#bipolar ramblings

[bipolar-ramblings]

First attack of the year, @shirecorn's Gossamer! I saw this boy and immediately fell in love, such a pretty design! It was a bit challenging, but I hope I did him justice <3

[thevirgodoll]

a lot of people have destroyed others by saying “I love you” but throwing them away in the trash later when communication is off. why say “I love you” if you’re going to lose patience and kindness later? why say “I love you” if you can’t have perspective for your partner’s pain, not just yours? why say “I love you” if you’re going to devalue and discard?

sometimes, people idealize us and love who they create us to be… and never get to know who we really are. they get upset when we don’t fit their projections. they think feedback means you love them less. they think days YOU are struggling is hatred. they think their lashings for going outside of the “rules” is love. they cast fear and doubts on us because they don’t even love themselves enough yet to believe you love them.

people are doing things in their best interest and should just admit it. they say they love you to get something from you. they don’t even know what “love” is. they don’t even understand the concept. when they have it they destroy it with their bare hands. but they would never want anyone to do the same.

I am tired of everyone using “love” so loosely when the truth is that they love the future ahead and can’t even have patience learning who we are now. genuinely would rather die than ever hear it again fr

[gravedangerahead]

It might sound like I claim every single ship I like is autist4adhd, but you have to take into consideration the fact that I'm always right and have great taste

[dogboydickswizzle]

These will occur with mere moments between each other

[graveyarrdshift]

[iamumbra195]

So I was reading this blog post/article about adrenaline rushes and bipolar disorder after reading @moonbiine and @stillfrownyclownlol's posts about Aiden having BPD and the author was talking about their latest adrenaline rush.

Essentially they were doing the Edge Walk at the CN Tower, in Toronto, ON. When they got down, they said the adrenaline rush was amazing and that they couldn't stop smiling afterwards. It didn't feel like hypomania and they realized for the first time that they feeling something besides pain and depression. That felt like a person.

They realized it was kinda depressing that it took hanging so high in the air and putting themself in danger to actually feel that way.

But to a little kid, feeling like that, riding that high after feeling like shit for so long? It's no wonder that Aiden became an adrenaline junkie.

Every time we see little Aiden, he looks miserable and depressed.

So maybe one day, his parents decided to take him to do something super exciting to try and cheer him up. And then he felt that rush of adrenaline, the pride of accomplishing such a dangerous task and he was hooked.

His parents were probably glad he started to smile and pick up new hobbies, even if each one seemed more dangerous than the last. So they indulged him. Let him do what he wanted as long as he was happy.

I mean, why else would he be able to do all these things when he would permission/supervision from his parents for like half since he's 15-16 years old?

Although, Red recently said that she did write him with ADHD in mind and a lot of articles said that, "People with ADHD may compulsively seek high-dopamine activities and stimuli to achieve a dopamine rush, so people with ADHD may be more likely to engage in impulsive and risky behaviours. An individual may seek any situation that incites a strong burst of dopamine in the brain. 

People with ADHD may describe themselves as adrenaline lovers, never satisfied, and always seeking what is out of reach." Or something along the same lines.

Either way, him having bipolar disorder, BPD or ADHD is really cool and I'd love to see more people talking about it.

(Please forgive me if I accidentally said something potentially incorrect or offensive, I'm not claiming to be an expert on either disorders.)

[bipolar-sad-and-ready-to-cry]

I was gonna draw some cute pictures for some asks I got but I hit my elbow on a solid wood pole my grandma has next to some stairs while doing laundry and now I am feeling sad.

It’s not my dominant arm that got hurt but it’s the arm I use for holding my iPad when drawing

[10piecechickenmcnugget]

guy who’s in denial

[thetorturedlovergirl]

Can’t be on tumblr bc of the seniors trip but wanted y’all to know I can’t stop thinking about Clara Oswald that woman makes me go crazy and I’d make poems and religions around her

[bluepandadraws-log]

what if we gave jax extreme mood swings/what i think bipolar means

Mmmayhaps, I think more of him having ASPD, BPD, ASD, ADHD and NPD, but Bipolar disorder is also feesible

[adhdstudybitch]

My bipolar folks who experience mixed episodes, how the fuck do you cope? For months I thought I've just been having a depressive episode, but the reality hit me tonight that I've been experiencing hypomanic symptoms as well, and I now understand why all the shit I usually do for full depressive episodes isn't working.

I recently went up on Caplyta (from 42 to 52.5 mg) and I don't think it's done much. Therapy has been spent talking about the unbridled rage I've been carrying in my throat my entire life. Idk I would love to hear what others have found helpful outside of meds and therapy.

[bipolar-ramblings]

@colorful-horses your boy Florid is so pretty ;-;

[hollowboobtheory]

god i miss lamictal

[abdominal-void]

Why can I only say “I’m ok” when the answer is really anything but that? I can’t even begin to explain how I’m not ok, never been ok, and live with the reality I will never be ok until I die. Try living like that.

[glacierruler]

I am so sick of the phrase 'delulu is the solulu'

Like, do you not know that delusions are a bad thing? They are a thing that I don't want but do have. They do not make my life easier.

[graveyarrdshift]

the sexual tension between me and relapse