#but I dunno if I should tell the story in order or just sprinkle in some parts here and there

[delicioustarong]

They feared for their lives as they hear the screams of another.

Arc I : Betrayal

Post- Movie 1

Click for better quality, my notes about this art is under the cut 👇

Finally got to show you all art about Arc 1! YAY!! This Au has 3 Arcs in total, the first one is Post Movie 1, the second one is basically a retelling of Movie 1 but with a twist, and the last arc is a combination of the second and third movie :3

I have mixed feelings about this art cause I think everything blends together but at the same time not?? It's not really my favorite (._.). I do like the concept of it though, I really want to capture the fear and I don't really think I did that well...so meh-- I might redraw this next time. Idk maybe 👀. Hope you all like it!

For context on what is happening, check this post!

Here's the sketch version:

[rosiehunterwolf]

stuck with you (through bright and blue)

Prompts: Protective

Word Count: 4,400

Characters: The squad

Timeline: Pre-movie movie!verse

Trigger Warnings: Manipulation, Toxic Friendship

Summary: Kai only wants two things: to protect Lloyd, and to give him the best birthday ever. Unfortunately, Lloyd seems hell-bent on making that as difficult as possible. Kai’s always prided himself on achieving the impossible, but dealing with human emotions is much more complicated than beating up Garmadon’s generals or shooting enemies with fire, as he quickly learns. Movie!verse

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Read on Ao3

Tumblr work under the cut

“Woah, it looks like a massacre in here.”

At the sound of Cole’s voice, Kai, Jay, Lloyd, and Zane looked up from the map they had sprawled out across the table. Red pen was everywhere, circling different buildings and connecting them with lines.

“We’re having trouble finding a venue for Lloyd’s party,” Zane explained.

Nya rolled her eyes. “It’s not that hard! Just pick somewhere!” She held a hand out, shaking her phone. “We have five days until his birthday. Most places require at least that many to book a reservation. If we don’t decide today, we’ll have nowhere to go.”

“We can’t just pick anywhere,” Kai insisted. “It has to be perfect!”

“Why don’t we just go to the arcade?”

“It’s always so busy there.”

“It’s a Wednesday night! How many people are going to be there?”

“Trust me,” Jay said, “It’s still busy. It always is.”

Cole peered at the map. “Why’d you cross off the movie theater? Isn’t there a new Starfarer movie Lloyd’s been wanting to see?”

Kai shook his head. “Tickets sold out in like five hours. By the time school was over and we got over there, they were all gone.”

Jay frowned, running his fingers along one of the major streets. “What’s your favorite restaurant, Lloyd?”

“A restaurant? Are you serious?” Cole laughed. “We’d get kicked out in ten minutes.”

“Why can’t we just do it at my place?” Lloyd murmured. “I don’t need anything big deal.”

Kai frowned. “Your apartment isn’t that big, Lloyd. And I don’t want to bother your mom with all the decorations and stuff.”

Lloyd shrugged, looking down. “It doesn’t need to be big.”

“If you really want something simple,” Nya said, “why don’t we just do it at the warehouse? It’ll just be us, but there’s lots of space.”

Zane nodded. “That space would suffice. We would just have to ask Master Wu.”

“That is, if you’re certain that’s what you want.” Nya looked at Lloyd closely. “You sure you don’t want to do anything else?”

Lloyd nodded.

“Positive, bud?” Kai pushed. “Because it’s your birthday. We don’t mind at all.”

“I’m fine,” Lloyd insisted, getting to his feet. “It’s just another day on the calendar. Don’t make such a big fuss.”

The ninja fell silent.

“Lloyd,” Nya murmured, “it is a big deal to us.”

“Sorry. I’m just tired. And I’ve got homework. I should go.”

“Lloyd, wait-”

The green ninja pulled away from Kai’s outstretched hand. “I’m fine, Kai. I just have to go. Call me if you need anything.”

---

When they went back to school on Monday, their teachers loaded them with assignments, and Kai didn’t have a spare minute to talk to Lloyd in their shared classes. He couldn’t even talk at lunch because Lloyd had to make up a test. He kept his eyes peeled for his friend every time he was in the hallways, but if there was one thing Lloyd was good at, it was not being seen.

At the end of the school day, Nya texted him to meet up near their lockers. He got there and found her huddled around her locker with Cole, Jay, and Zane.

Kai walked over to them. “What’s going on? Where’s Lloyd?”

“He said he’d catch up with us later, which is why now is the perfect time for party preparation,” Jay said, gesturing towards Nya, who had a fiercely determined look on her face and was tightly clutching a clipboard. “Apparently she’s been waiting her whole life for this.”

“Alright.” Nya looked up from her clipboard. “I’ve already got streamers and gift wrap at home. What about you guys?”

“I’ve got a banner ordered with his name on it,” Cole said. “And of course, the shark tablecloths-”

Jay blinked. “Sharks?”

“Yeah. He loves sharks.”

“No, no, no, you’ve got it all wrong! We’re getting the dragon ones! He loves dragons!”

“Well, yeah, duh, but he’d obviously like the shark one better.”

“Are you kidding? Sharks would remind him of his dad’s mechs!” “Yeah, well, dragons remind him of his mech, which also reminds him of fighting his dad.”

“Totally not the same, plus dragons are way cooler-”

“Okay, we’re going with the Starfarer ones, then,” Nya grumbled. “What about balloons? Who’s covering-”

“I have balloons,” Zane interrupted. “Two hundred and seventy-five of them.”

They gawked at him.

“Zane… why do you have so many balloons just lying around?” Jay asked.

“They are new! In the package! I can blow them up for Lloyd’s birthday party-”

“Shhhhh!” Four pairs of hands immediately pushed over his mouth, silencing him, even though they were the only ones in the very empty hallway.

“No one can find out,” Cole insisted. “This is Lloyd’s special day. We’re not about to let anyone ruin it.”

“Okay, so Zane’s got the balloons.” Nya ticked another item off the list. “What about the cake? I have most of the ingredients to make one at home, but I’m completely lacking the baking skills.”

Cole nodded. “I can bake a cake. What’s his favorite kind?”

“Lloyd likes that Funfetti one,” Kai murmured.

Cole’s nose wrinkled. “I’m not baking a box mix. I can get him the rainbow sprinkles, though, and make a homemade one.”

“Okay, sounds good. Jay, could you pick up some confetti before his birthday? And Zane, we need some fun paper plates.”

“Zane, you should get shark ones.”

“No, dragons!” “Zane will pick out whichever plates he likes,” Nya snapped.

“What about gifts?” Jay asked. “What are you guys getting?”

“I’m not telling you,” Nya yelped. “I have the best gift ever and I don’t want you stealing any ideas.”

“I’ve been setting aside pieces of my allowance for a month,” Cole grinned. “It’s gonna be sweet.”

Jay blinked at him expectantly, and Cole smirked. “I’m not telling you, either, blabbermouth.”

“Blabbermouth?” he yelped. “I can keep secrets perfectly fine, thank you.”

“Oh yeah? What about that time you nearly gave away all of our ninja identities?”

“Or-” Zane added, “when he and Lloyd were working on those surprise mech upgrades and he accidentally said something in front of Kai and Nya?”

“Oh, remember when he spoiled the finale of Cole’s favorite show?” Nya grinned. “Cole was pissed.”

“Okay, okay, so there were a few times,” Jay spluttered. “But those were a while ago! I have many more secrets that I have kept than I haven’t.”

Cole crossed his arms, smirking. “Name one.”

“Well, there was that one time, where I- hey!” He stopped, glaring at Cole. “You’re trying to trick me into telling you a secret!”

“And it very nearly worked. So no. You can’t know.”

Nya shrugged. “Sorry, Jay. He’s right. When you have a secret, you get nervous. And when you’re nervous, you talk. A lot. It would only be a matter of time before you spilled everything to Lloyd.”

“Fine,” Jay muttered. “Keep your secrets.”

Kai jumped slightly as Nya elbowed him, and she frowned. “You okay? You’ve been really quiet.”

Kai shrugged, stuffing his hands in his pockets. “Is it just me, or… did Lloyd seem like he doesn’t really want a birthday party?”

The others went quiet.

“We’re not going to not give him a party,” Nya insisted. “You know how he gets. He never wants anyone to make a fuss.” Her brow furrowed. “It’s like he still can’t get it into his skull that we care about him.”

“I mean, of course I want to, it’s just… we can’t force him to do anything he doesn’t want.” Kai bit his lip. “It’s been a rough past few months for him. I just want him to be happy.”

“We all do,” Cole agreed. “Lloyd deserves a night just about him, for once.”

Zane frowned. “But how are we supposed to give him the party that he wants if he won’t tell us what he wants?”

“Let me try to talk to him,” Kai said. “He might open up more if it’s just one of us there.”

---

Lloyd, in fact, did not want to talk.

He was more open during their classes the next day, and held casual conversation with him, but forcefully avoided the topic of his birthday whenever Kai brought it up.

He huffed with frustration. What kind of kid didn’t want to celebrate their birthday? He wished Lloyd would just tell him what was going on.

He wasn’t going to, though, so naturally, the next best thing was to follow him.

He wouldn’t call it spying- just finding another way of obtaining information when Lloyd refused to give it himself. Besides, he was doing this to help Lloyd, not to hurt him.

Kai jerked himself out of his thoughts as Lloyd nearly slipped from his view. He gritted his teeth, refocusing on him. Lloyd wasn’t an easy person to follow, either.

When he finally caught up to him, keeping a reasonable distance, of course, Lloyd was hovering near his locker. An unfamiliar, dark-haired kid was leaning against it, laughing at something as Lloyd smiled uneasily. Kai edged closer, his frown deepening.

“Where’s the spike head? And the rest of your gang?”

“Kai?” Lloyd shifted. “I dunno. He probably had homework and stuff to do.”

The guy shrugged. “I kind of found him annoying, anyway. You realize no one could ever get to you when your friends were around, right?”

“I guess that’s… kind of the point.”

“You can’t spend your whole life letting them protect you. If you block out any person who hurts you, you block out anyone who could potentially be a friend, too.” The guy smiled in a way that made Kai wanted to chuck himself between Lloyd and the guy.

“That’s… that’s the thing. No one wants to be nice to me.”

“Spare me the sob story,” the guy rolled his eyes. “I know your dad sucks, but at least you have one.”

Lloyd flinched. “Sorry.”

The guy laughed, putting a hand on his shoulder and shoving him. “Stop being so jumpy, will ya? No wonder kids pick on you, you’re as harmless as a flea.”

“What am I supposed to do?” Lloyd blinked. “I can’t hit them back, or I’ll be in more trouble than I already am.”

“You don’t need to hit them, just show them you’re not a total coward! Maybe if you actually listen to them instead of cringing away, things might change.”

“Listen to them? Are you saying they’re right?”

“What does it matter if they’re right? Look, Lloyd, you’ve already got it hard enough as it is, and you’re making everything more difficult. You’d be so much cooler if you actually hung out with important people and not the outcast-losers you’ve stationed yourself with.”

For the first time since the conversation had started, Lloyd appeared indignant. “They’re not- I mean, you’re not-”

The guy laughed. “See? You can’t even get a word out. You’re so pathetic. You don’t even need the fact that you’re Garmadon’s son to get picked on, you already got it all set up for the torment-”

Kai wasn’t aware of himself pushing forward, he just was, and suddenly he was gripping the guy by the collar of his shirt, a pair of wide, brown eyes staring fearfully up into his.

“Who do you think you are and what the hell are you doing?”

“I… um, I…” the guy swallowed, his throat running dry.

“You treating my best friend like a piece of shit?” Kai shook him. “Are you?”

“I’m sorry!” The guy squirmed. “I didn’t really mean it, we were just joking around, he says that kind of stuff to me all the time!”

“Really? Lloyd. Says that. You sure we’re talking about the same person? Because I do not take nicely to liars.”

The guy squirmed harder. “Okay, okay, I’m sorry! Just please let me go, I’ll never bother you again!” Kai shot him the fiercest glare he could muster. “You better not.” He stepped back, dropping the kid, and he took off like a bullet.

Turning back to Lloyd, he saw his friend was staring at the fleeing boy with wide, disbelieving eyes, but it quickly dissipated to anger as he turned to Kai. “What the heck did you do that for?”

Kai’s eyes widened. “I was protecting you? From a bully?” Lloyd’s eyes flashed, and Kai actually took a step back. “I don’t need you to protect me! I can fight my own battles!”

Before Kai could even say anything, Lloyd was storming down the hallway and disappearing around the corner.

Kai just stood there for a moment, in shock. What was that all about? Hadn’t he done the same thing for Lloyd a dozen times? Why would defending him ever be bad?

A buzz in his pocket interrupted his thoughts. Kai pulled out his phone to see a new message in the chat from his sister.

irondragonfangirl: how r things going with lloyd

MasterofFiyaaaaa: honestly? i think i made it worse

irondragonfangirl: well u better find a way to fix it soon because his bday’s TOMORROW

MasterofFiyaaaaa: yeah i’ll find a way through to him

MasterofFiyaaaaa: i just hope he listens

irondragonfangirl: don’t worry

irondragonfangirl: he will

irondragonfangirl: just make sure u remember to listen to him too

irondragonfangirl: i have a feeling we haven’t been doing that enough

irondragonfangirl: i feel terrible

MasterofFiyaaaaa: yeah me too

MasterofFiyaaaaa: we’ll make it up to him though

MasterofFiyaaaaa: right?

irondragonfangirl: sure as long as cole doesn’t burn this cake

irondragonfangirl: seriously y did we let him bake it

irondragonfangirl: if i dont respond in the next hour just assume his house burnt down and im dead

MasterofFiyaaaaa: can i have your motorcycle if you die

irondragonfangirl: shut up

---

Kai spent an hour looking for Lloyd after their confrontation, but he couldn’t find him anywhere, and Lloyd, unsurprisingly, hadn’t answered any of the twenty-some texts Kai had sent him, either. Eventually, he had to give up looking for him and resigned to speaking to him at school tomorrow.

His birthday.

In the first class they had together, Lloyd avoided looking at him, and Kai felt an ache in his chest. Today was his birthday. He knew things weren’t going to turn out like he had imagined, but he wanted them to at least be better than this.

Swallowing back his nerves, Kai walked over to him, where he was doodling something in his notebook.

Kai cleared his throat. “Um. Lloyd?”

Lloyd looked up, an expression flashing across his face that Kai couldn’t read, but he didn’t immediately leave or turn away from him, which Kai took as a good sign.

“Happy birthday, dude.”

Lloyd smiled tentatively back. “Thanks.”

Things didn’t go immediately back to normal after that- there was still a tension between them, and Lloyd wasn’t saying much more than a couple sentences at a time, firmly avoiding the topic of the previous day- but at least it was back to a level where Kai didn’t feel absolutely horrible for ruining his day. Lunch, at least, got a smile out of him- as well as a bunch of embarrassed blushing as Nya stabbed a candle into his brownie (they couldn’t actually light it, lighters weren’t allowed on campus) and they insisted on singing to him so off-key that Cole looked like he wanted to punch them.

When the last bell finally rang, Kai headed over to Lloyd’s locker, hoping they could talk now that there weren’t other kids around, but he wasn’t there.

Kai relented, pulling out his phone.

MasterofFiyaaaaa: Lloyd? i know youre upset but can we plz talk?

He held his breath, staring at the screen intensely, as if that would make Lloyd respond.

While he was waiting, a message from a group chat popped up.

irondragonfangirl: what’s taking so long jay, we need those decorations

jaybird123: eta 5 mins

jaybird123: i literally just left class how’d you get there so fast

jaybird123: wait you didn’t use the tunnels did you

irondragonfangirl: no me and cole are bringing the CAKE remember?

irondragonfangirl: im not taking that through the tunnel

irondragonfangirl: we didnt spend 3 hrs on that for it to get squished

irondragonfangirl: i told the nurse i wasn’t feeling well so i could go home early

irondragonfangirl: why didnt YOU take them

jaybird123: i couldn’t exactly discreetly smuggle all these decorations into my locker

jaybird123: mmm cake. is it good?

irondragonfangirl: don’t even THINK about it, that’s not until Lloyd gets here

jaybird123: but im hungryyyy

jaybird123: do i need to pick up anything for dinner?

rock’n’cole: nah it’s cool, we just found out lloyd’s favorite chinese restaurant, the Bamboo Dragon, delivers so we’re gonna order from there

jaybird123: my mouth is watering already

ZaneJulien:0xD;): Jay, you shouldn’t text while driving.

jaybird123: tell nya to get off my case then!

irondragonfangirl: exCUSE me zane you are supposed to be putting up those balloons right now why are YOU on your phone

ZaneJulien:0xD;): Why are you texting me? We are in the same room.

irondragonfangirl: why are YOU texting ME

rock’n’cole: would you guys just stop being dumb and come help me

irondragonfangirl: great now you got cole in on it too

rock’n’cole: would you two just GET OFF YOUR PHONES

Kai was interrupted from whatever turn the conversation was going to take next when he finally got another notification.

thegreendragon: ok. you know where i’ll be

Kai blinked, turning towards the doors and pushing through them, walking out onto the school lawn. The main feature was the football stadium, although there were other things as well- large trees, garden patches for the science classes, picnic tables for eating lunch outside, if the weather permitted. And- although the students were too old for recess, now- there was still a small swing set- a simple, rusty thing, with only two swings, but it served its purpose. Sitting on one of them, gently rocking, was Lloyd.

Kai made his way over, sitting down beside him in the other swing.

“So, uh… can we talk? About yesterday?”

Lloyd nodded, and Kai titled his head at him, trying to gauge his thoughts. “Who was that kid?”

Lloyd breathed out slowly. “His name is Brad. He was my best- and only- friend in elementary school, but we were separated when I moved away. Brad’s family just recently moved to Ninjago City, and I… I was hoping to reconnect with him.”

Kai ignored the twinge of jealousy at the words “best friends.” Lloyd was allowed to have other people than him in his life, and things had obviously changed since then, anyway.

“I’m sorry, Lloyd. I didn’t mean to interrupt anything, but from what I saw… Brad was being a jerk to you.”

Lloyd shifted uncomfortably. “Yeah, I… he’s changed since we were kids. The efforts at rekindling our friendship honestly aren’t going so well. That’s… that’s why I was in a bad mood. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have taken it out on you. You were only trying to do something nice for me.” “Don’t worry about me. But this Brad kid… anyone who treats you like that doesn’t deserve to be your friend.”

“I know, I just…” Lloyd sighed, running his fingers through his hair. “I was so eager to make a friend other than you guys…” His eyes widened as he processed his own words. “Not there’s anything wrong with you guys, it’s just- I just wanted to actually earn someone who wasn’t friends with me because of a shared occupation.”

Kai elbowed him. “Hey. This whole ninja thing may be what got us introduced to each other, but we’re not friends with you because you’re one of the ninja. We’re your friends because we love you as a person. As Lloyd, not the green ninja.”

Lloyd sniffed, giving him a soft smile. “Thanks, Kai. I’m glad I have you to protect me.”

“You don’t need protection, but you’re stuck with me as a best friend, so you’re going to get it, anyway.”

Lloyd laughed. “I wouldn’t have it any other way.”

His phone buzzed, and he quickly checked it.

irondragonfangirl: the party’s all set up, now the only thing missing is lloyd. did you get to talk to him?

MasterofFiyaaaaa: yeah, we’re cool now. on our way

Kai turned back to Lloyd. “C’mon, green machine. Let’s go enjoy your birthday.”

Lloyd blinked at him. “Huh?”

“Your party, remember? The one Nya and the guys have spent the whole week planning? Or is there some other celebration I don’t know about?”

Lloyd shook his head. “No, no, it’s just- I thought I messed it all up.”

“Don’t worry, we got it under control.”

“Really?”

“This is our teammates you’re talking about! Stubborn as mules. They’re not giving up on you that easily.”

“I… thank you. Thank you guys.”

“You can tell them yourself. We’re going to this party, and we’re going to have fun!”

---

Kai had to admit, he was impressed with what the others had been able to pull off in such a short amount of time.

It was nothing huge or extravagant, but it was a nice little party, and Lloyd seemed to like it better like that, anyway.

They were barely through the doors of the warehouse when Jay was launching himself into Lloyd’s arms, pulling him into a tight hug, the others close behind.

“Happy birthday!” they cheered.

Lloyd hugged them back, laughing. “Thanks, guys, I didn’t- I didn’t expect all this!”

“Are you kidding?” Nya put her hands on her hips, grinning. “We’re pulling out all the stops for our baby bro.”

Lloyd’s smile briefly flickered to a scowl. “I’m not a baby.”

“To us, you always will be,” Kai said, slinging an arm around his shoulders and ruffling his hair. Lloyd squirmed away, although he was unable to hide the grin on his face.

“Wow, this place really looks different.” Lloyd gazed around at the warehouse with wide eyes. They had pushed aside training equipment to make room for tables and chairs, and green and gold streamers decorated the walls, adorned by multicolored balloons. Someone had plugged a gaming console into the TV, as well as a DVD player next to a box of DVDs- which must’ve been Jay’s, he was the only person Kai knew, apart from Master Wu, who even had DVDs anymore- because Kai still hadn’t been able to convince Master Wu to buy them Netflix on the warehouse’s TV, getting the TV there in the first place had been hard enough as it was. On the far end was a buffet table, filled with rice, chicken, dumplings, and other Chinese staples from the Bamboo Dragon- as well as a beautiful, heavily frosted cake in the center of it all. It was decorated with rainbow sprinkles, making it completely and uniquely Lloyd.

Lloyd’s eyes were on the cake too, his eyes wide. “Cole! It looks amazing! I never knew you were so good at making cakes!”

Cole shrugged, trying to hide his smile. “I’ve had some experience.”

“Hey! What makes you think Cole made it?” Nya sniffed.

Cole blinked. “I did.”

“Well, I helped.”

Cole snorted. “Don’t know if you could call it that. From my point of view, it seems like I was doing most of the work while you were busy texting your boo.”

Both Nya and Jay turned scarlet.

“I was not,” Nya spluttered. “I was making preparations for Lloyd’s party!” “Yeah, yeah, whatever you have to tell yourself.”

“Let’s not jump to conclusions too hastily,” Jay said, turning to walk over to the cake. “The true judge of quality will be how good it tastes.”

Nya stuck an arm in front of him. “Not so fast, mister! Dinner first.”

After laughing, playing games, and eating, they insisted on opening presents. Lloyd was all smiles and gratitude with each one, which ended up sparking a debate between the others about whose gift he liked best.

“He totally loved my gift!” “Nuh-uh! Did you see the way he smiled a little differently on mine?”

“Jay, you literally gave him a book. Why would he be excited about that?”

“Not just any book! A first edition Starfarer collector’s comic from when my parents were kids, and in mint condition, too!”

“Why would you want some dusty old comic when you could have the newest Starfarer video game?” Kai argued. “It took forever for me to find one of these, they were sold out everywhere.”

“Starfarer this, Starfarer that,” Cole sighed. “I don’t understand how he could possibly need any more Starfarer things. The record I engraved for him is way more personable and unique.”

“You guys are thinking about this all wrong! You should’ve gotten him a katana like me, something that he actually needs and uses.”

“Statistically, Lloyd spends more time drawing than any other hobby,” Zane said. “Which means my gift of an art book and new set of pencils is logically the best fit.”

“Clearly you guys all have it wrong in the head-”

“Guys, relax,” Lloyd laughed. “I loved all your gifts equally.”

“What is that supposed to mean?”

“Jay… it means exactly what you think it means.”

“You can’t even pick one gift?”

Lloyd shook his head. “No way. These are all amazing. Thank you, guys. Really.” His gaze met Kai’s for a long beat. “For everything.”

“Of course. But, just to make things clear, you did like mine the most, right? You’re just saying you liked them equally, so that you didn’t make the others feel bad?”

Lloyd smacked his forehead as the others burst into protest again, and Kai shot him a sharp-edged grin. “I can do this all night.”

Eventually, Lloyd got them to stop bickering- the mention of cake got them all quiet pretty quickly- and after divvying it up, they went over to the couch and played the video game Kai had gotten him. He quickly lost track of time, but time didn’t matter. Even if it meant they would be tired for school the next day, seeing Lloyd like this- half sprawled over his teammates, brow scrunched in concentration as he mashed buttons on his controller, hints of frosting on his lips as he tried and failed miserably to bite back his laughter- it was worth it. He looked happier than Kai had seen him in weeks.

For that, he could even contain himself from bragging about how Lloyd obviously liked his gift best.

[simpz-art-stash]

Late beginnings

Summary: Mac goes out for a drink, and happens upon some advice he takes into consideration about his skewered relationship with Wukong. Before finally taking some action to mend the long burnt bridge. (Author’s note: I barely did any beta reading for this so if it’s worded strangely that’s just how I write without the normal filter on. I’m country so HOWDY) Next Page ----------------------------------------------------------------------------- The night was late, but he didn’t care, he might as well have been nocturnal with the way his whole life revolved around the whole stereotype of shadows and shit. He’d walked into a bar he’d passed through a few times before, donning his human disguise of course beforehand, and walked in without sparing anyone else a glance. Before planting his rear in one of the stools seated at the front bar, ordering a drink to get the night started. “I’m really looking forward to seeing that new Monkey King movie with the trailer they just released. You saw it too right?? The whole style of the film is on par with their most recent game- OH, you think they’re gonna make a game of it?? I bet you they wiiiill!~” Ugh, great, just what he’d come here to avoid.

Mac’s eyes glanced to the blabbermouth boasting about whatever new movie was being made about his ex, to see two girls residing a ways down near the other end of the bar a few seats away from him. Both looking to have had a fair night themselves already if any of the cups and plates hanging around their spot was anything to go by. “Probably. I hope it’s better than last game that came out on the Brick 360, the bugs in that thing were gross to deal with.” Their friend commented back. Before looking down at their phone and claiming that it was getting late and that they had to go. “Yeah I’ll see ya Monday!” The chick waved their friend off a lazy farewell after they’d paid their bill before going back to their drink, now taking less tedious sips as the mood seemed to smooth out from their conversation prior. “I see someone’s a pretty big fan of that ol’ man.” Macaque piped up from where he sat, earning the attention of the stranger he’d directed his comment towards. “The Monkey King yeah?” Sparks danced in the chick’s eyes at the recognition of the name, before the stranger perked up and beamed a smile back at him, “You betcha! I’m a total nerd for that legend.” ‘A legend, hah.’ “S’the whole reason I moved to China in the first place.” She jabbed a thumb at her chest, “All the way from America!” Mac whistled, “That’s a pretty far leap to take, even for a legend. What, you hopin’ you’ll get the chance to see em’ or somethin’?” He sneered, taking his glass and lazily swirling it in his hand. “I wish!” She laughed, “Nah I mostly just moved here for work. If anything though it’s cuz a them for where I am now. I’d never even heard of him till about five years ago!” Mac blinked, lowering his drink from his lips, “You’re joking…”

“Not at all! No one hardly knows the story back home. Only reason I found out was cuz I just started gettin’ into anything monkey-related as a hobby.” She pointed at him, “Don’t laugh either, it’s a wildly popular standpoint to have these days online.” Mac quirked a brow at that, he’d hardly touched the internet these days save for whenever he needed some quick info on something he couldn’t find elsewhere. He held his hands up, “Hey I ain’t judging…” He smirked a little to betray the look that he totally was though. It was kinda funny how ironic it was him being there right then. She squinted at him, “Anyways...Yeah, I’d seen stuff of him online, but I’d never paid much attention to it up until recently.” “What made you change your mind?” Mac boredly probed, taking a sip. She simply shrugged, “I was in a dark headspace, guy made me laugh.” He paused, “Wait, seriously??” “I mean have you HEARD half the crazy shit he’s done??” ��Babe I’ve LIVED through half the shit he’s done.’ “Like, literally, the guy is HILARIOUS. My favorite story out of them all being one where he literally tricked THREE taoist immortals into drinking his own piss!!” She burst out laughing while Mac choked on his drink a little, not having expected to hear that of all things. Sure he’d heard a few of the shenanigan’s his peaches had gotten up to throughout his journey to the west but he’d never heard that one before. Nor had he the patience to read through all that mess of context that had been published either. “Ahhh man, it still gets me…” The chick sighed with a few leftover laughs as she wiped a tear from her eye. “What about you? What’s your favorite story?” She asked. And suddenly Mac felt like he’d been put on the spot as he stared back at her. “Come ooon, surely there’s one that’s gotten your gut rolling.” She pried. ‘Plenty, but there ain’t no way in hell I’d tell a soul.’ “Bahh...there ain’t the first one that comes to mind that I’d like. Honestly I’m not even much of a fan.” He waved his hand dismissively. “Whaaat?? Aw come on! There’s tons of cool n’ funny stories!” “Heh..can’t imagine what you find so charming about a guy who’s too good for his own friends.” Mac spitefully twacked himself mentally for spewing something so personal like that out. Ugh, and he hadn’t even finished half his drink yet… The chick sitting to his left seemed to tilt her head a little before she squinted at him. Her silence being what brought his attention from his drink to her as he blinked back with a quirked brow. “What?” “Your eyes, they’re like raging storm clouds.” She pointed out. He blinked, not really sure how to feel about that. The only one who’d ever really pointed that out to him before was… “...So?” “Nothing!...” She shrugged, turning back away towards her own drink as if no conversation at all had happened between them. Whatever...he had his fill of shit to drink to either way. The night might’ve been late but he was just getting started. “He makes me laugh though.” She pointed out, earning her a glance. “All his stories n’ stuff. If there was ever a man I’d want, it’d be one who could always make me laugh.” “Hmph, not one for strength?” He took a long sip. Ignoring the bitterness of others fawning over someone he’d come to love before he’d gotten so popular. “Strength is fine n’ all, but it can only take a relationship so far..you gotta have more pieces to put in that crockpot of a relationship if you wanna make it taste good. Stuff like patience, honesty, a little bit of everything to help it all come together to make it juuuuust right.” “Hm…” “It can’t be all just you putting the stuff in there either, it’s gotta be a contribution from both gardens. Otherwise you’ll just barren your lands and be left with nothing to spare yourself or others in your life with.” She glanced at Mac, “Relationships are tricky like that, but they should always be a 50/50 split~” She winked. That...actually sounded like pretty sound advice. Something he’d heard a little here and there before but never so simply laid out. Though it made sense from his standpoint, fairness n’ all that. But he’d been that way with Wukong before and it had never worked out, all the bickering and such, so what had gone wrong? “Can I...ask you something?” Mac inquired. “Shoot.” “What’re your thoughts on..a relationship that seemed fine, but then the other changed so much that everything about it fell apart?” “Mmm...care to sprinkle in a lil more context?” The chick eyed him. Mac’s face scrunched up a little, no idea why he was asking some random mortal for relationship advice of all things. “Hey man. We’re both probably never gonna meet again after tonight, so if you’ve got skeletons in your closet, your best place to let em’ out is here. Bartenders are known for being the most well kept secret keepers in all the world after all~” She winked at the bartender in question who simply looked the other way with a look that might’ve suggested such a fact as truth. “Hm…” Ah screw it, “Alright alright…” He sighed and put his drink down, “There’s..someone. We used to be real close, we were strong together but then uh..shit got real and he had to go deal with it. But when he came back he uh, wasn’t the same as before, an I might’ve sorta assumed he was cheating on me so…so we kinda fell out.” The chick nodded, “Ahh..the classic misunderstanding of change and cheating, a tale as old as time.” She seemed to hum a moment before she turned from where she was seated, if not to hop down off her stool and plop down on the one right up next to him. “Uh-” “Shhh, lemme see those eyes.” She squinted, leaning in and staring deep into his. It’d would’ve been really unnerving if she hadn’t said anything about them before, now he was a lil put off that he might’ve been asking a witch of all things for advice… “Right. Well, at least you feel bad about it. So there’s that.” He blinked and his brows furrowed, “Wh- of course I feel bad about it, it was his fault-” He suddenly had a finger pressed to his lips. “Nope! Nooononono, you do not get to throw all the blame elsewhere like that sweetheart. There ain’t no way in hell you’re gettin’ a second chance with them if you keep that up.” She pulled her hands back. His face scrunched up and he found himself crossing his arms, if he had his tail out it would’ve been irritably swaying behind him right then at just how annoyed he was getting at this weird lady and her words. “Oh yeah? An what do you think’s best then huh?” “I dunno if you’d be up for that kinda challenge…” She idly fiddled with an imaginative piece of lint off her sleeve, which only seemed to irritate Mac further at the thought of him not being able to handle Wukong of all people. Like sure he’d gotten his ass handed to him before but he could still hold his own! “Try me.” The chick glanced back at him with a smirk, which caught him off guard for a second before he shot her a glare back. “Alright, but it’s definitely not gonna be as quick or easygoing of a recovery as you might hope it’ll be. Nor is there even a chance of you recovering it in the first place. But, you at least got that spark enough to try so who am I to deny?” ‘Hmpt, dam right I got a spark.’

“First of all, no more blaming, if you’re gonna tackle this properly, you gotta do yourselves a favor an quit it with the blame placing. Sure it’s easy, but it ain’t gonna get you nowhere but back to square one. It’s all in the past, the now is now. So push forward to fix it and put it behind you two so you can focus on the more important things.” “Easier said than done…” “Hey man, even if they don’t follow the same ruleset at first you could always work things out to make it one later on. I’m just tellin’ ya right now so you won’t just go diggin’ yourself a deeper hole.” Honestly at this point he was pretty much six feet down under, death to him would’ve been a mercy right then. “Fine…” He rolled his eyes. “Next up, apologizing…” -----------~----------- “I thought I told you to stay off my island.” Mac didn’t really glance back from where he stood high up on one of the breathtaking ledges that which Flower Fruit Mountain bolstered. His arms crossed, eyes sternly held against the leftover warmth of the late afternoon sun as it shifted the skies hues from blue to blood red. Hopefully that would be the only tinge of red the Mountain would see after today. “I know.” “What, no witty remark? Give me one good reason-” “I just wanted to talk.” Mac stated plainly. “Why the hell should I give you the chance?” “...” Mac wasn’t sure if he could come up with a good enough reason after the shitshow he’d caused him the last few centuries, most recent being his spat with him between MK. “I’m sorry.” That seemed to catch the king off guard, as he paused in his vicious glare to stare at the other. “Excuse me??” “I’m.Sorry.” Mac turned finally to Wukong, that look of fiery malice having softened immensely upon meeting their eyes. “I was wrong for what I did and I’m sorry.” Wukong’s face looked like it had had a stroke with how frozen in place it was, almost like he couldn’t believe what he was hearing. “Hurting everyone around you just to get back at you, I was wrong for doing that. And I just wanted to apologize.” Mac’s face twisted a little, the words coming out a little rougher than he’d liked, but he’d managed to get three steps in so far… “If you think a few sorry’s are gonna be enough to make up for all that crap then you gotta nother’ thing comin Mac.” Wukong finally shook off the surprise and crossed his arms with a steely gaze. “Nah I know they ain’t worth shit with as long as it's been...which it’s been..a really, really long time come to think of it..nearly 3000 years…” Fucking yikes. “What’s your point?...” Wukong raised a brow at him. “My point is...my point..” What was his point? To make amends and hope they’d get back together? To go back to the way things were? That couldn’t be done with the way things were now. Wukong had a successor, a moral compass, a lotta shit that Mac didn’t. A lotta shit that he wanted but never could figure out how to get his own. His face scrunched up a little and he sighed, “I..just wanted to make things right.” “Oh-hoh? After so long you finally decided to admit you were at fault? Sorry Mac, but it’s waaaay too late for that.” Wukong huffed, “Honestly, this is probably just another one of your stupid tricks if anything. The old Macaque would never throw himself down like that.” “Well maybe I’ve changed!” Mac exclaimed suddenly, his temper flaring a bit as his eyes flashed lightning. “3000 years later? As if…” Wukong rolled his eyes and turned away, “You’ve still got that same look in your eyes you always do whenever we fight. Do me a favor and just keep away from the hot springs this time yeah? The last time you were here you sent a whole dam boulder over there and smashed half the pools.” He waved his hand dismissively. “And I happen to take my once a month bath’s very seriously.” Mac’s nostrils flared a little at just how flamboyant Wukong was acting towards him and his attempt to make amends. How he just saw his attempt as a joke and nothing more, it pissed him off. Wukong had changed and everyone had accepted him, well not everyone, but still, why couldn’t the same be for him? Had he really fooled himself into believing that there was a chance he and Wukong could be together again? His shoulders slumped a little. Of course, who was he kidding. A 3000 year old pit of grudges wasn’t about to just up and disappear at the wave of a white flag. This was Wukong, the same guy who still playfully pestered the gods and demons around him for past conflicts that had happened between them. -----------~----------- “But you can’t just go, ‘ooo I’m so sorry for what I did.’ Nah, you gotta follow the five steps.” The chick claimed. “Yeesh, this a learning course now?” Mac tilted his head to the side. “It is if you wanna make things right.” She claimed matter a factly. “The five steps have never failed me before and have worked wonders for any an all my relationships. Might not quite have the same range of effect you’re going for but it’ll at least be a good start.” “Heh, you got the guts to back up that case?” Mac sneered. “I will if you don’t manage to screw it up.” The chick pointed out. “The five steps go as follows.” - express sorrow (I’m sorry) - own guilt (I was wrong) - name specific wrongs (I did X) - name impact (I hurt you) “And finally...” -----------~----------- “What can I do to prove myself to you?” Macaque asked finally. “What can I do to at least make it to where we can..not fight anymore..and just talk?...” Wukong stood there for a long moment, his features unreadable as their silence was muffled by the wind bellowing between them both from being so high up. “You really are serious about this aren’t you?...” Wukong’s head shifted ever so slightly, but not enough to where Mac could get a reading on his emotions. “I’m tired of fighting and waiting and thinking that if enough time passes things’ll go back to the way they were...when they never will. Trying to hurt you isn’t gonna make the old you come back, no matter how many times you beat me down...It’ll never be the same.” Mac admitted finally. A quiet gust settled down between them, before Wukong seemed to let out a dry chuckle and shook his head. “Can’t believe it took me 3000 years to beat the sense into you.” He turned and looked back at the other, where he no longer held a look of seething hate, but more akin to that of the same tired look just as the one Mac wore. Mac felt a sliver of guilt wriggle its way into one of the cracks of his heart and he glanced away, pulling a hand back and scratching his head. “Yeah well...your kid hit me pretty hard last time, enough to knock it in place.” A small smile crept a little onto his face. “Hm~ He’s gettin’ pretty good at hittin’ stuff with that old stick.” Wukong’s eyes glinted a little at the appeal of how proud he was for MK having taken Mac out the way he did. A little over the top and flashy, just like him.” “He’s got a pretty strong master to thank for that…” Mac found himself yearning a little for that same glint to be reflected on his memory the same way as MK’s. Not that he couldn’t see himself holding the same appeal for MK the way Wukong did, kid was strong, just a lil desperate in some of the cracks that shaped his outline. Something Macaque found that was easy enough to take advantage of, and something Wukong held a blind eye to. “Hm.” Wukong’s reply pushed him out of those thoughts for the moment as they shared a brief look between one another. A glimmer of reconsideration flashing between the two before Wukong finally turned his head away to drink in the sunset before them. “One chance.” Mac felt his heart nearly stop at that answer. “I’ll give you one chance, but if you screw this up, don’t even think about showing your face to me again.” Wukong replied, “I mean it this time…” Mac swallowed a little and nodded. Anything, he’d be willing to do anything to gain back what little trust he could from Wukong. “Good...you can start making up for it by apologizing to MK.” Mac blinked and sputtered a little as Wukong turned away and began to make his way back down the mountain. A smile playing on his lips while Macaque groaned to the heavens about his next trial.

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #365

“i’m numb to the pleasure, but still feel the pain”

Are there palm trees where you live? No. Do you own any Hello Kitty stuff? If so, what? No. What’s your favorite flavor of ice pop? Blue raspberry. Do you like animal print? What’s your favorite print? Not really. I think animal "print" only really looks nice on, well, animals. Does your dad have any facial hair? Yes. What do you think of foot tattoos? They're not my favorite, but some look nice. I myself wanna get "11121" (a Silent Hill 4 reference) "carved" onto the top of my feet. Do you like bugs or do they scare you? Some do. I've gotten more into them though as my passion for tarantulas expanded to other inverts, like mantises. Ever seen the movie Chernobyl Diaries? If so, did you like it? If not, do you want to see it? I haven't, but I'd be willing to watch it. I find the whole Chernobyl incident to be extremely fascinating, so I'd probably like it. Did your senior class in high school have a class trip? Where did you go? Bitch I wish. :/ Do you have an instagram account? What’s your username? Yeah, two: brittanymphotography and eldritch_obscura. Do you like Gir from Invader Zim? I think he's cute. Do you or would you ever own a gun? Why or why not? No thanks. If I'm not mistaken, I can't legally obtain one anyway because of my suicidal history. I'm fine with having like, pepper spray and a bat handy by the bed, lol. If it was offered for free by a professional, would you get your hair dyed platinum blonde? For FREE? Fuck yeah I'd try it. What do you normally order at Dunkin Donuts? A chocolate frosted donut, and sometimes a plain/cake one. Do you watch football? Favorite teams? No. What about WWE? Favorite wrestler? That's an even bigger no. Funniest thing you’ve ever heard a teacher say? Okay so this is hard to actually explain and it be funny. I had this amazing, kinda charismatically awkward history teacher in high school, and when talking about some legal stuff I can't remember, she deadass quoted "Without Me" by Eminem ("if the FCC won't let me be...") like so casually and everyone fucking died, just from knowing her and her personality. It was just very unexpected. Do you wear a lot of makeup? What do you think of girls who do? No. Girls can wear however much makeup they please. Do you have a savings account? Are you good at saving money? No. I can't really answer the second question because of me never having a steady flow of money. Would you rather have a relationship or casual flings? Relationship, 100%. I would never have a casual fling. Do you know anyone that’s part Native American? Yes. Who was your favorite Spice Girl? I remember none of them. Have you ever tried to poison someone? Yikes, no. Have you ever saved anyone from a fire? No. Have you ever had a seizure? No. I've had sudden spasms, but never a full-on seizure. Have you ever had an out-of-body experience? No. Have you ever had a black eye? No. Have you ever had a tooth pulled? No. Have you ever had pneumonia? I have not. Have you ever had tubes put in your ears? Yes, as a baby. Have you ever been shot with an arrow or bullet? Thank god no. Have you ever had kidney stones? No. Have you even been bitten by an venomous animal? No. Have you ever thought about being in the military? Fuck no. I wouldn't qualify, anyway. Have you ever been sedated or put under anesthesia? Yeah. Have you ever used shrooms or any other hallucinogen? No. What upcoming event are you most looking forward to? I can barely believe my tat appointment is almost here lakjsd;ajwlej;rwe What was the last song you heard? I'm currently listening to Motionless In White's synthwave edit of "Voices" they just put out. I looooove it. What time did you wake up today? Maybe like, 5:20? Is there a vase in the room you’re in? No. Have you recently been insulted? Yes. Compared to someone else of your age and gender; do you feel that you have a lot to offer someone? N O P E How many days a week do you work? I'm unemployed. Is there ONE person you feel more connected to than others? Yes. What is your worst relationship quality? I obsess over the person probably leaving, so especially at the beginning, I'm paranoid and distrustful. I want to emphasize that I'm not the asshole that snoops through her partner's phone out of distrust, but still, the fear is just there. What was your most recent serious injury? A serious one? Man idk. I've had a lot or negligible and smaller ones, but a big one... *shrug* What were you most recently happy about? I was happy to see "synthwave" in this video title, haha. Are you a fan of cake? Oh yes. What is your favorite insect? Butterflies. Is your town beautiful? Ew, no. Do you prefer the city or the country? THE COUNTRY. Have you ever witnessed an eclipse? Lots of lunar eclipses. Do you wear lipstick often? No. You’re going on a date with someone you like. What would you like to do? Considering the pandemic, probably just like... grab fast food and sit and eat at a park. That'd be cute. You’re hanging out with your best friend. What would you like to do? It'd be nice to get back to Avatar: The Last Airbender while hanging out with Doris (her beardie that I adore), too. Have you ever written or considered writing a play? No. Who is considered the “black sheep” of your family? Why? Ha, me. To begin, I like all the "dark" stuff, I'm the unreligious one, the one with political beliefs unlike most of my family, I'm not doing what I should be... Why is your favorite movie your favorite movie? It's just a masterpiece. I love love love animals, African one especially, and I find it to be an amazing story of courage and dedication to family. Plus I shamelessly love all the songs, haha. What’s an odor you hate? GASOLINE. FUCK. What’s a sound you hate? Fingernails on a chalkboard. Or screech-y noises in general. If money was no issue, what would you like to do right now? I was initially gonna say go to Yellowstone, but fuck that hot weather this time of year. So, this brings us back to Venus' terrarium; I'd want to get a new one and better materials. What’s something you’re so good at that you take pride in your skill? I wouldn't say I'm "so good" at it, but I do take pride in my writing. What’s something you’d never ever dare to ask another person? Hm. Under ANY circumstance, I guess "are you pregnant?" There's almost like... no situation where I'd be comfortable asking somebody that. What’s the worst/best thing you’ve done without your parents knowing? We're not getting into that lmao. Do you know anyone who has a hearing deficit? No. What is one thing stopping you from becoming a veterinarian? I could never stand seeing so many hurt and dying animals and still be okay at the end of the day. Are there any opinions you used to have even a few years ago that you look back on and think, “I can’t believe I ever thought that way”? THERE ARE!!!!!!!!!!! A LOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!! The last time you cried, what was wrong? I fell and skinned my knees when stepping over this barrier Mom made to keep the damn dog out of the hallway and thus my room to fuck with the cat and eat his food. I previously twisted my ankle, fell backwards, and had one other accident with it despite moving stuff, and I didn't cry from pain, just massive frustration. I want this dog GONE. Do you like multi-choice tests or tests you have to write out? Multiple choice. Who last called you ‘beautiful’? Couldn't tell ya, bud. Have you ever caught a firefly? Yeah, I did that lots as a kid. Do you own any camouflage? No. What’s the stinkiest pet you’ve ever had? Uhhh I dunno. Have you ever been on the news? For what? No. Have you ever seen one of your friends get arrested? No. Do you put sprinkles on anything? No, I hate sprinkles. How do you like your steak? Medium well. Long hair on guys: yes or no? Yaaaaaaaas. Is there a basement in your house? If so, what is it used for? No. When was the last time you started a new medication? It's been a while. What is your favourite type of nut? Cashews, I think. Where did you eat the best pizza you’ve ever eaten in your life? I'm so fuckin basic, like my genuine answer is Domino's lmaooo. Did you ever watch The Rugrats when you were a kid? Yeah, I loved that show. I even had the two video games; I was obsessed with the first one in particular. Do you know anyone who was adopted? Yes. Do your parents’ professions match their college degrees? No. Do you write shopping lists on paper or just remember it in your head? I don't do the shopping, so. But I would definitely need to write it down. Have you ever used a lawnmower? No. Have you ever consumed so much alcohol that you vomited? No. Can you tie balloons? No, actually. My hands are just too shaky. When was the last time you were at a pet store? A few weeks ago when we got rats for Venus. Ugh, it is SO overpriced; they come in a box of two, and as I feed her twice a month, it's honestly quite a bit of money. Like if I remember correctly, it's around $16. FOR TWO. SMALL. RATS. I've recommended we just buy them in bulk NOT from an overpriced chain pet store, but the problem with that is then we have *too* many, and the nutritional value of frozen rats apparently does degrade with time, so I don't want to feed my snake poor food. So it's just an annoying thing we have to do. Have you ever taken a pregnancy test? Not like, an at-home one. I've been tested before surgery, but that was just a safety protocol. Does your ex still think about you? "The" ex, probably not. Honestly, who is the last person to tell you that they love you? My mom. What is the last state you were in besides your own? Virginia. Would you go down to see the Titanic if given the chance? Man, that's kinda tempting. Maybe. It'd be super cool. Have you ever seen the Hollywood sign in real life? No. Did you ever see a scorpion in the wild? No, they don't live here. Do you type the proper way? Have you ever typed on a manual typewriter? Yes to both. What was your maternal grandmother’s first name? Cecelia. Name a word that people use locally that outsiders probably can’t pronounce. Conetoe. You said it wrong.

[daddystevee]

Crashing Down

(steve harrington x hopper!reader / billy hargrove x hopper!reader)

BLEHHHHHH I’m having a REALLY hard time writing this rn, just because I feel like the story isn’t really progressing that much. And like i'm just going over parts of the show that has actually happened.. But i'm gonna keep truckin through i guess. I think this chapter is gonna be pretty long because im gonna try to get through a lot. There’s not a whole lot of Billy or Steve in this chapter but more like sister bonding with the girls <3 I dunno feedback would be greatly appreciated!!! <3 Thanks to everyone that's been reading it and thanks to @harringtown​ whose been supporting me through this whole thing. I honestly don't think I would be able to do this without her. <3 so go check her stuff out shes my main source of inspiration- also she's just the BEST writer like ever! She’s totally tubular. ;)

catch up here

Warnings: Curse words? Angst? I dunno anymore man.

Part 4/?

Word count: 2.1k (a big boy)

Summery: Sometimes things just don’t go as planned and your world just come crashing down, but it’s a good thing that you have people in your life to be there to catch you when you fall.

So there you were sitting on the counter in the back room of Scoops watching Steve pace back and forth, trying to understand Russian and eating a banana. 

Dustin cut off the recorder and asks Steve what he thinks about it. 

“Sounds familiar.” Steve says finishing off his banana. 

“What?” both you and Dustin say at the same time

“The music, that music right there at the end.”

You sigh heavily and put your head in your hands,

“Steve, you’re such an idiot.”

The two boys start arguing about the fact that Steve should be paying attention to the words not the music when you butt in again.

“I can’t take this shit anymore,” you said looking back and forth between the two fighting boys, “I’m going home.”

You push yourself up and off of the counter and start to walk out the door when Robin burst through the door clearly fed up and aggravated.

“Alright, babysitting time is over. You need to get in there.”

She notices that her ‘You Suck’ board has been erased and looks at you as if you were the one to erase the board. You stick your hands up in surrender with wide eyes and looked back at Steve and Dustin.

“I guarantee you what we’re doing is way more important than your data.” Dustin said, looking to you for reassurance.

You just shrug your shoulders at him.

“Yeah? And how do you know these Russians are up to no good anyway?” Robin says.

You slowly start to back up towards the door with that question, “Yeah, I think I’m gonna go now..”

Once you make it out the door you let out a breath you didn’t know you were holding in. You hear Robin tell the guys that she’s fluent in 4 languages.

Dustin seems very impressed, “Russian?”

“Ou-yay are-yay umb-day” she says.

Both Steve and Dustin are extremely impressed by her fancy words, you pop your head back in the door before officially leaving to add a few words.

“It’s pig latin, for ‘you are dumb’, you dingus’ ”

They all turned their heads to look at you, Robin had a smirk on her face and sent you a wink while the boys had dumbfounded looks on their faces. And with your last few words, you left.

><

You walked out of the ice cream parlor and took a look around to see what you could do to pass some time.

After walking around, looking at a few stores you heard your name being called.

“Y/N!” Max screamed pulling El right behind her.

“Max! El? El, what are you doing here? You know you’re not supposed to be here right?” you asked Eleven, but looking at Max.

“SHE JUST- needed some girl time!” Max was quick to say, “The boys- they’re being real douchebags.”

You knew that all too well, especially with everything that’s been happening with Billy as of lately. 

“Yeah. We- wanted to go..” El turned her head to look at Max for reassurance. When max nodded her head, a smile creeped onto her face and she continued confidently, “shopping.”

You stood there with arms crossed looking at both of the younger girls. You remembered what it was like being their age, and you knew that the girls wanted to just have some harmless fun. So you smiled while rolling your eyes.

“Fine, BUT- only on one condition,” you started “you guys have to hang out with me.” 

The two girls both had giant smiles plastered on their faces. They looked at each other then looked back at you. They each took one of your hands and dragged you off to The Gap.

You and max both followed El around as she was looking around when she walked up to a display with a blue shirt with yellow, red and white lines on it. 

“Do you like that?” Max asks

“How do I know, what I like?” El responds

“You just try things on, until you find something that feels like you. Not Hopper, not Mike, Not Y/N,” she says as she points to you. You do a little spin showcasing your style, “you”

>cue shopping spree montage<

At the end of trying on lots, and lots of clothes El finally decides on two new outfits and a new romper. Max ends up with a new pair of sunglasses and you leave with a new hat and a few new shirts. 

You walk out of The Gap arm in arm with the two girls, giggling and smiling at each other like there is no one else in the world. The next thing you know, you’re being pulled into the Flash Studio.

You watch them dress up and take tons of pictures. Striking different poses and pretending to be someone else for the day. The even convinced you to take a couple of pictures with them. You truly were having the time of your life.

“How about some ice cream?” Max asks at the end of a fun filled day.

El looked at you with pleading puppy eyes begging you to say yes. She knew you wouldn’t say no to the puppy eyes.

You sighed and shook your head with a small smile on your face, “I don’t see why not.”

The three of you walk in to none other than Scoops Ahoy. You make your way up to the counter for the two girls to place an order. Right when Steve finishes making their cones and some other random cone Robin pulls open the divider,

“We’ve got our first sentence!”

“Really? Makin’ more progress than Harrington, huh?” you ask

“Can it Hopper” Steve says with a serious look on his face.

“The week is long” Robin says with a Russian accent.

“Well that’s thrilling.” Steve says sarcastically

“It’s progress!” she says before shutting the divider once again to continue her work.

Steve turns around holding three ice cream cones,

“Alright here ya go, you got a strawberry, and then a vanilla with sprinkles, extra whipped cream and a double scoop of peppermint stick.” he says handing the last cone to you.

The girls thank Steve but you just kind of look at him with a confused look.

“I didn’t ask for any ice cream Steve.” you say slightly confused

“It’s whatever, I know it’s like your favorite. On the house.” he says with a wink. He then turns to El, “Wait a second, are you even allowed to be here?”

Max and El start giggling and run away leaving you standing at the counter.

“Well, okay then.” he turns his attention to you.

“Guys, I think I’m just gonna hang out here until close! I’ll see you guys at home for dinner?” you half yell at the girls who are already out the door.

You walk around the counter and into the back room where Dustin and Robin were still sitting. They seemed to be discussing what they had found out and were trying to figure out what their next move would be. They just seemed to be all around struggling with the next few phrases. 

The week is long, The silver cat feeds, When blue meets yellow in the west. 

You weren’t sure if you should mention the fact that your mom, who knew Russian, taught you at a young age how to speak Russian, or if you should just wait to see if Steve remembers.

You choose to sit there and taunt them, making little side comments every now and then throwing them off track. The translation ended up taking well over 8 hours, seeing how they finished after the mall had already closed.

You all read out the whole phrase together for the first and final time for that day, the phrase didn’t really make any since, but you felt like this would be a good time to tell them what you had been hiding from them all day.

“You know we totally could’ve been done with this like 8 hours ago.” you say super casually.

“What?” the three of them as in unison looking at you like you were crazy.

“I mean you guys asked Robin if she knew how to speak Russian..” 

“But we never asked you- dammit!” Steve yelled.

“Steve, what’s she talking about.” Robin asks already kind of knowing where this is going.

“I’ll catch you guys tomorrow!” You say with a smirk grabbing your bag and heading for the doors.

“Holy shit.” Dustin says finally connecting the dots

“She knows Russian, (Y/N) fucking knows Russian! Her mom taught her when she was in like, the first grade or something.” Steve sighs as he puts his head in his hands.

With the biggest smirk on your face you were out the door and in your truck headed back to the cabin.

><

You walk into the cabin to music playing loudly, but coming from El’s room. You knock on the door a few times and you open the door to see Max dancing around and El looking through on of your older magazines.

“Hey guys, just wanted to let you know I’m here and was wondering if you guys wanted anything to eat.” you asked the two girls.

They both looked at you and shook their heads and then returned back to what they were doing before you walked in.

You closed the door and headed to your room leaving the door open in case they needed anything.

Suddenly you heard the music cut off but it was soon replaced with static, that could only mean one thing.

The next thing you heard was them giggling over whatever El had seen, putting a small smile on your lips.

There was a loud engine that sounded like it was pulling into the driveway meaning that your dad had finally come home for the night after his date with Joyce.

You emerged from your room to talk to your dad about how his night went. He was so excited to finally get to take her out on a date. But when he walked in the house, he obviously looked extremely drunk and would most likely be hungover in the morning.

He looked at you and then looked at El’s closed door, he suddenly became filled with anger.

“Hey- HEY! When I say 3 inches,” 

“Dad, wait it’s not what you-” you started to say as he marched furiously over to the door where he thought he would find Mike and El behind closed doors, “think.”

The door slams open and he finds not the couple, but only two innocent teenage girls lying on the floor looking at magazines and comic books.

 You stand there awkwardly with your arms crossed, watching as the mess of your father tries to hold a small conversation with the girls. He turns shuts the door and turns around to face you with a blank look on his face.

“You’re so annoying, you know that?” You ask rolling your eyes slightly annoyed but mostly playful.

Hopper just has this smug look on his face, he goes to the fridge crack open a beer and gets on his recliner knowing that the little stunt he had pulled with Mike had worked.

You were finally ready to retreat to your room when Max pops her head out the door and asks you if you want to play a game with them and you happily oblige.

><

You sit down on the floor next to the bed where El and Max have a poster with names written on papers and a glass bottle, it almost looked like they were playing spin the bottle, except they would be using Eleven’s powers to spy on people.

They spin the bottle once and it lands on Mr.Wheeler and they decide that he’s too boring to spy on so they spin again and it lands on Billy.

“I don’t know, this might not be a good idea” Max says

“No!” you say almost a little too forcefully, “No, I want to know what he’s been up to. I really haven’t seen him in a few days.”

El nods her head, and puts the blindfold on as you grab the radio from her dresser and put it on a channel with nothing but static.

The two of you wait in silence for a few minutes before El says that she’s found him.

“What’s he doing?” Max asks

“I don’t know, he’s on the floor?” El says kind of confused, ‘Talking to someone.”

There’s a long pause before she rips off her blindfold, breathing very heavily.

“What? What happened?” you ask.

She just stares at you with a distraught look on her face, like she had seen something, something she wasn’t supposed to see.

[joyful-soul-collector]

The name’s Seven

This is a continuation of one of my other snippetys called I immediately regret this decision! So you may want to read that one before you read this, but it’s not 100% required lol.

“This the place?” Tatum asked, picking up Loch and resting him on his hip as they got out of the car. 

“Yep,” said Art. “IHOP. Best pancakes you’ll ever eat in your life. At least to me anyway. It’s one of my favorite places to eat. No matter what foster home I get sent to, there’s always an IHOP around, so it’s like a nice little constant.”

“So they have food there?” Tatum said. At this point he was less concerned with Art’s life story and more worried about how Loch was shaking a little.

“Yep! You guys can get whatever you want, it’s on me. Well, it’s on my parents, but they don’t know that,” Art said, holding up a wad of bills pulled from his pocket.

When they entered the building Tatum was so assaulted with all the delicious smells that he stopped in his tracks. Both his and Loch’s stomachs rumbled loudly, and Loch actually gave a squeak of surprise at the sound. Tatum glanced at Loch, who had a pained grimace on his face.

“Hey, are you okay kiddo?” Tatum whispered so only Loch could hear. Loch nodded, but didn’t seem very sure of himself. He was still shaking. Before Tatum could say anything else to Loch, Art tapped him on the shoulder and nodded towards someone waiting on a bench. 

They had dark skin, not quite as dark as Art’s, but definitely darker than his own, and completely white, scraggly hair tied back in a short, low ponytail. One of their eyes was white and the other was dark grey, almost as dark as Tatum’s eyes. The person wore a white t-shirt and baggy blue jeans held up by a black belt. When they saw the three of them, they picked up a pair of forearm crutches leaning on the seat beside them. It was then that Tatum noticed one of their legs was a little smaller and twisted looking, though it was hard to tell under the loose pants. They started towards the three, a large grin spreading on their face.

“And by ‘friends’ you meant a friend,” Tatum said to Art in a low voice. 

“‘Friends’? Oh, right, sorry, they use they/them pronouns, I said ‘they’ and you thought there was more than one,” Art said with a laugh. “As if I were cool enough to have more than one friend at work.”

“Ohhhh,” Tatum said. 

“Artieeeeeeee,” the kid said as they approached, lifting a hand off their crutch and smacking Art’s outstretched hand. Their mismatched eyes moved to Tatum and Loch, and they gave a nod in greeting. 

“The name’s Seven,” they said. 

“Your name is Seven?” Loch said before Tatum could answer. Tatum was about to apologize for Loch’s rudeness, but Seven played it off. 

“Hells yeah it is. What’s your name squirt?”

“Loch!” Loch said. 

“Loch? What, like a lake?”

“What’s a lake?”

“It’s a loch.”

“I’m not a lake, I’m a boy!”

“Tatum,” Tatum said. 

“...Fair enough squirt.”

Seven raised their eyes to Tatum. “And who are you doom-and-gloom?”

“Loch and Tatum,” Seven said. “Well I'm starved, so how ‘bout we get seated? We should be able to get our food pretty quick, not many people have breakfast for dinner like us weirdos.” 

While Seven was right that the restaurant wasn’t exactly full, they definitely weren’t the only people there. Waiters bussled to and fro, and the air was filled with chatter. Seven and Art sat on one side of the booth while Tatum sat on the other with Loch perched on his leg so he could reach the table. The waiters had offered them a booster seat, but Loch was content with Tatum’s leg, and honestly, Tatum was terrified of letting go of Loch when he was shaking like this. He kept his hand curled safely around Loch’s middle while they scanned the options. 

Loch stared at the menu like it was a treasure chest full of all his favorite rocks. Tatum could feel Loch’s stomach growling under his hand, getting particularly great when he saw a picture of a stack of pancakes covered in rainbow sprinkles and whipped cream. Loch pointed at it and looked at Tatum, who smiled and nodded. Tatum showed his and Loch’s decisions to Art, who ordered it for them since they couldn’t read the words on the menu. 

Seven proved to be a good distraction from Tatum’s biting hunger. They were witty and sarcastic, and make Loch laugh with silly voices and faces. They weren’t afraid of swearing, even around Loch, which Tatum somehow appreciated. It made him feel more comfortable around them. He liked that Seven didn’t change their personality for anyone, they were themself and didn’t care what anyone thought. 

But as a few more minutes went by, Seven’s voices and faces didn’t seem like enough to distract Loch. He stared at every waiter, every customer eating their food, eyes wide with want. His stomach snarled and clenched constantly, and he would wince at the pain every once in awhile. It wasn’t until Seven pointed it out, that Tatum realized Loch was covering his nose with his hand as well. 

“You trying to hide or somethin’ squirt?” Seven said, gesturing to Loch’s face. He quickly put down his hands.

“Nope!” he chirped. Seven laughed, then resumed their conversation with Art. 

Tatum turned to Loch and whispered, “Are you okay? Is something wrong?” 

Loch started to shake his head when a waiter walked past them with a platter full of pancakes. He froze, then clapped a hand over his nose and mouth. His eyes welled with tears.

“Loch? Oh baby--”

Loch suddenly shoved out of Tatum’s hold, hand still over his face, and ran towards the entrance. 

“Loch? Loch! Come back!” Tatum said, jumping up. He looked at Art and Seven, who were both getting ready to chase after Loch with him, Seven reaching for their crutches. “It’s okay, just say here, I’ll get him,” Tatum said, chasing after Loch. 

For someone so small, Loch was surprisingly fast, and rounded the corner to the entrance within seconds, while it took a bit longer for Tatum to get there. When Tatum burst out the doors, he saw Loch sitting on a bench, bawling and hugging his abdomen. 

“Loch?! Loch, baby, you can’t run away from me like that. What’s wrong? Tell me, I can help,” Tatum said, rushing over to Loch and crouching in front of him. 

“It smells! So many smells!” Loch wailed. 

“Smells? What do you mean?”

“The smells! Smells-- I can’t do it!”

“I’m sorry, I just don’t understand you Loch,” Tatum said. 

“I can smell the food Tay! I can smell all the things!” Loch sobbed. And it clicked. Why Loch’s stomach wouldn’t stop grumbling, why he covered his nose, why he started to cry when a waiter walked too close with a patter full of food. 

Tatum had completely forgotten about Loch’s acute sense of smell. He was a shark Syreni after all, and just like Tatum could use echolocation, Loch could smell far better than the average person. 

Right then, a couple walked out of the restaurant, and Loch sat up ramrod straight as no doubt the scent of delicious food wafted through the doors. His belly let out a pitiful rumble and he howled in frustration, but before Tatum could do anything, Loch raised a little fist and started hitting his stomach. 

“Stop it! Be quiet! No more! Be quiet!” Loch shouted, beating his fists into his middle as hard as he could.

“Woah! No, no Loch stop!” Tatum grabbed Loch arms and held them still. When Loch couldn’t free himself he started kicking his legs, still screaming and crying. 

“Lemme go! It won’t be quiet!”

“Loch, stop, you’re not allowed to hit yourself!”

“Lemme go!” 

“No! You listen to me, you do not hurt yourself. That is against the rules, we don't hit people Loch, that includes you."

"It won't be quiet Tay! I want my tummy to be quiet…" Loch said. He stopped struggling and started to cry even harder. "I'm sorry." 

Any anger Tatum felt immediately evaporated. 

"Oh no it's okay, it's okay Little Loch, I'm the one who should be sorry, it's okay baby," Tatum let go of Loch's arms and hugged him, pressing Loch's head into his chest with his hand. He picked him up off the bench, then sat down with Loch in his lap. 

Loch sat and cried for a few minutes. Tatum rubbed Loch’s belly gently and whispered words of comfort, hoping to alleviate the pain. He’s too small, Tatum thought. Too thin, too tiny. I’ve seen four year olds before, he’s not nearly big enough. And how can someone so small be so sad? It doesn’t feel right. You’d think he was too little to be so sad, his body just isn’t big enough to hold all that emotion inside him.

When Loch calmed down a bit, and Tatum was confidant he wouldn’t start hitting himself again, he let him sit up. 

“Why didn’t you tell me it was getting too much? You lied to me Loch.”

“I dunno. I wanted to talk to Seven more. But it hurted my tummy so I closed my nose. Then it was okay.”

Tatum sighed, resting his chin on Loch’s head. 

“You gotta tell me when things aren’t okay. You don’t have to be okay all the time. Just tell me when something is wrong, alright? I might not always be able to fix it, but I’d like to know,” Tatum said. 

“M’kay. I’ll tell you next time.”

"Good. Do you think you can go inside now?" Tatum asked. Loch eyed at the doors cautiously, the grimace on his face saying he would rather not. Tatum glanced around for something that might help him. He wasn't sure what he wanted, but when he saw a bush covered in those bright, anemone-like plants, he knew that was the solution. 

Tatum leaned over and took one from the bush. 

"You remember these things?" he said, holding up the colorful plant. 

"Flowers!" Loch said. "They smell nice." 

"That's right. What if you took this in with you? You could smell it whenever you start to feel too hungry, or when someone walks by with food. How does that sound?" 

Loch considered the flower for a moment, then nodded, taking the flower and clutching it in his trembling hands. 

Tatum dabbed the tears away from Loch's face with his sleeve, and lifted him up, resting him on his hip again. 

"Ready?"

"Yep."

They walked in, Loch's flower pushed under his nose. Art and Seven were there waiting for them, both looking anxious. For some reason it made Tatum happy to see people worried about them. It was nice to know they cared. 

"Everything aight?" Seven said. 

"Yeah, he was just a little overwhelmed. We’re okay now though, right Little Loch?" Tatum said, sitting down. 

Loch only nodded. 

"Aw, I'm sorry squirt. Glad you're all good now though! I’m startin' to get attached to ya, wouldn’t wantcha to get hurt," Seven said. They reached across the table and ruffled Loch's hair, and Loch smiled. 

It was a few more agonizing minutes before food was finally set in front of them. Loch trembled with hunger and excitement, and wasted no time in picking up one of his rainbow sprinkled pancakes and tearing off a large bite, not paying any attention to the syrup sitting next to him. Loch’s flower lay forgotten beside his plate as Tatum held him steady for a minute or so, knowing he could barely hold himself upright at this point. Tatum didn’t give his own food even a glance; he hadn’t really paid attention when he picked it out anyway, and he was just happy Loch finally got something in his belly. 

“Tatum, eat,” Art said seriously. Art pushed Tatum’s plate of what Art called “eggs and toast” closer to him. When Tatum didn’t take it right away, Loch grabbed one of the slices of toast and shoved it under Tatum’s nose.

“Make your tummy quiet. I can hear it,” Loch said, low enough that neither Art or Seven could overhear. 

Tatum wouldn’t have noticed if Loch didn’t point it out, but it seems Loch’s wasn’t the only belly growling. Tatum had thought his stomach was past complaining at this point, it’s been three days since he’s eaten, he assumed it would’ve given up by now. He hadn’t realized just how empty he was until he swallowed his first bite, and then suddenly the hunger was like a long lost memory rushing to the surface. Tatum then wolfed down his pancakes and eggs, savoring every single bite. 

“You can’t beat IHOP,” Seven said, moaning at the taste of their eggs. “The food at the shelter isn’t nearly as good as this.”

Tatum didn’t know what Seven meant by ‘the shelter’, but Art froze. 

“Food at the shelter?” Art said slowly. “You’re homeless?” Tatum knew what that meant. 

“Yeah! You didn’t know that?” Seven said, like it was no big deal. “I thought everyone at work knew.”

“I didn’t,” Art said solemnly.

“Really? Not even a little bit suspicious?” Seven said with a snort. 

“Well you’re not exactly wearing a tag that says ‘Hello I’m Homeless!’ on it.”

“Sure I am! It’s on one of the three shirts I own, I probably just left it in my backpack back at the shelter.”

“Stop saying sad stuff like it’s a joke!” Art whined.

“Oh then you definitely don’t wanna hear about how great my shower was at the YMCA, they had a disability bathroom with a seat, it was real fancy--”

“Sssssstoppppppp--"

"I'm just saying you should've been able to tell just from my clothes. You could say I have a poor sense of fashion--"

"SEVEN!"

Seven erupted into a fit of laughter, ducking their head and pounding their fists on their knees. 

"God I love making people feel guilty like that, it's fuckin hilarious man," they said, taking a bite of their food. 

Tatum smiled at Seven, who gasped and pointed at Tatum's face. 

"I got Doomsday Boy to smile! Now I just gotta getcha to talk and we're on our way to bein' best of friends."

Tatum made a snap decision that if he had thought about more, he might not have made. 

“We’re homeless too,” he said. 

“YO what? No way!” Seven said. They were almost excited, happy there was someone around their age they could relate to. But their face suddenly fell as they looked at Loch, still cramming pancakes into his mouth. 

“The squirt too, huh?”

“Yeah.” 

“But, he’s young enough for the foster system. Me 'n you have aged out, but Loch hasn’t,” Seven said. Tatum glanced at Art, who answered for him. 

“Tatum is actually seventeen, so they both are young enough, but they have had some really bad experiences with the system. They’re kind of on the run right now, until Tatum turns eighteen. I’m helping them.”

Seven gazed at Tatum and Loch, and for the first time their mismatched eyes were actually somber and quiet. Loch looked up from his plate at the lack of conversation. 

“Are you sad Seven?” Loch asked, a dollop of whipped cream on his cheek. Tatum expected Seven to lie, but they didn’t. 

“A little bit.”

“Why?”

Seven opened their mouth, then closed it, then opened it again. 

“You and your brother have a hard time sometimes. Makes me sad you gotta go through that.”

“Oh.” Loch stared at Seven for a moment, then suddenly hopped out of Tatum’s lap. He crawled under the table and came up on the other side right next to Seven, then hugged them tightly around their neck.

“Oh--Haha! Aw, you don’t have to worry about me, squirt,” Seven said. But they hugged him back anyway. Tatum watched as they paused a little when their hand met his ribs, smoothing a thumb over the bumps. They glanced at Loch’s plate, which only had half a pancake left and smiled a little. 

“Ya almost cleaned your plate! Musta been pretty hungry,” they said as Loch released them. 

Loch hesitated, looking at Tatum for instructions. 

“It’s okay, they’re nice,” Tatum said. Loch looked back at Seven, then nodded. 

“Pretty hungry,” Loch echoed. “Good now though. All filled up.”

“Good job squirt.”

Tag List: @emerald-roses @van-lukas @commasinsidequotes @pen-in-hand @wangmangagavroche @thescholarsninja @oneleggedflamingo @bitchqueen1114 @bogsheep @writingiswilde @oddly--queer @flyingfalconflower12 @belles-library @raspberrylimerichie @idonthaveartideas @topazastral @sunlight-and-starskies @quirky-squid @words-in-the-works @precise-magic @kos-ire @apocalyvse @panic-at-my-sexuality

If you want to be added or removed from the tag list, don’t hesitate to ask! I don’t mind either way!

[athena-athena]

We Can’t Do That Here (Yondu x Reader)

A/N: This story came about because I dropped sour cream on my sweater during lunch one day.  A discussion ensued with @rooker-character-fics, and I decided to write this.  Although I changed it from sour cream to oil in the fic.  XD  

Tagged List:  @celticheart72 @animeaniseed @misfitgirlwrites  (As always, if you wanted to be added or removed to/from my tagged list, just let me know!  I promise you won’t hurt my feelings if you want to be removed.  😊)

Warnings:  Just some smut.  

You can also find this on AO3, along with the rest of my fics.  

__

"Pass me the wrench, will ya?" You picked it up and handed it to Yondu. "Here ya go." "Thanks, Y/N." "What do you think is wrong with it?" "Dunno fer sure. Might be tha motor." "Can you fix it?" "'Course I can." He rolled out from under the M-ship to give you a wink, then rolled back to continue what he was doing.

That wink was enough to send your senses into a whirlwind. You'd joined Yondu's crew three months earlier, and spent most of that time in "on-the-job training" with the other Ravagers. It was only in the last couple of weeks that Yondu had taken more of an interest in your training. You'd admired him from afar, but spending so much time with him lately had definitely made your feelings stronger. And though there had been a couple of times when you'd thought there was a mutual sexual tension, Yondu never made a move, and you were afraid you'd just imagined it. "Lookit this, Y/N. See how that piece right there looks burned?" You leaned closer to him so you could see where he was pointing. "Yeah." "That's our problem. We're gonna hafta replace it. Here, slide on under here. I'll let ya handle it." "Oh, okay. Sure." You hoped your face wasn't red as you laid down and slid next to him under the M-ship. Your first thought was that it was awfully hot under the M-ship, but realized that probably had more to do with the proximity of the Centaurian next to you, and less to do with the temperature of the room itself. "Here ya go. Let's see what'cha can do." You took the wrench from him and studied the mess of parts above your head. "Wha’dya gotta do first?" You thought for a moment, then replied, "I need to remove the screws on this panel..." "Right! Go ‘head an' take ‘em out." You placed the wrench aside and picked up a screwdriver. Removing the eight small screws, you handed them to Yondu, then removed the panel. "What's next?" "I need to disconnect the hose so I can get the motor out." "Yep." Feeling slightly more confident, you pulled the hose loose, only to be rewarded by a stream of oil. Sputtering, you slid out from under the M-ship, Yondu right behind you. "Aw, hell. Them morons told me they'd already drained the oil." He pulled a small towel from his pocket and handed it to you. You started to wipe the oil off your face as Yondu stood up and ordered, "Go ‘head an' get that shirt off so's we can get ya cleaned up. Gotta get that oil outta yer leathers perty fast or it'll never come out." You felt your face flame and your eyes grow wide. He turned to grab a bucket to catch the oil that was still pouring out, then turned back to see you still standing there. "C'mon, get that off now." You weren't sure if he'd forgotten you were a woman and not just another member of the crew, or if he just didn't care. Of course, considering you were currently covered in oil from the ship, you probably looked like any other member of the crew. "I ain't gonna tell ya again. If that oil sets in them leathers, you'll hafta get more, an' that's gonna come outta yer wages." "Oh… okay. Could you at least… turn around?" "What? Why?" He gave you a confused look, then suddenly said, "Oh… yeah. Sorry." He turned away from you, and you pulled off your shirt, feeling utterly exposed standing there in your bra. "Okay..." He turned around and took the shirt from you as you crossed your arms over your chest. He laid it out on an empty table, then sprinkled it with talcum powder. "That'll pull tha oil out, an' then ya can clean it." You nodded. Standing in front of him, half-naked, as the memory of him ordering you to take off your shirt replayed on loop in your head, it was all you could do not to faint on the spot. He grabbed a clean washcloth from a box beside the table and gestured to your chest. "Need ta get that oil off ya." You glanced down and realized that the oil had indeed gotten inside your shirt, and was now dripping down your chest. You were afraid your bra was beyond saving. "Oh, right." You held out a hand for the washcloth, but Yondu said, "Lemme help ya." You met his eyes at those words, and you were pretty sure he'd remembered you were a woman. You were also pretty sure you weren't the only one feeling the sexual tension now. He guided you to stand next to the sink as he ran water over the washcloth. "Might be kinda cold. Takes a while fer it ta warm up, ya know." "It's okay." It was probably for the best anyway – the cold water might cool you off and bring you back to your senses. You held your breath as he began to gently remove the oil from your body, starting with the mostly-innocent area of your shoulders. As he moved his hand lower, down your arms, you let out a shaky breath. He met your eyes and smirked. "Ya okay?" "Yep." You tried for an unconcerned attitude, but you knew he saw right through it. He rinsed the washcloth, then started to slowly wipe the oil from your chest. "Reckon yer bra's ruined." "Yeah, I think you're right. And I loved this one, too!" You looked down at your poor bra in consternation. He ran a finger under the strap, as he said, "Ya probably need ta take it off." Your eyes lifted to meet his as a shiver ran through your body. "What?" "We won't ever get all tha oil off if half of ya's covered with yer bra." "Oh… is that the only reason?" "Nah." He flashed you a crooked grin, and you couldn't help returning it. "I don't think I should be the only one half-naked, though." "That right?" "Mmhmm." "A'right then." He handed you the washcloth and removed his duster and shirt. "That better?" "Much better." "Yer turn." His grin grew wider as you passed the washcloth back to him. "A deal's a deal." "Okay." You felt a little self-conscious, but the lust in his eyes was obvious as you slowly removed your bra and dropped it to the ground. "Do you normally help crew members get cleaned up?" "Nope. I mighta had an ulterior motive fer wantin' ta help ya." "Is that right?" "Yep." He stepped closer to you and ran one of his hands up your arm as the other snaked around your waist. "Yer skin's so smooth." Blushing, you replied, "Thanks..." "I wanna see if tha rest a ya's this smooth." "I'm… I'm pretty sure it is." "Need ta see fer myself." He winked at you, as he began to unbutton your pants. You put your hand on his to stop him, and he looked at you, concern in his eyes. "What's wrong?" "We can't do this in here!" "Why not?" "Anyone could walk in!" "Ain't nobody comin' in here. If they come in here, it means they gotta work, an' ain't none of ‘em gonna do any work unless they's ordered to, the lazy excuses fer Ravagers." "Are you sure?" "Positive. C'mere." He pulled you back to him, and returned his hands to the button of your pants, giving you a questioning look. You bit your lip and nodded, causing him to softly growl, as he unbuttoned your pants and slid his hand inside. "Oh, damn," you whispered. "Ya like that, huh?" "Yes..." You were already breathless, and he chuckled. "'S gonna get better." He kissed you, slowly at first, then growing more insistent. As he deepened the kiss, you found the buckle of his belt and started to remove it. He removed his hands from your skin to help you unbutton his pants, then broke the kiss to remove his boots and pants. "Hang on a second..." He pulled a clean mat off a shelf and tossed it on the floor, as you removed your own boots. You couldn't help the nervous laugh that escaped you. "Are we really going to do this… here?" "Yep." He sat down on the mat, then pulled you down next to him. "An' ya don't need these," he added, pulling your pants off. He kissed you again, as he lowered you down to lie back on the mat, then murmured, "Or these." Pulling off your panties, he tossed him over his shoulder and lowered himself on top of you. As he kissed your neck, you grabbed the waistband of his underwear, and whispered, "You don't need yours, either." He nipped your neck gently, and you whimpered, as he pulled his underwear off. __ Several minutes later – or it could have been several days, you weren't sure – Yondu finally spoke. "We need ta get yer shirt cleaned soon." "Mmhmm." He leaned up on his elbow and grinned at you. "How're ya feelin'?" "Amazing." He chuckled, and replied, "Glad ta hear it." "What about you?" "Never been better." "Good." You smiled at him, and he leaned down to kiss you. As he broke the kiss, you said, "I guess we should try to finish fixing the M-ship." "Nah, I'm gonna get some a tha crew ta do it. We got more important things ta do." "Oh? Like what?" "I'm gonna take ya ta my quarters, an' we're gonna have a lil' more fun." He flashed you his crooked grin, and you shivered in anticipation. "What about my shirt?" "Ya ain't gonna need it." "I'll need something to get to your quarters. We can't just walk there without wearing any clothes." "Well, we could." He winked, and you laughed. "Well, you can if you want, but I'd rather not." "Yeah, I'd rather ya didn't, too. Don't want nobody but me seein' ya like this." "You don't have to worry about that." "Good." He helped you stand, then said, "I'm gonna get somebody ta clean yer shirt, too. Ya can wear mine ‘til we get ta my quarters." "What are you going to wear?" "Nothin'." You laughed. "You're going to just walk completely naked all the way to your quarters?" "Well, maybe I'll wear my pants." "Probably a good idea. Your crew might think their Captain has lost it if they see you walking around without any clothes." "Or they'll just think a beautiful woman has gone ta my head." You flushed at his words. "Well, it's still probably best if you at least wear your pants in the corridors." "Yer probably right." He picked up his pants, and pulled them on, as you started collecting your scattered clothes.

You put on your pants as Yondu picked up his shirt and draped it around you. You slid your arms into the sleeves, and he helped you button it up. You both pulled on your boots, then Yondu picked up his communicator, pressed a button, and said, "Kraglin! Need ya to finish fixin' that M-ship in the maintenance bay. Get somebody ta help ya." "Aye, Cap'n." "Oh, an' I need ya to clean Y/N's shirt. ‘S'got oil all over it." "Oh… okay, Cap'n. No problem." "An' make sure nobody bothers me in my quarters tonight. Yer in charge." Kraglin's voice sounded a bit stronger as he replied, "I'll handle it, Cap'n." Yondu disconnected the call, wrapped his arms around your waist, and murmured in your ear, "Let's get outta here before Kraglin an' tha others get here. I don't know how much longer I can wait ta get ya undressed again." You moaned softly as he kissed your neck, then grabbed his hand and started pulling him along as you walked backward in the direction of the door. "I can't wait much longer, either." He grinned at you, and said, "I hope ya ain't got no plans tonight." "Oh, I do, but they all involve you." Flashing you a wicked grin, he picked you up, and said, "Then what're we waitin' fer?"   

[scribblestatic]

We want chocolate milk.

“I waaan...want chocolate milk, please.”

Inko smiles down at her son, as does the woman on the other side of the register.

“Alright, we’ll be sure to give you a chocolate milk, dearie!” the woman says, putting his Little Might meal into the order.

He hasn’t gone back to school yet, but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t go out at all. No, on days when he feels more energized, his momma takes him places, like the shopping mall, and the grocery stores, and to his favorite fast food restaurant.

It has a playground, which is fun sometimes, but most importantly, it has his favorite Little Might meal—a small cheeseburger, a choice of fruit for the side, and a choice of small drink. For Izuku, the latter is automatically chocolate milk, but the deep voice likes to remind him of it. Today’s side is apples, because his momma’s worried about his teeth.

As the two wait for their food, his momma sits them down at a booth seat, other people around in their own seats as they eat or let their children run wild and screaming in the play area.

We should play.

“Hmm?”

“Yes baby?” His momma asks, smiling at him.

“Oh. Nothin’. M’ just thinkin’.”

She giggles at him, then looks back over at the counter where more orders are being taken. Not wanting to catch her attention again, lowers his voice to a whisper and plays with the salt shaker.

“What?”

We should go play. We want to stretch our legs.

“...I dunno,” Izuku frowns. “I wanna play at home.”

Izuku thinks up a good memory for the deep voice to understand. He learned that the deep voice needs memories to learn and reflect things. That’s why whenever the deep voice wanted to understand something, Izuku felt like he was thinking. And that one time with the nasty taste, that was the deep voice telling him something. The deep voice just hadn’t expect Izuku to listen so hard.

So Izuku thinks up the day he and met the gooey dog. But not of the gooey dog itself. He thinks of the minutes before, with Kacchan using an explosion on his cheek, and the others punching and kicking him until he couldn’t stand up anymore for a while.

“Playing outside is bad...”

...We will eat them.

Izuku pauses, his fingers knocking over the salt shaker. A little bit of salt sprinkles onto the table. “...Huh?”

We will eat them. Then we can play.

“N-No! Nooo, we can’t eat people! That would be bad!” He whispers against the table, his face pressed against the cool material. “No people! No eating people!”

If we take their brains, they can’t hurt us. We eat their brains. No more pain.

“No! It’s okay! I like playing inside!” Izuku quickly thinks of his toys, of his building blocks, of his All Might and his Barbies and his plastic grunts to be the villains. He thinks of all the fun he has watching TV and painting and writing stories and studying heroes. All of that can be done inside. He likes playing inside. And when he’s outside, he likes playing alone!

Hmmm...fine. We won’t eat them.

Izuku sighs in relief.

Yet.

“No!”

“Izuku?”

The little boy startles, his mother having left and come back with the tray with their food. She blinks down at her son, her face twisted with concern.

“Mmm...nothing, Mumma.”

His mom doesn’t look convinced, but Izuku’s genuine glee at his food changes her mind from asking. He hasn’t told her about the deep voice yet. He doesn’t think he will tell her, only because she gets so worried all the time. He doesn’t want her to worry about the deep voice.

“Itadakimasu,” his mom says, her hands pressed together. Izuku mimics her.

“Itadakuuu...Itadakimasu.”

Itadakimasu.

Izuku giggles, and opens his mouth wide to take a bite of his burger. He has to open his mouth wider now because of his longer teeth, but he doesn’t mind. It’s easier to chew because of them! So he chews and chews and swallows his favorite burger, and grins at his momma as he licks the mayonnaise off the corner of his mouth.

Drink the milk.

Not yeeeet, Izuku thinks. The bites into the burger again.

But...he frowns. It’s delicious. It’s as delicious as it’s always been. But something has been smelling really, really good ever since they entered the building. He thought the burgers would be extra delicious today or something, but they’re just regular delicious. What is it that smells so good then?

He looks up at his mom to maybe ask her what smells good, but then he realizes with a sniffle that the good smell is closer than before.

In fact, it’s right in front of him.

What is that? Find it.

I’m looking, Izuku thinks.

She has a burger just like he does. It’s a bigger burger than his—she’s a grown up and has a bigger stomach, so more food fits into her than it does into him. But the burger isn’t the thing that smells extra good. He looks at her cup. He can hear the clinking of ice and the bubbling of soda. He’s had a little soda once—it really burned on the way down to his tummy!! But the soda isn’t what smells extra good either. Besides, he has chocolate milk.

So he looks at what’s left on her tray and...there’s fries.

He sniffles again.

...Yes...yes, that’s it. That’s it!

We want that! Fries? Fries! We want the fries! Give us fries!!

“Mumma? Can I have a fry?”

“Hmm? Oh, sure sweetie.”

She puts a fry on his tray, and Izuku picks it up. He’s had fries before, of course, but this one...it smells really, really good.

“...Izuku?”

He keeps staring at the fry until he pops it into his mouth, and suddenly, an explosion of good flavors seep into him, making his whole body hum with pleasant tingles. It’s not a mellow sweetness like chocolate milk. It’s much more savory, and Izuku realizes how much he’s missed it.

“Izuku, are you okay?”

So good...it’s so good! It’s even better than the Little Might burger, and that’s saying something.

This...this is what we want. This is good too! More! Give us more fries!!

“Mumma! Mumma, please! I want more fries! Please, please?!”

His mom looks startled at his outburst as he basically bounces in his seat, staring up at her with the purest of desires.

“Please please, Mumma! Gimme fries!”

Fries!! We want fries!! And chocolate milk!!

“Fries please, Mummy!! Fries please!”

“O-Okay dear! Okay, settle down! Here, yes, you can have some—“

Izuku doesn’t wait for her to finish talking. The instant she starts pouring some of the fries out of the little container they gave them to her in onto his tray, he’s grabbing at the hot things with his fists. He barely registers the heat as he stuffs them in his mouth, more of the pleasant savory taste making him tingle! It’s so good! So delicious! It’s like he’s discovered chocolate milk all over again! Chocolate milk...he should drink that, too!!

Not even hearing his mother’s voice, he reaches over and grabs the cup, putting the straw in his mouth and sucking up a load of milk. The savory taste mixes with the mellow sweetness in a salty-sweet dance on his nerve endings, and his brain sends all kinds of good, tastiness through the rest of his body. It tastes so good. He feels so good! He’s so happy!

He grabs another handful of hot fries—hot? Is it hot? He can barely tell.—and eats it right up, then sucks up more chocolate milk. What a delicious mix...it’s so good! He just wants to eat fries and drink chocolate milk for the rest of the afternoon!

——

Inko watches, startled.

It’s like her son has come alive, just like how he did when he discovered chocolate milk in the hospital.

Despite the fries being steamy hot, his little hands grab handfuls of them and stuff them into his mouth. His eyes are glittering with visible excitement and joy, and when he grabs his milk and starts sucking it up, she knows. She knows it’s related to the strangeness surrounding her son. The strange fever, the strange teeth, the strange desires for chocolate milk.

And now fries.

She hears murmurs to the side and looks over, watching as the family there quickly turn their eyes away to act like they weren’t gossiping. And when she looks back, the fries are all gone, and Izuku is licking his...

Palm.

The palm of his hand.

The palm that looks as pale as usual despite having grabbed steaming hot fries. He’s licking all of the salt and taste off of his palm with his cute little tongue, a happy grin on his face that has his cheeks flushing, flashing his fangs at anyone looking at him.

But he’s so happy...

As they leave, Izuku still hyper and happy and sipping on chocolate milk, Inko orders one large fries and another small chocolate milk. 

He squeals with absolute happiness.

She takes the forgotten Little Might burger with them to put into the refrigerator.

[saoirse-argentum]

I decided it would be more entertaining (for myself at least) to answer these as Saoirse…So I did…Everything outside of the last set of Q and A anyway. Haurchefant also makes a guest appearance. XD

B A S I C S .

FULL NAME:   Saoirse Argentum! NICKNAME(S): Sunshine and Somebunny. I’m told I have a cheery disposition and I love puns.   AGE: 29. BIRTHDAY: 19th Sun of the 1st Astal Moon (Jan. 19th) ETHNIC GROUP: Viera, Rava. NATIONALITY: Gridanian.  LANGUAGE(S) : Common. Dalmascan. High Ivalician. And I’m pretty sure I’ve figured out Mooglespeak….Kupo. SEXUAL ORIENTATION: I like them Elezen boys…and I’m a sucker for a handsome Dragoon.   ROMANTIC ORIENTATION: Heteromantic and hopeless. RELATIONSHIP STATUS: Eternally pining over Estinien. HOME TOWN/AREA: Old Gridania. CURRENT HOME: I still call Old Gridania home, but I spend a lot of time in Ishgard. PROFESSION: White Mage, Serpent Captain for the Order of the Twin Adder…Secretly a Gunbreaker…A bad one, but a girl can dream!

P H Y S I C A L .

HAIR: Brunette EYES: Green. FACE: Hmm. How did Haurchefant put it? You know what, I’ll just let him answer these next few. “If I had a star for every time her beauty brightened my day, I would have a galaxy.” LIPS: “Pink, supple and saccharine.” COMPLEXION: “Lightly sun-kissed.” BLEMISHES: “Not a one in sight…but her freckles…sprinkled like sugar and sweet.” SCARS: “None that I can see…Perhaps I should check.” “No.” TATTOOS: “A heart with my name on it, just above her breast.” “ALSO NO!” HEIGHT:  “Approx. 5’8”. Short for a Viera…I could just keep her in my pocket.” WEIGHT: “A gentleman would never tell.” “130lbs.” BUILD: “Like a brickhouse.” FEATURES: “Long lashes, slender legs, and her breasts—” “Okay, you’re done here.” ALLERGIES: Bananas and cats…both of which I enjoy. A true tragedy. USUAL HAIR STYLE:  Curled with angled bangs and styled to rest over my shoulder on one side. USUAL FACE LOOK: I smile a lot, I guess? USUAL CLOTHING: Thigh-high boots, skirts and dresses, and while in dungeons generally my White Mage robes.

P S Y C H O L O G Y .

FEAR(S): Loss. Letting my friends down…and the dark. ASPIRATION(S): Protect Eorzea, learn to be as good a fighter as I am a healer, and win the heart of Ishgard’s Grandest Grump! POSITIVE TRAITS: I suppose my empathy and optimism. NEGATIVE TRAITS: I can be stubborn and sometimes my shyness can be misconstrued as coldness. MBTI:  INFJ (“The Advocate”) ZODIAC: Capricorn. TEMPERAMENT: Somewhere between Melancholic and Phlegmatic. SOUL TYPE(S): An artisan.   ANIMAL(S): Vulpes Vulpes! Or the Astute Fox, a charming carnivore. VICE HABIT(S): I can be relatively reckless at times. FAITH: By the Twelve! GHOSTS?: Where?! AFTERLIFE?: Yes. There is something after all this. REINCARNATION?: I wouldn’t say it’s an impossibility all things considered. ALIENS?: I’m like 75% sure that Hildibrand is from another planet. POLITICAL ALIGNMENT: I’m a proud member of the Eorzean Alliance. EDUCATION LEVEL:  I have a high desire for learning, so I study whatever I can, when I can.

F A M I L Y .

FATHER: I never met him and my mother spoke little of him. MOTHERS:  Relme Argentum. SIBLINGS: Only child. EXTENDED FAMILY: Cassie Drauman…We’re practically sisters. NAME MEANING(S): Saoirse means “freedom” and Argentum is a metal so it’s considered “shining” in some circles. HISTORICAL CONNECTION?: None that I can verify. When I was kid, I heard rumors that my father was Hyur: Hilghlander who fought for Ala Mhigo during the Garlean invasion.

F A V O R I T E S .

BOOK: I love so many…but I enjoy a good romance story. DEITY: Menphina. HOLIDAY: Heavensturn. MONTH: October…there’s just a certain feeling in the air. SEASON: Fall PLACE: The Dravanian Hinterlands, near Matoya’s Cave! WEATHER: Brisk Autumn days with just a slight breeze…enough to stir the leaves.   SOUND(S): Soft rain and crackling fires. Thunder and crunch of leaves beneath your feet. SCENT(S): The smell of earth after it rains. Strawberries and roses. TASTE(S):  Whiskey kisses. <3 FEEL(S): Plush Velvets…Estinien’s hair. >_> <_< ANIMAL(S): Estinien…but really, puppies. NUMBER(S): 19 is my lucky number! COLOR(S): Pink and pastels.

E X T R A .

TALENT(S): My propensity for puns. BAD AT: Dance and tanking…which obviously go hand in hand. TURN ONS: Estinien is glaring really hard at me right now… TURN OFFS: Cruelty. Smelling like a Sahagin corpse covered in moldy stone cheese. HOBBIES: Reading, sleeping, and baking. TROPES: White Mage, Healing Hands, Girl Next Door, Manic Pixie Dream Girl, and the Klutz. QUOTE(S): “To let evil do evil, to do nothing in its presence is the same as taking their side. Being a hero means taking a stand.”  “I used to be good at wordplay…once a pun a time.”

M U N   Q U E S T I O N S .

Q1: If you could write your character your way in their own movie, what would it be called, what style would it be filmed in, and what would it be about? A1:  It doesn’t matter what I write, romance is usually central to the storyline, so it wouldn’t be any different with Saoirse. It would probably be a reverse harem style anime and all her party members would be beautiful men (standard archetypes) who want to protect Eorzea alongside her while vying for her heart. It would be called: All My Party Members are Bachelors. XD

Q2: What would their soundtrack/score sound like? A2: Probably a combination of Ayumi Hamasaki and Abingdon Boys School.

Q3: Why did you start writing this character? A3: She has a strong, bubbly voice and I spend so much time working on projects with more reserved heroines that it’s nice to break away from that without having to stress over my problematic perfectionism.

Q4: What first attracted you to this character? A4: I really like writing from the perspective of a character who doesn’t take herself too seriously…It makes writing dialogue enjoyable because I don’t have to stress about whether or not she’s actually funny so long as she finds herself amusing.

Q5: Describe the biggest thing you dislike about your muse. A5: Sometimes she’s a little too passive or naïve. I think part of that is because I’m so used to playing as a healer that I forget she can be strong in other ways.

Q6: What do you have in common with your muse?           A6: We’re both hopeless romantics and we both enjoy really simple humor…so easily amused.

Q7: How does your muse feel about you? A7: I dunno, let me ask.

“Are you French?...Because Eiffel for you.”

Ha!

Q8: What characters does your muse have interesting interactions with? A8: As a Manic Pixie Dream Girl, her most interesting interactions are with grumps or others with her sense of humor. Either way the banter is generally amusing.

Q9: What gives you inspiration to write your muse?     A9: Listening to music is one, but drawing is another one. I love drawing Saoirse with other characters and imagining scenes or interactions to bring to life visually and that generally spurs my writing.

Q10: How long did this take you to complete? A10: About two hours…because my dogs and significant other really enjoy distracting me, but it’s cool because I enjoy it too.

[misfitsluug]

just listen to my voice | kritz

uhh this story is kinda old, so im sorry if it sucks; also kritz (kryoz nd fitz) is an underrated ship change my mind. i wanna upload more but im very slow with writing so im gonna upload an old story i wrote a while back lmao,,

anyways, hopefully it’s good! jus a reminder there’s some heavy subjects like, right off the bat so if your uncomfortable, then don’t read it! thank you, and have fun reading :•)

-

/ o n e. /

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cam.

The best way to start off the first night of summer vacation is when your Dad decides to kick you out of the house, again. "Fuck you, too," I muttered angrily to myself, kicking a rock that rolled onto the road beside me.

Usually, I don't come till he calls me, telling me about how pissed he is at me for staying out too late. I find it unfair, but I don't say much about it.

Anyway, I head down my favorite diner, my music blasting through my ears and my backpack slung around my left shoulder.

The night breeze hitting my face, the sky sprinkled with tiny stars while the lights from cars and stores passed by.

Once I finally approached the diner, I opened the door with a swing as the bell rang above me. I sat down at a booth next to the window, taking a peek through the menu in front of me.

"Hey, welcome to Nancy's finest wines and dines," The boy in front of me said, I took out one of my earbuds and smiled up at him.

He had blonde bleached hair with brown strips here and there with different moles scattered on his pale face; I took a glance at his name tag.

"Dahlia?" I asked, he chuckled awkwardly. "My name isn't actually Dahlia if your wondering, just covering a shift for a buddy. You can call me John," He replied, pausing as he looked down at the table. "Oh, uhm- you're looking through a kid's menu."

"Huh?" I looked down as well before realizing he was right. "Well, it's pretty late. Can't blame myself I guess."

"Alright, well, lemme fetch you a different menu. Unless you prefer your little kids' menu with crayons?"

"I'll keep the crayons," I grabbed the crayons and managed to make John laugh again. "Okay, I'll be right back."

I watched John walk behind the counter, reaching underneath to pull out a bigger menu and walking back to me. "Do you actually want something to eat?"

"Nah, in all honesty, I just wanted to order a coffee."

"Couldn't you have said that before?"

"Yeah but I'm an asshole like that," I stated, he rolled his eyes and smiled, leaving without a word. I had to admit though, he was pretty cute.

After a couple of minutes, he came back with a mug of coffee and a small bowl of coffee creamers. "Here ya go, uhm.."

"Cameron, Cam for short if you want."

"Here ya go, Cam," He restated, placing everything down before sitting down. "Since your my only customer tonight, tell me more about youself. I'm curious."

"So am I," I retorted, pouring creamer into the coffee.

"Ooh, very mysterious," He said intrigued.

"Maybe," I winked at him.

"Maybe?" He giggled, only making me laugh a bit too.

"You are beautiful," I muttered, slightly blown away at how this conversation is playing out.

"Really? I find that quite doubtful."

"Really? I find what you said quite doubtful," I repeated. "So, Dahlia-"

"It's John."

"What're you doing later?"

"Probably goin’ home, why?"

"Just wondering, gonna head down the train tracks tonight. A little adventure mind you," I explained, a small grin plastered on my face.

"Adventure?" John inquired. "Shouldn't you be going home? It's pretty late."

"Huh, never took you for goody-two-shoes. My dad kicked me out again and I ain't going back yet so might as well entertain myself," I added, taking a sip of my coffee.

"Hm, I'm interested, but what if I don't have any fun on your adventure?"

"That solely depends on you, doesn't it? Plus, I'm pretty good at having fun, maybe more than you if you're so worried about me staying out too late."

"Sounds like a challenge."

"If that's what you want it to be," I dared with a grin.

"Well, my shift ends in a couple of minutes. Mind waiting for a little?"

"I've got all the time in the world, honey," I reassured, John opened his mouth to say something but the man inside the kitchen coughed loudly, catching his attention as he stood up awkwardly.

"As you can see, I should be on my way. Before I go, do you not want anything else?"

"Nah, go ahead and do your job, Dahlia," I joked, John shot a non-threatening look while walking away. I smiled again, the hot rush of the coffee racing down my throat.

I popped my earbud back into my ear, spacing out with my coffee in my hands. After maybe, 20 minutes, I silently glanced behind me a while later, a pair of red doors opened and John walked out without his uniform. He wore a yellow, red and blue hoodie with white ripped jeans. "Hey, you ready?"

"Yeah, let's go," I replied, standing up from the table, turning off my music and putting my phone away inside my backpack, leaving the diner behind.

-

Silence filled the night air; the sound of leaves, sticks, and dirt crunching underneath us while walking through the forest. "Have you been here before?"

"No, I heard about there being abandoned apartments down nearby the train tracks, thought that I might as well check it out tonight," I answered, John nodded. "What about your backpack?"

"Eh, just full of spray paint."

"You know you could be arrested for that?"

"As long as I don't get caught."

"Good point," John answered. We chatted a bit more until finding the train tracks. "Finally, Jesus Christ."

"We still gotta walk more, you do realize that?"

"Yeah well, at least we found your dumbass train tracks," John grumbled.

"You know, you never told me why your Dad kicked you out. You don't gotta tell me but I'm just curious."

"He does that often, it's honestly a habit. He's technically my foster Dad," I continued, I chose not to go into detail. "I dunno, I love him but he can kiss my ass."

"Oh, sorry about that," John mumbled.

"Appreciate it," I answered, it wasn't anything uncomfortable for me to talk about. At some point, a building peered over the trees and as soon as we got closer, we were already there.

"Wow, it looks kinda beautiful."

"Yeah, it does," I agreed, stepping closer to the the apartments, admiring the art scribbled upon the grey walls as I opened up my backpack and pulled out my light pink spray paint, writing my signature (just the word Cam).

"Woah, can I try?" John asked, I nodded and he scrambled through my backpack, after a while, he finally pulled out a blue spray can. "You can do it, Dahlia!"

"Shut the fuck up, Cam," He sneered but I laughed in response, watching him try to write on the wall. "Here, lemme help you," I offered, I put my hand on his as I assisted him with the can, letting him write in his signature. "There you go, told you I'm obviously better at having more fun."

"I gotta admit, that was pretty sick."

"You sure you're up for this?"

"Yeah, why?"

"Because you said 'that was pretty sick' but I don't want you to end up getting sick," I teased, John fake-laughed in response.

"Whatever, douche," John insulted, painting more weird scribbles and I joined him. Our laughter was the only thing heard beside the sound of wind and crickets chirping. We painted all over the wall, covering other people's drawings in the process too.

John painted an extremely detailed penis, making the both of us laugh until a snap was heard in the distance.

"Cam?" John inquired, I was still laughing a bit before responding.

"Yeah? What's up?"

"Did you hear that?"

"Uhh, no. Why, what'd you hear?" I asked again, then a much harsher voice shouted.

"WHO'S THERE?!" It shouted, I knew that tone anywhere as I immediately grabbed John by his hand and my backpack, scurrying out as the policeman shouted at us.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck-" John repeated, his words laced with anxiety.

"We'll be fine, calm down," I spoke, still running until we lost the man in the forest.

We both took deep breaths, leaning against a tree. "I'm-I'm never going another adventure with you again."

"Trust me, you are," I raised my brow with a grin, he huffed and cupped his face. "Jesus fuck, that was terrifyingly delightful."

"Exactly why your gonna wanna go on another adventure one day."

"Fuck off," He spat, I felt a buzz run through my backpack as I grabbed my phone. "Hey, Dad," I sighed, rubbing my head. "Yeah, I'll get home soon- I know. No, I'm not with anybody. Okay, bye.," I hung up.

"What was that about?" John requested.

"Ah, just Dad yelling at me that I gotta go home," I spoke, looking down at my phone again. "It's 12:05 am."

"Oh fuck," John murmured, looking back at me anxiously, I could tell just by glancing at him that he wanted to leave. "C'mon, let's go," I began to walk again, John silently followed me as we reached the town. Almost nobody was outside, therefore most of the stores were completely off and the sound of two cars is heard in the silence; it felt like a ghost town.

We walked without saying a word, only appreciating our company until I broke the silence. "You know, out of the couple times I've gone to Nancy's, I've never seen you. Did you just start working there?"

"Yeah, Mom wanted me to get a job and that's the only place where they'd actually accept me, I guess," John answered. "Or at least, that's the only job that I applied for."

I laughed a little, my cheeks hurting from smiling.

Then we were silent again once we reached the small complex of apartments along the street, I could tell he's never been here before; we stopped in front of the entrance where a tall fence stood.

"Will I see you again? Back at the diner, I mean."

"Depends on when you want me there, honey," I said, winking at him as he silently smiled but I noticed the small tint of blush on his cheeks, however, I didn't mention it.

"Here, I have an idea," I remarked, pulling out a napkin and crayon from the diner. "Does it involve you giving me your number?"

"Yes it does, what I charmer I am. Right?" I said jokingly, handing him the napkin. "Whenever you wanna see me, when your shift is over or whatever, call me. Not like I'm busy."

"Hey, when your Dad called, why'd you tell him that you were alone?"

"Eh, just a habit. He assumes whenever I'm out with somebody, I end up doing drugs but I don't."

"Oh, well. I'll chat with you soon, Cam. Thanks for the adventure," John said as he stepped back.

"Au revoir," I spoke in French while bowing down fancily, listening to Johns giggle as he walked away.

I forgot the code to get inside the complex so I just hopped over the fence, my mind still thinking about John.

I just wish I hadn't gotten attached so quickly.

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1908 WORDS.

[throughtheglassdarkly]

Missing Pieces, part 7

Hello, lovelies, it’s me, Yova. I know our darling Derek typically recounts our motley’s mishaps. However, our poor chronicler was called away for a bridal cupcake catastrophe just before our date with Day’s former partner and lucky you, I’ve graciously offered to help with this part of the story.

Pam, Bella, and I dropped Derek on his feathered head in front of Sprinkles (not that one) and then picked up Officer Break for lunch. We were not sure where to go for lunch; mostly we were too busy trying to figure out how to handle Brenda. Pam, though, ever resourceful, found a quaint out-of-the-way spot. One of those places that does breakfast and lunch and closes by four in the afternoon.

I had texted Marigold about Officer Break’s ability to see us as we are and what, if any, court prcedents needed to be observed. But I did not hear back from her straight away. Unsurprising, really. There’s no cell signal in the Autumn Court’s Hallow.

Lunch was, for lack of a better term, awkward. Officer Break was practically brimming with excitement, while the three of us were completely unsure of how to broach the subject of Changeling society as a whole. I started with gently explaining what we were, for Officer Break had taken to calling us the Weird Folk. Then an explanation of Arcadia and the process by which a human became a Changeling and escaping back through the Hedge. In all honesty, Brenda took it all in stride. She kept nodding thoughtfully when appropriate, then she asked something that floored us all: “My partner is stuck there. How do I get him back?”

Day does not deserve this woman.

She was not pleased when we told her she couldn’t, nor should she try to find her way back into the Hedge. She was unaware of how lucky she was, but she would not let go of the idea of saving Day from the Gentry’s clutches, especially after she had come into contact with his Fetch. This put us in a bit of a conundrum, as we of course knew what had befallen Day. However, we were not sure what Officer Break would do to Day, given his crimes. Also, out of deference to Day, we tried our hardest to not let her know that we knew him.

Thankfully, when she asked that question, we were able to realize she really did see Day through rose-colored glasses. We were able to talk Officer Break out of storming the Hedge by offering to help her find Day’s Fetch and she agreed to meet us later that evening at the Biergarten.

After lunch, the ladies and I piled back into my truck and talked about the issue at hand, and how we were going to get Day to come along and face his former partner. Thankfully, Day is a man tied to his vices. So, one stop at the liquor store for two packs of Marlboro Reds and a big bottle of Wild Turkey later, we arrived at his flat.

He was afraid we had brought Brenda with us and tried to pass himself off as an old lady, but opened the door at the promise of booze and smokes. Day lives, as you might expect, surrounded by his own filth. There was a sandwich on the counter that I swore was about to grow limbs and start talking soon. I gave him the cigarettes but withheld the booze as I let Pam explain our plan to meet Brenda later.

Day, of course, at first refused to come along if Officer Break was going to be there. I did understand – it is hard to face someone who admires you so much and not want to disappoint them or admit you aren’t worthy of their admiration. The fact that she could see through our masks was another factor to consider. All perfectly reasonable reasons to not face her.

But we were not going to let him weasel out of it. Between Pam’s motherly guilt trip, Bella’s cuteness, my scathing honesty, and the bottle of Wild Turkey on the line, Day relented. While he was in the midst of over-fretting, Marigold returned my text. Typically, she observes all grammar rules when texting. But this time, what I got was all caps “HEDGE TOUCHED” followed by four exclamation points. I could feel her excitement through the phone and messaged her back, asking what that meant. What she told me is that apparently even passing through the Hedge leaves its mark, though the courts hadn’t seen a Hedge-Touched human in a long time. She asked to interview Brenda. It was adorable.

Once Day had agreed to come, we left him to grumble and make himself presentable for that evening (otherwise no Wild Turkey). I dropped Bella and Pam off at Derek’s workplace as Pam hoped to lend a hand and I believe Bella wanted a free cupcake. I personally went home to decompress and change my outfit. And here, lovelies, I will hand you back to our chronicler, as not long after this he was freed from cupcake hell.

Hey, it’s me again. And when she says “cupcake hell,” she’s not joking. All I got on my phone was a panicked text from my boss, “BRIDEZILLA: ALL HANDS ON DECK” and I had to show up. When I got there, I barely managed to duck a flying tray of absolutely lovely chocolate cupcakes that had been piped and decorated to perfection. A very angry woman and a man with a long-suffering look on his face were at the counter and she was shrieking, “I ASKED FOR MARBLE CUPCAKES, NOT CHOCOLATE AND VANILLA CUPCAKES, AND THIS FROSTING IS CLEARLY MAGENTA WHEN I ASKED FOR FUCHSIA, DO I LOOK LIKE A WHORE TO YOU?!”

So that was my next five hours (also: I checked the order form and she clearly selected two different types of cupcakes. Bitch.). Thankfully, Pam showed up and added an extra set of hands while Bella helped herself to a few of the three hundred cupcakes the team at work had previously made. That evening, after artfully designing chocolate dicks into three hundred marble cupcakes, I joined the rest of the motley at the Biergarten. Brenda was there well before us and was waiting at an outside table, looking between her phone and a notebook. It about took all of Pam’s, Bella’s, and my strength to shove Day up the walk toward the restaurant.

Yova started trying her usual bullshitting and schmoozing with Brenda, who called her on it and said she didn’t need to get awkward. “Well, it’s about to get even more awkward,” Yova told her as the three of us pushed Day around the corner. “Remember how we were loath to talk about your partner earlier? It’s because it wasn’t our place to tell,” Yova said, stepping aside and motioning for Day to step up.

Day greeted her about as awkwardly as humanly possible: “Hey, girl, how’s tricks?” She put her notebook and phone away, took in a deep breath, pinched the bridge of her nose and said, “Day, I swear to fucking Christ,” as she walked up to him. Her hands balled into fists at her side and she just stared up at him, taking him in. After maybe thirty seconds of staring in silence, she raised a fist and placed it firmly in the middle of his chest. “You have some balls making me worry about you like that,” she said. “Well, if I didn’t, it wouldn’t be me,” he said. She shook her head and admitted that she was completely unprepared for this. “Look, I’m not saying that what happened that day when we were looking for Pam was totally uncool, but I mean, in my defense, what was I supposed to do? I was stuck. I became this… thing,” he said.

Brenda closed her eyes and said, “It’s my fault. I was the one who brought you out there. I’ve been beating myself up for this pretty much ever since it happened.” “Well, uh, I… forgive you?” he said. “That wasn’t very convincing, but I’ll take it. It’s pretty much more than I’ve ever gotten out of you, so I’ll take it,” she retorted. He told her that he’d accepted what he’d become and suggested they leave it at that and move on.

We told Brenda about how we were planning to investigate Day’s Fetch and asked her what she knew about him. She told us that about two weeks after Day disappeared, the Fetch just showed up to work one day, with no clue what had happened and what people knew, and they tried to arrest it, which didn’t work. She kept digging around, looking for the Fetch, and found out where it would usually go and who it liked to run with. She said it was trying to keep a low profile until it started paying the rest of us a visit. “Okay, I guess I get all that, but why were you trying to look for me?” Day asked. “Because you’re my partner. Well, were. I’ve got a new one now. But partners are supposed to have each other’s backs and I know you always thought I was annoying or naïve, but, you know, I did learn a lot from you. And I know that somewhere inside that callused, possibly cholesterol-soaked heart, there’s still something there. And I – I dunno. I thought maybe I could bring back that part of you that still actually believed in the job.”

Day told her that there was one thing they’d have to clear up before they went any further: “Everything they said I did, it’s all true. I did plant evidence, I did fudge paperwork. I didn’t always follow proper procedure, because those were the types of people who game the system to get away with it. We were never going to get them. So, I did what I had to do to put those sons of bitches away for life. And if you ask me if I was gonna do it again, the answer’s yes. So if you can understand that and accept it, then we’re square. But if you can’t, I don’t know.” Brenda admitted she’d noticed some of the things Day had been doing, even if she didn’t know the lengths to which he’d gone. “I’m good at my job and can tell when things aren’t right. I know you can do good things. Maybe right now you’re not doing a good job at doing those things, but I know you can, and I’m patient enough. I can wait until you realize that yourself.”

While this was going on, Yova and I were whispering to each other. “I think Day’s tiny little heart grew three sizes this day,” she told me. “Maybe, but three times zero is still zero,” I said.

We decided to make our way inside the biergarten and look around for anything that seemed out of place. Brenda talked with the bouncer for a few minutes and flashed her detective’s badge. She waved us over and the bouncer let us in without IDing any of us, even Bella, who looks 17 if she’s a day. The first thing I noticed about the bar is that there were peanut shells everywhere: buckets and buckets of peanuts set out and people chawing on them and tossing the shells wherever. Bella got instantly lost in the France-Brazil game. There were college kids cheering and older people drinking. We even saw a couple of other changelings sitting at the bar itself. They were obviously super drunk and obnoxious, yelling curses whenever a player fucked up.

Our group managed to snipe a table as another group got ejected for being too rowdy and we ordered some food and drinks. Over the noise, Brenda told us that she was surprised we picked this spot to go to, since it was one of the spots Day’s Fetch tended to hang. “Near as I can figure it, we wait for him and his crew to show up and see what we can do,” Day said. Yova told her our original reason to come there was to suss out who the loyalist was and we were quickly realizing there was probably some overlap between those two groups. When there was a moment of calm, Yova put on her most charming smile and asked Brenda for a favor: “My girlfriend would very much like to interview you.” Being helpful, I said with no small amount of grinning, “You said the G word.” “She did!” Bella piped up. Yova gave us both a look a death but Brenda hesitantly agreed to talk to Marigold and we started to eat.

While the others were noshing and drinking, I kept an eye on our surroundings and managed to spot that the two obnoxious changelings at the bar had spotted us and they seemed to be paying more attention to us than to the game. One of them was a very large moss-covered man and the other was a smaller woman with buzz-cut hair, grayish skin and cat-slitted eyes. “We got eyes on us at 2:00,” I said. Day suggested we talk to them and see what they were up to. “Probably the least-threatening one of us should go talk to them,” Yova suggested, and we all turned to look at Pam.

Pam got up to go talk to them, convincing Bella to go along with her. She tried to be friendly, extending a hand and introducing herself. The woman looked at her with a “really?” expression. Bella tried talking sports with them and the mossy man actually opened up a bit. The woman finally shook Pam’s hand and Pam tried to get them to join us at our table. As they packed up and started to walk over, I heard a buzz from a few tables away over the din. When I turned to look, I spotted a small figure in a Brazil hoodie pick up a phone. I couldn’t tell anything about who it was other than that they were short and slender. But the timing of the buzz seemed to be just a little too perfect.

I nudged Yova and motioned with my head to the figure. She grabbed an empty glass off the table and made her way toward the bar, not necessarily walking straight toward the Brazil hoodie but taking a path that looked like she was weaving around people. She tried to get a view of who was in the hoodie. She couldn’t get a clear look at the person’s face but she could see that she was wearing a skirt and was texting like mad.

Pam got the other changelings to sit down at our table and the woman introduced herself as Deb and her compatriot as Greg. She said that they didn’t see a lot of other changelings around, which is why they were staring. We hadn’t seen them at any of the freehold events, but given how large the freehold was, that wasn’t too surprising. We all introduced ourselves and explained that we just got back. Greg kept trying to engage Bella in soccer talk while Deb said the two of them didn’t do the whole Court thing and asked if they could get back to their own spot. I couldn’t help but feel that her nervousness wasn’t really because of us: she seemed to be looking out in the street as she was talking to us.

At the bar, Yova was chatting up the bartender to see if she could get Day one of the giant birthday glass boots full of beer without putting it in an actual glass boot. “My friend is lovely, but awfully clumsy, even when sober,” she tried to explain. While she was doing this, she tried to keep her eye on hoodie chick and see if she was still watching us. The girl in the hoodie got up and started walking past Yova. Yova took that opportunity to step back and right into her path, bumping into her. As she stumbled, Yova got a quick glimpse of her face: she was a pretty young woman with tan skin and wavy dark hair. She looked familiar, but Yova wasn’t sure why. She pulled the hood over her face a little more and made a beeline for the exit.

Yova got back to the table, put a beer in front of Day and told us she was going outside to smoke, asking if any of us wanted to join her. I’d been keeping an eye on the hoodie chick and saw her interaction with Yova, so I volunteered to step out with her, as did Brenda. Pam decided to lock Deb into a conversation about her kids. She was forcing Deb to be an active listener and it was awful. Outside, Brenda asked us what we were doing. Yova quickly explained the situation and Brenda volunteered to go take a look for the girl in the hoodie. After she’d been gone a minute, we decided it would be smarter for us to go after her.

Back at the table, Deb got a text and tried to put it away before Pam could see, but Pam got a glimpse: “I can’t shake the cop.” Pam tried to ask her if someone was in trouble and Deb said, “No, we have to go. Greg, we’re going.” She grabbed Greg and tried to pull him out of the bar. Pam, bless her, managed to distract her long enough with discussions about Girl Scout cookies or something to delay her a bit. After Deb and Greg got out the door and dashed, Pam, Day, and Bella hurried out after us. Day ran ahead of the other two and found me and Yova looking for Brenda. We waited until Pam and Bella caught up, then all of us made our way forward.

Eventually, we found Brenda outside of an in-process construction site. She looked annoyed but also determined. She told us to keep our voices down and that the chick in the hoodie went into the site. She said she wanted to go in there but knew it was a bad idea, so Day helpfully volunteered the rest of us to go in there. He reached down, scooped up a mud patty and spat it over his hands to make rock fists. Brenda looked at him with mild disgust, saying, “That is so in character. I don’t know what you did. But it is absolutely you.”

We decided that somebody needed to go in and do some recon. Day nominated me. Brenda rolled her eyes and pointed out that aside from Yova, the walking strobe light, I was the most brightly colored one there. “It’s okay, he’s been trying to get me killed ever since we got pulled into Arcadia.” “Whaaaat? Come on, bird brain!” Day told me. “No! I’m not talking to you after you befouled my wastebasket!” I snapped. Bella volunteered to go in and poofed out of existence. The last thing we heard as she wandered off is, “I’m going to do this while looking better than any of you.” Yova and I looked at each other. “She’s going to get herself killed,” she said. “Yeah, but when she does, at least we won’t have to put up with her any longer,” I said.

Bella slipped into the construction site and up to the second floor. She was able to hear mumbled voices coming from within a tarped area. One was a feminine voice and the other was a much deeper, masculine one. The deeper voice said that they had to get out of there and he wasn’t staying put in the construction site for another night. “Well, at least we’ve got to stay put until we’re sure they’re gone,” the feminine voice said. “I’ve had it up the here. Just shut up and let me think,” the masculine voice responded. There was a tense and awkward silence between them and Bella slipped back out and made her way back to us.

Now this next part, I need to explain. Bella has a tendency when she slips out of sight to want to surprise people by coming up behind them and saying things. It freaks the hell out of you. And we were already on edge because of what was going on. So when I heard a voice behind me, with no context and no warning, saying, “I found something,” you’ll understand why I turned around and decked Bella right in the face. I didn’t hit her hard, but enough to make a point. “Ow, you asshole!” she yelled. “Oh, it’s you!” I said, feigning surprise. As I saw her stumble back, I felt something really off, like I was losing a little bit of myself. You might remember a few chapters back, I told you how if we Beasts lash out without thinking, it can cause us to lose a little Clarity, the part of us that helps us determine where Arcadia and the real world differ. I was able to take a deep breath and focus, but that moment definitely made an impact.

Bella told us that the two people in there were trying to mimic her and Day. We quickly decided our best course of action was to go in and beat the ever-loving shit out of the Fetches. Pam and Brenda kept watch outside while the other four of us slipped in. We almost all managed to be stealthy. Almost all of us. Yova stubbed her toe on a piece of plywood. She cursed and it bumped into the scaffolding, making a rattling noise. We came to a stop and I whispered that maybe we could be quiet and they’d think it was just a stray cat or something. “Oh, sure, that always works,” Day snapped. “Fuck off!” I hissed.

While we were bickering, Yova and Bella heard the sound of heavy footsteps coming from the floor above. Bella dropped into the shadows and Yova shimmied up a ladder, peeking over the top and spotting Day’s Fetch looking pissed as hell and holding a firearm. She called out, “Hello!” and flared her brightness to blind him. He stumbled back, yelling, “What the hell?!”

Outside, Pam spotted the flash from the second floor and clearly recognized it as Yova’s, but she also saw a secondary flash from a couple of floors up. She pointed that out to Brenda and Brenda gave her a pair of binoculars, which Pam used to look up. The angle wasn’t great because it was so high up, but Pam managed to see a figure we knew very well stepping close to the edge of one of the rafters, walking carefully across it, and trying to make her way to a piece of scaffolding leading down: that bitch-ass Aurora. Pam explained to Brenda who Aurora was and they made a quick plan for Brenda to tail Aurora and text Pam if she was getting close.

Back inside, Yova decked Day’s Fetch as he charged her, whaling him smack in the nose. As Day, Bella and I heard the fight break out, we also heard someone else coming up from the basement. Day directed us to go up and help Yova, while he charged at the noise, only to see Pam, who told him about Aurora and Brenda tailing her. He told her to stay close to him and they followed us up to the second story. Around this time, Day’s Fetch ran forward, tackling Yova over onto the edge of the scaffolding. Day jumped down onto the scaffolding, trying to pull his Fetch off of Yova. He didn’t quite get it off of her but did manage to loosen its grip a bit. He pulled his Fetch up and got a solid look at him, which he later admitted shook him quite a bit.

Yova let out an unholy shriek, chilling all of us, and she started glowing bright red, going full battle bard. Day’s Fetch didn’t let go, but it was clearly second-guessing its choice in opponent. Around this time, Bella’s Fetch made its way down and saw regular Bella. It had a hammer and glared at Bella, yelling, “This life isn’t yours anymore. Get out!” It charged and got Bella in the shoulder with the hammer, which looked like it hurt like the dickens. Around this time, I charged forward with a flying kick, getting Bella’s Fetch in the back of the neck. It went down hard, dropping the hammer and holding up its hands, surrendering.

Bella was seething with anger, looking at her Fetch, but seeing her own face in pain was making her second-guess things a bit. As much as she was reeling, she picked up the hammer. “You took everything from me! And even now, you’re still trying to take it from me!” she said. “I didn’t have a choice! No, please, just hear me out! We didn’t have a choice! We didn’t have a choice to exist! I’ll leave here if you promise not to kill me. The only reason I’m here is I don’t want to lose what I have. It’s not just the things that used to be yours,” the Fetch begged. Bella had about as dead serious a look as I’ve ever seen on her face as she said, “Yeah, well, I didn’t have a choice, either.” She turned to look at me and I gave her a slight nod. She turned back, she brought the hammer up and slammed it into her Fetch’s temple as hard as she could.

The Fetch went down, twitching and barely breathing. Bella didn’t’ stop. She hit it over and over and over again with the hammer until she finally stopped, sobbing. I went in and hugged her tightly. She told me later she felt like something was slipping away as she was watching her own body reverting to a pile of greasy rags stitched together with uneven, stained thread. We both watched as shadows seeped out from the tatters and flowed into the night.

Bella was clearly not in any state to do anything more and I wasn’t going to leave her by herself, but the fight kept going on around us. While Bella was dispatching her Fetch, Pam got a text from Brenda: “She’s doing something, I can’t tell what. Staying still.” She decided to climb up to the fourth floor, where Brenda told her Aurora was making her way to. Yova punched Day’s Fetch into Day. It tried to break out of the hold that Day had on it, but Day had it tight.

“You’re not going anywhere, you beautiful son of a bitch,” Day said. “All right, you’ve got every right to be pissed, but I just want to get out of this city! The only reason I’m here is that white-haired bitch told me she’d get me out of here.” Day tightened the grip on its neck and said, “Nope, time’s up, you bastard. Just think happy thoughts." "Why do you gotta make it weird? No, scratch that. I know exactly why you’re making it weird,” the Fetch sighed. Day squeezed hard and we all heard popping and breaking as he squeezed the air out of it. Once it passed out, Day dropped it. He looked over at Yova and asked, “So, how was it with me on top of you?” She looked at him and decked him hard enough where he got whiplash. And I felt every single part of me burning with the glee that comes from being a master of the petty arts.

Those of us who weren’t busy being petty, rage-fueled, smarmy, or weepy (read: Pam) climbed up to the fourth floor and saw Aurora gathering a few items – nothing that seemed terribly important, but if she was putting them together, they obviously were. Aurora was placing them in the moonlight and starting to dance around them. Pam called forth a broom made out of wind to scatter the items and Aurora started freaking out. Pam kept her cool, telling her that she thought she’d help Aurora clean up her mess. “Well. My guess is you’ve already killed my babies. So…” and with that, Aurora ran straight for the edge of the building and dove off. After a minute, Pam realized she didn’t hear her land.

Down on the second floor, I happened to be looking in the right direction as I saw a flash: it looked like a hole opened up and a white blur fell through it, then was gone. “Uh, guys? I don’t think we’re catching her tonight,” I said.

The rest of the night was anticlimax. Yova managed to get a grip and collect herself. Pam came down from the fourth floor. Day popped his nose back into place. Bella was staring at her hands and generally being a space cadet. I didn’t want to leave Bella alone in that state, so I stuck by her, making sure she wasn’t going to do anything crazy. Yova suggested that we get in touch with the Knights of the Widows’ Walk and let them know they could come and pick up Day’s Fetch. We found some zip ties and restrained Day’s Fetch and Day slung it over his shoulder and we turned to go.

As we were getting ready to go, I saw a small glint from the moonlight shining on the pile of rags. I knelt down and picked it up: it was a small silver ring with a pink heart-shaped stone and smaller diamonds around it. I took one look at Bella and realized she was not in any state of mind to think about what that might mean, so I pocketed it and decided to ask her about it after she was back to being her old self.

We headed out of the construction site to see Brenda waiting for us. “Mission accomplished?” she asked. “Let’s just say we didn’t lose,” Day said. Brenda took a look at Bella, who wasn’t looking at much of anything, then looked back at Day. “I’m really, really glad you’re okay,” she told him. He told her that she could come see him and they could hang out. “Sure, just not at your place,” she said. “What’s wrong with my place?” he asked. She griped about how the one time she went over to his place and practically caught scabies. “It hasn’t changed,” Yova said. Brenda shook her head and said, “You know what, I’ve changed my mind. I will come over and help you clean up and get the place up to the health code.”

We piled into Yova’s truck and stopped by the drop box, leaving a message for the Knights, then went off to get some much-deserved rest. And that’s where I’ll end it for now. Next time, I’ll get you some resolution about the whole loyalist situation, I promise. Until then, may you have the reflexes of a freaked-out secretary bird whenever you encounter a Bridezilla.

A big thank you to Yova’s player, @basically-andromeda, for writing her part of the recap!

[cosmosogler]

hmm. i didn’t sleep well last night even with the podcast. maybe had the wrong volume. and i woke up for the last time at about 7 with a cramp in my leg and that was pretty bad. then i just laid there on my back for 25 minutes until my alarm went off and then i got up.

i was kinda hoping that biking for an hour would exhaust me. i guess i am an endless well of energy. trickle by trickle i always got what i need for physical stamina. sometimes.

that’s been true for a long time. mom and dad always complained that i had no pain tolerance. and i can’t sprint forever, sure. but this is basically the longest/hardest i’ve ever biked aside from that ride downhill along the glacier in alaska, but that really hurt my wrists for like a week afterward. i always feel tired, the whole time, but i never really... stop. i guess that’s a suitable metaphor for my life.

mom and dad complain about a lot of things about me that probably aren’t true. but... i don’t really have a standard to compare their comments to. i’ve talked about that before... i don’t have a good feel for my personality. i’m unsure of the decisions i might make when under pressure and i don’t like that. it’s not like i feel like i’m nothing. i feel like i’m everything.

and the comments about me, to my face? are also everything. and the comments about me when they think i’m not around. also everything.

but i never feel like i’m acting different than how i normally act!!! what gives? which is it? am i cold or warm? am i deeply intelligent or deeply stupid? i make some pretty stupid decisions. being a physicist doesn’t make me smart automatically.

am i honest or two-faced? am i egotistical and too good to interact with other people or do i have no self esteem? 

in some cases i can be both in different situations, sure, i accept that people act differently sometimes. but i can’t be everything all the time. some of these comments happen on the same day.

sometimes i’ll think i am being perfectly reasonable and people will laugh at me for getting so worked up and i don’t understand because i was using my normal voice. maybe i was annoyed? but not upset by any measure. i’m getting that a lot now... jennica always laughs and says “that sounded REALLY sarcastic” when i say stuff like “i think the fire brigade is cool, my brother wants to be a firefighter and i want to be supportive.” 

i don’t know what her game is there. i don’t know why she keeps saying that. sometimes she puts her hands over her mouth like i said something monstrous when i am having a conversation with another classmate. she doesn’t come across as doing it on purpose. but now she is introducing me to her family members as “this is sammie, i can never tell if she’s being sarcastic or not” and i either have to try to smile through the pain and say “nice to meet you” and hear jennica say “SEE!?” or make an openly sassy comment about the conversation i’m having with my classmates at the bar.

i guess there’s more than two options of course. there are infinite ways to follow up an introduction. 

man i haven’t even described the day i am having today. 

i got up and showered and had a bowl of cereal for breakfast. i waited for suzanne to leave home to get to the book convention, then i waited another ten minutes, then i biked over. it took like six minutes to get there so it wasn’t a big deal even though my butt cried every time i hit a crack in the sidewalk.

no bike lane on main street. that’s why i was on the sidewalk.

i got to the warehouse and asked where everyone was in the group chat. then i went inside and looked at some books. i picked five out fairly quickly- i was only allowing myself to get 4 or 5. i got a mark twain humor theory thing, a biography of mary poppins’ author, a compilation of african mythologies, a big collection of king arthur stories, and a compilation of southwestern native american fairy tales. 

i found jennica by the mythology shelf. i asked her why she didn’t tell me she was here when i asked where everyone was. she shrugged and then tried to convince me that the brothers grimm fairy tales were the originals and also the best thing ever because they were so dark and brutal. 

it occurs to me in retrospect that she probably doesn’t know very much about me or my interests or how many hours i’ve put into studying world mythology. 

(not as many as i’d like, but more than she thinks.)

i paid for my books and then found suzanne’s fiance jake in the parking-lot-turned-courtyard. he’s not in the group chat so i wasn’t mad or anything that time. he let me sit by him and we talked about the book he’d found- “beyond the human eye” i think it was called. it had microscopic and telescopic images and looked like it weighed 20 pounds. i know he’s super antisocial, but he seemed to not be bothered by the one-on-one conversation. maybe that’s mostly a “party with people he doesn’t know” situation. i don’t know him very well yet. we seem to have a lot in common though.

eventually he mentioned that he’d found a pokemon book and thought of me. he asked if i wanted to see it. before i could register the information i’d said “sure” so we were back in the entrance. i made finger guns at the security guard because i’d asked kind of dazed questions the first time i went in and he was reasonably patient with me. we left our backpacks by him at his request.

we didn’t find the book but that was ok. when we went back outside we found suzanne, who had brought rebika, adamya, and her brother alex. then ioannis showed up. jake told suzanne that we’d been looking for the pokemon book and i cut in with “i don’t even play it around you guys that much i don’t know why you associate pokemon with me.”

suzanne looked at me like i was high. she said i play it all the time. i play for 5-10 minutes a day to do the daily stuff, but this week i had been playing it more because i was stressed... i told her it was a good way to feel accomplished because it’s only a matter of “doing the thing a lot” in order to get the thing i want.

in retrospect i think i was resetting for that jolly marshadow for like 25 minutes while hanging out with them last saturday. but i do mostly play at home and not particularly at the office.

anyway i hung out for a while and then we went to get brunch at a cafe across town. i looked at jennica, who was driving me and ioannis, and i said “it’s way easier to appreciate how fast a car is once you’ve had to walk or bike the same distance.” we basically drove the same exact path i’d used to get home last night.

we were at the cafe until like 1:45... mostly talking about etymology. i was a little antsy about the time, just because i had a lot of things to do today (i was right to be worried). we ogled some vultures hanging out by a lake and i took a bunch of pictures because there were like 30 of them sitting around. then half of us went shopping while the other half either got driven home or back to the warehouse to grab our bikes. i was already exhausted.

i got back to the apartment just in time to grab my box from amazon before the office closed. snoopy’s cat walk-through brush was in there! i set it up and sprinkled some catnip on it like i was feeding some fish. within two minutes snoopy was rolling around under it so i watched her do that for a while. she really loves it. i can never quite get her chin the right way when i brush her so now she can do it however she wants.

instead of cleaning the apartment i watched youtube videos for a while. eventually i took a deep breath and called the crisis center. they can’t make recommendations and told me to ask my insurance, which is the opposite of what i wanted to do. i scrolled through google instead. there’s no one near me except one solitary therapist with no reviews or information. i did eventually find that she doesn’t take my insurance so i called a different one who is kind of nearby but also didn’t have any reviews or information except for a phone number. i left a message. if she’s not open on saturdays i might be in trouble though.

also the crisis center doesn’t do appointments on saturdays so that was out too.

i might have to just use my 12-ish allotted appointments with the on-campus counseling center... i didn’t really want to do that because it takes like 3 appointments to get established and then i’d just have to do this search all over again after the 12 meetings were up.

then i made myself some dinner. it wasn’t that great. it needed another dish to complement it but i really didn’t have the energy to make rice or anything.

after that i biked out to the grocery store... at like 6:30. i got everything i needed and i think i stayed within my budget? i got some halloween decorations for my window. and now it’s finally the time of year when it looks like i am being festive instead of having a random wooden skeleton hanging on my wall over the keyboard piano.

he keeps an eye on snoopy while i’m out.

biking home was a nightmare with the cat litter in the front basket throwing off the center of gravity. i had to carry TWO heavy bags on my shoulders instead of one and it was cutting off the blood supply to my arms. still kind of sore where the handle straps were digging into my skin.

after i got home i put everything away and STILL didn’t feel like cleaning the apartment so i...? not sure what i did. a bunch of different little insignificant things. looking through tumblr i guess.

i realized that none of my classmates know that i draw or write. it feels like it should be such a big part of me and yet... i just don’t talk about it. i don’t have much time to draw. i make time sometimes but i dunno. i don’t show them anything. i don’t think anyone even saw the “sunset” representation i drew during our lab introduction when the lecturer was describing how we use symbols and stuff. i talked about that several weeks ago. how she remembered mine and said it was unique i guess.

i started a short story that i was gonna write about someone else’s character, and i still have the general outline in my head, but... i guess the idea feels stupid. it’s really hard to write my characters these days. i don’t know how much emphasis to put on them when other people’s characters are also in the story. i always feel like they are stealing the spotlight. in stories that are written about them. yeah.

i wish... i had a better way to tell what people knew about me. like the pokemon thing genuinely surprised me. this has happened a lot. people say i talk about it constantly, all the time, but like... i dunno. i only remember bringing it up once a week at most in undergrad, just in little references. like “oh there’s an event this week.” 

i guess it might be because i’m not very self aware? am i? i sure feel self conscious. is that different from self aware? 

i make everything about myself. i have to remind myself that i write these for me first and that’s why they are long all-consuming black holes of talking about myself. because otherwise it feels like i’m the only thing i ever talk about. i can’t... share... most of the things i like or am interested in. it feels like. i know i talk about the things i like all the time. is that still talking about myself? i’m so confused.

i’m really struggling to figure out how to not talk about myself all the time. being stuck in a house with mom and dad for eight and a half months was probably not very good for my conversational ability. i don’t know how to talk about anything other than myself because i spent eight months doing nothing but living inside my own head and sometimes walking my dogs. i don’t have anything to talk about! i was my whole life for so long that i forget how to... not. i feel like i don’t focus on other people enough.

ha. that’s another thing. my old friends used to say that they thought their friendships with me were real one-sided because i would share my problems overwhelmingly and not listen to them. then i go to therapy and the therapist is like “people aren’t your friends because you don’t share anything about yourself and expect them to share everything.” 

WHICH IS IT??? WHICH??????? NOT BOTH!!!!!!!!

GOD! I REALLY STRUGGLE WITH MY RELIGION, OK? I FEEL LIKE I SHOULD COMMIT MORE TO A BUDDHIST LIFESTYLE BUT I CAN’T SEEM TO FORCE MYSELF TO AND I WORRY THAT THAT MAKES IT CULTURAL APPROPRIATION OR SOMETHING BECAUSE OH I’M FAKE BUDDHIST, I JUST WEAR IT AS A FASHION STATEMENT, I DON’T ACTUALLY PRACTICE BUT BELIEVE ME I REALLY AM PART OF THAT RELIGION. BELIEVING IN GOD WAS SO HARD EVEN UP UNTIL HIGH SCHOOL. I FELT LIKE GOD HATED ME AND HAD TO TELL MYSELF EVERY DAY THAT HE WOULD UNDERSTAND EVERYONE HE MADE BECAUSE HE KNEW EVERYTHING. AND YET CONTINUOUSLY HORRIBLE THINGS WOULD HAPPEN TO ME AND PEOPLE I CARED ABOUT.

MY POLITICAL VIEWS ARE HARD TO DEFINE. I FEEL LIKE I DON’T HAVE A WORD FOR MY COLLECTION OF BELIEFS. I DON’T HAVE A GOOD IDEA OF WHAT FINANCIAL SYSTEM WOULD WORK BEST. ALL OF THEM SUCK!!!!!!!! AND I CAN’T FIX THAT PROBLEM!!!!!!!!! SO I DON’T THINK ABOUT IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! BECAUSE OTHERWISE IT STRESSES ME OUT AND MAKES ME MISERABLE LITERALLY ALL DAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I WORRY THAT ALL THIS “NICENESS” AND “KINDNESS” AND “SWEETNESS” THAT OTHER PEOPLE DESCRIBE ME AS HAVING IS FAKE. I’M NOT ACTUALLY KIND. ALL I CAN THINK ABOUT IS MYSELF AND HOW I WOULD FEEL IF I WAS IN THEIR SITUATION. WHAT ELSE AM I SUPPOSED TO THINK ABOUT??? I’M NOT ACTUALLY KIND BECAUSE I’M NOT BRAVE. I CAN’T STAND UP FOR OTHER PEOPLE WHEN THERE’S TOO MUCH RISK I WILL GET HURT. I CAN’T STAND UP FOR MYSELF WHEN THERE’S TOO MUCH RISK I’LL GET HURT!!!!!!! IS THAT VIRTUE SIGNALLING? DO I JUST WANT THE ATTENTION WITHOUT ACTUALLY MAKING A COMMITMENT? I DON’T KNOW!

AM I EVEN CAPABLE OF MAKING A COMMITMENT? I DON’T EVEN PRACTICE POKEMON BATTLES BEFORE I ENTER COMPETITIONS AND THEN I GET BUMMED WHEN I DON’T WIN HALF THE TIME! WHAT DID I EXPECT?????? YOU HAVE TO PRACTICE TO BE ANY GOOD AT ANYTHING AND I DON’T PRACTICE ANYTHING BECAUSE I SPEND ALL MY TIME DOING NOTHING BECAUSE I’M AFRAID IF I MOVE I WON’T BE ABLE TO STOP MYSELF FROM HURTING MYSELF. BECAUSE I HATE MYSELF!

AND I THINK VIDEO GAMES AND CARTOONS ARE REALLY COOL AND I LIKE TONS OF CHARACTERS AND THEY SHOW UP IN MY DREAMS BUT IT’S WEIRD BECAUSE MY BRAIN JUST KIND OF PICKS OUT RANDOM FACES FOR ROLES AND PERSONALITIES IT MAKES UP FOR THE PURPOSE OF THE DREAM SO IT’S NOT REALLY THAT CHARACTER IT’S JUST GOT THEIR MASK ON.

I STILL THINK YOSHI IS REALLY CUTE AND I LIKE USING HIM IN SMASH BROS BECAUSE I HAVE BEEN PLAYING AS HIM FOR 20 YEARS AND IT’S WHAT I’M GOOD AT. BUT I’M ALSO REALLY GOOD AT BOWSER SO IT’S OK RIGHT??? IT’S NOT NERDY RIGHT???????????

LOOK AT HOW MUCH I DON’T KNOW ABOUT ANIME, WHICH I ACTUALLY DO KNOW ABOUT, I’M NOT A NERD RIGHT??????????????? YOU CAN’T TELL THAT I’M FAKING IGNORANCE RIGHT??????????????????

I REALLY LIKE UNDERTALE AND I WILL LISTEN TO THE SOUNDTRACK AS MANY TIMES AS I WANT AND YOU CAN’T MAKE ME STOP BUT I STILL DIE INSIDE IF SOMEONE SEES MY YOUTUBE RECOMMENDATIONS AND SEES “RUINS EXTENDED.”

DO YOU KNOW HOW FASCINATING FILM THEORY IS? I DO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

THAT’S WHAT I THINK ABOUT! THERE! IT’S WRITTEN DOWN SOMEWHERE! BUT MAYBE YOU ALREADY KNEW ALL THIS BECAUSE I AM SUBCONSCIOUSLY TALKING ABOUT ALL OF THIS ALL THE TIME AND I DON’T ACTUALLY HAVE ANY SECRETS OR ANY CONTROL OVER WHAT I SAY OR DO OR WHAT PEOPLE THINK OR KNOW ABOUT ME! I DON’T HAVE ANY CONTROL OVER ANYTHING THAT HAPPENS AROUND ME OR TO ME! I’M JUST A REALLY NERDY LUMP WHO HAS NO SKILLS AND NO ACTUALLY GOOD QUALITIES! ONLY FAKE GOOD QUALITIES! I DON’T REMEMBER HOW TO CARE ABOUT OTHER PEOPLE AFTER I SPEND TIME AT HOME AND I HAVE TO AWKWARDLY RE-LEARN HOW TO BE CONCERNED IN FITS AND SURPRISED STARTS- OH! TAYLOR SEEMS TO ACTUALLY BE UPSET! MAYBE I SHOULD ASK IF HE’S OK??? IS THAT HOW YOU CARE ABOUT PEOPLE AGAIN??????????

I THINK I HAVE ALL THESE SECRETS BUT I DON’T! I DON’T HAVE ANYTHING! I CAN’T EVEN LIE RIGHT BECAUSE I CAN’T TELL IF I AM OR NOT ANY MORE!

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #478

“i get pretty just to fuck my face up”

If you were dying who would you say goodbye to first out of everyone? My mom. Are you someone who actually likes to babysit children? NO. Do you find any of your friends’ parents creepy or really mean? No. Do you have things on your mind right now? My weight is very, very much on my mind. I dared to weigh myself yesterday and I'm the heaviest I've ever been. So that's comforting. Are you at all stressed right now? ^^^^^^^ hunny I wanna pull all my hair out What was the last stuffed animal you bought? I don't know. What’s the last new good song that you discovered? "The Devil's Rejects" by Rob Zombie. I've been really into him lately. Felicity, Fiona, or Flavia? (with the “v” pronounced like a “w”–it’s Latin) "Felicity" is beautiful. I love the word in general. Which biblical name do you prefer: Naomi, Esther, Rachel, or Joanna? I love the name Naomi. Do you own a cowboy hat? No. Have you ever unfriended a sibling on social media? No; she unfriended me. Has someone let you down recently? My goddamn self. What are you looking forward to? Mom to get better so we can force ourselves back into the gym. Also Girt's mom to get better so we can see each other. For the weather to actually feel fall-ish. What’s your favorite Lady Gaga song? "Bad Romance." Skeletons or scarecrows? Skelly boiz What type of tree is the most common where you live? Oh, absolutely pine trees. Where did your last kiss take place? My living room. Name of your pet? Venus and Roman. How was your summer? Shitty. I hate summer. Do you miss anyone right now? I really miss Girt. Covid's gotta go. What size is your shirt? *feral hissing noises* Who was the last person you held hands with? Girt. Do you get out of bed on the left side or right side? Left, because I sleep mostly to the left. Do you like to be closer or farther back to the wheel when driving? Neither, I think? I haven't driven in so long that I'm not sure, but I'm quite sure I position myself pretty ideally. When eating dinner, do you eat foods in order or just inhale it? It's usually kind of in order, but occasionally I'll mix it up. When you lose your phone, where is the first general place you look? My bed. Do you fall asleep with your mouth open or closed? Usually closed. I tend to breathe through my nose unless I'm stuffy. What was the last bug you killed? An ant. Do you keep items in your front or back pants’ pocket? Front. What was the last item or location you cleaned? My glasses. Do you own a pet spider? No, but I REALLY want a number of tarantulas. :( The more time that passes, the more I want some, ha ha. I'd also love a jumping spider or two, but Mom won't allow even that. Have you ever gone on a cruise? No. Is there a rocking chair in your house? No. Have you ever been stood up? No. Do you like elevators or escalators? I'm scared of both. I'm afraid of getting stuck in an elevator, or falling down an escalator/tripping on one. Which do you prefer: M&M’s, Skittles, or Reese’s Pieces? Reese's Pieces, yum. If you could be the sidekick of a superhero which superhero would you pick? Uhhhh maybe Spider-Man, if I could web-sling too? lol Where on your body would you never get a tattoo? ... Can/do people get genitalia tattoos? Because I would fuckin never- Do you think that you could ever win a food eating contest? Hell no. I would puke. Honestly, have you ever thrown garbage out of the window of a car? Absolutely not. Never. What is the first song that comes to mind when I say: Michael Jackson? "Billie Jean." Which would you find more menacing: dinosaurs or dragons? Dragons are just dinos that can fly and breathe fire, so... you tell me which is more dangerous. I'd still try to befriend one tho lmao. Can you say “hello” in another language? Yeah; German is easy. It's just "hallo." Do you like licorice? NO omg Did anybody ever read bedtime stories to you when you were younger? Mom did. Do you have a favorite Johnny Depp movie? What is it? I really like his roles in Alice in Wonderland and Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. Were you ever force-fed as a child? My parents tried to enforce always finishing our plates. My mom is very against that now, considering the issues it can cause. Should kidneys or other organs be able to be bought and sold? No????? That's some black market bullshit for a reason. What is one of your most important rules when going on a date? Especially if it's your first date with a person, watch for red flags. Will children today have better or worse lives than their parents, and why? Well, it'll probably go in both ways depending on the topic. The environment is dying, the economy is horrific, but I'm sure there will be things like medical advancements. What's the most ironic thing you've seen happen? I dunno. Would you rather go ice skating or roller skating? Roller skating. The blades on ice skates scare me. How many different types of guns have you shot? (water, Nerf, real, etc) Uhhh just water and Nerf, I think? Which of the three meals a day are you most likely to skip? It's very unlikely you'll see me miss a meal... I don't handle the feeling of hunger well. What's something lots of people are afraid of, but you aren't? Snakes, some spiders, I don't THINK I'm scared of deep water, the dark... Do you know anyone who is tolerant of some on the LGBT spectrum but not all? Yes. Do open casket wakes freak you out? I've only been to one, as a child, when I didn't have a full grasp on death, so it was... oddly more fascinating to me, as weird as that sounds? I think going to one now, especially if it was someone close to me, it would make the wake more upsetting. When's the last time you slept in your parents' bed? No clue. What's something that will always be in fashion? Skinny jeans, checkered Vans... What "old person things" do you do? I regularly say "back in the day," lol. And I can go to sleep very early, like 7, but that's uncommon. I complain about soreness in my back and stuff. Do you live in the same hometown as where you were born? No. Did you dorm at college or commute from home? I commuted from home. Do you prefer the thin blue and white masks, or decorative ones? Well, who wouldn't prefer decorative ones? They're more personal to your interests and stuff and I feel is more encouraging to make people wear them. I however don't want to spend money on a mask, so I'm chill with just the blue surgical ones. Have you ever witnessed someone have a seizure before? My dog, yes. Have you ever rode on the back of a shopping cart, or a Home Depot dolly? Yeah, as a kid. Does everything you buy have to be organic? No. I don't buy the groceries, but I also don't care much about that. Do you support more small businesses or chain restaurants/stores? Habitually, chain ones. I wish I paid more attention to small businesses. Have you ever been crowned king or queen at a school dance? No. How old were you when you first started wearing a bra? Am I supposed to remember that? Are you more invested in computer games or video games? I don't care what the game is on; I can be equally invested in either. I prefer to play console games, though. Are you a fan of pumpkin spice everything? Noooo. I'm not a massive fan of it, actually. Is there any holiday that you don't decorate your house for? We only really decorate for occasionally Halloween and always Christmas. Mom may put up some Thanksgiving stuff. Tell me something your parents don't know about. They don't know certain places I've done sexual things at/on. What's the last table food you fed your pet? Roman doesn't get human food. He learned at a young age that's a no-no. Have you ever peed in the water at the beach? Ew, no. Even if it's incredibly vast, people still swim in that. Have you ever scored a winning goal for a team you played for? I doubt it. Have you ever participated in LARPing? No. Have you ever gotten a divorce? Never been married. Do you prefer "regular kissing" or French kissing? I mean that depends on the place and the mood. Are you more likely to give a hickey to someone else or get one? I haven't done that in many years, and when it happened, I don't think one of us did it more than the other. Do you like sprinkles on your ice cream? I HATE sprinkles. Have you been in more car accidents as a passenger or a driver? I've only ever been in an accident as a passenger. Have you ever been wrongfully convicted of a crime? No. Was any of the cafeteria food at your school actually any good? I actually didn't mind a good number of things. Have you ever wanted to become a lifeguard? No. What's the highest fever you've ever had? I'm unsure, but over 100. Have you ever kissed a dog on the mouth? Well, dogs have kissed ME on the mouth. al;sdkfjalksdjkf so gross When you were born was the umbilical cord wrapped around your neck? Uh, I don't believe so. I feel like I would know that if I was. Would you enter a burning building to save a kitten? I feel like I would, I think. My intense love of animals would probably force me to kick into action. Matthew, Mark, Luke, or John? Haaaa, I have a bias for "Mark," of course... but if we're talking which name I find most appealing, it's probably John. Or Luke. Have you ever been told that you talk too much? As a child, yes. Do you like to clean? Does ANYBODY enjoy it? Do you know of anyone who went into labor at the baby shower? Uh yikes. No. When's the last time you did a hand game with someone? (ie: Mary Mack) Probably not since I was little. Do you know anyone who was not born in a hospital, unexpectedly? No. Does anyone you know have dual citizenship to live in multiple countries? Possibly? Do you still have a landline phone/phone number? No. Name a fad that was popular when you were growing up, that you miss. Oh, I KNOW there's some things, but I don't recall right now. Have you ever gotten to milk a cow or a goat? No. I'm not sure I'd want to.

[chrismaverickdotcom]

Holes in the Sky... and the plot (a very late Ghostbusters review)

When Ghostbusters(2016) came out, I actually wanted to go see it and review it, but I happened to be busy that week and it bombed so hard that it was basically gone the next week, so I never got around to it. However yesterday I made a comment comparing the reviews of it to my fears about the reviews on the new  Wonder Woman movie (more on this in a bit) and a few people told me they really liked it and it was really good. My friend Brian, in particular, said “you should totally watch it and write a review like immediately!” Turns out it’s on Starz right now, and I was spending last night working on my comic strip anyway. I don’t usually do movie reviews of non-new releases. Or at least I haven’t yet. But it was Brian’s birthday yesterday… so you know what… Happy Birthday, Brian… here’s your review.

So uh…. SPOILERS… I guess… not really…  (I’ll get to this too).

One of my biggest problems with Ghostbusters when it came out was the lack of fair reviews. No one seemed to care about the movie. They cared about feminism. Both good and bad. What I mean is most of the chatter I saw about it came in two types: 1) “This is stupid. This is the worst movie ever. Why can’t chicks stick to their own movies. Why can’t they just stick to their own crap chick flicks and stay away from dude stuff! This is the worst movie ever!” or 2) “This is an important movie for women! We need more roles for strong women actors! If you hate this you hate women! Best movie ever!” What I didn’t see much of was the one thing I really wanted to see… “was this a good MOVIE?”

So I watched it. And the answer is… it’s not. It’s also not a bad movie. It doesn’t really deserve praise or derision. It falls pretty much exactly in the realm of what is quickly becoming one of my favorite ratings, particularly for tentpole franchise films “well, yes that was a movie.” Which is to say that it in all ways technically fulfilled the qualifications of motion picture cinema and while doing so did not actively annoy me for the 116 minutes that it was on screen. I was mildly entertained because I’m distracted by shiny colors and sparkly moving objects like a 6 month old. But I can’t say much more about it than that.

But it isn’t BAD. I have to stress that. It’s fine.

I was talking to a few people about it before I watched it and they said they liked it better than the original Ghostbusters, an they thought it would age better. I didn’t and I don’t. But not by much. To be fair though, I don’t love the original Ghostbusters. I’d give it maybe 2.75 out of 5 stars. It’s ok… and for it’s time it’s really innovative. And really Bill Murray in his prime drives that movie. It’s not his best performance, but he really makes it what it is. He turned a mediocre action comedy (this ain’t Caddyshack, folks) into something that could become a cult classic. That makes it fun. But as a movie. It’s really just a bit over mediocre. I might have maybe given it three stars if I were actually reviewing it in 1984, but it hasn’t aged well. Most of prestige of that film is wrapped up in it’s legend… not in what actually happens on screen. And that’s fine. Lot of movies that are far worse are very fun. Rocky Horror Picture Show is a shitty shitty shitty movie… that’s kind of the point.

No one in the new version has quite the charm of 1984 Bill Murray… and that includes 2017 Bill Murray. They’re not awful or anything like that. But the four principle leads are kind of typecast. Kate McKinnon probably does the best, but that’s because she hadn’t had an opportunity to really shine in a movie before this. And much like I said about her role in Office Christmas Party, she’s basically just one of her SNL characters. At least she goes for it though. Kristen Wiig and Melissa McCarthy don’t. They’re scaled down versions of characters that I’ve seen them play before… and better. And Leslie Jones is playing Paul Feig‘s idea of Leslie Jones. It’s basically the same character she plays on SNL but toned down by a white man to be less scary (seriously, I felt like her basic screen direction was “can you black it up!!! but you know, don’t black it up too much? Maybe a mid to late era Eddie Murphy and really tone down the Richard Pryor. Thanks!”). None of them are bad. They’re…. fine…

An interesting problem with the movie is that I’m not sure “why” it exists. Ok. I know why it got made. But I don’t know why it exists. Probably the thing I found most interesting about it is the metatextual self-referentialness of it. There’s several points where it basically comments directly on the cultural context in which it exists. That is to say, that in a lot of ways, it is a movie about female Ghostbusters that tries to make the argument that female Ghostbusters should be allowed to exist despite what the critics of the idea are saying. In other words, it comments directly on the controversy surrounding it existing in the first place…  a controversy that only exists because the movie was being made. These are the points in which I was most invested in the movie. There aren’t enough of them. There are other points when the movie attempts to make a feminist statement about the culture in general… they were “fine” but a little too on the nose. Again, I can’t really complain about any of them.. It’s just that I’ve literally seen every single member of the cast (as well as Feig as a writer) do a much better job of making that statement in far better movies.

Really though, the reason it got made was because the world needs franchises. This is a simple truth that I touched on in my Logan review. Franchises make non-franchise movies possible. But in that respect, this movie was a failure. It holds the problem of many recent Hollywood reboots. They’re pointless. It’s only there to make money off of something that people already love. I’m a huge fan of the 1941 film The Maltese Falcon with Humphrey Bogart. What most people don’t know is that that isn’t the original film. It’s a remake. I don’t have a problem with remakes. It was remade because the original 1931 version, with Ricardo Cortez, kinda sucks. So it was remade as though the original had never existed.

See, I was never the guy who was against this movie because women can’t be Ghostbusters. I was against this movie because I didn’t understand why we needed a new Ghostbusters movie AT ALL. The original Ghostbusters is not that good. It was never that popular. The CARTOON was.. and it has built a loyal fanbase over the years that sort of associate it with the movie. But the movie was just kind of ok. It was notable for being a two franchise film that did alright in an era where franchises weren’t as much of a thing as they are now. When this movie was first pitched, my friend Link once said to me “its great because kids should have their own version of this thing that I loved when I was a kid.” Except that’s silly. Kids have their own things now. Kids in the 21st century don’t need to love Ghostbusters. If they do, great. But they don’t need it. They have Hunger Games and Frozen. Trying to force feed them Ghostbusters makes as much sense as trying to force us kids from the 80s to love Bedknobs and Broomsticks or Chitty Chitty Bang Bang. So as producers Hollywood needed to ask itself “why are we making this movie?” Because as far as I can tell, the entire pitch for it was “wouldn’t it be cool if we did Ghostbusters but all the characters were women?” And the answer was no… not really…

This film, however, heavily relies on nostalgia in order to try to make it work. Feig made the decision to make a reboot rather than a sequel. But unlike Maltese Falcon, he wanted to have it both ways. There are constant callbacks to the original film. Murray is a distraction from the film. He does provide one small plot point, but it would have been better served by an unrelated actor. He has way too much screentime for the very small amount of relevance he has to the movie. He serves no other purpose other than to say “Look kids, it’s Bill Murray. You know… from the other Ghostbusters? That movie? From the 80s? Bill Murray kids!!! Because this is Ghostbusters!” Dan Akroyd, Annie Potts, Ernie Hudson and Sigourney Weaver make similar forced cameos that add little to the film other than to remind people of the other movie. Of course the problem is most of the fans of the other movie didn’t want the reboot. Because “… and all the characters are women is not a movie pitch.” It is not a storyline. It’s a single plot detail and that’s not enough to make a truly compelling movie.

And that’s the thing. If this had more been a movie about feminism and women in a “men’s” job I might have been more interested in it. Why not remake Backdraft? Because geeks don’t care enough about Backdraft as a franchise property. Why not make an original movie about four women scientists trying to save the city from… I dunno… mole people or something? Because then you wouldn’t be able to trade on the Ghostbusters name. And that’s sort of the problem. There’s no real story here. It’s not really a culturally relevant story about feminism. It’s not really any story at all. At the end of the day this had to be Ghostbusters first, a franchise second, sprinkle a social message on third, and if we have any room left for plot I guess you can do that… oh we don’t? Well, don’t worry about it… just have them fight a giant hole in the sky. Kids love that, right?

Seriously… here’s picture of a climatic giant hole in the sky. Is it from Ghostbusters? You don’t know, right? No one does!

When I look at a movie that’s a rebooted franchise, I feel like I have to ask myself “would I care about this movie if this were the first one I saw?” This came up during Rogue One (though not technically a reboot). In that case, I did; other than the last 15 minutes which everyone but me loved, I was invested enough in that story. In this case with Ghostbusters, the answer is not really. I cared about them enough to get through the entire movie, but they won’t stick with me afterwards… at least not for anything in the movie. I have to ask myself, if this film had been a completely unrelated product called “Molepeople Killers” with the exact same plot, would I recommend it to people? And … not really. I’d probably say something like “you know, if you’re flipping through channels and it happens to be on, it’s worth a watch… but if you really want to see McCarthy and Wiig shine in a movie about strong female characters you should really go buy Bridesmaids!”

The movie didn’t HAVE to be about feminism, but I wanted it to be. I think Feig even wanted it to be. And it kind of is, but it’s kind of lost in all the franchise nonsense substituting for compelling story and plot. A lot of things are kind of lost in this movie. It didn’t HAVE to feminism, but it SHOULD have been something. See, one of the things that makes a story into a classic is how well it examines it’s cultural moment, even if it does it through allegory. As a scholar I can look at the classic films of an era and see what was going on. The 1940s were all about anxiety over the war. The 50s were about anxiety over the bomb. The 60s were about civil rights. The 70s were about sexual rights. The 80s were about anxiety over the fall out from the previous three decades… you get the idea. Forty years from now, when scholars like me look back at the biggest films of the 2010s, they’re going to say “Holy shit, people in the 21st century were seriously afraid of holes in the sky. It seems like that was a serious issue!!!” And this was not the best movie about fighting a hole in the sky. It wasn’t even the best movie about fighting a hole in the sky in 2016. It wasn’t the worst hole in the sky movie either… it was fine.

★★½☆☆ (2.5 out of 5 stars).

Erin Childs, Joe Darowski, Ethan Schartman, Helena Nichols, Mike Walker liked this post

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Holes in the Sky… and the plot (a very late Ghostbusters review) was originally published on ChrisMaverick dotcom