#but I'm still mad. and I think that's allowed

[chrisbesitos]

"isn't that 'bunny'?"

matt frowns his eyebrows, tilting his head and narrowing his eyes to see better the picture chris is showing him on his phone. it's impossible, because she told matt earlier she'll spend the whole night studying for a test and plus she'll never go to a party without him — or without telling him —. once he realizes, he widen his eyes. it was her, his bunny.

"she's – are she for real? she said she'll study tonight." matt says, biting his underlip and swiping his fingers on his hair. he scrunches his nose, lifting his body from the couch and looking for car keys at the coffee table. chris frowns his eyebrows, looking at matt walking to the door, he lifts too.

"where are you going?" chris asks.

matt didn't answer, he just slammed the door. he's not exactly mad at you, but he's not okay with the fact you're at a party at the frat house his frat totally hates. so, if you think he's gonna let you stay there after lying to him, you're totally wrong. he drives to the house, climbing out of the car after park in the front of their place. he walks inside, looking for you like a hunter looks for his prey. pushing people from his way, you better not being with one of the frat bros from this house.

he finds you sitting outside in the backyard, your friends with you and he. matt takes a deep breath, scrunching his nose angrily, trying to not make a scene. he walks towards you, he wants to smile at your cute outfit, most of the girls are wearing tiny dresses, but you are sitting there wearing your superheroes shirt and leg warmers, you swipe your glass in your nose. your face drop when you see matt walking in your direction, his jaw clenched, visible angry. you shouldn't have lied to him, but your friend convinced you to do it, knowing matt would never let you go to this party. even though matt doesn't have to allow you go to anywhere.

"what are you doing here?" matt says, you roll your eyes, crossing your arms against your chest. matt is making a scene. your friends stare at you and him, you shrank embarrassed. "you're supposed to be studying in your dorm."

"you're not my babysitter, matt. stop." you say, lifting from the bank and pushing matt by the chest to talk more privately. matt sniffles, smelling you like an animal, feeling the smell of alcohol in your mouth. first you lie, then you drink, all of this without saying anything to him.

"you told me you would be studying, i believed you! you know i don't like these guys." matt groans, grabbing your chin to analyze your face. especially your eyes. at least you're not on drugs, he doesn't trust anyone at this party. "you're drunk, are you serious, huh?"

"i'm not, i just had a couple drinks." you sigh, rubbing your temple. you're not drunk, just a little bit. you don't drink normally, but your friends convince you to drink a bit tonight. "please, go. you're embarrassing me."

"i'm embarrassing you? are you hearing yourself?" matt laughs sarcastically, swiping his fingers along his hair. you sigh again, looking back to stare at your friends, of course they're watching your argument with matt and this is really embarrassing, because they're gonna tell everyone on campus. "let's go, bunny." he says, grabbing your arm.

"i'm not going anywhere, matt. go home." you say, trying to make he let you go. one of the guys behind you both walks towards you, matt frowns his eyebrows looking at him, not letting you go.

"she's not going anywhere with you, asshole." he says, now you're frowning your eyebrows. you stop moving and stare at the guy, because you're mad at matt, but he's still your best friend.

"don't call him an asshole, you back off. this is a private conversation." you push his chest, he stares at you angrily, but before he does anything, matt puts himself in front of you. he pushes the guy.

"stay away from her. all of you." matt says, grabbing your arm again and pulling you out of this party. at least he didn't have to carry you to the car, you walk by his side, even though he protects you and you defend him, he's still mad at you for lying. "i'm gonna drop you at your dorm." he snorts, walking to his car. you stand in front of the car door, matt waits for you get in, staring at you. "get in the car, y/n."

"i'm sorry for lying, ok? i know you wouldn't approve." you sigh, crossing your arms, you sit at the highway. matt sighs too, he walks until you and sits by your side, he embraces your shoulders with his arm. "i just wanted to look nice."

"you can look nice without going to parties like that." he groans, you glance at him and he shakes his head, resting his chin in your head. matt worries about you, sometimes you're too naive for this world, he's scared of anyone hurting you while you away from his eyes. that's why he don't like you at rivals frat parties or drinking without him. "i'm sorry for embarrassing you."

"i know you don't regret it." you say, matt laughs nodding. you raise your head and admire matt's eyes, you rest your hand on his cheek, brushing your thumb there. matt smiles softly, his anger for you disappears. "thank you for caring, baby."

"never do that again, i'm not kidding, bunny." matt says, pointing at you, talking seriously. you smile softly, nodding agreeing with him. you lift your chin to put your lips together.

it's okay to kiss, best friends kiss sometimes.

꩜ chérie's notes: i love love love dealer!matt with nerd!reader <33333

taglist ; @lizzymacdonald06 @lushjunkie @sweetreliever @watercolorskyy @ivysturnss @brianna-grace12 @blahbel668 @gabri3la-sturns @unknvhx @pvssychicken @all4l0vee @i4longhairchris @sluttybitchformattsturniolo @sophand4n4 @sturniololetstrip2 @zayluvss @sturnsmia @sofieeeeex @ifwdominicfike @planettori @jetaimevous @leclecwifey16 @mattswifeyx @joclyn240 @voqueflms @pepsicola-pussy @sturnobsessedwh0re @chrissturnioloswifeee @sturniolossss @imonlyhereformattfluff @sturniolosluttt

[ssevenfates]

Buck sat staring at the phone in his hand, a soft sigh leaving his lips. He kept stroking his thumb along the caller ID. The urge to call him was growing strong.

The familiar name stared back at him mockingly. He could still smell him on the pillowcase, taste him in every baked good, hear his laugh, and feel his touch. Buck would find himself reaching out every morning only to be greeted to an empty bed and a pain in his heart that hasn't gone away since the night Tommy walked away.

Buck wanted to believe that he could heal. That he could move on but he couldn't, all he wanted was—

Tommy.

—

Anger filled Tommy's veins. He looked at himself in the mirror. He gripped the edges of his sink and tried to compose himself. He couldn't get the look on Evan's face out of his head.

God, he looked so broken and confused.

Tommy let himself cry when he got home because nobody could hear the sound of his heartbreaking.

His phone buzzed on the counter of his bathroom sink. He glanced at it for a second before answering. He didn't expect much, but the voice that echoed made his heart stop a beat. The world came to a sudden halt for a moment.

"Buck?"

"Did you know that cupcake recipes might be delicious, but they're so frustrating? All the people who claim to have a perfect cupcake recipe are lying."

"Buck, did you call me just to rant about cupcakes? Because I really don't have the time—"

"I baked a cupcake today," There was a second of silence from Evan's side of the line. "I just sat there and stared at it, trying to figure out what went wrong with this cupcake. What did I do that made this cupcake broken? Why isn't it looking the way I want it to? The way I need it to."

"Buck—"

"Then I realised I was missing an ingredient. I kept going, hoping that this little cupcake would somehow become happier and in the end? It just collapsed, leaving me staring at it."

Tommy pressed his back against the wall and slid down it until he was sitting with his back to the wall and his knees to his chest. This wasn't just about the cupcake, and Tommy knew it.

"Jesus, Buck, do you hear yourself?" Tommy's voice cracked, fighting back tears. "You're getting all emotional over a cupcake, but it's not the cupcake you're mad at it."

"I should hate you for walking out on me."

"I know."

"Why can't I hate you, Tommy? Why is it so hard for me to hate you?"

"You know why."

There was a sniffle, Evan was crying. That made Tommy feel worse. He managed to stop himself from allowing a tear to fall.

"I want you to come home, Tommy," Evan was pleading with him. Tommy couldn't allow himself to be vulnerable, not right now. "I just want to know what it's like for you to hold me one last time."

"Ev-Buck, I can't."

"Why can't you? Why the hell can't you?"

"Because I'm messed up in the head. I'm a broken man, and you, you're so beautiful, kind, loving, and I don't deserve that. I don't deserve someone who would walk through fire for me. You need a normal life."

"I don't want normal, I want messed up with you." Buck cried. "Why do you think I've fought this long? Why do you think I didn't push you away when you kissed me for the first time? You even talked to a ghost despite not believing in it. You did it for me."

Tommy couldn't hold back the tears. He put a hand to his mouth to stop any audible sobs that might threaten to come out.

"You've been my entire world for six months, and now I'm supposed to what? Move on as if that didn't mean anything?"

"I don't know how to do this, Buck. I don't know how to allow myself to be wanted."

"Then let me show you," Buck added. "Because I love you so much that it hurts to breathe."

Tommy's breath hitched, "You love me?"

"I love you."

Evan loved Tommy.

Tommy was loved by Evan.

"Say it again."

"I love you, Tommy."

[sparkleboiswagger]

I think it could very well be plausible that if Chuuya died, (please Chuuya please die), Dazai would cry.

Every time I mention the possibility of Dazai crying if Chuuya died, everyone gets mad at me lol. So please let me explain myself. -This is simply my interpretation of Dazai's character, but I'm open to criticism and discussion cuz I think its fun and I like gaining new understandings of characters like that.- Also to preface this, this is my ideal situation of how Chuuya would perma die

I want Chuuya to think Dazai's dead, but the readers know he isnt, so Chuuya goes absolutely apeshit with corruption and Dazai has to watch, unable to get there in time until Chuuya's body dies. By the time Dazai gets there, he's able to turn him back in time for Chuuya to call him an idiot, and then dies in Dazai's arms For the angst, y'know? ANYWAYS

Reason 1: Dazai is a lot more emotionally there than he was when Oda died I know Dazai didn't cry when Oda died. I'm not suggesting Chuuya means more to him than Oda (I think he's important to Dazai for different reasons, not more or less important), but when Dazai was in the mafia he wasn't in a place where he was able to feel emotions. He was completely shut down and emotionless. He's been out of the mafia for 4 years, and though old habits die hard, I think you can reasonably conclude he's allowed himself to feel more. Especially with Atsushi, you can see how he's changed over the seasons. Looking back at the Dark Era is especially chilling because of this. He's found comfort and safety in good people, learned to rely on them, and overall grown "happier"

Reason 2: Dazai is scared right now. I'm fairly certain I've seen more honest expressions on his face in the recent chapters than we have in the whole series /ex Dazai is either not even bothering to hide his emotions, or he's so stressed that he cannot keep the mask up right now. Either way, he's likely scared of losing Atsushi, or Kunikida, or another person he cares about again. Intense negative emotions followed by a loss he likely isn't even considering as possibility very well could make him snap.

Reason 3: Chuuya is the last person still there who was there during the most messed up times of his life. Its not just the death of Chuuya, it would be the compounding effects of everything. Oda is dead. Ango betrayed him. He was Chuuya's safety, the one person who could bring him down and back to reality in a very literal sense, and Chuuya was the same to him, but more in regards to life and his emotions (imo). And if he died from corruption while Dazai watched, he would have failed Chuuya. Reason 4: It would be an interesting way to show his development, if it was written to parallel Oda's death I think if he was able to shed even one tear for Chuuya, it would show how much he'd evolved. More than anything, more than I want him to cry in mourning for Chuuya, I'd like to see him cry in front of Kunikida and Atsushi. Also yes I think Kunikida is coming back, Asagiri cannot commit to a death for the life of him

If the fan theories of Dazai being forced back into the mafia are true, Chuuya's death would just add a layer of cruelty to that. He'd have to go back to where he was before, without any of the people there who helped him through it, after finally finding some semblance of peace and normalcy IN CONCLUSION Am I a bit Soukoku brained? Yeah sure. But thats only a part of why I would like this. Dazai crying would be beautifully devastating, depending on how it was written. I don't necessarily think it would happen in canon, but I don't think its impossible. Also I'm sure theres a lot I misunderstood about Dazai, I've only been analyzing him for a few months and I am admittedly much more obsessed with Chuuya lol, please share your takes unless its just that Dazai doesn't actually care about Chuuya in canon cuz thats a load of bull <3

[stormbabylore]

Ooh, I have a few!

I've an AU in which Aeryn just stops after StB. She is shattered, exhausted, unable to cope, and truly convinced her closeness to the Scions causes them more harm than good. So she walks away. She returns to the Ruby Sea (the first and—at the time—only place she's experienced a true memory of her former life), where Tansui convinces her she is allowed to make selfish choices—she is allowed to stop. Even to stay. Despite never officially joining the Confederacy, Rasho makes an unspoken exception for Aeryn that no one seems to question, especially not considering how useful she makes herself. But emotionally, she is an utter wreck. She tosses her linkpearl into the ocean but frequently has nightmares about receiving desperate calls for help from the Scions. She is haunted by the voice of Hydaelyn and the fear that she has done the wrong thing, but she can't find the courage to abandon her perceived freedom from the bloody, ceaseless struggle she has left behind. She may not be happy, she reasons—she may never feel happy again. But everyone is safer without her, she is sure, and... And she is free.

(Two more "bad ends" behind the cut, but beware: they are EW spoiler-heavy!)

In canon, Aeryn begins losing herself to despair as the Scions, one by one, make their sacrifices in Ultima Thule. The breaking point for her is when Urianger chooses, willingly, to give up his life alongside Y'shtola. But at Urianger's parting behest, G'raha manages to pull Aeryn back from the brink and give her the hope she needs to press on; and when he, too, then goes, she is able to maintain her composure for the twins. That said... I could easily imagine G'raha failing to break through to her, resulting in a bad end. Aeryn would lose herself entirely, willingly releasing herself to Dyanmis to become a blasphemy. G'raha and the twins might try to get through to her, but I don't think she'd have the capacity to hear them any longer and would flee toward the Endsinger's song of despair. Meteion might take pity on her (given their past connection) and attempt to grant a swift end to her strife. But because Aeryn's inner power is so strong, it's more likely that they would fuse into something even stronger than the Endsinger. The sheer magnitude of all their suffering would trigger Aeryn's star magic, which she/they would unleash (as stars do) to bring an abrupt and explosive end to everything—even the Final Days.

Finally, my screenshots from this challenge really got me thinking about what Aeryn would be like as an Ascian. There are several ways she might have gotten to that point. Maybe post-HW, if she found herself in the position assumed in canon by Urianger... or perhaps in ShB, had she managed to manifest her past self's empathic abilities and forged a different connection with Emet-Selch. Truthfully, though, I'm kind of stuck on the idea of her offing Fandaniel (without truly killing the Ascian) and getting sort of possessed by Amon. It would be a split situation in which her soul (plus Azem power plus soul of a literal star) can't be fully controlled, even by the Ascian's methods, so she'd probably be a little bit bonkers. But I think her empathy for Hermes's situation would have made her uniquely suited to an odd kind of soul symbiosis with one of his shards, helping to subdue a little bit of Amon's madness, as well as his desperation to end. In that way it would be a bad end for the WoL, but perhaps not the worst end, story-wise. I could still see Ascian Aeryn working to avert the Final Days: reaching out to Meteion with both her own and Hermes's memories, pushing through the nest to find the Endsinger, even summoning Hades and Hythlodaeus… and possibly even some of the other Ascians? Defeating the Endsinger alongside both Ancients and Ascians would be pretty poetic, all things considered, and so delightfully circular thinking back on ARR. I'm not sure much about the fight itself would change, with Ascian Aeryn finding herself in the odd circumstance of being gifted strength beyond even her means by the prayers of the Scions who don't want to see their friend defeated, perhaps hoping they can somehow bring her back...

(Do I need another AU? No. But I'm a teensy bit obsessed with the notion of EW driving Aeryn to willingly play host to an Ascian... annnnnnd I'll probably end up writing some of this. Oops, I guess? Here we are.)

Bad endings? Bad endings anyone?

What if they got consumed by the light? What if they became a primal? Any and all bad endings!

I think mine most likely would've become a lightwarden because she didn't get to Emet-Selch fast enough. "Obsession" would be its name, due to the fact it would be obsessed with the idea of saving others and changing the world, probably leading to either the Scions killing her or to her consuming the First in Light.

.

[weirdo-with-a-nametag]

I feel like there's so much your parents are supposed to teach you how to do, and mine didn't. Some of it they assumed I already knew (?) Or punished me for not knowing (??) And now I'm out here clueless. There is a lot that I do not feel I have the knowledge or ability to handle. Where is the support you promised?

[lloydfrontera]

in a better timeline where theo is actually a character and not just a plot device he and rakiel develop this weird and confusing dynamic where rakiel is still very clearly theo's older brother except for those moments where his inner ahjussi comes out and he parents theo more than his father ever did and he slowly starts taking asterion's place as theo's father figure.

neither of them really notice because 1) lee han was an only child and he's not really that aware of what is or isn't normal sibling behavior and he doesn't really care either he just sees theo craving approval and being lowkey passively suicidal and goes "is anyone gonna take care of that" and then doesn't wait for an answer before doing it himself and 2) because theo has been neglected his entire life and doesn't recognize what rakiel is doing as 'parenting' because, well, asterion never did that with him so his first experience with that kind of care and treatment is from rakiel so he automatically files it as 'hyung behavior'. so none of them actually realize when their dynamic blurs the line between siblings and parent-child.

but asterion does. just... way too late. when he's already lost his chance with not one, but both of his children. when one son is forever out of his reach and the other has filled what should've been his place with someone else. only then does he realize what his neglect and putting his title as emperor above that of father has cost him. when there's nothing he can do about it.

he wanted his sons to grow up without needing him. and they did. they don't need him anymore. and he didn't realize how terrible of a thing that was until it was far too late to fix it.

[lettersiarrange]

Has time always moved this fast? I'm genuinely asking. In 200 years we went from Bridgerton to AI. The everyday lives of people in each of these eras feel like universes apart. I'm no historian, but it seems like the everyday lives of people between 1500 and 1700 weren't that different.

Have humans throughout time immemorial reflected on life 30 years ago, 100 years ago and commented on how vastly different it was? It feels like we're running at a breakneck pace in the modern era. The It Gets Better project was founded in 2010 because gay people were so universally ostracized that lgbt teen suicide rates were off the charts. And while we're still pretty far from full LGBT equality, openly having a problem with gay people existing is a pretty fringe opinion now that's fairly universally frowned upon, even in the southern US.

I'm pretty sure the first time a woman wore pants in congress was in the 90s.

Culturally, technologically, resource-wise, it feels like every 5 years we leap 5 decades forward. Is it just our own preoccupation with the era we live in that makes this moment feel so significant? Or are we actually moving as quickly as it feels?

I know people have always laughed at the grandpa's who complain "when I was your age...", but has the gap ever been this wide? Or is there truly something special about now.

[dayssinceabrandcrossedmarkiplier]

100 days since a brand crossed Markiplier

29/8/23

(Be careful when reading the tags if you're sensitive to, albeit glancing, references to sexual assault/grooming)

[zimmbzon]

I really want Day to get big mad at everyone.

I want Day to blow up at his Mum and Night and Mhok. I want Day to realise his power and his strength and his right to make his own decisions, to choose his own path, make mistakes, take risks and have secrets.

I want Day to get completely fed up with people using his disability as a way to keep him close, to keep him in check, to keep him reliant on them, to keep him scared.

I want Day to tell them all to get fucked. He might still need assistance with his disability but that doesn't mean he needs THEM. I want Day to up and go stay with Aon.

I want to see the different stages of realisation in Night, Mhok and their mum. Night knows Day is right and he's already acted on this understanding. Their Mum has to know that Day doesn't need her as a carer - she's never home. But Mhok will be oblivious, completely blindsided by Day's words and behaviour.

Mhok who hides from any internal study by focusing on what's outside. He focuses on Day, puts everything into Day. He attaches himself to Day's vulnerability, but he carefully keeps his own vulnerability behind sky high walls.

He kissed Day in a moment of Day's vulnerability, he took strength from it and did the scary thing (but perhaps Mhok's fear was tempered by the imbalance of power that always exists between them). Now Mhok needs to tear down the walls. He needs to make himself more vulnerable than he has ever seen Day. And he has to do it with the knowledge that Day doesn't need him, and Day might not want or choose him. Mhok has relied on his position of power in their relationship, he has keep secrets and made decisions that benefited him whilst telling himself that it was all for Day.

Mhok needs to be scared and alone, he needs to feel the threat of abandonment. He needs to feel like Day did when Mhok pranked him at the beach.

He needs to do the big scary thing, and he needs to do it from a place of powerlessness and respect.

[menspussypowersactivate]

Out of the 287,773 Supernatural fics on Ao3, just 12,817 fics include Jack Kline (203 of them being tagged toddler jack kline or jack kline is metaphorically a baby) and only 105 include him being shipped with canon characters that aren't winkilne or the reader. And most of the time Jack isn't even the main focus! I'm sorry??? Do with that what you will.

[tevatron]

i'm so glad i won't be working with my pi after this month. i think i've reached my limit. i just can't deal with her anymore

[teeth-cable]

I was just thinking how nice it would have been, if in an alternative version of Helluva Boss, Stolas was still a terrible person but he divorced Stella, raised Octavia as a single father but still allowed Octavia to see her mother on weekends and certain holidays because he realized the importance of having two parents around, and Stella was an actually reasonable villain because she keeps trying to ruin Octavia and Stolas's relationship and is running a smear campaign against Stolas.

[goldengodcannibal]

please take me in like i've been taught you known to do

[sskk-manifesto]

(｡･ω･｡)ﾉ♡

[goldentigerfestival]

Yuri's dialogue (JP) is so fascinating to study, like... the repetitive use of certain words/phrases that others use sparingly but he uses constantly. the way it feels like his vocabulary is more expansive than what he uses, but he defaults to a "comfort" level of speech. the way it mixes in with his sort of "street talk" words and the sheer level of informality. the way his "street talk" phrasing is contrasted by the tone of his voice (on that note, people I know who also know JP are also very endeared by these aspects of him so I KNOW IT'S NOT JUST ME!!!).

'cause the thing is, he uses phrases that yeah, other people do use, but he uses a handful over and over and over (contrast to other characters' sparing use of repetition). it's actually... really refreshing? it sounds more relatable and less "video game/anime/JRPG/RPG" writing or something, idk. like closer to how a real person would speak.

I do my best in my translations not to make things sound too stiff across the board, but Yuri makes it so easy. it's why I'm so interested in translating all his lines in Vesperia, like... the actual, original tone for him with his original wording because it's smth Eng only players don't get to experience ('cause even if you listen with JP audio, if you don't know the language, ofc you're gonna miss out on context. it's nobody's fault for not knowing, just... they unfortunately miss out). the thing is, there are a lot of times when the lines in and of themselves are not contextually incorrect in the English ver (usually the situation for smaller scenes, because they altered the text outright for more important stuff which was the stuff that originally set me off, but there were also plenty of cases of just vocal tone shifting with the correct context that still gave off the wrong impression), but Yuri's tone is shifted away from the original in Eng even though it's completely and perfectly translatable.

I am by no means about to translate the entire game because let's face it, I really don't care that much for Vesperia on the whole. I'm kinda stuck with it because Yuri's there lo and behold I actually am WAY more engaged in his stories in Rays, Link and Asteria because it's an amazing character put into circumstances where he actually gets to shine and feels more alive, which Vesperia did not provide nearly as well with its very disjointed story. also, Tales gachas have banger stories that are arguably better than the mainline games, and they regularly make Yuri a very central character to the gachas. Crestoria was also about to do it until they pulled the plug on that game and I'm pretty confident something interesting has been lost to the world. also I just generally don't have the energy or motivation to do that, so... I'll only be focusing on Yuri's lines, especially because his stuff is where the bulk of the messing around was. he's just insanely fun to translate for and I love burying myself head first into his speech.

will I actually finish this project? dunno. will I get around to posting it? whatever I get done (so all of it if I complete it), and if I decide to call it quits then I'll post what I have at the time I decide that. will it take a long time? probably, but I can always mention stuff along the way...

[palossssssand]

A and B for Gingull and Eidwinn? Also I love their designs so much!

For Gingull: A) Why are you excited about this character?

I'm mostly excited about Gingull because they're kind of the culmination/crossroads point that ties all the other characters together, I think it's an interesting point for a character to be in. Admittedly, I've been having a hard time figuring out exactly how Gingull fits/moves the story forward since she's a product of the circumstances. I'm definitely going to be projecting a lot of personal experiences onto her, so there's a catharsis element to her too. I'm also excited to figure out how she interacts with all the other characters, given that she becomes mute at the beginning of the story, and not everyone would know/understand how to communicate with her and the frustration that comes with it. Also going to have so much fun with electrical imagery <:] The other thing I'm mainly excited to think about is her relationship with Delta(sea urchin), the soldier that pulled her from the malfunctioning machine and saved her life. There's going to be some tension between the two because Gingull is in no way obligated to forgive Delta for it, given that Delta was still actively Working for the military, and Delta has her own guilt complex about it as well due to efforts to break from the military and work towards doing some good. It's a dynamic that I don't think I've really seen or know how to describe, but I feel like it's easily the most interesting one to explore in regards to Gingull's character arc.

B) What inspired you to create them?

Gingull was created for the very initial premise of slug city's story, which was "dystopian government project to 'fix' mental illness spawns beasts that are representative of the illness to stigmatize it", like, the trope of an inner self or unwanted traits being a separate entity and character must learn to deal with it, or something. Gingull's beast is a long, wormy thing made of pure elctricity, and the imagery of that came first, and then Gingull's design, and then the story premise. The above description is currently a bit outdated and a little more nuanced, but the core of Gingull's character concept was built from the electrical beast, hence her helmet shaped like a socket. Initially, the idea was that she wore the helmet to cover her face because she's afraid of the disfigurement, and the electrical beast is a manifestation of her desire to be wanted and understood, so there's a moment plotted out in the story where she discards the helmet and the beast goes after the helmet instead of her. This is still partially true, but I've added a layer where the helmet enables her to not need to make eye contact or mouth expression, so there's an element of new comfort from that. Not sure where I'm going to take the previous concept with this, she's definitely a character that I'll need to workshop more in order to flesh out the core of the story.

Sorry for the really awful image quality but I don't think I've ever shared the beast designs before. Here's Gingull's.

For Eidwinn: A) Why are you excited about this character?

I'm really attached to Eidwinn, I'm honestly still not sure where he fits in the story, but he's very charming to me. Not that he's actually charming personality-wise, he's pretty reserved and generally unfriendly, but he's just very enamoring to me. I'm definitely thinking about a moment in story where Gingull goes to him for solace or happens to meet him, I haven't fleshed out those details yet. I'm also waffling on whether he should have prior relationships to the other characters, but he also just feels far removed from them and I think he's good as-is as a character that isn't directly involved in the other character's happenings but is nonetheless affected by them. He's important in Gingull's context because he's someone that's experienced life in a similar way to her, so there's solidarity in that.

B) What inspired you to create them?

I got started with slug city's premise and began making characters that would make cool beast concepts. Eidwinn's thing is that he's a plant shop owner who has a hoarding problem, and instead of doing anything meaningful about it the govt just dragged him to their machines, so his beast is this massive monstrous orchid that's supposed to represent his (debatably) unhealthy attachment to his plants. I haven't exactly decided if the beast manifestations are decided by Other People's perception of their root issues, or if it's a self-imposed idea, or a combination of both, because each implies something different about the nature of the beasts and how the characters interact with them. There's definitely a sense of shame associated with them, especially in Eidwinn's case where the beast roaming around causes him to be more shut in than before. In any case, I just really liked the concept of his character so he's stuck around. I needed characters that weren't direct players in the story.

also I know I probably could have typed thought up in The Text Post but additional thoughts always get put in the tags and I'm not going to bother retyping them. it's about the vibe of rambling in the tags <3 here's my post-post thoughts:

list of slug city characters question list