#but I just don't know what to do and everything is annoying me and I just AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

[jeannyjaykaydeh]

Merry Sinsmas

Alastor x Reader

Just a little thought I'd like to share with you because I’m in the Christmas mood.

I hope you enjoy reading it and if you celebrate Christmas: I wish you a Merry Christmas. And if you don't: I hope you have a great few days anyway. :)

And to all of you: Merry Sinsmas. :D

Warning: I hope you don't mind that this short story briefly mentions that you are from Germany. If you can't identify with this, just see this sentence as a joke to wriggle out of a situation.

—————————————————————————

You're standing in the hotel lobby with a clipboard in your hand, working through a to-do list. You are in the middle of your Christmas preparations. Charlie and Vaggie are busy decorating the big tree in the centre of the lobby next to the stairs, Niffty is cleaning and judging by her crazy laugh, she's in a very Christmassy mood.

Lucifer is tending to the fairy lights, Husk is making punch for everyone and Angel and Cherri Bomb are getting the sound system ready.

As you stare at your clipboard, thinking about what you could do next, you notice out of the corner of your eye a shadow rise from the floor and stand next to you.

You don't even have to lift your eyes to realise that it's Alastor, standing so close to you that his large body is pressed against you.

You hear a snap of fingers, but you skilfully ignore it.

You're too busy dealing with the fact that the radio demon is invading your comfort zone - as he so often does.

It doesn't take long before he clears his throat meaningfully, inviting you to give him your attention.

So you raise your eyes and suppress your annoyed expression as best you can.

You look at him expectantly. What does he want?

He looks down at you with a mischievous smile. Then he takes a quick look at the ceiling before his eyes wander back to you.

You look up and see a sprig of mistletoe hanging directly above you, obviously conjured up by him.

You sigh slightly.

So he wants to be kissed.

Alastor is really trying everything he can to get to you. You realise that he's been trying to make advances to you for months and win your heart with small - and also very large - gestures.

What you keep to yourself the whole time: He won your heart a long time ago. But you don't want to admit it.

Yes, you fancy Alastor - oh, you're so in love with him!

But your fear of commitment and the fact that he's one of the most dangerous demons here in hell stop you from getting involved with him.

Much to the displeasure of your friends, because the tension between Alastor and you has left its mark on them too and now they really want to see you two as a couple.

"Hahaaaa, there's a little green branch hanging right above us. What funny coincidences there are, aren't there, my dear?" he says euphorically in his radio filter voice.

"Real coincidences, yes," you reply sarcastically and leave it at that. At least that's what you try to do, but there's no way Alastor will let you get away with it.

He steps closer to you - it's hard to believe that's still possible - leans forward slightly and says: "You know I'm a man of tradition. In my day, we followed every custom without even batting an eyelid. It would be a shame for me and my inner well-being if you didn't appreciate my traditions, sweetheart."

You give him a wry, cheeky grin. Then you turn away from him and say: "Well, it's just a shame that I'm from Germany and this mistletoe tradition isn't practised there."

You move away from him and leave him standing there in his indignant static noise.

"OH NO, DON'T EVEN THINK ABOUT IT!" Angel suddenly shouts across the lobby. He jumps up from his chair and stomps angrily towards you, grabs you by the shoulders, spins you around and pushes you back on your heels under the mistletoe, where he sets you down right in front of the radio demon.

He grumbles: "We're not in fucking Germany here, we're in hell! And here ya don't just kiss under the mistletoe, here ya even fuck when ye're standin' under it! So do yerself and us a favour and respect our traditions! Ya kiss that creepy man now, understand?"

[laswells-ashtray]

Imagine the 141 getting to meet Sergeant Price?? Like, Time Machine type shit or they were around when he was still young. Either way, they got to see how chaotic and truly reckless their captain was in his younger days(as well as how in love he and Nik were)

I went for a slightly different route and I hope you don't mind, I just couldn't get my mind to cooperate with time travel so I went with a weird chemical that de-ages you and boom, young John. [I wanna add because I don't like how I worded something here, I'm not saying Sergeant Price is 18, I'm saying he likes it I just can't articulate this one sentence the way I want to.]

Pushing himself up into a sitting position with a groan, Ghost tries to take in his surroundings. His eyes feel like they've been glued shut and then ripped open, his left shoulder aches and the hilt of one of his knives is digging into his hip. He watches Soap and Gaz do the same as him, glancing around their surroundings with a look of questioning.

They'd been fine until one lone man had sprung round a corner and launched something at them. It'd moved too fast for Ghost to get a glimpse of what it was before it smacked against Price's chest and then there had been a bang before he'd woken up in his arse. Nothing around them was destroyed so it couldn't have been an explosion, what the fuck was it?

He jolts up suddenly, ignoring the throbbing pain in his shoulder as he looks over to where John had been standing. He's still unconscious but he seems relatively unharmed until Ghost's eyes drift up to his face.

He rubs a hand over his eyes, smearing them with eyeblack and catching his hands on a rough edge of his mask that he's yet to file down and fix. It changes nothing. He remains the same as he had before, clean-shaven. He not so gracefully shifts across the floor closer to the captain, gaining the two attention of the two sergeants.

It certainly looks like John, he's sure of that but there appears to be a slight problem. It might be the fact that he looks around 18, that could be it. Ghost knows that he might be hallucinating but it feels too real. He's seen pictures of a young, Sergeant Price before. Bit of a baby face until he'd committed to the beard, went from looking like a teenager to Robert Shaw in Jaws. And this looks exactly like Price pre-beard.

He can feel Gaz's hand on his shoulder as they peer down at the body in front of them and Soap's soft, barely audible "wit the fuck". So, they're all seeing it.

There's a grumble before Price? throws himself into a sitting position and scans the room, eyes stopping on the three of them. Watching the scowl form on his face as he eyes them all with confusion is almost comical.

"Who the fuck are you lot?"

Well, he has the same amount of tact that John typically has.

"Who are you?" Gaz blurts out, looking the younger man up and down.

The man seems to quickly identify them as British and SAS but it does little to quell the obvious suspicion he regards them with. "Sergeant John Price, now are you gonna tell me who you are or keep standing there like a spare prick at a whore's wedding?"

Bloody hell.

Soap's snort is obnoxious in the quiet atmosphere of the room but Ghost can't bring himself to feel annoyed about it, if he wasn't used to half of the bullshit they do then he'd probably be in fits of hysterical laughter by now.

"You sure about that?" Ghost asks him, watching the man through narrowed eyes. It'd be no good to let him know that Ghost was equally confused as he was.

Maybe John rolls his eyes, glaring at Ghost as he takes in the view of the masked man in front of him before letting out a soft, amused huff.

"You're a fuckin big lad, int ye, Skeletor? Yes, I'm sure. I know who I bloody well am."

He can't be John, he can't be. But it's so much like him, the abruptness, the demeanour and the look. He's everything like the pictures Ghost has seen and the stories he's heard from Nikolai and Kate.

"Prove it," John had told him the story once while drunk and had completely forgotten about it after, Simon had never brought it up again. He liked to pretend that they'd both forgotten about it. "scar on your shoulder blade, where did it come from?"

He refuses to feel bad about how the younger man's face falls before he can hide it with a look of anger. "Courtesy of a bottle of Johnnie Walker's finest in my old man's clumsy hands. And how the fuck does a cunt like you know that?"

It's John. It's fucking Price. It's his captain, but it isn't.

He ignores the sharp inhale from one of the sergeants behind him as he leans in closer to John, pretending not to notice how the younger man's hands clench into fists.

"You're our captain, or you're supposed to be until someone lopped something at you and now you're a bloody sergeant." There's no proper way to explain it, is there? The younger man will never believe him.

John stares blankly back at him before eventually asking a question, "Is this Mac trying to take the piss because he's annoyed about the dent in his car? The crabbit git."

Soap answers before he has the chance to,

"I'm afraid we don't ken anyhin aboot Mac or his motor, mate. And we're no rippin the piss."

The disbelief is obvious as John snorts and crosses his arms, looking far to amused at Soap's words.

"He even got another Scot to do it. Good on the bastard, I'll finally stop hearing about the amount of "smarmy Englishmen" on base. Tell me, William Wallace, where did he find you?"

The thought strikes Ghost and he's glad the balaclava hides the smirk on his face, it appears that every variation of John Price is a bit of a wanker.

Added thought is just Sergeant Price meeting current-day Nikolai and walking away because he isn't getting caught with a hard-on by the man he'd been shagging two days ago back when said man was almost twenty years younger.

[howi99]

A Knight second chance 7

Yang: *surprised to see Jaune sitting at the dock* Jaune! *Walk to him*

Jaune: *looking back at Yang* Yang? What... Wait, did Blake run away? Is this why you are here?

Yang: What? Why would she run away? *Shaking her head* Wait no, don't change the subject! Do you know how much dust i had to use to find you!?

Jaune: *surprised* Finding me? Why?

Yang: *frowning* We found a girl crying her eyes out while saying your name! What the hell happened!?

Jaune: A girl cryi- *realising who She's talking about* P-Penny!? Why was she crying?!

Yang: She keeps saying something about a bridge and how she was sorry to have asked you to do something.

Jaune: *realising what happened* Oh no, no no no nO NO! *Getting up quickly* I was so stressed, i probably used my semblance on her without knowing!

Yang: *surprised* Stressed? By her? What, did she try attacking you?

Jaune: *shaking his head, distraught* No! Oh heaven no! She's the sweetest girl i know! She wouldn't hurt a fly! W-where is she!?

Yang: With Ruby at the park near the airport, but-

Jaune: *start sprinting in that direction*

Yang: J-Jaune, wait! We can use bumble- and he's gone... Damn he's fast.

___________________________________________

Ruby: *looking up at the Atlesian specialist* ... Are you related to Weiss by any chance?

Winter: *Looking at Penny with a stunned expression* ... She's crying?

Ruby: *nervous* I found her like this, i swear! A-and she refused to move from my side since! *Wriggling a bit* ... I kinda need to use the bathro- *sees Jaune running towards them* J-Jaune?!

Penny: *looking up, seeing the knight stressed expression* Jau-

Jaune: *hugging the broken girl, using his aura to heal her mind* It's ok! It's okay, i'm here now, it wasn't your fault.

Penny: *hugging back the knight* J-Jaune, i saw everything, I FELT EVERYTHING! I NEVER SHOULD HAVE ASKED YOU THIS!

Winter: *unsheathing her sword, pointing it towards Jaune* What did you do to her!

Jaune: *not looking at Winter* My semblance... I use my soul to heal and amplify others.

Winter: *frowning* That doesn't explain-

Jaune: *annoyed* What part of using my own soul, my memories and feelings don't you get?! She just lived through my most traumatic memories because i wasn't in control!

Ruby: *looking at her friend with worry* Jaune... Are you... Are you alright?

Jaune: ... I'm better than i was. Now let me fix her... *Looking up at Winter* Please...

Winter: ... *Sigh* You will have to answer to my superior afterward.

___________________________________________

Ironwood: *blinking, seeing Penny glued to Jaune's side* ... *Goes to speak*

Jaune: If i let her go for even a second, i will have to go back to square one.

Ironwood: ... And how long will it takes?

Jaune: *sigh* A day... Maybe two.

Ironwood: *frowning* That won't be-

Jaune: I already know she's a robot, general. My soul is currently inside of every single bolt of her.

Ozpin: *cocking one eyebrow* A robot you say? *Eyeing Ironwood* Interesting.

Ironwood: That was classified information.

Jaune: ... General, Penny's eyes can glow in the dark and her swords are connected to her back. She even have lasers. It would be a miracle if nobody saw through the disguise.

Ironwood: ...

Penny: *looking a lot better* General, it wasn't friend Jaune's fault if the accident happened. I should have listened to him and backed away when he asked for it. Please, do not punish him for my mistake..

Ironwood: ... *Sigh* I wasn't planning to punish him. Accident happens all the time.

Ozpin: *serious* However, Jaune's mental health could become a problem. *Looking at Jaune* Henceforth, you are expected to see the school psychologist. Is this fine with you?

Jaune: I... *Sigh* Yes, that's fine...

[lottins-only]

CROSS THE LINE II | Jude Bellingham

pairing: jude bellingham x fem!reader, unnamed fictional RM player x fem!reader

word count: 2.5k

summary: after a fallout with your boyfriend, you find solace in a spontaneous night at the movies, where you run into his golden boy teammate. one thing leads to another and you cross the line. what happens next?

A/N: happy holidays yall 🥳 lmk what you guys think!! <3

warnings: infidelity (once again, i don't condone it. 🫣), non explicit smut

PART ONE

before all of this, you’d always imagined an affair as something out of a movie: clandestine meetings, tensions running high, stolen moments, secret rendezvous. but in reality, it’s messier, quieter. it’s second guessing yourself every step of the way, staring at your reflection and admitting you’re a horrible person time and time again, and then doing it anyway. 

it doesn’t start with a bang, no dramatic explosion of passion. after the night at the cinema, things unfold slowly. you text every single day for weeks, conversations ranging from the mundane to the deep. you learn about each other, piece by piece. and jude, you realize, is like quicksand. the more you discover, the deeper you sink. he’s too funny, too kind, too good. unfairly handsome, and somehow better for it.

he has an uncanny way of making you unravel. of making you open up so easily that sometimes you don't notice it's happening. you, usually reserved and guarded, find yourself sharing without hesitation. you suppose its the way there's no judgement from him, no disinterest or impatience.

and then there’s the way he lets you in. with every detail he shares, every message, he pulls you in like a magnet you can’t resist. he tells you about the running joke he’s had with his best friend for years, humor inexplicable to anyone but the two of them. the trivial argument he had with his brother that was inconsequential but still annoying enough to stick in his mind. his new favorite song, sent with a note about how it makes him feel. formative memories he’ll never forget, now shared with you. it’s as though he’s placing his heart on a silver platter, daring you: know me. know me and want me.  

and you do. want him, that is.

that’s the exact reason why you find yourself in his bed one afternoon. 

his room is dimly lit, the curtains drawn against the waning sun. you sit on the edge of the bed, your hands twisting in your lap, nerves running high. jude sits beside you, eyes locked on yours, searching for the final hint of hesitation. a sign that you might leave. but you don’t move. you can’t.

when he leans in, his fingers brushing against your cheek, it feels inevitable. of course you’re here, with him. where else would you be? his touch is warm, grounding, and when his lips finally meet yours, it feels like everything that’s ever happened in the world has led to this moment.

his hands find your waist, sliding under your shirt as the kiss deepens. his touch is firm and warm, yet capable of sending shivers down your spine. you don’t stop him when he pulls your shirt over your head or when his lips trail down your neck, leaving your skin tingling.

 “what are we doing?” you murmur almost to yourself as he bites on a sensitive spot. 

jude pulls back just enough to look at you, his eyes dark and full of desire, but there’s something else there too: something deeper, more vulnerable. 

“whatever you want” he says, his voice low, his hand grazing your cheek tenderly. “i want this. i want you”

you nod wordlessly, and the rest happens in a blur. his weight presses you into the mattress, his skin warm under your fingertips as you trace the muscles of his back. he kisses you like he can’t help himself, and you kiss him back just as desperately. plush lips and calloused hands taking their liberties, roaming all over your body, eliciting sounds and sensations you’ve never experienced with anyone else. you don’t hold back either, not when his golden brown skin is all yours to explore, to kiss, to bite. to revel in. 

he moves against you, his hands gripping your hips as you arch into him. there’s nothing slow or tentative about it now. his movements are purposeful and you meet him with equal attention . when he finally pushes inside you, you let out a rush of breath, almost like a sigh of relief. it’s overwhelming, the way he fits perfectly inside of you, the way it feels familiar and routine, like he’s done this a hundred times before. 

the room is filled with the sound of your heavy breathing, the creak of the mattress as he rhythmically thrusts into you, his low murmurs against your skin that range from curses to your name to soft groans. your nails dig into his back, and he doesn’t flinch, only moves harder, deeper, his focus entirely on you. “you feel so perfect, so good” he whispers, like its a confession he’s been waiting to make for the longest time. 

you don’t think about the guilt or the consequences. there’s only jude, the way he feels, the way he moves. for now, that’s all that matters.

afterwards, you lie in bed, your head on his chest, his hand softly grazing your now frizzy curls. his heartbeat is steady beneath your ear, a comforting sound. 

“so,” you say, breaking the silence as you trace his chiseled chest with your finger. “you won’t believe what happened at work today. this guy left his mic on during a teams meeting and got caught badmouthing our boss.”

jude’s chest vibrates beneath you as he laughs silently. “no way. what did he say?”

you tell the story, and he listens intently, chuckling softly. you think two things: first, never in your life did you imagine having pillow talk with jude bellingham. and second, the knowledge that you made him laugh gives you such a rush of serotonin you want do it over and over again.

seasons change, your situation doesn’t. months go by and jude and you are sneaking around. no one knows, not even your closest friend or your mother– people who know you better than anyone, people who love and accept the parts of you that you consider deeply embarrassing and shameful. you don’t share this, because it’s different. this secret is well and truly a condemnation of your character. but that doesn’t mean you want to stop.  

you find yourself at a real madrid christmas party one evening. you’re there with your boyfriend, of course. the man who feels more and more like a stranger as the days go by. the man in whose phone, just last night, you’d found incriminating dms with an instagram model. it hadn’t fazed you. after all, you were doing the same.

you sip on a glass of champagne, watching jude from across the room. he’s in his element, charming everyone from the staff to the players to the wags. his laugh carries over to where you’re standing, the butterflies in your stomach fluttering at the sound. 

and yet, despite all the mingling, he hasn’t approached you.

you hate yourself for keeping track, but you’ve noticed. he’s made his rounds, talking to everyone, making small talk that leaves people grinning. but you? not a glance, not a word. it’s like you’re invisible.

you can’t help but feel a pang of jealousy as you watch a group of wags giggling at something he says, leaning in closer as if trying to soak up his presence. your nails dig into the stem of your glass, and you have to remind yourself to breathe.

“you okay?” your boyfriend asks, his hand resting lightly on your lower back. you must be having a very visible reaction for even him to notice.

“fine” you lie, forcing a smile. don’t touch me, is what you really want to say.

you’re not fine though. not as you steal another glance at jude, who’s now leaning against the bar, talking to vini. he looks relaxed, like he hasn’t a care in the world, like he doesn’t feel the tension that’s suffocating you.

you tell yourself it’s better this way. no one is gonna suspect anything if he avoids you. but still, it stings.

and then, as if he senses your eyes on him, he finally looks your way. the moment is brief, a flicker of recognition  before he looks away quickly, returning his attention to vini like nothing happened.

the champagne in your glass suddenly feels too heavy, and you set it down on the nearest table before excusing yourself to the restroom.

Inside the rest room, you splash cold water on your face, hoping it will calm the heat in your chest, the ache in your gut. but it doesn’t.

the sound of the restroom door opening makes you freeze. you glance up and flinch when you see jude.he steps inside, shutting the door quietly behind him, his eyes locking on yours immediately.

you watch silently as he leans back against the door, his hands shoved into the pockets of his suit pants. he looks calm but his jaw is visibly clenched. 

“you’ve been avoiding me” you blurt out before you can stop yourself.

“i had to” he replies, his voice low. “you know why”

you do know why. but that doesn’t make it hurt any less.

“you talked to everyone in that room except me” you continue, voice sharper than you expect. “it’s like i don’t even exist to you”

“you think i wanted to ignore you? do you know how hard it is to be in the same room as you and pretend like–” he cuts himself off, hands rubbing the back of his neck.

“pretend like what?” 

“like i don’t want you,” he says, the words coming out in a rush. “like i don’t think about you all the time. like i’m not going crazy knowing you’re here with him”

“then why avoid me?” you ask, your voice trembling.

“because if i talked to you” he says, stepping even closer. “if i got too close, i don’t know if i could stop myself”

your lips meet just then, as if drawn together like magnets. you kiss fiercely, desperately. his hands find your waist, pulling you flush against him. you can taste the sweet champagne on his lips, can feel the heat from his warm hands. when you pull away, you’re breathless, but you feel renewed. like touching him made up for the fact that you had to put up with your boyfriend for the whole evening. 

“i’m breaking up with him tonight” you blurt. “I found out he’s been cheating”

“what an asshole” jude says without skipping a beat.

you laugh bitterly as you adjust the top of his turtleneck. “i’m doing the same thing”

jude smirks. “yeah, bit hypocritical isn’t it?” he says, and you both burst out laughing, the sound echoing loudly in the bathroom. 

you sit with it for a bit, the weight of your actions settling in between you two, both of you knowing what an awful thing you’re doing. you, to someone who’s been a partner of yours for some time. him, to his teammate who he doesn’t particularly like, but still owes some loyalty to, some obligation of decency.

“i don’t regret it” he says quietly, as if reading your thoughts. he grabs your hand and enterwines your fingers.  “i don’t regret any of it”

“me too” you murmur. and you mean it. 

that night, you keep your word and dump your boyfriend. it's an anti climactic ending, both of you mentally checked out of the relationship in the end to even care. still, you feel the weight lifting off your shoulder. good riddance.

that's how an affair with your boyfriend’s teammate unfolds and then ends. if you’re wondering how a relationship with your ex’s teammate begins, here it is: first, you scrub any trace of your previous relationship off the internet (you were always pretty private anyway). then, you gaslight everyone who knows all three of you into believing the relationship was never that serious, so what's the harm if you're seeing the other guy now? stranger things have happened. thankfully said ex-boyfriend conveniently leaves the team and the country at the end of the season, so it makes things easier for you. third step is to keep a careful distance from your new man in public for several months to maintain the illusion that there was no overlap with your past... relationship? situationship? or was it friendship? we’ll never know. finally, hard launch on a sunny afternoon at one of your favorite cafes in madrid, on a random wednesday in late summer. that’s how you do it.

so here you are, seated across from each other. you sip on a latte; jude’s having tea. he’s just come back from an adidas shoot, and he’s exhausted, you can tell by the tired smile on his face and by the way his body is slouched slightly in his chair. the only expression of affection he can muster is the soft brush of his leg against yours under the table. 

you chat about the book you’re currently reading, how the price of pastries in the cafe are atrociously high. yet again, you marvel at how easy it is with him. talking, laughing, slipping into comfortable silences. its like you’ve known him for years. 

“someone’s taking a pic” he nods towards someone behind you. you don’t look back, just smile softly. “going according to plan” he murmurs, taking a sip of his tea. 

you’re silent, thinking about how luckly you are, to have him, to be with him. you continue to chat, and now you’re on the topic of the show you’re watching. jude confesses he watched an episode without you on the plane back from an away game, and you gasp indignantly, kicking his leg under the table. 

“ow” he mutters. “i couldn’t sleep!”

“you couldn't watch anything else?” you say, dabbing at a coffee stain that had tainted the sleeve of your shirt. When you look up, jude’s looking at you with such a tender look on his face that you want to look away. 

“what?” you say, half self consciously. 

“nothing” he grins. “its just that you’re so beautiful. everytime i look at you it gets better”

your stomach is immediately filled with butterflies, and all you can do is grin back at him shyly, cheeks heating up from his words. sometimes being with him feels like you’re on a rollercoaster ride, in a good way. except the rush you get is from basking in his warmth, in his love, in his presence. 

needless to say it was all worth it in the end. thank god for late night cinema trips. 

[maxdibert]

Agree with your last post. I'm so annoyed by people putting Pandora with Regulus, Barty and Evan or Dorcas with the Slytherin gang or idk what else. Like Pandora was Luna's mother, why are they making her to be friends with canon death eaters? Dorcas was killed by Voldemort personally, why are they making her to be so young? Idk it's making me sad that people don't even try to respect the canon story and its characters and expand upon that. Instead they completely butcher it. I understand having fun but these headcanons have completely overshadowed the correct information we have and people now pretend like they have some canon merit.

Pandora is Luna's mother, and that's all we know about her. At what point does she magically end up being the same age as the Marauders? Why turn her into a Rosier? Where did the ridiculous idea come from that she was best friends with Barty Crouch Jr.? Like, hello? She's not Luna's mother; she's just an OC someone made up to fit their narrative, and they justify her existence by saying she’ll eventually become that Pandora. End of story. Like everything they write and do. Their Marauders aren't the real Marauders. That's not James; it's some random guy they invented and slapped his name on, and the same goes for the rest of them. What even is a Dorcas Meadowes? Is that something you can eat? And what's a Marlene McKinnon? Nobody cares—they're not real characters. We don’t care about them, especially if you only include them to hit a lesbian target audience or so the stories aren’t overwhelmingly male-centered and ridiculously problematic because the female presence and relevance don’t even hit the minimum gender quotas from two decades ago, like…

They say "fuck canon," but only to have an excuse to whitewash psychopaths and portray them as twink icons. It makes no sense. I insist: they could create their own lore within the Harry Potter universe. Take all those OCs, remove the canon names of characters they have nothing in common with, give them original and unique names, and create a new category on AO3 for the lore you've created. You wouldn’t be the first to do it, and it’s totally valid. And stop setting the stories in the '70s because all those OCs with canon names act like Gen Z kids—or even Gen Alphas—living in pre-Thatcher Britain, like, what the hell?

The best thing about the First Wizarding War universe years ago was that the CANON was unexplored, and you could create fascinating things. But always based on the CANON. Because no, “fuck canon” doesn’t work, because if you say “fuck canon,” then you're just talking about characters you don’t like. You say you’re a fan of Sirius Black, but you’re not a fan of Sirius Black. You’re a fan of an original fanfic character with traits that have nothing to do with Sirius Black, but you slapped his name on it—why? Sirius Black was the tallest, most handsome, and most masculine and violent of the Marauders in canon. He wasn’t a girly, whiny twink. Rowling spends the ENTIRE saga CONSTANTLY emphasizing how masculine, how macho, how handsome, how masculine, how handsome, and (again) how masculine Sirius Black was. Over and over. The only other character Rowling insists so much on describing physically is Snape, but only to constantly point out how ugly he is and ironically assign him FEMININE traits. Snape, who is canonically unattractive but also canonically not masculine by patriarchal standards, is someone super macho types like Sirius mocked precisely for that.

I think the problem with this fandom is that they want to be the protagonists, the cool kids, the main characters everyone admires. But the reality of the canon is that both the Marauders and the pure-blood Slytherins of the era would have hated, mocked, and marginalized people with the characteristics fans assign to these characters in fandom. That Sirius the fandom adores wouldn’t have lasted half an hour with the real teenage Sirius Black, who would have bullied him immediately for being “weird.” The fandom’s James would have been ridiculed by canon James, who would’ve seen him as a total loser. Fandom Barty? Canon Barty would’ve Crucio’d him to bits. Canon Regulus would’ve paid someone to drown fandom Regulus. And yes, that Severus fandom invented—a sort of rapist or something—would’ve disgusted canon Severus, who didn’t even dare say anything to Lily. But honestly, who’s that fandom Lily? Because canon Lily didn’t know what feminism was and was dying to have a traditional family before 20 with a rich guy who could give her financial stability. Like, seriously, xD.

I’m sorry, but your OCs wouldn’t last half an hour in '70s Hogwarts because both sides would tear them to pieces. And in the end, all the “fuck canon” rhetoric is just a way to deny that they need to project themselves as protagonists, but they know they never would be in the Marauders’ lore because, in that context, they’d end up as bad or worse than Snape. And that’s precisely why they hate Snape so much—because that character constantly reminds them that, in fact, the Marauders were bullies. And they were bullies to those who didn’t have the looks, social class, appearance, or clothes deemed acceptable. Snape is actually the closest thing to themselves that fans of the Marauders will ever find, and that reminds them that in that universe, they would’ve been the nerds, losers, and outcasts of the class.

I’m sorry for being so harsh, but it’s true. They’ve invented characters in their own image, slapped canon names on them to feel important and central, but the reality is that the actual canon characters would’ve bullied them so much they’d have ended up the same or worse than Snape.

[genderqueerdykes]

its so funny when people see an inclusionist who is part of like, every possible oppressed minority within oppressed minority groups, and then they say something inclusionist that They Specifically are against and they go like "what the hell. i thought u were better than this. i expected you to not have empathy for The Bad People." its ridiculous anyway thanks for being so chill and always open minded ur blog makes me feel safe

it makes me want to bite a chunk out of my desk

i've had this happen to me so many times over xyz thing and it baffles me. i don't get why people think that just because they like my vibe that it means that i'll agree with everything they have to say. and i really don't like it when someone struts into my ask box acting like they have pity for me, or are "scared" for me for "not knowing better". it actually pisses me the fuck off that people think they know what's best for me.

i do not understand why people look at how inclusive i am and go. i bet equinox hates (marginalized group). on what planet? i'm intersex. i'm trans. i'm bisexual. i'm biracial. i'm disabled. i'm neurodivergent. i'm mentally ill. i'm poor. i've been chronically homeless. like i could keep going. why do people think that i harbor hatred in my heart like this? i don't. i don't want anything to do with your hatred and looking down on people

i don't look down on people. i think that's what irritates me the most is when someone projects how they look down on others on to me. keep that to yourself. i'm not in the business of looking down on people who haven't harmed anyone. people really have to learn that something irritating them isn't harming them. getting annoyed is not the same as being harmed.

i don't entertain people like that because i do not owe someone i disagree with validation. i am not humoring people who think it's okay to be an asshole. if i'm well known for not being an asshole, what the hell makes people think i'll change just for them? get real. i'm not going to start excluding random groups of people from communities they rightfully occupy. maybe i just have too much lived experience, but i'm not narrow minded, and my goal in life isn't to make people feel like shit. my goal in life is to help people. hating a marginalized group will never be helping anyone

thank you for this message, genuinely, because the amount of people who have crawled into my ask box lately with the most bullshit exclusionist takes thinking that for some reason, i'll bend to pat them, in specific, on the back, has been staggering. idk why people think that i inherently agree with them just because they agree with me. i'm not your weird little yes man to pat you on the back and give you validation. i'm a person with my own thoughts.

take care of yourself, thank you so much for the kind words! i appreciate it more than i could ever express

[irrealisms]

ok im gonna pass out now but i transcribed a decent chunk (5 minutes/1k words) of vitalasy & zam's conversation from yesterday! transcript under the cut

Vitalasy: Hi. 

Zam: Hi. Okay. I've got a couple questions for you—

Vitalasy (overlapping): What’s going on?

Zam: I'm a little nervous.

Vitalasy: Okay

Zam: But, yeah. I don't know! Okay. when I think about my, like— my relationship with you on the server, right? it's a little, it's a little complicated, right, it's a little— little tricky, right? you know? We've had a lot of…tension, at times, or a lot of times where I wanted to kill you and you wanted to kill me and of course there was the time where… I ended up betraying you of course, and just— a lot that I've been thinking about a lot recently, and… I just, I don't know. I— I don't know, I just want you to know that… I'm sorry, and that (giggles) I don't know, I, it feels like— I I don't really know how to word this. but like— I don't know. A lot's changed since then, and I wanted you to know that. I really wanted you to know that, you know? I'm very different person now, so. I don't know. (pause) I'm really bad at this whole communicating thing, but, um—

Vitalasy (laughing): I mean, that— that's something that has stayed the same, then.

Zam (also laughing): Yep, yeah. Didn't improve in that r- I mean, I've improved a little bit—

Vitalasy: Maybe it goes both ways here, though.

Zam: Yeah, I don’t know. But, um, I wanted to show you something, okay? Because last time you were on the server, right? it was, like, during the abyss, right? or, I guess—other than this season, of course—but like—it was like, sort of abyss related?

Vitalasy: Yeah.

Zam: After— after you gave all your stuff to Jumper, um, after you gave all your stuff to Jumper and left the server, um… I— and like, she betrayed us, I kind of went on this whole, like, arc where I wanted to blow everything up on the server— specifically your base, um—

Vitalasy (overlapping): Wh— (splutters) I was gone! 

Zam: because I knew it meant a lot to Jum— 

Vitalasy (overlapping): What do you mean?

Zam: Well, it's because— it was to hurt Jumper, specifically, for betraying me, um—

Vitalasy: Okay.

Zam: And, again, a lot has changed since then, I'm not— I don't, that's not who I am anymore, and I want to show you that that's not who I am anymore, (breaks the slab in the corner revealing a water stream going down) so— I've built you a little present—

Vitalasy: Last time I— last time I followed you down a hole, I died.

Zam: (splutters) Th-th—that's not— okay— no,

Vitalasy: Let that be clear.

Zam: Not important! I—I— it's different. It's different this time, there's water and I'm down here. Just come on down! (pause; Vitalasy starts coming down the water stream) You can put your armor on if you want, but I mean, it's fine if you don't, it's cool. But, yeah. I don't know! Derapchu told me that I should build something—or, no, I think it was Kaboodle actually—said that, every single build that I have on the server, or, like, every place that means a lot to me, is, like, out in the open, right? Um, so I wanted to build something that meant a lot to me but wasn’t out in the open, so I've had this little area for like the past couple months and I just come here every now and then whenever I need to think and figure stuff out and I've really wanted to show it to you. for, like, a while now. (pause) So like, yeah.

Vitalasy: Zam.

Zam: mhm? …Cool.

Vitalasy: Cool.

Zam: (laughs) (sniffs) I'm sorry.

Vitalasy: Oh my God—wait. I need to— hold on, my camera is being annoying right now. But—

Zam: mhm. 

(pause)

Vitalasy: Wait (inarticulate noise) Okay. Okay okay okay. 

(pause)

Zam: So, like. Yeah.

Vitalasy: Zam, I don't— I don't know what to— 

(pause)

Zam: What?

Vitalasy: When I think back on my favorite story

Zam: Mhm

Vitalasy: That I've done on lifesteal, 

Zam: Mhm.

Vitalasy: I— think and talk about Eclipse Federation.

Zam: (noise; halfway between an exhale and a ‘hahh’?)

Vitalasy: Without a doubt, like— 

Zam: mhm.

Vitalasy: I talk about it to— we're gonna, (stage whisper/exaggerated weird voice) I talk about it to my admissions officer, um—

Zam: Really?

Vitalasy: For college, yeah

(they both laugh a little)

Zam: Damn!

Vitalasy: Like, this was part of my, my, uh, college application season, ummm—

Zam: (laughs a lot) That's actually really cool. 

Vitalasy: Yeah, like— really, if I'm gonna be so honest, I— I have very few regrets, and… this is not one of them.

Zam: Awwwwwwww.

Vitalasy: I, I don't, I don't regret anything that happened.

Zam: Okay.

Vitalasy: And, um—back then—

Zam: I do. I feel like you were right and I was wrong. But, yeah.

Vitalasy: No! No no no. I don't—I don't—I don't say that as a, I don't regret it because I was right, that's not what I'm trying to say, um—

Zam: I know. But like— I don't know, it's just like, I don't get to see you that often, so—it's just—I really, I wanted you to know that I feel like you were right and that I was wrong, and.

Vitalasy: (laughs) Come on.

Zam: I just like, I just wanted to say that—

Vitalasy: No, no, no. I'm not taking that. No, no, I'm not taking that! Are you kidding me?!

Zam: What do you mean?

Vitalasy: You can't say that! What? (punches Zam)

Zam: Okay…? (laughs) Okay.

Vitalasy: (punches Zam again) ‘Cause that's not true! That's not true.

Zam: Okay.

Vitalasy: I, I hid stuff from you.

Zam: …Uh-huh.

Vitalasy: Like, let that be so clear. And I'm glad we're, we're actually talking about it now— (looks around at the room) it's so weird, ‘cause like my worlds are kind of combining right now, (Zam laughs) but, um— (Vitalasy laughs) uhh

Zam: Yeah. Damn. Yeah, I don't know. I've just— missed you a lot and I'm really glad that you're back. Even if it's only for a little bit. (pause) So yeah.

(pause)

Vitalasy: We should play more. (punches Zam)

Zam: Yeah! That’d be cool, I’d be down. 

Vitalasy: Yeah.

Zam: Yeah, for sure. I would love to see you around more, if you ever—could, I don’t know.

(pause)

Vitalasy: Yeah.

Zam: Yeah.

Vitalasy: We should see each other more. (punches Zam) We should see each other more.

Zam: Okay! I’m cool with that, yeah, of course.

Vitalasy: Yeah yeah yeah.

Zam: I really wanted to—yeah.

Vitalasy: (punches Zam) Let’s talk offstream. I, I think I have a couple ideas.

Zam: Okay, cool! I'm down, yeah. Alright.

[allthingsfangirl101]

Bother Me – Glen Powell

I knocked on his door and nervously waited. I shook my head when I realized I was always doing this. Whenever something goes wrong or needs fixing in my apartment, I go to my neighbor, Glen Powell.

Back when I first moved in next door to Glen, he wasn't a big actor yet. He'd had smaller roles but nothing that made him noticed. We became friends in the laundry room when I asked to borrow one of his dryer sheets. We ran into each other a week later and I gave him a dryer sheet to pay him back. We quickly found that we always do laundry on the same night.

"Hey, Y/N," Glen smiled as he opened his door. "What's up?"

"Sorry to bother you," I sighed, "but I was wondering if you could help me with something."

"Anything."

"One of the light bulbs in my fan is out and I can't get the cover off," I explained.

"Easy," he smiled. He left his apartment and followed me back to my apartment. I showed him what fan I was talking about and watched as he removed the cover, changed the light bulb, and put the cover back on.

"Thanks for doing this, Glen," I said, crossing my arms over my chest. "I swear I'm not as helpless as I come off."

"You're not helpless," he said gently as he climbed down the ladder.

"I come to you all the time for stupid little things," I shrugged. "I bet it's annoying."

"It's not," he said gently. "I really don't mind coming over to help you."

"If it ever gets annoying, please let me know."

I gasped when he leaned in and kissed my cheek. "I will never have to because it will never get annoying."

* * * * *

Even though Glen tried to reassure me that my always asking him for help wasn't annoying, I was still insecure about it. So, I refused to ask him for help. It lasted a week before I eventually did need his help.

I searched through my bag, saying several swear words under my breath as I tried to remember where I put my keys.

"Everything okay, Y/N?" I jumped, instantly making Glen feel bad. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to scare you."

"It's not you," I sighed. "It's just. . . It's been a day and I'm pretty sure I either left my keys in my desk at work or on the table right on the other side of this door."

"Well," he smiled, "good news is that you gave me your spare key last year. Give me one second to pop into my place and I'll grab it."

As we ran into his apartment, I wrapped my arms around myself. He quickly came back and smiled at me before unlocking my door.

"Your home, madam," he said, jokingly opening the door for me.

"Thank you," I sighed. "Seriously, Glen. Thank you."

I walked into my apartment and instantly found my keys right on the small table I have by the door.

"And here they are. Right by the door," I sighed as I grabbed them. I turned back toward Glen, my face burning. "I'm really sorry, Glen. I don't know why I'm so helpless."

"It's okay," he smiled. I swear, this guy is always smiling. "I already told you; I don't mind."

"But I do," I mumbled. I looked up to see him studying me. I cleared my throat before saying, "Thanks again, Glen. I won't keep you from your Friday night plans."

I sent him a smile before closing the door. Right as I closed the door, I heard him mumble, "I didn't have any plans."

* * * * *

A few hours later, I started making cookies for my book club tomorrow night but I didn't check if I had all my ingredients. When I grabbed the salt, I instantly groaned. My first thought should've been to run to the small grocery store around the corner but it wasn't. My first thought was to ask Glen.

I couldn't help but fix my shirt before leaving my apartment and heading to Glen's. I held my breath as I waited for him to open the door.

"Hey, Y/N," he smiled instantly.

"Sorry to bother you. . . Again, but I was wondering if. . ."

"Bother me."

"What?"

"Bother me," he repeated. "I love it when you bother me. It never bothers me."

I smiled when he cringed at how cheezy that sounded. But I loved it.

"I just mean," he tried to save himself, "that I like that you need me. It's been a while since someone has needed me."

"It's been a while since I've trusted someone enough to need them," I said, my voice soft. Glen smiled as he grabbed my hand and pulled me into his chest.

"Do you trust me?" He asked, his voice dropping to a whisper.

"I do," I whispered back. He leaned in and pressed his lips gently to mine. As I kissed him back, I wrapped my arms around his neck. He instantly wrapped his arms around my waist.

"You needed something," Glen said, breaking the kiss.

"Oh," I said, my voice still soft. "Right. Um, I was going to see if you had any salt."

"I do," he chuckled. "What are you making?"

"Cookies for my book club," I explained, my face turning slightly pink.

"That's fun," he said, reaching up and moving some hair out of my face. "You need an extra pair of hands?"

"I could use some help," I shrugged. I grabbed his hand and started pulling him to my apartment. He pulled back, turning me around. I started to ask what was wrong but his smile reassured me.

"We forgot the salt," he chuckled. He gave me a quick kiss before jogging back into his apartment.

I took a shaky breath as I waited. My mind went all over the place as I thought about what this could mean for us. We officially weren't just neighbors anymore. . . Right?

"You okay?"

I hadn't noticed him come back. "Yeah," I said, clearing my throat. "Just. . . overthinking."

"Overthinking?" He asked, his smile dropping. "About what, gorgeous?"

"Us?"

As soon as that word left my lips, I was worried about his reaction. Instead of getting angry or hurt, Glen took a step closer to me. He leaned in and gave me a slow and soft kiss. We broke the kiss, both of us out of breath. He leaned his forehead against mine as I anxiously waited for him to say something.

"There is nothing to overthink about us, Y/N," he whispered. "I have been obsessed with you since we first met. I want to give this a try."

"Really?" I asked as I leaned back.

"Really," he smiled. He chuckled before adding, "I should be honest with you. I only did my laundry on Thursdays that first night we met. I went back the next week, hoping to run into you again. When you told me you do laundry every Thursday night, I started doing mine every Thursday. And not that I've said that out loud, I realize how creepy and stalkerish that is."

"No, it's not," I smiled. "It's extremely sweet."

I wrapped my arms around his neck, stood on my toes, and kissed him. He smiled against my lips as he held me close to him. We broke apart with small giggles when we heard the oven in my apartment beep.

"Sorry to bother you," I said softly, "but any chance you can help me make cookies for my book club?"

[tumbleweedsthesecond]

CLONE HIGH CLOTHING SWAP!!(I'm gonna lore drop abt them but more importantly Anna )

Yayy lore time. So Anna is the clone of Anastasia Romanovna but she says she's the clone of Anastasia Romanov. This is because the other Anastasia Romanov is more well known and I like to include historical references in stuff. From what I know her body was never officially found, she was considered a mystery she was important because of that. Many people think she lived and escaped instead of being killed. Some people also pretended to be her or tried to for money from the aunt as is shown in the Disney movie. specifically Anna Anderson I think which is why I nicknamed her Anna. (If anyone needs to correct me on some of this stuff Ik its been a while since I've done research on the topic I've been researching other stuff.)

When Anna was cloned her foster father believed she was that Anastasia, so up until she was like 11 or so she believed she was Anastasia Romanov, she felt important. She watched the movie and loved the idea of being a princess, of being the one everyone was waiting for. Until one day scudworth told her she was wrong and got the names mixed up. So Anna saw Ivan and cried her eyes out. She didn't want to be the clone of some guys wife. She wants to be more important than that and not live in his shadow. She thinks she's important and seeing her dad disappointed about that really hurt her. So she decided that she was going to just cope. She'd forget everything scudworth said and live that lie. And it felt great for her, she brags about it alot. Though she's gone so far into coping she does almost believe it. because of that she's obsessed with popularity and living up to the real Anastasia Romanov. She wants to be famous, she studies hard and everything. She's even a cheerleader. Because of the coping thing it does make her view other people just as extensions of their clone parents. She thinks everyone thinks the way she does cause she's preppy. Also on why she expects people to be extensions of the clone parents is also due to some self loathing because of who she really is. That doesn't make her any less annoying though but I forgive her❤

Orginally Anna and Ivan were a ship because she couldn't fight her genes or whatever that's been erased actually I decided it'd be more interesting of she was a lesbian. ivan and her are still rivals. She doesn't know she's a lesbian yet tho cause comphet she's also Topher stepsister!! Basically they hate hate each other at first for obvious reasons and Topher even blackmails Anna. Then he does reveal who he's a clone of and she full on ignores him and calls him disgusting for like a week. But eventually they talk and they become a little closer? Anna starts understanding people aren't just their clone parents and she still like trying I guess? Topher also learns to not blackmail her so yay They have some solidarity, a little. They still don't like each other but its more in a sibling way.

Okay now Fyodor. Gonna guess no-one(but like one person) knows who Fyodor Basmanov is. I learned about him through some movies, basically Ivan the terrible had this alleged male lover. He was in the Oprichnina, like a secret police Ivan had made, and he rose in ranks fast. He was known as the favorite of the Tsar many people thought they were a thing(probably). There was rumors he'd wear skirts and dance for Ivan and stuff. Whether or not that's true in the Ivan the terrible movies he's in they actually do address it. In the 1940s two part one he sings this song abt killing people in a dress and a mask that is supposed to resemble Anastasia Romanovna in the beginning of the film. Which is actually why I made them do a clothing swap in the post. In the 1991 version he is sooo pretty and I can't understand everything in the film because no subtitles but I was able to get some context to what was happening. The story from what I know goes Fyodors the favorite and he uses that alot over other people, he sits next to the Tsar during meals and stuff, poisons people for him etc, then he tries to trick this other guy to get rid of him with witchcraft but word got back to Ivan and now they think Fyodor committed treason. So hes like no not me!!come on Ivan listen to me I'll tell everyone about us or something like that I don't know I could only understand some and he's dragged away. Real Fyodor apparently did get accused of treason by Ivan and he was ordered to kill his father. Some say then Fyodor was executed others say he was just sent away I don't know what really happened. Shrugs. Anyway

I made a clone of him just because I can ❤yay❤ he's Ivans ex friend they don't hang out anymore because Ivan thinks he's better than him. Fyodors just a chronically online guy that uses discord too much(gamer). He wears skirts too not for Ivan just cause I like gnc characters. Yay❤. Also Ivan and him weren't a thing though Fyodor probably does have a crush on him for a bit, the most Ivan does for him is buy him discord nitro. Which he doesnt do anymore. Fyodor does still sometimes try be friends with the bleacher creatures mainly cause sometimes he feels like he's nothing without Ivan so. Yeah. He's unsuccessful tho he's annoying af. He's cringe. He thinks it's funny tho

Anyway just realized I made three clones of Ivan the terrible lovers and I don't ship any of them with him(Maria's the third ill post about her another day. Her and Anna get together tho) this guy had like eight wives. I should really just clone all of them and make them a polycule(minus Ivan ofc) this is why I shouldn't study historical figures

[the-offside-rule]

Lance Stroll (Aston Martin) - Happy Hanukkah

Day 24 of Christmas

Prompt: The Differences in Christmas

25 Days Of Christmas

Y/n was filled with excitement as she stepped off the plane, a flurry of anticipation swirling around her. Christmas was just around the corner, and she was invited to spend the holidays with her boyfriend, Lance, at his family home. As she arrived, she took in the lavish surroundings, the elegant decorations, and the warm, inviting atmosphere that enveloped her. As she settled in, she stumbled into the living room, looking confused at how bare it looked and wondering why there was no tree.

"Lance?" She called out, looking around. Lance peeped in. "Where’s your Christmas tree?" Lance chuckled softly, a hint of surprise flickering in his eyes. "Y/n, I’m Jewish, remember?" He replied gently, his smile reassuring. "We don’t have a Christmas tree." Her face flushed in realization. "Oh! Right! I completely forgot." She admitted, laughing at her own oversight. "So what do you do instead?"

Lance was more than happy to explain. "Well, we celebrate Hanukkah instead." He said simply. "It’s a festival of lights. We light the menorah, play dreidel, and eat traditional foods. It’s a little different from Christmas, but it’s just as special in its own way." Y/n listened intently, fascinated by the rich traditions he described. "What kind of foods?" She asked, her curiosity piqued. "Latkes, which are potato pancakes, and sufganiyot, which are jelly-filled donuts." He explained, his eyes lighting up at the mention of the treats. "We’ll make some together!" The thought of spending time with Lance in the kitchen made her heart flutter. "I can’t wait to try them!" She said enthusiastically.

The next morning, Y/n and Lance were in the kitchen, the warm scent of donuts lingering in the air. "I just need to grab something from upstairs." She said, wiping her hands on a towel. As she made her way through the expansive house, she stumbled upon a door that was slightly ajar. Curiosity getting the better of her, she peeked inside. It was Lawrence’s office, filled with books and family photos. One picture caught her eye: a younger Lance beaming as he helped his father prepare food for the final day of Hanukkah.

"Oh! I’m so sorry!" Y/n exclaimed, stepping back. "I didn’t mean to intrude. I was just exploring and got lost." Lawrence looked up, a friendly smile on his face. "No problem at all, Y/n. You can join me if you'd like." He invited, motioning for her to sit down. "I was just reminiscing about those days. Lance loved helping out in the kitchen." Y/n felt at ease as she sat down, her initial embarrassment fading away. "He told me you celebrate Hanukkah. I’d love to hear more about it, I just don't wanna annoy him with all the questions I'm asking about it."

Lawrence was more than willing to share. He talked about the significance of the menorah, the stories behind each night of Hanukkah, and how the family would gather to celebrate together. The conversation flowed easily, and Y/n felt grateful for the insight.

Just then, Lance walked by, overhearing snippets of their conversation. He paused, feeling a swell of pride as he watched his dad share their family traditions with her. “Dad, what are you telling her?” He called out, playfully suspicious. "Just some stories about your childhood." Lawrence replied with a grin. "Did know your girlfriend is curious about our traditions?" Lance smiled, his heart swelling. "I’ll take her to the airport to pick up Chloe and Scotty. She can learn more about Hanukkah from them!"

On the car ride to the airport, Y/n leaned back in her seat, looking out the window as the scenery rushed by. Lance glanced over at her, a content smile on his face. "Are you finding everything okay?" He asked, genuine concern lacing his voice. "Oh, I’m loving it!" She exclaimed, her eyes sparkling. "Your dad told me so much about Hanukkah. It’s all so interesting!" Lance’s heart skipped a beat. He thought to himself, I’ve definitely found the one. They arrived at the airport and helped bring the bags back to the car. Y/n chatted animatedly with Chloe and Scotty as they walked ahead, while Lance lagged behind, soaking in the happiness of the moment.

As they loaded the car, Chloe turned to Lance with a knowing smile. "This is the happiest I’ve seen you in a while." She remarked. "It’s because I’ve realized I’ve found the one." Lance replied, a serious note in his voice. Chloe rolled her eyes playfully. "You’ve said that about the last two girlfriends, and we all know how that ended."

"Yeah, but this time it’s different, and I know I've said thay before too, but I mean it this tims." He insisted, his gaze locked on Y/n, who was laughing with Scotty.

Once they were back in the car, they turned on the radio, and Christmas songs filled the air. Y/n joined in, singing off-key but with pure joy, and Lance couldn’t help but smile at the sight. Chloe watched them, feeling a warmth in her heart, like when she and Scotty started dating and still to this day felt. She finally understood what Lance had been saying; he had found someone special.

*please lmk if there are any mistakes! This is just the understanding I have from my Jewish friend about Hanukkah*

[blkkasa]

Basketball Player! Connie x Instagram Model! Black Oc

Summary: you being his number one biggest fan (🤭)

Contexts/Warnings: a short-long fic, modern, short smut, fluff, famous instagram model black oc (Aya), a well-known basketball player connie springer, etc.

Notes: i made this because i missed writing fics and stuff but keep in mind... this is my first time writing a fic on this app so don't expect it to be perfect in any way. (Im thinking about making a part two but idk. what yall think?)

Word Count: 1232

"GO CONNIE! YOU CAN DO THIS"

He heard his girlfriend's voice and smiled while playing basketball. Everything about her motivates him to do anything, and all thanks to Sasha for introducing them to each other.

Aya and Sasha are sitting at the bleachers watching Connie from a distance but Sasha is having a problem getting no responses or answers from her other best friend.

"Aya, have you heard from Mikasa lately? Like... she isn't answering my calls or texts and here I am asking you where she's at" Sasha gets annoyed at her phone and looks at Aya like she's finna throw a fit at her.

"No girl. I haven't but if you do please remind me because... I need her to help me out picking outfits to wear for my next photoshoot next week."

"Oh don't worry bestie, I'll let you know but thanks for trying though. Ugh! Mikasa needs to answer her phone these days" Sasha whines.

Aya giggles at her friend's complaints about her best friend. She receives a message from her mom telling her to call her little sister at 5:00. "Okay mama..." She rolls her eyes while liking her mom's message and putting her phone back in her purse.

(2 hours later) The game ends and Connie's team wins.

Aya runs up to her boyfriend and gives him the biggest hug yet.

"Baby I'm so proud of you" She kisses him as she says this.

"Thank you mamas. I love you princess." He smiled at her and they both walked to the door by the lockers where the boys can grab their things out of their lockers.

"I'll wait out here while you grab your things."

"Okay beautiful" He winks at her.

Aya was worried about everything, her mom, her friends, and especially her boyfriend. She thought about what would happen tomorrow since it was going to be a long day. She scrolls on her phone looking at her friends' and celebrities' posts, liking them as if she hasn't been active on there since three weeks ago after her last photoshoot. Connie comes back with his things and sneaks behind her to give her a hug and give her neck kisses.

"Hey love, I'm back and I also have a surprise for you at my house" He smirked, loving everything about her.

" Oh? A surprise? For me?" She giggles

"Yes for you mamas" He chuckled and grabbed her by her hand and they walked towards Sasha.

"You're so sweet, you know?" Aya looked at him with glee and kissed him on his cheek.

"Yes princess" He kissed her hand and smiled.

"OH SHIT HEY GUYS" Sasha looked at them and hugged them

"Yo sasha wassup" Connie hugged her back and they did their little signature handshake.

"Hey sash" Aya winked at her

"Oh my gosh. You guys are would never believe what just happened to me"

"What happened?" The couple looked at her confused and interested at what Sasha was going to say.

"So... this beautiful man came up to me and asked me out on a date and bro. When I tell yall, i was screaming. I WAS SCREAMING but not to loud" Sasha was smiling so hard and cheesy about this dream boy.

"Okayyy boo" Aya cheered for her

"Oh shit sasha has finally found her a guy" Connie laughs

"Okay... not too much" Sasha rolled her eyes and smacked him by his arm

"No but in all seriousness he better treat you right or ill beat the shit outta his ass. Like i don't fucking play that shit" Connie huffed.

"Connie, chill... it's fine" Sasha chuckled

Jean and Eren came by them after communicating with the team.

"Wassup guys" The boys came towards them

"Oh shit is that Aya??" Eren looked at her and hugged her

"Heyyyy renn" She hugged him while jokingly slapped the back of his head and ran behind connie from him.

"OW???" He looked so shocked to the point that he didn't even process what just happened to him.

"my bad" Aya laughed

The group walked to the parking lot and said goodbyes to each other.

"Hey babe?"

"Yes mamas?" He turned to look at her while walking to his car.

"So... this morning after you left, my mama called me about something and i wanted to ask you... are you available next week? Because I asked my boss if you would like to participate in my photo shoots?"

"Really??? Yes, pretty girl, anything for you" He kissed her and opened the door for her.

"Yayyy omg" She hugged and got inside his car.

Connie got inside the driver's seat, buckled up, and drove home. He grabs her thighs and squeezed them while focusing on the road. Aya groaned a bit and moved his hand between her legs, letting him do the work. He gets to the red light and looks at her while putting his hand inside her pants. She groaned a bit louder after he rubbed her cunt, looking at her and smirked.

"You like this huh mamas?" He winked at her and rubbed her cunt a little faster.

"Ngh... yes" She moaned.

The light turned green and before he drove home, he drove into an empty parking lot where nobody could see them.

He unbuckled his seatbelt, removing his hand from her beautiful cunt while letting her remove her seatbelt, and got on top of his lap.

They made out for 10 minutes and removed all their clothes off. They switched places and he began to devour her.

"f-fuck! connie.... a-ah!" She gripped his neck for support while her legs were around his shoulders.

"You taste so good mama... shit! i could do this all day with you princess" He kisses and licks her up until she cums. He devoured her for 5 minutes. He kissed her thighs and bit them giving her bite marks.

"c-connie.... oh! you f-feel... s-so good... ngh!" She looks at him with teary eyes while he fingers her.

"ngh... mamas... you look so damn gorgeous crying for me, fuck...!" He fingers her faster until she cums on his face.

"FUCK" She cummed all over him.

They sat back to their seats and heavily breathed for 5 minutes trying to get their breaths back.

"Hey pretty girl, when we get home ill run us some bath water and order pizza. okay?"

"Okay babe." She blew him a kiss.

Connie looked at his phone checking any messages his friends or family sent him. He received 100 messages from the gc, 20 messages from his mom, and 5 messages from Jean.

"Shit. That's alot of fucking messages" He sighed.

Aya giggled at him and put her clothes back on while he did the same. They drove home without saying a word to each other.

(20 minutes later)

"Hey princess, I got your surprise in the room. go look" He carried her inside the house and put her down on the floor to take their jackets and shoes off.

Aya walked to their room and saw flowers, chocolate, candles, two presents, and an envelope on their king sized bed.

"OMG!! FOR ME?? THANK YOU SO MUCH BABY" She hugged so hard and gave him face kisses.

"Yes babe everything is yours, who else would i give it too" He laughed and kissed her face.

"It doesn't matter. all i know is that this stuff is mines" She smiled and closed the door.

@blkkasa

Notes: so if yall want visuals of Aya, Connie, and their fits in this whole fic then let me know cause I got yall. Also, let me know who i should write about next when i upload a poll, okay? thank you babes 💗.

[dirthamen-enjoyer]

please remember that this is all my personal thoughts and i might be wrong about some of the things. it is critical. this started off as one specific topic about solas and then ended up turning into more of a ramble. i guess? anyways spoilers for veilguard under the keep reading line.

i wish my brain worked properly sometimes because i really want to know why i feel like they didn't write solas cohesively enough. to me, he is the best part of datv. and no, it's not because i romanced him in inquisition. actually, i could never finish his romance because he was such a know-it-all and it would annoy me lol. (it's because i'm a know-it-all and know-it-alls tend to clash. i plan on forcing myself through it one day though.) despite him annoying me, i liked him as a character. i liked his reveal, the moral greyness of him.

i think mainly my problem is how they presented his morals and why he wants to tear down the veil. it feels like they couldn't decide how to focus him. so originally he's tearing down the veil because it was a mistake and wants the world to go back to the way it was so the days of the ancient elves - specifically after the evanuris are gone - could return, at least that's what i got from it.

then at the beginning of veilguard, it suddenly it feels like tearing the veil down is just a byproduct of him needing to move the last of the evanuris to a better prison. huh? in my head i always thought that solas was ready to fight the evanuris when the veil is brought down because he's willing to take the risk of dealing with them just to bring the old world back. maybe that's too headcanon-y? also i never got around to reading the books or comics fully so i might have missed some details.

then at the end it's "i must do this for mythal or her sacrifice would be for nothing" or whatever he said. huh? i don't get why it's suddenly about mythal, even with the regret murals showing how close they were. it should be about him and all he sacrificed, only for it to not go the way he wanted. without even talking about what was revealed in the regrets murals, he sacrificed the world he knew to lock the evanuris (and forgotten ones) away to try and make life better for the common elves, the slaves.

i don't know how well that last paragraph comes off. i'm just saying that it felt like it didn't belong. his whole story is about regrets, yes. makes sense. he regrets the events that happened because of the veil mistakenly happening. he regrets what's in the murals (which i might talk about in another post because :/) but the game acts like him tearing down the veil is just selfish. there's no other nuance there, it's just selfish. huh? there is so much nuance to this position, in my opinion, that i can't even figure out how to write it.

okay so i've officially lost my train of thought about this original topic, which means i don't know what else to put. i'll just say that i feel dumb that i don't understand it while it feels like everyone else does. also i don't understand why i dislike how everything ended for him. it was like someone punched me when lost elf started playing because this ending didn't feel right. and i don't know why. (that one ending... "i am a god!" bffr he would NAWT FUCKING say that.)

also let me just quickly state that i do not think they should have made the evanuris, and elves, originally spirits. it takes away the fantasy in a the fantasy story, is the best way to say it. i know it sounds weird, but... mysteries are good. not everything needs an explanation. we could have had the mystery of "what were the evanuris?" if they kept them as just gods instead of explaining them. just have the reveal be that the gods weren't good to their subjects and are all-powerful. no need to explain all the time.

this has nothing to do with how much i wanted to fight actual gods (i did. i wanted to go up against actual gods other than the archdemons. and we know that reveal :/ ) or even how much more impactful it would have made solas's history.

[nalyra-dreaming]

Hi, I have some loose thoughts, and I would like your opinion, I know that in the books everything is about Lestat (and that the series will be more about him and Louis) but I really hope that doesn't happen in the series because I always ending up hating the characters where everything is about and for them, and i want to keep liking Lestat! it's simply annoying, I would like the series to explore the history of the four characters, I think it would be much more interesting, I also think that people aren't really analyzing Armand and his relationship with Louis properly, people tend to think that Armand controls Louis 100% of the time and the writers and Jacob himself have said that they wanted Louis to have some agency, for example, when Armand suggested new art for the wall, he suggested colorful art and people insist on saying that Armand keeps him in an prison, controlling everything in the apartment, leaving everything dark, I don't know, when at least for me Louis is doing this, because he is unhappy and in a way, he wants Armand to be unhappy too, they are both not with who they want to be, and I think Louis must have really asked Armand to make him forget the first interview because he was no longer able to deal with the guilt about Claudia and Lestat and he didn't really want to try to commit suicide again, but Armand, in order to keep the lies going, had to keep controlling his mind, so he kept increasing the control until he reached a point where he didn't even wanted (obviously i dont know, just especulating) but he didn't know what to do, because I think Armand loved Louis in some way. I also don't see people talking about the fact that Armand thinks that Marius, who is older and more powerful than him, died at the hands of other vampires (who I think were younger than him, I don't remember) so why not they believe that Armand really thought that the coven could kill him, if they were focused, we know that he could have prevented it but I don't think he knew that...anyway, I think we have to listen to what Armand has to say, because until now we only know about lies and omissions that he told, we don't know what was really happening or what was going on in his head until this moment. Sorry, because it's a lot and english is not my first language!

Hey!

Not everything is about Lestat :), but he is the narrator of a lot of them, and is part of the story in most :) Given the books Rolin said he takes from (already) makes it clear that he focuses on the Loustat/Lestat centric books, which carries obviously repercussions for the show. But that just as a note :)

I do think, and I just said this in another ask again, too, that the show is built on the big four, namely Louis, Lestat, Armand and Daniel. These are the corner stones they chose, and the rest of the relationships and stories will revolve around them I think. But... Lestat will stay, and, well... he will be very prominent in the upcoming seasons, let's put it that way.

I... have an idea for when Louis could have asked for his memories to be erased, but I don't think he would have asked Armand. I mean, this is the guy who keeps the stones in his ankles as a reminder. I don't think he would willingly choose to lose the memories, no way. There might be ways to make that statement true, story-wise, but if it is, there is a LOT more to it.

Armand had to constantly readjust Louis, that is no speculation, that is something Assad has said :), and that is clearly visible in s2, too, especially on rewatch. Louis' behavior shifts, radically, from part to part, depending on what is... needed.

As per Armand and the "coven killing/controlling him"... nonny, that part has been proven a lie. It has been proven by the few pages we got of the trial script as well. Armand was never in any danger from them. He directed the trial. He was their master for centuries.

He killed Claudia and tried to kill Louis.

That said, you are correct, the "current" knowledge of the characters has to be taken into account. And Armand might not know yet that Marius is still alive (though I do think that him hanging art of Marius in the penthouse speaks volumes). I say might, because it depends. In the books he sees someone he thought dead at some point, and ... that must have led to a lot of speculation.

And yes, I would love to "listen" to Armand, as you put it. I would LOVE an adaptation of TVA or maybe a spin-off of him and Daniel in Night Island. I'd love that.

But Armand has been giving a very edited tale, that has already been stated, and he has changed the tale in Louis' head, has implanted and changed memories. Daniel latching onto the fact that Lestat could not have spoken in Louis' mind after turning was supposed to be the clue there.

Next season, Lestat will give his account - and whether this fandom likes it or not, but Lestat is canonically doing so for Louis, to make him understand, and he has no reason to lie and he does not soften much either. And that understanding of Louis being the driving motivation will have the "documentary" result in something quite different than what s1 & 2 were - and Louis will understand.

In the books, that is when they reunite - before other things happen. I... no matter the other stuff they put into s3, but I don't think that will be any different here, since they keep quite close to the books for the big emotional points.

[paladin--strait]

soulmates part 5

luke hughes x reader

sorry this is so short! i'm hoping it'll kinda be like a filler chapter that'll kinda set things up more. sorry that its moving kinda fast, i'm hoping to keep this series under ten chapters.

tw!!: some language, use of y/n, reader can be depicted as any body shape/size. this story moves kinda fast, since I want it to only be a couple of parts long. this is a complete work of fiction. I am no way saying or implying that these people act the way they do in the story. I am open to any sort of constructive criticism! thank you!

-

"quinn." i say, shutting the door to his room behind me. "we need to talk."

he sits in silence on the side of his bed, staring blankly at the wall. "what." his words have no emotion behind them.

"what the hell is going on?" i cross my arms as i move to stand in the line of his vision.

"nothings going on." he says, his tired eyes flickering to look up at me.

"bullshit, quinn." i step towards him, "i need to know."

"i told you, it's nothing." he shrugs, looking at me with an annoyed expression on his face.

"but it's something."

"it's not your business." he fires back, his tone a little more harsh than i hope he intended it to be.

"but it is quinn," i plead, sitting beside him and putting a hand on his shoulder. "it involves me somehow and i need to know what it is."

he doesn't respond, his shoulders dropping as he sighs.

"i don't want to spend the last two weeks at the lake house with some of y'all being so depressed. there's tension, quinn. and it's killing me already, killing the others. they won't tell me what's going on, so i need you to."

"fine." he says, looking over at me. "i..." i wait for his response, hoping it's nothing bad.

"i made a huge mistake." he sighs and i look at him with a confused look on my face. "i shouldn't have tried to set you and luke up together."

my brows furrow, "why not? i thought you said we would be perfect for each other."

"because..." he looks down at his sock covered feet, "i didn't realize...how much i like you..."

my eyes widen slightly at his sudden confession, "what...?"

"i like you, y/n." he looks back up at me, this time with a look of pure adoration in his tired eyes. "me and luke...we got into it after you left for vancouver. brock said something about the way we act towards each other and it made me realize how much i truly like you..."

my shoulders slump a little, "quinn...i don't know what to say."

"you don't have to say anything. i know you don't like me that way and i'd prefer we stay friends. if you still want to be, that is." he says, his lips pursing into a line after he finishes speaking.

"i'd love to still be friends with you, quinn. you're everything to me. but, i don't like you like that and i don't want our opposing feelings for each other to take a toll on our friendship." i explain, hoping he'll understand.

"i agree completely." he nods, "but luke is upset with me and i don't want me and him to be upset with each other and there be even more tension if the two of you end up together."

"i'll talk to luke, try and work things out." i stand, putting my hands in the pocket of my canucks hoodie. "i think i like him, quinn. he's different than what i thought he'd be. he called me a few times while i was gone to check up on me, he's really sweet."

quinn smiles softly, "i'm glad he's been so good to you. i'm sorry about all this."

"don't be sorry, quinny. everything will be okay. and i'm sure it's just a little crush, you'll probably get over it soon." i smile at him, holding my arms wide open for a hug and he stands immediately, placing his arms around my waist and pulling me in for a hug. it's gentle but loving, his chin placed on my shoulder.

i let go, walking over to his door and opening it to leave, "you'll get over it soon, i promise." i whisper, smiling at him softly.

but i don't hear the words that leave his mouth after i shut the door behind me. "probably..." his words laced with sadness and defeat as the bed dips under him as he sits back down.

-

i walk down the hallway and to luke's room, knocking on the door.

a few seconds later, a tired looking luke opens the door. his eyes are red and puffy, like he's been crying. "hey luke...can we talk?" i ask. he nods, opening the door further to let me in. i walk in and he shuts the door behind me, looking over at me. "i just talked to quinn and-"

"shut up." he cuts me off, his hands placed on my hips as he pulls me closer.

"luke...what are you doing?" i ask, my eyes widening with confusion and almost a hint of excitement.

"what i've been wanting to do for a while." luke's words are quiet and sweet, with a sense of urgency and nervousness hinted in there too. "what i need to do before he takes you away from me."

[moongeonight]

Play time

Summary: There is no plot, just fluff between kid Viktor and Rio.

A/N: I promised @home-of-the-squirmle That I would do this and honestly it's such a cute concept! I need more of these two 🥹

-------------------

Viktor had finished collecting enough food to feed Rio, that's what the doctor called her, Only a few days had passed since he agreed to be his "assistant" but for the moment he only had to feed the pink creature.

He entered the cave where she was supposed to be, but surprisingly it was... alone, probably the doctor went to look for supplements but it was strange that she wasn't there... he decided checking the improvised laboratory that was in that same cave, he opened the door but he didn't find anyone...

"hello..? Doctor Singed? Rio...?" He called out in case the doctor was there, Only to be met with silence in the room, not a sound.

Viktor came out of the small laboratory, still confused and with the food box in one hand wondering if maybe she escaped, until...

He was suddenly knocked to the ground with a small cry of pain falling on his stomach with his cane falling to one side of him , the food in the box just scattering everywhere, now with the giant pink waverider on top of him that had come out of the water... that's why he couldn't find her...!

"Ah...! R-Rio?! What were you doing in the water? G-Get Off me!" He exclaimed as he struggled to make her get off of him, it was clear that he wasn't strong enough to do anything against her, he tried to push her as hard as he could but it didn't work...

Meanwhile she was grabbing with her tongue the food that was scattered on the floor near Viktor as he didn't know whether to try to reach his cane with the few strength he could use to try to get up or wait for her to come out on top of him, to his misfortune, Rio began to eat the food that had fallen from the box.

"hey!, Rio no! Don't eat them all!, they're for later-" He exclaimed as he saw how she literally ate everything on the ground in a few seconds.

Viktor let out a little frustrated sigh when he saw that she finished eating everything burying his head into the ground.

"Ugh... the doctor will be mad at me..."

Once Rio finished eating the food on the floor, her gaze once again focused on the pale kid below her who she had knocked down a few moments ago, she let out a small sound while looking at him curiously as she rest on top of him.

Viktor couldn't move now that her large body was on top of him and she was preventing him from leaving... All he could do was let out another annoying sound on the floor.

"You're very heavy Rio- And it's hard to breathe under you..."

He said as he tried his best to look at her with a mixture of annoyance and tiredness from being unable to breathe and move properly, while she ignored him and instead took the tip of her head to rub on his hair.

Viktor let out a small sound of discomfort, it's not that he didn't like the gesture but her saliva was making his hair dirty and even more messy.

"W-Wait Don't rub me so hard, you're making my hair messy!" He tried to push her away but due to her size he couldn't push her away much.

Rio continued to rub against the young boy, completely disregarding what he was saying, her tongue came out of her mouth again and began to run all over his face.

"W-Wha-?! No! stop! Ah- N-Not my face! Come on it's gross!"

He quickly tried to cover his face with his hands when he felt her big tongue run across his face, It didn't help much that she had... 3 tongues?? how did that even work...?

Viktor's face was now a mess thanks to Rio's affectionate tongue, when she finished covering his face in her saliva, she decided to continue her "affectionate attack" now with the rest of his body, She placed her head on his stomach and began to gently rub it against him.

"E-Eh?! N-Not my stomach-!"

He let out a small giggle when she rubbed against his stomach, it was... a little ticklish, more when her tongue ran all over that sensitive area causing an involuntary laugh from the boy.

"O-Okay ohohokay! D-Don't rub my stomach anymohohore please! I-I'm seriously ahahasking you- P-Please!"

Rio seemed to ignore him or just didn't want to stop her tickle attack on the boy, her tongue also slipped under his t-shirt and began to roam all over his stomach again.

"NO-! Nonohoho! Rio- S-Stop! I-It tihihihickles! Hahaha!" He continued to laugh because her tongue was tickling him so much.

The pink creature changed the area of her attack as she stopped rubbing against his abdomen and now she was rubbing it against his sides, she really seemed to like that area too.

"N-No not the sides! P-Please nohohot the sides! N-Not there...! Hahaha! T-This is too much...!"

Thanks to the sensitivity of his sides, he couldn't help but laugh out loud from the tickles, but that seemed to only encourage Rio to continue tormenting his flanks. She continued to rub against the sides of the young boy with her snout while he laughed and yelled for her to stop.

Viktor really couldn't take it anymore, tears from so much laughing and begging for her to stop were beginning to come out on his face.

"Please! I-I really can't stand it! Ah! Hehe- hahaha! I-It's Too- Much! shoo! shoo!"

Finally it seemed that Rio was tired of tormenting the boy's sides, she finally stopped rubbing against his sensitive spots which caused him to let out a big sigh of relief, but his respite was short-lived... She had another zone to attack.

"Good thing you stopped..."

He said, trying to slow his breathing a bit due to the tickling, but he soon noticed where her head was heading... Right towards his leg... right towards where he has a limp leg... uh oh.

"W-Wait! R-Rio please no! N-Not my leheheg! I-It's very sensitive don't!"

He began to beg, knowing well where this was going to go, Rio ignored his pleas and her head went to the boy's disabled leg, she began to rub there, he soon realized that this time she was rubbing it very carefully as to not accidentally hurt him...

And although he was happy that she was rubbing him carefully, there was the small problem... That That part was extremely ticklish...

"AH..! HAHAHA! NO! D-Don't rub there! I-It's very- S-SENSITIVE! it really t-tickles! Hahaha! P-Please stohoHOHOp!"

She continued to run over his leg, but after a few minutes that seemed like an eternity, she finally stopped her "attack" and rest her head on his stomach since she had also become tired.

"Damn... That wasn't necessary Rio! But still... I guess T-Thank you for stopping..."

He said with a tired voice as he tried to catch his breath, his stomach was wet because of her saliva... he definitely needed to change clothes...

[mixterglacia]

CONTENT WARNING: Vivziepop Critical/ Stolitz Critical below the cut.

This episode made me incredibly angry, so it's not going to be as well structured as I try to manage.

TL;DR The pacing and tone was a horrible mess, and this should have been split into at least two episodes to pull this off.

To start, we prove in the first five minutes how little these two actually know each other. They're surprised by very simple things and I don't like that. It tells me that neither of them, but especially Stolas, EVER asked about the other's interests. Cool, that's good to know I was right about that the whole time.

Blitz is WILDLY out of character in the bulk of this episode. I LOATHE how he's waiting on Stolas hand and foot. If we're being honest, he'd probably just say "figure it out yourself" and focus on his life, business, and daughter. Why are we always having to baby Stolas' feelings? It feels like he's the only one allowed to actually be doted on. (In a non-humorous way.)

And now he remembers Via? Sure, just run off without thinking about your family. You have never let that stop you before. And now Stella is being cartoonishly evil in front of her daughter? We've never had it proven that she's a bad mother. In fact, from what Via states later, that's the case! I really think they have no idea on how to be subtle with her.

In a similar vein to the moment with Blitz watching the family later. You didn't need to tell us who he was imagining in that window. The moment worked without you punching it down our throats.

Likewise with Millie's pregnancy. I wish they'd left that as an open thread, rather than taking time to fully confirm it. Like maybe all the way up to the point where she went into the bathroom and left looking a little fucked up? That way it can be an engaging thing to return to in S3.

The non-drama parts of the episode (especially the first five minutes) dragged HARD. They gutted any emotional moments and just felt like padding for the runtime.

I am so annoyed at the way this show is trying to lessen what Stolas did.

HE CHEATED ON HIS WIFE. HE DESTROYED HIS FAMILY. HE ABANDONED HIS DAUGHTER. HE IS A TERRIBLE MAN WHO GETS EVERYTHING HE WANTS BECAUSE THE SHOW BABIES HIM.

This is not some cute little quirk. His wife was never implied to cheat on him first. She was a bitch, but she didn't do anything to deserve this. I can't stress enough that if you showed her playing around too, it would immediately solve most of the hypocrisy with this.

Trying to weasel around that by Blitz trying to say cheating really so bad is fucking gross. It's not like they had an open relationship and Stella got jealous. Stolas is a slimeball. He doesn't deserve Blitz. He doesn't deserve Via.

He hasn't earned any of this.

While it came out of nowhere, the Via song is STELLAR. As a product of divorce, she owes her father nothing. She deserves to feel so hurt and betrayed.

"My tears won't fall upon your shoulder...I'll just get older and you'll only know my name." Hit me like a truck.

So imagine my outrage when we aren't allowed to sit and think about her feelings for more than a few seconds after the song. We aren't allowed to focus on her pain. If they staged a sequence between the number and her finding her dad's pills, I think it would work better.

Or even uploading the song by itself. But no. You have to CONSTANTLY remind us to feel bad for the stupid fucking owl. Feel bad because he's depressed. Feel bad because he's trapped in the same loveless marriage as his wife. But don't feel bad for her because she's a bitch.

Fuck. Off.

My dad was manic depressive, that doesn't mean he got to treat our family the way he did. Stolas didn't even think about her before throwing his life away over his booty call.

This show has so much potential that it just squanders. There are two different series being forced together and it doesn't work. You have the comedy series shoved into the same sweater as the soap opera. They aren't mutually exclusive, but truly the team seems incapable of making this work.

I'm done.

This isn't even fun to critique anymore.

If folks want my opinions on future Helluva Boss content, you'll have to directly ask me to watch the piece in question. I'm still going to give S2 of Hotel a shot, but as far as this?

I'm throwing in the towel. Of the two, I was so excited for Helluva. I loved the characters, I loved the idea, and I truly loved the first couple episodes.

But that show doesn't exist anymore.

Once again, I'm going to take a moment to remind you all:

You are allowed to love this series. I am just a dude on the internet. I am not trying to change your mind. I am not trying to ruin your fun. If you love it, that's awesome. I am so happy you found something that sings to your soul.

Don't let me harsh your buzz. Okay?