#but I’m thinking about the choices I’ve made

[maudie-duan]

First Series!!!

Series Summary: For nearly two years, Harry has been fighting to keep his relationship with Olivia afloat. At what point does he make the choice to either endure or let the stain of the world defeat his ambitious hopes of a lasting relationship? Or will a single night and a fleeting encounter be enough to change the projection of Harry’s path? Maybe our ‘Mystery Girl,’ Shiloh, will just happen to be in the right place at the right time. 

A/N: You guys, this is my first series; bear with me. In no way, shape, or form is this meant to follow Harry’s actual life, nor are the facts or timelines real. This story will be from Harry and Shiloh’s POVs. I like switching between them. I’m nosy, and you get more details this way. So, if you like details, you���re in the right place. This story will be a slow burn, so hold tight. I’m glad you’re here!!! ENJOY!!!!

Word Count: 2K

Warning: Strong language, minor angst, eventual smut, emotional.

Harry’s (POV) Part 1- Mystery Girl

***

I don’t usually think of how my relationships will end, but I’ve been thinking about our ending—the consequence of our beginning looming over our heads as if it were a pleading prayer whispered into the night. When “I love you” no longer sufficed, the emptiness stretched between us and how fickle we were. How we continued seeking tiny moments, desperate to fill that void—A revolving door of new faces and places where we lay tucked away, pressing our bodies together like puzzle pieces, hoping that one day they would fit together—indefinitely.

Surely, we knew this wasn’t going to work, right? From the beginning, we’ve been on two different parallels, trying to make this work, trying to force a path through murky water when neither one of us knew when or how the tide would roll in—and here I am, miserable out of my fucking mind. In a shit headspace just waiting for this evening to end because there’s nothing worse than getting into a massive blowout right before an event. I can’t figure out what’s worse, the fight or the forced niceties. The last place I wanted to be was in public, but this is my life.

Olivia was on about something—actually, I don’t even remember what the fight was about this time, and that’s what it’s been lately. These bullshit fights about petty, senseless matters that take more energy to create than they do to fix. It’s just that she’s gotten so jealous and paranoid that I’m growing distant, that she’s the only one fighting to be in this relationship, and maybe she’s right.

—Side note: Before tonight, I really hadn’t been interested in anyone. Honest to god, I was truly in this wholeheartedly.

Anyone who knows me knows I’m constantly in the public eye, even if I think I’m lying low. There’s always a chance that someone will recognize me. The chances of someone taking a picture are even greater because everyone needs proof, or it didn’t happen, right? I personally don’t believe in this—but to each their own—If you know me and who I am, that’s precisely what you get. She knew this when we met, yet she insists that every move I make is for the world, like I can’t comprehend all of the sacrifices that she has made to be with me. Trust me, I know, and as of late, she’s taken every opportunity to throw it back in my face. 

In all honesty, I know that relationships take work, but isn’t there supposed to be balance? Somewhere along the way, we’ve lost that. We both jumped in feet first and now life seems to be catching up even faster—the constant push and pull in every direction is getting old. Everyone wants something, and she wants the most. It’s like she doesn’t understand the sacrifices that I’ve made. It’s not easy being the world’s biggest pop star and falling in love, but I felt she was worth it at the time.

And now she wants more—Roots that I can’t seem to give her. It’s like I’ve only just begun to find my own footing, stepping into the skin that finally feels right, that’s mine, and she wants nothing to do with it—She wants the control. She wants me to align with whatever she thinks our life should be.

I mean, I get it. I understand wanting the security of always knowing your next move or having a better grasp, but surely Olivia knew what she was getting herself into. It can’t be this big surprise that our life together isn’t panning out into what she had imagined, and the shittest part about it is that I don’t even want to try anymore. I don’t want the things that Olivia is trying to project onto me with every fight that ends with her begging me to choose her—is that not what I’ve been doing this whole time?

I’m lost in thought when Olivia whispers something into my ear. She had gone on and on about this Gucci Cruise show and was pissed when I decided I didn’t want to sit front row. I didn’t want to distract from the show or draw unwanted attention. Especially after that fight—God, that stupid fucking fight that left her in tears, her makeup a wet smear all over her face, almost making us late. 

Tonight was supposed to be memorable. How many people get the chance to attend a Gucci show? This was my first. It’s an honor that I wanted to appreciate and take in with the gratitude I feel not only for the brand but also for the friends I’ve grown quite close to.

“I just feel like the whole point of coming to a fashion show is to sit in with the audience and have a genuine experience of the clothes and the people—” Her comment is pointed and sets me off, so I do the asshole thing and walk toward someone I know leaving her alone with her underhanded comment.

Eventually, I walk over to the edge of the curtain, peering out into the crowd, trying to pinpoint faces I’ll see later, making a list of people I want to see or possibly avoid. As I skim the front row, my eyes land on a woman who looks vaguely familiar. Still, I can’t put a finger on it. She sticks out like a sore thumb. For instance, she is one of the few wearing dark sunglasses in a dimly lit room. Making her stand out in all black, except for the few accents that set her apart from everyone else around her, who are dripping with vibrant colors, something you would expect at a Gucci show—wild statement pieces, different patterns, and textures that ebb and flow amongst each other.

She was magnetic in a way that made it hard for me to look away. The light played off her features, creating a soft aura. A delicate ray of pink traced a faint glow around her. I couldn’t tell if it was an illusion or a trick of the mind in my rose-colored glasses. When I lowered my frames to get a clearer view, I found that she was just as stunning without them—and still, to this day, I can’t explain the feeling; it was like my soul took the lead, reaching out, hoping to find a tether. A single piece of thread that could tie me to her.

And there I stood, my mind spinning out of control. I don’t even know how long I stood there. How long I continued watching her, captivated by how the light seemed to dance with the shadows every time a model passed in front of her. Another thing I noticed was her ruby-red lip. How they spread into a shy smile, the light catching the gleam of her white teeth—a sight I imagined could be seen from anywhere in the room if you were fortunate enough to catch it. I observed her as she straightened upright and crossed her legs, almost as if she had suddenly become aware of her surroundings. Was she nervous? 

Her hair was slicked back into a sleek bun, tight against her scalp, making her features more pronounced and giving her a tidier appearance than everyone else. This timeless look could set anyone apart from the crowd, but what really caught my eye was the gilded chain dress that hugged her all-black attire underneath. I wanted to see her stand up. I wanted to know how the light played off the delicate beads draped from the woven metal. I wondered if it was uncomfortable for her or if she realized she stood out more than the celebrities around her. She had to be someone important, right? Not just anyone can sit front row at a Gucci show—Who is she?

As if she sensed my gaze, her head abruptly turned toward the curtains, causing me to jump back and bump into Olivia. “What the hell?” I hissed. 

Olivia stepped back, eyes wide, my words landing with a bite. I thought, “fuck is she about to make a scene?”—and yes, the bitterness was unnecessary, but it came more from defense than anger. I didn’t want to be found out. What was I doing anyway? How long had she been standing there? Could she see what I was looking at? Or could I pretend that I was trying to get a better view of the show, which was technically true, right?

“Can we please start over tonight?” she asks, almost pleading. “I know tonight is special for you.” Olivia runs her hands up my chest and cups my face.

“Okay…” I exhale. I want to have a good time, but a part of me knows I would enjoy myself more without her here, and it’s this very feeling that will haunt me all night, my thoughts like demons filling the room—unwanted guests that I’m no longer sure I want to keep at bay, and I know this isn’t fair. 

I couldn’t tell if it was the afterparty or the drinks that came with it, but eventually, the mind fog that plagued me throughout the evening began to lift. It was like a breath of fresh air, each drink diluting the pressure; the animosity threaded into every conversation Olivia and I had was evaporating. I could let go of the stress and relax into the theme of the night—and that was to have fun and fucking enjoy myself because I work hard, dammit.

It was getting easier to play into Olivia’s game of putting on for the coward. This was the part she liked; she loved putting on in a room full of people. She fucking thrived on the attention—she loved wearing me like a glove she could take on and off whenever she pleased. 

I was already three drinks in when I spotted my “mystery girl.” It surprised me—she was much shorter than I had imagined, but something was compelling about her presence. When she finally looked my way, I instinctively put my arm around Olivia, feeding into the lie, feeling like a fool when her eyes flitted over me with no recognition, piercing my ego in one swift look. I didn’t know what I thought would happen…actually, I’ll tell you exactly what I thought would happen. I thought my presence alone would be enough to garner her attention. Instead, I stood there stunned when her eyes lingered on Olivia, sending her a friendly smile as she mouthed the words, “I love your dress.” pulling at the strap of her dress to drive her compliment home.

Astonished, I stood by, holding my breath as the transaction morphed into Olivia mouthing a returned compliment, making ‘Mystery Girl’ beam and my chest swell with jealousy as she turned away, not even sparing me a second glance. She moved through the room effortlessly, like a hummingbird, moving from flower to flower fast yet graceful, donning that beautiful smile that had me begging her to look my way—just one more time. That’s all I would need. 

Was she a journalist? It seemed like everyone knew who she was. She spoke to everyone she encountered with such ease that each conversation I noticed flowed as if they were friends—though perhaps they were, but how was I to know? At some point, I lost her in the night, or maybe I knew I had to release her from my thoughts. I wanted to end the night on a high note, not go home with a suspecting partner to whom I would have to explain myself later. 

So, by drink five, I was being pulled onto the stage with Stevie, duetting a few songs, and as I closed my eyes, singing out the lines:

Oh, mirror in the sky, what is love?

Can the child within my heart rise above? 

Can I sail through the changin’ ocean tides?

Can I handle the seasons of my life?

I opened my eyes as we swayed into the chorus, browsing the crowd. My gaze locked with Olivia’s, who was crying, tears streaming down her face, a pained look of grief stealing her features. We shared a look of understanding. Maybe even realization, but it hit me hard, the sadness creeping up my spine as she turned and moved away from the crowd, and I noticed her bump into Alessandro, who caught her by the arm with a concerned look on his face. I pulled away from the microphone, my voice choking up, and I let Stevie take over. We both knew that our world was crumbling right before our eyes and when I glanced back over, searching for Olivia, she was gone. 

A/N: Ya'll let me know in the comments what you think. I'd love to get your feedback. If you think I should continue?? Hope you guys enjoyed!

[o-wild-west-wind]

While I’m still a bit bummed that they didn’t go with a more book-aligned POC Fiyero for the Wicked movie, I’ve been thinking (heheh) about how his being white highlights the really interesting foil relationship between him and Glinda (and, in many ways, the audience yourself).

At its core, Wicked is a cautionary tale about propaganda, (literal) scapegoating, and what it means to uphold the status quo. The audience is watching through Glinda’s eyes—it is through her, arguably the most beautifully tragic character of the show, that we learn how lonely life becomes when you forfeit your values in favor of systemic power and likability (“No One Mourns the Wicked” is, in many ways, about HER).

Now, this is where Fiyero’s whiteness can get interesting—if you consider him and Glinda to share roughly equal footing at the beginning in terms of privilege/how much they have to lose (applying our real-world lens of race and power here, where whiteness is the apex), his storyline essentially represents what could have happened if Glinda had made the brave (and arguably wise and loving, if you’re picking up what I’m putting down 👀) choice to go with Elphaba and fight the good fight (this is also why I feel like a queer reading of G&E’s relationship is almost implicit to the story, but I digress).

As the POC/marginalized allegory, Elphaba has much less of a real choice in her curtain-pulled-back turning point. But Fiyero and Glinda—both representing privilege—get to choose. So in Act II, we see the consequences of both the choice to stay (Glinda) and to go (Fiyero). In Fiyero’s case, his ultimate rejection of his own power, privilege, and even beauty leads to immense physical loss—including his own body—but that is then compared to the loss of love, community, and identity that we see Glinda left with by the end. And this brings us to the question that the audience is left grappling with: in an unjust system where loss is inevitable (a.k.a. our own world, as the Wizard himself represents), which of these things are YOU more willing to give up?

It’s important that Glinda is an empathetic character because, in reality, most people are going to be Glindas (obvi this is nuanced among us Elphabas of marginalized identities, but I’d still argue that there’s some level of Glinda in us all)—and it’s important to be rattled by the end of the show when you realize that she is the one who has the sad ending. But it’s also so important that Fiyero is empathetic (which I’m SO glad this movie leaned into)—because he’s ultimately who Glinda—and thus we, as the audience—should have been.

And especially given the state of US politics right now…this is just all more relevant than ever.

[virtues-end]

So I’ve got a thought, and you don’t have to tell me which of which is right, if it is at all, but

Shea knew MC before they were a helvling, and I always just kind of took that at face value.

Like it could be anything, childhood friends, living in the same village at some point, meeting through mutual friends, etc. It seemed less important how, and more important that it happened at all.

But then it’s occurred to me, what a foolish take.

Shea’s being in the occupation that they are, is important.

MC being able to have to have such emotions about things and certain organizations and it not being a fixed detail, is important. (I understand that it could just be the general set up and I’m looking too hard, but this doesn’t come across like the usual flavor text to me).

And then I was thinking the chances of them meeting really young feel closer to zero than not because Elex doesn’t seem to know us (obviously this could be false but I think there would’ve been something more complicated to their processing of us past the curiosity they feel if it was otherwise)

So I was like, where do adults meet other adults often enough to get to know each other in a setting where picking up and simply moving isn’t a readily available choice for most people?

And how poetic would it be if MC used to be a Keeper/was going to become one and that’s how they met before it all went to shit. How much weird sense would it make, in equal measure, any super negative or positive opinion that MC had about the situation/thumb they’re under now, not knowing it was the same before thumb. Even if it’s the same opinion or different from before. And sure it can absolutely be important to the now or even just flavor text but it doesn’t really feel like it.

Shea came to kill us and couldn’t.

And Shea doesn’t usually come across like someone who can’t follow through, so I have my doubts of it being a simple acquaintanceship. This is at least camaraderie or respect (and Shea being chosen to do this screams test btw, like of all the people to choose).

It feels like Shea only could make that decision because of who their father is, but also like they definitely didn’t get away with it per se.

Which, if I’m right, that conversation between the Shea and their father takes on double meaning and weight.

Because that means physically othering us, despite knowing and having proof who we were prior in a much more personal way and giving that disgust/disappointment he feels in Shea not being able to do the same a more tangible weight.

Even if all of this is an extraordinarily wrong reach, it does feel like Shea feels guilty.

Like they wonder if they made the right choice binding us again and not killing us. Not because they want us dead but because they would never know if that was what we’d want before changing air even necessarily after. They feel like someone who would label that action, taking that liberty, as selfish.

Well, my lips are sealed, obviously... But thank you for sending me your thoughts! :-) It's so fascinating to see how people might interpret things.

[elleah]

My ex of two months feels like a stranger to me. I can’t even imagine us back together. Our relationship feels like an illusion, as if it never happened. When I think of him, I feel disgusted. I don’t like his traits. He was controlling, but in a subtle way—so subtle that it made me question myself, wondering, “Why do I feel so humiliated, criticized, and rejected? He didn’t even say anything bad.” It was like that.

I left him, and I feel better now. I feel like I have control. I have maintained no contact and ignored his happy birthday text. I’ve unsubscribed from everything connected to him and feel no attachment to him anymore (I think I lost attachment to him gradually while we were still together). However, I still think about him sometimes, and he even appears in my dreams.

I realize I’m still a bit vulnerable, especially as I process how much he disrespected me. But I know these feelings will fade with time, and I’m allowing myself the space to heal. I want other women to trust their intuition and learn from my mistakes, though I understand that every woman has her own life and must make her own choices.

[water-lemon-alex]

objects in mirror.

inanimate insanity s2, episode 18.

(sequel to my “through no choice of “their” own” art.)

The end result of Inanimate Insanovember! Thank you for sticking with me on this journey!

I drew EVERY SINGLE CONTESTANT (and i hope i didn’t forget ANY) including our co-hosts and our very own MePhone4!

( VERSION 2 BELOW ; II18 SPOILERS ) + my special message!

I’ve known Inanimate Insanity since around 2021? Around the same year when I discovered BFDI. I got introduced to it because a lot of people in the BFDI community talks about the show, so I watched it for myself. And boy, I enjoyed it!

I was around when Hatching the Plan recently came out, and it looked great, so I watched it from the start. I was around during II’s 10th anniversary celebration; including the start of Season 3! So I watched most of the Invitational episodes when they first released.

But then I took a break from the fandom after Friend or Froze’s release, you know how stuff happened in the fandom during that time…Until one day, I got a lot of posts in my feed about the II movie, and the events of II16. When I heard my favorite character in the show (OJ) literally DIED, I HAD to go rewatch the whole show!

I binge-watched II up until II16, caught up with Invitational— things were wild. Listening to Taco’s Tirade for the first time (where I didn’t know it would become my favorite song), watching the entirety of II16 and finding out the big reveal…

Then I decided to draw some art for the show, and it got really popular! So I drew more, and they gained lots of traction. I took a liking for Season 1’s final four— OJ, Paper, Pickle and Taco! I gave them a cool name— the Menu Squad! Made headcanon designs for them, memes, doodles, everything. Just to show my love for them. Heck, I called myself the “Self-Proclaimed Menu Squad CEO”.

Then a cool AU idea appeared in my head before II17 released: the Welcome to Insanity survival AU! It was inspired by some lines from II16, then my intro post to the AU gained A LOT OF NOTES and it made me so happy when I found out people were INSPIRED by my AU! And so I drew more, and more, and now I’m here.

This community is full of wonderful creators big and small. I’m still really proud on how far we’ve come! I think there’s no other object show that could bring me such a wild experience! So thank you for all your support! And thank you to the II team for making this possible! I enjoyed the finale so much!

- With love, Lemi. 🍉🍋

[lewis-just-lewis]

Hello Viktor enjoyers I make my return..I have thoughts about this latest season. Before getting into full criticism, huge props to the artistic talent that worked on this show. Fortiche as a whole has genuinely changed tv animation, the combination of 2D and watercolor sequences-the super stylized music and fight scenes, absolutely thee best animation I think I’ve ever witnessed. The music, the art, the animation-even the character designs. While I don’t care for certain choices, the designs have so much artistic talent put into them. I adore cosmic horror, and to see that utilized was very cool!

To see the character it was used for, I have thoughts on. But I enjoyed the design as it was-the writing on the other hand..I’m upset with.

Admittedly, the first watch through I had was pure adrenaline. I went into this season with two things I wanted. I wanted to see Viktor evolve closer to his league self, and I wanted to see what route Sevika and Jinx would take-whether that path be together or as individuals, I wanted to see how they helped Zaun. And technically, in a way, I got what a wanted..for a moment.

There was a rumor in circulation, that arcane was meant to be five season long. I genuinely believe this wasn’t a rumor now. There was so much missing, there were so many interactions that were needed to feel this story the way it was felt in season 1. With everyone, but primarily with Viktor and Jayce. There’s that rebuttal old as season one that goes: “Arcane is meant to be about the sisters!”

Okay, how did the sisters mend their connection? Did they ever talk about it-the fact that Vi made Jinx-or how Vi committed chemical warfare on people-HER people?? Additionally, if Viktor was meant to always be the big bad we absolutely needed more time with him!! We needed to see the wedge driven between him and Jayce, to see when that good intent took a turn to the extreme. We needed to see him have more interactions with different characters-or expand further upon his already existing relationships!

There were seeds planted that the writers completely forgot about and let decay in dried up soil. In act 3 of season 1, Viktor starts getting snippy-and then outright mad at the people around him. Someone on here did address that, Viktor does have a temper. One that we were shown, when he snaps at Jayce on the bridge-literally smacking his hand away when he tries to help him up after being outright discriminative. When Mel even alludes to hextech weaponry, he gets upset-and then outright angry-teeth bared angry at the fact she would bloody their work-HIS work with Jayce in war. He and Jayce linger on it-he begins experimenting on himself because he realizes Mel has gotten to Jayce in a way he can’t pull back. The promise to destroy the hexcore, the thing he MADE Jayce promise his last wish was violated.

He stumbles out of this upright chrysalis entirely changed, amalgamation of flesh and organic looking metal-braces permanently encased to his body. He sees the blueprints for hextech weaponry, he SEES the schematics for Catelyin’s rifle. And he just..leaves, just “I must say goodbye to this place.”

I’ve seen the argument made: “the hexcore is controlling him!”

Then why does he show clear emotion in episode six? Why then and there can he express fear, concern, gratitude, outwardly. Not in the astral realm! Outwardly-his sass is even shown to be intact when Jinx thinks she has jokes! So why the hell did he never once get angry about his agency being robbed, about his life literally being left in someone else’s hands when that was something season 1 was alluding too?

And what about sky? I’m still so throughly confused on what her purpose of being back was about. Writers have had to clarify what she’s meant to do because of the lack of context! It feels like we have four, forty-five minute episodes missing. And not just of context and story for Viktor but of Sevika-of Jinx-The underground-Zaun’s conflict with piltover! The crux of what season 1 was, these two sisters and the two cities. A Zaunite and Piltovian, we had Cait and Vi, Jinx and Silco, Jayce and Viktor-dynamics that were mapped out. That needed to be explored, how did the undercity come to forgive Jinx after her father exploited most of the residents with Shimmer?

There was an entire lead up to Cait’s role as a dictator and we see..none of it? And the aim changes to finding Warwick and then to Viktor and there is so-so so much happening. It really does feel like three seasons compressed into one, but to the worst extent that the characters don’t feel like themselves. Viktor’s confidence he exudes in season one, that defiance, that determination, the anger we see him hone later. It’s gone, we he does fight Jayce there is not a HINT of anger or resentment-just: “Oh well-I was trying to be peaceful-I am going to kill you now though.”

Sevika’s urgency to make topside pay, is still there-she’s rallying people together, but then we just don’t see her until the big fight. Sure Scar is with her there-but that doesn’t say anything about it she’s leading whole different factions of Zaun after the prison break!

The finale left more questions than things answered, and I extremely dislike the usage of a time loop. Jayce’s line to Viktor of about his disability and his disease made my blood boil on my first watch through. There are so many others ways to say humanity’s imperfections are what make us perfectly human. Use emotions for example-scientifically we as humans have the highest range of emotions, but they don’t make us weak. Our ability to feel things vastly is what drives us to do certain things, art, writing, music, creation as a whole is driven by emotion. Creation can be good or bad, enlightening or destructive, but as humans we have that innate urge to do it because of emotion. Especially those who are artists, by far my favorite part of season two is how many artists looked at what was given and went:…so. I’m going to take this, and make it my own because you clearly cannot be trusted.

In conclusion, when writing fanfic or making art it will be of season one Viktor and the Machine Herald, not the Herald of the Arcane. Shoutout to The Boy Savior though, Ekko also has issues but man did he get the best end of the deal. Viktor enjoyers take care of yourselves, canon isn’t the end all be all. Have fun with making your Au’s or fixitfics, have fun drawing versions of characters you enjoy. And if it helps, season one does end on a very bleak point, but it could be seen as the ending.

[fordtato]

I watched the new Ford vid and I wanted to share some thoughts I had on some of the points in your video. Before anything else, I want to say how much I absolutely fucking love everything you do and that, in my opinion, this video is especially spectacular. My intention here is to show my appreciation for your work by demonstrating how I’ve paid attention to it and thought about it, because I wouldn’t do that if I didn’t care, but I’m definitely not trying to criticize or anything. So, keeping that in mind, I’d like to add some thoughts to a couple points that I feel could’ve been expanded upon, even though the video was already five hours long.

First off, when it comes to the science fair thing, the only point where I do kind of blame Ford is that perpetual motion machines are physically impossible and also delicate. I just think he should’ve made something else and, at the very least, checked on it the morning of the fair and I actually think it’s a little ooc that he put all that effort into making it and was so invested in the fair but then didn’t bother to even look at it before the fair itself. There’s also never any recognition of the fact that something like a perpetual motion machine could literally stop at any point for any number of reasons that wouldn’t require external interference. I don’t think it’s a sin or moral failing like some of the other things people said on the topic of the science fair, but I do think there is some responsibility there on Ford’s end that doesn’t get discussed as much.

The second thing is that I just think that the Book of Bill is pretty openly interpretable in terms of whether it’s fully accurate and canon or not, since it’s made by such a flagrant liar. I respect and appreciate that you view the lost journal pages as canon material that, in universe, was written by Ford, but I also feel like it’s important to acknowledge that we don’t really know for sure one way or another unlike with Journal 3.

My next point is that, on the topic of Ford wanting his house back, it’s everything you said and I would add that Stan staying in the house would require their reconciliation. At the time Ford said that, they were actively in conflict with each other after being in separation for 30 years, so it makes sense that he wouldn’t want Stan to keep living with him given all the tension and unresolved resentment. Especially in tandem with the other things you pointed out, I think it makes complete sense that Ford wouldn’t want Stan to keep living there.

So then, when it comes to Ford being upset with Stan because of how Stan ignored all his warnings and opened the portal anyway, my biggest issue has always been Ford’s hypocrisy here. I can appreciate that, even though everything turned out alright, Stan’s choice to open the portal was objectively bad and Ford is valid for being upset, but he’s the one who ignored all the warnings when he summoned Bill in the first place. While I’d never blame him for being a victim of Bill’s abuse, I do 100% blame him for blowing past all the warnings and reading that incantation in the cave, and it’s hypocritical for him to be mad at Stan for doing the same thing.

Next is the “bumbling leech” quote, and my thought here is just that it makes sense for Ford to tell himself that as like a coping mechanism. When he and Stan were in separation, I imagine it would’ve been easier to tell himself stuff like that and try to believe it and try to stay mad to keep his distance, especially once he was on the other side of the portal. After all, keeping a grudge is easier than reconciliation, especially when you and the other person have no emotional intelligence and limited communication skills.

Lastly, when it comes to pathologizing, I think it’s potentially relevant that Stan and Ford are twins so stuff like autism that’s autistic would be a shared trait that both of them have. I just think it could be interesting to get into the genetic components of some of the different diagnoses that have been proposed for Ford, especially NPD since it does have a genetic factor. If people want to act like Ford is a villain because he potentially has NPD, then those same people have to accept that that would mean Stan does to and tbh I’d love to explore how a cluster b disorder like that could potentially make sense with Stan’s character as well. Maybe then we could actually have a nuanced discussion about such things the way you suggested instead of continuing to demonize these disorders, their symptoms, and the people who have them.

Anyway, sorry this was so long but I just wanted to share and I look forward to seeing what else you come out with in the future 🩷

Well, thank you for sharing, though I do think we disagree on a couple of things. As far as a perpetual motion machine being impossible, like, I think that's the point? Like, the idea is "this is an impossible thing, and Ford, being brilliant, figured it out." The idea of "blaming" a 17-year-old for his physics-defying incredible demonstration of a principle that breaks the laws of physics being... not earthquake stable? Or not sturdy enough to survive a punch on the table? I don't know, guys. Like. Lots of marvels of scientific accomplishment are delicate instruments. I think the logic there is faulty. The science fair project falling apart is not Ford's fault. It WAS stable, then something broke. You can't blame him for making an easy-to-break machine. I've seen this argument floating around a lot recently, and I will be honest, it really annoys me. Would it have been smart for him to check under the sheet that Stan put there to hide it? Yeah, maybe. But it feels silly to say that makes him partly "responsible." I dunno. It's all semantics at some point, and it barely makes a difference, but that isn't how I would describe it.

As far as the Lost Journal pages being written by a liar, I did address this in my ATOTS video, and did not repeat myself in the Ford Defense video, but to summarize : I acknowledge that Bill could have lied in these pages, but for the sake of easily having a discussion about it, I do treat it at face value, simply because it would be annoying to need to add that caveat after every point.

(I also am not a personal fan of the theory that it was forged by Bill, but that's a separate topic altogether. No comment beyond that.)

As far as Ford's "hypocrisy" in warning Stan, I think we have different opinions here as well. Like, Ford does not think that Stan ignoring warnings is wrong, but HIM ignoring warnings is okay. He thinks him ignoring the warnings is the biggest mistake of his life and he's deeply angry at himself. If I burned myself on the stove, and then told someone else not to touch the stove because it is hot, I am not being a hypocrite. I am someone who learned something was dangerous.

Even if we disagree here, however, I appreciate you watching, and you taking the time to share your thoughts with me.

[ladyazurith]

More thoughts on Cater's Dream.

So I wanted to post some of my thoughts on the preview we got for Cater’s card. First off, I’m excited, I thought it would probably be January at the earliest before we saw Heartslabyul’s arc. Cater’s dream is one I’ve been looking forward to the most but also held some anxiety. I’ve taken a lot of time to analyze his character from the pieces sprinkled in the main story, various events, and personal stories we have. I’ve probably looked at every scrap of information and interaction we have for him. He’s a character near and dear to my heart, likely not a surprise for anyone who’s seen my writing.

For the actual Analysis:  

Firstly, I do personally think it’s pointing to him being in charge of *something* the title of King is pretty straightforward, along with the crown on his cheek in place of his diamond. While I can agree it is possible and likely pointing toward him being Heartslabyul’s Dorm Leader/Housewarden in his dream. I think this is an odd choice for his character. The only way I see this being a way that leads to ‘happiness’ for him, is because he’s the type of person that likes to help other people. This has been demonstrated over and over. And by taking on the role of dorm leader, he’s taking that pressure off of Riddle and Trey, which is what leads to Riddle’s overblot. In this position, he can make their lives better/happier. 

I also think the presence of his skateboard indicates that his version of the dorm will be very laid back, where people aren’t afraid like they were under RIddle’s rule pre-overblot. 

There is also the idea that this is all misleading, and it has nothing to do with Heartslabyul and his “King of Tricks” title is because he’s overseeing some kind of Skateboarding tournament. But that’s not a ‘real’ prediction just a bit of a joke I thought might be funny. 

What I don’t think this indicates is that he was the *former* house warden/dorm leader as I see many people speculate. It’s an old theory but had been going around more now that this card has been revealed. To me, that theory never made sense, for two main reasons. One is very blatant. Riddle respects Cater, a lot. He sees him as a friend and even looks up to him in certain areas (he makes comments about not embarrassing Cater in flight class etc). And it’s very clear he doesn’t respect the former dorm leader *at all*. And Secondly, it doesn’t fit Cater’s personality to pursue that position. He doesn’t want the responsibility. If it turns out I’m wrong, I’ll accept it, but I’ll be looking for a really good explanation for the things I’ve mentioned here.  There are other problems I have with the theory but honestly, they’d take their own post. 

One of the things I hope to see in Cater’s dream because it would fit in with Malleus’s own struggle and what we do know of Cater and his struggles, is that he’s surrounded by people he’s truly friends with in his dream, who he doesn’t have to worry about saying goodbye to. It’s referenced more than once that Cater has moved around so much and struggles to be remembered by those he meets and has a hard time forming bonds with other people. If they don’t leverage that angle here I will be unbelievably disappointed.

[the-fox-with-no-name]

Aftg Skit: Wymack's Thanksgiving Story

Wymack is sitting at his desk, rubbing his temples, while Betsy sits opposite him, sipping coffee.

Wymack: (groans) Betsy, you ever have one of those holidays where you wonder if drinking straight through it would’ve been the smarter choice?

Betsy: (calmly) Every year. What happened this time?

Wymack: Thanksgiving. I made the mistake of assigning tasks to the Monsters. Figured I could trust Neil and Kevin to do something as simple as picking up a turkey from the store.

Betsy: (already suspicious) Let me guess. It wasn’t simple.

Wymack: Of course not. (leans back in his chair) I sent them out together, thinking Kevin would keep Neil focused, and Neil would keep Kevin from being...Kevin. Turns out, they’re both equally capable of catastrophic failure.

Betsy: (hides a smirk behind her coffee mug) What happened?

Wymack: (throws his hands up) They lost the turkey, Betsy! Lost it! Somehow, between checkout and the car, the damn thing vanished.

Betsy: (raises an eyebrow) They lost it?

Wymack: That’s what they told me. Neil claims Kevin got distracted arguing with Nicky about frozen versus fresh products being better for athletes, and in the drive back here it “disappeared.”

Betsy: (dryly) Disappeared. Sure.

Wymack: (leans forward) Oh, it gets better. Andrew was the one who found it.

Betsy: (surprised) Andrew? How?

Wymack: Don’t ask me. He just showed up at my door an hour late, holding the turkey in one hand and a bottle of bourbon in the other. Didn’t explain a damn thing.

Betsy: (amused) And you didn’t ask?

Wymack: (grins ruefully) I’ve learned better than to ask Andrew anything when he’s in that mood. He dropped the turkey on the counter, handed me the bourbon, and said, “Happy Thanksgiving, Coach.” Then he walked out.

Betsy: (laughing now) At least he got the turkey back.

Wymack: (sighs) Yeah, but do you know how weird it is to have Andrew Minyard save Thanksgiving? It’s unsettling. Like waiting for the other shoe to drop.

Betsy: (teasing) Maybe he’s just full of holiday spirit.

Wymack: (snorts) Sure. And I’m the Tooth Fairy.

Betsy: (stands up, still laughing) Sounds like you had an...eventful holiday.

Wymack: (mutters) That’s one word for it. Next year, I’m ordering pizza.

Betsy: (heading to the door) Good luck with that. Knowing your lot, they’ll find a way to lose that too.

Wymack: (calling after her) Don’t give them ideas, Betsy!

Happy Thanksgiving Everyone.

[n0vazsq]

Ice Princess | Pau Cubarsi x Reader

pairing . . . pau cubarsi x gf!skater!reader

summary . . . When you're scared about your upcoming competition, Pau makes it his mission to comfort you

request . . . no!!

word count . . . 1.3k+

warnings . . . none!

faceclaim . . . N/A

alexavia yaps . . . ice princess is one of my fav movies of all time so ofc i had to make a fic out of it <33 also fluff bc i feel bad about all the angst ive written so yeah!! hope you guys enjoy <3

taglist . . . @barcapix ,, @f1lover55 (lmk if you want to join the taglist!)

. . . The arena was nearly empty, the distant hum of the Zamboni echoing through the cold air. You sat on the edge of the rink, nervously tightening the laces on your skates, the cold biting at your fingertips.

The competition was less than twenty four hours away, and despite weeks of preparation, anxiety filled your stomach. The stillness and shine of the ice mirrored your reflection, a still figure on the rink.

Pau leaned against the railing, his gaze fixed on you with that soft, thoughtful expression he always had when he thought you couldn’t see. His presence had become a comforting, quiet thing you didn’t know you needed until it was there.

"Are you ready?" he asked, his voice low, filled with gentle encouragement.

You let out a shaky breath, meeting his eyes. "I think so…"

He grinned, the corners of his lips pulling up in a way that always made your heart skip a beat. "You always say that. And then you go out there and prove everyone wrong."

You laughed, the sound filled with nervousness. "This isn’t exactly the same, Pau. It’s not just practice. The regionals are tomorrow. I can’t mess this up."

He walked over, crouching down in front of you so you had no choice but to look at him. His hands found yours, warm and steady despite the cold. "You won’t. I’ve seen how hard you’ve worked for this. You’ve got this."

For a moment, you didn’t say anything, just held his gaze. It wasn’t just the competition that had your nerves on edge, it was the pressure you put on yourself. The long hours of training, the early mornings, the sacrifices.

Sometimes it felt like you were skating on thin ice, trying not to fall through.

"You’re not in this alone, you know," Pau said softly, as if reading your mind. "I’m here. No matter what happens tomorrow, you’ve already won in my eyes."

You felt the sting of tears, blinking them back. "You’re too sweet."

He stood, offering you his hand. "Come on. Show me one more time."

You took his hand, letting him pull you up onto the ice. The familiar glide of your skates steadied you, the world falling away as you moved. The cold of the air against your face, the sharp sound of your blades cutting into the ice.

It all felt like home.

Pau skated alongside you, a little clumsy but focused. He never minded how many times he almost tripped, just wanting to be there with you.

"You’re getting better," you teased, laughing as he nearly fell face first onto the ice.

He gave you a mocking glare, his eyes twinkling. "I’m just trying to keep up with the ice princess."

You rolled your eyes, but you couldn’t hide your smile. "I still can’t believe you’re out here, freezing with me."

He shrugged, his grin softening. “I'm wearing layered clothes and a coat. You're in…this," He gestured to your skating dress, hands going up and down. "Besides, I’d rather be here than anywhere else.”

You felt the tension in your chest ease, the weight of tomorrow’s competition lifting just a little. You skated ahead, spinning into a perfect loop, the motion effortless, like it was normal.

When you landed, Pau was watching you, his eyes filled with something more than admiration. He skated closer, closing the distance between you. "You know, watching you out here… it’s like you’re flying. I can’t explain it."

You felt your cheeks warm, the compliment hitting deep. "It doesn’t feel like flying without you being my cheerleader."

He laughed, the sound beautiful and warm. "Then I’ll always be here, cheering for you. No matter what."

For a moment, the ice, the arena, the upcoming competition, all of it faded away.

It was just you and him, standing together in the quiet. The world outside the rink didn’t exist; all that mattered was you and Pau.

"Thank you," you whispered, your voice barely audible.

He smiled, leaning in, his forehead resting against yours. "You don’t have to thank me. I believe in you."

The cold air around you felt a little warmer, the ice a little softer beneath your feet. Tomorrow might be the biggest competition of your life, but in that moment, you knew you wouldn’t have to face it alone.

Pau pulled back slightly, his gaze lingering on yours. There was a vulnerability in his eyes, a quiet strength that made your heart pound. "You know… I’ve watched you push yourself so hard for this. I just want you to know that, no matter what happens, it doesn’t change how amazing you are."

You swallowed hard, emotion welling up in your chest. "Pau…"

He brushed a gloved hand against your cheek, his touch so light, almost like a feather. "I mean it. You don’t have to be perfect. You don’t have to win to be worth something. You already are."

A tear slipped down your cheek, and he gently wiped it away. "I guess I’m just scared," you admitted, your voice barely more than a whisper. "Scared of failing. Of disappointing everyone."

He shook his head, his eyes set. "You could never disappoint me. Not even if you tried, hermosa."

"You always know what to say." You laughed softly, the sound laced with tears.

"Only because it’s true," he said, his voice firm. "You’re stronger than you think."

You skated away from him, needing a moment to gather yourself. The ice stretched out in front of you, vast and empty, like a blank canvas.

You took a deep breath, then launched into a spin, letting the movement ground you. When you stopped, Pau was watching, his expression a mixture of awe and pride.

"You’re incredible," he said, his voice adoring.

You skated back to him, your heart pounding. "Only because I have you with me."

"Always." He grinned, pulling you close.

The silence stretched between you, comfortable and warm. Outside, the city continued on, but in that moment, it didn’t matter.

The only thing that mattered was the promise in his eyes, the unspoken vow that he would be there, no matter what.

As you stood there, the ice beneath you and Pau’s arms around you, you knew that you could handle anything. Tomorrow’s competition was just another step, another challenge. But with Pau by your side, you knew you wouldn’t face it alone.

He tilted his head slightly, his eyes searching yours, filled with an emotion that made your breath catch. His hand, still gloved, cupped your cheek gently, his thumb brushing away a stray tear that had slipped down.

"You’re stronger than you think," he whispered, his voice barely audible.

The world around you seemed to fade, the cold air replaced by a warmth that had nothing to do with the arena.

Slowly, almost hesitantly, he leaned in, his lips meeting yours in a soft, lingering kiss. It was gentle, yet it held all the unspoken words, the promises, the quiet support he had given you.

When he pulled back, his forehead rested against yours, a small, almost shy smile playing on his lips. "No matter what happens tomorrow… you’ve already won in my eyes."

Your heart swelled, a mixture of nerves and comfort washing over you. "With you here, I feel like I have."

For a moment, the ice, the world outside, the pressure of the competition, all of it disappeared. There was only Pau, the steady beat of his heart, and the quiet promise of something more.

"I'll love you forever, and I'll support you no matter what, mi princesa de hielo."

After he said that, you knew that whether you won or lost, you'd have someone by your side.

And that someone was the love of your life.

[angelasscribbles]

The Pizza Caper

Series: Unbothered

Fandom: The Royal Romance

Pairings: Riley x Drake, Riley x Liam, Riley x Hana

Rating: MA

Warnings for this chapter: Mature Themes

Word Count: 1,817

A/N: @karahalloway sent me an AITA post about guests ordering pizza to a wedding reception after not getting any food before it ran out and the bride getting upset about them ruining her aesthetic. And I thought, what if Riley ordered pizza that night in Lythikos when Olivia didn't feed them? It was going to be the Bad Romance gang but as I started writing, I was like you know what? This gives Unbothered vibes. So here we are.

“Hey!” Riley watched as yet another waiter passed by without stopping to serve their table. “What about us?”

“I’m sorry, ma’am.” The waitress gave her an apologetic look. “I’m just following orders.”

She huffed as she threw herself back into her chair. “This is bullshit!”

“That’s Olivia.” Drake drummed his fingers on the tabletop. He was used to Olivia treating him like a second class citizen, but she had never starved him before. “She must really hate you.”

“Eh,” Riley shrugged dismissively. “She’s just jealous of me, that’s all.” Her eyes scanned the room until she found Liam. She smiled and waggled her fingers at him. He rewarded her with a huge smile from his table at the front. Olivia noticed.

“Damn. If looks could kill, I’m pretty sure you’d be dead, Brooks.”

“So, are we supposed to just sit here and starve?”

“Doesn’t look like we have much choice.”

“Oh, there’s always a choice.” She smirked as she drew her cell phone from her clutch.

“What are you doing?”

“Ordering pizza. What do you want on yours?”

Drake stared at her with his mouth open. “You can’t just have pizza delivered in the middle of a formal ball! Can you?”

“Why not?”

He stared at her for a few more seconds and then threw his head back as laughter bellowed out of him. “I want meat. Lots of it. Pepperoni, bacon, sausage, whatever they got.”

“What about you, Hana?”

“Oh! I… uh… I’ve never had pizza before. I don’t know what to order.”

“It’s ok, girl. I got you.” Riley gave her a wink.

Drake watched as Hana turned pink under Riley’s flirtations. His hand slipped under the table to adjust himself, amazed at how this woman could make anything sexy. His gaze darted to the front table. Liam might like her, but he wouldn’t be able to marry her, right? He still had a shot.

Riley ordered the pizza and then instructed them to text her when they arrived so she could meet them at the door.

Thirty minutes later, Hana delicately picked up her knife and fork and started cutting her pizza. “It smells great!”

“That’s probably just ‘cause you’re starving,” Drake mumbled through a mouthful of pepperoni and bacon.

Riley lifted a slice laden with cheese and vegetables to her mouth and sank her teeth in. She closed her eyes in appreciation. “Mmmm! I didn’t know they made pizza this good in Europe!”

Drake lowered his hand to peer at her over his pizza. “What do you mean?”

Her brows furrowed. “What do you mean, what do I mean?”

“I mean,” He leaned back in his chair, as he sat his slice down on the empty plate in front of him. “What do you mean you didn’t know Europe had good pizza?”

Riley shrugged. “Why would I know that?”

“Where do you think pizza originated?” he scoffed. “I mean, Italy is right—” his train of thought completely derailed as he watched her lick her fingers, one at a time.

She glanced up at him when he went quiet. “What?”

“Never mind. Pizza totally originated in Chicago.” He would agree with her that the sky was green if that’s what it took to make her notice him.

Max approached their table. “Excuse me, Riley, but they’re about to start the dancing and I was wondering if you would do me the honor of…. Is that pizza? Where did you get pizza?” He grabbed an empty chair from the table behind them and shoved it between the two women, forcing Hana to scoot over. “Can I have a slice of that?”

“Of course!” Riley lifted a cheesy, steaming slice from the box and handed it to him with a smirk. “Your brother paid for it.”

Max shoved half the piece into his mouth and bit down. He closed his eyes as he chewed, savoring the explosion of flavors that danced across his tongue. “Oh, this is so good!”

“Didn’t you have lobster, Beaumont?” Drake shot him a disdainful look.

“I did. It was delicious. But so is this.”

“It is really good, Riley,” Hana interjected. “Thank you for introducing me to it.”

The tap tap of stiletto heels interrupted the conversation. “What the hell is this?”

Riley looked up at the hostess with a disarming smile. “Oh, hi, Olivia. This is an American dish called pizza.”

“Yes, Riley, I know what pizza is! I’m not an imbecile. Also, it’s not an American dish, you plebeian.” If the duchess clenched her jaw any harder, her teeth might shatter. “What is pizza doing at my formal ball?”

“Oh, well,” Riley paused to swallow and wipe her fingers on a napkin before explaining. “Your staff never fed us and we were hungry.”

“Yes,” the redhead smirked. “That was by design, but it still doesn’t explain—”

“What was by design?”

Olivia jumped as Liam appeared behind her. “Oh! I….” her mind spun frantically. She couldn’t admit in front of the prince that she had purposely sabotaged her own guests. How would that look to a man who was interviewing women for the position of queen? “The meal! It was meticulously planned to please both the eye and the palate. Bringing a pedestrian food like pizza into the room has ruined the aesthetic!”

Liam’s eyes scanned across the table, taking in both the pizza boxes and the guests. His gaze settled on Riley’s face with an adoring grin. “I’m sure Riley had a good reason.”

Riley smiled back at him as she leaned forward, giving him a better view of her ample cleavage. “We were starving! The waitstaff never brought us a stitch of food, and as you can see, dinner is now over.”

Liam glanced around the room. It was true. People were milling about, the band was tuning up, and the wait staff were clearing tables, not serving food. His attention went back to the table, noting the still clean place settings. Other than streaks of pizza sauce on Drake’s plate, which he was now licking, there was no sign that anyone at the table had eaten. “What an unfortunate oversight.”

Olivia’s face flamed red with anger and embarrassment as she tried to distance herself from the situation. “Yes, a terrible mishap. I’ll speak to the kitchen staff personally to find out how this happened and ensure it never happens again.”

“The music is starting.” Max stood up and offered his hand to Riley. “I’m sure Liam will be dancing the first dance with the hostess, per tradition. As one of your sponsors, I would be happy to escort you through the Cordonian Waltz.”

“Yes,” Olivia gloated, her hand landing on Liam’s arm. “We should go dance.”

“Of course,” Liam gave her a forced smile as he tamped down his disappointment. The smile he gave Riley was real. “I’ll see you later, Lady Riley.”

As they walked away, Olivia glared over her shoulder at Riley.

Drake shook his head. “She really hates you!”

“She really doesn’t,” Riley laughed. “You’ll see. Once we aren’t competing for the same man, Olivia and I will be friends. I’m sure of it!”

Drake watched as Max led Riley out on the dance floor. It was the first time in his life that he wished he had learned the damned Cordonian Waltz. He should have distracted himself somehow, but instead, he sat there like an idiot watching Max holding her close. “Fuck.” He sat back in his chair with a sigh and reached for another slice of pizza.

“You really like her, don’t you?”

“What?” He fumbled the pizza in his hands as he looked up at Hana in panic. He had forgotten she was still at the table. “Why would you say that?”

“Because it’s true.”

“No more than you.” He scoffed.

“What?” Pink splotches suffused her face and neck. “I… n…no, I mean, yes, she’s my friend but—”

“Hey, hey!” he reached across the table to pat her hand. “It’s okay. I’m not going to tell anyone. There’s no need to panic.”

Hana looked down at the tablecloth and then up at the ceiling. No response came to mind, so she didn’t give one.

“One thing you should know, though.”

She finally looked at him. “What’s that?”

“Liam’s not going to marry her. But I am.”

She was staring at him with her mouth agape when Riley made it back to the table.

“Hey guys, what are you talking about?”

“Ah, nothing!” Hana sat up straighter. Her eyes jerked from Drake’s face to Riley's. “I was just thinking…. I saw a magnificent piano in the music room. I would love it if you’d let me play something for you.”

Before she could answer, Drake interjected, “Actually, Brooks, I was hoping you’d want to explore this place with me. I know where the wine is.”

“Oh, she can drink wine any day,” Hana told him sweetly. “But it’s rare to find a Steinway Centennial Concert Piano!”

“But—”

“Guys, stop it!” Riley giggled. “There’s no need to fight over me!”

“No, we weren’t—”

“It’s not like that—”

A collective gasp from the rest of the room drew their attention. Riley turned around just in time to witness Olivia in a lip lock with Liam.

Drake and Hana’s eyes met in mutual concern about how Riley would take this turn of events. But when she turned back to them, she was smiling.

Hana reached for her hand. “Are you okay?”

“Yes. Why wouldn’t I be?”

Drake answered. “Because you just watched Liam kiss Olivia.”

“So? Liam didn’t look that into it. Besides, I’d kiss her so I can’t blame him for it.”

“Oh!” Heat flamed across Hana’s face again. “So, you like girls, too?”

“Absolutely!” Riley leaned closer to Hana with a smirk. “Especially sweet, shy girls.”

Hana’s eyes went wide as she lost the ability to speak.

“What about guys?” Drake drew her attention back to himself. “I mean, other than princes. Do you have a type?”

“Why?” she countered. “Are you hoping you’re my type?”

His response was quick and unabashed. “Yes.”

“Tell you what,” she moved away from Hana to position her lips right next to his ear. “After I spend some time with Hana tonight, I’ll meet you in that wine cellar and we’ll find out. How’s that sound?”

“That….yes!”

“Bring the leftover pizza. Now I have to go find Liam.” She turned to Hana. “See you in the music room when this is over.”

They both watched her walk away. Both were determined to sway her from Liam’s side.

When Riley disappeared out the French doors onto the patio, they turned their attention back to each other. Their eyes met over the half empty pizza boxes, both sets filled with understanding. They liked each other and it wasn’t personal, but the battle lines had been drawn and neither one was pulling any punches.

[lotusishere]

So before dating it was Sophie. I wanted to say her crush felt more like admiration for him? I’ve always had this theory about their relationship. I thought their crushing was based on admiration for the other and not knowing how to go about it. Fitz is the person who found her. Someone who is very attractive and not to mention very popular. It makes sense for her to look at him with her big ol brown eyes because she’s never had anyone see her the way Fitz does. People forget that Sophie was HEAVILY bullied and didn’t have any friends. She was alone and YOUNG. It makes sense that the first person that shows her kindness, and helps her realize that her differences are similarities, would become someone she sees and values heavily to her. She wants to be his friend and be important to him.

But when they first started dating it’s clearly obviously Fitz. (But why Atlas???!) because Sophie didn’t even get a say either or not that were a couple right away. She told him she was interested in him and he was interested in her. It’s clearly seen thag she wanted to wait before starting any dating or anything serious, because of Neverseen and HEAVY drama hitting them. Fitz got overly excited and jumped the gun and told everyone they were dating. That makes sense for a teenage boy who likes a girl. I don’t think he’s ever dated someone before. But he does like her (or I believe so) he makes her gifts and wants to show her off. But Sophie isn’t ready for it. She wanted to wait to think and have time before committing to him. Which MAKES SENSE.

I also believe Sophie believed she liked Fitz. It would make sense to like him because he was the obvious choice. He was someone she admired. He was someone who found her and showed her the world she belonged too. He was someone who stayed by her side in the first book the best he could. The thing about Sophie and Fitz is that they look GREAT on paper. They’re cognates, they both like one another and etc etc. But I believe the underlying issues to pushed them away was the situations backing them into corners. Fitz has a temper. That’s clear and it made Sophie feel nervous to talk to him. Hell I would be nervous to talk to him. But it also pushes the question if Fitz would have liked her if they didn’t spend as much time together. They only spent that much time together because of the Neverseen drama and side missions of having to save the world. I feel like there has always been soo much drama that it tore them apart. They’re children. They are still growing. They are still going through trauma and struggling to cope.

I am not the biggest fan of Fitz but I truly don’t think he meant to hurt her during their relationship. He cares about her and he is clearly struggling with himself. I’m not justifying his actions and what he has said because he has..said some things but. At the end of the thing. I think it’s the Sophie “fell” first and Fitz fell harder trope.

During the sophitz era

[angelic-eros]

I’m doing much better today. I’m feeling more alive than I was a while ago.

A man walked into work today who I hadn’t seen in months. One who told me I remind him of his home and who I planned to paint my room with. He had one drink and then left to pack for his flight to Scotland.

A friends cat climbed onto my lap and reached to place her paw on my neck the way my cat who passed earlier this year did. I started to tear up in my friends living room while we talked about concerts and clothes.

I fought to remember a store me and an old fling used to pass when we would walk to the park we’d sit and drink in until midnight but never went in. Instead we’d walk past and buy cheap alcohol and talk about sex and drug parties I’d never plan on attending, if just to make the time go quicker.

I made a white dress for an event next week that makes me feel beautiful. On Sunday I will have a day off work and a regular told me I should go to church. Instead I will spend it making the outfit for a concert in the city I travelled to to lose my virginity with a man I haven’t spoken to since I came out as a lesbian.

Today I will go to a museum and look at the artists that came before me and I will be with the partner who I confessed to after time in a rose garden and a blossom tucked behind my ear that still is saved in my phone case.

All this happened today and all these events first happened in the first few months of this year. I feel exhausted but I feel alive and I feel loved. And that’s better than I felt a few months ago.

[eternalstateofoctober]

— 𝔞𝔩𝔩 𝔦 𝔴𝔞𝔫𝔫𝔞 𝔟𝔢 𝔦𝔰 𝖊𝖛𝖊𝖗𝖞𝖙𝖍𝖎𝖓𝖌 𝖆𝖙 𝖔𝖓𝖈𝖊 | AMC’s IWTV

also known as ”local woman is roused to learn editing to deliver everyone this fandom classic” (the video's synced better on desktop)

transcription/video description under the cut:

[video description: a fan video/edit of amc’s ”interview with the vampire” by tumblr user @eternalstateofoctober (me!!) set to a shortened version of lenka’s ”everything at once”. the video clips are cut to the rhythm of the song and its changing lyrics. the song is catchy and upbeat with a light, bouncy rhythm and a whimsical but also slightly melancholic vibe at times. it has a steady beat with repeating piano notes and some xylophone. the video clips are muted so only the song is playing, save for a few voiceover lines and sound effects.

(instrumental intro, repeating piano notes)

the théâtre des vampires orchestra starts playing and another member checks the projector. a watermark with the username @eternalstateofoctober flashes on screen and disappears at the same time as a projector light flickers.

🎵 as sly as a fox 🎵

two clips of daniel after the trial script reveal. first he tosses the script to louis, then he pushes his glasses up and casts a hard look at an off-screen armand.

🎵 as strong as an ox 🎵

armand uses the mind gift to make the coven fall asleep at the dinner table in 2x04, voiceover of him yelling ”enough!” angrily and banging the table. table settings clattering. then lestat using the mind gift at the trial to manipulate louis’ sentence. his left ear starts bleeding. VO lestat: ”banishment...”

🎵 as fast as a hare 🎵

louis sprints at daniel in ’73, making him stumble back.

🎵 as brave as a bear 🎵

clips of young daniel being tortured by armand. first he lifts his gaze, then there’s two clips of him being slammed down by armands powers. last clip is him closing his eyes while armand holds his face. VO of daniel’s grunts and whimpers.

🎵 as free as a bird 🎵

claudia on stage as baby lu mimes opening a window made of projections happily.

🎵 as neat as a word 🎵

claudia writes in her diary in season 1, the clip has a double exposure effect with her pen moving on the page.

🎵 as quiet as a mouse 🎵

a wide shot of the sewers the children of darkness inhabit.

🎵 as big as a house 🎵

establishing shot of the théâtre des vampires building. suddenly the screen flashes black and there’s a quick flickering shot of the talamasca logo on daniel’s laptop screen and a glitching sound effect.

🎵 as mean as a wolf 🎵

close-up of santiago on stage in 2x02, he looks right at the audience seductively.

🎵 as sharp as a tooth 🎵

shots of the vamps baring their fangs. lestat ripping the priests throat out in 1x01, claudia in madeleine’s shop, louis in ’73 showing off to daniel, armand hissing at lestat in 2x03.

🎵 as deep as a bite 🎵

extreme close-up of lestat biting louis at the altar.

🎵 as dark as the night 🎵

madeleine lights a candle that illuminates her face during a power outage. she’s watched from outside her shop window by a curious claudia.

🎵 as sweet as a song 🎵

young daniel embraces armand after armand has manipulated him to accept death. armand strokes his hair and there’s armand’s calm whisper as a voiceover: ”i’ll hold you…”

🎵 as right as a wrong 🎵

claudia’s real turning. lestat looks up from an off-screen louis who’s begging on his knees. in the second clip he’s kneeling next to claudia on the floor and lifting her upper body while louis’ back is still turned to them.

🎵 as long as a road 🎵

louis’ finger taps a spot on a map in the warzone.

🎵 as ugly as a toad 🎵

the vampire bruce cocking his head.

🎵 as pretty as a picture, hanging from a fixture 🎵

lestat’s portrait hangs on the wall in the théâtre’s green room in 2x02, jumpcut to it in flames in 2x08.

🎵 strong like a family 🎵

the de pointe du lac and frenière families pose for a portrait at grace’s wedding. the clip changes to the next with the camera’s flash going off.

🎵 strong as i wanna be 🎵

VO Madeleine: ”mais j'ai survécu.” (”but i survived” in french). shots of madeleine’s past, the trial by mob. extreme close-up of her crying face, the angry crowd surrounding her, her screaming while her hair is shorn. the segment ends with her throwing an iron through her shop window where a group of locals has just painted a swastika. sound effect of glass shattering.

🎵 bright as day, as light as play 🎵

madeleine’s vision of claudia as she’s turned. claudia in a yellow dress in madeleine’s shop, smiling to the camera—at madeleine—and turning to the mirror. the whole scene basks in warm, bright afternoon light.

🎵 as hard as nails 🎵

grace looks up at a slightly off-screen louis in 1x05, a hard, difficult look. they are at louis’ fake grave at night and grace is holding a funeral bouquet.

🎵 as grand as a whale 🎵

two clips after one another. first is louis being buried alive in 2x07, a silent scream as the rocks rush to cover his face. second one is his feet stepping onto the rocks in the penthouse’s sundial room. VO old daniel: ”where’s your coffin?”

(the music quiets and slows down slightly for the next line.)

🎵 as warm as the sun 🎵

close-up of claudia burning in the sun at the trial. she is turning into ash but still looks at an off-screen lestat.

🎵 as silly as fun 🎵

several clips in rapid succession. murder family laughing at a movie theatre, them dancing together—holding hands, claudia cheering riding the sidecar of a motorcycle in paris during the théâtre’s group hunting, armand smirking wearing malek’s glasses, vamp daniel’s tv interview, him laughing at the host.

🎵 as cool as a tree 🎵

real rashid steps slightly forward, hands clasped behind his back with a neutral expression.

🎵 as scary as the sea 🎵

two clips of armand in ’73. first his eyes shake as he slams daniel down with his powers in the background, then him turning slowly—eyes wide—to face daniel that’s sitting in front of him.

🎵 as hot as fire 🎵

three clips showing fire in the show. first: daciana throwing herself into the flames, second: armand’s fire gift, him looking at a flame in his hand, third: the théâtre’s fire starting behind louis as he looks into claudia’s mirror backstage. the mirror reads ”tweedily deedily dead”.

🎵 cold as ice 🎵

louis cuts off santiago’s head, louis smirking, looking down. VO: louis’ satisfied chuckle.

🎵 sweet as sugar and everything nice 🎵

VO louis and old daniel: ”would you like a sample?” ”i’m a savory man most days.” with first a clip of armand-as-rashid’s blissful expression as louis drinks from him at the dinner table in 1x05, then three clips of sweet treats: the strawberry dessert from 1x02 being set in front of daniel, daniel taking a bite of it, then young daniel sipping his grasshopper at mary’s. the clip ends with old daniel’s hand pushing his coffee cup forward, requesting a refill.

🎵 as old as time 🎵

armand stares at a painting depicting him in the louvre, eyes wide, brows slightly furrowed, head slightly turned.

🎵 as straight as a line 🎵

the recording on daniel’s laptop flatlining, him looking at armand, armand smiling warmly at him.

🎵 as royal as a queen 🎵

lestat basks in all his king raj mardi gras costume glory, he smiles widely up at the camera positioned above his head.

🎵 as buzzed as a bee 🎵

lestat on stage in 2x03, wiggling his shoulders, smiling playfully, flipping his coat tails up and bending over for the audience.

🎵 as stealth as a tiger 🎵

estelle and celeste spying on louis and claudia in paris.

🎵 smooth as a glider 🎵

armand floats up the louvre floors as louis and dreamstat take the stairs.

🎵 pure as a melody, pure as i wanna be 🎵

first, a shot of louis and paul dancing at grace’s wedding, smiling at each other. then, a close-up of paul sitting of the roof, turning to look at an off-screen louis as the screen slowly fades to black and another watermark appears. the voiceover is paul and louis’: ”i love you, louis.” ”i love you too, baby brother.”

/end video description]

[dannybobany]

WJHWUWYGWBWRI’M FWBWUYGBFF YEAH

The “Sol lantern” glowing with yellow light rather then red is simultaneously the idea of the parasite trapping the light of the sun but also a statement about purity in a way? Marze’s lantern is that of manufactured light, he does not shine naturally, that is light that must be made with sacrifice and pain… but Sol? Sol glows all on his own… his light is pure and glows of whites and golds, because Sol is meant to glow

⬆️ interpret this as you will

BUT ON HOW THIS RELATES TO THE LIGHTBULB….

Sunny’s black lightbulb and Basil’s white lantern both represent fear to me, a fear they must both overcome to survive this— for Sunny it’s Omori and the fear of letting go of headspace, For Basil it’s HIM and confronting the realities of both Sunny’s and his own flaws as people and the fear of imperfection. (Sunny’s imperfection and the fact it exists, and Basil’s imperfection in the fact that it isn’t as bad and he’s convinced himself, and the inevitable need to let go of this view of things)

And also! You are very right to think that Marze would see things differently depending on his route but the thing is I’m not sure if this fight happens every route… because this fight is supposed to be the “canon” path, but the “good” path in my eyes leads to a straight up Sol fight- because like I’ve said before, Sol is the very embodiment of the delusion Basil lives in, rejecting the path he’s been put on means killing him, because the parasite wasn’t the real problem…

This of course is unrealistic, which it’s kind of meant to be- the better route in Marzenie assumes Basil always makes the best, wisest decision, which he wouldn’t- especially since some of it in a game sense would rely more on player intuition then anything Basil himself would be aware of

Anyway- I have it in my head that in the hypothetical ‘better route’, this area actually leads to Basil and Sunny having a conversation rather then ever fighting, because another thing I’ve said is that I really don’t think Sunny expected to PHYSICALLY FIGHT BASIL right then

With that said, Marzenie’s Better route is nigh impossible, I said how it assumes good choices out of Basil but it does the same for Sunny too- it assumes he’s playing the good route- that’s the only way any of this happens, and to be fair- all of Marzenie assumes Sunny is playing the good route but… still

That’s like. Three ish decisions on Sunnys part. Basil interacts with dozens of people and places through his four days- Sunny spends that first day in headspace and then wakes up at noon every other day so… he’s not getting nearly as much DONE

Ok babble over <3

I feel like drawing scenery

Some of these names are permanent and others aren’t, questions about these locations are welcome if you aren’t sure!

[sexologii]

not to be mushy, but sometimes I see my little underdogs on this show, and they’re just so tired from the game and they’re having a moment of being down and they’re ready to throw in the towel, and I sit behind my screen saying “there’s a lot of game left to play, don’t give up just yet” and then in my life, I’m just having a period of being extremely down and I’m just so ready to give up on everything and I don’t know, there’s a lot of life left to live