#big picture (everything else) vs small picture (me)

[ham1lton]

SIMPLE !

pairings: jude bellingham x lewis hamilton’s assistant!reader

summary: after your first few dates with jude, everything seems to be going smoothly. however, there’s just one problem: your boss seems to hate your new boyfriend.

warnings: judeyn being dumbasses.

author’s note: part of my dream girl universe. for best enjoyment, read after the first instalment. assistant2 also makes her first official appearance!!

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📍 berlin, germany.

tagged: judebellingham

liked by ham1ltonshaderoom, jobebellingham and 2,837,918 others.

yourinstagram: the photos he takes of me vs the one i take of him. i think you all can see the better photographer.

view all 1,108,928 comments

user1: LOVE seeing hot people date each other.

-> user11: i love seeing two hot people be BESTIES.

user2: JUDE IS TAKEN ???!!!! NOOOOOOO

-> user3: babe… you didn’t have a chance at all. like please be serious.

-> user13: thank god they aren’t actually dating tho.

user4: my gf <3

-> judebellingham: who even are you.

-> user4: we can share <3 i can keep her satisfied thru the weekend u have the weekdays king.

jobebellingham: love this yn. he looks so depressed and ugly.

-> judebellingham: U JEALOUS ASF 😹

-> jobebellingham: yn i’ll paypal you £50 rn if you post more ugly pictures. which is all his pictures really.

-> yourinstagram: challenge accepted 🫡

lewishamilton: you look good yn!

-> user5: and what about jude??

-> lewishamilton: what about him?

-> user6: NOT YN’S HUSBAND HAVIN BEEF W/ HER BFF 😭

user7: lip combo?!!??

-> yourinstagram: i’m not a gatekeeper. it’s on my tiktok!! my most recent one <3

user8: you did my king so dirty with that one pic…. LMFAO DO IT AGAIN

-> yourinstagram: 🫡🫡

user10: their friendship is so cute!!

user12: yn is moving up in the world!!! from bts delulu to besties with JUDE BELLINGHAM

-> yourinstagram: blocking you! 😃

-> user12: you can block me but you can’t erase ‘hobisbabymama’

-> yourinstagram: HELLO?2&/9£/

user9: WHERE IS LANDO?!

-> user10: she blocked his main and his ten other side accounts because she’s secretly in love with him and wants to leave loser jude for him.

-> user9: hi lando 😁

user10: no roscoe pic?

-> yourinstagram: sorry babe :(( he’s at home with his dad and i’m on holiday. assistant2 has some highlights of him on her page!! <3

judebellingham: why do i look so depressed

-> yourinstagram: idk <3 want to get ice cream?

-> judebellingham: .. yeah

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title: my girlfriend’s boss (l,39) hates me and it’s ruining my relationship. help?

hi all, i don’t really post on here, but i’m at my wit’s end and need advice. i (j, m21) have been dating my girlfriend (y, f24) for a couple of months now, and it’s been brilliant. she’s smart, funny, beautiful, and honestly the kindest person i’ve ever met. here’s the catch: her boss (l, m39), who also happens to be an insanely famous athlete and very wealthy, clearly hates me.

y works as his personal assistant, and from what she’s told me, l has always been good to her. she’s known him for years, and he’s helped her out a lot in her career. she always says he’s like family, but ever since she introduced me to him, he’s been awful.

it started small, like him calling me “mate” in that condescending way that makes you feel about two feet tall. but last week, i went to pick y up from work, and he gave me this look—you know the type, the kind that says, “you’re not good enough to breathe the same air as her.” i tried to play it off, but it’s eating at me.

another time, we ran into him at a café, and he made this offhand comment about how “footballers aren’t known for their brains.” y tried to laugh it off, but i felt like an absolute idiot.

then there was the incident with the tickets. y mentioned she’d been offered two box seats for a big match, courtesy of l, and we were both so excited to go. but when she told him i was going with her, he suddenly “remembered” he’d promised them to someone else. i know it sounds paranoid, but it feels deliberate.

to make matters worse, y thinks i’m overreacting. she says l is just protective of her because they work closely together, but i can’t help but feel like there’s more to it. she brushes off his weird behaviour, but come on—this is the same man who asked her to taste-test a box of chocolate truffles because he couldn’t decide which to order for himself. (weird, right?)

it’s not just the comments, though. y told me l doesn’t usually care who his staff date, but she mentioned he’s suddenly started asking loads of questions about me, like whether i’ve been in trouble before or if i’m serious about her. it’s like he’s looking for a reason to disapprove. y thinks he’s being protective, but i swear he just doesn’t like me. here’s the problem: i’m pretty sure he hates me. actually, scratch that—i know he hates me.

i’m spiralling here. what if l starts sabotaging our relationship? y says she’s not going anywhere, but i can’t shake the feeling he’s got some weird power over her. am i just being insecure, or is there something seriously wrong here? what do i do?

top comments:

soggy_pigeon: nah, this is classic alpha behaviour. he’s marking his territory. he probably sees her as more than just an assistant, if you know what i mean. tread carefully.

fluffybananas: footballers aren’t known for their brains. maybe he has a point.

spicy_gravy: dude, he’s probably jealous you’ve got abs and a girl who loves you. chill.

randomuser_123: sounds like you’re dating your boss’s work spouse.

tofu_throwaway: i think l’s just jealous because y spends more time with you now. he’s like a toddler upset that someone’s playing with his favourite toy.

ladybantheboys: ok but what if it’s the opposite? like, what if l approves of you but is being mean on purpose to test if you’re good enough for her?

football4ever: j, mate, you’re overthinking. l’s just a famous bloke who doesn’t want to lose his assistant to some random guy. show him you’re not random. take him out for a pint or something.

memequeen420: this reminds me of when i had a cat and got a new dog. the cat hated the dog at first but now they’re best friends. just give it time.

plshelpme1998: have you tried googling “how to win over your girlfriend’s boss”? there’s bound to be a wikiHow.

bananabreadbae: mate, if he wanted her, he’d have made a move by now. maybe he just doesn’t like footballers. not everyone does, you know.

user2847: honestly, the truffle thing makes me think he’s the weird one. does he do this with everyone or just y? if it’s just her, he’s probably got some weird older-brother complex going on.

ultimategoblin69: maybe he wants to adopt you. famous people do weird shit like that.

yogurtbutter: ok but what if you’re the problem? maybe you’re just a bit annoying and he senses it. famous people have great instincts.

iamnotanon: have you considered sabotaging him back? like, nothing serious, but maybe show up in a better suit than him one day. alpha vibes only.

opinionatedowl: this is a power thing. l’s rich and famous, and he’s used to being in charge. stand your ground, but don’t disrespect him. he’s probably testing you.

thecheeseman: it sounds like a bad rom-com where l secretly approves of you but can’t admit it because he’s emotionally constipated. if i were you, i’d play the long game.

spicywaterlover: wait… what if l is secretly in love with y and you’re the obstacle? plot twist.

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edit: wow, ok. this has been a ride. thanks for all the comments, even the wild ones. i think i’ll try the “pint” suggestion, but i draw the line at sabotage. will update if anything changes (or if i get adopted).

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liked by messyassuser, lando11priv and 1,938,882 others.

ham1ltonshaderoom: football star jude bellingham seen cuddling and being affectionate with his new girl! she has been identified as yn yln, she is the personal assistant of f1 icon lewis hamilton. they were spotted outside a restaurant in las vegas after the grand prix all boo’d up! according to sources, they were all loved up at the after party. they ‘didn’t leave each other’s space’. what do we think about this new couple ham1ltons?

view all comments

user1: who tf even is she

-> user2: a baddie. she’s seriously so funny and sweet. you guys should see her tiktok or insta pages. jude is punching above his weight.

user3: oh!

user4: HOTTIES!!!

user5: why they doing the most in public???

-> user6: they’re in love? girl lmao.

-> user7: she’s his beard or he’s hers. idk yet. i need to consult the stars.

-> user8: ^ me when i’m off my meds.

user9: am i the only one who thinks they’re cute? good for them!!

user10: um i think she’d be happier with lando.

-> user11: lando please how are you still making new accounts.

-> user10: i’m totally not the handsome and gorgeous lando. i’m actually… pando. hi.

user12: my gf and my bf are dating??? i’m gonna be sick.

-> user13: they got two hands.

user14: they’re rlly dating???

-> user15: no bitch. they’re just coworkers 🙄

-> user14: oh! thank you :D

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UPDATE: my girlfriend’s boss (l,39) hates me and it’s ruining my relationship. help?

hi all, it’s j again. thanks for the advice on my last post—it was a mix of helpful, hilarious, and… well, a bit unsettling. but it gave me the push i needed to talk to l. here’s what happened:

i decided to man up and ask him out for a pint to clear the air. i figured it was the most normal thing to do. well, turns out l’s teetotal (thanks, y, for not warning me properly). when i suggested a pint, he just looked at me for a second and went, “i don’t drink, mate,” in that calm, terrifying way he has. i panicked, said something about tea, and left feeling like an absolute idiot.

but two days later, he called y at work and told her to invite me round to his place for tea. TEA. this man lives in a house that looks like it’s straight out of a Bond film, so you can imagine how intimidating it was to rock up with a packet of biscuits like some budget offering.

long story short, we had tea, and he cleared the air. he admitted he’d been giving me a hard time because he wanted to make sure i was serious about y. he said she’s like family to him (didn’t say “work spouse,” thank god), and he needed to know i’d treat her right. honestly, it was a bit awkward, but also kind of sweet.

so yeah, we’re good now. he even said he’d save me a seat for the next big race. i don’t know if that was a peace offering or a power move, but i’ll take it.

thanks for the push, reddit. you lot are mad, but in a good way. most of the time.

comments:

ladybantheboys: told you he was testing you! this is literally every rom-com ever. next step: you accidentally bond over an inside joke, and he becomes your biggest fan.

bananabreadbae: this is so british it hurts. “sorry i was mean, let’s have tea.” mate, at least you passed the test!

football4ever: called it! blokes like him just want to make sure you’re solid. now you’re in his good books, you’re set for life. congrats, mate.

memequeen420: so… what kind of biscuits did you bring? was it something boring like digestives, or did you go all out with hobnobs? we NEED to know.

randomuser_123: this is like when my dog hated my boyfriend at first but then they bonded over cheese. sometimes it just takes time.

tofu_throwaway: glad it worked out, but honestly, i’m still a bit scared of l. even through your post, he sounds like he could crush a man with a single stare.

iamnotanon: congrats on passing the test. now don’t mess it up, or i guarantee he’ll make you disappear. rich people have connections.

ultimategoblin69: you went to his house?! are you sure it wasn’t a trap? like, did he subtly scan your fingerprints for future blackmail material?

plshelpme1998: like, this whole thing is giving weirdly protective father vibes. good luck, mate.

user2847: what does his house smell like? no, seriously. i feel like rich people’s houses have that “old money” smell, like leather and expensive wood polish. was it intimidating?

(deleted): send feet pics.

opinionatedowl: so… when’s the wedding? i’m assuming l will walk her down the aisle now that you’ve been knighted into his inner circle.

thecheeseman: this is the most British solution ever. “i made you feel terrible, but here, have some earl grey, and now we’re mates.” glad it worked out though!

memequeen420 (again): STILL no answer on the biscuits. j, you’re avoiding the REAL questions here. were they branded or store-brand? did he eat one? this is important.

weirdcookieperson: did he sniff you when you walked in? like, does he have a heightened sense of smell? rich people are weird, man.

alphamale_uk: mate, you handled this all wrong. never apologise, never offer tea, and NEVER back down to another alpha. you should’ve walked in, sat in his chair, and asserted dominance. that’s how you gain respect. next time, bring steak, not biscuits. real men bond over meat, not tea.

j (op): l’s vegan, mate. bringing a steak would’ve been like waving a red flag at a bull. also, this isn’t Planet of the Apes, it’s just tea. chill.

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j (op): wow, i forgot how weird reddit is. for the record: branded hobnobs. because i’m not a monster. no sniffing, no fingertip scanning and i’ll get someone to update you if i go missing. cheers for the laughs.

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— all works taglist: @luvsforme @yelenasloverrrrr @donttouchthegnote @chelle1306 @bloodyymaryy @aliciaablueprint @km-23mr @stinkyjax @f1kenzzz @ctrlyomomma @theblueblub @23victoria @namgification @tallrock35 @avada-kedavra-bitch-187 @ariellovelynn @shhhchriss @lifeless-firefly @xylinasdiary @evie-119 @itseightbeats @landososcar @yongi-lee @velentine @m1892 @blushmimi @evans-dejong @nixisracing @lethalvenus @sainzluvrr @santanasaintmendes @idontknowlmaoo @sainzluvrr @tetetoni @ssprayberrythings @heavy-vettel @tashisgf @daniskywalkersolo @c-losur3 @lestappenslover @linoscrly (see yourself tagged when you don’t wanna be? or you want to be and don’t see yourself? send me an ask!)

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[mbrainspaz]

world politics are in the blender and so are countless human lives but for me this week I think getting my library copy of the new percy jackson book would stave off the darkness. Please library gods

[onceinawhilemoon]

The World Hinges on Small Details: Jon vs. Sherlock and The Hand-Me-Down Quest

This quest intrigues me so much. It not only raises questions about Jon's “nature”, but also gives us a glimpse of where Sherlock's focus on the small details, and therefore his struggle to see the big picture, came from.

If you're as intrigued by this quest as I am, read ahead, but before we continue, I highly encourage you to go read @spiteful-crow ‘s wonderful writeup on Jon and Sherlock and the Jungian concepts of “anima” and “persona” (here) if you haven't already. Not only does it explain a lot about them and what/who Jon is, but that analysis also serves as a pretty solid basis for most of this one, and it will help make it make sense, I hope!

Under the cut we go-

Quick recap of The Hand-Me-Down quest: Jon notices a first of three riddles engraved on top of a monument called “The Silver Hand” in Old City, and convinces Sherlock to solve them, saying that the riddles lead to a lost treasure. Sherlock is bewildered by how Jon was able to guess that something was on top of the monument in the first place but goes along with it. Eventually, instead of the treasure, they find a magnifying glass that belonged to Violet, buried under a rock. Sherlock is so confused by the discovery and has no clue as to how the glass made it there. Neither he nor Jon seem to remember ever burying it there.

The third riddle stands out the most here, as the last two lines of it read “you may find only one small detail, but that doesn't mean that you have failed.”

Upong finding this riddle, Jon commends Sherlock on his admirable ability to notice the details. This evokes Sherlock's memory of one of his mother’s core teachings:

S: “In such moments I often recall Mother's voice teaching us of the importance of the smaller details. The world hangs on small hinges, Jon.”

J: “Even the most chaotic miracle becomes sequential when you take a closer look. I remember.”

Sherlock’s keen eye for detail is something almost everyone he meets praises him for, and it's an inherited trait from his mother, who was an authenticator and a truth seeker, she taught him that "the truth lies in the details." Consequently, his struggle with seeing the big picture due to focusing too much on the details sometimes stems from his mother's teachings, which he clearly holds in very high regard. She was also the source of his strong moral stance against lies and obfuscation of truth. He was closer to his mother than his brother, even during her worst days. It's no surprise that Violet had a huge and deep influence on Sherlock-she shaped all of his moral views, many of which are being challenged by what he's discovering on Cordona.

The title of the quest, the quest being strongly tied to Violet and her teachings, specifically the third riddle, and of course the magnifying glass, all lead me to believe that Sherlock put the glass there and made up those riddles and the silver hand treasure, inspired by his mother, the monument, and the pirate it was erected in honor of.

Maybe it was also a ritual like burying Siger’s “skull” to help Sherlock process things and move on. Maybe it was to help him process and reconcile with the negative feelings associated with Violet's abusive nature or with her death, or maybe it was simply just child's play. But, as with everything else, after the pond incident™, his memories of Violet and most of his time on Cordona were suppressed and lost to time, including the magnifying glass and the “ritual”. And since Jon seems to remember or at least seems to have a gut feeling about the past and those lost memories, he recalled the riddles and the legend about the treasure, which, interestingly, can be considered as the “creative” aspects of the ritual. Jon may not have remembered the magnifying glass itself but remembered the steps to get there because Sherlock created them with his help. I do believe he is Sherlock's creativity and imagination personified. I've written a (much shorter, thankfully!) theory about that and how I think it's tied to Sherlock calling him his "anima" (here) if you're interested.

And maybe it was something more, if you think of Jon as a Tulpa or one of Carl Jung's thoughtforms (like Philemon, who Jung described as a "guru" possessing of transcendental knowledge and wisdom) this quest could be an example in which these concepts are explored. Jon does act as a guide in the game. He also seems to notice things before Sherlock does sometimes, and points out things that Sherlock has no way of knowing or verifying with empirical evidence at the time, sometimes even despite his physical limitations, like the “engraving” on top of the Silver Hand monument.

I personally don't think there was ever an engraving on top of the monument. I think the idea was for the first riddle to be memorized by Sherlock while the rest to be written down and hidden. This, I think, makes the whole “ritual” much more personal and special to Sherlock. Of course, after what happened, he forgot everything, and Jon was left to remember the first riddle and made it look like he read it on the monument to entice Sherlock to solve it and remember, just like how he invented the fiction that the skull belonged to Sherlock's father.

Then there's their conversation after discovering the glass, which I think perfectly captures the “rational” vs “irrational” parts of Sherlock, or the "persona" vs. the "anima" :

Jon, the “irrational” and creative part that wants to believe in magic and miracles, tells him that sometimes he just needs to let things happen, that some things can't be explained and we should let them be, and Sherlock, the "rational" part that strives for logic and objective truths, has a hard time accepting that, because to him, everything needs to have a logical explanation and a tangible root in reality.

J: “The whole world is one big unresolved chaotic miracle" - That's the part of Violet's teaching that Jon chooses to follow. Jon finds beauty in leaving mysteries unsolved, in the “who knows?” which leaves the door wide open for imagination, in non-linear thinking which leads to originality and uniqueness. He thrives in chaos.

S: “But they will become sequential if you take a closer look" - And that's the part that Sherlock wants to follow. He finds stability in order. He sees the need to investigate to uncover what's hidden and verify facts with evidence to restore structure into the world.

The two parts are both sides of the same coin. They shouldn't be separated because they balance each other out and make up one whole. Thanks to this balance, Sherlock eventually concedes and lets this particular mystery remain unsolved. It must have been freeing for him to just leave it to "fate" and focus on the beautiful feelings that this strange experience has evoked-him feeling closer to his mother by remembering her wisdom and honoring her legacy.

Which makes me wonder how differently Sherlock would have faced the horrors in The Awakened if Jon was still with him to hold his hand and remind him that it's okay if things didn't make sense, that sometimes you just need to let things happen and free your psyche from the weight of fervently searching for logical explanations. Some things are just meant to not make sense, just like that magnifying glass.

Then there's the title of the quest.

“The Hand-Me-Down” I think, refers either to the magnifying glass itself, being a precious heirloom inherited from Violet which later becomes Sherlock Holmes’ signature crime solving instrument, or the mindset of “the world hinges on small details“, also passed on from Violet and the reason why Sherlock is so keen on the details that he sometimes struggles to consider them within a broader perspective-the big picture-which can cause him to tunnel vision on isolated facts and possibly risk making ill-informed decisions. A notable example is concluding that “Richter tried to save my mother; therefore, he was an innocent man who was wrongly accused,” while disregarding the fact Richter and his medical malpractice caused his mother to deteriorate in the first place.

Finally, there's what Jon wrote in his diary after discovering the glass:

“But when Sherry looked at me through that glass, I was suddenly struck by terror. For a brief moment, it felt as if I weren't there at all, his gaze passing through me and over the horizon.”

Jon rarely gets “deep” in his journal, so this line stuck with me. Jon is pretty aware of his “non”-existence and even seems pretty in peace with it, so why would he be struck by terror at the idea of him “not being there at all”?

The choice of words in “his gaze passing through me and over the horizon” signifies the future; Jon is terrified of a future in which Sherlock doesn't see him anymore; when he favors his rational and mature side so much, that it ends up consuming him and severing Jon, his anima, his irrational and creative part that clings to his childhood, from the whole. If Sherlock stops seeing Jon, only then does Jon truly cease to exist.

I think this means that at this point in the story, deep down in his unconsciousness, Sherlock knew that when he leaves Cordona this time, he'll be leaving Jon with it, and this gut feeling, this terror at being fractured and fragmented, possibly with no way of ever getting mended, manifests through Jon as he constantly tries to alert Sherlock to the danger of the situation, that once he steps through the threshold, there's no turning back.

[shv2]

Long post, any commentary welcome

Okay confession time: I disliked Wander for years and now I'm realising that the only problem I have with him is that he is not called out on his bullshit/mistakes when it's really important.

I just feel like he is only shown as being in the wrong about small things. "He wants to help too much, even if people don't want it! He ignores his health to help others!"

But these are laughably small. Remindes me of when a person makes a character but they don't want to gives them any actual flaws so it's just "They are too kind/smart/etc".

Main problem (for me) is that Wander actually has big, intresting flaws with his character. But they are not explored. I cannot treat the episode about him trying to help people that are fine when. Everything else. I'm going to give 2 main examples that give me the most discomfort. You can skip if you understand.

1. Constant invasion of boundaries, to the point where "when he is a villain he deserves it" doesn't personally work for me. The entire fremergency episode.. Also the one where he and hater sang on stage. Why is he so weird about unconsious/not fully there Hater. He immediately makes him do/say things (in public or even on camera) that he would not say usually. Imagine someone you know is drunk so you take them in a public place to act like you are close while your buddy is filming that. I get Hater is a villain but damn... I'm not asking for a big callout or anything, can we at least not do the "it's so sad that he has to return :(" thing in the end.. Wander overstepping everyone's boundaries is so consistent it's a character trait, but it's mostly played for laughs/ignored/endorsed. It's not only villains... I remember this one animatic (scrapped/after credit scene, don't remember) where he pets Sylvia and his hand goes down to her tail so she has to physically stop him. Also a lot of other minor stuff, but.. I feel like this is more glaring than "oh he's just too sweet and kind".

2. The entire dominator.. Thing. Wander sees a trolley problem with the entire galaxy vs dominator (+hater stops being a villain), and decides he wants to save everyone. No matter how right you think he was, he did not achieve what he wanted. Dominator did not change. Hater did, but not complitely. But innocent people died. We can't just ignore that Hater has the power to stop Dominator, and one of the main reasons he didn't was because Wander was helping him out with Dominator. Look at Hater's face when Dominator laughs at his confession. He's not even surprised. He would 100% give up sooner if Wander wasn't hyping him up so much. Wander actually made sure that the only person capable of defeating Dominator was peaceful towards her for as long as he could. How many people lost their homes/died while him and Hater were busy with their crap? Again, I know this is a children's show. And yes, Wander is presented as being wrong, but un a really weird way. It's more about Dominator than her victims. It's more "Not everyone wants to change/be your friend/some people are just enemies" etc. The show shows (haha) that Wander was wrong, but the consequences are not in the picture. There are 2 elements to what happened: "Wander made the wrong call and many wrong decisions, AND many people died/lost their homes because of his decisions". The show only talks about the first part. It almost makes it look like if Dominator actually agreed to become friends, everything else would become okay.

Every time I rewatched the show I was thinking "Oh, yeah, this guy let countless people die because he wanted to solve the situation 100% ethically and gets away with it. Oh, he is very touchy without consent. Oh, he doesn't listen to his best friend and almost gets her killed. Oh, oh. Fuck this guy".

Now I think that it would be fine if it was adressed. There is no need to reduce/ignore his mistakes. Half of the main cast are villains (I personally consider (Wander, Sylvia, Hater and Peepers the main 4, people still love them. I love them! Not only that, we have Brad Starlight that satirises traditional heroes. Why doesn't the show apply at least some critical thinking towards Wander? Also, Sylvia is a hero too! She was a bounty hunter, she has anger management problems (where she is implied to hurt people in the way that a family friendly show can show (ep about the race)), she often "learns her lesson" if Wander is right.

Another thing.

Episodes where Wander is wrong are weirdly disconnected from the rest of the show in my opinion. At least it feels like it. It feels like tonal whiplash. One episode, Wander does something wrong - it's fine/haha funny. Other episode, Wander is W R O N G and needs to learn his lesson, also everything is extremely more on the nose. Try watching "The Fremergency Fronfract" right after "The Helper". Throughout 8 years I saw several people that had an opinion that these episodes felt really out of character for Wander, and I can understand where they are coming from. In my opinion, it's not Wander as a character, it's the lens through which we see him. Swapping from uncritical acceptance to critique feels unnatural to me.

Thinking of alternative scenarios/fanfiction makes me like Wander so much more. I think I can actually appreciate the guy so much more now. Everything I wrote was prompted by RWBY (+rewritten), because main team has the same problems Wander has times 1000.

I do hope that in season 3 they planned to explore Wander more (I remember seeing some tweets about it being the case), but I think that there is no way to adress this in season 3 without making it disconnect in many ways in some way from season 1 and 2.

[indigochromatic]

I sent this ask to someone else but I'd like to ask more systems - may I ask what your opinion is on subjective reality within systems? Systems that don't have consistency in the headspace, or a consistent timeline, consistent memories...that sort of thing. I'm struggling a bit with that now and it's really freaking me out :( so I'd love to hear your take, if you'd be willing

Hey there! Yeah for sure, we'll take a crack at this. First, though: Content warning for discussions of reality, subjective reality, unreality, etc. If too much that stuff makes your brain unhappy, maybe skim or skip this one.

I'm sorry to hear you're struggling a bit rn, Anon. It's not fun to feel like you don't have "solid ground to stand on", and having to deal with not having a consensus about your autobiographical narrative can be really frustrating and scary.

Lemme try to come at this from a couple angles. First off, I'll say something about how we think of big-picture philosophy, which is that everyone has a subjective reality to some extent. There's a reason it's called "consensus reality" not "objective reality", and that's because no two people on earth are having the exact same experience. Perception is biased, memories slowly alter every time they're recalled, interpretation differs wildly depending on context. The human brain isn't an accurate recording device, it's a pile of synapses telling stories to itself in the dark.

So what do we do with that? Philosophically, that's a big question, and I'm not gonna pretend I have all that figured out. Learn to yourselves stories that give your life meaning and purpose. Practically speaking, though? That'll depend on what you're struggling with specifically, and what you're hoping to change.

For example, let's take memory consistency. The two of us have generally pretty consistent memories (e.g. we agree on what events happened rather than having conflicting memories about it), but we also have a shit memory overall--we've described it like we're living in a sliding window of 2-8 days, and everything else is kind of a mess since around 2019-2020. We also have ADHD, so that doesn't help either. What do we do? Honestly, just super basic stuff like "keep a calendar notebook that we write stuff down in to keep track of it, and don't worry if it's not perfect or fully complete", "set alarm reminders for non-routine things we don't want to miss, like medical appointments or phone calls with friends", and "check in with each other when we can, to ask if we're missing anything (and just to say hey)". We also know our memory is affected by our overall dissociation levels, so just generally trying to take care of ourselves and slowly improve our life situation is pretty likely to help, too.

On headspace consistency, though--I'm actually a little confused by what you're asking. Are you worried because your headspace isn't static and changes a lot? Anon, with love, that shit is so common, I wouldn't be worried about it in the slightest. Our headspace is a whole mess, for instance--not only is it different based on whether you're in "my mind" vs "L's mind", even the small handful of semi-consistent places and/or 'themes' change around all the time, not just day-to-day like the weather but also evolving over time, especially as we learn more and process more stuff and experience more things. Hell, my exomemories don't even all have a consistent continuity. And even the "semi-consistent" aspects of our headspace basically exists in a sort of...Schrodinger's Headspace superposition, most of the time? For example, there's a whole, like, Hades/The Spirit Realm in there--except when it doesn't exist, or when it's wrapped into some other part of headspace, or retroactively never existed, or was all just symbolic anyways, or is personified in one of my facets instead, or...well, you get the idea. If you're looking to create a bit more solidity in your headspace, it's usually possible to develop more 'concrete' headspace locations by practicing visualization over time--this can be guided meditation stuff, writing about it, collecting a moodboard of images, constructing a model of it in minecraft or another "virtual space-builder" game/program/whatever, etc. Don't be discouraged if it doesn't happen overnight, this stuff can take a bit of practice to solidify.

Timeline consistency: yeah. That one can be especially hard to avoid when you have between-system-member amnesia in general, and/or multiple periods over your life where there were different main fronters. We're not experts on this front, but a lot of it, as far as we can tell, tends to come down to just...trusting each other, as a system. You've all got pieces of the puzzle, and some folks' pieces are written in map coordinates while other folks have cryptic, symbolic riddles--they're all important pieces, even when they conflict. And sometimes you have to kinda let go of trying to ever Perfectly Reconstruct Exactly What Happened, and focus more on what you want your life to look like now and moving forward. Not sure if that system member's exomemories are 'purely symbolic/emotional' or have some basis in physical events? Ask them how they want to deal with it, and what support they want. Sometimes the narrative is more important than the events, because the events themselves are gone. They're over. What we carry with us--everyone, systems and singlets--is the narrative we've told ourselves about the events, and that's the part that grows and changes with us throughout our lives.

Anyways, that's my take on it. Hopefully this gets at a bit of what you were asking about, Anon? Feel free to toss us followup questions if you want, thanks for the opportunity to talk about all this a little. -S

[moomingitz]

Been thinking about this recently, when it comes to how people have view games in the Sonic franchise and their expectations of them even all the way back in the 2000s. I honestly believe the price the games originally retailed for has a lot to do with it. I'm saying this as someone who came in late to play the most prominent "dark age" Sonic games, and the games that came after them. And I'm only referring to the console games here, not the handheld ones.

The first time I played Sonic 06 was back in 2013. I bought it brand new and still sealed for $10, and I did it because I wanted to get an actual informed opinion of the game, and as a strange curiosity in general. The game is definitely unfinished and very buggy. However, I did get some enjoyment from it(even if not for the intended reasons), I actually liked the cutscenes for most of the part, and I do see some redeeming qualities underneath it's scuffed to hell surface. But, again, I only paid $10 for it, so not really a loss for me. But when it originally came out, it was not only $60, it was also this big grand anniversary game, meant to be a drastic new direction and refresh of the franchise, and it was released on then-next gen consoles. So I think you can start to see a more full picture of what I'm trying to get at, here.

Same thing also applies to the games that I think are good, or at least better. Sonic 06 wasn't the only Sonic game I played for the first time around that time. Before 06, I bought and played Colors in late 2012 for around $15. While I still believe that it's a good game, it's very short and doesn't have much else to do after you beat the main story. I don't think it has enough content to justify the price it originally retailed for.

The lack of a significant amount of content offered outside of the base games is honestly why I miss games like Sonic Adventure 1 and 2. Whether these games have actually aged well or not, there was so much you could do on the side. I would play these games religiously growing up, wanting to find and unlock everything I could do. I even %100 completed SA2 at one point. Sonic Adventure gives you hub worlds to explore and mess around in, and the Gamecube port even gives you the Gamegear games to unlock. In SA2 you could unlock costumes/skins for characters in 2 Player VS. mode and unlock other characters to play in it, among other things you could also unlock by completing missions and getting emblems. SA2 even had a timed boss rush. And, of course, both games had the Chao gardens.

It might be something of a meme to demand the Chao Gardens make a return. But fans, me included, want them back for a very good reason. Not only is it fun and relaxing to raise Chao and customize them to your liking, but the Chao gardens incentivize you to replay stages in order to find things like certain small animals to use for your Chao, or to scrounge up rings to buy things at the market.

As someone who played both Sonic Adventure games, when both their Dreamcast and following Gamecube ports originally came out, I really do feel like both the base games, and the amount of content provided outside of them, made them worth the price tag they had during their initial releases. The only games that have been able to scratch that kind of itch for me afterward is Unleashed and Generations. And before anyone asks; I can't comment on Frontiers gameplay wise because I still haven't played it yet.

[irlcats-bracket]

Bracket 3 Semifinals 1

Pricetag & Bandit vs Simon

PRICETAG

also named price in another submission

shes fat shes a terrible bitch and shes the love of submitter's life. they dont technically know her breed but she looks like a calico kinda. white and black and brown all over. their favorite spot to kiss her is the little brown diamond on top of her head, but she has all kinds of pretty markings. she'll cuddle submitter but not their parents and hisses at anyone else. hence the bitch. its SO funny. she doesnt "meow" so much as she chirps and yells. u touch her n its the worlds loudest MRAP. submitter leaves for work and they go "bye price!" and she goes "meep" and they say "i love you!" and she goes "mow" and it always makes them smile because she rarely does it to anyone else. shes so fat. she has a big ol premidorial pouch because shes 100% indoor and u can hear her claws go clicclicclic on the floor because shes so heavy. she likes to climb on peoples back. she chases moths but no other bugs and likes to make friends with neighborhood critters. she hates bellyrubs from everyone but submitter. if they leave their door open at night she creeps in and lays in the worst possible spot and makes it impossible to sleep. she makes the best bread loaf. shes so fucking round. SPHEREICAL. submitter love her more then anything ❤❤❤❤❤❤ (here submitter said that i can shrink it if i want to but no fucking way i am shrinking things abt a cat aside from their name maybe)

shes named after a canadian hockey player. submitter hates hockey. thanks uncle C dhsbdjjsjsjsjs

PROPAGANDA

THATS MY FUCKING CAT!!!!

GO VOTE FOR MY CAT!!!!!

how could you possibly vote against this face 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 shes the roundest, bitchiest cat in the whole world and shes my best friend. stealer of cream cheese and hearts.

heres a small collection of price pictures where i think she looks exceptionally round

vote for price orb. shes practically a perfect circle. what more could you want

also look how polite she is

BANDIT

submitter's sweet baby boy. He passed away recently, and submitter misses him dearly. He was the softest cat they'd ever pet, and that's not just them being biased. His fur was silk. He was the friendliest cat too, and when he heard new voices he was always up to come meet people. He also enjoyed being around people, and you could always find him in a room with the family. He enjoyed terrorizing the family dog whenevr he got riled up (dont worry, she enojoyed it too), and he loved to bother submitter's parents when they started working from home. Any call submitter had with their folks, he would always make a background appearance, yelling quite loudly. He also had some of the loudest snoring theyve ever heard, and they're so lucky to have a small audio recording of him sleeping. Submitter had him since they were 8, and he was nearly 17 years old when he passed away. Submitter tries to sleep with a crook in their knee so if he's ever lonely, he can come cuddle.

SIMON

he's two years old but still looks like he's six months old. he also recently cost his father and submitter 4k because he likes to eat random stuff off the ground :) luckily he's adorable, loves to beat them all up in the morning to wake us up, and his little meows sound like, "ba-hoo!"

PROPAGANDA

he is scared of everything that is not his mom, dad, or brother. everything else is to be treated as an very scary, dangerous enemy

he once cost us over 4,000 dollars in vet bills because he loves to try to eat random stuff off the ground. my fiancé and i both work minimum wage so you can imagine how happy we were

he went missing for 15 hours once because he pushed through a window screen and jumped. he is the last cat who would ever willingly go outside so wtf simon ....

he is a gremlin who thinks the world revolves around him (it does)

he loves letting me dress him up in hats, dresses, and shirts!

he loves to lick my fiancés face at 5am and will dig up the covers to get to him

he helps himself to any glass of water left out, even if you're also drinking it

he doesn't understand why people aren't always willing to share their food with him- he wants some!! give him a lil taste!

he also sat like this once ?

anyways i reached the mobile photo limit i hope you like my boy!!

SIMON SWEEP

[lailuhhh]

Trick or treat!!!

Okay okay okay so like

I don’t think I’ve gone into detail but new series idea called Mac vs Mother Nature where it’s literally Mac nearly being taken out by natural disasters and I like need ideas

I’ve already got earthquake, tsunami, and tornado. Even small things like animal attacks or allergies because that would be silly amongst the big things

Like I don’t have anything written for any of them and it’s literally just the words MAC VS MOTHER NATURE in my notes and that makes me remember everything

But PLEASE listen to Owl City’s The Tornado and picture Mac hiding in a storm drain, alone, while everyone else is safe in a tornado shelter and imagine Jack going completely feral because phones don’t work, coms don’t work, there’s a literal tornado outside, and he had no idea where Mac is and can’t find him the first day of searching and he’s running himself into the ground with worry because Mac’s not there Mac’s not there Mac’s not there— he doesn’t even take into account his own injuries because Mac’s. Not. There. and I dunno maybe he passes out and wakes up in the hospital and Is Mac There? Who knows at this point. Maybe Mac is literally up on the wind lol

[ashboy-3]

Nice to Meet You

Written for DannyMay day 5 Prompt: 10 min vs 1 hour Fandom: Danny Phantom Charcters: Jack, Maddie, Danny, OC Words: 2242 Summary: It's time for Danny to move into college and meet his roommate.

This is where the Ten minutes starts.

“You sure you don’t need us to come with you?” Maddie asked her only son as he was packing his essentials into a duffel bag and backpack.

“No Mom. We already sent everything else ahead in the mail. I can fly there easily,” Danny grabbed his favorite hoodie and put it in the duffel bag, following a Fenton thermos.

“Oh okay, sweetie. You know I worry,” Maddie hugged her half-ghost child.

“Yeah I know, but I promise I’ll be fine. You and Dad built this awesome bracelet that hides my ecto signature so I can fly the whole way and the GIW can’t find me. That’s really all that I’m worried about.” Danny said as he waved his wrist that held a black and ecto green bracelet. It was cleverly disguised as a simple rope bracelet with a small ghost charm in the middle of it. That charm was the key to hiding his ecto signature from those who might be trying to find him for very bad reasons.

Once he was done packing he looked up to see his mom’s face still free of worry. Sighing he sat down on his bed, letting her join him. “I’ll be fine. It’s just college.” Danny smiled grabbing her hands.

“I know I should worry. You’ve already accomplished so much! Saving the world, becoming a prince of the realms, and graduating high school all on your own. I shouldn’t worry,” a few tears were about to come out of her eyes.

“I didn’t do any of that alone. I had Jazz, Sam, Tucker, and even Ellie. I had Clockwork, Frostbite, Ember, Dora, and all the ghosts. I had a big support system helping me and they still help me to this day. I wouldn’t be anywhere without all of them. Even my enemies. I’m grateful for everyone in my life who has challenged me and helped me get here.” Danny told her, as he looked at the pictures of his friends and family, the last things he has to pack.

“Oh, you’re right. You will be coming to visit right?” she asked, standing up to carefully pick up each picture as she smiled at how happy her son was in all of them.

“Of course I will. Jazz still came to visit when she left for college,” Danny pointed out.

“Jazz didn’t have as many responsibilities as you do,” Maddie also pointed out.

This is where the ten minutes ended (Words 401). This is where the next fifty minutes start.

“She was still going for a hard course,” Danny voiced for Jazz.

“Oh I know she did and we knew she was going to do excellent. Maybe I am worrying to much,” Maddie thought as her husband entered the room.

“Of course you are! Our Danny has got this! If he needs anything he knows to call us!” Jack smiled.

“Thanks, Dad!” Danny smiled.

“Now here’s some vials of ectoplasm to keep you going in California, call us when you need replacements. This is for the trip there,” Jack gave him a case of twenty vials of pure ectoplasm and a water bottle filled with ectoplasm.

“Thanks, Dad. I really should get going,” Danny said as he looked at his complicated watch that was on the opposite wrist of his bracelet, his right wrist, and put the vials in the duffle bag while the water bottle went into the backpack pocket.

“Call us as soon as you get there!” Maddie demanded with one more tight hug.

“I promise Mom. As soon as I find my dorm and settle in I’ll give you a call,” Danny smiled.

“Make sure you stay invisible-”

“Unless I’m above the clouds. I know Dad,” Danny gave Jack just as tight of a hug, before taking a deep breath and grabbing the two bags, the weight practically nothing for him after training with Frostbite and the other ghost for over two years now.

“Bye, Danny!” Maddie yelled as she saw her son flying away outside of his bedroom window.

“He’ll be okay Mads,” Jack gave his wife a comforting hug.

“I don’t doubt it,” Maddie smiled.

It took half a day of flying at his top speed but Danny was able to make it to California without stopping, but he was dead tired on his feet by the time he arrived. Making sure to turn back human where no one could see he found a desk that clearly said freshman here for info.

“Hi there! Freshman?” a girl with short blond hair asked.

“Uh yeah. Daniel Fenton.”

“Daniel? Nice to meet you! I’m Christy! I’m a senior here, have been for three years, but let’s see. . .aha! Here you are! Your dorm building is Castle 2, it’s going to be this building right here,” she handed him a map of the school, circling the building and where they currently are. “You are going to be on floor three room 313. If you have any trouble finding what you need to know just look for someone wearing one of the Freshman shirts like I have on. We’re all over campus. This is a list of activities that we are putting on for the freshman the week before school to help get you introduced to others on campus. This is a log of when all the separate tours are starting, they all start at student services, this building here. This is a calender of not only the school semester, but also the main events that have already been planned along with a list of the clubs, the fees, and when they meet. Oh almost forgot! When you get to castle 2 at the entrance their will be another freshman worker, she should have your dorm keys! Have a great day!”

“Thanks!” Danny smiled back as saw the building was a short two minute walk. Just as Christy said their was another person with the same shirt, just a different color sitting at the entrance.

“Hey there! This your dorm room?” the guy asked.

“Yep! Name’s Daniel Fenton?” 

“Daniel let’s see found ya. My name’s Jack I’ll be your RA so if you have any problems or anything you can knock on my door. I’m in room 225. Here are your keys and student ID! Enjoy your freshman year and if you ever need to find me I’m normally doing homework at the local coffee shop after four!”

“Thanks, man and you can call me Danny.” Danny held out his hand, which Jack gladly shook.

“Nice to meet you, Danny!”

Danny walked up to the third floor, finding room 313, and unlocked it.

“Oh my shit!” a person who was in the room already jumped up and yelled when they saw Danny enter the room.

“Sorry man! Didn’t know there was already someone in here,” Danny was quick to apologize, he really didn’t mean to frighten his roommate.

“No, it’s my fault. I knew I had a roommate, but it didn’t occur to me when I saw the key turning. Name’s Parker. Pronouns they/them.” Parker said, holding out their hand.

“Danny. he/him/thing/gremlin,” Danny took the hand as Parker laughed.

“I’ll keep note of that. So I’m a freshman. I’m an English major, yeah don’t yell at me. I’m doing multiple languages, the school only offers English and Spanish as official majors though,” Parker rolled their eyes, as he jumped on his bed to lie down, he was already moved in. Danny looked over and saw that his stuff had already arrived and the school was kind enough to move it in for him.

“Do you like languages?” Danny asked.

“Hell yeah. I hope to be a translator for as many languages as I can. This school is the one in California that offered the most. I’m taking the normal English and Spanish classes for my major. I’m also going to take ASL, Latin, Russian, French, Japanese, and Chinese.”

“Damn! I thought that I knew a lot of languages,” Danny laughed.

“I don’t know that many actually. I only know some Spanish and I’m fluent in Italian. Everything else I just know a few phrases here and there. I’m also going to be joining all of the language clubs so theirs more to learn. What languages do you know?”

“I know Esperanto, Latin, Greek, Hebrew, Egyptian, Old Norse-. Sorry nothing that’s really helpful. Their kinda all dead languages,” Danny rubbed his neck as he walked fully in the room, shutting the door behind him to put his bags down on his bed. Seeing that he was given his own closet and furniture.

“No dude that’s awesome! Where did you learn those?” Parker asked, amazement in their eyes, Danny suddenly remembered the grueling training he had and still has to go through the become king. Memorizing every dead language that is spoken within the realms. He also speaks ghostly speak, but that one can’t be explained.

“I had a few friends teach me. I know people who needed to learn all of these languages and so to help them I would learn it with or for them for easier communication.” Danny shrugged.

“Man hook me up with your friends. Well, at least we have Latin in common. Are you going to take the course?”

“Ah maybe. I’m a science major, astrophysics to be exact. I don’t think language will exactly be helping me a lot,” Danny shrugged, opening the box that he knew had his bedding stuff in it. Smiling as he set up his bed as talked with Parker.

“Man, and I thought my major was going to be hard.”

“It’s not that hard. I come from a family of scientists so the vocabulary isn’t exactly foreign to me, but if you ever need help with your language classes I’m a quick learned,” Danny smiled, happy that his bed was made. He still had plenty to unpack but he was to tired to worry about it right now.

“Do you mind if I leave the boxes here for now? I’m tired as the dead,” Danny laughed at his own inside joke.

“Nah I don’t mind. Did you drive?”

“I flew. It was a long flight. I don’t think it was supposed to be that long, but delays,” Danny shrugged.

“Alright. I’ll leave for some coffee, while you get some sleep. We can work out dorm rules and shit later,” Parker suggested.

“Oh shit yeah! Don’t let me forget dude. Although I’m pretty easy. Just respect my privacy and don’t fuck with my stuff,” Danny shrugged, grabbing a baggy long sleeve shirt and sweat pants from his bag, happy that their dorm room had a shared bathroom.

“No arguments here. Want anything while I’m out?” Parker asked.

“Nah. If I need anything I can get it later,” Danny waved him off as he walked in the bathroom to change, hearing the dorm room door open and close indicating Parker’s absence.

Although Danny was super tired he wanted to unpack the ghost supplies from his bag as quickly as possible. Grabbing his water bottle, the ecto one and not the one filled with normal water, he put them both on his side table, the ecto one was marked with a piece of green tape and had danger written on it in black sharpie. It made Danny laugh. He then proceeds to put the vials in the top drawer of his dresser, only unpacking enough clothes to hide the vials, should someone accidentally go looking. 

He repeated the process with the other drawers in his dresser, making sure to cover up anything that could be considered weird.

Now that he was done putting away his important items he could nap peacefully. Setting an alarm to go off in time for the latest freshman tour he let his mind fall into peaceful sleep.

Danny awoke to his alarm going off beeping like crazy, he was very grateful he grew out of throwing or blasting his alarms.

“Hey dude your alarm is going off,” Parker said, when Danny opened his eyes he could see his roommate sitting at his desk.

“Yeah I know. I wanted to catch the last freshman tour,” Danny yawned, grabbing his favorite black and green ghost hoodie to change into. . .maybe letting Sam revamp his whole wardrobe to be ghost themed wasan’t the best idea, but he can’t deny that he didn’t vibe with it.

“Oh shit I was going to catch that,” Parker groaned.

“I don’t mind you tagging along. Might as well get used to each other,” Danny shrugged as he came out of the bathroom.

“Bet,” Parker agreed, quickly turning off his laptop and grabbing a brown shoulder bag.

The two walked together as they headed towards student services learning alot about each other, or at least the basic things that new roommates should know about each other.

“Man this campus is bigger then I thought,” Parker groaned as they finally made it to student services.

“It wasan’t that long of a walk,” Danny laughed.

“Says you! I’m not a sports guy!” Parker groaned, ready to flop on the ground.

“Neither am I, but I like to keep in shape,” Danny patted Parker on the back comfortingly as he continued to laugh.

The two went on the tour, making sure to mark the buildings that they would need know on their own maps before being let go, deciding that the best way to end the night was a trip to Denny’s for some late night milkshakes.

“Yeah,” Danny thought. “College to going to be awesome!”

(Work was completed under the time limit with 5:42 left to complete. words written in this time was 1841. The total amount of words for the work is 2242.)

Since this is the intro fic for Parker and I couldn’t think of a description during the challenge. Parker has dirty blonde hair and blue eyes with a rounded face. Their a little on the heavier side, but that changes as he starts to exercise more. They like to wear button up shirts that have goofy patterns with jeans. Their hair is cut in a mullet with the sides shaved down. They have their ears pierced.

[kylesvariouslistsandstuff]

Spidey, Sony, Etc.

The numbers are in.

SPIDER-MAN: ACROSS THE SPIDER-VERSE opened with a truly spectacular $120m. This makes it one of the biggest domestic opening weekends for an animated feature in North America, only behind... CGI LION KING ($191m), INCREDIBLES 2 ($182m), SUPER MARIO BROS. ($146m), FINDING DORY ($135m), FROZEN II ($130m), SHREK THE THIRD ($122m), and TOY STORY 4 ($120.9m).

That's also $85m more than what INTO THE SPIDER-VERSE opened with. Like I said in an earlier post, this joins the leagues of films like TERMINATOR 2, AUSTIN POWERS 2, SHREK 2, INCREDIBLES 2, and a few others... Where the original did either well enough or was a small sleeper hit, and the sequel just straight up exploded. Really shows what kind of staying power the first film had after its initial run... And I knew it way back when, too, because the first SPIDER-VERSE had incredible legs. It wall-crawled its way to $190m domestic off of that okay $35m opening, a rare 5x multiplier! I predicted around $90m for the opening weekend at the end of this past year, but I'm happy to be way off on that...

So... Sony Pictures Animation has a few films laid out, some of which are theatrical, some of them aren't (such as K-POP: DEMON HUNTERS, which is being directed by Maggie Kang and Chris Appelhans). SPIDER-MAN: BEYOND THE SPIDER-VERSE is the only movie with a concrete release date, which is currently March 29, 2024.

In the works are the aforementioned DEMON HUNTERS, a SPIDER-VERSE movie lead by female characters, along with a 2D Genndy Tartakovsky-directed raunchy dog comedy called FIXED, an animated GHOSTBUSTERS movie that's reportedly circling 2025, an adaptation of the graphic novel BUBBLE, TUT from HAIR LOVE director Matthew A. Cherry, TAO from director Emily Dean, and another Tartakovsky project called BLACK KNIGHT.

FIXED seems to be far along, if not done, and its first look will be given at Annecy in a matter of days. I'm hoping we get a release date for this picture, and a few others, but at this point, it looks like FIXED will be hitting theaters some time next year. Tartakovsky told a fan on his Instagram that FIXED was aiming for theaters, instead of being a streamer title. K-POP, on the other hand, is a streamer title - which kind of bums me out. The premise sounds so cool and fun, and because it's a post-SPIDER-VERSE Sony Animation movie... I think we'll be in for something really unique and dynamic.

Sony Animation also gave us the Lord and Miller-produced THE MITCHELLS VS. THE MACHINES, a real visual blast and a fun ride from top to bottom, a film that would've looked fantastic on a big screen, but couldn't go there because we were still in the early years of the pandemic. Release it now, and it'd maybe have a chance of making a suitable enough gross. There was also VIVO, WISH DRAGON, and the fourth HOTEL TRANSYLVANIA... SPIDER-VERSE Deux would've shared last year with HOTEL, but it was so gargantuan that it had to move almost a year away... I'm glad they took their time, given what I witnessed this past Friday afternoon.

And it all made sense, really... I was wondering why Sony Animation were so mum on when their future movies were coming out. I was like, "FIXED looks done! Or close to done? Why no date?" ACROSS THE SPIDER-VERSE, and its followup, were such Herculean efforts. We're hearing more and more about what kind of technical and artistic wizardry real went into this movie, such as the multiple framerates on one single character (Spider-Punk)... It's like, yeah, no wonder... They seemed like all hands on deck movies, and that everything else needed to be put aside for a brief second.

FIXED is an exception, though, as that is/was being animated at Renegade Animation. Some Sony Animation movies aren't done at the Sony Imageworks unit in Vancouver, sometimes other venues work on those movies. WISH DRAGON was a Chinese co-production with a number of studios, and THE STAR was done up at Cinesite. To name a few examples...

Maybe come next week, we'll hear what's up with FIXED and K-POP: DEMON HUNTERS. Keep in mind, Sony Animation also launched a TV series with AGENT KING a little while ago, and YOUNG LOVE - based on HAIR LOVE - is around the corner. The plate is full.

So... Congrats SPIDER-VERSE Two! Makes me wonder how much higher BEYOND will open. Given the various dismayed reactions to the film being over, as opposed to *what happened* in the final 10 minutes, I think it has a chance to get an ENDGAME-style bump. Sometimes, when a sequel opens so big, the third one kinda dips a little... I don't think that will be the case with BEYOND... It could even challenge CGI LION KING for the top opening weekend gross for an animated movie... I'd love to see it.

Also quite neat that the two biggest openings of 2023 are animated movies... MARIO with $146m, and now this with $120m... Right behind is MCU entry GUARDIANS OF THE GALAXY VOL. 3 with $118m. Which also has a lot of animated characters and animated VFX in it. With the strong reception it has, I can see this easily getting a 3-3.5x multiplier, and making its way to $400m domestic, and perhaps double that worldwide... With that, it would become Sony Animation's highest grossing production, dethroning the live-action/animated SMURFS movie that made around $563m back in 2011. Surreal to think that that film has remained their biggest picture, but if we're going to go with all-animated movies... HOTEL TRANSYLVANIA 3 would be tops with $528m worldwide.

Most importantly, it's quite beloved already, a film that has blown minds. INTO THE SPIDER-VERSE caught the world by surprise, and this animated Spider-Man movie eventually won a lot of hearts over, hence this opening so big. Like I said before, I feel this is a watershed moment for animated features...

Not dissimilar to how plenty of adult audiences showed up in droves for the early run of Disney Renaissance animated movies. Or how Pixar and early DreamWorks/PDI films scored huge numbers circa the late '90s/early '00s. Or how we saw more blockbuster heavies in the 2010s like TOY STORY 3, FROZEN, and INSIDE OUT. It continues to prove that a lot of the public likes animation quite a bit, and will shell out hard-earned money to see these films in theaters. I know people will say "But it's still Spider-Man, it's Marvel, it's a well-known IP." Yes, that's correct... But plenty of adults could've said "What? Why is there a Spider-Man CARTOON now?" I feel INTO THE SPIDER-VERSE had a lot to prove, and it did, hence those excellent legs. Anyways, yeah, adults show up to cartoons...

Too bad the heads who don't pay the filmmakers, or those who run prestigious centers celebrating film... don't give the medium much respect, can't or absolutely refuse see that...

But the public says otherwise, and that's what matters to me. The popular vote vs. a very biased electoral college.

[yuzu-balignon]

Collections testing phase feedback

Good timezone fine folks !

I figured it was time to send you feedback about my use of collections over the last two weeks. It will of course not be exhaustive and I might come back to add more at a future time. I will cover what I liked the most about it, intended vs emergent uses, and finally some enhancements and suggestions.

Key takeaways

I’ll go into everything into more details. But in my opinion, Collections are a formidable tool, perfectly in line with the Tumblr spirit, and get excited about content on the platform. However, I think they are hard to leverage to advertise Tumblr at medium and large scale.

Overall it’s a great feature with plenty of fun and useful potential, although possibly not for what was envisioned.

1. Overall experience - Highlights

First, setting aside technical considerations : the whole thing is performant and easy to navigate and pretty instinctive. It is well designed and engineered, and integrate smoothly with the rest of Tumblr’s ecosystem. Well done !

I really like that you can mix tags and blogs, it really brings variety to a collection. Although correct me if I’m wrong, it seems that blogs are kinda prioritized over tags ? I’m uncertain about that.

The grid view !!! Listen this is one of my favourite features on Tumblr. I think it allow to grasp the incredible variety of Tumblr in just a glimpse. The option should be everywhere, even on the dash tmho. If you even care.

Back on track, here are other things I like : customisation (picture, description), the explain popup when you share to another user, the random ids to prevent accidental discovery. The fact that tags from the collection are highlighted ! All of this comes together and make me say “yeah I understand why I see that, and why it is relevant to me”

2. Intended VS emergent use

Here I must say I am under an assumption : one of the goal of the feature is to boost Tumblr’s attractivity for non-users, by showcasing them user-curated content. This assumption is based on the labs post (this one), specifically the parts that say “Focus on introducing people [...] or recommending stuff” “think of who you would send […] to”. I understand that this is not the only purpose of the feature, but I tried to pay attention to this during my tests.

What Collections were very good for

Making yourself custom lists of blogs / even tag packs, ie custom timelines. Useful for “curating Tumblr around my many interests”, as said in the above post

Showcasing individual friends : by targeting specifically their interests, I had a few friends consider signing up for Tumblr. Not sure if they will but they were delighted

What Collections were not very good for

Keep up to date with <thing>. Now big grain of salt I should probably test this more, plus it may not be related to collections but to tag indexing, etc etc. But it felt like latest posts were not displayed on Collections, even though they were showing on tag pages

Showcase Tumblr to a group of people. If you don’t have an audience around a very specific topic, I find it hard to make it broad and interesting at the same time. My opinion is that Collections are not the ideal tool for that

To sum it up : I don’t think Collections are a scalable social tool. They work really well for targeted, personalised uses (you, a friend, a small group of people)

It could work if you already have a big platform on another media. (I planned to use it for a fandom event I’m hosting on Twitter+Tumblr, but since it seemed not up to date enough I postponed posting the link)

3. Enhancements

Here are some thoughts I had while using Collections. I know that some of these are already in the pipeline, but hey that's free validation :)

Fixes

Nothing more than what I already reported ! Maybe the up-to-date part, but I’m not confident enough to call it a bug, maybe just a lack of understanding

Must have / MLP

A save button, to quickly access a collection made by somebody else (because you may not want to follow all these people)

A way to quickly access it from your dash : either a list in the sidebar (like the sideblog list) or as a tab like “For you” and “your tags”

Nice to have

A clone button, so you can create a copy and edit it quickly

A report button, for collections with harmful content (e.g. it could be used to make easier to find illegal content on Tumblr)

A page/article/tooltip to explain a bit what is in a collection mix. Are tags or blogs prioritised ? Is it fully chronological & exhaustive ? It kinda lack transparency on this point

Ideas

If the goal is “showcase cool content to outside”, then maybe a static collection of posts would be more fitted for 100% predictability. You can technically do that with a sideblog. Also it’s similar to @todayontumblr

Collabs ! I think Collections have a lot of potential as “ask for recommendations”. When Collections are rolled out, you could send asks to a few influential blogs and ask them about a topic. A few examples to illustrate : ask theme developer for a collection for people who want to learn css, ask a vibe blog what tag they follow, ask a gimmick blog for a collection of other gimmick blogs… I intend to do that when more people have access to it !

This post is way too long I am so sorry good luck and thanks for your work <3

[dog99a9]

Dog vs human

It's been almost 10 days since I started fostering this dog. I'm entirely new to the whole owning a dog thing -- any dog, let alone a rescue dog. So, every single thing that happened, good or bad, felt like a teaching lesson. The last 10 days have really taught me a lot more than all these years dealing with people. No, seriously. Spending time with this little doggy dog made me more human than ever. Let me tell you why.

The first time I saw the fostering program ad for this dog was two months ago. I didn't put too much thought into it other than, huh, what a poor little dog. He did look happy in the pictures, though. But I can't adopt or foster him. I didn't even know how, didn't have the skills. I don't own the place that I currently live in, so any damages caused by the dog would've been incurred by me. And I live alone -- who's gonna help me to take care of the dog if I am not available?

Then days passed and I kept seeing the ad on my social feed. This same dog. Same happy face. No one decided to keep him yet. Days turned to weeks and the ad was still there. A little bit of a background, but this dog is a Shiba and it has a reputation for being an impossible breed to train and to behave nicely. Added to the fact that this is a rescue dog, which means they might have an underlying issue as to why they're abandoned and rescued in the first place.

It really did remind me of myself. The feeling of being unwanted. People would look at you and say "pass" based on their judgment or the lack thereof, though it's perfectly fair to do so. Those days when I just wished that someone would just give me a chance.

So I decided, fuck it, I'm going to be a foster for him. And it's not like it'll last forever. It's just a month -- I can feed him, give him love for a month. Even if they're going to misbehave, I can handle one month of misbehavior. At least I'm proving my point: If I can make someone, anyone, feel less unwanted, I'd consider that a win.

And there I was, signing up and got accepted.

---

The first day with him was really fun. He seemed relaxed, obedient... barely resembling a rescue dog. It's like someone else's dog who has been with them for a long time. Of course he had the occasional zoomies tendency but I figured it's normal for this kind of dog.

Over the days, he was slowly getting... aggressive. Frequent barks at the smallest noises from outside of my door, unwillingness to listen to any commands, furniture bites, aggressiveness towards any other dogs... One time he went on to bite a smaller dog like it's a rabbit. Luckily the smaller dog was okay.

I felt betrayed. This isn't the dog that was advertised. He'd look all happy in the ad but turned into this house-wrecking tiny goblin that is out of control. And the worst part is I didn't know how to handle it. At all. I'd be sitting on a couch frustrated after yelling "no!" a million times to the very thing I told him not to do. There was one time when I tried to put a harness on him for 2 hours... I tried treats, toys, calming him down, but instead he'd run around, bit the harness, bit my hand, simply escaped the harness.

I'd then lashing it out to the rescue shelter contact person. About how untrainable and uncontrollable this dog is. The person was unfortunately not the best one to deal with this situation as well, as she's suggesting all these generic instructions on how to deal with it, which I've already tried anyway. I was practically begging her to take the dog back because I really couldn't handle it. But the issue is still the same: no one wanted to take the dog. Apparently I was the only one.

---

As time went by, I started to realize that perhaps I wasn't even looking at this from the right perspective. Let's just pretend that this dog is a human. Lived in a big mansion with a bunch of like-minded people, running around freely. And then having to adapt to a small 8mx8m apartment with just one guy. I guess on the first day he'd feel great, everything is new and all that. But he's got to feel something was off anyway. Everyone around him looked different, the street is loud, so many things he suddenly can't do. He'd be anxious, feeling trapped, frightened. And the boredom... He needed time to adapt, both to me and the environment around him.

So that explains it all. His newly found fear of harness, his barking at the outside noises, his aggressiveness towards other dogs. I mean I remember the first time I arrived here, alone, not knowing anyone and not understanding anything people said. For sure I didn't immediately turn into a model citizen at the time -- it took me some time to adapt, too.

When I look at it from that perspective, I can empathize more with him. I understand his struggles now and that does not even include hist past struggles. It's definitely not easy for him and I should be easier on him, too.

At first I didn't even want him to be on the couch and my bed, but to be fair, one third of my room is my couch and bed, so ruling them out is going to be impossible. I expected him not to be too attached with me, because I hate having to bring him out every time, but how is he supposed to understand that? So I bought a dog fence to really emphasize on that boundary. To add to that, I'm the only he knows around here: I feed him, take him for a walk and play with him, so it makes sense for him to feel a little attached.

---

Not gonna lie, when I was at my lowest dealing with the problems this dog has caused, I really wished the rescue shelter would've taken him the next day. I'd feel much better without him, or so I thought. I could go back to my usual routine, which isn't 180 degrees better but at least it's my comfort zone.

But as I spend time with him, walking him out, training him, giving him the love he deserves, I think I will be a little sad when the time comes for the rescue shelter to take him back. It's like what everyone said: "We don't deserve dogs". The love that they give back is so pure, so unselfish. Sure they have their impulses, but everyone has that too. It's a matter of how we handle it. That's how some people have peaceful, obedient dogs and some have, well, you know.

Besides, there are worse dogs out there. There are dogs who barks all day long, growl and bites their owner, wrecks all their furnitures to the smallest bits -- this tiny dude isn't even close to that. But if I were expecting a perfect dog, then yes he's always going to be far from my standard. That's not what I should've been expecting, anyway. He's a rescue dog from a specific breed in which many references would say not suitable for a first-time owner, who's only been with me for a week and a change. I mean...

---

So, I've stepped my foot into the pond, I might as well swim in it. I told the shelter it's going to be a month (actually I boasted and telling them 1.5 month but they seem to forget after I complained and all), so I'll stick to it. Good or bad, I'm going to continue my adventure with this little fella. I'm sure I'll learn many more things to come.

[callsignspark]

yes!!! the jenny slate

of it all!!! (I stole the screenshot you sent me.) as always your words are just too kind, below the cut for my responses <3 (also your tags are so freaking nice stop it before I actually cry)

his big arm around her waist - his arm is so big and strong. pls see below for a perfect example of his arms. oh yeah, it'll make Mary want to do more than blush too but she's not quite there just yet.

i can just picture college age reuben and mary attached at the hip in those labs of theirs - they are! their classes! their labs! the dining hall! the library! they're those friends that everyone thinks is secretly dating and they're like 🤢ew that's basically my sibling��

she tries to sneak away and make herself invisible, bradley still notices her? and notices her absence?? - everyone loves Mary; she's become friends with all of them since she moved to CA. but Bradley notices her like no one else does. he's always paying attention. he has this little spidey sense for where she is, despite how quiet and small she tries to make herself.

this is so soft and sweet. i’m dying to know what her impression of him from that night - your eyes welled up? mine welled up reading your comments!! I literally had to put my phone down and walk away last night omg. these two are soft and kind and sweet. will we see what she thought that night? maybe! yes. eventually also for anyone interested what her outfit looked likes (ignore that it's from shein, they just have so many options it's great for inspo)

i love how this mirrors what she does earlier? no one’s looking, so he sneaks away - they do mirror each other!! unintentionally! all the time! and she was staring from the kitchen, she's just much better about being subtle vs. his more obvious reactions. (that she doesn’t pick up on, bless her heart)

she just thinks he’s being sweet and kind - babygirl wake up! he's trying to flirt!

this is the hallmark of being a good - and smart - hostess! - yes! she's a fantastic hostess! it comes from being taught from an extremely young age that women's role at gatherings was to cook, clean, make everything run smoothly, and wait on the men. oops, I think I accidentally made it sad.

this entire paragraph is so pretty and lyrical - I was hoping someone would talk about this paragraph!!! the inspiration was this scene from Julie & Julia where Standley Tucci's character talks so lovingly about his wife's cooking skills/the joy she has in the kitchen!!!

so curious what they turned it into now? will we ever find out? 🤔hmmmmm🤔

oh all those poems we talked about earlier are really hitting again - no response everyone just read the poems Jordan sent me yesterday and cry about them because they are perfectly Mary.

i just loved how you formatted this part with separate paragraphs - the goal of the formatting was to (1) add humor but more importantly (2) emphasize how he's feeling about what he's overhearing. I feel like it really did it's job!!

they are so precious and good and sweet and lovely and that she only feels small around bradley - yes yes yes!! and it's not just that she feels small around him. it's that she feels safe around him and so her mind subconsciously associates him with feeling more relaxed. she doesn't have to make herself smaller, she doesn't have to take up less space, she doesn't have tuck herself away to make others more comfortable! bc he's always seeking her out, he wants her around! also I feel it's very important for everyone to know that the chair they're sharing looks like the one below. so she's really snuggled right into his side.

see now this line i find interesting and wonder if it’ll get back to someone? 👀idk👀will it?👀

Mar(r)y Me | part two

pairing: Bradley “Rooster” Bradshaw x Mariella “M&M” Vertucci (fem!OC)

summary: A love story told through friendship, laughter, and food.

series warnings: 18+ minors DNI, discussion of insecurities, difficult family relationships, discussions of food and alcohol use, extremely brief mentions of emotionally abusive ex-bf, eventual smut, warnings to be added as needed

word count: 3.4k

main masterlist

note: happy Friday! part two is here! and we meet Bradley today! thank you for the love on part one, I hope you all have a great weekend <3 (side note: if anyone recognizes where I adapted the very last line from, we are now best friends)

part two - strawberry shortcake

“Can we eat now? I’m tired of waiting for the chicken man!”

“Hangman, he’s five minutes late, and if you keep whining like a baby, you will be the last in line for food.” Mary’s hand shoots across the island, slapping the blonde’s hand away from the food. “Don’t even fucking think about it! Go sit in the living room!”

“Ow! I liked you better when you were too shy to yell at us yet.” He sulks into the next room, holding his hand to his chest. Only his ego is bruised, but Mary can hear him looking for sympathy from his best friend, giggling when she hears Coyote’s less-than-loving response.

“What’re you laughing at?”

“Oh my god!” She whips around, hand flying to her chest in a futile attempt to slow her heart. “Bradley! I didn’t hear you come in!”

“Sorry, Miss Mary, didn’t mean to scare ya.” The smirk on his face contradicting his apology.

She narrows her eyes. “Oh, you find this funny, bird boy? Hey Hangman?”

“Yes, ma’am?”

“You’re no longer at the back of the line for food! Rooster will be taking that spot from you.”

A celebratory shout comes from the living room while Bradley protests, “That’s not fair!”

“Guess you shouldn’t have laughed at me. Okay! Come get food while it’s still hot!” She’s almost bulldozed by the herd of hungry aviators storming their way into the kitchen. Bradley pulling her out of the way of Harvard and Fritz playfighting to be first in line.

“Careful, wouldn’t want you to catch an elbow with that cute lil nose of yours.” His thick arm wrapped around her waist, and the way he has to bend down to talk into her ear gets her heart pumping. She feels small next to him; she never feels small. Mary pats his arm in thanks before wiggling away to establish order of the buffet she laid out in the Fitches' kitchen, her face feeling as hot as the sausage she’d cooked up.

“Boys, stop fighting.” She thumps Fritz’s head as she passes, “Danielle and Reuben get food first; it’s their house.”

“Traditionally, the hosts go last!”

“It may be their house, but I cooked everything, so I’m the host, and I say the pregnant lady and her husband go first.” Danielle smacks Mary’s butt as she passes by to grab a plate. “This isn’t officially Reuben and Danielle’s anniversary, but it’s very close, so I’ve made a lot of their favorites tonight. All the food is labeled, but let me know if you have questions, and drinks are in the cooler in the yard, so help yourself before you sit down! Coyote?”

“We’re ignoring the slap?”

“Yes. It’s been over fifteen years, and nothing has stopped her yet; it’s just part of my life now.”

Danielle scoffs, “Oh, please. Like you don’t love it. I know for a fact that when you dated-”

“Okay! Hey! Have you guys ever heard the story of how Reuben and Danielle got together? It’s really embarrassing for Reuben.”

“No, but I would love to hear it!” Fanboy pipes up, just like she knew he would, getting Danielle off the topic of her former boyfriend, the one who had a thing for spanking.

“You haven’t even told Fanboy? Your WSO?” Danielle looks at her husband in faux shock. “Well, now Mary has to tell it!”

“Please do not tell this story.” Reuben groans from his seat, realizing his two favorite women aren't joking.

“Picture this. It's August 2007. The Phoenix spacecraft is on course for Mars, Ed Hardy is taking over men’s fashion, and it’s the first week of classes at SUNY Buffalo. I’m waiting outside of my 8AM chemistry lab with like twenty other students, all of whom are lax bros. This tall, lanky kid,” Mary jabs a thumb in the direction of Reuben, “-comes walking up, plants himself next to me on the bench outside the lab, and says, “Yo, I know the formula for table salt; what else could I possibly need to know?” and me, being the wonderful person I am, I took pity on him and made him my lab partner.”

“You just didn’t want to get partnered with those guys from the golf team.”

“I will not lie; that was a factor in my decision. Anyway, it turned out to be a huge mistake because he barnacled himself to me for the rest of the semester and apparently for the rest of my life.”

“I am a delight!”

“I dragged us through that class, kicking and screaming the entire way.” She explains how their duo became a trio after Reuben walked directly into Danielle. “She hit the sidewalk so hard, and Rico Sauvé over there froze, staring at her like an idiot while I helped her off the ground and apologized for him. I wish I could remember what I said… do you remember Danielle?”

“You said, and I’m quoting here, “I’m so sorry about him. I would make a joke about him being so tall that he doesn’t get enough oxygen, but the fact of the matter is that he’s just a fucking idiot.” And then she smacked him in the stomach to reboot him.”

The team erupts in laughter, Yale heckling him. “Bro! You knocked her over? That’s so bad; I can’t believe she went out with you!”

“Oh, I didn’t! Matchmaker Mariella convinced me to give him a shot after she and I became friends sophomore year. He was too scared to ask me out.” Danielle’s statement makes the laughter worse, tears gathering in Fanboy’s eyes.

“And it worked out, didn’t it?” Reuben leans over to kiss his wife. “We’ve been together for fifteen years, five moves, and two kids. Not too bad, huh, baby?”

“Oh god! Keep it in your pants; there are impressionable, young minds present!”

Danielle flips Hangman off, “Annie isn’t old enough to realize what’s going on!”

“Forget Annabeth! I was talking about Bob!”

That begins the biweekly argument of Phoenix defending her back-seater, which then spirals into whose dating life is the most pathetic. Omaha has won the past nine times for his horrible flirting techniques that have a 4% chance of working, according to Yale’s calculations. Mary always takes this as her cue to escape, knowing her romantic luck is the worst of them all, and she would win hands down. This time around, she collects the dinner dishes and sneaks through the back door, making a clean getaway until Bradley turns to whisper a joke in her ear and realizes she’s gone.

He scans the backyard, coming up empty until his eyes hit the kitchen window. For a minute he watches her doing dishes and bobbing her head to the radio perched on the windowsill in front of her, admiring how the pieces of hair that have escaped from her claw clip frame her face. The dark strands making the rosiness of her round cheeks stand out as she cleans up.

She’s so beautiful.

The same thought had passed through his mind eight months earlier when he first met the Fitch family’s best friend. It had been a regular night out at the Hard Deck. Everything was going as expected, except for Payback’s behavior. The normally calm and collected pilot bounced between groups, his neck on a constant swivel to the front door. After minimal prodding, he announced that his wife and his best friend from college were running late. Rooster was expecting another man similar to his teammate; a funny, chill guy, probably someone who had been on the swim team with Reuben.

He was thrown for a loop when Danielle stormed through the door, yelling about the babysitter being late and pulling a gorgeous brunette behind her.

Payback had tucked the mystery woman under his arm and introduced her to the group. “Everyone, this is my bestest friend, Mariella Vertucci. She is a brilliant mechanical engineer, an excellent cook, and an even better baker. Also, she’s single.”

“Oh my god, Reuben, stop it!” She had blushed and tried to duck away; her wide smile made Bradley’s heart flutter. He immediately wanted to talk to her, buy her a drink, play her favorite song on the piano, anything to get her to smile at him like that.

He had been disappointed when he learned she was only visiting for a few days. His disappointment had grown when Hangman and Coyote monopolized her time after finding out she had a knack for darts. The best part of his night was when she sat on the stool beside him for a breather. Bradley bought her a drink and made small talk; his brain unable to create meaningful conversation once he felt the soft material of her dress brush his calf. And then she was gone again, pulled back to the dartboard by Jake, who was happy to have someone to compete against. He had spent the rest of the night watching Jake joke with her. Mary’s laugh was the only thing in Bradley’s head when he went to bed that night.

He looks over at Jake now, where - for his own entertainment - the blonde man is turning the dating life comparisons into a game of cornhole. Content to stand on the sidelines with Annabeth snuggled on his chest and watch what is sure to turn into a disastrously overly competitive tournament.

When Bradley realizes no one is paying attention to him, he gathers the rest of the dirty dishes and heads inside. “I saw you sneak away; you missed my joke about Hangman getting stood up twice in the same week.”

“I try not to give Dani a chance to bring up my past mistakes; it works out better for everyone considering how often she’s set me up on a failed blind date.” She makes a face over her shoulder, making both of them laugh.

“Dinner was great, by the way. I haven’t had a homecooked meal like that in years.”

Mary feels her cheeks get darker at the compliment. Damn him for being handsome and sweet.

“I’m glad you liked it. I always- oh! I love this song; can you turn it up? My hands are all soapy.”

“Big Steve Miller Band fan, huh?” Bradley laughs and twists the knob. “What are we listening to?”

“The oldies station - 105.6 - they play everything from before 1990! I love them; it’s just like when I used to spend the day with my grandparents. They have a Big Band Music Monday, and if I close my eyes when Glen Miller is playing, I swear I can smell my Nona's perfume.” His smile matches hers, the joy of childhood memories splayed across her face as she rinses plates.

“Which towel should I use to dry?”

“You don’t have to-” Her voice gets louder as she talks over him, sensing the protest that’s coming. “But! If you’re going to insist, grab a fresh one from that drawer right there. And don’t worry about the pots and pans; Reuben likes to let those air-dry overnight. I just want to make sure everything else is as done as possible before I bring dessert out; those dishes can run in the dishwasher tonight.”

Bradley pauses where he’s putting silverware away, watching Mary sway to the music. “You made dessert too?”

“Yeah, we’re having my version of strawberry shortcake. It’s a twist on their wedding cake which was vanilla cake with strawberry filling.” She answers distractedly, closely examining a roasting dish that won’t come clean.

“You made their wedding cake too?”

She giggles at his shocked tone. “No, I had just moved to Missouri when they got engaged, so most of my maid of honor duties were performed virtually. But I did help pick the cake flavors out when I was up for the shower.”

“Lots of yelling at vendors on the phone?”

“Occasionally, when it was needed. I’m not a fan of yelling at people if it’s not necessary.”

“You yell at work all the time.”

“That’s because you idiots don’t listen to me! My entire career has been learning the best ways to fix those expensive ass planes you fly in every single day, yet you don’t listen when I-” She cuts herself off and flicks water at him when she realizes he’s teasing her. “You’re not funny, mister.”

“Sorry, sweetheart, it’s just too easy sometimes.” He knows he’s not really in trouble when she can’t hold her grin back.

“Just keep drying so we can have dessert.”

The two work quietly together, cleaning and packing up leftovers, seventies hits floating through the kitchen. As Mary cleans the sink, she looks at Bradley, who is trying to figure out which cabinet the serving platters go in. “When you get those put away, could you grab the strawberries from the garage fridge?”

Bradley hums his agreement, grinning at her when she points to the correct cupboard before heading out to the garage.

“As you requested.” He laughs at the grabby hands she makes towards the green container in his arms as he reenters the kitchen, eyes going wide when she removes the lid. “Shit, those look awesome.”

Mary’s nose scrunches at the compliment. “It’s because they’re super fresh. I picked them up from my favorite farm stand on the way home. And I used the sugar-to-berry ratio my Aunt Denna perfected years ago.”

Bradley watches in awe as she moves around the kitchen with an ease he’s never seen before; it’s like watching a one-person waltz. Her hands carefully fold the strawberries together, gently stirring them so they don’t break. Once combined to her standards, she plucks a sharp knife from out of nowhere and begins cutting the cake into even slices without any measuring. Mary does this while instructing him to get dessert plates out; her hips never stop moving to the music.

She stacks everything onto a serving tray that was hiding next to the fridge. It looks precariously balanced, and Bradley is about to offer his assistance when she swings the tray onto her shoulder and makes her way through the sliding door with no problems. He stands there for a second, stupidly staring after her like a lump on a log when he realizes she forgot the serving spoon.

He grabs the utensil and follows her path to the deck, a cheesy grin spreading across his face as he watches her realize she forgot something. She turns as Bradley brandishes the spoon in front of him like a sword and bows. “For you, m’lady.”

The peanut gallery pipes up. “Oh my god, Bradshaw. That was painful to watch.”

“No dessert for you, Jake.”

“Oh, come on!” Jake holds Annabeth up from his chest. “I was gonna share with little Oakley Annie here! You can’t take dessert away from me! You’re depriving her!”

“Dude, you have got to stop using my kid as a bargaining chip every time you make M&M mad.” The defeat in Danielle’s voice sends laughter through the group.

“For dessert, we’ve got strawberry shortcake with a Vertucci family twist. And a limited amount of whipped cream to go around, so please don’t go crazy until everyone has some, okay?”

A chorus of “Yes, ma’am” comes back at her as she hands the first plate to Dani, who had elbowed her way to the front of the line, using her pregnant belly to her advantage.

Mary is fulfilling Harvard’s request for extra syrup on his cake when Callie’s voice raises the question on several aviator’s minds. “Hey Mary, why is your callsign M&M?”

“Oh… uh….” She hesitates for a second before remembering she can trust these people. “Growing up in a bakery, I’ve always been the designated person to bring treats. Even in college, I was that person. After people found out I was the one who made the food, I would always jokingly get proposed to, and people started the “Marry Me” nickname. Which is such a brilliant play on my name.”

“Which was funny for a while, until a guy she used to date and his group of assholes caught wind of it and turned it into something decidedly not funny.” The anger in Reuben’s voice stops any potential questions.

“Yes, and then my knight in shining swim trunks over there almost got kicked off the team for fighting, and my ex got a knee to the family jewels courteous of the knight’s red-haired partner.” She rolls her eyes at the memory of how proud her two friends were to be in trouble for defending her honor. “Anyway, that pretty much killed the nickname, but M&M took its place.”

The yard is quiet, no one entirely sure what to say.

“I still can’t stand Austin.”

“I’m pretty sure he can’t stand you either after you sent one of his balls back into his body.” Mary snorts, feeling uncomfortable that the conversation about her emotionally abusive ex is still going. “It’s okay, everyone. That was a long time ago, and I brought M&M with me as my unofficial call sign when I started working with the Navy.”

It’s awkward for another minute until Hangman gets cornhole going again, handing Annabeth off to join the women at the picnic table. The game quickly gets competitive between the guys, and the evening returns to normal. As the attention moves away from her, Mary curls in on herself, feeling vulnerable about the information she had shared. The other women notice and make eye contact, a silent conversation passing between them.

“What a dingus. If I was your ex, I would have proposed to you for real after trying your mac and cheese.”

“Callie, I called dibs after she made those cupcakes at Easter.” Natasha protests.

“Absolutely not! Of anyone, I get the first crack at her; I’ve known her the longest.”

“Danielle, I know you’re pregnant, but I will literally fight you.”

It’s enough to break the tension and make Mary laugh. “Ladies, ladies, please, no fighting. There’s enough of my food to go around.”

“And what about you? There’s only enough of you for one of us.” Nat throws an arm around Callie’s shoulders, winking at her fellow aviator, silly smiles spreading across their faces.

“I think if we really tried, there would be plenty of me for both of you.” She winks back before taking a stack of empty plates inside.

The table settles into a stunned silence, Danielle’s laugh interrupting after a few seconds. “I forgot you guys haven’t seen Mary flirt before!”

Bradley’s heart stops from where he’s eavesdropping in a lawn chair. Is that why she never responds to my flirting? He feels like an ass, trying to catch the attention of a woman who potentially doesn’t even like men.

“She flirts with Jake all the time!”

Bradley chugs the rest of his beer.

“No, that’s not flirting. They’re just bantering each other. Besides, Jake is a good-looking guy, but he’s not really what she looks for in a man.”

“Oh! Forget Jake! She is single, right? Because I have a friend who would be perfect for her, she’s a middle school math teacher, and she has the same sense of humor as Mary!”

Danielle lowers her voice, “She is single, and she’s said now that she’s more settled out here, she wants to try dating again. But if everything goes the way I think it will, there will be no need for us to set her up.”

“What do you-” Natasha gets cut off by Danielle pointing at something off the deck.

The three women turn their attention to the backyard. At some point during their conversation, Mary had slipped past them and settled next to Bradley on the two-seater Adirondack chair. They subtlety observe as Mary leans into his side, giggling and whispering in his ear about something as she gestures towards the game. Bradley throws his head back as he laughs, wrapping his arm around her shoulder and dipping his head down to respond. They watch as Mary buries her head in his shoulder to muffle her laughter, and three sets of eyebrows raise in unison as the back of Bradley’s neck turns redder than the strawberries they’d just eaten.

“Wow. I vote that we only intervene if those two take longer than three months to get their shit together.” Callie looks around the table for concurrence.

Natasha grimaces. “Usually, I’d agree, but they’ll probably end up needing a nudge. Rooster moves slower than molasses in January when he’s interested in a woman for something more than a night.”

“They’ll definitely need a nudge, and I’m already working on it because, lemme tell you…” Danielle pauses, her heart warming at the shy smile on her best friend’s face as Bradley pulls her further into his body. “He’s in there with the champ.”

thank you for reading <3 if you would like to be added (or removed) from the tag list just send me an ask! have a good one!

tagging: @gretagerwigsmuse | @bobfloyds | @bussyslayer333 | @hangmanbrainrot | @mothdruid | @notroosterbradshaw | @princessphilly | @rhettabbotts | @roleycoleyreccenter | @roosterbruiser | @seresinsweetie | @thesewordsareallihavetogive | @waklman | @withahappyrefrain | @a-court-of-roscoe-and-baby | @genius2050 | @ohtobeleah | @katieshook02 | @hellojameshowyadoin

fic tag | credit for dividers here

[elvisabutler]

good girls clean up their messes

summary: austin didn't used to have a housewife kink and neither did you. funny how life-uh- finds a way to change that. fandom: austin butler rating: m pairing: austin butler x female reader word count: 2100 warnings: housewife kink. unprotected p in v ( though can be read as committed relationship birth control situation ). cleaning kink? minor breeding kink. praise kink. brief mention of the pandemic and how austin was a recluse for a bit. author's note: welcome to day 25 of kinktober, housewife kink with austin butler. this was fun. truly i'd actually have written more but i had this view of cleaning in my head vs anything else. so honestly, anyone asks and i'll write a whole big long thing about it but for now, enjoy this little tiny thing. also thank you @pennyroyalcreep for being the one to ask for this. i had hoped someone would choose austin for this kink vs anyone else so i was pleased as punch about it when you did.

You were never made to be a housewife, you've told Austin this on more than one occasion. Even when you first met him and were first talking to him, you told him that despite how perhaps you looked it, all warm and inviting, it wasn't your sort of style. Life had a funny way of changing those things sometimes. It started out slow, after all you were the one with a faintly normal nine to five-ish job, he was the one who had to jet across the world half the time. It made sense that you would keep where you were living and he at least- stopped by clean. You weren't a heathen, you knew how to make your house look presentable. The first time Austin had come back from being away for a while was the Elvis press tour and he had been expecting to see the house in some sort of disarray, maybe you hadn't been keeping up with the laundry or maybe their were dishes piled up in the sink. Instead, what greeted him was his girlfriend- the woman he fell in love with when the world went to shit, he became a goddamn recluse for six months, and everyone had let things fall by the wayside- in her pjs doing the dishes with these stupid little green gloves that in your own words- "kept me from getting dirty while cleaning".

All Austin could think about when he saw you that way is making you as dirty as he could. His teeth bit at his lower lip, picturing you taking off those gloves, making a show of it as he just sank to his knees and showed you just how much he appreciated your effort to keep the place clean. In fact, that had been what he decided to do the moment he wrapped his arms around your waist and you had let out a small gasp at his clothed erection.

It got worse after that, with him finding every excuse to just watch you clean and you finding that you didn't mind. You wanted to show Austin how you could keep things going, wanted his praise telling you how good you were, how he had the best girlfriend that he'll marry when he gets just a minute to himself. How you made everything so clean only for him to dirty it up with you. How you clean up the kitchen when the two of you cook knowing fully well he wants to have his dessert on the table, spread out on the tablecloth, chasing your pleasure higher and higher until he has to suck on your clit just so in a way that has you almost breaking the table when you come back down to Earth with a thump.

Bikeriders is- complicated when it comes to him coming home and you hate it, it's led to you having to show him FaceTime videos of the clean bedroom and the dishes and him forcing them to let him take a break because he just wants to eat dinner with his girlfriend. It's led to praise being over text and over the phone with him stroking his cock and you curling your own fingers inside yourself or using that one vibrator Austin hates. You miss him and he misses you just as much if his moans are anything to go by, if his grunts and whispers of your name are anything to go by.

It's a Saturday and you find that there's more than a bit more dust in the house than you'd like, that and you've let the glass door leading out to the backyard remain a little too dirty for your liking. Austin had mentioned the possibility of being able to fly in for the weekend, something about an award or a round table discussion but he hadn't told you when he'd be coming in. You take a chance on him coming in early, choosing to be a little silly and wear a French maid costume you had bought for yourself last Halloween and turn on your cleaning playlist, allowing the mix of electroswing, rock and jazz fly through the air as you got started on your efforts. The door is easy enough, done in about thirty minutes and left to settle before you would go back and see if you missed any spots. Now came the hard part, the dusting that usually would have you sniffling by the end of it but you hoped it would be different this time.

Your wish is granted, just not in the way you planned for it as Austin opens the door to the house and walks in only to find you bent over, no underwear under the costume you're wearing and he has to bite his lip to swallow the groan that threatens to escape him at the image and the knowledge. He knows perfectly well how engrossed you get in your music when you're cleaning, having once snuck up on you and swayed to the beat of the music for what felt like ten minutes- it was only five- before you realized his presence and had abandoned your task. You're near the window you had just cleaned, dusting the bottom part of an end table nearby and Austin drops his bags quietly, allowing himself to sneak up on you until you feel his hands grip your hips. The gasp that leaves you is closer to the breath leaving your body, especially as Austin uses his grip to pull you into a standing position, feeling just how hard you've already made him.

"Hey baby." He murmurs into your ear, kissing the side of your neck and nipping at your earlobe. "No panties and you're dusting in this. You love painting such a pretty picture for me, don't you?"

The voice you have, the one that normally snarks at him leaves your head right in that exact moment knowing fully well you need to use it. Your answer is predictable because of it. "I have to make sure my hardworking man comes home to a nice clean house." You swallow and shake your head a little, ignoring how Austin's hands are sliding up your torso, making their way to your chest. "I've seen how messy his hotel rooms can get."

His laugh vibrates against your back and the noise slips into one ear only to settle in your brain, you missed hearing that laugh in person. "Low blow. Valid, but is that any way to treat me after all this time?"

A giggle leaves your mouth unprompted as you try and focus on dusting once more. "Yeah, maybe just a little."

He hums as an answer to your sass, cupping your breasts as he grinds against you slowly. "Want to fuck you, baby. Want to make a mess of you while you clean."

Your breath quickens just slightly as you grind back against him, allowing you to feel the roughness of the fabric of his pants against your bare ass before you pull away, smoothing down your skirt. "I've still got to dust around the door, Austin."

The noise that comes out of him when you moves sounds like a growl as he pulls you against him again. When he speaks it comes out almost as a whine. "I can just flip up that skirt while you're dusting, baby. Promise I won't make you smudge the nice clean window with your body. Just want to fuck you against the door."

You know your neighbors can likely see what Austin's doing, see how he's slowly pinning you against the door, the front of your body pressed against the cool glass, giving you some relief from how hot just having Austin pressed against you is making you feel. Your answer comes out in a pant.

"Fine. Just, you're doing the top of the door, you tree."

Austin would have laughed at you calling him a tree if he wasn't so distracted with undoing his pants and pulling down his boxers as he flipped up the skirt, exposing your now wet core to the air of the room. Unbidden, a small keen escapes your mouth as he pushes into you without warning. It's not unwelcome, but you hadn't expected him to go all in immediately. Your ass grinds backwards against him as you brace yourself against the door.

"Fuck. So fucking wet for me. You're- Perfect. That's- Got the best girlfriend, cleaning my house, cleaning the dishes, wearing outfits like this. Didn't even have this kink before but god." His words are punctuated by his thrusts, each one causing you to thump against the glass. "My pretty little housewife, doesn't even need to cook but she does. Doesn't need to do all of this but you do this just for me. You going to keep doing it? When I marry you do I get to keep this little housewife?"

"Not a housewife, Aus." You huff out a laugh, focusing on the noises of his cock entering and exiting you, it sounds like there's so much fluid that you swear you'd be surprised if there's not a puddle below your feet when you're done. "Still got my job."

"Doesn't make you any less of one." He growls against the shell of your ear, his hands dipping in between the fabric of the outfit and your skin to squeeze your breast and then your nipple. "You're gonna be my housewife, aren't you? Even when we get married you'll keep the house clean. Even when I give you a baby, you'll do it, won't you."

Your cunt clenches around him at the last part, causing embarrassment to flood your system as he chuckles. "Full of my kid, cleaning my house, making food, being such a good girl. My gorgeous housewife, my fantastic housewife that I don't deserve."

If your head starts to roll back against his shoulder, neither one of you comment on it, instead Austin uses it as a chance to kiss your neck, nipping at it occasionally as he keeps thrusting into you, stealing your breath when he hits just the right angle. One of your hands drifts toward your clit, trying to see if you can come before Austin swats it out of the way.

"No, let me take care of that. Don't want to get that pretty pussy all dirty with dust. Let me reward you, baby." He whispers as he moves to rub it, allowing you to gasp at the sensation. You can see smudges forming from your hands, from your breasts, from your skin against the glass and you find you don't mind just this once. Instead you allow yourself to grind against, his fingers, his ass, just allow yourself to move in whatever way you can to chase your high. Austin's hips are starting to stutter, his thrusts become a little erratic as he feels himself about to come before he pinches your clit in a way that should be painful but has you hitting your head against the glass door lightly, your cunt clenching around his cock, milking it as he comes with a groan against your neck. You stay like that for a few minutes, both of your legs too shaky to move before he pulls out of you, earning a mild sob of distress from your throat.

He turns you around to let himself kiss you, his thigh moving to between your legs just in case you want to rock against it. You do just slightly before you speak. "You made me smudge the glass."

Austin's laugh and smile fill the whole room with sunlight you didn't realize just how much you were missing until that exact moment. He shrugs. "I did, didn't I? Guess I'll just have to watch you clean it again. Oh no, what a tragedy."

You smack him lightly with the duster and point to the top of the door. "Laugh it up, Aus. Do that and I'll think about it."

He moves his thigh, allowing his knee to press against your clit. "My perfect little housewife isn't going to stand for that dirt. I'm getting to watch it."

It's then that you finally move his thigh back, allowing you to walk away from him, hips swaying just so as you walk to pick up the glass cleaner from the floor, exposing your cunt leaking his cum to him. "Maybe. Depends on how nice your housewife is feeling. Get to cleaning, Aus. The clock is ticking."

You both forget about cleaning about fifteen minutes in. Oh well, there was always tomorrow.

[thatshithurted8]

jeff wittek imagine where the reader and jeff go on vacation together like to vegas or miami???

Holiday 

Summary: Throughout your mini holiday in Miami with your boyfriend Jeff, he realizes just how special you and your relationship are. 

Word Count: 2.3k

Warning: Tooth rotting fluff, mention of alcoholism and Jeff’s accident

A/N This is also inspired by KSI’s song Holiday! 

I wanna wake up every mornin', feelin' better 'Cause I know you're sleeping by my side And every moment we're together I remember just to keep it all for you and I

Jeff’s brown eyes slowly open, being awoken by a crying baby that was a few rows behind you two. He lets out a yawn before looking over at you who were fast asleep on his shoulder. 

Something that not a lot of people knew was that Jeff hated flying despite being a certified skydiver. Ever since he was younger he was never a fan of flying, only now he was a bit more comfortable with it due to his experience skydiving. Nevertheless his initial nerves after waking up quickly wash away just from being in your presence.

Wanting to capture this seemingly perfect moment, Jeff slowly grabs his phone out of his pocket without disturbing you and takes a quick picture. As he analyzes the picture his heart swells at how at peace and comfortable you looked sleeping on him and in one of his sweaters. The two of you were extremely tired from catching a red eye flight to Miami so no wonder why you both fell asleep. 

Saving the picture Jeff puts his phone away and slowly opens the blind of your window seat. The rising sun shines into your row, the rays illuminating your face making your features and long lashes more prominent. The purpose of the trip to Miami was to watch the Logan Paul vs Floyd Mayweather fight. In fact you were ecstatic when Jeff told you he got you guys tickets to the event since you grew up watching boxing with your family and you were a huge fan of Mayweather. With that being said you had no idea how close the tickets Jeff got were to the ring. 

Jeff’s breath hitches as he admires you. He was so in love with you and was so excited to see your reaction to being ringside. As Jeff softly moves some stray hairs out of your face he realizes everything he does is for the benefit for not only you, but your relationship as well. It was you two against the world. 

I see that body in the sunlight Feelin' the heat and it feels right I wanna do this for the rest of my life

“I know you guys are dating and all, but you seriously need to stop staring before you sink the boat with your drool.” Mike Maijlak says walking over to Jeff’s side and handing him a La Croix. 

Jeff booked your mini holiday to last a few days before and after the fight which gave you guys the opportunity to explore Miami and let lose. With that being said neither of you were going to turn down Mike’s invite to join him on a yacht to party. So there you were talking and dancing with some girls you knew from LA while sipping on a La Croix. 

Jeff lets out a laugh while opening one of his favourite drinks. “I can’t help it man, just look at her.” He says taking a sip of the bubbly liquid while continuing to admire you from afar. 

The Miami sun that shined onto your skin paired with your infectious laugh, seemingly gave you a golden glow that made you standout. Not only that, but the bikini that you were wearing flattered your body type so well. 

After feeling as if someone was staring at you for the past few minutes you finally turn and look around the boat to find the owner of the eyes that were on you. Quickly your eyes find Jeff’s brown ones and you realize it was just Jeff staring at you the whole time, causing heat to wash over your body at his gaze. 

You shoot him a smirk and wink in return before turning back around to continue your conversation. A smirk of his own falls upon Jeff’s face as you do so, along with a light shade of pink on his cheeks. 

“You’re so whipped.” Mike laughs shaking his head, finally speaking up after watching the whole interaction. 

“Well I wanna be whipped for her for the rest of my life then.” Jeff says without realizing how big of a statement that was while his eyes remained on your beautiful figure. 

Oh, I know, I know, you know the vibe I wanna stay with you every night You and me underneath the lights I'm always good when you're by my side I know, you know you're on my mind You really make me come alive I wanna be here for the rest of my life

“Jeff look at my hands I’m literally shaking I can’t believe we’re this close!” You exclaim while glancing between your boyfriend and the boxing ring in front of you. 

“Only the best for you doll.” He says sending you a wink while laughing. For the past hour and a half as you two watched the undercards you continued to gush about your seats making Jeff happy to see you happy. 

Without wasting another second you roughly grab Jeff by his green shirt and pull him in for a passionate kiss. Just before the brunette could immerse himself into it fully you pull away. Some of your lipstick was smudged and Jeff knew without a doubt he had some on his lips, but he didn’t care. In that moment it truly seemed as if you two were the only ones there under the rings bright lights and in an arena full of screaming fans while you two stared into each others eyes lovingly. 

Your attention on your boyfriend is torn away when the already loud arena becomes even louder as Mayweather starts to walk out. Quickly you start to cheer for your favourite boxer while jumping up and down and clapping excitedly. Jeff glances between you and the boxing legend before his gaze finally lands on you. 

You look over at your boyfriend with a smile that was from ear to ear. “It’s Floyd fucking Mayweather!” You exclaim pointing over to the undefeated boxer entering the ring. 

A smile washes over Jeff’s face as he laughs at your excitement. You truly resembled a child in a toy store. Seeing your excitement only made Jeff more excited, causing him to join in on cheering for Mayweather despite being friends with Logan. 

There was no one else Jeff would rather be with to witness the fight and this thought only made him realize he wants to be by your side for the rest of his life. 

Looking for sun rays, needin' them good days Fly me away-away, you're my holiday Cool like the ocean, lost in emotion Fly me away-away, you're my holiday Whenever you're here it's a good time Strawberry shirts in the sunshine Ice-cold drinks 'til the moonlight You're my holiday Whenever you're here it's a good time Strawberry shirts in the sunshine Ice-cold drinks 'til the moonlight You're my holiday

The next few days after the fight was a whirlwind, but in a good way. Despite having a good time underneath the Miami sun and it’s nightlife Jeff wouldn’t be having as good of a time if you weren’t there. You truly made the trip for him, making the sunny days that were good for his mental health even better and the dreary days full of life from your infectious positivity and smile.  

You let out a loud laugh as you and Jeff wrap your arms around each others, mimicking a toast before brining your drink to your lips while your boyfriend did the same. At the same time you two sip at your virgin drinks while maintaining eye contact with each other in the close position. You gulp down the rest of your cold drink despite it being alcohol free before untangling your arm with Jeff’s and ordering another at the outside bar. 

Over the past four years of knowing Jeff the two of you created a special connection that no one in your friend group had with each other. And that was being sober. Jeff turned to alcohol after his break up with his ex girlfriend while you on the other hand turned to it to deal with the death of your mom. To say you were there for each other was an understatement. When the temptation to drink was too much Jeff would call you up and the two of you would go on late night hikes and talk about everything and anything, and vice versa for you. There was always a mutual pining for one another, but neither of you acted on it due to how broken you both were at the time. However, as the years went by your feelings only intensified along with Jeff’s. Though it wasn’t until a few months after Jeff’s accident when he took a leap of faith and finally confessed his feelings to you after realizing how short life truly was.

Jeff places his glass on the bar as well, placing his hand on the small of your back while looking around the crowded club that was partly inside and partly outside. Once you get a refill of your drink you turn around sipping on the paper straw, your back leaning against the bar causing Jeff to redirect his attention back to you. 

“You look beautiful.” He says looking down at you in his arms. 

Heat washes over your face and Jeff’s smile widens at how flustered you still got after all this time together. He loved showering you in words of affirmation and he meant every thing he said to you. Although, you always look beautiful the way the moonlight reflected off of your skin made you look angelic. It was a great contrast to you earlier in the day at the beach wearing a strawberry printed bikini that made Jeff feel a certain way. 

“Thank you baby you don’t look too bad yourself.” You say placing a soft peck on Jeff’s lips before pulling him towards the dance floor. 

I wanna stay up 'til the mornin' with you talkin' Just to listen to the things you say And every time we're in the middle of the city I imagine us so far away

The two of you sat down in a booth with Mike Majilak and Logan Paul at a random Denny’s that was in between your hotel and the club you four were previously partying at. By now the jet lag and the numerous activities you and Jeff participated in was starting to catch up to you. However, that wasn’t apparent to anyone other than Jeff as you talked the boys ears off while eating. 

“We’ll see you guys later! And once again Y/N text me when you’re free to film an episode of ImPaulsive.” Logan says as him and Mike get out of the booth, placing money on the table and getting ready to leave the restaurant. 

“Of course!” You exclaim before picking up your lemonade and drinking what was left. Jeff bids his goodbyes to the two influencers and once they leave you quickly rest your head on his broad shoulder, letting out a loud sigh. 

“You okay doll?” Jeff asks placing his hand on your thigh. 

“Yea just tired.” You say kissing his neck and placing your hand on his cheek. Similar to Jeff you were able to pick up on the energy of situations and that affected how you acted. So once Mike and Logan left you felt as if you could finally wind down from their partying aura. 

A comforting silence falls upon you two and your eyes slowly flutter close as the rising sun shines in through the Denny’s windows. As cliche as it sounded Jeff felt as if it was only you two in the quiet breakfast place. The brunette rests his head against yours and his eyes follows your lead by shutting close. 

The two of you remain in this position for a few minutes, cherishing not only the first quiet moment of the trip, but also the little moments you two shared. 

Ooh, ooh Ooh, you're my holiday

Scratching at his eyes and stretching Jeff slowly and quietly gets out of bed, the sun filtering in through the hotels curtains and onto your sleeping body. You looked so peaceful and he didn’t want to disturb that. Once you guys returned to your hotel room from a night out partying and a very early breakfast at Denny’s the two of you instantly fell asleep. 

Jeff glances at the analogue clock on the bedside table which read 2:34pm before he slips on a pair of pants and a t-shirt. Making sure to not wake you Jeff grabs his phone, wallet and room key then quietly leaves your shared room. However, before he leaves he makes sure to place a gentle kiss on your forehead and whisper to you how much he loves you. 

Throughout the trip he was constantly reminded of how much he loved you. You helped him through some of the darkest times in his life and after all this time of knowing and being together Jeff finally knew what he had to do. 

Remembering a shop that was a few buildings away from your hotel, Jeff quickly walks over to it wanting to be back before you woke up. The Staten Island native hands become clammy as he approaches the store, his tough guy persona seemingly crashing down with every step he took. 

The bell above the shops door dings as Jeff walks in causing a sales representative to walk over to him with a welcoming smile. 

“Good afternoon how can I help you?” She asks. Jeff takes a look around the quaint shop and all of the glass casings before redirecting his attention back to the worker. 

“Hi uh yea, I was wondering if you guys have any engagement rings?” 

[nim-lock]

Art Career Tips, 2021 Edition

Here’s an edited version of my 2019 answered ask, because... this feels relevant. 

It is a problem of capitalism that folks equate their income as a judgement of their value as people; and let me preface. You are worth so much. You have inherent value in this world. Your income is not a judgement on who you are (plenty of billionaires are actively making the world worse). LARPing self-confidence will go a long way to helping you get paid more for your work, because clients will believe that you know what you are doing, and are a professional. 

& real quick—my own background is that I’ve been living off my art since 2018. I went to art school (Pratt Institute). I work in a publishing/educational materials sphere, and a quarter of my income is my shop. Not all of this information may apply to you, so it is up to you to look through everything with a critical eye, and spot pick what is relevant. 

So there are multiple ways of getting income as an artist; 

Working freelance or full-time on projects

Selling your stuff on a shop

Licensing (charging other companies to use your designs)

This post primarily covers the freelance part; if you’re interested in the other bits there is absolutely info out there on the internet. 

IF you are just starting (skip to next section if not applicable) dream big, draw often (practice helps you get better/more efficient), do your best to take "a bad piece” lightly. You’re gonna RNG this shit. At some point your rate of “good” works will get higher. Watch tutorial videos & read books. A base understanding of “the rules”; anatomy, perspective, composition, color helps you know what the rules are to break them. This adds sophistication to your work. One way you can learn this stuff is by doing “studies”—you’re picking apart things from life, or things other people have done, to see what works, and how it works. 

Trying to turn your interests into a viable career means that you are now a SMALL BUSINESS; it really helps to learn some basic marketing, graphic design, figure out how to write polite customer service emails; etc. You can learn some of this by looking it up, or taking skillshare (not sponsored) classes by qualified folks. Eventually some people may get agents to take care of this for them—however, I do recommend y’all get a basic understanding of what it takes to do it on your own, just so you can know if your agent is doing a good job. 

Making sure your portfolio fits the work you want to get

Here is a beginner portfolio post. 

Research the field you’d like to get into. The amount people work, the time commitment, the process of making the thing, the companies & people who work for them. 

Create work that could fit in to the industry you’re breaking into. For example, if you want to do book cover illustration, you draw a bunch of mockup book covers, that can either be stuff you make up, or redesigns of existing books. If you’re not 100% sure what sort of work is needed for the industry, loop back into the portfolios of artists in a similar line of work as whatever you’re interested in, and analyze the things they have in common. If something looks to be a common project (like a sequence of action images for storyboard artists), then it’s probably something useful for the job. 

CLIENTS HIRE BASED ON HOW WELL THEY THINK YOUR WORK FITS WHAT THEY WANT. If they’re hiring for picture books, they’re gonna want to see picture book art in your portfolio, otherwise they may not want to risk hiring you. Doesn’t have to be 100% the project, but stuff similar enough. If you aren’t hired, it doesn’t mean your work is bad, it just wasn’t the right fit for that specific client. 

If you have many interests, make a different section of your portfolio for each!

Making sure you’re relevant 

Have a social media that’s a little more public-facing, and follow people in the career field you’re interested in. Fellow artists, art directors, editors, social media managers; whoever. Post on your own schedule. 

Interact with their posts every so often, in a non-creepy way. 

If you’ve made any contacts, great! Email these artists, art directors, editors, former professors, etc occasional updates on your work to stay in touch AND make sure that they think about you every so often.

Show up to general art events every once in a while! If you keep showing up to ones in your area (when... not dying from a sneeze is a thing), folks will eventually start to remember you. 

Industry events & conferences can be pricey, so attend/save up for what makes sense for you. Industry meetups are important for networking in person! In addition to meeting people with hiring power, you also connect with your peers in the community. Always bring a portfolio & hand out business cards like candy. 

Active job hunting

Apply to job postings online.

If interested in working with specific people at specific companies, you could send an email “I’d love to work with you, here’s my portfolio/relevant experience”, even if they aren’t actively looking for new hires. Be concise, and include a link to your work AND attached images so the person reading the email can get a quick preview before clicking for more. 

Twitter job postings can be pretty underpaid! Get a copy of the Graphic Artists’ Guild Handbook Pricing & Ethical Guidelines to know your rate. I once had a twitter post job listing email me back saying that other illustrators were charging less, and I quote, “primarily because they’re less experienced and looking for their first commission”. This was not okay! For reference, this was a 64-illustration book. The industry rate of a children’s book (~36 pages) is $10k+, and this company’s budget was apparently $1k. For all of it. 

Congrats you got a job! Now what?

Ask for like, 10% more than they initially offer and see if they say yes. If they do, great! If not, and the price is still OK, great! Often company budgets are slightly higher than they first tell you, and if you get this extra secret money, all the better for you. 

Make sure you sign a contract and the terms aren’t terrible (re: GO GET THE  Graphic Artists’ Guild Handbook Pricing & Ethical Guidelines) 

Be pleasant and easy to work with (Think ‘do no harm but take no shit’)

Communicate with them as much as needed! If something’s going to be late, tell them as soon as you know so they aren’t left wondering or worse, reaching out to ask what’s up. 

And if all goes well, they’ll contact you about more jobs down the line, or refer you to other folks who may need an artist, etc. 

Quick note about online shops/licensing and why they’re so good

It’s work that you do once, that you continuously make money off of. Different products do well in different situations (conventions vs. online, and then further, based on how you market/the specific groups you are marketing to), so products that may not do well initially may get a surge later on. 

Start with things that have low minimum order quantity and are relatively cheap to produce, like prints and stickers. 

If you are not breaking even, go back to some of the earlier portions of this and think about how you could tweak things as a small business. Ease of access is also very important with this; for example, if you only take orders through direct messages, that immediately shuts off all customers who don’t like talking to strangers. 

Quick resource that you could look through; it’s the spreadsheet of project organizing that I made a while back 

Licensing is when people pay you for the right to use your work on stuff they need to make, like textbooks or greeting cards. This is generally work you’ve already made that they are paying the right to use for a specified time or limited run of products. This is great because you’ve already done the work. I am not the expert on this. Go find someone else’s info.

“I am not physically capable of working much”/ “I need to pay the bills”

Guess who got a hand injury Sept 2020 that messed me up that entire month! I had a couple jobs going at the time that I was terrified of losing, but they were quite understanding when I told them I needed to heal. So:  Express your needs as early as you know you need them. Also do lots of stretches and rest your hands whenever you feel anything off; this will save your health later. Like, the potential of a couple months of no income was preferable over losing use of my hands for the rest of my life.

This continues to apply if you have any other life situation. Ask for extra time. Ask for clarification. If you tell people ahead of time, folks are often quite understanding. Know how much you are capable of working and do your best not to overdo it. (I am.. bad at this)

Do what MAKES SENSE for your situation. If doing art currently earns you less money than organizing spreadsheets, then do that for now, and whenever you have the energy, break down some of the tips above into actionable tiny chunks, and slowly work at em. 

The original ask I got in 2019 mentioned ‘knowing you’re not good enough yet’. Most artists experience imposter syndrome & self-doubt—the important thing is to do your best, and if anything, attempt to channel the confidence of a mediocre white man. If he can apply to this job/charge hella money for Not Much, then so can you! 

Check out this Art Director tumblr for more advice!

Danichuatico’s Literary Agent guide

Kikidoodle’s Shop Shipping Tutorial

Best of luck!

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Once again disclaimer this post is just the ramblings of a man procrastinating on other things that need to be done. I’ve Long Posted my own post so that it turns into mush in my brain if I try to read it, but I wrote this so I should know this content. If you got down here, congrats. Here’s a shrimp drawing.

Yee Ha. 

My reference post tag My tip jar