#boatem spaceship is

[shortfeather]

Other ideas my brain has made while waiting for carpal tunnel to go away:

-soup group knights sent on a quest to conquer the dungeon (decked out 2)

-bad version of the crossover event where the rift takes them to hels instead because hels has broken through into empires (I have just learned about the helsmits/helsknight and. Help. There’s so much here to do and see)

-pearl as the last human in her ruined city making first contact w aliens (other hermits arriving from s8 yes this is fucky wrt to boatem and the timeline but.)

-very satirical take on a horse girl movie starring bdubs where also I get to pepper in an annoying amount of dressage and conformation jargon (lifelong horse girl gender neutral term)

-cosmological entities (life series winners) coming into their godhood in a new universe (this would literally just be context for the song I’ve already written to distract me from writing stories until my carpal tunnel is healed)

-team ranchers stardew valley (expanded) au where Jimmy moves to Hermitopia (pelican town) and keeps getting roped into adventures with one of Marlon’s guild members, somehow. Xisuma is the mayor but he’s much much better than mayor Lewis

-boatem spaceship succeeds and rescues tango before he crashes into the moon (part of a larger series where the hermitheus, which isn’t a matrix ship here but a large colony space station of sorts, serves as a rendezvous point for the refugees of s8)

-impulse’s plot armor/main character syndrome finally getting him in trouble in phasmophobia when GIGGS faces off against a genre-savvy ghost (scott) (I don’t know why it’s scott my brain just insisted it was scott and now it can’t be anyone else)

It’s been three days. I moved across the country in those three days and I still came up with all this. Help me

[where-is-isnail]

He is in the boatem spaceship

Currently, iSnail is reliving the simulation memories of Season 8 and is on the Boatem Spaceship!

He and Impulse miss the chocolate factory.

Thank you to this anon for keeping up updated on his whereabouts!

iHope everyone has a safe and lovely day! :)

[qprsmackdown]

Boatem (Hermitcraft S8) vs All Of The Mechanisms (The Mechanisms)

Boatem propaganda: I think they have dogpile sleepovers every night and take turns on which house they go to for them, there’s a whole schedule for it They built an area together and came up with the dumbest meeting ideas. They went moon mad together, they took a spaceship into the void together, turned the end of the world into a fun sleepover with no sleeping. I love them.

Mechanisms propaganda: look they're a band of immortal space pirates . relationships get complicated and i like to think they're all in a big qpr together because it makes me happy IM SORRY DO YOU THINK NOTHING WILL HAPPEN IF YOU STICK NINE PEOPLE (AND A SHIP) (HONESTLY DEBATABLE IF ANY OF THEM ARE PEOPLE) INTO A BOX FOR MILLIONS OF YEARS!! THEY JUST HAVE SUCH ENERGY AND LIKE THE LITTLE MOMENTS IN THERE PERFORMANCES WHERE THERE JUST MESSING ROUND AND AGHHHHHH!! ALSO THE CONSTANT ANGST POTENTIAL OF TOY SOLDIER CANONICALLY GOING UH OH ALL MY PARTNERS ARE DEAD GUESS I GIVE UP THEN IT JUST HURTSS!!! BUT HONESTLY I WILL DO ANYTHING FOR THESE LOT LIKE THEY JUST FIT SO WELL TOGETHER

[skydoesthings]

wrote a s8 tango of the tek variety drabble thing

-~*-~*-~*-~*-~*-~*-~*-~*-~*-~*-~*-~*-~*-~*-~*-~*-~*-~*-~*-~*-~*-~*-~*-

LOG 1:

Hello person, whoever you may be. Hopefully someone my home planet of Hermitcraft, if it’s still habitable, or that other liveable planet…what was its name? Yeah, Earth.

My name is Tango-Tek, I prefer to say it as Tango of the Tek variety, but you can call me Tango. I am a blaze, so I can throw fireballs and have other generic fire abilities. I have a fiery tail and my hair is also made out of fire. I can also breathe both oxygen and nitrogen. I have made this travel log, or whatever it even is, as my condition is…pretty bad, I guess.

Our moon, hopefully you’re familiar with the term, was perfectly fine, until a couple months ago, where it started to get bigger. My friends Grian and Mumbo were the first to notice it, then everyone slowly started catching on and making escape plans. Then, as the moon got bigger and bigger, which we eventually realised was actually closer and closer, many side effects started taking place. Chunks of the ground and animals started to fly up and then fall down again, we could suddenly jump much higher than normal, and there were many earthquakes. The Boatem Crew, which had Grian and Mumbo in it, along with some other friends of mine called Pearl, Scar and Impulse, made a cult in which they worshipped the moon and didn’t sleep in the hope of ‘appeasing it’ and getting it to go back called the Mooners, but that didn’t work either. Then those idiots tried to blow up the moon, but no luck. After a while, the chunks of land and animals that had started to float up suddenly stopped coming back down, and we realised that this was our cue to leave. Everyone started leaving the planet some way or the other, as our fear was that the moon was going to crash into Hermitcraft. I had built a rocket and flew away into space, to see where it takes me, and it’s from inside this rocket that I’m recording this right now.

LOG 2:

Update – I’ve landed on a planet. I don’t know which planet this is, but it seems to be quite distant to any other planet I know, and I used to be a scientist along with my friend Zedaph, so that’s saying something. I don’t know if the air outside is oxygen or nitrogen, or if it’s a gas that I’m unable to breathe. I’ve sent a parrot outside to see whether the air is breathable or not.

LOG 3:

Yeah, the parrot died due to suffocation. I stuck my head out for 5 seconds to see if the air was at least nitrogen, but no such luck. However, I did see some  adorable alien-rabbit looking skadoodles outside, so that must be what’s inhabiting the place. Later, I’ll wear my helmet and go out there to do some research about this species.

LOG 4:

MAYDAY MAYDAY MAYDAY!!! THE CREATURES ARE HOSTILE!!! I MANAGED TO RUN BACK TO THE SHIP IN TIME BEFORE THEY TORE ME TO BITS WITH THEIR ABNORMALLY SHARP TEETH, BUT I’VE FOUND OUT THEY CAN EAT METAL AND ARE DEVOURING THE SPACESHIP! I NEED HELP THEY’RE SO CLOSE I-

…

…

*static*

[leo-crafts-theories]

How the Hermits escaped the Moon

I have very specific thoughts on the ways each hermit got from s8 to s9 and I've never had the chance to put them all together, or even mention most of them... I've categorized them and after each list I'll put some explanations of the more specific/less intuitive situations.

Space Travel (up)

Cub*

Jevin*

Doc and Ren

Beef

Wels

xB and Keralis

False

Cub and Jevin... they tried. They're in another section of this list that I'll explain there. I don't buy the simulation thing, so Doc and Ren just had access to a ship - Renbob still gets to be their pilot, but it's just them. (They stopped over at some place Bob knew to get Ren some proper and disguised cybernetics instead of the haphazard spare-parts job he'd been dealing with all s8.) xB, False, and Wels are basically just following canon, with the note that Keralis doesn't technically need a ship to survive in space and probably got onto xB's ship by clinging to the outside until xB noticed. Beef didn't have a canon exit - but his base for the entire season was an unearthed alien spaceship, so it's only logical that that would be his mode of escape!

Xisuma Rescue

Bdubs (forcibly)

Hypno

TFC

Etho

Zedaph

Anyone who was planetside and didn't canonically Leave, would have had to be rescued by an admin. Hypno helped out, speeding up the evac process and coming up with a way of keeping these hermits safe and in some sort of stasis until a hospitable planet 9 could be found. Bdubs went kicking and screaming, but the others were understandably glad to have the way out.

Dimensional Shift

Gem

Xisuma

Cleo

We don't actually know from canon where Gem went. Despite Wizard Gem supposedly being a different character, the amethyst and timing would make Empires 1 make sense as a destination. Plus, Gem and Pearl flew in from Empires in the first place. Xisuma and Cleo are pretty much just what's seen in canon. Cleo might have gotten some help from the resident Voidling - see the last section.

Void Travel (down)

Boatem. Void travel is similar to space travel, but a little more wormhole-y. And unlike a couple of the spacefarers, Boatem had both spacesuits and a pretty good method of transport in Pearl, whose natural dragon form is just about big enough to carry four friends - two on her back, and two in her claws.

Was off-world at the time

Iskall and Stress had been taking an extended stay in their Vault Hunting world while all this went down. They didn't find out immediately, but as soon as they did, Stress volunteered herself to help bring hermits to safety.

Joe

Joe

Yeah I don't know either. I haven't decided whether to headcanon an Xisuma rescue/some other logical method, or have "fly away from the problem, in atmosphere, on elytra" actually work. The latter option is very Joe, and the cartoon logic is very tempting.

Stress Rescue

Cub

Jevin

Tango

I've talked about Voidling Stress recently; she's by far the best-equipped hermit for space travel. She would have also zipped around to direct Pearl and the various spacecraft in the right direction, but three hermits found themselves adrift in space... Cub. Did you really think a llama would get you anywhere?? So Cub might have dug out his old Vex mask for some magical air assist, but that thing's meant more for high-atmosphere than no atmosphere. It fed him enough air to keep him alive, barely, but barely conscious and without a ship, he wasn't going much of anywhere. (Stress was quite distressed to realize that the llama hadn't made it.) Jevin fared only slightly better. He'd been banking on not actually needing to breathe at all, and on his flying machine doing all the moving, but hadn't factored in the fact that space is COLD. And also he does occasionally need air, he just doesn't always realize it... Stress found him in a frozen torpor, clinging to a slimeblock flying machine that was very slowly trundling off in slightly the wrong direction. And Tango... well. We know what happened to Tango. Ironically, he was the only one of the three who was semi-conscious when Stress found him... until his rescue, he mostly wished he wasn't.

This is going under the cut because I couldn't fit it in the flow of the rest. I've written one fic with all of this in mind - just, instead of listing things directly, it's about the emotional aftermath of a few of the hermits who may have had it worst, and Stress still helping them out even after they've been safely rescued.

[skraeet]

hey . hey please answer this is genuienlt urgent . um . what’s a song that reminds you of season 8 / boatem . i’m . working on something and you’re the only person that came to mind to ask

I have never watched season eight I’m so sorry but I’ll give u some songs just based off clips I’ve seen

This is just ambience if ur looking for that type but if u want lyrics

I tried but I’m the last person to come to for season eight 😢

[ask-moonbig]

Bore the shadows that you made, with no light of my own

Lyrics from The Moon Will Sing

word count - 738

content warnings - death

summary - Moon decides to see what it's like to be in the last moments of the apocalypse she causes

note - I felt like writing angst and have this wonderful character to write it for <3

She shifted her mind forward, transferring consciousness into her fake body. The form of light simmered into existence on the ground. Here was the same place she had looked up at the stars with NPG, laying on the grass and watching her celestial form inch across the sky.

This time, the moon was much closer. She could feel the gravity gently tugging upwards and some small stones on the ground began to float upwards.

Moon stretched and looked away. Her eyes fell onto Boatem. The small altar to her stood proudly and she smiled proudly. Nearby, a flying machine holding explosives soared upwards. The smile faded.

She heard shouting. Somebody with wings lifted off the ground but landed again when the low gravity threw them off.

More shouting. Then, the only sounds that reached her ears were the creaking of buildings and whistling winds. The anticipation from the group could be felt across all this distance.

Moon's eyes trailed upwards to the flying machine. She had watched this from above many times so she knew how it was going to end. Still, she released a breath as the contraption missed the moon by a wide margin.

The shouting resumed.

One foot in front of the other. She made her way down the hill and towards the group of mooners. Goosebumps pickled her arms and she held onto her shawl to fight the wind. This body wasn't real but it could still be cold. And it was oh, so cold outside.

Her lips pursed as the voices came into hearing range.

“It's getting closer!”

“I can see that, Scar. We all can”

“Should we try to leave? Go to someone else's base?”

“Yeah, it seems to just be coming down on Boatem.”

“Your sleepless cult didn't do anything for us. We're all going to die here. It's too late.”

She reached the group and walked between the mustached one- Mumbo? -and the one with moth wings. They continued shouting at each other with no attention towards the deity in their midst. Something about humanoid’s minds that just ignored anything they didn't understand.

It appeared that in this loop, the vexborn hadn't made a spaceship. Usually he concocted some redstone nonsense to escape her. This time they were just accepting their fate.

The gravity from the rock hurtling towards them was strong enough that it was able to pick up the smallest of the group. Grian screeched and flapped his wings aggressively but wasn't able to stay in place. The imp jumped up and grabbed onto one of his feet and dragged him downwards. With a groan the roof of the house-wagon was torn off. A rock slammed into Mumbo's torso, knocking him off his feet.

Moon sat down on the grass. She shut her eyes to tune out the chaos around her. The yells of frustration turned into screams of fear. Somebody was crying. The others were at a loss for words to console them but the sobs were muffled as somebody hugged them.

“GRIAAAAAAAAN-” Hm. They finally lost grip on him.

The heat of the moon breaking through the atmosphere touched Moon's skin. With one thought she could go back. She could be inside of her mindspace and be safe. But she had to stay, to experience what she does to these people.

The last few minutes were a blur. At some point she began floating. The screaming of the others was fading as they got torn apart from each other.

Someone slammed into Moon. Her eyes flew open, and her gaze caught the wild eyes of the one with moth wings. Pearl? Yes, Pearl.

“Who- who are you?” She grabbed Moon's hands so the wind wouldn't separate them.

“I'm…” she hesitated, “...a fellow mooner. I'm so sorry this is happening, it's my fault.”

“It's all of our faults. We must have done something wrong. The moon is displeased with us, and I have no idea why.” Pearl was terrified, but guilt was even more present in her face.

Moon's forehead crinkled. She opened her mouth to reassure Pearl that this was not her fault at all but-

She gasped and her hands flew out to steady herself. It was over. She was sitting on the same hill as before. The moon was a distant sphere. Boatem was gone. Not because of the crater that should be there but because it hadn't been built yet.

The loop restarted.

[inarocky]

my Big Moon finale theory is that the next episodes for the boatem people will just be them playing among us.

[shadeswift99]

I can't believe Ren just casually canonized full cast inter-world between season road trips. He could have just claimed that he traveled through space alone to the new season, but he didn't, and now I can't stop thinking about all the things that would have gone on on that ship:

- Usually they have a bit more time to plan these things, but since they had to leave so quickly from season 8 everyone was squabbling over what seats they got

- Somebody definitely asked for a bathroom break less than five minutes after they left

- A few of the Hermits who didn't have on-screen exits (like Zed and Etho) got the ship ready and took the first shift steering

- They picked up Tango, Boatem crew, False, Joe, and anybody else who was drifting through space on the way. They stopped at the vault hunters world for Iskall, and at the world Cleo fell to from the Void to pick them up

- Road trip games include Scar driving Grian mad with "Are we there yet? Are we there yet?" with short breaks for Grian driving Doc mad with "Are we there yet? Are we there yet?"

- TFC spent most of the trip unsuccessfully trying to sleep in the back. Impulse glared at anyone who got too rowdy and woke him up, only to wake him up even more by laughing five seconds later (probably at a less-than-family-friendly Tango joke)

- Holstein is the voice of their GPS. He is supremely unhelpful in every way (and also irritatingly accurate)

- False's eagle and Jellie have to be kept at opposite ends of the spaceship because in spite of it being about two hundred times bigger than her, Jellie seems to think she can eat the giant bird (the eagle is mostly just mildly annoyed)

- X changed clothes in the back so many times as they got close to landing that someone just had to take all the outfits except his old one to make him decide

- Cleo got her hair snakes from "the snakes on a plane incident" about three-quarters through the trip. We don't talk about it

These might have gotten increasingly less canon compliant but they're my-joy-compliant so I simply don't care, thank you Mr Dog I will be imagining this road trip for the next 3-5 business forevers

[dragonflavoredcake]

[In the Boatem spaceship between S8 and S9]

Scar, singing, holding Jellie above his head: We're going on a trip in our favorite rocket ship—!

Grian: One more word and I throw you out the airlock.

[astronomical-bagel]

Boatem: *floating in the void, bored*

Ren, flying up in his spaceship, coffee in hand: Get in bitches, we're going to season nine

[shortfeather]

Post containing a bunch of AUs popped up in my activity so now I get to spend my work shift daydreaming about boatem spaceship rescuing tango

[aggressiveglockenspiel]

okay so.

scar is going to build a lovely spaceship as boatem "are all in need of off world escapes" to get away from the growing moon

from what i can tell from the hermits i watch, their bases are pretty much done, or more or less completed by now

in mumbo's new ep, grian mentioned that he had saved up diamonds in his hourglass for "the whole season"

i'm gonna say that they're going "off world" to a new 1.18 spawn smile

(and that phantom totally killed scar whilst he was talking because they don't want them to leave. and it was very interesting that impulse wasn't there for the meeting at the end...)

[qprsmackdown]

Jon, Martin, Sasha, and Tim (Polychives) (The Magnus Archives) vs Impulse, Grian, Scar, Mumbo, and Pearl (Boatem) (Hermitcraft)

Polychives propaganda: LISTENNNNNNNNBBB. the workplace comedy queerplatonic romance we deserved but never got. they are so important. maybe they all died in the end but THEY WERE IN QPR LOVE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! sasha and tim had a weird thing that no one talks about, tims in love with martin and jon romantically, martin loves jon and sasha, jon loves martin, sashas along for the ride in an aroace way and they r all happy and nothing bad happens ever in their whole entire lives.

Boatem propaganda: I think they have dogpile sleepovers every night and take turns on which house they go to for them, there’s a whole schedule for it They built an area together and came up with the dumbest meeting ideas. They went moon mad together, they took a spaceship into the void together, turned the end of the world into a fun sleepover with no sleeping. I love them.

[rainecreatesstuff]

:00 wait boatem spaceship crew?? that's such a cool idea what i would love to see content of that /gen

like, feel free to tag me if you do or anything that just sounds so neat-

For sure, also here have these rough sketches for the au lol

[aliceblossoms]

A new world

Platonic! Boatem X GN! reader

Warnings: none

Synopsis: after Xisuma’s signal, you return back to earth after spending time in space with boatem. There you get faced with the new unfamiliar terrain as you search for traces of your fellow Hermits. 

A/n: prefer this so much more to my last post, and I’ll try to keep up a good quality with frequent uploads! This is only my second post on this account however so I’ll have to try hard to keep it up, but i have faith. Hope you enjoy

As you had once left the earth with the rest of Boatem, you now arrived back on it. Scar was unsure as he piloted the vehicle, he had no clue where he had landed, or where the others would end up, but his voice wavered in nervousness as he was the only one to see the outside world first through the cameras on the outside of the spaceship, which lead straight to his control room.

Looking at your companions, you were to descend first onto the unknown land, outside the aircraft. The others wished you luck, watching you secure your helmet as you moved to the outside of the vehicle, outside their sight. They would follow closely behind however, as your feet reached solid ground for the first time in what had felt like years.

Grass poked through the grey suit Scar had given you as crewmember, and you could feel it brush around your ankles as you stood, taking of your helmet carefully. Scar had always been on the dramatic side, which left you to question why he had sounded so nervous, surprised even, earlier when he had declared your landing.

Your surroundings seemed normal, with a forest laid in the distance and a clear green valley laid out in front of you. The landscape contained more hills than what you were used to, though there wasn't anything truly unusual in sight.

Grian followed you out first, with Mumbo on his heels as both of them took off their helmets as well. Pearl stepped out after them, and behind her came Impulse as well. Scar was last to leave, and you needed to wait for him to leave his control room.

"It seems ordinary enough, did we land on the right side of the earth?" Mumbo shook his head, looking around as well as he spoke, "I'll be honest, I don’t think so, Xisuma ensured it would be safe to return, but I can't say I see him anywhere."

"Or anyone for that matter." Pearl spoke as she searched the horizon for anyone, or anything else from before the disaster. Impulse started walking around the rocket, curiously taking in all of the horizon as you could hear Scar come down from the ship in the background.

Impulse was the first to call for attention, as everyone gathered on the other side of the rocket, following his pointed finger to the horizon though it was barely needed to see what was going on.

A mountain range, though it lacked detailed from skilled hands with years of experience, sat comfortably on the horizon, though it was far larger and different than any natural terrain you'd ever seen before. Impulse seemed to think the same as he met your eyes, "no one should've been here long enough to create something of that style." he concluded as he tried to understand what had happened.

Scar joined your group outside, shrugging his shoulders as he agreed, "besides that, I'm pretty darn sure that's not anyone's style of terraforming either." Grian nodded along, it wasn't Bdubs' style, or Gem’s, let alone anyone else he could think of that wasn't already part of your group.

"We're bound to stumble upon it, eventually, while exploring." The rest of what once had been the Boatem community agreed, though especially without having found any of the other hermits, none of you were too keen on splitting up right of the bat.

Mumbo, despite his horrible chairman position that he had been appointed to what felt like years ago, took the organization upon himself, "I propose we split up to form a small base camp we can invite others to when we find them, nothing big, nothing fancy, just practical." he looked towards both Scar and Pearl as he spoke, "Please make the shelter not too complicated please. Grian, would you mind joining me to find some food and possibly sheep for beds, and Impulse, why don't you and Y/n go look around for a sign of the others?"

Everyone agreed to the task distribution and headed off in the formed pairs. You all decided to stay beside the rocket, and you and impulse took off towards the nearby forest. Gathering some blocks while you explored only proved necessary to climb over some of the small hills. The two of you occasionally split up to make it easier to find signs, though stayed between hearing distance of each other.

Through the dense maze of trees, you could see a small clearing in the distance, calling for Impulse as he followed the direction of your voice to where you were. First, you arrived at the clearing, and as you stood at the tree line, Impulse's voice came from behind you as he too arrived, in front of a massive hole in the ground that seemed to reach to the middle of the earth.

Your breath caught in your throat as you stepped into the clearing, cautiously walking towards the edge of the hole just to look how deep it actually went, "I've never seen anything like this before." your voice was a whisper as Impulse stood beside you peering down into the hole, a chuckle escaping his lips, "That is definitely new."

"Do you think we should go and tell the others about this?" you questioned, looking up to the sun to see it barely above the roofs of the trees across of the clearing. Had it truly been that long since you had gone out, how late did you even venture out?

"I mean... Probably? The sun is setting either way, so it's probably a good idea either way. I rather go back now that we can still find our way, wouldn't want to run into something like this in the darkness." you nodded along to his words as he gently tugged you away from the hole by your arm.

The darkness from dusk seemed to arrive first in the forest, as the two of you struggled more to navigate back out of the forest. By the time the forest edge came into view, the density of the trees had lessened, and you could see the glow of a campfire in the distance.

Any news had been forgotten as you were welcomed back under the large tent Pearl had set up with Scar and shoved a bowl with beetroot soup into your hands by Grian. New faces, familiar ones, sat around the campfire with their own bowls, smiles on their faces as they laughed and talked, almost as if nothing had happened.

Tango met eyes with Impulse and you, red eyes squinted in a laugh from across the fire as he raised his bowl to the two of you in greeting,

"Welcome to the new season!"