#bloody axe wound

[jdmorganz]

JEFFREY DEAN MORGAN as Butch Slater Bloody Axe Wound (2024) dir. Matthew John Lawrence

[maritamorgado]

Jeffrey Dean Morgan behind the scenes of his new movie “Bloody Axe Wound”

[splatteronmywalls]

[wrdlbrmpfd]

What the fuck is this? Producers: Jeffrey Dean Morgan and Hilary Burton Morgan?

You expect me to believe that JDM did more than to attach his (good) name to this wannabe teenage horror slasher? Between filming the sequel to "Postcard killings", "TWD: Dead City" and I don't know what else he had the time, the nerve and the lust to produce something? Seems more of the attempt of his (unemployed) wifey to make a name as a producer. Yeah, thanks, we've seen that with Elta and CM.

[movieposters1]

[cantsayidont]

Hateration:

BLOODY AXE WOUND (2024): Gory, clunky Shudder horror-comedy about a young woman named Abbie Bladecut (Sari Arambulo), the adopted daughter of a nigh-indestructible mad slasher (Billy Burke) who's made a business out of selling videos of his slaughter of hapless teenagers, but won't let Abbie follow in his footsteps because she's a girl and thus not scary enough. Determined to prove her own slasher bona fides, Abbie infiltrates the local high school and promptly falls for one of her would-be victims (Molly Brown), much to her father's displeasure. Arambulo and Brown are adorable, but the premise is half-baked and the tone wavers uneasily between too soft and too mean. CONTAINS LESBIANS? Yes! But watch out! VERDICT: Feels like it was clumsily retooled from a failed feature pitch for Tim Seeley's HACK/SLASH comic, which would probably have been more coherent.

NORA PRENTISS (1947): Preposterous melodrama about a stiff married doctor (Kent Smith) whose affair with a nightclub singer (Ann Sheridan) leads him to demolish his entire life, fake his own death, and eventully stand trial for his own murder! The only way this absurd story might have worked would have been to play up the protagonist's roiling psychological turmoil, but director Vince Sherman stages it all as a bland soap opera, and Smith has neither the range nor the charisma necessary to make his character's bizarre downward spiral credible or compelling. Contrary to expectations, Sheridan's Nora is not a femme fatale, but rather a saucy but good-hearted dame of a kind that was once a Warner Bros. house specialty. She's the only thing in this film with a pulse, but it's a thankless role, and the ludicrous third act forces her to behave in ways that make no sense. CONTAINS LESBIANS? No. VERDICT: An inexplicably big hit in 1947, but Smith is awful, and the story's a real eye-roller.

NOSFERATU (2024): Badly written, badly acted, periodically offensive Robert Eggers remake of the 1922 F.W. Murnau silent (which was an unauthorized, Germanized adaptation of DRACULA, remade in 1979 by Werner Herzog). Full of over-the-top gothic sturm-and-drang, but hampered by a weak, racist script and terrible casting. Nicholas Hoult is barely adequate as Thomas Hutter (read: Jonathan Harker), but it's tough to say who gives the worse performance: Lily-Rose Depp as Ellen Hutter (read: Mina Harker), who wears out her welcome after precisely one scene of her bulging-eyed faux-epileptic contortions; Bill Skarsgård as Orlok, unrecognizable beneath his prosthetics, but apparently determined to make Gary Oldman seem like a master of underplaying; Emma Corrin, unbearable as Anna Harding (read: Lucy Westerna); or Aaron Taylor-Johnson as Friedrich Harding (read: Arthur Holmwood), of whom the less said the better. The one saving grace is Willem Dafoe, who has a ball as the eccentric Professor Von Franz (read: Van Helsing). Where it leans into its Goth excesses, it works in fits and starts, but the cast and script are so bad you'll root for the rats. CONTAINS LESBIANS? No. VERDICT: Just watch the Herzog version, or the original, or SHADOW OF THE VAMPIRE (2000), or THE HORROR OF DRACULA (1958), or the Frank Langella DRACULA (1979), or LOVE AT FIRST BITE, or…

[moviesandmania]

BLOODY AXE WOUND Comedy horror - overview and trailer

‘High school can be a killer’ Bloody Axe Wound is a 2024 comedy horror film about a teenager who wonders whether to continue her family’s grisly business. Directed by Matthew John Lawrence (Uncle Peckerhead). The movie stars Molly Brown, Sari Arambulo, Jeffrey Dean Morgan, Billy Burke and Eddie Leavy. Plot: Abbie Bladecut is a teenager torn between the macabre traditions of her family’s bloody…

[bloodsplatteredcinema]

BLOOD SPLATTERED VLOG: BLOODY AXE WOUND (2024)

New Blood Splattered Vlog!

This week The Horror Guru & Count Jackula review BLOODY AXE WOUND!

A horror comedy about an aging slasher killer and his daughter who wants to inherit the family slashing business, but falls in love with her final girl!

[viral9ja]

Bloody Axe Wound (2024)Movie

Abbie Bladecut’s family business, a video store, has thrived by disposing of teenagers to mimic horror movies. As the first female slasher, she battles gender bias while realizing the harsh realities behind the mass murders. VIDEO INFORMATION Filename: -Bloody.Axe.Wound.2024.540p.x265.AAC.[viral9ja.com ].mkv Filesize: -153MB Duration: 01:23:18 Imdb: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt6975842 Title:…

[themnmovieman]

Movie Review ~ Bloody Axe Wound

BLOODY AXE WOUND Synopsis: In the small town of Clover Falls, Abbie’s father, Roger Bladecut, has built an infamous legacy by capturing real-life killings on tape and selling them to eager customers, but as Abbie delves deeper into the grisly family business, she begins to wonder if it’s time to take the family tradition in a new direction.Stars: Sari Arambulo, Molly Brown, Eddie Leavy, Jeffrey…

[jdmorganz]

JEFFREY DEAN MORGAN as Butch Slater Bloody Axe Wound (2024) dir. Matthew John Lawrence

[maritamorgado]

[scarevalue]

A light week in new horror trailers gives us a first look at The Gorge

[halloweendailynews]

'Bloody Axe Wound' Trailer Previews New Slasher Horror Comedy

Bloody Axe Wound' Trailer Previews New Slasher Horror Comedy

The official trailer has just dropped for the new horror comedy Bloody Axe Wound, previewing a fun meta twist on the slasher subgenre, coming theaters and VOD this month. In the film, Abbie Bladecut is a teenager torn between the macabre traditions of her family’s bloody trade and the tender stirrings of her first crush. In the small town of Clover Falls, Abbie’s father, Roger Bladecut, has built…

[bloodybosom]

2,000 Maniacs

[soapcloth]

Fantasy au -> Warrior!Soap x Healer!Reader

CW: 18+ MDNI, light bloodplay, noncon undertones, dacryphilia if you squint

not edited - 800 words - dividers -> @/cafekitsune

You’ve had just about enough of that axe-swinging asshole, built like an ox and thrice as stubborn.

You’re absolutely beside yourself asking why you’re sticking it out in his half-baked party. John, as he had practically breathed the name down your neck, couldn’t keep a decent healer and now you know all too well why. He was mean, smelly, loud, and worst of all- overly familiar despite your best efforts to stamp out any flame of acquaintanceship. You could write ballads dedicated to reasons you should leave this party, but truth be told? You were down on your luck. You wondered sometimes if you were cursed with misfortune, a hilariously horrid timeline of events leading you to this very position right now. So you’ve made a few mistakes, hasn’t everyone in the pursuit of dungeon crawling?

Even so, was the state of your freelance healing career really so bad that you had to saddle up with someone like John MacTavish? The man had been naught more than a trail thief brute-forcing his way into other parties’ treasure a few years ago, but because of a few lucky encounters in monster slaying, suddenly he was picking up jobs in adventurer hubs like it was something he was born to do. It pissed you off to no end and he knew it. Loved seeing your indignant scowl while you healed him up knowing better work was near impossible for you to come by.

“Och- that’s it, ‘m sore there.” He’d groaned, humid breath fanning your skin, god, why was he always so close? “Gonna show me that pretty glow, lamb?”

“No.” You bit, rubbing the salve a touch deeper than needed. Your lips twitched seeing his eyebrows draw tight. “It’s not so bad that you need healing, stop being a baby.”

The man snorted in response. “That’s why no other parties’ll take ye on, lamb.” His deep blue eyes searched your own, a wild smirk twisting across his mouth. “Terrible bedside manner.” You flushed slightly, shooting him a sharp glare that caused him to lean back on his makeshift fallen and rotted log seat with a pleased grin as he inspected his wound. Like the ever-expressive man he was, his face suddenly took on a shade of concern. “Ach-!”

“Huh?” Was all you could muster, confused as to what he could be so worried about.

“Think I got nicked by something venomous, lamb, need yer healing.” He seethed out. “Oh for- let me see.” You sighed, grabbing his uselessly huge hand. As expected, his palm was fine, albeit still a bit bloody as the salve worked to stop it.

Wrong move.

Upon inspecting his wound, the adventurer managed to shove his palm into your face with a vicious grin, huffing through his nose a bit as he smeared blood across your mouth. Sputtering only invited the acrid taste of bitter salve, sweat, and copper onto your tastebuds as he laughed and continued to wipe his hand across your face. “See?” He chuckled “M’still hurt.” His eyes seemed to glisten like the northern stormy coast seeing his own blood on your skin. “Suits you.”

You pushed his hand away, misinterpreting his words in a way that scratched at a sore spot of your own. “I didn’t kill them, John! Stop holding that over my head!” You snarled, causing his eyes to widen a fraction. You wiped his blood off your face with your arm, only to smear it around more and get it on the limb. Great. It was then you realized you had a runny nose as well, were you starting to cry? “I fucked up- but my god, they lived, okay?” And now you couldn’t get a gig better than this one because of that fact, a voice in the back of your head snarked. It’s true too, they made sure no party worth its salt would ever take you on. You still have no idea why John did either in all honesty, for all his faults and the high turnover rate, he had a seemingly bottomless fount of healers willing to take a shot at being the one to stick.

John cupped your cheeks. “None of tha’.” He spoke lowly. One of his calloused thumbs swiped at an emerging tear before it could fall and you had to watch, mouth slightly agape as he brought the pad of his thumb to his lips without much thought, tongue darting out to taste. You blinked as he clapped that hand down on your shoulder, leaning closer. “None of tha’…” he repeated, quieter this time. He looked so focused. “Dinnae give a shit about those no-names, lamb, neither should you.”

You swallowed audibly when met with his intensity, his voice a rolling growl. “Fuck- seeing ye all covered in my blood’s got me stiffer than a rock. Palm’s busted and you won’t heal me. Cannae do a thing about it, feel like ah’m gonna-“

“I can heal your hand.” You urged, the oppressive haze he left you with suddenly lifting.

He snorted in response. “Though so, lamb.” His palm connected with your hair, ruffling his blood into your locks before moving down to pat your cheek. “What a dutiful healer ye’ are… So good te’ me. Let me see tha’ gorgeous glow.”