#boy none of this was funny at the time but looking back on it 2016 was a fucking ride

[darknight3904]

A preview to part two of the Gojo x Zenin!reader I wrote.

Warnings: None

September 2016 (Gojo: 26 You:25)

"Shut up Megumi!"

Tsumiki's room door slamming is loud enough to rattle the entire house.

"Not again..." Gojo groans from his spot on the couch.

Today was his first day off in months, he wished you were here and snuggled into the couch with him but instead, you were off on some mission with Nanami and that kid he was training, Ino was it?

Gojo wished you were here so you could deal with whatever the Fushiguro siblings were fighting about now. You had always been better at diffusing the situation that he was. After all, he'd often end up instigating more problems since Megumi was so funny-looking when he got mad.

"What's going on now?" Gojo asked the dark-haired boy

"Nothing. I just told her that her hair was weird looking today. Where is-"

"She's out on a mission with Nanamin. I'll be handing dinner tonight so go start your homework and apologize. " Gojo said

"You sure you can handle that without burning the place down?" Megumi asked

"Of course I can! I'm the strongest sorcerer alive...I can handle a little dinner."

"Goodnight, Zenin-san!" Ino called out the window as the car drove away

He really was a lovely boy, strong too. Nanami had trained him well. The walk up the sidewalk to your shared home with Gojo and the kids was your last sliver of peace though as you could already hear yelling.

What horrors awaited you on the other side of this door?

"Megumi, would it kill you to help out?"

"Yeah probably. That pot is gonna overflow."

Your feet quickly carry you to the kitchen where Satoru is standing amongst...well you're not really sure what he's trying to cook.

"What's going on?" You ask

"You're home!" Gojo called excitedly, "How's Nanamin?"

"He's great. What's all this?" You ask gesturing to a pan that's been burned so bad its normally white bottom is black with charred food.

"He's trying to make dinner. He's been trying for almost two hours." Megumi says

"Satoru you're 26, can't you cook anything?" You ask as you pull your hair up, ready to take the spoon away from him

"I can cook. " He defends

"Frozen chicken nuggets don't count." You laugh

"Hey!"

Gojo watches as you toss what he was working on, to be frank, he's not sure what he was trying to make at this point. It had started as pork katsu and then evolved into a disaster.

"What's wrong now?" You ask as you rummage through the fridge.

"I wanted to have a nice meal ready for when we got back from your mission. Like you do for me." Gojo says

You can hear the pout in your boyfriend's words.

"It's alright, Satoru. It's the thought that counts." You assure him

"Next time you go away, I'm going to make the best dinner ever." He declares, resting his chin on your shoulder as you fill a pot up with water.

"Well, Nanami and I have orders for Friday...so I'd get learning, Satoru." You smile.

"Perfect. Friday night, my dinner will be even better than yours. I'm going to go pick out a recipe on my laptop." He declares marching off to who knows where.

"Can I ask you a question?"

"Of course, Megumi." You say, the boy rarely asked questions, so you were always excited to answer them when he did.

"Can you get someone else to cover your mission on Friday? I think if you leave him alone with the kitchen again he might blow us all up."

The rest of this is out now. Check it out here

My Masterlist

[marengogo]

Silver Lining - What If #6: FOR(ever) ↔️ YOU(ng) - Jikook the Musical

Good Morning - by Verbal Jint  [10 Years of Misinterpretation Part I]

[Music is a very big part of my life and I’m MOSTLY INCAPABLE of writing without music, so I just thought I'd share what I am listening to while writing this]

🐺 — 🐺 — 🐺—

Dear Ladies, Gentlemen and Distinguished Enbies, welcome to a one day only “showing” of FOR(ever) ↔️ YOU(ng) - Jikook the Musical. Tonight I shall try my best to narrate a cute little story, which has various songs as centre plot developers; hence a “musical”. Taken individually, all these events may seem absolutely disconnected, and with no relevance to each other. However, as I started to collect them, they turned out to compose quite the neat little story about two boys their love for music and perhaps each other? So grab a snack, and a thin hat everyone, sit, relax and enjoy the show.

SCENE 1: FOR YOU

This story brings us all the way back to almost 8 years ago, to be precise, the year is 2015, the date is August 18 and during BTS’ Japan Official Fan Meeting Undercover Mission in Osaka (this fan meet went on from the 13th to the 20th of August), while playing a game, JM suddenly loses consciousness and falls off stage. He is taken to a hospital immediately and as soon they are explained the situation, Big Hit Entertainment tweets the following:

 TRANSLATION:

The same day, JM himself goes ahead and posts the following

TRANSLATION:

Fans panicked. Obviously VERY LUCKILY FOR ME: I WASN’T AROUND AT THE TIME. As for his members, I am sure they were worried out of their minds, so much so that one particular member would express his relief perhaps at having JM safe and sound back with them, right on their very stage. This member was JK, whom two days later (August 20), on the last day of this event, as they performed "For You", walked right by JM and stopped for a couple of seconds, looking at him while he was singing part of the song’s first verse. For the rest of the song, it would become quite visible how JM couldn’t help but smile (cutely).

SCENE 2: I KNOW

So, even though we do not have an elaborated tale of what all the members must have felt exactly, it is safe to say that JM’s accident had a bit of an effect on JK’s mind. So much so that, a couple of months later, while he was playing around as Romeo & Juliet with JM, on the shoot-set of Season Greetings 2016, JK suddenly “refused” to play with JM because, and I quote:

Let’s fast forward to June 2016, this time we are in Paris, and the boys decide to start a VLIVE just before performing at KCON and, at the beginning of the live, we only have VMIN in sight. They start to talk about RM & JK’s new song “I Know” and, as the two are actually in the room but off camera, Tae asks  bribes JK to sing a bit of the song. We still can’t see JK, but, while Tae looks away JM looks straight into JK’s direction as the latter proceeds to sing

🎶Know you love me, boy

So that I love you🎵

… The expression on JM’s face is priceless the things I’d give to know how JK sang this to JM. ANYWAYS, RM eventually also joins into a funny rendition of the song and when they are done, VMIN resumes talking to ARMY and though we will never know for sure what caused it, perhaps JK’s expression, or the lyrics, or the fact that it was JK or all things together, or none of the above, BUT JM did stumble his way through trying to describe the song, in the words of Tae, JM suddenly seemed to be a bit “nervous” almost as if someone had suddenly serenaded him out of nowhere.

Another example at JM being flustered actually happened a month earlier to the Paris trip, at the ISAC where the Tannies needed to sing a song called Hand in Hand and while they are practising (at minute 0:57) I believe that JK might have change the lyrics to “promise me” but don’t quote me on that!, which made JM react in that way Joon and Hobi on the other hand; LOOOL 😬.

Basically, 10 months had effectively passed since the “For You Incident-Serenade” and it feels as if JK might have caught on to the fact that the easiest way to get a flustered reaction from JM is to sing to him. Perhaps he had to sing at him a couple more times off camera, in order to confirm this theory AS ALWAYS; WE WILL NEVER KNOW but from this moment on, whenever he’d find a chance to, it would seem like JK would take the topic at hand and find a way to romantically sing it at JM.

SCENE 3: A DAY LONG AGO

It is finally February 2017, and love isn’t the only thing in the air, in fact, on paper actually, on February 7, JK graduates high school. He is visibly hella excited, and though he goes to the ceremony alone, all his members show up, and afterwards, on their way to the restaurant, VMINKOOK share a ride.  For the most part jikook are doing most of the talking and at a point in which JM is talking a very eager looking JK suddenly starts singing, at JM, the beginning lyrics from A day Long Ago (오래전 그날) by Yoon Jong Shin.

AND, For the very first time on-camera, JM does his very best not to react. We can still see the slight hint of a smile, but for the most part, he’s successfully brushed it off and he is very quick at keeping the topic of discussion on track.

This might have thrown off someone like your-truly, but JK? No, the boy likes a good challenge. JK nor was discouraged, nor did he try to force JM to listen to him, he just went along with JM. We are talking about an almost 20 year old boy who, for the greater part of 2016 (that is when he turned 19, which is the age you become an adult in Korea) has been trying his mighty best to have his hyungs, and JM in particular, understand that he is now an adult and that he has been for quite some time. But hyungs gonna hyung, immaright? Sorry JK…

SCENE 4: BEST OF ME

Now, I don’t know what happened in the months between JK’s graduation and the 1st of October (2017), but there seems to be no on-camera attempt of JK even attempting to sing at JM, in fact, if anything, JK has been trying to appeal in different ways. For example, JM-Encyclopedia JK makes an appearance, or I’d rather not call you hyung makes a strong comeback. Regardless, for the first time, at the Fan Meet in Goyang (1st October, 2017)  JM is singing at JK lyrics from the “Best of Me” where he substitutes the word heaven (cheonkook) with Jungkook (he would do it again on episode 28 of RUN BTS, which would be broadcasted on November 7, 2017, but telling from the hairstyles it was probably filmed around the same period as the Goyang Fan Meet).

We are now halfway through the movie, and though our heroes have gone through a series of back-and-forths, they haven’t really encountered any “conflicts” per say; namean? Sure, JM is the one doing the singing now, because maybe he is trying to get JK’s attention. Had he lost said attention? Had something happened between the two of them? Or had their relationship evolved to a point in which he was just trying to return some of the musical energy he’d received thus far? WE WILL NEVER KNOW unless they tell us that is. But what we know is that a good 30 days after this, JK would take JM on what we now know to be, thanks to Beyond The Story, a healing trip to Tokyo, which would give birth to the first and most famous gcf: GCF in TOKYO. 

SCENE 5: BOY WITH LUV

Upon returning from Japan the two of them feel closer. It looks like they had the time of their life and they can’t seem to be able to talk about anything else. Basically they appear to be quite smitten with this shared experience, and perhaps, with each other? In addition, while still being the maknae, JK is sort of shifting into being more of a protective entity for JM and though JM tries his best to keep him in that designated maknae-slot, he also can’t help but indulge in the “offered protection”. 

They are now spending a lot more time together and this fact is not lost on some people in their environment, regardless of whether said people want to admit it or not. Particularly in 2018 (where, before even getting to the infamous Nampyeon-Namchin December )

we are in Hamilton, September 22nd, on their Love Yourself Tour. As they perform Attack on Titan, during the song’s break, JK pulls a For You Serenade-typa thing, but this is not 2015 and JK is no longer 17. This time, he focuses on JM for the whole part, hair pushed back and all, and for the first time in a while JM is visibly flustered, he silently giggles, turns towards ARMY, and also pushes his hair back. JK’s satisfied expression as he got JM’s attention says it all.

Yeah, this is not the same JK. He is not a boy who is relieved to see his bandmate's being well and alive, or trying to use the situation to his advantage in an awkwards manner. NO. This is a 21 year old, who’s just come back from the trip of a lifetime, this right here, seems to me, to be a boy with luv. 

Speaking of which, fast-forward a couple of months, May 21, 2019, they are in California, and as they are getting ready to perform on The Voice, Memories 2019 will show us how, for the first time JK substitutes words of a song while singing at JM. He substitutes the word “Love is” with “Jimin” while singing Boy With Luv at JM, who acts like he is ignoring him completely but actually proceeds to sing along. Who knew there was an art in serenading and beginning serenaded? Jikook circa 2015 🤡

Indeed, there is nothing stronger than a boy with luv, let’s not forget that a couple of weeks prior to this (May 5th to be exact) Rose Bowl-gate did happen. Well, up to this point, all seems very flowery and very peachy; what could go wrong, right?.

SCENE 6: THE TRUTH UNTOLD

AND, here we are, the part right before the end of the “musical”. We all know some sort of “big conflict is coming” and at this point some might just turn off the movie and leave it at a happy place but the majority will probably just brave it through to this day I start watching Baz Luhrman’s Romeo + Juliet and stop the movie right before the part whenthey take the fake poison, nobody dies in my Romeo + Juliet, thank you, bye! . Let’s brave it through.

Things are going quite well in Jikook world. The Tannies were given a break for the first time ever and thought JM left to go explore the world, he made sure to travel all the way back to Seoul to spend JK’s birthday with him, just to then travel off again; dedication. BTS then takes off to go and shoot Bon Voyage 4, and amongst the many things JK goes up a mountain and comes down with snow for JM; devotion. The two of them are living life, all while diligently performing touring as well.

Thus comes the end of the Speak Yourself tour, Seoul, October 26, 2019. The vocal line performs The Truth Untold and it happens, not only do JK and JM turn to face each other as they sing the last part of the song, but they also change “And” to “But”.

Jikookers who notice are left speechless, but jikookers weren’t the only people who noticed. That and a series of “jikook moments” throughout 26th-29th of October, made October 30, 2019 quickly roll by and the following happens:

I can’t even imagine what it must have felt to have experienced THAT. To be honest I don’t even want to think about it, but then actually is more like “I can’t believe they actually fucking did that…”. BUT, guess who won the IDGAF war?:

JIKOOK

I bet many thought jikook would perhaps “tone it down”, but they kept being themselves. They kept being as affectionate, annoying, close and “flirty” as per usual, I mean some time in 2020 we got 👇🏾

So yeah, I suppose, love will always win.

SCENE 7: GOOD MORNING

It’s now 2023. All the boys are getting ready to go to MS, as a result, they are giving it their all working on solo projects. Jikook has finally managed to become a bit more private, and this isn’t as a consequence to what happened in 2019 (if not we wouldn’t have had that hickey-incident). A lot has happened since then, but I believe that, perhaps, as things got more serious, and as they got older, their relationship naturally progressed into something more mature, personal and deeper in significance. For example JM associating JK with the song Young Forever

*The writing in the shoe where JM is sticking his tongue out says Jeon Jungkook.

a song that holds a very special place in JM’s heart; tattoo-worthy special. 

There is that, the adult side … Aaaand then there is also JK & JM quietly spending 4 days together in NYC/CT, in the midst of JK’s debut (perhaps getting content ready?) and there is also JK half naked in bed trying to bait JM into doing a live with him and starting off the bat with singing at JM the initial lyrics from Good Morning by Verbal Jint.

🎶Good morning – that’s what I texted you

I think I’m into you, it’s dangerous 🎵

… I suppose old habits die hard.

THE END

Always respectfully yours 💜🫰🏾

Marengo.

DELETED SCENES:

THROUGH THE NIGHT by IU

MAKE IT RIGHT by BTS

DAY vers.

NIGHT vers.

ROLLIN’ by BRAVE GIRLS:

[rosewoodconch]

RWCH Readathon 2024: Day 3

Undercover Princess- Chapter 8

Right! Actually into the school year now. Lets go to classes and absolutely fail at useful communication!

I really like that the uniform can be changed to better fit the students personality. Ljke there s the tartan of the hiuse in skirts and pinafores but also the trousers

I wonder why none of the guys wear the tartan trousers?

Micky wears the shorts i guess, maybe he wears longer version of them in winter

I want a fic wear lottie actually just straight up tells them she spied on them from behind the mirror and their reaction. Someone please

Mr trigwell is such a good name for a maths teacher. And the slenderman reference is just so... 2016/2017

Connie is incredible for that.

Ellie offering to tutor lottie made me swoon so hard as a kid. Especially followed by "i can think of a few things..." GIRL LIKE WHAT? WHAT IS THE INTENDED IMPLICATION?

I am also requesting art of the rosewood cafeteria and also the ivy one from the last chapter please they look so pretty in my head i just cant art.

Shes also being so dismissive of ollie already. Why on earth wouldnt she even tell him oh my god by the way these girls think im a princess????

Raphael being so shit at lying then saying that shes a bad liar is comedic gold i love that boy

Hes an actor for gods sake. Hes doing it on purpose i swear

Lottie at this stage where shes sassy and a lil smug and faking stuff is funny and cute. Im dreading the "caus eim the maravish princess" scene because that is another level of fake entitlement.

Lola is the most iconic ever and no one should ever trust her with a secret ever. How did they make it through this series without them spilling every secret ever

Back to my barbie bullshit. Micky is Porscha coded (barbie charm school again)

Can she not just show them her id? Her passport? Something???

This scene makes me laugh so genuinely and so much its only rivaled by that one scene in I think PiP?

I love that this scene actually feels like theyre real characters. They arent just fitting whats ideal for the story they feel like theyre real and making decisions and trying (and failing) to keep secrets and stop themselves from laughing and it makes me really happy

This is the first time i think we really get to see all their personalities shine but still meld together to see how they are actually friends

[the-batacombs]

Okay I've been READING COMICS finally. I've not had anything on my TV watch list (that I wanted to watch), and I've had a lot of free time, so. Comics.

Green Arrow (1988) Vol. 1: Hunter's Moon, Vol. 2: Here There Be Dragons

I'm going to be honest I liked these way more than I was expecting to. The very prominent politics of this one are very wobbly compared to the Adams/O'Neil GA/GL, but it's a little more modern in its sentiments. Surprisingly progressive on gay men and East Asian characters, surprisingly regressive on Native American and Black characters. The colouring had a lot to contribute to that read. Grell's pacing is solid, his ongoing here has a lot more light in it than in Longbow Hunters, and his Dinah kind of dips in and out of being a really strong character and disappearing again into a kind of generic female cattiness. Art on this one has that wonderful late eighties/early nineties quality where the linework is starting to explode in what's creatively allowed. It's very pretty. Planning on picking up Vol. 3 as soon as I can track it down.

Green Arrow (2001) Vol. 1: Quiver

Okay, I understand why people like this one. It's a deep-cuts, I would have been lost if I hadn't been reading at least a little chronologically through GA comics, and it's very very good. It's stuck a little in the nineties curse re: art, and I got so thrown by he-looks-white!Connor Hawke it's almost funny, but the pacing is amazing amazing. Very few comics are paced this well, where something substantial happens every issue in an organic way that moves the story forward. Also extremely politically stuck in its time period; if Grell was worried about China and Iran and Cold War/post-Cold War politics, this one is concerned with 9/11 and what's going to become War on Terror talking points. Shout-out to having more Tim Drake mentions than several recent volumes of Batman I've read where he's theoretically Robin.

Green Arrow: Stranded

This one is cute. 10/10 for kid Oliver's green hoodie, it's fantastic. This one strongly resembled Batgirl: Shadow of the Bat in tone, where they're preserving what they can about the canonical origin story but kind of glossing over the details and hoping the cute art will carry the violence past concerned editorial/parental eyes. It's fun, it's about a twenty-minute read and Oliver's crazy archery glee plus the pressure of having to take care of other people really strengthen the comic. It does a nice little loop where Oliver doesn't really have to learn anything about himself except that he can be brave when he needs to be, but his dad has to learn something about him. (Sometimes GA writers talk about the stranded-on-the-island era as a kind of "life lessons" era and it drives me bonkers. So this was nice.)

We Are Robin (2016) Vol. 1: The Vigilante Business

This comic...really lost me. I really liked it conceptually and as a Gotham/batbook. The art was fun and dynamic and the Duke voice was excellent crazy fantastic. But regarding the actual narrative, it moved way too slowly. Even after six issues I'm not sure what the actual drive of the story was, and none of the dangling threads were resolved. I had really wanted to read this, but it's definitely pushed Vol. 2 and Robin War farther back on my list, because this was more frustrating than entertaining to parse. Not helped on my end by really not having any context for what was going on in New52 Batman; this is potentially better if you read it in a row with the subsequent volumes, but I wouldn't know yet.

The Flash (2016) Vol. 19: The One-Minute War

Okay this was...not exactly what I thought it was going to be, because it didn't really deliver on the promise of the premise of a One-Minute War. It was, however, extremely fun silly comics story, and it completely sold me on reading the rest of the Adams Flash run. Bart Allen my boy Bart Allen. <3 Also Irey! And Jai! And Linda! And Wally! Really crazy Flash speed force stuff that made the sci-fi part of my brain go whizz-bang-whirr with joy. I read all that GA and decided I was definitely a batbook fan, but I read this and seriously considered that I could become a big Flash fan. Anyway, I had a lot of fun with this one. Strongly recommend although it's Vol. 19 and if you don't know all the characters it won't make any sense and I think it will be much less fun. It's a character story. (On which note, I wish it had tried to be less girlpower. Stronger Linda/Irey characterization here would have done a lot for it.)

Nightwing (1996): Brothers in Blood

I can't believe I found this, I was literally so psyched to read this. I love Jason as a villain, he's just somehow the perfect combination of compelling antagonist character and so, so lame. Everything about this plot was ??? but the tentacle guy coming out of nowhere was a huge plus. Jason should've got to keep the tentacle powers I'm just saying. Dick's just very Dick Grayson in this thing, his life is a mess, it was surprisingly tonally coherent but also very much...not my tone? The last Nightwing I read I think was Taylor's and the shift between the perfect TT apartment and Dick's definitely illegal loft here, with a pretty redheaded girl being mildly snarky in both, is...weird. The more things change the more they stay the same? He also looks about fifteen years older here than he does in TT's run, which is just funny. Kind of confirmed for me that Nightwing (1996) is almost definitely a very good comic that I probably won't enjoy that much. And that Jason's Actual Villain Era is fantastic and I should hunt down every appearance. He's so much more interesting before he became a moral conundrum for Bruce to be sad over.

[demonsfate]

i definitely agree with you on Jin being a good boy again. Whether they explain it accurately or not it's up for debate but looks like they are at least trying to fix the mess. Funny thing is I've seen many Kazuya stans say it doesn't make sense and Jin shouldn't be the "Hero" lmao. Oh well!

I am glad they're trying to fix the mess. I'm glad that Harada had finally conceded and just let Jin be a good boy. Because upon looking up stuff, it's funny - none of the writers wanted Jin to be bad, they argued that he had to at least be doing a Wrong thing for a Right reason (the writers fucked up that execution, but I can't really blame them too much for the position the director put them in). And Jin's voice actor didn't like it, either. Funny enough, Isshin is so insistent on Jin being a Good Boy, he apparently doesn't even like DJ LOLLLLLL. Which is hilarious because even I still love DJ, haha! But anyway. Harada apparently once stated that aside from Heihachi, Jin was his favorite character. I think this was many years ago - maybe back in 2011. But in a recent interview, he does say he relates to Kazuya more than Jin. Whilst that may not indicate if he still favors Jin, buut... it does make me feel if it's possible that Harada doesn't like Jin as much when he realized he's forced to keep him as a Good Boy. Because I'm pretty sure Harada seems to enjoy villainous characters more, or at the very least - ones that are more "problematic."

Another interesting thing is he used to speak about how the Mishimas were actually like his own family - how he and his family constantly fights amongst each other. Which is fucked up. Like when you create characters like the Mishimas to be inspired by your family, you must have a fucked up family. BUT. He has also said that after becoming a father himself, he began to understand/respect [his] parents and family more. Which makes me wonder if that's why Heihachi was so retconned in Tek7 - since he spoke of this in 2016. If that's why they tried to make Heihachi more sympathetic and understandable in Tek7 rather than being a power hungry bastard. Because there may have been some personal bias in Heihachi's previous depictions, but after Harada found out what it's like to raise his own children and apparently now has newfound respect for family - he wrote Heihachi to be a more "human" character to reflect on this. Since he spoke of family, maybe it's also the reason why the Mishimas are no longer really depicted as bastards anymore. (Before, Jin was the only good Mishima. But now we have Lars, and Jinpachi, and in a way, Lee, and Jin being good again and also Tek8 is seemingly hinting at the Mishimas having a Noble Past)

I might be over-psychoanalyzing Harada too much, but I just thought those were interesting statements he had regarding the series and his own personal life, and it's making me wonder how much (if at all) his own life and experiences influences his decisions for where he wants to take the story.

Now let me return to the actual topic of this ask...

I know I've talked about those stans plenty of times. But Christ. The funniest thing too? Is that when they bring up how evil Kazuya is behaving - especially in 7 or 8, they'll just say "OH, THE GAME IS TRYING TO MAKE HIM LOOK BAD. THEY'RE FORCING THE VILLAIN ROLE ONTO HIM." Yet when you point out that Jin was poorly written in Tek6, and how he doesn't behave anything like what he was, they'll just say "WELL, IT STILL HAPPENED IN THE STORY. JIN STILL DID ALL THAT AND THEY CAN'T GO BACK ON IT." Like it's such weird weird hypocrisy and it drives me up the wall. And it'd be one thing if they didn't think Jin should be the hero - but they literally BELIEVE that Jin should be the villain still, and Kazuya gets redeemed, and he and Jun... kills Jin??? Sorry but saying the parents should kill their child is weird and fucked up to me haha. But LIKE. Even if we're speaking 100% canon events, WHAT makes Kazuya more redeemable than Jin? Because he "didn't start the war"??? He's still committing just as many atrocities, if not MORE. It's just wild how toxic fans will think when defending their character and putting down another.

[diaryformyanxiety]

Every pre teen girl throughout history has a band they obsess over.

The Beatles, *NSYNC, BTS, New Kids on the Block, The Backstreet Boys, One Direction..

Mine was One Direction

They were the one and only band I obsessed over. It started with their music, their faces, names, personalities, their history. I fell in love with the whole band. Every single member. They were my first love. And as a pre teen girl, that is everything.

I read about them and when there wasn’t enough I read fan fictions. It created a fantasy world for every fan girl like me.

I watched endless interviews, funny moment compilations, music videos, fan made videos, whatever I could find. It almost felt like it was never enough.

I would have a bad day at school and come home to listen to their music. Constantly checking their social media feeds for any updates.

I joined in the band wars and came to their defense anyway I could. I supported their relationships.

I dreamt of meeting them and seeing them in concert.

I wrote their names on my notebook and drew doodles of them to tape to my bedroom wall. I wore my I <3 1D sweatshirt every chance I could. Even in summer time.

When they broke up I was devastated but for years I held onto the hope of a reunion. Every anniversary I checked Twitter for an update or checked my email for anything from their official newsletter.

As the years went by and I started enjoying new artist or finding old ones I forgotten about, I started to forget the details of one direction I held so close to my heart.

I would listen to new music but none became this obsession. No new artist made me care enough to care to delve deeper into their history like one direction did. None of it has brought me that same happiness. Nothing has ever come close.

I would forget the obsession and the love I had for them until a song would come on the radio or accidentally play on Spotify and my heart would glow for a few minutes. I would remember the thirteen year old girl with her headphones plugged into her laptop, watching videos, listening to music, reading/writing fan fictions. I would remember the happiness this one band brought me.

As the years passed and they became solo artist I became a fan of them all over again. Not in the way I did as a teenager. I didn’t obsess, I felt proud to have known one direction as a whole and felt satisfied with their solo careers.

Every now and then I would check up on each band member but as time went on I forgot. I forgot what kept teenage me so happy, I forgot the bigger meaning of being a directioner.

Until Liam passed away.

Everything came back to me and I felt angry and sad that I forgot. I felt like I betrayed the little girl that would have completely crumbled hearing the news of his passing.

Watching social media look so similarly to what it looked like in 2013-2016 has reminded me that one direction is never over.

I may not ever get the reunion I dreamt of but I am so proud to say I was apart of something bigger. I was apart of their legacy and am so happy I have that.

Rest in Peace Liam.

Thank you for bringing the happiness back to me.

[blorbocedes]

Hi blorbie!! The new Taylor Swift songs that screams brocedes is here:

1. Anti Hero- Nico's Song

"I have this thing where I get older, but just never wiser

Midnights become my afternoons

When my depression works the graveyard shift

All of the people I've ghosted stand there in the room

I should not be left to my own devices

They come with prices and vices, I end up in crisis"

This part speaks about Nico's mental health especially in 2016 and how he ended up getting hyper focused on winning and putting everything else on the back burner.

"I wake up screaming from dreaming

One day I'll watch as you're leaving

'Cause you got tired of my scheming"

This is about Lewis and Nico and how their mind games Olympics eventually led to the break down of their friendship.

"It's me

Hi

I'm the problem, it's me

At teatime

Everybody agrees"

This bit speaks about how the f1 fandom vilified Nico and places all the blame on him instead of admitting both him and Lewis are equally to blame

"It must be exhausting always rooting for the anti-hero"

Just generally fits Nico because he is THE anti Hero ❤️‍🔥

2. You're on your own kid- Lewis's song

"Summer went away, still the yearning stays"

Refers to the iconic Greek summer vacation

"It’s okay, we’re the best of friends

Anyway

I hear it in your voice, you’re smokin’ with your boys

I touch my phone as it fits your face

I didn’t choose this town, I dream of getting out

There’s just one who could make me stay

All my days"

Lewis moved to Nico his best friend's hometown and I honestly believe if they were still on good terms he'd spend a lot more time in Monaco than he does now

"I gave my blood, spending tears more or less

I hosted parties and starved my body

Like I’d be saved by a perfect kiss

The jokes weren’t funny, I took the money

My friends brung home, don’t know what to say

I looked around in a blood-soaked gown

And I saw something they can’t take away

‘Cause there were pages turned

With the bridges burned

Everything you lose is a step you take

So make the friendship bracelets

Take the moment and taste it

You got no reason to be afraid"

This describes the lifestyle Lewis has been leading post break up and also the image he's been projecting to everyone around. He says he doesn't care but he cares so much.

"You’re on your own, kid

Yeah, you can face this

You’re on your own, kid

You always have been"

If there was a phrase to describe what Lewis has probably been repeating to himself since the brocedes break up then this is it.

3. Mastermind- the brocedes reconciliation song

"Once upon a time, the planets and the fates

And all the stars aligned

You and I ended up in the same room

At the same time

And the touch of a hand lit the fuse

Of a chain reaction of countermoves

To assess the equation of you

Checkmate, I couldn't lose

What if I told you none of it was accidental?

And the first night that you saw me, nothing was gonna stop me

I laid the groundwork and then, just like clockwork

The dominoes cascading in the line

What if I told you I'm the mastermind?

And now you're mine

It was all by design"

This is the only way brocedes will reunite. This monologue could be from either of their POV because both of them are capable of pulling off something like this.

"If you fail to plan, you plan to fail

Strategy sets the scene for the tale

I'm the wind and I'm free, flowing sails

In the liquor of our cocktails"

They are both mind games experts and plan EVERYTHING out. Also I know these two must love to drink supper fancy and expensive cocktails

"No one wanted to play with me as a little kid

So I've been scheming like a criminal ever since

To make them love me and make it seem effortless

Is this the first time I feel the need to confess?

And I swear, I'm only cryptic and Machiavellian 'cause I care"

Talks about their generally friendless childhood except for each other and how they used the media in the war against each other. Also refers to how things only got so toxic because of how much they cared about each other.

"So I told you none of it was accidental

And the first night that you saw me, nothing was gonna stop me

I laid the groundwork and then, saw a wild smirk

On your face, you knew the entire time

You knew that I'm a mastermind

And now you're mine

Yeah, all you did was smile

'Cause I'm a mastermind"

They know each other too well ti not have already known that the other was trying to "manipulate" them into falling back in love all along. They knew and they were turned on by it.

oh hello! thank you thank you I'm actually gonna finish my work and listen to the album so thank you for this important scholarship I will keep in mind as I listen!!!!!! anti hero is totally Nico ❤️

[babesonly]

fic recs 2.0!

hello kings (gn) ive got significantly more fic than last time which means this is gonna be a little more organized than the last post bc it is much longer <3 categories in order are non casefic canonverse, casefic/roadtrip fic, finale fixits, endverse, non supernatural aus, and then non destiel ones. titles will be in bold for my favs! also within each category they’re in order from shortest to longest

Canonverse

I’m a tulip in a cup by godtiering (1.2k)

I worry that I never really came back from hell. I wonder why, if I got remade by heaven, I’m still the same screwed up kid that I always was.

Sometimes I worry I’m not into women at all.

"Guess not,” he looks at his shoes.

a REALLY good fic that’s basically just a look inside dean’s head during my bloody valentine do not read this looking for a fun time but please do read it

on vessels by flightsofangels (1.9k)

“You know,” Cas mutters into Dean’s bare skin. “When I was still… an angel, I used to dream that I would take you as my vessel.”

hello consumehimnatural fans!!!!! read newt’s fic right now its incredible

dean winchester is not a nicholas sparks protagonist by microcomets (1.9k)

Dean fell in love with Cas the way you fall asleep--slowly, and then all at once. Or some other hackneyed and trite bullshit. God, this is embarrassing.

dean is in LOVE. he’s also a disaster who keeps staring at cas’ hands. sigh

Stay by aeli_kindara (2.5k)

Coda to 13.06 (Tombstone). In which Castiel reckons with the aftermath of Dean's grief.

hello fellow widow arc fans <3 click here to see cas find out abt the events of advanced thanatology !

walking on a string by swordfishtrombones (2.7k)

Between the doomed offensive at the Firmament and the impending retreat from the ravaged northeast border, Castiel left camp long enough to answer one of Dean Winchester's prayers.

S6 DEAN IS A WAR WIFE. been really into early seasons deancas lately and this one is very good. god

the flesh of the mighty by Mudprophet (2.7k)

Ezekiel 39:17 "you shall eat the flesh of the mighty and drink the blood of the princes of the earth."

MY GOD. anyone who saw the @autisticandroids​ purgatory cannibalism talk and was interested read this right now. also anyone who enjoyed nbc hannibal OR raw (2016). if romantic cannibalism is remotely aligned with your interests read this right now. god

Sam Winchester, Ally At Law by alittleduck (3.3k)

Sam was pretty sure he could read every single gay friendly guide to coming out or supporting queer family members ever written and literally none of them would even imply that arguing with gay people that they were actually just homophobic constituted as "ally behavior". However, Sam was equally sure that none of those book authors had found themselves accidentally watching their brother get pounded by an Angel of the Lord at 9 am on Tuesday, so Sam was pretty sure he might actually still have the higher ground. Now, if only Jack would stop trying to bond with Dean using gay slurs long enough for Sam to convince everyone of that, he might just be able to cobble together some remnant of sanity or, failing that, dignity.

Or, the one where Sam desperately wants to invent PFLAG but Dean won't stop teaching Jack gay slurs

JACK VOICE HEY COCKSUCKERS. 

hummed low by microcomets (3.3k)

Dean pulls the Impala over at a cider barn about thirty miles out; doesn't really think about it, just sees the hokey orange lettering off the roadside and lets his hands guide the Impala off the interstate with gravel spitting under the wheels.

they get a nice day out together and dean has a gay crisis and it’s written beautifully mwah

Vena Amoris and Other Old-Fashioned Bullshit by pyrebi (3.9k)

In which angelic marriage bonds are apparently stupidly easy to trigger, Cas wages multidimensional war in Heaven, Dean can't catch a break like ever, Sam rather enjoys being a dick, love saves the day, and nobody consummates anything.

sometimes i think about this fic and it hits that at this point dean and cas would have been married for more than a year. cas my beloved...

an exploration of gender; angelic by sometimeswelose (4k)

Castiel's true form is made of electromagnetic radiation. He has spent the majority of his life, if you really want to add it all up and average the whole thing out, as a wavelength of celestial intent.

The thing about being made of light: it's light in the physics sense of the word. Castiel's waves are gamma, x-ray, micro, and radio. He's visible light too, of course, a visible light so intense that it is blinding to most humans.

hello trans cas community <3 he’s literally trans he was assigned genderless and then went hm actually i will be a man! love of my life

Some Boys are Sleeping Alone by prosopopeya (4.2k)

This isn't something that's okay, not for him, but it chases him through the years until it turns into something he can't -- doesn't want to deny. 

ohhh deans tenuous relationship with his sexuality my beloved...

love. worship. consummation. consumption. by redeyedwrath (4.3k)

ConsumehimNatural (copyright marcusantonius) the Series!

These are all snapshots centered around the idea of you know. Hunger in Supernatural. Both carnal hunger and other kinds. Fics are shown in semi-chronological order but this series is generally nebulously early seasons.

for ANYONE who is a consumehimnaturual this is required reading it is INCREDIBLE and gorgeous and very visceral and i am so very obsessed with it. thank you redeyedwrath for enabling my brainrot

the reach of human sense by perilously (4.5k)

“You know what Jimmy Novak looked like. You think he was beautiful—gorgeous, hot, all of it. It’s him. Not me. This isn’t my face.”

“But,” Dean says. He doesn’t know where he’s going with it. Just that Cas’ face is right there, brows drawn together and cheekbones gleaming in the lamplight. It’s a face that’s made his heart skip probably a couple hundred beats collectively since they met.

And it used to belong to someone else.

this one is just very nice <3 cas gets uncomfortable w dean calling him attractive since dean has never seen his trueform and they work it out

Down in the River by Ias (4.7k)

Alone in Purgatory and hunted by Leviathans, Castiel finds himself praying to the one person who can't hear him.

cas i love you <3 cas alone in purgatory praying to dean bc dean is the only thing he still worships i love you so much

Creature of Habit by trinityofone (5.1k)

The more you love someone, the more you want to kill them. Or: How Cas developed some bad habits, and Dean coped surprisingly well.

written in s5 when cas was depowered and completely nails the later seasons bitchy husbands dynamic it’s very good and fun <3

sink by crackers4jenn (5.4k)

"Where to?" A 9.06 coda.

very bittersweet very well written and also canon compliant so do not go into this one looking for a happy ending but i DO recommend it it’s very good

Sensational by castiowl (6.1k)

“When I first came to earth, it was advised that we temper the senses bound to our vessels. They were a distraction, we were told. An antiquated form of experiencing existence that would hinder our ability to complete our missions, whatever that may be. My true form can better facilitate these experiences. What you would recognize as heightened senses of sight and sound, among other things.”

Or, how Dean helps Cas experience all five human senses for the first time in one night.

early seasons deancas man. i love the sound part i love dean being so worried about doing a good job with this. god. read this please

Something to Protect by Sass_Master (6.2k)

Dean’s violent reaction to being unexpectedly woken has become something of a running joke among them, but Castiel can’t help but look past it to the underlying cause. It makes him ache to think that Dean feels so unsafe, so persecuted, before he’s even fully conscious.

Secretly, Castiel has been determined to work on that, to ease Dean into awareness in a less jarring way, smooth away one of the many stresses that follow him even in sleep. Now’s as good a time as any to try.

oh to sleep more soundly in the presence of someone you love...this fic is very nice i enjoyed it a lot

all this and heaven too by ftmsteverogers (7k)

“Hey,” Dean said. “I’m not ashamed of you, okay?”

Cas raised skeptical eyes to meet his.

“I mean it,” Dean insisted.

“I understand you mean it,” Cas said. “But I don’t think it’s any better if you’re only ashamed of yourself.”

hello trans dean community here is 7k of trans dean having to deal with his internalized homophobia now that he’s sleeping with cas <3 it is SO good

The wilderness. by orange_crushed (8k)

He takes a shower and the pressure is not especially good, but it doesn’t matter. It’s warm and he stands under the spray a long time. Human skin, he knows, constantly renews itself, shedding the dead cells of the epidermis. He wonders how long it will take until he is an entirely new person, until every cell on his surface is a new one. He looks at his hands under the water. It might take less than a month.

this might be the only post 9x03 fic on here with a happy ending actually? plenty of good melancholy leading up to it though <3 canon divergent after 9x03 though which means no 9x06 fanfiction gap but it is absolutely worth reading

till the juice runs by deathbanjo (8.4k)

Apparently whoever drew up the venn diagram of Dean’s sex life decided the circle labelled ‘good sex’ and the one labelled ‘sex with men’ should be kept far apart.

hello this one is SO funny dean finally gets comfortable enough with his bisexuality to start having sex with men and it goes so very bad every time so sorry about your shitty choices beloved </3

First Date by aeli_kindara (8.9k)

“We should go on a date. You and me.”

Castiel wishes he could see Dean’s face. He wishes he had any idea what to say.

“I’m asking you out, Cas.”

this one is very sweet i liked it a lot <3 good refreshing little fic where they just get to have a nice evening together

Entertaining Strangers by cadignan (9k)

Dean settles on to his side, lying in the bed facing Castiel. “So you had sex without me and you bit all my moves. I think I deserve to hear about it, at least. What was her name?”

op im in love with you. premise is established relationship deancas and cas mentions he did have sex before dean and not only that it was a threesome. good for him <3 this fic is cas describing the story of what led up to the threesome and what happened during it while dean interrupts regularly. incredible

the shape you take by noviembre (10k)

“What?” Dean says, fake-offended. “I’d be hot as a girl, you know I would.”

And this is when he really, really should have stopped talking. When he shouldn't have whipped back around and asked, “Cas, if I was a woman, you’d fuck me, right?”

Because if he hadn’t said that, then he wouldn’t have had to deal with this:

Cas, meeting his eyes, forehead wrinkles all smoothed out like there’s nothing to be confused about anymore. Cas with something at the corner of his mouth that might barely be called a smile.

Cas saying, calmly and without hesitation, “Yes, Dean.”

--

Dean Winchester fucks around and, with the inadvertent help of some witches, Finds Out.

dean winchester your gender is diabolical. this fic is insane and its the only thing that matters actually. dean fully convinced its normal and straight to think about being a woman so you can fuck your male friend. incredible. op im proposing to you

Sinnerman by a_good_soldier (10k)

Dean listens to Nina Simone, reads Anne Carson, and makes out with a dude (sort of).

yall want to read about dean realizing he’s in love with a man as a direct result of learning to better respect women right?

you’re fooling yourself by cowboydeanwinchester (13k)

Dean Winchester and Castiel retire from hunting to raise baby Jack. Dean struggles to allow himself the things he truly wants.

Jack is two, Castiel and Dean are idiots, and Sam's gotta solve everyone's problems.

love a married couple who doesn’t know they’re married <3 everyone say thank you sam for bullying dean 

The Girlfriend Experience by rageprufrock (15k)

While it's not like Dean hasn't had a couple of truly regrettable hit-and-runs in his sexual history, this is probably the saddest fucking thing that has ever happened to him.

a classic for good fucking reason. we’ve all talked about dean thinking holding hands is too gay after having just had gay sex but my personal favorite was sam accusing dean of cheating on cas because dean bought condoms. incredible

No Kingdom To Come by domesticadventures (16k)

“We should fuck,” Dean says.

Cas looks up from where he sits on his bed, hair still damp from the shower, frowning as he places a finger on the page of his book to mark where he left off.

There are a million things Cas could say here; Dean has rehearsed them. After lunch, his restlessness had given way to a vague panic, a dread that matched his every step and crept along with him from room to room. Eventually, he had returned to his bedroom and spent the rest of the afternoon pacing back and forth, playing out all the possible scenarios. When Cas asks him Why? or Are you being serious? or when he sighs and says, in that way he has, Dean, he knows exactly what he’s going to do. He’s going to shrug casually, like he isn’t invested in the answer, like he isn’t desperate for an outlet, and say, Why not? He’s going to raise an eyebrow and say, What, are you not interested? He’s going to crowd into Cas’ personal space, he’s going to shove himself right up in there and whisper Cas against his ear.

Instead, Cas says, carefully, “Okay.”

literally the only quarantine fic i’ve ever bothered to read in any fandom and completely worth it it’s SO good. they become fwb and dean has an existential crisis and he keeps bringing up meaninglessness and death during sex

Bodies by Speary (18k)

It was a secret they never acknowledged even with each other. It would change everything, end everything if either of them ever dropped the act. So they became very good at acting, at keeping up the lie that gave them what they wanted. Even if that lie involved constantly seeking out temporary, consenting female vessels, Cas would do it. He told himself it was worth it for Dean. He just hoped that he could stop wanting more, or maybe one day Dean might stop pretending that he wasn't really sleeping with Cas every time.

i don’t even have anything to add tbh if that summary did not immediately make you click we are very different this fic is incredible. god. fellas do you ever make yourself a woman so you can fuck the man you love without him having to talk about it or confront his sexuality

it’s such a mystery (the way you know me) by fleeceframe (20k)

So the man crouching in front of Castiel is named Dean. He wonders if that’s supposed to mean something to him.

“Cas must’ve got hit with something earlier. He just dropped like a sack of fucking potatoes a minute ago. By the time I was checking on him, he had already woken up again, but now he doesn’t fucking know who we are.”

“I’m right here you know,” Castiel says testily.

Sam’s eyes are wide even as his eyebrows are furrowed, and he looks between Dean and Castiel again.

“What do you remember, Cas?”

“Firstly, that I’m not Cas. I don’t know who Cas is, but it’s not me. I don’t know who either of you are, either."

or the one where castiel is hit with a memory curse that makes him forget the winchester brothers and is stunned to find out he has a family... also why can't he stop thinking about dean?

BEST amnesia fic oh my god. cas my beloved you deserve the world. everyone read this that is not a request.

More Than Ever by Sass_Master (20k)

Dean’s getting some pancakes together for breakfast when Cas saunters in after a run.

He’s trying to focus on whisking batter, unfairly distracted by Cas a few feet away, breathing heavily and shining with perspiration. Dean’s been painfully aware for a long time that Cas is pretty easy on the eyes, but he’s used to seeing Cas buttoned-up and unflappable, looking straight-laced in a stiff oxford and an unflattering trenchcoat.

Now Cas is sweating, Dean’s borrowed t-shirt clinging to his skin, flushed from exertion and Dean really can’t deal with that in his kitchen right now.

this entire series is really good i enjoyed it a lot, i’m just putting this one specifically on the list bc the rest of the series is very explicit and this is really good as a standalone for anyone who wouldn’t be into the rest of the series!!

Being Dean Winchester by Anonymous (20k)

"You should show me some respect. I dragged you out of hell. I can throw you back in."

Who the fuck was this bitchy "warrior of God" doing talking to him like that? Fuck Cas-tee-el and his dumbass trench coat and abrasive motherfucking attitude.

Dean was done with this shit.

***

Wherein a monster of the week steals the essence of Castiel's vessel, so he must use Dean, recently raised from hell, as a vessel instead.

it is at this point i realize that there are more fics than i expected there to be on this list that involves a threesome with only two people/using the presence of a female body to act like what’s happening is heterosexual. deangirlism is a disease 

I Shall Not Want by domesticadventures (20k)

His grace is burning out, and the wasteland it leaves inside him becomes an echo chamber for all the memories, all the fear and doubt and self-loathing he's collected over the years. Things said and done hound him on endless repeat until he's convinced they’ll break through his skin and fill the silence of the bunker.

His head is killing him, and he sits hunched over an open book, not really reading, just digging his fingers into his skull and praying nothing slips through the cracks.

this one is GORGEOUS i love it so so much. dean and cas are both struggling so much to get by and they’re trying to support each other but fucking it up and they have to grow together and learn to cope with the fact that this is where their lives are and they fall in love i need everyone to read this

To Boldly Go by 8daysuntiltheapocalypseiguess (24k)

Title: Just One of Those Things Author: Impala67 Series: TOS Rating: M Summary: Four years into their five-year mission, and all the planets start to look the same.

In which Dean is not Gene Roddenberry, but he does write Star Trek fanfiction.

mx winchester writing star trek fanfiction to process his own trauma <3 this is a wip but it’s SO good and i also have not consumed a single piece of star trek media so it IS definitely readable to anyone who isn’t a star trek fan. please read this

where the weeds take root by deathbanjo (30k)

“Are you happy? Y’know. Just—being here,” Dean says, gesturing to the yard with his beer bottle. “Being with—I mean, you used to fight in celestial wars and—and save the world. Now you’re growing vegetables and talking about chickens.”

this is on here just for the 1.5 people who were putting off this one like i did for no reason. it’s extremely good and it is just gentle. i enjoyed it a lot

Heroes for Ghosts by pantheon_of_discord (42k)

After Sam and Dean are arrested, Castiel is left alone and scrambling to find them. He knows they’re locked away in a government facility, and he’s still able to hear their prayers, but no matter how he tries Castiel can’t seem to track them. He chases leads and even attempts to hunt on his own, but Mary is AWOL, Crowley refuses to help, and Castiel’s options are running out.

Weeks pass, Castiel’s hope dwindles, and through it all Dean prays, keeping them connected. His voice is comforting, frustrating, and occasionally annoying, but in his solitude Castiel comes to cherish it. But then one day, without warning, Dean stops praying, and Castiel is forced to confront some uncomfortable truths about his feelings.

yall ever wonder what it would’ve been like if the sam and dean arrest storyline in s12 was interesting? yeah <3

Teaching Poetry to Fish by aeli_kindara (52k)

In which Castiel teaches poetry to fish. Also, himself. Also, eventually, Dean.

(A series-long story, diverging slightly from canon after S14.)

cas learning about humanity through poetry before dean and thats what led to him developing enough emotion to be lobotomized....cas i love you so much

Emergence by ellispark (58k)

Something’s been missing from Dean’s life for the past three years, a void left after a hunt gone terribly wrong. He often feels a sense of longing with no discernible cause, a need to talk to someone who isn’t there.

A call from an acquaintance leads Dean to James Novak, a man who disappeared more than a decade ago, and suddenly Dean gets the feeling he’s found what he’s been missing. But James isn’t really James — he’s the angel Castiel, who’s wanted by angels, demons and hunters alike. And he may be at the center of the storm that wrecked Dean’s life all those years ago.

another cool amnesia fic!! for unknown reasons everyone forgot cas three years ago but cas didn’t forget anything. cas deserves so much love and support. god

a turn of the earth by microcomets (95k)

Dean’s your typical half-orphaned, monster-killing 22-year-old until a trenchcoated stranger crashes into his back windshield one September night, claiming he’s an angel that knows him from the future and that he’s on the run.

Frigging fantastic.

(Or, in which Castiel gets stuck in Dean’s timeline preseries and Dean kind of hates it—until he doesn’t.)

cas getting to meet and fall in love with pre hell dean just as much as he loves the dean he already knows oh my GOD. i love this fic so much. turn of the earth my beloved

Crossing Lines by sometimeswelose (122k)

Two Deans, one Cas - it's not as sexy as it sounds

Or

An ethics lesson from Hell

Or

The one where Dean from the past meets Dean in the present. They're not sure they like each other very much.

deans intense self hatred vs cas’ unwavering love for every version of dean oh my GOD also this is a wip fair warning but it’s so worth waiting for updates i’m having such a great time with this one i cannot wait to see how it gets ended

Plot Holes by saltyfeathers (160k)

Of course it wasn’t over after the apocalypse.

There was season six. Then there was season seven. Against all expectations, there was season eight. There were the alphas and purgatory, and then the Leviathans, and then the angels fell. Enter season nine. Loose threads Metatron, Abaddon, and Crowley have to be tied up. Sam, Dean, and Cas have to try to tie them while at the same time dealing with their evolving relationships and newfound graceless states.

Amidst all the chaos, someone has started publishing the Supernatural novels again. Convinced there’s something amiss in the pages, Charlie starts her own quest to suss out the truth behind the Winchester Gospels.

With the help of various faces, old and new, they must now not only deal with the typical runs of demons and recently fallen angels, but also reconcile the battles raging inside themselves, as the fate of the world, once again, quite literally lays in the palm of their hands.

saltyfeathers said i WILL make the plot holes in this show mean something because the showrunners are sure as shit never gonna adress them ! and i thank them for it bc this was a really cool read

Casefic/Roadtrip Fic

Deprived Of Every Planet by KelpietheThundergod (9k)

Dean's breathing is audible in the scant space between them, irregular. The motel room is dark, pale blue shadows falling in through the gaps in the blinds. Throwing a pattern of uneven white stripes over the bunched up covers. Over Dean's fingers twisted in the sheets. One half of him in shadow, softened by the dark. The heat of his skin. The tremble of him under Castiel's touch.

He caresses a hand over Dean's chest, slowly. Dean's mouth falls open, his body arching into Castiel's touch. Castiel stops over Dean's heart. Through the fever of his desire, he rejoices about the wonder of experiencing another's heartbeat through one's own senses.

Dean gasps, but then he turns his face away and towards the dark. Eyes closed tight and brows furrowed like something is hurting him.

Castiel stills.

“Dean?”

the case is background on this one but it Does take place over the course of a case so im putting it here. god touchstarved dean trying so hard to work through his shit for cas head in my hands i love this fic so much

before and after breakfast by spocklee (10k)

The monster of the week is a ghost who hates meat, alcohol, and feeling yourself. Guess who it is during the commercials.

chapter 2 of this one.....god. dean and cas you are both so unwell <3 i love everything abt this fic everyone read it now

we shovel all the ashes out by xylodemon (15k)

Dean’s always known things were headed this way. He just figured getting dragged under would be cleaner and easier than jumping in feet-first.

fics that make you go Oh they love each other...also there’s lesbians in it literally what else could you want.

thunder road by dothraki_shieldmaiden (20k)

After Chuck is defeated and the Winchesters settle into life without God, Dean Winchester is bored.

OR: Dean and Cas take a road trip and figure out some stuff along the way.

this fic is just like. it’s kind! this fic is kind it’s just a pleasant experience and i enjoyed it thoroughly. they’re in love and it’s good

Suck It, Judy Garland by GlitterDwarf, midrashic (20k)

It had to be St. Louis. Or, the one where Sam and Cas get fake married for a case, and Dean loses his mind.

actually im gonna defend dean here imagine youre dean and cas gives what definitely sounded like a deathbed love confession while making eye contact with you and then immediately afterwards fake dates your brother. who among us would not have been a bitch about this

best friends without benefits by lizbobjones (20k)

It’s nearing three a.m. and they’ve been on the road a long time. Sam’s been asleep in the back seat since eleven. Giving up and handing the wheel over to Cas and letting the guy who doesn’t sleep drive had seemed like a good idea.

the premise of this fic is so funny. cas voice dean you want to fuck me so bad it makes you look stupid. everyone read this

the taste of gravel in the mouth by deathbanjo (22k)

This is what Cas gave up Heaven for: greasy diner food, shitty motel rooms with even shittier cable, long car rides spent in complete silence except for the same six tapes playing over and over again, and a burnt-out husk of a man who can barely hold a conversation anymore.

alt version of getting rid of the mark of cain, the darkness never happens. this one is VERY heavy but it’s so good and it has a hopeful ending. ive read this one twice and loved it both times

Someone Who’s Feeling For Me by ellispark (45k)

Dean sees her for the first time in nearly six years in some no-name town in Idaho, and it's panic at first sight.

Lisa Braeden, the one woman Dean ever actually had a shot at a real life with, back from where he buried her in his mind. And her hand is on Cas's arm like it's no big deal, like it belongs there. Cas, Dean's dorky, sweet, badass, angelic best friend, and he's just standing there next to Lisa and not moving her hand away.

Dean feels the jealousy rising, and it's not directed where he expected it to be. Because it takes this exact moment for Dean to realize he's in love with his best friend. He's in love with his best friend, and Lisa is looking at Cas like he's the best thing since automatic rifles, and Dean is utterly fucked.

hello op please contact me. please contact me and let me see the inside of your brain. this fic was an unparalleled experience and everyone should also go through it. i love it so very much

Bumper Cars by mansikka (111k)

Two teenagers are missing from an abandoned carnival, and there’s enough to raise suspicion that their disappearance involves a ghost. Dean, Sam, and Cas arrive in town to investigate, though what they find leads them away from those teenagers, and on the trail of a ghost story that churns up things from their past.

Can newly-human Cas, and Dean, with the help of shipper!Sam, work out the mystery behind the abandoned carnival and its ghost, and along the way, figure out the riddle that is them?

one of my absolute fav case fics it forces dean to confront some aspects of johns parenting and work through some shit and also him and cas fall in love and it’s really well done. love this one a lot <3

Finale Fix-its/Finale Denial

Sorry Jimmy by K_K_TiBal (2.1k)

Based on the tumblr textpost:

jellydeans: so are cas and jimmy novak just up in heaven existing at the same time katebushstandean: #jimmy moves to heaven timbuku so that dean stops trying to make out with him every time they run into each other at the heaven grocery store

this one is just extremely funny. local midwestern heterosexual man is forced to play relationship counselor to the dumbest gay people in existence because one of them wore his face

Dean Winchester Really Needs To Make Some Gay Friends by AreYouReady (2.2k)

“Like, I’m trying to think if I’ve had, I don’t know, crushes. If I ever had a gay thing before you came along and just didn’t notice,” Dean said.

Cas suddenly looked down, and away from Dean. If Dean didn’t know better, he would swear Cas looked guilty.

“What is it, Cas?”

“You have had several… gay things before.” Cas still wouldn’t look at him.

“What? When? How come you know this better than I do?”

There was no way the answer to this question wasn’t funny as hell.

dean learning about gay ppl via the memories of dean smith...incredible.

tiny difference (between ending and starting to begin) by sunforgrace (2.4k)

Sometimes Dean catches Cas staring at the sky.

It doesn’t happen often. Not when Dean’s around to tell, anyway. But often enough that he starts to notice.

Eventually Dean starts to recognize the pattern.

Cas just doesn’t watch the sky. He watches the birds.

Chuck is gone, Cas is human, and the world is safe. In the quiet aftermath Dean and Castiel find each other again.

i really don’t have much to say abt this one it is just very good and they love each other so much

Bring Home by cenotaphy (3.8k)

Dean's phone doesn't ring on the drive back to the Bunker, but that's okay. Because—well, maybe Cas lost his cell, what with getting shuffled back and forth between a cosmic void dimension and all. And anyway, Dean doesn't want this conversation to happen over the phone, he wants to—he wants to talk to Cas face-to-face. They should talk face-to-face.

Dean will tell him—

Dean doesn't know what he'll tell Cas. Dean is, in fact, terrified by how utterly and completely he does not know what he'll say to Cas.

cas being forced to face the consequences of sending the risky text that was despair <3

dean’s coworkers vs the heteronormative agenda by cowboydeanwinchester (4.1k)

Dean started working at a local auto repair shop in Lebanon, Kansas about a year ago. His coworkers don't know much about him. Except that he has a wife. Or maybe he doesn't. But he has a kid. Who is either a toddler or a high schooler. Who is either named Jack or Sammy. He also might have a best friend named Cas, but that also might be his wife.

Truth is nobody knows what to make of Dean.

obsessed w people not knowing a single fucking thing about dean because he talks so much and never explains anything. this fic is SO funny

Enhanced Extraction Techniques by goldenraeofsun (5.8k)

The Empty takes Meg’s shape, Samandriel’s, Duma’s, every one of the thousands of angels Cas killed up in heaven. But in the middle of lecturing Cas in the form of Balthazar, it explodes in a burst of light and sound.

Dean Winchester stands in the aftermath.

the empty playing mind games on an awake cas bc it can’t put him to sleep is a thing i like a lot and this is very very good 

Speak Silence No More by rea_sunshine (8.1k)

When Dean imagined this moment, it went like this:

Dean bursts into the Empty—guns blazing, chin high, righteous anger coursing through him. No matter what form his plans and fantasies and whiskey-drunk-whispered-promises took, he is always, always successful. When he imagined it, he was finally the hero Cas deserved.

The reality of the moment is this:

It’s fucking cold.

dean and cas STILL managing to not communicate with each other properly after the confession is so funny to me and this fic does it really well. also i like that a human being in the empty, where humans do NOT belong, had some like. consequences

my heart is a compass by lagaudiere (10k)

“There you are,” the Empty says, in Dean’s voice. It’s cold, like Dean’s eyes are cold, his expression set in contempt. It’s the expression Cas feared, he realizes, all the times he thought about saying it. Revulsion. It makes him feel sick in the way that goes beyond physical, here where there is nothing physical left.

The moment before it happened had been so sweet it covered up all the hurt. For years, Cas had been holding back those words, biting down on his tongue to keep from saying them. And now he had said it, and he knew that it was good, knew that it was worth it. But on the other side there is only this.

--

In the Empty, Cas dreams of his regrets, until someone comes looking for him.

one of thee best dean rescues cas from the empty fics out there i love the way his memories are written i love how many of them were ones that this fic came up with to give me new things to have brainworms over instead of just making me more fixated on He Watched Him Rake Leaves than i already am

killing time by orestespdf (11k)

It's been four years since Dean saved Cas from the Empty and confessed his feelings in return, and in their Vermont lakehouse, the retired couple is now learning how to heal. One morning, Dean gives Cas a haircut.

(A character study of Castiel.)

perfect fic perfect fic no notes no complaints they love each other so much and now dean is giving cas a haircut and they’re spending the day together. god.

and every time we kiss, i swear i can fly by knameless (14k)

Every time, Dean tells himself it’s the last.

--

aka, twelve times dean and cas kiss.

a just boy best friends kiss for every season <3 mwah

for which no words exist by MediaWhore (14k)

'a prayer for which no words exist' // richard siken

"Dear Cas who art in my bathtub, give me the strength to be honest about how I feel. For your sake and for mine. Forgive me all the times I wasn’t in the past, all the words I should have said but didn’t. And please stay. Please stay with me when all is said and done. Amen. "

Dean rescues a newly human Cas from the Empty. That's the easy step.

mediawhore i am in LOVE with you oh my god this fic. this fic. dean taking care of cas after rescuing him dean wrapping cas in a blanket oh my GOD

swimming with the fish pond fish by februyuri (17k)

Some time between Dean bleeding out on a makeshift hook in a barn in Ohio and Sam making marshmallows on his funeral pyre, Dean was brought back to life. By Castiel. Again. Dean agreed to it if only to give Jack time to work out the glitches up top. So, now Dean’s back in the land of the living and things are ... actually good, for once.

Or, as good as they can be when demons are attacking Earth, Dean’s failing to get over why he died in the first place, and Cas is suddenly, inexplicably taking every opportunity to casually tell Dean that he loves him.

this is a wip! but it is so good and so worth the read i love it a lot and am very excited for the last chapter. it IS pretty heavy though dean has a LOT to work through

looking like a true survivor (feeling like a little kid) by courfeyrac (20k)

"Jack’s a clever kid—has been ever since he was born, maybe even before that—but Dean’s pretty sure he hasn’t figured out where they’re going yet. And Dean’s… Dean’s excited about it. He remembers planning surprises for Sammy when they were little—saving up quarters and sneaking off to the arcade the year he turned seven, or slipping a book Dean had seen Sammy admiring into his jacket before sprinting out of the store the year he turned twelve. There was only so much Dean could give him back then, hindered by lack of finances and transportation and a father who paid attention. Now, though, Dean’s got a wallet full of cash, a tank full of gas, and the freedom to give his kid the kind of birthday he deserves."

Or, it's Jack's fourth birthday, and the kid wants to go to Build-A-Bear.

EVERYONE READ THIS RIGHT NOW. that is not a request this fic undid me. oh my god. oh my god. they’re a family and they’re going to build a bear and they love each other. oh my god. also no it isn’t a baby jack fic he is 4 and he is also alcal

what’s missing is found (our souls can exhale now) by sobsicles (27k)

It's not the first time Claire has ever gone missing. It is, however, the first time Kaia panics about it. Dean's dragged into the mess, but he soon finds that it's the best thing that could have happened to him.

~~~

"But have you ever just met someone and maybe it wasn't from the first moment, maybe it was after all these other moments that meant more than you ever expected them to, and it seems like your soul just—just—" Kaia makes a helpless gesture with her hands, pushing out, and she breathes out loudly. "Like it can finally exhale. And that person isn't guaranteed to make you happy, but they're—they're important. You just know it, you can't even escape it, you can't let them go. Ever met someone like that, Dean?"

"I—" Dean halts, his mouth hanging open. He's looking at Kaia, who's looking at him, and his heart is fluttering in his throat like a caged bird aching to soar again. His mind threatens to spiral out of control, but he focuses, swallowing hard. "Yeah. Um. I—yeah, I have."

deancas AND dreamhunter we love to see it also dean DOES smoke weed with kaia and apologizes for pulling a gun on her what more could you want in a fic

Command Me To Be Well by prospopeya (28k)

Dean did a lot of thinking about when and how he would get Cas back. Months of it, actually, stretching into a year, because while Sam and Eileen were settling into their new lives, Dean was stuck. He was stuck in a faraway corner of the bunker, dark and empty and hollow, ringing with the sound of a vibrating phone.

So when he falls to his knees in that same room, exhausted, hurting, breathless, and he feels a hand on his shoulder and looks up to see Cas, he realizes that he doesn't have a single clue about what to do now. Getting Cas out had been easy--actually, it'd been the opposite of that--but the planning of it, the methodical desperation of one attempt after the other had been a familiar rhythm. It'd been soothing almost, solid, something to focus on that wasn't Cas's eyes, watery and jubilant in a way Dean hadn't ever seen that up close on anyone, let alone Cas.

And now Cas is pulling him to his feet, and Dean's stumbling, and he instinctually grabs Cas's arm, and his hand lights up with a fire that he isn't prepared for.

"Hello, Dean."

oh post despair lack of communication....oh dean refusing to work through his feelings...this fic is incredible i love it everyone who enjoys dean doing everything in his power to avoid talking about feelings up to and including having sex with the guy who’s in love with him multiple times should read this

break the skin (to break the barriers) by sobsicles (29k)

The first time she meets him, he's nothing more than an almost-missed appointment.

SOBSICLES TATTOO FIC MY BELOVED. dean grieving and getting tattoos and it turns into tattoo therapy. im SO in love with mitzi it’s insane. requires some suspension of disbelief for how long a tattoo takes but it’s an incredible fic and an unparalleled experience. sobsicles does not miss

ascend by quiettewandering (53k)

Something in the world is wrong.

Demon activity is rising where mysterious black substance oozes and unusual ecological events are shaking the world. Dean, grief hanging on his shoulders, restlessly searches for answers that might lead him to the Empty… and to Cas.

But what Chuck wrote can’t be undone. The narrative thread pulls Dean along, forcing him to comply. Because once a story already has an ending, it can’t be rewritten.

Or can it?

SUPER cool concept i liked this a lot i’m pretty sure everyone’s read it already but just in case someone hasn’t you absolutely should

oh sooner or later it all comes down to faith by sobsicles (62k)

Getting used to Heaven is something of a marvel. It ain't perfect, and Dean thinks he'd hate it if it was, which is probably why it isn't.

~~~

"You don't understand," Dean whispers, exhaling shakily. "I know you don't, because even I don't. The instant you were gone, I wanted you back. Cas, I wanted you back. I wanted—I wanted—"

Cas stares at him, searching his face. After a moment, his own face falls slack, eyes widening just so. "Oh," he breathes out.

Dean wants to be furious that Cas has figured it out before he has—whatever it is—but he's not even that surprised. Cas knows him too well, always has, even more than Dean knows himself. He's been kicking Dean in the goddamn teeth with how deeply he understands him, even about the things Dean doesn't, ever since they first met. You don't think you deserve to be saved, that's what Cas had said. All bundled up in impossibilities and power, this being that looked at Dean Winchester and knew every single inch of him, as if he had a right to each part.

"What?" Dean grits out.

"I love you, too."

the ONLY heaven fic. i do not read heaven fics bc i refuse to budge in my finale denialism i refuse to read fic where it is accepted that dean dies. i was hesitant to read this but god im glad i did it was so good. literally the best possible outcome of dean dying

Endverse

final fantasy. by orange_crushed (1.9k)

“If I’d actually been born human, would I have gotten sick like everyone else? Would I be running around gnawing on the neighbors?” Castiel tilts his head up and even from here Dean can see the black ring of his pupils, wide and dark as dead stars. He’s high as fuck and he’s been loading the guns for forty-five minutes. He stares into the space where Dean is. He smiles and shows his teeth. “Maybe you’d have already put a bullet in my head.”

"This is why you don’t lead storytime anymore," Dean says. "This kind of shit."

endverse last night on earth fics are something that can be so personal actually. god

The Last Song by Moorishflower (3.5k)

The very last song is the Song of Solomon, and Castiel sings it only for Dean. Set in "The End."

this is like. pre endverse and the tone is so like. wistful? is the best word ive got? it’s gorgeous i love it but fair warning there is graphic description of like. viscera and infected wounds

to think that we could stay the same by cipherwriter (6.5k)

cas has all he needs; himself, his creation, and enough power to continue this cycle for a long time. he's fine. dean wants to take care of him anyway.

oh my GOD this one is good it’s based off the thing of how originally endverse cas was supposed to be just sitting in a room killing and resurrecting the same cockroach over and over. very bittersweet at some points i love it a lot, do not read it if youre looking for something happy though lmao

the first church at the end of the world by withbloodstainedclothingon (11k)

The angels don’t eat the brain. Only Croats do that.

this one is fucked but it’s incredible it contains very heavy and violent subject matter and cas is an Actual cult leader he doesn’t just have orgies it is SO well done and i had a great time reading it i recommend it very highly if the warnings sound like something you can stomach

Down to Agincourt by seperis (1.1 million. i know. yes it’s a wip)

There is no such thing as a guarantee when it comes to war.

The outcome's known. Why try? Return your rusty sword to battered sheath, bow your head and bend your stubborn knee. Why take the field when you cannot win the war? But Harry -- he went down to Agincourt.

PLEASE. i know the length is intimidating i KNOW it’s a very long fic but please. please read down to agincourt i am begging you. head in my HANDS this series is incredible.

Non Supernatural AUS

Long-Term Relationship by bendingsignpost (2.7k)

Castiel says, budging over to make room for Dean on the couch, “I thought we should have a serious talk about our relationship.”

Reflexively, Dean laughs.

Castiel does not.

“Uh, Cas... you know we’re not dating, right?”

look man it’s bendingsignpost okay. it’s bendingsignpost it’s good and it’s sweet and you should read it

One White Lie by komodobits (11k)

Castiel takes a deep breath and rings the doorbell. He doesn’t need to run through what he’s going to say – he’s already planned and edited and rehearsed it a thousand times. He is going to ask Dean Winchester out to dinner. If it’s not too forward, he’ll say, perfectly charming. You see, I’ve seen you around the neighbourhood and you always seem so earnest and I’d really like to get to know you bette— The door swings open, and Castiel panics.

He intends to excuse himself. He means to apologise and come back some other time. However, in a moment of blind fear, what comes out of his mouth instead are the words, “Could you spare a moment for Jesus Christ?”

do you ever pretend to be a jehovahs witness for months to hang out with the guy you like because you fucked up asking him out? yeah.

separate ways and sleeping dogs by sobsicles (53k)

Dean is three years sober when Cas comes back into town.

~~~

For a moment, they just stare at each other. Dean, once again, has to swallow the urge to offer to swallow something else. It's very hard to resist the gut-wrenching pull of want that hooks in his chest whenever he looks at Cas. And to think, he used to have him, used to be able to act on that want.

God, he's so fucking stupid.

Well, there's no point in kicking himself three years later for shit he can't change. He'll just sit right here and pretend that his fingers aren't twitching with the urge to reach out and touch. He can't do that anymore, and it's his own damn fault.

"Three years ago," Cas prompts.

Dean huffs a weak laugh. "Yeah. Eventful."

this fic hit me SO hard emotionally oh my god. don’t have much to say bc most of my thoughts on this fic are very personal but my god read this please

Everyone’s a Critic by Englandwouldfall (109k)

The one where uninspired chef Dean Winchester has a one night stand with the male (!) food critic who described the flavour of his garlic bread as 'closeted' and accidentally ends up dating him to try and prove that he's a kick ass chef, thank you very much.

(He may have a point about the 'closeted' thing).

this one is SO fun. dating the food critic who called your garlic bread closeted and lying about your career because you’re embarrassed and you want to redeem your food in his eyes but then you fall in love with him

Non Destiel Centric

gender? you mean that thing i have that pisses people off? by bigender dean winchester (homosexualitie) (946 words)

sam and dean paint each other's nails and dean abuses the technicalities of her gender. what more could you want? 

HELLO HE/SHE DEAN COMMUNITY oh my god the pure rush of euphoria reading this. oh my god. oh my god. 

the quiet road to a distant city by rottingbrains (1.2k)

Sam stares out the windshield again. They’re approaching a city, and she can see the lights in the distance. She’s past the danger zone, and she feels like the world around her reflects that in some way she can’t put into words- as if God is telling her that it’s okay. She did the right thing, and soon she will be past the lonely unknown and into the warm, forgiving light of acceptance. Or something. Come to think of it, the lights only look warm from far away, and she knows that the actual city will seem far less welcoming. Still. Best not to imagine the worst when it’s already going well.

required reading for transfem lesbian sam fans. fics that live in your ribcage to make your heart feel good

Four People Ruby Seduced & One She Actually Fell For (Or: Ruby's Epic Love Affair with Humanity in General and Sam in Specific) by tuesday (3.7k)

In which Ruby has a lot of sex, is not any kind of therapist that would be legal, and helps a few people out for her own reasons. (S4/S5 AU)

for everyone out there who enjoys ruby being a girlboss <3

Fractured Link by Trell (orphan_account) (5.5k)

Meg goes on, resolute despite the way Dean flinches, "He likes me. He likes me a lot, and I like him back, and that's probably good enough for both of us. But fuck me for saying so, Dean-o, he loves you, probably more than anything else on his daddy's green Earth, and you need to man up and give back what Clarence over there has been devoting to you for years."

this is meg/dean/cas which is not smth i really seek out but this was extremely good. set in s7 so it’s meg and dean and honey cas and it’s a lot of dean figuring his shit out and trying to forgive cas and i love meg a lot in this

[stxleslyds]

ROBIN #5 BUT IT’S JUST ME TALKING ABOUT JASON.

Hey, how are you guys doing? I wasn’t going to review this issue and I won’t because this isn’t really a review, this is just me talking about Jason’s involvement in this story.

I mentioned in a previous reblog (as well as in a old post) that I am not a fan of Joshua Williamson’s way of writing Jason. I think that he, like Lobdell, thinks of Jason in a way that doesn’t really match Jason’s origin (UtRH, Lost Days) or his current stories (RHatO, RHO, and other brief appearances), I think that Williamson is writing this sort of mesh between fanon Jason and a self-indulgent Jason that results in a very... bland and kinda repetitive version of Jason.

I have also talked about my dislike of his writing from a “romance” perspective. I absolutely didn’t like how he wrote the supposed “relationship” that Jason had with Rose in Future State: Red Hood. It honestly left a very nasty taste in my mouth after I read those issues and I just didn’t see their chemistry, to be honest, while I was reading those issues I felt like Williamson was writing an “unrequited love” thing between both of them (Jason being in love and Rose not at all).

That is of course my opinion. I know that many people like this relationship and I respect that but just as a heads up, I am not a fan of Jason being involved in any sort of romantic relationship with anyone. It’s just something that I would rather not see in a Red Hood story and that’s just the way I see it (once again, you are welcome to think otherwise).

Now, after I have said all that (which I believe is necessary because I like to tell you guys my general stances on Jason related stuff), I can begin my “review” of Jason’s appearances in this issue. 

Let’s begin!

Rose calling Jason to tell him about Damian.

Yeah, I find this weird. Since when are Jason and Rose talking? Here is where I am lost because I think that I am missing some information. 

This Jason right here is supposed to be the Jason that was at the end of Urban Legends #6, right? The last time that I remember Jason interaction with Rose was back in RHatO vol.1 #40, I know that Rose had a “relationship” with Jason in DCeased and in Future State (Red Hood and Gotham) but here is the thing, DCeased is a story that doesn’t belong to this or any continuities so it doesn’t count and Future State is set in the future, and a future that might never happen at that. So, where is this “Jason and Rose being in contact” thing coming from? If anyone knows, please let me know. 

Anyway, I just think that Rose contacting Dick would have made more sense but I guess I am missing some context here but hey, I am here to also learn.

The other thing I would like to talk about these panels is Jason not wanting Damian to be involved in a dangerous “death tournament”. Oh, well colour me not surprised at all by that fact, than you so much. 

Who would have thought that Jason would have a problem with a child being involved in a dangerous situation (me, that’s who), I guess that this is confirmation of DC not reading their own material because in one book Jason’s helping a kid “kill” the Joker and here Jason is like “WHY DID YOU JOIN A DEATH TOURNAMENT DAMIAN!?” (did ya put your name in the goblet of fire?!?! said Dumbledore calmly). I guess this Omniverse thing that DC has going on is helpful when you want to blame inconsistencies on something other than poor management on DC’s part. 

I just think that it’s funny. And also right on the line of OOC and in character for Jason, because I can actually see Jason being worried if a kid is joining that sort of thing, but I also don’t see Jason caring much about what Damian does or doesn’t. 

“If I can come home, so can you”

Good lord, I am not having a good time. I hate this. If this is your first time coming across one of my post, Hi! My name is Tati and I absolutely hate the fact that the fanon concept of “Batfamily” is being integrated in actual comics canon. 

This is so bad, what the hell is Jason saying? This man knows nothing about Damian’s situation, why would Jason not think that Damian has his own reasons not to go back “home”??? 

And what the HELL is Jason calling “home”, is he calling Batman or the Batfamily “home”??? Child, are you on crack? Honest question, because Bruce has done nothing for you, he has done awful things to you and he really doesn’t like you. 

Let’s be honest for a second, Bruce hates what Jason has become ever since he came back from the dead, Bruce hates the fact that Jason has a different way of seeing things. He only tolerates Jason when he can molde him the way that he wants. 

I mean, what the hell is this, why would Jason, after the events of Batman and Robin (2011) #20, RHatO (2016) #25 and even Urban Legends #6, want to go back to Bruce or any of his bullshit? Why? How many times does DC have to prove itself that Jason and Bruce don’t work well together anymore? How long until they realise that Jason doesn’t fit in their Bat-narrative? 

I am so tired of this, I swear, when will this end?

Jason and Damian have a chat.

I don’t mean to be repetitive but, what the hell is this? 

First of all, here we are again with writers wanting to encapsulate every Robin’s whole being in one word, don’t they get tired of being this basic? Dick is experienced, Tim is smart... how dull do you have to be? I this was your attempt at having Damian waste time then you could have had him say something more creative. 

“You are the most emotional”, what does that mean? I mean, i guess it’s true but how is that relevant here, or why would that catch Jason off guard? Is it because fanon Jason is the epitome of “bad boy with a heart of gold” or...?

Also, Jason returning the hug after such a wild conversation has me wondering what the hell is going on, weren’t these two fighting the last time they saw each other? Why didn’t Jason realise that Damian hugging him is off?

Jason is a dumbass.  

Well, he isn’t, Jason Nation knows that but he has been written as if he were a dumbass. How did Jason not see that Damian had ulterior motives when he “hugged” him? Jason, my love, you guys fought the last time you saw each other and because the Omniverse is a thing, you also tried to kill Damian...

Why wouldn’t you think that Damian going for a hug was actually a trap? Are you being written as an unintelligent human being again to make another character look good when you are easily defeated? Is that it? 

Yeah, that’s it. 

I don’t know what else I can say about this panel, like come on, give Jason a little credit, we swear he is smart DC! 

Don’t try to play games with Dick, Jason. 

Dick was having none of it! What was he thinking? Jason got his ass tasered and now he is like “Dick why would you let Damian play games with you?”. Why do people write Jason this way? Why is he the dumbass/comic relief nowadays? Is this why he was dragged back to the Bat? So he can be the dumb one with snarky remarks? 

How boring.

-

Listen, I think that this issue was good when it came to Dick and Damian’s moments, they are the ones that have more history together, they respect and love each other enormously. Their interaction were really good, very enjoyable. My problem with this issue was obviously Jason’s presence and the part that they let him play. After reading this, I know that I was right when I thought that Jason shouldn’t have been put here. It doesn’t make sense and it does nothing for Jason’s characterization. 

So yeah, those are my thoughts on this, as always, you are welcome to think differently! 

[aimmyarrowshigh]

Dark Greetings this Spooky Season Ms. V. Can we get a list of your favorite Halloween movies and specials? I know you have seen *everything* and I am trying to go beyond my usual rewatches this holiday month.

V. AIMMYARROWSHIGH’S CRITERIA FOR HALLOWEEN EPISODES

Does the Halloween element combine convincingly with the usual universe of the show (ex: Lizzie McGuire 2x09 “Those Freaky McGuires” is not good as a Halloween episode because it changes the rules of the Lizzie McGuire universe, whereas Community 2x06 “Epidemiology” is a GREAT Halloween episode because it manages to logically introduce zombies to the regular Community universe)?

Does the Halloween element advance the plot of the episode/series (ex: the reason Boy Meets World 5x17 “And Then There Was Shawn” is literally the best Halloween episode ever made is that it uses the horror movie tropes it satirizes to provide a CRUCIAL turning-point to the plot of the show)?

Is the Halloween episode in the forefront enough that it’s clearly a holiday episode (ex: HAVING ONE JACK-O’LANTERN ON A DESK DOES NOT A HALLOWEEN SPECIAL MAKE, LAW & ORDER 16x03 “GHOSTS”! You gotta go ALL-IN, like Bob’s Burgers 3x02 “Full Bars”!)?

Does the Halloween theme balance well between spooky and warm-n-fuzzy (ex: Criminal Minds 11x21 “Mr. Scratch” is too fucking bleak, but Criminal Minds 12x06 “Elliott’s Pond” has a joyous/celebratory tone to the ending despite being a genuinely scary episode)?

Is it generally a well-written, acted, and designed episode of television (ex: Saved by the Bell! 3x26 “Mystery Weekend” is seriously, not exaggerating, the worst thing I’ve ever watched in my life; Psych 1x15 “Scary Sherry, Or Bianca’s Toast” is a triumph of the medium)?

THE BEST, bar none, Halloween special ever made is Boy Meets World 5x17, “And Then There Was Shawn.” Period. There can be no argument, except MAYBE Community 3x06, “Epidemiology,” but I like “And Then There Was Shawn” better because the parody and homage as less… biting? And because I think it continues and addresses the emotional core of the regular BMW season better than “Epidemiology” does for Community s3. “Epi” DOES plant the seed (…heh) for the Season 3B major plot arc of Shirley’s pregnancy and Chang Deciding To Murder, but it gets some major minus points for mocking Yvette Nicole Brown’s weight with other characters’ responses to her costume, tbh. And “And Then There Was Shawn” is just fucking iconic. It is THE Halloween episode manual, IMO, if there were to be a textbook on how to write a perfect Halloween episode for your sitcom.

HOWEVER, I also have to give major props to Bob’s Burgers and Psych, as complete series, for their CONSISTENTLY excellent Halloween episodes. A lot of series that have multiple Halloween eps really phone it in after one or two, because they don’t have any more ideas for how to incorporate Halloween pastiches while maintaining the overall feeling of the series (tbh B99, while the Halloween Heists are excellent in general, is/has been coming very close to this line, and I think that if they HADN’T had to switch out the Heist to Cinco de Mayo in s6, they would have jumped their Heist Shark [and I think they know it, too, because it was lampshaded in the episode itself]) or they just straight-up don’t have any more ideas for what or how to have the characters they’re bound to parody or pay homage to a Halloween thing after they’ve already done one or two. And let’s be real: those one or two have probably been either The Shining or Rear Window, because those are pretty much the two that every show starts with.

Bob’s manages to make every Halloween episode feel very fresh and organic to the series, which I think they do have some leeway to do because of the nature of cartoons keeping the Belchers living a kind of loop of never aging, yk, but amazingly they’ve only done the “Tina feels too old to trick or treat, maybe? Nope, she’s not 14 yet, so there’s still time!” thing in a way that felt tropey once (in 3x02 Full Bars). They’ve been able to address Tina being 13/in 8th grade, and worrying about it being almost too late for her to keep trick or treating, in ways that were in-character and added to the overall episode in 4x02 Fort Night, 5x02 Tina and the Real Ghost, and 9x04 Nightmare on Ocean Avenue Street, without me rolling my eyes at the screen and going “TINA, EVERY SINGLE SHOW WITH A TWEEN IN IT HAS ALREADY DECIDED THAT THE AGE AT WHICH YOU MUST STOP TRICK OR TREATING IS FRESHMAN YEAR OF HIGH SCHOOL, COME ON NOW” which… at this point, is a Feat. Because like, I’ve POSTED over a thousand Halloween episodes, right? But I’ve watched and screencapped ::checks folder:: 3,905 Halloween episodes since 2014. Which is, um, a. lot. The ACTUAL BEST Bob’s Burgers Halloween episode is 6x03, “The Hauntening,” which is just… achingly perfect television. I know I’ve posted about it before (probably a couple times tbh) but the way that it aired originally back-to-back with The Simpsons 27x04, “Halloween of Horror,” so that the evening of Sunday cartoons juxtaposed eight-year-old Louise whose family worked so hard to scare her like she wanted with nine-year-old Lisa’s family working so hard to keep her from being too scared and make sure that she felt safe… reader, I FUCKIN CRIED. Little girls being deeply loved while also Spoopy Things!!!!!! IS WHAT HALLOWEEN SPECIALS ARE!!! FUCKIN!!!!!! ABOUT!!!!!!!

Psych, though, has the benefit of not really having any, like… central tone to the series? Beyond “friendship” and “having fun with joking,” tbh? So it’s able to do what a lot of series get docked “points” for in my Foolproof Halloween Special Ratings System That Is Completely Subjective To My Tastes And Mood, which is really just run full-tilt into parody and homage without really worrying about overall tonal connection to the rest of the season or series. 1x15, “Scary Sherry, or, Bianca’s Toast,” while it DOES fall victim to the way-too-common Halloween episode trap of making mental hospitals into a Scary Thing (they are a medical normality and a necessary thing for health for many people and should not be feared), is delightful Spooky Fun AND has the benefit of having Shannon Woodward in it.* We all know by now that if an episode of any show has Shannon Woodward as the guest star, it will by default end up being one of the best, if not THE best, episodes of that series. It’s just how having Shannon Woodward as your guest star rolls. I also really like, with Psych’s Halloween episodes, that quite a few of them understand the underlying thematic scope of Horror, which is “The Monstrous Feminine Is A Thing And All Horror Tropes Are Actually About Women’s Interior Lives Because Men Can’t Write Women And Fear Women Always,” yk, in a way that is neither TOO Actual Horror, which I am too afraid of to Do, or too trite and demeaning, which is the other basic trap that Halloween stuff falls into A Lot. Like, Scary Sherry is very much about women villainizing other women, avenging other women, and being in very specifically-female pain, even though Shawn & Gus are still the lens through which we solve the mystery, and so are 4x04 The Devil Is In The Details And The Upstairs Bedroom and 6x03 This Episode Sucks. But they give their Monstrous Females dignity and breadth, which is impressive, ESPECIALLY since they’re one-off guest characters. Also, 3x15 Tuesday the 17th is just plain funny and well-done, like, just give it props for the title alone.

*(Speaking of Shannon Woodward, another amazingly good Halloween episode is Raising Hope 4x07, “Murder, She Hoped,” which is among my very favorite Rear Window homage episodes and has probably the funniest gag in ANY Rear Window ep, in Martha Plimpton floating across the screen in the Grace Kelly silk nightgown and peignoir and announcing that it was on sale at Walmart, can you believe?! and honestly, yes. Perfection.)

Also excellent:

• The Addams Family (1991) + Addams Family Values (1993) • Scooby-Doo and the Ghoul School (RAISE YOUR HAND IF YOU WERE GAY FOR SIBELLA AS A CHILD!) • Scooby-Doo and the Witch's Ghost (RAISE YOUR HAND IF YOU'RE GAY BECAUSE THE HEX GIRLS!) • Halloweentown + Halloweentown II: Kalabar's Revenge • Mom's Got a Date with a Vampire! • Z•O•M•B•I•E•S (to a lesser extent, Z•O•M•B•I•E•S 2) • Clue (1985) • Coraline • Corpse Bride • 6teen 2x00 Dude of the Dead • Arthur 21x00 Arthur and the Haunted Treehouse • Lamb-Chop in the Haunted Studio • Arthur 8x04A Fern-kenstein's Monster • Arthur 10x02 The Squirrels • WandaVision 1x06 The All-New Halloween Spooktacular (I KNOW YOU, SPECIFICALLY, DEAR @plavoptice, HATE MCU!WANDA AND I DON'T BLAME YOU, YOUR REASONS ARE VERY VALID! But this is a good Halloween special so I'm putting it on my list In General.) • Boy Meets World 2x06 Who's Afraid of Cory Wolf? • Ghostbusters (2016) • Gravity Falls 1x12 Summerween • Leverage 4x02 Ten L'il Grifters Job • The Loud House 2x40 Tricked! • Mockingbird Lane 1x00 Unaired Pilot • It's The Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown! (Classic, etc.)

I'm SURE I'm forgetting some that I'll rewatch this year myself. I'm a big Halloween Baking Championship fan, tbh, which is on Discovery+ now so I recommend that if you like mostly-relaxing nice people baking cakes that look like bats and such.

I'm also IMMENSELY INTENSELY EXCITED for The Muppets' Haunted Mansion on Disney+ next week!!!

[black-swan-slaps]

My Musings About How BTS Made My 2020 So Much Better

I’m never one to do year end reflections like this, but I think I’ll make an exception for 2020, considering, you know, 2020. Plus, the New Years Eve content made me giddy.

I’ve known about BTS since either 2015 or 2016 (I first saw their videos in a Youtubers React video). I remember being impressed back then when I saw that their music videos had around 100 million + views (look at them now, lol). Since then, I would casually watch some of their performances or interviews, but never really listened to their work. The closest I got was when I became interested in RM’s solo work in 2018 (I really like his song Joke, and I stand by that). I think part of my interest in him was because he spoke English during American interviews, so it was easier for me to find a connection. Besides that, trying to enter the BTS world felt, well, overwhelming. There’s just so much content to get through. 

Fast forward quarantine 2020. It’s the end of April and I have been working from home since the beginning of March. Their carpool karaoke video with James Cordon shows up in my Youtube Recommended. The rest is history.

But seriously, that video is just so much fun, and it was really smart of the editors to include subtitles. Very few American shows will bother subtitling the members (at least early on), but they often say really interesting or funny things! I wound up watching that video every day for like two weeks. I then started watching them on other talk shows, which turned into watching interviews, to then their music videos, performances (hello Jungkook in the James Cordon Boy With Luv performance), funny compilations, and then other content, like Festa. One of the first videos I watched was their 2019 Festa. I had limited context for the members, and didn’t think I would actually watch an hour long video, but I did, and I enjoyed it. 

My May became a whirlwind of watching their content and listening to their music. Part of me was hesitant to spend so much time losing myself in their content, but as I reasoned, I had the time, and I was enjoying myself. I remember honestly laughing so hard as I watched Run, and by this point in quarantine, I had very little to laugh about. BTS gave me a route to escapism, and I happily took it. 

None of my friends are really into Kpop, but I felt so ecstatic as I fell deeper into this obsession. They would listen to me a little as I talked about them, but I did overall refrain from talking their ears off. (Now, whenever I do get to see them, I just give a simple update: “Still really into BTS, btw.”)

Point being, I devoured their content. Run, Bon Voyage, docuseries, concert footage, hell, I even watched American Hustle Life. As I learned more about them, I fell in awe of their success and individual stories. I’m honestly just so happy for them every day. I’m seriously amazed when I think about how much they have accomplished. About how hard they have worked, how many records they have broken, how insanely talented they are. They are truly global superstars, and they are changing the music industry, culture, and are leaving a huge mark in history. It’s just amazing. And what is also amazing, is that being happy for them makes me happy. 

Being happy for other people and their successes is pretty standard for me, but it’s definitely a sentiment that has heightened this year. This is a year where we need to spread happiness, as hard as that can be sometimes. But, getting this invested in a band is a new thing for me. 

I really appreciate their friendship and bond. I know it’s not realistic for them to be lovey-dovey BFFs all the time, but it is clear that they have an incredibly special, and rare bond. It’s something that I really admire. (The Vmin friendship was one of the first things I noticed, and led to me getting interested in the members personally). Being American, platonic intimacy isn’t really something I see a lot, at least on the mainstream level (and especially between men), and getting to see these men work together, laugh together, and express their love for each other is just so refreshing. I truly hope that they are happy with each other. It is so clear, that based on the crazy journey they have been through together, they have a bond that no one else will understand. They’ve said it themselves that, in certain moments, they can just look at one another and instantly know what they’re thinking. That is so valuable and special.  

Their work energized me. I started working on a major project in May, and I felt inspired by them. They gave me the energy to push through. Seeing them be silly while also working hard also helped me to accept myself and be true to my weird nature. I used to be pretty shy and reserved, and never posted online, but I started to adopt Jin’s philosophy of just doing what you feel like. Honestly, I felt the most alive in the first few months of quarantine purely because of them and all the energy I invested in learning about them and received from them. (And it was a welcomed distraction from the real world.)

It’s maybe a bit strange getting practically new content every day, but I have found that between official content and social media, there is always something to look forward to. It’s a part of my daily routine to check tumblr and look for updates. It’s something that has been so helpful as my mental health started to decline around August (I’m sure that with quarantine we’re all in the same boat). These past few months have been hard for me as I’ve struggled with the effects of quarantine and a developing complicated relationship between me, food, and my body, but at least I have had BTS to look forward to.

And I guess that is the point of this. I could honestly go on and on about each member and how I feel a special resonance with Jimin based on his gender expression, or how proud I feel of Jungkook every time I hear him sing and express himself, or how Suga’s First Love stops me in my tracks every time I hear it, but I’ve gone on long enough. What I’ve realized recently is that BTS gives me something to look forward to.

This year has been bleak. We all know this. But what is strange is that even though I have had my fair share of struggles, I also had a lot of self-improvement. Those first few months of quarantine, the energy I received from BTS inspired me to work hard on my major project. I took up learning Korean (I really like learning languages and have been working on Italian for years. I highly recommend TalkToMeInKorean). I started working out every day and actually have stamina to do physical activity (something I was severely lacking). I made strides in my professional life and am working strongly and proactively toward my career goals. Of course, even though I have been technically successful, I still can’t but help feel aimless and lost due to the loss of connection with my friends and peers due to quarantine. As Christmas day was ending, I realized that I had been using the anticipation of the holiday to get me through December. Once it was over, I felt sad. What more did I have to look forward to? The world is still generally terrible. In America, we’re still reeling from our terrible political and covid situation.

But today I realized, oh, there’s still BTS. Maybe it’s silly to say, but it’s true. Yes, I have personal and career goals I’m working toward, but we have to admit there is something so unique and fun about following BTS. That week in October where they released performances and interviews every day on Jimmy Fallon, plus bangtang bombs, was one of the happiest weeks I had. Like I said, their happiness brings me happiness. I look forward to following their careers for as long as they’re active, as well as their solo projects and careers. Honestly, isn’t it exciting thinking about all the great things they will do in the future?

[ramp-it-up]

Okay so you can answer this one publicly because its a funny as hell story.

Went to New York on a field trip at the beginning of 2016. I had just turned 21 the past November so. Yknow. Turn up.

Anyways, my friends and I got hella drunk in our hotel room, which was this bougie ass place right around the corner from Richard Rogers.

Anyways. We decide we want pizza. And me, being the most sober of the four of us, got to play Group Mom. And our bright, college educated asses forgot that GPS existed. And so we just wander out into the New York night and start off in a direction with the only destination being "pizza".

So on our way to Pizza™️ I accidentally bump into this dude. I, being my polite Midwestern self, turn and say sorry. Got a smile. Turned around and back to my friends and was like "Yo, you guys see that guys hair? Fuckin dope."

Got to pizza. Right across the street from RRs. Sat my children in a booth and ordered their pizza for them. We ate in silence. Walked back to the hotel with a detour to Times Square because why tf not.

Fast forward to July 2020.

I'm slowly being pulled into the Bay Boy fandom and I can't stop thinking "Why does Diggs look so familiar?"

And then it hit me.

And I frantically text my friends and ask if they remember. But none of them even remember leaving the hotel at all so they're useless.

But anyways.

Thats how my drunk ass bumped into Daveed Diggs on the streets of New York and didn't realize it until four and a half years later.

✌

AND YOU GOT A SMILE! ?!?!?? I cannot can. You’re famous! 🤩

[trickstermadness]

A Decade of Anime Suggestions

Wow! It’s Officially 2020! Spicy. I know I dont tend to make actual post on my blog but I really would like to give a few shout outs and suggestions of Anime that I personally really enjoyed this past decade! Let me know what shows meant a lot to you as well please!

2010

Durarara!! 

Durarara came out in 2010 ( the first season at least ) and I mean if you’re at least vaguely a part of the anime community you’ve probably heard of it. Its a show that is honestly all over the place but its a fun ride. Simply put it’s about color gangs but it also has a headless fairy and a man who can throw vending machines? Its wild but a lot of fun.

2011

Madoka Magica

Magical Girls? Check. Friendship? Check. Soft lesbianism? Absolutely. Death? You betcha. This was not the first show I had seen that was on the Darker side but it was the first one to initially sell itself as something happy and fun. 

Madoka Magica sells itself as a typical magical girl anime where young girls transform into frilly cloths and beat up monsters but this show helped to revolutionize the genre. While a lot of the shows that come after it that try to follow its formula dont always come off as genuine this anime put its best foot forward and had a beautiful soundtrack and interesting art styles. 

2012

what can I say, i didn’t hate the shows in 2012, but none felt meaningful enough to me to add here. Tell me your favorite anime form 2012!!

2013

Free! 

aww yes, free, the sports anime to get people into sports anime. there is no denying that this show is full to the brim with Queer Baiting but hey, It was fun to watch and did get me genuinely interested in swimming. This was the start of a lowkey obsession with sports anime for me ( not all of them made this list tho but if you want to know what other sports anime I like hmu!!)

2014

Haikyuu!!

Dudes being Bros? Aw fuck yeah. This show was one of the shows my friends and i watched together in High School. The Large supporting cast made it easy to have at least one (if not a whole team) character to love with all your heart. These characters helped motivate me in my day to day life, and I know that sounds kind of silly but their optimism was grounded in reality, it wasn’t some big quest to save the world, it was a story about High School boys wanting to play and win at Volleyball and their determination helped me a lot.

2015

Kekkai Sensen 

I have always been more of a fan of fantasy rather than SciFi but this show really does it for me, balancing itself right in the middle. You you like either SciFi or Fantasy I would suggest you give this show a shot. (or if you just like pretty animation and funny characters) The first season is a bit bumpy but its still a beautiful story! Its the kind of show you can keep rewatching and every time notice something different. 

The simplest overview of the plot is that Our World and Another universe sort of overlap, but only in New York, which is then Renamed Hell Salems Lot. But like even before this there were like vampires on earth? Idk the show never takes itself too seriously because it knows its plot is kind of Out There, but the main Character Leonard Watch is basically just trying to do his best to make money to send back home to his sister. Its really sweet but also really wild.

2016

My Hero Academia

Honestly you cant watch anime and not know what this show is right now, but its first season came out in 2016. The general Pitch of it is like a Western Style Comic Book Hero but set in the typicla Japanese School Setting that anime loves. Its really fun and even if its not your favorite show it defiantly deserves a spot on the list

BUT! so does...

Mob Psycho 100

While I couldn’t leave out My hero academia, it felt wrong not to mention this Gem of a show. Mob Psycho 100 is beautifully animate ( yes you heard me right, i think its beautiful, the art is weird but its still pretty and the animation is so fluid) Simply put its about a boy named Mob with Psychic powers who is crazy strong, but he doesn’t want to use his powers because they wont get him what he really wants ( the attention of his childhood crush) As a young boy he wanted someone to teach him how to control his powers and he found Reigen ( a conman who pretends to be a psychic) and thats the best I can explain without spoiling anything!

2017

Land of the Lustrous 

This show has one season and its pretty slow. There is a plot, i guess, but i have no idea on how to explain it in a way that makes sense! It mostly made this list because of how beautiful it is. It is fully CGI and it is stunning to look at. Even if you don’t plan on watching the show I would suggest watching the theme song at least.

2018 

A Place Further Than The Universe

This show is an emotional bitter sweet rollicoaster. It starts off with a girl who feels like she is wasting her youth and wants to do something big who then meets another girl who wants to go to Antarctica because thats where her mother passed away and she wants to “see her one last time”. Its a sweet story about friendship and youth and loss of a loved one and I would 110% recommend this show.

2019

Promised Neverland 

The promised neverland is a psychological thriller about children being raised in an orphanage finding out that they are more like cattle then children. The show is about the three Oldest trying to figure out a way to escape before their 12th birthday. 

That concludes a decades worth of good anime!! I hope the next one hold just as many of not more amazing shows!!

[lesbian-vmin]

when I first got into bts in 2017, surprisingly I focused on every ship but vmin. I never noticed vmin's bond from the beginning. I always seemed to overlook them for some reason. It wasn't until 2019 that I was like "yeah they're really best friends" but at the same time I also didn't believe it. I was also a victim of "if they're really close then why aren't they ever sighted together" and as sad as it made me. I concluded just like everybody else that they weren't as close anymore...

Especially after I since tae and the wooga squad always interacted. I just accepted the fact that he now has other friends he was closer to, and everyone seemed to feel the same way that they are not as close as before. And it hurt cos even tho I didn't ship them tae was creeping into my bias list together to with Jimin. But then during on promotions earlier this year, I noticed something. During the backstage videos at these shows, they were always hot and cold. Clingy one day and completely...

Ignoring each other the next. And It always seemed as if it was a push and pull. Jimin ignores tae one day then later seeks him out the next. It was so funny to witness. Then I saw the clip from the 2019 variety ball by chance, when taehyung was staring at jiving but dropped his eyes immediately jm looked back. Also the look he had while staring was woah! His eyes looked almost glossy. I felt chills. And even before I started shipping them, I was one of the non vminnies who always joked...

About how I was 90% sure they had kissed at least once. It's sorta a running joke on tweet. And then that video of them at the airport when tae dragged jm to him. I was like why have I never noticed these subtle things even though I loved to joke about them kissing cos of their clingyness. And I started to wonder how much of that joke could be true. And as someone whose a bit intuitive, I would actually be surprised if my instincts about them are wrong.

See? For me, I never got the feeling that they weren’t close. I’ve been watching them from the beginning, though, so how I see them and others see them might be different. (BELOW THE CUT)

I’m posting some thoughts here, but don’t think I’m arguing with you. ^^ Sometimes people get offended by how I word things?? I’ve had a few anons tell me I hurt their feelings...and I’m just. It’s never my intention....

First of all, thank you for the story~ I love hearing people’s vmin stories

It was a pretty popular joke in the fandom since the early days. “I don’t know if vmin are dating, but they’ve definitely kissed at least once....” This was something we joked about a lot since the early days.

I always thought it was funny that people used 2016 and 2017 to say that those were the years that Vmin weren’t close. Going on BV alone, we can tell that’s not true. 2016 was the year in which Taehyung was filming Hwarang and couldn’t join the members right away. Jimin kept in contact with him regularly. They did a lot of things on their own during this season, but I didn’t get the feeling they “weren’t close” because of it. They don’t have to do everything together. When Taehyung arrived and the members split up where they wanted to go out to eat, Taehyung decided to go eat seafood. Before his decision, Jimin asked him if he wanted to get meat, but he still decided on seafood. I think it hurt Jimin’s feelings that he didn’t want to go to the meat restaurant with him, and yeah...one might say that Taehyung decided to go to the seafood restaurant because he knows Jimin doesn’t like seafood and he didn’t want to eat with Jimin. But that’s a bit dramatic. He probably just really wanted seafood. There are other moments in the season (I have to rewatch it....I only watched it when it came out and once more when season 2 came out...so it’s been 3 years) where they are close. Jimin was worried when Taehyung got lost, and Taehyung joked a little to make him happy.

Then in season 2, when they went to Hawaii, you have 1.) Taehyung giving Jimin (and only Jimin) a gift. It was a snow glob with a couple in it. 2.) Taehyung’s letter to Jimin. 3.) Something we didn’t get to see, but Jimin told us about eventually. Every night, they went out and watched the stars together. All three of those things, to me, show that they were very close at the time. You don’t buy a gift specifically for someone you’re not close to. Taehyung’s letter was him letting a lot of things off his chest, and it made him emotional. Since he asked if the letters were going to be read out loud or revealed before writing it, I think he probably didn’t even put in everything he wanted to say. But Jimin understood anyway. And you don’t go out and watch the stars with someone you don’t care about. None of these have to be romantic, but they definitely show that these two care a lot about each other.

Like I said, that’s 2016 and 2017 going on BV alone. Don’t even get me started on 2018 BV which was a little different. Jimin seemed even more worried about leaving Taehyung behind than he did in season 1. I think the reason it bothered him more is because Taehyung was grieving at the time, and Jimin felt bad about having to leave him behind when he wanted to be with him. 

I think a lot of why people felt that Vmin weren’t close was because of heavily edited content. Backstage moments, we don’t get to see all of what happens. So to say that they were acting a certain way, it might have only been for a very short moment. When they release any videos of them back stage, they really heavily cherry pick what they want us to see. And I’m not talking about the boys (though they might have some say), I’m talking about the editors and producers. So while Vmin may have seemed to be “avoiding” each other during one moment backstage, after another song or moment backstage, they might have been closer. We don’t know. Also, these moments are during performances where they’re not always in such a relaxed setting. They’re constantly getting read to go back out and perform their next song, and there are a lot more people around them. They are very different backstage compared to anywhere else...and if backstage moments are what people are observing...it’s no wonder they think Vmin aren’t close.

Also, I’d like to consider myself pretty intuitive as well...but it feels like a bold thing for me to say...^^ I don’t know if you follow any Youtubers, but I was one of the people who shipped Dan and Phil forever and thought there might actually be something between them. Everyone call phanies “crazy” and “delulu” only for Dan to have basically confirmed that there was something between them when he did his coming out video. He never confirmed what it was, but they were “more than friends.” So you really never know.

[nametags]

But her emails...

I aim to be a woman of integrity. I’ve sat on the content I’m about to share for almost 6 years in part because it originally was a private conversation between me and a friend. A friend who happens to be a lead singer of a band, but a friend none the less. However the way people have been speaking about him and what’s been going on in the world lately, I couldn’t let this stay hidden anymore.

I’m tired of people claiming that because Patrick no longer uses social media (and hasn’t for damn near five years at this point) that somehow he doesn’t “care” or isn’t doing anything right now to help the Black Lives Matter movement. I’m also incredibly tired of people ignoring/belittling the fact that Pete Wentz is a biracial/black man in America. You really do not want the social media person in charge of Patrick’s account tweeting things out. It would be hollow and fake.

Below is both a transcript of the conversation I had with Patrick on 12/06/2014, a follow up message he sent to me 08/25/2015, and the accompanying screenshots. Unfortunately I do not have the tweet(s) that prompted me to contact him in the first place nor can I find screenshots of them to provide that context. An image of me and my younger brother Jacob when we met the band at Boys of Zummer will also be attached to demonstrate one of the people I was concerned about in my original email. 

The only redactions made were my personal email address and the name of a friend I referenced. Patrick deleted his email account at some point between late 2016 and early 2017. It’s only left in these screenshots as proof for those who knew the address before to see these were legitimate messages. I hope the content reveals not only where his heart lies not only then but where it is now. 

Allison White: So I caught the insanity way late, but it's a tricky spot to be in with what's going on. For most of my life, I didn't even identify with half of my race. I was raised with my mom's side of the family and it just didn't click for me. It really hasn't been until teen years and onward that I've opened my eyes to it all. And with that, I began to grow wary of authority in a way. Like I still believe that people go into law enforcement for the right reasons. The few times I have dealt with police officers personally I haven't been concerned, but I have noticed in the past few years that when I spot a police car on the road or an officer just out in public somewhere is if I look "white enough" or do I actually look like an adult who belongs in whatever space I am in. I know Trayvon Martin was murdered by a vigilante and not an actual officer of the law, but that was when I first started to fear for my little brothers. I knew both of them were the sort of young men that could get targeted and most likely justice would not be found for them. And then there comes this summer. With both the Mike Brown and Eric Garner cases coming back with no indictment, it makes it feel as if it's just open season for black people to be hunted by cops. Which is hurtful for the cops who are actually in it to protect and serve, and every citizen who now has to wonder if they are next. I hope that your cousin is doing alright. I hope that people aren't making his job harder right now. Just I know for me right now with all that's going on I am definitely on the side of the protesters.

Patrick Stump: Brief for now; I'm sorry in all that you didn't notice that I'm squarely on the side of the protestors too. That's a failure of my wording

PS: The problem is that I so poorly expressed myself, people thought I was balancing the empathy to be spread across the black community and cops. That's a mistake on my part. I'm angry.

I'm angry that Mike Brown's case didn't yield enough evidence to indict. But that case was a very complicated one...Brown had just (allegedly) committed a violent crime and information was murky. As sure as I was that Wilson straight up murdered the Brown, I understood the limitations of the american Justice system given how little evidence there was. That's the unfortunate reality of justice is that it needs to be just. It needs to be 100%. We can't go in with "I know in my heart." And so that case pissed me off, but I understood it. 

With Eric Garner however, this just feels so flagrant. By no accounts was he violent, wasn't he doing anything that could even be misconstrued as life-threatening enough to even imagine defending the usage of deadly force. He was cooperating and they choked him to death on camera. That's fucked up. I'm pissed. I tried to be polite and sit back and not say anything, but I'm pissed.

However, my reason for discussing the side of the police as well is that human beings are complicated. When we boil people down to simplistic stereotypes, when we create a narrative of "Us VS them," we lose sight of the humanity of it all. You can't reason with a "Them." You can only reason with a person and it works better when you remember they're people.

I don't believe in enemies. I'm not religious but I love the way Jesus preached "Love thy enemy." That's hugely influential to me. Hugely important. That's the empathy I mean.

The other night I was holding my son and I thought to myself about a black girl I used to date. And how, we could have had a kid together. Maybe a little boy. And how, that boy could (by no action of his own) be killed just for the color of his skin. Like, I've heard and read words like that before, but to actually connect with it (on as small a scale as that) was horrifying. Gutting. For a little moment I thought, all this joy and all this beauty and somewhere, someone's having a black baby boy, loving him and feeling all the same things I feel for my son. But I wondered if in between their tired diaper changes and their burpings, if they were saying a silent prayer "I hope you don't get killed by a cop." If they say it constantly because they know how possible it is. Or even if he lives to be a 100, what black man won't have an unjust run in with the law? Not to make it exclusively a male issue but seriously, how many black men are in prison right now in America? That's a disgusting thing. The young parent of a young black boy probably considers that and that's maybe the most depressing thing I've ever tried to understood. That's a horrifying thing. There really still is a racial divide in this country, and to not be black is to not say those little prayers. We live in a supposedly free country. What about the pursuit of happiness? Who's defending the right of that little black baby boy born somewhere in America to just be an adorable little baby without any pretense? And when that baby grows up, who's defending his right to walk down a residential sidewalk and not expect to get pulled over and frisked? Maybe worse? 

So I'm angry. Just plain angry. But I didn't want to offend anyone so I expressed my anger in the lightest way I could think of. 

I'm not sorry for having an opinion, I'm sorry I explained it so poorly that you didn't know what it was.

AW: All of this is hard, and there is so much anger. You shouldn't ever be sorry for your opinions, and I am pretty sure you yourself have told people only be sorry for how you express your opinions. I wasn't upset with you or what you said, I just felt compelled to share that for me there's a knee jerk reaction to the image/idea of police and why.  This whole situation has been tough and it's been inspiring watching people across this country let their anger show and demonstrate in the streets against it. It makes me wish I was brave enough to take part in it out in the streets and not just online. 

I hope this collective anger and protest leads to real change. That in 2014 we are able to do the things they were aiming for in 1964. I mean recently the full letter the FBI sent to MLK to urge him into suicide was released and it just highlights the divide between how much has and has not changed. There's a lot of value in what religion is supposed to teach. Love thy enemy, love thy neighbor. True love and care for those around you is a great thing and certainly something I'd hope people identified with. 

The past nearly seven years there has been this push for hope and change. Maybe the country is finally reaching a point to make it happen?

PS: I have a funny feeling this is civil rights part 2. I'm proud of the protests. I'm so grateful our generation is angry about something it should be angry about for a change.

AW: An argument can be made that our generation (or just post baby boomer generations in general) have been taught and fed nonsense to keep us compliant, but that veers into a territory that I am not completely sure or comfortable with. Overall I do think that this is heading a direction that the powers that be are not ready for in the slightest.

PS: Where did I go wrong? What do people think I said? They're so mad at me, and none of the people have said anything I didn't mean. I'm not getting angry right-wing stuff, people are just calling me a racist. What did I say that was racist? What do I think that's racist?

AW: There's a strong immediate reaction right now of if you sound slightly in favor of the officers that did wrong that you are racist. The swift reaction and need to dogpile on is kind of crazy. I think people took the initial comment to mean "not all cops!!!!" In the same vein as "not all men!!!" and that's where the rage is coming from. 

AW: Just to be clear, those who matter know you're not racist. You have shown both in your words and actions where your beliefs lie. I don't know how to calm the masses right now because at least for the time being its not going to get through :(

AW: You could try a blog entry on tumblr?

PS: Nah, I think I've done enough damage for one lifetime. I think I'll keep it to myself but I appreciate your talking it through with me. 

AW: No problem. I am always willing to be a sounding board for that stuff if you need it.

PS: I re-read my stuff; "I support our police," is the worst things said. I meant "I support the idea of police and the need for a police force we can trust on a national level," not "I support the police in NYC who are killing people and attacking protestors." That sucks.

AW: If you wanna try to clarify now you can. At least in your Google alert it only had one mention of he mess and it was a tumblr user supporting/defending you. 

PS: There's no fixing it. The Internet is unforgiving I think and the reality is, I said that. I didn't mean it in the way that it so obviously sounds, but I said that. So I deserve everything I get.

AW: It will most likely go easier if you let it ride out instead of trying to go out and fight it. That just gives the "he doth protest too much" air about it. Hopefully the energy behind letting you know you said something like that will dissipate sooner rather than later. And that it won't get big enough for someone to write a story about it. 

PS: Yeah. It'll sound like back-pedaling and glad-handing. Anyway, thanks for talking it through! 

AW: You're very welcome! Thank you for hearing out my side of it this morning.

PS:  I never would've ignored your side.

AW: Which is very much appreciated

AW: I say that because in the past two weeks I have lost a handful of friends because of all of what's going on and them being unable to understand how and why their words hurt me.

PS: Well that's awful and unfair

AW: It was but they were all from the "when I look at you I don't see black, I just see Ally" camp and then would go on to say things about stereotypes and "thugs"

PS: Yeah. Thug. "Oh that's so ghetto." Bullshit.

AW: When someone says "thug" it's always clear they wanna say the n word

PS: Or even if they're the kind of "Well meaning," person who knows enough not to say that word, they mean the same thing

PS: "Not like you. You're good"

PS: White America just needs to know what it doesn't know

PS: Or rather, understand that there are things they (we) will never understand. Not from a first person perspective.

AW: It always makes me want to scream. The erasure of identity so then the people known to them stay safe. It reminds me of something I witnessed the other day. My friend [REDACTED] from junior high is now an established lawyer. Needless to say he has been keeping up very much with the recent events. He made a post about it and one of his friends commented with "I wish you would go back to being my friend [REDACTED] and not my black friend [REDACTED]." Mind you there's no denying [REDACTED] is a black man. He can't pass in the slightest so the comment shocked and saddened me. Thankfully [REDACTED] handled it with poise and grace. 

PS: If you have to say you have a "black friend," then you probably don't. That's fucked. I guess I just genuinely didn't imagine how pervasive this stuff really is. Like, Pete and Joe and I have been talking a lot today. I was under the misapprehension that we grew up in a decently inclusive area. Just come to find out, nobody used those words around me. The whole time they were heckling kids like Joe and Pete. I thought racism was this thing that doesn't happen here. It's scary how much it's come out post Obama's election. Elected officials sending out mass e-mails of pictures of watermelons. I just didn't get it. Ignorance is bliss.

AW: It knows how to hide in plain sight, which is a lot of the problem. People are taught "don't be racist!!!!" Without being told exactly what racism is. People (myself included at times) aren't aware of words/phrases/ideas have nefarious ties until too late. 

PS: I think we get too caught up on words and not enough on what they imply. "Thug," means a prepackaged idea of a black male. It instantly limits his perceived intelligence, his perceived trustworthiness, his perceived value to society, and his perceived prospects in life. That's so fucked. We expect black men to go to prison. Not be doctors and lawyers. When a black man is a doctor or lawyer, we treat him like such a cool novelty. When a black woman asserts herself, she's so "Sassy." "You go girl." 

These little words and phrases feel harmless. They never were

AW: Those are the positives. Usually assertive black women are angry, mean. It's so fucked all around. 

AW: I really owe Pete for helping me be informed on Ferguson. He tweeted the hashtag the night the protests started in August and it helped me dive in. I am sure tumblr would have got me to it eventually, but seeing it from day one was a definite help. 

PS: You know part of my problem? I'm just not brave enough to say what I think. I'm just scared of offending people. Pete's not. He doesn't care. That's powerful

AW: It takes a lot to just put it out there. I am not sure if I had the amount of eyes on me that you do that I would be so "fuck you I will do/say what I want" as I am. Hell I become such a shadow of myself when at work with how quiet and polite I am. I mean I am still pierced and tatted with short hair so visually I say a lot, but then I watch my speech to make us for it. 

(Follow up on 8/25/2015)

Patrick Stump: That is amazing and I'm very flattered. By the way; Been thinking about our conversation from a year ago a lot. The takeaway is this: Saying "All lives matter," and "Not all cops," while literally true are contextually horrendous. Really awful. In retrospect I feel pretty awful about saying both. Specifically because "All lives matter," can carry a lot of implications. Who's lives? I meant by it that Latinos and Muslims are also unreasonably targeted/mistreated/murdered by cops. But is it as systematic or blatant as it is with darker skinned Americans? Not remotely. Furthermore, as a white man, I just need to remember how fucking easy I have it. It's easy for me to preach peace and unflinching patience when I've NEVER been a victim of the War On Drugs or the aftermath of straight up slavery. So there's a lot to think about in terms of what I, a white guy, have to say and do about the situation. But not a lot I have to say about the way it feels to be oppressed to the point of feeling like less than a citizen of this country. I shouldn't have spoken about it because I don't/can't know. Well-meaning white folks get to talk about policy changes and do everything we can to help, otherwise we should get the fuck out of the way. I'm sorry, really REALLY sorry to the world that I ever said either of those things. It's more than "Fuck the police." It's "Fuck this whole system." And as aware as I'd been, I hadn't realized how complacent in it I was. Anyway, disgusted I said what I said. Sorry to the whole world for being part of the problem

[atc74]

Soul to Souls - One

Square(s) Filled: None for this chapter

Warnings: Mentions of death, wolf hunt, Sassy OC, Guilt Ridden!Dean, so many more to come

Summary: Since she was four years old, Annaleigh has seen the same boy in her dreams. For twenty-five years, she grows to love the boy that has now turned into a man. Dean Winchester just lost the only family he has ever known. The guilt drives him to work harder than ever before. He works to forget the pain, until he meets Annaleigh and she turns his world upside down. What she learns changes both of their lives forever, but what will he do when he discovers the truth? Will he accept it or run back to the only life he has ever known?

Pairing: Dean x  OC Annaleigh (evenutally)

Word Count: 1974

Beta’d by: @amanda-teaches​, @katehuntington, thank you both for being my guides! Dividers by the amazingly talented @talesmaniac89​.

A/N: This was my very first series I ever wrote four years ago in September 2016 and I am so happy and proud to bring this back home. 

Like Dean’s scent? Buy it here from @scentsfromthebunker!

There are things that go bump in the night. Monsters, demons and the like. This isn’t about human monsters or the fact that we all have our demons. No, this is about real monsters. Vampires, werewolves, black-eyed bastards; things you have nightmares about. If your kid says there is something in his closet, don’t go look. Grab your family and run.

Dean Winchester and his brother, Sam, hunt the non-human monsters of the world. They were raised to be hunters. Their mother was killed by a demon when Dean was only four. Sammy was still a baby, six months old at the time. That night, their dad packed up and moved the family from town to town, doing his best to eradicate the evils that plague our planet. Heaven and Hell, angels and demons, God and Lucifer; it’s all real. 

Since the age of four, the constant moving and fighting evil was the only life Dean can remember and the only life Sammy has ever known. This isn’t just what they do, it is who they are. 

Their dad was killed by a demon about four years ago, when he made a deal to save his eldest son's life. That was the turning point for Dean; he finally understood his father’s need for vengeance, for justice. It had just been Sam and Dean ever since. The only family they had left was Bobby Singer - hunter, lore expert and surrogate father - to keep them on the not so straight and narrow path through this life. 

It had been just the two of them, until Sam inadvertently started the Apocalypse and ended up in Hell, in the cage with the Devil himself. Now, Dean was flying solo, feeling like he was losing his way. Dean chastised himself for not doing more; not being able to save his brother. Everything was written in the Heavens many millennia ago. Dean didn’t know that there was nothing he could have done to save his brother. 

Dean spent days, nights, weeks on the road; for months he drove. He followed one hunt after another, never stopping. Wherever Bobby needed him or whatever he could find on his own, he went there to keep busy. It didn’t matter how big or small the threat; Dean took it without question. He needed it. He needed the action, the danger, the adrenaline. Anything to keep his mind off Sammy. Anything.  

Ever since Sammy was taken from him, Dean had felt empty inside. The adrenaline of the hunt felt good for a moment, until he finished and remembered he was all alone once more. He wished he couldn’t feel anything, well, most of the time anyway. Until he met her. That was three months ago.

Bobby had asked Dean to look into a possible werewolf case on his way back from another hunt, so there he was in a sleepy little podunk town in Idaho. The view wasn’t bad, but he really wanted out of there as quickly as the hunt would allow. He checked into a run-down motel and quickly went in search of food, beer, whiskey, and pie, not necessarily in that order. He could already smell the rain permeating the mountain air. He just hoped it held out long enough. 

Not far from the motel, he found a bar with only a few cars in the lot. Walking through the front door, he noticed three guys shoulder to shoulder watching something mindless on the bar television. One bartender, one waitress. Easy, Dean thought to himself, as he slid into the corner booth where he could keep an eye on both entrances.  

The waitress approached his table. She was short, cute, and curvy. She had a nice smile, the bluest eyes he had ever seen, and straight red hair, up to her chin. Dean looked away quickly before her eyes met his. 

“What can I get you?” she asked, not too sweetly, just a little bit of an edge to her voice, like she had had enough tonight.

“Whiskey, neat. Beer, bacon cheeseburger, fries,” he replied without looking up.

Without a word, she walked away. She returned soon enough with the whiskey and a bottle of beer, setting them down sharply on the table. “Sorry,” she mumbled and turned to walk back to the bar. 

Dean sat in the booth, scrolling through his phone while he waited for his meal, looking at pictures he had of his little brother. He didn’t need this down time, thinking about Sammy rotting in Hell. It was a new form of torture, one he was a little too intimately familiar with. 

A chuckle escaped Dean’s lips when he saw the picture he had snapped of the drool hanging out of Sam’s mouth during a case in Utah. Dean kept scrolling through the pictures, landing on one he didn’t remember. He was standing next to Baby, his pride and joy, a 1967 jet black Chevrolet Impala, with Sam by his side, both of them with a cold beer in their hands. Sam was laughing at something without a doubt hilarious that Dean had said. When was this taken? He thought. Then it hit him: this was after Dean was cured of the ghost sickness and they all thought he was a goner. Bobby, that sneaky bastard, must have snapped that photo, Dean thought to himself. He kept looking at Sam in the picture, how happy he looked, how happy they both looked. Was it because he said something funny or was Sam just glad that he was able to save Dean for once? Dammit! I was the big brother. I was supposed to look out for Sammy. And I let him down. Again, Dean thought to himself.

A soft hand on his cheek startled him, bringing him back to the dingy bar. Slowly and gently, the waitress with the piercing blue eyes wiped away a tear he didn’t even know he had shed before she sat down across from Dean. “Why so sad, Handsome?” It was just one simple question but he couldn’t even answer her. Where did he even start?

“Oh, nothing you need to worry your pretty little head with, Red.” Dean took the plate she offered and went to pick up his burger. She continued to peer into his soul as if she knew exactly what he was thinking, that he was a failure. 

“You carry the weight of the world on your shoulders and you don’t have to. I can help you, Dean, but only if you let me,” she said quietly, as she looked around the bar as if someone would overhear her words.

He dropped the burger and reached into the back of his pants, his hand on the pistol he had concealed there, finger already on the trigger. 

“Who the fu--” was all he got out before she reached a hand across the table and gripped his wrist lightly, interrupting his anger. 

“Bobby called me last night and told me you were on your way. I was just about to give up and leave.” She continued to gaze at him. “My name is Annaleigh Newmiller. I am a friend of Bobby’s. And, I know what you are going to ask. No, I am not a hunter, I’m just his eyes and ears out here in the boonies.” She let go of his hand, but he could still feel her touch lingering on his skin. 

Dean was more handsome than Annaleigh remembered; a little more rugged and much sadder. But, the same devastating smile and green eyes were there, with just a few more crinkles around them. The same, yet so different. 

Dean collected his thoughts as she looked at him, her gaze never wavering. He did not put the gun away but kept it next to him in the booth. One glance towards the bar indicated the three stooges didn’t even know they were in the back and wouldn’t be interrupting anytime soon. 

He had to get answers from her right now, he didn’t want to walk away to call the old man and risk her skipping out. “Bobby didn’t tell me he had someone out here in the mountains. He didn’t tell me someone would be waiting for me. How do I know you are who you say you are?” 

Slowly, she took an iron knife and a flask out of her apron. She took a sip from the small silver bottle then handed it to him; he checked to make sure it was holy water. Next, she wrapped her small hand around the handle of the knife and slid the blade through the soft flesh on her left forearm, letting a bit of blood bead up on the surface. Not once did she take her eyes off of Dean’s. She removed the purple bandana from its home around her neck and wrapped it around the fresh wound on her arm. 

When she was done, Annaleigh reached over with her right hand, grabbed a french fry off his plate and popped it in her mouth. “Field to fryer... good, aren’t they?”

Dean continued to watch her, slack jawed, while she ate more of his fries. Finally, Dean picked one up and brought it to his lips, taking a bite. She was right, they were good. Hold on, what the hell? Fries!? She’s distracting me from who she really is. He leaned forward in the booth grabbing her wrist with his free hand as she reached for another french fry.  

“Why don’t you start by telling me who the hell you are and what you know!” He didn’t exactly yell it, but it was loud enough that it brought an unwelcome glance from the bartender, who looked at Annaleigh, sternly, but she just nodded to let him know she was okay, and he turned back to the TV on the wall.

“Like I said before; my name is Annaleigh. Bobby was a friend of my brother’s. My brother... Well, he’s dead now, but every now and then Bobby calls, asks me to look into something for him. I have lived here in the mountains most of my life and I work here at the bar for extra cash. I’m a massage therapist full time and I work from home.” She was giving Dean the whole nine yards. He asked for it, so he just sat there, listening. And, boy, she had a lot more to say. 

“I am 29, I’m a Leo, my middle name is Grace. I enjoy strong men and stronger coffee. I like country music and classic rock. Yeah, an odd combination, I know. I do not and will not put up with other people’s bullshit. Anyway, a couple days ago, a body turned up in the woods behind my house. The heart was missing. I called the sheriff, and he said it was an animal attack. Animal, my ass. So, I called Bobby. I already figured it was a werewolf from all the research I have done in the past for my brother, but I needed him to send someone, because, while I know about the life and the lore, I don’t hunt. He said you were on your way back to his place from Oregon. How did you like the drive through the mountains? Can I get you another round?” 

He mulled over everything she had said. She didn’t seem like she was bullshitting him, but maybe just a little reluctant to get into the thick of it. He finally let go of her wrist and put his gun away. Dean picked up his burger and took a bite before speaking, ignoring the questions she had asked him. “Well, Red... looks like I have a wolf that needs putting down. Why don’t I finish up here and you show me where this body was found?”

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Soul to Souls tags: @emoryhemsworth​ @flamencodiva​ @iwantthedean​ @jensengirl83​ @deanwanddamons​ @smol-and-grumpy​ @waywardbeanie​ @whatareyousearchingfordean​ @princessmisery666​ @spnbaby-67​ @shy-violet-soul​ @lastcallatrockysbar​ @winchesterxfamilybusiness​