasting the song on his tongue. But no, he could handle it. He’d tell Cassandra to increase her vigilance...and to be on the lookout for a replacement, just in case. Perhaps Rylan. 

When the meeting was over, he strode quickly from the room thinking he’d stop for a bite then take Grace out for another ride. He was halfway to the door when somewhere cleared their throat behind him. 

Turning, he found the Tevene mage eyeing him sheepishly, though he maintained his proud stance. 

“I wanted to...apoligize. That was unfair of me to start our acquaintance in such a way. I’m afraid I was being as judgemental of templars as others are of me.” 

Cullen rubs the back of his neck awkwardly. 

“That’s quite alright. I can’t say there wasn’t a time I would have deserved every word and more. Pray accept my apologies as well Magi...err...Lord...Pavus, was it?” 

The mage chuckled lowly, waving his hand with an affected flourish like many nobles were wont to do. 

“Just call me Dorian, Commander. The scary magister is my father.” 

“Alright, Dorian.” 

The mage’s smile is friendly - and perhaps a bit flirtatious. 

“I was wondering where I might bed down around here, Commander. I know many are in tents, so if you would be so kind as to point me in - Venhedis! What is that awful sound?” 

The awful sound was a horrible screeching bray coming from the stables. But it wasn’t normal. It sounded...terrified. 

“Hana!”

Cullen sprinted towards the stables, unmindful of the fact that the mage ran with him. He burst through the door and towards Hana’s stall. She was spooked horribly - her eyes wide and watching everyone fearfully as she reared back, kicking her hooves towards some unseen thing. 

“Shhh, easy girl. It’s just me. It’s alright.” 

Like it was he was her lighthouse in a storm, she latched her frightened gaze on him, letting him lead her back to calm. Once she stopped kicking he finally walked into her stall, taking a moment to note that it was unlatched already. He slowly reached out and stroked her neck, ignoring the ear-piercing screaming as it died down. She finally went quiet beyond a slight nicker, her body shaking under his hand. 

“There we go. Good girl, Hana. I’m here.” 

She stuck her head under his arm, seemingly trying to hide under his coat. 

“Friend of yours?” 

Cullen startled, meeting Dorian’s amused gaze. The mage nodded towards Hana, visibly softening in sympathy for the creature. 

“Of a sorts, I suppose. She was a gift from the Dalish for the Inquisition, but according to another elf around here she’s chosen me or something. I’ve never seen her like this before, though. She’s normally so calm. I don’t see anything that could have spooked her.” 

Dorian looks around the stables thoughtfully, humming as he holds his hand up that soon emits a slight glow. His eyes narrow as he follows some invisible thread leading towards Hana’s stall. He frowns and closes his hand before meeting Cullen’s questioning look. 

“There’s a trace of magic in here. It’s not...evil, but it’s hardly something innocent. It feels ancient.” 

Cullen strokes Hana, as she continues to use him as a shield from the world. 

“They didn’t hurt her though?” 

“No. She appears healthy, although…”

Cullen’s brow furrows as the mage stares thoughtfully at the halla. 

“Dorian, what’s wrong with her?!” 

Dorian shakes his head, “It’s not something wrong, it’s just something strange. She doesn’t feel like your average beast. She has immense power, for one thing. Immense magical power.” 

“She’s some sort of sacred halla for the Dalish...could that be it?” 

“No,” the mage shook his head, pulling on his mustache thoughtfully. “She feels like a mage. Which seems strange given the hooves and rather furry appearance, yes?” 

Cullen pried Hana’s head out from under his coat, holding her snout in his hands. For the first time, he really looked into the halla’s eyes and realized they were a warm amber ringed in black...just like the Hana from his dream. 

His breathing became unsteady as his mind struggled to understand what it was piecing together...or rather had been trying to piece together for a couple of days now. It was impossible, wasn’t it? But...he supposed nothing was truly impossible when it came to magic. 

“Dorian, this is going to sound strange, but is there a way to find out if she’s...really a halla?”

The mage quirked an eyebrow at him, “My dear Commander, I was merely theorizing. It’s always a good idea to throw out the most impossible things to narrow down the possible ones.” 

Cullen stared into Hana’s eyes, which were looking at him with such soft understanding that there was no way what he’d figured out couldn’t be true. 

“Please?” he looked at the mage, plea in his eyes. Dorian straightened and nodded firmly. 

“I’ll do some research.” 

“Thank you. And Cassandra is nearby, next to the training yard. Please inform her of what is happening - quietly, if you please - and that I’d like two men stationed outside of the stables.” 

Cullen smiled warmly at the mage as he took his leave, then turned and settled onto the bottom of Hana’s stall. 

“I’m going to feel awfully stupid if you turn out to be some sort of demon or possessed halla,” Cullen sighed, settling his hand onto her head to pet her once she plopped her head into his lap. “I’m sure everyone is going to think I’m going mad and that I’m going overboard for something they’d all rather cover in spices and serve for dinner.” 

“If someone’s done this to you though, I’ll do what I can to help.” 

Cullen sighs and settles in to keep watch over a single halla, uncaring of the troubles that lay outside the stable doors for the moment. 

[faenet]

hi I just came across your blog & i wanted to say your edits are beautiful!!! & also, I've read TOG & ACOTAR, & I wanted to ask if you have any other book recommendations that are similar I guess to TOG & ACOTAR?? Like fantasy, action & of course romance:)

I’m so glad that you enjoy our blog! Our members have a few recommendations that I’ll put under the cut:

A Darker Shade of Magic by V.E. Schwab: Kell is one of the last Antari—magicians with a rare, coveted ability to travel between parallel Londons; Red, Grey, White, and, once upon a time, Black. Unofficially, Kell is a smuggler, servicing people willing to pay for even the smallest glimpses of a world they’ll never see. After an exchange goes awry, Kell escapes to Grey London and runs into Delilah Bard, a cut-purse with lofty aspirations. She first robs him, then saves him from a deadly enemy, and finally forces Kell to spirit her to another world for a proper adventure. Now perilous magic is afoot, and treachery lurks at every turn. To save all of the worlds, they’ll first need to stay alive. (fantasy, young adult)

An Ember in the Ashes by Sabaa Tahir: Laia is a slave. Elias is a soldier. Neither is free. Under the Martial Empire, defiance is met with death. Those who do not vow their blood and bodies to the Emperor risk the execution of their loved ones and the destruction of all they hold dear. But when Laia’s brother is arrested for treason, Laia is forced to make a decision. In exchange for help from rebels who promise to rescue her brother, she will risk her life to spy for them from within the Empire’s greatest military academy. There, Laia meets Elias, the school’s finest soldier—and secretly, its most unwilling. Elias wants only to be free of the tyranny he’s being trained to enforce. He and Laia will soon realize that their destinies are intertwined—and that their choices will change the fate of the Empire itself. (fantasy, young adult, romance)

Circe by Madeline Miller: In the house of Helios, god of the sun and mightiest of the Titans, a daughter is born. But Circe is a strange child—not powerful, like her father, nor viciously alluring like her mother. Turning to the world of mortals for companionship, she discovers that she does possess power—the power of witchcraft, which can transform rivals into monsters and menace the gods themselves. (mythology, fantasy)

Deathless by Catherynne M. Valente: Koschei the Deathless is to Russian folklore what devils or wicked witches are to European culture: a menacing, evil figure; the villain of countless stories which have been passed on through story and text for generations. Deathless lights up like fire as the young Marya Morevna transforms from a clever child of the revolution, to Koschei’s beautiful bride, to his eventual undoing. All told, Deathless is a collision of magical history and actual history, of revolution and mythology, of love and death, which will bring Russian myth back to life in a stunning new incarnation. (fantasy, historical fiction, mythology)

Defy by Sara B. Larson: Alexa Hollen is a fighter. Forced to disguise herself as a boy and serve in the king’s army, Alex uses her quick wit and fierce sword-fighting skills to earn a spot on the elite prince’s guard. But when a powerful sorcerer sneaks into the palace in the dead of night, even Alex, who is virtually unbeatable, can’t prevent him from abducting her, her fellow guard and friend Rylan, and Prince Damian. With hidden foes lurking around every corner, is Alex strong enough to save herself and the kingdom she’s sworn to protect? (fantasy, young adult, romance)

Graceling by Kristin Cashore: Katsa has been able to kill a man with her bare hands since she was eight—she’s a Graceling, one of the rare people in her land born with an extreme skill. As niece of the king, she should be able to live a life of privilege, but Graced as she is with killing, she is forced to work as the king’s thug. (fantasy, young adult, romance)

Grave Mercy by Robin LaFevers: Seventeen-year-old Ismae escapes from the brutality of an arranged marriage into the sanctuary of the convent of St. Mortain, where the sisters still serve the gods of old. Here she learns that the god of Death Himself has blessed her with dangerous gifts—and a violent destiny. If she chooses to stay at the convent, she will be trained as an assassin and serve as a handmaiden to Death. To claim her new life, she must destroy the lives of others. (fantasy, young adult, romance, historical)

Hunted by Meagan Spooner: Beauty knows the Beast’s forest in her bones—and in her blood. She knows that the forest holds secrets and that her father is the only hunter who’s ever come close to discovering them. But Yeva’s father’s misfortune may have cost him his mind, and when he goes missing in the woods, Yeva sets her sights on one prey: the creature he’d been obsessively tracking just before his disappearance. Deaf to her sisters’ protests, Yeva hunts this strange Beast back into his own territory—a cursed valley, a ruined castle, and a world of creatures that Yeva’s only heard about in fairy tales. (fantasy, young adult, romance)

Night Circus by Erin Morgenstern: The circus arrives without warning. No announcements precede it. It is simply there, when yesterday it was not. Within the black-and-white striped canvas tents is an utterly unique experience full of breathtaking amazements. It is called Le Cirque des Rêves, and it is only open at night. But behind the scenes, a fierce competition is underway—a duel between two young magicians, Celia and Marco, who have been trained since childhood expressly for this purpose by their mercurial instructors. Unbeknownst to them, this is a game in which only one can be left standing, and the circus is but the stage for a remarkable battle of imagination and will. (fantasy, fiction, romance)

Red Winter by Annette Mari: Emi is the kamigakari. In a few short months, her life as a mortal will end and her new existence as the human host of a goddess will begin. Shiro is a yokai, a spirit of the earth, an enemy of the goddess Emi will soon host. But she saved his life, and until his debt is paid, he is hers to command-whether she wants him or not. On the day they meet, everything Emi believes comes undone, swept away like snow upon the winter wind. For the first time, she wants to change her fate-but how can she erase a destiny already wrought in stone? Against the power of the gods, Shiro is her only hope… and hope is all she has left. (fantasy, young adult, mythology, romance)

Shadow and Bone by Leigh Bardugo: Alina Starkov has never been good at anything. But when her regiment is attacked on the Fold and her best friend is brutally injured, Alina reveals a dormant power that saves his life—a power that could be the key to setting her war-ravaged country free. Wrenched from everything she knows, Alina is whisked away to the royal court to be trained as a member of the Grisha, the magical elite led by the mysterious Darkling. (fantasy, young adult, romance)

Shatter Me by Tahereh Mafi: Juliette hasn’t touched anyone in exactly 264 days. The last time she did, it was an accident, but The Reestablishment locked her up for murder. The Reestablishment said their way was the only way to fix things, so they threw Juliette in a cell. Now so many people are dead that the survivors are whispering war – and The Reestablishment has changed its mind. Maybe Juliette is more than a tortured soul stuffed into a poisonous body. Maybe she’s exactly what they need right now. Juliette has to make a choice: Be a weapon. Or be a warrior. (young adult, dystopian, romance)

Strange the Dreamer by Laini Taylor: The dream chooses the dreamer, not the other way around—and Lazlo Strange, war orphan and junior librarian, has always feared that his dream chose poorly. Since he was five years old he’s been obsessed with the mythic lost city of Weep, but it would take someone bolder than he to cross half the world in search of it. Then a stunning opportunity presents itself, in the person of a hero called the Godslayer and a band of legendary warriors, and he has to seize his chance or lose his dream forever. (fantasy, young adult, romance)

The Cruel Prince by Holly Black: Jude was seven when her parents were murdered and she and her two sisters were stolen away to live in the treacherous High Court of Faerie. Ten years later, Jude wants nothing more than to belong there, despite her mortality. But many of the fey despise humans. Especially Prince Cardan, the youngest and wickedest son of the High King. To win a place at the Court, she must defy him–and face the consequences. (fantasy, young adult)

The Girl of Fire and Thorns by Rae Carson: Elisa is the chosen one. But she is also the younger of two princesses, the one who has never done anything remarkable. She can’t see how she ever will. Elisa could be everything to those who need her most. If the prophecy is fulfilled. If she finds the power deep within herself. If she doesn’t die young. (fantasy, young adult)

The Girl Who Never Was by Skylar Dorset: The Girl Who Never Was is the story of Selkie Stewart, who thinks she’s a totally normal teenager growing up in Boston. Sure, her father is in an insane asylum, her mother left her on his doorstep—literally—when she was a baby, and she’s being raised by two ancient aunts who spend their time hunting gnomes in their Beacon Hill townhouse. But other than that her life is totally normal! She’s got an adventurous best friend who’s always got her back and an unrequited crush on an older boy named Ben. Just like any other teenager, right? (fantasy, young adult, paranormal)

Twilight by Stephenie Meyer: Isabella Swan’s move to Forks, a small, perpetually rainy town in Washington, could have been the most boring move she ever made. But once she meets the mysterious and alluring Edward Cullen, Isabella’s life takes a thrilling and terrifying turn. Up until now, Edward has managed to keep his vampire identity a secret in the small community he lives in, but now nobody is safe, especially Isabella, the person Edward holds most dear. (young adult, fantasy, romance, paranormal)

I hope this helps!

♡ Lauren

[izayoichan]

Back at Rylan’s work.

River looks at Rylan carefully and reaches for the bag, taking out some painkillers for Rylan

“You don't have to do it if you don't feel up for it. I will  do what you decide. If you want to go home and rest it's okay.” “I would like to do it.. I mean.. imagine living with someone like Carl, being trapped in a relationship with someone that abuses you.. If these bruises can help one person get help, then me being in a little pain and being tired is worth it..”

He takes the painkillers from River, swallowing them with some of the soda. 

“Using this to help someone.. it feels good somehow.. “

Annette watches them, smiling at Rylan's words, but not interrupting them talking.

“Alright, then you can count on me. But if he gets tired or I see it's too much, I'll pull him off the shoot. Just for now, I don't want him overexerting himself... But if it's a few simple ones, hopefully there won't be many troubles.” “Agreed, at any time if it is too much, just call stop. I'll have Marie and Madelene do the shot with you.”

She looks at River. 

“And we will portray you as the one that helps, not an attacker, so you know.”

She stands up, and opens the door getting Marie's attention, telling her the plan.

“Thank you.. “

He looks at River and then at Annette, happy that he hasn't just set River up as a bad guy.

“Oh... Okay. Good to know.” “Let's see if we can get this done then, while I am still drugged down enough.”

He chuckles, his hand resting over River's. 

“When you're ready, just come down to the shooting area, I'll set up a small changing space for you. It won't be anything fancy, and mostly in your current clothes.”

Marie Smiles and walks off to prepare everything, waving at Madelene who nods, finishing up the shoot she is doing.

“Okay, I think we're ready to do this then…”

River gets up and helps Rylan up, letting him find his balance, noticing he feels a little wobbly. When he is sure he has found his balance, he leads him to the area where Marie is waiting. 

“You can sit there for a bit Rylan.” 

She motioned to a sofa, which River helps him over too, smiling softly at Rylan. 

“Since this shoot is too…” “Show off the bruises.. I know.” “Yes, we’ll only need some makeup on you, River.” “Okay, so makeup on me. I can deal with some makeup... “

He moves over to the chair, letting them put makeup on him, Rylan just watching them as Madelene sits down next to him, having some pose suggestions. 

Beginning - Previous - Next

[rubiesintherough]

honestly, though?  so many of my muses need to have someone actually help them face / process their trauma... i mean: 

( warning, this is full of triggers )

aedus:   the fact that he still hasn’t fully been able to move on from samuel’s death, because for the past couple centuries, he was too angry, and too broken to even talk about him for more than a short while. Just clung to the watch. 

cassie:  and with her... she’s facing new trauma  every single day in terms of abuse. Very violent, life-threatening abuse. And has no one she can talk to about it, because even the regulars who come into the bar --- while, yes, she considers them friends and they do care about her --- know better than to stick their noses into it and intervene

dustin:  then there’s this ghost who still has such terrible ptsd revolving around his death that he’s been drifting through the park for 30 years and has only ever managed to go near the lake if it’s to coax away some kid who’s getting too close to the water ‘cause their parents aren’t looking... and then he gets the hell away from there as fast as he can. And even in his revived!verse?  The feeling of water on his skin, even in a bath or shower, is enough to send him into a panic... 

fayne: and this ballerina though, even though there’s never been one single, traumatizing moment in her life that she’d call as such, there’s definitely been enough anxiety, depression, stress, and neglect that she felt she had no choice but to turn to very, very unhealthy coping mechanisms just so she doesn’t commit suicide... though, there is a part of her that knows she chose those specific mechanisms because there’s a good chance they’ll lead to her death, she just doesn’t want to openly admit to that. 

isabella: she lost both her husband and her infant daughter in the span of 24 hours. And wasn’t able to even mention their names without breaking down in tears for over fifty years... she never spoke to anyone about them, because she couldn’t for so long. And now, no one in her life even knows they existed. But, she still goes back to that old, overgrown cemetery to bring them flowers every single year because she feels like she can’t move on. That moving on would betray them somehow.

mahia: ............ i don’t even know where to begin with the amount of trauma mahia carries. Deaths, essentially kidnapping, torture, having her sense of self stripped away, burying her family and friends, having to adjust to an entirely new world, being hunted, living every single day in fear because there are people actually trying to kill her, having to cope with the possibility that the deities she’s spent years praying to don’t exist or have fully turned their backs on her and struggling to deal with the absolute feeling of hopelessness and loneliness that comes with that?   Nightmares. Panic attacks. The terrifying thought that if she lets someone close, she’ll get them killed. She is beyond broken. . 

rylan:  he took a lot of lives while serving Novis. He made a lot of mistakes that he’s trying to make up for. He saw a lot of war, a lot of death... lost a lot of friends during his time in the military. And he refuses to talk about any of it. He deflects. He uses humor. He does his best to distract the other person from the issue at hand and hopes they forget about it. Because he doesn’t want anyone else to know just how terrible of a man he used to be. It scares him. It’s why he keeps running, trying to put as much distance between himself and the Belt as possible. But, he really does need to open up. He still remembers the names of every person he killed, he knows his exact kill count... and he won’t let himself forget. Which, no, he shouldn’t. He did a lot of bad. He caused a lot of pain. But, he’s trying to damn hard to do better. He’s trying not to be that soldier. He WANTS to be better than that. But, to start with... he needs to be honest about it all and actually tell someone. 

trent:   like fayne, there’s never been one singular traumatic event that he’d label as such. But, this guy’s been through the wringer. And he’s not   a l l o w e d   to break or show any weakness... because he doesn’t want Greyson to see it. He knows his son views him as this superhero. And Trent really wants to live up to that. So, he shoves everything down. Never cries in front of him. Always smiling, joking, doing his best to be the strongest, best dad he can be. But, in doing so, completely disregards the fact that he really does need to sit down with someone and talk things through. Though, that can be hard, too. Hard to find a therapist he can really open up to, considering he’s a vigilante who can, you know, throw people and stop bullets with his mind

vivian:  i don’t think she’s ever even mentioned Damien, her brother. Even though his death was what prompted her parents to flip out and start pushing the other kids to be better, perfect, hunters. While she wouldn’t call it abuse, her parents definitely weren’t great... shoving her out into the field to face monsters and ghouls from a very young age, no matter how scared she was, no matter how unprepared she felt. The fact she got attacked by a vampire  --- and, might I add, got in serious trouble for being attacked, because she  ‘ should’ve known what to do ‘ --- and still has a crippling fear  ( not to mention the scars )   from that encounter... fear bad enough she can’t even take a case if there’s a chance a vampire will be involved, she has to find another hunter and hand it over.