#bods polls

[nobodysdaydreams]

This poll got me thinking:

Tumblr users, which do you think would be WORSE if you were an irl celebrity with an anonymous tumblr?

Option 1: Someone in your fandom gives you anon hate and blocks you on tumblr because they consider your content cringe/problematic/annoying BUT they also consider themselves the biggest fan of irl you, and they are constantly making posts about how cool you are, posting fan edits of you, defending irl you aggressively against your haters, and talking about how they desperately wish you had a tumblr so you could interact with fans (little do they know).

Option 2: You have a mutual you consider a friend, and you constantly talk about fandom stuff together. However, they hate irl you. They mention in DM's about how much they really can't stand irl you and make posts on tumblr saying they consider irl you to be “not that attractive, kinda problematic, weird, annoying, out of touch, untalented, etc.” and state that they really don’t get the hype around irl you (but they have no clue they’re talking about you to you and still maintain that you’re one of their favorite mutuals and a great person).

[ofwraithsandwords]

Alright, I have decided to consult the Halsil (Halsin Council):

[gentle-giant-swag]

MOST FUCKABLE GENTLE GIANT

GRAND FINALS

Yes we skipped everything and went directly to the finals because we know which two would get to the finals okay

[jazzzzzzhands]

I've been playing dress-up with Wally this whole time, so now it's Eddie's turn! I'm turning this into a series! A "dress-up" session, to use as an excuse to draw the rest of the neighbors!

[found-family-tournament]

Found Family Tournament Round 1 Part 18 Group 89

Propaganda and further pictures under the cut

The Graveyard: Nobody 'Bod' Owens, Liza Hempstock, Silas, Mr and Mrs Owens, Miss Lupescu

Submissions are still open!

The Graveyard:

Sorry, I got no propaganda for them yet :(

Ingo, Emmet, Elesa, Drayden & Iris:

Okay so I don't know if this counts since Ingo and Emmet are siblings but they adopted Elesa as their sister and (in my headcanon) Drayden is Ingo and Emmet's uncle who adopted Iris, so she's kinda like their cousin bxbxbx I don't know if this makes any sense but I love them

[asbestieos]

astamitsu r going to thw aquarium w pookies

[rakurairagnarok]

Heres the poll result!!! Please enjoy!! My commissions are still open!

Summer Bod

Derek sighed. It was a hot summer day, and he was sweating bullets. His classmates had invited him to the beach. Not that he was particularly close to any of them, but he couldn't pass up on a trip to the beach. He didn't feel like being left out like the rest of the year. They had told him to leave his swimsuit at home; Greg's father allegedly had extra pairs from his store, and he had to lose them so Greg had told him he would give them to his classmates. Once Derek arrived though he figured it was set up. The only pair they had extra was a large pink pair, which was way to big. Derek turned red.

"These were the only ones left Derek, we're soooo sorry." One of the guys snickered.

"They do suit you though, such a girly color...oh right you're a guy." One of the girls grinned at her own remark.

Derek took a deep breath and grabbed the shorts. He was not gonna let them bully him out of this day. He was gonna man up and show them. He walked to the changing rooms, tossing the shorts on the side, and started to undress.

He pulled the shorts over his skinny legs and looked at himself in the mirror. His scrawny body had caused him to be bullied and picked on for most of his highschool life. Derek pushed his big glasses up his nose and sighed. "I wish I wasn't so powerless."

As soon as those words left his mouth, the shorts started to heat up, and Derek froze. Not voluntarily, his body litterally wouldn't move an inch.

"What the hell?" Derek frowned as he tried his hardest to get his body to listen to his commands, to no avail. A sudden cramping in his legs caused him to stop trying, as he cried out in pain. He looked down and saw his calves contracting, as if he had been working his legs constantly. Curiously, as they relaxed, his calves seemed to have grown slightly. Before Derek could look more closely however, they cramped up again. This time, his quads flared up as well. This continued, untill his whole body seemed to be on fire. Derek looked, through the tears in his eyes, at the mirror and saw his whole body pulsate. After about a minute he actually saw proof of his muscles growing.

His abdominal muscles, which he had never trained, started to push out, leaving a decent sixpack behind. The cramps started to focus more on his legs again, as his quads started to thicken tremendously. The shorts that were almost hanging from his fragile frame were quickly straining to contain his thickening legs. His calves and feet also grew, and an extra harsh cramp on his right leg caused an intricate tattoo to form all over his calve.

Panting from the pain, Derek didn't notice his legs were finally unfrozen. They still had a mind of their own, flexing the large muscles, and even jiggling the bubble butt he had gained.

The cramps moved up to his torso, his flat chest quickly pushing out into thick strong pectorals. His back widened, while his waist shrunk slightly, giving him an improved widened posture. Another rough cramp just above his groin introduced his body to another new tattoo, spelling 'Willpower' in an elegant font. His side screamed in pain as another intricate tattoo was scratched into his skin.

Just like his legs, his whole torso began to flex; his pecs were bouncing and his tight abs were striking every pose imaginable. His obliques were spreading, almost like wings.

His arms were next in line. It began in his shoulders, which were quickly rounding into large muscular orbs. His posture widened even more, making Derek almost twice as wide as he once was. His bisceps and triceps were blowing up. His former twigs were now almost the size of his head, and his fore arms were not far behind. His hands tightened, years of rough work scraping off layers of soft smooth skin, leaving behind tough and calloused hands.

More seething pain called in more new tattoos, one on his right and a more colourfull on his left.

His arms began to frantically pose in every stereotypical arm pose, flexing his huge bisceps.

The cramps finally moved to his face, completely rearranging his facial structure. His previously boyish face hardened out, giving Derek a hard and strong jaw. His acne dissappeared and in its place grew a thick manly beard.

His nerdy glasses started to morph into an expensive pair of sunglasses, while his equally nerdy haircut got millimetered to a fresh buzzcut. His vision got darker as a baseball cap firmly planted itself on his head.

As the cap tightened, his head began to feel blissfully empty. All his fear, pain and embarrassment drained, leaving behind only arousal, joy and some gym routines. The unnecessary thoughts all dropped down into his steadily growing balls. His underdeveloped rod joined its sweaty globes, and began growing. Inch after inch began sliding down the pink shorts leg.

Derek grinned as he saw his python alive and well. He was happy he was a grower, otherwise not a single pair of pants would be able to contain his massive 12 incher.

He pulled down his shorts to admire his python, not only big in length but also a respectable girth. A clod of pre ran down its length. Derek slowly began to stroke, his balls quickly responding. Before long, thick ropes of cum shot against the mirror, his former life leaving Derek in the most pleasant way possible. Not a trace of the old Derek remained, apart from the bright pink shorts he was wearing, which he couldn't wait to pull off and plant his dick between a cute twinks plump cheeks.

Wanna get a new life? Call Rakurai Inc. Or place an order in my Dms!!

[spicymalepolls]

ROUND 2: POLL #4

ROUND TWO POLLS [HERE]

PROPAGANDA BELOW

🔞 18 + Content Ahead 🔞

Shanks:

I don't think I completely understood the meaning of a DILF until this man showed up. He is physically amazing and I 100% believe he would respect anyone he shares a bunk with. The way he took to Luffy and became his paternal roll model is beautiful. That shows that it's not always about the amount of time you spend with the kid, but the quality of it which is important. He is not a confirmed biological dad, but he is Luffy's (as just stated) and it is a popular theory that he is the father of Makino's child. (plus Uta)

Guys, I want to have his baby--and I don't even know if I want kids.

Image #1

Image #2

Image #3

Image #4 (Rule 34)

Image #5 (Rule 34)

Image #6 (Rule 34)

Dr. Atomic Robo Tesla:

He has an adoptive robot son (spoiler, happens later in the comic) and has a dad bod that given his ability to modify himself has to be a choice at this point. He is 83 (in the present at the start of the comic) but he has pure DILF rather than GILF energies. I mean just look at him.

Image #1

Image #2

Image #3

Image #4

Image #5

Image #6

Image #7 [SPOILER]

Image #8 [SPOILER]

Image #9 [SPOILER]

Image #10 (Rule 34 Paheal)

Image #11 (Rule 34 Paheal)

[doukeshi-kun]

THE OVERCOAT — mostly yapping

i'm still sane about nikolai's ability. i'm gonna ramble here because i know nikolai better than asgr sensei himself LMAO. also, please note that i am mostly using manga panels for references because that's like the most canon. yippee i'm using the normal font.

this is not entirely a definitive theory or anything. i'm horrible in writing essay. i just want to create a conversation regarding his ability :3

first, let's establish that: he can definitely use his ability without his cloak. (why he looks big in suits omg pin me down pls)

which means he is a LIARRR RAAAAA

(technically not because it is true that his cloak is connected. it's just that he doesn't mention about the ability is not restricted only to the cloak)

now, i think his ability is either:

A. he has a pocket/personal dimension (like lucy's) but can only be accessed through clothings, not restricted to his cloak. like if you're tiny enough to fit his pocket, you might slip into his personal dimension. and i like to think that his personal dimension can be anything he wants. one day it's a big mansion with things he has stored inside scattered all over the floor. and the next day it is probably a circus tent with creepy mannequins around. who knows. i think that's cool. great fanfic source lmao

there are a few similarities between The Overcoat and Anne of Abyssal Red—they are a type of personal dimension and time flows differently than the real world.

some key differences could be that: Nikolai may or may not change the appearances of his personal dimension. The only way to enter his dimension is through clothings/fabrics. Nikolai can still access his dimension without having to teleport himself fully to there. Obviously he doesn't have a big monster waiting in his dimension. He also doesn't have fancy mechanisms like prison door or things like that. His dimension is literally just a fancy storage room.

i remember, a few people here have mentioned that time does not flow in Nikolai's pocket dimension. there are multiple evidences of this. this poll he unleashes moves on a very great speed. he also mentioned that he can dump a blast of explosion just like that.

he could be dropping the poll from a great high and as soon as the dropping poll slip into his dimension, the momentum and velocity stayed the same. he could be pulling out a safety pin of a grenade and put them into his dimension, and he can just immediately unleash an unsafe grenade right onto his opponent.

—

B. when there's an entrance, there is an exit. the core of his ability is essentially portal creation. as long as the portal is on, things are still connected (perhaps it isn't restricted to a clothing at all. perhaps he severs his own hand to make a gun appear elsewhere). when he closes one connecting portal, the matter trapped within it will get spliced too.

the most prominent example is atsushi's leg.

atsushi's leg is still connected to himself. the portal is 'connected'. and once nikolai severs it or closes it, the object trapped in that portal is also severed. if we apply this logic, it means that atsushi's bone and flesh are literally exposed openly which makes me gag a bit.

by this logic, nikolai can literally sever anything as long as you are within 30 metres. imagine he creates a 'portal' between your head and neck. he could behead people just like that. i think that will be very cool to see. i mean, he already did so in his chainsaw escape trick, which he has a gap between his body and someone else's—which you know what, i feel that the trick is pulled last minute. nikolai is likely intended to be killed off right then and there idk. wouldn't it be more logic to say that he severed his own body like how he did to his own hand? he can already sever and keep his hand connected, it's not impossible for him to do the same for his whole body.

i like to imagine that in this murder when he 'skinned' someone alive.

nikolai probably creates a portal on the victim's body, which allows him to pry open the skin from inside out. imagine you're being tied up and a pair of foreign hands or blade suddenly appear out from your own body and tear your skin apart.

not gonna lie, i feel like fukuchi's sword amenogozen can be totally be replicated by nikolai up to a certain degree. when amenogozen first made the appearance, i literally thought nikolai was helping to manipulate it. i literally thought fukuchi 'borrowed' nikolai's ability or something. nikolai can stab his knife into a fabric or something (an entrance portal) and the knife would come out from inside an organ (an exit portal). the only difference with how amenogozen works and how the overcoat works is that—nikolai just cannot travel back to the past.

i wonder if he can also sever space like akutagawa, but by portal-ing shit

also, i think his ability really doesn't need his clothing to be a medium? because in sigma's case, does nikolai just create seperate portals on sigma's body? connected to what? can he just create random portals onto any space and matter as long as it's within 30 metres? is it really 30 metres? am i tweaking

—

two things can be true at once. now that i'm properly thinking, Nikolai probably does have a pocket/personal and portal creation at the same time because then he can also keep things and link them. i think i am leaning more to that.

Nikolai is already a strong and versatile ability user (that's my man). ngl i am biased but i do think he can take on a lot of characters. his reflexes and timing is very good—as seen during his fight with atsushi and his timing to jumble sigma (mind you sigma falls from the sky in great velocity). besides, nikolai is spontaneous and chaotic—i imagine it would be hard to figure out his next moves because he can unleash literally anything from his cloak. if he can just create portals with less restriction or medium, he can divert attacks.

i can also take nikolai.

what do you guys think :D

[kittenfangirl20]

(Every Adamsapple fic I make will have Lucifer be a horny simp for Adam)

*Belle Lucifer is kneading Beast Adam’s chubby stomach as if Belle Lucifer was a cat*

Beast Adam: Are you kneading my stomach?

Belle Lucifer: Chubby bellies are beautiful, you are so beautiful, chubby, and perfect.

Beast Adam: 🥹

*Belle Lucifer continues to knead Beast Adam’s stomach and actually starts purring*

[vgtrackbracket]

Video Game Track Bracket Round 5

BIG SHOT from Deltarune

vs.

In the Blood from Hades

Propaganda under the cut. If you want your propaganda reblogged and added to future polls, please tag it as propaganda or otherwise indicate this!

BIG SHOT:

NOW'S YOUR CHANCE TO BE BIG SHOT! BE A BIG BE A BIG BE GET SHOT!

Everyone likes to [CANNED LAUGHTER] at Spamton G. Spamton for being the game's [TUMBLR SEXYMAN], but the theme is a legitimate [MAESTAHPEECE]. The use of previous leitmotifs combined with [CONTEXT COMPILATION] turns a [NO MORE HEROES 2: DESPERATE STRUGGLE] into one with drama, stakes, and [PIPIS]. The lore implications of using [THE WORLD REVOLVING] and [POWER OF NEO], combined with Spamton Neo's [HOT BOD] adds an extra layer of mystery to this [WHOLESALE SEVEN LAYER DIP]. Plus, don't you wanna be a [BIIIG SHOT]?

In the Blood:

song good

Holy shit those harmonies.

[sykosomatic]

detective hoffman x apprentice!male reader <3 (nsfw!!!)

cw: reader gets fucked in a saw trap, no plot just porn, reader giving hoffman head, rough sex, no condom/lube for plot purposes (but you should use those things irl!), hoffman spits at reader, reader is submissive, reader bottoms, hoffman cums in reader’s throat and ass, famous saw bathroom makes an appearance(!).

((as voted on in the poll i posted a couple days ago!))

••••••••

your head was throbbing from dehydration, your eyes opening to a harsh blue light. the blue only made it worse, your eyes straining in the fluorescents. you couldn’t remember much about where you’d even been before this… working on a trap, maybe? that’s the last thing you remembered, but something could’ve happened between then and … whatever was happening now. “ugh…” you groaned, trying to move and get up, and finding out that your wrists were strapped down to the chair you were sat in. and your ankles as well..? what the hell was going on?

“hello..? guys, this isn’t funny…!” you groaned out, your own voice making your head throb. your shoulders felt heavy, and you looked down to see that there was in fact a trap around your neck. you recognized it; amanda had been working on this one. was it finished? was she trying it out on you..? “amanda?” you croaked, hooding for an answer. now that your eyes had adjusted, you knew where you were at. that damn bathroom.

you felt hands on your shoulders — well, they parts of your shoulders not carrying the shotgun trap on them — and you jumped a bit, looking for the owner as he walked around to the front of your chair. you frowned thoughtfully, wondering what had spurred him to put you here, looking around for a timer. what had you done to warrant a trap? you minded your own business, helped when needed… and besides, you’d already survived your own trap. a second wasn’t necessary; you still had the scars from the first. “hoffman..?” you mused, watching him take something out of his coat pocket. a tape recorder. your stomach flipped.

before you could object or voice your concerns for being tested again, he set the tape recorder in your lap. he reached in and pressed a button on the side of your collar, presumably turning it on. there wasn’t a timer — amanda had wired it to be set off some other way. hoffman pressed play on the tape player and his own raspy voice played from the tape.

“hello, young apprentice. i want to play a game.”

hoffman shifted forward. you watched him undo his belt and slide his zipper down as his voice over the tape told you what to do.

“i want you to prove yourself to me. you deem yourself worthy of being an apprentice, and yet you’ve done nothing to prove you can handle it. do you have what it takes?”

hoffman’s cock was what you’d expected for his build and height; it was girthy, and probably a bit above average length. he stroked it slowly in front of you, making your face hot.

“you want me to suck you off,” you gathered, from the very obvious information in front of you. his lopsided grin gave you butterflies. you hadn’t thought of him sexually before, not really, and as you looked up at him you wondered why. he had a nice muscular, dad bod build. his face was attractive, and when he did decide to speak his voice was raspy and rugged.

instead of answering, he pulled a little switch box out of his pocket and pressed a button. you heard your collar beep, as if activated. you’d thought it was already activated… evidently he’d tweaked amanda’s design and added a timer.

“you have two minutes,” came his voice from above you; his real voice, making you shudder. what, you had to make him cum in two minutes using just your mouth to prove you deserved to live? was that what your life was worth, a blowjob? little did you know, he had a lot more in store for you than that.

you leaned your head in and met him halfway, wrapping your lips around the head of his cock. you figured you obviously didn’t have very long so you had to skip the niceties of a really good blowjob; you had to give him a good, fast, sloppy one.

you swirled your tongue around the head of his cock, bobbing your head and trying to fit as much of his girth down your throat as possible. you fought back a gag, clawing your fingernails into the wooden armrests of your chair. his hand found the back of your head, driving his shaft down deeper and making you choke. drool dribbled down your chin, slathering all over his cock as he made you gag on his length. he seemed to like the sound, and hey, if he was gonna help you win, who were you to object?

your drool coated his cock as you gagged, practically streaming down his length and balls. he grunted in pleasure after a moment, shoving your head down even further. the hair at the base of his cock tickled against your nose and chin. he held you there for a moment, his grip tight on the back of your head as he growled lowly, cumming deep into the back of your throat. you sputtered and choked, drooling his cum out of your mouth. you tried to swallow what you could, not knowing whether or not that would get you penalized.

you expected him to disarm the collar once you were through sucking him off but he didn’t. he undid your leg restraints, and you stayed put. why hadn’t he disarmed the collar?

hoffman undid your wrist restraints, grabbing you roughly and turning you around, shoving your knees into the seat of the chair. you grinned in protest but didn’t say anything else just yet. what else was he going to do to you?

hoffman restrained your wrists on the top of the back of the chair, tying your wrists up between the rungs. “i… won.. didn’t i?” you asked. as soon as the words left your mouth you knew better than to have asked them and your face went red as hoffman yanked your pants down, exposing your bare ass to the undeniable chill of the room.

“oh, am i mistaken? have you proven yourself worthy to me?” he spat at you, first in his tone and then actually spitting at the rim of your asshole. he was going to fuck you. why did the thought of that make you so aroused?

“well.. my two minutes was up.. wasn’t it?”

hoffman chuckled, like he knew something you didn’t, and he wasn’t going to tell you.

“did you like my mouth so much you wanted the real thing?” you asked playfully, biting your lip as you awaited his response. he smacked your ass, hard, and you gasped. “fuck!”

“maybe so,” he muttered, chuckling at your reaction. you could feel, but not see, his cock aligning at the entrance of your asshole. it made you clench up in anticipation but you quickly realized that would be a bad idea. you relaxed your body as much as you could as you felt his slobber and cum covered cock sink into your asshole. god, was he so girthy. you moaned deeply, spreading your legs the best you could to give him room. his cock was warm and wet as it slid up into you, making you whine as he sheathed himself all the way in.

he gave no warning as he slid slowly out that he’d slam back into you, and you hadn’t expected one, but it would’ve been nice. you saw stars as he pounded his cock into you, hitting that oh-so-special spot about the third time in. it had you unraveling in seconds, drooling and whining. his hands held tight to your ass, so tight you were sure there would be bruises. and occasionally spanked you to get a good reaction.

“oh, fuck!” you cried out as you came, splattering the chair with your cum. your legs shook as he kept taking you, making your eyes water. he was fucking you so hard you’d started getting lightheaded. you moaned and whined incoherently, your head bobbing with his movements like you were some sort of rag doll. god, it felt so good.

“shit, shit!” you cried out as he milked a second orgasm out of you. how had he done that? your asshole was raw and sore by the time you came from him pounding out that spot. that was three now? your wrists were rubbed raw from the writhing and wriggling he was working out of you, and you couldn’t bring yourself to care that much.

hoffman was quiet save for the occasional grunt or groan, right up until the end where he started almost growling. you could feel him being impossibly rougher as he got to his orgasm; he was clawing at your sides, back, and ass. as he came, he held your ass cheeks flush against his hips, keeping you there as he unloaded himself into you. he filled you up, making you moan out at the sensation. “fuck…” you breathed out as he finished.

hoffman pulled his cock out of your ass, slow and deliberate as he watched his cum spill out of you and down your thighs. he smacked your ass one last time, pressing the button to disarm the collar — finally — making relief course through you. he undid your restraints, unexpectedly, and wordlessly walked away. “i had fun too..!” you called to him as he walked off, leaving you there covered in his cum.

[albinoratman2200]

this weeks art poll!

[mydaddywiki]

Gary Patterson

Physique: Average Build Height: 5'9" (1.75 cm)

Gary Allen Patterson (born February 13, 1960 -) is an American football coach and former player. He was most recently the special assistant to the head coach at the University of Texas. He is the former head football coach at Texas Christian University (TCU) and the coach with the most wins in Horned Frogs' history. Patterson led the TCU Horned Frogs to six conference championships and eleven bowl game victories. His 2010 squad finished the season undefeated at 13–0 after a 21–19 Rose Bowl victory over the Wisconsin Badgers on New Year's Day 2011, and ranked second in the final tallying of both major polls.

Deliciously cute, his weight fluctuates but I like it when he's on the thicker side and if you look closely, you will note that he's a free baller. I can't wait to see him running around the sidelines again, watching him get all sweaty out there and things… boucing around. OH GAWD! Sorry… I need a moment.

Of course he's married with three sons and grandson. He also plays guitar, even produced an album. He's pretty much the perfect "daddy." Great dad bod, great smile, thick cut meat, hangs hard right. Mmm… This is the kind of man I could spend hours with. Look at him. He just looks like he'd be a good fuck. Top… bottom… just a good fuck. Would love to let Gary use me as his fuck boy, let him stick it and blow it, wherever he wants!