#but I WANT MORE OF THEM 'CAUSE THEY'RE TOO REAL
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tlp jk is def the type to absolutely sob when he sees oc walk down the aisle/when he’s trying to propose to her and it maybe just me but I feel like after that one year anniversary he’s like I’m wifing this girl DOWNN cause I feel like he lich has the ring and everyth ready to go he’s waiting he’s prepped 😭
here it is!!! #thee proposal drabble this is literally the cutest thing ever i wish love was real 😖🥹 hope u enj!!!!!!!!!!
summary: in which jungkook proposes and it doesn't start off well
w/c: 3.7k
warning/s: tlp couple is extremely in love that is a warning. they're also cry babies. listen to something by the beatles for the major feels 😔
“Baby,” Jungkook sighs, matching your pace. “Are we really fighting right now?”
“No.” Is your stern response, continuing your quick steps without even bothering to look back at him.
“I guess we are fighting right now.” Jungkook mumbles to himself, taking two big strides so he can finally catch up with you.
You don’t pay him any attention when he slides his arm around your waist while the other holds the bag of large popcorn you bought a while ago, leaning down to kiss the side of your head. Jungkook doesn’t even care about the people passing by around the cinema; they have lives to care about on their own – he can kiss his girlfriend wherever and whenever he wants.
“I’m sorry.” He whispers in your hair, enough for only you to hear.
There’s a crease on your forehead that hasn’t ceased ever since you left the restaurant you had your dinner at. But after a few beats, you let out a sigh.
“I just really wanted to see the movie in IMAX.” you lament, and Jungkook feels bad. He really does.
“I know, baby, I really am sorry,” he apologizes once again. “We can see it tomorro—” but he realizes you both have a full-time shift, so he opts for, “–next week?”
“Jungkook, the screening ends in the next two days.” you say, tone bordering on annoyed now. You reel it back in, gently saying, “I just– I told you to hurry up earlier, but you kept on changing your hair even though– you know what, forget about it. Which cinema were we in, again?”
Jungkook’s nerves begin to kick in, because you look like you’re genuinely upset now. He can tell it by the tone of your voice, the disappointment and the simmering irritation of having to deal with the situation. You don’t get angry often – no scratch that, you don’t get angry at all. However, it does come in withdrawal-like gestures and behavior – like now.
And again, Jungkook really does feel bad for having to do what he did earlier. You weren’t able to purchase tickets online so you had to make do with buying on the actual booth – and because Jungkook took way too long in the comfort room of the restaurant fixing his hair, you arrived at the cinema way too late and the tickets for the last IMAX screening of the night ran out. It left you with no choice but to go with the regular one instead, and needless to say, you’re not at all that happy about that.
Well, shit. Jungkook thinks. This date is not going well at all. The waitress at the restaurant you ate at a while ago openly flirted with him on your table and he was too stunned to do something that you had to tell her off by yourself. That had obviously taken a hit on your mood, and the cinema thing just kind of maybe amplified it and Jungkook thinks he’s beginning to get fucked.
“I’ll make up it up to you, baby–”
“The tickets, Jungkook.”
Jungkook purses his lips into a thin line and gives them to you.
You walk alongside each other quietly, but Jungkook doesn’t let go of your waist while you head towards the dark and quiet hallway, leading to the seats. You don’t pry his hand off so maybe – maybe – that’s a good thing.
But god, this night isn’t going well like he wanted it to be. Suddenly, he’s nervous again. More nervous that he was in the shower awhile ago when you were still prepping for the date back at home. He’s anxious about fucking the whole thing up, and sure, he could trust his track record of never fucking up when it comes to doing big things in his life, but this is different. This will be different. And he’s just so fucking scared that he checks on his watch again.
8:22pm.
Eight minutes before the movie starts in your cinema. And eight minutes more before the–
“Jungkook,” You call him, and he’s just in the middle of pushing the seat down for you when you do so. He looks at you. Confused, you ask, “Do you have somewhere to go?”
“Huh?”
“You keep on looking at your watch. You have been since we were at the restaurant.”
Jungkook’s eyes widen and he’s thankful there’s barely any lights in the hall.
“I– no. No.” He shakes his head, placing down the bag of popcorn in the middle and takes your hand instead, interlocking your fingers. “I’m sorry, did I keep doing that?” He asks consciously.
He’s really fucking this up, and you’re noticing it.
“Yes, it’s bothering me a little,” You shuffle in your seat a little, facing Jungkook. Softly, you ask, “Do you wanna go home? We can ditch the movie. I’m sorry for being a dickhead the whole night. It’s not an excuse but I really wanted to watch this movie in IMAX… but it’s fine. I’m not mad at you. I’m just in a… mood. And I know I’m taking it out on you. I’m sorry. I’m being so unappreciative over here – I know you were supposed to work on your research–”
“Hey,” Jungkook stops you before you can even finish that. “No, baby. This is our date. I don’t wanna go home yet and I’m genuinely really sorry for missing the IMAX screening.” He’d add he didn’t mean to take long in the comfort room earlier… but that would be a lie. He intended to do that so you can both arrive here on time like planned.
You purse your lips into a thin line. “Still… I’m sorry for being a little bitch.”
“Not true. You’re an angel.” Jungkook says and brings your interlocked hands up to kiss your knuckles. “Love you.”
You frown. “Love you too.”
That earns you a hearty chuckle from him. “I love you more.”
“Not that again.” You sigh, turning sideways to look ahead on the screen but not breaking away from his hold.
Jungkook contains his smile as his gaze falls to the big screen as well, nerves crumbling down a little at the exchange. You’re the only person who can make him nervous but the only one who can take it away at the same time.
“Huh,” you utter suddenly in the middle of some trailer playing. “It’s so weird there’s only a few people here.”
At that, Jungkook’s heart rate picks up a bit. “Y-yeah? Well, it’s late at night.”
“Fair.”
“And this movie’s not really new, right? Just an anniversary screening thing.” Jungkook continues to add, as if determined to justify your claim.
You nod. “I guess you’re right.”
“Yep.”
His phone lights up and you’re busy sipping on your drink so Jungkook takes that as an opportunity to check the messages he received.
tae [8:28pm]: starting in 2
tae [8:28pm]: good luck buddy
Jungkook swipes his tongue over his lips – a nervous habit – quickly turning it off and pocketing the device. He places his arm on the arm rest and taps his fingers on the plastic surface anxiously.
It feels like there’s a ticking clock above his head when the trailer finally ends, because he knows the thing should start rolling.
And Jungkook swears he’s prepared for this for so many weeks. Months for the matter. It’s now May and the ring has been bought since February. What was once tucked away from the depths of his closet is now snugged in the pockets of his trouser, deep enough that you couldn’t pinpoint the bulging outline of the box.
Jungkook originally planned for you both to be out of the country when he does it. But things got really hectic at the hospital and while he personally could’ve still taken a leave, you couldn’t. Jungkook brought up the idea of vacationing a little, “Just for a week,”, he said, but then you sadly told him that you couldn’t even if you wanted to and he understood that greatly. He’s in the same line of work, after all.
So, with what seemed to be the nth deliberation with Doyeon, Taehyung, and Nayeon, he ultimately decided on this set-up. You know; trick you into going to the mall with him so you can pass by the cinema and he successfully executes the proposal seamlessly. But obviously, it didn’t go as smoothly as that.
After your dinner, you impulsively decided that you wanted to watch a movie in IMAX, but it starts at exactly as Jungkook’s proposal, and so he had to compromise a little bit; the admittedly poor (but effective) solution coming in the form of intentionally staying a little longer in the comfort room of the restaurant just so you two would be lat.
And Jungkook swears it’s for a good reason! Because everything’s prepped and ready to roll and he can’t have himself waste another perfect opportunity. He remembers almost popping the question three months ago, two months ago, month ago, few weeks ago and heck, even last night – but he’d always get cold feet and think the time wasn’t right.
Right now, though, is different.
And he wants it so badly to be different.
Good thing you settled things quickly. Now that his being late is past you, he can be a little more confident in what he’s about to do.
The next trailer shows up and Jungkook sits upright, knowing what’s coming. He has it memorized, down to each frame. He was the one who edited it, after all, a product of his humble multimedia skills, that is. Jungkook could’ve gone to a professional but he really wanted to do it himself, scared they wouldn’t be able to tell you what he wanted to. And so he did. The gang also told him that it would be better if he did it himself.
And now he’s showing it to you – you, who’s completely clueless beside him.
It starts as a bit of a misdirect. There’s an intro from a famous movie studio, and a scene from a real movie – and so of course you don’t suspect anything, as Jungkook could say from his peripheral view.
Suddenly, the screen goes black. It causes a pregnant pause, stretched to exactly five seconds (again, Jungkook edited that), and then, a familiar clip suddenly plays.
It’s a video of you taken from Jungkook’s camcorder back in med school. First year, around the second semester. You were at Moon’s Printing Shop and you were looking down at your notes when Jungkook, behind the camera, called your name.
You looked up, hair messy from an all-nighter study but Jungkook’s certain the Jungkook behind the scene was still thinking you were the prettiest girl he’s ever seen just like he’s thinking now.
“Who would you wanna be if you were given the chance to be somebody else in your next life?”
You grimace. “Hopefully, still me.”
“So boring,” Jungkook exaggerated, his laughter reverberating in the hall of the theater. “Be serious.”
You looked flustered in the video. “I’m serious. I don’t wanna be somebody else.”
In his seat, Jungkook feels the real you sitting beside him tugging at your enclosed hands together, so he looks at you.
“Jungkook, what is this?” You say, evidently unaware of what’s currently happening, your brows furrowed in that cute confusion.
“Just something I’ve been working on for the past three months.” he smiles, bringing your hands together to his lips again. He just couldn’t stop kissing and touching you even if he tries.
You stare at him with your mouth agape, but you don’t say anything else, your gaze falling back to the screen once again.
“Okay, since you don’t wanna play this game I wanna be Darth Vader.” Jungkook said in the video.
“What? The evil guy from Star Wars?” You frowned. “That’s not… hmm… okay. I guess I wanna be… Spongebob, then.”
“Oh. Wow. Interesting. Alright, Darth Vader’s out. I wanna be Patrick instead.”
“I like that. So we’ll still be bestfriends, right?”
“Yeah. And I still get to stress you out even in the next life.”
That made you laugh, the warm burst of laughter filling the hall which makes Jungkook’s lips curl up as he watches the screen. He can never get tired of it; your smile, your laugh, your face as it lights up. There’s something so incredibly angelic about you he sometimes thinks you’re not human at all. Or maybe just part-human… nonetheless, he feels grateful. For literally everything.
Something in the way she moves…
The video transitions to another reel of you taken by Jungkook while The Beatles’ Something plays in the background.
"Oh my god..." Jungkook hears you gasp beside him, but he doesn't allow himself to break just yet. Instead, he tightens his grip on your hand, feeling your response as you hold on just as firmly.
The screen continues to show candid moments of you from med school. All recorded and taken by Jungkook; the trips you took during that time, that rave party you went to where you got extremely drunk – and when that showed up, you giggled beside him and said, “I told you to delete that.”, which he just laughed at.
Later on, the clips got more recent, you in your lilac dress and Jungkook’s white tux… it was a video of you dancing in Nayeon’s wedding.
“W-wha–… I didn’t – who took that?” You whisper, sounding in awe.
“Nayeon was apparently recording from the stage at that time.” Jungkook says, looking at you and smiling when he sees that you have your eyes glued to the screen.
“This is so…” you trail off, but you don’t really say anything in continuation.
Recent videos of you play, capturing moments from the two years you’ve been together. There’s that clip in Vienna, a few in Florence, Paris, Melbourne... It’s surreal to think that he captured those memories, never imagining they’d be used for something like this.
Something in the way she knows
And all I have to do is think of her
Something in the things she shows me
I don't want to leave her now
You know I believe and how
The song fades to an end and so did the compilation of your videos. The screen shows Jungkook this time instead. He leaned towards the camera, checked the optics, and then smiled a little. From the background, you know it was taken by the wall of his room, near the window because you can see the Sanrio plushie you put on the table beside there. It’s a little out of frame but you can still recognize it.
Then, he spoke.
“Uhm, hi,” He started, and you hold your breath, feeling like you’re on the edge of your seat but not in that anxious way. “I don’t really know where I’m going with this. I’m thinking of doing this video… for my proposal – and ah, my proposal – wait, I really should’ve written a script for this but I wanted this to be natural as much as possible and I’m going off-track so we’ll move on to what I really wanna say,”
You can’t help but laugh at that, and you hear Jungkook joining in with you.
“__, you’re the love of my life. You’re my lover, but you’re my best friend most of all. I look back on the times we’ve spent together – a decade. There was no time in those years that I didn’t thank my lucky stars for knowing and meeting you. You’re the best thing that ever happened to me, and I really hope you know how much I love you because no matter how hard I try to put it into action and words, no amount of it would tell you how I truly feel.” A pause. Then he took out something from his pocket. Raising his hand, a red velvet box appeared in the frame. He was about to open it when suddenly, your voice is heard behind the camera.
“Jungkook?”
Jungkook quickly pocketed the box, and the camera shook a little, the angle now distorted, probably due to his panic upon hearing your voice.
“Yes, baby?” The audio played.
“You were doing something?”
“Nah. Just trying out my new camera.” Jungkook said.
“Oh. Lemme see.”
The camera got picked up, and Jungkook switched the camera to you.
In your seat, you nibble on your bottom lip upon seeing your own face this time, a poor attempt to stop your jaw from breaking apart because you couldn’t stop yourself from smiling watching the whole thing.
“Pretty girl.” You hear Jungkook say behind the recorder. His hand came up to caress your face in the video, thumb rubbing over your cheek. “I love you.”
You looked confused at first but then you told him, anyway, “I love you too.”
You leaned down, and the video gets switched out to another one of Jungkook on a different day.
“Sorry the video got interrupted by my gorgeous girlfriend.”
You both laugh at that, and as if on cue, your eyes meet – silently acknowledging that you’re thinking the same thing. In that shared glance, it's clear you both understand how things escalated in that moment, that night – how that kiss turned into something more.
“I just wanted to say that, uh, I love her. No, you, I’m talking to you–” He sighed in the clip, and you can’t help but chuckle. “Anyway. I love you. I love you so much, baby. More than anything else in the world. I feel like I don’t say it enough although Taehyung teases me about convulsing if I can’t say it to you for no longer than five minutes – he’s probably right but that’s not the point. What I wanna say is – again – is that, I love you, __. And I want to spend the rest of my lifetime with you. I wanna grow old with you. Spend every day and every night with you. I want us to wake up together every morning, make our breakfast together, go to work together, do laundry together, our taxes – man, I don’t know. Anything. I just want to do anything and everything with you. Maybe adopt a dog in the near future, if you want to, that is. You’re probably gonna be watching this in the theater by this moment – god I hope I don’t fuck the whole thing up, the gang is gonna be so pissed – but I’ll drop the question for you and I know we already talked about it many times before and two months ago you said you were ready if I was also ready. I couldn’t tell you I’ve been ready since the first week we started dating. But I hope… what you felt two months ago is still what you feel right now…”
Then, the big screen fades to black, and suddenly, a few lights in the hall flicker on, illuminating Jungkook—now on his knees. In his hand is a red velvet box, now open, revealing a stunning ring that’s so beautiful it leaves your jaw slack.
He clears his throat. “__, you’re my best friend. Have been and always will be. You’re my home, my partner. I will love you for as long as you let me and–” Jungkook doesn’t mean it but there’s suddenly a lump in his throat that forms along the way and he has to choke it back, making his voice crack a little bit as he looks into your eyes. “– and I really want to live all my remaining years with you and be yours forever.” He bites his lip, looks up at you with those doe eyes you love so much. Then, the question comes, “Can I be your husband?”
“Jungkook…” You look down at him, your mouth opening and closing, lost for words. You’ve passed the point of holding back tears, and when your eyes meet his—so full of sincerity and revere—you completely break. “Y-yes. Yes! One hundred percent yes,” you manage to say through your sobs, nodding fervently as your vision blurs from the tears streaming down your face.
As soon as you say that, all the lights in the room turn on and there’s a holler from the direction of the projection room that you can’t help but look at.
“Congrats!”
You gasp as you see Doyeon and Nayeon. They’re both waving at you with huge grins on their faces. Genuinely surprised and confused at the same time, you start to look around, and suddenly, you realize that everybody is literally… your family. Taehyung, your dad, your mom, your sister and Seokjin all occupy the front rows, and in front of them are Jungkook’s own family as well. From afar, you see Jungkook’s father coming up to give your dad a hug which he reciprocates as they laugh together.
Your eyes are drawn back to Jungkook.
“Jungkook… they’re all here,” you say, struggling to hold back the onslaught of tears. They won’t stop.
And at this point, Jungkook can’t help it. Not anymore. He sees you crying and he can’t help but do it as well. He sniffs, taking your hand and kissing the back of your palm.
“Yes, baby. Everybody is here.”
“Baby, why are you crying?” You ask him despite yourself.
Jungkook chuckles in between his tears, swiping a hand on his eyes. “I’m just so happy. You make me so happy. Thank you. Thank you for saying yes.”
That makes you cry even more, earning another laugh from Jungkook but it’s filled with endearment. Slowly, he takes your hand and you watch teary-eyed as he finally inserts the ring around your ring finger.
The diamond-encrusted band, with a larger diamond glimmering in the center, fits perfectly around your finger. You stare at it in awe, admiring how gorgeous it looks—trying to recall a time when Jungkook measured your finger to make it fit so flawlessly. But you can't remember, and you don't mind at all, instead looking up at him as he stands to his feet.
"I love you, Jungkook. I really do," you say with all the sincerity in your heart, hoping he knows as much.
"I can't wait to marry you," he replies, his voice full of emotion before he pulls you into his arms and leans down to kiss you gently on the lips. It’s soft and it’s sweet just like the love he’s given you all these years.
A cheer erupts around you, and normally, you'd feel shy about kissing in front of your family. But this time, you don’t feel embarrassed at all.
It’s just you and Jungkook. Bound for a lifetime of unadulterated love.
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Things I would've liked to see in Arcane S2, in no particular order:
Caitlyn doing some more heinous shit after becoming dictator. Let her be evil, damnit! Let her fuck up the Firelights' sanctuary to achieve whatever goal! Make some people mad!
More of a sense of the power struggle between Ambessa and Caitlyn. Let Caitlyn look into the disappearances as well, or at least give us a sense of what she thinks is going on. Maybe give Shoola something to do after even Salo left. Make the upper class of Piltover feel more alive.
Give Caitlyn the initiative in her turn away from Ambessa, mirror Vi choosing to trust Jinx while facing to Warwick here, and have it take a little more to get them on the same page.
Let Ekko and Jinx actually rally Zaun in the final act. The way they're seen by their people was a pretty big deal, and I would've liked to see that go somewhere in the climax.
Actually, have Zaun actually discuss what to do in the Noxus/Piltover war. Both sides oppressed Zaun pretty badly, so maybe there's some people who want to support Noxus (a very small group), or who figure they're happy to let their enemies fight it out. Let Sevika, Scar and the Jinxers about this.
Hell, let Sevika show up at all after episode 4! Isha was important to her too! Have her and Jinx suggest building a statue for her, like Silco did for Vander, as another notch to help Jinx stand upright.
When Jayce and Mel come back, have them reckon with what Caitlyn did to their city, and have them take some time to forge the place back together.
Let Zaun negotiate with Piltover for their aid! Give them more than just one seat on the council amongst people who already look down on them (although I think Sevika is canny enough to get the most out of it, it's a real consolation price for a group of people willing to abandon their own homies to rally to the defense of yours), and make Ekko a prominent voice here.
Warwick in episode 9 didn't really do much for me. Any of the emotional beats there were already covered in episode 6. Not sure what to do with him instead, though. Maybe make Vi and Jinx protect others from him more explicitly?
By emphasising the Piltover/Zaun conflict more, you can have Vi be more conflicted about where she falls on that divide.
Ambessa also lobbies to get Zaun on board, maybe pulls some Renni shenanigans again. Actually get me invested in that grand climax.
Same goes for Viktor, honestly. Maybe give his conversation with Mel and Jayce a bit more weight. His turn to Ambessa and Singed's side is a bit abrupt (and also very much caused by Jayce killing him, so his moral high ground in that conversation is a bit weird).
Don't make Jayce talk shit about Viktor's terminal illness, goddamnit. Heimerdinger's whole arc was about how corrosive that attitude was, and the conclusion of it was that you can't sit down on your laurels because change will keep happening with or without you. I think that makes for a much more compelling argument against Viktor's philosophy at this point.
No notes on Singed. What a ledge.
Overall, I think the show needed a bit more breathing room to build up to the level the climax was operating on. It left a bit too much of what I cared about behind to get there, and adding an act could've been a way to alleviate some of that.
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How to Write Emotional Dialogue Without Being "Cringy"
Did you ever want to write an emotional scene between characters but suddenly felt so conflicted because you're worried it might seem cringe? I, for one, have (and still do) worried about this! So today, I'll share some tips on how to make your dialogue LESS cringy and MORE emotional!
But for starters, what exactly makes something "cringe"?
Our media actually plays a big part in shaping what we find to be cringe, so certain words or phrases tend to stick out to us as "cringe". But when it comes to writing, it depends mainly on the context given.
So, with that being said, something that's meant to be emotional might seem cringy and awkward because the scene falls flat. Now that you understand the base cause of this, let's explore some ways to avoid it!
>>> OMIT, DON'T SAY
If you ever found yourself writing out a line that, no matter what, still seems awkward, then the problem may lie in the line itself. Sometimes it's unnecessary to say everything; your readers are smarter than you might think! There's a lot you can omit in dialogue while still maintaining a natural feel, whether it be through body language or hidden meanings behind certain words!
EX:
Prompt: "You're so fake, you think you can hide from the world, but you can't. What if someone finds out the real you?"
"I'll just put on another mask."
V.S
"What do you think?"
Regardless of whether you find the first response cringe or not, you can also see that the alternative response hints at a similar answer despite not confirming or denying anything!
>>> BE BRIEF
Unless your character is ranting or you're strategically elongating their dialogue, try to keep their lines concise. Many people will speak briefer as a result of uncomfortableness, sadness, and/or anger.
If a piece of longer dialogue looks odd to you in a certain situation, that might be because your character seems to be trying to explain something too much when it wasn't your intention to create that effect. Filler words (uh, um, oh,) are fine because they're a part of natural speech, but sometimes it's better to get straight to the point!
>>> FILLERS
Speaking of filler words, they can become really useful when writing emotional dialogue because they can portray a variety of emotions! (They can depict feelings of anxiousness, sadness, and more.) Additionally, stutters and ellipsis are helpful for the same reason! Overall, these incorporations really spice things up! Unnaturalness can be a cause for cringiness, and fillers assist in making dialogue feel more natural!
>>> ITALICS FOR RANTS
Okay, but what about rants and purposefully long dialogue? How do we make these more meaningful when essentially, we're just talking about big blobs of text?
Here, it's important to add dynamic to catch the reader's attention. When we read, it's like a voice is talking in our heads, and the voice is ultimately determined by subtleties like italics!
So, with that being said, use italics (I suggest incorporating them regularly, actually) when writing LONG texts! It creates a flow and rhythm for our reading, and most importantly, adds emotional weight to certain words/phrases, which highlights what your character prioritizes and cares about most!
EX: "I-I thought we promised! You said you wouldn't leave--so why are you leaving now? Was it my mistake? I'll change, I swear! (etc...)"
V.S
"I-I thought we promised! You said you wouldn't leave--so why are you leaving now? Was it my mistake? I'll change, I swear! (etc...)"
See? With just a few italicizes here and there (although you do want to be strategic about which ones you italicize), the simple dialogue quickly grew more weighted!
>>> DON'T RE-READ TOO SOON
In the end, the most effective way to tell whether something is cringy or not is to have someone else read it and tell you! But if you don't like the sound of that and prefer to check on your own, I suggest to not re-read your dialogue over and over. Instead, give it some time!
When we re-read our work too soon, we already know what to expect, which influences our decision making and opinions. By approaching it after you refreshed your brain, it'll feel more like you're reading it for the first time; and therefore, you'll form more effective ideas!
***
Still, it's also important to keep in mind that something that's cringe to you won't be cringe to someone else and vice versa! It's ultimately based on the readers, which we have no choice but to accept. However, if you were concerned about your writing because of such reasons, I hope this has helped!
Happy writing~
3hks <3
#writeblr#writing#writerscommunity#creative writing#writing inspo#writing tips#writing advice#how to write dialogue#how to write emotional dialogue#how to write emotional dialogue that's not cringe#how to avoid cringe writing#tips on avoiding cringe writing#advice on avoiding cringe writing
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lawyer Regulus Black?
writers i gift unto you this idea. someone who knows something about the law please write this cause i don't know shit and i really don't want to do the research, i'll end up studying for the bar. the adhd is WILD.
Regulus "law is a gentleman's profession" Black. Lawyer Regulus Black with a fantastic excuse to wear very expensive perfectly tailored suits every day. who definitely came from money and took advantage with the best schools, a comfortable home etc, but now takes pride in NOT living off the Black fortune, thank you very much. he's still working through some of his privilege.
Regulus Black as a prosecutor who is absolutely out for blood against anyone hurting the vulnerable. he could be rather disapproving of his wild older sibling's best friend. he knows Siri is the more reckless of that pair but they egg each other on! they're going to get into real trouble one day...
Divorce lawyer Regulus Black who is so comforting and kind and thoughtful behind closed doors and absolutely terrifying in the courtroom.
Autistic lawyer Regulus Black who loves the order and rules of the court, and that (hopefully, maybe, generally) we're trying to do the right thing. it doesn't always work but it's all we have, really. lawyer Regulus Black who was raised to work within the system. with some pretty grey morals that he works on over time.
Defense lawyer Regulus Black who really does think everyone deserves a fair trial and representation. one of the few who still say that with real sincerity. he could meet the rest of the skittles more easily that way, be they other lawyers or defendants.
Slightly corrupt lawyer Regulus Black? perhaps finding his way back to being a good person or perhaps pushed into the corruption? AU with the black family having their fingers in the muggle world and its political powers and courts. pick any country you like for this really
Trans Regulus Black who took the education and ran away now that he could take care of himself. transitioning away from his parents and living totally separately, meeting up years later for some legal matter and they don't recognize him at all. but now he's done the therapy work and isn't scared of them any more. Regulus telling the court officer to please make sure Walburga and Orion aren't regularly interacting with any children because he is a mandatory reporter isn't he? "you see now she's scared. cause I know everything about you and I don't owe you loyalty any more"
please take this idea and run with it. i'm already a reggie kinnie but my anxiety is too high and my adhd too bad to end up studying law and that's how i research as a writier
#marauders#regulus black#jegulus#starchaser#sirius black#slytherin skittles#trans regulus#autistic regulus black#sunseeker#james x regulus#jegulus microfic#jegulus fanfiction#regulus x james
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About the latest polemic about Zayne and Sylus over twitter...
I left twitter for good. I'm honestly so tired of the drama that arises there everyday. I literally decided to log in today just to see some Arcane spoilers and the first thing I was hit with was with the most recent drama about CN players and specially Zayne and Sylus players having a heavy argument about plagiarism and how some lines of Zayne seem to have been copied onto Sylus' lines...
Firs of all, I don't know how the CN fanbase is, so I can't really say anything about that matter. From what I read, it seems things are quite complex there and arguments & harassment among LI's fanbases seem to be quite intense from what ppl is saying but, again, I can't really say too much on that matter cause I don't know how the fanbase is there, I'm not part of it neither I go to CN websites to look up for lads content. Most cases my experience visiting CN websites has been because of kind ppl that has respectfully asked me permission to repost my art and give me credits there, from that perspective my opinion about the CN fanbase has always been good and it still stands, I'm pretty sure that great part of the fanbase it's nice and it's only the small little toxic portion that is overshadowing the nice and chill part of the fandom.
My point here it's: Don't let yourself to have a tunnel vision about this situation.
You can probably see 10, 100 or even 500 ppl arguing and harassing others and even so it's not even a quarter of the whole total of players that belong to the fandom only in China, let alone global. To generalize from your point of view is not the objective take you think it is, talking from your experience doesn't talk for others experience, no one's experience here is universal. I read a lot of ppl trying to find someone to blame all the time "Zayne players started everything" "Sylus writers copied Zayne" etc and you know? Rolling this ball to one another is not going to lead us anywhere because as always, it's not acknowledging the true issue here: that is, us as players, keep enabling this kind of toxic behaviour if that means to stand up for or to 'defend' our main LI.
To try to portray one LI's fanbase as the guilty one is just creating more trouble than solving it and it's also not having a general understanding of the situation at hand and instead, encouraing biased opinions that only create more division and discrimination within the fandom.
And let's be honest, it's not the first time (and probably won't be the last, sadly) that drama arises within the fandom where we attack others LIs and their fanbase. This game is targeted towards adult women, we are not supposed to behave like adolescents making tantrums and messing up with our peers, yet here we are, enabling arguments, harassment, bullying or overall having an ugly and mean attitude in order to defend something that honestly, all the LIs would feel ashamed for if they were real. Like, literally all of them hate to be on the spotlight for the stuff they're good at, it would be even worse if the spotlight it's caused by them for all the wrong reasons.
I know lads guys are fictional, and I'm not going to invalidate people's feelings by saying that you shouldn't take it too seriously just bc they're not real -most of us find a lot of comfort in fiction, after all- but that doesn't give you the right to harass real people neither hurt their feelings [the same ways you feel when they attack your fav LI]. You are able to feel whatever you want to feel, however, you're still responsible for your words and actions. If this game is turning you into an awful person, then I'm afraid to say that you probably must step back and reconsider if your passion for it is healthy for you.
I know it's easy to get upset and sometimes we have the need to express it. However, to decide to be a part of a fandom is to accept that you are not going to always like what ppl say, let alone agree with them. Not everyone's opinions might aling with yours but it's enterily up to you the way how you take and respond to them. As I said before, I left twitter for good bc I found myself often wanting to be mean to others upon reading the negative stuff some ppl said about Zayne, especially in order to compare him with other LIs just to make him look bad. I would often felt so ugly thinking like that. Staying away from that drama has been super helpful and that's the best advice I can give for now: try and enjoy the game and your LI by yourself if the fandom is getting too much to handle.
Be careful about the discourse you support and always ask yourself if your words and actions will truly lead you somewhere good and healthy or it will only cause more chaos for you and others. Flammable opinions only light up and burn if we feed the fire, if there's no one to keep it alive, the flame will drown out very quickly.
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Have a pile of Alagadda headcanons:
Being interested in bugs, all the references to the citizens of Alagadda being chitinous, and SCP-6624 giving the Yellow Lord a centipede theme, I tend to lean in on the whole insect thing. Alagaddans aren't insects, mind, I just take various inspirations from insects.
There's a fairly strict caste system but it's like insect castes - an Alagaddan is made for a role and plays it. The colour of the Alagaddan has no bearing on caste, role, or job.
The Hanged King
Not a victim, or if it is, it did it to itself For Unknowable Eldritch Reasons.
The Humours love their weird King, despite it being a silent cosmic horror.
Has A Plan called the Grand Play but nobody knows what it is. Ambassador thinks it knows but it's being played like everyone else.
The Ambassador
Not a native Alagaddan. The King found it or called it in from somewhere else.
Considers itself in charge. King don't care.
Basically serves as the eyes and hands of the King, going places and making deals and killing people. King's busy being eldritch.
If a tourist is causing trouble or snooping around, it's probably the Ambassador who's going to deal with them.
You can run but you can't hide.
The Humours / Lords
The first Alagaddans. Maybe the King's humours made into people? Many stories about their origins, possibly all true.
Primary duty is providing emotion for the King, either through advice or sharing experiences telepathically.
Other duties are performing rituals, making bodies for citizens, overseeing parties, and keeping order.
Mostly they just mess around doing whatever.
Can change shape by ripping off their mask and creating a new body.
Believe that the Ambassador should rank below them.
Pets
Probably have a better name but I'll figure it out some other time.
Created by a Humour for a specific task, like the Maestro of Rancour (SCP-6624-2) or the Magistrate of Duty (OC).
Courtiers
Live in the palaces and tend directly to the Humours.
Duties generally involve running errands, carrying stuff around, passing messages to other Humours, acting in a lady's maid capacity, and being on-call when a Humour is horny.
They wander around the palaces so while, for example, you'll find mostly red-clad courtiers in the Red Lord's palace, there will be other colours hanging around as well.
Servants
Anyone with a Real Job, working under a supervisor or not.
Someone has to make the wine and snacks and clothes and musical instruments and clean up after everyone else and sell things to tourists.
The servants in the King's Palace are mind-shattered husks, having spent too much time around the King.
'Musician' and 'entertainer' and 'artist' the like aren't jobs in Alagadda any more than breathing is a job on Earth. All Alagaddans sing and dance and entertain, it's as much a part of them as their masks.
Revellers
Your basic Alagaddan.
They're the ones partying in the streets, roaming around and pulling whoever they encounter into the Carnival.
They're the audience for any official plays or concerts or whatnot.
They seem to have the least going on in their heads. They are the Crowd, the Ensemble, the And Company.
Peasants
Pretty sure they're mostly revellers who either think too much or got tired of 24/7 partying and want to do their own thing but don't want to actually leave Alagadda so they go live in the outskirts.
Or maybe people who had their role stripped from them.
The lords leave them alone to Serve As An Example.
They do not go to the palaces.
Soldiers
They're off trying to cause incursions into other realities. They wait on the far side of SCP-5501, they fight at SCP-6034, but there's not many in the city itself.
If someone's causing trouble in Alagadda, they'll probably just get dismembered by whoever's closest.
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I meant the isekai x self-aware fic with the team that you would never fight. I love it and want to see a part 2 of it. (sorry if I worded my previous ask incorrectly and confused you into thinking I was talking about another fic!)
OH- Butterfly- be more specific next time. I got around 3 different self-aware crk au's going on and you ought to specify which one you're referring to. I'm gonna mix them up if you don't T T Anyways, part two coming right up
Previous part
The ball's in your court pt2
While the battle between the heroes and Shadow Milk cookie raged on, Y/N cookie was just chilling with the kids and watching from the side eating popcorn (From where? nobody knows). The fight was pretty much still a 50/50 battle since neither team was taking enough damage for defeat. When did Shadow Milk cookie become THIS resilient??? Oh well, provided you got the healers doing their job and everyone else is holding up it would be fine.
Gingerbrave: So...
Strawberry cookie: The baker, hm?...
Wizard cookie: I thought you'd be bigger...
Y/N cookie: the feeling is mutual. And take as much time as you need to come to terms with it.
Strawberry cookie: And those cookies- the ones you brought to fight. Are... they the really like the ones we know? As in- the white lily cookie and dark cacao cookie. I don't know who the other two are.
Y/N cookie: Yes and no. Unlike the cookies of this universe, these ones are solely brought in to fight the enemy on my command. And if they crumble it's not a permanent death. They'll always come back provided I choose to use them for battle again. And even if I don't, they're on standby. Though I don't exactly think I'll need to put any of them on the bench with how well the battle is going.
Y/N cookie looks back at the fight, which hasn't calmed down in the slightest. But at least they were slowly getting the upper hand. The three other cookies looked at each other before looking at the baker.
Wizard cookie: So you're saying that anyone you choose to fight for you can and will appear?
Y/N cookie: Yeah, but that'll probably only be possible once I beat this boss or they lose.
Gingerbrave: Wow! This is so cool! It's like some awesome video game in real life!
Y/N cookie:... riiiiiiiiiiiight......
Strawberry cookie: I have a question.
Y/N cookie: Ask away.
Strawberry cookie: Earlier you said something about... Elder Faerie crumbling?... I-is that really gonna happen?
Y/N cookie: Uhh
Wizard cookie: Oh so I wasn't the only one who heard that.
Y/N cookie: Well-
Gingerbrave: Wait- he's gonna crumble?! When?!
Y/N cookie: Ok just calm down so I can speak, geez!
All three cookies go silent, looking up at Y/N cookie with visible concern as they sigh.
Y/N cookie: So originally, he supposed to die. I'm not gonna go into too much detail cuz that's way too many spoilers but yeah, he dies. I was admittedly hoping it wouldn't come to that since a whole lot of dialogue was changed, but I guess there odds of the story changing were pretty low.
Gingerbrave: W-when does it happen?! Maybe we can stop it?!
Y/N cookie: Considering how long the fight's been going I'd say right about-
Just then there was a yell of pain from the battle grounds, causing all the cookies to look at the source. Surprise surprise, Elder faerie was dying.
Y/N cookie: Now...
The four went to the scene. (skipping the whole using the guardians strength part because it's gonna take forever for me to finish this story if I don't.)
Y/N cookie: Can't you heal him or something, Mystic flour cookie?
Mystic flour cookie: No.
Y/N cookie: Why not-
Mystic flour cookie: I'm not about to interfere with a canon event.
Y/N cookie: Ah- fair.
Burning Spice cookie: And so the old fool dies. And yet, I still feel nothing.
Y/N cookie: Wait is that a ref-
White Lily cookie: WHY ARE YOU GUYS SO NOCHALANT ABOUT THIS?! I JUST BECAME A GUARDIAN FOR TREES SAKE!
Moonflower Faerie: You'll get over it.
White Lily cookie: Wait- really?
Moonflower faerie: No- that's gonna haunt you for weeks to come, trust me.
White Lily cookie: oh-
Dark Cacao cookie (Dragon lord): Now, let us make haste and seal that wretched beast once and for all.
Y/N cookie: He's gonna be back in- like, Beast yeast episode 7
Burning spice + Mystic flour: What?-
Y/N cookie: Nothing- let's just go!
#crk#cookie run kingdom#cr kingdom#crk x reader#burning spice cookie#cookie run#mystic flour cookie#shadow milk cookie#white lily cookie#pure vanilla cooke#gingerbrave#strawberry cookie#wizard cookie#awakened dark cacao
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"shifting isn't real, you're all delusional" jokes on you! Reality shifting methods and such have HELPED ME COPE with my delusional disorders!!
Ex; preventing paranoid spirals into the delusions I have becoming/feeling Too Real and fucking Horrifying at times by shifting normalizing the thought of 1; everything is infinite, it's a common idea that we are CONSTANTLY shifting through different realities, and with that thought, the thought of being "not real, merely a character in someone else's mind" has also become normalized to me with the thought of; what if this world was created via someone thinking of an ideal place they wanted, and shifting Here? What if my delusions were somehow correct? Oddly enough to me, that is reassuring, as I'd finally have a Solid Fucking Answer, and alongside that; it's a fact that in the realities we make and shift to, everyone is still REAL!! Even IF the former idea that we were all created by the consciousness of someone else were true, that doesn't devalue or degrade our Reality as living breathing organisms with Real Lives.
Ex2; somatic cotards delusion is a delusional disorder where you feel you are legitimately dead/you died in the past at one point and are still here somehow/etc, my personal experience is that I believe I caused my own death at some point at a very very very young age and respawned or, alongside my other delusion I died and now what I'm experiencing is merely a simulation and I am actually in whatever the "afterlife" would be. I am convinced I am immortal, yet somehow also I could experience death at Any Second because I perhaps died ages ago and don't remember it;it could kick in when I least expect it, I experience this delusion in a very complicated way. But the thought that? There's people out there that are countless years old, have evaded death endlessly and many that have found the secret to immortality and I myself have scripted and pondered many ways to be immortal; maybe I Am immortal? Not quite yet, but maybe I was destined to be? I don't feel necessarily delusional about these things anymore, I don't feel to the point of "these things are inevitably real in my head but in a scary way because there's no real life way to find proof for myself in any direction negative or positive." I feel more like .. "oh.. maybe these things Are real? I've always been self aware of the delusion aspect of these thoughts, and therefore always known that even if in my head I'm convinced they're real, logically I can't know for sure. But now with this knowledge I feel canceled out, I feel less so on the 'these things are real and I'm spiraling into that scary fact' side of things and moreso on the 'these things are maybe possibly actually probably genuinely Real? And that's neat, I believe they're real as a genuine belief now and I feel like I've found balance. This doesn't feel like a delusional fear anymore, just a belief in a concept that could very very potentially be real."
It's like.. no one ever wants to tell you your delusions are real, because yeah obviously that'd fuck you UP right? But oddly enough for me, whether you'd consider this having enabled me or not; I am not terrified by these ideas anymore, I am not scared of these possible realities, I accept that they're possibly real and I believe in them; I no longer feel like my brain is Forcing me to see things that are fake as real to scare me, I now feel I have reclaimed my paranoia into my own personal beliefs.
Whether understandable or not, I deeply thank Everyone from the shifting community and I hope all of you get exactly what you need and exactly what you deserve, I hope we all do, I know we all will. I feel at peace with my own confusing brain for once finally, and I hope it's understandable how deeply much that means.
#flying.fish🌌#reality shifting#shiftblr#reality shift#shiftinconsciousness#shifting antis dni#shifting reality#shifting#shifting community#shifting realities#just like HEAVY on the shifting antis dni on this one#i know how i work and i know myself. i know im doing good and healthy and i know this is all a positive for me.#i do Not need people coming in here going “erhhrhmm actchually i think youre becoming More delusional”#like my guy the time i was the most delusional was when i was being repetetively told my delusions werent real and being shut down#so i couldnt even say anything about them without being treated like i was batshit insane#until i Became batshit insane due to that treatment#everyone requires different help and everyone heals differently. i thought for years it was the same for everyone with delusions; just..#stay in the middle. dont say yes dont say no. don't deny dont encourage. but honestly that drives me INSANE personally?#it feels like... similar situation w my autistic self#when i am so so convinced someone is mad at me but they just Will Not tell me whats going on#i am Doomed to spiral#my personal need is a form of confirmation that wont shock my brain into a spiral but will allow it to acclimate ig?#my parents barely listened to me about my delusional disorders. therapists pushed them aside to work on easier things. even people who also#have delusions entirely ignored me when i wanted to jus . ask for mild advice or Talk to people i can relate to#this. this has been the Only Thing that has healed me in this area#and that is why i laugh in the face of “reality shifting is a delusion”
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professional help, finale. All's well what ends well.
simon riley x original character.
'Nothing's gonna hurt you, not while I'm around.'
'You know, I still think about that day a lot.'
'You do?'
He shifted beside her, making the covers shuffle and move on her body. He grabbed the hem of the sheet, pulling it on her naked shoulders, he knew she was always cold in the morning.
'Sometimes.'
She kept her eyes closed, she was still sleepy, and at the same time she didn't really want to remember. The fact that he still thought about that time frightened her. It was guilt, what she felt. He pulled a hair from the pillow, a long blonde curl, 'This yours…' He felt her cold feet trying to fit in the space between his calves, he welcomed them to warm them up.
Me and Simon never went on that date. I'm Alba, by the way. Me and Simon never went on that date, after the bar or whatever. A lot has changed since then and we really just forgot about it. You best believe we had other problems. If everything happens for a reason, I sometimes still struggle to see it. I lost everything. I lost everything and I don't know what I gained. Well, that's wrong, Simon's what I gained. Simon is all I have. I look back at who I was when this mess started, hell, I look back at who I was when I got my job as a therapist and I just… I don't recognise myself. Sometimes I envy the times when I was so clueless. Life's more painless for the brainless. Sometimes I even wish I could go back. Simon is the only real reason why I choose to stay. Simon is the reason why it all went to shit, really. Me and him, we played a pivotal role in each others lives, his life changed too when he met me. And when, well, the whole thing went down. The beginning of the end. Here's what happened that night.
We drank some more, I was tipsy and so was everyone. It was nearly two in the morning when Roman offered me a ride home. Truth be told, I don't really remember what I said, I have very little memories of that part of the night. I think I might have looked at Simon, who asked me if I needed a ride, if I drove there, to which I said no, that I was gonna get a cab. He spoke to me like the others weren't there, he spoke in a protective way. No way he was gonna let me get a cab, or go home with Roman for that matter. He claimed me. Roman didn't insist when I told him I was with Simon. We left together, as everyone suspected. They had been saying it since he walked in, they're gonna go home together. Nothing happened, if that's what you're thinking. I was way too drunk and he was respectful. He walked me to my door and said hi to the dog. I thanked him for the ride and he looked at me with those gentle, deep, brown eyes I love so much. He said to sleep tight, with a confidence he didn't have within himself at the bar. It made me giggle and I almost invited him to come inside and spend the night. I'm kinda glad I didn't.
'I don't like that you bring that up', she murmured, she turned her back to him, rolling to her side and hugging the pillow under her head. Embarrassed. He sighed, 'Why, cause you know you messed up?' She felt burning in her chest. She felt his arm, firmly wrapping around her waist, was like poison. A trap. She tried to resist his force, he pulled her towards him, his chest against her back, both arms around her to keep her in his warm embrace. One of his legs swung on her to keep her from escaping him, he was always afraid she wanted to run away from him. Even if he woke up beside her every day.
He told me everything that happened and how things went not long ago, I waited a year to know, maybe more. Again, a lot has happened, so we forgot about some parts of our story. He told me how happy he was and how weird he felt that night, driving to base. Good things didn't really happen to people like him, and I was a good thing. I was good, I treated him like he was good. He drove to base, went to bed and thought about me all night. He thought about our date, the dress I was going to wear, my eyes, my neck, the skin of my hands. He thought of us eating, talking, maybe bringing Jinx along with us. He fell asleep wondering where to go with me, he hoped to dream about me in his bed. Silly.
She huffed and whined at him, trying to free herself from his grasp. 'Where you going?' He whispered and she scratched his arm. 'You're always wrong.' She commented. They had that talk a million times, he never failed to make her feel miserable. 'You're selfish.' He pinned her down in a swift motion, his body on top of hers, one hand brushing her hair away from her face. Her breasts were pressed against his chest, out of habit, she had spread her legs to welcome him. Her feet rested on his calves. 'I'm selfish because I love you'. He nuzzled his face in the crook of her neck, breathing in her scent. She circled his shoulders with her arms. 'You would have done the same thing, if not worse.' She pushed him back away from her, her hands pressed as firmly as she could on his pecs. He was smiling.
The day after, he woke up groggy from the alcohol. He told me he couldn't be bothered with the briefing for the next mission and debated skipping it. His mind was somewhere else. Little did he know. Ruining his mood, that is the thing I'm most sorry for. I like my man happy. He sat down in a room full of soldiers, Price in front of them, his computer screen projected in the wall like he had prepared some kind of presentation. He told me the captain looked tense, or rather sad. It was a day he never really thought would come, he had news he didn't really want to share, or believe. Seeing him like this, made his heartbeat increase, he started to sweat. Something was going on.
'I would have done worse, yes…' His words were spoken into her cheek, he left a trail of wet kisses on her jawline, making her sigh loudly, her legs firmly wrapped around his waist '…you broke my heart.' She scoffed and let her hand travel down his back, scratching the skin of his lumbar muscles, 'So dramatic…' He cradled her face with his hands, forcing her to look at him. He liked teasing her about that time, and he knew how bad she felt. It was cause he craved reassurance that she would never do anything like it, ever again.
'Sit down, please.' He felt his palms sweaty, he felt a sense of discomfort. 'We had a…', even the captain, he was struggling to find the words, he looked unease. What in the world was going on…
'We're talking mafia. Uhm… Italian mafia, from Naples. It's called Camorra, I believe.' He stopped to check some papers, 'Laswell and Shepherd have been keeping an eye on a specific clan from over there, they're dealing with prostitution and drug trafficking.' He sighed. This was no normal mission. He tuned towards his laptop, an image appeared on the wall behind the captain. A woman, in her fifties. She had blonde hair, she wore glasses, she had a stern and serious expression on her face. In the picture, she looked out a window into a busy street. She had blue eyes and a roman nose. 'This is Tania Dalla Rocca, she runs the Dalla Rocca family. In Italy, especially in the south, they have very patriarchal families, but her husband, the ex leader, died in prison. She's been in control of the business for over twenty years.' He went back to the laptop and a new image appeared. A man, maybe his age, a dark brown buzzcut. 'This is Carmine Caserano, he runs the opposing clan. They've been fighting with the Della Roccas for decades, over businesses, neighbourhoods… They're eternal enemies.' He cleared his voice. Simon began to feel a stinging pain in his left temple. 'We're in charge of dismantling both families, essentially.' He let his eyes wander inside the room and Simon could swear he let his gaze linger on him for a few seconds. Pitiful. I'm sorry, son. 'They've been in contact with Italian-American immigrants for a while and the situation is escalating quickly, they're terrorising citizens, we're gonna work with Italian special forces in Naples and try to solve the situation.' '
'What situation?' someone asked. He could not turn his head to look at who spoke, he was frozen in his chair.
'So… someone in the Dalla Rocca family is responsible for a… an accident, back in 2013. Explosives inside a car. One of the Caseranos died.' He was about to click on the laptop again, but stopped. 'The Caseranos, the other family, is moving for revenge, they want control over the territory, sure, but more than anything they want revenge. Many innocent lives are at stake.'
'So, are we protecting the other family? And the terrorist?'
Price shook his head. 'No one is worth protecting. No one is innocent over there. It's incarceration or death, for all of them. And the… terrorist, what she is is a terrorist, is someone many of you know, I'm afraid.'
Her eyelashes fluttered, a small whimper escaping from her parted lips. 'You broke my heart, Eva', he murmured into her mouth, he licked her lower lip, feeling her soft hand cupping his cheek. She replied by taking his face in her hands and kissing him softly, pulling him down towards her.
A click of the keyboard, a new picture appeared on the wall. As he leaned foreword, to better see the image, the ringing in his ears was becoming almost painful. He didn't need to lean in, he could see me perfectly. A young Jude was painted in the wall behind Price. My eyes, my mouth, the bridge of my nose, it was definitely me, younger and angrier. 'She's not even 18 in this picture'. Price's voice mixed with the murmuring and chatting of Simon's colleagues, who had recognised the girl on the screen. The terrorist.
She brushed her thumb over his lower lip, he kissed her hand and then her mouth again. His arms kept her still, his hand pressed firmly on her hipbone, scorching hot.
He felt like throwing up. He felt like an idiot. Like a fly in a spider's net, I had tricked him and everyone else into believing I was someone else, Alba. Him specifically, my special Simon. Without saying a word, Price skipped to the next picture. It was a classified FBI file. His eyes scanned the file, reading through the mountains of lies I had told him, reading the truth. The whole truth. He was being set up, it could not be real. His head was throbbing, his blood cold. It had to be a joke, a sick, sick joke.
His hips aligned with hers, he drank the soft gasp that left her lips when she felt him slip inside her.
'This is Eva. Jude. Some of you know her as Alba'. Price gave him a quick look, but he wasn't paying attention. His eyes felt like they were burning thought the wall. Eva. 'The woman I showed you earlier…' That's her mother, he thought. '…That's Eva's mother.' No… That's Alba, no? No, Eva. Eva Dalla Rocca, I wasn't born in the UK, I was born and raised in Southern Italy, by one of the most influential clans in Naples. I have a sister, I had a brother. 'She was hired here and given a fake identity, under the condition of cutting all ties and contact with her family…' Price went on. Eva. Not Alba, not just a therapist, what? Eva. Southern Italy, the fucking mafia? Naples, moved away when I was 18 after a major attack that let to the death of an infant, he read. My Alba? How? An attack? How? Why? It couldn't be, it had to… it had to be a mistake, I was with him the night before, so pretty, so sweet, I held his hand...
Her nails pressed on the flesh of his back and shoulders, while he rocked his hips foreword. Opening his eyes, he took in the sight of her, curled against him, clinging to him like she was afraid he was gonna vanish like a fever dream. Her brows furrowed, mouth agape sucking in a breath. He saw her in that state every single night, and yet it never failed to make him dizzy, the amount of pleasure he was able to make her feel. The necklace he bought her fell in the middle of her chest, a blue stone shining in the morning light.
'Since she broke no contact yesterday night, we have every reason to believe she's going back to her roots, possibly helping out her family. She's our first target.' Eva. Terrorist. He had just asked the terrorist on a date. Broke no contact, I was a criminal. I was hired and given a fake identity. Eva was hired and became Alba. Eva. God help him, so many lies, and he believed. Every. Single. Word.
He leaned down close, desperate to feel more of her, everything. It was never enough, he was never close enough, always needed more. She raised her hips from the mattress, reaching for him. He allowed himself to relax and lay his head beside her on the pillow. She had one arm around his neck, one hand pressed on his chest. Left side, his heart. 'Scusami', he said in her mother tongue. His hips lazily grinding against her, he moaned her name into her neck repeatedly like he was praying. Her legs straddled his hips, she was shaking.
'I'm sorry to everyone who considered her a friend.'
This is what happens when you let your guard down. Now Simon, Ghost, wasn't good with feelings, but he sure was good at war. Next target, did the captain say? Target. A job. Terrorist. Consider it done, then. War was what I wanted, war was what I was created for. Well, so was Simon. War was what he would bring me.
This is what happens when you let your guard down, this is what gets people heartbroken, killed, fooled, this is what happens to people like him. Betrayed. By me of all people, his sweet angel. It was absurd, but he let me do this, he gave me permission to ruin eveything, deep down it was his own fault.
Such an idiot.
On top of him, she intertwined her fingers with his, pinning his arms to the mattress, stretching them above his head. Her movements against him were erratic and desperate, back and forth, he whimpered like he was crying. Making him feel so good, it was her way of saying she was sorry. She kissed his eyes, she kissed his cheek and his mouth. She created a world from scratch just for him, a world where he was only hers, every hour of every day. Hers to love, to take care of. She reminded him every day, he was hers forever. He was safe everyday. Nothing's gonna hurt you. Not while I'm around. When his hands were freed, he circled her back with his strong arms, needed to feel her at all times, her belly pressed against him, her ribcage, her breasts. She run her hands through his hair that were starting to stick with sweat. ‘Sei l’amore della mia vita’ she whispered, like a hymnal. He believed her. He couldn't possibly do any different.
notes: happy professional help finale! I started writing this series after thinking about it a lot, I am new to all this. I wrote at least 27 chapters before even publishing the introduction, over a year ago. I am very very happy to have continued this project to the point of finishing part one. I still have a lot in mind and a lot of things that I want to explore with my characters. thank you so so much to all of you that liked, reblogged and commented such sweet things!! I really appreciate it so so much and I hope you'll continue to love Alba, or better, Eva and Simon as much as I love them.
I'm gonna go back to writing!
enjoy!
mare.
taglist:
@random-fandom-smoothie
@ghostlythots @sweetfemmefatal @natxpat @chavarriakeren647 @ravenmoore14 @farther-than-pleiades @internallyscreamings @hwromi @atoxicrat @cuti3maddi3 @deafeningkittenblaze @its-celeste @serene-hills @lexidoll12 @poohkie90 @lunatiquess
@warmedbythebody @katzykat @iristhemuse @azkza @keiraslayz @abbyandermine @jennyjencakes @dest-nai @corset-briefs @nutze-kekse @ilytsukiw @b3anspr0ut
@pondsblog @missyouzoe @fallenkitten @bigauthorrascalturkey @bethtay @angelynn-nicole @starluv @stargirlisworld @giyuuslittleslut @impossiblecupcakelight
@rkrivees-blog @ghosts-hoe @kam1snotverysmart @gauky76 @freyjaaasstuff @spicyspicyliving @scottpilgrimvsmyfists @courtney0-0 @shinchanboi @darling006 @my-therapist-hates-me @asteriadisera
#ghost cod#simon ghost riley#cod mw2#ghost fanfiction#call of duty#cod modern warfare#cod fic#cod 141#task force 141#tf 141#ghost simon riley#ghost mw2#gaz call of duty#call of duty mw3#ghost call of duty#call of duty modern warfare#modern warefare ii#modern warfare#taskforce 141#johnny soap mactavish#john soap mactavish#captain price#simon riley call of duty
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So do you guys actually think that Jason's entire story, relationship to the others, and philosophy amounts to him being a rebellious teen who wants his dad's attention? Like are you 100% serious? I thought you were joking about that but too many of you are saying it with your whole chest.
And what the fuck is this "Bruce antagonizing Jason is fanon!" Shit I've been seeing? You guys are aware that a parent can love their kid and still be a shit parent right? I know you guys don't want to fathom the thought that maybe your blorbo might also occasionally have to face responsibility for consistently endangering children but let's not start being delusional now.
Bruce does love his kids, that doesn't mean that he hasn't hurt them. And I'd also argue that for the most part he feels in the right for it, and he's said multiple times that he believes it's for their own good, so you can't even argue that he's sorry about it. It's okay for you guys to admit that your PERSONAL INTERPRETATION of the character wouldn't do that but don't sit here and pretend that it's not a facet of the source.
#you can argue meta until you're blue in the face#but I can't ignore the ingerent abuse of Batman and Robin because DC is always drawing attention to it#Stephanie and Jason directly died because of Robin#Stephanie wanted to impress Bruce to live up to his idea of a sidekick and prove her worth#Sheila only sold Jason out when she found out he was Robin#Damians life certainly got worse when he became Robin/moved with Bruce#if you bring up racist retcons I'll kill you btw#how are we supposed to read children dying and being tortured and traumatized constantly#and just ignore that these are children#I can ignore the reality of child sidekicks in campy light hearted early comics#but if DC wants to deal with serious topic they're going to have to deal with some serious implications too#Also that post that's going around about “Bruce loves Jason and it's Jason who's causing all the animosity” is such bullshit#what the fuck are you even talking about#and let's not act like Jason is the ONLY one at fault and Bruce is just a poor loving father#is Bruce spreading that utter bullshit about Jason's death and who he was not an act of violence?#was he not the one to cast the first stone by disgracing Jason's legacy and using a version of him that never existed as a cautionary tale#and I know some of you are going to argue that with most of the kids there's nothing Bruce could have done to stop them#and this is the one time in which I will ignore all the very real ways that he could have#but I still think that in universe the characters have a right to be angry about it#Jason always since his debut as red hood been a vehicle for calling out Bruce#he's so heavily steeped in meta narrative because his run is when they started dealing with the real BAD cases#The Cult Garzonas onscreen murders were getting more common#AND NO ONE CAN CONVINCE ME THAT BEING ROBIN DIDN'T MAKE JASON'S LIFE WORSE#THERE WAS NO REASON TO MAKE HIM ROBIN HE COULD HAVE BEEN VERY HAPPY AS JUST A NORMAL KID#But Bruce made having a place in his home synonymous with being Robin because the narrative dictated it had to be#what was homeless orphan Jason going to do? say no?#it was basically coercion and it doomed him and he has every right to blame the adult that put him in that position#dc#bruce wayne critical#bat family
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i have a headache
#i've been stuck scrolling instagram for the past few days#i don't even like being on there#modern ig is so overstimulating everything is either a reel or a reel in disguise or an image post that inexplicably has audio#i kept making myself go on there because i wanted to find a way to make art friends or a community or w/e#and i thought if i had more of a presence and interacted more i'd eventually get people to like. talk to me and comment stuff ig. idk#but ughhhh#i don't think insta is a good platform for that cause it's either pictures with a short caption or the worst media format known to man#like. idk i wanted to find and follow and be friends with and be Cool Artists (don't ask me to define that)#but no artist on instagram is a Cool Artist because there's no goddamn text on there#like if it makes sense i wanna find people who talk About art as well#but not in an art Discourse way#which is another thing. even if instagram had more Talking it would still be shit because the mainstream 'art community' is insufferable#art tiktok is that on steroids#and instagram is is bootleg tiktok#the same five discourse topics jokes memes advice whatever the only difference is now they're circlejerking about ai too#i wanna be Casual and Spontaenous and Mysterious and shit but IG's layout makes me feel like i can't just post whatever#i feel this pressure to give my posts all the same format and add tags and do this and do that and have good Branding or w/e#and it's just ughhh why can't I be a famous enigma (<- doesn't make or share anything)#even on tumblr the pressure is the same#and at the same time i hate looking back on my art accounts (both ig and here) because it just. doesn't align with what i wanna do#like my attempts at categorising and tagging and being consistent#it's just so. yuck#i want to have a Good Brand but i also want to be 'real' but then i look back at my disjointed messy past work and i cringe#i think i need to block my irls from my art accounts bc i feel super embarassed trying to do any typical Get Noticed on Social Media thing#cause it feels embarassing being seen doing shit that's ''influencer-y'' (idk what to call it)#cause it feels out of character to how i actually am in real life#but also why i do want to show my ''real'' character? I'm not cool#and that's another thing I've had these accounts for ages#looking at my past posts makes me fuckign cringe#I want to purge them or start over
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doodle page of ep 42
#critical role#critical role spoilers#cr spoilers#orym of the air ashari#imogen temult#laudna#fearne calloway#chetney pock o'pea#ashton greymoore#no fcg cause i fucking hate drawing them i need to redo his design....#make them more round or smth. they're a pain to draw rn which sucks cause i love he !!!!#in other news this episode was so well deserved. bells hells deserve to have a silly and fun time.#and it is SO good to see silly orym again. as beautiful as the day i lost you.#bbygirl the gods have been watching you since exu. i love you so much.#a lesbian <- in love with orym of the air ashari#he really does only know how to run and jump....and play.#i cannot believe how well travis was rolling for chet too. fucking inSANE. the dice loved him.#also laudna is so real for immidiately wanting to cheat for her friends. she gets it.#aUGH and imogen and orym friendship. god tier. good to see them hanging out. he care for her so much.#i'll probably continue with relsitening to cr3 instead of exu today...#bells hells i love you.#so good to see ash being softer now too ;3; but also please be nice to paté he's just a guy...i hope...#the drinks they got each member...babygirl you love these people so much. (also not me analyzing each choice like some cycle path)#i want....whatever the fuck laudna got. and whatever fearne got cause silly straw :)#and y'know what yeah i AM going to read too much into their drink choice for orym#it's my brainrot and i choose how it manifests#oK I STFU NOW BYEEEEE#if you read all these tags you are a trooper and i love you thanks for listening to my silly thoughts#ep doodles
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how is this not like a connecting art card look he's even by the water wheres the matching kyogre :( where is it :(
#they're worsties. come on#wanting more pokemon cards to tack up on my wall once i get my maxie card in the mail hashtag sorry for party rocking#you should NEVER collect pokemon cards for monetary value you should ONLY collect them to be gay#in absence of any kind of real oras archie and maxie merchandise i must scratch the itch with groudon and kyogre themselves.#they didnt even get anything for secret teams cause it was rse archie and maxie in rainbow rocket :sob: sob sob sbo#looking at the rse archie rubber strap hanging off my desk lamp you willl never be him .#<- alittle mean sorry didn't mean it. anyways i found myself thinking a lot more about those big ol weather kaiju this time around#I like how they just exist to fight with one another i like how they just fight and cause death and destruction and hurt when despite being#relatively peaceful and even thought of as heroic or saviors when not in conflict but once they begin to fight they just are so focused#on destroying one another that they bring catastrophe... and once that fight is over they're just sealed away and dormant..#just their essence to fight and never overcome that hatred to the point where they just have to be completely removed from the picture#and well you know what else i like thinking about...........#must it always be like this? sources say.. maybe#(insert supercut of every time archie and maxie have died in various aspects of pokemon media canon) which is so many times btw#they're like the hamsters of this franchise always dying in really fucked up ways#i have to tagyap when i'm too embarrassed to make full posts on their own
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Reclining on a fainting couch, hands laced together and resting over my stomach as I stare up at the ceiling. Why the fuck do I so frequently end up caught between being attracted to mean guys (and gals) but also the wife material guys? Duality of man is falling for both all the time, apparently, and never knowing which I actually genuinely like better.
I wrote out a whole theory about why I like mean people before I realised the logic no longer applied to my current circumstances/character and now I'm back at square one. Perhaps the real answer is as lame as: because I like a challenge and the idea that someone treats me Extra Special compared to how they treat others.
At the end of the day, idk.
#reflecting on characters like jin kamurai primarily#cause like. why HIM girl lol#don't get me wrong he also gets on my nerves#I Do Not like getting bossed around (much) (okay well maybe it depends)#I hate waiting on someone's hand and foot 24/7 but actually I don't mind being an errand boy (gender neutrally)#there's a difference trust me#but there needs to be some kind of reward involved#thankless stuff will just have my eye twitching#maybe apply that logic to how I like specific kinds of mean guys#the reward for pursuing them despite on the surface getting no return since they're mean and uninterested#can range from getting a flustered/unusual reaction out of them to actually finding a tiny thing to grasp onto and be delusional about#in the end the reward is hard-earned dopamine#again idk I'm just rambling and thinking aloud#the Extra Special part is pathetically real though#spent a lot of time yearning for a best friend until I found some#and a selfish part of me wants to be special in other ways to someone too#you know???#I think now we're circling back to an element of my og theory I drafted where this is all linked to childhood#how typical#in a more humorous sense there's a way I can apply all this to the way I enjoy videogames but that might be an essay for another day#while we also examine themes of self-inflicted suffering and again challenges
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I want more Lockhale stuff
#Flint Lockwood#brent mchale#i truly miss them sm btw#i want to make a fanart of them about christmas#cwacom#but I WANT MORE OF THEM 'CAUSE THEY'RE TOO REAL#it reminds me about the tree ep idk why SHHSHS it was so fucking gay
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It baffles me sometimes how Yakuza 0 is about the weight of taking a life and how death and killing is a big deal and then the rest of the series it's like lol no.
Female character? Kill her off with little fanfare and development. Helpful side character? Dies for the protag. Antagonist? Have them off themselves.
Characters whose deaths could've and probably should've carried more weight but we don't get enough focus or development on their character. Potential is often squandered. And yes, there is something hard hitting about losing a character before they truly had the chance to flourish, but when it keeps happening? We can't build on character bonds, that'd mean cutting down on substories!! What do you mean we've done this one before it's different now!!!
Not to mention when the franchise decides that completely fatal wounds Are Fine Actually They're Alive And Well All Along. And, y'know. The Heat Actions. Akiyama has kicked many men to death and you won't convince me otherwise.
Idk I like the franchise but I feel there's a bit of lack of tonal cohesion here and there. Notably.
#smol speaks#smol plays yakuza#you are free to disagree but i cannot take the idea the franchise treats death with weight seriously#every one so far has ended with an antagonist who's actually really interesting and could have so much more done with them only for them to#fuckin kill themselves whilst taking out the ACTUAL villain who is far less interesting and basically always just 'Bad Man In Suit'#just Dude Who Wants Power. which yeah in a franchise about yakuza makes sense but they're not interesting about it despite being the REAL#mastermind or w/e. and then Yakuza 4 switched things up by not even giving us an interesting secondary antagonist so very brave move there!#and of course wasting Yasuko's potential but that's fine I'm not bitter. and before you go 'but what about Sayama/Makoto' they get shipped#off to the States and Hana-chan got made skinny so shh. There's a greater pattern at play here and we can talk about the#writing for female characters another time. i'm just saying there gets to a point where death in the franchise doesn't shock me#it does often disappoint me though. if it's not Kiryu or Majima or Haruka or some other protag don't get too attached cause even if they#don't die you likely won't see them again. also they likely will die because fuck you actually. or rubber bullets. as a double fuck you
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