#brb i need to drop out so i can have time to write these

[lovelyhan]

kai kai hear me out: hhu + pets series 🥺🙏

i know thats a lot to ask but since you already have a fic for mingyu and u have nice ideas for scoups and kkuma, what more if you invite the rest of hhu to the party too 🤭🤭

definitely not me wanting to see how you'll write wonu and vern with animals DEF NOT

i just let out the LOUDEST screech ur brain is so big anon!!!!! im legit going to consider this wait 😭

[bratshaws]

through the hourglass 341. brb x oc

a/n: i love writing dad!rooster (comments and reblogs are super welcome and encouraged!)

pairing: plus size!oc x rooster

warnings: none uwu

goodness gracious (pls read this one to know more what this fic is about!!)

chapter

1/

/316/317/318/319/320/321/322/323/324/325/326/327/328/329/330/331/332/333/334/335/336/337/338/339/340

(pls let me know if you want to be added to the taglist! )

taglist: @mirandastuckinthe80s @roosterschanelslut @wiipes @lcahwriter @novastories @gretagerwigsmuse @frenchtoastix @lizzie-rdj @fanboyluvr @atarmychick007 @comebacktoearthpls

@peachiicherries @mak-32 @lizziespidiepridie @roosterswifey @ollyoxenfrees @piceous21 @sqrlgrl22 @hofficoffi @lexhalstead3 @lorilane33 @legendarydreamersharkparty @luckyladycreator2

@emilybradshaw @louisahale @leobabbyyy @booklover2sblog @winter-run @ktjmac @graciereads @bigpoppajes @taytaylala12

@caitsymichelle13 @becks-things @caatheeriinee07 @fanboyswhore9 @jesfreedark @katiemcrae @lilmonstrjedi @hobiismyhopeu @teacupsandtopgun @insominac23 @gh0stsgoodgirl @mygyn @chavivaelisheva @kmc1989 @enchantingharmonyalpaca @callsign-magnolia @mrsbradshaw01

-

When she told Rooster about it, he was very excited. He couldn’t help but ask if she planned on wearing those shorts again, with his eyes dropping down her body appreciatively.

 She has to clear her throat, because they were still at Evelyn’s when he does that, “Anyway,” she purses her lips, sitting next to him on the couch, settling Aurora on top of her chest while he holds Gavin, Nicole happily sitting on the floor between her parents, playing with Wiley, “It’ll be next saturday. I can talk to Penny, she’ll let me go by then.”

Rooster's eyes lingered on Beatrice as she settled Aurora on her chest, his playful grin not fading even as she cleared her throat to redirect his attention. "Those shorts were something else, you know," he teased, quietly  "But seriously, I can't wait to see you in action."

Beatrice chuckled, giving him a playful nudge. "You just want an excuse to see me in those shorts again, don't you?"

He winked, his eyes dancing with pure adoration. "Can you blame me? Besides, it's been a while since we've seen you on the court. It's going to be a blast."

“Four years to be exact.” she smiles, “Doesn’t seem that long,damn.”

“You tell me,’ Jake mutters, “I’m still sore from you guys’ beating us– Rooster doesn’t count, he was in the team but he just was busy looking at you.” and Rooster didn’t look guilty at all by that accusation.

“Well, the game made it possible for you to get closer to Ev,Jake…wasn’t all bad,right?” Bea smiles, “You got together and you have little JJ now.”

Rooster chuckled, his arm wrapping around Beatrice as they settled into the cozy living room. "Yeah, Jake, you can thank our game for bringing you and Evelyn together. It was all part of the master plan."

Jake rolled his eyes in mock annoyance, but the smile on his face betrayed his amusement. "Well, I suppose I can forgive the sore muscles then. It all worked out in the end." he looks down at the sleeping baby before Evelyn sits next to him.

“So,” she begins, “We need a schedule because of the kids, all the girls said yes so we’re good.”

“Well,” Bea looks at Rooster, ‘Nikki and the twins nap at 9, then after lunch and then they stay up until dinner time, to fall asleep soon after…so…maybe ten o’clock is good?”

“Ten o’clock is around the time JJ wants to have a snack, so we should try something a bit later.”

Rooster only watched the interaction, flicking his eyes back and forth, then he parted his lips, “You know,we can take care of the kids no problem.” he suggests, seeing that the two women weren’t going to find a fitting timeline, “I mean,I can,I’m sure Jake can handle JJ too.” his friend just nodded in response.

Beatrice pursed her lips, “Roos…well, it’s just…last time you did this it was only Nikki…”

Rooster grinned, remembering the last time he took care of Nikki when she was the only child but hey, he could multitask. "Come on, Bea. I can handle it. They aren’t hard to work with, the twins are still months old and Nikki-." Nicole babbles happily, “Is Nikki. I can do this.”

Beatrice furrowed her brows, then rubbed her neck, “I’d take the offer,Bea.” Evelyn says, “We won’t have time otherwise.”

Beatrice sighed, looking at Rooster with hesitation. "Alright,” she sighs out,”...if you're sure you can handle it. Then alright."

Rooster chuckled, giving her hand a reassuring squeeze. "Trust me, it'll be a piece of cake. We'll have everything under control." he winks, “You’ll see.”

Evelyn smiled, looking from Rooster to Jake, cupping the Texan’s cheek. "Thanks, guys. It means a lot. With the game and all, we really need this time." she says, “You’ll be able to take Bea there too if need be,Rooster?”

"Consider it done," Rooster replied, "It’ll be easy, piece of cake like I said.” he could see in Beatrice’s eyes how much the idea of going back to Northride made her excited…and nervous and honestly he just wanted to help however he could, “You guys will be able to train without worries.”

“Maybe we can try to start around ten-thirty,Ev?”

Jake nodded in agreement. looking at Evelyn for confirmation. "Sounds good to me. JJ usually settles down around ten, after all."

"Hmmm…alright," Evelyn said, "Ten-thirty it is. We can meet at the gym, get some warm-up, later, yeah?"

Beatrice glanced at Rooster, who winked at her again. "Sounds good.” she grins, “And I know it’ll be fun. It always is.” she says, rubbing his knuckles gently before she parts her lips, “Should we carpool together?”

“Carpooling works for me.” Evelyn says “As long Shells isn’t the one driving.”

“Well, then I guess it’s settled in.”

Evelyn chimed in, her eyes gleaming with excitement. "Perfect.” she smiles, “Then,” she begins, “I’ll see you saturday.”

-

“Are you sure you can handle it?”

Rooster looks up from his coffee towards Beatrice, sans shirt, wearing only his jeans as he leans on the counter. Damn he’s making it really hard to leave, ‘Yep. The kids will be okay, gorgeous, you’ll be gone for one hour.” he smiles, then lifts his arm, offering his side to her, “C’mere you.”

Beatrice couldn't help but smile as she walked over to him, her fingers grazing the bare skin of his arm as she snuggled into his side. His warmth enveloped her, and his chin was propped on top of her head.

"Are you sure?One hour might feel like an eternity without me around."

Rooster chuckled, his deep voice vibrating through his chest. "Hmmm…as tempting as it is to keep you here with me…I'll survive, gorgeous. Just promise you'll hurry back. I'll be waiting right here for you."

She rolled her eyes with a playful smirk. "Don't get too comfortable without me, big guy."

“Big guy?”

“Well, you are big aren't you?”

His mouth drops as he leans his head back,giving her a look, “...listen here you minx.” and she giggles, walking around him to get her water. She was already wearing the shorts and his face curled in pain “Ugghhh, can Evelyn wait fifteen minutes? At least? You look so fuckin’ good.”

Beatrice laughed, a melodic sound that filled the room. "Roos, you know I can't keep Evelyn waiting. Besides, I'll be back before you know it." She reached for her water bottle, taking a sip before wrapping her arms around his neck. "And you're the one who said one hour is nothing, right?"

Rooster bit his lower lip,cupping her hips, right where the elastic of her shorts dug a little bit deeper on the softer flesh there "Yeah…but fuck gorgeous...."

“If you are nice and handle everything like you plan,” her voice breathy, running her fingers up and down his nape, making him shudder, “I’ll use this outfit again…and not only for the game.”

His pupils enlarge immediately, “Bea.”

“Is that a yes or no Lc?”

Rooster's gaze held a mixture of desire and longing as he absorbed Beatrice's teasing words. He cleared his throat, trying to regain some composure, but the want in his eyes betrayed his thoughts. "Alright, you've got yourself a deal, gorgeous," he replied, his hands tightening on her hips. "But you better make it worth the wait."

She leaned in, her lips brushing against his earlobe as she whispered, "Oh, I intend to, Lc." another shudder and a quiet ‘fuuck’ left his lips, “Gotta go!” she pecks his lips twice, “Love you!”

With a playful wink, Beatrice extricated herself from Rooster's embrace and headed towards the door, leaving him momentarily dazed. He just leans back against the counter and rubs his face up and down. He has to focus, so he does, at Jolene who is sitting cutely next to him, her big pittie head tilted as the door closes and he hears Bea’s jeep leaving the driveway.

“...yeah,she’s still messing with me,Jojo.” he chuckles, scratching the dog’s head, he checks the baby monitor app and makes sure the kids are still asleep, which they are, before he moves forward - stepping over a sleeping Jack, the dog barely noticing him moving above him- and looks at the list of things he has to do.

Rooster took a deep breath, his eyes scanning the list of tasks for the babies, mentally organizing his plan of action. The sound of Jolene's content sigh beside him served as a reminder that he wasn't alone in there "Alright, Jojo, let's get this show on the road," he mumbled to the dog, who wagged her tail as if agreeing with him.

His first stop was the nursery, where the twins were still sound asleep in their cribs. Rooster approached with a gentle step, trying not to disturb their slumber. He checked their diapers, ensuring they were dry and comfortable.

They were.

Nice.

Once the twins were content and cooing in their cribs, Rooster moved on to Nicole's room. He opened the door cautiously, expecting to find her still immersed in dreamland. However, he was met with wide awake, curious eyes that greeted him with a bright smile.

Rooster chuckled, scooping her up in his arms. "Well, you are up already huh?” his daughter just blinked, then yawned, stretching her little arms up, “Gotta check the diaper kiddo, c’mere.”

Rooster settled Nicole on the changing table, her tiny fingers reaching for the colorful mobile hanging above. He smiled at her, his fingers expertly undoing the tapes of her diaper. As he worked, he couldn't help but marvel at how much she had grown since her arrival.

"Alright, Nikki," he cooed, "let's make sure you're all clean and comfy." He made quick work of the diaper change, replacing it with a fresh one before planting a soft kiss on her forehead. Nicole giggled, her laughter echoing in the room.

With Nicole content in her freshly changed diaper, Rooster looked down at the list while holding the toddler’s hand as she spun herself back and forth.

1.Check on the Twins

2. Diaper Change for the Twins

3. Prepare Nikki’s bottle

4. Prepare Bottles for the Twins

‘Well, they are still asleep so,” he picks Nicole up with ease, “Let’s prepare your breakfast.” Nicole babbled, touching his mustache and slapping her tiny hand over his lips - like she always did - “Ow, hey,birdie,come on, you are getting heavy handed already.”

Rooster balanced Nicole on his hip, her laughter echoing through the quiet house. With the morning sunlight streaming through the windows, he made his way to the kitchen, mentally ticking off the tasks on the list. Jolene trotted alongside them, her tail wagging with excitement.

In the kitchen, Rooster set Nicole in her high chair, the colorful tray adorned with a variety of toys to keep her entertained. He reached for the ingredients to prepare her breakfast, all the while keeping his phone handy.

As he mixed together oatmeal and mashed bananas, Nicole eagerly kicked her legs, babbling in her own delightful language. Rooster couldn't help but smile at the pure joy radiating from his daughter. “Yep, there’ll be food soon enough,baby girl.” he tastes it for good measure, “There you go.”

While Nicole enjoyed her breakfast, Rooster turned his attention to the next item on the list—preparing bottles for the twins. He knew he had time, but he liked being prepare- he stops, wincing when Eleanor’s deep barks echoed from the living room door, “Jesus,” he hurries over, “Ellie,Ellie,calm down.”

He sees someone out there, a male figure? And he frowns, looking back into the kitchen briefly to make sure Nikki was alright, then exhaling as he opened the door. He didn’t even bother ot put on a shirt.

The person looks up at him and he blinks “...can I help you?”

“...oh uh–” oh he’s one of Marcus’ assistants, “Delivery for you guys, Mr.Beverly wanted you to have it as…uh…fresh out of the oven.”

That was a huge box. ‘Oh,” he grabs it from his hand, “Thank you,I…” he clears his throat, pushing Eleanor back, “Thank you, can you thank him for me?” the kid nods and scurries away,disappearing from his view as he closes the door.

He stares down at the box, honestly, Marcus gave them so much stuff it was crazy. He was an amazing fashion designer but…his favoritism was obvious. But he’d check on that later, now he had to make sure Nikki was okay.

And she was, eating some of the oatmeal with her rubber spoon,looking back at her father as he walks in, “Well, aren’t you a polite little one.” he chuckles, sitting down close to her with his body relaxing, “Soon enough you won’t need my help for anything baby girl.”

Ouch. No, that hurt a lot to think about.

He chews the inside of his cheek, tapping his fingers on the table…he still had a few more days left from his leave, then he’d have the promotion ceremony. Was he nervous?

Yes.

He was.

Rooster focused on his daughter, the laughter and babbling providing a temporary distraction from the thoughts that lingered in the back of his mind. He continued to feed Nicole,the twins, were still asleep, giving Rooster a small window of time to manage the morning routineHe glanced at the clock, calculating how much time he had before the twins would wake up demanding their share of attention.

A little while.

Rooster sighed as he observed Nicole, a bittersweet smile playing on his lips. "Hey there, birdie," he murmured, reaching out to ruffle Nicole's soft hair. "You're growing up too fast, you know that?"

Nicole giggled, her chubby cheeks dimpling as she continued to explore her breakfast. Rooster's mind, however, drifted to the passage of time and the inevitability of change. The realization that his little girl was becoming more independent each day tugged at his heart.

She was outgrowing some of her older clothes, Beatrice saved some and donated others but…Nicole was just so big. He smiles, almost sadly, as he holds his head up with his hand, watching as she feeds herself.

He is proud of her, very proud. As Nicole happily banged her spoon against the high chair tray, Rooster's thoughts shifted to the unexpected delivery from Marcus. The large box sat in the corner of the kitchen, a big black package that Jack lazily sniffed.

Curiosity piqued, Rooster decided to investigate the contents of the box after ensuring Nicole was content and full. He gently scooped her up, cradling her against his chest. 

 Rooster approached the box. With a practiced motion, he pulled the ribbon that kept it closed, open. And then handed it to Nicole just so she could play with it as he looked down at it.Stylish outfits for the kids to luxurious items for Beatrice, and himself Marcus had spared no expense.

He then noticed something in the corner, something…paper? A calendar? He tilted his head, digging his hand deeper and pulling it out…it was their photoshoot. They finally got the pictures - honestly he almost forgot about it.

He looked down at it then gasped.

“Oh I gotta tell Bea.”

[croissantlover24]

Brb drabbling Hemic in your inbox

—————

You find yourself in an unfamiliar place, a woman with brownish red hair and piercing eyes sits uncaringly on a bean bag. She emits a slight purple glow, though you brush it off as your eyes tricking you again.

“Hello? Where um… am I?” You speak softly, almost too quiet to hear.

The woman scoffs, and turns to face you.

“Doesn’t matter, you’re new though, I have seen you around, what’s your name?”

You pause, searching for the right words. You don’t remember your name, and haven’t in a long time.

“I… don’t remember, I’m sorry”

She looks at you, amused.

“Alright, I’m going to call you nightingale, that work for you?”

You nod, it’ll work for now. She leans in and smiles at you, it looks slightly eerie.

“Alright, Nightingale, what do you remember?”

“Not a whole lot, but I remember that I’m not supposed to be here, this isn’t my home”

She hums, looking you up and down, you seem desperate enough to agree to a deal.

“Nightingale, I can get you home, and your memories back, I just need something from you in return..”

You lighten up a little at her words, and look up and into her eyes. They swirl, from black sclera and red pupils to a bright purple that sucks all the light out of the room.

You can’t look away.

“There you go, little birdie, just watch my eyes and sink deep into them for me, I’ll make it all better soon…”

You mumble something in agreement, your mouth feels thick, as though someone had mixed glue and molasses into a sticky drink in your mouth.

“You’re doing so well, just a little further and we’ll make you right at home”

You drop, mind emptying of any thoughts at all other than her. It feels so good…

“ ‘m all yours..” you mumble, falling forward.

She catches you and laughs, it would be sickening if you had the capability to feel that right now.

“Follow me, my dear, I’ll get you set up at home, alright?”

You try to thank her but the words blend together, she leads you into another room, where you’ll be staying from now on.

—————

Hope it wasn’t too OOC for her! I think a normal amount about getting hypnotised by her. What do you mean the normal amount is none?!

ASDFGHJKL IT’S MY GIRL AAAA

(It’s a little ooc but don’t worry! I always forget how to write her properly XD)

I love it so much!!! Thank you <333

[teddybeartoji]

hiiiiii to the handsomest man on tumblr!! ehehe i’m a bit nervous bc this is the first time i’ve sent an ask since becoming active on tumblr again for the first time since 2018!!

anyways, i just want to thank you bc you sparked my love for writing again!! i have always loved writing but my passion dwindled and dwindled as i got older and more busy )): but bc i became active on here again, i found you!!! and you’re so… YOU and it was inspiriting and i was like… i’m 20… i need to be ME. and now i live unabashedly as myself and write what i please. i even started posting on here a bit hehe… you kinda changed my life a bit. you should put that on ur resume.

THANK UUUUUUUUUU (can we smooch?? just a bit eheh 🙈)

- from a very thankful anon :3

WHAT THE FUCK NONNIEEEE:((((((( YOU CAN'T JUST SAY THIS TO ME AND EXPECT ME TO GO ON WITH MY DAY AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA I HAVE GENUINE TEARS IN MY EYES WHAT DO YOU MEAN I INSPIRED YOUUU WHAT DO YOU MEANN I NEED TO GO AND GRAB A BOX OF TISSES BRB YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW HAPPY THIS MAKES ME NONNIE!!!!!!!! to know that i've helped to bring back to writing, to know that me being loud here is helping ppl come out of their shells a bit more too is just sooooo..... wahhh i don't even know how to put it into words it just means so fucking much to me:((((((( i am VERY VERY VEEERY proud of you my love!!!!!! like so fucking proud!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AAAAAAHHHHHHHH THIS IS MAKING ME SO SAPPPYY OH MY GODDD I LOVE YOU SOOSO MUCH NONNIE MY DEAREST AND I HOPE THAT YOU'RE HAVING THE MOST WONDERFUL DAY EVER<33333 THANK YOU SM FOR DROPPING BY TO GIVE ME THIS GIFT AND THANK YOU SM FOR BEING HERE WITH ME IN THE FIRST PLACE🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏 I AM SENDING A MASSIVE WAVE OF KISSES YOUR WAY SO PLEASE SIT DOWN FOR THAT BC OTHERWISE YOU MIGHT FALL ON YOUR ASS. IT'S A LOT. HEHEHEHEHHEE THANK YOUU I FUCKING LOVE YOU<3333333333333

[liesmyth]

Idk how long F1 seasons are, but i've heard they're much shorter than nascar's. NASCAR has 38 races, 36 of which are for points (the other two are exhibition), if i'm remembering right. We race February-November every weekend, usually Sundays for Cup. There are I think 2 weeks off during all that time. Don't ask me when though because I can never remember.

But a driver must race in every race to be eligible to win the championship. You can get waivers if you were sick, had an injury, or experienced extenuating circumstances out of your control. (There's some Controversy related to that coming up soon for Kyle Larson, so we'll see if that definition changes)

Anyways. Our pit stops are different in that there are two tire changers, one jackman, one fueler, and one person who's only allowed to do the tear-off and give/take stuff for the driver (ie water, cough drops, very rarely a snack (under caution or red flag only!)).

That's it! So the crew has to race around the car if they're doing a four-tire pitstop. As a result, our record I believe is 8.6sec for four tires and fuel (I know it's by Christopher Bell. Might have been improved in the last few weeks, idk).

Before we went to single lugnuts a good stop was around 12 seconds I think? That's 5 little lugs per tire, same amount of crew members.

Every other series (highest to lowest: xfinity, truck, ARCA) still does those 5 lugs, I suspect because they're more inexperienced so if they go too soon the tire won't fall off entirely, since they will have a significantly more difficult time maintaining control of their vehicle.

Also, the vehicles can get into each other and even the wall and still be in the race (and potentially in contention)! From what i've seen f1 is not like that.

I forget if i've said, but nascar has a nascar 101 thing on their site that is pretty solid.

(If I hadn't told you my dad's name I wouldn't be on anon lol but) I hope you enjoy nascar! They have a bunch of races in their entirety on youtube. I'm not sure how recently they go, but avoid the races at the LA Coliseum and the 2024 Coke 600.

Nascar also has stages, which A. awards drivers points who are in the top 10

B. Bunches the drivers back up so the best driver has to be able to stay in the front with the competition near, and can't just drive away with it

C. Gives the audience two guaranteed pee breaks in the race

Okay. Now i'm going to go to bed. I've been writing this ask for an hour 😬

OKAY THANK YOU FOR ALL OF THIS! By contrast — you're right that F1 has a lot fewer races; there currently are 24 on the calendar, which is a record, and most drivers/teams complain that it's too much. A lot of the stress of too many races is due to the travel, which means spending hours and hours on planes for the whole travelling crew, accounting for timezone differences, and now I'm curious how the NASCAR calendar is structured in terms of which race comes after another — like, are they geographically close or do they go back and forth from one circuit to another? brb, I'm going to look it up.

I'm taking a leap of faith and checking out a nascar race tonight, I think it's the Cup Series? (I don't have prime but it's on my go-to sports streaming site opp) I don't foresee myself getting involved emotionally but I need something to watch in the background during no football season

[celestie0]

IT’S CELESTIEFAN3000 i have to say i like tumblr way more than ao3 so i’ll be using this to comment from now on 😋 But i would like to personally thank you for writing chapter 9, your author voice is genuinely so appealing and HONESTLY you could pass off as a literal professional author if I didn’t know this was fanfiction!

Now for the uglier feelings: (please ignore typos or other mistakes i wrote a lot. I am very normal about kickoff, obviously)

I SOBBED LIKE A BABY MIDWAY AND BECAME A CRYING SOUND EFFECT AT THE END OK OK OKAYYYYYYY 😭😭💫💫 I’m still dizzy and lightheaded from the effect ur writing gives me (THIS IS A GOOD THING) it’s so addicting i need more😭‼️ UGHHHH the way you build that exact RIGHT amount of comfort to compensate for the suffering you’ve but us through but still managed to EDGE US AT THE END . I WISH YOU WEREN’T SO GOOD AT THIS FANFICTION THING, BECAUSE DAMN! 😭😭😭😭

The scenes were so fucking beautiful, I love the peaceful atmosphere that rain gives and how you were able to contrast that as an escape from that horrible loud and noisy bar to just a horrible man!!!!! You really know how to direct scenes and i can not express in words how much they mean to me 🥹🥹😭😭😭

I feel like I’ve overused the crying face emoji too much in my ask BUT I ACTUALLY MEAN IT HERE EVERY TIME I can fill an entire glass up of my tears that kickoff caused me to shed alone 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

Everything was just great vegetables, this chapter will definitely be haunting me while I sleep but it ended with an amazing scenario to build off of and dream about RIGHT?☺️ Anyway, my last words here are that I admire how you’ve been working on this project for around a couple months now nonstop, but the quality has not dropped and has instead improved despite it getting really tiring the more you carry on with it! Maybe that’s just how I feel about finishing what I’ve started LMAO but it’s so impressive every time I see someone able to pull that off, I’ve seen some fics succumb to the tragedy of “i-just-want-to-get-this-over-with-because-the-concept-no-longer-interests-me-anymore”-ness 😔 BUT WITH KICKOFF! I’m so happy that the author is as passionate about the characters and plot in their fanfiction as I am, and hard work really does pay off! (for the reader, hard work is waiting 3 weeks for a new fic— but the read’s always better the longer you wait 😉)

My ADHD really came out here I deeply apologize but my ACTUAL final words are: I wish I had a bf like gojo, Oh My God You Are A Legend Ellie, You are most deserving person of meeting Gojo Satoru FIRST if he ever comes to life, it is 1am haha so i’m sleeping now ☺️🤍 Celestiefan300 out!

MY SWEET ANGEL BB CELESTIEFAN3000 😭🫶🏼💕💕 HI DEAR

UMM CAN I JUST SAY IM AB TO SOB ALR JUST FROM HOW LONG THIS ASK IS ??? PLS FORGIVE MY URGE TO RESPOND TO EVERY ASPECT OF IT

thank you sm for the compliments on the writinf omg i rly feel comin into my own now n finding my voice as i continue to write more so seeing u say that esp as a long term reader is just ssooo dhddldfk 🥺💕 brb gonna cry

PLS IM SO SORRY FOR THE SAD EMOTIONSS aaa yes the baby steps to build their relationship has been……baby stepping indeed LOL but it was so nice to write the scene at rhe end where gojo comforts her 😭💕 so excited to write lovey dovey gojo now

OMG STOPPP w the nice words i will literally eat u for breakfast🧍🏻‍♀️the contrast w the soothing rain & hectic bar scene 😭 u pointing that out just made me soooo freaking happyy and wahh im so glad the scenes resonate w you :””) <33

ME TOO I FEEL IM HOLDING BACK ALL THE 😭😭😭 WMOJIS I COULD USE READING THIS ASK

awhh thanks darling im so happy kickoff has ur continued interest and AW to hear its improving means sm to me 🥺💕 im so passionate ab it, it has been so cathartic to write, and although its also hard to write sometimes bc of the personal aspects, it’s so joyous to me and i look forward to seeing it thru to the end w the same amt of passion. HAHAHA its hard work to read tho damn 😮‍💨 ur not wrong!! and also yes i too will be daydreaming of what happens next 🤣

my final words: i love u sm, YOU deserve a satoru (but i will gladly have him too if u say so🙈), so blessed to have u as a reader, and please get some good sleep my love <33

eeeeeee 🫶🏼💕

[taegularities]

Now that the pain has passed I can finally leave a baby ass review

Rid. RID. How do you manage to make us feel so much? I cried reading this fic, I felt the pain right in my bones and I literally could not stop. You have a way with words that just makes me break and heal and smile and cry and I hope you appreciate that precious talent of yours as much as you should <3 cmi is a work of art from start to finish, and it is definitely the kind of story that will stick with me for a while. I can’t wait to see more of Jungkook’s pov bc homie is fucking up real bad. I can’t wait to see reader with hobi bc it’s pretty obvious that that’s where this is going (hopefully not lmao). I can’t wait to see Jungkook and reader finding their way back together bc I know for a fact that you don’t write sad endings

Oof. Just so many emotions and so little words in a dictionary to explain just how much I feel each time I’m reading you. Thank you for sharing your art on this platform✨

But I am still in pain. Do not think that I’m not in pain smh… that okay.. okay at the end?? NOT OKAY. She should fight for him, tell him that she’ll move out and drop the job and become a writer bc that’s what she needs to do if she wants to be with him. And he needs to stop thinking he doesn’t belong in her world bc he literally IS her world like come on jungkook😭

Brb, I’m going to go cry some more

ella, two days later and i'm still so 🥺🥺🥺 about this review. you're too kind and i don't deserve you and i love you and i just, i'm running out of words, bc how tf is everyone here so kind, i'm fkn baffled ??? 😭

i definitely appreciate whatever i put in my docs, but the biggest reason for it are readers like you 🥺 i mean, i'm 100% sure i wouldn't have the confidence to put out so many chapters of a slice of life fic if you weren't so encouraging and sweet about it. like... "a work of art from start to finish"? how could i not feel all the motivation in the world, reading such praises :(((

okay whew, once again, we're a little more emotional today hahaha

but anyway, yes, you're so right. homie is fucking up real bad, but i also hope you guys will understand him a little better after the next chapter. i'm already working on it and my heart is in shambles. ha ha also the hobi bit 🥴 no comment...

yes, absolutely correct!! we don't do sad endings in taegularities town 💕

THE "Okay... Okay" GOSH, THE STAR OF THIS CHAPTER FR. i love and hate how much this has been affecting everyone bc same 😭 like, she wants to fight for him, but she's also done yknow?? she just. shut herself off :( her becoming a writer is such a good idea. it'd be so nice if both could follow their artistic dreams.

and yep, once again.. "he literally IS her world" broke my heart. that's it. ella i love you. a lot. please don't forget, you're one of so many lovely people who keep me going on this platform, and i'll never be able to express my gratitude <33

[the-type-a]

•Dilf! Duncan says “oh my god” like bob belcher all the time and he doesn’t realize it.

-Baby spills juice? “oh my god”

-Courtney nags him about mess? “oh my god”

-Baby drops an absolute stink bomb in their diaper? “oh my god”

•Duncan buys their kids those shirts like “my dad can kick your dad’s ass” and Courtney only lets them wear it at home lol

•I can’t get it out of my head of that idea where they put his mugshot on a coffee mug & that shit says “World’s #1 Dad” and I can’t remember for the life of me who originally HC’s that!! Sorry babes 🥲 but yes, that’s very much his first Father’s Day gift lmao

•Duncan definitely let’s his baby taste a slice of lemon and records their reaction, Courtney’s appalled but low key finds their faces cute and funny af

•Their kids are the type of kids that start eating spicy shit at a really young age, it’s ridiculous & a little amazing,

Based on the fact that my nephew could eat an entire bag of hot cheetos when he was like 5 with no issue, we found this out when he got into his dad’s junk food stash 😂 he was fine and honestly wanted more.. weird kid, love him💕

•Their kids are the type to speak their mind, especially their daughter so like if they go to a friends house for dinner or something they’re like “where’s the seasoning?” Because they’re so used to their mom and dad’s cooking 💀 Courtney apologizes profusely and Duncan just laughs

•one of their children definitely flips them off during an ultrasound and that’s the one Duncan frames✨

•The duncney children are the type of kids that want to try their cup of coffee and both of them refuse until they’re like “fine, go ahead, you’re not gonna like it.” cue one of the duncney children taking a sip of pure black coffee that’s EXTRA strong and they want to GAG, but they inherited both of their parents stubbornness and swallow it with tears in their eyes saying, “it’s good.” They never ask for a sip again 😂

Duncan whenever anything out of his control happens with the kids, “Oh my God.” 💀

—

Can we talk about how Duncan would be an amazing father though? Like yes, he’s scary af whenever need be, but when he’s just able to be around the family?? He’s a big softy.

We all know his dad doesn’t win father of the year for Duncan. Yikes. But Duncan would do anything to make sure his kids feel loved and would never judge them. The kids can come to him with absolutely everything. Of course, if it’s super bad he’s flipping tf out, but they’re not scared to go to him.

He would definitely buy them mini rock band t-shirts growing up. What would really shock him is when his oldest is actually into the old school rock/punk music. Physically she’s a mini Courtney, personality wise? That’s Duncan’s child all the way 😂

They would make handmade Father’s Day gifts for him. Courtney helps them write the words on the mugs, t-shirts, and drawings. Duncan takes whatever he can pin to the wall at work. He’s proud of every single thing the kids make. It could be a page full of scribbles and he’s pinning up.

Imagine Duncan at a sporting event for the kids? He’d flip the referee off if they call a penalty or some shit. The coaches are just eyeing Courtney begging her to control her husband LMAO but she gets like that too 😂

Omg the spicy food and coffee HCs?! Those children will not even touch anything that doesn’t have a little bit of spice. and the coffee? Freaking dead, that’s 100% accurate!

Brb adding that HC of the ultrasound to What Happens Now 🤗

[mint-yooxgi]

the idea of 8 demon entities drooling over you like that...brb i need a fucking minute. holy FUCK that was hot my head it SPINS. i love how much their desire was displayed, from the words of reverence and praise, to the more depraved parts like panty sniffing and just taking in scent like a bunch of hungry beasts like yes??? sign me the fuck up??? please the way jongho just makes himself into your throne and spreads your thighs with his while wooyoung kneels for his queen and the rest of them watch like that??? way too fucking hot for this world. my jaw literally dropped at some points the things you have these men saying make my damn brain short circuit. but also this????

“The added fact that you can feel their heated gazes on you, noticing how most of them begin to stroke themselves over their pants in time with your breaths has your stomach twisting in pleasure. Never have you ever felt so desired before in your entire life, and you wouldn’t want it any other way.What makes this moment all the more intense is the love you can see dripping within their eyes as they continue to stare at you. You can feel it in your bones: they don’t view you as some object to them, but as their equal. Always, and forever, you are theirs, just as much as they are yours.”

instant. NUUUUUUUUUT

also not mc telling hongjoong to keep the panties. idk but the thought of him getting off to them in his room over and over again is super fucking hot, especially if it’s a fantasy sequence like the one in the earlier part. idk panty sniffing demons are just hot

yea...yea i’m gonna need all the water to cool down after this chapter this was hot as all hell like nothing but

No, no, exactly! EXACTLY!!!!!! 

Ehehehe, thank you so much, I'm so happy to know that you enjoyed the chapter!! Once I finally found the flow I had way too much fun writing it all out, so I'm glad others are enjoying it as much as I am!! I really wanted to emphasize the desire and desperation they all have for the OC, and I'm so glad it came through!

And lmaooo you just know Hongjoong indulged himself over and over again with that little gift from the OC hehehe perhaps I'll write another short little snippet of what he does as some point... ;)

Ehehehe, anyways, thank you so much for this and for reading!!! I’m so happy you enjoyed the chapter, and I cannot wait for you to see what happens next!!

[wexhappyxfew]

1, 3 and 16 please? For the fanfic writer asks ^^.

AH HELLO!!! thanks so much for stopping by the askbox! i appreciate it so so much and this ask game was just too cool to pass up, thank you so much for dropping in! :)

What fic of yours would you recommend to someone who had never read any of your work? (In other words, what do you think is the best introduction to your fics?)

I think I would have to say Landslide :) Just because that's the fic I've been working on for over two years by now, it's the one I really saw that growth in both me as well as my writing and the one I think I'll always come back to once I'm done writing it. I will always cherish Sunshine Solider and TSOS/AAPA, but Landslide really has impacted me the most as a writer. Natia has been a character I have connected with so deeply and have really developed so heavily and really fleshed out that I can't be prouder of it. It's the first time a character to me, has genuinely felt like a human being. Between the interconnectedness of her plotline with Easy Company's, the involvement of the personification of Death, as well as the complexity Natia delves into; I just can't be prouder, and I'll be so excited to see Landslide come to its finish!

3. What are some tropes or details that you think are very characteristic of your fics?

FOUND FAMILY!!!!! (brb sobbing) My absolute top favorite trope EVER! I will write it in every single fic I can haha! I also am a sucker for friends-to-lovers. I tend to tap into that with every fic I write, even with the upcoming ATTDC, I can't help it! I did a bit of enemies-to-acquaintances-to-lovers in Landslide which was a JOY to write and I'm attempting that in ATTDC upcoming as well. Hurt/comfort is constant in every fic, it gives the fluff and angst we all need LOL. In terms of details, I feel I'm moving more with Landslide and ATTDC into darker topics and ideas; I feel it's more related to my maturity levels going up with those topics in writing and such (if that even makes sense), but when I was younger (I started these fics in high school to be fair lol!), it wasn't as dark. But these more upcoming ones definitely are, but I almost enjoy them more - it makes things more complex and ideas deeper. I just love writing it that way!

16. What’s an AU you would love to read (or have read and loved)?

I'm going to be honest; I don't read many AUs, but I definitely want to read more!! I think if I were to read an AU that I would eat up, it would be those apocalypse/zombie AU things haha! I LOVE those so much! The impact of trying to survive and caring for others at the same time and having that family bonding going on just AH! I love it every single time no matter the fandom!

[bratshaws]

through the hourglass 91. brb x oc

a/n: I really needed a fluffy chapter. I really, really did. This month might be complicated and I hope I can manage it.

pairing: plus size!oc x rooster

warnings: two idiots in love. <3

goodness gracious (pls read this one to know more what this fic is about!!)

chapter

1/

50/51/52/53/54/55/56/57/58/59/60/61/62/63/64/65/66/67/68/69/70/71/72/73/74/75/76/77/78/79/80/81/82/83/84/85/86/87/88

/89/90

(pls let me know if you want to be added to the taglist! )

taglist: @mirandastuckinthe80s @roosterschanelslut @wiipes @lcahwriter @shrimping-for-all @gretagerwigsmuse @frenchtoastix

@lizzie-rdj @fanboyluvr @atarmychick007 @comebacktoearthpls

@peachiicherries @mak-32 @lizziespidiepridie @roosterswifey @ollyoxenfrees @piceous21 @sqrlgrl22 @hofficoffi @lexhalstead3 @lorilane33 @legendarydreamersharkparty @luckyladycreator2

@emilybradshaw @j-6o @louisahale @leobabbyyy @kulicny @winter-run @ktjmac @graciereads @bigpoppajes @taytaylala12

@caitsymichelle13 @becks-things @caatheeriinee07 @dhwanishah09 @jesfreedark @katiemcrae @lilmonstrjedi @hobiismyhopeu @teacupsandtopgun @insominac23 @gh0stsgoodgirl @mygyn @chavivaelisheva

-

Beatrice wakes up before he does, just as she planned to. She peeks up at him, seeing his eyes were closed and the soft snoring didn’t break when she moved a bit - wriggling out of his grasp. She bites her lower lip as she carefully lifts his arm from her waist, making a face when he groans a bit but just buries his face into the pillow instead of waking up.

She just wanted to pamper him a bit and she knew that the thoughts he had last night wouldn’t leave his brain that easily. She slid off the bed as quietly as she could, even falling on her knees on top of the rug, peeking over the edge of the mattress to check if he was still sleeping.

He was but his brows furrowed as his arm touched nothing, she even saw his fingers curling on top of the sheets. She didn’t have much time, so she moved as quickly - and as quietly - as possible. Beatrice fixes her nightshirt on her body as she sets his clothes on the chair, sneaking looks to her husband’s sleeping form every now and again, she sets his boots right in front of it and then with one of the sticky notes she had saved up she writes a little message to put on top.

“Okay.” she smiles but then immediately winces when she hears him moaning again, the type of moan that meant he’d wake up soon, “Oh shit. No, no,no.” she rushes over to the bed, leaning down to kiss his temple, sighing in relief when he relaxes.

“Where are you?” comes his groggy voice, eyes still closed.

“I’m going to the bathroom,Roos.’ It was a lie but he didn’t have to know that.

He hums deeply in his throat, “No, c’mere….bed feels empty.”

She smiles sweetly at him, kissing his cheek this time, “In a little bit,okay? I’ll be right back.”

And she steps back from the bed, waiting just until he gets back to deep sleep. Rooster’s brows relaxed and his shoulders sagged as he snored, Beatrice closing her eyes in relief as she leaves the room. 

Except that Rooster wakes up seconds after she’s gone, so her plan is really not working that great.

He blinks his eyes open, blurred colors sharpening into the furniture in their bedroom, his irises moving around in hopes he could see Beatrice anywhere but, alas, she’s not there. He pushes himself to his elbows, looking back to the bathroom only to see it was dark “Bea?” he calls, only to hear her downstairs…almost trying to not make any noise but the obvious ‘shit!’ as she dropped something meant she wasn’t doing a good job.

“Bea?” he calls again, a bit louder but not loud enough to wake Nicole up, even checking on the monitor only to see his baby girl with her mouth open and eyes closed,  sometimes kicking her legs in her sleep. After that he turns on the bed to sit up, blinking groggily at his surroundings until he sees the chair in the corner of the room.

His clothes were there, nicely folded and with something colorful on top.

At first he thinks he’s seeing things but there’s a bright pink something on top.

He groans as he rubs his face with a hand, yawning quietly - the subtle pop of his jaw making him wince a bit - and smacking his lips. He looks back at his folded clothes, kicking the covers off of him until he can stand up to check what was on top of his uniform.

He gently plucks the sticky note up, bringing it close to his eyes and a smile appears on his face.

“If you were a triangle you’d be acute one!” with the drawing of a smiling triangle under her writing. He chuckles, shaking his head at how sweet Beatrice could be. She didn’t have to wake up so early, even though he could hear her moving around downstairs, trying her best to be quiet.

Bradley just looks back towards the door, his smile only widening the longer he holds this little love note that she got for him…God he sometimes couldn’t believe they were married, because someone as sweet as Beatrice was so incredibly rare that he wondered if he was dreaming.

But after some thought he decided to actually take a shower, slipping the little note in his shirt’s pocket because he had to keep that with him that day. He took a quick shower, mainly to wake up, and walked out tightening his watch around his wrist.

As he steps onto the hallway, he does a double take towards the door where another sticky note was, this time in neon green.

“I love spending koala-ty time with you!” and the drawing of a little koala sitting on a tree right beside it.

He just stares at the little note with his stomach fluttering, plucking it off the door and chuckling as he holds it with both hands. He didn’t know what made her do that but he wasn’t complaining, in fact he loved it so much that he was wondering if there were more.

And he finds another one, sticking to the railing. 

“I love your top, it must be made of husband material!” followed by a drawing of a Hawaiian shirt.

That one made him laugh out loud, slowly walking down the steps towards the first floor only to hear Beatrice’s soft giggle from the kitchen. He found another one by the kitchen’s threshold

“I can never be mad at you but I will always be mad about you!”

And this one was probably his favorite, because she drew them.

Well, their faces, close to one another with the dot eyes and cute smiles, tiny hearts surrounding them. He just laughs softly, “...this is really fucking cute.”

“I’m glad you like it!” comes her response and she practically skips towards him, keeping her hands raised so they wouldn’t touch his clean uniform. He leans down to meet her lips in a slow kiss, one that makes her laugh into his mouth, pecking him twice once he’s done, “I’m making something special for you.”

“Yeah?” he looks over to her hands, “What is it?

“Chocolate muffins.”

“No way.”

“Way.” she giggles, kissing him again, “Hm! I need to wash my hands.” she slowly backs away from him so her dirty palms wouldn’t touch his clothes, but he just tugged on her night shirt, preventing her from leaving.

“Roos.”

“Bea.” he replies in the same, endearing yet admonishing intonation, smirking at her, “I can lick them clean for you~”

Her face flamed up and she squeaked, “No!” she manages to slip away from his grasp, hurrying to wash her hands before he catches her again. “We both know what will happen after.”

“Oh I hope so.”

‘Rooster you have work today.” she whispers, biting back her smile when Rooster comes from behind, hugging her waist and kissing her temple, trailing the said kisses down her cheek until he reached her neck, “We can’t-” she inhales shakily when he nips her neck ,’W-We can’t d-do um…”

“Use your words, gorgeous.” God, his voice got so deep sometimes Beatrice swore it touched every single nerve in her body. His hands trailed up her thighs until he reaches her underwear, fiddling with the thin lace, “What did I do to deserve such a nice surprise from my lovely wife?”

That question sobered her up a bit, and she turned her head to face him, “...you don’t have to do anything.” she whispered, “I just want to give you something nice before you left.”

Rooster’s cheeks flushed, his golden skin made it a bit hard to see but Beatrice knew him well enough to know when he was blushing. He chuckled embarrassedly, looking at the ground before propping his chin on her shoulder, “I don’t mind that.” he whispers, kissing her neck, “I really don’t.”

“Good because I also got something from Mr.Scoops.”

“What? When?!”

“Oh a few hours back. Overnight shipping,” she grins, kissing his parted lips,top then bottom, before kissing both of them “And its Belgian crunch Macchiato cake.” He gasps “With dark chocolate frosting.” He gasps louder. 

“Okay, hold on now.” he hasn’t let her go yet, “What’s all this,gorgeous? Really, why the sudden surprise- also when did you call Mr.Scoops,weren’t we both asleep?”

Beatrice sighs while slowly wrapped her arms around his neck,gently brushing the faded part of his hair with the tips of her fingers, “Roos,” she begins in that gentle voice that always makes him melt, “You don’t need to do anything for me to give you something nice,” she brushes over the Bradshaw pinned to his chest, “And you don’t need to worry if you need to do anything as such…I just felt like you’d like this when you woke up.”

Rooster’s gaze softened, his eyelids lowering just a bit as his cheeks flushed. He tightened his hold against her waist, then pulled her close to him until their chests touched, his lips pressing on her temple. He did that to hide the bashful smile and hopefully keep the butterflies inside of him.

How does she do this?

How?

It’s been three years together and she never ceases to surprise him every day. He keeps holding her, kissing her temple, then her cheekbone, her jawline before he meets her lips in a soft kiss, “Thank you. I really like it.”

Beatrice’s eyes glinted with pure adoration, “I’m glad.” and she stepped back from his hold, kissing his knuckles before pushing him to the kitchen table, “Now go,go! I’m going to give you your breakfast. And then I’ll check on Nikki, she’s going to wake up soon anyway.” and she cups his face one last time to kiss him again, giggling against his mouth, “Okay, enough kissing.”

“Is it?” he tries to meet her lips again, but she’s faster, tapping his own lips as she walks away from him. Rooster just lets out a soft laugh, keeping his head propped on a hand as he watches Beatrice move around, finishing his breakfast. She knew his time was limited but the fact she was preparing something so wonderful for him just…because she felt like he’d be happy to have something like that.

“Hey.” he calls and she turns around with a little smile,holding his steaming mug in her hands, “Wanna marry me?”

Beatrice’s eyes widened, then blinked and then she let out a soft laugh, tossing her head back with pure amusement, “Again? I thought we went through this before.”

“Will you?”

Her eyes softened, “Yes,always.” she giggles, setting his coffee mug in front of him, “Careful it’s hot.” 

“Yeah, you are.” and he swats her left butt cheek when she turns around, earning a startled yelp from his wife, followed by her glare. He just smiles boyishly, sipping his coffee loudly and humming once he swallows, “Babe your coffee is out of this world,” he looks down into the mug, “Did you put some cocoa chips here?” Beatrice’s glare softens and she nods, “Fuck, marry me again.”

“Yes,”she laughs, kissing his cheekbone, “I will.” Beatrice looks at the door only to see Eleanor standing there, softly ‘boofing’ to alert her that Nicole is awake. Beatrice cups his face one more time, “I’ll be right back,” she giggles against his lips, pecking him a few more times before she walks away.

Rooster tilts his head towards her ass, smiling as he sees the red handprint vibrant on her pale buttcheek as he sips his coffee. He however relaxes, leaning back on his seat with his eyes closed. “...fuck.” he chuckles, rubbing his eyes, “Fuck, I–” he just shrugs at nothing, then looks down at Jolene who’s sitting next to him, “...she’s amazing, isn’t she Jojo?” the pittie wags her tail against the tiles, licking her maw, “She’s so incredible and she’s sweet, and she’s…mine. She’s my wife and ugh.”

Sometimes he felt like a boy with a crush with Beatrice, he loved her reactions, he loved how she smiled with her whole face when looking at him, he loved how she seemed to shine whenever he was close and how every time - every time - they met eyes at the bar she still blushed.

He drops his head on top of his folded arms, chuckling like a boy in love the more he thinks about it, “Fuck, she’s my wife.” he whispers “She’s my wife and the mother of our child- I–...” he couldn’t be happier, maybe this was the happiest he’s ever been. He still had doubts, demons and traumas to deal with but Beatrice’s presence…was soothing, was healing, it was what his heart wanted for so long.

And he got it.

Rooster’s ears perk up at the soft voices from Beatrice and Nicole coming down the stairs “That’s mommy’s hair, no biting it,” he smiles as he straightens himself, looking towards the door waiting to see his girls. And he sees Nicole first, her light eyes still squinting because of sleep and her hair messed up in all directions.

Nicole yawns, rubbing one of her hands against her eyes before she focuses on her father…and then she’s fully awake. Beatrice laughs when Nicole immediately vocalizes and reaches towards Rooster, “Yes,yes,I know you wanna be with him during the mornings.”

“Hey,there’s enough of me for everyone,” he grins, putting his plate and mug away to gently whisper ‘hi! hi birdie!’ to Nikki when Beatrice placed her in his hands, “Hi,sweetie! Hi!” he coos, kissing her soft cheek, “Good morning to you too, did you sleep well?” Nicole babbles something, holding his index finger and gurgling a laugh when he wiggles it in her grasp, “You are getting stronger and stronger every day Nikki.”

“She is isn’t she? She’s grabbing a lot of stuff.”

“She’s going to have a mean throw when she’s older.” he leans closer to his daughter, “Do you wanna learn baseball? I can teach you some things.” Nicole smiles more, patting his face, “Yeah? You do? I know a few tricks.”

Beatrice just sips her own morning latte with her eyes on Rooster and Nicole, loving how he managed to eat and talk to Nikki at the same time. In reality her heart warmed so much because of that, he was such a good father and she wanted to remind him of that, “Oh, by the way, today-” she says, “Me and Nikki are joining Ev for baby shopping.”

Rooster looks up from Nicole with his brows up, “Really?”

“Yes, she wants to get some infant clothes out of the way. She’s only one month pregnant but…maybe she’s more excited than she lets on…and Shells is coming with.” she says, “So me and Nikki are going to spend a lovely day with her aunties, isn’t that right Nikki?”

Nicole babbles something, her eyes directed to her father’s uniform, more specifically the buttons that kept it closed. Rooster smiles looking down at their daughter, gently swiping some of the bangs on her forehead to the side so he could kiss it, “It’s going to be fun,I’m sure.”

“I think so!” Bea grins, placing the mug aside, “Because I saw this adorable outfit for Nikki too and she’d look so cute,Roos!”

“Send me a pic when you get it.”

“As if you have to ask.”

Her smile just made his whole body feel warm, his whisky colored eyes shining with pure adoration towards her, “Baby.” he calls, making her look towards him, “C’mere.” she just gives him a confused stare, “C’mere.” and he pats his thighs twice.

“...Roos, you have Nikki in your arms.”

“They are big enough to hold both of you.” he pats again, “Please? Even Nikki wants you.” and he holds their daughter up so their cheeks touch, Nicole babblering excitedly with her little arms reaching for Beatrice.

The brunette lets out a pained sigh - followed by a smile - before walking towards him, “Alright, I need room-” and he immediately pushes the chair back with a loud scrape that scares Jack but only makes Nicole giggle, “You are relentless.”

“Yes.” he purrs, kissing her cheek when she settles on his lap, “I am,because my wife makes me feel that way.”

“Your wife, huh?”

“Yep.”

Beatrice adjusts Nicole in her arms, lowering her face until their noses touched, “You are lucky she finds you absolutely adorable.” he smiles, earning another quick kiss to the lips, only to have it again as Beatrice giggled, “And very handsome.”

Nicole, who was watching this whole thing wide eyed, just made quiet noises, waving her arms then shoving one of her tiny fists into her mouth, “She’s hungry,I’m sorry Nikki.” Beatrice said, looking around trying to find a way to escape only for Rooster to wrap his arm around her waist “...Roos…”

“You can do it, can’t you?”

“You just want to look at my tits.” he flicked his eyes down to her still covered chest quickly, cheek dimpling because that was exactly why, “Awful, awful man.” she giggles, but he does lean back a little more to give her extra room. She would never cease to be amazed with how broad and tall her husband was…because he was literally keeping both of them on his lap and it didn’t bother him at all. 

Rooster took another bite of his breakfast, holding Beatrice’s sleeve as she placed Nikki close to her chest, wincing a bit when her daughter latched, “Ow.”

“Everything okay?”

“Yeah,” she checks down at Nicole who just has her eyes closed as she enjoys her breakfast, “Just the usual pressure, she has no teeth yet.”

Rooster hums, propping his chin on her shoulder to watch the scene with his eyes soft, sometimes moving his gaze to Beatrice’s face just to see that cute smile spread the longer she looked at Nicole. He kisses her shoulder, making her eyes shift towards him, “I’m gonna miss you today.” and her eyes appeared to have hearts in them, her cheeks flushing a soft red as she let go of Nicole’s hand to rub his cheek, “I mean it.”

“You’ll be home soon,Roos.” she reassures, combing a few strands of sandy brown back, “And you’ll be home and you’ll see us.”

“I know.” he almost whines about it, burying his face on the back of her shirt, “But I can’t help it.”

Beatrice tsks cutely, “Aw,handsome,” she cups his chin to kiss his lips again, “You are so cute when you are clingy.” she laughs at his narrowed gaze, only to squeak a laugh when he playfully pokes her side, “Stop, I’m feeding Nikki.” 

“Nikki doesn’t seem bothered.”

Both of them looked at their daughter, “When does she?” Beatrice smiles, “She’s the chillest baby I’ve ever met. Not even I was this cool with everything.”

Nicole in response just peeks one eye open then closes it, because she’s clearly unbothered. Rooster smiles, sipping the rest of his coffee, “Thanks for the breakfast,by the way. It was delicious.”

“Anything for you.” she smiles, kissing the tip of his nose, pressing their foreheads together “Anything.”

[the-scandalorian]

omg

there are so many little tidbits you drop into your writing that just remind me how fucking thoughtful and smart you are:

The safety, which comes off more jarring than comforting. Does he… hug you? He can count on three fingers who he’s hugged for the past twenty years, and he’s sorely out of practice. His seat is an easy three steps to the door, an escape plan in his back pocket

those details are so JOEL

‘You need things fixed?’ he asks, and promptly wants to kick himself for sounding so hopeful to be of service.

brb breaking everything in my home

Glancing across the yard, he catches Ellie’s eye, who’s arching an inquisitive eyebrow and pointing straight at you with all the subtlety of a flying brick.

literally lol'd at that

honestly, i can’t decide who likes Joel saying “sweetheart” more.. is it reader or is it joel? the man finds EVERY excuse to whip it out and i love it

You find yourself wishing he’d tucked the tails in.

me and reader starting up a chant of SHOW US YOUR ASS

His lips twitch wryly. ‘What a waste of perfectly good cream cheese.’

feel free to lick it off OMG HE ALMOST DOES are you in my head

He looms closer, bending at the waist and for one moment of madness, you think he might lean down and lick your neck clean. 

girl same

‘You can have my shirt,’ he offers.

catch me spilling something on myself every time we’re together

‘That a yes?’ he prompts, hooking his thumbs through the belt loops in your jeans and tugging your body flush against his, his stubbled chin brushing the sensitive crook of your neck as he speaks into your ear.

passing out from the delectable tactic detail in this

omg your ellie is so good and silly and right

THE KISS!!!!

For a man as hardened as Joel Miller, he sure kisses soft.

✨perfection✨

III ║ Edgestitch

Joel Miller x F!Reader

{ Part II: Threads | Series Masterlist | Main Masterlist }

Rating: M

Summary: You wear those jeans for Joel when you see him again at the baby shower at Tommy and Maria's - like he asked you to.

Warnings: Spicy thoughts but not explicit, sexual tension, sexual innuendos, flirting, mention of food and drink, some language, shy!reader, reader has a nickname related to her job, soft!Joel, no use of Y/N

Word count: 7k

Notes: It's here! This one was a long and winding road as I mentioned in Behind the Seams, I'm so relieved and excited when it all finally clicked and fell into place! I'm absolutely blown away by the love you guys have shown Joel and Pin so far, thank you, there's no greater motivation for a writer ❤️ I hope you guys enjoy the chapter!

‘Damnit, Lucy,’ you mutter under your breath, this close to stamping your foot and pouting at the door that refuses to lock up. 

Lucy may be your best friend, but you’re not blind to the fact that she literally cannot be trusted to get anything done around the shop. It’s been two weeks since she promised to get the locksmith to come in, but here you are on Friday evening, wrestling with the key that refuses to turn the last quarter of an inch in the faulty lock.

‘Hey, Pin!’

Glancing over your shoulder, you force a wane smile at Tommy, who has his hands full with a cardboard box at the bottom of the stairs. ‘Need some help?’

‘Yes, please,’ you reply sheepishly.

You nod at the bottles of wine that clink delicately against one another as he sets them down. ‘Getting ready for the party on Sunday?’

Tommy steps up to the door and wriggles the key left and right experimentally. ‘Yeah, you comin’, right?’

‘Yes, with Lucy.’

‘Good, the more the merrier!’ He makes a face at the door lock, which is not cooperating with him either. ‘You should get someone to look at it. Probably time for a new one.’

‘Lucy was supposed to get Andrew to fix it, but you know Luce.’

Tommy yanks the door knob backwards hard as he twists the key. There’s a grunt of metal, and a triumphant aha! when it finally turns, the internal mechanisms of the lock sliding into place with a satisfying click. 

You nearly fall onto your knees in relief. ‘Thank you so much, Tommy. You’re a lifesaver.’

He grins and deposits the key in your waiting palm. ‘You can ask Joel for help, you know. He’s handy with this kind of stuff.’

You blink, blindsided by the seemingly random mention of his brother - but his dimpled smile tells you otherwise.

His brother, who was so solid and broad under you on the studio floor, just a few days ago. His brother, who you can still feel pressed between your thighs, in your bed in the dead of night. His brother, who has taken up residence in your mind, waking or otherwise, since he sauntered out of your shop with that infuriatingly attractive confidence when he asked you to to wear those jeans for him again on Sunday.

Joel has existed solely and safely in the parameters of your workspace for the past fortnight and a half, with only Lucy bearing witness to whatever it is between the two of you. Having to suddenly deal with any mention of him outside of it, especially with that knowing arch of Tommy’s eyebrow, has you completely flustered. It doesn’t help that his eyes are uncannily like Joel’s, a gorgeous deep brown, expressive and sharp, though the mischief sits a lot closer to the surface in the former’s.

Mercifully, your brain unscrambles long enough for you to reach the conclusion that of course, Joel must have told Tommy that he invited you and Lucy. It’s their party, after all. Surely, he doesn’t know anything else -

Or does he?

You’ve been quiet for too long to say anything about it now, so you clumsily change the subject, stumbling over your words. ‘I, uh - I was just wondering what I could bring on Sunday?’

Tommy graciously lets you off the hook. ‘We’re a bit short on sweets, actually, if you bake.’

You latch on to that gratefully. ‘I do - what kind of cake were you thinking?’

‘Do you make a carrot cake?’

You perk up. ‘It’s my favourite!’

He flashes you a cheeky grin. ‘What a funny coincidence, it’s Joel’s as well - the only way to get carrots in him.’

Your pulse spikes with adrenaline at the unexpected tidbit Tommy drops in your lap, and you greedily squirrel that little fact away, slowly colouring in the Joel-shaped space in your head.

With a wink, Tommy bends down to pick up the wine. ‘See you in a couple of days, Pin!’

At least you have the decency to wait until he turns the corner - once he does, you sprint across the road to the Jackson Grocer’s and clear out their stock of carrots for the day.

There are many things about Jackson that throw Joel. 

The plentitude after years of rations. The safety, which comes off more jarring than comforting.

But most of all, it’s the sounds. The kettle on the boil and the pop of the toaster in the morning when Ellie gets ready for school. Friendly chatter on the high street. Laughter. It still makes him jump when he hears playful shrieks in the neighbourhood playground, blood rushing in his ears and sending him halfway across the house for his rifle before he remembers where he is.

Where he is not.

It was always loud in the QZ. Loudspeakers blaring, alarms wailing, the indistinct hum of conversation and radio through paper thin walls in the slums at all hours of the day. And he was always listening - for danger, for trouble, and everything in between.

And then all that noise had blown up, literally, with the State House. With Tess.

Joel finds it hard to remember those first few days after leaving Boston behind. Mostly the raw cuts on his knuckles that wouldn’t heal and the ring in his right ear from the explosion, lingering like a pesky fly. 

But he knows it was Ellie who broke that silence first. And once that door was kicked down - 

‘Fuck no, dude!’

His face snaps up and he scowls across the lawn, the stern reprimand rolling off his tongue like second nature. ‘Ellie!’

She’s sitting with her friends, crowded around her most prized possession of the moment, a boombox she found in the thrift shop a couple of months ago and begged him to buy and fix up for her. 

Not that she needed to do much begging, he caved far too easily. It plays a bit wonky - the bass too heavy - still, it does the trick.

The teenagers around her cower immediately, but she defiantly stands her ground. ‘What?’

‘Watch your language,’ he barks, no real bite behind it.

She rolls her eyes so hard her head falls back, and he has to press his lips together to not smile.

It helps him sleep better at night seeing Ellie fit right in - at least one of them has. She doesn’t hate going to school half as much as she pretends to, the routine of homework and chores anchoring her to small town life. She’s even volunteered to help out at the farm, spending most afternoons in the stables with the horses.

There are times when he wonders to which extent all this is a coping mechanism. But well, at least she’s coping.

And while Joel still hasn’t made up his mind about Jackson, its townsfolk seem to have unilaterally made theirs up about him. The wary whispers and watchful stares have given way to cautious gestures of acknowledgement, some even bold enough to throw a good morning in his general direction as he walks down the street. 

They nod at him now as they file into the garden party, still keeping their distance, but not as much as he would’ve liked.

The expectant parents have gone all out for the occasion. Several tables are lined up end to end in the middle of the garden, filling up with potluck dishes as guests arrive. Tommy lords over the barbeque, the brisket having been smoking since dawn, with chicken, bacon and homemade sausages sizzling on the grill. Maria is in her element, flitting from well wisher to well wisher with a protective hand over her rounded belly, making sure everyone has a drink and a loaded plate in hand.

Joel hovers in no man’s land, dodging the crowds and sipping on beer that has long gone flat, trying to remember the last time he celebrated anything. 

Well, he supposes dinner parties at Bill and Frank’s count, as far and few in between as they were. Not that they ever celebrated anything specific, per se - they didn’t need a reason beyond the fact that they were all still alive and kicking. Bill, bless his soul, did make a mean roast, and Frank used to host with enough flair for forty instead of four. Tess had a black dress she stowed away at the back of her closet for these parties, and a red one that she saved for the really special occasions -

A strong hand on his back jolts him forward and out of his thoughts, spilling lukewarm beer over his fingers.

‘Havin’ a good time, brother?’ asks Tommy jovially, cheeks stretched with joy.

‘I was just now,’ he grunts pointedly.

Tommy grins. ‘Lighten up, man. Get drunk, be merry! You’re gonna be an uncle.’

‘Don’t try to butter me up. I ain’t babysittin’ for you.’

Thumping his chest in mock hurt, he asks, ‘What about all those times I babysat Sarah, man?’

Joel gives him a long-suffering side stare. ‘Please. You used to hire that college chick ‘cross the street to babysit whenever you were supposed to. Then you’d hit on her all night long.’

Tommy chuckles. ‘Damn, your mind’s in better shape than I give you credit for, old man.’

He can’t help a smile. ‘But for all your devious plans to get into her babysitter’s pants, Sarah did love her Uncle Tommy.’

He goes quiet for a beat and takes a sip of his beer, his eyes softening. ‘I think about that girl every single day, y’know.’ 

Joel nods, staring into his own beer, and it suddenly strikes him that he’s missed the shape of her name on his lips. ‘I know.’

Tommy nudges him on the shoulder. ‘I can only hope my kid will love their Uncle Joel just as much.’

Eventually, he harrumphs, ‘If they do - I’ll think about the babysittin’.’

Tommy chortles just as the backdoor to the porch swings open with a loud creak.

Joel spots you easily, trailing one step behind Lucy. You’re holding onto a cake on a round wooden board like a security blanket, shoulders tense and eyes wide at the noise of the festivities. Spotting Maria, Lucy bounds down the stairs, leaving you hesitating at the landing, and -

You’re wearing the jeans he asked you to.

Something primal swells in the cavity of his chest, between his ribs - a pride that is distinctly male.

Tommy shouts, ‘Pin! Over here!’

Joel shifts on his feet, swallowing thickly as you approach. If your shy smile is anything to go by, he’s not the only one feeling the nerves.

His brother gives you a careful hug around the cake and plants a kiss on your cheek. When he steps aside, Joel hesitates, uneasy with having an audience, his palms suddenly clammy with indecision.

Does he… hug you? He can count on three fingers who he’s hugged for the past twenty years, and he’s sorely out of practice. A kiss is an option, but the way his eyes dart to your mouth, it’s dangerous even entertaining that thought - 

Tommy elbows him in the ribs and puts him out of his misery. ‘Why don’t you kids catch up, I think the brisket’s burnin’. Have fun tonight!’

Joel can feel the tip of his ears turning red as he stands there with his drink, one hand shoved in his back pocket, not knowing how to do this. How to entertain. Clearing his throat, he stammers, ‘Uh - can I get you a drink or somethin’?’

You give him a small smile, lips moving in an answer too quiet to reach him over the music. Rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly, he admits, ‘Sorry, I can’t hear you. I’m uh - a bit deaf in my right ear.’

You look apologetic, speaking up, ‘I’m sorry - I didn’t know.’

With a shrug, he jokes, ‘It’s ok, I’m a bit broken all over.’

You pinch your lips, and he recoginses that face - he knows that you want to disagree with him. But you hold your tongue, skirting around him to his good ear, and he stoops to close the distance, even though he doesn’t need to.

Your breath brushes his ear. ‘I’d love a drink, but I want to put this cake away first.’

‘Yes, of course - sorry, don’t know where my manners went.’ He puts his unfinished beer away and takes the cake from you despite your protests. The potluck table is packed to the brim, so he gestures towards the house. ‘It might have to go into the kitchen for now.’

You follow him, side by side with one polite body width between you, past bands of neighbours and friends catching up, the fairy lights catching your eyes and the well-kept lawn crunching beneath your soles. Unsurprisingly, you feel the weight of curious stares on your back as you go - Joel is still very much a novelty around town. Neither of you speak until he holds open the backdoor for you to slip inside.

It’s quiet in the kitchen, the muted conversation outside a low hum through the double-glazed windows. The free-standing island is already chock full of all kinds of baked goods and pudding, and Joel has to move an actual jelly castle (which wriggles precariously) to free up space for your contribution.

Dusting his hands, Joel turns to you. ‘That carrot cake?’

You nod, keeping mum.

‘It’s my favourite.’

‘I know - Tommy told me,’ you confess with a bashful half-shrug.

His warm eyes crinkle at the corners. ‘Talkin’ about me behind my back, sweetheart?’

Your breath quickens at the sweetheart, and you wonder if the thrill of the nickname will ever wear thin. Emboldened, you tilt your head to one side and tease, ‘Why? You like the attention?’

A smirk on his lips, he steps into your space, the very proximity of him stealing the air from your lungs. ‘I might if you’re not careful.’

And there you are again - with nothing more than a dozen words exchanged and even more unsaid - on the brink of something, right where you left off on the workshop floor.

‘Wanna grab a bite to eat?’

Tucked away in an intimate corner of the back porch in a wicker chair, Joel surveys the party with a seriousness that is borderline comical. 

The strategist in him clearly favours the higher ground the porch affords him so he can keep an eye on everyone and spot whoever approaches from a distance. His seat is an easy three steps to the door, an escape plan in his back pocket. For all his stillness, the intensity is unmistakable, if slightly out of place in a baby shower.

Two dirty plates licked clean are stacked on the coffee table between you, piled high with bones and leftover gravy, the delicious food sitting warm in your stomach.

‘They’re comin’ closer,’ Joel complains, taking a long gulp of his beer.

‘I guess they figure if I’m talking to you, it means that you don’t actually bite,’ you quip.

‘Will they back off if I make you cry?’

Your shoulders quake with a chuckle. ‘I think you’re too much of a gentleman to do that, Joel Miller.’

You’re taken aback by the flash of heat in his answering glance, as if there’s something he wants to say. But then, he changes his mind and leans back in his chair, one palm resting on his spread thighs, and he nods towards a couple standing close to the barbeque.

‘Who’s that over there? He lives on my street.’

‘That’s Andrew. He owns the only hot tub in Jackson.’

Joel splutters, ‘A hot tub?’

‘To be fair, it came with his house, but he managed to connect it to the water a few months ago.’

He snorts. ‘Not very communist of him to divert public resources for a private hot tub.’

‘Let’s just say Jackson is a commune with American characteristics,’ you say diplomatically.

He arches an eyebrow at you. ‘A cynic, sweetheart?’

You reply matter-of-factly, ‘We all know how communism ended.’

Fuck. He takes a swig of his beer and swallows hard. A woman after his own heart.

‘You want to keep him on your good side though. He’s really handy with electrics and the like.’

He shrugs. ‘So am I.’

You turn to him, surprised. ‘Oh?’

‘I was a contractor in another life.’

He notices your attention flicker to his hands, before you catch yourself and look away bashfully. ‘That’s good to know.’

‘You need things fixed?’ he asks, and promptly wants to kick himself for sounding so hopeful to be of service.

‘Here and there,’ you say with a dismissive wave. ‘It’s not important. It’ll hold up.’

He runs his tongue over his bottom lip thoughtfully. You have to work on asking for things, but it’s ok - he doesn’t push you. He files that away for later.

Glancing across the yard, he catches Ellie’s eye, who’s arching an inquisitive eyebrow and pointing straight at you with all the subtlety of a flying brick. He knows he should probably introduce you at some point, but he’s not ready to share your attention with someone else just yet, let alone the nosy teenage loudmouth.

Joel gives her a firm shake of the head, to which she responds with a disgruntled I’m watching you gesture.

Ignoring her for now - and knowing that he’ll pay for it later - he asks you, ‘And who’s that in the red dress?’

You crane your neck until you spot her. ‘Ah, that’s Patricia. She’s the dance teacher down at the school.’

‘Why’s she starin’ at me?’ he mutters.

You shoot him an amused grin. ‘Why, it looks like you’ve caught the fancy of our local femme fatale.’

He scoffs. ‘Should I be worried?’

‘Well, she’s been married and divorced three times since she arrived,’ you answer with a straight face. ‘The last one just disappeared. Never found his body.’

Joel stares at you in stunned silence, until you let out a poorly contained giggle. He grumbles, ‘Havin’ fun pullin’ my leg, sweetheart?’

‘Just a bit,’ you tease.

‘I liked you better when you were shy,’ he ribs.

You shrug. ‘Too late. You don’t scare me anymore.’

Glancing the other way, Joel sits up in alarm at the flutter of crimson fabric. ‘Shit, I think she’s comin’ this way.’

‘Time for carrot cake?’ you prompt.

He’s out of his chair quicker than you’d expect his knees would allow him to. ‘Let’s go, sweetheart.’

The state of the kitchen island stops you in your tracks, while Joel lets out a low whistle behind you. ‘Jackson really turned out for this party, huh?’

‘Well, your brother and sister-in-law are pretty popular around town,’ you quip.

You didn’t think it was possible, but every square inch of the kitchen island is now jam-packed with sugary confections, stacked on top of one another.

‘I can’t even find the bloody cake,’ you laugh, literally searching high and low as you skirt the parameter.

On the other side of the island, Joel tosses a dry good luck in your direction and puts the dirty plates and cutlery that he brought in into the sink with a clatter, turning on the hot water. You stutter to a stop opposite him, gawking at how his broad shoulders fill the frame of the window that sits in front of the sink, before your gaze inadvertently trails south - over the nip of his waist and the hem of his shirt skirting the back pockets of his jeans. You find yourself wishing he’d tucked the tails in.

Rooted to the spot, you watch him unbutton the cuffs on his flannel shirt and push up the sleeves to the crease of his elbows, baring his strong forearms. Your mouth goes dry despite the wine you’ve been sipping on all evening, peering at the sinewy muscles flexing and straining as he lathers the plates with an offhand familiarity, his thick fingers dwarfing the sponge in as he works the grease stains. 

Making quick but thorough work of the washing up, Joel dries the plates and then runs the tea towel over his big hands and wrists, catching you staring as he turns around. If he knows you’ve been watching all along, he lets it slide. Tossing the towel to one side, heat prickles under your cheeks when he sidles up to you with the clean plates.

The sight of this man doing something as mundane as dishes really shouldn’t get you this hot and bothered.

‘Is that cream cheese?’ he asks conversationally with a nod at your cake, which you have found sitting on top of a tall plastic caddy, a chocolate cake inside.

Having to consciously unstick your tongue from the roof of your mouth, you’re surprised your voice doesn’t shake. ‘It’s not carrot cake without it.’

‘Where did you get the cream cheese? Never seen any ‘round town.’

Almost bashful, you admit, ‘I made it.’

His eyebrows shoot up. ‘You made cream cheese? How?’

‘It’s not that big a deal. It’s just milk, lemon and salt,’ you say, trying to downplay it. Your arms are definitely not aching from the hours of straining and beating and whipping.

‘And the walnuts?’ he asks.

‘Someone I know grows it,’ you say vaguely.

Joel hums doubtfully. ‘Ain’t seen any walnut trees in town.’

Biting your bottom lip, you can pinpoint the exact moment he figures it out, brows drawing together in a frown. ‘The only ones I’ve seen are outside the walls, ‘round the north side of the gates.’

Knowing for a fact that you’re a terrible liar, you don’t even try. You choose to ignore him, idly smoothing the frosting on top with a clean knife, trying not to flinch at the weight of his gaze on you.

‘Sweetheart, please tell me you didn’t go outside just to get walnuts for me.’

‘Not for you,’ you shoot back unconvincingly, flustered. ‘I made the cake for Tommy and Maria.’

Lies. You know it. He knows it.

His shoulders stiffen, the fabric of his shirt bunching with the movement. ‘You can’t just go outside like that, y’know, there could be infected ‘round -’

‘Joel, I’ve been living here for years, I know what I’m doing,’ you argue huffily, not expecting a lecture, of all things. ‘I’m not stupid.’

He shakes his head. ‘Ain’t what I’m sayin’, Pin -’

‘Just leave it, ok?’ you reply sharply and, signalling an end to the conversation, you slice into the cake with an aggressive stab - not noticing that it is hanging over the edge of the caddy below. 

You squeak when it flips unceremoniously, and on pure impulse, you pitch forward to stop its upward trajectory, meeting it mid-air with an ominous splat.

‘Fuck!’

To his credit, Joel barely skips a beat, quickly but calmly grabbing hold of the cake board and pulling it off you, setting it down on the counter, while you gape in dismay at the damage done. 

The side of the cake that made contact with you is smushed in, most of the thick frosting now painted all over your front, from your neck down to the lovely, thin cashmere top that Lucy picked out for you for the party.

You really hope there’s a big guy up there watching, because someone might as well enjoy this mortifying brand of comedy you keep dishing out around this man.

Two seconds more, and you’re pretty sure you would’ve burst into tears for lack of knowing what else to do - but without another word, Joel takes the lead, wrapping a firm hand around your wrist and pulling you out of the kitchen. 

You gratefully let him.

It’s none of your business really, but it comforts you that Joel’s obviously here often enough to know his way around the house.

You glance around the dimly lit room where he deposited you on the edge of a neatly made bed, water trickling in the adjoining ensuite. When he returns, he has a small, wet towel in his hands. Towering over you, the low lights don’t quite reach his face, but you can see the way his gaze slips downwards, carefully, as if he’s afraid to startle you.

But he doesn’t - not even when he slides the crook of his fingers under your chin, tilting your face up and opening up your throat.

His lips twitch wryly. ‘What a waste of perfectly good cream cheese.’

Despite yourself, a laugh escapes you at the absurdity of the situation. ‘Must something always go wrong whenever we’re in the same room?’

The corner of his mouth teases a smile. ‘Never a dull moment with you, sweetheart.’

You smile back, but it falters when his eyes burn in a quiet but unmistakable smoulder. 

‘May I?’

You’re not even sure what he’s asking. But he can ask you anything in that raspy, low baritone, and there will always only be one answer.

At your nod, Joel drags the tip of his index finger down the column of your neck, and your lips part when it glides over your windpipe - pressing just hard enough for you to feel the pressure - collecting the velvety frosting as it goes. 

Then, holding your eyes, he sucks the cream cheese off his fingertip, a hum deep in his throat. ‘Delicious, sweetheart.’

You’re sitting down, but somehow, you still feel your knees give way at how he smacks his lips at the sugary aftertaste.

He looms closer, bending at the waist and for one moment of madness, you think he might lean down and lick your neck clean. 

At the prospect of those plush lips and the burn of his silvered, patchy beard on your skin, your head tilts further back invitingly. His pupils dilate and his nostrils flare, like he’s picking up on what you’re thinking, and his eyes dip to your mouth.

But he doesn’t.

You don’t even have time to be disappointed before Joel carefully gets down on one knee in front of you, one palm landing on the mattress next to your hip for balance. Knowing the state of his joints, you want to ask if he needs a pillow, but instead of your mouth, it’s your thighs that part to make room for him. His chest keeps them splayed open, and you can feel the steady rise and fall of his ribcage with each breath through the denim. 

You try to focus on your own breathing as Joel presses the wet towel to your skin and mops up the sticky mess, his face set seriously as he cleans you up inch by inch. But all you can think about is how you can feel the imprint of his fingers through the thin fabric, and how the span of his hand can easily fit over the column of your throat -

You don’t realise you’re leaning into him until he draws back when he’s done, and you tip forward, chasing his touch. His knee groans as he stands up to his full height, and he nods towards the bathroom with a wait here in his eyes.

The water is scalding as Joel washes out the frosting from the towel, but he keeps his hands under the tap, longer than he needs to. Wringing it dry, he takes a moment, wet palms gripping the cold porcelain edge of the bathroom sink, shoulders hunched over as he tells himself to calm the fuck down.

Except, he is calm. He’s held back, even when you looked at him with such straightforward, honest want that has him grinding his teeth.

Thing is, he knows you would’ve let him nudge you backwards into the mattress and crowd you between his arms, switching places the two of you were in under your sewing desk in the workshop.

He knows you would’ve let him wrap your legs around his hips, sliding his palms up the back of your thighs in those skin tight jeans - the sight of which is enough to make his head spin - and he knows you would’ve let him nip, suck, lick the tangy buttercream off your very neck. 

Not only would you have let him - you would’ve trusted him to do all those things to you.

That last realisation awakens something he’s not so sure he has a handle on. But he knows for a fact that with the whole of Jackson milling about downstairs, in the middle of his brother’s baby shower, is neither the place nor the time.

You’re where he left you when he steps back into the bedroom, your palms planted on the bed, your shoulders relaxed. The neckline of your blouse gapes loosely, teasing the soft skin of your cleavage.

Joel breaks the loaded silence with a bit of common sense. ‘You best get that top off and soak it in the bath before the stains really set in, sweetheart.’

You bite your lip hesitantly. ‘I - I don’t have anything to change into.’

‘You can have my shirt,’ he offers.

You sit up, attention piqued, when his hands move to the top of his flannel, thick fingers sliding each button out of the holes one by one. You know he’s just taking off his shirt, but you can’t help the way your jaw goes slack, watching shamelessly, the comforter twisting in your grip as you scrabble for something to hold onto. 

Joel doesn’t understand why you’re looking at him like that, but it’s so flattering to watch you watch him, eyes hooded and your tongue darting out to wet your bottom lip, like he’s giving you a fucking strip tease or something. 

Goddamn if it doesn’t go straight to his head.

A white undervest comes into view, inch by inch, as the shirt falls open, the thin fabric pulled taut at the seams over the broad stretch of his chest. When the last button is undone, he shrugs the shirt off with a smooth roll of his arms, and your jaw drops.

The undervest barely contains the bulk of him, and you’ll be damned if you know where to look first - the lean, solid line of his arms, or the effortless ripple of muscle in his shoulders - but it’s lower where your attention makes landing, and it takes you a second to realise why.

He’s not sucking in his tummy.

The swell of his abdomen sits above the top of his jeans, where the vest is neatly tucked in. You remember too well the brush of that soft strip of skin against the back of your hands when you were on your knees, cutting him out of his jeans; and then beneath you, straddling him under the sewing table. 

While there’s an undercurrent of self-consciousness in the way he holds himself, conspicuously missing is the self-deprecation that drew your ire the day he walked into your shop with a broken zipper. A tentative confidence has taken its place, which is at the same time so endearingly vulnerable, as if your reaction to the little show he gave you just now isn’t enough to assure him of what you’re thinking.

Your fingers twitch, yearning to reach out and tug him in by the front of his jeans, to untuck that vest and push it up and off. You want to snake your hands around his waist, hold him to you by the small of his back, and starting with his tummy, kiss your way across the soft belly - maybe with a cheeky scrape of teeth - up to his firm chest, his strong neck and to his lips. 

Or maybe, the calling southwards will win out. You’ll push him back to make room for yourself at his feet, nudging your way down his front with your nose, breathe him in, your hands finding his belt buckle and tugging it out of the loops instead. Never mind you've lost count of how many years it's been since you've wanted to do that, or if you remember how at all -

‘Pin.’

Your whole body jolts backwards when his voice pierces through your addled haze, low and raspy, snapping out of your sordid stupor almost grumpily - how rude of him to interrupt? - only to find him peering down at you with a lopsided smile. 

‘Get changed, sweetheart. I’ll be right back.’

Leaving your top to soak in the sink, you pad back into the bedroom in just your bra, and you stare down at his shirt laid out neatly on top of the bed.

You press your palm over where his heart would be, the flannel still warm. For one indulgent moment, you pick up the shirt and hug it to you. It smells like him - the outdoors, a crisp spring day, with a whiff of the barbeque smoke from downstairs. You bury your nose into the soft fabric, eyes closed, imagining the weight and shape of him in it. 

Even as you put your arms through the sleeves to button it up, you already know it will be hard giving it back. You leave the last three buttons undone and you’ve just tied up the too-long ends in a double knot when there’s a polite but firm knock on the door. 

‘You decent?’

‘Yes.’

You hope your face doesn’t fall too obviously at the sight of Joel wearing a shirt again, probably one borrowed from Tommy. He leaves it unbuttoned though, which is small consolation. The air hums between you with stolen glances and words unsaid.

‘You wore those jeans for me,’ he says suddenly.

The for me rolls off his tongue coated in his delectable Southern drawl and a heady satisfaction.

You decide to be brave and shrug one shoulder in a show of attitude. ‘It was the only thing I didn’t have in the wash.’

His grin makes your heart swell. Stepping out of the open doorway, his eyes trailing heat where they linger over you, he says, ‘You look good in my shirt, sweetheart. Real good.’

You bite your lower lip at the compliment, replying shyly, ‘I like this look on you too.’

‘Used to be Tommy’s uniform during our contractor days,’ he reminiscences. ‘I’m just missing the utility belt.’

Oh. You actually find it offensive that the fleeting mention of something as banal as a utility belt should get you going like this. You try to palm off a non-committal hum, but your body betrays you with a strangled choking sound that gives you away.

Joel arches an eyebrow and closes the gap between you with three long, deliberate steps, one finger skimming where his shirt meets the waistband of your jeans. He teases with a smirk, ‘What’s that, sweetheart? This contractor look doin’ somethin’ for you?’

Your cheeks grow hot as both his palms latch boldly onto your hips, and you swear you can feel the burn of his fingertips through the denim, a moan gargling in your throat as your ability to form words abandons you.

‘That a yes?’ he prompts, hooking his thumbs through the belt loops in your jeans and tugging your body flush against his, his stubbled chin brushing the sensitive crook of your neck as he speaks into your ear.

‘Joel,’ you whine, which is the best you can do right now, grabbing onto the open flaps of his shirt just to stay upright.

You feel the rumble that goes through his chest under your palms when he purrs, smiling down at you, head cocked to one side with a playful condescension that’s going to be the end of you. ‘Yes, Pin?’

Your mouth opens, but you’ll never get to find out what you intended to say, because you hear it first - his right ear is to the door - the thunder of rubber soles on the stairs, and you're lucky you manage to stumble two steps back before a deafening (no pun intended), drawn-out call of his name follows.

‘JOOOOOOELLLL!’

Ellie crashes into the doorway with all the grace of a bull in a china shop, slightly out of breath like she’s been running all over the place searching for him, already in the middle of a sentence, as usual. 

‘- also Maria says they’re doing a speech now and you’re not getting out of -’ she breaks off abruptly when she spots you, eyes wide and brows - all one and a half of them - reaching for her hairline. ‘Oh shiiiiiit.’

Running a tired hand down his face, Joel’s sigh sounds a lot like surrender. ‘Ellie, this is Pin. Pin, I’m sorry.’

You bite your lip to hold back a laugh at the resignation in his tone as the teenager wrinkles her nose. ‘Pin? That’s a weird name.’

‘Ellie!’

You smile. ‘It’s ok. Pin's just my nickname. I’m a seamstress at the Main Street Outfitters.’

Her face lights up excitedly, an open book if you’ve ever seen one. ‘No shit! I’ve been bugging Joel for a leather jacket for ages. Can I get one?’

‘Please,’ he interjects.

Ellie tucks in her chin and juts out her bottom lip at you. ‘Please?’

You demur. ‘Well, it depends on what you can trade in for it.’

‘My boombox!’ she volunteers without skipping a beat. 

Joel scoffs. ‘Good to know those three weeks fixing that piece of junk for you was time well spent.'

‘Sorry, man, but I can’t wear a boombox can I?’ she argues.

Giving Joel an amused look, you come to his rescue. ‘I’m sorry, Ellie, but we only take clothes in exchange.’ At the way she deflates, you counteroffer, ‘Or, you can come work at the shop on Saturdays for the next couple of months. Lucy always needs help out front, and you get a staff discount.’

He turns to you, protesting, ‘That’s very kind, but it ain’t necessary -’

Ellie cuts in, rushing up to you to shake your hand before you can take it back. ‘Deal! When can I start?’

‘There’s no rush,’ you reply with a chuckle. ‘I’ll get back to you next week.’

Stepping back, Ellie winks, ‘So - let’s put a pin in it for now?’

Joel groans at the terrible pun. ‘Get outta here!’

She cackles, firing triumphant finger guns at you as she retreats. ‘What? Pin liked it, she laughed! You’re no fun old man!’ 

She then pauses by the door, her eyes narrowing as she zeroes in on something smeared on your jeans. ‘Wait - what’s that white stuff on your leg?’

‘It’s cream cheese, you little shit!’ Joel snaps as your ears burn in embarrassment. ‘Out!’

She scampers out of sight, but then reverses into view, sneakers squeaking. ‘ - Are you wearing Joel’s shirt?’

‘ELLIE!’

She throws her hands up. ‘Alright, I’m gone, I’m gone! See ya Pin!’

Joel is the very picture of an embarrassed dad, rubbing the back of his neck with a wince. ‘Sorry, she’s a handful.’

You grin, ‘She’s just a teenager.’

‘You can say that again.’

The quiet seems louder after Ellie, and you restlessly pick at the sleeves. Lifting your eyes shyly, it seems the moment has passed - but Joel has other ideas.

‘C’mere,’ he hums, drawing you close again with one hand on your waist, peering down at you through his lashes. ‘This ok?’

At your nod, he brushes his thumb on your bottom lip, catching the soft plump skin, and your tongue darts out to taste him, his eyes darkening.

‘Can I kiss you, sweetheart?’ he asks, voice hoarse.

It’s been years. Years since anyone has cared enough to kiss you, let alone cared enough to ask if they could. And it’s as if he knows - you don’t know if you’ve somehow given it away, or maybe it’s just him. 

‘Yes, Joel.’

He coaxes you closer so that you’re pressed along the whole length of him. His big palms are warm and solid on the small of your back, holding you to him like he intends for you to have trouble standing after he’s done with you. 

The tip of his nose bumps into your cheek, nudging its way across and down, and your eyes slide shut when his shaky exhale grazes your gently parted mouth. Your breath hitches at the sweet burn of his beard on your jaw, fingers grabbing onto the scruff of his neck when he finally, finally brushes his lips against yours.

For a man as hardened as Joel Miller, he sure kisses soft. He steals a whimper straight from your throat with nothing more than the clever angling of his lips, the slow drag of tongue on tongue, and a growl deep in his windpipe that you answer with your own moan.

You don’t even have the presence of mind to be embarrassed when your shins knock into his, breaking the kiss with a laugh as Joel hauls you up into his chest, looking very much pleased that he’s literally made your knees buckle.

‘Sorry,’ you squeak, beaming despite yourself.

‘You really know how to flatter a guy, sweetheart,’ he answers, his voice warming you like a smokey campfire, steadying by his hands on your hips.

‘We should probably go before Ellie comes back for us,’ you say reluctantly.

Joel huffs, ‘Ain’t gonna hear the end of it if she does.’

‘Something tells me you won’t be hearing the end of it tonight anyway,’ you tease.

He chucks you gently under the chin, his eyes soft. ‘Let’s go, sweetheart.’

‘You’ve made yourself scarce,’ remarks Lucy as she ambles up to you with a glass of wine running low. ‘Where you been, hon?’

‘Had some trouble with the cake,’ you answer vaguely.

‘Sure,’ she winks at you, unconvinced. ‘If we’re calling him that.’

Right on cue, Joel strides across the lawn with three plates to join you. ‘Thought you might want some of Pin’s carrot cake.’

‘Such a gentleman, Joel Miller,’ chirps Lucy, making what can only be described as a 'thirst face' at you when his back is turned to her.

‘Thanks, Joel,’ you smile at him, letting your fingers graze his deliberately when you take the plate from him.

Saluting you with a forkful of cake, he says, ‘Thank you for bakin’, sweetheart.’

You watch as his lips close around the fork, dragging the cake clean off the slots, cream cheese smearing the corner of his mouth. He frowns, as if in deep pain as he chews, Adam’s apple bobbing when he swallows.

‘Okay?’ you ask nervously, your slice still untouched.

‘Perfect,’ he declares, already having a second, bigger bite. Knowing he doesn’t have a superfluous bone in his body, your chest warms at his words.

‘Wait a second,’ Lucy interrupts, bringing up her plate to inspect it closely. ‘Why does the cake look all wonky?’

‘Don’t know what you’re talking about, Luce,’ you answer coolly, taking a bite yourself.

Humming around a mouthful of moist crumb, the sweet carrot balanced out by the tangy frosting, you meet Joel’s eyes in the soft glow of fairy lights, and he flashes you a conspiratorial smile that makes you grin.

More notes: On Ellie - I was so so nervous about writing our resident teenage badass. I hope I've done her justice, I certainly had a lot of fun writing her introduction to Pin! If you're interested in a detailed deep dive into my process writing this chapter, I do recommend you read the Behind the Seams for this part ❤️

I also went back and forth on the tone and style of this chapter a lot. I wasn’t happy with the way it read, probably still not 100% happy. I like the way Seams and Threads were written better, but the fact is that this chapter is a very different setting and narrative compared to the first two, so I’m trying to be too hard on myself.

So, I have some ideas for where the story will go from here, but nothing concrete. As I've mentioned, I see this fic as more of a loose-fit series, so there's no overarching plot per se, but there's definitely a lot of room for future episodes of these two - I mean, they haven't even done the deed yet 😉

Comments, asks and reblogs are greatly appreciated as always! Thank you so much for reading, I'm so excited to hear what you guys thought of this chapter 😘

[gettingbyy]

10/2/2024, 10/15/2024, 10/17/2024

this post is for mouse, but you can read it, too.

i was morally obligated to use this cover photo. miss you bbg <3

10/2/2024

limerence

"a state of involuntary obsession with another person. the experience of limerence is different from love or lust in that it is based on the uncertainty that the person you desire, called the "limerent object," also desires you." --Psychology Today

"a state of mind resulting from romantic feelings for another person. it typically involves intrusive and melancholic thoughts, or tragic concerns for the object of one's affection, along with a desire for the reciprocation of one's feelings... limerence can be considered romantic love, passionate love, infatuation, lovesickness, or even love madness." --Wikipedia, Dorothy Tennov as primary source

~~~

10/15/2024

since i started this draft (awhile ago now), i've had several "breakthroughs" you could say about why i felt the way i was re: W, and it's really changed the trajectory i thought this blog would go. originally, i was just going to write about limerence and how it's affected this whole situation, but i now know it goes beyond that. i alluded to it in our call last saturday, i didn't want to go into too much detail with A there, though. she would understand what i have to say & why, and honestly i've already told her a lot of it, but i also know it would hurt her to hear all over again.

as far as limerence goes, this was definitely my first time experiencing it, or at least experiencing it to this degree. i'd asked A about how i was when we first met and started getting ~~~romantic~~~ and she said i was very chill and normal about the whole situation. the main difference from back then is she was matching my energy in a way W hasn't for... a couple months now. i just went back to the beginning of our discord messages (we traded info a couple days after we met on hinge) and god damn i think he talked to me more in the first two weeks than he has in the last month. i was getting a few hours a day of conversation, and if one of us fell asleep or dropped off in the middle of a convo, we finished it the next time someone messaged. he was messaging first, he was engaged and interested in my interests, sharing more about himself and telling stories. fuck, dude.

anyway.

HOLY SHIT i just saw a thing where apparently you can ask chatgpt to give you an analysis of your text messages with someone and it will tell you what it thinks of the interactions/relationship. brb doing this immediately lmaooooooooo

wow. i'm having a full-on conversation with AI right now lol. this is kind of wild. it's actually offering some really solid advice, and the analysis has gotten insanely fast. i'm a little scared 🙃 i'll share more about what it said next time we talk, or maybe i'll just put it straight into the server if you're interested. it reflected a lot of what you and i have talked about, and stuff that A's said as well which is pretty mindboggling.

10/17/2024

ANYWAYS AGAIN

no more derailment, i promise. hopefully.

developments since last writing: i went to his house yesterday lol. i've been trying to get him to find us time to hang out and yesterday afternoon he was like "what time are you done with work?" and i was like "between 430-445" and he was like "i'm done with a meeting at 5 and have another one at 545, do you want to hang out?" and i was like "yes" thinking we'd like meet and get coffee real quick or something and then he was like "you need my address" and i was like oh shit i guess that's happening. so it did, and it was really nice. i went over after work and he showed me around his place a little bit, i admired his plants and brandon sanderson books, and then we went on a walk to this little mini park down the street from him. it was over way too fast, but i got like 6 hugs and tbh i really wanted to kiss him the entire time but i resisted. i want him to earn it a little more lmao. i definitely appreciated him squeezing me in like that. hopefully next time we can like, hang out on a weekend or something so we're not so time-constrained.

i also noticed he's been paying like... a lot of attention to things i've said/done, more than i realized. i was razzing him about his heat (his house was set to 67) and he said "i know you don't pay as much attention to physical characteristics, but i am quite a yeti" referring to me being ace. and he asked me follow-up questions on some things that were going on at work/in life that i'd talked about when we first. i think he does like me tbh, he's just so overwhelmed/overextended from his job that it makes it hard for him to engage. i guess i'll have to decide if that's a dealbreaker for me or not, cos i'm not sure it would really get better. like, he's looking for a different job and all, but given his line of work i feel like it's just going to be more of the same no matter where he goes. what helps is that it is so much better when we're in-person, so i know there's definitely something there, it's just... less accessible than i'd like it to be. also he kissed me on the head when he hugged me goodbye and i almost died of cuteness ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

to turn it around completely and go back to the original reason i started writing this, the whole "sort of ghosting but not really but sort of" and also "not seeming to listen to my needs/asks" was super triggering in a way i didn't expect/recognize at first. i know you already know this from watching it happen in real time, but with how A's and my relationship was, it really kind of beat down on my self esteem/self image slowly over the years. with all the fighting we did, and the reasons that were usually given for the anger/annoyance, i really had myself convinced for a long time that the problem was who i am as a person. a lot of times, it felt like i was just vibing and being me and all of a sudden i'd be hit with so much anger and criticism and frustration from her because of something i said or did or some way that i was acting. i've processed and gotten through a lot of it, and it's especially helped that we've healed our relationship towards each other, but it's been so long since i had like... actual romantic feelings for someone that i didn't realize i hadn't processed that side of things. it definitely manifested as panic and hmmm... insecurity when he first started sort of ghosting, and i think that came through more than a little. A talked me through the brunt of it, i managed to hold it back (mostly) from W, which was good cos it probably would've scared him off lol, but i definitely had more than one day/night of absolutely freaking out to A that i'd said or done something wrong and fucked everything up. i even obliquely brought it up to W, asking him if i was being overwhelming or "too much," essentially, and he assured me i wasn't, but then would go back to the sort of ghosting, which set me off even more. i think the unprocessed trauma of A's and my relationship manifested in this limerence experience where i became almost obsessed with trying to figure out W's "true motives" and decoding him looking for messages that weren't there. basically, it was probably the worst situation i could have found myself in for my next romantic pursuit lol. it's been A LotTM trying to work through it, i'm not gonna lie. still an ongoing process, too. i think it was a good move to break things off with him for the brief time that i did - pretty sure i told you, but it was while we were in washington, and before i went to north carolina. i went back to him a liiiittle too soon, but... i dunno, i think i've been handling it better this time around. he's been doing better about things, too, though still not where i'd prefer him to be. i'll take the little victories, though.

all in all, i still think there's a ton of potential here and i'd really like to see it realized someday. i'm trying not to get ahead of myself, though. A's been through so much with other disappointing men, who are disappointing for different reasons, that her advice has almost turned into "don't get excited about anyone ever" lol which is too far the other direction, but... in this case, probably not a bad idea. i think i'll go ahead and publish this one and maybe start a new blog of other musings, maybe. it's a yappy kind of week i guess xD love you bbg <3 <3 <3 <3

[iviarellereads]

Wheel of Time full series spoiler thoughts on TGH 13-22

A probably semi-regular weekly bonus to my reread blog, since sometimes you realize things on reread that just make you need to yell in a full spoiler space.

I really do love how portal stones became such a thing and then were entirely abandoned. I'm not heartbroken they dropped them for the show because after TGH and the one use to get to Rhuidean in TSR, they get completely ignored forever. They're cool! They're incredibly cool and used to great effect if you can read the word "flicker" again without your eyes glazing over. But, there are other ways to work around the things they do in the books.

I will never not-laugh at Perrin thinking he's accepting his wolfbrother-ness in book 2. Oh, sweetie, this is all gonna put you right back off them again, just you wait.

Verin's first explicit lie to the reader. brb thinking about her fate again while someone mysteriously cuts onions near me.

Rand recognizes the Ogier tree song because his Lews Therin memories are starting to leak, and it's the same song of growing that they sang in the AOL.

The Trolloc monument raises some questions about whether RJ really thought out his whole thing or did a massive retcon, IMO. If the Dark won this world, why does anything in Creation still exist? I thought the whole point was that the DO winning one would win them all.

LANFEAR!~ Baby how ARE you? Been keeping hydrated? You're looking FABULOUS!

I actually kind of like both this and what the show did, changing the lesson with Nynaeve and the air-sword to Liandrin in the show. I mean, here it's establishing Siuan's connection to the Wondergirls, which IS important. And, it doesn't help that they only had limited time with Sophie Okonedo for the show. But, the Liandrin version establishes her connection with Nynaeve specifically, and the way they're set up as foils.

Sheriam! How odd your trajectory shall be. Odd enough, in fact, that as of my writing this Ali of the Wheel Takes podcast still thinks Sheriam's the double-agent, not Verin.

Lanfear and Rand's shirt. Another point the show took directly from the book and just gave a little twist.

Innkeeper Madwen comes back during the Cleansing, though in someone else's POV to observe the Choedan Kal activation. Curiously, Caldevwin only appears in this book, I would've thought he'd be a prime candidate to join the Band later.

AAAAAAHH so besides Adeleas and Vandene, THE BOND TRANSFER SETUP. I have a strong feeling they're going to skip it in the show, Mo will release the bond (that's what she asked Alanna about in season 1, after all) and give Lan a reminder to live for Nynaeve, who will make sure Rand completes his destiny. If other parts of the story stay intact, Mo will have seen herself and Nynaeve at Shayol Ghul with Rand if all goes right, AND it mirrors the way gentling/stilling works, where the loss of the Power means you have to find another reason to live. Stepin couldn't find another reason to live, but Lan already has one, if he's willing to seize it. I don't know exactly how they're going to do this, but I really feel they're going to skip the Myrelle of it all and have the only unconsenting bond be Alanna's to Rand.

I'm still not 100% on what it was Vandene said that Mo thought was important. Perhaps that the seals are weakening more widely? Or her not knowing about the Vileness with the Reds after the Aiel War.

[sh0ek0]

after hours (part 2)

please find the other parts via my masterlist or the #sh0ek0 tag, I'm having some trouble with my posts not showing up in the tags and I think the links are messing this up

genre: angst, smut, dark content, kinda all over the place content warning: 18+ !MINORS + AGELESS BLOGS DO NOT INTERACT! mentions of alcohol and drug use, name calling, toxic relationship, abusive relationship, violence, emotional abuse, choking, rough!megumi, slapping, threatening with a gun, Russian roulette, manic kinda episode, I should honestly stop romanticizing this kinda behavior, still: probably more but I am new to this pairing: Megumi x Reader word count: about 6.5k

summary: After Megumi beat up Choso at Yuji's and his houseparty, you're left drunk, high and confused. You start looking for him and remember an incident from your past before you sneak out of the apartment to meet up with your abusive ex, trying to rekindle your toxic relationship.

I'm so sorry this second part took me so long. Again: I don't want to talk myself down and I love writing, it's so much fun but I am very critical of myself and I really think this is trash compared to all the other amazing writing on here. So, THANK YOU SO MUCH for bearing with me and hyping me up. Every single like I got on 'heartbeat' really made my day <3 (I am terrified of posting so brb logging off for a few days help)

recommended songs: Formula - Labrinth / The Hills - The Weeknd / After Hours - The Weeknd / The Zone - The Weeknd / Streets - Doja Cat / Wicked Games - The Weeknd

You stumble through the open door onto the roof terrace. There are people staring at you and some of them seem to recognize you - you knew people were talking and you were old enough to just not care about that kinda shit anymore. They haven't been through what you've been through and if they decided to judge you? Well that was on them.

Right now you needed to find him. Megumi reacted the way he did because he loved you. You knew that. You pass by a table and a few lounge chairs and recognize the people sitting there from your college lectures. A girl, you remember her name to be Yue, waves you over. 

"Y/N! Hi, are you alright?" she asks and you can hear a tiny bit of concern in her voice as you stumble and bump into one of the chairs. 

"Hi, uh, yeah 'm fine." you answer and shoot her a smile, fumbling with the sleeves of your dress before you drop into the chair you just bumped into. Your head was spinning while you were desperately trying to process what had just happened inside but it was too much, it was too loud, too many people, too much booze. Everyone around you seemed to have the time of their lives while you were stuck inside your mind.

You reach for the half-empty bottle of vodka that was on the table in front of you and pour yourself a glass. It would definitely not help you to get any clearer in the head, but it would calm your nerves. Or at least you could just escape this mess for a few more minutes.

You put the glass to your lips and down its contents before filling it right back up. You can feel the stares of the guys sitting next to you. You never bothered to speak to anyone in your lectures and you didn't even know their names but apparently they seemed to enjoy seeing you in this state.

Under normal circumstances you wouldn't give them a single glance and you would’ve snapped at them for staring at you like this but now, as drunk as you were, you didn't even notice how far your dress had ridden up, or the spilled liquor on your cleavage. The wet fabric clung to your boobs, exposing you without really exposing you.

"Hey, slow down." Yue laughed as you down another shot, taking the bottle out of your hand. You look at her before leaning back in your chair, closing your eyes for a brief moment. 

"Listen I actually don't want to bother you any longer," you frown, unsure what to say next "just 'wanna know if you saw Gojo or Megumi I- I am looking for him." you say, unsure if Yue could understand you over the music.

Yue looks at you. You know she understood you because you can see pity in her eyes and you immediately regret asking her in the first place. You told yourself that you didn’t care but you still hated that everyone around you had their opinion about you and your relationship. No one dared to say it out loud, but everyone thought the same. Even your friends. 

"Well, I don't know where Gojo is but I saw Megumi passing by just when I came out here," She moves closer to you to pull your dress down, glaring at the two guys that were staring at you. 

"I think he left." She looks at her hands, obviously searching for the right words to say to you.

Yue leans over to you. You weren't exactly close but apparently most people on campus knew about the ups and downs in your relationship. People really liked to talk. 

"Y/N I guess your friends are really worried about you," she says gently, trying not to cross your boundaries. "You should really stop looking for him - I mean everyone saw the bruising on your neck-" 

Well, so much for not crossing boundaries. 

"Megumi would never hurt me." you protest, cutting her off.

"-people say he threatened you with a gun after an argument escalated." Yue carefully put her hand on your leg and you flinched.

"That's bullshit." you laugh, getting flustered. How could this even have spread around? You told nobody except Maki. 

"That’s not what happened." you whisper.

"You don't threaten someone you love with a gun." Yue said in a sharp voice. You look at her, completely thrown off guard. 

"Yeah and I guess you don't stick your nose in other peoples fucking business." you hiss and lean on your hands to lift yourself up out of the chair, a little bit wobbly on your feet. You grab the bottle of vodka from her hands and stumble in the direction of the terrace door.

You feel tears well up in your eyes as you remember that day a few weeks ago. It happened in your dorm room again, you just came home from another lecture. Grabbing you from behind in complete darkness, Megumi covered your mouth with his hand to keep you from screaming as he pressed cold metal to your temple. You will never forget how utterly and absolutely terrified you were. 

You will never forget the look he had in his eyes when he threw you against the wall and made you face him. You could see on his face how much he enjoyed having absolute power over you.

***

"You fucking stalking me now?" he spat at you, holding you against the wall of your dorm room by your neck. Your throat still hurt from the last time he did this to you. 

Megumi had an old revolver in the other hand and pointed it at your head. "What the fuck did you think you were doing last night? You are fucking crazy, Y/N." Your body was shaking, he sounded so angry it completely scared the shit of you.

Would you let him treat you like this for the rest of your life?

"You were fucking some other bitch last night you fucking asshole," you screamed out, cutting him off. "I fucking know it! Stop bullshitting me I fucking heard you through that door." You started crying.

"You telling me this after you sucked off some random guy at the party you were at? You fucking kidding me?" - "We just kissed an-and I was drunk-" you started explaining but got cut off as Megumi pulled you towards him by your neck before slamming your head against the wall. You let out a muffled groan.

He was still holding the gun to your temple and you were scared shitless that it would go off. 

”'We just kissed and I was drunk'” he mimicked your voice and you cried out in pain. Your head hurt, your face was scrunched up and your eyes closed. 

”You are a fucking whore, Y/N, and you don't fucking own up to your actions. You’re a fucking slut and you think you deserve to get treated like a fucking princess.” Megumi spat at you.

You started bawling. 

"At least that bitch wasn't as fucking annoying." Megumi huffed. 

"I really fucking hate you." You yelled at him. 

"Leave me alone, stop touching me." You felt a headache coming on, your head was throbbing and tears were flowing uncontrollably down your face. "I hate you."

How could you keep on doing this to yourself? You slowly came to the realization that nor you were scared of him neither you were scared of him being violent. You were simply scared about the fact that no matter what he did to you, you couldn't stop loving him.

"I know you do." Megumi answered.

He took his hand off from around your neck and you felt the cold metal leave your skin as he slowly lowered the gun. Your pulse pounded against the spot where the barrel had just been pointed at and you see the usual blank stare returning to his face. 

"You're abusive and a fucking psychopathic maniac." you cried, trying to catch some air.

He just kept staring at you with emptiness in his eyes, watching tears stream down your cheeks. 

"I hate the way you're making me feel, Megumi." you added quietly, staring at the ground.  

"I know." he said. 

You sniffled, tears still streaming down your face.

"Can't you just leave me alone already?" you said, rubbing the bruising on your throat with shaky hands. You didn't even believe yourself and the words that came out of your mouth seemed so far away. As if you were standing next to yourself and listening to some other person talking.

"That's what you want me to do?" he asked in a calm voice and lifted the gun that was still in his hand. 

No you didn't. 

Megumi opened the chamber of the revolver in his hands. You saw that it was indeed loaded when he dropped the six bullets into his hand and slipped five of them in his pocket. He then placed a single round back into the gun and spinned the cylinder with his thumb.

You stood there in silence and watched what he was doing.

He lifted the gun and held it against your forehead. You closed your eyes, unable to stop your body from shaking. You begged him to stop.

"Megumi, stop, you’re scaring me, please stop that." you pleaded. "Just leave me alone, please stop-"  

Not until you felt him pull back the gun did you dare to open your eyes. Your cheeks were wet with tears and as soon as you opened your eyes, his gaze met yours. His dark eyes looked so empty as he put the barrel to his own head. 

Your heart stopped once again.

And then he pulled the trigger.

You squealed and instantly flinched but you could only hear a silent click! - the gun didn’t go off. 

Suddenly it dawned on you what he was up to. Even if you didn't quite want to believe it, in the condition he was in right now he would have been capable of anything. Even of something as crazy as this.

And you were so fucking scared of how far he would go this time.

"Megumi- stop p-please STOP." you sobbed.

He was manic. Completely out of his mind. 

"You asked me to leave you alone." His voice eerily calm, as always. He closed his eyes and grimaced, pulling the trigger again. 

Nothing. No loud BANG! just a faint metallic click!

Watching him almost put a bullet in his head a second time had traumatized you. If he hadn't managed to do that by now, he certainly did at that moment.

"Megumi- PLEASE- please stop this." you screamed hysterically and reached out to him, your hand now touching his chest. 

"Please stop, I-I love you- I love you so much- p-please stop I don’t want you to leave me, please-" you wailed. Your body followed your hand and you leaned against him, head buried in his chest. You felt so weak, barely able to hold yourself on your feet. You sobbed and cried into his chest, staining the fabric of his sweater with salty tears. 

And you could feel that his body was shaking as well. 

You didn't dare look up at him. After a minute that felt like an eternity you finally felt his arm wrap around your waist, stone-cold metal now pressed against your back. 

Megumi’s chin was resting on top of your head and he slowly pressed his lips to you hair, inhaling your scent while planting kisses.

"Next time you ask me to leave you I’ll kill us both." he whispered in a cold voice and you nodded, barely noticeable. 

"I love you." he added and you closed your eyes.

He loved you. That was all that mattered to you. 

You could never love another man, not even if you wanted to.

***

You made it back inside on shaky legs, your heels were way too high for the amount of booze you had in your system by now. You screw off the lid of the bottle in your hands and take a sip. Looking around you spot none of your friends except Yuta but he didn’t seem to notice you. 

He’s sitting on that very couch you were sitting on with Choso just a while ago and at a second glance you can see that he’s making out with your roommate. Maki didn’t seem to notice you either, as she was completely distracted by Yuta’s lips and his hands all over her body.

Under other circumstances you would have been quite excited about this turn of events - you knew how long Maki had been crushing on him. And you also knew that Yuta was the one who fell first, given how he acted around her and how he looked at her like she was the only woman on the planet. 

But now you were way too drunk and way to invested in finding Megumi to care about anything else. You push past a few people while drinking from the almost empty bottle, trying to find the front door.

After taking a few wrong turns you eventually find yourself standing in front of the door through which you had entered the apartment a couple hours ago. And just as you put your hand on the doorknob, you feel someone snatch the bottle from you.

"What the-" you start and turn around, looking at pink hair and a deeply concerned face. 

"What are you doing? Let me get you home." Yuji was completely sober again, looking at you with a raised eyebrow. 

"I really need to get som' fresh air Yuji, please jus' leave me 'lone" You slur, struggling to stay on your feet.

Yuji held the empty bottle in his left hand and grabbed your wrist with his right to keep you from falling. 

"Y/N, please, don’t go out there by yourself. You can either sleep in my room or I’ll get you home." He tries to pull you away from the door but you stand your ground.

"Please just let me gooo." you beg, impatiently stomping with your feet after finding your balance again. "Let me go." you insist and try to pull your arm away from him.

"I just don't want you to get hurt, Y/N" Yuji says and you have literally no idea on how to get out of this situation. It was not like he would just let you leave like this.

"Listn' I really don' need a babysitter and I have an Uber waiting for me, so please just lemme' go." you lie to him, hoping he would be satisfied with that. 

"Bullshit, you did not call an Uber. That’s like a five minute walk, we’re right next to campus." he busted your lie. "What are you really up to, huh?" Yuji asks.

Choso and Yuji indeed lived right next to the campus. You had always asked yourself how they were able to afford this huge apartment and you figured that Choso not only consumed the drugs he hid here by himself - but also dealt them. That would explain at least a few things, for example all the people who constantly went in and out of here.

After a while of not answering him, Yuji finally lets go of your wrist and looks at the ground. 

"You're looking for him, don't you?" he asks after meeting your gaze again. The look in his eyes made you feel so terrible and ashamed. 

"Listen, he’s my best friend too, but he just beat up my brother and that look on his face? I don’t know Y/N, he looked like he was capable of anything in that moment." You tried to avoid his gaze, but no chance. It seemed like he pinned you to the wall with his eyes alone.

"I'm not looking for him- I'm-" you start when suddenly you get cut off by a few guys that were calling out for Yuji. As he turns around for a split second you immediately take advantage of him being distracted to open the door and slip outside. 

You quickly walk in the direction of the stairs, your head spinning but you try to stay composed and take one step after the other before finally stumbling through the door downstairs onto the street. 

The sky was completely black, not a single star in sight and the only light was coming from a few dimly lit street lamps. Thankfully it was still relatively warm outside.

You take a few shaky steps away from the building, still a bit afraid Yuji would follow you. You were in no condition to run from him. 

For a while the sound of your heels on concrete is the only thing you can hear until you notice the faint buzz of your phone in your purse. 

MEGUMI: "Meet me outside. I'll wait for you." Your heart starts beating faster. 

The text was from about 30 minutes ago so you figure that you didn't have a signal upstairs in the apartment. You look up from the screen and turn around, trying to find where Megumi was waiting.

You flinch a little when suddenly a parked car on the side of the road starts its engine. 

You recognize the black pickup truck and as the lights inside light up for a brief moment, you see Megumi sitting in the driver's seat. Your vision is still a bit blurry and your head’s dizzy but your legs are already carrying you towards the car. 

He really expected you to come looking for him.

You open the car's door and slip into the passenger seat without saying a word. The lights inside are dimmed and you can only see his pale, slender fingers on the steering wheel. His dark clothes swallow him up and the hood of his sweater is pulled down over his face. 

Megumi did not say a single word either, his face turned towards the windshield in front of him. 

"Y/N!" you hear someone call out for you as you close the door behind you. Looking through the window you spot Yuji at the entrance door of the apartment building. He's holding the open door and watching you get into the car. 

"Your dog’s already looking for you, huh?" Megumi asks without expecting an answer and starts the truck. He drives off before Yuji could even think about running after you. 

Yuji's eyes were full of concern and yours were full of guilt as you turn to face him, but you quickly lower your gaze. You couldn’t stand looking at him. You knew how desperate he must feel right now.

At this point you wouldn't blame your friends if they never spoke to you ever again. The hours they spent worrying about you, the evenings they spent trying to talk you out of your relationship with Megumi. 

It was all for nothing.

You slip out of your heels and throw them to the back of the truck. Megumi looked at you, one hand on the steering wheel. He watched you while you were rubbing your aching feet, trying to ease the pain from walking in these goddamn high heels for hours. 

With his free hand he stroked your thigh, motioning you to put your legs in his lap. 

"C'mere." you hear his deep voice and you hesitate for a second before you stretch your legs out towards him. He starts massaging your freshly pedicured feet with one hand, the other one gripping the steering wheel tightly. His eyes were focused on the road in front of him. 

You close your eyes for a moment and enjoy the sensation of his touch, your whole body was aching and this right now was a blessing, no matter how awkward the situation was.

After a few minutes you feel the car speeding up. You knew that Megumi was probably still drunk but you also did not really care about it. It was not a big surprise to you that he would drive drunk and it was also not the first time he did this. 

For a really long time neither of you said a single word and you were just enjoying his touch on your skin, without having to fill the silence.

"What were you thinking?" Megumi was the first to break the silence, eyes still fixated on the road. His voice was icy and it made you shiver.

"What d’you mean?" you ask, pretending to be clueless. Your head starts spinning a little as you open your eyes again.

"Don’t play dumb." Megumi huffed, looking over to you, directly into your eyes. "I mean you, sitting in Choso's lap, behaving like a slut in front of everyone." 

"Mhm." you answer, turning your face away from him. You switch on the radio. 'After Hours' by The Weeknd starts playing, probably from some playlist you made for him. 

"Technically, I wasn’t sitting in his lap." you say. You're not sure you would have had the courage to say that if Megumi hadn't been busy driving. 

Even though you’re unsure of what to say next, you didn't want to submit to him again. You did not want to make yourself so small anymore.

"Shouldn’t the question be: Why the hell do you even care?" You shift your weight and put one foot up on his thigh, stroking his crotch through the fabric of his pants. 

The last bit of alcohol in your blood gave you at least a little courage.

"It’s not like we are together anymore." you say teasingly as he looks over to you again. 

Megumi grabs your leg, pushing it back down roughly. You wince, as his grip on your ankle is a bit too harsh. 

"Ouch." you protest and he lets go of you. You send him an innocent smile and tilt your head to the side, as you continue to stroke his thigh with your foot. You feel a bulge growing in his crotch just seconds later

"So why does it matter to you?" He doesn’t answer. You see the grip of his hand tighten around the steering wheel, but he doesn’t say anything. Instead he keeps on caressing your feet and legs, trying to push them down or hold you still but you don’t let him.

The two of you just sit in silence again, listening to the music without talking to each other.

"It matters because I don’t want to see that fucking bastard all over you, acting like he owns y-" Megumi says after a while but you cut him off.

"We’re not together anymore and you don’t get to beat up anyone I am involved with," You snap at him. "Cut your fucking bullshit Megumi, I am sick of this." 

You don’t know how to feel. This is all so confusing - a big part of you is annoyed with him and so hurt and heartbroken, but the other part, probably even bigger, wants to nestle in against his chest and leave as little space as possible between the two of you. 

And he knew that, too. That smug piece of shit knew you inside out, and acting was not exactly your strength.

"Then why are you here?" he asks and glances at you, both hands on the steering wheel again. 

You think for a moment, look over at him, then out the window again. You skip to the next song and loll your legs in his lap now sitting on your side and resting against the back of the car seat.

"I guess I make terrible life choices and besides, you almost hospitalized my one chance at some superficial sex tonight so you have to deal with me now." You say, trying to sound almost bored. Or  at least unbothered.

Megumi swallows, eyes still fixated on the road. You figured that this was not what he wanted to hear but to your surprise you hear him chuckle seconds later. 

Well, as you had already noted: he knew you too well.

"Nah, don’t bullshit me." he sneered. "You started looking for me as soon as you arrived at that party. I saw you disappear with Yuji immediately after." 

Megumi ignored your little show of pretending that all of this left you completely cold and you just wanted to end up in someones bed. It was a show after all.

"And I saw you getting out of that bathroom, holding hands with my best friend." You cross your arms. "Wearing the dress I bought for you. " 

"I doubt that you wanted Choso to fuck you tonight." Megumi huffs, his deep voice making your heart race. 

"I doubt that you wanted anyone else’s attention than mine." He was so right.

After a few more minutes of sitting in silence with the music playing softly in the background and Megumi driving off into the darkness, you roll the window all the way down. He looks over to you as you lean your head out slightly, hair waving in the breeze. 

You take a deep breath and lean out a bit further, supporting yourself on the window frame. As you arch your back a little, your breasts start to perk up and you close your eyes to fully enjoy the cool night air blowing in your face. Besides the music and the sound of the engine it was so quiet outside. The world was asleep and somehow that comforted you.

You feel Megumi’s gaze on your body. His hands act upon his thoughts as he starts stroking up your calves, over your thighs and further up under your dress. You lean back inside and your eyes meet, but as always you couldn't quite read his expression. 

You slowly pull your legs out of his lap and rest your feet on the dashboard. Without breaking eye contact you lift yourself up out of your seat, pulling up your dress a little and taking off your panties. His eyes widen for a second but he seems to try his best to stay composed.

In your perception, you didn't have much power over him. Not after he managed to read you like an open book once again. He was right about everything he said, even if you wish it was different. 

You only went to that party because you hoped something like this would happen.

Megumi would probably not make that statement - even if it didn't seem like that to you, he knew you could bring him to his knees with the blink of an eye.

He swallows hard, turns away for a moment to look at the road and looks right back at you again. You feel his hand run across your thigh, squeezing gently.

You meet his gaze with the most innocent smile on your lips before you throw your panties in his direction. 

Megumi's lips twitch as he takes a look at the pair of panties lying in his lap. 

"I knew I was right." he says with a smug grin on his lips. You notice his eyes immediately scanning the road for an exit and you giggle as the car takes a sharp turn off into some run-down construction side.

"Well, you better hurry up, so you can make up for the amazing sex I would’ve had if it wasn’t for you." you purr and look up at him from big doe eyes. 

He glances over, looking you up and down 

"I will definitely make you regret saying that out loud." Megumi hums before he brings the car to a halt in the shadow of an unfinished building. 

You roll the window back up and climb over to him without thinking twice, straddling his lap in the drivers seat. He grabs your hips to bring you into the right position and you smile down at him before you lower your lips to his neck. 

"Promise?" you ask and feel his hands move all over your body before sliding under your dress, pushing it up and squeezing your ass with both of his hands while you’re leaving hickeys on his pale skin.

"God, I missed that feeling." he groans as you grind down on his lap. You can feel how hard he already was while dampening the fabric of his pants with your soaking wet pussy. You pull back for a moment and look into his eyes. Just seconds later your lips crash down on his, wet and sloppy as you hold his face with both of your hands.

His hands move further down your ass and you moan into his mouth when his fingers reach your slick heat, sliding through your wet folds. He teases you, circling your clit and your clenching hole lazily with two fingers. He deepens the kiss before your lips part with an audible pop! and you’re left to catch your breath. 

His lips wander along your jaw and the side of your neck while your hands move from his face down his neck and over his chest, further down to his pants. Megumi’s hands are back on your ass to lift you up a little so you can try and open up his belt to pull down his trousers. With a hasty movement you relieve him of his pants and grind down on him immediately after.

You flinch a little when you feel his leaking tip brush against your sensitive clit. Letting out a quiet whimper you start grinding on him again, sliding his hard dick through your wet folds. He pulls you into another kiss, gentle at first before he nips at your bottom lip and then bites down hard. You pant and slide your tongue into his mouth, making him groan in return.

You pull away and look deep into his eyes, arms now wrapped around his neck. Megumi pulls you up again by your waist, positioning his cock at your wet entrance. You cry out in pleasure just as he pushes the fat tip of his cock inside you without giving you any time to adjust. 

"Ahh, 'gumi! Fuck-" you moan. You lift yourself up again, the sensation of his dick filling you out being just too much to handle for you right now. Megumi looks at you, a crooked smile on his lips. Hands on your hips and lower back he pulls you closer to him, you can feel his hot breath against your neck.

"Too much?" He breathes into your ear. "Guess you didn’t fuck around after all." 

"Good girl 'been waiting for me." he whispers, caressing your back with one hand before he thrusts up deep into your tight pussy, bottoming out completely. You squeal but have no chance of escaping him as he holds you in place with both of his hands.

"Ah- Fuck! Fuck- Megumi-" you whine, throwing your head back in pleasure. 

"Shit- How are you so fucking tight?" you hear Megumi growl though clenched teeth as he holds you down for another moment to keep you from moving. Finally his grip on your hips loosens a little and you start grinding up and down, picking up the pace. Still, you felt how much he hated not having full control over you so he kept on guiding you with his hands. 

He watched your pussy swallow his cock whole, going so deep and hitting spots inside you that made you cry out in pleasure and pain, his thick girth stretching you out just right. 

Megumi is quick to push your dress further up your waist to expose your boobs, watching them bounce up and down as you keep on riding his dick. You moan out in pleasure while picking up the pace of grinding on his cock, making him pant and groan against your soft skin.

His gaze and hands wander all over your body, having your soaked cunt crush down on his cock even harder now that you were free to move however you liked. Megumi’s getting lost in watching your cute pussy bury him deep inside, creaming and slowly forming a white ring around his shaft. 

Your head’s still thrown back in pleasure, eyes rolling to the back of your head from the sensation of your tight hole clenching around his thick girth, your moans and gasps and groans and the sound of skin slapping against skin fill up the car. 

He watches you in awe as you fuck yourself on his cock exactly how you need it, whimpering, moaning and breathing so hard as he puts a thumb to your clit, drawing harsh circles that make you flinch. 

"You’re so fucking beautiful-" he groans, trying to catch his breath and coming back to reality as he notices your moans getting needier and your breathing getting harder. 

"'Please 'gumi- need you to-" you babble, your grinding on his dick gets sloppier and after a few more lazy circles Megumi's hands move to your waist, squeezing the fat on your hips on his way up.

One hand on your waist, the other moving up, grabbing and squeezing your boobs before wrapping around your neck, he holds you in place as he roughly starts fucking up into you. 

Your thighs were already shaking, his hand around your neck still squeezing tightly. You’re gasping for air while now being fucked at a brutal pace.

"Oh- Fuck- just like that Megumi-" you moan. "Please d-don’t stop- Just like that-" The quiet pleads leave your lips and you close your eyes, desperately trying to hold yourself up by supporting yourself with your hands on the window frame and steering wheel.

"You think Choso would’ve made you feel like this?" Megumi sneered, already leaving bruises on your neck by how hard he was squeezing down his hand. You try to shake your head but instead you can just let out a quiet whimper.

"Huh? You think he could’ve fucked you like I fuck you?" he spat, loosening his grip just as you begin to see stars forming in the corners of your eyes. You feel his hand on your cheek and a second later you hear a loud slap! followed by a stinging sensation on your face.

"I asked you a question." he growls, his thumb on your lips, pressing into your mouth. You begin to suck on it instinctively, your eyes half closed and your strength slowly leaving you because he was pounding so hard up into you.

"N-No- only you-" you whimper, voice breaking.

"Good girl," he praises "be a good little slut and keep squeezing me so tight." His thumb leaves your mouth and you fall forward a bit, losing the support of his hands. Your walls clench around him, turning you into a moaning mess against the hot, sweaty skin of his face.

"Fuck- such a good little whore for me, huh?" Megumi growls into your ear while your head rests against the side of his face. He’s still at a brutal pace, his thrusts getting even deeper and you can’t help but whimper and cry on top of him.

"P-Please- Can’t take n’more" you sob while he fucks into you relentlessly, making you cry out in pain and pleasure. 

"Please- Please let me cum-" you whimper, tears starting to form in the corners of your eyes. 

"Look at me." Megumi orders and you try to lean back again, supported by his strong arms holding you upright. 

"F-Feels so good." you cry, squirming and wiggling under his touch, overwhelmed with the delicious feeling of his dick pumping in and out of you. He’s hitting all the right spots while your walls are squeezing him so tight. Megumi holds you in place, hands on your hips and lower back, not letting you move a centimeter to the side. 

"Fuck- doing so good- now cum on my dick, be a good girl for me." Megumi groans, not taking his eyes off of you for even a second. Tears roll down your cheeks while you look deep into his dark eyes, black strands of hair sticking to the damp skin of his forehead. 

With every thrust you feel the knot in your stomach getting tighter, with every brush of his shaft against your puffy clit you feel yourself getting closer to the edge until you feel that sweet release washing over your body with a final harsh thrust. Your lewd moans and your tight pussy clenching around his cock throw him over the edge just seconds later and you feel him pumping his load deep into you with a few feral groans escaping his lips.

"F-fuck- keep squeezing me so tight," he breathes into your ear, pressing your body as close as possible to his while you lazily continue to move up and down on his dick. "Good girl." Megumi moans. He holds you tight and you bury your face in the crook of his neck.

For quite a long time you both are just trying to catch your breath, entwined in each others arms. The truck’s windows are steamed-up and only the shallow light of the moon falling through the windshield makes it possible for you to see anything at all.

"You’re something else." Megumi whispers after a while, his soft cock gliding out of your sticky cunt and his hot breath hitting your skin. He quickly pulls up his pants and pulls down your dress before he pulls you back into his lap, your body trembling under his touch. 

"I missed you." he says and you feel so exhausted that you can only nestle into his chest, listen to his heartbeat and close your eyes, while he strokes your back gently. 

"Let me stay the night. I’ll get you home." he whispers and plants a kiss on top of your hair. 

"Not if you’ll leave me again." Your voice sounded so delicate and fragile, he had to pause and swallow before he could answer.

"I won’t." he says quietly. 

"Please don’t leave me again." you repeat yourself and you feel a single tear forming in the corner of your eye that gets wiped away by Megumi’s hand caressing your cheek. 

"I promise." You look up at him and he pulls you into a deep kiss. "I love you." you say quietly.

He doesn’t say anything.

"I still love you." You feel so vulnerable, it’s almost making you sick. "I don’t care about us fighting or fucking or obsessing over each other - deep down I know that I’m only capable of loving you."

"You’re the only one I want." You add in a low voice.

"I know." You hear Megumi’s muffled voice, his face is buried in your hair.

If only he could see the damage he did to you. How dependent you were, how much he was hurting you. 

If only you could see how much you were pouring oil on his fire, how obsessed you were with him. 

There was no happy end for the both of you and deep down you knew that.

[duckymcdoorknob]

Um hello I’m kinda new here… I found your emergency requests on someone else’s blog and I really need one right now. My mom wont stop making comments on my body. It makes me feel really bad about myself all the time. Can you please write Takemichi, Chifuyu and Mikey comforting an s/o with body image issues? Thank you if you do write this!! If not, or if it’s too much, please just trash this!

Of course my dear.

Thank you for trusting me with this. I know ALL about this one.

(Brb manifesting Mikey’s)

Please don’t hesitate to come in my dms if you need any help at all.

CW UNDER THE CUT: mentions of bodyshaming.

𝑇𝑎𝑘𝑒𝑚𝑖𝑐ℎ𝑖 𝐻𝑎𝑛𝑎𝑔𝑎𝑘𝑖

Takemichi is the world’s best boyfriend, at least in your opinion.

Some days he’s aloof and snarky, but others he’s sweet and kind as can be.

Luckily for you, the day that you needed him most, he was himself.

Your mother had just made another comment on your figure, and you couldn’t take the harassment anymore.

Changing into a large hoodie and sweatpants, you left your home in an instant. As you ran anywhere but back where you came, your field of vision was blurred by tears.

You settled by the riverbank, huddling your knees close to you while you sobbed. You wished wholeheartedly that you were different, that your mom was different, that your life was different…

To your horror, you heard a familiar chiming voice yelling anguishedly behind you.

“Mikey! Stop wiggling so much! You’re gonna fall off the bike!”

“Let’s go to the riverbank, Takemitchy!” The other voice chimed in response.

Your eyes widened as you furiously wiped them with your sleeves. You tried desperately to hide your sniffles, taking a few deep breaths.

“Wait, someone else is here.” Your boyfriend’s voice said with gentleness, “Mikey, Draken, I think they’re crying!”

You began to cry harder as footsteps came toward you. The last thing you needed was for your boyfriend to see you in the state you were.

“Hey! Are you okay, what’s your name?” He gently touched your shoulder.

You immediately flinched away, choking out a “please don’t touch me.”

Your lover immediately recognized your voice. “Wait, (Y/N)?”

“Takemichi please just go…” you mumbled as you hiccuped.

Takemichi instantly took his hand away. “Sweetheart what’s happening? Who did this to you?” His tone was much darker. He sounded ready to kill.

“No, no. Takemichi I’m not hurt please just… just drop it.” You averted your gaze as you sunk inside the oversized clothing.

“I can’t drop it when you’re feeling like this.” The blonde replied, scooting closer to you.

“It’s just me being stupid. I’ll get over it I swe-“

“Yo, Takemitchy. Mikey’s waiting.” Draken’s annoyed voice suddenly sounded.

Your lover looked at you, at the bike where Mikey sat watching a butterfly flutter about, then finally at Draken.

“Takemichi I’m okay.” You reassured him.

“Mikey’s gonna have to wait, this is much more important than a bike ride.”

“Takemichi!” You hissed, yanking your hood down, “Why would you say that? I told you I’m fine, go be with your friends!”

“(Y/N) they understand.” Your lover tucked a strand of hair behind your ear with a smile, “So please… tell me what’s bothering you.”

Your lip wobbled as you pulled the hood back up . “Do you really love me?” You asked in a mousy voice.

“With all of my heart.” He grabbed your hand and kissed it.

“Even though I look like this?”

“(Y/N) what do you mean?”

“Even though my body looks like it does? Even though I’m not the perfect partner that you actually deserve?”

“(Y/N) (L/N). Look at me,” Takemichi commanded, tilting your chin upward with two fingers. “I didn’t fall in love with you for your body. I’m not in this for sex, or your body alone. I am in love with you.”

“I’m in love with the person who always texts me to make sure I get home every single night, who sings to me when I get scared, who always makes me a little snack before I go to meetings.” He ended his last statement with a chuckle.

“What I’m trying to say is that you never have to worry about me leaving you. So please don’t cry, and please don’t ever think that you aren’t enough just because someone doesn’t like the way you look. Because if it’s any consolation, I sure as hell think you look incredible.”

You wrapped your arms around your lover’s neck and hugged him tightly. He reciprocated, chastely kissing the crown of your head.

“How touching. Can we go get ramen like you promised?” Mikey called from the bike.

You whined “Aw man they heard all of that?”

“Doesn’t matter. The only person who should care about what you look like is yourself. And I hope that the way you care is by living your life the way you want to live.”

Takemichi stood to his feet, offering you a hand. “Now then. Does my darling partner want to join me and my friends for some ramen? We can share a bike.” You nodded while smiling.

“Who said that I would pedal Mikey?” Draken growled in a low voice.

“Well I’m sure as hell not trusting my partner on the back of your bike.” Takemichi replied, draping an arm around your shoulder.

𝐶ℎ𝑖𝑓𝑢𝑦𝑢 𝑀𝑎𝑡𝑠𝑢𝑛𝑜

Ever since Chifuyu had been beaten by Baji, you avoided telling him anything.

You just didn’t want to burden your lover with anything when he already had so much going on.

So the day that your mom’s comments put you over the edge, you didn’t know who to talk to.

You put on your baggiest clothing and retreated to the playground near the school.

As tears leaked out of your eyes you desperately tried to wipe them.

You closed your eyes to try and level yourself, but the sobs just wouldn’t stop. You hated the body you had and you desperately wished you had a different life.

The sound of chains creaking next to you alerted you. You gasped as your eyes widened in shock.”

“Hey, calm down love; It’s just me.”

You sighed in relief as you heard the familiar voice. After registering who it was, you hung your head low and averted your gaze. “How’d you know I was here?”

“I got a text from Mitsuya. He said he saw you crying and you were walking toward school. I figured you’d come here.” Chifuyu noted, kicking his legs a little bit on the swing.

“Great intuition.” You mumbled, “But it’s okay. There’s nothing to worry about.”

“That’s the biggest load of bull I’ve ever heard.” 

“Chif-“

“No don’t try to lie to me.” He demanded, “How am I supposed to leave my partner alone knowing that they’re in pain?”

“It’s really nothing to pitch a fit about.” You replied sheepishly.

“If it’s nothing, then why are you crying so much?”

Chifuyu stood from the swing and knelt down in front of you. He took both of your hands in his own and stared into your teary eyes.

You tried to rip your hands out of his grasp, “Chifuyu stop. Don’t touch me please.”

With pain in his eyes, your lover released your hands and watched you curl in on yourself.

“(Y/N) I’m begging you. Please tell me what happened.” You heard the fragility of his voice and couldn’t help the guilt.

“You don’t deserve to have to touch me. Why are you even with me? When I look like this above all else…”

Your boyfriend stared at you with his beautiful cerulean eyes. “(Y/N) will you look at me?”

Your teary gaze finally met his. “What?”

“You” he began, “Are my favorite person in the world.”

“Chifuyu-“

“And I love you for you. I don’t love you only for your body, and I’m not in this for sex. While I do find you absolutely stunning, your body isn’t the reason why I fell in love with you.”

“I fell in love with someone who makes me laugh until I snort, which I didn’t even know I could do by the way! I fell for someone who helps me with my English homework, because God only knows I’m awful at it. I fell for the person who’s never against getting a gas station slushy with me, especially every Friday at two in the morning.”

“What I’m trying to say is, I love you. I love you to absolute pieces. I don’t care what you look like and I never will. I think you’re easily the most gorgeous person on this planet, like genuinely.”

“I love you too Chifuyu, thank you.” You got off the swing and immediately slumped down into his embrace.

Your lover held you for a few moments, rubbing his thumb in between your shoulders and kissing your forehead occasionally.

“Hey Chi’?”

“Mm?”

“Speaking of two am slushies…”

“Oh hell yeah. Don’t even finish that sentence.”

You giggled as you both got to your feet. Chifuyu took your hand and you both rushed to the nearest gas station for your weekly treat.

𝑀𝑎𝑛𝑗𝑖𝑟𝑜 (𝑀𝑖𝑘𝑒𝑦) 𝑆𝑎𝑛𝑜

With a boyfriend like Mikey, you were constantly worried about whether he liked you or not.

He always had people fawning over him, so you never felt truly reassured, no matter how many times he did so.

So when your mom had made her usual comments, you were hesitant to reach out to Mikey.

You had changed into your baggiest tee shirt to hide your figure and rushed away from your home.

You sat on the sand of the beach in the dead of night, the crashing waves mixing with your sobs.

You had nothing to protect you from the harsh breeze that froze you to the core.

Suddenly, a gasp rang through the air. Your eyes widened as you prayed that no one noticed you.

Within a few seconds, a fluffy article was draped across your shoulders.

“Sweetheart what are you doing out here in the cold?!” It was Mikey. He was holding your shoulders gently as he sat down next to you. “Takemitchy told me he saw you were crying and headed this way… I wish you would’ve told me.”

“Mikey please don’t!” you cried out as you wiggled away from him, “Please don’t touch me.”

Your lover recoiled immediately, eyebrows upturned and lip quivering. “Who hurt you?” He whispered.

“What?”

“Who did this to you…?” His voice broke as he tried to fight his own tears, “Because I swear to God I’ll kill whoever the hell made you afraid of being touched.”

“What- Mikey no! I just…” you turned your head and listened to the crashing waves against the shoreline.

“Please (Y/N)…” he murmured.

“Do you still love me?” You asked as a tear rolled down your cheek, “Like genuinely?”

“Of course I do, sunshine. I’ll never stop.”

“You love me even though I look like this? Even though my body is just-“

“Stop right there.” Mikey demanded, “Will you please let me touch you? I won’t hurt you I promise.”

“I… I guess.”

Mikey began by gently grabbing your hands. “I love your hands.” He stated, “They’re soft, gentle and always know just how to patch me up when I get hurt really bad.”

He traced your arms with his fingertips, “I think I love your arms the most. They hold me tight whenever I really need to feel loved. They also hug my friends to help them feel loved too.”

He moved down to your stomach, “I love your stomach because it always tell us when we should get a treat. It’s never ever wrong, since every time is treat time.“

He placed a hand on your thigh, “I love your legs. They take us to such incredible places and keep us moving whenever times get tough. They look amazing in long pants and shorts, hell they look amazing in everything.”

Finally, Mikey moved to cup your cheek, “I love your face. It’s so beautiful and makes the best expressions when you’re happy. It has the most beautiful eyes, cutest nose, and softest lips.”

Mikey pressed a chaste kiss to your lips, wiping your tears with his thumbs. “I love you, and every part of you. I don’t want to date you only because I want to have sex or whatever you may be thinking. I want to date you because you make me feel happy no matter what.”

You choked on a sob as your lover pulled you into an embrace. “I love you too, Mikey.”

Mikey held you wordlessly as he rocked you back and forth. The two of you listened to the peaceful sound of waves crashing along the shoreline.

When your sniffles subsided, Mikey asked you in a tiny voice, “Say (Y/N), does your stomach say it’s time for dorayaki? Mine surely does.”

You giggled and nodded, “Mine does too.”

—————♡︎✞♡︎✞♡︎✞♡︎✞♡︎✞♡︎✞♡︎✞♡︎✞♡︎✞♡︎—————