#bro why are landscapes so hard

[dovesick]

california coastline

[alienpossession]

"Ohhh fuck bro, yeah, get inside of me," said the newly promoted investment banking analyst as he let his small intergalactic friend slipped right back in through his anus after blowing his cock. Cristobal entered UPenn through scholarship as a talented soccer player, so no one expected him to not only ace his college soccer career, but also graduating in the upper rung of his Finance degree. Not like it's very hard or anything, but Cristobal, or Chris in its anglicized version, is never known to be a rather bright student. Even his GPA in the first two semester were not stellar or anything. Of course he didn't disclose the fact that a small-yet-brilliant, intergalactic being with light-years ahead computational abilities and civilization beyond human comprehension slid into him during one of his away game. That little bundle of brilliance turned around Cristobal's fate as it cohabited with the handsome Latino stud, and life went so much smoother for the suddenly very studious Cristobal.

And with every milestones they achieved together, as a way to show his gratitude, Cristobal would feed his little partner with his blissfully tangy and creamy spunk that looked like the elixir of the deities in the creature's folktale. A double promotion is certainly worthy of copious amount of cum, that's why Cristobal already planned an explosive night where he will have a threesome with one of the Assistant Vice President (in IB, AVP is like, middle management, nothing really high or anything but still a rather powerful position) and his wife. Well, it's a dinner for starter, but the little fella already aimed at the hunky DILF ever since Cristobal seen him changing clothes in his office after his morning workout on the ground floor's gym and also the encounter during bathroom break where the AVP gingerly smiled at Cristobal as they make eye contact while he stuffed his definitely fat cock into his suit pants after pissing in the urinoir

He's going to make the move tonight and put that hunk and his wife under its alien mate control, sharing the blissful devotion to serve the brilliant intergalactic being

If the AVP already under its control, maybe the little creature can spread across the AVP rank and then proceed to climb higher within his influential investment banking leadership to see how much control it can exercise not only over the company, but to the global financial landscape as it sees fit. After all, it's been a rather lonely few years for the little creature, maybe its time to call some of its friends to Earth and reap some more bliss in life from the oblivious human.

[nekropsii]

Atomic Ask Bomb 4!!

This is a bunch of lighthearted haterism! Well... "Lighthearted" as in it's just a bunch of quippy bitching, not "lighthearted" in its subject matter. Same shit as always!

Content Warning: Long, Discussions of Abuse, Transmisogyny, Ableism, Pedophilia, Mentions of Incest, Bestiality.

True. At least I don't have to start doing unironic Freudian analysis just to feel like I've said something new and interesting about my specialty cast.

It's weird, because there really is a lot that isn't said about the Main Cast - a lot of which is really interesting - but... People would rather die than put serious, grounded thoughts into these characters, it feels. Especially if the topic is even vaguely uncomfortable. So, you get some nonsense on how there should have been menstruation in Homestuck, or that Eridan was never intended to die, instead of putting any serious analytical thought on Dave's abuse, or Jake's relationship with gender.

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In some places, they're even worse. Not because anything has changed, but because some issues have been made more visible by the change of landscape on Tumblr.

Like, people have way more points of entry to be Transmisogynistic, for example. The Homestuck fandom has always been Transmisogynistic, of course - March Eridan... Certainly exists - but now we've got more people talking about Roxy, about Dave, about Jake, about Calliope, about June... And while the level of Transmisogyny hasn't really changed, per se, it's hard to deny that it isn't more commonplace, in a way, purely because the amount of discussions surrounding Transfemininity has increased.

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CroTuna fans need to pick a fucking struggle that isn't that lame ass hill they've chosen to die on. Can you do something else, instead? Can you think liking Bluey is praxis or something? Literally anything is better, because literally anything else is funnier.

I'm not really super into AraSol or anything, but how can you be down to clown with CroTuna and not fuck with AraSol. Do you just want to crank your meat to abuse? What? Lmao.

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No one's normal about Personality Disorders. Cluster B Disorders especially get the shit end of the stick. It's unsurprising that the Homestuck fandom isn't normal about Personality Disorders when literally no one else is, for some reason.

It's just crazy watching people try to have you take them seriously and not look at them like they're fucking insane when they talk about their analysis that Cronus has NPD because he's terrible and abuses people. Like, what are you saying? Do you hear the words coming out of your mouth?

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Dave generally keeps all of his most intimate relationships pretty private, it's why it's kinda hard to keep up with his love life in canon. He grew up under the lens of countless cameras for the pleasure of prying adult eyes. Voyeurism is a huge part of his story, as it is a strong aspect of the abuse he faced growing up. Particularly, said Voyeurism was a key part of the sexual abuse he was subject to.

The fandom's handling of DaveKat feels like Voyeurism because so much of the fandom is dedicated to showing them in intimate scenarios that just feel... Wrong to see. Like, you just know for a fact if this was happening in the comic, we wouldn't be seeing it. Some even have whole blogs dedicated to those kinds of private moments they'd have behind closed doors. The fandom eats it up and calls for seconds, thirds, fourths, fifths - with a nigh fetishistic fervor. Sometimes, it's really hard to not feel like they're in Bro's sleazy live chats, asking to see more of the cute young one.

Even PostCanon frames the rabid consumption of DaveKat content as Voyeuristic. It's not a difficult or out of pocket read, I don't think.

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I think the secrecy of it all is fitting, personally. The hints we did get of the dynamic certainly don't sound very pleasant, though, much to the fandom's chagrin. On screen Kurloz & Mituna interaction would likely just be more Mituna Abuse Simulator.

And, no, I don't think she would be able to do that.

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The issue is that Cannibalism is largely something used not as an expression of Control Issues, but as an expression of Consumption.

Consumption is a really interesting theme to me in fiction. It can mean a lot of things and be shown in a lot of different ways - possessive love, caves, abuse, codependency, capitalism, so on and so forth - but... It's just... Honestly completely nonexistent in Dirk and Jake's relationship. That's why it feels forced to me. I just genuinely don't know where people are picking up the theme of Consumption, especially hard enough to start talking about Cannibalism as a natural extension of it.

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That's the Heterosexual Incest Exception, babey. It's the Spiders Georg. It doesn't count. People are always gonna have the Heterosexual Incest Exception, because they physically cannot help themselves but jerk it to little girls getting molested by their dad or something. It's awful, but it is unfortunately true.

That said, if anyone pulls that kind of shit with Sovereignstuck, I am personally banning you.

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See, Vriska fans aren't in denial - they know she blows, that's the appeal. They're just tired of people acting like it's the end of the fucking world, or like she's the worst person in the comic when Cronus exists. Who is, ironically, exactly who you're talking about, lmao.

You know that meme that goes "You guys would fuck a fence if it was white"? That, but it reads "You guys would forgive anything if a white man did it". If you're a skinny white man in a piece of fiction, you apparently just have a free pass to do and say literally fucking anything. It's actually genuinely insane. People will gaslight themselves so hard into thinking that skinny white man is hot and did nothing wrong, even when the whole function of his existence is that he totally and completely sucks and is entirely irredeemable and has never been sorry for anything he's ever done in his life and never will be, and is 100% aware of the fact that what he's doing is abusive and simply doesn't care. It's nuts. It's so nuts. What are you guys TALKING about.

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[Writing in notebook] Modern AU Cronus... Is Jeffree Star... Got it!

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Look, man. I've seen some shit. You have to understand how much I could fully see that happening. I flinched because it's realistic. Do you know how much Bec/Jade content there is? Help me.

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"Indirectly".

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Kankri even takes part in being Ableist to Mituna. It's crazy. They're fucking tag teaming to make Mituna's life as miserable as possible.

Really funny that people still take him as the good and correct guy when he's an Ableist Stalker that doesn't think Misogyny is real. This is the guy whose hill you're willing to die on? Get real!

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He's a great source for conflict. Excellent torture device to have primed in the toolbox of narrative crafting.

Completely intolerable as a person. He should actually genuinely go to jail. That's not a joke. He's literally a repeat sex criminal.

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It is so fucking funny watching people act like they would've been any better than her. Like, no, I can assure you that if you were walked on and ignored to the degree that she was, for the amount of time that she was, you'd start smashing planets together, too. No one here is better than Aranea. Aranea handled that shit better than a saint would.

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Can you believe people act like the past was better? Lmfao.

We've made at least some decent strides in making sure the fandom is at least a little safer. Don't know why people are looking at a sordid past littered with terrible behavior and and an intense amount of porn of children and unironically parroting that cute little fascist "Reject Modernity, Embrace Tradition!" meme. What the fuck are you on about?

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We can't fucking win. Either we have to sit in a little pool of the same 15 guys and never really get anything fresh on the table, or we can bait new people in and suddenly have to deal with a million people calling WV "The Mayor" and condescendingly calling everyone whiny bitches when you correct them or literally defending segregation in your notes or something.

That last one isn't a joke. I've literally had people defending segregation in my notes because I pointed out that it's weird as fuck that the Racial Kingdoms exist in PostCanon. They started going on about how it's okay because they all "have different needs" (so do humans?) and "Carapacians can't talk anyway" (yes they can??) and "Consorts are biologically stupider" (WHAT). Like. Holy shit. You should get hit by a car.

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Your honor, he never even did all that shit!! Get your facts straight!! Stop getting all your info from 23rd-hand sources!! Think for yourself!! AAAAAA!!!!

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[davekat-sucks]

Oooh! I have my own headcanons as well!

John Egbert, movie critic and professional prankster, has a small Youtube Channel named EctoBiologist_143 that does a lot of skit based comedy reviews, think Nostalgia Critic without the scummy business practices. John also tries to code personal birthday card files for his friends, they work half the time, if unzipping the .ath file is recognized on the computer’s software.

Rose Lalonde loves to overanalyze kids media, especially squiddles as it’s a way for her to bond with Jade, and Rose notices quite a lot of references to the deep sea and hidden realms in the media.

Dave Strider, as much as he loves to remix and produce beats, he also learns the drums as a traditional instrument to play band, he made one EP with John Rose and Jade, he says he doesn’t want to publish because it “sounds too normal to be indie” bit really he wants a piece of his second family to keep as a memory. His first family was him and bro, and yeeeeeeah, he doesn’t like puppets, except Randy Feltface.

Jade Harley prefers to be a vegetarian, but her Bec side loves meat, she treats herself to black bean burgers and tofu sausages. Her mostly veggie diet comes from her gardening, making all-organic foods. Her Bec side also makes her droop when she’s near nuclear reactors, that’s why her job is reactor designer and not inspection.

Jane Crocker made an MSPFA called Professional Charlatan, an adventure about a hard-boiled prankster, an Adventuring Dandy and a Populist Ingenious work as a team with intelligensia from Master Kernel to defeat the insidious and undersea work of the MERMAID MOB. It is very obvious this is loosely based on Jane and her friends fighting the Condesce.

Jake English dabbles in the art, and takes from Pablo Picasso’s blue period. Rose has a very psychoanalytical idea for why he likes to draw so many blue landscapes, and round, wavy feminine shapes. Jake also draws Robots, a lot. He even gets commissions to draw corny 1950s sci-fi book covers!

Roxy teaches John how to make code in .ath that does not suck. She and John love to share simple code that range from ripoff arcade games to ascii gifs. She takes a lot of the wine her mom stored to be sold in a wine store she owns. Roxy likes to taste wine, but declines anything more than one glass to drink, modesty is policy!

Dirk Strider works with a lot of felt and soft fabrics. He actually makes quilts as therapy for living on his own for 16 years. He also likes to hang out with Dave, he looks up to Dave and how he turned out even with the worst Dirk in all of Paradox space. Dirk still has a manipulative streak where he tries to subtly convince Dave to binge The Muppet Show with him to grow a tolerance for non-smutty plushes. Dave still can not watch any scene with Gonzo without getting sweaty and tense.

This is a lot of text for 8 characters so if I ever do troll headcanons they are in a separate batch.

[huffle-dork]

Long Live the King

Chapter 2: Birds of a Feather

Read Fantasy Masks | Read Swapboys | Read the first FM adventure | Other Multiverse Adventures | Read on AO3

The fall is rough. Is traveling through universes usually like this? It can't be, can it? But it doesn't last forever. 

Dr. Jameson Jackson lands on a wooden surface. Not a floor, because it's... swaying slightly. Jameson blinks rapidly and tries to get his bearings. He feels the rocking and feels his stomach churn a little. Ugh… he hasn’t felt that since he was a lad… where are they? 

He looks around and sees Henrik only a few feet away from him. The way Alt explained it- he half expected to be alone. So, the good doctor is startled a bit as he sees Henrik prone just a bit away from him.

They've both landed on... a boat. Of course, that's why it's swaying. This is about the size of a modern sailboat, maybe a bit bigger, but with the wood and canvas makeup of an old sailing ship. Looking over the side, the boat is docked on the bank of a river. There's a handful of tents set up on the grass.

Dr. J pushes himself up and staggers over to help shake the other man awake. Henny blinks blearily and then looks up at Dr. J. He smiles with a bit of daze, “Ah hallo Juwel…! You… why are you… tilting?” 

Dr. J chuckles, “It seems we landed on a boat, my friend. Are you alright?” 

Henrik pushes himself up and then pats himself down. Then he grins and nods eagerly. “Yes! I am fine!” Then his eyes widen as he takes in the sights of the river and landscapes and fresh air. He excitedly runs towards the railing and leans against it, laughing breathlessly, “Juwel!! Mein god!! Look at all of this!! It’s- it’s-! atemberaubend-!” 

Dr. J startles and follows Henny with concern, “Henrik! Please be careful!!” He wishes he could be as carefree as the teal haired gentleman… but Dr. J can’t get the image of Alt and Bro out of his head… What if they were seriously hurt? Would they be able to find them? 

Suddenly, a hatch on the deck opens, revealing a staircase leading down into the hold of the boat. Two people walk up into the deck, busy talking with each other. One is brown-haired, wearing a scarf and white tunic, and the other is blonde, wearing a blue coat with an eye-patch covering his right eye. At first, they sound like they’re speaking random nothing, but then the translator spell kicks in mid-sentence. “—just saying it does not make sense,” the blonde one is saying. “They’re not all above when She is below. Not really fair.” 

“No, I understand, but I think it’s the thought that counts,” the brown-haired one replies. 

The two of them are walking in the opposite direction of Dr. J and Henrik. But even with their backs to them, the two newcomers can see the white masks hanging around the pair’s necks.

Dr. J startles at hearing the hatch open and watches as they step out and walk away. He watches with fascination as their language starts to morph into something he can understand. And… those white masks- they look just like Alt’s! These must be the Masked Phantoms. 

Henny is rocking excitedly against the railing of the boat, looking like an excited kid. He blinks back at Dr. J and then brightens up with a grin. “Oh oh! New friends already!! They have the maskes!!” He waves wildly, calling out, “Hallo!!” He is… very loud- kinda hard to miss. 

"Kovatch--!" the blonde one shouts in surprise. He spins around first, pulling on his mask--one of the more elaborate ones, looking a bit like a dragon. Strangely, it only has one eye hole. The brunette turns around only slightly slower, also reaching for his mask. But he stops. He stares at Dr. J and Henrik, blinking in confusing. And for good reason. If this man's hair was teal instead of natural brown, he wouldn't look too different from Henny. The man laughs. "I think I understand what this is," he says. "Relax, Vsevna. They may be friends." He waves back at them. "Hello! Can you understand us?"

Henrik gasps in delight at seeing the two men. He grabs Dr. J’s arm and shakes him. “Juwel!! Juwel!! It is me!! Another me!! Hallo, other Henrik!! And your friend- is not one of us! But I very much like his mask!!” 

Dr. J laughs and waves as he gets shook. He’s used to this. “Hello- yes we can understand you. Our friends Alt and Chase told us so much about you! They wanted us to come to visit.” He looks to Henrik and makes a motion to breathe towards him in sign before stepping back up and resting a hand on his chest. His voice is much more quiet and subdued compared to Henny’s. “I’m Dr. Jameson Jackson, but my friends just call me Dr. J. Or, Juwel, if you’re Henrik.” He grins then gestures, “and Henrik already gave his name… in a way.” He laughs. “And… forgive his… energy. He’s very excitable.” 

The brown-haired man grins. "I am also Henrik! It's so nice to meet you, other me. No need to apologize, ah, Jameson. My friend Jackie is quite excitable as well, I am very used to it." 

Vsevna relaxes slightly, pulling his mask off. He smiles at the two of them. "Well. The visitors from another world that I have heard about. It's been a shame that I was not there to see those two. How nice to meet you, too. And thank you." His smile widens into a grin. "I worked very hard for this mask design." 

"Yes, and then you hardly use it," Henrik mutters, making Vsevna laugh. 

Dr. J looks to Vsevna and smiles, “And you’re Vsevna then? A pleasure to meet you both.” 

“Ah Juwel- how is that name spelled?? I don’t think my ear thingys are getting it right.” Henny asks, tapping his ear. The phantom masks can see something that rests inside his ear.

Henrik leans to the side a bit, trying to get a better look at what's inside Henny's ears. "Oh, maybe you are not getting it right because your ears are plugged up. Unless--that is normal in your world?" 

Henny laughs and shakes his head, “Even if my ears are plugged up it would not make difference! I am deaf- less so now though! These devices help me to hear but- it is very complex and I am not sure I understand it well still.” 

"Oh! Really?" Henrik's eyes light up. "That is amazing! I have heard of spells to help with deafness but they must be redone again and again. It would be so much easier to just be able to put something in your ears and have it help." 

Dr. J brightens up, “It is a fascinating procedure! It’s all to do with the inner ear bones- and though it can’t restore it back fully it can help him re-experience sound in a new way!”

"I would offer to spell my name for you, but I do not think it would work properly," Vsevna says. "They said that the alphabets are not the same--and there aren't even the right letters in Glassish, so I doubt it will be conveyed in another world's language."

Dr. J smiles and nods and goes to Henrik, “I believe it’s V-S-E-V-N-A, Henrik.” He spells the letters out in sign. 

Henny follows along and nods, trying out the name. “Vee… es- na… Vsevna!” Dr. J nods with a smile and Henny looks to Vsevna excitedly. “Vsevna! So good to meet you!!” 

Vsevna smiles. "So good to meet you, too! Henrik--I mean, my Henrik, sova--" Henrik blushes a little "--should we go find your other friends who were there for the last visit?" 

"Y-yes, we should." Henrik nods. "They are on shore." 

"Of course they are, everyone is!" Vsevna laughs. "I will take care of the gangplank." 

Henny and Dr. J share a glance with each other at Vsenva’s and Henrik’s exchange. Henny smirks.

As he walks off to do that, Henrik looks at Dr. J and Henny. "Did anyone else come with you? Alt, or your Chase? We need to find them if so, they've probably appeared in a different location just like last time." 

Dr. J’s face falls a bit at the question. “Ah yes… they came. They brought us here… but… I fear they may be in trouble.” 

Henny’s eyes flash with a slight growl, “Magnificent… that schmutzige Katze! He did something to them… we just do not know what…” 

Henrik's expression darkens. "Yes, Magnificent came here last time. We saw him, and, though not for very long, it was clear he's a threat. If he... 'did something to them'... well, I doubt it is good." 

Dr. J looks a bit shaken, thinking about confronting Mag and Henny is quick to hold him close by his shoulder. “All I know is… it looked like dark magics. But- most of the magics he does is like that so…” Henny sighs. 

“However, Alt did think ahead this time.” Dr. J adds, rolling up his sleeve to show his bracelet. “This can help lead us to them.”

Henrik leans closer, looking at the bracelet. "Ah, this is a tracking talisman of some kind, then. Clever. Hopefully your friends are nearby. They weren't too far apart from each other last time they arrived." 

"Aye!" Vsevna shouts from the edge of the boat. Part of the wall has swung outward, a plank pushed into place leading down to the nearby river bank. "We can't do much on a boat!" 

Henrik laughs. "Yes, that's a good point. Here." He gestures for Dr. J and Henny to follow him as he walks towards the gangplank.

Henny and Dr. J follow close behind- though neither seem to have very good sea legs. Even if the boat isn’t moving.

"Ah, here." Henrik offers a hand to support them on the boat. "I know it can be difficult." 

"You get used to it," Vsevna says cheerfully. "Careful on the plank. We don't have one with railings on a boat this small. Unfortunate." 

"Unfortunate," Henrik agrees. 

"Unfortunate." 

"Unfortunate." 

The two of them seem stuck in a repetition loop for a bit until Henrik shakes his head. "Sorry, that was strange." Vsevna bursts into laughter. 

Henny bursts into giggles. “Chase and Jackie do that a lot!” 

“It’s a phenomenon called echolalia!” Dr. J explains, “Sometimes we just like to repeat sounds from around us- especially if it’s someone we love. Or are fond of.” 

"'Eh-ko-lahl-ee-uh,'" Henrik repeats, carefully sounding out the syllables. "Good to know. We don't have a word for that here." 

Vsevna laughs for a bit more then becomes serious again. "But to be true for a second. There are many of us here. All of us are trained to fight, and some of us have magic as well. We can keep your friends and you safe." 

Henrik nods in agreement. "Magic is not faster than shooting an arrow."

Henny grins and nods, “We are quite well versed in taking on Magnificent. Bro and Alt are very strong! I’m sure we’ll find each other and everything will be okay!” 

Dr. J doesn’t look like he shares his friend’s optimism. But he does try to smile, even if it doesn’t reach his eyes. “Right… at least we are around allies…”

Henrik smiles at the two of them. "Yes, I can promise no harm will come to you here. There is that, at least." 

The group walks down the gangplank. There's a bit of a chill in the air, but it's not nearly as cold as it was the last time Chase and Alt were here. Not that Dr. J or Henny would know about that. There's a handful of people walking around the camp, most of them working on packing stuff into bags. All of them have masks. They glance at the group as they pass, confused on the newcomers' strange clothes--eyes tend to linger on Henny's hair--but they seem to shrug it off when they see Vsevna with them. 

Henny smooths down his hair self consciously. He laughs nervously, “ah… maybe I should have brought a hat…?” 

Dr. J shakes his head with a laugh, “I don’t think it would have done much good, friend. Our clothes already set us apart- especially your bright attire.” 

“I like all the colors of the modern world!” Henny almost whines. Dr. J pats his back. 

"You know your friends best, Henrik, where would they be?" Vsevna asks. "Or perhaps we should look for the other otherworld travelers first?"

Dr. J looks back at Vsevna and then hums quietly, “Well… maybe we should see who is closer by.” He rolls back up his sleeve and whispers the seeking word, holding it out to see if it can sense any of his friends nearby.

The gem starts to glow, trails of blue-green magic--more blue than green--heading straight through the camp and over the curve of a hill. 

"Ah, I think Jackie went in that direction," Henrik says. "Our Jackie I mean, I know you have a Jackie too." There are also fainter, barely-there lines of green magic tracing down the river. "And that is the way we came from," Henrik says. "Towards Suilthair, the capital."

Dr. J studies the magic and hums. “Well… Alt said blue is nearby- and green is farther away so… maybe we should head that way to see.”

"Yes, great idea." Henrik nods. "Vsevna, do you mind finding Chase and Jameson and telling them about what happened? I'll go with these two to search." 

"You don't want anyone else to come?" Vsevna asks. 

"I will be fine for a short walk," Henrik says. 

"Alright, then. You all be careful. When you get back, I do not doubt those two will want to meet these two. Especially you." Vsevna looks at Dr. J. "I think Jameson would like to meet another him."

Dr. J smiles and laughs lightly, “I’m quite eager to meet him as well.” 

Henny jumps a bit, excited to see more of their friends. “let us get going then!!” He looks about ready to run up the hill himself.

Henrik grins. It's strange seeing someone with his face so enthusiastic, but nice, in a way. "Okay, okay, let's go." He starts off after the magic. "Meet us back here!" 

"You have it!" Vsevna agrees, and goes to look for Henrik's other two friends. 

◈━◈━◈━◈━◈━◈━◈━◈━◈

The fall is just as rough for Jackie, though he has a softer landing than the other two. Relatively speaking. 

Jackie cries out as he hits the ground and rubs at his head, "Jesus fucking christ!" He curses, blinking the spots out of his eyes. The hell was all of that?! Alt didn't mention any of that! Fucking.... Marvin. This wasn't going to be relaxing at all was it? 

He landed on grass-covered ground, near a copse of trees. There's maybe about seven or eight of them, nowhere near a big forest. Nearby there's an old stump, like one of the trees collapsed. 

SHING! THUMP! A knife flies through the air and smacks against the stump, gouging a mark in the wood but not getting embedded in it. "Cadé aan saolile?! Hwaet!" 

Jackie stiffens as he hears the knife fly and startles backwards in surprise, falling onto his back with a oof. Then he rolls to look at who yelled. 

There's a man standing about thirty feet away, wearing a bright red cloak and a white mask shaped like a wolf. "Kárth inigh tu?! Ní fedire leata beitle like that! Didn't you see me?!" The translator spell kicks in mid-sentence. 

Hey- that's a cool cloak! Jackie pushes himself up and wipes the grass off him before waving at the other man, "Uhhh h-hey there!"

"...wait a moment." The man looks him up and down, noticing his strange clothes. He pulls his mask off to reveal--Jackie's own face! Just with less stubble and longer hair. "You're not--are you--I'm so sorry about almost hitting you, by the way, I-I was practicing, I'm not very good at range--But--are you...?" He gives Jackie another look. "Those clothes. Like the other ones."

Jackie's eyes widen. Then, he grins, laughing a bit nervously. "Ah well... A-Alt told me to expect this so... not as weird as it could be." He walks closer, sticking his hands in his pockets casually. "Oh don't worry it's chill. S'hard to predict someone just- coming outta nowhere. I wouldn't have blamed ya if you had hit me!" He laughs. Then he offers his hand. "I'm Jackie... Jackie Mann. ...but that feels dumb to say now cuz- you're... me. Fantasy me... I mean- who else would you be, right? " He laughs more, a bit more nervously," and uh yeah! Alt and Bro wanted to bring us here to meet you so... hi? ha- ...im talking too much, fuck-"

Jackie--this other Jackie--laughs. "No, it's okay! I talk a lot, too. Nice to meet you, Jackie Mann. I'm Jackie, son of Fiona." He holds his hand out. The motion draws attention to the wealth of weapons on his person. A sword on his hip, a sword on his back, several sheathed knives across his chest--holy shit. It's all safely secured but that's a lot. "You all have unfortunate placing with this realm jumping of yours. Last time, Chase says that your Alt friend showed up as he was loosing an arrow."

Jackie Mann's eyes widen, "Holy fuck that's a lot of weapons..." He breathes out in surprise. 

Other Jackie looks down at his chest. "I don't usually have the knives," he says, as if that is the only bit of weaponry his other version is reacting to. 

But then Jackie Mann laughs and shakes his head, "Yeah uh- Alt warned us about how... mixed jumping is. Said it can be good or like- really bad luck. So... sounds about right." He then straightens a bit as he remembers how Alt and Bro looked right before they fell and he curses again, quickly looking around. "Ah fuck right! Speaking of Alt i... s-something happened to him and Chase- my Chase... Bro! I don't know what but... i know for sure that fucking bastard Mag is behind it." He looks back to Jackie with a bit of desperation, "I was willing to take this all slow but... n-now im really worried. Can you help me find them?"

Jackie’s eyes widen as the other him talks. "Ah! Right, yes, okay. Elders damn it, uh--" He turns around. "We'll talk as we go back to camp. That'll cut down on time. Is it just the three of you and that 'magician' guy? Because I have to say, you appeared at a bit of a difficult time. We're on the move right now. Trying to get back to the main base."

"No uh... Henny and Dr. J are here too... your Jameson and Henrik-" Jackieboy explains while looking to keep up with the Phantom Mask Jackie. He frowns at hearing this and looks around, "Damn... shitty timing for real... Bro was like- super excited for us to see the- the dragon thing! God.... nothing's ever that simple, huh?"

"Oh, um... yyyyea." Jackie winces. "Wyvernlair was discovered. We were chased out a couple weeks ago. So..." He laughs. "Nothing's ever that simple for sure. We have a new base at the Cliffs of Feall. It's on the south end of the mountains."

"Fuck man..." Jackie Mann sighs. "Well- I'll stick with you but... hopefully we can find the others soon..."

Jackie nods. "Hopefully. Last time both of them appeared in Wyvernlair so they shouldn't be too far away. Even if that Magnificent appeared farther--that's not a good sign--whoa, what?" He squints at the field ahead of them, dotted with slight hills. "Do you see that glowing? Is that a will o'the wisp? We should probably stay clear."

Jackie Mann nods along, trying to make sure he's listening. ...he took his ADHD meds today right? He then perks up as he hears the other him and sees the glowing, "Oh! That's the spell Alt set up for us to find each other! jesus how did i almost forget that??" He laughs and messes with his hair, "At least one of the others remembered...."

"Really? Oh, useful!" Jackie grins, speeding up a little. "I wonder if we can use something like that. Marvin used a tracking spell to find Chase and Jameson while in Suilthair, maybe there's a talisman that can do the same." 

"I think that's what Alt made! If he's okay... I'm sure he'd love to show you guys how... He talked our ears off trying to explain it!" Jackie Mann laughs. 

The two of them go over the top of the hill, and-- 

"Ah, Jackie!" Henrik waves. Dr. J and Henny are with him. "And another Jackie, I think?"

As they crest the hill, Jackie Mann relaxes at seeing his friends. "Hen! Jays!" 

Dr. J also relaxes and waves, "oh good- Jackie's alright..." 

"JACKIEEEE!!" Henny shouts and waves his hand wildly, "HALLO MEIN FRIEND!!!" 

The two Jackie's reach the others and Jackie Mann laughs, "Jesus Hen- s'only been a few minutes! You're gonna wake up the whole shore!" 

"Ah yes Henrik... maybe it's best to... try to keep it a bit quieter?" Dr. J suggests, warily looking around.

"Ah, actually, we are quite isolated right now," Henrik says. "And we have scouts out even farther who would alert us if anyone comes close. You'd know if someone was around who can hear us." 

"Always better to be cautious, though." Jackie says that, but he's smiling and playing with the edge of his cloak. It's just so exciting to meet more people from this other world! Especially himself. "But, uh, I don't think anyone's sleeping right now so you're not going to 'wake up the whole shore'." 

"That is true," Henrik says. 

Dr. J sighs in relief and nods, “that’s good to know…” 

Jackie Mann blushes a bit and rubs his head more, “That… makes sense. Dunno why I… said that… when it’s… day…”

"Now, brief introductions.” Henrik says, “Jackie, this is the other Jameson and the other me. And you two, this is Jackie. The Jackie from this world." 

"This is going to get confusing fast," Jackie mutters. "It was bad enough with just Chase."

Dr. J laughs softly, “to avoid confusion you can call me JJ, or Jay. Doesn’t seem like you use the Dr. title much here.” 

“Eh you’ll always be a Dr, to us, Doc,” Jackie Mann says with a grin. 

“You can call me Henny! It is nickname that I like very much!” Henny says with bright enthusiasm. 

“And uh… well my wife calls me Jackieboy. S’kinds long but… you all could call me that… to help.” He laughs again with a shrug. “Even if we haven’t been to as many worlds as Alt and Ch-Bro… we get how confusing it can get.”

Jackie nods. "Got it. Under lock up here." He taps the side of his head. 

Henrik smiles. "I am a doctor, actually. But you are right. It is not usually a, ah... title.”

Dr. J laughs quietly and nods, “Ah right. Forgive me, Dr.” 

“Oh! And did they get home alright after they left here?" Henrik continues. 

"Of course they did, otherwise they wouldn't have been able to tell their friends about us," Jackie points out. 

"...right." Henrik winces. "I'm sorry. I am still..." 

Jackie pats him on the shoulder. "Don't worry about it, Schneep. We get it." 

JJ then tilts his head at Henrik as he winces, curiosity in his expression.

Henrik nods. "Alright. Jackies, I told Vsevna to get Chase and Jameson to meet us at the shore. We have to talk about things." 

"Ah, you're involving him, are you?" Jackie says, grinning. "Glad to see it." 

"Shut up. He was there when these two appeared. I-it's practical." 

"But you would tell him anyway." 

"...yes." Henrik nods. "He was so disappointed to hear that he missed the last two's visit. He loves new places, you know this." 

Jackie laughs. "Yea, I do." He becomes serious for a moment. "The things we have to talk about involve those other two, doesn't it? Jackieboy told me that something happened." 

"Yes, it does." Henrik nods. 

"Well, you three wait to give us all the details until we find Chase and Jameson," Jackie says, starting back towards camp.

Jackieboy looks between Jackie and Henrik and smirks, going to change the subject until they get to camp, “mmm? I’m sensing something here… with this Vsevna guy?” 

“Oh yes, other me and him were very friendly on the boat!” Henny points out. 

“Yo you guys landed on a boat?! That’s fucking sick!” 

Dr. J smiles as he watches Henny and Jackieboy talk. He sticks close to the thems from this world, still anxiously glancing around them. He plays with the chain of his pocket watch as they all follow them down to camp.

"They're courting each other," Jackie immediately says. 

"Jackie!" Henrik shoves him--which honestly doesn't move the other man that much. "I-it is a recent... development." 

"Aaaand they both had feelings for each other foreeeeever," Jackie continues teasingly. 

"I will shove a smoke potion down your throat." 

"Nooo that's probably poisonous!" 

Jackieboy grins, “I knew it! Alt’s the same way about Oliver.” 

“As if you’re not completely love sick every time Zara comes home.” Dr. J comments. 

“Hey! That’s my wife! I’m allowed to be love sick about her!” Jackieboy replies.

The banter continues as they go down into camp. With the appearance of a new stranger in different clothes, the glances resume, but no one says anything as the group continues towards the shore of the river. 

Vsevna waits there, as well as three others. The Swaps don't know them, but they can figure out who they are. Chase has his bow and quiver close by, the deer mask on his belt (with the antlers pointing down to stop them from poking his stomach.) Jameson is fidgeting with a bandage around his arm, the rabbit mask around his neck. And the third man runs right up to the group. "Hey! What gives?! You send your partner to find those two but not me?!" 

"Ah... hi, Marvin," Henrik says awkwardly. "I-I was... I thought you would still be busy." 

"No, but if I was, I would still want to know about this! Fuck!" Marvin sighs. "It's alright," he says in a softer voice. "I understand." His cat mask is pushed back onto his head. An actual cat walks from his side up to the newcomers, sniffing them. 

The swaps blink at the sight of the others. And Jackie actually seems a bit startled to see Marvin run up to the group. Ah… weird seeing Marvin’s face… not corrupted now. It makes his stomach churn. 

Henny looks excited to see everyone, “oh wows! Other Juwel and Chase! So good to be meetings you!!” Then he gasps in delight at seeing the cat and bends down to let him sniff him, “Oh mein god! Tiny Kätzchen! Oh you are so pretty Hallo!!” 

Marvin laughs. "That's Draco. He's my familiar." Draco sniffs Henny's hand and then shoves his face into it, practically forcing him to pet him. 

“Hallo Draco!! You are very very pretty!!” Henny coos, giving Draco all the best pets. He’s so tiny compared to Sahne though so he’s trying to be gentle. 

"So good to meet you guys too." Chase smiles. There's a strange tiredness to it, but it's no less warm. 

Jackie lifts a hand to wave at the others, “uh… sup?” 

Chase blinks "Um... 'soup' to you too." 

Jackie bursts into laughter at Chase saying soup. “Hahaha! I guess I need to chill with the… words I use huh?” 

“That’s gonna be so hard for you,” Dr. J lightly teases. He nods politely to everyone. “Pleasant to meet you all… you can call me Jj or Jay. To hopefully avoid confusion… and call our Jackie, Jackieboy and our Henrik, Henny.” He gestures to the others as he introduces them. 

Jameson looks at his other self and gives a small smile. Pleasure to meet you, he signs. 

"Oh, wait." Marvin grabs his amulet. It starts to glow white, and he pulls some of the light away. He gently throws it at Jameson, and it swirls around him for a moment before dissipating. "Try again." Jameson nods. It's nice to meet you, he signs, and small transcriptions appear to each of the newcomers. They're not really there, just in their minds, like a personal set of subtitles. 

Dr. J and Jackieboy blink at the strange hand signs- then look fascinated at the subtitles. 

Jackieboy grins, “Damn… where was that spell when I was learning sign for Henny?” He laughs. 

“We both didn’t know magic existed then,” Dr. J replies. 

Jackie rubs the back of his head, “ahh… maybe for you-“ 

Henny looks up and sees the subtitles and his eyes sparkle. “Oh!! How cool!! Hallo other Juwel!!”

Dr. J sighs, “I hate to ruin the mood but.. I’m afraid we don’t come with… the best news.” 

Everyone becomes serious once more as Dr. J mentions having bad news. "Yes, it's that other villain of yours, da?" Vsevna says. 

"Magnificent," Marvin says darkly. "Bastard." 

"They also mentioned something about... something happening to Chase and Alt?" Jackie recalls. 

Chase's expression flashes to worry. "Go on."

When the tone shifts Henny gets to his feet and stands by his friends, nervously fiddling with his watch. 

Dr. J sighs but nods, “We’re not sure in what state they could be in… all we know is… M-Magnificent,” he shudders as he says his name, “Managed to grab Alt and the device we used to get here right as he was using it to come here. And whatever magic he used… it… it hurt them somehow.” 

“They were screaming,” Jackieboy says, holding his arms, “It was awful… everything around us started to… to break. Like glass.” 

Henny looks nervous, “But um… we have our bracelets so… maybe we can try to find them before Magnificent does…! We have to hope, ja?”

The guys all look very concerned when JJ reports what happened. 

Jameson and Chase catch his reaction to Magnificent as well, and exchange sympathetic glances. “There’s always hope,” Jackie says. “How do the talismans work?” 

“They used one earlier,” Henrik recalls. “There were two faint trails pointing that way.” And he points down the river. 

Jameson winces. Back towards the city? 

“I thought we agreed that staying there was bad,” Chase mutters. “That spirit is going to be waiting for us. And we already have a, uh, quest.” 

“It’s not a time sensitive one,” Marvin points out. “At least, Sam didn’t give me the impression it was.” 

“You all know you’re probably confusing the strangers,” Vsevna says, folding his arms.

“To be fair- all of this is confusing…” Jackieboy sighs, “We thought by now… alt and bro would have found us. Cuz you know- Alt can glitch and Bro can fly…” 

Dr. J nods, “The first trail we used led us to Jackie… so Alt and Bro must be the other way, down the river. Didn’t you all say that was the capital? S..Suilthair, I think you said.” 

Henny fiddles more with his watch, looking nervous. “Oh… what if something did happen to them?! Is this city… dangerous?” 

Henrik laughs. Then covers his mouth. “I’m sorry, that is not funny, I don’t know why I laughed.” 

“Suilthair is where the King lives,” Chase explains. “It’s his home. Which… I’m going to assume your friends told you how bad he is, but it’s worse than we thought two seasons ago. It turns out the King is possessed. Do you… have possessive spirits where you’re from?” 

“They’re very rare even here,” Marvin adds. 

“Yes.” Chase nods. “A-and the one controlling the King is very powerful.” He laughs darkly. “Turns out, I was communicating with the real King all this time. Through… magic dreams. That sounds ridiculous, I know, but it’s true. Do you guys know someone named Jack in your world? Or Aodhan, that’s his given name. They’re both very common names so maybe that doesn’t help… anyway I’m talking too much. Sorry. The point is, King Aodhan has been possessed for about seven years now and the spirit is the one doing terrible things.” He pauses. “Sorry. That’s a lot to just drop at your feet. But it’s been a while since your friends visited. A lot has happened.”

All the swaps eyes widen. 

“…yeah they told us about the king but… d-damn… that’s… insane.” Jackieboy mutters. He’s dealt with possession but… not by any evil spirits. 

Dr. J looks disturbed, grabbing his watch for comfort. “7 years… I-imagine being trapped in your own mind for so long…” 

“But Alt said he… he scared the King off last time! With his ah- lightning Phoenix thing! Surely… he would not go after them again… right?” Henny adds with worry. 

“…but Magnificent would…” Jackieboy mumbles bitterly.

“Oh yeah, that thunderbird thing he did!” Jackie gasps. “Elders. Yea, if I was a possessive spirit I wouldn’t want to mess with that.” 

“Yeah…” Chase nods, a bit distractedly. He’s thinking about what JJ said, about being trapped in your own mind for so long. He has to find some way to help Jack, he really does.

“I’m guessing Magnificent doesn’t have a helpful tracking bracelet,” Marvin drawls. “So we can’t know what he’s doing. It’s possible that he’s with them.” 

"God i really really hope not..." Jackieboy mutters, gripping at his arm, "Poor Alt is always being targeted by that maniac... but... I dunno. He can't seem to keep Chase down for too long! So... maybe it'll be okay?" He doesn't look too sure. 

That settles it, we must go back, Jameson says. 

“Are you sure, Jair?” Marvin asks gently. 

Jameson nods. You all came back for us. We need to go back for them. 

“If that is our plan, I will get some of the crew to ready sail,” Vsevna says. “Everyone else must finish packing up. Don’t worry about leaving tents behind, we have extras and we can stay on the boat at night if needed.” And with that, he heads off. Henrik glances at the others before following him. The group can vaguely hear him asking Vsevna about what a ‘fee-niks’ is.

Dr. J watches Vsevna rush off and looks back at the others, "...how far away is the capital from here?"

Not far enough, Jameson comments. We sailed all of the previous day to get here. 

“So about eight to ten hours by boat,” Jackie sums up. “On foot it’s quite a bit longer. Hence, boat.” 

“I can help a bit with my doorways,” Marvin offers. 

“You spent so much magic yesterday, though,” Chase says. 

“I know my limits. And if we want a small group to cut away some distance, I can help.” 

“We’ll keep that in mind, but for now let’s stick with boat travel,” Jackie says.

Dr. J nods and holds his arms, suppressing a shiver. He should have brought more layers… he thought they’d all be more prepared. Then again… none of them were expecting this to happen. “Alright that’s… not ideal. But not terrible either.” 

“Yeah Alt said it was a lot of travel last time too- at least for him and Bro, who are massive cheaters.” Jackieboy tries to laugh, “They don’t gotta walk around like us normal guys.” 

“Is there anything we can do to help?” Henny asks timidly. “We do not want to be such a burden… or cause you all to use too much magics or energy!”

Chase smiles. "Don't worry too much about it. Maybe just help us pack up some of this stuff. And tell us more about how things are in your other world. If there's anything you guys can think of that would be helpful, it'd be great to know." 

"Do you guys have a way to speed up time to make us go faster?" Marvin says jokingly.

Dr. J and Henny exchange glances, Henny fiddling more with his watch. “Well… I ah… do have… time magics… I have not tried to speed up time before though… do you think I could, Juwel?” 

Dr. J rubs his arms and shakes his head, “Ummm I don’t know if now is the best time to experiment Henrik…” 

“Other things hm…” Jackie thinks, “um… nothing of note I don’t think. Things have been kinda… tame since Alt and Bro got back from their first trip with the TRVLR… even mag has kinda left us alone. Alt’s mostly just been trying to get better at his magic…” He sighs and shakes his head, “It’s times like this I wish I had some kind of magic… if we could just… see if they’re okay… maybe we wouldn’t need to worry so much… but- can’t FaceTime in a place with no wifi-“ 

“Jackie… so many of those words are going to confuse them,” Dr. J sighs. 

“I understand them now!” Henny says brightly, “It would be useful to use our handys-“ 

“Henny I’m begging you not to call it-“ Dr. J starts to say as Jackie holds back a snicker.

“No please keep calling it that dude, god I love it so much!” Jackieboy giggles. 

“You are such a child,” Dr. J shakes his head, but he does smile a bit. 

Honestly, it seems like the rest of the group stops listening the moment Henny says he has time magics. They all stare at the group with expressions caught between shock and blankness.

"Did you... just imply... that your magic controls time?" Jackie says haltingly. 

"To borrow a phrase I heard your friends use," Marvin says. "What. The actual. Fuck."

The swaps blink and then look at each other. Henny laughs nervously, “oh yes ah… I forget that… that is unusual.” 

“It’s really cool!” Jackieboy grins proudly. “Henny once used it to save Bro from Mag!” 

Henny blushes, fiddling with his watch. “Um… I could… try to… demonstrate?” He asks timidly, not really meeting the Phantoms’ eyes. “I am… still trying to… figure it out but… it is not… magics I was born with. I use this.” He holds up his watch, and the clock’s face glows teal as his eyes do too.

Henrik returns at that very moment. “Why are you all standing here still?” 

“Your other self can control time,” Chase states. 

Henrik blinks. “What?” Then when Henny takes his watch out he gasps and leans close. “Oooo! What an interesting device! I hear they are making things like those back in my home of Alterde. But without the magic, I mean. Where did you find this?”

Henny smiles and looks at Dr. J, “Well… Juwel collects these watches… and he just so happened to give me this one. But it is.. from our past. And It just… came to life with magic one day.” 

Dr. J chuckles, “I still think part of it is you, Henrik. The watch never showed any kind of magic for me or my step father. But… Alt is far more knowledgeable about that than me.” 

“I mean- from what I know… s’not unheard of for someone with magic to like- need something to make it stronger. Like… needing crutches!” Jackieboy comments. 

Henny blushes more. 

Jackieboy nudges him a bit. “C’mon bro! Show it off! You’re not usually this shy!” 

Henny looks away and mumbles, “ah… we are making it seem more… fantastical than it actually is…” 

"Fantastical?! I don't know what it's like where you're from, but controlling time itself is fantasy here!" Marvin says. "Do you know how many theories I've read of wizards and oracles and sometimes sorcerers trying to do that and failing?! Time is just--time is as controllable as the Wyldlands are! Trust us, anything you can do will be amazing." 

"And everyone here has their share of abilities, too," Henrik says. "If you ware worried about standing out. People may be confused but they are very accepting o-of the strange here." 

"Oh! After this, we need to get you guys some new clothes," Jackie says. "We have some spares in storage, everyone will have to lend stuff. I mean, if you all want."

Henny blushes more and fiddles with the dial. 

Dr. J perks up at the mention of clothes, “Oh that would be… much appreciated. I didn't account for the chill here…” 

“Well i feel fine-“ Jackieboy shrugs. 

“How you don’t constantly burn up in that jacket is beyond me,” Jj mutters. 

“Before that though! Let Henny show you!! C’mere Schneep i got an idea!” Jackieboy pulls the taller swap down to him and signs something to him in BSL. 

Henny’s eyes light up and he giggles, looking kind of excited. “Oh… that could be funny!” He looks back at the others and grins as his eyes light up teal. 

To everyone else- it seems like nothing has changed. But to Henny, he paused time for just a few minutes and has gone around and switched the others’ masks around, so everyone is not wearing their own. He then stands behind them and restarts time and sharply whistles to get them to turn around. To the fantasy boys, It looks like Henny in a blink of an eye had just appeared behind them!

The guys are left staring at the spot where Henny was. Jackie turns around immediately in surprise, followed by Chase. Henrik, Marvin, and Jameson need to take a moment to process what just happened. Then Jameson laughs--an odd voiceless breathing--and that queues Jackie and Chase to start laughing, too. Henrik and Marvin look more confused and intrigued than anything. 

"Wait a moment!" Marvin reaches up and feels his mask. Why does it have antlers? "Wait a--wait a moment!" 

"Elders, you're wearing mine!" Chase laughs. He grabs the mask on his belt, finding a rabbit instead of a deer. "Whoa! Hey! Did you just--" 

"Amazing!" Henrik gasps, taking off Jackie's mask. 

"How did you notice that your own mask was different before you noticed anyone else's?" Jackie asks Marvin. 

"You didn't notice, either. Now give me my mask back." 

They all swap their masks around again. 

That is incredible! Jameson says, grinning.

Henny giggles and looks at them proudly, “He he… it was nothing… but it was fun to see your reactions!” 

Jackieboy whoops and jumps up, “Yeah!! That turned out amazing! Just like something in a comic book!” 

“Of course you got the idea from there,” Dr. J laughs. 

Henny looks down at his watch and smiles, “as far as I know… I can stop time… and then I can go back… but not too far back. The farther I do… the more it drains me.” 

“Yeah! When he saved Bro apparently he went back a whole day!! And then he was out cold for like 3!” Jackieboy exclaims. 

Henny nods, “And uh… oh! I can make things do the… the floating! And stop certain things- like it is ummm frozen!”

"That is so, um, 'cool!'" Chase says. "Did I--did I use the word right?" 

"Sounds right to me," Jackie says cheerfully. 

Jackie laughs and nods, “Yeah you guys got it!” 

"That is--that's--" Marvin laughs. He's bouncing a little. "That is--wow. That's--" He laughs again. 

Henrik grins. "It has been a while since I saw you so excited Marvin. So, ah, 'giddy.'" 

"I-I like magic!" Marvin grabs his amulet again, holding it in his fist and shaking it--that's not him using his own magic, that's just him being excited. The amulet is very shakeable. "Going back into the past? That's--I mean, of course it would use a lot of energy, all magic uses energy. But still! That's--Elders and Sisters, that's--that's great." 

Jameson laughs that silent laugh again. I know what you mean. Being able to change the present is incredible. Anyone can change the future with the right actions, but... well, I suppose the present was once the future. He looks thoughtful. 

"Okay, okay." Jackie shakes himself. "We have to focus. That was--that was very 'cool,' but we have stuff to do. Um, how about I show you guys the tent where we've been storing our clothes? Everyone brought their own but we put all the bags in one tent.”

“Can’t believe we taught people from the past how to use the word ‘cool’…” Jackieboy grins mischievously, “Ohhh the power we could holddd!” He jokes in a weird deep voice. 

Dr. J rolls his eyes and baps Jackie on the head. “No no- stop that.” 

Henny laughs, “Yes yes we can do that! Please do the leading for us!”

"Great!" Jackie grins. "It's right this way." He starts to turn around, then looks back at the others. "And the rest of you?" 

"We'll start packing our stuff," Chase says. 

Henrik nods. "Yes. And then we should start to help load it." 

"Wait, if everyone brought their own clothes, whose clothes are they going to wear?" Marvin asks. 

"I mean, I was going to let them wear mine if they wanted," Jackie says. 

“Oh! It is like getting hand me downs from mein brothers!” Henny says excitedly. 

“You get so excited about the simplest things, Hen,” Jackieboy laughs. 

And if they don't fit, feel free to look through mine, Jameson adds. In fact, I'll go with you to point them out. He pauses. And I'll also point out that we're not REALLY from 'the past', it's just that your world is a bit ahead of ours in terms of tools and such. 

Dr. J smiles at his other self and nods, “Excellent point! I think Jackie just wishes this was our past-“ He chuckles. 

"Ah, you say 'garden' I say 'garden'," Jackie says dismissively. The phrase doesn't really make sense to the Swaps. Clearly this saying doesn't translate well. "Let's go, guys. It's just this way." And he starts walking again.The swaps follow after Jackie.

Jameson starts to follow Jackie and the visitors, but Chase pulls him back for a moment. "Do you... think Alt and other-Chase are okay?" he asks quietly. 

I don't know, Jameson says. I can't look into their futures at will. But... they were quite tough. Even if things aren't good right now, I'm sure they will be. 

Chase nods slowly. "Okay. You're right." He lets go. "Go on, then." Jameson smiles a little. 

We'll be sure to hurry, he says, and follows.

◈━◈━◈━◈━◈━◈━◈━◈━◈

It took a couple hours for the King to gather some of his special forces, appoint a regent (a blonde woman who Magnificent could sense strong magic from), and commandeer the city's ferry to get everyone to the lake shore. Unfortunately, they could not commandeer a boat to sail down the river. Aneirin explained that he'd tried to keep boats limited to prevent too many people from leaving the city without his knowing. But that decision was coming back to bite them now, which he cursed. They would have to proceed along the bank of the Muinra Avon on foot and horseback--since horses were easy to acquire from the stable attached to the ferry docks. Now they were off. The Green Lake--with Suilthair in the center--is shrinking into the distance.

Magnificent didn’t mind…well once the King allowed him to be on one of the horses. Even if it was… embarrassing to have to be lead by the hero. But- horse lessons weren’t really something he got to learn. It was annoying to not have a direct line to the rebels… One thing he didn’t like about this world was the need for traditional traveling. But, the magic thick air more than made up for that. He breathed in and felt the magic flowing strongly in his veins. A very valuable resource for making sure the Brodys stayed under. Magnificent watched with a smug smile as he sees Alt travel in front of them on foot, using the tracking bracelet to keep them on the right path. Seeing his cub so loyal was such a sight to see… 

The King glances over at Magnificent from his own horse--tall and with a jet black coat. "Enjoying yourself?" he says, a small smile on his face. "I'll guess this is very... satisfying for you." He nods at Bro and Alt.

Magnificent blinks and then grins wide, “Oh yes… very much so~!” He giggles. He glances back at Alt and hums. “I’ve had Alt under my thrall many times before… even made him my pet. So… I do enjoy seeing him caught in my power~!” He then glances at Bro and his eyes flash, watching him stoically follow after Alt, now dressed in a warrior’s outfit too. “But… it is so rare to get the annoying hero too! So I can’t wait to see how this plays out~ to see the hope drain from all those other pathetic puppets eyes!” He giggles madly, leaning against his horse’s head.

The King grins. "There is a sort of... vicious delight in finally getting what you've always wanted from them." Aneirin looks down at his hands--Aodhan's hands--and tightens his grip on the reins. "Personally, I can't wait to see that look in those rebels' eyes. Fools trying to undo what can't be undone. They'll see what they get." 

Magnificent shares Aneirin's grin, "Exactly~!" 

Alt is walking a bit farther ahead than the horses. As such, he has an unobstructed view of the sky. There's a bird up there. A small bird, its wingspan about fifteen inches long. It has brown feathers, a V-shaped tail, and wings that sort of look like a boomerang. Has it... been there for a while? Wait a second, is it circling them?

Alt pauses a bit in his walking and takes notice of the sky. As he registers the way he has seen this bird circling, his eyes narrow. He then pulls out his bow and nocks an arrow, lighting the end with some lightning. He aims to shoot it down.

The arrow goes a bit too wide. Which is understandable, this is a small bird that is flying very fast. 

The King's head snaps towards Alt. "A klaíoh, why did you shoot?" He calls. Then he looks up into the sky and sees the bird. "Because of that? That's just a swift, they're common in this area. They are not messenger birds, if that's what you were concerned about."

Alt startles at the King's voice and then looks back towards him and bows slightly, "Ah... sorry, mu Ríth. I thought it... could have been one of the Rebel's birds..." He looks embarrassed now and apologetically looks away. "I-I'll stay more focused... Apologizes." 

The King narrows his eyes slightly, then nods. "Your intentions were just. But in the future, bring it to our attention before taking action. We don't want to waste arrows." 

"Of course, mu Ríth..." Alt mumbles quietly. 

As Alt looks away, and as the King is too busy reproaching him, the swift in the sky does something... strange. There's a flash of light, and it suddenly jumps ahead in position. The jump is accompanied by a snap, a snap that... for some reason, brings lightning to mind. And then it turns and flies away. Like any other bird would. Maybe that weird jump was just his imagination.

Alt sees the swift seem to jump and his eyes widen slightly, staring after the bird. Magnificent watches with mild fascination, his eyes narrowing as he sees the swift jump. Strange... 

Bro keeps leading them to go forward, not really paying attention to anything but the path. 

"Very good." The King nods, turning his attention back to the river beside them. The rebels had a boat... they're probably still using that boat now. They should be prepared to board. Meaning he should save his power. But these enchantment powers cost very little. He experimentally reaches out mentally, but still finds no human minds within range. And they probably won't for a while. "If the rebels made camp at night, they could be twelve hours away by now," he mutters. "We need to prepare for long travels."

Alt gets snapped out of watching the swift and starts a little before getting back on track following the spell. "Y-Yes, your majesty." 

"We won't rest until we find them, mu Ríth." Bro answers dazedly but with determination. 

Magnificent frowns then nods, leaning on his horse more to watch the landscape. 

This was going to be slow going for a bit... but it would be worth the wait. 

[sophiethewitch1]

I'm so glad to see people point out how bad genshin has gotten. we have had 2 (TWO) male characters this whole region. and they just killed off the captain??? I'm PISSED!!! all the female characters suck too. they power creep existing characters and mechanics, their designs are so weird and out of place from genshin, their characters are so shallow etc.

I'm genuinely so surprised to see older players stick around. their hard earned artifacts, weapons, and attention to detail feels like it was ran over by mauvikas motorcycle. let's talk abt muavika, she's an expensive xiangling replacement. usually new archons shake up the game, she doesn't. yea she can fly, so can wanderer, chasca, kinich, etc, she can ride on water, most cryo units can too, and furina and mualani and Mona kinda, she has ok Pyro application, so does Thoma, xiangling, dehya, u get what I'm saying?

THE FANSERVICE OMG. if honkai has hot men, genshin is the other side of the spectrum. mualani has the weakest excuse for clothes, xilonens and citlalis jiggle physics gotcha ogling, chasca is wearing... that... and muavika has a zipper going up her cooch 😭😬 it's not hard to see how sexualixed all of them are.

I find it hard to believe that they can't make any more dudes. both guys we do have look too much like teens. I don't even wanna get into the race problem cuz 😬😬 everything that can be said already has been.

meta has been better, we have a geo kazuha now. yay. everyone else has been a main dps, subdps for nightsoul or a niche support. other than xilonen, I wouldn't pull for anyone else metawise. we desperately needed a better shielder, we got a wonky 5 star Layla. zhongli has been needing a buff desperately, if hoyo thinks he is the ceiling for shield strength. maulani, kinich, and chasca are all main dps, I don't even know what ororon and kachina do.

exploration is fine, there are chests everywhere, maybe to distract the players who find the dragons mechanics to be chunky and annoying. the region really wants you to have natlan characters though, and if you don't, you struggle a bit more. it looks pretty though, the art direction and landscapes are beautiful. plenty screenshots to squeeze in with the 5000000 gb game. I don't wanna get into the story, this ask has gotten wayyy too long

anyways, thanks for coming to my Ted talk. hopefully they do shneznaya justice.

get it

just(ice)

ha ha ha I'm so funni

oh my god you're literally so correct about everything and im so mad about it. like the racial issues first and foremost made me immediately go 'well guess im not spending anymore' which i havent since because the only character like you said thats been interesting at all has been xilonen. she, kachina, and mualani were the only characters in natlan i actually liked the designs of (well other than the captain but hes not even actually from natlan). and even then LIKE BRO MY SUSPENSION OF DISBELIEF BRUH!!!!!! like people are like 'oh it makes sense lore wise oh its ancient dragon tech' WELL IT DOESNT FUCKING LOOK LIKE IT!!! WHY DOES MAVUIKA HAVE A YAMAHA!!!! WHY DOES EVEN MY FAV XILONEN HAVE A TURN TABLE LIKE I CANT DO THIS AAAAHH. The exploration and world is amazing because it always is and I saw this poster the other day who fuckin. GRINDED my gears over on reddit who was like 'people hated this regions story?' and then posted a bunch of beautiful natlan screenshots like BRO YOU AND YOUR STRAWMAN ARGUMENTS YOU COME HERE!!!

I think if I personally talk about the fanservice I'll pop a blood vessel. Anon if you have not seen the leaks for 5.4 you are in for a TERRIBLE surprise when they show the next character and I am so so SO sorry for the misery you will endure

Snezhnaya... Give me Dottore. Give me Panatalone. Give me the fucking short old man hoyo or I will start sending thousands of dollars of manure to your offices to be dropped off. God help us all

[sage-lights]

if i could i'd freeze this moment

for @baflegacy’s smosh girlies week day 8 prompt: free day! word count: 1510 title from: "anaheim" by niki (this fic has literally been plaguing me for weeks. i've been running into writer's block after writer's block trying to finish it and it's literally past midnight where i am and i'm still not completely happy with it, but at least i finished it!)

It's getting dark out, the last glimmers of sunlight disappearing behind endless rows of snow-covered trees. The ground is pristinely powdered, not a single footprint marring the even surface. Everything is still out here.

Angela leans against the wooden railing of the back deck, admiring the landscape. Behind her is the sliding glass door that leads back into the cabin, cracked open enough for her to hear the loud "Come on’s!" and "Hell yeah’s!" of her friends.

She turn around for a brief second, observing how rowdy everyone is. Most of the Smosh cast and crew are squished together on the couch or floor. They’ve gathered around the TV and placed bets on the (very serious) Super Smash Bros tournament. A few are scattered throughout the open kitchen, chatting, laughing, and paying attention to the game with one ear.

The scene inside the cabin is bathed in the golden lamp light, cozy and familiar. But right now, that warmth is suffocating.

Angela’s glad that Ian and Anthony were able to finally pull this off. There had been whispers of bringing back Smosh Summer Games since the beginning of the year. But with the summer already packed full of different programming, the difficulties of finding a sponsor, and the sheer amount of pre-production required for a shoot of this scale, they ultimately decided it wouldn’t be feasible. Instead, they pivoted their efforts towards a revamped Smosh Winter Games, giving them more time to plan and elevate the event to the same caliber as Summer Games.

Based on the few days they've had already, Angela understands why Summer and Winter Games are so beloved by everyone. The games are insane, the rivalries are already forming, and every day, the stakes climb higher and higher.

Though, as much as Angela enjoys the constant excitement buzzing in the air, a lingering anxiety courses through her. She has yet to tell anyone the big news. At first, she convinced herself not to mention it yet because everyone was busy preparing for Winter Games. And now that they’re here in Big Bear, she’s created a new excuse to rationalize keeping this secret for even longer—she doesn’t want to detract from everyone relaxing and enjoying all their hard work by making herself the center of attention.

However, it’s been eating away at her. These days, the confession sits at the tip of her tongue, on the verge of slipping out anytime she has a conversation with someone.

She's snapped out of her thoughts when she hears the door squeakily roll open, forcing her back to the present moment. It's Amanda, with a drink in one hand and waving at her with the other. As she shuts the door, a cool breeze cuts through and Angela shivers a little.

Amanda notices. She picks up the throw blanket from the deck chair as she walks towards Angela, setting her mug down on the railing and wrapping the blanket around Angela's shoulders.

"Whatcha doing out here?" Amanda asks.

"Wondering how long it would take Shayne to find his way home if we blindfolded and dropped him off in the middle of the forest."

"What the hell?"

"He's a fan of Alone," Angela shrugs playfully.

"You're crazy," Amanda laughs.

Angela motions to the drink, "Hot cocoa?"

"With Baileys," she winks, "Tommy's making them."

Angela, still a little lost in thought, doesn’t respond, opting instead to envelop them in a comfortable silence. They both gaze out at the snowy landscape and stars twinkling up above. Angela can never see them from her apartment in Los Angeles; the light pollution always clouds her view. But out here, with Amanda standing next to her, everything is clear.

Whenever Amanda's by her side, something seems to shift in Angela. It's like Amanda's got this knack for quieting the chaos in her head. Everything, even the most tangled of thoughts, fall into place. She desperately wants to cling onto this peace, onto Amanda.

She wonders if she loves Amanda.

The idea shocks her a moment before she scoffs at it mentally. Of course she loves Amanda—she loves all her friends. She tells Arasha “I love you” when she hugs her before leaving the office, Chanse when he’s got her back, Courtney when they bring her food, and teases Shayne for chuckling uncomfortably when she tells him.

Yet, the longer she thinks about it, the more unsure she gets about grouping Amanda in with the rest of her friends. The more she realizes it’s different with Amanda. She doesn’t quite have the words to describe it, but she just knows. With every fit of uncontrollable laughter that’s got her falling into Amanda’s side, every glance exchanged while filming, and every burning touch, she just knows.

And then it clicks for Angela. It’s the thought of letting Smosh go, of letting Amanda go, that’s been scaring the living crap out of her.

Stunned by this sudden realization, she watches intently as Amanda sips her cocoa, who catches her staring and offers her a drink as well.

"Angela?"

"Hm?"

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah, just thinking."

"About what?"

"Just stuff. Life stuff, you know?"

Amanda raises an eyebrow, concerned. "You seem a little off. Something on your mind?"

Angela hesitates. Once again, she can feel the words threatening to spill out of her. But this time, she doesn’t fight the urge. She wants to tell Amanda, wants her to tell her everything is going to be okay. That they’re going to be okay. She feels the alcohol start warm her system and takes a deep breath in, then out.

“Can I tell you something?”

“Of course, baby.”

"No one else knows this yet, but I…booked a movie," she glances down at her hands, fidgeting with her fingers.

Amanda gasps, her eyes widening in surprise and excitement. She nudges Angela with her shoulder, "Oh, my god! Congratulations, angel!"

"Thanks, Amanda."

"Am I allowed to know what project it is, or is it a Marvel-level secret?"

Angela still doesn't meet Amanda's eyes, "Um, it's, uh, an indie film that A24’s looking to produce."

"Holy. Shit. That's fucking insane! This is huge, Angela. I'm so proud of you!" Amanda wraps an arm around her friend to pull her in closer, but pauses when she feels her stiffen in her embrace.

"Alright, something’s up,” Amanda faces her and, with a bit more seriousness and concern, asks, “Is there something in the script that makes you uncomfortable? Because if so, you should go and talk to-.”

Angela cuts her off, “No, there’s not. Don’t worry.”

Amanda’s relieved, though she sees Angela still has a strange faraway look on her face, “Then why do you not seem happy about this role?”

"No, I'm…I'm happy about it," Angela sighs heavily and finally looks up, only to be met with Amanda's unconvinced expression, "I swear I am. It's just that…I'm leaving Smosh soon."

"I get it, you hate working with us," Amanda jokes.

Immediately backtracking, Angela quickly mutters, "No! It's not like that, I didn't mean it like that."

"Chill, Ang. I'm just messing with you," Amanda laughs at Angela smacking her arm.

“Shut up, I’m trying to be vulnerable right now.”

Amanda gestures for her to continue, her face softening in apology.

"There's a tiny part of me who wants to turn down the role, but that would be such a stupid move—I know I would regret it instantly. But every time I think about doing this movie, a wave of panic washes over me and I become paralyzed with dread.”

Amanda places her hand on Angela's back, rubbing huge circles to help soothe her, "It's okay to be scared. Change is just one of those experiences that never gets easier."

"No, it’s not that. It’s just-,” her voice gets smaller, “Amanda, promise me we'll stay in touch."

"Duh, Ang. It’s not like you'll never see us again. You'll probably get upgraded to Mari and Sarah status, always welcome to drop by and say 'hello.' Maybe even join us in a video or two if your busy new schedule will allow it."

“Things it won't be the same."

Amanda acquiesces, "No, it won't. But that doesn’t have to be a bad thing."

"I mean it, Amanda. I don’t want us to become those friends who never speak to each other after they stop working together. I don’t want to see your life through Instagram posts. You mean the world to me," Angela's voice cracks slightly, the tone of it so raw that it breaks Amanda’s heart.

Amanda reaches out and pulls Angela into a tight hug, "I promise you, Angela. Even when you’re super famous and walking down the Oscars red carpet, I’ll break in and chase you down just to tell you fart joke.

“You’re dumb,” Angela rolls her eyes, but sinks into her embrace and smiles.

“But I mean it. I love you endlessly, and I will always be here with you.”

Maybe this is what love truly is. Letting go when you want to hold on. Knowing that it’ll always return.

[vanillaxoshi]

WHERE IS THIS FROM CUZ ITS SO SILLY LIKE LOOK AT DURI AND SOLAR JUST MARCHING IN SYNC

THEN YOU HAVE HALI JOINING THEM, the older brother joins the cute silliness of the two youngests❤️❤️

I know their memory is deteriorating but let me see this as just silly brother fun

Also SOLAR FALLING i see people making fun of it ngl i cant help but laugh at all of it

WHY DOES HE LOOK LIKE THAT hes like preaching something landscape and spinning

Saw someone put an audio of saleh on him

IT FIIIIITSSSSS

And i was so fed, bro was sassy, with his poses and him just failing so hard. This is what i asked for and i got it.

He was cringefailure, babygirl, girlypop, loser, nerd

The way duri and solar fight

Like its so cuteee

Photosynthesis duo my beloved🙌🥰

[mrs-monaghan]

Can we talk about the own it practice video and the….situation jm was dealing with cause…that is extremely sus and i feel like jkkrs don’t talk about this enough

Before we proceed Anon. I just wanna say I love when JK wears green. It's honestly such a good colour on him. He needs to do it more often. The green here worked perfectly 👌🏽 for him

Now that we have established JK looks amazing in green 👆🏽 i just want to say that no, own it dance practise is not underrated at all. It only seems like it because one half of Jikookers are prudes and the other half doesn't want to be accused of sexualising the members.

Now me? Me? IDGAF. Some random person on the Internet doesn't pay my rent and doesn't buy my alcohol. Until that starts happening, I could give 2 shits about what people on tumblr think about me.

(For those who didn't know, u don't need an analysis. Not for this. Just go to the OG video from BH, put your phone on landscape, zoom in and you're good to go. You don’t need me to clip or give u a timestamp. Jimin is hard throughout)

So yes, anon. Let's talk about the fact that Jimin had a full blown erection during the own it dance practice. Shit. Idek why people are afraid to talk about this. Here are the facts.

a) They didn't have to post this

b) They could have edited it in a way we didn't see it

c) They could have taken care of Jimin's hard on in between takes but chose not to. Instead Jimin changed into a different, longer red shirt to try and cover it up.

Like why not take care of the problem? Are they edgers? Why leave it there for everyone to see? Sounds familiar? Hickeygate anyone???

Jikook were dancing by themselves, in a dark room to a sexy song and so the Jimcock was acting up. Why shouldn't I talk about it? If they didn’t want me to talk about it, they wouldn't have uploaded it. Go to YT and watch that thing. Jimin knew he was hard. JK saw Jimin was hard, the video has multiple cuts and yet.... and yet... they didn't care.

Bro

JIKOOK IS REAL.

Drink up!

[wachtelspinat]

I've been in a rut as of late, and I really want to get better at form and anatomy. Your style is one of my favorite ones ever, what would you say were your biggest inspirations throughout the years?

hey, first of all i’m so very sorry for the late reply. hope you get to see this still since it’s been a while since you sent this ask... sorry

secondly, thanks a lot! i try to give some insights here, this question's always kinda hard for me to tackle because i'm having a hard time identifying my style and what makes it tick, idk... i guess it's a combination out of everything i like, starting from the artstyle of tf2 to various styles of my mutuals and people around here (but i think tf2, wanting to draw humans ever since i first laid eyes on tf2 and the cartoony artstyle of it all are my major fuels, ngl). 

as for anatomy and form: this is a matter i just recently pushed myself into because i felt really stuck in my ways. like... i never really did studies in my life, so when i wanted to draw i kind of had to count on it to ‘just work’, idk if this makes sense... i always felt like i didn’t actually know what i was doing there, and i worked with ref a lot (i would always recommend using ref, no matter what, what i want to say is that i realized i had not enough fundament to truly fool around in the way i liked to). and now that i started actually doing anatomy studies i feel so dumb because yeah. it IS making things easier x) i understand tho that for most it’s a motivational issue... you have to find a way to make it work for you. like doing studies, but implementing what you learned into a sketch of your blorbo, as an example.

as for resources, it’s hard to find good tutorials, mostly because the place is flooded with art bros trying to tell you “you don’t NEED anatomy and here is why” and then they make a sketch and you can SEE that they put SO MUCH ANATOMICAL KNOWLEDGE INTO IT. so there’s a lot of bs out there. there is good stuff out there tho, but it might take you a while to find what’s best suited for you. i could make a list of yt channels that really helped me but the thing is, everyone is at their own lvl and with different goals in mind, so i don’t think this would be very helpful.

what i can link you to tho are 2 videos that really opened my eyes in regards of a) finding your style and b) getting better at drawing a certain topic.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SLfH9yOGs3o - this video tackles the whole ‘finding your style’ topic. because i often give the tip that you don’t find your style, style finds you (and i still think that is in its regards correct, because you just get subconsciously influenced by the media you consume and like and your fave artists’ style’s if you really dig them) but the ability to actively WORK on your style is there. it’s just something you have to put a lot of work into. but we’ll never stop learning, so there’s that. (she describes it with her landscape drawings but really this works for anything... from dynamic linework to just trying to find the right energy in your pictures)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k0ufz75UvHs - this one really helped me getting over my fear of ‘drawing something ugly’ (big words from someone drawing ugly men as a hobby) but hear me out... because i have a weird brain that makes me recoil from something my mind thinks is ‘imperfect’ i really often get stuck with my art and either don’t experiment at all or get stuck with a sketch and spending hours on it trying to fix it... so approaching this matter like the video described just... melted that away. because when you draw 20 faces a day just telling yourself “NOBODY will EVER see this” you start loosening up... or at least i did. it’s also good for an analytical brain or people who strongly lean into that. this approach was especially nice while being stuck in an artblock... because i could easily just fool around and it kind of changed how i see doing art... like... nothing is ever perfect so i don’t have to make it perfect, i can analyze my art through a more neutral lense than my emotional attachment to it now... does that make sense?

last but not least, there are a ton of good resources out there for anatomical studies, my fave is still “anatomy for sculptors, understanding the human figure” by uldis zarins sandis kondrats.

SORRY THIS GOT A BIT LONGER BUT i put A LOT of thought into this as of late so yeah... maybe it’s gonna help someone too

[puffyducks]

DCRC Week #15

Guys pretend this post isn't slightly late I've had a reeeally long week making those fashion drawings and renovating my entire bedroom. Anyways it's time for PKNA #11: Urk everyone say Hi Urk cause we're gonna see him in a second!

(extra long and image heavy post warning)

I'm gonna be so fr I have a huge headache right now and there's a big crew of people redoing the carpet in my house and making really loud banging sounds. I can't take a nap because my entire bed has been deconstructed and my mattress is standing up against a wall. I'm hiding in the room we shoved all our things into and I have like 4 feet of living space total right now. I'm saying this as a disclaimer because I'm probably gonna be even less coherent than usual (somehow) but hopefully hearing the insane ramblings of a tired Puffy will only enhance the experience.

And here in the horrors of the duck universe we have a regular human man sitting next to a flesh-colored dog-nosed creature. Guys seriously why are all the dog people in the duckverse always skin colored like would it kill them to put in some variety... like some different dog breeds... nevermind the fact that 99% of the ducks are all pekins. I'M JUST SAYING. As a furry I think we need to ask for better. And by better I mean just make a poodle character or something idk change it up a bit

Ok not to immediately drag on with the same topic but this might be one of the scariest designs I've ever seen idk what it is about this weirdly big-armed dog man but I'm so viscerally uncomfortable looking at him. Like it's not just me right. He's scary.

Why is donald just flashing his ass at uno in this panel. mf YOU do something??

Bro is really just pointing to the tree like :0

Gay ass look. Why did they exchange glances like this.

Haha don't worry Donald we put the Raider away in jail and he totally can't escape now. Not like he did the first time anyways.

Hi Urk. No other commentary I just like this panel.

HE FUCKING KILLED LYLAAAAAwhy is her hand flesh colored in the last panel

I like that Lyla hitting the ground makes a TLANG sound cause she's made of metal

idk why it's so amusing to me but Urk just calling PK a "total buzz kill" is so like. like to me it's the equivalent of "get lost DUDE you're harshing my vibe MAN" do you get me

Alright. Listen. We're gonna have to address the elephant in the room here (or the elephant-sized duck anyways). Urk is a Native American, specifically meant to be a member of the real life Iroquois tribe. I am not Native American, nor am I particularly knowledgeable on the culture of any specific tribes, so I'm not going to pretend to be an expert here, but just so we're clear: referring to any member of America's native population as being "red" is generally a big no-no.

Urk is meant to come from a dimension with an alternative form of history, one where North America was never colonized and continued to develop under the rule of the many native tribes that once dotted the landscape (one that also got super advanced because of aliens or something but that bit is honestly not that important). Could this concept of an alternate history be an interesting one to explore in a DIFFERENT piece of media? Perhaps. Does this Italian-made Donald Duck comic do a particularly good job of handling the cultural representations here?... eh.

Again, this was made overseas, it's the 90s, representation in media wasn't exactly great back then. I've certainly seen a lot worse *cough* Darkwing Duck *wheeze* but I think there are aspects surrounding Urk's lore that could certainly be better as well. Like I said, I'm not a Native American, I'm not going to pretend I'm an expert on this topic, nor am I going to say anything in here is downright offensive (I don't think I have the right to do so) but I think it's a point that's worth bringing up because it's kind of hard to ignore when reading Urk-related stories (which there are a few of because he sticks around after this comic).

ANYWAYS with all that said. Back to saying stupid shit

UMMM I DUNNO ABOUT THAT ONE BRO

First of all, haha oops the Raider accidentally pulled this poor random guy into our dimension. SECOND OF ALL, I've seen multiple pieces of media now insist that the Raider is some kind of "predatory bird" like a hawk or an eagle but I REFUSE to believe this information. SORRY but he is a rooster and I am always going to see him as a rooster, I DON'T CARE WHAT CANON MEDIA SAYS!!! MF SAID "BUKHAWHAW" IN THE OFFICIAL ENGLISH DON'T THINK I FORGOT THAT!!! THAT'S A CHICKEN!!!!!

Lyla looks cute here hi Lyla

OK SHOUTOUT TO URK JUST SMASHING A WHOLE CAR WITH HIS BIG FUCKING FISTS. HOW DID HE DO THAT

Billy ain't ever gonna forget this for the rest of his life dawg 💀 have fun unpacking this one in therapy

how did the fucking creature develop racism oh my god

WHAT DID LYLA EVEN DO WRONG THIS TIME?? FUCK YOU TIME POLICE free my girl

Everyone say "Hi Urk" again because we're stuck with Urk now

Kinda thought PK was flipping a middle finger here for a split second

Ok Fangus Tales now. Say it with me "we love Fangus Tales" yayyy

what the fuck

yeah actually you know what of COURSE Angus hates dogs. he actually sucks so bad you guys

let him fallll I mean WOAH who said that

YEAH OK OF COURSE ANGUS PARTICIPATES IN ILLEGAL DOG RACING

Dog you have very poor taste in people I'm begging you to like anyone other than Angus Fangus

Ok that's it see you next week and by next week I mean probably within the next 24 hours because I really like the next comic

[arquimidna]

Mario and Luigi in Wondershroom As kids Mario and Luigi had a hard time to adapting to their new life. Being away from the country they were born in and then being in a place that doesn't even speak your native language or has any similarities in landscapes is terrifying. They only have each other as company, nobody else. And they don't need anyone at all, or so they think. That's why they ended up in this predicament: Their parents were invited to a party for making new contacts, acquaintances, and so on; they had to go as well. The hosts' and rest of the guests' children didn't include them in their games, instead they treated them badly and mocked the way they talked, because of that they left the party. They were wandering around the neighborhood alone until they found a fungi like creature: red head with white polka dots and long ears like a rabbit, wearing a blue vest. The creature was crying that he would be late for something. Mario was very curious about him and wanted to help him, so he grabbed his twin brother's hand to follow him together. The moment they lost track of him was when the fungi creature entered a green metal pipe...

----- Just a silly idea I had for the Super Mario Universe. Mario and Luigi being first generation of Italian-Americans (headcanon) and having their childhood in the late 60's (Cuz if Mario and Luigi were 25 in the first Super Mario Bros. - 1985 - they should've been born in 1960. So I thought it would be fun to represent that side of their ageless characterization) Enjoy~

[getgotperidot]

Zote and Gorb Go on a Trip

Summary: Zote and Gorb finish packing and embark on their trip. Zote is grumpy. Gorb is Gorb.

Note: I've recently been replaying Hollow Knight, and Zote and Gorb are some of my favorite characters. I wanted to write a random fic about them. Don't question anything.

************************************************************************

Zote the Mighty picked up his trusty nail. The nail was named Life Ender, for it would someday end many lives. But that day was not today. 

Zote's manly brow furrowed in concentration. He tightened his grip on his nail and slowly edged along the perimeter of the room. The journey ahead could not begin without all of his trusty supplies. So where had he put his purple polka dotted socks?

Those socks were a faithful companion on all of his Quests. Without them, he would surely fall to even the most pathetic of enemies. And Zote the Mighty had many enemies. 

A foreboding thought struck him. Were his faithful socks in the laundry? Zote frantically gallantly galloped over to his laundry bin. Sure enough, right at the top of the pile was his socks. 

Zote fell to his knees dramatically. He cursed the heavens. Gorb would be there soon, and there was no time to start a new laundry load. Why did the universe hate him so?

A faint warbling noise sounded at the door. Zote rose to his feet and trudged confidently to answer it. 

The entrance swung open. "I AM GORB, " said Gorb.

"Yeah, yeah," grumbled Zote, "We have more important things to worry about. Like my socks."

"I am Gorb?" asked Gorb.

"Of course I wear socks!" Zote bellowed, "I have feet!"

Gorb wiggled skeptically, and shot a pointed glance at the stumps of Zote's legs. Zote's didn't seem to notice. 

Zote sighed. "It's hard being the most powerful bug in Hallownest," He growled solemnly, stroking his nonexistent beard.

"I am Gorb," Gorb replied wisely.

"Bah, no matter," Zote harrumphed, "A great man without his favorite socks is still a great man. Are you ready to go?"

Gorb faltered momentarily at the weight of Zote's knowledge. After regaining their composure, Gorb gave an affirmative, "I am Gorb" and held up their My Little Pony suitcase.

Zote went to go fetch his own Transformers one, and to say goodbye to his girlfriend Bretta.

"Bye, Bretta," he said in a gruff manner, not showing too much emotion as a staple to his manliness.

Bretta was staring dreamily at a photo of some weakling vessel. "Did you say something?" She asked seductively. 

"I'm leaving," said Zote, flexing his many muscles, "Don't miss me too much." 

Bretta rolled her eyes. "I won't. Take your time coming back." She planted a kiss on the vessel's picture and waved Zote away. Zote left the room with swagger, confident in his relationship with his beautiful girlfriend. 

"It's just a shame she's so clingy," he muttered to himself. "A man like me doesn't have a lot of free time to spend with his loved ones."

Gorb warbled from the other room. "I'm coming, I'm coming," Zote huffed. Zote sauntered past Gorb and out the door. Gorb wiggled along behind him. 

The two bros ventured across the landscape, occasionally stopping as Zote tripped over rocks took time to inspect the dirt. It was a very impactful journey. 

In the end they disappeared into the sunset. Except they were underground so there was no sun. They just kept walking until the camera was too far away to see them.

The bros returned to Dirtmouth the next day, much to Bretta's displeasure. 

THE END :D

[djonrecovery]

Yo my name is David but i go by DJ. I’m 25 years old from Florida and im here to put my story out there ion know why but I know my girl does social media but ion want her to know im on the social media trend yet now lol. I haven’t had a lot of family in my life that ever wanted me around ya know? I was kicked out and thrown to the streets when I was young and i started picking up drugs forreal and doing every drug I could to mend my pain and to not be angry in life. I kept fuckin up and dropped outta school and started hangin at trap houses with my former friends who are nothing to me now forreal. When I was 21 I went to county jail and fought charges till I was 22. I then got sentenced to Florida state prison for 3 years. I am not proud of it at all man im not. I just turned 25 on the 3rd. I have been out since January 26th. My dad passed away randomly December 19th 2022 in a house fire. Im doin aight I was still locked up so my fam took care of it while I was down still. I came home to nothing and nobody to welcome me home. Shit was hard on me and I hated life and I was down on my luck and had nothing going for me yet. The state of Florida gave me a life insurance check and I was able to get a place of my own now so im trying to work my way back up forreal. I have been clean off of narcotics for a long time now and I do not want to go back to that lifestyle. That lifestyle is for the birds and it aint cool forreal. Im not proud to say that I went to prison at 22 and it aint nothing to brag on forreal I aint trying to do that at all but I wanted to write this and let people know that lifestyle is for the birds and anyone who thinks slangin drugs and thinkin you a gangster like i used to think about myself.. man that shit aint cool and I lost my dad while I was gone bro. I have lost so many friends to drug overdoses while I was gone and I came home to nothing but im building my life back up and I am building my reputation back up to a positive note and changing myself for those that love and to make my dad proud of me. I also have a beautiful girlfriend who I want to make proud of me and I hate that I have made her cry before because she missed me overtime and wanted me to come home. She the strongest woman I know and I am proud of her forreal she is a soldier and I love her to death bruh. I want to use this time to say that narcotics aint cool. Breaking the law aint cool bruh. I thought I was a gangster.. I thought I was cool as hell. I was robbing my friends for drugs so I could get high and ignore my problems and not do shit for myself. Im doing better now and I am sober to this day since I got out of prison January 26th 2023. I have goals I want to accomplish and set and strive for. I want to marry my girlfriend and buy her a ring and make sure she has a dress and that I can make her happy and make my dad proud of me and my family proud of me. I am working right now doing landscaping and construction jobs with 2 of my buddies and striving for me and my girl and making my dad proud of me today. If you think the drug life is cool.. man you aint cool. Losing friends to overdosing aint cool. We in 2023 now.. I have lost 4 years of my life to the drug life, trying to be a gangster, being cold, not caring, all that shit. For what? I don’t even know anymore. But that shit is behind me now and im grown and trying to be someone now and motivate others and finally come on social media with my story. I didn’t want people thinking I was bragging on going to prison or my past at all forreal. Not the point of this but to be able to share my story and my recovery with random strangers lol but to show people man you can beat the odds like I am. I want to be able to share my story with others and show them that bro- there is more to life than that and there’s more on the other side of life now. I want to help others now and show them I changed and inspire others. Not all of us who have to been to jail or prison are bad people. Some of us do change and come back to society as good people.

If anyone out there in the world wants to help donate anything to me for my journey and my goals and things I want to strive for.. bruh let me know. With my dad being gone im on my own and I ain’t got nobody else to help me out so I sit at my house with my babygirl and it’s just us ya know? I miss my pops a lot forreal so if you wanna help me out to surprise my girlfriend and to help me to become a more changed person to society for the better..

Cashapp

* I want to spoil my girlfriend and marry her eventually. I need to get her her ring soon

* bills

* More food in the house

* Electricity bills

* Being able to support myself and my girlfriend

* I want to spoil my girl and make up for lost time that I feel like I owe her

[deakyjoe]

Episode 6 tlou spoilers ahead

My thoughts and favourite moments throughout the episode:

WHY DID WE HAVE TO START THE EPISODE THERE??

Oop three months goddamn

BRO IS THAT HARRY CLEARWATER FROM TWILIGHT

“Little psycho” 💀

The classic Pedro Pascal puppy dog eyes making an appearance

Ellie is so fucking funny

Panic attack???????

Joel gives in so easily

Crying over their conversation over the fire

Ellie doing second watch when Joel fell asleep 🥹🥹

Joel standing up like an old man (details!!)

Joel not understanding science again 🫶

ELLIE AND THE DOG

Tommy and Joel reuniting had me sobbing

“Oh, shit. Congrats! Joel say congrats.” “Congrats 😐.”

Gabriel Luna is fine as hell

Me: ah, communism Joel: so uh, communism Me: see??

OH DON’T MENTION TESS

OH HE LIED ABOUT TESS

OH HE’S LYING ABOUT ELLIE TOO

Interesting…

“I guess we’ll find out.” Killed me

Damn that went sour so easily

Not these people out here looking like SARAH

A MENSTRUAL CUP

I love this show for acknowledging that people still have periods during an apocalypse

What’s that… oh

Feeling sad over Sarah again… and poor Kevin

Messy ass haircut

Joel confessing to Tommy!!

“She’s immune.” Hit hard, I don’t know why

“It was her dyin’ wish. What the hell else was I supposed to do?”

“I was so afraid.” SCREAMING

The whole fear monologue from Joel actually. Pedro Pascal ACTING HIS HEART OUT

Crying along with Pedro right here

Learn to knock Joel 🙄

Ellie reading the old diary

“I’m not her, y’know?” Oop

YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT LOSS IS

The whole fucking interaction really

“You’re right. You’re not my daughter. And I sure as hell ain’t your dad.” I hate Joel.

Christmas tree… oh- OH

SARAH!!

Ellie leaving thinking she’s not getting a goodbye

Joel being in the stables

Ellie choosing Joel

“Adios, big brother.” Violently crying.

Joel teaching Ellie to shoot

“You gonna shoot this thing or get it pregnant?” She’s too funny

The landscape and cinematography are gorgeous

Ellie resting against Joel’s back

The fucking jokes about sheep 😭

A singer. He wanted to be a singer.

I WANNA HEAR PEDRO PASCAL SING AS JOEL

They really do have bad luck when it comes to the fireflies

TURNED THEM INTO MONKEYS

Oh shit

Damn he broke his neck

OH SHIT

OH FUCK

Why would he do that 😭 now bro’s bleeding out

ELLIE SHOOTING AT THEM

Joel’s looking a little pale and sickly

I laughed when he fell off the horse. Sorry.

“I can’t fucking do this without you.” My feelings are hurt

Ellie crying?? Goddamn

Depeche Mode!!

The shaky “Please. Joel, please.” OUCH

The Depeche Mode cover!!

Ayo the end??

I gotta wait another week now??

Ah, fuck ☹️

[pinkseas]

[parasocial bestie] boutta send another ask before you can answer the previous ones.... bro girl (gnc) do you ever think about xiao post-teyvat... after lumine leaves..... like ive took an entire night just hours laying on bed once just to rot my brain on what's gonna happen after all that stuff i told u abt his ideal endinfg and shit i dont remember hhUEHAHAHAHGH BUT LIKE, THE CORE OF IT ALL that he learns and remembers lumine's words to heart; and there's the extra bit i said perhaps, on that time he won't have someone who had made his life a little better, no longer by his side, he would try to delve in a curiosity he had thrown away before. the desire to seek something new, something he used to have, put aside in priority for duty, and that he's not meant to indulge things like other living things do.

i love the thought that xiao takes the step of being in lumine's shoes, not entirely, but the mere concept of being a traveler. a wanderer. someone who's simply curious, who wants to explore what they've never seen. this is a life lumine is at her finest, other than the responsibilities she's weighed to. xiao would just want to Try and feel her experience. he'd leave liyue if only for a few days, still clinging to the thought of,... home? liyue finally felt like home than a place he's obligated to protect. and that's thanks to lumine too. his travels progress with ease with his own form of teleportation through the permit of wind, and he settles to visit,.. places. landscapes, nature,- to meet the people can wait later. for now, he's only here to explore and just... be.

it latches at the very center of my brain for weeks about post-traveler concepts like this like i DONT dig and do not like just outright Despise a xiao that misses lumine to the Extreme, someone to cling onto, because it defeats the purpose of him who's meant to be free and being able to choose. it doesnt mean anything about him forming attachments and loyalty, although hes still loyal to lumine in regards he sees her as a dear friend who taught him so much about life, the life he has and that he should cherish it. and he does, and will try, with all these little steps of moving forward without the hand that pulls you along. the people who cared for him who had been the hand that pushes along, will still push, but now all of his actions are made on his own volition. i just love that. i love that after lumine, he starts to live again. he slowly, but surely, know how to live.

so first of all "bro girl (gnc)" fucking SENT me im gonna cry why is that so funny to me i love that so bad

and second of all okay ngl i dont think about it OFTEN but i do. think about it. i Absolutely Do Think About It. and the way you've described it is flawless i have nothing to expand upon nothing to add no little comment to make im just. speechless. delving into the curiosity he had thrown away before. becoming a traveler, a wanderer. meeting people coming later, for now focusing on exploring, on seeing all that the world has to offer. still regarding lumine as such a dear friend. his actions being his own. learning how to live again. im going to lose my MINDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD.

not getting too close to mortals at least for a while at first, too wary of the pain he's caused them before, too aware of the degree to which he will outlive them (those from the chasm are exceptions, and he'll remember them for centuries after they're gone, even if only in fleeting thoughts). but meeting some of the other archons. becoming closer with other adepti. a small circle, but a circle nonetheless. <- cannot stop thinking about xiao and nahida eventually becoming friends dorry i had to say SOMETHING. its hard to imagine him and the wanderer as Friend friends, but i can see them crossing paths sometimes if they hadn't already met through lumine, realizing fairly early on that neither of them are human, working together pretty well whether in fighting or simple exploration. sharing a sort of wonder at the world, a deep will to be better, knowing what its like to exist solely for one purpose and knowing more still of what it's like for that purpose to leave them, to be taught how to exist without it, to further learn themselves how to exist without it. idk. very different people but a solid few similarities in their lives. xiao albedo friendship i hope i pray at least eventually idk i think they'd just Vibe.

still thinking about xiao and nahida as friends. xiao knowing a lot about various plant life and taking care of it, nahida teaching him the rest and filling in the gaps when he asks. learning how to sew. learning how to best care for the wildlife. learning how to use his hands gently. they're rough and calloused and for so long they existed to wield his weapon, nothing more, but now they make messy stitches and pat down the dirt around freshly planted flowers and ever so carefully pet the stray cats he sees in different cities. xiao is not a weapon. maybe he never was.

idont even know where my train of thought is anymore im just. im just. im just. o(-(