#bucky is just a poor ex-soldier trying to get his life back together and he falls for an ice princess and probably kills for her

[captain-noir]

ok sort of tsh inspired dark academia au in which, war-worn james barnes attends a prestigious northeastern university with a full-ride scholarship and is introduced to a foursome of rich and stylish literati by his roommate. the udakus and the maximoffs live in that near decrepit mansion, at the edge of town and throw the most lavish soirees.

shuri and erik, wakandan royalty, first and second in line to the throne respectively, are geniuses and in their young age, mastered various disciplines ranging from the natural sciences to the ancient tongues. wanda and pietro, friends of the royals, geniuses in their own right and speak upwards of 5 languages have survived war-torn sokovia. orphaned, they were raised by industrialist nick fury, a family friend.

rich fucking foreign assholes, bucky’s roommate grumbles as he sorts out small packets of white powder. great customers though.

pietro, the most affable of the bunch, and bucky’s assistant professor in History of Russian Literature extends an invitation to him and unsettled but yearning for something bigger than himself, he attends the party and partakes in their brand of debauchery for an entire weekend. 

he is charmed and enamored by them. for all their differences, they exude a similar apathetic coolness, an inborn trait, bucky muses, as if they are a few degrees removed from this reality. but it’s shuri with her cold unattainability, delicate features and sharp smiles that sets his mind on fire.

slowly, he ingratiates himself within their ranks, revels in their seductive decadence and splendor, their time-honored traditions and vices. fucked out and blissed most days, bucky for the first time exists beyond the humdrum of his peers, unencumbered by past demons or current responsibilities. and as he slowly descends into their chaos, he sets in motion a series events that will change all of their lives profoundly, forever. 

[princehrry-writings]

All For Me?

i love this one so much and i think it's so cute!!

warnings: ddlg themes, mafia themes, cursing, anxiety, past abusive relationships, if i missed anything let me know!

also a surprise visit from one of our favorite super soldier ;)

wordcount: 1160

masterlist

Baby doesn’t want Daddy to get mad at her but he could never get mad at his little baby 🥺

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She didn’t ask him for it, but somehow Daddy’s black AMEX card had ended up in her possession as she was nudged out the door and told to go have fun. As she slid into the backseat of the black armored vehicle with the driver and her favorite body guard, Bucky, she chewed on her lip worried what his definition of fun might be.

Their relationship wasn’t very new. They’d been together almost a year and they lived together, but Harry had never given her his credit card before. He had a meeting at the house that he didn’t want her there for, in case the people he was meeting tried to pull some shit. So he sent her out with his best guard and told her to have fun. She didn’t really know what to do with herself.

She’d met Harry because of her ex-boyfriend. He was a lower-level dealer and Harry was his supplier, and one time he brought her with him for a meet up. Harry saw him treating the poor girl like shit and offered her an out and she’d never looked back since. Things between Y/n and Harry had moved pretty quickly to anyone looking at it from the outside, but everything was perfect between the two. They were happy and that was all they cared about. No one would say anything to him about it anyway seeing as he was the boss and would take out anyone who questioned him and his life choices.

Y/n was worried that she’d get in trouble if she spent too much money, getting flashbacks to all the times her ex would berate her if she bought “needless things' '. She couldn’t go out for coffee with her friends, couldn’t buy herself new clothes, couldn’t get things that weren’t on the list at the grocery store. She felt all of those restrictions that horrid man had put on her even though Harry has always allowed her to do whatever the fuck she wanted. She owns that man, the only place he lets himself think he has control over her is the bedroom. She calls the shots even though he has the title of Daddy. She doesn’t really know any of this though. She just goes about her days, trying to keep Harry happy, and keep herself out of trouble. The poor thing still doesn’t realize the hold she has over her Daddy.

“Miss, when we arrive at the mall, I’m going to pull up to the front and let you and Mr. Barnes out then I’ll go park the car.” The driver tells her and she nods, watching the city pass her by. All the people with lives she’ll never know anything about, going places she might never see.

When the car pulls to a stop, she waits a second for Bucky to get around to the other side to open her door, just like Daddy taught her, to keep her safe just in case. A lot of people are always looking for ways to hit Harry, she was a great way to do that.

Y/n and Bucky walk in, her eyes widening at all the different stores, and she grabs onto his arm. The girl tends to wander off a bit when she’s feeling little, which she was right now because of how anxious she was about making Daddy mad, and Bucky knew as soon as she latched onto him that he had to be on red alert the whole time. Baby, as everyone affectionately called her when she was little, was very sensitive and needed special attention because she overthinks everything. Her emotions go all out of whack and she’s just an all out wreck. But Bucky has been doing this for a while now and is getting pretty good at keeping her happy.

First things first, he needs to get her something to snack on so he leads her to the food courts and asks her what she wants.

“Pretzel, please?” She mumbles, never forgetting to use her manners. Bucky nods and leads her to get a pretzel and a blue raspberry lemonade, which she giggles at because “make my tongue blue!”

Once she’s snacking, he lets her decide what stores she wants to go to. She doesn’t even like making decisions when she’s in a bigger headspace, so for now she just chooses the first one she sees and rolls with it. She looks around, seeing all these cute things she likes but when she looks at the price, she decides she doesn’t like them that much. Bucky is confused… Doesn’t she know she has free range over Harry’s bank account? She keeps picking things up and putting them back, but he chalks it up to her just not really wanting them that bad.

She ends up only getting a few things and by the time they're done, Bucky’s got the all clear to bring her home. He warns his boss that Baby’s regressed and they're on their way home.

Walking through the door, Baby is feeling happy about not spending a whole lot of money but still getting a few cute things she thinks daddy will like too. But when she walks through the door and sees his confused face, she gets worried. Did she get too much? Did she spend too much money?

“That all you wanted, baby?” He ponders. Now she’s really confused.

“Didn’t wanna make you mad, daddy…” She murmurs as he pulls her into his chest, petting her hair back from her face to get a better look at her. Harry feels his heart clench in his chest seeing the look on her face. She looks genuinely worried that she did something wrong.

“Why would you make me mad, babygirl? I gave you my card and told you to go have fun! I meant it!” She can feel her heart racing, not understanding in her little mindset that he wasn't mad at her.

“Didn’t wan’ spend too much monies…”

His features round and he pulls her impossibly closer to him, rubbing his hands up and down her back to sooth his baby.

“I would let you spend all my monies, baby. S’all for you anyway!” He whispers the last part in her ear, pressing little kisses to her temple.

“All for me?” She questions, her voice muffled from her head being buried in his neck.

“All for you, baby. Every last penny. You can spend as much of it as you want, and I won’t get mad at you. I don’t think I could ever actually be mad at you, unless you’re being a brat!” She giggles as he tickles her side and his heart warms at the beautiful sounds of her laughter.

“Maybe we should go back to the mall then!” She smiles innocently and he lets out a hearty laugh, continuing to tickle her and chase her around.

[bananapie99]

Excuse Me

Bucky Barnes x Reader

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Bucky Barnes knew several languages. All fluently. He even knew Latin. Who knows Latin?? One language he did not know: American Sign Language. That became crystal clear when you quite literally ran into him while running away from your ex. You didn’t realize the super soldier was right in your path, and the impact made you think you ran into a wall. As you stumbled back, his arm wrapped around your waist, steadying you. Flustered, you look up and realize exactly whose arm you were wrapped in, and suddenly you felt your ears burning. You could tell he was saying something, his chest vibrating and his lips moving. You couldn’t quite read his lips between his hair falling in his face and the inability of your eyes to stay focused under his stare.

Regaining some sense of yourself, you just shook your head and pointed at your ears. I can’t hear you. You opened your mouth to speak the words to him, but you were interrupted by a clearer view of his mouth. It was obvious he was speaking slower, enunciating each syllable. It took everything in your power to not roll your eyes at the man. Believe it or not, that makes it so much harder to read lips. When you stretch out a word, it no longer holds the same shape. This time, you opened your mouth again and spoke to him as you signed.

“I’m deaf, it doesn’t matter how slowly you speak to me. I can’t hear you.”

His cheeks reddened and you saw his mouth move again. I’m sorry.

“Common mistake. And it’s harder to read your lips the slower you talk.”

His eyes were locked onto your hands, watching as you signed. It was kind of cute, watching his brain try to make sense of the motions while hearing your voice.

How did you lose your hearing?

His question took you by surprise. People usually wait a little longer to ask you that, but the look on his face was proof he was genuinely curious.

“In middle school I started getting really bad ear infections, each one worse than the one before. After each infection my hearing was worse, until one day it was just gone.”

That’s why you speak so clearly.

There it was. He found your button and pushed it. Gorgeous super soldier or not, some things just shouldn’t be said. In your head you were debating whether or not to explain to him how insulting that statement is. Instead, you settled on this.

“Maybe so, but I typically don’t speak unless I have to. I don’t like not being able to hear myself, it makes me anxious. Thanks for catching me.”

And then you walked away.

That night you were in your apartment reviewing notes for class, but Bucky Barnes kept invading your thoughts. Accepting defeat, you closed your laptop and walked into the kitchen to brew coffee. Bucky Barnes was even more attractive in person than he looked on the news. Greek god didn’t even do him justice, but it was the closest comparison your mind could draw. Maybe you had been a little rude to him today. It was clear from the beginning he was not trying to offend you. The poor man had actually been genuinely curious, but you let your own insecurities get in the way. If you were to ever run into Bucky Barnes again, which let’s be real is highly unlikely, you would apologize, and this time properly introduce yourself.

As fate would have it, you were running late for class the next morning. It was as though you had learned nothing about what running gets you yesterday. Running gets you into the beautifully sculped arms of a super soldier…could be worse. You smirked to yourself at the thought, but that quickly disappeared when you found yourself stopped suddenly by another wall. There’s no way this is happening. Sure enough, as you looked up, your gaze met with his intoxicating blues. You couldn’t help but let out a chuckle. Apparently, the universe really wanted you to apologize to this man. As you opened your mouth to begin your apology, you were distracted by the sudden movement of his hands, the sun reflecting off the metal of one. Quickly you realized the man was signing to you. He was quite clear and fairly fluid, especially for someone who presumably knew no sign language just the morning before. Bucky was apologizing to you, acknowledging how his questions yesterday may have been inappropriate and at the very least he could tell they made you uncomfortable. It was sweet, really, and you could tell he genuinely meant what he was saying. It wasn’t some thrown together half thought out apology. He had started learning how to sign for goodness sake. Finally, his hands stopped moving and you smiled, taking the opportunity to begin your apology. Slowly you began signing to him, hoping he could understand, but willing to explain if he didn’t know a sign.

Thank you. But I owe you an apology too. I shouldn’t have been so rude to you yesterday. That’s just a sensitive topic for me. Can we start over?

His smile led you to believe he understood. He nodded and his hands started moving again.

I’d like that. A lot.

With a new understanding of each other, you decided to start again, with proper introductions. You told him your name and what your major was at school. He told you his name, though of course you already knew who he was. Bucky Barnes was the sweetest man you had ever met and a total gentleman. He offered to buy you a cup of coffee and that’s how you ended up sitting in this little café for the past five hours. The two of you had a great time getting to know each other and you taught him more sign language and gave him more information about Deaf culture and etiquette. It was amazing how fast he was picking up sign language, including its grammar structure that differs from spoken English. Bucky Barnes made you feel truly seen and understood. You weren’t sure how to explain it, but there was something almost magical about being around him.

Bucky and you made your coffee dates a regular occurrence, when his schedule allowed of course. His interest in sign language never wavered and neither did his ability to easily learn and retain. The more time you spent with him the more you felt yourself falling for him. Of course, from the beginning you were quite taken by his appearance, but your admiration went so much deeper than that. A few months into these little coffee dates, he worked up the courage to ask you on a real date. He was already at the coffee shop when you arrived. As you took a seat you notice his gaze kept shifting and his body was jittery. From someone with his background this was very unusual.

Are you okay? You signed to Bucky.

He just nodded.

You put one of your hands on top of his flesh one and rubbed your thumb against him to attempt to ground him. His eyes suddenly snapped to yours with an intensity you rarely see. His hands were moving.

Can I take you on a proper date?

At first you thought you misunderstood. You asked him to repeat what he said. You saw he was laughing.

Come on doll, it was hard enough to ask you once. You’re really gonna make me do it again?

Was it even a question what your response would be? Of course you said yes, and as you did you saw the muscles in his shoulders relax and a true smile take over his face. You had a feeling this was the start of a long and happy life with Bucky Barnes.

*****************************************************************************************************

@belladonnabarnes @moteldwelling

[whoisbxcky]

Soldat Ex Machina

request: Hi lovey! I have a request for a Bucky imagine if you want to write it: on a mission Bucky gets turned back into the winter soldier and is super protective of the reader and he’s like you are my mission and won’t let anyone near her until he’s back and then he admits he loves you?

pairing: Bucky x Reader

word count: 4500 +/-

warnings: angst, descriptive violence, mild language warning, fluff as heck at the end, teeeeeniest tiniest bit of nsfw if you squint

author’s note: Now, I know what you’re thinking. 

“Toria, why has your one-shot request turned into 4500 words?”

And all I can say, is I’m weak for Bucky Barnes and natural selection is coming for me.

I loved this fic request. I didn’t know I needed soft(ish?) Winter Soldier until now. I hope I did it justice. Thank you so much to anon for excellent prompting. Peace and love. ~ Toria <3

“Alright, south-west corridor is clear, Buck. How’s the auditorium looking?”

You glanced behind you to do your fifth head count of the minute, confirming once again that all seven of the captive scientists were with you. The poor guys had been Hydra’s prisoners for weeks now, and your intel suggested they’d been forced to work on a new version of the super soldier serum during their time here.

Obviously, since two super soldiers were more than enough for you to deal with on a day to day basis, you’d been the first to volunteer to shut the operation down and rescue the hostages. As expected, Bucky was hot on your heels with an offer to assist, not solely for the opportunity to screw with Hydra, but also because together, you were a force to be reckoned with.

With a self-assured nod and a quick, reassuring smile at the weary men behind you, you turned your head once more, awaiting Bucky’s response.

“Auditorium’s clear.”

Bucky’s voice did not reach you over the coms, but instead, you found his head rather comically poking out from between the double doors leading to the room in question, a roguish grin plastered on his face on seeing your expression.

“Dumbass.” You muttered quiet enough that you were sure only Bucky could catch it.

You flashed him a grin as he winked at you, while the two of you guided the scientists into the room, scanning the perimeter for hostiles.

Satisfied the coast was clear, you let yourself drop rather dramatically onto a nearby table, checking the magazine of your Beretta nonchalantly as you called out to the scientists, who were huddled in the centre of the room, Bucky at their side.

“The medevac will be wheels down in two minutes, once on board it’ll take you fellas to our… Base of operations, if you will, for a once over. You’ll be back with your families before you know it.”

You glanced up, offering them yet another reassuring smile and meeting Bucky’s gaze, when suddenly, a loud crackle echoed around you in the vacant hall. You were on your feet again in seconds, eyes scanning around for the source of the noise.

“I wouldn’t count on that, Miss Y/L/N.”

A thick German accent came over the intercom system in each corner of the room, the voice practically reverberating in your skull it was so loud. You grimaced, stepping towards Bucky and the now even more terrified hostages as you responded in a bored tone.

“I find it exceptionally hard to take threats from a hunk of plastic. Why don’t you come on down here, and we can talk about it.”

You smirked then, cocking your pistol and spinning it thrice in hand. You glanced across to see Bucky staring incredulously at you, and you shrugged. A wheezing cackle followed over the speakers.

“I admire your spirit, Miss Y/L/N, and you and Mr. Barnes have performed, exceptionally, so far. But I think now it is time to… Raise the stakes… A little bit.”

You could hear the cockiness in his tone, too self-assured for a man armed with a karaoke kit.

“We’re leaving. Now.” You murmured to Bucky.

He gave you a subtle nod in agreement as you both turned on your heels, guiding the scientists hastily towards the exit.

Suddenly, the way was blocked by a team of nine men all in black, armed to the teeth with automatics. No sooner had you turned to tell Bucky to cover you while you went on the offensive, than a loud crack resonated around the room, and before you could react, a small metal dart had lodged itself in Bucky’s neck.

He let out a grunt of discontent, yanking the syringe out and staring at it, dumbfounded for a moment, before it fell from his grasp and clattered to the floor.

“Bucky!”

You cried out, running towards him just in time to catch his weight as he lurched forward, eyes glassy and dazed expression fixed on your face. You gave a start of despair, rounding on your assailants with a snarl.

“What the hell is this? What have you done to him?”

A grating chuckle came over the speaker once more, and the voice from earlier was all around you, mocking, inescapable.

“Allow me to demonstrate… Žilánie.”

You stared at Bucky incredulously for a beat. This wouldn’t work, all the training Bucky had done in Wakanda had given him control over his Winter Soldier state.

“Ržávyj.”

Bucky’s eyes widened in horror and he pushed you away with a cry, hands gripping his head furiously. You could only watch in sheer terror as the unknown assailant continued to list off his trigger words, and Bucky, despite his best efforts, seemed to be submitting to their effect.

The dart.

Somewhere in the back of your panic-stricken mind, clarity rung through the chaos like the chime of a bell. Whatever concoction that dart contained, must have done something to his mind, made it… Accessible.

You fought back a retch, staring at Bucky with a look that was as much an apology as it was fear. Even on your best day you couldn’t beat Bucky. You were good, but you weren’t a super soldier. Right now, all you could do was get the seven men under your care to safety, and hope Barnes wouldn’t kill you in the process.

As the final words of the cycle were upon you, you looked around the room desperately for an escape. In the panic of watching the Winter Soldier reanimate before your eyes, you’d failed to notice the arrival of three more agents, blocking the door you had entered from. There was no way out.

You moved closer to the now-despairing hostages, muttering to them in a low tone, as calmly as you could muster.

“When I give the signal, you guys take cover. If I d-… If something happens, the medevac will be on the East side of the building-”

“Gruzavój vagón”

Your eyes snapped up in horror, fixating on the man who stood where your partner had once been. Cold, unfeeling eyes stared back, and for a moment, you dared not breath.

Bucky…

Settling your resolve, you gripped your Beretta. You may not make it out of here, but you still might get these men home to their families, at the very least. You’d barely uttered the word “go” to the men behind you before you were taking a shot at the nearest Hydra agent on your right, getting off as many rounds as you could before gunfire rained down on you like a hailstorm. You ducked for cover under a metal table, wincing as shots flew just centimetres from your head.

“Get the scientists, I want each of them brought back ALIVE.”

That damn voice again. You cursed, peaking around from your hiding spot to see a few of the armed men abandon their post by the door to surround the scientists, who had only made it as far as an overturned table, some ten metres away from you, in the ensuing chaos.

Crap.

You made a break for it, taking out a two more assailants with some strategically placed gunfire as you went. You were almost upon the five that were closing in on your targets, when suddenly you were thrown to the floor with a rather undignified clatter. Rolling into a crouch, you looked up to find a man the size of a bear towering over you, a gleeful yet sinister smirk on his face.

“Going somewhere, little mouse?”

You snarled, launching yourself to your feet and aiming a jab at his solar plexus. The man chuckled as your fist connected, apparently not at all phased by the assault, and proceeded to headbutt you, sending you flying back to the ground.

You groaned, gripping your head as you scrambled to get back on your feet. Before you were up however, terrifyingly strong hands gripped your throat, pulling you up off the group and hanging you there like a rag-doll.

You let out a strangled cry, frantically scratching and kicking to find some reprieve from the man’s monstrous grip on you, but every time you landed a punch, he’d simply smirk, obviously enjoying your struggle.

Prick.

Just as you thought your number may be up, you were forced to stifle a scream and a knife whizzed past your skull, embedding itself deep into your attacker’s eye socket. As the man dropped to the ground, his hold on you going entirely limp, you gasped, spinning on one heel in search of your saviour, and almost passed out yourself when your eyes connected with Bucky’s.

Except, that wasn’t Bucky. That was the Winter Solider. So, what in the hell was he doing taking out Hydra agents and saving your life?

Holding your gaze in those steel blue eyes for only a second longer, the Soldier turned, taking out two approaching opponents with unnerving precision and efficiency. You were vaguely aware of shouting off to your left, and you turned just in time to see one of the scientists you were supposed to be rescuing get taken down, the other six trying, but failing, to make a stand behind him.

You shot a last, weary glance towards the Soldier, who was currently in the process of disarming and… Oh… Dismembering… The three agents who had been guarding the entrance to the back corridor.

With a grimace, you took off running. Realising in dismay that your pistol had been lost in your earlier struggle, you grabbed a nearby stool, bringing it down with all your might on the head of the agent closest to you. As their comrade went down, in unison, the four others turned to you, eyes gleaming with furious blood lust.

“My bad.” You muttered.

You shot them a smirk, your eyes twinkling with malice as you prepared yourself. However, just as the man furthest to your left moved to shoot, a knife lodged itself into he back of his hand with a dull thump. Before anyone could react, including the man himself, the Winter Soldier was upon him, metal arm lashing out to strike him in the jugular, causing the man fall uselessly to the ground.

You scowled, as the other three sprung into action, and you moved to take on the assailant directly in front of you. But before you could get within striking distance, the Soldiers grip was on your arm, tossing you backwards. You rolled over your shoulder, landing in a crouched position just behind him, shooting him an affronted glare. However, he was not looking back at you, and had already resumed his one man-wrecking crew assault on the Hydra agents that remained.

Uttering a few, choice expletives under your breath, you glanced around, gaze coming to rest on the seven terrified men huddled behind an overturned table to your right.

Oh, yeah. Your mission.

You took the opportunity to close the distance between you and your targets finally, dragging each of the men to their feet and guiding them towards the now-unoccupied exit.

“Alright, fellas. This party’s getting a little boring. What’d’ya say we blow this joint?”

The captive scientists nodded fervently in unison, helping each other to their feet as you ushered the towards the exit. As you swung the door open, you came face to face with one of the S.H.I.E.L.D agents in charge of the medevac team, staring dumbly at him for a second.

“Uh… We just thought… You guys were taking a while.” He glanced down at you warily as you raised a brow.

“Ran into some trouble, better later than never, hey?” You murmured in a honeyed tone.

The agent nodded curtly, and cleared his throat, nodding towards the men huddled behind you.

“If you’re ready, ma’am.” He muttered, turning on his heel and gesturing towards the helo, freezing as you caught his wrists in your steely grip.

“I’m not finished here. Take the hostages back to Fury, we’ll find our own way home.”

And with that, before the S.H.I.E.L.D agent could object, you gestured for the exhausted group behind you to follow him, sprinting back into the building without a moment’s hesitation.

Once inside, you surveyed the scene in front of you, tallying the bodies that littered the floor.

You counted all twelve hostiles, noting with mild apprehension that some had bullet wounds in their foreheads where none had been before.

It was at that moment that movement in the shadowy corner of the hall caught your attention, and you froze, body trembling with both adrenaline and exhaustion. You took an instinctual step back as the Winter Soldier materialised out of the darkness, his merciless gaze fixated on you.

“We should leave. More will come.” He spoke in a tone entirely void of emotion, making the hairs on the back of your neck stand on edge.

“Why should I go anywhere with you, soldat?” You challenged; arms crossed as you narrowed your eyes at the man.

Yes, he had just saved your life. But this was still the Winter Soldier, and you were anything but an optimist.

The Soldier didn’t reply. Instead, he closed the space between you so rapidly that you barely had time to flinch as he took your arm in his cold, metal grasp, dragging you after him as he moved towards the exit.

You struggled against him, frantically trying to tug your arm free, but to no avail.

“What the hell are you doing?”

No response.

“Bucky.”

Nothing.

With a growl of discontent, you opted for a new tactic.

“Zachem ty eto delayesh'?” (“Why are you doing this?”) You snarled at him venomously, causing the Soldier to stop dead in his tracks.

When he said nothing, you tried once more, your voice softening substantially on seeing the confusion in his face. It almost looked like your Bucky when you hit him with a pop culture reference.

“Kto ya dlya tebya?” (“Who am I to you?”) You whispered.

You fixed him with a pleading stare, finally ceasing your incessant attempts at escaping his grasp. The Soldier turned to face you completely, his flesh hand coming up to grip your free arm as he looked you dead in the eyes. You swore you saw a flicker of something in their inky depths.

“Vy moya missiya seychas.” (“You are my mission now.”)

His voice was still entirely expressionless, and yet his words hit you so hard you might have stumbled backwards had he not had a vice-like grip on you.

There was a moments silence as you found yourself trapped in the Soldier’s gaze. Your mind whirled to make sense of his words, and your mouth hung open uselessly, unable to muster a response.

With a sigh, your companion muttered something about finding shelter, dragging you once more behind him.

However, despite his brutish mannerisms and the fact he was still, in fact, the Winter Soldier, this time, you found yourself complying.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 

Forty-five minutes and a lot of awkward silence later, the two of you were held up in a small, abandoned barn on the outskirts of the next town over. Bucky, or rather, the Soldier, stood in the doorway, lifeless eyes scanning the horizon relentlessly. You, on the other hand, were sat a healthy distance away, lent up against a metal trough, your whole-body trembling from a combination of the dropping temperature and furious trepidation.

What in the hell were you supposed to do with this situation?

Obviously, something had gone wrong with the Soldier’s programming, and as far as you could tell, he didn’t want to kill you. Which was good. However, he was still the Winter Soldier. That was less good. The real question, was how on earth were you going to get Bucky back in the driver’s seat?

You were brought out of your heavy thoughts by black-clad legs entering your line of sight, and your eyes snapped up in shock, your body instinctively tensing.

“You’re cold.”

The Soldier’s voice held no warmth as he made his observation, his vacant eyes fixated on you. You cleared your throat, running a hand casually through your hair as you shrugged.

“I didn’t plan on making this a two-day trip, if I’d known we were camping out I’d have brought my sweats.”

His expression did not falter for even a second, and you frowned. Not that you’d expected him to break into a fit of giggles, but, geez. Tough crowd.

Instead, you watched attentively he pulled his leather jacket off, carefully ignoring the way his muscles rippled under his shirt as he did so. Without a word, he dropped the jacket over your knees, which were currently curled up to your chest. You practically purred as you tugged the jacket tighter around you, the ghost of his body heat still present on the material.

“Thanks, comrade.” You murmured, eyeing him tentatively.

He turned on his heel to return to his post but stopped short when you cleared your throat once more. By the time he turned back to face you, your arm was extended, offering him a bottle of water you had stashed in your tactical gear.

“Consider it a peace offering.” You said matter of factly.

He gave you a dubious look, the most expression you’d seen on his face all night, you noted, as you settled down against the wall to rest. Nevertheless, he took the bottle with a curt nod of appreciation, before making his way back to the doorway, taking a drink of the water as he went.

Ten seconds later, and you found yourself wincing as the Soldier’s body dropped like a sack of potatoes to the ground, water bottle discarded at his side.

You didn’t feel great about using the sedatives you kept in your medical kit on the guy. Really, you didn’t, but…

You shakily got to your feet, draping Bucky’s jacket back over him as you gave him a once over for injuries. When you were satisfied that he was unharmed from the fall, you moved a little way off, leaning against a hay-bale as you watched him through bleary, sleep-addled eyes.

“Sorry, Buck. But I can’t risk losing you.” You whispered into the darkness, shuddering as the howling wind sent a chill through your bones.

This was going to be a long night.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

The next morning, you woke from a sleep you’d never meant to have. You’d been dutifully watching over Bucky’s body all night; in case he woke from his drug-induced slumber. However, it was becoming increasingly apparent as consciousness returned to you, that at some point, you yourself had passed out.

Your breath caught in your throat as your gaze slid over to the pile of hay on which you’d left your teammates unconscious form. A pile of hay that was now unquestionably vacant.

Crap.

Within seconds, you were sprinting out of the barn, rounding off a list of expletives so colourful it’d make Cap’ blush.

Please don’t be gone, please don’t be gone, please don’t be-

You skidded to a halt as you approached the brow of the hill on which the barn was stationed, stifling a sob of relief as your eyes homed in on a familiar form sitting on the grass, his body silhouetted by the rising sun.

“Bucky?” You uttered in a breathy gasp.

His head snapped around to face you then, and as you tentatively made your way towards him, you could just about make out the tension in his shoulders, the crease in his forehead. That was Bucky alright.

“Y/N…” He murmured as you came to rest, knelt by his side.

You could see the confusion in his eyes, the worry in his clenched jaw. How long had he been out here, torturing himself over the blank pages in his memory?

“You’re awake…” You spoke slowly, almost as if in a dream. “How much do you remember…?”

Bucky swallowed hard, his gaze shifting from you to focus on the ever-rising sun, far off in the distance.

“I remember the words. Then… Nothing. What did I do?” His woeful tone made your heart ache.

You sucked in air, rubbing the back of your neck as you offered him a cautious explanation.

“Uh… Well… You kind of sort of, took out the entirety of the Hydra forces and saved my life…?”

Bucky’s head snapped back around, wide, curious eyes practically burning through your own as he processed your words.

“I… Didn’t hurt you?” He whispered, so low you had to strain to hear it.

You smiled, unable to mask the light pink hue in your cheeks at the memory. At the time, you’d almost crapped your pants. But now, after the fact, the realisation that Bucky, even under the control of Hydra, had chosen to protect you, made your chest stutter uncomfortably.

“Ah… No. The opposite in fact.”

Bucky’s face cracked with relieved, a soft smile playing on his lips, and you couldn’t help but notice how beautiful his profile looked, highlighted by the first rays of morning light. After a few minutes of comfortable silence, in which you both lost yourselves in your respective musings, you broke the stillness with a shy cough.

“Hey… Buck? When I asked you if you knew me, while you were… You know… You told me that I was your mission, what do you think you meant by that?”

Even in the blinding light of the sun’s rays, you noticed Bucky going an unmistakably bright shade of red, unable to meet your gaze. He turned his head away from you, studiously focusing on the scenery in front of him in mutinous silence. You let out a breath of dismay, scooting your body around his tensed form to kneel in from of him, crouching on the balls of your feet and forcing him to look at you.

“Bucky?” You called to him in a gentle, yet insistent tone.

You’re not shutting me out, Mr. Barnes. Not today.

He grunted in response, still unable to meet your incessant stare, but you noticed his features soften as he let out a sigh of defeat.

“I… Guess I wanted to protect you. Even then.” He confessed in a barely-there whisper.

You swallowed. Hard.

“But how? Why? With your mind under their control-”

“There’s forces stronger than Hydra’s science in this world, Y/N.” The uncertainty in his voice had all but vanished as he cut you off, replaced by candour that made your heart do that strange, fluttery thing again.

He finally brought his eyes away from the view behind you to meet your gaze with such sincerity, such intensity, that you found yourself unable to move, unable to speak, or even think. In that moment, there was only Bucky.

When you finally forced your mouth to summon an admittedly limited choice in words, your voice was distinctly horse.

“Like… What?”

Bucky held your gaze, his metal hand tenderly moving to grasp your flesh one, his cheeks flushed crimson. Despite his obvious reticence, there was no hesitation in his eyes as he spoke in a low, gravelly tone.

“Like being madly in love with the best person you know.”

After a beat, your mouth dropped open, eyes wide. All you could do was gawk at him then, totally floored by the declaration.

Surely, he didn’t mean you?

Surely Steve was more qualified for the moniker of ‘best person Bucky knows’?

Surely-

“I’m talking about you, dumbass.”

Bucky flashed you a wry smile, apparently reading your thoughts. You remained stock-still, your mind struggling so hard to process what you were being told, you could have sworn you heard the dial-up internet noise from within its depths.

Bucky Barnes was in love with you. Bucky. Your mission partner. Your best friend. Your… Your…

Almost as if under a spell, you found your body lurching forward of its own accord, your lips crushing against Bucky’s so hard you were sure you’d bruise. It would not have surprised you if fireworks had appeared on the horizon in that moment, for the joy, passion and sheer bliss that exploded in your core at the sensation of Bucky’s lips against yours.

After a moment of stunned pause, Bucky’s senses seemed to return to him, as he eagerly caught your waist in his sturdy grasp, pulling you weightlessly into his lap so that your legs straddled him. The hand that had been holding your own trailed up your arm, coming to rest tangled in the hair at the nape of your neck, pulling you closer into his embrace, and you responded by snaking your arms around his shoulders, nails digging lightly into his back as lips gave way to tongues, and you and Bucky lost yourselves in each other.

When you were finally forced to pull apart for need of oxygen, you were both lightly panting, lips swollen and bruised and eyes heavy-lidded with passion. You rested your forehead against his own as Bucky rubbed light circles into your back, a warm smile crossing his lips.

“What was that for?” He whispered to you, his voice thick with desire.

You grinned, pulling away ever-so-slightly to meet his tender gaze.

“Well, I could have just told you I love you, too. But you know, actions speak louder and all that…”

Bucky let out a low chuckle, leaning up to press a light kiss to your forehead, making you grin as your cheeks reddened. This was crazy, to be sitting like this, doing this, with Bucky. And yet, nothing had ever felt more natural to you.

You gave a reluctant sigh, clearing your throat as you murmured to him.

“You know we should probably start heading back-…”

You trailed off, losing your sentence in confusion as Bucky slid one hand easily under your thigh, holding you against him as he stood and began to make his way back towards the barn.

“Uh… Bucky… What are you doing?”

He smiled then, the way Lucifer might have smiled before being cast out of heaven, before he playfully landed a kiss on your jaw, making your stomach flutter deliciously.

“If actions speak louder, then let me show you just how much I love you, every inch of you, inside and out, in fact.” He murmured against your ear, the warm tickle of his breath making your spine tingle.

You bit your lip, tangling your hands in his hair as Bucky’s teasing lips trailed from your jaw to your neck, and back up. After a moment of divine torture, storm blue eyes found yours, and you and Bucky gazed adoringly at one another. A silent promise was uttered between you, as the dimness of the barn consumed you both, that this marked the first day of a new beginning.

[cake-writes]

Compromise (Part One)

Pairing: Bucky x Reader

Chapter Warnings: Mom!Reader, Dad!Bucky, Ex-Relationship, Co-Parenting Drama, Angst, Fluff

Summary:  You didn’t want to trust him again, because every time you did, Bucky broke your heart just a little more. Deep down, though, you wanted to get along with him. You wanted to be amicable. You wanted your daughter to know her father. You’d always wanted that. It just required a compromise.

I really don’t need to be working on yet another WIP but here I am, like a clown!

It all started with some of the best sex you’d ever had in your life. You know the kind: rough and desperate. Needy. Passionate. The kind straight out of a romance novel, blazing hot and full of love. The kind that, even four years later, served as inspiration for your fantasies – even if you despised the man responsible.

No, that was a lie. You didn’t despise him. You just wished that you did.

It made your toes curl then, and the memory of it still did, even now. The only difference was that you used a toy. That was all you could do, because in between your job managing a small café and your three-year-old daughter’s care, you had zero time for dating. You were Winnie’s mother and primary caregiver, because of course you were. 

Her father was the Winter Soldier, after all.

The two of you split when Winnie was just thirteen months old. Unsurprisingly, the court didn’t give Bucky custody, not when so much of his past was bound by red tape. You knew that it wasn’t his fault, the things he’d done, but you were still surprised he’d gotten anything at all. Not only was Avenging a dangerous line of work, but it was the exact reason why you’d left.

He only got to see her once a month, with supervised visits – visits that were much harder on you than on your daughter, but you put on a brave face just for her. Maybe some small part of it was for yourself, too. You were still in love with him – or with the idea of him, you weren’t sure anymore, but the fact remained that he chose his work over his new family out of some misguided idea of making up for the awful things he’d done.

He chose Steve. He chose Sam. He chose his past over his present.

Not you.

The visits were difficult, but manageable – when he even managed to show up, of course. It was about fifty-fifty whether or not he’d show, usually because of work and he often tried to reschedule last minute, which you eventually started to refuse. You and Winnie had a set schedule, and you’d be damned if you deviated from it because of him and his neverending excuses.

You did try, once. You tried to work with him, tried to empathize – at least until he rescheduled three Saturdays in a row and Winnie’s poor little heart shattered to pieces. She was inconsolable for weeks, and needless to say, you stopped trying after that. He didn’t deserve it, not when he hurt your young daughter so easily.

Your usual meet-up place was the small park near your house. There wasn’t much else around, anyway, not like inner city Manhattan which you so desperately missed. You couldn’t afford to live there on your meagre barista salary, so you moved shortly after your trainwreck of a break-up. Moving caused an even bigger rift between you and Bucky, one only worsened by heated arguments and nasty words.

Upstate was where you moved, about three hours away from the city.

Upstate was where Bucky was living now, too, about fifteen minutes from your home.

He broke the news during an impromptu lunchtime visit to your café, one you especially did not appreciate due to the fact that he’d shown up at your workplace. It was almost like he’d known you wouldn’t be able to leave, as you so often did when he tried to talk to you about anything. You always put on a smile for your daughter when you dealt with him, but she wasn’t here and you had no reason to be nice.

The mug in front of you sat untouched as you stared down at the coffee within, delicate latte art slowly melting away while you processed what he’d just said. He was going to be just a few miles down the road at the new Avengers facility, and though he didn’t say it outright, the implication was enough: he could come here anytime he wanted to; could pick Winnie up from preschool anytime he wanted to; could see her anytime he wanted to, court order be damned.

You’d been reduced to nothing more than a barrier keeping him away from his daughter – your daughter – and it stung. Then again, that was what you’d become. That was what you’d been forced to become, because of him. 

A barrier. 

A bitch.

“I want to see her more,” he told you, but his cordial tone did nothing to hide the thinly-veiled threat. “It’s been years since the last agreement. Things are different now.”

Don’t make me get a lawyer was what he meant.

What’s worse was that you knew he was right. He’d been cleared of all charges, and although his work wasn’t exactly ideal for childrearing, he earned much more money than you did. Not only that, but with the compound right down the road, there was no way he’d be denied this time. If the two of you went back to court, he’d get joint custody. Fifty-fifty. Equal. You knew it, and he did, too. He was forcing your hand.

“You barely make it to your monthly visits as it is,” you responded evenly, though inside you were about ready to scream. “How are things different, Bucky?”

“I’m close by. We’re training more Avengers, so my hours are flexible. I’ve already talked to Steve.”

Why couldn’t he have talked to Steve two years ago?

“I can show you around the compound, if that’s what you want. It’s better than the tower.”

You remembered the tower. You hated the tower. It was no place to raise a child, what with all the missions and the parties and the late-night take-offs which constantly woke Winnie from her sleep. The one good thing it had going for it was the security.

Somehow, he’d remembered your gripes. You couldn’t decide if you should be flattered or not.

“I’ve even got a spare bedroom for her now, sweetheart. Can’t we make this work?”

“Don’t call me that,” you finally snapped, to which Bucky held his hands up in a show of surrender. He didn’t offer an apology, but then again, you didn’t want one. You didn’t want any of this.

Except maybe you did.

You chewed your lower lip, coffee now long forgotten in favour of worrying about the future. You didn’t want to trust him again, because every time you did, he broke your heart just a little more.

Deep down, though, you wanted to get along with him. You wanted to be amicable. You wanted your daughter to know her father. 

You’d always wanted that.

And if you didn’t, then the next step would be a lawyer. You didn’t have the time or the money for another custody battle, whereas Bucky had plenty of both and he certainly had no qualms about going down that route. This visit was just a last-ditch effort before he did.

“Fine,” you acquiesced through grit teeth, “but I want to see it first.”

“Yeah?” he asked, blue eyes wide with surprise.

For a moment, you were rendered speechless. God, you hadn’t seen him look at you like that in years. The last time probably would have been when you told him that you were pregnant with Winnie. 

Even now, you were still so weak for him. You always managed to stay strong for your daughter, but never for yourself. You missed him, and, well, it wasn’t like you had a choice in the matter either way.

“Yeah,” you repeated, reluctant and hollow.

That weekend, you found yourself staring up at the gates to the compound in awe through the windshield of your small beater. The compound was indeed much larger than the tower had been; you couldn’t see much from the road, but there was plenty of acreage. Plenty of room for Winnie to run around and play, almost, if it wasn’t practically a military base.

When you pushed a button, the CCTV camera came to life, whirring as it likely zoomed in your faces through the side windows of your car. “Ma’am, this is the Avengers Facility. You might have the wrong—”

You abruptly interrupted him with your name, followed by, “And this is Winnifred Barnes. B-A-R-N-E-S.”

There was a long pause, then, as the guy on the other end seemed to realize who you were. Then he had an immediate change of tone. “Oh, that’s— that’s today! Right! I’m so sorry, ma’am!”

Ugh. You weren’t old enough to be a ‘ma’am.’ 

Were you?

After the gate started to open, you slowly made your way up the long driveway, humming quietly to yourself to calm your nerves. That was when Winnie started to sing along with you, the same off-key tune that the two of you often sang together in the bathtub. She’d never been a fan of baths, so you used the song as a distraction. Now it was supposed to be your distraction, but it didn’t work very well.

You parked next to a small fleet of shiny black cars with tinted windows, feeling just as out of place now as you did when you and Bucky were dating. You’d always made coffee for a living, while he was… him. How you even managed to make it work for nearly two years was beyond you, as brief and fleeting as your whirlwind romance had been.

“Is Daddy here?” Winnie asked excitedly, peering out the windows at the large complex of buildings. Her breath fogged up the glass and you couldn’t help but laugh a little.

“Yes, baby,” you told her as you got out of the car and slung your purse over one shoulder, before you opened her car door. “Daddy’s here. We’ll see him soon.”

She bounced happily as you unbuckled her from her car seat, and then you hoisted her up onto one hip and shut the door with your free hand. After that, you slowly made your way up the steps to what you assumed was the main building.

Christ, this place was massive.

Just before you got to the top, the glass double doors up ahead were shoved open and there was Bucky in all his glory – tall and muscular, just like always, albeit almost out of breath. His hair was pulled back into a loose, messy bun, strands of hair framing his face in the familiar way you’d always loved, and the stubble on his face nearly made you swoon.

You hated that you were still attracted to him.  

“Sorry, we’re a little early,” you admitted, nodding to your daughter. “Someone wanted to see you.”

As if on cue, Winnie shouted, “Daddy!” and reached out for him with her little arms, making grabby hands in his direction. She was so eager that you might have dropped her once, but you were used to her excitement.

Bucky met your eyes for a moment with a note of appreciation before he turned to her. Then and only then did the corners of his eyes crinkle up in a genuine smile – one directed at your daughter, not at you, one not meant to keep up a charade like the two of you were wont to do. That was the only type of smile he offered you, and that hurt, too.

“How’s my best girl?” he cooed, peppering her face with noisy kisses.

She giggled and half-heartedly tried to push him away. “Daddy, no! It’s scratchy!” 

At that, he just rubbed his stubbly cheek against hers some more, lightly, not enough to hurt, and she squealed. He slid his hands under her arms with ease before he lifted her up and away from you, and although you knew he wasn’t being malicious, you always hated giving her up.

She just slung her tiny arms around his neck and buried her face in his shoulder. It had been awhile since she’d seen him – probably about two months, now, and you didn’t blame her. You’d missed him, too.

“How was the drive?” he asked you, holding Winnie against his side as the three of you made your way inside. With his free hand, he held open the glass door for you.

“It was a whole twelve minutes,” you responded dryly, more joking than not. Twelve minutes was much better than the nearly three-hour commute from when he was living in the city; not that you had to make it very often, as it was usually his responsibility. “Not too bad. Thanks.”

You weren’t really sure what you were thanking him for. The door, maybe.

Bucky paused to study your face for a moment, hesitant, before he quickly lifted Winnie up onto his shoulders, adorable peals of laughter escaping her. The ceilings were tall enough to offer plenty of leeway, and she’d always enjoyed being able to see things from such a high vantage point, especially someplace new like this. 

“I bet Auntie Nat will be so happy to see you, sweetpea,” you told her, more to fill the silence than anything else. Bucky sure looked like he wanted to say something to you. He had that same reluctant expression on his face, the very one that creased his brows and made your anxiety skyrocket.  

Thankfully, he seemed to understand that you weren’t willing to discuss whatever it was yet, and instead chimed in, “She’s waiting for us upstairs, princess. Do you wanna go see her?”

“Yeah!” Winnie sounded incredibly chipper as she gripped two handfuls of Bucky’s hair in her small fists, almost like the reigns to a horse. “Let’s go!”

You stifled a laugh as she half-directed him where to go. The stairs were steeper than you anticipated, and by the time you reached the next floor, you were well and truly winded. The second flight was even worse; they were both already at the top by the time you got halfway there, because Bucky took them two or three at a time.

“Come on, Mommy!” Winnie cheered.  

“I’m coming, baby,” you called out, holding onto the handrail for dear life. That wasn’t an exaggeration.

One step, two, then three and you finally made it there. It wasn’t that you were out of shape, exactly – except, well, you were. You’d never completely lost the extra weight that came along with having a child, and you definitely didn’t have the time to work out with all of your other responsibilities as much as you would have liked to.

Bucky’s eyes were soft on yours when you glanced over at him, to which you huffed and quickly looked away. Knowing he’d seen how out of shape you were was embarrassing enough.

“Where’s Auntie Nat?” Winnie asked, then, and you were never more grateful to her for it.

“She’s making lunch for us,” Bucky told her, gently placing a hand on your lower back to guide you in the right direction. When you froze up at the unexpected contact, he immediately pulled it away, like he’d only just realized what he’d done.

If your heart wasn’t already racing, it certainly would have been after that.

“How’s that sound, Win? Are you hungry?” you asked as the three of you walked into the large kitchen and living area. The open floor plan was full of expensive things you’d only ever dreamt of, no doubt courtesy of Tony.

“Yeah!” she responded happily, which soon became an excited shriek when she spotted Natasha spreading peanut butter onto a few slices of bread. On the marble countertop in front of her was also a jar of strawberry jam, Winnie’s favourite.

“Hi Winnie,” Natasha greeted. “Guess what I’m making?”

“Peanut butter jellies!” Winnie exclaimed, wiggling a little, clearly ready to get off of Bucky’s shoulders to properly say hi to Natasha. Predictably, he plopped her onto the floor with ease, and she did just that. The sound of her scampering across the unfamiliar tile brought a smile to your face. It almost sounded like home.

Natasha kept her entertained while you and Bucky watched in tense, uncomfortable silence. If nothing else, you were glad that Winnie was able to spend some time with her two favourite people. You, of course, weren’t one of them. You weren’t the fun parent. Bucky was.

“I’m sorry about the other day,” he said, then, softly enough that Winnie couldn’t hear.

You didn’t look at him, instead focusing on what was on the other side of the room: the two black leather sofas surrounding a large flat-screen TV mounted to the wall, with a lavish coffee table in front. All you noticed were the sharp corners and invisible price tags. You weren’t broke, exactly, but all of this was much nicer than you could afford.

“Don’t be,” you replied with a shrug. “She’d be over the moon if we had such a big TV at home.”

“I’m happy to give you more,” Bucky said, crossing his arms. “Why am I not surprised you’re still driving that car?”

At that, you shot him a look that clearly conveyed your displeasure, to which he met your eyes in challenge.

You didn’t want more money from him. You only accepted the bare minimum of child support because it was court-ordered, and even that was a blow to your pride. You and Winnie were managing just fine without the ridiculous sum of money that Bucky made whilst working with the Avengers.

“It still runs. Why would I get rid of it?”

“It’s not as safe as the newer models,” Bucky responded far too evenly for your liking. “You know that. Are you really going to let your pride get in the way of our daughter’s safety?”

“She’s fine,” you hissed. “Are you really going to do this right now?”

“Mommy? What’s wrong?” came your sweet little girl’s voice, then, and your bristly demeanour disappeared in an instant. You always did your best not to argue with Bucky in front of her, but every now and then he just had to push your buttons. This was one of those times.

“Nothing, honey,” you said with faux cheerfulness, walking over to the counter where she was now seated, jam smeared all over her cheeks and chin. “Mommy’s just hungry, that’s all. Can I please have a bite?”

Winnie just beamed and held out one half of her sandwich to you. That was when you noticed that Natasha had lovingly cut it into triangles, just as she always did, and your smile suddenly felt more real than it had in days.

After you took a bite, you brushed Winnie’s soft brown locks away from her forehead and left a kiss there. “Thank you. Now be a good girl for Auntie Nat, okay? Mommy and Daddy will be back soon.”

“Okay, Mommy,” she said so sweetly, you couldn’t help but give her another kiss. Then you shared a warning look with Natasha – almost as if to say keep her out of this – before you walked back over to Bucky.

Together, the two of you went back out into the hallway to finish the argument he started. You were already ready to rip his head off after his unexpected visit-slash-threat earlier in the week, not to mention the snide comment he’d just made about your ability to parent.

The moment the door shut behind you, you were in full attack mode, zero to sixty in no time whatsoever. “Damn it, how many times do I have to tell you not to pick a fight in front of her?”

“Well, maybe if you were more reasonable—”

“More reasonable? Maybe if you made an effort to actually show up every once in a while—”

“What the hell do you think I’m trying to do here, sweetheart? She’s three and I’ve barely seen her!”

“And whose fault is that?” you spat, jabbing your finger into his chest for emphasis, “You’re the one who’s always working, Bucky! You know how excited she gets, and whenever you let her down, I’m the one who has to try and make her feel better! I’m the one making promises you can’t keep!”

Bucky exhaled slowly, then, in a clear attempt to calm down. The two of you never used to fight like this, but ever since you moved away, things had been beyond tense and you’d long since been forced to recognize when he really was trying to control his temper.

Of course, things weren’t always so bad. There were days where both of you were at least somewhat amicable towards each other, maybe even friendly. In fact, this one seemed like it might have been heading in that direction – in the beginning, at least.

Then he finally spoke again, tone clipped, “Let me show you her room.”

Yeah, like seeing whatever he had in store would suddenly make you forget the last three years. 

“Fine.”

Bucky led the way down a winding corridor on the same floor as the communal kitchen. You guessed that each floor probably had its own. The building itself was large and expensive as hell, more than anything you’d ever be able to afford. Just being here almost felt like a privilege.

You hated it. What you hated more was that you liked it. For Winnie, anyway. She deserved the world.

The door to Bucky’s apartment opened with a fingerprint scan, because of course it did. The technology reminded you of your shared suite in the tower once upon a time. 

The apartment wasn’t anything impressive, more of a bachelor pad than anything, but at least it was clean. A grey suede sofa was the focal point, across from another large TV. Boys and their toys, you supposed. At least the coffee table in here had no sharp edges. 

On the other side there was a small kitchenette – big enough for one person, but not necessarily two. Then again, Winnie didn’t eat nearly as much as an adult so that wasn’t really a problem.

Down the hallway, you spotted three doors: one on the left, one on the right, and one at the end. Bathroom, spare room, and his room. At least, that was what you assumed.

You were right.

The second you opened the door to the spare bedroom, your breath hitched in your throat. It wasn’t overly pink or girly like Winnie’s room at home, but you could immediately picture her living here. Not all of the time, because you did still want primary custody, but it was evident that Bucky had put a lot of thought and effort into this.  

There was a twin bed up against one of the walls, with a small guardrail to prevent her from rolling onto the floor – just like at home, where she’d only recently moved into a big girl bed. The sheets were a delicate lavender, and the duvet matched perfectly, white and purple gingham print. At the foot of the bed was a grey fleece blanket, which you absentmindedly brushed your fingers against as you took everything in.

In one of the corners was a small white desk and chair, and on top of it was a stack of children’s books. She hadn’t yet learned how to read, not really, but she loved being read to at bedtime. As you skimmed through the stack, you noticed that a lot of the books were her favourites.

Then you spotted the stuffed animals.

There were a bunch of them, with tags in an assortment of languages. You didn’t even have to look to know that they were from different countries. Bucky must have been saving them for a while. He already knew you had too many at your house as it was; you’d ripped him a new one for it once already, because he liked to bring Winnie one whenever he got back from a mission. You had so many now that they covered her bed, and then some.

He still was picking them up on his missions, it looked like. He just hadn’t given them to her yet.

When you turned back to him, you found him leaning against the doorframe with a hopeful look on his face.

“How long—” Your voice broke, then, and you cleared your throat in an attempt to sound like you weren’t about to cry. It didn’t work. “How long have you been collecting these?”

“Over a year,” he admitted, rubbing the back of his neck sheepishly as he nodded to the room itself. “Do you think she’ll like it?”

You let out a shaky breath, willing yourself not to cry in front of him. That didn’t work either.

“Oh, Bucky,” you sniffled. “She’ll love it.”

He hesitantly pushed off the doorframe when he noticed you were upset. “Are you crying?”

“No,” you blubbered, burying your teary face in your hands before he could get a good look.

Bucky wanted to be there for your daughter. At last.

You were beyond touched by all the work that had gone into this, and although you weren’t happy about his unspoken threat of legal action, you could finally see why. He cared about her. He cared about her just as much as you did. He just didn’t show it as well.

The way Bucky wrapped his arms around you was gentle, unsure, but when you leaned into him his hold on you tightened just a little. It had been far too long since you’d been held, for one, and for two, god it felt good to be held by him. You’d forgotten what it felt like to be in his arms. 

You’d missed it – missed him.

That might have been why you finally managed to swallow your pride and ask, muffled and teary, “What car has the best safety features?”

When he pulled away just enough to look at you, he gave you a smile, the same kind where his eyes crinkled at the corners. 

It was genuine.

Part Two / Master List

[lailannajacobs]

Heart to a Gunfight - Chapter Three

Pairing: Bucky x fem!Reader

Summary: You didn’t want to help Bucky Barnes make it through the party by pretending to be his fake girlfriend, after all, you had just met him. You also didn’t plan on the charade lasting as long as it did. 

Warnings: Just a lot of fluff! 

Word Count: 1.5k 

A/N: Finally found inspiration for the rest of this series, hoping the next parts will come quickly! Excited to know what you think! <3 

Previously: 

Wrapping an arm around her waist, he pulled her in close, their bodies lined up from their feet to the top of her shoulder, “You said you don’t care if we win or lose. Well how about we try and give Steve and Peggy a run for their money.”

She tilted her head to look up into his eyes, “That’s never going to happen, but I think we can definitely come in before Kira and Brad.”

Chapter Three

His lips pulled into a small smile that, for the first time all night, didn’t look like it was completely forced. Maybe a little uncertain, but at least slightly more genuine. It wasn’t a bad look on him.

“Steady rhythm.” He affirmed.

“That’s your great plan to win?” You asked with a raised brow. “Steady rhythm?”

He nodded and pulled you closer, “As long as we take our steps in sync, there’s nothing else to this.”

“And you know this because you’ve done a lot of three-legged races or because it’s the most obvious strategy in the world?”

All amusement vanished from his face, “Your sass isn’t going to help”

You almost mentioned that if it was keeping him from thinking about his ex-fiancé then it was helping more than he realized, but you kept your mouth shut. Bringing her up now would only destroy the little progress you had made in getting him forget about her presence. Having to keep Barnes occupied should have annoyed you, but it was a good distraction on an otherwise boring night, so you didn’t mind helping him out. If you were being honest, no one deserved to be stuck with their ex without a wingman to help and that had softened your irritation a little.

“So, what’s your strategy for a steady rhythm, Soldier? A one-two count?”

He opened his mouth and shut it again like you had stolen the words from him. When he stayed silent, you realized you had.

“How original.” You said dryly.

He glared at you, his sour mood returning. You were beginning to think it was his default look. “Do you have any other helpful remarks to add, Speedy?”

“Yeah. Stop calling me Speedy.”

He smirked, “Okay, Doll.”

“That’s no better.” You snarled.

“Deal with it.”

“Everyone ready?” The best man’s shout broke through the air, interrupting your next sarcastic retort.

A few whoops sounded from the other players in the line but the two of you remained silent, steeling yourselves for the child’s game you got roped into because of Bucky’s pride. You were about to remind him of that fact when he spoke up.

“So, on one we move our joint foot and on two we move our free foot. Got it?”

“Yeah, yeah.” You nodded with a sharp sigh, “Don’t forget we need to match the length of our strides too.”

He glanced down at you, a funny look on his face. You raised a brow.

“Right.” He mumbled, the arm around your waist pulling you in closer and enveloping you in his warmth.

You looked down the line and noticed Steve and Peggy staring stoically at the finish line, and a laugh bubbled out. You definitely pitied the poor suckers that were stuck those two. Their competitive nature was barely more controlled than a tornado and you didn’t want to be anywhere near them if they got physical.

Barely in your line of vision, you felt Kira’s eyes on you, and your gaze slid over to meet hers. She arched a perfectly plucked eyebrow and you grinned, waggling your fingers at her. Brad, noting the movement, waved back, an excited look on his face. At least one person was excited to be here.

You brought your attention back to Bucky before he began to look for the person you had been waving too, “Ready, Soldier?”

“Doll.” He drew out the word as if you had asked a ridiculous question, “Are you?”

You grit your teeth. “That’s not my name.”

He smirked.

“Not like you know what it actually it.”

The look fell and before he could try to prove you wrong - doubtful - the best man announced the start of the race. Both of you moved the wrong foot at the same time, almost sending each other crashing to the ground. His fingertips pressed into your side, grip tightening as he righted you.

“One” He growled, his voice was a deep command you felt compelled to follow, so you did.

Following the sound of his voice and moving in time with him, you could tell by the pressure on your waist that he had taken the lead and was in full control. Tightening your grip around his wide torso, you looked down at the ground to better match his strides. To your surprise, and despite your rocky start, the two of you moved in perfect rhythm as if you had been doing this since you were kids. You couldn’t help but smile.

When you looked up, you realized Peggy and Steve had already crossed the finish line, but Kira and Brad were only a few feet in front of you. You were about to tell Bucky to pick up the pace, but he must have noticed them at the same time and had quickened his counting. He was counting so fast you were afraid the two of you were going to topple over trying to keep up with his brutal pace, but you weren’t about to be the reason he didn’t beat Kira so you followed suit.

The two of you kept pushing even when your steps no longer felt even, gaining on them until you were neck in neck. The finish line was a few feet away and you kept your eyes on the prize, beginning to think that you were actually about to win. Just as you were about to pass them, you felt your feet go out from under you and you closed your eyes, bracing yourself for the impact of the fall. Only the hard grass never came. Apart from the uncomfortable strain in your left leg, the fall hadn’t hurt at all.

The only thing you could see when you opened your eyes were his blue-green ones, alight with more life than you had seen all evening. You were lost for a moment, mesmerized by the look.

“I think that’s on you” He chuckled.

“Me?” You found yourself laughing despite trying to put on a serious face, “I was just following your lead, Sergeant.”

The corner of his mouth was turned up in a lopsided smirk, “Whoever told you to do that was probably an idiot.”

“Yeah,” you murmured, “He probably was.”

“That’s second place for us.” Kira’s chirpy voice announced.

Bucky cleared his throat, “We should untie ourselves now.”

“Okay,” You nodded, “Help me up?”

He cocked his head, “You don’t seem like the kind of person to ask for help.”

“I’m not,” You whispered, brushing his hair aside as if the two of you were talking about something far more romantic, “But I figured your girlfriend would. And, you know, I’m not usually tied to the person.”

“Excuses, excuses.”

You shook your head at the playful grin on his lips and he rolled you gently off of him, the two of you sitting up. As you were about to untie the bind around your legs his hand found yours.

“I got it.”

Shrugging, you looked up and found Peggy and Steve grinning at the two of you.

“What place did we get?” You asked.

Peggy opened her mouth to answer but Kira interrupted, “last.”

“What? How?”

“Well,” Peggy shot you a weak smile, “You fell just before the line so technically you haven’t finished the race yet.”

Peggy’s words solidified the smug look on Kira’s face as she cuddled in closer to Brad. You wanted to wipe the look off her face, but there was nothing you could do about it now.

“Well, that’s a bummer.” You said as lightheartedly as possible, coming to a stand.

You looked around for Bucky, but he was still sitting on the grass, staring up at you.

“First or last, Speedy, as long as we’re crossing that line together, I don’t care about the rest.”

A collective aww sounded and you realized most of the wedding party had seen your fall and had stayed to watch the rest of the scene afterwards. You smiled, impressed - though you hoped the crowd thought it was love. The spark in his eye seemed to ask you who was pulling the team now.

He tilted his head, “Help me up?”

You laughed and almost rolled your eyes at him, extending your hand, “What would you do without me?”

“God only knows,” He stood so that the two of you were now mere inches apart, and whispered so that only you could hear, “You’ve got some catching up to do, Doll.”

He looped your arm through his and the two of you took the last step together over the line. The crowd erupted into cheers, but the sound didn’t drown out the echo of his taunt, ringing in your ears. Turning to face him, you pressed another quick peck to his lips, that at least this time, didn’t leave him staring at you with confusion written all over his face. Instead, there was only silent challenge.

Looking past him, you noticed Kira standing with her arms crossed, her lips pinched as if having bit into something sour. You snuggled in closer, starting to think that maybe this night wouldn’t be as excruciating as you thought it might be.

[greetjk]

Ironfam Whump/Angst Fic Recs

Here is a masterlist of some of my all-time favorite whump/angst Spider-Man fics! If anyone is looking for some good reads while in quarantine, here you go! Be sure to read the tags and warnings associated with each story, because many of them have potentially triggering or sensitive subject matter. Read safe!!

CHAPTERED FICS

A Parent Apparent by happyaspie (446k+, ongoing)  

Where Tony and Peter’s relationship grows into more of a father/son relationship after an accident involving Aunt May (who lives).

Identity Theft by KitCat992 (244k+)

It's been months since the events of Civil War, and the Avengers are doing their best to remain a team, having promised to forgive and forget. Unfortunately for them, Tony Stark's latest invention has been stolen and recovering it causes tension to reappear.

Meanwhile, in Queens, Peter Parker has two main priorities on his plate �� complete his midterm finals, and track down a fishbowl wearing criminal that may or may not lead him right into the hands of the Avengers.

Somehow between all of this, Spider-man's identity is revealed to the Avengers, Steve and Tony's friendship may permanently be damaged due to continued hidden secrets, and Happy struggles to buy a youth-sized casket for Peter's funeral.

Things were a lot easier when they were fighting over Bucky Barnes.

The Third Option by Uncertainty_Principle (200k+) 

Ben and May divorced before Peter’s parents died, so when Ben is murdered Peter goes into foster care. It takes just a tiny taste of superpowers for Peter to decide he doesn’t want to put up with his horrible foster father anymore—the streets are infinitely more appealing. All he wants is to be Spider-Man anyway.

So he leaves.

Simple.

Simple, that is, until Iron Man needs Spider-Man’s help. Peter isn’t about to turn down an opportunity to fight alongside Tony Freaking Stark, but he also isn’t going to let his hero know that his recruit is a fifteen-year-old homeless dropout. So they strike a deal. Peter will help Tony. In return, the mask stays on.

And that’s when things get complicated.

ever in your favor by iron_spider (153k+)

Peter startles awake when someone shakes him.

“Sorry, honey,” May says. Peter blinks a couple times and she comes into focus, her hair pulled back from her face. She’s trying not to look a certain way, but he can see it in her eyes anyway. She clears her throat, keeps talking. “But it’s…” She glances away, wets her lips. “You gotta get ready.”

He remembers what day it is, and his heart beats like a drum at someone’s execution. But he tries to put on a mask, make it all seem normal. It’s everything but, despite the fact that he’s been dealing with reaping day since he was born, between himself, Ben and May. That fear that one of them could be taken away. Sent to surefire slaughter. But now Ben is gone, taken despite never having his name drawn from a bowl, and May’s finally safe. Now Peter’s name is in there alone. The last Parker sitting on the chopping block. He doesn’t know how to be. He doesn’t know what normal is, when the Hunger Games are looming on the horizon.

I Never Knew I was Broken by GotMyInkPen (111k+, ongoing) 

Peter Parker has been living in HYDRA ever since his parents died at age four. All he can remember are the lesson's HYDRA taught him and a series of words that strike fear into his heart. The only thing driving him forward are the memories of meeting his hero The Winter Soldier when he was seven and the goal to one day be as great an assassin as him.

At age sixteen Peter finds himself tangled in the lives of the Avengers and can't help but wonder if there's more to life than what he's been told.

Tony wants to help him, no matter what.

In the Home by aloneintherain (68k+)

The Avengers have been infected, turned violent and aggressive against their will. And Peter, the only one unaffected, is trapped inside the Tower with six feral teammates.

“Natasha,” Peter says cautiously, “what happened here? Steve attacked me, and if there was ever a sign that something was wrong, it’s having the embodiment of Truth, Justice, and the American Way throw you across the room—”

Natasha comes closer, her stride controlled. Nothing necessarily out of the ordinary, but there’s something in her face, in her eyes—

Natasha lunges across the space, and slams into Peter, hard.

Promotions Aren't Always A Good Thing by Svn_f1ower (67k+) 

"When Peter was almost thirteen, May met Carter."

"Not too many months after Carter moved in, May got a promotion at work."

When May gets a new boyfriend, Peter's okay. When Carter moves in, he can deal. When May gets a promotion so she works days and Carter works nights, Peter finds it harder to deal. When Carter starts abusing him, he begins to feel crushed by the weight of it all.

Archetype by Bean_reads_fanfic (57k+)

Tony knows something is up when the research of ex-Hydra agents gets recycled in an underground Oscorp lab… what he doesn’t expect is the boy in a hospital gown sticking to the ceiling; or, how said boy proceeds to imprint on him like a baby duckling (a poor decision on his part, really). Did he mention he wasn’t intending on bringing home a kid that day?

Filling the Gaps by ironfamjam (53k+)

Tony looked at him, bold and true and utterly sincere, “Kid, I’m on your side, no matter what.”

Like most good things, it started with an accident.

Well, kinda.

This is a story about how a snarky, emotionally stunted genius became more than a mentor and how a just-trying-to-figure-it-out, doing his best superkid became the son he never had. No matter how empty our hearts are, love can always fill the gaps.

There’s a hole in my head and my words are falling out by wolfpuppypiles (30k+)

Tony’s stomach clenched into a knot at the sudden cut off of Peters' voice because he hadn’t trailed off, no his word had been strangled before a groan and crash sounded from the other side of the door.

Steve jumped in fright at the crash and Tony’s stomach curled tighter at the heavy thump of something hitting the carpet. Something like Peter.

let’s kick it by CivilBores (28k+)

Tony and Peter’s relationship becomes strained after the events of Infinity War. When a mysterious alien gas infects Peter with a strange disease, they realize they need to pull themselves together or risk losing everything.

For Pete’s Sake! by KitCat992 (26k+)

Maybe he’d feel better if he closed his eyes, just for a second. It was too dark to see anything clearly anyway, and he’d be able to concentrate better without seeing how fast the ground was coming up to meet him.

A rush of wind sent goosebumps across his skin before two strong hands gripped his shoulders tightly, keeping him upright and from nose-diving straight into the alleyway cement.

Peter snapped his eyes open, blinking a couple times to clear his vision. Everything was blurry. Was that…?

“...ice cream man!?”

how can the body die? (you tell me, everything) by madasthesea (8k+)

Tony felt panic creep up his spine. Something was occurring to him, slowly percolating in the back of his mind.

“You said the stinger got you. Is Scorpion’s stinger venomous?”

“I don’t—” Peter cut off as he groaned, the muscles in his jaw tight. “I don’t know. He upgraded—he was faster. Bigger. I—I thought I could beat him.”

beam me up, mr. chewbacca by iron_spider (6k)

“It’s 4:58 in the morning,” Karen says. “Your morning alarm is set to ring at seven. By the time you make it home, you will not have much time to sleep. Less than an hour, and that’s only if you fall asleep immediately.” Peter hums to himself, blinking blearily. “I’ll go to sleep, it’s fine.” “And you have the Macbeth report due tomorrow,” Karen says. “Two thousand words, of which you have written...six.” “Oh shit,” Peter gasps, his heart jumping in his chest. “Okay, I’m not gonna sleep.” “This is the type of event that Mr. Stark has told me to inform him about,” Karen says. “Because he is aware you wouldn’t share this type of thing with him on your own.” “Do not do that,” Peter says, shooting another web and cascading through an alleyway. “For real. For real for real. It’s fine, I got it, he doesn’t need to know, okay? He’s busy, this is—Spidey business, I got this, I’ll tell him when it’s all over. All the details. Cross my heart.”

Poison Apple by whumphoarder (5k)

“I-I think something’s wrong with me.”

Ned gives a short laugh. “Pretty sure we established that when you puked in a corn maze. You’ve got like, food poisoning or something.”

Peter shakes his head. “No, not that.” He takes a few short breaths. “Chest feels weird. Kinda hard to breathe.”

ONE-SHOTS

On sleepless roads the sleepless go by frostysunflowers (10k+)

Peter and sleep have been avoiding each other lately. Enter Tony Stark, the man with many plans.

you heal my like the light of day by searchingforstars (9k)

Peter tries to hide a stab wound and an infection-fuelled fever is never any fun. Also, it turns out that Beck is still lurking in Peter's mind much more than anyone realised.

a numb road forward by WhimsicalEthonographies (5k)

The light is bright, painfully so, but Peter can’t jerk away, he can’t do anything because his body is being crushed by something heavy but not entirely unpleasant.

“Hey, there he is,” Mr. Stark’s face appears in front of him, blocking the white light, thank God, then May’s face is next to his, blurry and hazy but it’s them and that’s nice.

“Hi, baby,” May smiles but she looks sad. So does Mr. Stark.

Cyanide? In My Shawarma? by losingmymindtonight (4k+)

Pepper convinces Tony to bring Peter along on his first dinner with the Rogue Avengers since their pardoning.

Poor Tony had thought the whole thing was a recipe for disaster before someone decided to shove some cyanide in his food.

stop, don’t start by iron_spider (3k)

“Shit shit shit.” Tony severely underestimated this guy, if this is on him, because Tony has a backup plan for every backup plan in his suit, has protocols for every misstep, every frayed wire, every glitch, and yet here he is, someone else’s weapon.

The true horror of it doesn’t set in until Tony sees Spider-Man swing by—Tony raises his own hand, aims and locks on.

“No, no!” Tony yells, panicking. “No!”

He shoots a repulsor blast, and knocks Peter out of the air.

Something the Soul Needs by blondsak (3k)

As he races closer, Tony winces at the knowledge that Peter had to have already hit the pavement-- that he was too late. But when Tony finally gets around the last corner, he sees that no-- Peter didn’t hit the pavement. Instead, the scene that greets him is somehow inconceivably worse.

Rather than landing on the cement - which would have been bad enough - Peter had landed on a fence. An old, rusting, wrought iron spiked fence.

[mycupoffanfiction]

His Second Chance Part 8

Bucky x Reader

His Second Chance Masterlist

Bucky comes back from Wakanda with Steve, ready to begin his recovery from his days as the Winter Soldier, but there’s one thing he doesn’t take into account - you.

Warnings: Fluff, angst, language.

Word count: Approx 2300

Masterlist

Bucky starts to find out the Reader’s past. Is this part a bit all over the place? Yes. Is this possibly a bit rambly? Yes. But there we go 😅 

Please don’t hesitate to leave suggestions or thoughts! TAG LISTS ARE OPEN! (Permanent list and His Second Chance list) 

IF YOUR TAG ISN’T WORKING PLS MESSAGE OR ASK 💖💖

___________________________

“How did it happen?” Bucky asked as he ran alongside Steve. He’d finally felt comfortable enough to start venturing out more often and this morning it was on a run with Steve, while you and Sam trailed far behind on your much slower jog. “The day you found (Y/n).” Bucky clarified. “Oof, that’s a multifaceted story, Buck.” Steve remarked as they rounded a corner. “It was around three years ago, just before we discovered you.” Steve began, not even breathless at the high speed they were running at. “We wanted to find her; Fury was interested in her being on the team with her powers so we tracked her for a couple of years.” Steve explained. “She’s hard to find, as soon as you think you’ve found her, she’s disappeared again.” Bucky glanced over his shoulder at you, giggling away to something Sam was telling you. “What was she running from?” Bucky asked, turning his attention back to Steve. “Mm, it’d be best to hear it from her, not me pal.” Steve shook his head. “Anyway, took us a year to find her, she was living in this shitty basement under a gym. It was damp and cold and dark.” Steve pulled a face that Bucky quickly mirrored.

She lived in a crappy basement? Poor girl.

 “I sorta scared the shit out of her, she came back to her basement to find me in the middle of the room, poor girl freaked out so bad she almost shot me.” Steve sighed. “You have a bad habit of doing that.” Bucky rolled his eyes, remembering when Steve had found him in Bucharest. Steve snorted at his remark before continuing the story. “It didn’t take her long to trust me after she saw the shield and the suit.” Steve went on. “I managed to convince her to come back with me and she stayed in my apartment for a while. We grew so close that she joined me when SHIELD was compromised and we discovered you.” Steve explained. “Then she went away for a while after Ultron, needed some time to put herself back together.” Steve finished.

So that’s why I never met her before I came back from Wakanda. Poor girl’s been through a lot too.

 “Do you- uh- do you like her?” Bucky asked, glancing back at you again, berating Sam as he laughed about something. “Of course I like her, Buck.” Steve said it as if it was the most obvious thing. “No, I mean really like her.” Bucky pressed. “Do I love her?” Steve tried to work out what Bucky was getting at. “Not the same way you do, Buck.” He smirked. What? Excuse me, is it that obvious? Fuck me. It is, isn’t it? “What, you’re surprised? C’mon, we see the way you look at her, the way you always gotta be near her, holding her hand.” Steve looked back at you fondly. “But no, she’s like a sister to me, always has been. I might kiss her goodnight and pick her up and cuddle her and call her sweetheart, but she’s not my girl, not like that.” Steve glanced over at Bucky. “I think she’s into you as well, Buck. I’m pretty sure she’d wait for you her whole life if she had to.” Well, if Steve seems to think so… Then he’s probably right.

 “It’s called a supermarket, I know, wild concept.” Sam teased Bucky in the back seat while Steve drove his sedan into the carpark. Bucky delivered a half-hearted slap to Sam’s chest with the back of his hand as he stared straight ahead.

 You went ahead and got the trolley as the boys caught up with you. Perhaps it was childish, but you quite enjoyed being the trolley pusher, also it was a bit of a get out of jail free card since you didn’t have to do any of the actual work. “We had fuckin’ supermarkets in the forties, Sam.” Bucky frowned at Sam as the three soldiers followed close behind you. “Yeah, but they weren’t this big!” Sam gestured wildly, almost hitting Steve in the face as you all walked through the entrance together.

 Sam leaned in to Bucky’s ear as you immediately coined Steve to help get you some herbs from the top shelf. “Also it’s fun because you get to look at (Y/n) while she struggles to reach things and boss Steve around.” Bucky elbowed Sam in the stomach, winding him a little. “Shut up, would ya?” Bucky growled. Don’t talk about her like that… Wait is it any different than me thinking it? Yes, I admire quietly. “Relax, I’m just trying to wind you up.” Sam chuckled. Steve walked off with the list and Sam started examining what you and Steve had already put in the cart.

 Urgh this guy knows how to get under your skin, don’t let him annoy you, deep breath, count to five. One… Two… Three- Bucky looked up to see you, as Sam had described, struggling to reach something. Oh it was cute. Seeing you stretch up, standing on your tip toes, moving onto one foot to elevate yourself a bit. The little bounce you did- and oh good fucking lord her butt jiggles when she bounces on her toes, only slightly but good god. I’m weak, a weak, weak man. Bucky cleared his throat before walking up behind you, resting his flesh hand on your shoulder as he reached up to grab the item your delicate fingers were trying to grab at. “Here you go, doll.” Bucky hummed into your ear, his voice deep and vibrating through your back as his chest pressed slightly up against you. You practically melted from the name he used for you; god did it make you feel things. But no, you restrained yourself because it wasn’t fair on Bucky and you just shyly giggled, feeling your cheeks burn up as you turned to face him.

Doll, oh Barnes, it’s coming back! Wait, what if she doesn’t like it? Bucky examined your flustered features, the way you almost hid your gaze from him. Oh I think she liked it, either that or she- you smiled up at him sweetly. Nope, no, she liked it.

 “Doll, huh?” Sam was quick to jab Bucky about it as soon as you and Steve paired back up again. “Do you need to have a running commentary?” Bucky groaned, glancing over at Sam who just smiled widely and patted Bucky gently on the shoulder. “You know I only comment on you and her because I like you two together.” Sam gave him a genuine smile before parting with Bucky and moving up to help you out with some of the shopping.

 “Please, sweetheart, it’s just an hour.” Steve practically begged you. “Please.” Steve gripped your hand gently. You let out a huff and glanced over at Bucky who was getting ready to go off to his therapy session. You’d said you’d go with him but now Steve was begging for you to join him with training the new recruits since Nat was having a day off. “But I promised Bucky I’d go with him.” You motioned over at your best friend; he gave you a gentle smile as he slipped on his boots. “It’s alright, I can manage by myself.” Bucky reassured you as he pulled his laces tight. “See, Bucky doesn’t need you.” Steve said, his remark not quite coming out the way he meant it and you pouted a bit. That hit a nerve deep down, but you tried not to let it get to you and breath through it.

 I do need you. Bucky looked on at your disappointed expression and sighed. “Smooth.” Bucky grumbled. “You know what I mean, I’m sorry sweetheart.” Steve gripped your hands. “Please, just one time and I’ll never ask you again.” Steve tried to convince you. “Fine! Fine, I’ll do it, but only if you promise.” You poked him sharply in the chest. “Promise! Captain’s honour.” Steve gave you a lopsided grin and you smiled up at him, defeated. “Alright.” You nodded.

 Steve went down before you to get everything set up and you were left alone with Bucky for a moment while he got his things together. “Just so ya know,” Bucky looked over his shoulder at you as he grabbed his backpack and then turned to face you. “I always need you.” Bucky gave you the sweetest smile and you felt your cheeks burn up. In your flustered state, you weren’t quite sure what to say, but you grinned up at him, completely taken aback by his words. “Oh Buck.” You whispered, walking towards him and wrapping your arms around his middle. Yes! You’re getting some of your confidence back, Barnes. Bucky embraced you for a moment before moving away and running a hand through his hair. “I gotta go, see ya later.” Bucky smiled down at you before turning away and leaving you alone.

 Training with the recruits was taking a lot longer than just an hour and you were starting to get antsy. You were pretty sure Steve had given you a nice sounding time estimate just to convince you into doing it.

Three and a half slow hours passed and training finally ended. You made your way up to your floor, exhausted and about ready to collapse in a heap on the sofa with Bucky to watch something or play a game.

 You walked into an empty living room, Steve trailing behind you. “Buck, we’re back!” Steve called through. Sam popped his head out of his room and looked at you for a moment before pointing at Bucky’s room, pulling a face. You frowned and strode across to Bucky’s bedroom, knocking before letting yourself in. “Bucky?” You asked softly before opening the door wide. There he was, sat on the edge of his bed with a folder in his hand. Your heart leaped into your throat when you see the folder he was holding. Bucky has seen you bare, seen the hard truth of your past in the pieces of paper held between the sickly orange folder.

 “Why didn’t you tell me?” Bucky asked. “You never said you were ex Hydra.” He mumbled. “Buck, I was never Hydra by choice.” You sighed, entering his room and closing the door behind you, Steve looking a bit dejected that you’d just closed the door on his face. “Just like you.” You almost kicked yourself for saying that, but Bucky glanced at you, sadness replacing the bitterness in his eyes and he gave you a guilty look. “You want to know what happened? I’ll tell you everything if you want.” You offered. Bucky just nodded and you slowly approached his bed and sat down next to him.  

 “My parents were running low on money, really low on money. My mother knew some shady people in the drug trade and she volunteered to have a drug tested for three hundred dollars cash.” You began explaining. Oh god, I can see where this is going already. “So an older guy shows up, Alexander Pierce.” You fiddled with the hem of your top as you spoke. God the fucking bastard hurt you and her. “My mother strapped me down on the dining table and they injected me with a serum. They conned my mother out of the deal and she never got her fucking money. But that serum messed with my DNA, it burned my entire body for hours. It felt like I was on fire, like there was fire in my veins for four hours until I passed out from the pain.” You explained. Bucky looked absolutely disgusted. “Oh god, no doll.” Bucky whispered, taking your hand in his. Why did I have to overreact? This is horrible, she’ll think you blame her for her own pain. “The serum caused my powers. My dad walked out on my mother, but he couldn’t take me with him. I went through a lot of stuff when I was alone with that woman, she would scream at me about how I was worthless and a freak, a waste of space.” You almost choked up when you remembered how she’d hurt you. “You’re not any of those things, doll.” Just wanna hug you better, hug us better. You gave Bucky a watery smile and he saw all of the pain in your eyes, it made his heart break.

 “I ran away, I went to Canada and I was safe for a while, but Hydra caught me.” You cried, tears streaming down your face at this point and Bucky pulled you tightly against his chest. “Shh, doll, I’m sorry, god, I’m so sorry. I should never have brought it up.” Bucky cradled your head against his chest. In truth you were happy to get it all out in the open so that you and Bucky were on the same page. “I never should have assumed you were in Hydra by choice.” Idiot, so stupid, god you were so over dramatic and you should have known. Idiot, idiot, idio-. “Bucky.” You interrupted his self-deprecating thoughts and Bucky turned to look at you. “I’m out. I escaped, I was with them for around six months before I got out and got back to New York and then I moved around for a while before Steve found me.” You finished explaining and Bucky nodded. “Hydra fucked us both over.” You whispered. Bucky held you tighter. “I’m so fucking sorry.” Bucky apologised against the shell of your ear. “I’m not upset at you, if anything, I’m sorry you found out through a piece of damn paper.” You sniffled. “Please don’t cry.” Bucky squeezed you a bit more. “I’m sorry I made you cry.” Bucky practically pulled you onto his lap and buried his face in your shoulder.

 “We can do this together.” Bucky whispered. “You and me, we can heal together, doll.”

_______________________

Forever Tag List:

@shygirl-00 @swanlakemikey @scuzmunkie @paintballkid711 @lovelylilia @mapreza1 @love-bucky-3000 @cals-cigarette @scarlett-berserker @2407zzz@mercurybarnes @mywinterwolf @geeksareunique @fairislesheets @wendaiii @mochibarnes

His Second Chance Tag List:

@socialheartbreak @whatsupbucky @yesno18 @just-a-littlebit-of-everything @crystallstaircase @megantje123 @fantua @lady-x-red @buckys-islandgirl @chipilerendi @butteryoptimisticpeanut @wowitsemilysblog @dark-night-sky-99 @marvel-ous-bucky @rand0mfangurlstuff @tfandtws @vxidnik @books-baritones-bucky @bluerorjhan @calwitch

[maladaptive-ninja-returns]

The Bad Guy (1)

Bucky x fem!Reader

CHAPTER 1: THE FAKEOUT

Series: A Bad Guy ruins Bucky’s day. But turns out it’s the bad guy he needs to seek help from after all. New York may not have changed much for him, but there are certain things he is discovering to be quite new!

Chapter warnings: swearing.

A/N: @writing-prompt-s​ once gave a prompt last year that stuck with me…I don’t remember the exact wordings but it had something to do with the reader/writer being the villain having a crush on the hero, always finding excuses (or crimes) to meet them. One day they are getting their ass beat and you decide to jump in and save the day. This one is same but with a liiiiiiiitle twist

Word Count: There are times I wish I was a llama. or a cat. Now is one of those times.

“You can do it. You. Can. Do. It. You’re the man. You’re the freaking man. Yes. Yes. You got it. You absolutely got it.”

“You okay, man?” Bucky had to ask.

“You absolutely don’t got it. I can’t do it, man. I’m outta here.”

Bucky grabbed Scott’s arm before that guy could rush back to the SUV they had come in. As much as he wanted to kick this sweaty ex-thief out of here, he knew the plan wasn’t going to work in Scott’s absence. He needed a guy to make him seem legit. At least that’s what Natasha had told him.

“Calm down,” Bucky reassured the man who was sweating tennis balls by now, “you just need to show the ID. Natasha has taken care of the rest and I would be doing the talking. Okay?”

Scott was half-listening by the time Bucky had finished. “Huh? Yeah! Yeah! Cool cool cool cool cool cool cool!”

Bucky could empathise on some level with Scott. After all, it was weird for an ex-con to visit a prison as a fake lawyer while trying to get a felon out of there under the noses of the authority. 

The plan was pretty simple. Arrange a meeting with that woman whom Bucky had met earlier, gain her trust, get her out of jail under the pretence of getting her to help with an unsolved case and find out the location and identity of the people behind the theft of Tony’s precious painting.

Simple.

Then why was Bucky’s back feeling so wet whenever a humid wind blew at the opening of every rusty door in the maximum-security prison?

The room was covered in cameras in all corners. To Bucky’s satisfaction, Natasha already told him and Scott they did not record any conversations for lawyer-client confidentiality- so any conversation that was about to happen was going to stay between these three. The musty smell of the room was somehow familiar to both of them, bringing mixed feelings to the surface- to which they barely had time to react when a figure in orange jumpsuit walked in, forcing all their attention on it.

“Hey boys!” You greeted the party, already recognising Bucky from the rendezvous you two had a few days ago. “Ay!! You’re that beat cop no one listened to that day!”

Bucky did not know how to react to that. He was not really expecting their interaction to go this way. Scott, on the other hand, was a little relieved to have your attention glued on anyone but him.

“Oh, right! I told you we’d be having the conversation after I get processed,” you added with a tone of realisation, “Wow, I didn’t know you were so into that robbery!”

You dragged the chair out with your leg and sat on it, legs spread wide- keeping comfort over societal mannerisms. Resting your cuffed hands on the table you gave a knowing smirk to Bucky, who was trying to figure out what exactly was going on behind that viciously delicious smile. “Or is it something else that is intriguing you?” You raised a brow. "Did I use that right? Intriguing you? Something that you're intrigued by?"

"That sounds better," Scott blurted out, regretting it the very second because now your suspicion-filled eyes were all for him.

"You…" you narrowed your eyes at Scott, making the man sit straight in his chair.

"He's my lawyer," Bucky was quick to dive in, "I mean, he's the lawyer we-I... he is interested in represen...He’s a lawyer." For the first time in his life, Bucky was glad Scott and Sam had forced him to watch Law and Order.

“...ok...kay.”

"Scott. Scott Lang," he introduced himself, bringing his hand forward for a shake.

“You have the eyes of a thief,” you stated while Scott’s hand was still in the air, making the poor man slowly take it back while his pale face looked at Bucky with an ‘I told you so’ expression. “No wonder you’re a lawyer.”

Next moment, you slumped into the chair, looking a little offended at something Bucky did. Or so he thought. “Did I hurt you?”

Bucky blinked at you before his brain smacked his accelerating heart to give something instead of just sitting there. “I’m sorry?”

“Did I hurt you the last time we met? I get that I have some kinda...powers but I don’t just throw them around. We could have had a conversation over some prison coffee. You didn’t have to bring your friend here.”

It took three seconds at minimum for Bucky’s brows to shoot up and his lips to crack wide in a smile. “W-what? No! He’s not here for me. He’s here for you. We’re getting you out of here.”

It was hard to put a word into the expression you just gave. Your eyes shifted between the two men while your open lips were shut and your face tilted a little towards the door.

“Uhhhhh-” was the only thing coming out of your mouth till your body got up from the chair and your cuffed hands pressed together towards your company- “listen, cop guy...man. I really meant it in a casual way when I said we’ll ‘talk later’. I don’t really know how much you’ve read into this. I mean, I would say ‘at least buy me dinner first’ but I am kinda scared as to where that might lead us. Good, God! Now I’m wondering what would you have done if I’d said something more like ‘hey, let’s f-”

“NO!” Bucky nearly jumped off his seat, his hands over the table trying to stop your words from coming out from a safe distance. “I’m not getting you out of here because I like you-” he stopped right when he heard himself, watching your curious eyes witness his mouth play him like a ten-cent flute- “no, I mean I like you but not in that kind of...what I mean to say is I know why you tried to steal that painting. I found out from my sources that these paintings are being used by this new mafia around the world supplying narcotics and codes on the trafficked girls and boys to their buyers for bids. And I was hoping you could help us catch the people behind the...painting.”

Bucky was cursing himself right and left, feeling the heat rise in his cheeks at nearly messing it up. Why did she have to be this accurate? His inner voice mocked him before smacking him in the head and calling him a jock.

“I don’t know if you remember but I was caught by you guys while threatening the New Yorkers.”

“While you were trying to help Ste-Rogers. Captain Rogers. And no one caught you. You surrendered yourself.”

“I hate cops. I can’t work with them.”

“You won’t be working with them. You’ll be working with us. Me and a couple of my friends.”

“I don’t work for free. And before you put a price tag on my work, remember that I am inside this prison because I want to stay here. For now.”

“How about a date with Steve Rogers?”

“Dude, you can’t put a price on my-wait what?”

“I’ll ask him to go out with you if you catch those sons of bitches.”

Maybe it was the serenade playing from somewhere inside the prison. Or maybe it was the sun strolling in from the windows. Or maybe it was the mention of his best friend that made your pupils go wider, your fingers work over the skin on your arm, doodling some invisible hearts with a bitchface before you straightened from the table and the sound from your cuffs nearly made Scott fall off his chair.

“I don’t work with supes. They disgust me. Especially Tony Snark and his redhead sister and that C-grade Legolas. I’m out.”

“We won’t be working with them. But I can pull a few strings to get you that date. I promise. And I’m sure Steve...Rogers would be more than willing to go out with you if there is one less bad guy walking out on the streets.”

“...you better not be joking about this-”

“James Barnes.”

“James. Because if you are, I will drive a monster truck into your house, take away your pet and fuck your mother till she forgets her own name.”

“My mother’s dead,” he was quick to add while Scott gasped at the audacity of this bitch- you; you were the bitch.

“Your girlfriend, then,” you simply shrugged. Bucky’s brain straight away flashed to a two-second fantasy of you and Natasha in her room, on her bed.

“Bold of you to assume he has a girlfriend,” Scott chortled till he could see Bucky’s Winter Soldier parts staring at him with all the coldness.

.

It wasn’t in his nature to give a place to bad things inside his Bucky heart. It definitely wasn’t in the now peaceful Winter Soldier’s nature to peek from inside Bucky and stare with stars in his eyes at the woman coming out in her shirt and jeans topped by a leather jacket. She’s bad, his mind kept ringing the gong, real bad. And when that wasn’t enough, she put on those aviators to shield her eyes from the harsh noon sun, walking towards him with the strut that said she was woman enough to grab someone by the balls if need be. You’ll get yourself killed by a woman, Barnes, his mind went off again.

“No, I won't,” he muttered out loud.

“What?” Scott asked.

“What?”

Bucky tried to ignore him, his eyes stuck on you as you came and stood by them.

“Keys,” you ordered, watching Bucky fish his pockets without breaking eye contact and handing the keys of the Land Rover to you. “Let’s go.”

Scott grabbed Bucky by the arm to pull him closer. “Dude! She has the keys!”

“...okay? Why are we whispering?”

“Wh-What are we gonna do if she tries to do something...evil!”

“Like what?”

“Like I don’t know, throw us off a cliff! Or drive us into a wall. Or worse, go over the speed limit in the city!!”

“Relax! I’m here,” Bucky reassured before opening the door to the back seat of the car for him. “I got you.”

Hopping in and sitting next to you, he noticed for the first time how you smelled like a pleasant mixture of spring and citrus.

“What cologne is that?” you called out from nowhere while turning on the engine, turning to look at Bucky.

“Uhhh….it’s an aftershave. For men.” He nodded, cursing himself instantly for adding that last bit. Of course, it’s for men, you twat!

“Smells nice,” you complimented before turning out of the parking spot.

“I’m glad you’re on board with this,” Bucky stated, trying to undo the mess he made a few seconds ago, “I wasn’t trying to overstep when I-we decided to get you to help us out.”

You chuckled, shifting gear.

“Oh, sweetheart! One, I loved this isn’t an automatic. Those are for weak testicled-babies. And two, you clearly misinterpreted me in there. When I said I was not expecting you to bail me outta jail for a date, I wasn’t grossed out by it, darling. I liked it.” You leaned a little closer to Bucky- having a glorious view of his pupils go wide like oceans with endless pits- to end him with one last whisper and wink. “In a very kinky way.”

And just as the car swerved out to the wide road, Scott could feel the air leave his lungs. “What have we done,” he whispered to himself, questioning all that was about to come.

[xcziel]

Multi-Fandom Slash Fic Recs: Long reads for your quarantine needs

Was gonna add my own 2 cents for each rec, but it got long and I'll never post if I have to think about it anymore - may edit to add more commentary. Suffice it to say, these are all great long reads, not much angst, some smutty some not, highly improbable levels of things-working-out because it's fanfic and that's what it's for. Feel free to troll through my AO3 Bookmarks as well.

The One Where They're Stars on HGTV Series

earlgreytea68

Inception: Arthur/Eames

AU, 466,359 words 9 works Complete

Summary:

"Have you ever seen "Love It or List It"? In which Arthur is the real estate agent and Eames is the designer.

Eames is certain that they will excel at being celebrity judges.

Arthur is not so sure.

But then, that's usually how their relationship goes."

My 2 cents: Just what it says on the tin: Arthur and Eames are HGTV stars of a show which pits straightlaced realtor Arthur against flamboyant designer Eames, but the new show they're embarking on will give them a chance to work together. Arthur has his reservations - not least among them the surprise arrival of Eames' superficially charming ex. Eames, of course, has all the confidence in the world. Featuring fun design challenges, mildly insecure Athur, fluffy confidant Ariadne, reality show 'backstage' melodrama, Arthur becomes a meme, Eames fantastical decorating schemes, a Matt Bomer lookalike complete with fedora (trilby), and acres of gauzy romantic fluff.

We Begin Again Series

katherynefromphilly

Merlin: Merlin/Arthur

316,197 words 4 works

Summary:

"For many long years Merlin waited.

For the other part of his soul, for the other half of his life. He was born to serve Arthur. So that meant he was also born to wait. Even if it took a thousand years. Even if the wait seemed never to end.

Until one day, suddenly, it did.

When Arthur stumbles from the Lake of Avalon 1,500 years after his death, he finds a world unlike the one he knew. Faced with the loss of everyone he loved, and the threat of impending prophecy, Arthur must learn what it means to be not just a king, but the Once and Future King. Merlin does all he can to guide him, even as he struggles to hide his love for his king, and his fear of losing him again.

Story includes sass, banter, horseplay, & True Love."

Infinite Coffee and Protection Detail Series

owlet

MCU: Steve/Bucky

264,438 words 8 works

Summary:

"The mission resets abruptly, from objective: kill to objective: protect

Integration into adult human social dynamics requires attention and effort. Especially with this bunch of damaged bozos.

(A series of interconnected one-shots.)"

2 cents: Post-Winter Soldier Bucky works his own way through. Recovery fic from Bucky's POV, not shippy in the beginning (unless you consider MCU-canon-level co-dependency shippy I guess) and with added 'Avengers living in the Tower' flavor

The Sonnet Series

nekosmuse, afrocurl

X-Men: Charles/Erik

AU, 196,721 words 3 works

Summary:

"Erik Lehnsherr is a visiting professor at Columbia University, as well as an acclaimed and award winning poet. Charles Xavier is a lead researcher with the Genetics Department who is well on his way to tenure. But what happens when Charles has to cancel a class because half his students abandon him in favour of a mysterious new English Lit professor? Naturally he ends up sitting in in the class, where Professor Lehnsherr mistakes him for a student. It's really too bad Erik has such a strict policy against dating students. It's also too bad Erik doesn't seem to know how to use Google."

Hollywood 'verse Series

clio_jlh

Star Trek AOS: Kirk/McCoy

80,063 words 7 works

Summary:

"From Variety, June 2008:

Pavel Chekov ("Charlie X") and Gaila ("Bread and Circuses") have joined the cast of small budget drama "That Which Survives," funded by Fleet's indie arm Academy and supervised by Nyota Uhura.

The debut feature from longtime script doctor Leonard McCoy, former show runner on sitcom "Three to Tango," centers on a college student coping with his father's terminal cancer. Chekov plays the son, Gaila the nurse. The father is yet to be cast.

Also attached are director James T. Kirk and producer Spock, the team behind the blockbuster spy-girl franchise starring Carol Marcus, the latest of which, "A Taste of Armageddon," opened last month.

(A modern-day Hollywood AU.)"

A Curious Carriage of Crystal and Cold

Etharei

X-Men: Charles/Erik

AU, 114,261 words

Summary:

"Charles, a miner from a poor village in the countryside, saves the life of Erik Lehnsherr, scion of a successful business family and the richest man on the planet Eisen. Charles is a telepath and somewhat anxious about it, while Erik abstains from relationships because the lights flicker and doors open and electronics vibrate when he gets too excited.

Also featuring a long-suffering sister, a foul-mouthed bodyguard, and a best friend with a heart that is definitely not gold.

In which there are princes, spaceships, long journeys, and old secrets uncovered. (An AU sci-fi fairytale)"

Shadowlord and Pirate King Series

Footloose, mushroomtale

Merlin: Merlin/Arthur

AU, 216,060 words 3 works

Summary:

"A fast ship, a good crew, a treasure, a Clan to lead -- that's all Arthur Pendragon has ever wanted. He sits on the Council, he supports his father's kingship, and he keeps an eye on the Imperial Conglomerate when they come too close to Pirate space.

One day the Conglomerate infiltrates the Clans and poisons the King. Arthur must search for a cure to keep his father alive and the Clans from civil war.

An escape route, a sharp knife, a target, the shadows at his command -- that's all Merlin has ever needed. He fulfills his assignments, he uses the Sterling to sustain his once-royal House in their exile, and wages a private war against the Imperial Conglomerate.

When he learns of an elaborate plot to assassinate him, Merlin does the opposite of what's expected. He flees onto a Pirate ship.

There's a saying among the Pirates: that one's fate is written in the stars. Destiny will always set to rights what has been made wrong.

Arthur and Merlin know that they were meant for the other from the moment they meet. They can feel it from across the galaxies separating them. Nothing can stop them from being together or from fulfilling an ancient prophecy."

Children, Wake Up Series

hollycomb

Star Wars sequels: Kylo Ren/Armitage Hux

non-canon after Force Awakens, 608,083 words 3 works

Warning for torture and past sexual assault (offscreen)

Summary:

"Hux follows orders and loses his way.

Barricaded in the darkness of Snoke's citadel as part of his final training, Kylo Ren senses a disturbance in the Force: General Hux in great pain, captured and tortured by a faction of radical traitors within the First Order. Ren seeks Snoke's counsel and finds him gone. He knows this is a test, and that he must resist the urge to assist the General. And yet."

2 cents: I don't even know. I started just to look at it and then somehow I couldn't stop. Two characters I find wholly irredeemable given back story enough to make me suspend disbelief just enough to enjoy the fic - now that's talent. Features background Finn/Rey and Luke/Wedge if you care about that, and generally has everyone written in a positive light except Snoke, including a surprising handful of of First Order refugees. It's weirdly not at all a dark fic, despite the premise and extreme levels of Force Ex Machina.

snipers solve 99% of all problems

silentwalrus

Fullmetal Alchemist: post-canon gen

HP crossover, 170,861 words, 59 chapters so far, WIP

Summary:

"Ed had thought, after the whole Promised Day, homunculus, entire country harvested for alchemical batteries thing, the batshit quotient of his life would have settled down some. He really ought to have topped out the meter with that one. But no. The bullshit is just getting started.

“Are you fucking kidding me,” Ed demands. “The wizards?”"

2 cents: Neither of these are my fandom, but I have read all the HP books, so I could get the gist. While jonesing for an update, I ended up bingeing FMA: Brotherhood and I have no regrets. Ed working alchemy-as-science and trying to translate wizardry into scientific alchemical workarounds is all I never knew I wanted. Team Amestris takes JKR's creation to school, with all the swearing you'd expect sprinkled throughout for ambiénce.

[winterironholidayexchange]

2018 WI Holiday Exchange: Gift List

A giant THANK YOU to everyone who was a part of the @winterironholidayexchange this year. No matter if you created something, shared our posts to get the word out, or are now leaving comments and kudos on all the wonderful stories and art, this exchange wouldn’t have been possible without each and every one of you.

You rock, you are the best, and we love you.

And now, the thing we know you’ve all been waiting for: the complete gift list.

Enjoy! ⛄

“Welcome! Everything is fine.” by burbear for sara_wolfe

The afterlife was a lot weirder than Tony thought it should be. For one, it’s called the Good Place, and the points system that decides whether a person goes to the Good Place or not definitely had a flaw in it somewhere because, hello, why would he, Tony Stark of all people, be in the Good Place? Also, there’s a ridiculous number of frozen yogurt shops.

Just what the fork is going on here?

❄

Nightmare Dressed Like a Daydream by DreamcatchersDaughter for glyphsbowtie

Bucky accidentally crashes a blind date and hes not all that sorry about it.

❄

Mini-Stark by TheMaroonRedWolf for Tahlruil

De-aged Tony fic. My fill for the 2018 WinterIron Holiday Exchange.

❄

Wicked Game by StarSpangledBucky for OneSmartChicken

Leading a double life was troubling enough for Bucky, one as the superhero ‘The Winter Soldier’, the other as a florist. Now that his newfound friend, Tony Stark (who only knows him as Winter) has met the other side of him, things get complicated. Bucky isn’t prepared for the consequences he might face, as love between himself and Tony starts blossoming…quicker than he ever intended.

❄

Up, Up, Down, Down… by burbear for monobuu

Tony has just about had it with Loki and magic, seriously. Being transported into a kid’s movie? How is this even a kid’s movie? And no offense, Thor, magic hammers are not that great. Oh, and to top it all off, he’s dressed in ridiculous blue outfit like some kind of retro handyman while his crush gets a badass cyber-suit.

God, he hates magic.

❄

barren winter with his wrathful nipping cold by sevedra for StarSpangledBucky

Tony had expected to spend this Christmas alone. But he has James now. All is looking up for them until secrets try to tear them apart.

❄

Undercover by glyphsbowtie for marsmaywander

“It’s absolutely an option.” Bucky unfolds himself from the doorframe, rising to his full, impressive height languidly, like a deadly cat uncurling from a nap. “You’re all too recognisable, right? Nobody is going to recognise me. Stick some nerd glasses on me and I’ll blend right into a tech conference.” The idea of Bucky in glasses does things to Tony, but he clears his throat and looks back down at the laptop, trying to avoid making eye contact with Bucky. “Yeah, except for one obvious problem, old man. You’re a million years old and know absolutely nothing about tech.” - Bucky and Tony work together on a mission, and Bucky reveals he knows about Tony’s secret crush on him.

❄

The Tsum of Our Parts by Shi_Toyu for Briz

Tony couldn’t remember a time when he hadn’t had his soul Tsum. The little thing had appeared as soon as Tony was born, which wasn’t completely unheard of. It just meant that his soulmate was older than him, old enough to have already developed their own Tsum characteristics, so maybe early teenage years. That happened all the time. It wasn’t even particularly scandalous. They’d probably meet later in life, when the age gap didn’t mean quite so much.

What was unusual was how cold his Tsum was.

❄

Howl At The Night by Eirlyssa for beir

Having escaped from their kidnappers, Bucky and Tony have to find a way to get home. Unfortunately, Tony isn’t doing very well.

❄

Plums by Morethancupcake for Feelingsinwinter

“Everything hurts for a second, and the Asset fights the nausea, tries to figure out where he is, what he’s supposed to do, and most of all, who decided to taunt him with his words.”

The Asset isn’t supposed to dream, but he does, and soon his world revolves around a smart little boy with brown eyes.

❄

Journeys End in Lovers Meeting by TheSopherfly for Arboreal

Bucky writes letters to his sweetheart back home during the war. Nobody knows his sweetheart is Anthony Stark, Howard’s younger brother.

~

In which Tony and Bucky meet, part, and meet again.

❄

Get Your Flirt On (Or: How to Stare Your Way into a Date) by InsaneJuliann for Nantai

Bucky’s come to Hogwarts for his seventh year, and joins the Quidditch team at the persistence of his friends Clint and Steve. Through a Quidditch game he meets Tony - competitive and constantly sending Bucky challenging looks. Bucky has no idea what his deal is - or why everyone he knows thinks Tony’s not as much of a jerk as their little stare-offs would make him seem.

❄

Tattoos and Tulips by MassiveSpaceWren for Morethancupcake

Silver fox tattoo artist Tony goes on a date with florist Bucky.

❄

Prank Wars gone wrong by IronEyes for dendrite_blues

Bucky and Tony are roommates and hate each other from the start. It starts to delevop in a prank war that hurts nobody, until Tony takes it too far. Or does he?

❄

Swipe Right by dendrite_blues for tonystans

hey we hooked up last night and it turns out you are my kid’s teacher.

❄

You’ve become quite familiar by MassiveSpaceWren for Morethancupcake

Tony recently gained a slighly scruffy crow as a roommate.

❄

Of instagramers and their followers by eriot for TheVagabondBoy

prompt:  Bucky the Instagram Thot, Tony the thirsty hoe.

❄

Resilient by nativemossy for gryvon

Anthony “Tony” Carbonell, disinherited son of a billionaire, proud graduate of a community college in nowhere New Jersey, and out-and-proud bisexual is the proprietor of a small coffee shop by the name of Resilient. Now that his life has settled down he’s beginning to suspect that he might have a few problems that are making work much harder than it needs to be.

James “Bucky” Barnes, disabled veteran, hermit, and long-suffering best friend has returned from Afghanistan to a world that he doesn’t quite know how to live in. He wants to contribute more to the world than sitting on his couch and collecting his check every month, but is having a hard time gathering the energy to do much more than tie his shoes.

A coffee shop full of meddling friends might be just the place where both men can find a place to heal and move on, hopefully together.

❄

Anima by Arboreal for burbear

Bucky had always been able to hear the voices of the things around him.

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Focus by Nantai for eriot

Bucky Barnes, veteran and ex-assassin, is just trying to make some legal money for once. He is reformed after all! Tony Stark, billionaire and mob boss, really needs an escort who can double as security because Steve is a worrywart.

Neither planned for secrets to come out and apologies to be made. And yet, here we are…

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Resting Murder Face by camichats for lordofsoup

Everyone knows that Bucky and Tony love each other.

…Except for Tony and Bucky. After watching them pine uselessly, the Avengers and Company do their best to get them together, even if the oblivious idiots make it more difficult than it needs to be.

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I Just Died In Your Arms Tonight by Sullen for TheMaroonRedWolf

Okay, look, it’s not James’ fault, no matter what the rumors say. The guy was so scrawny he could be blown over by the wind. This is a crowded hallway! If you don’t want to get knocked over, you should keep some meat on your bones, your stance wide, and not run around corners and into him.

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I Will Always Be by blue_pointer for celtic7irish

In a world where people see through the eyes of their soulmates when they sleep, Tony Stark’s dreams send him off the edge.

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You Bring Me Peace by Towaneko for IronEyes

Time has been reversed for Tony Stark and this is when he first meets Bucky Barnes.

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Not Exactly What I Wanted by Tahlruil for phlintandsteel

Tony has always been happy to piss off Alphas who try to control him - especially Howard Stark. Unfortunately he managed to push his father just a little too far… and the man arranged to have him auctioned off to the highest bidder. Now he’s married to a guy he hardly knows, one that is too damn patient and too damn nice. There’s no way that isn’t an act, and Tony is resolved to be a little shit until he finds out the limits of his husband’s fake personality.

Though he’s been back from the war for a while, Bucky has been left scarred by the experience. The most prominent one is the personality that came into being because of Hydra’s torture and brainwashing attempts when he was captured. They were rescued before they became the Winter Soldier, but Winter is still very much sharing space in his head. Winter has never responded to anyone positively… until they met Tony at an auction Bucky had been dragged to by a former commanding officer. They are both captivated by the Omega and buy him despite their better judgement.

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The Warlord’s Tribute by TheSopherfly for MassiveSpaceWren

Warlord Bucky, rumored to be ruthless, ends up in the possession of Tony, who slowly learns that Bucky isn’t so bad.

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Safe (Only In Your Loving Arms) by tonystans for Eirlyssa

“No eating in the lab, that’s poor etiquette.”

“And you’re all about etiquette and rules since when?”

Tony playfully rolled his shoulder and turned his head away from Bucky, acting the part of scandalized. “Since Steve gave me one lecture too many.”

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One More Day (Five Hundred Left To Go) by Rospergs for Estelle

Tony and Bucky go to the same gym. Bucky looks very rough and intimidating. Tony is a single parent and looks small and frail. Then Tony finds out Bucky is the new preschool teacher at his child’s school, and is super kind, and amazing with the kids. Lots of mutual pining happens.

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Love Planted a Rose by Gavilan for iCheat

Bucky wants to show Tony how much he likes him … but how?

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We need to talk about babies by GenericUserHere for sevedra

The classic ‘I’m pregnant but we haven’t discussed having tiny humans yet’ fic Otherwise known as Tony is pregnant and Bucky is accidentally a dick but luckily these idiots have friends who help them work out their shit

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Dust to Dust by lordofsoup for Shi_Toyu

One moment Tony is fighting TaskMaster. The next moment he’s back on Titan.

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ready to comply. by rightsidethru for james

It wasn’t often that Tony himself went to the weapons conventions that those in the business knew about: he’d always been of the opinion that that was what his minions in R&D were for—scoping out the competition, making notes on key elements that they liked, seeing how Stark weapons were assessed by those in attendance. Tony already knew that his designs were top-of-the-line, that the companies who could stand up against the leviathan of his reputation were few and far between—but there were still contenders. Sometimes.

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Don’t Overthink It by Potrix for Gavilan

Now, Jim is about as straight as a person can be—tested a couple of times by drunkenly making out with his best friend, which Tony loves to bring up whenever it’s really inappropriate to do so—but he has no problem admitting that, objectively speaking, Barnes is an attractive guy. He’s got that whole gruff, frowny, bad boy thing a lot of people are into going on, but whenever he actually does smile, it’s devastating.

One time, Jim had seen a girl on the street do a double-take and nearly walk into a magazine stand after Barnes had smiled at one of Tony’s dumb jokes.

Or, alternatively; Rhodey means well, meddles, and actually sort-of-kind-of ends up helping in the end.

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over or under me? by Larissaloki for Sullen

hunger over bucky made a phone call the night before and forgot.

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Under Your Skin by Niki for endof_theline

It’s not often an alpha gets quite as deep under an omega’s skin…

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mythos by beir for Towaneko

The lights flickered back on. There, standing behind Barnes, was the Merchant of Death.

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Project Relationship by iCheat for blue_pointer

Peter and Harley are best friends and they have a project to do. After some debate they decide to get their Dads together. Scientifically. It does not go as they planned.

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Love Tap by Feelingsinwinter for DreamcatchersDaughter

When Bucky started dating Tony, a kindergarten teacher, he was expecting the usual trouble. Some issues with Bucky’s life as a mob boss to begin with, a bit of screaming, a bit of swearing maybe. Some fight, possibly, after all Tony looked ready to fuck shit up if need be. He wasn’t expecting Tony to accept it with open arms and start to gift him with bags of rifles but Bucky could roll with it.

Probably could’ve done without the troubles that came with that, however.

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Stay in my arms if you dare (or must I imagine you there) by Estelle for Chef_Geekier

Bucky doesn’t exactly think that being a bodyguard is his dream job, but after leaving the military, it was a good way to make money without having to go through a lot of education and training. When he gets hired by Howard Stark to protect his son, he thinks that that will be easy enough. Turns out that it isn’t, especially not once feelings are involved.

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Happy Together by TheVagabondBoy for Potrix

The tattoos might have been one of the first things of Bucky’s that Tony had fallen in love with.

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The Long Con (Don’t Kid Yourself) by phlintandsteel for camichats

When Tony finds out that Howard is thinking about changing the terms of Tony’s trust fund, he embarks on a not-so-elaborate scheme to prove that he’s totally settling down and not in continued need of Howard’s “guidance” until 25 instead of 21. Step 1: Get a fiance Step 2: ??? Step 3: Profit (Finally be free of Howard)

Unfortunately, Tony Stark is the worst con-artist ever, and may only be kidding himself…

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In Your Hands by james for its_inherited

Sometimes Bucky needs help to relax.  Tony loves to provide.

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The Price of Forgiveness by celtic7irish for Cheerydandan

Tony fell in love once.  And then his lover left without so much as a good-bye, and Tony moved on with his life.  Now, Bucky Barnes is back, hired to be Tony’s personal assistant and hoping to pick up where they left off.  Can Tony learn to forgive him?  Will he risk opening his heart once more?

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While You’re Busy Making Other Plans by marsmaywander for TheSopherfly

Bucky was cold, tired, and his bum shoulder was killing him. Being stuck in the middle of Nowhere, North Carolina with a busted bike was not how he envisioned spending the last few weeks of his leave. Thankfully, there’s a sleep-deprived, big-hearted mechanic there to help Bucky out.

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Forward-Facing by Eirlyssa for Larissaloki

Bucky is doing fine, he really is. But Steve wants him to be more than just fine, which is why he asks his friend to join a yoga class in the park.

Which is where he first sees Tony.

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answering a salty siren call by OneSmartChicken for GenericUserHere

Yeah only an idiot wouldn’t have at least a little crush on Bucky, and Tony really wasn’t an idiot.

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Three times Tony brought Bucky out of a zone by Briz for InsaneJuliann

And one time he didn’t.

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Nothing Changes (Except You) by ezazahaz for badgerling

Between teammates bickering over breakfast cereal, a boring Stark Industries meeting Pepper wants him to attend, and rampaging trees in Central Park, Tony isn’t having the best day.

The fact that it keeps repeating only makes it worse.

But then it turns out he isn’t alone–Bucky Barnes remembers the repeating day as well. They’ll need to work together to find a way to escape the mysterious loop… and maybe become a little closer in the process.

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Ready to Comply by monobuu for Rospergs

For the prompt: “What if Tony had been captured by Hydra.”

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Let This Be Called a Word Unpronounceable by badgerling for rightsidethru

Tony was fine serving the detention he had earned. He was not okay with serving detention with Bucky Barnes. And he definitely not okay with running for his life from a manticore. An apparent manticore. Because there shouldn’t be manticores in the Forbidden Forest.

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The lesser of two evils by Briz for ezazahaz

Bucky has trouble sleeping when Tony ends up hurt by his hand during a mission

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Grown With Love by endof_theline for nativemossy

Tony Stark, college student, single father, and wingless? Tony meets a stranger at the gym that helps him in a way that he had deemed impossible, it’s just a bonus that the single father status might change to father along the way.

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Better For You by gryvon for malome78

Tony stares at the extensive array of baked goods. There are shelves full of different flavors of cupcakes, trays of cookies, a variety of scones and muffins and things that look good but he has no idea what they are. There are almost too many options. He’s getting diabetes just from looking at all of it.  

“What’s the occasion?” Hot barista asks.

“Business meeting. What says ‘Sorry for showing up an hour late?’”

Hot barista comes to a stop across the counter from Tony, arches an eyebrow, and says, deadpan, “Being on time.” 

[underthemoon-and-stars]

Hello! May I request a oneshot where an ex of yours comes to visit the tower and stay for some time and Boyfriend!Bucky sees you two hanging out and gets jealous or insecure. (Private 💙)

Hi lovely!!! Thank you so much!!! I’m sorry this took so long. I hope this is what you wanted!!!

Word Count- 1.6 K

-Selenophile

Sam thought he was going to have a lovely training session with his new found friend, Bucky. What he actually received was the medium sized, long-haired brunette boy rant about his jealousy for what seemed like hours.

It all started a few days ago. Him, Bucky and Y/N had just returned from a long mission. The flight home was quieter than a funeral. Y/N and Bucky sat on opposite sides. They managed to get into another typical boyfriend/girlfriend fight. Well, as typical as superheroes can get. Y/N made a plan, Bucky ignored it as he thought it was a wrong plan. Sam was just glad they were both too exhausted to continue to yell it out.

When they landed, Steve was waiting patiently for them.

“You have a guest, Y/N.”

“Really?” She chuckled softly. “Alright.”

She hung up her tactical gear, fixed up her hair, and dragged herself out of the hanger.

Sam only followed because he was so curious. He played it off as he was just getting some food from the kitchen. Bucky, on the other hand, waited for her in bed.

Sam learned she never made it back to the room. Her guest’s name was Kyle. He was Y/N’s ex-boyfriend. They stayed up the whole night catching up. Sam overheard one part of their conversation before he went to bed.

“Tony actually gave you clearance to here?”

“He gave me clearance for a few days actually! I thought it would be nice to catch up and also hang out with you!”

Sam has never seen such wider eyes once Y/N told Bucky the next day. Bucky really did his best to act happy for her. He was amazing at hiding how he truly felt. The master of building it up and pushing it down was the Winter Soldier himself. Sam knew he was gonna break.

He guess today was that day.

“I can’t believe she’s spending so much time with him” Bucky blurted out, hitting a punching bag.

“Yeah, why’s that?” Sam did his best to give a sympathetic reply.

“He’s an ex?? This “kyle” kid or whatever broke her heart, he had to. Yet they’re hanging out every second. Why is that? I think he’s trying to get back with her. They do everything together now it’s ridiculous!! I’m not even invited anymore. I’m her boyfriend, I should be with her!”

“Wow, you’re so jealous”

Bucky glared “Is there a problem with being jealous Sam? She’s my girl. No one else’s.”

Sam sighed softly. He got up, making his way to the punching bag. His large hands held it perfectly in place as Bucky landed hard, aggressive hits.

“Last night, they went out to dinner. Y/N wore a dress she’s never worn before. I complimented her and she barely said anything. Then Kyle says she’s the prettiest girl in the world and that’s when she gets all flustered?? Unbelievable!!”

“James” Sam said softly. The soldier didn't react well to his first name. Punching bag sand flew threw the air, and he painted heavily.

Falcon continued though “You never apologized on that mission. You almost got yourself killed and you brushed it off. Do you know how much that puts on her? She doesn’t wanna talk to you cause you hurt her. Kyle is a way of distracting herself from the pain, and she’s having fun-“

“She should be having fun with me”

“Holy shit how did you miss the whole point of that??”

Bucky picked up his half-empty water bottle. “I’m going to talk to her”

“Talk about apologizing?”

“No, talk about the amount of time she’s hanging out with him.”

“Okay, good luck with that”

Sergeant Barnes huffed. He spun atop his heels, heading straight for the sliding doors. The man walked with such purpose it was so hard to slow him down. With a creek, he entered the new world of the corridor. Now all he had to do was walk down the hall and into the guest room. Simple enough.

It was an easy journey for his legs. His head, not so much. His thoughts were running out of control. Both the jealous, almost horny ones and the more insecure ones.

Maybe this “Kyle” kid is a better fit for her. He doesn’t put himself in harm's way 24/7. He can admit to her when he’s messed up.

When he made it to the guest room, he immediately heard her silly snort of laughter.

She’s so happy, she deserves to be with someone who makes her happy.

“Y/N, can I be honest with you,” Kyle said softly, smiling.

“Yeah of course!!” Bucky heard her cheery voice. He’s never heard that tone when he’s around.

I never deserved her to begin with. She deserves to be happy with someone else. I should go.

“Well, I really like you, like more than a friend. And I know you have a boyfriend now, but think I can treat you better”

A glass shattered inside of Bucky. That glass was his heart. Y/N would so take the chance to be with a better man. Especially after everything he’s done to her. Worry herself to sickness, raise her anxiety levels, kill her any chance of getting a normals nights rest. Kyle would make everything normal. Kyle would make everything better for her.

The silence of the room was even more heartbreaking to Bucky. They were probably all over each other, whispering soft nothings into each other’s ears. He ran away, he couldn’t bear hearing the rest.

What really happened though, was Y/N trying to figure out the best way to deny him.

“Ah” she began “the offer is very sweet of you, but Bucky and I just click. No matter what happens, him and I are going to be together for a long time. But thank you,Kyle.”

Kyle sighed “I knew you would say that. You won’t even give me a chance?”

“As much as you seem like a lovely guy, Bucky is just the one for me. We have similar stories and share experiences.”

“I get it. I was just hoping…”

The girl patted his hand. “I hope you didn’t come all the way out just to think we would get back together. That would’ve been a waste of time.”

The ex widened his eyes. He was caught alright. And Y/N was disgusted by it. She stormed out the door faster than Bucky’s motorcycle on a beautiful sunny day. Hot tears were about to rain down. Her nose, already clogged.

The door flung open, revealing a red-eye Bucky, packing clothes for his what-he-thought-to-be new ex.

“W-what are you doing d-dumny?” She barely could reprimand

“I-I…..I-I started packing your clothes ...y-you and Kyle...looked s-so happy” Bucky weakly lifted up the bag to show her. A tiny little smile returned to her face.

“You’re so f-fuckin dumb”

Y/N collapsed into his body. His body temperature, cranked all the way up, felt so soothing to the poor sobbing human.

Bucky was so confused, but it felt so nice to have his baby girl back in his arms. His love. His doll. His.

He ran his metallic fingers right through her hair. Silky soft, and a lovely flowery smell. It helped her sobs become still.

“W-why were you packing my stuff dumbass….”

The truth had to come forward, Bucky just wasn’t so ready to tell it. “You and Kyle were just having such a good time ...and I know you’ll be mad at me once I tell you but I thought ...I thought you were going to leave me. So I packed your clothes and-“

“Bucky, why on earth would I leave you?”

“I never apologize to you. I get way too jealous. And I’m always putting you in pain and giving you extra anxiety. You deserve better than me.”

A soft kiss was placed on the man’s rosy lips. “James Buchanan Barnes, you do have an ego and you do get jealous, and some nights you make me cry so hard out of pure worry-“

“That’s why you should-“

Y/N’s finger slipped over his lips. “-But, you’ve also have given me the best memories of my life. You let me experience love like I never have before. Me and Kyle were just a fling, I broke up with him. You though, Bucky, you light up my life. You make me smile when I think I’ve forgotten how to. You make me laugh harder than I ever had. You are the reason my life has turned around. And to be honest, I like it when you get jealous”

Skinny fingers wiped under the sergeants teary eyes. They then clasped his cheeks. He made eye contact with the love of his life.

“You’re my everything, Y/N” He breathed out, very wispily.

The girl gave out a chuckle, slamming her lips into his harshly.

“Then we told each other how much we loved each other, I scared away Kyle, and then we made love”

Bucky was much happy at training then he was ever before. Sam loves to take notice of these things.

“I don’t need to know every detail of your life but thanks for the update. How’s the jealousy issue going?”

Bucky smirked “she likes it”

Y/N hugged him from behind. “Very much”

Sam laughed. “Both of you are freaks, but then you wouldn’t be my best friends”

Sam didn’t expect to have a normal training day, but he was glad it wasn’t normal. Seeing his best friends be happy with each other? He’d take that anyway.

[viktors-hexstrap]

Out Of Control

pairing: Bucky Barnes x Steve Rogers

word count: 1661

warnings: self-harm, PTSD, mentions of blood, injuries, torture and past trauma

Summary: Bucky has a panic attack where he begins to repeatedly slam his fist into the wall until it bleeds. Steve pulls him back as tears stream down Bucky’s face and all he can do is apologize profusely. More afraid that he’s disappointed Steve than that he’s hurt himself

A/N: This fanfic is based on this post by @begitalarcos , they gave me permission to turn it into a full fanfic, all credit for the plot goes to them! Also sorry this took so long to make, I had school and exams and obviously procrastination but its finally done! I hope you like it! Feedback is greatly appreciated!

After Bucky settled into the Avengers tower, things between him and Steve were…tense. Bucky knew, from the few memories he managed to get back, that he and Steve were lovers. He even felt a deep longing every time he looked at him, but it felt almost like a memory, the memory of feelings he knew used to be there but got erased by HYDRA. Despite everything though, Bucky wanted to try and rebuild something with Steve. He just didn’t know how to start, and the more memories he regained the deeper his feelings for Steve would get. ————————————————————————– This wasn’t unusual, he was used to the nightmares, not so used to the panic attacks that would follow but he managed. Usually, he would wait out the agonizingly long minutes until he calmed down. Then he’d get up and walk around the Stark tower for a bit, subconsciously seeking Steve out. Always secretly hoping he’d bump into him but too afraid to go to him directly, afraid he’d seem weak or needy or not able to deal with his problems by himself. He knew Steve wouldn’t think that of him but his pride wouldn’t take the risk. This time the nightmare was different. Normally they’d be about him back in HYDRA’s lab, being their little human experiment, getting drugged, tortured, brainwashed, everything. But tonight wasn’t just about him, now he was on a mission. The mission he was sent on to kill Steve, which he thankfully failed, but not in this dream. He was watching like a spectator trough his own eyes, unable to stop his actions, unable to stop himself from burying that knife into Steve’s chest. ‘Bucky’ he tried, not knowing his Bucky was trapped and he was talking to a mindless weapon. All he knew was that his supposedly dead lover just stabbed him without a second thought, no sign of remorse or hesitation. In his head Bucky was screaming, apologizing, feeling so powerless it was killing him, but no matter how much he shouted no words left the soldier’s mouth. He was caged within his own body, unable to do anything to save Steve and forced to watch the love of his life die, killed by his own hands. When he finally woke up, in a cold sweat, his heart was beating so fast Bucky thought it might explode -although he didn’t really care if it did- and fast was an oversimplification for how crazy his breathing was. The first thing he did was look down at his hands, trying to reassure himself it was a dream and there was no blood on them, physically at least. “Fuck,” he breathed out, running a shaky hand over his face and realizing it was wet, not due to sweat but tears, he’d been crying in his sleep. “Fuck!” he repeated, burying his face into his hands after throwing the blanket off of himself. “Stop crying, you idiot,” he said to himself, feeling pathetic. The panic attack made him feel just as out of control as the nightmare, making everything worse. There was this feeling he couldn’t really place: fear? Dread? Anxiety? He didn’t know but it was so intense it made him feel sick. The panic attacks had never been this intense before. His normal remedy for these situations was thinking of Steve, and the little memories he had of the two of them before…everything happened. But now every image of Steve in his head turned into a bloody picture of his love dying, a knife deep in his chest. Bucky got up and started pacing, or at least tried to, his legs quickly gave out on him so he put his bionic hand on the wall and leaned on it for support. “Stop it, just stop it,” he whispered to himself. He hated feeling so out of control, it terrified him. Images from the nightmare flashed in his mind and Bucky shut his eyes, trying to block them out. “Stop it!” he shouted and his free human hand hit the wall before he could realize it. The pain. ‘That’s it’ he realized, it gave him just that small sense of control he desperately needed. And so he started punching, leaving a dent that soon turned into a hole every time his fist hit the wall with superhuman strength. He was using his human arm, wanting, needing to feel the pain and see the blood his bionic arm couldn’t offer. Needing to know this was real and not another nightmare. It was just a poor attempt at feeling in control, he knew that, but it was all he had. He could control the pain, if not the panic he was feeling, or his own damn body for Christ’s sake. Or maybe he was punishing himself, for what he did to Steve or all those people he killed. All he could hear was his pounding heart and rapid breath, drowning out all other sounds but suddenly a voice interrupted. “Mr. Barnes, I know you gave me strict instructions to leave you alone, but Mr. Rogers is outside of your door, asking permission to enter.” the AI’s voice spoke. Bucky sighed, this was bad. “Keep the door locked,” he ordered with a shaky voice. Although he wanted Steve to be there, he didn’t want to be seen in the state he was, especially by him. He took a second to look at his fist. It was bloody and the skin on all his knuckles was beyond recognition. After a short-lived attempt at trying to move his fingers he realized he couldn’t. 'I deserve this’ he thought, so he kept going. But soon there was a hand gripping his own stopping it in mid-air. Bucky flinched and pulled away at the sudden touch. When he turned his head, he locked eyes with Steve, who looked hurt, confused, and everything Bucky wouldn’t have expected in that moment. 'He can’t see me like this’. His face was stained with tears, his hair a ruffled mess and his panic attack still ongoing. And to top it all off his fist was bloody and broken “Buck, what’s going on?” he asked, his tone so gentle it shocked Bucky. He tried to keep it together, not wanting to break down in front of Steve but he couldn’t stop the tears. The thought of having disappointed Steve hurt worse than any injury he could cause himself and before he realized he was muttering breathy and quick “I’m sorry"s to him. “It’s okay,” he heard Steve cut him off. He let go of his hand which dropped back by his side, numb and broken just like it’s owner was feeling. He could hear drops of blood as they fell onto the hardwood floor and out of the corner of his eye he spotted the hole he had created in the wall. It didn’t take long for Steve to figure out what was happening to Bucky so instead of asking further questions, he wrapped his arms around him, pulling the ex-soldier into a hug. Bucky was relieved, this is exactly what he needed, what he aimlessly searched for all those nights when he looked for Steve. Just this once he allowed himself to feel fully and with no holding back. He gripped at Steve’s shirt, buried his face into the crook of his neck and just cried. Let everything he’d been holding back pour out until his panic attack was over and he started to calm down. He knew he’d probably feel embarrassed about this later, but later didn’t matter to him in that moment. They stayed like that, Steve could tell when Bucky had calmed down but he didn’t move. For the first time in 70 years, Bucky felt at peace. He knew he’d have to let go, he really didn’t want to but eventually he pried himself away from Steve, wiping at his tired eyes. “This isn’t the first time this happened is it?” Steve spoke first “No.” Bucky answered simply, after a few seconds of hesitation and avoiding eye contact. “Why didn’t you come to me?” Steve asked, one hand moving to Bucky’s shoulder, the other cupping his cheek. Bucky’s body responded instantly, stepping closer to Steve, it was almost like his old self was guiding him. He liked this, being close to him. It just felt right. Bucky’s been wanting this ever since he started to get his own self back after escaping HYDRA. “I didn’t want to seem weak,” he admitted, finally working up the courage to look up at Steve, they’d gotten closer and closer without realizing, the closeness making Bucky’s heart skip a beat. “So you just kept all this to yourself until you broke down?” “I’m sorry,” Bucky said, afraid he’d disappointed him. “Don’t be, just,” Steve paused, taking a deep breath “Just know I’m here for you, always.” There was a small pause, Bucky and Steve staring at each other. During those few seconds Bucky finally understood what his feelings for Steve meant, he might not have all his memories back but he’d fallen for Steve, all over again. “I love you.” Bucky breathed out, sounding like even he was surprised by it. And he was, only then realizing what his feelings meant. Steve was taken back, smiling brightly back at the ex-soldier “I love you too, Buck.” he answered, closing the distance between them with a kiss. ********** Bonus: “How did you even get into the room? I told Jarvis to keep the door locked.” he asked Steve the next morning at breakfast. “Really? He just opened it for me.” Steve answered. “That bastard robot.” “Carefull, he can hear you,” Steve chuckled, Bucky threw a displeased look at the ceiling, showing his middle finger at the AI “He can also see you,” Steve added, laughing as he sat down across from bucky with his own breakfast. Bucky grunted, “It’s gonna take me a while to get used to all of this.”

[tony-luvv]

May 5 - No Pants Day

Warning: Cross-Dressing, Acceptance, Temptation, Bucky x Tony

Ao3 Link and Fanfiction.net Link

Tony waited for this day all year. May 5th, the day he could walk around without pants. Now for most, people would assume he walked around in his boxer briefs or something. Well...not quite. May 5th could fall on any day of the week really but most years he wasn’t so lucky to get this special day on the weekend. So a few years ago, he’d taken to wearing dresses and skirts. Technically they weren’t pants, nothing hugging between his legs. So if he was called to the office or into a meeting, he’d wear a business skirt or dress.

It certainly shocked the hell out of the board the first time he’d done it but at this point they were somewhat used to it.

Anyway, this year, May 5th was a Saturday, and yes, he was home all day...but this year he also had roommates. So a cute skirt it is!

Throwing open the doors to his closet he strode to the back where his special outfits were located. Tony has always enjoyed dressing up, so after awhile he’d taken to collecting all types of clothes and coming up with reasons to wear them. Today is a nice day, weather warming up which meant he didn’t need heavy clothing. He went with a black flared skater skirt that rested right at his belly button. The skirt stopped just shy of mid-thigh and looked good on him. He looked over his collection of tops and spotted one of his favorite band logos. A matching black tank crop-top had AC/DC printed across the chest. He threw it on and some black boots as a final touch before going to stand in front of the mirror.

Looking at his reflection he couldn’t help but pout, “What do you think FRIDAY? I feel like i’m missing something...” He spun back and forth, loving the way the skirt twisted to catch up with him.

“Maybe an accessory or two Boss, I’d say a black choker would really throw the look together.”

“Such fashion taste, have you’ve been talking to Jan again?”

“Only a little.” Tony laughed, he was so proud of his girl. Doing as suggested he grabbed a leather choker and attached it. Once it was on he went back to his accessories when he spotted them. Circular sunglasses, dark grey lens with gold outlining. Around the lens the metal frame stuck out a little with a small leaf pattern engraved along the side. He put them on.

“Okay FRIDAY, you think I’m ready now?”

He stood there in his little punk outfit, posing and modeling for the mirror and FRIDAY’s cameras.

“Magnificent Boss.”

“Well baby girl, don’t wait up.”

Leaving his room he made for the common area, it was coffee time.

When he walked in, jaws dropped. Surprisingly Thor was the first to recover, “What are you wearing Anthony?”

Of course Natasha was the only one that didn’t react like the boys did, instead she hid her snickers behind her tea cup. “Yeah Stark, where are your pants?” Tony glared at her through his shades, she knew damn well why. She was with him this same time last year!

“You know why Natashalie.” He pouted and then went to make a cup of his life juice.

That got Clint going though, he hated being left out. “Know what? Care to fill the rest of us in?”

“Well if you must know bird brain, it’s National No Pants Day.”

“So you wear women’s clothing instead?” Poor Steve, cursed to forever be confused by the 21st century.

“Well I can’t walk around in my underwear in public so I assumed the same with my new roommates. This is the next best thing.” The coffee pot dinged so he turned to make himself busy. He faintly heard Thor ask Natasha something before as they left the common floor.

In fact, he was so immersed in making his coffee he completely missed Bucky entering the room. The ex-assassin was sort of, maybe, his boyfriend. He wasn’t completely sure since they’ve only been on two dates but that was semantics. James entered the room, spotting Tony at the same moment Clint and Steve spotted him, it seemed like everyone froze (except Tony who was oblivious to the whole encounter). Bucky’s eyes greedily took in his outfit, hungry eyes trialing over his body and the skin exposed. When his smile turned shark like and predatory, the two blondes took off running. Fleeing the scene as fast as they could before they witness something they weren’t prepared to see.

The sound of scrapping chairs and running feet had Tony cluing back into his surroundings. He turned to see Clint and Steve retreating backs and then nearly bumped into Bucky who was standing right behind him.

“James!” He jumped, almost dropping his coffee mug. It was only Bucky’s fast reflexes that saved his favorite mug from a terrible demise. “Hi, um, g-good morning.”

James leaned in, morning voice deep and sexy, “Mornin’ doll. Wha’s got you all dressed up an’ pretty?” He’s cheeks warmed under Bucky’s heated stare.

“Oh, it’s a – well today’s…no pants day.” He kept looking down, unable to look his crush, man – person in the face. Embarrassment making him nervous and fidgety.

James stepped even closer, – how was that even possible, he was already so close! –  right into his space and his metal arm curled around his exposed waist. The cool metal chilled his skin causing goosebumps to rise and make him shiver. “You look gorgeous like that baby doll. Is this the only time you wear skirts or will this become a regular thing?” Tony was freaking out, did James really like it or did he want Tony to stop? He was going to tell him, stuttering like the mess he is and tell him not often but James beat him to the punch. Leaning in close, mouth to his ear, “I really hope this becomes a regular thing.”

“I have more!” He froze, shocked that he just said that. Bucky froze too but for the only reason Tony wasn’t thinking of. While every negative response filtered through Tony's mind, James was trying his best not to pop a boner at all the sexy little outfits he imagined Tony could be hiding from him.

“Will you show me?” Tony jerked back to look up at James, eyes locking with Bucky’s grey-blue ones over the rims of his sunglasses. It was crazy, he’d only know the Winter Soldier for a few months and dated him a week or two but something about this man stole all his words. He swallowed the ball of nerves in his throat and nodded, making Bucky smile. The taller man leaned down, flesh hand tilting his head up and kissed him sweetly. “Lead the way doll.”

God he loved those lips, he pushed up for another kiss. Just a press of lips that made him smile. Then he grabbed the flesh hand off his face and used it to drag the other man to the elevator.

When they got upstairs Tony led him to his bedroom and to his walk in closet where he’d been not even an hour ago. “It’s all right here.” James didn’t let go of his hand but he did look over his wardrobe. Eyes scanning different dresses and skirts, matching tops to go along and…shoes.

“You have heels too?” Tony flushed again at the incredulity in Bucky’s voice. James quickly noticed and turned to him, squeezing his hand, “Hey, I was just surprised, I didn’t mean to sound rude or anything. Okay?” He even crouched down a little to get Tony to look at him.

He smiled and James smiled back, “Okay.”

“Will you model some for me?”

“Sure.”

Tony went about changing, he had a lounge chair in there so he made sure James was settled before he started. Modelling shows for his friends was pretty common occurrence for Tony so he actually had one of those wooden folded panels to change behind while James waited. He’s extremely grateful he got it now, otherwise he doesn’t think he’d be able to handle James watching him.

For his first outfit he put on thin strap gladiator sandal heels and a white long sleeve pencil dress. He flattened out the dress taking in a deep breath before moving around the barrier. His hands gripped the edges of his sleeves nervously as he walked closer to Bucky.

“What do you think?” Carefully, he spun around, letting James see every side of him.

“Whoa, damn Tony I think I have a new kink…” He stared, drinking in the sight Tony presented. The white hugging him beautifully and curved around his ass. It took all of Bucky’s self-control to stay in that chair and not jump Tony’s bones. The white looked good on him, making his tan skin stand out against the clean white fabric. Fuck his legs looked so fucking juicy– “Did you shave your legs?”

“Oh, well I did it once a long time ago. Haven’t stopped doing it since.” Tony leaned back a little, looking down his body at his hairless legs, “Is it too weird?”

“Honey I was born during the depression, died in a world war, spent years as a mindless puppet of a Nazi terrorist group and currently work part time as a super hero with the coolest metal arm in history. Nothing is weird anymore. If you like it than I like it.”

Tony had stood there listening to James, arms crossed as he nervously bit his lip. But by the end, he was smiling brightly down at the other man. Unable to help himself, he walked over, standing next to the lounge chair he leaned down to kiss this perfect man. Bucky’s hand came out, rubbing and caressing the back of his thigh. He leaned back, enough to look James in the eye when he whispered, “Thank you.”

After a few more shared kisses Tony went back to changing outfits. His next dress was a grey slash neck knitted dress and grey low top converse sneakers. With a little more confidence he came around the divide strutting. Making a show of swinging his hips and circling the room.

James squirmed in his seat, “Damn I’m going to have to start calling you kitten.”

Tony grinned, walking over to James he dropped down to his knees before the man and ran one hand up his leg. As best as he could, he looked up under his lashes and squeezed the calve in his hand, “Meow.”

Bucky’s entire body twitched and Tony jumped back laughing, “That wasn’t very nice kitten.” James was definitely pouting at him.

“I’m sorry but you literally set yourself up for that one.”

“Yeah, yeah, next please.”

For his next outfit he grabbed a floral fit and flare dress. The front covered his chest and sat higher, leaving little spaghetti straps to cover his shoulders and leave a lot of his back exposed. Like all the other dresses it stopped mid-thigh but this one held a cute white flowers over a dark purple background. He put heels on again, white ankle strap and open toed heels that went perfectly.

When he finished dressing he moved to the mirror instead of Bucky, twisting and turning like he did in his skirt this morning. James joined him at the mirror. “You really do look beautiful doll.” Tony blushed, loving how James complimented him. It made something warm flutter in his chest every time he spoke. Tony turned around, facing James head on. Blush be damned, “I love you.” Bucky looked at him, eyes wide in surprise and Tony found himself fumbling to explain, “I know we’ve barely dated and that things can’t be easy for you after everything but I really mean it. I love you James.”

A big solid body pushed him back into the cold surface of the mirror and kissed him. Lips angel soft and tongue sinful as hell as it devoured him, “God you are so beautiful and I love you too Tony. I love you so much.”

[tilltheendwilliwrite]

Balance on the Head of a Pin

Chapter Twenty Nine

Previous Chapter

Pairing: Loki Laufeyson x OFC  |  Word Count: 6671 Warnings: Swearing, Angst, Talk of Drug Use and Abuse

On his way back to the music room Loki searched every inch of the house, startling a few maids when he popped into rooms unannounced. There was nothing, and no one had seen anything suspicious or out of the ordinary besides himself appearing out of thin air. Still, as he went, he warded every door and every window until all that remained open were those meant to have guests going in and out. Should anyone besides the household staff, family, or Avengers venture beyond what he'd marked, or try in any way to reach the family wing where the children slept, he would know instantly. The house now hummed with his magic.

The others were waiting when he arrived. “Anything?” Loki asked, already knowing the answer by the looks on the faces of those around him.

“Nothing,” Steve said. “A few tracks in the grass and Nat found Lauren’s shoes, but otherwise everything was quiet.”

“No one saw anything down at the barns, either. Left the box with someone who said they’d take the kittens to Teddy,” Bucky added.

Thor leaned against the piano. “The women with the children said the man was new. Neither of them had seen him at one of these events before. His accent was not from around here, and he arrived late. But he came dressed as a clown and performed well, so they thought nothing of it. Simply assumed Magnolia had hired an extra entertainer this year though she hasn’t in previous ones. They did a quick headcount and all the children except Sara were present. We played it off as Sara leaving to show off her balloon animal to Lauren and a little concern she'd done so, so easily resulting in new vigilance on their part. But this,” he threw the discarded clown suit and wig on the floor, “was found in the bathroom nearest the children. Along with makeup saturated facial tissues and this.” A cufflink winked in Thor's hand.

“There are a few cameras around the house,” Tony muttered, giving the thin piece of plastic that was his phone a flick. “Enough to find this.”

The image of the hallway which led to where the children were playing appeared. Down it walked a man in a suit, his hair dark and body turned away from the camera. He ducked swiftly into the bathroom, a protruding belly present. A quick time jump showed him coming back out, dressed in the costume laying on the floor, nowhere near as fat as previously.

“Clever,” Natasha murmured. “Disguise the costume as a beer gut. Freeze it there.” She took a step closer and peered at the image. “Even the makeup is perfect. This was no amateur. Likely he stashed his suit in there while he made friends with the kids.”

“No camera in that room but when I backtrack…” A new image appeared, the patio earlier in the evening when the arrivals were coming in groups. “He waltzed right on in,” Tony said, displeasure in every syllable.

“Freeze it again,” Nat said. “Gimme both images.”

The two faces appeared together, and Bucky swore. “Prosthetics!”

“Not in this one.” Natasha pointed at the clown. “I'd bet money they were water soluble and went down the toilet.”

“What about when he left?” Steve asked.

Tony gave his phone a swipe. “The door she should have gone out is there, straight ahead and just around that corner, but little miss pink is caught… here.”

They watched Sara run nearly straight into Sue Ann who gave her a scolding and shooed her away down the hall.

“Something about… Miss Lauren’s not going to be outside… who you think you're fooling,” Bucky trailed off. “Not Clint. Can't read lips that well.”

“Better than me,” Thor offered.

As Sue Ann and Sara left the frame, the smiling clown stepped out the door and quickly made his way back to the bathroom. A few moments later, a much more sleek gentleman walked out in a suit, his paunch missing, as he made his way toward the back of the house. There was a brief pause as he lifted his wrist to his mouth.

“You see her… something indistinct… on the move,” Bucky continued to translate.

“There are no cameras pointed where we need them but… I found a handily passing satellite and hacked us an image. It’s not great, but it's something.”

“Tony.” Steve sighed.

“What? It’s one of ours, so who cares?”

Loki certainly didn’t as he stepped closer to have a better look. So far he approved of how things had been handled. There was no point in starting a panic when it was unneeded. The men were gone, empty-handed, and the strong foreboding had gone with them.

The image he examined with care. It was early in the moment. Lauren just arriving at Sara’s location. Two bodies were waiting further back in the maze, while a third was exiting the house. “Look, here is a four, and here a fifth. Both stationed to watch the main exits of the house.”

“Sniper positions,” Bucky agreed. “It's where I'd a planted myself. Surprised you can see them. Pretty damn dark.”

“There is darkness where there should not be. Lauren and I rode this trail,” he pointed out the path, “And this vantage point makes the most sense.” He indicated the other hard to see dark spot.

“Roll it forward,” Steve commanded.

“Still images only so it will be jerky,” Tony warned.

They jumped through, watching Lauren run, move through the maze with a clear goal in mind. The two in the tree line never moved as the other three closed in. It appeared they had also studied the maze at some point as they made their way through it with relative ease.

Loki's fists slowly clenched as remembered fear filled him.

Finally, the image of Lauren and Sara vanished as his arrival and their departure was very quick, but how close the men had been to his Ástvinur angered him further. The men remained visible for one more frame before the two in the trees vanished, the three in the maze crossed the grounds, and all disappeared, their prey now gone.

“Fast,” Bucky muttered. “Under three minutes for extraction. They were gone before we hit the door.”

“Definitely professionals,” Natasha agreed.

“But why Sara?” Loki asked, trying to settle his rage. For the moment things were calm. Usun was with the children, and the hound would not let harm come to them. Lauren was with them and safe, and the house was so well guarded it seemed to breathe with magic.

“Tony, you said the mother was a lawyer? Could it have something to do with her or a case she's working?” Steve asked.

“Possibly. She’s had some big league prosecutions in the past,” Tony muttered, flicking through files on his phone. “She’s not currently on or worked any cases lately that would see her on someone’s shit list that I can tell, but I’ll dig deeper, and the husband’s a finance guy,” he squinted a little at something he was reading, “a shitty one by the looks of it from Annadale’s accounts. Pepper’s going to have her work cut out for her if she ever took a look at this mess. Probably best to have FRIDAY just run the numbers. You hear that, my girl? Be a dear and clean up this mess so it makes sense.”

“On it, boss,” came the voice of the AI.

“Thank you, darling. You know you’re my favourite.”

“I'll be certain to inform Ms. Potts of your opinion, sir,” she teased in her way.

“Just for that, you can run facial on our clown at the same time,” he huffed.

“Like I wasn't already?” she quipped.

“The brother-in-law has aspirations toward your politics,” Loki murmured, stepping back from the image as it disappeared.

“Governor, I’m aware. Still, he’s nowhere near a position of power. He’s a finance guy and a crappy one from what I can see.” Tony flicked the phone again and had new images pop up. “Samuel Avirett is nothing more than a CFP. How the hell does he expect to break into politics? He’s got no military experience, his major was all wrong, he’s never volunteered a day in his life, and from what I remember… he’s an ass.”

“I agree with you there,” Loki muttered. “Wait…” He reached up and pulled down one of Tony’s floating files. “He works for Montgomery? Doing what?”

“CFP. He’s a certified financial planner.”

“Money,” Loki hissed, feeling a twist of foresight hovering just out of his reach. There was something there. Something insidious. “It all comes back to money.”

“What do you mean, brother?” Thor asked, straightening off the piano.

“Lauren’s ex. His plan to get her back had to do with money. His lack of it, and his owing of it to the wrong people.”

Bucky shifted enough to catch his eye. “This have to do with that text you sent me?”  

“Yes.” Loki nodded.

“You take care of it?” The cold of the Winter Soldier rested in those words.

“Of course.” Loki wasn’t insulted by his question, knowing how dear Lauren was to the man.

“What am I missing?” Steve inquired.

“Nothing of relevance. George Montgomery is no longer in the picture. He was sent packing with his tail tucked firmly between his legs,” Loki stated. “However, this connection between Montgomery and the Avirett’s cannot be overlooked. Something about it… resonates for me.”

“You gotta feelin’?” Bucky asked.

“Oh, not another one!” Natasha huffed. “It’s bad enough with the two fossils!”

“Say what now?” Tony asked at the same time.

Thor walked across the room to stand with Loki. “My brother has inherited our mother’s gift of foresight thanks to his binding. He is showing the makings of a great Seer. One equal to her.”

“You boast of things yet unknown, Thor. So far, they are feelings, impressions. Premonitions if you like. Sara’s appearance at the party tonight… aroused this state. The storm that is brewing around this house is another. And now, a third arises with this,” he flicked the file back toward the others where they all winked out of existence. “What happened tonight with Sara, it is only the beginning. What comes next… will see blood spilled.”

“You’re sure of this?” Steve asked.

“As sure as I can be. This is all very… new. I am not Frigga.” Admitting to his lack of knowledge left a poor taste in his mouth.

“How do you inherit power from a woman who wasn’t actually your mother?” Tony asked.

The bluntness of the question, whether intended or not, hit Loki like a physical blow. “Just because she did not birth me, does not mean she was not my mother. We shared a bond through magic.”

“Great, more bonds,” Natasha muttered.

“Shut up, Nat,” Bucky sighed. “Your cynicism is showing.”

“Pardon me for having feelings on the matter,” she huffed.

“Natasha,” Thor said, and it was a rumble in the room, a sound of power and displeasure. “I will not have this conversation with you again. Loki is not who he was. He is the restored prince of Asgard, and as you respect me, you will respect him.”

“Respect is earned, Thor,” Loki murmured, his voice the cooling breeze which rode upon the thunder’s wave. “I have yet to earn that from Ms. Romanoff. Perhaps I never will. All I seek is the holding of her tongue around my Ástvinur.”

Bucky chuckled softly at the stunned faces around him. “You two been holding out on us?”

“Thor and I have had centuries of time to perfect our ability to work together. We were brothers far longer than we were not.” A fact most of them had forgotten.

“I’d like to see that,” Steve said cautiously, but the small smile on his lips showed he meant it sincerely.

“Perhaps one day you will, Captain, but first this,” Loki waved his hand at the costume, “incident needs to be resolved. Tomorrow is the fair and such in the town. Lauren has already promised the children they could go. I know she will not want to change her mind but will if she has any reason to doubt their safety.”

“Then we go with her. If they came at the kid once, they’ll likely try again,” Bucky said.

“And if they don't?” Natasha asked.

“Lauren and I will extend our stay until the matter is resolved. I will not allow anyone to take or hurt these children.”

“Nice of you to be so worried about someone else's children. You certainly weren't a few years ago.”

“Natasha!” Lauren gasped, having arrived silently in the doorway.

The blood drained from Nat’s face. “Lauren… I…”

Loki turned to see her standing there looking pale and dishevelled. The hem of her dress was dirty and too long without her shoes, her makeup was smudged, and her hair had come loose to tumble in waves and curls over her shoulder. Yet, still, she was radiant.

“Darling,” he said softly, moving toward her.

When he arrived at her side, she clutched at his arms like her very being depended on it. “Loki, I would really like it if you’d find Pepper and talk to her about that thing we discussed.”

“Lauren-” he began, but her fingers landed lightly on his lips, stifling his words.

“I have somethin’ to say to the team, my love,” she murmured, gliding her fingertips over his jaw. “And I’d very much appreciate you lettin’ me do it alone while you squared things with Pepper.”

There was a fire in her eyes, an unholy anger he had never before witnessed. It sent a shiver of heat up his spine. Her touch burned a path through his blood until it felt as if her fingers were wrapped around the rapidly growing erection in his drawers. “My Valkyrie,” he whispered, turning his lips to her palm. “Let me fix your dress before I go. Will you find me in the ballroom when you are finished? I’ve warded every inch of the house. I promise the children are as safe as if I held them in my arms.”

“I will, and I know. I can feel you in the walls, Loki. I want a dance with my husband,” she said just as softly. “I want a moment of peace and a minute to forget what could have happened. I want you.”

“Darling,” he sighed. “How do you expect me to walk away now?”

“One step at a time, Loki.” She smiled and gently patted his cheek.

His magic swirled up as he ducked his head and kissed her deeply, taking his time to clean and repair what her frantic flight had wrought while he enjoyed the sweet flavour of her lips. When he finished, she was as pristine and immaculate as she had been earlier. “One last thing,” he said as he called her shoes to his hand and knelt at her feet to help her into them.

It was deliberately done, something which caused his brother to inhale sharply in surprise, for Loki knelt to no one. He could have easily returned her shoes to her with magic, but this way he had a chance to make sure she hadn't injured her feet without yet knowing, for even now he could feel the adrenaline spiking for her.

Once he’d finished, Lauren stroked her fingertips over his cheek. He caught her hand and kissed her palm again before rising to his feet and pressing another to her cheek where he whispered in her ear, “Be gentle.”

She only eyed him with that same fire when he pulled away and left the room, not bothering to listen. She’d asked for him to step away and he would.

***

Lauren took a deep breath and turned to face the people she cherished most in the world. “This is so not the time for this. It's not the time for petty bickerin’ and squabbles, but y’all can't seem to let it go, so fine. Let's have it out. By now, I’m sure y’all are well aware of my life, my family, and where I came from. Why I ever thought I could keep it a secret,” she shook her head at her own foolish desires, “I don’t know.”

“Lauren,” Steve said, stepping toward her.

She pinned him in place with a look. “Shut up, Steven. I get to talk now.”

His mouth gaped for a moment before his teeth closed with a click.

“Four years ago I walked into the tower scared out of my ever-lovin' mind. I had no idea what to expect when Pepper asked me to come work for Tony. Hard work? Sure. Long hours? Most likely. People I thought were intimidatin’ as hell? Absolutely.” She looked from Tony to Natasha, to Steve, and finally to Bucky for whom she smiled. “What I didn’t expect to find was a home and a family. People who I'd come to cherish and who cared for me like my own… couldn’t.”

When her chin quivered, Bucky crossed the room and took her hand in support. “We love you too, Gilli.”

“I know, Buck. That’s why this hurts so damn much.” The tears tipped over and dripped from her chin when she turned her gaze to the three across the room. “I found out from Thor tonight that I’m what he calls a truth speaker, so let’s talk a little truth. Loki ain’t what you think he is. Not at all. He’s good, and kind, and carin’, and he loves me with his whole heart. I love you, Nat, but this mean, nasty thing you’ve got goin’ on… it’s beneath you.”

“Lauren.” The redhead’s mouth also closed quickly when Lauren glared her down.

“You’re tryin’ to shove a square peg in a round hole, Nat. Loki won’t fit no matter how hard you go at him. That person you saw in New York? That man who stood in Germany and demanded people kneel? That’s not him. It never was.”

“Lauren, we were there. We saw it! You can’t defend someone from something that happened!” Tony snapped.

“Y’all are so quick to judge, yet each and every one of you are missin’ the big picture. You’re blinded by your own experiences, but you forget the most important part.” She shook her head sadly.

“What part, Lauren?” Steve asked. “What are we missing?”

The smile she gave him was sad. “I thank you, Captain, for attemptin’ an effort. You have your own misgivin’s about Loki, but you do try.” She turned her gaze to Thor. “I adore you Thor, but even you’ve missed it.”

“Little sister? Tell me?” he asked, taking her other hand.

“I can’t tell you. It’s not my story to tell.” She turned finally to Bucky. “You are,” her breath hitched, “my best friend beside Sadie. I love you like the brother you’ve become, James. From the very start, you’ve been in my corner and on my side. You’ve trusted me when my choice was the untenable one for everyone else. You’ve given Loki the benefit of the doubt when you didn’t have to. You defend him, and you offer him inclusion when it would be really, really easy to turn away. I will never be able to thank you for that.” Pressing up on her toes, she kissed his cheek.

“That sounds suspiciously like you’re saying goodbye, Gilli,” Bucky said softly. “You aren’t thinking of leaving us now, are you?”

“I’m goin’ to Asgard once this is resolved.” She held up her hand when the protests started. “This has been really hard on my ��stvinur. Really hard. Havin’ so few people in either of my families welcome or appreciate him has made it that much harder. You don’t have to like it. You don’t have to understand it. But you will have to accept it. This is my life, and Loki is my choice!” she snapped, losing some of the sad as anger surged. “I ain’t like the rest of you. I’m not a genius, or a spy, or a super soldier, but I’m not some blonde, bimbo Barbie who doesn’t know her own goddamn mind! I am not a child, or a possession, or somethin’ in need of protectin’, and havin’ y’all second-guess the decision I made, one which made me stupidly happy before y’all showed up, really pisses me off!”

“Lauren, you have to let us catch up,” Steve said, holding up his hands pleadingly.

“Then catch the hell up, Steven! Cause nothin’ any of you say is gonna change the fact that Loki is mine! Mine, by the Fates! Mine!” She stomped her foot and at the same time in the distance, the horses fussed causing the sound to register faintly beyond the windows. It wasn’t an unusual occurrence, so when the noise didn’t continue, Lauren ignored it. If it was someone creeping around who didn’t belong, the thoroughbreds were spooky enough to continue their ruckus.

She took a deep breath when Bucky squeezed her hand. “You’re the family I never thought I’d find. I cherish each and every one of you, but if y’all can’t accept that Loki and I are together and we are happy, then I won’t be back to the tower.”

“Lauren!” Natasha gasped, looking horrified.

“You’re my friend, Nat, a real good one, but Loki is my future. If y’all can’t let this go, if you keep whippin’ this dead horse, you’ll leave me no choice.”

“Why can’t you tell us what we’re missing, then?” asked Tony, drawing her attention from a distressed Natasha.

“You’re the genius, Tony. Figure it out.”

He huffed and turned away. “This is stupid. You leave for four days and everything changes.”

“Imagine what it would be like if I was gone for months,” she quipped and turned away. “Lost and thought forgotten… or dead.”

“Lauren?” Thor grabbed her arm before she could leave. “This… this you speak of Loki.”

She arched a brow and shrugged a shoulder. “It is not my story to tell, Thor.”

“Little sister, I beg you. What didn’t he tell me?” Thor pleaded.

Lauren only reached up to cup his cheek. “Ask him.”

“What? Ask him what, Lauren?”

Thor’s eyes beseeched her, but she couldn’t break Loki’s confidence and only sighed. “You know what to ask him.”

“His Jotun form?”

She tilted her head as a final swell of words seemed to buzz on her tongue like bees wishing to be free. Lauren looked back at the rest, at the family hurting as she was. “I can’t give you the answers you seek, but only one more question. Why then? Why wait so long to invade Earth when Loki had fallen from the Bifröst months prior.”

She stepped away from everyone and lifted her chin. “Thank y’all for tonight. For lookin’ after Sara, and I’m sure for helpin’ figure this out because I sure as hell haven’t gotta clue what's happenin’. I’d appreciate it if you didn’t ask mama any questions about the-the balloon man. I saw the schedule for tonight and can assure you he wasn’t hired for this party. Who he was or where he came from…” she lifted helpless hands and let them fall, “I don’t know. Askin’ mama will only have her flyin’ into a panic.”

“What about your sister?” Bucky asked.

“I’ll deal with Marabeth,” Lauren said though she wasn’t looking forward to it. “I'll deal with all of them when this ends.”

“Lauren?”

She looked to a teary-eyed Natasha.

“Please don’t leave,” she whispered, striding across the expanse of the music room.

Lauren smiled sadly. “Your hate drives me away, Natasha.”

“I don’t… I just… Clint,” she sighed, and Lauren stiffened.

“You act like Clint was the only one the Chitauri hurt with the sceptre,” Lauren fairly snarled as she stepped back. “When you know nothin’ of anyone else’s pain.” She jerked her hands away from Natasha’s grasping ones and left the room nearly as angry as she had been when she’d arrived.

There was no way she could return to the party in this state and headed away from it, back to her father’s study where she knew she could escape for a moment to compose herself.

The whole sordid mess was too much. It felt as if someone had turned the world topsy-turvy and Lauren felt off-kilter. Completely at a loss. Adrift in an unknown sea. How was she ever again to find her balance in a world gone mad?

Nothing made sense. Nothing but Loki.

She gave the door to her father’s office a shove and stopped dead. “Jesus Christ, Priscilla!”

***

“What the hell is she talking about, Thor?” Tony snapped, clearly upset.

“I don’t know,” the big Asgardian sighed. “But there is something we have all overlooked, apparently.”

“Well, would you just ask him already!” Natasha huffed. “She can’t leave!”

Bucky scrubbed his hand over his face and sighed. “Yeah, Nat, she can. And if you keep pushing at her and snarking at Loki, she will. She’s just stubborn enough to go through with it. I don’t want to lose her any more than any of you, but she’s right. Your attitude sucks.”

“Bite me, Barnes,” she huffed but it was lacking conviction.

“Thor,” Steve spoke up, “Will you ask him? He’ll be more inclined to talk to you than he will one of us.”

“When the time is right.”

“Thor…” Steve sighed when the big blond only pulled himself up to his full height.

“You ask me to once again disrupt their binding day? After Lauren nearly loses a child, one she holds dear? After Loki could have lost them both? You want me to drag him to the side and demand answers to something he clearly does not wish to tell me? I won’t do it.” He shook his head. “Today should be full of joy, instead… Lauren’s eyes are washed with tears.”

“You can’t blame us for someone trying to take Sara,” Natasha said softly.

“No, but I can blame you for hurting Lauren more. He may not be your favorite person in the world, Natasha, but Loki is not the problem here.”

Hurt flashed over her face before she locked it all away.

“Look,” Bucky sighed, holding up his hands before anyone else could speak and cause more hurt feelings. “This is happening. It’s done. She made her choice and her choice was Loki. You can fight her, them, on this, or we can accept it and keep her in our lives while making room for Loki. I ain’t got the bias the rest of you do. I can only judge on what I’ve seen with my own eyes, and what I see is a man who loves deeply.”

“Buck.”

“Nah, punk. This time, you need to listen. They’ve been saying it since we got here. They are happy. Lauren isn’t stupid. We’ve all said she sees things we don’t from a different perspective, so if we trust her, why ain’t we trusting her now?”

Tony flopped down on the piano seat with a sigh. “I hate it when the Tin Man makes sense.”

“You just do not like being wrong,” Thor chuckled.

“Alright, jerk,” Steve huffed at Bucky. “If you’re so smart, what do we do?”

“You accept the inevitable and everyone figures out how to apologize to Lauren,” Bucky glared at the three of them, “and mean it.”

***

The man who had her sister propped on her father’s desk, plowing a furrow between her thighs gave a yelp as he pulled out.

“You’d best tuck and zip, Jasper Rubin!” Lauren huffed as she stormed into the room, dragged Cissy off the desk and thrust her into a chair while giving Jasper a solid swat to the back of his head. “And you’d best pray I don’t tell your mama just what shenanigans you’ve been gettin’ up to tonight! Now git!”

He scurried red-faced from the room without so much as a word.

Lauren stomped after him and slammed the door with extreme prejudice before rounding on her sister. “What the hell has gotten into you?”

“Prissy bitch! What gives you the right to stop me havin’ some fun?” Cissy snorted.

Lauren frowned at her sister’s glassy eyes and walked closer to grasp Cissy’s chin and wrench her face up. “Are you drunk?”

Cissy only laughed.

“You're high!” Lauren gasped, almost falling into the chair beside her sister. “Oh, god… I don't need this tonight,” she moaned, dropping her head to her hands.

“Has Loki finally come to his senses and dumped your ass… boo… lu?” Cissy giggled.

“No, Priscilla!” Lauren snapped. “But someone tried to kidnap Sara, so how's about for once in your miserable life you think of someone other than yourself!”

“What?”

The word was soft, barely a whisper, and resonated fear. Lauren looked up in time to watch Cissy pale.

“You don't actually hate them, do you?”

Cissy scrubbed a hand over her mouth. “Of course not! I just… ain't good with them. They're loud and messy!”

“So were you once,” Lauren scoffed.

“Bite your tongue! I was not,” Cissy huffed.

“Yes, Priscilla, you were. You were messy and adorable and just so damn beautiful and all I wanted was to love you but all I got was hate!” Lauren sobbed as the entire night broke over her.  “I thought you were gonna be the answer to my every prayer because God saw fit to give me a little sister I could love and cherish when my big sister only hated me, but then Marabeth filled your ear full of her lies, her grey truths and pretty soon I was gettin’ it from all three of you. I'd a stood between you and mama, between you and Marabeth because, goddammit, Priscilla, I loved you! I'd a given you the world, I'd a given you everythin’, but all you wanted was my shame and my tears.”

“You're so full of it,” she sighed. “You hated me cause mama loved me. She replaced you with me.”

“That ain’t nothin’ but more of Marabeth’s lies. At what point in time did it ever look like mama loved me?” Lauren asked as she wiped her face with her palm.

Cissy tossed her the box of tissues. “Before I was born.”

“You mean the years when I was punished for puttin’ my elbows on the tables or trackin’ dirt on floors she didn’t do the cleanin’ of? Or maybe when she'd whoop my ass cause I missed a dance step? Or maybe it was all the times she told me I was worthless cause I wasn't Marabeth. That I needed to do more, be better, try harder. Do you know how many times mama has hugged me, Cissy?”

Her sister's eyes were much less glassy, whatever high Cissy was riding appearing to fade as she stared at Lauren, her mouth open in shock while she shook her head.

“I do. I can count them on one hand. They were all public. A great showin’ of pride.” Lauren ticked them off on her fingers. “She hugged me at the Debutantes Ball, when I accepted George's proposal, at our engagement party, and tonight, right before she told me to break things off with Loki as I would now be pursuin’ Thor. So you tell me, Cissy. Does that sound like a woman who loves her knee-baby?”

“Sheeet…” Cissy breathed.

“Then there's the fact mama was fuckin’ George behind my back.” The words were out before she could stop them.

“Oh, my god…” Cissy gasped. “Does daddy know?”

Lauren sighed and rubbed her temples. “Yeah… now. He found out ‘bout the same time I did.”

“Fuckin’ hell…” she whispered.

“Watch your mouth, Priscilla.”

She snorted a small laugh. “You said it first.”

Lauren watched her a moment. “What is all this, Cissy? The drinkin’. The drugs. Screwin’ Jasper Rubin?” She shuddered in distaste. “What's goin’ on with you?”

“What happened with Sara?” she countered.

Lauren frowned, unwilling to let it go now that Cissy was actually talking to her, but gave Cissy what she knew. There had been a clown suit on the floor in the music room, so clearly, they’d found something but Lauren remained in the dark yet on what that was. “Someone lured her outside. I saw her leave the house and followed, managed to catch up to her in the maze but by the time I figured out what was happenin’, there were already people in the maze with us. Then Loki ended up havin’ to rescue us both cause Marabeth had all the gates out of the maze locked.”

“We have to do somethin’! Why are you just sittin’ here? We should be huntin’ the asshole down.” Cissy lurched to her feet.

Lauren shoved her back into the chair. “Priscilla… half the Avengers are stayin’ here or did you fail to notice Steve, Bucky, Tony, Natasha, and Pepper wanderin’ around along with Thor and Loki?”

“Huh?” she squeaked.

“How long have you been high?” Lauren barked. “What the hell did you take?”

“Just… just some E ‘bout the time you brought my dress. How else was I gonna make it through one of these things?”

“Freyja’s tits,” she sighed, rubbing her face. “How long’s this been goin’ on, Cissy? The booze and everythin’?”

“What's it matter?”

Lauren slammed her hand down on the arm of the chair. “It matters cause you're my sister and I care!”

“You didn't much care when your fiancé threatened to wring my neck!”

“Of course I did! I laid into him just fine after you left, but he ain't human! He's an Asgardian and they can all be a bunch of rock headed cavemen when they wanna be, but damn it, Cissy. You kinda deserved it. Threatenin’ me and tryin’ to steal from me? Why?”

“Because you left!” she bellowed. “You walked out and ran off to your big city life and left me here to become… you!” she sneered as tears threatened. “Who do you think took the brunt of it when mama and Marabeth needed a scapegoat? Who do you think they turned on with their crazy?”

“You didn't have to stay, Cissy.”

“And where was I supposed to go at seventeen? To you?” She snorted out a laugh. “Naw, it was easier to stay. I finished school. Made some new friends. Picked up a new hobby. All I had to do was look pretty and the boys came to me. Bought me drinks. Gave me stuff.” She leaned forward to pluck a few tissues from Lauren’s lap. “Partyin’ was easy. It was fun. Mama was easier to deal with when I was high. Smoke a little dope, and she could scream and cuss all she liked. What did I care? But then the parties weren't so fun anymore. I suddenly had to pay for my pleasure. The guys got me hooked, poor little rich girl, and my free ride was over. But Mama and Daddy are so damn tight with their money! Every advance off a credit card had to be accounted for. Every withdrawal from the bank was another round of “What god awful thing you buy this time?” And there was no way I could access my trust fund. I've got three more years until it matures, and I can leave this shithole town. But by the time I realized the cost... it was too late. I liked my parties a little too much, the dope and the E. So I took this or that, whatever had value, and pawned it so I could party.”

Lauren could only stare in horror at her words. “Oh, Cissy…”

She smiled and it was brittle. “Tonight you walked in on my transactional relationship with Jasper. Ain't the first time he's paid his way between my thighs. The E just makes it all easier.”

The face of her sister was like that of a porcelain doll which had been dropped. It seemed to crack before Lauren’s very eyes until bit by bit it fell to pieces beneath a flood of tears.

“Oh, sugar,” Lauren reached out and grabbed her hands. “We're gonna get you some help.  Okay, Cissy? You gonna let me help you?”

“No.”

“Cissy!” Lauren gasped. “You gotta!”

“No, I don't, because I already helped myself.” She pushed to her feet. “I hated you, Lauren. Despised everythin’ about you. You left and I hit rock bottom. You came back and made me realize.... I hate what I’ve become more. I ain't ever been called a whore before, but I guess I am one.”

“Cissy, no!” Lauren pushed to her feet and reached out.

“What you said about growin’ up? Takin’ responsibility? You're right. I called a facility and checked myself in. I was already flyin’ so they offered to send someone to get me. She'll be here,” she glanced at the clock, “any minute.”

“Cissy… I,” Lauren swallowed back her tears.

“This was my last hurrah. I cleaned out my stash of E… I think… but would you…?” She looked up pleadingly.

Lauren nodded. “I'll make sure. I'll get Loki to make sure it's all gone. Promise me you'll text me when you get there?” She stepped into Cissy and hugged her tight.

“Yeah. Lauren?”

“Yeah, sugar?”

“I don't hate you. I envy your life.”

Lauren tucked her face into Cissy's hair. “I know, baby, but I'm so damn proud of you.” She stepped back and cupped Cissy’s cheeks. “I know not everythin’s gonna be resolved with a round of tears and I’m sorries, but I do love you, Cissy. You’re my little sister.”

Cissy’s eyes filled with fresh tears. “I’m sorry I hated you. I’m sorry I let Marabeth twist everythin’ up. I didn’t wanna believe her but… she made it…”

“Easy to believe. I know, hun.” Lauren brushed away her tears. “Marabeth’s good at that. I don’t blame you for believin’ her. You were just little.”

She shook her head. “You’re beau was right. I let her opinion matter more than mine. I’m sorry, Lauren.”

“It doesn’t matter anymore,” Lauren said with a watery smile. “You go get help, and we’ll work on us when you get back.”

“Okay,” Cissy whispered.

“Wanna know a secret before you go?” Her blue eyes twinkled the way Lauren remembered seeing them do as a child.

“Gossip? Spill!”

“I'm not really engaged to Loki.”

“What!” she barked.

“We're already married,” Lauren whispered and giggled when Cissy smiled.

“You devious little bitch! I love it!” She pulled Lauren in for a second hug. “I do kinda hate you now for catchin’ such a hot hunk of beef. Even if he is scary as fuck.”

“Priscilla. Mouth,” Lauren sighed.

She only laughed. “You take care of those babies. We both know Marabeth won’t.”

“I have to go to Asgard for a while, but not until I know Sara and Benny are out of danger.”

A knock preceded Clara, one of the maids, peeking in the door. “Miss Cissy? The car’s out front and I've left your bag at the door.”

“... Lu?” Cissy whispered as she clung to Lauren. “I’m kinda scared.”

“You can do this Cissy. I'm so damn proud of you for makin’ the decision yourself.” She squeezed her tight a final time. “You want me to walk you out?”

“No. No, I think I've left you the tough job.”

Lauren frowned.

“Someone's gotta tell mama,” she quipped as she walked away. “I left the place I'm headed to looked up on my laptop.”

“Now I hate you,” Lauren called as the door swung shut on Cissy’s parting laughter, and she collapsed back into her chair.

The first sob was nothing more than a harsh shudder before Loki's arms were wrapped around her, and she was once more bawling on his shoulder.

Next Chapter

[avengerofyourheart]

The Lucky One Pt 4

Characters: reader, Marjorie (reader’s mom), Bucky (James), OC Kevin Jenkins, OC Caleb, mention of a certain other Avenger.

Summary: As a single mom with a jerk of an ex-husband, you’re doing your best to run the family business all on your own when your mother hires a mysterious man with a troubled past to help out. He just might be what you need in your life, but will his secrets bring you together or tear you apart? (Events occur shortly after Captain America: The Winter Soldier)

Warnings: a little angst, SO MUCH FLUFF, ex being a jerk. Super light violence? Maybe? Tiny cliffhanger. 

Word Count: 3.7k (this one got away from me, but you’ll see why :D )

A/N: Eee!! So excited about this part! Originally for Stark Tower’s Movie Challenge, which has ended, but I’m continuing on my own just for fun. I chose the movie “The Lucky One” and I’m really excited about it! Please let me know your thoughts, whether you’ve see the movie or not, I appreciate your feedback!! :)

Tags are at the bottom (Permanent list is closed, but tags for THIS SERIES ONLY are open)

<<<Part Three   Part Four   Part Five>>> 

The Lucky One Series Masterlist

____________________________________________________

Previously:

“I don’t know much about my family. They’ve been gone for a while.”

Feeling a tug at your heart, you felt badly for bringing it up. “I’m sorry.”

He put on a brave smile, meeting your eyes. “It happens. Thanks again. I’ll see you in the morning.”

“Good night,” you replied, offering a smile in return. You watched his figure retreat into the dark and then closed the door behind you. It was only after he was gone that you realized tomorrow was Sunday and his day off. Would he actually show up and refuse a day free from work again? You couldn’t allow that. There were labor laws, after all. And yet…part of you hoped to see him sooner than Monday. Knowing him only a few weeks, the man was still a mystery, but each clue given had you aching for more.  

_______

The morning sun rose crisp and clear on Sunday, your ears tuned to any outdoor noises. Unexpected disappointment creeped into your mind to find silence. You had become accustomed to the early sounds of James sawing, hammering, or tossing bales of hay onto the ground outside the stables this early. You weren’t really surprised, given that it was Sunday, but the promised words of “See you in the morning” echoed in your mind from last night.

Shaking off this odd feeling, you climbed out of bed and pulled on a cozy sweater before descending the stairs toward the kitchen. Soon you had pancakes on the griddle and all the other breakfast fixin’s on the table. The delicious smells roused the rest of the house, soon hearing your mother’s shuffling feet along with the frantic scamper of your energetic boy approaching.

After breakfast, you all dressed for church and headed out the door. You weren’t particularly religious, but your mother attended every week and couldn’t get around on her own very well, so you and Caleb tagged along. An hour-long service was all your mother’s poor back could handle, what with the sitting on those hard pews and all the getting up and down constantly. Stepping outside the church, you lingered with Caleb as your mother thanked the pastor and chatted with the ladies she played Poker with. Any other aging mother would be playing Bridge, but not yours. She needed the thrill of taking the whole Jackpot, even if no actual money was exchanged.

You waved at a few friends as you pulled your sweater tighter around you. The dress you wore was one of your favorites, but it wasn’t particularly warm. Caleb had settled on the steps with the small sketchbook he brought almost everywhere. Glancing down, you noticed that he seemed to be sketching the storefronts across from the church. He then looked up and pointed, drawing your attention, “Mama, look! It’s James! Can I go say hi?”

Following his gaze, you saw that it was indeed the long-haired brunet. He was exiting the hardware store with a few bags in each hand. Shielding your eyes from the Autumn sun, you could see he wore his usual baseball cap, jacket, and gloves. You saw him looking around briefly, then he did a double take and paused upon spotting you. Caleb waved enthusiastically, standing from his crouched position while you hesitantly raised a hand in greeting. “You’ll see him tomorrow, honey. Let’s not bother him on his day off, mmkay?”

The blond-haired boy exhaled in disappointment, “Okay.”

James had transferred all his bags to his left hand and raised his right in response with a smile. He then looked away and continued on down the street. Turning back toward the open church doors, you saw your mother was finally approaching, ready to leave.

________

The repetitive sounds of hammering woke you on Monday, oddly bringing a smile to your face. Another morning began with a quick breakfast, forgotten homework, and a mad rush to meet the school bus before you returned home and visited the stables. A ladder rested against the outside wall while sounds were heard up on the roof. Glancing inside, you could see that all the horses had water and food already so you passed by each stall, saying hello to every horse and nuzzling their soft noses. Jasper snorted and stamped his hooves at your approach, a frown tugging at your mouth with worry.

The sounds above were muffled from inside and you suspected James was hitting softly so as to not spook the horses. So considerate. Walking back outside, you rounded the corner toward the ladder and climbed up. You stood on a rung only about 8 feet off the ground with the roof visible. At the top you saw James on his hands and knees replacing shingles.

Waiting for him to pause in hammering, you finally spoke, “Good morning, James.”

He turned your way with a smile, “Good morning, Y/N.”

“Today’s project, I see?” you asked, gesturing toward the work he had already accomplished.

He shrugged, “I saw a few places where it was rotting through. Seemed like a Monday project.”

You grinned in approval. “It was nice to see you in town yesterday. Did you have a restful Sunday?”

Sitting back on his heels, he adjusted the bill of his cap. “As restful as I get. Worked on the house mostly.”

“Hence the hardware store, I suppose.”

He just nodded, giving you a warm, but conservative smile. He was a bit more liberal with those lately and you were definitely a fan, bringing out a grin of your own.

“Well,” you glanced around, “I’ll leave you to it, then. I’ll be back out with the training schedules in a while.”

“Sounds good,” he responded, lifting his hammer again to strike.

Climbing down, you headed for the house and stepped onto the porch, then looking back for a different view of James. Even from a distance, you could see that he filled out those jeans rather nicely in the back. You flushed and chastised yourself with a shake of your head before stepping inside.

________

Monday and Tuesday passed by as scheduled, both days busy and productive. Wednesday disrupted the flow, but in a mostly positive way. Caleb attended school in the morning, but a field trip in the afternoon involved visiting a local wheat farm, which of course your son was allergic to, so you picked him up and brought him home around noon. You were preparing some lunch while your mother rested, seeing Caleb on the grass out front from the kitchen window. He was trying desperately to practice his karate moves before lessons that night but was having trouble on his own and you were no help. You cursed Kevin once again for never being the father Caleb deserved.

Unexpected warm weather brought an Indian Summer, prompting you to open all the windows for fresh air. Across the lawn, you spotted James walking out of the barn and taking a seat on the tailgate of your pickup truck. He had just unloaded about 20 bags of oats and horse feed in no time, now taking a break for lunch. He didn’t need reminding now to stop midday for a meal, which you were glad about. He deserved a break.

Pulling items from the fridge, you busied yourself preparing the meal. Returning to the sink to wash your hands, you glanced out the window and was surprised to see that James was approaching the house. He paused, talking to Caleb who had collapsed on the grass in defeat. Reaching for a towel, you observed James walk closer to the boy, who stood at the man’s approach. James reached Caleb, then facing him and widening his stance with his fists raised close to his face. You watched, heart in your throat, as the muscled man gently instructed your son on his foot placement and what looked like a way to block a punch.

You couldn’t believe your eyes. This hard-working, kind, handsome, near-stranger volunteered to spend time with your son on his down time, when his own father couldn’t even bother. Lunch was ready, but you didn’t want to break the spell so you tackled a few dirty pots and pans left over from last night’s dinner that you’d left soaking. Once the sink was filled with soapy water, you dipped your hands in and started to scrub.

Another glance out the window, you saw that James had removed his jacket, sweater, and baseball cap leaving him in a long-sleeved Henley and his ever-present gloves. He knelt down to meet Caleb’s eye level and raised his fists, gesturing for the boy to do the same. In slow motion, the man demonstrated the correct movement for a solid punch, putting his weight into it, and then inversely taught him how to block it.

You felt a flutter in your chest, seeing for the first time an unrestrained smile on James’ handsome face, his white teeth gleaming in the sun. Utterly captivated, you grinned with your hands still moving under the soapy water.

Caleb successfully blocked one of James’ very soft punches, jumping around in triumph as he aimed to high-five the man, then completely missing his hand. James barked out a loud laugh, throwing his head back, while Caleb’s higher giggles drifted through the open window to you. Quite possibly the most beautiful sounds you’d ever heard, your heart swelling at their joyous interaction. A wide smile reached your lips as your own happiness bubbled up in that moment.

“Well, that pot’s as clean as it’ll ever be,” you heard a voice speak behind you.

Startled, you dropped the pot in the water and stepped back as water sloshed onto the floor. You whirled around to see your mother leaning against the kitchen’s entrance with a knowing smile on her face. Pulling the sink plug, you drained the water and rinsed the pot as you spoke.

“I was, uh…um…lunch is ready. Have a seat, I’ll go call Caleb in,” you stated, attempting to keep your voice casual.

“Uh huh,” you mother responded with a smirk.

Drying your hands, you walked through the entryway and stepped out onto the porch, seeing the two still gently sparring.

“There you go! See? You’re getting it!” James complimented the boy with enthusiasm.

He had his hands up to block when he finally noticed you on the porch, relaxing his stance with a smile. In that moment, Caleb’s punch swung wild, making contact with the edge of James’ jaw. The man threw his head back in surprise, not pain, but he exaggerated the momentum and let himself fall to his back on the grass.

Your hand flew to your mouth, rushing forward. Fairly certain he wasn’t hurt, you still wanted to be sure.

“James! I’m so sorry! I didn’t mean to hit you, please don’t be mad,” Caleb scampered to his side in worry.

The man let out a laugh, rubbing a hand across his stubbled jaw as he rose to his feet. “You pack a mean punch, buddy, but I promise I’m okay. And I’m not mad. That was an honest hit, I let down my guard so It’s my fault. I’m more worried about your fist, though. I can be pretty hard-headed.”

Caleb looked down at his hand, “I think it’s okay.”

Finally reaching the pair, you gathered the boy’s hand in yours, seeing there was barely a mark on his knuckles. A little redness, but that could very well be a beard burn from James’ stubble. You kissed it and pulled him into a quick hug.

“Alright, I think that’s enough excitement for today,” you declared. Caleb whined, but you insisted. “I know, I know, but it’s lunch time anyway so go wash up. And brush the grass out of your hair before you get inside,” you hollered the last sentence as your son rushed toward the house. “Hey! What do you say to James?”

The boy whirled back around and ran toward the man, gripping him in a hug around the waist. “Thank you for teaching me, James!”

“You’re welcome, pal,” James responded with a grin, less startled by the hug this time.

Watching your son enter the house, you turned back toward James. “Thank you for that. Really. It means the world to him that you would take the time,” you told him sincerely.

“It was my pleasure, honestly,” the brunet replied. “He’s a great kid. He, uh…he actually reminds me a lot of a friend of mine growing up. Always one of the smaller kids with struggling health, he still managed to be the toughest guy I know. Constantly getting into fights, but only for noble reasons, so I taught him a thing or two about self defense. I don’t know anything about karate, but maybe some of this will help Caleb out.” He smiled, eyes unfocused as his mind traveled back through memories.

Still in awe of his generosity and the fact that he just spoke more at once than he had the entire time you’d known him, you quietly observed him for a moment before speaking. “What was his name?”

“Steve,�� James said at a whisper almost, avoiding your gaze.

You sensed it was a sensitive subject, so you let the moment pass in silence. Out of curiosity, you then took a step toward him, lightly gripping his prickly chin and turning his face to the side.

“Are you sure you’re not hurt?” you asked, looking for a mark from his unexpected strike from a small fist.

You brushed your thumb over the area and saw nothing, caught unaware when he leaned into your touch, his eyes fluttering closed. Instinctively, your palm cupped his cheek with a gentle caress. The moment was gone as quickly as it came, though, as he shot his eyes open, quickly taking a step back. Burying hands in his jeans pockets, he avoided your gaze. You crossed your arms over your chest, still feeling the remnants of a spark that flowed between you.

He cleared his throat, “I, uh…I actually came up here to ask you something.”

“Okay. Ask away,” you encouraged him.

He steeled his nerves with a deep breath. “I’ve been spending a fair amount of time with the horses…even reading up on certain subjects on my down time. Training, behavioral patterns, psychology, all of that.”

“Wow. That’s amazing,” you replied, then letting him continue.

“So, I was thinking…I’ve built up quite a bit of trust with Jasper and I was hoping I could maybe take him on a walk with a lead rope? Get him away from the stables? Just for a short time and within the fence. He’s been cooped up so long, I bet he’d love to stretch his legs a little.” You started to protest, but he stopped you. “I know, I know. It’s a risk. But I promise it’ll be fine. And should anything happen to myself as a result, I take full responsibility. I think I can handle him, though.”

You were silent a moment, considering his proposal before responding. “You’re sure about this? You’re confident that he trusts you and you won’t endanger yourself?”

“Yes. I’m positive,” he assured you, hope shining in his greyish-blue eyes.

Another beat of silence, then you nodded. “Okay. I trust you.”

A bright smile split across his handsome face, causing that flutter in your chest to reappear.

“But,” you interjected, “I’d like to supervise, from a distance. And it has to be after regular training hours, so later this evening when all the other horses are in for the night. Deal?”

“Yes! Absolutely. Thank you, Y/N” he smiled.

“Okay then.”

“Okay,” he echoed, a look of glee upon his face. “Well, I guess my lunch time is over. Better get back to it.”

You gave a nod, shooting him a smile. “I’ll be back to training after lunch.”

“Sounds good,” James replied, gathering his jackets and hat before heading for the stables.

You watched him go for a moment and then climbed the steps into the house.

_________

That evening, you stood outside the fence of the paddock, eyes wide in wonderment. You couldn’t believe that James had been able to slip the reins over Jasper’s head and was now leading the horse around the perimeter of the fence. They’d been at it for almost an hour and by now James had gotten the thoroughbred animal up to a gallop, the man running alongside. No saddle attempted yet, with riding too much of a risk at this point.

As the day’s last light faded, you gave the man a wave, indicating to bring the horse back in for the night. He followed your instructions and walked Jasper back into the stables through the side entrance. You walked around the long way toward the main doors.

A few hours earlier, you had sent Caleb off with his father to yet another karate lesson. Your stomach clenched each time you thought about it, especially with his returning with a split lip a few weeks previous. Kevin still insisted Caleb needed this, but you let your son know that he didn’t have to go if he didn’t want to. The boy assured you it was fun, but you knew at least part of him was doing it solely to please his father.

Huffing a frustrated sigh as those thoughts whirled in your head, you entered the barn to see that James already had removed the reins and was brushing Jasper’s chestnut coat until it gleamed. Still keeping your distance, you watched the man as the animal seemed to be completely at ease. James had removed his hat and hooked it on one of the posts, leaving the stall door open. You could hear him talk to the horse at a low tone as he brushed.

With a quiet voice, you gained his attention, “Wow. That was…incredible. You have the touch, James.”

He turned toward you with a grin, “It felt good. Thank you for trusting me.”

“You’ve earned it. I still don’t know how you did it. And what were you saying to him a moment ago?” you asked in curiosity.

“Come here,” James beckoned to you with a gloved hand.

You stepped forward cautiously, entering the stall. James offered his hand and you took it as he led you to Jasper’s side.

“I like to talk to him about random things sometimes, but mostly I tell him what I’m doing. You know, ‘I’m going to put the reins on now, it won’t hurt’ or ‘I’ll be brushing your neck first and then down to your legs’. Stuff like that. Could be just my tone of voice but I like to think that he understands me. Here,” he gestured, placing your hand on Jasper’s neck while placing his hand on top of yours. “I think he’s just scared sometimes. Even more-so in a new place, he needs reassurance.”

James offered you the brush and you took over, running your hand across the smooth yet coarse hair of the animal’s neck.

“Also, I noticed something when I was brushing him yesterday. Right here by his leg…” he took your hand again, placing it just in front of the horses’ right rear leg. You could feel a slight lump there, taking care not to press too hard.

“Ouch,” you spoke softly in sympathy. “If he’s in pain, then that explains a lot of his behavior. I’ll have the vet come out tomorrow and check it out. Hopefully Jasper will cooperate with you there, too.” You stepped out of the stall and James followed, closing the stall door. “Thank you. For caring and for paying attention to his pain…for doing what I couldn’t.” You spoke sincerely, placing a hand on James’ arm and letting it rest there.

He gave a bashful smile,”No, thank you. For trusting me with these animals and showing me how to care for them. It’s an incredible new experience.”

You let your hand brush down his arm to let go, but James clasped your fingers lightly instead. Meeting his eyes, you tightened your grip and stepped toward him. His gaze flickered to your lips, sending a jolt of electricity up your spine as he closed the distance between you. Placing his right hand to side of your neck, he licked his lips and leaned forward. You met him halfway, pressing your mouth to his lightly at first but the spark quickly caught fire, heat consuming you both. Releasing his hand, you looped your arms around his neck, bodies fused together in passion. His tongue swiped your bottom lip, testing the waters, the floodgates then opening as you allowed him entrance. His strong arms against your back held you tightly to him, your hands grasping at the roots of his long brunet strands.

Lost in each other, you nearly missed the sound of tires on gravel as a car approached. Breaking apart reluctantly, your chest heaved against his, foreheads touching. You took a step back, slowly releasing his hand as you backed away toward the door without breaking eye contact.

“Um…I have to, uh…” you gestured behind you as a car came to a stop. He nodded, running a hand through his hair.

You whirled around and left the stables to see Kevin and Caleb exiting the patrol car. Your son’s shoulders were slumped with his head down as he walked toward the house.

“Hey, kiddo. How was practice?” you asked, hoping to sound optimistic.

“Fine,” he answered flatly without even turning.

Frowning, you let him go before turning to your ex-husband. “What happened, Kevin?”

“What makes you think something happened?” the burly man asked defensively. “Okay, so maybe one of the kids noticed Caleb blocking a few of his hits for once and got upset…might’ve given him a shove. He fell a few times.”

“What? Kevin! This is what I’m talking about! I’m not against Caleb learning to defend himself, but kids can get mean and I don’t want him being singled out because he’s small. I really think he should stop…”

“Well, that’s really not up to you. Don’t forget, I could call a judge and get custody in a week. You’re lucky I don’t cause I’m nice,” he sneered.

Fuming, you held your tongue once again. Losing Caleb was your greatest fear and you just couldn’t let that happen.

“Fine,” you curtly replied. “Can you just make sure he’s paired up with someone closer to his size next week? Please?”

Smiling at your complacency, he shrugged, “I guess. I’ll talk to the teacher, or whatever he’s called.”

“Thank you,” you felt ill, thanking this man, but it’s what he wanted to hear. “We’ll see you on Saturday, then, right?”

Perplexed, he furrowed his brow, “For what?”

“Kevin!” you exclaimed, almost losing your cool again. “It’s his birthday! Please, just be there, okay? He wants you there.”

“Yeah, yeah. I’ll be there,” he muttered, climbing into his car. As his tail lights disappeared, you tried to release the tension your body held.

You felt a hand against the small of your back and turned to see James beside you. Even the sight of him made you feel better.

“What does he have on you?” he asked quietly.

“What?” you questioned in shock.

“It’s the only explanation. You’re a strong, independent, successful business owner and an incredible mom to Caleb. The only reason that asshat would think he’d have a leg to stand on in court was if he was holding something over your head.” He said it so matter-of-factly.

You were stunned, but sighed in surrender. “He is.”

___________

Part 5>>>

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Hmmm. I wonder what it could be? :D And how bout that heated moment?? Finally!!!! A lot of slow burn, hope it was worth the wait! I appreciate all of you for the support and comments!! Thank you!! I love to hear from you, whether it be message, reblog, ask, reply, whatever. You’re all amazing. I’ll work on part 5 as soon as life allows. :) 

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