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defmaybe · 13 days ago

Text

Mistake

NewJeans' Kim Minji (Angst) & NMIXX's Oh Haewon (Smut) x Male Reader

15.4k words

Some discussions of suicide

A/N: A few things before going in:

This is essentially an unedited, raw first draft. Expect an insane amount of errors and self-indulgent metaphors.

It's also unfinished in parts.

Still, I do genuinely hope that you enjoy this!

Thanks to Tyler and and Summer for putting me on the right track of being a writer!

Big inspirations from Caps' Departure, Nichu's Where Our Blue Is, Ddeun's Our Love Language is Sex, and Challengers

—

Prologue

—

Mistake all the time, You’re my mistake all the time, yeah

Mistake all the time, I’m your mistake all the time, yeah

—

You realized that you’ve never possessed the creative calibre as much as a writer should’ve had. Perhaps it’s appropriate that you’ve never pursued it as your major career. You read all these stories, and you knew that you just can’t come up with these plots. You don’t know how to do character developments, hell, you can barely write dialogues. The way people talk in real life remains a mystery to you. So, it’s probably for the best that you’re in engineering.

Though, it just takes a mistake to change it all. Many stories start with a catastrophe, a turning point, or something that puts the protagonist on their journey. So, here you are, you have a story right in front of you, so should it be transformed into something commendable? award-worthy? a selfish portrayal of what’s supposed to be just a passage of life? The goal of it doesn’t really matter much (though some recognition would be nice); you just had to write it out.

—

You don’t know how much time you have for this. Everyone has been telling you it should be long enough for the forgiveness to be ready, but you’ve also been wondering whether, if that day comes, it would be too long that the cadence won’t strike you as pristine as before.

Though, it hadn’t stopped you from fantasizing how this encounter would play out. You’d say something witty with a chuckle, and she’d smile back, or even better, a laugh. Both of you would see the separation as some childish actions of the past. The two of you would go back to where you were: grief-stricken, exhausted, scared high school students.

The sunlight would force you to retreat to some cafe during the afternoon, letting you two trade stories between the gaps. And as the sun sets, you’d sit beside her in some park, laid back a bit, hands on the grass to offer some balance. She’d do the same. Then your hearts would slowly be reconnected with each other, hoping to reclaim solace missing in the separation, as if you are the only two people on earth.

Firstly though, those events would have to be triggered by your words. And despite thousands of days of you trying to perfect every syllable, they just conveniently stuck in your throat. This isn’t what you’ve been readying yourself for. Awestruck and powerless is an understatement, and no tests have ever made you feel so drowned in your gargantuan number of thoughts.

You cannot say a word to her, and there may not be any second chance for this.

You are her mistake, and you’ll always be.

–

One: About You

–

There was something ‘bout you that now I can’t remember

It’s the same damn thing that made my heart surrender

And I miss you on a train, I miss you in the morning

I never know what to think about

–

I like you

What

I like you! Like do you wanna go out on a date?

(Seen)

It isn’t the longest silence you’ll experience with her, let alone with someone else, fourteen years on earth won’t give much of an insight to you, but it’s enough for you to know what she’s going to say next.

I’m sorry

Regret in her words bled through the pixels.

But I just see you as a friend

Being on text messages takes out the awkwardness a bit, but that doesn’t help transform the dagger, really.

Kim Min-Ji, your entire relationship was based on this encounter, and that three-week phase of some bullet crush upon entering a new school preceding this. You were charmed by a girl’s look, and then no one can compete with that.

You had found her face appealing, then you fantasized your whole life with her. One thing led to another, and you were head over heels for her in just a week.

Nowhere that you haven’t gone with her in your head: a date at an American diner—drinking milkshakes, a trip to the theater—watching some schlocky romance and cringing when the couple on the screen are kissing each other, and the most ambitious one: marriage, she’s smiling, everyone you’ve ever known is surrounding you, cheering as you are leaning in for a kiss.

Too bad you didn’t have a backup plan if it failed.

Consequences of the rejection had you decompressing every, single, thing you’ve been admiring about her to your friends, yeah, the same ones. You treated that as if it was the end of the world.

It was quite a phase, and you inevitably got closer to those people. They were slowly fading away eventually, one by one, but at least, at that moment, you felt like there’s someone listening to you.

While the dagger stuck, you kept eluding her, avoiding eye contact as you were walking past each other. You had to let her know you were hurt. God, that shit looked so damn petty in retrospect.

It was a month later when the heartbreak dissipated, and both of you decided that the next three years cannot be spent evading each other. (To be honest, it’s mostly just for you to stop being weird.) A nod was all it took, and that probably was a lot better than having her as a girlfriend.

–

She wants you to live on your life, separately

Being on text messages (and having it delivered through a friend) takes out the cruelty a bit, but that doesn’t help transform the dagger, really.

It started with just some petty acts, a crude joke. Then, just over a month later, you deleted every single picture of her, almost five years of them. It wasn’t a hard thing to do when you were so deep in melancholy, just a few minutes after a friend brought the breakup message to you.

You thought you had to block her everywhere. But with every step taken to create some distance from her, those actions just, somehow, create unending echoes tormenting you.

Why

You really wanted to fix this; you really fucking did. You’ve never wanted it to end, even when you sent some faux, response-seeking farewell messages after days of waiting for her confirmation of how she felt, just to have her come and reply about the exam she was having just a few minutes later.

Are you gonna send something to her again if you know?

But even with her crying emojis, you were relentless with your replies. I fucking hate you still echoes to this day. It shaped how you see yourself: a selfish, yet codependent, self-indulgent, unlovable person. Even with the apology texts you sent a few weeks later (which she never saw), those four words were tattooed on you.

I won’t

You wished you could, but this answer seemed to be the way to satisfy her.

Think about it

Like all those years

What have you done to her

It was supposed to end with your first apology text, when she called herself an asshole over it. Then, you became one yourself. It turned out that reading only the preview message doesn’t give you the full picture, so you paid the price just a month later. You replied to that, then you waited. And with how God made you so insecure, you thought she wanted it to end after a week you took to reply.

You had problems.

It’ll all be okay

Someday

Looking at your friend’s text, you sighed, knowing that you can only let fate and time lead you to it.

–

You were nothing more than a friend. She sure loved you, just not in the way one would perceive as romantic. There were kind words, there was thoughtful advice, there were chatting deep into a lot of nights.

Any form of physical contact though, you brought it up in some conversations (which one eventually being the spark that burned it all), were always quickly suppressed by her. So, there you were, having her as a friend, and the bar for where your future girlfriends should be.

hey

need some advice rn

uh huh

there’s this guy

send me his pic

alright wait a sec

[photo]

my god

what

okay yeah I know why he’s a big deal

fuck auto caps on I again

fuck

just turn it off in the settings lol

thanks

[Replied to: okay yeah I know why he’s a big deal] ikr

[Replied to: thanks] no prob

how is it with him

As it was flourishing, there were times that you wished for it to be as easy as a kiss and a happily ever after, with how well-gelled you’ve always been together. But the distance between you is just too much.

You can’t conveniently visit her on every other weekend, while she really didn’t want to close the distance from being a close friend (or as you would think to yourself later: “our love may not coincide at the same time”). So, there you were, you became each other’s advisor for those times you’ve had.

–

All of what you saw as confidential: all the vibrations of your heart, all the tears running down your cheeks when alone, all the ties you cut and formed, as any teenager would do, was at last, delivered to your parents, at the age you didn’t think it was possible for such change.

You didn’t expect that your parents would take it well, with how you’ve withheld everything for the last half decade, reducing every answer to their questions into a binary set consisting of yes and no. But as they’ve always been, they didn’t leave you in the dark.

You pleaded guilty to all of it – how you were wretched inside. How she became so much to you, how you took everything she says as an oath, how her jokes lit up a smile on your face every time, and how they still haunt you, to this day, keeps you from initiating any new, proper relationship with someone.

They kept coming back, even if you thought time would slowly fade them away. The minor details, yes, but the bigger ones are still having free shots on you every now and then.

The first few months were difficult. Bed seemed to be the best place you could’ve been, lying down, your fingers sliding reels after reels for god knows how long. Though, it hits you, years of being alone, walling people out was detrimental to you. It starts with some small repairs: story replies to disconnected peers, dates with your close friends, more exposure to your family.

You seek connections, desperately, to fill up the hole she once occupied. You took too many side jobs aside from the grueling university classes, and to be honest, you did meet a lot of new people in the next semester, even more than you did in the last two or three years here.

The space though, five years of freestyle carving put it into this twisted, incomprehensible, harrowing state in which all the adjectives in the world aren’t enough to define the shape of its former owner. How every fibre of your existence was tied to her was, as seen from outside, sad.

Sure, it’s not wrong to let someone into your life, but with this extent – thousands of words to pry out a response - it just reeks codependency in retrospect.

It took some time, and a bunch of people, to cover up the space. You never quite make it like it was; there’s always a hole somewhere, and you can still see the footprints she left on you through it.

How you tell people close to you, most of the time, is that there was a fight - one you started. Then you were being a bitch for too long, and by the time you returned, she put you out of the picture. You added some bits of how you were dependent on her for your heartaches, how you treated her like shit for years, how you sent waves of messages that she didn’t reply because she was busy, how you said you hated her, only to retract and regret it a few days later, then it all ended.

It could be some way of unearthing emotional vulnerability under that “cold” façade - as often pointed out by your friends, which you deflected as crippling social anxiety. You thought people would trust you more if you decided to tell them how you succumbed to those inner demons. It works most of the time.

You told them that you cried to some K-pop song that you can only understand like two lines.

You told them how you tried to recover the photos with some external program not a week later.

You told them, with an otherworldly consistency, that it’s your fault, never hers.

You told them you’d send something a year later, as an apology, to return to where you once were.

You told them that you might crumble again if the response is anything but a warm embrace.

Your taped-up heart remained intact when the day came, having your friends around and such after a year of reconstruction, and you surrendered to the fact that you really can’t do much more than a guilt-ridden text. But it’s not easy at all to watch “Sent just now” become “yesterday”, then “last week”, then “last month” slowly unfold. Then you knew that your strength just cannot handle this; cadence can’t exist with a single note.

It took you back to that day, when the future was just this black, unbounded, silent yet serene space. Times where every knife suddenly became alluring, heights weren't what you were afraid of anymore, the next trip to a pharmacist might be a deathtrap.

This eternal apathy: it was tempting to give in to it – to just leave all of these behind. Yet, you weren’t so sure to give yourself such an ending. People won’t like it, or do they? A lot of stories saw their main characters to their ends, no matter which way it would be. And to be fair, a lot of them became cult classics. You weren’t so sure which would be the right ending for yours.

–

Two: Now That We Don’t Talk

–

You grew your hair long, you got new icons

And from the outside, it looks like you’re trying lives on

–

One advice you took from your therapist is to keep journaling your emotions, each day. And even with the poor self-discipline, whether in a book or a journal, you carved your grimaces, laughters, and tears into words. But perhaps that became too customary. And as time passes, you find the storyteller side of yours magnetized outwards. So, there you were, in front of your old laptop, nibbling on the dagger.

–

Your plane landed in Tokyo mere hours ago. It was a few days after your sophomore year finals. You were paying for your inability to sleep with the shaking cabin, and it was just nine (Tokyo Standard Time) in the morning. Your eyes went dry, and you can feel the irregular beats of your heart. The sleeping pills from your psychiatrist can’t handle the excitement of getting on a plane, especially if it’s to Tokyo.

It’s cold, spring cold. Snow is nowhere to be seen, but your tropical genes are already shaken with a small breeze. You excused yourself from your family for some minutes outside the airport, to get some air for alertness.

The train would depart in an hour, but with the risk-averse nature of your parents, you had only 20 minutes to snap a few photos around Narita. You quickly pace yourself against the crowd, to the outside. You strode through the arrivals terminal, before reaching the automated door, finally catching the air. And it’s cold, spring cold.

It was cloudy, yet the sun was bright enough to deflect your vision away from the matter of protecting it. You pick up your camera to snap a few photos, testing the recipes you had looked up from home. And god, wasn’t Japan so pretty?

But maybe it’s the wind, maybe it’s the temperature, maybe it’s the sleep deprivation, you’re drawn to her, again. It was just over a month ago since the incident. Yet miles away from your parents’ car, when Minji had her dagger delivered through your phone, and as the distance grew, you realized that it’s poisoned.

Should I check my block-list?

It echoes, even if you had no reason to do it. And you gave in, under that spring air: cold, dry, unrelenting, merciless.

You took a seat by a slanted cream walkway outside. A man was sitting across from you. He looked up, before going back onto his phone, nonchalant to your presence, and it’s like you could complain about it.

And immediately, you take out your phone, so eager to check your blocked accounts.

She changed her profile picture into something that you can’t even make sense of: her. Even under the face of the drawn character, you could feel her radiate through your screen. Locals and tourists are still marching towards their destination, either into the city, or a plane, unbeknownst to your internal collapse. It’s probably the way your face is always the same - concealing the tears so well - cheerful or devastated.

She moved on from you: her old persona shed, bio rewritten, era changed. Yet there you were, at least a sea away, crumbled into pieces.

Perhaps it was time for you to shed a new shell.

–

“Minji will be here too!” One of your friends said.

It was the first time you had a sleepover at your friends’ apartment. Alcohols were, of course, involved. A bit of drunk chatting with your friends and walking around helped with the university-induced depression, which you, then freshman, naively dismissed as a normal thing. Then, you heard she would come for some lunch before you go back to the mundane routine you got yourself into.

“Heyyyyy.” You shouted into the room as soon as the apartment’s door was closed. She was sitting on the sofa in the middle of your friends’ studio-sized room.

“Hey!” She seemed to look different from her high school days, crimson on her lips, longer eyelashes, paler cheeks. She wears makeup now, and you wouldn’t lie that it took you by surprise - how beautiful she was. It may have been contributed to the fact that you had just six hours of sleep the night before, but she was gorgeous that day, breathtaking even.

“God, I miss you so much.” You said, sitting down beside her on the couch, while looking over the screen of her ancient phone.

“Awww, thanks babe.” Minji blew you a kiss, irony, to which you happily caught.

“Long trip?” You asked, knowing how far she is from the city.

“Hour and a half.” She murmured.

“Sorry about that.” You chuckled, laying your back on the couch. It’s a display of your insufferable narcissism as usual, a humble smugness.

Your friends were too busy on their phones, waiting for a member to finish his shower before taking a trip into the city.

“No need, I’m here to see you.” Minji beams.

“Thanks, Minji.”

Not that you haven’t seen love blooming in front of you before, it’s just that you can’t grow the petals to display your stern sentiment. It has been, to say the least, difficult for you to express any tinge of compassion.

–

“ROMEO TAKE ME SOMEWHERE WE CAN BE ALONE, I’LL BE WAITING ALL THERE’S LEFT TO DO IS RUN.”

It’s only the two of you screaming between the other guys in the karaoke room. Even if it’s Taylor fucking Swift, she still seems to be threaded just between you two.

“YOU’LL BE THE PRINCE AND I’LL BE THE PRINCESS, IT’S A LOVE STORY BABY JUST SAY YES.”

You were pointing to each other, with others baffled by how enthusiastic you were.

Both of you kept going like wannabe singers until the end.

“WE WERE BOTH YOUNG, WHEN I FIRST SAWWWWW YOU.”

And the song ends, leaving only you two sharing the only spotlights in the room.

“Minji, fuck, god, that was great,” you panted, trying to catch your breath after screaming Love Story.

“You should thank me for listening to only English songs,” she scoffs, smiling at you.

You attempted to make a cute face, sarcastically. “Thanks, Miss Kim.”

“It’s my job to listen to Taylor Swift for you.” She bowed and smiled.

It’s always the irony-infused conversations, but deep down, you know you could trust her, at least once you do. So many of your problems were solved by her. Just tell them directly, just do this, just do that. And if you didn’t even want to, she’d take your place to show how competent in the field she is, just for you.

As your friends continue with the songs you two can’t capture the lyrics, you slid yourself towards her. “So, how’s the med school?”

She finds the words to answer the completed question for a while. Your other friends are still screaming their lungs out. “It… fucking sucks, yeah, it beat my ass back to high school.” She’d frowned at her script.

“I guess so, I shouldn’t have asked, even. We should talk about light things instead, I’m sor—”

“Don’t be.” Minji cut you off. “It’s fine, I needed a place to vent, anyway.”

The mood, again, swung into glee along with the background. “Oh, so what, Miss Kim, you’re going to use me as your personal venting tool now?”

As if you predicted your future.

“I might, if it doesn’t get better.” She’d snickered at her own comment.

Your expression softens to sympathy. “Well, I’m here. Miss Kim, Go ahead.”

“Really? We can chat about this later, to be fair” She negotiated your offer, not wanting to ruin the mood.

You pondered for a moment, as the song came to an end. “I suppose so, wanna pick the song?”

Minji smiled. “Sure.”

It was these small moments that you kept digging up, even if it is surrounded by smiles and laughs. I wasn’t kind enough to her. I said the wrong things. I was selfish. And it slowly grew into something far more sinister. I am a bad person.

–

“Okay, I’ll post this and tag you all.”

After the group selfie, it was time for you to go back to your regular depression-inducing activities at university.

“I have to get going now. I have class tomorrow morning.” Slightly annoyed by the time restraint, it’s evening now.

“Don’t forget to tag me~” Minji would speak out, playfully, a façade for the fear of being excluded.

“What if I do?” You pointed a finger to your chin.

“I’ll block you, that’s what I’d do”

“Aww, I’d be so sad.” You sarcastically pouted, before giving a farewell, “Bye, babe. Bye, everyone.”, waving.

“See ya.”

That was the last time you’d see her face.

Upon reelings, you can only recall the words as a vague, half-hearted goodbye. Oh how you felt so secure with her back then you just gave some shitty farewell, unbeknownst to how it would stick with you as her final image of you – the fact that has been gripping you tightly ever since.

–

Maybe, in a way, it is to broadcast the insides of your heart to the world. It’s always been what you do best. You found yourself sitting down in front of your laptop, pondering on the word choices. You were walking on a minefield of words, avoiding repetitions that would make your readers groan at such occurrences.

It could’ve been easy - the one who left was the villain, and the one who found you is the typical manic pixie dream girl any man would want. You would boast it when you meet her again, saying something along the lines of “I won the breakup.”, or “Guess who’s crying now.”. It’s quippy, snarky, made-ready, and gives some sense of revenge to the readers, and to you.

It’s not hard to give in to the waning under the half-lit moon; the vengeance is too alluring. Still, perhaps it was that single, small spot in the dark sky - the one that keeps on flickering a signal. And it was decrypted into the ending you didn’t want, acceptance, even if the creeping clouds are slowly curtaining the sky. The star keeps on flickering, to guide you.

And you followed it. The piece didn’t get as much recognition as you’d like, as the grudges were, even if partly, let go, and only mentioned as your thorns. Yet, that day, those spikes were shed, for a new shell to form to protect you from your own hatred.

–

Three: Feels Like

–

Met you at the right time

This is what it feels like

–

You were told that it’s going to be some kind of joint committee between universities. And so, as one of the chosen, you are here, in such rare occasions of being in a suit. It’s tiring - you just got off from your senior project, internship is approaching in a week, right after the Christmas holidays. Yet, being given a few activity hours from your university isn’t a bad offer at the time.

Some classical music you’ve never bothered to look their names up were sent through speakers; they probably couldn’t afford a real band. The grandiose, dimly blue-tinted-lit hall was occupied by hundreds of representatives. Waiters were walking back and forth to corporate demands for the food and drinks. The sounds from all kinds of conversations are lighting this ball up. It’s, from a whim, lively for now.

As always, you felt out of place here. You’ve never been the type that would slot into a conversation with ease. Every word you say might be interpreted as an insult, a showboating of your dull wit. So, silence seemed to be the best choice here. You can’t have people see you as some lowly, dense, out-of-place ordinary guy.

You kept checking your watch, anxiously, it should have been eleven when you were to leave, and time gets slower on purpose. Words around you were slowly, but surely on its way to push you to your edge. There were a couple of people from your university too, just that they were nowhere to be seen. Maybe they are in the toilet? Maybe they can talk to strangers? Maybe they don’t want to be around you?

With every second ticked, an uneasy feeling crept up your body with confidence, eager to take control. Your eyes were stuck to your phone, with right thumb swiping short videos after another. Each one elicited a dopamine shot to keep the shadows at bay, but it could do just that. You know this stuff is going to shave off your attention span bit by bit, but not faltering in front of everyone now just matters more.

Until-

“Sorry.” A stark, yet tender voice shook you, despite its message. You expected someone to come take you into their company, but it’s still a long way to go to get rid of this shell.

You turned your head back until she’s in your vision. A short-haired woman stood before you, around your age; her lips formed a weak grin. Her left hand was holding an empty plate, though with a few hints of red velvet’s frosting on it. “Can I have some more cake?”

Her right hand was in her blazer pocket.

You realized you had been standing in front of the cake stand for the last fifteen minutes. Fuck, this is embarrassing. You immediately moved away from the front table. What if I was seen as some fucker guarding all those cakes?

“What’s with that face?”

“Uh—uh—” Being heavy in your thoughts can sometimes send some erratic, unwanted instructions to your facial features. This Fuck, this is embarrassing ordered the classic eyebrow squints, and a slight mouth frown.

“Are you seriously getting mad because I told you to move a bit?”

Ok, ok, shit, what the fuck is happening now. You were lost, failed to come up with a response. Those doe eyes were sure to be flammable with how you can feel trickles of sweat on your forehead now. First, you were all by yourself in what’s supposed to be a networking opportunity, and then this. This is how you are going to be viewed by these people now, an entitled, selfish asshole. A real chance pulled away from a single mistimed expr—

She pulled you back with her contagious simper. “I’m sorry. I was j—” She broke into another chain of laughter; there’s no reservation in those, like at all. “I was just fucking with you.” She put her right hand to cover her gaping mouth, while swaying her upper half back and forth like it was the funniest shit she has ever pulled.

You may have just felt the largest absolute emotional slope in your life - it doesn’t really matter in terms of good or bad, just closest to being a straight line. You let out a shaken sigh, then, without knowing, you can’t help but start laughing with her in unison.

“God, I’m so sorry. I didn’t expect you to be s–so anxious about that.” The hilarity subsided, as she was starting to regain her composure.

You replied with some remnants of the previous guffawing. “It’s fi—ha, ha, it’s fine.” Still taking in what’s just happened.

You finally got a proper look at her. And on that exact night you first met, she wore a gray blazer, perfectly compatible with her decent height, just a few inches shorter than you – did she get it tailored? The navy wide-leg pants she had on her really gave her this “young and rising executive” look. Her short hair was a bit messy, probably from all the walking and talking she had while finishing that poor red velvet cake.

Her nose was supposed to be the part that had you gawked, with how its bridge was flawlessly sculpted while still fitting with every other part on her face. And with the crimson lipstick on her plump lips, those features alone, perhaps, had Aphrodite working overtime.

Then, just a bit above those, her hazel eyes, the ones that will have you gladly trapped in it for hours. The sunsets you will be sharing is going to be reflected in her eyes, as you bring your face closer to hers, to realize that she’ll be the person you can, and want to spend the rest of your life with.

(We still need to come back to the first night though. You haven’t gotten much more of her personality than that joke.)

“So, aren’t you going out and talking to someone?” She asked, her right hand using the cake server to pick up the lone chocolate one in the center of the table.

“Well, uh, it’s kinda hard to explain” You gestured your hands into an “I don’t know” pose, moving them up and down a little to imitate a weighing scale, as if you know what’s on both sides.

She puts on her curious face, staring straight into your eyes, trying to pry out an answer. “Try me”

You tried to hit back with your straight face, ready to not give in to her request, but to no avail. Her stare was getting even more intimidating. God, that gaze is strong.

“Fine.” You replied, as she giggled with her victory.

“I can’t.”

“What do you mean you can’t?” She furrowed her eyebrows. She really looks like a confused bear with that face.

“Never have the courage to do it.”

“Well, you look like you have enough to talk to me.” She cuts the chocolate cake with her fork, before putting the piece into her mouth.

“That’s because you’re the one initiating.”

“Oka—“ She tried to reply with a stuffed mouth, but the content was still too big. She chewed it a bit more with her right hand covering her mouth, the other putting a stop sign on you. “Okay? And am I wrong for doing that?”

“No! I—“ Her right hand moved to her waist; she was burning you with her eyes, cheeks still moving. It is important that you don’t say the wrong words here. “Thanks?”

“You’re welcome~” She twisted the last syllable into a melody, before letting out a cute giggle. “I’m Haewon by the way. And sorry for fucking with you a little too much.” She offered a handshake, which you reluctantly accepted.

You suspected that there’s something weird with her then, with how chatty she was with you. Who would be going around, talking like this to other people?

It turned out a few years later that you’re the weird one.

“Aren’t you supposed to have some friends with you?” Haewon continues her pressing on you.

Shrugged, “Yeah, but I lost them like an hour ago, so—", as you fanned your eyes around for the umpteenth time of the night. The crowd rumbled, but still no sight of your peers. “I really have nowhere to go.”

Haewon kept switching her gaze between you and the crowd, as if to make more topics and banters out of it.

“You wanna join?” Haewon finally locked you within her sight; her thumb pointed away, into the uncertainty of the crowd.

“Uh—"

It’s one of the few times you picked the right choice, even if it was clear as day.

“Let’s go then”

Joy gleamed her face, “Great, follow me”

Along with Haewon, you walked with her into the crowd. You bumped into some people who are apathetic to your action, and some even give you an understanding look, unbothered by your mistakes. The classical music blaring around seems to calm everyone down.

You’d finally reached a group of similarly-dressed students. “Welcome back Haewon, what took you so long?” One of them muttered out.

“Him.” Haewon replied, while looking at you and beams a smile.

–

Four: Cutie

–

Woke up in your orbit

Now where do I start?

–

Eighth wonder of the world: how the fuck can you secure a date with the royalty, Oh Hae-Won. You were aware – made known by her friends teasing you during a few group dates, knowing how Haewon has been spending a lot of time on her phone lately, too often with a grin on her face.

“Hey” Haewon appears behind you in a sudden, voices in your head are now scattered.

A little shocked, “Hey”.

White tee, brown, modern crossbody bag on her shoulder, light navy jeans, hair a little shorter from that day, topped wi—

“Haiyah!” Haewon calls out, snapping you out of your trance. “You’re doing that again, aren’t you.”

“Doing what?” You replied, hoping she didn’t notice your pondering, borderline ogling on her choice of garments.

“Thinking.” She taps her head lightly. “Like you were being hypnotized or something.”

Rebuttal, “No, I wasn’t?”, and your eyebrows are marred.

“Yes, you were. And the first time I met you was also like this; you were lost in your head, and staring at me like you were trying to gauge something out of me.” She retorts with an arrogant chuckle.

“Alright, alright, fine, I’m a daydreamer, and what’s the problem with that?” You deflect the guilt. Shit, what the fuck did I say?

“Well—" Haewon nibbles her chin while finding the word. “People don’t really like being stared at, you know.”

“Yeah, that’s a fair point, my bad.” The people pleaser inside you got the better of the debater.

“Hey, look, let me give you some advice.” Determination sparks in her eyes, her hands holding on to the string. “Don’t think, just—do it, or feel it, you know.” You aren’t quite sure how to play along with her words. “The reason I’m here today is because I see something in you, and I’m sure you see something under this pretty face.”

And it’s true, Haewon sparks a sense of an adventurer inside you, even if they’re through internet lines. She brings up quite a number of places in the city you’ve never even heard the name of, and thinking of the list is, to say the least, nauseating. But under the boulder, your determination to match her venturesome nature isn’t crushed after all.

“You’re speaking like one of those life coaches, you know.” You sarcastically reply with a chuckle.

“It’s called encouragement, get used to it.” She nicks your shoulder softly. “Shall we start the walk?”

“Sure.”

–

You two stride along the road, catching the sight of other sightseers, both local and foreign. Graffitis are etched into the walls by your sides, interspersed with numerous coffee shops aimed to lure gen z customers with their furnishings. And one seems to work on you guys, because you now have an iced thai tea, while Haewon has a matcha latte, also iced.

“So.” You cut the silence, taking a sip of your content. “Are you here often?” It’s one of the more “talky” questions you can think of right now. Your head slightly turns towards her; your eyes during the rest (more than half actually) of the work to catch her in the bullseye of your vision.

“This is just my second time, to be honest.” She replies, drinking her matcha. “And I love how these buildings look; they probably look gorgeous on your camera, don't they?”

“It’s a good substitute for my Tokyo needs.” You scoff, scanning over the old houses around you.

“Oh yeah, those photos did look breathtaking, I can see why.” She brings up the photos from over a year ago, letting out a tiny smile in the process. “I’ve been to Osaka once actually.”

Surprised, “Osaka? How come you haven’t told me this already?”, she has never brought it up during the six months you’ve known each other.

“I can’t describe it as well as you, really.” Haewon looks down, still strolling at the same pace as before. “Plus, it was just for a project. We didn’t have much time for sightseeing.” She mutters out, eyes fixated on the ground.

“I think it would be fun, please?” A chortle escapes you, thinking it would let her know your enthusiasm.

It’s quite a clear day for a rainy season - hints of white clouds here and there, but never enough to rage against your first date. You two remain at a distance, still, leaving a gap between your shadows.

“No, no, you even laughed at the idea of it, I won’t tell you that.” She calls you out, whimpering as the sentence ends.

The next thirty seconds go by in silence, the two of you keep glancing at each other, evading contact at any signals. People pass you by as you walk, widening the distance between the tip of your fingers. Guilt, fear, uncerta–

“I won’t laugh again, I promise.” You give her an assurance, and that’s the best you can do.

“Really?” She looks up at you, catching your honest compassion.

“If it’s funny, I might.” You chuckle. “But I’m sure it was a good experience for you.”

“Thanks.” You lit up a grin on her face, as she’s getting all excited to tell you about her adventure.

“So, this was like three years ago, back when I had just finished my freshman year, it was a subway surveying thing.” Haewon starts her tale, with you two turning left, now walking to the river. “I went with a group of people, and it was mostly lecturing around the tracks, really.” She chuckles. “So we had just the evening for ourselves for like, a week.”

“We went to a firework festival on the first day. God, it was so fucking crowded, but the sparking lights looked spectacular. They did the color work well.” As she tells the story, you can’t help but get immersed in the words. There’s clarity in the way she recounts it, greatly assisted with how often she says “flickering”, “cold”, “bright”, “exhausting”, “overwhelming”, and much, much more.

“The wagyu just melted in my mouth.”

“The system was confusing, to be honest, like a spider’s web, but they helped me with that a lot.”

“Yeah, it was fucking cold, and I brought so many shorts because I underestimated late spring Osaka.”

You two walk past some more old buildings and a few more cafes, with her story as the melody. It sweeps your leg like a damn good movie. How vivid the atmosphere she’s enamoring you in, how she’s so enthusiastic in her reminiscence, and how she grins and narrows her eyes upon any mention of food.

After a while, the river is finally in your view, as she’s getting through her final day at Marble Beach.

“I pulled a friend I made there to see the beach with me, and he said that it changed his life.” She laughs. “It was beautiful, you really should see it.”

A soft smile escapes you. “Well, I kinda get him, really.” You two finally reach the cement barrier, heighting just on your hips. It’s not too short that Haewon would have to throw a life ring to you, yet not too tall to obstruct your river view, enough for you to rest your arms on it as if you’re posing.

“Yeah, the Odaiba Beach, right? I saw the photos, once you mentioned that.”

[More dialogue]

–

“How far is your stop?”

“Four stations.”

“Wow, I’m on six, then interchange to another four.” She sighs at the daunting route, knowing she’d be alone.

The carriage slightly shakes as it takes a small turn. Sight of people are only a few; both of you are holding onto a pole in the middle. You’re gathering all the willpower to keep your weak hand from falling onto hers.

Haewon is looking out the window in the same direction as you, eyes examining the view outside - nocturne. “Have you ever gotten bored of this?” She asks, turning her sight to face you still looking out along.

You ponder for a moment. “It looks pretty at night.”

“That’s true, but it’s not the question.” She replies. “And the way you talk is strange, you know that? Especially with how you answer questions”

“Probably from watching a lot of movies, I guess.” You deflect.

“See? You did it again!” She points at you, unbeknownst to the inadvertently closing distance between your hands on the pole. “It’s not a peeve or anything, really, but I see that you always answer yes-no questions with a reason, not directly yes or no.”

“Oh yeah, I’ve got this complaint a bit often. I have to say the same thing twice, or even thrice to a lot of people.” You reply.

“They probably expect a yes or no, perhaps?” Haewon ends the playful nudge with a chuckle. “I don’t mind though; I can catch your words.”

You can only smile in response. “Yeah, you’re gonna have to do that for a while.” You laugh, in a volume that wouldn’t make it echo inside the whole train.

“Woah, getting daring just being with me for a day? I’m having a good influence on you~” Haewon playfully takes a jab.

“You’ll have a lot of influ–” You pause. “That’s the same joke, yeah, that’s the same joke, I’m not saying it.”

She laughs, not quite as contained as yours, attracting a few looks onto you. “Yeah, I’ll see my schedule first.” Her laughter would dissolve into a smile. “I think I can sort out a few things for us.”

Us. You can melt right here and now. The way she says it so easily is just too attractive. What does she think of me? Are we a thing now? Should I kiss her?

“U—Us?” You stutter out, mind flayed.

Haewon is locked onto her calendar. “Yeah, I know I’m not that good at planning but—” She meets your eyes. “Oh.”

[You are blushing and there’s going to be a kiss at the end of this chapter.]

–

Five: Party Police

–

You don’t have to leave

You can just stay here with me

Forget all the party police

We can find comfort in debauchery

= = =

The sound of the air conditioner fills the room, emulsified with your anticipation, forming a perfect cadence. The air between you is a mixture of both minty breaths you insisted the two of you to take a spearmint candy, the gender-neutral-honey-scented body wash both of you used in separate shower sessions, and the summer breeze air purifier Haewon bought from your first trip to the convenience store together.

You two are inside her room, sitting on the queen-sized bed, hands clutched between the hole your tangled legs make.

Haewon’s lips are slightly parted, as if their owner is about to make out a sound, yet the whirring fan blows any of her half-thought intentions away. And instinctually, to which you realized a few blinks later, yours are also making their own gap, and the whirring fan blows any of your half-thought intentions away.

“I—" Haewon would be the first to stabilize her frequency, ever so mildly fluctuated by your proximity. “I love you.” She can only confirm it in a whisper, barely vibrating the dormant air around you.

Yet, it seeps in, perhaps by the sincere nature in her voice. Haewon has never looked this fragile before, and your next move can actually ignite her neurons with blue flame this time.

“I—I love you t—too.” Flushed, presto heart rhythm, you muttered out these simple words. Resting air now shook with the expressions.

You’ve kissed her many times before, the end of the first date, the middle of the second date, the start of the third date, then a full on make out session during one of The Academy’s International Film nominees, with an unknowing crowd in the theater (it helps that the movie is quite a rare action triumph, so that the wet smooches of your lips are buried under clips after clips being unloaded, and the bullet cases clanking on the floor). Though, never once has it ended with her uncontrollably uttering fucks or shits, or even deity names neither above nor under you.

Haewon starts to lean closer to you, wholeheartedly knowing that this won’t be a normal kiss. Her head tilts so acutely, barely deviated from the axis. The small, deep hum from her throat is unexpected, with her eyelids closed and all. Yet, who are you to say no to her proclamation of love.

The expectations are high, yours, hers, on this kiss to capture much more than your lips. It’s both of your first times after all. And with the contact, you can’t help but match her tone in lovestruck. Hands are still stationed, too afraid to take this further, until they aren’t yours that touches a face first. Haewon fondles your cheeks with both of her hands as the kiss ensues, persuading you to reciprocate, and you do.

Fervor rises along the ticks of all the clocks, Haewon pierces the gap you opened with her tongue, invading your mouth. You gasp in shock, signaling her to break off from the session.

“Shit, are you okay?” Haewon’s eyes enlarged, her breathing still out of rhythm.

Giggling, “No, no, no, just a little shocked, let’s continue”, as you initiate the action this time, hands holding her cheeks, tongue sweeping the insides of her mouth.

Again, fervor rises along the ticks of all the clocks, the sound of the kiss becomes the only thing you can hear now. It’s wet, a little salty, albeit ardent, and rapturous.

And with an unknown source of bravery, your hand traverses down from her cheeks, grazing her neck. Haewon hums a minim into your throat as your fingers hit the ridge of her chest. And through the fabric, you give her left mound a squeeze, eliciting another two-beat note from her. Tender, addictive are the first few words as your fingers sink into the cloth, and the desire arises.

Your voice, muffled through the kiss, and raspy in hunger, asks such a bold question. “Fuck, God, Haewon, may I suck on them?”

Haewon would hum another note into your mouth, before unlatching from the torrid endeavor. “Make me moan, and don’t use your teeth.” She commands.

It’s all instinctual now, don’t think, just feel echoes. You playfully push Haewon onto the bed, eyes focus on your targets. The rhythm of her ragged breaths now takes over the room.

You run your hands down her luscious curves, feeling every hill and hollow on the fabric, before hitting an edge. ”May I?” As you grab the hem of her shirt, so eager to expose her.

”Of course, babe”

Permission granted, you swiftly pull the edge of her garment up, with her putting her arms up for easy exposure. The stream of the sight of her somewhat toned midriff, perky chest, and collarbones runs through your eyes, and it’s almost too heavy to take it in. “Fuck.” And you can only give a profanity for it.

“I know, right?” She responds, chuckling.

Magnetized, and sudden, your lips latch onto her left, brown peak, coating her breast with your saliva. She complies with your action under you, letting out a symphony whenever your mouth is right at the top of her areola, right before leaving, then swallowing it again.

The buds, excited, erect under your touch. This seems to go on for minutes. You keep switching between her left and right mounds, one hand kneading the mound that isn’t currently savored, with the other traversing her upper body, marking every square inch as yours. You won’t get bored of this easily, especially with her moaning this loud.

“More, baby, more” Haewon pleads. Her hands start to push your head onto her erect nipples now.

If you’re going to be honest, it tastes just like any other part of a human body: skin, with some honey aroma after the shower. Perhaps it’s desire, perhaps it’s ardor, or perhaps it’s love, maybe all of them together, you were drawn to them. Her writhing cries only fuel the attraction further, and the force you use with your lips.

Until–

“Fuck, fuck–, yeah.” She whines. “That–That’s good, but I want more now, baby.” Haewon mutters in the same pitch as her moans, unable to retain her usual deep tone. “You seem to– love my tits– a lot, don’t you.” Her talking is constantly cut short to make ways for the ragged breaths.

“Twenty-one years of drought, babe” You chuckle, turning your head to face hers, chin hovering above her hard nubs.

“You wanna use your mouth or your dick, huh?” Slightly annoyed, yet excited, and perhaps too lecherous that she comes off as a horny cutie joke bear. “I gotta cum first, or at the same time with you, isn’t it” She seems to be aware of how your body works, and she’s right. You don’t wanna risk being unable to get yourself up again within five minutes, while she waits, unattended.

”Damn, babe, you’ve come prepared.”

”No?, I’m gonna come with you here!” She lets out another laughter, breaking the lustful mood a bit. God, she just can’t go a minute without making a joke. Her pursuit in digging any giggles out just kills you every time, even if that means the problems were hardly addressed, tingling a small part of you on the occurrences.

You sink into the glee with her. “Oh fu— fuck off babe.” But this lustful tryst just drives you into a whirlpool right now. You quickly dispose of your shorts (why the fuck would you guys even wear clothes if you’re just going to fuck after???), freeing your delirious digit.

“God.” Haewon stares at your erect cock in awe, twitching, a glint of concern in her eyes. You wouldn’t say that it’s exactly big, but it’s enough to make her gulp. “Do I have to take all of this?”

“I’ll push slowly.” You replied, panting from the brimming anticipation.

Without a word, Haewon yanks her shorts away. Another stream of her eden, thighs, and the full lower body strikes you. And Haewon is now bare in front of you, glowing, despite her cheap light hanging above. You want to cherish this moment forever, freeze it in time, or at least just slow down a bit. Oh Hae-Won trusts you enough to expose herself, fully, in front of you. And you aren’t sure which gesture can compare to this as her proclamation of love (maybe a marriage proposal, but let’s not get into that yet).

“I thought you’d do it slower”

“All that foreplay got me so fucking turned on, babe, plus, I’m not on the shy side.”

“The nipple sucking?”

“Yeah, that meal you just had. Also, take off that shirt, I wanna feel all of you.”

Ordered, you hastily get rid of the last piece of garment, tossing it into the void, following your shorts. Both of you are now fully naked, only the cold, compressed air is your barrier now.

“Good, now come here” She says with a wink, provocative, commanding, yet so greedy. Haewon is resting on her back, with her elbows lifting her abdomen just a little from the bedsheet, enough to face you without much eye movement, smiling with desire. She bends her left leg a little, and it drives you crazy.

Fuck, she’s the most beautiful woman in the world, perhaps ranked among the gods: Hera, Artemis, Athena, Hestia, and Haewon’s victory is a certainty. She can even go bar for bar against Aphrodite, her own creator, under this cheap room lamp. And you can’t just wait to be tied to this lady with her deity-defying charm with such an intimate act.

“You want my cock that bad, Miss Oh?” You slowly, to make it a tease, slide your knees against the bedsheet towards Haewon, getting closer to her, inch by inch. Haewon opens her leg, giving you permission and space to be in her proximity. Her eden is now in view, glistened with arousal.

“There’s just this thing, ma’am, that I wanna take a sample of first.” Playfulness is attached in your message. She’s still on her elbows, heads slightly tilted at your defiance, as if you also have a god-challenging act in your pocket as well. And with some more inspection, it’s apparent that Haewon isn’t a firm believer in having cleanly-shaved hair, and somehow, this kind of nature just drives you into a frenzy.

“And what is it, mister?” Haewon asks, still with seduction, eyes locking on yours.

“You.” And without another word, you dive face first onto her wet, needy sex. Your nose is pressed against her mound, pubic hair brushes against it, but the “distraction” never succeeds in repelling you away. Further, it feeds the ferocity inside you to take in her scent, with a deep breath. With the sight alone, you thought you reached your limit, yet, spellbound under her musk, a hint of sweat, the honey-scented body wash, and her mildly tart aroma from the inside sends you into a literal mind break, like a morning coffee. Haewon is fucking addictive, and you can’t go a single day without her smell.

“She s–smells good, doesn’t s–she?” Her voice starts to quiver again, as your nose tickles her hair.

Meanwhile, your tongue, with a mind of its own, is lapping up her nectar, savoring the salty, tangy taste of her canal. Her sensitive nub, the one you’re sure it’s clitoris, is now stuck in your philtrum. Every swipe just grazes it, eliciting squeals from her.

“F–fuck.” Haewon cries out, starting to get lost in her immediate pleasure, “Ah.”, and your enthusiasm. “Just f-five minutes babe.”

Mouth busy in a sinful act, you hum an affirmative note out. Her vagina is now coated with your saliva, mixed with her lubricant. And with each time you pull yourself out, there’s sometimes a string of the cocktail connecting your lips to her sex - a thread between you and her.

At first, it’s a savoring session of her taste, for you, but as her wailing grows louder, you can only be curious about the limit. And without hesitation, you give her clitoris a brush - the same way you suck her nipple. As your lips contact, delicate, her moans would reach such a forte to the point you’re quite sure that everyone in the dorm would be able to hear.

Conspiring her frustration, “Want a few more, babe?”, you retreat your ministrations to her pale thighs, making a few marks here and there, robbing the pleasure that was once hers.

“Fuck you.” Haewon groans out. “Please, keep eating my pussy, please.”

You bring your fingers into play, caressing her inner trunks. And, with instinct, you slip yourself under her ass. Your eyes are still locking on her wet hole, and she seems to gush out streams of honey now. “Y–You are f–fucking insuf–” She moans out as you relentlessly withholding the release she deserves.

“Can’t hear with my hands under your ass, babe” It’s as if something possessed you into a womanizer, a shot of complacency.

Haewon would be able to muster up her remaining inhibition to define you with an adjective. “I–Insufferable.”

“That’s a little mean.” Your hands give her firm butt a squeeze, feeling the soft flesh. This is probably how Indiana Jones felt when he got his hand on the golden idol: like an ascendant. “Considering how soft your ass is.” You lick just beside the spot, motioning parallel to the pink labia.

Haewon groans in frustration, climax stolen by a thief. “Sh–shut the fuck up and put that tongue to use!” In forte, all the pent up energy can crush you into bits and pieces in minutes, while you are still drawing circles around your supposed target, pushing her to the edge of wrath, right before it turns into destruction. “FUCK!”

You are actually scared of her now, and perhaps the complaints of her neighbors about some tenant bossing a guest around in the nocturne. So, complying, you put your tongue to use, taking another sample of the mixture, tasting her and yourself again.

“Good boy, yeah, like that.” She whimpered out, being put back en route to paradise.

Constant pace, don’t go too fast. You tell yourself an advice you’ve read somewhere years ago, and you do as it says. You try to keep the speed the same, but it’s starting to get harder as Haewon decides that she needs something to hold on to, which is, unfortunately, your head. I once had a guy go too fast when I told him I’m gonna cum, and that was the ride down, my mood died completely. A comment you’ve seen somewhere pops up.

Your jaw can never get tired, if it is to devour her into ecstasy. But the force pressed upon your head is starting to be a double-edged sword to her, a place to hold on to, and the act that might close the golden gate.

The five minutes she gave earlier might come into use.

“B—babe.” You cry out between licks, voice muffled. “I wanna use my cock now.”

Haewon lets go of the grip she has in your hair locks, as she looks down from her lying position. “Really?” Expectations running high, she asked.

“Yeah.”

“Alright.” She thwarts her arm along the bed for a little while, a little lost, until she catches her colorful spot-covered pillow. And without any word, you help Haewon lift her hips up to insert the fluffy object below, bringing her puckered hole into your focus.

Tranced, “Can I taste it?” the words fell out without any restrictions.

“Don’t fucking kiss me again if you do; I don’t wanna taste my asshole.” Haewon commands, trying to regain her composure. “Maybe another day.”

You whine out. “Ugh, fine.” Before getting on your knees for the main event.

You use her spread thighs as a handle while aiming with your eyes. You line up your twitching digit on the center, resting it on her now-swollen clit. And a small whimper from Haewon would reach your ear, fueling your fire.

“You want this inside you, huh?” You tease, sliding your shaft against her core from the outside, glazing yourself with her honey resting on the nub.

“Fuck… yeah, I—I want it inside.” Haewon chokes out at your heavenly connection; her attempt at putting any façade is crumbling.

Slowly, your rod still above her center, you traverse your hands up her immaculate legs, onto her stomach. Her breaths are now short, out of any earlier rhythm, as your touch starts to overwhelm her senses. “F—fuck.” You’d only move upwards, creeping up her beautiful chest, until they are up for your hands to conquer. She’s yours now.

Now, you have her tits as a grip, ever so carefully fondling them while slowly juggling the movements: your hands squeezing, your hip thrusting, and your upper body leaning in to see her giving in closer and closer. It’s all there, eyes fluttering, lips shaking, loud moaning, and her whole firm frame writhing under you.

You aren’t going in for a kiss, really, but she forces you nonetheless. Hands gripping the sides of your head, Haewon would scream from the overstimulation, all restricted in your mouths, into you, letting out any control she has left.

“Babe.” You mutter out. And even slightly distorted by fervor, she’d break off from the locks under your voice.

Mouth agape, she looks into your eyes, using the final bit of her inhibition to predict your next words. “You can put it in, baby.” And you can only smile.

You guide your rod down to her engine, but neither of you has ever been more ready to ignite the moans. Your left hand has her thigh on the same side as a handle.

Wet, indeed, she welcomes you. The excessive preparation gives easy access, and you become the same groaning lump as she was, swallowed by rapture. In the wake of bliss, you tilt your head down until the sight of your disappearing cock is in the frame, inch by inch.

The insides of her tighten when you reach halfway, and you can feel your tip grazing a rough patch. “Fuck!” Haewon’s body tenses up, and she lets out a higher note than usual. You also pitch a sound lower than hers, but also noticeably higher than your regular octave.

You slowly bury yourself up to the hilt, now able to let go of your flesh. Haewon stutters a moan out when your patch makes contact with her.

“S–Seems like you can handle all of me, babe.” Your voice is quivering, without any movement to your body. You keep yourself whole with her.

Haewon can only whimper in response.

“I-I’ll start fucking you now.” You say as you start to grind your hips back. Haewon nods, giving you the right to control the pace.

Your cock, at an agonizing speed, comes back into view. You can feel the muscles inside gripping you and how the rough patch grazes the top of your digit, evoking staccatos from her. God, anyone would kill to be in your position right now.

And at the halfway point, it’s where you push back in again, still carefully. Haewon surrenders any power she has now, with her g-spot being pleasured by another person for the first time. The suffocating squeeze she has on you persists, sending waves of pleasure around your dick.

It becomes a loop: retreat and thrust, retreat and thrust, and you finally find your rhythm. It’s ecstatic - the way her flesh embraces you. You repay her accommodation with a little angling, aiming for the sensitive patch in the second step. Both of you are lost now, blinded by the passionate endeavor you’re engaging in.

Haewon’s brain can only register euphoria, howling as your tip brushes against the g-spot. And you are no better, bucking hips back and forth, chasing your release while huffing out such notes you could hit before the existence of your Adam’s apple. The only concern now is that your roller coaster would reach its peak before hers.

“Hey, I t–think I’m gonna c–cum now.” Haewon’s words came out tattered, divided by exaltations in her groans. It's a heaven’s message, as you can also feel your climax close by.

Keep your pace; don’t go faster.

You make no attempt to go rougher with your drilling; she’s already a blushing, wailing mess under Allegro Vivace. You can also feel a knot starting to form inside of you, begging to be untangled. “M–Me too, babe.”

Haewon’s moans become even louder than the oral session minutes ago; her orgasm is close by. You can feel the way her vagina contracts around your movements, and you aren’t far from it, either.

Two lost souls search for intimacy, and they eventually find each other. And the mistakes they’ve made don't matter anymore. The people they’ve passed through, either able to find solace or dissonance, have become nothing more than a plot device to drive them forward, for them to meet. And even if the future remains clouded, it’s just them at this exact moment, becoming each other’s sanctuary.

“FUCK!” Haewon cries out. As her hip convulses, bending your digit slightly. She pulls her legs back, feet touching her pale ass before they go up in the air. Haewon cums, violent, ferocious, cathartic. Her whole body tenses up; her tits are shaking. Her walls tighten around you, begging to milk every upcoming drop of you until dry.

You take in the view but can only register a few words to describe how you feel right now: fuck, and god. She screams from the top of her lungs to accommodate such pleasure. And isn’t it a symphony that’s so pleasing to hear, knowing that they are products of your doings?

Haewon’s breathing starts to slow down, but seeing how she becomes undone beneath, you quicken your thrusts to chase the high you’re anticipating. “Fuck!” Under sensitivity, Haewon squeals.

“Do you want me to slow down, babe? I can still cum no matter the pace.” With care, you ask.

“I–I wanna t–try.” Her syllables come out in stutters, “Keep going.”, as your length rams into her cunt even faster than before her high.

You keep your fast, lively tempo, and that seems to be the right choice. You can play the melody faster, yet you already fail to register all the fucks and shits, Haewon mutters out while being pounded. You’re guided by your intuition at this point. It builds up inside your stomach, calling to be broken free. You feel your legs wobbling like jello, and your awareness of whether there’s any left, opposite Haewon’s, has left your body already.

And with a single, final thrust, “FUCK!” you bend yourself down to capture her lips, screeching all the satisfaction from your high into her mouth. Spurts of cum released into her welcoming cunt, while you basically buried yourself inside her, twitching under orgasm. Haewon moans into your mouth at each of your vibrations. Lustful, your tongues are swirling inside each other’s mouth, tasting each other as much as you can.

Thick cum is still discharged into her, painting her insides with white. And slowly, you start to slide down from the precipice. Your cock still twitches inside her cunt; the remaining cum only dribbles out from the hardness now. The kiss remains magnetic; you two are too hungry for each other. You can only taste the mint candy from earlier.

Finally, it breaks, a string of saliva connects your lips together, as both of you are bathed in the afterglow. Haewon’s face is drenched from her own sweat, panting, and smiling. “I love you.” She mouths, trying to make sense of her heart rhythm, soft breaths touching your face.

You’re still panting, attempting to take in her words. Even if they’re the same as from the beginning, when the clothes are still barriers between you, it sears you this time. A lock has been solved, yet you are still questioning the contents inside the box.

Then, you realize that it’s your heart, “I love you too, babe.”, and it can explode right here. Love floods, lust flows, binding you two together, in the vast sea of possibilities.

Haewon smiles before pulling you into another kiss. This one is much less passionate than the ones preceding, but it’s, nonetheless, affectionate. The way she captures your lips is too confident for you to be unsure about the attachment she gives you, and that might be the first time in your life that you’re so certain of someone else’s love, and her name is Oh Hae-Won.

Exhausted and spent, you let yourself fall onto her side, looking up. Your left arm is resting on her collarbones. “Fuck.” Your vocabulary seems to shrink under ecstasy as the cadence rings too loud for you to think properly.

“That was fun.” Haewon scoffs, before turning her bare frame towards you, head resting on her hand. “We should do this more often.”

“Should? I’m fucking you everywhere, babe.” You reaffirm with a simper.

“Shit.” Haewon chuckles before seeming to remember something. She quickly gets up from the bed. “I’ll go pissing first. It’s this–”

“UTI. Yeah, I’ve read about it.” You cut her off to show off your knowledge of sex education. “Can we cuddle after?” You plead, attempting to make a cute face.

“Sure.” She laughs, pointing at you. “If you don’t mind having your back getting a bit wet.”, and you can only smile back at her. Haewon would saunter out to her bathroom with a slight limp, managing to sway her reddened cheeks. Fuck.

And despite the low light, you can see drops of your cum, dribbling a shine down her legs. “Are you going to clean th–”

“No.” She winks before disappearing into the bathroom, leaving a trail of nectar in her path.

You bite your lip in another rise of your arousal.

–

You hear the sound of tap water running from inside the bathroom before the lock clicks. Haewon appears in front of your eyes again, still naked.

“I kept the promise.” She says.

Immediately, still on her bed, you press your vision down her body. Her pussy remains glistened with your white cum, mixed with her tangy lubricant. Perhaps your saliva is also blended into the liquid.

“God, Haewon.” Again, your mind goes blank. “It has been just five minutes. I really can’t do that.”

Haewon chuckles, swaying her alluring hips closer to you. “I know.” Before she pounces you on the bed, staining the sheets with your fluids. Haewon prints a few kisses here and there, usually in the proximity of your lips and neck. And, in disbelief, you watch over her body to see that the five-minute gap is enough for your cock to be ready again.

“Fuck.”

Haewon’s glance follows yours to your erection.

“Another round, babe?”

–

Six: Just Another Girl

–

Now why can’t I sleep at night?

And why don’t the moon look right?

–

Sunlight peeks through the gap in your curtains, casting on the blanket that’s covering any visual hints of last night’s debauchery. Her arms retain their restrictive nature, an environment you’d enthusiastically enlist for. Her fingers barely interlocking on your heart, feeling the thrumming lullaby she holds on to like the greatest hits.

Her chest is pressed against your back, and the fact that you notice this (and how you savored their peaks last night with such unbeatable hunger) only entices your morning wood to last longer than it should’ve. You snuggle into her embrace further, establishing yourself as hers and pressing yourself into her perky breasts even harder, wanting to feel every inch of them.

“Hmm?” Haewon finally wakes up, fading her tightness wrapped around you.

Slightly panicked, you grab her escaping hand onto your warm skin. “Hey.” And you greeted her.

Haewon chuckles. “Oh, this boy needs a hug, huh?”

You close your eyes and hum in agreement, since her embrace becomes another gesture you’ve grown to love now, even if it was discovered just a few minutes ago.

“How was last night, my baby boy?” She questioned you with a tiny simper.

You can only chuckle along. “Cathartic, babe, but I’m not doing the whole mommy thing right now.”

Haewon laughs. “Okay, fine, I’ll ask you properly later, though.”

The cuddle went on for minutes. You are unwilling to let her go after such intimacy you had. After a while, you notice the scar on your chest. This may be the time you show her, but you need bravery. And you’re not sure if love could muster it up.

[A paragraph demonstrating Haewon’s good influence on you and how you’ve influenced her]

“I wanna tell you something, with us being this bare and such.” You gathered a little courage to speak up, adamantly attempting to show her your so-called scar.

Haewon would let out a tiny chuckle at your cheap joke. “Unload them to me, babe.” She lets out another tiny chuckle, resting her head on a makeshift stand of her fist. You can’t help but join along with her.

“Oh my god, fuck you.” You said, along with a laugh.

“You just did.”

“Okay, okay, I’ll start now, don't distract me this ti—" You let out a small giggle, as she’s still soaked in her own hilarity. “It’s like seven years of story; trust me, it’s more fun than you’d think.”

“Seven years? Is it like, a long-term heartbreak or something, and what’s with you making everything into a story, catastrophic or not.” Haewon asks.

“Well—” You contemplate - whether to spoil the ending for her or not, but she can probably guess by the way you purposefully hold out the information in lieu of instantly answering. “Seven years ago, in late April, I just started high school.”

You can see the late morning sunlight reflected in her eyes, single-minded on your tale.

“You want me to close the curtains first?” You direct your thumb toward the gap.

“No need, plus, you look better with the light.” She smiles, sincerity can be felt from it, maybe it’s the way the light drapes on your right half of her face.

“Thanks, babe, okay, where was I— Yeah, seven years ago, late April, high school.”

–

“And then I met you.”

“You know that you’re the asshole in this one, right?” Haewon hits you with such a question.

Certainty of a weeping eluded, “Fuck, not even a single tear?”

“Wow, this lack of self-awareness is concerning, babe, and this is out of love.” She scoffs. “You’re the bad guy here.”

“Look, I’ve been telling myself about the same statement since that day, so yeah, Haewon, I’m aware that I’m the asshole in this story.”

“Were you hurt by it or something?” Haewon asks with genuine curiosity, she caught the sadness in your tone, yet unable to make sense of it. Her head remains resting on her fist, albeit making a ninety degrees apart from you.

“I— yeah, I know it was my fault, but—“ You avert her gaze, staring at the blanket covering her midriff. “It was five years, almost. And it still hurts sometimes whenever I see something that reminds me of her.”

Haewon would give you a blank expression; her next words are unpredictable.

“I kinda— get the idea? You can’t deal with college life, so she becomes a–no, the source for you to vent shit. And one day, it became too much, with that fight making it wor–no, apparent.” It’s nothing short of incredible that she gets all of it within the first iteration and gives you the much-needed feedback (even if you’ve already considered this possibility).

“And she wants you to get better. She didn’t think she could be the person you could rely on anymore. This is how I see it.” With ease, Haewon recounts the most plausible explanation, the one you’ve been avoiding accepting.

“Yeah, it’s…” You resist the urge to argue with her point, realizing that such emotional manipulation cannot work. Perhaps the amount of self-awareness poured in just doesn’t work anymore. “You’re right.”

“There’re some points that I… kinda understand you? Like the whole being insecure stuff, but all of this is just a shitshow, babe. You even write a fic about it.” A tiny simper leaves her mouth.

“Spielberg made a film about his parent’s divorce; Taylor Swift has, well…”

“Steven’s was like… sixty years? And I think Taylor can be an asshole, to be honest, aside from All Too Well.” Haewon replied without a delay.

“Agree to disagree.” You can only sigh afterward, and maybe it’s the way your breath taps on her chest more heavily than it should or the way you avert the eye contact you’ve been maintaining.

“Hey, are you okay?” Her doe eyes hints concern, while the fingers lightly caress your cheek.

Destined, your tears well up just a little, but enough for you to detect and hold back. “Kinda.”

Haewon lets out a sigh, the back of her free fingers still fondling your cheek. “I’m sure you’ve changed.”

“It's been more than two years now.” Your lips quiver. “B–But telling you here, it’s just…”

Like the first time with your therapist, like the first time you tell your colleagues, your tears are always on the hinge as the story ends.

“I know I can’t fix it - this whole weird love-hate relationship of yours.” She finally sits up. “But I know you aren’t the person you were.” Your cheeks are suddenly cupped by both of her hands. “And as long as you… try to be better, I’ll be with you.” Haewon ends her speech with a caring look.

Nothing in her deliverance is poetry-worthy; they’re basic quotes you’d find in the self-help books. Though, the words not coming from some self-centered guy melts the cynic inside you, and that’s when tears start to fall.

“I also know that it hurts, even if you’re the one who’s wrong.” She softly cheers up.

Through the sobs, “Y–You’re quite di–direct, babe.” You try to wipe the tears off your watering eyes.

She lets out a sympathetic titter. “I’m not the best at this, sorry.”

“I-It’s fine. Thanks for being here.” You succumb to the lamentation, crying your heart out, as Haewon embraces you. Maybe it’s the way you’re naked on someone else’s bed, maybe it’s the way her chest presses up against your chin, or perhaps it’s the way she puts her leg over yours as if she’s using a side pillow, but you’ve never felt more vulnerable in your life. And you’re probably being engulfed by it under the right person.

–

Epilogue: Keeping Tabs

–

I wish I never met you.

You are the worst thing that I’m still

Keeping tabs on for some stupid reason.

–

“It’s quite a lot of stations, babe. Are you sure about this?”

“Yeah–”

It was your birthday two days ago. How old are you now, twenty-five? Three years after graduation, you rejected a job offer from Japan because you didn't want to leave your girlfriend. Not that it was a wrong choice, since the number of fights, sex, and after-fight, angry, heated sex between you and Haewon sits on the average rate.

Further, not having to buy a plane ticket every time you want to see your parents, or your friends is definitely a plus. Just a few hours after the plane landed in Narita, you want to break Japan’s immigration law. God, those streets are miles better than what you have at home.

It seems that trying to reach Odaiba Beach from Meguro Sky Garden takes an hour, plus walking. Sure, it’s ninety minutes to sunset, but you can feel doubts in her voice and your own. It’s the few final days, and all of your words hyping this exact place up only make her feral.

“Maybe we can make it if we start walking now, instead of like– arguing over this.”

Haewon shoots you a glare. “This trip would go to waste if we can’t make it before sunset.” And she takes a step towards you, pointing at your chest. The sun still casts a long shadow of her on the ground.

“Waste?” You arch your eyebrows. “Says the one who spent a whole fucking day at Shinjuku to sweep Uniqlo’s stocks.”

The wind blows over the metal fence, assorted colors of leaves swirling around you.

Her eyes remain fixated on you, before giving an apologetic expression. “Yeah that’s fair. It’s a bit of a quickfire for me on that.”

You snap a photo of her before replying. “Those cardigans are cheaper here anyway, don’t worry.”

She reaches for your camera, X-E4, examining the image of her, and smiles. “Let’s go.” Before leading you, handheld, to the elevator down from the garden.

–

“God.”

“It seems like we’re here at the right time” You speak, before taking another photo of Haewon, showered under the orange of the setting sun.

Haewon is left speechless at the sight in front of her: Rainbow Bridge, salmon sky from the sunset, tinged with clouds, some purple, red, orange. You think it’s probably from some kind of refraction. People aren’t scarce, but to say that there’s a crowd is an overstatement. It’s pretty much the same as in your memory from five years ago. How are the people in my photos doing now?

Similar to the last time, when the breakup was just over a month, you take in the view. It’s just that you aren’t basked in melancholy anymore. Sure, you’re still keeping tabs on her every few months, but it’s nothing more than a blocklist check. You aren’t ready to face Minji, really, and not seeing each other again would be a kind gesture by the gods. However, the hate etched into your wrists isn’t quite as visible anymore.

Still, you can’t play down her impact on your life. In spite of the indirect nature of the teachings, you learned how to love and what to do with one.

“I’ll be back, babe. I’ll see if I can swim to the bridge from here.” Haewon speaks out, like the first encounter, snapping you out of your trance.

Shook, “I’ll wait here; make sure not to get swept into the sea.”, and you joke, smiling.

“See ya.” Haewon grins back, gesturing a goodbye, before stepping out towards the water.

–

[A few paragraphs leading up to the encounter with Minji again; yeah, it’s a little anticlimactic for you to see this in your first read, sorry]

You failed to say a word to her, and there may not be any second chance for this.

It’s funny, miles away from where you’ve feared most. No soul in the world would’ve expected this.

The sun continues on its path, too busy rushing to make its predetermined setting time, ergo apathetic to the colors it casts onto the sky and the way Minji is elegantly bathed by it. Her features are frozen, you alike, mouth slightly ajar. Waves crashing onto the sand keep filling in the silence between you, each encouraging your heart to push out a syllable you’re choking. There’s no battle on who would give in to snapping back into reality first since the argument on the encounter being a dream is too plausible.

Though less often as time goes on, Minji has been your recurring nocturnal figure. Occasionally, she appears as the one who has disregarded your cries during those final days – unresponsive, cold, unaware of your collapse. If not, it’s you and her enamored in what you’ve always wanted her to see, conversing like high school students again. Either way, you usually classify the world surrounding you as nightmares after the alarms are off, almost always with tears welling and ragged breaths, as if her presence alone is enough to give vitality to your nights.

But if this is a lucid dream, both of you would’ve laughed by now, under the Odaiba Beach sunset. Memories are washed away into the sea, making way for you to run along the shoreline, free from any grievances. You wouldn’t go as far as saying that it could’ve been her on the flight here with you, even if the potential of it touches you in more than one way.

The bewilderment of meeting her in where’s supposed to be your sanctuary hasn’t faded one bit. It clouds the fact that she has preserved her high ponytail. She grips her denim jacket ever so tightly while slightly parting aside from the center, revealing a pitch-black turtleneck shirt beneath. The brown string crossing her body is holding her likely expensive handbag resting on the side of her hips. All of these are topped with beige, all-creased pants, undercut with sneakers of the same color, or not, you don’t seem to care anymore.

Voice notes and texts are woven into a tapestry, the one you and she cut as your paths diverged. Yet, your threads, somehow, have been remaining set to interlock with each other again after all this time. The track was divided into a parallel, just with a sea of hatred, sometimes reflecting a spark of care.

It’s still clear as day, the way she left you blind, likely without remorse, any glimmer of hope was eradicated with blocks on social media. The way you tell the version of your story enough times for you to find the median and average spot where people would start to cry. And not that you were left unshaken with each iteration; you just stop before giving in to the sorrow hanging off the edge of your tear ducts. And at one point, it became another tale, a cult classic to you.

Still, this is no place and time to assert your wounds anymore. It’s Tokyo, and five years have passed. Getting one over her shouldn’t matter anymore, you know that. What’s left to achieve in triumph is just plunging the dagger into yourself once more, revisiting how shaken you have been without her for all these years. And three, you’re the one on the wrong side.

Plus, it’s not so awful that she left, even if it casts you in a state of bereft in the first few months. You deleted her photos, and both of you blocked each other. You learned to collect yourself up again, shredding what was once shared while coming to terms with the ones rooted in the essence of you, learning to let them be shared with others. The cadence doesn’t entirely sound like it was, yet it’s what you’ve accepted as days pass.

You still hate her; it’s a known fact. I fucking hate you rings true to this day - a half-thought during a fire burned into your wrists, calling out to be crossed off. Guilt, shame, and self-loathing have been rooting off it, yet you can’t bleed the source out.

In the shadows that the sun cast, you feel a twitch in the corner of your mouth - the determination to conceal any hints of glee at her presence is trying to keep itself afloat. Another gulp in your throat only delays the inevitable; your cheek is trembling from an unknown feeling. It’s teasing the brim. It’s tasting the uncertainty. It’s towering over your hatred. And it brings the nocturnal summer wind that embraced you on the first day at high school, the day she picked up her name tag when everything was in the right place.

“Kim Min-Ji.” Your teacher called as she stood up to pick up her name tag.

“I like you.”

And it flows through you–

“Him? Not really.”

“God, you suck at badminton.” You did “outscore” her by quite a margin (twenty-one to six).

–all the words you’ve said–

“I’ll probably be a doctor. You haven’t chosen yours yet?”

–all the words she has said–

“I think she’s the one.” (She wasn’t.)

“These early mornings are killing me.” Her high school project was killing her.

“Yeah, I can’t be bothered with all this studying. I’ll probably make some nice portfolio and pray.”

–all the dreams drawn together–

“If someone wants to enter here, they can just look at these pics and follow the instructions. It might not be for everyone, I guess. I still wish I could help them, though.”

“I really fucked up a lot during quarantine, like my mental state was dwindling.”

“Now I’m going to be a tired doctor all my life.” She scoffs, downplaying her success.

“This place is filled with rich people.”

–all the struggles vented–

“God, I look so pretty in this.” The red lipstick looks good on her; you wish you knew the exact shade.

“We need to recreate this photo; you stand here.”

“See ya.” She said, not knowing it would be the last time you would see each other face to face.

“Really fucking drunk right nowww, just wanna say you’re one of the best friends I’ve ever had, like definitely top five, haha.” It was a drunk text in a bar under the blaring music.

–all the love proclaimed–

“I’ll probably have to study another year. You’re still invited to my graduation, though. We’d be like twenty-six by then, right?”

“I’m sorry.”

“I shouldn’t have done that, too.”

“I fucking hate you.” The line that became a part of you ever since.

–and the ending.

“Don’t message me anymore; just go live your life separately. Have a pleasant life.”

Are you sure to delete 525 photos permanently?

This action cannot be undone.

Delete Permanently

It’s as if someone made a supercut of you two.

It's excruciating, the way it seeps through your brain, the same one that hung you to be ravaged by the abyss. A wave of serotonin washes over your face, sheathed within the Tokyo Bay’s serenity. And a smile forms, over five years of her name being a crucifixion. It’s you breaking the cadence, and you can only beg her to accept it.

Alas, you have never been in the position to ask for anything. You’ve always been the convict in the sad songs supposed to bury you under their alphabets, robbing the sorrow you meant to drown into. You are her mistake, one that she’s likely so enthusiastic to cross off in her diary.

Yet, under the setting sun, in such a foreign place, and after years of it, maybe she forgets, maybe she forgives, or perhaps she doesn’t care about it. But if even it is written in the sand of Odaiba Beach, it would also be etched on the same wound you see on your pulse, that Kim Min-Ji reciprocates your smile, with a chuckle even, back bent forward the same way you remember to accommodate such elation.

And free from conviction, you are. It’s not the late-night, thumbs-on-keyboard kind of relationship anymore, neither being two free spirits against the world; it’s two people, unshackled from grudges. It’s the closure in the same veins of La La Land, a tapestry of love remains, despite the zeroes and ones translated as blocks, plus the frontal lobe chemicals interpreted as detestations. There has always been a part of you that cares - under the miles of self-loathing from guilt and the despise entrenched in you.

As cued, the setting sun is refracted in the drop of tear grazing your left cheek. She seems fine, even if she’s drowned in her droplets, thirty, forty, or fifty—you aren’t sure anymore—meters away from the idyllic waves. It won’t be the same, and it can never be. Years of walling each other out only dims any remaining glimmer. But here you are, under the Tokyo sun, laughing and crying on such an unfortunate encounter.

You aren’t fourteen again. It doesn’t feel like the first day or the first words of you two. It’s two grief-stricken adults with a shared past. Both cannot hold on to their grudges, though, just you being an asshole for having them.

You aren’t her mistake after all, and she’s not your mistake anymore.

And it’s not witty, but it would suffice.

“Hey.”

—

“That was her, right?”

“Yeah.”

“How was it? I see that you guys were kinda smiling.”

You ponder for a moment, a little too long before Haewon would ask again.

“It ends well, right?”

“I suppose so.”

—

I need to get over you.

—

#minji angst #newjeans angst #haewon smut #nmixx smut #kpop fanfic

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strwberri-milk · 4 months ago

Note

Hii could I maybe request the lads boys and sugar daddies 🤭🤭

It's okay if you don't tho I understand it's not something everyone is comfortable with :)

im understanding this as lads AS sugar daddies but also im like. thinking about it and these are gonna be kinda short bc i just dont see anybody really being a sugar daddy so these are. very general. fun fact - xaviers is based off a fic premise i never wrote

Zayne definitely has the capital to be a sugar daddy and he's heard amongst the other doctors that there are some others who have arrangements. He judges them at first, thinking that it's not something he'd really think he's comfortable dealing with. He learns that things don't have to be purely sexual a night or two of him feeling extraordinarily lonely he decides maybe he could just see if he could find someone to spend time with.

Against his better judgement he meets you, someone who invigorates him mentally and enjoys spending his time with you. Your allowance is incredibly generous and you were expecting him to escalate with each nice dinner he takes you to but he's never made a move on you. He's a perfect gentleman and he makes sure you understand that all he wants from you is your time, however much it costs.

The only way Xavier could end up in this situation is by pure accident. He downloads an app, thinking it was just a way to make friends online. He assumes that payments are for some sort of membership, swiping around until he finds your profile and decides to start chatting with you.

The two of you have a lot in common and when you two meet up for the first time you're glad that he looks a lot younger than you anticipated with the blurry profile photo and slightly outdated shorthand in texting. He sort of slips into the role in a similar manner, paying for your dinners and buying you things that remind him of you.

You don't really think he knows what he's become, especially since you don't receive a traditional allowance of money. You don't mind at all thankfully, fully accepting all of his gifts and meals in exchange for his companionship. Honestly, you don't look at him as a sugar daddy because of how casual everything is, cherishing his friendship as you get to know him.

Rafayel totally does it as a whim. He decides to download an app for fun, not really into dating period. He doesn't like the way that people fawn over him, or try to pretend that they don't care he's rich despite insisting meeting at fancy restaurants and looking at him expectantly to foot the bill.

You agree to a date with Rafayel because not only is he famous, he's stupid pretty. You decide that spending time with him would definitely not be an awful thing to do. Your first date is formal and you try to wow him with knowledge of his paintings. He doesn't seem very interested but the two of you seem to get along, thankfully.

Over time the two of you become more friendly, Rafayel letting his walls down more as the two of you become more honest with each other. He's very kind with his money and you're paid very generously. He finally has a sort of friend outside of Thomas and genuinely likes bugging you, you not minding the extra attention he gives you in addition to the money you're paid.

Sylus is constantly fighting off people trying to flirt with him to enter some sort of arrangement. He exudes both wealth and power so of course people are going to be obsessed with him. He usually brushes them all off, not caring, honestly.

He happens to come across you during an evening of drinking. You're trying to flirt with him, not knowing anything about him other than you think he's a very attractive man. He knows that you don't know him with how forward you are, touching and batting your lashes at him flirtatiously.

He ends up deciding to buy you some drinks and the two of you talk well into the night. He gives you his number to talk to him again, telling you that he'd make sure it was worth your time. When you get home that night you find a package addressed to you. A beautiful set of clothes and jewels that fit you perfectly along with an invitation for an event in the week.

This becomes standard for the two of you and you love it. Being on his arm prevents Sylus from getting accosted from people that are desperate for his attention and you're constantly spoiled by his money. You both benefit, growing closer with each other over time.

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wikiangela · 6 months ago

Text

"I'm going to ask Tommy to marry me." Buck says out of the blue one random evening, sitting in Eddie's living room, spread out in the armchair, sipping a beer, eyes on the TV, where Eddie and Christopher are playing a video game. His tone is even and firm, not even a hint of hesitation, it's not a huge revelation, or even a decision he's made just now. He's been thinking about it for weeks, maybe months. He doesn't know why he says it now, it just slips out - maybe he just needed to talk to his best friend about it.

"Really?" he hears a hint of surprise in Eddie's voice, but when he looks at his best friend, he's still focused on trying to beat his son at the game. He's smiling, sparing a glance at Buck. "That's great, Buck."

"Yeah?" he breathes out, feeling even more settled now. He wasn't nervous, exactly, but still felt kind of like he did when he came out to Eddie. Like he just wanted his best friend to approve, to support him - and he had no doubt he would.

"Of course," Eddie answers easily. "You guys are perfect together, and you love each other, and if you're sure you want to spend the rest of your life with Tommy, yeah, go for it. I'm happy for you," he adds, finally looking at Buck, a soft, genuine smile on his face. Christopher uses this moment to win the game, and Eddie groans at his triumphant yell. "Aw, not fair, Buck distracted me." Both Buck and Chis laugh, while Eddie pouts for a moment, before a smile breaks through anyway.

"Well, I won." Chris shrugs with a grin. "And I think it'd be so cool if you and Tommy get married," he adds, moving his attention to Buck.

"Yeah?" Buck repeats, his smile even wider now. Having two of his favorite people not only really love his partner - Buck's pretty sure Tommy's the first one to spend so much time with all of them together, and it feeling so right - but also approve of Buck wanting to tie him into their family forever.

"Duh, Tommy's the coolest." Chris rolls his eyes. "Better lock him down while you can," he jokes, and Buck gasps in surprise. He's such a teenager.

"Wow, rude. He's not going anywhere." he shakes his head with a laugh. That much he's sure of, for the first time in his life he's not scared of getting left, of his partner getting bored or fed up. He knows Tommy's gonna be right at his side no matter what.

"Not if you put a ring on it." Eddie joins his son's teasing. Laughing, Buck reaches over to the table to pick up a chip from a bowl and throw it at Eddie, who dodges it as it lands somewhere on the couch. "Hey!"

"But seriously, you don't think it's too soon?" Buck asks after a moment, a little bit of nerves seeping into his tone. He's more than sure about wanting to marry Tommy. He's just a little scared that he's gonna freak him out. They have talked about this, about their future, what they want out of this relationship, out of life, but they never really discussed any timelines, and Buck might be a little in his head about this. Hence why he needed to talk to someone about it, probably.

"Buck, you've been together for over a year. Some people get married after less." Eddie raises an eyebrow. "When you know, you know." He shrugs, and Buck releases a breath. Because he does know. He has known for a long time now.

"So you think he'll say yes?" Buck asks, but he knows the answer before Eddie has a chance to roll his eyes with fond exasperation. Tommy loves him. He loves Tommy so much his heart wants to burst out of his chest and live in Tommy's. Tommy is his forever, he's sure of it, and he knows that when he asks, and it's going to be very soon, he'll get a positive answer.

"He'll say yes." Eddie says with a small shake of his head and a wide smile. "Now, two important questions from me: who's gonna be your best man, and do you need help planning and picking out a ring?"

#bucktommy fic #wikiangela writes #platonic buddie #wanted to try writing something short for once #and this one has been on my mind for WEEKS #I need to write some more supportive bestie eddie #(I kinda wanna turn it into a longer fic now ughhh)#bucktommy #bucktommy drabble #kinley #tevan #dailykinley #evan buckley #tommy kinard #eddie diaz #christopher diaz #platonic buck and eddie

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raguiras · 5 months ago

Text

POV: Deuce's very first kiss from his crush

(Click for better quality)

I'm finally officially introducing my Yuu/OC x canon/Yumeship here! (✿◕‿◕) Writing this post took me forever, but I'm super happy with it!

Reblogs are super appreciated hehehe

Please be kind & DO NOT take inspiration from this ship. ^^"

(While Allen isn't me, I'm calling them a Yumeship because he's based on my younger self/me when I first started playing TWST & because the ship gives me a ridiculous amount of comfort!)

Allen x Deuce (aka Spade of Storms) is my ultimate comfort ship and they mean a ton to me.

These two are best friends who become lovers and closely mirror each other. Deuce is the delinquent with rather bad self-control who tries to be a model student, while Allen is a former honor student who's now a very lowkey delinquent with stellar self-control and a mature attitude.

Due to the fact that Allen and Deuce are so similar and yet the opposite of each other, they're able to excellently understand and support the other, and they help each other accept themselves.

Their ship blog: @spade-of-storms (facts, drabbles & more est. May 2024)

Now why exactly are these two perfect for each other? Well...

LONG TEXT AHEAD!

♤♤♤♤♤♤♤♤♤♤

Deuce:

Allen supports Deuce with all his heart. Instead of believing that someone "as stupid and temperamental" as Deuce could never become an honor student, Allen fully believes in him and encourages him. In comparison to when other people say it, these words actually have an incredibly strong impact on Deuce and are believable to him because he knows that Allen has similar experiences and speaks from them.

Allen doesn't think that Deuce is stupid in the slightest and views him as genuinely smart. To Allen, intelligence isn't determined by grades or academic abilities, but by morals, attitude, logic, and willingness — all of which Deuce has.

Allen doesn't try to change Deuce. Rather than turning Deuce into a full-on honor student and role model, which he isn't by nature, Allen prefers for Deuce to stay true to himself and work towards his goal while not suppressing any aspect of who he is — Allen knows exactly that forcefully becoming someone you naturally aren't would cause more issues than it would fix. In order to assist Deuce with staying true to himself while working towards his desired self, Allen does several things:

Allen lets Deuce be his 100% authentic self when they're together. Deuce tries extremely hard to always be polite and serious in order to maintain his reputation and not resort to old habits, but Allen, being very impulsive and easily angered himself, knows just too well that suppressing one's feelings and true nature isn't the way to go. When they're together, Deuce can openly rant about topics, use insults towards the people who angered him, and show his emotions without having to worry about how others perceive him or about how it might mess up his reputation — Allen would never judge Deuce nor share his secrets with others. This way, Deuce can be himself without restraints while also maintaining the way he wants others to perceive him.

Allen allows Deuce to be a delinquent in a safe, harmless way. If Deuce ever feels like doing something forbidden without breaking rules or staining his reputation, Allen (a very lowkey delinquent) has just the ideas for him. This provides a comfortable space for Deuce to live out his tendencies without falling back into bad habits.

Allen is able to introduce Deuce to a wide range of healthy coping mechanisms that work for him. Allen is a much angrier person than Deuce and is equally impulsive, but has stellar self-control due to the methods he uses, and passes them down to Deuce. As a result, Deuce doesn't feel the need to immediately lash out at others anymore and manages to become calmer and much more mature, taking steps into his desired direction.

Allen helps Deuce channel his "negative traits" into positive/helpful ones. With Allen's assistance, methods, reassuring words and unique view on things, Deuce learns how to use the qualities that he used to hate about himself to his advantage. Suddenly Deuce's anger is no longer a hindrance, but a source of energy and motivation.

Allen admires the things Deuce hates about himself. While Deuce wishes he wasn't as hot-headed, Allen views it as an amazing trait and sees the passion and longing for justice behind Deuce's fiery attitude. Additionally, Allen is able to help Deuce see the positive side of these traits, and aids him in channelling them into something good to use to his advantage (see above).

Allen is the only person to fully get through to Deuce. Due to them essentially having the same experiences, opinions, wishes and morals, Deuce felt comfortable trusting Allen with every last bit of his heart (in comparison to other friends) — not to mention that the way Allen was able to help Deuce so intensely and actually talked to him the way he needed it also played a role! Allen has his way with words and knew exactly how to talk to Deuce from the beginning.

Deuce can genuinely open up about his self-esteem to Allen. It's been heavily hinted at in the game several times that Deuce thinks incredibly lowly of himself, but this topic is usually cut short and he doesn't talk about it further with the canon Yuu. With Allen, however, Deuce can open up all he wants to. He knows that Allen has similar experiences and struggles with self-worth related issues himself, therefore not only not judging Deuce, but also fully understanding him.

Allen perfectly understands Deuce's past. Having been feared, avoided and known to be a delinquent/bad kid himself, Allen even understands the details extremely well. Neither of the two ever had a proper friend until they met each other on their first day at NRC.

Allen successfully helps Deuce with his studies despite hating school. Seeing how Deuce needs help, Allen (the "gifted kid") gladly volunteers, even though he's no longer interested in class and has sworn to drop the "honor student" facade himself. Due to Allen's easy explanations, methods, photographic memory and capability to catch on quickly, Deuce actually manages to improve his test results by 1-2 grades.

Allen's study methods are unique, which helps Deuce & is necessary for him. Being a slow learner (I also hc him to have some sort of intellectual disability), Deuce requires rather unique approaches to topics. As Allen is well-versed with both studying and psychology and also keeps Deuce's exact issues in mind, he's able to perfectly tailor methods and mnemonic bridges that actually work out for Deuce.

Allen makes sure that Deuce's desire to be a model student is & stays healthy. A fair part of Allen's trauma stems from being an honor student himself and having unrealistically high expectations regarding grades and attitude shoved down his throat by everyone at school (including himself), so he pays a lot of attention that the same doesn't happen to Deuce.

Allen respects Deuce a ton. Not only is Deuce determined, passionate, loyal, honest and eager, but he has the same core values as Allen, too. In Allen's opinion, finding someone with these traits is not only rare, but immediately makes them endearing to him.

Allen is patient with Deuce. He understands that Deuce occasionally has a difficult time processing and understanding things, and he isn't bothered by it in the slightest. This means even more when you consider that Allen is generally a very impatient person and is only able to be patient with those he truly loves and trusts.

Allen fills Deuce in when he doesn't understand something. Due to Allen being able to catch on extremely quickly, he can immediately explain things and situations to Deuce, helping him out and allowing him to get everything right from the beginning.

Allen indirectly protects Deuce. Known for being intimidating (in a good way), quick-witted, sly and a skilled schemer, most people — including those who enjoy picking on Deuce — shy away from Allen and avoid getting in trouble with his friends.

Allen stops Deuce from getting into fights. Whenever Deuce is about to get into a fight anyway, Allen gently but sternly reminds him of both his goal and the healthier coping mechanisms.

Allen understands that Deuce dislikes being picked on. Allen, being a sensitive person, hates it himself, and he actively tells off everyone who dares to make fun of Deuce or call him "Loosey Deucey". At times, Allen even gets snappy because of the inappropriate nicknames or insults directed at Deuce.

Allen inspires Deuce. Him being skilled at a variety of things and just logical in general gives Deuce the motivation to achieve the same. Deuce doesn't compare himself to Allen, either, and views him as an inspiration. If Allen can control himself and get positive things out of his negative traits, so can Deuce, right?! Not to mention that Allen is extremely tough and pulls through no matter what despite his mental and physical state...

Allen's maturity subconsciously wears off on Deuce. Even outside of the fact that Allen helps him grow and improve a lot through all the ways mentioned before, Deuce sometimes also subconsciously copies his boyfriend's mature attitude or asks himself what Allen would do in certain situations.

Allen is an advisor to Deuce. Deuce struggles with planning ahead, and Allen — a big-time overthinker who's extremely competent at scheming — is able to assist him. As a result, Deuce makes less bad decisions.

Allen loves blastcycles. Deuce can rant about them to Allen for hours, and the two often go on blastcycle dates together. Nothing is more fun than clinging onto your partner while driving at full speed!

Allen values Deuce's company like no other. Deuce regularly feels like a nobody, and Allen takes that feeling from him due to how much he connects with him and likes having him around.

BONUS: Allen is not only beautiful but also has an incredibly strong personality, drive, and determination and hasn't given up despite everything that happened to him. Deuce is a massive simp and his humongous crush on Allen has always been obvious due to how Deuce just can't shut up about him.

Allen:

Deuce loves and accepts Allen's body. As we have seen through his interactions with Azul and Epel, Deuce is very protective of people who don't fit the norm, and Allen is another such person — an intersex boy who was bullied for his unconventional body. Deuce has not only sworn to protect Allen from any possible discrimination, but also loves his body dearly and thinks he's super hot.

Deuce gives Allen a sense of stability. Allen's life was all about short-lived fake joys and prevailing negativity prior to coming to Twisted Wonderland, which made him feel disconnected from many things and people and gave him the feeling that everything is temporary anyway. However, Deuce's fierce loyalty and the strength of their relationship prove Allen wrong — yes, there can indeed be things in life that last forever.

Deuce's utter affection warms Allen's empty heart. Allen was never loved by anyone but his parents, who he thinks only love him because he's their son. Other than that, he never experienced love, affection, ... or even mere friendship. He was alone... until he met Deuce, who he somehow immediately connected with. It was as if their friendship was predestined by the universe... and with every day, Deuce's affection for Allen only grew.

Deuce genuinely admires Allen. Seeing how Allen always does his best, works hard, has ambitions and aims to improve impresses Deuce a ton. This is extremely healing for Allen, whose efforts were never properly recognized or rewarded before and who thinks that he needs to perfect at everything in order to be "someone".

Deuce makes Allen feel useful and resourceful. Allen often believes that he has no worth and could never make a change for the better no matter how much he tries, but seeing just how much he's able to help Deuce with a wide range of things proves Allen wrong — he's indeed capable of a lot of things. Not to mention that Deuce even passes some of Allen's tips down to Epel!

Deuce's honesty is refreshing to Allen. After being lied to and tricked by about anyone Allen ever knew before coming to Twisted Wonderland, Deuce's natural honesty and loyalty are an unfamiliar but utterly wonderful experience for Allen.

Deuce makes Allen feel understood. Allen often believes that others would view him as a monster if they were aware of his secret anger and opinions, but Deuce shares many of them. These two can openly talk about their values together and Allen feels extremely understood because of it — a feeling he barely ever experiences with other people.

Deuce helps Allen enjoy the moment. While he has some overthinking tendencies himself, Deuce is much more spontaneous than Allen and tends to act more on impulse. As a result, he can show his ways to Allen, allowing the overthinker to finally relax and think about his problems a little less.

Deuce doesn't hesitate to stand up for Allen. The fact that Allen was bullied for something he can't change in the past saddens and angers Deuce, and he has sworn to himself that he'll always protect his boyfriend. If there should ever be another situation where Allen gets bullied, Deuce won't hesitate to absolutely throw hands — this is not being a bad person and picking fights, it's standing up for an innocent person whose life was ruined by malice. Deuce wouldn't regret it in the slightest anymore, especially since Allen has helped him learn than anger isn't a bad thing.

Deuce helps Allen with becoming a proper mage. When Allen first gains magic during the final quarter of the school year, he has absolutely no control over it and is partially even avoided due to being a "walking health hazard". Deuce, however, sees this as the perfect time to pay Allen back for helping him study theory and decides to assist Allen with practical things. Through Deuce's determination and belief in him, Allen is able to improve much quicker than he would've without Deuce's help.

BONUS: Deuce is the warmth and honesty that Allen needs in his life. The boy's mere presence lights up Allen's day and Deuce's careful physical affection makes him feel like the most cherished person in the universe.

What else is there to them? (examples)

Both are extremely close with their families.

Due to being so similar and sharing many personality traits, loving each other so deeply allowed them to realize that they can easily love and accept themselves, too.

Deuce's previous incarnation had a crush on Allen's, who died way too early. In this life, the regrets of the past are being fixed.

Allen's the brain, Deuce is the brawn.

They're both extremely cuddly with each other.

LOTS OF COMPLIMENTS (from both sides).

Deuce often gifts Allen plushies.

Allen and Deuce are basically inseparable by now.

If you hang out with Deuce, you have to suffer through at least one tiny ramble about Allen.

...and much more that can be found on @spade-of-storms!

♤♤♤♤♤♤♤♤♤♤

Thank you so much for reading! I hope you like the art & ship and are looking forward to more of them! (✿◕‿◕)

EDIT: Please do not take inspiration from this ship. ;-;

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haykawas · 1 year ago

Text

✩•̩̩͙*˚ THE ART OF (NOT) PULLING YOUR BEST FRIEND

summary : You've always been good at hiding your feelings for your best friend, but when Satoru finally manages to land a date with the girl of his dreams, something seems to shift inside you. But don't worry, you have another best friend there who's more than willing to care for you.

word count : ~ 11K for all routes that are out, ~ 2.8K for this part. tags : best friend!to lovers, modern AU, best friends gojo & geto, fluff, angst, eventual smut, drama, love confessions, multiple choices standalone.

It is known that blue is your favorite color.

Blue like the sea. Like the sky on a particularly hot day. Blue like the feathers of a magnificent peacock, and the flesh of a ripe blueberry.

His eyes are blue. They’re this piercing, icy blue you can’t seem to get away from wherever you are. – It is a coincidence that they are your favorite shade of blue, too.

You don’t know when you started liking the color blue with so much passion, and you think maybe you always have. Yet you don’t do anything about it, you don’t go out of your way to profess your love for it. You don’t seek it out and won’t admit it’s the only color that’ll ever make you feel the way you do when you look at it.

It’s okay. There are many other shades to love. It’s just disheartening that it seems to be the only one that suits you so well.

And it is this same shade of blue that is sparkling in Satoru’s eyes, screaming ‘victory’ as he comes back to your table in a confident stride. The wide grin that is stretching his pink lips is triumphant, and you know what this means.

He actually did it.

He slams the piece of paper on the table, leaning at your level to rub it in your face, his sunglasses threatening to fall off his nose. – He always looks so cute when they do that, his nose slightly scrunching to keep them from doing so.

“Ha! You owe me ten bucks.”

You roll your eyes at him, clicking your tongue in annoyance. “I’m sure she took pity on you. That, or it’s a fake number.”

You hope it is, but you would be a fool to believe that. Just a look at your best friend would be enough to understand the fact that he could get anything he would ever want. Like he loved saying, his face card never declined. – To your dismay.

“Oh I knew you’d say that, so I called the number just in case. And guess what?”

“Ugh, Satoru? That’s fucking insane.” You cringe without waiting for him to finish what he has to say.

His eyes widen comically, pointing at you with accusation. “It’s not!”

Suguru also grimaces, “It is. Creep.”

You grin and silently mouth back the word to your white-haired friend, mocking him.

Satoru rolls his eyes, already exasperated with the both of you, “Whatever you say. While you nerds are gonna be drowning in your video games, I’ll actually be getting some action tonight.” He winks, emphasizing the word action and you feign a gag. And you don’t have to try too hard for it to come out as genuine.

Suguru chimes in, sighing, “Just don’t come crying to us when she ghosts you, man. Again.”

You hum, your chin propped up on your hand, “He sure knows how to pick ‘em, hm, Suguru?”

“She’s different, guys, come on!” He whines.

“Weren’t the three other girls before different too?“

“I believe they were!“ You say, feigning the act of pushing imaginary glasses up your nose. Suguru chuckles, and you grin at him.

“Well, y’know…” He trails off, sighing in defeat because he knows he’s been cornered. “I just really don’t wanna screw this one up.”

You raise an eyebrow, a forced smile on your lips. “We’re just fucking with you, ‘Toru.” You smirk, “But don’t worry, we’ll keep the ice cream ready just in case you come back with your tail between your legs.”

He groans, “I swear you two are perfect for each other. Always teaming up on me like that! What have I done to deserve two mean best friends?”

Suguru looks at you in amusement, and you instantly meet his eyes with a cheeky grin of your own.

“Two pretty best friends.”

At this meaningful exchange, Satoru groans, throwing his hands in the air.

“See? My point exactly!”

You can’t help but let your lips curve into a half-smile at his antics, and you don’t notice how your eyes seem to shine so much brighter when they are laid on your best friend, but Suguru does. He knows you by heart, having spent so many days and so many nights by your side.

At the time, you and Satoru came into a package deal as much as Satoru and him did. Naturally, after spending so many years by your side, he understands the mechanics of your brain. Sometimes, such as now, he even senses something’s wrong before you even do.

Right now, he knows that your heart aches. That it must be clenching painfully in your chest, that you must be punishing yourself for not feeling happy for your best friend when he’s been meaning to ask this girl out for weeks now. But how could you, when the mere thought of him touching and tasting someone else’s skin makes you feel like you can’t breathe? Like always, Suguru can’t help but want to protect you.

So he calls your name, and when you turn to him, he leans in to whisper in your ear, “Hey, you really okay with this?”

You try to muster a grin, though it doesn’t quite reach your eyes, and like always he sees right through you. “Me? Why wouldn’t I be okay? ‘m just worried he’ll get his hopes up for nothing, that’s all.”

He lifts a brow not quite buying your act, but he doesn’t say a thing, and you’re thankful for that.

“What do you say we give him a taste of his own medicine then?”

You arch a brow in confusion, and he waves a hand before explaining himself.

“Remember when you used to date this Nanami guy and Satoru constantly crashed your dates with phone calls and weird texts?”

“And when he actually showed up out of nowhere at the theater and shoved himself between us! I swear I was gonna rip him to shreds.”

“You gave him the silent treatment for a week after that, I thought I was gonna go crazy with his constant blabbering.” He groans, his almond eyes slightly crinkling as he reminisces your high school days.

You scoff, amused, “He always had some lame excuses, too. Nanami ended up breaking up with me 'cause he thought I was cheating on him with that fucker.”

“So what do you think? Up for a little fun?” He says as he looks at you with mirth in his eyes, waiting for you to catch on. When you do, you can’t help but gasp at the implications of his words.

“Are you serious?”

He grins cheekily, “Let’s go to the same place he’s taking his date, but in disguise.”

“That does sound fun…” Suguru looks at you with anticipation. “But it’s very childish.”

“Yep.”

“And he might see us.”

“That’s a possibility.”

“He’ll be pissed, too…”

“Oh, he will.” He smirks and you can’t help but mirror his expression.

“I’m in.”

“Hey! What are you two whispering about?”

“Hm? Just girl talk, you wouldn’t get it.” You answer, and you hear Suguru snicker in the back. You also can’t help the cheeky grin forming on your lips when you notice Satoru’s expression, but you don’t give him time to argue. “Hey, where did you say your date was, again?”

That’s how you find yourself standing before the restaurant. You can’t help but scoff at the sight.

“Papa’s, seriously? It’s like he’s begging to get dumped!”

Your eyes shift to Suguru, and you burst out laughing at the sight. “You look absolutely ridiculous.” You say with a grin, and he mirrors your expression with a raised brow.

“Oh, and you don’t?”

Your eyes meet and you try to hold it in, – you’re smiling so wide it hurts your cheeks. Suguru turns his neck and averts his eyes so he doesn’t laugh, but you can see the grin stretching his lips.

“The mustache is killing me, man, I’m gonna blow our cover!” You laugh, “Take it off.”

“And ruin the vibe I went for?” He shakes his head, “Just say you want to sabotage me.”

“I do! You look way too hot in this, our cover will be blown immediately!” You tease.

He arches a brow, a hint of amusement gleaming in his eyes, “Do I now?”

“Uh uh,” You nod, “I’m this close to calling off the operation just so I can rock your world.” He lets out a deep laugh, hiding his mouth with the back of his hand as his eyes crinkle in amusement.

You return his smile.

What should have been a depressing evening turned into one of the funniest nights of your life. You would try your best to keep yourself from laughing while Suguru would act all serious, without a hint of a smile. He plays his part so well that he makes it even harder for you to keep up your facade. Your laughter echoes through the streets as you try hard not to attract attention, failing spectacularly when you happen to catch a glimpse of Suguru’s costume, – especially his top hat.

He has to be the only person in the world who’d think of dressing up as freaking Abraham Lincoln to spy on someone.

After this night, the bond between you two grows even stronger. Late-night conversations become the norm, and you’ve grown used to hanging out without Satoru.

It’s also due to the fact that Satoru would always find himself too busy to spend time with you, for some reason. He also misses on movie nights, and Satoru usually never misses movie nights.

You suspect it has to be because he’s seeing that girl from the Café.

You don’t want to think about it. Nor do you want to think about the distance that is growing between you. Yet you can’t deny that you miss him.

You miss him terribly, because he’s always been the only constant in your life and now it seems like he isn’t anymore. You’ve always shared everything with him, and him with you, so having him act so cold towards you feels strange. It feels like a knife in your heart.

You exhale, your finger hovering over the send button as you contemplate whether to send the message. Even if you don’t think you’ve done anything wrong, you refuse to let miscommunication come between the two of you.

you SATORU . you still coming tonight???:p

No. Too casual.

you wyd tonight? still on 4 movie night?;)

Ugh, too horny.

you Are you coming tonight or are you still avoiding us?

Hell no. Too truthful.

you you coming tonight?

Sent. As soon as you hit the send button, you throw your phone on the couch and bury it under a mountain of pillows. You sigh, feeling slightly stupid for freaking out over such a simple text.

But you never fight with Satoru, this is something you just don't do.

You’re so lost in your own embarrassment that you don’t see the screen of your phone light up, displaying Satoru’s contact name in bold letters.

satoru yeah i'll be there

The scent of sugar fills the kitchen, and you’re lost in thought as you watch the bag of dried corn turn into sweet treats under the microwave’s heat. You sigh for what feels like the hundredth time tonight, and Suguru groans at the sound.

“My mom used to say sighs brought out the devil.” He lifts a brow. “At this rate I’ll have to incense the whole house when you leave.”

“Your mom’s way too superstitious, and you know that.” You roll your eyes. “But if the devil’s real I hope he takes you first. You’re a pain in my ass.”

He hums with a small smile, “Seems like you’re in a mood to me.”

“Classy. And a bit sexist.”

“You know what else’s classy? Not burning up the only bag of popcorn we have.” He throws with a smirk as he leaves the kitchen.

You curse at him under your breath and make quick work to retrieve what can be saved. When you’re done, you meet him on the sofa, and find him already sprawled out.

He scoots over to make room for you, and you let yourself fall on the cushions, propping your legs on his thighs. You place the bowl between the two of you, and there’s silence before you hear Suguru snort.

“I tried, okay? It was all burnt!”

“You’re so not talented at this.” He bites his lip to avoid laughing, while his gaze keeps flickering from the bowl to your eyes.

“Stop looking at it!” You move the bowl out of his sight, “You won’t have any if you keep making fun of me.” You threaten, and Suguru retreats, his hands raised in mock surrender.

“Alright, alright! Give it back and sit down, the movie’s starting.”

“I wish someone loved me like this.”

You don’t realize you’ve said this out loud until you feel Suguru’s burning gaze on you. You don’t know if it’s because you’ve suddenly blurted out a lame, depressing confession, or because he thinks you’re crazy for saying it when you’re watching Shrek.

“I’m sure there is.”

You scoff, “Yeah, right.”

You turn your gaze back to the TV, but you can’t ignore the look he’s giving you. You try to ignore it, but he doesn’t let it go. And you know he has something to say. Something you won’t like.

“What?” You finally blurt out, appraising him with narrowed eyes.

“When are you going to tell him?”

“Tell who?”

“Don’t play dumb.” He gives you a blank stare, unimpressed by your act. “Everyone and their mother knows you have it bad for Satoru.”

“Suguru…” You groan.

“Go on, tell me I’m wrong.”

Your mouth opens to try and muster up a lie, but you can’t come up with anything. You can’t lie about this, and he knows it.

He smiles, “See? You can’t even deny it.”

“He has a girlfriend.”

“Oh, did he tell you? Or did you just pull this one out of your ass?”

You roll your eyes, pushing him away. He chuckles, enjoying the sheer embarrassment displayed on your face.

“You know he didn’t. But come on! You and I both know he never misses movie night, and he’s been bailing on us for weeks now.” You frown, “What kind of best friend does that?”

Suguru hums. “Yeah, sure. A best friend.”

You look at him with arched brows. He’s testing your limits, and while you’re used to this side of him, you’re not in the mood to play. At this point, you’ve both drowned out the sound of the TV, you glaring at him for forcing you to face the truth, and him just waiting for you to come to terms with your own feelings.

You let out a humorless laugh, throwing your hands in the air, “You know what?”

“Yes, I’m in love with Satoru! So what? Do you expect me to run to his house and confess my undying love for him before it’s ‘too late’?” You exclaim, and you’re too engrossed in your speech to notice Suguru’s panicked expression as he looks over your shoulder, or his hand gestures signaling you to cut the conversation short.

You don’t realise you’re no longer alone until the sound of movement startles you. You turn around with a jump, and what you see makes your blood run cold. Satoru is standing in the doorway, his presence having gone unnoticed until then. You can see the shock on his face, a mixture of surprise and confusion.

You’re paralyzed.

You feel like the sick butt of a joke. And if the fact that your childhood best friend heard you profess your love for him wasn't enough to make you wish you were dead, it’s the look on his face that crushes you the most.

His eyes search for yours in hope you’ll explain yourself, and it makes you want to disappear from the surface of the Earth.

You never wanted him to know. You never wanted him to look at you like this. Like… he pitied you.

Suguru extends an arm to hold you back, but he’s a few seconds too late. You can’t bear this, so much that you don’t let anyone say a single word before you flee the apartment, ducking under Satoru’s arm without sparing him a glance.

You absolutely won’t stand there and listen to him apologize for not feeling the same way you do.

You refuse to feel your best friends’ sorry glances on you as they comfort you. You know it’s cowardly, that you should just stayed and talked about the elephant in the room, or just lied your way out of it.

You didn't, though. You fled, and the shame is eating you alive, but you couldn't stay there.

Not today. Your dignity won’t let you.

Yet, it seems like fate has other plans for you, because you hear quick, familiar, footsteps hurrying towards you.

And you know it’s him.

Him? What do you mean by him? Help a poor writer out!

Suguru Geto, who else?

Of course it's Gojo Satoru.

hello hello, welcome to my standalone first choose your own adventure!! there are three routes to this story (one has two possible branches), two are already out, one is coming soon! i absolutely loved working on this, although this took lots of time. i hope you enjoy it!

rbs are much appreciated <3

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pupyuj · 6 months ago

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[cw: g!p liz, pregnancy, breeding kink, lactation kink]

i wasn’t meant to write anything for this bcs i was literally just sitting eating breakfast this morning when the thought of baby daddy jiwon graced my brain and i laughed at it for a second but then it got serious so now ya’ll have to indulge me bcs??? 🤤🤤 also not me saying that that one baby daddy yuj was the only time i’ll write abt pregnancy and yet here we are…

kinda long bcs i rlly loved the fluffy stuff so hehe have fun 💖

we’re all thinking about the same thing, right? your chaotic mess of a girlfriend jiwon feeling as if her whole world was turned upside down when you sit her down and give her the news in the morning where the two of you were supposed to go on a cute picnic date 😭 you can’t tell me she wouldn’t sit there for at least half an hour taking everything in, merely just staring at the wall with her mouth hanging open for so long you thought it would get stuck that way 😭😭 and ykw you were worried for a bit!! the two of you certainly didn’t plan on this happening and this was the clear result of both of you forgetting to use protection that one night where you were just eager to feel the other’s skin,, you half expected jiwon to be angry and lash out at you but no! ofc weird ass jiwon takes a deep breath before pulling you up to your feet and hugging you 🥺

she figured that the news was even harder on you since you were the one carrying the kid,, and being the amazing girlfriend she was, she prioritized your feelings over her own,, comforting you, whispering sweet nothings in your ear when you broke down in her arms not bcs you were upset abt being pregnant or anything but bcs you were just relieved that jiwon wasn’t going to abandon you 🥺🥺 and you’d still go on that picnic date with her! it would be awkward at first but best believe she’s promising to be there for you and with you every step of the way whether or not you decide to keep the baby 🥹💞

i believe in the ‘jiwon would be a wonderful soon-to-be-daddy’ agenda! due to her genuine fear of fucking shit up, she’d probably read countless parenting books 😭😭 sure she knew how to take care of a little kid or two but not a baby! let alone one that she made! she’s reading books, getting ahead of the game and researching and possibly buying all the stuff your kid needs, asking her parents for advice… jiwonie just wants to be the perfect partner and parent 🥺💕 you’d find her in the kitchen one day practicing how to make milk—as in making sure it’s the correct temperature and that it tastes good.. don’t ask her how many times she has actually finished a whole tiny bottle of baby milk 😭😭

and now to the nasty parts! ☺️ if i remember correctly i said this same thing about baby daddy yuj (🤤… sorry—) but jiwonie would sometimes find herself staring at you and thinking back to the night she got you knocked up! it would be worse with her though—unlike yujin’s massive ego showoff, she’s more… dreamy about it? 😭 like she’s really basking in every detail of that night from the stumbling-into-your-bedroom shit while giggling, practically ripping each other’s clothes off while making out, jiwon surprising you with her hidden strength when she suddenly just pushes you into the bed and quite literally gives you the best fucking of your life?? all that of that along with seeing that growing bump in your stomach and your now swollen tits heavy with milk, well… nobody can blame jiwon from getting hard on the spot!

also becomes a clingy perv 🤤🤤 obsessed with backhugging you randomly and kissing your neck bcs it makes you giggle bcs ur ticklish and she loves hearing you laugh BUT ALSO you whimper and get goosebumps all over your skin so it just… turns her on so much 🫣 loves caressing your little baby bump while she half listens to you yap about your day and half touches you all over 😳 you don’t notice what she’s doing until one of her hands is squeezing your inner thigh and the other is making its way up to your breasts,, “our kid’s very lucky.. they have the prettiest mom in the whole world.” and she’s leaving marks all over your neck and shoulder while she feels up your soaked panties… 🫣🫣

jiwon’s a love-maker so expect to be gently fucked while standing by the sink! has definitely memorized each and every spot that has you scratching her arms and curling your toes so you were just completely at her mercy the entire time! the contrast of jiwon telling you the sweetest and prettiest things in your ear while she softly fucks you into an orgasm that has you seeing white?? see, she’s all hot and sexy while fucking you but then you turn around after getting situated and you see a wet spot in the middle of her pants.. even she would laugh and cover up her red face 😭 but she can’t help it okay?! it’s totally normal for someone to cum while fucking their partner.. jiwon just happened to be so stinking cute while doing so that you can’t help but take her to bed afterwards 🤭

now as we’ve established before, jiwon’s always taking care of you and that pretty much tripled every time you wanted to do something ‘drastic’ in terms of sex!☝️ jiwon is always careful when in bed with you, only choosing positions that were safe and comfortable for you even if they weren’t for her! even if you have her rolling her eyes to the back of her head while you ride her, jiwon’s still looking out for you! whether it may be asking if you’re okay, if anything hurts, or just singing your praises to ease you 🥺🥺

jiwon’s so weak against dirty talk too?? 😭 especially when you tell her you want to make a big family with her bcs she knows that means you want her to get you pregnant over and over and yk what that does to her brain?? it almost literally shuts it down bcs she gets sooo turned on at the idea 😵‍💫 sometimes she even thinks about it when she’s cleaning up the house or at work and has to run to the bathroom bcs her fucking cock just wants to burst out of her pants 😭 baby can’t control it, she always needs you :((

ah yeah and the moment your tits start leaking?? it’s so over bcs you’d think that jiwon wouldn’t get even more obsessed with you than she already is but you’re so wrong‼️‼️ teases you and calls you ‘mommy’ a lot while licking and sucking away at your breasts.. and eye contact is a must bcs she loves the flush on your cheeks as you watched her lap all of your milk up! 🫣 and she definitely makes a joke abt being the one to drink your breastmilk if your kid ever gets tired of it but the two of you know damn well it’s not just a joke 🤭 jiwon also loves massaging your breasts to ease the tension in your shoulders and god her dick just gets so fucking hard when she feels her hands get wet w your milk 😵‍💫

in all of your years dating jiwon you never could have guessed that there was a gentlewoman in her! definitely the perfect balance of being a good mommy and a very charming daddy 🥺🥺 speaking of which, her knees turn into jelly whenever you ‘jokingly’ call her ‘daddy’ in and out of bed 🫣 she’s the cutest baby daddy ever 💕

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bomber-grl · 1 year ago

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SAL FISHER RELATIONSHIP HC ! ₊˚⊹

₊˚⊹ PAIRING(s): Sal fisher x Gn!reader

He’s so sweet it hurts

Honestly, Sal is the best boyfriend ever, he’s always there for you and he always knows the perfect things to say when comforting you.

The two of you met because of the ghosts and the whole cult thing while at high school.

You were the more outspoken one out of the two of you since Sal was mostly against violence even when Travis was brought into the convo.

I can definitely see Sal being the first one to approach you.

It all started when Sal started becoming increasingly interested in you to the point that Larry and even ash started teasing and encouraging him to talk to you.

He would fluster, occasionally and say the wrong words out of nervousness however with luck, he managed to get your number.

It was hard not to fall for him, especially with how lovable he is.

He’s so genuinely nice and actually cares for others.

Of course, you eventually see his face, and although he was neutral about it since he trusted you he was still a bit nervous.

Definitely warms his heart when you not only accept his face but also kiss it.

He flusters and stutters so badly afterwards.

Continuing from that, he’s definitely the type to tease lightheartedly

Definitely not in the beginning though

So when you first started teasing and provoking him, causing him to get super flustered

He wouldn’t really know what to do except accept it, so imagine your surprise when he turns the tables once day and makes you a blushing mess

Most times when you hang out, you usually hang at the apartments in his room, or when sals an adult you’d hang out in his room in the house

During these hang outs you guys would usually listen to some music or just enjoy each others presence

Most times it’s just you and sal cuddling and ngl he smells rlly good

Like I’m not even joking and when you mention this, he can’t help but laugh and just tells you do too

However, when you guys hang out with Larry (which is more often than not) you guys end up in more than sus situations 😭😭

Then Larry is all like “I’ll leave you guys at it” and dips

Like??? We’re not doing anything 😭🗣️

Anyway

While you’re at high school ofc Travis has something to say, and if you’re a guy then he obviously calls you the f slur and a lot of homophobic nonsense

And if you’re a girl Travis still calls y’all homos in a negative way, and always says shit about you two

And I don’t think I need elaborate further about how Travis would probably hate crime you if you were non-binary, gender fluid, or basically anything under the trans umbrella

(Basically any gender identity that isn’t your assigned one 😭

Larry, ash, and Todd all get pissed at Travis , and they always come to the both of your guy’s defense

And ofc Sal is bit lenient towards Travis, well only ever when Travis is talking shit about him

If Travis talks shit about you he’d be pissed

But ofc younger Sal is less violent and more open so he’d obvs be kinder

Anyway, we all know what happens at the apartments and if you live there-

Let’s just say it pains Sal so much to have to kill you

I mean him having to kill all the people he grew up with and the people he cares for is horrible but he knows he has to

However, if you don’t, well let’s say you know about the cult and why he did it

Still doesn’t stop you from trying to find a way to get a lower sentence and from trying the convince ash of the truth

When sal dies, let’s just say you feel so alone

Of course you have ash by your side but it’s just horrible

Eventually you’re the person that sals soul would enter and you’d defeat the cult that way

But let’s all pretend that they were able to defeat the cult without having to kill the innocent tenants

Making sal a free man

Well if it were that way, you and Sal would be together for a long time, and if you both wished it, married too

———

Art credits : @/toasterdoodle22

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ddejavvu · 5 days ago

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Spring Fling - Jake 'Hangman' Seresin x Reader (Part Five) (18+) / Part One | Part Two | Part Three | Part Four

Summary: You should have known the ‘no refunds’ detail on the website for Spring Fling was a red flag. But you paid no mind to it, eager to be assigned a quick fuck for spring break. When the man that walks through your cabin door is none other than Jake 'Hangman' Seresin, your wildly infuriating fellow pilot, you have two choices: bicker the entire time and have a miserable spring break, or fuck.

Contents/Warnings: smut, minors dni. fem!reader, pilot!reader, enemies/rivals to lovers, lots and lots of arguing, could these two people be any less cooperative, sex seven ways to sunday and then some, seriously like so much smut it'll make your eyes bleed, makeouts, rough sex, oral (m+f receiving), penetrative sex, will add as i post

WC: 7.0k / navigation / inbox

A/N: Thank you all for waiting for this chapter! I know it took me longer to finish this one than it did the others but it's the longest chapter so far, and I also had a lot of major life events go down in the time between this chapter and last. I appreciate each and every single one of you who stayed patient with me, and I hope that this chapter and that the rest to come are worth the wait :) <3

feedback is greatly appreciated! comment, reblog, talk in the tags, send me a message, tell me what you think!

You’re doing a terrible job at paying attention to where you’re going as you take the elevator, jamming your finger against the 12 button so hard it hurts. Pizza is on the twelfth floor, and you’re hoping Daniel will be there early like you so that you can forget about Jake and his tyrannical rule.

It’s clear as day to you; Jake thinks he has control over you just the same way he has control over the girls that drool over him at the Hard Deck. He thinks one glance will melt your brain into mush, but it won’t. It doesn’t, and you’re not letting the cockiest man you know believe he’s won you over. Especially one that you work with. If anyone found out- if any of your fellow aviators knew that you’d succumbed to Jake’s charms… you’d risk losing the respect you’ve fought hard to earn on the tarmac. You’re not letting your career take a nosedive because Jake won’t stop bragging about getting his dick wet. He doesn’t get a say in your life if he has nothing genuine to contribute to it. You know him well enough to know that caving in and fucking would be the worst decision of your life, and you refuse to let him feel like he’s won you like a prize. You’re standing up for yourself; if he can shit-talk Daniel, you can shit-talk Miss Melons.

Your skin prickles with annoyance the more you think about the woman that had approached you both- seriously, did she not consider that she was being intrusive and rude? You assume Jake has snagged her away from her roommate by now, and they’re probably having a better time than you are.

Everything feels unfair, down to the coincidental roommate placement. It’s like the universe had heard you needed a break, and wanted to punish you for it.

Cracking open your book helps, but it takes you a while to get into the groove. You’re sitting poolside across from the pizza place, eyes glancing from page to parlor every once in a while to check for a certain bearded man. The main lead is compelling, and your stomach soars as you imagine Daniel in a cowboy hat. You’d save that horse.

Peace is hard to find while sitting poolside on a cruise, but chaos is actually the perfect white noise for you to read, and your concentration isn’t broken until a shadow falls over your lounge chair. You glance up, but it’s not the man you’d wanted to see.

“Hey.” Jake’s already frowning, his face apprehensive like he thinks you’ll scream at him to get away. You want to, but you don’t want to cause a scene.

“What, Hangman?”

“I’m not trying to control you.” He pushes despite seeing your gaze back on your book, “I just don’t think you’re meant to be with Daniel. But I shouldn’t have given you a hassle for doing the same thing to me. I just… I do it because-”

He stops short, glancing sideways at a man running despite the clear no running sign on the lifeguard tower. You decide to help him in his moment of need.

“Because you’re used to women who let you walk all over them. Even if you’re not trying to control me, you’re used to having that control. It’s familiar for you, so you expect it, even if you don’t know you’re doing it. But I’m not like that. You can’t keep me waiting on you.”

The scoff he lets out is accompanied by an expression that looks truly pained, “That ain’t it at all. But forget it. Don’t worry about why I do it. I just thought maybe you were doin’ it to me for the same reasons. But never mind. I’ll shut up about Daniel. Truce?”

You glare up at him, book still open in your lap. He extends an uncharacteristically helping hand, and you wait a truly uncomfortable amount of time before taking it and shaking once.

“Truce.”

He takes the chair beside you, stretched out in the sun. Unfortunately, it seems like your reading time is over as his head turns to you, “So, Dudley showed up yet?”

“He’s coming for lunch.” You cling to your novel, trying desperately to ignore Jake and his instantly broken promise, “What about Melon girl, they weren’t ripe enough for you?”

“She wasn’t my type.” He starts, and there’s a heavy silence before he continues, “I don’t like a woman who thinks it’s fun to get between a couple.”

The sideways glance you send Hangman, the ‘I-told-you-so’ smirk, is lethal.

“Anyways.” He continues, tone more casual now, “Fancy a swim, darlin’?”

“I’ll read instead,” You offer, “But you have fun, Hangman.”

“Party Pooper,” He accuses, standing from the lounge chair he’s occupying and stretching briefly, “You’re an absolute mood-killer. No fun, the most boring person on this boat.”

“I’m about to be more of one: have you put sunscreen on?”

“Nope,” He grins, “You volunteering to do the honors, you sleazy thing?”

“Absolutely not. But you can use the stuff in my bag.” You nod at your tote bag, “Don’t use it all, though.”

“Yes, ma’am.” Jake nods, folding into a seat on the edge of the lounge chair beside yours, “So, what’s going on in that book, they boning yet?”

“Mhm.” You nod absently as Jake begins smearing sunscreen over his arms and legs, “Real sexy stuff.”

“I’ve got somethin’ sexier for you.”

“It’s a porn book, Hangman,” You clarify, in case he’s forgotten, “I’m trying to read porn. Leave me alone.”

“There’s porn right here!” He calls, arms out to show off his impressively tanned and toned chest, a thick layer of sunscreen giving it a sheen that glistens in the light. As reluctant as you are to admire anything about Jake, you can’t lie; he has a body worth ogling. But you will not ogle it.

“This porn’s better,” You hum, glancing up at Jake through your lashes, deceptively inviting, “This guy’s got a cowboy hat on.”

“I’ve got a million and one cowboy hats,” Jake insists, slowly inching towards you and away from the edge of the pool, “Is that really all it takes, darlin’? ‘Cause I can slap one on in seconds, if that’s what you’re after. ‘Even brought one with me in case my roommate was into it.”

“Mm, maybe,” You let him get closer, excitement clearly swirling in his eyes as he advances towards your chair. He doesn’t notice the shifting of your feet until it’s too late and one is shoving firmly against his chest, knocking him off balance and sending him tumbling backwards into the pool.

There’s not anyone in his immediate vicinity besides you, so you take the brunt of the splash, but it’s worth it.

“But I like it better when the hat’s on a real gentleman!” You call, laughter interrupting your words as Jake emerges from the pool well and truly soaked, shaking water out of his hair. He’s been thoroughly underwater trained, so he’d been able to catch his breath in time despite the surprise of it all, and there’s no real harm done besides the initial splash.

“You dirty rotten minx,” He calls, water dripping from his short hair into his eyes, “You lured me in with the promise of cowboy hat sex just to push me in the pool?”

“I can’t believe you fell for it!” You’re still laughing, but maybe this bout of giggles is only to annoy him, “That’s, like, the oldest trick in the book. Well, maybe besides the cowboy hat sex thing. But you shouldn’t have gotten so close!”

He braces his elbows on the wall of the pool, the border surely burning his skin. But he stares at you regardless, “I thought you were finally givin’ in.”

“It’d take a lot more than a cowboy hat to make me give in, Jake.” You laugh, turning back to your book, “Like, a full personality transplant.”

Jake hears Danica’s words repeated back to him in his head, ‘Show, don’t tell’.

“Noted. I’ll look into one’uh those,” He quips, smile sarcastic and empty as he resorts to swimming alone, “Hey, when you’re done with that chapter, you should join me.”

“No.”

“Alright.”

You glance away from the book’s pages at Hangman’s unusual, immediate acceptance of your refusal. But he lifts himself out of the water- no stairs, no ladder, only his forearms against the deck, and your stomach sinks as you realize he might be playing a game of wills with you.

Instead, he sits beside you again, this time facing away from you, “Will you rub some sunscreen on my back?”

You want to say no. You would, if he were only asking to feel your hands on him. And maybe that’s part of it, but you also know that as much as he tans, he could burn, and his back is the only part of himself that he can’t reach. You’d want someone to do you the solid too, so you sigh and set your book aside.

“Fine. But you owe me.”

“Mhm.” He nods, passing you the sunscreen, “I’ll rub it wherever you want, Y/N.”

You whack him upside the head with the bottle, and when he hisses in pain and pitches forwards, you squirt some of the lotion onto your palm and begin applying it to the broad, tanned, muscled expanse of his back.

You’re no masseuse, but apparently you’re rubbing all the right places, because Jake lets out grunts and groans that are borderline pornographic. If they were coming from anyone else, you might have squirmed in your seat, but each one sends your eyes rolling skywards as you cover Jake’s skin in goopy sun lotion.

“Damn, you’re good.” Jake grunts as you dig into a knot beneath his shoulder blade, “Do that again?”

“I’m putting sunscreen on you, Jake, not working out muscle tension.”

“Oh, come on, just a little more?” He pleads, turning so that he can glance at you from the side of his gaze, eyes shining in prayer.

You dig extra hard into his muscle, and you take some sort of wicked pleasure in the way that his resulting groan is more of a pained yelp than something of enjoyment.

“There, Hangman.” You whack the middle of his back, between his shoulder blades, “You’re all oiled up.”

“Aren’t you glad you were the one to get to do it?” Jake grins blindingly, and you bury your nose in your book again to avoid answering his question.

“Oh, you can stick your face in that book all you want,” Jake drawls, and you hear the displacement of the water he steps in as he lowers himself into the pool, gracefully and by choice this time, “But I know you liked having your hands all over me, darlin’.”

You want to gripe something back- something witty and cutting that will tear him down where he stands, but he’s turned away from you, already submerging himself to begin swimming laps. You admire his dedication to exercise even while on vacation- you have no plans to visit the gym in the lower decks.

Jake sees the diving board just as you do, and you keep him in your peripheral vision as he climbs out of the pool to make his way up the ladder. Your novel is begging to be read, but your eyes stick firm on one fitting word- ‘abdomen’ so that you can watch Jake from the corner of your eye as he prepares to dive.

Fortunately, you don’t need to continue the ruse of reading because Jake bellows from across the deck, “Y/N, look!”

You’re met with a grin when you look up at him, his arms raised above his head and joined flush together in diving position, “I’m gonna dive- watch me.”

“I’m watching.” You call, injecting your voice with as much disinterest as you can manage without feeling guilty, “This feels like babysitting, Hangman.”

He dives instead of quipping back, and it’s an impressive one, not that you’ll sing his praises for it. He comes up on the side of the pool closest to you, arms flinging an arc of water onto the concrete before you.

“Was it good?” He asks, panting slightly, hanging onto the wall.

“Yes,” You reply, a sickly sweet smile on your face as you condescend to him, “You did so good, honey.”

“Shut up,” He sends a wave of water splashing over your sandals, and you can’t be mad at him after all the teasing you’ve been inflicting upon him.

“I’ve been workin’ on my diving,” He goes back to swimming around, this time more casual as he keeps his head above the water to speak with you, “My nieces back home are learnin’ to swim so I’ve been in the pool a lot lately. Anytime they drag me in there I dive in and splash them.”

His arms cut through the water with strength and ease, confident strokes as you mull over his words. The image of Jake urging a toddler in floaties to cross a 3-foot gap into his arms is- endearing, not that you’ll admit it. You hum in acknowledgement, and tuck back into your book.

There’s not many people in the pool this early- most are probably still in bed with a hangover and a mess to clean up - and it’s large to boot, so there’s plenty of room. Your eyes drift left and catch sight of a jacuzzi, and suddenly your beach chair seems to pale in comparison.

Okay, you won’t join Jake in the pool, but you’ll relax for a couple of minutes in the jacuzzi. Just until Daniel gets here.

Jake doesn’t notice that you’ve stood until your chair is empty, and you have a perfect view of him floundering, scanning the entire deck until he spots you half-submerged in the hot tub.

You get to laugh at him again, and he grants you a good-natured grin instead of getting annoyed.

“I thought you’d finally found what’s-his-name,” Jake swims over to the separation wall that keeps the hot water parted from the cold, “Mind if I join you, Y/N?”

“Only if you’re- careful!” You shriek, trying desperately to protect the pages of your book from his sopping wet skin as he scales the barrier, “Hangman, if this book gets wet, you’re replacing it for me.”

“Alright, alright! I’ll take you on a shopping spree, relax. Hey, if I’m buyin’ you porn books, doesn’t that make me somethin’ like a sugar daddy?”

“You’re not getting any sugar,” You shrug, “But sure.”

“Just call me daddy, Y/N.” He grins, “That’s all the sugar I need.”

You hide behind your book so that he can’t see the way your face wrinkles into a grimace. The heat from the jacuzzi spreads inexplicably quick all of a sudden, warming your neck, your ears, your face, and Jake lets out a thick, heavy groan as he settles into the warm water.

“This is nice.” He muses, eyes closed, “Real relaxing.”

“It’s less relaxing when someone’s talking the whole time,” You peek across the side of your book, “Shut up, maybe?”

Jake snorts, leaning his head back against the edge of the pool, “Alright, alright your majesty. I’ll stay silent.”

You don’t verbally thank him, but you don’t make a scene when his leg drifts across the jet currents of the jacuzzi to brush against yours.

You cover a good chunk of your novel before a voice calls your name, and this time it’s the two people you’d been hoping to see all morning. Danica waves giddily at you and Jake, who’s picked his head up from where you thought he’d fallen asleep and is already mad-dogging Daniel. You wave back to Danica, and cast a quick glance down at your bathing suit before standing to greet Daniel. It’s just as tight and showy as you prefer it to be.

You pay no attention to Jake where he gets out behind you, too focused on Daniel to care. But perhaps you should have, because you’re two steps from meeting Daniel in the middle when Jake’s strong arm shoves you sideways, and your book is wrenched from your grasp as you fall sideways into the pool.

It’s cold, colder even because you’d been soaking in the hot tub. You’re surprised, but you suppose you can’t even really be mad at him considering it’s just payback for what he’d done to you.

You’ve barely righted yourself in the water before there’s another splash beside you, and when you finally emerge there’s hands reaching for your waist, Daniel’s as you realize he’d jumped in to help you.

“You-!” You splutter at Jake with bleary, chlorine-soaked eyes, attention split between Daniel who’s trying to ensure you’re alright, and Jake who’s snickering while holding your book in his thankfully dry hand.

“You asshole.” Daniel finishes for you, “She could have drowned!”

“I know how to swim,” You brace a hand on Daniel’s chest- startlingly bare, but riddled with coarse, brown hair, “It’s fine, I- I pushed him in earlier.”

“Relax, Prince Charming. It’s just a bit of payback. And look,” Jake waves your novel in front of you, “Dry as a bone.”

“Well I am- uh, not.” You stand half-submerged in the pool, Daniel still holding onto your waist, “So, I guess I will go swimming.”

“Great. You can swim with us.” Daniel smiles, warm and inviting as he keeps his hands on you.

“Yeah, us.” Jake agrees, taking Danica’s towel and spreading it over a sunny lounge chair for her.

Jake helps lower Danica gently into the pool, holding her hand while she takes the stairs, before jumping in beside you so that you’re splashed by the wave he creates.

“You are an asshole,” You laugh, breaking away from Daniel’s grip to shove at Jake’s shoulder. The grins on your faces are bright and genuine, perhaps the first time you’ve both been able to laugh with each other the entire trip. It feels nice, and you don’t fight when he shoves back at you with strong arms.

“Hey- hey!” Danica shouts, standing behind Daniel with a hand on his shoulder, “Why don’t you turn that pushing and shoving into a game of chicken?”

“I’m down,” Daniel seems thrilled to be opposite Jake as he lowers himself for Danica to climb atop his shoulders, “Y/N, you okay on his shoulders?”

Jake does the honors himself, dunking himself under the water and coming up between your legs. You barely have time to plant your hands on the top of his head, fingers twisting instinctively into his hair as you accidentally tug it while he stands at his full height again.

“Shit, sorry Hangman.” You let go of his hair, hoping you hadn’t yanked too hard. He’s forgiven, for now, so you won’t resort to childish things like hair-pulling.

“That’s okay, darlin’.” He grins, craning his neck back to meet your eye, “I like it when you tug on my hair.”

You have to overlook Jake’s suggestive comment as Danica’s already reaching for you, and you eagerly engage in a shoving match while the two men beneath you plant themselves into the bottom of the pool. You manage to get a leg up on Danica, and they’re both pushed backwards by the force of your shove, but Daniel surges forwards and ends up knocking you and his roommate right into each other.

You collapse against Danica, forehead-to-forehead, giggling like little girls. Her eyes are bright and shining with amusement, and her breath smells minty- like gum, not toothpaste. You’re more than happy to begin pushing at each other again, and though you’re confident your navy-built muscles are going to prevail, she lands a critical shove against your shoulder that throws you off-balance and sends you toppling off of Jake’s shoulders.

The water is cold, colder than you remember as you splash into it, and when you come up for air, already laughing, Jake’s facing you, having turned when you’d fallen from his shoulders. He’s grinning too, a hand already outstretched to help you up, but upon seeing you stand his eyes widen and his face drops.

“Shit.” He lunges for you, cutting through the water as his arm wraps around your back to yank you tight against his chest. You protest, grunting with exertion as you try fighting against his grip. But his muscles are impressive, and you’re trapped against his chest despite your best efforts.

“Would you cut it out? I’m trying to help you. Your top came untied.”

“What?” You splutter, water trailing down your face as you quell your instinctive struggle against his crushing hold. You realize that the reason for the extreme cold had, in fact, been because your bikini top had abandoned ship, and you barely have time to process the feeling of your bare tits slammed up against Jake’s hard, toned chest before he’s fishing the bathing suit out of the water and feeding it around your waist.

“Up,” He instructs, lifting his eyes to the expansive blue sky above you so that you can separate yourself from his chest for long enough to cover your own again. It’s- a strange gesture of courtesy that you would have expected from Daniel, sure, but not Jake. Perhaps that’s why you’re so sluggish, why it takes you longer than expected to fit your top back over your tits and grapple with the strings.

“You decent?” Jake asks, and when you grunt in confirmation he drops his eyes again. He notices you struggling with the ties and reaches for them himself, gently swatting your fingers away as he uses his advantage of sight. It presses his muscular shoulder up against your face, and you turn so that your cheek rests against it instead of your nose. Suddenly you’re held against his chest like a slow dance, and something terribly and inexplicably squirmy happens in your stomach.

“Done. I double knotted it.” He hums, and it’s such a sincere tone, one that’s completely vacant of all his usual dickishness, that you lose yourself staring at his face when he pulls away. You begin examining it for any sign that perhaps he was murdered and replaced with a poorly-trained doppelganger.

His hair looks right, albeit sopping wet. His eyebrows are growing slightly bushier than usual, but nothing you’d consider a complete and total imposter. His nose is still the same: strong, slightly downturned (though not as far as Rooster’s), and there’s a tiny patch of sunscreen that hasn’t been rubbed in near his right eye. His mouth is set in a determined purse as he double knots the strings of your bikini top together, and his eyes- his eyes are different.

Miles different than you’ve ever seen them. The outside edge of his hazel-green rings is softened, like someone has blurred their usual sharp border and lined it with suede. His pupils are huge, and they’d be eclipsing his irises if those weren’t so big and puppy-like. He is, in every sense of the word, gentle, inside and out.

Jake has never been gentle before.

“You alright?” He asks, and you snap back to reality with his large hands spread over the expanse of your bare back, the eyes that you’d been examining firmly and concernedly fixed upon you. Only a few meager strings separate his skin from yours, and you nod once, steadily as you gently push his arms off of you.

“Let’s go again,” You call to Danica and Daniel, your voice a piss-poor attempt at strength and nonchalance as it lacks its usual life, “Good hit, Danica. But watch out, I’m gonna kick your ass.”

“Bring it,” She grins gleefully, and her giddy gaze drifts downwards to Jake’s face when he lifts you onto his shoulders yet again. From the looks of it they share some sort of silent conversation- some inside joke that you’re not privy to.

Something about that, something about her excluding you from a conversation with your own teammate makes you shove her, not enough to knock her off of Daniel’s shoulders, but enough to show her that you’re not going easy on her. She shrieks giddily as she writhes to stay balanced on Daniel’s shoulders, a smidge less broad than Jake’s. You’re thankful for that, for the steady mount you’ve got, as you resume pushing and shoving at Danica.

Jake is going insane. Not only does the phantom sensation of your bare tits- nipples hard from the chilly pool water - stick to him like a wet t-shirt, he can feel you against the back of his neck, your warm sex nestled snugly against him with only the bottom half of your bikini to separate you. Your thighs bracket his head, close enough for him to reach out and bite at, but he has to focus on keeping his stance sturdy so that you can play properly. Daniel’s glaring viciously at him across the few feet that separates the four of you, and he’s not going to let Mr. Mailman win.

This time, Jake suspects you’ve used that military muscle of yours, because Danica slips backwards off of Daniel’s dewy shoulders and splashes into the pool. Your hand cups beneath Jake’s chin, tilting his head upwards and leaning it back into your lap.

“Nice one,” He grins upside-down at you, and you bump your fist against his when he offers it. Then you’re craning your neck down, surely uncomfortable as you leave mere inches between your lips and his, and his ears are ringing.

“Back up,” You murmur, disguising it as a congratulatory speech while Daniel helps Danica back onto his shoulders, “Get them to chase us and we’ll use the momentum against them.”

“Darlin’,” Jake proclaims, pride puffing up his chest that your legs are resting against, “You’re my kinda woman. Always looking to win.”

“Just do it, Hangman,” You scoff, but your eye-roll is less than irritated, fond if anything due to your partnership as Jake drops his head to face Daniel and Danica once more.

Jake stands in place where he’d been before, but when Danica engages with you he begins backing up. Slowly, carefully, ensuring that his feet are planted steadily each step so that you’re not tipped over, he makes his way towards the drop off towards the deeper end of the water. Daniel follows, taking the bait, and soon enough his predicament becomes obvious: he’s not as tall as Jake.

He stands somewhere close to six feet, surely, but not past it like Jake does. Your partner’s head is still comfortably above water, smirk in full force as Daniel’s beard becomes waterlogged.

“That’s not fair!” Danica laughs, petting sympathetically at Daniel’s sopping wet hair, “Poor guy, we’ll get you stilts for the next round.”

Daniel lands a teasing pinch against the curve of her ass and she shrieks. You lunge for her, using her momentary shock to catch her off guard as you send her tumbling backwards into the water behind Daniel.

You don’t have time to celebrate before Jake is ducking down and slipping himself out from beneath you, his strong arms bracing your fall so that you barely sink a few feet into the water. He crushes you in a celebratory hug, his laughter harmonizing with your own. He turns you both to face Daniel and Danica as they splutter to catch their breath, his cheek pressed flush against your own.

“Chicken Champions,” He declares, holding you tight to his side at his own height, which means your feet float above his own in the water, “I’d offer to go again, but that’d just be cruel. You ladies wanna chatter in the hot tub while Danny-Boy and I show off on the diving board?”

“I brought a book,” Danica hums, face dripping with water you feel only mildly guilty for submerging her in, “If you wanna read, Y/N, I’ll do it with you.”

“Perfect.” Daniel nods, already cutting through the water on his way to the diving board, “I’ll be careful not to splash you guys.”

“I won’t.” Jake supplies helpfully, his grin turned shit-eating as he eyes you up, “No point in reading one of them smutty porn books if you’re not soaking wet.”

“Splash me and I’ll throw your room key off the side of the boat, Hangman,” You promise, “You’ll be begging strangers to take pity on you in the elevator.”

“Nah, that’s not my style,” Jake’s voice is dripping with intent while Daniel takes position on the diving board, his swim trunks dripping steady trails of water. You don’t know why until he continues, taking his own bait, “I’ll leave that to Daniel.”

You blame Jake’s comment for why Daniel’s dive nearly turns into a belly flop. It’s instantaneous, really, Daniel’s changing of posture as he register’s Jake’s biting words, and you have half a mind to admonish Jake for riling Daniel up during a dive- that could have ended badly. As it stands, Daniel does a sort of cannonball, though not intentionally, and you and Danica cringe in unison when he lands, sending water splashing well over the divider into the hot tub. Your book remains mostly unscathed- only a droplet of water lands on the cover and obscures the male lead’s face, blurring out his beard and making him appear clean-shaven.

Jake is already scaling the ladder, and when he gets to the top he surveys Daniel emerging from the water.

“Six,” He shrugs, sneering down at Daniel from the highest point on the deck, “‘Could’ve clinched a seven if you hadn’t splashed the ladies, but your form was still shit.”

He doesn’t give Daniel a chance to fire back- or maybe the man is just too smart to take Jake’s bait - before he sets his arms together above his head, and seamlessly, impeccably cuts through the water. For someone so muscular and bulky, his form is graceful- not that you’ll ever tell him that. Water arcs outwards from where he’d landed, one half of the splash practically targeting Daniel where he stands watching.

He swims farther, nearly reaching the other end of the pool before he emerges, shaking water from his hair like a dog as he looks intently at you and Danica in the hot tub for a rating.

“Ten!” Your reading companion shouts, blessedly unaware of the tense atmosphere- or again, too intelligent to fall for Jake’s lowly antics- and you look at the water-stained cover of your novel.

You smear away the water droplet with your dry thumb, and the male main character’s beard returns.

“Four.” You call, voice deadpan as you lock your eyes on your novel, “For playing dirty and sabotaging the other contestants.”

Hangman’s grin is open-mouthed and cemented into place as he stands taller than Daniel in the water, tanned skin standing starkly out from the blue of the chlorinated water, “Dirty’s the best way to play, darlin’.”

Danica shoots you a look from behind the spread of her novel that you’ve sent many-a-girlfriend before. It’s the wide-eyed, restrained smile that screams ‘We’re talking about this later’, and you mirror her expression with your own disdain.

“Leave us alone,” You call, grinning apologetically at Daniel so that he knows he’s only a bystander, “We want to read.”

“Let’s leave the ladies to their smut, Dorian.” Jake calls, louder than he needs to be as he stretches to display his toned abdomen and muscled arms, “We can find our own fun. Wanna see who can swim the fastest? Place your bets, ladies: pilot or mailman?”

“You swam pretty slow when you crash-landed in the Pacific that one time,” You muse, fighting to keep a smirk off of your face, “I remember thinking you would die in the time it took for you to swim back to shore.”

“Wouldn’t’ve gone so slow if I wasn’t hauling my RIO back to shore. He hit his head on the way down,” Jake dips his head towards Danica, happily regaling her with the tale, and you realize you’ve only fluffed his ego more, “So he was unconscious. Well I couldn’t just leave him there, ‘poor guy was only a trainee. So I took him along. It did slow me down, but,” He heaves a disgusting, gaudy, fake sigh, “It was worth it to send him back home to his mama.”

You taste a hint of blood where you’ve apparently chewed through your lip. You let it go and hope nothing escapes your mouth. It would be a shame to stain the pages of your novel red.

You’re trying very hard not to pay attention to Jake and Danica where he’s engaged her in a staring contest. Well, you suppose it’s not much of a contest that she can win: the point is that you’re losing. Jake’s showing off his impressive build, still running his mouth with every vaguely self-complementary anecdote he can embellish, and Danica is taking the bait, which means that your rampant attempts to cool Jake’s ego have failed.

You let the warm, borderline-hot water sink into your skin and simmer alongside the building irritation that threatens to blow beneath the surface. You’re tired. This was supposed to be a relaxing vacation for you- or, if not relaxing, a good way to blow off steam. You were supposed to be bent in half up against the shower wall by now, not bending the pages of your book with the strong grip you’ve cemented onto them while you mediate Jake’s ego and the willingness of so many women to accommodate it.

Part of you wants to let loose and have fun- not with Jake, of course. Never with Jake. But part of you wants to act rationally, forget the constant rivalry between you two and let him shack up with whoever will show him her tits first. But the other part of you, the one that cheers every time he places second in a show of skill, wants to knock him down a peg. It’s why you’re so persistently humbling him- or, trying to, at least. Something about him putting on this cocky persona- erasing all human emotion to make way for pure sleaze puts you on edge, and you pity the fool who believes it.

You can’t tell if Danica’s that fool yet, because she’s turned back to her book with a smile, but to her credit she doesn’t ogle him while he’s swimming. It would be easy to- he’s all tanned muscle and gestures that show off just the right curve or vein. He knows how to preen, but Danica seems to be minding her own business. That makes it easier for you to read your own novel; you don’t feel like you have to keep an eye out for her anymore.

You’re not sure whether it’s a love for the act or a wordless competition to outswim the other that keeps Jake and Daniel occupied with lapping the pool for so long, but as more and more people filter out of their rooms and onto the deck, there’s not much room for recreation anymore.

“Are you done?” You ask Danica, peering over at her after someone unknowingly sends a wave of water straight for you both, narrowly avoiding soaking your novels.

“I think I’m done.” She nods sheepishly, rushing to stand and keep her book dry, “Should we run away before the men notice we’re leaving?”

“Excellent plan,” You laugh, but you can practically feel Jake’s eagle eye upon you as you race for your towel, leaving soaked footprints behind on the wooden deck, “We should go get some pizza. They’re making more now that it’s a little busier out here.”

“You shouldn’t stare like that.” Daniel’s irritatingly smooth voice, pitched up slightly from Jake’s and entirely free of Jake’s rugged charm, makes Jake’s lips yearn to curl into a sneer.

Jake pivots in the cold pool water to face Daniel rather unimpressed, a scoff begging to burst from his lips, “Like what?”

“Like she’s a piece of meat, or something.” Daniel’s arms are crossed, and Jake plants his feet firmly against the concrete floor of the pool.

“Oh, you’re so virtuous,” Jake drawls, his skin burning and not from the rays of sun hitting it directly, “You frenched her in an elevator, Daniel, you’ve got no room to be talking to me about class.”

“She wanted me to kiss her. She kissed me.” Daniel insists, and Jake laughs- actually laughs, a grit of his teeth and a forceful exhalation of air, “That’s different than staring at her ass while she runs away from you like you’d flip her skirt up at a drive-in movie theater.”

“Flipping skirts,” Jake laughs, sadistic grin in full force, “Daniel, I’m not that old fashioned! Please, she’s in a bathing suit that she chose, for a sex cruise that she booked, and you know what? She probably wants you to be staring at her ass in it. And you don’t seem too concerned with the other people on the deck, I’m sure a few of them are looking too. And are you worried I’m looking at Danica’s ass?”

“You’re not looking at Danica’s ass.” Daniel nearly bites his tongue in an effort to keep his voice level, “Because you’re not interested in Danica. You’re interested in Y/N and you can’t have her. She’s not yours.”

“She’s not yours, either.” Jake spits, and there’s a moment of silence where both men’s chests heave with barely-suppressed tension. Jake realizes that he’s admitted to Daniel that he has no real claim over you, but the other man doesn’t fight back against not having one of his own. But you are his, you are Jake’s, in the way you’d fallen asleep in his arms last night, in the look in your eyes when you’d stared into his own earlier, in the stain on his pajama pants.

You’d moaned his name- his name, not Daniel’s.

Someone knocks into Daniel from behind, backing right into him and nudging him slightly off balance.

“Oh!” The woman shrieks, “I’m sorry! I wasn’t paying attention.”

“It’s fine.” He offers her a tight smile, heading for the ladder, “Don’t worry about it.”

Jake hauls himself up out of the pool with nothing but his forearms, using his towel to dry his hair if only to show off the expanse of his chest to any who may be watching. He checks- you’re not.

“So,” Danica leans forwards into your space at the pizza counter, eyes meaningfully wide, “Tell me why he’s acting like this.”

“He always acts like this.” You scoff, and when she levels you with an unimpressed glare, you insist, “No, really! He’s just- everything is a competition to him, everything. I met his mom once, and she told me that he used to have races at the dinner table to see who could finish their food first. He kept making himself sick but as long as he’d beat his brothers he didn’t care. He always has to win, and right now, he’s competing for us.”

“No, he’s competing for you.” Danica corrects you, “Is he winning?”

“Hell no. He’s- he’s not really competing for me, not meaningfully. He just wants to say he ‘got me’, you know? That would be major bragging rights on the tarmac. But that’s exactly why I can’t give in- I can’t be known as the woman who slept with her fellow pilot! Then they wouldn’t see my achievements anymore, just my mistakes.”

“I get that.” She nods, “But how do you know he’s just gonna dump you?”

“I’ve watched him dump the whole of San Diego,” You scoff, “That’s what he does. He doesn’t do love, he’s the kind of guy who’s only ever interested in something quick and dirty.”

“Everyone does love.” Danica frowns, “Some people just start later in life than others. And I think he’s starting now. With you.”

“Love,” You laugh, and sure, it’s dramatic, but if it gets through to her, you don’t care, “A man who loves me would not have tormented me for my entire career.”

She tilts her head thoughtfully, “I think he does. Even if he doesn't act the way you think he should, even if he doesn't act the way you would, I think he does love you. I think he just loves differently. I think he's new to it. What has he done to torment you?”

You huff, grateful for the opportunity to vent, “He constantly tries one-upping me- again, he can’t lose. He just- he pokes and prods and teases me like we’re on the playground or something, and it’s non-stop. It’s not like he’s sweet most of the time and then there’s a few bouts of light teasing, it’s- it’s constant, and I can’t ever let my guard down, or I’ll lose.”

“So you’re fighting to win, too.” Her eyes narrow slightly, “Why?”

“Because. I can't be second-best, and I can’t be known as the woman who slept with her coworker. I’m not doing that.” You repeat.

“Oh," She laughs, "So you're both stubborn. You don't want to lose, either. But second-best is temporary, rankings come and go. And I understand your thing about not wanting to be known for sleeping with him, but even if you did sleep with him, the whole Navy doesn’t have to know.”

“They will, Hangman will brag. He always brags.”

“He won’t- not if he’s in love with you, not if you want him to keep it private.”

“He’s not in love with me-!”

“Four slices of Pepperoni, two cheese?” A large tray is placed between you and Danica at the counter you’re both leaning against, and it snaps the two of you out of your debate.

You turn to see one of the employees looking expectantly at you, and Danica stammers, “Uh, three cheese.”

“Sorry.” He smiles placatingly at her, scooping another slice onto the plate, “Three cheese.”

“Thank you.” You take the pepperoni pizza, leaving Danica to collect the cheese. You feel bad for walking away, even if you know she’s hot on your trail, but you feel frustratingly suffocated, like everyone is urging you to make the biggest mistake of your life and never considering why you simply can’t. She doesn’t know Jake, she hasn’t spent the last decade with him as he’s blown his way through tourist after tourist, bragging all the while. And he doesn’t understand what it would be like- even if he wasn’t looking to win, even if he did just want to try casual sex for fun, you’d never be able to escape that reputation.

You feel like you’re going crazy, and you plop down between Jake and Daniel where they sit at opposite sides of a table, ready to stuff your face with pizza instead of dealing with any of it.

feedback is greatly appreciated! comment, reblog, talk in the tags, send me a message, tell me what you think!

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elix8r · 1 year ago

Text

Monkey Bars (sjy) Part 1

Part 2

PAIRING: jake sim x fem!reader

GENRES: smut, fluff, crack, college au, frat au, enemies to lovers, exes to lovers, fwb, angst

WARNINGS (for this part): jake and Y/N being mean to each other (jake’s actually a menace), profanity, underage drinking, Jake does Beomgyu SO DIRTY like justice for my mans, intimate photos/video being seen by unwanted eyes, harassment (mostly verbal but it’s pretty upsetting), invasion of privacy, slut shaming, panic attack, jake seriously being an ass, mentions of stds, mean dom!jake, sub!reader, unprotected sex, oral sex (m recieving), face fucking, fingering, filming during sex, mirror sex, dumbification, humiliation

SUMMARY: Jake Sim was like the epitome of the perfect fourth-grade boyfriend. He had it all – being a year older automatically put him on the cool list (which in turn also boosted your popularity), genuinely kind, and very cute. But then, the earth-shattering truth that he was a two-timing cheater hit you like a ton of bricks. You caught him red-handed, holding another girl's hand and it devastated you beyond measure. So of course, in your nine-year-old mind, there was only one deserving punishment – a forceful push off the monkey bars during recess, resulting in a broken arm.

And so, the battle lines were drawn. You and Jake became sworn enemies, a feud that carried on even into college. You saw him as a total fuckboy who always knew how to get under your skin, while he saw you as a snobby bitch who thought she was better than everyone else. But fate, in its twisted sense of humor, had other plans. Out of a class brimming with a hundred other possibilities, it was Jake who ended up being your assigned partner.

Clearly, the world had favorites and you weren’t on that list.

WORD COUNT: 18.4k

AUTHOR’S NOTE: This took so long and I def struggled writing it compared to pink whitney but i think it mostly has to do with how different they are! I’m not sure how long the next part will be but I definitely think it’ll be in the double digits cause I still have so many scenes planned out so hopefully it won’t take too long lol also i’m sure you guys will have stuff to say about jake by the end of this part cause he highkey sucks so i’m excited to see what you guys have to say lol but guys seriously thank you smmmm for all the love i hope this doesn’t disappoint and I would love to hear feedback!! thank you thank you everyone 🫶

THE FRAT DIARIES MASTERLIST

GLOSSARY

You couldn’t help but label anyone who told you to rush as absolute monsters, and in this case, it's your own mother and older sisters donning the monstrous roles. The three of them were all former sorority sisters, passing down the torch of tradition to you as the youngest. Initially, you were all in and ready to dive into the frenzy, but soon enough, the harsh reality hit you like a ton of bricks. Going through recruitment wasn't a walk in the park; it required nerves of steel. You found yourself having to socialize with over a hundred girls just during the past week, and man, it was driving you to the edge. Your sanity was slipping away, and you couldn't shake the feeling that this whole ordeal might be straight-up violating your very essence as a human being.

Lucky for you, today marked the last day of recruitment before bid day—the day you'd finally sprint towards your new home, liberating yourself from what seemed like a never-ending torment.

"Can you believe that there's a possibility that we might become sisters tomorrow?" Wonyoung, your lifelong best friend since diapers, now your roommate and potential sorority sister, couldn't contain her emotions at the thought. Despite your mixed feelings about the whole process, you were grateful to have your partner in crime by your side through it all. The possibility of ending up in the same house together overly excited you.

"I'm keeping my fingers crossed that we're on the same brainwave when we submit our rankings." Alpha Epsilon Sigma was the only house in your schedules that the two of you had in common. It would be the sole path that would unite you under the same letters.

"I mean, you're practically at the top of AES' wishlist with your legacy status and connections through your sisters. I'm just hoping they like me as much as I like them," Wonyoung's face twisted with a mix of anticipation and apprehension, aware of the intricate politics surrounding her position.

To a certain extent, she had a point. However, your family made sure to stress to you the importance of choosing based on your own desires, rather than succumbing to their influence. "Don't stress too much. And as cliché as it sounds, I promise we’ll end up where we’re meant to be." Your words seemed to offer a glimmer of reassurance, soothing her worries.

"Thanks, girl." She pulled you in for a tight hug before bouncing off her seat. "Well, my first party's about to start, and I don’t want to be late so I’m gonna head out right now. Good luck with your last two houses today, and I'll catch you back at the dorms!" With a wave, your roommate dashed off, leaving you with your thoughts.

The next day arrived, and as you opened your envelope, there was no surprise when you saw a bid from Alpha Epsilon Sigma staring back at you. Choosing had proven to be more difficult than expected, given your initial bias going into recruitment, but you were pleasantly surprised by the outcome. However, it was clear that your heart had already made its decision. And it seemed that Wonyoung knew it too, judging by the ecstatic shrieks emanating from beside you.

"I got AES! We’re sisters!" She practically tackled you with joy, and both of you jumped around in sheer excitement over your matching outcomes.

"See? I told you not to worry." It was a challenge to contain your excitement as you joined the other girls who had received bids from your sorority, eagerly making your way towards the house. The realization that this would be your home for the next four years was simply unbelievable.

Greek Row was bustling with energy, each house boasting its own unique theme. Yet, your eyes were drawn to one in particular. The house you had visited throughout the past week seemed transformed, barely recognizable amidst the sea of red and pink enveloping its pristine white exterior. Massive heart-shaped balloons floated in the air as a gigantic banner cleverly proclaimed, "All You Need AES Love," took center stage. You could also spot your sorority’s letters standing big and proud decorated with pink and red hearts all over. Members of the previous classes dotted the lawn, each holding custom-made heart signs to warmly welcome the new members. Among the crowd, it was easy to spot Winter, the girl who had rushed you all throughout the week. She bounced up and down, hoping to catch your attention, and you couldn't help but smile as you spotted your name signed beautifully on the sign that she was holding up.

"Y/N!" She squealed with delight, enveloping you in a tight hug. "I just knew you'd be an AES girl the moment you walked through our door on that first day!"

Bid day was living up to your expectation as you were having an absolute blast. Every person you had met so far welcomed you with open arms, and the festivities showed no signs of slowing down. The music pumped, and the atmosphere was electric. It was clear that choosing AES was the best decision you could have made.

It was no surprise that as soon as it turned dark outside, everyone started ushering the new members to a frat house. Epsilon Nu offered to host the girls of AES and you were beyond excited to meet the frat. While you were no stranger to frat parties, you were new to EpNu as the only houses you’ve previously been to were Beta Tau Sigma and Nu Chi Tau due to your sisters. But the stories you’ve heard about EpNu made your hopes high about the boys. Rumor was that they knew how to have a good time and they were apparently all smoking hot.

While their house couldn’t compare to the grand mansion your sorority claimed to be home, but you were surprised. It was honestly not as shabby as you thought it would be and while it could be the effects of both the alcohol in your system and the light show that was throwing you off, you had to say this was the nicest frat house you had been in. So far, you had nothing to complain about.

As Waka Flocka's "No Hands" reverberated through the pulsating house, your body instinctively moved to the infectious rhythm, the alcohol adding to the blissful sway. Suddenly, a strong arm snaked around your shoulders, and the intoxicating scent of cologne filled your senses. Your body melded snugly with theirs before they leaned in, whispering into your ear.

"What's your name?" His voice jolted you, instantly recognizable and sobering. Slowly, you turned your head to face him.

Jake fucking Sim.

Out of all the people in the world, of course, it was him. The realization seemed to mirror his own sentiment, evident from the annoyance etched across his face. Disgusted, you pushed him away, eager to distance yourself from his unwanted proximity.

"Oh, fuck no. Fuck off," you shot him a withering look, brushing at your shoulders as if trying to wipe away any remnants of his presence.

"What the fuck are you doing here?" His question only served to reinforce your belief in his sheer stupidity. You rolled your eyes, mustering up the patience to respond.

"Really, Jake? Why do you think you dumbass?" The realization hit you that Epsilon Nu was the frat Jake belonged to, instantly eroding any remaining respect you might have had for the house.

"No way you got a bid from AES," he exclaimed incredulously, disbelief radiating from his eyes. "Only hot and cool girls go AES, and obviously, you're neither."

"You've clearly become even dumber since high school 'cause it seems like you've forgotten that I'm a triple legacy," you emphasized, feeling your blood pressure rise with every passing second of the encounter.

"Whatever, get away from me," he retorted, his face still contorted with disdain, prompting a scoff to escape your lips.

"You're the one who came over to me, you asshole." With that, the two of you abruptly turned away from each other, stomping off in opposite directions, each eager to put distance between yourselves. The excitement and joy that had previously filled bid day were now replaced by a sour mood.

Leave it to Jake to ruin everything.

Jake Sim had always been a familiar presence in your life. Your parents had a long-standing friendship, even before you were born as both your mothers were AES sisters back in the day. As a child, it was no surprise that you developed a crush on him. Not only was he kind and fun to be around, but he also had an undeniable charm that made your cheeks flush with a rosy blush. So when Jake asked you to be his girlfriend with a candy ring on the first day of fourth grade, you eagerly accepted without hesitation.

The initial weeks of being Jake Sim's girlfriend were filled with happiness and excitement. Everyone was envious of you for landing one of the most popular guys in the grade above. Holding hands during recess and sharing your first kiss felt like pure bliss. But as they say, good things often come to an end. And for you, that end came crashing down when you witnessed a devastating sight that shattered your world.

There he was, on the swings, holding hands with an older girl from his grade. Your heart sank, and the weight of betrayal was almost unbearable. Overwhelmed with sadness and anger, you found yourself sobbing uncontrollably, seeking solace from your teacher, who ultimately had to call your mother to pick you up from school.

The following day, you arrived at school with tear-stained eyes and a fire burning within you. Jake Sim was going to face the consequences of his actions, and you were determined to make him pay. During recess, you spotted him on the monkey bars with that other girl, and something inside you snapped. Without thinking, you approached him from behind and pushed him off, the red haze of anger clouding your vision.

The sound of cries echoed through the air as Jake landed with a thud, clutching his arm in pain. It was an instant and unfortunate consequence of your impulsive act. However, instead of deterring him, the pain seemed to fuel his own retaliation. In a matter of seconds, he tackled you down, causing you to scrape your knees and get a bloody nose in the process. Parents were called, hospital visits were made, and the aftermath left a lasting scar on both of you.

Jake blamed you entirely for his inability to play soccer for two months, and your favorite dress was ruined, stained with blood and forever unwearable. Despite your parents' continued friendship and the physical proximity that remained between you and Jake, the damage inflicted upon your relationship was irreparable. Resentment grew, and any shared feeling between you two was one of animosity.So it would be no surprise that you spent the next couple of days before classes started holed in your dorm room not wanting to risk coming across him.

The previous year had been a period of bliss for you, as Jake had finally graduated, leaving you to enjoy your senior year without the worry of him ruining anything good in your life. When you received acceptance into HybeU, your dream school and your parents’ alma mater, you knew Jake was already a student there. However, the opportunity was too precious to pass up, and you were determined to not let him deter you from pursuing your dreams once again. Besides, the campus was vast, and the chances of running into him seemed unlikely. Little did you know, fate had other plans in store for you.

As you walked into your first class on the opening day of the semester, you couldn't help but notice a familiar figure entering the room. It didn't take long for him to spot you either, evident from the loud groans that escaped his lips. He was accompanied by an attractive guy, presumably one of his fraternity brothers. As your eyes met, a mutual eye roll ensued, and Jake wasted no time in turning to his friend, whispering animatedly while gesturing in your direction. It was all too typical of him.

However, due to the large size of your Relationship 101: College Edition class, with approximately two hundred students, you assumed that there would be no reason for the two of you to interact. If you both sat on opposite sides of the room, it would almost feel as if he wasn't even a part of the class. However, once again, it seemed that you were about to be proven severely wrong.

"As mentioned in the syllabus, this class will be graded based on attendance and the end-of-semester group project. If you attend class and adhere to the project rubric, it will be an easy A. However, even a slight deviation from those requirements will result in a poor grade. The groups for the project will now be assigned, and there will be no changes allowed," Professor Choi explained, exuding both kindness and firmness. Her instructions were clear, and you were determined to follow them to the letter.

You listened attentively as she began calling out the names of your classmates, letting people know who they would be working with for the next couple of months. The atmosphere in the room was filled with anticipation and curiosity.

"Y/N L/N and Jake Sim," Professor Choi announced. Your head snapped up, momentarily thinking you had misheard her. Groans erupted from the other side of the room once again, accompanied by laughter from Jake's friend. The whole class turned around, perplexed by the commotion that was previously missing when the names of all the other pairs were called out.

"Is there an issue here?" Professor Choi's confusion mirrored the reaction of the class as she addressed Jake.

"Uhm, kind of... I mean, I'd just prefer not working with her," Jake's blunt response triggered snickers from the class, leaving you feeling embarrassed as you felt heat rise to your cheeks.

Professor Choi's face turned stern, clearly unamused with his attitude. "Well, as I said, you will be stuck with the partner I have assigned you. It would be better for both of you to resolve whatever is going on quickly, as it would be most beneficial for your grades."

Her response silenced Jake, and both of you nodded in agreement. With that, she resumed calling out names, but the classmates continued to whisper, clearly entertained by what had just unfolded.

"So, what's up with you and him?" The girl next to you nudged you, curiosity gleaming in her big, bright eyes. Her pink hair added a vibrant touch to her friendly appearance.

You debated whether to reveal the history between you and Jake to a stranger, but she seemed harmless, so you decided to share. "Well, Jake and I have known each other our whole lives. We had a falling out when we were young, and it has lasted until now," you explained, adopting a nonchalant tone to downplay the significance of the situation.

She seemed genuinely interested, urging you to continue. "Wait, what happened?"

Letting out a sigh, you continued, "We dated in elementary school, but I caught him cheating on me so I broke his arm."

Her unexpected burst of laughter caught you off guard. "You're still beefing over something that happened before neither of you even knew how to do algebra?" You frowned slightly, annoyed that she didn't seem to take it as seriously as you had hoped.

"Well, it's not just that!" you quickly defended yourself. "After I broke his arm for cheating on me, he made it his mission to ruin my life. All through middle school and high school, I felt like I was living in a nightmare cause of him. We genuinely hate each other, which is why it's so frustrating that we now have to be partners. It's a serious issue, and if I could I would even drop the class because I don't trust him with my grade, and I can't handle being around him for a whole semester."

The pink-haired girl quickly realized the severity of the situation as she listened to your impassioned rant. "Oh, wow, this is actually a big deal. Damn, Professor Choi really set you up."

"Yeah, I'm fucked," you sighed, feeling the weight of stress settling in. Dropping the class wasn't much of an option, considering it was a requirement for your major.

"Well, if it helps, I want you to know that I'm fully on your side. Fuck that Jake guy. I mean, who even cheats? Just cause you’re a kid doesn’t excuse you’re actions!" she declared passionately, her sincerity shining through. Her words brought a smile to your face.

"Oh, wait, I forgot to introduce myself. I'm Lily!" she exclaimed, extending her hand.

"Thanks, Lily. I'm Y/N, and it's nice to meet you," you responded, reciprocating the handshake. "Maybe you'll be the one who helps me maintain my sanity throughout this class," you added, half-joking and half-serious. Nonetheless, you genuinely appreciated the connection and friendship forming between you.

Throughout the rest of the class, you and Lily chatted, getting to know each other better. You discovered that she was also involved in Greek Life, a member of Nu Mu Chi, and a first-year student like yourself. The shared similarities made the conversation flow effortlessly, and you even exchanged numbers and Instagrams. Engrossed in your newfound friendship, you almost forgot about your problem. Keyword: almost.

Almost a week had passed since the first day of classes, and it was already Thursday. Fortunately, you hadn't run into Jake throughout that time. You knew that sooner or later, you would have to interact with him, but you had no issue with pushing it until the very last moment. However, you couldn't deny that the project seemed like it would take a great deal of time. Professor Choi had revealed on Wednesday that it would entail each group turning in a project that was over one of the topics she had picked out and listed on a Google Doc. She gave students a lot of freedom, allowing the project to be presented through various means like movies, websites, podcasts, or anything else the group wanted.

If you had been lucky enough to have a different partner, you would have been fully invested in this assignment, as you enjoyed showcasing your creativity through different outlets. Unfortunately, this class, due to circumstances and the partnership with Jake, was turning out to be your most challenging, even more so than physics. On the bright side, your other friends seemed to have a much better first week than you did, with nothing but good things to say about school so far.

"Are you sure you don't want to come?" Wonyoung asked, curling her hair at her desk, looking like a doll. In contrast, you were lounging on your lofted bed, wearing pajamas and glasses, engrossed in one of the Harry Potter movies while working on an assignment.

"Oh yeah, I'm good. I don't think I want to go to EpNu anytime soon," you replied, barely lifting your gaze from the movie.

She sighed. "You know, you shouldn't let Jake ruin everything for you. It was like this all throughout high school. Aren't you tired of it? Just come with me and the girls. We'll be with you the whole time, and you won't even remember that he was there." Her words were convincing, and EpNu's back-to-school party was known to be one of the best. However, your mind was set as you shook your head at her offer.

"I'm fine seriously. You girls go have fun. Text me if you need me to come get you anytime," you assured her, focusing your attention back on the assignment.

Wonyoung nodded, giving up on trying to convince you any further. "You look amazing. Take your shot with that cute pledge you were telling me about!" You teased her, causing her to blush before she headed out.

It was late into the night, and you were watching the last Harry Potter movie of the franchise when you received a call from Wonyoung. It seemed like she had decided to take up on your offer.

However, when you answered the call, the voice on the other end wasn't the one you were expecting.

"Hey, is this Y/N?" The male voice was barely audible over the deafening music in the background. You immediately became alert upon hearing the unfamiliar voice.

"Yes, it is. Is Wonyoung okay?" You quickly asked, getting up to put on your sweatshirt and shoes, ready to go and help your friend.

"I'm Jungwon, and I'm with Wonyoung right now. She's had a lot to drink, and I think she needs to go home. She keeps murmuring your name, so I thought you would be my best bet." By now, you were already outside your dorm, hurrying to your car, worried about your best friend.

"Okay, I'm heading there right now. Jungwon, can you keep her company until I get there?" Wonyoung had always been bad with her alcohol, and you had hoped she would pace herself, but it seemed like she hadn't.

"Yeah, of course. I'll see if I can get her a glass of water to help her sober up," you could hear the concern in his voice through the music, and you were relieved that she wasn't alone.

You reached the house in record time, and from the outside, the party looked like absolute chaos, with a massive crowd inside. At the door, a tall boy stood manning the door, almost like a guard dog for the frat. You barely spared him a glance though, as you were focused on your mission, not knowing where to start inside the massive house. Your attempts to call Wonyoung went unanswered, indicating that her phone was likely dead.

As you weaved through the sweaty bodies, you finally spotted a familiar face. Winter was lounging on one of the couches with a group of sisters and unfamiliar faces.

"Winter!" You rushed over to her.

"Oh my god, you're here!" Winter, clearly having had a few drinks, was even more energetic than usual. She pulled you into a hug before turning to introduce you to everyone.

"Everyone, meet Y/N! She was my rush crush! I love her so much; she's like a little me!" Winter still hadn't let you go, and everyone greeted you. While you appreciated her enthusiasm in making you feel welcome, you were more focused on finding your friend than meeting new people.

"Hey, nice to meet you all," you greeted them briefly, lacking the energy they were exuding. "Has anyone seen Wonyoung? She's my best friend, and I'm here to pick her up. She's tall, pretty, and has long hair," you gestured with your hand, indicating her approximate height. "I think she was with Jungwon?" You hoped that providing this additional information might jog their memories, but they shook their heads.

"I'm sorry, Y/N, I haven't seen her since she came up to the main level with Jungwon. Oh! Maybe Jake will know! Jake, come over here!" Winter called out, spotting a familiar figure. You wanted to object, but you decided to prioritize finding your friend over your issues with Jake.

As Winter enthusiastically waved at him, Jake noticed your presence and briefly squinted his eyes annoyed you were here before turning back to Winter. "What's up?"

"Y/N here is looking for her bestie Wonyoung, who was last seen with Jungwon. I was wondering if you knew where they might be?" Winter explained.

You could tell he was retracing his memory as it took him a second before responding. "Oh, actually, I might know where they are." He didn't wait for you to follow, immediately turning and walking in a direction. You quickened your pace to keep up with his longer strides.

He headed towards what you remembered as the kitchen, and you were correct, seeing a group of people surrounding a box of pizza and various alcohol stashes. However, Jake continued walking past them, toward a door located at the back. Without hesitation, you followed him, entering what seemed like a secondary kitchen. The room contained drink machines, pantry shelves and an industrial sized refrigerator that made you wonder what it held, but the room itself was dark and empty. Both you and Jake appeared surprised by this unexpected outcome. They weren't here.

"I thought they'd be here," Jake softly murmured, turning to you. Upon closer observation, you noticed that he, too, seemed slightly intoxicated and possibly high, with bloodshot eyes.

Letting out a frustrated huff, you expressed your displeasure at the wasted time. "Well, clearly they aren't. Can you think of anywhere else they might be?"

He took a moment to ponder, and with your patience wearing thin, you were about to walk out when you noticed a flicker in his eyes. Suddenly, he grabbed your wrist and swiftly led you back to the main room. Confusion washed over you, as physical interactions with Jake were rare. Nevertheless, you followed his lead as he pulled you up the stairs, realizing that he was likely taking you to Jungwon's room. It dawned on you that checking there should have been your first instinct.

The room you arrived at was down a corridor, and without bothering to knock, Jake barged in.

His intuition had been correct, as you spotted two figures inside. One was hunched over a trashcan, vomiting, while the other held their hair back.

"Oh, fuck, Wonyoung!" You quickly rushed to your friend's side, ready to help her in her vulnerable state.

"Oh, thank god you're here," Jungwon let out a sigh of relief. It dawned on you that this was the first time you were meeting the boy your friend had been eyeing since they met at the party on bid day.

"Yeah, sorry it took so long. We couldn't find you guys, but thanks for being here with her," you quickly thanked him.

Wonyoung seemed to have stopped throwing up and quieted down. She wiped her mouth with the back of her hand and turned to you, slurring your name. "Y/N?"

"Yeah, Won, I'm here. Let's get you home," you said, attempting to help her up. However, her lanky body proved difficult to move.

You had momentarily forgotten about Jake, but you were quickly reminded of his presence as he reached out to assist you and Jungwon in lifting your friend.

"Here, let us handle her. You should probably make sure she has everything," he suggested. Following his advice, you spotted her phone on the side of what appeared to be Jungwon's desk. Your assumption was correct; it was out of battery.

The boys carefully guided Wonyoung down the stairs, and you could hear her softly murmuring nonsensically. You were certain your friend would be embarrassed by this situation when she woke up the next morning, but that was a problem for later.

As the four of you reached your car, you opened the back seat while Jungwon took charge of ensuring Wonyoung got in safely and buckled up.

You turned to Jake and, though reluctant, couldn't help but admit that you would have never found her without his help. "Thanks, Jake."

Jake seemed unaccustomed to hearing your gratitude and brushed it off quickly. "It's fine. Anyone would have done the same," he responded, his tone almost shy. Before you could make any further comments, the car door slammed shut.

"Hey, can you have her text me in the morning so I know she's okay?" Jungwon's concern was still evident, and you mentally noted your approval of the boy your friend seemed interested in. He seemed to be one of the good ones.

"Yes, of course. Seriously, Jungwon, thanks so much for taking care of her. It was nice to meet you," you said before getting into the car.

"Nice to meet you too, Y/N. Drive safe and good night!" Jungwon bid farewell as you drove off. Through the rearview window, you thought you spotted Jake giving you a small wave, but you decided to brush it off as your eyes deceiving you.

Your assumptions proved correct as the next morning, while you were in the midst of getting ready for class, your roommate woke up. To your surprise, she remembered much more than you had anticipated, and she was clearly horrified by her actions.

"What if he never talks to me ever again?" Wonyoung groaned, her head buried underneath her pillow. However, you highly doubted that outcome, considering how genuinely worried and caring Jungwon had been last night. It was clear that he was just as smitten with her as she was with him.

"Stop being stupid. Just text him, and it'll be fine," you assured her, relaying Jungwon's request from the previous night. With a spritz of perfume, you finally felt ready to head to class. You assumed your friend, who was still sulking in bed, planned on skipping. However, you had no choice but to attend, as your Relationship 101 class had mandatory attendance.

You liked to arrive early to class, so it was a surprise to see a figure sitting in the seat you usually occupied when you walked in. Jake, who was notorious for being late or arriving just on time, being here so early was highly unusual. He wore a cozy-looking hoodie and appeared tired, likely due to the party. Feeling skeptical, you cautiously approached your usual desk, mindful of Jake's presence.

As if sensing your arrival, Jake turned his head towards you the moment you reached your desk. He seemed to be nursing a mild hangover, squinting slightly at the change in lighting.

"Good morning, Y/N," he greeted you. It took you a moment to process his words, considering it had been a while since he had greeted you, let alone said anything that wasn't an insult.

Not letting your guard down, you replied with a curt greeting before settling into the seat beside him. Just as you were about to ask him why he was in your seat, he beat you to it.

"I know you're probably wondering why I'm in your seat, but I thought about it yesterday after you left and figured it would actually help us get a good grade in this class if we worked together, like Professor Choi mentioned. Since it's a required course for my major and it doesn't seem like we can convince her to assign us, different partners, we'll have to suck it up," he explains, his voice lacking its usual cockiness and sounding surprisingly sincere. This newfound maturity in Jake catches you off guard.

"Same here. It's required for my major too," you respond, realizing that he might be in the same department as you. What would be the chances? "And yeah, I expected us to have this conversation eventually, but I didn't think it would be today, especially since it's only the end of the first week of classes. Honestly, I didn’t even think you’d care about this that much."

"Well, contrary to what you might believe, I actually take my grades seriously, and I'd rather start now and aim for a good grade than procrastinate and fail," he retorts, sounding annoyed by your comment. "Besides, the more work we finish quickly, the less time we'll have to spend with each other."

His words made sense, and you couldn’t really argue against them. "Yeah... I guess you're right. I can't afford to fail this class either. But if we keep getting on each other's nerves and fighting like we usually do, I don't see how we'll get anything done."

"Are you really so prideful that you can't put your ego aside for an hour to work with me? It's literally about your grade," Jake's tone was starting to irritate you as he made it seem like you were the sole instigator in your rocky relationship.

"Fuck you, Jake. Clearly, I'm not the only one with ego issues since you've willingly participated in our fights as well," you retorted, rolling your eyes. For a moment, the two of you sat in silence, neither willing to speak, fearing that it would escalate the situation further.

Finally, you sighed and gave in, realizing that Jake had no intention of breaking the silence. "How about this? We dedicate a few hours each week to working on this project and during that time, we promise to genuinely try to work together—for the sake of our grade. Outside of those hours, we can go back to how we usually are and not interact at all."

For the first time in a long while, Jake seemed to have no comeback for your suggestion. It even actually appeared to look as if he was considering it as he slowly nodded his head. "Okay, fine. I guess I can do that."

“Glad we could come to an agreement, now can you go back to your seat? Our agreement doesn’t extend over to us being seatmates.”

The two of you had agreed to meet at the library the following Wednesday, and as you expected, Jake was running late. It was already thirty minutes past 7, and you were seething with anger. As you started packing up your belongings, preparing to leave, you heard heavy footsteps approaching from behind.

"Hey," Jake said nonchalantly as he sat down in front of you. His casual attitude made your eye twitch. Didn't he realize that you had been waiting for him for half an hour?

"Hey? That's all you've got to say? You're 30 minutes late!" Frustration surged within you, pushing you closer to your boiling point.

He simply shrugged. "Sorry, I guess." His lackadaisical response caused you to stand up from your seat in anger.

"You do realize that I have other things to do, right? You literally just wasted my time! You're so fucking selfish. You could've at least texted me. Whatever, I can't do this with you," you fumed, turning around to leave the desk.

But before you could make your escape, you felt a hand grabbing your wrist, preventing you from leaving.

"Wait, Y/N, stop. Practice ran late, and I came straight here without checking my phone. Seriously, I'm sorry," he explained, his hand still wrapped around your wrist.

Sighing, you closed your eyes for a moment, trying to calm down your anger before responding. You were only letting it slide as he seemed genuine. "Fine, just please don't let it happen again, or at least send me a text. I'll let it slide this once because I don't want to start our sessions on a bad note."

Jake nodded, and you put down your bag, taking a seat again.

"So, have you thought about what you want to do? I checked the topic list, and there are a couple that I think we could consider. The hookup culture topic seems the most fun and interesting though, especially because there's a section on Greek Life. Since we're both involved, I was thinking that we could maybe provide a more nuanced perspective," Jake suggested. It didn't surprise you that he was interested in that particular topic, given his reputation as a serial playboy. He probably had a PhD in hookup culture with the number of girls he had been involved with. However, the subset of Greek Life did intrigue you too, as it would allow you to draw from personal experience.

"I haven't gone through the list yet, but that does sound interesting," you quickly pulled up the document and realized that this topic would probably the most entertaining to research.

"Yeah, I'm fine with us choosing that. Maybe we can do a podcast, as it would be an easy way to voice our opinions and share examples from our personal lives." Jake nodded, liking your suggestion. He was quite a talker so he had no problems with having to record a couple of episodes.

"Sounds good to me. We can start researching now and create a solid outline to determine how many episodes we'll need to cover everything thoroughly. The campus radio station has equipment that students can borrow, so we don't have to worry about that," Jake suggested.

Both of you immediately began your research by accessing the library database and looking up relevant articles and books on the chosen topic.

"What's your major? You mentioned earlier that this class is a requirement for you, and it is for me too. I was curious," you decide to finally ask the question that had been on your mind since last Friday.

"I'm majoring in Human Development and Family Sciences and I’m in pre-nursing. Ultimately, I want to become a nurse, specializing in pediatrics. So I thought this major would be a good fit," Jake replied. His choice of major was unexpected, considering you had assumed he would be more of a business bro like the majority of fraternity members tended to be.

"Damn, that's not at all what I was expecting. I'm actually in the same major, although I'm more inclined towards becoming a family therapist," you shared. It was a surprise to both of you that you were pursuing the same field of study. Perhaps you and Jake had more in common than either of you had initially thought.

"What classes are you taking right now?" Jake continued the conversation, clearly invested.

"Other than this one, I'm taking Human Geography, English Literature, and Intro to Physics," you replied, noticing Jake's interest piquing at the mention of the last class.

"You're taking physics? How are you liking it? I took that last year and I'm currently in the seminar class for it. It's definitely one of my favorite classes," Jake shared, surprising you with his nonchalant tone and genuine enthusiasm.

"You like physics? Why?" you asked, genuinely curious and somewhat taken aback. His passion for the subject seemed almost foreign to you.

"I don’t know, It's just something I enjoy. I mean I've always found it fascinating. I liked it even in high school," Jake explained, his enthusiasm evident. It became clear that he had a genuine love for physics, and you couldn't help but feel a tinge of envy, considering your struggles with the subject.

"Wanna do my homework for me then? I think I'm going to fail," you joked, expecting a dismissive response. To your surprise though, Jake seemed to be genuinely considering your offer.

"I mean, yeah, I could probably help you. Who's your professor? I had Professor Song last year," Jake offered, surprising you once again. You had been seeking help from anyone willing, but finding someone competent enough to assist you and go over the subject was proving to be a challenge, as it seemed physics was universally disliked.

"I have Professor Song too, but you're joking, right?" You were desperate enough to consider getting help from Jake, but it seemed almost too good to be true.

"No, I'm serious, I promise. I think I ended that class with an A last year," Jake assured you, displaying a side of himself that contradicted any preconceived notions you had about him.

"Okay, yeah, that would actually be so much help. Thanks," you expressed your gratitude, and with a nod from Jake, the two of you resumed working on the project.

What was happening? Within just an hour, you not only had a civil conversation with Jake, but he had even offered to help you with your schoolwork. However, this didn't mean that the two of you would suddenly become best friends. After all, a decade-long feud couldn't be resolved with a single conversation.

Every week since that Wednesday, you and Jake had agreed to meet up once a week to work on the project and for him to provide you with tutoring. You had to admit that this schedule was working quite well, although it still presented challenges. You and Jake would bicker more often than not, and his talent for getting on your nerves hadn't disappeared. However, your relationship with him was nowhere near as tumultuous as it had been for most of your life. In fact, you had even decided to attend the mixer that your sorority was organizing with EpNu tonight.

"And he even brought me coffee to my first class today! He's perfect," Wonyoung gushed, practically melting as she recounted what Jungwon had done for her. Ever since the party at EpNu, Wonyoung's relationship with Jungwon had been progressing, as she had even met his parents a couple of days ago and it seemed like they were on the verge of making it official. It warmed your heart to see her so happy.

"That's adorable! I can't believe you found such a great guy, especially considering he's a frat boy," Yujin, your sorority sister and next-door neighbor, commented while searching for her misplaced vape that she always seemed to be losing.

"It's behind the futon, Yujin," you helped her out before turning back to Wonyoung. "Yeah, seriously, Won, I'm glad he's treating you well. And if he ever does anything wrong, he probably knows that I'll give him a good beating or something, but it's still sweet."

"Yeah, I can't wait to see him tonight. Honestly, I'm just happy that you've overcome your fear of EpNu and decided to join us. I mean, we've been to mixers with other houses before, but trust me, they don't compare to EpNu. There's just something different about them," Wonyoung expressed her excitement.

An '80s Aspen-themed mixer between AES and EpNu was happening tonight, and even though you had sworn to never attend any event involving Jake's fraternity, your improved relationship with him during the past month working on the project made you reconsider. Outside of your study sessions, you still had to restrain yourself from getting into fights with him, but your tolerance for him seemed to have made an improvement, even if it was minuscule. Besides, the theme sounded too fun to pass up.

"Wonyoung, you're just biased because of your lover boy. But I do have to admit, they really do go all out. No wonder they're top tier here. And let's not forget about all the hot boys. I mean, Y/N, remember when you almost fainted a couple of weeks ago when you saw Heeseung at Starbucks? I swear she was drooling like a dog in heat," Yujin chimed in, playfully teasing you. You rolled your eyes at her remark, but she had a point so you let it slide as you accepted the shooter she handed your way. There was no denying that you really did have a hard time breathing for awhile after seeing EpNu’s president while getting your coffee.

One of the boys from the frat offered to pick you guys up from the dorms, so you and the girls headed downstairs in your neon ski outfits, making a quick stop to pick up another one of your sisters, Yuna, who lived on the floor below.

Beomgyu, as expected from EpNu, was incredibly attractive, and he drove a Tesla. So you had no problem accepting the passenger seat.

"Hey, I don't think we've met yet. I'm Beomgyu," the boy turned to you with a smile.

He was so cute that you almost forgot to respond, but you managed to introduce yourself. "Hey Beomgyu, nice to meet you, and thanks for picking us up. I'm Y/N." He shook your hand and flashed another smile before heading towards the house.

Your phone buzzed, and when you checked it, Wonyoung had sent you a text. "Seems like you have a good chance of getting lucky tonight ;) He's cute, and you're into older guys, so it sounds like a perfect match."

You rolled your eyes in amusement. You definitely weren’t opposed to what she was suggesting.

The house was noticeably different from your last visit, as it seemed less chaotic. The interior was adorned with fake snow and blue decorations, and everyone was dressed according to the theme. You couldn't help but be impressed by the level of dedication EpNu had shown, surpassing any other fraternity on campus.

Wonyoung quickly separated from the group bidding everyone a goodbye, before running off eager to find Jungwon. As she ran away, Beomgyu turned to you before offering you a drink. You, of course, accepted.

"You've probably been to the kitchen before, but let me share a secret with you," Beomgyu said, guiding you past the kitchen towards a familiar door at the back. "You probably haven’t been here before, but this is where we usually stash the good stuff that we don't want to share with everyone else."

You remembered the back room where you and Jake had searched for Wonyoung and Jungwon, and like last time, it was empty. "Actually, Jake showed me this room last time I was here, but he never mentioned this was where you boys stored all the good stuff."

"Wait, why were you guys back here then if not for the drinks?" Beomgyu furrowed his eyebrows.

"We were looking for Wonyoung and Jungwon," you explained.

"Oh, okay," he replied, not entirely convinced but choosing to brush it off. Beomgyu opened the industrial-sized fridge, revealing it to be fully stocked with drinks.

Your eyes lit up with excitement, prompting Beomgyu to laugh. "Go ahead, take your pick." You didn't need any further encouragement as you reached for a peach High Noon, thrilled to see your favorite (and very overpriced) drink available.

"Thanks, this is awesome! High Noons are my favorite, but I rarely go out and buy them cause I just can't justify spending $10 on a four-pack," you remarked. Beomgyu laughed at your reasoning while also grabbing the same drink before leading you back out.

It seemed like your entire sorority had decided to attend the mixer, as you noticed sisters constantly arriving through the front door. While mingling with others in the main room, you met numerous new people.

The tall boy you had seen at the door on your previous visit turned out to be a pledge named Niki, who greeted you warmly with a hug. You could tell he was already plastered. You were also introduced to Sunghoon, a brother you had actually known of as his striking looks had garnered much talk amongst your sisters. However, you decided to keep your distance from him after simple introductions due to the rumors of his alleged knack for getting people pregnant (Winter’s friend?). Getting pregnant in college was definitely not on your bucket list so it was better to be safe than sorry. And, of course, you were officially introduced to the EpNu president, who once again left you feeling a bit lightheaded with how hot he was. Fortunately, the alcohol in your system had loosened your nerves enough for you to at least exchange names.

Throughout the night, you and Beomgyu got significantly closer since he seemed to stick by your side, occasionally whispering things that made you laugh while wrapping his arms around your waist. Perhaps Wonyoung was right — it seemed like you had a decent chance with the older boy.

While you were enjoying yourself, from the other side of the room Jake was in a sour mood as he was sporting a frown. He had a rough time at practice and Jay had been talking his ear off all night. Jake loved his brother but wished more than anything that he would go bother Ningning instead. He wasn't in the mood to entertain Jay's chatter. As his eyes scanned the room, Jake's attention was quickly drawn to you and Beomgyu, who appeared to be getting quite close. He didn't even know that you knew each other, but for some reason, the sight bothered him deepening his frown. When he saw Beomgyu's lips meet yours, he found himself speed-walking in your direction before he could even stop himself.

"Hey, Y/N, can I talk to you about something?" Jake's familiar voice interrupted, causing you and Beomgyu to separate. You shot Jake a glare, annoyed that he was once again ruining something for you. However, his face was sporting an unfamiliar serious expression that caught your attention.

"Uh, yeah, okay. I'll come find you after, Beomgyu," you said, turning to the boy you had just been kissing before following Jake. He led you towards the hidden room at the back of the kitchen.

As expected, the room was empty, and Jake faced you with a serious look in his eyes. "You know Beomgyu has chlamydia, right?"

Those words made your jaw drop, and your eyes widened as any previous effects from the alcohol vanished. "What?" you practically screamed, struggling to comprehend what he had just said.

"Uh, yeah, I probably have no place telling you that, but I thought you should know though, especially since it seemed to be getting pretty heated between you two," Jake said, avoiding eye contact as guilt washed over him. Beomgyu didn't actually have chlamydia and he was silently praying that his friend would never find out about what he told you. He knew he was an asshole for lying about something like this but he was convinced that his reasons justified his actions.

Jake and Beomgyu were like two peas in a pod, and Jake knew him better than anyone. They were essentially the same person, boasting the highest body count among their brothers. Jake was well aware of how Beomgyu treated girls, and despite his lingering resentment towards you, he felt it would be cruel to let you become just another conquest for Beomgyu.

You were still in shock for a few seconds, as all thoughts of Beomgyu instantly vanished from your mind. Would he have continued with you and never mentioned his condition if Jake hadn't interrupted? The disdain you had for Jake earlier was now replaced with a deep sense of gratitude towards your childhood enemy.

It took you a moment to find your voice. "Jake..." Your words trailed off, as you were still shaken by the realization of what could have happened that night. In that moment, you knew there was only one appropriate response.

A hug from you was the last thing Jake expected, and he stood frozen, unsure of how to react. The last time you had hugged him was back in fourth grade when you were dating, and his body seemed to have forgotten how to respond to physical touch from you. It felt like an eternity before you finally pulled away.

“Thanks, Jake seriously, I know we’ve never had a good relationship but this semester is slowly showing me that maybe I’ve judged you too harshly,” and hearing these words from you left Jake blushing the rest of the night.

However, this wouldn’t last as Monday rolled around and the second he stepped into class, he was met with the sight of your furious self storming towards him, with Beomgyu by your side. Oh God, he was fucked.

You spent the rest of Friday night sticking close to your friends, hoping to avoid Beomgyu for the remainder of the evening. When Saturday came around, you found yourself recounting the events of the previous night to Winter (who you were now pretty sure was going to be your big), when she took you out on a lunch date. As you shared the story, Winter's eyes widened with surprise.

"Wait, hold on. What?" Winter's eyes bulged as she struggled to comprehend what you were telling her. Beomgyu was a good friend of hers and they ran in similar circles, so she was utterly perplexed by what she was hearing.

"Yeah, I know, isn’t it so fucked up? I mean, he must have known that we were likely going to hook up, or at least that I was down. The fact that he didn't mention anything and continued to initiate things is insane to me. I may have hated Jake for most of my life, but at least he's not the kind of jerk who would let me sleep with someone who has an STD." You were still heated about the situation and continued to rant, unaware that Winter's surprise stemmed from something else.

"Y/N, hold on. I don't think Beomgyu has chlamydia." Your words came to a halt in the middle of your sentence. What?

"He's a really close friend of mine, and if any of us knew he had something as significant as an STD, it would have spread among our group. Sure, he's a whore, but he's also careful and would never engage in a sex without disclosing that information, he’s not that much of an asshole. I'm really confused now." The confusion on your face mirrored Winter's words.

"Was Jake just mistaken, then? Or maybe Beomgyu only told Jake because it's not something you'd be eager to share with everyone," you pondered, but Winter shook her head, dismissing both possibilities.

"Let me call Beomgyu right now to confirm because I truly don't think this is true." You agreed, realizing that the only way to clarify the situation was to speak directly with Beomgyu.

As soon as Winter posed the question to Beomgyu, you could almost sense the offense in his voice as he vehemently denied it.

"Wait, wait, wait. Jake told you this? Is that why he pulled you aside last night, and then you avoided me like the plague?" The three of you were now embarked on a mission to uncover what might have prompted Jake to share this information, considering Beomgyu was one of his close friends.

"Maybe he just didn't want you two to be together because he hates Y/N and doesn't want his friend involved with her?" By now, the phone call transitioned to a Facetime video, and you could see Beomgyu shaking his head in frustration.

"Then why the fuck would he make up something about me and not about her? I mean, I didn't even know who she was until last night, hell, I didn’t even know they knew each other until Y/N told me that Jake had already shown her the private kitchen!" Beomgyu was practically seething at this point, but Winter turned her attention to you.

"Jake showed you the backroom kitchen?" Winter's question (that she practically screamed out) caught you off guard, as you struggled to see its relevance to the situation. "That's where the EpNu boys take girls to hook up!" Ah, now it all made sense.

"Wait, what?" Confusion overwhelmed you. "I swear, I didn't do anything with him! I would never! Wait, then why did you take me back there?" Beomgyu's face flushed red as your question was now directed towards him.

"Well, uh, I mean, I didn't actually take you there to, like, do anything with you. It was just to give you a drink and maybe plant a seed in your head so that we'd go back for more drinks and, you know, maybe something would happen then?" Winter rolled her eyes at her friend's explanation. It was all too typical of Beomgyu's behavior, but that was the least of everyone’s problems right now.

"Okay, whatever, that's beside the point. Why did Jake take you there then?" Winter redirected the conversation, refocusing everyone's attention on the problem at hand.

"To find Wonyoung and Jungwon! Oh my god, is that why you looked like you didn’t believe me when I told you that yesterday?" Beomgyu nodded while Winter let out a sigh.

"Y/N, do you think there's any possibility that Jake likes you? Maybe he got jealous seeing you with Beomgyu and told you this lie in the hopes that you would stay away?" Beomgyu gasped dramatically as if Winter had just uncovered the truth.

Your reaction, however, was quite different, as you shrieked in disbelief. "No way!" The idea that Jake had orchestrated this entire situation out of jealousy seemed far-fetched to you. There was absolutely no way.

Little did you know though, Winter had actually cracked the code. Jake's actions were indeed driven by jealousy, even though he himself was unaware of the true motives behind his behavior.

And now, here he was, facing the consequences of his actions. You and Beomgyu had (quite literally) dragged him into an empty classroom next door, and he felt like a child being caught in trouble by his parents.

"Explain," Beomgyu's stern voice was all Jake needed to hear to understand the gravity of the situation.

"I'm sorry!" Jake's inability to handle pressure became evident once again, as a single glare from you made him crumble. "I just saw you two together and thought it would be a terrible match. I mean, seriously, bro, out of all people, her?" He realized he was only digging himself deeper by insulting you.

"I mean, come on! She's like the absolute worst! The actual devil incarnate, and I can't have my best mate being involved with her!" Jake's attempts at persuasion fell flat, as neither you nor Beomgyu were buying any of his bullshit.

"Then why did you make up a lie about me instead of her?" Beomgyu's frustration reached its peak, leaving Jake spluttering, unable to come up with a satisfactory answer.

It became clear that both you and Beomgyu were done with Jake. Beomgyu finally put an end to his blubbering. "Dude, just stop. If you were interested in her, you should have just told me. I would have respected the bro code and backed off. But what you did was beyond fucked up, man. I don't even know if I want to see you around anymore, at least not for a while. Just stay away and try not to fuck things up even more. This could have gone so bad for me." With that, Beomgyu stormed off, not sparing Jake a single glance.

Meanwhile, you remained behind, still looking at Jake, but with a different expression in your eyes. It was disappointment that he saw, and it made Jake feel sick to his core. "I've always known you were a shit person ever since you cheated on me as a kid, but this time you've crossed the line. Don't bother trying to talk to me ever again." With those words, you followed after Beomgyu, leaving Jake to sit alone, grappling with the repercussions of his actions.

You weren't joking about not wanting to see him, as Jake waited for hours at your usual spot in the library, hoping against hope that you would show up. But there was no sign of you. The drive back to his fraternity house was filled with silence, as regret coursed through him. Jake couldn't wrap his head around his own actions. The flimsy excuse he had concocted while lying to you now seemed utterly nonsensical, and shame engulfed him.

The dynamics within EpNu were strained as well. Everyone was well aware of the situation and how Jake had betrayed one of his closest friends and brothers. He could sense the judgment radiating from the pledges, which only amplified his feelings of patheticness.

"It's going to take some time, but I know Beomgyu's not cruel enough to ice you out forever. Personally, I would have probably beaten the shit out of you, but I guess Beomgyu's a much better person than I am," Jay nonchalantly remarked while engrossed in playing Animal Crossing on his Switch.

Sunghoon kicked the chair that Jay was occupying, rolling his eyes at his friend's lack of sincerity. "You're not helping him. Look, you're only making him more depressed," Sunghoon nudged the back of Jay's chair once again, gesturing toward Jake's huddled figure underneath his comforter. "Jake, dude, you just have to rip the bandaid off and apologize. Sincerely."

Sunghoon's words struck a chord with Jake. He hadn't properly apologized yet, as neither you nor Beomgyu had given him the opportunity to do so. But he had to keep trying.

The lack of response from Jake's bundled-up figure made Sunghoon sigh. He had been moping like this for hours, and Sunghoon was growing tired of it. Jay, though seemingly less concerned, also still cared about his best friend.

Out of nowhere, Jake felt his emotional support comforter being yanked away from his body, and then he was forcefully dragged off his bed. While his bed wasn't that high, the impact of hitting the floor still hurt quite a bit.

"What the fuck!" he yelled at the instigator. However, Sunghoon remained unfazed and continued in his attempts to lift Jake, who showed no intention of getting up from the floor.

"Jesus, why are you so heavy? You're not even that tall," Sunghoon remarked, making Jake whip his head around in annoyance at the taller boy’s jab.

"Get off of me, dude. Let me be. I deserve to be on the floor like the trash I am. Pure basura," Jake moped, continuing to resist Sunghoon's efforts, which showed no signs of relenting.

Suddenly, another pair of arms joined in, as Jay decided to step in and help Sunghoon. The sound of bodies hitting the floor and yells filled the hallway as the three of them engaged in a wrestling match. Unfortunately for Jake, he was fighting a losing battle against two taller and gym-obsessed individuals. After a brief struggle, they easily dragged him towards a specific door.

"Leave me alone! Go bother your girlfriends or something! Seriously, stop!" Jake's pleas fell on deaf ears as Jay held him down and covered his mouth, while Sunghoon knocked on the door with urgency.

They had intentionally dragged him all the way to the other side of the house, where Beomgyu and Taehyun's room was located.

The moment the door swung open and Beomgyu and Taehyun saw the scene before them, it was immediately slammed shut. Undeterred, Sunghoon continued knocking, persistently and loudly.

"Go away!" someone shouted from the other side of the door, but Sunghoon refused to give up, intensifying his knocking.

"We're going to stay here until one of you opens the door!" Jay yelled back, still holding Jake down, who was desperately trying to squirm free.

Once again, the door was yanked open, but this time it wasn't instantly shut. "What do you want?" Taehyun's intimidating glare sent shivers down Jake's spine. In contrast to his cute appearance, Taehyun was definitely someone Jake didn’t want to mess with.

“He’s got something to say to your friend,” and with this, Sunghoon barged into their room pushing Taehyun aside which allowed for Jay to push Jake inside as he also followed suit and shut the door behind him.

Whilst the room itself wasn’t that small when it housed two people, with five grown boys in it though, it was becoming uncomfortable, especially with the stare Taehyun was continuing to give him. Beomgyu seemed to be looking anywhere but at him, obviously still pissed, and Sunghoon elbowed Jake in an attempt to get him to start talking.

“Ahem well, uh uhm so uh well,” Jake’s stuttering instantly got Jay groaning in what seemed to be a mixture of disappointment and embarrassment at his friend’s lack of poise.

“Jesus Christ, just get out,” this was the first time they had heard Beomgyu’s voice and he was clearly annoyed that Jake had gone against his wishes of wanting to be left alone.

This however seemed to get Jake to finally compose his thoughts and actually speak. “Wait, wait, wait. Just hear me out.”

Silence filled the room for a couple of seconds before Beomgyu finally let out a sigh signaling for Jake to continue.

"Okay, to start off, Beomgyu, I want to apologize sincerely. I understand that this might not mean much to you at the moment, and I don't expect you to forgive me right away, if ever. But I believe this is the least you deserve. I truly am sorry. You're one of my close friends, and I have no excuse for my actions. I keep replaying that night in my mind, searching for a reasonable explanation, but I can't find one. You were right, Beomgyu. If this had become public knowledge, it could have had serious consequences for you, and I deeply regret putting you in that situation." Jake maintained eye contact with Beomgyu, his voice reflecting his sincerity.

"I want you to understand that I'm willing to do whatever it takes to earn back your trust, even if it means giving you the space and time you need. You should know that you mean a lot to me, and I appreciate you hearing me out today." The room fell silent as everyone's gaze turned to Beomgyu, waiting for his response.

Time seemed to stretch endlessly for Jake until Beomgyu finally spoke. "You're right. I can't forgive you right away because what you did was seriously fucked up. However, I appreciate your apology. It shows that you regret your actions and that our friendship still matters to you."

Though he hadn't completely reconciled with his friend, Jake felt a sense of victory. Prior to today, he hadn't even been able to approach Beomgyu, let alone have a conversation with him. He would take whatever progress he could get. He was genuinely committed to working hard to restore the trust between them.

With a nod, he stood up and made his way towards the door, his two friends following closely behind. However, just as he was about to leave, he heard his name being called.

"If you genuinely can't understand why you did what you did, then you're even more oblivious than I gave you credit for. Think about what I told you the last time we spoke; it might provide some clarity." Jake was well aware of what Beomgyu was alluding to, but he struggled to come to terms with the harsh reality.

Had he really betrayed his friend for a girl? Even worse, not just any girl, but you?

This newfound revelation continued to haunt Jake in the following weeks. It didn’t help that, reaching out to you proved to be a much more challenging task compared to Beomgyu. Unlike Beomgyu, who lived with him, you were not in close proximity. Since the last time he saw you, you had blocked him on all platforms, and whenever he attempted to approach you, you (along with your friends) never gave him the slightest chance to speak. As time passed, he found himself gradually losing his sanity and sleep over you. He couldn’t understand how he could go from hating you all his life to suddenly developing a crush on you within a couple months. Like there was no explanation behind it and that was putting him in misery.

"Ugh, that creep showed up again, but I told him to fuck off," Lily remarked with a hint of annoyance as you got to your usual seat. Ever since that first day, you had become close with Lily, and after confiding in her about what had happened, she became fiercely protective of you. She acted like a guard dog, ready to bite at any moment, scaring Jake away whenever he tried to approach you in class.

You rolled your eyes in response to Jake's persistence. "I thought he would have given up by now."

Before Lily could reply, Professor Choi's voice cut through the conversation.

"I assume everyone remembered to submit your project proposal papers by last night?" Professor Choi's words caused you to audibly gasp, drawing the attention of a few heads.

Unfortunately, you had completely forgotten about the deadline, and judging by Jake's reaction from across the room, it seemed he had too. Dealing with Physics on your own since you had let go of your previous tutor had kept you busy. Although you had performed well on the test for that class the previous day, you had compromised your grade in this particular assignment, and you felt like crying.

The next hour, you tuned out Professor Choi's lecture, feeling down as you hurriedly wrote up the proposal in hopes to submit it, even though it would likely be graded as late. You knew your grade would still suffer but it was better than a zero.

Just then, your phone buzzed next to you. It was a message from Winter. "Jake wants me to ask if you turned in the project proposal."

You huffed, realizing that you couldn't solely blame Jake for not submitting the project proposal since you hadn't done so either. As it was a group project, you shared the responsibility, but you still felt annoyed that it meant you would likely have to confront him face to face about it.

It took you quite a while to gather the courage and suppress your pride before finally getting out of your car and arriving at the EpNu house. In the daylight, the house appeared entirely different, and you felt a sense of intimidation, especially since you came alone. Standing in front of the door, you contemplated whether to knock or simply enter when the door suddenly swung open, relieving you of your dilemma.

"Oh, hello? I didn't realize someone was at the door. How can I help you?" The boy who greeted you seemed familiar, but you couldn't recall his name.

He had an angelic look about him, which caught you off guard as he appeared quite different from the typical EpNu boys. Don't get it wrong, he was undoubtedly handsome, but compared to the likes of Jake, Jay, Heeseung, and even Niki, he exuded an almost innocent aura.

"Um, I was just wondering if Jake is here?" you asked timidly, feeling a bit embarrassed about your question.

The boy smiled angelically again and pointed upwards. "Yeah, Jake hyung is in his room. It's the first one on the left. Oh, by the way, I'm Sunoo! Nice to meet you. I think I've seen you before. Are you an AES?"

"Thanks, and yes, I am! Nice to meet you, Sunoo. I'm Y/N," you replied, unable to hide your delight. His friendly demeanor helped alleviate your previous nervousness.

"Of course! I have to go to class now, but hopefully, I'll see you around again!" Sunoo waved before departing.

As you made your way in the direction he had indicated, you noticed that the house was surprisingly quiet. Finding Jake's room wasn't difficult, and you said a little prayer before mustering up the courage to knock on the door.

It took a while before you could hear any movement from inside the room, and after a couple of seconds, the door finally swung open.

Jake's eyes widened in surprise at the sight of you standing there. You were the last person he expected to find at his door.

"Hey, Y/N. Uh, what are you doing here?" Jake asked, clearly confused but still letting you in.

"I submitted a terribly written and rushed proposal that I wrote during class, hoping it would be enough to atleast get us some points. I think we need to discuss what we're going to do with the project," you explained, taking note of the slight messiness of Jake's room, with some clothes scattered on the floor. It seemed he had a roommate who was currently out, and the room’s layout seemed similar to Jungwon's room.

"Oh yeah, thanks so much for doing that. Sorry that I forgot too and yeah, I think we should work on it together again. But, Y/N, can I just start by—" Jake began, but you interrupted him.

"Jake, just stop. I'm not interested in hearing you out. I don't plan on being friends with you, and I'm only here because we're assigned to work as partners. I think it would be best if we changed our plan and just created a website or something. It might be the easiest option, allowing us to work on it separately. Let's split the work in half and focus on our respective parts, so we don't have to meet up," you stated firmly, noticing the dissatisfaction on Jake's face.

"No, that's fucking stupid. If we don't work together, how will it be cohesive? We've already received one bad grade for the project; we need to make the final product good enough to compensate for the proposal," Jake retorted, causing you to frown.

"Well, sorry, but I really don't want to have to see you. I know I'm being stubborn right now, but can you blame me for not wanting to work on this with you? Besides, I admit I'm also responsible for forgetting about the proposal, but if you were so concerned about our grade, then why didn't you take care of it and submit it on time then?" Your voice started to rise as the conversation heated up. As usual, you and Jake couldn't seem to agree on anything.

"I don't know! I'm sorry, I just assumed you had already turned it in or something. But seriously, you're being absolutely ridiculous. Just get over it! It's just one project, and we only have like two and a half months left. There's something seriously wrong with you if you can't handle working with me on a project that determines our whole grade for the class!" Both you and Jake were now yelling loudly, and unbeknownst to both of you, the distance between you was narrowing.

"You just assumed I would take care of it? What the hell, Jake? And I did try to work with you. In fact, we were working pretty well until you decided to fuck everything up by lying! Jake, you're being so selfish—" You were abruptly cut off as Jake's lips met yours.

Amidst his anger, all Jake could think about was how hot you looked, with your furrowed eyebrows and wide eyes. The next thing he knew, he was leaning forward, connecting your lips together. As he fully realized what he was doing, he didn't back away; instead, he deepened the kiss. A small part of him knew that he had been fantasizing about this moment for weeks by now.

You, on the other hand, was extremely caught off guard and frozen for a few seconds. But as you felt the warmth and softness of his lips, you began to respond, gradually easing into the kiss. Hesitant movements transformed into more assertive actions, as your teeth clashed and your mouths opened wider.

Obviously, this was not at all how you expected your visit with Jake to unfold. If it were a few months ago, you would have slapped Jake for pulling something like this, but right now, something within you made the anger dissipate, replaced by an unexpected desire for your childhood ex-boyfriend.

Jake's hands found their way to your waist, where a sliver of skin was showing and you couldn't help but let out a soft moan into the kiss as you felt his hands slowly caressing up your skin. His fingers traced the bottom of your bra hesitating, almost as if he was asking for permission to go further and you responded by leaning further into his frame fully giving him consent.

Your lips detached for a quick second to take off your shirt and bra before reconnecting with the same fervor as before. Jake couldn’t believe how soft you felt under his fingers as he roamed his hands all over your breasts before testing the waters out by softly rubbing your nipples with his thumb.

Your head shoots backward in pleasure which Jake took advantage of as he leaned down to mark your exposed neck. His hands were now working their way down your body, and you shivered as you felt his fingertips trailing lower and lower. This time he didn’t wait for you as you felt him quickly yank your pants down along with your underwear the second he reached them.

You could see Jake sporting a familiar smirk as he observed your bare body.

“Fuck, Y/N. Look at yourself, you look like a slut. I mean you’re already wet and I’ve barely done anything.” Jake proceeded to whip you around making you face the sliding closet mirror that was located on the other side of the room.

His words filled you with humiliation yet you couldn’t help but find yourself getting wetter at the scene you were met with. His hand had snaked up to your neck, holding you in a way that made you look directly at yourself in the mirror, and his other hand was making its way to your core.

His fingers slowly rubbed at your clit before entering you with no warning. His finger was thicker than your own that you were usually used to, inciting you to lean into his frame, having a hard time keeping yourself up with the amount of pleasure you were feeling. Jake’s observation seemed to be correct as you seemed to be sopping wet with the squelching noises that could be heard as he moved his finger in and out of you.

His hand on your neck had become tighter and you could feel how hard he was becoming from behind you. “Please Jake…” You begged, wanting more.

“Please what?” He chuckled at your desperation. “You want another finger?” Once again, without hesitation, he added another digit inside of you cutting off any sound coming from within you. His fingers moved at a fast pace and your hands moved to be on top of his as if it would give you stability. The scene in the mirror looked like something out of a porno and Jake almost wanted to stop and reach for his phone to capture this moment.

You felt incredibly full and you couldn’t even imagine how his dick would feel if this was how you felt with just his fingers. You couldn’t tell if you were feeling lightheaded from his hand wrapped around your throat or from his fingers deftly moving inside your core, but either way, you could feel yourself being close.

“I’m almost there, please,” you whimpered out feeling his thumb moving harshly against your clit whilst his fingers quickened to bring you to your release.

Something inside you snapped, and suddenly, you lost all control over your body. It's as if a surge of electricity coursed through you, blinding your senses and the only thing you could do was moan. Just before you collapsed to the ground, Jake swiftly caught you, preventing the fall. Your eyes remained shut, taken by the overwhelming pleasure that washed over you.

He withdraws his fingers, slick with your essence, and raised them towards your face. "Open," he instructed, and without a moment's hesitation, you complied, parting your lips as he slid his fingers into your mouth.

The lewd sight in the mirror of you sucking his fingers only fueled his growing impatience. Unable to wait any longer, he swiftly spun you around and forcefully threw you onto his bed.

As he hovered above you, Jake assumed an aura reminiscent of a predator closing in on its prey. In this particular scenario, you found yourself willingly embracing the role of the prey, ready to be devoured by him.

Jake finally started to take off his clothes, and you couldn’t help but feel your entire body becoming hot at the sight. There was no denying how incredibly attractive Jake Sim was, and your mind went into overdrive as you eagerly observed his body. His toned figure was no surprise as he was an athlete but what took you aback the most was his dick.

No wonder he walked around like he owned the world. With a dick like his, you couldn’t blame him. He was the biggest you’d ever seen as he seemed to reach his mid-thigh with a thickness your mind could barely comprehend, and you were almost skeptical that he would even fit in you. It was pink with prominent veins and glistened as precum covered his tip. You couldn’t help but admire how pretty his dick looked as it stood proudly in front of you.

“Holy shit Jake…” You gaped with an almost concerned look on your face and this causes him to smirk at your response. Nearly every person that he had been with had given him the same reaction and he didn’t mind at all, as it boasted his ego to a new extreme.

“Fuck, you’re so big,” your mouth watered as you watched Jake giving himself a couple of pumps before moving to hover over you.

“Yeah, think you can take it, princess?” You quickly nodded eyes locked with his, determined to take all of him in you.

You could feel him moving his hips closer to yours as his tip slowly moved against your entrance, teasing you. "Well, considering how fussy you always are about everything, I'm not really sure you'd be able to handle it," he further teased, flashing a mischievous grin. He pretended to ponder the idea of whether to insert himself in you or not, leaving you on the brink of exasperation as you let out an exaggerated whine. Despite, still being sensitive from cumming earlier, you couldn’t care less as the only thing on your mind was having him in you.

“Jake please, I need you in me right now,” you were on the verge of crying out of frustration and it felt like forever before he finally gave in to your wishes.

He plunged his entire length into you without pause and you could only gasp while latching your hands to his biceps. The stretch was foreign and painful, yet you wanted more. You were right, as the fullness you were currently feeling was incomparable to before, in fact, it was nothing you’d ever felt before in your life. And when Jake started to move inside you, once again not giving you time to adjust to him, you seemed to lose all control of your body.

You were incredibly warm and it was almost painful how tight you were gripping him. “Fuck, Y/N, you’re so tight. You sure you’re not a virgin?” All you could do was shake your head unable to fully form words barely comprehending him.

His pace quickened and he couldn’t help but groan at the sight of your cum from earlier coating white all around his cock. You felt like you were perfectly made to fit him and if he could, he would want to spend the rest of his life impaled in you.

Your eyes started to well with tears. It almost felt like too much as your sensitivity from your previous orgasm lingered yet Jake was ruthless, rutting in and out of you without giving you time to even breathe. Your moans and whines along with his grunts progressively got louder and by now, neither of you could hold them back and you were sure his neighbors could audibly hear everything that was going on inside his room.

“Mmh Jake, so good. So fucking good,” you whimper while latching your nails to his back needing to hold on to something. His name seemed to be the only thing roaming in your mind.

Sweat was dripping from him as his eyebrows scrunched indicating how concentrated he was in the act. He was determined to make you cum again and when he spotted a stream of tears escaping from your eyes, he couldn’t help but tease you. “Thought you said you could handle it? You’re moaning like a fucking slut. Does it feel that good?”

You failed to answer him too engrossed in how he was making you feel and this causes the smirk on his face to widen. “Not able to talk back now, huh? Fucking dumb slut.”

If he was speaking to you like this anywhere else, you would have instantly bit back, yet under him it was as if you lost all autonomy, unable to produce any words. You indeed were being fucked dumb. You shook your head as tears continued to roll down your cheeks, feeling humiliated at his words, yet you felt yourself tightening your grip on his dick indicating how turned on you actually were by his words.

“So close, so so close,” you’re finally able to pant out tightening your grip on him, holding onto him as if your life depended on it. You could also feel Jake being close as his grip on you tightened and breathing became more erratic.

And with a harsh pinch that Jake gave you on your clit, you came. Hitting you much more intensely than before, the impact of your orgasm was overwhelming, causing your eyes to roll back and a sharp gasp to escape your lips. In the heat of the moment, you bit down hard on your lip, feeling a metallic tang as the taste of blood instantly filled your mouth.

Jake continued to thrust in you, pace getting sloppier as he felt himself getting closer at just the sight of you cumming. He grunted one last time before unloading himself in you and dropping his weight on top of you, yet too tired, you didn’t attempt to push him off. In fact, it felt as if all the energy had been drained from your body as the next thing you knew, you found yourself slowly waking up in a dark room, obvious that it was nighttime. The two of you must have passed out afterwards, as Jake laid sound asleep next to you, oblivious to your awakening, his snores filling the air.

The weight of your actions crashed down on you with a sudden and overwhelming force. You had just slept with Jake, your sworn enemy, and a wave of shame washed over you. You struggled to comprehend how you allowed yourself to succumb to such a situation, and a desperate urge to escape consumed you.

You ran to your car as if your life depended on it, desperate to leave the scene behind. Nausea churned in your stomach, almost having to pull your car aside a couple of times, and the very thought of what transpired hours earlier filled you with regret. Sure, you were all for fucking him earlier, but now all those emotions had transformed into self-disgust.

“Wonyoung, just kill me now and take me out of my misery!” You begged your roommate, the humiliation evident in your voice. Back at your dorm, your roommate had anxiously awaited your return as you had missed all her calls, unaware of the events that had unfolded. With a heavy heart, you recounted the details, laying bare the truth of what had taken place, adding to your own misery and shame.

Unfortunately, your best friend seemed far too amused by your distress. "Aha, I knew it! All that 'hate' between you two was just unresolved sexual tension! It took you long enough," she giggled, plopping herself down on your bed while you buried your face in your pillow.

"What the fuck, Won? You're not helping," you cried out, feeling a sense of betrayal at her lack of empathy regarding the utter seriousness of the situation.

"Hey, why are you so upset? It was consensual, and he's hot as fuck, so what's the problem? Oh my god! Was he bad? Or did he have a micropenis? Remember when I hooked up with that guy who had one? It was terrifying." If you could see her face, you'd laugh at her genuine concern. However, you were in no laughing mood as it was almost painful to admit to her that none of her worries were relevant. The soreness between your legs that made it hard for you to walk up to your dorm and marks on your neck that looked as if you were attacked proved that point all too well.

"No, it wasn't any of that. Ugh, I hate to admit it, but that was probably the best sex I've had in a while. I mean, he was huge, like porn-star level big, and his hands... the way they wrapped around my neck-" You caught yourself, realizing you're about to divulge more explicit details. It dawned on you that you had nothing but positive things to say about your sexual encounter with Jake.

Wonyoung's eyes widened, a devilish grin spreading across her face. "Oh my god, Y/N! Keep going! I want to hear all the juicy details!"

"No! Geez, Won, I don't ask you to tell me about everything you do with Jungwon, so stop being weird!" While clearly not offended by her, you definitely were slightly concerned by how invested your roommate seemed to be in your sexcapade.

"Oh, are you interested? Because I'm more than willing to share. I mean, he was here yesterday while you were in class, and we-" You cut her off, making a sound of surprise at her confession.

"Here? In our room?" Your eyes widened.

"Yeah, where else do you think we go?" Her nonchalant tone sharply contrasted with your own. "Don't worry, babe. We've never touched your stuff, except for that one time we made out against your bed, but we moved to mine before we actually did the dirty deed," she casually confessed which you were sure she was doing on purpose to mess with you. You let out a high-pitched squeal at the revelation, quite disturbed.

"Oh my God, I'm crashing at Yujin's tonight! I don't think I can sleep here knowing what you just told me." You hastily grabbed your pillow and made your way out, fully determined to spend the night next door with your other friend.

"Sweet dreams, babe! Love you lots!" Wonyoung's voice trailed off as you made your hasty exit.

The next time you had your Relationship 101 class, you found yourself nervously sweating, unsure of how things would unfold between you and Jake.

"Hey, Y/N! Do you think we can meet up later after my practice to work on the project? Sunoo told me earlier that the library was closed because of a burst pipe, but we can meet at the house if you're available," Jake popped out of nowhere before suggesting. It was nowhere near any of the scenarios you had imagined in your head.

The way he addressed you, as if nothing had happened between the two of you a few days ago, left you utterly flabbergasted. You stared at him in disbelief before managing to utter a response.

"Wait, uh, what?" It was all you could muster, feeling yourself get hot at just the sight of him out of embarrassment (and maybe a little horniness).

"Yeah, he told me something went wrong on the second floor, and it messed up the entire pipe system. The library will unfortunately be closed indefinitely. I hope none of the books got soaked; that would be terrible," Jake genuinely expressed his concern for the library, completely oblivious to your astonishment.

"Um, yeah, I guess that works for me," you meekly replied, trying to match his nonchalant tone. If he wasn't going to bring it up, you figured there was no reason for you to do so either.

"Okay, bet! See you later!" He then walked away, leaving you to still process everything that had just happened.

Feeling just as nervous as last time, you approached the EpNu house but you figured that it would be better to get over with it so without hesitation, you opened the door and stepped inside.

However, this time, you noticed that there were a few people around, and the sound of activity came from the kitchen. As you closed the door behind you, Jay popped his head out from the kitchen door, wearing a smile as if he had been expecting you.

"Hey, Y/N!" You weren't particularly close to Jay, but you knew he was one of Jake's best friends, along with Sunghoon. You also knew he was dating Ningning, one of the older girls you had become close with, so his friendly greeting didn't seem out of place.

"Hey, Jay! How have you been? Ningning mentioned how Mrs. Jung caught you trying to sneak in. I hope she didn't give you too hard of a time." Your house mom had a keen eye for things, and it was rare for anything to escape her.

"Yeah, she literally popped out of nowhere and scared the crap out of me. Sunghoon told me the back door wouldn't be guarded as there were no cameras there, but it seems Mrs. Jung caught on that people were using it because she found me as soon as I got in. But that won't stop me," he shrugged. You had laughed when you first heard the story, and it was still amusing to hear how Jay had been caught.

"Well, do you want a slider? I made a bunch because the guys were complaining about not having any food." You were never one to turn down food so you nodded without hesitation.

He handed you a plate with four mouthwatering sliders. "Here, take two for Jake as well. He was wanting one earlier." The fact that Jay knew exactly who you were here for caught you off guard for a moment, but then you remembered that he was Jake's closest friend so you brushed it off.

"Sure thing! Thanks so much for this they look so good, and better luck next time with Mrs. Jung!" you said, bidding Jay farewell before making your way up the stairs toward the familiar room.

You knocked twice, and the door swung open instantly, as if Jake had been eagerly awaiting your arrival. He greeted you with a wide smile, and his eyes lit up with excitement when you handed him the plate of food.

"Oh hell yeah, Jay’s a fucking legend for this!" Jake exclaimed, grabbing a slider from the plate before passing it back to you. You followed suit, taking one for yourself. Jake's assessment was spot on because the moment the food touched your taste buds, you couldn't help but gasp at how good it was.

"Holy shit, this is amazing!" you exclaimed, and Jake chuckled at your reaction.

"Yeah, Jay is probably the best cook in the house, after the actual cooks, of course. He's always willing to make something for us. Last week, he made steaks for me and a few of the guys, and it tasted like it came straight from a fancy restaurant," Jake boasted, clearly proud of his friend's talent.

"Wow, you guys are seriously lucky. This is unbelievably good," you said, reaching for another slider while silently making a mental note to ask Jay for the recipe later.

"Yeah, he's awesome. Next time he cooks something, I'll make sure he saves you a plate," Jake offered, surprising you with his kindness. It felt strange to see him being so nice to you. Maybe Wonyoung was onto something. Perhaps fucking had somehow repaired the relationship between the two of you.

Whatever it was, must have worked its magic again as you once again found yourself in a similar predicament as before. It was unclear how working on the project had escalated to you kneeling on the floor in front of Jake, but neither of you complained.

“Fuck, look at you. So pretty, all on your knees for me.” Jake mused while you looked up at him with wide eyes as your lips wrapped around the tip of his dick.

You could feel his hand resting on the back of your head, slowly guiding you down his length, and once he reached the back of your throat, you could feel your gag reflex kicking in. Undeterred by his size, you started to bob at a slow pace, but once you saw Jake’s response, you felt yourself becoming more determined to make him feel good.

“Shit, you really are a slut aren’t you? Look at you taking everything I’m giving you.” Jake’s hands had now made a makeshift ponytail as he was dragging you up and down his dick with more force than before. You were now basically choking on his cock, yet he seemed to be overtaken by the pleasure to give you any respite.

Tears and spit rolled down your face as you tried to keep up with his pace. Your nose was hitting his pelvis as you were now fully taking his entire length down your throat. His abuse of your throat was making you beyond wet and you reached between your legs, desperate to get yourself off. However, Jake seemed unamused with your act as he harshly yanked your hair back, forcing you off his dick and facing up at him.

“Dumb bitch, you thought you were going to get away with that, didn’t you. Don’t even think about touching yourself, the only way you’re cumming tonight is on my cock.” You whimpered aroused by how roughly he was treating you.

You meekly nod with tears still rolling down your face before he gives your face a couple of taps. “Good girl.” He then pushes you back on his length and continues going back to fucking your face.

Ever since you two first fucked, Jake had been going back in his mind and replaying everything from how you looked in the mirror with his fingers stuffed inside of you to how you looked under him and all he could think about was how he had missed out on capturing those glorious sights. He wanted to be able to go back and take a look at them, forever treasuring those images without them getting hazy in his memory. He, of course, wasn’t going to be making the same mistake twice so while he was pistoning his hip in and out of you, he reached over next to him and grabbed his phone.

From your peripheral, you could see Jake holding something and when you looked up, you were met with the back camera of his phone. Was he videoing you?

At the realization, you once again found yourself fighting the urge to touch yourself. Just the thought of having your dirty acts documented had you going frenzy. Deciding to put on a show, you tried your best to keep your eyes open to look directly into the camera while exaggerating your gags.

Jake moaned loudly before abruptly pulling you off his length. You always had an inkling that Jake was a freak, and continued to prove your assumptions correct as he took ahold of his dick to start smothering your face with it. Your already messy face was now covered all over in the mixture of his precum and spit and it was an absolute filthy picture, and he loved every second of it. You giggled while biting your lip at just imagining how you probably looked from his screen. He continued to tap his length on your face and he couldn’t help but admit how the view from his phone was absolutely pornographic.

After having a bit of fun dragging himself all over your face, making sure that you were covered in him, before he took hold of your hair again and pushed you back down his dick. He gave you no time to recover as he resumed his fast pace. Jake could feel himself already getting close and when you moved your hands to fondle his balls, an instant reaction was triggered out of him.

“Fuck, I’m cumming,” Jake grunted before pushing you all the way down and holding you there, leaving you to struggle with the lack of air. You could feel him spurting himself in your mouth as he kept you in place until he finished. Cum was spilling out from side of your mouth while your eyes were bloodshot from the lack of oxygen.

“Don’t swallow yet, open up,” he instructed and you obliged by opening your mouth wide, looking absolutely filthy with his load inside your mouth. By now, the cum that leaked along with your spit had flowed down to your breasts and Jake groaned again at the sight before moving the camera closer to you to get a good shot of everything.

“Swallow,” and once again you followed his instruction without hesitation before opening your mouth again to show that you had done exactly what he had instructed you to do.

This dynamic between you and Jake was surprisingly working well, and it was no wonder that you found yourselves having sex regularly. Strangely enough, it seemed to have a positive effect on your overall relationship, as the two of you were no longer as antagonistic towards each other as before. In fact, you had been diligently working on your project together and were almost finished, which was quite unexpected considering there were still three weeks left until the deadline. He also resumed being your physics tutor, which you were very much grateful for. Despite its unconventional nature, sex seemed to be working like a miracle for the both of you.

"So, how are things going with Jake?" Winter asked from your bed munching on some trail mix your mom had sent back with you while you were unpacking.

You had just returned from Thanksgiving break, during which most of your time was spent hanging out with your sisters and fucking Jake. You were surprised that no one had caught on to the two of you sneaking off for a quickie in the bathroom during the joint family Thanksgiving dinner, but you certainly weren't complaining. After all, the last thing you wanted was for anyone from either one of your families to find out about the true nature of your newfound amicability.

"What do you mean?" you replied, acting oblivious to Winter's question.

Winter had been extremely skeptical when she first found out about your "situationship" through her roommate, who had learned about it from Wonyoung. Winter, being close friends with Jake, knew his reputation with girls. He was a serial heartbreaker who frankly had a track record of being a dick to girls, and as your big, she was naturally concerned about your well-being. Despite your assurances that the relationship between you and Jake was strictly physical, Winter remained unconvinced. In fact, she even went as far as threatening Jake (and his best friends, much to their girlfriends' dismay, and his little, Niki, who she claimed were collateral) with a baseball bat aimed between his legs. Needless to say, by the end of the night, everyone was in agreement with Winter's wishes.

"Don't act like you don't know what I'm talking about. Are you two still friends with benefits or whatever you guys are doing?" Winter probed, her concern evident in her tone.

You didn't respond immediately, pretending to be occupied with putting away your makeup. In reality, you were deep in thought, trying to figure out how to articulate your answer. It was difficult to classify your relationship with Jake as friends with benefits since you weren't even really friends to begin with.

"Well, yeah, I guess... It's more like acquaintances with benefits, if you want to put a label on it," you finally replied, sensing Winter's lingering disapproval.

"You know I love you, right? I'm sorry if I sound annoying, but I just don't like what's going on. Trust me, I care about Jake, and he's been a great friend to me, but his history with girls is terrible. And let's not forget how he's treated you throughout your life! I just don't want him to use you and leave you hurt. Why can't you two just date? Maybe that would give more weight to your relationship and ensure he's serious about this," Winter's concerns echoed the sentiments she had expressed repeatedly since learning about your relationship.

"No way, that's a terrible idea. We don't even like each other in that way, let alone enough to be actual friends. Plus, he doesn’t have to be serious about this cause there are no feelings involved. Just trust me, Winter. I've got it under control. Don't worry about me," you assured her, unaware that your big's intuition had been spot on. Little did you know that this would mark the beginning of the end.

While frat parties were usually your go-to on weekends, you and your friends were not opposed to hitting up the downtown bars. They offered a different atmosphere compared to house parties, with a more diverse crowd and a wider selection of drinks. Truth be told, there were times when you even preferred the bar scene.

Paradoxx was the hotspot for most undergrads at HybeU, aside from Greek Row, and that's where you found yourself, a few shots deep with your friends. You decided to invite your seatmate, Lily, to join you, and Wonyoung brought along her boyfriend, who in turn brought Niki, Jake's little. Surprisingly, the five of you hit it off remarkably well, dancing and enjoying your drinks.

"Y/N, honestly, when Jungwon first told me we were going out with you, I never expected you to be this fun. Jake kept talking about how you were snobby and had a stick up your ass, but damn, you're actually so much fun," Niki giggled, clearly intoxicated (he was definitely a lightweight despite his height). You couldn't help but laugh at his confession. It was typical of Jake to badmouth you, but you were glad to prove him wrong.

"Aww, thanks, Niki! Honestly, I had no idea what to expect from you just because you are Jake's little, but I'm really glad Jungwon brought you along. We should all definitely go out like this again!" As soon as your words reached his ears, Niki engulfed you in a tight hug, albeit a slightly suffocating one. You had heard from Beomgyu that Niki was probably their most chaotic pledge, and while you could certainly see why, given how unhinged he seemed to be, but you didn't expect him to be such a sweetheart.

"Here you go!" You heard Lily say as she ran up to you while handing you a shot. Wonyoung and Jungwon also trailed behind her holding matching shots in their hands with an extra for Niki. Jungwon had offered to get a round for everyone, and the other two joined in to help carry them back.

With a collective clinking of shot cups, everyone toasted before throwing the tequila back. The familiar burn of the alcohol wasn't exactly pleasant, but in your tipsy state, you couldn't care less.

In contrast to Niki, Jungwon didn't seem as intoxicated. He had his arms wrapped around Wonyoung from behind, wearing the biggest smile you had ever seen. The two of them swayed to the pulsating beat of the bar, and you and Lily couldn't help but coo at their adorableness. Just as Jungwon was about to speak, three strangers abruptly pushed their way into your friend group, interrupting the moment.

"Hey, are you Y/N?" The tallest of the three asked with a smirk on his face. The other two behind him wore similar expressions, making you feel uneasy. Despite your discomfort, you replied.

"Yeah I am, um, sorry, do we know each other?" You and your friends shared confused looks, as none of you seemed to recognize them. However, the three individuals seemed to light up upon confirming their assumption.

"Fuck, me and the boys here are huge fans of your work, man. You're a legend. Daeho over here has been raving about how you should seriously consider going professional." While their words sounded like compliments, their smirks gave off a mocking vibe. Besides, you had no idea what they were talking about, and their presence was making you increasingly uncomfortable. It didn't help that all three of them appeared completely plastered, struggling to maintain their balance.

As always, Wonyoung’s protective nature regarding you kicked in as she spoke up addressing them assertively. "What are you talking about?"

"You know, her little short films!" The three of them erupted into laughter, as if the boy had just cracked the funniest joke ever.

"Wait a minute, I know you guys. You're on the soccer team, right?" Jungwon furrowed his eyebrows, recognizing the three boys who were still recovering from their fit of laughter. Niki also seemed to be putting together where he remembered them from.

"Yup, we are. Who are you?" They asked, but before Jungwon could respond, they redirected their attention back to you. "Why are you acting so shy now? Hey, we're your biggest fans. Shouldn't you be doing something for us? How about a show?"

"What the fuck are you talking about?" You finally snapped, annoyed by their presence.

"Why are you playing dumb? Fuck, you really are a dumb slut, aren't you?" Their words instantly took your breath away. Those were the exact words Jake would use during sex. How did they know?

"Whoa, what the fuck, dude!" Niki intervened, pushing them away from you. The rest of your friends reacted similarly, raising their voices in shock and disbelief at the derogatory comments directed at you.

One of them pushed back against Niki before speaking again. "Don't touch me, you fucker. Besides, it's not like we said anything that wasn't true. You two EpNu boys, right? There's no way you don't know what we're talking about. I bet you guys have some of the exclusives, right? Come on, what did Jake show you guys? Share with the class! Was she on her knees or taking it from behind?" The boys continued their taunting, and it became clear to everyone in your group what they were insinuating.

The room suddenly felt suffocating, and you felt a wave of sickness wash over you. Panic gripped you, and you knew you were on the verge of a panic attack. Desperate to escape, you bolted out of the bar, needing to get away immediately. The thought that Jake had been showing intimate videos of the two of you to others was unbearable. It was a betrayal beyond words. Despite the tumultuous nature of your relationship with Jake, this crossed a line that was incomprehensible to you. It was even more than cruel; it was devastating.

Wonyoung and Lily quickly followed behind you, reaching out to comfort you in your hyperventilating state, attempting to calm you down. However, their comforting words were drowned out by your overwhelming despair. All you could do was cry, confronted with the devastating reality of what had transpired. Winter had been right all along. You were utterly broken, beyond repair, because you had trusted Jake, and you should have listened to her. Now you were left to face the consequences.

TAGLIST: @hsgwrld @matchawhip @chiefturtlebonkghost @bolliwon @cha0thicpisces @chaechae-23 @softiehee @jeonjieun17 @emikisses @ctlvrsworld @starryeyedbabey @yunjardi @hyunjinekoma @jaeyunflix @txtispeng

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