#bones of a rabbit writing
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infodumps abt a new au idea (the demon-familiars au, or the un-familiars au)
TL,DR: Reader is a witch/wizard hired by a town to handle a poltergeist/demon problem (Vanny has a cult and is trying to summon demons lol), but they aren't very good at being a witch/wizard and after a bunch of 'throwing things at the wall to see if anything sticks' and absolutely nothing working, they, in a panic, kind of accidentally summon Sun and Moon, who are equally shocked to see them and after a bunch of staring at each other like ?????????? reader ropes Sun and Moon into helping them and hides them in plain sight as their 'familiars' until they've taken care of the demonic cult problem, promising to send them home as soon as things are ok again. PLOT TWIST THEY GET ATTACHED TO EACH OTHER AND KISS PROBABLY HAHAHAAAAAA
(the long initial ramblings/brainstorming i did w the space aces in discord is copy-pasted below, if anyone wants only vaguely coherent ideas n concepts abt this au and ur willing to torture urself, go nuts w it ig lol)
taken directly from the space aces discord, i present: the reason all of my aus are barely coherent and somehow overly thought through and barebones all at once, as shown by the following example (unfamiliars au edition)
weird silly demons/familiars Sun Moon au where Reader is a (less than talented) amateur witch/wizard trying to lie themselves into a position of relative security (bc theyve had to move three different times bc towns shun n drive away witches/wizards that proves to be unhelpful) and they werent actually trying to summon sun n moon so they end up getting them involved in their scheme but oops there is some kind of other demonic threat that is actually a big problem and oops oops now we have to seriously work together to not get killed by the other eviller demon or the cult summoning it while also fooling the townsfolk into thinking that u r competent and have everything under control
Sun and Moon, a couple of demons just chilling when suddenly summoned to the material world: what in the heck Reader, having just performed a spell/ritual they've never read the instructions for backwards and facing the wrong cardinal direction: SHUT UP AND PRETEND TO BE MY FAMILIAR FOR A MINUTE OR WE ARE BOTH GONNA GET KILLED, BURNING-ON-A-CROSS STYLE
hhhgj i just had. a rlly sappy idea for the 'familiars' part
basically like. witches n wizards naturally end up casting their own 'summoning' spell for their familiar at some point, most of th time when they are really starting to understand and control their magic? so to see a witch or wizard without one it's like 'wow they're a beginner' or 'something is wrong with them, why dont they have a familiar??'
so Reader asks Sun n Moon to pretend to be their familiars partly bc 'uh oh i summoned two whole entire demons without even meaning to i have to make this look intentional' and 'if i have a familiar the people will assume im a Real Witch/Wizard and respect me more'
and at one point when they r getting to be like, actual friends instead of 'weird roommates', Sun gets curious bc ofc he does
Sun: Soooo,, we're your pretend-familiars? Reader: Yea Sun: Sooooooooo,, do u not have a familiar? I've never heard of a wizard with no familiar Reader, visibly upset/disappointed (in themselves): Yeah, well, it turns out it's only the witches and wizards with actual skills that can summon familiars. So. Couldn't tell you if I've got one or not, I've never managed a proper summoning spell. Sun, foot in his mouth: oh,, Reader: Yep.
and then later. It turns out. There are ways to make a demon into a familiar! Turns out in the distant past some wizards used to make demons they frequently summoned for spell/magic services into familiars bc it was way easier than just doing the entire summoning ritual every single time
but at this point, Reader and Sun n Moon are close enough to be good friends, and Reader doesnt want to force that kind of permanent connection on them, they probably just want to go home, theyre probably sick of being here and being around u, and,,, u get the idea
and Sun n Moon dont wanna force that kind of permanent connection on YOU bc what if ur sick of them, or ur tired of feeding and housing them or putting up with their jokes n bickering, or maybe after everything u really dont want anything to do with demons!!!
so there's a lot of sad pining that none of them know abt
bc ofc they r all idiots in this au sorry thems the rules
and then at some point there is some big threat/place they have to go to, or maybe Reader gets injured in a fight, idk take ur pick, anyway in a heat of the moment panic Moon is like 'HEY U WANT US TO BE UR FAMILIARS RIGHT??' and reader like barely conscious is like 'w??? yea??????' thinkin he means the pretend thing theyve had going on
anyway spur of the moment/'im doing this to save ur life bc i love u' familiar binding spell/ritual performed BAM now ur stuck together
and when everything is calm again n the fighting is over reader looks at Moon and is like 'so ur like,, my actual familiar now,,' and Moon, sweating bullets, unsure if this is rlly what u wanted or if u went with it out of fear of dying, is like 'yyyyyyyyyes?'
and reader starts bawling their eyes out and kisses him bc this is like. th dream scenario to u
anyway reader n sun n moon are th worlds least likely wizard/familiars combo but somehow they r absolutely unstoppable together thank u for coming to my tedtalk
#bones of a rabbit au#fnaf au#fnaf dca#fnaf dca au#unfamiliars au#demon familiars au#witch/wizard reader#demons sun and moon#cultist vanny#fnaf dca x reader#fnaf sun/moon x reader#fnaf sun/moon x y/n#fic ideas#ideas#au concept#au rambles#the creation process#also surprise im not deaddddd huzzah#bones of a rabbit writing#reader attempting to con their way into their dream job: accidentally summons some demons#the demons: oh my god they are so stupid#later.. the same demons: oh shit we're in love with them
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I need more dca fics to read, not just because they're all so cool and special and unique-
I want to collect their y/n's in my pocket, and bring back the y/nverse. All of them in a lil pocket dimension (the dca stay in their respective stories, this place is reserved for the self inserts and side characters/family to interact. The boys can have their own pocket dimension)
The y/ns live on the same street or apartment complex, being bunched into groups that are roomies
For example. Bamsara's Solar Lunacy y/n, Paper-Lilypie's CCRT y/n, and bones-of-a-rabbit's staffbot y/n. SB is there so CCRT can perform routine maintenance, plus CCRT can be a but messy, plus they could help clean up after ccrt's kids. SL is where, you may ask? Their room has been vacant for some time, but CCRT and SB keep it clean and regularly dusted, out of respect. They don't know if or when their friend will return, but they'll be welcome at any time.
Naffeclipse's y/ns share a suite, probably.
spadillelicious's LDR y/n could stay with saltciphblr's lovebug au y/n
Again, I need to read more to get a better feel of the different wonderful y/n's
This probably won't be uploaded, maybe someday, but this is mostly self indulgence that my brain has been blasting on repeat all day
Into the y/nverse, I raise you from the depths
#bamsara#spadillelicious#paper-lilypie#bones-of-a-rabbit#saltciphblr#naffeclipse#dca#fnaf#into the y/nverse#dca fanfic#solar lunacy#copper cogs rusted through#ccrt#staffbot au#lovebug au#love death and rollerskates#i wonder which y/ns wouldnt get along#need to sit on this idea a bit more#just wanted to throw it out there#dca fandom#this fandom has shaped me in so many ways#mostly good#some emotionally scarring#pointed stare at sleuth jesters#im shy and scared to tag the authors#go check them out!#eating their writing
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The audience can be heard from the platform under the stage. The cheering is loud, and there's no way to distinguish one scream from another. It's a normal night, if the crowd wasn't this loud it would be cause for concern, it's not like Amy needs to be able to hear specific voices anyway. Her parents haven't attended any of her shows in months, and her friends have their own schedules to work out.
Cream is next to her, the poor girl is crouching with her hands clutching her oversized rabbit ears. She's still so young she hasn't grown into them and the tips just barely drag on the floor. Amy already knows what Cream is going to say before she says it, her big round eyes squint as she cowers low to the ground.
“I… I don't wanna perform… I wanna go home…”
Amy just frowns and pats the rabbit girl's head. It's too late to call anything off now, they're both already in place and waiting for the platform under their feet to rise toward the stage. There's no help, there's no fixing, they just have to perform and muscle through it. Cream knows that, but she is only ten and logic doesn't appeal to her adolescent brain.
Amy herself is only fifteen, but she's been doing this for the past decade and has long past breakdowns or outbursts. If she broke down every time she had to do something she didn't want to do then she would never stop crying. Amy doesn't say that out loud, because that would be unhelpful and probably rude, but she still pets Cream hoping to give her some type of silent comfort.
The platform they're on jerks, and a few of the stage techs gesture to each other. If Cream doesn't get it together now there will be no performance to be had, refunds will have to be dished, and their managers will flip out. Amy would much rather perform on two broken legs than deal with their manager's punishment.
Cream obviously thinks the same, because she stands up just as the platform begins to rise–looking just a little sickly. The stage lights go out as the platform hits the top, just as they rehearsed, and Cream tilts her mic away to take a deep breath. They greet the audience in sync and the crowd goes absolutely wild.
It's showtime.
A short little thang for you. I don't write about Cream and Amy's dynamic a lot but I think of them frequently. I love them.
Feel free to hop into my ask box, I don't bite V●ᴥ●V
#sth#sonic the hedgehog#i have the mic#writing#amy rose#cream the rabbit#amy rose the hedgehog#amy the hedgehog#amy and cream#cream sonic#amy sonic the hedgehog#amy sonic#sonic au#sonic celeb au#im exhausted#bone apple teeth yall
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I think it's time to start writing Act Two: Lantern Town. The fic is getting restless in my head. It wants freedom and by golly it is going to get it. Question for my beloved mutuals and readers (even if we have never talked in our lives you are beloved and I want to give you cookies), would you like me to post WIP peeks as I write? Because that's a thing that I can do! (and I want to, but I'm shyyyy).
#sth#fanfiction#the rabbit writes#screaming my thoughts into the void#Our Lights In The Sky#the word count on this one is going to be a BITCH I can feel it in my bones
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well, all right i’m bad, but then you’re no prize either…
pair: joel miller x fem!reader
wc: 8.6k
contains: 18+ SMUT MDNI, no ellie, general violence (only referenced), age gap (56/26), swearing, so many spacers lmao, not quite friends to lovers and not quite enemies to lovers but a weird other thing, kinda mean!joel for a good sec, dressing wounds, joel miller TUMMY, loss of virginity (reader is a virgin but she's not completely oblivious and weirdly infantile about it lmao), fingering (fem!receiving), p in v, unprotected sex whoops, size kink, belly bulging, pussy pronouns, porn with a tiny plot, no use of y/n.
nat’s note: well, i finally caved y’all. baby’s first tlou fic! this literally took me forever to write and even longer to post cause i was so terrified LMAO so please give me some grace if it’s shit and he’s ooc and timelines are a little fuzzy cause i barely know what i’m doing. thank you chickens love you mwah mwah mwah. kisses!
dividers by lovely @saradika-graphics!
joel found a lodge house…
You don’t know what you did to make Joel Miller hate you so much.
He's never outright said it, but you know it’s there—in every sharp glance, every clipped word, every deliberate avoidance.
Besides, his silence is worse than anything he could say. A quiet condemnation that settles in your chest like stone.
You tell yourself it doesn’t matter, that you don’t care what he thinks, but the truth is harder to swallow.
You do care—more than you want to admit. His approval, his respect, hell, even a sliver of kindness from him feels like an impossible prize you’ll never win.
And you hate yourself for wanting it. For needing it.
It's not just the weight of his disdain that eats at you, it's the not knowing why. God, do you wish you could ask him why.
What did you do to make him look at you like you’re some necessary evil he has to tolerate. Why does he hold some unspoken grudge that's manifested itself into something you couldn't dream of ever comprehending.
But the thought of confronting Joel feels like standing on the edge of a cliff, staring down into a void that might swallow you whole.
So instead, you do what you've always done. You keep your distance, try to match his indifference with your own, and tell yourself it’s better this way.
You were young when the outbreak hit, six years old.
You’re sure that’s part of it. That that’s how Joel sees you, as some bumbling, naive child who’s more of a hassle than anything else.
Another mouth to feed, another back to watch, baggage.
You've been with him for almost seven months now, traveling side by side when you may have well been miles apart. Trekking through abandoned cities, overgrown highways, and every godforsaken patch of wilderness in between.
In the beginning, you did everything you could to prove him wrong.
You pushed yourself past your limits, hunted, scavenged, fought, kept up. You did everything that needed to be done without hesitation.
All to show that you were more than what he made you out to be. It never seemed to matter much.
After you lost your parents in the early days of the outbreak, it was just you and your sister. She taught you everything you know, taught you how to survive.
It's because of her that you know how to shoot a rifle, how to skin a rabbit, how to start a fire with nothing but sticks and dried moss, how to snap bones and locate which vital arteries bleed out the quickest.
It's because of her that you've been able to hone some sick skill in the maiming of clickers.
A skill you never thought you'd need to use on her.
You were supposed to be safe in the QZ. You weren't supposed to be fifteen years old, aiming a gun at the one person you had left.
Your own flesh and blood wasn't supposed to be the very first in a long list of red tallies under your belt.
It’s been years and you’ve still never forgotten that day. December 19th, 2012, the date burned into your brain like someone took a branding iron to the tissue.
You can’t count the amount of times you’ve been ripped from your sleep drenched in a cold sweat with the tail end of a scream tearing at the skin of your throat.
The image of what was left of your sister, slumped on the ground lifeless as her blood painted the wall behind her flashing behind your closed eyelids. The sound of her last labored breath ringing in your ears louder than any shotgun blast.
You ran that same night, with the weight of her death on your shoulders.
Your entire world spinning out around you as you clawed through barbed wire fencing, not caring where you were going or what would happen to you—just needing to escape.
There was nothing left for you to do after that but survive. And that’s what you did, for years, scraping by in a world that had already chewed you up and spit you out a mangled mess.
You learned how to be ruthless because of it.
How to harden yourself against the loss, the pain, the brutality. But there were cracks, too. Cracks you hid well, buried deep beneath layers of stubbornness and distance.
The endless days blurred into each other. Empty houses, hollow streets. A life reduced to scavenging, hiding, and the occasional, fleeting moment of human connection that inevitably ended in loss.
And then you found yourself with Joel.
You hadn’t exactly found him, though. More like crashed into his orbit by accident.
A few desperate days spent scavenging through the ruins of a small town, a chance encounter that left you both wary and unwilling to turn your backs.
But, inexplicably, you somehow became part of his traveling routine.
He wasn’t like any of the others you’d met before. At first, you thought he might be different. A man who seemed broken, but different nonetheless.
As the days turned into weeks, and weeks into months, you began to see the truth. Joel Miller wasn’t concerned with you. He didn’t need you. And, more than that, he didn’t want you around.
You didn’t know what to do with that.
It’s a bitter kind of irony. You’ve survived all this time completely on your own, fought tooth and nail to stay alive, but with him, you might just crumble.
Joel found a lodge house. It's a small, weathered place tucked away in the dense trees of the wood surrounding it.
He only deemed it suitable after an extensive perimeter check and a thorough sweep of the interior.
It's not much—just another run-down place in the middle of nowhere—but for the first time in what feels like forever, it’s a roof over your head for the night.
The walls are sturdy, though the windows are cracked and half of the floorboards creak like they're about to give out at any moment.
You explored the second floor alone, creeping through the desolate rooms and taking in all that was left behind.
Old family photographs covered in thick layers of dust, worn clothes riddled with holes still hung in the few closets you stumble across.
The oddest of all was an old jewelry box tucked away in a dresser draw, tarnished silver dull and muddy.
The sound of familiar footsteps comes from somewhere behind you. The door creaks open slowly.
Joel. Of course.
He clears his throat, the sound abrasive in the quiet of the house.
“Fire’s low,” he says, voice rough from its lack of use today.
You don’t turn around, not yet. You take the box in your gloved hand, running your fingers across the intricate design of the lid, touch trailing over winding vines and small roses.
“Okay,” you mutter, your voice coming out quieter than you intended. “I’ll grab some more wood later.”
Another beat of silence. Then, “It’s gettin’ cold out, I’ll go.”
Your fingers pause their ministrations, moving to flip the lid open. Empty.
“Suit yourself,” you reply after a moment, your tone just as neutral as his.
Joel doesn’t leave right away. You hear the floorboards groan beneath his weight, his presence lingering in the doorway.
You wonder what he’s waiting for, or if he’s waiting at all.
Finally, he speaks. “Don’t touch anything.”
With that he turns and leaves the room, you wait until you can’t hear his footsteps trailing down the stairs anymore to let out the scoff festering in your chest.
You snap the jewelry lid shut with a little more force than necessary. “Asshole.”
Joel's been gone for a while now. Longer than it takes to chop a few logs for firewood.
You came down from the upstairs a few minutes after hearing the tell-tale sound of the heavy door opening and closing. The main room is quiet, save for the soft crackle of the dwindling fire.
You're perched on an old armchair near the entrance, peering out the dirty window that has the best view of the treeline as you nervously pick the skin around your nails.
You tell yourself not to worry. He’s probably fine, he’s been doing this a lot longer than you. And if Joel is anything, it’s annoyingly competent.
Still, a nagging doubt itches at the back of your mind. It's been at least half an hour, maybe more.
You’re just about to grab your own pack and go looking for him when the front door creaks open.
Joel stumbles inside, the frigid evening air rushing in behind him before he slams the door shut. At first glance, he looks fine—no more haggard than usual.
But then you notice the way he favors his left side, the way his free hand is pressed against his ribs, blood seeping through his fingers and staining his torn undershirt.
You’re on your feet in an instant.
“Fuck,” you say, voice sharper than you expected. “What the hell happened?”
“Raiders.” Is the only explanation you get as he tries to brush past you like it’s nothing. The stiff way he moves and the tightens of his jaw betray him. “S’just a scratch.”
“Bullshit,” you snap, stepping in front of him and blocking his path to the fire. “Sit. Now.”
He gives you a look, one of those deep, withering glares you’ve seen him use to intimidate countless others into submission. But you stand your ground, chin raised and jaw set–defiant.
His stubbornness finally meeting its match in your own.
Finally, with a low growl of frustration, he drops onto the couch. “Happy now?”
"Not until you let me take care of that." You motion toward his side, where the blood is still spreading.
“I’m fine,” he mutters, lolling his head back to rest more heavily on the couch.
“Sure you are,” you snap, crossing the room to rifle through your bag. “And I’m the fucking Queen of England.”
"Said I’m fine," he bites through gritted teeth, but you’re already moving, heading back to him with the first aid kit from your pack.
"You want to bleed out on this ugly-ass couch? Be my guest," you shoot back, dropping to your knees in front of him. "Otherwise, shut up and let me help."
Joel surprisingly doesn’t argue any further, just sighs heavily and reluctantly sinks further into the couch cushions.
You push the front of his jacket open to slide it off his shoulders as gently as you can, peeling back the layer of his flannel next.
The smell of blood hits you immediately.
The gash is about five inches long, trailing the span of his ribcage. It’s deep—but not fatal—just an angry red and oozing blood.
Definitely not the simple 'scratch' he made it out to be.
Your stomach churns at the sight, but you push it down. No time for that.
“Jesus, Joel,” you mutter under your breath, reaching for the alcohol in your kit. “You really know how to underplay a situation, huh?”
He doesn’t respond, just watches you with those dark, calculating eyes of his. Always watching, always assessing.
It’s unnerving, but you focus on the task at hand, grabbing a clean cloth and soaking it with alcohol.
“This is gonna hurt,” you warn, though there’s a part of you that doesn’t mind the idea of causing him a little discomfort.
A petty, vindictive part that still stings from all the scorn he’s thrown your way.
“Just get it over with,” Joel grits out, his voice low and gravelly.
You don’t give him any more warnings as you wipe the soaked cloth over the wound. He flinches, a harsh curse slipping through clenched teeth, but he doesn’t pull away.
You work as quickly as you can, wiping away the blood and dirt with steady hands, your movements as gentle as possible given the situation.
You let out an annoyed huff when the torn fabric of his shirt gets in the way of your hands for a second time.
You lean back on your heels, glancing up at Joel. “You need to take your shirt off.”
Joel raises a brow at you, his lips pressing into a thin line. “That really necessary?”
“Yes, it’s necessary, Joel,” you huff, already losing patience. “Unless you want me to sit here and cut around every thread of this ratty thing while you bleed out, then by all means—”
He sighs heavily, cutting you off as he shifts forward and grabs the hem of his shirt. He tugs at the fabric, grunting in pain each time it strains his ribs.
You roll your eyes at how slow he’s moving, and your patience—already worn thin by the day's events—snaps.
“Jesus Christ, let me help,” you huff, reaching forward and grabbing the fabric.
Joel jerks back slightly, his hand shooting up to stop yours mid-motion. “I got it,” he growls, a sharp edge in his voice.
You glare at him, your hand still caught in his grip. His palm is calloused, his hold firm enough to make your pulse jump unexpectedly.
For a moment, the two of you just sit there, locked in a silent standoff.
Then he releases your hand and pulls the shirt over his head himself, wincing as the movement pulls at his side.
You wait with your arms crossed, trying to ignore the awkward flutter of nerves in your stomach as the fabric peels away to reveal his chest.
Joel’s broad, solid frame isn’t new to you. You’ve seen him shirtless before—brief glimpses when bathing in rivers or changing in run down houses between stops.
But this time feels different, more intimate somehow.
You’re staring, and you know it.
The firelight cast shadows over his skin, illuminating old scars, faint lines of muscle, the barely there jut of his stomach over the hem of his jeans.
You had been getting more game kills recently, two hunters are always better than one.
Joel clears his throat, dragging your focus back to the present. “You gonna gawk all night, or can we move this along?”
You snap out of it, scowling to cover your embarrassment. “Yeah, yeah. Don’t get your panties in a twist.”
You finish cleaning the gash and grab the small needle and thread lying next to you.
“This’ll hurt worse than the alcohol,” you say, threading the needle easily.
Joel snorts, a rare sound. “Figures.”
The needle pierces his skin, and this time, you catch the smallest hitch in his breath. He doesn’t make a sound, but his jaw tightens, the veins in his neck standing out like cords.
His hands grip the edge of the couch hard enough that his knuckles turn white with it, but he doesn’t tell you to stop or slow down.
He’s too damn proud for that.
You shift closer, your knee brushing against his leg as you position yourself to work from a better angle. You feel his eyes on you, that intense, scrutinizing stare that makes your skin prickle.
“You’ve done this before,” Joel says after a moment, his tone less sharp than before. It’s not quite a question, more of an observation.
You shrug, keeping your hands steady. “Of course I have.”
“Who taught you?”
The question catches you off guard, Joel’s never shown much interest in what your life was before you met him. You glance up briefly, catching his gaze. There’s no malice there, no judgment—just curiosity.
You swallow hard, dragging your eyes back to stitches, half way done now. “My sister.”
You don’t elaborate and Joel doesn’t push.
Maybe it’s the sudden tightness in your tone or the look you know must be clouding your face that keeps him quiet.
You finish off the stitching, tearing the thin strand of thread with your hands before you’re leaning away again.
“Good as new,” you say, dabbing some more alcohol on your own hands to disinfect. “Try not to tear these open anytime soon.”
Joel leans back, strong arms spread across the back of the couch, his face unreadable as he peers down at the fresh stitching on his side.
“Could’ve done it myself,” he mutters, but the edge in his voice is gone, replaced with something softer, almost resigned.
You roll your eyes with a scoff, not even trying to hide your irritation as you rise from the floor. “Sure you could’ve, right before you passed out. You’re welcome by the way.”
You gather your supplies and turn to head back to your bag, but Joel’s voice stops you in your tracks.
“You’re always like this, y’know,” he says, and the words carry that same gravelly drawl, but there’s something new there—something heavier.
You pause, your hands tightening around the kit in your grasp. “Like what?”
“Pushy. Stubborn,” he replies, his tone cutting, though it lacks the usual venom. “Like you’ve got somethin’ to prove all the damn time.”
You whip around, your patience officially gone. “You think I’m stubborn?” you shoot back, your voice rising. “Coming from the guy who would rather bleed out on a fucking couch than admit he needs help?”
Joel’s jaw tightens, and his hands flex against the couch cushions, but you don’t stop. Not now. Not after months of this.
“I’ve been busting my ass since day one to prove that I’m not dead weight to you. I’ve fought for us, for you. And for what? Just to get more of your bullshit attitude?”
“You don’t know what the hell you’re talkin’ about,” Joel snaps, pushing himself upright despite the obvious strain it puts on his freshly stitched wound. “You don’t know a goddamn thing about me.”
“Because you won’t let me!” you fire back, stepping closer, your voice rising. “All you do is look at me like I’m some burden you can’t wait to get rid of.”
Joel’s glare sharpens, his lips parting as if to respond, but you cut him off.
You really can’t stop yourself now that you started, all the anger and frustration reaching a fever pitch hot enough to burst the tight lid you’ve kept on your emotions.
“If I’m such a hassle, why didn’t you just leave me back there, huh? Why didn’t you just walk away like I know you wanted to?”
Joel’s breathing is heavier now, his broad chest rising and falling as his dark eyes bore into yours.
For a moment, he doesn’t say anything. Then, he stands, and the sheer size of him forces you to tilt your chin up slightly to keep your glare fixed on his face.
“You think I wanted this, kid?” he growls, his voice low and strained, like he’s barely holding himself together. “You think I wanted to be responsible for someone else? To have someone else’s fuckin’ life on me?”
“Don’t call me kid,” you spit, shoving a finger into his chest, ignoring the way his jaw ticks at the contact. “I’m not a fucking kid.”
He scoffs, casting his eyes to the ceiling disbelievingly. “Could’ve fooled me.”
“Fuck you, Joel,” you growl, fists clenching at your side. “If you hate me that much, why the hell are you still here? Why didn’t you tell me to fuck off the second you met me?”
“Because I couldn’t!” Joel snaps, booming voice filling the small space.
The confession slips out like it pains him. His fists clench at his sides, and for a moment, he looks like he might break something.
You’ve never been scared of Joel, even though you’ve seen first hand just how scary he can be.
Now, as he looms in front of you, eyes blazing and jaw working furiously beneath his skin, it’s the closest to scared you’ve felt.
“I’ve seen you out there,” he continues, tone low and dark. “You’ve got a fuckin’ death wish. You’re too damn stubborn to just stop, and I’m not gonna let you go so you can run off and get yourself fuckin’ killed.”
Your heart pounds in your chest, his words hitting far too close to home.
“I’m just trying to survive, Joel,” you snap, your voice shaking. “That’s what we do, isn’t it? Survive.”
“Survive,” Joel repeats bitterly, his gaze burning into yours. “That what you call it? Throwin’ yourself into every goddamn fight, gettin’ stabbed and shot right fuckin’ in front of me and expecting me to brush that shit off?”
You let out a humorless laugh, nodding your head exasperatedly. “Yes, yes I do expect you to just brush it off, because that’s what you always do.”
“Well I can’t,” he grates out, taking a step closer. “I can’t ‘cause despite whatever it is that you may think about me, I don’t hate you. I care about you too damn much and that's my goddamn problem.”
That shuts you up, your mouth snapping closed with a sharp click of your teeth as you stare at him, shocked.
Joel holds your gaze, lips pressed into a thin line. “That what you wanted to hear?”
It’s in that moment that the fire finally fizzles out, the dull hiss of it the only sound left in the room.
You’re quiet for a beat, stunned into silence. The heat of his anger, his frustration, it radiates off him, and you realize suddenly that this isn’t just about you.
It never was.
“Then show me,” you challenge softly, your heart pounding in your chest. “Show me that you don’t hate me.”
Joel’s eyes darken, his head cocking to the side as he searches your face for a sign. You don’t say anything, you only square your shoulders and raise your chin, your eyes just as hard as his own.
“I want you to prove it.”
The tension snaps like a rubber band stretched too far.
You shouldn’t—this shouldn’t—happen. Not like this. Not after everything that’s been said.
But when Joel’s lips crash against yours, hot and desperate and urgent, it makes everything blur into nothing.
It’s not gentle, not soft—this is anger and longing and frustration all wrapped into one. It’s messy, frantic, like a fight that’s been brewing for too long.
He grips your arm, pulling you closer, almost too roughly, but it feels like it’s everything you’ve both been avoiding.
His other hand moves to cup the back of your neck, grounding you as his lips press harder against yours, like he’s trying to pour everything he can’t say into this single moment.
You respond just as fiercely, nails digging into the skin of his shoulders as you kiss him back with all the pent-up emotion that’s been simmering beneath the surface.
The coarse hair of his beard scrapes against the skin of your chin deliciously, the scent of blood and firewood filling your senses as his arm wraps around your waist, dragging you impossibly closer.
Close enough that you can feel the wild beat of his heart booming against your chest.
You pull away for a second, breathless, both of you looking at each other, your eyes wide and pupils blown.
“Goddamn it,” Joel mutters, his voice thick with frustration and something else you can’t place. He presses his forehead to yours, the deep brown of his eyes dark than before. “What the hell are we doing?”
You don’t have an answer. You’re not sure if you even want one.
You reach for him again, arms looping around his neck to drag his mouth back to yours.
This kiss is nothing like the first, it isn’t a clash of frustration–it’s filthier, rawer. A near feral thing, all teeth and tongue, a surge of hunger and need that borders on violence.
Joel groans into your mouth, a low, guttural sound that sends a shiver racing down your spine. His teeth catch your bottom lip, pulling just hard enough to make you gasp.
He takes advantage of the sound, his tongue sweeping into your mouth to slide against yours with wet, messy desperation, like he’s trying to claim every inch of you.
The taste of him—salt and iron and something distinctly Joel—makes your head spin.
Your fingers knot into the chocolaty curls at the nape of his neck, surprisingly soft to the touch. His own hands roam the soft curves of your body, rough and insistent, like he can’t decide where he wants to touch you most.
“Joel—” His name spills from your lips like a plea, and he answers with a deep, guttural noise that sends heat pooling low in your belly. His tongue follows the path of his teeth, soothing the bites with lazy, deliberate strokes that make your knees weak.
You’re moving before you even realize it. Joel dragging you across the room and down onto the couch with him, using the strength he’s built up after all these years to manhandle you until your thighs are spread wide on either side of his lap.
“Joel,” you gasp again, rearing back enough to break the kiss. “Your stitches–”
He cuts you off with a sharp nip to the sensitive spot behind your ear, tearing a high whine from your throat. “Can hardly feel ‘em.”
You make a displeased sound, but it’s undermined by the way you tilt your head to give his wandering lips more room. His hands find a home on your hips, one slipping beneath your shirt to press against the soft skin of your stomach.
His fingers splay wide across your skin, his palm callused and rough. His pinky just barely brushes the underside of your breast, and you’re suddenly rearing back.
“Wait,” you say, your voice barely a whisper.
Joel’s hands immediately loosen their grip on your hips, his brows knitting together in concern. “You okay?”
You nod quickly, your heart pounding in your chest. “I just...I need to tell you something.”
His jaw tightens slightly, but he stays quiet, waiting for you to speak.
You take a beat, chewing at the skin of your bottom lip nervously.
“I’ve never...” You pause, swallowing hard as your cheeks heat up. “I’ve never done this before. I mean, I’ve never been with anyone like this.”
Joel pulls back slightly, his expression unreadable as he processes your words. For a moment, you think he might pull away completely, but then he exhales a long, slow breath.
“Christ,” he mutters, scrubbing a hand down his face. “You’re tellin’ me this now?”
“I didn’t exactly plan for this to happen,” you snap back, crossing your arms over your chest defensively. “It’s not like I had the luxury of a high school sweetheart to pop my cherry out here.”
Joel’s gaze softens at your tone, and he reaches out to cup your cheek, his thumb brushing against your skin. “Hey, hey, I didn’t mean it like that.”
You glance away, suddenly feeling self-conscious under the weight of his stare. “I just...I wanted you to know. But I want this, Joel. I want you.”
His thumb stills against your cheek, and he swallows hard, his adam’s apple bobbing as he considers your words.
“I don’t...” He pauses, the most hesitant you’ve ever heard him. “I don’t want to hurt you.”
It’s the most vulnerable he’s been around you, round eyes shining with something so raw and so earnest it makes your heart ache in your chest.
“You won’t,” you insist, your voice steady despite the nerves fluttering in your stomach. “I trust you.”
Joel’s jaw clenches, and for a moment, he looks like he’s going to argue. But then he nods, his shoulders relaxing as he cups the back of your neck, pulling you closer until your foreheads touch again.
“At least let me do this right,” he murmurs, his voice so soft you almost don’t hear it. “Not here. Not on some goddamn couch.”
You blink up at him, surprised by the tenderness in his tone. “What?”
“Upstairs,” he says, his thumb tracing lazy circles against the side of your neck. “There’s a bed up there. It ain’t much, but it’s better than this.”
You can’t do anything but nod, your pulse racing beneath your skin fast enough to combat the cold night air seeping through the walls.
“Okay,” you say softly, voice barely above a whisper. “Upstairs.”
Joel stands, gently pulling you to feet and taking your hand in his. He leads you upstairs, each step feeling heavier with anticipation. The small bedroom is dimly lit, the faint glow of moonlight filtering through a broken blind.
The bed isn’t much—an old mattress on a worn frame, covered with a patched-up blanket—but it doesn’t matter.
Joel shuts the door behind you, the sound of the latch clicking into place sending a shiver down your spine.
“Last chance,” he says, his voice a low rumble. “You say the word, and we stop. No questions asked.”
Your throat tightens at the sincerity in his tone, the way he’s giving you an out even though you can see the strain in every line of his body, the way his hands flex at his sides like he wants nothing more than to reach out and touch you.
But you don’t hesitate.
You step closer, placing your hands on his bare chest. You bite back a smile at the goosebumps that break out all along his skin at your touch.
“Jesus, Miller,” you mumble teasingly, nails lightly scratching through the salt and pepper hair scattered along his chest. “How long are you gonna drag this out before you get it through your thick skull that I want to fuck you?”
"Christ." Joel huffs, shaking his head as the corners of his lips turn up in a small grin. “Like I fuckin’ said,” he starts, big hands kneading the meat of your hips. “Pushy.”
Joel walks you backward until the backs of your knees hit the edge of the bed, and you fall onto it with a soft gasp.
He follows you immediately, crawling over you, his body covering yours, his weight a comforting pressure. “I’ll take care of you,” he murmurs, his lips brushing yours. “I’ll make it good for you, I swear.”
His fingers are everywhere, unbuttoning your shirt with a practiced ease that has your pulse racing. His lips follow the path of his hands, each touch a branding mark, each kiss leaving you wanting more.
“Pretty girl,” he mutters softly, pressing a kiss right between the valley of your breasts.
You feel his cock stirring against your stomach, and it makes the ache between your legs flare to life, the weight of it, the hardness of it, driving you crazy with need.
You want him so badly you can barely think straight, but when his lips graze over your collarbone, you can’t stop the quiet whine that escapes your throat.
Joel growls in response, a sound that resonates deep in his chest, and you know then that he’s as far gone as you are. His hands slide down to the waistband of your pants, tugging them down your legs with urgency.
As your skin is exposed to the cool air, you can feel the heat of his gaze on you, like he’s memorizing every inch of you.
“You’re fuckin' perfect,” he mutters, his voice thick with desire.
Joel's hands find your thighs, parting them with a deliberate slowness that makes your breath catch in your throat. He positions himself between your legs, his body weight pressing you into the mattress, his chest rising and falling with the same frantic rhythm as yours.
The anticipation is almost unbearable as his fingers trace the line of your panties, the fabric damp with want.
“Jesus, she’s drippin’ for me already,” he mutters, voice rough, as he slides the material to the side, his thumb brushing over the sensitive swell of your clit.
Your body jerks at the contact, a desperate sound escaping your lips, but Joel doesn’t relent.
“You touch yourself down here, baby?” he asks, working tortuously slow circles over your clit.
"Please," you beg, your hands grasping at the sheets, pulling at them as if they can anchor you to the moment.
He looks up at you, his gaze dark and filled with an intensity that makes your stomach tighten. “Asked you a question, honey.”
You whine, high and loud in your throat as your thighs clench desperately around his wrist. “Yes, I touch myself.”
Joel’s lips curl into a satisfied grin, sliding his thick index finger through the messy wetness to slip inside your clenching hole, making you gasp. Your hands grasp at the sheets, pulling at them as if they can anchor you to the moment.
“Good girl,” he breathes, eyes darkening at the broken moan that bursts from your lips. “When’s the last time you touched yourself?”
Your brain feels hazy as you search for the answer, pleasure clouding your mind slow and sweet as molasses. “A–a few nights ago.”
Joel hums idly, slipping a second finger alongside the first. The stretch has you whining, his fingers a lot more to take than your own.
Your hands come up to claw at his shoulders, relishing in the way his broad muscle ripples and shifts beneath your greedy palms.
“Joel,” you whine, hips canting down against his hand impatiently.
He just shushes you softly, free hand brushing soothing circles along the skin of your inner thigh. “I know, honey,” he mutters, the pace fingers speeding up. “But I gotta get her nice and ready if you wanna take my cock.”
The gush of your pussy around his fingers is loud in the stillness of the room, a filthy wet noise that burns your ears each time he plunges them into your aching hole.
“I am ready.” Your breath hitches as your body begins to tremble beneath him. “Please, Joel—fuck—please, I need—”
“Need what?” His voice is thick with dark amusement, but there's a hunger in his eyes that has your stomach twisting. “Tell me, baby. What do you need?”
“I need you,” you rasp, your nails digging little crescent moons into his skin, your body pleading for release. “I need you inside me.”
Your hands grab at his hair, pulling him back up to meet your lips in a feverish kiss.
The pressure of his body on yours, the way his hard cock grinds against your trembling thigh, drives you to the brink of madness.
Your hands trail down his chest, past the waistband of his jeans, finally reaching the bulge straining against the fabric.
Joel groans when you rub him through his pants, feeling his cock twitch in response. He pulls back, breathing heavily, his lips curling into a smirk.
“Yeah?” he asks, his voice thick with lust. “You want my cock in this pretty pussy? Want me to show you how good it feels to be fucked?”
“God, yes,” you answer, desperation lacing your tone as your hand moves to unbuckle his jeans. “Want it so bad.”
He lets you push his pants down just enough to free his cock, and you gasp, your eyes drawn to the way his length stands, thick and hard, just waiting for you. The tip flushed an angry red, drooling pre-come onto the scratchy sheets.
Joel pulls his fingers from you, using his hands spreading your legs wider, positioning himself between them with such careful precision that you can barely stand it.
The head of his cock drags through the mess between your legs, slipping all the way down till it catches on your soaked entrance.
Joel pauses, looking down at you, waiting for your signal, but the only answer you give is a pleading whimper, your hands pulling at his shoulders, urging him to move.
His mouth captures yours once again as he slowly slides into you, the stretch of his cock filling you steadily, making you gasp into his mouth.
The slow burn of him carving a place for himself inside of you is almost too much, your body trembling as you adjust to the feeling of him.
“Fuck, baby,” Joel mutters against your lips. “You’re so tight, so fuckin’ perfect for me.”
As he sinks deeper into you, his thick cock finally buried to the hilt inside of you, the feeling is overwhelming. You gasp, nails digging into his back as the pain slowly shifts into pleasure.
Joel groans into your mouth, his hands moving to your hips, guiding you as he rocks gently against you.
The rhythm is slow at first, deliberate, as if he's savoring every inch of you. Your body quivers beneath him, every inch of your skin tingling with sensation. You clutch at him, your legs tightening around his waist, needing more, wanting more.
"That's it," he murmurs, his voice thick with desire. "Take it, baby."
You screw your eyes shut tightly, trying to steady yourself as he thrusts deeper, harder. The angle shifts just enough to make your breath catch in your throat.
Every stroke feels like it’s hitting the deepest part of you, sparking heat in places you never knew could burn so hot.
"Fuck," you gasp, the sensation too overwhelming, too much in the best way. "Joel... please..."
"Please what, sweetheart?" He pulls back slightly, teasing you with a slow roll of his hips before driving back in with a grunt.
Your nails dig into his shoulders, urging him to move faster, harder. "Don’t stop," you breathe, your voice trembling. "I need you to fuck me, Joel. Faster. Harder. Please."
The sound of skin slapping against skin fills the room as Joel finally picks up the pace, each thrust harder and deeper than the last.
Your back arches off the bed, chest pressing flush to his as your body coils tighter and tighter, already so close to the edge.
Joel reaches up to take your wrist in his, dragging your hand down to press flat against your lower stomach.
“Feel that?” he asks breathlessly, the speed of his hips knocking the dingy bed frame into the wall with every thrust. “You feel how deep I am?”
His own hand blankets yours, pushing down so you can feel the way his cock punches up against your palm on the next thrust.
Your pussy clenches desperately around him at the feeling, your slick lips dropping open on a loud moan.
You can barely hold on. The heat in your stomach tightens, coiling painfully as your free hand scrambles to find purchase on his skin. "I can't—I'm gonna—"
He grits his teeth, his jaw clenched as he drives deeper, pushing you closer and closer to the edge. "Come for me, baby," he growls, his voice dark and commanding. "Let me feel it."
With a strangled cry, you finally release, your body clenching around him, every nerve igniting in a white-hot explosion of pleasure.
You’re lost in it, your world spinning, your senses overwhelmed by the sensation of Joel’s body pounding into yours, the way his cock brushes against that sweet spot behind your clit enough to make sparks go off behind your eyelids.
Joel pulls out of your velvety warmth, hand coming up to fist his dripping length until he’s bowing over you tightly and coming with a deep groan of your name.
His release paints your stomach with milky strands of white, rope after rope of warm come claiming you in a way no one has before.
He finally collapses against you with one last shuddering breath, both of you breathing heavily, your chests rising and falling together in the quiet aftermath.
For a few moments, neither of you speaks, the only sounds are the soft creak of the bed and the quiet hum of your racing hearts.
Joel rests his head against your shoulder, his breath warm against your skin, and you can feel the tension begin to slip away, the weight of everything that’s happened between you both settling into something new—something different, but still there.
Your hand slips down the sweaty expanse of your stomach, your fingers swiping through the sticky mess of his release curiously.
“Christ, quit that,” Joel groans, tearing his eyes away from the sight to press his forehead against your shoulder.
“Why?” you hum, brow raised in amusement as you drop your hand back to the mattress. “Can you even get it up again?”
Joel pinches your side hard enough to make you squeal, your body flinching away from him as a surprised laugh bubbles from your chest.
“Watch it,” he warns, though there’s no bite to his tone. You only laugh in response.
The two of you settle into a comfortable silence, wrapped in each other as crickets chirp from outside the window.
Then Joel clears his throat, fingers idly tracing different shapes on the skin of your hip as he gathers the courage to speak.
A circle, a square, a diamond, a circle, a heart, a heart, a heart.
“I’m…” he starts, trailing off softly. “I’m sorry. I’ve been a real fuckin’ prick, and you didn’t deserve it. You never did.”
You turn your own gaze to his chest, hand coming up so you can trail your fingers along the jagged scar decorating his shoulder. Your touch featherlight over the rough patch of skin.
All the anger seeps from your body, a heavy weight gone until you feel so light you could float off the mattress and into the cold night air.
“It’s okay,” you whisper softly, so soft you think it gets lost in the quiet darkness of the room. “I understand now.”
And for the first time in what feels like forever, you both just lay there, tangled in each other, not worrying about the world outside, about the chaos that waits.
Just you, him, and the soft glow of moonlight.
tags are now in the comments! if you want to get tagged for any of my works just fill out this form!
mini nat's note: should i add joel to my taglist...i do kinda want to write more for him in the future but i'm not sure yet...lmk chickens <3 bee tee dubs sorry the ending absolutely sucks i could not for the life of me figure out how to end this LMAO
#— 𝘯𝘢𝘵𝘢𝘭𝘪𝘢 𝘸𝘳𝘪𝘵𝘦𝘴 ♡#ᯓ★ 𝐧𝐚𝐭'𝐬 𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐥 𝐣𝐨𝐞𝐥 𝐦𝐢𝐥𝐥𝐞𝐫!#natalia cant write anything under 1.000 words#pls be sweet to me#i'm so nervous to post this lmao#love you!#joel miller x reader#joel miller x you#joel miller x female reader#joel miller x y/n#joel miller fic#joel miller smut#tlou x reader#tlou x you#tlou fic#tlou smut#the last of us x reader#the last of us x you#the last of us smut#pedro pascal x reader#pedro pascal x you#pedro pascal x y/n#pedro pascal smut
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IM NORMAL ABT THEM I SWEAR I JUS WANT TO DRAW THEM BEING CUTE N HAPPY UNTIL TH END OF TIME OK
CRYING WEEPING OVER TH WAY U WRITE AND HOW U CHARACTERIZE THEMS THIS IS THE MF DREAMMMMM I LOVE U
it was yOOOUUUU WHO SENT THOSE FICS IN ANONYMOUSLY!!!!!! IVE GOT U IN MY GOTDAM SIGHTS NOW BITCH
“My Little Treasure”
Pairing - Pirate!Eclipse X SeaMonster!Reader
Word Count - 356
Oneshot is based off an AU by the lovely @bones-of-a-rabbit, who made the below art. I’m absolutely obsessed with their AUs, check them out.
PS: The Little Mermaid gets referenced in this story, I’m referring to the original story by Hans Christian Andersen since it fits the story better and also because I didn’t know how to have them watch a Disney animated movie on a Pirate Ship because I’m a fraud.
Enjoy and please send some oneshot requests so I have content to steal create :D
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Art from this post : https://www.tumblr.com/bones-of-a-rabbit/708610101895987200/being-regularly-but-unexpectedly-doused-with-sea
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“Clipse?”
“Yes, my little treasure?”
Eclipse puts down the dust-coated map he had been studying, carefully placing it on a wooden table decorated with various stolen goods and weapons.
“Can ask you a question?”
Eclipse walks over carefully, draping himself over the large armchair his darling was seated at.
“Anything, my sea star.”
“Would you love me more if I was still a Selkie?”
Eclipse froze slightly from the sudden question, he knew that his beloved was very conscious of their monstrous appearance but this was still quite out of the blue. He gently picked them off the armchair, sliding himself onto the chair with them on his lap.
“Now where would you get such a silly idea, treasure?”
“This.”
His love pointed towards a page on the book they had been reading, the Little Mermaid, as Eclipse had suggested to them earlier. Eclipse gently plucked the book out of their hands, examining the page. The page was torn and was a horrid shade of yellow, but the text was still legible.
“Mermaid is so beautiful, yet Prince does not marry her. If I am a monster, how do you like me?”
Eclipse's heart ached at the thought, bringing his precious closer to him. He put the book aside on a nearby table, holding them close.
“My treasure, I love you no matter what. I’m not like some snobbish prince, who just chooses the prettiest one. I love you for who you are.”
His beloved chuckled at the playful insult towards the prince, sending butterflies into Eclipse’s stomach. God, what he would do to see them happy. He caressed their cheek, bringing them in for a kiss.
“You’re beautiful, love.”
His darling smiled happily, leaning into his embrace. Eclipse chuckles, wrapping his arms around them as the room turned so silent, the only noise was the tides of the sea and squabbling crew members above on the deck.
“There’s still some time before we reach McDonough Island for our next plunder, you want to lie in bed with me? I can’t imagine this old chair being too comfortable.”
You’d like that.
You’d like that very much.
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#fanfic#oneshot#fanfic of a fanfic#bones of a rabbit au#writing to be adored#sea monster au#sea monster and pirate#fanfic short#fluff and angst#gotdam i love them#i am tattooing this on my face as we speak#eclipse holding sea monster in his lap in big comfy chair......... im sobbing your honor
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Tumblrinas prey animals
#36.txt#literally irl doing the anime pose kicking my feet in the air writing this like some kind of cartoon character#also by this i mean the anxieties and the horrors and the being able to surive the hostile conditions and the. everything#something something rabbits can kick hard enough to break certain bones iirc
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Extremely self-indulgent. For the neurodivergent girlies. English isn't my first language, so my apologies for any mistake. I also have no idea how to write a Scottish accent 🧘🏻♀️ bear with me
You knocked on the dark hardwood door as you've had done plenty of times before.
It has been almost six months since you've signed that contract. That one, the one where you forfeited 4 years of your life in exchange for stable wages and proper housing.
For someone with no life, no family and no friends (besides the online weirdos you'd talk to from time to time), that was kinda good, if you could say so yourself.
You had stability, even though it came with the cost of being tied down to a military base chock-full of people who didn't really understand you.
That was fine though. THAT, you were used to. It comes with the neurodivergence: the side eyes, the whispers and the isolation.
What you weren't used to, however, was how your heart would race like a rabbit on a run for its life whenever you knocked on that one door. And you had to knock on it quite a lot of times.
You rapped your knuckles against the hardwood once more when you got no reply, cracking the door open just a little bit to peek inside.
"Cap?" You said, voice almost a whisper. After a few seconds, you heard an answer.
"Come in, love. Didn't know it was you." A strong, booming voice came from inside and you swallowed the lump on your throat that always formed whenever you had to go to Price's office.
Not because you were afraid of him, no. On the contrary. Maybe Price and the rest of the task force were the only ones who didn't treat you like an aberration – probably because they were aberrations of their own merit.
Maybe it was stupid of you to get giddy over being treated well by some of your coworkers, but when the bare minimum was so rare, you latched onto it like a dog with a bone.
And in spite of yourself, you couldn't control your own heart. It would be racing like a schoolgirl with a crush whenever you went to visit any of the men from the task force. You gave up on trying to tame it.
"Hi Cap" you said, with a small smile, approaching his desk. On the corner of your eyes, you saw the other three burly men that made up 141 and waved.
"Hey, lass, good ta see ya!" Soap hollered, voice loud as ever. You could probably feel it vibrating inside your bones if he spoke for a little longer and you loved it; as much as you envied it. What wouldn't you do to be just a little bit outgoing like that? Maybe things would be just a tad easier.
"How can I help my favorite secretary?" Price asked, the corner of his eyes wrinkling as he smiled, crow's feet getting a lot more pronounced in a way you probably thought of more than you should.
You scoffed, rolling your eyes.
"I'm your only secretary."
"Doesn't make my statement any less true."
You shook your head and placed a manila folder in front of him.
"I need your autograph, Cap."
"What for?"
"Because I'm your biggest fan and I wanna put it on my refrigerator...?" You answered humorously, and Price raised an eyebrow. You sighed. "We need to authorize the training of a few new recruits and they need your approval. So I need you to sign it."
Price huffed out a low chuckle and began leafing through the needlessly thick document. You poked your finger into the folder, fishing out the last pages, and walked towards the other men sitting on the other side of the office.
"I like today's dress, love." Gaz was manspreading on one of Price's armchairs, head resting on his palm as he gave you an once over. If it were anyone else, you'd probably hate the way you were being perceived – it usually made you feel like a bug being watched through a magnifying glass. But under his gaze, you just felt like a doll being admired.
"Do you, now? It's one of my favorites." You bowed dramatically while holding the hem of the dress. It was just another one of the black frilly dresses that you wore like a signature. It flew around you as you spun on your feet to show the black ribbon on the back.
"Adorable as always. If I wasn't selfish, I would say it's wasted inside this base, but I like to have you around way too much." His eyes gleamed with mirth and, in any other situation, you'd think he was secretly mocking you – but not Kyle. Not any one of them. You knew the compliments were genuine, even if they didn't understand why you insisted on sticking out like a sore thumb when it brought you so many problems.
You knew they would never really understand how masking could hurt you, but you were grateful they still defended your decision on just being yourself.
"Look at tha' key on yer neck." Soap pointed at your necklace. "I ken what's tha' for. It's the key to my heart, aye?" He said with an exaggerated wink and a smile that could blind you.
"Yeah, yeah, whatever you say." You rolled your eyes, smiling, and pushed a paper into his hand and did the same with Gaz and Ghost.
"I need your autographs as well. You heard my explanation already."
" 'm not built for a life of fame, love." Simon grunted, shifting on his seat right beside Soap.
"Too late, the spotlight already found you. Now you gotta give me your autograph or I'm gonna cancel you on social media."
He huffed.
"Don't ya think I should have been canceled a long time ago?"
"Probably." You shrugged, and handed him a pen. "I like my favorites problematic, what can I say."
Soap barked out a laugh, mindlessly scanning the document and Ghost merely shook his head.
"Do I gotta sign this? Don't really feel like training new runts." The masked man muttered and you shrugged.
"Don't shoot the messenger. I don't really want new young men around me either." You walked back towards Price's desk after collecting the documents and placed them neatly inside the folder after he was done surveying every single fine print.
"What do you guys want for lunch?" You asked as you tucked the documents under your arm. Price clicked his tongue.
"You don't have to keep bothering with making food for us, love. We can all eat at the canteen like everyone else." The older man leaned back on his chair, folding his arms.
You looked to the side, with a small pout on your lips.
"But if I make you guys' lunch, then I can emotionally blackmail you into eating with me at the kitchen." You mumbled, avoiding any and all eye contact.
"So it was all a ploy to keep us nearby? I thought you were doing that because you liked us. I'm so hurt, dear." Kyle spoke up from his seat, a dramatic hand over his chest as he leaned his head back. You put a hand over your mouth, hiding your grin.
"Maybe I'm just learning a thing or two from hanging around tacticians?"
"Aw, Captain, come on. How can we leave the poor doll hangin'? And we get ta eat actually good food, not that canteen slop! Come on!"
Price sighed, shaking his head in defeat.
"Anything you make will be great, love."
"As long as it has proteins and carbs." Ghost added from his seat and you snickered. He had already seen you eating your comfort foods before and, needless to say, he didn't approve of them.
"As long as it has proteins and carbs." Price repeated, with a nod.
"Proteins and carbs, okay, got it." You said with a fierce nod, walking back towards the door to the older man's office. "Meet you guys at the kitchen?"
"1200, sharp." Price said, with eyes as soft as the smile under his moustache. You gave him a small salute on your way out.
"Yessir."
This will probably be a little anthology of scenes I think of, involving poly!141 x neurodivergent reader who works for them as a secretary. They might not have much continuity but I'm using this as a self-healing, self-indulgent blog, separated from my main. Expect mostly fluff and angst from me.
#141 x reader#poly 141 x reader#johnny soap mactavish x reader#simon riley x reader#kyle gaz garrick x reader#john price x reader#call of duty x reader#cod fluff#call of duty fluff
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the sun's lullaby & the moon's symphony
max verstappen
cw: smut/pwp, rivals au, photography, snark & sass, enemies to lovers (i guess), parental issues, secret relationship, talks of marriage & children, cowgirl position, admissions of love, long fic
this bunny runs on comments, reblog & tags! do you part to feed the bunny! (this was a thrill to write, i've been writing a lot of rivals au, so feel free to suggest your own! i also still have my bakery series going on, so feel free to order up. love ya'll)
this all started when you were teens. stubborn and stupid. the two prodigies of racing of two different stories. the moon, who was raised from birth to be the god of racing. and the sun, who emerged from nothing and up towards the sky to claim her rightful spot as a champion of the track.
the sun and the moon. you and max verstappen
so when you shared your first kiss with him at sixteen over a stolen a bottle of wine from your parent's fridge. you knew that you'd be forever link to the other driver.
it was over dinner in monaco, the lighting of the place was low. and max was seated across from you. occasionally his foot would rub up against your ankle.
you looked at him over the glass of wine in your hand, "you're not going to make me say it."
he smiled as he swallowed his bite of food, "why, prefer to tell me in private?" belgium was a great weekend for him, opposed to you. max sailed into second while you dragged behind in eighth.
but even at dinner, you'd never give the red bull driver the benefit, you'd rather have your bones wrung out of you like liquid in a rag than admit that max was good at racing. that would be the final pump of his ego that he'd go sailing away.
you put your glass down and rested your chin on your interlocked fingers, "maxie." you fluttered your eyelashes at him, "maybe if you came in first, i'd actually have something to congratulate you on." you reached across the small table and touched the inside of his wrist, you looked at the part of exposed flesh then to his face once more. you pouted at him, "second is the first place of losers."
he gave you a sarcastic smile before he took his wrist away, "and what about you, i thought you were supposed to be the rabbit on the track. out racing all of us. i guess daddy's money can only buy so much talent."
"you're a fucking dick, verstappen."
he shrugged, "and yet, you can't get enough of me. a glutton for punishment you are." his eyebrows knitted together as he frowned for a moment, "i think you're just trying to find daddy's approval, except that fucker won't give it to you. just like you won't give me what i want." he reached for you and cupped the side of your face. it was moments like these you remembered how big his hands were, "break the cycle, rabbit. be a good girl."
you pulled away from him, you heard the shutter of a camera and you both looked over. you grimaced, perfect. another photo to the collection of you and max in compromising positions. without context you looked like a pair on a date. you could already read out the statement you'd have to make if this all got a little too big.
you kicked max under the table, "good job, dickhead." your voice was painfully low.
he kicked you back, but not as hard, "you started it."
this night would end the same. the photo would go semi-viral. you'd have to lay low on social media for a few days. wash, rinse, repeat when you two eventually fuck up again. and like every other dinner together, it ended up with you two in his bed. those broad hands all over your back as you rode him. you held his face and looked down at him as you bounced your hips.
photographic evidence of you two together were vast, spanning close to ten years at that point. you both met in your carting days, with promises to make it to formula one. the photos only got more intense once you both entered the league.
they ranged from the two of you at a party together, or sneaking out a club holding hands. there was one of you on his boat, handing him a drink and what looked like him kissing you on the cheek. there were tons of his arm around you and your face buried in his broad chest. over the years the "evidence" had been piling up to suggest that you two were a couple.
if that was true, then why did you want to strangle max verstappen?
you stalked towards his driver's room after the dutch grand prix and opened the door without knocking. you felt fury in your bones as he looked at you. you put your hands on his throat and got close up into his face.
"you fucking asshole, you really are the devil aren't you, max?" you snapped. you weren't choking him, but rather holding him as a sign of dominance.
he grabbed your wrists and said, "and you're going to kill me now? i didn't think choking was your style." then pulled your hands away from his throat, "people might get the wrong idea if you start leaving marks."
"you ran me off the track. you knew what you were doing when you cut me off like that. you think you're so slick there, verstappen. is it because you're old man was there? wanted to show off to the pathetic excuse of a driver! fuck you, max. i didn't need the dnf because you needed to be a show off to daddy dearest, you piece of shit!" you knew you were just ranting, you sounded like a rambling mess but you wanted to win this.
through your rambling, he leaned in and kissed you on the lips, he didn't move when you tried to hit him in the chest. when he pulled away he held you by the back of the head, "it's all part of the game. you told me you'd rather be flayed than have me go easy on you. i'm treating you like every other driver. don't get mad."
you took a heavy breath before you pulled him in and kissed him on the mouth once more. he smirked against the kiss and wrapped his arms around you tightly. he held you close to him as you passionately made out with him.
when you pulled away, he said, "feel better now?"
you gripped onto the front of his shirt and deeply exhaled, "i could kill you and get away with it." then looked at him. his blue eyes always seemed to stare right into your soul. because maybe you two were bound by your souls, meant to exist in each other's orbit until the day you die.
he loosely kept his arms around you waist and pressed his forehead up against you, "i know. and i'd happily die by your hand." when he was tender like this, you wanted to bite his head off. but instead you simply let him hold you.
"you're an ass, verstappen." you muttered as you clung to the front of his uniform, "i hate that you know me so well and can get under my skin so easily."
he chuckled and held you closer, "i'm pretty sure you can map out every scar on my body and where i got it."
"like that time i accidentally stabbed you in the rib with a corkscrew." you said.
he nodded, "yeah and that time i fell down your stairs at your old home and you, me and charles had to figure out if my foot was broken."
you looked up at him and pressed your chin against his chest to look up at his face, "you really should've gone to the doctor for that. like two of your toes were purple."
"i lived." he then held you face for a brief moment before there was a knock on the door and you two stepped back from one another. he patted you on the arm before he shuffled you to the couch to act more casual than what you were just doing.
at least no one took any photos of you moment of romantic intimacy. in all fairness, what photos the press had of the two of you. was nothing compared to the photos max personally had of the two of you. everything from you in his driver's suit with nothing underneath (and the zipper open), to videos of you giving him head. he even had a video you took of him eating you out.
max had mapped every inch of skin with his lips and tongue over the years. from the plane of your back to behind your ear, the back of your knee and in between your legs. he could probably trace your body from memory with his lips. there was a likely chance you could do the same about him.
it continued on into the last night in the netherlands. the room max was staying in was lovely. you assumed only the best for the country's golden boy. you had come over after dinner and max was more than happy to see you.
you were seated by the big window with your feet propped up against the window ledge. in your hand was a glass of wine and you felt content watching the city go by as night hung in the sky. max was in the shower, so you were keeping yourself company.
you heard the shower turn off and you put the glass of wine down on the window ledge before he came out. even now, seeing max's cock made you look away to preserve some modesty.
you hoped that your expression didn't give it away. as he walked out naked with him rubbing the towel in his hair. to see him so exposed made your heart jump.
"like what you see?" he asked. he went over to the bed and got onto it, "i'm sorry for keeping you waiting."
you shot him a look, "i can't believe you convinced me to do this. is this a way for you to inflate your ego even more? you won this race and now you want to stick your cock in the one you drove off the track! and you didn't even get punished for it!" you wanted to stop your foot like a child out of sheer anger.
he chuckled, "well, you're free to come and go. i'm not forcing you to do anything... i certainly didn't force you to wear that dress either." his gaze on you was hot and it made you more flustered.
"i wanted something i could replace if you tore it." never forget when you had to replace your driving suit because someone got a good hold of it and ripped it at the seams around your pussy and ass.
call max impatient, it wasn't like your team couldn't afford it. if they couldn't he could always make room for you at red bull. he had to look after you.
"then i suggest you take it off before i start getting my hands on you." he spread his legs a little wider on the bed. the towel was on the floor to be hung up later, "last chance, my treasure. i want to hear you say it... you want me."
you reached behind you to get the zipper down. you'd rather die, but his heated gaze was enticing. you instead replied, "i want to ride you max, i want you under me as i fuck the daylights out of you. it is not a want, it is a need."
max barked out a laughter, "always so poetic." then licked his lips when you stepped out of the dress you wore. letting it grow wrinkled on the floor. it was followed by the expensive matching pair of bra and panties.
"did i buy that for you?" he asked curiously. he prone to sending you gifts in the off-season. while the rest of the drivers got joke gifts between each other. max always handed you something with a price tag that would make most gawk at.
you looked down at the matching set. you shrugged, "i honestly couldn't tell you. the brand it italian so, maybe it was a gift from charles." you made a face as you thought about it. it was all a lie, it was obviously from max.
the idea of charles even knowing your bra size felt weird, but with max it felt normal.
something crossed max's face as he leaned a little forward, his arms crossed along his toned chest, "funny. you're quite the comedian.' he raised his eyebrows at you, "so tell me, does leclerc fuck better than i do? is there other men i should know about? i heard you went on a boat trip with zak brown, is he getting action too? whore."
you made a face, "you're a possessive fuck, verstappen." you swallowed, "and if it strokes your ego, no. i'm not fucking anyone else because if i tried to fuck someone else i think you'd make their death look like an accident." you stepped forward, "if i told you that i was getting action from anyone, could be a random man. you'd kill them!"
max puffed out his chest for a moment in defiance, "really? what about that lovely girl, that reporter during our first year in formula one. you saw one picture and got the wrong idea. you left you crying. so don't act like i am so mean man." he uncrossed his arms as you got closer.
"she was going to use you, max. i knew it. you were so eager to be loved by someone, she would've taken advantage of you."
max sighed and braced his arms behind him. the two of you were naked and you were bickering. he said, "then name someone who won't take advantage of me."
you got onto the bed, your hand on his chest. you could feel the quickened pace of his heart. you said softly, lips close to his, "me." before you pulled him flat onto the bed and started to make out with him.
he loved the sound of that. when the kiss was broken, he watched you straddle his waist. if max verstappen was going to pick any lover, it was going to be the woman who drove him crazy on and off the track. someone he pushed him to be the best.
but in glimmers of tenderness, a soft underbelly. max knew that you loved him. and he loved you. it was just the words got all mixed up from the brain to the tongue.
i love you often became i'm going to beat you.
you sank onto his cock and hissed a little bit from the stretch. you held onto his shoulders for leverage while he guided you with his hands on your hips. your stomach flipped as you got fully seated on him.
"beautiful."
"shut up, max."
"never. not for you."
it was mushy, emotional in a way that made you core throb. a vulnerability that made you run hot. you rolled your hips against him, his cock nudged against the softest parts of you and it made your back arched.
max eventually got himself up against the headboard to feel closer to you. his hands left your hips and started to palm at your breasts. he soon leaned in for kissed along the soft skin. even his tongue dragged across your nipples, which only made the hairs on the back of your neck stand up.
"you always feel beautiful." he said, "no one else has been like you." he had changed so much since you met, ten years of this. the back and forth.
it made you chest clenched. you could only imagine what would happen if all this came out. but, in fairness you couldn't keep it behind the doors of hotel rooms forever. the minor controversies of the two of you in each other's grasp.
you hated to admit it. but you loved max verstappen. he was as much a part of you as you were of him. racing was in your blood, but the draw towards each other. a twin flame.
he'd almost run you off the track, you'd get into his face. he'd buy you dinner and you'd slink off to his room. away from prying eyes, the two of you would make love. or at the very least a primal kind of sex that left your head spinning.
it was a game, one to shield feelings. but as you moved your hips against him. it became more obvious that you were both under a delusion. you thought he didn't know that you loved him and he though you didn't know that he loved you.
but was obvious. as you moved and he touched you. you two knew each other too well. it was an obsession and you had long since pushed past the line of enemies.
enemies didn't look at each other like they wanted to devour one another. max verstappen didn't think of lewis hamilton or charles leclerc when he saw engagment rings in shop windows. you didn't think of george russell or oscar paistri when saw expensive wrist watches. you didn't have dreams in your early adult years of you dressed in wedding white and alex albon beaming at you, and max didn't jerk off to a vast collection of nude photos of lando norris. you two were in your own little orbit.
you panted heavily as you continued to move. the feeling were growing as you felt the throb in your chest. you ranked your fingers down his chest.
"max." you panted.
"yes."
you pulled him by his face up for another kiss as you continued to move against him. you moaned into the kiss, and he in turn whimpered against you. the feeling was prodding at just the right parts of his brain.
you were beautiful and it drove him wild.
"i'm glad no one else can have you." max said softly, tinged with tenderness, "they wouldn't know how to handle a woman like you."
you held his face for a moment and looked into his eyes, "oh yeah and you're an easy ride too." then pulled him in for another searing kiss.
he held onto your hips and guided you quickly against him. both of you working for a common goal (for one).
you braced your hands on his bare chest to give yourself support and continued your movements. a few more heavy thrusts of your hips before you leaned down and kissed him on the lips. your cunt tight around him as the wash of lust came over you. you came, then he came. and it both left you exhausted and breathless.
you yelped a little when max grabbed you by the middle and pulled you on the beside beside him. he peppered your face with kisses and you felt hot all over. your heart leapt at the feeling of him holding you. his softening cock up against you.
"you're beautiful."
"max." you said softly, the heat still in your cheeks.
he held you, your head against his chest. one of his hands was on the back of your head while the other was interlocking his fingers with yours. you were gravitated towards the sounds of his heartbeat.
you sighed, "i fear i have to admit something to you, verstappen."
he perked up a little, "oh?"
you sighed and raised your head. your hair was a mess and you looked tired from the long day on the track and the longer night together. you said, "this isn't me showing weakness. if you mistake what i am going to say as weakness, then you have another thing coming."
he looked at you with raised eyebrows and asked, "what is it?"
you rubbed his broad chest and said in quiet voice, "max. i'm in love with you. and i have been for some time." you swallowed, diverting your eyes from him, "i think we suck as rivals. i think we need to become lovers, for real. even if we don't tell the press and give them that satisfaction. to be able to call you mine is all i would want."
he took you by the chin and pressed a kiss against your lips. your heart jumped and when he pulled away, he said quietly in return as if it were a secret, "i'd want nothing more. i think we're about to save the whole grid anymore headaches."
-
driving felt like a lifetime ago, as did the rivalry you and max shared. the day after max retired, he posted two pictures online. the first one had basically been scrubbed from the internet, except on max's phone. it was you two in your first year of formula one. your legs draped over his lap while he took a selfie of you two kissing. the second was a similar pose, years later. when the charade was over and you two finally admitted your feelings to one another.
in the caption he made a cheeky comment about how the two of you probably weren't as careful as you thought. but, that was being young and dumb. when you retired two years later, with two championships under your belt. you posted a photo of the small wedding you had a year prior.
your caption read, "call me mrs. verstappen and we're going to have a problem." you had simply hyphened your last names. which was then passed onto your son that you had a year after your retirement.
"niko." max was as he tried to wrangle his son, he eventually hoisted the little boy up, "you have to put on a life jacket, remember?" he smiled at his son, "you have to listen to mama, nicholas." he reminded his son.
the little boy nodded rapidly as max carried him onto the boat. you had lunch packed in a bag while max carried the rest of the stuff needed as well. the three of you were going for a little boat ride for the afternoon.
max made sure that his son was secure in a life jacket while you put the bag you were carrying down. you took a seat and picked up your son. you felt max's eyes lingering on you.
"what?" you asked half-jokingly.
max smiled, "i love you." he seemed lighter now, he had all the trophies he could ever need.
"i love you too." you responded, a phrase you had said a thousand times at least. to think that there was a period of time that the idea of loving him would've made you pull your hair out. you then kissed youe son on the cheek, "but i love you more, nico."
the little boy laughed and max winked at you before he went to get the boat started. while you busied yourself getting sunscreen on your son, you held your smile.
the media circus around you two eventually died now. there was no draw to mystery of your relationship, it also didn't help that the two of you kept nicholas out of the public eye. it left you both retired with your son. you'd sometimes think about how you were all those years earlier, when max was still your 'rival'. but, in all fairness, even if you two did stand toe-to-toe with one another and pushed one another into racing greatness. he was a better husband and father than he ever was a rival.
the sun, the moon and their little star.
#bunny writes#max verstappen x you#max verstappen x reader#max verstappen smut#max verstappen#max smut#mv1#mv33 x reader#mv33 fic#mv33#mv1 smut#mv1 x reader#mv1 fic#mv33 smut#mv33 imagine#f1 rivals au#rivals au#reader insert#formula one fanfiction#formula 1 fic#formula one imagine#formula 1 rpf#formula 1#formula one#formula 1 fanfic#thank you for coming to the show!
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manmade monsters Sun/Moon au. bc i have no self control lol
i also mentally call it the 'why are there giant robot monsters in my shed' au lol
idk what else to say so uh. enjoy
#manmade monsters au#horror movie monsters au#fnaf au#bones of a rabbit#bones of a rabbit au#fnaf sun/moon x reader#fnaf sun/moon x y/n#fnaf dca#fnaf sun x reader#fnaf sun x y/n#grouchy reader i love u#also they r mentally ill thats part of why they don't trust authority#they know that no matter what their problem is the cops would write it off bc theyre 'crazy'#and that peeves them off#is this based off my experience with doctors saying every symptom ive ever had is bc of anxiety. perhaps#anyway im not dead! huzzah#srry lol
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this week in Things I Will Never Recover From, THIS
if u listen closely u can hear me sobbing as i reread this five times over, take a water break, then return to reread it a dozen more times
i LOVE this, i can FEEL the places and the atmosphere, and the way you write the CHARACTERS AND THEIR THOUGHTS AND FEELINGS?? chef’s kiss, 134237846/10, would eat for the rest of my life. i love u op. i love u
A late Valentine's Day gift for @bones-of-a-rabbit, I hope you and anyone else who reads enjoy!
The Sea-star and the Eclipse
The waves pushed against the wooden vessel sailing through them with a playful vigor, emerald waters choosing to be pacified this morning with their lulled sway, the breeze lax as it barely pushed against cared for sails, -one could blow against them and it would have the same effect. The wind carried the calls of ocean borne creatures, the morning gossip of nereid nymphs and the lull of a siren's call if one truly focused, the sun began its slow climb into the sky while letting those under its rays feel the warmth sought after as the seasons changed over seas. The sea itself held an enchanting shine this day, her usually murky waters held an appealing blue undertone to compliment the emerald shine she chose to wear today, a shade able to rival the richest of dyes, the skies holding a few clouds golden with the residue shades of sunrise and a calming tone blossoming from a fading magenta. A jovial tune joined the drifting gossip in the breeze as it rumbled out of your chest, attention occupied elsewhere while you searched through the horizon using your trusted spyglass; a beautifully crafted object made of cared for wood, combined with selectively chosen sea glass, and branded with a family crest that now only belongs to the lone sailor. It took the instinctive steadying of your body and a learned patience with the waves, but eventually after some moments had floated past like jellyfish caught in a riptide you could make out your targeted location in the near distance, a smile of anticipation emerging from the sight. Putting the tool away in the side of your belt you left the forecastle deck to change tack quickly lest you dared to miss the few and far in between gusts of crisp ocean air able to actually help move you to your destination. The captain’s ship wasn’t as small and nimble as most merchant boats come by, yet it wasn’t as large and regal as the militia or even pirate ships, your home upon the water was a perfect compromise of all the other vessels tied up nicely into one design. It was the most desirable for a sailor who wanted to hold more wares in the hold than other merchants, yet still keep it small enough that it was manageable with your lone person, all while holding onto some of the mobility others could only dream of. Of course that didn’t mean living on your lonesome upon this ship was anywhere close to being able to be described as easy work, often you would have to stay up and spend several sleepless nights battling with Poseidon, but it was what you preferred. Even though you could, you never would be able to settle down for an easy life, where was the fun in going through day by day if not with a challenge, albeit a challenge of routine? Admittedly, it was this very mindset that led you to more of the questionable adventures, like swimming in the ocean’s harsh waters for artifacts she tried to hide from your curious reach, or sometimes taking the paths no right minded captain would take without a death wish. If it wasn’t blatantly obvious by the occasional scar that decorated your skin, death was a mistress you often danced with for simply the thrill of the tale, and you've yet to stumble in your waltz together. While steering the rudder you held a concentrated gaze in your illuminated eyes, the sunlight reflecting the water's shine within your focused hues, giving a passionate effect to the emotions you refused to hide from the world, as you directed your ship towards the craggy cliffs, confident in your ability to traverse the waves.
Despite the misleading friendly name the cliffs had, no sailor wanted to sail through the anxiously narrow gap between them unless desperate, for it was rumored few if any passed through the cliffs alive, often by a trip only to be finished by a crew member having to man the decks alone without captain. Anyone who has listened to the drunken sailors at inns knew of the creature that populated the sharp rocks, living in underwater caves by the pass, killing off most of those who did manage to make it through unless they gave an offering to appease it. The matter at hand simply came down to whether those listening would believe the tales or not, and the fact they were brave, -or stupid, enough to physically sail through despite the warnings. You personally had come across creatures of myths while living on these waters before and lived to tell the tale, so rumors of a rampaging monster within the waters of the cliffs carried in the distant wind, you couldn't refuse the opportunity to find fact from fiction. It was your first passing through when you met him, and it was a memory you'll always look back on with a laugh, even if you couldn’t share the situation with any drinking buddies.
You could feel the adrenaline flooding into your fingertips as you grew closer to the craggy cliffs, knuckles going white with how tightly you held the wooden wheel, it was time to test if rumors were really just mere rumors, and hopefully make it out alive to tell the tale. The dark clouds over head were overlooked by your anticipating eyes, and you seemed to disregard the fact that the scent of geosmin had become stronger than a mere handful of moments ago.
As if mirroring the memory, the captain pushed themselves into motion, watching the currents keen eye as you shifted to try and pull your boat away from the jagged rocks that upturned like claws trying to carve into the wooden walls, an attempt to reopen healed scars. They were black and the water made them look oily, even in the beautiful light of such a nice day often forcing the you to run from the locked rudder wheel, -done by wedging it with an angled stick, to the ropes of the masts. It looked like such a tiring workout, but by simply observing your movements one could see the practice etched into every step, be it from how steady you pulled the ropes into place to how swift each footfall was, holding swift purpose in every action. You kept running through your routing to steer yourself into the near needle like opening leading to the cave that only those willing to face the rumored sea monster, a place nearly having gone undiscovered if not for by mere chance.
You grit your teeth while trying to make sense of anything through the pouring rain, raindrops falling so harshly it might as well had been hail striking your body to create such similar stinging impact, you've nearly lost your footing several times already. Nearly stumbling you heard wood creak and reminded of the fact you were far from happy with how close your dear ship has gotten to being pierced with those gnarly claws. It wasn't supposed to be such a cut throat tango with the mistress, but to stumble like this when you had such reputations to uphold was fiercely irritating, with only you to blame. The signs of the changing weather had all been there, you were just too caught up in the possibilities, making the storm feel as if had been sudden. Nearly out of anguish you sputtered liters off your lips and shook your head like a wet dog trying to get rid of the never-ending mask of rain and seawater, but it was during the shaking did your eye catch something. Was…was that a tail? It was a striking color, shaped like no fishtail you've ever seen, and it looked to have headed port, -directly into the cliffs, which was only more odd due to the fact proceeding starboard was the way to leave, wait, no that wasn't as perplexing as you originally thought. Taking a hand to wipe a new layer of water off of your face, water sticking to your eyelashes like dewdrops on spider webs, you directed the focus you could spare after the creature and where it vanished, searching with newfound urgency, only to be rewarded with the sight of a small opening leading into what looked to be a cave large enough to give you shelter for the night. It was risky, and whatever you saw possibly ambush you and your ship, but it wasn't as if you had many options, each other possibility washed away with every falling raindrop slapping your skin, the wind biting into your matted clothing and hair; you were going to be lucky if you didn't end up getting sick after this. Steeling your disposition you quickly changed tack to steer into the suffocating tight space, feeling as if you were drowning as the rain continued its torrent cascading, while being shoved with a bullying force by the stressed waves. Despite it all though, with the objective in mind, it was you who intertwined their fingers with a confident grip, taking lead of the dance with lady death, refusing to go down without a fight.
The sailor slowly steered the ship portside, that jovial tune leaving your lips again with the near careless smile keeping the corners of your mouth upturned, a wordless noise encouraging itself the more it progressed, the few avians using the crevices in the rocks as nests seemed to even join in. It felt as if you've cut through the tight gap a hundred times, feeling none of the first time stress as the rocking waves passively pushed the vessel into the mouth of the somewhat hidden cave, the gold wrung out of they sky by now with the happy cobalt blue having taken over. Soon the bright sunlight was muted into dimmer tones, -which by all means was still fairly bright, by the stone ceiling engulfing your ship like a greedy frogfish, and the captain could hear another join the tune, a voice much more gifted when it came to songs in your opinion. Your smile could only brighten as you carefully lowered the anchor and raised the sails to tie them off, listening as another body moved through the echoing water, every sound reverberating throughout the rocky walls. Once you were sure all was set so your home didn't try to get close and personal to the dark minerals surrounding you, you leaned over the railing to look at the just as if not more than happy ocean borne waiting for you to notice he was present. Said companion once realizing you were indeed focusing on him,- a realization you could visibly watch as the smile filled with nothing but friendly pointed teeth broadened, opened his arms with expectancy, wanting you to jump into his arms so he could carry you down as you've done several times beforehand. The admittedly very appealing option could only make you laugh softly in appreciation even as you shake your head in refusal, disappearing to gather a rope ladder with delight when your large friend is in such a good mood. The thought was tugging at the back of your mind that it was nearly hilarious how today of all days would be so much of quite literally smooth sailing as it has been, even taking the time to excitedly recall your plan while you disappeared into your quarters to gather a large basket set aside in preparation of the hours to come. Taking but a momentary pause to make sure something specific was tucked safely within it, an object with enough weight you had to use genuine effort to move it, -a stark difference to its typically smaller near weightless counterparts, and enough meaning that could have easily doubled the energy spent carrying it alone. You made sure to keep a quick pace, not wanting to let your long tailed companion be forced to wait more than necessary, and the pleased trill that greeted your descending figure was enough reassurance to tide over your clouded mind for the day in comforting waves, as if the threat of fog had been blown away all at once. Steadily you scaled down the ladder until your feet were firm against the flooring, keeping you waist deep in the cool ocean water, occasional fits of warmer temperatures flowing in until shoved away lazily, the basket now being held above your head and pointedly away from the other. The aquatic creature moved to happily follow the land borne, curiously trying to reach for the basket and see what was packed only to be swatted away playfully, followed by a tutting click of your tongue, laughter upon your lips.
"Ah ah ah! Patience, you'll see what's in there soon Eclipse, but first, I have to ask, have you ever heard of valentine's day?"
A thoughtful expression passed across his features as he thought about the question, but it was obvious his mind was filled with sluggish minnows this morning, until eventually a defeated huff escaped him before he went with plan b, mischief in his scales. You knew it was coming, but still you couldn't hold in your amused chuckles as large webbed hands wrapped themselves around your being, easily lifting you up out of the water to be set tenderly on the rocky shore, -an area out of reach of the sea that was more of a mini island than shore, soon a large frilled head pressing into your side with a pair of dilated pupils; you still don't know how he learned to do such powerful puppy dog eyes. You shook your head as you gave one of his hands a pat, silently asking to be let go as you lowered the basket down beside your lap before you gently pet the sides of his head, pretending to look stern even if you both knew you were a sucker for the basilisk's ways. His continued to poke and tug on you like a curious child, tilting his head in your hold every now and then as he humored you, trying to keep your attention on him so you would give in when he obviously had no answer, that or he just wanted you to tell him so he can see the inside of the basked sooner. You were usually a lot more stubborn with these situations, but you decided that the suspense was truly killing him, -especially as the dramatic guppy made it very clear that was in fact what was happening, and chose to show him mercy, although it was sooner than you figured he could have lasted, only early noon. You could hear his tail splashing the water in despite his mocking show of withering away, all it took was a couple pats calling for attention before he revived himself, eager to hear what you were about to say.
"Well, Valentine's day is a day where we celebrate our loved ones. Couples, friends, and oftentimes family members will trade each other gifts to show their love and spend time together, a day of letting each other know they care. Many even use it as the day to confess romantic feelings. I can't say I know how it all started, but I can say I know its a lovely day to have a celebration, and I couldn't think of any better way other than to spend it with my favorite mate."
You couldn't help but watch fondly as he visibly registered the words, watching you speak like a child happy to learn, hanging onto every syllable with the same merit of climbing a cliff, and it was endearing to know just how important you seemed to be to him in order to stir this reaction from him. The fondness turned into giddy amusement as you watched his bewitching eyes widen when he realized the telling of your plan, specifically the fact you were going to give him a gift; you figured you’d give it after you both ate the arrangement of dishes you cooked the night prior, that way you both would be full enough to laze about comfortably The cry of a passing bird cut through without much disregard, evicting a chorus of responses, the comforting smell of the sea floating aimlessly in the cave not being overwritten by the aromas of the food in the basket, even coercing some curious feather bodies to see if there was slivers they could steal. It was relaxing, and staying with your favorite buddy you couldn’t feel any more at peace, because as much as you wouldn’t admit how you oftentimes felt on the ship one your own, -you were alone not lonely, there was something so charming to have such an intelligent being want to spend time with you as much as you did, curious of each other’s worlds. The lull of the waves bumping into the rocks around the two of you held a specific pattern, a reassuring sound telling of the power they had, even as you could distinct the noise of the strong tail hitting them, splashing with a happy sashay that reminded you of a dog off on mainland, and you distinctly had the urge to pet him just as much. Instantly you did what you could to sear these waking moments into your memory, it all was so vibrant even in the shade of the rocky shelter holding it all in its cupped palms, you couldn’t imagine forgetting how every breath shared between the two of you was filled with such content, it may as well come out of a myth. But, in a sense, that’s what he was supposed to be, wasn’t it? Chuckling you nodded in excited reply to his metal observation before turning away to begin setting the day’s activities out around you, pulling out the several containers of dishes, -most of the contents was food to appease your basilisk friend’s appetite, until you got to a collection of books. Once the leather bound bundle of stories were stacked behind you you grabbed the final thing inside, only you may have made a slight show of quickly hiding it out of sight nestled in your lap once you realized how he was intently watching everything pulled out, and the confused ‘mrr’ that sounded out as his head nudged your legs with gentle hands attempting to discover what you had hid made it worth it. You both were obviously encouraging each other with playful prodding, -something that could only make you appreciate the friendship you have somehow more than you already do, before you finally gave him a shove laughing, hiding the object under your jacket as you somehow had ended up onto your back in the small battle.
“No, that's your valentine’s gift! Now listen here you overgrown noodle, I figured we can eat the food I slaved over in the kitchen to make, then I'll give it to you, alright? Now come on, the sooner we get started, the more daylight we have to finish off that one book and start a new one."
After you situated yourself back into an upright position you wasted no time in uncovering the plates of food, the warmth they gave off instantly getting sucked away into the breeze, curious birds very noticeably edging themselves over in a horrid attempt to be sneaky with the presence of such a dangerous predator. The smile on your face began to slip though as you realized Eclipse seemed to go still, you couldn't even hear the splashing of his tail, so you looked up with slight concern, wondering what was swimming around in his head. What you saw didn't exactly reassure you either, there was a shadowy glint in his eyes, one you knew almost too well, and you tilted your head to try and get his optics to focus back onto you. His eyes were one of the many characteristics you loved about him, the optics that had undoubtedly taken the lives of so many before you, but you could never bring yourself to fear those enchanting colors, the way the specks of violet bled into the near golden orange like spilled paint. They just drew you in like the light bouncing within carved gemstones, and you were alright with that. What you weren't alright with was how his thoughts looked to have bit into his tail like a parasite, the vice grip in their jaws must have been uncomfortable as he began slowly sinking into the water, an action that stirred you into getting up to approach him slowly, hands outreached for his own. Shadows of dark whispers had begun swirling in your own mind nipping at your thoughts and despite how the day had been going you couldn't help but wonder if his sudden change in demeanor was due to something you've done, did you offend him? Were you too forward in assuming he would want to spend the entire day with you? Did you use the wrong words to describe your intentions again?
"Hey big guy, penny for your-"
Your words were cut off as his gaze locked into your own, nearly knocking you breathless as it felt as if he only just then remembered you were there, and then suddenly swam away like you had hollered at him. It felt like one of those shadows gave up for nibbles and instead took a bite of you to swam off with him, your hands still left in the air as you were frozen, watching his figure disappear into the fingers of outreached minerals, only able to register, yes, he did in fact just leave you to your own devices, as the only remnants of his presence were the disturbances in the water he so swiftly glided through. You had half a mind to chase after him be it by swimming or by rowing in the yawl, but even at your best you were a beached flounder compared to the ribbon eel in his natural element, your hands lowering in defeat as it dawned you all you could do now was to hope he returned. You were sure he had his reason for leaving you, surely he would be back, but even if you came up with enough reasons to overflood the seven seas it didn't make it hurt any less, you could only angrily shoo the birds stealing scraps of the food to vent out your confused anger. Not at him, but to you. You went ahead and planned ahead that the two of you would stay together well after the moon hung over your heads so even the stars hear your tales and wordless songs that could hold more meaning words would have ever given them, you planned this without him. You should have asked, you shouldn't have just jumped ship assuming he would be fine with it, sure the day was perfect for you, but was it for him? You should have run it by him beforehand to make sure he could tell you in the off chance that he was uncomfortable with the fact, instead you just sprung this upon him blinded with the image of smiles unable to leave your faces. Your thoughts turned against you, murmurs of berating words leaving your lips as you audibly cursed your stupidity until you decided that pacing around putting the sailors at the bars at mainland to shame would do you no good, especially if Eclipse decided to return. Your efforts of sailing here and preparing for this day have already been spent with the intent to stay over night and by Poseidon's trident, you were going to enjoy your planned stay with or without your anticipated guest. The overwhelming swarm of shadows couldn't keep up with you long enough to begin infiltrating your school of thoughts, you wouldn't let them as you busied yourself with the distraction of tasks that had to be done, probably looking like a curious reef fish exploring new spouts of coral. A blanket was cast across the rock floor, -out of reach of any rising tides, with a small tent made out of other blankets and a few pillows to cover you and the food; you had begun to grow tired with shooing away those thieving birds, you hadn't rung them a dinner bell and so help their bloodline if you barely miss getting poo'd on again they were going to be tomorrow's dinner. When you had done all that you could find needing to be done you decided that it wouldn't hurt for you to revisit one of your favorite list of fables with the dishes you never got to eat, even if you never touched the ones set to the side for a certain basilisk as they were drizzled with doubt, would he return to eat his serving?
The sunlight once seeping into the cave in powerful beams had crawled more into the waters than against the walls, the sun itself having slipped lower into the horizon as your fingers combed through the cared for pages and traced the leather cover, hues focused on each words that painted a lovely story in your mind's eyes, -a story needn't be grand and outlandish to be considered good in your opinion, when a bit of light was reflected into your gaze. Pausing you set the book to the side, your attention now on the object partially covered by the jacket you had shed in the spur of your work as your hands moved closer to retrieve the object, the black glossy surface triggering your very instinctive 'oo, shiny' reaction to the light making it sparkle, -the realization elicited a small amused smile on your lips. The surface was cool to the touch, but it wasn't biting, and despite it being larger than others, it felt comfortable to hold in your palms with a good weight. You turned it around in your hold absentmindedly, a finger tracing the the flaws caused by age forced into the strange surface that shone like metal, before moving onto the runes etched into it, markings that you knew you couldn't even attempt to comprehend. It was a language that, like the artifact itself, was from an era lost to legend. Your placated mind began to stir with mixed emotions, your hope had begun dwindling as the shadows made from escaping sunlight grew larger, and you even wondered if he would like such a gift, let alone know why you thought it had such importance. A small spiteful part of you was tempted to simply toss it into the waves and let him find it on his own, -their slow pace had lost the calming appeal to now seem just downright antagonistic, but you instead tucked it back under your jacket in favor of the plate holding biscuits before returning to bury yourself back into familiar arms of the old superstitious myths you believe wholeheartedly. You let time flow past while you read, the sun feeling to move like a drifting jellyfish with reckless abandon, the tides had slowly begun to rise while reaching for the moon, - not quite high tide yet, as the waves gained more momentum in their lazy dance. You had since lit a lantern to brighten the pages of your second book, the first having been finished long enough for a chunk of this one to have been read, when the sounds of water stirring forcefully met your ears, causing you to immediately perk up. With scales vibrant enough that even in the darkening waters you could see every perfect imperfection, a crown of frills and horns making his head look like a sun, and a tail long enough it could wrap around the width of your ship twice, you watched as the creature you were far from certain would even return cut through the water effortlessly in order to approach the shore you were nestled on top of. As he rose from the water you sprung to your feet, ready to get answers and apologize in the chance you truly had done something wrong, giving him no chance to swim off again before at least hearing you out with every step you took.
"Eclipse! I'm sorry, I'm so sorry if I had upset you, why'd you swim off like that? I was scared you weren't coming back."
You didn't really expect much, so when he quite animatedly hid something behind his back with two of his arms sporting a bright grin of someone who had a secret to share, it probably was one of the least scenarios you could have seen coming once he returned. Seeing your confusion a low chuckle rumbled from his chest as his other set of hands began to make gestures, specific motions slow enough that you could pick up, and once you did the emotion you could recognize most among your internal near-overfilling pot was pride. Had he been practicing? After a few moments of processing you suddenly felt bashful for how quickly you had assumed the negative side of things, running a hand through your hair with a sigh before making eye contact with those gems you treasured more than any rock you could find in the sea.
'Needed gift for mate.'
"But you didn't, I wasn't expecting, actually, you know what? I can't wait. Here's an idea, knowing how excited we both are to see, why don't we exchange our gifts now and eat later, don't move alright?"
You chuckled at the reluctant yet happy nod you received, knowing he probably wanted to go first but the anticipation of his own was more than enough to sweeten the deal for him to go along with your small demand. You pointedly decided to ignore how despite the chill becoming noticeable in the breeze without the light of the sun to warm its touch you could feel how your cheeks grew warm or the fact that with just the simple action you couldn't keep the smile off your face. You kept the jacket draped over his gift to keep it hidden until the last moment, and while you turned to approach them again, you hesitated as the air left your lungs. He was watching your every move intently, the gleam in his eyes made his powerful gaze have a lovestruck appearance, it was such an unbashful raw emotion put on display for your eyes and your eyes only to see it made your heart flutter in an unmistakable way. Filling your lungs with air again you gave him a genuine smile and pushed yourself forward, unable to hide the fact that the mere presence of the ocean borne could dispel any worry clouding your being, a ray of sunlight that scared off the unwanted shadows and the glow of the moon that gave comfort to the lost sailors. As you got close enough he extended a hand after noticing how it took both of yours to hold whatever was under the jacket, and once in his palm you pulled the clothing off like a magician. hilariously enough his palm had dwarfed the object to look like the usual versions of it, but after a curious coo you weren't sure he realized escaped him you immediately began to give him some context, missing the vague flash of recognition in his eyes.
"Remember that one tale, the sailor and the moon? Well you know how the moon gave him that device to guide him to the love of his life, right? As I was sailing one day I was swept into uncharted waters that took me to a lagoon, and things started to feel familiar like I had seen them before, or at least heard of it. Well I fished around in this waterlogged head of mine and by the time I could see the pieces of sunken timber I realized I knew where I was not in the sense I had been there before, but instead because I had read about it. I did some swimming, -don't give me that look I made sure it was safe first, and came across the compass seemingly from myth."
While you spoke it was if the world silenced itself so nothing would interrupt you as you changed your focus from his face to the artifact in question, excitedly opening it and pointing out everything you've discovered about it after countless hours spent examining it since you pulled it from the wreckage, from the strange runes to the small things that was just as described in the tale. Of course you were fully aware of the possibility it was just random compass, after all it wasn't uncommon for replicas to be made from the old sea tale, -a tribute of admiration and oftentimes luck, but the sheer amount of coincidences in simply finding it alone was enough to make even the most pessimistic old sea dog to believe. As you talked, there was that heartwarming expression again, the one that made you feel like you were the brightest star in his night sky, the basilisk eagerly nodding along with your words in matching fascination, all as you were once again teaching him a new world with your mere fingertips. He looked on in what you dared to recognize as loving, your eventually realized your own expression must have been just as admiring as his own because when he realized you were finished talking after waiting for you to add something only to catch your gaze it looked like he was nearly overwhelmed with emotions. You could feel your breath catch in your throat as he leaned over with lidded eyes to press your foreheads together in what felt like a tender gesture of affection, and your heart tripped over itself as you could only press against him in similar fashion, only giving a slight nuzzle before taking a step back. In the excitement you nearly forgot this was a trade, -you weren't the only one, and it seemed that with a quick assessment between the two of you, it was only you that truly had the bashful awareness, his own adorable blush visible but he was so unwavering it looked like he knew exactly what he was doing, and you attempted to play it off by leaning over his shoulder in a half attempt of peeking at his clutched hands. Quickly he moved the other way and pulled it even further out of sight, the light of the lantern growing brighter than the natural source of light besides his ethereal hues, and even though you had spent most of the day in a fret on your own, it was moments like these that made up for it. You couldn't hold in your laughter as he mocked you earlier in the day, clicking his tongue in a 'tsking' manner before shifting the mysterious object into one palm and getting closer to you, the waves voicing their disturbance while forcefully folded into themselves as he leaned to grab a wrist with two hands, -guiding them into a bowl with his own moving to cup yours, and another covering your eyes. His hands were warm as they nearly engulfed your own, a strange softness to them as he gently held onto you even after something smooth and round was set into your awaiting palms just as the anticipation had begun poking too harshly into your patience reserves. You could hear his smooth breathing as your fingers grasped onto the object, every shift both felt and heard, and just as you were about to voice an impatient question he lifted the hand restricting your sight, killing the words on your tongue to replace them with a gasp of awe. In your palms was perhaps the biggest pearl you had ever seen, it was the size of a large orange with the weight to match, with colors you've never imagined to see on such a gem. The usual milky surface was instead composed of the abyss the deep dark parts of the twilight waters were made of, but while the last bits of the sunlight were sucked into the orb you could see the iridescent shine of violet and yellow tones, as is the sunset itself had dusted its colors into the flawless sphere. Your eyes began to sting with your very own saltwater at the beautiful gift as you moved, -the pearl clutched to your bosom with both palms cupped around it like it was but a delicate egg, looking at your observer with a smile so bright your cheeks hurt before kissing his cheek.
The blush that accompanied the dopey smile made up of friendly sharp teeth assured you the taste of seawater on your lips was worth the while as you admired your basilisk valentine. Carefully balancing your new prized possession in one palm you used the other to grab one of his hands to take him to your tent, big enough to be Eclipse proof, only to let go as you situated yourself in your resting area close to the dark waters. He followed immediately after, arms hugging your legs with his head resting upon your lap, the lantern's flame proudly being the both of your only light source as it illuminated both of your enchanted expressions, you had fallen under one another's spell and even though it wasn't easy neither would dare to complain. The moon had taken over by now, the stars speckled into the night sky were reflected so brightly you could see them shimmered in the restless waves, even as the near completely blackened emerald color was engulfing any chance to seeing whatever may lurk within. With Eclipse at your side, -or on top of you in the specifics, you couldn't really have a fear of the sea and her dangerous spawn, not when you were able to look at possibly one of her most life threatening children with such love and be have it be returned. The rest of that night you spent in each others presence lying by or on top of each other sharing food, reading stories, even coming up with new songs for the breeze to hear, until eventually you had fallen asleep to dream of the memories you've made today; shortly he joined you in sleep's embrace after watching your peaceful figure longingly with nothing but admiration. Land and ocean borne slept together that night, both unaware of the opened compass whose arrow spun until pointing at both of them, knowing their destination has been completed; connecting them with a love that the tides and the moon couldn't rival, a love to be as eternal as the sea.
#writing to adore#wonderful works#fanfics of the fic#bones of a rabbit au#basilisk eclipse#beastie au#kinok0s-writings#catch me making sea levels rise w my tears over how sweet and tender these two dummies are#god this is so good im gonna b thinkin abt it for days#fanart#soft and sweet#your honor i love them#the seastar and the eclipse
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One of the reasons why I was and still am obsessed with Creep Reader and Rascal's dynamic is because they provide what the other needs most. Creep just wants someone who understands them while Rascal longs for someone who isn't afraid of them. I'll write a fic someday about how the two first met, but Creep seeing Rascal and their first thought being "Whoa, that's a big bunny." was probably the best thing their mind could've come up with at the time.
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"wHy...."
Trimming the creature's matted fur, you don't even bother to glance up as you reply. "Why what?"
"You've tended to my wounds... Bathe me. Fed me. Most of your kind wouldn't give me the luxury of spitting on me if I were to be set ablaze... Why...."
Its query puzzles you. Does it want you to be scared? It seemed pretty happy when you offered to let it crashed at your place albeit a bit confused itself. The answer is clear as rain.
"....Why would I be scared of a giant rabbit?-.. Other hand."
The monster obediently places its opposite paw in your smaller palm. Had it been any other human they may have laughed at the obsidity of it all. You really intend to keep this thing as your pet? It could pick its teeth clean with your bones by nightfall yet the very idea of doing so feels almost blasphemous.
"Nothing else to say?"
"Rabbits do not. Speak...."
#Creep Reader#Rascal my oc#yandere#yandere imagines#yandere x you#yandere headcanons#yandere scenarios#yandere x reader#yandere insert#yandere blurb#yandere oc#yandere teratophilia
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A GENTLE HAND ★ AEMOND TARGARYEN
SUMMARY | "Gentle Hand," Mylenda insists on calling you, and perhaps that is what you are destined to be, perhaps that is what Prince Aemond needs.
PAIRING | Aemond Targaryen x Maid!Reader
TAGS | Mention of sexual assault and abuse, mommy issues, angst and light fluff.
WORDCOUNT | 10k
NOTE | This is my first fanfiction on this website. Ewan Mitchell plays such a fascinating Aemond that I had to write this. I hope it's any good. Tell me if I should write a part 2! <333
likes, comments, reblogs are much appreciated!
The roebuck’s blood turned your fingers sticky and the knife handle slippery.
Brought by the royal hunters that very morning, the poor creature now lay on the counter of the Red Keep’s kitchens between the dismembered rabbits and the plucked ducks. It had only taken you a few cuts to skin the beast⏤practice makes perfect.
The flesh was now raw and spilling its bloody perfume. You grabbed a thyme leaf from one of the bouquets garnis picked for the mutton stew and pressed it against your nose to soothe your nostrils, assailed by the disturbing scent of game⏤a full-bodied mixture of earth and wildness. Above this acrid aroma, death distilled its powerful bouquet and turned your stomach. It had been years since you entered the service of the Crown and yet the disgust never vanished.
"She's coming," a small voice yelped from the kitchen entrance.
A murmur passed through the crowd of maids. All around you, they hurried their movements. Two tables away, Cass grimaced and hurriedly threw the pieces of mutton into a large pot before drowning them in wine. You met Dacey's panicked gaze as she hastened to peel potatoes. The blade of the knife slipped and nicked at her palm, but she had no time to care or feel.
Nothing mattered when Mylenda was around.
You straightened up and slipped the thyme leaf into your apron pocket. Your knife took no time to sever the roebuck’s tendons, spread the muscles, scrape the bones and, finally, dislocate the shoulder with a clean cut. The second limb followed immediately afterwards.
Heavy footsteps echoed through the kitchen and rattled the pans. The strong, greasy smell of venison, which had been bothering you all morning, disappeared at this familiar noise. Your fingers tightened around the handle of your knife as you stuck it in a leg.
One piece of meat wasted and your head would be chopped off.
"Is that venison ready, girl?" the matron’s voice grated against your eardrum. "It shouldn’t take you hours to cut up a poor carcass. I taught you better. Has my absence made you lazy? You know what happens to slackers."
You shook your head.
"Sorry, ma’am."
She grabbed your hand. The knife fell with a sharp clang, silencing all movement in the vicinity. Pots and pans, chopping boards and spits were cast aside. Amidst this deathly silence, all eyes fell on you.
"These are no hard-working hands. No, they're not… Next time I see you, I'd better see blisters on your lazy palm. Such… Such gentle hands in my kitchen," she scoffed, "Even whores get rougher skin jerking off cocks."
You flinched.
"You better start working harder, got it?"
Terror ran through you. You nodded frantically before wrenching your hand from her grasp and cradling your clenched fist against your heart.
Mylenda muttered something you did not care to hear, your ears deaf to anything but the frantic pounding of your heart against your temples. You looked down and immediately came across the beast's eyes, sitting in a clay bowl and reminiscent of the pile of gooseberries that would be used as a sauce for the chops. You could almost taste the delicious berries on the tip of your tongue.
Your stomach rumbled.
If the old woman heard it, she said nothing, too busy assessing your work.
"The cut could be cleaner," she criticised, "but I don't suppose the royals will mind when the meat crumbles into the stew. You're lucky we're not roasting it. You’re as tactful as a headsman, girl. You’re not cutting off a thief’s neck but the King's dinner. You better fix that."
"Yes, ma’am."
Your gaze fell even lower, to the hide piled up in a jumble on the floor. You were hoping to make a coat out of it this evening, in the privacy of your little bedroom. The air was getting colder and colder and your cotton dress would soon no longer suffice. Gilliane, like a true Northerner, kept saying that winter was coming.
Whatever that meant.
You kicked the skin under the table and prayed to the Seven Gods that Mylenda would not see it.
"Once you've finished cutting it up, you’ll make a terrine from the legs and shoulders," she ordered. "The Hand loves it. And don't forget to cook the guts. I ain’t letting a plump liver like that go to waste. Must’ve been a brave beast, that one," the matron said as she struck the bloody organ with pride. "A persillade should do. The mutton stew will be the main course."
You nodded and swallowed down your bile. The rancid scent of the old woman rivaled with the earthy exhalations of the venison.
"Back to work, girl."
With these words, Mylenda left to go and torment Cass, who was struggling to cook the mutton. Bubbling wine stained the sides of the copper pot and evaporated on the flame.
"Gi' me that. I'll carve it up for ya."
Someone snatched the knife out of your hand. You lifted your head and found Gilliane beside you, her gaze riveted on the matron who had turned crimson from screaming at poor Cass.
"Gentle hands... Gentle hands... I’ll tell her what I think of her hands. I'd love to see them so-called palms wrinkled wi' effort. I've never seen her hold no knife since I arrived," she mumbled.
Her defence warmed your heart.
"Tek care o' them offal ‘fore the old cow decides to serve yer kidneys wi' mustard instead," she whispered. "She'd get a kick outta that, that madwoman."
"Do you think she can smile?" you asked.
"Gods, no," she scoffed. "She was born wi' pursed lips and that ugly wrinkle between her eyebrows."
You both laugh before returning to your tasks. Gilliane was busy carving up the rest of the venison so you concentrated on the liver and the parsley. The smell of garlic and herbs wafted out of the mortar in front of you and made your mouth water as you added a pinch of salt and a spoonful of oil.
For a second, you dreamt of being a lady and imagined tasting these exquisitely flavoured dishes. The soup⏤more water than broth⏤and the stale bread you were entitled to once the service was over were intended to feed you, not to please. This right was reserved for people of good breeding.
In the corner of your eye, you saw Mylenda stopped to face Hendry, a little boy of just thirteen who had joined you a month earlier. It wasn't unusual for people to sell their children in exchange for a new cart or some meat. Sometimes, mothers would lay their babies outside the gates of the Keep and pray that the place would blossom into a better life. From here, you could see the boy's pale complexion and shaking shoulders. The plate he was cleaning was dangerously close to falling. You prayed to the Gods to spare this child from the wrath of the woman next to him.
"The King's dinner my arse..." you grumbled as you started to dice the liver. "She doesn't give a damn about doing His Majesty a favour as long as she can torture us."
"What's worse is she doesn't realise that she doesn't need t'beat us. Just a whiff of her rotten breath and believe me, even the worst brigand would fall to their kn–"
Oswell Pyne stormed into the kitchen, his fist wrapped around the arm of a weeping Prudence.
You dropped the pestle at the sight of her swollen face. Her milky complexion faded into a mass of frightening bruises. The purple and blue weren't enough to hide the drops of blood beading at her temple and the edges of her lips.
What had this poor girl fallen into?
You immediately abandoned your post⏤to hell with the damn parsley⏤and tried to make your way through the other servants who had gathered at the entrance to the kitchens, just as eager to find out more. Gilliane insulted two or three of them, who immediately moved aside for fear of poking the Nordic woman and having to face her coarse tongue.
"Steward Oswell," Mylenda stammered. "To what do I owe your visit? You don't normally drop in until dinnertime, which, if I'm not mistaken, doesn't start for another two hours."
She turned to the maid, whose sobs had worsened at the sight of the old hag. Her headdress had been ripped off and her blonde hair was falling in knots over her tiny shoulders.
"Prudence, what have you done, girl?" she asked dryly. "Oh, sir... I hope she didn't cause you no trouble. My girls usually know how to behave."
"Well, it seems Prudence here has seen fit to answer back to His Majesty."
The whole kitchen fell in an uproar.
Mylenda, who ruled with an iron fist over the henhouse of the Red Keep’s maids, harped on to you all day long about the importance of keeping quiet. You still remembered your first day in the service of the Crown and the words she had screamed…
"Maids can gossip all they like in the kitchens, Gods know stirring a stew for two hours can put even the most seasoned of maids to sleep, but if I catch any of you uttering a single word outside these walls, they will be punished. The Lords don't need to be reminded that we exist. As soon as you stop smelling the kitchens, you shut up."
Shivers ran down your spine.
"Obviously," the steward continued, heedless of the chaos his words had unleashed, "Prudence didn't care about the repercussions such disastrous behaviour might have on the maids. Or on Mylenda herself. Am I right, girl? Own up your mistake."
He shook Prudence's arm and she let him, her chin trembling. You wanted to slap that horrible man, to make him swallow his arrogant smile, but what could you do but stand by and watch this horrifying spectacle?
Next to you, Gilliane cursed against the matron and the steward. Her insults were drowned out by the whispers of the other maids. Cass, her apron still stained with wine, was turned towards Ellyn, the baker. Even Hendry had leaned over to Dacey and was whispering something in his ear.
"Quiet, girls!" Mylenda shouted before turning back to Prudence. "Well, what are you waiting for? Speak up! For Gods’ sake, what's got into you?!"
"He... He tried to... To... I didn't want to... My father... he would have... No... I couldn't..."
Your heart fell into your stomach. Of course. You closed your eyes and breathed in to try and silence the flicker of indignation blossoming inside. The hubbub around you increased. Several girls gasped. A few had the courage to protest. Next to you, Gilliane grunted and clenched her fist.
How many more maids would have to suffer the same fate before someone took action? How many young girls would have to be broken, their prospects dripping down their aching thighs, because of the animal urges of one and the same man?
"And that gives you the right to answer back to the Lord of the Seven Kingdoms?" the steward growled. "You fool!"
The memory of Dyana still haunted the kitchens. No one dared mention her name for fear of invoking her tormentor, whom the aromas of poppy and dirty gold could not mask. How naive you had been to think this had been enough to keep him out… The executioner had invited himself into your ranks and was sowing his eternal seeds of destruction. Again and again and again.
Such was the luck of Targaryens and their royal blood while the small folk picked up the pieces and healed the wounds. Spoilt blood flowed and flowed and flowed without a care in the world. Who would stop the bleeding? Were we destined to die, our empty bodies turned towards the gold-covered hands that held the knife?
"I understand Prudence was to be one of the cupbearers at tonight's dinner. You can understand why the King would be... offended if he had to endure the sight of that... that seductress while he ate his meal. Would he not?"
Ashamed, the old woman grumbled under her breath, her cheeks flushed with embarrassment. Mylenda only cared about her reputation. She forgot that, like all of you, she was nothing. You frowned, disgusted by this dishonourable but not in the least surprising display.
"Of course, sir! Come here, girl!" Mylenda barked at Prudence before grabbing her hair and pulling her forward. "I'll show you what I do to maids who dare to talk back! You'll be sorry you didn't let the King get his way!"
Next to you, Gilliane took a step forward, ready to fight, but you held her back before she too sealed her fate. You had seen what happened to girls who dared to speak out and you didn't want to see your friend beaten to death by a stick.
Mylenda's crazed gaze swept across the assembly before coming to rest on you. She pointed at you with her bony finger.
"You! Gentle Hand! You'll be the cupbearer in Prudence’s stead. I hope you fill glasses better than you cut meat. I will not be humiliated any further by one of my maids. You will behave yourself and do me honour. Got it?"
You paled and glanced around in panic, but the other maids lowered their heads, happy not to have been chosen. Nobody wanted to be the cupbearer. Not since the coronation. Standing for hours enduring King Aegon's indecent babblings, his lips loosened by the acrid taste of wine, was an ordeal you all sought to avoid. Until now, you had managed to escape it, eternally hidden behind the steaming pots.
The Gods had now taken away your chance and were throwing you into the dragon pit.
You stammered incomprehensible words, pointing to the pieces of liver ready to be cooked, but Mylenda would have none of it and glared at you until you bowed your head and admitted defeat.
Oswell stood next to the matron, staring at you with his nose turned up⏤like watching an insect, you realised. He finally nodded and left the kitchen, slamming the door behind him.
His departure set off a firestorm. Gilliane turned sharply towards you, her grey eyes ablaze with rage.
"One day, I’ll gut him like a pig," she spat. "Mylenda. Oswell. They're rats, all of 'em."
You watched as the others busied themselves around Prudence. Cass wrapped a cloth around her shoulders and led her to a chair. Ellyn handed her a loaf of bread and forced her to eat before bringing a glass of water to her bruised lips.
"Poor girl," Gilliane continued but you were listening with a distracted ear. "She's far too good to work here. I'll pray t'the Old Gods for her tonight. Maybe they'll hear me and get her outta this hell ‘for the old cow gets the better of her."
The Northerner shook her head and, at last, looked at you, her eyes moistened with concern. She leaned towards you and asked if you were all right. Words fell short on the tip of your tongue, troubled by the sight of a destroyed Prudence and the evening ahead of you. Your chores consisted of cooking and washing cloths, nothing that would justify being in the company of the royal family.
You shrugged.
"If ya want, I can ask Mylenda to swap us," Gilliane suggested. "I don't want ya to have anything to do wi' him. Not after all that mess," she nodded at Prudence.
Henry was clumsily dressing up her wounds.
You shook your head.
"No. It'll only get you in trouble with the old cow. I'll go. It's just serving wine, isn't it? It can't be that bad."
"I guess," Gilliane conceded.
You knew very well that your friend wanted to protest. You could see her plea right at the edge of her lips, but you went back to your post and your persillade before she could tell it. Protesting wouldn't change anything, so you might as well get used to the idea and put up with it. You deliberately ignored the shiver of terror that ran down your spine at the thought of the King and grabbed a new sprig of parsley, chopped it roughly before adding it to the mortar.
Mylenda appeared beside you as you grabbed the pestle.
"What are you still doing here, girl? Didn't you hear me? Go and look after the wine. We still have to add the honey and decant it. And for Gods’ sake, change that bloody apron! Spare the royal family the sight of these hideous rags! Ahem. Right, then. Now, where was I? Henry, polish these bloody chalices!"
The old matriarch left you alone, arms flailing away.
Contrary to popular belief, the wine cellars were not next to the kitchens. You had to venture even further down to find the huge and cold rooms. You were already missing the lively melody of the kitchens before leaving them.
"We probably won't see each other again before dinner, so... Stay away from t’King," Gilliane whispered to you before pursing her lips. Her hand squeezed your shoulder painfully. "If anything happens, anything, tell me and I'll take care of it–"
"Don't you worry about me," you put an end to her budding act of betrayal.
She nodded, frowning and her gaze determined. It was hard to believe that this fiery fury had been bred by the icy winds of Longtown.
"Can you do something for me?"
"Anything," she replied immediately.
"Hide the roebuck skin."
Gilliane smiled and winked at you.
"As long as ya leave me some to mend me cloak."
"Deal."
You gave her a thin smile and abandoned the venison and parsley, your knife and mortar for barrels and crushed grapes. When you reached the caves, a cellarer was stirring wine in a gigantic pot. Beside him, another was pouring honey into the red bath. They were probably making the hypocras the King was so fond of.
"I... Mylenda sent me. I'm the cupbearer... For tonight’s… dinner..?"
The pourer interrupted your poor explanation and nodded towards the corner of the room.
"Make yourself useful and fill those jugs up, girl."
The two hours passed quicker than you had wished and soon you found yourself with your back against the wall, your arms already tired from carrying the jug of wine you had filled yourself.
You thought back to Mylenda and lowered your head a little more. Her orders, engraved in your skull, haunted you. You could almost feel the old woman's bony fingers wrap around your chin and yank it down. The labyrinthine floors of the Keep were not enough to blur the threat of the old woman. Even when she wasn't there, she forced you to keep your head down, your eyes glued to the floor and, above all, your mouth shut⏤if you dared utter a single word, you'd suffer her fury and her fist.
You remembered Prudence's swollen face and shivered. Aegon Targaryen may have cast the first stone in her doll's face, but you had no doubt that the matron would throw all the others and beat her to the bone. You tightened your grip on the jug's handle and prayed to the Gods to spare you from the same fate.
With a distracted ear, you listened to the Dowager Queen, Alicent Hightower, speak in a soft voice, but her words faded under the suffocating presence of the King. He stood close enough to you so that you could hear every gulp of wine drunk, every mouthful chewed open. He spat out your persillade and stained the white tablecloth with vulgar words, obviously caring little for decorum.
The perks of being King, you supposed.
Your mind wandered away from Kings and Queens to the hide under the worktop. Had Gilliane taken it away or was it still lying on the sticky kitchen floor? Would you keep the hair or turn it into a leather coat, less warm but more durable? After what Mylenda had called the "deer disaster", she wouldn't let you butcher any more animals. No more skins for you. You'd have to buy fabric, but the few silver stags you were given every month wouldn't be enough.
Despite the plump little purse hidden under your straw mattress, you refused to dip your hand into it. The Crown housed you and fed you; clothes were a mere futility when the Keep provided you with a red dress and a white apron to wear. So why spend your fortune, meagre though it may be, on coquettish whims? No. The purse would remain hidden until you left the Keep.
Leather it is, you thought.
"Girl. Wine."
You startled and hastily filled the glass the Hand held out to you. Otto Hightower glanced at you for a moment but said nothing. He took a sip and turned to continue his conversation with his grandson, Prince Aemond. You sighed, relieved when his attention left you. A small voice in your head, however, whispered to you that he would definitely mention this incident to Oswell, and if not to the steward, to Melynda herself.
You gulped and absent-mindedly wiped the drop of wine from the jug.
As you moved to regain your place by the wall, your eye drifted to the venison terrine in front of the Hand, left untouched. You frowned. The fruit and cheese had long since filled the plates and foretold the end of dinner. A bitter taste poisoned your mouth and tugged its corners down. They were happily wasting the food while, under their feet, maids would fight to trim the bones of their leftovers, like vile carrion-eaters around a leprous corpse.
The nobles boasted of their noble education and mastery of good manners, but these vanished in the indecency of their existence.
A pale hand burst in front of your eyes and stopped under your nose to present you with an empty cup. Without a word, you poured the King another drink and kept your head down. His insistent gaze burned the side of your face and moved lower, stopping on your heaving chest. The hair on the back of your neck stood on end and the handle of the jug pressed painfully into your sweaty palm.
You pig.
You looked around for a way out and found no better distraction than the Prince Aemond. Your gaze immediately fell on his eye patch. You were standing on his blind side, you realised. The thought reassured you. For the first time, you could observe the members of the royal family as you pleased.
Unlike his brother, the second son of the late King Viserys did not take pleasure in fondling servant girls. He spent his urges studying the texts and holding the blade when he wasn't off murdering his nephews⏤for the war that emptied your stomachs and purses had blossomed at the hand of Aemond Targaryen.
Your eyes fell on his clenched fist, his angular jaw and his famous leather eye patch.
Yes, you could easily picture him a as murderer.
You left your thoughts for a moment to serve the Dowager Queen again, noticing that there was nothing left of the parsleyed liver that had filled her plate⏤a flash of satisfaction shook you⏤but your gaze quickly returned to the statuesque figure of the Prince.
You frowned.
A crack split the fascinating sight. His hand was gripping his glass so tightly that his knuckles were turning white, but even this strong grip couldn't mask the tremors shaking his fingers. The veins in his wrist gushed against the pale skin and seemed to be screaming out a pain that no one could hear but you: the King had started singing, the Dowager Queen was biting her nails and the Hand seemed about to insult his Grace.
Other details suddenly jumped out at you, as the din next to you worsened: his eyebrows furrowed, his other hand gripping the edge of the table, his vacant purple eye. He wasn't even answering Otto Hightower any more, just nodding absently.
Prince Aemond soon had enough of his brother's ditty and stood up. The chair legs creaked against the floor and made you wince, but you lowered your head and pursed your lips. He greeted his family in a curt voice before leaving, his head held high, a far cry from the spectacle of weakness you had just witnessed.
"My glass isn't going to fill itself, girl. More wine. And don't be stingy. To the brim. I'm thirsty."
You watched in silence as the red liquid crashed into the golden glass. A fine foam rose to the surface, the syrupy aromas of the spiced wine oozing out of it. For a second, you indulged yourself in the divine fragrance and its sweetness, which almost made you forget the King's perverse eyes.
Aelinor stepped forward and cleared the Prince's place setting. She took the empty plate, then the glass, and soon it was as if Aemond Targaryen had never dined here. Only a round of wine, where his glass had been placed, was proof of his presence.
He had never asked for a refill, you realised.
For some reason, the vision of Prince Aemond stayed with you for days.
A new servant, Gretchel Stone⏤a bastard of the Vale⏤had been hired to replace Prudence as cupbearer and waitress. The blonde girl had disappeared from the Keep three days after what the maid now called 'The Accident'. Wherever she was, you prayed for her good fortune and health. The law of the Lords was merciless⏤they played games and let the Small Folk suffer the consequences of their actions.
If Prudence's departure had saddened you deeply, Gretchel's arrival had freed you from your duty as cupbearer. You were elated to be back in the kitchens and the laundry. The mere memory of the King's gaze still sent shivers down your spine. It stuck to your skin despite the hours you spent in the bath, rubbing and rubbing and rubbing. Your flesh, however raw, couldn't shed the terror.
The hour of the Nightingale enveloped the Keep in an unrivalled softness. You enjoyed this in-between moment, when the night clung to the fragments of moon that still remained and left the few early risers to enjoy the quiet that the sun would take away.
The journey to the Great Sept was quick and untroubled. The few drunkards sprawled out on the ground in their own filth were fast asleep and the laborers already working had no use for you. Wrapped up in Gilliane’s cloak, your friend still asleep, you hurried on⏤soon, the Red Keep would awaken and duty would crush you.
When you finally passed through the monument's great doors, septas were silently cleaning the wax from yesterday’s burnt-out candles.
You passed them and knelt before the wall of the Crone, letting your gaze drift over her wrinkled statue and the murals carved in her honour before taking a splint and lighting a candle. You clasped your hands together and closed your eyes.
"Dear Crone," you whispered, "You who have seen so many lives and so many fates, grant me clairvoyance and discernment, for the future seems full of trials. Give me patience in my struggle and the strength to act with justice and compassion. Enlighten my steps and bless me with your mercy."
A bruised, stoic face appeared before your eyes, but you stood up before your thoughts drifted into those dangerous waters.
Lowly people need not concern themselves with the affairs of a Prince, an unknown voice said firmly.
When you returned to the Keep, it had come alive, bustling with hurry and duty. The kitchens were busy preparing meals for the Lords as other maids were coming and going, their arms drowned in clean and dirty linen. When Mylenda saw you, she threw a white pile into your arms and ordered you to change Prince Aemond's bedding.
"Gwenys, the poor girl, is ill," the matriarch explained. "The flu, no doubt. Bloody business. I'll be damned if the Prince catches it. He breaks his fast an hour after dawn. Any minute now, in fact. Make haste, Gentle Hand! And don't let anyone see you."
You stammered your obedience and hurried to Maegor's Citadel. The huge closed doors sent shivers down your spine. They separated you from the power of the World and its cruelty. The blood of the dragon slumbered in these quarters and you would not be the one to poke the sleeping beast. Your gaze fell on the King's chambers ⏤had an innocent soul once again fallen to his cruelty last night?⏤but you lowered your head and continued on your way.
You knocked on the door⏤your knuckles hitting the carved wood painfully ⏤but nobody answered. Your shoulders relaxed and your breathing calmed. The heavy door would not budge as you tried to push it open. Where were the Kingsguards? You threw your entire weight against the wood and when it finally did open, a thick layer of sweat was soaking your back.
Your eyes quickly swept over the Prince's quarters, drowned in the distinct opulence of royalty. In one corner, a bookcase was overflowing with ancient tomes and the smell of parchment filled the room. On the walls, murals glorifying House Targaryen caught your eye, but you forced yourself to keep your chin down, your mouth shut, and moved towards the bed, ignoring its warm and cosy appearance, a far cry from your straw mattress.
The four-poster bed alone was bigger than the small room you shared with Gilliane. Its tastefully embroidered green and black curtains caught your eye, but you resisted the urge to touch them.
Your arms went to work on their own and fell into familiar gestures.
You pulled off the worn sheets⏤trying not to think about the fluids trapped in them⏤rolled them into a ball and let them fall to the floor before taking the new ones and draping them over the feather-filled mattress. At last, you fluffed the cushions, releasing a musky and unmistakably masculine scent in the air. It floated in your nostrils. Your heart raced and your cheeks flushed. A little voice⏤sounding strangely like Mylenda’s⏤discouraged you from giving in to temptation, but the perfume numbed your senses and your reason.
Your trembling hand grasped the cloth and brought it to your face... Already, the scent caressed your cheeks. You gasped, your lips parted, ready to taste this intoxicating bouquet...
The door slammed.
The cushion fell from your hand.
You scrambled to your feet, almost tripping over the pile of dirty sheets on the floor.
The look on Prince Aemond's face made your blood run cold.
"Out."
Head down, you picked up the linens and left, taking care not to approach the Prince, who was visibly enraged. As you passed him, his gasping breath caught in your eardrum. You risked a glance in his direction and glimpsed at his clenched fist.
Just like at dinner.
The doors closed behind you with a slam that startled you. You had just enough time to hear a grunt and see the Prince's silhouette collapse to the floor. You paled and opened your mouth, ready to offer help, but Mylenda's threats came back to haunt you. You lowered your chin and disappeared around the corner of the corridor, determined to turn a deaf ear to the Prince's groans of pain.
Surely he would have ordered you to stay or fetch a Maester if he felt the need. His silence said it all, didn't it? A creature as proud as Aemond Targaryen probably wanted to be left alone to brood over the illness that was tormenting him. Perhaps Gwenys flu had affected more people than Mylenda thought.
Yes, that must be it.
Gwenys' ailment had turned out to be much more than the flu. Blood flux, a nasty ordeal… Oswell and Mylenda had tried to keep the matter quiet so as not to alert the Lords and give them more reason to hate the servants they were condemned to brush shoulders with. Several maids were dismissed from their duties to stop the spread of the disease⏤better letting it grow in Flea Bottom than the Keep, the steward had said⏤and their tasks had fallen on the already stooping shoulders of the remaining workers.
Busy changing the Prince's sheets at dawn and working in the kitchens during the rest of the day, it had become difficult to find time to pray to the Crone and the Mother in the Great Sept. This new schedule left you exhausted and irritated. Gilliane sometimes had to wake you up⏤something that would have been unthinkable just two weeks earlier. You were finding it hard to mourn the Hour of the Nightingale and the peace and quiet that Mylenda had forced you to give up. Now you had to pray in your room late at night, with the smell of cooking and soap still clinging to your skin.
But the Gods turned a deaf ear to your pleas and left you to face alone the guilt that grew in your heart each time you abandoned the Prince to his painful fate.
Your mornings were structured around a heavy sense of déjà vu. No matter how late you changed the Prince's linens, he would always appear and order you to leave with a booming voice before collapsing in a tornado of pain that, strangely enough, broke your heart.
"I don't know what's wrong with him," you shrugged. But I'm sure... I mean… It can't be the blood flux," you dared to whisper the forbidden word. "His sheets are always clean. I've never found any blood or vomit or... or anything. No... It must be some other affliction. For it to happen every day... Maybe it's his spirit? With all this talk of war... Oh, it's terrible. And strange. I can't stop thinking about it. Perhaps I should speak to the Maester..."
You stirred the contents of the pot absent-mindedly. As you had predicted, Melynda no longer trusted you to cut the meat and had assigned you to the sauces, much to your delight⏤the dreadful scent of fresh had been replaced by bouquets of redcurrant, wine and mustard.
Next to you, Gilliane cut a rabbit’s head in one clean stroke.
« Dozens of masters would travel from the Citadel just to treat him. It's not yer job to worry about him. He doesn't deserve it and it’ll only get ya into trouble. Maybe it's a ploy to bed ya. ‘Ve heard he spends lotta nights in the Street of Silk."
"Hmm... I doubt that's it. What's the point of dismissing me, then? If it was a ploy to... to do that… wouldn't it be easier to let me help him? I don't think the Prince is like his brother. No... He seems genuinely unwell."
"Generations of incest do that to ya," your friend scoffed. "It's about time the Gods punished 'em for their sins... These Greens are rotten to the core and you'd do well to remember that. These... These usurpers are–"
"More cutting and less talking, girls. The Crown pays you to fill stomachs, not to gossip like wenches. If working is such a bother, I'll be happy to replace you with obedient young ladies. Hundreds of them dream of your position in Flea Bottom."
"Yes, ma'am," you replied in unison.
Gilliane waited until Mylenda had gone before turning back to you, the bloody tip of her knife pointed towards you.
"Don't waste your prayers on that kinslayer. And keep away from him, d’ya hear me? There's something evil about that boy, I know it."
You nodded silently and stopped your thoughts from drifting to the Targaryen man. Perhaps Gilliane was right. A prince's business was none of your concern and it would be foolish to think otherwise.
Yes, you would do your chores quietly and let the lords play their game and fight their demons alone.
Prince Maelor's flushed and tearful face refused to leave your mind as you took his dirty linens to the laundry. You did not normally look after the King's heirs⏤Queen Helaena preferred to entrust this task to her trusted servants since that night⏤but a panicked Jenny had stormed into the corridor of Maegor's Citadel, a crying Jaehaera in her arms, as you went to the Prince's room. You had not hesitated to volunteered to take the soiled sheets to be washed; on the contrary, you welcomed the distraction with open arms⏤everything was good to postpone the duty that awaited you.
The smell of urine emanating from the sheets in your arms made you wince and quicken your pace, but your heart wept for this little toddler whom life had not spared. The King's last child had been prone to accidents since the barbaric assassination of Prince Jaehaerys⏤no doubt the traumatic death of his brother had upset him, as it had all the inhabitants of the Keep.
Once the sheets had been dropped off, you turned around and retraced your steps until you arrived in front of Prince Aemond's room. You swore under your breath as noises pierced the wood. The sun, already high in the sky, was taunting you. Your little diversions had only delayed your duty, not erased it despite your prayers, and now you had to change the Prince's bedding with the man in the room.
Maybe he would not care to hold it against you... After all, he told you to leave every day, whether his linens were changed or not. You turned on your heels and were about to head for the kitchens and Gilliane, but a scream stopped you in your tracks.
A second followed, then a third. You glanced around, hoping to see a Royal Guard burst around the corner, but no white cloak appeared. The corridors remained empty and the Prince's screams continued to ricochet off the alcoves and ceiling mouldings with you as the only ear listening.
Over your shoulder, the door taunted you. It was ajar, you realised. An unusual lack of attention from the Prince. You took a step towards it, keeping your eyes fixed on the small gap. Soon, the Prince's silhouette came into view.
On the ground, wearing only a shirt and trousers, Aemond Targaryen was shaking like a leaf, a trembling hand pressed against his bruised eye. A new wave of pain must have swept through him as he curled into himself and screamed.
You rushed to his side.
"Are you all right, my prince?" you asked breathlessly. Mylenda and her orders be damned. "Would you like me to fetch the Maester?"
Your hand hovered over his shoulder, which twitched with agony, but you did not dare to touch it for fear of retaliation. The Targaryen man raised his head with an almost bestial growl, resembling the dragon on his coat of arms. When he recovered enough to understand who was standing in front of him, his eyebrows furrowed and his complexion flushed with anger. Your heart skipped a beat and fear seeped through your veins in a matter of seconds.
"Get out," he gritted before turning his head⏤no, hiding.
"My Prince, I fear I must insist. Your eye–"
His eye patch had slipped off and, although it didn't unveil the horror that lay behind it, it did reveal a red and irritated scar. The lower eyelid was now a mass of inflamed skin. You turned your head and saw a bottle of milk of the poppy overturned, its translucent liquid staining the floor.
"Get out or I'll have your head!"
You jumped. In an impulse you would no doubt regret, your fingers went to his bruised cheek and brushed against the burning skin to feel the damage before you squeaked. The Prince's hand tightened around your wrist and squeezed, squeezed, squeezed, until you yelped and abruptly pulled away. Pain colonised your palm, your fingers you could now barely move, and the bone at the centre of it all. You got up on shaky knees and walked away, leaving the Prince alone with his torments.
Instead of heading for the kitchens, your legs led you to Maester Orwyle's dark and silent storerooms. No doubt he was busy deciding the fate of the kingdom with the other members of the Small Council. Silently, you slipped through the door and lit a candlestick before examining the shelves filled with ingredients of all kinds, some perhaps older than you. Hundreds of labels jumped out at you, but none caught your eye until the orange of a jar lit up your retina.
You glanced behind you and were relieved to see the room still empty. Hastily, you uncorked the jar and dipped your hand in. Your fingers brushed against the softness of its contents before closing around it. You repeated the operation once, twice, thrice, until your pockets were overflowing with expensive and precious ingredients. When it came to stealing the powder you needed, you hesitated but ended up finding a small wooden bowl, insignificant enough so that no one would notice it missing.
Just as you were about to leave, the faint glow of the candle caught on a small metal container and blinded you. You read its familiar inscription before dropping it, too, into your apron and setting off again, praying to the Gods that the Maester didn't notice the missing ingredients, otherwise you'd certainly end up on the scaffold.
Your footsteps hit the floor of the Keep. The corridors gave way to staircases that revealed the lower floors, hiding your bedroom. Once you were safe, you tossed your loot onto the bed before digging out a mortar and a sticky jar from underneath it. With trembling hands, you dipped a wooden dish into a bucket of clear water normally used for bathing before grabbing the pestle.
In the mortar, you emptied the bag of green clay and drowned it in the water before stirring. The pain in your wrist redoubled, but you gritted your teeth and persevered. You added the marigold and camomile petals, then the gooey inside of a Dorne plant whose name you didn't know, before adding two large spoonfuls of honey.
The neck of the metal container hung in the air for a few seconds. Was that wise? You hesitated, thinking back to the bottle spilt in the Prince's room, but gave in to temptation and let three drops fall into the concoction.
You ran back towards Maegor's Citadel and snuck into the Prince's quarters. He raised his head and his features quickly contorted with rage at your sight.
"You again! I shall speak to the steward of your–"
You threw the mortar on the floor, along with some bandages, before turning around and slamming the door. Your back slid against its wood until you fell to the floor, gasping for air.
Seven Hells, what have I done?
For a week, your nights were spent praying to the Gods to spare you from the Prince's rage. Sleep slipped away in night terrors that always woke you with a start, leaving you paranoid enough to look over your shoulder every few minutes, waiting for the inevitable. A beating by Mylenda, a dismissal by the steward, even a visit from the Royal Guard... but nothing happened. And that somehow made it worse. Perhaps the Prince wanted to deal with you alone. A series of shivers made you waver. He was terrifying, untouchable⏤impunity incarnated. If anyone found out what you'd done...
No. No one would know, you tried to convince yourself.
You decided to keep the incident from Gilliane, who wouldn't have understood anyway. No doubt she would even have chastised you for not leaving him to die on the icy floor of the Keep. A staunch supporter of Rhaenyra, she hated the idea of working for the enemy. You had no thought on the subject. Politics did not matter to you as long as you were paid and the Gods let you live. You wouldn't spit on the hand that fed and housed you.
It was comfort that kept you under the yoke of Mylenda and her petrifying breath, not ideology.
The dirt on the King's sheets dissipated in the icy water of the washroom. Your purple fingers struggled to wring the fabric. Terrified of having to face the Prince and reap the consequences of your reckless act, you had asked Mylenda to change your chores in the morning. Fortunately, the matron didn't argue too much, sending you away with just a barb about your hands⏤as was her custom⏤before returning to her duties. Washing clothes had never been your forte, but you preferred it to Aemond Targaryen’s presence.
Two more weeks passed without the Prince making his presence felt. He seemed to have disappeared from the Keep. According to the other maids, his appearances at meals were brief and always tense, and some had even seen him lose a duel during his sparring sessions with Criston Cole.
When you realised that the Prince would not take revenge, your shoulders relaxed and your mind returned to more pleasant thoughts.
How naive of you to think that Aemond One-Eye would give up.
He cornered you in a corridor one evening as you were making your way to your room. Your fingers were itching to do something other than stir sauces and wash cloths. The deerskin, hidden under your bed and still intact, was waiting for you. With all this fuss, you had never found the time to make your long-awaited coat, a decision you bitterly regretted⏤the cold had definitely fallen on King's Landing and left you shivering when your chores weren't there to warm you up.
A hand pulled you into an alcove. You attempted to struggle but the stranger quickly overpowered you, leaving you unable to move or scream. White streaks cascaded in front of your eyes, carrying a distinct musky smell which stunned you into compliance.
By the Gods, he had come seeking revenge.
Aemond Targaryen was going to kill you.
"Which Maester did you steal that poultice from?"
His sharp tone was terrifying. Tears welled up in the corners of your eyes and a squeak fell from your lips. The prince turned you towards him, waiting for an answer, but you didn't know what to say. Your thoughts were all jumbled together, rendering you as mute as Cromm, the horse keeper from Flea Bottom. He was close, so close that you could see the grain of his skin, the purple of his eye and the scar on his cheek⏤less red than last time, you noticed.
"Answer me, girl. Where did you find this ointment? Maester Orwyle assures me he has no knowledge of it. Nor do his colleagues. No one in this Keep knew of its existence until I mentioned it. So speak up!"
You stammered a few words, incomprehensible even to your own ears. This seemed to frustrate the Prince to no end as he tightened his grip on your arm.
Your wrist throbbed, reminiscing the pain.
"If you do not tell me who–"
"It’s mine," you cut him off, eager to free yourself from his grip. "I made it."
The silence stretched and wrapped around your neck in a horrifying premonitory vision.
"... You? »
"Yes?"
He glared at you. The darkness of the alcove didn't dull the brilliance of his purple irises. It glowed and made your heartbeat quicken. Legends said the Targaryens were closer to Gods than men and you couldn't help but agree, blessed enough to contemplate their work.
"Hm."
The pressure on your arm vanished.
"You will tend to my linens. The new maid cannot do it properly."
The Prince turned around and disappeared into the night.
The green and black curtains of the four-poster bed had long lost their novelty but none of their splendour. You fluffed the pillow before picking up the duvet. The musky scent of the Prince invaded your nostrils and dilated your pupils. You'd never admit it, but you were relieved to find yourself back in the quarters of the Dowager Queen’s second son. No more freezing water. No more soiled sheets. No more vomit and sperm staining the King's robes.
The Prince entered the room without a word, but his panting alerted you. Over your shoulder, you caught a glimpse of his clenched fists, furrowed brows and soaked forehead... You didn't wait for him to dismiss you before curtseying, your headdress almost falling off. You gathered up the sheets and headed for the door, but he held out a hand.
"Stay. I've... I've got to..."
The sheets fell at your feet as the Prince wobbled. Your hands struggled to hold on to his torso, which, in its mass, threatened to send you to the floor too. With clenched teeth, you guided the man to his bed, ignoring the stabbing pain in your arms, and immediately covered him with a blanket, not caring that you had spent time tucking it.
"What... what should I do? Should I fetch Maester Orwyle? Or someone else? A guard? Ser Criston Cole, perhaps?"
The situation was surreal. Prince Aemond Targaryen, kinslayer and rider of Vhagar, was turning to you for help. A spark of jubilation ignited in your chest but panic spoiled the moment. Large beads of sweat beaded on the Prince’s forehead and ran down his skin to his twitching eyebrow. Your eyes widened at the sight. The whole left side of his face was twitching and convulsing.
You were right to add chamomile, you thought gravely.
Prince Aemond had spasms, his muscles never healed from the loss of his eye.
A pang lacerated your heart at the thought of this young boy, fated to suffer in silence during all those years.
A warm sensation brought you back to the present. A pale and large hand had engulfed yours and was gripping it so tightly that you winced. But you said nothing, just whispered words of encouragement that were drowned out by his groans. He was no longer the terrifying Prince the maids talked about. He was turning into the fragile, battered being he had once been before your very eyes
"Do you... have your... your poultice?" he managed to say.
You shook your head. The prince had started to shiver. In a fit of bravery, you placed the back of your hand against his forehead and found it burning. A spark of panic ignited your chest.
Fever was never a good sign.
"Can you... Can you make some?"
"I–" you stammered. "My Prince... The ingredients are not easy to find."
"Paper… And a quill."
Not wanting to exhaust him further, you rushed to his secretary and promptly grabbed the items before running back to his bedside. He grasped it with a trembling hand and scribbled something on a roll of paper before handing it to you.
"Give this to Maester Orwyle. He'll grant you access to his supplies. I... I need your help."
With a determined nod, you set off in the direction of the healer's quarters, who was stunned by your request before letting you in. The man watched you make the ointment in silence. The weight of his gaze slid over your tense body, too concentrated on your movements to pay attention. You left, throwing a thank-you over your shoulder, and returned to Aemond's room, out of breath and with your heart pounding against your temples.
The Prince had not moved. He only moved when you handed him the pot.
"Can you... put it on me?" he asked in a small voice.
So, you, the ever-dutiful maid, did what you knew best and obeyed.
Gently, you removed his eye patch with his permission and dipped a bandage in the poultice before placing it on his wound. You were careful not to stare at his wound for too long. The Prince was tense, uncomfortable with the idea of his face bare. His hand had found a piece of your apron and was clinging to it like a mussel to a rock in the vain hope of finding comfort. Sometimes, in an uncharacteristic show of bravery, you would let your fingers caress his before taking a new strip and starting the operation all over again.
Soon his scar was entirely covered with the ointment except for his eyelid, whose bright red flesh alarmed you.
"You must remove the sapphire, my prince," you murmured, thus speaking into existence what had until then remained silent.
He tensed under your fingers. A rustle echoed in the room. His hand had torn off a piece of your apron. You swallowed and looked down.
Had you gone too far?
Mylenda will beat you for ruining your apron, a more urgent voice reminded you.
"Your eye socket is irritated," you tried to explain. "And the pressure of the gem seems to be... making it worse. Perhaps it would be best to let the flesh rest and not torture it any further."
"Turn around."
Your eyes latched onto the drapes and slid higher, over the murals. Dragons were drowning castles in their flames, ridden by white-haired men. Behind you, something clanged against the bedside table. Here and there, blue reflections ricocheted off the wall and drowned the blaze in a fragmented ocean.
"Resume."
A gasp escaped from your throat before you could take it back, horrified by the new mural, even more violent than the war scene you had just abandoned. There was nothing left of the eyelid. The empty eye socket clung to the remaining skin, but it was tangled up in a carnal mess⏤the work of a hurried butcher. The roebuck galloped into your mind. Mylenda would have grumbled at the sloppy stitching.
"Resume," he repeated.
His voice trembled with rage.
Silently, you wet yet another strip of cloth and placed it on the remnants of his eyelid with a trembling hand. Your finger grazed his temple before falling back into your lap. Once again, the Prince grabbed your apron. The chamomile perfumed the room, releasing its soothing fragrance all around you, but he remained impervious to it, battered by pain and ghosts.
With his face wrapped in white clothes, Aemond Targaryen resembled the dead king.
At least the spasms had subsided. That reassured you. The first bands were already hardening and working their miracle. The hollows in his forehead had disappeared, his body finally giving itself a well-deserved rest. The Prince let himself fall back against his pillows.
You took this sign as a dismissal and got up, not wanting to impose your presence on him any longer. The dirty sheets from the night before were still lying on the floor. Mylenda was probably wondering what you were up to. Gilliane couldn't make up excuses indefinitely.
"Stay."
"I have to get back to the kitchen. And your sheets..."
"Stay," he commanded in a weak voice.
What could you do but make yourself comfortable at the Prince's bedside? The order sounded like a request, but no doubt he would have taken your refusal as an affront. He was still a noble and nobles did not like to be contradicted.
"Can you touch my cheek? Your hands... Your hands help."
His purple eye rolled in its socket and struggled to stay awake as it rested on you. The Prince was not in his right mind. The pain left him bare before you, vulnerable. What could be more dangerous than a vulnerable Targaryen? He would wrap you in his secrets, not caring that you would surely burn in them. In the Red Keep, it was wiser to remain ignorant. To be a confidant was to meddle in unknown and dangerous matters.
Mylenda was right. You should have kept your mouth shut.
So you said nothing as the Prince grabbed your hand and pressed it against his cheek. His courage seemed to surprise him, for he tensed before relaxing and pressing back against your hand, desperately seeking the warmth of your palm. His lips parted and he sighed. Your cheeks flushed at the sensual sound, but you clung to the illusion of peace that embraced the room and buried your fears in a corner of your chest.
It was easier to cooperate.
Your fingertips traced his temple, the arch of his eyebrow, the hollow of his cheek, the bridge of his nose, and then repeated the exploration on the other side. His purple eye disappeared behind an intact eyelid, so different from the other. He sighed happily and curled up against you. The grip on your apron loosened. His breathing slowed.
"Mummy."
The moan pierced the silence and took the peace with it, leaving only the cruel reality. She laughed at you and your naivety. Your blood turned cold. A wide purple eye looked into yours. You immediately stood up and mumbled an apology. The Prince followed suit, despite the pain. A bandage fell with a wet noise onto the sheet but, for once, you could not bring yourself care. Your eyes remained stuck on your hands.
Stupid, stupid girl. What had you done? Touching a Prince like that? If His Highness didn't take care of you, the steward would beat you⏤like Prudence, like all the others. And Mylenda... The horror squeezed your stomach painfully and twisted your guts.
"If you tell anyone about this, I'll–"
Hot tears rolled down your cheek and dried your skin before landing on your trembling lips. You shook your head frantically and picked up the pile of dirty sheets before running for the door.
If there was one thing Mylenda had taught you, it was to shut up.
#★ WRITING#aemond fanfic#aemond targaryen x reader#aemond x reader#aemond fanfiction#aemond series#aemond angst#aemond targaryen#hotd fanfic#hotd aemond#hotd x reader#house of the dragon x reader#house of the dragon fanfic
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Cannibals [Chapter 4: Foxes and Sailfish]
Series summary: You are his sister, his lover, his betrothed despite everyone else’s protests; you have always belonged to Aemond and believe you always will. But on the night he returns from Storm’s End with horrifying news, the trajectories of your lives are irrevocably changed. Will the war of succession make your bond permanent, or destroy the twisted and fanatical love you share?
Chapter warnings: Language, sexual content (18+ readers only), awkward interactions on a boat, making friends in the Vale, references to war-related violence, Aemond flashbacks haunt the narrative, Red and Jace share an exciting new experience!
Word count: 5.8k
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The fireplace crackles, there’s smoke in the air. The shards of seashells take shape on the board as you affix them with paste made of boiled bones, unloved bodies you’ve scavenged: rabbits, foxes, deer, weasels, squirrels, snakes, turtles, birds. Sometimes Criston will find you searching for carcasses in the garden or the Godswood—a basket full of skulls and ribs, hands covered with dirt—and beg you to go back to Maegor’s Holdfast where you belong. He says: Please, princess, let me do that for you. I’ll bring you all the bones you need. This is too grisly a task for young ladies. And then, when you try to refuse him: Red, it hurts your mother when you’re like this. And so you accept his offer and surrender your basket, knowing that being the daughter Mother wishes you were will always require pretending.
Aemond is in bed, freshly rid of his left eye and floating in a silent, pearlescent lake of milk of the poppy. He is unconscious for now, but he can only have a dose every six hours, and when it begins to wear off he becomes feverish and fearful. You can’t leave him. Aemond is a year older than you, always just a little bit wiser, always quicker and steadier on his feet; you have never known a world without him in it. But now he is the one who needs you. This is a strange feeling.
Mother, Criston, Helaena, and Maester Orwyle are always gliding in and out of the room—whispering, grim-faced ghosts—but at the moment you are alone with Aemond. A shadow appears in the doorway. It’s Aegon, and his face is marred too: there’s a bruise on his cheekbone from where someone hit him, Grandsire or Mother. He is slumped against the doorframe with a goblet of wine in his hand. He takes a slurp and uses his cup to gesture to where Aemond is sleeping. It’s a question.
“He’s alright, Aegon,” you say. “He’s resting. He’s healing.”
He licks his lips and skims his fingerprint around the rim of the goblet, pensive. “I wasn’t there.”
“None of us were.”
“Does he blame me for what happened?”
“He hasn’t said anything.”
“But you would know if he felt it.”
Would I? Sometimes you don’t believe you know Aemond as well as they imagine you do. There have always been things he doesn’t tell you. You didn’t know he was planning to claim Vhagar. He is unpredictable, he is a deep reservoir of secrets; he taunts you, he guards you, he ignores you, he comes rushing back. You say to Aegon: “I don’t think he blames you.”
Aegon exhales, drunken exhausted relief. “Good.”
Beneath blankets that Helaena has embroidered with legends from the Age of Heroes, Aemond stirs. His remaining eye—glazed, drugged, an empty anemic blue—flutters opens and drifts to you. “Now we know why you don’t have a dragon,” he says, weak and raspy. “The price has gone up. They cost an eye each.”
You paint a sliver of a cerulean-colored shell with glue. “I’d pay that if I knew it would work.”
Aemond asks, as if it has been weighing on him: “Do I horrify you?”
You smile softly. “No more than you did before.”
From where he still loiters in the doorway nursing his wine, Aegon snickers. Aemond grins, then winces from the pain it causes him. “What are you making?”
“It’s Symeon Star-Eyes,” you say, tilting up the mosaic so he can see it better. “You read us that story, remember? He was a knight who used a staff with blades at both ends to cut down his enemies. He was blinded in combat, so he replaced his eyes with sapphires.”
“Sapphires,” Aemond mumbles drowsily.
“Yes.”
“Blue.”
“Like you,” you say, thinking of his game piece: the blue wolf, a mournful color, a beast that kills.
“Hm,” he murmurs to himself as he sinks back into sleep; and it’s not until Aemond’s wound has healed that you learn of the idea you’ve given him.
~~~~~~~~~~
Vermax is not an especially imposing dragon, a drab sort of green and smaller than Sunfyre, but he is frightening enough when he bares his teeth. He snarls and snaps at you, unloosed fire roiling up in his throat. You stand perhaps ten paces away from him, flinching away from the heat that refracts the air and puts ripples in it like disturbed water. Jace is attempting to soothe Vermax, a palm pressed to the beast’s scales. Rhaenyra and Daemon are watching, confounded.
“Mother wasn’t exaggerating,” you tell them. You are crestfallen; this is a humiliation. You have silver hair and undisputed parentage, and yet Jace is the one whose egg hatched. So who is the true Targaryen?
“Very, very peculiar,” Daemon muses, scratching his chin. He turns to Rhaenyra. “Make her get closer, let’s see what happens.”
“Daemon,” Rhaenyra says impatiently. In the light of day, you can observe her face more clearly. There are dark semicircles under her eyes, and lines that didn’t exist before Luke was killed. She is ten years closer to the grave than she was the night her father died.
You cannot see the riots from where you’re standing in the castle courtyard, but you can hear them, the ambient rumbling of people rejecting Rhaenyra’s rule. They decry the slaughter of Jaehaerys. They shout demands of proof that the imprisoned Greens are alive and well: Mother, Helaena, Jaehaera, Maelor, you. Fear of Rhaenyra’s soldiers and her dragons may delay their wrath, but you don’t believe she can quell it. High overhead, Sheepstealer sails past the Red Keep, casting a massive shadow. Rhaenyra’s frown deepens. Daemon pretends not to notice.
“Very well,” Rhaenyra sighs, summoning Jace to return to her and abandon his attempts to quiet Vermax. Dutifully—though perhaps not without resentment—he acquiesces. Vermax is still growling at you. You glower back, wishing that Vhagar was here to eat him. “There are other ways to get to Heart’s Home. A ship will take longer, ten days or two weeks depending on the wind. The journey should be safe. The Sea Snake’s blockade controls Blackwater Bay, and the Greens have no navy.” Rhaenyra looks to you. “That’s still correct, isn’t it? The usurper was refused by the Greyjoys?”
“I don’t know,” you lie.
She gives you a disapproving glare and then turns her attention back to Jace. “Alyn of Hull can take you to the Vale in his ship. I’m sure Corlys can manage without him for a matter as important as this. I’ve sent a raven ahead to the Corbrays. They’ll be expecting you, and you’ll be married upon your arrival, with Lord and Lady Corbray serving as witnesses. You have until then to get accustomed to each other.”
Jace begins to mutter a protest, low enough that you can’t hear. Rhaenyra shushes him. Vermax takes flight and soars out towards the ocean. You step closer to the castle wall and listen to the clamor of the crowds, willing them to rise up and free your family, to destroy Rhaenyra’s. Daemon stalks you around the courtyard, unsheathing Dark Sister and whistling so you know how near he is. You refuse to acknowledge him.
Rhaenyra is telling Jace: “When the war is won, the Greens’ surviving loyalists will accept you as my heir if you are married to her and father her children.”
“What about Aegon? What if Aemond and Criston manage to smuggle him into hiding somewhere, and then one day he reappears and—?”
“Aegon won’t live,” Rhaenyra says confidently. “From what we’ve heard, his burns must be dreadful. He will succumb to them, hopefully slowly and with great pain, and in the meantime Aemond and Vhagar will be pinned down in the eastern Crownlands tending to him. And even once Aemond is unincumbered, he will not want to fly into battle against Caraxes and Sheepstealer together. Vhagar is fearsome, but she is old and slow. Aemond is cunning. He knows this.”
“You told Alicent we’d pardon him,” Jace says, and his tone is accusatory. How could you? How dare you?
“I said I’d spare him if he’s still alive when the war is over,” Rhaenyra replies with a sharp glance. “So let’s make sure he isn’t.”
~~~~~~~~~~
Dinner is sailfish, which you’ve never eaten before. All afternoon you saw them zipping through the water as Alyn of Hull’s ship cruised out of King’s Landing and towards the Gullet, their sapphire dorsal fins cutting up through the surf. Then the crew caught some and hauled them up onto the deck—large bulging eyes, toothless mouths agape as they suffocated in open air—and you watched as the fish were gutted and their scales and organs scrubbed from the planks with seawater that turned rosy with blood. Refuse washed back into the ocean: bones, fins, disembodied eyeballs dragging tails of optic nerves.
Alyn is a bastard of Corlys Velaryon, you’ve gathered; he is young to have been entrusted with his own vessel, and the resemblance is undeniable. He is chivalrous but very strict. You are not permitted in the room where several caged ravens are kept in case Alyn has to send a message back to the capital. You are not permitted to stand too close to the ship’s railing. You are not permitted to handle anything that could be used as a weapon. You are not permitted to converse with the crew. In truth, you are allowed to do almost nothing.
Now you are below deck, you and Jace seated at opposite ends of a long wooden table and alone except for two guards posted by the door. Tall white candles flicker, wobbling in their brass stands as the ship rocks. You drink too much wine and pick at your sailfish, pinkish lumps of meat seasoned with garlic and lemon juice. Jace pushes roasted parsnips and green beans around aimlessly on his plate. You can’t stop thinking of the family you’ve left behind: Mother and Helaena in a dungeon, Jaehaera and Maelor taken hostage by Rhaenyra, Daeron at war in the Reach, Aegon horrifically burned, Aemond and Criston battling to save him.
I shouldn’t be safe while they’re suffering. It’s wrong, it’s treasonous. I’m the least worthy of us. I’ve done nothing to help us win this war. I haven’t saved anyone.
You keep hoping for a vision of what Aemond is doing, what he is feeling, but you’ve never had any control over the glimpses you get into his mind. They are random, and brief, and fragmented. You don’t know if Aegon is still alive. You don’t know if Aemond is thinking of you.
“So that’s why you don’t have a dragon,” Jace says suddenly, and you look up at him, startled. He’s staring at you from beneath the dark curls that have fallen over his face, the mark of House Strong. He’s not entirely unappealing, if you don’t judge him as a Valyrian, an enemy combatant, a traitor. You can’t tell if Jace is being smug or sincere; you barely know him. “Because they hate you.”
Mother’s words resurface in your skull like sailfish dredged up from the waves: If you care for Aemond, as I know you do, you will give him a chance if he and Criston cannot win on the battlefield. You will earn Jace’s affection and convince him to spare us.
You aren’t sure how to earn anybody’s affection. With everyone you’ve known before you either had it or you didn’t, and that never seemed like something you could change.
“It’s not for lack of trying,” you say, fidgeting uneasily with your wine cup. “I tried to claim Vermithor when I was a child. He nearly killed me.”
Jace’s dark eyebrows go up. “Did he? On Dragonstone?”
You nod. “Grandsire arranged for us to visit the island while your family was travelling elsewhere. Driftmark, maybe, I don’t remember. I had always wanted Vermithor, and I felt…I knew that if I found him he would bond to me and let me ride him. I followed him all over Dragonstone for days, but he kept moving, and then…when I finally got close enough…” You’d outrun Criston and the other guards, but Aemond had been there to pull you out of the path of Vermithor’s flames; yet you don’t think Jace will want to hear this. It feels impossible to extricate Aemond from your memories. You’ve never known a life he was not intrinsically entwined with. “The Bronze Fury made his discontentment clear.”
Jace narrows his eyes and gives you an ironic smile, as if he’s thinking: Too bad you lived. “So you gave up.”
“Oh no, I tormented the others too. Silverwing, Grey Ghost, Seasmoke, none of them were very welcoming. I don’t recall Sheepstealer being there at the time…maybe he was feeding elsewhere in the Crownlands. I’d know if I’d seen him before, I think.”
“Sheepstealer is very…unique in appearance.”
You smile at the memory of Grandsire calling him hideous, then go somber when you remember he’s dead. “Grey Ghost was sweet, though. He didn’t attempt to burn me, he just flew away.”
“You’ve tried all of those dragons?” Now Jace seems genuinely intrigued. “Just…one after the other?”
You shrug and swig your wine. Jace gives you a disapproving glance; you put the cup down and begin eating instead. “I wanted a beast for myself. Everyone else had theirs, it seemed inevitable that I would find mine if I searched long enough. I even approached the Cannibal.”
“The Cannibal.” Jace shakes his head and forks sailfish into his mouth; it’s the first bite he’s taken tonight. “You were desperate. Or stupid.”
You smirk. “Or both.”
“What color are his flames? Green, like his eyes?”
“No,” you say softly, remembering the massive black dragon covered in spines like the stalagmites of a cave. “No, the Cannibal’s dragonfire is red.”
“Do you think yourself to be…” Jace gestures vaguely with his fork. “Lacking in some way? Less capable than Helaena or your brothers?”
This is a rude question. “It doesn’t matter what I think. I must be inadequate, or I would have a dragon.”
Jace seems to contemplate this as he eats.
“Why do you ask?” you provoke him, before recalling you’re supposed to be winning his affection, if such a thing is possible, and you very much doubt it. “Are you concerned I’ll pass this fault on to my children?”
“Well, it’s an interest of mine,” Jace says. “Locating dragonriders. What makes someone alluring to the beasts, as well as what doesn’t. This war will be won by dragons, I’m sure each side aspires to have more of them.”
You study him, taking nibbles of your sailfish. Recruiting dragonriders outside of the immediate family is not something Aemond would ever consider; he would not trust them, he would view them as supplanters of the natural order. But a bastard himself… “Was it your idea to find someone to ride Sheepstealer?”
Jace grins, cagey and teasing. He spears green beans with his fork. “I’m not going to tell you that.”
Because I can’t be trusted with the Blacks’ strategies. Just with birthing their heirs. “I didn’t know you had ideas.”
“Yes, well, Mother and Daemon try very hard not to notice them.” He points to your braid with his knife. “Do you wear your hair like that because of Visenya?”
You touch it self-consciously. You’re surprised he noticed. “Yes.”
“She married her brother,” Jace says, and this sounds like an accusation.
“She was also fearless, and dangerous, and she had a dragon.”
“Unlike you.”
“Right.”
Jace chuckles to himself. Now he is certainly being smug. Somewhere out in the night, Vermax is trailing the ship and will reunite with Jace once you’ve docked at Heart’s Home. You keep listening for Vhagar, imagining that Aemond will sense it as you sail near where he and Criston are tending to Aegon at Rook’s Rest, and he will fly to you and torch this ship and bring you home like he’s always promised. But perhaps Aemond is forgetting you. Perhaps he resents that you cannot help him win the war; perhaps he is beginning to hate you. Oblivious, Jace eats his sailfish.
“I had a bat named Sailfish,” you say.
Jace is puzzled. “A bat? Like…?” He makes flapping motions with his hands.
You smile and nod. “I kept bats.”
“Why?”
“Because I enjoyed them,” you say, and again you must stop yourself from mentioning Aemond. He cared for them because I did. “They horrified most people, but the children thought they were adorable. I’d teach them how to hold the bats and feed them bugs and fruit, and Jaehaerys couldn’t stop laughing when they licked honey off his fingers…” Then you shudder and go quiet, because you cannot think of Jaehaerys without seeing his hemorrhaging, headless body in Aegon’s arms.
Jace frowns down at the table. The wooden beams of the ship groan; the candlelight flickers. “Just as Mother and Daemon do not often heed my suggestions,” he says carefully after a while. “They do not share many of their plans with me. I knew nothing of what my stepfather arranged to happen that night. And if I had known, I would not have allowed it.”
I don’t believe you can control Daemon at all, you think. But instead you reply hoarsely: “I’m glad you recognize it for the atrocity that it was.”
“I know I’ve spoken harshly in the past. But if you are truly to be my wife, I wish for us to be in harmony as much as possible. I hope you feel the same way.”
“I do.” You don’t have much of a choice. How can you sleep with a man who hates you, who you hate in equal measure? “And Jace…I didn’t know what was going to happen to Luke or Baela. I had no part in either of their deaths.”
“I can’t…” His voice breaks; he swipes at his dark glistening eyes, like flecks of onyx. “I can’t talk about them.”
You are alarmed. “Jace—”
“Goodnight,” he says as he leaves, already halfway across the room.
~~~~~~~~~~
The first time you’re together—at your vanity, late for dinner—Aemond doesn’t try to put his fingers inside you, and he doesn’t the second time either, or the third, or even the fourth. And this is just fine as far as you’re concerned, because the way Mother has mentioned the duty of a wife implies that there is a great deal of sacrifice involved for the woman, discomfort, pain, even harm, and what you have with Aemond—despite its many peculiarities—has never been painful, and you don’t want to ruin it. You don’t want to find out what other women mean when they talk about boredom and dread and blood.
Then one day you are in the garden, and you and Helaena are trying to teach the children how to play the game with the animal pieces, but they must not be quite old enough because they won’t listen. Jaehaera pokes Jaehaerys with Helaena’s yellow butterfly, Maelor chomps indifferently on Daeron’s purple shadowcat. You and Helaena laugh and give up the attempt as maids swoop in to corral the children.
“We’ll try again in a few months,” you say. “Perhaps they’ll be more tame by then.”
Helaena begins to gather up the game pieces. “We should ask Aegon to carve new animals for the children. Jaehaerys likes seals…” Then her hands go still and she stares at someone who’s standing behind you.
Before you can turn, Aemond leans down to where you’re kneeling on the cobblestones, grabs your braid, and wraps it around his fist. “Follow me,” he whispers into your ear.
“Why? Where?”
“Follow me,” he says again, more forcefully now. “I’m not asking.” Then he releases you with a rough shove and walks away.
You rise from the cobblestones and go after him, weaving through the paths of the garden, fountains trickling and flowers blooming and bees droning in the air. Aemond glances back to make sure you’re in pursuit, then disappears into an arbor grown over with roses, a tunnel of red blossoms and snagging thorns. Aemond sits on a stone bench that is draped in shadows and hidden from view; no one will see you unless they enter the tunnel. You can hear the distant sound of the ocean waves, and gulls and bluejays and the red-tailed hawks the noblemen hunt with. You take a seat beside Aemond, and immediately he lifts your legs so they rest across his lap, reaches beneath the hem of your maroon gown with his right hand, skims his way up the inside of your thigh as you pretend to fight him, all the while smiling and needing him closer, all your blood and muscles screaming for him, your bones aching like fractures that must be set.
“Look at me,” Aemond commands, catching your jaw in his left hand and holding you still, the transparent blue of his eye fixed on your face, where he reads every line and movement like a dead language, like the High Valyrian almost no one left can understand. “I want to know if I’m hurting you.”
Beneath your gown, his fingers are stroking you, waiting for you to be wet and relaxed enough, parting your lips.
“Are you afraid?” Aemond asks.
“No.” Maybe you should be, but you aren’t.
There is an unfamiliar fullness, strange but not unpleasant, and then when Aemond’s fingers begin to move inside you, you moan softly and close your eyes, breaking the spell. He lets go of your jaw and his palm shifts to cradle the side of your face, to bring you in closer, to hold you against him. And now you know that when he finally takes you, as a husband does a wife, it will be painless; and it will never be something you warn your silver-haired children about with dark resignation in your voice.
“What if they won’t let us marry?” you whisper against the warmth of his throat, dreading this more than anything. You don’t know that Targaryens and their dragons will soon be dying. “What if they send me away to wed some lord in the Reach or the Westerlands or the Vale?”
“Then I’ll find you,” Aemond says. “And I’ll burn down his castle, and I’ll bring you home.”
“You’re a monster,” you purr; but there’s a grin on your lips as he kisses you, something scalding and primordial like magma flowing beneath the earth.
~~~~~~~~~~
Heart’s Home is a small grey castle in a vast grey world, the shadows of mountains filling the horizon, the sky overcast and bleak and the air tasting like metal. The last time you were in the Vale was as a girl, when Aemond pushed you into a frigid stream and you caught a chill that almost killed you, and he never apologized but he slept on your floor like a dog so he could be there to climb into bed and hold you when you shivered, and surely that is a greater sort of repentance than two vanishingly small words that anyone could say and perhaps not even mean.
You and Jace disembark from Alyn of Hull’s ship on the banks of where an inland river meets the saltwater of the Narrow Sea. Outside the castle walls, Heart’s Home has a stable and a sizable field, surely green and fertile in the summer, that is surrounded on three sides by a thick forest of coniferous trees. Cawing ravens perch on the branches; a hunting party emerges from the pines accompanied by braying hounds and carrying corpses of foxes to be skinned. You are greeted warmly by Lord Leowyn Corbray—who is tall and ancient, over seventy years old—and his wife Lady Carolei, around fifty and very round, with dark hair and pale skin that the harsh mountain wind rubs pink. While her husband fawns over Jace—“We were so honored by the queen’s request,” “We will ensure that your every need is attended to, Prince Jacaerys”—Lady Carolei Corbray watches you with an amused little smile, as if there are many questions she is impatient to ask you. Then you and your betrothed are ushered into the castle and served mutton pie full of gravy and vegetables, dark bread slathered with butter, blackberry oatcakes for dessert. You drink too much wine, because you know what will happen next. Jace does not reprove you this time; he’s drinking a good amount of ale himself.
The people of the Vale worship the Seven, and for all you know Jace does too, because there is no mention of a Valyrian wedding with fire and blood. Instead you exchange your vows in a tiny sept with plain glass windows and cold slate stones. A weathered, bony septon presides over the ceremony, and Lord Corbray stands in for your dead father. Even if Viserys was still alive, he wouldn’t feel like much less of a stranger. You are covered with a maiden’s cloak of your house—Lady Corbray announces proudly that it was sewn especially for this occasion—but it’s wrong, because they’ve used the old black and red sigil of House Targaryen rather than Aegon’s banner, a golden dragon on a green background. But you suppose it’s fitting because Jace’s cloak isn’t right either, as it depicts the seahorse of House Velaryon rather than the tri-colored flag of House Strong.
At the septon’s direction, Lord Corbray removes your cloak from your shoulders and Jace covers you with his own. And once you’ve exchanged the requisite words and Jace kisses you—him swift and uneasy, you trying not to flinch away—you realize that this is the first time you can remember him touching you. On the journey northward, Jace would sometimes find you pacing the ship’s deck and ask you silted, shallow questions: What kind of weather do you like best? What are your favorite desserts? Do you prefer swimming or horseback riding? What colors do you favor? Your nightly ritual was trying not to discuss your murdered relatives over dinner.
You are put to bed in a grand chamber at the top of one of the castle’s towers. There is a fireplace where logs snap and hiss, and a rug made of a shadowcat’s pelt; a chandelier of lit candles hangs from the ceiling. Through the window, you can see a silvery full moon obscured by clouds. You and Jace—freshly bathed and wearing loose, cotton nightclothes—wait in the quiet once your hosts have left, the blankets pulled up to your waists. All the bedlinens are white, you realize; you don’t think this is by accident.
They want to know if I’m truly a maiden. They want to know if I bleed.
You have no idea if you will or not. Nothing that Aemond has ever done to you has resulted in blood.
I don’t want it to hurt, you think with abrupt panic. You look around for a jar of oil, olive or rose or peppermint, something to help him enter you. You open the drawers of your nightstand and are disappointed to find them empty.
“What are you doing?” Jace asks.
“Nothing.” You can’t explain without revealing you know more than a virgin should.
Jace turns to you. “You really haven’t done this before?”
Your nervousness must be evident. Surely no whore who had already been defiled by her monstrous brother would be sitting here wringing her trembling hands. “No.”
“Okay.” Jace takes a deep breath. He seems resolved to be brave for both of you; that is a husband’s burden, after all. “I haven’t either.”
“But you’ve…I mean, you’re a man, it’s different for you. You have experience of some sort, I assume…?” With Baela? With anyone?
Jace blushes and can’t meet your eyes. “I’m not above temptation. We kissed a few times.”
This is not reassuring. “Do you think you’ll be able to…? With me?” The daughter and sister of enemies?
He nods and smiles faintly. “Oh yeah, I think it’ll all work as it should.” Then he looks at you, dark eyes, dark curls, not ugly but not who you’ve ever imagined you would give yourself to. His gaze settles on your braid. “Here,” he says, and then he gently begins to unravel it.
You aren’t sure what to do. You’re not going to hit Jace, or fight him, or shove him or grab him or scratch him, and so you don’t know where you should put your hands. Once your hair is loose, you sink down to the soft feather mattress until you are lying flat on your back. Jace yanks off his shirt and tosses it to the floor, then he leans towards you, gesturing to your nightgown.
“Is it okay if I…?”
“Sure,” you say, and help him pull it off you. Even beneath the blankets, your bare skin feels the chill of the night air, and with the apprehension and fear there is something else too, a longing, a craving that has gone unsatiated. It’s crude to think, but it’s true: you’re used to being fed, and you haven’t been since Aemond went away.
Unexpectedly, Jace’s eyes don’t go to your breasts or lower; instead, they catch on the scar that cuts down from your left collarbone. He touches it with careful, weightless fingerprints. His voice is tender. “What happened here?”
“An assassin’s blade,” you say. “The night Jaehaerys died.”
“I’m sorry,” he whispers. Here—in bed, in the firelight—he is not Rhaenyra’s eldest son and someone you are supposed to hate, someone who is a threat to your life, someone who once played a part in Aemond losing his eye. Here Jace is just a man, and you are naked, and beneath the blankets he is taking off his cotton trousers and then positioning himself between your legs. You are a little wet already, you can feel it, but you know you need more, you know he needs to make you ready with his fingers and his mouth, but Jace isn’t aware of this and you can’t tell him.
You gasp as he starts to push himself inside you, overwhelming burning pressure. “Jace, I’m afraid.”
He stops and looks down at you with seeking, sympathetic eyes. His skin is flushed, his breathing quick. If you could read his face, you’d think it says: What do you want me to do? I’ll do anything. “We can stop.”
“No, just…just please go slowly, okay? Please don’t hurt me.” No more than you have to.
“I don’t want to hurt you,” he murmurs, and then—perhaps because he doesn’t know what else to do—he kisses you, and at first it is formal and unnatural like it was in the sept, but then Jace’s lips begin to move with yours and the kiss glows warm like embers. Your fingers go to his hair—not a Targaryen’s, a Strong’s—and tangle in his curls. His hands explore your breasts, grazing and circling your nipples with his fingertips. You wrap your legs around Jace as his tongue darts into your mouth, wanting this, maybe even wanting him.
Jace thrusts into you, and there is a moment of blinding pain that makes you cry out; and for everything that has been said about Aemond—a monster, a murderer, violent and arrogant and wicked—nothing he has ever done to you has hurt like this. Immediately, Jace moves to pull away, but you stop him. “Don’t.”
He shakes his head. “But you’re hurt—”
You hold his face in your hands to make him listen. “I’m alright, I promise. Just wait here, just give me a moment.”
“Okay,” Jace sighs into your throat that’s damp with perspiration. He kisses you there, tasting your salt, fear that has turned to lust. “Okay, okay…”
Already the pain is fading, and your muscles are relaxing, and you are slick with wetness to ease the razored friction. And it’s nothing like the way Aemond knew how to touch you—you are nowhere near a climax—but still, there is something pleasurable about it, there is something nice about being tangled up with a man this way again.
“Go on,” you tell Jace; and he rests his forehead against yours as he thrusts into you, very slowly, and he’s shaking all over, and between breathless kisses he is moaning, in shock that a feeling this good exists, in mindless ecstasy, and then he spills himself inside you and collapses onto your chest, still kissing you, thanking you, asking if you’re alright. Before you can answer, he throws back the blankets and examines the sheets. When you look down, you can see that between your legs is a stain of pale pink, a miniscule amount of blood.
Is that all? you think, relieved. It wasn’t so bad. It wasn’t so good either, but it was tolerable. And it will get better.
“No, no, no,” Jace murmurs, kissing the inside of your thigh. He is distressed, he is repentant. “I wounded you. I’m so sorry.”
“I’ll be alright, Jace,” you say, rather amused.
He crawls back to you and lies down beside you on the bed. He is struggling to keep his eyes open. “You weren’t lying. You’ve never done that before.”
“No.”
“I won’t hurt you again.” He kisses your cheek. “My wife. My princess.” And then he rests his head on his pillow and within a minute he is snoring softly.
“My prince,” you whisper, trying it out. It doesn’t feel right yet, but maybe one day it will. You have to clean yourself off; Jace doesn’t know this about women, but you do. You climb out of bed, and Jace stirs as you leave.
“I love you,” he says, like it’s a reflex he’s repeated a thousand times, like it takes no thought at all. You stare bewildered at him. Jace’s eyes are still closed. And you think of Aemond—suddenly, with great clarity, as Jace sleeps in your shared bed—and you will yourself to be able to see where is and what he’s thinking. But there is nothing: only silence and firelight and the full moon hovering in the overcast, indigo sky outside.
Is he thinking of me? Does he feel lost too?
You have the maids draw a hot bath and you wash it all away, the sweat and the blood and the wetness and Jace’s seed that might give you a child with the unruly dark hair of the Strongs, and still you cannot stop thinking of Aemond.
Did he love me then? Does he love me now?
Back in your bedchamber, you gaze into the flames of the fireplace and try to remember the sound of Aemond’s voice, but you can’t. It keeps bleeding into the words of other people: Aegon, Daeron, Maelor, Jace.
#aemond targaryen x reader#aemond targaryen#aemond x you#aemond x y/n#aemond x reader#aemond targaryen x you#jace x you#jace x reader#jace velaryon x reader#jace velaryon x you#jacaerys x reader#jacaerys x you#jacaerys velaryon
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“ PREY ” — choi seungcheol
pairing — werewolf!seungcheol x f!reader
summary — you are but prey to him.
wc — 2.2k
warnings — nsfw content. minors dni. smut, cunnilingus, predator/prey, images of gore and death (it’s all metaphorical), religious imagery/references (probably sacrilege oops), this is NOT omegaverse
author’s note — howling by xg on repeat recently. sorry if this isn’t what u were expecting but all my writing inspiration comes from angela carter
this fic is part of MONSTER: a hip hop unit series.
Your legs and lungs burn with the heat of a thousand fires.
You wonder how long it’s been since you started running. Was it minutes or hours? You don’t know. All that you do know is that every second that passes is a second closer to your death. It’s certain that you won’t make it out alive—it won’t let you—yet that is what makes you run faster, push yourself harder, your lungs reaching their absolute limit to provide you with the oxygen to keep going.
There’s a crunch of leaves in the distance, to your left. It’s not behind you. It never was.
Slowly, the sound of four separate steps hitting the earth grows closer and closer. You can only vaguely hear it over the sound of your heart struggling to pump blood through your body.
A shriek rips itself from your throat. It cuts through the air as you’re thrown to the ground like you’re nothing more than a doll. Sharp pain slams through your body. The ground beneath you spins. Bile rises to your throat.
Crying for help is futile. Even if you had the strength to yell, only the trees would hear your pleas.
When you open your eyes that you hadn’t realised you screwed shut, you’re face to face with death. Daggers for teeth inside of a snarling, drool-dripping snout; yellow eyes like the moon had fallen from the abyss above and nestled into this beast; pointy ears that made the devil’s silhouette appear when your vision grew blurry.
The last dregs of adrenaline in your body are what allow you to try and crawl away, to scramble like a newborn fawn on its unused legs. You don’t make it two feet before you’re dragged backwards through branches and dirt.
You’re not sure what makes you fight, but you do. You struggle despite the way his hands snake around your limbs like thorny vines, and every second that you keep struggling your skin stings more and more, his hold tightening until you think he’ll snap your bones.
The wolf keeps you pinned to the forest floor, revelling in the pitiful sounds of your fear. His claws find a home in your flesh, but it is still not as agonising as the anticipation—all you want is for him to get it over with; to shred your chest apart and rip your beating, bleeding heart from its seams.
At its core, however, a werewolf is a monster. It is terrifying, not just because it is hideous, but because it is also cruel. It thrives off of your fear. You’re going to die—you know that. He knows that too, so he holds your frail little life in the palm of his hands and dangles it in your face.
Your dress becomes tatters and scraps the moment the wolf’s claws come to touch it, but he leaves your skin mostly unscathed. Mostly.
His low growl grows louder in your ear until your skin is warm with his breath. It turns to a terrible rumble, deep and sadistic, one that reverberates through even your own chest, one that makes you cower, and suddenly you’re nothing but a small rabbit. It digs deep into your brain, finds every nook that you’ve stowed your traumas away into and drags them out until you’re no longer moving. No longer breathing.
The wolf stands and watches tears leave salty trails down your face as they dry, only to be replaced again by more.
You must look pathetic the way you try to scamper away again, persistent even when you’ve lost the will to persist. You are human though—to grasp onto every last fibre of hope of staying alive is innate.
Quickly the wolf grows bored by your ‘escape’ attempts. In one sudden movement he plucks you off the ground and tosses you over his thick shoulder.
“P-please… Let me go,” you sob as thickets of trees continuously pass by you. You hear a clock ticking in your head and it lines up with the footsteps of the beast that holds you captive. “Where are you taking me?”
Your voice is small, probably but a squeak in the wolf’s ear. Even if he hears you, he does not show it. Only trudges on to the slaughterhouse.
Your consciousness comes and goes as fatigue settles in to replace adrenaline. As you hang limp, your body tries to put itself back together, your muscles and bones pulsing painfully from being overexerted.
A door creaks open, then slams. Your eyes flicker open, you’re pulled back to reality. You don’t even have time to come to your senses before you’re bouncing upon a mattress.
With a groan, you push yourself to sit up, cradling your spinning head as you glance around at the wood panelled walls, the two square windows on either side of the door, and the old dining chair in one corner that’s next to a wood burning stove.
The wolf approaches and this time you look directly into his eyes that glow in the dark of the cabin.
He bares his teeth, but you no longer cower.
He climbs over you, prowls along your body, and you’re swallowed by his shadow again as he pins you beneath him.
“What big teeth you have,” you sigh, reaching up to his snout, your hand the size of a child’s next to him.
He gives a thundering growl again, spit flying as his jaws circle your neck. It makes you grimace.
“Okay, okay, can you turn back now? It’s hard to look at you.”
Your words work like some sort of spell. He steps back into the darkness of the cabin, and in an instant the massive creature starts to shift before your very eyes. The place begins to fill with a grotesque cacophony of cracking bones as they shift to fit a smaller body, and now it is his turn to scream in agony. The old floorboards groan as he falls to his knees, as his thick fur vanishes into pale flesh, as claws retract into fingernails.
As the monster dies, your lover is left.
Handsome, human, features replace animal ones, and Seungcheol looks at you so fondly that it’s jarring. Even though he glistens with sweat and he’s gasping for breath and his pupils are blown out and wild, he sags with relief at the sight of you, a contrast so stark to before.
He’s on his knees at the edge of the bed you’re perched on before you can even speak.
“Did I hurt you?” is the first thing he asks, his voice scratchy like it’s his first time speaking. He’s cautious as he reaches for you to inspect your limbs, finding your skin littered with bruises and scratch marks that make his heart clench.
“Well, a little, yeah,” you say, and you laugh, and Seungcheol is partially comforted by your nonchalance as well as the fact that it was you who had wanted to play the part of the little hare; his prey. His eyes had bulged out of his head when you proposed your masochistic idea for a Friday night; a ‘bonding’ activity that would be fun for both of you.
It took a while before he was convinced. He warned you that he couldn’t guarantee your full safety once he was turned. You insisted you knew what you were in for.
“I’m so sorry, baby,” he whispers into your skin before he kisses your bruised wrists, then moves down so he can kiss your grazed knees too.
“There’s a way you can make it up to me, you know,” you tell him, your voice charged with something suggestive, something that Seungcheol can pick up on immediately. Still, he presses you.
“And what’s that, my darling?”
“You can… eat me.”
Seungcheol takes a deep breath, rising up off the floor so that he can lean over your body. He stares into your eyes and this time it’s much, much softer, and yet there’s a glint in them, a flash of hunger, almost like the one the wolf had in his eyes.
“You want that?” he asks.
“Mhm,” you say, and your voice is but a whisper, as though you aren’t in the middle of nowhere, surrounded by miles of trees, as though all that will hear your voice is not birds and wild creatures—and your lover, of course. “Make it up to me.”
His gaze clouds over as his teeth sink into his bottom lip. Then he steals your breath from you once more, pressing his lips against yours, and it’s searing. Perhaps it’s the adrenaline that’s still flowing through both of you, that’s making you move with vigour. Perhaps it’s Seungcheol’s guilt, or your fiery, aching need. Perhaps it’s all of that all at once.
His tongue shoves past your lips, makes its way against your own tongue. Your teeth clash and your noses rub together, and then Seungcheol breaks the kiss. It’s only to attack your neck in a slew of bites, teeth grazing over your skin until a mark blooms there.
His hands trace along your body, your skin scorching beneath the remains of fabric that you’re still clad in.
“Cheol, my dress,” you sigh, tugging at his hair. “Want it off.”
Without another word, Seungcheol halts his assault on your neck, takes two handfuls of the remnants of your sundress and riiip!—and you know the fabric was no more than paper to him, but you’re only a girl and his strength never fails to leave you so flustered that your entire body grows scorching hot.
“And this?” he says, warm hands cupping your bra-covered chest. You moan when he squeezes them, then his fingers start to toy with the straps, but he makes no move to pull them down your arms.
“Take it off, please,” you say, pushing yourself up on your elbows. Seungcheol grabs your arm as you reach behind you before you can find the clasp.
“Look,” he says, and a second later your bra faces the same fate as your dress—a shredded heap upon the floor.
With your tits exposed, Seungcheol can’t help but latch onto one immediately. His mouth is so warm around your nipple, and one of his hands is squeezing it while he sucks, and his other hand is playing with your other one, pinching and tugging, and you think you just might explode.
He leaves the peaks of your tits puffy and spit-soaked, and only then is Seungcheol satisfied enough to leave your chest alone and put his hand between your thighs instead.
“What about these?” he asks, pressing his fingers to your clothed cunt. You jolt when he does, because you knew you were wet, but you didn’t realise you had soaked through the fabric already.
“O-off, God, please,” is your reply, hands grabbing at him, urging him, egging him on.
He’s on his knees again, gazing up at you as he disappears between your thighs. His nose nudges against your cunt through the wet fabric, and he inhales hard until his eyes are rolling and there’s drool pooling in his mouth.
“Fuckin’ delicious,” he grumbles, licking his lips while he tears your panties in half. You’re still reeling from watching him breathe in your scent and fuck, now his tongue is on your pussy.
A shaky moan of his name leaves your mouth as he licks at every part of you, laps up your dripping arousal like he’s starving for it—he is. But finally tasting you does not bring him one step closer to satiation. It drags him further and further away from it until he’s addicted to chasing it, until he will never get enough.
When Seungcheol’s lips seal over your clit and suck, he sends your legs into tremors, sends stars dancing in your vision, sends you into heaven. You grab at his hair, at the sheets; do anything you can do to hold on to your sanity as Seungcheol devours you.
The harsh, indulgent dance of his tongue over your cunt makes you cry his name. You say it like you’re praying. You beg; beg for mercy, but also for more. It’s all too much, but it’s not enough. It’s heaven and hell how he works his mouth against you, clawless fingertips still sinking into your skin as he keeps your hips pinned to the mattress, keeps you splayed out all for him on a silver platter.
Seungcheol licks and slurps and laps at your cunt until you’re dripping from his lips. He is gluttony, ravishing you even when he cannot breathe because his mouth and nose are buried in your pussy. Even when he is full, he wants more of you, blessed and cursed with eternal starvation. But you are the body and the blood. You are the Lamb, and eating you will atone his sins and he will be forgiven.
So he tears you open; with his mouth he rips you apart at your seams until finally you come undone. Even then, he feasts on your remains as you wail and writhe, as sin burns through you, so heavenly that it must be holy. Even then, he eats, and eats, and eats you up.
thank u for reading! reblogs and feedback are highly appreciated <3
#svthub#thediamondlifenetwork#scoups x reader#scoups smut#scoups x you#seventeen smut#svt smut#choi seungcheol x reader#choi seungcheol smut#scoups fanfic#choi seungcheol imagines#[୨୧] — starring: seungcheol
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altars for kemetic/egyptian gods
hi yall, another purely based in UPG, new agey post! historically, deity offerings for the ancient egyptians often took the form of art/sculpture/hymns, incense (like frankincense or myrrh), or offerings of food (especially meat and bread) and drink (wine/ale, mostly). dialogue with the gods was often facilitated through the pharaohs or funerary rites, but your average person had access to daily magic and regular temples as well.
RA
Colors: yellow, orange, red for the sun
Offerings: eye of ra, dates, figs, grapes, apricots, sunflowers, morning glories, chocolate, pastries, orange juice, honey
Crystals: sunstone, yellow/red jasper, citrine, carnelian, honey calcite, angelite, kyanite
Animals: falcon
SHU
Colors: white, blue for the air/sky
Offerings: feathers (especially ostrich), sandalwood, gardenia, anise, paper fans, cornflower
Crystals: white/clear quartz, angelite, selenite, blue calcite, fluorite, blue lace agate
Animals: lion, ostrich
TEFNUT
Colors: white, blue for water
Offerings: sea salt, reeds, shells, water, coral, water (especially dew), lotus root/flower
Crystals: blue calcite, sodalite, lapis lazuli, amethyst, larimar, ocean/blue lace agate, aquamarine
Animals: lioness
NUT
Colors: blue, black for night. white for stars
Offerings: amber, sandalwood, sycamore, moonflowers, morning glories, milk
Crystals: lapis lazuli, star jasper, azurite, obsidian, smokey quartz, black tourmaline, labradorite, sodalite, moonstone (especially black)
Animals: boar, cow, sow
GEB
Colors: green, brown for earth. black for the underworld
Offerings: grain, beans, yarrow, cinnamon, coffee, egg shells, foliage, dirt, rocks, snake shed, milk
Crystals: jasper (various types), aventurine, moss/tree agate, unakite, obsidian, jade, malachite
Animals: snake, goose, rabbit, bull
OSIRIS
Colors: green for renewal, black for death, white for rebirth
Offerings: bandages, dark chocolate, dried fruit (especially oranges or dates), dark chocolate, coffee, cedar, vetiver, bones
Crystals: lapis lazuli, moss agate, jasper (various types), malachite, obsidian, smokey quartz, pyrite, jade, howlite, star jasper (for his astral form)
Animals: heron, ram, cow
ISIS
Colors: white, grey for the moon. blue, black for the night. green for life and resurrection.
Offerings: the tyet symbol, cow horn, milk, sycamore, feathers, dried fruit (such as raisins or dates), pomegranates, nuts, pastries
Crystals: star jasper, moonstone, rose quartz, amethyst, fluorite, bloodstone, red jasper, carnelian, labradorite, aventurine
Animals: birds (especially a kite hawk or vulture), cow, cat, scorpion, sow
HORUS
Colors: blue, purple for insight and intuition. white and red for pharoahship.
Offerings: eye of horus, weaponry/iron, lotus flower/root, feathers (especially hawk or falcon), yarrow, chocolate
Crystals: malachite, aventurine, pyrite, amethyst, lapis lazuli, jasper (various), howlite, sunstone, aquamarine, labradorite, hematite
Animals: falcon
NEPHTHYS
Colors: black for darkness and funerary rites
Offerings: beer, linen, feathers (especially of a crow or vulture), bones, coffee, nuts, milk
Crystals: obsidian, smokey quartz, black moonstone (because of association with Isis), black tourmaline, red jasper, bloodstone
Animals: vulture, crow
SET
Colors: red, black for chaos and storms
Offerings: lettuce, sand, alcohol, dragon's blood, patchouli, yarrow, vetiver, charcoal, dark chocolate, black pepper
Crystals: red jasper, black tourmaline, howlite, obsidian, labradorite, sodalite, bloodstone, malachite, pyrite
Animals: the set animal (which resembles a canine, giraffe, and aardvark), donkey
THOTH
Colors: grey, blue for intuition/intelligence. white for the moon
Offerings: quill, ink, pieces of writing/books, feathers, rosemary, citrus, sage, moon water, lavender, nuts
Crystals: amethyst, lapis lazuli, malachite, moonstone, selenite, howlite, angelite, sodalite, fluorite
Animals: ibis, baboon
ANUBIS
Colors: black, grey for funerary rites/death
Offerings: bones, ash, charcoal, red/black peppercorns, marigold (associated with the dead), linen, yarrow
Crystals: hematite, obsidian, black tourmaline, howlite, jasper (various, but especially red), smokey/rutilated quartz, bloodstone
Animals: canines, especially a jackal
BASTET
Colors: white, red for pharaohship
Offerings: ointments/perfumes of most types, cedar, anything cat related, rosemary, black salt
Crystals: tiger's eye, cat's eye quartz, bloodstone, red jasper, black tourmaline, howlite, milky/smokey quartz, pyrite, carnelian
Animals: lioness, cat
SEKHMET
Colors: red for war. grey for justice
Offerings: sand (especially red), scales of justice, iron, cypress, red pepper, black salt
Crystals: bloodstone, red jasper, carnelian, garnet, ruby kyanite, jade, smokey/clear, hematite
Animals: lioness
HATHOR
Colors: pink, red for love/sexuality
Offerings: dancing, dried fruits (especially figs/dates), pomegranates, sycamore, milk, honey, pastries
Crystals: rose quartz, amethyst, citrine, carnelian, fluorite, jade, aquamarine, garnet/ruby
Animals: cow, lioness, cobra
KHONSU
Colors: white, grey for the moon. blue, black for the night.
Offerings: lavender, sage, mugwort, dried fruit, moon shaped items, moon flower, ash
Crystals: moonstone, selenite, sodalite, obsidian, black tourmaline, smokey/milky quartz, jasper (various), blue lace agate, lapis lazuli
Animals: falcon
#pagan#paganism#polytheist#witchblr#witchcraft#polytheism#witch#magic#magick#divination#kemetic#kemetism#egyptian gods#ancient egypt#egyptian mythology#deities#deity work#deity worship#deity#altars#osiris#isis goddess#horus#anubis#bastet#bast
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