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There's something so wondrously momentous about Style only saying his "I love you" now, when he realises that all the secrets he was keeping from Fadel are already laid bare.
He says this a significant time after Fadel has said his (and, in the context of the wider narrative, after Kant and Bison) and for the character we have seen as prone to glibness, exaggeration and flippancy with his words, that feels incredibly intentional.
Because this confession was the only truth Style had left to give.
Fadel is finally done playing his (poorly thought out) game, done with his (already cracking at the seams) charade, done with giving Style more opportunities to pull at his heartstrings with his earnestness lies.
Fadel is demanding the truth, and tells Style exactly what truth he wants to hear.
And the thing is, there is truth in this: Style's motivations at the start were wrapped up in a deception specifically targeting Fadel.
I know we, as a fandom, harp on about Style "doing all that for a car", but something I would like us all to revisit is what Kant actually says to Style when he first asks Style to "hit on" Fadel:
Kant: You need to help me. You know I don't usually feel this way about someone. And then shortly later, after Style refuses: Kant: Hey, hold on. (Kant grabs Style's hand.) What do I have to do to for you to help me out? Should I pay you?
(Please forgive my inability to gif and watch Style's reaction to this.) Style is visibly surprised and intrigued. Kant seems to be serious about this request, and I think Style decides to test just how important it is to Kant by asking for the one thing he knows Kant will not give up.
Just look the expressions on Style's face. We didn't have the context of knowing Style back then as well as we do now, but this is the look Style gets when he's throwing out a challenge (to Fadel), when he's trying to ferret out some new insight (from Fadel), when he wants to see how someone (Fadel) will react to whatever outlandish (provocative) thing he's said or done.
And when Kant agrees, Style even checks again if Kant is serious about going through with it -- and it's this that convinces Style of the sincerity of Kant's request.
Yes, the car was a factor, and yes Style also wanted revenge and to humble Fadel, but at the centre of Style's motivation has always been a plea for help from a friend.
In episode 1: Kant: Under one condition. You have to make him head over heels in love with you. Style: I'll do it. Not just for the car, but someone like him needs to be humbled by someone like me.
But in agreeing to help Kant, Style really was damning Fadel to play the fool because Fadel's feelings (his heart) was a commodity that Style was fully willing to play with back then.
And there are aspects of truth here too. When Kant tells Style about Fadel (and Bison) being hitmen, Style decides he's done and wants out. Kant reasons that it's more dangerous for Style to break up with Fadel now, because it would look suspicious, but crucially this isn't enough to convince Style.
So Kant, once again, makes the plea to friendship and to his need for Style specifically, and it is this that causes Style to finally cave.
But in doing so, the things that Style agrees to are:
Kant: Work with me. Help me get more information about them. Once we get that, it's done. Captain puts them in jail, and we walk free.
So while Style may not be directly working with the police, he is working with Kant who he knows is working with the police. By proxy, Style is involved with the police, but in front of the empty pool, he makes it clear to Fadel just what that involvement actually entailed:
Style: Kant asked me to take you out so you could leave him alone and he could freely investigate. Fadel: What did he get out of it? Style: I don't know! That ain't my business! All I was asked of is to take you out.
And this, too, actually is true! Since finding out, Style has literally not discovered a single thing that could be remotely useful to the police investigation:
He's found out that Fadel likes to gym at night. He's found out that Fadel uses tenderloin in his burgers. That he runs in the morning before going to the market. That he attends a grief support group.
But these were all things Kant also already knew and could have given the police if it were in any way useful for the investigation.
Even his attempts to get Fadel to confess to his "other job" (something the police also already know) were clearly in service of wanting to save Fadel and/or convince him to give up the life of crime in the hopes that Fadel wouldn't have to be sent away from Style to prison.
But the truths are tangled up in misunderstandings and Fadel's own assumptions now; and also further tainted again by Bison's own hurt over Kant's betrayal. And Fadel literally cannot see -- because his eyes are filled with tears [see: @thisautistic's gifset + my tags] (good grief, Joong, the actor you are) -- the honesty Style is bleeding from the marrow of his bones.
Because the truth is that along the way Style has also found out that Fadel is a good older brother. That Fadel is still hurting and bleeding inside because his parents were murdered. That Fadel wears his favourite bands' make up in secret because he cannot bear the thought of other's judgement. He's found out that Fadel misses Style, wants Style, and hates himself for it. That Fadel is afraid to love. That Fadel is acutely aware of his own darkness and cannot comprehend an existence that would not involve someone (Style) rejecting it. That Fadel does not believe that 100% trust is possible, but that he will get himself drunk so that he can offer Style as much vulnerability as he can physically make himself give.
Because the things that Style did find out were all the ways Fadel's heart is soft and tender and precious and worthy worthy worthy of all the love Style has to give.
And Style will stand firm on this truth because this is the only thing he has left to give Fadel.
Because Fadel knows, now, all the ways Style was unworthy of his trust, but crucially has not figured out the most important truth:
Because in all the ways that Fadel has ever known he should want, Style actually IS worthy of his trust. Style knows the truth Fadel is hiding, knows what this man is capable of, knows the danger of being in his arms, knows the likely nonexistent future Fadel has to offer him -- and wants him anyway. -- Quoted from my meta post on the "One day, I'll be your 100%" line.
And as I alluded to in the tags on @yinwaring's insightful post: Style fully embodies the belief he espouses; because even in the face of a gun to his head and Fadel threatening to kill him if he will not admit that this, too, is a lie, Style refuses to give Fadel anymore dishonesty.
And this is because Style knows that the truth matters; now more than ever.
Because Style has had days to grapple with his worry after Fadel's disappearance. Style has had a week's worth of checking the diner only to face the regret he feels about not handling things differently. Style has had to recognise the terror of thinking he had lost something he never even knew he wanted in the first place.
And while Fadel had his realisation back in episode 4, Style never had to face this until Fadel vanished from his life and left a gaping hole in the shape of the absence of Fadel's smile.
So if this is what it takes, if this is the penance that Fadel demands of him, then it is a price Style is most happy to pay.
Because Fadel does not realise is that Style, too, now knows what it means to lose a love worth fighting for.
And in the war Fadel now feels compelled to wage against Style (because, yes, that's definitely still going on), the one damning thing Fadel has failed to recognised is that his only true weapon was leaving Style behind.
Which is why Style has already won. Not because Fadel's walls have crumpled again or because they don't still have a ton of things to talk through and work out (they really, really do), but because Style has already been stripped bare (and I mean this literally, like we all recognise THAT was the reason why Dunk is only in boxer shorts in that scene, right?? Like, I know we were joking about it, but seriously, that was so very intentional and a visual representation of Style being both stripped and, most importantly, freed from the lies he felt compelled to tell Fadel) and this means he has nothing holding him back.
And Fadel can wield his gun and his words and his anger and his hurt, but Style will die on the hill of the truth that he knew and understood and chose to love Fadel anyway, and saved this last confession for when he knew he could tell Fadel the truth without any lingering deception; and when the time is right, when Fadel is finally ready, Style will be there to welcome him back with open arms and, without any hesitation, an open heart.
#the heart killers#the heart killers the series#thk ep 7#fadelstyle#stylefadel#fadel#style sattawat#thk meta#fadelstyle meta#style sattawat meta#joongdunk#hui talks thk#hui talks thai bl#i know everyone is probably so sick of me saying this but style is so utterly earnest and honest and GUILELESS and i adore him so much#and i know episode 7 was sad in many ways but it left me honestly feeling so TRIUMPHANT because style is finally FREE!!#he's free of the last obligation to the promise he made to kant#he's free from the guilt of lying to fadel and actively doing nothing to protect the man he was learning to care for#he's finally finally free to love fadel; simply and truthfully and earnestly and with his whole entire heart#and it will be like nothing fadel's fragile heart has ever experienced and everything he never knew he could have#and i am SO SO SO fucking EXCITED for that!!!!#// ALSO can we talk about how CLEARLY dunk makes the distinction between when style is being earnest and when he's intentionally#being playful/glib/exaggerating something??#like its so drastically different and idk i really appreciate how obvious it is because when he dials it down it feels very very real#like i don't just mean “quiet” because style is loud when he's explaining himself at gunpoint#but he's very honest in every single moment in this scene#and i feel like that really comes through -- not only because he is scared of the gun fadel is threatening him with#but also because he wants to and moreover has no good reason not to tell the full truth now#because if fadel knows then bison knows and that means kant's gig is up too#so yeah... style is free to finally follow his heart in its entirety and you can actually see that clearly in the pool scene
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also currently losing it over this drawing by @/windfancyart on twitter 😩😭
#the heart killers#the heart killers ep3#firstkhao#kantbison#first kanaphan#khaotung thanawat#joong archen#gmmtv#thai bl#bl drama#im CRYING this is so cute 😭#bisons hair 😩🤏🏻#and the pegs#adorable!!!!#yall should follow OP asap bc their drawings are so cute#that scene ended me entirely#props to joong for not cracking up bc i would have lost it
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You idiot. The only person who loves you is me.
#kiseki: dear to me#kiseki#dear to me#they are very dear to me#even though it is hard to follow their thought process sometimes#taiwanese drama#taiwan bl#taiwanese bl#taiwanese series#chen yi x ai di#bl drama#bl series#asianlgbtqdrama#myedit
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i adore how mxtx sorta flipped the idea on the whole top/bottom thing with svsss, and just BL relationships in general.
making bingqiu very open to switching, not making the "bottom" super feminine and actually leaning more to the handsome side compared to the "top", how luo binghe is manipulative sensitive and cries easily, etc. one of the main themes in svsss is literally about sexuality (and possibly even about gender roles).
as a queer asian man myself, i absolutely despise the "yaoi archetype" and it was one of the reasons why i avoided consuming BL media. hell, years ago when i first saw heavens official blessing, i mentally groaned and went, "ugh, let me guess, the bottom is super feminine and innocent, while the top is masculine and experienced." of course, that's not the case now, but it's disappointing how that thought was there purely because of the god awful way fetish-y media portrays homosexual people and couples. because, believe it or not, we are not assigned male/female typical gender roles just because one likes to top/bottom (and even then, it's not even like that! some people have preferences, sure, but it's not so strictly "i'm top/bottom")
so, while i absolutely LOVE the english novel designs (especially luo binghe's cute curly hair, gongyi xiao, etc, and personally believe a lot of the takes from the western artist on the designs are an improvement), i am greatly saddened by people subconsciously assigning shen qingqiu as someone more delicate and feminine and luo binghe as someone super masculine and muscly. like, if you're going to have luo binghe depicted as the western design (i believe this stems from binghe being applied to more western ideals for men, and, admittedly, i actually really love his design), at least don't make shen qingqiu feminine and delicate? don't have his appearance play into the stupid yaoi thing?
i get that people have different takes on svsss, especially how the western version depicts it. but, people just... seem to very over exaggerate the top/bottom roles when it comes to bingqiu (again, these two are, canonically, VERY open to switching).
it's weird, it's uncomfortable, and it comes across as, "so, who wears the pants in the relationship?"
so, can we please have more canonically handsome shen qingqiu? canonically beautiful and pretty boy luo binghe (they literallly state that binghe looks EXACTLY like his mom, su xiyan! while a more handsome woman, is still very beautiful!! plus it is stated several times that binghe is slim, and that shang qinghua made him that way!) or at the very least, a BL couple who actually look like normal people (ok thats a little hard considering binghe is literally supposed to be perfect) and not just a stupid fetishized version of themselves.
and no, i'm not saying that queer men shouldn't be feminine or men who are feminine shouldn't be in a relationship with guys who are masculine, etc.
TLDR: please stop twinkifying shen qingqiu and going against what mxtx defied for us queer men (the stupid yaoi roles). and for the love of whoever you believe in, do NOT think that i hate the english design or people's personal interpretation of characters, i just hate the subconscious assigning of gender roles to bingqiu and how media portrays and fetishizes LGBTQ+ relationships in general.
edit: also i love teardrew's (check them out on twitter!) interpretation of shang qinghua. while i do really like the the eng novel design's tiny scared hamster vibes, teardrew's version just radiates "up to no good, paranoid but suspicious looking bitch" rat man and i love it so so so much. i'm not gonna repost their art bc i don't know how they feel about that but perhaps you can search up "svsss designs" on here, you'll see it pop up eventually lol.
edit 2 (1/16): i just saw someone reblog a post (that im pretty sure was referring to this one because, well, if you saw it i think it'd be a little clear kahxj) that was about how bingqiu switching and completely eschewing traditional top/bottom dynamics was a fandom idea or smth? so now i'm wondering, since i swear i remember that they were open to switching, but it's just that sqq preferred to bottom and/or was just a little too lazy to top. plus, sqq is a pretty unreliable narrator who says he doesn't want something one moment and then he does. how could he say no to bingbing? esp if he seems to wanna try bottoming too. perhaps i'm mixing things up though, idk? so if anyone can find that passage that says he only and strictly wants to bottom or whatever please show me! but i think the point of this post still stands haha (i wanted to ask about it, actually, but when i clicked on the og post's user it turned out that they blocked me ? so that was a little surprising oops. hey if ur somehow reading this, im... sorry for making you want to block me bc of this post? akdhxjj)
#JOIN THE 'STOP TWINKIFYING SQQ' GROUP#did i make sense? i have no clue i just wanted to rant about this#i really pulled a cucumber bro there huh#this also applies to GL#thinking about it more#there should be trans men and women bl and gl#and not in a fetishy way#of course luo binghe is still the big strong protag and taller than sqq but come on#i dont believe luo binghe is a twink exactly?? maybe?? but just feminine in a historical chinese male ideals way#for edit 2:#i was just saying how it made me happy that mxtx didn't follow the yaoi archetypes and how i lov her for it <3#never said bingqiu was never done before and COMPLETELY flipped it over skdhjx#but i do believe that bingqiu did a good job providing variety and such :)#same goes for mxtx's other works as well i love her stuff sm#svsss#mxtx svsss#the scum villain's self saving system#luo binghe#shen qingqiu#luo bingge#shen yuan#luo bingmei#bingqiu#luo binghe x shen qingqiu#danmei
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#bl series#pointlesscandies#bl drama#thai bl#thai drama#gmmtv bl#gmmtv series#williamest#lykn#thame po heart that skips a beat#thamepo#thamepo the series#This is for me because I think it is funny#Obsessed with pepper actually#Yes baby boy be a follower not a leader
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Hey, Chingching, Phi Shin is blushing. Stop it.
HIGH SCHOOL FRENEMY | EP12
#high school frenemy#high school frenemy the series#saintshin#skynani#sky wongravee#nani hirunkit#hsfedit#my edits#I AM LIVING FOR THEIR BANTER#now gmmtv i want this exact dynamic in a bl please#i don't want bl no. 23908409 that's following the exact same formula with the exact same tropes#i can't keep relying on jojo for providing us with content that's a bit out of the box#give me something different pls#i’m begging#oh and on another note#i know people are hoping for a skynani series announcement next week#but they blew up fairly recently and gmmtv has probably had their line-up locked in for weeks if not months#so i feel like we shouldn't expect too much because they may not have had enough time to react and cast them in a new series#UNLESS this was the plan all along#the source material also had everyone swooning over the leads so ig they shouldn't be surprised that QL stans are latching onto them#they'd be stupid to not give them more work together now that they've got the momentum#so i do hope that they'll at least try to keep up the hype until gmmtv 2026 if there won't be any sort of announcement next week#i’ll watch them in 214829347 bromances if i have to#but please do not separate them in the forseeable future
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I've received a sudden influx of followers because of an entirely unrelated textpost from several years ago, which means all of you legally have to read my current interest in order to understand my blog. ooooh you wanna read scum villain's self-saving system so bad (Anna's archive link since the internet archive is down)
some quotes to further persuade you:
also read my fanfiction. hi.
#hello new followers. your options are either to read an absolutely insane book series#or be completely bewildered by everything i post#i recommend the former!#i post about a chinese bl series with the most batshit characters around. be prepared.#if you saw me change the meme no you didn't#i can't think of the right text underneath to properly convey this series#it is an isekai parody and a comedy#but it is also a tragedy. and genuinely disturbing at times. and the emotional scenes hit like a truck#it's so good. crazy fucking series#the six balls quote happens after one of the most gut wrenching major character deaths and I love it here <3
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didn’t expect news of MewTul’s proposal to shock me out of my BL coma- while I’m getting ready for a body paint transformation ala your favorite artist’s favorite artist- but here we are.
how the hell are ya & happy gay Christmas 🗽🎃
#mor rambles#chappell roan#halloween 2024#my hiatus started with the current bls just not doing it for me#& it really cemented following a breakup#but this summer? this fall too?#so. goddamn. good (minus the hurricanes)#I’m making art my career is thriving my found family is expanding by the day#i’ve been curating a life i’m in love with#youngins take heart#it *will* get better for you too (life always does)
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(˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶)
#I've had the cutest interaction today#So like yesterday? There was this post I saw on my dash that was like “you want to know extra info about museums? Just befriend a–#guide! That way you can also unlock the Secret Backscene” and I was like. Lmao. Who could ever befriend a museum guide I've never–#even personally met anyone who works at museums?#... Well. Guess what happened today#I was following this guided museum tour with a friend and when the tour came to an end I was happily chatting with her when the guide.#Shyly chimed in and was like “is that an Atsushi keychain?” And I was like !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#And I was like‚‚ omg‚‚‚ Do you happen to know‚‚‚ This one series‚‚‚‚‚‚#And they unsheathed their phone like a fbi distinctive in American movies to show me their fyo/zai background amjdsgawsjda it was SO cute.#They were adorable. And I got so embarassed but trying to keep my cool while internally I was like‚‚‚#Omg the Cool Museum Guide™ is talking with me about my hyperfixation‚‚‚‚‚‚ What is happening#We talked a bit about the manga it was such a nice and sweet exchange. They said they like Dostoyevsky and I was like yeah he's so cool!!!#They said they're sorry about Bram it was REALLY cute (´;ω;`)#I didn't want to hamper them too much so I took my leave shortly after but I'd actually really like to pay visit again–#when the new chapter is out??#Hhhhhhh I don't want to look stalkery and like go look for them on their job. But also like‚ they looked genuinely happy and as excited as–#I was when we were chatting and I believe in the power of human connections through shared hyperfixations#The possibly funnier part is that then my friend went “Wait you're into b/ungo stray dogs??” and like alright. This is less surprising.#I already knew she likes manga.#What actually left me quite baffled was that... She really didn't know I was into b/sd. When it's literally what I think about 24/7#Something very similar happened just a week ago. My friend gifted me a manga volume of a series she really likes for my birthday#But when she was giving it to me she awkwardly went “oh‚ just‚ it features romance between two guys. I hope that's okay with you...”#And I internally had to pause and realize that no.#In fact most of the people I hang out with don't know I spend half my time curating a bl focused blog.#It's just funny in a way? I got so used to concealing my hyperfixations I didn't even realize I actually got quite good at passing–#for someone who is normal about stuff.#random rambles
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Nat Chen birthday fanmeet. Credit in source.
#please be cautious with following fansotes the majority of them are bullying Louis Chiang and being hateful#kiseki: dear to me#kiseki dear to me#taiwanese bl#nat chen#chen bowen#see your love
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QL Schedule 08.07.24-14.07.24
MONDAY
Takara No Vidro The Secret Of Us (or for free on youtube on Thursday)
TUESDAY
-
WEDNESDAY
We Are My Marvellous Dream Is You The Rebound I Hear The Sunspot Century of Love
THURSDAY
Meet You At The Blossom Knock Knock Boys Ayaka is in Love with Hiroko
FRIDAY
My Stand-In My Love Mix-Up Thailand This Love Doesn't Have Long Beans
SATURDAY
Wandee Goodday Sunset x Vibes
SUNDAY
The Trainee Love Sea
starts airing soon:
10/07 Century of Love 11/07 Meet You At The Blossom 24/07 I Saw You in My Dream 25/07 Mr. Mitsuya's Planned Feeding 26/07 4 Minutes 29/07 Battle of the Writers 04/08 The Loyal Pin 05/08 Cosmetic Playlover 07/09 The Hidden Moon 11/09 Unlock Your Love
waiting for international release:
? A Man Who Defies the World of BL S3 (you can watch here with fansubs) ? The Time of Fever
#ql schedule#ql#thai bl#thai gl#upcoming bl#upcoming gl#mine#you can follow the ''ql schedule'' tumblr tag for now cause i will be sharing it regularly#if i'm missing any please send me a series name in replies/dms/asks#myatb is here cryingg
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I posted this on twitter at the beginning of the show haha joke on me.
#star wars#star wars the bad batch#THE END WAS HHHHH#me now:#HAAAAAA#I WANT TO FANART THIS SHOW FOR THE NEXT FOUR MONTHS COMING#People who don't follow me from my other blogs aren't really gonna get this but I'm referencing a niche 80s BL here#anyway#I've got fanarts to do I said#because it's been a week I haven't posted anything I'm getting anxieTY#delete later#also no I don't look like this at all#rip my friend tho#who has to endure me calling every character babygirl#and the character is Grievous/Crosshair#and squeaking at the night sisters#yeah definitely delete later this
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"I respect your feelings."
↳ requested by anonymous ♡
#cherry magic#cherry magic th#jintamin#jinta x min#cherry magic th ep12#juniormark#junior panachai#mark jiruntanin#gmmtv#thai bl#bl drama#gif request#one of my favorite scenes 🥺#followed by the fans asking jinta for an autograph sdjhlfsd my boy made it I'm so proud 😩😭🧡#they really said lets take very single one of these stories and give them the ending they deserve#even with Rock and his office rockstar tiktok account#which is something I almost forgot about tbh#that made me so emotional#they really thought of everything#even the tiniest detail#UGH#what a show#its been 24 hours and I'm still a mess#I'll never be over it
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the mood for this scene.... is insane... literally THE most beautiful scene in a thai period lakorn i have ever witnessed. fearing for my life that i feel you linger in the air is deehuphouse's magnum opus because i don't see any of their future works living up to what ifylita brought to thai bl history
#i feel you linger in the air#claire opens her goddamn mouth#ifylita#it's so funny whenever y'all see me rambling on here it's either ranting abt thai bl conventions or random ifylita thoughts#my sincerest apologies#to those following me for anything else#the classiness and elegance of ifylita.... not a lakorn but not quite your typical bl series either... a queer period series#austen-coded thai bridgerton meets outlander we love thee
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MLM ships are like "we used to be so close, but we once got angry and said really mean things to each other, and our relationship still carries a lot of tension from that ):" while WLW ships are like "Yeah, she killed my father in front of everyone, but she also feels bad about it so I think it's time we move on from that (:"
#this is about the two following ships#haikaveh#clorivia#anything else is just a coincidence#i just find it hilarious that hoyoverse gave us this two academics that wont be honest because their project fell through#while also giving us Navia going 'yeah i invited clorinde to dinner i know she killed my dad and all but i think we can be friends'#a moot on twitter mentioned how men are raised to not being honest about their nonagressive feelings and how they are also#not good with communication in general as a result#which yeah makes sense to see this dynamic in a bl#and that made me remember how women are raised and expected to be forgiving regardless of the situation#so it makes sense that they would write Navia going 'yeah we resolved that offscreen we are cool now (:''
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completely normal way to say goodbye to your friends
#obsessed with this move actually#and how they all go along with it despite initial confusion#and then the follow through by resting his own chin in his hand kjflskajda#this should become a thing#kiss me again#thaidramaedit#thai bl#dark blue kiss#*mygifs
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