#bull in a china shop

[bobbie-robron]

Needing a loan to pay for the expenses is gonna ruin it anyway so.

12-Apr-2019

[dedf1sh-is-missing]

Dedf1sh is Missing

Last seen playing the Xylophone with a Bull in a China shop

[euesworld]

"So we were in the mood and we were making out.. everything was going great and she's like, close the blinds.. so I did.. then she's like, fix the curtains. I'm like jesus man, ok, ok.. so I start fixing the curtains so no one can see and the effing curtain rod fell and I shit you not, a stained glass butterfly hit my girl in the eye and she's like F$@K, I think I got a black eye!! At this point, she's holding up this huge piece of glass and I'm feeling horrible but I can't help but to laugh cause I think to myself.. she really does have butterflies in her eyes. I've been writing about that for a long time, I just never imagined they'd give her a black eye, haha.. needless to say, the mood was over and if it resulted in a restraining order, I think the relationship would be over too, haha.. I mean, who knew that getting butterflies could be violent? Is that a sign that she is in love with me or a bad omen that the relationship will hurt a bunch? I try not to read too much into it cause she kisses like a hungry sucker fish looking for sustenance and it makes me want to munch that bitch, haha.. side note. She is not really a bitch. She just likes to yell at me when I'm not eating it, no wonder she's mad all the time.. she is like shut me up mf. I'm kidding. She is pretty great most of the time.."

Every time she says something about her eye, I just remember how good she kisses and I smile.. is that bad? Should I be concerned? I mean, she just has this little red mark and I'm very happy that she didn't end up losing her eye.. thank god for small miracles - eUë

[brattygrymblade]

My Porcelain glam for P7S.

Cause ya know theres a lot of bulls.

[diet-poison]

metaphors for everything you can't afford

You live in a house decorated according to your url. What does it look like

[shotmrmiller]

the trope of you accidentally catching a peek of someone having sex with another and instead of fucking off you stick around and hope they don't find out except they already know but:

you're roommates with active military soap and it works because he's hardly there, he's real easy to be friends with and when his hands wander it's not totally repulsive because he's hot.

and then he brings his boyfriend over and you'd only meant to get some ice cream from the freezer but they left the door cracked open. you, as the good friend he doesn't fucking deserve, close the door while keeping your eyes glued to the ceiling and go about your day.

(you're so teasing him about the fact that he sounds like a bleating sheep while getting rawdogged lmaoooo)

but the one that catches you in the kitchen minding your own business isn't soap. it's his boyfriend. and his boyfriend is as forward as a freight train on a downhill slope.

"saw ya lookin' at us."

? you did no such thing.

"if ya were lookin' for a fuck, coulda just said so."

you were doing no such thing but it doesn't matter because you're but a simple hot blooded individual and having two doting meat heads fighting over who gets to taste you first is something out of a romance book.

[jchamphero]

I know how I get so I tread lightly

[blueskiesandstarrynights]

Somewhere out there, there's an alternate universe where Percy, someone fairly suseptible to the mist, brings home his good friend Tyson to hang out after school and Sally, a very clear sighted mortal, is staring at Tyson like 💧👁️👄👁️

[xensilverquill]

"And for all I know he is sitting there still, under his favorite cork tree, smelling the flowers just quietly." 🐂🪻

(x)

Grape-flavored jawbreaker bull I made for @afoxysunny! The legs/pose on this were a fun challenge, and I'm so happy with how he turned out!

[cologona]

It’s important to me that Jason look just like Dick, but only as a kid.

Once Jason gets older his features mature into something totally different and it’s obvious they have different body types.

Like Bruce took home a ‘teacup pig’ one day thinking it was so cute and small, not knowing what he was getting himself into. Now ten years later, he has a several-hundred-pound animal who’s huge and hairy and way smarter than he ever expected or wanted it to be, hanging out in his house causing problems and he doesn’t like it so much anymore.

[happypeachsludgeflower]

Crack humor au fic where Qi Rong time travels back to his childhood and, due to his insanity and disgust for his cousin, he acts like a brat to the Crown Prince and somehow unintentionally fixes all of Xianle’s (and therefore Xie Lian’s) problems while trying to sabotage Xie Lian’s reputation and chances at ascension.

[navree]

sam would have worked well in the archives of the magnus institute because, like most other archival staff, he appears to have the subtlety of a grizzly bear

[bubblegumflavor]

look at their hands and arms TOT

Johnny being 100 times bigger than Daniel is my everything. (and still sees him as a real threat and equal opponent)

[galacticspacemermaid]

Your monster boyfriend hears you're craving something sweet and raids a 7-11. He returns with arms full of all of your favorite candies and drinks.

"I didn't know what to get," he says trying and failing to present the treats to you.

You watch the treats fall to the ground and gasp as your favorite lands at your feet. "You're the best!" You fling yourself at him and he catches you midair pulling you to his chest.

Your monster boyfriend lets out a satisfied purr and whispers, "I can get more."

You laugh and pull back to look at him. "Did you even pay for this?"

His ears twitch and his head tilts. "Pay?"

****

Your monster boyfriend is all over the news as 'The Winged Devil' that destroyed the local 7-11. The store worker is visibly shaken in the interview and the shelves are all toppled.

[extasiswings]

“Journalists stop asking actors about Buddie” challenge but also this is Comedy Gold.

[etherealfishyfeelings]

Being the pluto person in Venus Square Pluto synastry sucks butt. The aspect sucks butt overall but oh my heavens. Its like I can see that me and the Venus person are wildly incompatible and that the Venus person is wearing thee rosiest of rose tinted glasses. I find them infuriating but I want to protect them at the same time but they also have a terrible habit of rubbing salt right into the pluto wound without meaning to and this shit is just one enormous rollercoaster of pain and realizing that I am not as emotionally mature as I'd like. Ew. Literally feels like beauty and the beast.