#brap

[tubbiecustard]

from sugestion heehoo heehoo

[rootytootypie]

Bending over farts are literally the most embarrassing ones outside of sharts (which I don’t count) or accidentally in the middle or sex (which those usually involve contorting or bending of some sort; in missionary it theoretically seems less embarrassing because your partner is pretty far from your butt). But bending over to pick something up and blasting like you’re a human whoopie cushion with no control? 🫣 Ironically it’s my favorite fictional scenario but I hate when it happens to me in real life.

[shebadfuckk]

I can’t wait for the weekend. I need to go ride

[club-touge]

Gem

[squid1nkpasta]

heyyy if you like ace attorney and have a fart fetish you should join our ID gated (to ensure no kids get in) hangout server !! verification is easy and we have a whole channel dedicated to filth kinks. we're super supportive and discourse free. hop on in!!

we also have PK for DID/osdd accessibility !!

[frameposting]

ayye we know what he sniffin

[slcr303]

[slashedout]

Fart

[tubbiecustard]

prgre s s s. s ss

[rootytootypie]

Super curious about Batman- 😳💨🫘❤️(ships could be with anyone or people he's close to working with-ex: Superman)

💨: Bruce isn’t a gassy guy, by all means. Probably a 3/10. He only gets gas at charity galas and if truly forced to eat on the run; otherwise, his diet is extremely refined. But what he lacks in quantity, he more than makes up for in quality. If he fully lets it out, it’s loud as hell and smells like death. He can make them silent, but the stink almost gets stronger. He definitely resorts to any and all means of muffling the sound and smell, and generally takes it to the bathroom, spreads his cheeks, and muffles it with toilet paper. He totally has charcoal lined underwear, regularly takes mints for more than just breath problems, and even has a soundproof room in his mansion for total privacy.

🫘: Hoo boy…do NOT let this man around fattening foods. Other than beef and poultry, Bruce’s stomach is unprepared. Anything rich, filling, creamy, sugary, or generally having empty calories is gonna cause some rumbles. Salad dressing other than vinaigrette gets to this man. And fast food? The other reason other than poison gas the Batmobile has a high-tech automated air filter. It’s also programmed to filter human gas, something other Justice League members are thankful for for their own reasons.

😳: 12/10 on the embarrassment scale. He’s mortified if he farts in front of Alfred, much less anyone else. He has to emotionally decompress after every time he’s forced to let a silent one go, even though he almost always gets away with it.

His most embarrassing moment? Hands down, it was during an at-home interview with Vicki Vale. He had given her a tour of Wayne Manor (at least the parts on the dummy schematics used to ward off nonexistent suspicion). He made jokes. Charmed her and the photographer she brought along. Told a funny story or two about his antics in Europe (that he had invented after rereading The Sun Also Rises). Then it happened (in slo-mo, as Bruce remembers it): she dropped her pen. He went to pick it up. *BWWWWAAARRRRRRTTT!* And his rear decided to play the salvo of last night’s charity dinner - particularly the stuffed mushrooms.

He jerked back into a rigid stance, cleared his throat, and said, “Excuse me.” This took a gargantuan amount of effort, as the last time he’d undeniably passed gas in public had been in his nursery years at a Montessori school, and as soon as eyes went toward him, he’d run out of the room in tears, which he vaguely felt the urge to do now.

To her credit, noticing Bruce’s tomato red face, Vicki said, “We’ll leave that off the record” and changed the subject to the first edition Dickens novels in the study.

❤️: Bruce never intends to let anyone get too close. He never plans to let his guard down. Flatulence is his definition of too close. Especially when, despite his intentions, he starts romanticizing his boyfriend, then having breakfast in bed with him, and then telling stories about his childhood. Damn it, his emotional walls should be too strong for even Superman to break through, and yet the guy has sprinted through them like they were made of foam bricks.

Why in God’s name did Clark have to find out from Alfred that Bruce’s secret favorite dish is escargot, and then surprise him with it for dinner on his birthday? Did Alfred want him to embarrass himself? Because he was definitely close. Especially after Clark decided to gave him a deep tissue massage as part two of his birthday celebration.

Why were Clark’s hands moving towards his butt? Why wasn’t he yelling out stop, knowing Clark would immediately cease? Why hadn’t he begged off the massage and invented a reason to go on patrol?

All this went through Bruce’s mind as, with his active stomach gurgling and his back yielding to Clark like a pie crust, he relaxed too much and so did his hold on his gas.

*Prrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrt!*

“Good boy,” Clark said. “Now I’m sure you’re relaxed, Bruce.”

“Ha ha,” Bruce said joylessly. “Please forget that.”

“No, I’m serious,” Clark said. “I’m not teasing you. I’m just glad the massage is working. I’m sorry, Bruce. Please don’t be embarrassed.”

“I literally just farted in my boyfriend’s face,” Bruce said. “How can I not be embarrassed?”

“Because I love you, and would never hold something so natural against you,” Clark replied. “Also…”

And then Bruce’s sweet, doe eyed Midwestern boyfriend did something truly shocking.

*BBBBBRRRRRRRRFFFFFFFFFRRRRT!*

“Excuse me,” Clark said, blushing. “I think the garlic sauce made me a little gassy too. I didn’t mean to let out such a monster. I only wanted to make you feel better about your little slip. Less…alone in your mortification.”

Bruce sat up, turned over, and gave Clark a passionate kiss. “You’re the greatest love I’ve ever known,” Bruce said. “Thank you for being you.”

And that night, Bruce didn’t feel claustrophobic as the two men passed gas throughout the night, but instead an incredible sense of warmth and comfort he’d never imagined.

[abe-the-otter]

tiktok rizz party turkish quandale

Nuh uh

[evananderson]

hello world

[mudcricketpatrol]

📸 @estefaniatayar #girlsthatride #girlswhorace #atvgirl #quadgirl #atvriding #quadriding #yamahaatv #yamaha #sportquad #brap #foxracing #roxy #roxygirls #alpinestars #maxistires #sandhill #sanddunes #sandriding #girlsinboots (at Argentina) https://www.instagram.com/p/Cnmra6wJDVg/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[memes4amelia]

Brrr ap

Who sent you? 

(Via: @laurenncoll)

[weredyke]

BBBRRRRRRRRDRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAP!!!!!!!!!1!!!!11!!

[thenightlymirror]

I’m sure I am the worst at this, but there’s this thing where people use social media just to explain to you the explicit text of how you as the consumer are supposed to interpret their PR, and there isn’t some kind of meta-point about the fact that you are constantly being messaged at, it’s just having some coworker or fb friend re-iterate the message. Just in case you didn’t hear it, or god forbid, understand the messaging. Yeah I got it thanks. It’s like you suddenly have Agent Smith in your office.