#but I figured out the plot twist about 20 pages in

[patolemus]

It’s very humbling when you’re reading a book —part of a trilogy, very acclaimed— and the only thing you can think of is ‘the fanfic I read the other day was better’

[hedwig123]

A Subjective Definitive Ranking of the DQ Dragons

7. Honora. Fuck you you green bitch I'm glad Jasmine yelled at you you selfish hypocritical fucknugget

6. Hopian. Literally 0 lines but that's better than being a BITCH (also gets a pity vote because Lief was just fully going to leave him sleeping forever before he figured out the Hira thing??? I feel like we don't talk about that enough???????)

5. Joyeu. Kind of an icon for revealing the whole "two sides to every story" plot twist about those Capricon dickheads (and like 1 page after you think you're finally done with DQ's plot twists, too). Thought she was a guy until literally yesterday when I randomly saw her called "she" on the wiki though

4. Fidelis. Good dude. Ate some finger-eaters. Hometown advantage of being from Del. Also has an advantage of showing up to be nice and impressive and ominous a whole series early, good for him.

3. Second place is a close race, OK, it's a very close race between the ladies with the similar names, but I am gonna give third place to Fortuna. Forget chaos goblin it's all about the chaos dragon babyyyyy I love her so much she's here for a good time not a long time

2. Forta. SPARKLY BABY DRAGON I DON'T CARE IF SHE'S TOO YOUNG TO HAVE A PERSONALITY HER PERSONALITY IS BABY

The extremely obvious winner:

VERITAS

What can I even say about him?? That he's my favorite character in the whole series besides Lief? That he regularly drops iconic quotes like "only fools refuse to see the faults in those they love" which has been etched in my brain for the last 20 years? That he spends 10 days getting gradually crushed to death and still manages to recover enough to get shit done? That him staying in Diamond territory to raise Forta is the DRAGON EQUIVALENT OF ONE OF THE MOST POPULAR TROPES IN MODERN MEDIA, GRUMPY OLD MAN PSEUDO-ADOPTS PLUCKY GIRL? That he's SPARKLY AND PURPLE????

VERITAS IS PERF PASS IT TF ON

[immortaladrien]

A charismatic knight attempting to get a cold person to spar with them?

haha this is super fluffy and cute! unless… (featuring adrien, wanting to add angsty plot twists to everything)

tws: swords, peer pressure, stabbing, fluff, angst, tragic endings & corruption (the fluff ends at the ☕️!)

“One round!”

The witch peeled their gaze from the inside of a spellbook, grimacing. Knight-boy had dropped a jousting sword by their foot, beaming expectantly.

Damn that dazzling smile.

The witch cleared their throat and looked back down. “I am in the middle of studying.”

“You’re always in the middle of studying!” The grin reached their eyes now, clearly not deterred in the slightest.

“Perhaps that’s a sign to leave me be.”

“Or ‘perhaps’ you’re being stubborn.”

Their counterpart scoffed a little, turning a page. “One of us certainly is.”

With a dramatic groan, the knight crossed their arms. “You’re no fun! Don’t you want to do anything other than read?”

Have you ever even read a book? “Go away.”

“I need someone to practice with!”

“You have other friends. Ask one of them.”

That did… something. An awkward silence immediately washed over the two and the knight fell quiet, fidgeting awkwardly with the plates of their armor.

“You… do have other friends, don’t you?”

“You’re the best opponent out of everyone I’ve fought.”

How bizarrely avoidant. “I hardly know how to wield a sword. You’re lying through your teeth.”

“Maybe so, but you’re cunning! And unpredictable! Hell, last time I saw you fight, you hit a guy with a spell and he went crying for his mother…” They trailed off, as if revisiting a fond memory.

“You were… there? You watched my duel?”

The knight nodded enthusiastically, beaming yet again. “They don’t train us how to deal with magic users in the field, so I go to your matches. I’ve been taking notes! And you’re the only one that I know that actually uses magic, so…”

A slight heat creeped on to the witches’ face, stumbled for words. “That’s– you’re– just study books, or something.”

“I know that’s what you do,” their counterpart pouted, leaning on a sword. “But I’m so much better learning through experience. I didn’t exactly read a book on the best place to stab someone. I just.. tried a couple times until I figured out what made them fall the fastest.”

It was hard not to smile at that. “So I should spar you because… You’ll learn my tricks and stab me?”

“W…What! No!” The knight squawked, eyes wide. “No, you should spar me because it will be fun! And you can… practice spells on me, or something?”

“I’m teasing.”

“Oh.” Their cheeks flushed a light pink.

The witch signed fondly. Damn them being this cute, too. “You’re not going to leave me alone until we spar, are you?”

Sensing where this was going, the knight lit up. “Correct.”

“And you’ll let me go back to studying afterwards?”

“Right again!”

“I guess that leaves me with one option,” The witch stood from their seat with a halfhearted stretch. “Do not actually stab me.”

“I wouldn’t dream of it.” Their friend took their wrist and tugged them towards the training fields, grinning wildly.

- ☕️ -

The witch peered over the battlefield with a disgusted grimace. They’d never seen this much carnage in one battle; frankly, they never processed that it would go this far.

Lives must be lost in the name of revolution. Blood must be spilled.

It was simply the amount of blood…

They sighed, kicking their final fallen foes body to the side. God, do I need a drink. With a yawn, they made their way further into the kingdom.

Knights didn’t really train in the way of magic users, a old friend once told them. The training must not have changed much over the years, because these warriors had been pathetic; the King had said they’d be the best and brightest, and in total the battle had been about 20 minutes.

(As they walked, they noticed the streets to the castle were clear of civilians. Unsurprising, but nonetheless very welcome.)

Of course, the King had always been an incompetent buffoon. The witch had experienced his stupidity first hand after being thrown in the dungeons the day of their graduation. ‘Magic is far too dangerous,’ he’d said. ‘You’ll corrupt all of our holy warriors.’

They all were slain now, so what good had it done him?

Reaching the castle gates came with relative ease. The Witch knocked, for the sake of politeness.

(They hadn’t really expected the doors to open, but they still internally scoffed at how rude the royal was even now.)

The path to the throne room wasn’t long once they blew open the doors with a simple spell of wind. Sure, their approach would be obvious, but where did the old man have to hide?

“O mighty king,” They sung from the final turn. “Judgement day has finally arrived.”

They rounded the bend and in front of them laid the massive corridor with a throne in the back. Sitting on the throne was the old man, as cold and cocky as ever. The witch peered up to him with a grin.

“Any final words, your highness?”

“You said you would kill my entire army before you finally came for my head.”

The witch laughed airily, a spine-chilling sound. “Perhaps you need to look outside, my king. Your men lay in shambles, they died merciful deaths… Yours will not be nearly as kind.”

The king grunted acknowledgment, but a small devilish grin emerged on his lips. “That was not my entire army.”

“Then you forgot to send them all. It is your flaw, not mine.” They prepared a spell, holding an orb of necrotic magic in their hands with ease. “I will kill all those that face me, and everyone who dared has already fallen.”

“There’s one more who dares. It was simply a fight I wanted to overlook.”

The witch scoffed, taking aim regardless. “Who?”

The king motioned behind them.

Wary of a trick, they spun on their heels slowly. Their breath instantly caught in their throat.

Their darling knight, head hung low, stood inches from them.

Years of age weighed on their face, and their stance was far worse for wear than anything the witch had remembered. Eyebags. Ragged breathing. A shell of their former glory at best, but the person they’d once loved all the same.

“What has he done to you?” The witch whispered, voice tender and low.

The hero wrenched their eyes shut, drawing their sword. “One round.”

[kazz-brekker]

finally convinced my sister to start reading gideon the ninth and after about 20 pages she put the book down and stated, with all the confidence of someone who has figured out an important plot twist that will be revealed at a much later date, “i think harrow’s parents are dead and she’s used her necromancy to resurrect them”

[ravendruidreads]

A Vicious Game - Review

Author: Melissa Blair Saga: The Halfling Saga Date Read: February 20, 2024 - February 24, 2024 Format: Physical Pages: 458

Characters: 8/10 Atmosphere: 7/10 Writing: 7/10 Plot: 8/10 Intrigue: 8/10 Logic: 7/10 Enjoyment: 8/10 Rating: 7.5/10 (4 stars) Spice Level: 2/5

The review is hidden below due to spoilers.

What changed from the previous books:

The first thing I can think of to mention is the main plot. I am a sucker for nature-based quests, so as soon as it was clear that Keera was going to have to travel around Elverath to unlock the seals, and that they would unlock possible nature-based powers, I was hooked. I even made a list of locations where I thought the seals would be, based on the map and the hints provided (my theory was that the seals were connected to the different woods, so I looked for water bodies near them. I only got one location right tho).

Despite this, there were some plot parts that I disliked or that confused me. One of them being Killian's presence in Myrelinth because I was 90% sure Damien had ordered him to be locked his in room in Koratha, and even more because no one (particularly Keera) seemed to ask any questions about this. Of course this would be answered toward the end of the book, but I'd still have preferred if there had been some sort of explanation or mention.

Another part I didn't like (as I mentioned in the review of A Shadow Crown) was the possibility of a love triangle with Killian, Keera and Riven (if only I knew...), so when Keera kissed Killian (and he kissed her back) because she was hellbent on pushing Riven away, I was so angry I almost stopped reading the book. Props to the author for writing the chemistry between them so well (again, if only I knew) that it made me question if Keera and Riven were endgame or if Riven was going to die and she would end with Killian.

However I wasn't just upset with the relationship side of this scene, but also with Keera's dumb behavior, which brings us to...

Even though there is a content warning list at the beginning of the book and I clearly read 'relapse', I was not emotionally ready to read about Keera's relapse. The first few chapters were hard to read, but I'm glad Gerarda was there to get Keera's head out of her ass (I cannot believe I'm saying this!).

That was another pleasant twist I wasn't expecting. Gerarda turned out to be a character that I grew to love and admire, and I was especially happy to see her as another symbol of representation.

Let's now address the elephant in the room, the plot twist to rule them all. I felt like I hit a brick wall headfirst. It was one of those plot twists where I had to close the book and take a moment to gather my thoughts before I could proceed, because all I could think about was EVERYTHING that happened in the other two books, and how much foreshadowing I missed (I can't wait to reread the saga with a different set of eyes.

I always had a feeling of suspicion about Killian, but honestly, I thought it was because he was going to turn out being a spy to the crown or something. I am very pleased with the plot twist, although it was a bit hard to read the spicy scene the way it happened.

Two honorable mentions before I move on to the theories:

Keera's depression is so relatable. How many times did I have the same thoughts of "The time of easy days is gone, but perhaps they would be easier without me"? For the same reason, "Your mother felt everything as deeply as she could. it made her a fierce leader and a loyal friend, but it also made her lonely" is also something I relate to a lot.

Keera holding lightning was hot. When I read "You will be able to call storms and lightning at will" I almost died. Give me as strong, powerful woman who can wield lightning and I will fall at her feet.

Theories:

My theory of the lock of the power being connected to the King proved itself wrong, but I don't even care because I preferred the way it happened. I figured early on in the book that Riven's power was connected to the seals and he was going to die when the last seal broke, so I wasn't expecting him to actually survive, nor that he would become a Halfling, which I guess makes sense.

Because of this, I think that the reason why Riven was the way he was (Fae and Mortal) was because of his miskwithir connection to Keera. Like he was born with this power because Keera would need it in the future, and once she "siphoned it" (which is not confirmed but it's my theory), Riven no longer needed to be Fae.

Based off on that, I think Keera's blood is no longer Amber, because she went through a reverse transformation. Which means she's no longer Halfling but full Fae.

Let's talk about Collin (again). I should really trust my instincts. I had a feeling from the first moment that he was the mole, and turns out I was right, just... not in the way I wanted to be. Damien is a psycho and the way he used Collin is disgusting. I love it.

A quote that stayed:

A person only has as much power over our minds as we allow, Keera.

[yurisorcerer]

some thoughts on Hanako & The Terror of Allegory

On a Discord server I'm in, some folks are doing a manga-swap challenge. I have six manga from this challenge to read in 2024, and I've just finished the first one. I don't have enough thoughts to warrant a full review, but I did want to say a few things.

This is Hanako & The Terror of Allegory. Also called Hanako & The Teller of Allegory---the name has an intentional double meaning that doesn't translate super well, I think.

This one is pretty obscure, it was recommended to me by my buddy AftershockWolf (@theokamiproject).

To be honest, I didn't love it. The series is in that "urban legend horror" genre, of a sort that's since been perfected by the likes of Otherside Picnic or, say, something like Mysterious Disappearances (which, that's getting an anime next season, isn't that weird?). The innate disadvantage something like this has is because there's such a small pool of source material, it can very much feel like you've read every take on every idea before, and furthermore, this manga is from 2004 (into 2005. Ran for about a year, from what I can tell), so I've seen a lot of different spins on the stories it mines for most of its chapters---Hanako of the Toilet, Mary the Doll, Kokkuri-san, Red Paper / Blue Paper, the Slit-Mouthed Woman, etc.---and in many cases I've seen them done better. Again, it's kind of unfair to this manga since it was written quite a while ago, so I suppose you'd call this a case of something aging poorly.

It's also bad in a few other more mundane ways; the sense of humor is absolutely daft as fuck, lots of very basic stock jokes with zero originality to them. Most of these were getting old in 2004. Reading them 20 years later makes them kind of insufferable. Occasionally it'll be funny *by accident*, but that's a different thing and doesn't really count IMO.

It's also not actually great at really getting under my skin in the way that the truly great stuff in this genre (again like Otherside Picnic) can, and has a bad habit of pulling plot twists out of its ass when it doesn't really need to. Most of this will not stick with me, and to top it all off the art is very middle of the road and of its time. Although there are occasional cool splash panels that make up for that somewhat.

However, all is not lost. The weakpoints of this manga are mostly not that interesting, what is interesting is where it goes in its final act, where it introduces a (to my knowledge) completely-original antagonist, and the manga starts essentially collapsing in on itself as the characters very directly fight for control of the narrative against said antagonist, a villainous authorial figure who herself might not really exist. It's a rather sudden shift, but it's a welcome one, and I think if more of the manga had been like this I would probably have enjoyed it a lot more.

I have a sneaking suspicion that this series got axed from whatever magazine it was running in, and that's the culprit for the swift change in direction, but in this case it saves a bad manga from itself and makes reading the thing not a complete loss. Also, said character is attractive, I'll say it. (Wolf happened to tell me that this character was the whole reason they recommended me the manga. Given that she carries this last arc hard, I will say that was a good call.)

If you can put up with everything I mentioned in order to get to the fairly compelling final act, I might tentatively recommend it, since Terror of Allegory here is only 19 chapters long. Still, I don't think anyone's hugely missing out by not reading this thing, the genre has evolved *a lot* over the past 20 years and this is not exactly a foundational release.

Interesting side note; on the scanlation page the translator actually recommends a few similar works, one of which is the MUCH better Dusk Maiden of Amnesia, which came out only a few years after this. Another reminder that even at the time this was solidly middle of the pack.

[greenhikingboots]

Book ask…20, 23, 34, 25 and any other two that you want to answer!

Thanks @connected-dots! :)

20: a book that got you out of a reading slump This is a tough one for me because my reading dedication levels fluctuate so much, but I’m not sure it has anything to do with what I’ve recently read. However…. I hadn’t read anything but fanfiction in quite a while prior to this past Christmas. But then I couldn’t think of anything else to put on my list so I was like, “Okay, books.” But I didn’t want to ask for any YA books and embarrass myself with my in-laws, right? (I’m saying that in a cheeky way). So my list ended up being memoir type books by comedians: Colin Jost’s A Very Punchable Face, Trevor Noah’s Born a Crime, and Amy Poehler’s Yes Please to name a few. I guess that’s less one book that got me out of a reading slump and more a genre and a particular circumstance that got me out of a reading slump. But imma count it. :)

23: a book that is currently on your TBR

We Were Liars is on my bookshelf, but I haven’t read it yet. I have several that fit that category but most of the others I’ve already made peace with probably never reading them. We Were Liars, I’m still telling myself I’m going to read. The premise seems like something I’d like, but the first couple pages are like, “Holy crap. Big cast of characters. I can’t keep track. I’m already over it.” But I mean, I’ve read and enjoyed other works with big casts so why not this one? I think I’ll get there. 25: a book by your favourite author Mentioned Gone Girl and Gillian Flynn in my other book ask, and I’m gonna circle back to there now. It was the first of her books I read and it gave me the strongest compulsion to read her other stuff. I think because she writes in the thriller/mystery genre and there are some twists and turns in her plots, people might just like those aspects and not look beyond them. But I’ve read each of her books multiple times and marvel at her writing on a sentence structure and word choice level. She’s just so good. And I love the way she captures feelings that are so relatable but somehow not often explored in books, TV, or film. Oh! Specific thought! I know after Gone Girl the movie came out, people made a big deal about the “Cool Girl” speech. And I just have to say I’m so glad I read it before I watched it, and that my first experience included the context of Amy’s characterization being even more fleshed out in the book. It’s just so clever and well crafted. But also… I don’t want to say the same book on this one and the last one, even if it is for different questions. So I will also mention that I love Gillian Flynn’s Sharp Objects. I’ve gotta some mother/daughter drama (trauma?) in my own life, so I really enjoyed reading Camille’s version of that. She struggles to figure out her boundaries and how to be respectful while not shrinking herself or losing sight of her own sense of self. It’s under extreme circumstances that I can’t relate to, but the core of the emotions I definitely could and Flynn captures them so well. 

34: a book featuring the enemies to lovers trope

The Atlas Six? I’m not sure if this counts because it’s the first in what is to be a series (I don’t think book 2 has come out yet). So I guess I don’t *really* know that the two enemies are going to end up lovers, but I’m pretty sure they are going to. Also, this is a book by someone who used to write for the Dramione fandom, so I read it because I was curious about them successfully making the leap into traditional publishing (though it started as a self-publishing thing). It ended up not really being my jam. But it might be the only answer I have for this question, at least if I’m trying to stick to books I’ve read rather than just books I’ve heard of. 24: a book on your nightstand A Feast For Crows, my Jonsa friends! I’ve been re-reading Brienne’s chapters. 54: a book with the best opening line I mean…. I’m a fan of the opening line of Pride & Prejudice, but who isn’t?

I did a search and Buzzfeed reminded me of this line I remember enjoying from when I read The Lovely Bones several years ago: “My name was Salmon, like the fish; first name, Susie. I was fourteen when I was murdered on December 6, 1973.”

And I also like, “Howard Roark laughed,” though I’m reluctant to admit it because the author of the book this opening line comes from is a favorite of some conservative/libertarian politicians I think are asshats. But okay, I’m here and saying it. The book is The Fountainhead by Ayn Rand. I like it better than her magnum opus, Atlas Shrugged, though I do enjoy both as thought provoking, entertaining novels. The issue is that she and a lot of dude bros who like her work think capitalism is like…. an infallible system? Gross. I don’t want to think about it anymore actually. I wish I could say I like these books without it coming with all the baggage.

But it is what it is. The end. :)

[kakujis]

Hi! I'm sorry but what does CPL mean? that's okay, i'll answer on my computer too and the app is just glitchy, it's not worth the risk.

that's true, leander could definitely be a big plot twist like he may had already figured out how to cure the MC but keep it a secret so she won't leave the city anytime soon. i've seen their tumblr blog but i cannot do that because it would remind me of the long awaited release date which is forever away LMAO. are there just characters page for the love interests or is there one for sen/elyon too?

i suppose since they are the non-humans character, it does seem likely that is the case. maybe, vere broke into the senobium and learnt stuffs that he shouldn't had ? or maybe he own them some debt or something ? that's true but all of these vital info would probably be reveal in the halfway point of each route.

if the moon was a person, it would be mhin like look at their character design! that's interesting though because i'm sure they and ais are opposites. vere is definitely eye candy but the studio had poured their hearts into their designs because the artists have added distinctive touches to their faces.

but vere's and leander (marks and scars) are the only obvious one, with the rest, you do need to look closely like mhin's beauty mark, ais's eyebrow with the shaven streak across the centre and the golden teardrops underneath kuras's eyes.

that's sound fun! good luck with that. i really like mhin because their character design solely pulled me and their character/personality because i saw myself in them which is probably a bad thing LMAO. i was leaning towards ais too but when i noticed his eyebrow, i got reminded of my brother because he naturally have that with his one so it hasn't been the same since then ;-; but i like kuras a lot!

there was a fem!li for another otome game called ozmafia but i think it was platonic romance? i think it was more of a friendship route since it came out in 2013. that's true, i cannot recall other female characters in otome game and if they are, they're normally a shit stirrer or the mc's rival.

i hope the studio see the fan comments about sen so they won't change her design because it would be such a waste! ais would be terrifying as a yandere though esp since he have those soul eaters (is that what they call) at his beck and call. but i feel like their approaches would be very different from each other like ais would be upfront and controlling but leander would be patronising and gaslighting.

like with leander, the mc would need to be smart to realise what's going on otherwise it'll be too late or they're just simply naive where they will never realise and i dk which fate is more worst.

speaking of yanderes, do you read/write yan! contents? i read them a little bit but nothing hardcore and i am writing some yan fanfics (bnha and tokyo revengers series) but i'm posting them on ao3.

kuras is very polite and private, he does fit his profession but i felt like he was someone who used to wear his heart on his sleeve but shit happened. the other origins would reveal more of him considering his dialogue towards but it'll only be trinkets/hints so ppl will play the game when it come out.

there is a possibility because his basic summary sentence that he's looking for the one thing that money cannot buy so he seem to be the only rich character. but sometimes, i do wonder if sen will be blind (?) considering her eyes and the scar/stitches on her face, it does look like she was in a horrific accident.

i'm going to add it towards the end but my shipping cost will be $20-$40 so i might just abandon the idea. i'm sure there will be a chance to buy more merch when the game come out but it's probably be more expensive than the kickstarter version.

yh, i saw that goal! do you think we might get partial voice acting for them too? but the animated intro, that is the studio's biggest dream, it's the one that they want to unlock the most.

oh, i know what that is but never heard the official japanese term for it, thanks for explaining. do you ever feel embarrass with your? because i've noticed that most of them have inappropriate designs so i never went ahead and brought them. from your body pillow case, i'm assuming you're a gamer (?)

well, i think that's a bit hasty too because if studio fail to develop the game, kickstarter won't be able to refund their pledge but i highly doubt that will happen but that's always a risk regarding kickstarters. (i feel like this is something mhin would probably say too LMAO)

i think the studio added more slots for that but are already sold out or on the last one.

hiya <3! cpl is a shortened way to say: couple! i write with a ton of shortened words n phrases, i'll keep that in mind from nyeow on! also hard agree on the app being glitchy, i've seen a ton of ppl saying even their tags aren't working and i'm like tumblr can we get it together just once!!!!

maybe! i think the way that leander is strong enough to resist the curse is telling in itself! god he's so mysteriouss, i wanna know more, sobbing. also, i think kuras may also know as well since he IS a whole angel + doctor. i didn't see any chara pages for sen/elyon yet! but i think we'll probably get those :').

i think so! either that or he willingly went to the senobium and ended up getting captured! ORRR he could've been betrayed? I know kuras used to work with the senobium and vere HATES him. EEEE MAYBE THATS IT? i'm not sure why kuras would sellout vere though.. hm. UGH NONNIE WE HAVE TO WAIT SO LONG WHILE WE THEORIZE..

YOU'RE SO RIGHT ABOUT MHIN BEING THE MOON UGH. i wanna write a drabble on that line now hehe. they're so beautiful, so pretty, so handsome and everything in between and beyond. i wanna make mhin my computer bg cause i'm soo in love with their design. and IKR LOL. ais seems to be a lot more carefree and mhin is a lot more uptight. i agree w vere too! i love his outfit a lot also, like it's total inspo for me irl ngl! honestly, i think the reason why mhin's is so subtle is cause if you look at their design compared to the others they are the brightest palette, in the sense that they're almost completely white besides their cloak!

AYYY no don't worry about that! honestly, i liked leander because he reminded me of me! super helpful and not asking for anything in return (except this is touchstarved so what do u really want leander.. :eyes:) ALSO LOL THE SIBLING TURN OFF IS SO REAL HAHA. i'm into kpop right? so no matter how handsome josh from seventeen is i CANNOT be attracted cus he has the same name LOOL.

ahhh platonic ... i like platonic love, i really do but please gimme my wife!! i actually have a couple of fem charas in my drafts, so i won't be surprised if i start something for sen when she's released and we see more of her! also i agree, i hate the 'oh theres another woman.. shes a rival.' i dont want a rival i want a best friend or gf, the heck.

AH THE SOULLESS! yes yes, he could literally use princess to sniff u out and bring u back. thats kinda sexy. i love that. absolutely agree on leander being gaslighty and ais being controlling! eeee. i think leander would be a lil more easy to read tho, especially if he's being antsy about something. i think it's cause during the demo he kinda just lets his thoughts slip out, at least from what i remember! i think being naive and unknowing is worse, cus leander has always been leander to you, sweet and kind, if not a little clingy so why is he suddenly acting like this? type of deal.

i do write yan! i'm not the best at it though, like i think my yan!kakucho n yan!baji fics are both just awright on the yan aspect, i could've gone further especially with baji's but he's so nice in my head that i couldn't lool. i have a suuuper old yan!nightowl ficlet in my drafts that i wanted to convert to a tokrev chara, i was thinking kazutora buut we'll see. also really? i need to start using ao3 more! i have my baji fic queued but i need to put my kakucho one up too :>. if u wanna share them with me anytime i'd love to read!!!

agreed with kuras, it does mention that he's failed a ton in the past, so he's probably much more guarded now even though he's still a sweetheart! it did say sen was brought back from the dead and is seeking revenge and her own death so maybe! as for elyon, eee i usually don't like rich guys kjdsdsksdf unless u reo mikage LOL. but we'll see~

ahhh that shipping is insane omfg.. >< maybe in the future they could find a way to lower shipping prices eep.. but i know thats entirely dependent on the post office, not them. also YES I SAW THE PARTIAL VOICE ACTING KADSNFSDKFN, i already have voice claims for them in my head but ofc it's all japanese va LOL. i don't know many english vas... but i was telling my friend that mhin as paku romi's role in aot(hange) is sooo spot on in my head. just paku romi in general i assign with mhin hehe. we're actually soo close to that goal already for the animated intro!! im SO EXCITED to see the next stretch goals after we hit it!!

nahh i don't feel embarrassed haha. i've become a lot more indulgent on myself and if it doesn't hurt anyone, there's no harm in having it! i don't necessarily sleep with him because i don't want my dog to accidentally pee on it (shes a senior dog who has a lot of accidents now) but he does rest on my bed! and yes i am! i play a looot of games and as of now, one of my dream careers would be to work on a game to write lore or a character in the future! maybe make my own game? who knows! a lot of them do have inappropriate designs LOL, but there are some that are relatively sfw. i know the obey me! dakimuras just came out but i read they're super expensive.. like 100+.

LOL yeah i think mhin would say that too! they're soo serious. c'mon mhin gimme a smile, -pokes-. AND YEAH THATS kinda insane to me how fast those tiers sell!! like dang!!!

[darlenefblog]

A Scandal at Stonecliffe - A Stonecliffe Novel Book 3

by Candace Camp

Publisher: ‎ Canary Street Press 

Publication date: August 20, 2024

Print length: 339 pages

Thank you to NetGalley, Canary Street Press, and Candace Camp for this advance reader copy of the book. Below is my honest review.

A rare 5 star story. Although I'm a fan of the author not all books are 5 star worthy so I don't give them out often. There's a list of characters and their relationships in the prolog that was very helpful, I hadn't read the first two books in the series, so the author didn't have to backtrack very much. There wasn't a dull moment from the first page to the last. It's a friend to lovers' trope but they weren't really friends when the book starts. Their relationship goes through all the expected stages; acquaintances, partners, uneasy friendship, trusting friendship, lovers, and finally a lovely HEA. A truly enjoyable read.

Nathan Dunbridge is a Gentleman with a capitol G. He's easy to get along with, does his best to keep the peace, doesn't lose his temper, wonderful dancer, handsome, well dressed. The kicker is he stepped aside and let his fiancée ditch him and marry her true love, that's a true honorable Gentleman. He's been licking his wounds for about a year and now that he's in London again he gets back into the rhythm of town life. At a ball he runs into Verity Cole pretending to be a wealthy widow, she is a former spy and has become a private investigator. Verity is a complicated character, so many secrets, disguises and prickly personality that figuring out who she really is kept me reading. When she takes off to look around the house for a piece of jewelry Nathan tags along. It's the beginning of Verity taking a wrecking ball to his well-ordered life. There's a fake courtship, secrets, an identity discovery, murder plots, twist with two family dynamics, romance, and a little bit of sex. It put me in mind of an old 1940's movie, they made good mysteries back then. The characters are turned around in this story with Verity the hardened PI and Nathan as the romantic sidekick. A scandal at Stonecliffe is book 3 of 3 so the series is finished; wonder what's next.

[cathygeha]

REVIEW

Her Dying Secret by Lisa Regan

Detective Josie Quinn #20

Twisty twisted tale that had me wishing that things could have been different for more than one character in this story!

What I liked: * The opening and finding out what Josie and her husband Noah are working on in their private lives

* Josie: homicide detective, survivor with huge backstory in the previous books, wife to Noah, strong, resilient, intelligent, team player, compartmentalizes, and the main character of this series,

* Noah: police department lieutenant, Josie’s husband, calm, wise, good leader, sees the big picture, there for Josie in more ways than one

* Catching up with some of the characters from previous books and wondering what parts they will play in future books

* Trying to figure out the new guy that was hired after Finn’s death

* The plot, pacing, setting, and writing

* The police procedural aspects of the story and how they managed to get some things right and other things so very wrong…till they did get them right in the end

* Thinking about how Josie’s life will change in the future - or if it will at all

* The conclusion of the book that wrapped left nothing in regard to the case dangling

* All of it really except

What I didn’t like:

* Who and what I was meant to dislike

* Thinking about how warped and twisted people can be and whether it is nature or nurture that causes this

* Having to wait to see what will happen in the next book

Did I enjoy this book? Yes

Would I read more in this series? Yes

Thank you to NetGalley and Bookouture for the ARC – This is my honest review.

4-5 Stars

BLURB

She gently opens the woman’s tightly clenched fist, uncurling each finger to reveal a square of folded paper hidden in her palm. Scrawled in thick crayon, beside a child’s crooked drawing of a red flower, is one word that sends a shiver through the evening mist: HELP It was supposed to be a routine road accident recovery, but the moment Detective Josie Quinn sees the passenger—pale and painfully thin, a sharp tool lodged in her stomach—it’s clear she was the victim of something far more sinister, and likely dead before the crash. Watching the driver taken away in an ambulance, questions spin through Josie’s mind. Where were these two women going? Was the driver trying to save a life, or hide a body? And—most heartbreaking of all—is there a child in danger, crying out for help with no reply? Josie quickly identifies the crash survivor as Mira Summers, a singleton and animal-lover on her way home from nearby stables. Mira swears she doesn’t know who the woman in the car beside her is, or how she was injured. And when she’s diagnosed with concussion and memory loss, Josie is forced to back down. But the discovery of Mira’s prints on the child’s drawing is all the proof Josie needs that Mira knows more than she’s letting on, and a witness saw Mira meeting with a man with a gnarled diamond-shaped tattoo at the stables. In a race against the clock to track down this elusive man, Josie faces danger from the most unexpected places. Pushed to her limit, can she stay alive long enough to catch the killer and save the life of an innocent child? An absolutely gripping and truly unputdownable crime thriller that will have you racing through pages until the final jaw-dropping twist hits you like a train. From an Amazon, USA Today and Wall Street Journal bestselling author, and perfect for fans of Angela Marsons, Robert Dugoni and Rachel Caine.

[chrisdeanfuller]

Ender's Saga Series Book Review

I read the book Ender's Saga series by Orson Scott Card, and the series started off excellent and was mediocre as it went along.  It’s a four-book series; Ender’s Game, Speaker for the Dead, Xenocide, and Children of the Mind.  The series revolves around a character named Ender who is brilliant and troubled.

The first book won the Hugo and Nebula awards.  It's the story of earth developing a military general, Ender, from a very early age, educated to destroy alien invaders.  It's also the story of how this intense education affects its gifted students.  I found it interesting that the author chose to incorporate the Ursla Le Guin concept of an ansible (a faster than light communications device). There's as much psychology and leadership ideas in the book as sci-fi and space ideas.  Strategy and manipulation and second-guessing are common themes.  The movie sucks compared to the book. I liked the book because it made me think.

The second book, Speaker for the Dead, was okay.  It's the story of a planet where a new species kills some humans, and they can't figure out why.  The protagonist from the first book in the series comes to the rescue.  This series is one of my son's favorites, and I can see why.  He's cerebral, spiritual and deals with some Asperger's issues in his life.  This book involves a lot of psychology and xenology as this mystery is explored.  Scriptures from the Bible occasionally pop up.  If prefer a book about aliens where the primary response is swords and guns, this is not the book for you.  I liked it, but it's not for everyone.

The third book, Xenocide, was mediocre.  I read it mostly because my son lent it to me, and he really liked it.   Ender is now in his sixties, managing a family, helping to run the town, and trying save several species from extinction. There's philosophy, theology and even some science fiction!  Sometimes the science fictions gets over explained including how faster than light communications happens and how faster then light travel could happen.  The book could have been (should have been) 200 pages shorter.  Still, there's some thought-provoking ideas and plot twists redeeming some of the negatives. This third book is about the same caliber as the second, but not nearly as good as Ender's Game.

The fourth book, Children of the Mind, was more space soap opera.  This was originally the final book of the Ender Saga, but now there are lots more books from the Ender Universe (20 total!).  There was slightly more action in this book than the previous two which helped make for a slightly more interesting read, but the main problem is that there are simply too many characters in the last three books.  And when the author tries to reveal everyone's faith, motivation, feelings and relationships, it's superfluous.  Everything wraps up nicely in the end. Like the Dune series, the first book in the series is great, and it's mostly downhill from there.

[blanketorghost]

Though your experiences are entirely valid, I myself can vouch that not everyone reacts to fat shaming and weight based bullying in that same way. Especially since I was able to see/experience both sides of the spectrum with me being shamed for being 'skeleton-like' and my friend being bullied for being fat.

In fact, our choices in style were completely reversed. She used tight and figure hugging clothing often, especially after reaching puberty, whilst I myself chose baggy and oversized clothing. I think it also comes to show how Azul views his body post-dieting. When someone starts a diet/working out to achieve a certain body image, they start wearing clothes that fitthem better to show off their progress. I'm sure you've seen a myriad of 'progress videos' on tiktok where people in their weight loss journey wear some of their old clothes vs their new clothes to show off just how much weight they've lost. Not to mention the absolute hellscape that is ana inspo pages and forums. Azul likes to show off his figure because it is proof of how much he's progressed in his weight loss journey (as unfortunately unhealthy as it is). Why? Because it also asserts his superiority over the bullies he had. He can no longer be made fun of for being fat if he starves himself enough to not be. Body image issues are far more complex and I honestly am not qualified to even go deep enough on a character's backstory to fully encompass his thought processes as, again, I am the opposite. But from what's been shown in his story + my personal witness account and what social media shows, it's more probable that the ways Azul deals with his self image in relation to weight is more of a twisted way of self-assurance and pride over what he's 'achieved'. Just look at Eugenia Cooney for example (TW: extreme ED). Honestly, it makes me think that the way Yana illustrates Azul vs What he'd actually look like, is extremely misleading since he was created to appeal to teenage girls rather than show accurate rep. In fact, it often makes me feel sick to think about how realistically Azul would look like below his clothes, because it reminds me of my childhood self that was so thin I had to wear children's clothing far into my teenage years (which made me extremely ashemed of myself)

Also, I disagree on the twins' part. Sure, Azul may have initially told them to go away, but the thing about the twins is that they constantly pestered and seeked Azul's company until he relented because he was entertaining wether Azul wanted to or not. Floyd, Jade and Azul are keenly aware of this. And all three in Ch3 say as much. When the prefect asks Jade and Floyd why they hang out with him, Jade says that it's because they find him 'fun' in a way that implies that they see him as more like a funny little pet rather than as a person. At first, I think Azul would've pushed back as we see in his flashback, but Azul is also incredibly shreud and resourceful, and I think he would've easily caught onto the twins' appeal towards him. So he himself knows that the reason why the twins stick to him is because of the chaos he creates via his contracts. They themselves said they'd drop him as soon as he's no longer fun to hang around.

As for the Ramshackle thing, I believe that the entire plot is over the top ridiculous, and it was made that way to raise the stakes to urgency. Sure, the anemone problem is a big thing, but it could've been solved over a long period of time. Twst's game design is not created for these types of long, drawn-out narratives. Think mlp, for example. They have 20 episodes per season, all of which are 11-20 minues long, depending on what the network gives them. Twst is a game that, instead, has very quick chapters, often taking 5 minutes in the shortest. And sure, the books have been getting longer progressively, but let's compare Ignyhide, which had 80+ chapters divided into 200+ mini-chapters and routes. That's a lot more compared to Octavinelle's 39. There's definitely not much space to create a long, in-depth story. So, how do we create a sense of urgency? By upping the stakes. And what was the biggest achievement for the MC at the time? Ramshackle.

It is also important to note that Azul wasn't the only one who had Ramshackle as collateral, but Crowley too threatened to kick out MC if they did not stop Azul. If they lost Ramshackle to Azul, they could go into another dorm, as shown by Riddle and Jack's compassion. But if Crowley decided to basically disown MC, they would not even have the means to pay for their food. The staff also needed to create tension that would fit the Little Mermaid movie and the stakes for the 3 day period given for the plot.

For Ariel, her voice was her biggest asset. For the MC, it was Ramshackle. And sure, one could argue Ariel's story had lower stakes because she would've still been a princess, and she still would've had a home, but in the original Little Mermaid, the mermaid would've died if she didn't get true love's kiss. The stakes were much higher. And with Twst being a much more mature interpretation of Disney stories, Ramshackle would've been the equivalent of Ariel's voice and a better way to raise the stakes. (Because let's face it, if it weren't for that, MC wouldn't have been personally affected by the contracts. They were never an anemone and could've let Ace, Deuce, and Grim work for Azul without much concequence)

Many people have already shown why Ramshackle would've been an awful second location for a 2nd branch café due to the location and cost of repairs. So why did Azul take that? Because it is something he knows MC values. Much like Azul with all of his contracts, which was something he worked hard for and honed for the entirety of his life, MC worked hard to restore Ramshackle to be a liveable place for them and Grim. In Azul's eyes, it is an equivalent exchange. And by keeping Ramshackle's ownership over MC's head, he ensures they won't try anything too rash and aggressive. That is Azul's MO. To instill fear. Was it cruel? Yes. Of course it was cruel. These characters are twisted off of disney villains. Which are branded as delightfully evil. The only one who probably doesn't fit that mark is the queen of hearts, and that is because Wonderland works with an entirely different set of morals, logic, and rulesets we are not meant to understand. But I would never pinpoint any character as more evil than the others. Especially when disney is so finicky about it. Maleficent at one time was considered the most evil disney villain up until her live action movie era, and she was up against the likes of Frollo.

Also, Azul never went out of his way to go against the. In fact, he probably wouldn't have bothered us if we hadn't tried to free all of the anemones (upwards of 200+ students, i believe). And the MC wouldn't have bothered unless their friends weren't involved. In fact, it is made clear that Azul's plans to take over Ramshackle were something he had wanted to do before MC became its resident, as stated in-game at how Azul had been pressuring Crowley to sell the location since his freshman year. MC, in all honesty, was just a minor inconvenience to Azul, lol. We were never that important to him in the first place. The reason why he gathered info on us wasn't because of malicious targeting either, but rather because he keeps tabs on everyone as a form to maintain a sense of control.

I think that an important thing people forget when playing twst is that the MC is never the catalyst for the events that happen in the game (in fact, this is a common complaint on the fandom; about how the MC is barely involved in the events of the game). But rather, all events and overblots would've happened regardless. Ace would've still defied Riddle and caused a riot, Crowley would've still caught on to the injured magift players and found out Leona, Leona and other anemones would've still banded together to try and defy Azul and his conteacts, eventually resulting in overblots— which visually represent psychotic breaks.

Also, book 6 is still very very shortly after everyone's overblots. Riddle's was at the start of the year, so that places it at roughly 6 months ago. Leona's was at the middle of the semester, which would've been 5-ish months. Azul's was right after midterms aka the end of the 1st semester, so that places it squarely at about 3-4months ago. Jamil's was during christmas break, which would've happened 1-ish weeks after Azul's overblot, Vil's was at around february-march (given how it was stull winter during VDC) and chapter 6 takes place A WEEK after Vil's overblot.

I can not stress this enough as a psychiatric patient and as someone who has family and friends who struggle/struggled with mental illness. Recovery and change take a lot of fucking time. Especially changing behaviors that have been ingrained for years. Riddle is still being abused by his mother. Azul only stopped being bullied only around 4 years ago (less than a third of his life). Jamil is still an indentured servant. Leona still has lethargy (largely caused by) undiagnosed chronic depression and Vil is still constantly overscrutinized by both the public and himself. These patterns of behavior take years to change. It took me 3 years into my recovery to actually stop self-sabotaging, and even then, I still had a warped sense of self-worth. A month or two of therapy simply isn't enough to see substantial change. And these boys have been in less than 6 months of it.

I know it is difficult to have a sense of time due to the game's slow release schedules, but that is a technical limitation of the medium, and in-universe the actual amount of time that has passed has been extremely short. It's unfair to criticize the characters' lack of growth when such little amount of time has passed.

And to address the tags, I am not using Azul's trauma to justify or minimize his actions, but rather I am explaining how his trauma affects his day to day interactions with others and his thought process.

I and my friend are living proof that bullied kids don't have to always become bullies themselves later in life, but that does not mean that there isn't a slippery slope that can lead others to become ones. Hence why discussing and taking into account other perspectives from people with other experiences is so important, it makes you understand others better. You don't need to like Azul to understand him, but learning to understand a character can make their story much more insightful.

My thoughts on Azul:

I haven’t really talked about my feelings for TWST characters but I feel strongly about Azul in the way that I very much dislike him.

- Spoilers for Book 3 and maybe 4

- This is all my opinion really but I don’t think it’s super unfounded.

First off, I feel like his game design could have been better. Yes, he looks fine (in my opinion) but I feel like the game creators had so many options in what to do with him. With Jade and Floyd, even in human form they still somehow resemble eels, but there’s no part of Azul’s design that really shows off more of his octopus merman side. (Side comment: I think that the game designers did Octavinelle dirty with their dorm uniforms. It’s literally just a suit with some accessories. Like come on)

Second off, the part that I really dislike is how his character is portrayed. I know that he is based off of Ursula and therefore has to act like her, but I feel like his backstory that we see after his overblot doesn’t really provide a good enough reason for how he turned out like this and how he acts toward other people.

More on the second point - we see Azul to be bullied which pushes him to want to be better and get back at those who made fun of him. I think that’s a reasonable thing to do - as someone who has been bullied, I have definitely thought about what it would be like to get ahead of them and make them regret being mean to me - not in a violent way but in a ‘they realize I’m so much better and more talented’ kinda way.

But the thing is, Azul doesn’t stop at that

We see that people are having things taken and we see how Azul begins his contract making and such. But he goes beyond that, he starts to make contracts and screw over people who DIDN’T do anything with him. We know from Book 3 that he ran his anemone-study guide stunt last year as well. None of those kids bullied him for his weight, he simply did it to get ahead and be ‘owed’ something.

What I think happened is that Azul felt good after getting the better of those kids when he was young, and then just continued it. His actions in the TWST timeline can’t be justified by him being bullied in the past because he’s already gone above and beyond for that.

That also pulls out another point - but I (don’t hate me for this) think that Azul’s overblot was the most undeserving. Yes, it’s painful to lose something you worked hard and long for. Yes, initially the trauma of being bullied was what got you on this path. But the way that he freaked out, put people in danger, all for bullying as kid? It doesn’t seem justified enough.

One of the main things I’ve seen people complain that they don’t really like about the game is how it doesn’t really seem like the Overblot Boys get enough of a character arc, as their personalities stay the same. This is also true of Azul. In Book 4, he acts exactly the way that he acts in Book 3, and it annoys me that all these people are going through TRAUMATIZING EVENTS and don’t seem to change, while also the player never gets to see what consequences they get.

Also did we ever see the reason why Azul is very ‘I did this now you owe me’ ‘I can’t accept your help because I’ll be in your debt’??

Anyway yeah, that’s my take on Azul. Pls don’t come at me for it.

[peachscribe]

peach’s summer book list

i had a lot of fun compiling the list of books i read during the 20-21 winter, so i decided i would do a summer one as well! i still have a lot of books i own but haven’t read, so im definitely not lacking in material

if you didn’t see my winter list, how my book list works is basically like this: i read a book that i own but have not previously read, write a short summary immediately after finishing the book, write down my thoughts on the book, and then provide a rating for the book. i also might include background info on why i read this particular book/feelings about the author, but that depends on the book. that’s how each entry works

without further ado, let’s get started!

1. Grasshopper Jungle by Andrew Smith

okay so i absolutely adore another book by andrew smith (written after grasshopper jungle) called the alex crow. it’s one of my favorite books of all time, so naturally i wanted to see if grasshopper jungle would make me feel similarly. just like the alex crow, grasshopper jungle’s plot is. so fucking weird. it stars austin szerba, a teenage polish kid who lives in ealing, iowa, and is often sexually confused regarding his girlfriend shann and his best friend robby. and in ealing, iowa, austin and robby accidentally and unknowingly unleash an unstoppable army of huge six-foot-tall praying mantis bugs that only want to do two things: fuck and eat. and i just have to say: andrew smith’s got an absolutely dynamo writing style. alex crow is similar, where it’s a book about kind of everything all at once, framed in a moment centering around teenage boys. it’s fantastic, and it’s more than a little gross, and i love it. this book made me feel so many things, and i thought austin was such an amazing narrator and main character to identify with. this book has it all: shitty teenage boy humor, fucked up science experiments, and poetic imagery that will make you want to cry. and explicit lgbt characters.

412/10 andrew smith what do you put in your water i just want to know

2. Burn by Patrick Ness

patrick ness has written a plethora of some of my favorite books (such as a monster calls, the chaos walking trilogy, and the rest of us just live here) so when i saw this one in the store i knew it would be a great one. burn is an alternate history fantasy that takes place in 1957 frome, washington, during the height of the cold war, and it begins with a girl named sarah and her father hiring a dragon to help out on their farm. but there’s not just dragons, farm living, and cold war tensions; there’s also a really shitty small town cop, a cult of dragon worshippers and their deadly teenage assassin, a pair of fbi agents, and a prophecy that sarah’s newly hired dragon claims she’s a part of. i think eoin colfer’s highfire was on my winter list, which also featured a story that included dragons and shitty cops, so when i first began burn i thought it was funny to have two books that had both things. you know, if you had a nickel etc etc. but that’s really where the similarities end because burn is entirely it’s own monster (dragon). burn is entirely invested in its world, and its fascinating. not only that, i had no clue where the book would take me next. there were so many surprises and amazing twists that honestly just blew me away. this book also includes beautifully written complicated discussions on family, race, and love - it features interracial and queer romances as the two most prominent romance plots which was such a nice surprise from a book i wasn’t expecting to have that kind of representation. this book is witty, fast-paced, and a very heartening read - i absolutely adored it.

9/10 dragons and becoming motivated by the power of love and friendship are so fucking cool

3. As Meat Loves Salt by Maria McCann

i hate this book! as meat loves salt is a historical fiction novel which takes place in seventeenth century england, which is going through a grisly civil war. the protagonist, jacob cullen, is a servant for a wealthy household and is engaged to another servant in the house. but due to certain events that are almost entirely jacob’s fault, he flees the house and is separated from his wife. from there, he joins the royal army and meets a kind soldier, ferris, and the two become fast friends. jacob and ferris’s relationship begins to bridge past friendly, and jacob struggles with his homoerotic feelings as well as the growing obsession and violence inside him. also, they try to start a colony. listen, i don’t know how to describe the book because so much happens, but it basically just follows jacob and all the terrible decisions he makes because he is, truly, a terrible person. ferris is kind and good, and jacob is scum of the earth. he sucks so bad. the entire time i was reading this book (which took absolutely so long), all i wanted was for jacob to just get his ass handed to him. i wanted to see him suffer. and it’s not like i just personally don’t like him - i believe the book purposefully depicts him as unsympathetic even though he is the narrator. i did enjoy the very in depth and accurate portrayal of what life would’ve been like in seventeenth century england, and i think it was interesting to read a character that is just the absolute worst person you’ve ever encountered and see him try and justify his actions, so if you enjoy that kind of thorough writing, then this book would be perfect for you. however, i did not see that bitch ass motherfucker jacob cullen suffer enough. i’d kill him with my bare hands.

2/10 diversity win! the worst man on earth is mlm!

4. This Savage Song by Victoria Schwab

i know ive had a friend tell me how great one of schwab’s other book series is, but truthfully i bought this book because the cover is sick as hell and it was on a table in the store that advertised for buy two get one free, i think. something like that. anyway, this savage song takes place in a future in which monsters, for whatever reason, suddenly became real and out for blood in a mysterious event nicknamed the phenomenon. august flynn is one of these monsters, but he takes no pride in that fact and only wants to feel human. kate harker is the daughter of a ruthless man and is trying her hardest to be ruthless, too, but deep down she knows it’s just an act. their city, verity, stands divided, and kate and august stand on either side - but when august is sent on a mission to befriend kate in the hopes of stopping an all out war, the lines begin to blur. this book rules. august and kate are such interesting and dynamic characters, and the narrative is familiar while still being capable of twisting the story around and taking the feet out from under you in really compelling ways. this savage song is part of the monsters of verity duology, and i can’t wait to dive into how the story continues and finishes.

11/10 sometimes you can judge a book by it’s cover

4a. Our Dark Duet by Victorian Schwab

this is the sequel and finale for this savage song and i’d figure i’d update everyone: fantastic ending, beautiful, showstopping, painful.

12/10 loved it and will definitely be keeping an eye out for schwab’s other books

5. White is for Witching by Helen Oyeyemi

oh boy. okay. white is for witching is about a house, and it is about the women who have lived inside of it. when her mother dies abroad, miranda silver begins to act strangely, and there’s nothing her father or her twin brother seem to be able to do about it. she develops an eating disorder and begins to hear voices in the silver family house, converted to a bed and breakfast by miranda’s dad; and she begins to lose herself in the house and the persistent presence of her family legacy. white is for witching switches perspective dizzingly and disorientingly between miranda, her twin eliot, miranda’s friend from school named ore, and the house itself. this story is a horror story as much as it as a tragedy as much as it is a romance as much as it is a bunch of other things. oyeyemi brings race, sexuality, nationality, and family into this story and forces you not to look away. this book is poetry.

(like i mentioned briefly, this book heavily deals with topics of race and closely follows miranda’s eating disorder. read responsibly, and take care of yourselves)

15/10 this book consumed me and i think i’ll have to read it another 10 more times to feel it properly

6. These Violent Delights by Chloe Gong

okay. okay. strap in for a ride. these violent delights is a romeo and juliet style story, taking place in glittering 1920’s shanghai. the city stands divided - not only between the foreign powers encroaching on chinese land, but also between the scarlet gang and the white flowers, who are at the height of a generations-long blood feud. juliette cai, heir to the scarlets, has recently returned from four years abroad and is determined to prove herself ruthless enough to lead. roma montagov, heir to the white flowers, is standing strenuously on his place as next in line due to a slip up four years prior and is desperate to keep hold of his title. and in the midst of juliette and roma’s burning history with each other threatening to combust, an unnatural monster lurks in the waters of shanghai, loosing a madness on scarlets and white flowers alike. this book has it all - scorned ex lovers, political intrigue, deadly monsters, and all set on a glamorous backdrop of the roaring twenties. i absolutely was enraptured by this book and the way it plays around the story of romeo and juliet so well that it easily became it’s own monster, but with the punches and embraces of something classically shakespearan. gong does just an absolutely breathtaking job of fitting this fantastical story amid the larger world of shanghai and the real life historical events that had shaken the city to its core. completely immersive and outstandingly heart racing.

17/10 i was chewing on my fingernails for the last thirty pages and will continue to do so until the sequel is released (our violent ends, 16 nov 21)

7. The Antiques by Kris D’Agostino

you ever heard of the american dysfunctional family story? this is most definitely that. at the same time george westfall’s cancer takes a turn for the worse, a hurricane hits the east coast, and suddenly all at once the issues of his health, the hurricane, and all three of his children’s achingly dysfunctional adult lives are crashing into each other. reunited by george’s death, the westfall siblings have to face their grief, each other, and the problems in their own lives they attempted to put on hold while planning their father’s memorial. this is a nice story about grief and loss and love and somehow finding the humor amidst it all.

(this book does include a depiction of an autistic child who does experience several pretty bad meltdowns due to ignorant people around him not understanding how to cater to his needs. im not an authority on what depictions are or are not harmful, but i do believe this depiction is ultimately loving and well-intended.)

7/10 it made me laugh and cry and was generally one of those books that somehow hit you close to home

8. Fierce Fairytales by Nikita Gill

fierce fairytales is a poetry anthology that reimagines classic fairytales from a modern, feminist viewpoint, acknowledging that the line between hero and villain, monster and damsel, are not as clear cut as the classics try to make you believe. this book also includes illustrations done by the author herself, which i think is really cool. my personal favorite story reimagining was the story of peter pan and captain hook, called ‘boy lost’ which looked at how peter and hook’s relationship began and rotted. all in all, i think this collection of stories had a lot of important things to say and said them in frank, easy to understand poetry and prose.

7/10 beautiful message and pretty prose, but at times a little cliche

and that’s all from the summer! my fall semester starts tomorrow, and overall i feel very good about all the reading i did this summer. i even read four other books not on this list for work! so i definitely feel like i made the most out of my time, and im really glad i was able to read so many stories that made me feel a variety of different things

thanks so much for reading this list, and let me know if you read or have read any of these books and tell me what you think of them!

happy reading<3

[bi-bard]

Carry On - Winchester Brothers Imagine (Supernatural)

Title: Carry On

Characters: Sam and Dean (father figures), Castiel (father figure of sorts), Jack (romantic)

Requested: Nope

Word Count: 3,331 words

Warning(s): SPOILERS FOR THE END OF SUPERNATURAL, character death, cussing, sobbing, a lot of pain

Summary: (Season 15, Episode 20) After losing Jack and Castiel, (Y/n) thought it was over. However, even when he doesn't have power, Chuck seems to have a twist written in his story.

Author's Note: Here it is. The promised finale rewrite. I am using the plot that I used in the script rewrite that I did. WHICH IS NOW UP AND YOU SHOULD READ IT BECAUSE IT'S NEARLY 30 PAGES AND TOOK ME A WHILE TO WRITE IT!

CLICK HERE!

Due to how long this was, this only addresses 15x20. 15x18 and 15x19 will be written about separately because there's a lot to unpack there. Check my original character post here to check to see if they're up yet!

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It was supposed to be a good day.

The last few months had been hard.

Castiel died. Jack became God. It was just Sam, Dean, and me.

Dean was overjoyed when he found out about the Akron annual pie festival. It was a chance for all of us to relax.

On the way there, I sat in the backseat quietly. Dean had glanced back at me. It was scary to think about how all three of us seemed to go through the same thing all at once. Each seeming to lose the love of our lives.

"Kid," I looked over at Dean. "How are you feeling?"

"Just tired," I mumbled.

That wasn't even a lie.

I was tired. I was absolutely exhausted. It had been a few months since Jack and Cas had left us. I tried to keep myself from bringing the boys down too far.

We were all trying to be there for each other. Some days were better than others but I hadn't gotten past the tired feeling that weighed me down every morning.

"Are you sure," Dean asked. I nodded, giving him a small grin. "Okay."

We pulled up to the pie fest and Dean looked like a kid on Christmas. He ran off to get pie. Sam and I found a bench and took a moment to sit in silence.

"Why haven't you reached out to Eileen," I asked. Sam looked at me but didn't respond. "We know she's alive. Jack brought everyone back."

"I just... I don't want to drag her back into this," he replied. "She doesn't deserve this."

I leaned on his shoulder and wrapped my arms around his torso. He hugged me back. I moved back when Dean walked over with a big box with several pieces of pie inside.

"Alright, no more sad faces," Dean said. He was the king of denying his feelings. He passed us each a fork. "Pie can make almost anyone feel better."

I took a bite of the piece that in front of me. Sam had different ideas. He moved me slightly as he picked up a piece of pie and smushed it against Dean's face.

I put my hand over my mouth as I started to laugh at him.

"You're right," Sam nodded. "I feel much better."

"So do I," I replied.

Dean glared at us.

Then... there was an earthquake.

Except it only lasted a few seconds. Sam and I stood up instantly. An earthquake lasting seconds was an instant call for us to get involved.

Dean looked at his pie and pouted at us. He sighed, standing up to place the pie on the bench. He wiped his face as he followed us to the car.

Sam found that the epicenter of the incident was about an hour outside of town.

Dean pulled the car to a stop as we spotted a tear in the Earth. It looked like the one Chuck had made when he released all the souls from hell.

Jack was standing on the edge of the tear.

"Jack," I called, scared to walk too close to the hole.

"Hello," they waved at us.

I chuckled at him before jogging over and hugging him.

"I've missed you," I mumbled.

"I missed you too," they replied. Jack stepped back, grabbing my hand and walking toward Sam and Dean. "I'm happy you're all here."

"So you know what's happening," Sam asked. Jack nodded. "What is it?"

"Amara," Jack explained. "When Chuck... absorbed her, she didn't actually become his equal. He was draining her. The less darkness there is-"

"The less balance," I finished their thought. They nodded.

"Someone needs to be a vessel for the darkness... for the mark," Jack continued.

"So, we've gotta find you a sister," Dean asked.

"It's not that easy," they replied. "It needs to be someone who's had the mark."

"So it has to be...," Dean trailed off. We all looked at him. There was silence as he walked away for a moment. I flinched when he hit the impala. "Son of a bitch!"

We all kept quiet.

"We worked our asses off to get that damn mark off of my arm," he seethed. "I went through hell and back!"

I walked over and touched his arm. He flinched, causing me to move back. When he saw me, his face softened. It was like acceptance. He sighed, pulling me into a hug. We stood there for a moment in silence.

"Don't go," I mumbled. I felt like that small child they saved. All over again, I was scared and confused and just wanted to hold onto everything I cared about. "Please."

"(Y/n)," he muttered, stepping back. Sam walked over to us. "I worked my ass off to get rid of that mark... but I also worked my ass off to keep everyone safe. I'm not going to let the world end if I can stop it."

"But...," I trailed off. I felt selfish but I had already lost so much. I didn't want to say goodbye to anything else.

"Look at me," Dean said. "Both of you, look at me."

Sam and I looked at Dean.

"You two are my world," he explained. "If I can save you, then that's what matters. My job is to protect you. Both of you."

I sniffled as my eyes filled with tears.

"I love you both," he continued. He pulled Sam, mumbling into his ear. I couldn't quite make out what was being said. He pulled me into another hug after him. "You're my kid, got it? I don't want you to forget how amazing you are. You're a badass, kid. You've saved people, you've become an unstoppable force. I love you."

"I love you too, Dean," I said, clutching onto his jacket. "You're my hero."

"I'm no hero, kid," he stepped back.

"You're saving the world, you're a hero," I replied.

Dean smiled at me before walking forward. He stood in front of Jack.

"I'm sorry," Jack said quietly.

"No one's mad at you," Dean promised. Jack looked at Sam and me. I smiled at them as best I could. They were not the villain here.

We watched Dean reach his hand out to Jack. Jack grabbed Dean's hand. As bright light surrounded them, Sam and I looked away.

When we looked back, they were gone and the tear was closed. Balance had been restored.

I looked at Sam. He pulled me into a hug instantly.

I don't know how long we stood there. I just remember feeling so lost and scared. I didn't know what was next or how to find out. It was terrifying.

Our drive home was quiet. I curled up in the passenger seat of Baby and stared out the window. I let tears fall silently, not wanting to distract Sam from driving. I could feel him looking at me every couple of minutes but I didn't want to look back at him.

We pulled up to the bunker. It didn't feel right. Nothing about this felt right. The bunker felt off. It was like the universe had shifted off of its axis.

Sam was closing the door as I walked down the stairs. I could point everywhere that Dean was supposed to be. Where Cas was supposed to be. Where Jack was supposed to be.

I made it to the threshold between the library and the map room before I just couldn't go any farther. I let my legs give out and fell on the floor.

And I screamed.

Had it been any other day, I would’ve scared Sam. Hell, I would’ve scared myself. Now, I was too angry for all of that.

I sobbed and cursed and screamed.

At any force that had a hand to play in my life. At any force that tried to make my life their favorite game or story. At any force that would listen.

And in my darkest moment, I was something to be feared.

Sam knelt next to me, pulling me into a hug. I pushed and punched like I was trying to get away from him. He just held on. He closed his eyes and held on tighter. The only thing in the world that didn’t fear me in that moment was Sam.

"I'm sorry... I'm sorry," he mumbled into my hair. He blamed himself for me being in this life. He always had. Dean had too.

"Everything," I sobbed. "They... took... everything!"

"I know," I felt him kiss the top of my head and start rubbing my back.

Dean’s dog walked over, nudging me with his nose so I would put my hand on his fur.

I sobbed until I couldn't anymore. My throat hurt and it felt like someone had punched me in the head.

“Can you stand,” Sam asked. I shrugged. Slowly, he guided me off the floor. “There you go. Come on. I know you’re probably not tired but you should probably lay down.”

“I’m sorry,” I said as we walked down the hall of the bunker. “You’ve lost so much too… I’m so sorry.”

He shook his head, “None of that is your fault.”

Sam pushed my door open and let me walk inside. All I did was pull off my combat boots and lay down. Sam threw my blankets over me.

“Will you stay here,” I asked. “Please?”

“Yeah,” he nodded. “I’ll be right back, okay?”

I nodded, thanking him quietly. He closed my door on his way out. I rolled over onto my back.

I stared at my ceiling. With a sigh, I sat up, clasping my hands together. I didn’t know if anyone was listening or if anyone could hear at all, but it made me feel a little bit better.

“Hi Jack,” I said quietly, my voice already shaking. “I know being God is important work and that you’re busy but… I wanted to say that I love you and I miss you. I know you’re doing great things. I just hope you can find the time to visit one day. Thank you for letting me feel loved… no matter how long it was for… you will never know how grateful I truly am for that. I love you.”

I took a deep breath as my tears started all over again.

“Hi Dean,” I continued. “I have so many things to say to you. But I want you to know that I’m not angry with you. I never was. I probably never could be. Thank you. Thank you for saving me, helping me, making me a better hunter… being like a father to me. You’ve helped raise me and I’ll never forget you. I miss you, Dean. And I love you. Also, I know what Cas said to you before the Empty got him. And I hope you two have found a way to be happy together.”

My door opened and Sam walked in with a blanket or two, a pillow, and the cot I packed for hunts. He furrowed his eyebrows at me. He put everything down quietly.

“And Cas,” I said. Sam just sat on the edge of my bed, listening. “You raised a great kid. If my instincts are correct, then Jack fixed what happened to you. You and I met the boys around the same time. The last thing any of us expected was for an angel to become such an important part of our lives. You have saved me more times than I can count. You’ve helped me through everything. I hope that you’re okay. You deserve happiness, Cas. You’ve done so much good for the world. I hope you and Dean are happy, wherever you are. Thank you for helping to raise me. Thank you for making my life so much better. Goodbye.”

I dropped my hands and closed my eyes. Sam scooted over and hugged me again.

“Do you think they could hear me,” I asked.

“Yeah, I really do,” Sam replied.

I didn’t know it then, but Sam had spent the whole drive home praying silently to them. Begging them for help and for comfort. He felt like he had failed me last time he was on his own… and he didn’t understand that I wasn’t angry. I would only learn that later when I found that he had written it somewhere.

I leaned back. I saw Sam was holding back tears. I carefully leaned up, kissing his forehead, mumbling that it was okay if he needed to cry.

That’s when he walks crumbled.

Sam started shaking and he hugged me again. I ran a hand through his hair. I pressed a gentle kiss to the side of his head.

For a moment, as Sam and I sit in our pain, comforting and hurting all at once, I could’ve sworn I heard something.

It was quiet. And it felt like I could’ve imagined it.

But I could’ve sworn I heard a small chorus of “Thank you��� and “Love you too.”

The idea gave me a strange sense of comfort.

"Hey," Sam wiped his eyes as he leaned back. He grabbed something behind him. I chuckled as he handed me my old wolf plushie. "I spotted it on Jack's bed on the way back."

I smiled at it.

"I'm not going anywhere," Sam promised. "Not again. I won't do that again."

I nodded.

"Do you think Cas and Dean found each other," I asked, messing with the ears of the plushie.

"I don't think Jack would let Cas stay in the Empty," Sam mumbled. I nodded again.

"I just... I need a win, y'know?"

Sam nodded.

We sat in silence for a while. Sam moved to rest against the wall and I just leaned back on his shoulder. Somehow, we both managed to fall asleep.

--Next Day--

I woke up to the bunker door shutting. I looked over and Sam was still there. So... who the hell was at the door?

I carefully grabbed the gun I kept in my bedside drawer (a habit passed along by the brothers). I walked down the hall slowly, my gun raised. I heard footsteps in the library.

"Hey," I yelled, aiming my gun at the figure. Nothing. I walked close enough to press my gun into their back.

“It’s me,” Eileen said and held her hands up. I moved so she could turn around.

"Eileen," I asked. She nodded. "Sam!"

I placed the gun on the table and pulled her into a tight hug. She hugged me back. I almost sobbed into her shoulder.

There it was. The win I needed.

I stepped back when I heard Sam run in. He looked at Eileen and then at me and then back to Eileen. He did the same thing I did, running over and pulling her into a hug.

I stepped back, letting them have their moment together without any interference.

My heart still hurt, knowing I wasn't going to get a moment like that, but I was still happy to see them smile so much. If anyone deserved it, it was them.

--Time Skip--

Years passed.

Sam and Eileen went on to live the apple pie life. A son named Dean, a nice house, they had it all. I had begged them to find their perfect life. I would visit, call, and do anything to keep in touch and protect them.

I stayed in the bunker as long as possible, along with Miracle. I started hunting with Claire and Alex. Once I got too old to actually go out hunting, I became a hub for supplies, lore checks, and cover for the hunters trying to fake being F.B.I. To put it simply, I had become Bobby.

I was there when Sam died. Eileen and their son offered me a place to stay, but I refused. I wanted to go back to the bunker.

I was aware of when it was my time to go. I passed the bunker onto two hunters that had proven themselves time and time again.

They reminded me of Sam and Dean. Compassionate and brave. The strength of a hunter lived inside of them. They promised to take care of the bunker.

Sam's son and the two young hunters were there when I died. Many of the people I knew were gone before I passed on. They either had grown old or they were hunters and had a shorter life expectancy than most. Those three comforted me, promising that it was going to be okay when I left.

I was shocked when I found myself on a path surrounded by trees. I understood that it had to be heaven but it wasn't one of my memories. It was strange. I looked down at myself. I was back in the body of my 21-year-old self.

I walked up the pathway and found a bridge. In the middle was the impala. Dean and Cas stood there, holding hands and talking to Sam, who was leaning on the railing. Dean spotted me first, his eyes widening as he realized who I was.

"(Y/n)," he yelled.

"Dean," I took off running at the same time he did.

We met halfway, hugging each other tightly. Dean laughed in my ear as he picked me up. He put me back down, grabbing the sides of my face.

"Is this real," I asked. He nodded.

"Yeah, kid, it's real," he replied.

I stepped back. Sam looked like I had so distinctly remembered, obnoxiously nice hair, no grey yet. It was like he had never aged after Dean had left.

"Sammy," I mumbled, running over to hug him. He hugged me just as tight as Dean. "Your son is amazing. You would be so proud of him."

"I know I would," he replied. "You were there to keep an eye on him."

I stepped back and looked at Cas.

"Gosh," I said. He smiled at me. "You came back."

He nodded, looking down at himself. I ran into a hug, kind of jumping on him. I closed my eyes. He made Dean happy and I couldn't ask for anything more.

"I'm happy for you and Dean," I whispered.

Cas chuckled in my ear, "Thank you."

I opened my eyes and almost fell over. I pulled back and Cas grinned at me like he instantly knew who I was looking at.

Still in the same outfit as I last saw them in was Jack.

They stood at the other end of the bridge. They picked up their hand, waving at me like they had done so many times before.

"Jack," I finally yelled. I sprinted down the bridge, hugging him as tightly as I possibly could. I clutched onto their jacket. I started crying. "I didn't rush."

"I know," they mumbled.

I stepped back slightly, just wanting to actually look at them. I laughed at myself, wiping my tears away.

Jack smiled at me.

They leaned down, cupped the sides of my face, and kissed me softly. I kissed them back a little more aggressively. I had been waiting for this moment for decades.

"I love you," I said as I pulled back.

"I love you too," they replied, smiling widely.

"Are you two done making out," Dean called over, his eyes covered with his hand. I laughed, rolling my eyes at him. He uncovered his eyes. "You have some people to see."

I walked over, holding on tightly to Jack's hand as they walked with me.

"Who," I asked.

"Jack tore down all the walls," Dean explained. "Everyone is altogether. So... it's time for a big family dinner. With everyone."

All of us smiled at each other.

"Load up," Dean yelled, running to the impala. We all followed him.

As we drove through heaven, I felt an overwhelming sense of calm. I laid my head on Jack's shoulder and let out a soft sigh as I relaxed. This was how it was supposed to be.

Through every loss, every moment of pain or fear, every argument.

This was my family. My true family.

And- no matter what- it was perfect to me.

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Masterlist

What I Write For

Request Guidelines

Musical Prompts

Small Moments With…

When Worlds Collide (Doctor Who Crossover Series) Masterlist

Some Original Characters

folklore/evermore Writing Challenge (and Masterlist)

[thejakeformerlyknownasprince]

Why does Cassie get so much hate? I never really got it as she, Marco, and Jake were my favorites.

My two cents: Laying the dislike for Cassie entirely at the feet of misogynoir would be oversimplifying the issue.  However, ignoring the role of misogynoir in the sheer depth of hatred Cassie gets would also be oversimplifying the issue.

Comments such as “Cassie should be lined up against a wall and shot”; “if Jake had any sense he would’ve forced her off the team”; “I fucking hate her... she’s such a Mary Sue... she should’ve been put in a refrigerator instead of that other character I won’t spoil...” are all over Reddit and Facebook [all actual quotes from Animorphs fan pages; not linking to them] to this day.  And yeah, I have a sneaking suspicion that she gets not just dislike or indifference but virulent hatred from a subset of fans at least partially because of her role as a Black girl.  A fat Black girl.  A Black girl who is not traditionally feminine.  A Black girl who consistently chooses to avoid violence, even when being violent would solve the plot faster than having compassion.  There is a part of me that strongly suspects she would still be criticized by a subset of fans, but would not receive nearly the same depths of hatred, if she was instead written as a thin blond boy like Tobias.

What fans are responding to: Cassie makes a handful of decisions over the course of the series that have negative consequences, or the potential for negative consequences, for one or more of her friends.  She trusts Aftran, when doing so has the potential to get all of her friends killed or infested (#19).  She trusts Aftran again, even though she puts Ax’s life at risk to do so (#29).  She lets Tom’s yeerk take the morphing cube with the goal of sowing chaos in the Yeerk Empire, even though that also temporarily grants the yeerks a huge military advantage (#50).

That said, it’s not as though any of these decisions goes unremarked-upon.  All of Cassie’s friends express anger and hurt after she lets the yeerks take the morphing cube, and it permanently ends her relationship with Jake (#51 - #54).  Marco makes several mean comments to Cassie during and after the Aftran incident (#19 - #20), and Cassie herself mentions that she still doesn’t know if she made the right choice years later (#44) in spite of it mostly having worked out in the end.

That said that said, Cassie occasionally verges on having too much plot savvy.  I’d like #50 to do more to set up her decision to let the yeerks have the morphing cube, because it coming as a twist also means we don’t get to see her reasoning in advance and don’t ever really know why she’s able to figure out that it’ll help bring the Yeerk Empire down.  I think #19 gets a similar response because of people’s perception that it worked out fairly well for Cassie, but it could have gone so badly if trusting Aftran hadn’t been a good idea.  There’s also a not-entirely-wrong perception that Cassie’s teammates are more likely to pay the price for Cassie’s questionable decisions, whereas Tobias’s questionable decisions are more likely to land badly on him (staying too long in morph) or on people to whom we are not personally attached (killing the mercora and nesk).  If people dearly love and wish to protect Marco, then some of Cassie’s decisions can feel like personal threats to a beloved fictional character.

That said that said that said, other characters make mistakes and make too-informed decisions.  To keep rolling with Tobias (who happens to be the fan favorite and therefore the easiest point of contrast), we get far greater willingness to forgive his “betraying” the team through supporting the hork-bajir over the Animorphs than we do Cassie’s “betraying” the team through not killing yeerks.  Tobias risks getting his entire team killed when he sabotages that bomb in MM2, and (like Cassie) he’s mostly protected by Plot Armor even though (like Cassie) his team has every right to be pissed at him.  Tobias accumulates “overly special” traits at an even faster rate than Cassie — she’s temporally grounded, he’s the hork-bajir messiah, she’s an estreen, he’s the only morph-capable nothlit in existence, she’s a yeerk ambassador, he’s the only andalite-human hybrid, she’s... good with animals, he’s a living time paradox who helped bring this world into existence, so on and so forth.  Cassie gets hate for being the only one able to control termite morph; Tobias gets admiration for being the only one able to control taxxon morph.  Yadda yadda.

So there’s criticizing characters, there’s My Fave Is Problematic, and then there’s “[this character] should be lined up against a wall and shot.”  And I think Cassie being a fat Black anti-racist feminist girl who breaks a lot of molds about how a sci-fi protagonist is “supposed” to act probably plays a role in the criticism so often going too far.

[lit-in-thy-heart]

you know what, what's the point of being on this platform if you don't get to bellow into the void about your interests in the hope of finding someone with the same interest?

in light of this, let me inflict a lowdown of the victorian literature (mostly novels because poetry is difficult to collate) that i've read for my module this year upon my mutuals

i'll do a separate one for vampire novels and reblog with the link

because what are the victorians without vampires? straight

bleak house (dickens): what a ride that was! yes, it was nearly a thousand pages and, yes, some chapters i was like can we move on please, but that's dickens for you. honestly, i loved it. if you're looking for thinly-veiled lesbianism, this is the book for you (esda all the way, if they even have a ship name). unfortunately i already knew one of the plot twists due to watching dickensian five years before, but there are plenty more to go around! if you can get through the first chapter describing nothing but fog and the law courts, you're in for one hell of a treat -- just don't google anything about it until you've finished because you will get spoiled (or don't share a house with me, where i'll tell you the entire plot as i'm reading it). definitely recommend, but marking it down for the heteronormativity with allan. (9.5/10)

villette (c. brontë): where to fucking start. i, quite frankly, do not care for charlotte brontë, and when reading the earlier novel agnes grey by anne, i could see some more things that charlotte has filched for this travesty. no victorian novel is going to be without problems, but this one was xenophobic, ableist and, of course, racist. the protagonist doesn't really give anything away, which is meant to make her more mysterious, but it just renders her an empty vessel. oh, and she tells you stuff that she's figured out waaaaaay after she says she's figured it out, a bit like she's allowing you to feel smart for making a connection before going 'oh yeah i knew that like twelve chapters ago, keep up'. some of the passages are really striking and there's maybe one character who's likeable but that's about it. i'd say it's more a story of omission than repression tbh. (4/10)

janet's repentance (eliot): wait, have i even finished this? no, no, i have not. it's fine, i wasn't going to tell you the ending anyway. i did get hooked eventually, there were just a LOT of names thrown around in the first few chapters, and a word that i didn't know was used frequently (turns out it was a name for the followers of this guy). i did get strong hester prynne/arthur dimmesdale vibes from some of the main characters, but janet is a very sympathetic character which, after reading villette, was nice. slightly depressing in some places, but a good enough read if you're not cramming it in the day before your tutorial, because it is mildly dense. (7/10)

the wonderful adventures of mrs seacole in many lands (seacole): not what i'd been expecting to read on my module, what with it being a biography, but enjoyable nonetheless. horrible histories lied to me, though, she was in her 40s/50s when she treated people in the crimean war, not in her 20s, but that's minor. it was actually quite funny??? like she was very reluctant to give away to give away her age and almost slipped up a couple of times, and also made some very biting remarks about people who were passing comment on her skin colour. for a biography, it wasn't hugely biographical, in that she was married for what seemed all of five minutes before her husband died, when in fact they were married for several years, but if you want an in-depth depiction of war, this is for you. not what i'd usually read, but some of the descriptions are so vivid that it does read like a novel in places, though sometimes the descriptions were so detailed that i did tune out at odd intervals. (9/10)

the happy prince and other stories (wilde): if you're feeling low, don't read these. don't. especially not 'the nightingale and the rose', because that was honestly heartbreaking. really well-written, some passages were just beautiful, i just wasn't in the right headspace to fully appreciate it. it also has a lot of death, i should probably explicitly say that. (8/10)

agnes grey (a. brontë): chef's kiss, honestly. if i'd read this last year then i think it definitely would have hit a lot harder, what with agnes moving away from home for the first time and struggling with loneliness around people who she is different from. beautifully written, i'm irritated at myself for not reading it sooner, even though i've owned a copy for about four years or so. agnes does come across as a bit wet sometimes, but those moments are rare and far between, she's overall a resilient character who is trying to make her own way in the world. seeing as i managed to get through the whole thing and didn't lose focus on what i was reading, i rate it higher than jane eyre (which is a rip-off of this anyway). we stan anne. though i am marking it down for the underdeveloped romantic relationship that just pops up (9.5/10)

now for some old classics that weren't taught on my module, but i can't not mention them

a tale of two cities (dickens): this was my first dickens book and oh my word what a book. yeah, okay, lucie is a bit of a wet dishcloth and has basically no personality, but there is definitely something there between her and her maid. sydney is my baby and oh so gorgeously dramatic ("you have kindled me, heap of ashes that i am, into fire"), which was perfect for the pangs of unrequited love. the plot is slightly confusing, and you don't really understand everything until right near the end, but i loved finding parallels in the chapters set in france with the chapters set in britain. oh and the showdown between miss pross and madame defarge is wonderful. i had a tradition of reading it on the run-up to christmas, just because that was the period when i read it for the first time, but i haven't done that for the past two years just because of exams and stuff. now, bleak house just pips it at the post, but i still love it dearly. (9/10)

wuthering heights (e. brontë): i couldn't review victorian literature and not include this. there are very strong similarities between this and villette (seems charlotte really drew on her sisters' work), particularly in terms of me not liking a single one of the characters except hareton. everyone is called cathy. literally. and heathcliff/cathy one is a toxic ship that should not be boarded. it is obsession, not love. the second volume is basically a repeat of the first one, thus showing that humanity will never move past its vices and will be caught in a vicious cycle of self-destruction for the rest of time. again, though, beautifully and vividly written. the characters are the type that you love to hate. (8/10)

the tenant of wildfell hall (a. brontë): what. a. book. this was a book that was simultaneously loved and condemned as scandalous when it came out. there's mystery, there's a woman escaping a horrible situation and making her own living, and there's a well-developed relationship! and the characters are likeable (i love rose, she's great, completely goes off at her brother when she has to do things for him all the time), which always puts it onto a winner. there's one chapter with gilbert that i have to skip just because i hate what he does in it. there are quite a lot of religious references, with redemption playing a huge part in the novel, but even the religious views brontë expresses went against a lot of the teachings of the anglican church at the time. do i even need to say that it's beautifully written if it's anne? marking it down for gilbert's behaviour and arguable control of helen's narrative. (9.5/10)

far from the madding crowd (hardy): i love this book. a little more uplifting than tess but still with the drama and murder you'd expect from hardy. maybe my review is influenced by my tiny crush on bathsheba: she's not the best role model but damn what a woman. gabriel isn't quite bae but i love him all the same, i'm so glad he's happy in the end. (9/10)