#bonus points if anyone can tell me what the very end part was inspired by
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wonryllis · 8 months ago
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do you have any tips / tricks for boosting or growing a tumblr account?
YES I DO! these are some tips specifically targeted to help grow an account quickly. if anyone has any other tips please feel free to add!
( 01 ) CONSISTENCY: with any blog to grow you gotta continuously post content to attract people. it gives them reason to follow to get updates regarding your latest works.
( 02 ) KNOW YOUR AUDIENCE: this might not be what everyone wants to do on their blog but if your aim is to grow quick then, it is best to know what your target audience loves to consume and work on providing them exactly that. for example in most of the fandom blr, majority of readers prefer fluff over angst, so to grow faster you can put out more fluff content and hold back on angst. or another example is happy endings over sad endings.
( 03 ) PROVIDE MORE ACCORDING TO RESPONSE: after you have a couple of works posted, you can go through it's stats to see how well it's doing with the readers and proceed to put out similar works in future and more for any specific members whose content does best.
( 04 ) ACCEPT REQUESTS: taking requests and actually doing them does help you grow but not taking requests does not mean you will not be able to grow quick. these do help but if you already as performing well in regards to the above mentioned points you might not necessarily need to do requests.
( 05 ) BE NICE AND HUMBLE: kindness goes a long way, trust me. and no i do not intend to tell you to pretend, please always remember not to let things get to your head, whether it be "huge number of followers" or "hate" there will always be people who will not prefer your way and in times like these it is best to be nice and move on.
( 06 ) IMP, LUCK: trust me, luck plays a hugeeeeee hugeee huge! part in growth. you may do all the above points diligently yet still not be able to grow quickly. and you can never know when that luck would strike. you just gotta keep trying.
( 07 ) LASTLY, KEEP TRYING DON'T GIVE UP: it may happen at first your account's growth is slow, but who knows if that luck is waiting to strike you at the right time. so don't give up and keep trying and trying. trying will leave you hanging for if not quick you'll still grow!
BONUS, STRIVE TO IMPROVE: anything your blog is about always try your best to get better and better with time! take inspiration from others to find your own charm and spark and learn from them.
VERY VERY VERY IMPORTANT, NEVER COPY ANYONE TO GET THAT SHORTCUT FAME!
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junkshop-disco · 2 years ago
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For that writers thing, can you tell us 13, 18, 57 and 68? Thank you!
I just answered 13 in way too much detail here but also forgot to mention that my top three playlist-able songs for fic writing purposes of all time, and across all fandoms, are:
The Promise, originally by When In Rome but I also really like this version by Samia. Fade into You, originally by Mazzy Star but I also love this version by Blonde Maze. And Just Like Honey, originally by the Jesus and Mary Chain but also this version by Headless Heroes and this version by Annie.
Like if you want to sum up what one of my fics is about, it's all right there. We've got friends to lovers, dawning realisation, and a sort of baffled by feelings thing. That's it. That's the fic lol. This is a tangent, but Terry Hall died recently and that reminded me what a huge influence he was on me as a writer. His lyrics just have a way of cutting to the chase of romance and being so open about the hopeful/hopelessness dichotomy of falling in love. Some of my fave lyrics are Sense 'I'm standing high on tiptoes looking over fences, waiting for somebody like you to kiss me senseless.' Thinking of You 'Who knows, maybe tomorrow, we can share each other's sorrow, and compare our graveside manner as we wave our lonely banners.' And Forever J 'Uncertain, coy, and hard to please, she kisses me through gritted teeth, but when I'm weak, she whispers dreams.' Pretty much everything I want to do in fic is built on my love of Terry Hall's words.
18. Do you enjoy research?  Which fic of yours required the most research?
I do now, although it wasn't always so. A Matter of Time is probably the most research I've ever done, because it's set in 1927 and heavily features clockmaking and clock repair as a plot. So I gave myself a crash course in the history of clocks, the different type of clocks available at the time, how to take them apart, and how to repair them. I like to think it enriched the fic not to fudge the details. All the clocks in it are real, apart from the one right at the end, which is a sort of amalgam of two different clocks because I couldn't find one single clock that was whimsical enough and tricky enough to repair for what I wanted it to do in the narrative. I also did a lot of research for general historical accuracy, including at one point looking up whether drainpipes existed in 1927 for a one line, throwaway joke.
57. How conscious are you about including symbolism or foreshadowing in your fics?
It depends on the fic tbh. I've written a few fics like Learning to Speak the Language of Flowers where the symbolism is very much key to the fic itself (literally all the plants and flowers mentioned in the fic Mean Something) and in my current Fate fic, there's a bit of foreshadowing because it's just that sort of fic. There's a lot of runes chat and fortune telling with cards plays a part in it, so there's a little dusting of foreshadowing because it sits well thematically I think. Mostly I do that sort of thing for myself, though, and if anyone else picks up on it it's a bonus. I think a fic should be readable and enjoyable without it.
68. Are there any fics that influenced you to write the way you do?
So many. Two of my all time faves are Derryere's RPF of Doom (which is no longer available) and Minor Hue's The Good Times Are Killing Me (which you need an LJ to view but that link is to podfic of it). They both have lines I think about all the time and a real sense of rawness to them, they capture what desire and confusion and heartbreak feels like in a way that's genuine and fresh. I'm also a huge fan of Demonology and the Tri-Phasic Model of Trauma: An Integrative Approach by Nmn, which is genuinely one of the best things I've ever read. It is quietly devastating in a way you see coming from the first chapter, and yet are still unprepared for when what you knew was going to happen happens. Idk if they influenced me so much as inspired me. Reading them was like... yes, this is what I'm trying to do, this is the bar to aim for.
Thank you for playing 💛
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flysafepapi · 3 years ago
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the sin factor 13/?
masterlist
Warnings: Referenced child abuse, general sense of self loathing, not much else that I’d need to tag.
Summary: It’s in the eyes, too, the same ambition and clawing desperation to be more, get more, hidden behind a carefully blank stare. He also knows that Duke has something Tommy never had although it’s more likely that it’s the other way around, because Tommy has lines that he won’t cross for reasons that are his own. Duke has no such reservations.
tagging: @zablife​​​​​​​ @the-makingsofgreatness​​​ @peakyrogers​​​​​​​ @hb-writes​​​​​​ @caelys​​​​ (let me know if you want to be added on or taken off)
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“Stop staring at me.”
“Are we ever going to talk about it?”
Duke knows what Isiah means. It had been a mistake to change in front of him, to turn his back. He’s been so careful so far to never let them be seen, usually by turning the light off, or keeping the shirts on after they’ve been unbuttoned. He knew it was going to come up sooner or later. He just wishes it was later. 
“About what?”
“I never knew you had a tattoo.”
Tattoo is a poor word for the design on the back of his shoulder. It wasn’t much more than an ugly design seared into him, a stylised letter D surrounded by loops and swirls, darker than the rest of his skin from the coal dust that had been rubbed into the open wounds before they healed, and if he thought the pain from the red-hot metal was bad, it was nothing compared to the burn of the dust settling into the cuts. It’s designed to mark him as property. 
“What’s it meant to be?”
“Ownership.”
“What do you mean?”
Isiah is too observant for his own good, sometimes, and even in the dark he can tell Duke’s gone closed off again, pulling back and building those walls right back up to keep himself safe. He hates it when it happens, and normally he would’ve backed off and let the question go, but he needs to know. 
“Duke.”
“His name was Durham. Far worse a monster than I’ve ever been or will be. He was married, you see, but I’m guessing it was just for appearances, because from what I remember his tastes were for little boys. Not one of us was over the age of 14. He was a well-known part of the congregation at the church my mother liked to go to.”
He’s thankful that the lights are off, that the room is so dark that he can’t see a thing. If he was able to see the look on Isiah’s face while he talked, he never would’ve been able to say any of this. It’s tempting to stop and roll over, pretend to be asleep, when Isiah makes a noise in the back of his throat. Disgust, maybe, and the fact that he can’t be sure if it’s disgust for him or for the men that did that to him cuts like a knife. 
“Did he-“
“No. Not while she was alive, but looking back on it, I know the intent was there. It didn’t happen until later, a year or two after she died. I had just turned 12. Until then, I’d managed to survive by stealing what I could, but I hadn’t eaten in over a week. It was a gamble to try the church, but I was desperate, I was starving. I was naive to think there was ever any help for me there.”
Duke speaks like he’s reciting the life story of someone else, matter of fact and emotionless, but Isiah’s more attuned to him than anyone else ever has been. While he talks, Isiah can hear the tone underneath, and it’s young and hurt and so sad it breaks his heart. 
“I’ve never told anyone.”
“You can tell me.”
He does what he’s always done when things get too difficult and turns the question around, makes it into an attack.
“Why are you so interested? What do you want to hear? That everything was fine after I lost the only family I had, or thought I had?”
“That’s not-“
“Or do you want to hear what it was really like? That I would scream and no one ever came to rescue me? I had to do that myself. Do you want to hear about all the things they did to me? The knives and the belts, even a whip or two if they were feeling particularly cruel that day? Want to know all about how they’d turn sweet and consoling after they were done, acting like they didn’t mean to do it, it was an accident, don’t I know they’d never hurt me if I wasn’t so bad?”
The sudden light, from the little lamp on the table beside the bed, makes him roll over and close his eyes. He’s said too much, revealed things he never should’ve. 
“Just leave it alone.”
“Hey. I don’t care. Well, I care, of course I do. I want to find everyone who ever took advantage of you and make them pay for what they did. But it doesn’t change anything. You’re still-“
“Not good enough. I've got to go.” 
He slips out the door and disappears before Isiah can stop him.
~~~
“What are you doing here?”
“Not happy to see me? That almost hurts, dad.”
He can see the flinch that word elicits, and he might’ve laughed if it didn’t sting. Not for the first time, he wonders how things might’ve gone if all of this happened years ago. If he’d grown up with these people and not on the streets, being taking advantage of for being a starving kid, would that have changed anything? 
“You shouldn’t be here. I don’t-”
“Afraid you’re next on the list?”
“So you admit there’s a list.”
“There’s always a list. Who’s on yours?”
The ring Jeremiah had given him is still in pocket and he can feel it like it weighs as much as an anchor, burning hot like the brand that gave him the mark on the back of his shoulder. In this case, it’s a much more pleasant type of burn.
“Not going to tell me? I can understand that. I guess both of us have trouble letting people in. Such a shame they managed to get past our defences anyway, right? Leaves us weak. Yeah, I’ve heard all about your little spy, and what she did. I get it. Guess that’s just another thing we have in common.”
That makes his father flinch more than calling him ‘dad’ had. 
“I’m nothing like you.”
Duke ignores the chair in the small caravan and steps over to the small table with the pictures on the surface, tapping his fingers on the edge of the wood as he looks at them. 
“I’ve been told he was a good man, in his own way. I wish I could’ve met him.” Esme had told him, on the long ride here, about the man that was once her husband. At the time, he hadn’t responded much, but he remembered every word. “Everyone blames you for getting him killed, because they don’t understand that all the scheming in the world can’t save anyone if they won’t do anything to save themselves. He stayed behind, when you told him it was dangerous, didn’t he?”
“He did. That doesn’t make them blame me any less.”
“They’ll always blame us, it doesn’t matter whether you managed to save him or not. Don’t save him, they blame you for getting him killed. Save him, they’ll blame you for not trusting him enough to protect himself. Miss the death of your daughter by trying to break a curse, they’ll blame you for not being there. Stay with her while it happens, they’ll blame you for not doing everything you could to save her.”
“Don’t talk about her.”
“Burns, doesn’t it? Knowing you could give them the moon and they’d still paint you as the devil? Why are you still trying? It’s much more fun to give them what they want and become what they all believe you are.”
He’s heard Isiah talk about how similar their eyes are, and he can’t disagree when he turns around and looks at his father, who looks back at him with nothing on his face but the burning anger in his eyes. 
“Lizzie hasn’t been seen for over a week. Esme’s people said she didn’t even make it back?”
“Really? That’s not good. It’s a dangerous world out there, anything could’ve happened to them.”
“What did you do to them?”
“What makes you think I did anything?”
He doesn’t make it two steps before the click of the gun echoes through the small room.
“Don’t move. Stay where you are, I don’t want you close enough to slit my throat.”
“Oh, Tommy,” Duke says, sliding one hand into his pocket and feeling the familiar edges of the ring, turning it around in his fingers while he pretends not to notice the flicker of confusion using his father’s name creates, “If you think it’s going to go that quick for you when it’s your turn, you’re in for a rude and painful awakening.” He takes another step forward, closer to the makeshift bed in the corner where the other man sits. 
“I said don’t move. One more step, and you’ll be dead.”
“Don’t you know, dad? I’m already dead.” He takes another step.
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spaghettificationandpretzels · 3 years ago
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The Reaper and the Death Angel Part 12
The fire might be a flicker now.
Part 11
Series Masterlist
Contains: The use of ASL (deaf people are a part of everyday life and should be included in our fic like anyone else.) Talk of past bullying from both adults and other children. This was deeply cathartic, I may have cried while writing it. Has plot point from s1ep2.
A huge, enormous thanks to @carni-val for the inspiration for a part of this fic.
2.7K Words
Comment if you want to be tagged
Jax helps out on a tour.
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"Ok Teller, what's your bet this time?" You were sitting at the picnic benches at the Clubhouse, waiting for your Brother to come back from a supply run when Jax walked up to you with that cocky look on his face.
"Am I that transparent?" You nodded.
"Yes you are, you're also insufferable." He laughed.
"Since you seem to know so much about guns, I'd like to posit a challenge. I'll set up the targets this time, and if you hit everyone, I'll spend my day off doing whatever you want me to." This felt like a trap but you went with it.
"Feel bad for cheating the last time Jackson?" He smiled, all teeth and allure but he didn't respond. You reach your hand out to shake his, when he accepted, you made sure to squeeze just hard enough for him to know you weren't playing.
"If I don't, win that is, what do you get out of it?" He leaned over you, and whispered in your ear, "The same thing."
He didn't take long, it was far easier than what you did for his turn.
You pulled your gun from it's hidden place and stood ready to take the shots.
Breath in
Breath out
Breath in
Squeeze
The targets fell in a matter of seconds, each one being hit dead centre. You put your gun back in its holster and turned to Jax.
"Your play Mr Teller." He shot you another smile, this one with just a hint of predator.
"I know your day off is a Wednesday, and I have a 'boys in STEM' tour coming in; you will be my guest speaker. As a bonus, you get to go on the tour as well. Come dressed in your T-M Uniform and be ready to answer lots of questions about Motorbikes.
He spread his hand in acceptance. "You won fair and square, I can't say no to that."
Jax had stopped by to see Abel before coming to the Museum to hold up his end of your bet. He greeted Travis at the door, who gave him the same curt nod and waved him inside. He saw you waiting at your office for the kids to arrive, the theme of your scrubs today was construction tools, and his eyes were drawn to the wrench along your thigh. When you saw him, you waved happily and he could barely stop himself from running over to you.
"You came!" You wrapped him and a firm hug and he pulled back to look into your face.
"Of course I came, I'm a man of my word." You shook your head at him, he could almost feel the light coming off you. This was very different from the reserved way you usually acted when lots of people were around, he was just about to ask you why when the kids came in.
"Hello everyone, I'm Dr l/n but you can call me y/n. This is Jackson who is our extraordinary guess speaker today, he is a super smart expert in Motorcycles." Jax felt like he was standing on the top of Mount Everest.
He watched your hands with rapt attention, he knew you and your Brother spoke ALS but he never appreciated how expressive it was until now.
"I can't wait to show you all the fun stuff we have here. Now, there's no such thing as a stupid question, even if it has nothing to do with why you're here, I want you to ask it." You turned your head towards him.
"That includes you, Jackson." He couldn't help but smile, he felt like the smartest person in the world.
As you walked through the exhibits, you got more and more animated, he watched the children respond in kind, their little bodies moving more and more as you spoke.
You pointed to one of the first Harleys ever made "Now this is where Jackson comes in, can you tell the class all about this bike?" You looked at him with so much faith he felt as if his heart was going to burst.
"Well, this is a Harley-Davidson Model 1, it was built in 1903 and sold for $200 which in those days was a lot of money." You waved your hand slightly for him to continue.
"There were only 38 made and it closer to an electric bike than it is to the Motorcycles we ride now." Almost all the hands in the class shot up in the air, and you gave him such a genuine smile that he felt butterflies in his intestines. You pointed out the boy who was reaching his hand up as high as he could and he shot out his question in only the way an excited child could.
"Did it go fast?" Suddenly he knew why you were so happy, he had long lost his childish curiosity but being around you and the class bought it screaming back.
"Not really, it only got up to 40mph which is no where near how fast they go now." The little boy's eye went wide, Jax could almost hear his thoughts, they were the same ones he had when he was little, pouring over his Father's old stuff.
The rest of the day went like that, and he never wanted to leave. He had the same feeling in his chest as he did when he first saw you standing there on your front lawn. That you were a siren pulling him into the rolling ocean and he was a sailor happy to drown himself to hear another second of your voice.
The boys had left exhausted and happy, you were sitting together in the sitting area above the lab, drinking coffee and talking about the day.
"I have a 'girls in STEM' class coming at the same time next week. It's the same program. I'd love it if you could come, the kids today certainly loved you." Jax couldn't have said yes soon enough.
"Where this person when you're with us, you're so quiet most of the time." He watched your face fall, it made him strangely angry.
"It's a long story, I don't want to take up any more of your time." He wasn't going to have that, he had seen you underneath all your proper shell, and he wouldn't watch you go back in it.
"Nope, you're not going to do that. I don't want you to hide from me, I like it when you let me see you." You looked at him with a deep sadness.
"I used to be like this all the time, when I was a kid. But other kids are mean, so are adults." You pressed your lip together in thought.
"Think of it this way. We all have these jars inside our chests, they contain our curiosity, and in these jars, is that bioluminescent algae that makes the beaches glow that stunning blue. When our curiosity is fostered and we're made to feel like our thoughts matter, this jar gets bigger, which means we can fit even more in it." Jax could see your point as clear as day.
"Movement makes the algae glow, and when people listen to us, when they make us feel like we're smart, it's like gentle waves on the beach, and it's like a crashing storm when we're really passionate about something. If someone is cruel to us, makes us feel stupid or like we don't matter, it's not like the ocean is entirely calm, it's like someone uncapped the jar and poured everything out." Jax could hear the breaking in your voice.
"My jar was emptied a lot as a little girl, and like any child, my first response was to shake it harder, hoping someone acknowledged my light. After a while, I learned to stop speaking, I learned that no one really cared about what I had to give." He understood you on such a human level.
I promise to never dim you.
"I never want anyone to feel the way I've been made to feel. Every kid should know that jar inside them is the most precious thing they own. They should never feel the need to stifle themselves because other people don't get them." You went to keep going but Jax couldn't stop himself from cutting in.
"I like watching you glow, it's the most beautiful thing I've seen. Far more beautiful than a sunset or Model 1 Harley Davidson." He had no idea why he was saying it, it's like the logical part of his brain was being drowned by something far more straightforward.
He loved you
"Oh Jackson, you're so noble it's a little disgusting." He walked over to you and pulled you into a hug.
"I'll be back next week, there's no way I'd miss it."
****
You were waiting for Jax to arrive at the hospital, you had spent the night pouring over neonatal care textbooks and scientific papers. You finished work early to go in and talk to the doctor on shift and ask about what you had planned. They agreed wholeheartedly and were happy to help.
Jax showed up at the normal time and greeted you with a side hug.
"I have a surprise for you." He tilted his head.
"What?" You shot up out of the chair, bearly able to contain your smile and signalled a nurse over. You waved Jax over to the sink and gestured to him to take his rings off.
"This lovely lady will show you how to wash your hands and then, you'll get to touch your Son." Jax looked at you wide-eyed and reached for the soap.
"You can't hold him just yet, but you get to hold his tiny hand." You could see his eyes getting wet so you put a kind hand on his shoulder. "I'll give you some privacy." He reached out like a closing bear trap around your upper arm.
"Please stay, I don't want you to leave." You nodded softly. Jax watched the nurse carefully, it probably took him five minutes to finally be confident that his hands were clean.
The nurse moved some things, opened a small door and gestured for Jax to put in hand in. He did so with a slowness that didn't seem possible. He rested one of his huge fingers on Abel's leg and then moved it up to stroke his face, he finished by putting just his fingertip in Abel's open hand.
"Thank you y/n, I......." You put a hand on his shoulder.
"It's nothing. Plus, I didn't do it for you, kids need physical touch." That seemed to make him even more overwhelmed.
He plopped onto your side and rested his head on your body while he held his Son. He was just about to say something when Gemma came running it. She looked around then at Abel, to Jax and then at you.
"Did you do this?" You almost got a yes out before she pulled you into a hug.
"You can go next, but think you'll be waiting a while." She gave you a strange look, like she was trying to see your soul.
"You have no idea how grateful we are for all you've done for this family." You shook your head and smiled.
"There's no thanks necessary. As much as I'd like to stay, it's getting a bit crowded here so I'm going to have to have a wander around the hall, there's usually a kid or two who notice my work clothes and want to talk about dinosaurs." Jax laughed, before you left, he grabbed your hand and pulled you towards him.
"Thank you."
Once you were gone, Gemma pulled up a chair and sat down next to Jax. It looked like he was in for a lecture, although you had no idea what about.
****
"You're very obvious Jackson." Jax furrowed his brow in confusion and Gemma shook her head.
"I can see your heart leap out of your chest every time you see her, I'm surprised she hasn't picked up on it." Jax brushed the back of his finger over Abel's cheek.
"She's just being nice Mum, she's like that with everyone." Gemma gave him the disapproving Mother look.
"Yeah and she lets everyone touch her as much as you do, she doesn't even hug Sam as much as she hugs you." Jax had sudden flashes of all the times you dodged a hug and shrunk away when someone came too close to you.
Oh shit.
****
Jax took your advice to heart "You need to let Darby know you know without telling him outright, I'm sure you can think of something."
He was surprised at how accepting Clay was of his idea, now he just had to get his hands on some bodies. He went with Sam, Chibs and the prospect to go and see Skeeter, the man was a sleaze but he was helpful so they put up with it.
"We need two bodies by tonight." Jax tapped the envelope of cash on his chest. "I'm sure you took a beating at goldern gate this weekend." Skeeter shook his head.
"Nah man, I stopped the ponies, I stopped it all. Gambler anonymous three months now." Jax looked surprised.
"You're kidding, you don't want to money?" Skeeter continued for a little bit before turning to Sam.
"There's something you might be able to get for me?" Jax was relieved.
"What's that?" Skeeter smiled and nodded his head at Sam.
"Your sister." They all exchanged a look and Jax squared up about to hit the man.
"I went to one of her lectures and she said she gives private tours of the Museum for people she likes. I want to go on one, that's it." Jax bristled but agreed anyway, now he would just have to get you to say yes.
****
Jax had asked to you come to the Clubhouse during your lunch break, but he didn't tell you why, just that he needed a favour. You checked the garage first and when he wasn't there, Juice directed you to the dorm.
Knock knock
Jax opens the door without his shirt on, leaning across the frame to enter your space.
"Oh sorry Jackson, I let you get dressed." He waved his hand and pulled away so you could come in. You looked around his room, it was a mess and it stunk like a terrible conglomeration of body fluids. You decided not to say anything about it. He gestured for you to sit, which you did, be it a little worried about what you were sitting on.
"I need you to do a favour for the Club y/n?." You pursed your lips in thought.
"Ok, what is it?" He reached out and put a hand over yours.
"You know Skeeter right?" You nodded.
"Yeah, of course I do. He's a bit of a creep." You could tell Jax was planning something.
"Well he needs to do to a favour for the Club, and all he wants in return is a tour from you." Jax ran his hand up your arm, you weren't going to let his bullshit go unpunished.
You stood up and pulled him up with you, coming in close to run a hand over his chest.
"What's in it for me?" He chuckled
"What do you think?" Oh the arrogance.
You leaned in and pressed a kiss to the side of his neck and then ran your hands down his body.
"Oh boy." It didn't last long, he fell a pull and then you were detaching your lips for his skin and walking away. He was left feeling like he was naked in the artic.
"I'll do it, on one condition. You find out what I've just taken from you." He looked around then down at his person, his knife was not in its holster. He looked over at you and you held it up by the handle before putting it on the desk.
"If you ever insult my intellect again, there will be hell to pay. Do you understand?" He nodded aggressively and you smiled over your shoulder at him, before you left you spoke one last time.
"Your play Mr Teller."
Part 13
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kaeyasaki · 4 years ago
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đŸ“č — :; “face-to-face” GQ interview
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-> inspired by the “face-to-face, A$AP rocky answers 18 from rihanna | GQ interview”, except i make the questions a little more personal because i don’t think anyone cares what gojo’s ‘fav curse word is’
-> ft :; gojo satoru
-> interview writing layout heavily inspired by @rintaroll
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y/n: hey GQ! i’m here to do face-to-face with my co worker, gojo!
gojo: coworker? is that all i am to you?
y/n: be grateful i even acknowledged you.
gojo: you wound me.
y/n: yet you’re still smiling.
gojo flashes a playful frown to the camera as y/n roll their eyes before pulling out a stack on cards.
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y/n: so first question, what’s the hardest part about working with me?
gojo: everything.
y/n: i’m serious.
gojo: and so am i, you make it hard for me to work with you because we never get anything done.
y/n: don’t make it sound like it’s my fault! we never get anything done because you get too distracted and drag me into it!
gojo: maybe you should discipline me more...
he teases and sends you a wink to which you dismiss quickly.
y/n: you’re a grown man, you shouldn’t need me to discipline you.
gojo: what if i want you to?
y/n: would you just answer the question seriously or i’ll really start to think you don’t think we work well together!
gojo: okay, i was kidding... you’re actually a pretty good teammate when we’re sent on missions together, i have fun with you... maybe a little too much fun...
y/n: don’t give them the wrong idea we’re nothing like that!
you cringe at him as he laughs before the camera cuts moving onto the next question
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y/n: okay, second question, answer seriously from now on, got it?
gojo: anything for you~
y/n: you disgust me... anyway, how well would you say you take care of yourself?
gojo: you mean like... self care wise?
y/n: yeah, like self care!
gojo: hmm well, i’d say i take care of myself pretty well, after all, pampered men are attractive men right?
y/n: i mean sure, i think it’s attractive when a man takes care of himself but if that mans you... maybe not so much.
gojo: you don’t mean that! you must be somewhat attracted to me.
y/n: can’t say i am no.
gojo: lying is a sin you know.
y/n: you’re totally straying away from my initial question.
you groan and face the camera and gojo tilts his head and laughs.
gojo: sorry, well, i’d say i clearly look after myself very well which should be to your liking.
y/n: you’ll never be to my liking, but it’s nice to hear you take care of yourself well and that you’re not just an annoying man, but rather an annoying but hygienic man.
gojo: you’re so horrible to m-
the camera cuts as you start laughing and gojo starts whining.
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y/n: we’re getting through these quickly now let’s keep it that way.
gojo: you know, we’d be half done by now if you stopped insulting me every chance you get.
y/n: i’m the quizzer, you’re the answerer, you answer when spoken to.
gojo turns to face the grinning camera crew behind the cameras on set.
gojo: now do you see what i have to put up with! i’m a victim i’m telling you!
camera man: no no, keep it up, you guys have nice chemistry
y/n: chemistry? not to be rude but you must’ve failed science, the only clear dialogue between us is practically conversation between an adult and child.
the camera crew laugh and gojo feigns offence before you clear your throat and look at the next card.
y/n: anyways, when was the first time you were majorly recognised as ‘famous’?
gojo: ah, a long time ago i need to think, give me a sec.
you pretend to yawn as gojo thinks about his answer before smiling at you.
gojo: my second year i think. that’s when i really started getting noticed for my talent.
y/n: practically a star since birth i see, how do you do it?
gojo laughs at your sarcasm as you grin back, evenly matched banter between the two of you flowing on set.
gojo: i’m handsome and gifted, i was made for this kinda life, it all comes naturally to me.
y/n: you know what doesn’t come naturally to you though?
gojo: hm?
y/n: that dress sense.
gojo: what’s wrong with my outfit?
y/n: bland, basic, and the way you chose itadori’s uniform was just straight up ugly!
gojo: he liked it!
y/n: the poor boy probably didn’t have the heart to express his disgust to your face.
gojo: well, until he does i’m gonna believe he likes it and my dress sense is more than up to standard.
y/n: if that’s what helps you sleep at night i guess...
the camera cuts with the two of you playfully bickering with each other, any previous speculation of hostility now gone as it’s clear for watchers to see just how your dynamic together works.
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y/n: question four! what’s the first thing you notice in a person?
gojo: in general or when analysing to an extent?
y/n: in generals fine.
gojo: hm i would say looks, but i don’t wanna look too shallow on camera.
y/n: they would’ve just recorded you saying that. don’t be shocked if you’re trending on twitter later for it.
gojo: it’s fine, as long as i’m trending who cares what it’s about.
y/n: i can see the headlines already... ‘gojo satoru, top sorcerer, favoured teacher at jujutsu high and big narcissist’
you smile smugly at the man as he laughs along with you with the camera crew from behind.
gojo: yeah yeah whatever you say, but if i had to answer honestly, i’d say what energy they give off. i don’t let it bother me too much, but i’d say i’m pretty good at judging what someone’s like based off of what energy they’re giving out.
y/n: i’m shocked, that’s a pretty good answer... for you anyway.
gojo: i try my best for you.
y/n: mhm sure, keep that attitude next time we’re working together and maybe we’ll finish jobs quicker.
gojo snickers and smiles gently at you, his direction is no longer faced towards the camera, but rather solely directed at you as you clear your throat.
y/n: yeah anyway, good answer. that might just get you uncancelled.
gojo: i haven’t even been cancelled yet don’t speak it into existence!
y/n: i’ll ‘try my best for you’
you’re both smiling softly at each other after you mock one of gojo’s previous replies, there’s no speech cut off as a comfortable silence rests for a moment as the scene cuts.
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y/n: okay, i want genuine answers only.
gojo: that’s what i’ve been giving you from the start!
you jokingly narrow your eyes at him before looking down at the next card.
y/n: well okay then, so, what was the first thing you noticed about me when we first met?
gojo: unusually bold question from you.
y/n: just shut up and answer, i was recommended to ask this.
gojo: sure, sure.
y/n: would you please just answer so we can get this over with?
gojo sighs dramatically and sits up properly and nods.
gojo: naturally, for anyone else i would say energy but for you, ah, i think it was your pretty face.
y/n: shut up, i said genuine answers only.
gojo: i am being genuine! aren’t i allowed to call you pretty?
y/n: you aren’t allowed to answer falsely, serious answers please.
gojo: you make me sound like i’m down bad, honestly, you’re very attractive to me, your energy was just a bonus, i’m serious, stop doubting yourself so much.
he smiles your way, not playfully nor forced, it’s a soft and genuine smile to calm your nerves, it’s a sign of truthfulness on his end. before you answer he clears his throat, slight hurry in his voice.
gojo: -of course, we were younger back then, since then you’ve gotten wrinkles and is that a few grey hairs i see? you also slouch-
y/n: -okay okay you can stop!
the two of you laugh as you gently kick his chair, the fact you’re being recorded and being watched by a whole camera crew totally forgotten about.
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y/n: okay, last question finally!
gojo: admit you had fun with me.
y/n: i see you everyday, today was nothing special.
gojo: you wouldn’t say we’ve bonded more over this interview?
y/n: you’re still as irritating as before this interview so no.
you grin and gojo scoffs before shuffling in his chair a little before a sly smile draws across his face.
gojo: go on then, last question.
y/n: would you sl-
gojo: go on, ask it, we’re waiting.
gojo is leaning on the palm of his hand, teasing smile playing on his lips and y/n stares at the card in disbelief.
y/n: you definitely wrote this! i would never ask this! there’s been a mistake with the cards or something
camera man: ah no, they’re all the questions that were on your form you sent in prior to the interview, these are the questions you apparently wanted to be asked. sorry, you’ll have to make do.
y/n: i’m not asking that.
gojo: come on now, don’t upset your supportive fans.
y/n: i know you wrote this, you’re so infuriating!
you glare at him but not with complete hostility, the situation slightly humorous to you despite your protests.
gojo: i mean well.
gojo shrugs as you sigh and stare at the card before speaking.
y/n: fine then have it your way. would you... would you sleep with me?
gojo: how brave! asking me on camera in the middle of an interview! how could i dare say no!
gojo is laughing along with the camera crew as you fight back a smile, refusing to admit his interference was entertaining.
y/n: at least take me out for dinner first.
gojo: now you’re asking me to take you out? you’re really bold today aren’t you!
y/n: oh shut up! i didn’t mean it like that! this is totally your fault it’s awkward now.
you’re grinning at this point not caring that your flirtatious banter with gojo is being recorded and is soon to be edited and posted for the world to see.
gojo: i mean, i’m free tomorrow if that’s good with you?
y/n: what? no, i- this wasn’t even a serious question shut up!
gojo: i’ll shut up if you let me take you out... and maybe then i’ll sleep with you after if that’s your request.
y/n: i can’t stand you!
gojo: but you do everyday, that must count for something right?
y/n: i hate you.
gojo: quite the contrary, i’m sure i’ll get you to admit that by tomorrow though.
y/n: ...i’ll be waiting on it then.
the two of you are smiling at each other, laughter dying down as you once again softly kick gojo’s chair. he pays no mind to it as a moment of fondness occurs, viewers clearly able to see the evident bond between the two of you.
y/n: okay well... that concludes our face-to-face, GQ interview, thanks for watching and putting up with him!
gojo: maybe we’ll come back to do an interview about our date after i take you out, who knows, maybe i’ll get to ask you to rate me in bed!
y/n: gross. you sound like a fifteen year old boy.
gojo: am i at least a hot one?
y/n: i refuse to catch a case.
gojo cackles as you laugh too, the camera fades out with the scene of the two of you softly smiling at each other as the interview concludes.
556 notes · View notes
robininthelabyrinth · 4 years ago
Note
LXC offhandedly says something about his relationship with NHS that would be totally innocent from *anyone* else, but sounds scandalously filthy coming from *him*. Bonus points if it's around LWJ and/or WWX and they are floored. Double bonus points if he did it on purpose for revenge over having to listen to *them* all the time. - 🩇
Petty - ao3
The first time was an accident.
No, that wasn’t right. More accurately, the first time was entirely Wei Wuxian’s fault.
(Lan Xichen sometimes thought, not very kindly, that many things were, more than Lan Wangji would necessarily admit to. He had not yet settled with himself if those were his actual thoughts or if it was merely bitterness about everything that had happened and in which Wei Wuxian had played chief role, but that was one of the things he was working on, for himself.
After all those years of being deceived, it was important for him to get to know his own mind, his own thoughts, and to be sure about them.)
“It’s good to see you out and about,” Wei Wuxian said warmly to him when they met again, as if Lan Xichen had only been confined at home with a brief illness rather than in strict seclusion for over a year.
Lan Xichen thought, perhaps, that Wei Wuxian was attempting to translate for Lan Wangji, standing beside him, practically radiating welcome and hopefulness and other such things that Lan Xichen honestly wasn’t equipped to deal with at the moment and had been purposefully ignoring. If so, it was not a very accurate translation, and unnecessary – no one knew his brother better than him.
Certainly not his brother’s long-dead lost love, who hadn’t even known.
“Indeed,” he said, not smiling, and Wei Wuxian’s own smile faded a little, as Lan Wangji’s own hope already had. “Nie Huaisang will be coming to visit me, and I plan to host him at the hanshi.”
That might also have been at Lan Wangji’s request, although only obliquely, if at all – even when he had appeared at his weakest, his most fallible and pathetic, Nie Huaisang had always been as stubborn as an ox (as stubborn as his brother), and no one could make him do anything he didn’t want to do.  This included running his own sect, no matter how much they had tried, and it also included actually listening to the people he’d just begged to solve problems for him. Lan Xichen could remember all the countless times Nie Huaisang had sobbed on his shoulder, and Jin Guangyao’s, too, until they’d given him advice, at which point he would thank them effusively and merrily go along and do whatever he felt like doing regardless. He was very good at getting his own way in the end.
As subsequent events had shown.
Lan Xichen could tell from the expression on Wei Wuxian’s face that he didn’t understand why Lan Xichen would choose to break his seclusion to host Nie Huaisang of all people, especially when he had declined all similar efforts by Lan Wangji, but he wasn’t especially inclined to explain.
If he even could.
How to explain that contemplation had shown that he had been the one to fail Nie Huaisang and not the other way around? Long before they’d ever sworn brotherhood, he had promised Nie Mingjue to watch over Nie Huaisang and aid him whole-heartedly in all his endeavors. Nie Mingjue had always worried, first and foremost, that Nie Huaisang not be lonely, knowing that his brother, born with a weak body, had long struggled with finding his place in his martially-inclined sect – everything else was secondary in Nie Mingjue’s mind, even Nie Huaisang’s personal safety. He’d always said that Nie Huaisang was a proper Nie in that fashion, that he would devote every part of him to the things he loved no matter if it meant death, and there was nothing anyone could do about it; all he’d ever wanted, instead, was for Nie Huaisang not to be alone as he did so.
Lan Xichen had sworn to be there for him.
He hadn’t been.
He’d sworn to stand beside Nie Mingjue, too, promised it in his heart and in the eyes of all the world, and he’d even meant it when he’d done so. And then, despite it all, he’d spent nearly half his life supporting and shielding his murderer – he’d broken so many promises. To the Nie, to himself. The only thing Lan Xichen could do to atone for those failures was to try to do better: to learn from what he’d done, to teach himself what he’d lacked, to make up for his deficiencies. To live up to what little remained of those promises.
And so, if Nie Huaisang wanted to see him, he would see him, even if he had seen no one else.
Wei Wuxian didn’t understand that.
Couldn’t, maybe.
Wei Wuxian was his brother-in-law, he made Lan Wangji happy, and Lan Xichen was grateful for that. He was even grateful, in a painful, agonizing sort of way, for Wei Wuxian’s help in revealing the truth about Jin Guangyao and his dark deeds. But Wei Wuxian forgot pain as soon as it happened and believed everyone else ought to be the same: they were together now, so never mind about all those years Lan Wangji spent alone and in mourning; Jin Guangyao had been a murderer, so never mind about all the good things he’d done or the good times they’d shared; Lan Xichen was out of seclusion, so clearly he’d gotten over everything that had happened.
At least for Lan Xichen, pain did not work that way.
“Well, that’s nice,” Wei Wuxian said after a while, when the silence had gone from merely familiar to actively awkward and Lan Wangji was staring at the ground, his hopes dashed to bits, even though that had not been Lan Xichen’s intent. He loved his brother very much, but he couldn’t heal himself fast enough to assuage Lan Wangji’s guilt at winning his happiness at the expense of Lan Xichen’s pain, nor did he intend to try. “I didn’t know he was coming.”
Lan Xichen did not point out that he was Sect Leader, not Lan Wangji, and that his word was final regarding who did and did not have the right to enter the Cloud Recesses at any time. It would be petty.
He was trying not to be petty. It was very hard.
“I hope to spend some quality time together with him,” Lan Xichen finally said, some meaningless filler designed to let them get out of the current conversational impasse, and was bewildered when Wei Wuxian, possibly inspired by the high tension of the moment, burst out in raucous laughter, reaching out to elbow Lan Wangji in the side.
“I bet you will,” he said, his tone almost jeering. “Quality time, yeah? Just the two of you together in the hanshi and everything.”
It wasn’t until Lan Wangji’s ears reddened slightly that Lan Xichen comprehended what Wei Wuxian was implying. That he had left a year’s seclusion because, what, he wanted to hop into bed with Nie Huaisang?
The mere notion was so puerile that it could barely be considered as rising to the level of a joke, the implication not only crude but actively cruel and disdainful of all the work Lan Xichen had done to put himself back together over the past year, and Lan Xichen had absolutely no idea how he was supposed to respond.
He glanced at Lan Wangji, wondering if his brother would say something – apologize, maybe – but he was clearly unable or unwilling to help. Finally, he shook his head and walked away.
That was the first time.
-
The second time – and many of the other times thereafter – were not accidental at all.
Talking with Nie Huaisang had been wretchedly painful but cleansing, necessary, just as his silent and extended contemplation in seclusion had been. They had not wholly forgiven each other for everything that had happened, whether the harms they had knowingly or unknowingly inflicted or for the agonies they had each suffered, but they were on a path to get there together – each one of them agreeing to learn from what had happened, to try to extend trust to each other, real trust, so that neither of them had to continue on their lonely roads alone.
It might be nearly two decades late, but Lan Xichen was determined to make good on his promise to Nie Mingjue, and Nie Huaisang equally determined in his own way to live up to what his brother would have wanted now that it was an option.
One unexpected aspect of this, interestingly, was how the clash between their values – Lan sect rules, Nie sect principles – gave rise to any number of very interesting analytical conversations. Nie Huaisang was a poor scholar for rules that required rote memorization to learn, but he understood his sect’s moral code down to his bones, well enough to be able to fashion himself a path within it. When pressed for his thoughts on any given subject, his arguments were well-fashioned, logical, and difficult to refute.
Lan Xichen had not enjoyed himself so much in years.
Even in the days when he had wholly believed in Jin Guangyao, his former friend was simply too facile to have a proper back-and-forth with: he would always yield, or seem to, or else dance around the main subject until they were on another on which they could agree; he had always prioritized good feeling over intellecutal growth. He’d never understood what enjoyment could be gotten out of standing your ground on some theoretical or philosophical issue.
At any rate, one of the points Nie Huaisang had won, curiously enough, was in regards to the subject of pettiness: bad in large doses, but acceptable in small, in his view. He compared it to venting frustrations or to understanding and indulging oneself in the positive sense – if you’re a petty person, he said matter-of-factly, you can try to improve yourself, but you’re not going accept yourself unless you just admit it. If that’s the sort of person you were, you wouldn’t get anywhere constantly resisting the urge to fight things out in petty, stupid ways.
Sometimes you just wanted to get into it over something stupid because otherwise you’d get into it over something important, and that was, in Nie Huaisang’s view, not a bad thing: if someone got in your face, get back in theirs.
Lan Xichen was, in many ways, a petty person.
“So, how is Nie Huaisang doing?” Wei Wuxian asked when lunch was not entirely over. Etiquette dictated that Lan Xichen had to respond, and family rules that he knew Wei Wuxian knew made clear it was impermissible to talk over meals: the only acceptable solution, therefore, was for him to consider his half-eaten meal as already complete, respond, and wait until dinner to fill up. And all because Wei Wuxian simply couldn’t wait another half-ke to blurt out his question, because he was too free and unrestrained to honor the rules of the family he had married into just because he personally didn’t think they were important. “Where is he, anyway? I would’ve thought he’d be here with us.”
Lan Xichen put down his bowl with just a little extra more force than he should, enough to make it clink against the table, and Lan Wangji’s eyes tightened a little at the unusual display of irritation.
“He’s still in bed,” Lan Xichen said mildly. “I’m afraid I rather wore him out last night.”
Wei Wuxian choked, misunderstanding, just as Lan Xichen had intended him to.
They’d gotten onto an interesting subject of conversation and had ended up talking most of the previous day’s afternoon and evening, as it happened, and Nie Huaisang was still a sect leader, with important business to attend to; Lan Xichen was fairly sure that after he had retired at the usual time for his sect, Nie Huaisang had worked until nearly dawn. Anyway, Nie Huaisang wasn’t much for set meal-times, not even by Wei Wuxian’s lax standards; he’d shared an early breakfast with Lan Xichen before going to sleep.
“Perhaps you can speak with him later, if you need him,” Lan Xichen said, folding his hands in front of him. “I will pass along your regards when I return to the hanshi. Which I should do now, in fact: I have some correspondence I need to attend to.”
Lan Xichen wondered if Wei Wuxian even noticed that his words signified Lan Xichen’s graceful removal of the work of sect correspondence from Lan Wangji, returning it into his own hands. Lan Qiren and Lan Wangji had managed sect business between them during Lan Xichen’s seclusion, and both had recognized that even though he had emerged from that seclusion he was still very much in the midst of his recovery and neither had tried to push him back into the role of Sect Leader. His announcement that he needed to attend to correspondence indicated that he was shouldering that burden once more – moreover, it was, by Lan sect standards, a rather vicious snub to make the announcement of the transition a public one, however subtle the wording, especially when he did not similarly make any sort of announcement regarding the work his uncle was managing on his behalf.
Petty.
Unnecessarily petty, really – it wasn’t Lan Wangji’s fault that he’d married a man who couldn’t even after all this time comprehend that sometimes you valued something because someone else did, even if you yourself didn’t care for or understand it.  
It was, however, his fault in not putting a stop to Wei Wuxian’s rudeness.
It wasn’t actually hard for a grown man to at least try to respect a rule as basic as do not speak during meals, or for that matter the one about not making tremendous noise late at night when you knew everyone else was sleeping. Having previously been in seclusion, Lan Xichen wasn’t aware of how bad it had gotten, with disciples rearranging their living quarters further and further away from any place Lan Wangji and Wei Wuxian might be found breaking the rules against excessive promiscuity – and really, Lan Wangji should know better. No one was asking that he refrain from being in love, even extravagantly so, but they did live in a community, and he ought to have basic respect for others, even if it meant occasionally saying no to his beloved long-lost and miraculously reunited lover.
Lan Xichen knew how hard it was for him to say no, of course; he suffered from the same generosity of spirit as his brother. But hadn’t everything that had happened a year ago shown the folly of always saying yes?
-
“Ah, Wei-xiong,” Lan Xichen said a few days later when they crossed paths in the middle of the day. “Are you on your way to the apothecary? Could I ask you to pick up a few items for me?”
Wei Wuxian shifted uncomfortably from one foot to the other, presumably still aching from the bout of early afternoon delight that he and Lan Wangji had been indulging in over by the cold spring – which was meant to be a place for cultivation for all, not a private garden in which the young master of the sect could frolic like one of his pet rabbits. It would have to be cleaned before anyone else could use it, and Lan Wangji was undoubtedly back there giving those orders now, his forehead ribbon no doubt askew from having been utilized in private activity before being hastily replaced.
“Certainly, Xichen-xiong,” he said. “What do you need?”
“Some ointments of the sort used for stretching and to ease pain,” Lan Xichen said. “Huaisang has been complaining of soreness and stiffness as of late.”
He had, of course – among his misfortunes, Nie Huaisang had been born with something of a crooked spine, and his lower back would sporadically spasm, causing him great pain. Not that that was what Wei Wuxian was thinking of, of course.
“I’ve tried using my hands on him,” Lan Xichen added, allowing himself to sound regretful – which he was, as he hated to see Nie Huaisang suffering. “But he says it’s not enough, given the, ah, magnitude of the issue. I want to get him some relief and make sure he’s comfortable
I’m sure you understand.”
He was sure Wei Wuxian did not.
“Uh, sure,” Wei Wuxian said, barely bothering to hide the fact that he was giggling under his breath. “I’ll grab some for you, no problem
you should really ask Nie Huaisang to give you some, uh, books. To provide you with some guidance.”
“He’s provided several,” Lan Xichen said peaceably. Nie Huaisang was extremely fussy; naturally he would ensure that Lan Xichen was well supplied in guides on massage before allowing him to tend to him. “But thank you for the suggestion.”
Wei Wuxian nodded and saluted briefly, clearly ready to move on.
“Oh,” Lan Xichen said, as if only just remembering. “And tell Wangji that he doesn’t need to come to the meeting this evening – I know the two of you have better things to do with your time than having him listen to interminable reports on agriculture.”
Wei Wuxian actually smiled at that, as if the quarterly agricultural reports from the farms that fed the entire Cloud Recesses weren’t one of the most critical duties for Lan clan members to attend to and one that Lan Wangji had been assisting with since the age of twelve.
That task accomplished, Lan Xichen returned to the hanshi, where Nie Huaisang was scowling over the initial reports that had come in from the furthest farms in writing – he’d already offered to supplement any harvest shortfalls with the excess from Qinghe’s own extremely productive fields, but any shortage in one area could lead to shortages in others; no one wanted another famine among the common people the way there had been during the Sunshot Campaign and the hard years thereafter.
“Are you sure you know what you’re doing?” he asked doubtfully when Lan Xichen mentioned that he’d excused Lan Wangji from attending that evening and would therefore be doubly reliant on Nie Huaisang’s recollection of the meeting afterwards. “Lan Wangji may think you’re punishing him for marrying Wei Wuxian, which you’re not.”
“I’m not,” Lan Xichen agreed, because he wasn’t. If anything, he’d encouraged them to get together, and no matter the cost to himself, he was happy that Lan Wangji had achieved his heart’s desire after wanting it for such a long time.
“He may also interpret it as you punishing him for failing to control his spouse.”
“I don’t want him to control his spouse,” Lan Xichen said. “I want him to have some self-respect. Wangji has always greatly respected the rules of our sect and, until now, has always thought carefully before choosing to break them, accepting the consequences for doing so no matter how harsh. If I believed that Wangji truly disagreed with the rules, I would be willing to engage with him on the subject in good faith, but that isn’t what’s happening. He still believes in the rules.”
“He just doesn’t have the balls to tell Wei Wuxian that he wants him to stop stamping all over them?”
Lan Xichen huffed lightly. “I wouldn’t have put it that way.”
“But it’s what you think,” Nie Huaisang concluded.
“It is,” Lan Xichen said. “They’re going to spend the rest of their lives together – is Wangji planning on letting Wei Wuxian to win every argument without fail, no matter the cost to himself? Is he even planning on informing with him what the cost of his actions is? To always give and never take is not an equal relationship.”
“And your increased sensitivity on the subject of keeping secrets from your loved ones for, purportedly, their own good is completely beside the point, I assume?”
“The fact that I’m sensitive doesn’t make me wrong,” Lan Xichen said. “If Wangji is keeping secrets from Wei Wuxian, if he’s unwilling to rely on him or share his troubles with him, if he intends to one-sidedly sacrifice everything for him without even consulting with him as to whether he would be willing to accept such a sacrifice, then what they have isn’t a marriage.”
There was a house filled with purple gentians in the Cloud Recesses that stood as the eternal reminder of what that sort of marriage looked like, a terrible sacrifice that eventually became as much of a shackle on the recipient as it had been on the giver. Lan Xichen wouldn’t allow Lan Wangji to make that mistake.
And as for Wei Wuxian...if he truly oved Lan Wangji, he wouldn’t want it, either.
Lan Xichen certainly hadn’t.
Nie Huaisang sighed gustily. “All right, fine, fine. You know me, I’m always in favor of people standing up for what they think is the right thing even when it’s hard –” This was an almost grotesque understatement, but the friendship they were forging now was in some large parts based on the gallows humor emerging from their shared traumas. “– so I will reluctantly endorse your actions and, even more reluctantly, attend your meeting with you to take notes for later.”
“I appreciate your help. And your endorsement, of course.”
-
“Nie Huaisang has gotten much better at playing the xiao,” Lan Xichen remarked to Wei Wuxian on the day he removed Lan Wangji from the teaching roster and disqualified him from accompanying the juniors in night-hunts. “He’s a very – hands-on learner.”
Wei Wuxian snorted.
“I’ve been demonstrating the proper technique for him. Breath control is paramount, naturally, but of course you also have to know what to do with your tongue
”
Wei Wuxian was full on sniggering. “Oh, I bet,” he said salaciously. “I’m sure you’re a very hands-on teacher, eh, Xichen-xiong?”
“I want him to excel,” Lan Xichen agreed. “And that means plenty of practice
oh, I’m sorry, Wei-xiong. I shouldn’t have interrupted you – you were running somewhere?”
Right in the middle of the main pathways, no less, where the quick footfalls and sudden movement had startled countless people into very nearly raising an alarm before they realized there wasn’t anything to worry about. There were too many of them that remembered the war.
They had taken comfort in the enforced tranquility of the Cloud Recesses, before.
“Oh, no, don’t worry about it,” Wei Wuxian said breezily. “Just had an idea and wanted to get back to my workshop as quickly as possible, that’s all.”
“I see,” Lan Xichen said. “I won’t stand in your way, then.”
He actually was teaching Nie Huaisang how to play the xiao, at his request – he’d made some comparisons to it while debating a matter of ethics, and Nie Huaisang was determined to learn just enough to argue back in kind.
Lan Xichen didn’t have any illusions that Nie Huaisang would stick with it any more than he’d stuck with any other type of cultivation – he’d first tried teaching him musical cultivation when he was a child without any success at all, and Jin Guangyao’s example had definitely not endeared Nie Huaisang to the concept – but it was rather nice to discuss music without necessarily focusing on the backdrop of cultivation within it.
Accordingly, he continued the metaphor with Wei Wuxian for several days running. He talked about how energetic a student Nie Huaisang was –“He’s wearing me out,” he said, shaking his head. “Draining me dry
” – and mentioned that they were having an interesting time going back and forth on the subject of fingering, despite Nie Huaisang’s claims that his weak fingers weren’t nearly as suited for quick, assured movement as Lan Xichen’s.
“I don’t know what he’s talking about,” Lan Xichen had said, even as Wei Wuxian had nearly cried from laughter. “His fingers are very flexible, and I get a great deal of enjoyment from his enthusiasm. Skill comes later.”
“Definitely something you have to work on together,” Wei Wuxian said enthusiastically. “It gets better as you go, doesn’t it?”
In the past few days, he had brought alcohol into public places, rather than leaving it in the jingshi where the breach would be a minor one, and tried to encourage the juniors to share it with him, although they’d refused; he’d even tried to bully them into doing so using his superior age and the respect they’d owed him until Lan Xichen had intervened with ‘urgent’ tasks for the juniors instead.
He had loudly speculated regarding one sect elder’s marital affairs after the man had refused to speak with him following a disagreement, breaking both the rules against malicious gossip and those against disrespecting the older generation all at once. He had gone hunting and fishing right outside the boundary line of the Cloud Recesses in clear sight of the disciples, including several who were attempting to practice cultivation based on compassion for all creatures; several others were pulled from their usual tasks to go purify the ground according to their customs, including a careful check of their wells to ensure that the blood and viscera had not seeped into the groundwater that ran so high and near to the surface.
In return, Lan Xichen relieved Lan Wangji of his requirement to go patrolling – “You’re married now, after all,” he’d said to Wei Wuxian, as if it wasn’t a duty shared by adult every sect member, “I’m sure you want the benefit of his company at night. Isn’t that right?” – and revoked his access to the restricted areas of the sect, including the discipline hall of which he had had sole charge since before the age of fifteen. He asked his uncle to resume the full schedule of teaching, including the classes which had previously been shifted in part over to Lan Wangji – his uncle agreed, understanding his motives, although he looked sick to his stomach with anxiety the way he always did when Lan Xichen and Lan Wangji were fighting – and had publicly chided one of the juniors for “bothering” Lan Wangji with questions regarding his cultivation.
“Aren’t you so old already?” he scolded gently, a smile fixed on his face and his eyes firmly on the junior instead of his brother standing beside him. “You can’t go running to Wangji with every little issue that comes to mind. Reflect on yourself, and take pains not to be a burden to others.”
The junior appeared very nearly on the verge of tears, and he was not the only one. He, at least, understood the significance of Lan Xichen issuing the reprimand in public – if the junior in question had truly been pestering Lan Wangji with too many questions, it would have been a tremendous rebuke to him personally; as he had not, and everyone knew he had not, it was a clear order from the sect leader that no one was to bring any questions to Lan Wangji.
“Brother,” Lan Wangji said, his voice low and hurt.
“I know you must be tired, recently,” Lan Xichen said, looking back at him with a steady, unflinching gaze. “I understand that you and your husband have been taking long walks at night.”
Through residential areas, no less, and Lan Wangji knew better. Perhaps their sect was too strict with the rules about waking and resting, strict enough that the other sects laughed at them over it, but the rules were in place for a reason. Even if Lan Wangji himself was feeling restless enough to wander at night, there were places he could go that were designated specifically for that – gardens, mountain paths, what have you – where their wanderings would not bother others who had already gone to sleep.
Lan Wangji hesitated, his shoulders rising to his ears, but he dropped his gaze to the ground and nodded, conceding the point.
He knew better.
He knew better, he cared about doing better, and he let Wei Wuxian walk all over him anyway.
“It must be difficult to go walking at zi hour and wake at mao,” Lan Xichen said. “Perhaps waking at si hour would suit you better.”
Lan Wangji looked stricken. After over thirty years of waking at the appropriate time, he would have to be suffering from true bone-deep exhaustion for him not to rise at mao hour per their rules; Lan Xichen’s suggestion, if he enforced it, would do nothing but restrict him from leaving the jingshi until that later time.
Confinement was not a punishment Lan Xichen inflicted lightly on anyone, least of all his brother. His brother, who had suffered just as much from what had happened to their mother as he had.
“Perhaps you can use the additional time to talk to your spouse,” Lan Xichen said.
Tell him that you don’t like how he ignores all our rules like he’s trying to make a contest out of it, he meant. Tell him that you wince every time he puts his foot in it, every time he offends someone he didn’t have to, every time he disrespects our ancestors and all but spits on everything they cared about. Tell him that you’ll compromise on some rules, the ones that are genuinely hard for him, but that you want him to follow others out of respect for the fact that they mean something to you.
He would do it for you, Wangji. He loves you. You don’t always have to be the one to sacrifice.
Just tell him.
Lan Wangji’s lips pressed together.
Another refusal. It wasn’t that Lan Xichen didn’t know how stubborn his brother could be, especially in matters relating to Wei Wuxian, and he didn’t really want to match wills against him – he never really had, not in all their life. He loved his little brother so very much, and so Lan Xichen always been the one to yield, the one to give in, the one to make up the difference between them. The one to encourage him, the one to look the other way: whatever Lan Wangji had needed or even wanted, Lan Xichen had sought to give him.
Even the dreadful punishment with the discipline whip had been something Lan Xichen had sought to avert, and would have, if only Lan Wangji had not so self-destructively insisted upon it.
He had allowed it to proceed only because he thought that the physical pain would give Lan Wangji some measure of relief from the enormous emotional pain he was suffering from.
But now – this wasn’t just a temporary physical pain that Lan Wangji was trying to choose.
This was the rest of his life.
Lan Xichen was not going to back down over this.
“Si hour it is, then,” he said with a sigh. Nor would he revoke the instruction he had implicitly given to the juniors that Lan Wangji was no longer an acceptable advisor, unable to guide them in the Lan sect rules that he was constantly defying by proxy. “It’s for the best, I suppose. It’ll help habituate you.”
Lan Wangji looked up sharply.
Lan Xichen met his gaze head on. His brother, he reflected, was for once the one underestimating his stubbornness.
“I understand,” he said, his words very slow and very deliberate and very carefully chosen, “that rising at si hour is customary in the Lotus Pier, if a little late. That’s where Wei Wuxian picked up his habits, was it not?”
Lan Wangji’s eyes were wide as if he couldn’t believe Lan Xichen was saying what he was saying.
Perhaps he had become infected by Wei Wuxian’s obliviousness and needed things to be said flat out.
Very well.
“The Cloud Recesses is the home of the Lan,” Lan Xichen said. “Our lives are here, guided by our rules that are laid out on the Wall of Discipline for all to see. It is the life we have all chosen, freely and without coercion – but I know it is not the life for everyone.”
“Brother!” Lan Wangji exclaimed, and he actually looked viscerally upset, the expression clear enough on his face that even Wei Wuxian ought to be able to tell what he was feeling.
“You don’t have to follow them if you don’t want to, Wangji,” Lan Xichen continued, inexorable. He, like most of his sect, disliked this sort of straightforwardness, but he was Nie Mingjue’s sworn brother and Nie Huaisang’s brother by proxy; he knew how to wield his words with the brutality of a saber as well as the grace of a sword or the gentle lilt of the xiao. “But I will not allow you to continue making a mockery of them. Not here.”
Lan Wangji looked as if he’d been stabbed.
No – Lan Xichen had seen his brother get stabbed. He had taken that better than this.
“I will write to Sect Leader Jiang by the end of the week,” Lan Xichen said, and clasped his hands behind his back to keep them from trembling. Tell him before then. Please. “Between the two of us, I’m certain that we can find somewhere to suit both you and your husband, so that you may live as free and unrestrained as you wish.”
He did Lan Wangji the honor of not looking back as he walked away.
He knew his brother wouldn’t want him to see the tears.
-
It was, if anything, a pleasant surprise when Wei Wuxian burst into Lan Xichen’s home less than a day later. Lan Xichen had thought it would take at least three.
“What is wrong with you?” Wei Wuxian shouted, slamming his hands down on the table in front of Lan Xichen. “What the fuck is wrong with you? Is it me? If it’s me you have a problem with, say it to my face directly!”
Lan Xichen finished swallowing the tea he’d just sipped. “Not everything is about you,” he said, feeling tired. “This is about Wangji.”
Wei Wuxian’s eyes were red-rimmed as if he, too, had been crying.
“You’re not seriously planning on kicking him out of the Cloud Recesses because I broke a few of your rules, are you?” he asked, biting off each word individually. “He’s your brother. He’s a perfect Lan – he ran your sect for a year!”
“Our sect,” Lan Xichen corrected. “Wangji will always have a place here, as will you.”
Wei Wuxian crossed his arms over his chest. “Then why is he convinced that you want him to go?”
Lan Xichen sighed.
“I’m sure his knees hurt,” he said.
“
what?”
“His knees,” Lan Xichen said. “From all the kneeling he’s been doing.”
Wei Wuxian looked truly bewildered now. “Are you – making a sex joke?” he said. “Now?”
“No, though I’m unsurprised you took it as one,” Lan Xichen said, resisting the urge to roll his eyes. “I’m referring to all the kneeling in penance that my brother has been doing to atone for all the rules he has been breaking on your behalf. You wouldn’t have noticed it, as I assume he’s been deliberately hiding it from you.”
Wei Wuxian stared at him. “He’s been kneeling?”
“Wangji cares very deeply about our sect’s traditions,” Lan Xichen said. “He would never have been made the head of the discipline hall if he didn’t. He knows them backwards and forwards, better than anyone except for my uncle and the sect elders that specialize in it. They’re important to him.”
“But –”
“He keeps track of every rule you instigate him into breaking,” Lan Xichen said flatly. “Every single one, large and small, major or minor, and he tries to do his best to pay for what he’s done because he’d rather kneel all night without getting any sleep, rather hurt his hand copying out rules, rather endure a beating or two if it means he doesn’t have to tell you to stop.”
Wei Wuxian’s mouth was slightly agape.
“Do you remember the story I told you about our parents? I shared that story with you for a reason, because I wanted you to better understand Wangji. We all carry the scars our parents left on us, and he’s no different. He’s so afraid of imprisoning you the way our father did our mother that he has decided to follow in our father’s footsteps by sacrificing everything for you.”
“I don’t – I don’t want him to sacrifice anything for me!”
“I know,” Lan Xichen said simply. “That’s why I said that this wasn’t about you. Yes, now that you live here, you should follow our rules, or at least respect them – and respect means respect, not playing around to see how many loopholes you can find in them. Do you think we don’t know about them? That no one in the history of our sect has ever figured out that ‘do not take life within the premises’ could be subverted by taking a life directly outside of it?”
Wei Wuxian was silent.
“We follow the rules because we want to,” Lan Xichen said. “They’re the rules our ancestors put together and handed down. They are meaningful to us, even when they are awkward or seem pointless. Even when other people laugh at us or belittle us or act like we’re stupid for choosing to behave the way we do.”
Wei Wuxian winced.
“Your conduct would be a problem if you were a guest,” Lan Xichen continued. “But you are not a guest. You are Wangji’s husband, my brother-in-law. You are family. If you do not wish to obey the rules, you do not have to, and you will still be welcome here. But Wangji wants to obey the rules – it is only that he fears losing you more.”
“How long have you been having this argument?” Wei Wuxian asked, because he wasn’t actually stupid, merely oblivious.
“I started taking away his responsibilities on the third day following my exit from seclusion,” Lan Xichen said. “I have steadily escalated it with every rule you have incited him into breaking with you since. And still, he refused to speak with you.”
Wei Wuxian’s hands were clenched into fists. He looked down at them.
“I know how much you love my brother,” Lan Xichen said. “If he had told you that it mattered to him, you would have found a way to reach a compromise with him – of that I have no doubt. But if it wasn’t the rules, it would be something else; some other thing that he would choose to sacrifice, another situation where he would choose to endure agony over having a mildly uncomfortable conversation with you. That was why I couldn’t just reach out to you directly. It had to be him; he had to be the one to tell you.”
“I understand,” Wei Wuxian said. “I don’t
I’d rather find it out over this than have him throw away his life instead of telling me I was being stupid.”
Lan Xichen nodded. That had been his fear as well, and the reason that one of his first moves had been to restrict Lan Wangji from going out on night-hunts.
“I’ll talk to him,” Wei Wuxian said, and scrubbed his face. His eyes had started tearing up again. “I’ll – I’ll talk to him. I’ll make him understand that it’s not – he can’t just do that! He didn’t even ask me if I wanted him to give all of that up for me; he knew I wouldn’t want him to, that’s why he didn’t ask, and he just went ahead and did it anyway. He didn’t tell me that he was suffering, that you were taking away his responsibilities! He didn’t say a single word, and I just blithely carried on thinking everything was fucking all right and all the while he was suffering, and – and he – he
oh, fuck. Fuck. Fuck!”
Lan Xichen blinked.
“I did the exact same fucking thing to Jiang Cheng!” Wei Wuxian exploded. He leapt to his feet. “I’m such a fucking idiot! Lan Zhan and me, we’re both – we’re really well matched, aren’t we?”
He shook his head.
“I’ll talk to Lan Zhan,” he said again, and he looked grimly determined the way he had in the war, the same expression shining through even with a new face. “Don’t worry, Xichen-xiong. I’ll make him understand.”
He turned on his heel and marched out of the room.
Lan Xichen watched him go, thinking to himself that he might have inadvertently done something good for Wei Wuxian as well through all of this. And perhaps it would help Lan Wangji’s own crisis to see Wei Wuxian going through the same – because Lan Wangji’s crisis had already taken place.
He could have lied to Wei Wuxian’s face over why they were leaving. He could have chosen not to tell him that Lan Xichen was forcing him out, cutting him off; he could have kept it secret, hidden, could have come up with some story or just left it all unsaid. If he was truly determined to never let any of his pain onto Wei Wuxian’s shoulders, he could have done that.
He’d chosen to come clean instead.
Maybe now they’d be able to move forward as equals, as partners.
(And, if they were really lucky, maybe finally reaching agreement to stop breaking all the rules all the time would mean that they’d stop having sex on every possible available surface and keep it to the jingshi and a few gardens. No one else needed to see that. Really.)
-
“I see that Wangji-xiong and Wei-xiong are now even more disgustingly in love than ever before,” Nie Huaisang said. “And that Wei-xiong seems to have finally gotten over his obsession with defying authority through violating each and every one of the Lan sect rules. I was only away at the Unclean Realm for three days, you know.”
“I work fast,” Lan Xichen said with a smile.
Lan Wangji had come to him, eyes red, and put his head in Lan Xichen’s lap the way he used to as a child, and they’d talked. For hours, they’d talked, in the slow and halting way they had – where each word was carefully considered, each emotion analyzed, and only a quarter of conversation was said out loud – and at the end of it, they were both completely wrecked, but stronger for it.
They’d talked about their parents, which they had never verbalized before; they talked about Jin Guangyao, and Nie Mingjue, and Wei Wuxian, both past and present. They talked about their ruined expectations, their hopes, their guilt; they talked about the rules that bound them both, the ones that served them as both strength and weakness, the foundation on which they relied in their times of doubt. They talked about love, and fear, and anger.
They’d promised to never to need to have to have this conversation ever again, and they were both very determined to keep that promise.
Lan Qiren had agreed to work with Wei Wuxian regarding which rules could be bent and which ones ought not be – finally giving him the full version of education he’d missed out on when he’d been returned home too early by Jiang Fengmian all those years before, because copying rules didn’t mean understanding them – and Lan Xichen had returned to Lan Wangji all the responsibilities and privileges he’d taken away from him, much to the relief of all the juniors that had been suffering through their fight.
(Lan Wangji confided in Lan Xichen that he was relieved that Lan Sizhui and Lan Jingyi had been away on a long visit to Lanling Jin throughout the entire debacle, and Lan Xichen wholeheartedly agreed.)
“That you do,” Nie Huaisang said. “Did being straightforward help?”
“More than expected,” Lan Xichen conceded. That had been one of the things he and Nie Huaisang had been discussing these past few weeks, the merits of straightforwardness against obliqueness, and they’d both argued both sides of the issue, given their personal experiences. “I will grant you that it served its purpose well in this situation.”
“Good,” Nie Huaisang said, and put his chin into his hands. “Now tell me, what’s this I hear about you and me being the subject of a series of apparently godawful sex jokes?”
Lan Xichen froze.
Nie Huaisang grinned.
“It was
a metaphor?” Lan Xichen tried. “A means of communicating with Wei Wuxian while not acknowledging the ongoing situation, and a message about paying attention to underlying meaning.”
“Try again,” Nie Huaisang said gleefully. “You could’ve done that without invoking my name.”
“Who else could I invoke? I spend all my time with you!”
All the time he wasn’t being Sect Leader, that was. If there was one good thing that had come out of this entire debacle beyond his heart-to-heart with Lan Wangji, it was that Lan Xichen had been so anxious over Lan Wangji that he had forgotten his own fears about resuming his position, and now that he was back, it didn’t seem as scary as it had when he’d been alone in his room in seclusion.
Nie Huaisang did not appear especially moved by this eminently logical argument. He put his hands over his heart and fluttered his eyelashes, saying in an affected, almost operatic voice, “And all this time I never knew you felt like that, Xichen-gege –”
Lan Xichen choked.
“To think that all of this time that we spent cloistered together, pure as virgins, we could have been doing all sorts of things – using my, what was the term used, ample assets –”
Lan Xichen wondered if it would be possible for the ground to swallow him up at this very second. Failing that, a sect emergency would do.
Possibly an invasion?
“– and this, of course, refers to my extremely large
stock of picture books.”
“Huaisang
”
Nie Huaisang laughed at his face and settled down across from him. “I’m not ready to court or be courted,” he said. “Sorry to disappoint you.”
“No,” Lan Xichen said. “I’m not either, I don’t think.”
He was starting to think that he might be one day, though. That there would be a day – a distant day, far in the future, just barely coming into view – where his days would be more all right than not, where he could make decisions and be confident that he was making them for himself and not to cover up some mess of trauma.
And maybe, when that day arrived for him, it would also arrive for Nie Huaisang, who was himself digging himself back out of the deep pit he had made in his soul seeking his lonely vengeance.
“Still,” Nie Huaisang said thoughtfully. “Since Wei-xiong and Lan Wangji are on their way here right now to join us, and given that I’m already crushing your hopes and dreams
”
Lan Xichen foresaw a great deal of mockery in his future, and he was almost looking forward to it.
“
do you want to pretend to be making out on the table that they’ll have to drink tea off until they catch us and plead for mercy?”
Well.
Lan Xichen did always say that he was petty.
340 notes · View notes
makeste · 4 years ago
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“...and I bullied him.”
hello, hello, good afternoon or evening or whatever time it is. so by now we’ve all had some time to bask in those “Kacchan admitted he cares about Deku” feels (well, technically they were “All Might pointed out that Kacchan was worried about Deku and Kacchan didn’t deny it” feels, BUT THOSE MIGHT AS WELL BE THE SAME FEELS, YOU KNOW). and it’s been lovely. I’ve been having a time. it’s been nice.
but now I would like to talk a bit more about a part of this chapter which I think was even more important.
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for me, this was the line of the chapter. this one panel may honestly be the biggest piece of Kacchan character development since all the way back in chapter 120. “I ended up bullying him.” okay but guys?? can we just talk?? about how absolutely extraordinary this one sentence is.
it’s self-aware.
introspection? from a kid who’s had to be dragged kicking and screaming to every character development milestone he’s ever experienced in his life? and on an emotional level that actually goes deeper, and doesn’t just stop at the surface-level anger that’s so often his instinctive reaction to everything? who are you and what have you done with Bakugou Katsuki lol.
but seriously, the level of self-analysis here almost stunned me, guys. not only does he demonstrate a very impressive level of insight into Deku (something I especially love because it mirrors the many analyses Deku has made of him, and shows that the understanding between them is actually mutual), but he also shows an unprecedented degree of insight into himself. like, historically speaking, Bakugou and Feelings have not always exactly been on the same page, you know? so for him to suddenly get so thoughtful now, and sincerely try to analyze these feelings which up until now he’s always ignored and avoided dealing with... that is such a huge step. also, bonus points: he recognizes it as a problem within himself, and doesn’t try to pin the blame on Deku in any way. he recognizes that he’s the one who reacted badly to Deku’s behavior. to be able to examine your own feelings like that and arrive at a conclusion that acknowledges that you’re not the good guy in this, that you’re the one who made the mistake -- that takes a level of accountability that not everyone possesses.
it’s self-prompted.
okay this one is a big deal honestly. no one put a gun to Katsuki’s head here and forced him to confess this. all All Might said was “you’re worried about him too” and that somehow prompted a level of emotional honesty that Katsuki has never before shown. now, based on the fact that the successors’ notebook is still fresh in Katsuki’s mind, and that All Might mentioned earlier that Aizawa couldn’t help because he was “busy at the moment”, this conversation likely took place shortly after the kids returned from their New Year’s break. meaning that this was basically right after the Endeavor internship arc, when thoughts about seeking atonement were still fresh on Katsuki’s mind. so this isn’t entirely out of the blue; it shows that Katsuki did, in fact, learn exactly what All Might was hoping he would learn from Endeavor.
but it’s one thing for this to be on his mind, and another thing entirely for him to actually confess it out loud. and I absolutely will give him full credit for that. he admits, without anyone forcing him to, that he bullied Deku. there’s no incentive for him to do this whatsoever. Deku isn’t there to hear it. he’s not admitting it for the purposes of seeking forgiveness. he’s simply just being honest, and owning up to what he did because he realizes it was wrong. and that takes a lot of inner strength, to do that. to not shy away from it and keep pretending like it never happened. this is a huge first step for him.
it’s a confession that leaves him emotionally vulnerable.
this is another big one. it’s not always evident because he makes a big effort to downplay it, but Katsuki looks up to All Might every bit as much as Deku does. he seeks his approval, he wants All Might to be proud of him, even though he very often puts on a big show of not caring about it at all. it means a lot to him. a lot.
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and Katsuki knows how much All Might cares about Deku. and sure, All Might is already perfectly aware that Katsuki and Deku aren’t exactly on the best of terms, and he’s always been understanding about it; always gently compassionate and attempting to smooth things out between them without being judgmental.
but All Might also doesn’t know everything about the two of them. and even with Kacchan and Deku’s relationship never exactly being on the most rock solid of terms at U.A., there’s still a vast difference between the way they interact there, and the way that they interacted back in middle school. when Katsuki was not only hostile, but occasionally downright cruel. and when Deku was still quirkless, and very much not on equal footing with Kacchan in terms of power, and yet Kacchan bullied him anyway.
what Katsuki is confessing here puts him at risk of rejection from one of the people whose opinion of him matters the most. he’s opening himself up to the possibility that All Might might not, for once, react with his trademark understanding. he’s admitting to All Might, I did something unherolike, and I hurt someone you care about, and I didn’t have a good reason for doing it. All Might, in the moment immediately following this statement, has an incredible amount of power over Katsuki. he has the ability to withdraw his support, to condemn him, to pull away and decide that Katsuki is not someone worthy of becoming a hero after all. he has all the power in the world over Katsuki in this one moment; a rejection from him would be a blow he’d never recover from.
and Katsuki, knowing this, tells him anyway. willingly opens himself up to that possibility of being hurt, of being rejected and shunned by the person who inspired his dream. because the alternative is being dishonest with him. this is, in short, a decision made because he believes All Might deserves to know this, and deserves to hear the truth from him. he wants his approval so badly, but he can’t live with the knowledge that he’s “tricked” him into giving it. so he tells him the truth, ready to face whatever consequences might arise from that. and I think that might be one of the bravest things he’s ever done.
it’s not attempting to shirk responsibility.
this, right here, is why Katsuki is my favorite character. because even though he’s flawed, even though he’s made a lot of mistakes, when he realizes that and is confronted by it, he never tries to hide from them. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: to me, the essence of Katsuki is that he is someone who is always trying to be better. he wants to be a good hero; he wants to be a good person. when people point out to him that he’s done something wrong, he listens. it doesn’t always sink in right away, sure, and sometimes he gets stubborn and it can be hard to hammer that truth in. but once he gets it, he always makes the change. he never tries to make excuses. he owns up to his shit and does his best to course correct.
with this acknowledgement here, that he bullied Deku, there’s no attempt on his part to say that it was Deku’s fault, that Deku shouldn’t have done this or that. he doesn’t blame his parents or his teachers or try to act like he didn’t know any better. he makes no attempt whatsoever to justify it. it’s just simple, honest truth. back then, I ignored my own weakness, so I ended up bullying him. it’s a plea of guilt. no attempt to mitigate it or downplay it. the verb he uses, “ijimeta”, doesn’t water it down.
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“to ill-treat; to torment; to be cruel to.” there’s no attempt here to paint this in a flattering light at all. which is good. because in order for him to really atone for it, to really go the distance in his redemption arc which we’re all rooting for him to do, the most important step is for him to take responsibility. he can’t learn from it if he’s trying to hide from it or make excuses for what he did wrong. he has to fully acknowledge his mistakes. and that’s exactly what this is.
it shows remorse.
that’s right y’all. they sent my boy out to do an internship with Endeavor over the holidays, and he came back having learned the true meaning of Christmas. his heart really did grow three sizes. honey badger does care.
there is genuine, sincere remorse for his actions here. he’s sorry for what he did. he regrets what he did. there’s real contrition there. it’s not forced or insincere. again, nobody made him say this! nobody pressured him, nobody led him on. these are his own feelings. I bullied Deku. I shouldn’t have done that to him. I want to atone for it.
I know some people in fandom don’t think this is enough. the same thing happened with Endeavor as well. people aren’t always satisfied with restorative justice; they want retribution. they want punishment for his actions. and that’s a natural feeling; it stems back to that instinct of wanting everything to be fair, which I mentioned in another meta not too long ago.
but the thing is, retributive, punitive justice doesn’t actually help anyone. it doesn’t restore what was lost. Katsuki being punished doesn’t do anything to undo what was done to Deku. it doesn’t do anything to heal the harm that was dealt. it doesn’t do anything to make things better for either of them moving forward.
but do you know what does? restorative justice. making amends. which is exactly what this is building up to now.
it shows an understanding that remorse is not enough, and that in order to move forward he has to take action to be a better person.
Katsuki understands that simply being sorry for what he did is not enough. I suspect that’s one reason why he hasn’t attempted to apologize to Deku yet; because he recognizes that after years of tormenting him for stupid and self-centered reasons, a simple apology might seem meaningless at best and self-serving at worst. it puts pressure on Deku to make a decision to either accept or not accept it. Katsuki saw the Todoroki siblings struggling with a similar conflict not too long ago. and he knows better than anyone else how selfless Deku can be. “deep down, he doesn’t take himself into account, y’know?” and so if Katsuki simply apologizes, Deku might end up offering forgiveness that he doesn’t actually deserve, just because Deku is that kind of person who puts others above himself.
and so rather, what Katsuki has opted to do for now is to put all his efforts into helping Deku. he knows Deku is in a considerable amount of danger. he knows how much Deku has on his plate with the SIXQUIRKS and trying to handle all of that. and he knows there are other potential dangers looming which they don’t even know about yet. he’s been alert and anxious about this -- you saw how quickly his mind leaped to worst-case scenarios about the past OFA users; how he was sure that All Might was hiding something from them, and how agitated and apprehensive he got thinking about what that might be.
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“I’m worried for him. you are, too,” All Might said. and Katsuki didn’t deny it. didn’t even try. he is worried about Deku. he’s worried about what he has to face. he’s worried about him getting in over his head and something happening to him. and so the way that he has chosen to try and atone is to help him. with his training, with his quirks; whatever he can do. if he needs to push him he’ll push him. whatever he can do to help make him stronger. and if he needs to protect him, he’ll do that too.
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atonement is not the same thing as forgiveness. atonement is about trying to make up for what you did, to try and correct your mistakes however you can. it doesn’t mean you’re pardoned from them. all it means is that you’ve acknowledged them, and are doing your best -- doing whatever you can -- to repair the harm done, and to be a better person going forward. and sometimes there is no way to ever completely make up for it. sometimes you can’t undo the harm, because you can’t go back and change the past. the only thing you can change is the now, and the future.
and so Katsuki is trying to atone. he’s trying to be the friend Deku deserves now, since he wasn’t before. he’s trying his best to make things right, and it all starts with this one sentence. that acknowledgement of what he did, of what can’t be changed. acknowledgement of the mistake, so that he can learn from it, so that it never happens again.
so yeah. BnHA Redemption Arcs strike again. Horikoshi you smooth son of a bitch.
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nightingaelic · 3 years ago
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could you do Fallout New Vegas companion’s reactions to a Courier Six who is also the Lone Wanderer telling their stories from their time in DC? (bonus points for Arcade’s reaction to them hating the enclave, and if that would make him decide to keep his past hidden even longer, or if he would still tell them?)
The logistics and implications of this make my head spin. This is also super long, honestly I should just quit writing reacts and start writing fics OH WAIT
Getting the courier talking was a tough thing to do, but on nights where the moon was full and the coyotes' howls were miles away or at least behind some stout walls, on nights where they were a few beers in and they hadn't seen another living soul in a few days, that Mojave Express deliverer started to reminisce. That wasn't really the surprising part, though. No, the surprising part was what they would remember, fondly or not-so-fondly: A world apart from the desert, a continent away on another coast, and stories of life in a vault, a missing father, pure water and a Brotherhood divided.
Arcade Gannon: Arcade didn't mind these moods, at least when they first cropped up. He nodded along as the courier talked about living in their father's shadow, about feeling cornered by their own family's legacy. He hung on their words about living in the cradle of America's history, about Project Purity, all of the gritty details of modifying a GECK to bring water to a devastated wasteland.
Eventually though, the courier's memories soured, with the arrival of Enclave remnants in their life. Arcade folded into himself with every harsh word, every jolt of plasma that had disrupted his friend's world relived in horrific detail. They gestured angrily as they described their newfound purpose, their battle for power with the fractured Brotherhood of Steel at their back, and their smug satisfaction at the moments they were able to crack open Raven Rock and the Enclave's mobile base crawler and lay waste to their tormentors.
It took a few rounds of these stories before the courier noticed he shrank and grew quiet whenever they neared the end of their story about breaking into another vault to find the GECK. They stopped abruptly one night. "What's up with you?"
"Um..." Arcade scratched the back of his neck and looked away. "Nothing. Nothing, I just... have some personal experience with the Enclave, myself."
The courier sighed. "Yeah, there's a few people walking around the West Coast that have similar stories to mine. Arroyo's full of them, for one. Is it something like that?"
Arcade took a deep breath. "I feel... well, it's a lot closer to home, for me. Close enough to raise questions, so I don't talk about it much."
"Close enough to..." The courier twisted their face up in confusion for a moment, before realization set in and their eyes grew large. "You were... your... oh."
"Mmm-hm."
"Well, fuck me." The courier smiled and popped a cap off of another beer. "I've been doing all the talking, haven't I? Let's hear your story about working with the guys in power armor who ruined my life, right after dad did."
Craig Boone: Whenever the courier started up like this, Boone couldn't help but notice a familiar twinge of regret and self-doubt in their voice. It shone through most clearly when they spoke about their time with the Brotherhood of Steel, the men and women they'd fought alongside and lost during their struggle against the remnants of the Enclave. It was there, too, in their story about returning to the vault they grew up in, setting the chaos that had arisen in their wake to rest, but not being able to go back to the way things were.
Boone didn't pry. He knew that feeling well. Instead, he cracked open bottles of beer, liquor, soda, whatever they had on hand during their nights in the desert, and just listened. He'd done the same for Carla, when they were younger and new to each other and he couldn't get enough of her voice and how it flowed endlessly, easily, the way his never could. He absorbed it all now as he did then: The joy, the pain, the loss, the fear, the triumphs and falls and abandoned dreams that filled the courier up and drove them to travel west, beyond anything they had ever known.
That last part stumped Boone a bit, though. "Why didn't you stay?" he finally asked one night.
They looked surprised. "Stay? Stay where? I didn't have a home anymore."
Boone shook his head. "With the Brotherhood. Or some other settlement."
"Like Megaton?" The courier sighed. "I thought about it. Close to the vault, friendly people, easy work... I guess I just didn't want to wind up... stuck."
They flushed red and looked away from him. Boone knew why they were embarrassed, but he also knew the truth in their words.
Sometimes the courier cried after they had finished, though they did their best to hide it. Boone pretended not to notice. He was pretty sure they knew he was pretending, but he was also pretty sure that pointing it out would be worse than just letting it be an open secret between them. The silence between them endured, but something grew inside it and flourished. Some kind of deeper understanding.
Lily Bowen: The more the courier spoke, the more Lily made connections in her muddled mind. Of course they knew the basic layout of most vaults, they had grown up in one. Of course they were extra-sensitive to the Mojave heat, they had come to the desert from the cooler of the two coasts. Of course they'd been extra-wary around the super mutants or nightkin of Jacobstown, they had only known angry super mutants looking to grow their own numbers through any means necessary.
Their shared experience of growing up inside a vault reminded Lily of happier days, and she often asked questions about Vault 101 during the courier's stories. "Were you sweet on anyone inside your old home?" she asked, with a big smile befitting a proud grandma.
The courier blushed. "That's not very polite, Lily."
"Oh, I'm sorry, dearie."
"No, no it's okay." The courier smiled. "There was a boy who picked on me a lot, but I never figured out whether he did it because he hated me or liked me. His name was Butch. And there was Amata, my childhood friend. She was the daughter of the Overseer."
"Daughter of the Overseer?" Lily grinned. "I'm sure she was a lovely young woman."
The courier looked a little misty. "Yeah. She was. Probably still is."
Lily pulled a handkerchief that used to be a small tablecloth from inside her overalls and handed it over. "Maybe we can go back there together, pumpkin," she offered. "I always wanted to travel to the capital. We can visit your friends, see the sights."
"Yeah, maybe someday." The courier accepted the gift and blew their nose. "I've got some things I need to finish up here before I even think about wandering back east, though."
"Then let's make a list and do our chores," Lily said happily. "Number one?"
"Ohhhh, man." The courier smiled up at her. "I wouldn't even know where to start."
Raul Alfonso Tejada: Raul got a faint smile on his face whenever the courier started up like this, as if their memories reminded him of another place he had come from, another time. While they couldn't have more different backgrounds, pasts- hell, he had several hundred years on the courier, even if they shared the same road today- there was something in the description of the other roads they had walked that made him feel warm on a cold night.
"What's on your mind?" The courier asked him one night, when Raul's smile grew larger than usual.
"Nada, boss," he reassured them. "You're just a good reminder that I can change my mind about the future anytime I'd like. Tell me the one about that radio DJ again."
"Again?" The courier rolled their eyes. "Why? I could tell you a million stories about Underworld and all the ghouls that lived there, but all you want to hear about is Three Dog. You'd probably have more in common with the Underworld folks, honestly."
Raul nodded noncommittally. "SĂ­, but my favorite stories are about people who had to rise above bad situations and become someone uncommon. Anyone who's able to do that is either fighting for something great or running from something terrible. Sometimes both."
The courier shot him a skeptical look. "Three Dog's holed up in his radio station 24/7, he's not running from anything or out fighting for anything. All that stuff about 'the good fight' is a load of bull."
"Now, now, Six," Raul chastised. "Just because he looks like your average pendejo doesn't mean he isn't doing his part. You even told me his radio show is inspirational for the Capital Wasteland folks."
The courier held their hands up in the air and bobbled them, as if balancing an invisible scale. "The duality of man. Being an average pendejo, or convincing everyone around you that you aren't actually an average pendejo and can pull off miracles."
Raul laughed. "And which one are you, boss?"
"Eh, I'm still figuring it out."
Rose of Sharon Cassidy: Cass was never one for fixating on her own past, but she couldn't help but sympathize with the courier whenever they deigned to add onto their unbelievable story. It was hard enough for her to navigate her own damn life: She couldn't imagine being called upon to steer an entire area's destiny.
After another night of recalling their life inside a vault with their dad, then their unexpected loss of him right after being reunited on the surface, the courier stopped suddenly. "I'm sorry," they said.
Cass paused her swig of precious whiskey. "What?"
"I keep going on and on about my dad, and here you are not knowing what happened to yours."
"Eh." Cass took her drink and waved her hand around until the burning swallow made its way down. "S'loads of people in the wasteland without a clue what happened to their pops. I'm not special. In fact, I'd say it probably hurts a bit more, what happened with yours."
"Well, all the same." The courier sank deeper into their seat and examined their own bottle of spirits. "I feel like an open book, tonight. Anything you want to know about where I came from that I haven't already spilled?"
Cass thought for a moment. "Tribals."
"What about them?"
"Does the East Coast have them? You're not the first traveler I've met from there, but none of you have so much as mentioned any tribals out east."
"Mmm." The courier looked thoughtful. "I guess we do have them, though maybe not in the traditional sense. There's a mess of them in Point Lookout for sure, and at least one tribal group in the Capital Wasteland outright, but beyond that things are more... loose. Fewer intact families, fewer intact homes."
"Huh." Cass took another drink. "Maybe that's where my dad went."
She let the courier stew in the awkward silence for a bit before she grinned and reached out to smack them. "Just kidding. Keep going. I want to hear about that giant robot again."
Veronica Santangelo: Veronica usually sat and listened, spellbound, picturing a chapter of her order that had realized the very thing she kept trying to tell the Elders and made the ultimate sacrifice to follow their hearts anyway.
Well, maybe Elder Owyn Lyons hadn't come to the same realization as her, but he had had a change of heart that split his company and cut them off from almost everyone they had ever known. It had been five years since the High Elders had instituted radio silence toward their East Coast chapter, and so far there had been no attempts to re-establish contact.
Veronica prodded the courier for any info she could get about the Capital Wasteland Brotherhood of Steel. The courier let slip pretty early in their friendship that Elder Owyn Lyons had passed away, which wasn't unexpected. The man was 76 years old, after all. She learned on one particularly emotional night that his daughter, Elder Sarah Lyons, was also dead, something she wasn't sure even the Western Elders were aware of. That memory was clearly painful for the courier though, so Veronica didn't press for details.
"And the Enclave?" the Scribe asked one night, arms wrapped around her knees. "Are they completely gone?"
The courier grew cold. "Yes. I made sure of it."
"Right." Veronica nodded. "So the Brotherhood took over the air force base they were at. It must have been chock-full of tech and resources, if it was the Enclave's last stand."
"It was." The courier sighed and shifted in their seat. "And it woke up some of our brothers and sisters to their original mission in the Capital Wasteland. I thought maybe that selfishness had died with Liberty Prime, but... well, I didn't like it, so I left."
"Mmm, yeah." Veronica nodded again, sympathetically this time. "I know how you feel. Felt."
"Feel," the courier agreed. "I just wish there was more I could've done. Maybe there wasn't anything else, short of seizing power."
"You'd definitely get pushback for that in the Brotherhood," Veronica agreed. "But you might get that chance out here in the broader Mojave."
ED-E: At first, ED-E enjoyed the stories, trumpeting and cooing various beeps at the appropriate moments for emphasis. The one time the courier began badmouthing the Enclave, however, the eyebot waited until they had finished before playing back the first tape that Dr. Whitley had recorded before its trip.
The courier listened to the scientist's words from years ago, deflating slightly as it played out. When the tape had finished, they stood up and checked the eyebot over. "He sent you toward Navarro, huh?"
ED-E beeped affirmation, and the courier sighed. "But Navarro was already gone. I'm sorry. I guess I'm... well, me and the Brotherhood of Steel back east are responsible for your previous master's decision to send you away. Might be responsible for more, too."
ED-E beeped sadly. The courier pressed their forehead against the eyebot's metal dome in apology.
Rex: Well, surprising for most. Rex was not most. As soon as the courier got really into their recollections, Rex usually yawned and went to sleep. He stirred when he felt their hand reach down to scratch the ruff of his neck, or pat the glass dome that held his brain.
"Good dog," the courier said, through the veil of sleep. "You remind me of another pup that used to follow me around."
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ellana-ravenwood · 4 years ago
Text
Can you be friend with your husband's ex-girlfriend ? - Bruce Wayne x Fem!Reader
Synopsis : Everyone always think you and Selina Kyle don’t like each others, solely for the fact that she used to "date” your husband. But as usual in life, things are much more complicated than that...A fluffy Drabble mainly about how truly strong, Bruce and reader’s love is. 
Listen. My students were having quiet reading times, and I had a sudden burst of inspiration as one of them chose a French story in which a mother and a step-mother unite fronts to save their little magical kid (I love that story haha), and it suddenly inspired me. I LOVE Catwoman. Like. A lot. And in my head, her and Batmom have always been...Oh. No spoilers. The rest in this story ;). Hope you’ll like this little bonus story ! : 
My masterlist blog : @ella-ravenwood-archives
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“You look beautiful mom, do you have a date with father ? I thought date nights were on Thursdays.” 
You jumped a little in the air as your son’s voice resonate in the foyer. Definitely didn’t hear him, sneaky little bugger. You turn around towards him, and smile, saying : 
“It is on Thursdays, my little buddy. I’m having a girls night out, tonight.” 
“Girls night out ?” 
“Yes. You know, Cass and I are the only girls of the family. Sometimes we need to vent to our peers. Cass usually goes to see Steph and Babs, I go out with my friends.” 
You smile at him again, ruffling his hair, and he can’t help but chuckle a little bit. In recent months, Damian found that he actually loves, when the one he came to call “mom” (you), ruffled his hair. It made him feel like the little boy he was, as odd as it could sound to anyone not knowing him. 
“I didn’t know you went on such nights.” 
“I do, once a month. You just haven’t noticed because it’s usually on nights you’re out with your father rather early.” 
“I see. If it isn’t too -he hesitates- personal, can I ask with who you are going out ? Who are your friends ?” 
Your smile widens. Because just over a year back, that boy would’ve never cared about this. About who you hung out with, or about you in general. 
Ah, since he came in your life, he went a long way. The mere fact he wanted to know more about you was proof enough, and you felt absolutely touched. 
Even more so as you realized that he not only asked about your friends because he wanted to know you, but because he was a little worried about who you might spend time with, wether they’d put you in danger or not...So, oh so sweet. 
“Well, as cliche as it sounds, I’m going out with mainly other supermoms. We like to vent about...Things -you were aware that telling your son you and your friends love to vent about them wasn’t the best answer right now haha- So, Lois, you know her of course. Jon’s mom. There’s also Dinah, Connor’s mom. You saw him a few time at the Watchtower, although he’s quite younger than you so I don’t think you interact much. I bet you already know she’s Black Canary, and married to Green Arrow, I saw you snoop in your father’s files.” 
Your son’s face redden a little, but you give him a reassuring winks totally meaning : “I snooped around too”, and it makes him smile. You continue : 
“And finally there’s Diana. She’s not a mom yet, but she loooooves to listen to our stories. She’s also great at changing subjects and partying, who would’ve thought right ? I guess having thousand of years of practice helps. I’m sure you know she’s Wonder Woman eh. Oh, and of course, there’s Selina.” 
“Selina ?” 
“Yes.” 
“As in...Catwoman ?” 
“Yes ?” 
You can see your son wants to add something, and you’re pretty sure you know what it’s gonna be. But you let him ask naturally, leave him time to gather his thoughts and dare to ask. After all, you want to instal an atmosphere of trust, between you and your children. You want them to know they can always ask you anything. So you wait. Finally, Damian says : 
“Why are you meeting with this woman ? Don’t you like, hate her ?” 
"Why would I hate her ?” 
You know exactly why he’s thinking that. But you want him to elaborate, to make sense of his feelings about the subject. Simply, to talk. 
“Well...her and father used to...you know...” 
It’s not quite as formed as you were hoping for, but you do know. And at least, he tried. There was a time he would’ve just gotten mad you purposefully pretended not to understand his meaning, and would’ve left this instant.
You smile at him once more. To be honest, so many people thought you and Selina Kyle didn’t get along. 
You guess it would make sense, it’t true, she’s your husband ex after all. AND one of the only woman for whom he truly cared about. Those, were very few...
In fact, there was only three of you, in Bruce’s life, that truly made a difference. Sure, he had been infatuated before, with quite a few women. But only three, truly stood out. 
Talia Al’Ghul, of course. Not his first love (that was Julie Madison, although he was much too young to really know what love even was, and compared to you, it was just mild infatuation). But someone that used to be important nonetheless. The reason your sweet Damian (yes, sweet, especially when around you) was alive. 
She was important, once. When he was training under her father’s guidance, before he realized who Ras really was. 
Talia was a complicated woman who unfortunately could never truly get away from her upbringing, no matter how hard she tried. She was “too far gone”, by her own words. It was clear to Bruce, that if even herself thought she was un-savable, he couldn’t do much either. He did try, though. But it just never worked. 
You were certain that she left Damian in Bruce’s care, when the boy was barely ten, exactly because she didn’t want him to turn out like her. Which in itself, was a little redemption act, no ? At least, you thought so. 
Didn’t mean that you thought you could change her mind about those “world domination” plans that were ingrained in her mind since she was born. Fact is, she gave Damian a chance. 
You never hated Talia. You actually felt pretty sorry for her. 
She could’ve had such a different life, if, all those years ago, she had been able to leave her father. Not that you would want to, it’d mean that you and Bruce would never be (even if deep down, you knew that you and him would always end up together, no matter what...it would’ve just been a little lethal for you, if Talia was more around um um). 
Talia never even really tried to get “her” son back. It seemed she completely accepted to “give him” to you. She self-admittedly never really knew how to be a mother, and there was that time she had him killed because she thought it was meant to be...
Not that, anyway, you’d ever let that happen again. You made it very clear you wouldn’t. And your resolve and anger could be scary, even to Talia Al’Ghul.
Plus, the day she had Damian killed, she realized she didn’t want that...anyway long story short, she was no longer in his life. And although if one day she changed her mind and wanted to contact him again you wouldn’t oppose it, you knew Damian was yours. Everyone knew that if one day she would come back, beyond the fact you, Bruce, and his siblings would be here to protect Damian...The boy would never choose to go back to the Al Ghuls. 
He changed drastically, since he came with you. He was no longer her son. And she knew it. And didn’t interfere so far (and you knew she never would). 
He called YOU “mom”. He told YOU he loves you. You. Not her. he never interacted with you like he did with her anyway. And you still didn’t hate Talia. She was part of both Bruce, and Damian’s past (AUTHOR’S NOTE : a little reminder that Damian was born from a “test tube” with Bruce and Talia’s DNA (to simplify things), and had a surrogate mother to give birth to him (although sometimes he’s seen in literal “baby pods” like in Death Stranding haha). He was born A WHILE after Bruce left Talia and the League behind. He wasn’t born 9 months after. This is important infos so things fit timeline wise :)).
The second woman who had a great impact on your husband’s life, and who used to be “his”, was...Selina Kyle. 
For a long time Bruce felt like she was the only one to understand him. The only one accepting him for who he was, with no compromise. The only person on this Earth that wouldn’t try to change him. And although things were often “on and off”, and complicated, it was nice, to feel like he belonged. And Selina... Selina was the only one giving him this feeling. 
But...Well, he was wrong.  
Because then, you, the “third” and yet most important woman in his life, appeared. 
You arrived years after his love story with Talia, and quite a while after he started to realize him and Selina were maybe not meant to be. Too many differences, even as they understood each others (or at least he thought they did).
Then you barged in. A bit younger than him. Unafraid to be yourself, bold and utterly stubborn. Turning his world upside down, and making him reconsider if he ever knew what the word “love” meant before you.  
But that, was another story. Anyone seeing you with him, and particularly the way he looked at you, would instantly know how crazy he was about you. How desperately in love he was. 
Right now, the question wasn’t about how strong your bond was, and how he never loved anyone like he loves you. 
Nope. Right now, it was all about how you didn’t hate his exes (not even Talia). How anyway, they were part of his life at some point, that was a fact you could never change. 
Before you, Bruce had a past. Past. 
A past. A path. A path that lead him to you. A path that taught him to not make the same mistakes he made before, and a path that showed him it was you. That it has always been you. 
A past path, that couldn’t compare to his present with you. 
You didn’t even feel particularly jealous of them, you knew how Bruce felt about you, and that they were just that...part of his past. 
Now, sure. You would probably never even be friendly with Talia. Who she was and what she stood for made it so. The opposite of you, really. 
But Selina ? Well. Selina was another story. 
You smile at your son, and say : 
“Do you think of Selina and I as “conventional women” ? “
His answer came without a second of hesitation, Damian didn’t even have to think to say what he thought of your question : 
“Certainly not.” 
“Exactly. Now. Maybe society teaches girls they should instantly hate their boyfriend’s ex, but I chose not to listen. It’s a toxic view of life, and not all exes are crazy jealous psychos as the people make it sound ? Sometimes, like in your father and Selina’s case, the relationship ends on good terms. Selina is a great woman. As soon as she knew your dad and I were actually a thing, she backed off.” 
Well. That wasn’t entirely true. She backed off of Bruce. But she still LOVED driving him crazy jealous by openly flirting with you. 
“And I know how your dad feels about me. I trust him, too. Trust is important, you know that now right ? -he nods- So. Why would I hate someone I have a lot in common with, and with whom I’d probably be friend anyway if you father wasn’t in the picture ?” 
“I...I guess you wouldn’t ?” 
“And I indeed don’t.” 
Your son was visibly confused, and you couldn’t blame him really. 
Because of how the World was, but also because of who raised him (Talia was...a jealous woman), you understood how he couldn’t quite understand you not feeling threaten in the least by the fact Selina was your Broosh’s ex. So you say, kissing his forehead :
“I’ll tell you a few stories, soon. And I think you’ll get it.” 
“Ok, mom.” 
You smiled. He hadn’t call you “mom” for very long, and you quickly noticed he used every opportunity to use the word. It melted your heart. 
“Now, I have to go ! If I’m late, Diana is going to fly me out of here, and your father HATES when she does that. Goodnight baby, see you soon. Make sure to eat a proper dinner. I told Alfred but I trust you to listen. And force your dad to have one too, when I’m not here, he forgets things...even as important as literally feeding himself. Too engrossed in his project, you know. Anyway, love you. Good night !” 
“Good night, mom.” 
And with a last smile, you go out and leave behind a son that has a LOT of things to think about. 
************
A few days later, it was Damian’s mandatory night off and he was going to bed early. Your orders. You convinced him, by promising to read him a bedtime story.
Many would think your son was too proud to even admit you still read him stories before bed, even as he was approaching the age of 12. But many would be wrong. 
If there was something Damian wasn’t afraid of, it was to tell the world how much of a mamma’s boy he was. Nobody could blame him, he never really had a “real” mom. Not one like you, at least, who taught him with love and patience, and not hired assassins and blood. 
“Ok Little Buddy, what will it be tonight ?” 
"The story of how you became friend with Catwoman ?”
Your taken aback for a few seconds, you had totally forgotten about telling him about your “girls night out”. But then you smile, settle down next to him on his bed, and as he threw his heavy and comfortable quilt on both of you, you start your story. 
The day she saved your life. 
The first time you realized you and Selina could very well become friends one day, was that time she literally saved your life. Definitely a hint that she didn’t hate you, at least. 
And you ? Sure, at first you were a little insecure because you knew she was Bruce’s ex and Selina was...Well she was a gorgeous woman, smart, witty, and very VERY hot. 
But after seeing her a few times there and there, and seeing how she interacted with Bruce...you knew Selina Kyle was not the “home wrecker” time. That she would never try anything with him, as long as she knew you two were a thing. 
Sure she was a thief, unscrupulously taking whatever she wanted from whomever she wanted...but “someone else’s man” was definitely where she drew a limit. She felt absolutely no pleasure being a mean spirited person. 
And she saw how happy Bruce was with you...Which lead to that fateful night during which you two started to get closer. 
Because sure, you fought off your insecurities about her being his ex, but you weren’t exactly friendly. You just...knew of each others. 
The change happened not long after Bruce made it official with the media that he was no longer “Gotham’s most eligible bachelor”, and was in a serious relationship with you. 
To your surprise, the people in the city took it really well. Bruce was a beloved figure, they were happy that after years of clearly love life instability, he found someone. Sure, a few women and men had their heart broken, their dreams shattered, and were totally jealous of you but...
Anyone seeing you with him just instantly knew you guys were the real deal. That it was true love, as cheesy as it sounded. It was just that obvious. 
Maybe too obvious. 
Clearly, soon, everyone in Gotham knew how much Bruce Wayne cared about his girlfriend. How he would do anything for her. And...Well. 
This was Gotham. Do you get the picture ? 
It was a time during which you hadn’t moved in with him just yet. You’d do that only a few months later, not long before you and Bruce would adopt Dick. 
But for now, you still had your studio apartment in the heart of Gotham (refusing to take any handouts from Bruce, who could definitely get you a better place), and you were going back there after a few meeting with your publishers. 
You were suppose to meet Bruce the next day, as tonight, he was working on some important “Batcases”. You didn’t mind too much. Sometimes, it was nice to be alone with yourself, gave you a moment of self-care and calm. 
You loved Bruce of course, and loved being with him, but it was still nice to have some alone time nonetheless. 
Anyway. You were walking back, feeling rather good about the bath bomb that was waiting for you back home (it was from your favorite artisanal shop, a gift from Bruce, who definitely had no qualms buying you hundreds of dollars worth of bath bombs haha...If he couldn’t help you get a better apartment, didn’t mean he wasn’t gonna spoil you otherwise). 
That’s when it happened. You never even saw it coming. One second you were walking down the street, the next you had a damp towel around your mouth and nose, and everything went to black. 
************
You woke up in a warehouse. By the salty smell in the air though, you guessed you were somewhere on the docks. Which didn’t tell much, there was a lot of docks, in Gotham. Perks of living on a city with a seafront view ?
There was a group of men in a corner, playing cards. In front of you, a camera. You were gagged, your arms and legs were bound, and your head hurt like hell. 
“Hey, she woke up.”  
A shuffling to your side. The men playing cards were moving. They came to you, one turned the camera on. The other one put on some headphones and slowly directed a mic towards you, as the last man pulled on a ski mask and settled in front of the camera. 
Nothing made sense to you. Until the man in front of the camera started to talk. 
“Bruce Wayne. We have your girlfriend. If you don’t bring us-” 
Oh. Oh. You were kidnapped. And those men wanted a ransom. An insane amount of money. That you knew Bruce had, but still. Ah. 
You had to get out of here. You had to. 
You looked around you, nothing. And there were the three men. Oh. Oh but the edges of your chair were sharp. And if you slowly made a back and forth movement with your wrists, you could see it slowly cutting the ropes. And so, you got to work.  
Only...
“Believe me, we won’t hesitate to hurt her. Here, a proof of “good faith”.”
Huh ? OUTCH ! The man in front of the camera had just almost knocked you out with the force of his punch in your jaw. You were wondering if he hadn’t broken it. You couldn’t quite think anymore, and could feel the tears slowly falling on their own from your eyes... 
Damn, it hurt. You didn’t see it coming either, too focused on slowly cutting the ropes while making sure they didn’t notice. 
“Ok, I think that’s good. Whaddaya think, Rupert ?”
“We can do another take if you want, and then edit the punch in ? I’m not sure she can handle another hit like that, she looks pretty shaken up.” 
“Ah well we-”
“Oooooh booyyys !” 
Your ears were ringing, everything was blurry, and your head hurt so much. But you definitely recognized that voice. 
“Catwoman, you’re early.” 
Huh ? What was she doing here... 
“Well, I thought I’d pop in a little earlier knowing you boys would be around. I’m sort of in a hurry. I accept cash of course, as usual. I think you’ll find the array of jewelries I brought today to be...What the hell are you doing ?”
“Mm ? Oh, her ? A little side operation. She’s Bruce Wayne’s sweetheart. Rumors has it he’d burn the world for her, we thought we’d take advantage of it and expend our business.” 
“That’s quite a jump from fencing stolen jewelries, to kidnapping, isn’t it ?” 
The man shrugged, and turned back to you. 
“Well, you don’t achieve anything if you don’t start new ventures. And there’s big money to be made here. For sure. That idiot Wayne will pay up, there’s no doubt.” 
You heard the click-clacks of heels, and a shadow came into your vision. 
“What did you do to her, you animals ?” 
“Just a punch. And maybe we weren’t too delicate with her when we moved her to our van, and then here. But it’s fine. Nothing too bad really.” 
Slowly you were regaining your vision. And the pain was retrieving. You had never been punched before. You kinda hope it would never happen again... 
The way those thugs were talking about the all thing was so casual, from them talking about how they’d edit the video destined to Bruce, to how they were just saying they were expanding their operation...For a little bit, you almost forgot you were from Gotham.
Gotham. 
America’s capital of crime. 
Where little thugs like those ones were plenty. 
Men who thought they could “make it big”.
Gotham.
A place that bred someone like your Bruce, and his nightly activities... 
Selina’s voice raised again, harsh and dry : 
“I give you all the things I stole in the past month, in exchange of her.” 
There’s a short silence, followed by a chuckle from one of the man, clearly the leader, who answers : 
“Oh please. We ain’t stupid. We know her value. And we know someone like you, wouldn’t trade anything in for her if she wasn’t valuable. You’re not exactly known to be a nice woman.” 
There’s a hint of anger crossing Selina’s face, and you immediately understand where it comes from. Sure. She was a thief. A criminal. And sometimes, she’d rough up some security guards, or some fellow criminals that think they could cross her. 
But she was no brute. 
She would never NEVER kidnap anyone, and especially not an innocent. 
She protected children, and defenseless woman in her neighborhood, and whenever she could. She wasn’t exactly a hero, like Bruce; That’s for sure. But she wasn’t a bad person. No. She wasn’t. 
And those guys words ? Just infuriated her. 
“Mm. Too bad for you. Don’t go out and say I didn’t give you a chance. Really, too bad. I liked doing business with you.” 
“What are you-”
In an instant, Selina sprout in action, and knocked the three men out before they could even realize. That was impressive. Even gagged, you could hear yourself utter a “wow” as she rushed back to you to untie you. 
She smiled as she saw you made a good way through the ropes, and were most likely be able to get out of your bounds at some point. You were glad you didn’t though, because you weren’t quite sure what you were going to do once free ? 
You fall forward on the floor and she catches you. Your head is still ringing, as you look at Selina. 
There is genuine concern on her face. 
How odd. 
"Are you okay ?” 
“Yes, I’m fine.” 
“Good. Cause I refuse to be the one telling Bruce the person he loves the most in this world died. Again.” 
“Yes. Thank you I-I...”
“Hey, are you okay ? (Y/N) ? (Y/N) ??” 
You could hear Selina call to you, and it felt like her voice was slowly fading into the distance...The adrenaline gone, the stress of it all gone, you had simply passed out. 
************
“Is she alright ?!” 
Bruce arrived, bursting through a window, and ran to you. Your head was in Selina’s lap (she felt bad just leaving you laying down there on the hard concrete ground), and she was casually sitting, her back against a container. 
She was surrounded by the knocked out bodies of your aggressors. 
“Yes. Yes she’s just sleeping. She got roughed up a little bit, but I checked. Nothing too bad. It’ll leave a few bruises. Nothing time cannot heal.” 
After saving you, totally by chance, Selina called Bruce on his red phone, so he would know it’s an emergency. 
It didn’t even take him more than ten minutes to drop the case he was working on, cross town, and arrive. 
He kneeled next to you, and checked every part of you to make sure Selina was right. But it did appear you were just asleep. The shock was too big, probably. 
“How did you know she was here ?” 
“I didn’t. It was all luck. Those men were some...um...Associates of mine.” 
“You have associates that kidnap women ?” 
There was anger in Bruce’s voice, but Selina knew better than to think it was aimed at her. No. It was anger he felt towards those men who hurt you, and towards himself, too, as he wasn’t there to take care of you. 
“No. She’s their first.” 
He looks at you, with a longing and love in his eyes that he never looked at Selina with. She recognizes it instantly. He’s more in love with you than he ever been with her. Was it even really love, between them, or a strong friendship ? Sometimes, the two were difficult to dissociate.
She stares at him, because it’s quite something, to see the Batman himself so desperately in love that he dropped everything he was doing to run to you, knowing that you were safe. 
It’s quite something, to see the Batman himself ready to give it all up just for one person. Something he was never willing to do before. Never willing to do with Selina... 
She stares at him, and smiles. An almost sad smile, because it hurts a bit, he never looked at her like that. But a smile nonetheless, because she knows now for sure, that he found his true love. 
Nobody would peg Catwoman for a romantic, but oh, oh she was a hopeless sap. Especially when it touched her dear friends. 
Bruce looks at her, and mistakes that look in her eyes for something that isn’t there. She can see it instantly. He thinks she’s sad, that she’s truly hurt he found someone else. That he moved on. 
She’s not. But of course, he would think so. 
“Selina I-”
“Don’t Bruce. It’s ok. You and I were never meant to be together, and we knew it. Doesn’t mean we can’t be friend. I actually think we work better, as friends, don’t you ? Take care of her. She’s definitely a keeper.” 
You slowly shift in Bruce’s arms, and he takes a look at you. At your wounds. His heart tightens, and he holds you with more force. 
“Thank you.” 
He barely whispers it, but Selina hears him. She smiles at him, happy that her friend found happiness. True happiness. 
All she ever wanted for Bruce, was for him to find a way to be happy. Clearly, she wasn’t that. But you...You definitely were. 
“I don't know what I would’ve done if she...” 
“Hey, hey come on Bat. Don’t think about this. She’s fine. Just tired from the shock. She’ll recover, she’s strong. And you’ll be here, right ?” 
“...Yes.” 
He didn’t sound too convince, and Selina could feel a big urge to slap him across the face. Because she knew what he was thinking. And he’d better not do it. 
“Bruce if you-”
“Thank you, Selina. I’m going to take her home, now. She needs the rest. And-And I do too.” 
And on that note, he exited the warehouse, holding you tight in his arms. And oh. Oh Selina hoped to everything she held sacred (and that wasn’t a lot of things) that he wouldn’t be a stupid idiot. 
The day she saved his heart. 
He couldn’t stop thinking of that time you got hurt. Because of him. Because he was Bruce Wayne...What if anyone got wind that he was Batman ? 
It’d be even worst. If someone like the Joker, or Penguin ever knew who he really was (and that was definitely a possibility), being with you would sign your death. 
He had to-
“Oh god Bruce you are SO cliche.” 
He slightly jumped in the air as Selina casually sat down beside him, looking down to the dark streets below. There was a slight fog, and she couldn’t help but roll her eyes at how even the weather decided to join in ont he stereotype. 
“Excuse me ?” 
“You’re a living cliche. What, brooding all alone on a rooftop, on a full moon night, wondering if you should ruin your life or not, sacrifice your own happiness for dumb reasons.” 
“What ?” 
“What, breaking up with her to protect her ? Really ? Do you even know how dumb that sounds ?” 
“I didn’t-”
“Your thoughts are plain to see. I know you, Bruce. And I noticed your face, ever since she got hurt. And what you’re thinking? Leaving her for her own safety ? D-U-M-B. So dumb.”
“Did you not pay attention to the close call she just had ?!” 
“I was there to save her. And if I wasn’t, you would’ve barged in and save her. Or better yet, when I arrived, she had made her way half way through her bounds by slowly cutting it on the edge of her chair ! She might’ve escaped on her own !”
“Or gotten killed.” 
“But she’s alive.”
“No thanks to me.” 
“So what, you renounce happiness because maybe one day she’ll be in danger ? This is Gotham, Bruce. She is always in danger. And if you leave her alone, like I know you’re thinking about, she will definitely be an easy target. It’s not because you break up with her that people will stop thinking you care about her. In fact, after she got attacked like that, and it was made public, I bet the opposite will happen. Criminals in Gotham are a lot of things, but dumb is unfortunately not one of them. They WILL come after you if you leave her to fend for herself. If you break up.” 
“You don’t know that.” 
“I do know that. Come on Bruce. I was born here. You too. And her too. Hell, I saw her give a nasty right hook to more than one person, in the short time I’ve known her ! One of those being Mayor Hady himself, and that was BEFORE she started to date you, how fearless is she, huh ?” 
“That’s the problem.”
“Her fearlessness ? Sounds to me like it to be taken advantage of. Train her. Teach her to fight, to defend herself. Give her the keys, to survive. Just like you gave yourself the keys to go on your “justice” mission.” 
“I...I can’t.”
“Why ?” 
“Because she...She shouldn’t live this kind of life.” 
“A little late, no ? She knows who you really are already. And she stayed. Even then, shouldn’t this be her own choice ? Shouldn’t she decide on what she deserves ?” 
“Selina-” 
“Nu-hu. Don’t start with this. You tried to do the same with me, and I didn’t have the patience to stay. But I know she does. I know you can try to push her through the front door, she’ll climb through the window. She, unlike me or anyone else, will see right through your bullshit. Does, see right through your bullshit. And is willing to put up with it...You’ll never find someone else who does.” 
“I know...”
“Then, what are you doing ?”
And with that, Selina rolled her eyes, grumbled something about him being a stubborn idiot, said : “think of her feelings for once, and not your own. Because you damn well know Bruce, that if you leave her, it will be out of selfishness, not because you think it’s truly the only way.”, and jumped from the building to the one next door, leaving Bruce with too many thoughts and dilemmas...
Even if in the end, the answer became obvious to him.   
************
“As if I would ever let that happen anyway.” 
“I’m sorry ?” 
Years later, Bruce told you the story of how he almost broke up with you not long after you two moved in together, shortly before you adopted Dick. 
“She was right you know ? I would’ve climbed through the window. See. If I knew for sure you were leaving me because you didn’t love me, then I would leave you alone of course. But I would’ve definitely called your bluff.” 
“How can you be so sure ?” 
He smiles fondly at you, bringing you into a warm embrace as you roll your eyes at him. Ah but of course, even him always knew you could see right through him, even when he tried to hide his emotions. 
“Please, Bruce. You can’t fool me. You were never able to, and I don’t think you’ll ever learn to. Or I’ll just learn your new tricks, and crack you anyway. And believe me, if you had tried to leave me at that time...I wouldn’t’ve let that happen.” 
He lays his forehead on yours, unable to say another word. Tonight, he was able to tell you this story that was now “silly”, but that almost tore his heart away from him. 
Because if he had lose you to his own stupidness, he would’ve become just an empty shell. Back to those dark days of loneliness, and acting like a machine while his entire soul was hurting. 
Sure. Now this story sounded silly. But oh, oh if he had gone through with it. If-
“I’ll have to thank Selina though. Because she avoided me going through the trouble of drilling into your thick skull that it’s ok to be happy. And be afraid for those you love. Especially in your situation...” 
“I know.” 
He holds you tighter. Just as every time he realizes how lucky he is to have another shot at this “family” thing. How lucky he is, that you’re here, with him. 
And Selina was truly to thanks for that, in a way. 
Because, you were almost sure you could’ve change his mind and not break up with you. But there was this slight possibility, this slight one you’d fail...
Maybe you would’n’t’ve been able to convince him to stay with you. Maybe. There was still a chance, right ? So you’re thankful. Your thankful for having such a good friend. For having Selina in your life. 
You’re thankful that one day, a stupid mistake you made truly started this dear friendship. 
The day she became a friend. 
You had always been quite a “lone wolf” sort of person. So you didn’t have a lot of friends. Your childhood best friend, Alex, had moved across the country years ago. And making new friends as the wife of Bruce Wayne was hard. 
This was a time BEFORE you met the others from the League. BEFORE any of them knew the Batman had a family. 
Of course, before introducing you to them, he had to make sure things were safe. That they could be trusted (A/N : if you wanna see the day he does trust them, here’s the story I wrote about it haha : “You have kids ?? And
A WIFE ?”). 
So, you didn’t have many friends. And sometimes...You wished you did. 
Someone that wasn’t your Broosh. Or your kid. Or Alfred. 
You told everything to Bruce, but sometimes...Well sometimes certain issues, you couldn’t talk to him about. Like for example the time he annoyed the hell out of you. Sure you’d tell it to his face, and you guys would fight, then work it out, and finally  make up, and you didn’t want to bring back the issues you know ? You wouldn’t vent to him about him, eh ?
Bruce was definitely your best friend. But he was also the man you loved. And sometimes, it was nice to have an “outside” perspective. 
Someone with whom you could gossip a little (although you did gossip plenty with your husband, when at charity balls and galas). 
And then, slowly, you realized what you actually were feeling...
Selina. 
You were missing her. 
It had been a little while since the last time you saw her. 
Ever since she saved your life, and knocked some sense in your Broosh, whenever you saw her, you’d have such a interesting and compelling conversations. 
It was oh so pleasant, to gang up on Bruce and make fun of him. His pride was always hit, and he’d frown in such a delightful way. 
At the same time, she knew him rather well, and you knew him rather well, and you three had a lot in common and it sometimes felt like you were a trio from a very cliched “chosen one” story. 
Hermione, Ron, Harry. 
Percy, Annabeth, Grover. 
Any trio really. It even inspired some of your stories. Yet...Yet you wouldn’t call her quite a “friend”. Why that ? 
You weren’t sure. It just was never made official, and in your anxiety riddled mind it meant that you weren’t friends, then. 
Yet you missed her. And earlier in the day, you saw something that made you want to call her and talk to her about it ! 
Should you call her ? Send a text ? You had her number. She once wrote it on a napkin and slipped it in your pocket right in front of Bruce, just to mess with him. You kept it, and put it in your phone, not really knowing why. 
Taking your phone, you started to draft a text (it had to be drafted before being send, it you were even going to send it...your anxiety made it so that even with texts, you had to make sure you didn’t sound stupid or such). 
You didn’t really have any intention to send it. You were just toying with a few ideas when...
No. Oh no. 
Oh fuck. No. No no no no no no. 
Instead of hitting the “back” key to erase the text for good and move on from this weird move, you pressed “send”. Shit. Fuck. Motherfucker. 
It was such a dumb text as well. 
“Hey girlfriend, wanna hang out ?” 
You were just trying out different ways of writing a text, and were entering “stupid silly mode”, which was the step right before you usually gave up and didn’t send something (you had MANY of those moments when starting to date Bruce...Moments during which you almost send some really sappy and silly texts, making the mistakes a few time to indeed press “send”...mortifying...why, why were you never learning from your mistakes ?!). 
You were in your office, in the Wayne Inc building (you settled your writing office there, so it was more convenient to see your Bruce, but also to handle taking care of your son, Dick), downright panicking about this stupid text, when you heard a knock on your door. 
How long had you been beating yourself down about this ? AN HOUR ?! Damn. Anxiety never let you keep track of time. You-
“Hey...girlfriend.”
Bollocks. 
It was her. Selina. And you could hear her smug smile in her voice. You were facing your windows, not wanting to turn around, and it was getting a little awkward. Selina broke the silence : 
“Listen, I thought you did want to hang out and was just making an inside joke by being overly girly, you know, imitating those models Bruce used to date ? But I realize maybe this was um, a mistake ?” 
She sounds so unsure. You never heard her sound unsure before ! So you turn around, and here she is, a little shy. 
Catwoman. A little shy ? 
And all of a sudden, you realize she must’ve felt the same about you. Consider you a friend, but since you never talked about it never took it for granted, for something sure, settled in stone ? 
And your text maybe confirmed you were, indeed, friends ? 
And here it was. 
From that day, and on. 
The official beginning of your friendship. 
Of course, you both saw the other as a friend since a while before, but it’s with this embarrassing text that it really changed everything. 
Made it “official”. 
Made it clear to the both of you. 
It never occurred to you that Selina too, could sometimes have insecurities and be anxious. But that day, as she shyly responded to your call, hopeful it meant you were really friends...
Being her, it was also hard to make friend. 
She had been friend with Bruce for a long time. The fact she was yours now too, filled her with joy. Because she really liked the both of you, in the most platonic way that ever existed. 
Yes. Her and Bruce worked better as friends anyway. 
Ah. But wasn’t this how the best friendship started ? With a push from fate, a little awkwardness, and a lot of laughter once the initial shock passed ? 
Girls night out. 
It happened a day during which you, Dinah and Lois were...not in a great mood. 
Your husbands were aggravating, your children got into troubles and shenanigans, you had so much to do...it was a lot of stress, and it was all released at the same time. 
You all left your house yelling that you “needed air”, and left behind rather stunned husbands and children. Ah but yes, everything wasn’t always perfect, even amongst loving families.
And your first reflex ? To call each others. 
That’s it. That’s how girls night out started. The realization sometimes you needed to wind down with some friends. But quickly, you realized that the three of you talked mainly about your kids and husbands, and by extension, the “superhero work”. Which was fine, you needed to vent but...It wasn’t helping you relieve some tension. 
And that’s when you got an idea. 
Who better than Selina Kyle to make you NOT talk about your families ? 
You joined in a bar every first Wednesday of the month, starting at happy hours for you, Dinah and Lois. Ranting about your families, and about annoying habits your husbands had etc etc...And then you were joined a bit later in the evening by Selina and Diana. 
And that’s when the fun really began. 
It became a ritual. 
Girls night out (A/N : maybe I should write a story about that one day haha). 
This was one such night, and you had let lose a little bit more than usual because...for the first night in nine months, you could drink a little bit of alcohol. 
Alcohol had never been your thing, but a sweet cocktail there and there was nice. Now, while being pregnant with your youngest, Thomas, obviously you weren’t going to do that. 
And you had missed a few “girls night out” because you were too damn pregnant. 
But now, he was OUT, and you were TOO. 
Well. Diana said something like that, as she kept giving you more and more cocktails. 
Long story short, you were a little tipsy. And definitely not able to drive. And so here was your savior, Selina. 
She didn’t really drink, knowing you would totally let loose. So she drove you home. 
You were coming back a little later than usual, and you had forgotten to send a little text to Bruce to tell him so so he wouldn’t worry (Selina did it for you though, true friend had your back eh ? And she definitely didn’t want the Batman to come barge in on your girls night fun). 
He opened the door as you walked up the stairs, saying bye to Selina. She had that smirk on her face, the one you knew she always had when about to tease your beloved husband. And as he slipped an arm around your waist, and turned to wave goodbye to her...She did just that : 
“Careful Bat, I’m making good progress with her. If you’re not wary enough, I’ll steal her from you.” 
On that note, Selina winks at the both of you, puts on her sunglasses (while it was night...Oh Selina), and drives away, smiling widely of that very Catwomanesque smug smile. Which makes you chuckle. She always made you laugh rather easily. 
You turn to your bruce and...
Oh. That adorable “jealous frown” got you every time. Your smile shifts from amused to utterly affectionate, and you put your hands on his cheeks. 
He was looking at Selina’s car fading into the distance, the arm he had around you tightening slightly (you were pretty sure he wasn’t even consciously doing it). Your hands on his cheeks didn’t seem to register in his mind. 
So a further distraction was needed. You brush your lips against his cheek, as an attempt to drive his attention back to you and...it works. 
You smile at him, and in your little hazy state you whisper in his ear : 
“I love you, my Broosh.” 
He can’t help but feel a surge of warm feelings towards you, and bring you in a tight hug. Partly because he can’t help it, partly because he’s trying to hide the slight blush growing on his face whenever you surprise him with “I love yous”, and that always made him snicker at him...Only you could fluster him so. 
“I love you too.” 
You tripped on air, as, once again, you were a little tipsy, and he catches you...Good, he needed an excuse to carry you bridal style anyway. 
He always liked doing so, any excuse to have you near really. And as your face approach for a loving kiss you-
************
“Wait wait wait mooooom !! You don’t have to leave this gross part in !” 
“What gross part ?” 
“The sappy declaration of love, and the kiiiisses !!” 
“Oh ? But don’t every story have to end with a kiss ? And a happy ever after ?” 
“Nu-huh ! Also HEY ! None of your stories end like this, I know, I read them all !”
You chuckle slowly at your boy’s reaction, and kiss him on the forehead. Quite touched he read all your stories. 
“Time for bed, little buddy.” 
You say, slipping out of his quilt and tucking him in. You can see he pensively thinks about your little friendship story, and finally he says : 
“I’ll try to be nicer to Miss Kyle. I never trusted her, because of her past with father. But maybe she deserves a chance ?” 
“She does.” 
“If you say so, then I believe it.” 
It touches you, how much blind faith your son puts in you. You smile, giving him another kiss to his forehead, as he says : 
“Thank you for telling me the story, mom. It was nice.” 
Behind this “it was nice”, there isn’t just the story itself, but the knowledge that as you grow up...Your feelings change. 
You change. 
And you go through a lot of heartaches, before finally finding the right persons to surround yourself with. 
Beyond the story itself, Damian related to how it took both you and Bruce a lot of trials and errors, before finding each others. How you loved before you met the other, but it never compared to how you love each others. 
How you found good friends along the way, and how even when things sounded desperate and lonely...you made it through. 
So he could certainly do so, too ? Even more so since now, he was a big brother. 
Thomas was barely a few weeks old, but Damian had already taken his role very seriously. And you knew he was going to continue to grow, to love, to hurt too sometimes...and to evolve. 
Just like you and Bruce did. 
So. No. You didn’t hate Selina Kyle just because she and your husband used to be a thing. In fact...
In fact, Selina had become both of your best friend. Unfortunately for Bruce, she often took your side on everything, and LOVED to drive him crazy by openly flirting with you. 
And she had been by your side through many good moments, and bad ones. The first to respond when your family needed it. The one you’d always be there for, and vice versa. 
A best friend. 
Quite an important find. 
When you met Bruce, not only did you meet the love of your life, but also one of your best and most precious friend. 
Conclusion : is it possible to be friend with your husband’s ex ? Absolutely. 
Especially when that “ex” was someone as extraordinary as Selina Kyle, and when the love that linked you and your husband was so impossible to even graze. 
__________________________________________________
And yet another bonus story that I had no intention to write but suddenly felt the need to haha. Don’t worry, the rest of the stories I announced are still coming ;). I guess there’s nothing bad in having little bonus ones in between hehe. I hope you liked this, again it’s just a little drabble.
As usual comments and reblogs are always greatly appreciated and motivating <3.
PS : I wrote this, like all drabbles, in like thirty minutes. Didn’t re-read. Sorry for any typos. Don’t hesitate to point any huge ones to me, Ill change it x_x. 
2K notes · View notes
denkineptune · 4 years ago
Text
mha date headcanons- boys and girls :))
♡ request: “i love ur blog already, ur writing is so good!!! im so excited to see the content u’ll be posting !! :D since ur taking requests, how abt some date headcanons for the mha boys (or girls if u want!) ?” - @dianangels​ 
♡ thank you for letting me write girls aaa i chose to do some as first date hc. it was kinda hard to keep jirou’s gn because i wanted to reference wlw stereotypes but i succeeded in gender-neutral because i want everyone to be able to enjoy
♡ dedicating part of this to @anxious-botanist​ because she’s the one who inspired the momo cuddles hehe sorry it took so long
♡ fic details: headcanons, fluff, gender-neutral reader, 2nd pov
characters: kaminari, amajiki, jirou, ashido, yaoyorozu
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kaminari- arcade
↠AR C ADE   DA T  E
↠you hear me??? arcade!! date!! ideal man, right here, someone claim him immediately or else i will be forced to take ownership
↠he’s super laid back and chill, pretty childish at heart. he only means the best, though, so i think an arcade is exactly what he would go for when taking you on a date! he doesn’t have a lot of money but still wants you to go home with something to remember the date by
↠he buys like $50 worth of tokens and splits it between the two of you, making sure that he tells you which games give the most tickets, because he’s definitely been here enough times to remember
↠his favorite game is either crossy roads or the big bass wheel- he loves crossy roads because of how cute the style is, but also there is impending stress and levels of  d o o m  as you progress further. big bass wheel is basically just gambling, and i think he’s yumeko jabami.
↠he hacks games to make you win sometimes,, his quirk is bascially designed to do this. it’s like he was born just to take you out on this arcade date. he uses his quirk to short circuit the game and trick the computer into giving you hundreds of tickets
↠he just wants to make you happy and see you smile!! there’s not a feeling quite like succeeding at something as silly as an arcade game, but there’s a certain pride to it that he loves seeing on your face. 
↠kaminari only does it a few times, since he knows that you should be earning your prizes ((not that you know when he does it, he’s really cheeky about it))
↠playyyy multiplayers with him! he loves DDR (dance dance revolution)- you do multiple rounds and are equally exhausted by the end of it akdflad you may not be good, and tbh neither is denki, but you still have fun, which is what matters
↠he also loves taking photobooth pictures, he puts on the most horrendous filters and does the dumbest poses, but it’s so adorable. he does the typical one smile, one “serious”, one silly face, one kith > <
↠kami gets cocky,,, it’s just how he is,, he gets overly confident whether or not he’s been on a winstreak
“heyy, y/n! look at my speedrun on this, i’m getting so many tickets, i’ll be able to get a house by the end of it!”
↠and then he CAN’T because he doesn’t get the jackpot eghgdhgeh
↠by the end of the day, you’ve spent hours at the arcade, laughing and screaming with denki as you terrorize the small children. yes, he’s that kind of guy
↠by “terrorize”, i don’t mean like a bully, but he’s unintentionally intimidating kids with his pockets overflowing with ticket chains, a crazed look on his face as he goes absolutely ham on the shooting games
↠there’s electricity coming off of him, kids sometimes have to dodge it when passing by
↠so anyways, by the end of the date, you’re basically being kicked out of the arcade, because, as kami puts it,
“we were here when it opened and i’ll be damned if we’re not here when it closes,”
↠between the two of you, you’ve aquired tens of thousands of tickets??? the employees probably hate y’all, they had to count those beasts of ticket rolls you’ve accumulated during the 10 hours the arcade was open
↠exactly 62,069 tickets (69 go brrr- kaminari’s brain), and you can basically buy the arcade with that currency
↠but here’s the thing: he lets you spend all of it. you heard me, all. of. it. he just wants to see you happy, and the best way he can think of to get a final glorious memory of your smile is to let you spend the tickets as you see fit, this generosity just to see you glowing as you walk out of the building, arms chock full of amazing junk
↠but of course, you’d feel bad if you spent all of it, especially since he was the one who took you out, so you offered him the half of the tickets that were won
“denki, you won most of these with your amAzINg gaming skills, it’s only fair you get to have something too,”
“my prize will be seeing you- your- your-- aw fuck, i forgot the line, it’ll come back to me, just give me a minute.”
↠he tried to be smooth and it failed, but you chuckled at the attempt, so all around, he considered it a success
↠denki gets a lot of dumb things that will probably end up being thrown away soon, but he also gets you a very soft bat stuffed animal that you should treasure and keep forever 
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amajiki- a walk and picnic in a japanese garden
↠tamaki is very shy, very socially anxious. he’s the kind to wait for people to leave a section of a store before he goes there, purposely do his errands in the early morning to limit social interaction, and find any excuse to leave a situation. which, tbh, isn’t that all of us?
↠let’s be honest here, if it wasn’t y’alls first date, he’d probably not go anywhere. as long as he’s with you, he doesn’t really care for anything too fancy
↠but he’s convinced himself that he needs to do something reasonably big for your first date to make sure you don’t regret your decision to go out with him. so instead of deciding to stay in, he goes somewhere that’s only slightly anxious for him, but where he still feels comfortable
↠so he’s decided on a japanese tsukiyama garden! these places are beautiful by design, not cheap but not too expensive, and people are obligated by rules to be quiet and keep their hands to themselves
↠nobody goes to a garden to socialize, in fact, i’d argue most people go just to look around, rest, and clear their heads. there’s usually not any screaming children, no quirk usage, no villains, it’s a little safe haven. 
↠bonus: there’s butterflies :))
↠it’s so peaceful, and he gets to focus on you instead of whatever loud noise is making him anxious
↠he brings a picnic basket filled with all your favorite foods, and his! he makes a show out of displaying what he can manifest with different snacks, making a point to eat edible seeds so he can produce flowers for you đŸ„șđŸ„șđŸ„ș
↠you walk around the garden for a few hours, marveling at the decor and how well-maintained everything is. there’s a koi pond, hanging wisteria trees, and multiple gazebos that create a really comfortable and calm environment
↠speaking of koi ponds, amajiki offers to buy you food so you can feed the fish! you stand on a bridge above the pond, sharing the container with him. the sMILE on his face when he watches you throw the food is so pure i’m-
↠he’s the walking embodiment of “uwu”- his face is so calm and his eyes are shining and he can feel his heart swelling with love i am GOING to cry my eyes out 
↠but honestly, he wishes he could stay in this moment forever- you’re happy, he’s happy, and it feels like you two are the only people in the universe. right now, he doesn’t have to worry about school, villain attacks, his future, or anything that makes him anxious; all that he can see right now is how beautiful and at peace you look. he took you out today, and you’re enjoying yourself. this is one of the few things that makes him confident: knowing that he’s able to make you happy
↠tamaki is silently celebrating; you’ve had a good time and he didn’t freak out, so it’s the best possible scenario!
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ashido- rollerskating! ((look at her she’s adorable the smile n the eyes aaa))
↠mina is a very energetic and bubbly person, its quite obvious if you’ve spent any amount of time around her
↠for your first date with her, she’d already have a location in mind!!
↠the atmosphere of rollerskating rinks is so electric, she can’t help but feel happy there, and she wants to experience that lovely feeling with you, too :))
↠you enter the rink, and mina is already borderline bouncing off the walls alskdfj
↠whether or not you’ve ever skated before, ashido is super cautious with you- multiple times she’s fallen on her butt while learning how to skate, so unless you’re a pro, she’s watching your every move to make sure you don’t get hurt
“y/n! please be careful- you’re not getting hurt on my watch!”
↠she jabs a thumb in her direction proudly, with the cutest bigass grin on her face awh đŸ„șđŸ„șđŸ„șshe’s really enthusiastic about sharing one of her passions with you
“try to balance, alright? don’t put too much weight on your heel or toes, because then you’ll fall on your butt. here, take my hand and i’ll help you! hey, there you go, you’re doing great!”
↠she pays for everything and will WRESTLE you if you try to disagree aldkfa if you’re the type of person to pay for everything as well, y’all are going to have to fight; mina will not give up
↠ashido comes here a lot, so she’s friendly with all the employees, she has the uncanny ability to make friends wherever she goes ((i mean she’s friends with bakugou,, if she can do that,, she can do anything))
↠she takes one of your hands and backs onto the rink, watching for anyone behind her. once you’re balanced properly, she shows you how to move your feet so that the two of you are in sync
↠skating isn’t super hard to figure out, it’s mostly intuitive, so you’ll get the hang of it quite quickly!! maybe you’re not too fast, but it’s still fun, so it doesn’t matter
↠while you’re moving with care, making sure to focus on your footwork, mina will definitely take the chance to show off her skating skills! she’s moving like crazy, weaving around other people and nearly toppling them over but shh she’s trying to impress you and if i’m being honest??? she’s really fucking good aldkdf 
↠it’s obvious that she loves this hobby, and the fact that she likes you enough to share it with you on your first date is so adorable aaaa
↠mina’s really agile- you don’t know if that’s all the hero training or just something that comes naturally, but the way she moves makes skating look like the easiest goddamn thing in the world-
↠she’s such a romantic, she’s definitely put in a request for the dj to play your favorite song, no matter if it fits the mood or not
↠heavy rock? sure!! as long as you’re having fun, who cares about what other people think? super vulgar rap?? w h y  n o t ? !
↠she just has that extroverted, positive, charming energy that’s infectious
↠you can’t help but feel at ease around her, she’s a genuinely a great person, and what you think the epitome of a hero is
↠all ashido really wants here is to have fun with you- i mean she really likes you, and hopes that she’ll get to go on another date w/ you, so she’s doing everything in her power to woo u
↠and you’d be lying if you said it wasn’t working đŸ„ș👉👈
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jirou- hanging out in her room
↠kyouka jirou, being the more introverted person she is, wouldn’t really want to go somewhere super public, like mina would
↠i also believe that she’d want to be friends (or at least acquaintances) with you before asking you on a date- she’s easily annoyed by people, so i think that she’d need to be comfortable around you if she was to be romantically interested 
↠and you’ve ticked all these boxes! you understand her sarcastic, blunt personality, and find it pretty amusing. beyond all that, she’s kind and caring, and deep down, she aspires to be a hero for all the right reasons. who wouldn’t love her for that?
↠so for your first date with kyouka, i think she’d want to be somewhere quiet and intimate with you. she wouldn’t want any interruptions ((specifically from jammingyay, who enjoys butting his head in other peoples’ business))
↠the most comfortable place for her would be her room, since it’s really just an extension of her personality, and since you’re quite close, she’d be okay with letting you in her private space. she trusts you.
↠just two guys bein dudes đŸ€  ((if you’re a girl, it’s just sappho and her friend--))
↠music is one of the biggest things in jirou’s life, and i think she’d want to share it with you. that is, if you’d let her :)) she has dozens of different instruments, so if you want to attempt to learn something, she’d be totally down!! 
↠please show her what kind of music you’re into! no matter what it is, she’ll listen to it. she wants to get to know what kind of person you are when you’re not around other people, and music is a great way to do that. even if you don’t have the same taste as her, she wouldn’t mind, since a) she’ll listen to pretty much anything, she’s not picky; and b) it’s something that you’re showing her, and that’s enough to make her happy
↠she’s not a very formal person, so i think she’d just want to talk to you and hang out. i’d think kyouka would be more of a fan of a gradual relationship, one that starts from friends and slowly evolves into more. and yes, as you can probably tell, i am a sucker for mutual pining and friends-to-lovers tropes-- im a simple hoe 😌
↠she’s super fun to hang out with!! her sense of humor is really snarky, she also enjoys talking shit about people she doesn’t like. if you’re not into that, she’s able to carry on conversation really well. there’s not a moment of awkward silence between you
↠jirou actually really likes talking shit about people hsahsh- as long as it’s someone that’s been mean in some way. she won’t say anything bad about someone who hasn’t done anything to deserve it. but if you’ve wronged her in some way, boy, do you have it COMING
↠by the end of it, i just know your cheeks hurt from laughing 
↠she’s just a really fun person to be around, she may not be the most bubbly person ever, but she’s super easy-going and cool ((jirou bias incoming ekejke))
↠i do think she’d try to sneak some kind of affection if she thinks you’d reciprocate- if you’re really getting along well, she might snake her hand into yours when you’re sitting on the bed, laughing
↠honestly you might not even notice until she stops, because your hand feels empty and cold without her like your heart aa
↠if she’s really into you?? might get a smol peck on the cheek 👉👈 please try to get a smol peck on the cheek, it’s very cute and she gets so flustered
↠she goes up to you as you’re about to leave her room, grabs your shoulder, turns you around, and gives you an adorable if not slightly aggressive smooch
↠then she reFUSES to acknowledge what she just did akdfld- she turns away, beet red, and is completely silent
↠meanwhile you’re probably laughing your ass off because wow she’s so cute
↠kudos if you give one back to her, baby is on the verge of exploding ejkdjf 
↠her heart just can’t handle what you’re doing to her
↠and despite what her appearance is, her heart is doing backflips- she’s whipped <33
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momo: tea and c u d d l e s
↠she’s a very fancy person, obviously. yaoyorozu wants only the best for everyone she loves, and that, of course, includes you! she loves showing affection through giving things to others. her family status only magnifies this aspect of her personality, as being born into wealth gives her the means to spoil you rotten
↠and even though she’s bougie as all hell, she also somehow maintains an elegant and simple air about her. it’s impressive, really. it’s not like she tries to flex her money, it’s just a part of her life, and she enjoys using her privilege well
↠that being said, what’s more elegant and mature than going for tea? it’s a lovely pastime that momo would love to include you in! 
↠lowkey,, she’s a whole sugar momma dfkdjla im not even joking- she doesn’t try to be, but virtually everything she does shows how rich she is
↠you arrive at the tea room, and by god is it fancy. there’s multiple chandeliers suspended from the ceiling, which is decorated with classic renaissance-style paintings. all the tables are set with white cloth, plates made of pure fine china, flowers and woven baskets set everywhere to create a cottagecore-like setting. the air about it is so sophisticated, from the patrons (wait is that a celebrity-) to the decorations
↠your face is kinda just,,, 😼,, because what in the world did momo get you into??
“momo, you’re so sweet, and this place is lovely, but don’t you think this is a bit much? not that i don’t absolutely appreciate it, it’s just that this seems really expensive, and i don’t want you to have to spend that much for just one date.”
↠she just chuckles, saying that it was “really nothing” (???? MISS GIRL???)
“don’t worry, y/n, this isn’t too much! i want to have fun today, and this place is so nice! let’s just find a table, alright?”
↠like, hunney, you’re so kind, but this is a LOT
↠but if you say so....
↠she looks at you with the most enthusiastic, wholesome eyes, and soon you’re following her like a puppy towards your table. the waiter sits you down, and leaves, giving you a moment to glaze over the menu to find a drink
↠and there’s so many types of teas, at least 30 on this page alone. you hadn’t even heard of half of these drinks, how would you know if you’d like them?
↠yaomomo seemed to notice your puzzlement, and said that you could get a pot of something simple, like jasmine green or earl grey, and she would get something fancier that you could try. why not?
↠a few minutes later, you’ve already adjusted to the sophisticated and intimidating environment, focusing only on the girl across from you, and how her eyes glittered with happiness
↠she orders a few normal tea foods, like scones with jam, lemon curd, and devonshire cream, and finger sandwiches. the fanciest thing she buys, though, is a blooming tea that arrives in a clear pot. it has an open flower inside of it, which is what the tea is infused with. it’s nearly 16,100 yen for one pot, though, and while you protest its expense, momo reassures you that it’s no problem (you just learned not to say anything about money, as it wouldn’t stop yaoyorozu from spoiling you)
↠ngl, it’s so fun to pretend to be fancy for a few hours at a tea room !! you acted as if you were a member of high society, using stereotypes to exaggerate your actions. it made some people only slightly irritated, but hey, it got a laugh out of a pretty girl, so who’s the real winner? 
↠yaomomo taught you some classy etiquette that you should definitely use, it makes her so happy to think that you’re learning about new things while still enjoying your time with her
↠she makes really good conversation!! her intellect seeps through everything she says, anyone who talks to her would be able to tell that she’s extremely well-spoken and mature. momo is modest, and deflects a lot of the compliments you try to give her, so if you try to display your admiration for her, you’d probably need to be very specific about it. she doesn’t have the best self-image when it comes to her heroism and field work. spoken affection sometimes doesn’t get through to her, but you know what does? physical affection!
↠she loves cuddles, and will regularly take you back to her house after a date to cuddle in her bed. her mattress is legendary, and it’s comfortable as hell. there’s an abundance of pillows and the bed isn’t too soft or too firm, and it’s always somehow an amazing temperature???? mattresses are investments, and this was definitely a good one
↠momo loves the intimacy and trust of holding you, it allows her to escape from overthinking and only focus on you, her beautiful partner. she doesn’t care if she’s the big or little spoon, but her favorite kind of cuddling is when you’re on your back and she’s curled into your side, head tucked under your chin and hand on your chest
↠she can do this for hours, please let her. she feels safe with you, confident, because you’re choosing to spend time with her in this quiet moment instead of being off somewhere else.
↠in conclusion,,, 💕women 💕
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-denkineptune
447 notes · View notes
luv-leni · 3 years ago
Text
Vampire!Cravity with a human s/o
Authors Note: Hey guys so listen the inspiration for this one hit me like a semi-truck. Which means this one is long(especially minhee’s) I mean like 2k words long. I’m very sorry 😭 please let me know if having this all be one reaction kills your eyes and I’ll edit it and split it into two separate posts.
Warnings: blood, dark themes, suggestive in minhee’s part if u squint, violence, death, and overall angst. There is fluff in here too I promise. This is all fiction!
Enjoy!!
Reaction under the cut.
Serim
A gentleman but a gentleman in a high position
He probably works for a big company
He wasn’t turned too long ago so his age isn’t a problem
He has literally no clue what he’s gonna do when his age does become a problem
Anyway this businessman is very friendly
He is charming and acts like he’s got nothing to hide
U meet him outside of his workplace maybe in a coffee shop
He’s dressed to the nines and super cute so u can’t help but stare at him
Of course he notices so he offers to pay for your drink
Correction he insists on paying for ur drink
This sparks a conversation, mainly about why he’s out in public in a three-piece suit
He talks about his work and meetings and stuff u aren’t really interested in
Before u can completely lose interest tho, his eyes capture ur attention
They almost look like they’re glowing
U interrupt him to ask about his eyes and he shifts uncomfortably and brushes it off
U being perceptive notice that maybe this well put together businessman isn’t all that he seems
He on the other hand thinks u are amazing for a human and he is attracted to u very quickly
look at you heart-stealer 😉
U two start dating for completely different reasons, u want to see the skeletons in his closet and he is falling helplessly in love with u
While snooping through his personality and life u find urself starting to fall for him too
Soon his secret won’t even matter to u
Serim is very good at keeping his secret so u aren’t going to find out unless he wants u to
So whether u find out about it or not is up to him
But he is a great boyfriend so u can’t complain
Allen
Ancient vamp
Allen would be the vampire who’s been around for like 400 years
When u meet he’s reluctant to be friendly with u
He’s old enough to have seen all the people he loves leave him
So he doesn’t want to get hurt :(
It would take some persistence from u but he’d eventually warm up to you
You’d fall in love with him and all his cool vampire features
His cold skin and glowing eyes
And he falls for u hard
He’s soft to u through the whole relationship because he doesn’t want u to think he’s dangerous
Even though out of all the boys Allen might be one of the more dangerous vampires
One thing is for sure he will protect u fiercely from anyone or anything
Jungmo
Jungmo lives as if he was still human
He’s been alive(well as alive as a vampire can get) for long enough to know what he’s doing but not long enough to lose his innocence
He still loves human activities
He exercises even though he doesn't need it and eats the foods he loves even though he doesn't need to eat
He goes to the park and plays with dogs
He meets u while playing fetch with a German shepherd
U just think he’s a normal guy who is very active
When u find out he’s a vampire u don’t really believe him
And then u see his fangs
He suddenly becomes much more intimidating
He does his best to reassure u he’s still the same guy u fell in love with he just drinks blood sometimes
now u get why he volunteers at the blood bank so much
Woobin
Sweet boy
Ruby blends into society very well as a vampire
He hangs out at coffee shops and bookstores he probably even works at one
U meet him there and he is an amazing gentleman
He doesn’t want u to know he’s a vampire because u are so cute and sweet and doesn’t want to scare u
he also doesn't want to confront the fact that he is going to live forever and u won't :(
But then u find bags of blood in his freezer
When u confront him about it he is so gentle and sweet that u really aren’t that freaked out
And he shows u his cool vamp powers and promises to never hurt u
A better love story than twilight
Wonjin
Flirt flirt flirt
He thinks if he’s gonna live forever he is gonna make it worth it
So he flirts with anybody and everybody
But when he meets u
He notices that u make him feel different than everybody else
Ur different, special
U make his undead heart race and he becomes addicted to u
He still flirts with u but he does it differently
He means everything he says about u
When u agree to date him he feels alive for the first time in a while
When u find out he’s a vamp the world gets 10x more exciting
U get a boyfriend who’s basically invincible and has cool powers
Jinnie is so relieved that u aren’t scared he wraps u in a big hug and picks u up with his vampire strength
A super exciting relationship with a very exciting boy
Minhee
Ooh mysterious~
Minhee is barely noticeable in everyday life
He rarely goes out during the day and works somewhere private so he doesn’t have to meet many people
When he does go out he blends into the shadows and is so sneaky that he could get away with almost anything if he wanted to
It’s lonely but he prefers it that way
He wouldn’t talk to u unless he absolutely had to
So maybe he works in a private office and u get hired as his assistant
He doesn’t want an assistant but being a big strong vampire doesn’t mean he can do everything by himself
Ur first day u notice how closed off and dark he is
But u are determined to be his friend
As time goes on minhee becomes intrigued by how determined u are (bonus points if ur good at being his assistant)
All the tension that has been building between u two comes to a head when u confront him in his office and ask him why he’s so cold to everyone
He gets this intimidating look in his eyes and says “people aren’t worth my time anymore” or something dramatic like that
You get upset because like?? Ur obviously worth his time 🙄
So to prove it u kiss him
He’s surprised but he wants it as much as u do so he doesn’t push u away
He thinks that maybe just maybe ur the one human he can let his guard down for
Then u guys make out on his desk
Hyeongjun
I think being a vampire would dull hyeongjun a bit
He used to be this cheerful happy boy but living forever can really take a toll
So he’s a little shyer and a little quieter as he moves through daily life
He never stays in one place too long because he doesn’t want anyone to suspect him
So he doesn’t have friends or partners for very long
Then he meets u
Ur kind and friendly and u remind him of who he used to be
So he immediately becomes ur friend
Something about u is different compared to the people he usually meets it’s like he’s drawn to u
Hyeongjun comes to trust u very quickly and ends up telling u his secret himself
U don’t believe him because vampires?? real?? uh huh sure.
Hyeongjun still has the same personality deep inside so he has to show off to u so he picks up ur couch with one hand to prove he’s telling the truth
Ur rightfully shocked and he is visibly nervous
He wants u to accept him so u think over all the good memories you’ve had with him while he stares at u with wide eyes
U love him so eventually u decide to accept him and keep his secret and he couldn’t be more grateful
U accepting him definitely bring out more of his cheerful personality
U two probably move away from the city into the countryside where no one can find u
It’s peaceful and beautiful and u get to spend the rest of ur life with the one u love
Taeyoung
That last one was so sad let’s move on to the cheerful stuff
Tae is a helpful boy!
He’s gonna live forever so he’s like ‘might as well make the world a better place since I’m gonna be here forever'
He volunteers literally everywhere
He does community service and works at nursing homes
The type to go around and pay for people’s parking meters in his free time
Like jungmo he volunteers at blood banks to get his blood because he doesn’t want to hurt anybody
He does all of this under fake names that he changes every once in a while so that way no one questions why somebody who should be like 90 looks 18
He meets u while helping out at an animal shelter
U come in looking for an animal to adopt
(If u don’t like animals then u come in looking for work)
Tae helps u out with the cutest smile on his face
He’s so cute that u ask him for his number
He agrees and everything goes smoothly for u two for a while
Once ur further in the relationship tho, tae’s secret starts to eat at him
He loves u and thinks u deserve to know the truth and he hates hiding things from u
So, like hyeongjun, he tells u his secret
He does it sweetly and holds ur hand so u don’t freak out
Accept this boy and his secret and he will treat u like a queen
He doesn’t like using his vampire powers but if it makes u happy then he will
He will keep u happy for the rest of ur life if u let him
Seongmin
My babysitters a vampire incarnate
He’s a baby vampire who got turned while in high school
He can’t really control himself so he stays away from people as best he can
U see him while in class and in the hallways and u think the poor boy is just shy
He doesn’t sit with anybody during class and eats lunch alone
U find him one day outside the school eating lunch and ask to sit with him
He hesitantly agrees and u notice how cute he is
U talk to him for a while and he isn’t very responsive or talkative so u ask him why he sits alone so much
Ur expecting usual answers like maybe he doesn’t have any friends maybe people make him nervous but no
He says that he has a secret 👀
Now ur interested so u ask him what it is
He says he's a vampire and ur like damn the cute boy is crazy this sucks :((
But then he offers to prove it so u say sure and he
Has fangs???
Those must be fake right??
U lean forward and touch them and prick ur finger on one
Nope they’re real and now ur bleeding 😃
Seongmin’s eyes go wide and he scoots away from u while u search ur bag for a bandaid
When the awkwardness subsides and seongmin stops looking at u like ur dinner, u start talking about this very unique situation
He tells u that he’s literally been starving since he was first turned and needs blood badly
And u just so happen to volunteer at a hospital
So u offer to get him blood if he promises to not eat u..he agrees obviously
And that marks the start of ur very strange high school relationship
Despite how strange he can be he truly loves u and takes care of u throughout school
U two are now inseparable
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ordinaryschmuck · 3 years ago
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What I Thought About "Knock Knock Knockin' on Hooty's Door" from The Owl House
Wow. They are really pushing it for that secret message, huh?
Anywho--Salutations, random people on the internet who certainly won’t read this! I am an Ordinary Schmuck. I write stories and reviews and draw comics and cartoons!
I think it goes without saying at this point that Season Two of The Owl House is setting itself up as a season without filler. Now, filler episodes aren't always bad. Yes, it hurts when a series turns away from the main plot for a week. But at best, they're utilized as a chance for the writers to play around with the characters and developing said characters without it relating to the overarching story. So, some people who see that consider it a bad thing that a series doesn't have that many filler episodes.
I like to call those people: F**king morons.
Don't get me wrong, I see where some of you are coming from. And I'd be willing to agree...if The Owl House was a plot-driven series. Which it's not. It is a character-driven series. Because for every plot thread and narrative that the show presents, they always relate to the characters and develop them further each time these threads get brought up. For example, look at "Knock Knock Knockin’ on Hooty's Door" (It pains me just to write that). Several narratives move forward, and it’s all done to make the characters grow. And to explain how requires going into spoilers. So keep that in mind as you continue reading.
Now, let's review, shall we?
WHAT I LIKED
Hooty: Might as well start with the character that this episode is about.
To tell you the truth, I wasn't a huge fan when I found out we're getting a Hooty-centered episode. I've grown to love him over time, but he is a comedic character that's best used in small doses. Primarily due to how his voice is grating to me (My ears are still bleeding...). With that said, I do really love his contributions in "Knock Knock Knockin' on Hooty's Door" (Seriously, there couldn't have been a less awkward title?). Hooty's antics when trying to help everyone are as hilarious as they are heartwarming. He deeply cares for his friends but just doesn't understand how his plans could do some unintended harm, which is pretty lovable if you ask me. We also get some surprisingly great insight into his character, as he feels insecure about basically being the comic relief who doesn't really do that much other than being funny. Rarely do you get that level of dimension from a comedic character, and it's even more uncommon for that to work out as well as it does here. It once again proves just how competent the writing is in this series to the point where we get an episode about Hooty, and it's funny and heartwarming instead of being annoying. And whoever is responsible for that, you're the best.
Lilith’s Letter to Hooty: I mean it when I say that I love how Lilith kept her word about her and Hooty becoming penpals. Their friendship was something I would have never expected to love, and I'm still shocked that it works so well, so seeing it continue like this just warms me to the bone. Plus, it is pretty sweet that Lilith's kind words are what inspired Hooty to do what he's done in this episode...meaning it's Lilith we should thank here--SON OF A WITCH! Even when she's gone, she's still working her way into my heart!
King going through Puberty: What?! KING IS EVOLVING!
(There, I made a Pokemon reference. Do I get my cookie now?)
Eda Keeping Herself Awake to Train Herself: I'm willing to bet a large sum of money that this has everything to with Raine getting captured last week. If Eda was still the most powerful witch in the Isles, she might have actually saved them. But she isn't, and now the love of her life is in the clutches of a tyrant planning something that could potentially be the end of everything. So I can understand Eda pushing herself to her limit to get back on top again, as I would probably do the same. It's not healthy in any way, and Eda would be doing more harm than good. But when it comes to the people you love, logic doesn't always win out in the end.
Luz Wanting to Make her Way into Amity’s Heart by Making the Echo Mouse Happy: ...That's it. I Just...I just love everything about it, ok?
This was also when I knew that I was wrong to doubt that there would be zero Lumity in this episode. I realize my follies now, and I humbly apologize.
Hooty Teaching King About Demons: This was so funny. So, so funny. Probably doesn't come as a surprise, especially since The Owl House proves itself as a comedy before, but the jokes have never hit as frequently and as hard as they did here. From Hooty getting offended by King's dance to him and Dana's insert wanting a "DNA sample," everything managed to successfully make me lose my s**t. It does come at the expense of King suffering, but I can stomach that much more than if it were Eda or Luz. And, as a bonus, we get lore about how demons work, added with another great joke of King getting in trouble with Hooty for saying he already knows this stuff. Humor isn't always the show's strong suit, but when it works, it f**king works.
King Wanting to Know What he Is: But despite how funny King's vignette was, we still get to see more of his character grow. We learn that he's frustrated now that there's this big question mark over his life now, feeling extra angry that his father "abandoned" him to leave such a present mystery. It shows the hidden resentment he has that Lilith inadvertently brought out, made even worse when King's father hasn't responded to the video yet. King hasn't really gotten that much development until "Echoes of the Past," so it's pretty cool that the writers haven't really slowed down on it. Especially when it leads to these great moments of King venting his frustrations.
King’s Shouting Powers: KING learned FUS RO DAH!
(And now that's a Pokemon reference AND a Skyrim reference. WHERE'S MY GOSH DANG COOKIE!?)
Eda’s Nightmare: If King's vignette hits you hard with the laughs, Eda's will absolutely hit you harder with the feels (never make me say "feels" unironically again). Knowing that Eda's life got thoroughly screwed over by the curse is something we could figure out on her own. But seeing just how much the curse ruined her life and tore apart relationships that mean the world to her really does a swell job at ripping apart the soul. What's even more tragic is, technically speaking, it's all sort of Eda's fault too. She kept hiding the curse, refusing to be a burden to others who would do all they could to help. If she had only been open and honest, things probably wouldn't have changed much, but they most likely would have been better than they are now.
Eda Attacked her Father as the Owl Beast: ...I don't know what I was expecting when "Keeping Up A-Fear-Ances" hinted that there was some possible tension between Eda and her father...but it definitely wasn't this.
The fact that we see blood where his eye used to be doesn't make things any happier, either.
Raine Broke Up with Eda: Before we get into anything else, let's celebrate the fact that it's now confirmed that Eda and Raine really did use to date in the past. Because this show is just f**king phenomenal with its LGBTQA+ representation!
But, seriously, this is a fantastic reveal that goes far beyond just shipping...well, sort of. It shines a new light on Eda and Raine's interactions from last week, revealing that while they're not a couple anymore, they still very much love each other. It helps make their last interaction especially tragic, as they were both on the same page now and could very well be together again. Only for them to be forced apart for the second time in a way that's much worse than the first. And I frickin' adore that this series changes the impact of one episode one week later. Again, it shows just how competent these writers are, and kudos to them for making something so...perfect.
The Moon Person: WHO THE FU--Nope. Nope! We have more than enough mystery bulls**t to deal with through CreepyLuz and Philip Wittebane, so I am PUTTING YOU ON THE BACKBURNER FOR NOW!
(They're probably nothing more than a one-off character, anyway)
The Owl Beast and Eda are Connected: Through visuals alone, we, the audience, can clue into what the curse really means. The Owl Beast doesn't want to be a part of Eda as much as she doesn't want it to be a part of her. Whether they like it or not, and they very much don't, they're stuck together. The thing is, and this is what I love the most, they still decide to make the best of their situation rather than let it ruin their lives even more. This might be the best possible turn Eda's curse could have made. It'll still affect her, and there are probably more negatives than positives, but at least now, it's not the worst thing in the world. And I feel like that's all anyone can ask when in a position like her own.
Eda's “Pretty Dream”: I don't know what emotions are toiling inside me more with this moment. Awe and wonder over how beautiful Eda's dream is, or heartbreak over the implication that she has only had nightmares since getting cursed...I'm gonna say both. Yeah, it's definitely both.
Eda’s Harpie Form: Well, fan artists are gonna have a field day with this...especially the freaks.
(You know who you are. And you're weird!)
Luz Calling Amity a “Cotton-Candy Haired Goddess”: ...Have I ever mentioned how much I love this show?
Hooty Kidnapped Amity: ...Hooty, if your stupidity wasn't charming, I would be more than willing to call the authorities over how you kidnapped a girl in your version of a knapsack and locked her in the basement. For that is going to ring SO MANY alarm bells in people's heads.
Amity and Luz Stuck in a Tunnel of Love: *Smacks lips* Mmm. The adorable awkwardness of this moment is just *chef's kiss* magnifique!
Luz being afraid of getting made fun of:
Amity’s look of hope: I mean...just...f**king--LOOK AT HER:
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That is the look of a girl who, while embarrassed as hell, still is ecstatic to learn for a brief moment, everything that she is hoping for has a high chance of being real. Who, in their right mind, wouldn't go "Aw!" at something so pure and innocent?!
Luz Destroying the Tunnel of Love: This is how to effectively utilize dramatic irony. The audience can understand why Luz is tearing the place apart because she explicitly states that she's afraid of Amity rejecting her in the end. They also know that's bogus, thus making it extra painful to watch Amity's heart break more and more with each second (which is perfectly represented through Amity's expressions). You feel bad for both of them, and even worse when you know that it can easily be prevented by the simple art of communication. That's what makes it great dramatic irony. Knowing the point of view of each character results in a scene that evokes emotions in two different ways.
Hooty’s Breakdown: This was...genuinely hard to watch. Not that it was badly written, far from it. It just...hurt seeing how destroyed Hooty was when he realized he failed the people he has such an admiration for. On the upside, a wholesome moment follows soon after as the Owl House gang tries to reassure Hooty that he's done a lot of good that night. It's a pure action that shows even though Hooty gets on their nerves all the time, they still care about him...damn it. I think I'm gonna cry.
Eda’s Advice for Luz: ...Eda...You're the best.
You found out that your surrogate daughter wants to ask a girl out, and not only were you quick to deliver the best possible advice ("Just go for it!"), but you also quickly reassure her that it doesn't need to be perfect.
And you know what? That's it. Eda is the best cartoon mom! She might not technically be Luz's mom, but I don't give a s**t because she is the best!
Luz and Amity Ask Each Other Out: Shh-sh-sh-sh...
Do you hear that?
...
...
...It's the sound of dozens of Lumity fans collectively losing their s**t...and I'm one of them.
WAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!
HOO-HOO-HOO-HOO!
IT!
IS!
CANON!
AH-HAHAHAHAHA!
HOLY S**T! Holy s**t! Holy s**t...might just be the best way I could possibly describe this! Finally, after all the waiting, speculating, and praying, THESE TWO IDIOTS FINALLY GOT TOGETHER! AND IT WAS PERFECT! I mean, it was awkward as s**t, but that's what makes it perfect! You know why? You wanna--Hey! *snaps fingers*. You want to know why? It's because they're teenagers. Of f**king course, it's going to be awkward! This is their first relationship, so there will be a lot of missteps along the way. And that, in itself, brings me to the best (second best part?) thing about it happening in episode eight of the new seasons. Most endgame couples get together in the climax or even at the end of the series. But to have them get together this early on, means there will be quite a few episodes dedicated to showing them grow as a couple.
And better than that--EVEN F**KING BETTER THAN THAT--dozens of kids are going to see these two, a realistic depiction of young love that just so happens to involve two girls, and are going to learn once and for all that there is nothing wrong with being who they are. That fact alone is f**king incredible. Yes, it sucks that season three got cut short, and we'll have even less time with Luz and Amity, but knowing how many kids have felt seen today almost makes it worth it in the end.
And if I see one mother f**ker saying this was poorly paced, I might just hunt them down for SPORT...Sorry if that was an overreaction. I'M JUST SO HAPPY! Because they're happy! Look at them. Listen to them! It's so...GAH-HAHAHA!
“They’re adorable! And deserve all the happiness!”: You're darn right, Hooty! You're darn right.
King’s Father(?) Shows Up: What the--WHAT?! They're doing this now?! Here?! After everything else?
Oh, man. What could this mean? What dynamic changes will this cause in the main cast? How could the writers fit this in during the next two episodes? And what--
Hooty Eats the Letter: ...Pfffft--HAHAHAHA!
Oh, man...I should be mad, and I wouldn't blame others if they are...but that is too much of a brilliant f**k you that I can't help but appreciate it. Bravo writers. Bravo.
WHAT I DISLIKED
...Dislikes? Dislikes? You would honestly believe that after everything I witnessed in this episode, that I would have the gull to list anything wrong with it?!
HOW DARE YOU ASSUME THAT I WOULD BE SO CALLUS TO--Actually, I do kind of have an issue with the episode's title. It's just too much of an awkward mouthful for me to get behind. I understand that the writers wanted to sneak the K into the secret message, but were there really no other titles starting with K that they couldn't come up with?
But that's just a personal issue, and in no way do I think anybody else would feel the same way. Especially with how well-written everything else is anyway.
IN CONCLUSION
"Knock Knock Knockin' on Hooty's Door" (title aside) is another A+ episode. It was hilarious, heart-wrenching, and downright adorable while keeping me entertained with every minute. I'm sure there are some issues I was willing to ignore due to how expertly written everything else was, but why bother looking for the chinks in the armor when I could just enjoy a perfect episode for being so...perfect! Some of you might be willing to disagree with me, but to that, I say: Don't knock it till you've tried it.
(Now, if you don't excuse me, I'm going to go lie down. It's...It's been a day.)
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navegandoaciegas · 4 years ago
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no sweeter innocence than our gentle sin
Pairing: Bucky x Reader
Warnings: catholic priest!Bucky, virgin!Bucky, desecrating thoughts and actions, explicit language, smut, consensual sexual acts, mentions of loss of virginity, slight innocence and religious kinks (nothing disturbing), oral sex, fingering, masturbation, sex in a public (and sacred) place.
Summary: As punishment for your sinful behavior, your parents send you to your aunt’s house in the middle of nowhere, in hope you’ll redeem yourself. The punishment quickly backfires when you take an interest in the local (and handsome) priest, and you manage to corrupt his pure soul.
A/N: I was in a priest!Bucky mood this morning and I wrote this for @saiyanprincessswanie​ writing challenge. I chose prompt 17 and the ‘opposites attract’ trope. I hope you like this!
Filth and happy ending ‘cause I’m a sap. Take me to church by Hozier inspired this.
This is not a dark story and both reader and Bucky are consenting adults. Fyi, catholic priests can’t marry, and they change their name when they are ordained. We’ll pretend James is the name he took as priest.
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You look over your shoulder to check if anyone’s around and knock on the backdoor of the church, waiting for your lover to usher you inside. The sinful secrecy of it all, the rush of excitement, your love for all that’s forbidden: you’ve never felt more alive.
Being forced to spend the summer in the middle of nowhere is not the way you expected your senior year of college to end, but not all evil comes to harm, and in this quiet little town, you’ve become quite interested in the local priest. In your defence, boredom is the root of all evil, and in your case, evil happens to make you horny and prone to making bad decisions, and Father James is young and handsome, so it was only a matter of time before he gave in the temptation of the flesh and you found yourself fucked against the altar. 
Ordained or not, he’s only a man after all.
-
The confessional is dark and suffocating; behind the wooden screen, the priest is all ears.
Muscle memory kicks in when you do the sign of the cross and begin to speak. 
“Bless me Father, for I have sinned.” you recite the formula that’s been ingrained in your mind since you were old enough to need it, “My last confession was seven years ago.”
You mentally curse your parents for still having the authority to send you to Bumfuck Nowhere, Alabama, and your aunt for forcing you to attend church and confess your sins. 
It will be good for your soul, they said, New York is corrupting you.
You suppose it’s only fair that your good catholic parents would react so drastically; they wanted to surprise you in your new apartment and drove all the way from Rhode Island to New York, only to find your piano tutor buried balls deep inside of you. Lord knows what they’d do if they knew you’ve lost your purity long before that, with one of the good catholic girls in your private boarding school. Extramarital sex, with a woman at that! They’d probably have a meltdown, drag your to a cloistered convent and lock you there for life.   
You don’t wait for the priest to acknowledge you and start talking.
“You know Father, I found a handy dandy little list of all the sins you’re supposed to confess to and I checked them. I’ll read it to you. Let’s see.” you clear your throat, “So, I use artificial birth control, I broke a couple of promises, including the one to wait for marriage, I can be kind of blasphemous sometimes, but you see, I spent six months abroad in Italy last year and the kids there taught me all sorts of ways to disrespect the Lord, they have so many, and once those things get stuck in your brain... what can you do, they just stick in there, you don’t even want to say them but they become part of your vocabulary.” you continue uninterrupted, “Anyways, my parents caught me in the act with a man, so I guess we have ‘dishonoring family’ too. Underage drinking as a kid, a lot of that. Drugs sometimes, nothing major, ya know, I don’t do coke or nothing. Gossiping, impure thoughts, God-”
He interrupts you clearing his throat.
“Sorry. See? I don’t even do it on purpose. As I was saying, I love those. Lying... not a whole lot to be honest; to my parents, mostly. Haven’t prayed in a good 10 years. Masturbation, did I mention that? Watched porn a couple of times, ‘m not a big fan if I’m being honest, but to each their own. Oh, and premarital sex, a ton of that. Had an orgy once, not too fond of those either. Too many limbs.”
There’s a lot to unpack here, so you give him a moment to ponder his thoughts. He stays silent for a while, and when he speaks his voice is not at all what you expected it to be. He’s soft spoken yet commanding, and sounds surprisingly young.
“Anything else you can remember?”
“Well of course, the cherry on top, my own first class ticket to hell.” you say, not as cheerful as before, repeating the exact words you’ve been taught for years, “God gave me free will and I used it to commit homosexual acts, Father. Multiple times.” 
You let the words hang in the stuffy air of the confessional; you don’t know what to expect from the priest, to be honest. Last time you admitted to thinking of a girl to a religious figure, Sister Theresa told you you’d never have to act on your impulses, or you’d burn in hell for it. You were 12. 
“You think that’s worse than the rest?”
“Not me, no, I don’t.”
He hums thoughtfully. “What makes you do the things you do?” he asks, and you don’t feel any of the judgment you were expecting, only genuine curiosity.
“Aren’t you gonna ask me to repent for my sins?” you reply, equally as curious.
“Is absolution what you’re seeking?”
You snort, shaking your head. “I’m not looking for forgiveness, Father, and I’m way past asking for permission.”
“Then why are you here?”
“My aunt forced me.”
It’s his turn to snort this time. “You don’t seem the type to follow orders blindly.”
You admit the guy’s got a point. “I guess
 I don’t know. I felt the need to. It feels nice, talking to someone. I feel lonely a lot, and it’s easier to talk to strangers. And this is cheaper than therapy, so that’s a bonus. Really, I just need to vent.”
“Do you regret any of your choices?” he says, after a while.
“Not the ones I confessed to.” you admit, trying to discern the priest’s figure behind the screen. 
“What is it, then?”
“You know, you’re kinda chill for a priest from Alabama, I gotta give it to you.” you respond, dodging his question.
“Thanks, it’s probably because I’m from Brooklyn.”
“What the hell-” 
“Language.” 
“Sorry. Why would someone move from Brooklyn to this place?”
“Vocation.”
“I see.” 
It’s silent again, but it doesn’t feel uncomfortable.
“You should come to the parish sometimes. We have meetings, we sing, we eat together, the children play football and the young adults talk about what it means to be a Catholic in the modern world. It may ease your mind about a lot of worries and misconceptions you might have.”
You contemplate on his words: it wouldn’t hurt, would it? It’s not like you’ve got a whole lot going on here; and you might as well find yourself a devoted man or woman to pass time. 
“I might.”, you finally respond, not willing to give him the satisfaction, and stand from the chair. “I’ll see you around, Father.”
“May God give you peace, miss.”
“Amen.”
-
“What took you so long?” James asks, grunting when you pull on his hair.
“My aunt asked me to make lunch for her husband, as if he couldn’t do it his damn self.” you respond, and suck on his bottom lip, “Missed me?”
“Always.”
You coo, “My eager boy.”
He’s sitting on his office chair and you’re straddling his lap, grinding your hips on him and feeling his arousal grow. You’re burning up, panties damp and a familiar coil in your core. You don’t know what excites you the most: being responsible for the corruption of such pure soul, the forbidden aspect of fucking a Catholic priest, or the possibility of someone walking in on you. Your walls flutter when you imagine the scandal that this affair would create.
You pull him closer, tugging on his white collar, and he breaks the kiss. His eyes are black and glossed over, lips swollen, cheeks red, but there’s something like worry in eyes.
“Do you love me?” he asks quietly, in the soft voice you adore.
“Of course I do, you know that.”
You fall on your knees and fumble with the zipper of his black pants.
“Would you love me if I didn’t have this collar?” he stops your hands with his, “Would you still love me if I wasn’t this?”, he gestures to his sacred attire.
You pause your actions and search his eyes. Where is this coming from?
“Yes, I’d love you anyways, I’ll always love you.”
A small, shy smile breaks on his face. He lifts you up and makes you sit on his desk.
“I- I w-want to try something,” he begins with a stutter, “I remember hearing some kids back when I was in school talk about it.”
You cock your head to the side, observing carefully as he sits back down on the chair and parts your legs. He lowers his head and begins peppering the inner skin of your thighs with open mouthed kisses. Oh-.
“James, you don’t have to do this.” you try to tell him, but he’s already moving your panties to the side.
He stares entranced between your legs; he’s never been this bold, never watched you there. “You’re so pretty, I want to kiss you here.” 
You feel a finger tease your entrance and dip in. Every nerve ending in your body is on fire, and when he licks a strip of your dripping cunt, you feel like you could burst. He delves in your glistening folds, tongue swirling around as if he was kissing your mouth, and your hips jerk forward when he crooks a couple of fingers inside you, hitting that sweet spot that makes the coil in your belly grow tighter. 
You throw your head back and your eyes fall on the cross behind you. You are very much past forgiveness at this point, you muse, and that makes this all the more exciting.
You’re writhing under his touch, completely at his mercy. You grab the back of his neck and bring his face upward so that his mouth comes in contact with your clit.
“Suck there.” you demand in a raspy voice, rocking your hips and fucking yourself on his fingers. “Good boy.” you praise when he closes his mouth around your bud and begins sucking and lapping on it. “Yes, oh my God, fuck, faster.”
James obeys and jerks the fingers inside of you, the vibration and his tongue enough to make the knot in your core unravel and pleasure release in jolts, shooting from your center to the rest of your body; you slap a hand on your mouth to suppress wanton moans as your hips twitch involuntarily and your toes curl. He rides you though your orgasm until you’re too sensitive to handle his face on you.
When you look down, you find him, face wet in your arousal, eyes half lidded.
“Did I do well?” he asks full of hope, still clinging to your legs and nuzzling your thigh.
“You did amazing, sweet boy.”
-
“Bless me Father, for I have sinned.”
Hearing your sultry voice, he chokes on air behind the screen and clears his throat, trying to keep the same composure he always seems to loose when you’re around. 
“I got friendly with a man, you see, a man of church.” you begin in a teasing tone, “He kissed me, and I didn’t pull back. I let him roam his hands all over my body, Father, and then I corrupted him.”, You lick a couple of fingers and dip them in your mouth, then you release them with a popping sound and slowly slip them in your panties. You push a finger in your already wet core, smearing arousal around and teasing your clit, slow at first. “You should have seen how innocent he looked, Father. He said he’s never been touched like that. A virgin. I’ve never been with a virgin before.” you continue, almost moaning the last part as you slide three fingers in and out of you and tease your bud with your thumb, “He didn’t even know I could please him with my mouth, so I took him in and I sucked him off.” You’re panting, hand furiously circling your clit. You hear Bucky’s ragged breath behind the screen. “He moaned so loud, F-F-Father, he c-came so quick. And I swallowed it all, because you can’t let a single drop of seed g-go to w-waste, can you?” you whimper, feeling an orgasm build up.
You’re fueled by his suppressed grunts and the lewd sounds of him touching himself.
“I don’t come for absolution Father, because I’d do it all again.” you breathe at last, letting pleasure run through your every nerve, setting you ablaze. 
Behind the screen, Father James paints his hand and black shirt in white spurts, shame and pleasure fighting eachother in his mind.
-
You haven’t moved yet, legs parted, trying to catch your breath, and James is still clinging onto you.
You don’t know how it happened. 
It started with boredom, with a wish to fuck the pretty priest, but you’ve caught feelings now, and in three weeks you’ll have to get back to New York, where a job and a new apartment await you.
At least your aunt and your parents are happy about your redemption: you’ve been going to church everyday. They don’t need to know you’ve spent most time on your knees or on your back.  
But you don’t want to think about it now; you can’t let sadness take over and ruin these moments when James is only yours. Your love is on borrowed time, and you intend to make the most out of it.
“Do you want to fuck me, my love? You want me to come all over your pretty cock, yes? You want to fill me up with your cum?” you whisper in his ear, amused at the way he blushes.
“Please.” he whines, palming his cock through his briefs.
“Please what, sweet boy?”
“Please let me-” he interrupts himself.
“Let me what?”
He mumbles something incomprehensible.
“Can’t hear you.” you tease him, grabbing his chin and tilting his face up.
“Let me make love to you.”
You let out a chuckle and shake your head fondly. This man has had you bent over his desk, in the confessional, behind the altar, on the benches where the devoted Catholics of this town attend mass, and yet he can’t bring himself to talk crudely.
You pull on his hair so he stands, and you kiss him ravenously, letting your hands roam over his lean body, the taste of his lips permanently etched in the back of your mind. You don’t want to forget a thing, so you commit to mind each of his little noises, the way his tongue swirls around yours, the soft caresses of his hands.
Clothes discarded in a blur, the room is filled with your moan and his grunts. He pounds into you like a desperate man, clinging onto you with a bruising touch, holding you impossibly close as if you were about to slip through his fingers. And in a way, you are.
When James makes love to you the world disappears and there’s no judgement, no church. He’s not a priest, you’re not a sinner; he’s not pure, you’re not sick.
It’s just you and him, united in one body. Just a man and a woman being one in the flesh.
His thrusts become sloppier, his breathing labored. He brings a hand on your clit and presses on it. He comes inside of you, painting your walls, and the feeling of his swollen cock inside you and his cum filling you up are enough to trigger your release too, your walls clenching on him and milking every last drop.
You’re exhausted, panting in each other’s embrace. 
There’s no sin when you’re like this; you’re no longer the devil to his holy water. 
There’s only love.
-
James’ desk in his office is dark and wide, with mahogany panels on all three sides except the one he sits at. So when Ms. Lee, the adorable elderly lady that organizes the monthly fundraising events for charity, knocks on the door as you’re bouncing on James’ cock, all you have to do is crouch down and disappear under the table.
“Good evening, Father James.” She greets him cheerfully.
You hear the tapping of her heels until she plops down on the guests chair. 
“Good evening, Ms. Lee.” he responds in a strained voice, adjusting himself on the chair.
Ms. Lee speaks a lot. She’s talking James’ ear off, blabbering about the next charity event, and you think what better occasion than this one to be an indecent slut.
You slowly massage his thighs, bringing your hands from his knees to his groin, teasing him when you get close to his crotch and retracting. 
You watch as his cock swells in front of you, and you bite back a giggle. You hear him suck in a breath when you start pumping his length with both your hands.
“Are you alright, James? You’re looking a little worse for wear.” Ms. Lee asks him worriedly when she sees her priest red and sweaty.
James clears his throat and when he’s about to open his mouth, you lick a strip from base to his leaking tip, and the noise that escapes him is between a moan and a grunt.
“Y-yes, Ms. Lee, I’m fine. Just some food poisoning I think.” he manages to answer, wiping his forehead with the back of his hand.  
“Poor thing.” she coos, and you take his cock in your mouth, swirling your tongue around, sucking on the frail skin of under the tip, “Anyways-” she begins again.
James tries to keep his composure, but you sense his distress, and you imagine it must be written all over his face. One hand massages his balls, the other aids your movements as you bob your head up and down, careful not to make a noise. His legs twitch under the table when you push his cock all the way down to your throat, and he makes a strangled noise.
“Sweetie, are you sure you’re fine? You really don’t look like it.” Ms. Lee interjects again, interrupting her story.
“I’m fine ma’am, don’t worry about me.”, he says through gritted teeth, jaw clenched shut so hard he might break his teeth.
You give it all you’ve got until your jaw is aching and your knees are killing you. Your effort pays off when, with one last motion on your hands, James grunts and cums in your throat, hips jerking forward and legs shaking.
He comes so hard that you choke on his release.
“Did you hear it too?” she asks in alert.
“He-hear wh-what?” he stutters, pretending to cough to hide your noises.
“A choking sound?”
“Oh, no, don’t worry about that, just my cough.” he answers, red faced and spent.
“I guess
” she doesn’t sound convinced but lets it go anyways. She could never imagine her sweet priest is getting blown by a city whore under his desk, “I’ll get going then, but please get some rest Father, your holy duties can wait.”
They can indeed, you think, as James yanks you from underneath the table and bends you over the desk, fucking you until you’re crying.
-
“What makes you do the things you do?” he’s playing with your hair as he asks the question that’s been plaguing him for months, since that first time in the confessional.
You’re in a motel somewhere, two hours away from your town, laying on a bed like two lovers. In this room, you’re not a dirty little secret.
What excited you before, suffocates you now.
You thought you may only like the forbidden, but you find yourself at peace in his arms, that peace you’ve yearned for for 22 years, that peace you could never find, because people like you are born sick, that’s what you’ve been told your whole life.
“If I tell you, will you absolve me?” you ask, basking in his affection. 
James is so sweet, so caring. You wish this moment could last forever.
“I’m afraid I can’t do that, my love. I’ve sinned too much myself.”
“My bad.” you giggle.
Silence falls on you, and you hum in though, pondering your next words very carefully.
“I don’t do them for any reasons, other than they feel good. It feels good to drink, to smoke, to fuck you, to suck your cock.”, you say, and he blushes in embarrassment, “Or maybe I never got over my teenage phase and I just like doing all the things my parents always told me not to do, who knows. Trauma? Maybe. Spite? Quite possibly. I don’t even know at this point.”
He nods slowly. 
He wishes you could see yourself through his eyes, see how perfect you are. In his heart, there’s only love for you, in his mind, no more conflict.
“I do them for you.” he answers, and you smile at him, “And for myself, I guess. I thought I had found my way, but maybe I was wrong.”
You turn to look at him, and bop his nose.
“I’ll always love you, no matter what choice you make. I’ll wait for you if you ask me to.”
But his choice has been made already. 
He doesn’t deserve his collar, but hopefully he deserves you.
-
I’m curious to hear your thoughts. Please, reblog if you liked it and leave a comment. Feedback is always appreciated. đŸ€
Priest bucky masterlist
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absolutebl · 4 years ago
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This Week In BL
April 2021 Part 5
Being a highly subjective assessment of one tiny corner of the interwebs.
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Ongoing Series - Thai
Close Friend Ep 2 (JaFirst) - First is a cat. No actually a cat. It was WEIRD. Cute, but creeping towards beastiality. It reminded me of that strange series out of China (@heretherebedork says Youth in the Breeze). The most amusing thing to me was that the cat used Thai formal linguistic register when of course cats would use informal rude guu mueng with EVERYONE. No cat would use pom. Don’t be ridiculous, Thailand. 
Second Chance Ep 5 - still invested, things progressed for all 3 couples, in one direction or another. They cuties. I love them. Carry on. 
Y-Destiny Ep 5 - the “virgin scoreboard” is gonna make the seme real hard to redeem with this pairing. If they bother. This might be a life lesson episode. What does it remind me of? Oh yes. Kids. *SHUDDER* Point of interest: did you notice Team uses ha with Mon? What a pushy flirt. 
Lovely Writer Ep 10 - honestly I just love it when Poppy shows up in anything, why is he such a delightful screen presence? (Gene’s brother) Sorry, distracted. What happened in this one? Oh, ya know, stuff and things. Family drama. (It is just me or have they been giving us some long ass episodes lately?) Obligatory beach trip activated. (Result = dumb probability mathematics jokes.) Next week it looks like we have Keeping Actor’s Closeted 101. You know the Casting Couch? This is the Casting Closet. 
Fish Upon The Sky Ep 4 - early stage confession, how fun. It’s not unprecedented it just usually means we are in 4 act structure, not 3, which means Fish might go more serious than I thought. Honestly? I’m losing interest mostly because I’ve gone from mild annoyance to active dislike of Pi. Happened to me with Tine too. They better redeem this obtuse tsundere uke soon or he’s not tsundere at all he’s just a jackwit. 
Brothers Ep 13 fin - a kiss and the family finds out about the not-so-brotherly brothers, drama, graduation, THE END. My side-dish happy heart made thumps over Q + delivery boy, I’m sad they got so little screen time. My babies KhunKaow did get a tiny coming out sequence as such. I’m seriously considering doing myself a bootleg of just the KhunKaow plot, but that means I’d have to rewatch the whole darn series and I can’t STAND the idea. Which should give you insight into how not good this show it. Very NOT good. Must we get a season 2? Please stop now, Line. 
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Ongoing Series - Not Thai
HIStory 4: Close To You (Taiwan) Ep 7 - Muren is the cutest peanut and anyone who says otherwise can fight me, although they probably have to go through Licheng first. I was NOT invested in these two at the beginning, but as a couple? They own my soul. The other storyline is still the dumpster fire that I can’t decide to roast marshmallows over (knowing they’ll get tinged with eu de trash) or flee from in horror clutching my pearls and my nose. H4 continues to provide the quality psyche torture I’ve come to expect from this franchise. *sarcastic thumbs up*  *** A word on seeing Boxiang show up (side dish from H3:MODC). It was an unexpected pleasure, I loved his pairing (May/December is a winner for me *glares at Method*) but I do think it was a bone from the franchise telling us that we are never getting that spin-off or reboot that people yearn for. However, how AWESOME that Licheng has someone to go to and ask about topping properly. Otherwise he’s sure to have screwed it up. (Pun intended.) 
Papa & Daddy (Tailwan) Ep 1-2 - this came out of nowhere and is ADORABLE. Applies a ton of BL tropes (cheek kiss, his closet, B&W stripes, drag baby around, boop) but what IS it? More slice of gay domesticity than romance. Like 2019â€Čs Kinou Nani Tabeta? or currently airing Close Friend. I enjoy this style, very wholesome, but I’m not sure what to call it. (Bonus points for cutie lesbians.) A bit weird to have a kid with your partner and STILL not be out to your parents. I hope they aren’t going to throw in a break up for dramatic effect. 
My Lascivious Boss (Vietnam) Ep 4 - I’m really enjoying this series. It’s unabashedly queer, although there’s some problematic stuff lurking under the wig. How it ends is gonna dictate if they handled this stylishly. But hot damn the leads ZING on screen together and their crackling prank-flirting is a joy to watch. 
Word of Honor (China) Ep 31-33 - moving into the home stretch. Big rescue and the band is back together (presumably for the final slaughter). Then a death! *this is my shocked face* Did I tear up? Of course I did. 4 act structure is designed for maximum pathos during the final 1/4. Did we all faint from the symbolism of the love token hair stick being gently thrust into Ah Xu’s bun? Sure we did. All that and sill I’m flagging. This is a long-arse show. Save me, Korea, with your iItsy bitsy teenie weenie...
Nobleman Ryu’s Wedding (Korea) Ep 5-6 - I am getting such strong 12th Night vibes from this. Tae Hyung is now brigadier of BL’s historical himbo brigade. (To be deployed whenever you are in need of poetry or a cut sleeve.) This show is all ridiculous charm and I LOVE it. Although, five seconds of Lee Sang is not enough Lee Sang. I had to immediately rewatch Wish You. 
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Gossip
Nitiman gave us an actor intro BTS teaser. 
Kang In Soo (AKA Kyang Insoo) posted a cute behind the photo shoot of Nobleman Ryu’s Wedding plus a silly interview with Jang Eui Soo on his YouTube channel (you should subscribe, it’s a fun channel, his fitness regime is both insane and inspiring). 
My Engineer 2 dropped a couch interview with the boys but it feels like one that was filmed a while ago (oh and no subs).  
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STARTING SOON: Nitiman, Love Area, Top Secret Together, Be Loved in House, & I Promised You The Moon  
Nitiman (Thai) May 7, One 31. University set, moons, engineering students, enemies to lovers, adapted. - Looks to be a solid 2 Moons knock off, I’m in.
Love Area (Thai) May 8, AIS Play, 10 eps total. Restaurant set, stars Pak Chavitpong (the only good thing about Cupid Coach) and the OST is sung by Jeff Satur (Ingredients). - It’s boys in love revolving around food = my kryptonite, try to stop me from watching this probable trash. 
Top Secret Together (Thai) May 14, Line TV. 5 couples, one IRL (Newyear from I Am Your King), story arcs revolve around secrets.  - I’m getting fatigued by these multi-couple sampler pack dramas, but I’ll try it for Newyear’s sake.  
Be Loved in House: I Do (Taiwan YES!) May 20, Viki. Office set, relationships prohibited at work by a new boss, one of the employees is determined to figure out why. Grumpy/tsundere pairing so loads of drama. - I am so flipping excited for this one. A 4th BL series from Taiwan in less than a year? That’s unprecedented. GO BABY ISLAND GO! 
I Promised You the Moon (Thai) May 27, Line TV. Follow up to I Told Sunset About You with the boys now at university. - I won’t be watching this as I have yet to finish season 1. 
Possibly Gameboys season 2.  - Rumors are all over the place right now on this. 
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Next Week Looks Like This: 
Some shows may be listed later than actual air date for International accessibility reasons. 
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Upcoming 2021 BL master post here.
Links to watch are provided when possible, ask in a comment if I missed something.
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wolf-queer-discourse · 3 years ago
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Adventures in Aphobia #3
My last two Adventures in Aphobia both took on similar flavors of eye-rolling at shameless, obvious bigotry to anyone willing to look or care. But today, I found a different type of aphobia, and I’m actually eager to talk about this one. Have a read of this first.
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Look, the bar of respect for ace people is so low it’s all the way in hell, but I mean, to many people, especially allosexual people, they may look at this post and think, “No, this isn’t aphobia. The poster wasn’t blatantly cruel.” But what some fail to realize is that politeness can be the thinnest of veils over the ugliest of takes. Polite bigotry gaslights the victims into thinking they can’t be upset about this.
So what’s the deal with this post?
PARAGRAPH #1 starts off innocently enough, saying ace discourse wouldn’t exist if people recognized complex relationships to sex and relationships. Even taken on its own, I do not agree with this. Ace discourse ranges all the way from outright denial of asexual existence to the strong hatred for and exclusion of aces from the queer community. Nearly everyone recognizes people have complex relationships to sex...that...that doesn’t mean ace people won’t be discriminated against. In fact, it’s an argument aphobes use constantly to try and gaslight ace people into erasing themselves. Ace discourse comes from a lot of places, but at the end of the day, it all stems from people’s refusal to acknowledge ace people and their unique experiences. This poster absolutely does not get to say “IT’s CoMpLicAteD”, and expect ace people to just disappear. Honestly, it’d be better and more honest if they said “Lol, ace people should go fuck themselves and hop to the back of the line with everyone else.”
PARAGRAPH #2 and #3 are not very objectionable on their own. Everything said is true. Society has very complicated views on sex, and life happens to all people. The ugly part of this is that the poster is setting up an argument here in which they will hand wave ace people into the “everyone else” crowd and pretend as if we’re all just too similar and no labels should even exist.
This is literally what enby-phobes do. They say “Well, gender is COMPLICATED”, which is true, but then they say “So like...aren’t we all really nonbinary when we think about it? Why should enby people label themselves?” I swear we’ve all seen this. The poster is agender. This argument could easily be whipped in their face. Different forms of bigotry can share very clear overlaps, and it’s very important to acknowledge where these arguments come from and why they exist. It exists as a way to shut people up. It happens to bi people too! Every day, people come out as bi and someone tells them “pff, everyone thinks girls are hot. I had a crush on my best friend once, that doesn’t mean I’m not straight! All people are like this!” Let’s call out this erasure where we see it. It’s not the same thing, and if anyone saying stuff like this truly believes what they’re saying, maybe they’re the ones who need to reevaluate their own identity.
PARAGRAPH #4 dips its ugly toes straight into blatant aphobia, having the gall to call ace and aro people “obsessed” with pretending their relationships with sex and romance are wholly unique and different. Nah, fuck right off with that bullshit. The poster even goes on to say ace people have created entire new social classes. Uh...WHAT? Is there some secret ace society with a caste system living in the shadows?? What is this person talking about?? I suppose you can’t be a true bigot unless you have some vague grievance to weakly hand-gesture at that you couldn’t prove given 20 years to do so. For the love of my sanity, just say you hate ace people! It’s okay! (I mean, not actually, but Jesus Christ does it save us all some time). They also say things like “somehow excluded from”. Replace asexual people with nonbinary people and take a joyride through this section, because the arguments are scarily similar. What would it take for this poster to acknowledge ace and aro people have their own experiences? Seriously, what? What holds you back from doing this?
It’s also funny to note the actual lack of substance to this argument. The poster is not giving any specific examples or even bringing up what being ace and aro mean. Yes, there is a pretty noticeable difference between feeling sexual attraction and not feeling sexual attraction. How many “allo” people do you know that say they’ve NEVER experienced this? Come on. The poster reduces asexuality and aromanticism down to allo people’s, in their own words, hyper-specific contexts where they don’t want sex or love. At least the poster admits any circumstance that allo people are comparable to ace people are extremely specific. But for real, are we hinging a whole argument on a few very specific examples of allo people having some similarity to ace people?
“Nothing about your relationship to sex or love makes you more or less LGBT. If you are gay and don’t want to have sex, ever, you are still gay. “
Mini strawman alert for the idea any ace person thinks you’re less gay if you’re also ace. And bonus points for an aphobe who refuses to use the definition of asexuality: not experiencing sexual attraction, and instead goes for “don’t want to have sex”. For the last. Fucking. Time. Not wanting to have sex and being asexual are NOT the same. Don’t make me pour gasoline in my eyes every time I see this.
After this, the poster goes on a tangent, which by the tone, seems to think it's very inspiring, and says no matter how you want to have sex (including only certain days of the week), you’re still straight! It’s so fucking condescending and gross to talk ace people out of their own identity like this.
“EVERY person who is heterosexual is different in how they perform or experience.”
Oh. My. GOD. THEY DIDN’T EVEN SAY STRAIGHT. THEY SAID HETEROSEXUAL. WUGGYUEGYUG. God help me. Can one be both bisexual and heterosexual? No
? Okay. So then. How is one both asexual AND heterosexual? What single brain cell in this poster’s head was responsible for this Chad of a sentence? I—
*deep breath* 
So. It’s interesting how the poster says “perform or experience it”. Asexuality is an identity. It is not a performance, and it is not defined by your actions. A straight person not having sex does not become asexual. And sure...people with the same label can experience their sexuality differently, but...to a point, guys. You can’t experience your sexuality out of the DEFINITION of the label. Heterosexual: Sexual attraction to the opposite gender. Asexual: Sexual attraction to no one. If a “heterosexual” isn’t sexually attracted to anyone, they are by definition, not heterosexual. It takes insane mental gymnastics to make this argument, so A for flexibility, I guess? 
“Gayness, straightness, and bisexuality are not defined by HOW you do or don’t want sex or HOW you do or don’t want to date, it’s just defined by WHO you want to be with.”
The first part of the sentence is correct, but it also defeats this person’s entire argument. Ace people AGREE with this. Being asexual is not the act of not having sex!! It’s not experiencing sexual attraction! You can google this! The second part of the sentence is mostly correct, depending on your interpretation. The issue is in part with the words the poster used: gayness, straightness and bisexuality. These words are not all equivalents. Gay could refer to sexual and or romantic orientation. Thus an ace gay person. Straightness is not actually an equal word to gayness. This is because straight is an exclusive term for a normative sexuality (in society’s eyes) in terms of sexual and romantic attraction. Some ace people DO call themselves straight, though it’s inaccurate. Ace people can be heteroromantic, but because being straight is so exclusive, you need to be both sexually AND romantically attracted to only the opposite gender.
The post basically ends telling ace people they’re all actually straight and were just confused the whole time. Lovely. And an erasure of gay aces too! Believe it or not, gay ace people do not like having their ace identities erased. Who’d have guessed?
Honestly, if anything this post is just kind of sad. A sad reflection of what people believe and how they truly do not see their own bigotry. They believe they’re freeing ace people from an incorrect label. They’re the heroes.
They’ll say “it’s okay, you’re not asexual” as if they've like...lifted a burden off of ace people. Like, “Oh, you think I’m not asexual? Cool, cool. Glad you cleared that up for me!” It’s sad how aphobes think, some very genuinely, that asexuality is just some high school party that went off the rails, and we’re all just coming out of the drunken haze, ready to go home. Ready to all laugh about it later, tease one another about how wild and silly it all was. 
Having your identity erased like this is fucking horrible, and I hope people like this can take a look in the mirror and see themselves clearly. All ace and aro people have a right to their identity, whether gay, bi, heteroromantic or anything else. End of story.
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bored-storyteller · 4 years ago
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Hiya! I'm the anon who requested hcs for our precious clowns, and they are so sweet and heart-warming! Thank you, thank you, thank you!!! 💙💙💙
Also, loving Uta is nothing to be sorry about, it's completely understandable and something to be proud of :ĐŽ
And uhh... I was wondering if I may request some more? Ugh I'm so greedy, please feel free to ignore me. I'm just gonna say it in case you'd be up for it.
So. Imagine this. Uta and Itori with a ride-or-die kinda s/o. Like, somebody who isn't simply accepting but also fiercely loves each and every part of their beautiful, wretched souls, wants to observe and know and feel all of them, violence and hedonism as well as gentleness and fragility. Maybe they have no care for their own life, or maybe the danger excites them, or they just think it's all worth it, or it's all of it at once. Bonus points if the s/o is human. You know, for higher stakes.
Aaand... there. I said it. Whew, is sending anon asks supposed to be so weirdly intimate or am I just THAT starved for tg clown content? đŸ€” Maybe both. Anyway, I hope you have a good day and life and good everything, cuz you're amazing and you deserve it 💙
Dear Anon, you're too kind with me. It's nice to see that there are those who appreciate what I write! And ask me what you want, you're my inspirational muse now! Although I have to say I don't know if this time I was able to meet your expectations. More than headcanons I had some little stories in my mind. But, I hope it's not too disappointing!
42- Tokyo Ghoul, Uta, Itori x human!Reader
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- "If you were a ghoul ... I would really like to eat you." That statement by Uta is paradoxical, and he sees the doubt in your eyes. But even if you are the perfect meal, that very human being of yours prevents him from wanting to eat you, because if he wanted to, you would have no chance to save yourself. Yet you seem such a curious one about him, and as long as you take your steps towards him with your questions, he won't deny you or falsify the answer, but at the same time he won't tell you more than you need to know.
- "Do I smell good?" Your question makes him smile. He would never deny it, he doesn't even deny the fact that the affection he feels for you can affect the desire he has to feed on you.
"Do you want to taste me?" You never ask with malice, it is always curiosity, the desire to understand and know.
"I know you would let me do it" he only replies to you.
-He doesn't know if it's masochism on your part or love, but having you there on his lap, with bare shoulders, bothers him and excites him at the same time. He is sure to be full even more than he should, so as not to risk killing you in any way.
"Are you sure?" he asks you, even though he knows his question is superfluous. You smile at him, and then he dares to continue. He first kisses your skin, as if he is preparing it, and then he bites your flesh. He feels your muscles contract at the stimulus, and the blood rushes into his mouth without even asking him to make an effort to extract it. It is warm and sweet, like you are.
“We should do this more often” he whispers to you, licking his dirty lips.
- You may happen to see him lying on the sofa from time to time, in a state of semi-sleep. He doesn't mind feeling the weight of your head on his stomach as you snuggle up to him. "I just ate ..." he informs you lazily, while his hand rests delicately on your head. He knows that you will simply smile at him: "I know".
- If you don't focus too much on what they are, it's not hard to hold an eyeball in your fingers. "Sometimes ... I have the impression that you wouldn't mind that much if I ate you." Uta tells you in a slightly amused tone of voice as he bends over to steal his food with his lips. Usually you don't give him an answer, and you just look at him smiling, but deep down you know, that whatever he did to you now you couldn't stop loving him.
- He wouldn't be Uta if he wasn't a ghoul, and he wouldn't be Uta if he wasn't broken and at the same time perfect, as you see him. Uta may also think you are a masochist, but you don't know if you actually feel like one. Simply, knowing that those lips that touch your skin so lovingly and that those teeth that play with your earlobe could be not only your undoing, but also your death, excite you and at the same time make you love him even more. And he knows it by now, and he has learned to enjoy that constant deprivation of the pleasure you would give him, challenging it, touching your neck with his tongue, where he feels the pulse of your heart accelerate.
- "What if I devour you one day?" he asks you with a slight smile, gently holding your face in his hands. You smile at him: "I would become part of you." It wouldn't be such a bad ending to your human life
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- Itori is so sweet and so sensual at the same time. As her arms surround your neck and her chest presses against yours, you can hear her deadly whispers as she speaks only to you. She needs to be free, she can't really repress her ghoul nature, and it happens that while she is cuddling you like this, you will suddenly feel some sort of pain coming from your neck, or your earlobe, or from your shoulder. She laughs, as she licks the blood off you, and despite everything, despite the fear you should have, if she is the one doing it you can only feel pleasure.
-She shows her cards right away. She likes to have fun, and she knows that she does acts that humans might think of as hideous and sadistic. But you chose her, not the human world. And she gladly accepts your openness to her. You don't have to feel sorry for her victims, right? You are safe with her anyway.
- "Can I taste you?" And who knows if she wants a bite or a kiss? It is when she comes close to your lips that you understand what she is asking for. She obviously wants to cuddle. But you know that even when your lips meet, when her tongue plays with yours, she is savoring you. And that pleases you both. The fact that she perceives a taste on you, a taste that she likes, is extremely dangerous but at the same time extremely tempting.
- "If one day I had to kill you, you would forgive me, wouldn't you?" She asks you in a slightly high, playful voice, while she is busy letting you light kisses down her neck.
"Would you like it?" Your question makes her smile, and her cheek rubs against yours, as if she were a kitten: “Yes. I would like. But I'm still not sure it's worth it. "
- "Today we had fun, do you know?" When she tells you similar phrases, you know that gruesome scenarios open up for you, but you can't help but listen to her anyway. That violent side of her is part of her, and you can't help but be fascinated by it as she hugs you from behind, whispering the grisly details to you as if that were an RPG.
- "If someone else dared to bite you I would be terribly jealous, do you know, my precious human?" Her fingers press eagerly on your lips, while illuminated by her lip gloss they smile at you naturally.
"Don't let anyone do that, then." You simply say to her as you enjoy the feel of her orange hair between your fingers.
"You are mine, my dear sweet human."
-"Thank you." Her sweet voice makes you turn to her, meeting her light lips of hers, waiting for yours.
"Thanks for being here." Now her lips rest on your cheek "Thank you for being such a masochist."
And if only she knew how much you risk for her, how much it could hurt you. You like to make her happy, and her smile at this moment is for you the confirmation that all this is worth it.
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