#but I want you to have this asap!!
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I think it would be nice to have the option to hide numbers on ao3. Make it where the 'kudos' and 'hits' number is author-viewable only, have an alternate option for when a list is sorted by such so people can read things based off their tags and preferences rather than see big number go brrrr
I speak as someone with popular fics, it doesn't have to be a requirement but like, an option? This could go for other websites too, tumblr notes and the like
#sara shush#just thoughts#i think putting numbers on our creations and posts and basically anything we put online ever has done damage#and most people default to the anxieties that their stuff isnt good enough#but getting a lot of numbers is just as damaging#you want it until you have it and then you have crippling anxiety and burnout and fears because you get stalked and dehumanized#i have a lot of thoughts and feelings#anyway#dont put each other down on this post i will block snipe. everyone be understanding and nice to each other asap
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Prompt:
It’s not that Jason forgot, per se.
But between smuggling a toddler out of the League of Assassins, trekking halfway across the world, and finding a suitable hiding place that’s also child friendly… well, it kind of slipped his mind that he’s supposed to be… dead.
Something that comes back to bite him in the ass when he takes Dami out for some ice cream and just so happens to run into non other than Brucie-fucking-Wayne
#look I’ve found a new fave trope and it’s Brucie Wayne having to keep up his act while internally LOSING HIS SHIT#Jason isn’t very into the whole revenge thing here#his mind is 85 parts ‘keep Dami safe’ 5 parts ‘kill joker asap’ and 10 parts ‘avoid bats at any cost’#Jason doesn’t know who Damian’s father is#dealer’s choice if Jason establishes himself as Dami’s dad or older brother#his build certainly makes him look old enough#if you don’t look at his baby face lol#Jason runs into Brucie and goes straight into survival mode#Damian who is very observant for a toddler immediately clocks Brucie as THREAT based on Jason’s reaction#Brucie blue screens and desperately tries not to lose Jason in the crowd#jason is absolutely trying to lose Brucie in the crowd#while clutching Damian like his life depends on it#for all he knows it does#the visceral terror that your pseudo dad will take away your little brother/baby#Bruce who just wants to know if he’s hallucinating again: W A I T#jason who is terrified of being put in Arkham for killing people: no FUCKING WAY#hm maybe Jason plays the ‘I’m not Jason’ game again#it’s not gonna hold for long#but Bruce absolutely thinks that Damian is Jason’s bio child for a while and he’s on the WARPATH#Jason was sixteen when he died and never showed any interest in dating so literally every red flag is waving in brucie’s mind simultaneousl#or maybe Jason manages to get away and all Brucie is left with is the memory of his supposedly dead son#running away from him#and clutching a tiny kid#prompts#jason todd#batfamily#Damian wayne#batdad#brucie wayne
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last night i got home kind of tipsy and very much in tears and my mother told me the force you exert to keep someone in your life is proportional to the force with which they will leave your life. if you have to fight tooth and claw to keep them, their leaving will be just as hard, just as harsh, and just as definite.
#she said it like a law. its just momentum.#also she told me to get a therapist and start archery ASAP bc i need to get it together#and also she said even granting that this person u were in love w was So Special . as in hot motorcycle-riding iranian masc lesbian in ldn#they arent the only one on earth and that once i start my proper adult life outside of studies etc etc i will probably no longer live in th#UK. she said most non straight iranians u would like have left the country anyway . where do you think they went? theyre out there#and also she asked me to imagine how many hot gay iranians there may be in italy or amsterdam or smth and i was like ok points 😭 maybe#ur right. anyway i was having a feeling of dread bc crying into the arms of ur strict asian mother while buzzed usually results in#death chaos destruction etc in the next few days but actually i think maybe she has genuinely changed as a person and the fear is#unwarranted#anyway i need to eat breakfast and study w the date person i met yesterday#they are so nice ??? genuinely so so sweet i dont feel attracted to them at all omg i genuinely think i have a thing for hot evil ppl 😭#but we could b besties . theyre a lot more romantic than the ex situationship person too like generally . ugh they should be perfect but#alas it appears i am shallow as fuck or potentially a lesbian actually#OH THEY MIGHT ALSO BE POTENTIALLY A LESBIAN BTW#i think i just tend to not date cis ppl entirely by accident#....feel free to rb if u want btw sorry for the rant
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you should draw fiddleford in some other outfits☺️☺️😋😋😋 (this isn’t a coverup to make my fidd obsession sweet… I swear…)
Here he is with a funky outfit :)
And here he is wearing a straight jacket (from an uncooked au I have in my mind, don't ask)
#this first drawing obliterated the back side of the paper. rip#I wanted to draw him wearing something warm and cozy but it's too warm outside for that right now#be careful what you ask for#btw this made me realize how hard it is to draw these straight jackets. how do they work?#my man needs therapy asap#ask#anonymous#gravity falls#fiddleford mcgucket#fiddleford hadron mcgucket#art#fanart#traditional art#for that au now. Stanford got sucked into the portal while Fidds was there. before Stanley managed to come#he tried to warn the town and they thought he was crazy. locked him up for a bit. society of the blind eye took things in their own hands#I don't know what else. literally so uncooked you'll get salmonella just by trying to think about it#I have so many random sniplets of aus in my mind. if I were to flesh them out I wouldn't have time to do anything else#I'm thinking about them before I sleep
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Hi! Your Hollow Knight AU has really cheered me up so I wanted to do a little drawing for it! This got me to get my art tablet out after months of not feeling like it so thank you for the inspiration! I hope the colors look good on any monitor that's not mine sdfsdf
Bugs In the Jingshi wyd?
I am so genuinely awestruck at how well you translated this AU to the hollow knight style! Also obsessed with the height difference.
#mdzs au#hollow knight#lan wangji#wei wuxian#fanart#Thank you so much for this B'*)#This is *so* incredible!! I feel incredibly honoured to have inspired something so beautiful!#I showed this asap to my friend who's been letting me observe their hollow knight playthrough and oh man oh man. The hype was real.#The colours have the Hollow Knight gloomy swag and the way that this looks like it could be an area in the game is soooooo good.#Thinking about the bug sounds they would make.....Peace and love on earth could be achieved with lwj hollowspeak....#I hope you keep finding fun things to draw!! Your art has continuously brought a lot of joy!#I very much understand the pain and struggle of having a craft you just...cant seem to get your heart back into.#Sending you so much love and energy and artistic inspiration!!!!#(lwj has the wrong eye shape b/c I was too focused on getting the silly angle for dramatic perspective. whoops)#I have honestly loved doing this AU and I'm fiercely happy that its been resonating with people (as it makes me want to do more hehe)
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'cuz you know, Spa natural
#supernatural#supernatural fanart#spn fanart#dean winchester#castiel#sam winchester#team free will#suptober22#I just want this on my profile asap skfhsj#Cas bby you can have all the cucumbers u like#my art
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IT IS TIME. BASTARD FAMILY LINEUP 2023 BABY!!!! WOOO!!
#the hollowridge disaster#oc ref sheet#dragonfang#adam#knife#adriel#dianne#nirven#beial#richard#december#WOOO YEAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I LOVE ALL THESE GUYS SO MUCH i have been working so hard on this for a few days im so excited to have it done#also before you ask yes adris jacket is grey in this because it fits the b/w theme i want for HR but canonically its teal denim still#that has not changed#ALSO ADAM WEIGHT RIGHTS. PUT SOME HEFT ON THAT GUY#no longer a malnourished emo boy. hes still emo though.#and bei melanin rights too#im gonna explode i love these guys so much i need to show this asap on god!!!#if you are new here i hope u like them!! if you are an old fan/follower i hope u love them still!! :DDD i got a lot of stuff planned#hollowridge my fucking beloved of all time how i have missed you so..............................#💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞
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My toxic trait is that whenever i see crafts i have zero knowledge of or experience with, my first thought is "i totally teach myself that"
#brought to you by me seeing someone making stuffed toys by hand and wanting to learn asap#i have no skill whatsoever no idea who to ask for help but is that going to stop me?#i have what i like to call crafting hubris#i live in the illustion that i can teach myself any skill#is this true? maybe not but it's not going to stop me#cris speaks
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i've shared my thoughts on this in dms with like 3 people so i wanted to put it on paper so i can always get it
so i think one of the biggest questions that goes around tcoaatl is regarding it's incest, asked in both good faith and by annoying antis: "so is the incest... actually like portrayed as bad? or is it just hot and fetishized and romanticized?" and y'know, i think the most genuinely HONEST answer regarding that is this: "it's both." (the later mostly romanticized)
the Graves siblings have a horrifically co-dependent relationship which even the steam page is very happy to make you remember, multiple characters acknowledge it, it's a fucking awful terrible thing and you can make decisions that acknowledge it and its obvious to anyone with two eyes and a brain capable of basic critical thought that realistically while you can do w/e you want in a fanfic in a canon sense there's no way gravecest cannot result in what will ultimately be a lifetime of suffering even if both parties don't want to admit it. you're condemning them both to a chance of ever finding real genuine happiness that can exist without the other
that being said? they're both conventionally attractive and the game doesn't really shy from making its physical intimacy look hot and it's clear that nemlei doesn't want that physical intimacy to be disgusting or something that will make you feel ashamed if you intentionally pursued
i feel like this is the aspect of tcoaal that is debated the most on all sides of the fandom and i just wanted to post my own two cents in that i think the answer is "its both." the extent of how co-dependent these two are is very clear that it's not good and that most likely in the final release the best outcome for these two will probably involve acknowledging it
but also if you were to approach nemlei and just told her "listen i just think it's hot i don't give a shit about any of that other stuff i just wanna ship them." i think nemlei herself would nod and respect your decision completely. probably feed you even more if anything
you're free to disagree with me, i just wanna state my own thoughts somewhere, so i think the answer is a very solid "it's both" when it comes to this. tcoaal portrays the incest as horribly psychologically damaging for these two but also at the same time it's obviously not gonna judge you for liking it and if you find it hot nemlei would never judge you for it i think
but i just cannot in any capacity really take the argument it's a hard one or another seriously. i think if tcoaal wanted gravecest to only be seen as bad and horrifying that nemlei would've made different decisions in writing it bc it's obvious she COULD have if she wanted to, but also it's not fair to say it just makes incest look hot and sexy when it does show how fucked up it's characters are because of it
so... just wanted to say yeah- i think it's both
#starposts#you are completely free to disagree with me i just want this written down#so i don't have to rewrite this 20 times bc i've already had to rewrite this like 3 times in private conversations#the coffin of andy and leyley#tcoaal#andrew graves#ashley graves#gravecest#coffincest#discourse cw#long post#nemlei#also its to my understanding nemlei uses she/her if i'm incorrect please let me know and i'll edit this asap
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"—matsukawa, quit pushing me down, asshat!" "nah." "i will kick your shins bro do not test me—"
alt. ver. before the redraw (bc i still kinda like this 😔)
#a silly !#yumeship#matsukawa issei#haikyuu oc#hanamaki takahiro#haikyuu#mblue art#self insert#ocsona#seijohbros au#<— will b using this tag to refer to these shenanigans w my haikyuu ocsona for now 🫶#maybe in the near future i'll make a (tentative?) ref sheet for this new lil guy <3#(i say that knowing i havent made new/official ref sheets for my own utmv sonas lmfaooo 😔💔)#also yeah um dont mind the shading! or any anatomy mistake! i wanted this out of my head asap and move on to the next doodle</3#edit i redrew the guys; something in me said smt jst aint right so i changed their angles to be as close to my initial vision as possible--#--and the brain seemed to calm down after that lolz orz#idk if i conveyed it well but mattsun is supposed to look like he's really towering over my ocsona due to the camera angle lol#(ngl that little curve on mattsun's mouth was for the simp in me 😔--#--he was gonna have his usual :/ pout thing but that braincell won and took over /silly)#(ngl every time i look at matsukawa in this i get hit w 1-2hp dmg.)#(hes staring right at the camera/viewer. he looks. soft and . pogi. like cute-handsome. clutches my hair)#(gawddam bestfriends to lovers trope i can never escape from you shakes my fist)
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idea. since askdusttale answered an ask about where dust got his determination from (because dust has SOME determination just so he can remember the timelines and keep going against the human) and said it was totally up to personal interpretation on how he got his determination. so so so like what if what if dusttale's player did something similar to something new's player and changed dust's code to give him determination??? so dust and killer COULD BOTH had their codes tampered with??? the parallels would be INSANE. they both started off as sans and got their codes tampered with by the player but dust and killer went on two opposite paths. dust out of his own voalition decided to go against the human but killer had to team up with the human no choice at all. the opposite parallels go CRAZY oh god im tweaking
killer doesn't know exactly (since i forgot whether or not he can see codes or something like that. i swear there was an image of him describing fell and swap's code and then his own) but he can SENSE that something's off. something's different about dust that he doesn't quite know about. maybe it gets him to ask a bunch of questions that dust is definitely not open to answering because jesus man mind your own damn business but the question that really sets killer off is the way dust answers when he asks "so if you have determination then how did you get it?" and dust just shrugs his shoulders and said that one day he suddenly remembered the resets and then that's when he got it (and then goes back to mumbling to phantom paps or wtvr) and killer's just like. zomg. a sudden change in behavior or mentality that seemingly has no apparent reason related to the human???? like like like when he suddenly had to agree with the player despite literally never wanting to????? killer is over thinking the implications behind this
meanwhile dust is just annoyed now because killer keeps on following him. he keeps asking him strange questions. wtf why is the guy asking to see his SOUL that's incredibly personal???? he just wants to be left alone man he has no idea what's going on
#this is what happens when i go on my weekly ask dusttale scroll through i come up with ideas like this#one day killer asks dust if he knows about the players and creators#dust says no. and the moment killer starts explaining it to him he backs off#because dust is actually fucking going crazy at what he just barely said#there are people above us that control our stories??? our LIVES???#so he wasn't fighting against some random human but a literal god who wanted to play with him out of curiosity???#dust is never going to forget that conversation. killer knows even that one sentence changed him#dust is really paranoid now when he sees a human. immediately kills them compared to before#yk what let's make this nightmare's gang related! nm notices dust's paranoia toward humans#mans is getting upset because he's killing precious negativity. so he asks killer#killer wtf happened to dust i told you to watch over him and horror (sadly i cant drag him into this hc)#and killer's like i might've told him about creators and players and now he's probably having a crisis over his free will and stuff#yeahhhh that dust gets replaced asap. it's better to leave aus unaware of creators in the DUST (haha)#and then promptly replaces him. killer keeps on eyeing the new dust like#is it a dusttale thing? is it all dusts? or was that the only one? maybe this one KNOWS?#but in the end he leaves him alone bc nm told him too. he's still overthinking those implications though#GOD THIS IS SUCH A COOL FUCKING IDEA#askdusttale i love having freedom to come up with ideas like this BLESS 🙏🙏🙏#listen if there were a real canon reason dust gets determination then i wouldn't have this idea#but dusttale's canon is so loose and just structural its GREAT!!!! i love it#and the fact that the dusttale fics dont even change much to the lore??? just explains dusts personality better#HOW MANY MORE PARALLELS CAN THE MTT HAVE BEFORE THEY EXPLODE I SWEAR#killer sans#dust sans#nightmare sans#murder time trio#bad sanses#utmv#sans au#tricule rant
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be father and mother / you'll know what to do
#mithan#resident evil 7#re7#resident evil#mia winters#ethan winters#rose winters#mia is so. the baker coded. TO ME.#anyway i was thinking abt doing smth with 'curses you cant undo left my fathers you never knew' with rose#which reminded me that i did a thumbnail of this page months ago#i dont have a ton of time but i wanted 2 get it out of me asap but maybe ill revisit this someday#I LOVE YOU INTO THE WOODS !!!!#people make mistakes / fathers / mothers / clinging to their own....thinking their alone.....#so mia core.....u get it
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Does anyone here draw in both desktop & mobile? I'm planning to get a galaxy tab at some point and since I don't really have any experience drawing on a (mobile) tablet, I'm curious abt how it feels to draw on one vs. drawing on pc w/ a graphic tablet 🤔
#once I have all my commission slots filled up that's when i'll buy one#i've been hesitating bc i'm not used to spending a big amt for something but honestly it's more of an investment than a simple want#my poor 10 year old laptop + monitor + keyboard setup is the 'pc' im currently using#both the laptop screen & keyboard isn't working properly anymore so i have a separate monitor + keyboard for it#it's pretty laggy most of the time#not sure how it's still holding up#ngl sometimes i'm worried it'll just give up on me & break at any moment#so I kinda wanna have a backup device#anyways! I get easily tired drawing on pc for some reason#I think it's bc i unconsciously tense my neck? whenever i stare at the monitor for too long#also my eyes hurt + the extreme hot weather lately is making me dizzy so i can't work for long periods of time 😔#I see a lot of artists use ipad so i'm guessing drawing on a tab would also feel nice???#also would that get you in the mood to draw more bc you can bring it w/ u anywhere?#i'm hoping to be able to draw more honestly.....#also the timelapse!! csp wont let me record timelapse on my current pc and idk why that is#might be bc im still on win 7#HOPING i could post timelapse vids when i finally have a tab#tbh i want to get one asap (like as in rn) but I want to make sure I have enough budget first so im waiting for my comm slots to be full#bam blabs
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Hello hello!! I absolutely adore Starstruck Dee, she’s a darling!!
I hope it doesn’t sound too strange to ask, but I finished playing through Forgotten Land’s main and postgame stories, and between that and seeing all these wonderful ocs and everything… where can I learn more about the Kirby lore/timeline? Where would I even start with it?
Is it the sorta thing where the base concepts from canon are the same but everyone has their own interpretations of it?
Are Kirby and Bandee kids?? Younger adults? Is it a Rayman situation where they grow up over the course of their games?
I know I sound very uneducated but I really really want to learn!
hi there! thank you so so much! 🥺 i'm so happy that you like her!
this isn't strange to ask at all, and you don't sound uneducated! i'm thrilled to answer for you and if you have any other questions please don't hesitate to reach out!
i'm popping all of this under a read more just because it got very long!
topics covered: the joys of 30+ years of breadcrumb lore delivery, the diverse headcanons of a very creative community, and recommendations on where to step off from if Forgotten Land was your first kirby experience
to be honest kirby "lore" is enormous and sprawling and has been spread out in tiny little crumbs across multiple platforms and medias for over three decades. if you're poking around in tumblr fandom as a starting point, one of the reasons it can be so hard to figure out what's what is because a lot of folks pick one aspect (early game dynamics, ancient anime lore, the mirror world, niche subgames, etc etc) and hyper-focus to their hearts content!
one of the nicest parts about kirby is that the lore, while comprehensive and really cool, is very very open for interpretation. the fandom is very creative, and build all their own niches and headcanons based on the bare bones that we were given in canon, and it's wonderful to see!
for this reason though, i would actually recommend (and this was my personal experience, though only incidentally) you stay outside of the fandom for a bit and formulate all your own preferred headcanons and thoughts, rather than being influenced by others right out the gate. then you can come into fandom and see brand new takes that might surprise you, and hopefully find some folks who have come to the same niche conclusions as you!
a good starting point is Wikirby, and for games specifically their series list is very helpful. it shows you the mainline games, considered 'game canon', and the smaller titles in chronological order. this is often used by folks as a sort of "timeline" for the lore, though again it's totally flexible
forgotten land in particular was an unforgettable (ha!), incredibly beautiful and cinematic game, as well as the series' first foray into 3D gameplay rather than side scrolling platformer.
if you're looking for an active suggestion for which game to play next and you want a similar experience with familiar characters, (and you don't want to do a full chronological playthrough-- this would take you a long time; i should know, i've been working on mine for months!), i would recommend that you try Return To Dream Land Deluxe.
RTDLDX is a scene-for-scene remake of an older chronological game from the modern era of storytelling with a whole additional storyline, so it's a good place to start, and it's also available for the switch which i'm guessing you must have! you'll find familiar characters in there (Kirby, Bandee, King Dedede, and Meta Knight), multiplayer mode, recognisable copy abilities, and an engaging story-- read as little ahead of time if you haven't already so that it can surprise and delight you!
Star Allies is the other mainline game available for the switch, and it was made as a kind of love letter to the series up until that point. it honours dozens of characters who appeared in previous games and is chock full of nostalgia and uncharacteristically blatant lore drops, but in my opinion you'll enjoy it much more if you have at least a passing idea of who all the allies are!
if you're looking for something other than games, i highly recommend this tumblr masterlist for translations of the light novels! other medias you can check out are the anime and the various mangas. all three of these are quite different to the games, and can be considered to have their own separate canons; some folks prefer one over the other, or will mix and match elements from all medias! some even like to bring in "lore" from the real life kirby cafes!
kirby as a creative playground is diverse and really beautiful; it's the only franchise i have ever created for and fandom i have participated in actually, because i've not seen another quite like it. if you're interested in being creative yourself, i do strongly recommend that you play around in your own sandbox (or with one or two friends who are also discovering kirby) for a little while first to get a feel for what you like!
i hope you'll have a fun time interacting with the franchise, and if you play any of the other games i really hope you love them!! if you want any other suggestions, feel free to reach out!
as for the question of ages, you'll find this question in particular gets western fandom a little more riled up than most. none of the characters have any canonically stated ages, and in japanese remarkably few have genders. kirby himself is specifically intended to be projected on by the player! technically, that could make kirby your age, and your gender, if you so wish!
japanese fandom generally focuses on a very wide range of characters and interconnected relationships, even including a lot of common enemy characters, and considers most of the characters to be of comparable ages; either all teens or all adults. western fandom focuses quite a lot on the much beloved meta knight and dedede partnership, and subsequently-- as romance centric fandoms do-- likes to play around with the idea of kirby and bandee as their kids or wards.
fandom will offer you everything in this regard; far future AUs, baby adoption AUs, even AUs where meta knight and dedede are children while kirby and bandee are adults! it's really entirely up to you, and my number one suggestion is to always be respectful and kind towards everyone's creative headcanons, even if they do not align with your own.
for me, i naturally project onto player characters, and so i always saw kirby and bandee as similar in age to myself. as such, because i'm an adult, they've always been adults to me, and i do like to imagine that they have grown from young adults to full adults over the course of the series! i actually was quite shocked to learn that a lot of tumblr folks thought of them as kids, but that's the fun of joining fandom the way i did, and why i recommend it! bake your own cake, and then hop online and find a million others of all different flavours you can try!
#asks#not sure what else to tag this one i am running on not quite enough sleep but this was such a sweet ask i wanted to get to it asap!#i really hope you have a wonderful time exploring Kirby!!! it's a delightful and charming franchise!!
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notebookcast.com was an experience and a half
#bandit's doodles#grian#mumbo jumbo#waffle duo#the whole time I was drawing this I was thinking about having a little grian plush#And now I want to learn to sew#i used to know but I stopped doing it a minute ago#So uh#look out for waffle duo plushes???#idk man I might not follow through but also they would be so cute :(#anyways the website was a pain#i almost just gave up on it to go find another one#But I'm dedicated#I pushed through#You can't zoom in#Theres like 8 colors#It was laggy but that was probably just me in hindsight#thats why the doodles look rushed#i wanted to get outta there ASAP#also the eraser was huge#I couldn't figure out how to change it's size like I could the pencil#Another 4.5/10#Only bangers round these parts#trust
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hiiii haha. hello. exceptionally awkward introduction bc idrk how to start something like this so let's just jump right in. im taking a break from this account for a bit. i know i said i wanted taob out before halloween and currently im fine sticking with that deadline, but if i decide i need longer away then i will take longer away. every time ive reassured people that id never abandon a fic and updates will always come eventually i never once considered that my writing and ability to feel safe and comfortable on this site would be actively taken from me, so im not even going to apologise. i dont want this either and more importantly i dont fucking deserve it. i dont know what it is in the past year, if ive hit a certain amount of followers or 'popularity' that's made it so the natural ratio of positive to negative interactions must in turn go up, but there's been a serious uptick in weird asks for me. the annoying part is that a very small amount of them are actually objectively mean and hateful, the rest are just weird and invasive from people who seemingly dont realise that's what they're being. ive reached a point where i dont care if the intentions are good. it's not my job as a 20 year old tumblr user of all things to defend the morality of someone who couldnt even bother to come off anon. unfortunately, after blocking only one or two anons, the weird asks have decreased substantially, which says all you need to know about the fascinating and exhilarating lives led by these people, but ive also gone on to turn anon asks off entirely. this is something i actively fought against doing and had to be pushed into by my mutuals (who have been the coolest people on planet earth during this entire thing). turning off anon was a big deal to me even if it sounds silly. i felt betrayed and like id been backed into a corner because it was so vehmently something i DIDNT WANT that to feel like i had to do it anyway for my own mental health??? that sucks. so even though ive 'fixed' the problem, im still kind of reeling and uncomfortable every time i come on tumblr. i hope it's just something i need time to ease because i'll truly be devastated if this becomes 'ruined' for me. tumblr exists as the only place in the world where i am honestly every facet of myself without shame or hesitation; losing that would be insanely harmful to me. and to the people who cant appeal to the actual human behind the post, let me put that in words you can understand: we wouldn't get any more writing 😦😦😦 riots and fires and sirens, i know. so yeah. to anyone who has sent me an anon ask and you're now wondering if you were part of the problem, im firmly of the belief that you'll know if you are. when i say 'weird asks' i dont mean 'you sent me a para about your personal life just to vent or ask for advice' or 'you sent me a really deep emotional compliment about the impact me and/or my writing has had on you' - i love asks like that, so much that i put off taking a break and turning off anon solely for the joy they bring me. im sorry that it might feel like you're being punished too bc of the actions of what in reality is a HANDFUL of weird people, but this is what i feel like i have to do to feel safe and not go insane every time i log in. love you guys, hopefully ill see you soon x
#seriously another shout out to my mutuals#id particularly like to say thank you to boom who's always right there for me no matter what's happening or how insane im being#and also everyone in our little discord that wound up having to make a whole new channel for venting#bc i was there so often like 'today's weird ask isssss.... telling me about my cupsize!! rip them to shreds!!!'#hannah and theo especially being there and pushing me to finally turn off anon. war is truly over#and of course rori bc the shamelessness u show when hating on my anon asks has been genuinely really cathartic#sometimes u really do just need a rottweiler mutual to tell random people online to kill themselves 😭#okay weird oscar acceptance speechcore gratitude over. i do just rlly love my mutuals#like i went three years not telling anyone about the worse side of internet popularity for fear of looking spoiled and ungrateful#so for the first time to open up about it and be met with outrage on my behalf and people saying in fact it's MORE fucked up#than i initially realised bc ive grown desensitised to it is. yeah cathartic i guess#they are singlehandedly reassuring me of the good this cursed app still holds#so everyone thank them and send them flowers NOW#okay im done i think. see you guys soon. i truly do want to come back asap bc like i said i NEVER EVEN WANTED TO FUCKING LEAVE#SOME ASSHOLES JUST HAD TO PUT GRENADES ON WHAT I ASSUMED WERE VERY UNIVERSAL AND OBVIOUS BOUNDARIES#if you're reading this like 'ohhh fuck i defo sent something invasive lately. i thought it was a joke/we were friends'#then 1) we arent friends if you're on anon. it immediately creates a power imbalance where you know me and any necessary context#but i have no idea who you are or how much you know about me. that's already a fucked dynamic#and 2) I HOPE YOU FEEL BAD. LIKE GENUINELY I HOPE YOU FEEL AWFUL AND HAVE A GOOD LONG LOOK AT YOURSELF#okay i think that's all. ta-ra lads??? how tf do u end something like this#ive queued this to reblog a couple more times throughout the day
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