#both Billy and Billie hate it but watch it anyway to make their idiots happy

[aglitchysylveon]

*crawls out from the grave and slams these down then goes back into the dirt*

Take the psycho killer Yuri/Yaoi and run.

[hargrove-mayfields]

Everyone likes to pretend Billy was never even there. Life goes on, people change, the past gets forgotten.

A year isn’t enough time for Max though. Right now it feels like the rest of her life wouldn’t be enough time, but Neil and Susan, they were doing just fine.

It’s almost like they like not having him around, that extra burden they couldn’t shake. The plan only Max knew was that Billy was going to stay at home until she was old enough to go with him so she’d be safe.

She knew he was fed up and looking at some local apartments within walking distance of Cherry Lane anyways, but then July happened, and Billy died.

Now it’s July again, and her hair is in twin braids of red with pure white ribbons on the end, and her and her mother are wearing matching blouses. There’s bruises under the bangle on her mothers wrist and one under Max’s own sleeve, and she just wants her brother back.

It’s a holiday they told her, her father (he’s not her fucking father, they never made her call him that when Billy was around) is a veteran, they have to celebrate. Better just dry her eyes and get over it.

Her mother invites all the family they have in the area over to their house for a little get together picnic, and they do their little happy family routine for a while, but Max can only handle so much of it.

Billy should be here by her side, flicking watermelon seeds at her face and putting ice cubes from the cooler down the back of her shirt, being an asshole to distract her from the reality of her family.

And that was that she didn’t really have one, a family. It was always just her and Billy.

Even at these events made for bonding with family, they were off to the side, messing around while the adults talked like they weren’t even there, and she knew she was a little naive then, but it stung more than ever, knowing that even after she’d lost her brother, nobody even stopped to say hi or check up on her, it was just straight into gossiping about the neighbors and those disrespectful bastards across the street who weren’t flying a flag for the holiday and family members who couldn’t be there.

But Max never heard Billy’s name come up even once, and not even in a respect to the dead boy and his grieving sister type of way, but rather, in the way that they just didn’t want to acknowledge his existence. None of these people had come to his graduation in May of last year, or his funeral two months later.

Billy was a taboo that the Hargrove-Mayfields didn’t dare taint their celebrations of freedom and justice with. The irony made Max sick to her stomach.

Or that was at least, until Neil couldn’t help himself.

His words are slurring already, with an excuse to party he’s on what Max would guess to be his fifth or sixth beer that afternoon, and someone just made the mistake of mentioning their own son, Billy and Max’s third cousin or something, and it spurs Neil off on a tangent about his.

“That boy was always good for nothing anyways. It’s almost the same now that he’s dead, ‘Cept maybe now I get some more quiet around the house.”

Nobody knows what to do when he says that, there’s a couple awkward laughs and one shocked gasp, that one was probably from her mother, but Max knows exactly what she wants to do.

What she wants is to watch Neil choking on his blood instead of her brother, his body being lowered into the ground instead of Billy’s, and in the moment she feels like she could be the one to make that a reality, but instead she just stands abruptly, a plate of the food her mother worked so hard to prepare for them she’d been too queasy to eat falling off her knees to the grass, and she says everything she’d bottled up for the past year.

“Don’t talk about Billy that way!

“Now, Maxine-“ Neil starts, but Max is livid, can’t hold back all the things she wished she had said before Billy died, when she got grounded after the funeral, when Neil started beating her, “No! I’m not going to let you do to me what you did to my brother! You don’t get to control me like you did him, it’s your fault that he’s dead!”

It’s her mother’s turn to try to stop her, slender hand covering her mouth painted red, “Maxine..”

“Stop trying to reason with me! I’m sick of pretending to be a family when I had to watch my own brother die! And I’m sick of being treated like I’m crazy for being the only one that cares about Billy!”

More than one person chimes in on that one, offended by the notion they don’t care about family, though it’s Neil that insists, in that faux calm, close to snapping voice of his, “We do care, Maxine. We’re all grieving in our own ways.”

She fires back, “Grieving what? The loss of your punching bag? You hated Billy! You don’t care that he’s dead, all that matters to you is having someone to hurt, and you no trouble adjusting to beating up on your wife and step-daughter instead!”

She catches a backhand to the face for that, and all the background chatter comes to a halt, Neil gritting out through his teeth, “Inside. Now.”

There are tears in her eyes that sting almost as much as the knuckle marks on her cheek, but Max feels like she won, getting her step dad all riled up in front of their family, she feels almost invincible, and she sneers all smug like and bitter, “I can’t go inside yet. I’m celebrating your service to our country, dad. You know, as a family.”

But when Neil's face turns as red as the blood that dripped from his wife’s nose the night before and he stands from his chair and drags her inside by the wrist himself, she realizes that it wasn’t exactly a win.

And when her brain goes numb trying to focus on both the repeated slaps and punches that explode like firecrackers across her skin and the way Neil is yelling and lecturing her until his voice is raw, giving her the same lessons her brother had burned into the back of his mind, she feels like she’s lost everything instead.

When she has to choke back her tears and apologize for embarrassing Neil and for making him hit her as punishment, she realizes, this isn’t a game that can be won or lost at all.

Max isn’t allowed to go back outside to the party. That rule goes unspoken, but words aren't necessary with the way Neil storms off without another word, slamming the back door behind himself. She’s slowly starting to figure out what the things her step father does instead of says mean.

She misses being allowed to be clueless, having someone to protect her or take what punishment she had earned. She wishes she wouldn’t have asked so much of Billy though.

Her own room isn’t safe anymore, what once had been the place she’d be ushered off to when Neil got bad had become more like a trap, the place Neil went to first when he was angry. Everything that had been hers felt wrong, so she goes to Billy’s room and doesn’t come out for the rest of the night. Even now that he’s gone, he still kept her safe.

There’s a welt on her face and fresh bruises forming everywhere, hot tears wetting her sunburnt cheeks and the pillows that smell like Billy, or at least used to before Susan decided his room needed cleaned and washed away every trace of her brother.

All night long there are fireworks going off, a big show put on by the city downtown has her shaking, unable to close her eyes for fear those distant explosions would take her back to the mall, bring back memories she’d never forget, and covering her ear with her hands.

The cracks and booms that shake her windows and her entire life, a headache and a heart break even stronger.

She tries her hardest not to think about Starcourt though, so instead she thinks about how Billy would’ve been proud of her for standing up to Neil. He would’ve called her an idiot, but he would’ve cleaned up her scrapes and held her through the panic attack after, and he probably would’ve liked to see the person Max was becoming too.

That makes Max’s heart hurt, the fact that he won’t get to. She cries harder, and she feels so alone without Billy.

Some part of her knows that she isn’t though. She isn’t the only one that lost somebody last July.

Hawkins’ cemetery was alive with flowers and wreaths and decoration, and more than anything the grieving. All of the victims had families, or in the case of the Holloway’s where their whole family was killed, they had friends and neighbors in the tight knit community who remembered them. El was still grieving Hopper, and Max knew Billy had people like that too.

Billy was popular, his death had a huge impact on the younger population of the town, but not only that, he had his closest friends, Steve and Tommy and Carol and Nicole and Adam from the pool, and of course Heather couldn’t be there, but those people were all keeping her brother alive.

As much as it felt like everyone was trying to forget him, they weren’t, and that brought Max a little bit of hope.

Hope that Billy would be remembered for the things he did right, and who he was behind the boy he had to be to keep them safe.

Hope that with his memory kept in the hearts of so many, the burden of grief wouldn’t fall solely on Max forever and make things a little easier.

Hope that the wound would someday heal, and she could look back on the time she did have with Billy, those seven too short years, with a smile on her face.

For now, she wraps herself in Billy’s jacket and comforter, listening to his music to drown out the distant fireworks, and dreams of the day when things won’t be like this, when she can leave Hawkins and all it’s bad memories and the “family” holding her back to live a life her brother would be proud of, a life that would honor his.

Max decides then with determination, flinching when a bright flash lights up her window, a loud echo through the quaint neighborhood, that she was going to do what Billy hadn’t been able to and break the cycle.

Tomorrow, she’d tell the school counselor she’d been assigned when her depression was at its worst all about Neil Hargrove.

[fumingspice]

kiss me hard before you go

Pairing: Billie Dean Howard x Reader

Angst because someone (not naming any names) *cough* @lilypadscoven is too happy to write angst. Such a strange excuse, i know. Like whose even happy anymore? That’s so 2014, Freya.

Warning: Angsty as shit! I think. Idk im usually a happy person. Mentions of cheating, mentions of smut etc. 

Requests are open!

taglist: @sarahp-stan @jumpoffabridge-t @sarahpaulsonsoftie @definitelynot-a-writer @bottom4delia @delias-bitch-craft @creepingwolfberry @thesapphictimelady @goodeday2u @that-fucking-error @saucy-sapphic @sarahp-stan @winters-witch-bitch @rainbow-hedgehog @pearplate​

You frowned to yourself, flicking through the endless posts on Instagram. It was some godforsaken hour in the morning and no matter how hard you tried or how deeply you tried to ease your restless mind you could not fall asleep. You scrolled on social media endlessly. 

God, what time could it even be? 04.27.

You gave a defeated chuckle. Even time was in on the universe’s cruel joke. She exited Instagram and went to messages. You couldn’t count the number of unsent messages and thrown out speeches you had started and couldn’t bring yourself to finish.

Billie Dean Howard.

The contact had found itself hidden deep in the archives of old messages. You hadn’t contacted her since December when you had walked away. 

Walking away was better that being the one left behind, or so you had tried so hard to tell yourself. In hindsight, the truth was that Billie Dean was going to end up leaving you anyway. Was it courage of conviction or just the simple knowledge that you couldn’t live knowing that the only person you had ever opened your heart to was going to leave you?

What was the last thing she said anyway?

Goodnight :(.

Always with those stupid text faces. Those stupid, adorable text faces. How did she have such a powerful effect on you that you could see Billie’s face in a colon and a bracket? Why hadn’t you blocked her yet? What was left to hold onto other than movie-like memories that had slipped away like the changing of seasons.

You slipped from beneath the covers, Your hair tickled Your shoulders. There was no one beside you for you to reach for in your infinite loneliness anyway. It wasn’t infinite. Why did it feel infinite? Why did you allow one person to waltz into your heart and make you home there? You reached for an unopened bottle of wine and paused. Billie had left this bottle there. You never drank unless it was around Billie. 

“Dom Perignon,” Billie told you. You were never interested in the details of fine wine. All you knew was that the older it was the more people liked it.

“Isn’t that expensive?” The brunette asked, reading the label.

 Billie nodded with a throaty chuckle. “Only the best for my girl. I thought I would save it for a special occasion.”

A special occasion. You chuckled in spite. The occasion in question was supposed Billie’s birthday. A party with many guests. One too many. The house was brimming with sets of both of your friends. You could recall reaching for the same wine all too well before being stopped by your friend’s girlfriend. Erin took you by the wrist and guided you out to the garden. 

“No one’s out here,” you protested. Erin’s face was almost forlorn. 

“I’m so sorry, Y/N.”

Sorry for what? You snapped out of your confusion. You could see the side of Billie’s body. Pressed against the wall beneath someone else. The anxiety had somehow eased when you watched Billie kiss another, fading into nothing because you knew that there was quite literally nothing that could get even worse than what you were watching.

You pursed her lips. When you imagined these moments, you had always imagined screaming bloody murder. You imagined punching and yelling. You couldn’t move. No tears. Hell, you couldn’t even feel. Erin grabbed your arm and trailed you back, but not before the sight of you, heartbroken in a red dress. had registered in Billie. She barely had time to pull away from her kiss and have the shock of what she was actually doing register. 

It was always a red dress. Red dresses end up in heartbreak. A goddamn blaze in the dark.

Now, you found yourself standing at the window that looked out into the garden. Looking at the spot where you had seen her lover betray every bit of trust that you had. What would have happened if you didn’t see? What if you had seen but Billie didn’t? Would you have said anything? Would Billie have said anything?

It doesn’t matter anyway.

Billie was wine. Aromatic, warm in her stomach. She was a magnificent swirl. She was the impossible to hide stain on your favourite white dress.

Every inch of this house had Billie in its essence. She was inescapable. 

It got even worse when a buzzing noise brought your attention to your phone. “Who the fuck could that be?” you asked yourself. Your heart dropped at the contact.

Billie Dean Howard is calling...

Your world collapsed for a moment as you stared at the phone buzz. Your head told you not to answer, your heart launched for it like a desert oasis. You let it ring a moment too long. You barely managed to blurt out a cracked, “Hello?” when Billie hung up. Presumably giving up.

You bit your lip. Your thumb hovered over the redial button as you fought with yourself. Maybe she’ll call again. That’s a huge maybe. Your finger jolted down unintentionally. Billie picked up on the third ring.

“Y/N?” Her breath hitched. “Y/N, can you hear me?”

You swallowed hard. “I’m here,” you stated flatly, “I can hear you.”

“I didn’t think you’d answer.”

“Honestly,” you replied. You felt no need for warmth. “I don’t think I meant to.”

“Oh. Uhm, how- how are you?”

“What do you want, Billie? It’s five in the morning,” You cut off. You could hear Billie’s breath falter a little.

“To be honest, I just wanted to see if you would pick up.”

You shook your head, cursing how well you knew the medium. “Don’t lie to me, Howard.”

Billie chuckled. “How can you tell?”

“You were the medium, but I was the human lie detector.”

“You’re a lawyer with an Irish mother and Scilian father. It would be more shocking if you weren’t one.”

You smiled, before catching yourself in an eyeroll. “Don’t change the subject.”

“I’m in town. I wanted to see you.”

“It’s five in the fucking morning.”

“You’re telling me that I actually woke you up? You were sleeping when I called?”

You bit your lip. “Yes.”

Billie chuckled again. Like it was a fucking game to her. “Well, now who’s lying?”

“What do you want, Billie?” You scoffed.

“I already told you. I want to see you.”

The audacity of the last sentence. The fact that you knew Billie Dean would come whether or not she was invited boiled your blood.

“Why.” It was more of a flat remark than a genuine question. Why. Why now.

Billie was silent for a moment. “I just want to see your face.”

Your groaned internally, another eyeroll coming into play. You scoffed. “You know the address. Find your own way over.”

And she did. The door knocked almost immediately.

You opened the door so quickly that it creaked aggressively.

“You have some fucking nerve. You know that right?” You snapped. The medium’s eyes widened in shock.

“Nice to see you too.”

You stepped aside and ushered her in, cold from the whipping air. Refreshing if you weren’t standing in shorts and a cardigan.

Billie turned around to face her. Tension grew, like insulation keeping everything in. You could choke on all the words you never said. 

“You look beautiful.”

“Je vais te tuer avec mes mains nues et dormir comme un bébé après.”

“I’m flattered.”

You groaned and walked away from her and into the kitchen. You didn’t know if you would slap her, kill her, or kiss her. You were just as prepared to strangle her as you were to fuck her hard on the kitchen floor then and there, kissing every single freckle and mole on her skin. “You have three minutes,” You muttered, pouring yourself a cup of coffee to stop yourself from looking in Billie’s direction. Your heart raced at a thousand miles a second.

“I just dropped in to say hi.”

“Hi.”

“Hi.”

You were unamused. “Is that it? Are you going get out of my life again?”

Billie frowned. “Am I? Y/N, you left me.”

“Because you fucking cheated on me, Billie Dean! What? Did you want me to pretend I didn’t see it? Pretend nothing happened? Do you want me to pretend that you didn’t rebuild my ability to trust people just so you could knock it down yourself?” You shouted. The words were coming out thick and fast now apparently.

“I was so drunk, Y/N,” Billie whimpered, her eyebrows furrowed. She was in genuine pain, you could see the guilt right in her brown eyes.

And you couldn’t give a shit.

“I’ve heard this a hundred times.”

“How many times do I have to say sorry for this?”

You raised your mug to your lips. “You can say it until I’m dead.”

You met the medium’s gaze. Brown eyes waterlogged with tears. Billie dipped her face in her hands. “I don’t know if I can go through with this again.”

You snapped again. “Good,” you said. “Because I’m done.”

“You can’t be serious.”

The pair met, closer than you had in months.

“No matter what stupid, thoughtless, selfish, idiotic, drunken things you said or did. No matter how many times. I have never stopped loving you. I’ve never fallen out of love no matter how many times I told myself I had. I haven’t gone to sleep without imaging your goddamn mouth on my lips and hands on my body and I fucking crave to hate you for it,” you spat, venom on you tongue and tears spilled down your face. “I don’t sleep, Billie. I don’t sleep because I know your arms aren’t there to hold me when I’m still awake at four in the morning. Because I can’t reach across the bed no matter how angry I am at you and feel your hair. I fucking love you goddammit. You threw that away. Not me.”

 Tears streamed down Billie’s face. “I regret what I did every. Single. Fucking. Day. I miss coming home and seeing you writing those stupid fucking reports that I know you hate writing because I know you hate your job. I miss seeing your face when you’ve won a case that has been scratching you for weeks,” she inched forward once more, her hands close to Mallorie’s face. “I miss seeing you reorganising the goddamn silverware every few weeks to keep the Fair Folk happy in the same way I miss seeing the way your mouth curls when you come.”

 You scanned Billie Dean, searching despreately for a bluff, something that would give way to the fact that this was all a lie; a gimmick for a one night stand so that you could just shut her out and go back to hating her. Hating the person you love is so much easier than having your heartbroken again. You couldn’t find that bluff. Even your gut-instinct that panged you when someone lied to you wasn’t alerting anything. Billie’s words were as genuine as her tears and it was killing you to see that Billie loved you. The lawyer had hoped- prayed even- that the medium’s words had been bullshit, sweet nothings that could be whispered into the ear of any lover that had fallen into her bed. But you weren’t just a one time fling that had walked into a casual meet. You had walked into her long-term girlfriend with her tongue down another’s throat. You had stashed that little red box with a diamond engagement ring inside even further into the closet that night, and that’s what had hurt you.

A raw truth in her words soaked into you. Refreshed you. They were the words that the ocean screamed back at you when you stood on the cliffside begging for a reason to go on.

And so you gave in. Almost, at least. You stepped forward into Billie and allowed her storm to engulf you. There was no calm here. There was a raging appetite for destruction and creation. What was that lyric? A tornado has met a volcano. Her lips ravaged yours to the point of being rubbed raw, the type of sting that bothered virtually every moment of your waking day, one that went on for days. You bit down on her lips, her tongue, her chin and cheek. Whether in was in spite or the desperation to seek and find every single piece of her that you could was unclear. 

Those fateful memories crept back, and you pushed hard against her chest. Billie’s lips, now red, white and swollen, pressed against yours again, retracting when there was no return.

“I’m sorry,” you lied. “I think there’s a possibility that I don’t love you.”

Billie’s eyes resembled a broken mirror, or maybe the view of a dying star. The thing about dying stars is that they died a very long time ago and you only notice years later. She nodded with a weak smile. “I understand,” she whispered, pressing her head against yours. She picked up her bag and turned to leave.

You stopped her. What on Earth were you doing? Let her leave so you can hate her in peace.

“Kiss me. Before you go,” you pleaded. “Hard.”

Billie shook her head, her face scrunched before throwing her face at you. The force drove you into the counter sending a glorious shock of pain up your back. Billie was doing what you had asked.

“Fuck you,” you pulled away and muttered, as if she had gonr too far in teasing you.

“What did I do?”

You raised your hand and slapped her face, lightly. “Fuck you for proving that I still love you.”

A rush of relief knocked Billie, visibly. She returned to your lips, much more gently this time, as if she were savouring every part of you.

“I told you to kiss me hard,” you whispered, although not necessarily opposed to Billie’s touch.

“I’ll do anything you really want,” she replied.

You paused for a moment. “Anything?”

Billie smiled. “Anything.”

You kissed her once. Soft. Tentatively. “Fuck me. On the table.” 

[imagines-by-a-typical-fangirl]

When I See You Again (Pt. 01 of 02)

Pairing: Billy Hargrove X Reader

Word count: 2.6K

Summary: After Billy dies, you're left to deal with his death, and has no choice but to accept it. Because he's gone for good... Right?

Part 02

{Stranger Things Masterlist}

×

“I had the worse week, babe.” You mutter, so low you can barely hear your own voice. In your shaking hands, you hold the last picture you took of Billy. He was smiling at the camera, well, smiling at you leaning against his car.

You remember that day clearly. The last class was canceled and you were both happy to be leaving school an hour earlier. Billy was already by his Camaro, you had your camera in the bag and he was looking so good. So you decided to surprise him, and he flashed you his best smile. After you took the picture, he opened his arms to welcome you in and kissed you.

But now everything you have is this. A piece of paper that failed to capture everything he was. You'd gladly go to the upside-down a hundred times over if it only meant you could be with him. See him, talk to him. Touch him...

“But I'll tell you all about it when I see you again.” You whisper, fingertips touching his face. Closing your eyes shut to push out the tears, you bring the picture to your heart as if it would bring any relief. It doesn't. The world is still cold, brutal, and you're still alone.

That's how you feel now. Alone, despite the kids showing all the affection they can. You tried so hard not to fall for Billy, but it happened anyway. But it also happened to him, and you saw as he left all his flings behind for you. He committed to you, completely. He changed for you. He's dead.

He's dead.

Reality hits hard, once again.

Falling back, you lay down on the bed, a hand covering your mouth as the sobs come. Your whole body shakes as you try to regain some control. As you try to stop, to get it together.

It's been two months. Two endless, painful, horrible months. But it didn't get easier, it didn't get any less excruciating. You think about him all the time, from the time you wake up until the time you go to sleep. And even then, Billy fills your dreams. Some of them are nightmares, they take you back to the mall, where you have to see him dying all over again. But others are sweet. Memories, the simple moments you'll never share. So you hate waking up. In both cases, you wake up crying, from joy or pain... But when it's from joy, it soon turns back into pain when reality hits and you're all alone again.

Sometimes you hear his voice. His deep, low voice, calling your name or saying something silly. And for a moment, one damn second your heart builds up hope. The worst kind of hope. Vain, empty, hope. You jump up, looking around for him, like an idiot, just to realize once again that he's gone.

He's freaking gone.

Billy won't come back. And you didn't even have a body to bury. The empty coffin felt weird, but it matched you. The box was empty and so was you. And so are you still.

Nobody knows, but Billy was making plans. Plans to go to college, to the same campus so you'd be close. Then... After that, you were planning how life would be. But that was before. Before the Mind Flayer got him on the night he was driving to your place. It was partly your fault, you know it. If you told him he didn't have to come, that thing wouldn't have got him.

You had to deal with him going insane, to watch as he tried to fight the Mind Flayer as it consumed him. You never doubted, you never gave up. You did everything you possibly could to save Billy. But he decided to be the hero. On his moment of sanity, he saved everyone. He gave his life so you'd have more time, time that you used to defeat the Mind Flayer.

But the price... The price was way too high.

After the fight ended and you finally had time to process what happened, the body was nowhere to be found. The monster dragged it away with him, Eleven explained. And you couldn't even say goodbye.

Now that the sobs finally stopped, you stand up, eyes falling on the single piece of baggage you have by the door. You drag it to your car and dry the tears away before turning on the ignition and driving away.

The plan was to just disappear. But you can't do this to them. Not after everything that happened. So you set up a meeting, telling them it was a code red and everyone had to be there.

When you stop by Joyce's place, you take a look at the review mirror. You look awful, as usual. So you just sigh and leave the car, heading for the front door.

The low voices reach you and you knock. It takes five seconds for Joyce to come to open the door, embracing you into a tight hug.

“Hi, sweetheart.” She says, pulling away and cupping your face. “How are you?”

“I'm ok. Thanks, Joy.” You lie.

“Everyone is here.” She gestures at the guys.

You're a party of thirteen, counting you in. As you walk to the middle of the living room, every single one of them comes to hug you. Dustin, Will, Lucas, and Mike. Nancy and Jonathan come together, awkwardly locking you between them. Hopper gives a hug and a forehead kiss. Steve reassures you things will get better. Robin offers a sad smile. Eleven holds you a little longer than the rest, and Max... She cries when you hug, what makes a few years roll down your cheeks.

Once the greetings are over, you stand in the middle of the living room, feeling like you're in some kind of intervention, since everyone stands around you in a badly shaped circle. You don't know how to say it, what words to use.

“I'm... I'm going rogue for a while.” You manage to speak, looking down at your hands.

There are a few seconds of silence before everyone starts talking. Questioning, telling you to reconsider, telling you not to go, and asking you where and why.

“Guys, listen...” You raise your voice a little, exchanging glances with them. “I've been trying, you know it, but... I just need some time away... To think.”

“But-but you can't just drive away like this,” Mike says.

“Yeah, where would you go?’ Dustin asks.

“(Y/N), you can't just leave us like that,” Nancy complains, stepping forward and taking your hands in hers. “I know you're struggling but... Don't do that.”

“I'm sorry... I'm not doing this because of you guys, I love all of you, I'm doing this for me. I...” The words get caught in your throat, and you need a few seconds to swallow the tears and continue. “I need to get away from this town for a while. Everything here reminds me of Billy and I just... I just can't.”

“Where are you going?” Joy asks.

“California.” Is Max who answers. Of course she knows. The only place you feel like going to is California, where Billy came from, the place he loved so much. Nodding, you look down, and Nancy hugs you again.

“I can't believe you're really doing this.” Steve breathes out, hands on his hips. “We... We'll miss you.”

“Yeah.”

“Definitely.”

“Very much.”

Offering them a small, sad smile, you dry off some tears. “I'm going now. I just needed you guys to know.”

“I'm coming with you,” Max speaks up suddenly and you turn around to look at her. “I don't care what you guys say, I'm going.”

Taking a deep breath, you walk over to her. Everybody is hurt, but you and Max have it worse. “I won't stop you, but I'm driving you back here when school starts. That's not debatable.”

“Alright.”

“Alright.” You repeat, touching her shoulder.

The goodbyes are long, longer than you planned, and you spend some time waiting for Max to pack up her things. She's alone now since Neil and Susan left. Hopper is her legal guardian now, but you're not sure how he did it. Well, he knows people. Powerful people who want him to keep his mouth shut, so he didn't have much trouble arranging this. You have been numb since Billy's death so you can't tell exactly what happened.

Once Max is back, you place Billy's photo on the review mirror with some tape. She gets in, giving you a glance.

“So you're keeping the Camaro, huh?” She looks around as if taking it in. “He would want you to.”

“I know.” Nodding, you look at the steering wheel.

A lifetime ago, you'd seat shotgun as Billy sped through the streets. A big smile on your faces, the music blasting as you sang at the top of your lungs, not giving a damn about the looks you got from people on the sidewalk. You'd stretch your arm and touch his shoulder, his neck, his hair... You always valued those moments, but now, you wish you could value them more. How happy you were, completely, wholeheartedly happy. You'd give anything to go back there.

“Hey. You ok?” Max asks, a hand on your arm, dragging you away from the memory.

“No, I'm not.” Max is the only person you don't lie to. The only person you feel like you can just say you're not ok. “Let's go.”

•

Driving is good. Especially now, because you have to pay attention to the road, to where you're going, and keep the Camaro from reaching a dangerous speed. But you're doing that for Max. If you were alone, you get the feeling that you wouldn't be so careful.

Because of her, you stop at night in some random hotel to crash. From Hawkins to California it's possibly a forty hours drive, and you were planning on going straight there, but then again, Max's safety is more important than the insane mess of feelings you are at the moment.

After four days on the road, you finally get to California. Max helps you find the exact place they came from, and you rent a small apartment. You brought all the money you have, so rent will be paid for at least six months. Then... You don't know. You'll think about it when you get there.

The apartment is by the beach. You just have to cross the street to reach the sand. Beautiful, truly. Max, answering your many questions, shows you the places Billy used to hang out. The places he loved the most. And, in front of her, you hold it together. But for many nights, after she falls asleep, you leave the apartment and goes to those places, imagining him there, as if you were stupidly seeking for him. As if you'd find him there. But, of course, you never did.

•

People say very different things about mourning. Or the process of mourning. Some say it gets easier with time. Some say it gets worse before it gets better. Some say that you have to do it by yourself, drag yourself out of the pit of suffering, and start walking again. That you have to move.

You are moving, though. You set some sort of a routine living with Max. You wake up and make breakfast, go to the store to buy what's missing at the apartment, you drive her to be with the friends she has. You're living a normal life for anyone who sees from the outside. But when you're alone, it all comes crashing down. Maybe you need therapy, you think, maybe you're not dealing with Billy's death the right way. For many times you wish you could erase the pain, when it's too great, suffocating. But now you changed your mind. Pain is the only proof that he existed. Is the only thing reminding you that Billy Hargrove was once here, living, breathing, alive. So you'll take it, for how long it lasts. Probably forever.

Taking your shoes off, you smile to feel the warm sand underneath your feet. It's early, not even seven yet, so the beach is empty. You walk over the water, sitting down a few inches away from where the waves break, watching the ripples trying to reach your feet.

Swallowing hard, you take the polaroid picture from your pocket, looking at it as the tears immediately blur your sight.

“Hi, Billy.” You mutter, raising your eyes just a little to look at the ocean. “Summer will be over soon but it's a beautiful sunny day today.” You should stop talking to his picture like that. But it's stronger than you. It's insane, illogical, but you feel better. Somehow, whatever chemicals your brain produces, makes you feel less dead inside. But it's like torture too, like poking the wound all over again, making it bleed, never allowing it to heal.

“How? How, baby? How can I do that?” You ask, to nothing and no one. Looking down at the picture, you know what would help. What would be a step forward, out of the numbness, the dark place you're stuck into.

‘Let me go.’ A voice, carried by the wind reaches you. You know it's just your head, but you can pretend it isn't. ‘Move on from me.’

Taking a deep breath, you stand up, walking to the water. It's cold when it reaches your ankles, but you keep waking until it's at your thighs. Biting your lip to hold back the sobs, you lay the picture on the surface of the water, pushing it down just a little bit.

It feels like a funeral, better than the empty coffin you had to bury. At least this time you get to see him. And this would be a good place for him to go, you think.

“I love you, Billy.” You say as you let go of the picture. The waves start dragging it away from you, deeper into the ocean until you can't see it anymore. It's gone.

He's gone all over again.

“(Y/N)!” Max's voice takes you by surprise, and you turn around. “We need to go.” Her tone is urgent, and she looks like she just saw a ghost.

“Max, what happened?” Making your way out of the water, you dry off the tears the best you can.

“(Y/N). We have to go. Now.”

“Alright, we're going back to the apartment. But tell me what's going on.” Touching her shoulders, I try to understand why she's so scared. So perplexed.

“No. Not the apartment. Hawkins.” She grabs your hand, pulling you and walking fast.

“What? But there are still three weeks left until school is back.” She stops when a car passes by, groaning in frustration. You're not ready to go back yet, in fact, you haven't thought too much about it. “But if you want to go back, that's ok. I'll drive you there, no need to be-”

“No, that's not it.” Max finally stops, running a hand through her hair. You nod, urging her to go on with it. “Lucas called me just now. They need us to go back. Immediately.”

Something happened, that's obvious. “Then let's go.”

You don't think, you just move. Packing up your stuff in record time, you're on the road in the next hour. You know what happened. The Demogorgon is back, or even worse, the Mind Flayer. But you don't care. You'll have something to channel your anger at, finally. And whatever it is, no matter how dangerous or deadly, you'll face it. For Billy. For taking him away from you. You'll destroy it, even if it kills you in the process. You'll ready to die if you have to.

[thorne93]

History Repeats (Part 14)

Prompt: Life’s hard, right? Well throw in a not so great job, a broken heart, and chasing a pipe dream in LA. But could someone come along to make all the bad shit disappear? Or is he just another heartbreak waiting around the bend?

Warnings: language, drug addiction, alcohol addiction, angst/heartbreak, adult themes (??)

Word Count: 2525

Note: Aesthetic made by @mrs-dragneel-stark-solo because she’s absolutely amazing Beta’d by @like-a-bag-of-potatoes and @mrs-dragneel-stark-solo . Brainstorming from @carryonmyswansong​

**Song Inspiration: I Almost Do by Taylor Swift; 3AM by Halsey; When The Party’s Over by Billie Eilish

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When you woke up, you felt like shit, and not because of the drugs and alcohol that only recently vacated your system. You groaned, squeezing your eyes shut. Did you really kick Hayden out? Were you honestly that far gone? 

Yeah, he broke your heart. He wasn’t the first asshole to do it, but he did stick around. Maybe that was because he had to though.

No, you knew better. He had enough money to stay at a hotel, but he stayed with you. He cared about you. It just hurt so bad to not have him any more. You hadn’t said you loved him, not yet, but you did, you loved him with everything you had and he just… broke everything. 

 Maybe you should go apologize.

Pulling yourself out of bed, you slipped on a comfortable shirt and yoga pants before you trodded out to the guest room, Hayden’s room. You knocked on the door before poking your head in. 

Only, there was nothing there. All of his things gone. His suitcases absent. No note, no letter, not even a post-it note. 

A choked sob escaped you. You knew you kicked him out, but you gave him until the next night. He was already gone?

So much for staying. So much for caring. 

No text, no call, no letter. It seemed as if he truly did want to be gone from you. 

Fine. If that’s the way he wanted it… Wish granted. 

------------------------

Months went by and you tried to forget him, tried to turn your pain into art.

Trey worked hard to get your EP ready. You had several tracks that you wanted to feature and he did enjoy your lyrics and tune. He was happy to work with you and the other members of your band to get the sound you wanted. 

By the time the singles were released, you were already becoming a hit. You hit all of the media platforms and your work exploded, sending you soaring to the charts. You weren’t quite topping them yet, but you were definitely being demanded on the radio and your Youtube and Spotify numbers were great, rising all the time. 

As time went on though, your addiction only grew. With Hayden out of your life, the glaring reminders that you lost all your old friends, and none of your old boyfriends seemed to ever love you, there was nothing to stop you from becoming nearly dependent on the drugs and alcohol. 

You’d never been like this in your life, but you’d never been at such an odd time in your life either. On every romantic and personal front, your life was a total flop, a zero sum. But your career, your dream job was finally taking off. The world was your oyster, you were rubbing shoulders with musical big wigs, meeting huge names and musicisinas. 

Between the complete amazement you were in from being discovered and having your heart broken for the last time, you were a mental mess. 

Hayden wasn’t just another guy. Jason was just another guy, just like every ex before him. 

But Hayden, he was different. When you and Jason split up, it wasn’t the man you mourned, but the death of yet another relationship. With Hayden, you missed him, not being together. You missed the light he brought to your life. You missed the way he supported you. You missed the way you two could joke about movies together. You missed how you could act completely goofy and silly and he joined in. 

You loved him, you were in love with him, and he pulled the rug out from under you.

That was why your habit of using coke was slowly getting worse. You managed to keep your job, for a while, keep the desires away. Then you started to get where you were barely sober for that too and just when your boss mentioned it, you decided it was time to leave anyway. You put in your two weeks and left gracefully.

As soon as you were no longer tied to the hotel, Trey put you in every lounge, venue, and club he could find. You were singing all of your songs on your EP. Every night you did a show, you got off the stage, got drunk or high, or both, and then you crashed. 

Same routine, every night. 

Anything to numb the pain of losing Hayden, of feeling like your life was in shambles. It wasn’t just losing Hayden, it was realizing you had no close friends, no one else to lean on. He’d become your best friend, your confidant, your lover. He was everything you ever wanted or needed, and he was gone. 

Neither of you had sent any messages to each other. It killed you, but you had to move forward, if that’s what you could call drowning your sorrows in a bottle or a baggie. 

Tonight, you just got done singing a set and you were hanging out with Darren, Veronica, Brad, and Tai. Unbeknownst to you, Hayden was actually about to make a stop by this bar. He had some contacts in your circle, a few people he knew in the music world that he asked to keep an eye on you, and if you got too out of control or needed help, they should let him know. He also watched your Instagram and Twitter, keeping an eye on your partying that way.

He’d gotten a few texts before about you, just an update on how you were, but tonight was a red alert from a guy that was somewhat in your circle. He watched you as you did a bump of coke, drink whatever was passed to you, and you were all over everyone in the bar. It was a sloppy mix of drunk-high. You held onto everyone, laughing, trying to crawl on the bar, making a complete ass of yourself. 

Typically your antics were cheered on because everyone in your scene was pretty wild, but even tonight some of them were worried about how you were acting. 

Hayden made his way downtown as soon as he got the text, looking for the bar. Finally, as he walked by, he saw you through the window. You were laughing, throwing your head back, hanging on other people, and trying to dance. 

You were a mess, and that was obvious. 

He pressed his lips into a thin line before going into the bar. He made his way over to you. He wanted to say he felt relief when he saw you, but he didn’t. He just felt worse. He wasn’t an idiot about your drug abuse, he also wasn’t stupid to see what had triggered it. He just thought it was stupid for you to get mixed up in this shit over him. He wasn’t worth it. 

He could see how it was affecting you. Dark circles painted your eyes, your clothes hung loosely on your body, you looked as if you were awake solely from the drugs. He hated how bad you looked.

“Hey,” he greeted loudly over the bar music and patrons. 

You looked over and saw him, your eyes going in and out of focus. “Oh my god, it’s you! Hey! Stay! Have a drink!” you encouraged as you fell all over him, putting your arms around him. In your current state, none of the pain that would’ve normally come from seeing him happened. 

“Hey, no, I’m good. This isn’t really my scene. Y/N, you seem really far gone, do you want me to take you home?” 

You pushed away from him, frowning. “What? No, why would I want that?” You reached in your purse and grabbed something, about to put it in your mouth. “I’m having a good time here, Hayden. You should try it,’ you urged giddily.

“Are you fucking crazy?” he demanded as he slapped the little white thing out of your hand. “Was that fucking E? On top of what you already have in your system?”

“The fuck is your problem?” you ordered, angry.

“My problem is you destroying your life and your body,” he informed.  “I’m taking you home,” he stated firmly. He started to turn you around and push you outside. Everyone started to look your way. 

“No, you aren’t!” you protested loudly, moving wildly, but he just persisted. He went around in front of you, grabbed your wrist, and tugged you outside and started walking you down the sidewalk until you got yourself free of his hold. “Jesus! What the fuck is your deal? Those are my friends. I’m having a good time!” 

“A good time?” he demanded, his voice reigned in anger. “You think this is a good time? You’re out of your fucking mind.” 

“Hey, Mr. Entertainment Business newsflash,a  party-girl image is great publicity. Trey encourages this so long as I’m fine to record.”

“Oh, I’m so glad to hear that your producer endorses you getting high and drunk, as long as you’re off the clock.” 

“You aren’t my handler, you’re not my parents, yo’re not my baby sitter, so just fuck off.”

He stared at you, clenching his jaw. “If you want to stay here and become like---If you want to stay here and party, that’s fine, but I’m done. I’m done with this. I’m done watching you ruin your life and throw so much potential away. I’m not gonna stick around to watch you drive your self into rock bottom when I’ve tried like hell to get you to wake the fuck up.”

“You didn’t stick around! Newsflash, asshole! You left! You left me high and dry.” 

“You kicked me out!” he reminded. “After I tried to approach you about your addiction. And I did stick around, you just didn’t know it.” 

“You didn’t approach me about it, you attacked me about it. Besides, what the hell do you mean you’re not going to stick around or watch me? You haven’t been around.” 

Letting out a sigh, he ran his hand down his face. “When I left, I may have asked some friends to keep an eye on you. I told them to update me if you were getting worse or better.”

“You were spying on me?” you asked, gasping.

“No, I just had people keeping an eye on you. If they were at the same party or something, they’d just let me know how you were doing.”

“Oh, nice to know you cared so much,” you retorted, rolling your eyes. You were getting more and more sober with the fresh air and the anger.  

“I do care. I think I’m the only one you know who does’ fucking care about you. I’m the only one not letting you just become an addict. I’m fighting for you.”

“Oh, is that what you were doing when you broke up with me? Fighting for me?”

He glared at you. He didn’t want to have this conversation. “Yes, I was. I was trying to make sure we were making the right choice.”

“Oh, spare me the bullshit!” you shouted, your head falling back. “I’m sick of this. I’m sick of the lies. Just be honest with me. You didn’t care about me, you didn’t love me, you wanted a rebound. You weren’t worried about the both of us. You’re just like everyone else. You wanted something to distract you from your ex leaving you and I was the perfect replacement. Then when you got bored, you cast me aside.” 

“You weren’t a replacement! You weren’t my rebound,” he yelled. 

“Then what was it?!” you screamed. “Because from where I stood, you and I were perfect, more than perfect. We could spend time with each other, lean on each other, support each other, we lived together, I met your child, we had date nights all the time and all of that just -- you ended it. Without warning. We didn’t even talk about it. You didn’t even ask me how I was feeling, if I cared about you. You just decided for the both of us that it would be better if this wasn’t a rebound. But it wasn’t ever about that. It was about me taking putting someone else before me like I always do, and I’m the one who got fucking hurt, not you.”

He shook his head. “I’m sorry that you got hurt. I didn’t mean to hurt you. It hurt me too. And it hurts like hell to watch you do this to yourself. You think I liked watching you come home high and drunk all the time?” 

“I don’t imagine it bothered you too much. We weren’t dating any more.” 

He shrugged. “So? Just because I’m not dating you, it doesn’t mean I don’t give a shit about you.”

“See, in my world, it does. You don’t break someone’s fucking heart then try to tell them you still care. You’re the one who decided to date me. I asked, you shot me down. Then, when I was really happy, when I thought this was real, that we had a shot, that this was something that would last and you just ripped it away. No conversation.” 

He shook his head. “Yeah, and I’m sorry for that. I am. I should’ve talked to you, but is this really what you want? You want to be so numb and fucked up on drugs you can’t function?”

“I can function just fine, thanks for checking in!”

“I can’t believe you’re fine with this. You’ve been so strong since I met you. Going after your dream, working hard at your job, you never would’ve given into this bullshit, despite what happened between us.” 

“Yeah, well shit changes. Clearly you know that.”

“Nothing changed. I cared for you then, and I do now.” 

You scoffed. “Spare me, alright? It was clear to me after you left you never gave a shit. I licked your wounds so you could heal and then you left me. Fuck off. You don’t get the right to tell me where I can hang out, what I can do, or when I can do it.” You got in his face, your voice low before you turned around to head back inside. 

He stood there more upset than he had been when you two first broke up. He wasn’t sure what he thought he would gain from coming out tonight. He just thought he could save you from yourself. He knew he was the reason you went on the downward spiral but he didn’t know how to fix it. 

He bit his lip to keep from crying as he watched you rejoin your friends and pick up a shot glass and knock it back. He shook his head as he turned to walk down the street.

He couldn’t keep doing this to himself, or to you. He needed to move on. He couldn’t watch you suffer any more. He had tried to help you. Every time he did though, you turned him down - hard. 

With his heart heavy, he took a taxi back to his new hotel and tried to forget all about you.

If only it were that easy.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Forever Tag:

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@marvel-imagines-yes-please​​

@missinstantgratification​​

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Hayden Christensen:

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History Repeats:

@multifandomblog315​​

[addictofsupernatural]

Emotions (pt. 12)

Billy Hargrove x reader

Summary: Billy does his best to win you back, but a certain person keeps getting in the way.

Word Count: 2485

Chapter 1 • Chp. Masterlist

Billy was not giving up. He was set on winning you back, and started by waiting at your house to take you to school. At first you tried to ignore him and just walk, but he kept driving next to you and you felt too guilty. You'd end up getting inside and seeing his relieving smile. Hopper did always say that your conscious would screw you over some day.

During biology he was constantly trying to make you laugh. His charming jokes and quick wit would eventually get to you, and you would end up cracking a smile. You couldn't help it; you just thought it was funny how much of a child he could be, even with his beautiful grin.

During lunch you went with Steve Harrington. It pissed him off, but he needed to learn that you're entitled to hang out with anyone you want. He just didn't understand why it had to be him. When Billy passed by you in the halls or anywhere at lunch, he would always smile and wink at you. He'd see you blush, which was all he needed.

Billy had learned to have patience. He needed to be patient with you when you felt insecure about yourself, or when you didn't understand something simple. Looking back at it now, he could see why you had trouble adjusting to normalcy. He would now need to be his most patient self, because right now you were doing something you thought would be best for Billy, and he saw that you were trying your hardest to be better for him by trying to have him move on. He just needed enough patience for you to realize that he wasn't going to move on from the love of his life.

When Steve caught on that Billy's dumb ass face was actually working on you, he knew that he had to do something as your self proclaimed best friend. He invited Jonathan over to see what to do about it, pacing the floor and acting like he was planning a war strategy.

"We have to do something about this!" He said to Jonathan in the living room, with you easily listening from your bedroom easily listening. Hearing the two of them was like having a devil and angel on your shoulder. "Okay, what's our plan?"

"I don't know man. I think Billy's okay now, if I'm being honest. He's actually sorry, and he's okay now with y/n's powers. Maybe we should give him a chance?"

"Are you kidding me? And let my friend get hurt again? No, she's not going to fall for that dickhead again. Someone has to protect her; she's too innocent."

"Hey, dumbasses," You said from your door frame. "If you don't want me to listen in then maybe you shouldn't be talking about this crap in my house."

"See what I mean?! He taught her how to curse!" He then pointed to you. "And shut up. Your house is comfy, okay?"

"He's actually not wrong about that." Jonathan mumbled.

You scoffed. "I told you guys, we're not getting back together. And shouldn't I be able to make my own decisions anyways?"

"No, you need the guidance of a loyal friend." You rolled your eyes at his serious face, which then lit up with an idea. "I know exactly how to get him to back off! We need to get him jealous, and he'll get so pissed that he'll give up."

"You sure you don't just wanna see him get pissed?" Jonathan asked, scoffing as well.

Steve gave him a pat on the back. "That, my friend, is an added perk." He then gave the two of you a teasing smile.

The next morning when Billy went to your house to pick you up for school, he saw that Steve's car was parked there. He watched in disgust as the two of you came out, with your head down as you went into his car. Steve looked back, smiling and nodding at Billy. "You ever tried her pancakes?" He called out. "Delicious!"

He then got into the car too. You didn't look at Steve when saying, "You don't have to be an ass about it."

"You want him to move on or not?" Steve asked as you silently nodded.

Billy gripped his steering wheel as his breaths became deeper. You used to make him pancakes. You used to sit on his lap and feed it to him. Sometimes you'd lick the syrup off his lips. You'd never do that with that jerk off Steve, but the thought of you making something for Steve instead of him got Billy so fucking pissed.

At school, Billy thought about his options. He could still try to keep it up with strong flirting, but that dick off Steve would probably also start flirting. You hate conflict, and you'd hate that situation. Fucking Steve Harrington. How the hell was he supposed to win you back now?

It was time for him to really look back and think. When you two first got together, how did it happen? Back then, it happened slowly as you saw that his attention was focused on you. This was when you were just friends. Bingo.

When he saw you enter fourth period, he gently smiled and nodded his head. "Hey." You put your head down. "So, I was thinking. I'm sorry for going against what you want, and I think we should start over. As friends?"

This was painful for you, and you knew that you should just reject him so he can move on and be happy with someone else in the future. But you were dying to talk to him again; the conversations you missed so much. "Okay." You squeaked.

Unlike when you first met, this time he was the talker in the conversation and you were the listener. He rambled on and made jokes, and you responded with a smile or a nod, occasionally making a comment.

Once class ended the two of you were still talking when Steve walked into the classroom and smacked your shared desk, startling the both of you. "We should head over to lunch now. Let's go y/n."

Billy stood tall. "Sure thing. Let's all go."

"Let's not fight guys. Please." You quietly said.

Steve glanced at you before nodding. "Whatever you say. C'mon." He then put his hand on the small of your back to lead you out. Billy trailed behind, his nostrils flared and his teeth gritted.

You walked over to the basketball bleachers, with the two boys both ending up linking to each of your arms. Instead of sitting at you and Billy's usual spot, you sat on the other end. Billy took this as a sign that your memories together were still sacred to you. In actuality you knew it would fuel his anger if Steve sat at your 'special spot' that he loved so much.

"So, you two are, like, what? Friends now?" Steve asked, attitude in his voice.

"We never stopped being friends." Billy gave a shit eating grin.

"Well y'know, with kicking her out of your house and not accepting her for who she is I figured you guys were having a little trouble in paradise." He gave a shrug.

"Steve." You hissed.

"No, he's right." You whipped your head to Billy. "I did act like a jerk, but y'know what? Our bond is so fucking strong that I realized I don't care about any of it. She does that to me, I guess. Always reeling me back in, huh sweetheart?"

"As her best friend, I don't feel comfortable with you calling her that."

Billy gave a tch. "I'm her best friend."

You stood up out of anger and started walking away. "Where you going?" They said in unison.

"To Jonathan and Nancy." You turned to look back at them.

"You hate being around Nancy." Billy said.

"And you know Jonathan won't stand up to her."

"Yeah. Well, that should tell you how crappy I feel around you two right now." And with that you left.

"Very nice, ass wipe." Billy said as he shoved Steve.

"Really? This is my fault?" Billy only glared back at him. "Why can't you just leave her alone?"

"Why the fuck can't you just leave me alone?"

The two of them quickly got up and stomped away from each other, with Billy going over to an ecstatic Tommy and Steve trailing shamefully behind you as Nancy lectured you about not listening to her.

After school you slipped away from both boys and used a payphone to call Hopper. When he pulled up, you began walking over to his car before you heard Billy and Steve call out your name in unison. You started to speed walk before breaking out into a run when you saw them running over to you. You got into the car and slammed it shut. "Drive! Drive!"

Hopper, being flustered by your hurried tone, quickly drove off. "You wanna tell me why the hell we just Marty McFlyed the crap out of there?"

You let out a loud groan, ready to rant. "Ughhh! It's Billy and Steve! They keep fighting with each other, and it's about me. I hate that. They know I hate that, and yet they still have this alpha male bs going on. It's so stupid! I just want Billy to calm down, and Steve to tone it down! This whole thing is so dumb." You then quickly turned your head to Hopper, who had been listening helplessly, and caused him to jerk his head a bit in surprise. "What do you think?"

He was caught off guard by the question. "Uh, well... take a break from both of them. They sound like they're doing idiot things for good reasons, but they're jackasses if they're making you like this. Maybe you could try to be by yourself for a while."

You let out a breath and grinned. No matter what El or Mike said, you knew Hopper listened and you knew he was a smart person. In actuality, Hopper just wanted to say that these two were jackasses and that he should just arrest them for a day or two, but he knew you would get mad at him too, with your emotions all over the place.

You gave him a hug as he pulled up to your house. "Hopper you're a genius."

You happily got out of the car and went inside to your room, where Hopper smiled. He hoped you knew that he was there for you. That he could be your dad.

As you did your homework that night you got a call from your phone. When you answered, your face fell. "What do you want Steve?"

"Um, so you got home safe then?" He attempted to lighten the mood.

You sighed. "Goodbye Steve."

"No no no, wait! I'm sorry, I wanted to say that I'm sorry. We just really need to get him off of your ass, y'know?"

"I mean, he said he just wanted to be friends. Maybe we could go back to being just acquaintances?"

"God five, you'd think all things considered with you that you wouldn't be so stupid about this." Steve said this out of rage, but after hearing your soft gasp over the phone, he knew he just fucked up.

"Are you kidding me right now? You know what Steve, you'd think all things considered with you that you'd understand how hard it is for me to let him go, and how badly I want him back even though I know it's best to let him be."

"Five-"

"Don't ever call me that again!" You then hung up.

You breathed hard, trying to calm yourself down. You're not a crybaby. People who cry all the time are stupid, and you're not stupid. The damn telephone rang again, and you picked it up. "Damnit Steve, leave me alone!"

"Whoa there sweetheart, wrong guy."

You let out an involuntary breath of relief when you heard Billy's voice. It felt good to hear from him, but it just pained you in a worse way. He's trying his best to be perfect when you feel like you're too fucked up to even be allowed to have a boyfriend.

"Hi Billy." You said quietly, tears forming and your nose beginning to sting.

"What's wrong sweetheart?"

You sucked it a hard breath. "People keep telling me things that hurt."

You were really struggling to hold back the tears. "Y/n–"

"I have to go!" You slammed the phone back. You rolled up into a ball, and cried. Maybe you are stupid.

Once you exhausted yourself and stopped crying, you saw headlights flashing outside. You confusedly and sluggishly got up, since everyone was asleep by now, and saw Billy's car. He got out and said nothing, swiftly bringing you in for a hug. You hugged back. "C'mon, let's get you inside."

You only nodded and let him guide you. You knew that this wasn't right, but you were too damn exhausted with everything to do anything about it. He kicked off his shoes where he normally did, and took you to your room. He laid you down on your bed, and got in with you.

"You shouldn't be here." You quietly said as he tugged you into his chest. You didn't do anything to stop him, and instead embraced the smell you missed so much.

"Course I should." He took a deep breath, before continuing. "I'm sorry for adding all this stress to you. I know you've always been my little rule follower."

You felt the tears begin to sting in your eyes again. "Y'know, Hopper's always told us to follow the rules. That people who don't follow the rules are stupid, and we're not stupid. We can't be, and we won't be." You looked up at him. "I can't even follow my own rules. Why am I so stupid? How do I even do better?"

"You're not stupid. Don't ever say that about yourself again. Okay?" He spoke sternly, and you nodded your head while he wiped away a tear with his thumb. "You're just confused. It's okay to be confused about your feelings. Just as long as you don't have any for cock sucker Steve." You could practically hear his smile.

"Mm. You don't really think I'd have feelings for him, do you?"

"Nah, he's too vanilla."

You snuggled into his chest. "So are you, but only in private."

"Only with you baby." He grabbed your chin, and kissed your lips for a second before you pulled back. "Too soon, got it. Do you want me to leave?"

You sighed, knowing it's better if he did. But you felt so safe with him there. "After I fall asleep? Please."

"Course doll." And the two of you stayed like that until you fell asleep, when Billy gently kissed your unconscious lips and silently slipped out of the house and off to his. He went to sleep, content that he could still make you feel safe.

---

Tag List:

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[mampysou]

Day 9 of Harringrove April!

Thanks to everyone reading or reblogging or liking this! It's awesome of you.

Also read on AO3

Blue

“Steve?” Steve turned his head to look at the voice who spoke to him. His mother stood in his doorway looking at him. Her eyes were thoughtful. “You got the blues baby?”

Steve was nineteen, he didn’t need his mom calling him baby anymore but today he could do something from his distant parents. He was surprised she had even noticed he wasn’t feeling like himself.

“Yeah, Mom. I think I do.” He muttered, trying to hold back the crack in his voice he felt coming.

“Well,” she started, not moving an inch from the door way. “Don’t let your father see you like this. It will just make him cranky and we are heading to the club tonight. I don’t want him to ruin my evening.”

He can read between the lines. He know what she is saying. Don’t fuck it up Steve. I want a nice evening with your father, so don’t mess this up for me. She doesn’t care he is feeling shit or ‘blue’ just that he does ruin it for anyone else.

He was disappointed in himself for even believe she cared about him. He should know by now that that type of thing doesn’t happen in the Harrington house. Show no signs of weakness or it could be turned against you.

He knows he is being stupid anyway. He and Billy were only together a short while before the sunshine boy had to return home. Steve understood. He did but he still missed him. Max kept home updated on how he was which he really appreciated but he also hated to hear. To hear how Billy had found a job at the surf shack with an old friend, how he had cut his hair, how he had picked up a bass for the first time in years and could regularly be found on the beach with his friends singing to all the new songs from his favourite rock bands. Bands Steve hated but listened to just to watch the way Billy came alive, moving with the beat and drumming his hands, fingers flying along with the bass that Steve could barely hear.

Billy rang him once. Steve was so excited to hear his voice, to listen to him speak about what he was doing and all the things max had told him, but that wasn’t what Steve got. Billy sounded wrong. He was stilted, cold and sad. Like he was falling apart and missing him just as much as Steve missed Billy. Even though they both said it should end. They both said it was too far, plus it was probably not going to go anywhere any way.

Steve had the number Billy gave him in the top of his drawer by his bed. Maybe, when his parents left, he could ring him. Just to see he was okay. That he was still free and happy. He took a moment to come to the decision and nodded to himself. He would call when they have left.

An hour later, Steve heard the door shut proceeded by a quiet goodbye from his mother. He sat up immediately and reached into the draw pulling out the scrap of paper. He didn’t need it. He had long since memorized the digits on the lines he had scribbled down nearly two months ago.

Padding out into the hall in just his socks and soft sweats, he leant against the wall and picked up the phone. His fingers hovered over the digits waiting to be pressed. The numbers burnt into his mind floated in his vision. So why couldn’t he press them? Why was he so nervous? He felt sick. He felt the wave of despair wash from the tips of his ears, to the soles of his feet making him feel heavy.

He stared so long his eyes blurred, until he started punching in the numbers needing to hear the only voice he craved right now.

It rang three time before some one picked up.

“’ello?” the voice asked sounding tired.

“Hey. Is Billy there?” Steve asked, trying and failing to keep his emotion from his voice.

“Hargrove? Nah man he left like a week ago.” The voice said.

“He left?” Steve asked, disbelieving. He wouldn’t leave with out telling Max or him where he had gone. Would he?

“Yeah dude. Wouldn’t shut up about a dude he liked. Who he couldn’t live without, you know? Said he was gonna go find them a place to live together.” Steve was hardly listening. Had Billy found someone new? Steve knew he wasn’t Billy’s only… boyfriend or hook-up… but it hadn’t been that long. Was it just Steve who felt like this? Had he read the whole thing wrong?

Steve put the phone down with any sort of farewell or thanks and slid down the wall. He was pining for someone who didn’t want him. Who did need him anymore. God he was an idiot. Every time someone had said he went in too hard or too strong was true.

Somehow he made it back to his room and onto his bed. Staring at the ceiling unseeing trying to figure out what he missed. Why he wasn’t the guy Billy was crazy about. Why he wasn’t the one Billy was moving in with. Was he already with hem when he rang Steve? Was it so cold because he was trying to tell Steve he had moved on and didn’t want him.

Another wave of blue crashed over him and he wished he could sink into his bed. To be swallowed up never to be seen again.

His doorbell rang sometime later, he considered not going but it wouldn’t be worth it if it was something for his dad. So, he hauled himself off and trudged down stairs. He sniffed, huffed and pulled himself up tall. He plastered a fake ass smile on his face and opened the door.

When he opened it up however, he didn’t see a stuffy suited man looking at him but blue. Endless ocean blue eyes ones he had missed so much.

“Billy?” he whispered as a smile danced across the others features.

“Pack a bag baby. I am taking you home.” His voice sounded sure confident and sexy, and it made Steve feel weak. The smile fell off his face as he rushed forward, “Steve? What’s going on? Are you okay?”

Steve was confused for a moment until Billy’s fingers brushed his cheek and came away damp. He chuckled in disbelief, “You’re here.” He murmured barely above a whisper. “But the guy you live with said you were going to get your boyfriend. And live with him.”

“Yeah, Steve. Why else would I be here? I have come to get you!”

Steve stared into his eyes losing himself in their colour, he reached out and reeled Billy in. He kissed him on his door step neighbors be damned then shot away to pack up his life, to start a new one where the only blue is the sea, the sky, and Billy.

Thanks for reading. Hope you liked it!

[confinedinthisflesh]

11x03 rewatch reactions by remmie

(dear god, i was more nervous going in and i didn't know why but my brain was psychic)

- i was gonna say shit about debbie but then she gave me a death glare and i said no

- i wish i had the constellation thing as a child, also love lip and tami

- 🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢

- y'all happy? are y'all? poor nick jonas 🤢

- you're both each other's bitch, shut the fuck up

- HA orange dick 🤢

- already hate this man or woman talk, just fucking shut up and love each other

- debbie is stressed! if franny wants to wear pants, let her wear pants! also guys please pay attention to debbie!

- oh i was confused when i first saw it, but they literally all ignored debbie

- ian running after mickey and carl hA

- liam i don't blame you for leaving franny with frank because no one cared when you were left with him, but oh my

- kev is stupid and that's it

- love that the fam groupchat is the five of them and none of their significant others

- power drills are sexy!

- i can't believe i never noticed that there were two franny's, but now that i do i once again do not care because they both are so fucking cute 🥰😭

- *sing song* i don't give a fUCk about carlllll

- HA BILLIE EILLISH- also lil xan

- haha termite what happened, no more trouble in paradise

- aye give amy the same love

- hoooo mickey in the alibi makes me cry a bit, there's mickey!

- mickey look at your arms you are literally already there!

- ahah s10 mickey with the word vomit

-kev didn't you have a keg stolen 6 seasons ago?

- "*weak voice* like Swole?"

- i hate this entire conversation with ian and his coworkers

- i tried not to laugh at the doctor's mask because YAY thank you make it easier to actually know what you're saying but god no nose is weird to see

- also poor brad and cami baby 😭

- sandy why are you being a bit shady????

- once again kev is an idiot and he kinda deserved it

- bro mickey you are already swole!

- FRED'S FACE AT THE BINKY!

- here goes the frank gallagher chase

- is it just me or does anyone get the vibe from frank that he's slowly losing it, i'll expand later

- good on you ian for standing up to your boss, but now you don't have a job 🙃

- MICKEY V KEV INTERACTIONS GIVE ME SEROTONIN! SEROTONIN!

- THERE'S MICKEY! (aside from the kev thing, kinda) (being able to crunch out a plan like that i missed it 🥺)

- "eat shit ian" HA

- my god please don't i hate this please stop ohmygod and there's the headbu-

- THANK YOU V!

- lip, stabbing the baby is not funny

- okay here's the frank slowly losing it again to me, once again expand later

- YES V! YES V! i am proposing sbajdjd!

- i love brad, that's it, that's the dash mark

- okay here's my expansion: this is solidifying my frank is gonna die prediction, he's reminiscing a lot and like leaving a lasting mark on franny with this lesson ya know, he's trying to fix his regrets, even if they're like slapping a band aid on it, not to mention look at how whm is saying the lines and looking, it's like a dying man's last days, kinda made me tear up too

- god liam i love you too

- debbie i don't support yelling at liam, but lip you didn't have to go off on her like that, also y'all completely ignored her

- lip are you okay? haven't seen you go off like that in a bit

- frank i hate you but ya know what i'll give you this one ⭐ take the star sticker

- first time watching this i had to run to my remote because all my household heard was THAT 🤢🤢😭😭

- poor nick jonas, poor my feed, i'm just gonna see the same gifs over and over 😭

anyway that's it, it was good, can't wait for hall of shame, and the yeah

i need to go bleach my eyes now

[13-reasons-ideas]

Hey🌸 your blog is my fave I love all the Monty love! Could u do #21 from Drabble Challenge: 1-150 “he’s a bad kisser” I kinda had this idea where she’s excited and getting ready for a date with this guy from school that’s she’s had a crush on, turns out he’s not as great as she thought and calls Monty (her best friend) and vents to him about everything & he’s secretly happy cause he’s always liked her ... let’s just say he shows her what a good kiss feels like😉

A/N: I am so sorry this took so long. I had a hard time figuring out the date, because its been... at least 5 years since I went on an actual first date. I hope you like this. I combined a couple of asks because they asked for basically the same thing. I also suck at titles. I hope you like it! 

Bad Date? 

t finally happened. Dillion finally asked me out. Tonight was the night of our first date. I cannot tell you how long I’ve had a crush on him, probably since the seventh grade at least. The first and only person I wanted to tell about my excitement was nowhere to be found. I checked my watch quickly and saw that it was 3:25. Monty would be heading into the locker room to change for baseball practice. If I run there, I could probably catch him. As I looked up from my watch, I caught sight of everyone’s favourite jock. “Jeff. Hey Atkins!” I called out to him. He turned around and saw me.

“Hey flapjack, what’s up?” He asked, using the nickname the boys had given me back in fourth grade, when I snuck them all in on a Saturday morning and made pancakes while we watched cartoons.

“Have you seen Monty?” I asked, trying to contain my excitement.

“No, but I can grab him from the locker room for you if you need. Is everything okay?” He asked, mild concern etching his face.

“Yeah. No everything’s great. Would you mind? I’d go in myself but… I don’t need to see that.” I was trying not to bounce at this point. He nodded and motioned for me to follow him. As I waited for him to send Monty out, I heard the boys yelling and generally being idiots.

“Hey de la Cruz, your girl needs to talk to you. I’d hurry before she gives herself an aneurysm or something. She seems pretty eager about whatever it is.” Jeff called through the room. I heard the guys give Monty a playful hard time about it, but they knew that there was nothing romantic between us. Monty popped out of the room and I couldn’t help the brief look to his chiseled abdomen. I said nothing romantic, not that I didn’t appreciate that my best friend is hot.

“What’s up Hailey? Jeff seemed concerned. Are you okay?” He rattled off quickly.

“I’m good Monty. Actually, I’m better than good. I’m great. You’ll never guess what happened?” I sang, beginning to bounce on my heels. He watched me with an amused expression.

“Your parents bought you a new used Civic?” He asked, jokingly. I made a face and rolled my eyes.

“No you goof. Dillion asked me out.” I exclaimed excitedly. He smiled and laughed at my overly excited demeanor.

“That’s great. Need me to come over after practice? It’ll probably get cut short because of the rain.” He offered.

“Sure. He’s not picking me up until 7 so you’ll have time.” He nodded and before he could say anything, Bryce stuck his head out the door.

“Hate to break up the love fest or whatever this is, but we have to go practice Monty.”

“I’m coming. Just a second. I’ll text you when we are done and head over.” Monty said before leaning down and giving me a tight hug.

Monty was right. Practice ended at 4:15, a mere forty-five minutes after it began, so he was currently watching me pull out every item of clothing in my closet. “This one?” I asked, holding up a red sweater. He thought for a moment before shaking his head.  I shook my head and groaned, “I have nothing to wear.” I sank down on the bed beside him and covered my face “I should just cancel. You’ve said no to everything and I can’t very well go naked, can I?”

He chuckled and muttered “I mean, you could. I don’t think Dillion will complain.” I gasped scandalously, grabbed my pillow, and whacked him playfully with it. “Hey! Violence!”

“Oh please. You’re going to tell me about how violence is bad? Coach said if you screw up your full ride hand in another fight, he will skin you.”

Monty laughed heartily and tapped my knee a few times, “okay fine. Come on, get up. We need to find you some clothes to wear Missy.” I groaned again and went back to my closet. “What about that shirt with the flowers and girly shit on it? That’s cute.” I considered it for a moment before shrugging the suggested top on. I turned around and showed him and he gave me a quick thumbs up. Knowing that he isn’t exactly the most fashion forward person known to man-he wears a different variation of the same shirt everyday- I grabbed a pair of 501’s and pulled them on.

As I tackled my hair and makeup, Monty and I caught up for a while. We had both been busy with school and our own activities, so this was the most uninterrupted time we had alone together recently. “So, any big plans for the evening?” I asked casually.

“Not really. Dad is out of town visiting family or whatever, so I’ll probably just have a chill night at home with my mom. She’s trying some new chicken thing tonight, so hopefully I don’t get sick. Remember the slow cooker ‘pork’?”

“You mean the pulled mush? Of course I remember. I still can’t eat pork chops.”

Monty barked out a laugh and shuddered. The sound of a car pulling in the driveway pulled us from our revere. “Oh crap. He’s here. Montgomery, what do I do?”

“Relax. It’ll be fine. Grab a jacket and I’ll go with you to answer the door.”

I took a deep breath and went with Monty to answer the door. He stood next to me, suspiciously close behind me. Dillion knocked a few raps before I opened it. He looked me up and down, taking me in, and smiled smoothly, “Hey Hailey. You look very pretty tonight.” He looked to Monty and his smile faltered for a brief second, “de la Cruz.”

“Sanders.” Monty replied, more coolly than I expected him to.

Finally finding my voice after taking in his blue Billy Reid Henley and tailored jeans, I replied shakily. “Hey Dillion. Thanks, you look good too. You ready?” Thanks? Really? Get it together.

“I’m ready if you are.” He replied, helping me into my coat.

I blushed slightly but caught Monty roll his eyes. What crawled up his ass? Turning to him I addressed Monty and gave him a quick hug, “Feel free to stay as long as you want. Just make sure you set the alarm before you go. I’ll call you tonight.”

In the shiny black BMW on the way to Rosie’s, Dillion was a perfect gentleman. He let me pick the music and we chatted casually, more of his attention understandably on the road than on me. That would be a hell of a first date. When we arrived, he opened my door and helped me out of the car. He even gave me his arm as we walked in. This is great.

When we were seated, things started to change. In the car, his divided attention could be explained away with driving. When sitting across from each other at dinner on the other hand, it was a little harder to explain. He was polite to the waitress at the door at least. When we sat down there was a period of awkward silence. The people around us chatted freely while we just sat. Dillion plucked a piece of thread from his sleeve and I inspected the hem of my top. Finally, the waitress arrived. “Good evening, my name’s Riley, what can I get for you?”

“A chocolate-“

“A cherry-“ we started together.

“Sorry. You first.” Dillion acquiesced with a wave of his hand, as though he was doing me a favour. I smiled at him before ordering.

“May I get a cherry chocolate shake please?”

“Sure thing. Yourself?” Riley replied, marking my order on her well used notepad.

“May I get a chocolate shake please Riley?” Dillion asked, giving her a flirty smirk. Seriously? I’m sitting right here. I pretended not to notice and after another moment or two we were able to start a conversation of sorts.

“So Hailey, you’re quite a hard girl to track down. It took me weeks to track you down in our little town to ask you out.” Dillion started suavely.

I blushed before deciding to play coy, “I’m a busy girl Dillion, lots going on, you know?”

“Yeah, I noticed.” He chuckled. “Most of my issue was getting you away from your friends, so I could ask you privately.”

“Well, you could of asked to talk privately. They wouldn’t have minded.” I was growing confused and concerned with his comments.

“Your bodyguard would have been okay with it?” He asked before muttering under his breath, “sure.”

I was taken aback by his comment about Monty but after considering it for a moment, let it slide. If it were me in his place, I probably would be scared shitless too. Before I could think of a response, Riley arrived with our milkshakes. “Here you go guys. What can I getcha?” I motioned to Dillion to order first.

“I’ll get a bacon cheeseburger.”

“And I’ll have a club sandwich with a soup please.”

“Comin’ right up.”

After she left to put our orders in, in an attempt to salvage the conversation, I decided to ask Dillion about himself. “Tell me about yourself? We’ve never really talked about non-school related things.”

He immediately perked up and grinned, “well, where do I start? Oh, I know. My hobbies consist of being awesome and being a badass. To preface, my friends and I are idiots when we get together.” I felt my eyes widen slightly before smoothing my face. “This one night, Marshall, a few of our buddies, and I ‘borrowed’ his dad’s truck and took it for a spin in Mr. Johnston’s field.”

“Oh, coo-” I started.

“He has no cameras. Probably not the smartest idea on his part. Anyway, Jacob-he goes to Hillcrest, private school boy- cracked a beer in the box as Marshall had the brilliant idea to floor it. Beer went everywhere. All over Jacob, the back window, the box, and the field. I opened my beer before getting in the truck.”

“Ah, of course.” I nodded along, trying to fain interest.

“A few beers in, we decided to switch drivers. I took charge and did a few doughnuts, no big deal. By the end of the night the field was messed up. Would show you pictures, but we weren’t dumb enough to take them. Not illegal if you don’t get caught, am I right?”

“I-I guess?”

“I’m right. But enough about me, how was the bio test last week?”

“It was okay, some of the questions were dumb. The vitamin K question gave me some trouble.”

“Oh yeah, totally. I barely got a C- on it. How’d you do?” he bragged, as though it was an accomplishment. Fuck this guy is annoying.

I blinked before answering dryly, “I got an A- that had to be adjusted to an A because the scantron machine screwed up.” Dillion blinked at me clearly at a loss for words and thankfully, Riley came with our food. Bless her and her timing.

We ate our food quietly, or at least, more quietly than before. Dillion was still regaling me with stories of his shenanigans and ‘not illegal because we didn’t get caught’ antics with his friends. I was counting down the bites until I would be done my sandwich and we could leave. After we had finished and gotten the bill, he pulled out his wallet before I had time to even think about grabbing my purse. Huh. He’s paying without discussion. Maybe he’s trying to make up for talking my ear off. He offered me his hand to help me up and, after helping me into my jacket again, held it as we walked back to the car. Maybe he’s just awkward on dates. Maybe I’m judging him too harshly.

The ride back to my place was quiet, thankfully. I tried to keep a smile on my face, even though I wanted to do nothing more than make my feelings known. Just have to get to the house. Then I can be done with this. Drama class is coming in really handy now. As we pulled up to my house and parked, Dillion cut the engine and undid his seatbelt. I plastered a big smile on my face and once again, tried to give him the benefit of the doubt. At least he’s walking me to the door. That’s a plus, right? He came around and opened my door for me, pulling me from my thoughts. Taking my hand, he led me to the door and we stood on the step for a moment looking into each other’s eyes. He is very pretty. “I had a really great time tonight Hailey.” Dillion said. He brushed a strand of hair that fell back behind my ear. “And I know I said it already, but you look beautiful tonight.”

My eyes softened as I again, thought of how sweet and charming he could be. My smile became less forced and I relaxed. I didn’t want to lie to him, so I just nodded, playing it off as being shy. Under the soft light of my front porch and the spotlight of the full moon, he leaned in slightly. I let out a quiet breath when his hand fell naturally on my hip, to pull me closer. This is it. He’s going to kiss me. He closed his eyes and I closed mine. My hands rested comfortably on his shoulders and I felt his lips touch mine and it felt… wet. Not ‘used a gel lip balm wet’. Not ‘just had a drink and there’s liquid left on my lips’ wet. It was saliva. Oh. My. God. He pulled me closer still and I could swear I felt… god no. teeth. This is terrible. Trying not to pull away too quickly, I managed to smoothly detach myself from him. I cleared my throat and tried to make it look like I was catching my breath. “W-wow.” I stuttered. I stepped away and tried to keep my expression relaxed. I turned and backed against the door, reaching for the handle. Dillion smiled at me again before checking his watch.

“It’s getting late, I should probably head home. I had fun tonight.”

“Uh, yeah. Me too. Drive safe. See you at school.” I said, blinking a few times to confirm I was in fact, awake and this wasn’t some alternate universe or nightmare.

I turned to unlock the door and he was driving away before I was even had my key in the lock. Leaning back against the door I tried to catch my breath and digest what a disaster tonight had turned into. I grabbed a blanket and curled up on the couch to call Montgomery. He picked up on the second ring. “Hey Hales. How’d it go?”

“Uuuuuggggghhhhhh.” I groaned in response.

“That bad? What happened?” his voice took on a concerned tone.

“Where do I begin? Let’s see. The drive over was nice. But when we got to the restaurant everything changed. He was polite to the waitress which is good. But he just… talked the whole time. About himself. I barely got a word in edgewise. And he was so arrogant.”

“Ouch, that bites. I’m sorry Hailey.”

“That’s not even the worst part. There’s more. So, he was an arrogant prick at dinner and I think I said a total of twenty words the whole time. When we got back to my place, he walked me to the door.”

“As he should have.” Monty interjected.

“I mean yes. It was what happened after we got to the door that’s the problem.”

“I’m listening.”

“He kissed me.” I groaned.

“Did you want him to kiss you?” His voice had an edge to it I didn’t like.

“Yeah I guess? I really didn’t think that it could be that bad. It’s not like he kissed me when I told him no or anything, so chill.”

“Oh. Well that’s good. How bad could it have been Hales?”

“He’s a bad kisser.”

“Define bad exactly?”

“It was wet Monty. To be more specific it felt wet, sloppy, and when he pulled me closer, toothy. And it’s not like he has an overbite and can’t help the teeth, at least then you can’t really blame the guy.” I heard Monty stifle a laugh on the other end of the line. “Go ahead, you can laugh.” He burst out laughing and I couldn’t help but laugh along.

“I-I’m so-sorry. I shouldn’t-” he choked out between laughs. Pausing to catch his breath he continued, “I shouldn’t laugh. That’s really not good.”

“Not good? Monty its bad. Worse than just bad. It’s very bad.”

Monty sighed after another moment. “I’m sorry you had such a shit date. Your mom still in Vermont?”

“Yeah, she’ll be back Saturday. Why?”

“I tell you what. I’ll come over and try to make up for the horrible evening you had to endure. I’m free the rest of the night so I can stay over. You, me, popcorn, two-liter Dr. Pepper, and a movie. You in?”

“Throw in Mike & Ikes and Hot Tamales and you’ve got yourself a deal. I’ll make the popcorn this time though. I for one don’t like snacking on charcoal.”

Monty chuckled, “It was ONE time. You drive a hard bargain but sure. You’re still not a fuckin’ child though.”

“Yeah yeah, you love me. I’ll see you in a bit.”

“You know it.” He said and I could hear the smile in his voice before he hung up.

I knew he would have to stop at Blue Spot for the Dr. Pepper at this time of night so I could hold off on the popcorn for now. I decided to get out of the uncomfortable clothes I wore on my date and put on something more homely. I quickly changed into one of Monty’s old gym shirts I stole from his drawer and a pair of bike shorts. The shirt was so big on me it hit me mid-thigh. I took off my makeup and brushed my hair out before heading down to put the popcorn on the stove and pick out a movie.

I was just taking the popcorn off the burner when Monty knocked on the door. “One second!” I called. I ran to open the door and Monty stood with his arms full. He looked alluring in the moonlight. The light pulling the flecks of gold in his hazel eyes out. I welcomed him inside and he placed our various snacks and drinks on the coffee table while I grabbed the popcorn. When I reached for the bowl, his shirt rode up and I felt his eyes on my ass. Oh boys. “Enjoying the view?” I flirted playfully. He coughed, caught off guard by my comment and tried to recover.

“Nah, I’m admiring my shirt. I wondered where it disappeared to. Looks good on you though.” he flirted back.

“Uh-huh. Here, come get the butter and cups. I’ve got the popcorn.” I sauntered back to the couch and pulled the blanket over my legs. Monty took his usual spot beside me and I cuddled close to him as I got comfortable. Holding the popcorn in my lap, I grabbed the remote and hit play on Christopher Robin. We settled in for a quiet evening.

By the time we got halfway through the movie, the pop had been half finished, the candy was more on the floor and couch than in our mouths, and the popcorn had been long forgotten. I had spent most of the movie thinking about the failure of the date I had and watching Monty’s facial expressions at the film, even though we had seen it many times before. I thought about feelings I had either ignored or pushed away and about comments the two of us had shared that could be construed as something more than simply two friends joking around. I sat up suddenly, startling Monty slightly.

“Hey Monty?” I asked shyly.

“Yeah Hailey?” he asked, still mostly focused on the movie.

“Do… is… what’s happening here?”

“Uh… we are watching a movie?” His attention turning to me.

“No. Well, technically yes. But that’s not what I mean.”

“I’m not following.”

I sighed, grabbed the remote and pressed pause, and continued even though every fibre of my being was telling me not to, that I had to be reading everything wrong. “It’s just, when I told you about Dillion at school you seemed really detached. And you said no to literally every option when I was asking about clothes. It wasn’t until I looked upset about cancelling that you made a suggestion. And then when he picked me up, you were really quiet and cold towards him. And I get that the date was a literal burning shit pile, but you seemed almost… glad that it went badly. Like you were happy we wouldn’t be going on another date.”

“I… uh.” He was at a loss for words.

“I’ve heard Scott and Jeff talk. I’ve heard the other guys comment on stuff we say to each other. I just...” I was being to lose my nerve. “Actually you know what? Just... just forget it. Forget I said anything. I’m going to go get a glass of water.” I stood up and started to walk to the kitchen. I could hear Monty stand up and walk towards me but I refused to turn around. I felt his hand grab my arm gently and turn me around.

“Hailey.”

“Hmm?” I still couldn’t look at him.

“You’re right.”

“I’m right? About what?”

“I was happy your date went bad. Not that you were upset or that you didn’t enjoy yourself. I was happy that there wouldn’t be a second date. That I wouldn’t have to...”

“Have to what? Share me?” I turned to look at him now. “I wouldn’t stop being your friend if I had a boyfriend Monty.”

“Well I would hope not. Who else would keep me in check Hales? Scotty could try but it’s not like he could hold me back. And he doesn’t seem like type to hug another dude unless someone died or some shit. And Bryce, well who knows what he’d do.” He paused to take a breath, as though he was gathering some of that tiger courage the boys always talk about. “But that’s not the point. I don’t want to have to watch you be with someone else. Someone who isn’t....”

“Isn’t what Montgomery?” I asked, not daring to breathe too much. This couldn’t be real. I have to have fallen asleep. He looked at me and all the things I had ignored or pushed away came to the forefront of my mind. The way the dim kitchen light illuminated his face and caught the freckles faintly scattered across his face, made him look almost angelic. He’s going to kiss me.

“Someone that isn’t me.” He said before he pulled me in, placed his hand on my hip, leaned in, and kissed me in one quick smooth motion. For the second time that night, my hands found themselves resting against firm shoulders, more confidently this time. This time though, it wasn’t wet, or sloppy, and there were no teeth. When he pulled me closer, he ran his tongue along my bottom lip, asking permission for entrance. When I granted it, he wrapped his strong arms around my waist and lifted me onto the counter so I could wrap my arms around his neck more easily. When we pulled away, I smiled and then I had a thought. “So…”

“Yes?”

“Does this mean I get to keep the shirt?” I asked cheekily.

Monty laughed wholeheartedly. “Yeah, yeah I guess it does. I was serious, it looks better on you than me.” He helped me down and we walked back to the couch holding hands.

[theamberwriter]

Judgement Day [Billy Hargrove]

[ PART ONE ]

Paring: Billy Hargrove x Reader

Word Count: 5,483

Warnings: Cursing, smoking

Author Note: So this ends up in an AU, anyone who has watched season 3 should know what I’m talking about. Also ended up with slight Soft!Billy, lol Eyes burned into you, glaring you down as you walked through the mall. Voices whispered in hushed tones. Jealous, seething green-eyed vipers ready to strike. They stared, snootily flipping their hair over their shoulder. They heard it - you were the one to lock down the new reigning king of Hawkins, Billy Hargrove. And they hated you for it.

Lifelong friends glared you down as new enemies. Those you loved shunned you. Everyone around you tuned you out. Ghosted you. You no longer existed in their eyes. You pleaded with your parents. You begged your friends. But no one listened.

"You're an idiot," Steve remarked. He dug in and scooped something out of the freezer. "You want a doofus sundae?"

Robin's head rose out of the freezer in a green glow, eyes white. A semi-circle missing from her brain where her skull was gone and he'd scooped her. She was grinning wickedly.

"You're such a moron," she cackled. "I never liked you anyway."

"[Name], friends don't lie," El said, walking in. Just as ghostly, eyes just as blank. "You lied, [Name]."

"You lied," said Max. Then Mike. Then Lucas. Then Dustin. Then Will. All blank. All glowing. All ghostly and wrong.

you lied

You Lied

You LIED

YOU LIED

YOU LIED

YOU LIED

The chant became louder and louder until it was deafening. You screamed, covering your ears. 

You jolted up out of bed, screaming there too. But only peaceful darkness greeted you. No chants to be heard, just crickets chirping outside the open window. You were soaked from head to toe in sweat. You could barely catch your breath. A hand found its way to your arm.

"Another nightmare?" Billy groaned into the pillow beside yours. You'd snuck him in after your parents went to bed. 

Easing down beside him, you sighed, "Yeah."

"C'mere." You could barely hear him, but he grabbed you and tucked you up next to him. Pressing close to you. You soon heard him lightly snoring. Good to know one of you was getting sleep that night.

Billy crept out of your room when the sun peeked through your window. Like he always did. You were still asleep. He kissed you gently, muttering out, "Sleep well. It'll all be over soon. No more nightmares."

Then he drove swiftly into the dawn. Creeping back through his own window. Dreading this day in his own right. Today was the today that you both had decided to tell all of Hawkins the news. Or at least those in Hawkins that mattered to you. But they would spread it like wildfire.

It'd been about a month since the fateful movie night. Billy had learned to deal with the kids being around all the time. Especially since you'd chewed out a few times for being such a jerk to them. His relationship with Steve was still non-existent. But they coexisted peacefully for you. Even if somewhat awkwardly.

Robin had also become your new best friend. You hung out when you needed a break from the boyfriend drama. She didn't see anything wrong with you dating Billy. But was genuinely surprised that you hadn't gone for Steve. Given his protectiveness over you. But Steve was just a friend. He had been for a long time, and you didn't want to change that.

You had your stent with your crush on him. But that flame was long extinguished now. You supported him through his relationship with Nancy. Nursing him after with lots of corny movies and ice cream. Honestly, Steve was like a single mother. 

Once Billy was back in his own bed with your body heat gone. Your existence missing beside his, he couldn't sleep again. He stared at the ceiling, his stomach heavy. There were very few things in his life that held this kind of weight. 

At first, when he'd teased you about the book - it was only to get in your pants. But when you finally called him, he'd had a rough night. And you, who had no reason at all to deal with him, sat on the phone for hours while his stupidly drunken self blubbered away. Your words cradled him. Quieting him into sleep and sanctuary. When he was sober again, he thought it was a dream until you called to check on him.

Honestly, he'd hated the emotions that one small gesture gave him. At least for the first month or two. But you started calling more, or you'd sit quietly next to him and read during school, or you asked how his day had been when you walked passed him on the way to your car, or you'd do some other small gesture. Things he realized you had no reason to. But he found comfort in them, so you did them. 

He couldn't really remember what he'd told you the night you called, but he was happy that his drunk self had done something right. There were days he was scared it was all a dream. Some sweet hallucination caused by some drug he'd done, and it'd be whisked away with the high. But every day, for the ten months since you called him that first time, you were there. But so was Steve.

Billy was admittedly jealous at first. Worried you were cheating with how much time you spent around Steve. But you quieted him, reassuring over and over that Steve was a friend. And that he and Nancy had recently broken up. He wasn't ready for anyone else yet. And you didn’t want anyone else beside Billy, anyway. Billy wasn't satisfied until he spent a day spying on you guys in the mall and around town. He wondered if you'd secretly known he had.

Billy would take asking you out properly for the first time all over again over this. He needed only your approval the first time. This time, while he didn't need anyone's approval, he knew there were going to be issues. 

You'd been having nightmares for about two weeks. You even joked about going to California to avoid telling anyone. Billy did want to take you, to show you where he grew up and all of his favourite places and the beach and the water. Maybe teach you how to surf. But you both had to do this first. As tempting as it was to get in his car and drive away with you. He knew he couldn't.

You didn't want to get up when the morning birds called outside of your window. Blasted rens had built a nest in the tree just outside your room. And there was no sleeping once they began singing. But you didn't want to face the day. You had a twisting, burning, nauseous feeling in your stomach. 

You knew you had to, and wanted to, break the news to everyone. But were you ready to? Not in the least. Your parents would probably disown you. And all of your friends would give you the cold shoulder. This was going to be a nightmare. At least it couldn't be worse than your actual nightmares. Right?

It was Saturday, so your parents were at home. So were your siblings. You got ready quickly, knowing your parents already would be. They had a thing about being ready before breakfast. It was weird. You didn't want to go down when you heard cartoons come on the TV. But it was now or never.

You crept nervously down into the kitchen. Your mom was humming, mixing up something in a bowl. And your dad had the paper in his hand, a steaming cup of coffee in front of him. You could see the heads of your siblings peeking over the back of the couch in the living room.

You stood awkwardly in the doorway. Heart pounding, you felt like you were going to pass out. But Billy was going to be at your house soon. So you had to say something. You cleared your throat.

"Good morning, sweetie," your mom said, spooning some batter into a pan.

"Someone's ready early, you going somewhere?" your dad asked peeking over the paper.

"I, uh," you stuttered softly. You nearly couldn’t choke it out. "I actually invited someone over for breakfast."

Your mom sighed. "It would've been nice of you to tell us. I'll have to make more."

"And who've you invited? Is it Steve?" Your dad didn't even move the paper. "I always liked him. He's a nice kid. Haven’t seen him around in a while. You two still friends?"

You went rigid. Your mind stumbling through a few lines. What did you tell them? Should you say it’s Billy? Or your boyfriend or? But out came, "Yeah we are. I just invited a different friend from high school."

That was such a big lie.

"That's nice, do we know them?" Your mom's eyes felt like they pierced you. Oh no.

"Maybe." You tried not to fidget. But your nerves were getting the best of you. Your mom could always tell you were lying when you did that.

You raced to the door when there was a knock. Shit, shit, shit, shit, was all you could think. Behind the door was Billy. His shirt buttoned, his cologne less overpowering than usual, and he didn't smell like he'd had a cigarette yet. His face mirrored your panic.

"Did you tell them?" he asked quietly.

You groaned. "No, not yet, I couldn't get it out! I just said I was having a friend over!"

Billy's eyes widened some. You had never seen him like this. His cool act had completely fizzled out. "Should I leave until you tell them I'm a little more than a friend?"

You grabbed his hand. "No, no - we can tell them together and we run for it if they get mad."

Billy kissed your knuckles. "Yeah, okay. Let's get this over with."

You gripped each other's hand tightly. Your heart racing, aching against your ribcage. This wasn't going to end well. You knew it already. You were already counting the steps to the front door.

"Uuhhh," was all you could get out as you stood in the kitchen passthrough. There was a clatter as your mom dropped her spatula. Her eyes shot between your intertwined hands, Billy, and your father. She gave you an are you serious?? look. You smiled warily and shrugged.

"[Name] aren't you going to -" your father started, tipping down the paper. He stopped when he saw Billy close behind you. He stood. "What is he doing here? What have I told you about the Hargroves? They're trouble!"

"Dad, listen -" you begged.

Your father slammed a hand on the table, sending coffee sloshing all over. "No - you listen to me, he is not welcome here -"

"We're dating," you yelled. Your parents went very still. "For nearly a year now, and I - Billy, let's go."

"It was very nice you meet you!" Billy called as you pushed him down the hall. 

 A fork and plate were thrown out of the kitchen doorway as you looked over your shoulder. Your father yelling, "I don't want either of you back here!"

"Now, dear…" you heard your mother mutter calmly as you shoved Billy out the front door.

"Charming folks," Billy noted as you both got in his car.

"Hurry up and drive," you rushed, watching the door. Your dad came storming out, yelling words you couldn't hear as you and Billy sped off. "I'm so sorry. I thought he'd take it better -"

"It's fine," Billy assured, reaching over to take one of your hands. But his face didn't read reassurance. Or any of the emotions that would've made you feel better. 

You groaned, sinking down in the seat. "It's going to be a disaster today, isn't it?"

Billy's thumb rubbed circles on the back of your hand. "Neil and Susan won’t be much easier to tell. But Max said she was going to stick around until we came over. We can go blow off some steam in the mall after if you want to. We can go see...Steve."

You chuckled some at the way Billy said his name. Like it was physically painful. You could see the displeasure in his eyes. But maybe a chat with Steve and Robin was what you needed. "Yeah, that'd be nice. Thank you."

The rest of the ride to Billy's was quiet. Just gripping each other's hand in a vice. He smoked two whole cigarettes. You knew this was stressful for him. But you were thankful to Max for sticking around. Finally, you rolled into the drive.

"You ready?" you asked softly. Billy was staring straight at the house. His face creased in worry. "Hey, hey - look at me."

Hesitantly, Billy turned to you. You placed a hand on his cheek. Putting your forehead to his, he closed his eyes and you felt breathing calm. But he didn’t relax any.

"It'll be fine," you cooed, "I will be fine. I promise."

You flinched when there was a knock on your window. You turned to find Max, who had a smile. You rolled down the window.

"[Name]!" she said, "I was wondering when guys were coming. I've been stalling. But Neil seems to be in a good mood. - C'mon. He's been talking about taking my mom somewhere."

"Let's go," you uttered, giving Billy's hand a squeeze. Then you both got out of the car. 

Max lead you up to the door, going in first. Billy followed, then you. You were pretty sure you'd never actually seen the rest of the Hargrove house. It was smaller than you'd thought. A large weight set, that must've belonged to Billy, tucked in the corner. A small smile touched your lips.

"Where the hell have you been?" the man you assumed was Neil snapped as his eyes landed on Billy. You took a step closer, your free hand pulling Billy's arm to your chest. Your own form of protection and comfort over him. It seemed to give him a boost.

"I was at breakfast," Billy said, his voice was strained. "This is [Name], we've been dating under the table for a while. I thought you'd like to them."

Neil glanced between you two before his whole demeanor changed. He put on a friendly front. Introducing himself as he reached to shake your hand. "Nice to meet you. Didn't know my son could hold down anyone."

You laughed awkwardly. You hated this man, you’d cleaned up Billy’s wounds one too many times. Max came in then, a tall red-haired woman in tow. You could see the resemblance. This must've been Susan.

"Mom, this is [Name]," Max said, "them and Billy have been dating for a few months. They're really cool."

The tense energy in the room was totally different than how you'd thought it'd be. It was worse. You could nearly cut it with a knife. But Susan still smiled, shaking your hand. "It's nice to meet you. How long have you two been together?"

You and Billy glanced at each other. You smiled at him, nodding. Then you said, "We've been together about eight or nine months…We wanted to make sure we'd work out before, you know, announcing it to everyone. Cause that'd be awkward…"

That was total waffle, but Susan seemed to buy it. Billy gave you a look that read, what the fuck was that excuse? You shrugged. You panicked, it was all you could think of. Couldn't tell an abusive father that his son was scared he'd knock you around too!

"Anyway, we better go," Billy said, "We have a whole day planned."

You nodded, forcing a smile. "Yeah, it was so nice to finally meet you. Neil, Susan - I'll see you around Max."

"Bye guys!" Max called cautiously as you and Billy slipped out the door.

"That was…" you trailed off, sinking back into the leather.

"Tense," Billy finished, turning on the car. He backed out and headed for the mall. "I might almost be glad to see Harrington after that."

You chuckled, but you could see how dealing with Steve would be easier for him. That house was...well, you could see how Billy turned out the way he did. You could see why he was such a jerk, and why Max was how she was. It was super unhealthy.

Billy relaxed when you got to the mall. The hustle and bustle would make him forget about Neil's uncertain reaction for a little while. He just wanted to stroll around with you, hand in hand, finally showing off his significant other. That's all he'd wanted, to proudly parade you around. Despite what you feared. Let them hate you, he thought, who cared? You two were happy.

You pulled Billy to a group of your friends once you got in the mall. There were four of them. You’d met them your freshman year. The one you were closest to was tall and blonde. A total cheerleader in high school, even now after you graduated. She'd had a thing for Billy for a while. It was so awkward that last semester to hear her gush about him. And what she’d like to do to him. You and Billy had decided by then to keep everything a total secret.

"Hey guys," you greeted. The four of them looked at you. Then Billy. Then your intertwined hands.

"Was is this?" the blonde asked, standing. Oh if looks could kill. Her were eyes sharp, her lips wrenched down into a pout.

"Billy and I are dating," you said warily. "I thought you'd like to kn -"

"Consider yourself blacklisted, [L/Name]," she stated, the other three stood as well. Each looking just as displeased as the next. They were like an unofficial Billy fangroup.

"What?" you breathed, Billy yanked you back. He wrapped himself around you protectively. You looked up to see the warning in his face. "Why? I thought we were friends!"

"I was friends with you because you were friends with Steve. And I stayed friends with you because you became close to Billy. But this is crossing the line. - You should've gone to college. You should've left Hawkins like you were planning before you met him." The blonde flipped her hair, just like in your dream. You watched as the group walked away without a second look.

"That could've gone better," you groaned. Honestly, what she said explained a lot. She always did ask if either of the two were going to be at whatever you invited her to. "Let's go see St -"

"You were gonna go to college?" Billy asked, his voice held a strange mixture of emotions. "You were gonna go, but you stayed here? Why? Is it cause of me?"

Oh dear, this was not what you wanted. "No, I applied before we even started hanging out and -"

"How many colleges?" He was hurt, you could see it in his eyes behind the fury.

You turned away from him. "That's not important -"

"How many colleges did you get into?" Billy said sharply, pulling you back to him.

You swallowed thickly, then looked back at him. "Ten. But it's really no big deal!"

Billy's face contorted into a strange expression you'd never seen him make before. He let you go, backing away to pace in a small circle. "Not a big deal? You could've left, but you stayed. - I never should have borrow that stupid book."

"No, Billy -" you pleaded, reaching for him. He backed away from your touch.

"You were better off without me. I knew it, but - college." Billy ran a hand through his hair. He how concerned your family was about you going. “I should’ve - you should’ve - just hung up when you called. Waited until I was sober to talk...you wouldn’t be in this mess...”

You caught his arm. "I decided to take a gap year when we started dating. I was going to tell you soon -" 

"Tell me what?" Billy snapped loudly, throwing his hands to the side. "That you're leaving?"

"That we are leaving, Billy!" you exclaimed, a little too loudly. He seemed taken aback. "I applied to schools in California. And I got into a few. I wanted to surprise you. I wanted to take you back."

Billy's heart was pounding. "Why? Why even bother?"

"Because that first night when I called. I was going to hang up. But then - you started to cry. About your mom, about how much you missed California, and all the terrible things your dad had done to you. And about how much you wanted Max to forgive you. About how no one would listen or take you seriously." You put a hand to his cheek. "I couldn’t leave you like that. I wanted to help. So I gave you what you needed, and I haven’t regretted that decision. I want to take you back. So you don't have to miss it anymore. So you and I can just - get away from here."

"Don't lie to me," Billy's voice shook, a wary edge to it.

You shook your head, "I'm not. I can show you the acceptance letters if you want."

"But your family? Harrington?" Billy was softer now, his brows scrunched in slight confusion.

"I can come back and visit. I want to be with you, and I want you to be happy. Hawkins doesn't make you happy, Billy," you stated. "I do, but Hawkins doesn't and I know that. So I want to run away with you."

Billy grinned, though he tried to hide it. He looked down at his shoes, which you noticed were his nice ones. You could still tell he was smiling like a little kid. He didn’t do that too often, much less with this many people around. He pulled you to him, hugging you tightly.

“Does Harrington know?” Billy asked in your ear.

You nodded. “I promised him no more secrets. I told him last week when I got the final letter.”

You pulled away to look at him. There was a spark in Billy’s eyes you hadn’t seen before. Happiness and mischief, a childish heart. He kissed you hard.

“I have all of the acceptance letters in my room, we can sneak in and get them. Then we can decide where to go from there. How’s that?” You played mindlessly with the front of his shirt. Not at all used to being like this is in public.

Billy kissed your forehead, sending a wave of warm tingles through your chest and stomach. “Perfect.” 

“Now can we please go to Scoops Ahoy before anyone else decides to tell me they used me?” you asked. Billy grabbed your hand and you headed towards the ice cream parlor. You relayed nearly everything you could bring yourself to tell Billy about your friends and their crushes on him.

“She actually said that?” Billy chuckled, taking a scoop of the sundae you were splitting. “I didn’t really think her the type.”

“That’s what happens when people spew about their crush to people who are close to them. Very rated R stuff tends to come out.” You rolled your eyes, taking a spoonful.

Billy smirked, leaning in. “And what kind of stuff comes out of you -” 

“And you didn’t even tell her you guys were dating?” Steve interrupted loudly, “those are some guts.”

“She would’ve spread it to everyone, so yes, I kept my mouth shut.” You paused thoughtfully. “I was honestly a little jealous. She did seem more his type than me.”

“I’d never leave you,” Billy muttered affectionately.

There was silence for a moment. Just the hum of the mall. You heard a few people laugh remarks as they passed the shop. Your stomach sank, but you knew it was just something you were going to have to get used to. 

“How many people do you think know by now?” Steve asked, staring out the entrance.

You shrugged. “It’s hard to tell. Our entire graduating class could know by now. Or they could have not said anything at all.”

“Well, if nothing else - you’ll always have us.” Steve gestured to the whole four of you in the creamery. 

“Yeah, I will,” you laughed. 

“What’re you gonna do when you go to California?” Robin asked you’d told her too.

You shrugged. “It depends on where we decide to go. But getting a job and an apartment is on top of the list, of course. But after that - it depends. If I can get my dad to talk to me, I want to come back for holidays, if you’re alright with that, Billy.” He nodded solemnly.

“Didn’t take it well?” Steve guessed, leaning on the counter.

You shook your head. “Said he didn’t want us back in the house. I don’t know what I’m going to do. Neil didn’t seem...exactly thrilled this morning, either.”

“I’ll deal with him,” Billy scoffed, waving it off.

“Billy…” You reached across the table and took his hand. “This is why I want to take you back to California. Get you away from him.”

Billy avoided your eyes, muttering out, “yeah.”

When you finished up your sundae, you waved goodbye to Steve and Robin. Then you and Billy wandered the mall. A few people you’d known in school caught your eye, and then swiftly gave you the cold shoulder. Billy got a few good on you mans out of passing guys. They seemed to take it a lot better than a lot of the girls. But what were you going to do? You knew these people, and passions could run deep.

You did have a few people you were friends with congratulate you. They grinned, actually greeting Billy for the first time in their lives. They hugged you and assured you that you could always go to them. But, even though they seemed all for it, you didn’t trust them. You even asked Billy if there was a kick me sign on your back, just in case. He assured you there wasn’t.

“So...what now?” Billy asked as you walked out of the mall. The sky was dark, just glowing neon signs lighting up the sky. It was getting cooler at night now, a shiver rolling down your spine.

“I,” you paused, looking out into the quiet parking lot. “I don’t know. All of Hawkins probably knows by now. It was kind of how I thought it was going to go. Too many people want you for you to be locked down.”

“Well, it’s their loss,” Billy sighed, a small smile on his face. “You’re stuck with me now. - Should I take you home?”

You shook your head. “I don’t know. - I don’t really want you to go.”

“I can sneak back in later,” he promised, leading you to where his car was parked. You slid into the cool leather seats, staring absently ahead of you. “If you can’t go home, but you can’t stay here. What are you going to do?”

“I could always sneak in, I guess and leave before my dad gets up. Or go to Steve's, or Robin's, or even sneak into your place." You chuckled a bit at the last option, you'd done it so many times.

Silence filled the cab for a few minutes following. Billy lit up a cigarette, you rolled the down window. You hated the smell. Finally, Billy sighed, “When do you want to leave?”

“What?” you questioned, turning to him. He wasn’t looking at you.

“California,” he restated, “when do you want to go?”

You shrugged. “After today - whenever.”

“Don’t...Don’t say it if you don’t mean it, [Name].” Billy took a deep drag.

You tapped your fingers against the door panel. “I won’t start until next fall. So we still have time to save up money and all. There’s probably no way my parents will pay tuition now, though.”

Billy was silent a moment. “Well...there’s only one way to find out. - [Name] I gotta take you home.”

You shifted in your seat to look at him. “What? No! I -”

“I already had a shit relationship with my parents. But you didn’t. You gotta fix, at least, that before we go,” Billy said in a serious, even voice. He wasn’t serious often, not like this. The look on his face, guilty and painful, twisted up your stomach. You couldn’t say no.

“Fine,” you sighed, “But if they don’t let me in, we leave tonight. I’ll sneak in, pack, and leave.”

“That’s a bit rash, for you anyway,” Billy noted.

You shook your head. “If they’re going to be petty about this - I’m going to be petty too. I’m eighteen, I can make that decision now.”

Billy nodded, taking another long drag. “Fine, if that’s what you want.”

The ride was silent. No talking, laughter, or music. Just the rush of air through the open windows. And the ride was over all too soon. You were suddenly sat in front of your house. The one you’d grown up in, the one that cradled you through broken bones and aching hearts. The one that saw your first steps, and your first loose tooth, and your first kiss on the front stoop in eighth grade on Halloween. Now it’d seen your first fight with your parents.

You couldn’t bring yourself to get out and knock on the door. But you didn’t have to. The front door opened, and your mom waved to you. You waved back. Then your dad appeared behind her. He beckoned you in. You stiffened, gripping Billy’s hand tighter.

“I’ll still be here, I’ll park down the block if you’re not out in ten. I’ll go through in your window,” Billy muttered, brushing his lips against your knuckles. You smiled, kissing him properly before getting out. You’d just gotten around the front of Billy’s car when you heard him too grumbled into the night. You rapped on the hood and nodded at the front door. Billy was quick to get out and join you at the front.

You father disappeared back into the house. But your mother let you in. You followed her, Billy in tow by his hand, down the hall to the kitchen. Your father was sat at the head of the table. Where he always was. You felt queasy, you couldn’t enough comfort from just holding Billy’s hand. Not this time.

Your father gestured to the table chairs. You two sat, your mother across from you. You and Billy held hands under the table. Everything was quiet for longer than you’d have liked. Finally, your dad let out a long, loud sigh. 

“ I cannot voice how disappointed I am, [Name],” he groaned, rubbing one temple.

“Dad -” you started, your mom reached a hand towards you.

“Of all the people in town...but,” he continued, he sounded more pained with every word. “I don’t want to lose you. So...I suppose, if he proves his reputation differently, then I won’t have an issue.”

“Re-Really?” Your chest squeezed. You hadn’t expected that.

“But he has to prove himself to me first. Also, no one said I had to like him. And there’s going to be some ground rules. First, no sex -”

“Oh, geezus, dad!” you whined, you didn’t have the guts to tell him it was too late for that. Billy squeezed your thigh, you tried to inconspicuously swat at him. But he just smirked at you.

“I’m just saying. And you have to be back before nine.”

You met his eyes. “Eleven.”

“Nine thirty.” Your dad caught sight of the look your mom gave him. “Fine, ten.”

You nodded. “And - what about college?”

“I...suppose...we’ll fund it. But you have to go this coming fall -”

“Already on it,” you gloated, “but we, as in Billy and I, not me, Billy, and dad, are going to make the best decision for us.”

“Fine, but you both have to keep jobs,” your dad bartered. You nodded, Steve could probably get you something. And Billy could charm his way into anything. “And you have to take your siblings to school.”

“Seriously?” you groaned. Your dad narrowed his eyes at you. “Fine. But I have a few rules of my own...”

The next hour was sat awkwardly bartering rules. Your parents didn't take the California news well. But they'd already agreed to let you guys determine what you wanted. So you were free to make your decision as you saw fit. And you knew what you wanted, a future happily with Billy. The man who was hard to love and who hardly loved.

Overall, judgment day went better than expected. People showed their true colors. But Billy had been right, you were better off without them. You now knew who your real friends were. You two were the talk of Hawkins for a few weeks following. But you didn't care. You finally had a future worth looking forward to. 

Watch out, California. Here you come.

[therainroguefanfiction]

🔥 ℝise Ⱥbove I̾t ◈ Chapter 025 [Top Two]

📑 Table of Contents | ◂Backward

Word Count: 2,581

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〈“You should see me in a crown. Your silence is my favorite sound. Watch me make ’em bow, one by one.” Billie Eilish, “You Should See Me In A Crown”〉

⊱ ────── {⋅. 🔥 .⋅} ────── ⊰

“Umm… why the heck are you all here?” Ochaco cried out, distress clear in her voice. Dozens of students were crowding around the outside of our classroom, whispering and taking pictures of us. What, are we a fucking exhibit at the zoo now?

“Do you students have some sort of business with our class?” Iida questioned.

“Why are you blocking our doorway? I won’t let you take us hostage!” Mineta cried out. As if that short idiot could do anything.

“They’re scouting out the competition, idiots.” Bakugo headed for the door and I followed, slinging the strap of my bag over my shoulder. “We’re the class that survived a real villain attack. They wanna see us with their own eyes.” He stopped at the door, narrowed eyes scanning the students. “At least now you know what a future pro looks like. Now, move it extras!”

I chuckled. Typical Bakugo. To think that one word changed our relationship. I wonder, would we be friends if I hadn’t learned who he was?

“You can’t just walk around calling people extras just because you don’t know who they are!” Iida complained, waving his hand frantically.

I raised a brow at him. “The fuck you talking about, man? He calls everyone extras, even the fuckers he does know.”

“So this is class 1-A?” A boy with a mop of purple hair pushed his way to the front of the group, a black-haired boy close behind. This kid over here lookin’ like Doc Brown’s reject son. “I heard you guys were impressive, but you just sound like an ass. Is everyone in the hero course delusional or just you?”

“Sick burn, bro.” I snickered.

“Shut up, bitch!”

“How sad to come here to find a bunch of ego-maniacs.” The boy rubbed the back of his neck.

“It’s tragique.” The black-haired boy nodded.

“I wanted to be in the hero course, but like many others here, I was forced to choose a different track. Such is life. I didn’t cut it the first time around, but I have another chance. If any of us do well in the sports festival, the teachers can decide to transfer us to the hero course. And they’ll have to transfer people out to make room.”

Several people grew nervous behind us, Izuku included. While I don’t doubt the validity of his statement, I think the only people at real risk of being yanked from class 1-A is Invisigirl and the perverted Grape. I can’t speak for class 1-B, though, not that that has anything to do with us.

“‘Scouting the competition’?” Purple continued. “Maybe some of my peers are, but I’m here to let you know that if you don’t bring your very best, I’ll steal your spot right from under you. Consider this a declaration of war.”

“Heh~ but we‘re the egomaniacs, right?” I scoffed, meeting his dull purple eyes. “Ever heard of the expression, ‘The pot calling the kettle black’? Besides, if you weren’t good enough to make it the first time, what makes you think you can replace people that were good enough?”

His eyes narrowed.

The black-haired boy beside him scoffed. “You guys are whaq with a q.”

“‘Whack’ isn’t spelled with a fucking q, you twat.” I responded.

“It’s reserved for special cases like you!”

“Are you stupid?”

“I’m lucid sometimes.”

“Hey, you!!” A silver-haired boy joined the fray, pushing and shoving his way through the crowd as he screamed at the top of his lungs. “I’m from class 1-B next door to you! We heard you fought some villains and I came to see if that was true! You’re just a bunch of brats who think you’re better than us!!”

“Goddamn. And I thought you were loud, Bakuhoe.” I scowled, rubbing my temple. I could feel a headache starting to form from the sheer volume of his voice.

“Talk all you want, it’ll just be more embarrassing when you’re K.O’d!!”

Bakugo moved forward.

“Don’t you ignore me!!”

“Dude, where are you going?” Kirishima rushed forward. “You gotta say something! It’s your fault they’re all hating on us, Bakugo! You, too, Winchester!”

“The fuck’d I do?” I muttered.

“These people don’t matter,” Bakugo responded, simply.

“Huh?”

“The only thing that’s important is that I beat them. Let’s go, Tiger.”

Kirishima sent me a pleading look and I shrugged. “You got what you wanted, Kiri. He said somethin’.” I followed the blonde as he moved through the crowd, the students jumping away from his glaring red eyes.

“Hey!! I’m coming for you!!”

“Hopefully quieter next time,” I muttered, folding my hands behind my head. “I’m hungry, let’s go get tacos.”

“Fuck no. We’re getting ramen.” He glanced at me. “And then we’re going to train.”

I scowled. “You always go to that place that serves only spicy ramen. I hate it.”

“Your quirk is fire but you can’t even handle spicy food. Pathetic.”

“My quirk ain’t about sweatin’, fool. And I never agreed to train with you, either.”

“Too fuckin’ bad,” He suddenly stopped, shoving his finger in my face. “Me and you are gonna destroy all of those damn losers and then I’m gonna thoroughly beat your ass in the final, you got that?!”

I sweatdropped, looking away. “That sounds like a lot of work, man.”

“Suck it up, weakling!”

Geez, once this brat sets his mind on something, there’s no stopping him. This is gonna be a serious pain in my ass.

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“I’m home,” I muttered, pushing the door open and kicking my sneakers off before heading to the kitchen. “What the fuck are you doin’, bro?”

Aizawa grunted in annoyance. Both of his thickly bandaged arms were out of their sling, a cup of instant noodles dangling precariously between them. “You’re late,”

I took the cup from his arms, holding up the plastic bag in my other hand. “Sorry. Bakugo’s a real bitch when it comes to training. And everything else in general.”

He fell into the chair at the kitchen table. “You’re training with him?”

I pulled two plates from the cabinet, dividing the box of chicken bites between them before adding a spoonful of mac-n-cheese, green beans, and mashed potatoes with gravy. I set both plates on the table before getting a Dr. Pepper for myself and some juice for him. “I didn’t want to, but he wouldn’t stop bitching about it and then he smacked me when I wasn’t looking, so I humored him. Then I actually got into it and lost track of time.” I plopped down beside him.

Due to his excessive injuries, Aizawa needed someone to help him out at home and since I wasn’t able to protect him from the bird brain fucker, I told Toshi that I’d be staying with Zawa ’til he recovers. The man in question certainly wasn’t happy about needing to be helped, especially not by me, but the alternative was the loud-mouth Present Mic, so he settled.

He was struggling to pick up the fork so I grabbed it for him, holding it up so his finger could wrap around the metal. “I’m surprised he’s gotten so close to you. I don’t know if that’s a good thing, though.”

“Probably not, but at least I’m finally starting to socialize, right?”

He stared at me blankly.

“Tough crowd,”

“What are your plans for the sports festival?”

“Care to be more specific?”

“Are you going to give it your all? You haven’t shown much interest in going pro.”

I leaned back in my chair, stirring my mashed potatoes with the fork. “Dunno. I’ve been thinking about it… everyone is so hyped for the sports festival, so I feel like I should match that by giving it my all, you know? At the same time… everyone else has a clear goal, a dream to become a pro and this is their big chance to get noticed. Well, one of ’em, anyway. Kinda feels like I shouldn’t take that away from them. Plus…”

“You’re scared,” he commented, dryly.

I scowled, propping my chin in my palm. “I ain’t scared, I’m worried, there’s a difference. I don’t wanna hurt anyone, especially if this is gonna be like a one-on-one battle royale or whatever. Bakugo has this shit idea in his head that the two of us are gonna be the top two – with him taking first, of course. I kinda wanna beat him just to spite him, but that’ll cause me a bigger headache in the future. He’s pretty damn strong, too.”

“You don’t think you can beat him?” He stabbed a piece of chicken, bringing it to his mouth.

I shrugged. “Won’t know that unless we fight. I feel like my raw power is better than his, but I rely on instinct alone, while he relies on instinct and intelligence. I’d rather not fight him if I can avoid it, it’ll be too much of a pain in the – Ow, that fucking hurt, you bitch!” I rubbed the back of my hand which he had just stabbed with his fork.

“Stop being lazy, Jen. Whether you plan to go pro or not, as a student of U.A. you represent the school through your actions.”

“Isn’t that even more reason to air on the side of caution?” I scowled. “Think about how shit it would be if I lost control during the sports fest. Talk about an image ruiner.”

“Are you planning on killing anyone?”

“The fuck kinda question is that? Of course not.” I paused. “Though, I wouldn’t be above killing Mineta, not even gonna lie. If I have to fight him, I’mma destroy him.”

He ignored my last comment. “Then you should be fine.” His eyes met mine and his gaze softened. “Just do your best and stop stressing so much.”

“Hey, Zawa?”

“Hmm?”

I chewed on my lip, thoughtfully. Should I tell him about that voice I heard back at the USJ? No matter what kinda world you live in, hearing voices ain’t a good thing, but… it was probably just a hallucination brought on from the extreme stress. I don’t wanna worry him or bug him, especially when he’s still healing. I smiled softly, “You always act tough but you’re just a big ole softy, ain’t ya – ow, fuck, Aizawa!”

⊱ ────── {⋅. 🔥 .⋅} ────── ⊰

The day of the sports festival had finally arrived and the stadium was packed with people. Various food stalls had been set up outside, including a glorious taco stand. Me and the rest of class 1-A had been ordered to change into our gym uniforms and hang out in the waiting room until we were called out, but I had woken up late and missed breakfast. Plus, tacos.

While the others nervously and excitedly chatted with one another about the sports fest, I slipped out of the room and out to the front where the food stalls were located. My mouth started to water at all the glorious smells teasing my nose, my stomach growling and whining at me. I stopped behind a woman with a small child, trying not to tap my foot impatiently as she waited on her food. Finally, she stepped away and I moved forward.

The man at the stall was older, maybe late fifties or early sixties, with a mess of gray hair. A thin, white bandana had been wrapped around his forehead, the name ‘Shimatsu Tacos!’ written in bold red lettering with a taco between the two words.

He smiled kindly, wrinkles appearing around his mouth. “What can I get for you?”

“Five soft shell tacos, please.” I dug around in my pocket for the money I had shoved there after changing out of my uniform.

“Coming right up!” He hummed as he started to cook the beef and toast the shells.

“Hey, you!” An arm slung around my shoulder and I scowled at the contact, slapping my palm against the woman’s face and shoving her away from me. Her hand grabbed my shoulder, refusing to let go. “Hey, what are you doing?!”

“Don’t fucking touch me, rude ass.” I stomped my foot down on hers and she finally let go.

“Ow, that hurt, you brat!” Her purple eyes narrowed at me as she clutched her foot, blonde hair bouncing as she hopped on the other foot.

“Don’t fucking touch people without their permission.” I folded my arms over my chest.

“Listen here, you little -”

“Mt. Lady!” A man grabbed her wrist before she could grab me. He looks like… a leafless tree in a tight blue one-piece. ‘Kay, then. “You can’t attack a student, what are you thinking?”

“This brat attacked me.” She huffed.

I rolled my eyes. “I stomped on your foot because you grabbed me and wouldn’t let go. Get over it.”

“See! She admitted it!” She pointed an accusing finger at me. Bitch, are you five?

“You shouldn’t have grabbed her,” Woodsman scolded before turning to me, softening his voice. “And you shouldn’t attack people.”

“Che,” I looked away from him, turning back to the old man as he handed me my food. Each taco was wrapped separately and all of them were placed in a small, cardboard container.

“Here you are, enjoy!”

“How much do I owe you?”

“Not a thing!” He grinned, giving me a thumbs up. “Just do your best in the sports festival!”

I hummed as something behind him caught my eye. “Hey, can I have that?”

His eyes followed mine and he seemed to realize what I was planning to do. He laughed loudly, taking it down from the peg it hung on and handing it over to me. “Good luck, kid!”

“Thanks,” I sent him a smile before turning toward the stadium.

“Wait a minute! I’m not done with you!” The woman grabbed my shoulder. “You need to learn some respect, kid!”

I scoffed, slapping her hand away. “And you need to learn to keep your hands to your fuckin’ self. Respect is earned, it ain’t given freely, and you ain’t done shit to earn my respect so fuck off, old lady.”

“O-Old?!”

Hmm, how annoying. I weaved my way through the crowd of people, munching on one of the tacos as I re-entered the stadium. I pushed open the door to our waiting room and stopped short as the tense atmosphere.

“- Of course you’re better than me.” Izuku was saying as he faced Todoroki. “In fact, you probably have way more potential than anyone in the hero course. That’s why you got in so easily.”

Fucking rude, you little shit.

“Midoriya, maybe you’re being a little hard on yourself. And us…” Kirishima spoke up, holding his hands up. He was clearly trying to defuse the situation.

“No, he’s right, guys! All the other courses… they’re coming for us with everything they’ve got. We’re all gonna have to fight to stand out. And I’ll be aiming for the top, too!���

“Fine,” Todoroki responded, his voice ice cold.

“Sheesh, you guys are a couple of edgelords, ain’t ya?” I commented before taking another bite of the taco.

“Winchester! Where did you disappear to?” Kiri asked, his eyes snapping to the food in my hand. “Hey, where did you get that food? And where’s mine?”

“Food stand,” I answered. “If I share with you, I’d have to share with the whole class and I ain’t about that life. Sorry, bro.”

He sweatdropped.

“Um, Jen-san?”

“What, Izuku?”

“…why are you wearing a bandana around your forehead that says ‘Shimatsu Tacos’?”

“Don’t question my fashion choices, you little shit.”

“R-Right…”

⊱ ────── {⋅. 🔥 .⋅} ────── ⊰

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📜 Read more by checking out my masterlist 📜

[kohanayaki]

Caught in the Middle (Steve Harrington x Reader x Billy Hargrove) Ch 6

Links: Ch 1   Ch 2   Ch 3  Ch 4  Ch 5  Ch 6  Ch 7

_____________________________________________________

Ch 6 .:Stupid:.

The next few weeks went by as usual, at least that's what it seemed like to the rest of the people in your school. Billy would still come up to you and be an annoying little shit, and you'd tell him to fuck off. To the outside eye it seemed like he was just playing a losing game. 

“Dude, I don't even know why you're still trying to get at that,” Tommy said to him one day, “I mean, do you really want to stick your dick in crazy?”

With you, it seemed like you couldn't count the number of girls who gave you dirty looks in the hallway. Billy's advances towards other girls became few and then none besides you.

“What's so special about her anyways?” they'd jeer out of jealousy.

“Don't worry,” another would say, “He'll drop her as soon as he gets bored.”

You would only smirk to yourself as you walked by. They had no idea.

You were surprised no one had picked up on it yet- the way both of you would disappear from your regular tables at lunch, coming back looking just a little more disheveled than when you had left. Stealing kisses behind the gym and during the end of passing period when everyone had already gone to class. The dark marks on your necks he hid with the collar of his leather jacket and you with your denim one. 

He would always sneak into your room like he did that night, sometimes to talk and sometimes to do things that required little talking at all. It's gotten heated before, but surprisingly he had never pushed you to do anything you weren't comfortable with. In other words, you hadn't gone all the way. 

Part of you wanted to so badly, but the other part was just nervous to hook up with the school's most infamous playboy. You didn't want to get your hopes up, but you've never seen Billy try so hard to get a girl even in the short time you've known each other, You've seen him make passes at girls before. Of course, the usual reaction was for them to practically get on their knees for him right then and there, but in the rare case he was rejected he just brushed it off, starting to flirt with their friends or whatever girl was walking past at the time. But with you he was more than persistent. After your kiss in your room it seemed like he stopped flirting with other girls all together, but what did that really mean? What was this thing between you two anyways? You'd never really talked about it, and you've been hiding it from everyone at school. You understood why he might want to, you weren't exactly popular among his dipshit friends.

All these thoughts and questions swirled around in your mind as you sat at the breakfast table.

“Uh oh she's thinking, guys. Everybody run,” Kyle grinned.

“Shut it,” you huffed, pushing him away from you. 

He laughed as he swiped up his bowl of cereal from the table, walking over to the fridge to get the milk. As he did your eyes widened with realization.

“Oh my god, those are my pants,” you said incredulously, staring at the tight fitting leather on your brother. “Dad!”

Your father turned around to look, quickly regretting it and swiveling in the other direction to engross himself in the newspaper. 

“Oh come on, (Y/n), they look so much better on me,” Kyle said, posing for emphasis.

You groaned, your forehead meeting the table. 

“By the way, can I take the car today?”

Your head shot up at your brother's words.

“Absolutely not,” you said, “What, you take my pants and now you want to take my car too?”

“I'll be careful!” he promised, “Please?”

“No,” you said, “I don't want to die because my idiot brother can't drive anything bigger than a golf cart.”

“You won't have to be in the car,” he said. 

“What?” you said in confusion, “How do you expect me to get to school then?”

Kyle's grin turned dangerous as he nodded his head towards the window by the front door. As if on cue, a car horn beeped twice outside your house. You jogged over to the door, opening it to find Billy in his Camaro with Max in the back. As you ran over to him he rolled his window down.

“What the hell are you doing here?” you said. Despite your words, you couldn't help the dumb grin on your face.

“I'm giving my girlfriend a ride to school,” he said, as if it was obvious. 

You and Max nearly choked at the same time. 

Billy chuckled at the look of surprise on your face.

“Yeah,” he said, one hand on the wheel, “Least I could do. You're my girl.”

You hated how your heart pounded in your chest as he said that. In that moment it was like every worry your mind had been racing with a few minutes ago had disappeared.

“You're an idiot, Billy Hargrove,” you said.

“So I've been told,” he grinned. 

You turned around to see Kyle smirking at you and you sighed. 

“Don't kill anyone,” you said, tossing him your keys before climbing in the passenger seat of Billy's car. 

Billy gave you a quick kiss before you could even reach for your seat belt, and you saw Max mimic gagging in the rear view mirror.

You spent the drive in comfortable silence, and Max was slightly surprised, looking between the two of you. Billy hadn't yelled at her at all, and he was usually in the worst mood in the mornings. Maybe this thing you had going on could be a nice change of pace. To Max it seemed like you were a breath of fresh air for Billy, and she'd rarely seen her step brother in a serious relationship before. 

As Billy pulled up to his usual parking spot you could see Tommy and Carol on the other side of the street, waiting for him. You felt a pit start to form in the bottom of your stomach.

“Are you sure this is a good idea?” you asked, “Everyone's going to know.”

“That's sort of the point,” he said, flicking you lightly on the forehead. 

You pouted, swatting his hand away.

“You know what I mean,” you said. 

“Just ignore them,” he said, “Trust me.”

Those were dangerous words, but somehow you found yourself following them.

You got out of the car hesitantly, Max following. She skated away towards the middle school as Billy got out of the driver's seat. 

Everyone's eyes were on you, some shocked but mostly jealous. You wanted to shrink away into the ground, but before you could backtrack on your confidence Billy snaked his arms around your waist and pulled you into a kiss. You could practically hear the gasps around you and you resisted the urge to roll your eyes at both them and Billy's flair for the dramatic. Even though he's kissed you a hundred times, it was always in secret. Now you were letting the whole school see, and as nervous as you were, it was exhilarating and almost sweet of Billy to show he wasn't embarrassed to be with you.

You moved up to sit on the hood of his car, and your hands found their way into his hair. As his teeth tugged at your lower lip you pushed him away slightly.

“Billy, we're right next to a middle school,” you scolded him. He laughed at that. 

“I told you the point was for everyone to know, remember?”

Meanwhile Max was looking around for her usual group, sighing as she found them huddled around Lucas' binoculars while they stared at you and Billy in shock. 

“What are you idiots up to now?” Max said. 

Everyone jumped as she suddenly came up behind them and Dustin pulled her down behind the fence so she wouldn't be seen. 

“Can you believe this?” Mike scoffed, “How could (Y/n) fall for that asshole? No offense,” he said, looking at Max.

“None taken, it's the truth,” Max replied.

“No, no, no! This isn't how it was supposed to go,” Dustin said, “She's supposed to be with Steve!”

The boy in question was currently standing with his friends on the other side of the parking lot, watching as Billy scooped you up into his arms. You squealed when he did, telling him to put you down in between fits of laughter. Steve knew he had no right to be jealous, but his heart twisted as he watched you two together. He felt stupid for not saying anything to you sooner, and now he might have just lost his chance with you for good.

The rest of the day was the most tolerable one you could remember going through in a while. You couldn't explain it, but you just felt lighter. Maybe it was because you had something to look forward to afterwards. 

Billy had pulled you aside at lunch, saying he wanted to take you to a record shop after school and then grab some dinner. You, of course, accepted, and you spent the rest of the lunch period listening  to your favorite bands together in the old music room. 

Tommy and Carol noticed Billy's absence; Everyone did, really. When the King of Hawkins High wasn't around it was a noticeable change. Mostly it was quieter and people were less terrified of waiting in line at the cafeteria. 

Tommy's eyes narrowed as he caught Billy sneaking back into his next period in the dark while the class was watching a movie on the projector screen. Through the window to the hallway he could just make out your figure retreating back to your own class with the hall pass in your hand. Needless to say he wasn't happy in the slightest. 

When the last bell rang students flooded the hallways, eager to go home, but none of them as eager as you and Billy due to the promise of a date. Billy stopped by his locker, carelessly tossing his textbooks inside before shutting it only to find Tommy and Carol in front of him.

“We need to talk, Hargrove,” Tommy said.

“About what?” Billy asked casually, playing it off. He started to walk back towards the parking lot but Tommy cut in front of him, blocking his way.

“You know what,” the older boy glared, “What the fuck was that stunt this morning? Don't tell me you're actually dating that freak.”

Billy bit back a scowl as Tommy insulted you, and he managed a forced reply instead of immediately punching him.

“Don't worry about it,” Billy said.

“Well I'm going to if you're actually going through with this,” Tommy said, “I hope you know if you're seen with her for more than one day you can kiss your reputation goodbye. People are already starting to talk.”

Panic seeped into his mind like a lethal injection. That struck a chord in Billy harder than he'd like to admit. He felt so stupid for giving a damn about what anyone else in this shitty town thought of him, but deep down he craved the popularity, the notoriety. His King title gave him something he'd rarely ever known in his life- respect. People bent over backwards for him, did anything he asked. Guys would kill to be friends with him, girls would kill to sleep with him. 

But was that really him? He knew it wasn't. It was all just a front. A mask he used to forget all the shit he had to deal with and manipulate people into doing what he wanted. And for some reason he found himself taking that mask off when he was with you. You didn't care about his popularity or his social circle or even about him when you first met. You weren't afraid to call him out on his bullshit. You were unapologetically yourself, and that's what Billy liked about you.

But in that moment, surrounded by his friends like some kind of intervention, his old self got the better of him. If he just said something to get them off his back he could go out with you without having to deal with them.

“I told you not to worry about it,” Billy said, “It's nothing serious, man.”

You bounded down the main hallway, a small smile on your face as you finished up at your locker and made your way over to the front where Billy's car was parked. Everyone else had gone home by now, the halls quickly clearing within ten minutes after school was over. However you heard some voices travel down the rows of lockers and you stopped in your tracks as you recognized them. 

You could hear Billy laughing, but it didn't sound like it usually did. It sounded forced, unnatural.

“You sure about that?” you heard Tommy say. 

What were they talking about?

“Of course,” Billy said, “She’s a tough one to crack, I'll give you that, but I’ll have her soon enough. If not, it's on to the next one, right? Plenty of fish in the sea.” 

The words left a bad taste in his mouth, and Billy grimaced as Tommy clapped him on the shoulder. It was nothing worse than what he'd normally say around them, but for some reason he started to feel guilty for saying something like that about you, even if it wasn't true.

“That's what I thought,” Tommy said, “Fuck 'em and leave 'em, right? Especially girls like her, it's all they're good for.”

Billy hesitated before saying anything. Part of him wanted to bash Tommy's head into the lockers until he stopped moving, but he forced his anger down and grit his teeth hard. 

“Yeah, right,” he said, regretting the words as soon as they left his mouth.

'At least now they'll be out of the way,' he thought, 'As long as she never finds out I said that, we can go on like normal.'

But you'd already heard him, and the damage was done.

You felt like your feet were cemented into the floor, slowly pulling you down like quicksand. It took you a moment to process what he just said, but once you did you felt like vomiting. 

Stupid. 

Stupid, stupid, so fucking stupid. 

This wasn't any different from all the other times. How could you think Billy actually gave a damn about you? That he would change for you? People like him couldn't change. . . you figured you should have known that much after all the shit your exes put you through. But you still fell for it- the same act he probably pulled with all the girls he wanted to sleep with while telling them she was the only one. 

You willed yourself to move and you turned around, heading off in the opposite direction. You gave your brother the keys since Billy gave you a ride this morning, and he'd already gone home. You pushed open the door, feeling numb despite the hot sun beating down on you. 

You quickly took out a few quarters and put them into the school's payphone on the brick wall, dialing your home phone. 

“Come on, pick up,” you pleaded to yourself. When the dial tone repeated itself one too many times you got the voice message response and you slammed the phone back on the wall with a clang!

How the hell were you supposed to get home? 

Suddenly a pair of arms snaked around your waist and you tensed up, knowing full well who it was, turning around and pushing his body away from you. 

As soon as Billy saw your expression he knew something was wrong, and he hoped to whatever force was out there in the universe that it wasn't because of what he thought it was.

“What’s wrong, princess?” he asked.

Billy stood there with his head cocked to the side slightly, looking confused, and that only made you angrier. 

He's playing dumb. 

Well, dumber.

“Don’t princess me, Hargrove,” you glared at him.

His stomach dropped as you call him by his last name, something you hadn’t done since he kissed you that first night.

“I was right about you,” you said, “You're just like the rest of them, stringing me along and manipulating me until you got me to have sex with you and then you'd go on pretending I never existed. I don't know why I thought you'd be any different. . . I don't know why I was stupid enough to think I was different to you, either.”

Every one of your words was a punch to the gut to Billy, but he stood there and took it, because he knew he deserved it. As he saw tears start to well up in your eyes he couldn't think of anything to say. Certainly not any kind of excuse. 

You grit your teeth, turning away from him as you wiped the burning tears from your face. There was no way you'd let him see you cry. Not him.

“You're my girl,” you chuckled humorlessly, quoting his words from just a few hours ago, “What a load of bullshit.”

“I fucked up,” Billy said, exasperated.

“Damn straight you did!” you shouted, your head whipping back around to look at him. His heart stopped when your eyes met his, and all he could think about was how much pain you were in and the fact that he was the cause of it. 

“You know I tried to stay away from you because I just knew this was how it would end,” you said, “I didn't want this to be serious. I didn't want to hear you say that I was your girl, because I didn't want to feel like shit when you went back on your word. So congratulations, Billy Hargrove, you've checked off every regret I thought this might turn out to be in a single afternoon.”

He tried to say something as he watched you start to walk away, but the words caught in his throat. He started to walk after you, his pace quickening as he reached for your arm. 

Your head snapped to look at him as you twisted yourself around, grabbing his wrist before he could get to you. 

“Don't fucking touch me,” you said, biting the inside of your cheek as your voice came out sounding a lot more broken than you'd wanted. Still, you pressed on.

“Find another bitch to fuck with, Hargrove,” you said, shoving him away, “Plenty of fish in the sea, right?”

You turned around, stuffing your hands in the pockets of your jacket as you started to walk home. You were miles away and it would take you hours, but you didn't care as long as it got you away from Billy. As the anger drained out of your body sadness replaced it, and with your back turned to him you finally allowed yourself to let the tears roll down your cheeks. 

Billy could tell you were crying even if he couldn't see you, and he felt like the scum of the earth. When you disappeared around the street corner he clenched his fists at his sides so hard his nails nearly broke skin. He'd just ruined possibly the best thing to ever happen to him and for what? His stupid high school reputation? His friends that didn't give two shits about him? 

Before he knew what was happening his fist collided with the brick tile of the wall, a sickening crack ringing out through the empty parking lot as he sucked in air through his teeth, looking down at his now-bloody knuckles. 

“Fuck,” he seethed under his breath, hating himself more with each passing second.

Stupid. 

Read Chapter 7 here!

Taglist: @in-my-dreams-2000 @ggclarissa @iris1697 @5sosxgrethan @ohnoniella @sarcasticalphaofthelooserspack @aspiring-fangirls-world @wow-im-so-tired @hopesxxhigh @justanothercrazyassfangirl @too-many-lanes @whimsylavender @bish-ima-clown @amarachoren @mosiacbrokenheartstf @mcuvlxgs @xapham @metuel18 @immirandaq @nellaphine @multi-madison @gingertalksshit @jojo-buttercup @kyberhearts @mvdelaine @minnie-marvel @caitlin-rose28 @zandaleekrz @r3inventedd @void-fire-rose @macymafia @wanna-be-idle @newtsshelbys @kimmydespell @weyheyokay @r4ttusr4ttus @cynthianokamaria @spookyartisanmuffineggs @youcanstandundermyamberella @ashadowoftheforest @shrektiledysfunction @arithatonegirl @banannie25 @daddyuwuss @truthdaze @supervoldejaygent @gigi-maria-argu  

[okaybutlikeimagine]

consider this: Steve couldnt get to college so he went to police academy instead, working with Hopper is a part of his internship and the more time they spend together the closer they become, at first Billy is happy that they get along but then Hop can't seem to shut up about Steve and his achievements so Billy starts getting jealous and worried that he will never be able to make Jim proud like this

Ohmydearrr!!! Okay i’ve seen a few things talking about Steve and/or Billy joining the police force in Hawkins and i just? Love it. I think it’s so good. And This is so good bc we know Bratty Billy = Jealous Billy.

So Steve, being the lovely little dummy that he is, is unable to get into college. I love him dearly, i think we all do, but also I don’t think college is even right for the boy. It’s a totally viable option to just Not go to college. That’s 100% fine and I think that Steve was very gently told that by people like Joyce and Jonathan and Nancy and Billy (who may not have been as gentle and might have been a bit more like: College doesn’t deserve you! Fuck college, you can still do whatever you want without college, goddamnit!!)

And when Hop hears that Steve’s been struggling with this, he puts a large, comforting hand on Steve’s shoulder and says: “y’know… we’ve been thinking about getting some more officers…”

So Steve starts his internship!! And lemme tell you, Hop is tough on him at the beginning. And the other officers + Flo watch him really put Steve through the paces and they’re like: “Hop. Give the boy some slack, this job is mostly about getting cats from trees and catching kids who kick pumpkins in on Halloween.”

But Hop is 1. Paranoid about more government monster shit happening

And 2. Kinda having fun messing around w/ his son’s boyfriend. Just to get him a little scared, give him a little reminder that “Hey, I’m big and tough and can crush you in a second, so be wary.”

But after about a week or two of Hop putting Steve through the paces, Steve being tired as all hell just about 24/7, and Billy bitching at Hop about how “You’re trying to kill my boyfriend, huh? Quit working him so hard, he’s tired as hell every day because of you!”

Well… the Officers think it’s time to give Steve a little break.

So they invite him out to Guys Night. Which is just heading to a bar and getting just a little buzzed. And yeah, Steve isn’t 21 yet, but Hop has known the owner of the bar for decades now and they know he won’t card Steve. Plus… it’s the police that are bringing the boy in and letting him drink. So like… who’s gonna get called on him, y’know??

So Steve is strung tight, sitting uncomfortably as all the guys laze around and chat, Officer Callahan telling him how he trained under Hop when he was working on being an Officer and “let me tell you, the guy is a brute. He can be such a dick.”

“I’m right here, you idiot.”

“Yeah, but you like me now.”

“I can dislike you real quick if you keep talking.” Hop says over his glass of whiskey.

And Steve relaxes over time. Laughs with the guys like they’re his friends and they kinda do become his friends?? Officer Powell talks to him about the craziest things he’s seen on the job. Callahan is giving Steve tips on what to do with cats stuck in trees if you’re allergic. (Steve isn’t, but he listens to the advice anyway bc he’d feel rude not to). Hop hits Steve on the back and laughs big rolling laughs and Steve feels welcome.

Hop gets a lot easier on Steve as time goes on. Bc see, Hop never doubted Steve. He never thought the boy didn’t have it in him bc he’s seen the boy fight off scary as fuck monsters. And he still wishes he didn’t have to but… if anyone has what it takes to be a police officer in this fucked up town, it’s Steve. Plus it’ll be nice to have another person on the force who knows about all of the shit that’s really going on around here.

And after about a month, Hop is talking about Steve near constantly. He’s always talking about how good he did handling the Mr. Wilson today or how he knew just how to break up that fight between these two boys or how he’s gotten so good at writing out parking tickets that he doesn’t even need Hop anymore.

And some of the smallest, dumbest things make Hop beam and Billy watches it with growing pride in his chest bc Yup. That’s my boyfriend. I always knew he was good, fuck anyone who ever doubted him.

Except... 

He’ll ask Steve out and Steve will respond with: “Oh, you know I’d love to but… It’s Guys Night tonight.”

“Guys night?”

“Yeah, me and the other officers are going down to the bar. I’ve told you about it right? Anyway, they’re probably waiting on me so I’ve gotta go, bye babe!”

And the line goes dead.

And Billy’s livid.

Bc Steve and Hop are so buddy buddy now. Steve is always talking about how cool Hop is and how he shows him all of this different stuff and where the best donuts are sold and the different types of fucking paper airplanes you can make out of empty parking tickets and “Goddamnit do you guys every do your fucking jobs??”

And Hop is always gushing about Steve, even if it’s something stupid like knowing all the lyrics to some stupid Foghat song or how good he is at cleaning the cars or how respectful he is to old Mrs. James and Billy is just livid.

Because Billy feels like he could do anything, he could sprout wings and fly to the fucking sun and Hop would still be mooning over Steve being a “good egg” or some shit and he’s had enough. From what Billy has heard, Steve is barely doing anything and already Hop is praising him high and low.

So one day, when Hop is about to bring up going out on patrol with Steve again, Billy snaps.

“Steve Steve Steve Steve Steve! I get it! Steve is the best!”

Hop is shocked, watching Billy with wide eyes as he goes on.

“You should have just adopted him instead! He’s got a rough home life too, y’know?? He’s always alone, his parents barely talk to him, why didn’t you adopt him, huh? I’m surprised you don’t have pictures of him in your fucking wallet!”

Hop is blinking hard. “Billy, I-”

There’s a knock at the door. Billy waves Hop off as he goes to stand to get it.

“I’ve got it.” Billy growls, swinging the door open to find his boyfriend, smiling wide.”

“Hey, I-!”

“Oh, your buddy is here!” Billy spits to Hop, before storming out of the cabin.

Hop gives Steve a confused look before Steve follows his boyfriend outside.

“Billy, what’s up?”

“Why don’t you go talk to your partner? You guys are such good friends, no need to hang out with me anymore.”

Steve reaches out to stop Billy, holding him back as best he can. “Babe, what are you talking about?”

“All you ever talk about is Hop and all Hop ever talks about is you and it’s driving me crazy. Do you know how many times you’ve blown me off for Guy’s Night?”

Steve blinks. “I-”

“Seven. Seven times. It’s shit, Harrington. I’m so fucking sick of this.”

“I didn’t know-”

“Yeah, because no one fucking talks to me anymore.”

Steve wraps Billy up in a hug, kissing his cheek and down his jaw and onto his neck.

“Oh baby, I’m so sorry, I swear I didn’t mean it.” Steve coos, holding the squirming Billy tight. “I’ve just… I’ve been so excited. I found something I can do without having to go to college. I really like it. I should be sharing it with you though.”

“Yeah, well… whatever. I’m glad you’re fitting in and everything. Just… quit telling me how cool my dad is. It’s weird.” Billy says, squirming still but Steve isn’t letting go, still attached to Billy’s neck and chuckling against it.

“Alright, I’ll stop. I promise.”

“Thanks.” Billy mumbles against Steve’s lips before kissing him soundly.

Just then the sound of someone clearing their throat comes from the doorway, and both boys look to find Hop with his arms crossed.

“Hi Chief!” Steve says with a smile, but Billy is untangling himself from Steve to go confront Hop.

“You keep making sure you’re keeping my boyfriend safe! I don’t trust anyone around here. There has to be some maniacs in a small town like this.”

Hop rolls his eyes. “Yeah yeah.” He says, brushing Billy off before looking him seriously in the eye. “You know I’m proud of you for everything you do, right?”

Billy feels it in his chest, the warmth that rises up when Hop talks to him like he really is his son.

“Oh, sure. Would you be just as proud of me if I blew a bubble the size of my head like Steve apparently can?”

Hop smirks. “Yeah, I would, because your head is a lot bigger than Steve’s is.”

Billy shoves past Hop to get into the cabin, muttering a fakely bitter “I hate you.” as Hop laughs and walks off the porch.

But now he’s standing in the doorway and waving goodbye to them as they head off to work, happy to see his boyfriend so happy and to see his boyfriend and his dad get along and wow things just feel so nice.

[shooting-the-walls]

I watched His Last Vow, and, well..... here are my thoughts again

Quick thing before we start: I choose HLV because it is one of my favourite episodes, and what I feel is one of the best shot episodes. Usually, I can't make it to the end of it because I know what is going to happen and I can't stomach it. Anyway, enjoy my little angst-filled monologue!!!

• Uggggghhhhhh Magnussen is so creepy even to start with

• Quick question: why the fuck does he have "porn preference" in his little file?? Creepy, dude. Real creepy

• I hate Magnussen with a passion but ngl his house is pretty bomb

• Why has a got a statue of a knight on an ostrich, and why does the camera focus on it? Kinda random XD

• Clever how they never show him going down the stairs the storeroom. IMPORTANT LATER ON

• Lady Magnussen when she sees Magnussen: *quietly* what the fuck

• "She looked delicious" "yum-yum": EEUURRRRRGGGGHHHHHHHH

• "I have a condition": is that condition.... being a creepy weirdo???

• HEY SHE MAY BE AN OLD LADY BUT SHE'S A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN SO SHUT THE FUCK UP MAGNUSSEN

• "This isn't blackmail it is.... ownership": uhhhhhh, pretty sure it's blackmail mate

• I'M SORRY BUT WE DON'T JUST LICK PEOPLE'S FACES, WHO WERE YOU RAISED BY DUDE

• The driver knowing something's up: we stan a king

• BAKER STREET YEAAAAAH BITCHES

• The intro mussssiiiiiccccc: it will now be stuck in my head for days XD

• When you miss your bestie: :(

• John being clueless XD

• *doesn't know what to do* *makes tea*

• "He the drugs one?" "Nicely put John"

• "Who's Sherlock Holmes" "See, that does happen"

• I think John feels bad for snapping at her XD

• "THERE IS NOTHING THE MATTER WITH ME. Imagine I said that without shouting": me 24/7

• Dude we know you tryna look sexy but the tyre lever XD

• "It is a tiny bit sexy" "I know": *is forcefully reminded of Boyle screaming "later sluts"*

• "I'm not just browsing": MATE IT'S NOT BLOODY ARGOS LOL

• Why is John so fucking cocky? Like we get you're an adrenaline junkie but Jesus XD

• JOHN BAMF WATSON IS HERE GUYS

• "Nope, just used to a better class of criminal": truth

• "Arse end of the universe with the scum of the earth": Jooooohn be nice

• Sherlock just so casual like " Oh HIIIII"

• "They're havin' a fight": Oh, like..... a married couple....?

• "WEll NoT nOW": we stan a queen XD

• "Alright Shezza?": *John and Mary Watson, Mycroft, Mrs Hudson, Molly and NSY have joined the chat*

• MOLLY YAAAAAAAS QUEEN PUT HIM IN HIS FACE

• "Just. Stop it."

• They are so concerned and Sherlock can't see it and I CAN'T

• "Just some guy" Sherlock: JOHN YOU DIDN'T *is suddenly more in love than ever*

• Sherlock: *hears what he sounds like* *ROLLS EYES*

• Billy knows what's going ON

• "Hang on, weren't there other people?"

• "I've got Mrs Hudson on semi-permanent mute"

• "Why do you do that": IT'S BECAUSE HE LOVES YOU

• "Cross-dressing may have been a wiser path for you": Mycroft your uncle was a bloody QUEEN

• "foR GOD'S SAKE"

John: oh deary me

• The mardy lil "I'm just gonna sit in this chair"

• MYCROFT STOP TATTLING ON YOUR BROTHER

• Also the Holmes parents line dance: I feel like this fact is super underrated XD

• "Just look frightened and. Scuttle": I LOVE THIS SO MUCH

• "I think we'd both find that embarrassing": THE FACT THIS WAS AN IMPROVISATION MARTIN IS SUCH A FAB ACTOR

• "Okay, I'll let you know if I notice"

• "Don't appall me when I'm high": genuinely one of my favourite lines of the entire series

• "God no. Trying to recruit you": Sherlock knows his John so weeeeelllll

• "Stay out of my bedroom" John: *immediately goes for the bedroom*

• JANINE HEYYYYYYYYY

• "Sherl.....": John is having a fucking field day with the nicknames

• John's confused little face XD XD

• "You have a girlfriend" "Yes I have" *JOHN WATSON CANNOT COMPUTE*

• Damn they're starting with the aquarium shit early

• "You got that from a book" "Everyone got that from a book"

• I'm sorry but Sherlock Holmes acting straight it the weirdest thing EVER

• "Maybe I will....": OH GOD. If she knows "what he's really like" (ie gay), then she also knows how much he loves John (she was at the wedding), so she's basically saying "I'll tell him you're in love with him"

• John: OH YES. THIS. THIS IS SOME NICE CEILING. MMM. GOOD CEILING

• John is so hung up on dinner XD

• "With wine.... and sitting....": I love the idea that when Sherlock eats, he just walks around like munching on shit. Like John used to get out of the shower and when he opened the bathroom door Sherlock would be standing there rocking on his heels eating a scotch egg XD

• "It's in the fridge, it kept ringing": me as an adult

• John just being so armed

• OH GOD SHERLOCK YOU'RE SO DAMAGED LIKE SO MANY PRESSURE POINTS

• BITCH DON'T BRING UP REDBEARD

• Oi listen Magnussen you little bitch

• NO PLEASE DON'T

• Shut UP Magnussen: as a Brit I cannot condone what the fuck he's saying. I AM A PROUD BRIT

• WHYYY

• WHYYYYYYY ARE YOU PEEING IN THE FUCKING FIREPLACE: this is why Moriarty was better, the sweetie had manners

• "How do you know his schedule?" "Because I do"

• The fact that Sherlock's checked with Mary if John is available XD

• CAM news: OMG THE CAM LETTER FROM S3E2, it makes sense nowwww

• Sherlock is so good at pick-pocketing

• "...your head kicked in." "Do we really need so much colour?" "It passes the time"

• I'M SORRY HIS CUTE LIL FACE WITH THE RING BOOOXXXXX

• I am fully convinced Sherlock was pretending Janine was John when he made the proposal

• SHERLOCK YOU CAN'T GET ENGAGED TO BREAK INTO A FUCKING OFFICE

• SHERLLL BEING IN LOVE WITH YOU IS NOT HUMAN ERROR, PLS GET SOME SELF ESTEEM

• "Bit rude, I just proposed to her"

• Sherlock immediately knows something's going on

• "...white supremacist so who cares?": SHERLOCK YAAAAS

• "During our own burglary" aka "really u idiot"

• The fact he immediately dismisses Mary: HE'S SO SWEET HE DOESN'T WANT TO RUIN JOHN'S HAPPINESS

• OH MY GOD THE REVEAAAAAAAAAL

• That moment when he realised. He just realises. The deductions he ignored: they could have helped her

• NO MARY YOU SHOT HIM WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS

• I'M SORRY BUT SAYING YOU'RE SORRY DOESN'T RIGHT THIS

• The sirens: again, as I said, the way this episode is made is incredible

• People often remark on who turns up in his mind palace: I totally agree with the idea that the others are his heart, "and you should never let it rule your head"

• SHERLOCK CALLING HIMSELF STUPID IN HIS MIND PALACE OH SWEETIE NO

• The fact Anderson is there tho

• THE FACT THAT EVEN THE FLOWERS TILT JESUS THE DETAIL

• "Don't go into shock, obviously": woooooooow, thanks Mycroft

• Oh Redbeard, the sweet little dog: "They're putting me down too now"

• Oh come on, he was totally looking for John's room when he ran into Mary

• NO NOT THE PADDED ROOM

• You don't understand: I actually can't watch this scene. It freaks me out so much. It's so sad, and the acting is SO GOOD.

• "Pain. Heartbreak. Loss. Death.": I'm sorry, but isn't that everything Sherlock's been through with John almost?

• Magnussen: dude I ain't telling you who shot him

• "It's raining. It's pouring. Sherlock, is boring. I'm laughing. I'm crying. Sherlock, is dying": JESUS THIS SONG

• "Mrs Hudson will cry. And mummy and daddy will cry. And the woman will cry. And John will cry buckets and buckets. It's him I worry about the most. That wife..... John Watson is definitely in danger": THE FACT THAT THAT MAKES HIM COME BACK; I'm sorry but how can you deny Johnlock after that?? He literally COMES BACK FROM THE DEAD for John Watson. Also, note how he misses off Greg and Molly and Mycroft. He thinks they don't care but they do. They care so much, Sherlock.

• "Oh you're not getting better are you?"

• MARY STOP ACTING ALL FUCKING INNOCENT YOU FUCKING SHOT HIM

• "I'm buying a cottage": I mean why not

• The fact that they're fine with each other after insulting each other XD

• I maintain that Janine is Moriarty's secret sister

• "I have an interview with The One Show and I haven't made it up yet"

• "I know what kind of man you are. We could have been friends": AGAIN she totally knows he's gay

• The fact he's self-punishing by turning the morphine down MY BABY

• The fact Greg just wants a video XD: I still want a Special Features on one of the DVDs of "videos from Greg Lestrade's phone"

• Of COURSE Sherlock's broken out, what else were you expecting John?

• Mycroft's little hand gestures like "off you go peasant": we know you love Greg really Myc

• "...stalked him one night" "foLLOWED"

• YOU, JOHN. HE'S PROTECTING YOU YOU DIPSHIT

• The fact Sherlock went back to Baker Street, BLEEDING INTERNALLY, to put John's chair back <3<3<3

• "A façade. Remind you of anyone?"

• Of course you can't Sherlock XD

• The fact he won the house in a card game with a cannibal XD

• I love this scene. Everything just suddenly makes sense. Everything she's said suddenly has a different meaning

• "You were very slow": BECAUSE HE WAS IGNORING THE WARNING SIGNS SO HE DIDN'T WANT TO UPSET JOHN

• "Even Scotland Yard can get somewhere with that"

• I feel like Sherlock had a little bit of a panic when she pulled the gun out, because he KNOWS that John is sitting there and he can't lose John Watson

• She loves John but he loves John too.... too much man, too much

• She can barely turn: the fact she knows that she may have just lost John forever

• YAAAAS WE'RE AT THE HOLMES' GUYS

• "How is it only 2 o'clock, I am in agony"

• "Is this your laptop, Mycie?" "Upon which depends the security of the free world, yes, and you've got potatoes on it"

• "Am I happy, I haven't noticed?" *gets hit with cracker*

• MRS HOLMES WE STAN A QUEEN

• "Someone's put a bullet in my boy and if I ever find out who I will turn absolutely monstrous": *takes tea to said shooter*

• When the dad is the only sane one XD

• I think even Sherlock's dad can see how much his son is in love with John

• I'm sorry but the entirety of the first bit at the Holmes': I STAN IT GUYS

• "What exactly is the point of you!?"

• "What's going on" "Bloody good question": me in physics

• Jesus Mrs Hudson is right Sherlock does look bloody awful

• "...that's me by the way, hello": HE'S SO PROUD AND IT'S SO SWEET

• "IT WAS MY HUSBAND'S CARTEL, I was just typing"

• The fact he tells him to be calm: Sherlock KNOWS that he needs to calm John down to get this sorted out

• Mary, stop being sarcy with him he's tryna sort it out

• "Because you won't love me when you've finished, and I don't want to see that happen": I mean she's not my favourite but I still feel so sorry for her

• "Look at you two: you should've got married": Sherlock: OH BABY NOT MY GAY ASS

• See, Sherlock SAYS that the reason Mary didn't kill him was because John would be part of the murder investigation, but I think it's because she's already seen what Sherlock's death would do to John: she's seen him crying at the grave, seen him drunk and screaming for Sherlock to come back, seen him unable to even walk past St Barts without seeing Sherlock hitting the ground over and over and over again, and she knows she can't do that to him again

• Paramedics: yo we here

• "She shot you" "ehhhhh mixed messages"

• "The problems are your past are your business. The problems of your future are my privilege": GET YOURSELF A MAN LIKE JOHN WATSON

• "You can mow the sodding lawn from now on": the fact John uses his wife's secret identity to get out of chores is such a mood XD

• When your mother catches you smoking: Mycroft: nope wasn't me Sherlock: *immediately blames his brother*

• "Your loss would break my heart" "what the HELL am I supposed to say to that": brotherly feeeeeeeeeeeels

• "Go and have some more": AWWW YOU LOVE HIM REALLY

• Dr Watson voice is baaaack

• Awwww at least he checks they're all still breathing XD

• "You can imagine the Christmas dinners".... GUYS THE OMENS CAME TRUE

• I love the idea that Sherlock just waltzed into Angelo's like "yo can I have a table", and Angelo DIDN'T EVEN QUESTION what he was wearing or the fact he was hooked up to morphine, just said "yoooo, I got your table sorted" and brought him food XD

• The constant flashbacks in this episode are so effective, cos they really bloody fit in

• "My brother": *literally delivers a drugged Mycroft all wrapped up with a little bow on top* "WELL I DIDN'T LIE"

• "Oh yeah we could be imprisoned for high treason btw": Sherlock stop you idiot

• "But it's Christmas!"

• "WHY WOULD I BRING MY GUN!?!!?!?!" "Coat pocket?" "YES"

• "But look how you care about John Watson": even MAGNUSSEN knows guys

• Awwwww Mycroft's pressure point is Sherlock, that's kinda sweet

• You've gotta admit Magnussen's logic is pretty sound

• "I enjoy it": yeah but you're a sadistic maniac, mate, you don't enjoy normal things

• He must have half the fucking Eden Project in his house XD

• Ooooo THE VAULTS ARE A MIND PALACE: big reveaaaaaaaaaal

• Sherlock's little look down: it's as if he's chastising himself, telling himself he should have know

• "I don't understand" "You should put that on a t-shirt": JOHN WATSON T-SHIRT SAGA #2, PART 1

• "Sherlock do we have a plan?" *silence*

• "I still don't understand" "And there's the back of the t-shirt": JOHN WATSON T-SHIRT SAGA #2, PART 2

• When Magnussen makes John let him flick his face: Sherlock can't even WATCH. He's just standing there, staring at the floor, still questioning why he didn't see it

• I mean I'm sorry but the murderous little glint in Sherlock's eyes when Magnussen is flicking John: he knows there's nothing he can do, but then he also knows what he's about to do. And he knows that John is going to hate it, but it's the only way to keep Mary safe

• THE LOVING LOOK AT JOHN JESUS CHRIST I CAN'T

• "MERRY CHRISTMAS" *bang*: JESUS SHERLOCK NO

• Mycroft sounds so panicked, like "no please don't shoot him"

• "Tell her she's safe now": THEN. That was the moment John realised. The moment he realised who he was really in love with

• All Mycroft can see is his crying, upset and scared little brother AND I CAN'T

• "You know what happened to the other one": OOOOOOO

• "There is no prison where we can incarcerate Sherlock without him causing a riot on a daily basis": dis be true guys

• SHERLOCK MAKES MARY LOOK AFTER JOHN I CAAAAAAN'T

• The fact that all acceptingly walk away, like they know what Sherlock is gonna try to do

• "The game is never over, John. There are just new players": SHERL STOP

• "6 months, my brother estimates. He's never wrong": he KNOWS he's gonna die

• The fact he can't even tell John just shows something, doesn't it

• "John there's something I need to say. Something I've always meant to say but never have. Since it's unlikely that we'll ever meet again, I might as well say it now": we all wanted it. We all wanted him to say it. Even JOHN had the hopeful little look in his eyes....

• "Sherlock is actually a girl's name": BUT HE CHICKENS OUT AT THE LAST SECOND. You can just see the disappointment and upset in his face, even on the plane, knowing that he may not see John again and John still doesn't know

• "Did you miss me?": MORIARTY YES WE STAN A QUEEN

• "You're needed": the lil panic cos he knows his OD isn't gonna work

• "Who needs me" "....England": yeah, Scotland, Wales and Northern Ireland are screwed XD

[bumblesimagines]

Rewatching New Moon

Some of the thoughts I had while watching the movie

Edward is an Edgelord oml

"Don't do anything reckless" ha ha ha

"I won't come back" stop fucking lying my guy

Why are they murmuring? I can barely hear them

Ed she's having like an anxiety attack you can't just leave her in the middle of the woods-

He probably heard her yelling his name and her thoughts and he still dipped knowing the woods are fucking dangerous

what the FUCK IS THAT IS THAT SAM??

Okay it is lmao what a good boy

The soundtrack in the movies is just *chefs kiss*

The scene is amazing but she has so many lamps

Charlie is such a good dad

Bells looks so pretty holy shit

Charlie called her baby aweeee

Jessica lmao I love her rambling

Is this a fever dream? Am I having a fever dream? Bells wtf?

This whole biker thing dream with the.. Hallucinations? Is so odd i have a headache

She's both, Jessica

Is that where she got the whole inspo to jump off a cliff?

Jake is such a cute good friend but after new moon he becomes such an ass

"Age is just a number, baby" okay let's not lmao

They have such a cute friendship

"Just my boys" lmao okay

Quill... No...

"What about the part where you're his girlfriend" OOF

Embry is so cute lmao

We should've had a friendship between Quill, Bell, Jake, and Embry.

Her dreams are so odd. She just... Screams

I forgot Charlie and Billy were 100% Team Jacob

"Sam and his cult" you about to join that club my guy

Oh no cliffdiving

Embry shifted before Jake? I forgot lmao

The fuck was that clip of Sam cliffdiving??

He took his shirt off to flex on these hoes

Jake and blondie lmao

Bell wtf are you wearing

he tried to hOLD HER HAND lmao

Can they stop murmuring?

Jake stop lmao get your sixteen year old ass in the backseat babes

Poor... Mike? Ned? Nate? I forgot his name but poor guy

Lmao Charlie's friend is funny

The door didn't close all the way your cars gonna get wet

Why are you yelling? Lmao

Oop

Why is he mad at her? I'm confused cuz she didn't tell him about the vamps?

She needs a friend Jake

It's not you it's me imtheonlyoneineed

You turn into a giant dog, you're fine

breAK UP?

Is steam coming off his body?? I mean... The wolves are supposed to be super hot so it would make sense lmao

What happenes to the flower field thing??

Vampy with an accent

A pet lmao

That's fair. An eye for an eye

Her hair is nice

yES WOLF BOYS

thATS HARRY???

"Can you stay in the house?" ya no

Why did she look so scared about Jake throwing pebbles at her window??

She changes her bed position thing so many times

She's a good friend obvi she would

Paul is so owo

Jared stfu

Why is Jared so happy about Bella getting her ass possibly mauled by Paul??

Their fight looks so fake lol

Cozy ass place

Emily is so pretty

Jared hates her ass lmao

Sam and Emily are the cutest

Huh? Wrong?

I'm so gay for Victoria lmao

Fake ass bird lmao

I thought Harry died cause of Leah shifting?? Not Victoria?? They really went all out and made Leah the mean girl cause of just Sam

The underwater scene is dope

Where the hell did Sam come from??

Bell you idiot

Oh it's just Alice

Alice is such a mood

Oof

Lmao everytime a vamp pops in Bell becomes so defensive and against the wolves

"swAN RESIDENCE"

Is Edward in Brazil??

But... You almost... Did the same... Okay

Alice lmao

Never drive with a Cullen noted

Lmao all those people that she's pushing and shoving

Don't fucking laugh poor girl nearly had a.. Nvm

Edward just stfu and d i e

So you admit you manipulated her? Lit

Janeeee

They should've played elevator music lmao

Aleccccc

My man's said yEET

Lmao Bella's little dance when Edward's head almost gets ripped off lmao

Souless yet he's breathing heavily lmao

Weird ass vision

Anddd he's back. What a dream...

"Sssshhut up" lmao

Awe Rosalie 💕

Stfu Ed

thEY HAVE A POOL??

Fight him Jake

"Thanks for keeping her alive while I chilled in Brazil"

Jake... Stop... Stop being a child lmao

That shift mid air was dope

"Marry me Rebecca!" "No"

Lmao anyways it was a mess.

[eisforeidolon]

Episode: Atomic Monsters

I watched this at least a week ago, but just didn't get around to rewriting my notes into a post 'til now.  I did actually find this the best episode so far, but lets be real, that's such a low bar to clear at this point it says basically nothing.

The opening sequence is really fun!  I found the whole thing genuinely enjoyable, both the action itself and that it included exactly the kind of return cameo I can actually get behind.  No retcons or resurrections that make death somehow even cheaper or ruin the original finish to the character's story!  Not even to mention that, instead of existing just for the sheer fanservice of it?  A sequence like this is actively improved by giving us a familiar face we have investment in to keep it from being all just random unfamiliar cannon fodder getting offed.

Unfortunately, this isn't the rousing endorsement it could be when we know that both expanding to a big action sequence and bringing Benny back for it were actually Jensen's ideas.  Not even to mention that the thing which really works best in the episode?  It's the dream sequence that's not actually connected to anything else and doesn't have to worry about continuity to work. This is my surprised face.

I enjoyed the exchange between Sam and Dean in the kitchen.  The meat man conversation over the bacon was rather silly, but in a fun way. I've seen some people reading things into it (it's insulting Dean doesn't know the slang, Sam is randomly vegetarian now) that I didn't really see there.  I did appreciate how Sam was weirdly jumpy and had trouble meeting Dean's eyes after the creepy alternate world dream.  I thought it worked really well for both slice-of-life and Sam’s reaction.

In terms of the Winchester's case, well, for the most part it could have been worse.  I don't honestly believe even if I hadn't been spoiled that I wouldn't have immediately suspected the parents from their introductory exchange about how Billy playing in the big game was more important than a cheerleader's death.  I think it was supposed to be a retroactive subtle clue, but it was more of a clue-by-four.  So the “mystery” of tracking down the monster was pretty lost on me.  I did like that the one girl having braces was a clue!  But I also thought the scene with her rehearsing her speech on a live mic in an empty auditorium was weird and contrived.  I straight out cannot forgive that a girl was literally abducted from the school campus and NOBODY checked the security footage near her car fucking IMMEDIATELY well before Sam & Dean.  C'mon.  Then, of course, a couple random middle-aged suburbanite humans get the drop on Sam and Dean, because Dabbernatural really just loves to make them incompetent so plots happen.

Then the big reveal and blah blah blah, kid accidentally ate his girlfriend.  WHAT WERE WE SUPPOSED TO DO???  Um, maybe try not being scumbags?  Idiotic scumbags at that, abducting a second girl from their son's own school instead of somebody that wouldn't be missed or even, hey, maybe encouraging him to try harder not to eat people.  Don't try to sell me on this pseudo hallmark 'but they just love him so much' bullshit.  At least the kid has more self-awareness and conscience than his fuckwad parents.  

Then we get to the infuriating character assassination part of the programme.  Having Sam and Dean say that they'd do the same thing as the dad for Jack their “son”?  Fuck you very much, show.  I could maybe, maybe, see Sam or Dean kidnapping and draining the life out of an innocent to save the other at their most desperate worst.  Though I think the only time they even really get close to that kind of an actively, knowingly evil choice is with Doc Benton.  Not only do I not buy for a second that they would do that for the totally-really-their-actual-child-for-reasons albatross Dabbernatural has shoehorned into their lives?  Struggling to do the right thing even when it hurts used to actually mean something – it was always a very important qualifier that while Sam or Dean might make that choice, the other would not let them.  So having them both agree this kind of straight up villainy would be a-okay for oh-so-totally-loveable-no-really-woobie-blob Jack ...

Like carelessly assassinating every human in the BMoL headquarters, it fundamentally fails to understand what it is that keeps Sam and Dean from being the monsters.  Hint: it's not just that the show centers around them.  “We do the ugly thing so that people can live happy” - these moronic hacks seem to be actually trying to parallel Sam and Dean saving innocent victims and the world to human monsters that were going to selfishly help their son eat his way through the entire goddamn cheerleading squad.  Am I getting this wrong somehow?  Is there some other, less appalling, reading here that I'm missing? This whole scene honestly made me nauseous.

They talkity-talk on for a while longer, but it's really not much better.  Sam declaring that God was totally done with them was the writers putting those words in his mouth based on nothing.  At it’s very best, it was Sam’s bad habit of convincing himself conclusions he’s come to are true because he wants them to be.  So them both just deciding to believe it's true after Chuck has admitted to orchestrating their entire lives … I'm not sure if we should conclude the Winchesters have brain damage or if that's just the writers.  Especially when the underlying reason for it is nothing more compelling than , “Watch the Winchesters see-saw on the angst fulcrum completely at random!  Yay!”  If this was actually well written, there would be some precipitating reason for Sam to suddenly be the one being all fatalistic while Dean is accepting.  Instead, the writers  just slap some coin-flipped angst angst angst on the page and meander on in a supposedly forward direction.

So then there's the other half of the episode, the Becky storyline. Am I the only one a little disturbed that Becky's first reaction to seeing Chuck was to look scared and try to run away?  Like, they're exes and all, sure, but she doesn't know any of the god stuff yet – I think the only thing she even says about their breakup is that Chuck dumped her.  Is that reaction supposed to be yet another bit of “new canon” showing how Chuck was just that terrible all along? But then she does let him in, so maybe we're just supposed to take it as Becky still having a tendency towards dramatics?  I honestly don't know, but it was weird to me.  

I do genuinely love that they had Becky go to therapy and realize just how absolutely fucked up what she'd done was and ultimately sort herself out to become someone who seems to be a well-balanced adult. A well balanced adult that didn't have to give up being a fan for that!  Seriously, kudos to the writers for this, because 7.08 is such a loathsome episode that otherwise ruins Becky as a character.   Though I do have to nitpick a bit – while I get that they wanted to put SPN merch in Becky's home as a callout to her still being a superfan?   In the show's universe, Chuck's books were never that popular, so I'm having some suspension of disbelief issues that there would be Funkos for them.  We could pretend they were customs, but she's got at least one Impala, so even that doesn't quite work.  I'm not entirely sure who “people only want them sitting around doing laundry anyway” is a dig at, but I'm giving it the side eye.  

I also am not entirely sure what to make of Chuck's whole no one needs me I kinda hate me I'm all lost and don't know what to doooooo shtick.  Is this a game he's playing?  Is he really that wishy-washy? Did some of Dabb's sad internal monologue as showrunner somehow end up in a script by accident?  

He goes on like that and laments he's lost the Winchester's trust and had words with them or whatever, and then he zaps Becky and her family away at the end.  Like, if he cared enough about Becky to care about her opinion, why does he turn on her, too, just like that?  I guess we're supposed to see it as him having found his mojo in her space and vanishing her because taking over her space that's working for him currently is his latest whim.  I suppose they're intending to show Chuck as just being that capricious and flighty, but I don't know that it works for me.  The way they've been writing him he's acting so randomly and impulsively that it's kind of unbelievable he can even sit still at a keyboard long enough to write another Sam and Dean installment.  Again, I definitely find it unbelievable that the Chuck they're giving us now would be capable of playing the long game that he would have had to for him to be actively behind everything.  Until he suddenly got impatient and lazy and popped up in the cemetery at the end of the last finale ... for reasons … and is now just … like that … because.

Not to mention that his powers are, big shock, just as arbitrary as everyone else's in the current show.  He can't actually see what is happening to Sam and Dean because of the bullet sapping his power or whatever, but we're supposed to be worried about the ominous ending he's writing for them because … he's got those god powers to make it happen, I guess?  Uh...

I will grant that the ominous bobbing of Sam and Dean Funkos' heads to Chuck's furious typing was a wonderfully foreboding shot to end on.